What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Anna looks for Lucy, and Valentin tells her, she said she wanted to take a bath and read Martin’s letter. Anna says she didn’t hear any water running, and goes to check, while Valentin looks outside. Anna comes back, and says, she’s not there, and Valentin says, dammit. He walks out into the night.
Lucy comes out of the MetroCourt elevator looking like a frumpy librarian from the 1930s. She sees Victor at the bar, and tries to jet, but bumps into someone. Before Victor can turn around, Spencer shows up, and says, just the man he wanted to see. Lucy slips into another dining area, and sees Maxie and Bobbie sitting at a table. Bobbie says she can only hope Lucy is somewhere smiling, knowing that the Nurses Ball can go on without her. Lucy is not smiling.
Josslyn asks if Dex has changed his mind about getting evidence on Sonny, and he says he wouldn’t go that far, but Sonny could have easily left him in that warehouse. Instead, Sonny came back and saved his life, so he’d by lying if he said it didn’t make him look at things… at Sonny differently.
In the living room with no TV, Willow tells Michael that she’s looking at wedding gowns on her tablet. Now that they’ve decided to postpone the wedding until after the transplant, she has time to order a custom gown. She wants to walk down the aisle to him in the perfect dress, looking strong and healthy. She wants to dance at their wedding, and wants to look forward to a long life together. He says he wants that too, and it’s going to happen. He kisses her, and she asks, how’s Aunt Liesl? He says, she’ll be cleared for the transplant in time; he knows it. She says she does too, when Drew walks in, and says, she wanted to see him? She says, there is something only he can help her with.
Sonny tells Nina that Carly brought Donna by, but unfortunately, she’s not staying. Nina says, because of her?
Willow asks Michael to leave, and he says, of course (🍷). She says, and no eavesdropping, but he says he’s a Quartermaine. Eavesdropping is kind of in his blood. In the foyer, Brook asks if everything is okay, and he says, damn good, but she says, it doesn’t look like it to her.
Carly says, it’s no secret she doesn’t want her daughter anywhere near Nina, but that’s not why she’s leaving. Sonny says he’ll tell her about it later, but let them go; he doesn’t want Donna to overhear. Carly calls to Donna, and Donna runs to Nina, saying, Auntie Nina! They hug, and Donna asks if Nina is here for a sleepover.
Dex tells Josslyn that Sonny saving his life doesn’t change the fact Sonny is breaking all kinds of laws with Pikeman; he’s talking federal laws. Just because he’s grateful to the guy… She says, doesn’t make him any less guilty, and he says, not for nothing, ex-service here. Violating the National Security Act goes against everything he fought and sacrificed for. She says, on the other hand… and he says he’s now in Sonny’s debt; something else he doesn’t take lightly. Doesn’t he owe Sonny? She says, no, and he wonders if he should tell Sonny what’s about to happen, but she says, if he does, he’ll be signing his own death warrant.
Valentin tells Anna, there are footprints in the snow outside Lucy’s window. She ran off while he was talking to Laura. Anna says, she’s unbelievable. This is all because of the Nurses Ball, and because Lucy can’t face that it’s going on without her. He says, why doesn’t matter at this point. Pack a bag; they’re going. She asks, where? and he says, they’re taking a ferry to Canada, go to Toronto, and take flight to Europe. He’s going to contact Laura and ask her what to do about Charlotte. It’s risky to take her, but he’s not leaving her if Victor thinks they’re alive. Anna takes the phone, telling him, stop. They can’t be sure Victor thinks they’re alive, and they’re not going anywhere.
As Lucy grabs a menu and sits down, Maxie says, the Nurses Ball is fully funded. Bobbie says, that means all the proceeds go to HIV/AIDS research and charities. Maxie says she was nervous. Lucy always said these backers were a tricky bunch, easily offended and hard to handle. Bobbie says she thinks Lucy – God rest her soul – had a tendency to exaggerate prepping the Nurses Ball. It made her seem heroic. Maxie says, that sounds like Lucy, and behind her menu, Lucy makes all kinds of faces. Bobbie says, they’re doing the job just as well as she did… maybe even better. Lucy looks like she might explode.
Victor says, it’s good to see Spencer. With Valentin gone, and Nikolas God knows where, the Cassadines have never been more vulnerable. Seeing Spencer renews his hope in the future; a future involving Spencer and his baby brother. Spencer says, that’s why he’s here. His little brother is in danger, and he needs Victor’s help to save him.
As she and Donna leave, Carly promises she and Donna will watch a movie and pop some popcorn. Nina asks Sonny, what just happened?
