What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Violet runs into Charlie’s with a baseball, and tells Anna that her daddy gave it to her. Did she see him play? Anna says she did, and he’s a true hero. Violet asks if they can have a tea party, since Anna has pretty cups, and Anna says, any time she wants, but it might be a little different; Daddy won’t be there. She says she misses Violet, and Violet says she misses Anna too.

At Charlie’s, Michael says, Sam’s final play won the game. Good for her. Dante says it was all his coaching, but Sam says she made the play despite his coaching. Violet tells everyone, shh! Uncle Chase and Aunt Willow are coming. Finn picks her up, and Willow wheels Chase in. Everyone yells, surprise! and Violet confirms, it’s a surprise, in case that was unclear. Everyone applauds, and there are smiles all around.  

On the terrace with Bailey/Louise, Valentin tells her, happy 4^th of July. This is a family celebration where the firework’s are literal, so she might want to enjoy the quiet while it lasts. Brook comes out, and says she’s already late for Chase’s party, and wants to be there to support him. Valentin is good, right? He’s going to be Bailey’s primary caregiver for a couple hours. Monica comes out, and asks to see Brook for a moment – alone.   

Jake asks why Cameron brought him to the park. He wants to go to the pool with Aiden and their friends. Cameron says he thinks they need to talk, and Jake asks, about what? Cameron says, give him a break. He’s trying. He knows Jake is still mad and still hurt about what he did, and what he said to him when he was so sure Jason killed Franco. Jake says Cameron called his dad a killer, and said he was stupid for believing Jason. Cameron said he was sorry, and he said it was okay. Cameron says, obviously, it’s not okay, and he wants to fix it.   

Clothes are all over the floor in Britt’s room. Jax wakes up and looks at Britt. She opens her eyes, and he waves and tells her, good morning. She says, what the… and he says, it’s just him. Does she remember Charlie’s Pub last night? They had a few drinks, and she invited him back to her place. She says, things happened, and asks, what time is it? He checks, and says, no way; it’s the afternoon. She says, wow, time flies, and asks if he has anywhere to be. He says, actually, he doesn’t, unless she wants him to go, of course (🍷). She says, you tell me, and asks if it was pity sex. He says, no, not on his part. She’s beautiful. She says, good answer, and kisses him, because no one has bad breath or messed up makeup after a night of drinking and wild sex on a soap.

Carly asks if Josslyn is going to the park to watch the fireworks. Avery is going to a Lila’s Kids event, and she thinks Avery would feel better if Josslyn was close by, just in case she gets insecure. There’s been a lot of upheaval in Avery’s life recently. Josslyn says she was going to meet Cameron and Trina at the docks, but she’ll switch it to the park. Speaking of Trina, Carly will never believe what happened at Trina’s party. Actually before the party. Trina came face-to-face with Ava’s stalker.

On the phone, Trina says she told Portia that she’s over what happened last night. She’s not scared… She’s at the pool. She sees Spencer (another one who now goes by two names), and says she just spotted someone she knows.

Jason comes in, and Carly says, good; he’s here. Josslyn asks what Jason is doing for the 4^th, and he says he thinks he’s going to spend it with her mom. Josslyn asks if they’re going somewhere, and Carly says, they’re not sure yet, but they have something to tell her. She and Jason are getting married.

Brook says she’s used to the third degree from Olivia, but what did she do to provoke Monica? Monica says she just wanted to talk without Valentin, and Brook says, okay. What’s the problem? Monica says she heard Maxie was there to see Bailey again, and Britt says, so? Monica says, it can’t be healthy. It breaks her heart knowing what Maxie is going through. Her baby is with a kidnapper, and coming to see Bailey is going to open the wound over and over again. It’s not healthy. Maxie comes in, and says, happy 4^th! Look at that sweet, precious little girl. How cute she is in her 4^th of July outfit? She looks adorable. And she does. Bailey/Louise is a very cute baby.

Violet tells Chase and Willow, happy 4^th of July. Chase thanks her, and says she’s dressed for the celebration, but what is all this? Jordan says, they missed him, and thought it was a good time to celebrate, and tell him that they can’t wait to have him back. Dante can’t believe he’s saying this, but they missed Chase on the field too. He struck out a lot, but sometimes Chase actually hit the ball. Finn tells him to take his time in rehab. The longer they can avoid his pitching, the better. Violet says, just so everyone knows, today is only a party, not the reception. That’s later. Finn says, right. Chase wanted to make it clear that they’re saving the reception for when he’s is back on his feet. Chase says, which will be before they know it. He’s starting physical therapy. Willow convinced him to come there for a bite before visiting his physical therapist, and he totally believed her. Jordan says she told Chase’s new wife to lie, and Chase says, that’s a first. Dante says they have a little something for Chase and his new bride, and holds up Bride and Groom baseball shirts. He says he can’t wait for Chase to be back, so he can strike out again. Jordan suggests Chase and Willow both cheer them on this Thursday when they’re playing Aurora, and Violet says, yay, Uncle Chase and Aunt Willow! Everyone goes, yay!

