What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

General Hospital

Franco and Nina are out to celebrate their conscious coupling, and see Kiki doing shots at the bar. Nina says it’s a funny place for an investment job. I might agree, but I worked in investments in the 80s.The dude she’s doing shots with apparently wants payment for those shots with some nookie, and Kiki fights off his advances until Franco steps in, saying she’s his daughter. After the guy backs off, half-in-the-bag Kiki tells Franco he’s not her father, that her father was killed by Nina’s lunatic of a mother (like that’s his fault), and to get lost. Instead, he drags her sorry ass out of the bar.

Anna and Emma are having an after school snack at a table outside a restaurat. Emma says she wants to write about her grandma for a school assignment because she’s the best person in the world. Ouch! Knife to Anna’s heart. Anna tries to talk Emma into writing about her dad, but Emma basically says he’s a real bore and she’d rather write about Anna, who’s a hero and can do no wrong. Another stab. Sabrrrina shows up  and tells Emma to go in and buy some cookies, which I already know must be a ploy to talk to Anna alone.

Laura’s back! I’ve been hoping against hope that she’ll be the one who reveal’s “Jake’s” true identity. Maybe I’ll get my wish. She shows up at Patrick’s house and has flashbacks of talking to Elizabeth before she left. She notices Sam’s engagement ring. DUN-DUN-DUNNN!

Hayden is looking up old news on the laptop to try and put the pieces of her life together. Nicholas tells her that she’s looking at tabloid crap and he’s already told her everything. Nicholas thinks Hayden is up to something, but she says she’s honestly just trying to figure her past out, while she’s rocking a great new haircut. Nicholas gets kind of pissed off and leaves. I still can’t decide whether I believe her or not.

Elizabeth is out with “Jake.” It must be date night or something. These two are so unexciting as a couple, I can’t wait until this is over. “Jake” is still unnerved about Sonny calling him “Jason.” Elizabeth gets a call from Hayden, who is wondering why she broke a vase in anger at Nicholas’s castle or mansion or fiefdom or whatever it is he lives in. It’s one of the few memories that she has and Elizabeth was there. Before Elizabeth can say anything, Nicholas takes the phone from Hayden.

Paul says blah-blah-blah to Michael about getting justice for Sonny, which Tracy isn’t too thrilled about, since Sonny shot AJ. She apologizes to Michael for her outburst, but when he leaves, she tells Paul that she’s not really sorry because Sonny is a lowlife.

No surprise, Sabrrrina wants to talk to Anna about Carrrlos. While she doesn’t know he’s dead, she’s not buying that he would have shot Sonny. She thinks she would have heard from him by now, and thinks she should tell the police, but Anna says that would be a bad idea because she would have to admit to aiding and abetting after Duke’s murder. Nice save.

Laura says the reason she came to Patrick’s first is that she has a condition that needs to be monitored and asks Patrick to be her neurologist. It’s highly doubtful that’s why it was her first stop, but when she saw how cozy Patrick and Sam were, I think she hesitated to tell them about “Jake.” Dammit!

Michael has boomeranged back, and Tracy gives him a mini lecture on how he’s never been a Corinthos and should behave like the Quartermaine he is.

Kiki tells Franco that she lied so he wouldn’t feel sorry for her, and that since Silas died, she has no direction. Franco says that when he thought she was his daughter, it was some of the best time of his life, and I wonder if he’s thinking about Todd and Starr and the good old One Life To Live days.

Uh-oh, Tracy just said she’s going off to pray for patience. Don’t do it. Your patience will only get tested as a result. Sabrrrina has shown up and tells Michael she doesn’t think it’s Carrrlos who shot Sonny.

When Anna and Emma get back to Patrick’s, he and Sam tell them about the engagement. Sam says she feels like the luckiest woman in the world. Just wait, Sam.

Hayden wants to know whose secret she’s keeping, hers or Nicholas’s. She says he’s trying to control her and that every time she’s making any headway, he either gets all control freakish or flirty, which she tells him is “enjoyable and effective,” but she’s not someone who can be controlled. To prove this point, she gives in to his amorous advances as Laura walks in.

It stinks that Dr. Phil is on at the same time. Today’s show said it was about a homeless guy who thinks he’s a famous songwriter, which sounds totally delusional, but interesting.

The Real Housewives of the OC

All right, here we go. I’m already hating on Meghan when they show scenes from the previous episodes. She said she thought all children were raised the same. That’s a huge part of her problem. She thinks everything should be the way it is/was for her.

