What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Valentin tells Nina that more than any other anniversary, he cherishes the night they met. Nina reminds him that he called it “manifestly,” and said her ex was a tool. She thanks him for helping her open her door, and he thanks her for letting him in. He gives her the sapphire necklace from the photo shoot as a gift.

Anna asks Finn if he’s ready. He says ready to hoodwink a hypochondriac? She tells him that it’s for a good cause, and he says it’s her cause. She says that Cassandra fences stolen items and uses the money for illegal dealings on the dark web. Finn says that could be anything, and perhaps Anna should hold off until she knows exactly what Cassandra is doing wrong. Anna tells him that this is the best chance they’re going to get, and he says it’s not about Cassandra; it’s about Valentin, and Anna is using him to find out how entrenched he is with Cassandra.

Dr. Kline tells Ava that he didn’t say anything about her going home. Ava asks if he changed his mind, and intends to finish her treatments. He says there will be no other treatments, and she asks what the point would be in her staying then? Kline says she’s saying that like she has a choice.

Jason answers his phone. Patient 6 is on the other end, and asks, who is this? Jason replies, who is this? and I laugh. They must have laughed too, when they read it the first time.

Nina tells Valentin that the necklace is gorgeous, and he says not as gorgeous as she is. She says it must have cost a fortune, unless… Valentin is like, I didn’t steal it, and she says just checking. He tells her that his history isn’t squeaky clean, but he wants to keep it clean now, and nothing he’s ever done will touch her or Charlotte. He puts the necklace on her. Nina feels badly that she didn’t get him anything. He says that she’s given him enough – her forgiveness, her outrageous sense of humor, and coming back to him. She says that she’s never leaving again.

Finn wants Anna to admit that this is just a means to an end, and it’s about Valentin. Anna says that motives should never be simplified, because people are complex. Valentin, for example, has a wife and daughter he loves, but he thinks he’s smarter than everyone else. If he thinks it benefits Nina and Charlotte, he’ll go back into business. She’s not just upholding the law; she feels responsible for who Valentin is, and can’t really turn a blind eye. She’ll either bring them both down, or settle for Cassandra. Finn asks how Anna is responsible, but she tells him that it’s none of his business. Finn says so, he should just do what he’s told. Anna says it’s a shot at redemption, but he calls it blackmail. Anna gives Finn a gift box, and tells him to endear himself to Cassandra. It’s a special organic tea that boosts the immune system. Finn wonders if it will cause another allergic reaction, but she says it’s just tea.

Ava asks Kline if this is a joke. He tells her that she aided and abetted Patient 6’s escape. She says she only picked up a paperclip, and she’s seen him in action. He would have escaped with or without help. Kline tells her that Patient 6 is very dangerous, and now this is his problem thanks to her. Ava promises not to touch any more office supplies, but Kline isn’t having it. She threatens to call the embassy, and he asks with what? Her phone has been confiscated, and the address on the forms was false. They’re a very private clinic, and no one knows she’s there. In time, she’ll adjust. Ava elbows him good, but a guard is waiting just outside the door. Kline says she’s going to regret that.

Several men come into the church. Patient 6 ducks down behind something. They see Griff and asks if he’s seen a guy wearing medical scrubs. Griff tells them that he did, but he ran out as soon as Griff walked in. The men leave, and Patient 6 comes back out. He thanks Griff.

Jason looks at the phone. Sam comes back, and he tells her that there was a call, but he doesn’t know who it was. The number was local, but it’s not in her contacts. She takes the phone, and says let’s find out.

Ava gets shoved back into her room. Kline tells her that she doesn’t seem to grasp the severity of the situation. Patient 6 shouldn’t have been able to form a sentence, much less plan an escape. Ava says that Valentin Cassadine knows where she is, and sooner or later, he’s going to wonder what happened. Kline says he’ll come up with something, and she tells him good luck with that. She and Valentin are close. Why else would he have provided a reference for her? She tells Kline he might want to rethink his decision. He says that Valentin is the least of his problems, and he has to think about survival – his, not hers.

