What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Spencer says he’s here to pick up Trina, and Trina says she’s heading out, but Marshall asks, what’s the rush? He invites Spencer in, and says he thinks they’re overdue for a chat.

Esme picks Ace up, and says, this is it. Grandmother Mayor be on the up and up, but she’s not willing to wait around and find out. She puts the money Laura gave her into her knapsack, picks it up, and opens the door, but Cameron is there, his hand raised to knock. He says, going somewhere?

A sign hangs in Charlie’s that says, Good Luck, Cameron, and Elizabeth writes out a card at one of the tables. Laura comes in, and asks how Elizabeth is holding up. Elizabeth says, letting go is hard, and Laura hugs her.

Anna tells Valentin that she thinks they should have heard from Eileen. She must have delivered the necklace by now. Valentin says, maybe she’s struck in traffic. Just give it time. They don’t have to assume the worst… yet. Eileen will convince him the necklace is real, and he’ll see the false code they engraved. Once he’s done that, he’ll make his move.

Victor looks at the necklace with a jeweler’s loupe, and Eileen asks what he’s looking for. He says, something’s missing, and she asks, what? He says, the key, turns the necklace, and says, that’s more like it. She says, he has what he needs, so are they done here? He says, to the contrary. They’re just getting started.

Anna tells Valentin that she’s convinced these codes are coordinates, but they’re not going to know until Victor takes the bait, and there’s no guarantee he’s going to fall for these fake codes. He could easily figure out someone’s trying to set him up. She has to say, she’s not in love with Eileen being their asset. Valentin says, there’s still the element of surprise. As far as Victor knows, they’re dead, and Drew Cain is completely above suspicion. He’s out of the loop. She says, it does give them the advantage, but they have to be ready for any kind of complication, and he says, one of them is taking an epic bubble bath as they speak. They just have to stay vigilant; they may have to improvise.

Eileen says she’s due back at city hall – good luck – but Victor says, city hall can wait. He’s spent years of blood, sweat, and tears to get to this moment. Surely she wants to witness it. She says she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t curious to know exactly what this is all about, and don’t call her Shirley, and he says, of course (🍷) she is, and she deserves some answers. He writes down the codes, puts the necklace back in the box, and hands it to her, saying, all hers. Call it a thank you gift. She says, this is worth millions. Doesn’t he want it? He says, fencing stolen jewelry really isn’t his style, and she says, but she’s a public official. She really doesn’t know what to do with that. He says, return it to the PCPD secure lock-up for all he cares, and she says, if he doesn’t want the necklace, what is he doing? He says, just saving the world.

Trina says, they have to go to Cam’s party early, so they can help set-up, but Marshall says, this won’t take long. Besides, didn’t she tell him that she had to get some photos ready for the party? He’s already had lunch. He promises he won’t bite. Trina tells Spencer that she won’t  be long, and goes upstairs. Marshall asks if Spencer wants to sit, and Spencer says, he knows Marshall and Trina’s family and most of Trina’s friends don’t approve of their friendship. Marshall says, except Spencer and Trina are more than just friends, aren’t they? Which changes everything.

Laura asks how the boys are dealing with their brother moving across the country, and Elizabeth says, they’re trying not to make a big deal out of it, but she can tell they’re sorry to see him go. Laura says, they’re not the only ones. She can’t imagine walking into Kelly’s and not seeing him there. Elizabeth says, it’s all she can do not to fall apart when she thinks of putting him on a plane to California. She knows it’s an incredible opportunity and a full scholarship. He’ll be playing division one soccer, and she wants him to live a full and happy life, but she wishes he was closer. Is that selfish? Laura says, no, it’s understandable. He’s her baby. Elizabeth says she wants him here where she can keep an eye on him, and Laura says she knows the feeling. They need to talk about Nikolas.