Spencer says he’d ask if Trina is stalking him, if he wasn’t happy to see her. She says he wishes she was stalking him, and he asks if she hasn’t been on every pier looking for him. She says she was staking out a place to watch the fireworks with her friends, but she just got a text; they’re going to the park instead. He asks how the rest of her party was, and she says, awesome. Thanks for talking her into staying. He says, most people would have called it a night, but Trina tells him, she got some good advice about staying. He asks if she wants to catch some rays with him before meeting her friends, but she says she doesn’t have a swimsuit. He tells her, wear her birthday suit. He will if she will. She says she has a better idea. Why doesn’t she take him to the park… wearing clothes.

Cameron tells Jake that he’s sincerely sorry for insisting Jason killed Franco; he apologizes. Jake says, okay, but why did he? Cameron knows his dad would never hurt him like that. Cameron says he sees that now, but he was so hurt about losing Franco. Somebody told him recently that being angry is easy, but it’s so much harder to be sad, to be hurt. He took the easy way out. He was a jerk to Jason and a lousy big brother to Jake. He’s so sorry, and he’ll continue saying it until Jake believes him.

Josslyn says, Carly and Jason are getting married? That’s… unexpected. Carly says she knows it’s a surprise, but they thought about it carefully, and believe it’s the best choice for them. Josslyn says she only ever thought of them as friends, and Jason says, they are, and definitely couldn’t do this if weren’t best friends. They’ve always counted on each other, and been there for each other, and realized they should make the bond formal and legal by getting married. Josslyn asks if they think they’ll be happy, and Carly says, of course (🍷). What would make them really happy is knowing their family supports them. Josslyn says, of course (🍷) they have her support.

Jake says, Franco was his stepdad too, and he loved Franco. He didn’t deserve to be murdered. Maybe Cameron is right. Being mad at him is a whole lot easier than being sad. Cameron sits next to Jake on a bench, and says, he gets it. As soon as Jake stops being mad at Cameron, he’ll have time to miss Franco. Jake says he does miss Franco, but he also misses his brother. Playing video games with him, playing soccer, and teasing him about girls. Jake starts to cry, and Cameron says he misses those things too and knows it can be really scary to feel sad. How about if they do it together? Cameron puts his arm around Jake, and Jake says, okay.  

Josslyn tells Jason, welcome to the family. Except, he’s always been a part of the family. He says he’ll take the welcome anyway, and Josslyn asks if they don’t feel weird about being friends, then husband and wife. Carly says she thinks there’s going to be an adjustment, but they’re good. Josslyn says, clearly, they have it figured out, and the more she thinks about it, the more it makes sense. Who else are they going to marry? Sonny understood their relationship, but she’s not sure other people would. Relationships can be totally awkward, and they’re better off sticking to what they know. Carly says she doesn’t know whether to be proud that Josslyn is happy for them, or concerned that she’s such a cynic when it comes to relationships. She hasn’t even gone to college yet. Josslyn says she’s not a cynic. She just realizes that relationships can get complicated when you don’t want them too, but they’re so lucky. They already know  each other, inside and out. She has to get going, and Carly tells her to have fun. She says she will, and congratulates them, adding that she means it. She looks at Jason and says she doesn’t have to call him dad, right? Carly laughs, and Jason says, no. She says she was just making sure. Bye, engaged people. Happy 4^th. She leaves, and Carly says, that was weird, but it went kind of well. Are they ready for the next step? Jason looks uncomfortable, and says, there’s something they have to do first.

Jax tells Britt, not that they need any more fireworks, but today is the 4^th of July. She says, is it? and he says, picnics, fireworks, barbecues, the red, white, and blue. She laughs, and he asks, what’s funny? She says she was thinking about her first 4^th of July in Port Charles; it was a nightmare. She can laugh now, but back then, it was terrible. He asks, what happened? and she says, for starters, she was carrying a baby that wasn’t hers, but that’s not even the main part of the story. Patrick Drake’s daughter Emma had this hyper-realistic doll, and she was holding it. It just started peeing on her, and it caught her so off-guard, she chucked the evil doll off her lap, and it landed on the barbecue grill, and exploded into flames. Every part of that story is true. They laugh.

Chase thanks Finn and Elizabeth for pulling off the surprise party. Being with friends and family is the best medicine. Finn says they hoped he’d feel that way, and Elizabeth says she wants to check on Cameron, and make sure he got his brothers to the park. She leaves, and Chase says, Finn and Elizabeth always seem to be together. What’s going on with them?

Jordan tells Anna, it’s been a while since they had a proper catch-up. She knows Anna has been looking for Maxie’s baby. Anna says she’s been searching for any evidence with Valentin, and Jordan says, Anna and Valentin? Wait a minute.

Valentin texts Anna: Are you still coming?

Britt asks what Maxie is doing there again, and Maxie says she was passing by, and wondered what they were up to with baby’s first 4^th of July. Monica asks, what about James and Georgie? and Maxie says, they’re on a picnic with her mom and Mac. She’s going to join them later. She just wanted to see what was up with Brook and Bailey. Brook says, Valentin is a doting father, and every time Olivia comes by, she swoops in for her Bailey time. The Qs have a ton of nannies, so she thinks she’s covered. Monica says she’s going to going leave them to talk, and when she’s gone, Maxie asks why Monica is being weird. Brook says, she’s being weird because of Maxie.   

