What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Violet tells Greogry and Alexis that they have to find the perfect tree, and Gregory says, perfection is the enemy of the good. Violet asks what that means, and Alexis says, it means, sometimes when you’re looking for perfection, you miss something quite special. Violet says, okay. She’ll be on the lookout for a special tree.

Robert says he doesn’t get a tree himself, but he’s delighted Diane invited him to help pick out hers. She smiles at him.

Curtis says he’s got to hand it to Marshall. He can decorate the hell out of a Christmas tree. He and Portia have tons of ornaments between them, yet Marshall managed to get all of them on the tree. Marshall holds an angel ornament in his hand that says First Christmas, and Curtis asks if that one broke. Marshall says, just his heart. He recognized this ornament the moment he unwrapped it from the tissue paper. Curtis’s mama made this one their first Christmas together.

At an unidentifiable restaurant, Lucy sets down two drinks and says, something fruity and fun for her and something olive-y for Scotty. He says she sure knows what he likes, and she says, after their entangled history, she’d better. He says, with her busy schedule, he’s glad she could pencil him in, and she says she always makes time for him. He says he wishes Liesl would do that, but she’s running around from conference to conference. She’ll do anything just to stay away and forget about him, but he’s glad he has a friend like Lucy. They clink glasses.

Anna asks Dante why they’re meeting at the morgue. Is there another murder? He says, nothing like that. He just wants to keep it quiet. He got a look at the final arson report on her house. She asks if it was Charlotte.

Carly is doing work at a table in Kelly’s, when Brennan walks in. He says, they meet again.

Curtis says he’s surprised mom never told him that she made an ornament marking their first Christmas together, and Marshall says, they were newlyweds. He had a great gig with a club band, so he was out late most nights. They managed to get themselves a tree, but he was always too busy to help decorate it. Christmas Eve rolls around, and he comes home to find the tree strung with lights, but just one ornament is on it. He figured, she mad now. He started apologizing, promising to stay up late and do whatever she needed him to do, but she said, no, no need. Curtis’s mama liked that tree just like that. This tree here is a beaut, but that first tree with this one ornament, that was the best tree he’d ever seen. He hangs the angel in a prominent spot.

Lucy says, what she loves about Scotty is, he doesn’t judge her; he never has. He sees her core and doesn’t judge her heart or her soul. Although he has judged several of her relationships. He says, like she hasn’t judged his, and she says, that’s because she just wants what’s best for him. So if it couldn’t be her… He says, go on, and she says, it could have been. They tried, on the legit end of the downlow, but that stupid, stupid affair did cost her relationship with Doc. Such a messy scene that upended everything. It was such a wake-up call, and she did have to reevaluate her life. She thinks that’s why they know they make better friends than lovers. He says, they have changed course a few times, and she says, several times, but somehow, they still stay connected… because of their daughter. By the way, has he heard the latest on Serina?

Violet calls Gregory to look at a tree, and Alexis says she’s going down another aisle to see if she can find something special. Alexis sees Diane telling Robert that she thinks it’s this one. Imagine this tree covered in lights, lots of ornaments. He asks if she’s got all that, and she says, absolutely. He says, what about mistletoe? and pretends to hold some over her head. They see Alexis and everyone says hi. Robert says he’s here with Diane to select a Christmas tree, and Alexis says, that’s new. She doesn’t recall Diane ever having a tree. Robert says he thought she said she had one every year, but Diane says, she told him that she thinks of having one every year, but this year, she’s following through. It’s the start of a new tradition; one of many, she hopes. Violet and Gregory come around the corner, Violet saying, come on, let’s go this way. Gregory sees Diane and says, what an unfortunate coincidence running into her.

Brennan asks if he can join Carly, or is she too busy? She says she can take a break and tells him to have a seat. He sits down, and she asks if he’s here for another burger, but he says he’s going to try the BLT. He’s heard raves about it. Carly says, it’s the house specialty. Does he want fries or coleslaw with that? He says, fries, of course (🍷), and Carly calls the server over, and tells her, this gentleman would like the BLT with fries. She asks if he wants a shake, because their shakes are legendary, but he says, water’s fine. He has to cut the calories somehow. The server leaves, and Carly asks how he’s enjoying Port Charles.

Dante says, there’s nothing in the report that ties Charlotte to the fire, and Anna says, thank God. He says, it’s a huge relief, and she agrees. She says, any indication of who’s responsible? and he says, they have pinpointed another suspect. She says, let’s hear it, and he says, the morning after the fire, evidence was found in the bushes outside her house, scraps of fabric. They tested positive for the same accelerant used to start the fire. She says, so the arsonist leaving the scene would have caught their garments on the hedge or something, and he says, they were also able to lift DNA from the fabric. They match the late Jameson Forsythe.

