Tag Archives: Below Deck Mediterranean

May 23, 2017 – The Ball Begins, Travis Menaces Kelly, the Anchor Tangles & a Phantom of the Paradise Flashback

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Mario Lopez is coming to us live from the red carpet, along with Nina.

Sam asks Jason what’s going on; he hasn’t been the same since the nightmare. He doesn’t get a chance to answer, since Jake arrives with Elizabeth and Franco. He pulls a billion silk scarves from his pocket.

Ava hauls out the giant check. Scotty says she’s just trying to assuage her guilt for what she did to Morgan.

Michael stops by Sonny’s house to drop off Morgan’s journal. He thinks it stinks that Sonny and Carly can’t even be in the same ballroom together.

Carly tells Bobbie about catching Sonny with Martina. Bobbie suggests stringing Sonny up by his cummerbund, but Carly says Sonny isn’t coming to the ball. A year ago, they had so much to look forward to, and now look.

Michael tries to talk Sonny into going to the ball, but it’s a no. He asks why Sonny wanted Morgan’s journal.

Valentin arrives with his date, Charlotte. Nina doesn’t bat an eye when Mario introduces him as her husband, and takes Charlotte to pose for the paparazzi. Valentin tells Nina she looks beautiful, and Charlotte says she misses her. Nina makes the excuse of having a lot of work. Charlotte says Lulu picked out her dress, and Nina suggests thanking her. Valentin asks what he can do to make things right, but Nina says there’s nothing. He should have put his family first. He says Anna will never come between them again, and begs Nina to come back. Anna arrives with Emma and Felicia.

Michael talks to Sonny about Morgan being fine last year. He wonders what happened, and thinks about it all the time. He asks what sent Morgan off the rails, but Sonny doesn’t know, and doesn’t know if he’ll ever find out.

Scotty tells Ava that’s a hefty amount, and Ava sys Lucy put the squeeze on her. Lucy floats by, and Scotty gives her flowers from him and Serena. Ava asks if they’re all set for tonight, and Lucy says everyone got the memo that her donation is in memory of Morgan.

Carly tells Bobbie that she feels sorry for Sonny. Bobbie does too – in this one isolated department. Carly says they’re trying to understand why, and Bobbie wishes she had the answer. She says there’s still life to be lived and people to be loved though. They hug. Josslyn walks in and joins them. Bobbie says, opening number, here she comes; and the three of them leave for the ball, arm in arm.

Nina ditches Valentin. She emphasizes that Anna is with her granddaughter. Emma gives a shout out to Robin, who’s at home with her feet up. Griff joins them. Charlotte talks to Emma, who suggests she can be a magician’s assistant too.

Jake goes in to put some finishing touches on his act. Jason seems troubled, or as Sam puts it, weird. He says it felt like more than a nightmare. Helena took everything he loved away from him, and he can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong.

Charlotte goes backstage with Emma. Griff asks Anna what’s up with her and Valentin, and why would she want anything else to do with him. She says because of this, and shows him the necklace.

Jason tells Sam there’s a lot he still doesn’t remember. He wonders why Helena would still be in his head.

Nina introduces Franco, Elizabeth and Jake. Franco says the Nurses Ball isn’t going to know what hit it. I’ll bet. Epiphany and Felix are next, followed by Amy 2.0. Nathan rescues her from answering questions. Mario asks where Maxie is, and Nathan says she’s working. The Queen of the Nurses Ball graces the red carpet – Lucy.

Scotty asks Ava if she’s flaunting her affair with Morgan. She says it’s a gesture, and he suggests it might offend Morgan’s parents with a public reminder of what happened. He tells her not to do it.

Sonny tells Michael he’s going to try and piece together what Morgan did, and why. Michael tells him good luck. Sonny sits down with the journal. After reading something, he picks up the phone and says he needs to see someone right away. It’s about Morgan.

Jason and Sam walk the carpet. They talk about Scout. Amy II thanks Nathan for saving her, and tells him sorry Maxie couldn’t make it. She talks about working a lot, and he asks if she has another job, but she gets whisked away before she can answer. Nina asks Nathan how she’s supposed to trust Valentin again.

Charlotte asks Jake if she can be in the magic show, and he says okay. Anna explains what a chimera is to Griff. She says it was also the name of a WSB project, and tells him about Alex. Griff asks why Anna is involved, and she says the Chimera is out there somewhere, waiting to be unleashed.

Michael joins Bobbie and Carly. He asks Bobbie about Nelle, and Josslyn is surprised that she’s in the hospital.

Andre arrives at Sonny’s house. Sonny points out the difference in the dosages that Morgan should have been taking and what’s on the bottle. Andre says he noticed, but wanted to be absolutely sure before opening old wounds. Sonny says he doesn’t want Carly to know anything until it’s concrete. Andre tells him that the pharmacy dispensed 600 mg to Morgan, and has no idea why the pills were 300 mg. Sonny asks if it would have made that radical of a difference, and Andre says the only way Morgan could have veered that far off course is if he wasn’t taking lithium at all.

Griff tells Anna to call Robert, but she doesn’t think he’d make any progress. He suggests she at least wait. Jason asks Elizabeth about Jake, and she says he’s back to his old self. Sam asks if Jason feels any better, but he says no.

Jake tells the girls that the magic set was a birthday gift from Spencer. Emma tells Jake that Spencer was saving the gift for when he saw him, and it’s not a magic set. Ruh-roh!

Jordan and Curtis are approached by a reporter whose name is Pinacchio, and I wonder if that’s supposed to be a joke. Curtis tells him that the ball is going to be full of surprises.

Ava tells Lucy she’s taking her advice and leaving Morgan out of the donation. Lucy says Scotty must have had something to do with it, and he says she can thank him later. Lucy says Ava is selfish, and she’s surprised he’s thrown in with her. He says she’s the one who blackmailed Ava. Lucy says that was for a good cause, and hopes Sonny skewers her, but she’s glad it’s not going to be tonight.

Bobbie tells Josslyn what happened to Nelle, and that Nelle’s kidney was bruised, but she should be fine. They go inside.

Sonny dumps the pills out of the bottle, and asks Andre if he’s sure. Andre says it’s the only explanation that makes any sense. Sonny says he trusts the journal 100% and Andre agrees. Sonny says Morgan wrote that he was taking the medication. He looks into the empty bottle and says, what’s that?

Carly and crew enter the carpet area. Nina asks about Sonny. Carly says he couldn’t make it, but wants everyone to know that the fight against HIV/AIDS is dear to his heart. Carly asks Bobbie about Nelle, but she says tonight is about fun.

Sonny says there’s powder, like a pill broke or crumbled. He tastes it, and says there’s something else in the vial. Andre takes it to have it tested.

Mario interviews total strangers. Sonny sits down to watch. Scotty and Ava are up next. Mario says that Sonny and Carly must be moved by the donation she made in memory of Morgan. Anna drops the necklace going in.

Lucy starts the show. She says it’s not about the glitz and glamour, or her ending up in her underwear, which is not going to happen this year. She gives a shout out to this year’s sponsor, Burt’s Bees, and tells us that the first Nurses Ball was 23 years ago. Lucy says that the key word is nurses, who are the heart and soul of the hospital. She suggests we see what they’re up to tonight, and the curtain opens. We see a screen with the opening number filmed in the hospital. I’m confused, especially when they end up on the stage, since the ball is supposed to be at the MetroCourt. Okay. Suspension of disbelief happening.

Jake tells the girls not to tell anyone and ruin the surprise. Sam tells Jason to stop focusing on his dream. He asks how she’s doing, and she’s good. She tells him to get himself a scotch. Lucy reminds everyone that they’re at the ball to make donations. Jake says the big finale is the most important part. He says it’s all about this, and shows them the Chimera martini shaker.

Anna wants to talk to Valentin. He tells her to talk to her sister. Anna says Alex can’t help, but he can. She asks him to put aside his justifiable anger, and do the right thing. Jason sees the necklace on the floor.

Michael tells Carly that she and Sonny aren’t as far apart as they think they are. He wants her to admit she misses him. Ava is annoyed about the reporter saying something about Morgan. She says it’s going to be all over everywhere. Scotty doesn’t think Sonny will be able to follow the breadcrumbs. Maybe. Maybe not. But he’s here.

Tomorrow, more Nurses Ball, Nelle asks for Michael, Anna wants to know where the Chimera is, Jake tells Emma not to touch it, and Andre checks on the pill bottle test.

If Loving You is Wrong

When we last left, Travis had flattened Kelly’s tire and hid in her car trunk. When she went looking for the spare, he popped out of the trunk and wrestled her to the ground.

Travis asks Kelly why she went to the cops. Like she can talk with his hand over her mouth. He says she doesn’t know him, and starts to choke her. Kelly whacks him with something and runs, but he tackles her. He tries to choke her again on someone’s front lawn. Where is everybody? She keeps trying to yell for someone to call 911. If nothing else, Travis is a bold one. Kelly tells him she’s sorry. She says she can’t breathe, and he says good, which isn’t a positive sign. She loses consciousness, and Travis asks if she’s dead. He feels for a pulse and says she is, but I have my doubts. Mostly because Travis is such an idiot, he probably doesn’t even know what a pulse is.

Travis laughs to himself. A woman with a gun appears, and says she’s calling the police. Travis claims Kelly has passed out, and tells her to call an ambulance. The woman says she saw him attacking her, but he insists he was helping. He pretends to do CPR, and Kelly comes to. He tells her, you’ve lived to see another day, bitch.

The amazing Lushion tells the kids to keep the noise down and let Natalie sleep; she’s exhausted after finding out about Joey. Pete calls to ask if there’s any word on Andrew. Lushion says if there is, he’ll let Pete know. He asks if Pete talked to the FBI. Pete says he gave a full statement, and they’re picking Eddie up after they move Pete. Lushion asks if Pete is worried. I would be. Pete says he just doesn’t know where his life is going. Lushion calls him a good kid, and says he has a great future ahead. Yeah, if Eddie doesn’t get to him first. Lushion says Pete is going to see him sooner than he thinks, and he’ll call later.

Esperanza wonders what’s taking Kelly so long. The kids go in the backyard to play on the swings. Lushion comes by. Esperanza wants to see the new house, and asks about Natalie. He says she’s asleep; it’s been a long day. Esperanza says not as long as it is for Kelly. She tells Lushion that his boy DION – finally, a name! – keeps saying it’s Kelly causing problems, when Travis is the one harassing her.

Lushion tells Esperanza that Andrew is missing, and he thinks Alex knows something about it. Esperanza asks if he thinks Alex’s parents had something to do with it, but he doesn’t know. He tells her to talk to Alex, but not let on that he’s the one who asked. He asks if Esperanza can also get the girls together to come over to cheer Natalie up. He tells her that Joey is in jail for violating probation; he’s in the prison hospital. Geez. If you think your life is bad, just watch an episode of this show.

Somehow, Kelly gets back home. Why isn’t she at the police station? What about the witness? Esperanza asks what happened to her. Kelly starts to cry, and tells her about Travis being in the trunk of her car. She asks where Justice is, and says she doesn’t want him to see her like this. Esperanza takes her inside. She takes pictures, and asks if Kelly called the police, but Kelly says they won’t believe her. Esperanza calls Lushion and asks him to come over. She gets Kelly some water, and I wonder what she charges for a full glass.

Lushion comes in, and Kelly explains what happened with Travis. He says Travis has gone way too far. Esperanza says none of the officers are doing anything. Lushion says he’s getting involved, but Kelly is afraid it will make Travis crazier. Lushion says he’s right next door, but Kelly is worried about what happens when he’s not there. Lushion says when he’s done with Travis, he won’t be bothering her again. He knows how to deal with these guys.

Lushion goes to the station. He asks Dion what he’s doing about Travis, and says he was in Kelly’s trunk. Dion shows him the texts, and Lushion says something isn’t right. Dion thinks that Kelly and Travis are both crazy and wasting his time. Lushion says that Kelly had marks from Travis choking her, and to just bring him in for questioning. Dion says that Travis is from a prominent family, and he doesn’t trust Kelly. Okay, he’s back on my jerkface list. Lushion calls for Steven, but Steven says there’s nothing he can do. Lushion is worried that Travis is going to kill Kelly, but Steven says sorry. He asks Lushion if he told Pete to talk to the FBI. Lushion says that he did, and Steven says he told him to wait. They haven’t gotten Escada yet. He says he’s getting enough heat from upstairs, and just slow down a little. Lushion says he wants Travis brought in. Steven says he can’t, and Lushion says then he will. He’ll make it federal. Steven says Eddie is already on to him, but our beloved Lushion is willing to take the chance. Steven says he’ll bring Travis in.

A-hole Eddie tells Lushion that word on the street is, he’s a baby daddy. He tells Eddie to get out of his face and get the real info. Eddie calls him a bitch, and says he can’t wait until Lushion’s world crumbles around him. Lushion says he has a bitch for Eddie all right.

Lushion goes back to Kelly’s house. He says Travis is nowhere to be found, but there’s a warrant out for his arrest. He tells her forget Dion and Rick, he went over their heads. He says if she needs anything, to call him. He reminds them about the get-together for Natalie.

Esperanza tells Kelly about cheering Natalie up, and asks if she can come. Kelly says it’s not like she has anything else going on. She says it’s hard going into that house and not thinking about Ramses, but Esperanza says maybe they’ve changed things around. Kelly says he was so sweet. She thinks Travis did something to him. He has everybody fooled, but Esperanza says not her and Lushion. She suggests Kelly spend the night at her place, but Kelly doesn’t want to be forced out of her own house. She says his ass better not come back. She says Lushion is also right next door. Esperanza doesn’t like it, but she has to go. Kelly locks the door behind her.

Alex sees a car outside. She goes out to find Brad sitting in the driveway. He says he didn’t know she was home, since there’s no car. She says she had a wreck, and asks if he wants to come in. When he doesn’t, she asks to join him, and gets in the passenger seat. He asks about the baby, and she says that he’s been put into foster care because of her parents. Brad says, sorry to hear that, and she tells him that Randal had a court hearing for custody. The judge almost granted it to him, so she threw a Hail Mary and said he wasn’t the father, but he is. She says all she did was postpone the inevitable. Alex asks why Brad is there, but he doesn’t know. He asks if that’s why Randal thinks the baby is Lushion’s, and tells her about Randal’s visit to his office. She calls Randal a bastard. She tells him that Lushion came over to borrow a candle, and Randal saw him. She talks about how nice it is to have them in the neighborhood, but that she has to straighten things out, and already spoke with Natalie. Brad says Eddie knows, and Alex says great, another excuse for him to hate her. Brad says he still loves her (Brad does, not Eddie), but he’s scared. He doesn’t think he could go through that again, and Alex says it will never happen again. Brad doesn’t think he could live with the baby, and Alex says she thought about that too. She says what if the roles were reversed, and wonders how she would feel.

Alex says that she wants to tell Brad congratulations, and he says for what. She says it’s okay; she knows, but he doesn’t understand what she’s talking about. She says she knows Marcie is pregnant. Brad says she’s not, but Alex says she is; they have the same doctor. She’s surprised that Marcie hasn’t told him. Brad says he has to go – not because of that, because of him. Creepy Randal’s face is at the car window. He says that they have a hearing tomorrow, and Alex should get her beauty rest. He asks if she still wants to meet in the shed, but maybe this isn’t a good time to ask. He says he’ll be in there warming it up, like the d-bag he is.

Brad says he takes it back. Alex tries to explain, but he doesn’t want to hear it. He says he thought he couldn’t do it because of the baby, but it’s really because of Randal. She suggests they move, but Brad says they can’t afford it. He wants to do some bad things to Randal. Join the club. Alex says something bad almost happened to him, but Brad says almost doesn’t count. Alex gets out of the car, and Brad drives off. Randal watches from the porch. Eddie and Randal are the worst.

Randal asks if they’re getting back together, but Alex says nothing. He tells her that he’ll be in the shed. She goes in, and he says maybe not.

Kelly wakes up to a dog barking. She checks on Justice, seeing the top of his head. She pulls down the covers, and he’s fine. She makes sure the windows are locked. I’m as anxious as she is, wondering when and where Travis will pop out. She checks the rest of the house, and I wonder why she’s not carrying a weapon. She makes sure the front windows are locked. I can’t take this stress. She makes sure the doors are locked, and puts the chain on. I can’t stand it. She goes back to bed, but I’m not comfortable.

She turns out the light. Travis’s hand comes over her mouth and I almost scream.

Next time, the 90-minute mid-season finale, Lushion tells Natalie to lock the door, the custody hearing happens, Julius tells Ben that he’s looking for a new crew, Steven says it’s going down, and Lushion says, “Bye, Eddie.”

Below Deck Mediterranean

The wind has picked up, the yacht is about to hit the rocks, and Max is trying to push the boat with the tender. That isn’t a euphemism for anything. He’s supposed to push the yacht with a smaller boat. Captain Sandy asks what he’s waiting for, and she has to explain how it works. Hannah brings chips and dips for the guests, even though she’s concerned. The captain wants to reset the anchors, and Wes explains to the guests that it’s nothing, even though it’s something.

Lauren is annoyed that Bobby is going around talking smack about her. She’d thought they were friends. Bobby whines about being alone and losing his only friend, Hannah. Well, he should have thought about that before. Bugs is feeling down about her grandmother’s passing, and feels like she should be with her family, but tries to keep her chin up. The guests go naked paddle-boarding. Hannah tries to get Chef Adam to put on an apron with a muscle-guy’s body on it, but that’s a no. Captain Sandy is invited to dine with the guests.

More naked news is filmed. A request has been made for a cake shaped like a nude woman for dessert after dinner. Adam finds that baking it is more fun than he thought it would be. The captain is concerned about everyone being nakey at the table.

Bobby whines some more about his life sucking. He wants to be friends with Hannah again. He pulls her aside, and says he jumped to conclusions. Hannah says that she never said anything bad about him, and he says that’s not what Lauren told him. They hug it out, and Hannah says her feelings were hurt. In her interview, Hannah says that Bobby has burned her one too many times, so she’s proceeding with caution.

Four fabulous courses are in the making, and with the captain at the table, the pressure is on. Hannah says it’s important to her, because even though they got off to a rocky start, she and the captain are in a good place now. Anchor watch is set up. Bobby shows Wes a stupid video on his phone, while Lauren slaves over the laundry. In her interview, Hannah says you have to be thick-skinned in the yachting biz.

Lauren isn’t talking to anyone, so Bugs tries to engage her. Lauren says she just wants to do her job, and not be trashed by anyone. She starts getting all weepy, and Bugs can’t believe it, since she just lost her grandma.

The table is gorgeous, with lots of crystal and gold and sparkles. Mr. Skin talks about how he got into the business by watching lots of movies. Adam (who I keep wanting to call “Ben”) flirts with Malia. In his interview, he talks about a long-term relationship he had. His girlfriend never told her parents about him because of cultural differences, and she broke his heart. Lauren overhears Bobby talking about her. Malia is helping at the same time she’s on anchor watch. That sounds like an accident waiting to happen.

Adam tells Hannah that she should slow down and give the guests time to enjoy the meal. Captain Sandy tells a tale of the sea at the table, while the entrees are put together. Bugs says it’s all about communication, and Adam says it’s the first time he’s sweating in the galley. He and Bugs put cake nipples together. The crew don shirts with bikini bodies on them. The captain excuses herself, and claims she’s going to look them up online.

The cake is served. The crew gets a standing ovation, and Bobby sees dollar signs. Mr. Skin says he can’t wait for the pie section, and even I have to laugh. Adam thanks everyone for their help. Apparently, naked cakes are difficult business, and take a village. He watches on closed circuit as one of the guests spins around on the lazy Susan without underwear. Is this one of those bleachable moments?

Lauren calls her father. She tells him she’s feeling alone. In her interview, she says that her parents are going through a messy divorce, and one of the reasons she took the job was to get away from it. She realizes she has to just focus on her work. Hannah and Bugs have coffee on deck, and Hannah gives Bugs kudos for a job well done. Bugs says it’s hard to believe she won’t be doing things anymore with her grandmother. Hannah talks about losing her brother at a young age, when he was just ten. She says Bugs’s family would be proud of her.

Malia is glad for an easy day, since she had to work until 3 am. The deckhands pull up the anchor, but something is wrong. There’s a huge, messy ball of chains that keeps the anchor from going up totally. Malia is like, of course, since it’s her first time pulling up anchor. Max says he’s never seen it this bad, and doesn’t have an actual solution. He explains this is what happens when you have two anchors and the boat starts moving around. Captain Sandy says they’re in trouble, since they have to get the guests to port in time. She says it’s the same as a necklace being tangled; you work the chain until it loosens. Ugh. Good luck.

The guests are starting to look, which puts more pressure on the deckhands. Bobby tries to tell the captain what to do, and she says she needs assistance, not resistance. Bugs says the crew has to keep the drama to themselves, and keep the guests distracted. Bobby continues to tell Captain Sandy how to do her job. She reminds him that she’s been doing this for nearly thirty years. In his interview, Max says when it comes to emergency situations, you just follow orders.

Captain Sandy leans almost entirely over the side of the boat. Max explains that the last thing you want to do is cut the anchor, since those are your brakes. The guests do some more naked news, and the captain calls for a water taxi. Wes gets into the water. He wants to see what he can from a safe distance.

Somehow, they make things worse, and the wind is picking up. Hannah explains to the guests that they’re having a problem with the anchor, but they’re getting a tender to bring them back so they can enjoy the afternoon. Captain Sandy gives the deckhands instructions over the walkie-talkie. Ooh, Adam is in full distraction mode and just made the most amazing appetizers. One of the guests says it’s plant-based paradise. Hannah calls for help putting the luggage on the taxi, and the captain tells the crew to get in their dress uniforms. Bobby is concerned the delay will affect their tip.

The guests had a fabulous – or “skintastic” – time. Mr. Skin tells the crew how much they enjoyed themselves. He has some individual compliments, and calls the captain “badass,” giving her the tip. He adds that getting stuck didn’t affect anything; they’re all happy. The guests board the tender. The captain tells the crew to grab something to eat and get back to it; they’ll deal with the tip later. Bobby says it’s like being on Gilligan’s Island, except they’re the island. He explains to Bugs how the anchor got tangled.

Bugs calls home, and says she wants to be there. If they want her to come, she will. Sounds like she’s staying. Lauren apologizes to Bugs, and says she was being selfish. They hug it out, but Bugs isn’t sure what she’s apologizing for. I guess her mind is (understandably) somewhere else, since she was previously annoyed with Lauren being self-centered.

A rope gets tangled in the anchor lines, and one of the deckhands tries to cut it. In the meantime, the girls decide to go for a swim. Adam is content to watch. It’s illegal to pull into port without an anchor, and no way is the captain losing them. We hear a big noise. To be continued…

Next time, who knows? They didn’t say. We never got to my favorite part either – tip time.

🍸 Tomorrow, Bethenny is a guest on Watch What Happens Live. I always look forward to her spilling the tea. The LA week has been fun so far, but I’m really not feeling the large, vocal audience.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVKlGkVMxIM

May 16, 2017 – Nelle is Found, Julius Visits Randal, Naked People on a Boat & Some Extra Stuff

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Michael sees Nina at the MetroCourt and asks if she’s spoken to Nelle, but she hasn’t, and she hasn’t checked her messages. He says she might want to listen to the message Nelle left; she’s quitting. Charlotte comes running up to Nina. Lulu has her there for ice cream. Lulu tells Nina that no one picked Charlotte up from school, so they called her. Nelle was a no-show.

That’s because she’s unconscious on the docks.

Elizabeth and Franco bring the boys home. Franco tells Jake that he totally scored with his magic act, and they’ll open the rest of the presents tomorrow, when Jason and Sam are there. Ack. This show has a bit of a problem with continuity at times – they said they were doing that yesterday. Elizabeth and Franco go to the kitchen, and Jake tells Aiden not to tell anyone what he saw, not even Cameron. It’s a secret.

Griff is washing up, since we have to see him shirtless as often as possible. He makes a call to Anna and leaves a message. He says he wants to make sure she’s taking care of herself, and if she needs anything, he’s there.

In London, Anna tries to speak, and the doctor calls for a sedative. He prepares the injection, and she says, no, it’s a mistake. He tells Sister Caroline that the patient has to be sedated at all times.

We revisit fake Anna and Valentin’s scene from yesterday. She says she only wants him, and he rips the chimera necklace off of her. He says she just wants the Chimera, and after all this time, he’s a step ahead of her. She squawks about the necklace, and he says that can be fixed, but the watch probably can’t. He tells her that it’s just as well. He doesn’t want anyone listening in on what’s going to happen.

The doctor tells Sister Caroline that the patient is disoriented, and he doesn’t want her causing herself harm. He tells Caroline to do her job and he’ll do his. In her mind, Anna tells herself not to give in and to fight it.

Valentin says the watch explains how “Anna” knew where and when to find him, and why she didn’t want to take the watch back. She admits to spying on him, and says he’s created the life he’s wanted for himself. It includes Nina and Charlotte, but it’s the illusion of a family. They come from the same place and have made the same compromises. Nina will never understand, and maybe that’s why he wants more. Within their lies is a truth that Nina can never understand. Valentin says he understands she wanted the Chimera so much, she was willing to trash his life, so good luck seducing it out of him.

Jake tells Aiden that he wasn’t supposed to see it, and Jake is the only one who can use it. Elizabeth and Franco come back in. Elizabeth thinks Aiden is tired, so she sends him upstairs. Jake won’t let Franco touch the box, saying a magician never gives up his secrets. Franco says he has a point. Franco asks if he wants to do an encore of last year for the Nurses Ball, but Jake wants a solo. He’s going to do magic.

Griff sees Charlotte at the bar eating ice cream. I guess Port Charles has no laws prohibiting children sitting at bars like like we do IRL. He tells her that he and her father had angry words, but he didn’t mean to scare her. He asks if they can be friends. Charlotte says she’s supposed to be polite to him. He asks if he can join her.

Lulu doesn’t understand why Valentin can’t be bothered to pick up his messages. Nina says he was otherwise engaged. She asks Lulu if she didn’t want to spend more time Charlotte. They all wonder where Nelle is. Michael leaves to find out. Lulu says Nina is being quiet, and Nina says her feelings are none of Lulu’s business. Lulu says as Charlotte’s mother, she has a right to know what’s going on, and she’d care less about Nina’s life if it didn’t impact her daughter’s.

Charlotte shares her ice cream with Griff. She shows him a flyer for a spring festival at her school. He thinks she should invite everyone. She says she’ll invite him if he doesn’t fight with her poppa. He apologizes for losing his temper, and asks her to forgive him.

Nina tells Lulu sorry that she’s not getting dramatic, but she’s trying to show Charlotte that when things don’t go your way, you adjust and move on. Michael comes back, telling them that the housekeeper at Windemere hasn’t seen Nelle, even though all of her things are there, and Nelle isn’t answering her phone. He wants to go out to Windemere, and Nina tells him to call them when he finds out anything. Nina says she doesn’t have time to deal with Lulu. Lulu says Charlotte thought her father left her like Claudette did. Nina says he would never do that. Lulu says to tell Valentin it’s going to cost him. Nina says tell him herself, because she’s not going back to Windemere.

Elizabeth asks if Jake feels better about things. Franco says he was on the island and it’s a scary place. Jake says he’s not scared anymore. Franco suggests he practice some magic.

Sister Caroline says she’s grateful for the doctor saving “Alex’s” life. He tells her that he doesn’t need her gratitude, just her cooperation. Anna thinks, just help me, and Caroline tells her not to fight it, and just rest.

Valentin says “Anna” didn’t care about the reach of the Chimera when she asked him to steal it, now she’s using her powers for good? She says it’s for them. He calls her delusional and arrogant. (Who else is delusional and arrogant? Keep thinking.) She says their pull toward each other is stronger than the lies they tell themselves. He’s still alive because she cared about him. She gets testy about the Chimera, and says just tell her where it is, so it can be over. Then she corrects herself, saying then they can be together, if he wants.

Lulu asks Nina if there’s trouble. Nina says she’s going to be working into the night, and so is Valentin. Griff joins them with Charlotte, and tells them he was invited to the spring festival. Nina says it’s Charlotte’s night, and she can invite whoever she wants. Charlotte goes to get her backpack, and Lulu says Charlotte is coming home with her.

Michael calls out for Nelle at the docks. He sees the crates toppled, and finds her. He tells her she’s going to be okay, and calls 911. Yeah. You’re the jerk who left her there alone in the dark, when there have been 47 murders there.

Franco shuffles the cards. Elizabeth picks one. Jake says don’t show it to him. He makes the correct guess, a queen of hearts. Franco says they’re all queens, and turns them over. Sure enough, they are. Jake says not all, and tells Franco to look in his wallet, where he finds a king of hearts. Jake says a magician never tells his secrets, and goes upstairs. Franco says he must have done it at the park, and Elizabeth says maybe he can do magic. They agree it’s good to see him acting normal.

