What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Valentin wants to explain to Nina why he’s involved with Cassandra.

Monica tells Anna and Jordan that Andre abandoned his job without so much as a resignation letter. Jordan tells Anna there’s an APB out for him in connection with the Jason Morgan case.

Diane tells Carly that she can’t do anything until Jason tells her to. Carly is disappointed. She leaves, and Diane thinks she doesn’t have the pull she used to with him. Alexis sits down and asks her how Nora came to defend Olivia-J. Diane asks why and Alexis says it’s complicated. Diane is like, seriously?

Real Jason watches Sam from the balcony. He almost walks in, but Other Jason comes home. He talks sweet talk to Sam, and Real Jason comes busting in, telling him get away, and shoots him. Sam asks what had he done, and says she loves Other Jason. Real Jason wakes up yelling her name, and wonders what he’s supposed to do.

Sam asks where Other Jason was last night.

Nina says infidelity is a deal breaker. Valentin says he isn’t being unfaithful, but Nina says his lips were on his hers. He says hers were on his; there’s a difference. When she told him she was in town, he knew he had to meet her, and tell her his life has changed. They’d barely exchanged pleasantries when she kissed him, and Nelle must have been there with her camera. Nina says he could have pushed her off, but he says she’s a complicated part of his past. She’s accepted he’s not available, but she’s not going anywhere. He has to work with her.

Diane asks for one reason Alexis would want that information. She thinks Scotty tried to manipulate Alexis, begging her to visit Julian, where he’d tug at her heartstrings, and she’d get involved in the appeal, looking for details that chowderhead (meaning Scotty) missed. Alexis says she did visit Julian. He’d been attacked, and was bruised with broken bones. He’s going to get himself killed if someone doesn’t do something. Diane says that man nearly destroyed her.

Anna asks if Jordan thinks Andre knew something, and Jordan says according to Franco. He was going to therapy, and Andre provided a death certificate for Andrew. Anna says it was obviously forged, and wonders what Andre is covering up. Jordan tells her that’s why she has an APB out. Anna feels sorry for the Jasons. She knows what it’s like to be confronted with a twin. She wonders if Andre knows who is who.

Other Jason – okay, lets’ start calling him Andrew, because I will totally flip out if he’s not – tells Sam he had a lot to think about. Sam asks if he came to any conclusions. He says he may have twin, but he’s not taking his life. He asks if Sam is with him, and she says of course. He tells her it’s going to be a fight. Sonny and Carly are backing his brother. Sam asks what if he doesn’t pursue it, and Andrew thinks he wouldn’t be there otherwise. It doesn’t matter if he’s crazy or lying. He’s coming after everything Andrew loves, and rest assured he’s not letting him do it. He says, that face. People look at him and think he’s Jason. He can’t prove it because he’s Jason Morgan, her husband.

Carly knocks at Jason’s door. When he answers, she hugs him.

Nina asks if Valentin is going to rob jewelry stores, and split the profits with Cassandra between kisses. He says no kissing and no robbing, and explains that Cassandra is dealing in synthetic opioids. Nina says he’d never be a drug trafficker, no matter how much money is involved. He says it’s not the money; it’s the only way to stop her – take her down from the inside.

Alexis says Julian didn’t ask to see her, and was upset that Scotty told her about him being roughed up. Julian wouldn’t even talk about the attack. Diane says he wants Alexis to forget and move on, and Alexis says, more or less. Diane thinks he’s either pushing her away, so she does the opposite, or he’s sincere. If Julian is a good man, she should honor his sacrifice, and if he’s bad, she should refuse to fall into the trap. Take him at his word, forget, and move on. Alexis says if dies, and she could have done something, she’ll never forgive herself.

Sam says Jason has no documents to prove who he is. How can he lay claim to Aurora? Andrew doesn’t think he’s after the company, but Sonny will advise him to. He wants the guy to be him, the way he used to be. He couldn’t give Sonny more, but Sonny thinks this guy will. Before they end up in court, he needs to get the company up and going, so it will be harder to challenge. Sam says even if his brother doesn’t exist from a legal standpoint, they share DNA, and share the same family.

Carly tells Jason it will be a while before stops hugging him. He tells her it’s okay; he likes that she’s glad to see him. He’s glad to see her. She says without him helping her navigate life, and catching her when she falls, she missed him all the time. He tells her that he’s sorry he wasn’t there. Carly tells him now she has to clean up the messes she made. She handed his life to someone else. Jason says he has a twin brother; now everything makes sense. She says no matter how much she wanted it to be true, not once did she look in his eyes and see Jason’s eyes looking back. If she’d had the courage to face it, he wouldn’t be in this situation, watching Sam go home with Andrew. Jason says Sam loves him, and he can’t move against him without hurting her. He won’t do that.