Esme says she doesn’t have to answer to Cameron. What she does is none of his business. He says he thinks it is; this is his grandmother’s house. She says, he’s Cameron Webber? Another one of Laura’s grandsons, and another one of her victims. Allegedly. He asks if that’s what her lawyers told her to say; allegedly. Actually. She actually ruined his life. She actually recorded him and his girlfriend having sex, and sent it to the whole university. She actually humiliated them, and turned what should have been a beautiful moment in their relationship into something awful. Now she doesn’t remember the hell she put him and his friends through because she lost her memory… allegedly. She tells him, come on in, and tell her more about the horrible person she was. He follows her back in, and she says she really doesn’t remember doing that, but he seems pretty adamant, so if she did, she’s really sorry. She hopes he and his girlfriend are all right. He says he doesn’t need her fake apologies; they mean nothing to him. She says, obviously, he’s angry, and she gets why he loves seeing her here, just out of prison and at the mercy of people she doesn’t trust. Karma’s a bitch, right?

Maxie sees Josslyn outside Kelly’s, and says she’s so happy she ran into her. Josslyn says, let her guess. Maxie wants to talk to her about the Nurses Ball. Maxie asks if she’s ever told Josslyn how smart she is, but Josslyn says, there’s no need to butter her up. Her grandmother told her that Maxie is trying to get everything together for the hospital’s 60^th. Anything Maxie needs, she’s in. Maxie says, great, so she’ll perform, and Josslyn says, except that. She can do phone calls and decorations… Maxie says, anybody can do that stuff. She needs talent. Josslyn’s performance in 2020 was a huge hit. (So huge, I don’t remember it.) She can practically hear Lucy screaming, I need Josslyn Jax! Josslyn says, performing is really Cam’s thing, and it would feel really weird to do it without him, and Maxie says, it’s really unfortunate Cameron is leaving before the Ball, but she could perform with Trina, right? Josslyn says, that would depend on Trina, and Maxie says, think positive. And all the performers get a plus-one. Josslyn sees Dex come into the courtyard.

Eileen says she doesn’t understand. Victor said this was the necklace that would lead him to the place he’s been searching for. Victor says, the necklace is merely the conduit to the key. The code that’s engraved on the diamond is the key that unlocks the door. She says, to saving the world? and Victor says, many years ago, he and his brothers, Stavros and Mikkos, had the means of putting the world back to right. He thought at the time they were all motivated by the same idea; mitigating the harm humanity’s done to the world. What he came to understand was, Mikkos was largely motivated by power and money. He tried to make Mikkos see sense, but by then Luke Spencer showed up with Laura and ruined everything. Now they’re running out of time. He sits down and opens his laptop, and she asks how he intends to pull them from the brink; with that code? He says, they were aware their plan may well be thwarted, so they came up with a contingency. Mikkos had the code engraved on the back of the diamond, which he now has. All that remains is for him to crack the code. Eileen flashes back to Valentin saying, this isn’t over until they crack the code and find out what it’s for, and Anna saying, until they know what Victor is after, none of them are free. Eileen asks Victor how he plans to do that.

Josslyn and Dex say hello, and Maxie asks, who’s Josslyn’s friend? Dex introduces himself, and says he works for Sonny. Maxie introduces herself, and says she was just talking to Josslyn about the Nurses Ball. His boss is one of their biggest supporters. He says, Mr. Corinthos is quite charitable, and Maxie says she’s chairing the event this year, and is actually still looking to beef up one of their more popular acts. Does he dance? He says, not in public, but Maxie says, don’t sell himself short. She’s sure he has the pecs… pipes… chops. She asks Josslyn to tell him how fun it is, and Dex asks if Josslyn sings. Maxie says, she brings the house down every year; she’s excellent. He says, so she’s performing, and Josslyn tells Maxie that she didn’t say that. Josslyn says, don’t let them keep her, and Maxie says, okay, but she’s not done with either one of them. She’s going to get some caffeine. Don’t go anywhere. She goes inside, and Josslyn says, Dex enjoyed that a little too much. He says he didn’t know she sang, and she says, there’s a lot he doesn’t know about her. There’s a lot she doesn’t know about him. I’d say so, since they’ve known each other only all of five minutes.