Violet asks why it’s unfortunate to see this lady, and Diane tells Robert that she thinks she’s had enough tree shopping for tonight. Besides, it’s a little chilly out. Robert says, they’ll find something to warm her up, and they tell everyone goodnight. Violet asks, who is that lady? and Alexis says she was going to inspect some trees down there. Does Violet want to scope them out first? Violet says, sure, and skips off, Gregory telling her to stay where they can see her. Alexis asks Gregory, was that really necessary?

Robert asks what that was all about, and Diane says she’s representing the family that’s suing General Hospital for malpractice. He says, so what? Everyone is entitled to representation. It’s nothing personal. Diane says, it gets personal when the doctor at the center of the lawsuit is your son, and Gregory Chase’s son is Dr. Hamilton Finn. He says she had more tact than Professor Chase, and she thanks him for noticing. He says he promised her something warm. Let’s go.

Anna tells Dante, so Forsythe would have set the fire, thinking the last copy of the mission report was in her house, but he couldn’t be certain of that, so he would have kept her under surveillance and would have seen her and Robert move the trunk to Maxie’s apartment. So Forsythe would have been watching the night that Charlotte was shot? Dante says, he was probably waiting for the cops and everyone to leave and the apartment was empty, to go in and get the report and any supporting evidence. She says, now that Forsythe is dead, murdered, what happened to the report?

Brennan says, Port Charles has definitely surprised him, and Carly says, in what way? He says, the cuisine, obviously, and she says, obviously. He says, and the people seem friendly, and she says, they’re pretty friendly, for the most part. He says he’s enjoyed getting to know the city. He runs through the park every morning past the Port Charles Museum. She says, The Chuck. That’s what the locals call it. He thanks her for the correction and says he hasn’t had a chance to visit yet, but he plans to make time for it. She asks how long he’s staying in Port Charles, but he says he’s not sure. As of right now, his visit is open-ended.

Marshall says, mama never told Curtis that story? and Curtis says, maybe it made her miss Marshall too much. Marshall says he’d hate to think he ruined Christmas for Curtis’s mother, but Curtis says, he didn’t. He told Marshall that when they got the tree. Christmas was mom’s favorite time of the year. He remembers she would wait until December 1^st before she’d start decorating, but when she did, look out. She went all in: garlands, ribbons, wreaths, Christmas music from Mahalia Jackson to The Jackson 5, Bing Crosby to Aretha, and 24/7 music. He does believe that’s why he loves Christmas so much to this day. That’s when mama was always her happiest.

Lucy says, even though she was the surrogate and didn’t give Serina her biology, she feels deep down she gave Serina part of her spirit heart, and Scotty says, it sounds like something New Age. What he does know is, they really made a great kid. Lucy says, they literally did, when her phone chimes. She says, remind her not to take any text from work, because Tracy Quartermaine being involved with Deception is the absolute worst thing that could possibly happen. Scotty says he’s really sorry Lucy gave away all of her stock at Deception, including the tie breaking vote with ELQ, and Lucy says she’s really sorry too. But sometimes you have to sacrifice for those you love, and she, Maxie, and Sasha are not taking any salary right now to make sure they don’t have to lay off any of their staff. He says, Dominique was Serina’s biological mother. She was all heart, but he thinks Lucy is right. He thinks Serina did get her spirit heart.

Portia walks into the house on the phone, and says she looks forward to getting all the details. She asks if Curtis and Marshall decorated the tree. It’s so beautiful. Curtis says, she can credit pops with most of it. He even managed to get both their ornaments on this one tree. She says she sees, and she’s in awe. It even smells like Christmas around here. Marshall says he’s pleased she likes it. And if they’ll excuse him, he’s stepping outside to get a breath of fresh air. Curtis says, it’s kind of cold out, but Marshall says he likes the cool. Portia tells him that there’s a throw on the chair, but he says he’ll be fine and goes outside. She asks if Curtis and his dad had fun decorating, and Curtis says, yeah. Like he said, his dad did most of the work. He just kept Marshall company. They reminisced. Pops told him a great story about this one. He shows her the angel ornament.

Outside, Marshall sits down. Irene sits next to him and says, he should use that blanket. He’ll catch his death out here.

Scotty says he loves that Serina is running around Florida saving all the manatees, but he hopes she settles down one day and maybe he gets a little grand toddler to bounce on his knee. Lucy says, don’t tell anybody, but he really is an old softie, and he says, she wouldn’t want to be a grandmother? She says she’d have to wrap her mind around it… She doesn’t think she’d mind because she likes the age she is right now. She kind of likes the hard-earned wisdom, and she really is becoming the woman she wants to be. She knows who she is and she certainly knows what she wants. But that doesn’t change the younger Lucy who was fearless and curious about everything, and who saw endless possibilities. Or the thirty-something Lucy, who actually relished being in her bra and panties in front of everybody at the Nurses Ball. He says, she liked being half-naked up there? and she says she didn’t at first. She was kind of mortified, but by the third or fourth time – don’t tell a soul – but she just pretended to be embarrassed, because she knew she looked damn good. He says, yes, she does.