Valentin and Nina agree that one-night stands have a bad rep. Nina tells him he was the first, but it was the best sex she ever had. Not because it was a no-strings encounter. She tells him that she came from a buttoned-up Manhattan family, and was in a coma for twenty years, so it put a wrench in things. She says even though their first night was incredible, unbridled passion, but what they have now is better. Valentin agrees, but says she’s wrong about their first encounter being a one-night stand. He’s had a few, but there was something special. He knew right away his life would never be the same. They kiss.

Cassandra appreciates Finn coming by. They sit on her terrace, and Finn calls it a little Eden. Cassandra says she spends a lot of time there. He says he got the impression she doesn’t get out much, and she says that her energy level doesn’t allow it. She asks if he looked at her files, and he says yes, all three volumes. Cassandra asks if he thinks it’s all in her head, but Finn says just the opposite. He thinks he knows what’s wrong. Maybe it’s the love of a challenge, or maybe it’s because he’s been where she is – it wasn’t exactly the same, but he was very ill once, and didn’t know if he’d ever be cured. He tells her about having Blackwood’s Syndrome, and how he found a cure, but not in time to save his wife. She says he’s impressive and wonders why he didn’t say something sooner. He tells her that he didn’t want to give her his resume, but understands the frustration of feeling sick and thinking it will never end. She asks how she gets better. I’m wondering if she has fibromyalgia.

Sam tells Jason that it was Griff on the phone. She wonders if he butt dialed her. Jason says that he heard Griff say, “Look, I need to…” but then he hung up. Maybe he got interrupted, or decided to try someone else. Sam is concerned that GH might be trying to reach them, and decides to call the hospital.

Griff asks if Patient 6 wants to try again, but he says they could be tapping the phones by now. Griff wonders who “they” are, and asks Patient 6 to answer one question. He came to find a patient in a clinic there. Patient 6 gives him directions to the Baronski Clinic. Griff says that he can tell Patient 6 is in trouble (really? how did he figure that one out?), and asks if there’s anything he can do. Patient 6 tells Griff that he can handle it. Griff insists he take some money. They tell each other good luck.

Ava asks Kline if he’s going to kill her, but he says he’s a doctor, not a murderer. She says he only drugs patients within an inch of their lives. He tells her that the guard will be outside, and leaves. She screams after him if they can talk about this.

Finn tells Cassandra that he went over her case ten times. He can see why her symptoms were dismissed. She says she’s been in agony, and it’s even more distressing that no one has figured out what’s wrong. He says that it’s neurologically systemic, and almost impossible to pinpoint. If he’s correct, she could have a few ailments, which are treatable. She asks if he’s going to treat her, but he says no.

After calling the hospital, Sam tells Jason that Griff wasn’t there, but they had her test results and she’s fine. He asks where the smile is then. Sam says she’s been doing some thinking, and thinks she messed up. She’s been blatantly telling him that they need to live in a danger-free zone, and their old life can’t exist anymore. Jason agrees, but she wonders if he feels that way deep down. She says it used to be what made him tick, living with danger was like breathing. If he’s just doing this to make her happy, he’ll die inside, and she can’t have that.

The priest brings some clothing and shoes to Patient 6. Patient 6 wonders why the priest is helping him. He tells Patient 6 that he’s in God’s house, shoeless and alone, and the Lord tells us to give aid to those people. He asks if there’s anything else he can do, Patient 6 says he can’t ask for anything else. The priest says he’s in the house of God; it never hurts to ask. Patient 6 says that he needs to go home.

Cassandra wonders if Finn is clueless or cruel; he just said she was treatable. He tells her that she is, but he can’t treat her here. He’s not licensed to practice. She would have to come to the US, particularly Port Charles. He could run some tests in his state-of-the-art lab. Cassandra says that her business is based in Morocco, and she hasn’t been anywhere in years. Finn says there’s no way he can legally treat her there. He gives her his card in case she changes her mind, saying he’d like a crack at solving her problem.