Nina says, so Valentin is just pretending he’s working with Cassandra while he’s servicing his own agenda. Valentin says he’s no expert on ethics and morals, but Cassandra has money; this is only greed on her part. Nina says she deserves what she gets, but there’s a flaw in his plan. He’s going undercover with no credentials. Valentin tells her that he’s serving in an unofficial capacity to the agent in charge – Anna.

Carly tells Jason that Diane is waiting at the MetroCourt. She’s waiting on fingerprint records, but there’s some question about the federal one. The good news is, he’s been arrested more than fifty times. Ha-ha! Jason doesn’t care; he’s just happy to be home. He tells Carly to just think of another name for him, but not Andrew. She says he should be fighting for his own name, and fighting for Sam. Jason tells her that he had a nightmare. He dreamt that he saw Sam and Andrew together, and shot him. He was dying, and Sam was next to him, saying she loved him. Carly says it sounds awful, but it was just a dream. He doesn’t want Sam caught in middle. Carly says she is, and the only way out is to make a real choice. His brother has to accept who he is, and Sam has to decide if she wants to be with him or him, the real and only Jason Morgan.

There’s a knock at door, and Carly answers, even though it’s Jason’s room. It’s Monica, who asks if it’s the wrong time. Carly says she was just leaving. She asks Jason to please talk to Diane. Monica doesn’t want to intrude; she just wants to look at him. She’s so happy to see him.

Andrew says he hopes when Sam says sharing a family, she means the Quartermaines. He’s not sharing his wife and kids. He babbles unreasonably, and Sam says it’s Sonny they’re really fighting. Even if Sonny wants his brother to be him, he won’t put the kids in the mix. When Sonny sees something he wants, he goes for it. Andrew thinks they should adopt his tactics, starting with Aurora. He’s interviewing for a CEO today. Sam looks at the resume, and tells Andrew to be tough on him. He promises they’ll keep everything that’s theirs. He leaves, and Sam flashes back to her and Jason when we were all practically children.

Carly knocks on the door. She asks if he’s here, and Sam says no. She says good. She needs to talk to her about Jason.

Andrew meets with the potential CEO, Peter. He asks how Peter became available just when they were looking for someone with his background.

Alexis tells Diane that she went to Llanview, hoping for access to Olivia-J, but Nora stonewalled her, saying it wasn’t in her client’s best interest. Diane says any competent attorney would have done the same. She hates to admit it, but Nora is extremely competent. Alexis wonders who she’s billing it to. He siblings wouldn’t be paying, and it can’t be pro bono, since Nora is in a different state. Who would pay a heavy-hitter like Nora to defend Olivia, and why?

Peter tells Andrew that things were unhappy at the company, and he was offered a golden parachute. He was ready for a change, found out the media company had a new owner, and thought it was the perfect opportunity. Andrew asks what he knows about the company, and Peter says it was brutally mismanaged. The only consistent performer is Crimson, but he thinks with work and a coherent business plan, it can turn around. He says it was a good idea to change the name. He asks if Andrew is actually Jason Morgan. Oddly, Andrew doesn’t knock over any tables.

Monica is surprised to see Jason is there. She thought he’d be at Sonny’s. He says he wanted to be on his own, and she says he’s always been independent. Susan is dead, and Heather is evil, and it’s he fault he and his brother grew up apart. They’re lives would have been different if they’d known. Jason says he doesn’t know about Andrew, but likes his life. The only thing he wishes went differently was his unfairness to the family, especially her. She says he was confused, and they didn’t handle it right. They were all wrong. She tells him that she doesn’t know how to act or what to say. He says she doesn’t have to know. He knows she loves him, and he loves her too. They hug.

Nina thinks Valentin has more of a desire to work closely with Anna than stopping the drug trade. He tells her that he’d turned Anna down when she asked. Nina wonders what changed his mind, and he says her and Charlotte. Cassandra orchestrated their meeting, and it was a warning shot. She can take away what he loves. It was an implied threat, and he has to act. He can’t eliminate her; it would only create more problems than it would solve. He has to bring her down. As far as Cassandra knows, he’s under her thumb. Nina says to be clear, she hates the idea of him working with Anna with the fiery passion of a thousand burning suns, but it’s necessary. Valentin says maybe it’s fair that the past bit him, but he’s sorry she has to be dragged in to the mess. She says apology accepted on one condition – he let her help. She thinks she’s in the perfect position to manipulate Cassandra. Valentin says he can’t forbid her to do anything, but he’d rather kill Cassandra than let her go near Nina. She and Charlotte are his life. He can handle anything if they’re safe. Nina tells him okay; be careful, and no unnecessary contact with Anna. He promises there won’t be, and she leaves for work.