“Anna” tells Valentin that it’s always been about them and what they need. Passion and betrayal goes hand in hand. If he didn’t want it as much as she did, he wouldn’t have let Nina leave. She talks about what she heard when listening in, and says the marriage was never going to last, because Nina doesn’t know who he really is. He tells her to stop it. She asks if he’s going to kill her or make love to her. I was actually hoping for him ripping off her mask.

Nelle is brought into the hospital. Michael says she came to briefly and seemed to recognize him, but he thinks she was attacked. Her purse and phone are nowhere to be found. He tells them she only has one kidney. Griff wheels her in.

Nina tells Lulu not to be ridiculous; Charlotte is coming with her. Lulu asks if she’s going to sleep on the office floor, and says she’s taking her home. Nina says if the judge finds out, Lulu is going to have a problem, but Lulu says the judge will see that Valentin’s perfect life isn’t so perfect. Nina says they didn’t call her, and Lulu says that’s because she’s not Charlotte’s mother. Nina says she couldn’t love Charlotte more if she’d given birth to her. Lulu says she should want what’s best for Charlotte then.

Franco moves in for a kiss, but Elizabeth is like, not now. He says she was glad to see him at the park, but she says the problem is that he lied. He says he just left out some details. She says she thought they were in it together, and he tells her that she would have tried to talk him out of it. They argue a little, say I love you, and kiss.

“Anna” asks why Valentin is doing this, when what they want is to be together. He says they don’t always want what’s best for themselves. She asks what’s the alternative, deny what they want? She says separately, they’re forces to be reckoned with, but together, they’re unstoppable. No more games. He says she’s right. Game over. She loses.

Caroline tells real Anna, sorry, and calls her Dr. Merrick. Anna thinks she has to resist, but the more she fights, the weaker she becomes. She tells herself it’s like a current, and to slip away and rise to the surface. She tries to mess with the tube in her arm, and Caroline starts to call for Dr. Lancaster, but Anna grabs her arm.

Elizabeth says that Franco was trying too hard to protect her, and he says that she was trying too hard to protect him from Jason. He says whatever should come up in their lives together, he’ll trust her. She says from now on she’ll trust that he can take risks. He thinks they’re good at the relationship thing. They kiss some more, and Jake comes downstairs.

Charlotte says she’s ready to go home. Lulu asks if she’d like to spend night. Nina says she and Charlotte’s poppa are both working late, and she can do a sleepover. Charlotte agrees and leaves with Lulu.

Anna wonders why she’s there at the hospital. Caroline says Dr. Lancaster found her in her flat. Anna says that’s not right, and Caroline says she’s just disoriented and she’ll get the doctor.  Anna says, please don’t. She’s not Alex; she’s Anna Devane.

“Anna” tells Valentin there’s still a way they can both win. Tell her where the Chimera is, and they’ll both be free and be equals. They’ll be two people who understand each other. Valentin tells her that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result, but he says that’s not true. It’s really drinking the same poison over and over, and thinking you can handle it. He’s been addicted to her, but he’s cured now. She says just like that, and he says it’s like a fever broke, and he knows what he has to do. He grabs a scarf and begins to wrap the ends around his hands, saying she’s pushed him too far. He comes toward her.

Michael remembers his last conversation with Nelle, and telling her she had no reason to stay. Griff is concerned with potential kidney trauma.

Jake forgot his magic box. Elizabeth says they’ll be back after tucking Aiden in. When they’re gone, Jake opens the box.  He takes out the Chimera. He says he wishes he was a real magician, because he’d make it disappear and would never have to think about it again.

Caroline tells Anna that she’s Alex Merrick. Anna says she doesn’t know how she got here, but the doctor is in on it. Caroline says this is her clinic, and that the doctor will explain everything. Anna stops her, and says she’s not sick. She’s being held against her will and Caroline has to help her. Dr. Lancaster overhears and makes a mean soap opera face.

Nina looks at her ring. She remembers Valentin giving it to her. Valentin walks in, and says he has so much to tell her. She asks if he was with Anna. He says he was, and thanks her for forcing him to admit what he knew all along – Anna was playing him. He says she won’t be coming between them again – ever.

Tomorrow, Valentin says he’ll get Nina to trust him again, Lulu says life is full of unexpected surprises, Martina tells Sonny that he has the most to lose, and Dr. Lancaster asks what’s going on.

If Loving You is Wrong

The officer, whose name no one ever says, tells Kelly he has a warrant for her DNA. She says she had nothing to do with Ramses’ murder, but he says since she’s been in the house, they need to exclude her. Kelly starts to argue, and he says they have to eliminate everyone who was there. Kelly says she’s not doing anything without a lawyer; she doesn’t trust him. He asks if her temper gets her in trouble. He tells Kelly that she can call her lawyer, but he has an actual warrant, and asks what it’s going to be. She says fine, take it. She sees Travis and is like, wth?

Commercial break with vital information. The Haves and the Have Nots is back on June 20.

Travis says that he got a call from his parents that he was wanted at the station. Kelly starts making a fuss, so Rick takes her to get the test done. The officer tells Travis that he didn’t listen to Rick when he told Travis to stay away from Kelly, so stay away. Travis insists she wanted him to pick up Justice, and asks if he has to call every time Kelly wants a favor. The officer doesn’t understand why he would help her if she’s so crazy. Travis says he’s a child of God and she asked for help, and the officer says even God wants him to use common sense. Travis says he has the evidence. The officer says he has a restraining order against her too, so stay away from both Kelly and Justice, and block her number. Travis asks if he can go, and the officer tells him have a nice day, but won’t shake his hand. Officer No-Name and I didn’t start off on the right foot, but he’s growing on me. I have the feeling he’s thinking more than he’s saying.

Kelly asks the officer if he’s just going to let Travis leave. He says he told Travis to stay away from her and block her number. She asks what happened to serving and protecting. He says he’s seen this kind of situation go bad. She says she hasn’t done anything. He says, sorry. She walks out, and he calls after her, saying that she should really let this go.

Esperanza is watching the kids in the park. She calls Kelly, and asks what happened. Kelly says she doesn’t want to know. Esperanza tells her that she has Justice. Kelly asks why Alex is always leaving people’s children, and Esperanza says they both called and texted her five times. Kelly tells her about how Travis was let go. Esperanza says ever since the captain’s been gone, nothing has been done right, so she’s going to check into it. Kelly says the officer gave him a warning, but Travis isn’t going to listen. She says she’s never had a man like this before. Esperanza says she has, and Kelly is doing all the right things. She asks about the restraining order, and Kelly says she has to get a new lawyer. She tells Esperanza about them wanting DNA because she was in Ramses’ house. Esperanza says she had to do it once, and it’s normal procedure. Esperanza offers to drop off Justice, and Kelly says she’ll watch Alex’s kids until she gets home. I have to add that Esperanza is not dressed like anyone dresses to play with kids in the park. She’s wearing a tight sweater that couldn’t be cut any lower, and velvet pants. And boots. I didn’t notice what kind of heels they had. I was too busy staring at her cleavage. Geez.

Natalie’s phone rings. It’s a collect call from Joey in prison. He says he’s sorry, and asks how she is. She asks if they’re taking care of him, and he says he’s fine. He tells her that it’s his fault; he shouldn’t have carried the gun. She says he shouldn’t have, but she’s glad he did. If he hadn’t had the gun, he’d be dead. She tells him she loves him, and he says he loves her too. She tells him everything is going to be okay, and she’s getting him out of there. He says that would be great, but he just wants her to be happy. The recording tells them one more minute. Natalie says he makes her happy, and Joey thanks her for saying that. She says he was doing good. He could have gone back out on the streets, but didn’t; she’s proud of him. They have thirty seconds, and say another I love you. Natalie says she’ll see him soon, and he says he’ll be waiting. She hangs up, and starts to cry.

Lushion comes in, and Natalie says she’s all right. He says no she’s not, but it’s okay. He tells her to take a break, but she says she has too much to do. He says to let it go and let her heart break. She cries on his shoulder. He says he’s got her, and rocks her like a baby. Lushion is the best.

There’s a knock at Randal’s door. It’s Julius. Randal and I make the same astonished face, and Randal says it’s a surprise. Julius asks to come in. He says that Randal has done something different with the house, but Randal says he just had the carpets cleaned. There are no carpets, so I don’t know what to think about that. Do you send carpets out to be cleaned? Julius tells Randal that his father cut him out of the will, and it’s because Randal gave the attorney an evaluation of him. He reads from it. It says, among other things, that he’s a narcissist, and for his own good, shouldn’t be in control of anything without a trustee. Randal says he’s sorry. He and Julius Sr. had a history; he’d testified in a lot of his court cases. Julius says his father is gone now, but he’s going to give Randal an opportunity to right this wrong. He wants him to rewrite the evaluation. Randal says sure. Julius says make sure he gets it to the attorney, who’s his attorney now.

Julius says he heard some racist wanted to hang Randal. Randal says it’s true. Julius says if the evaluation had gone to the court, he would have wished they’d succeeded. He changes his mind, saying that he’ll pick up the evaluation himself. Randal says he’ll have it by tomorrow, and the next one will be so much better. He tells Julius that his attorney will have to sign and notarize it. Julius says when his attorney’s hand is better, he will, explaining that he was stabbed with a letter opener. He asks Randal if they’re friends, and Randal says sure. Julius hugs him. He tells Randal, burn him again, he’ll be the one who hangs Randal. Randal isn’t having the best week, but that’s okay with me.

Eddie bursts into Brad’s office. Brad asks Eddie to leave him alone. Eddie gets loud about Lushion banging Brad’s wife. He tells him on top of it, Lushion is undercover FBI. Brad tells him the drugs are making him paranoid. Eddie says he’s working on proof. Brad says he has a client coming, and Eddie has to leave. Alex walks in, and Eddie wastes no time in calling her a slut. Brad says Eddie is leaving, but Eddie says he’s not letting her work her snake charm on him, because he doesn’t understand what a snake charmer does. Brad pushes him out the door and I laugh. Eddie is a borderline comic character to begin with, since he’s so ridiculous.

Brad tells Alex, sorry, and asks what’s up. She says she doesn’t know; she doesn’t even know why she’s there. She just wanted to see him. She says she’s sorry. She knows she’s said it a million times, and Brad says they both have. She says he didn’t do anything, and he says he called her parents. She says she did that too. He asks what now, and she says she wants to thank him for saving her son. He tells her she’s welcome. She knows the kind-hearted man she fell in love with is still in there, and wants to thank him.

Idiot Eddie comes back in with Marcie. Brad pushes him back out the door again, and I laugh again. Brad asks what Marcie is doing there. She says she came to take him to dinner, and calls him her handsome lover. Brad says he told her to stop doing this. Alex says bye, and Marcie taunts her as she leaves. Brad asks why she’s doing this, and she says, sorry. Brad tells her that he can’t go to dinner, and Marcie asks what Alex wanted. Brad says she thanked him for saving her child. I wonder why Marcie acts like she’s high half the time. He tells her he has to get back to work, and she leaves. Someone get Brad some Tylenol.

Pete calls Lushion and asks if it’s true that Andrew is missing. Lushion says it is, and Pete asks if it was Eddie. Lushion thinks it was, and Pete says he has to be stopped. Lushion is thinking it needs to go to the FBI, but thinks they’re already on to it. He asks Pete why he thinks the FBI guy is outside his door. Pete asks about the tape, and Lushion says they couldn’t find it. He tells Pete that the most important thing is stopping Eddie. Lushion says the FBI is already outside his door, but if he wants to, go for it. Pete says they have to find Andrew, and Lushion says they’re trying. Pete thinks Ben might know. He was outside trying to distract the officer when Eddie tried to put a needle in Pete’s IV. Lushion says to make sure he tells them that too. Pete thinks Andrew might be dead, since Eddie is a stone-cold killer. Lushion tells him to tell the officer everything, and says he’ll drop by later.

Randal goes to Marcie and Brad’s apartment, with the excuse that he brought her mail. He talks about what a dump it is and she says it’s better than a shed for sex. She tells him to get out, but he won’t leave. He asks what’s in the other room. She says the bed where they have sex every night, now go. He says he’s not done yet, and she says fine, he can watch how she greets Brad. Randal says if she has to say how great he is, he must be terrible. Marcie says she used to say the same about him, and pretends to fake it. She says it’s called acting, and asks why he’s there. He thought she might want to know the child might not be his after all. She doesn’t care. He says it might be Lushion’s and she tells him to get out with all of it. She says he’s trying to get her to make trouble for Natalie, but he says he already told her, and he’s surprised they didn’t break up. Marcie says they’re solid, and he says maybe Natalie isn’t as “ghetto-dumb” as he thought. Randal says it smells like broke in the apartment, and Marcie says in a minute it will smell like glorious sex. She says next time he wants to spread a lie, find someone stupid. He tells her he misses her and that she must miss it. She tells him to get out. He finally leaves.

Kelly has a flat tire. She changes her shoes, saying if it’s not one thing, it’s another. She opens the trunk and Travis pops out, scaring us both. He throws her down, and puts his hand over her mouth. He asks why she went to the cops, and threatens to kill her. She struggles and tries to scream, and he puts one hand over her mouth and the other on her throat.

Next time, Lushion can’t get anything out of Alex about Andrew, Brad talks to Alex, and Lushion tells Eddie to get out of his face. There’s one more episode before the finale.

Below Deck Mediterranean

We flash back to the crew’s night out and Bobby going apesh*t on Hannah for basically no reason. She asks what she’s done to him, and he says she threw him under the bus. Malia says they weren’t talking about him, but he doesn’t believe it. Hannah keeps asking what she said, and he finally closes the door in her face. She calls him a steroid injected d*ckhead, and says she’ll be remembering the conversation for a long time.

In the morning, Hannah and Malia whisper about what happened. Hannah says sometimes Bobby’s ego gets overly inflated, and Malia is like, sorry. Meanwhile, Bobby is talking smack about Hannah to the deckhands. Hannah tells Lauren that Bobby went psycho. Lauren says she doesn’t remember Hannah ever saying anything bad about him. In her interview, Lauren tells us that she was supposed to go on a date with Bobby, and he brought a couple of other girls along. They ran into Hannah, who couldn’t believe it, and told Lauren it was disrespectful. That never happened to me, but I’m pretty sure if it had, I would not have gone on the date.

The primary guest is a dude named Jim aka Mr. Skin, who has a website devoted to nakey celebs. His wife Michele and some key employees will also be in attendance. Hannah remembers the Tilted Kilt cruise, and how it didn’t end well with one of the crew members. As usual, there are a million dietary restrictions, which are different for everyone, and the guests also want to film a naked news segment.

Bobby tells Lauren that he wants to talk to Hannah, but Lauren doesn’t want to get involved. He says it’s happening, and she tells him to work it out with Hannah himself. He says he’s pulling her in and she’d better have his back. Bobby put the d in d-bag.

Chef Adam goes shopping at the outdoor market. Supplies are brought on board. In her interview, Hannah says there’s no coming back from the altercation with Bobby.  Wes almost puts regular cardboard in the microwave.

Bobby apologizes for insulting Hannah, BUT (Dr. Phil would say that negates the apology) says all he could think about is her trashing him to Lauren. Hannah says all she told Lauren was that it was unfair of him to bring other women on their date. A-hole Bobby calls Lauren to come to the deck. He’s annoyed that Hannah called him aggressive. Maybe he doesn’t know what that word means, because his picture is the definition. Lauren joins them, saying to call her the liar. She says they were drinking, and she doesn’t even remember what was said. She asks why he’s so upset, and he says the two of them are playing games. Lauren asks to go back to her work, and Bobby asks why she doesn’t go screw Ben. Ben gets my vote, but where did that come from, especially since he’s not on this charter?

In his interview, Bobby talks about taking Lauren somewhere, and her leaving with Ben. That actually sounds like poetic justice, considering that he brought extras to their date. Hannah says this has nothing to do with her, but Bobby insists they’re conspiring against him. Lauren calls Ben. She tells him she’s getting along great with Hannah. In her interview, she says that she and Ben hit it off, and he’s more her type than Bobby. She tells Ben about Bobby being a jerk, and telling her to go off with him. She tells Ben she misses him, and he says ditto.

Bobby calls his mommy. He tells her he’s been blindsided and duped. He says he got screwed over by Lauren. His mother’s heart is broken. In his interview, he tells us that he took this job to meet women. How’s that workin’ for ya? He starts bawling about some woman named Alex. He claims her mother thought he didn’t make enough money. His mom heaps him with praise, and makes raise-the-roof hand gestures.

Hannah has a stew meeting. She explains what Mr. Skin does, how tacky it is, and tells them there’s going to be a naked news filming.

Captain Sandy wants to make sure the deckhands can drop anchor successfully, and has them practice. In his interview, Bobby says that the captain doesn’t get on you when you make a mistake, but you feel it, and it’s worse. I translate that to mean it’s tough for Bobby to actually work and do things right.

Malia chats with Wes while they hose off the deck. Bugs gets a call from her mother. Her grandmother has passed away. Hannah says whatever she needs, she has. The captain talks about losing her mother when she was on a boat, and tells Bugs she’s there for her. In her interview, Bugs tells us how close they were, and how she wants to pull herself together, because it’s what her grandmother would want.

Everyone gets ready to greet the guests. After they arrive, Hannah does the tour. Lauren wants to stay as busy as possible to keep her mind off of idiot Bobby. Captain Sandy instructs the deckhands, while Mr. Skin instructs his employees about the photos he wants. Adam chops fruit. Hannah gives him a list of guest demands. All gluten free. The guests begin to film, and the captain is concerned about a family-centric boat coming past.

Lauren says it’s awkward with Bobby, who’s going out of his way to ignore her. Bugs is asked for help with a shot at the hot tub, and says there are unmentionable parts staring her right in the eyeballs. Wes is hoping not to mess up the anchor with all the naked ladies around.

The lunch table isn’t naked, and is beautifully adorned with a beach theme. Lunch is served. One of the guests is mistakenly served octopus when she opted out of that, but chooses not to get a replacement dish. She says that Adam’s cooking is so good, she might become a convert. Mr. Skin mentions a breast reduction, and one of the women doesn’t understand why anyone would do that. Bobby says you can’t not look.

Bobby wants Malia to know the fun Bobby instead of the pissed off Bobby. That should last all of five minutes. Max is impressed with how well Bugs is holding up. It’s dinnertime. In his interview, Adam says he’s never eaten raw, as one guest has requested, but if something makes him uncomfortable, bring it on. Lauren thinks Bobby has built up resentment from before. Another gorgeous table and meal is presented.

Lauren asks to talk to Bobby. She hates confrontation, and wonders if he wants a hug or milkshake. In her interview, Bugs says losing her grandma is one of many challenges, and she’s proud of how she held up. Lauren tells Bobby that she’s sorry she hurt him, however she hurt him. He says he jumped to conclusions about Hannah talking smack about him. Lauren says so did she, confusing Bobby. That’s probably not hard, but it does sound like she’s waffling. She tells him that he needs to own up to things. He’s 31 and a grown-ass man. He got drunk, and attacked both her and Hannah. They end up with no resolution and time wasted. No surprise. I don’t like the way Lauren is playing both sides – no doubt to avoid a conflict, but just making it worse – but Bobby is one of those people who will never admit he’s wrong.

Captain Sandy wants a rock to tie on; it helps to create a private sanctuary among the cliffs for the guests. Bobby complains to Wes in the crew mess. Lauren suggests they take it to their room instead of making it awkward. In the galley, Lauren asks if she can talk to Hannah. Hannah jokes around, asking Adam what he did to her. They go out on the deck, and Lauren tells Hannah about Bobby talking smack to the deckhands about her, making her uncomfortable. In her interview, Hannah says she has no time for tears and tantrums, but she’s concerned with Lauren’s well-being at work. She tells her not to let it affect her mentally.

Another glorious meal happens. Max and Wes go out to put a chain on the rocks they’ll anchor to. The guests are impressed with the location, which is beyond beautiful, with a private grotto. Bobby is stressed because he knows the captain is watching. She tells them excellent job. More food! A sink starts to overflow. Adam, Hannah, and Malia all help Lauren, who is desperately bailing water out of it. Hannah says it’s their job to make sure the guests don’t know what’s happening. The water finally starts to recede.

Some guests take photos and others play in the water. The wind picks up, and the boat is getting too close to the cliffs. Captain Sandy wants Max to push the boat with the tinder, but he seems to be ignoring her.

Next time, Lauren thinks it’s unfair, Adam gets stressed and snippy, and there are issues with the anchor chain.

🍸 I checked out What Happens at The Abbey. It looks like a trash heap. The Abbey is a celebrity bar in Hollywood that’s gone through several incarnations. One bartender tells us if you have a dream, it’s the place to make it come true, but I find that hard to believe. Another says it’s the only place where a lesbian and a straight woman will fight over who’s going to have a gay man’s baby. I’ll take their word for it. Some guy named Daniel tells us he started the man bun, and I hate him already. After the first couple of minutes, I wonder if I can even watch this, and then Brandi Glanville walks in, and I’m pretty sure I can’t. She’s just as creepy as ever. As a matter-of-fact, most of these people seem creepy. And needless to say, extremely into themselves. There was an upside when Tori Spelling arrived. I’ve loved her ever since I saw her in Trick. If you’ve never seen that movie, I highly recommend it, especially if you like musicals. The plot revolves around a gay guy who’s writing a musical, and Tori is his best friend. She also has the Best. Monologue. Ever. Said guy, played by Christian Campbell, is also trying to get his date alone, but everything possible happens to thwart them. It’s very sweet and clever, and his song that keeps cropping up, Enter You, will be your ear worm forever. The fact that I got so off track just goes to show how bad The Abbey is, and how I want to get it out of my mind as quickly as possible.

🚛 I also watched one of my favorites, Hoarders. I also love Hoarding: Buried Alive, but, same thing. They were airing quite a few of them, and the last episode I caught showed two fails, which is unusual. One was a woman who was of the mindset that when the world was in its last days, people would come to her for stuff. Because we’ll all need moldy blankets and broken birdcages. She just wouldn’t accept that she had a mental disorder or accept the help, although for a while, they moved things from pile to pile. At the end, Corey talked about her victim mentality, and that she’ll have the perverse satisfaction of thinking that she’s been screwed over again. The other hoarder was also a woman, and they were able to clear out her place, but she wasn’t happy because of what she had to give up. More moldy blankets and broken birdcages. She had a really cute home when it was over too. I thought it was brave of the program to air unsuccessful efforts.

Why should they have to lose any more than they’d lost?Hoarding: Buried Alive

May 9, 2017 – A Scarecrow on the Island, Julius Wants to Know the Enemy & a Tribal Themed Dinner

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Nathan meets Nina at the bar. She says she’s made a decision about Maxie. Lulu interrupts, asking Nina for a favor. She wants to know where Valentin is.

He’s out jogging and runs into Anna, who is also out jogging. He says if he didn’t know better, he’d accuse her of following him.

In Greece, Jason is on the phone trying to wrangle a boat, and Franco walks by. Jason slams Franco up against the wall and asks what he’s doing there.

Bobbie asks Carly what’s wrong. Carly says her attorney wants her to come up with a diary of her marriage to Sonny. Bobbie asks if it’s all five marriages, or just the latest. Ha-ha! Just this one. Carly says the sooner it’s filed, the sooner Sonny will get a clue that everything that was his, is hers now. Bobbie thinks she should consider a more amicable settlement. Carly says no way, and that’s why she brought Martina in. She needed someone Sonny didn’t know or could intimidate.

Guess again. Martina sits with Sonny. He says she has a problem, but he has a solution.

Nina tells Lulu that she can consider a request, since she’s Charlotte’s stepmom. Lulu says she wanted to take Charlotte for an outing with Rocco, and would like her to stay overnight. Nina says she gets an hour a week, and Charlotte hasn’t expressed wanting more time. They nearly get in an argument. Nina says Lulu is challenging the court mandate, and it’s not right. She says Charlotte is like a doll to Lulu, and she’s not considering Charlotte’s feelings. Lulu tells her to back off; she’s not really related to Charlotte. She says Valentin will betray Nina, just like he has everyone else.

Valentin says Anna’s ankle seems better, and wonders if her injury wasn’t contrived. Anna says she didn’t run into him by accident; they need to talk. Valentin asks why.

Jason tells Franco that only Sam knew he was in Greece. Franco says until she told him and Elizabeth. Jason asks if Franco is trying to play hero, but Franco says his sole motivation is to help Jake. He says step one, Jason will need a boat, and he has one – one with a cooler. Jason says he’ll pay him, but Franco says they’ll have to work together, and they should leave now.

Carly tells Bobbie that fighting Sonny is the best choice, and Bobbie says yeah, for the lawyer. I’ve got to agree with her there. Carly says that Sonny signed over his assets to her, and she’s going to keep them. She says it’s not about money. Sonny forced Jax to leave the country, and he can’t come back. Bobbie says he’s a billionaire; he’ll figure something out. She says Carly has to look at the reality. Sonny is a mobster with a bad temper and jealous streak. Is she really surprised? Carly says that’s why she brought in Martina, to make sure he pays dearly.

Martina tells Sonny that if anything, they’re at a stalemate. Sonny says he didn’t ask her there to blackmail her; someone saw them at The Haunted Star. Sonny says she’s already met her, and tells Martina about Ava. If Ava thinks she can hurt Sonny or Carly, she won’t hesitate. Then they both lose. He says that’s why he needs her help.

Nina asks how Nathan can be friends with Lulu, and he says she’s not always like that. Nah, just every time she doesn’t get what she wants immediately. Nina says it’s Lulu’s first move to get Charlotte away from her and Valentin, and it’s never going to happen.

Lulu sits down with Doc and Laura. She wishes she hadn’t lost her cool. Doc asks what happened. Lulu says it doesn’t matter.

Nina tells Nathan that Valentin offered Lulu joint custody, but she didn’t want it. She says she knows Valentin has flaws, but he loves his daughter and she loves him, and it’s real. She’ll be damned if Lulu is going to break up their family.

Anna asks Valentin if he prefers they call it closure and never see one another again. He asks why she’s there, and she says they have to talk about the Chimera Project.

Jason asks why Franco is doing this. He tells Jason that he loves Elizabeth and cares about Jake. He suggests that they talk about what they agree on. They want to get to the bottom of things for Jake’s sake, and the answers are on the island. Jason asks if the boat really has a cooler, and tells Franco let’s go.

Carly tells Bobbie she’s not taking back anything she said, but when she was writing in the journal, taking inventory of her marriage, she remembered what it was like when she and Sonny loved each other.

Sonny tells Martina that the best case is, Carly doesn’t believe Ava, but Carly’s cousin owns The Haunted Star, and all she has to do is ask for footage. Martina says Carly will just fire her and get another attorney, but Sonny says he’d rather fight with the devil he knows. She says, the one he can leverage? He tells her that once it’s over, they won’t have Ava hanging over their heads. Martina says it could come back to haunt him later, but Sonny says it will be fine. Martina wonders why she feels like there’s a catch, and Sonny says that’s because there is.

Carly tells Bobbie about Morgan’s prescription bottle being found after the robbery, and how Sonny had it tested. She says everything was fine, but when Sonny was telling her about it, they were two parents mourning their kid instead of fighting. Bobbie asks if they’d still be together if Morgan hadn’t died. Carly asks if it matters. Morgan died, and they reacted the way they did, and made the choices that they did. She says Sonny said the marriage was over, then she slept with Jax, and Sonny had him deported. She can’t go through life wishing Sonny was the way she wants him to be.

Sonny tells Martina that Carly is holding on to his assets to punish him, and Martina has to talk her out of it. He’s sure she’ll find the best solution for everyone, and she says he wants the best solution for himself. He tells her she has a lot of work to do, and makes a dimply smile as she leaves.

Valentin tells Anna that the Chimera Project was decades ago. He asks if she forgot about it or just him. Anna apologizes again for using him. She says it was easier not remembering, because now she has to live with it. She understands that her present struggle doesn’t compare to what she did to him. She says there were other potential buyers, and wants to know who Valentin turned it over to. He says he doesn’t want to discuss it.

Jason and Franco arrive at what Jason thinks is the place. The scarecrow is there. Franco asks him to look at something.

Lulu tells Laura and Doc that she and Charlotte are getting along so well, she thinks she can win this on the up and up. Laura thinks there should be a back-up plan. Lulu says it would be good to have dirt on Valentin just in case. She wants to bring him and his lying wife down, but she has to play nice for a while. Laura tells her keep in mind that Charlotte loves Valentin, and although she hates to admit it, Charlotte loves Nina too. Lulu says she’s winning Charlotte over.

Nina tells Nathan that she’s used to people hating Valentin, but wants to get off the subject. She says, being objective, Maxie did a lot for her. They disagree about Lulu and Charlotte, but they both love Nathan. It’s not doing their marriage any good with her in Portland, so Nina has decided to give Maxie the job back. She’s emailed her with an offer, and suggested they start fresh. She wants Nathan and Maxie to be as happy as she is with Valentin.

