What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

Shahs of Sunset

Asa tells her parents that Israel was physically challenging. They sit down to a fabulous meal, and she says she missed her mother’s cooking. She whines that she felt alone, and like her friends weren’t looking out for her. In her interview, she says she felt like everyone turned their backs on her, but that’s not what we see from the clips. She admits that her brain is like an omelet.

Mike and Shervin are having a guy’s night out with some friends, and go to a club. Reza joins them. Mike says he had an epiphany in Israel, and thinks it’s time to go out and start meeting people. In his interview, Shervin says that Mike has a lot of guilt and shame about cheating on Jessica, and he should let it go. Reza watches how Shervin puts the moves on some women. Destiney shows up with a couple of friends. In his interview, Mike says that he and Destiney are like bros, even though she’s female.  Mike is flirting like crazy. Destiney says she loves him, but can’t believe some of the sh*t he says. She thinks he’s trying to deflect from his own hurt, and he’s saying the wrong things purposely. Mike says there’s nothing in the club he wants. He tells us about the qualities he would like in a woman, and we flash back to Jessica being all of those things.

Reza goes shopping for cabinet knobs with MJ. He thinks the knobs should lead them in the direction they want to go in, and that MJ is finally starting to move forward. He doesn’t want the condo renovation to scare her, so he’s starting with something small, but she’s already overwhelmed looking at all the knobs. She wonders why you can’t take a sample home to check it out. There are like, ten thousand knobs in this place. She finds a towel hook she likes, and Reza thinks of it as a huge victory. He has to leave, and tells the clerk not to let her back out of it.

Reza goes to a hookah restaurant where he’s meeting Mike, Shervin, and Tommy. They don’t serve alcohol, and I’m surprised he doesn’t leave immediately. MJ calls, and says he has to keep what she’s going to say between them. She tells him that Shervin has been sleeping with Tara, who’s married, and apparently she’s been booted out of the house. Reza says he’s meeting Shervin in a minute, and can’t believe she dropped this on him right now. Mike arrives, and she tells Reza not to say anything. Mike brings a bottle of liquor, and hides it under the chair. When Mike asks what’s up with MJ, Reza says he’s sworn to secrecy. Like that’s ever stopped anyone on this show.

Shervin comes in next, and Reza is saved by the waitress. Tommy follows. Mike says he had his reservations about Tommy at first, but when he saw how he took care of Shams like his own father, he loves him. Tommy asks about Annalise, and Shervin talks about how much he loves her and thinks there’s a potential future. She’s moving out to LA soon. In his interview, Reza says Shervin is a bad liar. Mike says it’s good to live together first, so you find out their neurotic habits, and mentions the proverbial toothpaste tube. I have never once had an issue with how someone deals with the toothpaste tube. I do, however, prefer toilet paper rolling down over the top.

GG goes shopping for Asa’s baby. She says being around all the baby stuff is giving her baby fever. She’s always wanted children, and would like a football team of babies. She hopes she can raise one to be better than she is. Shervin arrives at the store. He asks if she can find a gift for him to bring, but she says he’s on his own.

GG’s birthday is coming up, and she’s having an 80s themed party. Her doctor calls, and tells her after two cycles without her RA meds, she can try for getting pregnant. Shervin is worried, since he thinks they’re rushing things. She tells Shervin that MJ is suggesting he’s taking on some of Mike’s characteristics, and that he’s been hooking up with Tara. He swears there’s no truth to it. In her interview, she decides to believe him, but says if he’s lying, her foot will be so far up his ass, he’s going to be taller.

Reza and Adam go to a cat café, where the cats are all up for adoption. Reza says he’s obsessed with cats. They get coffee an Adam finds a tuxedo cat with a mustache like Reza’s. Adam brings up having a baby, and Reza says he thought they were just enjoying some lattes. Adam wants to see them moving forward with fertility tests, but Reza is still interested in adoption. He finally agrees to take the test.