Jason tells Monica not to worry, but she says she does, and worries about Andrew too. He’s been wonderful; open and accepting, and they kind of have a bond. Jason says Andrew is easier than him. Monica says, no, they’re different, but she loves them both very much. She knows it will take time to sort things out, and could be a painful journey. She hopes at the end they can be brothers. He’s not sure that’s possible, but she says he kind of has a gift for making the impossible possible. She leaves, and he heaves a sigh, as the returned Jason is wont to do.

Peter says that Andrew bought the company under the name of Jason Morgan. Andrew says there’s no question about his legal identity, but he did have a twin that surfaced. There are rumblings that he might go after what’s his, but the company belongs to him and his wife, and he has every intention of keeping it. They shake hands.

Diane mentions to Alexis that Charlotte’s custody hearing was the same day as Olivia’s hearings. Alexis thinks it’s no coincidence. If Valentin’s lawyer defended Olivia, it’s because he wanted her to. She leaves, and Andrew approaches. He says he’s sure Diane has heard about his twin. He needs to cut him off at the pass before he comes after the company. Diane says she called him because she’s resigning as his attorney. It’s a conflict of interest. She can’t defend his claim that he’s Jason Morgan, because she doesn’t believe he is.

Sam tells Carly to skip it; she already knows what Carly is going to say. Carly tells her she can’t stand by and watch Sam make a mistake. She owes her an apology. She wanted Andrew to be Jason so bad, she pressured him to be someone else, and pressured Sam to accept it. Andrew is a good man, but not Jason. Deep down, Sam knows it. Carly rationalized and made excuses, but that stopped working when she saw him again. She’d thought Sonny had lost his mind, until she saw him and knew. She’d know him anywhere, and so does Sam. She says when Sam looked in eyes, she knew in her heart and soul. The only reason she’s not saying it is out of loyalty to the man she slept with last night. Sam says she didn’t sleep with anyone last night.

Anna tells Jordan that Andre was working on a way to copy a person’s memory and place it in someone else. Jordan thinks that’s disturbing, but Anna says it’s a useful application, even though the ethics are indefensible. The WSB wouldn’t follow through with it, so Andre left. Jordan asks if Anna thinks he pursued it, and Anna says that would explain things.

We see Andre’s passport.

Alexis visits Valentin. She tells him that she needs information. He asks if they’re on speaking terms, and she asks what his association with Olivia-J is.

Nina calls Cassandra. She tells her that she had a cancellation, and asks if she wants to meet at the MetroCourt.

Andrew tells Diane it didn’t take long. If she turns over any of his records to his twin, he’ll have her disbarred. She says his records are sealed, and she’s sending them over to him. He tells her to warn her client to stay away from his family. She says her client is Jason Morgan, and she looks forward to proving it. He tells her to go to hell. Andrew runs into Jason coming out of the elevator, and tells him that his lawyer is waiting.

Diane tells Jason that she just informed his brother that she intends to prove he’s Jason Morgan, and he’s not happy. Jason says it’s just a name. He doesn’t want anyone hurt over this. She says speaking as a lawyer, from what she remembers, he’s a rare client who actually listens, and takes advice. She wants to work in his best interest, but he says he’s worried about Sam’s best interest. She tells him that his name and assets are under a cloud right now, and when he has the legal rights, he can do what he wants, and can sign them over to Sam. He asks what he needs to do, and she tells him to think back to the first time he was arrested in 1996. She needs to subpoena the files

Sam tells Carly that Andrew never came to bed last night. He was strategizing on how to fight her and Sonny. He’s afraid his best friends will take everything away, including her, and hand it over to someone else. Carly says it’s not up to her. She knows Sam’s the one who has to make choice, and she’s sorry for that. Andrew is going to fight, but Jason won’t; it’s not in his nature, and she knows it. He’s just going to step back and wait; be there when she needs him, and back off when she doesn’t. He thinks that’s what will make her happy, and that’s all that matters to him, but it won’t make her happy in her heart. Andrew is a good man and loves her, but Jason owns her heart and soul, and she owns his. It will be the hardest thing she’s ever done, but the best thing for everyone, especially Andrew. Carly leaves, and Sam remembers old stuff again. She’s drunk, and wants to dance with Jason. They fall on floor, and she kisses him.