Gregory tells Alexis, Finn did nothing wrong. The Muldoon family is already grieving their loss. The last thing they need is some lawyer swooping in to make a buck. She says she’s going to stop him right there. Diane is a shark, but she’s not a vulture. She’s also not the attorney who filed this suit. She’s a litigator. She’s a trial attorney and she took over this case because it went to trial. She’s also on retainer with the Muldoon family, so she has a legal and financial responsibility to look out for them. And quite frankly, from the facts of this case, she’ll probably win.

Brennan says he has a complex business situation that he has to untangle and get up and running, and Carly asks what kind of business he’s in. he says he’s a security consultant. He sets up security systems, both cyber and the real world, everything from individuals to large companies. She says, so he used to be a spy, and he says he could tell her, but then he’d have to kill he. She laughs, and he says, in all seriousness, why would she think that? She says, because her ex-husband uses a security consultant, and he used to be a spy. Seems to be where all the best security people learn their craft. He says, in his case, she’s mistaken, but he’s still really good, and she says, ex-military? That would be the same thing, right? Diane and Robert walk in, and Carly says she’ll be right back. She asks how Diane is, and Diane says, in desperate need of hot chocolate. Carly asks Robert, how are things? and he says, busy. Never a dull moment. They’d like two beverages to go. They’re planning on an excursion. Carly tells them, right this way, leading them to the counter. She says, one hot chocolate for Diane, and coffee for Robert? but Robert says, hot chocolate. He’s actually quite fond of it. Diane says, but don’t let it get out. It will ruin his carefully crafted grouchy image. Brennan glances over at them, obviously not wanting to be seen.

Dante says, so Forsythe was obviously a pro. There’s no way he keeps that report on his person. Anna says she doesn’t think for one second that he would have destroyed it. He wasn’t the only person involved in the op. He would have kept that for leverage. He says, or insurance, and Anna says, like she did. She doesn’t think Forsythe acted alone. Someone else is involved, she knows it. He says he thinks she’s on to something here, when the M.E. walks in. He says, if they’re here to view Jameson Forsythe’s body, it’s gone.

Gregory asks if Alexis believes Finn committed malpractice. He thought they were on the same page with this. She says, he knows how much she loves his son, and she thinks he’s an excellent doctor, but she’s looking at this from a legal perspective. And there’s a strong argument to be made that he should have pushed for more testing when Muldoon first came to see him. Gregory says, doctors test based on symptoms presented. Of course (🍷) there’s tons of tests he could have run, but are they practical medically, not to mention financially? She says, again, she’s not saying Finn is guilty. She’s saying there’s an argument to that effect and Diane is going to make that, because that is the way the law works. He says, spoken like a former legal eagle, and she says, yes. Facts and testimony matter greatly, but in the end, it’s the attorney that makes the most compelling argument to the jury. And yes, she used to be an attorney and she misses it.

Lucy thanks Scotty for the compliment. He’s always been such a sweet talker. But with his rakish good looks and his pocket squares, she thinks he could be the next Golden Bachelor. He says, maybe if the contestants looked like her, but she says she wouldn’t. She thinks this is just all about him being at loose ends over Liesl. He says he’s not here to sing the blues. What’s going on with her? Why is she flying alone?

Marshall tells Irene that Curtis says Christmas was still her favorite time of year. He’s glad that his leaving didn’t change that. That’s what he regrets, missing all those Christmases with her and the boys. Why did he ever leave?

Portia says, mulled wine, huh? Did Curtis make this or did Marshall? Curtis says he put out the wine while dad was trimming the tree, and she says, they make a very nice team. This is a very welcome end to a long, long day. He says he can have one of these waiting for her every night from now until Christmas, and she says, be careful. He doesn’t want to start spoiling her now, but he says, that’s the plan. It’s a ramp up until her real Christmas present. She says, mysterious. She likes it. She may have something special for him, but it’s not a present. It’s the chance to walk again.

The M.E. tells Dante that he can’t stand when these agencies just swoop in here, no warning, demanding this and that, going through his records. Dante asks what agency he’s referring to, and he says, the WSB. They took Forsythe’s body, the autopsy, and all the related reports. Dante gets on his phone and tells Anna, they classified the arson report. He can’t even access it. Anna says she assumes he went old school and made a copy, but he says, no, he didn’t. He didn’t have time. What about the M.E.’s autopsy notes? Does he have those? The M.E. says, they took everything, but it’s interesting he mentions an arson report. The victim had a partially healed burn on his left leg.

