What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

I missed the very beginning, but everything is self-explanatory. Valentin is in the hospital for observation. That’s about it.

On the phone, Jackie tells Robert that she’s gotten four texts from him, but no information. What’s going on? He says her stepson is critical, and being prepped for surgery. They’re waiting for word on him. He asks if there’s anything he can do, and she says, just keep her posted. And look after her boy. He says, will do, and she thanks him. He tells her, that’s what friends are for. She hangs up, and says, Finn.

Valentin gets out of his hospital bed, and puts his shoes on. He grabs his jacket, but Robert is in the doorway. He asks where Valentin thinks he’s going.  

In the OR with Finn, Peter yells that help is needed in  there. Portia asks, what happened? and Peter says, Finn was saying something about Anna. She announces, code blue, and Peter asks if Finn is okay. Apparently, he’s never watched any medical shows. Chase pops in, and asks if Peter knows where Maxie is, but Portia yells to keep him out. He and Peter are pushed out of the OR.

Anna says Alex doesn’t want to hurt Maxie or the baby, but Alex says, that depends on how quickly Maxie learns to mind her manners. Maxie says she’s so sorry, but kidnapping and bullets make her cranky. Alex laughs, and says, no wonder Peter is infatuated. Anna says Alex’s plan to kill her went sideways, and her getaway isn’t going any better. Why not get Maxie out of harm’s way, and they can settle this sister to sister? Alex says, good idea; keep it in the family. Wait… Maxie is family. She’s Peter’s fiancé. Maxie says if Alex thinks she’s getting an invitation to the wedding after this, she’s sorely mistaken. Alex asks if Anna heard that. Maxie is confused about the seating arrangements. Why doesn’t Anna set her straight? Anna throws something, distracting Alex, and shoots at her. Alex shoots back, but Anna’s next shot hits Alex.

Sonny tells Julian, have a seat, but Julian says he’ll stand. Sonny asks if he wants some water, coffee, or tea, but what Julian wants is to know what he’s doing there. Jason answers the house phone, and says Ava is there. She knows Sonny has Julian. What does he want to do? Sonny says, let her in, and tells Julian, it must be nice to have his little sister come to his rescue. Julian says he doesn’t need to be rescued, and Ava comes in. She says, what the hell? Sonny asks if there’s any word on Ryan, and she says the cops will notify her if his condition changes. Sonny tells her, keep him in the loop, and she asks why she would do that after Sonny dragged her brother across town like a criminal. It’s insane. Sonny says he just wants to ask Julian some questions. If Sonny is happy with the answers, Julian can go home. If he answers wrong, he doesn’t go home.   

Josslyn and Dev sit down in Kelly’s, and Josslyn says, they beat Trina there. He asks if she’s surprised, and she says, no, but it’s a bummer Cameron’s not there. She wanted them all together for her birthday. He says, nothing comes between Cameron and his soccer ball, and Josslyn says, he’s gone all the time now. Dev says, Josslyn and Cameron have a million memories; they have hardly any. Josslyn asks what he means; they live in the same house. Dev says, maybe that’s the problem. She’s gotten so used to seeing him, she doesn’t act like she sees him. He still sees her though. He takes a wrapped present out of his backpack, and tells her, happy birthday.

Ava says she thought she and Sonny had an agreement to go along, even if they don’t always get along. He says he didn’t invite her there. She showed up unannounced, and she’s sticking her nose into things that aren’t her business. She says Julian is her brother; he is her business. Sonny tells her, that says a lot, if he’s right – and she’d better hope he’s not. Julian tells him, get to the point, and Sonny says Julian has been holding out on them. Julian says he’s glad Sonny cleared that up, and Sonny says Julian was on the docks the night Wiley was kidnapped. He was there with Nelle. Ava looks at Julian.

Alex slumps, saying, Anna got her. Anna asks if Maxie is still with them, and Alex reloads her gun. Anna says, the harbor patrol is behind them, and the Coastguard is in front of them. Whoever was picking Alex up is long gone; she doesn’t have a ride. There’s no way she can escape. She tells Alex not to make it harder than it already is. Maxie pops up, and tells Anna, she’s gone. Anna comes out, and says, she’s so sorry. Is Maxie all right? Maxie says she’s sorry. She was so busy trying to escape, she wasn’t paying attention to Alex. Anna says, she’s not going to get far, and Maxie asks if what Anna said was true about the harbor patrol and Coastguard, but Anna says, no. She got to the dock alone, and the Haunted Star was on its way out. She appropriated it, and promises she’ll get it back to them. She asks if Maxie is good, and Maxie says, good is relative, but she’s fine. Ann gives her a bottle of water, and Maxie says Anna is leaving her there? Anna says Alex would never hurt Maxie or the baby; she’s safe. Maxie says, what about Anna? and Anna says, someone has to stop Alex, and she’s the only one who can do it. Hydrate.