Tomorrow, Nathan tells Amy to take her own advice, Lulu has great news, Scotty tells Julian they need a miracle to get him out, and Nina knows Cassandra lied.

If Loving You is Wrong

Lushion tells Natalie that the gun was stolen. She says it doesn’t make any sense. He wants her to find out where the gun came from – now. Natalie thought she was legit, but he tells her not to give the number out again. She calls, but the number is out of service. Lushion asks if she knows how this looks for Kelly; like she stole Ramsey’s gun to kill him. The DA will be all over it. He says they’re going over there right now. They go outside, and see Travis lurking around Kelly’s house.

Lushion ask where he’s coming from and what he’s doing there. He stammers that he was stopping by, and Lushion tells him to come over there. He tells Natalie to get in the house. He asks what Travis was doing and he says knocking on the door. Lushion says the door is right there. Travis says she prefers him to go to the back. Lushion tells him not to move. He knocks on Kelly’s door. He asks if Travis was knocking, but she didn’t even know he was there. Travis tells her not to act like that, and she says she told him to stay away. Lushion asks if he doesn’t have a restraining order against her, and Travis says he does. Lushion asks why he’s hanging around then, and he says he’d heard she had trouble. Lushion tells him he’s under arrest. Travis asks if Lushion has any idea who his parents are. Lushion tells him to quit whining like a little bitch, cuffs him, and puts him in the car.

Lushion goes around back to check it out. Travis sits in the car laughing, because he’s batsh*t crazy. Kelly asks if he thinks it’s funny. He says she’s funny; all this is funny. He tells her that she’s going to jail for life. She messed with the wrong guy, leading him on and ignoring him. Kelly asks if that’s why he killed Ramsey, and called Justice. He pretends not to know what she’s talking about, and tells her she’ll wish she never met him. She already does, and he says she ain’t seen nothin’ yet. She tells him to give it his best shot. He says he did, but she couldn’t take it. Lushion tells her to go inside. He’s taking Travis in, and sending over a detective to look around.

Steven sits in his car outside of Esperanza’s house. She pulls up, and asks why he’s there. He tells her that he’s checking on her, and she says she already has one crazy ass showing up. Steven says he wanted to make sure she was okay, and he’s sorry. He knows how Eddie can get. Esperanza says he’d never touch her, so Steven can go. He asks if he can come in. He can help her clean up. She tells him that he created the mess, and he says it wasn’t his fault. She thinks it’s a ploy to get in the house, but he says no. He tells her she’s amazing, and they can finish what they started. She asks if it’s a marathon. She doesn’t know how they got here, but they don’t know each other. He tells her to ask him a question. She asks when her birthday is, and he knows. She asks what her favorite color is, and he says she doesn’t have one. She’s surprised, and he tells her that he knows by watching her. She says that’s creepy, and he says she wanted it just as bad as he did. She tells him they just work together. He asks again to come in, and she says, purple. He asks if that’s a yes, and when she got a favorite color. She tells him today, when she saw his underwear. He asks if he can please come in, and she closes the door.

Natalie – who never walks, but strides – goes over to Kelly’s house. She asks if Kelly is all right. Kelly wonders what she’s supposed to do. She can’t keep taking this anymore. Natalie says Lushion wants to tell her something about the gun, and Kelly asks her what it is. She says the gun was stolen, but she’d thought it was legit. Kelly says she’ll call, and Natalie tells her the number is disconnected. She says the bad part – Kelly is like, that’s not the bad part? – is that it was stolen from Ramsey. Kelly asks if Travis knew where it was stolen from, and how Natalie does. She says Natalie set her girl up, and Natalie promises to go by the gun seller’s house. Kelly quietly freaks.

Ian and Marcie go to dinner. She doesn’t believe he wanted to celebrate, and he says he likes her. He finds her very attractive. She thanks him, but says she’s not interested. He says it’s just a client/realtor dinner then. He jokingly asks what’s wrong with him? She says she just had enough with her ex relationship. He tells her okay, but he’s buying. She tells him that she doesn’t have much of an appetite. He asks if it’s the company, but she says it’s the ex company. He asks if he’s still bothering her, and says they can sue him. He’s sued people into submission using the law as a tool. She probably won’t win, but he’ll leave her alone. Marcie says he doesn’t know him. Ian’s phone rings. He says he’s at dinner, he doesn’t know the client, and to call Larry. They don’t know where he is, so Ian says call the client’s parents, and he’s on his way. After he hangs up, he tells Marcie it can wait. The client is a spoiled rich kid in trouble, and his parents pay them well. He wants to toast, and she says just water for her. He asks if she doesn’t drink, and she says not lately.