Valentin and Nina bask in the afterglow. Nina says no more custody battles, and she’s looking forward to returning to the normal routine – at least normal for them. He tells her that he’s glad she’s Charlotte’s stepmother. She’s no stranger to adversity, and knows what it’s like to be shy and anxious. Nina asks what he thinks will make Charlotte tick? Will she be artsy, athletic, a bookworm, or boy crazy. He’s just glad Nina will be a part of it, and says he hopes it lasts. She asks why it wouldn’t, now that Ava is out of the picture. He tells her Ava was just one obstacle.

Ava tries the other door, but it’s locked. Kline comes in with a hypodermic needle. She says maybe they can work something out, but he says there’s nothing to work out; she’s inconvenienced the wrong person. She tells him that she’ll pay him anything. He says it’s out of his hands; he’s following orders.

Jason tells Sam that he almost died twice in five years. Sam says she noticed. He says they can’t live like that anymore. When he was in a coma for four weeks, he was hearing her cry and hearing his children’s voices, but couldn’t do anything about it. He doesn’t want to revisit that. Sam tells him that he doesn’t have to do it for her. He tells her that he made a mistake. The world moves on without you, and he tried to pick up where he left off, but sometimes you have to move on and mature. That life doesn’t fit anymore. Sonny will always be his friend, Sonny doesn’t own his life. The days of taking unnecessary risks are over.

Patient 6 tells the priest he can’t get into the details, but there are people after him and he needs to get home. He has no passport. Can he help? The priest asks how much time he has, but Patient 6 says not much. The priest tells him to wait. Maybe he has a way.

Finn returns to Anna at the café. He tells her about the beautiful view from Cassandra’s terrace, and says he doesn’t think they’ll see each other again. He explained that she’d have to come to Port Charles for treatment, and she wasn’t interested. Anna asks what she said, and Finn says she told him, “I’m not interested.” She said she has a business here, and hasn’t left in years. He gave Cassandra his card, but tells Anna not to hold her breath. She says they’ll see. The tea was bugged, and she’ll be able to hear within a three-room radius. Finn says she would if he’d given it to her, but he left it in the taxi. Anna tells him that he’s a terrible spy.

Valentin tells Nina that this is just a temporary cease fire. Lulu will stop at nothing to get Charlotte all to herself. Nina says she won’t succeed. Lulu’s self-righteousness drives her nuts. She understands, and if it was Nathan, she’d feel the same way; but Nikolas had been making questionable decisions, and had already faked his own death. For Charlotte’s sake, Lulu should suck it up. She says that Valentin always puts Charlotte first. It’s one of the first things she noticed about him, and why she fell in love with him. They kiss.

Sam says when she and Jason first got together, she was a mess. He was the first person to give her the benefit of the doubt. He made her want to tell the truth, and made her feel safe; he was Sonny’s enforcer. She wants him to be whoever he is. If he’s that guy, fine; if not, fine, but don’t deny who he is to make her happy. He says that’s not what he’s doing. There was a time being on the edge fueled him. and made him feel alive, but that’s when it was all about him. He’s a husband and father now. A real man stops being selfish, and takes on responsibilities. He’s always going to protect her and their family. He wants to be her man. He holds her.

Patient 6 wanders around church. He looks at the cross, and thanks God for bringing him this far. He asks Him to please help him get home to his family, and keep them safe until he can see them again.

Finn tells Anna that he’s not a spy, and it was bad judgement on her part to bring him into the cloak and dagger game if she doesn’t like how he plays. She says they need to come at it from another angle. Finn says that Cassandra probably threw the card away at this point, and he’ll never see her again.

Nina has a meeting. She leaves, and Valentin’s phone rings. It’s Cassandra. She says he’s been living in Port Charles a while now. Tell her whatever he knows about Dr. Hamilton Finn. I always forget he even has a first name.

Ava tells Kline that she won’t be a problem. Griff pops up behind Kline, grabs him, and injects him. Wow. He’s like a superhero. He asks if Ava is okay, and she says she is now.

Jason tells Sam that he’s allowed to go home.

The priest returns with another man. He tells Patient 6 that maybe he has something better than a train. Where does he want to go?