Cameron thought Esme was staying at Kelly’s, but she says, that would require Ace staying here with Spencer and Laura, and she won’t be separated from her son. He’s all that she has. He asks why she was leaving then, and she says, they were just taking a walk. He says, it’s kind of cold out for a baby, but she says, babies need fresh air. He says, the old Esme was better at lying than she is, and she says, okay, he caught her. But he’s not going to rat her out to his grandmother, is he? By the way, she’s not here. Maybe they were testing her with this. She obviously failed. He says he didn’t come to see his grandmother; he came to see Spencer. She says, great. Now Spencer has more ammunition to take Ace away from her. Cameron asks if she can blame Spencer for wanting to protect his baby brother, and she says, he doesn’t need to protect Ace from her. Why doesn’t Spencer believe her? So Cameron’s not going to believe her either. She’s sure he loves seeing her taking care of her baby instead of in prison, but he says he’s actually not that mad about it. Especially since he’s part of the reason she’s free.

Spencer says he knows what Marshall is thinking, and Marshall says, enlighten him. Spencer says, when Marshall sees him, all he sees is the guy who hurt Trina, more than once, and Marshall says, no need to rehash it. Spencer says, but he does, every day. He lives with the regret of hurting Trina and hates himself for it, but he does care about her. He understands Marshall is reluctant, and doesn’t blame Marshall for wanting to keep him away from her. Marshall’s thinking Spencer doesn’t deserve her, but he’s honest with himself about what he did, and the kind of person he was, and he’s trying to be a better man. He knows Marshall has no reason to believe him… Marshall says, that’s where he’s wrong. Stop beating himself up before he knocks himself out. He knows Spencer is trying. He’s been steady support for Trina, with her mother and Curtis, and before them, with Rory. Now Trina tells him that Spencer is stepping up to fight for his baby brother. Despite what Spencer may think, he can appreciate Spencer for that.

Laura says she doesn’t blame Elizabeth. She just wishes Elizabeth had trusted her enough to tell her what was going on with Nikolas. When they made her aware of Elizabeth’s immunity deal, she realized Elizabeth had gotten involved with this right after she came back from seeing her parents. Elizabeth was in a very vulnerable state, and Nikolas shouldn’t have put her in that position. Elizabeth thanks Laura for her understanding, but says she owns what she did. She shouldn’t have gone along with his plan, especially once they realized Esme wasn’t The Hook killer, but by then, they were in so deep… Laura asks why Elizabeth didn’t come to her. Elizabeth can trust her; she knows that. Elizabeth says she does, but she didn’t want to bring anyone else in and make them an accomplice. Laura’s not only the boys’ grandmother, she’s the mayor. She didn’t want to bring Laura into this mess. And more than that, she values Laura’s opinion of her. She was ashamed of what she’d done, and didn’t tell Laura because she didn’t want Laura ashamed of her too. Laura says she’s not ashamed of Elizabeth. She’s proud of Elizabeth’s courage. Elizabeth stepped forward to take care of this thing, when Nikolas left her holding the bag. Elizabeth says, Laura’s still his mom and she knows Laura really loves him. It must be hard not knowing where he is. Laura says, it is, but she honestly doesn’t know what to do with Nikolas anymore; he keeps falling back into the same trap. He makes a rash decision, then he tries to cover it up, and then he runs away. If he felt able to confide in her, he’d be here right now. He’d be with his two sons instead of who knows where; possibly indebted to Victor. She’s sorry. She shouldn’t be doing this right now. Nikolas made the choices he made, and now they’re left to deal with the consequences. Elizabeth says, or in her case, almost no consequences.

Spencer tells Marshall, that was the last thing he expected to hear, but Marshall says, don’t get used to it. But seeing him stepping up for his baby brother, Marshall can’t be anything but appreciative. Spencer thanks him, and says, it means more than he knows. Marshall says, Spencer’s baby brother is one thing; Trina is a whole ‘nother thing. He’s not going to say he doesn’t have concerns about Spencer being with Trina, especially after all this mess with Esme. Spencer says he understands, but hopes he can get Marshall to believe he wants what’s best for Trina. He’s trying to be a better man for both her and his brother. Marshall says he’s glad Spencer wants to be better for the people he cares about, but in his experience, you have to want it for yourself. Looking for validation on the outside will only lead you back to your old patterns. Or worse still, down the wrong path altogether. Trina is willing to go to great lengths for Spencer. Marshall had better see her faith in Spencer rewarded.

