Monthly Archives: April 2017

April 28, 2017 – Life Vs Tracy & a Quad of Quotes

Standard

 What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Tracy packs, putting photos into a case and talking to them, tossing AJ’s picture aside. She’s hitting the road, and taking the painting with her.

We revisit yesterday’s ending. Ned points out Samira to Officer Stick-in-the-Mud. The officer says she’s in the country illegally, but Ned produces a six-month extension on her visa. He tells the officer that his services are no longer required. Glad I didn’t bother learning his actual name.

Tracy brings roses to the crypt for Lila. She says she’s off to the land of sun and fun, and Samira isn’t even a blip on her radar. She tells Edward that for all his criticism, she’s the last one standing. They should have appreciated her. Who cares if she doesn’t meet arbitrary criteria for being a good person? AJ’s plaque falls off the crypt wall and whacks her in the head. She’s down for the count.

Officer Stick-in-the-Mud checks on the visa extension, and says it came from the highest level of government. Ned says he went to boarding school with someone that’s a high official now. Monica tells the officer that if he bothers them again, she’ll have him checking baggage for the TSA. No doubt a more thankless job than the one he has already.

Ned says that the Quartermaine cutthroat instincts are genetic. Samira asks what’s going on. Ned thinks they should finish the discussion at home. It’s time the situation is resolved, but they can’t do that without his mother.

Scotty tells Tracy it’s show time. There’s no putting it off, and she has to wake up. Suddenly, she’s with him, sitting outside a courtroom. She asks why she’s there. Nathan comes out and says she’s next.  Life vs Tracy Angelica Quartermaine is on the case roster next to the door. She walks in, asking what she’s done, and Diane asks what hasn’t she done? She asks if Tracy’s strategy is bewilderment. Scotty tells her it’s ADD and I laugh. Using a TV screen, Diane shows Tracy how she got hit in the head, and says maybe it will jog her memory. Tracy says that explains it; she’s unconscious, and Diane tells her that she’s dead. She asks what Scotty is doing there, and he tells her not to overthink it. Diane says this is where the newly departed are reviewed, and welcome to her judgement day.

Thus begins Tracy’s this-is-your-life retrospective, done through TV, laptop, tablet and phone screens.

Scotty is to present her good deeds, and Diane, her bad ones. If the good outweighs the bad, she ascends; if not, she’s reincarnated. Diane mentions that Skye Chandler is going to be pregnant soon. <snort> Tracy is concerned about Scotty being her counsel, but he tells her Lorenzo Alcazar was supposed to be poodle, and he got him out of it.

The judge enters. It’s Sonny. He gives a dimply smile from the bench.

Sonny calls the court to order. Tracy demands a mistrial. She says she wasn’t ready to die, and they all laugh. She says the judge is biased. We flash back to when she, Sonny, and I were babies, and she’s trying to get money from him. He talks about what she did to Lois, and how Lois didn’t deserve the shaft. On the bench, Sonny says he forgot about that. We all did. It was like, 30 years ago. Diane tells Tracy that the entirety of her life is going to be evidence. Scotty says Sonny is biased, but Sonny tells him the only other judge available is Anthony Zacchara, and Tracy is suddenly okay with Sonny.

Back in the real world, Kiki tells Dillon she had no idea Ned was a shark. Dillon says he’s a great white, and like a gunslinger who gave it up to be a farmer. Samira sees that the painting is gone. Monica says three guesses who took it.

Diane tells Tracy that she squandered her latest life. She’s incapable of goodness, and must be sent back. Scotty says good is relative. She’s not Heather Webber bad, but compared to her father, she seems fine. Diane says even Edward wasn’t as cruel with his words as Tracy has been. She takes us back to Alan telling Tracy that Monica is fooling around with Ned. Tracy says Alan blames others for not being able to hang on to his wife, when she’s not worth hanging on to. We move on to an argument between Monica and Tracy, see Tracy talking about Jenny to Lila, and insulting various other people. She says, for this she’s risking being Skye Chandler’s baby? Diane says let’s move on to deeds.

Tracy tells Scotty to object, but he says there’s nothing to object to. Tracy says she’s afraid of coming back as a flatworm. Scotty says the prosecution has painted his client as a heartless shrew, and thinks they should move on to her conquests. Tracy says they weren’t all bad, but Diane says her relationships haven’t furthered her personal growth. Scotty says there is a man who has inspired fulfillment and growth in her life, but it sickens him to say the name – Luke Spencer. Diane says he tricked Tracy into a fraudulent marriage, but Tracy says it turned into something else. We see a sweet scene between them, where he tells her that he loves her. Scotty says she had a real, honest love with Luke. Diane says until she couldn’t trust him, and we see Tracy telling Luke to take a hike, calling him a fractured, pathetic loser, who she’ll enjoy seeing beg to get her back. Diane says that was the end of that. Tracy tells Scotty that he’s fired.

Kiki says maybe there’s another explanation for the missing painting. Ned joins them, and asks what Tracy has done now. Dillon says she’s disappeared and taken the painting.

Tracy says that Scotty hung her immortal soul on her romantic interests. She wants Sonny to consider one of the good things she’s done. Saving Luke’s life counts, but she also gave birth to two children. We look back to when Tracy was pregnant. She says Dillon and Ned are proof she did something right. She learned to use her strength to give comfort and guidance to the Quartermaines. Diane says, until she didn’t. We see Tracy and Alan having an altercation. He tells her she’d better not ruin Monica’s party or embarrass them. Tracy asks Diane if she’s kidding. Dinner party shenanigans? Diane says that’s just a warm up. We see Tracy with Jenny in the hospital, and Edward telling her to pack her bags. The original Edward, David Lewis. Next, baby Ned tells her she has a pathetic record as a mother. She’s able to erase the rotten things she’s done to him, and she cares about only one thing in this life – herself. Omg, everyone is so young in these clips.

We see Tracy apologizing for being a disappointment to Lila, who says she never wants Tracy to go through this kind of pain again. Diane says that’s not the worst of it.

Tracy suggests they wrap it up, but Sonny says all the relevant facts have to be presented. Tracy says she runs from this memory every day and doesn’t need to see it. I’ve already guessed what it is. Edward is about to sign his changed will. (I’m right.) He says she’d do anything to get her hands on the trust fund, including go against his direct orders. He tells her that it proves she no longer loves him; if she did to begin with. He says he’s no longer her father. She says that he’s the only one who ever mattered, and he tells her to prove it, but starts to choke. He asks her to get his medication, and she just looks at him. She says then he can live long enough to sign the will; she’ll have to think about it. She tells him that all Quartermaines love each other, but there’s one thing they love more – money. She learned it at his knee – never count on people, only on money. She asks him to tear up the will as he struggles. If he tears it up, she’ll give him the medication. He keels over. Back in the courtroom, Tracy says, enough.

Tracy is alone with a spotlight on her. She says she was selfish and greedy, but then why did her family take her back? She knows she’s done good, and can do more; she can prove it. Don’t send her back as Skye’s baby or a flatworm. Send her back as her.

Ned says Tracy ordered the jet fueled and a flight plan mapped, but he’s canceled the flight. He tells them not to write Tracy off just yet. She could surprise them.

Tracy tells her father that he wins; she gives up. She knows he’s there pulling the strings and having the last word. Judge Sonny was a nice touch. She says he never forgave her, but she never forgave herself either. All she wanted was to please him and make him proud of her. She wonders what her life would have been like if she’d just been herself. Would she have made herself proud? If she only had one last chance…

Tracy opens her eyes in the crypt. She hears something moving in Edwards crypt.

Kiki asks if Tracy has a “find my family” app, and Monica says Tracy doesn’t want her family to find her. Dillon tells them that they don’t need the painting to help Samira; maybe it’s time they spent their money on something worthwhile. Samira says the monks already have buyer for painting. Dillon can’t imagine Tracy coming back with it. Tracy walks in, saying his imagination is in for a surprise. She knows what they’re thinking, and they’re not wrong. She was taking off with the painting, but recent events caused her to reevaluate things. She’s been extraordinarily blessed, and it’s time to use her gifts to help others. She values the painting, but Samira needs it more. Ned asks if she’s sure, and Dillon tells him to shut up; Tracy is having a generous impulse. Tracy says she has to start somewhere, and she’s giving up the painting. Everyone smiles, and hearts are warmed all over Soapland.

This was a wonderful retrospective, and a beautiful (early) send-off for Jane Elliot. I couldn’t help wishing they’d done the same for Anthony Geary when he left so uneventfully. Jane says she’s retiring from acting, and wants to put her energy into some other things, but I’m glad they left the door open. At least I think they did. We still have a few days to go. Her last air date is May 4th.

On Monday, the DNA test results are in, Nelle thinks Nina should be honest and talk to Valentin, and Valentin asks if Anna is all right.

Quotes of the Week

Don’t try so hard to fit in, and certainly don’t try so hard to be different… just try hard to be you. Zendaya Coleman

She’s transitioning. So are we. – a guest on Dr. Phil who is related to a trans woman and has a very valid point.

Being a New Yorker is always knowing where the nearest weapon is. – Me, while watching a woman in jep Lifetime movie

Stay evil, dollface. Spread the word. — Deadshot (Will Smith), Suicide Squad

General-Hospital-spoilers-1

 

 

April 27, 2017 – ICE Nails Samira, Small Chef Memories & the Debut of John Gray

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Jason and Jake do some drawing. Jason says Jake is talented and must have gotten it from his mom. Jason puts Jake in a wrestling hold, and Jake says he can’t breathe. Jason tightens the hold. And then wakes up.

Jake has a temperature. Did Elizabeth just say it’s 110? He doesn’t look like he’s in a coma or dead. Franco comes to visit, and Elizabeth sends Jake back upstairs. She says he’s been up all night and doesn’t want to go to school. She’s concerned. She did say 110, so I guess Jake is faking it. Or he’s an incredibly hardy child.

Samira tries to get out of the hospital bed, and Kiki tells her she has to be cleared to leave, and that she can’t help Sadika if she’s sick. Samira asks if Kiki’s ever had someone she’d like to save, and Kiki tells her to get dressed.

Monica tells Laura that Samira will be better when Tracy coughs up the painting.

Tracy talks to her father’s photograph, and tells him that the journal was dry as dust. He seemed lonely; like his life was pointless without his family. She ponders how many hours he spent staring at Lila’s picture, or if he was frolicking with Samira’s mother. She wonders if it was all a set up for the cruelest double-cross of all. Dillon walks in and asks if she’s talking to Edward’s picture.

On the phone, Sonny asks if they can make it sooner. The pills might be the missing link in his son’s death. Ava rings the doorbell.

At the MetroCourt, Diane tells Alexis she’s not being charged. Carly walks out, and Diane says sorry, but Sonny already retained her services for the divorce. She hopes they can come to an equitable agreement. Carly asks Alexis if she’s available, because Carly is waaay out of that loop.

Samira tells Kiki that she has to go back; maybe the brothers will have another idea. She begged Tracy, but she won’t let the painting go. Samira thinks she should offer to take her daughter’s place. Because human traffickers are easy to haggle with.

Dillon asks Tracy if Edward is talking back, and Tracy says he’s wondering when Dillon is going to join the family business. She says there’s no reason to stop sparring with Edward now. Dillon tells her that when she’s ready to talk to a live person, he’s the guy. She asks if he thinks she’s a bad person if she doesn’t give up the painting.

Ava says she has something to talk to Sonny about. She asks if Lucy is shaking him and Carly down for donations. Sonny says she hasn’t bothered him, but he doesn’t know about Carly. Ava says she’d like to discuss Avery’s preschool, and asks if Carly is there.

Diane says she’s sorry for Carly and Sonny’s troubles, but thinks when the smoke clears, they can put it behind them. Carly says Sonny has pushed her too hard, and this time she’s pushing back. Diane says duly noted.

Elizabeth tells Franco about letting Jason know that he thought Jake was afraid of him. She says Jake said that’s not it, but it’s halfway right. Jake is afraid of the man Jason used to be.

Jason says he couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to wake Sam, so he stayed on the couch. Sam says she could tell something was off; he didn’t even eat dinner. She asks what’s going on, and if it has to do with Jake. He says Jake is afraid of him. Not so much who he is now, but who he used to be.

Sonny tells Ava to let him know what preschool she likes, and he’ll see if they agree. Diane breezes in and says apparently, a storm is brewing. Sonny says Ava was just leaving.

Alexis asks if Carly is sure she wants to do this. Carly tells her about Sonny having Jax deported permanently. He has sensitive information on Jax, and thinks he’s punishing Carly, but he’s really punishing Josslyn. She says he doesn’t care who he hurts, and this time, she’s done. Alexis says she was busy with her downward spiral, but Kristina filled her in, and she’s sorry. She tells Carly that she doesn’t have her license back yet. Carly asks if she can be Alexis’s first client, but Alexis says it could take months. Carly says she’d be willing to wait, but Sonny won’t, so Alexis recommends another lawyer (Nora?).

Kiki tells Samira that she’s taken risks that are stupid, but she’s learned not to act out of fear. She says the Quartermaines are difficult, but they have good hearts and money, and she should give them another chance. Kiki says if Dillon is on her side, she’ll be okay.

Monica tells Laura that only the people who admitted her know Samira is there. She says Tracy has offered to cover the medical expenses, and isn’t that nice? Laura can tell Monica isn’t happy with Tracy, but says since her father died, Tracy has changed. Monica says it’s a big test, and so far, she’s failing. Laura says she has faith that Tracy will do the right thing in the end. Monica tells her not to hold her breath.

Dillon says that Tracy knows how he feels about Samira’s situation, but he also understands how Tracy feels. He says Edward wasn’t there for her when he was alive, so what makes her think he’ll be there for her now? He tells Edwards’s picture that his way of loving sucks, and tells Tracy he’ll always love her, even if she disappoints him. She asks if it would disappoint him if she doesn’t give up the painting. He says it would, but she’s stuck with him. The Quartermaines aren’t he nicest people, and incapable of expressing emotion, but it doesn’t mean they can’t feel love and loyalty. If they stick together, it will be okay. Tracy says that’s what family does. Dillon tells her that their numbers are dwindling, and they can’t afford not to. He leaves, and Tracy smiles at the picture.

Tracy asks if Edward heard that. Dillon won’t kick her to the curb, and is being her support system. Laura appears, saying too bad Samira doesn’t have one. Tracy wonders who keeps letting random people in. Laura says she spoke to Robert, and human trafficking in Turkey is on the rise, especially with refugees. Tracy says that’s not her problem, but Laura asks if it will be if Samira is her sister?

Kiki tells Monica that Samira is getting restless. Monica says who wouldn’t be, waiting on Tracy. Officer Stick-in-the-Mud walks in, and says he needs to talk to Monica; they can have a discussion here or at the station. Kiki asks if he has any paperwork, and Monica explains that he’s there investigating an enemy of the state. He says it’s an expired visa. Monica stands corrected, and gives Kiki the papers to get “the patient” released. Kiki asks if she should call legal counsel, but Monica says no. The officer asks why Monica lied to him. Kiki tells Samira they have to get her out of there stat.

Elizabeth explains to Franco how Jake shut down when they saw the picture. Franco thinks it’s odd, since Jake knows he’s the same person. Elizabeth says he does conceptually, but he’s still a little kid. She tells him that Jason has no memory of the island. Franco says it’s good; it’s a starting point. It’s time to start considering that Jake was traumatized by something he saw or something the old Jason did.

Jason tells Sam about what happened when Jake saw the photo. Sam says Jake is a child who’s seen a lot of trauma and has a lot of challenges. Jason asks what if he hurt Jake? Sam says what if he didn’t, and that it all comes back to Helena. Jason wonders what if it doesn’t? Scout cries, and Sam goes upstairs, leaving Jason to ponder things.

Monica says she didn’t let Officer Stick-in-the-Mud interrupt her busy day to insult her. He says when he first questioned her, she said she didn’t know Samira. Monica says that’s wrong; she said Samira wouldn’t be found in her house, and he calls semantics. She tells him to produce evidence to the contrary or go. He shows her a picture of Samira in her living room.

Kiki asks Dillon if they can take Samira back to the estate, but he doesn’t think she’ll be any safer there.

Laura says that Tracy has turned painting into physical manifestation of her father. Tracy says it meant a lot to have his love and forgiveness. She asks Laura, what if he wasn’t the man she thought he was?

Elizabeth tells Franco that they’re reading a lot between the lines. She says Jason could never hurt a child. Franco says he wasn’t aware of his actions when he planted the bomb on The Haunted Star, and maybe the same thing applies – he wasn’t acting of his own free will. Elizabeth says it won’t help Jake to pursue that avenue. Using soap opera timing, Jake appears and says, help him what?

Jason asks why Jake would be afraid if he hadn’t hurt him. Sam thinks Helena’s attempt to control their lives continues on. She wanted to create chaos and succeeded. Jason wonders what he did. Sam says they can’t change what happened; all they can do is help Jake move forward. Jason wants to know what Helena did to him.

Ava sees Alexis and Carly. Alexis says that’s her cue, and starts to leave. Ava tries to talk to her about Julian, but she’s not having it. Ava asks Carly if it’s too early to have a glass of champagne to toast the divorce.

Diane tells Sonny that Carly is going to make the divorce as miserable as possible. She would have advised against what he did to Jax. He has to remember that Jax is Josslyn’s father, and Carly is going to retaliate. Sonny says Carly can leave with what she came with, and nothing else. Idiot. Diane tells him not to be so sure.

Laura thinks Tracy knew Edward the best, except for Lila. Tracy says what if the man she tried to please was running around on her mother? If Samira is his daughter, the time and energy she put into the relationship was wasted. Either he was a good man with flaws or a callous bastard. Either the painting is declaration of love or the most highly valued thing he gave her. Either way, she’s not giving it up.

Kiki tells Dillon to get scrubs and a wheelchair, and pray they don’t get caught.

Monica asks if the officer was spying. He says a concerned party was worried about Samira’s presence. He’s willing to overlook it if she tells him where Samira is hiding. If not, he’ll have no choice but to arrest her.

Jason tells Sam no offense to Andre, but he doesn’t know Helena’s capabilities. He thinks there’s another way without involving Jake. Maybe the book Helena gave Jake has the answers.

Jake wants pancakes. Elizabeth wonders how he could be into pancakes with a 110 temperature, but goes into the kitchen. Jake asks if Franco wants to color, since he got some new crayons. Franco sees 0705 on the timeline, and asks what it means. Suddenly Jake doesn’t feel good, and goes back upstairs. Franco looks at the timeline and gives us a soap opera face.

Monica says she doesn’t know the woman in the photo. Officer Stick-in-the-Mud says he’ll find Samira, with or without her help. She asks him to come into her office, and he tells her to do the right thing. She wonders what the right thing is, and says she’s getting tired of the witch hunt. In the meantime, Ned comes out of the elevator, running into Dillon and Kiki trying to get Samira out. Monica claims the photo was photoshopped, but the officer tells her she’s under arrest. Ned says that won’t be necessary. He says Samira is right there, and points to her. Monica asks if he knows what he’s done, and he says he does. Not sure what Ned is up to here.

Laura tells Tracy that the painting is just a painting, and if Edward strayed, it doesn’t mean he didn’t love Lila. Tracy says maybe he didn’t deserve Lila, but Laura says he made her happy, and they were a good balance. She tells Tracy that if she wants to honor them, to follow in their footsteps and be compassionate and generous, a legacy to be proud of.

Ava says now that Carly and Sonny are divorcing, Carly is out of Avery’s life. No marriage, no baby Avery. Carly says Avery isn’t one of their irreconcilable differences. They both love her and want what’s best for her. She tells Ava that if she pushes her, she’ll be the one out of Avery’s life.