Of course when the show starts, because I stupidly watched First Look again, I had that moment where I thought I saw it before and wonder how that can be.

Brianna starts off with saying idiotic things. Brooks is away, and she, Ryan and children are staying with Vicki. Brianna and Ryan are whispering in the kitchen about how the house feels weird and smells strange. WTF is wrong with these people? Brianna is a married woman with her own family and I just don’t get how she feels she can dictate what her mother does. I still say there’s a reason why they’ve been in Oklahoma a year and have no friends.

Tamra is getting baptized. Look out for lightning storms in the OC.

Shannon and David are seeing their counselor who makes house calls. I have to admit, I wasn’t that crazy about either one of them, especially him, when they first joined the cast, but Shannon has grown to be one of my favorite wives. I have to give David props too, for getting his act together and letting us in on it. And it makes sense now why he was such a creep last season. It’s good of them to air their counseling sessions as well.

Heather, Tamra and Shannon meet for lunch. Tamra wastes no time in pointing out that Heather’s new skin products “also cure cancer.” She says this because one of the ingredients is the same as what Brooks is using to combat his cancer. But aren’t antioxidants used for more than one thing? Again, continuing from last week, there’s a big whoop-de-do about why they chose Tamra to look at Brook’s medical report. Vicki was clear that her reason for doing it was because Tamra started this whole thing with the psychotic…I mean, psychic. I recently read that the so-called psychic is sorry he ever met them, and how much do you want a bet it was a set up by Andy Cohen anyway? Maybe not Andy personally, but he is the pitchfork that prods these shows. Shannon tells them about David’s affair and to her credit, Heather had already known, but has kept her mouth shut this whole time. In Orange County, there’s a 72% divorce rate. Holy! I honestly think these two are going to make it and I’m proud of them.

Brianna says that Vicki works to make something work that shouldn’t work, because she doesn’t want to be alone. Isn’t that her business? I’ve said this before. I don’t care for Brooks, but I never see him treat Vicki like anything but a queen, so who cares if he’s lying his ass off? Brianna has had it out for him ever since (a billion seasons ago) when he was drunk and told Brianna’s husband he should smack her one. Not so nice, but I’ve wanted to smack her one several times, so I get where he was coming from. To top it off, Brianna’s husband, Ryan, doesn’t seem like much of a prize to me. He seems to have calmed down some, but he was a nasty piece of work for a while. Geez, and I thought I could hold a grudge.

Tamra is now meeting Brianna for lunch. No good is going to come from this. Brianna needs to comb her hair. She says she likes Tamra because she’s so honest. Puh-leeze. She’s nasty and uses the word “honest” to justify it. I’m hoping to God (literally) that her finding Jesus changes her personality. In her individual interview segment, Brianna says there’s nothing Brooks can do to get her to like him. Of course Tamra has to tell her about the PET scan business. Because I have no life, I’d Googled he place myself and it said they do them, so….?

Brianna talks about how Vicki has suffered because of her relationship with Brooks. Well, yeah, but that’s not because of Brooks. It’s because of you. I’m heaving huge sighs through this whole episode so far. I don’t get why everyone just doesn’t drop it.

Oh ho! Tamra says Vicki is using her to do her dirty work and “spread the news.” No comment. No, I take that back. Why is it okay for her to spread all kinds of other news – Meghan’s “research” news, the psychic’s news, any nasty news that comes into her stupid head? There was a point where I’d thought she changed and I was starting to like her, but no. Apparently, she thinks being baptized is also a beauty contest and buys an expensive dress and has her makeup done. She’s an idiot.

Holy! Shannon was doing an at home colonic and got a piece of plastic stuck inside her. She’s going to use an enema to fix this? Damn, woman, go to the ER. It turns out that nothing was there and it must have…um…come out in another way.

Whenever I see Heather and Terry, I think it must be nice to be absolutely loaded.

Everyone keeps talking about how much Tamra has changed. Are we just skipping over the bad parts? Is it me? Both Vicki and Shannon are taking separate limos to the baptism, and something doesn’t seem right about that.

In the preview, Tamra says Vicki could be going to hell for lying. Apparently, she hasn’t been paying attention in Jesus class.

Ladies of London

I love the Baroness’s (otherwise known as Caroline #2) relationship with her two Dachshunds. Her decorating skills are awesome too. She’s got a new relationship going on and she’s pretty excited about it. Her counselor also makes house calls.