Mike and business partner Eddie check out the new shoe samples. We flash back to how Kitson went bankrupt the last time Mike had a shoe line, and he wants to concentrate on baby shoes now. He thinks he’ll make more money than he would have with Kitson. Eddie asks how much more he’s willing to put in financially. Mike says it’s a gamble. He thinks it’s an amazing product, and has to have the courage to take risks. He talks about his grandfather leaving Iran, and getting involved with the Japanese stock market. He says in the not too distant future he’ll be patriarch of the family, and Eddie says that it’s time to put his money where his mouth is.

Shervin meets MJ for lunch. He tells her about shopping with GG, and how she’d repeated what MJ said about him. He says he’s disappointed and upset that she didn’t come to him first. In her interview, she says he invited her to lunch for damage control, and she’s going to practice her eyeroll. Shervin claims that he’s only seen Tara a few times, and even then, just with their mutual friends. He thinks Tara has serious problems. In her interview, MJ says that Tara has been talking about leaving her husband and moving in with Shervin, but he just wanted to be swervin’ Shervin. MJ pretends that yeah, Tara is crazy, and that she believes him.

MJ meets Tommy at a hotel room. He has flowers and a drink for her. She says she’s new at this ovulation thing, but thinks she’s ovulating. I guess this is an ovulation hook up. She says they don’t check into a five-star hotel every day, but this is important. I won’t tell you what he says. She wants her dad to see her baby, and says it’s like Nike, just do it. She tells herself it will be fine.

GG helps set up for her birthday celebration at a roller rink. She says most people feel old at 35 (really? I didn’t), but she has great plastic surgeons. Everyone arrives in 80s garb, mostly Madonna/aerobics instructor outfits. Destiney wants to introduce someone to Mike. He plays twenty questions, but she doesn’t want to give it all away. She says he needs a fine chick who’s classy and respectful, but not her. GG tells Asa that the baby factory can open in two months. Asa says that she and Shalom need to hurry it up then. Maybe she should speak with Shalom first?

In her interview, MJ says Asa is fake, and the relationship is so painful, she wants it to be done. Asa thinks the level of toxicity from MJ has gotten so high, she doesn’t want to be around her. Everyone roller skates better than I do. Which isn’t too difficult. Tara arrives. GG says Shervin finally admitted to sleeping with her. At the end of the conversation, she agreed not to say anything to anyone. Shervin shows up in a crazy wig. Tara doesn’t want to talk to him.

Omg, fifteen minutes to Game of Thrones. I’m afraid to watch. I’m still worn out from last week.

Tara decides to leave, and sneaks out the back. GG wants them to talk, and tells her to stick with the truth. GG says it’s not a comfortable position to be in, and doesn’t want either one of them to get hurt. Tara tells Reza that she was stupid, and told a couple of friends. She says that she was protecting him, and everyone agrees that’s not happening anymore. Shervin approaches, and Reza asks why he’s not keeping it real. In her interview, MJ says that Shervin has a fetish for being secretive, and likes sneaking around. Shervin calls Tara sick and crazy. What a creep! Adam explains the drama to Destiney. Mike, and Asa. Destiney doesn’t believe it.

Tara tells Shervin not to screw with her life, and he calls her delusional. It’s like when Eddie denied sleeping with Rocky on Below Deck, except Rocky is also legitimately crazy. Mike is keeping quiet unless asked for his opinion. Wise choice. He says he’s not finger-pointing, but eventually the truth comes out. Shervin says he can have whoever he wants, and insults Tara, saying why would he want her. I don’t have enough bad things to say about this dude at this moment. He tells Tara to give her speech to the Academy. We see him in his interview, denying everything, like we did Mike before his divorce. Reza asks GG if Shervin admitted it to her. In her interview, GG tells us that he slept with Tara before Annalisa came back the last time, and hopes he washed the sheets, since he cut it close. She tells Reza that Shervin admitted it, and Reza relays this to Shervin. Tara says she liked him, but now she sees the real person. MJ thinks Tara thought he would drop Annalise, and she fell for this dog. GG tells Shervin that he’ll be respected for telling the truth, and tells him about Mike. She says she can’t force him, but he says if it will make her feel better, he’ll admit to something he didn’t do. Please. Don’t embarrass yourself any further.