Diane shows Sonny the trusts he set up when he thought he might go to prison, and the remainder of his assets that he signed over to Carly. He says it was in case he got convicted, but Diane says no provision was made to transfer it back when that didn’t happen. They’re still in Carly’s name. He says he’ll talk to her. She tells him to go easy; Carly holds the cards. He’s the one who may have to live outside the country to avoid federal difficulties.

Carly calls the attorney. She says she’s divorcing her husband, and wants everything. Doesn’t everyone in that position? Good luck with that.

Jason tells Elizabeth that Helena liked riddles and puzzles. He thinks the answer might be in the book. Elizabeth shows him the number on the timeline, and asks if it means anything

Alexis shows up at Sam’s place, and Sam tells her that she and Jason are pursuing different avenues regarding Jake. She thinks she has to go to Cassadine Island, and Alexis is like, no way.

Jason says it could be a date. Franco says that it would be the European way of putting the day before the month. Jason wonders what May 7th means, and Elizabeth says it’s Jake’s birthday.

Tomorrow, a special Tracy retrospective. While telling Edward she’s going off for fun in the sun, Tracy gets clobbered by a plaque falling off the wall in the family crypt.

🍱 Tonight, MasterChef Junior gave us a nostalgic trip through past seasons, so there was everything from astronauts to elves to that cute, tiny girl with the big hair bow. I might have had kids if I could have been guaranteed that one. I love a trip down Memory Lane, and wish I could have paid more attention, but a friend called and I didn’t think I could blow them off by saying I needed to watch things I’d already seen. I might give it another look over the weekend On Demand.

⛪ I checked out an episode of The Book of John Gray (OWN) and really enjoyed it. He’s the associate pastor of Houston’s Lakewood Church, under Pastor Joel Osteen. It was both pleasant and entertaining. John is a very funny guy. It was a nice balance of Gray’s church and home life. Although I may or may not be a steady viewer, it gets a thumbs up from me.

April 26, 2017 – Anna Sets a Trap, Ramona Has a Dinner & a Coupla Returns

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Ava and Kiki have dinner at The Floating Rib. Ava is proud of Kiki turning her life around. She likes the sound of Dr. Jerome, but Kiki tells her not to get ahead of things. Ava suggests Dillon come with them next time. Kiki wonders why Ava is in such a good mood, and what her secret is for getting over a bad experience so quickly. She asks if there’s a magic pill, and Ava says there are no pills that can help or harm her. Which is a really bizarre statement.

Bobbie runs into Sonny at the hospital. She asks if they should address the elephant in the room. He tells her if she has something to say, have at it. She tells him that having Jax arrested and deported was the worst mistake he could have made. Carly is on the warpath, and he has no one to blame except himself. Frankly, I think everyone is getting too old for this nonsense.

Michael discusses business on the phone. Carly brings beer and hot dogs from Josslyn, and tells him she said he’s the only normal person in the family. She also tells him that Jax has left the building.

Nelle wants to put her mistakes behind her. Nina says her job description just expanded; she’s adding covert operations. Nina wants her to spy on Valentin.

Valentin tells Anna that whatever was between them is over, and she owes him nothing. Anna says she owes him her life. I’m hating Anna right now.

Ava asks Kiki about her job. Kiki says she has a lot to learn, but it’s helping with her studies. She feels like she’s doing something that matters. Ava hopes it doesn’t bring back any bad memories. Kiki says she wants to help people who are dealing with the same illness that Morgan did. She says it’s not all work though; they’re gearing up for the Nurses Ball. Ava asks if she’s performing with Dillon again, and reminds Kiki that it was the first time she and Dillon kissed. Kiki talks about Morgan seeing them, and wishes she could have explained. Ava says everything worked out, and Kiki asks if they should pretend Morgan never existed.

Bobbie tells Sonny that his and Carly’s anger doesn’t affect just the two of them, and it especially affects their children. She says it does no good for them to punish each other. She thinks they should take a step back. They love each other and are grieving. Whatever went wrong, the real problem is that they’ve lost Morgan.

Carly tells Michael about Sonny turning Jax in, and how he had to go back home. She says he’s no longer allowed in the country, and she underestimated Sonny. Michael says Jax isn’t helpless. It will take some time, but he’ll reach an agreement and be able to return. In the meantime, Josslyn can meet him in Mexico or Canada. Carly says he’s acting like it’s not a big deal. He says the last thing she should be doing is getting back at Sonny. She says she won’t do anything he doesn’t deserve. Yep. A lotta leeway there.

Nelle thought Nina and Valentin were solid. Nina says he’s complicated, and likes to keep secrets. She just wants to be kept in the loop. Nelle thinks she should talk to him. The worst thing she could do is assume something and have it eat away at her; she’ll do things she’ll regret.

Griff asks Andre for a quick word. He asks if Andre is aware of Anna having blood cancer, and if she’s told him about receiving treatment outside of GH. Andre is surprised, and Griff wonders if Anna is hiding something.

Valentin tells Anna, apology accepted. She says he saved her from serious complications, and she got a diagnosis. She says she pretends she doesn’t have cancer a lot of the time, but discovered that she’s not indestructible. He says it’s not like she has to go through it alone. She tells him that it’s opened her eyes to her own imperfections, and how blind she was to the real him. He asks if it’s the one she didn’t want to kiss or the one she slept with? She says he endured all the operations and pain, so that he was the same on the outside as he’s been on the inside – tall, straight, and strong. Bleh.

Griff tells Andre that he tried to talk to Anna, but she puts walls up. He says it seems like Valentin has shaken her to the core. Lucy interrupts, saying she’s found two of Port Charles’s most eligible bachelors. She asks them to sign up to perform at the Nurses Ball, and they suddenly have other things to do. Lucy asks them to think about it. Andre pushes her out the door, but Lucy accosts Griff in the hallway. She gets a call, and he runs for his life.

Kiki is annoyed, and Ava says she didn’t mean they should forget Morgan; she just doesn’t want Kiki to be sad. She admires Kiki for the work she’s doing. They hug.

Carly tells Michael that she almost said yes to Jax when he asked her to come with him. Michael asks why she didn’t. Taking time away from Port Charles might do her some good, and she could take things slow. He says just because Sonny is spiraling out of control, doesn’t mean she has to. She says she can’t leave him right now. He asks if it’s because he’s in the same town as Nelle. Carly asks why he’s even thinking about Nelle.

Nina tells Nelle she’s right. Getting other people involved will just complicate things. She suggests they have a girl’s night out.

Sonny tells Bobbie that they haven’t been able to put the pieces back together. She says it can be almost impossible to come to terms with a senseless loss. He says that he has questions, and he’s not stopping until he gets answers. Lucy interrupts. She wants to finalize the donation from Sonny. She sees the bottle of pills in his hand, and it startles her. He asks if something is wrong. Please. These bottles all look the same, and Sonny is on medication. Why would this be so surprising?

Kiki tells Ava that next time, dinner will be on her. Ava says she can be whatever she wants to be, including a smash hit at the Nurses Ball. She says it would be fun to see both of their names in the program. Kiki asks if she’s performing, and she explains that she donated a piece of art that’s worth a lot.

Bobbie asks Lucy if something is wrong. Lucy says it just occurred to her that maybe Sonny doesn’t want to go to the Nurses Ball this year. If that’s the case, she apologizes. He says Morgan was named after Stone, and it’s important, so he’ll be doing the usual. Lucy says there’s something she needs to tell him.

Carly says she understands Nelle in a way that Michael never will. She tells him that when she first got to Port Charles, she met Jason. She was a mess, lying and cheating all over the place. You’d think she would have liked having someone who didn’t judge her, but she ended up sleeping with Jason’s best friend. She couldn’t get out of her own way, and the only way to recognize love was to test it. Jason is her best friend, but doesn’t love her the same way anymore. Nelle is like she was. She’ll destroy whatever she loves. She’ll test Michael until she breaks his heart, and she can’t let that happen. He thanks her for the take-out, and she says that’s his way of telling her he’s doing what he wants. She says she’ll never stop being his mom. He says he’s glad to hear it, but probably not.

Anna tries to talk Valentin into a glass of champagne. She quotes Churchill, and Valentin says how can he say no? He wanders around. His phone rings; it’s Nina. She asks where he is. He says his errand turned out to be more complicated than he thought. Anna makes a sound, and Valentin says he’s losing the connection.

Sonny asks Lucy if it can wait, and she says sure. Andre comes by, and Sonny goes off with him. Lucy wonders why they’d be meeting, and Bobbie says it’s none of their business. She says they’re both trying to make sense of Morgan’s death, and Sonny’s not quitting until he gets answers.

Griff sees Kiki and Ava at the restaurant. They make small talk about Kiki’s job. She jets, and Griff says she took the loss of a loved one and made something positive about it. Ava says she didn’t realize Kiki’s surgeon was a priest, and Griff says he tries not to advertise it, since people tend to want to confess.

Sonny tells Andre about the pills. He wants to find out why they were there and who had them, and maybe it will explain more about his death. He wants to know why Morgan went so out of control. He spills the pills onto the desk and says they’re the answer.

Valentin wants to leave, but Anna insists on one toast. She promises there’s nothing in the glass but expensive champagne. She asks if he remembers what they used to say at the Academy, and Valentin says, “Some drink for God and country, but we drink to us.”

Carly runs into Nelle and Nina. She tells Nina that Nelle is still making life uncomfortable for people. Nina says everyone deserves a second chance. Carly says what about the people who Nelle hurt? Nelle says she’ll take a raincheck, but Nina says no. Carly says Nelle didn’t tell her everything.

Anna pours more champagne, and Valentin tells her take it easy, since she’s on blood thinners. She says maybe they can think of it as a new beginning. He starts to leave, and she tries to give him the watch back.

Andre tells Sonny that the number of pills is consistent with Morgan taking them. Sonny said he didn’t think he’d lie in his own diary. Andre says he’d wondered if Morgan was taking something else that reacted badly with the prescribed meds. Sonny says without an autopsy, they can’t know for sure. He wonders if the pharmacy screwed something up. He wants to know why his son died.

Ava says Griff can take the night off; she has nothing to confess. Not that she hasn’t made mistakes. She says she’s sure he’s heard terrible things about her past, and it’s probably true. She quotes the Bible, saying there’s no sin too great to be forgiven, and Griff says he’d be out of a job if there was. He asks if there’s something on her mind.

Lucy wonders what kind of answers Sonny wants. Bobbie asks if it’s entertainment for her. Lucy says she feels horrible, and she gets no pleasure out of the tragedy. She just thought she could help. Bobbie asks if she has a magic wand, and Lucy says what if she did? Kiki interrupts – the theme of the day – and tells Lucy good going, getting Ava to make the sculpture donation.

Ava tells Griff that he came there for ribs, not someone bearing their soul. He says it doesn’t have to be in church. He’s sure there have been plenty of confessions on barstools. She asks if she can buy him a drink and orders two martinis. They sit at the bar.

Sonny thanks Andre. He’s going to send Morgan’s pill to the recommended lab. Andre says he thinks it will give Sonny peace of mind. Sonny doesn’t know if that’s possible, but he’ll settle for justice. In the hallway, Kiki overhears.

Michael talks business on the phone. He says sometimes you have to cut your losses. He looks at Nelle’s number on his phone.

Carly tells Nina that Nelle never actually slept with Sonny. She drugged him and lied. She tells Nina proceed at her own risk.

Valentin tells Anna that he can’t take the watch. Anna says she guesses it was just wishful thinking. She needs to feel that something that is irreparably broken can be fixed. He says if it means that much he’ll take it. She puts it on his wrist and thanks him looking at him all creepy. He leaves, and I wish he’d smash it.

Anna drinks more champagne and smiles. If I don’t find out that Valentin has done something astonishingly awful, she is pure evil.

Nelle says there’s nothing Nina can say that she hasn’t said to herself. She knows she’s not wanted. Nina says that she’s going to take advantage of Nelle’s extracurricular talents. She’s going to spy on Valentin. And knowing him, Nelle had better be damn good at it.

Tomorrow, Elizabeth tells Franco that it’s not Jason who’s scaring Jake, Laura thinks Tracy will do the right thing, and Carly asks Alexis to represent her in the divorce. Um…she has no license.

The Real Housewives of New York City

It’s time for Ramona’s dinner party. Tinsley is nervous to meet Dorinda. She’s worried that if she likes Dorinda, Sonja will be mad at her. Because we’re in middle school. In her interview, Dorinda thinks Tinsley isn’t paying rent to Sonja in Benjamins, but paying in other ways. Tinsley talks about her arrest. Dorinda says there isn’t anyone in the room who hasn’t screwed up. In her interview, Tinsley says she likes to get the elephant out of the room right away.

Carole tells Sonja that she missed a fun dinner – that ended very abruptly – explaining how Ramona brought up Bethenny’s not-that-sordid past, under the guise of being concerned about her daughter. Sonja doesn’t think it’s a big deal, and we flash back to some of Sonja’s stage performances. Luann tells Tinsley how she had a better room when she stayed with Sonja. Luann asks Carole about the election party. Carole thinks Ramona doesn’t really want to come, and I translate that to Carole doesn’t want her to come.

Dinner is served. Dorinda says Ramona is a great cook, but she’s not buying that Ramona cooked what they’re eating. They talk about their housing situations, and in her interview, Sonja talks about how Ramona rescinded her invitation to stay over. Sonja tells Dorinda that she looks gorgeous, and Dorinda responds by telling Sonja to quit talking smack about her. Dorinda tells Sonja to shut her mouth, and calls her private parts The Holland Tunnel. Holy! Luann tells Dorinda to calm down. Carole laughs into her linguine. Ramona was hoping that Dorinda would wait at least until desert, or (God forbid) do it privately. Dorinda brings up the stripper at Luann’s shower, and asks if Sonja had a good time. Tinsley says she doesn’t know the history, and tries to say that Sonja wanted to smooth things over, but Dorinda won’t have it.

Luann decides to jump in, saying a blogger wrote that Sonja wouldn’t be caught dead at her wedding. Sonja says she wouldn’t miss it, but had planned her vacation long ago. Dorinda says you need an invitation to go to a wedding, and you can’t go to something you’re not invited to. In her interview, Carole tells us that this is Dorinda on Diet Coke, and we can just imagine had the martinis been flowing. She says Dorinda has a valid point, but it gets lost in the delivery. Sonja suggests Luann talk to her rather than reading the newspaper.

Some dude tries to stop it from getting out of control by proposing a toast. Carole says may the best woman win the election. Dorinda brings up Sonja having worked for Donald Trump, and starts insulting her about some other things. Tinsley thinks it’s the wrong place to have this conversation, and Dorinda calls Sonja a liar and a fraud, and starts hopping around. She says some oddball stuff, and makes references to Grey Gardens. She leaves the room, and another guest thinks it was mean and unnecessary. Carole brings up that Sonja was quoted in yesterday’s paper, and ties the whole thing to Sonja not being invited to the Berkshires. In her interview, Tinsley says they were both hurt, but she doesn’t think it was as one-sided as Sonja presented it. Bethenny calls Carole. She’s there to pick Carole up, and can hear the screaming all the way to the car. She says she’s like Joe Pesci in Home Alone, sitting in the van, eavesdropping.

Sonja gets up, and Dorinda starts to follow her, but wisely sits down. Tinsley says they’re just yelling and not giving Sonja a chance. In the kitchen, Sonja tells Ramona that Dorinda needs to calm down. Ramona thinks they should hash everything out. Carole asks Bethenny to wait ten minutes. She doesn’t want to stay – it’s literally a nuthouse – but she wants to talk to Ramona. Bethenny say this is the best decision she ever made, and the best party she’s ever attended.

Carole tells Ramona she doesn’t think that she should come to the election party, because she doesn’t want drama. In her interview, Carole says it’s not that Ramona is voting for Trump, but she acts like a know-it-all when she doesn’t know anything. Ramona says they’re a bunch of fakes. Dorinda still won’t shut up about Sonja. Carole sneaks out. Ramona brings out a birthday cake for the November babies, which was supposed to include Bethenny, and Sonja blows out the candles.

Luann hosts a brunch. Candace Bushnell, who was also at Ramona’s dinner, is a guest. I’m wondering how she got caught up with this crowd. Dorinda is feeling relieved, and like she’s given birth. She points out that there are cider donuts. I’d never heard of these before, and a neighbor gave me some last Christmas. They were incredible, and I ate them like they were the last donuts on earth. In her interview, Dorinda says that she’s not a grudge-holder, and life is too short. Apparently not for a ceaseless tirade. Ramona gripes about Carole disinviting her to the party, and thinks Bethenny should have shown up at the dinner. Dorinda says it takes a long time for her to get to that point. There was no gently talking to her.

Sonja and Tinsley walk to Luann’s. In her interview, Sonja thinks Dorinda didn’t mean everything she said, and half of it didn’t make sense. Dorinda talks about a middle-aged woman living in the past being unattractive. Ramona asks if she likes Tinsley, and she says she does. The girls arrive. Dorinda and Sonja hug. Sonja says she feels good because they’ve both gotten out what they need to. In her interview, Tinsley says she guesses this is how they do it. Everyone is happy for the moment.

Luann announces that this is a breakfast/brunch/renovation party, and gives them a  tour of the addition. Sonja says she’s happy for Luann, and tells her to let things slide. In her interview, Luann says she has a hard time believing this will last. Me too. They watch the ducks go by on the water. Tinsley and Luann talk on the deck. Sonja tells Ramona that she was invited to the wedding, and in her interview, Ramona says Sonja likes to make things up. We know. Luann toasts to happiness and friendship, and suggests zipping it when someone comes toward any of them with a microphone.

Back in the city, Tinsley meets Dorinda for dinner. She says it’s been difficult connecting with her old friends. Luann joins them, and she and Dorinda are dressed the same. Dorinda wants to do something special for Ramona’s 60th birthday. We flash back to her birthday lunch last year. She says the biggest problem with planning the party is everyone keeping their mouths shut. I’ll bet. I had lunch with a birthday girl the same day as her surprise party, and I almost said, “See you later,” when we parted company. Tinsley wants to make sure there are no issues with her being friends with Sonja, who she didn’t tell about the dinner. Dorinda thinks she’s brave. She says Sonja can be jealous and holds grudges.

Sonja speaks to Frenchie (Edgar), the new man in her life. They plan to meet in an hour. In her interview, Sonja says he’s smart, romantic and all good things; possibly too good to be true. She goes through her underwear, wondering what’s best to watch a movie in.

Luann talks about planning Tom’s birthday. Tinsley talks about getting arrested, and how it gets expunged from her record after a certain amount of time. Dorinda admits you do crazy things when you’re in love. In her interview, she says that love and hate mixed with jealousy and alcohol is a bad combination. They discuss Tinsley’s mug shot, and toast to reinventing yourself.

Dorinda brings lunch to John at work. She tells us they’ve been dating four and a half years, and they’re happy. We learn that John has lost weight and his blood pressure is down. Dorinda says John is gun-shy, since he doesn’t have a great track record with the ladies. She talks about Hannah moving out. Since she has a rule about not having sleepovers with kids around if you’re not married, this is exciting for John. I usually give John a “bleh,” but he seems almost tolerable.

Carole has two kittens and a dog, all named Baby. Bethenny says the creative juices are flowing, and Carole can write a novel, but can’t come up with three names for her pets. Carole says she and Adam are “shacking up.” Carole doesn’t want to look at it as living together, because it’s too serious. Adam is planning on getting his own place eventually. She asks about suckerfish Jason Hoppy, and Bethenny says she’s done; she’s not going on like this. She brings up Ramona talking about her daughter. She says she wishes Ramona well, but she’s hit the wall. Even if she made up with Ramona, they’d just end up in the same place again.

