What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

Wow. I’m having quite a week. This morning, my computer was fighting with me. But TV waits for no man, or woman, so as promised, here is yesterday’s General Hospital and Part Two of the Southern Charm reunion.  So much Ashley, so little cognizance. The reunion was also an hour and a half, so it threw me off. I wish they’d just make it three episodes. Friday’s GH to come tonight… I hope.

General Hospital

Alexis walks into the hospital while on the phone. She says she’ll deliver the news. Julian sees her, and says he heard about her kickass meeting for Kiki, and thanks her. She says she’s proud of Kiki standing up for herself and other women. She says she’s there on urgent business, and Julian hopes there’s nothing wrong. She says it’s good news for a change.

Jordan tells Chase that Nelle is unpredictable. She hopes he knows how to handle the game he cooked up. It’s risky; they’re putting Michael’s life in danger. She wants it locked up without a chance of a mistake.

Nelle and Michael talk about the baby coming. He says they’ll get her bag together when they get home. She hopes he feels as good as she does hearing him say that. He says she doesn’t know how much. She says they have the rest of their lives to

Franco is in Doc’s office. He says Drew came through for him. He’s not just coming to the wedding, he agreed to be best man. Although he might be doing it for Elizabeth. Elizabeth walks in, and Franco wonders what she’s doing there. She says she’s dropping off files. What’s his excuse? He says, therapy session, and she says, by himself? He’s practicing, to stay in shape until the real thing happens. Doc said it was okay. Elizabeth says he called from the airport. He’s back.

Doc comes by Sonny’s place. Sonny asks how Spencer is, and Doc says, tearing it up. Laura is good, but anxious to come home. Sonny says she’s been gone a while; he must miss her. Carly is gone, and Sonny misses her too. Jason says they all do. Sonny thinks it’s time they bring her home. He wants to have a conversation about how they’ll make that happen.

Mary Pat puts lotion on Carly’s hands, asking her if it doesn’t feel good to get out of that stuffy room, and take some air. She has a big appointment today, and she wants to look her best for what’s to come. I don’t think Carly knows what’s going on. She’s pretty out of it.

Julian doesn’t mean to pray, and Alexis says it’s not her information to give. It’s for Brad. Brad asks if he’ being sued, and she says, not by her. She asks if he wants to find somewhere private, but he’s good with talking there. If he doesn’t lose his mind first. She says he’ll need his faculties for what’s to come. And diapers too. Congratulations, he and Lucas are parents.

Franco thought Doc was away until next week, and Elizabeth says, that was the plan, but something came up with a patient. Franco asks if it’s him; it usually is. She ask if he doesn’t have a thing. He does, and jets.

Jordan listens to the recording of Nelle, and says it’s enough to bring her in. Chase says not enough to convict her. She’s cunning. She’ll know she has enough wiggle room to skate. Michael won’t quit until Carly is out. He says she won’t see it coming; she’ll have no time to adjust. Jordan says she’s good. She fooled Sonny. Chase says that lit a fire under Michael. Jordan hopes so. It’s their only chance.

Doc was under the impression Carly was in good hands when he left. Jason says. there’s nothing good about the people at Ferncliff. Doc doesn’t blame her trying to escape. It’s a natural extension of her strategy to keep out of Pentonville. He knows she’s not mentally ill. Sonny says they have to get her out asap, but Doc says that might not be possible now.

Ava tells Nelle and Michael that she’s glad the chaos of the other night didn’t harm them. Nelle says they bounced back, and got married there. Sam comes by, and asks how Carly is, and Michael says she’s not allowed visitors. Michael gets a text from Chase to meet him in the park. He makes the excuse of a work thing. When he’s gone, Nelle asks Ava not to bring up Carly around Michael. It’s clear she’s not getting the help she needs. Who knows when they’ll see her next, if ever?

Mary Pat asks if Carly is excited. Dr. Lazarus has quite the afternoon in store. Carly says Doc’s name, and Mary Pat says he’s not available. It wouldn’t matter anyway. She had a long talk with the director, and they agreed they’re not getting through. Her treatment is overdue, but it won’t be long now. Try to relax. Before she knows it, she’ll feel like a new woman. She won’t be able to hurt anyone. Carly sees Nelle in the room.

Brad says the baby’s not due until August, and Alexis says, baby’s aren’t known for keeping schedules. She asks if he wants to know if it’s a boy or girl. Brad says Lucas should be there, but Alexis tells him that Lucas just went into surgery. She says congratulations; it’s a son. She’s going to meet with the birth mother’s lawyer. She tells him to clear his schedule and get the car seat in.

Michael meets Chase. He tells Michael the car is keyed up and ready to go. Is he? He asks if Michael is having second thoughts. Michael says his mother was put in an asylum, and she’s trying to kill him. Chase says she’s carrying his child. They can wait until after the baby comes. Michael says they need to put plan in motion right now.

Nelle tells Ava to consider this her notice. She won’t be back to work. She’s going to stay home and raise the baby. Ava adds, and spend Michael’s money. Nelle says, her money. Everything has gone her way so far; Ava’s too. Ava says not to mistake for an ally. Nelle gets a text. She asks Ava, why so unfriendly? Carly said she had help, and she made herself an accomplice when she stole the blanket. Carly is a raving lunatic about a blanket no one saw. It’s too late to back out. Like it or not, they’re in this together.

Doc tells Sonny there was a release on the horizon, but Carly escaped. He almost had the judge convinced, but she took matters into her own hands. And there’s no getting around she assaulted a nurse. Sonny says she’s fine, and complains about Diane having to convince the judge for five minutes with her client. He wants someone to tell her that she’s not alone. Doc says he’ll see what he can do. There’s a chance they’ll reassign her to a different doctor. Sonny respects him. He’s never failed their family before; don’t fail them now.

Carly sits, barely conscious. Imaginary Nelle says she came to keep Carly company; she must be lonely. Don’t worry about Michael. She’ll take care of him. Carly says, no.

Mary Pat talks to someone, telling them, here’s the workspace. She says don’t expect much; they’re heavily medicates, and probably can’t do more than fingerprint. It’s Franco, and he tells her he’ll figure it out. He’s had bad cases before.

Brad tells Julian he’s always been the cynical one, but he lowered his guard, even convincing Lucas to decorate the perfect nursery. They’ve had it ready for weeks. The baby can sleep there tonight. Their son. Alexis says someone wants to meet him, and a nurse brings the baby in.

Chase tells Nelle that he rigged the car to crash. They’ll fail if he suspects. Then they can’t be together and it’s all for nothing. She say she’ll have him take her on an errand, and then send him far enough away for Chase’s contraption to work. He’ll lose control of the car. Problems solved.

At the Quartermaines, Ava thinks it’s time proper conversation with Michael, about his mother and new wife. He doesn’t want to talk to her. She tried to have Mike committed. She says she was protecting her child. He would have done the same. She says when Carly interrupted the wedding, she suggested Nelle wasn’t acting alone. It was pretty obvious Carly was talking about her.

Sonny goes to the station. He tells Jordan that he heard from Diane, and doesn’t understand why Carly is allowed no visitors. Jordan says it’s only temporary until the adjust her treatment. He say she doesn’t need any, and she’s stuck in that snake pit with no one to help her.

Carly tells Nelle to go away. Nelle tells her that she’ll be old and grey by the time Sonny and Jason get her out. Maybe they’ve forgotten her, or don’t care. Face reality; she’s in it for the long haul. No one is coming. Franco says, Carly?

Chase gives Nelle last minute instructions. They can only safely go fifteen miles total. Then the steering will lock and the brakes will fail. He tells her she can still back out. She says Michael is pretending to care, and setting her up to take her baby. Michael has to die.

Ava tells Michael, whatever entity exists between Carly and Nelle has nothing to do with her. He asks if hiring her was a coincidence, and Ava says she did it for hi child’s sake. He says he’s not the one to worry about; his mother is a different story. Ava says she seems to have long road ahead.

Elizabeth tells Jason how much Jake enjoyed spending time with him and Drew. They’re both important to him; so is Franco. If Jason can get along with Drew, and Drew with Franco, maybe he and Franco can get along. Jason excuses himself. He needs to talk to Doc. Doc tells him there could be additional cause for concern.

Fantasy Nelle says it’s getting crowded in the room. Carly shakes her head. Franco says he’s as surprised to be there as she is to see him. A bleeding heart gave him an art therapy grant. Nelle asks what’s worse, getting a visit from Franco or being left to rot. Carly asks if Nelle is there. He asks if she wants the doctor or Mary Pat, and she says Mary Pat keeps giving her drugs. Franco says if she wants to express her feelings sin a safe space, that’s what art is for. She says he has to get her out of there.

Brad picks up the baby. Julian films while he talks to the baby and introduces himself. He tells him about Poppa Lucas being a doctor. He’s afraid he’ll break the baby, and Julian tell him that he’ll be fine. If there’s a situation they can’t handle, they have an army of friends and family to help. Brad asks Alexis when they can be sure the baby won’t be taken back. Julian asks what the chances of that are.

Alexis says it’s very rare. They have more pressing matters, like a name. Brad say they’d chosen Cher for a girl. Both short for Cheryl, for Lucas’s mom, and after Cher. They were talking about how a month can seem like a long while, and thought of Wiley, because they knew he’d be worth it all the while. Julian welcomes Wiley Cooper Jones to the world. Brad asks if Julian wants to hold him.

Carly tells Franco to tell Sonny and Jason to break her out. Mary Pat appears, and asks if there’s a problem. Franco says Carly asked for shade of pencil he didn’t bring. Mary Pat takes him into the hall, and tells him to be careful. The patients are medicated, but violent. And stay clear of that one. Franco says, Carly? Mary Pat asks if he knows her, and he says they’ve dealt with one another. He says they need to rejigger her meds; she’s no herself. Mary Pat says she’s better than when she got there. Soon, she’ll be right as rain. Fake Nelle shows Carly a knife, saying she’ll have a lot of fun with this. Carly says, stay away. Mary Pat says, looks like class over, and says what did they tell Carly about moving without permission?

Sonny tells Jordan that Carly isn’t sick. Jordan says, legally, she is. It’s out of her reach. Sonny says Nelle set her up. Jordan tells him knowing isn’t proving. Her conviction will be overturned only when Michael and Chase get the proof. If it’s going to happen, it will happen tonight.

Nelle finds Michael and Ava talking. She thought Ava was having lunch with Griff, but Ava says he had to cancel. The downside of dating a doctor. She came over to deliver Nelle’s final paycheck. Michael looks surprised, and Ava says it’s lovely that she’s going to devote all her time to her family; she’ll be missed at the gallery. Ava leaves, and Michael asks where Nelle has been. She says she ran into Chase, and he made a last pitch for a reunion. Michael says he shouldn’t be harassing her, but she says he knows where she stands. She meant her vows when she said them.

Doc tells Jason that the director at Ferncliff put Dr. Lazarus in in charge. Apparently, Doc isn’t doing his job at healing an already sane patient. He says Lazarus’s methods are controversial. He’s revised a technique that’s generally out of favor – electroconvulsive therapy. Carly is already scheduled for her first treatment.

Carly says she doesn’t belong there, and Mary Pat says, yet here she is. She’ll feel better when she’s adjusted to treatment. It’s time to see Dr. Lazarus, and move on to something new.

Jason asks Doc when Carly is scheduled, but all he knows is it’s sometime today. Jason asks what it will do to her, but Doc says it’s hard to say. That brand of treatment is a last resort. It’s for the truly lost who are beyond all other hope.

Franco tells Elizabeth that his time at Ferncliff was cut short. He doesn’t think he can help the poor souls there. Jason hears him.

