Tag Archives: Real Housewives of the OC

Dec10

December 9, 2015 — Port Charles, L.A., a Divorcee & a Wife

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

Lulu says what the hell and has another shot with Johnny.

Dante and Valerie go back to Dante’s place where they continue to make me ill.

Michael asks Felix if Dr. Lee is around. She’s not, but Michael says he wants to talk to her about Sabrrrina.

Sabrrrina is waiting for Michael at The Floating Rib and sees Patrick at the bar. He says he feels like he’s having a bad dream that he can’t wake up from. Welcome to my life.

Sam tells Jason that Elizabeth knew for months who he really is. He says it was a mistake to come over. Sam says he knows deep down something isn’t right and he can run away or hear her out.

Elizabeth tries to call Jason, but he doesn’t pick up. He says she’s probably worried about him, and Sam says she’s worried about something all right. Sam says he can run back to Elizabeth or give her five minutes to tell him the truth. He says she’s got five minutes.

Dante and Valerie are making out when there’s a knock at the door. Valerie makes herself scarce, but for once it’s not Lulu. It’s Olivia with Rocco. She asks how long the nonsense with Lulu is going to go on and when are they getting back together. Valerie eavesdrops. No surprise.

Johnny and Lulu flirt a little. Johnny says he was hoping he could stay there. He says his offshore accounts are being monitored, but if she can spare some cash, he’ll pay her back with interest. She tells him he can crash there, but she’ll have to see what she can spare. Dillon shows up and Johnny hides behind the bar.

Michael says he’s concerned about the baby’s size. Felix says it’s wrong to go behind Sabrrrina’s back, and that the baby is healthy and everything’s fine. Michael asks him to come with him to meet Sabrrrina.

Patrick, who has a nerve even discussing this with Sabrrrina, says he has trust issues with Sam now. Sabrrrina says she came out of things with Patrick fine (well, if you can call telling Michael that Carrrlos’s baby is his “ fine”), and he has to decide if he wants to fight for Sam or not.

Elizabeth leaves a message for Jason. Jake comes downstairs and says he can’t sleep, and wonders where Jason is.

Jason asks what proof Sam has. She tells him about how she found Elizabeth in the chapel and Elizabeth said she was hesitant to marry him because of Sam. She didn’t understand it at the time, but now she knows it’s because Elizabeth knew Jason was her husband already. She also tells him about Jake keeping a secret with Elizabeth and Laura. She tells him to open his eyes. She asks if Elizabeth has ever almost told him something and stopped, or shown him some other kind of weirdness. Jason asks if she’s just trying to convince herself so that they can get back together.

Dillon asks if he can talk to Lulu. She says now isn’t the time and she has to get the boat decorated. He says he can help, but she says she works better alone. He asks if he ruined their friendship.

Dante asks if he can talk to Olivia in the morning. She tells him to think of Rocco. He says it isn’t working out with Lulu and Olivia says he sounds like he’s giving up and he has to fight for his marriage. Isn’t that what you want? she asks.

Sabrrrina says when she saw Robin in the church, she knew things were over between her and Patrick, and she could have saved everyone a lot of heartache by just accepting it. She says he has to make a choice and that dragging it out causes the most damage. Michael comes in with Felix. They invite Patrick to join them for dinner, but he takes a pass.

Elizabeth tells Jake that his daddy will be home soon. Jake asks why she said she was worried in her phone message and she says that’s what moms do.

Sam says she understands that Jason doesn’t remember their life together, but she thinks he deserves to know the truth. She says that if Elizabeth had had her way, she and Danny would have never known he was back. She says to look into her eyes and then go home and look into Elizabeth’s eyes. IMO, he knows Sam is telling him the truth.

Felix makes something up to get rid of Michael for a minute. He tells Sabrrrina that Michael is asking questions about the size of the baby.

Lulu says she didn’t love that DIllon publicly exposed Dante as a cheater, but only Dante is responsible for his actions and she wouldn’t take her anger out on him. She suggests they “hit the reset button.”

Olivia asks Dante if he loves Lulu and wants to save his marriage or is he just throwing up his hands and giving up. Dante says Lulu still doesn’t trust him. Please. It’s only been five minutes and even after that you couldn’t wait until the body was cold. Olivia says there’s nothing odd about that, and he shouldn’t let the love of his life go. Dante tells Olivia about what happened on Thanksgiving and she calls Valerie a home wrecker. I concur.

Patrick comes home and Sam tells him Jason went back to Elizabeth and he has to figure out his own life.

Jason gets back to Elizabeth’s. Jake has fallen asleep on the couch. Jason says as soon as he gets Jake settled, he wants to talk to her.

Lulu tells Dillon that she and Dante are officially separated. She tells him Dante signed the papers, but doesn’t mention Valerie being there. She says she thinks Dante wants the marriage over and she does too. Dillon says he doesn’t believe it because she seems miserable. He says no matter what, he’ll be supportive. The he tells her he’s moving back to L.A.

Olivia says she thought Valerie was a one-time thing. Dante says he did too, but things changed. Olivia says Valerie was a mistake and he needs to man up and get rid of his bed buddy. Dante says Valerie is his friend and not to talk about her like that. Olivia says that it’s too bad he doesn’t have the same concern for his marriage.

Felix says that it’s better if Michael hears the truth from Sabrrrina rather than someone else and that when Monica sees the sonogram, she’s going to know.

Sam tells Patrick she told Jason everything. He asks if Jason believed her and Sam says he wanted proof. She brings up her interaction with Elizabeth in the chapel.

Jason comes back downstairs. Elizabeth asks where he was and he says he needed to talk to Sam. Elizabeth asks why he’d want to hear more of her lies. She says Sam is trapped in the past and she wants him to be trapped with her. Jason asks Elizabeth if she knew who he was before he did.

Olivia leaves and Valerie comes out of hiding. Valerie says she doesn’t think Olivia likes her too much, which is an understatement. Dante says she’s a fair person and will come around.

Dillon says he has to go where the work is. Lulu says, what about New York, but Dillon says his heart is in the San Fernando Valley.  (Ha-ha! I almost typed Valerie.) Johnny makes a noise and Dillon hears it.

When Michael gets back to the table, Felix says he’s got to jet.

Sam tells Patrick that what Jason chooses to do with the information she gave him is up to him. Patrick says he doesn’t know if he can trust her because she says one thing, but her actions indicate she’s still in love with Jason. She says a part of her will always love him, but she’s let that go. Patrick says she’s lying to herself and the future they were building doesn’t apply anymore

Elizabeth dodges the question totally, going on and on about how Sam is jealous and being spiteful. He says just answer the question, but she still doesn’t. Whoa. He says she’s making him not trust her by her evasiveness and if she doesn’t answer, he’s leaving. About time.

Valerie is sitting with Rocco and I tell her to take her hands off Lulu’s kid. Dante steps out to the store and I wonder who is going to show up while he’s gone.

Lulu asks Dillon if he wants to go to dinner. She tells him the noise was probably a harbor seal. Aren’t they in New York state? He pretends to go along with it, but then finds Johnny behind the bar.

I am so psychic. There’s a knock at Dante’s door and it’s Olivia.

Michael tells Sabrrrina that he’s worried about her. She says she understands it’s a scary time for him. He says he still wants to talk to the doctor, but she says they need to set up an appointment together. She asks if they can give it a rest for tonight though and just enjoy dinner. Good luck with that.

Patrick says he loves Sam, but he doesn’t think they can make it. He says she really wants to be with Jason and that’s okay because she deserves to be happy. He tells her they’re over.

Elizabeth tells Jason that the truth is she loves him. He doesn’t care, he wants his question answered. She says she accepted him with no questions asked. He says he just wants one question answered and why can’t she – OMG – SHE’S SAYING IT! SHE LIED ABOUT KNOWING WHO HE IS!

Tomorrow, everyone asks for more time with everything and Robin has some scenes.

Million Dollar Listing: Los Angeles

JoshA brings Heather breakfast in bed. Heather isn’t pregnant and Josh is a little disappointed. Heather is surprised at that, but Josh says that when confronted with the possibility, he realized that she was a priority. She says he’s sweet and who exchanged him for the real Josh? He says he was just making excuses before, but now he’s ready for whatever comes. He wants to get married asap and suggests early spring.

They call Josh’s parents in Barcelona. I wonder what being a jet setter is like. He tells his mom that he and Heather are getting married April 2nd, and she gets pretty excited.

Mauricio from the The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is the head of the agency where James and David work. They’re having their weekly staff meeting. David and James’s client looks like Dennis Hopper and scares me a little. The client is putting in an infinity pool to up the price on the house. The client wants it at $14 million, but David and James are like it’s more like $12.5. James says the best way to find out is an informal office poll.

JoshF is currently the number one agent in volume and two in commission. Josh and his husband are buying a house. Josh would rather live in a hotel, but he realizes Colton wants a normal life with a yard and a dog. The property is very pretty and Paul McCartney lives next door. Colton says it seems rushed though. Josh has gone from wanting to live at the Four Seasons, to Grandma Edith’s penthouse, to this house.

JoshF admits he’s been on an emotional roller coaster and Colton has been supportive, so he wants this for him. Colton says he thinks Josh is looking at it more as how much he can flip it for later, but Josh says he really wants some stability right now.

David is feeding his cute basset hounds. In a few weeks, he and Adrian are going to Italy where he’s going to propose. He tells Adrian he wants to bring the dogs (they have 5 between them), but he’s just having fun with her.

JoshA is selling a house on Doheny that he says has an “east coast vibe.” Unfortunately, it has construction going on next door, so they’ve had to drop the price by a million. In our language, I’m guessing that’s like $50K. He’s about to have a showing and his brother tells him the power is out. He’s checked the circuit breakers with no luck. The agent’s client is coming in the morning, so they show the agent the house using flashlights. Considering the camera people also have lighting, you can actually see it pretty well.  Josh says the consolation prize for the construction is the lowered price and the agent thinks it’s not a bad deal.

James and David are showing the infinity pool house to some agents. Did that guy just say there are no bathrooms upstairs? What kind of a skabillion dollar house is this? All of the agents agree that it’s worth closer to $12 million. They get together with scary guy Jay and tell him the bad news. Jay says they’re done because besides being scary, he’s unrealistic.

Jay says it’s a special project and they need to open up their minds. Ohmmm, James says they’re not going to spend a bunch of bucks in marketing to find out that they can’t sell it. Jay says he’s going in at $13.5 with them or without them. James and David say they’ll have to take a pass. David tells Jay he’s a schmuck if he goes with someone else after they gave him the idea for the pool that upped the value of the house. They all compromise at $12.995.

JoshF is getting himself beautified. His phone rings and he actually doesn’t answer it. It doesn’t matter. His office assistant hunts him down. He’d lost the house he wanted to buy to another buyer, and the seller is calling to see if he’s still interested. They go back and forth for a while with the assistant relaying the information. JoshF gets on the phone himself and says buyers aren’t exactly lining up for the property and makes a cash offer. He ends up getting the house. He says after Colton gets ahold of the property, it will be ready for Architectural Digest.

JoshA meets for lunch with Max and his business partner, John. He’s received an offer for the Doheny property, but both guys think it’s low. Josh says they should counter regardless. Josh calls the agent with a counter offer, but lets them know the clients really wanted to tell them to pound sand. He tells Max and John they should take the $8.5 million offer. He says if they wait, the market could change and the property could become stale. He says they should take the money and run. Everyone agrees. John says he’s never happy, but he’s satisfied.

Scary client Jay has everything staged and ready for the open house. The furniture has been custom made for the house and is included in the price. David is hoping they wrap things up quickly because he’s leaving for Italy the next day. Everything is gorgeous, but I think it would be weird moving into a place that had furniture already. I guess it’s good if you’re really busy.

James tells David that he wants him to enjoy himself in Italy and to turn his phone off and concentrate on Adrian.

JoshA was burned by JoshF showing a client a property before he could. He shows the client a different property. The client says he loves it, but he just bought the other property from JoshF. JoshA says compared to that property, this one is an estate and a better fit. And it’s move in ready. He says so much work needs to be done on the other one, he won’t be moving in for two years. The client decides to take the property and develop the one from JoshF. Since the sellers are also JoshA’s clients, he’s going to make out like a bandit.

It’s the finale. JoshA lists his blessings and says he feels like the luckiest guy on the planet.

David calls James and tells him Adrian said yes. He did a beautiful job in picking out the ring too. I’m impressed. David says how happy he is to be marrying the girl of his dreams.

James goes down Memory Lane with the properties he and David have sold. It’s been a phenomenal year.

Josh and Colton are moving into the new house. He reflects on the work ethic Grandma Edith gave him. He says things couldn’t be any better. He says although Edith isn’t with him any longer, he knows she’s looking down on him with pride.

Just a note on The Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce

This is a good show. Well written and acted. A divorcee Sex in the City. In the second season, main character Abby and her ex-husband are entertaining the notion of getting back together. Abby is hesitant though, because not only has she become the “new face of divorce” through her journalism, she’s enjoying her new life.

Last night, Bravo did a bit of a crossover. When Abby is out with her ex, she sees some paparazzi and assumes she’s been recognized. But it turns out they want Shannon from The Real Housewives of the OC . I like Shannon because she’s not afraid to poke fun at herself. When one of the photographers asks about her husband, she says it’s date night, the feng shui worked and to put nine in a bowl.

Nov24

November 23, 2015 — GH,SUR & Vicki

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

Anna makes an appointment with Dr. Andre, but says she has nothing to say. Well, there’s a waste of everyone’s time and money. Dr. Andre says he thinks it all has something to do with Duke. I finally had to look up Dr. Andre’s name, since no one will say it. I can’t believe I can’t get it to stick in my head when I used to go to a Dr. Andre.

Michael asks Sabrina why she canceled the sono.

Carly tells Sonny she thinks Morgan is in trouble. To back this up, Morgan acts like he’s out of his mind at the cabin. He runs outside and Kiki hears a gunshot.

Jason asks Helena how he can get his memory back.

Carly says Morgan has been more reckless than usual and she thinks he’s building to a manic episode. Building? He’s there. Morgan tells Kiki he just shot at a branch, but he’s sure there’s something out there and to stay inside and get down. Great.

Anna says peace isn’t an option for her at this point and she has a flashback of shooting Carrrlos. She tells Dr. Andre she was thinking about Duke.

Sabrrrina says the more she invests in the baby, the greater she’ll feel the loss if she doesn’t go to term. Michael asks if she’s not afraid he won’t stick around, and that he won’t be like that; he can’t wait for the baby to come. Until it comes out with an accent. Michael’s phone rings. It’s Kiki who tells him Morgan needs him.

Sam asks if there isn’t an antidote. Helena says Sam has an overactive imagination. She says she had nothing to do with Jason’s memory loss and there’s no such thing as an amnesia drug. (Ok, but I guess you can freeze someone for years and they wake up good as new.) Jason realizes that he lost his memory when he was in the car accident and Helena wasn’t involved with that. Jason asks who else knew his real identity. I doubt Helena is going to out Nicholas, but who knows with her.

Kiki explains what’s going on and Michael rushes out. Felix comes in and scolds Sabrrrina for not telling Michael about her concern that it’s Carrrlos’s baby.

Anna talks about her relationship with Duke, the ups and downs, and how they still loved each other no matter what. She said they became agonizingly close to making it, but then he was gunned down, collapsed when he got to her, and died in the hospital. Check Cassadine Island. Maybe he’s in the freeze tank. She tells the doctor that Julian was the man behind the murder, but Carrrlos carried it out. Instead of going after Carrrlos to turn state’s evidence, she killed him.

Carly and Sonny argue over who’s responsible for Morgan not seeing a shrink. I guess it couldn’t possibly be Morgan, since he’s 12. Michael pops into the gym and tells them that he heard from Kiki and thinks he knows where they are.

Kiki can’t find Morgan and picks up the phone to call Carly. Morgan comes in behind her and asks who she’s calling.

Helena likes how Jason gets to the point. She says she’s a connoisseur of irony and the room is filled with it. Boy, did she get that right. She calls out all the idiots as always. She reminds Elizabeth of her baby charade, and says she (meaning herself) has done worse, but never claimed to be an innocent flower. Sam tells her to quit stalling and Nicholas says she’s not, she doesn’t know the answer. Au contraire, Helena says, she’s going to make their trip worthwhile. I love her so much!