Tomorrow, Finn asks Anna what plan B is, Cassandra says there are matters to discuss, and Laura holds a gun on Valentin.

If Loving You is Wrong

Justice tells Natalie that he killed Ramsay, and asks her to call the police. She asks how, and Justice says he stabbed him with a knife from his mama’s kitchen. He says Ramsay was in the shower. She says he’s a child and Ramsay was a grown man. He wants the police to know that his mother didn’t do it; he wants her to come home. Natalie asks when he did it, and he says he doesn’t remember. He tells her that the back door was unlocked.

Natalie is stunned. She calls Lushion. He asks if he can call back. She says it’s important; it’s about Justice. She tells him to hurry. Justice asks if she called the police. She tells him she did. He wants to know if they’re letting his mother go, and she says they have to talk to the police first. She parks him on the couch and puts the knives in the bedroom.

At the station, Lushion asks Steve about a law firm who helped in another case. Steve asks why he’s calling them, and he says Kelly. Steve asks if he thinks she’s innocent, and says they have a lot on her. Lushion says he does, and all the more reason to make the call now.

Ian’s phone rings. Lushion introduces himself. He needs a favor. He has a friend who’s accused of murder and knows she’s innocent; he knows her well. Ian asks where she is, and says she’s not to say a word. Lushion says he told her that already. Ian says he’ll be there in the morning, but Lushion tells him that she has a kid, and asks if he can come now. Ian agrees, and asks if there’s a judge. Lushion doesn’t know, but I finally get the DA’s name; it’s Jan. Ian says he knows her.

Esperanza approaches Lushion, and asks if he talked to Kelly. He says he has, and she’s all right. Esperanza tells him that Natalie said Justice isn’t doing too well. Lushion asks if she can find out about a 911 tape. He tells her about the tape with Ramsay saying Kelly’s name, and she says she’ll look into it. He tells her to keep it on the low. He says that Eddie is there; he’s been arrested. She says for what, and he says the FBI. She knew everything would catch up to him, but it’s sad because he’s her daughter’s father. She knows he’d done bad things, but doesn’t know about everything. Lushion asks how long she’s known him, and she says too long. He wonders where Eddie was after he left Cincinnati for a couple of years after going to the academy, but she doesn’t know anything. She says there’s a friend who might know – Eddie calls him “Chaos” – but she doesn’t know where he is. Lushion wonders if Eddie might tell Esperanza something, but she tells him don’t count on it.

Alex wakes up. Brad’s not there, but his phone is. Marcie is calling. Brad comes out of the bathroom, and Alex hands him the phone. Marcie tells him that she needs him; she has a flat. The tow truck said it would be two hours. He says he’ll be on his way shortly. He tells Alex that Marcie has a flat, and she asks if it’s a real one. He says yes, and he’ll be right back. Alex asks if he really cares about her. She says it’s not easy to hear, and watch him leave in the middle of the night to help Marcie. She wants to come with him, but he reminds her they have kids who are asleep. She says she would though, to show Marcie that he’s hers. Brad says he reminds her all the time, and Alex asks if he can remind her. He tells her they’re working on it, but she has to be patient; there’s been a lot of damage. Alex knows she’s the cause of it, and says she’s trying. Brad tells her he’s committed to working on this. He says it’s over between him and Marcie, and he loves her. Alex says she loves him too, but Marcie isn’t going to stop. He explains that the tow truck would take two hours and it will only take him a half hour. Alex says she’ll wait up.

Randal gets a motion detected signal. He pops outside, and tells Brad that was quick. Brad says Marcie didn’t think so, and Randal says that she’s a good faker. Because we’re fourteen, Brad says she must be, since she was with Randal for so long. Randal says that Alex must not be satisfied, so don’t be surprised if they’re in the shed when he gets back; she likes it a lot longer. Brad asks Randal if he’s seen the video of him and Marcie doing it in his bed. He just sent it to him. Enjoy.

Lushion greets Ian, who’s waiting for a judge friend to get Kelly bail. Lushion tells him where she is, and Ian asks if he’s sure. Lushion says he’d put his reputation on it. I know Ian from somewhere. Probably a Tyler Perry film.