Reza says that he cheated on a partner of seven years, and lost him. Shervin says if it makes everyone feel better, he did it. Reza doesn’t miss a beat, and says to learn from his experience. Shervin says the truth isn’t working. GG asks if he didn’t tell her it happened, and he changes what he told her. Because everyone always forgets that they are being filmed, and we know what they said. Now he claims that they only had drinks. He says that Tara isn’t even his type. They all call him a liar. In his interview, Reza says he speaks frankly because he was like Mike and Shervin, and now he’s a self-confessed, reformed ho. He says that being honest made Mike more lovable. Tara says Shervin should own up to it, and Shervin acts stupid.

Next time, a photo shoot with babies and shoes, GG fails a hearing test miserably, and Reza thinks that Asa got pregnant in vitro.

Game that Throne

I’m was afraid to watch Game of Thrones after last week, but no way was I going to miss thefinale. I notice that there are house banner icons next to the names in the credits. Were those always there? Are the Starks online?

Cersei has her own plans for the summit, basically to kill everyone if anything goes wrong. Traitor turncoat Bron escorts everyone in. It was like old home week for Podrick and Tyrion. There were lots of furtive glances between the various characters. Dany was late, and came swooping in on Drogon. I was hoping they’d just dracarys Cersei, and be done with it, but no. Euron interrupted, wanting Theon to submit to get his sister back. Tyrion was like, that’s not what we came here for, and Cersei told Euron to sit down and shut up.

Cersei didn’t believe them about the White Walkers, even though somebody just flew down on a dragon, so, they whipped out their pet zombie. I was hoping it would eat Euron’s face off, but that didn’t happen. The Hound cut it in half, and both halves crawled around, while he cut more pieces off. Cersei actually looked sick, which was somewhat satisfying. Jon explained they can be killed by fire or dragonglass, and this was the only war that mattered. We find out the zombies can’t swim, and Euron decided to take his boats and leave. He said this was the only thing that’s ever terrified him, and he’s seen a lot of scary stuff. Cersei had a freaking moment of clarity, and accepted the truce, but on the proviso that Jon stayed in the North, and didn’t bug her anymore when it’s over. Dany wondered why she didn’t ask her, but Cersei said she knew Jon would be truthful. Jon said he couldn’t serve two queens, so thanks, but no thanks. Cersei was like, screw you then, they’ll get to you first, and then we’ll deal with what’s left of you. Brienne tried to talk sense into Jaime. Dany told Jon that she didn’t want one of her dragons to have died for nothing, and Tyron asked if he’d ever considered learning to lie just a bit. Jon said that when people make false promises it gets easier to make more lies, and pretty soon, you can’t believe anything. Tyron volunteered to talk to Cersei, and I started thinking, wait a minute, they should be able to fight these guys without Cersei. For God’s sake, Dany sits on a mountain of dragonglass and has two fire breathing dragons. This made me mourn Viserion all over again.

Tyrion goaded Cersei to kill him, but she didn’t, so he helped himself to some wine. And more wine. I note that if Cersei doesn’t stop pursing her lips the way she does, she’s going to start looking old before her time. Apparently, she’s not too old yet, because she’s going to have a baby. Elsewhere, Jon told Dany what we’ve all been thinking, that maybe the witch who told Dany she couldn’t have children was wrong.

Cersei came back out and said that when the Great War was over, she hoped they’d remember that she chose to help without any assurances or promises from them.

Sansa got all pissed about no communication from John. Littlefinger was no help, stirring the pot, saying Jon and Dany would make an alliance. When Sansa showed concern about Arya, Littlefinger tried to steer her in the direction of fear, telling her to imagine the worst thing Arya could do and the worst reason for doing it. He led her into thinking that Arya was after her position, which seemed nonsensical. Another stupid award for Sansa?