Anna says according to criminal justice, she murdered Carrrlos, even though she tried to kid herself that she did the world a good deed. Dr. Andre says he’s choosing to keep her confidence, and she needs to process what she did and how it’s affected her view of herself. Anna tells him someone else knows and is holding it over her head.

Carly and Michael leave for the cabin. Epiphany tells Sonny he has to stay. I’m sure she’ll be sitting at the mob boss table in no time, since she has the personality for it.

Morgan wants to know why Kiki was trying to call Carly, since they’re in this together. She tells him he’s making her nervous with the gun and to put it down. Surprisingly, he does. Then he tries to put the moves on her.

Helena tells Jason that the life he had is over, and he should figure out how to work with what he has now. Jason asks again who knew he was Jason. Helena starts to tell him and – you’ve got to be kidding me – she goes unconscious. With no warning? This is just not fair and I am not amused.

Anna says she can’t risk exposing her blackmailer. She says she’s going to comply until she’s in a position to turn the tables. Time’s up! Dr. Andre says it was a positive step and Anna thanks him.

Elizabeth tries CPR. The doctor comes in and pronounces Helena dead. I refuse to believe it. Nicholas tells the doctor to fix it and he says he can’t. I still refuse to believe it. Nicholas says he wants “a moment,” and the others leave. He tells Helena that he assumes she didn’t want it to end like this. And I still refuse to believe it. We thought Glenn from The Walking Dead was dead too, until last night. Get that woman into the freezer stat!

Carly shows up at the cabin with Michael and Max. Michael gives the gun to Max. Morgan whines that no one is taking Kiki away from him. Has he confused her with the gun? Carly says they’re there to help him.

Felix wants to cancel his Thanksgiving plans, but Sabrrrina says she can handle things and that she finally sees a way forward.

Anna thought she saw a way forward, but then sees Carrrlos. I guess that session didn’t exactly set everything right. I swear, Carrrlos is getting more play on this show dead than he did alive.

Epiphany says Carly is very capable and a great mom, so Sonny has nothing to worry about. She tells him that he’s no angel, but he’s always done right by his children. Sonny frets that Morgan got his mental illness from him.

Morgan insists Kiki doesn’t want to leave. Kiki says she’s the one who called Michael. Carly tells Morgan that she’s sure he’s feeling awesome right now, but it’s going to change when he comes down. He says he’s changed his mind about seeing a shrink and doesn’t want to. Carly says she loves him and won’t give up on him. She says if he gets evaluated at the hospital, and they say there’s nothing wrong, she’ll back off. Morgan tries to leave, but Max grabs him

Elizabeth tries to say everything’s cool and let’s go home. Jason says too bad about Helena, he wants to know the truth now. Nicholas tells him the Jason he knew wouldn’t be wallowing in self-pity, so apparently his face isn’t the only thing that changed. I’m not sure where he’s getting the self-pity thing from though. Why shouldn’t he want to know?

Anna chases Carrrlos’s ghost and finds a pendant on the ground. It’s engraved with Carrrlos and Sabrrrina. Just as I’m about to say that ghosts don’t wear jewelry, Carrrlos shows up at Sabrrrina’s door. YEEESSS! Although it’s probably not good to startle a pregnant woman like that.

Jason attacks Nicholas. He tells him to go ahead and grieve, but he’ll see him later. The doctor says Helena’s passing was unexpected, that he thought she had at least a few months. Well, I think she still does because I don’t believe it. Elizabeth takes Jason by the hand like he’s one of her kids and they leave with Sam in the rear.

Nicholas tells Helena that he hated her as much as he respected her, that she was elegant, fearless and didn’t give a rat’s ass what anyone thought about her. He says he’ll find a way to grieve and I fully expect her to sit up and slap him upside the head.

Sonny tells Epiphany how he hid his illness so no one would think he was weak, and he gave Morgan the same attitude. He says Morgan doesn’t want to take the medication and give up the highs, and admits he feels the same way, but still takes his meds.

Morgan tells Carly and Kiki he hates them as Max and Michael drag him out the door.

Tomorrow, more Carrrlos!

Vanderpump Rules

Katie has a fashion blog, and is discussing her vision with Scheana. Scheana fills in Katie and Schwartz on her talk with Lisa about Shay. Schwartz has been knocked for a loop that Shay is having addiction problems. Well, Scheana was good at keeping it a secret and then let everyone know at once.

Scheana is doing a photo shoot for Katie’s blog, but she’s having a hard time putting on her happy face.

Lala is at the SUR register and Jax comes over to bother her. Jax is just so undesirable, I don’t get why all the ladies are attracted to him. I guess Lala is from Utah, and Jax asks some obscene TMI questions about Mormons. We all know Jax has a foot fetish and it makes me think about that too. Lisa breaks up the conversation because, you know, you’re supposed to work at work.

Lisa basically says don’t crap in your own backyard, and doesn’t like that out of all the women in L.A., Jax has to bug her hostess. Jax’s not-a-girlfriend-yet is going to be moving to L.A. and Lisa says she’s in for some disappointment since Jax doesn’t know what the word “commitment” means.

The guys all go for a night out. James talks about how often he and Kristen break up. He says all they do is fight until they find something new to fight about. They’re going for counseling, and Tom says the therapist is going to end up needing a therapist. Schwarz is acting all mature and talking about getting a real job.

Jax asks what they think about Lala. James is obviously getting quite intoxicated and a lot of animation goes along with it. He says something that barely makes sense; so much so, that I can’t even put it together in my head to type out.

James wakes up with a hangover – and Kristen in his face. Who needs this kind of life? She talks to him like she’s his mom. He says he’s been away for 38 seconds, and it’s already the worst day of his life.

They go to couples therapy. Kristen says she’s been going to therapy for 9 months (!) already and it’s done a world of good. I think she’s wasting her money. The therapist says it sounds like there’s some unhealthy things happening. This is an understatement. She says they have to stop the retaliation thing. James lists the lies that Kristen has told in the past, and says she tries to parent him. (What did I say?) Kristen claims he has a lack of responsibility. She talks about him cheating with her ex-friend, Jenna. James lied and told her that he only made out with Jenna, so I’m not sure if she considers that cheating or if she knows he really did have sex with Jenna. The therapist asks if they want to work it out or do they just want to stay angry and keep hurting each other? Kristen says what they’re doing isn’t working (another understatement) and James heaves a huge sigh.

Swartz, Ariana, Tom and Katie are triple dating with Peter and his girlfriend, Sara. Sara has a 4 year old, and Schwartz says they’ve never met a grown-up before. Ha-ha! They all discuss their views on marriage. Tom says he could see getting married, but Ariana isn’t so sure that’s what she wants. Everyone looks at Schwartz because it’s down to the wire with Katie’s proposal ultimatum.

Tom brings up Shay. Schwartz says it’s obvious he and Scheana aren’t communicating. Well, yeah, he hasn’t been home in days. Ariana says they’re both good at putting up a happy front. They talk about Shay’s drinking and how it’s just depressing him more. Tom says because Shay isn’t bringing in the bucks right now, he feels inferior. He thinks they should have a couple’s intervention.

James flirts with Lala at the first opportunity.

Tom and Schwartz want to approach Lisa about an idea. Schwartz says that he’s been on enough auditions to know you have to dress the part, so they wear their business attire. Or what passes for that in L.A. They go to Lisa’s phenomenal house, Villa Rosa. First, Tom talks about Shay. They agree that he’s feeling emasculated. Tom asks if Lisa could give him a job at PUMP. She says he needs to get clean and sober before he can execute a work plan, and she doesn’t think working in a bar will help. She does say that she’s impressed with their concern for their friend. So am I.

Pandora and her husband, Jason, are also there, looking gorgeous as ever. Tom talks about how he goes back to St. Louis once a year and he’s well-known there and wants to promote Lisa’s sangria. Pandora says she gets it, but she thinks it should be a global endeavor. Lisa says the guys probably don’t quite understand how big this could be. Pandora says they constantly get resumés, but of course they’d rather go with local people they know. She says they’d have to take it seriously, not like they do their jobs at SUR. Lisa tells them to think about it. Schwartz says walking out with a homework assignment wasn’t ideal, but it was better than a no.

Schwartz and Katie come to visit Scheana, who’s waiting for Shay to come home. Tom and Ariana follow. Scheana says Shay is more comfortable talking in a group setting, so she’s invited them there for…what? I guess to discuss their issues. Shay comes in. Hugs all around.  Shay and Scheana both start crying.

Shay says he’s been going through a lot of personal stuff and he’s been staying with his parents. He says he got everyone’s messages, but needed space. Tom asks if he feels like he’s addicted to the. Shay says he’s been taking five a day and at max, ten. I’m pretty sure no doctor is prescribing ten a day unless you’re dying. He says he’s been on them since he’s known them, which is definitely news. He says he was afraid of being judged, so he never said anything. Scheana says she didn’t realize she’d married an addict and she feels like he’s miserable with her. She says she’s been unhappy and lonely, and why did he marry her? Tom tells her to pull back. Shay says he’s intimidated by her, that when he expresses himself, she interrupts him and controls the conversation. He says he’d rather just stay in the background. Ariana says Shay needs to be more assertive and Scheana needs to give it a rest.

Shay apologizes and says he’s back to stay. He says he has to work on some things and Scheana says he needs to be more forward and cut her off. He needs to tell her to stop and let him finish. I like the both of them and hope they’re able to work things out. I don’t think either one of them is the brightest bulb in the box, but that’s less important than their good hearts.

Jax brings not-quite-a-girlfriend, Britney, in for an interview at PUMP. Once again, she shows up underdressed. Lisa asks for her resumé, and once again, she doesn’t have it. Has she ever had a job before? Lisa asks where she’s worked. Hooters. I’m not making that up either. Yes, I know it’s a job, but she might as well have said McDonald’s. Lisa says it’s good she didn’t bring her resumé, because it gives her a reason to say it’s not going to work out. She tells Britney that it’s a problem because she’s dating Jax. Jax says they don’t have to work at the same restaurant, but she tells them inter-company dating isn’t encouraged. Bye, Felicia.

Shay and Scheana are having dinner on tray tables. She says she can’t wait until they eat like humans at a real dining table. He feels he hasn’t been able to get a word in edgewise, and she says she’s working on it. Shay says he wants to leave the person he was behind. Apparently, Scheana doesn’t understand addiction, because she says in her individual interview that she doesn’t think a completely sober person would be fun to be married to, and thinks it’s okay for him to just get a buzz on once in a while. Then she presents him with a drug test, and says she’ll give him a pass on weed. If I was him, I’d be stocking up on those loose joints from the park right now. She says she wants to be able to trust him again, and I get where she’s coming from, but geez. Overwhelm him why don’t you?

Cool! Julie and Brandy from The People’s Couch are doing commercials for Bravo now – and hosting the Vanderpump Rules after show.

Scheana sits down with Lisa. She says that they had a good conversation and thinks they’re on the right track. Lisa says that he’s been on drugs for 8 years, so it’s not going to happen overnight. Lisa says how does she know he’s not lying? Scheana says because she’s giving him urine tests. Lisa says that’s not the foundation for a healthy marriage.

Next week, Kristen and James call it quits, and Kristen confronts Lala about James. Scheana continues to be delusional.

Watch What Happens Live – One on One with Vicki Gunvalson

Andy starts off with discussing City of Hope having issued a statement that they’d never treated Brooks. Vicki talks about how she actually met him there, supposedly after a chemo treatment, and they were all over the place. I gotta hand it to him. If this was a ruse, it was certainly a complicated one. Seriously.

Andy asks if she was vulnerable because her love tank was empty. She says she definitely had blinders on about a lot of things. She says he was so attentive, it was like she had a wife. He sounds like he was a decent boyfriend. It’s just all so bizarre.

They go through a lot of the medical stuff, how it didn’t make sense, and how Brooks had an answer for everything. She says that once the women started “circling,” she was arguing with him every night. She was obviously questioning the whole thing too, but what? Didn’t want it to blow up on TV? None of this makes me dislike Meghan any less though. I’ve said it before that I think the death of Vicki’s mother caused her to have a breakdown or a disconnect (word of the day) or whatever, and that the women’s approach to her was all wrong, especially Meghan, who she didn’t know from a hole in the ground.

Brooks did really show symptoms of being sick, and someone suggested to Vicki that he was ingesting eye drops (!) to get violently ill. Andy asks if she thinks he has cancer and she says no. Vicki says that she thinks because no one liked Brooks to begin with, he concocted this whole thing to get sympathy and be relatable. Again, my hat’s off to him for being so detailed and dedicated.

Andy says that the women, as well as many viewers, think she was in on it. I don’t. I think she was delusional and had the love blinders on, but I don’t think she was in on some kind of plot. Vicki makes individual public apologies to everyone. Vicki says she messed up by not believing the girls, but she wasn’t being malicious. She said she had to come to the truth in her own time. Andy reads a tweet (ugh!) from Gretchen, who is surprisingly sympathetic, especially since she lost her fiancé to cancer.

Vicki says if she had it to do over, she wouldn’t have divorced Don. She’s going to see him over Thanksgiving. Oddly enough the psychic who started the whole Brooks thing had said they would get back together. Vicki says that would be great from her end, but she doesn’t think Don has gotten over the hurt.

Andy asks if she’s afraid of Brooks. It doesn’t seem so, and really, there isn’t much he can do to her. Send mean tweets? Please.

Vicki talks about the position she was in. Her mother dying, Brooks having been diagnosed (as far as she knew), her family being far away, and being all alone filming a reality show. She said it was easier to fix what she had than to start over. Andy asks if she’s in denial over the severity of the situation. She says she hopes Brooks loved her, doubts he did, but she’s not in denial.

Vicki looks good. The whole thing is just sad, and I hope she’s able to move on. I think she is. It’s those others I’m concerned about.

Nov13

November 12, 2015 — GH, the OC & Brooks

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

General Hospital

Elizabeth comes downstairs to find Jason (I almost called him “Jake”) on the laptop. He tells her about visiting Sonny and says he was looking up bad stuff about himself online.

Sam is once again mooning over her old wedding ring. Patrick comes in and she drops it like it’s hot. She tells Patrick about giving Jason the motorcycle. Patrick says they need to tell Emma asap. Sam says that oddly enough, Emma had asked what would happen if Danny’s father came back, and she had said that was impossible. (Impossible earworm now.) Patrick notices she’s still wearing her engagement ring, so he’s hopeful that everything will work out. Good thing he didn’t catch her a few moments earlier.

Paul is all dapper and bouncy, telling Anna he’s glad she took the special investigator job. She says he didn’t give her much choice.

Jordon tells Dante she heard what happened at The Haunted Star.

Lulu and Dillon are getting jiggy with it.

Alexis shows up at Sam’s and asks how she’s holding up. Alexis says she can’t even imagine the emotional roller coaster Sam must be on, and Sam thanks her. I’m not sure why. Alexis tells her that the first thing they have to do is rescind the claim that Jason is dead, and then asks Sam if she wants to divorce Jason, since obviously she has to do that if she wants to marry Patrick.

Jason tells little Jake who he is. Jake is like, I knew it, because he did. I noticed he didn’t say anything to his mother about how she’d said it first. Monica is at the door. I’d forgotten that Jason is her son.

Paul tells Jordan about hiring Anna. She says that’s cool, but the timing is weird, since there’s not much in the way of organized crime going on right now. Unless there’s something Paul isn’t telling her. Yeah, like everything.

Dillon and Lulu are still getting it on, and I thought one of their phones was ringing, but it was really the background music being too loud. She stops things before they get totally nakey. She says she’s doing the same thing Dante did, and Dillon asks if she’s going to forgive Dante. Please don’t let it be this easy.

Dante tells Valerie (why is he even talking to her?) that he’s not sure how much space to give Lulu. If she sees them talking, he’s going to have to give her a whole lot of space. Like forever space. Valerie says to give Lulu a little time and she’ll come around. And blah-blah-blah about what a great guy he is.

Lulu tells Dillon they aren’t such great friends anymore, and he gets kind of offended. He insults Dante and deservedly so, but she says she still loves Dante, even though she wishes she didn’t.

Sam tells Alexis that she and Jason might be married, but he doesn’t remember and started a new life. When Alexis asks what she wants, Sam says to go back in time before Jason disappeared. Nobody asked me, but I’d like to go back to the 80s.

