Tag Archives: The Real Housewives of NYC

June 1, 2016- GH & NYC in the Berkshires

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

No Little Women tonight due to the Roots extravaganza. MasterChef has started up again though, as well as Wayward Pines, which for some reason I want to call Wandering or Whispering Pines. Not all of the critics are thrilled with Pines taking the story three years into the future when the kids have taken over, as well as changing most of the cast, but so far, so good with me. Moving on.

General Hospital

Lulu and Dante look over properties while they sit in the park. He thinks one place is perfect for the three of them and she asks what about the four of them? Dante wonders if she’s ready to move forward with that, and she says if you wait until you’re ready for anything, it will never happen. Truth! She says since they’re looking for a house, they might as well plan ahead. Both their phones ring at the same time with news about Nicholas and Lucas. They both leave for Windemere.

Kiki is on break, so she sits down with Dillon. He asks if someone recorded their Nurses Ball performance because it felt like a dream. She says she had a great time with him. He apologizes for moving too fast, but says it felt right to kiss her. She says it’s the best thing that’s happened to her in a while. I’m in. I’ve thought it was time for her to shake Morgan for a while.

Carly talks to Bobbie on the phone and tells Sonny that Lucas is in a coma.

Hayden and Laura talk about finding Nicholas. Spencer is back. I missed him! He has a cute spiky haircut and glasses now. He asks what’s up with all the police and if somebody died. Laura explains that they found a broken window and now they can’t find Nicholas. She says the police are there to help figure out what happened. Spencer says foul play must be suspected if the police are there. Hayden mentions Jason and Elizabeth picks right up on that.

Jason insists on having his lawyer there for questioning. Jordan says that implies guilt, but Diane walks in and says not having a lawyer implies stupidity. Jordan’s first question is how Jason ended up in Nicholas’s bedroom around the same time Nicholas crashed through the window. Diane gets Jordan up to speed about the ELQ lawsuit. Jordan asks Jason what he was doing at Windemere.

Sonny wants to talk to Carly before she leaves for the hospital, but the doorbell rings. It’s Ava who’s there to pick up Avery per the agreement. Carly is surprised, and Ava makes a snarky remark about Avery being her and Sonny’s daughter, so Carly doesn’t need to know everything. Carly wants to talk to Sonny privately. Sonny wants Ava to apologize to Carly for being rude.

Hayden tries to comfort Spencer. Laura says it’s easy to go to the worst case scenario, but they have a lot of reason to be hopeful. Spencer says he knows he should’t jump to conclusions without evidence and asks about DNA and some other stuff no other kid of that age would know about. He says they’ve covered all they collectively know, so he’s going to find the detectives for an update. Laura wants to go with him. Spencer thinks it’s a good idea in case the detectives stonewall him because he’s a kid. He cracks me up.

Elizabeth says Hayden tried to kill Nicholas and wants to pin it on Jason. Probably plenty of people know she was still at the ball at the time, so that seems stupid even for Elizabeth. And like Elizabeth didn’t have her beady little eyes on Hayden the whole time they were in the same place.

Jason says he went to Windemere to talk to Nicholas about the lawsuit. He says they never talked though. He found the door open and walked in. He called out for Nicholas and then heard noises and went to investigate, finding a broken window and wrecked room. He says he heard the window break when he was in the hallway and saw a body on the rocks below. Jordan asks if it appeared that Nicholas had fallen to his death. Jason says he doesn’t know, but Jordan says he knows more than he’s saying and she thinks he pushed Nicholas.

Sonny tells Ava that if he can’t trust her to be civil to his wife, how can he trust her with his daughter? Ava apologizes and says she hopes they can make peace for Avery’s sake. Carly goes to get Avery. Ava thanks Sonny, but he says if she screws up again, it’s over.

Hayden is like, I’m half Nicolas’s size, how could I push him out a window? Elizabeth says maybe she caught him off guard. Hayden says she wasn’t even there when it happened, but Elizabeth says maybe she had someone else do it.