Carly asks if Diane and Robert are headed to Christmas festivities, and Diane says, they just came from Rice Plaza. If she’s planning on getting her Christmas tree from the Port Charles Pioneers, hurry, because they’re going fast. Carly asks if they have good ones, and Diane says, they do. She found a good one, but the shopping trip was cut short by work complications. She’s going to have to circle back. Carly says, that’s too bad, and Robert says he did offer her a consolation walk in the park. It’s all nicely lit up, very festive. The city tree isn’t let yet, but… Carly says she thinks it sounds romantic, and Diane chuckles. Carly thanks them for stopping in, and they thank her and leave. The server tells Carly that Brennan’s order is up, but when Carly goes to give it to him, he’s gone.

Lucy tells Scotty that she’s the one who’s been ignoring Marty. She’s been so focused and all-consumed about Deception; she just feels awful about it. Scotty says, why? She’s a busy person. Martin should be paying attention to her. She says, he’s attentive and everything. She’s the one who has limited availability. He asks why she should go out of her way. Martin should be paying attention to her at all times. He would be.

Curtis says he’s sure Portia means well. He just doesn’t want to get his hopes up for some Christmas miracle. She says she completely understands that. Of course (🍷) not. But please hear her out. She sets their glasses on the side table, and says she came across this study on an experimental procedure, and one of the subjects was a man paralyzed from the waist down. After the procedure, this man could walk with full body support in only eleven days. He asks if she’s saying this is a possibility for him.

Marshall says, Irene begged him not to go. Said she’d stand by him no matter what, but he wouldn’t listen. He left her and his boys. Told himself that he was sparing his family from his illness. Maybe he was just sparing himself from being less than in her eyes. It was all a lie, a misdiagnosis. He starts to cry and says he never had schizophrenia. And he’s so sorry. He’s just so sorry. He sobs, and Irene gently turns his face to her and says, Marshall Ashford, you have been given a gift. You have a clean bill of health and you reconnected with your son. Why do you waste one more second looking back at something that can’t be changed instead of living the life you have now? It’s beyond her.

Alexis says, just so Gregory understands, she’s Team Finn. In fact, she helped Martin prepare him for his deposition earlier. He says, she did? How did it go? She says she didn’t pull any punches. She played Diane’s part. She was opposing counsel. He says, no wonder she argued there was a case to be made by Diane, and she says, yeah. She thinks Finn is more prepared now. She has to confess she rather enjoyed it. Cross-examining him, trying to trip him up, finding the weaknesses in his testimony… Gregory says, being ruthless, and she says, with a purpose. She was using the skills she spent all those years developing. He says, back on that judiciary bike. Riding it with the wind to her back. She says, it’s hard to believe she’s not going to practice law ever again, and he says he’s sorry. He knows how it is, being confronted with something you used to be great at when you can’t do it anymore. She says she’s sorry. He wins. She promises not to complain or pine away over her career loss again, but he says he’s not comparing losses. He’s just saying he understands. He knows she was an excellent lawyer. She thanks him, and leans over to see Violet standing near a tree. She asks if that’s the one.

Dante says he doesn’t remember a burn being mentioned, and the M.E. says, a lot was happening at the time. Dante flashes back to the M.E. saying there was a bruise on Forsythe’s left heel; it wasn’t new and didn’t come from the vehicle striking him. Dante remembers being given the key from Forsythe’s shoe, and tells the M.E. that his partner was able to get a match on the guy’s fingerprints. Anna asks how old he thinks the burns were, and the M.E. says, between three and four months. Dante thanks him for taking the time to meet with them. They appreciate it. He’d also appreciate it if the M.E. wouldn’t mention this to anyone. The M.E. says, what would be the point? He has no proof. The WSB took it all, which is a gross abuse of power. He’s never seen anything like it. He works with federal and state agencies all the time. None of them swoop in and take what they want with impunity like this. He sure hopes someone can rein them in. He leaves, and Dante asks what Anna thinks. She says she thinks someone’s gone to a great deal of trouble to clean this up.

Brennan walks into Kelly’s and Carly says, he’s back. He says, sorry about that. He holds a bouquet of flowers behind his back, and she says she never pegged him for the dine and dash type – or more accurately the order and dash – but people can surprise you. He says he got an overseas call, and the reception was dicey. He needed to call back on his satellite phone, which he realized he left in his hotel room. So he left, fully intending to return and pay for his meal. And on the way back, he saw these. He shows her the bouquet and says he hopes she accepts them with his apologies.