Juliet stops by to see Caroline #1 and explains that she told Julie about Caroline’s mini tirade against her, and Julie had to run to Annabelle with it. Caroline #1 says Juliet must be a moron if she thinks anything she says to any of them isn’t going to be broadcast. I agree.

Marissa, who hasn’t taken the gigantic stick out of her butt yet, is discussing her new business venture with her husband. She’s whining about how it’s taking her away from her family. It’s not like she has no concept of working outside the home; what did she think was going to happen?

Annabelle and Julie go to a juice bar. Julie says that Juliet had a “look of horror,” when she passed along the info to Annabelle about Caroline #1. I don’t know what Brits consider a look of horror (even though Julie is American), but that wasn’t it IMO. I think Julie is a little unhinged actually. Everything seems to make her nervous and she’s afraid of making Caroline #1 angry. Caroline #1 has her own set of problems right now with her business (Gift Library) and I highly doubt she gives a flying about any of this. Julie claims to have some gene that makes her extra sensitive. I think maybe she reads too much. I had to take the medical dictionary away from my husband once, since he thought he had every single issue he was reading about. Annabelle tells Julie that she needs to own her feelings and confront Caroline #1, but Julie is askard of her.

Caroline and her sister-in-law, Alexis Carrington Sophie, are having a confab about the New Year’s Eve party. If all this stuff is as unimportant as they say it is, why are they still talking about it?

Marissa is meeting with some brand expert. She’s all startled that things are more expensive than she thought they would be. Welcome to the world. Julie is also trying to get some funding for her JUG balls, which are similar to energy bars. She’s sweating bullets over it, which is no surprise, since she seems to get nervous over just about everything. She’s so nervous, she makes me nervous just watching her. She’s been distributing her Scweddy JUG balls herself, but it’s time to branch out. More ball jokes, but she gets the investors on board.

It’s Joan Collins’s Sophie’s birthday, so all the girls are paying tribute. Julie is “petrified” over seeing Caroline #1 for the first time since the New Year’s Eve debacle. What a shock. Where’s Ramona when you need her to scream, “Take a Xanax!”  What do they call not being able to leave high school in the UK? OMG. Julie looks like such a suck up. Annabelle isn’t impressed and says the only way to deal with Caroline #1 is to stand up to her, but instead, Julie gives her a present. And seriously, she looks like a panting puppy while waiting for Caroline #1’s approval.  It seems like more of a bachelorette party than a birthday. They stab at piñatas that have sex toys in them.  Because she’s really mad at Caroline #1, Julie picks a fight with Juliet. I’m starting not to like Julie. Why am I fighting with Juliet about fighting with Caroline when I’m not fighting about Caroline? says Juliet. Why indeed.

And I don’t think Caroline #1 is scary at all. I quite like her. She’s says after an issue with someone, she moves on and gets over it, because life is too short to do otherwise. She, Victoria Gotti Sophie and Juliet have a nice talk and hugs all around.

Next week looks interesting. They’re going bowling in wigs. And Caroline #1 is going to have to deal with New Yorkers. Ha-ha!

Reeker

Because Halloween is coming up and this is one of my favorite horror films and it’s on Showtime rotation.

The title of this film is somewhat off-putting and I almost didn’t watch it the first time because of that. When I saw Michael Ironside was in it though, I decided to give it a look. He’s a wonderful actor (loved him in V) and also a lovely human being.

I don’t want to say too much about this film, since it has a surprise ending. It’s actually one of those films you might want to watch more than once to catch the clues. It’s no The Usual Suspects, but it’s pretty clever.

A group of kids (not kid kids, but young people) are lost and stumble upon what looks like the Halfway Tourist Oasis, a deserted motel, diner and gas station. It looks like it was inhabited not long before, as all the lights are still on and it looks like everyone left in a hurry. It also stinks to high heaven, hence the film title. When one of them tries to go down the road to find help, he runs into Michael Ironside, who’s driving around in circles in an RV, looking for his missing wife.

Throughout the film, strange characters show up, like a dude whose bottom half is chopped off, along with a hooded figure that keeps making a periodic appearance. Bad things start happening and that’s all I’m going to say.

While this isn’t exactly a classic, it’s well worth taking the time to watch. The pace is good, the story is intelligent and a little different, the gore is nicely done, and the ending is satisfying.