Sonja talks to her assistant about Tinsley seeing her friends more than her. She found out about the dinner, and some other thing, and wonders how to bring it up. Tinsley overhears. In her interview, Tinsley is shocked, since Sonja wanted her to go out with her friends. Tinsley comes in and tells Sonja about hearing what she said. They discuss who is close friends with who. Sonja says don’t make her feel bad, and Tinsley tells Sonja not to make her feel bad. In her interview, Tinsley wonders if because she’s staying in Hannah’s room, Sonja is treating her like a daughter, and telling her what to do. Sonja says it’s just a matter of etiquette, and she should have been invited; she’s hurt, not angry. She brings up her birthday. Tinsley says she gave Sonja a candle, but Sonja says that’s because she’d brought a man home, and that’s a no-no in her daughter’s room. Geez, Tinsley couldn’t even cough up a birthday gift for Sonja?

Next time, Carole’s Ramona-less election party, Carole ruins the surprise, and Ramona tells Sonja that they’re not friends.

🗽 Important news – Million Dollar Listing NYC begins on Thursday, May 29th at 9 pm.

🐎 I also can’t wait for Return to Amish, this Sunday night at 8 pm (TLC). Mary is my all time favorite reality show cast member. Aside from LVP, of course.

 

April 25, 2017 – Nina Gets a Horse, Alex Lies About Lushion & a Beverly Hills Farewell

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Michael plays pool by himself. Lulu and Dante walk in, and Michael tells them about Jax being released. He says Nelle did something good for Jax, but it doesn’t absolve her. Lulu says as bad as it was, it takes two, and Michael asks if Nelle didn’t tell them. Lulu says she can tell them herself right now, since she just walked in.

Valentin is looking for his watch. It’s in Nina’s hand. Listening in, Anna tells her to mind her own business, raising my blood pressure by 100 points, since she should be minding her own business and Nina is married to Valentin, so it is her business.

Tracy tells Ned that the only option is for Samira to leave. Or wait for immigration to come with a warrant. Samira says she’s not leaving without the painting. It’s the only way to save her daughter.

Finn runs into Hayden. He asks if they can make it not awkward. Griff comes along, and says Finn’s test came back positive. Because Brad had his grubby little hands on it. He doesn’t say that last part, but we know it.

Nina wonders why Valentin needed another watch. He says he used to do questionable things for money, and now he has money to buy questionable things. He says he indulged himself, but he’d rather indulge her. He’s bought her a horse. They go to the stables, and the watch gets left on the table. Poor Anna. She can’t listen in. I’m just devastated.

Griff tells Finn it’s not specific, but it’s some form of opiate. Finn says that’s impossible, but Griff says they ran it twice. Finn wonders if there’s still a trace of Zen-Zen in his system. He says the test needs to be repeated, but he thinks it’s a mistake. Griff says next time it had better show a decrease, and under no circumstances is he to treat patients. When Griff leaves, Hayden asks if Finn has been using.

Tracy says she’s just trying to help. Samira says she can’t leave without the painting. Laura says it’s more than a reminder of Tracy’s father, and has the power to save a life. What if she was in Samira’s shoes? She didn’t even know it existed a few months ago, and the real connection is the letter. Tracy wonders how she’d get it out of the country – it’s bound to bring attention to the expired visa. Samira says Tracy isn’t going to change her mind, and leaves the room. Ned thinks it requires further investigation. Laura wonders if Samira turns out to be Tracy’s sister, if she’ll change her mind, or does she want her out of sight before that happens?

Finn tells Hayden that he knows he’s an addict. If he uses again, he’ll lose everything. He wants to get out of the hole he’s dug for himself, and get everyone’s respect back. Hayden asks why he’s sweating, and he tells her that he did a workout on his lunch break. He says a way to cope with addiction is to distract oneself, and she can talk to Felix, who was there with him. She asks why the test came back positive, but Finn doesn’t know. Hayden asks him to promise he’s playing by the rules, and he says not exactly.

Michael approaches Nelle, and asks her to talk to Dante. At the table, Lulu says Nelle is crazy about Michael. She says unfortunately, she likes Nelle, and thinks Michael was into her before the thing happened with Sonny. Dante says they’re not in the loop, and don’t know what happened. Lulu suggests he take his detective hat off and they enjoy the evening.

Nina loves her horse; she’d always wanted one of her own. She says that Lumière is the perfect name. Valentin tells her that its a horse of a different rare color. Nina says that Lumière defies light and glows, and Valentin says that she does too. They start to kiss, and pervert Anna has no shame. Her doorbell rings. It’s Griff.

Griff asks why Anna hasn’t returned his calls or texts. She didn’t show up for a phlebotomy, and she has no idea how dangerous that is. He wants her to go right now, but she tells him to wait. She says she’s fine, and Griff says she’s not super human. He explains how it can cause a blood clot. He threatens to call Robin. She says she doesn’t want them to intervene; she’s already had her treatment. She decided to go to a private facility. GH is too public, with everyone being so concerned. It’s lovely in theory, but she doesn’t want the fuss. He says left to her own devices, she could skip a treatment. She asks him to respect her wishes and privacy. He tells her that blood cancer is nothing to be remiss about, and he’s also worried about her and Valentin. She says that Valentin’s accusations were right; she was very cruel to him. Griff says it doesn’t sound like her, and she says they all have their pasts. He asks what’s next between them.

Nina says she wants to go riding, but Valentin wants to change her mind.

Lulu and Dante sit at a table. Lulu says that they’re celebrating how well her first visit with Charlotte went, and asks Dante to put police business aside. Nelle tells Michael he could have her arrested. Lulu interrupts, and asks how Nelle’s new job is going. Nelle says that Charlotte loved the Easter egg hunt and seeing the bunny. Lulu is glad they had a chance to bond.

Dante talks to the bartender. He tells him about the pills, and wonders how they got there. He asks if the bartender had seen them, but he says no.

Finn tells Hayden that it has nothing to do with drugs. He had a friend come to him with a problem, and he offered to help. She asks what Tracy wanted. He says he could get in trouble, but it was important to the one friend he has. At least if he gets in trouble, it won’t be for drugs.

Laura says she knows who Tracy is deep down, and she’s better than this. Tracy says it hasn’t been proven yet, but Laura tells her to just do the right thing. Ned comes in with Samira, and says he’s making phone calls to see if there’s something else he can do. He asks Tracy to take her somewhere safe that’s close by, but Samira collapses.

Lulu tells Dante about Charlotte loving their visit. He says good, now she doesn’t have to pull any tricks with Valentin. She admits she was considering having Nelle spy on her, or involve Michael.

Michael tells Nelle that it sucks being the prize in a custody war. Nelle asks how he knows, and he tells her about several over him. He says he spent a lot of time being shuttled back and forth, knowing the people he loved were angry because of him. Nelle wonders if he could explain it to Charlotte. Or maybe not. She says if he wants to talk to Dante, do it now, because she doesn’t like the threat hanging over her.

Hayden brings up Finn saying she was a gold-digger, but he doesn’t remember saying it. He says she changed, showing compassion and love when he needed it, and he’s going to change too. He knows he has a long way to go, but he’s working on it. He talks about when they first met, and tells her that she’s succeeded. He will too, but it won’t be easy. Maybe she can see he’s on the right path to being the man she can trust.

Tracy comes into the hospital with Samira. Finn directs them to an examining room. He says he can’t help her, but Tracy says it’s an emergency. Finn asks a nurse to get her vitals. Tracy asks if he’ll treat Samira.

Anna tells Griff that she and Valentin made a truce. Griff says that Valentin doesn’t seem like the forgiving type. He doesn’t trust Valentin, and doesn’t think she should. Finn calls, and tells Griff that it’s an emergency. He says she has an expired visa and immigration is after her, and maybe Griff can help. Griff tells Anna he has to go, but they’ll have dinner another time. As soon as he’s gone, she schedules the phlebotomy that she didn’t really get.

Valentin tells Nina he loves her and she transformed his life. She’s made him happier than he deserves to be. He was a bad man who did bad things. He never really changed until Charlotte came along. Nina says that she hasn’t been a nice person either. He says her choices were made out of pain. He just wants her and Charlotte to be happy. He’s sorry about the whole business with Anna, and apologizes. Nina says she loves the horse, but all he has to do is be honest with her.

Anna listens in. Nina says she has to give Valentin honesty in return. She says the Anna thing bothered her. He says that Anna’s past is as dingy as his own, and she offered a truce. Nina says the truth is, if you suspect cheating and it turns out to be true, it’s hard to trust again. She wonders if it’s something that will be with her forever, and says Jealousy makes people do crazy things. She doesn’t want to go backwards and give into herself because of Anna He says Anna isn’t a threat to them, and ominous Anna says they’ll see about that. Valentin suggests they go to the bedroom. Nina wants to ride first, and suggests they have dinner in bed. He says he has to run an errand, but will be back by dinner.

Anna calls Valentin when Nina leaves. He asks what she wants. She asks if it’s a bad time, and he says actually he needs to see her. She says she needs to see him too, and he says he’s on his way.

Michael tells Nelle it was up to his dad to talk to Dante, so she’s off the hook. He says he knows she wasn’t completely at fault, but he feels worst for Avery and Josslyn. She says she never meant to hurt them, and he tells her that revenge is like an explosion; you don’t know where it will hit. She says he’s never going to forgive her, and he says he doesn’t know. Her takeout food comes, and he says maybe someday he can forgive her. She leaves.

Lulu tells Dante that she was going to give Michael a nudge, but now she doesn’t have to. Dante says he can’t believe she’d use his brother for her personal gain, and she says it was her mom’s idea.

Griff gets to the hospital, and Finn tells Laura she’s in good hands. He tells Tracy that Samira could just be dehydrated and stressed. She asks about the DNA test, and he says it could be tonight or a few days. Ned pops out of nowhere, and asks Tracy what that was about.

Hayden tells Finn that she’s impressed he didn’t break his agreement. He says he’s trying. She says she sees that, and sees who he is when not under the influence. She’s going to give them time. He says that’s all he asks. She says it’s a deal.

Tracy tells Ned she’s just worried about Samira. He wonders why she cares so much so soon; it’s not like her. He says Edward is where she’s most vulnerable. He thinks the painting is key. Laura asks Tracy if she’s okay. She says not until she gets the test back, and that might not be for days.

Lulu tells Dante that Nelle screwed up, but might do better if someone believes in her.

Nina looks for Valentin, but he’s not there. She thinks back to when she found Anna in the living room with him. She says, please don’t be with Anna. Nelle tells her that Charlotte isn’t in her room, and Nina apologizes, telling Nelle that Charlotte is at a sleepover. Nelle says she has a book she wants to finish, a spy thriller, her favorite genre. Nina asks for a favor. She wants Nelle to put her love for spy thrillers to good use. She’d like Nelle to spy on someone.

Anna’s doorbell rings. Guess who? She invites Valentin in, and thanks him for coming. He says he’s just come to return the watch. I think she’s trying to smile romantically at him, but only succeeds in looking insane IMO. He says whatever was between them is over. She takes his hand and gives him another creepy smile.

Tomorrow, Nelle asks who Nina wants her to spy on, Sonny talks to Bobbie, and Carly says she won’t do anything that Sonny doesn’t deserve. Well, that sure leaves it open.

If Loving You is Wrong

I hope Officer Rick is going to be a thing. I’m starting to like him.

Alex is walking the kids home from school and they see Randal. He wants to talk to her, but she says she has to get the kids to bed. They remind her 3 pm is too early for bed. Well, that depends. She sends them inside, and Alex tells Randal to never bring them into it again. He tells her that jail might be safer for her now, after Natalie finds out she’s sleeping with Lushion. She tells him he’s mental. Randal asks if it’s Lushion’s baby, and she says wouldn’t he like to know? He says three men is a lot even for a pro ho like her. Although I would think that if you were a pro, that wouldn’t be very many. She tells him it’s four, and she’s not sure who the baby’s father is. He asks if she’s sleeping with Lushion, and she says yes. Why, Alex, why? Why get Lushion in trouble when he’s one of the few decent guys on this show? (Just in case you’re a new viewer, she’s lying. Lushion would never do such a thing.)

Randal calls Alex a slut, and she thanks him. He asks where they did it and she says mostly in the police car. She tells him to go ahead and tell Natalie. He wonders who she is, and she says she asks herself the same question every time she sees him. He regrets having met her, and she says finally, something they can agree on. He says he’ll make sure every day of her life is a living hell, which actually might be an improvement. She tells him to run along and start preparing. He suggests she sent her parents there to kill him. She’s like, sorry, sorry that they didn’t succeed. He says he sees a little, abused girl trying to be a woman. She tells him he must know that some of those women have sexual issues and she’s one of them. She wants it wherever and whenever she can get it. He tells her to shut up, and she says he’s the one who wanted to analyze her. She says he’s not as good as he thought. He says she loved every minute, and she says she kind of misses it. He tells her to hold on to the memory and she laughs. She teases him, talking about how she remembers when she’s alone at night. That’s when she calls Lushion and he makes her forget all about Randal. He says she’s lying. She asks if he got a good look at the baby, and that he looks just like Lushion. Randal says if the test comes back and the baby isn’t his, she’ll see what happens.

She asks if he wants her. She says she’s wearing the perfume he likes. She asks him to tell her. He says he doesn’t want her and hates her. She says that’s good because she hates him too. She suggests they meet in the shed. Randal says she’s up to something. She says not as much as him.

Eddie nearly runs them over. He jumps out of his truck, and starts screaming at the both of them. Alex’s kids come out, and she says everything is fine and to go back in. She tells them that Eddie lost control of his truck. Paisley says he was probably texting and driving. Surprisingly, Eddie holds it together, and tells them to get inside. He says Alex isn’t going anywhere until they talk. He asks what she’s doing, and says that the blonde dye has soaked into her head. He says he’s telling Brad, and she says go ahead. He wants to talk about the murder she committed. She’s like, huh? She says she didn’t kill anyone; she went to her parents to tell them to lay off of Randal. She had nothing to do with it, and she isn’t an accessory. He wonders who’s been training her on how to speak. He asks if Lushion has been talking to her about Andrew. She says she has nothing to do with that, and Eddie says she ran him over. We both go, what? Eddie claims he’s trying to help her, and she wonders when that’s ever happened. Eddie says Andrew has been missing since she ran him over. Alex asks what he wants. He says nothing, but if she keeps telling tall tales, it’s going to be a bad day, like it’s not already. He tells her Andrew is dead, and she says she didn’t do it. She asks why they haven’t found him, and Eddie says anything could have drug him into the swamp. He tells her to keep telling herself lies, but they both know the truth.

Kelly gets a call from her ex, Tyrell (I finally caught his name). He asks what’s wrong, and she says nothing, but he’s not buying it. She asks how he is, and he says he knows something is wrong for sure now. Kelly says it’s his mother. She came by asking for a key, but she wants to talk to Justice first. Tyrell understands, but Kelly says his mother didn’t. He says he’ll talk to her, but Kelly thinks it will just make her angrier. He says she just loves her baby boy, and Kelly says she loves hers too. He asks if she loves him too. She says Justice just got off the bus (a mother’s equivalent of saying there’s something on the stove), and asks if he can call her back. He tells her he loves her, and to give his love to Justice. He doesn’t seem awful. What’s up with that mother? Kelly calls Justice’s phone.

Lushion calls Natalie, asking where she is. She tells him she’s at work, but she’s on the way. She tells him that Mr. Kim came by the hospital and said he was sorry. He also offered Joey a job. He was glad Joey was there to protect Faun. She asks what’s wrong, and Lushion tells her to hurry up and get there. He says there’s a problem they need to solve, and he’ll tell her when she gets there.

Marcie comes to Brad’s office. She wonders if he’s been ignoring her calls, but he says he’s been swamped. She was thinking about what he said about Alex, and she’s going to stop. She has one condition – Alex needs to stop taunting her. She’s vague about how Alex is doing that, but says if Alex leaves her alone, she’ll leave Alex alone. He says he’ll mention it, and Marcie asks if he’s talking to Alex. He says no, but when Marcie says he’s thinking about it, he says maybe. She asks what that means for them, and he says they already talked about it. She says she’s not ready to give him up, and he tells her that she’s all over the place. She says she needs him. He says he’ll send her the rent. She says it’s not that. She has big decisions to make, and needs someone she trusts to help her through it.

Marcie sits on Brad’s lap. She tells him she cares about him, appreciates him, and really loves him. He says he loves her too, and they kiss. What is up with this? She wants him to know she’ll always love him whether they end up together or not, and he says he feels the same way. He wants her to get up, but she doesn’t want to, so he tickles her. He says her stomach is different. She says thanks, she just ate lunch. He wonders if she’s pregnant by him, but she says they both know that’s not possible. He says that would certainly get the town talking, and she says it would be the ultimate pay-back. She asks if he wants a child with her, but he says not in this situation. She asks if it would be that bad, and Brad says she’s scaring him. He says he’s going to be late. Marcie asks if he’s going to see Alex, and he says maybe. Marcie leaves, and Brad is like, whew!

Randal’s doorbell rings. It’s a woman who’s come to do the DNA test. She makes small talk about his house while she sets up the test. She tells him he has a lot of muscles, and he says she’s hot as hell. She says she used to compete. Seriously, would someone who does in-home DNA tests have this kind of conversation? She says they’re going to do both a swab and blood test. He asks what she’s doing later, and she tells him she’s having dinner with her wife and their kids. He asks if she’s a lesbian, and she says she doesn’t like labels. I roll my eyes at the both of them. She says even if she was into guys, she wouldn’t be into one who denies his kid. He says that’s not it; he wants custody. She says good for him; he’s one of the good guys. If she only knew. He wonders why she’s not testing anyone else. He tells her that Lushion was one of his ex’s partners, and he just lives down the block. She says she’ll get on it. She leaves while Randal flexes his muscles. He says she thinks she’s gay, but not when he’s done with her. Randal has reached a new low.

Esperanza and Rick are trying to track down Justice. They have the judge issuing warrants, but Rick says if the phone battery has been taken out, they can’t trace it. He asks if Kelly might have set this up. Esperanza says she wouldn’t do that, but Rick says that Travis tells a different story and has proof. He says that Travis has a text message, and Esperanza tells him that he’s acting like a rookie; she can vouch for Kelly. Rick asks why Kelly didn’t file a restraining order, and Esperanza says she did. He says only Travis has one on file, and there’s back up.  Esperanza tells him to just do his job. She calls Kelly, and tells her to relax and let the police handle things. Kelly is borderline hysterical, and Esperanza asks why she didn’t file the restraining order. Kelly thinks Esperanza is accusing her of being responsible for the kidnapping, and says that the lawyer didn’t call her back. Esperanza asks for the lawyer’s information. She tells Kelly to hold on.

Esperanza calls the lawyer, but he’s not in. She finds out that he’s at church. She asks what one, and thanks them. She tells Kelly that the lawyer isn’t returning her calls because he’s a member of Travis’s church. She gives the phone to Rick. He asks if Kelly heard anything in the background, but she didn’t. He says there’s an APB out, and asks if Travis would hurt Justice or where he might take him. Kelly doesn’t know. Esperanza says they’re sending someone to the church. Kelly says she can’t just sit there. Rick gets a check on Justice’s phone and jets. Kelly tells Esperanza that she’s coming to the station.

