What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Carly and Sonny explain things to Michael about how Morgan has to be committed, but they don’t use that word. They’re at the MetroCourt (of course) and Jason comes by. He tells Carly he’s leaving.

Anna and Paul meet at the bar. She asks if he has an update on Carrrlos. He says she’ll be the first to know when he does.

Dr. Mays says Tracy is late for the biopsy prep. Monica says she’ll try to reach her. Meanwhile, Tracy is in the crypt, communing with her family. Don’t start me crying, Tracy. She talks to them and it’s actually a bit funny. She tells them she’s not ready to join them.

Paul says he hasn’t heard from Carrrlos yet, even though we know he did. Anna gripes about the immunity agreement he wants to give Carrrlos. Paul says he cares about Anna and she says call her when he hears from Carrrlos.

Griffin runs into Felix at the bar. Felix tells him how much the nurses appreciate him because he actually knows their names and makes eye contact. He bitches about Dr. Mays and Griffin agrees. Felix says he’s got a reputation for annoying the new people and if Griffin needs anything, he should go to Monica.

Tracy says all she has as a formidable opponent now is Monica and it’s not the same. Stop it, Tracy, I’m tearing up. She keeps leaving Lila out of all her complaints very pointedly, making her monologue a little less sad. She says she wishes Lila were there to hold her hand and she’s scared. She says she can feel the lesions growing in her brain and ticking her life away. She hears the door open and asks if its Alan, but it’s Dillon. Yeah, as much as I loved Alan, that ghost storyline never worked for me.

Jason says he’s leaving for his own place, not leaving Port Charles. He tells Sonny that Sam caught him up on Morgan. Michael says they’re all a real fun bunch and leaves for wherever. Carly asks Jason about his new place, but Sonny says he has to leave. Jason says he must have surprised the hell out of Dixon by getting out of the wheelchair. Sonny says he wishes Jason had been there.

Jason tells Carly that Sam said the same thing about wishing he was at the church. He says he would never let any of his loved ones be in danger, but he’s not going to work for Sonny again. Carly says good, because she doesn’t want him to.

Anna gets a fax of Carrrlos and Sabrrrina’s picture. The doorbell rings. It’s Sonny.

Griffin tells Monica he’s been doing some research and has a theory about what’s going on with Tracy. Monica says he must not agree with Dr. Mays, but Griffin says the doctor has made it clear he’s not letting Griffin in on anything and he needs the biopsy results to be sure. Monica says she has the final say, but Tracy hasn’t shown up for the tests.

Dillon asks what Tracy is doing there and she says it’s peaceful. He asks what name she called him and she blows off the question. He tries to get her to come back to the house and have Alice make tea. She gets confused as to who Alice is and has another seizure.

Carly says she doesn’t want Jason working for Sonny and Jason says since when. She says if that was his decision she’s honor it, but she’s sick of the violence being acceptable. He asks what that means for her and Sonny.

Anna asks Sonny how Morgan is. Sonny says he’s getting the help he needs. He wants to thank her for going to his house to warn him about the pier. She says she appreciates everything he did to bring Dixon down. He asks why she thought he would listen to her. Anna says they’ve had their differences, but they also have mutual respect and Robin would have wanted her to be honest. He asks for a glass of water and snoops around, seeing the Carrrlos picture. When Anna comes back, he asks her if Carrrlos is alive.

Carrrlos calls Paul again. Paul asks where Carrrlos is, and Carrrlos says wouldn’t Paul like to know. Paul tells Carrrlos that he’s no longer safe and the only way out is to come home.

Tracy is wheeled into the hospital. Dillon explains what happened and says he already called Dr. Mays when they were on the road. Griffin tells Dillon he did the right thing. Dillon tells him about the anti-depressant story Tracy told him. Griffin tells him the biopsy was scheduled, but Tracy didn’t show. Dr. Mays enters. He says he knows the word cancer is frightening and Dillon freaks a little.

Dillon asks Dr. Mays if he thinks Tracy has brain cancer. Griffin asks to speak with the doctor in private and Dr. Mays tells Dillon they’ll talk later. Griffin says without a biopsy, the doctor can’t assume Tracy has cancer. Dr. Mays says the MRI points to tha, and rattles off his million credentials. Griffin says maybe the doctor’s years of experience have clouded his reading skills, because it appears Tracy doesn’t have cancer at all.

Monica tells Tracy she’s not leaving until they get some answers, Tracy asks if she’s going to die. Monica says not today.

Anna comes clean with Sonny about Carrrlos. He asks about the corpse and she says she’s not at liberty to discuss that. He asks about Sabrrrina and if she was kidnaped. Anna says she believes she’s there of her own free will.

Carly says she feels like the world’s biggest hypocrite. Jason says things change and Sonny should accept that. Carly says Sonny did listen to her an agree to consider alternatives.

Sonny says he’s going to hunt down Carrrlos and kill him. No! Not my Carrrlos! And hey, that’s no alternative to violence.

Jason says Sonny should realize that not every argument needs to be settled with a gun. Carly says there are worse people than Sonny who would like to take what he has. Jason asks how she ended up having a son with his brother. She says she went looking for Jason, found AJ and accidentally slept with him. How’d that happen? She talks about how the Quartermaines tried to take Michael away, but Jason helped her to keep him. He asks if his family was that bad and she reminisces about Lila and how wonderful she was and how Jason’s last name came from her. She says there’s still a plaque in the crypt with his name on it.

Griffin says there are other possibilities. Dr. Mays gets stupid about Griffin looking at the MRI and goes on about his experience. Dillon tries to ask a question and Dr. Mays tells him to get out and don’t come back.

Felix tells Michael about a note from Sabrrrina where she said she’s happy and not coming back. Michael says if anyone can raise a baby alone, Sabrrrina can. Felix tells Michael that Sabrrrina really loved him. I dunno about that though.

Carrrlos says he sees no reason to come back. Paul says life on the run with a baby can’t be good. Carrrlos asks why, after spending all the money and time, Paul wants him back. Paul says for now, Carrrlos just needs to play his part.

Sonny says Anna wanted him to see the picture. She says he has resources and any help he can give would be appreciated. She says Julian is the one they need and if it all goes according to plan, they can nail Julian. Sonny says Duke deserves justice. Anna says the only way they can do that is to get Julian. She doesn’t care if he’s squeaky clean now. He’s still the one responsible. Anna asks Sonny to keep her informed and shell do the same for him. Sonny says, done.

Carly and Jason go to the crypt. He says you don’t see your own name on a grave every day. Carly tells him about the family, and how Edward had big plans for him and how much Lila loved him. She says Emily was kind and generous, but nobody’s fool, and she always tried to run interference to make everyone get along. She tells him Alan had difficulty accepting he wasn’t the son he once knew, but in the end made peace with it. She pretty much blows past AJ, not wanting to dredge that up.

Carly tells Jason just because he’s not going to work for Sonny doesn’t mean he has to go back to the Quartermaines.

Carrrlos says Paul is asking to get him killed. He asks what about Anna? Paul says he’ll get immunity if he testifies against Julian, but he’s never to mention any crimes committed by Paul or Anna. Carrrlos says it’s not his job to make Paul’s life easy. Paul says Carrrlos’s job is his family. Carrrlos says he’s never coming back and to wire his payment to the offshore account. He wants no new deal with Paul.

Sonny sits with Michael and Michael says Felix showed him a picture of s baby. He says if he’d been more understanding she’d be there with him, instead of in Puerto Rico raising a baby by herself. Sonny says it’s not right and he has something to tell Michael.
Jason is trying to pry the plaque with his name off the crypt. He finally has success and says it’s official, he’s alive. Carly says she’s got to go, but she’s a little creeped out, so she’s not going out by herself. Jason says he’ll walk her to the car. He says the crypt is a good place to back and think.