Irene says, worrying over things that happened 30 or so years ago won’t change anything, and it won’t absolve him of a thing. But the here and the now, that’s what matters. The only thing the past can do for you is let you learn from it, so you don’t make the same mistakes going forward. He says, what do you do with the feelings? He left her and her boys. He starts to weep again, and she says, let it go. She was angry and hurt at first, but she didn’t let it stop her from living her life. She had a lot to figure out. She struggled some, but she enjoyed life plenty. Her boys were a handful, but they were her pride and joy, and she still managed to have a full life. He touches her face, and she says, and yes, she missed him, and she thought about him all the time. But she didn’t let herself worry, waste her life thinking about what could have been. She lived her life, and she loved living it. And that’s what she wants for him. He’s safe. He’s alive. Be thankful for the life he’s had with his beautiful family, their family. Their son needs him, and Marshall is right here for him. Isn’t that something? She’s so thankful for that. Isn’t he? He nods, and she says, he may not have been here in the past, but he’s here now. So enjoy this Christmas and every Christmas to follow, and she’ll be right here enjoying it with him. That’s the best gift he can give her. She squeezes his hand and disappears. He feels the air where she was, kisses his hand, and looks up.

Portia tells Curtis, this procedure is in the very early stages of human trials, but as soon as she read it, she knew he’d be the ideal candidate. Before he was shot, he was in perfect health, great physical condition. And she hopes he doesn’t mind, but she submitted his name and medical records. Before he gets mad, she just heard back. They’re considering him to be part of a trial. He takes an audible breath and asks why she would submit his name without telling… He’s got it. She didn’t want to get his hopes up. She says, again, this is in the very early stages, and there’s no guarantee he’ll be able to walk again. But this is a chance. He thanks her, and she kisses him.

Lucy says, Scotty knows she appreciates getting attention from him, as long as they maintain their boundaries. He says he still feels that spark between them. Does she? She says, nostalgia. He’s feeling nostalgia. She thinks they’re both feeling nostalgia. They can’t deny their past and they’ll always be connected because of Serina, but she’s with Marty, and he’s hoping to get back with Liesl. It could happen, and if not, she’s sure he’ll find someone very wonderful to be with. She has to go. She thanks him for the conversation and the drink. If he hears from their daughter, please remind Serina to call her mom when she hits dry land. He says, okay. He’ll catch her later. She says, of course (🍷) he will, and she leaves.

Violet tells Gregory that she felt the needles and they’re not dry. It’s fresh. He says, good, and she says, it’s not too tall, but it’s tall… and nice with no bald spots. Alexis says she doesn’t see any, and Gregory says, now if they can just track down a salesperson. Violet says, but she doesn’t want this one, and Alexis says she thought Violet liked it. Violet says she does, but it’s too pretty. Someone else will want it. She wants to find a tree that’s not so pretty, but special, and give it a home. Gregory says, sounds like a plan. Why don’t they look down that aisle there?

Carly says she appreciates Brennan’s apology, but the flowers weren’t necessary. He says, they’ll just go to waste in his hotel room. Won’t she accept them? Come on. They’ll add a little more Christmas cheer to the place. She says, okay, and thanks him. His food had to be wrapped up and she’s sending it to the homeless shelter, but she’ll put another order in for him. She sets the flowers by the sink, and he says, let’s save that order for another day. He’s in the mood for something a little more elevated. Can he take her out to dinner? She thanks him, but says she’s seeing someone, and he says, of course (🍷). Why wouldn’t she be? It’s his loss. He puts some money on the counter and says it should cover his bill. He heads for the door, and she says, he didn’t come here for the BLT, did he? He says, no, but he’s glad he came. He leaves, and looks in the window, smiling at her as he passes.

Anna says she thanks Dante for everything he’s done, but she’ll take it from here. He asks what she’s talking about. He’s not dropping out of this. She says, Forsythe came for the report because he’s named in it. Then someone else wanted him and the report eliminated, someone who’s probably incriminated in the report also. And whoever it is, they’ve got a lot of power and enough resources to murder Forsythe, disappear the body, classify any mention of it, so they can’t access it. He says, right. We’re looking for someone high up in the WSB food chain who was there on the day of that blown op. She says, not we, me, and he says, she’s a loose end too. He’s not letting her do this on her own. She says, but it’s her past. She’s not going to put anyone else she cares about in danger. It’s cost her too much. So she’s good. She’ll just handle this alone. She thanks him and leaves. He takes the bag with the key in it out of his pocket.

Tomorrow, Chase says he and Brook have an announcement to make; Lois and Olivia agree something is a disaster; Violet picks her Christmas tree; and Tracy is in shock about something.

Southern Charm

Montego Bay, Jamaica. Craig video chats with Paige and says he wants to the go the blue hole. There’s also a waterfall and rapids, and he’s left it up to the group which they want to do. Madison talks to Brett, who’s going snowboarding, and Madison says, she’s going cliff jumping. So heh. Whitney brings Shep coffee, and Shep says he’s not disappointed in their accommodations. Whitney says, when he was a kid, his best friend was Jamaican. He spent his summers here. His first stepdad was related to Ian Fleming who wrote the James Bond novels here. He tells Shep that he got lost finding his room last night, and Shep says, he came down for a nightcap and saw Taylor and JT walking the other way. We see a clip of them together, and Shep says, if they hooked up, he feels sad for her. Whitney laughs and Shep says he has nothing against JT… Whitney says, it would be a revenge ploy, and Shep says, single Taylor is a dangerous woman. In Shep’s interview, he says, Taylor’s of the ilk that thinks she needs a guy, but that’s a whole other discussion. He tells Whitney, it’s time to be more like Paige, and Whitney says, the whole purpose of the trip was to introduce Paige and see how she could integrate with Craig’s friends. In Whitney’s interview, he says, Craig is delusional. He thinks the world is flat. Shep says he has no faith in any relationships anymore.