Everyone arrives at Kelly’s house at the same time – Kelly, Esperanza, and the police. Esperanza holds Kelly back while the police go in with guns drawn, but they come back out. They’re all coughing and waving their hands.

Next time, Brad threatens to kick Randal’s ass, Randal talks to Natalie, and Eddie says the party is just gettin’ started.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion, Part Three

We go back to the bunny. Kim never gave it to her grandson, and because it wasn’t given to her with the “right energy,” she gives it back to LisaR, who ends up leaving the stage. Kyle thinks Kim should explain how superstitious she is to Lisa, and Kim takes the roving bunny with her backstage.

She runs into LisaR, who’s coming back out. Lisa says it’s the most humiliating thing that’s ever happened to her, and Kim is a sick woman. I agree that it’s pretty bad, and I don’t even like Lisa. Eileen comes back on stage and says it doesn’t look good. Kyle says nobody wants the bunny, but Andy does, for the clubhouse. He’s the worst.

LisaR strides back to the reunion circle, and says it was cruel and mean. Kim tries to justify her actions, and Lisa has an f-off sound effect thing, and keeps pushing the button on it. Kim says she was going to do it before, but she figured they’d both be at the reunion. So yeah, why not do it on national TV instead of in private? Lisa says she’s a sick woman, and Kim says she feels the same way about Lisa. Lisa says Kim wants to be on the show, and she’s her meal ticket, which is where she goes totally wrong. Even I think that’s stupid. Not that it excuses Kim’s behavior. Lisa accuses Kyle of condoning every rotten thing that Kim has done, and Kyle says it’s not like she has control over her, and she’s not apologizing for anything her sister does.

Dorit tells LisaR that she has a big mouth, and Lisa tells her to shut up, causing a moment of silence. Dorit tells Lisa that she goes for the jugular, and like usual when she can’t form real words, Lisa says that Dorit does too. Lisa says she speaks her truth, and Kyle says that doesn’t make it okay. She put Kyle in the worst position, when they’d never even had a fight. Lisa says she’s apologized. Lisa says Kyle says mean things about her lips, and I can’t believe that’s’ the best she can come up with. Andy moves on.

A viewer suggests the only reason Eden went after Kyle and Kim, is that she wanted to create a storyline for herself. Eden says she wasn’t the one who said those things, but agreed with it because of her own past. It was something she recognized and projected onto them.

Omg I can’t believe it. We go back to when the earth cooled, in the limousine, where Kyle talked about how Mauricio supported Kim like a second wife, because a viewer has asked if that wasn’t enabling. Kyle says that she believes enabling is turning a blind eye to the situation, and that’s never been the case with her. She has a wing of hair sticking out, and it’s all I can look at.

A viewer asks if LisaV thinks LisaR was acting when she said she didn’t remember saying anything about Kim and Kyle. Because LisaV knows all. LisaV says if she’d said something like that, she’d remember. Dorit says LisaR crucified her for not remembering a five-minute conversation. LisaR tells her to shut up again, and then says sorry. Another viewer asks Kyle if she thought LisaR really forgot. Lisa keeps repeating that she really didn’t remember. Eileen says that what Lisa said was wrong, but game night got weird because of Kim. We flash back, but I don’t see it that way. Eileen babbles, and tells Kim not to be rude, because she has something to say. She says Kim inserted herself in a conversation where she didn’t belong, and she has no idea what she’s talking about. I’m not sure Eileen knows what she’s talking about. I also hate how she hammers questions at someone, then talks over them when they try to answer. Eileen tells Kim that just because she’s obnoxious, doesn’t mean she’s right. She says that Kim attacked her and LisaR. LisaV says that what LisaR said was incredibly damaging, and LisaR says she apologized. She hasn’t said anything about Kim since, and thought they’d made amends. We flash back, and it looks that way to me. LisaR says it she sees that it’s not going to work, but that’s okay. She’s moved on.

And we’re moving on to the bag o’ pills. We flash back to LisaR saying she put Xanax in smoothies, pulling out her plastic bag, and Dorit repeating the story. Then telephone gets played with Eden, and we come full circle to the confrontations on the boat and the Hong Kong dinner. LisaR always comes off as crazy as a loon to me. Kyle acts like Eden started it. I get distracted by Dorit’s dress, because it has tiny chains hanging all over it. I love it so much. Dorit explains why she asked Eden about LisaR, and says she didn’t say that Lisa had a Xanax problem; LisaR created the story. LisaR says Dorit “makes her head crazy.” I have the feeling that doesn’t take much.

LisaR insists that Dorit kept talking about it. Lisa pulls out the bag of pills, and Andy asks what’s in there. It’s nothing exciting. Lisa says she takes Benadryl is for acid reflux, and I’ve never heard of such a thing. She tells Andy that she’s never really put Xanax in a smoothie, and Andy says she could use one. Erika says when you say sh*t, it becomes bigger than it is. She says it doesn’t make anybody look good; they’re all in the same boat, and she doesn’t understand why it keeps happening.

Andy asks about the coke thing. LisaR says she was just being honest. Dorit says she’s a mom, and Lisa went there for no reason. Lisa says it’s what she observed, and Dorit says she said it to hurt her. Kyle says she would have flipped out if it had been said about her. Andy asks why did everyone get up and where did they go? I find out the guy who got stuck at the table with Lisa is Elliot Mince. Lisa says that Dorit was told she needed a touch up, and everyone disappeared. I’m thinking they wanted to get away from Lisa, and maybe Elliot is deaf. Dorit says she doesn’t know what happened. It could have been a number of things, none of which is what Lisa insinuated. Andy asks if there were drugs at her party, and Dorit says of course not, it’s ridiculous. He asks if Lisa’s personality is induced in any way, and Lisa says she’s 100% Lisa.

Andy almost gets Kim and Eden off the stage, but Eileen interrupts, saying that Kim looks down on her because she’s a soap actress. Kim says she doesn’t, but she thinks Eileen is exaggerating things, and reality TV is different. Eileen asks if Kim has seen herself. Kim says she’s dramatic, but it’s real life drama. Eileen says she doesn’t talk about Kim that way. Kim repeats that this is real life, and Eileen says bye-bye, rude, bye-bye Kim, which makes her look pretty immature. Kim brings up Eileen’s support of LisaR, and Eileen says she thought it might have something to do with that. LisaV suggests that Eileen is supportive when LisaR is wrong, but Eileen and LisaR won’t hear of it.

Eden and Kim finally exit. LisaR claims she needs a Xanax, and walks offstage. What did Erika just say? She’s doing it to herself.

We go down LisaV Memory Lane. We go over her work for the dogs, and I try not to get all emotional. I love Lisa all over again. We also flash back to Max’s search for his birth parents. Andy asks how Lisa came to terms with that. She says that she felt more vulnerable in the beginning. She tells Andy that they found Max’s mother. Andy asks if he’s going to meet her, and Lisa thinks he should. He says he wants to thank her. She says if she was younger, she might feel threatened, because he could be taken away, but it’s still emotional. She says she wants to create a buffer in case it doesn’t work out the way they’re hoping. We move on to the condo that Lisa gave Max. A viewer wonders why she got it for him, since she promotes her kids making it on their own. She says that he’s a good kid who holds down a job, has been on his own for years, and asks for nothing, so she just wanted to do it. Seriously, I wouldn’t take up much space in her house if she wants to adopt me.

Andy talks about the dog meat trade, and asks if China has acknowledged our fight against it. Lisa says what’s important is to get the word out. Taiwan did recently outlaw the dog and cat meat trade, which is definitely progress, but it was before this was filmed. Eileen says she’s done a great thing, and Lisa thanks everyone for being supportive.

A viewer accuses LisaV of replacing Giggy with a younger, furrier Harrison. Lisa says Harrison was very needy and she probably over compensated, but the Gigster still reigns, and they’re best friends. Andy asks if it’s like Menudo at her house, and all of us laugh. We see an interview with Giggy. Too cute for words. Giggy!

We see LisaR’s nude selfie from Instagram. Thanks. Harry didn’t even know about it, but her daughters made her take it down. We look back on family time at Lisa’s house. They discuss Delilah’s new modeling career, and Lisa says Amelia is right on her heels. Andy stupidly wonders if it was awkward when Delilah did the same show as Gigi Hadid. Lisa says not at all, and talks about how lovely Gigi is and that Yolanda did a wonderful job. We find out that Harry watches all of the shows. She says he tells her she just can’t help herself, and she gets it from all sides.

Andy asks if there are any regrets. LisaR says she’ll never talk about Kim again. He asks Eileen what she has to say to her critics, and she says she always comes from a good place. Dorit says she wouldn’t have given Erika the underwear, and she’s learned about how it goes when something gets out there. Kyle says new people shift the dynamics, but she thinks they’re all good people, and it was a good experience. Andy asks LisaV what she’d do if someone tried to steal the crown, and Lisa says let them have it, adding that she’s had good relationships this season. I’m sure anything beats Brandi. Andy says that Erika revealed more than she had possibly planned on revealing, and Erika says no regrets. She hopes people see that she’s like everyone else inside. Andy brings up how she said everyone needs a little Erika Jayne, and asks who needs it the most. Erika says they all need triple-shots right now.

This helps Andy segue to the smoothie toast he’s prepared, and he asks LisaR for the bunny. She gives it to him for the clubhouse (where it was the bartender, as well as the secret word tonight). The smoothies have umbrellas in them. Andy says long live The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and everyone clinks glasses. Lisa says it’s better with a Xanax.

The end…for now.

April 24, 2017 – Tracy has an Idea, Shep has a Birthday & Patricia has a Pet Caftan Line

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Alexis asks Julian to wait. Like he has a choice, since he’s being moved out in shackles.

Ned doesn’t want Olivia to go it alone, but she says he’ll be there in spirit.

Samira stares at the painting. Ned tells her they can only cover for her for so long. She wants to leave immediately, with the painting, but Ned thinks Tracy might object to that. No offense to this girl, but unless she’s leaving something out of her story (which no doubt she is), why on earth would she think Tracy owes her a $20 million painting?

On the phone at the hospital, Tracy says she needs the result of the DNA test now. Laura pops out of nowhere, and asks what DNA test?

Jason asks if Jake recognizes a picture in the photo album. Jake looks disturbed, and Jason says that it’s a picture of him before his accident. He asks if Jake remembers what he looked like then, and Jake says he does.

Jax wants Carly and Josslyn to move to Australia where they can be a family.

Jordan tells them to take Julian back to his cell. She asks Alexis what’s going on, and Alexis says they were just surprised to see each other. Diane arrives, and Jordan says she just missed Julian. She asks if Alexis is ready to make her statement. Diane wants to confer with Alexis in private first, but Alexis just wants to get it over with. Jordan wonders why Diane is there, since it’s just a statement. She wants to know what happened while the details are fresh. Diane’s suit is to die for. Black and white with zipper detailing. All suits should look like this.

In the interrogation room, Jordan starts the recording. Jordan asks Alexis if she recognizes her own scarf, and if it was found at the location where Julian kidnapped her. Alexis says she wasn’t kidnapped, giving Diane apoplexy.

Samira wonders where Tracy is, and asks Ned if he thinks Tracy is avoiding her.

Laura tells Tracy that she was there for a board meeting that Tracy missed, and Tracy says she can’t be everywhere at once. Laura asks if the test has something to do with Samira. Tracy drags her by her elbow into a more private area, and makes her swear she won’t say anything. She explains about Samira giving her the journal and signet ring, and how Samira said that Edward had given them to her mother. She says that along with Samira’s blue eyes, and Laura finishes that she thinks Edward might be Samira’s father. Laura asks what Samira thinks, and Tracy tells Laura how she got the DNA and gave it to Finn. Laura says she shouldn’t be going behind Samira’s back. Tracy says she doesn’t want to get Samira’s hopes up, since it’s a remote idea. She says Finn will confirm it, and she can put her ridiculous speculations behind her. Laura says she seems nervous.

Elizabeth tells Jason that it never bothered Jake before. Jason asks why it bothers him now. Jake says it doesn’t, and they both say that he can tell him anything. He says it bothers him because of the witch.

Carly tells Jax that she can’t go. Jax asks why not. He tells her to pack for a few days, and they’ll send for the rest later. She says it’s sudden. Jax says Sonny pushing the issue has done them a favor. Maybe it’s fate’s way of saying it’s their time to be together for keeps. He still loves her. She says she loves him too. He asks if it’s like she used to, and maybe it’s closer to the surface than she thinks. She says it’s complicated. She knows who’s to blame for all this mess. Jax says they’ve been through a lot of messes, and they still end up in each other’s orbit. They’re connected, and bring out the best in each other. They make more sense when they’re together. He thinks their lives can be greater together than being apart.

Jax thinks that after everything that happened with Morgan, the best thing is for Carly to leave Port Charles. She says It’s tempting, but Josslyn isn’t her only family. He says Michael can visit, but she says she feels close to Morgan in Port Charles. His grave marker helps her talk to him. Jax says she’ll take his memories wherever she goes; she can never break their connection. She says it’s not the same.

Laura says that Tracy just found out her father loves her, and then Samira shows up wanting the painting. Tracy tells Laura that just because she’s dating a psychiatrist, doesn’t mean she can shrink Tracy’s head. They decide to go back to the estate. Laura says until Tracy finds out if it’s positive, she can make peace with the fact that she might have a sister. Tracy corrects that to half-sister.

Samira asks Ned if Tracy will still refuse her. Ned thinks she’s made up her mind. Samira asks how she can convince her, and shows Ned a picture of her daughter, Sadika. She says her daughter needs her.

Olivia-F visits Julian. He asks if she’s there to gloat. She tells him about the engagement, and he says he’s happy for them, but wonders what else she has to say. She says what they’ve decided affects him as well.

Diane says Julian admitted it, but Jordan says they’re getting the victim’s point-of-view. Diane wants a moment alone with her client, but Jordan says she hasn’t not committed a crime. She asks if Alexis made an arrangement to meet Julian, and when Alexis says no, Diane thanks God for small favors. Alexis says Julian surprised her, but she went with him of her own free will. Jordan asks if Julian didn’t try to kill her at the docks, and why would she go voluntarily? Alexis says she was trying to convince him to turn himself in, but hadn’t made much headway before the police arrived. Jordan figures they were there an hour, and I’ll refrain from any jokes. Jordan thinks there’s something Alexis isn’t telling her. Alexis thinks about getting busy with Julian, and says there is.

Alexis tells Jordan that there was some confusion as to why she was there, and one officer thought she was an accomplice. Julian was worried, so he said he’d taken her hostage. She says it was his idea at the spur of the moment. Jordan asks why she waited to say anything, and Alexis says everything happened fast. She repeats that Julian didn’t take her hostage. She asks Jordan since he charges will be dropped, is the case against him still as strong?

Julian asks Olivia how their getting married affects him. She says he’s probably going to prison for a long time, and Leo isn’t going to know him. She’s not bringing him to visit. She says she wants Ned to adopt Leo, and Julian says, absolutely not.

Ned tells Samira that her daughter has the same blue eyes that she does. Samira tells him about a song she used to sing to her daughter in English, and starts to sing We Gather Together, possibly because they want me to cry. Tracy and Laura walk in. Tracy is stunned.

Carly tells Jax that the only reason Nelle is still in Port Charles is to get her claws into Michael. She doesn’t know how he became so trusting, considering how he was raised, and Jax suggests that it’s his form of rebellion. Carly says that if she stays, she can get in his face about it. Jax says that her staying isn’t going to influence him. Michael is either going to forgive Nelle or not, but it’s up to him; she can’t dictate his life. He thinks what’s stopping her is Sonny.

Elizabeth changes the subject, but then asks if Jake wants to talk about the witch. He says he doesn’t. Jason tells him that’s fine, but no witch is going to hurt him; he’s safe with them. He asks to go to his room. When he goes upstairs, Elizabeth asks what made Jason think of the picture? Jason says that’s how he looked when he worked for Helena.

Jordan says she can’t comment on the case. Diane asks if Alexis is done and free to go, and Jordan hopes she’s not obstructing justice. Jordan says Alexis should listen – Diane is trying to save her from herself.

Olivia-F says no one needs to make Leo forget; Julian is doing fine on his own. Why does he want to remind Leo of what he’s done? She tells Julian to do what’s best for Leo, and let him be raised so he’s proud of himself, not ashamed of where he comes from. She says that Julian says he loves Leo, and letting Ned adopt him would be the greatest gift he could give to him.

Ned talks about how his family sings the hymn every year at Thanksgiving. Tracy says it’s a very popular hymn, but Samira says not in Turkey, and I laugh. She tells them that her mother taught it to her. Tracy says they have things to talk about. Samira asks if she reconsidered, and Tracy says she’s keeping the painting. Ned takes her outside the room to talk. Ned tells Tracy that they have another problem, and it has nothing to do with the painting.

Jason tells Elizabeth that he doesn’t remember his years with Helena. He did anything Helena ordered him to do. He thinks he lived on the island too, and Jake saw him with Helena, and that’s why he’s afraid.

Carly tells Jax that Sonny doesn’t control her. She says she just declared war, and she’s not running now. Jax says that will only feed Sonny’s ego, but she can prove he no longer matters, and that’s victory. She says Sonny is not getting away with it. Jax says that instead of giving herself a shot at happiness, she wants to fight Sonny because he’s still in her blood and always will be.

Laura tells Samira they’ll find a way to save her daughter. She gives Samira a dress she bought for her. Samira says she won’t be there along enough to wear it.

Ned tells Tracy that immigration will be back with a warrant. She says she knows how to help Samira.

Diana asks wth is the matter with Alexis? Alexis says she told the truth, and Diane says a selective version. For once she doesn’t want to hear the details, but reminds Alexis of the consequences. She painted Julian as a saint. The bar committee might interpret her actions as harboring a criminal, and she could permanently lose her license. Diane asks if he’s worth it.

Jason says Helena was able to force him to put a bomb on The Haunted Star, and could have ordered him to do anything, and he’d have done it. Elizabeth suggests Jake could have seen something.

Jax tells Carly to prove he’s wrong. She says it’s not the right time, and she’s sorry. He says he loves her, and he knows she loves him in her own way, but it’s not enough. He has to go, and she has to stay and get back together with Sonny. She says that’s not happening. Jax says Sonny is at the epicenter of everything, and he’s going to end up destroying her because he can’t help himself.

Olivia-F says that it’s not her intention to hurt Julian; she just wants what’s best for their son. He says that he does too, and she asks him to think it over. He’s going to prison for a long time, and even if he gets out, who will be waiting?

Alexis says she’ll have to cross those bridges when they come to her, and Diane tells her to just make sure not to burn them as she scampers across. Alexis says the charges won’t stick. She asks if they can’t get him on Olivia-J’s crimes, if the kidnapping charge is on failsafe. Diane asks how it would change anything if he walks away.

Tracy tells Ned that there’s only one thing they can do. Ned asks if it will help get Samira’s daughter back. Tracy says in the long run, but she needs to get Samira out of the country now.

Jason says maybe Jake is afraid because back then, Jason did something terrible to him.

Carly tells Jax that she’ll never let Sonny destroy her, but she needs time to process everything. Jax says they’ll always be friends, and he’ll always help as much as he can. She says she doesn’t think she’s being unreasonable, and he tells her to take her time, but he doesn’t know if he’ll be waiting. He says it’s not an ultimatum, but sometimes if you pass on an offer, it doesn’t come back. She says she’ll take her chances; it wouldn’t be fair with so much unresolved, especially with Josslyn. She thanks him for the needed clarity and something to think about. She tells him to fly safe, and he says he’s an expert pilot. They say good-by, and you know what I’m thinking.