Lushion tells Travis quit playing with him. He plops Travis in a chair. Eddie gets in Lushion’s face. He’s angry because Lushion interfered with him walloping Steven. He says his tattoo is all over that broad. Lushion points out Travis, and asks if Eddie sees this fool. That’s what a stalker looks like, and he’ll be their next one. Eddie threatens Lushion and Steven, and Lushion tells him if he thinks he’s pulling anther Andrew, think again. Eddie says people disappear all the time, and to tell that punk if he touches Esperanza again, it’s his ass. Steven comes in, and Lushion says Eddie has something to tell him. Eddie tells Steven to watch his back, and Steven says he’d rather watch Esperanza’s. BA-DUM-CHH! Eddie says keep coming at her, and he’ll be sorry. He tells Steven that says they can wrap it up real quick mano a mano. Steven says he’ll meet him after the shift. Lushion tells them to go somewhere. Eddie leaves, and Steven asks if everything is okay here. Lushion says it is.

Lushion asks what Travis was doing in Kelly’s backyard. Travis says he already told him, but Lushion says he told him nothing. Travis asks why he should say anything without his lawyer. He asks if it isn’t the detectives who ask the questions? Lushion asks why he’s stalking Kelly, but Travis insists he’s not stalking anybody; she’s lying. He tells Lushion that Officer Dion knows the whole story. He asks if Lushion is on her side, and Lushion says maybe. Travis maintains he didn’t do anything. Lushion asks if he’s sure about that; she’s just lying about all of this? He tells Travis that he’s going to nail his ass to the wall. Travis asks for what, and Lushion says for what he’s been doing. Lushion wants to talk about Ramsey. Travis pretends not to know who that is, and Lushion says Travis murdered him. Travis says he’s a lover not a fighter. He’s a youth pastor, and thou shalt not kill. Lushion asks how he did it; how’d he take Ramsey down? Travis says he doesn’t know what Lushion is talking about. Lushion says Ramsey was a big guy with skills and moves, and Travis asks if he’s talking about the busted ass dude next door to Kelly. Lushion says the memories come flooding back, and asks again how he did it with no skills, not knowing how to fight, and looking bitchy. Travis says he can fight if the situation presents itself. Lushion asks how he took Ramsey down, and tells him that Justice had some interesting stories about how Ramsey died. Travis suggests maybe he did it. Lushion says maybe Travis called him and gave him the details. Travis wishes he could help.

Steve brings in Ian. Lushion says don’t tell him Ian is this kid’s lawyer. Ian calls Travis “Donovan Cain,” Lushion says his name is Travis, and Ian says he didn’t put it together, asking if this is the kid harassing Kelly. He’s not going to be able to rep her. His partner reps Travis’s family and church; he has no choice. They pay a lot to the firm. Lushion says it’s crazy. Ian tells him that he’s sorry, and takes Travis out. Steven says that’s messed up. Lushion says what’s messed up is what he’s doing to Kelly, and he’s not going to stop. He wants Steven to look up Donovan.

Alex and Brad watch TV. Someone bangs on the door. It’s Eddie, who walks right in. Brad says it’s late, get out, and pushes him out the door. Eddie tells him that Esperanza has lost her mind; she’s banging Steven, Brad says, sorry, and Eddie says he doesn’t look it. Brad admits he’s not; she’s single. Eddie says she’s the mother of his kid, and his ass gets whatever he wants. Brad tells him to go home, and he says he doesn’t have one. Brad says he can’t stay there, and he asks Brad to make a call. Brad tells him to go. Eddie offers to do him a favor in return, and Brad says, just go. Eddie repeats that he doesn’t have a home to go to, and Brad says, go somewhere. Eddie says he’ll handle it himself. Brad tells him that he doesn’t understand love, and Eddie says he understands T&A, and when he puts his mark on them, they’re his. He drives off.