Monica says grandma stuff to Jake and Elizabeth takes him to school. Jason says he hopes Monica doesn’t expect him to call her mom. He says he doesn’t want one more person telling him what he was like or what he should feel. She says she has no intention of doing that, but if he wants any truths, to let her know. Monica says she learned to let go of the man he was and love the one he is now. She just wants a conversation about who he’s become. She asks for a hug and he gives her one. She invites him to the annual Thanksgiving pizza dinner. He promises to think about it and she promises that, per tradition, it will be a disaster. I love Thanksgiving at the Q’s! Waaah! I miss Alan, and Lila, and Edward.

Elizabeth whines to Patrick about how the man she was going to marry is married to his fiancé. Patrick has an astute moment, and says something about how Elizabeth acted like something might go wrong just before the wedding was supposed to happen. She says if he just keeps Sam away from Jason, everything will be okay.

Dante wishes Valerie the best of luck (really, that’s what he says) and they have an awkward hug.

Lulu apologizes to Dillon. This time, her phone really does ring and she says it’s a reminder that she has to be somewhere and dashes off. Paul arrives. Dillon apologizes for taking Paul’s half a million, but Paul is like, it’s cool, I’ll write it off. I wish Paul was my dad. Dillon says he’s pulling the plug on the film. Paul says he feels partially responsible for encouraging him go after what he wanted. Paul and Dillon do some exposition dialogue to catch people up who missed the last few episodes.

Jordan isn’t totally buying that Paul hired Anna to keep everything going well. Anna says she’s got too much time on her hands and just sits around thinking about Duke. Jordan tells Anna to keep an eye on Paul because she doesn’t quite trust him. Anna says she has every intention of doing that.

Elizabeth tells Patrick that Sam will want Jason back. He says, “Ouch!” and I agree. That was freakin’ rude, but no surprise since she is soooo self-centered. Patrick says to give him some credit.

Sam says she understands that she and Jason might have taken different paths, but it freaks her out that he remembers nothing of their life together. She said she always had the feeling he was alive, even when everyone told her to shut-up and move on. She’s says Spinelli felt it spiritually, but she felt it physically in her heart. She can’t believe Jason didn’t feel it too. And – no surprise – there he is at the door!

Patrick tells Elizabeth que sera sera, and if what they have is real, it will work out. Like Elizabeth is going to let things alone. Monica arrives at the hospital and tells Elizabeth that Jason told her he feels like he’s being pulled in all directions, and she needs to back off. Go, Monica!

Alexis “introduces” herself to Jason, and leaves. Sam calls Danny and if those two don’t say something about the Lucky Buddha (which I think is actually not the right name) vow renewal, I am going to go out of my mind.

Paul tells Dillon not to give up on his dreams. I wouldn’t have expected him to be so cliché.

Dante and Lulu both show up for the doctor’s appointment they had to prepare for the embryo transfer. Very awkward. The Nurse Practitioner (I don’t really know what she is, but that’s what I decided) says the doctor is in surgery and gives Lulu some prescriptions. She says, “So. Are you ready to make a baby?” and I almost lose it.

Lulu says they’ve decided not to move forward and please tell the doctor they’re canceling. The NP asks what they should do with the embryo and she says don’t do anything and runs out. Dante follows, and asks what her plans are. She asks what shade of lipstick Valerie wears since it’s on his collar. D’oh! Then she tells him she might want to give Rocco siblings one day, and she doesn’t need him to do it. Oh, snap! Quadruple snap.

Valerie gets a call that she’s going to be working with Dante. No way, no how, would that ever happen IRL.

Monica tells Elizabeth to give Jason some time to remember. Another unbelievable scenario.

Jason tells Sam he has questions. She says if she can help him, she will, whenever he’s ready. She says he’s welcome to see Danny any time, and since Danny really doesn’t know what’s going on, there’s no drama or pressure. They almost hug, but it’s too awkward, so they shake hands, which is even more awkward. Lots of awkward in this episode. He starts to leave and Sam asks him not to go.

The Real Housewives of the OC – Brooks Tells All & Secrets Revealed

We’ve already seen the main point – Brooks telling Meghan to f-off.  This is basically a one-on-one interview with Andy Cohen to follow up the whole does-he-or-does-he-not have cancer debacle this season. There isn’t a lot to say about the show, since we’ve pretty much heard it all. Brooks has admitted to throwing around false documents for the show’s sake, but still insists that he did/does have cancer. He is not, however, going to make anyone privy to his real medical records. While we haven’t heard great things about him, my jury is still out on this. He seems like a real schmuck, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t sick.

My main gripe with the whole thing though, is how Vicki was treated. Maybe she knew, maybe she didn’t, but I’m sure she believed him up to a point. Things changed though, when her mother died. Vicki was tremendously affected by this and no one took that into account or even seemed to care. Meghan actually said, like the insensitive, unempathetic brainless twit that she is, that a death doesn’t affect other areas of her life. I don’t wish ill on her, but one day she will be sorry for those words. Oh, unless she is really heartless and once someone dies, they’re out of sight out of mind for her.

My father raised me and passed away just before I got married. It’s been 30 years now, and it still affects me in some ways. Time doesn’t heal all wounds; it just makes them easier to live with. When this was fresh, it affected me greatly. It’s like your world stops and you wonder how everything else can still be going on. I could see the tremendous pain that Vicki was, and still is, in. Perhaps Brooks was someone she could cling to in that time, and she didn’t want to see that there was anything wrong. If her friends really loved her, they would have backed off for a minute. Instead, they were absolutely relentless in their quest to prove Brooks was a liar and hammer opinions and questions at her. Meghan really does seem like there’s something wrong with her thinking, and she didn’t know Vicki, so that (almost) makes sense. But I’m disappointed in the other ladies. They should know better. Shame on them. And I see they’re still bitching about it. I hope they come around, but regardless, I hope Vicki is able to pull herself out of this funk she’s in. I haven’t always liked her behavior, but I think she has a good heart, and I’m rooting for her.

On to some revealed secrets. I’m glad they stopped using the term “lost footage.” Did they expect me to think Andy dropped it behind his desk and then forgot about it? Don’t insult my intelligence. I feel stupid enough already just watching this stuff.

I like these shows, because they often save the best for last, and there will be scenes that have me wondering why they weren’t included in the regular season. It’s also the time we get to see the women getting along, just having fun

Tamra says she hasn’t had a potato in 10 years. Ha-ha! Shannon says a Michigan diet is potato, potato, potato. I say an Oklahoma diet is beef, beef, beef.

We get to see some more of Heather shopping for the house. It has 70 doors! She says her closet, which I’m sure is also a dressing room, needs a combination to get in to. Is it a panic room too? Terry must be freaking loaded. I don’t think it came from Heather’s TV movie income. I’m not criticizing, just making an observation.

There wasn’t much Meghan in this show. I’m wondering if she left a bad taste in fans’ mouths or if she just didn’t contribute anything except negativity. She was even excluded from the additional footage of the cancer argument, which I somewhat tuned out since I’ve had enough now.

I’m glad to see The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is coming back on December 1 (Giggy!), but it makes me think of how close Christmas is, and how unprepared I always am. Maybe I should get out the decorations tomorrow. Yeah, right.

Nov2

November 1, 2015 — A Giant Bear, a Backstory & Vicki in the Hot Seat

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

Once Upon A Time

Lance and Merida are imprisoned, and Merlin takes David, Hook and Belle to free them. Merida says Arthur took her wisps and she needs them to save her brothers. Merlin says that her brothers will have to wait, as they have more urgent business.

In Storybrooke (that I’ve been spelling wrong), Belle suggests that instead of wasting time finding Merlin, they should ask Rumpelstiltskin for help. Rumpel is in the woods mooning over his teacup. He smashes it to get something to cut his rope bonds. Dark Emma and Merida see that he’s gone. Dark Emma tells Merida to kill Belle in order to get Rumpel to fight for something. I’m not sure how that’s supposed to work, but okay.

In the parallel world, Merida bops Belle in the head to get her to help with some magic. Belle says that she could have just asked, and Merida says she’s a bop you in the head first and ask questions later kind of lass. They go to a cute witch’s cabin when the witch is out at the mall or something, and borrow the use of her cauldron. Merida sees her brothers. They are about to be executed because Merida won’t marry some guy.

In Storybrooke, Belle finds Rumpel hiding. He tells her that if it wasn’t for her, he wouldn’t even be alive. I’m not sure if he’s talking about the teacup or something else. He tells Belle that Dark Emma is after her because she wants Rumpel to defend her.

Wicked Witch, Zelena, has also been imprisoned, in a hospital by Regina. She’s reading What to Expect When You’re Expecting, because she is. A nurse brings her a tray with food. Zelena is hoping for onion rings, but the nurse says she’s only supposed to have locally grown produce and shows her a yummy plate of broccoli and carrots. She tells the nurse to take a hike. Dark Emma pops in and spirits Zelena away and gives her onion rings. Zelena asks what Dark Emma wants.  Emma wants her help in exchange for her freedom. Zelena says forget you and disappears poof! in a cloud of smoke. I don’t know if she took herself back to the hospital or somewhere else.

Belle tells Rumpel to forget about the stupid teacup, and that she’s always seen that he’s a hero underneath. They go to Mr. Gold’s (nee Rumpel’s) shop and Merida shows up. She says she couldn’t resist Emma and now Belle’s fate rests in Rumpel’s hands.

Parallel world Merida says her father taught her everything she knows and that if she remembers what she’s fighting for, she’ll never miss her target. She’s given Belle a recipe for a potion to change her (Merida) into a bear, so that she can fight the clan who has her brothers.

Storybrooke Arthur says he’ll help Regina get Merlin back, but he has to be alone with the magic mushroom to do it. (That’s what they all say.) The second he’s by himself, he throws it into the fire. I didn’t think he was really there to help. He tells them some story to cover up what he did.

Merida is about to shoot Belle with an arrow, and tells Rumpel to be the man they need. He says, sorry he can’t, and while Merida is taking aim, Belle pulls the rug out from under her. Literally.

Parallel Merida tells Belle that her father died because of her. She tried to protect him and missed the target. She says the clans lost faith in her. They didn’t believe she could rule alone and wanted her to marry. Belle gives her the bear potion.

Rumpel and Belle drive out of Storybrooke. Belle tells him running never made anyone a hero and makes him stop the car. He tells her about how he injured himself to avoid combat, that he’s a coward and it’s not going to change. She walks away back toward Storybrooke and runs right into Merida. Merida says Dark Emma isn’t taking chances and is making her drink the bear potion. She turns into a bear the size of the Empire State Building.

Just has the clans are celebrating their victory in capturing Merida’s brothers, Merida shows up and drinks the bear potion. Nothing happens and Belle tells her that she switched bottles because Merida needs to defend herself as their queen, otherwise they’ll never respect her. Just as arrows are let fly toward her brothers, Merida shoots her own arrows that stop theirs.  The clans are so impressed they kneel before their queen and release her brothers. She tells the dude who wanted to marry her that he’s lucky she knows the meaning of mercy.

The gigantic bear chases Belle through the woods. This thing is freaking massive and she tumbles down a cliff. Belle and the bear are face to face, and Rumpel shows up. Belle tells him to run, but he says he’s not running this time. The bear cracks him one and he goes flying. He tells the bear to do her worst, and then throws a bag of magic whatever in her mouth and the bear changes back to Merida. Belle asks how he knew it would work and he says he didn’t. Mushy stuff with Belle and Rumpel, while Merida lies there on the ground feeling like an idiot.

Merida thanks parallel Belle for helping her get her kingdom back, and Belle leaves to go to Rumpel.

Storeybrooke Merlin tells Emma that he’s always wanted to try a certain candy bar, and Emma remembers him being an usher in a movie theater where she saw The Sword in the Stone as a girl. He had told her that one day she’d be in a position to remove Excalibur, but he tells her now not to do it.

Rumpel wants to make a deal with Dark Emma. He says he’ll remove Excalibur if she gives Merida her heart back. After balking for 5 seconds, Dark Emma puts Merida’s heart back where it belongs. Rumpel tells Belle that if things don’t work out, he’s sorry for everything. He removes Excalibur and cuts off Dark Emma’s head. Just kidding. He says a deal’s a deal, and gives her the sword. He tells Dark Emma that she’s made a mistake in turning him into a hero. She says Storybrooke is loaded with heroes and none of them have been able to stop her. He says that’s because none of them are him.

David finds the burned mushroom and says they obviously can’t trust Arthur. Regina says Henry can help them since he’s the author of the story. Henry puts the mushroom into a bubbling cauldron, and Hologram Merlin rises out of it. He starts telling them something, but then says the dark one has found him and disappears.

The Walking Dead

We begin with Morgan talking to someone we don’t see. He says they’ve wanted everything from him and he’s going to give it to them. The word “Then” is shown and Morgan is in what looks like some kind of cell with a blackboard. He’s yelling at someone while a lantern on the floor looks like it’s going to burn the place down. This is a confusing episode start, but they like to do that.

Now Morgan is in the woods picking off some zombies. He puts them in a pile, covers them with dried leaves and sets them on fire. Way to start a forest fire. Where is Smokey the Bear when you need him? Oops! One of those zombies wasn’t quite dead and gives a whole new meaning to the term burning man festival. Satisfied with his day’s work, Morgan has a beer.

Two guys who are not zombies come running through the woods. Morgan gets one in the throat with a sharpened stick and strangles the other. He burns them too. I have no clue what’s going on here, except that Morgan is a firebug.

Morgan is talking to himself, saying, “You know what it is,” and does some clumsy ballet moves with the stick. He sees a house with a goat tied out front. He’s about to steal the goat when a voice tells him to leave the goat alone. The voice tells him to put the gun down and come inside for some falafel. I’m not even making that up. He comes closer to the cabin and the voice tells him it’s his last chance to put the gun down. When he doesn’t, he gets whacked in the head from behind by a guy who looks like Friar Tuck.

Morgan comes to in a cell. There’s a lot of that going around. The friar has changed into work clothes, and tells Morgan he should be more careful. Morgan yells “Kill me,” a couple of times. He tosses Morgan a book on The Art of Peace. The watch goat sounds an alarm and the guy runs out and intercepts a zombie. He gives Morgan some food.

The next day, he tells Morgan his name is Eastman and that he rehabilitated prisoners before the apocalypse. He asks Morgan what he does or did. Morgan says kill anyone who gets near him. Nice. When Eastman is out on his morning constitutional, Morgan works the zipper pull of his jacket and tries cutting around one of the window bars. When Eastman comes back in, he says he believes Morgan must be suffering from PTSD. Morgan tells him about killing the two guys. Eastman asks if Morgan has saved anyone. He says he saw a wedding ring, so Morgan must have had someone in his life. He supposes Morgan saw them get zombiefied. Morgan says he has to kill him because he was born to “clear,” whatever that means. Eastman says that he’s only met one truly evil person, that it’s usually some kind of trauma that causes people to do bad things. It turns out the cell door was open the whole time. I’m sure this is all very philosophical and Morgan wrecked his jacket for nothing. Eastman tells him he can go or stay, but he won’t allow Morgan to kill him. Morgan opens the cell door, acts like he’s leaving and then attacks Eastman with his stick.

Eastman gets the better of him, but then Morgan gets the better of Eastman. It reverses again, but in the end Eastman pins Morgan to the ground until he gets ahold of himself, like you would with a kid having a tantrum. Morgan asks Eastman to kill him again, which is getting old, but Eastman says he gave Morgan two choices and that wasn’t one of them. Morgan goes back to the cell and closes the door. Eastman opens it and Morgan kicks it shut again.

Later, Eastman tells him that it was aikido he was using to kick Morgan’s ass. He tells Morgan about how his daughter found him crying in the garage after work. She gave him her rabbit’s foot and told him it will make things better. He discovered aikido the next day. Eastman says they’re going on a trip. He has no idea where, but he doesn’t want to go by himself.

Eastman is also on a mission to learn how to make goat cheese. He tells Morgan he has a lot of supplies, but wants to scavenge some things for the trip. He asks Morgan to watch the goat while he’s gone. I swear, if Morgan touches that goat, I’ll kill him myself. He picks up the book and reads that the basic creed of aikido is to not kill, even if it’s the most evil person. He hears the goat making warning sounds and knocks off a couple of zombies.