Finn tells Chase, Elizabeth is Violet’s aunt, and she’s been a good friend. When Chase got sick, she kept him from falling apart. Chase says, so there is something there, but Finn says, she’s still mourning the loss of her husband, and he still has issues because of Anna. Willow comes back, and Finn says, it’s really nice what she and Chase have, a good old fashioned, uncomplicated relationship. Chase says he couldn’t agree more, and Willow says she’ll go get them something to drink. Anna comes by, and asks if she can have Finn’s brother for a second. Finn says, of course (🍷), and gets up, saying, he kept the seat warm. She says, thanks, and sits. She says she wants to congratulate Chase on the wedding, and he says, thanks; he’s never been happier. She says, he deserves it.

Elizabeth tells Finn, Chase is right. Friends and family are really the best medicine. Finn says he’s almost happy himself. Then he remembers Peter is still in the freezer. She says she needs a drink. Does he want anything? He says, a drink sounds good, but no thank you.

Trina says Victor/Spencer will like her friends. They’re all going to college together in the fall. It was a whole drama. One was going to a California school, the other got waitlisted for Southern Coastal, but in the end, they all decided to go to PCU, which shows excellent taste, since she’s going too. Come on. She’ll introduce him to Cameron and Josslyn.

Josslyn sees Cameron and Jake, and asks if Jake is joining them, but he says, no way. He doesn’t want to be a third wheel. He’s meeting Aiden at the pool. He leaves, and Cameron says he doesn’t know where Jake got the third wheel idea. She says, it’s no big deal. Besides, she has exciting news. She’s glad he did his apology tour and all is forgiven, because her mom and Jason are getting married.

Jason tells Carly that he doesn’t want to lie, but something so simple like telling people they’re getting married, is… They both say, it’s complicated, together. He says, but what he told Josslyn was true. He couldn’t do this if Carly wasn’t his best friend. She says she feels the same way, and he takes a ring box out of his pocket. He tells her that he got her this.

Brook says, Monica has a point; Maxie shouldn’t be there, and she doesn’t need to be. Brook maneuvered her way into a job at Maxie’s office so she could see her daughter at daycare without anyone suspecting. Isn’t that enough? Maxie says, it was an ingenious plan, and she’s grateful, but it’s a holiday weekend and she’s here. Let her spend time with her daughter.

Valentin flashes back to being with Anna in Austin’s cabin, and Anna saying she couldn’t have gotten through the last few months without him. He tells her, nor him without her. He sort of smiles.

Willow asks how Michael’s 4^th of July is going, and he says he thinks he’s looking at the calm before the storm. She says, it sounds ominous, but he says, it’s good news. He was shocked when he first heard, but then he thought about it and it made perfect sense. He’s happy for them. She says, who? and he says, his mom and Jason are getting married. Elizabeth and Sam are sitting at the bar, and overhear. Willow asks if she heard that right; his mom and Jason? He says, after them being best friends his whole life, they decided to get married. They had a discussion about it, and he believes they know exactly what they’re doing, and they’re fully committed. Sam drains her drink, and jets. Elizabeth follows her.  

Carly looks at the ring, and says, it’s beautiful. She hands it to him, he sighs, and puts it on her finger. Bleh.   

Jax says, Britt barbecued a doll in front of the girl who owned it. That’s horrible. She says, it’s funny now, but back then, it was a nightmare. Jax suggests they make some better 4^th of July memories. Would she care to join him on the terrace deck to watch the fireworks?

On the phone, Carly thanks Olivia for letting her know, and Jason asks what Olivia wanted. She says, Vincent Novak is at the MetroCourt, and he says, maybe they want to make peace. She asks if he really thinks so, and he says, Brick’s team is efficient. The Novaks lost a lot; they lost their offices, and they lost trucks. She says, in that case, it looks like they watch the fireworks from the MetroCourt, and holds up her hand with the ring.

Trina asks if Victor/Spencer is coming, but he says maybe he’s not ready to meet her friends. She says, all of a sudden he’s shy? and he says, just thirsty. He’s going to grab some bottled waters, and he’ll catch up with her.

Cameron says, so Josslyn’s mom is marrying Jason. Is she excited about that? She says, yeah. They’ve been friends for, like, ever. Like she told them, who else would they marry? He says they have to talk about her and him, the graduation party, and how she kissed him. Trina joins them, and says they’ll never believe it. She ran into that guy again, Victor, the one who convinced her to go back to the party after she was drenched in fake blood. Josslyn says, he must be some guy, and Trina says, he’s cute. Not that she’d ever tell him that. She moves on, and Josslyn tells Cameron, she guesses their talk will have to wait.

Anna asks why she’s meeting Valentin on the Quartermaine terrace, and he says, it’s 4^th of July, and she’s British. She doesn’t have to be bitter and alone. She says he’s funny, and asks if his lovely little daughter is around. He says, she’s inside with her mother, which is good because she’s a little young for what he has in mind. She says, which is? and he says, Anna likes plenty of fire, right? She says, always, and he says, he has sparklers. He shows them to her.

Maxie says she’s missed Louise, and Brook says, Peter is still out there. What if he’s following her, watching her going to her non-friend’s house? He’s psycho, but not stupid. He’s going to put two and two together. Maxie says, she knows that, and after today, she’ll stay away. Brook asks, isn’t she the one who said she’d protect her baby at all costs? She can’t even keep her distance on a long weekend. What happened to her? Maxie says, Louise is her daughter; her flesh and blood. She knows better, but she can’t help herself.