Cameron says, he and his friends didn’t want the DA to prosecute Esme. It was Trina who pushed for it. So she contacted her attorney Diane Miller to intervene. She then spoke to the DA to ask him to drop all the charges. Esme asks why she’d do that? Don’t they all hate her? He says, if she were going to trial now without her memories, the jury might find her not guilty. Then if she got them back, they wouldn’t be able to try her again. She says, so this isn’t about grace. It’s about keeping her in check so she can still be convicted. He says, it’s also about keeping Ace out of prison, and she says, right. Spencer’s baby brother. He and Cameron are cousins and friends. She guesses Cameron would do anything for him, and Cameron says, pretty much. Spencer needs this for his baby brother, and he’s willing to wait to see her brought to justice. Sorry if it sounds insensitive. She says, it definitely does, but she thinks it just might be the first honest thing anyone’s said to her since she got back.

Anna and Valentin cuddle on the couch, and Anna says she can’t stand not knowing what’s going on with Eileen. Why couldn’t she just wear the bloody wire? He says, there’s nothing they can do about it now. Will she humor him? She says, yeah, and he says, it occurs to him that if everything goes according to plan, they’ll be heading home, resuming their normal lives. What is the first thing she’s going to do? She says she’s going to the airport and she’s going to book herself a ticket to the bay area so she can see Robin, Emma, and Noah, and she’s going to give them the biggest hug they’ve ever had in their lives. What about him? He says he’ll probably take a road trip with Charlotte, check a couple boxes off the bucket list while reconnecting with his teenage daughter; then dive head first into ELQ, and build some serious generational wealth. She says, it’s interesting. It seems like after all these months together, once they go home, they’re not going to be spending so much time in each other’s lives.

Victor tells Eileen, the trick was to track down the encryption key, but he finally – he digs in his pocket and brings out a flashdrive – managed it. All he needed then was the Ice Princess itself. But by the time he acquired that, Luke Spencer had already sold off several pieces. It took another several years to find the right piece, but now, finally, he has everything he needs to complete what he set out to do. (Does he even what that is?) She says, saving the world, and he says, and securing a place for his family and their progeny. But saving the world comes at a cost. She asks what he means, and he says he can insure the future of his family, but countless other souls will have to pay the price… possibly for generations to come.

Josslyn says she didn’t expect to see Dex back at Kelly’s so soon, and he says he was hoping she was still around. She asks, what happened to keeping their distance? and he says, it’s harder than it sounds. He just wanted to see how she was holding up. Cameron was a little intense earlier. She asks what he said, and Dex says, just that he cares about her and doesn’t want to see her hurt. She asks what Dex said, and he tells her that he said he cares about her too, when Maxie comes back out.

😐 Sorry, there’s a gap here. Circumstances beyond my control. Cameron starts to tell Esme about someone who was even worse than she was, but was redeemed.

Cameron says, after a while, they thought he wouldn’t be able to come back from any of it, but he stuck around and made a life for himself. Not only did he find acceptance, he found love, and a family too. She says, he’s not talking about himself, is he? but he says, no. He’s talking about his stepfather… and her brother.

Trina comes downstairs, and tells Spencer that she even has the photos on a flashdrive. He thanks Marshall, and says, it was illuminating. Marshall tells them to have fun tonight, and be careful. He leaves, and Trina says, be honest. Did Marshall put Spencer’s feet to the fire? He says, they’re a little smoky, but he’s good, and Trina says she’ll talk to him. Spencer says, not necessary. Marshall was honest and wise, and gave him a lot to think about; a whole new perspective. She says, on what? and he says, us.

Eileen asks what kind of cost Victor is talking about, but he tells her not to worry. He won’t forget her contribution. She’ll be taken care of. He puts the flashdrive in, and says, now all he has to do is enter the code engraved on the back of the Ice Princess into the program, and the program will decrypt that code and turn it into a set of coordinates. The laptop beeps, and he says, wait a minute. That can’t be right. She asks, what’s going on? and he says, she betrayed him.