Diane says Jordan isn’t asking questions, just making baseless accusations. After finding out that Diane is also representing Sam, Jordan asks her about Nicholas and Jason’s conversation about the lawsuit. Sam acts like she came in right behind Jason and Jordan asks if Sam heard the same noises. She says she has surveillance footage that belies what they’re both telling her.

Jordan shows the video in which Sam arrived seven minutes after Jason.

Hayden says Elizabeth looks paranoid and unreliable. Lulu and Dante come running in looking for Laura. Elizabeth tells them she’s with the detectives, so they leave. Now that I think of it, maybe Elizabeth pushed Nicholas out the window. What’s she doing there anyway?

Dillon says he was afraid Kiki would think she made a mistake. She asks if he feels that way and he says no. She says she finally feels like she can breathe. She says she likes spending time with him a lot, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t on the rebound. He says that’s not necessarily bad and they can take things at a snail’s pace. He wants to take her on a date. She says what about the concert, but Dillon says she’ll be more of an assistant there. She says he makes her life uncomplicated and he says he hopes that isn’t code for boring, but she tells him it’s just what she needs.

Ava says she got the message loud and clear. Carly brings Avery down and Ava takes her. Um…we hear crying sounds, but Avery isn’t crying. Note to director: I get that kids don’t always do what you want, but try to make it somewhat believable – like maybe don’t show us her face at that point. She leaves and Carly is like, what’s up with that? Sonny tells her to calm down and explains about how they’d cut AJ out of Michael’s life and made a mess of things. He says Ava might manipulate Avery during visits, but she’ll come home to them, and when she starts rebelling as a teenager, who knows about rebelling better than them? He says this way everything will be up front.

Ava takes Avery to visit Kiki at the MetroCourt.

Diane tells Jordan the interview is over. Jordan tells Sam to rethink her statement. Diane says the PCPD has a history of bias against her client and Jordan needs to stop running to a rash judgment. Jordan says Diane’s assurances are the best that money can buy, but are meaningless to her. She leaves and Jason asks how much trouble he’s in. Diane says seven minutes is a lot, especially combined with their previous altercations. She says she believes him, but a jury might not. She says she’d have to convince them that he wanted to make peace because of his late sister, but hopes it doesn’t come to that. She says now that he’s starting to remember things, to remember that he’s always been her favorite client, and not just because he paid on time.

Ava explains that she and Sonny came to an understanding. Kiki says she’s proud of her and takes Avery to the kitchen for “something yummy.” Dillon congratulates Ava. She says ditto for helping Kiki get over Morgan.

Carly says it sucks when your worst mistakes come back to bite you, but they can’t let the same thing happen to Avery that happened to Michael. Sonny thanks her for getting the video, since now it’s all on his terms. She leaves for the hospital.

Hayden asks if Elizabeth thinks she has Nicholas stashed away playing pinochle with Jimmy Hoffa and Amelia Earhart. Elizabeth brings Hayden’s father into it and says she’s responsible for what happened to Nicholas and is going to pay.

Dante tells Spencer it’s still being considered a search and rescue. Spencer says considering all the factors, it’s doubtful his father is still alive. Laura says he’s in denial, but I think he’s being the way he always is – precocious. He tells Hayden that even if Nicholas is gone, she still has him. Precocious, but cute.

Elizabeth wants Jordan to arrest Hayden for Nicholas’s murder. On no grounds whatsoever.

Jason tells Sam he’s not sticking around to get arrested.

Tomorrow, Nathan talks in his sleep, Finn visits Hayden, Sam decides to go with Jason.

The Real Housewives of New York City

The Countess insists that she and Bethenny came up with the Skinny Girl idea together. We flash way back and no, they didn’t. The Countess changes the subject to Bethenny’s love life. Bethenny says that when the Countess asks you about who you’re dating, you enter the witness protection program.