A nurse hands Valentin a tube for inhaling oxygen, and he reluctantly puts it on. He asks Robert how Anna is, and Robert says, she’s gone after Alex. Valentin says, Robert let her go by herself? but Robert says he didn’t have much of an option. He asks, what happened? and Valentin says, Alex shot Finn, and took off with Maxie as a hostage. Robert asks if Finn is alive, and Valentin says, he’s being prepped for surgery. Robert says, while he was coordinating with the police department, Anna took off. Finn mumbled something about open water, so he alerted the Coastguard. Since he’s had more experience with fugitives, he’d appreciate it if Valentin backed off. Valentin says Robert knows he has to kill Alex, and Robert says, it’s long overdue. It’s something Anna can’t bring herself to do, but he sure hopes Valentin does.

A doctor goes into the OR, and Peter says, another doctor; that’s a good sign. Chase says, or bad. It’s surreal. He was just at the dinner table with Finn a few hours ago. Now he’s hoping Finn doesn’t die. Peter asks what Finn was doing that he got shot, and Chase says, he doesn’t know the details, but Anna’s twin Alex showed up in Port Charles. She shot Finn, and took Maxie hostage.

Anna follows a trail of Alex’s blood out to the deck. Alex sneaks down the stairs behind her.

Julian asks if Sonny really thinks he’d help Nelle. He didn’t. Sonny says, Nelle was at the Nurses Ball when Wiley was abducted. Ava says, this is absurd. Julian loves Wiley; he’d never let any harm come to him. Sonny says, know who cut out early from the Nurses Ball? and Ava says, she did, to avoid him and Carly ripping into her. Julian says he knows he’s persona non grata, so he wisely stayed away. Give him one good reason that he’d let Nelle put Wiley in danger. Sonny says, the same reason he married Nelle. She had something on him. It must have been pretty dirty for him to get in bed with her. Julian says he married Nelle in a moment of weakness, and Sonny says Julian was on the docks with Nelle. Julian asks how Sonny knows that. The PCPD has no evidence of it. Was Sonny there? Did he set up cameras? Or maybe he has a witness.

Josslyn tells Dev that he didn’t have to, but he says he wanted to. He tells her to open it, and she says, he had it monogrammed. He asks if she likes it, and she says, it’s beautiful, and thanks him. He says he figured she could use a new one after what happened to her first journal. She asks if she told him that she put it in storage, and he says he used to see her carry it around. He noticed she stopped, and thought she must have filled it. She says she actually stopped writing, and he says, so it’s useless, but she says, not at all. He says he can take it back, and she says, so someone with the exact same initials can buy it? She doesn’t want him to take it back; she loves it. He leans in for a kiss.  

Maxie tries to get reception on her phone, and asks if nautical people don’t use cell phones. She says she’ll go to the bridge and yell for help.

Peter asks how Anna’s twin was able to shoot Chase’s brother and kidnap Maxie. Chase says, she was impersonating Anna, and Peter says that explains the bizarre dinner. Chase says she shot Finn, and took Maxie, and Peter says he has to do something. He can mobilize his security team, or hire helicopters to look for them. Chase says he’ll just get in the way, and Peter asks if he’s just supposed to sit there and wait. And pray. He’s never been the best at prayer. No surprise, his father didn’t believe in God. He was shipped to boarding school before there was much chance for religion to leave an impression. He doesn’t know where Maxie is, and he doesn’t know what to do or where to start looking. Chase says he’ll call the station, and find out what leads they have. Peter asks if that isn’t against policy, and Chase asks if Peter thinks he gives a damn. They need to find Maxie and bring her home. Robert joins them, and says, Anna is on it. The police department and the Bureau are working together to bring Alex in. Finding Maxie is the only thing they need to worry about, and Chase needs to be there for his brother. Robert asks how Finn is, and Chase says, when he got there, an alarm was going off. Portia comes out, and Chase asks her to please tell him that his brother is okay.   

Valentin puts his shoes on again, and Martin shows up. Valentin thanks Martin for coming, and Martin says, an honorable attorney looks after his client when they’re laid low. What a relief that Valentin survived. Valentin says Martin doesn’t have to bury his retainer, but Martin says he has a lakefront property. He asks Valentin whose rhubarb he rubbed the wrong way, and how much does he have to sue for?  