Anna tells Valentin that she can’t help wondering what the fallout was, and asks what if the damage wasn’t contained? He says the only reason he got involved was because of her, and doesn’t want to think about the whole mess. She says she’s sorry again, and he says she says that so often, he’s doubting her sincerity. He tells her to drop it.

Franco shows Jason a tree with the chimera carved into the trunk. Franco points out discrepancies in the timeline drawing. If Jake was behind the tree, he wouldn’t see the scarecrow. Jason examines the area around the scarecrow.

Kristina meets Sonny. She tells him she’s involved with the Nurses Ball, mostly because of Amy 2.0, who she’s living with now. She says she came there to see how he’s doing. He says everything is fine on the divorce front. Kristina says Michael told her that Carly wants everything.

Carly introduces Bobbie to Martina. Bobbie leaves to bother someone else, and Martina calls her a bit of a mom bear. Carly says that’s where she gets it. Martina asks how Bobbie is taking the divorce, and Carly says she’s concerned. When Martina mentions Michael, Carly says he wants her to compromise, and Martina says he might have a point. Maybe she should take a closer look at Diane’s proposal. Carly asks what happened that Martina wants to settle. Martina says nothing, she’s just presenting options, but Carly doesn’t buy it.

Sonny tells Kristina not to worry. She tells him to disregard the invoice from PCU. She says she’s finally gotten her head on straight – academically anyway. She’s committed to getting her degree, but she can wait. She doesn’t want him paying for anything. She says once she can access her trust fund, it will help. He’s glad she’s taking responsibility. She thinks maybe she can ask Michael for assistance in the meantime. Sonny says that he and Carly will settle soon.

Martina tells Carly that nothing has changed. The longer it goes on, the more money she makes, and she’ll make a killing at trial. She has reservations about moving ahead though. Costs will be great, not just financially. She says that Carly and Sonny seem in agreement about the kids, and that Carly doesn’t need the money. She’s hurt and angry, but they’re poor reasons to make decisions. Her best advice is to compromise.

Nathan asks if Nina is worried about Valentin’s past. She says no, but someone suggested something, and made her realize she’s overreacting. She says soon Maxie will be back in his arms. She gets a text from Maxie, who turns down the offer, saying she’s not sure if she’s coming back at all.

Lulu tells Laura and Doc that Valentin isn’t who he’s pretending to be, and that children are perceptive. When Charlotte sees who he really is, she’ll come running to Lulu. Doc tells her to concentrate on her relationship with Charlotte, but don’t manipulate her. Lulu says she doesn’t have to; real love trumps manipulation. Please. Lulu gets a text and has to pick up Rocco.

Doc tells Laura that she seems uneasy. She says that’s an understatement. He asks if she doesn’t trust Lulu’s assessment of the situation, but she says that she doesn’t trust Valentin.

Valentin tells Anna that they’re at an impasse. Anna says she needs for him to tell her out of decency. <snort> He tells her that she’s laying it on too thick. Anna says the project had potential to do harm, so please tell her he sold it to the DVX. He says that he can’t.

Jason sees shackles near the scarecrow. Franco says this is alarming.

Kristina asks how Sonny knows they’ll settle. He says that he has a feeling, and she asks what he’s not telling her.

Carly tells Martina no way is she going to settle. She says now that due diligence has been done, she wants to keep everything.

Nathan tells Nina this is the first he’s heard about Maxie staying in Portland indefinitely. It sounds like Maxie is telling him one thing, and Nina another.

Laura tells Doc that Valentin won’t stand for it. He killed her son, and it’s only a matter of time before he does the same to her daughter. She gets all weepy, and I’m wondering why the overreaction.

Valentin tells Anna that he sold the project to the highest bidder. She suggests greed won out, but he says the surgeries didn’t pay for themselves. He sold it for a huge amount of money. He tells her if they wanted to do something with it, they would have already. It will never see the light of day.

Jason remembers being held in the shackles. He looks at the tree. Franco asks what’s going on, and Jason says it’s him; he’s the scarecrow.

Tomorrow, Curtis can’t believe Jordan is making him do something, there’s a special delivery for Elizabeth, Franco says Jason is the one Jake is afraid of and Anna asks if Valentin wants her out of his life. I know I do.

If Loving You is Wrong

Eddie locks Brad’s office door, and says the party is just getting started. Brad tells Eddie to let Randal go, but instead he draws his gun. Eddie asks why Randal is there, and Randal says he came to apologize. Brad backs him up on that, and tells Eddie to let him go again. Eddie says no. He says he doesn’t give a damn anymore; he’s tired of seeing Randal’s face. He asks Brad what Randal said. Brad says Randal told him that he was sorry, which is usually how apologies work.

Eddie tells Brad about how he saw Randal and Alex together. He asks if that’s the kind of apology Randal gives. Brad is like, what? Eddie says they were about to make out when he pulled up. He says right before he came there, they were in his front yard. Randal says they were just talking about the child. Brad says Lushion’s child, and Eddie asks if Alex was swinging from every jungle tree or what? Randal says Alex told him Lushion was the father. Eddie says he should shoot him for telling such a lie. Randal tells him to ask her, and Eddie says he’ll ask them both. Brad says he’d like to keep his job, so just let Randal go. Eddie finally gives in, but stands in front of the door. Randal asks how he’s supposed to leave, and Eddie tells him to pick a window. (Hey, that’s what Kathryn told Veronica on The Haves and the Have Nots.) Brad finally steps in, and moves Eddie aside.

Brad says he can’t go around killing people. Eddie asks what’s wrong with him. Brad says he’s had enough of all of it, and all he wants is peace. Eddie says Alex is still sleeping with Randal. Brad says he needs Eddie to leave him alone. Eddie says he doesn’t know who Brad is anymore, and he’s a damn fool if he goes back with Alex.

Alex’s phone rings. It’s the doctor. She heard about what’s going on. She says Alex’s son is there, and she’s caring for him. Alex is like, thank God, and the doctor asks if she’d like to see him. She told the judge that he baby needs to be breastfed, but she can’t take him out of the nursery. Alex promises, and says she’ll be there as soon as she gets a babysitter.

Alex calls Esperanza, who can’t believe the mess going on with Travis. She says he’s stalking Kelly, who’s in with an officer. Alex asks if there’s any way Esperanza can come and watch the kids; she needs to get to the hospital. She tells Esperanza that she’s allowed to feed the nameless baby. Esperanza says she’ll be there asap, and Alex adds that she needs a ride. Geez.

Lushion tells Natalie that this guy can’t help her and it’s a waste of time, but she says she has to try. A guy knocks at the door and she offers him coffee, but Lushion says he’s here to talk about Joey, not to get free coffee. Natalie takes Lushion into the kitchen, and says he’s welcome to go. Nameless guy tells him not to be upset, and Lushion tells him to do his job. He says Joey violated his probation, and the judge will have to rule on it, and tells Natalie that Joey is getting good care. I don’t know if he’s a lawyer, or caseworker, or what. Natalie says that Joey was starting to turn his life around. The guy says he shot someone, and he wasn’t supposed to have a gun. Natalie asks him if he knows how hard it is for a Black man when he gets out of jail , and that Joey was doing well. He repeats that it’s in the judge’s hands. Lushion tells him to get his ass out. Dude leaves. Lushion tells Natalie they’ll get a lawyer, and if dude is on the case, he’ll have him removed. He knows people. Natalie asks what’s up his sleeve. Lushion says after the house and Joey’s bills, there isn’t much money left, but he knows some people. Natalie says she’s engaged to an OG. She says she liked his jealousy, and he says he wasn’t anything of the kind. He tells her to stop being mad at him when he wants to do things his way. She says he’s always there for her, and he says he’s trying. They hug and kiss and are all happy again.

Marcie visits Louise. Louise says she’s good, and Marcie jokes that they should go shopping. Louise says she’s in good spirits. She was wondering what Marcie was going to say earlier, but Marcie says she doesn’t remember. Louise doesn’t believe it, and tells her, out with it. Marcie says it’s Brad. She’s in love with him. Louise asks if she’s sure, and she says she is. Louise asks when it happened, but Marcie doesn’t know. Louise tells her to be careful; he’s the rebound man. Marcie says they’re not trying to be together, but it’s nice to feel love, real love, safe and pure. Louise thinks it’s based on sex, but Marcie says they’re not even having sex, but Brad is good with intimacy. Louise suggests she let it go until she’s cleaned up her old house. If she moves into the new one too soon, she won’t get her deposit back. She tells Marcie to make sure she’s over her feelings for Randal before she moves on. Marcie says she still loves Randal, and Louise says all the more reason to slow it down. Marcie says she’ll never be with him, but Louise says never say never. Truth! Every time I’ve said never, it’s happened.

Diane leaves the jail, crying. She calls Kelly and starts yelling at her. Kelly asks how she can help. Diane says she’s at the jail, and they’re not sure when they’re letting Tyrell out on probation. She says if she finds out that Kelly had anything to do with it, she promises her – and she hangs up. Promises her what?

Alex tells the doctor that it’s hard leaving the baby. She says Randal is trying to take him away from her, but it’s his baby too. The doctor asks if she’s sure, since she heard something about multiple partners. Alex asks how she heard it, and the doctor is married to a lawyer, who heard it from another lawyer. Alex asks if she can help. She says the baby needs to be with her, and the doctor suggests co-parenting. Alex says no, telling her that Randal only wants the baby to control her. The doctor says there’s nothing legal she can do unless Alex can come up with something else. She tells Alex she can see the baby as much as she wants to.

Marcie pops in, and the doctor asks how the baby is. Alex is surprised that Marcie is pregnant, and Marcie says this is the bitch who slept with her husband. Now she’s having Alex’s husband’s baby, so they’re even. The doctor is a little freaked, but Marcie says that Alex was bound to find out. Marcie gets in the elevator with Alex. Alex cries while Marcie smirks. Marcie tells her that she loves screwing Brad. She says longest and worst elevator ride ever – for Alex – and singsongs that she’s having a baby, saying that she thinks she’ll name it Brad. She goads Alex while everyone else in the elevator is like, wtf? Marcie announces that Alex slept with her husband, and now she’s sleeping with hers. She says she’s not a bad person; Alex started it. Alex gets off on a random floor, while Marcie shouts it’s not her stop. Why is Marcie acting like she’s five? Is this a hormonal thing?

Natalie asks the girls how they like their room, and they say they feel like princesses. She says they are. Lushion shows Natalie’s younger son his room. He asks where Joey is, and Lushion says he’s in the hospital. The doorbell rings.

It’s the paternity test woman. She needs DNA from the both of them. She says that she needs it from Natalie because of Ramses being murdered. Lushion tells Natalie that it’s because she was in the house, but Natalie doesn’t want them to have her DNA because of Eddie working at the station. I don’t blame her. She realizes that Ramses died in their new house, and gets weird. Lushion says he’ll go first. The woman says she’s also doing a paternity test on him. She tells him that they’re determining the paternity of Alex’s baby without a name. Natalie tells her to get out, and Lushion says she has to leave. She says she’ll have to report that they refused, and Natalie tells her, you do that.

Lushion tells Natalie not to come at him crazy. She says she’s going to come at Alex crazy. Lushion wonders how he got into this, and Natalie says she doesn’t know, but she’ll get him out of it. She asks if he’s sure it’s not his baby, and he heaves a huge sigh.

Ben has a headache. Julius calls, and asks how he likes the car. Ben says he hasn’t driven it yet. He asks Julius what’s up, and Julius says he’s thinking of having a party. There’s going to be a lot of Colombian candy there, and he thinks Ben should stop by. Ben asks if he can bring his girlfriend. Julius says it’s a man’s party, and Ben says, cool. Julius tells him that the price of admission is a file on Eddie. Ben is like, um, uhhh, um, uhh, what? Seriously, that’s what he says. Julius says he needs Eddie’s personal file. Ben asks why. Julius tells him that the first rule of combat is knowing the enemy. Ben doesn’t know if he can get it, but Julius has faith in him. He says he’ll try, but Julius says there’s only doing. He’s not doing something for himself; he’s doing his best friend a favor. Ben says he’ll do it.

Lots of sighing tonight. Ben heaves one, and gets up.

Kelly tells an officer she didn’t tell Travis to take her child. She wants to know why they’re not arresting him, and the officer says they’re looking for him. He asks again, and Kelly wonders if he’s hard of hearing. He gives her a tablet, and tells her to read it. She reads a text that asks Travis to come over because Justice is asleep. She says she never wrote it, and people can manufacture text messages. She asks why he doesn’t believe her, and he’s taking Travis’s word. Is it because he’s a man? She asks if she can get a woman on the case. The officer says that’s insulting. She says what’s insulting is that she has to defend herself. He tells her it’s from the phone company’s records, but she insists she didn’t send it. He shows her another one asking Travis to pick Justice up, and saying that she might have left the oven on. She says she didn’t write that. He says the record shows it came off a tower a few blocks from where she works, and tells her that he follows the law. She says okay, and starts to leave. He says not so fast. He tells her that this guy isn’t into her, and she doesn’t need to be dragging them into it. He says Travis could press charges. Kelly tells him that unless he has a warrant, she’s going home. He tells her that he has one.

Next time, Travis is free to go, Julius talks to Randal about his father’s will, and Marcie taunts Alex in front of Brad.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Captain Sandy gives Malia lessons on the tinder. Not a dating app, the small boat kind of tinder. At the beach, Hannah calls for the food, and finds out it’s coming over with the guests. She wonders if she’s going to last the season. The guests are plied with drinks when they get there. It’s no big shock that the yellow fin tuna tartare is pure artistry.

Sandy talks to Malia. She explains that it’s a learning curve, and she picks up the slack. Malia is hoping to be a captain one day herself.

Lauren is concerned about first impressions, and talks to Wes about wanting to show Hannah that she’s not some bimbo who Bobby brought to the club. Fastest beach picnic ever. In his interview, Bobby talks about being friends with Hannah, and we flash back to him telling her f-u. That’s right, I forgot. He’s a creeper and aggressive.

Hannah wants to get a belly dancer for the guests. She says she’s no stranger to theme nights, and we flash back to a couple of them, but I don’t remember the guests dressing up like monks or whatever is going on in one of the clips. I also still can’t understand a word that Wes says. He’s worse than that redheaded guy (Bryan?) from the last Mediterranean season.

Bobby thinks he’ll be a good asset to Wes, having a few charters under his belt. Adam says he doesn’t know much about tribal themes, but knows that cannibalism isn’t the way to go. The guests take pictures on deck with a gorgeous sunset in the background. The captain decides to park drop anchor near some awesome cliffs. Adam flirts with Malia while he cooks.

The guests apply their war paint. Isn’t this cultural appropriation now? There’s a bunch of stuff about shackles and the anchor, but all I understand is that there’s a problem. It’s apparently a bad one, since the captain says it could be over for them. All Max knows is that if you see the rope at the end of the anchor, you’re screwed. Bobby says in trying to impress the captain, he made a mess. In her interview, the captain says she’s not going to come down on Bobby, but they’ll talk about it after the charter.

The guests sit on the floor to eat. Another beautiful table setting with lots of gold and animal prints. Adam isn’t happy with the main dish, and throws it away. Hannah wonders what she’s supposed to do now, and Adam says give him five minutes. The belly dancer arrives. Hannah says she and Adam are getting along, but there’s something she can’t put her finger on. The guests want the chef to come up and explain the spices to them, and he almost ruins the belly dancing surprise. Wait. He does ruin it. Hannah is like, thanks a lot, although she doesn’t seem like she’s really angry.

Lauren says Bobby won’t even look her in the eye. In his interview, he thinks they’re fine. Hannah brings out the belly dancer and the guests applaud. Hannah wonders when the captain is going to realize she’s good at her job. Lauren and Adam flirt. Wes is on anchor watch, and Bugs keeps him company.

Some early jet skiing is done, and then another fabulous breakfast. Captain Sandy gives instructions to Wes about pulling up the anchor, and tells him about the mistake Bobby made. Wes tries to play matchmaker with Bobby and Malia, but in her interview, Malia says she’s good being free, and tells him to just think of her as one of the deck boys. Wes talks about his girlfriend. Bugs talks to Hannah about communication with Adam, and in her interview, Hannah explains that chefs are temperamental most of the time. Captain Sandy asks Hannah to change for a photograph, and says she’ll get the drinks for the guests. In her interview, the captain says Hannah isn’t used to it being a team effort. The guests take pictures with the crew in their dress uniforms.

It’s time to pull into port. While Lauren is finishing the laundry, there’s a huge noise. She comes out to see glass and blood in the hallway. One of the hatch ports fell open and shattered a shower door, which unfortunately exploded all over Malia. The first aid kit is called for. Bobby goes into firefighter/EMT mode. He and Hannah argue about him looking at Malia’s wound while she’s not dressed (she was washing off in the shower). He thinks Hannah has marked her territory after last season. Malia is glad he can handle the situation, but thinks he still wanted to see her nakey.

The guests talk about this being the best vacation ever, but it’s time to say good-by. The primary tells Captain Sandy it was spectacular and cool to have a female captain. These guys don’t even change before counting the money. The captain gives them performance notes, and tells them what they need to work on, saying they’ll figure it out together. The take is $15K, or $1,375 each. Captain Sandy says she’d like to take them out to dinner.

She also wants to have a meeting with Hannah, who feels like she’s being called to the principal’s office. The captain gives her a bunch of compliments and says she’s impressed. (Ah-ha! in Nelson voice.) She points out that they also have the same color eyes. Wes makes fun of Bobby helping Malia. Everyone gets ready to go out.

Wes tells us he suffers from FOMO. I don’t blame him since he has to stay behind to babysit the boat. The town is beautiful, with castles and grottos and whatnot. The captain toasts to a successful first charter. She jets after dinner, and the crew talks about relationships. Wes arrives, and the group moves on to a club. The drinking and dancing commences. Hannah dances with Malia, and says she’ll be Malia’s big sister. Bobby is afraid she’s cockblocking him. On the way back to the boat, everyone gets goofy.

Bobby tells the guys his concerns about Hannah. Wes thinks it looks like Hannah trying to hook up with Malia. I agree.

Back on the boat, Bobby tries to find out what Hannah was telling Malia. Then he follows Hannah around, asking what he told her. He starts cursing Hannah out, saying she throws him under the bus; she did it in New York with Lauren. He calls her an alcoholic, and says she won’t remember it in the morning. She asks what she’s done to him. Malia tells him that they weren’t talking about him. Hannah points out that Bobby is being aggressive, which makes him more aggressive. She asks what she said that was bad about him, and Bobby tells her get out. In her interview, Hannah says she’ll remember this conversation for a Very. Long. Time.

Next time, the primary is Mr. Skin who owns a nudie website and wants to do a naked news photo shoot, Bugs says unmentionable parts are staring her in the eyeballs, a sink backs up (I don’t want to know), and Bobby acts like a jerk yet again.

😱 Hey, how about that Abby Lee Miller? 😱

Croatia

Croatia

 

May 2, 2017 – A Triangle of Chimeras, a Tangle of Lies & a New Boat Launches in the Mediterranean

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Anna says she knew Valentin would recognize the necklace. She doesn’t remember where she got it, but realizes why she kept it. He asks if it’s a fondness for Greek mythology. She recalls the last time she asked Valentin to steal information – the Chimera Project – and says it went horribly wrong.

Sam wonders if the page of the book was deliberately hidden or the pages were just stuck. Jason says he doesn’t know, but he’s seen the chimera before. It’s freaking him out that he thinks he was meant to see it.

Elizabeth thanks Franco for helping with the boys. She sees the timeline on the table, and the new drawing. She asks what it is, and Franco says it’s nothing good.

Ava bugs Scotty, who tells her that he does have other clients. He doubts Julian is going to make bail. Ava says she’s there for her own needs, and he asks what hole she’s dug for herself this time.

Carly complains about Lucy leaving her hanging about the finalized arrangements for the Nurses Ball. Josslyn drops by the MetroCourt, needing a signature for a field trip. She asks if they’re going to pretend that nothing happened with Jax. Carly says she hates it, but the best they can do is for Josslyn to meet him in Montreal. She’s unhappy about it, but they have to accept it.

Sonny walks in, and Carly tells him to have Diane call her attorney. He says it’s not about the divorce; it’s about Morgan.

Ava says she’s not in any trouble, and Scotty asks for a minute to get over the shock. She says her optimistic viewpoint is starting to pay off, thanks to him and his advice. He thinks maybe he should become a self-help guru. She says that’s a noble idea, and he says it’s also where the money is. She says his assurance that Morgan’s pills won’t come back to haunt her was what did it.

Sonny tells Carly about the pills showing up in the evidence from The Floating Rib robbery. She says the robbers must have been questioned, but Sonny says they made a deal. Carly tells him that it doesn’t make sense. Sonny says that’s what he thought; why would Morgan bring the pills to the bar? She asks why Sonny didn’t tell her sooner, and he says he was waiting for an answer. She says even if Morgan had brought them to the bar, they wouldn’t be there six months later. She wants them analyzed, but Sonny says he already did it, and the results are in.

Sam wonders why Helena would give the book to Elizabeth if she wanted Jason to find it. She doesn’t think they’ll find anything else out tonight, but Jason feels they’re running out of time and have to deal with it now.

Franco tells Elizabeth it looks like a medieval manuscript, but Elizabeth says this wasn’t something Jake studied in school. They don’t want to ask Jake, but Franco says on some level Jake trusts him to help. Elizabeth thanks him for caring, and tells him to go ahead.

Anna tells Valentin that she kept the necklace as a symbol of what might have been. She says it’s an illusion, a dream, a glimmer of hope; something that ended too soon. She wishes she could go back, but Valentin thinks there’s no reason. She says there are moments from that night she cherished. It was magical. She talks about making love in the hotel, but he says when she was in the shower, he found the proof of him being on the kill list. She says it’s was a warning. She says he thinks he knows the whole story, but he’s wrong.

Valentin gives Anna his jacket. She wishes she’d never heard the word chimera or manipulated him out of the secrets. If he believes her or not, she would never have ordered his death. She lit a candle and prayer to Santa Teresa for forgiveness. He says she’s the patron saint of missions. Anna says her regret isn’t losing the secret of the project, but losing him. The necklace reminds her of the hearts she broke that night – his and hers.

Franco gets online and looks up the chimera. He reads the definition to Elizabeth, and she says the picture is exactly like Jake’s drawing. Jason calls. He asks if Jake has ever mentioned a chimera. Elizabeth tells him to come to her place right away.

Scotty wants to go get martinis, but Ava says she has a case for him. She says what’s catastrophic for Sonny is good for her. Carly is no longer on Sonny’s side, and it’s the perfect opportunity to get Avery back.

Sonny tells Carly that everything checks out. Morgan’s death had nothing to do with the pills. Carly says they’re going to find out why he was spiraling out of control. If one of the links in the chain were missing, Morgan would still be alive. Sonny gives her a copy of the lab report. Her phone rings, and she says it’s not a good time, but then says she’ll be there. She tells Sonny the lawyers want them to meet to divide assets. He asks if they can’t do it between them. He says she can take whatever is his. She says she has what’s his already, and plans on keeping it.

Sonny says he didn’t sleep with Nelle, but Carly slept with Jax. He didn’t cheat; she did. He doesn’t want to bring it up in court, but she says go ahead. Everything is hers; he signed it over to her. He says he did it to protect her and the kids; he can’t believe she’s holding it over him. She says she can’t believe he had Jax deported. They start to argue, and Josslyn steps in. She tells Sonny to leave her mother alone. She doesn’t forgive him for anything and can’t wait for the divorce. She says Morgan wouldn’t have forgiven him either. He says maybe not, and leaves.

Scotty says as Ava’s lawyer and friend, relax and enjoy her newfound tranquility. He says Sonny and Carly will always be loyal to each other; when it comes to the kids, they present a united front. She says it might be her chance to get Avery back. He tells her to do nothing and stay alive. She needs to stay away from anything to do with Sonny’s family.

Jason and Sam arrive at Elizabeth’s house. Jason shows Elizabeth the book. He wonders what the significance is. Elizabeth shows them the timeline.

Valentin tells Anna that he’s got to get home to Nina. Anna says she forgot about Nina, bringing my dislike for her up a notch. He wants Anna to go to a doctor, but she won’t, so he suggests driving her home. Where does he keep his car? Isn’t it at his home? Although I guess he’s rich enough to keep another car in Port Charles. He helps Anna off the docks.

Elizabeth tells Jason and Sam about the numbers on the timeline. Sam wonders why Jake would draw the chimera so close to his birthday. Elizabeth and Franco tell them about the birthday trip, and how Jake seemed like he was being told not to go. Sam wonders if it’s just an excuse. Franco thinks they’re running out of time, and Jason agrees.

Valentin says what’s an act of kindness between mortal enemies, and Anna asks if that’s what they are. The car won’t start, and Valentin thinks it’s weird since he just used it. He says he’ll get her an Uber. She says he’s stuck with her for a while longer.

Ava tells Scotty, okay, she’ll table the Avery talk. At least for tonight. He still wants to go for drinks, but she feels like she doesn’t have much to celebrate anymore. He changes her mind, and tells her that she has to buy all the rounds.

Carly tells Josslyn to count to ten and listen. Her divorce has nothing to do with Josslyn. She and Sonny have difficulties, and right now are bringing out the worst in each other, but agree that they love their kids. What he did wasn’t right, but neither one of them want Josslyn to be hurt. They hug.

Sonny goes to The Haunted Star and gets a scotch, telling the bartender to leave the bottle. A woman sitting at the bar says somebody had a bad day. He says he doesn’t like to whine about his problems. She asks if he’d rather drown them in scotch, and says that’s why she’s not married. He asks why she thinks it has to do with his marriage. She says lucky guess. He says it’s over soon anyway, and asks if he can buy her a drink.

Carly suggests that Josslyn stay with her dad for a while. She thinks Josslyn could use some distance. Josslyn doesn’t want Carly to be alone, but Carly says she has Michael on her side. Josslyn says he wants a truce, but she wants Carly to take Sonny for all he has. She says maybe she can spend time in the summer there, and Carly can come with her. Carly says she can come for a couple of weeks, but can’t be there for an extended time. She doesn’t want to use Jax as a crutch; it wouldn’t be fair to any of them. Josslyn asks if she’s going to make up with Sonny, but Carly says it’s over. Josslyn asks why she’s still wearing her ring.

Sonny and the stranger sit at a table. She says she’s visiting from LA. They talk about the beach, and Sonny says that he has interests in the Caribbean. They toast to warm water and white sand. Scotty and Ava walk in. The woman asks Sonny if he surfs, and he says hell no. Neither does she.

Franco says the detail shows that Jake has seen it before. Jason says the obvious conclusion would be that he saw it on the island, but Helena likes misdirection. Sam thinks they need a break. Elizabeth says they can start fresh in the morning, and they agree not to question Jake. Jason says whether he likes it or not, Jake thinks he has a connection with Franco, and tells Franco to do the right thing. After they’re gone, Franco wonders what that was about.

Anna asks Valentin to stay until the Uber comes. She says she doesn’t consider them mortal enemies, and asks him not to shut her out. He thinks it’s better that way. She says for what it’s worth, she’s grateful he didn’t seek revenge and turn the Chimera Project over to the DVX. He says they weren’t the only ones interested, and she asks if he turned it over to someone else.

The woman says boring stuff to Sonny about the beach. Ava tells Scotty that it didn’t take Sonny long to get over his heartbreak. Scotty says he’s getting the car, and tells her to meet him out front. Sonny tells the woman it’s been great chatting, but he has to go. He says the drinks are already paid for. She tells him good night and leaves. He takes his ring off and follows her. What? Have we learned nothing from Nelle? Ava makes a soap opera face.

Carly looks at her ring and wonders why she’s still wearing it. Josslyn returns, and they leave together.

Anna says something must have stopped Valentin, and he says don’t be so sure. If he took it further, she has to know. The Uber arrives, and he says right on time. He helps her out of the car, but she still wants an answer. She mentions that it’s nice he still has the watch, and I wish he’d jump up and down on it already. He leaves her there, and she makes an even better soap opera face than Ava.

Jason thanks Sam for her help. She says she’d do anything for him. She didn’t want to frighten Elizabeth, but whatever Helena did to him and Jake, she thinks it’s all tied together. Jason does too, and thinks the chimera is the key, and Greece is the place to start. He has to go back to Cassadine Island.

Franco says Jason can’t take it back now. Elizabeth says that Jake is important to him and Sam. She suggests they go to bed. Franco says he saw something online that he didn’t want to tell them about. According to legend, the chimera foreshadows disaster. If you were paying attention, I told you this yesterday.

Tomorrow, Nathan is happy that Maxie is coming back, Tracy has an announcement, Sonny gets busy, and Lucy gets the Nurses Ball together. I can’t wait to see how she loses her dress this year. It’s right up there with the Quartermaines having pizza on Thanksgiving. Soap tradition is everything.