In the hospital, Dillon asks if he should call Ned and Tracy says she doesn’t need more family members around telling her life is beautiful. She asks for a couple of minutes alone before Dr. Mays starts digging in her brain. Dillon tells her he loves her. Tracy says Monica told her it’s a minor procedure, but she loves him too.

Dillon tells Monica that Griffin said it might not be cancer and he’d like to talk to him.

Griffin is at Anna’s. He tells her he’s been following her.

Tomorrow, Dillon talks to Griffin, the chapter is closed on Helena, and Sam approaches Hayden.

Little Women: Atlanta

Morlen (again, these names, he sounds like a wizard) is taking Monie out to cheer her up. Because life is so stressful when you basically do nothing. They make their own bouquet at a flower shop and she tells him about he music video debacle. She says she thought she was doing a good thing, but it didn’t work out that way. Morlen suggests she step things up around the house and maybe cook dinner once in a while.

Since Emily is pregnant, she’s been working more behind the club scenes, and getting bookings for Bri. She’s gotten a call from a club who wants Bri and the Tiny Twins. Bri flashes back to the disaster that their last booking together was. They need the bucks, so Emily suggests they invite everyone and make a vacation out of it.

They twins visit Monie to help her with her cooking skills. They discuss the video while making a meal. Emily calls about the gig while the twins are there. She tells them her idea of the girls all staying at a beach house. Monie says she needs a vacation. From what?

Everyone packs for the trip. Minnie drives with the Cheeks and Monie drives with the twins. Emily pats herself on the back for getting the twins a job.

The gig is in Savannah which looks beautiful. Their rental is by the water and close to town. It’s pretty freakin’ nice too. Trying to get all the suitcases up the stairs is quite a project though. Minnie says the struggle is real when you have to carry around suitcases as big as you. Truth!

Monie wants to clear the air about the video. She apologizes for the rudeness of the director. Emily says they were just being used. Monie says little people are often taken advantage of and she’s over it. Minnie says it was unprofessional and a waste of time. Monie says Minnie went a bit overboard, which makes Minnie go a bit overboard.

Minnie says she was defending all of them and the director deserved her wrath. Emily brings up Monie defending Minnie at the party and also being extreme. Minnie says she thought they were over the Juicy situation. (Ha-ha-ha! Can you believe I just typed that?) She and Monie exchange words and somehow Monie brings up Troy.

Emily is like, no matter what they do together, there’s always an altercation. Minnie says Monie claimed to accept her apology, but she keeps bringing it up again. They agree to try and have a nice vacation.

The Cheeks are having breakfast with Minnie, who says Monie is dwelling on the past. She thinks Monie is taking out the video fail on her. In her individual interview. Monie says it’s hard to get past the lies. Please, she lied about having a boyfriend. Big deal. The twins think it’s ridiculous and feel stuck in the middle.

The Cheeks go shopping with Minnie and bring up how awkward it is at the house. Minnie’s feelings are hurt because the twins seem to be hanging out with Monie now.

The girls meet and ride to the club in some kind of pedal bus. It’s very cool and has a bar. I love the pedicabs in NYC, but they don’t serve drinks.

The girls have a private room to get ready at the club. Minnie decides to talk to Amanda. Amanda says nothing has changed, but Minnie says she feels things are different. She has difficulty explaining herself and starts to cry. She says she feels awkward around them and that’s why she’s been distancing herself. Amanda thinks Minnie should talk to Monie. Minnie says she will.

Emily says bringing in the twins is a risk to her reputation. If they act the fool, no one will want to book the Cheeks again. It looks like a half lodge, half tiki bar. The twins start dancing on stage with Bri, and all the girls work the club. Some women starts dancing with them and acting stupid. Emily says they’re used to anything and everything and people act crazy, but it’s part of the job. Monie says this is more a waste of time than the video and leaves. The rest pat themselves on the back for getting along.

In the morning, Emily tells Bri that Monie is packed and ready to go, and the rest aren’t even up yet. She says everyone else had a good time, and Monie wasn’t even supportive the night before. Emily says she’s tired of Monie’s drama.

Everyone is ready to go. The twins are pissed about Monie flaking the night before. They question her about it and she says she was tired. She says she has to drive and she needed her rest. She says she’s not mad at the twins, but Minnie is another story. The twins repeat what Minnie said and say they should talk. Monie says she tried, but she’s not going to kiss anyone’s ass. The twins say they’re getting along with the Cheeks, so why not Monie and Minnie? Minnie wants to deal with it now and asks Monie to step outside. She tells Monie she can feel the tension and wants to know what’s wrong, because it seems like Monie has changed. They start talking about the twins, but Monie talks over Minnie. Monie brings up how she defended Minnie to Juicy. Minnie says she appreciated it, but Monie took it to another level.

Monie says Minnie hasn’t been keeping it real and Minnie says Monie has been a stuck up bitch. Monie disagrees and says if that’s how Minnie feels, deal with it. She doesn’t think she can trust Minnie again. Minnie says she apologized and told the truth, so what’s the problem now? They talk a bunch of nonsense. Minnie says talking to Monie is like talking to a tree and Monie says ain’t nobody got time for that. She stomps off.

Magically, Minnie is back in her room. The Cheeks ask what’s going on and Minnie tells them about the Monie conversation and how she keeps bringing up the past. She says it’s hurtful because Monie was her girl and they can’t get things back on track. She says if she can’t be Mama Bear, she doesn’t know her place in the group. The Cheeks say that what stinks is Monie is spreading the negativity to everyone.

Monie and the twins leave, with Monie grumbling behind the wheel.

Next week, Morlen talks babies, Emily finds out if it’s a boy or a girl, and Minnie gets a DNA test done to see who her father is.

Little Women: LA

Elena is getting a sonogram. The doctor gives her and Preston the news that they’re having twins. The doctor says it will be high risk and she’ll be going to a specialist after the first trimester. He says she’ll most likely have a C-section, she only has to carry until the babies can be born healthy. They’re fraternal twins, so not only could they be a boy and a girl, they could be one little person and one average sized baby.

Christy doesn’t want to be rejected by an adoption agency because of Todd’s weight. Since she can’t force him to get gastric bypass surgery, she’s trying to set an exercise example. The new house looks pretty good and Christy wants to have a house-warming party.

Tonya is having vision problems and she’s having a doctor check her out. Her daughter comes along to the appointment, and Tonya brings up getting back together with her father. Angelique is skeptical that things will work out. The doctor says ten years ago, Tonya’s right eye was turning inward and wants to check that. He sees it’s still happening and wants her to get surgery. The next step is seeing a specialist. He wants to make sure she’ll follow through, as he’d suggested it before, and he makes her pinky swear. I’m not kidding. He really did.

Jasmine and Briana are getting pedicures. Briana tells Jasmine that she and Matt want to have a “real” wedding. Jasmine asks if she’s going to invite all of he girls and Briana says no. Terra and Tonya have never been supportive, and she wasn’t invited to Terra’s wedding. She’s unsure about Christy. Jasmine suggests a bachelorette party in Mexico. She has an ulterior motive of reconnecting the ladies. She tells Briana she might see that relationships have changed under the Mexican sun after a few Margaritas.

Elena and Christy are meeting their mutual friend, Ali, for lunch. They knew each other back in the day when working in a club. Ali recently had surgery, is feeling great, and she’s working in one of my favorite places, the Venice Beach Freak Show. A&E did a reality show about them and I loved it. But then, like when you find a style of shoe that fits perfectly, they stopped making it.