Drew says, whatever Willow needs his help with, she’s got it, but she says, he might want to find out what it is first. He says, no need. He’d go to the ends of the earth for her. She says, how about just to the end of the aisle? She and Michael decided to reschedule the wedding until after the transplant, when she’s recovered and hopefully in remission, so they can really celebrate. The only father she ever knew is dead, and she’d really love it if Drew would give her away at her wedding.
Michael tells Brook, overall, the news is good. Liesl Obrecht was on this blood medication, and they’re waiting for it to get out of her system. She’s a match to give Willow a bone marrow transplant, and they’re so confident it’s going to happen, they’ve rescheduled the wedding until after the transplant. Willow wants the wedding to be a real party, and wants to be done with the transplant and remission; he wants that too. But it all depends on Liesl and when she’s ready to donate. Willow could be too weak for it to work.
Josslyn says, if Sonny has any idea Dex has been working against him, he’ll kill Dex. Or more accurately, he’ll have somebody kill Dex. Dex says, she’s right. Tipping Sonny off is a bad idea. He really was doing Dex a favor by leaving him out of the planning. She says, Sonny gave him deniability, and Dex says he can’t warn Sonny without exposing himself. It’s harder than he expected. When he took this job, that’s all it was – a job. She asks how he even got hired, and he says he was working for a security firm; basically, private soldiers for hire. Mostly short-term jobs, two or three months at a time. They sent him on this interview, and the employer wanted someone like him. Young enough that Sonny could train him and take him under his wing. The job sounded interesting enough, and he liked the idea of being stateside and being undercover. Everything was going to plan until Josslyn busted him and Sonny beating up that tabloid reporter. Then everything got blown to hell. She says, sorry, but he says, never. When he started to invest in taking Sonny down – not as a job, but something that needed to happen – then at the warehouse when Sonny could have easily left him there – most employers would – Sonny personally rescued him. He hates feeling like he owes Sonny, but he does. She says she gets it. She owes Sonny too .He saved Dex, but telling him isn’t an option. Dex says, but if Sonny goes to prison, from evidence he secured, he’s going to feel pretty damn crappy about it. She says, there’s another option they discussed. He could disappear.
Valentin tells Anna, once Lucy is discovered alive, Victor is going to know they staged their deaths. What then? How long before Victor realizes Eileen Ashby has turned against him, and comes after them? She says, he doesn’t know Victor would try to kill him, and he agrees he doesn’t, but Victor would try to kill her, and he’s not going to let that happen. She says, he’s jumping to conclusions, and he asks, how? She says, the only thing they can be certain of is, Lucy left the safehouse. They don’t know where she is. They don’t know if anyone has seen her. He says, they don’t? She’s the exact opposite of discretion. She says, they certainly don’t know that Victor has spotted her. They can fix this. She can find Lucy, and bring her back. He asks if she’s out of her mind.
Maxie asks, what about the mistress or master of ceremonies? and Bobbie says, another area where Lucy might have exaggerated her own importance. She always did a terrific job, but there were so many times when the Ball threatened to cross over from charity gala to The Lucy Coe Show. Still listening in, Lucy looks aghast, and Maxie says, maybe they can divvy up the MC duties. Epiphany, Amy, and Felix could represent General Hospital; Ned and Brook could represent ELQ; and it would mean a lot to Liesl if she could be included. Lucy sticks her tongue out, and Bobbie says, it’s a gamble. Maxie says she’s aware of that, and Bobbie says, and there would be pushback. On the other hand, her daughter was Co-Chief of Staff. Maxie says, her fear is that Liesl will get up on the stage and completely lose control. Bobbie laughs, and says, just like Lucy did every year. She’ll be right back. She has to take a powder room break. Lucy hides her face with the menu as Bobbie goes past.
Spencer says, Esme seems determined to keep the baby with her in prison, and Victor says, proof of memory or no memory, she’s as selfish as she ever was, and spencer says, exactly. Which is all the more reason to get his baby brother away from her. Is that something Victor could accomplish with his connections? Victor says he’s sure something could be worked out, but he’ll be needing some guarantees in return. Bobbie walks up and says, Victor Cassadine. I’ve been meaning to have a word with you about my brother.
Anna readies her gun, and tells Valentin, she knows how Lucy thinks. She’ll be able to find Lucy and bring her back. Valentin tells her to listen to herself, but she says, they’ve come to far to jump ship right now. He asks, what’s wrong with her? She’s better than this. They’re professionals. When things go south, they walk quickly and quietly. She says, not this time, but he says, you don’t stick around, because sticking around gets you killed. She says, it’s too early to bail, and he says, she’s over-invested. She dragged Lucy into this; now she’s a liability. Anna screwed up and can’t own up to it. That’s what this is. She asks if he wants to stop his father, and he says, she knows he does. She says, well then, in her professional opinion, this is the best chance they have, and she’s going to see it through. So feel free to go back to Europe or wherever he deems safe. She slams out, and he upends the coffee table.