If Loving You is Wrong

When we last left Maxine, the cops were running from Kelly’s house, coughing. It’s gas. An officer says someone left the stove on. Travis and Justice are nowhere to be found. Esperanza tries to get Kelly to calm down.

Commercial break with important information. The Haves and the Have Nots returns on June 20.

Peter calls for Alex, who’s in the laundry room, crying. He tells her the police are everywhere outside. Alex thinks it has something to do with her. She tells Peter to take his sister upstairs. She opens the door, and Rick is standing there. He says they’re looking for a lost boy. Esperanza tells her that they can’t find Justice, but Alex says he’s with her, upstairs. And here he is. Kelly asks why he didn’t answer his phone. He says he was talking to Travis, and Kelly tells him to never talk to Travis again, and never get in his car.

Esperanza tells Alex that Travis has been stalking Kelly, and took Justice without telling her. Alex is shocked because Travis has always been nice. Esperanza tells Rick that means nothing. Kelly wants him arrested, and Rick tells her to come to the station. She wants to bring Justice, but Alex promises not to let him out of her sight. Kelly leaves with Rick. I’m hoping Kelly ends up with Rick.

Steven asks Ben if he was in the captain’s office, but he says no. Eddie watches with as much interest as he’s capable of. Steven takes Ben into the office, and asks if he should look at the tape. He knows Pete was using the computer. Pete says he was just looking something up, but Steven doesn’t buy it. He used the captain’s code to log into the FBI website, and Steven wants to know why. Ben says Eddie told him that he works with Steven, and asks if they’re “down.” Steven asks if he wants to be fired, and Ben says do what he has to. Relenting, Ben tells Steven that he was told to find out about Claudia by Eddie. When Steven asks why, he tells him to ask Eddie. Eddie gets called into the office.

Steven asks why he sent Ben to look Claudia up. Eddie says better that Ben get fired than him. At least with Eddie, you know where you’re at. Steven says they have nothing on her, but Eddie insists she’s FBI. He tells Steven that he had a run in with Julius the other day. Julius wanted him to take out three people – Quan, Quan’s mother, and Claudia. He doesn’t know why. He says it’s his in, and he already has one down, even though he had nothing to do with it; Lushion’s son pulled the trigger. He says if he gets the others, Julius will be in debt to him. Steven says they’re loyal until they kill you, but if Eddie gets in with Escada, he wants in too. Ben asks what happened when Eddie comes out, and Eddie calls him a dumbass.

Tyrell calls his mother from prison. She asks if he’s heard from the parole board, but he hasn’t yet. He says he’s calling to tell her to stop giving Kelly a hard time. He says she’s raising their son, and he needs her to be there for him. He says Justice is doing fantastic in school, and Kelly is a good mother. He took this fall for Justice, so let Kelly take her time telling him. Diane says it isn’t fair, and she doesn’t like it. He says she’ll do it when the time is right. Diane agrees to get off of Kelly’s back. He says he’ll be out soon enough.

Randal sees Natalie getting out of a taxi and calls to her. She ignores him. He says he wants to talk to her, and tells her welcome to the neighborhood. She asks what he really wants. He says he wants to apologize, since they haven’t gotten along. She says they never will, and tells him to move along. She doesn’t know, like, or trust him. If he was on fire, she wouldn’t spit on him. He says he thought she’d want to know that Lushion has been cheating on her; he saw Lushion coming out of Alex’s house, and Alex told him they were. Natalie tells him to stop lying, and he says that Alex says the baby is Lushion’s. She says good-by; she’s not listening to him. Good move, but you know it has to be on her mind now.

Randal leaves, and Natalie strides over to Alex’s house. She knocks, and Alex invites her in. Alex asks about Joey, and says they must be moving in soon. Natalie says soon, but she’s not sure exactly when. She asks if Lushion dropped by today, and Alex says he did. Natalie asks why, and Alex asks if she’s been home. Natalie says no, and Alex says that Lushion was just checking on her. Natalie asks how long it took, and Alex says not long. She asks where Brad is, and Alex tells her that he moved out. Natalie says, so it’s just her and the kids, and Alex says yes, asking if everything is okay. Natalie says she’s fine, and she has to get back. Awkward exchange.

Natalie goes back to the new house. She sees Lushion on the porch. She asks if he went to Alex’s house today, and he says no. She keeps asking if he’s sure, and then tells him that Alex said he was. He says oh, yeah, he was. She says Alex told her he was asking about mail and he agrees. Natalie says she doesn’t like being lied to, and asks why he went over there and why he lied. He keeps trying to get her to come in the house, and she asks how many times he’s seen Alex when she wasn’t there. He asks what’s gotten into her. She asks if they’re sleeping together. He says he knows she’s tired, and he’s going to forget that. She asks if that’s because he doesn’t want to lie. She says she’ll go ask Alex herself. He says he’ll be there after she makes a fool of herself.

Natalie goes back to Alex’s house. After finding out the kids are upstairs, she asks Alex if she and Lushion are messing around. Alex asks if Randal told her that, and says she’d told him they were, but they’re not. Natalie asks why she said that, and Alex says she was in a bind. She tells Natalie about the court hearing, and how she had to think of something quickly. She told the judge she doesn’t know who the baby’s father is, and when Randal pointed out the baby is half-Black, she couldn’t think of anyone else. Natalie asks if she has fantasies about Lushion, and Alex says she wouldn’t do that to her. Natalie says she did it to Marcie. Alex says she knows it was wrong, and she’s sorry, but she’s never spent more than three minutes alone with Lushion. He came over to borrow something. She can’t say what; it’s a surprise. Natalie tells her to keep Lushion’s name out of her mouth, and Alex says she will. Natalie says people get hurt talking this kind of crap, and she needs to tell Randal the truth before it gets around. Alex promises she will, and tells Natalie she’s sorry again.

Natalie goes back to the house. Lushion has it all furnished and decorated. She asks if he did this, and he says he’s not talking to her. She apologizes. He says no, and asks if she talked to Alex, and Natalie explains why Alex said what she did. He says Natalie jumped on him because of some lies. She says she asked him a question and he lied. He shows her the candle, and says he wanted it to be a surprise. He says she’d better be glad he loves her. He asks if she likes the place. He tried to find things she had circled in magazines, and she didn’t know he was paying attention. He says they’re not exactly the same; they’re cheaper versions, and she says she loves it. And she loves him. She says she’s sorry, and he’s like, Alex? Please. His phone rings, and Natalie tells him to answer it while she looks around.

It’s Pete. Lushion says his timing is bad. Pete tells him that he was in physical therapy with a kid who got shot. He said the kid knew Lushion, and said that he’d gotten shot because Lushion was a weak officer. Then a bunch of cops came in and took him away for violating probation. Lushion asks what the kid’s name was, and Pete says Joey. Lushion asks when they picked him up, and Pete says about an hour ago, and they were taking him to the infirmary. Pete asks what’s wrong, and Lushion says Joey is his son. Pete says he’s sorry, and Lushion says not as sorry as he’s going to be when he tells Joey’s mother.

Natalie looks around and everything is beautiful. Either Lushion is really gay or had help.

Pete apologizes again, and Lushion says he’s grateful for the information. He goes in one of the bedrooms where Natalie is crying happy tears. She says it’s what she always wanted. Not for her, but for the kids. He says he knows. She wonders if they could get the girls a scholarship for a certain school, and Lushion says maybe they can. She goes into the master bedroom and sits on the bed. She suggests they break it in. He tells her that Joey is in jail, and that they picked him up from the hospital. She says, Lord have mercy, if it ain’t one thing it’s another. Boy, did she get that one correctly. He tells her it’s all right, and they’ll get through it.

Meanwhile, Kelly runs into Diane at the station. Diane says Tyrell could be coming home; they’re making his parole decision. She wants to make sure everything is ready. She has a key, and if he gets out today, she’s bringing him over. Kelly wants her key back. She says Tyrrell isn’t coming to her house. Diane says she can tell him to his face. Kelly goes in to make her statement.

Randal comes to Brad’s office. Bead wants to kick his ass, but Randal says that Brad should hear what he has to say first. He wants to apologize, but Brad says get out. Randal says he’s dropping the lawsuit, and gives him the declaration. Brad starts counting. Randal babbles, saying the baby might be Lushion’s. Brad still counts, and gets up from his chair at nine. Randal says he’s going. Eddie walks in. He asks what the hell Randal is doing there. Brad says he was just about to leave, but Eddie says he’s not going anywhere. The party is just getting started.

Next time, Eddie draws gun on Randal, Lushion has to take a paternity test, and Marcie tells the doctor that Alex is the one who slept with her husband.

Below Deck Mediterranean

We meet the new cast, and I already feel behind. The chief stew is still Hannah, so at least there’s someone I’ll remember.

Destination Croatia; yacht name, Sirocco. Captain Sandy welcomes Hannah aboard. The captain says she’s not a micromanager, but she does observe, and doesn’t want her image tarnished. Captain Sandy does a walk-through with Hannah. The cabinets need massive organization, as things fall out of them when they’re opened. Chef Adam arrives. He lives in a van. Not by the river. He’s a surfer dude, who follows tasty waves.

Bosun Wesley is next. He’ll be Adam’s cabinmate. Captain Sandy tells Adam to come to her with any issues. He asks if she’s the chief stew, and she tells him she’s the captain. She’s used to it, so she isn’t offended. Bobby is also back this season, and he has braces. Stew Lauren has already met Hannah, when Hannah stayed with Bobby in New York and Lauren dated him. Seriously small world. Bobby is hoping things won’t be awkward. Bugsy is the second stew, although her real name is Christine.

Wes and Bobby load stuff onto the yacht, and deckhand Max shows up. He wonders how hard yachting can be. Malia, also a deckhand, rounds out the crew. It turns out Bugs and Wes know each other.

Captain Sandy has a team meeting. She says she’s not an a-hole unless you don’t follow the rules. She’s had every scenario happen to her, including being chased by pirates. She seems pretty cool, but I miss Captain Lee, and hope they do another season with him.

The captain is concerned about the clean up being done in time for charter. The crew gets to know one another while getting the boat ready. Bobby chats up Malia. The captain calls for Wes, Adam, and Hannah. The primary guest is Melissa, and the group is fitness minded. They also want a tribal themed dinner. Adam thinks their food restrictions are bogus, but he’s being paid, so he doesn’t care. Wes tells us that he’s “not the most smartest of people,” and we need subtitles to even understand what he’s saying.

Hannah meets with the stews. Bugs has been a chief stew before, and Lauren grew up in the hospitality industry. Hannah says she works hard, but she’ll always have time for any issues. The captain reminds the crew of their 9 pm curfew. Bobby and Hannah chat, and we flash back to Bobby cursing Hannah out the previous season. The captain insists Hannah get to bed early. She says the reason she’s so successful is that her crew gets rest.

Bobby thinks Wes’s name is Wiz because no one can understand him. The guests arrive. Bobby says they have a bunch of cougars. Now I remember how freaking annoying he is. Captain Sandy says her crew is not only professional, but sexy. Hannah gives the tour. Very nice; lots of beautiful wood with an African theme. I like the simpler décor. Except for the gold bathroom fixtures. There’s no getting away from those. It’s time to shove off.

Bobby says this season he’s here to work, as opposed to last season when his job seemed to be not leaving Julia alone. The crew has lunch in the galley. Chef Adam uses Post-It notes to remember who has what food tolerances. Bugs is into decorating, and the guest table looks awesome. A sea/starfish theme. The guests talk about what they’re going to do while on charter. Adam tells us that Eddie Vedder’s wife once threw a live octopus at him and told him to cook it. He pried it off his arm, and ended up getting a standing ovation for the meal. The guests are served. They think the food is amazing, and it looks amazing. Hannah is getting along with Adam, and hopes he doesn’t have a dark side.

The wind is picking up, and the yacht is dragging anchor. Captain Sandy calls Wes to the bridge, and says the anchor has to be pulled so they don’t crash into the rocks. An alarm keeps going off. The deckhands get the anchors up. The captain explains about the anchorage to the guests, and tells them that they have to head to port, but tomorrow, they can play in the water. Lauren cuts herself, and Adam helps her out. She thinks he’s adorable, and decides to spend more time in the galley. Yeah, they’re always adorable until they become divas. Wes guides the captain in. Great, the guy who can’t talk. They manage to dock safely.

Croatia is absolutely gorgeous! Bobby talks with Max about having dated Lauren. Adam prepares dinner. I want to charter a yacht just to eat the meals. Another beautifully decorated table is presented. One of the guests says it’s like a piece of artwork. Truth! The food is too. Adam sneaks in extra butter. Dinner is a success. A few of the guests stay up for espresso martinis. And then late-night nachos. Hannah tells us that waking up a chef is never fun, and I take her word for it. Adam wonders what happened to the preference sheet when Hannah tells him they want nachos with everything, including meat. Hannah says, I’m a vegan, but my alter-ego is a sixteen-year-old stoner.

The captain tells the guests that they’ll be anchoring if they want to do water sports. Breakfast happens. Bugs is annoyed because Adam wants her to write down the orders, but he thinks it works well for accountability. The crew gets the water toys together, and sets up a picnic on the beach. Captain Sandy says it’s the greenest crew she’s ever had. And she doesn’t mean ecologically. She teaches Malia how to drive the tinder. Hannah thinks it’s not the time to be giving lessons, and gets irritated when she finds out the food is arriving with the guests, since she’d wanted to have it set up first. She doesn’t know whether she’ll last the season.

Speaking of this season, Bobby has a good time, Bobby flirts, Bobby argues with Hannah, on board romance, an overflowing sink, complaining guests, and helium inhalation.

yacht-sirocco

 

 

July 26, 2016 – Lulu Gets a Gun, the Haves Get Some Nots & Below Deck Gets a Good-by

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Nina brings Carly printouts from Crimson’s website in response to Jocelyn’s story. Nina says she knows they’ll find the donor.

Kristina asks if Sonny can accept a gay daughter. He says it’s a lot of information to take in. Her phone rings and he asks her to shut it off. Thank you. It’s Alexis, wondering where she’s been.

Paul sees Alexis at the coffee shop and asks how she’s doing. She says she’ll be in the front seat at the arraignment.

Julian, who is out of his mind, talks to himself, saying he’s not going to the arraignment and he’s not giving up on Alexis, claiming the haters got to her.

Sam wakes up. The guard talks to her and Jason in Greek, like they understand. Sam gets up to get some water and keels over.

Valentin says he’d like to say he’ll let them go, but he can’t, so which one of them wants to die first. Lulu is suddenly there with a gun, saying she votes for him. Valentin says he wondered when she was going to show up. She says she’s here now, so drop the gun or she’ll blow a hole in him.

Julian’s crony shows up in scrubs, telling him it’s time for his sponge bath. Julian asks about Ava, but no one can find out where she is. Julian tells No Name that he needs more of the drug.

Paul tells Alexis that they really shouldn’t be talking. He says she’s going to be called out by the bar about not taking the deal for Carrrlos and not acting in the client’s best interest, and she needs to concentrate on that. He suggests she call Diane and work on a defense before she gets disbarred.

Sonny says he’s known gay guys, but they seemed to have always been aware that they were gay. When Kristina seems surprised, Sonny says he grew up in Brooklyn and went to clubs, making me laugh. He says there’s a lot she doesn’t know about him and vice versa. I love these dad moments of his.

Nina goes over some of the messages that Crimson received in regard to Jocelyn. Carly wants to contact some people who have nothing to do with Jocelyn to thank them for the organ donation. She says they can rule out certain factors, but will need to eventually do a DNA test. Carly asks why Nina is going out of her way to help. Nina says it’s driving traffic to the website and Crimson‘s social media platform is blowing up. She says her chance of being a mother came and went while she was asleep, but at least she can help with this. She tells Carly to call it what she wants. Carly calls it doing the right thing.

Lulu tells Valentin that he might think she won’t pull the trigger. He says he has n doubt she will, but he will too and wonders if Lulu can kill him before he kills Laura.

Jason screams at the guard to help Sam. When the guard does nothing, Jason turns into The Incredible Hulk and breaks the chains that are holding him to the chair. I’m serious. That’s exactly what he looked like just then.

Paul visits Julian and says he looks well. Julian says he doesn’t feel well and Paul suggests it’s guilt. He’s there to escort Julian to the courthouse. He says it will be a dazzling perp walk, since he’s arranged for the press to be there. Julian calls it a baseless witch hunt. Paul says if it makes him feel any better, he’s just the warm-up for the main event of taking down Sonny.

Kristina tells Sonny that before Parker, she’d never felt this way about a woman. She says she thought she was just into the class, but she was really into Parker. She says she was sure Parker returned the attraction. Sonny interjects until she turned Kristina in. Sonny asks if he hadn’t seen her kissing Parker if she’d have told him the truth.

Alexis talks to Diane on the phone. She sees Parker at the coffee shop. At least people have somewhere other than the MetroCourt to go now.

Sam regains consciousness. She asks what happened. Jason says it was an old chair and he was able to break it and knock out the guard. He wants Sam to stay there, but she says they’re in it together.

Dammit! Lulu surrenders the gun and I hate her at this moment. Valentin continues to make threats. It’s always the same. Like that scene in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. If you’re going to shoot, shoot, don’t talk.

Paul tells Julian his own words are going to send him to prison. Julian says the recording was illegally obtained. Paul says, doesn’t matter, Julian is sunk. No Name comes in and says he needs to check Julian’s vitals. Paul says he’ll see Julian later and No Name shows Julian the drug vial.

Alexis acts kind of nasty to Parker. Parker says she thought they’d left things on a good note. Alexis says she hasn’t heard from Kristina all night. Parker says Kristina fine and tells Alexis they spent the night together.

Kristina tells Sonny that Alexis already knows, but not to be mad because Alexis was encouraging her to tell Sonny too. She says she can’t manage a relationship and got suspended from school, and she was afraid to tell him. He asks if she was afraid he’d turn his back on her and she says yes.

Nina tells Carly she’s not going to miss Julian. Carly thanks her again. Jocelyn shows up. Nina tells her she’s been an inspiration to her and her readers, and jets. Jocelyn tells Carly she understands they mean well, but she wants them to stop the search.

Valentin days he doesn’t want to kill them, but it’s necessary for his survival. One of the guards comes toward Dante and Lulu protests. Everyone kind of stops what they’re doing and looks toward the window where I expect Jason to come busting in like whatever superhero he’s channeling now.

I swear, I looked away for a second and Jason and Sam have everything under control and I don’t know where the blip Valentin went.

No Name is about to administer the drug when Nina shows up. She wants Julian to sign a document giving her Crimson in exchange for her silence on certain matters. She says she needs to protect the magazine if he’s convicted. He says he’s not going to get convicted, but she says they can’t be sure about that. He signs. She says he missed a spot and bumps into No Name who drops everything everywhere, breaking the vial. Nina says good thing they’re in the hospital so he can get more meds. Julian, foiled again!

Kristina says Sonny is intimidating, and he says that’s what he’s heard, but they’ll figure this out together. He asks about Aaron. Kristina says she likes him, but what they have is on the surface and she connects with Parker on another level. Sonny says it worries him that Parker was her professor and mentor, which puts Kristina at a disadvantage emotionally. He says if she wants to date women, fine, but Parker isn’t for her.

Alexis says Parker took advantage of Kristina. Parker says Kristina sought her out for closure and it became something else. Alexis says Parker seduced Kristina, and Parker says they’re both adults. Alexis asks if she took time out from her marriage and Parker says she’s getting a divorce. Alexis is concerned Kristina is a rebound. She says Kristina sees a future with Parker and she wants an end to the fantasy.

Jocelyn asks if Carly’s search is more important than her privacy. She doesn’t see why everything needs to be public knowledge, and she’s sick of kids talking behind her back and pointing at her. Carly says they need the medical information. Jocelyn says the longer she doesn’t have a relapse, the less likely it is to happen. She tells Carly that her father understands, and if Carly doesn’t knock it off, the next time she visits her dad, she’ll stay there.

Valentin has himself locked in one of the rooms basically saying something about you meddling kids. I’m very disappointed in him. Dante asks Lulu where she got the gun. She says she’ll tell him later, but now they have to get out of there. Ava says they need to move, but the rest want to wait for Jason.

Jason gets into the room. No Valentin. He looks outside. Don’t put that gun down, you idiot.

Carly says she has to do everything in her power to make sure Jocelyn’s health is safeguarded. Jocelyn says her dad doesn’t agree, and asks if Carly thought about how it might affect her. Carly says she’s the adult and it’s part of her job as a parent. She says one day Jocelyn will understand.

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! about No Name dropping the vial. Julian tells Nina to get lost and she says she won’t be visiting him in Pentenville. She leaves and No Name says he doesn’t know where he can get more. Paul comes in and says it’s time to leave.

Carly calls Nina and tells her to remove the article from the website…for now. She says she can’t get into it at this moment.

Alexis tells Parker to do the right thing and it will save her and Kristina heartache later. Parker says she doesn’t know the future. Alexis asks about what the college will think, as well as Parker’s wife. Parker says she doesn’t want to hurt Kristina and Alexis says she should have thought about that before.

Kristina and Sonny talk. He tells her he’d never give up on her and she’s his daughter no matter what. They hug and it’s a touching moment.

Carly apologizes to Jocelyn. Sonny shows up and so does Nina. Nina tells them she passed the DA taking Julian out. She wonders why Carly called off the search and Sonny is like, what? Carly explains that Jocelyn feels her privacy is being violated, so they’re going to discreetly continue the search.

Jocelyn calls her father, telling him he was wrong and that Carly called off the search.

Kristina sees Alexis at the coffee shop. Alexis says she was worried and she knows Kristina was with Parker. Kristina asks if Sonny told her and Alexis is surprised. She says she’s glad Kristina told her father the truth. Kristina wonders how Alexis knew she was with Parker. She says she appreciates her parents’ concern, but she and Parker will figure it out together.

Sonny tells Carly that Kristina came out to him.

Parker starts to write a good by letter to Kristina.

Jason tells everyone that Valentin has disappeared. They get ready to leave. Um…a boat is where? Lulu says she doesn’t want to leave Nicholas behind , but Laura says they’ll have to.

Valentin is in the tunnels, playing Pokemon GO talking on his cell phone. He says they’ll never leave the island alive.

Tomorrow, Maxie admits she hasn’t been honest, Doc says to go on without him, nd Julian asks Sonny what he wants.

** In between shows note. I’m watching Hotel Hell and I swear, in every episode of every show he does, Gordon Ramsey says, “I’ve never seen such a [insert negative adjective here] business/restaurant/cooking in all my life.”

The Haves and the Have Nots

Veronica falls back into the chair with the knife sticking out of her chest as Jeffrey calmly walks out the door. Hannah is frozen. Kathryn tells Veronica not to move and Hannah to call an ambulance.

Veronica calls Jeffrey a son of a bitch and Hannah points out that she’s cursing herself. Kathryn warns Veronica not to take the knife out. Hannah calls 911, saying someone had an accident. Veronica says it was no accident. Every time I think Tyler Perry can’t surprise me on this show, he does.

The 911 operator asks a million questions. In the background, Veronica says that her son stabbed her. She asks Hannah for the phone. Hannah says there’s no danger and just send an ambulance. Kathryn tells Hannah to give her the phone. Veronica starts yelling Jeffrey’s description. Hannah tells the operator that she just needs an ambulance. She tells Veronica they’re coming and to shut her mouth. Veronica is worried that Hannah didn’t really call.

David meets with Jim. He tells Jim he’s sorry about Wyatt. Jim says he needs to talk to Jennifer. He wants to tell her that she killed Wyatt. David says that Jennifer is still the DA prosecuting his case and he needs to be careful. He says he’ll talk to Jennifer. Jim says he can’t believe it’s real until David sees Wyatt. He wants to hear that a mistake has been made. He thanks David for coming. Jim starts to cry when the guard comes and then gets a grip.

Jeffrey goes back to his hotel room, haunted by scenes from the past. He flashes back to just about everything. It culminates with him stabbing Veronica. Jeffrey calls Candace. She’s driving and says she can’t talk right now, but Jeffrey says he stabbed his mother. Candace is worried that Veronica said something about turning them in, but Jeffrey says it was about Wyatt. Then he gets worried about Veronica turning them in. He tells Candace it happened at the Cryers’ house and that Wyatt OD’d. He begs her to meet him at her place.

Candace asks if Veronica is dead. Jeffrey says he doesn’t know. Candace tells him she has to be somewhere, but she’ll have someone leave a key to another room for him and she’ll be there in an hour.

David goes to Jennifer’s office and tells her Jim would like to see her. She says that’s not possible, since she’s preparing a case against him. He tells her to drop it. He says she gave Wyatt access to more money than he could handle and it killed him. She asks what happened to Maggie and remarks that it’s suspicious his mistress was shot at his wife’s house. He says Maggie was his campaign manager and asks if this is about Jennifer’s anger at him. Jennifer asks if he’s going to Maggie’s funeral. When he says no, she wonders why, since Maggie got further with him than she did.

Jennifer refuses to see Jim. David asks her about Wyatt’s body. She says it’s not there yet, and homicide hasn’t been ruled out. She says it’s not the first time, bringing up the Cryers’ daughter, Amanda. David is shocked. She shows him a picture of Amanda’s room and asks him how blood could splatter so far. He says it was ruled a suicide. She explains that an M. E. who’s a friend of the Cryers reclassified it as a suicide, overruling the first M.E. She says until they can rule out foul play, he can’t see the body. David says the least she can do is let him confirm it’s Wyatt for his grieving parents. She writes something down for him and says the detective will let him in.

Jeffrey calls Justin and says he needs to see him and that he’s done something very bad. Justin, who’s in bed with his wife, asks if he knows what time it is. Jeffrey says he doesn’t know who else to call and Justin says he’ll be there. He tells his wife that it’s police business.

Mitch and Benny wait outside of David’s place. Benny wonders how David could have tampered with their phones. He wants to get David back, but Mitch says he has to be clever and out-think and outplay them. He says Benny has to hit David where it hurts, the way David hit Benny in the wallet rather than physically fighting him. Mitch says he has to figure out where it would hurt for David. He asks what Benny knows about him.

Benny says David is a judge and has a son. Mitch asks how much David loves his son. He says if you find a man’s weakness, you take his power. If David’s son is his weakness, Benny has the power and should pay the son a visit. Since Jeffrey is friends with Candace, wouldn’t Benny be very familiar with him?

Justin comes to Jeffrey’s room. Is this the new room or the old room? Justin tells Jeffrey to never call his house again. Jeffrey says he thinks he killed his mother. He says he stabbed her in the heart. Justin almost seems normal here, and asks him what happened. Jeffrey asks if he’s talking to him as a cop or the guy he handcuffs to the bed. Justin says if he wanted to bust him, he’d be gone already.

Justin asks if Jeffrey was sleeping with his mother’s boyfriend and says Candace told him that he was. Jeffrey says his mother doesn’t have a boyfriend and Candace is crazy. He says that Veronica was saying stuff and before he knew it, the knife was in her chest. Justin calls for dispatch. Jeffrey freaks, but Justin is checking to see if there’s a warrant out for Jeffrey. There aren’t any and Jeffrey tells him to check about his mother. Justin tells him to wait since he doesn’t want the calls too close together. Jeffrey starts to cry and says he lost his best friend. Justin tells him it will be okay. This is freaking me out because Justin seems genuinely concerned. Jeffrey tells Justin that he wants to show him something at Candace’s house.

Blane tells David there was no crime committed, but the druggies cleaned up before they left. Geez, Wyatt’s body is still lying there in the same position as when he died. I find this extremely hard to believe. David says Wyatt is breathing and to call an ambulance. Wha-a-a-at?

Candace calls Benny and tells him about Jeffrey stabbing Veronica. She wants him to call Hannah to verify the story, but he says Hannah is pissed off at him. He asks if there’s another way and Candace says if there was, she would have done it. He says he’ll call, but not to expect anything.

Veronica keeps insisting that Hannah didn’t call. Hannah tells Kathryn that she doesn’t lie, but Veronica is so emphatic, Kathryn calls to make sure the ambulance is coming. It is. Hannah tells Veronica she doesn’t lie. Veronica calls her a perfect little Christian. Hannah says she’s not, and Veronica agrees, saying Hannah is enjoying this. Hannah says what she’s not enjoying is Veronica messing with her son. She tells Kathryn that she’s trying to find compassion for Veronica, but Veronica isn’t making it easy.

The medics come in. Veronica says her son stabbed her. The EMTs take a look. One of them says it looks like the knife got the implant. Veronica says she doesn’t have implants and they’re like, okay. When asked if she can walk, she says she has a knife in her chest. The EMT plucks it out and they walk her to the door, Veronica complaining the whole way. When they’re gone, Hannah starts laughing. Kathryn says her son is still dead and Hannah apologizes.