Maxie sees Alex, and calls to Anna. Anna turns and shoots. Alex falls to the ground.

Portia tells Chase that Finn has cardiac something-something. The gunshot caused fluid to accumulate around the membrane surrounding the heart, putting pressure on it, and preventing it from pumping normally. Chase asks what Finn needs, and she says they’ll do surgery to remove the bullet, drain the fluid, and repair any damage. Chase asks if he’ll be okay after that, and Portia says, then they’ll see how it goes, and leaves.   

Martin says, a real life evil twin? Will wonders never cease. Valentin asks if this falls under attorney/client privilege, and Martin tells him, don’t worry. He hasn’t done anything wrong. Valentin says, nothing he can be held accountable for, and Martin asks what help he can offer. Valentin says his will is out of date, and he wants to revisit custody. Martin thought he was good with Lulu, but Valentin says, Lulu’s estranged, unstable ex is back, and could crack at any moment, taking Lulu and Charlotte with him. Martin suggests they revisit it in the morning. Valentin says he almost died. He needs to know Charlotte is protected if, God forbid, things go wrong and Anna’s sister is the one who comes home.

Anna tells Alex, don’t move, and asks Maxie to get something to stanch the bleeding. She tells Alex that she’ll get a doctor, and Alex laughs. Alex says she told Anna someone was going to die today. Turns out it’s her. She says Anna will want this back, and returns Anna’s wedding ring, saying she thinks Anna can get the blood off. Anna tells her to conserve her energy, and Alex says she has to tell Anna something. She can’t save Peter. He’s so much like herself. Anna says, no; he’s not. It doesn’t matter anyway. He’s going to have a baby, and marry Maxie, and be happy. He’ll have a happy life. Alex says, too late. She thought Anna would take care of him. That she’d go back and get him, and love him. Alex cries a little, and says, and raise him, but Anna didn’t, and she has to live with that. Anna calls to Maxie, and when her back is turned, Alex pulls herself to the opening in the railing, and goes off the deck, into the water. Maxie returns, and asks, what happened? Did Alex get away? Anna says, she’s gone, and Maxie says she’s so sorry. Anna says they have to get her home.

Sonny tells Julian, don’t ask how he knows what he knows. Tell him. Was Julian on the docks or not? Ava says Julian doesn’t have to answer that. Let’s go. Julian doesn’t think that’s an option, but Ava says Sonny can’t hold them prisoner. Julian tells Sonny, yes. He found out Nelle was running, and he went to stop her. He was ready with a bullet, but someone intervened, and Nelle got away. Sonny says, describe them, and Julian says, he was a tall, bald, Black guy. He found out later the guy had been with the PCPD. Marcus Taggert. What’s really funny is, he looked pretty healthy for a dead guy.

Dev kisses Josslyn, and Trina comes in. She apologizes for being late. Her mother wanted her to have dinner, so she ran home to eat. Josslyn says she realizes they’re in a restaurant, right? Trina says, for cupcakes. When her mom said dinner, Trina thinks she meant nourishment. Josslyn asks if frosting isn’t a food group, and Trina says she wishes. What did she miss? Josslyn says, not much. Dev got her an awesome journal for her birthday. She shows Trina, who says, nice. Dev says Josslyn doesn’t have to pretend to like it, but Josslyn says she’s not. Dev says, really? Then why is she acting like he’s garbage, when she was all over him before? Was she lying then or now? Josslyn says, neither. Her feelings changed. She’s sorry. She cares about him, just not in the way he wants her to. He says, because Cameron is better? and she tells him, she never said that. Trina suggests he back off, but Dev says Cameron doesn’t like Josslyn. FYI, he doesn’t like Trina either. He bounces back and forth because they let him. he pushes them against each other because he’s a user and a selfish tool. They just don’t see it. Trina tells him, shut up.

Sonny says, Julian is seeing dead people? He needs to have that checked out. Julian says, what’s funny is, he’s telling Sonny and Jason that Taggert is still alive, but they don’t seem surprised. Why is that? Sonny advises Julian to keep his ghost sighting to himself, and Julian asks, why? Sonny says, A, because involving the police is a bad thing, and B, it could hurt innocent people. Does he realize how much Taggert’s daughter has gone through? Now Julian is seeing things that aren’t there. Julian says, maybe Sonny is right. Going to the police is a mistake, but you know who might be interested to find out Taggert is still breathing? Cyrus. If Sonny makes a move against him – anything at all – Julian will make sure Cyrus knows Taggert is not only alive, but Sonny is working with him. On the other hand, nobody has to know anything if he leaves. Sonny tells Julian that he knows his way out, and Julian and Ava leave. Jason looks at Sonny who shakes his head.