Elizabeth tells Laura not to misunderstand. She’s incredibly grateful the DA gave her immunity. She needs her job. She has three boys to provide for, two of which still need her on a daily basis. It would have been incredibly irresponsible of her to jeopardize their well-being. Laura says, Elizabeth doesn’t have to convince her, but it sounds like she’s trying to convince herself. Does she think she’s feeling guilty because she didn’t pay a high enough price? Elizabeth says, maybe. In hindsight, she doesn’t know how she didn’t see what a colossal mistake she was making. In the beginning, she thought she was doing the right thing. Then it started to spiral and got away from her. People got hurt, and Liesl lost Britt, and she knows she’s going to encounter more people who think she deserves to be behind bars. Laura says, Elizabeth can’t concern herself with that or them, and Elizabeth says she’s already hurt so many people she cares about. Laura and Cameron, even Epiphany. Elizabeth hasn’t heard a peep from her. She knows Epiphany is busy visiting Johns Hopkins,  but she can’t help feeling there’s a deeper reason for Epiphany’s silence. Laura hugs her and says, Elizabeth made a mistake. Everybody makes them. What’s important is how they move forward. Elizabeth didn’t disappoint her. She didn’t disappoint Cameron. And Laura would bet money she didn’t disappoint Epiphany. The people who love her still love her.

Spencer says he’s not sure, but Trina says she is. He deserves to be happy. He says, she makes him very happy, and the only thing he knows for sure is that he wants her in his life. He moves closer, and she says, that’s a relief. She has no plans of going anywhere. They kiss, and Marshall comes in, clearing his throat. He tells them, the party isn’t going to decorate itself, and Spencer says, he’s right. They should get going. He goes to the door, but Trina hangs back, and tells Marshall, whatever he told Spencer, thank you. He says he always has her back, and kisses her forehead. She leaves, and Spencer tells Marshall, adieu. Marshall says, adieu to you too, Cassadine.

Josslyn goes into Kelly’s, and sees Elizabeth. She says she’s sorry. She thought Trina would be here already. Elizabeth says, it’s nice to see her, and Josslyn says, it’s nice to see Elizabeth too. She brought Cam’s favorite pretzels. Elizabeth says, that’s nice of her (everything’s nice!), and Josslyn says, she’s really sorry she hurt Cam. She doesn’t blame Elizabeth if she’s relieved that Cameron is getting far away from her.

Cameron says, Franco was Heather’s son, which makes him Esme’s half-brother. He died. She says, great. So the one family member who would understand how she feels is gone. He says, maybe Franco can still help her. Franco worked very hard to prove his haters wrong. he rebuilt his life here in Port Charles. He knew Franco very well, and would be happy to tell her about him before he goes. She says, he’s going somewhere? and he says he got into Stanford. Ace starts fussing, and she says she was just starting to like him. She gets up to tend to the baby, and he says, there’s plenty of other people to like. She says she hasn’t met them yet, but she’s pretty sure there’s nothing for her in Port Charles. He says, she has her son, and a very generous support system, but she says, Spencer is just trying to take her baby from her, and everyone in this town is Team Spencer. Except for her mother, who’s in an insane asylum. He says, if she skips town now, she really has no one. How is she supposed to prove to everyone she’s a changed person if she leaves town the first chance she gets? She says, he has some valid points, when his phone beeps. He says he has somewhere to go. Is she going to be okay? She says, he’s been honest with her so far. He doesn’t have to act like he cares. They’ll be fine; she promises. He can go.

Eileen says she doesn’t understand, and Victor says, this program should have revealed a set of coordinates, but there’s no way these figures are right, which can only mean the encryption key or the diamond itself have been tampered with. Where exactly did she find this necklace? She says, the secure evidence locker. She bribed a police officer to let her in. He says, she told him that she thought Robert and Laura might be on to her. Is it possible they knew she was about to retrieve the necklace? She says she doesn’t think so. She went in immediately after the officer gave her access. There wasn’t time to inform Laura or Robert, or do anything with the necklace. He tells her not to lie to him, but she says she would never. What about the key? Is he sure his brother didn’t do something with the decryption key? He says he supposes it’s possible Mikkos betrayed him, and if this is the first time he’s thought about that, maybe he’s not the dude for this job. He says, perhaps the code was never meant to reveal anything to anyone but Mikkos. Selfish bastard. Taking his secret to the grave. He throws the flashdrive down, and says, dammit. Eileen eyeballs the flashdrive.