At the pier, Sam says Elizabeth doesn’t have to babysit her, but Elizabeth says, babysitters don’t bring vodka, and takes out a bottle. Sam says, they both heard Michael say it; Jason is marrying Carly. If Elizabeth is afraid of leaving her alone, she can call one of Sam’s sisters. Elizabeth asks if she’s not the perfect person to vent to. She loved Jason too, and knows what it’s like to come in second place to Carly. Sam says, they didn’t even try to hide it. Carly always came first; she wouldn’t have it any other way. Elizabeth suggests they start with the shots, and pours them into plastic cups. She says, so Jason and Carly are getting married. She guesses it was inevitable, but doesn’t Sam think it’s a little soon? Sam says she doesn’t know. For as long as she and Jason were together, there was always Carly. There was Sonny too. Jason being Sonny’s best friend, business partner, and right hand man. Then Carly just took him, all for herself. Elizabeth says, that’s why doing shots won’t be enough, and Sam asks what she’s talking about.

Josslyn asks where Trina’s new friend is, and Trina says, he should have been there by now. Maybe he decided not to come, and Cameron says, if he’s already playing games, Trina might want to drop him, but she says, he’s just being a guy. If he comes, tell him that she couldn’t wait. Josslyn says, she’s leaving? and Trina says, it’s good not to be too available, besides, her mom keeps texting her. She’s still nervous about last night, so Trina is going to watch the fireworks with her. She says she’ll see them later, and leaves. Cameron says that gives them time to figure out what happened, but Josslyn asks, what is there to figure out? Dev forged her journal entry, and she never wrote that he was a bad kisser, because that’s not what she thinks. He says, there’s a lot more to it than just that.

Sam lugs a tote bag onto the pier, and asks Elizabeth, what now? Elizabeth says, now, they have another drink, and hands Sam a cup. Sam says, excellent, and they clink plastic cups. They drink another shot, and Sam asks what they’re doing. Elizabeth says, back in Colorado, her closest friend Terry, Dr. Randal, didn’t really date, but was the best shoulder to cry on. Whenever a crush moved on to someone else, Terry had this idea that you couldn’t really move on until you cleansed the person from your system. Elizabeth lights a rolled up newspaper, and throws it in a trash can, starting a fire. She asks Sam, what’s in the bag? and Sam takes out her leather jacket, saying, Jason gave it to her years ago. She reaches into a pocket, and takes out two concert tickets. She says, Springsteen tickets. They never used them. Elizabeth says, into the fire, and Sam tosses them in. Elizabeth says, now the jacket, but Sam says, no. Elizabeth says, yes, and Sam kisses it, and throws it in. Elizabeth asks, what else? and Sam pulls out a wooden box. She says, dominos. Don’t ask her why she and Jason loved the game. She doesn’t know, but they did. She adds it to the fire, but says, it’s not burning. Who knew dominos wouldn’t burn? She thinks she has something that will help, and takes a bottle of tequila out of the bag. She takes a drink, and throws the bottle in. She says, it was a memory, but not anymore.

Dante tells Finn that he’s going to find Sam and Elizabeth. He leaves Charlie’s, and Finn picks up Violet. She says, Uncle Chase and Aunt Willow want to take her to see the fireworks. Chase says, GH is letting the patients and the staff watch from the roof, and Willow says they promise to get Violet home afterward. Violet asks if she can go, and Finn says, two hours tops. He tells Chase, don’t over-do it, and Willow says she’ll make sure of that. Finn thanks her for everything, and tells Violet to stay with Uncle Chase. Dante comes back, and says he can’t find them anywhere. His phone rings, and he says, are they? He’ll be right there. That was a friend from the fire department. Apparently, Sam and Elizabeth are on the pier. Finn says, let’s go, and they leave.

Valentin hands Anna a sparkler, and says he got these for Charlotte, but she decided to go horseback riding. Apparently, her tastes are more sophisticated than run of the mill sparklers. Anna wonders where Charlotte got her extravagant taste from, and he says, guilty as charged. She says she happens to like sparklers. Light her up. He lights one for her and one for him.

Carly and Jason are in the MetroCourt elevator, and Jason asks if she’s ready. She says, let’s do it, and takes his hand. They walk in, and Vincent Novak gets up. He says he heard about the unfortunate misunderstanding with his nephew, and Jason says he’s surprised Joey didn’t know any better. Vincent says, he can be a hothead. He’s spoken to Joey, and hopes their families can continue to co-exist in peace. Jason says, that’s their goal too. If he and Carly had known Vincent was going to be there, they would have invited him to celebrate with them. Vincent says, celebrate what? and Carly says, Jason asked her to marry him, and she said yes. She shows him the ring.

In the park on the phone, Trina says she’s on her way home… No, she wants to be with Portia. They can look at the pictures from her party. She leaves, and Spencer comes out from the trees.  

Josslyn tells Cameron, Dev did a messed up thing. What else is there to say? He says, but if Dev hadn’t made him think Josslyn wasn’t into him, what would have happened? Would they have been together after they kissed at the dance? Would they be together now?