Bartender Jamie tells Maxie that hotel management has been trying to reach her. Apparently, there’s a problem at the Deception offices with the door alarm. Maxie tells him that Gladys never sets it correctly. She’ll take care of it. She walks out, passing Lucy’s empty chair.
Victor tells Bobbie, Luke’s passing was tragic, but that was more than a year ago. She says, as if she hasn’t been counting the days since he had her brother killed, and he says he did no such thing. She says, it never made any sense. Luke cheated death a million times. Then he dies in some supposedly random tram accident right about the same time Victor slithered back into town. He says, it’s hardly evidence of a crime, and she says she doesn’t have any proof, certainly nothing that would hold up in court, but she knows he did it, and one glorious day, he will pay.
Maxie makes a call to management and says, everything looks good in the office, and she reset the alarm. It’s all good. She hears something, and asks if anyone is here. A hand covers her mouth, and she elbows the assailant, then realizes it’s Lucy.
Drew says he’d be honored to walk Willow down the aisle, and she thanks him. He says he’s truly touched, and she says she just wants this wedding to be perfect. Michael’s been so wonderful through all this. He forgave her for keeping her diagnosis from him and he’s been taking such wonderful care of her; he deserves his happily ever after. Or at the very least, a kick-ass wedding reception. He says, that’s generous she wants that for Michael, but what about her? What does she want for her?
Michael tells Brook, right now, it’s a waiting game. Waiting to see how long it takes the blood thinner to get out of Liesl’s system. Waiting to see how long Willow can keep going. Everyone tells them to stay positive. What’s more positive than planning a wedding? It just feels like they’re pretending; burying their heads in the sand. The truth is, they just don’t know. They have no idea how this is going to play out, and he doesn’t know what to do. She hugs him, and he’s says he’s sorry, but she says, don’t be. He’s being strong for everyone else. He’s allowed to have a moment. He says, just one? and she says, as many as he needs. She sighs, and he says, what is it? She says she doesn’t want to add to his pressure, so tell her, and she’ll zip it. She’s just wondering, with all this uncertainty, is Willow more open to reconciling with Nina?
Nina asks Sonny, if Carly’s not the reason Donna can’t stay over, what is it? and he says he told her; it’s a business situation. She says she’s aware of that. She sees the bodyguards outside, and there are two bodyguards at her apartment following her every move. Sonny says, it’s gone further than that, and she asks, how much further? He says, she knows there was an attempt on his life. He just needs to be clear that he’s not a target; that he can keep the people he loves safe. Until then, his children aren’t going to be visiting him, and neither is she.
Drew says, this is Willow’s life. She should live it as fully and richly as possible. She says, that’s the plan, and thanks him. He asks what he did, and she asks where she starts. He’s been so kind to her, and such a rock for Michael. He’s been the best funcle Wiley could have. He says, funcle? and she says, fun uncle. In this very quiet but steady way, he’s become essential to the only real family she’s ever been a part of. He says, she has no idea how much that means to him, and she says, that’s why she wants him to be with her when she marries the man she loves. He kisses her forehead, and says, he’ll be there. She can count on him always. She says she knows, and puts her head on his shoulder.
Brook tells Michael, she’s not asking for Nina’s sake. She just thought it might help Willow to make peace with her mother. He says, when he was with Willow, he thought, please God, if Willow lives, let there be time for her to do what she wants, but if these are Willow’s last days, then she shouldn’t have to spend them trying to make Nina happy. Either way, it’s her decision, and he’s not going to try and influence her. He thanks Brook for trying to help, and she says, that’s all she’s trying to do. Not just for Willow, but for Sonny. It means so much to him, after all he’s done for her. He says he’s glad she can see the good in Sonny when he can’t. If Willow asks, can she tell Willow that he went to run an errand? She says, sure, and he leaves.
Sonny tells Nina, this is a precaution. He has no reason to think she or his kids are in danger. The reason he’s keeping them away is just for safety. She says she understands why he feels he has to do this for his kids, but she’s a grown woman and doesn’t like the idea of leaving him just because it’s dangerous. He says he thought she didn’t want to be part of this, and she says, believe her, she wants nothing to do with any of this, except for him; she wants everything to do with him. Because she loves him. He says he loves her too, and she says, if she can put up with the guards here and at her apartment, and knowingly accept the danger, then why can’t she stay? He says, just because she’s willing to accept the danger, doesn’t mean he has to accept it for her.