Trina asks Dev, what’s wrong with him? and Josslyn says he’s out of line. He says, it’s true, even if they refuse to see it. He walks out, and Trina asks, what’s wrong with him? Josslyn says she has no idea, and follows him out. She asks him to wait, and he asks what she wants. She asks if he’s okay, and he says, what does she think? She says she doesn’t know what’s going on, but clearly, he’s upset. She doesn’t want to lose him as a friend. He’s like a brother to her. He asks if she knows what would happen if she and Cameron ever did get together. Josslyn would find a reason to dump Cameron because he’ll never be good enough for her. No one will ever live up to precious Oscar. He walks away.

Portia tells Chase that Finn is in surgery, and he asks how long before they know how it went. She says, probably not until morning, and suggests he get some rest in the meantime. Robert says he couldn’t help but hear her say earlier that they’d see how it goes. Surgery isn’t the end, is it? She says if they don’t get the response they need, they’ll have to do a pericardiectomy. He says, English, please, and she says, removing the sack around the heart. He says, it sounds like something people might need, but she says, you can live without it. He says, but it’s better to keep it? and she says, better to keep it.

Chase goes to the chapel, and says, hang in there, champ; you got this. That’s what he said when they wheeled Finn in to the OR. His own brother, and that was the best he could come up with. It makes him wonder if, as a doctor, how many times Finn offered hope to patients. What would Finn have said in that moment? He cries, and says he doesn’t know, but he wants to. Please, God, give him a chance to know.   

Peter asks Robert if there’s any word on his mother, but Robert says, no. He asks if Robert would tell him if there was, and Robert says he would. Anna was trying to rescue Maxie, who’s carrying Peter’s child. He doesn’t see any ulterior motive or agenda. Just a scared guy. Peter says, it makes no sense why Alex is there, or why she’d take Maxie, and Robert says he believes she came to assume Anna’s identity permanently. Peter says, that explains the explosion at the warehouse, but why Maxie? Robert says he doesn’t know. Maybe Alex thought she’d be easier to manage than Finn; more inclined to cooperate. Peter asks if there’s any chance Alex might let Maxie go, but Robert says, who knows what’s going on in Alex’s head? He hopes Anna gets there first. Peter tells him, Finn was saying something about Alex, and how it could help Anna and Maxie. Robert says, unless Finn knows where Alex is headed and how she’s getting there, it doesn’t matter.

Valentin tells Martin, Alex hates him like God hates sin, and he hates her back. She knows he can identify her, and she’s going to target him, or worse, target Charlotte. He’s not allowing that to happen. He’s going to do what everyone else has been hesitant to do; put a bullet in Alex’s heart. Martin says he was under the impression that Valentin had just been asphyxiated. Is he sure he’s up for that kind of fight? Robert shows up, and Martin jets. Robert says he’s not leaving Alex to Valentin. It was Valentin’s stupid idea to lure her to Port Charles to begin with. Valentin says Robert is welcome to come along, but with or without Robert, he’s going to find Alex. He leaves, and Robert follows him.

Anna brings Maxie into the hospital. Valentin’s eyes get so big, I think they’re going to pop out. Peter runs to Maxie and hugs her. Anna smiles.

Josslyn comes back, and tells Trina, that went well. Trina asks what was happening when she walked in, and Josslyn says, Dev was trying to kiss her. She told him that she doesn’t feel that way, and apparently he’s very upset. Trina says, ya think? Josslyn says, the things he was saying about Cameron… Trina doesn’t believe them, does she? Trina shakes her head no, and Ava walks in. She asks Trina if she’s missing anything, and hands Trina her phone. She says her brother found it. Trina thanks her, saying, she was scared she wouldn’t be able to get backup off the Cloud. Now she has the pictures of her and her dad back. She hugs Ava.  

Jason tells Sonny, Julian is up to his neck in something that can take him down if it came out. Sonny says he was struggling to cover; so was Ava. Jason says he’s not sure if she knows what it is, but she’s desperate to protect Julian. Sonny says, she can’t.  