I hope his attitude changes by the end of this episode, because he’s annoying the crap out of me. He finds a makeshift graveyard and is burying the zombies when Eastman comes back. Eastman thanks him for saving the goat and checks the zombies’ pockets for ID so that he can make grave markers. I am having such a bad feeling here that this is going to end in some depressing way.

Commercial break. The Talking Dead is having 2 surprise cast members tonight. That’s not good.

Eastman wants to teach Morgan aikido. He says you’re to care about the welfare of your opponent and that all life is precious, not just yours. Morgan gets aikido lessons and reads the book. At dinner, Morgan asks what’s up with the cell in his living room. Eastman tells him that back in the day, he interviewed prisoners up for parole and there was a guy who said and did all the right things, but he could see the guy was a psychopath. The prisoner discovered that he knew, dropped the facade and was going to kill Eastman because he knew Eastman would make sure he’d never get out of prison. I would say that’s not the best solution, but he got out anyway and killed Eastman’s family. (Here I would say this is pretty far-fetched, but I was friends with Richie Adan who was murdered by Jack Henry Abbott after Norman Mailer had helped him get released.) Eastman built the cell because he was going to put this guy in it, but he came to believe all life is precious.  I just know this episode is going to break my heart somehow.

Eastman asks Morgan who he lost and what were their names. Morgan wants to have a pity party, but Eastman says no, we’re doing some aikido instead. While they’re doing a drill, a zombie comes out of the woods. It’s one of the guys Morgan killed and Morgan becomes paralyzed. Eastman intervenes and gets bitten. My prediction was correct. Morgan is furious. Eastman says let’s go home, that Morgan “made it out,” and can’t go back. They fight with the aikido sticks and once again Morgan goes back to the “kill me” business.

Commercial break. An “episode” of Fear 462. One of the characters used to be on All My Children a really long time ago. So long, I don’t remember what her name is or her character’s name. Julie rings a bell, but I’m not positive.

This is just dismal now. Morgan is on a hunt for zombies in the woods. He kills one and there are two hikers that had been frozen in their tracks. The girl takes a can of beans and a bullet out of her bag, puts them down as an offering to Morgan and says, thank you. I’m glad he didn’t kill them.

Oh my heart. I can’t take this. Morgan comes home to find the goat being eaten by a zombie. Eastman is a beat behind him and says she must have figured out the door wasn’t locked and gotten out. I want to cry.

Eastman finishes the story about the prisoner. He did accomplish his mission and when the prisoner was eventually released, he kidnapped him. He put him in the cell and let him starve to death. It took 47 days. He says he was like Morgan was, but it gave him no peace. He found peace when he decided to never kill anything again. I guess this cabin is pretty remote, because when he went to turn himself in, he found out about the apocalypse.

Eastman isn’t looking too good. He says he’s ready to go and he has a gun locked away. He gives Morgan his rabbit’s foot and says he hopes it’s lucky for Morgan too. This whole thing is very painful and I’m glad they’re not showing the suicide. Morgan is truly alone once again.

Morgan leaves the cabin, walking past Eastman’s grave marker. He sees the sign and map for Terminus, smiles, and heads down the train tracks. And we all know how that ended up.

We’re back to now, and Morgan is with a Wolf that he’d abducted, to whom he’d been telling the story. The Wolf asks if Morgan thinks there’s hope for him and Morgan says yes. The Wolf shows Morgan that he has a bite mark. He says he knows he’s probably going die, that if he doesn’t, he’ll have to kill everyone there. All righty then.

Morgan leaves and locks the door. And I still don’t know what was going on with that fire in the beginning.

The Real Housewives of the OC – Reunion Part 3

I love Heather’s dress and earrings! We dive right into the Brooks thing, even showing an ancient clip with an ex-Housewife Laurie. Tamra tells some old story too. Shannon asks if Vicki thinks Brooks really has cancer and she says yes. Briana says early on, Brooks had said he had pancreatic cancer, but it was really pancreatitis.

They cut to a one-on-one interview by Andy with Brooks, who “couldn’t be there.” I’ll bet. I wouldn’t want to be there either with that bunch of women ganging up on me. He talks about the Newport Imaging PET scan. Brooks says that he went to Hogue for the test, but his oncologist practices at both places and the results were dictated at Newport.  Andy brings up the pancreatitis thing. He says he never talked to Briana directly about it, that it was Vicki who passed along the wrong info. Briana makes a bunch of faces in a little box in the corner of the screen.

Vicki says she doesn’t have proof if he has cancer or not and everyone yells at her for “protecting” Brooks. Shannon says she has proof. She took a screen shot of the report and compared it with a test she had taken there. She whips out a copy of one of their reports and gives us all kinds of information about how they do stuff there. She says the mess that his report was isn’t even comparable. Vicki heaves a huge sigh. Back at the Brooks interview, Andy points out the inconsistencies between what Vicki and Brooks have said. Brooks says she misspeaks quite a bit. Andy asks if he has anything to say to Meghan, and he says F-off. Now tell us how you really feel. Andy asks why he doesn’t show Heather’s husband Terry the report, and he says he wishes he had and that he will. Heather says it hasn’t happened yet. Vicki admits to fabricating a story about Terry’s involvement because she wanted people to have compassion. The women go nuts on her and at least Andy comes to her defense for telling the truth.

Andy says Meghan went to great lengths to disprove Brooks’s cancer. Meghan starts crying about the dinner party where Vicki went off on her and her husband’s ex-wife just dying from cancer. Vicki says she still believes Brooks has cancer and she had even gone to chemo with him once. Heather says Vicki is too smart for this and Tamra asks what does Brooks have on her to make her lie? Andy asks if Vicki is scared of Brooks and she kind of nods. She says he was more verbally abusive. Briana says that she’s seem him be physically abusive. She says she saw Brooks shake Vicki and it was in front of a room full of people, so what does he do behind closed doors? I’m wondering why nobody in that room full of people, including Briana, say something?

Vicki says that no one seemed to care when Brooks was diagnosed, and Shannon gets pretty upset. We flash back to just about every interaction with Shannon and Vicki last season. We also see the bit where Tamra said Vicki might be going to hell for lying. All the women agree. I wonder where on earth the Christians in the bunch get this stuff, and consider writing to Tamra’s “pasture” again.

Shannon goes nuts, talking about how she was loyal to Vicki. Vicki talks about her mother passing away and Meghan idiotically says that shouldn’t affect the other areas of her life. Vicki admits that her gut reaction is that Brooks doesn’t have cancer. Andy says Vicki seems disconnected and outs Vicki for taking some Xanax. Geez, nothing is sacred. She says nobody wants to feel duped, and she feels sad, but relieved to not be with him any longer. However, she sticks with the fact that she never had definitive proof that he does or doesn’t have cancer. Briana talks about how she’s been back home and has her old room back. There’s something about her that I just don’t like. Maybe it’s that she claims to be so independent, yet I get the feeling she’s very dependent.They take a break and Tamra, Briana and Vicki discuss the whole thing. Tamra says she’s heartbroken and wants the old Vicki back.

I think my problem with this bunch is, although they might be coming from a good place (I’m not so sure about Meghan – I think that one has a screw loose), they’re loud and relentless. They never once gave Vicki a break when her mother had just passed away. And yes, Meghan, something like that can affect other areas of your life. It was like they were torturing this poor woman instead of helping the situation. Honestly, sometimes they come off like they’ve had no life experience whatsoever, and certainly can’t seem to walk in anyone else’s shoes.

Awww, it’s our final moments of the reunion. Andy asks Meghan how her experience was, and I don’t care. He points out that Vicki copped to her culpability in the Brooks business, but says it wasn’t enough to satisfy the other wives. Shannon says blah-blah-blah about her marriage and that she’s disappointed in her friendship with Vicki. Tamra gets all choked up about being grateful and says she hopes her friendship with Vicki can be mended. Vicki says she’s not in a good place, that she’s sad, but she also feels refreshed.

Andy passes out fireball shots and I wish I’d had several while watching this.

Oct27

October 26, 2015 — GH, the OC Reunites & Ladies Go To Denmark

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

Diane! I’ve missed her! It should be interesting too, since she’s going to be Spinelli’s attorney. I can’t believe they have him handcuffed to a chair in the police station though. Not too much overkill. Are they afraid he might break out an iPhone or something?

Sabrrrina and Michael tell Sonny that they’re having a baby. Sonny says fatherhood changed his life. Apparently, not enough to get him to change careers. They discuss whether they want to know the gender of the baby before it’s born, and I have this vision of a sonogram picture and the baby has Carrrlos’s face. Sabrrrina and Carly leave the room, and Sonny tells Michael he has to make an honest woman of Sabrrrina. I guess she doesn’t get a say in that.

Dante says he wants to leave the police force if he and Lulu are going to have another child. Their doctor says not all embryos are viable after thawing, so they should slow their enthusiasm roll.

Jordan is telling Diane about how Spinelli could be facing federal charges. She says he can meet with Diane after he’s processed. Diana asks Sam what Spinelli was looking for when they’re alone.

“Jake” is arguing with young Jake about what his father position is. Jake keeps insisting that “Jake” is his real father. When “Jake” goes to the kitchen, Elizabeth tells young Jake that when they get married, “Jake” will be his step-dad, but he says that’s not what she told Laura. Take that, Elizabeth. With the worst timing ever, “Jake” returns with a plate of cookies and some milk. Is milk still considered good for kids? I thought there was some argument about that. Cow’s milk anyway.

Sam tells Diane that she knows what it is not to have family to lean on, and that’s why she wants to help “Jake.” Diane notices her engagement ring and asks if Sam thinks it’s a good idea. Hmm… Is Patrick still legally married to Robin? Nope, that’s not what Diane is thinking anyway. She says she had a front row seat for Sam’s relationship with Jason, and that she thinks Sam loves the excitement and Patrick is about the most boring guy on earth.

Elizabeth tells “Jake” that young Jake’s perception has been skewed, and that he needs to see a therapist. Jake calls Sam and she says she’ll meet him at the docks.

The doctor tells Dante and Lulu that with only one embryo, they only have a 16% chance of success, and if that part is successful, they’ll have a one in five chance of getting a baby out of it.

Carly tells Sabrrrina she should take her time with things. Not if Sonny has anything to say about it. He’s probably making up wedding favors in his hospital bed. Sonny tells Carly that he told Michael he should marry Sabrrrina, and she says, “No. Hell no,” which is my usual reaction whenever I see Michael. Carly insists that Michael doesn’t love Sabrrrina and I have no idea where this is coming from. She claims she can tell that neither one of them love each other. She says they were only consoling each other and it’s no basis for a marriage. Thank goodness they both have Carly to tell them how they really feel.

Dante Is having second thoughts about Lulu getting pregnant. He’s afraid it will be a long, hard road for her and it might not result in a baby and she’ll feel like she failed. Maybe he should get together with Carly, and they can tell everyone how they’re supposed to be feeling.

Diane meets with The Jackal. Diane tells Jordan that she should be getting a call from Judge Cole soon. As soon as Jordan leaves, Diane lambasts Spinelli. Not for what he did, but for getting caught. I love her and wish she could be my lawyer if I ever need one.

Elizabeth tells young Jake that “it’s complicated.” That’s mom code for I’m not telling you anything.

“Jake” apologizes to Sam for his outburst after finding out about the deleted file. Jake tells Sam that Elizabeth had told him to make like Elsa and let it go, but he doesn’t want to do that because of what young Jake said. It’s not because he believes what Jake said, but that Jake is invested in him now and he doesn’t want something from his past to come along later to screw that up. He seems like a smart guy, so why can’t he put 2 and 2 together? He seems very aware that he knew what he was doing when he killed some guys, and he wants to make sure Elizabeth and her boys are safe around him. Sam tells him they “hit a little snag,” and lets him know about Spinelli’s arrest. She still believes that when Spinelli gets sprung, he can finish the quest.

Lulu wants to try the in vitro anyway, and says that if it doesn’t work out, she’ll be happy the way things are. She wants the chance of them to create a life together. Man, if Valerie turns out pregnant, there is going to be one load of grief.

Carly tells Sonny that Michael should have passion in his relationship. I guess she’s been in the bedroom with them too. She says Sabrrrina is fine for Michael to date, but not marry. Huh?

Sabrrrina (who IRL must be at least 5 months along, considering what she’s wearing) is impressed with how well Michael took the news. We’ll see how he feels when the baby comes out speaking Spanish. He says that he wants the three of them (meaning him, Sabrrrina and the baby) to be a family, and asks her to marry him. She says he’s great and all, but that would be a no.

Lulu tells Dante that no one ever got what they wanted by being afraid to try. They agree to start the procedure the day after Halloween.

Jordan tells Spinelli that he’s free to go, but there had better not be a next time. She says if she catches him messing around with the hospital records again, that even his well-connected attorney won’t be able to help him. Diana tells him his skills aren’t what they once were, and he should stay away from hacking.

Elizabeth says blah-blah-blah to young Jake and that “Jake’s” past doesn’t matter.

“Jake” thinks differently though, and wants to make sure he hasn’t committed any crimes he doesn’t know about. Sam is up for the challenge, but she believes that if he wasn’t a good guy to begin with, he wouldn’t be as concerned as he is. She says that by the time he marries Elizabeth, he’ll know who he is.

Does that mean we’ll know by November 6?

The Real Housewives of the OC – Reunion Part 2

We revisit some weird stuff like Heather’s foray into leech territory and Shannon’s colonic mishap. Then we discuss Heather’s massive house. Heather also says she has frozen embryos, but I’m not sure where they’re being stored. That house is so big, they could have a lab in the basement for all I know. Heather says she’s 87 now (ha-ha, Heather – you would be saying that if you didn’t look so good at 46), so she won’t be using them and Andy offers to buy them. Hey, Lulu and Dante could use a spare egg.

Ugh! It’s Meghan’s husband Jim, joining them on the couch. It is funny though, that people are starting to recognize him as Meghan’s husband instead of a famous ballplayer. We go back to some of the nastier moments when Meghan behaved like twit and Jim behaved like a tool. Andy points out that he often treats Meghan like a child, and they both say she doesn’t let him get away with that. Okay. I believe it if you believe it. He says he wasn’t ready for the bright lights of reality TV, and that’s why he acts so condescending. He makes more excuses and my hearing turns off. Heather says “Jimmy is the coolest guy ever.” I doubt it.

Vicki says that she misunderstood what Brooks had told her when she said Jim had told Brooks that two months out of four had been “challenging,” when he’d actually said it was a couple of situations. Two is two to Vicki. Meghan climbs onto her high horse and declares Vicki a liar. This leads to a flashback of an offhand comment Vicki made at Tamra’s “sex party.” Tamra was dressed entirely in black lace, gyrating around  with a…device strapped onto her, when Vicki told Heather that Tamra’s kids weren’t going to like it and she’s already had one taken away. Yep, that was kind of mean, except I do think she might have a point without even knowing it. Tamra seems like a good mother, but the daughter is not happy about her airing information about them on TV. We move to Vicki saying that Jim and Meghan’s marriage wouldn’t last 5 years. I still think so.

Meghan signed a pre-nup and claims it was her idea. It was out of the goodness of her heart, so that the children would never feel that something can be taken away from them, and it would ease Jim’s mind about her intentions. I don’t know if I believe that, but he says her family was all on board with it too. He probably paid them off.

On to David’s affair. God bless these two for being able to move past it, and being able to move past it on television. I didn’t like David very much at first, but now I understand what was going on, and why he was so irritated and distant. When they were on Watch What Happens Live, he was criticized by some viewers for being “emotionless” and “wooden.” Hello? He’s not an actor. I’d like to see them have cameras up their ass 24/7 and act even halfway normal. When Andy asks Shannon if she has any insight into why he had the affair, she starts saying that he was unavailable because of work and she was being a nag thinking she could get what she wanted that way. All of the ladies start freaking, telling her not to make excuses for him. Heather says you fix it or leave, you don’t cheat, and on this I agree.

We get one of those short bits in between commercials where Andy questions Vicki’s perception of what a mammal is, since she thought a shark was one. That’s not too far-fetched though, since they don’t lay eggs, but give birth. That isn’t always the criteria though. Our mammalogy lesson for today.