Bethenny goes over to talk to Ramona. The Countess can hear her and says Bethenny is basically a bully and goes on to say Bethenny copied her haircut. In her interview, Dorinda says Bethenny is like a sniper once you get in her sights. Carole arrives in the middle of this and thinks Bethenny is arguing with John at first.

Carole says if she’d known the Countess was coming, she would have stayed home. She talks privately to Dorinda and says she doesn’t want to hang out with the Countess, but she’s not going to a hotel. In her interview, Dorinda swears she told Carole the Countess was going to be there and I thought she had too.

Ramona talks about the Countess breaking girl code by not checking if Ramona was done with dating Tom before she swooped down on him. The Countess won’t let her finish a sentence, and this is probably the first time I’m on Ramona’s side in thinking that she should be heard.

Bethenny talks to Jules about the Countess and hears the Countess talking about the hair thing. Bethenny interrupts and somehow drags Grey Gardens into it, which make me laugh. Bethenny says the Countess pretends to be something she’s not. The Countess says she’s been nothing but gracious, and wonders what Bethenny’s problem is. Bethenny says their friendship hasn’t evolved because the Countess isn’t a girl’s girl and she’s a hypocrite. She says the Countess sleeps with everyone and pretends she doesn’t. Whoa. Bethenny calls her a slut, a liar and a snake. Double whoa. In her interview, Bethenny says even she can’t believe the words that are coming out of her mouth.

Ha-ha! The housekeeper is trying to remain unobtrusive, moving things around in the kitchen while she’s really listening. In her interview, Dorinda says Bethenny isn’t being very respectful of her as a hostess and I agree. She just keeps going on and on, and says Sonja told her the Countess brings home a million guys. The Countess brings up the haircut again. SMH.

Bethenny tells everyone she’s lost her mind and needs to lie down. Dorinda asks why she’s being so crazy and Bethenny says she can’t take bullshit. Jules goes outside to call her father and the rest of the girls congregate in Bethenny’s room. The Countess approaches Jules and says she can’t stay here. Jules tells her there are bigger problems, like her father having pneumonia. The Countess doesn’t listen at all and just keeps talking about being called a whore and how Dorinda didn’t defend her.

Dorinda comes out and the Countess says thanks a lot. She talks about what both Bethenny and Ramona said. Dorinda says she didn’t hear all of it and in her interview says it’s not her job to defend the Countess. The Countess says she’s leaving if Bethenny can’t back up what she said. Um…she kind of did that.

Meanwhile, Ramona and Bethenny are going over the haircut business. Bethenny says poor Dorinda can’t have a normal party. She says Ramona must be thrilled she’s not at the center of the drama. Although she is a part of it. Jules comes in and repeats what the Countess told her and how unaware she was of Jules’s immediate need.

Everyone is hanging out on the bed when the Countess walks in and says she’s leaving. She says she thought they were there to have a good time. She talks to Ramona in the kitchen. She keeps saying she’s leaving, but doesn’t go anywhere. She goes on about how Dorinda says it wasn’t her birthday celebration even thought there’s a birthday cake on the counter. Well, if she’d listened, Dorinda said the cake had been around for a while.

Dorinda comes in and tells her to get a grip, because her mother bought the cake. She thinks everyone is acting poorly when she put in so much effort. On top of it, she didn’t invite Sonja, hoping to avoid drama. She says they should have all just kept their gripes to themselves; she’s ashamed and if they can’t behave, they need to go home. I can’t say that I blame her one bit. This wasn’t even like they’d been there a while and were maybe drunk and/or sick of each other. They started out of the gate this way.

Dorinda tells them they’re adults and this is her home. She brings up the cake again and tells them to drop the subject because she looks at it like a personal affront to her mother. The Countess can’t seem to shut her mouth about her feelings. She’s wearing one of those leather vests with fur trim and it looks like she’s trying to dress too young.