Ian goes in to see Kelly. He tells her that Lushion called him. She says she didn’t do it, and he asks what she told them. She says they asked a lot of questions, but she had no idea what they were talking about. She kept telling them that over and over. She asks how much longer; she needs to see her son. Ian says he’s working on it, but it might be difficult. They have a search warrant for her house. She says let them look; she didn’t do anything. (I’ll bet Natalie moving those knives is going to come back to haunt Kelly.) Ian says there’s a call in to the judge. It’s late, but they’re working on it. He needs her to calm down. He says they’ll get her out, but she has to be patient. He needs to know everything she knows about the victim. Every detail.

Alex rocks the baby. She hears something outside. It’s Randal dancing to music blasting from his car because he’s a total lunatic. She goes outside, and he says he’ll turn it down, but then starts singing to it. She goes back inside, and he laughs like a maniac. Why does no one else in the neighborhood ever see what a nut this guy is? At least the mailman knows now. (See last week.)

Esperanza goes to see Eddie in the interrogation room. She asks what he did, and he says her, a lot. Eddie makes crass people look good. She hopes he has a photographic memory, because he’s never touching her again. He tells her that she says that every time. She tells him this is serious. He says the two of them are serious too. She asks if he remembers they have a daughter together. As much as she hates it, he needs to think of what’s best for her. She asks if this is related to him stealing from drug dealers, and he asks if Lushion sent her in there. She says he’s dumber than she thought; the FBI is involved. He says Lushion and Steve are FBI. She says she knew the drugs made him paranoid, but this is ridiculous. She tells him he’s so not worth it. He says if he’s not getting some, get out. She says he needs to tell them everything. He says he doesn’t know what anyone is talking about. She tells him cooperate to get a lesser deal. He suggests she go home and take care of their daughter. He calls her the biggest whore on the block, and she says she’s a better parent than he is. He accuses her of throwing him under the bus, but she says they have a mountain of evidence. It’s mind-boggling how crazy he is. He says he’s Eddie; that’s’ all she needs to know. And on that note, she leaves.

Esperanza tells Lushion that Eddie isn’t talking. Lushion’s phone rings. It’s Alex. She asks if he can do her a favor. He says he will, if she can do him one – stop making people think the kid is his. She says it’s Randal doing that, and she’s sorry. Lushion says he’ll talk to him. Alex says while he’s doing that, can he do something about the loud music Randal is playing? Lushion can hear it in the background, but says he can’t help her. Alex tells him that the baby is asleep, and Randal is doing it on purpose. Lushion says he’ll cruise by in a little bit. Natalie calls again, but Lushion asks if it can wait, and she says it can. Really?

Brad finds Marcie on the side of the road. She tells him that she’s sorry. He says she really does have a flat. She says she wouldn’t do that to him, but he says she’ll do anything to upset Alex. Marcie says usually, yeah, but not this time. He sees a nail in the tire, and asks if she’s sure she didn’t do it. She says she didn’t, and asks if he was with her. He says yes, and she asks how it’s going. He doesn’t want to talk about it, and he’s just going to fix the tire. He tells Marcie that Alex was upset she called. Why? Why is he telling her that? It’s exactly what she wants to hear. She says she wasn’t about to call Randal. Brad says when she knows he’s with her, meaning Alex, Marcie needs to exhaust her other options first. He tells her that he’s going to try to make this work, and if she’s a good friend, she’ll want this for him. Marcie says that she wants him to be happy, and won’t call this late again.

She asks if he’s moved back in, and he says somewhat; he doesn’t have any of his things there yet. She says home is where the heart is, and he says when she puts it that way, he’s moved in. Marcie says, another thing to come to terms with. Brad says he hasn’t used the jack in a while, and she says she can tell. They could be there all night. She tells him he looks good doing it.