Mary Pat tells Carly soon she’ll have a whole new outlook on life. She takes Carly down the hall, saying Carly’s life will be so much better – and hers. She tells Carly to pick up her feet. Carly passes a patient that looks like Doc, who tells her, SOS. There’s been speculation that the mystery patient is really Doc’s twin brother Ryan. He’s supposed to be dead, but you know how it goes. I’m still expecting Faison to pop up again.

Julian holds the baby, saying, such a miracle, and Brad tells the baby to say grandpa. He takes a picture and sends it to Julian. It’s time for him to take his son home. Julian hopes to be somebody his grandson will want to know. He tells the baby his grandfather loves him so much, and always will. He hands the baby back to Brad. Alexis says she’ll be in touch. Brad thanks her and leaves. Julian looks at the picture and wonders when he’ll hold the baby again. Alexis tells him to keep doing what he’s doing, and maybe he’ll see his grandson all the time.

Nelle packs her bag, but tells Michael she’s missing the glycerin lollipops that were recommended. Michael suggest picking them up tomorrow, but Nelle says what if she goes into labor tonight? They can pick some up in Sawyer now. Michael thinks it’s a little far, but she says, it’s worth every mile.

Back at the station, Chase says he met with Nelle, and the plan has been put in motion. He had a hidden camera in Michael’s car, so they can watch in real time. The car is set to lose control after he gets out. The rest is up to Michael.

Michael tells Nelle that Sawyer is in the opposite direction from the hospital. She says it’s only a few miles. By the time he’s done, she’ll be ready for him to pick her up. He asks how can he refuse her anything, and they leave.

Tomorrow, Maxie asks Nina how she got roped in, Jason asks Franco about Ferncliff, and Carly gets her treatment.

Southern Charm – Reunion Part Two

Ashley says she’s about to walk into lion’s den. She’s going to speak her truth, even though it’s gotten her into trouble. It’s hard for her. Violins play in my head, and Austen says, here we go.

Andy wants to talk about Kathryn disappearing. He asks if she was surprised at everyone’s concern, and she says, it’s never been that way. HE asks at what age she realized she was struggling with depression. She tells him when she was eighteen, she was working politics. The men objectified her, and she self-medicated. She talks about going off the medication she’s on now, saying she doesn’t like depending on things other than herself to be normal. She’s glad it came out on the show, since a lot of people won’t admit to needing help. They still suffer the stigma of being medicated, but they shouldn’t feel ashamed. Cameran talks about suffering from anxiety, and that she needed medication. Craig says he had Kathryn’s back in times of conflict, but he wasn’t there all the time, and feels embarrassed. Anyone who’s gone through the bullsh*t Kathryn has would probably end up having something. Kathryn says she’s evolved, and she recognized they’re there for her, and it means a lot. Craig says she masked it a lot. Shep can relate to the depression part, and is happy to see the support.

Andy talks about Shep moving to a quieter, gentler area, where the sand is softer to face-plant in. They discuss the difference between a blackout and a brownout. Shep says with a brownout, you get mental snapshots of the night, where in a blackout, it’s what the hell happened? Austen says anything was better than what Shep was doing. Cameran says he’s still out and about, and showed her all the women on his phone. Andy asks how many times a week he goes out, and he says, it depends. Austen thinks four to six. Cameran is surprised he’s never gotten anyone pregnant. Andy asks about birth control, and Shep says he’s iffy. Cameran asks if he’s clean, and he says of course. Craig hopes they’re not jinxing him.

Relationshep is talked about, and Andy says he was surprised when Shep chose the twenty-two-year-old. It doesn’t seem like he really wants a committed relationship, but there’s no crime in that. He says he sees clichés, and falls into the trap. We flash back to Shep’s dinner party, and he and Craig attempting to grill. Andy asks about Shep’s knee, and he says he’s good. Andy tells him there are lots of people hoping for a Shep and Kathryn relationship. Shep does look back and wonder what if things happened differently. Andy says they have great chemistry. Shep says, physically, and they have a lot of fun. He says she’s really good, and Kathryn thanks him for the endorsement. We find out they’ve hooked up five times, and they talk about the time after Kensie was born at the Palace Hotel. Andy says, the night is young, and Kathryn says it’s an annual thing. Andy calls it a reunion hook-up.

Andy says Shep told his mother that he was working on becoming less angry, and he says he didn’t want to become an angry old guy. We flash back to his conversation with his mother. Shep says he realized he wasn’t his normally congenial, happy self, and hates being mean-spirited. We see a clip of him telling Austen he doesn’t need more friends, and Austen saying he’ll stay away then. Shep says it was like living on Bourbon Street. Andy says he got heat for calling out Austen for partying, and we flash back to Shep talking to Chelsea. A viewer says he can’t seem to pass up the opportunity to one up Austen, and Shep admits to still being salty. He’s asked if jealousy is a factor, and Shep says Austen had texted him about missing an epic night, and he came across badly. He says, talking someone else down is the worst move in the world. A viewer gets why Chelsea wanted Austen to stand up to Shep. Andy asks if it’s about Austen not standing up to Shep, or more about Austen, and Chelsea says it was more the standing up. Austen says it caused a serious rift. Shep says he apologized. He didn’t make himself look better, and squashed anything he could have had with Chelsea. He thinks they were both trying to win her over, and butted heads. Shep suggests Chelsea doesn’t have to tell everything he says, but Chelsea says he was painting himself as a choirboy.

Austen still isn’t working, and Andy asks if anyone there with a penis, besides him, has any ambition. Naomie says they have an ambition to not work. Andy asks about the status of Austen’s beer. Austen says it’s in the branding stage, and he’s pitching it to distributors. The name is going to be Trop Hop, because it has a tropical bent. We all like it. Andy says everyone loves his parents, who pop up on social media. His mom is no-nonsense, and his dad used to be in the FBI. Andy asks how much beer Austen would have to sell to actually pick up a check. He claims Chelsea grabs the check like lightening. She doesn’t feel she’s one of those girls who has to be paid for, but it’s how he went about it, and imitates his feeble attempt of, no, let me get it. Chelsea says not everyone is fortunate enough to have a family that can front them. It’s frustrating, because all the opportunities are right there; just pick something. Austen wishes it was that simple.

Backstage, Ashley thinks about what she’s going to say, and how she’s going to be the best person she can be. The hairdresser looks bored.

Andy says until she finds a manly man, Chelsea is content hanging with her main dog Tyson. We see pictures, and Chelsea says he’s one of Michael Vick’s dogs that were rescued. He’s been used as bait. I’m disgusted (no bold type for Vick), but make aww noises at the pictures. Andy asks if she’s gotten more clients because of the show, and she says she has. She talks about how she hears everything that goes on, and that a client saw Thomas and Ashley outside a restaurant arguing to the point of him throwing leftover food at her. He was saying she’s going to send him back to prison. Andy says after visiting her childhood home, Chelsea got emotional. She says her world was turned upside down after her stepdad died. We flash back to them visiting the house. Andy asks if she seeks out good providers because of the lifestyle her stepfather gave them. She says she learned to provide for herself. She looks back and sees what her mom went through, and doesn’t want to put herself in the same situation. A viewer thinks she sends Austen mixed messages, and Andy asks if they’ve hooked up since they stopped dating. The answer is no, and Andy moves on to Austen getting back with Victoria after Chelsea rebuffed him. He says it felt good to feel wanted, and she wanted to be with him; why push that away? Shep says Victoria is a fun time girl, and like one of the guys.

Andy rudely asks if Austen and Shep have ever been with the same woman on the same night. That’s a no, and Andy says a threesome doesn’t mean you’re gay. He says a lot of viewers thought Chelsea’s behavior toward Austen on the boat was inappropriate. She says people see a glimpse of something on social media, and their minds go off in different directions. She insists it was innocent, and I’m on her side. Shep says Austen hugging Chelsea at the party looked sultry and wonderful. Kathryn says they have natural chemistry, and Chelsea admits it looked flirty when she watched it. Andy says viewers love them as couple, and compare them to Ross and Rachel from Friends. He asks if they’ll ever get back together, but they’re both dating other people. Chelsea says he’s a friend; it’s not like that. She’s going out with someone who’s not from Charleston, so no one has met him yet.

It’s time for Ashley to join the group. Andy says Ashley might double-down. Naomie says triple-down. Andy asks her how painful the last four hours was, and she says she thought of running a few times. Shep says they’re at the finish line. Everyone trickles in, and someone wishes they had a water gun. Naomie crosses herself.

Andy describes Ashley as having traded scrubs for Chanel. Getting Thomas to marry her was a full-time job, and she spent her free time poking the mama bear. He asks if she’s nervous, and asks how her experience was watching the season. She thinks if people understood her humor, it would be different. She tends to poke and tease and get a rise out of people, and wishes it wouldn’t be taken so seriously. Andy says viewers on social media are concerned about her weight loss. She says the pressure of filming made her nervous. She put pressure on herself and it created stress. Andy says they haven’t been filming for a while. She says there are also the allegations. People are saying she has anorexia, and is a villain. This didn’t happen overnight. Andy asks about when she first met Thomas. Ashley says his first question was what she did for a living, and he told her that his sister is a nurse. She thought it was nice of him to be interested in hearing about her career. She thought he had depth. Andy asks what he’s like as a boyfriend. The words alternately boring and crazy come to mind, but she says he’s romantic; he takes care of her. Everyone laughs. She says she likes scaring and pranking him, and putting fake bugs around to keep it fun. Andy wonders how he’s doing in light of the investigation. She says it’s been humbling, and she’s seeing a new Thomas. He wants to stay in and keep under the radar. He’s been softer, more sensitive, kinder, and more supportive. Everyone wants to be your friend when you’re on top, and she’s not leaving. Andy asks if she expects Thomas to be cleared, and she says of course. There have been no charges, just allegations. It used to be innocent until proven guilty, but now it’s the other way around. I have to admit, she’s right there, but I doubt it applies in Thomas’s case. He acts like a full-blown nut sometimes.

Andy says Kathryn admitted to Craig that she and Thomas hooked up after the season 4 reunion. We flash back to Thomas winking at her during the reunion. Andy asks if anyone is surprised, and Naomie says it’s a tradition. Kathryn says it’s an annual thing. Andy points out Thomas was dating Ashley in May, and hooked up with Kathryn in June. Kathryn says she had no idea he was dating Ashley. Ashley says he told her in July; he doesn’t lie. Ha! He probably told her because he knew she was going to find out, since all of them knew.

Andy says the first time Ashley met Kathryn was at Shep’s birthday party. Ashley said she was physically afraid of Kathryn based on what she’d heard. Kathryn says she’s never touched anyone in her life; weird. Andy asks Kathryn what she thought of Ashley, and Kathryn says she thought Ashley was normal… ish. We flash back to Ashley saying she has nothing but respect for Kathryn. Kathryn says Ashley met her children before they met. Ashley says Thomas has full custody, and it was just in passing. Kathryn asks how long did Thomas know her before she met the kids, and Ashley says a week. Andy asks is Thomas and Ashley had sex in the bathroom at the party. She says, no, and we flash back to them going into the bathroom together. Everyone is laughing. Shep says it’s cool, but Ashley says Thomas won’t do it anywhere but in bed. Kathryn mumbles that’s not true. Andy can’t think of another reason to be going into the bathroom together, but Ashley insists they were just trying to get private time away from the cameras. She has more class than that. Shep says he doesn’t have any.