Everyone gets a grip and they open presents. They all get games. In her interview, Bethenny says she doesn’t like that side of herself, and she’s no stranger to people trying to claim what’s hers. In her interview, Carole says she agrees with Bethenny, but her delivery stinks. To break the mood, it’s discovered that Ramona’s dog has made poopy all over the place.

In Sonjaland, Sonja is having some things tightened, while she thinks the other girls are off having a fabulous dinner. I go ♫ la-la-la ♫ when they go over what’s being tightened. The doctor starts talking about a probe and I la-la louder. OMG – they’re doing the procedure right in front of us and nobody wants to see this.

Bethenny says she always goes back to compassion and regret with the Countess. but it’s been a decade of nonsense. We go down Memory Lane with some clips. Carole and Ramona talk about the Countess. Dorinda joins them, followed by the Countess. Carole thinks everyone feels uncomfortable except the Countess, which is ironic since she’s the one causing the friction. Dorinda decides to take a nap and Carole talks to Jules in the hallway, but they end up eavesdropping. Ramona asks if the Countess is sorry she called Carole a pedophile for dating her niece’s 28-year-old ex. Ramona tells her that she has to apologize.

The Countess decides to send a marginally funny text and asks Jules how to spell pedophile when she comes in to pick up her bag, which Carole does not find amusing. The Countess and Ramona play pool, while Jules and Carole have drinks and mess around on the laptop. Ramona asks if Carole has gotten a text from her recently because she wants her to see what the Countess sent, but she hasn’t. It would be really funny if the Countess sent it to someone else. Particularly a male friend.

Dorinda and Bethenny talk relationships, while Ramona tries to explain why Bethenny is upset to the Countess. In her interview, Ramona says the Countess never wants to own up to anything and the Countess keeps saying it was just a misunderstanding. Much like people use the word “miscommunication” when they’ve screwed up. The Countess texts Bethenny because no one can actually talk face to face when it involves an apology.

Both Bethenny and Carole get the texts. Bethenny tells Carole that hers is the weirdest text she’s ever heard. Carole says the Countess can’t be trusted. Bethenny is still astounded at her own tirade. Ramona joins them.

The Countess tells Dorinda the bottom line is that Tom likes her better than Ramona. Maybe so, but she should have talked to Ramona first. She asks who is Bethenny to be judging her. She thinks Bethenny is unhappy and jealous of her happiness. Suddenly, Bethenny is standing there and asks if this is part of the apology. D’oh!

Next time, the argument continues, more holiday festivities and apologies, and Sonja goes off like a rocket.

May 25, 2016 – Nurses Ball Two & Three Times the NYC

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

So cute! Emma and Ned..er…Eddie Maine start off with Don’t Go Breakin’ My Heart. Did they practice over the phone? Lucy gives a speech about the Quartermaines and Scorpios, and how they give their time, talent, and treasure for good. She claims there will be no stage crashing tonight and that problem is solved.

Epiphany finds Obrecht tied up and gagged in a bathroom stall. “Untie me at once…please?” Obrecht says. Hahahaha! Epiphany asks what she’s wearing and Obrecht says it’s a costume. Epiphany tells her she’s not performing this year, but I think that’s up for debate now.

Carly says Ava’s ass is hers.

Laura runs into Doc.She doesn’t have a ticket, but Doc has two. Amazing! She wonders if they missed much and he says whatever’s happened already will most likely not be as crazy as what’s ahead. Undoubtedly.

Lucy plugs Aveeno, who is their sponsor this year, an tells everyone to mingle in between acts, which is totally weird.

Hayden wants to talk to Jordan who tells her to make an appointment. Nicholas whisks her away.

Lucas finds Bobbie passed out backstage. She comes to and he wants to take her to the hospital, but she refuses. He refuses to take her refusal and says, let’s go.