I wondered why Theon was even there when they had a strategy meeting. Theon said he risked everything to tell an enemy the truth. Jon thought it was best to be honest if they were going to fight together. Theon said that Jon was even a goody-goody back when they were kids. Jon said his dad was in Theon too, and he forgave him for being the worst person ever. Theon decided to grow a pair, and try to save Yara, like she did him.

On the beach, Euron started to go out to the boats, and I actually said out loud, ugh, this guy. He told his men that they were going to find a nice island, kill the men, and take the women, but Theon had other plans. Euron ended up fighting with him, which was probably a bad idea, since he has a lot of pent up anger and resentment. He kept kicking Theon in the cajones, which did nothing except make me laugh and puzzle Euron. Then Theon proceeded to beat the ever-living snot out of him. I liked how none of the other men got involved, and when Theon was the winner, they were like, all right! we’re with you!

Littlefinger smirked when Sansa had Arya brought to the great hall, and I wanted to wipe it off his face. Sansa said something about honor, and how stands the accused of murder and treason? – Littlefinger. Oh man, as boring as she is, this was great. Not so stupid after all, Sansa brought us back to him pushing Lysa through the moon door, among other things he’s had his little finger in. He denied everything, but Bran brought up how he’d tried to have Bran killed. Sansa played the worst game with him, saying he’s best at turning families against one another. Sansa thanked him for his many lessons, and Arya slit his throat. Alrighty then.

Omg, Cersei’s coat was the best. So so 70s and so couture and so amazing. Cersei told Jaime she wanted to pull out of the deal, and just cozy up with him. She realized there was a missing dragon, concluding that dragons must have a vulnerability, and thought they should just stay put. Jaime was like, there will still be a war, and whoever wins is going to kill us. She didn’t believe that Euron was running, but that he was going to bring the bank to them, like any of that means anything at this point, and anyway, by now he was dead. Jaime said he’d pledged to ride north, and was doing it, but Cersei said it was treason. The Mountain stopped him from leaving, and she said no one walks away from her. Jaime told her that he’s the only one she has left, and was like, go ahead and kill me. We had a moment when she nodded, and the Mountain made like he was removing his sword from its sheath, but Jaime just walked out. I guess Cersei told the Mountain to just scare him. Or maybe it wasn’t a full nod.

Sam and Gilly got to Winterfell. Bran told Sam that’s he’s the Three-Eyed Raven now, and explained how it works. Bran said that Jon needs to know the truth about himself. He’s the son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark. Sam told Bran about what he’d read, and said that they were married in a secret ceremony. Bran saw the ceremony in this three-eyed head.

Jon knocked on Dany’s door, and I guess they’ll be replacing Cersei and Jaime as the power couple related to each other. Maybe they’ll have a baby dragon to replace Viserion. As they were getting busy, back at Winterfell, Bran said that Jon has never been a bastard. His name is Aegon Targaryen, and he’s heir to the Iron Throne.

Sansa and Arya said blah-blah-blah about surviving and missing their dad.

Bran went into a trance, and became a raven, or whatever he does, and went to the Wall. Beric and Tormund were looking out from the tower, and saw riders coming out of the woods. The army of the dead; loads of them, and that disturbing second-in-command on his horse. Someone from Castle Black blew a shofar, but it didn’t matter. Here came the spiky-headed Night King, riding zombie Viserion, who now blows ice instead of fire. He’s all spooky and tattered-looking now too. He sliced right through the wall, horizontally, as they flew next to it. It was crazy – everything falling and breaking apart, people running everywhere, and the Wall starting to come down like falling dominoes. The Night King on undead Viserion entered through the now-open Wall, along with his billion-man army, and one giant. My heart was pounding like crazy.

I am left with two thoughts – this is not good, and who’s going to clean up this mess?

I am sincerely hoping that the next book comes out to tide us over until the next season, which is God only knows when in 2018.

Three Throne Quotes

You’re still very strange and annoying. – Sansa, referring to Arya

The only one that needs protecting is the one who gets in her way. – Brienne referring to Arya

This isn’t about living in harmony; it’s just about living. – Jon