Christy invites Ali and her husband Matt to the house-warming. Elena tells her not to be intimidated by the group, and Christy says watch out for Tonya.

Terra says she and Tonya have known each other forever, and have never fought like they did at Jasmine’s party. Terra is proceeding with caution, but wants to move forward. She hopes that they never have a repeat performance. They meet for a drink and Tonya tells her about the upcoming eye surgery. Terra says she’ll be there, the inference being even though Tonya wasn’t there for Penny’s surgery. Tonya says Terra likes to throw shade, but she learned from the best. They talk about the upcoming party.

Elena and Preston have invited Preston’s dad over to share the good news. Preston does a little presentation with a remote-controlled truck to annouce the pending birth. Elena tells him he’s getting two grandkids for the price of one. Elena is both excited and nervous about possible complications.

Matt and Briana are having a date night. She tells him about Jasmine throwing her a bachelorette party in Mexico. He says it’s the first time he’s seen anyone in the group go out of their way for her. Briana tells him Jasmine’s idea of her trying to reconnect. Matt says every time all the girls get together, there seem to be problems. Briana thinks with Jasmine in charge, they’ll have a great time.

Christy visits Jasmine. Jasmine wants to get Christy involved with the bachelorette party. Christy invites her to the house-warming. Jasmine tells Christy about the Mexico trip. Christy feels hurt because she’d hoped to do those things for Briana. Jasmine says she’s never sure where Christy stands with Briana. She says she gets how they’re both hurt, but they need to forget the past and move forward. Jasmine tells her if they keep pushing at Briana, she’ll cut them off, and Briana needs a friend right now.

Terra wants another baby and she and Joe have been looking at larger homes. They’re meeting with their real estate agent to see if they’re approved for a loan. The agent says there are some red flags on the application. Terra’s credit isn’t great and it’s keeping them from getting the loan. She says the worst case scenario is they’ll have to wait another year. Terra is concerned that Joe will use putting off a new home as an excuse for putting off having more kids.

It’s house-warming time! And time for cocktails! Christy has created a beautiful atmosphere. Everyone is out in the backyard where there are lots of candles. Terra talks to Jasmine, who tells her about the Mexico trip. She says if they want to rebuild a friendship, it’s a good start and Briana is good with everyone being invited. Terra has doubts, but Jasmine asks her to give it a try.

Elena doesn’t think tonight is a good night to give her news about the twins because it’s Christy and Todd’s party. Christy tells Terra that Ali and her husband are coming, and Terra isn’t exactly receptive. She says in the little people community, instead of six dgrees of separation, it’s more like two. She thinks it’s risky inviting a new person without letting everyone know.

Briana and Matt show up. Jasmine tells them she’s going to announce the bachelorette party tonight. Tonya comes and Terra pours wine down her throat to help ease Ali joining the party, since she hates surprises and new people. Tonya doesn’t seem to remember Ali from anywhere though. Ali introduces her husband, who comes off like a drunken jerk right away.

Jasmine invites everyone to Mexico. In her individual interview, Elena says she has no desire to be throwing up from morning sickness alongside the others throwing up from too much tequila. Terra, in shit-stirrer mode, asks Briana if it was her idea to invite everyone. Briana says Jasmine made a good argument for it and whoever wants to come, should come. Pushing further, Terra asks if Briana’s family will be there.

Briana says right now it’s not on the table, but it doesn’t mean it’s not going to happen. Terra and Tonya jet to the kitchen for dessert. They act like it’s an outrage that Ali was invited without their prior knowledge. Terra asks if Jasmine hadn’t put the bachelorette party together, if Tonya thinks Briana would have invited them. Tonya says no, and she doesn’t want to be supportive, but she doesn’t want to discuss it here. Terra wonders if Jasmine is twisting Briana’s arm.

Ali and Briana get to know each other. Briana is glad to meet someone new who isn’t all up in her business.

Christy comes in the kitchen, and Terra and Tonya say they would find it weird to go to the bachelorette party. Christy says she’s all for forgive and forget. Terra says they don’t feel supportive, and does Christy really want to go? Christy says if she wants to salvage her relationship with Briana, she’d better go, and they’re going to go with her. Christy says what if no one goes, and Terra says that’s not too far-fetched.

Still to come, Tonya questions Briana’s happiness, the Mexico trip and the wedding go forward.

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Dante keeps leaving messages for Lulu, telling her he’s on The Haunted Star. Lulu keeps rising to the top of the water and trying to get his attention.

Morgan is handcuffed to a chair, basically going bananas. Michael keeps trying to explain what the problem is, and you’d think people would get it, especially in 2016. Jordan says she wants Michael restrained and in a holding cell, but Andre steps in, saying Morgan is his patient.

The paramedics finally arrive at the pier. Carly wipes her bloody hands on her really nice sweater and I say, why, Carly, why? Anna tells Paul the whole thing was a disaster and their main guy got away, like he doesn’t know this already. And like it’s his fault Morgan interfered.

Dixon says the cripple wants to be a hero. Does anyone really talk like that? He doesn’t trust Sonny and he says he should shoot Sonny, since it’s his son’s fault that this happened. He points the gun at Sonny, and Alexis says he doesn’t want to shoot a man in a wheelchair in front of his daughter. Yes, let’s reason with a man who sounds like he came from a 50s gangster movie.

Kiki is taken to the hospital. Paul asks Carly how Morgan ended up there. She says she doesn’t know and he says she should, because he just messed up a major operation. Anna asks Carly for any information and Carly tells her about the phone message. Paul says Dixon was gong to shoot Morgan and Kiki tried to push him out of the way.

Andre asks Jordan if Morgan seems rational. He says Morgan needs medication and sedation. and that Morgan needs to come with him now.

Dixon wants to know who Sonny’s other kid is. Sonny reminds him of the 2 million. Dixon says the bride broke the rules and aims his gun at Alexis. Julian offers him 5 million to go away. Dixon bidding wars! Dixon says he’ll make an exception for the bride since he’s sentimental that way. Maxie asks if she can have help and Lucas offers to take her place. Dixon says no. Nina tries to help and Dixon says Maxie better know what she’s doing because no one else is getting up.

Nicholas offers his resources, including a private helicopter. Dixon asks who he is. Nicholas tells him that he’s Prince Cassadine. Dixon wants to know how he knows the happy couple. Nicholas says Alexis is his aunt. Dixon wants information as to who the bridesmaids are and who is Sonny’s daughter. I’m not even sure, so good luck with that.

Dante finally gets a clue and jumps in the water. He eventually sees Lulu face down. He brings her to the surface.

Paul wants to know if Morgan found out about the gun shipment from Sonny. Carly says Sonny doesn’t want Morgan in the business. Carly wants to go to Kiki. Paul tries to stop her, but Anna says to let her go. Anna tells Paul that the mere fact that a bystander was shot is unacceptable. Paul tells her that Morgan showed up armed maybe wanted to hijack the shipment. He says this might help them to take Sonny down. Anna says they need to concentrate on Dixon and wonders where he might be. Paul says Ava was his only contact.

Andre says Morgan is a suicide risk and does Jordan want a lawsuit. This ruffles Jordan’s feathers and she starts barking orders at everyone. Andre says he’s just looking out for his patient who’s in a manic episode, and he’s not trying to trump her authority. Jordan allows him to take Morgan. Michael tells Morgan he can see Kiki if he cooperates with the doctors. Jordan says don’t make her regret her decision.

The desk sergeant tells Jordan that someone just heard shooting from the chapel.

Dixon says he only needs one hostage, so which one is Sonny’s daughter? Sam says she is and Dixon says he can see from Sonny’s face, she’s not. Sonny says if he hurts any of the girls, he’s dead. Dixon asks if Sonny is going to kill him with harsh language. He says Sonny is helpless and just stalling and is starting to annoy him. Why it doesn’t occur to him that Sonny might have a gun or light saber or something, I don’t know. It’s not exactly like he checked for that.