Valentin says he doesn’t like the idea of not seeing Anna every night. So once they settle in with their children, he’d like to know what’s next for them. She asks what he thinks that looks like, and he says, after spending multiple days not getting out of that amazing bed of hers? She says, it’s not very practical, and he says, practicality’s overrated. Is there something she’s not saying? She says, ever since they decided to make a go of it and get together, Victor’s been in their way. She thinks if they’re successful in putting him away, the future will look quite different. He says, yeah. If Victor’s no longer an issue, it will be much better. She tells him, that’s easy to say now, but what if, in a few months’ time, he’ll be itching for excitement or an adventure? He says he’s not a danger freak. Look who’s talking. Any time they’re together, whether they’re cheating death or chasing whoever, or at the market, looking for the perfect papaya… She says she’s not a fan of papaya (me neither), but he says, his point is this. She’s his greatest adventure. She’s the only one he needs.  

Anna decides to call Eileen. Victor paces, and says, after all these years, he’s come too far… No, no, no. He won’t be denied again. Eileen’s phone rings, and she tells Victor, the DA’s office. She says she’s in the middle of a meeting, and already told them she needs more time before getting back to the office. Anna says, time’s up. She’s out now. Keeping one eye on the flashdrive, Eileen says she’s sorry; she can’t. Valentin asks, what’s going on? and Anna says, she’s about to blow up the whole operation.

Elizabeth says she knows Cameron is hurting; Josslyn meant a lot to him. But they can mean a lot to each other as friends, and she’s pulling for that. Josslyn says, her too, and she knows how badly he wants this. She’s happy for him, but it’s hard with him leaving. There’s already this weird distance between them. Elizabeth says she has faith the two of them will see their way through it and remain friends, and Josslyn thanks her.

Dex comes back to the courtyard and says, Maxie’s still here, and she asks if he’s ready to commit to performing at the Nurses Ball. Everybody has a talent, hidden or otherwise, and she thinks she knows where to place his. He says he doesn’t know, and she tells him, think about it. He could be front and center at the most amazing even in Port Charles. As she walks out, she says, he could meet someone. He could get married. Anything could happen at the Nurses Ball. Dex smiles.

Spencer and Trina walk into Charlie’s, and Trina says, everything looks great in here. She tells Elizabeth that she brought some photos, and Elizabeth says she’ll show Trina where to put them. Laura says, Spencer made it, and he asks if Doc minds pitching in with the baby, but she says, Doc got called away. Esme is taking care of Ace. He says, she left his baby brother alone with Esme, and Laura says, Esme is perfectly capable of taking care of her own baby. She’s a guest in their house; she’s not a prisoner. Cameron walks in, followed by Esme carrying Ace.

Tomorrow, Maxie says someone has to trust her to do what’s right; Cameron has a better idea; Victor says, Eileen will leave when he says she leaves; and Anna tells someone that they have to go in there and get her out.

🏖  So when is this thing over already? On tonight’s Too Old For This Summer House, we started with the housemates leaving, but sadly, they’ll be back in no time. Meanwhile, we saw what their week was like. Paige told Craig that she hated his newly redone bathroom, and showed him the sink and wallpaper she wanted. He wanted her more involved, but also wanted her to visit more. He wondered about the next step, but she said, right now she was content where the relationship was. He asked what it looked like down the road, and in Paige’s interview, she said she loved her friends, her career, and living in NYC. Why change that just because it was their one-year anniversary or her 30^th  birthday? She wasn’t ready, and didn’t want to grow up. Paige said they were together every day; they weren’t even doing long distance. Craig asked for at least more space for his stuff, and she said she could clean out a closet, but it was for her spring coats. I have nothing to say here, since I have a lot of clothes and turned a bedroom into a closet.

