What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Dante keeps leaving messages for Lulu, telling her he’s on The Haunted Star. Lulu keeps rising to the top of the water and trying to get his attention.

Morgan is handcuffed to a chair, basically going bananas. Michael keeps trying to explain what the problem is, and you’d think people would get it, especially in 2016. Jordan says she wants Michael restrained and in a holding cell, but Andre steps in, saying Morgan is his patient.

The paramedics finally arrive at the pier. Carly wipes her bloody hands on her really nice sweater and I say, why, Carly, why? Anna tells Paul the whole thing was a disaster and their main guy got away, like he doesn’t know this already. And like it’s his fault Morgan interfered.

Dixon says the cripple wants to be a hero. Does anyone really talk like that? He doesn’t trust Sonny and he says he should shoot Sonny, since it’s his son’s fault that this happened. He points the gun at Sonny, and Alexis says he doesn’t want to shoot a man in a wheelchair in front of his daughter. Yes, let’s reason with a man who sounds like he came from a 50s gangster movie.

Kiki is taken to the hospital. Paul asks Carly how Morgan ended up there. She says she doesn’t know and he says she should, because he just messed up a major operation. Anna asks Carly for any information and Carly tells her about the phone message. Paul says Dixon was gong to shoot Morgan and Kiki tried to push him out of the way.

Andre asks Jordan if Morgan seems rational. He says Morgan needs medication and sedation. and that Morgan needs to come with him now.

Dixon wants to know who Sonny’s other kid is. Sonny reminds him of the 2 million. Dixon says the bride broke the rules and aims his gun at Alexis. Julian offers him 5 million to go away. Dixon bidding wars! Dixon says he’ll make an exception for the bride since he’s sentimental that way. Maxie asks if she can have help and Lucas offers to take her place. Dixon says no. Nina tries to help and Dixon says Maxie better know what she’s doing because no one else is getting up.

Nicholas offers his resources, including a private helicopter. Dixon asks who he is. Nicholas tells him that he’s Prince Cassadine. Dixon wants to know how he knows the happy couple. Nicholas says Alexis is his aunt. Dixon wants information as to who the bridesmaids are and who is Sonny’s daughter. I’m not even sure, so good luck with that.

Dante finally gets a clue and jumps in the water. He eventually sees Lulu face down. He brings her to the surface.

Paul wants to know if Morgan found out about the gun shipment from Sonny. Carly says Sonny doesn’t want Morgan in the business. Carly wants to go to Kiki. Paul tries to stop her, but Anna says to let her go. Anna tells Paul that the mere fact that a bystander was shot is unacceptable. Paul tells her that Morgan showed up armed maybe wanted to hijack the shipment. He says this might help them to take Sonny down. Anna says they need to concentrate on Dixon and wonders where he might be. Paul says Ava was his only contact.

Andre says Morgan is a suicide risk and does Jordan want a lawsuit. This ruffles Jordan’s feathers and she starts barking orders at everyone. Andre says he’s just looking out for his patient who’s in a manic episode, and he’s not trying to trump her authority. Jordan allows him to take Morgan. Michael tells Morgan he can see Kiki if he cooperates with the doctors. Jordan says don’t make her regret her decision.

The desk sergeant tells Jordan that someone just heard shooting from the chapel.

Dixon says he only needs one hostage, so which one is Sonny’s daughter? Sam says she is and Dixon says he can see from Sonny’s face, she’s not. Sonny says if he hurts any of the girls, he’s dead. Dixon asks if Sonny is going to kill him with harsh language. He says Sonny is helpless and just stalling and is starting to annoy him. Why it doesn’t occur to him that Sonny might have a gun or light saber or something, I don’t know. It’s not exactly like he checked for that.

Dixon asks Ava if she has anything to contribute. She advises him to take Sonny and Julia’s offers. He says fine, he’ll tell them where to send the money as soon as he gets where he’s going with Sonny’s daughter. Ava offers herself as a hostage.

Dante gets Lulu to land and performs CPR. He tells her he loves her and he and Rocco need her.

Andre gets Morgan to the hospital. Morgan says he doesn’t need to be admitted. Andre says if he can’t manage that, he’s going to have to be restrained. Morgan sits with Michael on a bench. Amazingly, they’ve gotten there before Kiki did. She’s wheeled in and Morgan gets crazy again.