Benny calls Hannah. She says she’s been dealing with something and asks what he wants. He feigns innocence and he asks where she is. She tells him the Cryers’ and asks why Veronica was at his house. He said he needed to talk to her and asks why Hannah is at the Cryers’. She tells him their son died. He says he’s sorry and she says she doesn’t want hers dying over some old whore. Benny says he has a problem, but won’t tell her what it is. She sees a car pull in behind her and says she has to call him back. He asks if Jeffrey stabbed Veronica. Hannah asks how he knew that and says she has to go. He asks if Veronica is okay, but Hannah has already hung up. It’s Jennifer with a cop in the other car, and she wants to see Kathryn.

Jeffrey calls Candace, telling her that he’s standing in her backyard with Justin. That Tyler Perry! He’s a crazy man!

Next time, War sees Jim in jail, Kathryn attacks Jennifer, David tells Jeffrey to stay away from Veronica, and Oscar’s identity is revealed.

Below Deck Mediterranean

We get a fast forward version of what’s happened up until now.

After insulting Julia, Bobby gets all stupid, yelling that everyone stood up for Danny and f-word all of you. Jen finally gets in his face and Bryan takes him out of the boat they’ve been sitting in and talks nonsense to him on the sidewalk. Julia is upset and none of the girls are pleased. Hannah is pissed that Bobby wanted to bring a girl back on the boat, Bryan defended him, and then Bobby tried to make it sound like the problem was Julia being jealous. Julia is fuming and starts to cry.

The next morning, Bobby wakes up with a serious hangover, wondering what he said. Good. In the break room, Bryan says it was all unfortunate. Jen tells him he was pretty bad and even Bobby can’t believe he was so ridiculous. Bryan says he was, even though he defended Bobby. Jen is like, you’re both idiots. Tiffany suggests Bobby apologize to Julia.

In his interview, Ben says Tiffany is a cool girl, which according to Your Tango means she doesn’t bug out over no commitment.

Bobby approaches Hannah, apologizing for whatever he said and says he feels sick about it. Hannah says a lot of people would have gone to the captain, but that goes against crew code or whatever. The captain calls them to the bridge to go over the next charter. It’s a sales team being rewarded for their hard work. They have something to do with ginger beer.

Bobby asks to talk to Julia. He tells her that he’s disgusted with himself and he’s sorry from the bottom of his heart. She says it’s not true about her being jealous and it wouldn’t have been so bad if he’d just went after her, but he dragged her boyfriend into it. Bobby says she’s the last person he wanted to hurt and she says this has changed things between them. He hopes she can forgive him before the end of the charter.

Ben asks Hannah how Julia is doing. Hannah says Bobby was rude to all of them, but Ben says it was the worst with Julia. He waxes philosophical about hurting the ones we love most.

Hannah figures nothing could be worse than the last charter. Probably not, but never say something like that. It’s just asking for trouble. These guys seem pretty normal though. Ben wants to do a whole fish for lunch and Hannah thinks he’s lovable. In his interview, Ben talks about liking Tiffany from the jump.

Bryan talks about Danny and in her interview, Jen says it’s typical of his character to be talking about someone who’s not there to defend themselves. Bobby joins in on the gossip. The guests are scheduled for a beach picnic. Bryan acts like his usual d-bag self and Hannah says his ego trip is getting old. The spot they’ve picked is too windy and Captain Mark approaches the guests, who are happy with having lunch on the boat. The head guy talks about how lucky they all are and toasts to his sales team. It’s about time someone appreciated their time on the yacht.

Ben asks Julia how it’s going with Bobby. She says everyone was liquor fueled, but it was a side of Bobby she hadn’t seen. She was astounded at being singled out for attack and Ben says it’s because Bobby has the most feelings for her. And he’s in middle school.

Moving on to dinner. As always, Ben creates cuisine fabulousness. Bobby says it’s eating him up that he doesn’t think Julia will ever forgive him. Staying out of her way might be a good start.

Some of the guests sleep on deck for the last night. Hannah and Ben discuss Bryan. She says Bryan is disrespectful to women and a psycho. Ben says Bryan needs to work on things.

Fastest. Charter. Ever. Hannah says it was the best way to end the season. The envelope is given to Captain Mark. The primary guest tells Ben that if food was music, his would be Jimi Hendrix, which I’m sure Ben takes as the huge compliment it is. The crew meets in the lounge. Two thousand dollars a piece, the best they’ve done. Captain Mark says it’s a great note to end on and the owners have arranged for a beach party tonight.

Hannah talks to the other girls about Bryan’s aggression. Hannah says she’s lost all respect for him after the other night. Jen radios Bryan and asks if he’ll meet them in the lounge. Hannah talks about having her biggest argument with Ben, but it didn’t make her feel as bad as Bryan’s attack. Everyone puts in their two cents, but Bryan has an excuse for everything. Julia says it’s just advice for the future and that he should treat women as equals. In her interview, Jen says he didn’t absorb a thing and was just waiting for them to stop talking. She’s right, since he tells Bobby how stupid it was.

The crew gathers on the beach, along with Captain Mark. He thanks the crew for a wonderful season, talking about how the crew pulled together like he must have been on another boat. Ben thanks him back for being a great captain. Captain Mark doesn’t stay long, which is probably wise. Hannah says the girls were amazing. Lots of drinking happens. Hannah follows Ben to the bar. He says he’s going to miss everyone and he usually doesn’t feel that way. She tells him she loves him and he has a piece of her heart. In his interview, he says he did want to be closer to her, but he had to draw a line. In her interview, Hannah says she hasn’t felt this way about anyone else. They sort of kiss.

Oh Lord, Bobby says he can’t leave Greece without telling Julia how he feels. He tells her he feels really bad and can’t say he’s sorry enough. She says they’ve all been drunk and said things they didn’t mean. He says it’s really him who’s jealous and starts going on about how he loves her. She tells him he shouldn’t throw that word around. He says she’s been what he’s been looking for forever. She tells him he’s a “vibrant character” and he’ll find someone. They hug it out and everyone goes back to the boat.

Bryan and Bobby compare abs to see who’s more ripped. Tiffany pours a seriously stiff drink. She and Ben goof around on the couch. She suggests they go to bed. Later, Bryan says Ben woke him up for condoms and now he can’t find him. Why? Does he want them back when Ben is done? Hannah nearly walks in on Ben and Tiffany having sex in one of the lounges.

In the morning, Tiffany tells Jen about having sex with Ben. Ben wakes up on the couch still loaded and stumbles around. I laugh. Ben talks to Hannah in French while he brushes his teeth. She says she was up way late and saw and heard everything.

Julia tells Hannah about Bobby saying he loved her. Hannah tells Julia about walking in on Ben and Tiffany. In her interview, Hannah says Ben will no doubt get bored with Tiffany and maybe he’ll want a “proper woman” in five years or so. Now whose ego trip is getting old?

Tiffany says it was real, but she’s never doing this again. She’s going home to get her captain’s license. She and Ben decide to keep it weird. Julia is nice enough to hug Bobby good-by. She hopes he finds the right girl, since it’s not her. In his interview, he says he wants to be there when she breaks up with her boyfriend. Not a chance, Bobby. She would never, ever hook up with you after she saw how angry you can get. Julia hasn’t decided her next move; she’s just glad to be going home.

The bromancers, Hans and Franz Bryan and Bobby, decide to meet in Fort Lauderdale. Jen doesn’t want to hug Bryan good-by. She says she gave him multiple chances to be a decent human, but he couldn’t stop bashing her. He says maybe he spoke the truth and she tells him at least she doesn’t reek of alcohol, trying to use it to escape her problems and reality. Oh, snap! He says she has a lot to learn about being a deckhand. She tells him about Ben and Tiffany having sex, I guess because she knows he was interested in Tiffany. In his interview, Bryan says not everyone has his mentality. That’s for sure.

Bryan says good-by to the captain. He hopes to be in Captain Mark’s position one day. Ben is also going to join him and Bobby in Florida. Hannah says she’s learned a lot. She and Ben promise to SKYPE. Ben says they never really connected, but he’ll miss her.

Ben says good-by to the captain. He makes some joke about them being like Greece because they can’t…never mind.

Good night, sweet Mediterranian.

July 19, 2016 – GH, Having & Not, & a Deck Plane Ticket Home

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Why? Why when there’s “breaking news,” it’s always between 3 and 4 pm? This time it’s a crane collapse on the Tappan Zee bridge. There were no life threatening injuries. So why do we need to be hearing about this now?

Alexis answers the door to Diane who tells her it’s time for Julian’s arraignment. Diane sees the pregnancy test and asks Alexis if she’s pregnant.

Griff tells Julian there’s no reason he can’t be released into police custody, answering the question in my head. One of Julian’s cronies comes in and Julian tells him he’s not going anywhere.

Curtis and Jordan run into each other at the MetroCourt. She thanks Curtis for intervening with her and TJ. He says it seemed best for everyone to bury the hatchet and move forward. He says forgiveness feels better than carrying a grudge and maybe she should try it some time.

Dante asks Valentine why they’re being held hostage. Nicholas rephrases and repeats the question. Valentine points out his brief mention in the family record book. He says he’s disappointed and insulted and Nicholas tells him to get over it. Valentine complains that Nicholas was raised in luxury while he was raised in squalor. Nicholas says sorry, but there’s nothing he can do about that now. Valentine says he wants it all.

Jordan tells Curtis that she’s grateful and that she and TJ are going to visit Shawn. Andre arrives and Curtis excuses himself. Andre asks Jordan what’s up with TJ.

Alexis says she’s not pregnant and Diane thanks God, saying they have one less thing to worry about than they did two seconds ago. She asks if Alexis is okay. Alexis says, hardly.

Griff asks Valerie if there’s been any progress in catching the murderer. She says when it happens, she’ll probably find out on social media. Griff tells her about Julian being discharged from the hospital.

Julian’s cronie says that what he’s talking about is dangerous. Julian tells his guy to get out of the hospital, since he doesn’t want him around when whatever goes down. Griff comes in with the test results.

Diane thinks that Alexis’s pregnancy scare might have brought out some feelings. She says Julian being a vile human being doesn’t change that he’s Alexis’s husband and she once loved him.

Jordan explains to Andre that TJ learned Shawn was his father. She tells him about how Curtis stepped in to encourage TJ to make peace, and now she and TJ are going to visit Shawn. Andre says he can imagine how difficult it’s been keeping the secret, especially since she didn’t tell him about it.

Curtis and Nina sit down for lunch. He says he encountered a slight hiccup in Claudette’s room. Nina says Nathan told her about Maxie and she needs to call off the investigation.

Valentine wants Nicholas to sign over all of his assets to him. Nicholas tells him the request is absurd. He says he owes Valentine nothing. It sucks that he grew up poor, but Nicholas didn’t know about it. He says he’ll be glad to help Valentine out, but he’s not just handing over everything. Valentine replies that he can shoot the hostages one by one and grabs Ava. This is kind of a stupid plan. I seriously think his sudden good fortune would be questioned.

Valentine thinks Nicholas might be more cooperative if he picks Laura. Nicholas says he’s offering Valentine an absurd amount of money, but Valentine says he wants the whole shebang.

Nina says she wants to know everything about Claudette, but Nathan has talked her out of having her investigated. She says it’s the right thing to do and Curtis says there’s a lot of that going around.

Jordan says she doesn’t make a habit of broadcasting her business. Andre says he’d like to think they’re involved with each others lives, but instead of coming to him for support, she handled it on her own. He says if she’s not going to include him in her life, it doesn’t give them much to build on.

Nina tells Curtis to concentrate on the unethical surgeon project. He says a doctor has already put him on the trail of illegal fillers.

Oh yay, an update from Mayor Cuomo which we need like…I can’t even think of anything.

Diane says she’s thrilled that Alexis no longer has feelings for Julian because he’s going under. She says the less nostalgic Alexis feels about him, the better. Alexis gets a call from the commissioner, who wants to see her before the arraignment. Diane says she’ll come along. Alexis says she doesn’t need a lawyer for that, but Diane says she’s going as a best friend. They hug.

Griff checks Julian’s vitals. He tells Julian he suffered some kind of cardio episode. Griff says Julian is stable now, but it might be symptomatic of something else, so they’ll have to watch him. He’s ordering tests to find out what happened. What happened is, Julian fooled him.

Nicholas says he’ll sign everything over. He tells Ava he doesn’t see any other way out at the moment. She suggests that once Nicholas gives him everything, Valentine won’t need him anymore and might kill all of them anyway. Lulu tells Laura it’s okay and Nicholas knows what he’s doing. Laura jokes to Doc that he must be glad he came along. He says so far they make a great team and he thinks there’s a way out that doesn’t involve someone dying.

Alexis and Diane go to Jordan’s office. Jordan thanks Alexis for being cooperative. Diane says they’ll expect a statement from the PCPD about Alexis being pivital in Julian’s arrest. Jordan gets a call saying that there’s been a problem.

Valerie approaches Curtis and they start kissing. Nina tells them lunch is over and to go have fun.

Laura says one of the tunnels goes to the harbor. She says you can get there through the wine cellar, but if you make a wrong turn, you’ll end up in the lab compound. She explains how to get to the wine cellar. Doc says there are more hostages than guards and they can create a distraction. Geez, with everyone just milling around and the guards snoozing, they could have been out of there an hour ago.

Nicholas tells Valentine to let everyone go. Valentine says get signing. Surprisingly, there aren’t that many papers and only one place needed for a signature. After Nicholas signs the document, Valentine says he has to tie up some loose ends, starting with Ava. He aims his gun at her, but Nicholas grabs his arm. For all the years this guy had to plan this, you’d think he’d have thought it out better. Seriously, wouldn’t anyone think it’s odd that Nicholas did this? When he’s supposed to be dead? And if Valentine kills everyone, won’t that be even more suspicious?

Jordan says the arraignment will have to be postponed because Julian has taken a turn for the worse.

Dante makes Lulu repeat the directions to him. Laura is worried about Nicholas, who is upstairs, struggling with Valentine. Valentine shoots Nicholas who falls backward over the balcony. He’s getting good at that.

Tomorrow, Carly wonders whats going on between Dillon and Kiki, Sabrrrina wants to move out, Parker and Kristina meet, and Ghost Carrrlos makes an appearance.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Hannah tells Jim that Wyatt OD’d. He asks what happened, but she doesn’t have the details. She tells him Wyatt was found at a hotel, but she doesn’t know if he was alone or who found him. Jim calls for the guard. He says he needs to see DA Jennifer right now. He gets aggressive and a guard takes him down. He begs Hannah to tell Jennifer something and she says she’s not his messenger. He offers to pay her, but she says she doesn’t want his money. Hannah walks out as Jim is dragged back to his cell. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

Benny tells War that David did something to his phones. War asks if Benny wants him to deal with it, but Benny says he’ll talk to him personally. War tells him to chill out. Mitch is out in the parking lot. After blocking the entrance to the office with a truck, he puts a spare tire in War’s trunk. He goes inside and asks if there’s been any calls. Benny says no, and adds that War told him to calm down. Mitch says that doesn’t sound like War.

Benny and Mitch are about to leave and War blocks the door. When Mitch wonders what the hell, War says he was just playing and leaves. Benny and Mitch decide to visit David. War comes back and wants Mitch to move his car.

Jeffrey takes Melissa to “their” room. She thinks it’s nice, but he tells her not to get too comfortable. He asks her what it feels like to be a two bit whore and she tells him that he ought to know. She says she doesn’t want this either, but she has to take care of her parents. She tells him if he has an alternative, she’d be glad to hear it. He says he’s getting out of it. Melissa says if he can find a way out where she can still give money to her parents, she’ll take his mother down, but if not, he’d better act like she’s the hottest thing on the planet.

Veronica sees David. He tells her he’s there for his son and she tells him not to ruin the festivities. Melissa and Jeffrey come downstairs. David tells Jeffrey they’re leaving. He says he’s filed for divorce and Jeffrey isn’t safe there. Veronica says Jeffrey isn’t leaving, and Jeffrey tells David he’s staying there. David says Veronica has nothing on him now, but Jeffrey says she does. David says whatever it is, it can’t be that bad. Veronica says it is. She says Jeffrey and Melissa are moving in until after the baby comes. David tells her she’s crazy and Veronica says they’ve already established that. She tells Melissa to leave them. David tries to get Jeffrey to tell him what Veronica is holding over him. and Veronica tells him to go ahead. Jeffrey says nothing.

There’s a phone call for Veronica. It’s Kathryn. Veronica tells her she’ll be right there and tells David and Jeffrey that Wyatt is dead. David keeps telling Jeffrey to come with him. David finally leaves and Veronica tells Jeffrey first David’s bitch dies, and now his does, but he still has Melissa and the baby.

Candace meets War with the money. He asks what took her so long and she says Lloyd had to call three branches to make it happen. He asks if he has to count it and she says it’s all there. He congratulates her for coming through. She asks if they’re good, and he says he keeps his word. He says he’s sorry about all this and she says she’s sorry too. She says she should have told him about the money in the beginning and thanks him for having her back. He says she has his respect back. She asks him to call if he’s coming by. They part company. Alone in her car, Candace begins to cry.

Jeffrey asks why Veronica is just sitting there and accuses her of lying about Wyatt. He tells her he’s going to the Cryers. She says she needs him to drive her since she’s been drinking and tells him to sit down. She says he’s grieving his man, but Jeffrey says Wyatt was his friend. She says if looks could kill, she’d be dead and asks if that’s what he wants. She says it’s just as well about Wyatt, since Wyatt was ruining him. She prattles on about Melissa, obviously getting drunk, and starts talking about how poor Black girls always want to eat fried chicken and Melissa wouldn’t know a vegetable if she saw one.

Veronica gets another drink. She tells Jeffrey that when he stops his pansy-ass sniveling, they can go to the Cryers. She doesn’t want him going in all sappy. She says she’s glad Melissa is having a boy so she can have a do-over and raise a man. She says whenever she sees him, she wants to give him an ass-whoopin’ again. She moves on to how he sure got Quincy back and tells him to dry his eyes so they can go.

She calls Alice in and tells her they have to postpone the party. She also tells her to burn all of the clothing Jeffrey brought with him. She has a new wardrobe for him upstairs. She lets Melissa know they have to leave for a while. She says Alice will help her unpack and suggests Melissa take a bubble bath. She makes Jeffrey kiss Melissa, telling him that’s what feminine lips taste like.

War gets stopped by the police. An officer tells him to step out of the car. The cops have their guns drawn and he’s told to get on his knees. He gets cuffed and the car is searched, one of the officers saying they’ve heard he’s dealing again. They find the money in the trunk, along with cocaine in the tire Mitch put there. Good one, Mitch! As they take War away, he swears revenge on Candace, who he thinks set him up.

Hannah brings Kathryn something to eat, but Kathryn says she can’t. Veronica and Jeffrey come to the door. Veronica throws her coat on the floor and tells Hannah to pick it up. Hannah tells her to pick it up her damn self. I guess Veronica didn’t get the memo about Hannah quitting her job. Jeffrey joins Kathryn on the couch and starts to cry. Hannah comforts him. Veronica sits and tells Jeffrey that they’re there to show strength to Kathryn. Kathryn says it’s fine and that they knew how much Jeffrey loved Wyatt. Veronica tells Hannah that her son doesn’t need to be comforted and Hannah says neither does hers, but Veronica does it anyway. Veronica says on this side of the tracks, they’re civilized, and Jeffrey’s acting like he comes from her neighborhood. Hannah tells Jeffrey it’s okay. Veronica tells her to quit touching her son and Hannah says as soon as Veronica quits touching hers, because Veronica didn’t learn from her first remark.

Kathryn tells Veronica that she didn’t need to come; she just didn’t want her to hear it on the news. Veronica wants to leave, but Jeffrey wants to see Wyatt because it doesn’t seem real. Veronica tells Jeffrey to stop embarrassing her and get in the car. Kathryn offers to have her driver take Veronica home, and Veronica argues with her. Hannah asks what kind of mother Veronica is to treat Jeffrey this way when he’s hurting. Veronica says this is why she wanted to wait. She wants him to stop being a drama queen and get up. She harangues him, asking why he keeps looking at the bottle on the lunch tray. He tells her it’s because he wants to hit her with it. She laughs and asks what’s stopping him. He says because she’s his mother. She says real men have the heart for battle, but he’s not a real man, sitting there crying over another man. He says Wyatt was his friend. She says they all loved Wyatt, but not one of the women in the room is acting like he is, not even Wyatt’s mother.

Kathryn offers her driver again, but Veronica says she wants Jeffrey to get it. She says she’s sorry and she shouldn’t have brought him. Whoa. As she’s babbling at him, Jeffrey takes the knife from the tray and stabs her. Alrighty then.

Next time, Jeffrey thinks he killed Veronica, David asks who would want to kill Wyatt, Jim and David talk.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Ben sniffles over Julia’s criticism. Hannah hugs him and he says he doesn’t want anyone to see. In his interview, Ben says he cares about people, not where they were educated. Hannah tells Julia she struck a nerve.

In his interview, Bobby says Danny’s cell phone is like his pacifier – as we see him in the break room staring at his own cell phone.

The yacht gets to Santorini. The captain says it’s a collapsed volcano that’s difficult to dock at. He orders donkeys for the guests to get to the town. That actually fits in really well with these guests. They also have to leave in the middle of the night to get their flight back. I pray one of these people falls off their donkey, but it doesn’t happen. In town, the guests meet up with one of their friends, Marcos.

Danny shows a video of him and his sister to Tiffany. Bobby and Julia take pictures of the sunset. Bobby wishes he and Julia could be closer and share the moment. Bryan is annoyed because he can’t find his black pants. Instead of asking Tiffany nicely to help, he acts like his normal a-hole self and wonders what’s wrong with her.

Julia approaches Ben. He says they’ll talk later, but claims his mood has nothing to do with her.

The guests go back to the boat and I’m disappointed we didn’t see more of the town, which is beautiful. They bring Marcos back. It’s also his birthday. Think Ben will make another cake? Hannah asks Ben if he can turn the cheesecake into a birthday cake and he says sure. In her interview, Hannah says it seems like when you see a man cry, you have something on them, because Ben is acting so nice.

Ben tells Julia that it bothered him to be grouped in with the very people he doesn’t like and are the reason he left England. They hug it out and have some laughs. In her interview, Julia says Ben is a softie inside.

Hannah says the guests are the epitomy of money can’t buy you class, but she’s been killing them with kindness. They start the dinner with a shot. One of the guests falls out of his chair before he even drinks it, but manages not to spill a drop. After the fastest dinner ever, the birthday cheesecake is brought out.

Bryan sees Ben and Tiffany talking on the deck and acts like this doesn’t bother him. I silently cheer.

Bryan takes a picture of Danny talking with the guests while he has his phone. Danny jets to the captain before Bryan does, saying he made a mistake and needs to tell him about it. I swear, if Bryan put half the energy he uses complaining and making everyone’s life miserable into making money, he would be a millionaire. Danny claims he’d forgotten he had his phone in his pocket and one of the guests asked him to take his number.

Ben tells Bryan they’re not there to teach Danny lessons. They’re supposed to be working together and getting him though the season. He says you can’t change someone in six weeks.

The captain talks to the guys about Danny. He tells them there’s only one more charter. Ben thinks they should give it a rest. The captain asks if Danny would show his phone and Bryan and Bobby follow him to his cabin. Danny has taken the sim card out and they accuse him of the Kennedy assassination.

The primary guest is thrilled with everything and hands the envelope to Captain Mark. Hannah wishes they’d just get off the boat already.

Tip time! Captain Mark says sometimes the most difficult charters don’t give the best tips, preparing the crew for it not being stellar. It’s 22,000 euros or 1,850 euros each.

Danny says something to Bobby and Bryan about being in love with each other. Captain Mark comes in and Danny explains that he took the sim card out so the captain would know he didn’t delete anything. Bobby gets crazy, saying he’ll beat Danny’s ass. In his interview, Danny says if you don’t stand up to a bully, you’ll be bullied your whole life. Bobby acts totally insane and when Tiffany asks him to keep it down, he gets even worse.

Bryan tells Danny he’s a liability. Danny does an imitation of Bryan trying to catch him doing something and tells him he’s a child. Bryan says he tried to look after Danny, but Danny is dead to him now. Danny says the only one Bryan ever looked out for was himself. Like the big baby he is, Bryan runs to the captain and exaggerates everything. Methinks Dany will be getting a plane ticket home.

Danny says instead of helping him grow, Bryan has hindered him from being the best he can be. He tells Captain Mark that Bryan and Bobby don’t trust him and he doesn’t trust them either. The captain says he doesn’t trust Danny either and (bingo!) gives him a ticket home. He says Danny’s work has been sub-par and he’s been a liability. Bryan escorts him to his cabin to pack up.

In his interview, Danny says the bullies came out on top and it doesn’t sit well with him. Ben tells Danny he’s sorry, but he doesn’t think yachting is for him. Jen thinks he’s lucky to have stayed this long. Danny says he doesn’t want sympathy and wants to leave on good terms with everyone, but it’s not possible with everyone. He says the beautiful thing about sub-par is that there’s room for improvement.

Idiot Bryan tells Danny that the trolleys are broken, so he’ll have to ride a donkey to town. In his interview, Bryan says the trolleys weren’t really broken and Bobby watches from the boat with binoculars. I totally get why Captain Mark fired Danny, but both Bobby and Bryan have something seriously wrong with them, while Danny is just immature.

Bobby claims Danny being gone will help Bryan’s attitude. Jen agrees that Danny might have been bringing people down, but thinks Bryan has a problem all his own. Julia can’t wait to get off the boat and go home.

The crew hangs out on deck. Bobby plays guitar and gifts Julia with a harmonica. Surprise talent! They play for a while, and then she leaves to call her boyfriend. In his interview, Bobby says it sucks being rejected over and over, and apparently he’s even more clueless than I thought, since she’s told him she;s not interested.

The captain – who must be legally blind – tells Bryan he handled things well. He says Bryan is officially the first mate going forward. Bryan tells the others that his probation is over. In her interview, Jen tells him congratualtaions; he’s officially a d-bag. I literally lol.

The crew takes a trolley up to town. Tiffany is excited to hang out with Ben. Let the drinking commence! Bobby toasts to Bryan. Ben and Tiffany make out. In his interview, Ben says it’s nice to have female company and not be obligated to anything.

Bobby chats up some girl. Julia is glad his attention is elsewhere. Bobby wants to bring the girl back to the boat, and Hannah tells him to quit being an idiot. He says they can do what they want because Danny got away with murder. Hannah says she outranks him, but obviously Bryan is giving his approval. Bobby leaves his lady behind. On the tender, Bobby gets nasty with Julia, calling her boyfriend names.

Next time, it’s the last charter, Tiffany asks for advice, Jen tells Bryan it hasn’t been a pleasure to work with him, and Ben and Hannah kiss.

July 12, 2016 – Half a GH, an Entire Deck & the Whole Haves & Nots

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

GH has already been in progress for a half hour while the president said blah-blah-blah during the first half.

At the hospital, Anna rags on captive audience Julian about how he’s such a d-bag. I love that they’re just leaving her alone in his room.

Theo is surprised that Nicholas is alive. Jason suggests he talk to him personally.

At the MetroCourt, Laura talks to Dante and Lulu about Nicholas. Dante says he has to call it in immediately, but Laura isn’t certain where Nicholas is.

Ava tells Nicholas it’s clear that he did something bad, and now he’s trying to cover it up. She says in the moment, it seems necessary, but no matter how careful you try to cover your tracks, you miss something, and one mistake snowballs until it tries to take over your life. She says you dream of the moment before it happened and think you can change it, but when you wake up, that’s impossible.

Jason brings Theo to Nicholas. Theo says he’s glad to see him alive and safe.

Hayden tells Tracy what she knows about Finn’s condition. Tracy agrees to help.

Finn starts to write in his journal, but he’s too agitated. He tries making a call, but no one picks up.

Anna tells Julian about everything that’s wrong with him, and to add insult to injury, keeps comparing him to Sonny, who she defines as a good guy. She says Alexis and Julian’s children despise him now. Barely conscious Julian says it could have been Anna going to prison for murder and she’s no better than he is. She says she owned up to what she did and was exonerated. She says she learns from her mistakes, but he never has, which is why he’s there. She says she’s done with him and she’s leaving town to spend the rest of the summer with her family because she’s free and never threw her life away. She tells him how much she hates him and says everything we’ve wanted to say all along. She breaks down in tears outside the door.

Griff sees Anna slide to the floor and takes her hand. Man, Griff and Nathan have it all. How did Claudette get so lucky?

Sam gives Ava and Nicholas their shoes back. Jason has decided he wants them downstairs where he can keep an eye on them. Theo tells Nicholas his wife is very beautiful, but he says Ava isn’t his wife. He asks if Theo ever met Helena, but Theo says no; his father would bring the fish to the kitchen back in the day.