Randal continues to dance in the driveway. Lushion pulls up, and tells him to turn it down. Randal says, sorry, can’t hear you, and I laugh. Lushion says he’s not kidding. Randal says there’s no law against it, and Lushion says there is: it’s called disturbing the peace. Lushion reaches into the car, and turns it down himself. Randal asks if it was too loud. Lushion tells him keep it up and he’s going to jail. He tells Randal to keep it off, and he means it. Randal calls him the new sheriff on the block, keeping the peace and banging the ladies. He says the baby looks a lot like Lushion, and Lushion says that’s not his kid. Randal asks whose it is then. Lushion asks what’s wrong with him? He cheats on his wife, and still doesn’t get it. He calls Randal a sociopath, and Randal says he’s heard that. (Insert cuckoo clock sound here.) Lushion says he has to stop this; he’s doing everything to make Alex crazy. Randal accuses him of defending his whore. Lushion says he’s warning him leave that woman alone. Randal says he’s shaking in his slippers. Lushion says that he didn’t get it when they almost hung him; what’s it going to take? Randal says he didn’t get it then; all it did was piss him off more. He says she tried to do that to him, and Lushion says he can’t blame her. Randal asks if he isn’t supposed to be an officer of the law, and Lushion tells him to stay away from her. Randal asks if he’s protecting his baby mama, and Lushion repeats stay away.

Lushion knocks on Alex’s door. She says that Randal has turned it down for now, and Lushion thinks he got the message. Alex thanks him, but she needs some advice on what to do about him. Lushion tells her to ignore him. Alex says he’s threatening to go to the police, and say that she’s the one who told her parents to go after him. Lushion asks if she did, and she says yes. He tells her that she can go to jail for it. Alex says that Randal is fine, but Lushion says she can still go down for that. He doesn’t think that Randal is going to do anything; he would have done it by now. He wants her here to harass her. That’s more important than seeing her in jail.

Randal texts Natalie that her man is at Alex’s house. She goes outside. Alex tells Lushion that she’s nervous, and he says she’ll be okay. She apologizes for Randal thinking that the nameless baby is his. Seriously, this kid will be walking before someone gives him a name. Lushion tells Alex that Natalie asked about it, and she’s not the kind of woman you want asking those questions. Alex says she’ll talk to her again. Natalie comes down the block, and Randal says they’re probably humping like rabbits, and tells her to look inside. Alex hugs Lushion, and Natalie sees them through the window.

Next time, Natalie wishes they’d hung Randal, Kelly can’t afford Ian, and Eddie threatens Steve.

Below Deck

It’s the day before charter. Everyone is hung over, but they have to get the boat ready. Chris complains, and Nico tells him work through it. Matt asks Brianna if she’d like to take a boat ride this afternoon. She says okay. She doesn’t think he’s her type, but how do you know unless you’ve had a beach picnic?

Nico says last night was a close call, and he has to check himself before he does something stupid, like cheat on his girlfriend. He wonders what the captain meant by reconfiguring the deck crew. He tells Captain Lee that Chris should just put his sunglasses on and work. In his interview, the captain says Chris acts like he doesn’t care, but he will. Kate comes into the lounge and asks Captain Lee what’s up. He tells her that he’s contemplating, and she says she prefers solution. He says, believe him, he’s working on that.

Time for the preference sheet meeting. The primaries are a couple, Bradley and Summer Smith, who own the Smith Family Homes luxury contracting company. Bradley is also a trained gourmet chef, although it doesn’t say where he trained. Matt says that doctors make the worst patients, and chefs make the worst dinner guests. The couple coming with them is celebrating a 10^th anniversary, and they’ve also requested a casino themed party. They don’t drink, which Captain Lee doesn’t think he’s seen before.

Brianna is getting the afternoon off, and Jen asks if she has to be promiscuous to get some downtime. Kate says the next time it will be her. Matt tells us about breaking up with his girlfriend, and that he hasn’t been on a first date in a long time. He has a beer to relax, and then another one, and then some more. Nico says he’s absolutely wasted. Matt thinks that Bri needs a guy who’s thoughtful and romantic, and he’s focused on impressing her. They leave in a small boat, and have cocktails, and Kate tells the crew that fifty bucks says she’s pregnant when she gets back. Nico says somebody has to do it if he can’t.