At the pool, Taylor gets a text that seems disturbing, and Madison comes out, sitting on the chaise next to her. We hear crickets for a while, then Madison says, it was funny running into Taylor and JT. In Taylor’s interview, she says she and JT have a good time. He makes her laugh, but she feels like he’d be a lot to handle. She tells Madison that they grabbed a drink or ten and chatted until 4 am, and in Madison’s interview, she says she doesn’t see them together. Maybe Taylor thinks he’s her only ally. She’s been on the outs with people in the group and it’s not a good feeling. Madison says she and Taylor haven’t spoken since JT’s dinner, and we flash back to Madison being ripping Taylor a new one. Madison apologizes to Taylor, and says she was getting fed things about Taylor that didn’t match up with what she’s known and seen. Taylor says she appreciates it. She’s going through a tough time. Madison says she thinks Taylor is a good person, but hates Taylor’s part in hurting Olivia. Taylor says she’s apologized multiple times, but it keeps coming up. A friend just texted her about a Page Six article that says she and Austen hooked up. We see the headline, and in Taylor’s interview, she wonders why someone has to stir the pot. She tells Madison that they find something else to talk about, and it comes back to her again. Olivia sees the article and says, what the f***? In Olivia’s interview, she says she’s taking a trip to get things off her mind, and someone sent her a Page Six article about Austen and Taylor. She hasn’t even had coffee yet. Here’s a thought. Coffee first, phone later.

The group meets in the lobby, and in her interview, Taylor says, clearly, Olivia saw the article and she knows Olivia is upset. In Olivia’s interview, she says, of course she’s upset, and in Austen’s interview, he says, this is his nightmare right now. Craig announces that those going to the blue hole, hop on the bus in the front. If they’re going with Shep’s locale of choice, get in the bus in the back. Shep says, they’ll meet afterward, and Craig says, they won’t be far from each other and there’s an awesome restaurant nearby. They get in the buses, and in her interview, Olivia says, does she want to get in the bus with her ex best friend and ex-boyfriend, or the bus with the bus with her ex best friend’s two exes? Door number two please. They roll out, and in the Shep bus, Madison says, this is her last hurrah. She and Brett are going to start trying to have a baby. Austen says he thought she was adamant about not having another child, but Madison says, Brett is the most fabulous guy on earth (I’m paraphrasing), so why not give him a child? Austen says, she didn’t want to give him a child, and she says, he is a child and she couldn’t take care of two. Madison talks fertility, and it has to be explained to Austen that every chicken egg doesn’t make a chicken. In Austen’s interview, a producer tells him that eggs have to be fertilized first. I understand Austen’s puzzlement because a lot of people have it. We raised chickens when I was a kid, and no, you won’t get an egg with an embryo inside when you buy a carton at the store, like some people will tell you. Craig asks, who else is getting pregnant? and Austen hopes nobody.

On the other bus, Shep asks how JT’s night ended. Where did he and Taylor go? JT says, they played ping-pong, and proceeded to drink until 5 am. Shep asks if they retired to their own rooms, and JT says, they did. Shep asks if he’s sure about that, and JT says, if Shep is asking if they hooked up, it’s a no. In JT’s interview, he says, Shep likes to fish, but once the fish is off the line, it’s no longer his business where the fish sleeps. Taylor is a grown woman and makes her own choices. Once again, JT proves what little respect he actually has for women, comparing Taylor to a fish. Everyone is checking their phones, and it seems the Page Six article is flying around. In Venita’s interview, she says, the Band-Aid keeps getting ripped off. Just when the wound is about to heal, Page Six says, I’ll take that. In Austen’s interview, he says he’s finally in a good place with Olivia, when the article drops. And it’s not like there’s any new information. In Shep’s interview, he says, it’s upsetting because it makes it more real when you read something you already knew. They’re trying to heal, and it opens the wound. The article says that Shep is supportive of Austen and Taylor, and Shep says, it makes him sound like a p*ssy. Olivia says, maybe he is, and Shep asks what he should do. Should his position be all fire and brimstone, and should he never speak to Taylor again? He’s worried about Taylor’s trajectory in life. He wants to help her weather the storm. Venita says, she set up the rainfall, and in her interview, she says, Shep doesn’t need to protect her. It’s not his role anymore. Let it go. Olivia says, the whole town thinks they had sex, and Venita says, she trusted both individuals who betrayed her. Shep says, Taylor texted, asking if he wanted to hang out. When he said he thought it would be a bad idea, she said, fine, she’d hang out with Austen instead. Olivia says, Taylor is using Shep to heal, and he says, it’s pure immaturity. Olivia says, it’s a character flaw, and Shep says, it’s complicated, but Olivia says, it shouldn’t be.