Carly catches Ava in the bathroom. She says Ava is going to give up sole custody of Avery. Ava tells her she’s drunk or delusional. She says she’s going back to the party, and Carly says the party is in her phone. It’s not the confession she wanted, but a video of Paul and Ava in a bondage scene. Although, I’m not sure how this could really be held against Ava, since they’re both single, consenting adults, and it’s not like Avery was in the room. Ava says Carly broke into her home. Carly says she’ll post the video online if Ava doesn’t give her what she wants. Ava tells her to loosen up and leaves. Well, that backfired.

Franco asks Jake how he feels about making his debut. Jake says he has butterflies and Franco tells him to imagine the audience is quacking ducks. Jason isn’t happy about Franco being around Jake. Sam says the more he remembers the more he’ll hate Franco, and Jason says he already does.

Lucy continues to try and talk Griff into being in the show. She asks Epiphany if she’s seen Lucas, but she hasn’t. Lucas grabs Amy and tells her to tell Brad not to worry; he has to take Bobbie to the hospital. Lucy asks Jake to go on early.

Finn sees Obrecht back at the hospital and says he thought she was attending the ball. She says she did too, and I’m surprised she gave up that easy.

Jake goes on and freezes. Elizabeth tells him he can do this. Franco gets on stage and tells him, “Quack,” and they quack back and forth. Franco plays percussion while Jake sings. Franco helps him with the chorus too, and Nina gets verklempt.

Lucas wheels Bobbie into the hospital. Finn tells her she has vertigo. (Me too.) Lucas wants to postpone the wedding, but Bobbie tells him to go.

Carly sends the video to Paul and tells him to make Ava get in line. He grabs Ava and tells her to make it go away. She says a little sex scandal never hurt anyone. He says he could lose his job and he still has the confession. He tells her to do what Carly wants.

It’s Magic Milo and His Magic Wands! Curtis, Griff, Dillon and Felix also participate. For Griff suddenly getting pulled in at the last minute, he knows all the steps. Was he a dancer before he was a priest? I think so, since he can break dance like a pro. I applaud when their butts spell out Nurses Ball.

Ava slaps the phone out of Carly’s hand, but she still has the flash drive. Ava takes her shoes off . She and Carly wrestle. They must have laughed like crazy practicing this scene.

Obrecht asks why Finn was drummed out of his last job. He says he quit. She asks what he’s hiding and he says wouldn’t she like to know.

Nicholas drags Hayden away from Jordan again. Curtis sees it and thinks maybe he should say something. Valerie tells him to go; he can make it up to her later. Curtis finds them out in the hall and tells Nicholas to let Hayden go.

Someone is injecting Bobbie with something in the dark, but Lucas comes back into the room and asks what’s going on.

Jason wants to stop Elizabeth from hanging around Franco. Diane comes in and tells him he’s being sued. She says the money he used to get the ELQ stock came from organized crime. The IRS has frozen ELQ’s assets.

Ava gets the flash drive and flushes it down the toilet. Carly tells her it’s in the cloud and she’s about to lose custody of Avery.

Uh-oh, it’s time for the wedding and Lucas isn’t back yet. And stupid Amy never gave Brad the message. This is going to look like Lucas stood Brad up.

Lucas is unconscious beside Bobbie’s bed.

…to be continued.

Little Women NY

It’s time to clean up the camp, but Jazmin has to get something off her chest. She whips out a video of Katie and Jess having a cigarette. Lila makes mention of Katie taking a long drag. Yeah, that’s because she probably doesn’t have one too often. She also says something about Katie’s belly being tiny and relating that to cigarettes and low birth weight. For the love of all that’s holy, I can’t believe this girl took a video and involved the entire group when she has no idea about anything. If you’re so concerned, how about just taking Katie to the side and asking her about it? I swear, I’d smoke just to spite them. this bunch is nosier than the Housewives.

PJ comes to the city. Jess isn’t thrilled to find him in the apartment when she just wants to unwind after the camping trip. Katie realizes Jess isn’t happy, but says she needs all the help she can get since it’s getting close to baby time. They’re also getting evicted because the landlord found out about Jess’s dog. Nice welcome home.