Dixon asks Ava if she has anything to contribute. She advises him to take Sonny and Julia’s offers. He says fine, he’ll tell them where to send the money as soon as he gets where he’s going with Sonny’s daughter. Ava offers herself as a hostage.

Dante gets Lulu to land and performs CPR. He tells her he loves her and he and Rocco need her.

Andre gets Morgan to the hospital. Morgan says he doesn’t need to be admitted. Andre says if he can’t manage that, he’s going to have to be restrained. Morgan sits with Michael on a bench. Amazingly, they’ve gotten there before Kiki did. She’s wheeled in and Morgan gets crazy again.

Dixon says taking Ava does nothing to hurt Sonny. She says the girls will just make him a bigger target. He shoots the gun in the air and tells her to take her seat. He takes Molly and the girls all go nuts. Kristina says it’s her and Dixon grabs her. He says he’ll tell them where to send the money. Everything gets a little confused, with people yelling and moving around, and I’m sure Dixon is going to shoot someone, when Sonny jumps up from his chair. He grabs Dixon from behind, throws him to the floor and takes his gun. Go, Sonny!

Everyone scrambles to Nathan. Sonny tells Dixon to get on his knees. He says he’s going to make him pay for threatening his daughter. Carly walks in startled that Sonny is up. Paul and Anna enter. Sonny tells them they’re a little late.

Lulu comes to, choking up water.

Brad tells Lucas that one thing he can say about Lucas’s family is they’re never boring. Anna goes to talk to Sonny and Paul says he has some things to wrap up. Olivia tells Ava she did a brave thing. Paul tells everyone to stay put until they can get statements.

Morgan says he wants to fix things. Andre tells him he needs to fix himself first and Morgan needs to trust him.

Anna tells Sonny not to go anywhere. Carly asks Sonny how long he’s been lying to her about being able to walk. She doesn’t wait for an answer and walks away from him. Carly tells Ava about what happened with Kiki. Ava asks if she’s alive and she sees the blood on Carly’s really nice sweater. Ava starts to leave and Paul tries to stop her. She slaps him one, but for some reason the sound is out of sync with the action, so it comes off looking pretty funny. Ava tells Paul it’s his fault Kiki got shot and storms out.

Carly asks Anna if she can go. Anna says yes, and thanks her for her help with Kiki. Alexis says this shouldn’t have happened and she doesn’t even want to know how Ava is involved. Olivia tells Julian that she’s glad she didn’t bring Leo and this is obviously what her premonition was about. Alexis thanks Sonny for saving Kristina’s life. This is one of those times I actually like Sonny. Alexis asks him what he knows. He says he had nothing to do with it, but I don’t think she believes him.

Nathan arrives at the hospital next. He wakes up babbling about Dixon and Maxie tells him Dixon is in custody. Nathan is wheeled into surgery. Nina tells Franco he’s her hero. He says he’s selfish and a coward and to never think any different. Ava comes in hysterical, looking for Kiki.

Lulu gets brought in next. Dante tells the doctor what happened and they check Lulu for hypothermia.

Morgan wants Michael to check on Kiki. Ava comes in and starts screaming at Morgan. about how it’s his fault. Franco tells her she’s not doing anybody any good and she won’t be able to see Kiki if she doesn’t calm down. Morgan says he’d never hurt Kiki.

Anna thanks Sonny for his help. He says to thank him by bringing the culprits to justice. Everyone is allowed to go home. Jordan says Paul has a habit of not telling her things. Paul admits to Anna that things went awry, but Dixon is in custody and he and Anna make a great team. She calls him an arrogant s.o.b.

Carly goes back to the pier wondering what happened. I’m surprised she’s allowed to wander around there since its a crime scene for a crime that happened five minutes ago. She takes down the police tape and starts throwing the guns in the water. Sonny comes up and asks what she’s doing. She asks why he lied to her.

Anna says is was ill planned and that one person like Morgan should not have been able to cause such chaos. Paul says it was still a success. Anna tells him take all the credit, because she doesn’t want to associate with him anymore.

Alexis tells Julian she knows it wasn’t his fault and that the wedding might have been a disaster, but their kids are all safe and they made it through the vows.

Dante is holding the unconscious Lulu’s hand when she wakes up. She asks how he knew where she was and he says he just knew. This almost brings a tear to my eye.

Ava is in with Kiki. She says nothing was supposed to happen to her. Morgan and Michael stand in the doorway. Michael says Morgan has to go now. Morgan says if she dies it’s his fault.

Carly tells Sonny thanks a lot for letting her grieve while watching him pretend to struggle. Sonny says Morgan has to hit rock bottom before he’d get help. Carly says, well he sure did, and tells him about Morgan stealing his gun and Kiki getting shot. Hmm…Carly seems to be going into a riff on gun control. Sonny tells her that the crates don’t have his name on them, but Jerome Gallery. He says it was necessary and he’d do it again. He says Morgan wasn’t supposed to be a part of it. Carly says the violence was always waiting for him and they made it happen.

Tomorrow, Dante loves Lulu more than ever, Elizabeth apologizes for the millionth time, and Kiki might be paralyzed. In Port Charles, probably not for long.

Side note: When I tuned into Judge Judy early, Dr Phil was still on and had this to say: “My daddy always told me not to miss a damn good chance to shut up.”

Little Women: Atlanta

Disregarding Dr. Phil’s daddy’s wise advice and giving my two cents. If you don’t want to be stereotyped and labeled by things like “midget wrestling,” ladies, please stop getting into fist-fights with one another.

Minnie is still getting over what went down at her birthday party. She’s meeting the Cheeks and Wooda at his studio to go over it again. Minnie says she has to talk to Monie about her getting out of control. They think just because Minnie mended fences with Juicy, Monie thinks she’s being replaced as a friend.

The twins are learning to drive. The instructor has to set up pedal extensions first. Whatever twin isn’t driving, is in the backseat laughing with her boyfriend. When it’s her turn though, she doesn’t do much better. The instructor suggests using two feet. I’m not laughing because I’m not so sure how I’d do in their place.

Minnie comes by Juicy’s house to see if her apology was genuine. Minnie doesn’t want what Monie did to come between them either. She outright asks if Juicy’s apology was sincere. Juicy says she wants to move on and it was from the heart. She says she didn’t come to the party to cause drama. Minnie says she’s missed them hanging out.

Minnie brings up Monie throwing the drink on Juicy. Juicy says Monie is a character and wonders how she and Minnie can be friends. Juicy thinks Monie probably doesn’t have many friends and she’s jealous.

Monie has started her voice-over training. She tells boyfriend Morlen about what happened at the party. He says she needs to watch her temper. Monie says she has an allergy to bs. Why that means she has to get physical, I don’t know. Morlen says the girls should talk things out and come together. Monie wants things the way they used to be.

The twins go bike shopping, since it will be a while before they get their licenses. I’m just short and have a hard time finding a comfortable bike, I can’t imagine what they go through. They have to ride a kid’s bike. I feel their pain.

Andrea is real unhappy with her leech boyfriend. Amanda says if he was going to change, he’d have done it by now. Andrea doesn’t want to let the boyfriend go and thinks they can work things out. Her sister says this is no example for her son.

The Cheeks are having a photo shoot. They talk about the twins getting a job at the club they promote. Emily is worried that she’s starting to show and it might be obvious in the pictures. Yeah, a little bit.