Jen calls herself Cinderella. Matt and Brianna go to a beach called Happy Bay that turns out to be a nude beach. Believe me, no one wants to see this. This bay is happy for some people, but it wouldn’t be for me. Matt lays out the picnic, and Bri thinks it’s a good start. Matt says he’s lucky to be with her. They joke about the naked people. He asks if they can travel the world in an airstream. He says he’s jealous of the freedom of the naked people, and she’s welcome to be nude. He drinks a lot of Jack Daniels from the bottle.

Matt says they have a lot in common. Bri doesn’t want to make things awkward. In her interview, she says he’s obviously drunk, and this is probably most awkward date she’s ever been on. He starts talking about them falling in love. In his interview, Matt says that there were three people on the date; him, her, and Jack, who was speaking the loudest. He asks if she likes him, but she says not like that right now. He babbles a lot, and at one point calls her an a-hole. Gee, this is going well.

They get back to the boat, and Matt sings Smooth Operator. Omg.  He uses a broom handle for a mic, asks the guys if they know who he is, and says he’s going to t-rex the sh*t out of her, while making tiny dinosaur arms. Nico doesn’t think it went that good if he’s that drunk. Bri tells Bruno that she made it clear she wasn’t interested. Bruno says he thought they hooked up, since she looks happy, but she says it’s the opposite. The crew calls it a night. Man, is that dude going to be hung over.

Matt admits to acting like an idiot. Jen asks Bri about the date. She says it was awkward. He was drunk, and she wasn’t into him. In her interview, Jen says she should be happy to have any date. A new bosun suddenly shows up, surprising Baker. Captain Lee tells us that EJ is from Canada, and he’s known him a few years. He’ll know what he’s getting into. The first thing he tells EJ is that the crew is extremely green, which is why he’s there. He says that Nico is doing a good job, but isn’t ready to be a bosun. Baker tells Nico that Captain Lee said if they can’t get up to speed, he’s going to get rid of some people. EJ asks the captain about Nico, and Captain Lee says that he’s overwhelmed. Nico and EJ are introduced. The captain tells Nico to make sure he has bunk, and get him settled in. Nico is pissed, thinking that he deserves to be bosun.

Matt says that it’s no fun waking up with hangover and regrets. I second that. He talks about wrecking a previous relationship with partying, but wasn’t ready to give it up. In his interview, EJ says that he’s always up for a challenge. He can adapt easily, and gets an adrenaline rush out of something new. Chris thinks it’s ridiculous. Nico hopes no one is leaving. He introduces EJ to the rest of the crew. Kate says there’s no HR on a yacht, and if there was, they’d be in big trouble.

Baker hoped they were hiring someone new, but the captain surprised them. She wonders who she’s supposed to take orders from. Jen tells Chris he’ll be sleeping in the crew mess. He’s like, are you kidding me?

The guests board. Kate gives the tour. There’s a toilet that does a whole lot of automatic things, and Kate says guests love it because it’s the peak of excessive gratuitous luxury. I dunno. That toilet scares me. Primary guest Bradley hassles Matt in the galley. Matt tells Bradley that he likes to cook simply, which seems good with him. The Valor moves out. Nico thinks it sucks that he has to report to EJ, who uses the phrase cool beans repeatedly. Kate doesn’t get virgin cocktails, and thinks you might as well drink water. Bri asks if Matt is quiet because of the excursion. He tells her that he’s just tired, and not to worry about him. Matt downs an energy drink, and chops vegetables.

Lunch is chicken vegetable salad with tomato vinaigrette, and the guests are happy. Kate asks if Matt is feeling okay. EJ says that the crew hasn’t been taught properly, and something needs to change. Captain Lee asks Bri how the guests are, and she says boring. Baker puts Chris’s stuff in her closet, so it‘s not in the crew mess.

The water toys are out, and the guests enjoy the afternoon in St. Martin.

Nico tells Bri that EJ has experience, but he does too, and should be bosun. He feels blindsided, and wonders if he’s going home. He says that it’s like a slap in the face.