Dunn’s River Falls. This place looks incredible, and Shep says, it’s like a waterpark. Guide Andre tells them that they’re 600 meters above sea level. Stick close, be safe, and put on water shoes. He asks if they’re ready for fun and does a bird call. They mess around at a whirlpool, do some climbing, and take photos. In Shep’s interview, he says he thinks JT might be water repellent. He’s definitely not amphibious. He points out that a scene from Cocktail was filmed there.

Island Gully Falls. Another magnificent spot. Guide Sam gives the group water shoes, and in Madison’s interview, she says she’d rather step on a rusty nail than wear those shoes. They’re horrible. The sound and texture and water between her feet is gross. Sam shows them a platform they can jump from that’s 12 feet above the water, which is 30 feet deep. In Craig’s interview, he says he doesn’t like heights, but you have to get outside your comfort zone. He wants to do what he can to take the focus off the betrayal they’ve surrounded themselves with. In Madison’s interview, she says, jumping into the blue water feels like Tomb Raider, but she’s about to have another baby, so she’s going to have best time of her life.

Craig has ordered fish for the blue hole crew, and Taylor eats a fish eyeball. In her interview, she says, it tastes tough and chalky. She’s an adventurous eater. Rocky Mountain oysters… If you know you know. They go to the beach, where JT continues to wear his baseball cap even in the water. Ugh. He tells Rod that it’s a nice way to rest before tonight. Last night was hard. We flash back to the uncomfortable dinner, and JT says, when your face is on a national thing for being a d-bag, you have to make a change. Rod thinks JT has a chance with Taylor. Not after she sees this show he doesn’t.

Taylor tells Austen that she wakes up and sh*t is out on the internet and Olivia is pissed at her. She wonders if it’s that or Olivia just hates her. She’s tired of them both being the literal topic of conversation for two months. Austen says, she didn’t talk to him either, and he’s sick and tired of feeling like he did things wrong at every turn. Taylor says she’s thought it over and doesn’t know what upset Olivia. Austen calls Craig over and asks what the tone was last night with Olivia. Craig says he thinks Olivia is terrified to let them back in, and then find out more than a kiss happened. Madison suggests setting the record straight. Taylor says, they’ve talked for months, and Madison says, or tell them to STFU, get over it, or don’t. Taylor tells her, that’s what they’ve been saying. There’s nothing else to do. It makes her question if they were friends to begin with. Friends don’t treat you that way. Craig says, she hooked up with Olivia’s boyfriend, and Taylor says, people have betrayed her and she didn’t react that way. Craig says, everyone handles it differently. What is her goal? To be cordial and civil again? Taylor says she’d love to be friends again, but Craig says, he doesn’t think she can be friends with both Austen and Olivia. Sometimes you have to break up with people. The only way to move forward – he’s just the messenger – is to tell the truth. If they’re saying the truth is already out there, they’re at a standstill. Until they tell the truth, according to Olivia, she’s done with them.

Craig says, the restaurant they’re going to is Miss T’s, and it’s true, authentic, and awesome. It’s super cute, and the tables are covered with colorful scenes. I wonder if I could buy one. The blue hole group gets there first, and Craig orders all the appetizers, saying he’s a big apps guy. The other bus arrives, and Leva calls Olivia, so she stays on the bus to talk. She tells Leva that everyone is asking if she’s okay except the people involved. Everyone is saying they fully hooked up. She saw things they said, and the timeline doesn’t match up. In the first conversation she had with Taylor, Taylor said it was after New York, but the headline said it was recently. Leva tells her to talk to JT. She’s so angry at the two of them for Olivia’s sake. She believes they hooked up more than once. In Olivia’s interview, she says, the more she thinks about it, the more angry she gets. It doesn’t make sense and she feels like an idiot. Leva says, if she were Olivia, she’d watch her back. Shep asks how Taylor’s day was, and she says she’s tired. He says, this too shall pass, and tells her to get ahead of the article. Say she f***ed up, she loves and respects Olivia, and would love to get back to a place where they can be friends. Taylor says, they had that conversation already, and Shep tells her, say it again.