Shannon says she’s not making excuses for David, that she blames him plenty. Heather tells us about how she was at a lunch and the topic came up. She tried to squash it, but she caught one of the other women texting the mistress. Andy reads a viewer text that asks if Shannon thinks it was a good idea for the kids to see what happened on TV. She said the kids had already known. Not that she told them, but they’d seen something on his phone, and if they hadn’t, she wouldn’t have put it out there. She says though, that since it did happen, it’s good for the kids to see that it’s possible to put things back together. And they seem well-adjusted to me. Andy makes a joke like he’s going to bring the mistress out. Ha-ha-ha, Andy! I’ve said it before, he has replaced Jeff Probst as the reality TV antichrist.

Another ugh! Briana joins the group. Not only do I not like her, she always looks like a slob. Is she wearing black eye shadow? Does she think this is The Rocky Horror Picture Show? And why can’t she ever comb her hair? As we already know, Vicki and Brooks aren’t together anymore. Brooks technically broke up with her, but she says the main reason was the conflict with Briana. Briana says he would do terrible things when Vicki was on the other side of the room. For example, he hit on her while she was pregnant. The only thing I can think is he must have been drunk as a skunk. I do actually have some experience in that vein. When I got married my (now ex) brother-in-law hit on every girl at the reception, including the bride.

Meghan says Brooks’s lawyer had contacted her, telling her to leave him alone. At this point, I don’t care if Brooks is an ax murderer, I still like him more than Meghan. We get a clip of Andy’s interview with Brooks, who says Briana seems to be the only relative that has a problem with him. He says that Briana was leaning on Vicki for financial help and Briana goes apesh*t. She says she makes 6 figures and doesn’t need help. Please tell me why Vicki did things like buy her a car this season if she makes so much money? She then gives a laundry list of all the bad stuff Brooks has done and says the whole family hates him.

Part 3 looks like a doozie! I do feel sorry for Vicki though. Nobody’s ever given her a moment to breathe and I can identify with that.

VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION: Part 3 of The Real Housewives of the OC’s reunion is going to be on Sunday night – not Monday. Thanks Bravo! I live for this stuff and now you have to create conflict.

Ladies of London

More great pop music! Geez, maybe Caroline #1 should sell off a few of her purses and get some money to keep the business going. I think she has about 5000 of them. And I’m pretty sure they’re more expensive than mine.

London Fashion Week is starting with a “Fashion for Relief” show that benefits Ebola. That makes it sound like it’s promoting Ebola, but you know what I mean. It seems to be a problem over there. It’s not the first time it’s been mentioned. Annabelle is on the runway. We flash back to her riding accident, and I have to give her props. She had a broken pelvis, among other injuries, and you would never know it. She’s working the runway like a boss and wearing an amazing black gown.

It looks like Caroline #1’s business is tanking. She says her several million pounds investment ran out 6 months before she thought it would. Seven years down the drain. She says there’s no shame in failure (didn’t someone say it’s a lesson in what not to do?), but she’s incredibly sad.

Naomi Campbell is visiting with Annabelle. They’ve known each other for a while. The funny part is how Annabelle says Naomi is such a great friend because she doesn’t create drama. I choke on my Cup O’Noodles.

Marissa (bleh) is meeting The Baroness (Caroline #2)for tea. The Baroness says she hasn’t slept in days and looks like it. Even though she says she never wanted to talk about it again, The Baroness brings up the crappy thing that Marissa did by talking smack about The Baroness’s boyfriend to her sister. She wants a promise from Marissa that it won’t happen again. Marissa says that she can only apologize so many times, but in her individual interview, The Baroness says she doesn’t feel it’s been sincere. I can totally understand this. I don’t think Marissa grasps that what she did was actually a big deal.

Julie is doing a body-painted shot, an ad campaign for her JUGS. No not those kind. It’s Julia’s Unbelievable Balls. No not those kind. They’re similar to energy bars. She does a shot where the back of her is painted and she’s up against a painting where she’s the middle panel. Her body is freakin’ fabulous, although she’s nervous about the whole thing.

Joan Collins Sophie, The Baroness and Caroline #1 are having lunch. Caroline #1 wonders what she’s going to do on Monday now. The Baroness says she’ll rise like a phoenix and invites everyone to her family home in Denmark for a holiday. Ivana Trump Sophie says there will probably be drama because the American girls are not as tough as the British ones. Like these British girls don’t stir the pot.

One look at Caroline #1’s closet makes me wonder if she really had to close the business. Her closet is about as big as my house and it’s not empty. I seriously doubt it’s filled with items from K-Mart either. The girls are all getting ready for the Denmark trip. Everyone is wearing either black or navy blue. Annabelle is late, but manages to make it in time. And she’s wearing a while coat. Congrats on bucking the system!

They’re flying economy class and I have no clue why. Maybe it’s a novelty for them. I can assure you that if I could afford first class, there would be no going back. In Denmark, The Baroness is very famous, so there’s a photographer at the airport. She says once the news gets out, they probably won’t be left alone. Mo’ money, mo’ paparazzi.

Back in the old days, The Baroness’s family did the king of Denmark a favor, and since he didn’t have enough gold for a reward, he gave them several castles. Nice. For some reason, Annabelle thinks it’s “rude and childish” of Julie to want to go to a coffee shop while the others shop at a furrier. I don’t get it. I also don’t get why she even cares, since she had nothing to do with the trip. Julie is a vegan, so it should be no surprise that she doesn’t want to buy a fur. Alexis Carrington Sophie says the coat she’s picked is 69,000 Euros, but I have no idea how much that really is. Judging by Juliet’s reaction, I assume it’s a lot.

Annabelle tells Julie that she’s annoyed with chatter behind the scenes. I’m not sure what’s up with her, but she seems kind of unreasonable right now. The Baroness wants them to get everything out in the open at dinner. Good luck with that not turning into a screaming match. They all go to some fancy restaurant called Geist. It’s really beautiful and reminds me of some restaurants in Manhattan. The Baroness tells an amusing story about how the restaurant went out of their way for her, getting a dish they didn’t have from somewhere else, and Marissa acts incredibly rude in her individual interview by making snoring noises. This is the second time she’s done this in regard to The Baroness.

Uh-oh. The Baroness makes an announcement that if anyone has anything to say, say it now. Juliet says that she’s very happy because she’s learned her lesson about creating drama. Oh good. Annabelle is going to say a couple of things. Maybe now we’ll find out who put that stick up her ass. She says Juliet should listen more instead of going directly to drama. Nice after what Juiet just said. She tells Caroline #1 to basically quit being so rude. Julie gets bestowed with the information that she should hold some things in rather than letting them fly. Caroline #1 counters with that sometimes Annabelle seems absent, and that she comes in with “a face,” rather than letting everyone know what’s up. That’s it? What about the others?

Next week, we go to the castle, there’s another dinner where everyone gets a lecture, and Annabelle gets an ominous phone call.

Oct20

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

General Hospital

Hey! It’s Ned! He’s been off touring with his daughter, Brooklyn. Yo! Eddie Maine! When Alexis says something about “Olivia and Leo,” Ned says Leo is the baby that passed away and Mateo is the adopted baby. Alexis asks him if he was there for the adoption, and he says he was aware of everything, so I’m thinking he knows the truth. It’s like when you say you “have experience” with something on a resume and what you really mean is you walked past it once. Alexis is definitely suspicious, and when she leaves, calls somewhere regarding a DNA test. That lab makes a lot of money from Port Charles residents.

If Sabrrrina doesn’t stop “thinking about” Carrrlos, everyone is going to get a clue. She tells Michael she’s pregnant and when he starts singing “You’re Having My Baby,” she gives a soap opera face. Okay, I’m making up the singing part, but he did say it and she did make a face. And she stared at the picture of Carrrlos on the front page of the paper. He asks why she waited so long to tell him, and she says it was fear of losing another baby. This might actually be believable, if she’d lost baby Gabriel from a miscarriage, but it was a car accident. But that’s okay, no one has noticed this.

Kiki is still busy drinking. Morgan questions her drinking alone, and she says it’s better company. Hear, hear!

Whiney voice, I mean, Molly, isn’t happy about Julian moving in. Julian says she’s entitled to her opinion, but he’s entitled to try and change it. She’s like, good luck with that. She seems to think that whatever phone call he was on when she came in has something to do with a kidnapping. She tells Alexis that the next time Julian gets a mysterious phone call, that she should dig a hole and stick her head in it. She storms out while Alexis looks all shocked at the remark. Really? It’s not like Whiney Molly hasn’t been outspoken before. At least Julian has his shirt on today.

Spinelli tells Sam that Jason is still with them, just not in the conventional way. Boy, he has no idea how close he is to the truth. She says she sees Jason in Danny, and is feeling guilty for moving on. “Jake” goes to Windermere to shake Nicholas down about who he really is. Hayden steps in to stop him from strangling Nicholas. Nicholas tells him his life is better without knowing, and he did the DNA test to protect the innocent. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! That’s a good one! He accuses “Jake” of stealing his files and says he must have had help from Sam.”Jake” says to go ahead and press charges, but good luck getting them to stick. Nicholas admits comparing his DNA to an international database, but says there was no result. Like any of us believe that.

A strange (meaning a stranger, not weird) girl approaches Morgan. She says she noticed he got shot down by Kiki, but in lieu of that, he can flirt with her. She introduces herself as Darby Collette, which sounds like a romance writer pseudonym.

Ned goes to see Olivia and tells her he’s been doing a lot of thinking (never a good sign), and that he believes they should go their separate ways. Both Olivia and I make a sad face because Ned has aged really well. Ned says he can’t go along with the charade about Leo. He says that one lie leads to another until instead of living your life, you’re living a lie. Good one. As I’ve mentioned, I’m in this for the action stuff, not the couples, but even I feel badly about this. Ned doesn’t want to break up, but he tells her she has to tell Julian the truth.

It’s the anniversary of Jason’s loss, and Spinelli thinks they should do something special. Sam says Jason never liked a big deal about anything and suggest they just stand there as friends and meditate on the stars. A shooting star goes by and voila! here comes “Jake” to join them. Honestly, this is killing me.

Ned says he wants to stay with Olivia and be a family with Leo, but not under false pretenses. Olivia says she was going to tell Julian the truth, but Julian got arrested before she could say anything. The charges were dropped, but she doesn’t believe he’s out of the mob. Ned tells her good-by, and says that if she needs him for anything, just call.

Darby invites Morgan to a party, and Molly comes by, having used her fake ID to get in the bar. Darby knows Molly from school, and invites her along too. Morgan is on the fence about going, and Darby prods Molly for info on him when he steps away from the table.

Michael tells Sabrrrina that he loves her and wants the baby. He asks her what she wants, and she makes another soap opera face. No one asked me what I want, but I’d like Carrrlos back. Sabrrrina says she loves Michael too. What’s going to happen when that baby comes out with a beard and moustache?

Spinelli leaves Sam and “Jake” on the docks. “Jake” clues Sam in on what happened with Nicholas. He says that Nicholas will probably be running around, tying up loose ends, and that’s when he might slip up.

Nicholas asks Hayden if it might have occurred to her that he’s telling the truth about not knowing “Jake’s” identity, and she laughs her head off. Me too. Young Spencer comes in and it’s time for Hayden to toddle off so he and Nicholas can have a scene together. Spencer asks Nicholas what his intentions are toward Hayden. I love this kid and think he has a huge future in show biz. Spencer says he doesn’t want to like Hayden too much because he doesn’t want things to end up like they did with Britt. Nicholas says he feels the same way, and Spencer asks who he’s kidding, he’s in love with Hayden.

Morgan hassles Kiki some more. She tells him he hurts her just be being around and to leave her alone. She’s not even being that loud, but everyone in the bar seems to be listening in.

The most boring couple in the world, Alexis and Julian, discuss Molly, and I fall asleep.  Oddly enough, Julian gets another mystery call, but instead of taking Molly’s advice, Alexis listens from the hallway. He ends the call with saying if anything goes wrong, they’ll be consequences.

Kiki is done drinking, but has forgotten her wallet. The bartender, who has taken her car keys, tells her to walk home, which is highly unlikely, since he could be held responsible if anything happens. Why isn’t he just calling her a cab (you’re a cab!) and letting her deal with it from there?

Spencer says he sees the mating dance, the smolder and the skip in Nicholas’s step. ROFL! Nicholas steers him to bed.

We end with “Jake” and Sam parting company, while we see another shooting star. Come on already.

The Real Housewives of the OC – Reunion Part One

We start off behind-the-scenes with Meghan saying that she doesn’t know what to expect, and “I’ll just go out and be myself, I guess.” No, Meghan. Go out and be Fred Flintstone. I’d actually prefer Fred.

The ladies (and I use the term loosely) are dressed surprisingly understated. No ball gowns or ballerina outfits, although Shannon has an amazing pair of earrings that I desperately want.

Sadly, Jim’s ex-wife passed away, but on the upside, Hayley actually managed to graduate high school.

Meghan starts off picking on Vicki, because she’s of the opinion that the love for one’s own child is different than that toward a step-child.

I’m shocked when Heather, who is friends with another ex-wife of Jim’s, says that Meghan shouldn’t have criticized the ex on the show because she couldn’t answer for herself.  I agree. I also agree with her that being a stay-at-home mom is sometimes a harder job than working outside the home, and if you do, why can’t you have a nice purse. This was brought up because of Vicki’s comment about a stay-at-home wife spending the husband’s money.

We go down Memory Lane with Vicki and her mom. When Vicki’s mom died, that was one episode I could not watch a second time. My father passed away just before I got married, and I can so identify with how she feels. She says she feels like she doesn’t have anyone “watching out for” her now and I totally understand. She talks about how she still sometimes wants to pick up the phone when something happens and I get that too. When I went to my 20th high school reunion, I found out a childhood friend of mine had died, and my first thought was to call my father, and then I realized he was no longer here. Even after 30 years, it’s a feeling that’s hard to shake. Vicki tells a funny story about her mom getting arrested and it lightens the mood.

Commercial break. Oh, good! The Girlfriend’s Guide to Divorce is coming back for another season. Great show! I also love Odd Mom Out and hope it returns. I was surprised I liked the latter, because I thought I wouldn’t be able to relate, but it’s funny as hell, and more about being a New Yorker than anything else.

They have a funny segment about how particular the women are when they order food in a restaurant. Heather tells Shannon that she’s doing too many colonics. This, coming from the person who duct taped leeches to their stomach. Vicki also got some criticism for telling the naked sushi girl that she should get a real job. In all fairness, she also got a lot of resumes.

Meghan can’t cook Minute Rice? Really? She also doesn’t know who Heather Locklear is. One of the things that’s really bothered me about her is that she’s an ageist. I can’t count the times she’s referenced the ages of the other women in comparison to her 30 years on the earth. When I was in my 30s, one of my closest friends was in her 80s.

Tamra says that she and Meghan “speak the truth,” and I throw up in my mouth.  Andy asks Meghan what “judgy eyes” look like and she makes a cartoon face. I guess they look like Mr. Magoo when he puts on his glasses.

We flash back to Tamra telling us she’s been saved, “and if you don’t like it, you can suck it.” Why? Why does she always have to be so profane? Now, I’m no prude by any stretch of the imagination, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think some things are inappropriate. For instance, I was raised by a sailor and can certainly curse like one, but I don’t do that in front of someone’s aging parents. It was like when Tamra called Alexis “Jesus Jugs.” I was just like WTF? It made me cringe.

Tamra has had a lot of difficulties with her eldest daughter and there have been a lot of conflicts. Apparently, this child needs therapy, and her ex, who fought and won custody, didn’t think it was necessary. The court said because she was 17, she could make the decision of who she wants to live with. After a wonderful vacation together, where afterward her daughter texted “I love you” to her, Tamra’s daughter exited her life and hasn’t returned. Simon, her ex, is a controlling bastard, so it’s not surprising that he would use a child’s health to get back at Tamra. The kids also read the tabloid stuff, which has been less than kind to her. While I don’t think she’s the soul of tact, I don’t think she’s a bad mother and it’s unfortunate that she’s had to go through this. The upside is, it led her to the Lord, and I’m hoping she continues to grow.