Lindsay met Amanda for drinks, and said, the conversation was a long time coming. She felt there was tension because they hadn’t been able to talk. She’d thought they were getting closer, and then in the spring, Amanda was saying she and Carl were moving in to soon and that Carl had been tainted by her. We flashed back those things being said at the Reunion, and Lindsay said she felt like she had whiplash. Amanda said some hurtful things, and she didn’t know where they came from. Amanda said she’d apologized in a text. After he’d gotten together with Lindsay, Carl’s opinions changed, and she felt frustrated, but knew she should feel like he was right to support Lindsay. Tainted was the wrong word, and she’d tried to apologize afterward at the bar, but Lindsay didn’t acknowledge her. Amanda understood, but she went into a hole where she thought she’d wait until Lindsay was ready. Lindsay said, Amanda didn’t understand how sensitive she was. She was tough, but was still human and had feelings. She thought they had a friendship, then found out she was getting judged and attacked behind her back for things she didn’t even know were happening. Amanda said, Lindsay took things with anger and malice when they weren’t meant that way. She didn’t judge them moving in too soon; it just shocked her, but she processed it. It was like seeing Lindsay and Carl’s relationship change om the begnning. She was sorry for how she’d made Lindsay feel, and wanted to be friends. It should be the two couples’ summer. Lindsay apologized that it took so long, and said they were each waiting for the other to make the first move. In Amanda’s interview, she said she didn’t know if it was real, but she was tired of the tension and awkwardness. She was willing to give Lindsay the benefit of the doubt, and enjoy the rest of the summer.

Robert came back with Danielle, who said she’d love doing this more often, and told him that he was her party trick, since he was a chef. She said Carl was ready to be his sous chef, but warned him that it was different with Carl and Lindsay as a couple. They were still in the honeymoon/fairytale stage when everything was exciting and new. Robert asked if their relationship wasn’t, and she said it was an adventure every day. I couldn’t believe how fast these people got drinks up to their mouths after walking in. Everyone went straight from the front door to the liquor. Robert immediately started to cook, and everyone except Mya, who had a wedding, trickled in. They greeted each other like they hadn’t seen one another in years, and got dressed for dinner. Kyle said he was trying to get blond hair Enrique Iglesias vibes – whatever that is – and Amanda told him not to be the weird old man in the club –  I get what that is. Paige asked how lunch with Lindsay was, and Amanda said, Lindsay had been emotionally hurt by things she’d said and done, so she apologized, and they came to terms. She thought they could be friends, but would never have the relationship Lindsay had with Danielle. Someone needs to tell them that friendships are not this complicated, and don’t need to all be the same.

They toasted to Tulum, and Robert brought out an amazing spread of food. Paige asked those coupled up what was the one thing they didn’t anticipate when moving in together. Robert said, the amount of stuff Danielle had, and Danielle said, Robert had a minimalist vibe. Paige said she’d throw away her birth certificate if she thought it was cluttering up the place, but Craig loved a tchotchke. They’d talked about moving in, but she wasn’t ready. Paige asked what was their partners most annoying habit, and Amanda said, breathing. Kyle said, if Amanda had her way, he wouldn’t chew any food, which made me wonder how the hell he chews. There were more boring questions with equally boring answers, and Gabby asked when the couples thought it was an appropriate time to invest together, but everyone was like, we pay bills with our money. Gabby told Danielle that she wasn’t sure where she stood with Ciara, but Danielle said she was the worst person to talk to about this. She’d wanted to be Ciara’s friend, but they never got there. In Gabby’s interview, she said she was struggling to connect with Ciara, but there was underlying tension, and she couldn’t figure out what the issue was. She was intuitive and could understand something was off, but she wasn’t sure if Ciara didn’t like her or just didn’t understand her. Danielle said Ciara was a tough nut to crack (but what about Karma Brown?), and Gabby said she felt secure with everyone else.

The housemates headed to a club, and Chris waved a light around like it was the 90s, while Carl and Lindsay made out. Since all parties must end, they were home around 12:30. Kyle asked if anybody was cool anymore, and a bunch of the guys, including Robert, danced around in the kitchen. Danielle repeatedly texted, come to bed, and around 3 he finally did. Kyle wandered around and babbled for a while. Robert woke up at 9, jumping straight to searching for his phone, since he was late. In Danielle’s interview, she said she was happy Robert came, but not happy they spent all of 10 minutes together. That was her reality. They didn’t give you a pamphlet on how to date a chef. Amanda said they had a packed day, and in a moment of clarity, Paige said she was too old for this. Kyle was glad there was another dude in the house, since they’d been outnumbered, and he and Carl thought Chris should have a proper initiation. The housemates got dressed, and a party bus picked them up. Danielle told everyone that Robert had left. He was supposed to leave at 7, but didn’t get out until 9:30.  