Olivia goes inside, and tells JT that she chatted with Leva, and her advice was lean in on him. Leva told her that JT knows stuff she should know. JT says, at Day Chaser, Taylor said they had multiple sleepovers. We flash back to this revelation, and Taylor saying she even slept there when Austen and Olivia were dating. JT wonders if guy code and girl code are different, but Venita says, they’re the same. In Venita’s interview, she says, she thinks Olivia has a right to be upset. At this point everyone is tired and wants real answers and they’re not getting anywhere. Olivia says she appreciates JT opening up, and Shep says, it’s stunning and beautiful here. He thanks Craig for making it happen and wishes Paige were here. He hopes they can hang out with her more soon. Life is good. Life is beautiful. He hopes everyone is having a good time. Cheers to his friends. (In other words, how about them Mets?) Olivia says, it’s the Southern way; slap a smile on your face and say cheers. The food looks amazing, and  Shep says, maybe he and Taylor can hang tomorrow. Has she talked anybody? Friends or family? Taylor says, and her friends in Charleston reached out as well as a friend from New York. They said the way she’s being treated is wild. Shep is the only one who has her back. Shep says, they all do, but he knows her. Madison says she’s trying not to eavesdrop, but it’s kind of hard, and Craig asks if Olivia has tried talking to Taylor and squashing it. Olivia says, after the article, she hasn’t heard a single word from Taylor, and Craig says, he thinks Austen feels bad, but he’s the one who said they did nothing wrong. He asks why Austen hasn’t apologized, and Austen says he hasn’t had a chance to talk to her. Olivia says, he literally doesn’t know how to do that, and Austen says he’s exhausted over the never-ending carousel. Olivia asks if he’s tired of talking about what he caused. Don’t do dumb sh*t if he doesn’t want to be talked about. Austen says, Olivia is up and down. One day she hates him, and another day she doesn’t. She says she doesn’t have the truth or consistency about anything, so forgive her if her emotions are up and down. Austen says he’s being honest about it; it didn’t happen. Rod asks if they’re on the same planet, and Austen asks why Rod is bothering him. Rod says he’s watching Austen toy with Olivia’s emotions, but Austen says he’s not trying to do that. JT jumps up and says, how about a real apology? Austen has to f***ing end this. He’s an insecure boy in a man suit. Stand up and be a f***ing man. Just say he’s sorry. Austen tells him to shut up, and JT says he can’t watch this bullsh*t anymore. Wow. In the middle of a restaurant. In Jamaica.

In Austen’s interview, he says, none of this has anything to do with him. He’s going to therapy and trying to change and fix things. JT inserted himself in Austen’s relationship and it only got worse. It’s so bizarre. He tells Olivia that he’s sorry, and she calls him a lying POS. She says she’s not surprised by his part in it, but nobody is. He doesn’t acknowledge that he’s done anything wrong. Stop saying bullsh*t he doesn’t mean, like the other day when he said he still loved her. We flash back to that, and she says, he’s walking bullsh*t. JT tells her, well said, and in Craig’s interview, he says, in the past, Austen would get mad and spin out of control. Now he’s like, if it makes you feel better, yell at him. He’s going to let them yell and continue to control what he can. He’s learning. Craig asks if Taylor is good, and Madison says she heard Olivia say that Taylor matters, but Austen doesn’t. Shep says, they had that conversation, but Taylor didn’t listen. Taylor says, she can’t today, physically or emotionally, and in her interview, she says she feels like everybody is picking Olivia’s side. No one wants to hear her out except Shep. Shep gets up and says, they’re going back to the hotel; it’s not a short drive. Craig tells him, sit down. Your girlfriend is crying and we’re trying to fix sh*t. Shep says, it’s not we. Craig gets off scot-free because his girlfriend lives in New York. His relationship isn’t under a microscope. In Shep’s interview, he says, they give Austen a hard time because he doesn’t confide in them, but he doesn’t think Craig confides in them either. There’s no friction in his life that they know about. Craig says, Shep just ruined everything, and tells Shep to get in the bus. Shep tells him to make up his mind. Craig just told him to stay. Craig says, it’s better if Shep’s not here, and Shep says, Craig isn’t going to like what he has to say. It’s long distance. It’s a relationship. Craig says, Shep is drunk and an awful boyfriend, and Shep says, Craig gets off scot-free. Craig says, maybe that’s because he doesn’t cheat on his girlfriend. Shep goes there and says, maybe it’s the other way around. Let’s talk about that. Craig asks if Shep is f***ing nuts.

To be continued…

🍸 Shaking Not Stirring…

About that Bond connection and more.

https://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/southern-charm-patricia-altschul-things-you-didnt-know

✡️ Hanukkah Sameach…

These are so cool. Be sure to check out the one made of shells.

https://www.travelchannel.com/interests/holidays/photos/hanukkah-around-the-world?ic1=triv_120723

🔫 No Red Ryder For You…

Come on by tomorrow for everything from soap to online nuts. Until then, stay safe, stay always having a backup plan in case things go sideways, and stay not wasting a second looking back at something that can’t be changed. Live the life you have now.