Viewer Loretta from Akron tweets that Ashley is completely committed to getting engaged. We flash back to the million times she brought up rings and/or weddings. Andy says if he asked today, would she say yes. She hesitates, then says she’s not there yet, like any of us believe that. Andy asks what changed; the investigation? She says, not at all, but once she started working, she realized she should pump the brakes and enjoy dating. Everyone thought she got caught up in the money. Andy tells her that Tinsley Mortimer tweeted that she wants to be T-Rav’s widow. Ashley says she can meet someone with more money back home, and dated guys own age with more. It’s just a stereotype, and she was attracted to an accomplished man who works hard for what he’s got. Another viewer asks how Ashley felt when Thomas was flirting up a storm with Kathryn, and wonders what she’s doing with that d-bag. Ashley insists it didn’t bother her; she was right there. Shep thought it was awkward. He said, I love you to Kathryn in French. Not only that – and this is me saying it, not Shep – it was the familiar way of saying it, je t’aime. Ashley says she feels secure in the relationship. Shep is like, okay, and we flash back to a couple of jealous moments from Ashley. She says she knows he’s coming home with her. Andy says she had to know it would upset Kathryn to post the Halloween picture of her with the children. She says Thomas posted it, and Kathryn could have been there; she was invited. Kathryn asks why she would want to go trick-or-treating with her and Thomas, and it should have been Thomas’s place to invite her, not Ashley’s. Ashley claims she could have stayed at the house and pass out candy. Andy asks if Kathryn believes that, and she says, no. The rest of the world agrees.

Andy asks if Ashley has any regrets about spending $10K of Thomas’s money. I thought he said $20K when they were at the polo match. Ashley tries to pretend she didn’t know he was paying, even though she used his credit card. Then she claims she was going to bring the clothes back, but Thomas insisted she keep them because Patricia approved. Kathryn says, despite how it looks, Thomas is beyond frugal. She’s never seen him do that. Ashley says maybe just with her. Kathryn guesses she just wasn’t deserving of nice things. Ashley says he gave her two, and Kathryn says like she didn’t give them to him; nice. Andy mentions how Patricia had rooted for the relationship between Thomas and Ashley, and asks what’s going on now? Ashley says she has no relationship with Patricia. In the beginning, Patricia told her, maybe it was selfish, but she wanted them together just so Kathryn couldn’t get back together with Thomas. Ashley’s biggest regret is going shopping with her, when should have gone with Kathryn. Everyone looks confused, including me. Andy asks what happened to turn Patricia around. Ashley seems to think it started with social media systematically sabotaging her relationship with Patricia. She’s alluding to someone saying bad things about her, and Thomas targeting Patricia in return. Shep says Patricia isn’t in charge of what other people say. She had been good to Thomas. Andy asks if they’re speaking now, but Shep says, it’s over.

Andy says the group packed up their emotional baggage to take a trip to Hilton Headache. Shep explains how he walked into a glass door while busy talking smack. Craig’s finger is brought into the conversation, and Shep says it’s mangled because Craig waited too long to go to the hospital. Moving on to what we’ve been waiting for. Ashley was insistent about being invited to Saint’s second birthday party. A viewer ask on what planet she thought she as being appropriate. Ashley says it could have been any party; she just wanted to be included. Andy says they made the effort to include her on the trip to Hilton Head, but she became feverishly obsessed with the birthday party. We flash back to what’s starting to eclipse LuAnn’s fall in the bushes, and I say, nasty out loud. Andy said there was an overwhelming response, and reads comments, including one that calls Ashley literally the devil. We flash back to more of Ashley making a fool of herself. Chelsea says she cried when they left. She can’t imagine hearing what Ashley said to Kathryn. Naomie says she was holding Kathryn’s hand, and she was trembling. Andy asks how Kathryn kept her composure. She says her kids are more important than responding. Cameran says she wasn’t there, but her reaction as a viewer was that she couldn’t believe it. Andy brings up Chelsea saying Thomas and Ashley weren’t allowed back in the house if Kathryn was uncomfortable. Kathryn says she appreciated that, but Thomas’s reaction was scary. Chelsea says she was terrified he’d jump the bench in the ferry. We see a clip of Thomas being a nutjob. Andy wonders why the guys didn’t react like Southern gentlemen, and Austen says he did. Chelsea says when Austen stood up, she thought there was going to be a fight. Cameran adds that he seemed comfortable screaming. Kathryn says it’s the real Thomas. When he becomes unhinged, the façade falls, and his eyes turn black. Ashley tells her that Thomas says the same things about her. I find that highly doubtful. Cameran says a man should never approach a woman like that. No one should speak to anyone like that. Craig says he’s never seen anyone talk to a girl like that. Cameran thinks Ashley is scared of him, but Ashley insists she’s not. Andy says she seemed to be smirking when Thomas got in Chelsea’s face on the boat, and asks why she called them enablers, and Ashley says they should hold Kathlyn accountable. Kathryn says she’s been holding herself accountable for years, and Ashley is trying to discredit her by calling her friends enablers. Andy says she takes random drug tests, and Ashley asks how many she’s taken. Kathryn says she doesn’t know, and Ashley claims it’s four, and she barely made the last one. They stayed late for her. Kathryn says she was working, and Ashley says she’s lucky she made it, or it would count as a fail. She would have been there early. Kathryn says Ashley is really out of touch with the fact she’s a complete a-hole. Ashley’s head explodes, and everyone laughs. I laugh loudest.

A viewer says they were scared for Chelsea when Ashley kept repeating name on the staircase. Was she freaked out? Chelsea says she was, and it was a horrible thing to say. We see a clip of Ashley saying giving birth doesn’t make you a mother. Ashley agrees she was being a bitch. Chelsea is concerned that there’s no remorse over her outburst. An apology would have smoothed things over. Craig says he thought they wouldn’t come back. Shep says it seemed to embolden them, like it was them against the world. Andy asks if Ashley regrets saying anything, and she says, absolutely. She can’t defend herself; her behavior is indefensible… and scary. She should have pulled Kathryn aside for a private conversation if she had issues. Then, in blaming everything except her own black heart, she says she picked the worst time and place. Kathryn is glad she did what she did. It showed her true colors. Ashley gets stuck on the wrong time and place. Craig says, what about the content? She says she shouldn’t have brought it up, but it was how she was feeling. Kathryn says what hurts is that she’s not sorry for what she said. Cameran says, it was a backhanded apology. Andy asks if Ashley believes what said, and she says she does. Andy says that viewers think Thomas was selling her out in his interviews. Craig says he compared her to a dog chasing a chew toy, and we see him saying that – almost. Andy is surprised it’s not a bone of contention, and Ashley says Thomas is stuck between a rock and a hard place. Shep tells her, don’t be a rock. Cameran mentions how Thomas used Kathryn to bait her. Cameran says she screwed up, but she doesn’t think Ashley is aware of it. Ashley says Thomas’s stupid comments are entertainment for her. Craig says she’s like the old Kathryn, and Ashley says no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. Kathryn says she does. Cameran says Charleston is a small town, and it’s common knowledge their relationship is volatile. Shep says if she acted that way when she knew cameras were one her, Lord only knows. Chelsea had mentioned Thomas was seen throwing food at her outside a restaurant. Ashley says that she wanted to leave, and had handed him to food. She was upset, and being a brat. Chelsea and Craig both says it’s a red flag. Cameran wonders what it says about a man who talks poorly about the mother of his children. He said horrible things about Ashley to everyone. Ashley says a lot has changed, and Austen says she’s in denial. Cameran says she’s lying to herself. Ashley asks if it’s an intervention, and Chelsea says they’re trying to help. Andy asks if it doesn’t give her pause that they’ve all seen it before. Kathryn feels bad watching her; being her from years ago. Cameran says he’s not a nice person. Ashley says we all have bad moments; a lot changed. Craig says they’re looking out for her, but she says they’re wrong. Cameran says she should give herself a nice life while she can.

Andy says it took five years for Patricia to reach out the olive branch, and invite Kathryn to her Winter Wonderland Ball. Now that she’s a mother, Kathryn thinks it started when she told Whitney fall on a knife. We see that clip. Andy asks if they’ve been in touch since the ball. Kathryn says Patricia requested her presence when they crossed paths at a restaurant. She apologizes, saying she’s seen Kathryn’s transform. She feels bad for saying what she did without getting to know Kathryn. Cameran can confirm that Patricia is genuinely sorry, and looks at Kathryn in a new light. Andy brings up the rumor about Ashley being an escort, and says it’s a serious allegation. Austen says he has no problem with it, because, her behavior. His roommate has friends in Santa Barbara who might have mentioned it Ashley says that’s disgusting, and shame on him. I still say she isn’t put together enough mentally or emotionally to be a high-end escort. Or even a streetwalker. Austen says if it was his girlfriend being talked about, he’d want to know. Ashley says the rumor came from a person Thomas rejected. Kathryn says she heard Thomas signed an NDA (non-disclosure agreement), and it’s like a business relationship. Ashley calls her a liar, and Craig thinks Thomas is scared she’ll testify against him. He let her get too clse, and wants to keep her there. She says she’d never do that because she has a conscience. Andy is surprised they haven’t broken up, and she says they see each other’ heart. Kathryn thinks Thomas doesn’t trust she won’t go to the media, and she might be crazy enough to threaten him. Ashley says, it takes one to know one, because we’re ten. Andy says they seemed on the verge of breaking up a bunch of times, and we see clips of that. Craig says he was about to call it quits right in front of them. Ashley says she wasn’t happy with her own life, but she’s very secure now. And they’re not invited to the wedding. Everyone laughs, and she asks if Andy will officiate

Andy says she went outside at the ball to apologize, but it quickly tuned into a nasty brawl. Ashley says she had pure intentions, and Kathryn asks what changed. She said worse things than she did in Hilton Head. We revisit that. Any asks if she believes Kathryn is nothing more than an egg donor. Ashley says she apologized, and felt attacked. Kathryn says Ashley was the one doing the attacking, and Ashley says Kathryn followed her. Kathryn says Ashley walked away. She tells Ashley, screw her for saying it. It’s not okay to say to any mother ever; it’s beyond disrespectful. She feels badly that Ashley doesn’t see it. She hopes if Ashley is ever a mother she learns this. She’s around Kathryn’s children, and saying things about and to her is disturbing. Ashley tries defending herself, saying Kathryn lost custody. Kathryn says Ashley has known her less than a year. In that time, has there been anything she’s done to bring Ashley to the point of saying she’s nothing more than an egg donor, or is she judging Kathryn by things told to her by Thomas about the past. Ashley says, yes, but she would love to make it right. Andy asks what it would take to convince her, and Ashley wants a private conversation. Shep asks if she wants to hear Kathryn’s side of the story. Ashley says, no, but they could relate. Huh? Craig seems to think Ashley was brainwashed, since she can’t see the truth the entire group is giving her. Andy gives it up to Kathryn. It would have caused him to get physical. He doesn’t know how she walked away. Kathryn says watching it, she was able to confirm that she’s gotten to know herself and her self-worth, and act accordingly. As a mother, she doesn’t want Ashley around her children. She’s unkind, hateful, and sadistic. Unfortunately, if she has to be the one to deliver that message to her this way, she’ll do it. She’s done. Ashley whines that she wants to make amends, and Kathryn suggests she focus on loving herself. Andy thanks Ashley, and says he’ll her see her at the wedding. Well played, Kathryn. Well played.

Ashley departs, and everyone agrees, what a day. Craig says, it was different, and k wonders how naïve anyone can be. They all agree Thomas won’t like it.