Dex says, he and Josslyn talked about this. If he disappears, Sonny will hunt him. That means he’d have to hide from everyone, including her. Unless she’s willing to come with him. She says, if it was just her, she would, but she has a family. Willow is sick, Michael needs her, and she has a niece and a nephew, and Donna and Avery. He says he gets it. She’s lucky to be so close with them. Don’t give them up. Ever. She says she doesn’t want to give him up either. She doesn’t want him to go into hiding, and doesn’t want him to betray Sonny. But most of all, she doesn’t want to be the reason he has to make this decision. Whether he stays or goes, he has to leave her out of it. He says, too late, and kisses her.
Maxie gives Lucy some water, and says she can’t express how happy she is that Lucy’s here. Maxie’s not entirely surprised. She is Lucy Coe. Lucy says, that she is, and Maxie says, there was a part of her that always held out hope. Lucy thanks her, and Maxie tells her, that being said, where has she been hiding this whole time? And did Lucy have to ambush her like that? Lucy says, that was the only way to save the Nurses Ball.
Valentin goes to the footbridge, and flashes back to telling Anna that she screwed up and won’t own up to it. Anna tells him this is the best chance they have, and she’s seeing it through. Carly appears, and says, isn’t he supposed to be dead?
Brook asks Willow how it’s going, and Willow says, Drew agreed to give her away at the wedding. Brook wonders if Willow thought he’d say no, and Willow says, no, but it’s nice to have that settled. She says, one more item off her to-do list, and Brook says she thinks Drew is an excellent choice. Michael told her that they’re rescheduling the wedding. Willow says, two weeks was never a realistic timetable. She just really wants to plan it out, so when it happens, she and Michael can enjoy themselves. Brook tells Willow that Michael went to run an errand, and Willow asks how Brook thinks Michael is doing. Brook says, great. He’s being a total rockstar. Willow says she can see how hard it is trying to maintain a positive attitude, and Brook says, it’s probably just as hard on Willow. Apparently, Willow’s illness makes her squint, which is really the only thing that seems different about her. She doesn’t even have circles under her eyes. I know you don’t always look sick when you are, but I would think if she only has days to live, she might look at least a little peaked.
Lucy closes Maxie’s office door, and says she really appreciates Maxie and Bobbie stepping up to steer the Nurses Ball. She also understands the urgency of it, since the 60th anniversary of the hospital is coming up. But Maxie clearly doesn’t know what she’s taken on. Maxie says, and that’s clear why exactly, and Lucy says, because the Ball is huge. It takes networking, and vison, and management. It just takes a special touch, that’s all. Maxie says, hers, and Lucy says, exactly. Maxie says, it’s really great that she’s not dead and all… Lucy says, that’s very sweet, but unfortunately, she has to stay dead. She has to stay in hiding. It’s a total drag. She can’t be as hands-on as she usually is, but that’s okay, because she has Maxie. Maxie is going to be her eyes and ears.
Victor says, if Bobbie is quite finished making these groundless accusations, he was in the middle of a conversation with his great nephew. Bobbie tells Spencer, these accusations aren’t groundless, and she believes in his heart of hearts, he knows that. Laura has never actually come out and told Bobbie that she thinks Victor had Luke killed. Probably for feat that Bobbie would go after him out of revenge on her own. But she and Spencer’s grandmother have known each other for most of their lives, and some things don’t need words to be conveyed. Laura thinks Victor is guilty. That’s why she wants Spencer to have nothing to do with him. Victor says, that’s quite enough. Leave the boy alone. Bobbie says, Luke is his namesake; he’s called Spencer after her brother. Spencer says he knows, and she asks how he can sit here with a murderer?
Valentin says he doesn’t suppose he can convince Carly that this is a massive hallucination, and she says, of all the dearly departed people in her life, he might be the last person on the list she’d want to conjure up. He says he’ll concede that point, and she says, so he didn’t die in a sewer in Paris. He says, catacomb, and she says, whatever. Still, a lot of trouble to go to, to fake his death. He says, it was a lot of trouble, and right now, he’s hoping it’s not all for nothing. Carly says, he needs to convince her to keep his secret. So start talking. He says, Victor Cassadine. He’s trying to prove his father killed her Uncle Luke.
Nina says, so Sonny’s wife died in an explosion, and he says, she was his pregnant wife, and she died in a car bombing that was meant for him. After that, he didn’t know if he wanted to live or die. He got himself together, and twenty years later, his son gets killed in a car bomb. She says, it must have been horrible, and he says he can’t… he won’t go through that again. He takes her hand, and says, the reason he’s asking her to go is because he loves her, and he doesn’t know what he’d do if he asked her to stay and something happened. She says she’ll keep her distance, and he thanks her. She says, promise her that he’ll figure this out. Promise her that they’ll have a future together. He says, she’s his future, they kiss, and she leaves, after taking a last look at him.