Dixon says taking Ava does nothing to hurt Sonny. She says the girls will just make him a bigger target. He shoots the gun in the air and tells her to take her seat. He takes Molly and the girls all go nuts. Kristina says it’s her and Dixon grabs her. He says he’ll tell them where to send the money. Everything gets a little confused, with people yelling and moving around, and I’m sure Dixon is going to shoot someone, when Sonny jumps up from his chair. He grabs Dixon from behind, throws him to the floor and takes his gun. Go, Sonny!

Everyone scrambles to Nathan. Sonny tells Dixon to get on his knees. He says he’s going to make him pay for threatening his daughter. Carly walks in startled that Sonny is up. Paul and Anna enter. Sonny tells them they’re a little late.

Lulu comes to, choking up water.

Brad tells Lucas that one thing he can say about Lucas’s family is they’re never boring. Anna goes to talk to Sonny and Paul says he has some things to wrap up. Olivia tells Ava she did a brave thing. Paul tells everyone to stay put until they can get statements.

Morgan says he wants to fix things. Andre tells him he needs to fix himself first and Morgan needs to trust him.

Anna tells Sonny not to go anywhere. Carly asks Sonny how long he’s been lying to her about being able to walk. She doesn’t wait for an answer and walks away from him. Carly tells Ava about what happened with Kiki. Ava asks if she’s alive and she sees the blood on Carly’s really nice sweater. Ava starts to leave and Paul tries to stop her. She slaps him one, but for some reason the sound is out of sync with the action, so it comes off looking pretty funny. Ava tells Paul it’s his fault Kiki got shot and storms out.

Carly asks Anna if she can go. Anna says yes, and thanks her for her help with Kiki. Alexis says this shouldn’t have happened and she doesn’t even want to know how Ava is involved. Olivia tells Julian that she’s glad she didn’t bring Leo and this is obviously what her premonition was about. Alexis thanks Sonny for saving Kristina’s life. This is one of those times I actually like Sonny. Alexis asks him what he knows. He says he had nothing to do with it, but I don’t think she believes him.

Nathan arrives at the hospital next. He wakes up babbling about Dixon and Maxie tells him Dixon is in custody. Nathan is wheeled into surgery. Nina tells Franco he’s her hero. He says he’s selfish and a coward and to never think any different. Ava comes in hysterical, looking for Kiki.

Lulu gets brought in next. Dante tells the doctor what happened and they check Lulu for hypothermia.

Morgan wants Michael to check on Kiki. Ava comes in and starts screaming at Morgan. about how it’s his fault. Franco tells her she’s not doing anybody any good and she won’t be able to see Kiki if she doesn’t calm down. Morgan says he’d never hurt Kiki.

Anna thanks Sonny for his help. He says to thank him by bringing the culprits to justice. Everyone is allowed to go home. Jordan says Paul has a habit of not telling her things. Paul admits to Anna that things went awry, but Dixon is in custody and he and Anna make a great team. She calls him an arrogant s.o.b.

Carly goes back to the pier wondering what happened. I’m surprised she’s allowed to wander around there since its a crime scene for a crime that happened five minutes ago. She takes down the police tape and starts throwing the guns in the water. Sonny comes up and asks what she’s doing. She asks why he lied to her.

Anna says is was ill planned and that one person like Morgan should not have been able to cause such chaos. Paul says it was still a success. Anna tells him take all the credit, because she doesn’t want to associate with him anymore.

Alexis tells Julian she knows it wasn’t his fault and that the wedding might have been a disaster, but their kids are all safe and they made it through the vows.

Dante is holding the unconscious Lulu’s hand when she wakes up. She asks how he knew where she was and he says he just knew. This almost brings a tear to my eye.

Ava is in with Kiki. She says nothing was supposed to happen to her. Morgan and Michael stand in the doorway. Michael says Morgan has to go now. Morgan says if she dies it’s his fault.