Tomorrow, Nelle thinks Michael is never going to forgive her, Samira collapses, and Griff asks Anna if she knows how dangerous what she’s doing is.

😞 Jane Elliot is going to be leaving the show on May 4th, so there will be a special episode on Friday, highlighting Tracy’s exploits.

Southern Charm

Landon unloads stuff from the trunk of her car – or rather, has someone else do it – for the polo match at Thomas’s plantation. Thomas says she knows how to entertain and is good in the kitchen, unlike some other women who have been in his life. We flash back to Kathryn trying to cook dinner, a totally unfair comparison, since she’s also tending to a child. He wants a woman who will reflect positively on his legacy, and thinks maybe she’s the whole package. Oh, the jokes I could make, both about Thomas’s legacy and Landon being a package.

Everyone is getting ready. The horses are getting hosed down. The bar is set up. Guests start to arrive, and Landon plays Lady of the Manor. Or plantation, as it were.

Austen picks up Chelsea and I love, love, love her dress. The backless sundress style is flattering, and the orange and purple retro colors are fantastic. She says all she knows about polo is from Pretty Woman. I don’t even remember that. She says she made out with Shep once, but thinks he acts like an idiot.

Whitney tries to interact with Thomas’s baby. In her interview, Cameran says Whitney holding a baby is like Whitney holding a mop – he’s never done it before, so it’s awkward.

Landon tells Craig there’s hooch out back, and in his interview, he thinks she fits right in with this life. Chelsea eats like a heathen, and Austen wonders if it’s supposed to gross him out or turn him on. She tells Cameran and Whitney that it’s their first date, and Cameran questions if it’s breaking bro code, since Shep kind of had his eye on her. Well, maybe Shep needs to move faster.

Thomas explains polo rules to Austen. Craig wants to give it a go. Thomas’s kids are wheeled past in a giant stroller by the babysitter. Kelsey cries for daddy, but Thomas doesn’t even go over to them, since he wants to concentrate on the game. When Craig suggests he might want to give the child crying for him a hug, Thomas whines that he can’t please everyone. Craig is bothered, but Landon says Thomas is Thomas. Craig wonders how everyone would feel if Kathryn did the same thing. Good point, Craig. Landon thinks Craig doesn’t understand Southern social protocol. Craig tells Cameran about the kids calling for their dad, and him ignoring it, but she thinks it’s a healthy, stable environment. Craig decides to take a breather. In her interview, Cameran thinks he should re-focus his energy on helping himself.

Austen tells Chelsea that Thomas’s team won the match, and she says it’s rigged. Craig talks to Naomie about Thomas’s kids. In her interview, she says nobody likes a meddler. Yeah, unless that meddler is you. All of these people are meddlers.

Shep visits Whitney at his mommy’s house, while still drunk from the reception. He talks about turning 37 soon, and wonders where the years went. He thinks 40 is a good age to take stock, and says he has three years to go before he needs to panic. They make grilled cheese, and Shep asks what he missed. Whitney tells him about Austen and Chelsea being cozy at the polo match, and that he has competition.

Austen tells his roommate Dan about the possible breaking of bro code, but thinks it’s all good.

Shep asks if Austen and Chelsea were doing more than just talking. He wants to be in the know if someone is sitting in his chair. Whitney thinks he’s jealous because he’s been usurped by his protegee.

Kathryn meets Craig for dinner. He welcomes her back. She says she feels great, and asks about the charity event. She says it’s not that she didn’t want to see Thomas, but it didn’t seem like the right time. In his interview, he says he’s proud of her. He tells her about the polo match and Landon co-hosting. He says he thinks it makes Landon feel like she’s living her old life. In her interview, Kathryn says she’s been saying that Landon was pursuing Thomas, and when she reads people, she’s right. Craig tells her about Thomas ignoring the kids, and how he said he can’t please everyone. Kathryn says she has supervised visitation every other weekend. We see a clip of her picking the kids up. Craig wonders if they’ll get to the point where it’s joint custody. She says it’s complicated with all of the rules, and she’s dealing one day at a time.

Chelsea and Austen meet for drinks. They find out they’re both Geminis. She asks if he wants kids, and he tells her yes, but he’s not in a rush. She asks how many one-night stands he’s had. He tells her two or three, but in his interview, it’s a different story. He invites her over for a nightcap.

Shep calls Chelsea, who says she’s dying. She thought it was a good idea to drink Painkillers, and now she’s paying the price. He suggests that next time she goes out drinking, she let him know. We flash back to when they went out with Cameran, and Shep suggests she give him a haircut the next day and then have some fun. In his interview, he says he hates to lose.

Shep calls Landon. She doesn’t pick up, even though she’s looking at the phone. He invites her to his birthday boat cruise. It’s the next day, and I’m puzzled at how invitations always seem to be last-minute with this group. At most, they’re a week ahead of time. And these aren’t casual gettogethers. Either none of these people have anything to do, or they’re incredibly rude. Or both. We flash back to Shep giving Landon advice, and she says she’s not interested in being around him right now. She calls Craig, and asks if he’s going. He says they’ll just give Shep fuel if they don’t show up. He wonders if Shep is being an a-hole or a friend. Landon wishes it wasn’t on a boat, because it makes her feel trapped. Craig wonders if it’s on purpose, and she says she’s a good swimmer.

Naomie and Cameran go for mani/pedis. They talk about Shep’s birthday. Cameran says as the night gets older, he has the mental equivalent of a nine-year-old. They discuss Craig, and Cameran says he told her that he wants to build a real estate portfolio. She just wants him to find his niche. Cameran suggests that Naomie call him on not really wanting to be a lawyer. Naomie says it’s her fault for giving him a “safe space” at home. Cameran tells her that she can’t avoid discussing things because they’re uncomfortable. In her interview, she thinks Naomie is the best thing that’s happened to him, and if he doesn’t change, she’s going out the door. She tells Naomie not to be afraid to talk to him about it.

Shep goes to Chelsea’s salon to get a haircut. He’s taking this as a challenge. Not the haircut, getting together with her. She asks if he has a birthday date, and he says no. She asks if he met anyone at the wedding, and he says he’s weird and picky. He asks who she was with when she got drunk, and she says Austen. He asks if they’re romantically involved, and she says they’re hanging out and getting to know one another. She asks if he cares who she’s smooching, and he says he wants to be kept in the know. She asks about the reverse, and he says that he’s not with a different woman every night, but she says that’s the Shep she knows.

Austen picks out a checked shirt and says “righteous!” No. Just no.

Shep tells us that he loves kooky cocktail attire. When he dresses up, he doesn’t want to be conspicuous, but does want to be noticed. Everyone arrives at the boat. Shep tells Cameran about his haircut, and wonders if Chelsea has seen Austen since they went out drinking. Cameran says maybe they’re just friends, and points out that she and Shep go out together. In his interview, Shep says the definition of hanging out is different for everyone. So is hooking up. There’s awkwardness at the bar, with Shep, Austen, and Chelsea all there. In his interview, Whitney says Shep would do the same thing. Shep and Austen greet each other, and Chelsea looks super uncomfortable.

Craig got stuck in traffic, but manages to get there before launch time. The Caroline Girl shoves off, and Shep’s birthday is announced. Cameran tells Chelsea that the first thing Shep talked about was her going out with Austen. Chelsea says she had a blast with Austen, and felt chemistry. Cameran asks who’s the better kisser, and don’t lie. Chelsea thinks Austen has emotion, whereas Shep was like, you’re a girl and you’re here; there was no connection. Cameran says his reputation precedes him, and Chelsea says he’d have to do a lot to get her to stop thinking of him in that way. In her interview, Cameran says this screws up her grand plan, but maybe it’s a good thing, and will make Shep get it together. She hasn’t lost hope.

Cameran tells Shep about Chelsea and Austen making out. She says he needs to grow a pair. He says it’s easier for him to fool around with someone he doesn’t care about. Cameran says it’s not about that, and asks if he wants to be like Thomas – a fifty-year-old man with no shoelaces. We see Thomas, and sure enough, he’s wearing sneakers with no shoelaces. In his interview, Shep thinks Chelsea looks at him as never being serious.

Shep talks to Landon and Thomas. Landon wants to talk to him privately. Yep, she’s such an idiot, that she’s going to bother him with her feelings at his birthday party. He apologizes for being hard on her, but says he’d feel worse if he hadn’t said something. In her interview, Landon says it wasn’t exactly an apology, but if he wants to think they’re cool, fine.

Thomas tells Whitney that he doesn’t like pear-shaped girls, and he likes Landon’s body. He says that he’s never had “sexual relations with that woman,” but she’s the type he’d like. How repulsive is he? Let me count the ways. Landon sits down, and Thomas asks why he turns her off. She says that he doesn’t totally; they like a lot of the same things. She says a part of her wants to like Thomas, but there’s too much drama. She knows his reputation and current situation, and she was already married to that. Whitney suggests they get it over with, and see if they like it or they don’t, subtlety not being his strong suit.

Shep is getting that weird artist girl to do another painting of him. Chelsea and Austen go out on the deck. Shep acts stupid with the girls. In her interview, Cameran says that, instead of going after Chelsea, in typical Shep fashion, Shep is acting like a horny St. Bernard. He tells Cameran that he’s walking away, and she wonders why he’s even talking about it. He says he doesn’t want to ruin friendships.

Chelsea asks Austen how he feels about their relationship; she’s all about seeing where it goes. She says she likes him, and he says that’s great news.

Cameran says that Shep has a hard time showing his feelings, and he’s going to end up alone with a fridge full of beer. Shep says this is him; he isn’t hiding any inner feelings. Cameran thinks he’s lying, and Shep tells her that she’s wrong.

Next time, an altercation between Jennifer and Kathryn, Thomas thinks he’s lost his judgement skills (if he ever had them), Shep talks to Austen about Chelsea, Shep confronts Austen, and Craig tells Naomie that she’s acting dumb. Again I say, unless he’s not paying back borrowed money, or not paying his share of the bills, who cares what career path, or not, he decides to take?

🍹 Andy had promised all hell would break loose on Watch What Happens Live tonight. It wasn’t quite that, but it was a lot of fun. The guests were Patricia Altschul from Southern Charm and Kelly Osbourne. The best part was Patricia wearing a caftan with a sparkly collar and Pug Chauncy’s face all over it. And she has a line of things she can make for you too! She even presented Andy with Wacha PJs. I did want to yell at the TV a couple of times though. One being when Patricia agreed with Thomas ignoring the kids at the polo match, claiming that polo is a dangerous game, and he really needed to concentrate. I would actually buy that, if it weren’t for Thomas whining that he couldn’t please everyone. Andy also let Kelly plead the fifth twice, which just isn’t right. You can check out Patricia’s pet line at: http://patriciascouture.com/?gclid=CI_Y8dvqvtMCFc9MDQodXoYIhg

😯 In what could possibly be a future unfortunate identity crisis, there is a person named Patricia Couture, who made headlines with some scandal, so if you google it, make sure you put in Patricia‘s Couture or add Altschul.

PatriciaAltschulPetCaftans

 

April 23, 2017 – N’once Upon a Time & the End of a Feud

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

I didn’t see much TV today, and will have to go On Demand with Once Upon a Time, because I had the pleasure of going to a production of The Little Foxes by Lillian Hellman on Broadway with an old friend. (Thanks, Michael!) Stars Laura Linney and Cynthia Nixon alternated the female lead roles, and we saw Laura as Regina, and Cynthia as Birdie. I had wanted to see this having seen Laura on stage before in Les Liasons Dangereuses years ago. While I know she’s done a million films, I honestly couldn’t name one of them, but she blew me away on stage. She did not disappoint in this drama either – she took hold of the stage on commanded it. The rest of the cast was excellent as well, Richard Thomas especially surprised me. While I don’t dislike him, I’ve never been what I’d call a fan, but thought his portrayal of Horace was superb. The sets were incredibly impressive as well. If you’re interested, there’s more info here: https://www.manhattantheatreclub.com/2016-17-season/little-foxes/

LILLIAN HELLMAN’S THE LITTLE FOXES
Directed by Daniel Sullivan
With Laura Linney, Cynthia Nixon
Darren Goldstein, Michael McKean, Richard Thomas
David Alford, Michael Benz, Francesca Carpanini, Caroline Stefanie Clay, Charles Turner

This is also a good segue into the one thing I did watch. Bette Davis starred as Regina in the film version of The Little Foxes, and I got home just in time to catch the final chapter of Feud: Bette and Joan. The episode was titled, You mean all this time we could have been friends? referring to a line at the end of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? The careers and health of both stars are going downhill, BD wants nothing to do with Bette, and Joan has been left pretty much alone. One of the saddest moments of the previous episode was Mamacita finally leaving her, having had enough of her abuse. After the film disaster that was Trog (I actually remember seeing that in the movie theater), Joan retires totally, and Mamacita returns part-time. There was a heart-breaking fantasy sequence, where Joan (Susan Sarandon), Bette (Jessica Lange), Jack Warner (Stanley Tucci), and Hedda Hopper (Judy Davis) are playing cards. When Joan calls Mamacita to pour the champagne, we see that it’s all in her head. The takeaway I got, was that despite her animosity, Joan craved Bette’s friendship, and while Bette did respect her as an actress, she couldn’t be the friend that Joan wanted. The entire cast was fantastic, but special kudos to Dominic Burgess for doing a spot on Victor Buono.

Victor: Give us this day, our daily slice, but cut it thin and toast it twice. (The Fat Man’s Prayer)

Joan: Stars are like Christmas trees. After the lights go out, you sit there and watch the needles drop.

Bette: My mother told me to never say anything ill about the dead. Only good. Joan Crawford is dead? Good.

FuedBette&amp;Joan

April 21, 2017 – Carly Declares War, Camelot Crumbles & Don’t Call Ronda Fat

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Dante goes to Alexis’s place and Sam answers the door. He tells her that he wants to ask Alexis some follow-up questions.

Ava sees Julian in the interrogation room. He says the sooner she gets him out the better. She says the last time she was there, he refused to help her. She wants a good reason why she shouldn’t return the favor.

Elizabeth wonders what Jake is hiding, and if he’s really afraid of Jason.

Jason hopes this year is better than the last, and Sonny says it couldn’t be worse. He says as soon as Jax is gone, he can work on it. Jason asks why he thinks Jax would be going anywhere.

He thinks so because the immigration officer tells Jax his visa has been revoked. He says Jax was arrested for a crime of moral turpitude. He was alleged to be involved in organ trafficking, and that’s enough to start deportation proceedings. Jax tells Carly his attorney will clear it up, and goes with the officer. Carly says she’ll clear it up.

Jason says that Sonny did something, and he probably doesn’t want to know. Elizabeth calls and asks Jason to come over; something is up with Jake. Jason tells Sonny to be careful how he plays this thing with Carly, and don’t do something he can’t take back.

Julian tells Ava that he’s been running from their demented sister. Ava asks if he has any idea what he put her through. The only reason she’s still alive is that Dante arrested her, and the only person who knew the truth did nothing to stop it. Julian says Olivia was threatening his family, and what would she have done if it was Kiki? Ava flashes back to switching the pills. She says a Jerome does whatever they have to do to protect their own. Julian asks if she’s going to help him, and Scotty comes in. He says it’s good to see Julian among the living. He got him acquitted when he was facing the trifecta of felonies, and he’ll do it again.

Dante tells Sam that Julian confessed to holding Alexis hostage. Alexis overhears, and thinks about getting busy with Julian. Sam says she’ll get Alexis to the station, and Dante leaves. Alexis thanks Sam for the save. Sam says she’s not off the hook with her questions though, and asks what she and Julian did last night. Really?

Jason arrives at Elizabeth’s place. She tells him that Jake has been talking to Franco about his sessions. She shows Jason the timeline, saying that Jake left it at the studio. Jason asks if the boy in the drawing is supposed to be Jake, and that he must be hiding from the scarecrow. Elizabeth tells him about Jake being scared of him.

Sam doesn’t have a problem believing that Julian might kidnap Alexis, but wonders why he’d take her to a hotel room. She wants the truth. Kristina and Molly walk in. They’ve brought food and DVDs. Molly says it’s all about the Davis women today. Sam tells Alexis they’re not done with the conversation.

Scotty tells Ava she has to leave. Ava tells Julian that despite his recent disloyalty, she loves him.

Carly storms into Sonny’s house and accuses him of trying to have Jax deported.

Elizabeth says she and Jake ran into Franco at the hospital. She tells Jason about Jake not wanting them to see the scarecrow. Jake walks in.

Sam interrupts the Davis women’s viewing pleasure to tell everyone that Alexis has to make a statement at the station. Kristina says everyone knows what Julian did, and wonders why Alexis has to be put through it again. She says that Julian does whatever it takes to save himself.

Ava sees Dante at the station. They talk about Julian being alive  – Dante calling it the miracle they’ve all been waiting for – and Dante tells Ava she can get her stuff back from the robbery. He still wonders how Morgan’s pills ended up at The Floating Rib. Ava says it’s one of life’s mysteries, and Dante thinks Sonny won’t rest until he gets the truth.

Sonny tells Carly that unfortunately, Jax broke the law, so he can be deported. Carly says it’s all about payback, and asks if he stopped to think about Josslyn. He says they’re not going to hold Jax at some detention center; he’ll go back to Australia on a nice plane, and she can visit when she wants. Carly tells him that’s her daughters father, and if Jax suffers the consequences, so will Sonny, and believe her, they’ll be consequences.

Molly is worried about Alexis, but she says she’s fine. She tells them there’s more to the situation than they know. She says she’s confused, and Molly wonders if she’s defending Julian again. Alexis says his motives are complex. Molly says he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. Alexis tells them that she’s more tired than she realized, and was hoping this was over. Sam asks the other girls to give Alexis some breathing room. They leave, and Alexis says she shouldn’t have said that. Sam asks because of Kristina or Julian. She tells Alexis that it’s probably easier to tell the truth, and that Julian didn’t hold her hostage. Alexis admits that he didn’t.

Scotty tells Julian that he shouldn’t have said he kidnapped Alexis. Julian says it doesn’t matter; all they have to do is question Alexis. Scotty says she has so many skeletons in her closet, he just has to pick one to discredit her. Julian tells him that Alexis has been hurt enough, and Scotty can’t use her in the defense. After He’s cleared, he’s leaving Port Charles. Scotty says as his attorney, he thinks Julian should take a plea bargain, and he’s going to spend a long time in Pentenville.

Carly wanted to take the high road, but Sonny took the first shot, so now it’s war. She says she’s going to win, and he says they’ll see. She tells him to enjoy his birthday – alone. She reminds him about last year and how they celebrated with the family, and how close they were. She says it’s amazing what a difference a year makes.

Elizabeth says Jason dropped by for a visit. She goes to get something from the kitchen, and Jason asks how school is. Jake says boring, and Jason talks about summer coming. He brings up the action figures and says what he discusses with Andre is private, but if there’s anything he wants to talk about, he can always talk to him. Jake says he knows, and Jason says he has the feeling he’s afraid of him. Jake says Jason isn’t the one he’s scared of. Jason asks who Jake is afraid of, but he sees Elizabeth. Jason says he’s afraid of someone, but it wasn’t him. Jason thinks he knows what’s going on.

Alexis tells Sam that when she saw the park photo, she went to the pier to find closure, but found Julian instead. She felt relieved, and went with him. When everyone showed up, he said she was his hostage so she wouldn’t be implicated. She has to live with that. Sam says she should bring Diane along when she makes her statement. She can confirm the lie, or implicate herself.