Willow tells Brook, she goes back and forth so often, she’s got whiplash. Once again, it’s everything is going to be okay. She’ll get the transplant, and they’ll live happily ever after. Brook says, and the next? and Willow says, she dies, and leaves Michael to raise their kids alone. He and Wiley will grieve her; Amelia will never know her. The prospect is utterly terrifying. Brook says, of course (🍷) it is, and Willow says, ironic, isn’t it? When she married Chase, it’s because they thought he was dying. Now she’s planning her wedding, and she’s the one who… Brook goes over to her, and says she’s not going to feed Willow some BS that everything’s going to be okay when she doesn’t know if it is: but there’s still a life-saving option on the table. She asks if Willow regrets marrying Chase, and Willow says she regrets the pain it caused; that she married Chase when she didn’t love him, because he’s so deserving of love. Brook says, he is, and Willow says, her turn to ask Brook a question. She still loves Chase, doesn’t she?
Lying on the sofa, Josslyn asks if Dex’s arm hurts, but he says, nothing hurts right now. He could just fall asleep with her. She asks why he doesn’t, and he says he has to go back to Sonny’s. She says, so he’s decided to stay, and he says he’s decided the only important thing in this whole mess is being with her. So he’s going to stay. He’s going to get evidence against Sonny, and give it to his boss. (Boo! Hiss!) She says she’d really like to know who this mystery boss is. First she’d thank him, or her, for bringing Dex to Port Charles. Then she’d slap them for paying him to risk his life instead of nailing Sonny themselves. He says, trust him. This person has only good intentions. She asks how he can be so sure, when there’s a knock at the door. It’s Michael, who says, open up.
Victor tells Bobbie to leave now, or he’ll have her escorted out, but Spencer says, it’s not necessary. He comes over to them, and says he’s sorry for Bobbie’s loss, and she’s entitled to her beliefs, but he’s willing to give his uncle the benefit of the doubt. Bobbie says, whatever Victor is offering Spencer in return for his loyalty, it’s not worth it. She walks out, and Victor says, his apologies for that unpleasantness. Now where were they? Spencer says, they were discussing how he can get custody of his younger brother. If that’s something Victor can help him with, Victor will have his full support.
Lucy tells Maxie that she has to call the best lighting director, picking up a pad and writing things down. She says, every great show has a great lighting director, and she’s sure Bobbie would never think of that. Maxie says, enough about the lighting, but Lucy says, the lighting’s very important. She’s putting it on the list. Is Maxie not listening to her? Maxie says she’s been listening. The thing that interests her the most is how Lucy’s been in hiding and presumed dead for months. Why? Who has she been hiding from? Anna walks in, and says, me, if she has any sense. Maxie laughs, and says, Anna. Yes, of course (🍷). Because Anna’s a fugitive, and is also standing in her office. Do either of them care to tell her what the hell is going on? Anna says, they don’t have the time. She points at Lucy, and says, you, with me, now.
Carly says she didn’t know Valentin was so attached to Luke that he’d be willing to disrupt his life this way. Valentin says, his father is a criminal. Luke is only part of the story. Victor has also framed Anna Devane for the murder of Lucy Coe. Carly says, so Anna was with him in Paris? and he says he can’t confirm who he’s working with, and she says, she caught him red-handed; now he’s stonewalling? Why should she trust him? It’s not like he’s a trustworthy guy. How does she know he’s not working with Victor? He says, maybe she doesn’t trust him, but maybe Drew will. They’re rivals in business, but they worked well together against his father when Victor held them captive in Greece. Drew steps onto the bridge and says he remembers that. Because of the hell they went through, he’ll hear Valentin out, but don’t waste his time with lies or anything else Valentin wants to feed him. He wants to hear the plan to take down Victor, and he wants to hear all of it.
Tomorrow, Valentin says they could use someone, presumably Drew: Drew tells Carly, the man has to be stopped, and he might have to do it; and Michael insists on talking to Dex.