Alex doesn’t want to know, and Brad agrees that she doesn’t. She tells him to throw Randal’s equipment away. He picks it up, and asks if the light has been on the whole time; that isn’t good. Alex says it’s disconnected, and Brad says it must have back up battery. He tells her to be quiet. It has a motion sensor, and records video and audio. Brad disables it. Alex is concerned that Randal heard everything they said about the doctor, but Brad thinks if he would have been over there already. Maybe it was out of range. Alex wants him to destroy it. He’s sorry he brought it in. Alex looks like she has a headache.

Randal and Larry go back to Randal’s house. They’re laughing, and saying what a great time it was. Larry wants more to drink, and Randal says he can’t hold his liquor. Larry says Randal likes when he’s out of control. Randal pours some hefty shots of tequila (bleh), and they down them. They laugh some more. Larry asks if Randal remembers when they snuck in the girls’ dorm. He tried to film them, but had a loud ass VHS camera. They have another shot. Randal says Larry got them kicked out of school, and Larry says, but they had a lot of fun. He asks if Randal remembers the girls they did together. Larry says he learned the hard way. Randal says Larry took longer, and teases him. Larry tells him to go to hell, and Randal says he’s been there and back next door. Larry wonders why Randal doesn’t let it go. Randal says no way; she humiliated him. Larry says he humiliated her and Marcie. Randal says they were talking about Alex; he doesn’t care about Marcie because she screwed neighbor in his shed. Larry asks if it’s the same guy whose wife Randal screwed, Randal doesn’t want to do this right now. Larry just wants him to move on; there are lots of women out there for him. Randal doesn’t want lots of women, and Larry says that’s a switch. Randal wants the two women in his life to suffer, and Larry asks for how long? He says until he’s satisfied. Larry says that’s him, and Randal concurs. Larry tells Randal that Marcie really loved him loved him. Randal says she loved him so much, she did the neighbor in his shed, Larry says she was hurt, and Randal asks if that’s why she moved in with him. Larry asks when it ends, and Randal says when she’s on her knees. Larry tells him she’s been through so much, and she’s pregnant. Randal is like, what? Larry realizes he made a mistake, and pretends like he doesn’t know what he said.

Next time, Randal and Larry fight, Alex tells Marcie that her husband doesn’t belong to her, and Travis confronts Kelly. It’s also the finale.

Below Deck

Jen wants to strangle Kate, but she’s a good person, and trying to suppress the feeling. Bri and Nico cuddle. Bri says it’s difficult working with someone who thinks they’re working hard, when they’re not. She thinks Jen is so tired, she’s delirious, and not helping. She tells Jen to go to bed, and finishes cleaning up by herself.

EJ says he’ll miss Baker. He’ll miss 90% of the crew, but there are some he could do without. He and Baker lie on cushions on the deck. He can’t believe he’s leaving tomorrow. She says they can make the most of it. He does a couple of push-ups, and they go to bed separately. I’m confused.

Captain Lee says it’s safe to take guests out for morning cruise. Nico is feeling a little better. He’s put things in perspective, and is going to be team player and do good job. Kate tells him not to be too cool for a sling. Jen stumbles out of her bunk. In the galley, Kate says the longer she’s late, the more she’ll pay for it. Jen doesn’t feel good, and Kate says none of them do. Kate tells her she can handle it. In her interview, Kate says Jen has problems and she gives her solutions, but she finds more problems in the solutions that then become new problems. The Valor moves out, and everyone gets excited. The captain says once around the park, and he’s only doing it for the money. Nico realizes he’s been a d*ck to EJ. He hasn’t been in the right frame of mind since his brother died. He has to respect EJ, and admit the deck team has come a long way.

The breakfast special is Eggs Benedict – my favorite! Matt loves a challenge, and he’s being challenged to every extent. He’s tired of seeing their faces though. They begin to head back to the marina, and the guests complain. In his interview, EJ says the deck team is in a better place than when he came; they’re much more proficient. The guests start packing.

Everyone says goodbye. Eden says it was great, but there was disappointment. It was a big deal to birthday boy Jason and Michaela, but she thinks it was a downer for them too. She doesn’t even know where they are, and thinks they left. What was the crew supposed to do about the weather? Change it?  These people are worse than eBay buyers, who want the moon for nothing.

Eden says the crew was great, but if it was her restaurant, a lot of things would have been sent back. In his interview, Matt says nice of her to wait until the last minute to destroy his food in front of the crew and captain. He bets her restaurant stinks. She says the food could have been taken to another level. Kate has never worked a cruise where the primaries just left the boat. I wonder what this means for the tip.