Julian asks Ava if Trina was happy to get her phone back, and Ava says, she was thrilled. She was terrified she’d lost the pictures of her father. Julian says, her very much alive father, and Ava hopes he didn’t say anything to Cyrus. Cyrus kidnapped Trina once. If he knows her father is alive, he’ll do it again, and that cannot happen. Cyrus can never know Taggert is out there, understand? Sonny is right about one thing. Trina has been through enough. She needs Julian to promise not to do anything to harm her. Julian says he promises. He had to get Sonny to back off, and it was the only way. Of course (🍷) he’s not going to say anything to Cyrus. Okay? She says, okay. I honestly expected Cyrus to show up and say, tell me what?   

Anna asks how Finn is, and Robert says, they don’t know. He’s been prepped for surgery, and is in the OR now. Portia comes out and introduces herself to Anna. She says it will probably be a while before they know anything. They’ll know for sure in the morning. Peter asks if Maxie is sure she’s okay, and she promises she’s fine. She thanks Anna, and tells Peter that she doesn’t know what she would have done without his mom. She was so brave on The Haunted Star; she saved the day. His aunt is seriously deranged. She doesn’t know where Alex was taking her, but there was a shootout, and Alex escaped. She almost shot Anna. Peter says, Maxie didn’t put herself in the middle of a gunfight, did she? and Maxie says, it’s harder to stop a boat than a car. She called the harbor master, but not one button said stop engine, so she just pressed the red one. Anna walks past them, and Robert asks, what happened? She says, Alex. She’s dead. Valentin’s eyes get big again.  

Anna sits with Chase in the chapel. He says, Maxie? and she says, Maxie is fine; not even a scratch. Chase wishes he could say the same for Finn.

Jackie calls Gregory, and says she’s changing planes on her way to Astoria. He needs to get to Port Charles asap. His sons need him.

Anna tells Chase, no more trouble with Alex at least. She’s so sorry. She takes his hand, and he puts his other hand on top of hers. They sit quietly.  

Tomorrow, Willow goes to see Chase, Anna cries to Robert, and Cyrus tells Lulu that he’s in the position to make her life very difficult.

Below Deck

Morris Bay, Antigua. Eddie is pissed about Avery, and says, it’s a bummer. Captain Lee makes calls to get a new deckhand, but has no luck. Eddie says Avery was his most experienced guy, and in his interview, he says Avery was his best guy. He knew exactly what he was doing, and now the workload has increased by 85%. Francesca tells Izzy to pick up the pace, and Izzy wishes she was a deckhand. Primary Charley tells the captain that it’s usually rocky waters, but this is rocky service. Tonight’s dinner is a tasting menu of different countries, and Charley tells Rachel, go for it. The more countries represented, the better. He says, she’ll figure it out. In her interview, Rachel says, it’s a tasting menu from different nations, plus vegan, plus keto. She can do this. Dame mas, por favor (give me more, please).

The deckhands deal with the jet skis, and the captain says, it’s like the Three Bears trying to play football. I’m not quite sure what that means, but it would definitely be awkward. Charley hounds Francesca about the dinner décor, and in his interview, Captain Lee says, they have high maintenance charter guests, a new crew, he was injured, and they’re a man down. It’s the perfect storm. If they don’t pull it together, they’re going to be screwed. He meets with the crew to tell them about Avery leaving. He says he knows the guests are demanding, but they just have to suck it up, and get through it. He knows they can, and he’s going to try to get someone asap.

Guest Lexi says she wants one of the deckhands to put on a speedo for her birthday. She really wants it. Charley and the guests pick out costumes for the evening. Francesca tells Elizabeth, nail it together. Izzy says she’s lost; she has no direction. The dinner includes a cocktail paired with each dish, and Francesca and Elizabeth try to figure something out. Charley says he sees some bags not unpacked, and tells Francesca. In Francesca’s interview, she says she has so much going on, she doesn’t have enough hands, but with three stews, they should be able to unpack. She’s getting pissed that Charley keeps telling her that he’s doing her job, when he keeps pulling her away from her job. The word no doesn’t exist in yachting, and they have to make it happen. She tells Izzy to do the unpacking, although I can’t imagine wanting someone else to unpack my stuff. James and Shane roll up the slide, and James says, the slide is an effing nightmare. I’m pretty sure everyone who’s ever dealt with it feels the same way. In James’s interview, he says, now it’s become less fun and more work. Francesca finds faux cherry blossoms for Japan’s decoration. In Izzy’s interview, she asks, who brings 5000 pieces of clothing for a three-day charter. How many times are you going to sh*t your pants? She prefers throwing lines, and dealing with heavy machinery. She goes to Captain Lee, and asks if she can work on deck, and he could find another stew instead of finding another deckhand. He tells her that he’ll take it under consideration. In his interview, the captain says, they’re just a few hours in, and Izzy wants to switch from interior to exterior. First, they have to get through this charter in one piece. In Francesca’s interview, she says these guests are over the top, and she’s running on two hours sleep. She hasn’t sat down all day, but she loves theme parties, and can handle Charley’s. She tells Izzy and Elizabeth to pick up the pace. There are various country’s flags everywhere, and Captain Lee says, it looks good. Charley announces, last call for glitter, and the crew gets dressed. Rachel asks Eddie if she can have someone to help, and he tells Shane, help the girls out.