Julian says there must be something Scotty can do. Scotty says that Julian was only an accessory, and then he admitted to kidnapping Alexis all on his own. He has nothing up his sleeve, unless Julian wants to recant. Julian says he did what he did, and he’s the only one who should pay for it.

Dante visits Sonny. He gives him the bottle of pills. In what looks like a repurposed Twizzlers bag. Sonny asks if the case is closed, and Dante says as of this morning. They have zero leverage, since the robbers took a plea bargain. Sonny wonders how the pills ended up at the restaurant, and Dante says he does too. Sonny asks if there’s something Dante isn’t saying.

Scotty tells Ava that Julian is going to be the death of him. Ava says they have bigger problems, and that Dante was taunting her. Scotty says he took care of that, and she has nothing to worry about. Ava says whether there’s lithium or breath mints in it, Sonny will want to know why the pills were at The Floating Rib.

Sonny doesn’t understand how Morgan’s pills could be there six months later. Dante says it doesn’t seem likely. Sonny says that Carly was convinced there was something going on. She thought maybe Morgan wasn’t taking the medication, and they were going to get to the bottom of it. He says they were a great team, and it’s amazing how things change.

Carly finds Jax there when she gets home. She tells him that Sonny is the one who tipped them off. He says it doesn’t matter; they were within their rights to detain him until he goes home. They agreed to let him go, providing he leaves the country tonight and never returns.

Sam tells Scout she’s worried about her grandmother because she’s in love with Julian. She says normally loving someone would be okay, but she’s not sure about this.

Alexis gets to the station. She sees Julian. They stare at each other, making soap opera faces.

Carly tells Jax that it doesn’t make any sense; it wouldn’t hold up in court. He says there’s no case to argue. He’ll appeal, but it will take a long time. He wants her and Josslyn to come to Australia with him. I’m in.

Sonny says Morgan wrote in his journal that the pills weren’t working, and Carly wanted to know why. Then they could stop blaming themselves. Dante says Morgan was sick; there was nothing they could do to change that. Sonny says he should have seen what was going on from the beginning. Dante has to do police business. He tells Sonny happy birthday. Sonny looks at the bottle of pills. I swear there were more in it when Ava switched them.

Scotty says that Sonny will find medication in the bottle, and Ava asks where he got them. Scotty tells her a pharmacy where he has a friend. Ava asks what if the friend talks. Scotty says that Sonny will find lithium prescribed for Morgan in the bottle. Ava says there’s no reason for Sonny to look further.

Sonny makes a call. He needs to see someone about his son.

Elizabeth sits on the couch with Jake and Jason, showing Jake a photo album. They look at a picture of him as a baby and one of Elizabeth when she first met Jason. Elizabeth asks Jake if he recognizes someone, and he looks freaked out.

Tomorrow, Alexis makes her statement, Olivia-F visits Julian, and the Quartermaines can only protect Samira for so long.

👑 I watched the miniseries The Kennedys: After Camelot on Reelz, and it was excellent. The casting was spot on, and Katie Holmes is surprisingly good as Jackie. I absolutely loved the wardrobe and sets too, but there’s one gripe I had – the actresses’ foreheads. As I’m watching Ted Kennedy (Matthew Perry) talk to Joan (Kristen Hager) about running for president, all of a sudden, I’m thinking that she looks awfully youthful for what her age should be. Then I take a better look, and realize that the actress must be doing Botox. Now that I’ve noticed this, it’s like trying not to think about elephants, and I’m looking at all of their foreheads.

That being said, this was a wonderful trip down Kennedy Memory Lane. I love the time period, because I grew up on the fringes of it. I was quite small when all this was happening, but loved celebrity gossip early in life, and later on, lived in NYC during the same time period as Jackie and John, although we never crossed paths that I know of. The ending was like a knife in my heart, leaving me to wonder if the dream really did die when John did. Many people obviously put a lot of work into this miniseries, and I applaud their efforts.

Quotes of the Week

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.Albert Einstein

She’d change her name to “TV Listings” just to get it in the paper.Donald Sutherland as Bob Garvin in Disclosure

I swear to God, if anyone calls me fat one more time in my life, I’m going to kill them. — Ronda Rousey, the New York Times, October 2015

PeaceLoveEarth

April 20, 2017 – Jax is Sprung, Sushi is Made & Judge Judy Says It All

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Elizabeth tells Jason that it was a productive follow-up with Andre, and Jason agrees. They talk about presenting a united front. Jason says they won’t let anyone or anything get in the way of Jake’s progress.

Franco tells Kiki that he thinks Jake is in serious trouble.

Tracy tells Finn that she needs a DNA test. He passes for a friend in her life, and she needs someone she can trust. He asks who it’s for.

An immigration officer comes to the door at the Quartermaine mansion. He tells Monica that he’s looking for Samira, whose visa has expired. He asks if she’s there.

Michael tells Sonny that Jax is being released. Sonny says he wasn’t even in there ten minutes. He wonders why Jax is getting off scot-free.

Carly says Nelle might want to believe she’s a better person, but she’ll destroy what she loves most, so don’t try loving Michael. She knows the real Nelle, and sees her coming. She’ll do whatever it takes to stop her. Nelle asks when it’s going to be enough, and Carly says never. She tells Nelle to get it through her head, and stay away from her son.

Finn tells Tracy that he’s been suspended and is on probation. If he orders a questionable DNA test, he’s finished. Tracy wonders what happened to the renegade that she liked. Finn says he took drugs and got caught. Tracy says he owes her a favor.

Franco tells Kiki that Jake is paralyzingly afraid.

Michael says Sonny should be thankful. Jason walks in and asks what they’re talking about. Because being nosy is the main occupation in Port Charles. Sonny brings him up to speed about Jax. Michael says Jax was arrested in front of Carly and Josslyn, but he’s been released. Maybe Carly can forgive Sonny in fifty years. He tells Sonny that the people most affected are Avery and Josslyn, and he’s not looking at the big picture. Sonny says Avery is a baby, and Michael says she’s going to notice Carly isn’t around. He’s decides to go to the station.

Nelle tells Carly that Michael didn’t get his compassion from her. Carly says she’s happy Nelle is doing right by Jax, but it doesn’t absolve her. She used Morgan’s death to mess with Carly, and she can’t forgive that. Jax walks out and thanks Nelle. He says he’s sorry for everything.  He tells Nelle his offer of help for a fresh start is always on the table. She says Port Charles is home to her now, and she’s not going anywhere.

Monica tells the officer that she has a lot of security, and if someone was on the grounds, she’d know. He asks if he can look around, and she asks if he has a warrant. He wonders why he’d need one, and says if she’s harboring a fugitive, she’ll be charged. He leaves, and Dillon says that was intense. Samira thanks Monica. Dillon says she just made the entire house complicit, and what do they do when Officer Stick-in-the-Mud comes back?

Tracy tells Finn about all the things she’s done for him.  He reminds her that he once saved her life. She says she needs his help again. He asks what’s so important, and she says it involves her family.

Franco tells Kiki that the drawing is more than a scarecrow to Jake. He tells her about Jake losing it over his parents knowing. He says he must be scared of Jason. Kiki asks if he’s more interested in helping Jake or in Jason being the bad guy? He says helping Jake. Kiki asks if he’s talked to Elizabeth, but he says no. Elizabeth appears, and says the usual – talk to her about what?

Jason tells Sonny that the harder it is on Jax, the harder it will be on Sonny. Sending him to prison isn’t the answer, and Carly won’t be happy. He says Sonny is lucky. Jason has come bearing scotch, and wishes Sonny a happy birthday. He tells Sonny that Julian is alive, and he’s been arrested.

Samira thanks Monica again. Dillon wonders who tipped him off. Samira says the monks wouldn’t have done it. She only came because she was desperate, and had no ill intent. She wonders if it was Tracy, since she doesn’t want to part with the painting.

Tracy explains about the painting to Finn. She says while her father was in hiding, he found it. In typical fashion, he gave and took away in the same breath. She tells Finn that she has a sneaking suspicion that Samira is Edward’s illegitimate daughter. She repeats Samira’s story, but says she doesn’t think Samira knows that they might be related. Tracy says she doesn’t want to give up the painting.

Kiki tells Elizabeth that they were talking about the Nurses Ball, and Franco wants to perform again. He says he caught the bug. Elizabeth asks Kiki about her classes, and they make small talk. Kiki says she’ll see Franco at home, and goes back to work. Or whatever she does. Elizabeth says they weren’t talking about the Nurses Ball, and Franco admits that they weren’t.

Jason tells Sonny at least they can be sure Julian will stay behind bars. His excuse that his sister made him do it isn’t going to fly in court. Sonny says Carly slept with Jax, and any chance he gets to make Jax’s life miserable, he’s taking it. Jason suggests he leave Jax alone. Sonny says when Jason is right, he’s right. Which is usually the kind of thing Sonny says before he does what he wants.

Michael sees Nelle at the station. Nelle says they wanted her statement about Jax, and Michael offers to pay her to keep quiet. She sees Jax and Carly come in, says she’s good, and jets.

Michael says Josslyn must be relieved, and asks Jax how he pulled it off. Jax says Nelle refused to say anything. Carly says that Nelle did one decent thing, and it’s the least she owes them. She tells Michael that Sonny threw Jax to the wolves for something he would have done himself. Michael says even if she wants to tear his head off, for his sisters’ sakes, don’t be so focused on getting back at him. Jax thinks they should call a truce, but Carly says she’ll have to think about it.  Carly and Jax leave.

Jason says Julian is finally getting what he deserves. Sonny says he’ll believe it when he sees it. Sonny sends Jason to the kitchen for ice, and calls someone. He needs a favor.

Elizabeth asks what Franco and Kiki were really talking about. Franco wants to tell her, but doesn’t want to betray Jake’s trust again. She loves that he’s devoted, but says he’s not betraying Jake by keeping his mother informed. She tells him about the meeting with Andre. Franco says Jake is never going to be comfortable if he’s afraid of his father.

Finn says Tracy has a first world problem, whereas Samira has a third world problem. Tracy says it’s not hers to fix. Finn says it is, and Tracy says only if she’s telling the truth. She says her father only left her a jar of relish in his will, and she thought he didn’t love her. She was wrong, and asks if she’s a bad person for wanting to keep the painting. Finn says Samira needs it, and if she’s really Tracy’s sister… Tracy says that’s where he comes in. He asks how she wants it to turn out, and she says she doesn’t want them to be related.

Dillon and Monica agree that it wasn’t Tracy who alerted the officer. Dillon asks Samira if she can think of anyone else, but she can’t. Monica wants to extend Samira’s visa, but Samira says she has to take the painting home. She can’t lose her daughter to those monsters.

Tracy says it’s not that she doesn’t want to take on Samira’s problems, but it means her father cheated while they were grieving him. She doesn’t want to be related to Samira, solve the human trafficking problem, or give away the painting. When she read her father’s letter, everything was all right with the world. She’ll come up with money for Samira to rescue her daughter some other way. The painting means everything – it’s changed her perspective. Finn asks what she has, and she gives him the glass. She says she’s not going to beg, but she’s asking him to help her.

Franco tells Elizabeth that she saw how upset Jake was when he’d shown her and Jason the drawing. He wanted to apologize to Jake, and Jake totally lost it. He didn’t want his parents to know about the scarecrow, but Elizabeth had already seen it. He’s afraid of Jason

On the phone, Sonny says to tell him when it’s done. Jason joins him again. Sonny asks how Sam is doing concerning Julian. Jason says she’s worried about Alexis. He says Julian is going away for a long time, and Sonny toasts to the legal system. Ha-ha!

Carly and Jax get home. She says she can’t believe Sonny did that. She says it’s a cheap shot just after Jax’s mother died. She understands there’s no love lost between them, but he didn’t think about anyone else. Jax says he did what he did, and the only reason he’s not in jail is because of Nelle. As far as fallout goes, it’s minor. He points out no charges were filed, and their daughter is alive and well. Carly tells him he’s right. She apologizes to him. She says the whole mess with Sonny is because he was lashing out at her. She asks if there’s anything she can do for him, and he says there is something.

Nelle is waiting for the ferry, and Michael sees her. He asks why she didn’t tell him at the station. She didn’t see the point, since he’d already made up his mind about her. He thanks her for not having Jax prosecuted, and says he’s sorry he misjudged her.

Samira asks if Monica has daughters. Monica says she had two, but they’re no longer with her. She says she’s going to find a way to get Samira out of the country with the painting.

Finn tells Tracy that he’ll do it, but if he loses his medical license or Hayden – explaining that he’s already lost her, but if he gets her back and loses her again – he’s going to be very, very angry for a long, long, long time.

Franco tells Elizabeth that this is real. For some reason, Jake doesn’t want Jason to see the scarecrow. She says Jason is a good father – kind, patient, and devoted. Whatever Jake is feeling isn’t true. Franco says that it is for him, and it’s keeping him from saying what happened on the island.

Sonny babbles about pouring his heart out to Carly, and Jax coming downstairs buttoning up his shirt. He says Jax needs to stay out of it. He needs to get out of the country. Yep. I just put two and two together. Phone call needing a favor + Sonny’s animosity toward Jax.

Michael tells Nelle that he was wrong to think the worst. She asks if he’s always been this fair, and wishes she could think that clearly. A seagull poops on her (I’m not kidding), and Michael helps clean it off, saying it’s good luck. She says she’ll take what she can get. The ferry comes, and they wish each other a good day. I wonder why it’s not nighttime already. Longest. Day. Ever.

Jax wants to go snow camping. Carly says cozy is the snow being outside. He tells her that they’re going to forage for twigs and berries, and she says that’s not happening. He says she’d probably be the one to fight off a bear and survive, and we all think about Erica Kane. The doorbell rings, and Officer Stick-in-the-Mud asks for Jax. He wants Jax to come with him immediately. Honestly, I don’t think this is how any of that works.

Tomorrow, Julian wants a favor from Ava, the immigration officer tells Jax that he’s no longer welcome in this country, and Sam asks Alexis what happened between her and Julian.

🍣 Tonight, on MasterChef Junior, Chef Edward Lee was a guest judge. He rocks! I was also impressed with his rodeo-style shirt. The first challenge was for the contestants to make a dish inspired by their families. The presentations alone were enough to make the average cook hang up their spatula. Next was replicating a sushi platter. Not like Captain Picard replicates things; they actually had to put it together. Presentation here went from “a nightmare on a plate” to Chef Lee being astounded that a thirteen and eleven-year-old could create such amazing sushi. It’s okay, kids who went home, even though your sushi platter was a mess, I couldn’t have even gotten the rice to stick together. Next time the thrills and spills from past seasons, along with, where are they now?

🍤 The f Word starts on May 31st.

👌 I’m With Her

If people had lives, they wouldn’t have so much time to spend being nasty on the internet.Judge Judy (I’m paraphrasing, but that’s pretty much what she said.)

April 19, 2017 – Conscious Coupling & Un in PC, NYC’s Wives Invade the Hamptons & Some Extra Stuff

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Jordan’s knight in shining armor, Curtis, arrives. He tells her the armor is spiritual. He has something amazing in mind, and holds up a leather bag.

Tracy mulls over Samira giving her Edward’s journal. There’s nothing in it to explain why Samira’s mother had it. Tracy looks into a box, and takes out a carrying case that says ELQ on it. Monica startles her, saying she knows what Tracy is doing, and to be honest for everyone’s sake.

Brad hassles Finn. He says Finn should have been booted from the hospital. Finn tells him to take it to Monica. Brad says he only got off the hook because he donated the money to the hospital. Finn gets the glory, while Brad is out of a condo. Finn suggests Brad repeat everything while he does this – and walks away. He runs into Griff, who says he’s Finn’s new supervisor.

Michael asks Sonny if he’s still thinking about going to South America. He says Sonny should leave Port Charles immediately, before the mess he made gets worse.

At the station, Carly tells Jax that Josslyn wants her to help with anything possible, so she’s gotten him an attorney. She opens the door to the interrogation room, and Nelle is there.

Tracy asks Monica how she’s not being honest. Monica says she’s grieving for her father all over again. Tracy says it’s time to face the ugly truth; Monica has learned how to read her. She says she’s trying to prove things in her own way. Samira appears, and thanks them for putting her up for the night. Tracy says she’s thought of new possibilities. Samira thinks she’s rethinking the painting, but Tracy explains that it can be traced back to her because she declared it with customs. She says even if it was possible, she’s not giving up her father’s legacy.

Hayden looks at a picture of her and Finn on her phone.

Griff is responsible for Finn’s drug testing. He says he’s not judging, and he’s there for Finn. Finn says he gets it. Griff has the thankless job of watching while he pees in a cup, but he doesn’t have to share his feelings; he doesn’t need a priest. Brad acts all skanky, listening from around the corner.

Michael tells Sonny that Jax was incarcerated overnight. He says Sonny put the whole thing in motion. Sonny says that Jax did that a long time ago, and now he has to pay.

Nathan tells Carly that Nelle has to make a statement. Nelle says she wants everyone to hear what she has to say.

Griff tells Finn that if he pushes away everyone trying to help, his recovery is going to be difficult. Brad takes notes.

Curtis produces a bowling ball. Jordan asks for pointers. Curtis gives her the ball, and some tips. She drops it, and it rolls away. She says she’s sorry to her neighbors downstairs, and Curtis says they’d better get used to noise. They start to kiss, but TJ knocks on the door.

Monica asks for a moment with Tracy. She tells Tracy that she knows how important the painting is, but this is an extreme situation. Tracy brings up the customs issue, and Monica says that if Samira gets caught, they can say she stole it. Tracy says that if Samira ends up in prison, that would be making a bad situation worse. Monica says she’s right, and Tracy wants that for her ringtone. She says it’s happening too fast. Samira showed up out of the blue and for all they know, she’s working with Larry. Monica suggests asking her some more questions.

Monica sits Samira down and says they want to know about her family life. Samira says she’d rather talk about their family. She sees how much Tracy loved her father, and talks about his kind eyes. Tracy says that Samira doesn’t know anything about Edward and never will.

Finn comes to Hayden’s office. He wants to talk about their last conversation. She says he needs to focus on his rehabilitation, and unless it’s hospital business, there’s nothing to discuss. He says compared to not talking to her getting off drugs should be easy. He’s wondering if when he gets through this, if she would give him a chance to make things right between them.

Nathan starts recording Nelle’s statement.

Griff asks Brad what he wants. Brad says it gives him no pleasure, but he feels it’s his duty to tell him what he knows about Finn.

Finn isn’t asking Hayden to be there while he’s in rehab, but wants to know if he’ll have a chance later. She says she’s been thinking about her decisions. She tells him how her father had always insisted on a huge Passover celebration, and he would talk about family, work, and unity, and how hard work pays off. Meanwhile, he was ripping people off right and left. All that talk about what truly mattered was a lie, and she ended up just like him, a liar and a user. Then she met Finn, but even though he brings out the best in her, she can’t make promises she might not be able to keep.

Tracy tells Samira that Monica forgot her manners, and Monica says people often wonder if she was raised by wolves. Tracy says that Monica married into the pack, but she requested breakfast for Samira. Tracy asks if she would like some orange juice, but Samira says she couldn’t eat a thing.

Michael asks Sonny why have Jax arrested for something he would have done himself? Sonny says that wasn’t his intention; he only wanted the confession as leverage. Michael wonders for what, since he wanted Jax to leave. Michael says that Jax isn’t the reason that Sonny and Carly broke up. Sonny says the reason is over; he didn’t sleep with Nelle. Michael says it’s about Morgan.

We don’t hear Nelle’s whole statement, but she ends with saying that she won’t be pursuing legal action. Carly asks if Jax is free to go, but Nathan says not yet. Carly says she’ll be back, leaving Jax and Nelle alone. Jax asks Nelle why.