Captain Lee thought it went well for not having gotten off the dock. He’s surprised with the assessment, and doesn’t see what they could have done differently. There is a tip, and it’s $15K or $1363 each. The captain tells them that EJ is leaving to get back to his other boat, and thanks him for helping out. EJ did everything he asked him to, and well. In his interview, Captain Lee says Nico is going to have to step up. They all bid farewell to EJ. The captain says his wife, Maryann is coming. In his interview, he says it’s very rare for her to join him, and he’s excited, but has enough to worry about. Jen wonders why everybody is getting lovin’ except her.

In her interview, Baker is sorry things didn’t get to take off with her and EJ, but plans on seeing him after the season is over. Nico is glad he’s leaving, and boot him back to Canada. He’s ready to take charge. I wonder what happened to his better attitude of five minutes ago. EJ says his goodbyes, telling everyone to finish hard. He kisses baker’s hand. In his interview, he says he’s leaving them in a much better place. The deck team has graduated, and Nico will make an excellent bosun, if he drops the ego, and stops being a child. He still has a long way to go.

The next charter is a group of eight women, the primary being Shelly, who’s an attorney. The captain says they’re not requesting anything crazy, but want gourmet meals. In his interview, Captain Lee says it’s embarrassing to have a guest shred his chef a second time. We flash back to the first time and the Bananas Foster ice cream debacle. They want a Caribbean Carnival theme night with a surf and turf dinner, entertainment, and games. The captain also tells them that they’re getting a new deckhand. Nico hopes whoever it is, isn’t green.

Here comes Maryann. In his interview, the captain says the season has been trying with a green interior and deckhands, and crappy weather. Seeing Maryann will be a pleasure.

In her interview, Jen says Kate failed her as a boss and mentor. She looked up to her, but Kate was abusive. She has no respect for her. Kate talks about how much she loves the captain and Maryann (♫ Here on Gilligan’s Isle! ♫). She tells us they were high school sweethearts. Maryann is quite cute

Nico is excited to get off the boat and spend time with Bri. It’s been high stress all season. The crew heads out to dinner, with Captain Lee and Maryann joining them. Bri asks how they met, and Maryann says her girlfriends knew him, and he doesn’t remember meeting her. He asks how she can hold him responsible for something he doesn’t remember, and she says they met again a month later, and that was it. We see some old photos of them as a couple, and the crew toasts to them. In his interview, Captain Lee says that they’ve been married forty-two years, and Maryann has the patience of a saint to put up with him and five kids. He was lucky enough to marry his best friend. He tells the crew that relationships take work. He cares more about making his wife happy than making himself happy. If he sees a smile on her face, he’s good. He says he’s very fortunate, and I’m impressed. It’s nice to see the other side of him. Nico and Bri leave. Nico says it’s nice to see a functional relationship in yachting. You don’t see it often, especially with captains.

They talk about losing EJ, and make a toast. Bri and Nico arrive at the hotel, and the rest go back to the boat. In her interview, Kate says Bruno was quiet, Matt didn’t get obnoxious drunk, and Nico is getting lucky. The dinner was a success.

Kate calls someone about their website for acrobats who do yachts. I swear, there’s something for everyone out there. She can’t believe she’s never done a carnival theme party before. In his interview, Captain Lee says he and Maryann don’t communicate all that much when he’s at sea, and it was a treat to see her. He tells us the finish line is in sight. Maryann leaves.

The captain says Nico is back in charge, and he wants to finish strong. The weather should be good. The new deckhand arrives, and Kate says, look who it is, and they go to commercial. I’m wracking my brain for previous deckhands, and can only remember Danny.

It’s Kyle in flamingo shorts. They flash back to when he was on before, and now I remember him somewhat. Captain Lee says he knows the boat and he’s competent. He’s a character, but he can count on Kyle to fulfill their need for next two charters. He’s British, and one of the guys they need subtitles for because his accent is so thick. He was bunkmates with Kate, and she wishes she could give him a warm welcome, but she’s too busy. Nico interduces him around. He tells Kyle they’ve had green deckhands, and a Boy Scout bosun who pissed him off. Kyle has been on cargo ships, and tells us he’s become more of a provider, and it’s made him grow up.

In his interview, the captain says he was embarrassed as hell last charter. The crew had better be on their toes, or give their soul to Jesus, because their asses belong to him. He’s quite the quipster, our Captain Lee. The ladies arrive, and Kate does the tour. The deckhands remark how heavy their suitcases are, and it reminds me of my father asking me if I carried bricks in my purse. Kate says girls’ trips are one of two ways, either super fun or super high maintenance. Shelly tells them to keep the champagne flowing. Nico says the pressure is back on. Drinks happen. Kyle tells Jen he likes her. He could win and argument with her easily. They should get married. I also remember Kyle being a bit of a weirdo.