Below Deck
Rodney Bay Marina, St. Lucia. Fraser is already scared of the new charter guests who are all bodybuilders and not smiling. Captain Lee welcomes them to the St. David, and says, Fraser will give the tour, then they’ll get underway. Katie says, they could eat her for lunch. The captain hopes they don’t f*** up getting off the dock, and tells the deckhands, all lines on board. In Captain Lee’s interview, he says, being out on the water is something magical, like Christmas morning. Camille texts Ben, saying, just a couple more days. Tony says they have a legend on the boat. Guest Dexter won Mr. Olympia, as well as winning the Arnold Classic five times. He’s the bodybuilder with the most wins. In Tony’s interview, he says, it takes sacrifice, discipline, and hard work. He respects Dexter big time. Ben tries to call Camille, but gets voicemail. In Katie’s interview, she says, when Ross is good, he’s amazing. She knows they have to go their separate ways at the end of the season, but at this point, she knows who Ross is. They’ll just have fun and leave it like that; living in moment. Primary Jolynn shows Hayley some bodybuilding photos, and tells her that she and primary Keith own a gym, and she runs it day to day. They anchor, and Camille texts Ben that he’s getting the best of her, since she doesn’t text. In Ben’s interview, he says his heart sinks thinking that they’re going to stop texting when they go their separate ways. He asks if that’s going to be the case, and she texts back that she doesn’t have the mental capacity for that conversation right now. In his interview, he wonders what that means. He doesn’t know where they are. Ugh. In Fraser’s interview, he says, the guests are the nicest people; he loves them. His first impression was wrong. They’re lovely and kind. The crew isn’t used to that. We flash back to some choice a-hole charter moments. He says, they’ve been through so much. They need a trip with wonderful people to end the season. Ross gets the toys in the water, and wings are served. They’re dry, and Dexter says, it’s not Popeye’s for sure. In Hayley’s interview, she says, she thinks Rachel has given up at this point. She tells Fraser, who says, it’s painful to hear. Probably more painful is that he has to relay this news to Rachel. He tells her that the guests thought the wings were a bit dry, and in Rachel’s interview, she says, this sucks. She doesn’t f***ing care. The job sucks, and she’s a tired fed-up bitch. She’s been doing this for 17 years, and she’s tired of the whole hoopla. Ben tells Katie about Camille’s text, and she calls red flag. In his interview, Ben says, something in the back of his mind says he’s not okay with what Camille said. He’s been heartbroken three times, and might be holding out on himself for nothing.
Captain Lee calls Ross and Fraser to the bridge, and asks, what’s the deal with tonight’s dinner? Fraser says, dinner is at 9, and the guests want some form of a bodybuilding competition. The captain jokes that they’re never seen him with his shirt off. In his interview, he says, his ass looks good, but he’s not participating. There’s only so much lipstick you can put on this pig. He tells Fraser that he wants service to absolutely crush it. The guests use the slide and the toys, and the trampoline blows back, knocking into Ben and Tony, who struggle with it. The captain tells them, once it gets airborne, it’s hard to get back. Rachel asks Fraser how he came out to his mom, and he says, there was a story on the radio about a murder, and his mom said, no matter what Fraser did, she’d still love him. He told her that he was gay, and she said she’d always love him. It was the most liberating moment in his whole life; it felt amazing. Keith asks the captain to have dinner with them, and Captain Lee says, it would be his honor. Ross says he’s not stripping to a speedo; this is insane. Ben pumps iron to prepare. In Ross’s interview, he says, his parents loved to travel. There were holidays where they didn’t know where they were going, and would choose at the airport. He thinks it rubbed off on him, since he liked to go where he felt like in the moment. At some point in time, he thinks he’ll settle down. Katie has a lot of things he’d like in a partner, but he’s not in that place. They’re on the no plan plan. Tyler tells Hayley that he’s going to call his mom, and she tells him to stand up for himself. If she doesn’t like it, it won’t be forever. She’ll accept it because she loves him.
The captain comes to dinner in full dress uniform, and in Rachel’s interview, she says, it’s the final charter, and her sh*t-o-meter is in the red. She needs to focus, and not sink like an anchor. She presents the dinner menu, and dinner is served. Captain Lee says, he, too, is a gym rat, and Keith says, he thinks every day spent in the gym is one less in the hospital. I’m pretty sure that’s a factor in why I don’t get sick often; I work out almost every day. In the captain’s interview, he says, they take it to another level. He just wants to look down and still see his shoes. In the galley, Rachel curses the pasta. Keith says his girlfriend is more jacked than he is; he has to work out harder. There’s an amazing chocolate cake for dessert, and Fraser congratulates Dexter on his career. He thanks Dexter for being amazing, and everyone applauds. The crew gets ready for the Buns & Guns Championship, and Fraser says he has to change into something bodybuilder-esque. In Hayley’s interview, she says, she’s got no guns, but she’s got a helluva lot of buns going on. Leigh-Ann oils down Ben, and Katie oils down Ross. Fraser welcomes the guests to their sorry attempt at a bodybuilding contest. They come out one by one – no one is in bad shape – and pose. Tony shows off his athletic prowess by doing handstands and yoga poses. Everybody lines up, and Dexter says, Katie is in 3rd place, Tony is in 2nd place, and Ross is the winner. That’s only because they don’t know him. Fraser says, they’re lovely. They’ve just got scary faces. Everyone goes to bed, and Leigh-Ann tells Ben that it’s frustrating. she wouldn’t mind exploring other things. He says he’s had a good time with Camille, but they’re not dating. She said she was excited to see him, but when he asked what happens after their trip, she said the conversation is too big right now. He and Leigh-Ann hug and go to bed, separately. I dunno. Camille might be a flake, but I don’t think that’s a conversation you should have through text anyway.