Andrea and boyfriend Chris go out for dinner. No doubt she’s paying. Andrea tries to talk to Chris. She wants him to get a job, and he takes offense to this. She says he wasn’t around when their son had a hospital emergency. He has chronic lung disease and is also a little person. Andrea says the arguing isn’t healthy and Chris says he’ll try his best.

The girls go apple picking. The Cheeks wonder if Minnie forgave Juicy so Juicy wouldn’t continue to gossip about her. Minnie hopes there won’t be any alcohol involved. I don’t think that goes real well with apple picking either.

Minnie talks about how average sized people often disrespect little people, doing things like taking pictures without asking and patting them on the head. Minnie says she’s been torn, a part of her want’s to just move on, but a part of her wants to know what made Monie so angry.

There’s silence between Minnie and Monie, making the start a little awkward. Monie thanks them for coming and yada yada yada. They take a hay wagon to the orchard. I’m not sure why this is suddenly a thing with the Little Women, since it looks like a struggle for a little person to apple pick.

Monie asks Minnie why she got angry when she had Minnie’s back? Minnie says she was being chill and Monie got out of control and had no business throwing a drink on Juicy. Right away, Monie gets angry again, saying that Juicy had it coming. They start getting loud. Monie throws shade at Juicy and Minnie says she’s talking about Monie right now. Monie asks what’s really up with Minnie and Troy, and is there any truth in what Juicy had been saying.

Minnie says she was there to have fun, not for a confrontation. Monie thinks Minnie forgave Juicy too fast. Minnie says she lied and Troy really wasn’t her boyfriend. Monie is all shocked and says Minnie has been making Juicy out to be the bad guy. Does this mean she’ll apologize for that drink throwing?

Minnie says she felt badly being the only single one of the group. She was afraid that they would look at her funny. Monie says they would never do that and Minnie should be honest. Minnie tells the rest of the girls. She asks for no judgment and for them to put themselves in her shoes. Everyone is supportive, but Monie still feels betrayed and wonders what else Minnie might be lying about.

Commercial break. The Mother/Daughter Experiment: Celebrity Edition looks like pure has-been hell. I’ll probably watch it. It also sounds like a board game.

Minnie tells her mother that she lied about Troy. She says the reason her mom hasn’t met Troy is because they’re not in a relationship. She says her friends all have boyfriends. Her mother says that’s no excuse for lying. She brings up what happened with Monie. She says what if it had been worse just because Minnie lied? Minnie apologizes and her mother accepts that, but she tells Minnie to put her big girl panties on.

The twins are out on a bike ride. They talk about what a drag it is riding a kid’s bike, but at least they’re getting around. Then they throw shade at the Cheeks, since they’re first night at the club is tonight.

The Cheeks have a booking at Boogalou, the same club the twins are signed up for. Emily says she has to get some bookings in before she really starts to show.

The twins arrive at the club. Emily and Bri are already there, and Emily is like, not too awkward. She didn’t think they’d be working the same night. This looks like a pretty boring club. Not too many people. Fewer than an eighth grade dance. The twins wait tables while the Cheeks hang out on the swings near the bar. Emily says she didn’t know the club had the twins doing dirty work and generally insults them.

Down on the dance floor, Bri says she doesn’t serve people, she’s an entertainer. One of the twins gets in Emily’s face. Another get’s in Bri’s and they start to hair pull and fight. The people in the club look amused and probably think this is part of the act. Security pulls them apart.

A lone hair extension is left on the dance floor.

Next week, The fight is discussed, Bri wantts to go to counseling with Wooda who thinks she should go on her own, and a music video is filmed.

Important information: The new season of Southern Charm starts April 4.

Little Women: LA

We start with a rip-roaring fight between Terra and Tonya. Then it says five days earlier.

Jasmine knows her husband isn’t happy working at her father’s restaurant. Chris tells her his lack of experience in the restaurant business is frustrating because he doesn’t always get what’s being asked of him. He says he doesn’t want to go out of state for work though, so he’s going to stick with it.

Jasmine wants to host a party for the girls and their dates at the restaurant. If he’s working that night, she wants Chris to join them after his shift. He says it will be awkward, but he’ll roll with it. He seems like a pretty easy-going guy.

Terra and Tonya get together for drinks. They toast to Tonya’s love life. Tonya tells Terra about Kerwin’s visit. In her individual interview, Terra says Penny had decompression surgery recently, and two of her best friends weren’t around, one of them being Tonya. Being a good friend though, Terra listens patiently and asks the appropriate questions. She thinks Tonya will have to stop working with Ja.

Terra asks about Kerwin’s housemate. Terra says in all honesty, she doesn’t see Kerwin and Tonya living together. Tonya insists he’s changed, but Terra says he’s still living with another woman.

Briana and Matt are checking with a fertility specialist. Briana would like a baby with Matt, but it’s not happening and she wants to see if it can happen.

They meet with the doctor. Briana tells her about the pregnancy symptoms she thought she was having, only to find out she wasn’t even ovulating. The doctor wants to do an ultrasound. Briana says those are often painful for little people because a probe has to be used. The doctor points out something on the screen.

Briana has poly-cystic ovaries. Not good news, but Briana is glad it’s not something connected to her being a little person. The doctor says things look good for a future pregnancy.

Elena says the double date with Tonya didn’t go that well. She wants to talk to Tonya about Kerwin. She asks how they left things. Tonya says Kerwin is still mulling things over and Elena says she just doesn’t want to see Tonya get her heart broken.

Elena asks about the couples party. Tonya thinks Jasmine is being rude since she knows Tonya doesn’t have a date right now. Elena thinks she wants to cover up her mistake in not inviting Elena to her mom’s party. Elena says she wants to avoid Jasmine, but not her friends, so she’s going.

Christy and Todd are going to couples counseling. Christy says it hasn’t helped in past relationships, but she’s willing to give it a try with Todd. They tell the therapist about their background, including the frustration about trying to have a child. I’m loving Christy’s beachy wave hairstyle. Christy tells the therapist that she’s okay with Todd being overweight, but she’s afraid of being a window. She’s scared that they’ll adopt a child and he’s going to keel over dead.

She asks Todd not to be angry, and brings up the lap band surgery. He says he’s not a fan, but Christy says that he’s not doing anything else about it either. He makes a promise to do better. In her individual interview, Christy says she’s heard it all before (I know what that’s like), but now that they have a therapist, she feels like she has back up and there’s someone to hold Todd accountable. She says maybe Todd will surprise her and lose the weight this time. Todd says he knows he can do it.

Todd and Christy are looking at another house. It’s really cute, with a huge kitchen. The laundry room appliances are low, and they both love that. Todd says there’s no bigger challenge in life than retrieving that last sock. Christy tells Todd they have to get the house. Christy is feeling very positive and Todd thinks the therapy helped.

Tonya thinks the ladies had some valid points. She SKYPES with Kerwin and asks if he’s making any changes. He hasn’t said anything to the woman he lives with yet, and asks her if she understands the gravity of what she’s asking. Tonya is surprised because he’s always been the one pressuring her to be together. He’d afraid she’s going to change her mind again. She says she wants to work things out and he says he needs to make a decision. Their conversation wears me out.

Jasmine has the restaurant decorated with pinatas for the couples party. Penny is out of the hospital, and Terra says she and Joe need a date night. Chris has to work during the party. Jasmine thought it would be weird, but no one gives a flying. Tonya comes solo. Briana hopes the ladies don’t gang up on her again.

Elena says noting about this is romantic, so why is Jasmine calling it a date night? Tonya is sitting with her and Preston, and she’s miffed too. Tonya says Elena understands her better than Terra. She says she needs support right now, not discouragement.