Laura suggests they all go to Cassadine Island. Dante says his first thought about Greece is no, but he knows if he says that, they’ll just do what they want anyway, and they should do this as a family.

Finn tells Roxie he’s running out of time. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Hayden and Tracy, who says they got there just in time.

Griff tells Anna she deserves a break, but he’ll miss knowing she’s there. He sits next to her on the floor and asks how it went with Julian. Anna expresses her disgust at how unfair it is that Julian is still breathing and Duke is gone. She says she’s been holding onto vengeance and calling it justice. She says the longer you carry it, the heavier it gets, but she feels like she finally let the weight go. Griff says she liberated her spirit, but Anna says she wouldn’t go that far. She says Julian has lost everything he cares about and only has himself to blame.

Amy asks Julian if he needs anything, adding that she has pepper spray and she’s not afraid to use it. It’s highly doubtful though, that Julian is going to be attacking anybody.

Griff says he’s wavered a little in his life. He says there are things in his history he’s not proud of, but Anna says regret is part of the human condition. Griff wonders what Duke would think of him. Anna says he’d love and accept Griff with open arms and heart. She talks about how Duke would want to build a relationship with him and Finola Hughes is so believable, I almost start crying. She tells Griff she’ll see him when she gets back and not to take off and reinvent himself again. They hug.

Hayden tells Finn she had to call in the cavalry, meaning Tracy. Tracy says she considers Finn a friend, but friends ask for help when they need it. She asks Finn what drug he needs. He says it’s illegal in this country and explains they need a drug mule. Tracy volunteers herself and Hayden.

Dante tells Lulu he’s not doing this for Nicholas, but for her. Laura calls Doc and tells him she’ll be out of town to find Nicholas, but doesn’t want to give him too many details. She says his friendship has meant everything.

Jason tells Sam he wants to keep an eye on these people. She says Nicholas isn’t going anywhere, but Jason says that’s not who he’s worried about. We see Theo’s tattoo again as he looks over the family history book.

Tomorrow, Elizabeth questions Franco, Hayden has a problem with being a mule, and Finn tells Griff to mind his own business.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Kathryn asks if it’s happening again and Hannah tells her it is. Kathryn cries about how unfair it is. She thinks she’s being punished for covering up Wyatt’s hit and run. Kathryn brings up something Hannah said to her ages ago and Hannah tells her to get some rest. Kathryn says it won’t help because Wyatt still won’t be there when she wakes up. Hannah tells her she does believe we reap what we sow. Kathryn asks if that’s why Wyatt died. Hannah says this is why she didn’t want to have this conversation right now, but we get back what we put out there. She doesn’t think God took Kathryn’s children away as punishment, but there’s a reaping coming. She says if you plant an apple tree, you can’t be surprised if apples grow on it. Yep.

Kathryn says there are apples all around and Hannah suggests they not do this now. Kathryn thanks her for coming. She wonders who’s going to tell Jim, and then asks Hannah to tell him. She says there’s no one else. Hannah says she’s not doing that and I’m also thinking Kathryn is asking too much. Hannah says Kathryn should do it, but she says she can’t even look at Jim. She begs Hannah to tell him. Kathryn says Hannah is a child of God and represents compassion and Jim sees that. Hannah is aghast that Kathryn would ask such a thing of her. Kathryn starts to beg. She says she doesn’t want him to hear it from the DA or another prisoner.

Warlock wakes Candace, telling her time’s up. She says she’ll get the money today. He says when the clock strikes five, she’d better have it in cash. She says she can’t get cash and he gets abusive.

The phones still aren’t ringing at Benny’s tow yard. Mitch asks how well Benny knows War. He thinks there’s something wrong with him. Benny calls David and leaves a message to call him back. Mitch wonders if Candace and War are hooking up, but Benny says War is like family. Benny says if the phones aren’t ringing in an hour, he’s paying David a visit. Mitch says he doesn’t want to go into business with War. Benny says War has had his back, and Candace’s, and he’d be in jail if it wasn’t for him. He tells Mitch that War would die for either one of them and to back off. It was like they were having two different conversations there for a while. Benny says if Mitch wants in on the business, that’s cool, but War is definitely in.

Warlock enters. Benny asks if he’s going in on the business. War says he wants to observe, and Benny says it’s a slow day. Mitch says he’s going out for coffee. Benny offers War a seat. War has a serious face and I’m not sure why he’s not making Benny nervous or at least curious.

Jeffrey visits Candace. She gives him his new phone. He tells her about Maggie, but she’d already heard about it. Candace goes upstairs and the phone rings. It’s Justin who wants to see Jeffrey. Jeffrey says he’s busy, but Justin insists.

As Candace is leaving, Mitch is coming up the walk. He wants to know what’s going on, but Candace says she can’t talk right now. He says just tell him and Candace says she owes War money. He offers to give it to her, but she says he doesn’t have that kind. Mitch mentions his brothers and Candace tells him not to get them involved and asks if Benny knows about them. Mitch asks if War is raping her for the money and she says no. She thanks him for caring and he says he always has. I like Mitch. I’m assuming his brothers are in the Mafia or something though.

When Candace leaves, Mitch calls someone. He asks if they still have a narc cop on payroll. He tells whoever to set War up.

Jeffrey gets to his mother’s house and sees someone cleaning the blood off the walkway. Veronica, who has a rockin’ new hair-do, hugs him and critcizes his wardrobe. She tells him she wants him to go home and change, but she wants him to see his room first. He says he’s not moving back in, but she doesn’t hear that and calls for champagne. I love Veronica. She is so on another planet. An evil, twisted planet.

Veronica shows Jeffrey the room. With a crib in it. She says that’s where he and Melissa are going to live. So, in that huge house, she can’t make a separate nursery? She asks if Jeffrey wants champagne and he asks if she remembers Maggie was murdered there yesterday. She says she heard someone was also murdered at Candace’s place. She asks if he’d like to talk about that or the wedding. Jeffrey chooses the wedding.

She tells him to wear a black suit when he comes back tonight. She says she invited his father and hopes he comes because it’s a festive occasion. She says, “Happy time, happy, happy,” like a full-blown nut.

Lloyd has Candace sign the papers. She wants to read them and he tries to rush her. She tells him she needs the money in cash. Lloyd is like, wh-a-a-at? and says that kind of money has to be ordered. Candace says she needs it in cash by five. He says he’ll call some of the branches and see what he can do.

Justin, in bed with Jeffrey, tells Jeffrey to uncuff him. Justin says Jeffrey is angry today, and does his usual he’s not gay riff. Jeffrey says he’s not going to see Justin again. He says he doesn’t like it. Justin says he can’t just start this and then stop it. He says Jeffrey has said a lot of things that make sense to him. Jeffrey says Justin is a sick man and to just get out. Justin says Jeffrey is temperamental, just like a chick, and Jeffrey says at least he wasn’t screaming like one. Justin grabs Jeffrey’s throat and Jeffrey says go ahead. Again, Justin asks what’s wrong and Jeffrey tells him to get out. Wow. Justin almost seemed human in that scene.

WTF? Does Candace have a camera at Benny’s office? She’s looking at her phone and sees War there with a gun. She calls War and puts Lloyd on the phone to tell him the money is coming in and they’re working as fast as they can. He asks for Candace again and asks her what she’s trying to pull. She pretends they’re going on a trip to Vegas together and he’s some kind of promoter.At the tow yard, War makes up something about the call.

Justin says he’d thought Jeffrey was a good guy. Jeffrey says sometimes people make you change. He thanks Justin for being one of them. Justin leaves.

Candace calls War and says the money is in. She asks him to meet her at the bank. He fingers his gun.

Ha-ha! Jeffrey shows up at Veronica’s in a purple flowered suit. She asks if he’s afraid of her and he says she knows he is. She says it must not be too much, since he showed up in something that looks like a dress. She says she should send him back home, but instead gives him the ring for Melissa. Veronica wonders where David is and says he hasn’t been taking her calls.

Melissa arrives. Veronica says she’s not showing yet, which is an understatement, making me wonder if she’s really pregnant. Veronica tells Jeffrey that when a lady enters the room, he’s to stand, and he asks where the lady is. Ouch! Veronica tells him to kiss Melissa and he pecks Melissa on the cheek. She tells Jeffrey to show Melissa their room while she checks on dinner.

Jim is brought to the visiting room. Hannah tells him she’s there for Kathryn. She says it’s about Wyatt. Jim thinks she’s there to curse him out or watch him fall apart. He says it’s not going to happen. He goes on about other theories and the lawsuit. He asks if she’s going to take it all and asks what she wants. Hannah says she’s there at Kathryn’s request and that Wyatt is dead. She says Kathryn couldn’t tell him herself and she didn’t want him to hear it from someone else. She tells Jim that Wyatt OD’d.

Nwzt time, Jim offers hannah money, veronica forces melissa on jeffrey, and Melissa offers to help Jeffrey take Veronica down.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Captain Mark tells Hannah that the guests are “perceiving” her displeasure with them. She tells the captain that she’s been professional, but the guests are vulgar, disgusting and rude. Now tell us how you really feel. The captain suggests having Tiffany and Julia pinch hit. He says it’s just a personality thing and not a level of service issue, so it’s all good.

Word gets out about the guests extending their charter. Hannah lets the other stews know they’ll need to fill in for her.

Bryan has Danny and Bobby clean something or other. In his interview, Bryan calls Danny a turd burger because he’s incredibly mature. The guests wonder what the crew must be doing while they’re hanging out needing drinking supplies. For one thing, cleaning up the guests’ disgusting messes. I’m not even going to tell you what Tiffany found. Greek snacks are demanded, and I’m not sure if Ben even knows what that means. Julia takes the guests’ drink orders. One of the primaries says she’s nice in a hateful way. In the galley, Julia says it would be nice if they’d say please and thank you.

Danny wants his phone back, but Bryan isn’t too receptive to that. Julia asks Danny if he actually works, as he leans up against the washer, watching Julia and Tiffany doing the laundry. Julia says every time she gets near the guests, they want something else and Hannah thinks they might run out of vodka. Ben is getting testy.

Hannah says the guests wouldn’t know five-star service if it smacked them in their Botoxed faces. From the looks of one of the bathrooms, they’re a bunch of slobs. It’s anchors away and Danny asks Captain Mark if he can have his phone back, promising to keep it in his cabin during work hours. The captain is okay with it, making Bryan livid.

Surprisingly, the guests go to bed when they get back from a night out on shore. One of them makes plans with the captain for the next day. Hannah and Ben talk. The captain tells Bryan that the guests want ATVs for the morning, which means they have to go back to where they came from because it’s the only place that has them.

Julia talks to her boyfriend and says she can’t wait to get off the boat. She tells us that people think yachting is glamorous, but it’s a sixteen hour day and she doesn’t know how much longer she can keep it up.

The captain tells Bryan and Bobby that the guests have requested designated drivers for tomorrow, and they plan the logistics. Julia asks Bryan if he can get croissants from the local bakery for one of the guests. Jen is getting tired of the Danny thing and says he’s like a sinking ship that you don’t want to get too close to. Julia orders breakfast burritos from Ben, but in the meantime, Bryan has come through with the miracle croissants, which only one guest wants now. Why not have both?

In his interview, Bryan says something about Jen and Danny being like farts in the wind, like he’s Confucius. Ben thanks Bryan for the croissants. Julia starts talking about how one of the guests wanted them and suddenly she and Ben are arguing. I think it’s really about something else though, because Julia starts to cry.

Hannah tells Julia to breathe and that everything is fine. Ben tells Jen he can’t figure out what the big deal is. Julia tells Hannah she’s tired of people taking advantage of her because she’s nice.

Breakfast is served. Julia says she doesn’t get Ben’s ups and downs. She thinks he acts condescending toward her because he comes from a different, more educated class than she does.

Captain Mark tells Hannah he needs one of the stews for the excursion. Tiffany tells Bobby about what happened with Julia and Ben. She seems to encourage his unwanted flirtation with Julia, which isn’t very sisterly. Bryan tells Danny he’s going to be one of the drivers, but his phone stays on the boat.

Bobby approaches Julia. She tells him thanks, but she’ s okay. No surprise, Danny enchants the guests. He, Bobby, Ryan, and Tiffany are the drivers. The ATVs go up a humongous hill and it looks like stunt driving to me. Danny is miffed because the other two guys take pictures with their cell phones.

Ben tells Julia she’s confusing him and wonders why she created an issue in the galley. She says she heard him talking to Bryan about the croissants and that he uses his intelligence to put people down. She says he’s the kind of upper crust person she tries to avoid in England. Ben says she’s overtired. Julia says he’s constantly overreacting and she’s tired of his arrogance.

Ben doesn’t feel right about how Julia is looking at him. He says he grew up privileged, but didn’t want to rest on his laurels because that’s not how his father taught him, and that’s why he left England. Tiffany thinks Ben is just being funny, not condescending.

On land, the group goes to a bar. Bryan frowns, seeing Danny look at one of the guests’ phones. The captain calls, trying to move things along. Danny only has one female ATV passenger and gets her number. Back at the boat, Bryan desperately wants to say Danny screwed up, but he didn’t, so it’s killing him.

The boat docks for the evening. Dinner is served. Danny shows Jen a calendar one of the Tilted Kilt girls sent him and Bryan rolls his eyes. There is constant cleaning behind the scenes.

After the guests go to bed, Ben talks to Hannah about Julia. He says he’s more sensitive than people think. Hannah says maybe Julia isn’t used to working with his kind of personality. He whines that it doesn’t mean he’s the worst human that ever lived and Hannah says no, that was Hitler.

I have the sudden desire for a croissant. Ben is having the feels about the issue between him and Julia. He tells Hannah it hit home. He says being privileged and educated has worked against him. He’s just an everyday person with an accent and everyone takes him for having a silver spoon in his mouth. Ben starts to cry and Hannah hugs him. Well. Ben says he left home young and did everything for himself. He can’t believe he’s crying and neither can I.

Next time, we visit Santorini, the crew has a night out, Danny gets caught with his phone, and Bobby and Julia argue.

July 5, 2016 – GH, Charm Ends, Deck Sails & the Haves Crumble

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Hayden is back at Finn’s cell with his works. He says he can do it himself this time. Finn says he made it through the night because of her.

Spencer is having a 4th of July luncheon with Laura and Doc. Laura wonders why he’s in such good spirits, and he says Nicholas would want him to soldier on. I might add that he’s wearing a gigantic USA flag-patterned Uncle Sam hat.

Nicholas brings Ava to the main villa on Cassadine Island. He tells her they have the entire compound to themselves and no one will find them. He says it’s a shack compared to some of the places the Cassadines own in Russia and shows her a gigantic book with the family history. Ava says she dreamed of being a princess when she was a little girl and she’s a bit jealous. Nicholas tells her not to be; they mostly just look good on paper.

Sam is still in London. She meets Jason at a pub. She checked in with her mother and Monica, and they told her to go ahead and stay.

Ugh! First nuNicholas and now nuMaxie, a brunette no less. Maxie is having lunch with Dillon and suspects he’s having girl trouble. She says it shows like a visible panty line.

Morgan and Kiki are on a picnic. Kiki reveals her bikini top and also her bullet scar, which I’m glad they made a big deal about because I thought it was bug bites. She covers back up, seeing Morgan’s reaction.

Nathan says Dr. Mayes death has been ruled a homicide. The same drug was found in his system as the patients who recently died. Since Elizabeth found the body, he questions her. She tells him Franco showed up after she found Mayes.

Obrecht is going nuts about all of them, mostly her and Franco, being under suspicion. She asks him if he needs an alibi, but he wonders if she’s the one who needs it. Franco thinks maybe they should be more concerned about a murderer walking around who has no motive. Griff says the motive seems obvious.

Morgan puts sun tan lotion on Kiki’s back – as she thinks about kissing Dillon.

A girl named CJ approaches Maxie. Maxie introduces her to Dillon. She’s there for a graphic designer interview. Dillon excuses himself. OMG – CJ is Jessica from One Life to Live. I sat behind her once at Shakespeare in the Park. We were seeing the musical of Two Gentlemen of Verona starring Rosario Dawson and Oscar Issac. Her castmate, Renee Elise Goldsbury, who recently won the Tony for Hamilton, was in it as well. How was that for digression?

Finn starts to feel better and thanks Hayden. Tracy enters because there’s no security whatsoever at the jail. She says she’s the bearer of good news and tells him about Mayes’s murder.

Griff says it seems like an angel of mercy scenario, but Obrecht says Bobbie and Lucas weren’t infirm. He says that blows his theory. Griff points out that Finn was in jail at the time of Mayes’s murder. Obrecht wonders if it could be Griff, but he says the worst thing they can do is start pointing fingers at each other. He leaves and Franco wonders why Obrecht is overly concerned. It flitted through my mind that Obrecht might be the culprit – I could see her killing patients for a higher purpose – but Bobbie and Lucas threw me off there too.

Maxie interviews CJ, going over her resume. They discuss how Nina turned Crimson around and CJ says she’d love to be part of their creative process. She notices Maxie’s engagement ring and Maxie shows CJ Nathan’s picture. Maxie thinks she’s right for Crimson and I think she’s Claudette.

Finn is surprised at Tracy calling Mayes’s murder good news. She says for Finn, it’s spectacular, and points out that he must be off the suspect list. He says that’s not the reason he’s in jail. She says she’ll have a team of lawyers negotiate his release immediately.

Nathan questions Franco. Franco says he’d been in the cafeteria. He heard Elizabeth screaming, and when he got there, Mayes was already dead. Nathan wants the cafeteria receipt, but Franco says he has a barter system with the staff and was there after hours.

Obrecht tells Elizabeth to get back to work .Elizabeth says she is working and Obrecht isn’t her boss anymore. Franco comes to the desk and Elizabeth asks how it went.

Jason tells Sam about what happened at the shed with Hux’s henchman. He says now he has to figure out a new way to find Nicholas.

Laura and Doc leave the table. Laura thanks Doc for examining Spencer on the QT. Doc thinks maybe they should tell him he’s being examined. Nicholas calls Spencer.

Dillon comes back to the table. Maxie hires CJ. This ought to be good. Not too comfortable for Nathan though.

Morgan tells Kiki things will be different now. He can’t party or drink or be too crazy, and he doesn’t know how fun that will be for her.

Finn doesn’t think Tracy can get him off, but she says don’t underestimate ELQ lawyers. She goes to see about his release. Hayden asks how he’s gong to get his medication if he’s not at the hospital. He says he’ll have his supplier reroute it. She offers to continue to help, but he says she’s done enough.

Nathan asks Obrecht for the schedules.

Sam says Ava has to return to his daughters some time, and that Nicholas will have to send for Spencer. She thinks they should retrace their steps, but Jason thinks they should check Cassadine Island. Duh.

Spencer chit-chats with Nicholas. Nicholas tells him to pack one bag when he goes home and be ready to go at any time. Laura overhears him saying “father” and wonders what’s going on. Spencer says he calls his father all the time, calling his voicemail so he can hear Nicholas’s voice.

Nicholas goes to get food and Ava hears a noise.

Sam says Nicholas must know that Cassadine Island would be the first place to look for him. Jason says as far as Nicholas knows, everyone thinks he’s dead. Sam says it’s a fortress, but haven’t they broken in there before?

Maxie asks CJ if she wants to come to the fireworks, but she says she’d rather prepare for the first day at her new job. She leaves and Dillon says CJ seems perfect for the magazine. Maxie suggests she might make a good girlfriend for him. He says he doesn’t want to mix business with pleasure, but Maxie thinks it’s really about Kiki.

Morgan says no matter what, he’ll stay stable, and he wants Kiki to know he’s there for her. They kiss.

Finn gets released. Tracy tells Hayden since Finn thinks she’s a decent human being, she’ll endeavor to do the same. Finn suggests they go eat something, but Tracy says she’s off to work on getting Finn reinstated.

While Nathan is talking to Griff, he gets an emergency call. A mystery woman has left a message for him to go to the MetroCourt immediately about police business. He thinks it’s Maxie and I think I’m right about Claudette.

Elizabeth asks Franco how he showed up just when he did and Franco says because she was shouting. He adds that he didn’t kill anyone and asks if she believes him.

Tracy approaches Obrecht and tells her that the prosecution of Finn stops now. Obrecht says since he refused to take the drug test, he had to be suspended per hospital rules. She tells Tracy that all his work had to be destroyed as well, because of his work with infectious diseases. Tracy is livid.

Finn and Hayden are having lunch. Finn gets a call.

Ava calls out to Nicholas, but gets no answer. She picks up a fireplace poker and Nicholas walks in behind her. She says she heard a door slam and he tells her it’s just a draft. I’ll bet it’s Hux. Or Jason. Nicholas tells her to sit down to a 4th of July feast and she gets bummed, remembering it’s a holiday. And they sure don’t celebrate it over there.

Elizabeth is juggling a bunch of sodas and food at the fireworks. Franco helps her and she asks if he wants to join her and the boys

Tracy tells Obrecht that there are grounds for unlawful suspension. She says she’s getting Finn reinstated immediately.

Finn says the call was nothing, but Hayden says clearly it was something. He says since he was arrested, there’s been a problem with customs and his medication.

Doc tells Laura that it’s normal for a child to try and reconnect. She says for a moment, she really believed he was talking to Nicholas.

Ava says she never thought she’d be having a 4th of July picnic in a haunted mansion. Nicholas tells Ava that the mansion isn’t haunted; ghosts are afraid to be there. He asks her to check out the wine cellar with him. As soon as they’re gone, Jason and Sam walk in.

Nathan goes into the room at the MetroCourt. Yep, I was right. CJ is there and he calls her “Claudette.”

Tomorrow, Sonny is worried about Alexis, Claudette tells Nathan there’s something he needs to know, and Alexis asks Julian if he’s going to confess.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Bobby feels badly about kissing Hannah, since his feelings are stronger for Julia. What’s wrong with this picture? Oh yeah, Julia made it clear she has a boyfriend and isn’t interested in him.

The captain orders a MediVac to get Danny off the boat. Nothing they’re doing is bringing his fever down and he needs real medical attention. Regardless, as Ben says, the show must go on, and he makes more fabulous food. Bryan updates Jen as to what is going on, and she’s going to accompany him to the mainland.

The jeweler has arrived! He has some interesting pieces, although they’re a little big and chunky for me. Julia and Tiffany set a gorgeous table for dinner. Lots of drinking and revelry, although much more reasonable than most of the charters. No foam parties or anything. The guests request that the captain join them for dessert. It’s some kind of lemon coconut thing that looks like a dream. Captain Mark says he enjoys interacting with the guests on a limited basis (i.e. not making out and taking pictures). We find out that he’s been married for 16 years. The way we find this out is when he says he just celebrated his 16th anniversary, and then Linda, the primary, asks him how long he’s been married. Hannah says at least this group is super polite when they’re drunk.

Bobby (which I almost typo-ed as “Booby,” which might be more accurate) hopes Danny is fine, but says things are a lot quieter without him. From the preview before the commercial, it looks like the next group of guests is going to make up for all the quietness and politeness.

Jen and Danny come back. He has gastro-something. He’s is on antibiotics and goes back to bed. Bryan shows Jen how to do knots his way again. Bobby and Ben discuss whether Danny should get tipped for this charter or not. The general consensus is, no work, no tip. Ben tells Danny he should forfeit his tip before the fact, so he’ll look a little better. Even though he hates not sending money home, Danny tells the captain that since he caused more work for the crew, he’d like to forego the tip, and the captain says he’ll take it under advisement. Everyone is sad seeing the guests leave since they behaved like humans and treated the crew likewise.

The captain tells the crew about Danny’s forfeiture. The tip is the largest so far – 20,000 Euros – 1800 USD each.

The next charter is a group of friends who have been together for years and expect five-star treatment. They want a theme costume party and Hannah suggests a Venetian party. Captain Mark asks how the communication has been going with Hannah and Ben. They’ve come up with a system and everything is copacetic…for now. Wow. No break this time between charters.

Danny surrenders his phone. Julia and Ben talk about their backgrounds. Julia says she could tell that Ben came from a privileged and educated background. She says that private school boys have an air of self-righteousness about them, but I figured he was like that just because he’s a chef. Bryan checks to see if Danny has his list. Both he and Bobby pick on Danny even though he’s still not totally recovered. Bobby goes on about how Danny got his phone taken away from him and Danny just wants to get back to work. Danny complains to Ben about the list thing and Ben tells him to try to avoid any conflict. Danny says he’s going to have to be fake, which he hates.

The guests arrive. Hannah thinks they look high maintenance and misses the last guests already. She gives them the tour. She says normally it takes less than ten minutes and an hour into the charter, she’s over it. She’s having difficulty getting them to listen to any safety instruction. Ben tells her if they stick together and be cool, they’ll get through it.

Tiffany compares the charter to a frat house. Yep. And totally undeserving of the amazing snacks Ben has created. Okay, one of the guests is down already, having slipped off of the bar and onto the floor, so drunk that she can barely make it to the lounge chair. She asks Tiffany to help her get to the cabin to put on her bikini. One of the primaries complains that the trouble with drunk guests is that they take attention away from the rest of them.

Hannah has to tell Ben that only one guest is still moving around and some of them might not make dinner. Once again, I think, all the wrong people have the money. Danny asks if he can go on a jet ski and check out some caves since the guests are down for the count. Bryan asks if he thinks he’s at Club Med.

The first guest who comes back to life asks for a drink and in her interview, Julia is like, he just got done sleeping the first ones off. Bleh. The guests that are lucid sit down for dinner and put on their Venetian masks, demanding more vodka. They keep hassling Hannah. In her interview, she suggests one of them should just tattoo “dickhead” on his forehead. They’re all more interested in alcohol than food.

Bryan bugs Jen about the knots again. He wants her to tie one right now. She says she might not be the best deckhand he’s had, but neither is he the best first mate she’s had. He says at the end of the day, she works for him though. She tells him she’ll get the knot thing, and doesn’t need his help.

The guests are pretty disgusting, with one guy sitting there swilling liquor and shoving food in his mouth while he’s not wearing a shirt. Seriously, no way would I spend this kind of money to be an a-hole. You can do that for free.

Bryan tells Bobby about Danny asking to go exploring and says they should have gotten rid of him in the beginning. Bryan complains about Jen next. At the same time, Danny and Jen confer. Danny says he hopes his work will speak for itself. He’s bummed that he’s cruising the Mediterranean and can’t take any pictures. Maybe he should get a disposable camera the next time they go to port. He says if you don’t have any picture to post on social media, it’s like you didn’t do it, and that makes me sad.

Julia brings the guests breakfast. The guests make fun of her accent. Nice. If that was me, they’d be wearing that omelette. In her interview, she wonders if they realize she’s right in front of them. Here’s news for you, Julia, they don’t care.

One of the drunks guests asks the captain about going ashore to do a hike. Frankly, I’m not sure he’s in good enough shape to hike to the bar a deck away. He tells Captain Mark that a couple of the drunks guests aren’t getting along with Hannah. This seems like a weird time to bring this up, since she’s having the other two pinch hit for her. The really good news is, they’re extending the charter for two more nights.

The captain calls Ben, Hannah and Bryan to the bridge to tell them. He tells Hannah the drunks guests have perceived she’s not into them. She says they’re vulgar and disgusting, and she can only be pushed so far before it’s apparent she’s not thrilled.

Next time, Julia calls her boyfriend, Danny goes hiking with Bryan who takes pictures with his phone, Julia confronts Ben about his condescending attitude, making him cry. What?

Southern Charm – Reunion Part Two

Andy asks Kathryn if she wants to clear anything up about her relationship with Thomas. She says she only wants to have peace and co-parent in a sane manner, and thinks his offer wasn’t fair. She says she did a detailed budget and it doesn’t compare to what he’s offering. Thomas counters with hus desire to do more than what’s fair and says she’ll be comfortable. Kathryn surprises us by saying that at one point, Thomas designed a ring. When asked by someone on social media why she doesn’t work, Kathryn says she’s been putting together some vintage jewelry pieces. She says one of them is the necklace she’s wearing, which I gave her props on last time. Landon laughs because she’s an idiot who doesn’t have a creative bone in her body.

They discuss the polo match. Andy asks why Kathryn was so upset. Kathryn says she saw an old Thomas enabler, who she felt was inappropriate to be around Kensie. A viewer suggests she faked a pregnancy complication to get him to co-sign on the house, but even Thomas disagrees. Landon still thinks she’s a psychopath trying to manipulate all of them. Andy points out the plethora of negative social comments Landon has gotten. Craig says something so complicated to justify what Landon says, I can’t even comprehend it. Thomas says he has a Downs Syndrome brother and he’s proud that Kathryn decided to carry the baby to term despite there being complications. Craig thinks Thomas and Kathryn are going to end up together and Shep compares them to Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. Huh?