Maxie tells Brook, just a few more minutes, and she’ll leave. Britt says she knows Chase’s party is breaking up by now. She has to change, and she’ll give Maxie one or two minutes alone with Louise/Bailey. She’ll be upstairs, so hopefully, it won’t look too suspicious. Maxie thanks Brook, and Brook leaves. Maxie tells Louise that she’s missed her so much. She has no idea. Or maybe she does. Maxie loves her with all her heart. Monica walks in, and does not look thrilled.   

Anna says, ow! and drops her sparkler. Valentin asks if she’s all right, and she says, it’s just a spark flew. He says, let him see, and he takes her hand. He says, it’s just a little burn, and kisses it. Then he kisses her. I’m in. it’s about damn time.

Chase thanks everyone for coming. The next time the party is going to be… Violet says, a wedding reception, and he says, that’s right. A big old fancy wedding reception. He and Willow will do a first dance and everything. Violet says she can’t wait, and Michael and Willow look at each other.  

A fireman sprays the trashcan with a fire extinguisher, and Dante says he’s from the PCPD. He shows the fireman his badge, and says they got a call that there were two women out there. The fireman says, right through that door with his partner, and Sam and Elizabeth come out with another fireman. Dante says, they’ve got this, and thanks the firemen. Dante asks if Sam and Elizabeth are okay, and Elizabeth says, they’re fine. The fire’s out. She and Sam sit, and Dante asks if they started the fire. Sam says, come on. Join them in the celebration. It’s the 4^th of July. She takes a slug from the vodka bottle, and says, she just declared her independence.

Jax and Britt get in the elevator at the MetroCourt, and he tells her that she looks beautiful. She says he cleans up pretty nicely himself, and he says he’ll make sure there are no grills around, and the only doll on fire is her. She says, cornball, and he says, wait until he starts with the dad jokes. She tells him that she didn’t say corny was bad.

Carly says, sorry Jason has to stick around. She’s sure he’d much rather be at the bridge. He says, wouldn’t she? and she says, the view of the fireworks is much better from there. She used resent the bridge. She hated it because it was a Robin thing. It felt hands off to her. He says he took her there himself, but she says, it’s a girl thing. They should go back to the bridge. He says, okay; whatever she wants. Britt and Jax come in, and Britt and Jason lock eyes.

Tomorrow, Jason tells Britt that she still means something to him, Nina has something to tell Obrecht, Monica says they have a big problem, and Phyllis encourages Sonny to visit Nina.

The Haves and The Have Nots

Benny knocks on Rianna’s door, and she opens it. He asks if he can come in, and she says she shouldn’t do this. He says he drove all this way for her, and she lets him in. She says he wasn’t followed, was he? and he asks if she’s scared of that dude. She says he won’t leave her alone. She’d move away, but her mom is in a home there, and needs her. He asks, why? and she says her mom has had cerebral palsy her whole life. It got to be too much. He says, sorry, and she says, it’s okay. She can afford it most times. He says, most times? and she wonders why she’s telling him this… She’s drunk. He asks if he can have some, and she says she’ll get him a glass. She comes back with red wine, and he thanks her. She asks if he’s excited about his new house, and he says, come here. He tells her that she needs to be held, but she says she’s fine. He says, come on, and she says she’s not sleeping with him. He says he won’t bite, and she sits next to him, putting her head on his shoulder. He says going to be okay. He promises she will. She asks how he’s so sure, and he says he has a sixth sense about these things. She thanks him for defending her, but he says he was only doing what any man would do. She says, no. He made her feel so safe. She wants to thank him. She kisses him, and he asks what she’s doing. She tells him, shut up, and kisses him again. He says he ain’t going to be responsible. He told her that he’s not letting her take advantage of his body. They kiss some more, and she pushes him back. He takes off his jacket, and she unbuckles his belt, then kisses down his chest, and… well, you know.

David asks the guard, who just left? and the guard says it was a guest of David’s son. He said his name was Tanner. David tells him to run the plates, but he says he already did. The guy’s full name is Leonard Tanner Lewis. David asks how he knows Jeffrey, but the guard doesn’t know. David tells him to find out all he can. Jeffrey comes downstairs, and says David doesn’t have to do that. David asks Jeffrey to tell him who nobody is, and Jeffrey says, he’s Justin’s brother. David says, the boy who set himself on fire? What did he want? Jeffrey says Tanner wanted him to come to the funeral. David asks, why? and Jeffrey says, Tanner told him that Justin cared for him. David asks if Jeffrey plans on attending, but Jeffrey says, no. David says, good. He doesn’t think it would be appropriate, and Jeffrey says, there’s something about Tanner that he doesn’t trust. David says, then he shouldn’t. You never know what people’s motives really are. David goes upstairs.

Jim pulls into David’s driveway, and the guard asks if he can help him. Jim says he’s going in to see David, and the guard asks if David knows him. Jim says he does, and asks if he isn’t the sorry-ass security guard Jim fired. He let Jim’s son escape. The guard asks if he can help Jim, but Jim says, no. He’s going in to see David. The guard says he has to be announced, but Jim says he doesn’t think so. The guard puts his hand against Jim’s chest, and says he’ll put Jim on the ground if he doesn’t wait. Jim tells the guard to take his hand off. He’d like to see the guard try. The guard tells him, move toward the door, and he will. Jim laughs, and says, okay, announce him.