Carly tells Sonny thanks a lot for letting her grieve while watching him pretend to struggle. Sonny says Morgan has to hit rock bottom before he’d get help. Carly says, well he sure did, and tells him about Morgan stealing his gun and Kiki getting shot. Hmm…Carly seems to be going into a riff on gun control. Sonny tells her that the crates don’t have his name on them, but Jerome Gallery. He says it was necessary and he’d do it again. He says Morgan wasn’t supposed to be a part of it. Carly says the violence was always waiting for him and they made it happen.

Tomorrow, Dante loves Lulu more than ever, Elizabeth apologizes for the millionth time, and Kiki might be paralyzed. In Port Charles, probably not for long.

Side note: When I tuned into Judge Judy early, Dr Phil was still on and had this to say: “My daddy always told me not to miss a damn good chance to shut up.”

Little Women: Atlanta

Disregarding Dr. Phil’s daddy’s wise advice and giving my two cents. If you don’t want to be stereotyped and labeled by things like “midget wrestling,” ladies, please stop getting into fist-fights with one another.

Minnie is still getting over what went down at her birthday party. She’s meeting the Cheeks and Wooda at his studio to go over it again. Minnie says she has to talk to Monie about her getting out of control. They think just because Minnie mended fences with Juicy, Monie thinks she’s being replaced as a friend.

The twins are learning to drive. The instructor has to set up pedal extensions first. Whatever twin isn’t driving, is in the backseat laughing with her boyfriend. When it’s her turn though, she doesn’t do much better. The instructor suggests using two feet. I’m not laughing because I’m not so sure how I’d do in their place.

Minnie comes by Juicy’s house to see if her apology was genuine. Minnie doesn’t want what Monie did to come between them either. She outright asks if Juicy’s apology was sincere. Juicy says she wants to move on and it was from the heart. She says she didn’t come to the party to cause drama. Minnie says she’s missed them hanging out.

Minnie brings up Monie throwing the drink on Juicy. Juicy says Monie is a character and wonders how she and Minnie can be friends. Juicy thinks Monie probably doesn’t have many friends and she’s jealous.

Monie has started her voice-over training. She tells boyfriend Morlen about what happened at the party. He says she needs to watch her temper. Monie says she has an allergy to bs. Why that means she has to get physical, I don’t know. Morlen says the girls should talk things out and come together. Monie wants things the way they used to be.

The twins go bike shopping, since it will be a while before they get their licenses. I’m just short and have a hard time finding a comfortable bike, I can’t imagine what they go through. They have to ride a kid’s bike. I feel their pain.

Andrea is real unhappy with her leech boyfriend. Amanda says if he was going to change, he’d have done it by now. Andrea doesn’t want to let the boyfriend go and thinks they can work things out. Her sister says this is no example for her son.

The Cheeks are having a photo shoot. They talk about the twins getting a job at the club they promote. Emily is worried that she’s starting to show and it might be obvious in the pictures. Yeah, a little bit.

Andrea and boyfriend Chris go out for dinner. No doubt she’s paying. Andrea tries to talk to Chris. She wants him to get a job, and he takes offense to this. She says he wasn’t around when their son had a hospital emergency. He has chronic lung disease and is also a little person. Andrea says the arguing isn’t healthy and Chris says he’ll try his best.

The girls go apple picking. The Cheeks wonder if Minnie forgave Juicy so Juicy wouldn’t continue to gossip about her. Minnie hopes there won’t be any alcohol involved. I don’t think that goes real well with apple picking either.

Minnie talks about how average sized people often disrespect little people, doing things like taking pictures without asking and patting them on the head. Minnie says she’s been torn, a part of her want’s to just move on, but a part of her wants to know what made Monie so angry.

There’s silence between Minnie and Monie, making the start a little awkward. Monie thanks them for coming and yada yada yada. They take a hay wagon to the orchard. I’m not sure why this is suddenly a thing with the Little Women, since it looks like a struggle for a little person to apple pick.

Monie asks Minnie why she got angry when she had Minnie’s back? Minnie says she was being chill and Monie got out of control and had no business throwing a drink on Juicy. Right away, Monie gets angry again, saying that Juicy had it coming. They start getting loud. Monie throws shade at Juicy and Minnie says she’s talking about Monie right now. Monie asks what’s really up with Minnie and Troy, and is there any truth in what Juicy had been saying.