Yep, we see the Alexis clip. Alexis sends an email to Andy to pass along to Tamra. Whoa. She totally calls Tamra out. I might have been a little more diplomatic, but she’s right on the money. She says that just because Jesus takes us as we are and we continue to make mistakes, it doesn’t give Tamra a hall pass to act like the same old bitch. I translated that last part. Tamra says Alexis is the kind of Christian that gives Christians a bad name, and that she shouldn’t be sitting in judgment. While I agree with the latter, isn’t Tamra doing the same thing with that statement? And sorry, Tamra is more likely to give Christians a bad name.

The previews show them talking about Brooks. I didn’t think we were going to get any of that tonight.

Ladies of London

They always have great music on this show. I love foreign pop!

Julie says she’s creating a new mold for being a Lady. Alexis Carrington Sophie says British aristocracy is a “civilized pursuit” (what?) and you need to dress the part.

The Baroness has gotten a humongous bouquet from her boyfriend, and I wonder if we’ll ever get to see him. Oooh. The card says “you kiss my soul.” Do you think he made that up himself? There’s more mushy stuff, but that was the best part. Caroline #1 has come by for a visit.

Marissa is telling her husband about the crater-sized faux pas she made at bowling, giving the Baroness a shirt that said “cougar” on it, and proceeding to make some really disgusting comments about dating children. The Baroness was not too happy about it, and the boyfriend pushed Marissa out of the taxi and left her in the street when she was supposed to get a ride home with them. I laugh so hard, I think I’ll bust a gut. Why didn’t Bravo film this???!

Annabelle says that it’s ironic that Julie is a yoga teacher and she’s always in a panic. The group is going on a shooting weekend, an aristocratic and expensive thing to do. The weekend part looks great, but you can leave me out of the shooting. Juliet is hosting it, which is kind of weird. Isn’t she a vegetarian? Marissa is a babbling idiot at dinner. Ha-ha! Juliet doesn’t have to do a thing to get back at her. Just let her be her stupid self. They get on the topic of is cougar a bad thing, and have to explain what MILF means to Julie like she’s a two-year-old. Caroline #1 is on edge because of her business going down the tubes. Everyone is meeting at 8 a.m., but she’s booked a spa day. I’d go with her.

There are elaborate outfits to shoot in. There are a lot of layers and it looks like it’s pretty chilly out. They’re shooting pheasants and partridges (♫ Come on, get happy! ♫), and the meat gets sold to pubs and given to the local people. I would never want to hunt, but I’m okay with others doing it if it gets eaten.

Oh, it’s Julie that’s the vegetarian. Why do their names have to be so similar, and why do we have 2 Carolines? Juliet says Marissa wants to be Victoria Beckham. Not bloody likely. Ever. Yay! It’s time to go to the pub.

Joan Collins Sophie says a shot of vodka in your soup can get you through the day or something like that. She also says that on these shooting weekends, they basically drink their faces off.

Julie and Marissa are having champagne and a bubble bath together. I don’t really like bubble baths much to begin with, but this is really weird IMO. The other girls have gone to the bar to have champagne. Everyone reconvenes for dinner. Caroline #1 needs to eat immediately, and I understand this. My husband has learned to understand that if we’re in the car and I say I need to eat now, I mean now, not 30 minutes from now. Oooh. The Baroness says Marissa makes her insides crawl. Me too! Caroline #1 tells Marissa that even if she apologized, she also blabbed to everyone within hearing distance about the cab thing, and it got back to the Baroness’s family. Marissa is also best friends with the Baroness’s sister.

Commercial break. Why is Samuel L. Jackson stumping for Capital One? He can’t possibly need the money.

Caroline #1 has to explain things to Marissa. Marissa hunts down the Baroness in the bathroom. The Baroness says she tried to climb out the window, but it was locked. Marissa is so freaking dense. She says she didn’t tell the whole world. Doesn’t matter. She told the wrong person. She has no business discussing the Baroness’s boyfriend with anyone. The Baroness says that her boyfriend did not “push” her out of the car, that she was dawdling, so they took off. I tend to believe her. The Baroness has had enough though, and accepts Marissa’s apology. Too bad. I liked the Evil Baroness, staring daggers at Marissa. The girls come back in with their arms around each other and everyone applauds. More dinking and parlor games.

This includes funneling some tequila into Juliet’s mouth. Yuk!

Next week, it’s London Fashion Week!

Oct13

October 12, 2015 — From PC to the OC to the UK

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

General Hospital

Dillon lays a kiss on Lulu, but she’s not having it. Nicholas lays a kiss on Hayden and she’s totally having it, and more, but just as they’re getting into it, she says she remembers something. Unless she’s remembering how good he is in bed, this might not go well.  Love Hayden’s highlights! So much better than the way too light ones she had as Greenlee on AMC that made her look like she had grey hair.

Sam and “Jake” are still teetering outside the window, but they’ve moved to a balcony. Hayden thinks Nicholas might have been threatening her in the memory that’s coming through. Nicholas says that yes, he was upset with her at some point and was going to throw her off the island (Island location confirmed! Now just tell me how they get there so fast.), but they “got past it” as they always did. Apparently getting past it means getting busy, which they’re just about to do, when the two stooges outside make some noise.

Dillon says he’s trying to protect Lulu from what Dante did with Valerie, but stops short of telling her everything. Speaking of which, how many people know about that? It seems like wherever Valerie goes, she’s discussing it with someone. Now she’s talking to Jordan about it.

Morgan is playing pool at The Floating Rib (which seems to be getting a lot of play these days), when Ava drops by. As usual, he’s acting like a jerk. Ava wants Avery to know her siblings and asks Morgan to put a lid on his animosity.

Nina wants to redecorate and Kiki gets weird about that, saying Nina is erasing all the memories of Silas. Maybe she shouldn’t live with them or keep her opinions to herself. Who wants to move into a dead guy’s place and not redecorate? This isn’t The Tenant. Kiki is also acting like a jerk, but she’s a lot more amusing. She wants to move out and take all of Silas’s stuff with her. I think that’s a great idea and so does Nina, but Franco doesn’t agree with us.

Lulu thinks Dillon is just making stuff up and gets really p.o.’d. She says she’s happy and he needs to back off.

Jordan has a talk with Dante. She points out that Dante is Valerie’s superior, which I hadn’t thought of before. If Valerie wanted to, she could create a problem for him at work. Valerie breaks into the conference and says after what happened with the pregnancy test, she’s sure there’s nothing between them anymore. Yeah, right.

Lulu tells Dante that Dillon kissed her. Valerie shows up at Dillon’s studio or wherever it is they’re filming, and wants a buddy to talk to, but when she doesn’t want a drink, Dillon thinks she is pregnant. Because that’s the only reason a woman wouldn’t want a drink.

Ava asks Morgan for help with Kiki. She sees that Kiki’s hate is eating her alive and she’s only harming herself. Ava thinks that maybe Morgan can get through to her. Why?

Nina tells Franco that she’s only been with one man, Silas. When he asks about Ric, she says she never even kissed him.

Sam thinks she has a sprained ankle, so “Jake” carries her down the castle wall like King Kong. Not really, but that would have been cool. He carries her inside and at this point, I have no idea what their proximity is to Nicholas and Hayden. Nicholas checks out on the balcony and says “Goliath,” Spencer’s favorite gargoyle, has fallen. Hayden suggests the prince’s castle is crumbling around him. Good job, “Jake” and Sam.

Commerical break. Why does the Little People Musical Dancing Palace only have one prince to three princesses?

Dante gets steamed about the Dillon/Lulu kiss, even though she says she didn’t really participate. I think he’s more concerned about what Dillon might have said about him and Valerie. Lulu says she told Dillon that the “just one kiss” was no big deal and she shouldn’t have gone so crazy over it. This just gets worse every second and I love it.

Kiki shows up at the bar, half tells off Morgan and Ava, and starts to get her drink on. She ends up throwing a drink in Ava’s face and the bartender cuts her off. She reaches over the bar for the vodka bottle and after a quick wrestle with the bartender, it drops and breaks. Kiki looks horrified at herself. The cops show up and arrest her. She’s doing pretty well playing a drunk, but once again the director went to the bathroom during the scene. No one tosses back a large vodka shot like it’s really water, even if it is.

Franco and Nina are about to put another man on her list when the phone rings. It’s Kiki’s phone, but it’s Morgan calling to tell Franco what’s happened.

Valerie ends up having a drink (thank you for making it look like a drink) with Dillon and they toast to their friendship and the people who they love who will never love them back. Even though Valerie feels nothing for Dante.

Hayden and Nicholas’s romantic moment has been interrupted by the gargoyle fall, and she says they’ve been moving too fast. She wants to recover mentally before they rekindle their relationship. She makes a few faces when she’s alone in the hallway that make me wonder if she remembers more than she’s saying.

“Jake” and Sam leave the room they’re in without even checking around. Maybe these two need new professions.

The Real Housewives of the OC

The show hasn’t even started yet, and Meghan is whining about husband Jim only being in the OC 50% of the time. She knew that when she married him. Did she forget? I wouldn’t be surprised. She says it’s a lot harder than she thought it would be and she doesn’t like it. Wah-wah.

Tamra is getting baptized. Good thing God accepts us as we are. Heather says she thinks Tamra is ready for a fresh start. Me too, but I don’t see much evidence of it. Tamra is talking about change and how everyone is going to see a new side of her. I’ll believe this when I see her walking the walk; talk is cheap. Cool. The mini choir is singing a song I know about the blood of Jesus (I sang in a Christian band for a couple of years) and they’re totally rocking it. Tamra says she found the Lord when she was going through her difficulties with her ex (who was a controlling creep), and now her mess is her message. I hope Tamra’s serious about this. After she gets dunked, the choir sings “Amazing Grace,” and everyone is all happy. This won’t last long.

I hate it with a passion when  someone changes what I’ve said to suit themselves. As much as I love Shannon, I think she has a listening problem. She’s afraid to see Vicki because she doesn’t want Vicki to call her “disgusting” again. Except Vicki never said that. She said Shannon’s remarks were disgusting. That’s two different things. Heaving huge sigh.

Commerical break. This is really weird. It’s an ad for the new Bradley Cooper movie, Burnt (which looks excellent), and they’re interspersing it with clips from the OC Wives. Why? Are they in it? Worst. Co-branding. Ever.

The food looks amazing! Geez, at my baptism, we just had cookies and coffee. Ha-ha! There’s a devil’s food and angel food cake. Vicki is avoiding the other women because she wants the day to be about Tamra and not have conflict. How long do you think this could possibly last? Some of the Wives from past seasons are there too. I agree with Vicki that she’s been more than a good friend to Shannon, and Shannon hasn’t exactly returned the favor.

These women just can’t seem to stop themselves from blabbing about Brooks. The latest story is that he claimed to call Heather’s husband, Terry, after his first chemo treatment, and Terry called a colleague to go help him. Terry says not so. Heather wonders how they could lie about something “so traceable,” and I do too. That’s the part I never get. You’d think if Brooks is a con man, he’d be better at it.

Commerical break. More coolness. Tootie from The Facts of Life is going to be on the next season of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. Move over, Nene. Oh, that’s right, you’re not there anymore. Are you doing anything now?

Vicki’s brother, Billy, is discussing Brooks with the women sans Vicki. Vicki claims she has another party to go to and wants to leave. Of course Heather is trying to stop her and brings up the Terry story. Vicki tells her she doesn’t have a clue about it. Shannon is going on and on about how Vicki asked her for help, but then didn’t take it. Shannon doesn’t seem to get it. When a friend tells you to stop talking about something, you should stop talking about it. I have a friend who is very sweet, but has the emotional level of a 10-year-old. When you ask him not to bring something up, it’s all he can talk about, and it reminds me of this bunch. Oooh, snap! Billy’s girlfriend, Ronda, says something about how Vicki didn’t ask Shannon for records about her husband cheating. Shannon claims Vicki must have put her up to it. Highly doubtful. She’s just defending her boyfriend’s sister.

Shannon goes apesh*t on Vicki. Maybe Ronda shouldn’t have said anything, but I don’t think it’s out of line for Vicki to have told her brother and Ronda, especially since by then, everyone else knew. Vicki says Shannon was pushing and pushing, and got what she deserved. Poor Vicki just wants to get out of there, but Tamra and the pastor hunt her down like a dog and want her to talk it out with Shannon. Everyone seems to have forgotten too, that Vicki’s mother recently passed away and she’s still depressed about it. IMO, these aren’t friends. Shannon confronts Vicki, and Vicki reminds her about the first season, when Shannon was somewhat ostracized and Vicki stuck by her.

Heather just said you can’t talk about someone’s business without their permission; it’s not cool. Um….

Tamra follows Vicki to the limo and tells her about Meghan calling the imaging place about the PET scan and they claimed not to do those there. It’s funny how these women claim they don’t want drama, yet they’re the ones who bring it on all the time. Funny too, how Heather says Shannon’s accident with the colonic wouldn’t happen to her. Maybe not, but she is the one who bled all over the place at Tamra’s last party because she had leeches duct taped to her stomach. At that point, she lost about 50% of her credibility with me.

This was the finale, so they had the little blurbs at the end about what everyone is doing now. Brooks and Vicki broke up (again), but I already knew that. Meghan went on and on about living by the truth and I gagged. Shannon lost 15 pounds and Brooks wants to see the records, which is pretty funny. The rest was just mundane stuff, but Heather, who was last, talked about how they really love Vicki and all this forgive and move on stuff. Here’s how I’ve felt about this season. I don’t know if Brooks is lying, although I can think of legitimate reasons for everything they’ve questioned. I took a look at the imaging place online too, and it says they do PET scans. (I’m not the only one who did this either, so at least I don’t feel alone in my ridiculousness.) If they really did tell Meghan (we never see any “records” of the snooping she’s done either) that they’d send you to the hospital, it’s possible they do the imaging, but use the hospital’s facility. But I don’t think whether he’s lying or not really matters. What matters is that, for caring friends, they didn’t handle this well. Maybe none of them have lost a parent they were close to, but I have and I know what Vicki is going through. I highly doubt she’d participate in a lie, and if she’s just being delusional, maybe she needs that right now, so leave her the blip alone. They should have been supportive and understanding and just stopped talking about it. Instead, they were relentless in their quest to prove Brooks a liar and overwhelmed her even more than she was already.

The reunion ought to be a good one.

Ladies of London

Marissa is meeting Annabelle. She’s brought some hats with her restaurant logo and wants Annabelle’s advice. I just don’t like Marissa. Something about her doesn’t sit well with me. She seems kind of phony. Like how she just went on about how their friendship is “organic,” and in the next breath, gushes about how Annabelle is a super famous fashion model. I wouldn’t know. I get the feeling she’s a sycophant.

Caroline #1’s business is not doing well. She’s got a balloon payment coming up on her store loan, due on the 31st, less than a month away. It sounds like she might have to fire people, which, unless you’re a really nasty human being, nobody wants to do. For all her stoicism and sarcasm, I think she’s a softy underneath in a lot of ways. She also has friends coming in from America. A famous gay football player, but I didn’t catch his name (Michael something or other) and I know nothing about football, only vaguely remembering when he came out. His partner and kids are with him. The last thing Caroline #1 wants to do is entertain, but it’s their first time in the UK and she feels obligated.

Annabelle is writing her fourth children’s book. Each one is about a different characteristic – Angry Me, Messy Me, and Dreamy Me. They look very cute and beneficial to kids.

Julie is going to her husband’s cousin’s estate because she wants to learn how to run her husband’s family home, Mapperton. He’s the Earl of Sandwich (I’m not kidding) and like billionth in line for the throne. The upkeep for an estate is very expensive, and some people have tours or rent the place out for weddings and such to get capital.

Caroline #1 takes her guests on a field trip – a bus tour of London. The bus looks like a ship. That’s different.  Oh wow! It really goes on the water. I’ve never seen anything like it. I want one.

The Baroness (Caroline #2) meets with Julie and Annabelle for lunch, where they discuss Juliet. The Baroness wants to help Juliet connect with her feelings or something, and Julie says good luck with that. The Baroness invites Juliet over to cook dinner together. It turns out she’s written a few cookbooks. Juliet gets the Baroness’s point that if she talked less and reacted less, people would have less to talk about.