There’s a taco truck included, and Briana and Christy go outside to check it out. They talk about the last time they clashed and how much both of them were hurt. Christy apologizes and says if Briana wants to apologize for the lies, that’s on her. Somehow this inches toward an argument, but Christy says she won’t feed into it. She apologizes again and says Briana never says “sorry” back. Weren’t we just here? Briana says she’s sorry for not telling Christy she was married and they get tacos. Thank goodness. I felt like I was headed for Groundhog Day.

They’re ready for the pinatas, which have candy and adult goodies in them. Jasmine encourages Elena to play, but she’s being standoffish. Christy takes out her frustrations on the pinata and Jasmine finishes the job. Jasmine asks why Elena doesn’t want to have fun. She asks if something is bothering Elena. Elena says she thought it was going to be a real couples party with candles and stuff, when they’re just hanging out. Jasmine says it was a way of inviting the guys. Jasmine says no matter what she does, she can’t please them. Tonya whines about being single.

Christy chimes in that Jasmine recognized her mistake in not inviting Elena to the last party. Everyone starts yelling at one another. Jasmine says they can either stay and enjoy themselves or they can leave.

Terra thinks Tonya is being ridiculous and that Jasmine doesn’t know every detail of everyone’s lives. Elena says something stupid and Jasmine says Elena hasn’t always been nice to her. Elena brings up the party she wasn’t invited to and Jasmine says she’s apologized a thousand times. Briana says she’d rather be at the bar doing shots with the guys, but at least this isn’t about her for once.

Terra and Tonya really get into it and I have the feeling this isn’t just about Elena and Jasmine anymore. Terra says when Penny was having spinal surgery, she really needed Tonya and she was too busy with Kerwin to bother. Terra asks where Tonya and Elena were when Penny was in the hospital, and tells Tonya not to say she’s always there for her. The three of them start yelling so loud, I can’t understand them. Elena storms out and Tonya says she’s out too.

Next week, either they didn’t give a preview or the world is going to end.

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts and recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Nicholas and Hayden return from Vegas. Spencer has left a welcome home card saying, told you so.

Nina is looking for Maxie, but she’s at the photo shoot. Olivia, Dillon and Maxie are looking over the proofs when Julian walks in.

Tracy is checking financials to see if there’s anything to add to ELQ’s portfolio. Michael says he thought the lawsuit will be further along by now.

Carly and Sonny talk about being a team. Max interrupts them to talk to Sonny. He says another arms shipment is coming in soon. Sonny says if they do this right, they’ll shut down the gun runners and Ava.

BTW, everyone, with the exception of Nicholas and Hayden, is at the MetroCourt. Was there ever any doubt of that?

Hayden, Nicholas and Laura have a celebration toast. Laura wishes them many happy years together. Hayden thanks her and gives her a hug.

Nina, who is rocking an amazing suit, gets off the phone with Maxie and tells Nathan the shoot went well. He tells her he’s moved in with Maxie.

Maxie tells Julian that Olivia and Leo nailed their pictures. Maxie says Dillon captured the bond between mother and child. Julian is checking out the pictures and offers to bring the flash-drive to Nina. Olivia wants to go with him. I would too, but for — oh, she’s of the same mind as I am. She wants to make sure he doesn’t destroy the photos.

Alexis joins Tracy and Michael. She says Sam is doing well and Jason is with her. She says Nicholas has filed a motion to dismiss and she anticipates the judge wanting them to settle. Michael says he’s 100% sure he wants to pursue it.

Max asks Sonny if he’s ready for action. Sonny says he’s getting stronger every day and reminds Max not to tell anybody about his progress. Carly interrupts and tells Sonny he has an appointment with his new doctor.

Dillon tells Maxie that even if Julian interferes, he always keeps a back-up. She says that Nina has a solid concept, unlike the fluke of the green issue. She says they’re covering real women in all shapes and sizes, but something’s missing. Dillon says they’re great but they’re all mature.

Nina asks what happened to Nathan’s place at Kelly’s and he says he has no heat and crashed with Maxie and they decided to make it permanent. He says they started out as roommates and it’s come full circle. He says it’s a little crowded, but it seems right. Nina says she feels the same way about Franco and they even talked about having a child.

Alexis says it could be three years before they go to trial. Whoever said the wheels of justice turn slowly wasn’t just whistlin’ Dixie. Michael thinks maybe he should go to Diane because she’s not related to Julian. Alexis says he should do what he wants, but she didn’t approve of Nicholas’s actions and her loyalty is with her grandson. Tracy says that’s good enough for her. Alexis says her goal is to return ELQ to its proper owner.

When she leaves, Michael tells Tracy he still has doubts about Alexis. Tracy says she has more irons in the fire and not to worry.

Hayden gets a text from Tracy. She tells Nicholas she’s needed at the office. He tells her she’s married to the company owner, so she can blow it off. She says if she doesn’t go, she won’t be able to show off her ring. When she leaves, Nicholas thanks Laura for being nice to Hayden, but also says he thinks Laura is holding something back.

Epiphany says she has a good feeling about Sonny’s new doctor, and says they’ve certainly gone through a few of them. Griffin comes in and says he’s ready for his new patient, Michael. Epiphany says no one calls him Michael, and introduces him to Sonny, who she says is usually preceded by his reputation. Griffin is clueless about Sonny’s mob business, so Epiphany says he’s just a difficult patient. Carly asks what brought Griffin there. He says GH has a great reputation and he went to med school with Lucas who told him about the job. Carly says Lucas is her brother. Sonny asks what Griffin is going to do for him.

Laura says Hayden is a virtual stranger and Nicholas doesn’t know what secrets she’s keeping. He says Spencer adores her and Laura says he adored Brit too. So did I. Nicholas says for a wedding gift, Laura can be accepting.

Nina tells Nathan how Franco feels about having their own child and passing on his DNA. She says they discussed other options, but decided to table it for now.

Dillon suggests Maxie pose for the magazine. She objects, but he says her experience put the magazine on the stands and she has exactly what the issue needs to make it pop.

Olivia looks over the pictures with Julian. No surprise he has a criticism about nearly every photo. Olivia asks when he became her boss and asks what’s going on. She says he’s married to someone else, yet he doesn’t want anyone looking at her. At that moment, Alexis enters.

Tracy says she won’t rest until ELQ is back in the family. Michael asks what the plan is, but Tracy says only she needs to know. She sees Hayden come in and tells Michael he can go because they’re just irritating each other. He tells her to be careful and not ruin things.

After he’s gone, Hayden sits down. Tracy asks where Hayden has been and Hayden says Vegas. Tracy says Laura was right and asks if Hayden is married. Yep, she is.

Nathan says if Nina and Franco decide to have kids, the kids will be lucky. He says he knows she would be a wonderful mother, and with her influence, Franco will be a great father. Nina wonders if growing up with Madilyn has scarred her for life. Nathan says he turned out fine, although until Maxie, he didn’t think he’d ever trust anyone again.

Dillon tells Maxie to trust him and do a test shoot. He suggests they give Nina a bonus when they bring the photos back. He takes pictures of Maxie, one of which is her pointing to The Floating Rib sign. Does that place really need more advertising? He takes a lot of photos with Maxie all over the pool table. Why am I not surprised that they eat, live and work here?

Alexis seconds it that Julian is acting like a jealous boyfriend. He says nothing is going on, but he doesn’t want Leo’s mother exposing herself. Alexis says his attitude is not only sexist, but he’s making it sound like he wants to control the women in his life, of which Olivia isn’t one. He tells Alexis she’s the only woman for him.

Tracy admires the ring. She asks when Nicholas is going to fork over ELQ to Hayden. Hayden tells Tracy she had to sign a prenup.

Griffin goes over Sonny’s medical history. He asks about Sonny’s pain level and Sonny says it depends on the PT. Sonny gets cagey when Griffin asks about his progress. He says he has some sensation in his legs, but nothing major. Griffin says that’s still good news.