Ashley says where she goes from here is a hard question. Her judgment was in question, but they’re not living her life. They’re not with Thomas 24/7. Maybe she was brainwashed in the beginning. This is what she gets for judging Kathryn. Maybe she wasn’t clear enough, but she stood by what she said. It’s hard with no support. She thinks Thomas deserves it too. He’s her best friend, and she’s not ready to throw in the towel. Despite what they say, she’s happy, and she’s not going anywhere.

It’s the final moments. Andy says through the ebbs and flows, and Hurricane Ashley who took the wind out of everyone’s sails, the friendship is solid between everyone. He asks if Craig thinks he’ll ever be friends with Naomie. Craig says if he could go back, he would change everything.  Naomie asks him to just respect her relationship and be happy for her. Shep confirms his friendship with Kathryn, and says she knows if she needs anything, he’ll drop everything. He’s also realized he’s the oldest one there. Cameran calls him, the elder. Andy asks if becoming a mom has given Cameran more patience with the guys, and she says, absolutely. Austen and Chelsea are still great friends, and happy about each other’s new relationship. Andy asks for a round of applause for Kathryn, who came out on top, showing her restraint. We find out Austen’s beer will be out late summer/early fall. He still has a couple more hoops to jump through.

Cups of Austen’ beer is brought out, with a Coke for Kathryn, who jokingly asks if Andy means the Coca Cola kind. Andy asks Shep to make the toast, as the elder statesman. He says five years ago, no one could have dreamt this, and who knows how many more? Cheers to those who wish us well, and all who don’t, can rot in hell. Everyone loves the beer. I’ll miss them.

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

For the first time in the history of this blog (where is Gordon Ramsay to say that?), because life got in the way, I wasn’t able to get through editing. And trust me, even I can barely read my shorthand. I will be getting Thursday’s General Hospital episode and this week’s Southern Charm (which was great) out asap. But right now, sleep calls…

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Valentin tells Nina the stable master had a family emergency, so he has to take care of the horses himself. He’ll say hello to Lumiere for her. When he’s gone, Nina calls Obrecht, but it goes to voicemail. Nina says, put down whatever torture device you’re using and answer the phone.

Peter talks about what’s important in life as he dictates the book, ending with, the first time a mother reached out to hold her baby. Why, Octavian thought, do we never understand life’s value and true meaning until we’re about to lose it all? Obrecht calls it drivel. She says it’s supposed to be a brilliant sequel. His fate depends on it. Peter says they both know how it ends. When he finishes the story, she finishes him. She says, back to work. He has a deadline; no more stalling. No one is coming to his rescue.

Curtis meets Sam and Jordan at the MetroCourt. Curtis says they have footage that might prove how Peter vanished. Sam says, it’s more like he didn’t have a choice.

Stella sees mike Sonny and Mike at the hospital. Sonny says they’re waiting for a prescription. Mike says Griff suggested he take tango lessons, but he needs a dance partner. Sonny says Mike is an incurable flirt, and Stella hopes they never find a cure. She loves to tango, and Mike says he has himself a dance partner. Stella leaves to put a rush on the prescription. Sonny asks if Mike is okay, and he says he was just kidding around with Stella. It would be nice to have one last tango with someone that lovely. Maybe tonight at the wedding. He tells Sonny that he’s not losing a son, but gaining a daughter.

Alexis arrives at the Quartermaine’s. Michael thanks her for coming on short notice. She’s surprised he didn’t call Diane, but he says she’s his father’s lawyer. He’s his own man, and thought he’d get his own lawyer. She says, as opposed to the ELQ army he has. He says, that’s business, this is personal. He wants her to draw up a will. It wasn’t what she was expecting to hear from a groom on his wedding day. He says he wants to get it out of the way – the sooner the better. With the baby almost here, he can’t put it off. After today, everything changes. He wants to put the happiness and welfare of his family first. He wants to make sure the person who means the most is taken care of after he’s gone. Nelle listens from around the corner.

Mike talks about dancing with Sonny’s mother at their wedding. The family didn’t approve of him, so they eloped. He remembers someone saying, you may kiss the bride, and he did. Sonny’s mom said he was a terrific kisser. They had first dance. Adela loved to dance, and when he held her… He’s never forgotten how much he loved her. He says, when you find that one person… Sonny knows what he means.

Jordan tells Curtis and Sam there’s no way to tell if it’s Peter under the laundry, or who’s pushing the cart. Sam tells her to check out the shoes. They seem to be sensible work shoes, but look closer – a heel. Jordan assumes they’ve traced the brand. Sam says there’s only one website that sells them. Jordan says now they need a face to do with the shoes.

Peter asks Obrecht if Nina is coming back. He’s hungry, tired, and in pain; it’s not conducive to creativity. Obrecht thinks she has half a caramel stashed in her bag, but he says he doesn’t need a piece of candy; he needs Nina. Obrecht asks if she’s his muse, and he says she’s less likely to do him bodily harm. Obrecht shows him a riding crop, and says, instead of thinking of it as an instrument of pain, think of it as inspiration. He asks, what if Nina was arrested, and the police are on their way? She says it would be lucky for him. Her phone buzzes. She says it’s probably someone trying to sell healthcare, but checks it.

Nina finds Valentin at the docks, and tells him that he can’t go home. She got a call from environmental department, and they’re checking for West Nile virus on Spoon Island. He says it sounds a panicked bureaucrat afraid of losing their job, but she says it’s serious. She doesn’t think he should go there, and says it’s a good thing Charlotte is staying at Lulu’s. She tells him to stay at the MetroCourt; she’ll drive him. He says for someone whose divorcing him, she’s very concerned about his welfare, and asks if there’s another reason. An officer comes out. He says he’s been trying to get ahold of Valentin, and puts up a sign saying the launch is closed, and tells Valentin that Spoon Island is quarantined until further notice.

Sam tells Curtis they can cross Maxie off the list. She was in the hospital when Peter disappeared. He ask if she knows someone who would do it as a favor. She says, only Jason, but he’d tell her. He says Nina has the funds to hire someone to do her dirty work. Sam reminds him that she hired them to prove Valentin was an accessory. He says that leaves one woman who has the means, opportunity, and motive. Obrecht.

Peter says he warned Obrecht that the story might not end the way she wans it to. She says no one knows they’re at the stables. He says unless Nina let it slip. She only wanted justice. Obrecht says that’s what she wants, but Peter says, she wants revenge. Nina knows it’s wrong. Maybe in a moment of clarity, decency, and sanity, she confessed. Obrecht’s phone dings. The text says, West Nile detected. Obrecht says Nina managed to divert all curious parties away. She suggests they pick up where they left off.

Jordan sees Stella at the hospital. She’s looking for TJ, and Stella says he’s spending his spare time in medical library. Jordan tells Stella that she and Curtis would like her help in planning the wedding.

Mike asks Sonny what’s wrong. Sonny says, nothing, but Mike doesn’t buy it. He has that concerned look, like when he’s worried. He asks if something is wrong with the wedding, and Sonny says he might say that. Mike asks if the groom is getting cold feet.

Alexis tells Michael she’ll make a boilerplate, and when he gets back, they’ll fill in the blanks. She asks what’s the rush, and he says he wants to make sure the person he loves most will be completely taken care of. Alexis says she’ll make that happen. Go forth and get hitched. When he gets back. She’ll make sure his wishes are crystal clear. He says it’s pretty simple. He’s going to leave everything to his child. The sooner, the better. Alexis says, understood, and he thanks her for making it a priority

Stella tells Jordan that it’s early to be planning, especially without a date. Why not enjoy an old-fashioned courtship? Don’t spoil it. Jordan gets that they’ll never be best friends, but she and Curtis love each other, and they’re going to be married. It would mean a lot if she’d sit down to supper and plan the wedding with them. Stella agrees, but when Jordan is gone, she calls Shondra. She leaves a message, saying that she was thinking Shondra should visit. Curtis would love to see her. The sooner, the better (phrase of the day).

Curtis says it wouldn’t be the first time Obrecht crossed the line. Sam says she’s a doctor, and has access to sedatives. Sam says she was just with her at Maxie’s baby shower, and has a hard time believing yjr same woman celebrating her grandson’s birth is the one in the video. Curtis says maybe she’s upset that her grandson is without a father. She has a big ass motive that just got bigger. He thinks Nina knows or saw something. Either way, they’re talking to her.

Nina tells Valentin that he’s a refugee in a five-star hotel; boohoo. He says she cares about him, but she says Charlotte would be upset if he keeled over from West Nile. She has to deal with the magazine. He might have bought hem some time, but she has to provide real ads from real businesses with real products. Unless he wants her to be the laughing stock of the publishing industry and the entire world. He says she could have let him find out on his own, but instead, she raced to the docks. It could only mean one thing.

Nelle joins Michael, who wasn’t expecting to see her until the main event. He asks if she shouldn’t be getting dressed, and she asks if he loves her.

Nina tells Valentin, despite her non-positive feelings, she doesn’t want him walking into a mosquito hot zone. Human decency is the only reason. He says if he’s taking a suite there, they might find themselves next to each other. Curtis comes to the office, and Nina tells Valentin to go. Curtis tells Nina that he and Sam have a new theory. What can she tell him about Obrecht?

Peter dictates. A small glimmer of light, a symbol of hope. He drove into the night. The road long and dark stretching on forever. He stops and tells Obrecht she looks like needs rest. She says, when he’s dead. He says he was watching her, and she looks like she could almost be a mother, a mother in pain. She says that’s who she is, and don’t forget who caused it. He tells her, Cesar Faison. It was inflicted on him his whole life. She doesn’t seem like bad person. She asks if he’s developed Stockholm Syndrome. He says they’re going about the sequel wrong. It shouldn’t be about him. She says the first book was about him and his father. Why wouldn’t it be about him after his father’s demise? He says he left out a compelling character – her.

Jordan finds TJ, and tells him there’s been a stumbling block in planning the wedding. He assumes it’s Stella, but Jordan says she stepped up to the plate. The other hurdle is the bride needs someone to give her away. Speaking for the bride, she can’t think of anyone better than her son.

Stella tells Sonny the pharmacy is backed up, but their working on Mike’s prescription. Mike asks Sonny to go to the pharmacy and wait. Stella says he needs to get to a wedding, and she’s trying to avoid one. He asks if she means her nephew and the commissioner. He ask if she’s ever missed a funeral, and she says it’s her Christian duty to attend. He asks, then why deny seeing two people’s happiness?

Alexis sees Sonny, and tells him that she’ll accommodate Michael’s wishes. It’s a first to draft a will hours before a groom takes his vows.

Michael says of course he loves Nelle. Why is she doubting it? She says she put him through so much, and then the baby. He says it’s the best thing that ever happened to them. She loves him more than anything, but can’t live with the fact that he might think she’s using the baby to trap him. He says, he’s the one who proposed, and wanted to be married today. If anyone is trapping, it’s him. He says after they’re married, they’ll be so happy. He hugs her, and practically rolls his eyes.

Valentin reserves a suite on the executive level, and asks if they’re sure things will work out. Sam says she couldn’t help overhearing; it’s an occupational hazard. Valentin tells her about Spoon Island being quarantined tells her. Sam says, don’t worry. They don’t want anything to do with it anymore.

Nina asks Curtis if Obrecht is a person of interest. He says she has one hell of a motive. Other than Maxie, who has more reason to hate Peter than Nathan’s grieving mother? He asks if Nina has noticed any odd behavior. She says Obrecht is brilliant, but also a lunatic. She’d be suspicious if Obrecht acted normal. She needs to get back to work. Curtis says if she runs into Obrecht, they never had this conversation. She says, what conversation?

Jordan doesn’t want to put TJ on the spot if he’s uncomfortable. TJ says it’s not that. His dad’s been gone a long time. Like he told Stella, he thinks his dad would want them to be happy. She asks if that’s a yes.