The bus took everyone to a winery, where they were to be given the wine maker blending experience, where they would make their own blend at the end. Carl ordered an Arnold Palmer, and there was the usual bunch of sex talk about things I don’t want to know. Sam grossed out Kyle, and in Sam’s interview, she said she had a big personality, and wasn’t for everyone, but if Kyle was shook by her, she was here for it. Chris flirted with Ciara, who Danielle thought she suddenly needed to rescue. Chris moved along, and Ciara said she thought he was trying to suss out her personality. She’s an observer at first, and people can’t read her. Danielle said, sometimes when Gabby was talking, Ciara was rolling her eyes, and Ciara said, it was circus level. She wanted to know why people were the way they were, and Gabby was hard to tap into. It was difficult for Ciara to have an artificial friendship or even fake it. Danielle thought they both had going on than what meets the eye, and told Ciara to give it a shot. In Ciara’s interview, she said she was more guarded than the average person, and was working on it in therapy. Trust was a big thing for her; she liked to figure out how people were first. You couldn’t force things; they had to come naturally. Kyle said something about dresses making him horny all the time, and reminded me that he’s the most awful in the house.

There was a separate boys and girls night, and the girls got dressed up, and went out. At the restaurant, Lindsay said she tried not to drink in front of Carly, and she wanted to f***ing go. Not meaning leave, but like, go crazy drinking. The guys stayed home, and Carl told Chris to have a seat, and brought out a paddle. In Chris’s interview, he said he wasn’t nervous. He was happy Carl and Kyle had kissed and made up. Whatever they wanted to do, as long as they weren’t fighting, he was game. They had Chris assume the position, holding fake flowers in his teeth, but Carl stopped short of paddling him. Paige said it was the first time the girls had Lindsay alone, and Lindsay said she tried to be respectful around Carl, but she wanted to be balls to the wall. If she went out with a girlfriend, it was just to dinner. Paige asked how Carl would feel if Lindsay came home drunk, but we never got the answer to this, since Ciara said she felt like Lindsay wanted to go to Montauk (ugh. there it is again), and we flashed back that, and all of them saying go to Montauk ten thousand times. Ciara asked if Lindsay wanted him to go or did she want to go without him, and Lindsay said she had no reason to want to go without him. Danielle said she took offense to that, and would love to steal Lindsay to go out, but she knows it’s not a possibility. It wasn’t that she minded Carl, but she thought Lindsay was curbing her drinking or the intensity because of him. Lindsay asked if that wasn’t a good thing, and Danielle said she liked Lindsay the way she was. Congratulations. Danielle just entered the awful people category. WTF? Sam said, her last boyfriend had been sober for ten years, and she slowed her roll. Lindsay said she wanted to get f***ed up with the girls, and now they were talking about it. Paige insisted it was just normal conversation, and Lindsay was getting mad. Lindsay said, Danielle was hard on her, and Danielle said, if your best friend’s not hard on you, they shouldn’t be your best friend. While I agree, I don’t think that includes encouraging you to drink to blackout.

Next time, Lindsay asks why Danielle is questioning her; Danielle talks to Robert about their living situation; and Kyle turns 40.  

Tonight’s Watch What Happens Live was Ce-lee-brate Good Times! a beautiful tribute to Captain Lee Rosbach’s ten years on Below Deck. There were tons of questions, clips, guests who had worked with the captain, been guests on the yacht, or friends IRL. Queen of Versailles, Jackie Siegel, who’d been a yacht guest, also did a bartending stint. The captain’s wife Maryann was in the audience, and least awful on Summer House, Carl, joined Captain Lee. He explained the captain had reached out when Carl lost his brother to addiction; Captain Lee having lost his son to the same illness. Carl said that the captain had inspired him to be a better man, and I can see why. The secret word was captain, and they said it 34 times, so if you were playing, you’d be pretty drunk since it’s a half-hour show.

🌈 Tasting the Rainbow…

Take a break here tomorrow for some soap and those horrifying women from New Jersey. Until then, stay safe, stay helping bridge the gap between friends, and stay wanting to be better for yourself. Looking for validation on the outside will only lead you back to your old patterns. Or worse still, down the wrong path altogether.