Carly asks Griffin when Sonny will be able to walk again. He says it’s impossible to predict recovery, but if Sonny continues with his PT, in time he’ll regain the use of his legs. He leaves to double-check something. Griffin sees Epiphany in the hallway and asks about Sonny’s progress.

Sonny wonders what Griffin went to double-check. Sonny tells Carly that just because he seems like a good guy doesn’t mean he’s a good doctor. Griffin returns.

Nina comes to the office where Olivia is still looking at the proofs. She says Julian doesn’t look too happy, but Olivia says that’s because he’s a jerk. Nina says Olivia made her job difficult because she’s so gorgeous.

Alexis says she overreacted because Julian did. They talk about the impending wedding.

Tracy asks if Hayden looked over the prenup and Hayden says she didn’t have time. Tracy says Hayden has thwarted their plan. She says working with her has been a collasal waste of time. Hayden asks Tracy to give her a little more time. Tracy says the only thing she’s accomplished so far is a quickie wedding that she’ll get nothing from when Nicholas divorces her. Hayden says she has something on Nicholas.

Laura says worrying is part of being a parent. She asks how Nicholas would feel if Spencer were in his shoes. She says he wants to make things up to Spencer and give him a mother, and that Hayden is also the only one supporting his ELQ takeover. He tells her about the prenup, but Laura doesn’t think it’s enough to protect him.

Laura says love develops over time, shared experiences and getting to know each other. She tells Nicholas not to assume anything. She says she hopes she’s wrong about Hayden and they have a long, happy life and Nicholas is loved the way he deserves to be. She leaves and Nicholas gets on the laptop and Googles Baxter.

Hayden says the same way Tracy has leverage over her, she has leverage over Nicholas. Tracy says as long as she has the nerve to use it and Hayden says it won’t be a problem. Tracy calls her “Rachel” and says she can make Hayden’s life miserable. She starts to says something about Nicholas and spaces out mid-sentence.

Dillon and Maxie look over the shots. Dillon tells Maxie how gorgeous and fabulous she is. He says she pretends to be shallow, and it diverts people from who she really is. He says the camera has captured her real woman self, just as Nathan walks in.

Nina tells Olivia that the pictures are peaceful and beautiful, and thanks her for being able to portray real women to her readers. She says the have a few real women candidates coming in today. In walks Epiphany.

Griffin wants another round of scans. Carly and Sonny says that’s fine with them. Carly gets a call about a booking conflict at the hotel and has to leave. I’ll bet there’s a lot of booking conflicts, since it’s the only place anyone ever goes. When she’s gone, Griffin tells Sonny he’s a lucky man. Sonny says Carly is his rock. Griffin says the right partner can make all the difference. Then he asks Sonny why he’s lying to Carly.

Tomorrow, Nicholas finds out more about Baxter and Hayden tells Tracy not to mention her father again.

Little Women: Atlanta

Emily and Bri decide to go horseback riding. Emily has been riding horses since she was a tot. She says everyone always tried to put her on a pony, but she’s comfortable with the big guys. Actually, jockeys aren’t that tall. I guess the main problem is the leg proportion. Emily is hoping the good vibes from the housewarming party, where she made her pregnancy announcement, carry over. She’s invited the twins to go riding with them.

Minnie and her mom are getting pedicures. Minnie’s mom suggests the foot bath is like a wading pool to her and I laugh with them. The twins join them. Minnie talks about her altercation with Juicy. The twins ask how she’s going to handle it when they see each other at the club. Minnie says as long as Juicy is cool, she’ll be cool.

They talk about Emily’s announcement. The twins have decided she must be lying and just wants attention. They want to get to the bottom of it. There are many jokes I could make here, but it’s too easy.

Bri and Emily are out shopping. Bri asks Emily what she’s going to do about boyfriend Lontel’s lack of enthusiasm for the pregnancy. Emily says eventually he’ll come around. Bri thinks Lontel should step up or Emily should ditch him. Emily doesn’t want to take advice from someone whose baby daddy is just stringing her along. Maybe I’ll actually catch his name this episode.

I’ve already come to the conclusion that these Atlanta little women are the Lifetime version of Bravo’s Real Housewives of Potomac. Both channels are slumming here. I’d like to know where the NYC little women went.

Monie’s boyfriend, Morlen, is moving in with her. She’s wondering if she can deal with him 24/7 even though she loves him. They talk about her job at the salon and Morlen asks how they’re divying up the bills. She wants him to pay everything. He says they’ll work on it until she gets her voice over career going.

The twins go to Emily’s house with a baby gift. They also want her to prove she’s pregnant. They think she’s lying, but if she is really pregnant, it means more jobs for them. Emily says she thinks she’s around 8 weeks. They ask if she’s still going to be working the clubs. Emily figures they’re trying to steal her turf. She asks if they want to go horseback riding and they’re cool with that, but when they get outside, start talking smack.

Wooda is the name of Bri’s baby daddy. More jokes abound in my head. Bri asks Wooda where the relationship is going. He thinks it’s cool as is, but knows she wants more. She says he basically can see other people, but she can’t. He claims not to like the dudes she hangs out with. Bri says she wants the family thing, and asks if he wants her to start looking around. He says he doesn’t want that, but she’s gotta do what she’s gotta do. She wants to keep them together, but he doesn’t think it really matters to son Malik whether they’re actually together or not.

Bri says if Wooda won’t commit, she’s moving on. This means going to the club. How this is different from what she normally does, I’m not sure. Minnie says she’s done with her pseudo boyfriend and is also looking for love.

Some dudes join their table. One of them has six kids. Emily says the club is filled with baby mama drama and you have to weed them out. Dude says he’s kidding. Bri says none of them is her type, but she’s trying to be open. When they leave, Andre, the guy she was dancing with, follows her out and asks for her number. He does seem kind of cute, and would probably treat her better than Shooda Cooda Wooda.

Minnie’s boss, Miss Paula, is ticked because Monie is late and the stations aren’t set up. Minnie tells Monie that Miss Paula is going to evaluate her and she needs to step it up. Monie is shocked that she has to work at work. Miss Paula asks her how she thinks she’s done as well as productivity goes. She says today is the only day she wasn’t on point. Miss Paula asks what she’s passionate about. When Monie tells her, “voice overs,” Miss Paula says she’s in the wrong profession, and if she doesn’t want to be a stylist, she shouldn’t be there. Monie grumbles and Miss Paula says she can leave the salon now. Minnie is pretty embarrassed, although I’m wondering what she told Miss Paula to get Monie the job, since she knew this wasn’t Monie’s career choice.

Minnie tells Monie she needs to take her job seriously. Monie says nobody is going to tell her what to do. That would cancel out most jobs then. Minnie asks why she bothered doing her this favor and Monie says she was trying to prove to Morlen that she could hold down a job. Congrats on making it for a whole week.

Minnie drives the twins to an interview at a club. They talk smack about the Cheeks. Minnie says they work there sometimes, and the twins say that once they horn in, the Cheeks won’t be working as much. I might have to take a shower after this episode.

Club Bugaloo is apparently the hottest club in Atlanta. I’ll take their word for it. The manager tells them the Cheeks work there already, so why should she hire the twins? They say because they’re better. Very eloquent. They climb on to the bar via some swings (I hope this club has insurance) and do some twerking. The manager says she’ll talk to the owner and get back to them.

Bri is getting ready for a date with Andre. She says Wooda acts like he doesn’t care if she goes out, but he does, and since he claims he’s just there for their son, he can stay home and take care of him. Word!