Jennifer joins the group. She’s pregnant with her first child. They joke that the father is Thomas. She talks about how supportive Kathryn has been. Andy asks how they became friends and she says the three of them were close friends in the beginning. She explains that she went out with Thomas a couple of times when Kathryn and Thomas were broken up. Andy asks if they slept together and Jennifer tells him that she’s never going to answer a question like that. Shep brings up that the implications with Jennifer don’t bother Kathryn, but she’s bothered by Landon.

Jennifer says the way Kathryn reacts might not be right, but Landon definitely likes to push her buttons. Jennifer says she can’t say she’s not involved with Thomas and then post pictures that are incendiary. Kathryn says her problem with the whole thing is that it’s intentional. The women all start talking at once and Andy moves on.

Andy brings up Thomas being a bully to Jennifer at the party. He suggests Thomas can be more hormonal than Kathryn. Jennifer says she didn’t call Kathryn to upset her, but to absolve herself. Andy brings up when Thomas tried to put the kibosh on the Kathryn/ Jennifer friendship. Jennifer says she didn’t realize that Thomas had made an ultimatum, and Kathryn says she felt pressured to placate him. Jennifer says it hurt her feelings, but if it meant Thomas and Kathryn’s relationship would do better, she can live with it. Thomas says that he has a lot of respect for Jennifer now. Jennifer tears up. Thomas gives her a hanky. (Ha-ha! Spellcheck would like to change that to “honky.”) She says the support means a lot since the only thing that matters is her child. She says she understands now about Kathryn being emotional when she was pregnant and Thomas trying to keep her calm. Andy asks if she has any final thoughts. She says both Kathryn and Thomas work well together when they try and care about their kids more than themselves.

Exit Jennifer and on to Whitney. He says he’s main base is in Los Angeles now. Andy asks about Larissa. He asks about them breaking up, but Whitney uses the euphemism “taking a break.” He says he’s hoping for the best, but he doesn’t know. That’s vague. Andy asks how the friendship with Thomas stands. Whitney says he hears more from Thomas when he and Kathryn aren’t together, but they’re still bros.

They talk about the Southern dinner party from hell. Thomas tries to use the word pandemonium and can’t pronounce it. Kathryn says there was definitely a grain of truth in what Thomas said. Thomas explains that while he didn’t invite Whitney, he invited Landon in hopes that she and Kathryn would get along. We see Thomas’s window escape again, and Kathryn explains that she wanted to fix things with Landon on her own and not involve Thomas. Andy asks why Cameran went to the dinner party when she was avoiding them all season. She claims she wanted to let them prove that they could all get along. We see how well that worked.

We see the clip of Thomas insulting Cameran. She says she was “terrified,” since she’d never been spoken to that way. Grow up. Cameran says she lives her life by a certain standard and can probably work on her judgmental nature. They laugh about Craig not knowing what sanctimonious meant.

Moving on to Landon, who claims she was glad to hear Thomas stand up for Kathryn, who rolls her eyes. Landon says she never knew someone where the paternity had to be questioned, but apologizes. Not accepted. Kathryn says she feels that for once, Thomas was being honest. Thomas says his intentions were good. Shep says it takes two to tango, and you can’t be friends with someone who upsets one of a couple.

Andy brings up that it’s the second time Thomas went after Shep for being a momma’s boy. Shep says there’s a certain amount of nepotism that Thomas has benefited from too. Thomas says emotions are dangerous and feelings are to be felt, not acted upon. Shep applauds his epiphany. He says he didn’t live up to the Ravenel standard. Andy pries into Thomas and Kathryn’s business by asking if they spent the dinner party night together. Kathryn skirts the question, saying she just wanted Thomas to calm down. Thomas retracts everything he said and Cameran concurs that he called everyone afterward.

Cameran is called on the carpet about being on The Real World and hosting a Girls Gone Wild segment, the latter a surprise to all of us. She says she didn’t know what she was doing, but Shep thinks it’s awesome. Apparently, Landon was almost on The Hills and talks nonsense. Andy moves on to Kathryn’s dislike for Landon. She says the things Landon has said weigh heavy on someone who’s a mother. Cameran calls Kathryn “reactionary” and I wonder who uses that term in 2016.

Landon brings up Kathryn calling Thomas’s nanny out for domestic abuse and says that’s how he lost the campaign. Hahahahahahaha! Yeah. The fact that he went to prison for drug trafficking and didn’t exactly have a squeaky clean image had nothing to do with it. Andy brings up Landon and Thomas getting together, and how Thomas tried to appease Kathryn by keeping it from her. Kathryn says it hurt her feelings and she felt betrayed. They discuss Kathryn’s confrontation of Landon at the Founder’s Ball. Kathryn talks about how disrespectful Landon was and how she’s never accountable. Craig says there still isn’t a source for the animosity. Kathryn points to Landon and Thomas going out when she was pregnant. Landon claims that they never even held hands, but Kathryn says she knows better.

Andy asks Kathryn what she thinks happened. She says Landon initiated something and that Thomas told her that Landon wanted to make it look like they were together. Whitney claims Thomas told him he tried with Landon. We see the clips from Watch What Happens Live with Shep and Craig alluding to the fact it happened. Craig says he said he didn’t know because he didn’t know.

Andy brings up the end of the finale where Landon’s friend, Robyn, said that Landon and Thomas slept together. Cameran thinks Thomas can’t keep a secret, but Kathryn disagrees. Thomas claims any time he’s lied to Kathryn, he’s confessed, but Kathryn begs to differ. Andy asks if it even matters, and Kathryn says it doesn’t, but she wanted to know the truth. Landon says she never had sex with Thomas, but even if she had, he and Kathryn weren’t together at the time. Landon claims she never lies. Hello? Shep’s party?

Kathryn says she doesn’t trust any of them, except Craig and maybe Shep a little.

Andy says it’s been an eye-opening season and thanks everyone. Landon says she’s tired of defending herself. Cameran says she thinks they’ve had positive conversation and we see Kathryn and Whitney hugging it out during the break. Kathryn says they don’t need to hate each other and Whitney wants them to be friends for the kids’ sake. Shep is hoping to stay in Charleston and wants the best for the kids. Andy says Craig has changed a bit. Thomas says it’s important that he and Kathryn be good friends and allies for the kids.

Drinks are served. Shep gives a toast saying they understand each other in a way that no one else can and he loves everyone. They toast to Charleston.

The Haves and the Have Nots

DA Jennifer is pretty freaked about Wyatt’s death. She mentions the inheritance she let him have and says it was like putting drugs in his hand. Blake suggests she blame his parents or the drug dealer. He asks if she’s going to tell his parents and she says she can’t even look at them. Blake says he’ll do it.

Benny takes Hannah to Candace’s house. He tells her to calm down. Hannah is livid about Candace putting Quincy Jr. in foster care, even though it’s temporary. They argue and nosy neighbor tells Hannah she can call the police. Benny says, “Old lady, go to bed,” and makes me laugh. Hannah makes him apologize. Nosy alludes to Candace being a prostitute. She tells Benny if he doesn’t move his truck, she’ll call the police. Benny says he’ll move his damn truck when he wants to, but Hannah makes him apologize again and tells him to move the truck.

Nosy thanks Hannah and tells her not to go over to Candace’s. She says she saw a man go in and never come out, and there are visitors all day and all night. She also gives her two cents about the house design. Hannah tells her that Candace is her daughter. Nosy says she’s sorry and Hannah says she is too. Finally, we find out that Nosy’s name is Pearl. She tells Hannah about Quincy and how he came there and never came back out. She prattles on and says she has a picture of him from her camera, which she says she has trained on Candace’s house. She says she has a lot of policemen in her family. She asks if Hannah would like to see the picture and Hannah says yes. Pearl tells her not to show the guy she’s with and Hannah says that’s her son. Pearl runs inside like there’s a fire happening.

Hannah marches over to Benny. She tells him it’s late and they don’t know where Quincy Jr. is. She walks past him and knocks on Candace’s door. She confronts Candace about putting Quincy Jr. in foster care. Candace tells Benny to take Hannah home. Hannah asks if it’s because Quincy was there and tells Candace about Pearl having a picture of him. She asks if Candace is scared and tells Candace to let her or Benny take her son. Hannah asks a bunch of questions and Candace tells her that Quincy Jr. is with a preacher and his wife. She says he’ll only be there a short time. Hannah is concerned about Quincy coming back and begs Candace to let her have Quincy Jr. Candace tells them good-night and closes the door. Benny finally gets Hannah to leave while Pearl watches from the window.

Landon reads the article about Maggie to Jeffrey. Landon says he knows his mother must have lured Maggie there on purpose. Jeffrey starts to read it, but Landon takes his phone back. He says he doesn’t trust anyone and they’re all crazy. He says every one of them is always up to something and starts packing. He tells Jeffrey to get out.

Benny tells Hannah that Pearl is nuts. Hannah wonders how she would see Quincy go in , but not go out. Benny says maybe she just didn’t see him leave, but Hannah says she has cameras. She says someone like that has nothing better to do than sit around and watch everything. She wonders why Candace would even let Quincy in and then wonders why Benny isn’t upset. He says he knows Candace wouldn’t let Quincy in and tells Hannah to go to bed. She says it doesn’t make sense and asks why Benny keeps looking at his phone. He says he’s waiting for a text.

Hannah says David came to see her about Benny and asks if he’s still messing around with Veronica. He says no. She tells him he’s in the middle of fire if he still is. She says Veronica will use Benny up to get back at David. She thinks of how much alike Candace and Veronica are and then asks if Benny thinks Candace did something to Quincy. Benny says Pearl has Hannah talking crazy and she needs to let it go. Hannah says she hopes Candace is telling the truth that Quincy Jr. is safe because she lies when the truth will do.

Hannah wonders if Candace gave her son to Quincy. Benny says to give Candace some credit. He tells Hannah that Quincy Jr. is fine and to go to bed.

Benny texts Candace, telling her to be at his house in an hour. She calls him and he tells her about Pearl. Candace says she has to find out what Pearl knows and Benny tells her not to do anything stupid. He says Pearl could get them busted for real and they have to get the body out of there. She says they have to wait, at least until he stops smelling. Benny says he’ll look up how long it takes and Candace says she will – from Pearl’s house. He asks her what she’s going to do and she says what she knows how to do. He asks about Quincy Jr. and she tells him good-by. Benny thinks she must be lying about Quincy being with a preacher’s family.

David comes to Jim’s cell to apologize. Jim tells him that he didn’t call off the hit, but David says he knows he did. Jim admits it and David asks why. Jim says when he saw the look on David’s face and how he protects Veronica, he thought of Amanda. David tells him that Maggie is dead. He says apparently she interrupted a burglary – at least that’s what Veronica is telling the police. Jim tells him to sleep with his eyes open. David says he filed for divorce and Jim says all the more reason.

Jim asks if David loved Maggie and he says no. Jim asks if he slept with Maggie and David says he never cheated on his wife. Jim says David is a strong man, but he wishes David would find another way to vent his frustration. David apologizes again. They joke about the fight and Jim asks where it leaves them. David says, frenemies. David says he’ll work on getting Jim out. Jim asks him to hurry and says he owes him a serious ass kicking. They shake hands through the bars.

The phone rings at the Cryer house. Kathryn wakes up, but doesn’t want to answer.

Hannah’s phone rings. Katherine tells her she got “that phone call.” She says nobody calls this late and she didn’t answer it. She tells Hannah it’s ringing again and Hannah tells her to answer. Katherine says she can feel it. Hannah asks what the number is. Katherine gives her the number and Hannah says she’ll call her right back. Katherine lies in bed crying.

Hannah calls Blake. She asks why he was calling Katherine. Blake says it’s about her son. Hannah asks if he’s all right, but he says he needs to talk to Katherine. He asks who Hannah is and she says a friend. He repeats that he has to talk to Katherine personally and says someone is on the way to her house right now. Hannah says she’s already lost a child and have them wait until she gets there. She calls for Benny.

Without waiting for Benny, Hannah picks up his keys. Veronica is at the door. Hannah blows past her and drives away. Veronica asks Benny if he missed her. He says the reason he’s been calling her is that he needs to talk. She asks to talk inside. He says no and he wants her to talk to David. He says David is messing around with his business and he needs his money. He says David came looking for him, asking questions about the two of them, and he told David to talk to her. He tells Veronica to tell David there’s nothing going on.

Benny asks if she knew their picture was going to be in the paper and she says no. He says that’s a trick old chicks play, making their husbands jealous by screwing a young dude. She says if she was going to do that, she’d screw someone who could conjugate a verb or actually make some money. She says she used him for sex and it wasn’t even good. He tells her to get her old ass out of there and don’t come back. He says to tell David to stop messing with his phones or he’s coming after him. Veronica tells him to stay out of men’s games and basically that she was faking it with him. She says David is going to ruin him and to stay away from David because he’s dangerous.

Hannah gets to the Cryer house and thanks the detective for waiting. She calls Katherine and tells her to open the door. Katherine asks why she’s there and says she’s not opening the door. Hannah says Katherine asked her to be there and she is; now she has to open the door. Katherine just keeps saying no, but Hannah says she’s coming in with the extra key and Katherine has to come downstairs.

She opens the door and goes in with the detective. Hannah asks the detective how bad it is and he says, bad. He asks who Hannah is to Katherine and Hannah says she’s a friend, and that Katherine isn’t going to take this well.

Katherine comes down and says she doesn’t want the detective there. She says he was there when her daughter died and asks why he’s there. He says he’s sorry. She asks if her son is dead and he doesn’t say anything. She asks Hannah if her son is dead and the detective says he is. Katherine dissolves into screams and tears. Hannah runs to her and holds her. Tableau on the stairs.

Next time, the blood is scrubbed from Veronica’s walkway, Jim asks Hannah about the lawsuit, Katherine begs Hanna to do something that she says she can’t and Warlock continues to abuse Candace.

 

June 28, 2016 – GH, Below Deck Girls’ Retreat, Haves & Not So Much

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Kristina leaves a message for Parker while strolling through the park. Aaron comes up behind her and asks who Parker is.

Dante and Lulu toast to their new home. Dante adds, to a drama free closing. Good luck with that. Lulu says she has so many things to be thankful for, but misses Nicholas.

Some guy comes to the door of the shed. Jason says he’s looking for some people and maybe the guy can help.

Nicholas, who has chartered a plane, tells Ava that he’s had a couple of fortune reversals lately, one of which came from Hayden. Ava says she thought they weren’t getting along and he says it wasn’t exactly voluntary. He tells her he’s had a change of heart though, and he’s going to Greece without her.

Julian goes back and forth in his head about loving Alexis and killing her. She tells him she didn’t hear him come in and the bath is making her feel better. The doorbell rings. It’s Sonny. Alexis asks what Julian wanted and he says nothing really, and she goes to answer the door.

Alexis tells Sonny it’s not a good time. He wants to know why she’s still protecting Julian and she says he’s not helping. He says she’s not just hurting herself, she’s hurting Kristina. Julian comes downstairs and Sonny wants to know what he’s doing there. Um…it’s his house.

Ha-ha! Kristina and Aaron’s feet are so loud on the pathway, we can barely hear their conversation. Hello? Sound person? Kristina tells him about her mother. He says he’s not trying to be nosy, but from the tone of her voice, he was curious as to who Parker is. He said it sounded like she was leaving a message for a boyfriend. She says trust her, Parker isn’t a boyfriend.

Lulu asks Dante if he thinks Nicholas is still alive and he says no because he stinks as a cop. She says she’s been moving in that direction too, and once she and Laura accept it, they’ll have to consider living without Nicholas for the rest of their lives and she’s not ready for that.

Ava tells Nicholas that she was going to give the statue copy to a London dealer and if he couldn’t authenticate it, that would be his problem. Nicholas tells her again, she’s not coming with him, but she voices her concern about Hux following her.

Jason describes Ava and Nicholas to the guy, who says he hasn’t seen them. Jason thanks him, and starts to leave, but dude pulls out a gun and says Jason isn’t going anywhere.

Aaron says Kristina is obviously reaching out to someone she cares about. She tells him Parker is her ex, but technically, they never even started. She says they’re the definition of “it’s complicated.” Aaron is like okay, and Kristina is surprised he’s not bugging her for more information. He says his ex called him recently about an emergency, and during the conversation, he realized why he fell for her, but also why they broke up. Kristina thanks him for being cool about things. He says she has a friend in him and asks if she’d like a ride home.

Sonny asks what kind of husband would let his wife take a murder rap for him. He says he has to do what he can to protect his daughter and niece. Alexis tells them both to shut up and says their grandstanding and chest thumping isn’t what she needs. She says she wants Julian out and she’ll pack up his stuff. Sonny tells Julian he’s a psycho and Alexis is going to get to the point where she doesn’t want to save him anymore. Julian leaves.

Sonny asks Alexis what she’s thinking by being alone with Julian. Alexis says she was working him until Sonny blew it for her.

Nicholas asks what Ava’s long term plans are. He says Hux will track her down if she goes back home, but she says by the time she gets back to Port Charles, the real statue will be in the hands of a high-profile dealer and Hux won’t be able to do anything. She needs a place to lay low in the meantime.

Jason tells dude (who I wish had a name) that he doesn’t want any trouble. He assumes the guy works for Hux, who doesn’t want any witnesses to his kidnapping of Ava and Nicholas. Dude tells him right on the first try.

Sonny asks what he plan was and Alexis says she was recording him. She says Julian out-maneuvered her and her only way out was getting a confession. Sonny says the only way Julian knows he’ll be safe is killing her. Alexis says he’d never do that, because then he’d be the number one suspect. Sonny says again that Julian is only safe with her out of the way.

Julian sits at the bar downing shots. Lulu tells Dante she’ll have to call Lucky and tell him about Nicholas. She says living in denial is easier because with no body, there’s a chance. Hey, on this show, you can have a body and still have a chance.

Ava says if Nicholas wanted to, he could make up a plausible cover story and go back to Port Charles.

Jason distracts the gunman and then struggles with him. The gun goes off. How predictable was that?

Alexis says Julian is a monster. Sonny adds he’s a coward with no code. Alexis is like, oh, I guess a code makes you better mobster. Sonny says he might not be the best guy, but he doesn’t murder his friends and pin it on his wife. Alexis says they all live in glass houses and insists Julian isn’t going to kill her. She says she needs o find a way to clear her name and salvage some aspect of her life.

Aaron and Kristina flirt. Then they kiss. Kristina pulls away and Aaron asks if he did something wrong. She says she just wants to check on her mom. He asks if he can see her later and she tells him to text her and leaves.

Ava makes up a story for Nicholas about how he got picked up by a freighter and had memory problems when he came to. He says he already did once, and she says good, then he has a history. When he gets back he’ll be welcomed with open arms and he can say a *burglar pushed him out the window. Nicholas says if he goes back, he goes back to the reasons he left, and it’s better he remain dead.

*Ava actually used the word robber, but having been burgled, I know there’s a difference. A robber is someone who steals from a person; a burglar breaks into your house. In the made up story, Nicholas would have been surprised by a burglar. I know this is nit-picky, but I’ve been watching this for 50 years.

The gun is on the floor and Jason is still struggling with the guy. Jason gets the gun. And shoots.

Breaking news. Because nothing can ever wait until 4 o’clock. A whole 15 minutes from now. Explosions in Istanbul’s airport. Well, that’s not good, although I still think it could have waited. To ABC’s credit, we’re back quickly. They know how the fans can get.

Julian is still drinking when we get back. He thinks about how he almost killed Alexis. Sonny enters. Dante and Lulu tell him about the house and he acts surprised. I note that Sonny is aging really, really well and looks fit and tan. It pays to be in the coffee business. He calls Max, telling him Julian is where he said he would be, and to tell Diane thanks about Dante and Lulu’s house.

Sonny approaches Julian, who asks if Sonny is stalking him. He says obviously coming here was a mistake and Sonny says it’s not his first one.

Ava asks how long before they board. She’s all nervous, and Nicholas says it’s a private gate and Hux can’t follow them there. He says he hopes she understands he wants to keep things on the down low. They sort of flirt a little. Ava says she enjoys living off the grid with him because they have no history. She says with him, she’s a blank slate. I’m noting how much new Nicholas looks like Matthew Perry in the new Odd Couple. Which I highly recommend. I’m not much of a sitcom person, but it’s as funny as the old one. Maybe more so.

Okay, I guess Jason shot past the guy. He makes dude get on the floor, hands behind his back, and ties his hands together. He tells him to get up and I’m very impressed at how deft he is in doing it.

Dante asks Lulu if she wants him to call Lucky to come back to Port Charles. She says Lucky is a restless soul and spends most of his time in Africa helping refugees. She doesn’t think it’s a good idea to call him back, and that sometimes you have to accept what makes people happy. She says talking about Lucky makes her miss Nicholas more and that he saved her life once. Dante says without Nicholas, there would be no “us.” She says maybe they can name their next baby after him and Dante agrees. I’m almost sad, even though I know Nicholas is very much alive.

Jason tells dude to tell Hux that Ava and Nicholas are no longer his problem, and if he sees Hux around, he’s going to put a bullet in his head. Instead of being grateful Jason didn’t kill him, dude complains about being left with only his hands tied. Geez, count your blessings. Jason leaves with the gun.

Nicholas says Hux can’t search everywhere and she should book a flight to somewhere like Bali and leave him to clean up his own mess. She says she’s enjoyed traveling with Nicholas. He says he’s enjoyed her unexpected company and wouldn’t mind continuing on with her. The plane is ready. They both board.

Alexis tries asking Kristina about her life, but Kristina is too freaked, wondering why they didn’t arrest Julian. Alexis says they’ll find a way to prove he did it, but they have to stay calm in the meantime. She says it’s actually making her sick to her stomach and I have a flash of an idea that she’s pregnant.

What? Sonny read my mind. He asks Julian what man would let his pregnant wife stand trial. I guess she told him this off-screen? Or is he that good at picking up on it?

Tomorrow, Nathan almost sees Maxie’s wedding dress, Dillon doesn’t want to give up Kiki without a fight, Sonny tells Julian not to touch him, and Alexis admits she’s pregnant. I guess she is doomed to have mobsters’ children.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Danny tells Hannah she has an ugly personality and she responds like and adult, saying Danny is the one everybody hates. Bobby and Bryan insult Danny when he comes back to the table. Hannah talks to Julia and says Danny creates drama. She brings up that he took Ben’s side in an argument, like anyone cares. She says she’s going to go out of her way to annihilate him. Maybe these people shouldn’t drink. Ben tells Danny to cool it or he won’t be able to help in the galley anymore.

Julia and Jen decide to put a condom on an exceptionally long cucumber or zucchini or something. Bobby calls it Sex Ed 101, but I call it Boredom 101.

Hannah asks Ben to talk. She somehow connects Danny’s antics with Ben just wanting to be friends with her. She says apparently, they’re just work colleagues. Ben says successful work colleagues can be friends too. In his interview, Ben talks about them almost having a war over what to call a dish, so could you imagine a romance between them?

Captain Mark is annoyed that the crew’s mess is a mess. Ha-ha! Hannah calls Bobby into her cabin and asks him to help her change. I guess because she’s drunk. She starts making out with him, saying in her interview that she’d been hesitant with Bobby, not knowing where she stood with Ben. She asks what happened after she left the dinner, which is not much, and tells Bobby that she’s going to make Danny’s life a living hell. She asks if Bobby wants to help. Sigh.

Bryan tells Danny to make a list of what he thinks is required for his job – according to Bryan. He actually does pretty well and Bryan says there’s no excuse for breaking those rules now. Double sigh.

Bobby tells Julia about Hannah’s mission. She says Danny does bring a lot of drama.

Hannah goes to the wheelhouse and tells the captain about Danny taking photos of the guests and showing them to other guests. As far as I know, he only showed one guy the Tilted Kilt girls. Hannah says it’s getting to be too much and she’s just giving Captain Mark a heads up. The captain says he’s never had anyone so ethically professionally challenged as Danny. I think this is what you get for hiring someone that young and inexperienced. Don’t they go to a class and get an employee handbook or something? Do they just hire these people off the street?

Captain Mark calls Danny in and talks to him about the pictures. The captain says it’s hard to discipline a new crew member when they didn’t know what they were doing is wrong. Like any good teacher captain, Captain Mark says he’s going to keep Danny’s phone while guests are on the boat.

The next charter is all women for a girls’ retreat. The primary, Linda, is the CEO of a wealth building system using luxury brands, which sounds like an MLM to me. Ben is glad to hear they want dinner on the beach so he can get out of the hot, sweaty galley.

Bryan asks Julia about cleaning up the crew mess. He gets bossy and she asks if he’s drunk. He gives the women orders and doesn’t want to help. Julia asks if he’s just going to stand there and watch, and he gets annoyed. Hannah says he’s being rude and he says he’s just doing his job. Hannah suggests either he walk away or they do. He leaves and Hannah tells Julia they should take five minutes to re-group. Bryan boomerangs back, following them to the galley. Hannah tells him he’s being aggressive and to knock it off.

Julia says she doesn’t want to be cleaning when she’s supposed to be doing the crew’s laundry. I’m assuming everyone contributed to this untidiness, why aren’t they all helping to clean up? In his interview, Bryan says he’s not sorry for being a dick. Really. He said that. Hannah thinks he should stay away from alcohol. I concur. The girls are having a snack in the crew mess and Hannah expresses her annoyance with Bryan.

Bryan asks to talk to Danny who is deathly ill. I don’t think Bryan believes it though. Ben thinks Hannah put voodoo on Danny. The crew gets ready for the charter. Hannah calls for a jeweler to bring a collection to the yacht for the guests to peruse.

Bryan tells the captain about Danny, who says he doesn’t want him infecting the rest of the crew. Bryan apologizes to Julia without apologizing. She says when he drinks, he gets aggressive and you should never stand over a woman the way he did. She says she doesn’t want to be confronted like that again. In her interview, she says even her parents never did that to her, and Bryan would get more out of the crew if he had more compassion. I see why everyone likes Tiffany – she stays very far away and out of the drama.

The guests arrive and the boat leaves port. A ferry is coming in and they have to hurry. Bryan doesn’t think Jen knows how to do as much as she says she does. Maybe it’s him.

The guests have Margaritas on deck. One of them says she’s never had a tequila hangover. God bless her. Years ago, I had one so bad, I never drank it again. The crew packs everything for the beach day. Bryan wants to talk to Jen, but she’s wrangling one of the jet skis that escaped. He says there’s a disconnect between Jen and her brain. Maybe, but Bryan has a disconnect between himself and humanity. In her interview, Jen says she’s seen good in Bryan, but thinks the job has gone to his head and he’s sexist.

The guests jet ski around. The crew packs up the picnic, but it’s noticed that the marshmallows aren’t exactly the right ones to make the requested s’mores. I agree, since they’re weird shapes and colors. Who bought those? The crew sets everything up on shore.

Ben makes a fabulous meal and the guests are impressed. I’m not sure what he’s doing with those s’mores though. The marshmallows are a total mess. Bobby says they’re like strawberry Peeps. Doesn’t matter. Either they still taste good enough or the ladies are drunk enough not to care. Everyone is happy.

Captain Mark checks on Danny. At last check, his temperature was 101. The captain says he’ll try to find something for him. He’s concerned the entire crew might get wiped out if it’s contagious.

The guests come back and go straight to bed. Hannah thinks she’s died and gone to heaven, the guests are so undemanding. Bobby tries to get advice from Jen about Julia. In her interview, Jen says he’s not Julia’s type even if she was single.

The Captain tells Ben that Danny’s temperature is now 103.2. He gives Danny something similar to liquid Tylenol and is trying to get the fever down. In his interview, Ben says this is nothing to fool around with. In her interview, detestable Hannah says karma’s a bitch.

Hannah and Bobby are having a thing. She says he’s nice about ten times in her interview. Danny’s temperature is 102.9 the next morning. Not much improvement. Bryan wants Jen to practice her knots. Even though there are several ways to do them, he wants it done his way. Bobby tells Julia about whatever is going on between him and Hannah. Like she cares. In her interview, she wonders if he’s trying to make her jealous or being one of those friends you can tell anything to.

The guests are loving everything and the crew is loving the guests. Tiffany thinks Bryan is being ridiculous with Jen about the knots.

Next temperature check is 102.7. Ben tells Danny to hang in there. He tells the captain that Danny’s temperature is still way high. He asks the captain what he wants to do. In his interview, the captain says it’s not like they’re on land and they can just drive somewhere. Ben puts on the air conditioning for Danny. Crap, his temperature is back to 103.2 again.

A few of the guests do the jet ski thing again. The captain confers with some of the other crew members and says they have to get Danny off the boat.

Next time, the guests are a group of hard partiers who want to party so hard they need a vacation from the vacation, Julia gets miffed at Ben and more knot instruction by Bryan.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Long story short, Jeffrey seduces Justin.

David continues to beat the snot out of Jim. The guard finally pulls him off. David tells the guard that Jim put a hit out on his wife. The guard says his wife is here. She’s in the interrogation room being questioned. David finds out it was Maggie who was killed – at Veronica’s house. That’s right, David, put two and two together.