Nico tells the guests that he’s getting toys out. Shelly asks what kind of toys, and another guest says they like toys. Shelly thinks Nico should take of his shirt. In his interview, Nico says he loves cougars, something I will never be. I liked them older when I was younger. Matt says he has a lot to prove after the last charter. He has a clean slate, and he’s ready to cook. The ladies are served a beautiful salad, and say Matt is amazing.

Kyle says his type of girl doesn’t necessarily need a vagina, and I remember he had a trans girlfriend. Bruno says he doesn’t look at gender, but how he feels. He’s had both girlfriends and boyfriends, and looks at sexuality as fluid. His heart falls in love with a beautiful heart. This is all too poetic for me

The dreaded slide is set up. Nico is taking what he’s learned, and apply it to now. In the galley, Jen says she hasn’t been whoring around as long as Kate, and Kate asks how old her daughter is. Jen says Kate is taking too far, which I think is overly sensitive, since she started it and that was a funny remark in context.

Kate makes stuff with feathers, and they get ready for Caribbean party. Jen tells Kate it was a low blow, and Kate says Jen said she whored around. Jen wants her not to be miserable, and Kate says Jen doesn’t know enough to determine that; she’s highly out of line. Jen says it’s friend to friend, and Kate says Jen isn’t her friend. In her interview, Kate says she was blindsided. She thought they were having fun banter, and Jen brought in her personal life when she knows nothing about her. She’s just being mean.

The table is colorful and glorious. Jen thinks Kate crossed the line, but doesn’t think an apology will happen. The captain hangs around the kitchen, asking if the food is under control. Matt says they’re writing the for tomorrow. Bruno is helping, and Captain Lee says he has every confidence that Matt can come up with the menu on his own. He wonders why Matt is depending on a deckhand for ideas. The guests love the surf and turf. Shelly says it would be a great last meal. When the mostly clean plates come back, Matt says the ladies did a good job. He and Bruno agree they’re tigers

After dinner, Kate leads them upstairs, where an acrobat does amazing things, hanging from a giant ring. Kate tells us it’s nice to have someone else bending over backwards for the guests. The ladies want Nico to twirl on the ring.

Kyle watches Jen, and asks how the dating scene is. She tells him nothing exciting, and he says he’ll take her out. He guarantees two things – it will be an effing blast, and she’ll feel a lot better about herself. Jen isn’t too interested, but thinks it’s a welcome change to have someone talking nice to her. Captain Lee calls Kate to the wheelhouse. He’s concerned with what saw in the galley. He wants to pull Bruno out of there. In her interview, Kate agrees he spends too much time there, but thinks it might make the situation worse. The captain calls Nico next, and says he thinks Bruno is hindering Matt, and wants him doing deckhand things. In his interview, the captain thinks Matt has an unknown fear of putting himself out there. He’s hoping he’ll piss Matt off so much, he’ll want to show that SOB. He says the next charter is important.

Bri suggests she and Nico travel after the season is over. The Valor heads to St. Martin. Kate tells Jen that she’s still grumpy about what Jen said. Jen tells Kate if her boss implies she’s a whore, she’s going to stand up for herself. She thinks they’re just going in circles, and when she’s pushed to the boiling point, it’s best to walk away. Nico tells Bruno they need him on the deck, so no more helping Matt. Bruno has no comment, but thinks it’s unfair.

The captain calls Matt to the bridge, and asks if he’s running out of gas. Matt says he’s good. Captain Lee wants him to pull out all the stops. He thought last night’s dinner was okay, but he wasn’t blown away. Matt should get out of his comfort zone, and Bruno needs to get out of the galley. In his interview, Matt says the guests claimed it was the best meal they ever ate, but he’ll surpass it. In his interview, he says he’s burnt out. The girlfriend thing didn’t work out, and the guests have been critical. He can’t wait for the season to be done.

Next time, Shelley sings to the captain, Jen argues with Bruno, and Bri is called a whore.

🍻 New show RelationShep, starring Shep from Southern Charm, begins Monday, December 4^th at 10 pm.

🍚 I hate when a fortune cookie has some saying like home is where the heart is. They’re supposed to tell me who I’m going to meet or where I’m going to travel or something like that. They’re not proverb cookies.

⚓ Views of the Captain and his Lady…