The guard tells David that Jim is there to see him, and David says, okay. Jim comes in, and says he sees David hired the sorry-ass security company he fired. David says, they’re doing okay so far. What brings Jim there? Jim says he’s in a bind. He needs $100K. That crazy-ass bitch wife of David’s is representing Celine. Judge Modine will put his ass in jail if he doesn’t give Celine $50K in 24 hours. David says, Jim doesn’t have $50K? Jim says he doesn’t have 50 cents. These women… David says he knows, and Jim says, that damn Hanna. David wonders if she said no, but Jim says he’d rather shoot himself than ask Hanna for money. David says he’ll loan Jim the money, and Jim says he appreciates it. These damn women… David says, they’ve lost their minds. He’s surprised Jim is paying Celine, but Jim says he has no time to be in jail, and Modine is just the bastard who will send him there. David says, speaking of wild women, Mama Rose… Jim says he talked to her? but David says, no, she retired. Apparently, she has health problems and moved to Florida. Jim asks, when? and David says, a month ago. Jim says that means he can go after Candace, but David says, not necessarily. Vinnie is running things. Jim says, he’s vicious, and David says, he can be. Jim asks what David suggests, and David says, pay him. Jim says, for what? and David says, Candace. Have Vinnie get rid of her. Jim says, good idea. What does David think it would cost? David asks what it’s worth to get rid of her, and Jim says she took $8 million from him. David says, give Vinnie $100K, and Jim asks if David can make it $200K. David says Jim will probably need it, and Jim thanks him. David says he’ll have his lawyer write it up, but Jim says, no lawyers involved. He doesn’t trust lawyers. He was a lawyer. Some of his best friends are lawyers. He leaves, and David gets on the phone.

Hanna walks in the door to Kathryn’s house, when Kathryn calls. Hanna says she’s on her way out, but Kathryn says, on second thought, let Jim go over there. Hanna says, but Kathryn’s boyfriend… and Kathryn says, he’s not her boyfriend. He should be gone by now, and if he’s not, Jim can kick his ass out. Hanna says, the two of them are something, and asks what Kathryn wants her to do. Kathryn says, call Jim on a three-way. She knows Hanna doesn’t want to, and Hanna says Kathryn has no idea how much that man makes her blood boil. Hanna makes the call, and when Jim answers, Kathryn says, Wyatt is at the loft. Jim says, the one she was supposed to have sold? and Kathryn says, he’s there. Jim says, he’s in the hospital, but she tells him, go over there and see what’s going on. He asks how she knows this from jail, and she says, just go. He asks again, and she says she heard Wyatt on the phone. He asks why she was calling there. Who’s living there? She says, no one, and he asks if it’s that damn Hanna. What’s going on with them? Are they having a fling or something? She tells him, just go, but he says he’s not going until she tells him, and has her girlfriend release some money. She says, if he doesn’t go, and Wyatt harms himself, she’ll know it’s him. He says, bye, and she asks if he hung up. Hanna says, he did, and she asks Hanna to go over there. Hanna says, okay, and Kathryn thanks her, and says she’ll try to call in an hour. She’s sorry. Hanna says, it’s okay, and Kathryn says, Hanna has the power and the money.

There’s no afterglow for Rianna, who looks miserable. Benny asks why she’s crying, and she says, sorry. He says, for what? and she says she thinks he should go. She didn’t want to do this. Who knew she was this vulnerable? He says she needed to take her mind off it. How did he do? She says he’s so lame, and he apologizes. She tells him that his credit sucks, and he says, damn. Why is she bringing it up now? She says he needs to work on it, but he says she didn’t have him there for no credit. Is she nervous or something? She says, maybe a little. She shouldn’t have done that. She needs to ask… He says he’s healthy, and she asks if he’s sure. He says, is she? and she says she has nothing. He says, it’s good then, but she’s still nervous. Why don’t they have a snack? She says she can make him a sandwich, and he says, that’s it? She can’t cook? She says, can he? and he says, hell yeah. What’s she got? She suggests he put on clothes first, and he says, how about this? lifting the sheet. She says, it’s sexy, and tells him she’s going to get dressed, but he says if he’s cooking nekked, she is too. She asks him to tell her about himself. Is he a whore? How many women has he slept with? He says he’s not answering that. How many men has she slept with? She says, two, and he says she means he’s two? He laughs, and says, get out with that bullsh*t, but she promises it’s true. He asks how she hooked up with Sandy. She must know he hates Black people. Sandy told Benny straight up that he doesn’t like him. She says Sandy loves her too much. He’s going to come after Benny hard. He says he’ll handle it, and she says, how? He says he’d like a burger, but she says, it’s too late for a burger. (Who made up that rule?) He says, it’s what he wants, and he needs to get ready for round two. She says they’re not doing it again, and he wonders if it’s like she wasn’t doing it the first time. They already did it once, and if they do it twice in the same night, it don’t count. She says, he’s the worst, and he tells her, don’t look at his butt. He gets up, but he’s wearing underwear.