Stella says Mike would understand if he knew the circumstances. There are many reasons why they’re all wrong for each other. He asks if they know reasons, and she says, they do, but want to go ahead anyway. Against reason, decency, and common sense. He says she’s been a good friend, so he’s giving it to her straight. He takes her hand, and says, life goes by in the blink of an eye. If two people are lucky enough to find love, they should grab it. Anyone who tries to take it away, is not doing their Christian duty. They’re robbing themselves of the most precious thing; time to love. He tells her not to make that mistake.

Sonny tells Alexis that Nelle’s last fiancé died before they got married. She thinks Michael’s too smart to take a chance. After they’re married, she’ll revisit the will and work out the details. She leaves, and Sonny says, that may be too late.

Nelle says she’ll see Michael at the chapel. He says he can’t wait. When he’s gone, Nelle calls the lawyer again. She has a quick question for a friend. she became sick with no will, and is terrified her husband and daughter won’t get anything. She asks what happens if someone dies with no will, Michael listens in.

Sam meets Curtis. He says Nina didn’t kidnap Peter, but she knows more than she’s telling. She couldn’t jump through enough hoops to avoid answering questions about Obrecht. Sam asks about the West Nile virus, and Curtis says it’s not there. She asks how much thinks Nina knows.

Nina thanks the officer, and gives him something for his time and expenses. He gives her a flyer from the theater troupe he’s in. They’re doing Bye, Bye Birdie in the park, and he’s playing Conrad. She asks him to leave he sign, and tells him to break a leg.

Valentin makes and appointment with Finn. He needs an infectious disease specialist as soon as possible.

Obrecht rejects Peter’s attempt at flattery. He says the entire story was only about the father and son; they need a mother. It’s time for a story not with a secondhand viewpoint, but her own words. She says no one ever asked about her. It was always Cesar, Cesar and Anna, Cesar and Robin. No one considered she might have story to tell. He says, now’s her chance. She says she’s not a writer, but he says neither was J.K. Rowling before she gave the world Harry Potter. He says pretend he’s the reader, and begin anywhere. Repeat after him, once upon a time… She says, there was a little girl that absolutely no one understood.

TJ tells Jordan, it’s a definite yes. He hopes the wedding is everything she and Curtis would want. She hugs him.

Sonny comes back. Stella says she stopped by to help his father, and he turned the tables and helped her instead. Mike says he still has a few surprises. She says, he certainly does, and tells him not to miss wedding. He says, her too. Outside, Stella calls Shondra again. She says, on second thought, it’s not a good time. She forgot to mention Curtis is getting married.

We see an empty desk chair. On the desk, the phone says a missed call from Stella.

Mike tells Sonny that he loves weddings. Who’s getting married?

Nelle says, so in New York state, if intestate, the spouse inherits everything? Her friend will be glad to hear that. Michael eavesdrops.

Tomorrow, Lulu asks Ned who gets married on Friday the 13^th, Carly wants out, and Nelle stabs Michael.

Southern Charm

The Winter Wonderland Ball is being set up and Patricia approves. Kathryn flips through Patricia’s book, The Art of Southern Charm.

Cameran visits Craig at his new house. She asks if he’s swept the floors since he moved in. He says yes, but she’s skeptical. She suggests he hire a cleaning service. He offers her something to drink, and she says she’ll take some wine if it’s not old. From the look on her face after taking a sip, I think it might be. He asks if the baby is awesome, and she shows him a picture. He thinks she’ll make a kickass mom. He’s waiting on a character fitness profile from the bar, which verifies they’re comfortable letting him represent people. At present, it’s pending. Craig tells Cameran about his pillow-making operation. She asks if pillow-making is a passion, and if the end goal is to make a business. He says there’s no reason for it not to, and shows her his pillow covers. She tells him it’s not rocket science to stuff them. She says it’s nice, but in her interview says, wtf?  Cameran says, God bless him, truly, but she thinks it’s nothing more than an excuse not to do what he really wants to be doing. Craig says he needs to focus on one thing; it’s been a pattern in his life. He needs some soul searching to find out why he can’t stick with one thing and follow through. Cameran asks what his life coach said, and he tells her that he stopped calling back. In his interview, he thinks it’s because of shame. We flash back to her asking why he’s a liar, and how they have to work on his vulnerability. Cameran says he has to learn to be accountable, and he believes that was the problem with him and Naomie. Naomie said it more harshly, but she was right. Cameran thinks it would be cathartic to talk to her about it, and also get his house cleaned.

Naomie visits Kathryn, who says they didn’t get to talk at the polo match, because she got sucked into a conversation with Thomas. He was expressing how he and Ashley aren’t doing well, and he’s not happy. She thinks he feels stuck because he’s paying for everything. Kathryn tells Naomie that she got an Instagram message that Ashley was a high-end escort for polo men in Santa Barbara. Naomie heard she was a polo rat. In her interview, Naomie thinks Ashley must have some kind of monetary ambition. Naomie asks if Kathryn is nervous, and she says, not about Ashley, but seeing Patricia will be intense. We flash back to Kathryn telling Shep that she thought she was being served when she got the invitation. Naomie thinks Patricia is over it. In her interview, Kathryn believes it’s a test. Patricia picked the most formal type of event for her to eff up. She tells Naomie that she’s going with Shep, and Naomie says Craig texted her about asking someone else, and seemed to be trying to make her feel like it was her decision. Kathryn asks, why can’t he be straight up? and Naomie says, because he’s Craig.

Craig and Austen pick up their outfits for the Ball, which is tails for the men and gowns for the ladies. Austen tells Craig last night was not an early night. We see a clip of Austen and some of the other guys doing karaoke. Craig says he made it there. Austen says he’s never worn tails. Shep joins them, and says it’s been a while since he’s worn them, explaining that the vest must be even with the coat. In his interview, Shep says the girls get to wear cool dresses, while the men are like Star Wars stormtroopers; everyone looks the same. Craig says he might have to paint his brace. He asks if that girl is still around; the one Thomas is dating. Shep says she is. They talk about Ashley asking if they’d date her, and in his interview, Shep says it’s like she’s hedging her bets. Craig thinks Thomas is throwing money at her to shut her up. She still has no job. Austen thought she was a nurse in California, but Craig says she’s not working now. He asks if Whitney didn’t ask Thomas how much it would take to pay her off. We see a clip of just that, and Ashley suggests five thousand. Being the gentleman he is, Whitney says it should be more like fifty, and suggests Thomas do it.

Everyone gets ready. Ashley asks Thomas for a stiff drink. In his interview, Thomas says if it wasn’t for Ashley’s persistence, they’d have broken up. She feels they still have a chance to make it, and he thinks she has a point. He gives her a cocktail, and a present. He hopes things start looking up. In his interview, he says he doesn’t want to waste his remaining years looking for a partner to share his life with. Ashley opens the box, and its’ a locket with their initials on it. She says she’ll never take it off, and he puts it on her. In his interview, he says he doesn’t want any regrets, and wants to make sure he’s given it everything he has. Ashley says she’ll probably see his baby momma there. Thomas asks if Ashley is going to chat with her, and Ashley says she wants to feel comfortable. Thomas says he gets along with her well.

Chelsea goes to Kathryn’s hotel room, since getting ready with two kids isn’t doable. Ooh, Chelsea is wearing a fur stole, hopefully faux. Chelsea says it’s like a Dior commercial. Kathryn says it’s her first invite in five years. Patricia thought she was a liability. She’s been obsessed with white tie, so there’s no room for criticism. Chelsea says Patricia needs to know her outside of Thomas. Kathryn says she doesn’t care to. She says, Patricia was a single mom going after a single mom. In her interview, Kathryn says Patricia believed Thomas. It’s too bad Patricia didn’t know her outside of that. Austen calls Chelsea, and says he’ll be there in ten. Kathryn says she’s always ready on time, but I’m not sure if she’s being sarcastic.

The quartet plays. The steps outside are covered with bubbles that look like snow. Everything is sparkly and beautiful, including Patricia. Glittering Christmas trees and white lights are everywhere. Champagne is served. Ashley tells Thomas that she hopes to enjoy the company of their friends, but she doesn’t really have any.

Jennifer tells everyone that her child’s favorite word is boobie – in public. Everyone trickles in. Cameran says it’s like the Titanic. Whitney tells Ashley that she looks like Ava Gardner, 1961. Quite debatable. JD (bleh) walks in, saying, let’s get the party started, wearing fur coat over his shoulders. Elizabeth tells him that he looks good. That’s what stress does to you.

Cameran asks if Ashley and Thomas are still together, and Naomie says, very much.  A dude whose name I can’t catch, says there’s an awkward rumor, and Cameran asks if Ashley is pregnant. He says that’s the wrong tree; it’s in the opposite direction. Cameran says, an escort? He says he heard it from a family friend in Santa Barbara. Jennifer isn’t buying it. Craig walks in with his date, Bella, and Naomie gets all weird.

Cameran asks Craig what kind of date it is, and he says they know each other. Cameran says she’ll shut up then, but I’m not sure what all that meant. Thomas asks Whitney, who’s that, looking at Kathryn. He says he didn’t recognize her, and now he lost his train of thought. Kathryn says she’s going the My Fair Lady route. In her interview, Patricia says enough people have told her Kathryn has been redeemed; she wants to see it for herself. She doesn’t want to think of this as test, but… Shep tells Kathryn to let the party settle before she approaches Patricia.

Mingling happens. Shep asks if Kathryn is okay, and she says she’s always good. Austen says Ashley reminds him of Cruella de Vil. That’s certainly more accurate than Ava Gardner. Danni talks to Jennifer, who says her relationship with JD is transforming. Danni says, next stop, boyfriend. Jennifer says she has three little boyfriends at home. Patricia explains to Austen how to sit in tails. Everyone sits down to diner.

Kathryn takes her gloves off with her teeth, and Austen says that’s definitely the way it’s done. Shep pulls them off for her, pretends to sneeze in them, and puts them in his coat pocket. She tells him to keep them. Dinner is served. Cameran FaceTimes with Jason. Whitney says he’s missed. Patricia tells a friend that Kathryn is the one with the tiara. Kathryn knows their staring at her, and says she wants to thank Patricia for inviting her. In her interview, Kathryn says Patricia has a statuesque resting bitch face, and she can’t read her. Bella cuts Craig’s food for him. I have no words. Bella steps away, and Cameran asks if he’s going to talk to Naomie. He says he needs a few drinks first. Jennifer says she’s had no contact with Kathryn, and Ashley says she burned that bitch. Kathryn tells her table about last seeing Jennifer at the deposition where she lied. We flash back to the reunion, and Kathryn calling her a liar. Kathryn says Jennifer deserves no acknowledgement from her. Ashley tells Jennifer that Kathryn says she never thinks about her, but she’s delusional. Every night, she thinks about how Ashley Jacobs is winning. Thomas looks like he has a headache.

Kathryn asks Chelsea about the rumor. She’s not being mean, just throwing it out there. Chelsea asks how much escorts make, since she’s a businesswoman. Naomie makes fun of Bella, who doesn’t know to take her gloves off for dinner. Jennifer tells Thomas it’s not going well with Ashley, and he says she lacks diplomacy. Jennifer says she’s not from the South. Austen starts to talk about the rumor, and Thomas says it’s absurd. Jennifer says she moved there for Thomas; it’s not fair.