The ladies are going bowling. Juliet says the Midwest and bowling go hand in hand. I dunno. I was never very good at bowling and thought it was kind of boring. I think my high score was a 68. Juliet has gotten them all bowling shirts – I do love a bowling shirt – with their nicknames on them. She also passes out wigs, but I don’t know what’s up with that. Joan Collins Sophie thinks bowling is fun. I feel out of this loop. Okay, they bring out the champagne and that I’m down with.

Uh-oh, Marissa makes a stupid remark about “lock up your children” in regard to the Baroness, who is dating a 30-year-old. Marissa also says he’s a bit of a d-bag in her individual interview. Oh man, she said the Baroness likes little boys. Is she drunk? Caroline #1 says that it’s really uncool to cross the Baroness. Good. Because I like the Baroness and I don’t like Marissa.

Julie and Juliet make up. Caroline #1 says Juliet is like an annoying sister and Julie says that there’s something weird about her that she likes. I like her too. She’s emotional, but fun.

Looks like there will be a sit down with Marissa and the Baroness next week.

Oct6

October 5, 2015 — GH, the OC, London & a Stink

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

Franco and Nina are out to celebrate their conscious coupling, and see Kiki doing shots at the bar. Nina says it’s a funny place for an investment job. I might agree, but I worked in investments in the 80s.The dude she’s doing shots with apparently wants payment for those shots with some nookie, and Kiki fights off his advances until Franco steps in, saying she’s his daughter. After the guy backs off, half-in-the-bag Kiki tells Franco he’s not her father, that her father was killed by Nina’s lunatic of a mother (like that’s his fault), and to get lost. Instead, he drags her sorry ass out of the bar.

Anna and Emma are having an after school snack at a table outside a restaurat. Emma says she wants to write about her grandma for a school assignment because she’s the best person in the world. Ouch! Knife to Anna’s heart. Anna tries to talk Emma into writing about her dad, but Emma basically says he’s a real bore and she’d rather write about Anna, who’s a hero and can do no wrong. Another stab. Sabrrrina shows up  and tells Emma to go in and buy some cookies, which I already know must be a ploy to talk to Anna alone.

Laura’s back! I’ve been hoping against hope that she’ll be the one who reveal’s “Jake’s” true identity. Maybe I’ll get my wish. She shows up at Patrick’s house and has flashbacks of talking to Elizabeth before she left. She notices Sam’s engagement ring. DUN-DUN-DUNNN!

Hayden is looking up old news on the laptop to try and put the pieces of her life together. Nicholas tells her that she’s looking at tabloid crap and he’s already told her everything. Nicholas thinks Hayden is up to something, but she says she’s honestly just trying to figure her past out, while she’s rocking a great new haircut. Nicholas gets kind of pissed off and leaves. I still can’t decide whether I believe her or not.

Elizabeth is out with “Jake.” It must be date night or something. These two are so unexciting as a couple, I can’t wait until this is over. “Jake” is still unnerved about Sonny calling him “Jason.” Elizabeth gets a call from Hayden, who is wondering why she broke a vase in anger at Nicholas’s castle or mansion or fiefdom or whatever it is he lives in. It’s one of the few memories that she has and Elizabeth was there. Before Elizabeth can say anything, Nicholas takes the phone from Hayden.

Paul says blah-blah-blah to Michael about getting justice for Sonny, which Tracy isn’t too thrilled about, since Sonny shot AJ. She apologizes to Michael for her outburst, but when he leaves, she tells Paul that she’s not really sorry because Sonny is a lowlife.

No surprise, Sabrrrina wants to talk to Anna about Carrrlos. While she doesn’t know he’s dead, she’s not buying that he would have shot Sonny. She thinks she would have heard from him by now, and thinks she should tell the police, but Anna says that would be a bad idea because she would have to admit to aiding and abetting after Duke’s murder. Nice save.

Laura says the reason she came to Patrick’s first is that she has a condition that needs to be monitored and asks Patrick to be her neurologist. It’s highly doubtful that’s why it was her first stop, but when she saw how cozy Patrick and Sam were, I think she hesitated to tell them about “Jake.” Dammit!

Michael has boomeranged back, and Tracy gives him a mini lecture on how he’s never been a Corinthos and should behave like the Quartermaine he is.

Kiki tells Franco that she lied so he wouldn’t feel sorry for her, and that since Silas died, she has no direction. Franco says that when he thought she was his daughter, it was some of the best time of his life, and I wonder if he’s thinking about Todd and Starr and the good old One Life To Live days.

Uh-oh, Tracy just said she’s going off to pray for patience. Don’t do it. Your patience will only get tested as a result. Sabrrrina has shown up and tells Michael she doesn’t think it’s Carrrlos who shot Sonny.

When Anna and Emma get back to Patrick’s, he and Sam tell them about the engagement. Sam says she feels like the luckiest woman in the world. Just wait, Sam.

Hayden wants to know whose secret she’s keeping, hers or Nicholas’s. She says he’s trying to control her and that every time she’s making any headway, he either gets all control freakish or flirty, which she tells him is “enjoyable and effective,” but she’s not someone who can be controlled. To prove this point, she gives in to his amorous advances as Laura walks in.

It stinks that Dr. Phil is on at the same time. Today’s show said it was about a homeless guy who thinks he’s a famous songwriter, which sounds totally delusional, but interesting.

The Real Housewives of the OC

All right, here we go. I’m already hating on Meghan when they show scenes from the previous episodes. She said she thought all children were raised the same. That’s a huge part of her problem. She thinks everything should be the way it is/was for her.

Of course when the show starts, because I stupidly watched First Look again, I had that moment where I thought I saw it before and wonder how that can be.

Brianna starts off with saying idiotic things. Brooks is away, and she, Ryan and children are staying with Vicki. Brianna and Ryan are whispering in the kitchen about how the house feels weird and smells strange. WTF is wrong with these people? Brianna is a married woman with her own family and I just don’t get how she feels she can dictate what her mother does. I still say there’s a reason why they’ve been in Oklahoma a year and have no friends.

Tamra is getting baptized. Look out for lightning storms in the OC.

Shannon and David are seeing their counselor who makes house calls. I have to admit, I wasn’t that crazy about either one of them, especially him, when they first joined the cast, but Shannon has grown to be one of my favorite wives. I have to give David props too, for getting his act together and letting us in on it. And it makes sense now why he was such a creep last season. It’s good of them to air their counseling sessions as well.

Heather, Tamra and Shannon meet for lunch. Tamra wastes no time in pointing out that Heather’s new skin products “also cure cancer.” She says this because one of the ingredients is the same as what Brooks is using to combat his cancer. But aren’t antioxidants used for more than one thing? Again, continuing from last week, there’s a big whoop-de-do about why they chose Tamra to look at Brook’s medical report. Vicki was clear that her reason for doing it was because Tamra started this whole thing with the psychotic…I mean, psychic. I recently read that the so-called psychic is sorry he ever met them, and how much do you want a bet it was a set up by Andy Cohen anyway? Maybe not Andy personally, but he is the pitchfork that prods these shows. Shannon tells them about David’s affair and to her credit, Heather had already known, but has kept her mouth shut this whole time. In Orange County, there’s a 72% divorce rate. Holy! I honestly think these two are going to make it and I’m proud of them.

Brianna says that Vicki works to make something work that shouldn’t work, because she doesn’t want to be alone. Isn’t that her business? I’ve said this before. I don’t care for Brooks, but I never see him treat Vicki like anything but a queen, so who cares if he’s lying his ass off? Brianna has had it out for him ever since (a billion seasons ago) when he was drunk and told Brianna’s husband he should smack her one. Not so nice, but I’ve wanted to smack her one several times, so I get where he was coming from. To top it off, Brianna’s husband, Ryan, doesn’t seem like much of a prize to me. He seems to have calmed down some, but he was a nasty piece of work for a while. Geez, and I thought I could hold a grudge.

Tamra is now meeting Brianna for lunch. No good is going to come from this. Brianna needs to comb her hair. She says she likes Tamra because she’s so honest. Puh-leeze. She’s nasty and uses the word “honest” to justify it. I’m hoping to God (literally) that her finding Jesus changes her personality. In her individual interview segment, Brianna says there’s nothing Brooks can do to get her to like him. Of course Tamra has to tell her about the PET scan business. Because I have no life, I’d Googled he place myself and it said they do them, so….?

Brianna talks about how Vicki has suffered because of her relationship with Brooks. Well, yeah, but that’s not because of Brooks. It’s because of you. I’m heaving huge sighs through this whole episode so far. I don’t get why everyone just doesn’t drop it.

Oh ho! Tamra says Vicki is using her to do her dirty work and “spread the news.” No comment. No, I take that back. Why is it okay for her to spread all kinds of other news – Meghan’s “research” news, the psychic’s news, any nasty news that comes into her stupid head? There was a point where I’d thought she changed and I was starting to like her, but no. Apparently, she thinks being baptized is also a beauty contest and buys an expensive dress and has her makeup done. She’s an idiot.

Holy! Shannon was doing an at home colonic and got a piece of plastic stuck inside her. She’s going to use an enema to fix this? Damn, woman, go to the ER. It turns out that nothing was there and it must have…um…come out in another way.

Whenever I see Heather and Terry, I think it must be nice to be absolutely loaded.

Everyone keeps talking about how much Tamra has changed. Are we just skipping over the bad parts? Is it me? Both Vicki and Shannon are taking separate limos to the baptism, and something doesn’t seem right about that.

In the preview, Tamra says Vicki could be going to hell for lying. Apparently, she hasn’t been paying attention in Jesus class.

Ladies of London

I love the Baroness’s (otherwise known as Caroline #2) relationship with her two Dachshunds. Her decorating skills are awesome too. She’s got a new relationship going on and she’s pretty excited about it. Her counselor also makes house calls.

Juliet stops by to see Caroline #1 and explains that she told Julie about Caroline’s mini tirade against her, and Julie had to run to Annabelle with it. Caroline #1 says Juliet must be a moron if she thinks anything she says to any of them isn’t going to be broadcast. I agree.

Marissa, who hasn’t taken the gigantic stick out of her butt yet, is discussing her new business venture with her husband. She’s whining about how it’s taking her away from her family. It’s not like she has no concept of working outside the home; what did she think was going to happen?

Annabelle and Julie go to a juice bar. Julie says that Juliet had a “look of horror,” when she passed along the info to Annabelle about Caroline #1. I don’t know what Brits consider a look of horror (even though Julie is American), but that wasn’t it IMO. I think Julie is a little unhinged actually. Everything seems to make her nervous and she’s afraid of making Caroline #1 angry. Caroline #1 has her own set of problems right now with her business (Gift Library) and I highly doubt she gives a flying about any of this. Julie claims to have some gene that makes her extra sensitive. I think maybe she reads too much. I had to take the medical dictionary away from my husband once, since he thought he had every single issue he was reading about. Annabelle tells Julie that she needs to own her feelings and confront Caroline #1, but Julie is askard of her.

Caroline and her sister-in-law, Alexis Carrington Sophie, are having a confab about the New Year’s Eve party. If all this stuff is as unimportant as they say it is, why are they still talking about it?

Marissa is meeting with some brand expert. She’s all startled that things are more expensive than she thought they would be. Welcome to the world. Julie is also trying to get some funding for her JUG balls, which are similar to energy bars. She’s sweating bullets over it, which is no surprise, since she seems to get nervous over just about everything. She’s so nervous, she makes me nervous just watching her. She’s been distributing her Scweddy JUG balls herself, but it’s time to branch out. More ball jokes, but she gets the investors on board.

It’s Joan Collins’s Sophie’s birthday, so all the girls are paying tribute. Julie is “petrified” over seeing Caroline #1 for the first time since the New Year’s Eve debacle. What a shock. Where’s Ramona when you need her to scream, “Take a Xanax!”  What do they call not being able to leave high school in the UK? OMG. Julie looks like such a suck up. Annabelle isn’t impressed and says the only way to deal with Caroline #1 is to stand up to her, but instead, Julie gives her a present. And seriously, she looks like a panting puppy while waiting for Caroline #1’s approval.  It seems like more of a bachelorette party than a birthday. They stab at piñatas that have sex toys in them.  Because she’s really mad at Caroline #1, Julie picks a fight with Juliet. I’m starting not to like Julie. Why am I fighting with Juliet about fighting with Caroline when I’m not fighting about Caroline? says Juliet. Why indeed.

And I don’t think Caroline #1 is scary at all. I quite like her. She’s says after an issue with someone, she moves on and gets over it, because life is too short to do otherwise. She, Victoria Gotti Sophie and Juliet have a nice talk and hugs all around.

Next week looks interesting. They’re going bowling in wigs. And Caroline #1 is going to have to deal with New Yorkers. Ha-ha!

Reeker

Because Halloween is coming up and this is one of my favorite horror films and it’s on Showtime rotation.

The title of this film is somewhat off-putting and I almost didn’t watch it the first time because of that. When I saw Michael Ironside was in it though, I decided to give it a look. He’s a wonderful actor (loved him in V) and also a lovely human being.

I don’t want to say too much about this film, since it has a surprise ending. It’s actually one of those films you might want to watch more than once to catch the clues. It’s no The Usual Suspects, but it’s pretty clever.

A group of kids (not kid kids, but young people) are lost and stumble upon what looks like the Halfway Tourist Oasis, a deserted motel, diner and gas station. It looks like it was inhabited not long before, as all the lights are still on and it looks like everyone left in a hurry. It also stinks to high heaven, hence the film title. When one of them tries to go down the road to find help, he runs into Michael Ironside, who’s driving around in circles in an RV, looking for his missing wife.

Throughout the film, strange characters show up, like a dude whose bottom half is chopped off, along with a hooded figure that keeps making a periodic appearance. Bad things start happening and that’s all I’m going to say.

While this isn’t exactly a classic, it’s well worth taking the time to watch. The pace is good, the story is intelligent and a little different, the gore is nicely done, and the ending is satisfying.

Sep29

September 28, 2015 — GH, the OC & London

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

General Hospital

It was good of them to go back to Friday’s last minute with the first minute today, since ABC broke in with non-breaking news on Friday.  Ava picks up where she left off, saying she knows who shot Sonny.

Oh, hi, Anna! Are you still on this show?

I’m not sure if I’m going to make it to November 6 (I.e. the “Jake”/Elizabeth wedding when they’ll probably wrap this up). Now Sam says she feels like Jason is right beside her, and he is. Please, I can’t take this anymore. They’re in the garden of some Asian restaurant and it just so happens that the owners’ son is the one who married Jason and Sam. The dude’s grandmother comes out. She’s blind, but her other senses are super keen. She tells Jake that he’s Jason.

Oh ho! Blame the dead guy! Ava says it was Carrrlos who shot Sonny. I wish he had shot Sonny, since that means he’d still be on the show. Good logic though. She says he was “working his way up,” starting with Duke. Since very few people know he’s dead, this might work.

Anna, Julian and Alexis are going around and around about who killed Duke. Wasn’t this like last year? Oh snap! Julian suggests Anna deal with Carrrlos, unless she already did.  Either Julian knows more than he’s letting on or he’s a really good guesser.

Sonny wants to marry Carly in the hospital.

The old Asian lady is convinced that Jake is Jason. She thinks they’re there to celebrate their anniversary.

At the mob sit down, everyone, including the one other woman who’s at the table, is wearing either black or navy blue, so Ava totally stands out in her orange get-up and blonde hair. I really do love her outfit, but she’s been wearing it for days. Everyone votes for an “immediate cease fire,” even though there hasn’t been any shooting since Sonny got shot.

Commercial break. The Soaps in Depth magazine has a big article on how Morgan and Michael will be fighting for Sonny’s territory. I’m not so sure either one of them could get a fast food order right.

Anna sees Paul and it’s like old home week. Michael agrees to mob peace. He looks incredibly out of place with all of the adults. It reminds me of that scene in Fast Times at Ridgemont High when Mark and Stacy go on a date, and he forgets his wallet. All of a sudden, everyone wants to look for Carrrlos.

Back at the restaurant, this is the most sighted-looking blind person I’ve ever seen. Do the directors on this show walk off the set periodically throughout the day? The grandmother wants Sam and “Jason” (I don’t even know where to use quote marks now) to renew their vows and it looks like they’re going to humor her. Who does that? By God, someone is going to get married today.

And it’s Sonny.

Jake says the vow renewal might help Sam get over Jason. What? Did you know a bride and groom are a dragon and phoenix? Me neither. We get the vow renewal interspersed with Sonny’s wedding. Lots of hearts and flowers and birds flying around with ribbons in their mouths.