Rocky is at the loft, and says Kathryn wants Roderick out, but Roderick says he told Rocky, he’s not leaving. Rocky says he doesn’t want to do that. Go to his own place. Roderick says he doesn’t want to go to that dump; he’s staying there. He looked online, and he can claim squatter’s rights. (Um… isn’t he in the country illegally? Weren’t the Feds looking to question him?) He says Kathryn can’t kick him out. He can sue her for more than the place is worth. Rocky says he doesn’t want to do that. He sounds like a junkie, and he’s asking for big trouble. Roderick says, the hell with them, and asks Rocky to stay and have a drink, but Rocky says he’s not going to be there when they come knocking. Roderick says, no one is knocking, when there’s a knock at the door. Rocky says someone is knocking at the door, and he’s leaving though it. He walks out, and Hanna comes in. Roderick asks what she wants, and she says he’s not supposed to be there. He says he’s not leaving, and Jim walks in. Jim says he’s looking for Wyatt, and Roderick asks how Jim is. Jim wonders what the hell is going on, and Hanna says he was telling her that he’s not leaving. Jim asks, where’s Wyatt? and Hanna says she’s leaving, and goes. Roderick says he doesn’t know; Wyatt isn’t there. Jim asks what Roderick is doing there, and Roderick says he was just cleaning the place. Jim asks where his son is, and Roderick says he doesn’t know. Jim asks his name, and Roderick tells him. Jim says, if he’s there cleaning, what’s up with his luggage? Roderick stammers, and Jim mimics him, and says, get out. Roderick jets, and Jim looks at the drugs on the table, and says, dammit, Kathryn.

Candace answers the phone, what? and Landon asks if she’s seen the news. She says, what news? and he says, it’s on all the news stations and in the paper. He’s been sending her clips. She says she hasn’t watched them, and he says, because she has Jim’s money. She’s not going to touch it. She says she won’t. How does he know? He says he knows where she is right now. She needs to let him advise her on the money. She says, no, and he says, then they’ll take it. She says, who? and he says, the IRS. She has to put it in a business account, and shelter it. She says she already did; she’s two steps ahead of him. What does he want? He says he’s asking her to come to DC. She says, get the hell out, and he says, he just wants her to do one interview. The whole world will change its perception. She says, no, and he says, Charles (using the he/him thing) doesn’t do well without her. She says Charles should have thought of that before he kicked her out, and put her in the back of a car. He asks if they can’t let that go. They get it. Their people screwed up. What’s her plan? She says she’s going to call the guy who made Landon piss himself, and Landon says, he kind of liked Mitch afterward. He says he’ll call again, but she says, just listen. She’s not doing an interview, and she’s leaving the hotel. He says they’ll just find her in the next one. She says, okay, fine. She’ll go tell her side. He asks why she’s doing this; he’s trying to help. She says he’s helping Charles, and Landon says, and himself. She says she’s not going to be a pawn, and he says they’ve gone over this. She’s still a stupid hood chick. She says, say that again, and he says, it’s politics. He knows she’s enjoying this. Candace says she’s not enjoying it, but he says, tell that to someone who doesn’t know her. She’ll have them eating out of the palm of her hand. He tells her, at least change hotels; that one looks low rent. She says it was good enough for him to come by, and he says he’s done some of his best work in those places. She hangs up.    

Charles comes out, and Landon asks if he’s all packed, then answers his own question. Of course he is; they’re going to the White House. It’s exciting. It’s amazing to think how far they’ve come. Charles says he almost can’t believe it, when Conley joins them. He says he came to see Charles off, and asks if Landon can give them a moment. Landon leaves, and Conley asks if Charles is good.

Landon goes back to his office, and Oliver asks if Conley is there. Landon says, he’s been here a lot… Okay, what? Oliver says, nothing, and Landon asks if Oliver knows what he hates about him. Oliver says, everything? and Landon says, his smug attitude. Little bitch. He was thisclose to firing Oliver. Oliver says, sorry, and Landon says, the only reason he’s keeping Oliver is that he has potential. When he becomes a detriment, he’s going. Now what the hell did Oliver want to tell him about Conley? Oliver says, Conley’s got an angle, and Landon says, he knows. Oliver asks, what is it? but Landon says, that, he doesn’t know. He tells Oliver not to come back unless he has actual information. Landon does know Conley’s angle, but don’t come back unless Oliver has proof. Oliver asks what it is, but Landon says he’s not going to tell him.

Conley tells Charles that he’s headed for the White House. He’s so proud. Charles thanks him, and asks if Conley is okay. Conley says he did want to know if Charles spent any more time considering Devoir. It’s Charles’s decision, but did Charles look at his proposal? Charles says he didn’t, and Conley encourages him to look at Devoir’s resumé. He thinks Devoir would be great for the state of Virginia. Charles says he thought they already talked about this, but Conley says he wanted to make sure Devoir got a fair shake. Charles asks, what is it? Why is Conley pushing this guy so hard? Is there something else? Conley says, no, and Charles hopes Conley won’t mind if he asks him to stop pushing so hard. Conley asks if there’s anything he can help with, but Charles says, everything is done. Conley says, of course. Charles is the President of the United States. Everything is moved for him. Charles says, it’s obvious Conley has an agenda, and Conley says, how about them Mets? he’s heading home. They need him at the farm. he didn’t mean to push. He should know better. Charles tells him, it’s okay, and Conley leaves. Landon asks if Charles is all set, and Charles says he is. Landon says, sir… Charles says he knows when Landon addresses him like that, it’s something bad. Landon says, it’s not bad, but it’s about Devoir, and Conley’s request that he be made head of the EPA. Has Charles ever been to the farm? Charles says, a lot of times, and Landon says he looked at the pipeline being proposed. It’s going to run through protected land, and across Conley’s farm. He stands to make a lot of money. Landon thinks that’s why Conley is pushing so hard. Charles says he knew it had to be something, and Landon says he’s afraid so. Charles asks if Landon knows what it feels like to be used at every hand, and Landon says, sorry, but Charles says he bought it. He thinks he should be used to it, and Landon says, the higher you go… Charles says he didn’t expect it from Conley, and Landon says, onward? Charles says, onward. Landon says, going to the White House, Mr. President? and Charles says, yes, please. They shake hands, and Landon says, let’s do it. Landon’s phone rings, and Charles asks who it is. Landon says, Candace.