Ross asks Katie to haul the anchor, and in his interview, he says, it’s a big deal. When he looks back and reflects on the progression his team is making, he feels proud. Captain Lee tells them, let’s get this dog and pony show on the road. Hayley tells Fraser that the guests are lovely and so disciplined, and he says, their control is phenomenal. In Fraser’s interview, he says, going forward, he’s never going to judge a book by its cover. He’s so pleased these guests came on board. He asks if Rachel is having one last bitchfest, and she tells him to eat her cooter. In Katie’s interview, she says she never expected to haul anchor by herself. She definitely sees a future as a bosun on a 200 footer, so cool. She has the determined personality to get job done. In his interview, Captain Lee says, they’re coming to the dock, and it’s bittersweet. It’s the last docking, and he doesn’t want to f*** it up. He wants to look good, and wants the crew to look good. Now it’s up to them to do their job, and him to do his. You get a rush when it’s successfully done. The wind is blowing like a mofo, and when Ben throws a line, it doesn’t go far enough, and the guy on the dock misses. In the captain’s interview, he says, the first throw was as useful as a screen door on a submarine. To Ben’s credit, he retrieved it quickly, and nailed it on the second throw. No harm, no foul. The crew lines up for goodbyes, and Captain Lee says, they’re a motley crew, but he loves them. The guests all say they had a great time, and it was such a pleasure. Keith says, they come from a place of working their tails off to get somewhere in life, and he sees the same worth ethic here from everybody. He hands the captain the tip envelope, and says he hopes it puts a smile on their faces. The guests leave, and Captain Lee says, good job, and thanks them.
Leigh-Ann calls her brother, and says she likes a guy who’s in love with another chick, but she’s not here. Since Leigh-Ann comes from a line of awful people, he tells her, go for it, and she says she’s going balls to wall. The captain radios the crew to come to the Sky Lounge asap. He tells them, job well done. They’re a cohesive unit, and it meant the world to him that they made his life easier. And when he’s happy, everybody’s happy. They’ve made the most money collectively as a group than any other crew – $222,300 or $17K each. The crew did exceptional. They don’t get a quarter million because the guests like the way he puts on his socks. This charter’s tip was $20K or $1500 each. He tells them, have fun, but don’t embarrass yourself or the boat. Tyler calls him mom, and says he has a few things he wants to discuss. She tells him that she’s at granny’s, and he says, not now. Since she has mom radar, she says she’s his mother, and whatever it is, it will be fine. She loves him a lot. In Tyler’s interview, he says he thinks her being at granny’s was an indication not to do this over the phone, but his mom saying everything was okay was a relief. The crew gets ready to go out. Tyler tries different shirts, and Katie critiques – don’t like it, don’t love it, Fraser will kill you. Fraser tells Ben, looking back, he might think he should have taken the opportunity with Leigh-Ann, but I’m guessing this is less about opportunity and more about Fraser not liking Camille. They go to a restaurant on a cliff with a magnificent view, and toast to nothing specific. Tyler tells the group that he called his mother. He told her that they needed to have a serious conversation, and she said she loved him no matter what. Hayley asks how he feels, and he says, a lot better. Leigh-Ann and Ben step away, and in Ben’s interview, he says, it’s hard to hear the voice in his own head. He kisses Leigh-Ann, and at the table, Fraser says, they vibe. Ben suggests they see what happens, and they make out on the way back.
Back on the boat, Ross and Katie kiss. Leigh-Ann and Ben get in the hot tub, and Ben wonders, where is everyone? In Leigh-Ann’s interview, she says, she’s here. Everyone goes to bed relatively quickly, and Ross and Katie get busy. Ben tells Leigh-Ann that part of him wants to live in the moment, and he and Camille have no official status. She says, this is where it would happen if it was going to happen, and asks if he’s confused. They go into a guest cabin, close the door, and we hear kissy sounds.