Carly asks Nathan if it was enough. She says Sonny has a recording of Jax’s alleged confession, but she wants to know if Jax can be prosecuted using Nelle’s statement.

TJ returns Jordan’s laptop that he borrowed. He says he finished up early, and asks if they’re a couple now. They both stammer, and TJ says he’s been there. Jordan says they were just discussing going on their first date. They haven’t figured out if it’s serious yet, but would he be okay with that?

Tracy understands that Samira is worried and can’t eat. She says she’s the same way, but starving herself isn’t going to help her or her daughter. Samira asks for some water, and Tracy gets it. Geez, could she spare it? There’s like two inches in the glass. She says that she got Samira some new clothes and maybe she’d like to change. Monica leaves to make some calls.

Samira thanks Tracy for her generosity. She was hoping to convince Tracy of her sincerity. with the journal and ring. Tracy says she’d be happy to compensate her, but Samira says her father would want her to have them. Tracy says he wanted her to have the painting. Samira says maybe they can explore some other solutions. When she goes upstairs, Tracy puts the water glass in a plastic bag.

Griff tells Brad that he’s not at liberty to discuss Finn, and it would be inappropriate for Brad to ask about him. Brad says he’s on his way to the lab, and he’ll take the sample there, as he takes it from Griff’s hand. Why is Griff letting him do that??? Especially after what he just said.

Finn tells Hayden that he’s sorry for the interruption. He’ll send her a budgetary proposal through interoffice mail, so she doesn’t have to see him. Hayden says in order to stay clean, he has to follow the rules, and asks if he can do it.

Michael tells Sonny that if Morgan was still alive, he and Carly wouldn’t be doing this. They never did this kind of damage, and she’s forgiven him for worse than Nelle. She can’t get past it because Morgan is dead. When she wouldn’t forgive him, Sonny did something worse. He wanted to push her away, but it’s not going to lessen the grief; it will only add to it.

Nelle tells Jax that there are a lot of reasons why she wants to let it go, but she doesn’t want to hurt Josslyn anymore. She says what happened is on her father, not Jax. Jax says he’s still partly to blame. Nelle says he was willing to do anything for his daughter, and her father saw her as a way to get money. She’s not going to punish him for doing what she would have wanted her father to do. She tells him to tell Josslyn. She says something bad happened to her, and she had the choice to do something good, but instead chose to feed her own anger, lashing out and hurting people. She ended up hurting herself just as badly. She says an old friend told her that you can carry hurt with you or focus on the good and move on, and she’s trying to do that.

Nathan tells Carly that if victim refuses to testify, it shouldn’t go any further.

Finn tells Hayden not to worry. She says that she needs to know he’ll stick with it, with or without her. He says he’ll be fine with her or not. He leaves, and Griff walks in, wanting to talk about the budget. He can see that Hayden is upset, and he says he knows she’s worried about Finn. Well, she should be more worried than she is, since Griff is so loosey-goosey with Finn’s drug test.

TJ tells Jordan that the situation is odd, but he loves the both of them, and wants them to be happy. He hopes it works out, since it will be awkward if it doesn’t. He’s got to leave, and Curtis tells him be good, study hard, and you are the future. Curtis tells Jordan that they had to tell TJ, and that he seemed surprised, but he’s basically coming around. Jordan says he’s concerned about what happens if it doesn’t work out, and Curtis says she seems like she is too. She admits that she is.

Tracy sees Finn at the hospital. She says a situation has come up where she needs his help.

Michael tells Sonny that Josslyn is heartbroken. She already lost Morgan. He says Sonny isn’t thinking with his right mind. He’s grieving, and it’s messing with judgement and sense of perspective. It has nothing to do with him being bi-polar, but losing his son. Michael says he needs to find a better way to deal with the loss, rather than hurting everyone Morgan loved. Michael tells Sonny that he can try to fix it, but first he needs to know where Jax is in regard to the charges.

Nathan tells Carly that he’s taking Jax to the lawyer. Carly has something to say to Nelle.

Jordan tells Curtis they’ve been through a lot. Her attraction to him is definitely real, and they’ve both made a lot of mistakes in life. If they start this, and it blows up in their faces, she doesn’t want it to destroy their friendship. Curtis says that he shares her concern. She asks what now? He says there’s only one way to find out if it’s a mistake or real – do some serious bowling. I love Curtis.

Hayden says she can’t discuss it right now. Griff understands, but he’s hoping for the best. He thinks if Finn stays on the straight and narrow, it will be fine.

Tracy asks Finn to focus. She needs a DNA test done.

Monica wonders where Tracy went. The doorbell rings. It’s a man looking for Samira. He wants to speak to her now.

Michael tells Sonny that Jax is being released.

Carly thanks Nelle for not pressing charges, and Nelle says she wants the pain to stop. Carly says she’s on to her now. Almost everything Nelle has done, she did too. She says that Nelle wants to look good for Michael. She wants Michael to think he’s gotten through to her and she’s changed. She may want to believe she’s good enough for Michael, but she’s a damaged, screwed up little girl, who will end up trashing everything good she’s given. Carly says she’ll do everything she can to stop her.

Tomorrow, Tracy wants no questions asked, Franco thinks Jake is in serious trouble, and Nelle asks Carly when it’s going to be enough.

I have to mention how annoying it is to me when Carly says Nelle is just like her, then denies her the same graciousness that she ended up getting. She slept with her mother’s husband, for Pete’s sake. (Who is Pete anyway?) I’m sure I could look for some deep-seated psychological reason, such as Carly really doesn’t like herself, and is treating the Nelle the way she thinks she should really be treated, but I don’t have time.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Luann and Dorinda go to Luann’s house in Sag Harbor. Bethenny and Carole are staying at Bethenny’s place, and Bethenny is threatening to lock up Carole and Donald Trump in the guest house together. Bethenny talks to Carole about Sonja being bitter because she wasn’t invited to the Berkshires.

Sonja tells Tinsley about the talk she had with Luann. In her interview, Tinsley says if Sonja wants a friendship with Luann, she’ll have to drop talking about Tom.

Dorinda tells Luann that Sonja keeps talking smack about her. Luann tells her that Tinsley is living with Sonja right now. Dorinda says Sonja keeps talking about being sober, but for all they know, she could be drinking tequila through of a crazy straw at this very moment. She received a picture of Sonja and a stripper at Luann’s shower, and thinks Sonja’s life is in chaos.

Tinsley asks Sonja how she’s going to feel about seeing Dorinda. Sonja regrets not having her at the tea party, and says that two wrongs don’t make a right. Sonja and Tinsley compare underwear.

Carole wants a mellow weekend, since she has election stress. She’s feeling malaise. Please. She talks about Ramona getting irritated with her at the tea party when she was talking about the election. In her interview, Carole says Ramona isn’t interested in politics, and Bethenny says it’s all Carole talks about – all roads lead to the election. She adds that Carole doesn’t want to talk to anyone who isn’t on what she perceives as her political level. I can tell I’ll be gritting my teeth through this season, the same way I do when I go to Facebook.

Luann, daughter Victoria, and Dorinda go for a boat ride. Dorinda misses having a boat. They talk about Luann losing her countess title, which just now dawned on her daughter. In her interview, Luann says that Countess is part of who she is, and once a countess, always a countess. We all admire the fall colors in Sag Harbor.

Carole and Bethenny go for some acupuncture. Can they stick a needle in Carole’s brain so that she stops talking? Carole tells the acupuncturist that she’s stressed. In her interview, Bethenny says she’s never heard Carole say she’s stressed, and has wondered at times if she even had a pulse. Bethenny gets something done on her back. The acupuncturist looks at Carole’s tongue, and she also shows him fungus on her toe. Bethenny tells her that he’s not a podiatrist, and he’s like yeah, you need a different kind of healer for that. In her interview, Carole says Bethenny is in a secret, quiet hell due to suckerfish ex Jason Hoppy. Bethenny gets some cupping done. She wonders if Luann is going to say anything about the Tom thing in Miami when they get together, but Carole thinks she’ll keep it moving rather than face having a real conversation.

Bethenny and Carole arrive first for dinner. They see Ramona’s ex business partner at another table. Ramona arrives from visiting Avery. She claims the kids in Avery’s dorm look at her as a friend, but my guess is that they look at her as an anomaly, and probably an embarrassment. They look at pictures on Ramona’s phone while she fishes for compliments.

Dorinda and Luann arrive. Dorinda is anxious. She hasn’t seen Bethenny since the reunion, and there was a lot of tension. She and Carole talk about the election being scary, stressful, and close. They move on, discussing Luann’s house addition. Bethenny asks Ramona if she’s coming to the election party, but she feels like Carole already hit her over the head with it. Bethenny says that Carole doesn’t want people there who aren’t “informed,” and Ramona says everyone has their own interpretation. In her interview, Carole says her party is bi-partisan and everyone is invited…sort of. Huh? I certainly can’t imagine it being bi-partisan in any way.

Ramona asks Bethenny if her daughter has been approached by anyone since Bethenny did “soft porn” in her past, and it was in the tabloids recently. I missed that. She says yes, Diane Sawyer tracked her daughter down at the schoolyard. Ramona expresses concern, but Bethenny blows it off. In her interview, Bethenny says if anyone had brought it up, she would have just made some self-deprecating remarks, but Ramona is trying to embarrass her and has hit a new low. She says she needed the money and had wanted to be an actress at one time. Ramona says she doesn’t like Bethenny being defensive. Bethenny says it was a cheesy movie where she was a murderer. Ramona is all insulted because Bethenny doesn’t care. In her interview, Ramona says good friends should be able to ask each other questions. Luann says she doesn’t think Bethenny wanted Ramona to bring up her ex porno life, and Bethenny is like, you do realize I can hear you, right?

Bethenny says she thought Luann wrote a book on etiquette. Luann asks if what she said was wrong, and Bethenny says not if she’d said it to her, but it’s wrong to speak about her like she’s not there. She tells Ramona that she looks a bit wild, and Ramona says she doesn’t like Bethenny’s attitude. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s starting to sweat, and Ramona has the delivery of a lead balloon. Ramona tells Carole that because she doesn’t have children, she doesn’t understand. In her interview, Carole compares Ramona to Donald Trump and I want to cry. I’m hoping I don’t have to stop watching this. Ramona says Bethenny is rude, and Luann seconds it, but Bethenny says she doesn’t care what they think about her. Luann declares that Bethenny has shown her true colors, and doesn’t care about anyone except herself. In her interview, Luann gripes about Bethenny not asking about the wedding plans. Ramona calls Bethenny a witch, and decides to talk to Luann, deliberately turning away from Bethenny. Bethenny says she’s been called a witch and wicked, and she’s leaving. In her interview, Luann talks about Bethenny insulting her in the Berkshires, and how she didn’t leave. That was pretty bad. She thinks Bethenny should put on her big girl pants and stay. Carole gets up to go next. She thinks suckerfish Hoppy is enough; Bethenny doesn’t need this from Ramona.

Tinsley and Sonja arrive at Sonja’s house in the Hamptons. Sonja can’t wait for Ramona’s dinner party (why?), even though she wasn’t invited to stay at Ramona’s house. Sonja shows Tinsley to her room, and acts like an idiot bouncing on the bed.

Ramona, Luann, and Dorinda go to a winery for lunch. They discuss the previous evening. Ramona acts like she didn’t say anything outlandish, and just presented a hypothetical situation of concern to Bethenny. Luann says that Bethenny can dish it out, but not take it. In her interview, Dorinda says she didn’t even get to take a breath before Ramona started talking about it.

Bethenny says Ramona likes to find dirt about someone and bring it up. Truth! This reminded me of when she walked off the first (I think) reunion because Alex McCord had done some nude art photos. Bethenny is glad she doesn’t have to go to Ramona’s. She did get Ramona a gift, and Carole suggests she put her own name on the card and bring it. She’s kidding, just in case you questioned that. Bethenny is going to pick Carole up from Ramona’s later.

Dorinda tells Luann and Ramona about Sonja’s smack talk on Facebook. Filing that under who cares? Dorinda brings it up on her phone, and says she’s done. She doesn’t want to ruin Ramona’s party, but she might not be able to help herself. What happened to her telling Luann that she was going to act like a lady? Dorinda says Sonja is going to get it tonight.

Sonja tells Tinsley that Dorinda doesn’t have manners, but she wants to get back to being social friends and move forward. Tinsley is concerned that Sonja will be upset if she likes Dorinda, but Sonja says that won’t happen. Tinsley is nervous, and Sonja says it’s her fault.

Ramona sets things up for her dinner party. People we don’t know arrive, along with Dorinda. Dorinda shows Ramona more comments about her that Sonja posted. She says she’s going to make an effort to be cordial. Like that has ever happened.

Commercial break that annoys me. The first one is Maya Rudolph advertising Seventh Generation cleaning products, when she also advertises Clorox. Aren’t those opposite ends of the cleaning spectrum? Then I see Jeffrey Tambor promoting Tide, and wonder how much more money he needs? I can’t stand it when wealthy, well-known actors take jobs away from starving artists.

Carole arrives at Ramona’s place. Dorinda tells her about Sonja’s online comments, and how she said she’d never go to Luann’s tacky wedding. Dorinda says she has a mole, as in an investigative person, and has a file on Sonja a mile wide. Dorinda isn’t on the martini train tonight because she’s stalking prey.

Sonja says in her interview, that her MO is to never confront. She doesn’t deal with the elephant in the room, and is all about decorum. She and Tinsley walk into Ramona’s house.

Next time, the dinner commences, Carole tells Bethenny that it’s a nuthouse while Bethenny watches from outside, Dorinda informs Sonja that you need an invitation to go to a wedding, and Ramona is disinvited to Carole’s election party.

A Quote that Can’t Wait for Friday

Do one thing every day that scares you.Eleanor Roosevelt

🙌 Imposters has been renewed! It will be back in 2018. Hopefully, I’ll make it until then.

😹 Michael Rapaport is always hysterically funny on Watch What Happens Live, and tonight was no exception. He makes me literally lol.

April 19, 2017 – A Painting Conundrum, Tyler Tuesday & Beverly Hills Reunions On

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

We revisit Tracy’s unveiling of the clown picture. Tracy realizes that Larry wasn’t around during the fire drill. That’s because he was busy stealing the painting. He kisses it, and says that when Tracy tries to screw him out of a deal, she just ends up screwing herself. I’m not feeling the new Larry, and wish they’d bring back the previous actor.

Jake sees Franco at the hospital, and asks if he’s back to work. Franco says not yet, and finds out that Jake is there to see Andre. Franco shows him a picture of the latest drawing on the timeline, and asks if he knows how it got into his studio.

At the docks, Jason tells Sam that Julian is desperate to get out of town. Sam wonders what Julian would do to Alexis if she ran into him. Well…

Alexis and Julian are getting busy.

Tracy says every time Larry darkens her doorstep, she has to pay, and he’s not getting away with it. The others agree, and split up to look for Larry.

Jake insists he didn’t draw on the timeline, and it must have been one of his brothers. Franco wonders which one could have gotten into his studio. He asks who Jake thinks the boy in the picture is, and he says he doesn’t know. Franco asks if there’s anything he wants to talk about. Jake tells him not to tell anyone, especially his parents. Elizabeth comes up the stairs, telling Jake not to run off like that.

Jason finds Hooper on the docks. He says that he and Sam have some questions.

Alexis tells Julian that when she turned around on the bridge, he was gone. He says Olivia-J shot him, but even though it bled a lot, it wasn’t serious. He was the phantom stalking her, and apologizes for scaring her. She says she read the letter. He wishes he hadn’t taken so long to tell her the truth. He tells her that he’s sorry. She says she thought he was gone. He says he’s here now, and he’s never going to leave her.

On the grounds of the Quartermaine estate, Larry talks to someone on the phone about storing the painting. He literally runs into a strange girl, and drops it. It’s the girl from the monastery, and he asks who she is. Ned, Laura, and Dillon run up. Larry blames the girl for stealing the painting, but they don’t buy it. Ned grabs Larry, and the painting, and gives him the bum’s rush back to the house.

Laura thanks the girl for stopping Larry. She introduces herself as Samira Adine, and Laura asks what brought her there. She’s there to see Tracy.

Tracy tells Larry he’s despicable. Larry says that he at least deserves a finder’s fee, and Tracy says he’s lucky she’s not calling the police. Tracy says where were we, and Monica says hogging the happy couple’s spotlight. Tracy unveils the real painting. She says it was painted by a renaissance painter, and Monica apologizes, saying it’s beautiful. Ned says the resemblance is striking. He tells Tracy that her father loved her.

Elizabeth tells Jake that he’s not in trouble, but Andre is waiting for him, and he leaves. She tells Franco she doesn’t know if she’s doing the right thing. Whenever she tries to get Jake to open up about the island, he pulls away. She’d feel less useless as a mother if she knew what she was doing was right. Franco shows her the picture of the timeline and what Jake added.

Hooper tells Sam and Jason that if he sells out clients, he’s out of business. Jason says if Sonny gets mad, he’ll be out of business. Sam tells him that they’re good friends with Sonny, and asks why he was meeting Julian.

Alexis thought Hooper was helping Julian, and Julian says that was the plan. He wondered what she’d do if she found out he was alive, and now he knows. He thought they might still have a future. She tells him that he can’t stay in Port Charles. He suggests running away together. They’ll get word back eventually, and the kids will understand. They can start over. No right side or wrong side; just the two of them together. Alexis says he misunderstood what happened tonight. It’s not a fresh start. It’s good-by.

Hooper tells Jason and Sam that Julian never showed up. Sam asks if there was a woman with Julian when Hooper met with him, but Hooper says no. He tells them that if Julian makes contact, he’ll call. He leaves, and Jason tells Sam that if Alexis went with him, it was probably willingly.

Alexis says she understands why Julian has to disappear, but she’s not going. He says they love each other, and she says he held a knife to her throat. I hate when that happens. It’s such a buzzkill.  Julian says it’s the biggest regret of his life, and she knows why he did it. Alexis says that she knows how she felt, and can’t get past it. She says it’s not just about Olivia-J forcing him to do her bidding; it’s what he did before that. She asks if it was his intention to hurt Duke and Carrrlos. Julian says he loves her, and she tells him it doesn’t mean anything; there are two sides to him. He tells her that they both would stand by her, which is a pretty clever comeback. She says it’s only a matter of time before someone else gets hurt, and she’s not doing it. He says it wasn’t all bad, and she says it wasn’t, but it was built on the hope that the better side of him would win. He asks about tonight. She says she just wanted to remember. He promises it can always be like that, but she says he can’t promise that. She needs closure, and needs him to give it to her.

Tracy tells Ned to get Larry out. Tracy asks Monica if she can replace the wall-hanging now, but Monica thinks the painting should go in the front hall. Laura and Samira come in, and Ned says Samira is the one who caught Larry. Samira says she’s traveled a long way from Turkey to see Tracy. Tracy wonders how Samira tracked her down, and Samira says the monks gave her the information. The painting has to be returned. Tracy says she explained everything to the monks, and she’s willing to make another donation, but she’s not parting with the painting. Samira says her daughter’s life depends on it.

Franco tells Elizabeth what Jake said about the timeline. She says it’s obviously something he witnessed. Franco isn’t sure if it’s literal. Elizabeth thanks him, and says she’ll talk to Andre. Jake sees them hugging. Franco has the phone in his hand, and Jake asks if he showed Elizabeth his picture. Franco says she needs to know, and Jake runs away.