Charles says, let him answer, and Landon asks if he’s sure. Charles says, give him the phone, and says, hello? Candance says, Landon… but Charles says, no, it’s him. She asks how he is, and he says he should be asking her. She says she’s okay. She wanted to talk to Landon. Charles says she got him, but she says she’s not ready to talk to him. He says he’s not ready to talk to her either, and she asks why he’s on the phone. He says, the same reason she was calling. She says, why is that exactly? and he says she misses him like he misses her. She says, the last time he saw her, she was in the trunk of a car. He says he’s so sorry. He misses her, and would love to see her. She says she doesn’t think that’s going to happen. She’s not going to walk through that door, or sneak in and out. He says he doesn’t want her to, and she says he wants her to walk in the front door of the White House? He tells her, come to Pennsylvania Avenue, and she says he doesn’t mean a damn thing he’s saying, but he says he does. He’s President Elect. What the hell are they going to do to him? She says, it was a big deal before, but he says, not anymore. She’s a bigger deal. Come see him. She says she’ll think about it, and he says, they’ve got nothing but time. She says, at least seven months, and he says, what? She says she’s pregnant. She waits, and says, it’s quiet. He says, how many… and she says, it’s his. He’s the only man she had unprotected sex with. He tells her, okay, and she asks if that’s all he has to say. He says they should meet soon. Can he call when he gets to DC? She says, yeah, and he says, they’ll talk soon.

Charles hands the phone back to Landon, who says, may he ask what she said. Charles tells him, she said she’s pregnant. Landon says, from him? and Charles says, that’s what she said. Let’s go to DC. Not a word to anyone. Landon says, no, sir, and leaves. Charles wonders WTF to do.

The guard tells Jeffrey that Madison is there, and Jeffrey says, let him in. Madison walks in, and Jeffrey says he thought Madison was working. Madison says, they let him go home, and Jeffrey asks, why? Madison says he got piss thrown on him, and Jeffrey says, what? Sorry. Did he shower? Madison says, of course, and Jeffrey says he’s kidding. Madison says, and then he got choked out. Jeffrey says, by who? and Madison says, Wyatt Cryer. He escaped from the hospital in Madison’s scrubs, while Madison got left on the floor. Jeffrey asks where the hell Wyatt is, and Madison says, the police are looking everywhere for him. He stole powerful drugs that could kill him. Jeffrey thinks he should tell his dad, and runs upstairs. The door opens, and the guard tells Madison that a friend of Jeffrey’s is there. Madison asks, who? and the guard says, Wyatt Cryer.  

Madison says, the guard is security, right? Wyatt is a prisoner who escaped from the hospital. Bring him in, and detain him. The guard says, okay, and lets Wyatt in. Wyatt seems really jazzed, and asks where Jeffrey is. Madison says, upstairs, and asks if Wyatt is high. What did he take? Wyatt asks where Jeffrey is again, when Jeffrey comes downstairs, and says he’s calling the cops. Wyatt says he’s leaving, but the guard blocks him, and says he’s not leaving. Wyatt does a slow clap, and the guard says he’s not going anywhere. Wyatt tries throwing a punch, but the guard flips him to the ground, and gets Wyatt’s hands behind his back.

Candace is in bed when there’s a knock at the door. She asks who it is, and a male voice says, me. She asks who me is, and he says he’ll break the door down if she doesn’t let him in. She says, do that, and she’ll blow his brains out. He says, they both know she doesn’t have a gun, and she says, try it and find out. The door opens, and it’s Oscar. She says, what the hell? How is he there? He asks what she means. How she pushed him out of a window? She thought it would kill him. She says she knows she did, but he says, she thought she did. She says she saw him fall from the 30^th floor. He says, nothing she ever does will work. Don’t worry. He’s not going to kill her. She asks why he’s there, and he says, we’re all here. She asks, who’s we?, and he says they’re all here to destroy her.   

Is this going to be some kind of riff on A Christmas Carol?

Next time, Veronica says, she’s Veronica, bitch, you can’t kill her; Jim says he’s taking Wyatt’s ass to rehab or dragging it to jail; Kathryn gets a new cellmate; and David says Veronica’s end is coming.

🤹‍♀️ To Be Continued… Tune in tomorrow for soap and double the Housewives. Until then, stay safe, stay looking for the silver lining, and stay knowing that relationships can get complicated when you don’t want them to, but not being a cynic