Austen says women can be nasty, but it’s being said Ashley is an escort. Jennifer says she has a career, and his remarks are incendiary. Ashley appears in a puff of smoke like the wicked witch. She asks if Austen thinks she’s a nurse. Austen says he has no idea. He’s never seen her do anything but spend Thomas’s money. Jennifer says that’s insulting, and says he called her hooker. Austen says he was just relaying what’s being said. In his interview, Austen says if it was his girlfriend, he would hope someone would tell him. Jennifer asks what if it was Austen’s sister, and they start to argue. Patricia watches from her table, telling Elizabeth the dynamics are interesting. Ashley tries to shove her nursing license in Austen’s hand, and when he won’t take it, shoves it in his face. Cameran asks Whitney what’s with the card Ashley is pushing at Austen? Craig thinks Thomas is happier when Ashley’s not there. Ashley screeches at Austen that she needs a South Carolina license to work in South Carolina. He asks what’s happening with that, and she squawks, it’s called a process. She says there’s no reasoning with him. Thomas tells her to stop it, and be above it.

Austen tells Chelsea that Ashley brought his sister into it. Ashley gripes that Thomas didn’t have her back, and he says he didn’t want to stoop to that level. Dude whose name I don’t know says, the party isn’t going in your favor if everyone says you’re a hooker. A cautionary tale for us all. Ashley doesn’t want Craig to think she was hitting on him; she was just flattering his ego. Then she says it was a joke, because she can’t make up her mind which story to go with. Back at the table, Austen says she attacked him, and told her no one here was calling her that. Chelsea says, only their whole table. Ashley tells Craig that he’s not a backup. He has her confused with Kathryn. She’s not going to break up with Thomas then screw his friends. Craig says she’s not working, she’s spending Thomas’s money, then she says she’d date him or Shep if they were older. It as guy code to ask Thomas if he’s sure about her motives.

The music starts. Patricia wonders what deal is with Kathryn. She invited her, but is yet to be thanked or acknowledged. Elizabeth tells Patricia that Kathryn does want to talk to her. Patricia says, that, and a quarter, making me laugh. (In case you’re not familiar with the phrase, the rest is, will get you on the bus. In other words, it’s meaningless unless Kathryn puts her desire into action. Although the bus costs a lot more than a quarter now.) Kathryn dances with Shep, and Kathryn calls him aggressive. Austen and Chelsea dance. Kathryn asks Shep what to say to Patricia, and he tells her to be contrite. Thank her for the invitation, say she doesn’t want to bother her, but it’s such a lovely party. And it’s so much better than two years ago. They laugh. In her interview, Kathryn says five years ago, she was in exile, blacklisted, and painted as a psycho. We flash back to Patricia calling Kathryn a shameless strumpet. Kathryn wonders, do they hug? Kiss? Shake hands? She didn’t google the etiquette; she just googled the clothes.

Kathryn approaches Patricia, and thanks her for the invitation; it means a lot to be included. It’s been a while, but she wants Patricia to know how much she appreciates the beautiful evening. She says Patricia also looks lovely, and Patricia says, as does she. Patricia takes Kathryn’s hand and thanks her. Elizabeth gets up, and tells Kathryn to sit down. Watching, Shep is excited, saying, it’s all happening. Kathryn says it gives her a chance to be acceptable; it is very different from five years ago. We flash back to Kathryn screaming Thomas’s name while chasing him down the pier. Cameran tells Whitney that it’s jarring. He says like the mailman shaking the Doberman’s hand (isn’t that paw?)>Enemies coming together. Patricia tells Kathryn that Thomas said she’s doing well, and is having a good time with the babies. Kathryn says she also has a job, and structure is good for her. Being a mother is difficult, but it brings joy. Patricia asks about her job. When Kathryn says it’s at Gwenn’s, Patricia she always liked clothes, and looked good. She likes to get on her soapbox about women having careers. It’s important, and gives them a sense of accomplishment, whatever happens in life. Kathryn admits to looking up white tie, and Patricia is glad she did, because she looks perfect. Kathryn says she researched the history. Thomas comes over, but Ashley won’t have it, and can’t drag him away fast enough. Jennifer sits down, much to Jennifer’s dismay. Kathryn says she didn’t mean to interrupt, and takes her leave. In her interview, Patricia says she was pleasantly surprised. Kathryn was gracious, charming, and she was impressed by her demeanor. She feels a genuine liking for Kathryn. I nearly get tears in my eyes, if only because Kathryn has worked so hard to better herself against all odds. I also have to add that she does look fabulous. Her hair is in an updo with whitish streaks (probably extensions). She’s wearing an off-the-shoulder velvet gown that has a thigh-high side slit. The updo also sports a delicate tiara.

Kathryn tells Shep about how Patricia appreciated her googling white tie, and said she wore all the right things. She wanted Patricia to realize that she respects her. Shep says there’s not one person against her in the room. Kathryn says, actually, there is, but it’s irrelevant. He hugs her, and calls her his demure, well-behaved, wonderful date.

Thomas and Craig twirl in their tails. Whitney dips Cameran, and she tells him that he’s secretly the one she’s wanted all along. Kathryn goes back to her original table. Craig approaches Naomie and says he wants to apologize for things in their relationship. When she’s ready to talk, let him know. She says he’s not a genuine person and to eff off. He says, that’s not mature. In her interview, Naomie says it’s the moment she’s been waiting for; him saying she’s not the only problem. But he picks the night it stopped mattering. He says he’s sorry for everything that happened, and she tells him to go away. He mumbles apologies, and wanders off, telling someone, that went well.

There’s sporadic dancing. Patricia says, there’s no crazy going on, and wonders if she missed something. Kathryn goes out for smoke, and Ashley follows her. Kathryn is sitting outside on a bench, and Ashley asks if she can join her. Kathryn says she’d love it. Ashley says she didn’t want to talk upstairs. With everyone around, it gets her charged. Kathryn says she’s resolved her issues with everyone, even Patricia, and she’s in a good place. She’d like to understand where Ashley is coming from, since she has no clue. Ashley wants to begin by apologizing. She says things got heated at Hilton Head, and she’s sorry for her part in it. How about the part where she started it?  Kathryn has no idea where Ashley’s head is at. One minute, Ashley respects her, and the next, she’s a terrible person. Ashley crossed the line in so many ways. Ashley immediately becomes her true, evil queen self, and tells Kathryn, don’t deflect, which makes no sense whatsoever. Kathryn says she’s not. Ashley tells her not to forget her kids were taken from her. Kathryn says she can’t ever forget that. Ashley starts to rant, and Kathryn tells her to calm down. Ashley says, there she is. Kathryn says all Ashley is, is a gold-digger. No one likes her, including her boyfriend. Ashley says she’s not going anywhere, and Kathryn says it’s all in her head. Ashley insists that she and Thomas are best thing to ever happen to one another. Kathryn asks why he’s miserable and depressed then. She says they talk. Ashley gets all weird and shaky, and says when Kathryn calls or texts, it gets Thomas stressed. He can’t stand her. Kathryn says they talk all the time, and Ashley is freaking her out. Ashley tells her to be careful. She knows a lot of information. Kathryn asks if Ashley is threatening her, and Ashley says, yeah, she is.

Kathryn calls Ashley psychotic, but Ashley doesn’t care. Kathryn tells her to back the eff up, and realize her place. Ashley says she has life Kathryn wants; that’s why she’s so threatened. Ashley heads for the door, telling Kathryn God bless. Kathryn says, peace.

Ashley confronts Thomas, asking if he’s been talking smack about her with Kathryn. He insists he hasn’t. Ashley says Kathryn is nasty, and Thomas tells her to stop. He suggests they leave. Kathryn calls him over, and tells him that his girlfriend is a psycho. Ashley tells him not to be a p*ssy, and to speak up. Tell Kathryn how great their relationship is. Kathryn says they’re not talking about her, and Ashley tries to pull him by the arm. Thomas tells her that he’ll be there in a minute. She wants him to tell his baby to find someone else to screw. Danni has her head in her hands. Kathryn points out how Ashley treats her. She knows he’s in a hard spot, and has to go. She says Ashely is scary, and probably scares him too. She won’t accept Ashley being around her kids. She tells him to be careful. If Ashley threatened her, she’ll threaten him too.

Ashley says she wants to save Thomas, and tells him to give her a hug, because everyone thinks they’re breaking up. Kathryn says Ashley must be pretty flexible, since she manages to have her foot in her mouth and her head up her ass at the same time. She walks over to where Thomas and Ashley are standing. She tells Ashley to look her in the eye. She says Ashley crossed line as a mother; screw her. Ashley says she’d hoped they could be cool, and Kathryn says they’ll never be cool. She’ll be gone in a week. Ashley tells Kathryn she’s not the best mom, and does she want her kids to see her like that, pointing to the slit in her skirt. Oh man. Kathryn says Ashley needs to hear her. She’s such a child, and needs to STFU. She doesn’t want Ashley coming around her or her children. Ashley says, good luck with that, and smiles, edging closer to Thomas. Kathryn says she screwed with the wrong person, and screwed with the wrong family. Ashley says they’re not a family. She’s just an egg donor. Kathryn says it’s her effing town, and Ashley says she’s not going anywhere; God bless. Kathryn says, peace, bitch. Ashley tells Kathryn that she’ll in her prayers. Kathryn suggests she pray for herself. Danni cracks up, and Kathryn says, effing psycho.

The text tells us: Six months later, Thomas and Ashley are still together, but Thomas and Kathryn are joyfully co-parenting. And now, Kathryn has 50/500 custody. Yay!

Next time, the reunion.

👾 Because It’s 4 am & I Love Max…

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Francesca tells Sonny and Mike that Mike’s new medication is having a positive effect. Sonny tells Mike that doesn’t mean he won’t be seeing the doctor anymore. Mike says he can’t complain. Griff and Francesca treat him like a prince. He says friends help each other, and tells Francesca that he has a grandson around her age. She says she knows Michael, and he’s very lucky to have grandfather like him. Sonny tells Mike to let Francesca get back to work. Mike thinks they would hit off, and there’s no harm in trying. Sonny thinks he should ask Michael first. Mike says Michael will just give him the runaround, and asks if Carly will be there.

Julian asks Alexis if therapy means rehashing the gory details of their relationship. She says it does, and he asks, what could go wrong with that? She’d appreciate some cooperation, and he tells her that he didn’t say no, but it’s a lot to ask. She says after everything he put her through, he should be more accommodating. He’s concerned about the intimacy of the situation, and says he’d like to ask Kim. Alexis didn’t know they were at that point in the relationship.

At the hospital, Dr. Shaw is looking for some reports. Kiki says she can help, but he says he’ll stop by later. She tells Elizabeth that David warned her that other doctors might feel uncomfortable with her. Dr. Shaw isn’t the first one either. She was ignored when she spoke to a surgeon in the elevator. Elizabeth thinks David is the one who should be getting the cold shoulder. Kiki thinks there’s no way she’s the first person he’s done this to. Lulu comes in and Kiki says, speak of the devil. Lulu asks if they’re talking trash on her, and Elizabeth says, not her. Kiki asks if anyone has come forward.

At The Floating Rib, Anna finishes telling Finn a story about getting Robert to stand in for her at a concert. Finn says they’ve managed to spend the entire day hanging out. They kiss and Obrecht says, look at the lovebirds.

Valentin goes to Nina’s office. He tells the receptionist that he wants to surprise her, and will take full responsibility. She hopes Nina knows how lucky she is to have a husband like him. He says, probably not. He closes the door, and says he hopes he can remind her tonight.

At the cabin, Nina tells Peter to wake up, but he doesn’t.

I have a mini dog emergency, but alas, no time to work internet magic tonight, and miss a few minutes. Sorry. I’ve had to wear five extra hats this week.