In Rachel’s interview, she says she’s studied various cuisines, and loves it. You have to understand the crux of what each cuisine is. The captain hunts for a pair of black pants, and Rachel keeps radioing for service. In her interview, she says, the food is sitting there wilting and becoming cold. The guests gripe that it’s taking forever, and I want to smack the koala hat off of Charley’s head. He’s such a d-bag. I hope he tips well. Francesca tells Izzy, a-s-a-p. Charley is surprised that Rachel prepared an international menu that included their dietary restrictions. The guests applaud. Captain Lee finally finds a pair of pants, and Shane helps with cocktails. Charley tells Rachel, good job. He says Francesca looks like she’s about to pass out, and then asks if she’ll take a photo. She tells him, in a minute, and tells herself that she loves this. Eddie radios Shane, and reminds him that he’s a deckhand. He can help, but they’re behind the scenes. In his interview, Eddie says, the deck crew isn’t on the front line. Don’t get carried away. Do what you’re hired for. Elizabeth tells Shane that he’s very helpful.

In Francesca’s interview, she says they haven’t even started turn downs. She has so much on her plate, she can’t take on another stew’s responsibility. She radios Izzy to tend to the master. In Rachel’s interview, she says Francesca is spread out, which affects her. Rachel moves on to desserts, and Francesca tells Elizabeth to do cabins – and martinis. Charley tells Rachel, he can see they’re super understaffed. He’s not saying it to complain; he wants to help. In Rachel’s interview, she says, in her 14 years of yachting, she’s never had a guest tell her that she seems exhausted and they want to help. Francesca comes in, and Rachel tells her that Charley said he could tell how tired she was, and wanted to help. In Francesca’s interview, she says she’s gutted and heartbroken. She wanted to make a good impression, but that feels like it’s not happening. It really does suck. Eddie puts covers on the outside furniture. Charley announces they’re all bringing their plates to the kitchen, and the deckhands collect the garbage. Rachel tells the captain, there are issues with service; Francesca is kind of spread all over. He says he appreciates her efforts, and calls Francesca to the bridge. He asks what her assessment is of the first day, and she says, it’s hard. She starts crying, and he says he gets it. She says she has a cracked sail. She’s just tired. In the captain’s interview, he says, it’s the first day, and he’s got the chief stew there, sobbing uncontrollably. Holy sh*t. There’s no crying in yachting. Captain Lee says, they’ll get through it. Charley is just difficult. He asks what he can do to help, and she says she needs to get some rest. He says it’s a new day tomorrow, and they’ll do better. She thanks him for his support, and he says, not a problem. Eddie tells Shane, if he’s done, he can go to bed. Francesca says she’s never been this tired, and cries in her bunk.

Everyone is exhausted in the morning, and Elizabeth says she can’t even stand. Francesca says, it was the worst day ever. As chief stew, she needs to hold it together and be strong for the crew. She needs to pull it together and focus. It was the worst day ever. Day two, Francesca 2.0. She can totally do it. The captain says his ribs are sore, and Charley asks if Francesca got some rest. She says she did, and that makes him happy. Rachel hunts through the refrigerator, and says, the Alzheimer’s kicks in on day two. In her interview, she says she hit ground running. It’s a recipe for disaster. The galley isn’t well-organized, and she can roll with it for now, but it’s stressful. She’s super anal retentive. Anchor is pulled up and home, and Captain Lee says they’re out of there.

Francesca takes breakfast orders, and the guests order just about everything imaginable. In her interview, Francesca says she hates these guests. They’re not in a diner, and they only have one chef. It sounds insane. Rachel says, WTF? So many different things in an omelet; 30 toppings, and 8 different omelets for 8 different people. The guests says they want a beach picnic, and for James to talk more. Charley thinks they should put him in swim gear for them. Once again, I’m surprised at the audacity of yacht guests. Rachel curses her life, and says she doesn’t have the pans for omelets. She only has 12” pans; she’s screwed. Shane asks Eddie about markers, and in Eddie’s interview, he says, Shane encompasses the Southern California life. He’s a deckhand who needs a mentor, which is fine with him. He has an education degree in adventure.