And in the timing that soaps are famous for, just as the rings are about to be exchanged, Sonny goes into cardiac arrest.

The Real Housewives of the OC

I’m so glad Shannon and her husband, David, are putting their marriage back together. Shannon seems weirded out by the pretty much everything, from the restaurant menu to Brooks and Vicki.

Tamra is getting baptized. Someone needs to help her out. Where is that pastor? She says that someone should make a blonde version of the bible since it’s not an easy read. Has no one told her that there are about a million different translations and they probably have that one? Is she reading the King James? No wonder she’s having a problem. Pastor Mike seems like a nice guy and I like his thought that Jesus is the GPS system for our lives, but he isn’t really teaching her very well. I knew a Pastor Mike, but this isn’t him. At least Tamra isn’t calling him a “pasture” any more. That joke was getting old.

Vicki and Brooks are visiting a doctor that practices both Eastern and Western medicine. His intern, or whatever she is, talks about organic coffee enemas. Um…no thanks. I’m all for holistic treatment, but not coffee in my butt.

I’m seriously not understanding the whole Brooks is faking cancer thing. This dude is a doctor, he’s looking at medical records and Brooks is getting some kind of IV oxygenation treatment. If he’s faking, he’s certainly doing a good job, but wouldn’t some doctor along the way have noticed?

Heather and Terry are getting ready to hawk their skincare line on a home shopping channel. Terry is freaking somewhat because it’s live TV. Heather is hoping he can “rise to the challenge,” which means she hopes he doesn’t make a fool of both of them. After the leech incident, I’m not sure I would trust them with my skin care. It doesn’t have slug spit or something in it, does it? Terry is stumbling all over the place at rehearsal, but I like him anyway. Heather is mystified that he’s having a problem with this, but it’s totally understandable. Seriously, I’d be more concerned about having credibility after duct taping leeches to my stomach. Heather says bad dress rehearsal, good show. We used to say that when I worked in theatre too, but that doesn’t make it true.

Tamra is helping Ryan to move in to his new home. The one she forked over the 8 grand for him to buy. She goes over to Vicki’s and gives Brooks a hug like nothing ever happened. Did we miss something? In the last episode, Tamra was screaming at him. Brooks shows Tamra some paper about the results of his PET scan. Now I already know that Meghan is going to challenge this by calling the facility and finding out they don’t do PET scans there. If this is the case though, what’s up with the doctor they just visited? Unless Brooks is honestly convinced he has it and doesn’t, and has also managed to convince the medical people he’s seeing, I don’t know what to make of this.

Interesting. In talking about raising her stepdaughter, Meghan thought all kids were raised the same. This explains a lot, since she doesn’t seem to understand anything outside her narrow realm of experience. They have an amazing kitchen. I’m apparently doomed to having a kitchen the size of a postage stamp. When I moved from an apartment to an 8-room house, the kitchen was actually smaller than the one in my last apartment.

Terry is doing well on the actual show. Since no one has anything better to do, the rest of the ladies get together to watch – without Vicki, since it’s at Meghan’s house. Apparently, one of the ingredients in the product is the same as the antioxidant Brooks claimed to be using to fight his cancer, so Lizzie makes a stupid comment that their product must cure cancer. 1) It didn’t look like the same spelling or sound like the exact same thing, 2) antioxidants can be used for more than one thing, 3) wouldn’t Heather have mentioned that when they talked about it before? and 4) what an freaking stupid thing to say. Tamra makes a prank phone call to the show which is pretty funny, but Heather and Terry are only fooled for 5 seconds. Aww, Terry and Heather are all in love again after the show.

Here comes the part where Meghan called the facility. Twice. Tamra wonders why she was the chosen one to see the report and of course Meghan thinks it’s because Tamra is the idiot of the group. She asks why they weren’t shown to her since she has a “medical background” – because she’s seen medical records before. Um….  Shannon’s feelings are hurt because Vicki didn’t include her and she’s been their biggest advocate. It seems that she forgot  that twice she made Vicki extremely upset because she couldn’t stop talking when Vicki asked her to shut up. Tamra and Vicki also used to be besties and she’s known Tamra a helluva lot longer than the others.

In playing devil’s advocate, I can totally come up with reasons for every piece of information about Brook’s cancer that is cropping up. And how can he be such a smooth con man that he fools doctors, yet makes these huge mistakes? On the other hand, WTF? ??

Ladies of London

We’re back at the New Year’s Eve party, which at this point is going on way too long. Caroline #1’s SIL is way drunk and totally supportive of Caroline making humping gestures over Juliet’s prone husband while in a unicorn costume. I’m not sure why this is okay. Will someone please support me here?  Yes, it wasn’t exactly sexy, but it was still out of line. Juliet decides to apologize for overreacting (which she really didn’t) and it doesn’t go well because the SIL, Joan Collins Sophie, keeps instigating. I get revenge the next morning because they all have serious hangovers.

What I don’t get about some of these women is that they act like all kinds of propriety should be followed, but then act like inappropriate idiots themselves. They keep pointing the finger at the “emotional” Americans, yet act like teenagers being given alcohol for the first time. I guess it’s one of those things where it’s a different set of rules for everyone. I hate that. HA-HA! Marissa’s mascara is all over her face. Go wash up, you cow.

The next morning everyone comes down to the chaotic confetti-laden room for breakfast. Caroline #1 is annoyed because Juliet is acting like nothing happened. Isn’t that what she wanted? Caroline had also been bitching about Julie getting weepy when she was drunk and now takes back her apology. Annabelle says it’s a “truly ungracious moment” and I agree. It’s sad. I liked Caroline #1, but now she’s acting like a complete a-hole. I think some of these ladies – and I use the term loosely – probably shouldn’t drink.

The two Carolines meet for a walk. Caroline #1 says Juliet was “looking for a fight.” Sorry. Don’t see it that way. She sees an online article from the Sunday Times business section via her phone. It’s Marissa promoting her new restaurant venture, and the picture shows her showing off a hot dog. (This is not a euphemism for anything. She has a literal hot dog in her hands. It looks pretty good too.) Caroline #1 of course has something snarky to say and I can’t wait for it to get back to Marissa, who also thinks her poopy doesn’t stink and whose feelings will be hurt no matter how she shrugs it off. I want to see these  two with the biggest egos go at it. That is if both of their heads can fit in one room.

Caroline #1 (is the whole show about her tonight?) has to pay some note (a loan to us Yanks) in regard to her store and the Christmas sales were not what they’d hoped for. I do feel for her on this front. Its date night for her and her husband, who travels an awful lot for work. I believe her shoe closet is entirely worth it though. In discussing her latest phone call with Juliet, she sounds like a middle-schooler. I don’t know why, but it still surprises me when people who seem so sophisticated are reduced to total morons once the cameras are rolling. Lisa Vanderpump, we salute you. You’re the only one with any dignity left.

The Baroness (Caroline #2) is taking a trip to her homeland of Denmark. She lands in Copenhagen, which makes me remember signing a petition about them unnecessarily euthanizing zoo animals. Wanting to visit and crossing it off the list in the same second. I kind of like this Caroline, although my jury’s still out due to the other Caroline. She lost her mother at a young age and is very close to her grandmother.  OMG – her grandmother has the most fabulous teapot ever! It sort of looks like a cabbage head. I love that type of ceramic serving piece and have some of them myself. I once worked for Lord & Taylor’s corporate office across from the Fifth Avenue store, where they occasionally had sample sales for the employees. I was thrilled to snag a few for about 8 bucks each, since normally they were way out of my price league. That also tells you something about the markup.

Julie, Annabelle and Juliet are having lunch. I want to eat at every restaurant they show on here. Julie is talking about Caroline #1’s anti-apology.  Julie has told Annabelle about Caroline #1 getting nasty on the phone with Juliet, and Juliet isn’t happy about that. The other two think she’s afraid of Caroline. Yep, we’re still in high school.

Next week’s coming attraction shows them being at another event where they’re drinking. I just can’t imagine what the outcome will be. I just hope it doesn’t involve animal costumes.

Sep22

September 21, 2015 — GH, OC & NYE in London

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

Blah-blah-blah, romantic stuff with Sam and Patrick. The only thing that will make this worthwhile for me is if Robin shows up. Or if nuJason does, since the reason Sam tells Patrick “not yet” is because it’s around this time she married Jason.

What up with TJ that he thinks Morgan is just going to “rough up” Julian? How much more obvious can it be that Morgan is psychotic?  Nice save on Alexis’s part. She tells Morgan that if he pulls the trigger, he’ll kill Sonny. Bet that is screwing with Morgan’s thought process.

Instead of chatting up Mayor Lomax, Paul is chatting up Ava. It turns out he has the confession recording and he wants something “complicated” in return. Oh goodie. I can’t wait.

Maxie is wearing the cutest romper!

Oooh, it’s Paul who had Sonny shot. Nothing like throwing in a ringer. Is this the first we’re hearing about his organized crime ties? At least they said “organized crime” and not “the business.”  Apparently, he wants to run Julian’s territory with Ava. This is rather a weird proposition, since Ava hasn’t had anything to do with that, except for gossiping with Julian. Is her new job going to be shaking people down? I want to smack Paul when he says he likes her hair. Blue-eyed blondes are a dime a dozen on these shows. Although I do like the idea of a lady mob boss. I thought The Sopranos missed a golden opportunity with that.

Sonny says he’s fine now. Okay. Sonny tells Elizabeth how glad he is she got her son back, and too bad Jason isn’t around to see it. Ah-ha! (in Nelson voice) Rub it in good, Sonny.

Maxie just asked Tracy why a lawyer (meaning Paul) would want to get involved with a bunch of criminals. She does live in this world, right? I think maybe Tracy needs to find some friends closer to her own age. Not that I’m opposed to having friends of all ages, but does she really want to take love life advice from 20-year-olds?  I’m with Maxie, clothes are wearable art and an extension of self. She’s really pushing this Tracy/Paul thing.

Did Paul just ask if he could “top [Ava’s] wine?” She’s drinking a martini. The director must have fallen asleep during the Sam/Patrick scenes.

Man, is TJ a dumbass. Morgan could have shot Julian ten times in the amount of time it’s taking for Michael to convince TJ that Morgan is dangerous in his manic state.

Commercial break. Yes, I understand Blue Buffalo is a wonderful pet food, but you try to get my dogs to eat it. I spent a fortune on a bag of it and they looked at me like I had two heads and refused to take one bite. OMG – it’s a guy in his work cube on the toilet. Has it come to that?

No surprise we end with an offstage bang

The Real Housewives of the OC

Why does Tamra keep adding to what Brooks said about considering the source? First of all, he said it in conjunction with saying he’d never talked to her – which he hadn’t. And she keeps adding all these nasty nuances that just weren’t there.

How can Heather say that this is a group of people who love Vicki? Meghan has made it very clear that she does not love Vicki and nothing could be further from the truth.

Can you tell these girls are all getting on my nerves? Let me make it clear that I don’t care for Brooks and never have, but I like what’s going on even less. The bottom line is that this is none of their business. I can’t even believe they spend this much time discussing it. Heather has told Vicki that they should produce the medical documents to prove everyone wrong, but Vicki doesn’t want to because 1) it’s none of their business and 2) she shouldn’t have to do that with people who know her. I’m not even saying Brooks isn’t lying and he’s fooling Vicki, but to bombard her with crap she doesn’t need right now is wrong. And I know from what I speak. I’ve personally had a situation where someone didn’t believe me. I totally have the proof in print to show them that what I’ve said is true, but I’m not going to show it to them. This person has known me for almost 30 years and has no business doubting me. So believe what you want, but you’ll be believing it from somewhere else because we are no longer friends.

Everyone is sooo stressed over this. Hey, here’s my prescription for that – stop talking about it.

Vicki says that Tamra went apesh*t for no reason, since her track record for passing along info isn’t exactly great. Telephone, teleTamra – ha-ha-ha! That reminds me of how my grandfather used to say (about my grandmother), “Telegraph, telephone, tell Marie.” Vicki also says that Tamra had no business running to Meghan with what Jim had told Brooks. It’s like these women are a bunch of 14-year-olds who can’t wait to pass along any gossip. While I do know a couple of adults who are like this, I certainly don’t make them privy to any information I’m given about anyone. Vicki leaves the Aries party early and the women say she ran away from the issue. It seems to be all anyone can talk about and sometimes you do have to just walk away. Shannon and Vicki subsequently have a lunch, but once again, it’s the only topic. Seriously, at this point, even if Brooks is lying, I’m taking his side.

Twitter, Google, et al must go nuts after these shows air.

Terry isn’t crazy about Heather’s sketch of some window she wants to put in at the new house that involves a tree and some birds that symbolize the kids. I’m with him – if you don’t want my honest opinion, don’t ask for it. Heather claims it’s not his honest opinion about the window she cares about, but she wants acknowledgement of her hard work. Well, then ask for that instead of his opinion about the window. I hate when someone expects me to be a mind reader.

I don’t blame Eddie for not wanting to support Tamra’s adult son. Tamra says that Ryan (her son) is still figuring his life’s plan out and he always does it the hard way. How hard is getting 8000 bucks from your mom?

Cool! Lisa Rinna is having dinner with Heather. I love her so much! She and Eileen Davidson were the best thing to happen to the Beverly Hills Wives since Kyle called out Kim for being an alcoholic. She’s with me on the mind reading thing too.

OMG-OMG-OMG! Next week it shows Brooks producing some document, but then Meghan saying they don’t do that test at wherever it was he went. I have a couple of thoughts here. I worked in a women’s clinic for a couple of years, so I know they don’t always give everyone all the information. I don’t know how Meghan approached them, so this Devil’s Advocate theory is on hold. The other thought is that everyone keeps saying Brooks is such a smooth con man. Why would he go through all the trouble of cooking up a fake document and make a mistake like that?

Discuss.

** Author’s note: A few episodes ago, in writing about Brook’s treatment, I should have said it was “reservatrol” that was being used.

Ladies of London

Annabelle writes children’s books, using the alienation she felt as a child, growing up in privileged society. I want to say something sarcastic about her having it so tough, but everyone has their own set of problems, and everyone’s problems are just as important to them as mine are to me. The angel shoulder won out this time.

Marissa, who I’m growing not too fond of, runs restaurants with her husband, but she wants her own gig. She’s going to open a place that sells organic hot dogs, fries and shakes, what she calls American street food. Maybe in California, where she’s from, but that don’t sound like no Sabrett.

Julie and Juliet (thank God there’s no Julia…yet) are planning a get together to watch the fireworks on New Year’s Eve. This startles me and I think I’ve lost time, until I realize this is not in sync with the real calendar.

The Christmas numbers for Caroline’s store are not good. Her assistant, or manager, or whatever she is wants her to be all emotional, but that’s not the way Caroline #1 rolls. Julie is meeting her for lunch. Julie makes some kind of energy “balls” (similar to energy bars), and is marketing them to gyms and studios, but is ready for the big league. They verge on making jokes akin to the Schweddy Balls sketch on SNL, and discuss her business plan.

The New Year’s Eve party, in Juliet’s penthouse, looks fabulous. And Marissa looks like she has a stick up her butt. Things start off well, but after swilling a lot of champagne, Julie and Caroline #2 (the baroness) do a headstand trying to make some yoga point. Caroline #1 says something that Julie takes as “a massive dig” at her and she’s crying, but I don’t see it and blame it on the booze champagne. Or maybe this is something only yoga people understand. What really doesn’t make sense is that Caroline was all kinds of insulting at their lunch and Julie just laughed it off. Caroline apologizes, but Julie doesn’t want to let it go. More champagne, please!

This is so freaking cool! They go up to the roof to watch the Londoners partying in the street below. It reminds me of the New Year’s Eve scene in The Spice Girls‘ One Hour of Girl Power. They go back in and drink some more. Caroline #1 brings in a bunch of animal costume onesies for adults. I’m really not sure what to make of this. No more for Caroline. Juliet’s husband is lying on a couch pre-nursing a hangover, and Caroline #1 straddles him and makes rude movements.  She just got done saying that someone with a title shouldn’t be standing on their head. I’m losing respect quickly.

So is Juliet and it says “to be continued.”

Congrats to Game of Thrones on their Emmy sweep!