Sonny suggests he and Mike go to Mike’s old neighborhood on Charles Street. They can see what’s cooking and bring back old memories.

Lulu tells Kiki that she’s checked the other hospitals where David worked, but no claims have been filed against him. The HR departments seemed caught off guard. Kiki asks where that leaves them, and Lulu says, waiting. Amy is willing to talk about the culture of sexism at GH, but has no specific experience with David. Kiki says if no one comes forward, the case has no chance. He gets to live his life and do this to more women.

Alexis tells Julian that she didn’t realize they were at the asking permission stage. He says things are good between them, and he doesn’t want to mess it up. He did Alexis wrong in many ways, and one was not communicating. He has the chance not to repeat the same mistake with Kim. He hopes she understands. He’s growing, and she needs to grow too. She tells him that if he decides to help, give Doc a call.

Kim asks Julian what that was all about; it sounds like couple’s therapy. He says it sounded that way to him too, but Alexis insists it’s about past relationships, and called it guest starring. He couldn’t give Alexis an answer until he ran it by her. Kim appreciates it, but he doesn’t have to get permission for this or anything else. It’s not the kind of relationship she’s after. Does he want to go? Julian says he has other things he’d rather do, like pay bills, do laundry, and darn his socks. Sifting through their old relationship doesn’t sound fun. Alexis’s goal might be closure, but he’s afraid of being trapped in some circle. Kim says it sounds like he’s made his decision, and he guesses he has. She has to get home, and tells him that he makes his own choices, and she’ll support whatever he decides.

Outside, Mike tells Sonny this is the best dive bar, but Sonny says it’s under new management, and hip now. They go in, and Sonny tells Julian to relax. They’re grabbing some coffee, on the house, and wants Julian to include the July payment in full.

Anna asks Obrecht what she did to upset her. Obrecht says she’s upsetting the patrons, who don’t appreciate her revolting spectacle. Anna says it must be hard, dealing with the loss of Nathan. Obrecht says not to dare patronizing her. Anna says she was trying to reach out. They’re kind of on the same side. Obrecht asks if she thinks they’re buddies because they both despise Faison. The enemy of my enemy is my friend, is foolish. There’s ample room for enemies in this world, and Anna is one of hers. She put a target on Nathan’s back, and her lies led to his death. Anna asks if Obrecht thinks her son would want bitterness and blame? Obrecht is sure he’s be first to tell her to forgive, and Anna suggests she try it – for him and herself. Obrecht calls her scarecrow, and says she may be right. They might both have something in common. They’ll never see their sons again.

Nina tells Peter no one is trying to kill him. Confess, and it will be over. He says she doesn’t really think Obrecht is sincere with that plan. Once he confesses, they’ll call the cops to collect him. He asks how the confession will be admissible when it was given under duress? Once they take him, they’ll know he was held captive. The only people facing charges will be her and Obrecht. Obrecht knows it, and she wants him to confess that Nathan’s death is all his fault. True or not, it doesn’t matter. Once he says the words, she’ll kill him.

On the phone, Valentin tells someone he’ll see them in a half hour. If they come in fifteen minutes, he’ll double their bonus. Finn walks in, and Valentin says his wife isn’t there. Finn says he’s looking for Valentin.

Julian serves Mike and Sonny their coffee anything else. Mike guesses there’s a good story between Sonny and Julian, but Sonny says it’s not worth talking about. He wants to talk about what they were discussing the other day. Mike asks for a reminder, and Sonny says when he helped him out in Croton.

Brad walks into Charlie’s and Julian asks if he’s there to give him another ultimatum. Brad wants to thank him for what he put together for him and Lucas; all the information meant a lot. They also appreciate Julian’s understanding. Julian says Lucas told him that he couldn’t afford one wrong step, and Julian didn’t want to risk it. He knows they’re not crazy about the birth mother’s agreement. Brad says she gets to know his GPA from college, but he doesn’t even know her name. If they follow rules, she’ll have no reason to change her mind. Julian flashes back to asking Kim about the birth mother’s records being on file, and Kim telling him that she’s still a patient until she gives birth. Julian asks Brad if he happens to know at what hospital the mother is giving birth.

Elizabeth tells Kiki that everyone will know she’s telling the truth. It’s been retweeted and shared more than anything else they’ve written. Kiki says she hasn’t read the comments, and Lulu tells her not to do that to herself. They’re sick trolls, shaming the victim. Kiki says they know who she is, and where she works, and think she should die. Francesca listens. Kiki feels helpless. Lulu says she has a ton of support, and someone else coming forward won’t happen overnight. Dr. Bensch’s days are numbered. Francesca’s head pops up. Elizabeth asks if Kiki is okay, and Kiki says work is keeping her sane. Francesca approaches Kiki. She says they don’t know each other well, but she saw the article. Most people would be too scared to come forward. For what it’s worth, Francesca admires her. Her courage means a lot.

Anna asks Obrecht what she means. Obrecht says Henrik fled the second he could. She doubts he’d risk a bullet to find his mom. She tells Anna to keep lying to herself. Her delusions will keep her occupied until Henrik faces retribution. She says not to forget they still have their own score to settle.

Valentin asks Finn to what he owes this unexpected pleasure? Finn wants to tell him to his face that he and Anna are together. Valentin says, good for them. He thought it was going to be touch and go until the end of time. Finn says he played God with a child’s life, and devastated lives in the process. If he gets involved in Anna’s life again, it will be his last move.

Kim asks Elizabeth if Linda Cartwright’s labs are back. We can probably assume that’s Lucas and Brad’s birth mother. Elizabeth says she’ll check, and Kim asks if she has a minute; it’s personal and embarrassing. Elizabeth says, no judgments. Kim asks how she and Franco deal with each other’s exes. Elizabeth says it’s been a mutual co-existence, except for Jason and Franco. She asks if Julian is having a hard time with Drew. Kim says they were scratchy in the past, but she’s the one having issues about Julian’s ex.

Brad tells Julian they don’t know where she’s from or where she’s giving birth. Julian says it must be stressful until the thirty-day mark. Brad says Alexis is handling the adoption, so she knows everything, but she’s bound by law to keep it confidential, and keep them in dark.

Alexis arrives at the hospital, and tells Lulu that it was a good article. The exposure is amazing. She asks if anyone has come forward, and Lulu says, not so far. Alexis says Kiki getting her name out there will make it easier for others. They can take him to court, but without a corroborating witness, there might be no way to win.

Mike tells Sonny that he doesn’t remember being in Croton. Sonny says Mike got him out of some trouble; a situation in a field outside of Croton. Mike says it doesn’t ring a bell. Sonny tells him not to worry about it. Mike looks at the old photos on the walls.

Valentin asks if Finn just threatened to kill him. Finn tells him to stay out of Anna’s life. Valentin knows he had fun playing Spy Vs Spy with Anna, but he’s not dealing with an amateur. Finn says he has access to things that make it seem like you’ve passed away peacefully. Valentin says it’s not easy to kill someone. He and Anna know. Why would he want to? Valentin is actually a fan. Finn makes Anna happy. Finn suggests he concentrate on his own marriage, or whatever’s left of it. He walks out.

Peter says Nina knows he’s right. She says he’s just trying to get in her head, and it’s not happening. He says they know how it ends; Obrecht has already been violent. Nina insists she’s not going to kill him. He says she’s disassociated from reality. She can’t get revenge on his father, and he’s the next best thing. She wants him to take the blame. Obrecht will get satisfaction in killing him, but what does Nina get? He tells her to get out of it. She still has family and a career. She has a life that still matters, and a future waiting. He tells her to please make it stop. Do it now, before she loses everything too.

Finn asks Anna how the talk with the German went. Anna says, Swiss, and he says, whatever. She says charming as ever. She can’t blame her for grieving, but something Obrecht said unsettled her. She doesn’t think she intended for that either. She said Anna wasn’t seeing her son again. It could have been an all-purpose wish, but she got the impression that Obrecht knows something she’s not telling.

Obrecht returns to the cabin. She didn’t expect Nina, and Nina says she’s making sure they’re still on the same page regarding the goal. Obrecht says a confession, what else? Nina says, besides the mishap with the bat, she doesn’t intend to hurt him, right? She tells Obrecht she won’t be an accomplice. Obrecht says Nina is unaccustomed to these situations, but she isn’t. Trust her. Unlike Henrik, she’ll only stab someone in the front, not in the back.

Julian tells Brad that it must be rough, having the information just out of reach. Brad says they’re taking it on faith. There’s no sense making waves. Julian says if there’s anything he can do to help, let him know. Brad says he’ll see him around. Julian thinks he will.

Kiki doesn’t understand how Alexis can say that. She’s the one who encouraged her to take it to court. Alexis says she still feels the same way, but it’s an uphill fight. Lulu asks if there isn’t a lesser burden of proof in civil court, but Alexis tells her it’s he said, she said. Unless his name is on public record, they can’t counter-sue. It’s only the truth if proven in court. Lulu says that’s the problem with harassment; it happens behind closed doors. Alexis says she wouldn’t be doing her job if she didn’t tell Kiki. She’s behind her 100%, but tells her to think it over. Kiki says it shouldn’t be so hard to do the right thing. Lulu says one thing is guaranteed. A lot of women will thank her for speaking up. Someone could still come forward before they get to court. Francesca says, someone is.

Julian gives Sonny his payment. Mike looks at a picture, and says he knows that guy. Sonny says it’s Charlie Delaney, he built this place. He says Mike lived across the street. Maybe he remembers him from when he was living there, but Mike says no. He hasn’t seen him since Sonny was around eighteen.

Obrecht tells Peter, alone at last. She opens a Styrofoam container. She says she adores barbeque. It’s a brisket sandwich with spicy sauce. She says he must be famished, and he tells her that he passed out earlier. She says he’s pathetic. The average person can go for a week without food. He was far from death’s door. She must say she’s enjoying it though. She bites into the sandwich.

Nina sees curtains in front of her office. She walks inside to find it decorated, and Valentin telling her, welcome back to Morocco.

Anna can’t believe Finn confronted Valentin. Finn says he had it coming, and she says, he’s lethal. She’s grown fond of Finn, and tells him to give Valentin a wide berth from now on. She just found him. She let him all the way into her life, and doesn’t want to lose him. Certainly not to Valentin. Finn tells her not to worry. He’s not going anywhere. They kiss.

Francesca says she didn’t mean to eavesdrop. They were looking for another woman harassed by David, and here she is. He did the same thing to her.

Kim doesn’t love the idea of Julian reliving his relationship with Alexis in therapy. Elizabeth says, why would she? No one is that progressive. Kim thought she was. Elizabeth says, surprise; she’s human. Kim says maybe she should have been honest about how she felt. She thinks it’s strange that Alexis wants him to go to her therapy session; it seems intrusive. Elizabeth says, and she doesn’t want to appear like the threatened, jealous girlfriend; it’s normal. Kim says it’s a good lesson on what not to do next time. She doesn’t think it’s worth dragging out, since he decided not to go.

Julian sees Alexis at the hospital. He says he was just on his way to see Doc. He’s made his decision. He’ll go to therapy with her.

Tomorrow, Julian calls it off, Nina says she had to take justice into her own hands, and Mike says he’s not an invalid.

Southern Charm

I hope Ashley thinks a ring is inside that box Thomas is going to give her, but it turns out to be a wallet.

Naomie goes to kickboxing class. Hopefully, it will get out some of her aggression. She calls Danni, telling her that Kathryn never showed, and isn’t picking up her calls. Danni hasn’t heard from her either. Naomie calls Shep. She’s worried that this is like the old Kathryn. Shep says the screen on Kathryn’s phone is severely cracked, and it might be an issue.