Bri meets Andre. Bri says this is the first date in a while for her and she’s hoping Andre doesn’t just have a fetish. She explains her deal with Wooda. She says she lost her father when she was young and she’s searching for guys to give her what she lost. Pretty astute, although she does seem like the smartest of the bunch.

She and Andre go to a carnival or small amusement park or something. They talk relationships and he’s no dummy for a young guy. Bri says she needs to work on herself before opening up to anyone else. Andre says they should just play it by ear. I think she should go on another date with him.

At the stables, Bri tells Emily about Andre. Emily says no baby mama drama is a plus, but she doesn’t think Bri seems ready yet. Emily tells Bri about the twins selling themselves at Bugaloo and how they were trash talking the Cheeks.

Minnie and the twins show up and the twins are somewhat intimidated by the size of the horses. The way they agreed so readily to riding, I figured they’d gone before. It’s sort of like a pony ride for them and Minnie; a guy leads the horses around a ring with them in the saddles.

Emily is riding like a boss. Of course this leads the twins to thinking she’s not pregnant again. Because you can’t do anything normal when you’re pregnant. I don’t think these two have a lot going on in the smarts department.

After the riding lesson, the girls have a picnic. The twins announce their hiring at Bugaloo. Emily says the promoter called and told her about the twins’ remarks. The twins say the Cheeks do the same thing and Emily says ain’t nobody got time for that. She asks how they found the club and they tell her through Minnie. Emily asks why, out of the billions of clubs, do they have to work at the same place?

This leads the twins to thinking Emily isn’t pregnant again because they can only retain one thought between them. One of them pulls a pregnancy test out of her purse and one of them goes to the porta-potty with Emily. Yep, she’s pregnant, you two idiots. Emily says her doctor cleared her for riding and asks if there are any other questions.

Next week, the twins grow tired of their living arrangements with their boyfriends, the girls go on some kind of retreat, and Monie throws a drink in Juicy’s face.

Little Women: LA

Tonya and Terra are bathing their dogs. Terra tells Tonya about the effort to get Briana back with her family. Terra thinks Briana is being controlled by Matt and has lost her family because of him. Tonya is concerned, but says you can’t help someone who doesn’t want help.

Briana has been married to Matt for 7 months now, and says they’re a tight family along with her daughter, Leiana. Briana says she was blindsided by Terra and Christy confronting her at Elena’s launch party. Matt tells her that he could care less about her family after the things they’ve said about him. Matt says they’ll never get an apology from him, but he wants to know what she wants to do. Briana says she doesn’t feel the need to deal with them after what’s been said.

Jasmine approaches her dad about giving Chris a job. Her dad came from Mexico when he was a teenager and built his own business. He tells Jasmine he loves her and not to worry; Chris can work there on the weekends. He seems like a straight-up guy.

Aww, Terra’s cat, Zeus, disappeared. She’s making lost cat flyers with Christy. She also wants to go over the Briana thing. She thought Matt was being over-dramatic and is concerned about Matt not wanting his future child to see her grandparents. Neither one of them trust Matt. Christy says Briana is a different person and looks unhappy. Terra wants to ask Jasmine for advice, since she’s closer to Briana. Christy suggests doing something fun like apple picking.

Tonya is Facetiming with her daughter’s father, Kerwin. They’ve been in an on and off again relationship for years, but she’s been the one who didn’t want commitment. She’s ready to settle down now and asks if there’s a future for them. He says he has a girlfriend and asks about her boyfriend. She says they’re just friends now. She doesn’t want to break up the friendship between her and her ex, but she wants Kerwin to drop his girlfriend completely. Kerwin says they have to talk in person and he’s willing to come out to see her.

Jasmine is making dinner and asks Chris if he’s had any calls from the railroad. He has, but they’re all out of state. She tells him about her dad’s offer of a job. Chris says he doesn’t know how he feels about it. Jasmine says right now he should at least give the restaurant a shot, since she doesn’t really want to move. Chris says he’s willing to check it out.

Tonya is doing target practice with a rifle. Terra is with her and the gun is as big as she is. Bigger actually. The guy brings her something smaller, but it still looks pretty big to me. Terra says she could see it going south as a group event and it’s good they’re going apple picking instead tomorrow.

Tonya tells Terra about Kerwin coming. Terra is concerned it’s just a rebound. Tonya says Kerwin loves her for her and that’s what she wants.

Preston brings red roses home to Elena. She says he’s always been supportive of her ideas. Elena tells him about not being invited to Jasmine’s party and the following confrontation. Elena says she doesn’t trust Jasmine anymore and didn’t invite her to the makeup launch party.

Elena brings up starting a family. Preston asks if she’s ready. She says she’s ready for a baby with her baby, and Preston kisses her. Lots of romantic stuff.

Jasmine needs to organize her closet, so she invites Briana over to see if she wants anything. She also wants the skinny on Elena’s party. Briana says no one talked about Jasmine, but tells her about how Christy and Terra approached her about mending fences with her family. Jasmine says she can’t imagine life without her family and hopes Briana can get back together with hers. Briana says they have two different families. She says hers tossed her out of the house because she was with Matt and have said awful things.

Jasmine says Briana needs a friend to support her right now. Briana says the other girls are judging her and they don’t know her family.

Christy’s parents have just moved in with them and they’re looking for a house with more space. She says it has to be a house that’s little people friendly, but it also has to please her mom. She doesn’t want to hear complaints for the rest of her life. The first house has a lot of stairs and Todd points out that it will be hard to carry a baby up and down. Christy thinks his real concern is his weight though, as she noticed he had a tough time navigating the steps.

On to apple picking! Tonya said her people picked cotton way back when, so she’s switching roles this time around. Ha-ha! Jasmine asks about Elena’s event. Christy talks about approaching Briana and how Matt seemed to be controlling the situation. Tonya says a man shouldn’t put a wedge between her and the family. Jasmine says Briana has been telling her that Matt did want to get them together. Jasmine is concerned about Matt not wanting Briana’s parents to see their future grandchild.

Terra arrives and says Elena can’t make it. Jasmine asks if it has to do with her and Terra says no, but Jasmine isn’t too sure. Briana arrives and Jasmine says it’s from one awkward situation to the next.

The apple lady says the trees are over 100 years old and gives them poles to pick the apples with. Briana says it looks easier than she thought, but it’s not. The poles are really long and probably difficult for an average sized person to maneuver.

There are some donkeys and miniature horses in a pen, and Terra and Jasmine check them out. Terra takes the opportunity to tell Jasmine how she should approach Briana with caution in regard to Matt. Jasmine says she probably has a softer way of dealing with things, but she wants to find out if Matt really said what Terra told her.

After the picking comes the drinking. Terra tells Briana she doesn’t want to pressure her or get in her business, but wants her to consider meeting with her parents. Christy says Matt is the one who doesn’t want to meet with them. Briana says it’s the way her family is going about it that he doesn’t like.

Jasmine tells Briana she’s sorry about what she’s gone through, but maybe Briana should meet with her parents without Matt. Tonya is tired of the pussyfooting around and tells Briana this wasn’t a problem before Matt and she shouldn’t allow a man to put a wedge between her and her family. Briana says that her parents think nothing is ever good enough and the girls say that’s just the way parents are.

Tonya says Matt was dead wrong to say her parents can’t see their future grandchild. She says no man should be allowed that option. She tells Briana Matt has total control over her. Briana says she’s never seen Tonya so upset. Tonya says Briana’s family was there for her before Matt was ever in the picture.

Terra says she knows Briana has a new family now, but she also has her roots. Tonya asks if Briana is going to see her family and Briana says she’ll think about it. Tonya says everyone has said their piece so, moving on.

They don’t want us to know what’s going to happen next week. I wonder if it’s that bad.