In the morning, Hayley asks Ben if he and Leigh-Ann shagged, and he says, no, they cuddled. His heart lies somewhere else. Leigh-Ann says, he talked about Camille, and Rachel says she wants to go home bad. Katie says, it’s mimosa time. Ross asks what Tony’s career plans are, and Tony says he’d like to go with sailing. Ross says, it’s more wild and free. He wishes Tony well. In Tony’s interview, he says, he was challenged the entire season. He’s proud he got out of his own cocoon, and learned to let himself go. As he leaves, he yells, wakatta! He used this word with Ben earlier, so I look it up. It means I understand, or I got it. In Leigh-Ann’s interview, she says she thought Ben would open up. She enjoyed flirting with him and kissing him. She wants to know where his mind is at, and when she asks him, he says he likes her, but he’s following his heart. He agrees to stay in touch, and in her interview, Leigh-Ann says, Ben is everything a girl looks for, but he’s not available. She respects that. In Ben’s interview, he says, he gave in, but stayed true to his heart. He’s a hopeless romantic. Or maybe he’s just hopeless.
One by one, the crew say their goodbyes, and leave. In Leigh-Ann’s interview, she says she’s going home and having some fun, then back to the reality of being chief stew. Hayley doesn’t know how she feels, and in Tyler’s interview, he says he wishes he’d been on the boat longer. It’s a special bunch, and he hopes they’ll be friends after this. Mom and dad, I’m coming for you. We have a lot to talk about. He hopes there are happy tears. Fraser tells Hayley that she’s a phenomenal human being, and he loves her. She says, he’ll never know how much he helped her, and in her interview, she says she accomplished working her ass off with a smile on her face. She was also the glue to the family, and feels incredibly proud. In Ben’s interview, he says he feels guilty, but wants to know where he and Camille are going. He’s hoping to have the are we exclusive? conversation. He’s head over heels. It’s so embarrassing. Katie tells Captain Lee that she loved working with him, and he says she did herself proud. In Katie’s interview, she says, it’s been one helluva f***ing ride, and she loved every second of it. She hugs Ross, and in her interview, she says, in a perfect world she could see pursuing something with him. But he doesn’t have the commitment to be a successful boyfriend. They had fun. Miami out. The captain tells Ross that it was a pleasure having him; his leadership is remarkable. He asks, what’s the next stop? and Ross says, a two-week party in Fort Lauderdale. He’ll see the captain in Florida. In Ross’s interview, he says he has emotions for Katie. He’ll see what happens, but knows they have to be realistic; they lead two separate lives. It would be nice one day to settle down and have kids… and five wives. He’ll let fate decide.
Rachel tells Fraser that he got stronger and better, and in her interview, she says, it’s no longer fun. Being a chef is her life’s passion, but at the same time, she’s too old for this sh*t. Captain Lee tells her, always a pleasure, and she says she’s glad he came back. He says he’s going to miss her, and they hug. In Rachel’s interview, she says she needs a break or something. She’ll leave until she’s bored or landlocked. Until then, bye. The captain tells Fraser that he did an outstanding job, and in his interview, the captain says, Fraser dug deep. He had big shoes to fill, and did it admirably. Then, not being able to resist one last baseball reference, he says, Fraser stepped up the plate and knocked it out of the park. In Fraser’s interview, he says, it was a rocky road, but he’s come quite far, and got a happy ending. He laughs, and says, not with anyone on board though.
In Captain Lee’s interview, he says he hates to say goodbye. He’d stack this crew up against anyone. He’s going on 40 years, and has he seen some crazy sh*t? Is a 40-pound rabbit fat? We flash back over the years to some crazy sh*t, and he says, he’s been in situations he didn’t think they’d make it through. The season ending brings a void. Deciding to become a yacht captain was the best decision he ever made. We flash back to Captain Lee telling Kate that she still looks more like a guest than a chief stew, and some other special moments, like when he gave Eddie his stripes. He says he made a promise to come back; promise delivered. He wants people to look at the job he’s done and know that he set the bar high and kept it high. Goddam, what a ride. He doesn’t know what’s going to happen in the future, but the ocean is a part of him. And he’s still got the best goddam job in the world.
They didn’t have a preview, but on Watch What Happens Live, Andy said there would be a Captain Lee special next week.
⚓️ Please Don’t Go…
Apparently, the rumors of his retirement are greatly exaggerated.
👻 My computer finally gave up the ghost totally, and I’m still in the midst of recovery, or search and rescue, or something. So once again, I’ll be saving the awful people of Summer House for tomorrow. It will give you something to look forward to. That’s sarcasm just in case you weren’t sure. And they’re such a great combo platter with the awful New Jersey Wives.
👟 Just Doing It…
Same Bat time tomorrow for soap and what I said. Until then, stay safe, stay not making a you problem someone else’s problem, and stay not judging a book by its cover. Just because someone looks like they could eat you for breakfast, doesn’t mean they will.