Five Island Harbor, Antigua. Rachel tells Francesca that she has no omelet pan. The pan is too big; it’s trash. They dump the omelets in the garbage, and I cry inside, since I hate seeing wasted food. Rachel says, it’s effing atrocious. A guest who’s ordered avocado toast sends it back, since they don’t want guacamole, but sliced avocados. It might have been nice if they’d specified that to begin with. James checks the jet ski. Charley whines that Rachel messed up; he didn’t want bell peppers, and they’re in his omelet. Rachel says, it’s a special nightmare, and she’s about to lose it. Francesca says if Rachel wants to take five, that would be fine, and Rachel says, the pans were massive. It’s the worst experience she’s had in 14 years of yachting. A guest wails that he’s ready for freaking lunch already, and Francesca tells Rachel, emotions later; guests now. Francesca brings out an omelet to the big baby.   

The jet skis are ready, and the captain asks Francesca how she is and if she got some sleep. She says she did, and goes downstairs. Charley wants to discuss Lexi’s birthday dinner. Francesca says she’s setting up a black light, and Charley says, Lexi has a crush on James. He’d like for James to do body shots, if he’s willing. Francesca laughs, and Charley says they’ll have a birthday dinner, and James for dessert. Francesca tells Eddie that Lexi likes James, and would like to do a body shot off of him. Eddie tells James, he’s 100% allowed to say no, but James says he’s game for that. Eddie says that’s how they get the tip money. In James’s interview, he says, Lexi is fit, so yeah. It will be a lot of fun. At least he said fit, which is better than a lot of other descriptive words I can think of. Rachel says she’s going to step out of the galley for five seconds. In her interview, she says she’s never broken down. The guests are bitchy, but she’s a perfectionist and can do better. Francesca tells Izzy that she’s going to the beach with Eddie. Charley says Lexi’s first birthday present is James driving her to the beach. In his interview, James says he loves the guests flirting with him; it’s the best part. As long as a guest is attractive, he’ll flirt back. He’s a team player. James takes Lexi on the jet ski while the others go in the tender. They switch places and Lexi drives. Charley says, it’s the ultimate birthday present for her. In her interview, Izzy says, they all have a crush on James. It’s the accent and the eyelashes… and the body. In Shane’s interview, he says yachting is so him. He has his sunscreen, his beach shampoo, and the beautiful mountains. This is it. This is the life. He dives off the floating dock.    

Francesca tells Elizabeth to concentrate on the bar… and the cabins… and the pantry. In Elizabeth’s interview, she says she got into yachting about four years ago. She was on vacation with her best friend, and fell in love with a yachtie, and the rest is history. She got her certificate and was thrown in the thick of it. It’s what she’s used to, but these guests are extra obnoxious. Eddie unloads the tender onto the beach, and radios Shane. He gets no answer because Shane is busy goofing off. Captain Lee radios Shane, but gets nothing, so he asks Eddie what he needs. Eddie says he wants fresh guest towels for when the guests return. The captain sees Shane on the dock, and in his interview, he says, Shane isn’t answering his radio, and he’s in board shorts with no shirt. Dude. No, not on his boat.

Captain Lee tells Shane that when he’s outside, he needs to have a shirt on. Eddie tells him, always answer his radio, and Shane says, it won’t happen again. In Shane’s interview, he says he’s got to wear a shirt and hat. There’s a morning outfit and a night outfit. This is why he’s a Hawaiian shirt guy. Any time, any occasion. I dunno about that. A funeral comes to mind. On the beach, the guests relax, drink, eat, and spray champagne on each other. Francesca tells Rachel that she wants to go through dinner as soon as they can. She wants to smash it. In Rachel’s interview, she says, this charter? Not a fan right now. But at the end of the day, she’s paid a lot, and paid to be professional… somewhat. For tonight’s menu, she’s going all out. Izzy tells Eddie that she had a conversation with the captain about switching to deckhand. In Izzy’s interview, she says she’s more qualified than some on deck. A producer asks, who? and she says, Shane. Eddie has her pull the anchor onto the beach, and leave some slack. She thanks him, and he tells her, it was a great interview.