Minnie says she was there to have fun, not for a confrontation. Monie thinks Minnie forgave Juicy too fast. Minnie says she lied and Troy really wasn’t her boyfriend. Monie is all shocked and says Minnie has been making Juicy out to be the bad guy. Does this mean she’ll apologize for that drink throwing?

Minnie says she felt badly being the only single one of the group. She was afraid that they would look at her funny. Monie says they would never do that and Minnie should be honest. Minnie tells the rest of the girls. She asks for no judgment and for them to put themselves in her shoes. Everyone is supportive, but Monie still feels betrayed and wonders what else Minnie might be lying about.

Commercial break. The Mother/Daughter Experiment: Celebrity Edition looks like pure has-been hell. I’ll probably watch it. It also sounds like a board game.

Minnie tells her mother that she lied about Troy. She says the reason her mom hasn’t met Troy is because they’re not in a relationship. She says her friends all have boyfriends. Her mother says that’s no excuse for lying. She brings up what happened with Monie. She says what if it had been worse just because Minnie lied? Minnie apologizes and her mother accepts that, but she tells Minnie to put her big girl panties on.

The twins are out on a bike ride. They talk about what a drag it is riding a kid’s bike, but at least they’re getting around. Then they throw shade at the Cheeks, since they’re first night at the club is tonight.

The Cheeks have a booking at Boogalou, the same club the twins are signed up for. Emily says she has to get some bookings in before she really starts to show.

The twins arrive at the club. Emily and Bri are already there, and Emily is like, not too awkward. She didn’t think they’d be working the same night. This looks like a pretty boring club. Not too many people. Fewer than an eighth grade dance. The twins wait tables while the Cheeks hang out on the swings near the bar. Emily says she didn’t know the club had the twins doing dirty work and generally insults them.

Down on the dance floor, Bri says she doesn’t serve people, she’s an entertainer. One of the twins gets in Emily’s face. Another get’s in Bri’s and they start to hair pull and fight. The people in the club look amused and probably think this is part of the act. Security pulls them apart.

A lone hair extension is left on the dance floor.

Next week, The fight is discussed, Bri wantts to go to counseling with Wooda who thinks she should go on her own, and a music video is filmed.

Important information: The new season of Southern Charm starts April 4.

Little Women: LA

We start with a rip-roaring fight between Terra and Tonya. Then it says five days earlier.

Jasmine knows her husband isn’t happy working at her father’s restaurant. Chris tells her his lack of experience in the restaurant business is frustrating because he doesn’t always get what’s being asked of him. He says he doesn’t want to go out of state for work though, so he’s going to stick with it.

Jasmine wants to host a party for the girls and their dates at the restaurant. If he’s working that night, she wants Chris to join them after his shift. He says it will be awkward, but he’ll roll with it. He seems like a pretty easy-going guy.

Terra and Tonya get together for drinks. They toast to Tonya’s love life. Tonya tells Terra about Kerwin’s visit. In her individual interview, Terra says Penny had decompression surgery recently, and two of her best friends weren’t around, one of them being Tonya. Being a good friend though, Terra listens patiently and asks the appropriate questions. She thinks Tonya will have to stop working with Ja.

Terra asks about Kerwin’s housemate. Terra says in all honesty, she doesn’t see Kerwin and Tonya living together. Tonya insists he’s changed, but Terra says he’s still living with another woman.

Briana and Matt are checking with a fertility specialist. Briana would like a baby with Matt, but it’s not happening and she wants to see if it can happen.

They meet with the doctor. Briana tells her about the pregnancy symptoms she thought she was having, only to find out she wasn’t even ovulating. The doctor wants to do an ultrasound. Briana says those are often painful for little people because a probe has to be used. The doctor points out something on the screen.

Briana has poly-cystic ovaries. Not good news, but Briana is glad it’s not something connected to her being a little person. The doctor says things look good for a future pregnancy.

Elena says the double date with Tonya didn’t go that well. She wants to talk to Tonya about Kerwin. She asks how they left things. Tonya says Kerwin is still mulling things over and Elena says she just doesn’t want to see Tonya get her heart broken.