I have some chocolate babka during the commercial break and laugh about that Seinfeld episode all over again.

Jeffrey has Justin handcuffed to the bed and puts his clothes back on. Justin tells Jeffrey to give him the key and says he’s not gay. Jeffrey asks him why he’s angry. He says Justin is the type who gets angry at the other guy for what he did, and he was like that once. Jeffrey puts the key out of Justin’s reach and says he has to go, but Justin will figure it out. He says he just doesn’t trust him. He says Justin is way to angry and he’ll take it out on him because he enjoyed it. He says when Justin can calm down and come out of the closet, and he’s ready to help him take down Veronica, call him. He tells Justin good luck and leaves.

David says he needs to talk to his wife. The guard says it will be just a little while. Veronica asks if she’s a suspect and looks appropriately shaken up. She says Maggie was her friend. I don’t know who is doing the interrogating, but Veronica tells her about the guy she thought she saw in the neighbor’s backyard and how Maggie pulled up and she told her to go inside.

Oscar calls David. He says Jim called off the hit. David tells him Maggie got killed. Oscar says Jim wouldn’t be so sloppy, hiring some guy from the hood, and Jim definitely called it off. Oscar says look at the bright side, his wife is still alive. David is like, yeah, right, the bright side.

Veronica asks how she could have known anyone was in the house and starts to cry over Maggie being her friend. The guard comes in and says something to the interrogator. She tells Veronica that David is there. David walks in and Veronica throws her arms around him, sobbing. She asks him to take her home. He asks the interrogator to schedule another time and she says they’ll call. Veronica acts all stressed out and runs out the door.

Benny gets back from visiting Candace. Hannah asks what she said. He says nothing. He might as well just tell her. He admits Candace won’t let either one of them take Quincy Jr. Hannah goes on about all of Quincy Jr.’s needs and wants to call Candace about giving him his morning medicine. Benny says he’ll call. Hannah asks him if Quincy Jr. was even there and Benny says no.

Hannah asks where he is and Benny says he doesn’t know. Hannah picks up the phone and calls Aliyah. She asks where her grandson is. Aliyah says she can’t discuss it and Hannah has to talk to her daughter. Hannah says Quincy Jr. isn’t with Candace and she’ll call the police. Aliyah keeps repeating she can’t say anything, but then does. She says Quincy Jr. was put in temporary foster care by Candace. Hannah asks where and Aliyah says she can’t tell her that and keeps saying she’s sorry. She finally says good-by.

Hannah tells Benny that Quincy Jr. is in foster care. She wants to go to Candace right now. Benny tells her she’s going to have a heart attack. Hannah says she doesn’t care, as long as she’s whoopin’ Candace’s ass when she goes, she’ll die happy. Benny keeps telling her to calm down, but Hannah can’t believe Candace would put Quincy Jr. in foster care because she hates Hannah so much. She cries out to God for help. I love Hannah’s heart, but man! she can be dramatic.

Jeffrey sees Landon at the hotel bar. He asks if Jeffrey has seen Candace. Landon is obviously looking around for someone, but he tells Jeffrey nothing is going on. He asks what Jeffrey is doing there and Jeffrey says he has a room there. Landon says he thought Jeffrey knew Candace and Jeffrey says she’s trouble. Landon says thanks for telling him now, and tells him about how Oscar swindled Candace and she threatened Landon’s life.

Jeffrey asks Landon if his father and Maggie are having an affair and Landon tells him yes. Jeffrey says good, because Maggie makes his father happy. Landon asks him for a tryst and Jeffrey tells him that he’s drunk and he’s had better. Landon says he can be better and Jeffrey says not as good as him, looking at Justin, who’s obviously freed himself and gotten dressed. Jeffrey pretends not to know Justin. Landon is about to leave, when he looks at his phone.

It’s the news about Maggie getting shot and killed. He gives Jeffrey the phone and asks if he’s reading it right. Jeffrey confirms the news. Landon is incredulous and says there’s no way. He runs out and Jeffrey goes after him.

The hotel manager complains about kids giving their hotel a bad name, while Wyatt lies there dead. The security guy says people are calling it the Dude Die Inn. The guy Jennifer sent to look for Wyatt calls her and tells her to get to the hotel now.

Meanwhile, at the Cryer mansion, Katherine wanders around like a zombie. Wait until she finds out Wyatt is dead. She goes to Wyatt’s room, and then meanders to their daughter’s (Amanda?) room and makes a phone call. Hannah’s phone rings. She ignores the call. Katherine calls again and Hannah picks up.

Katherine asks how Hannah is and where she is. Hannah says fine and she has a place. Katherine tells Hannah she’s sorry and tells her she should have given her the money. She says she was blindsided by Hannah leaving and never considered that she didn’t have anywhere to go. Hannah says she’s fine. Katherine says she can bring her the money and tells her she has a rental place Hannah can stay at. Hannah insists she’s fine. Katherine says she needs Hannah’s help.

Hannah says Katherine’s motives are always suspect. Katherine says she doesn’t have the strength for this, and Hannah says what makes her think she does? Katherine says she can’t lose her only child and asks Hannah to pray for her and her son. She says she’s made her bed and she should lie in it, but her children shouldn’t suffer. She talks about how well Benny turned out and Hannah says she still has Candace who makes up for it. Katherine says at least she got one right. She says she has no idea where Wyatt is and Hannah says all she can do is wait. Katherine says she’s afraid. She’s scared that every time the phone rings, it’s going to be bad news and Hannah says she knows the feeling.

Katherine asks if she gets the call, will Hannah be there? Hannah says who’ll be there for her, and Katherine says she will. Katherine says she has no one else and Hannah says she doesn’t think she’ll get that call, but she’ll be there. She adds until that time, they have nothing to say to each other. Katherine says she understands and she’s sorry. They say good-by. Great scene.

I get up as soon as the commercials start and fork some KFC whole kernel corn in front of the refrigerator and it’s the shortest commercial break ever. By the time I get one forkful to my mouth, it’s over.

Veronica tells David his plan didn’t work and accuses him of ordering the hit. David says Jim set it up and he’d been trying to protect her by keeping her in jail. She says even if it was true about Jim, he must have wanted it to happen. David turns the tables, accusing Veronica of setting Maggie up. He says Jim wouldn’t have been so stupid to hire an amateur. He gets aggressive with Veronica and she tells him to look in the rear view mirror; security is following them. He tells her that her wish is in the glove box. Divorce papers. She tears them up. She says if she finds out he’s gone behind her back, or she’s outed in any way, she’ll make his life a living hell. He says hell is better than what he’s going through now.

David tells Veronica to get out of the car. She refuses. He says he’ll drag her ass out. She says there’s the husband she wants and she’d be glad to see it. He gets out and comes around to her side. She says he didn’t act like that when Maggie was alive and she needed him. She gets in the security car as David drives away.

Jennifer shows up at Wyatt’s hotel room. Her guy confirms that Wyatt is dead.

Next time, Candace’s nosy neighbor tells Hannah to stay away from Candace, Landon doesn’t trust Jeffrey, David apologizes to Jim, and Katherine finds out about Wyatt.

June 21, 2016 – GH, Danny Does the Mediterranean & the Haves & Nots Return

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

I want my old Nicholas back. I read he’s temporarily being replaced because of contract negotiations. (He also got his first Daytime Emmy this year.) Give him what he wants.

Ava bangs on the door and hollers. Nicholas reminds her that they’re captives. He says he comes from a long line of kidnappers and she’s going about getting out in the wrong way. He suggests they see what Hux wants. Right now, what he wants is to give them a snack.

Kiki can’t stop sneezing. Dillon is picking her up for their date and he tells her she looks amazing. She starts coughing and he asks if she’s okay. She says she’s fine, but when he asks if she has a cold, she says the worst in history.

Epiphany is cursing out the computer and I relate. She tells Carly about what happened with Finn. Epiphany says the mess is trickling down to the rest of them.

Hayden has the notebook that she got out of Finn’s locker. She asks what’s wrong with him anyway and he says he’s dying. He tells her that when he was traveling, he contracted a rare disease that there’s no cure for, but he found a way to keep it stable. The treatment is becoming less effective though. She asks if he’s under a doctor’s care, but he says no doctor can help him. He asks if she wants to play backgammon.

Julian wants to see Alexis and just barges into the interrogation room. Sonny hopes against hope that Julian rises to the occasion and plays hero for her, but he’s not optimistic. He gets a call from Morgan who asks him to come to the clinic.

Alexis says Julian must want to know what she’s said, but she’s not saying anything until her attorney gets there. She accuses him of setting her up.

Nicholas tells Hux he appreciates the food, but wishes he’d conclude his business with Ava so they can go. He wants to know why they’re being held captive. Hux says if Ava thinks about it, she’ll figure it out. He tells them to eat, drink and think. Ava wonders where the ruthless guy Nicholas has become went to. She says his manners aren’t going to get them anywhere. Nicholas asks what she has that Hux wants.

Julian is shocked that Alexis thinks he set her up. He tells her he loves her and everything he’s done, he’s done to protect them and their family. Yeah, yeah, we’ve heard that before. Jordan and Anna watch from the window. Anna wonders who’s going to sell out who first.

Morgan tells Sonny the doctors want to release him, but he doesn’t feel ready and thinks Sonny is the only person who would understand. Sonny says Morgan can’t be objective about his condition, but if the doctors think it’s time for him to leave. then it’s time. Morgan says athe clinic, everyone tells him what to do, but wonders what he’ll do outside. Sonny says he’ll figure out his way, but if he has any trouble, he has his family to depend on. He tells Morgan he has to be positive and how proud he is of him. He says Morgan has been through a lot and has come out stronger. Morgan says he doesn’t want to let Sonny down. Sonny says he will, and Sonny will let him down too, but then they’ll pick each other up and make it right. They exchange I love yous.

Ava says she has no idea what Hux wants. Nicholas says ever since he staged his accident, he had no problem being undiscovered, but then he sat next to Ava. He wonders if she’s in on something with Hux.

Jordan asks Anna if there’s a chance that Julian will confess to save Alexis. Anna says no way, but at least Alexis will get a clue. Alexis tells Julian they have the weapon. She tells him it was genius to take something that could be traced back to her. He says he cleaned it and she tells him he missed a spot. Actually, she says it like, “Ya missed a spot,” as though he’d been cleaning windows. Ha-ha!

Ava tells Nicholas it’s an interesting, but flawed, theory. She says before they met on the plane, they’d never exchanged more than pleasantries, and how could she track him down on a commercial airline? She adds it would also be to shake him down for something he doesn’t have, since he’s broke. Hux returns. She says she doesn’t know what he wants and he says what he wants is otherworldly and divine.

Hayden asks if the disease is like cancer and if it’s contagious. He says no and no, she’s safe. He says no one knows about this except him and Roxie, and now Hayden.

Sonny asks Michael and Carly to meet him at the clinic. He brings in Morgan who tells them he’s coming home. Morgan says he was released in the morning, but he was hesitant and wanted to talk to Sonny first. Carly says she’s proud of him and he says he couldn’t have done it without his family. I will say, if I was going to be in a Port Charles family, this would be a good one, although I’d probably choose the Quartermaines, keeping to myself a lot and only joining them for dinner on holidays.

Alexis says the dagger has her prints and Carrrlos’s blood on it, and she’s screwed. Julian insists he didn’t set her up. She says there’s only one way she’s not going to prison. If he confesses.

Kiki says she didn’t want to cancel the date, but all of a sudden, her cold got worse, although she managed to get ready without collapsing. Dillon says she could have just called him, but she says she didn’t want him to think she was brushing him off. She says he’s been an awesome friend and she didn’t want to blow it. He tells her no chance of that and they kiss.

Now Elizabeth is having problems with the computer. When she’d caught Hayden getting Finn’s journal in the locker room, Hayden had said she had an appointment there. Elizabeth is checking to see if she really had one, but that’s a no.

Hayden tells Finn the hospital is railroading him for no good reason. She asks him if he could die if he doesn’t discover a cure. He says he likes his life and he hopes not. She asks to help him.

Nicholas tells Hux to stop the games. Hux asks what’s in Ava’s case and tells her he wants the “Weeping Nyad,” (not sure if I got that right) some figurine that had been stolen from his estate a long time ago. He tells her to give the case to him and she says no.

Julian tells Alexis he can’t do that. She says he told her he loves her and wants to protect her family, but she’s not surprised. He says he doesn’t have to confess and she doesn’t have to go to prison; there’s another way. He says she can be acquitted.

Ava argues with Hux, who slices Nicholas with a rapier he just happens to have handy. Ava gives him the case. Nicholas asks why he didn’t just take it and Hux says stealing is wrong and he wanted her to give it to him willingly, even though that’s not exactly what happened. He leaves with the case. Nicholas asks Ava what the blip a weeping nyad is. Hux comes back and tells Ava they have a serious problem.

Elizabeth tells Epiphany about catching Hayden in the locker room. Epiphany asks why Hayden would be in there. Elizabeth says she has no clue, but she’s going home since it’s been a long day. Epiphany gives her some crickets to drop off to Finn at the MetroCourt.

Hayden wants to help Finn, but he says no. They play backgammon. Hayden says respecting boundaries isn’t her strong suit, but she’ll try to mind her own business. He asks her to keep what she knows to herself. He says he wants to help people with the time he has left. She brings up his wife and asks if she had the same illness.

Morgan tells everyone how grateful he is and hands out a bunch of compliments. Morgan says he has something to do before he leaves.

Dillon and Kiki make out like bandits.

Alexis is astounded that Julian wants her to stand trial. He says he doesn’t want that, but if she pleads not guilty, they still have a chance. She says a chance at what and tells him their marriage is over. Jordan comes in and says time’s up.

Hayden agrees to keep everything to herself. She says Finn should appreciate her uncharacteristic caring about someone else. She says he does have to eat something though and he asks her to go get sandwiches from a vegetarian place. He asks why she’s not judging him on his vegetarianism and she tells him his secret is safe.

Hux tells Ava that it’s a reproduction. He throws it on the ground, smashing it, and asks where the real one is. She says if he wants it, he’ll have to glue it together. He tells her that if she doesn’t come up with the real one, she’ll never get out of the room alive.

Dillon calls in a prescription for Kiki. He leaves and Morgan knocks at the door. Wouldn’t they have passed each other?

Carly can’t believe Julian did nothing to help Alexis. Sonny says he’s the same coward he’s always been. He wants to tell Kristina about it before she hears from someone else.

Jordan tells Julian he’s done and get out. Anna comes in to see Alexis. She says she’s there to protect Alexis and knows she didn’t kill Carrrlos. She says if Alexis will help her convict who did, she won’t stand trial.

Tomorrow, Ava tells Hux she’s not lying, Nicholas tells Hux that Ava is lying, and Morgan has a confession to make.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Danny and Bobby are partying with the guests on the beach. Jerry, the primary, tells them he’ll give a hundred dollars to whoever can kiss the girl dancing on the bar first. Bobby approaches her about it and she says, sorry, but no. He tells Danny she doesn’t speak English well. Danny gets up on the bar and dances with her. She gives him a kiss on the cheek and Danny wins. Jerry calls Danny “ninja,” and Bobby “grasshopper.” Obviously, this is not going over well with Bobby.

Hannah is still dealing with her migraine. Julia tells her about the awkwardness with Bobby and how he doesn’t want to talk to her after she brushed him off. Bryan complains about Jen having no motivation. Hannah radios Danny, but he’s too busy having fun to notice. Or maybe he’s just ignoring her.

Danny chats up the girls for the guests and invites them to the yacht. He says he’s like the genie from Aladdin. I didn’t know he was gay. Ha-ha! Bobby can’t believe the luck Danny is having. Danny radios Hannah, telling her the guests want dinner at seven and they’ll be bringing another eight people. Ben isn’t sure what the blip he’s going to do.

The guests praise Danny for his party-worthiness. Ben makes a bunch of meat, cheese and fruit plates to appease the guests’ appetites until dinner. Hannah says it’s not unusual for charter guests to invite people on, but she’s a big fan of manners. Really? I wouldn’t have guessed that. Bryan complains about Danny again, but aren’t they supposed to do everything to make the guests happy?

Everyone gets back to the boat. Ben says you can only laugh and Hannah adds anything else will send them to prison. Danny tells the guests he has to get back to work. He offers to help the stews if need be. Tiffany says he talks a good game, but they never actually see him helping. He apologizes to Ben and says he’ll do whatever he can to help things run smoothly.

For the first time, I actually feel sorry for Hannah. This is a loud group and not a group to be around if you have any kind of headache, much less a migraine. Dinner is served. One of the guests asks why the boat is rocking so much when they’re not going anywhere. Um…because it’s on water and the water is moving, genius. Jerry makes fun of Bobby and offers Danny a job. Julia says Danny isn’t a yachty, he’s a salesman.

Bobby complains to the others about Danny. I wonder if he’s going to be complaining if the tip is bigger. Bryan says it’s not Danny’s role to create experiences for the guests; they’re supposed to do that for themselves. This is confusing, as since this show began it’s been impressed upon us that the crew is to do whatever the guests want to ensure they have a good time.

As usual, I go out of my mind over the food. Jerry tells everyone that after dinner, it’s hot tub time. Captain Mark isn’t thrilled about having to get the extra people back to shore, but he’s not as annoyed about Danny as Bryan would like.

Danny helps out in the galley, which bothers Hannah. The guests compliment the chef. Since Jerry has told Danny he looks like the Karate Kid, Danny breaks out his bandanna for them. The extra guests get ready to leave, although they’ve been mentally ready to leave for a while. Jerry gives the girls his number and says they’ll meet in Athens. Like they’re ever going to call.

Hannah goes over things with Ben, acting like its his fault there were extra guests. She tells him that having Danny in the galley is frustrating for her. She says she’s trying to work with it, since he’s helping Ben and Ben basically says too bad. He’s the chef and if he wants Danny’s help, that’s what he’s getting.

Hannah says when Ben pisses her off, she does something with Bobby to send a dagger his way. I highly doubt Ben cares. He’s just not that into her. The guests are up early, but no one woke Ben early, which he’s not happy about. He still makes a fabulous breakfast. Adding Ben cooking for me to my bucket list.

Danny says the guests are calling him the charter king, and Bryan reminds him that it’s the guests who are king. He says he’s already told them that it’s all about them. The guests do some jet skiing. Danny tells them they’re his favorite charter. I’ll bet he says that to all the charters.

The weather is getting iffy. Captain Mark tells Bryan that docking is going to be tough. Bryan gives the deckhands instructions. The guests have lunch inside. Jen has too much slack in her line and is having trouble. Everyone else has to compensate, but the docking happens without incident.

Jerry tells Danny to just say the word and he has a job. In his interview, Bryan says Jen has a false sense of entitlement and that she doesn’t work as well as she claims. Danny gives the guests pictures off of his phone and Bryan is miffed about this.

Tip time! I mean, it’s time to say good-by to the guests. Jerry gives Captain Mark the envelope, but he also has an “MVP” tip for Danny. Oh man, the rest of them must be boiling. In his interview, Bryan says he can’t wait to start the process of the deflation of Danny’s head. Per the “one for all” policy, he has to split it with the rest of them. In Danny’s interview, he says that even this doesn’t make them happy. I’m not crazy about Danny, and I think he was all kinds of wrong on the charter with the Tilted Kilt girls, but I’m with him here. I think he’s being unnecessarily picked on.

Captain Mark says it was a weird one because of the drunkiness and extra guests. He tells them Danny’s 500 EURO tip has been rolled into the community tip. Oddly enough, the tip is lower than usual and even the extra from Danny doesn’t make up for it. $16,000 USD, whereas it’s usually around $20,000. I was expecting more too.

Bryan tells Danny that he shouldn’t have been the focus of the guests’ good time. Danny says that wasn’t the goal, but he can’t help how people react to him. Bryan says he understands the confusion, but it isn’t the standard that they operate at.

Hannah complains that Ben hasn’t tried anything with her, even when they’re drunk. Julia says Bobby would be hot if he’d just shut his mouth. In her interview, she hopes Hannah and Bobby get together so he’ll stop bothering her.

It’s the crew’s night off and they go to dinner on shore. In his interview, Ben says he sees an attraction between Hannah and Bobby, but not much going on upstairs. Bryan brings up the small tip. Hannah gets antagonistic with Ben. She asks him if they’re friends or just colleagues. Danny tells Jen he hates how fake everyone is. In her interview, Hannah says she doesn’t want drama, but she’s annoyed with Ben. So in that case, drama is okay. Ben tells Hannah he didn’t like her throwing him under the bus, and she brings up Ben going to the captain about her. He says that was his generous side and she tells him f-u. With all their faults, and the revolving door of crazy and/or temporary workers, the original Below Deck crew was much more laid back. And I never thought I’d use that term in regard to them.

Ben says he didn’t want to be the target if there was a bad tip, and the next time Hannah screws up, she needs to work with him.Danny tells Hannah that she has an ugly personality and that she needs to stop being angry all the time. He starts to leave and she blocks him. She tells him he’s the one everyone hates. Julia asks where all that came from and Ben says from the sea, darling. Ha-ha! Hannah tells the camera people to get the cameras off of her.

Next time, Hannah and Bobby get busy, it’s a girls’ retreat charter, and Hannah complains to the captain about Danny. He’s going to be fired yet. At least he has a job with Jerry.

Note: I’m watching the later airing of the next show and Watch What Happens Live in between. Andy Cohen is being the biggest yenta I’ve ever seen, trying to hook Hannah and Bobby up for life.

The Haves and the Have Nots

The gunman waiting in Veronica’s house shoots Maggie a bunch of times. Veronica pretends to be shocked and ducks behind a car. This gunman is a supreme amateur because he walks right out the front door and is killed by the officer who’d been talking to Veronica. I mean, he didn’t even check to see who was out there and walked out in his ski mask, dressed in black and holding the gun. I guess going out the back door or at least not looking like a criminal didn’t occur to him.

Jeffrey and Candace ponder the blood still left on the floor. Candace asks Jeffrey if he told anyone about Quincy. Jeffrey blames Candace for everything and says he can’t take this. Candace says they have to find out how Veronica knows about Qunicy’s murder. He asks if she told her brother and tells her that Benny and Veronica have been sleeping together. Candace doesn’t want to believe it. She says she never told Benny anything and it’s disgusting to think Benny is sleeping with Jeffrey’s mother. Jeffrey says as soon as he gets his phone, he’ll prove it. Candace says he’d better find out how Veronica discovered what they did. He says he’s not going back there and Candace says fine, they’ll both go to jail then.

Candace repeats that Jeffrey needs to find out what Veronica knows and how she knows it. Jeffrey says he can’t go back and then realizes Veronica tracked him from his car keys. He says she controls everything and he has to get the keys. Candace says she’s not taking the chance of digging the keys up, since they’re buried with Quincy. She tells him to do it himself. He says Veronica was the best at whatever she did and she can put things together. He says nothing is a coincidence for her and she’s relentless. He wishes he could be as wicked, conniving and cunning as both Veronica and Candace, and then he wouldn’t be in the position he’s in.

Jeffrey is shouting by now and Candace tells him that’s enough. She asks what he thinks Veronica is going to do. He says anything she wants and that she hates him. Candace says Veronica hates her too, but Jeffrey says not as much as she hates him. Candace hugs him and tells him it’s okay. He says the only way to stop Veronica is to “do her” before she “does him.”

Wyatt has no pulse. The hotel manager complains that junkies give his hotel a bad name.

Lloyd calls Candace, telling her they’re approving her loan and they can get it to her in two days. He says he’ll call tomorrow with the details. Candace calls Warlock. He doesn’t want to talk on the phone and tells her to meet him. Lloyd tells Jim that it’s done. Jim tells him to take everything Candace owns in fourteen days. Jim goes back to his cell. And I don’t mean his phone.

Benny sees Hannah at the bus stop. He tells her she missed the last bus and she shouldn’t be too proud for him to give her a ride. She tells him that Candace hit her. He says she hit Candace first and they’re both wrong. After getting his mother’s disapproval, he amends it to Candace shouldn’t have hit her. He says he didn’t know where Candace had gotten the money and thinks he should still sue the Cryers. Hannah says she taught him that fair is fair and he’s already gotten plenty. She says Candace would rather steal than earn anything.

He asks why she cares. She says he’s been given a second chance at life and greed can only lead to his destruction. She explains why she never went to the police about Wyatt and that she had to be sure. She says she watched the Cryers’ lives fall apart and doesn’t want him to be a part of it. She tells him to earn his own money, to take what he’s already been given and move on. He says okay, he won’t sue, on the condition that she moves in with him.

Hannah says no. She still doesn’t like how Candace got the money. He says either he sues and wins and buys her a house or he doesn’t and she moves in. She says she has to go to Candace and ask for Quincy Jr. one more time. Benny thinks that’s a bad idea and she says then he should ask. He says he’ll bring her back to his house and go ask.

The ambulance is really slow in this town. David drives up to Veronica’s house and thinks something happened to her. He drives off, presumably to kill Jim.

Mitch is making out with a girl in the back of a truck at Benny’s tow yard. She wonders why, since he owns it, it has Benny’s name on it. They’re about to get busy when Warlock and Candace drive up. They duck down.

Candace tells War she’ll have his money in two days. He says she told him she had it and he got out of bed for nothing. He says he held a federal judge in his basement for days for her, and she owes it to him to be honest. He says she’s his girl and how dare she treat him like this? He tells her she’s lost all her dignity. She tells him about the loan and says she’s trying to redeem herself. He asks why she’s doing this to him. He says he doesn’t want to hurt Benny. He says Benny is his boy, but so was his pops and she knows what War did to him when his pops crossed him. He tells her she has two days.

War criticizes how she’s dressed, saying she dressed sexy to change his mind. She says she didn’t have time to change and knows better than to lie to him. He assaults her against the fence. Mitch sees what’s going on from the truck.

Jeffrey is hanging out at a bar when one of a group of ladies asks him to join them. He says he’s not interested. She’s obviously drunk and tells him he doesn’t have to be rude, throwing a drink at him. He gets in a bit of an argument with the group. The bartender calls one of them “judge” and it turns out to be the judge trying the Harrington case. Creepy cop Justin comes in and she tells him to apologize to Jeffrey because she’s not allowed to talk to him.

Justin sits down and asks what Jeffrey is doing there. Jeffrey tells him to be in whatever room number he’s in, in fifteen minutes. Justin acts ignorant and Jeffrey tells him don’t be late.

Benny goes to Candace’s place. She’s just pulling up and asks if Mitch called him. He says no, and he needs to talk to her. She says she needs to talk to him too, and they go inside. He says he’s sick of her lying and asks her where she got the money from. She tells him from Jim Cryer. Benny asks if she’s blackmailing him and she says Jim gave it to her. He asks why Jim would do that. She leads him into the bathroom, opens a hidden safe and hands him a folder.

Benny asks if she’s blackmailing him with the pictures and she says she’s just fulfilling his fantasy. He says so she’s a prostitute, but Candace says she’s Jim’s woman. Benny says Jim is married and Candace says she just provides a fantasy. Benny asks why she has the pictures and Candace says Jim is into videos too.

Benny tells her he’s not suing them. She asks if it’s because of their mother and he says it’s because of him, and they need to discuss Quincy Jr. She says he’s fine and Benny asks if Hannah can take him. Candace says no, and Benny asks if he can take him. Candace says that’s the same thing and she doesn’t want Hannah to do to Quincy Jr. what she did to them. She says if that’s why he came here, he can leave.

Candace brings up Veronica and says she’s heard some disgusting things about the two of them. Benny says he doesn’t want to talk about that. Candace asks what is he thinking and Benny suddenly wants to leave. She tells him good-by, “Mr. Harrington.”

There’s a knock at Jeffrey’s hotel door. It’s Justin, who asks why Jeffrey is talking to his wife and says Jeffrey set it up. Jeffrey says he didn’t know that was his wife and tells him he should really see someone. Jeffrey says he seems to like restrictions put on him and maybe that’s why he married a judge. Jeffrey says Justin is obviously intrigued by him. He tells Justin to relax and have a drink. He asks what happened to the arrogant cop who got aroused by touching him.

Justin starts to leave and Jeffrey says his wife is pretty. Justin turns back and asks if Jeffrey wants to disappear. Jeffrey says he just wants to talk and drink, and he’s not interested in Justin’s wife. He thinks Justin is a creep who hides behind a badge and wears cheap cologne and he had no idea that this was going to happen, yet here they are.

Justin asks why he’s there and Jeffrey says first have a drink and maybe they can help each other out. Justin asks how.

David requests to see Jim. He asks the guard to turn his back and not let anyone else in and the guard complies. David throws Jim up against the wall and proceeds to beat the snot out of him, kicking him when he finally falls to the floor.

Next time, Veronica pretends to be sad about Maggie, Jeffrey extends an invitation to Justin, and David confronts Veronica about Maggie.