Eddie calls James to pick up the birthday girl, and the rest go back in the tender. Francesca welcomes Lexi back with a towel, and a glass of champagne with a strawberry in it, and says, happy birthday. She tells the stews that have so much to do. They need to make sure the pantry is good, and make sure everyone has drinks. Eddie tells James to go pick out a speedo, and Charley shows him an array. He tells James to take them all, and surprise them. He thinks it’s going to be James’s moment. He asks what they call speedos where James is from, and James says, budgie smugglers. HA-HA-HA! Charley tells him to choose his own budgie smuggler. James shows Captain Lee, who says, whatever. In the captain’s interview, he says, why is he not surprised? And we flash back to when Josiah put on gold lamé for some guests. The stews set up for the party, and it’s very pretty with a lot of silver and sparkle.

Charley demonstrates his own personal black light flashlight, while Shay and some other girl grumble in the bathroom about having to sit there while Lexi takes body shots off of James. The guests are seated, and the appetizers are served, edamame dumplings, followed by crab legs. One of the guests says a bunch of crabs are in wheelchairs now, and I literally lol. Rachel thinks she nailed it, and the captain tells Eddie about Izzy wanting to switch to deckhand. He says she was helpful at the beach party, and Captain Lee says, if he could replace her, it would take the burden off of Francesca. Captain Lee asks if they should make a decision now, and Eddie thinks they should. Francesca tells James, it’s showtime.

James has picked the sparkly speedo, and models it for the crew. At the table, anonymous complainer from the bathroom asks Lexi how she ended up on the jet ski with James, when Shay has the hots for him. Um… This is just a thought, but because it’s her birthday and Charley set it up? Lexi says she doesn’t know, and bathroom woman says she wouldn’t do that to a friend; she’s a girl’s girl. Guest Carlos asks Shay to step aside with him, and she asks how he could do that to her; it was embarrassing. Don’t do that to her. He says he’s done, and stomps sashays off. Rachel ices the cake. Eddie tells the others in the galley that the guests are in a huge argument, and in his interview, he says, it sounds like they’re arguing over James. It’s ridiculous. They’re deckhands not man toys. Shay says, they’re supposed to be an effing family, and this is it? Yep. This is what happens when you drink too much while trapped in close quarters together. Lexi drinks a shot, and Shay tells Lexi that she needs her downstairs. She needs to talk to Carlos. Shay tells Carlos not to dismiss her, and Charley says, this is not the time. Shay says this was a friendship, and Carlos just f***ed it up. Eddie radios Francesca, and asks if they should hold off on the cake. Charley says, honestly? Izzy and Elizabeth watch from the sidelines, and Izzy says, this is fabulous. Charley says he has no idea what Shay is talking about, but she’s ruining the moment. He says, please? For him? Eddie wonders what to do with his half-naked crew member, and Francesca tells him to hold on. Eddie asks if they can have a robe, so James’s disco ball isn’t shining in his eyes. In Izzy’s interview, she says, this is the fun of working on yachts. Two grown ass women are fighting over a guy who shaves his chest. Somehow, the guests calm down and sit down, and Francesca says they have something special planned. It’s showtime.

The cake is presented, and James twirls around. I’m not sure what his vibe is supposed to be. In his interview, he says he’s shakin’ his ass for tips, literally. He makes a feeble attempt at twerking. Charley says, James was the only one with the balls to do that – in more ways than one. Francesca tells Eddie, a man gyrating in a sparkly speedo is not for her. Shay says she’s done, and heads for her cabin. Carlos wonders who invited her on this boat. Lexi takes her shot off of James, and James goes back to change. Eddie tells him to wash the filth off. Charley follows Shay and says he can’t believe she just did that. It’s insane, and there’s no excuse. It was embarrassing. Shay says, what about her being embarrassed? Charley says, wait. They have cake.

Eddie tells Francesca, their chance of getting a tip is slim to none.

Next time, the crew goes out, Eddie says work or be gone, a 20something cruise where Eddie wonders if they have to check IDs, James says Francesca is shaggable, and Shane stands up for himself.

👩🏾‍🏫 Tonight on Chat Room, I learned a new word from Portia. Situationship, meaning when you’re in a situation with someone. I guess.  

🌊 Rushing Along…

I need to do some editing for my article on Amazon Prime’s Utopia for https://mupoentertainment.com/theresa-krakauskas/, so tea another time. If you have Prime, check Utopia out. I spent last Saturday watching season one in its entirety, and it was worth my while. Be forewarned though, it’s very violent. If someone had told me it was written and directed by Quentin Tarantino, I would have believed them. It involves a pandemic and a conspiracy, and as they say, art imitates life. Or is it the other way around? So take a look, and stay safe, stay doing good, and stay not abusing the yacht crew, if you’re ever so blessed to take a trip on one.