Dinner is scallops with brussels sprout risotto. I know from Gordon Ramsay that risotto can be a bitch. Kate says it has to be a good dinner. Drunk guests notice mistakes less, and she hopes that Matt brings out a great dish. One steak is way past medium, and Bradley points out that the risotto is undercooked. Kate asks if they want something else, but that’s a no. She gives Matt the feedback, and in her interview, says that anyone else on the planet would be mortified if they failed the one job they had, but Matt is just shrugging it off. He does seem like a zombie in the galley. He makes bananas foster for dessert. Kate tells us that it’s a strange, weird, and lazy choice; this isn’t TGI Friday’s.

EJ asks Nico what the typical evening scenario is, and thinks they should be doing windows when it’s quiet. Nico says they usually chill at night. EJ thinks they should tackle things in downtime. In his interview, Nico says this is as good as it’s going to get. The guests complain that there wasn’t enough ice cream in the dessert. Jen asks if they’d like to see the chef, but they tell her to just relay the message.

The guests gather on the deck for fireworks that Matt set up on shore. At first, the display is a bit of a dud, but then it rallies. Kate tells us that when all else fails, set something on fire. Since they’re not drinking, it’s all she has.

Matt tosses and turns. Chris talks about a previous guest’s fake boobs to EJ, who doesn’t receive that too well. In his interview, he says he wants to lead by example. He shows Baker some tips on cleaning the deck, and demonstrates some knots for Bruno. He wants them to be better; it’s what they deserve. Jen tells Kate about the desert. Kate says that maybe Matt will be like the fireworks – worrisome in the beginning, but with a great finale.

Baker says it’s weird that EJ is in charge of Nico now. Captain Lee confers with EJ, and asks about his first impression. EJ says he prefers to run it harder, and not have the crew walking around aimlessly. In his interview, he says that Nico set the tone of it being lackadaisical, but he pronounces it lazy-daisical. He says it needs to change, and tells the captain that he and Nico need to get on the same page because they have to be tight. Captain Lee agrees.

In the morning, Nico gives Chris his bed. Chris couldn’t sleep because of the noise and light. Bradley meets Matt in the galley, asking for coffee. Matt radios Jen, who is late for her shift, but still needs to mess endlessly with her hair. He keeps calling her, but she doesn’t answer. Kate wonders how you can be late on a yacht, where there’s no commute. You just roll out of bed and you’re there. I was a mother’s helper for a neighbor for six years, and I totally get that.

The captain says they’re going to Rendezvous Bay in Anguilla. He asks how Nico is doing, and Nico asks if this is a permanent crew situation. The captain says he isn’t sure, and Nico whines that there are too many people. In his interview, Captain Lee says he didn’t bring in EJ for his health, and Nico needs to suck it up, cupcake. Everyone is working, and EJ lectures Baker about using something called Wink. In his interview, he says he had a father in the Navy, and hard work was instilled in him. I identify. He believes that if you work hard and do your job, you’ll come out on top. Bri asks if Matt got any rest. She tells Jen that Matt seems down.

The anchor chain scrapes the paint on the boat. Everyone rushes around getting breakfast started. Matt says that the last few days have given him perspective on how much he has to get it together. It’s not a good feeling, having a guest be critical. He says that if you don’t recognize that you’re messing up, you’ll keep messing up. After the anchor is in the pocket, Nico points out to EJ that a break wasn’t disengaged, and blah-blah-blah about it. In his interview, EJ feels like Nico wants him to screw up, so he looks good, but he has another thing coming to him. In his interview, Nico says strike one. He calls EJ an effing idiot. This is just proving that EJ is right, and isn’t a good look for Nico.

Next time, there’s a leak in the laundry room, the Valor drifts toward another boat, and Jen and Bri argue. It’s also worth mentioning that there was a clip with Captain Lee saying that it’s embarrassing, and when the pressure comes, everything they’ve learned gets forgotten. It brought to mind it’s go-go not cry-cry from Planet Terror.

👸 I’m glad my first name is not also a noun. Just sayin’.