Shep orders lunch with blueberry beer, because it has anti-oxidants. He’s against oxidants. Austen joins him. Shep asks what the next step is with Austen’s beer, and how much cash he’ll need. We flash back to Austen’s parents expecting success. He tells Shep that he got into a tiff with Victoria. I was right. The hug was involved. And Austen was the one who gave himself away by telling Victoria about it. I didn’t see that coming. Shep says it’s like a romantic comedy. Austen says Victoria tossed a drink on him. He told her to get in an Uber and go home. It’s been radio silence since, and he blocked her. In his interview, Austen says she made it crystal clear they’re over, and he has no remorse. Shep says it would be crazy if before Christmas, everyone was single. Austen wants a stable relationship for Christmas, and Shep says he’s not going not get it.

Ashley visits Patricia. She feels lucky Patricia could squeeze her in, since her time is so valuable. I’d be willing to bet Patricia knows a brownnoser when she sees one too. Patricia notices Ashley is hoarse, and asks Michael for two medicinal drinks; a hot toddy for Ashley, and Patricia’s usual martini. Ashley tells Patricia that she and Thomas pumped the brake. It’s been a transition, and she knows Patricia heard about Hilton Head. She babbles about there being an issue with the children’s mother. The tension built, and she felt a shift in the relationship. She whines that Kathryn texted Thomas about not wanting her around the kids because she’s angry. Patricia wonders if Ashley’s immune system is run down, and asks if Thomas is still going out partying. Ashley says he’s out right now. He’s an older man who should get his sh*t together. Patricia tells her if there’s one thing she’s learned in her 105 years on this earth, is that men don’t change. In terms of managing Thomas – although feminists wouldn’t like it – Ashley should just sit and listen. In her interview, Patricia says, in the south, they don’t get involved with these issues. Like her mother said, keep quiet and think of England. She tells Ashley to let it be about him. Ashley says it always is, but Patricia says, if she’s secure, let it. She says Kathryn is always going to be the children’s mother, so she should concentrate on being the girlfriend. Is this the way she wants to live, and the man she wants to devote her life to?

Naomie brings Chelsea a load of juicing supplies. She tells Chelsea about no one hearing from Kathryn since Monday. It’s like in the old days when she used to drop off the face of the earth. She wonders if it has anything to do with Thomas and Ashley and the kids. In her interview, Naomie says if Kathryn messes up one time, she’s screwed, and Thomas will go to court. Danni tells Naomie about talking to Craig, who wouldn’t get a flu shot because he might walk backwards for the rest of his life. Naomie says he read an article about someone it happened to, and he wasn’t risking walking to see a baby. Danni asks if she should call Kathryn, but Naomie says she already asked Shep to call.

Cameran meets Shep and Whitney for lunch. She says she misses them the most, and it reminds me of The Wizard of Oz. In her interview, Cameran says she’s a prisoner to breastfeeding. She doesn’t eat a healthy diet, and thinks producing so much milk is crazy. She’s brought along some to-go milk, and pours both of them a shot. She says it’s like becoming blood brothers, but they’re milk brothers. Whitney spits it out. So much for etiquette. In her interview, Cameran says since she got pregnant, Whitney has had a strange fixation with lactation, and she couldn’t leave Shep out; he’s never turned down a shot. Shep says it’s good, and he likes it. Whitney thanks him for that.

Cameran asks if Thomas is still with Ashley. Whitney says he went shopping for a Craig-ass promise ring. Shep doesn’t think it will last. Thomas doesn’t want to deprive other women of him. Cameran suggests Shep go after Ashley, and he says, no. Cameran wonders if Craig has been laid since Naomie, and then wonders if he’d ever been laid before Naomie. She tells the guys she has to wait two more weeks before having sex. Whitney brings up the topic I can never get rid of, vaginal rejuvenation. Cameran says she took a look, and it looks the same.

Craig meets friend Warren from law school. They walked graduation together, although Craig didn’t get his diploma until a couple of years later. Warren says his practice is good, and asks if Craig is looking for a job. Craig says he wants to work for himself from home, and tells Warren that he’s a seamstress. Warren asks if he has a business plan, and if pillows are lucrative. Craig tells him about designing the pillow for Patricia, and Warren wants him to admit it’s a bit farcical. Craig shows him one of the designs, and Warren says it looks like clip art. Craig mumbles something about licensing, and Warren tells him it’s awful; Patricia won’t sell that. In his interview, Craig says there are a million pillows at Warren’s house, but his wife buys them. Warren isn’t his target audience. Warren jokes that Craig tried to off himself with a butter knife, and Craig says he couldn’t even do that right.

Thomas gets the kids ready for school. He knew intuitively that his life would center around kids, but envisioned it as the nuclear family, not being a single dad. He says co-parenting with Kathryn is good, the kids are happy, and they’re getting along. Kathryn has transformed from a carefree adult to a woman with a woman’s heart. We see clips of them with the kids. He says if she continues on this trajectory (yes, he put it that way), she will be mother of the year in five. Ashley was upset because there’s been no proposal. He knows she doesn’t want to waste her time, but he has a lot to lose. He needs to focus on his kids and getting along with their mother.

Danni hopes she’s not overreacting, but it’s like Kathryn fell off the face of the earth. She’s going to Kathryn’s apartment with Naomie. She hasn’t responded to their texts or calls, and missed another appointment without calling. Danni says Thomas having a girlfriend hasn’t been good, but Naomie says it’s who the girlfriend is. Danni says dealing with Ashley has sucked the life out of Kathryn; it sucks the life out of her. She wishes she could pick locks. Naomie asks if that isn’t illegal, and Danni says no, because they’re her friends. Ha-ha! Okay.

They knock on Kathryn’s door, but there’s no answer. Naomie uses a bobby pin on the keyhole. Danni says if Naomie makes it happen, she’ll be impressed, but the pin doesn’t fit. Naomie thinks they should find the property manager. Danni asks, what if they call the police? Naomie says the manager should let them in if they explain. What world do they live in?

The property manager tells them that Kathryn isn’t dead; she’s in there. They thank her for checking. Danni is pissed. They knock again, and Naomie asks Kathryn to open the door. Naomie wonders what’s wrong with her, and thinks it’s not good at all.

Craig arranges some flowers. Barely. It’s more like he makes a mess. Patricia calls, and he tells her that he’s trying to be a cultured adult. She asks if can come over in an hour, and finalize the design; they’re running out of time on her end. He thinks maybe he’ll bring the flowers. He screws around with the designs –what we call clip art – on his laptop.

Patricia gives the sage observation that, nothing is worse than bad potpourri. I can probably think of a lot of worse things, but that is pretty bad. She’s waiting for Craig; she called hours ago. It’s six pm, and he’s still home. He says, it is what it is. He didn’t even call her??? He walks out the door with the flowers and the laptop.

Michael suggests Craig is doing his hair again. He finally arrives, with one of the flowers getting broken in transport. I love Patricia’s cardigan. It’s very long, and looks almost like silver chainmail. She tells Craig they’re in a time crunch. He says something about fabrics, and she says, design is the key. He shows her a picture of two cartoon dogs under palm trees. She asks how he did the dogs, and he says he found a stencil online, but he did the colors. She explains that he can’t get it off the internet; it has to be original. He tries to backtrack, saying that he needed something to feed off of. She says the problem is timing; she needs the design right now. He claims he wasn’t aware of that, but we see a clip where she gives him a two-week time frame. Patricia says it’s been two months. She loves him, and has given him more latitude than she would ordinarily, but they need to table it; it’s business. He thinks maybe he should have spent more time on this. He thanks her, saying it didn’t work out this time, but who knows what’s down the road. I can guarantee it’s not Patricia hiring him for anything. In his interview, he says he only needed one more night, and he could have made it perfect. No. A thousand more nights wouldn’t have helped. As he gets in his car, he says, that was bullcrap.

Chelsea brings a ton of food to Naomie’s, who is having a manicurist and masseuse come over. Naomie tells her about going to Kathryn’s with Danni, and that they had a wellness check done. All they could say was that she was alive, but no details. Naomie feels bad for her. The manicurist and masseuse arrive, behind them. She still hasn’t heard from Kathryn. Cameran walks in, saying she’s free. No one can believe she’s just had a baby, and Naomie touches her boobs. Chelsea has a business opportunity, and tells her about people who buy breast milk. They can get rich. Cameran is asked what the highs and lows are about being a mother. She says the low is that her life was altered. She was forced to be unselfish. The high is that she has a baby that’s part of both she and her husband, and it’s unconditional love. In her interview, Cameran says Palmer smiling for the first time made her cry. Her heart isn’t cold and dead after all. Naomie gives Cameran a collage she made from the ultrasound. Cameran has to jet. She’s still learning to balance living her life and being a mother. It’s no longer about her, and was a lesson she needed to learn. Naomie gets a massage. She says if she had her blanket and cat, she’d be in heaven. I see her future, and it involves a blanket and several cats.

Shep calls Chelsea. He knows they’re worried about Kathryn, and tells her that Thomas said she picked up the kids. Thomas doesn’t know she’s been keeping to herself, and Shep doesn’t want him to know. Chelsea says, and they don’t want Ashley to know.

Thomas and Ashley go out to dinner. The wine is called wolf-something, and Thomas says he was called wolf when he was single. Ashley says he might be single again. She loves him, but thinks they hit a rough patch. It’s been volatile since she got back. She tells him that she’s starting to access everything, and there are red flags. When the wine is served, Ashley makes a face, and says it tastes interesting. Thomas gives her the box. She calls him babe, and I choke. It’s a bracelet, and you can tell she’s disappointed. Thank you, God. The food comes, and Ashley thanks him. He tells her a healthy relationship is interdependent, but not co=dependent. He thinks she’s kind of needy, and if that’s what he wanted, would she be attracted to someone like that? She needs to be involved in something outside of him. She asks if he means like a job. God forbid. He says she’s looking to him to be her tower of strength, but she has to find it inside herself. Ashley says they’ve never had a chance, since she stopped listening after she realized she might have to go back to work.

Kathryn stops by Danni’s place. Her dog is wearing the cone of shame. Kathryn says she’s alive and well. Danni says, don’t do this to her again, and asks where she’s been. Why wasn’t she responding? Kathryn almost gave her a heart aneurysm. Kathryn says everything going on has been a lot, and she took a mental break. She turned off the phone, and locked herself in her apartment. Danni says they were concerned about her well-being. Kathryn says it wasn’t intentional; she didn’t even see they’d called. Danni says she didn’t know if Kathryn was alive, and it scared her. Kathryn explains that she’s been on meds for depression. She was happy and adjusting to sober living, and thought didn’t need them. She stopped taking them, and didn’t realize how it would affect her. It increased her anxiety and emotional response, and snowballed. She says she’s kind of ashamed, and Danni tells her not to feel like she can’t come to her. Kathryn knew she wouldn’t judge. It was a matter of confronting it; saying it out loud. In her interview, Kathryn says when she got the diagnosis of anxiety and depression, she was relieved. She knew why she was making irresponsible choices. Now she takes antidepressants. She tells Danni that for a long time she thought she had nothing to bring to a friendship except being a burden. Danni says that’s not true, and she gets something out of their friendship. She starts to cry, saying she was scared. She loves Kathryn. Kathryn says she loves Danni too, and they hug. All has been forgiven.

Next time, Shep tries to cook, Thomas talks to Patricia about Ashley, Chelsea asks Austen to go to Patricia’s Winter Wonderland party, and there’s a polo match.

🎩👒👑🎓 My Week, Many Hats…