Sam tells Jason that she doesn’t think finding the scarf is an accident, and isn’t going to allow history to keep repeating. The only way to keep Julian away is to find him and send him to prison. Sam remembers an app she has that tracks down friends, and finds Alexis’s location. She says they have to call the police.

Julian tells Alexis that the only life worth living is one with her in it. She says she wishes she could say the same thing. Her feelings re powerful, and he caused so much heartache. She doesn’t want any more pain, and it’s the only place this will lead. He says he loves her, and he’ll honor her wishes. He’s leaving town, and he’ll never see her again. He asks her to just give him tonight, and they start getting busy again.

Larry tells Ned that all’s right with the world. Ned says hardly. Larry swiped the painting like it was a piece of jewelry he could pawn. Larry suggests they not discuss it in mixed company, since Olivia-F is with Ned. Ned says Olivia is his family, which is more than he can say for Larry. Larry wants to let bygones be bygones. He says Tracy will forget about it; she’s used to his schemes, and it’s no reason to kick him out. Ned says he’s no longer welcome, and he’s disinvited to the wedding. Larry says he’s not going anywhere, and sooner or later Ned will miss him. Ned doubts it.

Tracy asks Samira for ID. She says it looks correct, but could have been forged. Laura looks at the emergency visa. She notes that it’s for Virginia. Samira explains that some refugees helped her. She tells them about men kidnapping her daughter. Dillon thinks it sounds like human trafficking. Laura realizes that Samira was the one who was crying at the monastery. Samira says that she went to the monks for help, and they wanted to use the painting to bargain.

Dillon wants Tracy to give her the painting. Tracy wants to think about it because she’s hesitant to believe the story. Monica says if the monks believe the story, maybe they can just give them the money. Tracy says they could all end up in jail. Samira says if she took the painting, no money would change hands.

Ned tells Olivia-F that he wonders how he sprang from the same gene pool as Larry. She says good parenting has nothing to do with DNA, and he proves that with Leo. Ned says with Julian gone, he wants to be there for Leo. He asks if the offer is still on the table to adopt Leo. It is.

Alexis has to leave. Julian tells her to take care of Sam and Lucas, and to take care of herself. A lot of people love her, and if she wants a drink, call them. She tells him to be careful. They’re about to kiss, and the police bust in, along with Jason and Sam.

Tracy says that customs knows she has the painting. If it ends up as currency, she’ll get in trouble. She suggests Laura get ahold of Robert, and find out the details. Monica says they’ll get some food and make up a room for Samira. Laura says she’ll call Robert, but she thinks Samira is telling the truth, and Tracy might be the only one who can help.

Elizabeth and Franco can’t find Jake. Elizabeth says this is how it started. Franco tells her to check Andre’s office. He sees sneakers next to a cart, and finds Jake hiding. Jake tells him to go away. Franco says he gets it; he wouldn’t want to talk to him either, but his mom is worried. Jake doesn’t want them knowing anything else about the scarecrow.

Julian says Alexis is his hostage. BTW, this place is called the Rendezvous Motel. Very classy. Julian is arrested. He and Alexis stare at each other.

Samira asks Tracy to believe her. Tracy says painting means a lot to her. Samira shows her a journal and a ring. Tracy says her father had a ring like this. She opens the journal, and sees Edward’s handwriting. She finds a picture of Lila. She asks where Samira got this. Samira says she got them from her mother. Tracy’s father left them to her, as they’d been friends. She says she’s telling the truth. Monica takes her upstairs.

Tracy talks to the painting like it’s Edward. She says, she has blue eyes, and not to do this to her.

Tomorrow, Hayden can’t make any promises, Tracy isn’t giving up her father’s legacy, and Michael tells Sonny to leave Port Charles.

If Loving You is Wrong

Kelly finds out that Justice is in the car with Travis. She tells her assistant to call the police. Doesn’t that kid have a GPS on his phone? Kelly wants to talk to Travis, who tells her it’s illegal to talk on the phone and drive. She asks where he’s taking Justice, but he pretends like he can’t hear her. He tells her he’s hanging up, and that Justice loves her.

Kelly gets on the phone with Officer Rick. She tells him that Travis has her son. Rick takes down whatever information she has, which isn’t much. He gives another officer the phone number, and has him run a trace on Justice’s phone. Kelly keeps repeating, “Why is he doing this?”

Rick puts an APB out on Travis’s car. Esperanza asks what’s going on. Kelly calls her and tells her about Travis taking Justice. Esperanza says she’ll call her back. I don’t blame Esperanza for being frustrated all the time when she has to find out what emergencies are going on from neighbors. Kelly tries to get Justice back on the phone, but gets voicemail. Justice asks Travis where they are. Kelly tries calling him, but call, rinse, repeat.

Brad pretends to work. Eddie strolls in. He asks if Alex told him what happened before he got there. Brad says no, and Eddie says he has to hear it. He tells Brad about finding Alex with Andrew, and how she took off in the squad car. He claims he did everything he could to stop her. He wonders why Brad saved the baby, and Brad says it’s an innocent baby. Eddie says it’s a disgrace to him. He can’t figure out what’s going on, and Brad says that’s because he doesn’t have a heart. Eddie says Brad is his best friend and he can help him. They have Alex where they want her. If he spills the beans, she’ll go to jail. Brad can make her do anything he wants. Brad says he’s had enough. Eddie tells him it’s no time to get soft, but Brad says he’s done with it. He tells Eddie that Alex has suffered enough, and he’s done. Eddie says what about Brad’s suffering, and Brad tells him to leave. Eddie says he’ll go, but the soldier he knew wouldn’t let himself become a mockery. When his best friend comes back, call, but until then, he’s out.

Marcie brings flowers to Louise. She asks what the doctor said, and Louise says she’s under observation. Marcie wants Louise out of there, and Louise wants out too. They hug, and Louise thinks Marcie has a temperature. Marcie says she’s fine. They talk about Randal. Marcie says she stayed as far away as possible, but Louise says her heart didn’t. Marci calls Randal a bully, and says she wants nothing to do with him. She can love and worry about him, but not like him.

She starts to tell Louise something, and Randal comes in. He tells Louise how angry he is with Alex. Louise tells him to say hello to Marcie. Marcie wants to go; she says she can’t breathe. He asks if she’s sucking all the air out of Brad, and she says every chance she gets. She tells Louise she’ll be back. Randal calls her a slut, and she says she’s using the tricks he taught her. She leaves, and Louise tries to chastise Randal, but he doesn’t want to hear it.

Randal tells Louise that Alex said the child wasn’t his. Louise asks if he’s sure it is. Randal says Alex told the judge that she had multiple partners. Louise says, chalk one up for the white girl. Ha-ha! She says if a woman will cheat on her husband, why wouldn’t she cheat on her boyfriend? Randal insists it was only him, and that’s his son. Louise tells him that Alex let her see the baby, and tells Randal about talking to Alex. She says he could be Randal’s son, and Randal says no way he’s not. Louise thinks it’s foolish and naïve for Randal to think he’s the only one. He says the only other Black man that Alex knows is the mailman. Louise says it wouldn’t be the first time a housewife hooked up with a mailman, and Randal says he’s like, 200 years old.

Randal asks what Marcie wanted, and Louise says he ran her out before she could say. He asks if he can get Louise anything. She says peace, quiet, and time alone. She tells Randal he wears her out, and to go home. She tells him to check on the mailman. Ha-ha! I love Louise.

Diane shows up at Kelly’s office while she’s on the phone. Kelly says now is not the time. Diane wonders how she’s working around money, considering her past, and asks if they know her background. Kelly says she can’t afford to lose her job, and Diane suggests they talk then. Kelly asks Diane what she wants. Diane wants a key, since her son is getting out soon. Kelly says she needs time to talk to her son and explain things. Diane offers to talk to him, and Kelly wigs out a little bit. Diane asks if Kelly knows what it’s like to not know where her son is and what he’s doing. Kelly says more than Diane knows. Diane asks if Kelly understands about a mother wanting to protect her son. She wants the key. Kelly gives it to her.

Joey wants out of the hospital. Natalie is surprised he hasn’t been kicked out, but doesn’t think he’s ready to go. She says he’s barely walking, and will need rehab. He says he can walk and she asks him to show her. He can’t, and she says he’s not some superhero. He says he will be getting out. Natalie tells him that he has physical therapy today.

There’s a knock at the door. It’s Mr. Kim. Joey asks about Faun, and he says she’s home and healing. Natalie says she knows he’s upset that they were together, but he says he’s not. He thanks Joey for saving her life. He says if Joey hadn’t had a gun, he doesn’t know what would have happened. He owes Joey. Joey says another guy is dead because of him. Mr., Kim offers Joey his job back, and leaves them to their family time.

Joey says that was crazy. Natalie says she’ll be back. She sees Mr. Kim in the hallway. She asks if he paid Joey’s hospital bills. He didn’t, and she’s wondering why they’re letting Joey stay there when they have no insurance. Mr. Kim is surprised they don’t have any, because he’s under the mistaken impression that it’s actually affordable. Natalie goes back into Joey’s room, and Joey asks what she said to Mr. Kim. She’s saved by the phone ringing. Lushion says he needs her help. He tells her to come to the house. She says she’s on her way. She tells Joey to try to walk.

Alex burns dinner. She tells the kids she’ll take them out. They ask how they’re getting there, and she says she’ll call a cab. Peter asks where the car is, and she says she had an accident. Paisley asks about the baby, and she tells them to stop asking questions. She apologizes for being snippy. Paisley asks if she’s okay. She tells them to get ready, and tells Peter to ask Kelly if she can borrow her car. The kids go upstairs, and Alex cries.

Lushion stops by and asks if he can borrow candles. Alex invites him in, and creepy Randal watches from his porch. Lushion asks if everything is okay, and Alex says she burned dinner. She looks for the candles and gives him some really nice ombre ones. He says he wants to surprise Natalie, and tells Alex not to let her know. He says it feels good to borrow from neighbors. He says he knows what Alex is going through, and mentions Randal pressing charges. Alex asks if she can go to jail for what her parents did. Lushion says she had nothing to do with it…right? He asks if she saw Andrew, and she says he picked her up after she wrecked her car. Lushion asks if Andrew took her to her parents, but the kids come down and interrupt the conversation. Lushion says they can borrow his car, but Alex says they’ll just walk to the deli. Paisley says she doesn’t like deli food – like no kid ever said – and Alex says they’ll get some fresh air. Lushion thanks her and leaves. She follows with the kids. Creepy Randal is still in the same position he was when Lushion arrived, and quietly calls Alex a bitch.

Both Pete and Joey are in physical therapy. Pete is walking a little, and Joey says he needs a break. Pete introduces himself to Joey. They discover they were both shot. Pete says he was an innocent bystander, and Joey says he’s a cop in Maxine. Pete plays along, asking Joey how long he’s been a cop, and Joey says years. Pete ask if he was shot in the line of duty. Joey makes up a story, saying his back-up was late. Pete asks who it was and Joey says a guy named Lushion. He says Lushion is way too old to be a cop, and was probably out getting doughnuts. Pete asks what he called in when he got shot. Joey says 187 and even I know that’s incorrect. Pete points that out.

Some cops bust in to arrest Joey for violating probation. They drag him out of his chair, saying he can go to the prison hospital. Joey is yelling, and the doctor tries to intervene, but they cart Joey away.

Next time, Randal confronts Alex, Kelley’s ex says that he loves her, and Alex comes on to Randal, totally creeping me out.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Reunion Part Two

We just jump right in. Erika says she didn’t like the way PK asked if she’s for sale. He’s defensive of Dorit, but Erika says her beef is with him. Andy says she’d claimed to be over it, and LisaV suggests having a sense of humor. A viewer asks if LisaV has forgiven Erika for her accusing her of sniping from the sidelines, and we see a clip of Erika talking to someone who’s no longer on the show, it was so long ago. Lisa says she thought Erika was relaxed with her nudity, and we flash back to some flashes. Kyle says it wasn’t funny because Erika wasn’t in on the joke. A viewer suggests Kyle could have intervened, and Kyle says she told Dorit she didn’t think it would go well. She and LisaV get in a small argument. They both talk at once, so who knows what it’s about? Kyle tells Lisa not to turn things around, and that she wasn’t there.

LisaR asks why Dorit doesn’t just apologize. Because LisaR only listens to herself. Dorit has apologized over and over. Andy says he was surprised that Erika didn’t tell Tom right away, and asks how she approached him about it. She says she explained how the story was going to pan out, and he gets it, which doesn’t surprise me in the least. Erika implies that Dorit drug her through the mud. Andy asks PK how he felt about LisaR asking if Dorit trusted him, but he just rolled with it. Lisa says she’s sorry for that. PK apologizes for the joke he made, but says he doesn’t owe an apology to Tom.

Dorit says she doesn’t know how many times she can say sorry. Erika says she wasn’t the one who wouldn’t let it go. Dorit says everyone was still joking about it. She points out that Andy just did when they sat down. PK says he’s heard all their insults, and all he did was make a bad joke. Please, PK, don’t say it’s not like you killed her child.

Since he can’t leave it alone, Andy brings up PK saying that Erika should concentrate on the deep-rooted problems in her marriage. Erika says he doesn’t even know her, but LisaR keeps interjecting, and PK says he seems to be discussing Erika with Lisa. Lisa says that he claimed she was unhinged and maybe had a drug problem. He says his first experience with her was at a dinner he thought went fabulous, and he can’t believe she could leave such a great evening, then say there were bad intentions. Lisa deflects, saying that Dorit didn’t remember the conversation they had about Eileen’s father passing away. Huh? Andy interjects, asking why Lisa said that the people at dinner left to “blow some rails.” I guess he thinks he sounds hip. Lisa says she’d gotten to a point that she’d had it with the Xanax thing. Dorit says she never said Lisa had a problem, but Lisa went after her with a preposterous accusation. PK says he’s never done coke, and the suggestion was ridiculous. LisaV says it’s a damaging thing to say, and thinks it was just retaliation. LisaR insists that’s what she observed. PK says you don’t have to be honest, if it’s not factual, which is another way of saying what I always do, that these women tend to hide their animosity behind the guise of honesty. Andy says fake news is all the rage. Because he’s so Andy.

LisaR talks about the inappropriate stuff said by PK after the confrontation at LisaV’s party, and that he should have let it go. PK admits that they were being naughty. Dorit came back distraught, and he felt that the mean girls had bullied his wife. His emotions were running high, and he’d had a few drinks. I’m with him here. Both he and Ken were inappropriate, but they were just letting off steam privately. LisaR says if she’d said something, it would be different, and PK says that she’s said a million things that she’s apologized for. There’s no question that he was upset. He says that he did walk away from the confrontation, because none of the other husbands were there, and Dorit says Erika is the one who invited him into the conversation.

PK tells Erika she’s not nice, and she tells him to get the f out of here. She says it’s easy to apologize in hindsight, and it’s fine. Andy asks if it really is, and she says they have to start over and they’ll see.

We see a montage of the Beverly Hills double air kiss greeting, which is also a chance to look over some past fashion. Kyle says she was sometimes embarrassed by the hellos. We see the various careers and projects the women have going on. Erika hits the nail on the head saying, busy girls. They talk about Erika performing at Christina Aguilera’s birthday party. Everyone promotes their whatever. We find out Kyle’s show was picked up, but she won’t be on it personally. Erika is also coming back to The Young and the Restless. Erika was partly named after Erika Kane from All My Children, and we see part of a talk show interview where she met Susan Lucci. Dorit talks about the many businesses that she and PK are involved with. She’s encouraged by the other women to continue with designing clothing, and having her own thing going apart from PK.

Kim and Eden join the group. We see a picture of Kim’s grandson, who’s wearing one of those terrycloth hoodies with animal ears and looks adorable. We also see a picture of Kim on a date with Donald Trump. Andy suggests Kim could have been the First Lady, but she doesn’t want to talk about it. We flash back to scenes with Eden. We see many awkward hugs. Even Eden has to laugh. She’s wearing some fabulous fringe earrings that I probably can’t afford, and explains about the long hugs breaking the introduction energy, and that sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.

LisaV talks about having known Vidal Sassoon, but says she’d never met Eden. I remember liking his jean brand. Eden has been busy on Twitter shading Kyle. Eden says in watching the show, she saw how mean Kyle was. Kyle asks her to put herself in her shoes. She thought they were cool, then Eden said she was cold and distant in her interview. She adds that Eden ambushed her with questions about alcoholism right off the bat.

Andy brings up Eden and LisaR becoming fast friends, and how that changed, and we see clips. Including the one where Lisa said that Kim was close to death. It’s all worth watching to see LisaV’s sparkly earrings when she told Kyle what Eden had said. Ooh, Eden’s ballerina outfit at LisaV’s party is pretty good too. Andy reads viewer questions. Eden explains that she was overwhelmed in meeting Kim, and couldn’t not stick her nose where it didn’t belong. She doesn’t say it quite like that, but that’s my translation. Andy asks what Eden thought was wrong, and Eden says she felt nervous energy. Kim suggests when she feels that, to respect people’s spaces. She says they could have been friends, but instead of going to the source, Eden just repeated what LisaR had said and badgered Kyle. Kim says that Eden shouldn’t have been taking her inventory, and Eden tells Kim not to tell her how to work a program. Well, if part of the program is not taking anyone else’s inventory, then Kim has a right to point that out.

Andy asks the million-dollar question – why the blip did LisaR say what she did about Kim not being sober and close to death? Kim suggests that she doesn’t remember. Lisa says it was after game night. We flash back to their tiff. Kim says that Lisa lies, cries, and denies, and that it was unbelievable to watch. She says that Lisa has a huge heart, and she does like being around her. Lisa says they’ve made amends since then, and have moved on. Kim has big hopes. Andy asks about the bunny that Lisa gifted Kim’s grandson with. Here’s where it gets confusing.

Kim has brought said bunny, still in the wrapper. She didn’t give it to her grandson, because she didn’t feel that it had good energy. She gives it back to LisaR, and tells her when she’s in a better place, maybe she can give it back to her. This is the stupidest, meanest thing ever. Kim says she’s all about energy and being positive. Eden asks if she wants a crystal for healing, and Kim says she is healed. Kim says that Lisa might be better off giving it to someone else. Lisa starts crying, and Eileen wonders why Kim chose to do this at the reunion. Kim says she doesn’t know what’s real and what’s not with LisaR. Andy asks Lisa what she’s thinking. She says she doesn’t need to say anything; she gets it loud and clear. Andy is confused, since he thought they were in a good place, but Kim says she doesn’t know if she’s ready to be Lisa’s friend. Lisa says it’s okay. She’s forgiven herself, and she’s okay with that. Kyle interjects that Kim is like that, but she sees why Lisa feels badly. Lisa says Harry thought it was a good idea to give Kim the gift, even though she had second thoughts. Kim says maybe it’s good that she feels badly, since she hurt Kim.

LisaR says she has to leave the stage for a moment. Eileen follows. Eileen says that it was a calculated move, trying to demean and hurt Lisa, when Lisa was just being nice. Lisa says she’s good because she has a good life. They regroup.

Dorit says it’s not like LisaR is just the victim. Kyle tells Kim to go back and explain to LisaR how superstitious she is. Yeah. More like yearning for attention. LisaR is an idiot, but this is nasty.

Eileen says it just shows where she’s at, and LisaR says Kim showed her true colors.

Kim goes backstage with the bunny. It’s like some bizarro world version of Fatal Attraction.

Next time – the Reunion, part three – Dorit tells LisaR she has a big mouth, the bag of pills is revealed, and Kim accuses Eileen of making faces (like no one else does that). If anyone deserve a four-part reunion, it’s these girls, but I think that three is it with this one.