Elena asks about the couples party. Tonya thinks Jasmine is being rude since she knows Tonya doesn’t have a date right now. Elena thinks she wants to cover up her mistake in not inviting Elena to her mom’s party. Elena says she wants to avoid Jasmine, but not her friends, so she’s going.

Christy and Todd are going to couples counseling. Christy says it hasn’t helped in past relationships, but she’s willing to give it a try with Todd. They tell the therapist about their background, including the frustration about trying to have a child. I’m loving Christy’s beachy wave hairstyle. Christy tells the therapist that she’s okay with Todd being overweight, but she’s afraid of being a window. She’s scared that they’ll adopt a child and he’s going to keel over dead.

She asks Todd not to be angry, and brings up the lap band surgery. He says he’s not a fan, but Christy says that he’s not doing anything else about it either. He makes a promise to do better. In her individual interview, Christy says she’s heard it all before (I know what that’s like), but now that they have a therapist, she feels like she has back up and there’s someone to hold Todd accountable. She says maybe Todd will surprise her and lose the weight this time. Todd says he knows he can do it.

Todd and Christy are looking at another house. It’s really cute, with a huge kitchen. The laundry room appliances are low, and they both love that. Todd says there’s no bigger challenge in life than retrieving that last sock. Christy tells Todd they have to get the house. Christy is feeling very positive and Todd thinks the therapy helped.

Tonya thinks the ladies had some valid points. She SKYPES with Kerwin and asks if he’s making any changes. He hasn’t said anything to the woman he lives with yet, and asks her if she understands the gravity of what she’s asking. Tonya is surprised because he’s always been the one pressuring her to be together. He’d afraid she’s going to change her mind again. She says she wants to work things out and he says he needs to make a decision. Their conversation wears me out.

Jasmine has the restaurant decorated with pinatas for the couples party. Penny is out of the hospital, and Terra says she and Joe need a date night. Chris has to work during the party. Jasmine thought it would be weird, but no one gives a flying. Tonya comes solo. Briana hopes the ladies don’t gang up on her again.

Elena says noting about this is romantic, so why is Jasmine calling it a date night? Tonya is sitting with her and Preston, and she’s miffed too. Tonya says Elena understands her better than Terra. She says she needs support right now, not discouragement.

There’s a taco truck included, and Briana and Christy go outside to check it out. They talk about the last time they clashed and how much both of them were hurt. Christy apologizes and says if Briana wants to apologize for the lies, that’s on her. Somehow this inches toward an argument, but Christy says she won’t feed into it. She apologizes again and says Briana never says “sorry” back. Weren’t we just here? Briana says she’s sorry for not telling Christy she was married and they get tacos. Thank goodness. I felt like I was headed for Groundhog Day.

They’re ready for the pinatas, which have candy and adult goodies in them. Jasmine encourages Elena to play, but she’s being standoffish. Christy takes out her frustrations on the pinata and Jasmine finishes the job. Jasmine asks why Elena doesn’t want to have fun. She asks if something is bothering Elena. Elena says she thought it was going to be a real couples party with candles and stuff, when they’re just hanging out. Jasmine says it was a way of inviting the guys. Jasmine says no matter what she does, she can’t please them. Tonya whines about being single.

Christy chimes in that Jasmine recognized her mistake in not inviting Elena to the last party. Everyone starts yelling at one another. Jasmine says they can either stay and enjoy themselves or they can leave.

Terra thinks Tonya is being ridiculous and that Jasmine doesn’t know every detail of everyone’s lives. Elena says something stupid and Jasmine says Elena hasn’t always been nice to her. Elena brings up the party she wasn’t invited to and Jasmine says she’s apologized a thousand times. Briana says she’d rather be at the bar doing shots with the guys, but at least this isn’t about her for once.

Terra and Tonya really get into it and I have the feeling this isn’t just about Elena and Jasmine anymore. Terra says when Penny was having spinal surgery, she really needed Tonya and she was too busy with Kerwin to bother. Terra asks where Tonya and Elena were when Penny was in the hospital, and tells Tonya not to say she’s always there for her. The three of them start yelling so loud, I can’t understand them. Elena storms out and Tonya says she’s out too.

Next week, either they didn’t give a preview or the world is going to end.