Dawn is still pissed about the fight she and Lila got into. They meet for tea and Lila apologizes, saying she needs to be mindful that Dawn is a person with feelings. Maybe if Dawn acted like a human more often, she wouldn’t forget. Dawn says she ended up talking with Jazmin at the campsite and thinks they’ve resolved things. She also wants to talk to David, since apparently they have unresolved issues.

The gang is inviting Katie and Jess to Dawn’s place for a barbecue that’s really an intervention. Since Lila has been the object of one herself, she tells everyone several scenarios can happen. They role play. Lila says, as Katie already feels judged, she might not believe it’s coming from a good place. While I realize they are coming from a good place, I’m not down with this for that exact reason. They have picked on this girl mercilessly since day one. They’re probably the reason she’s smoking.

Lila says if it doesn’t seem genuine, and just seems critical, it’s not going to go well. When Jazmin asks what’s the worst hat can happen, Lila says Katie could fire up a cigarette and say f-u, and I laugh. At least she knows what she might be in for. Katie and Jess arrive and Jess tells the gang about how she came home to PJ. I’d be a lot angrier about the dog than him.

Jazmin jumps right in and asks if she’s smoking. Katie says once in a while when she’s stressed, she takes a drag. Katie says her doctor told her not to cut it cold turkey, she weaned herself down, and she’s not a serious smoker anymore. Jazmin says she’s around Jess smoking too. Katie says her mother has lectured her, but it helps with her stress. Lila says she’s an addict and she’s bigger than cigarettes and to not let them control her. It all seems much more dramatic than it should be. Lila tells Katie about her father dying from lung disease. Katie says after the baby is born, she’s going to quit. Dawn chimes in that the baby is inhaling cigarettes now. Jazmin tells Jess she shouldn’t be an enabler. Jess says they shouldn’t attack Katie like that, and they’re not acting in a way that she would feel she could trust them. In her interview, Jess says Jazmin should have just taken them aside. At least she didn’t pull out the video.

Katie says she’s feeling crampy and uncomfortable and decides to leave. Lila asks for her cigarettes, but she doesn’t have any. So how much of a smoker can she be? She actually shows Lila her purse. Lila asks Jess for hers – seriously? – but that’s a no. These idiots just crashed and burned with their own good intentions.

When they get back to the apartment, Katie and Jess tell PJ about the intervention. Katie says the baby has been healthy throughout the pregnancy and she felt judged. Katie says not once did they ask what kind of stress she’s under or how they can help. Good point. In her interview, Jess says she bit her tongue this afternoon, but when she sees them all again, she can’t promise anything.

Jason’s father is a vet and Jess is bringing her dog for a free check-up. Because, free check-up. He asks how Katie is doing and Jess says she wasn’t happy with how things were done and she isn’t happy either. Jason says they were coming from a place of concern, but Jess says it didn’t look that way. Jason intimates that Jess has never said anything to Katie about smoking and Jess says he has no idea what she’s said to Katie and she’s not going to ride her ass.

Pup ChiChi has a cough, so of course Jason has to make a joke about smoking. Jess is like, don’t get too familiar. Jason’s father says ChiChi checks out, so just give it time. Jason says he’s trying to get out of the city a bit and asks if Jess and Katie would like to come pumpkin picking with the group. She’s not committing until she talks to Katie.

David arrives. He’s been working out of town. Jazmin tells him that she and Dawn mended fences, which makes him happy, although he wonders how long it will last. She tells him about the pumpkin picking event. She says she won’t bring up the smoking thing again, but feels like she should have been more aggressive. Geez, I guess it wasn’t enough that they basically drove Katie away.

Jess and Katie find a new apartment. Jess says good thing it’s bigger, since they have to fit three adults, a baby and a dog. She says the gang is feeling good about themselves and they left feeling like crap. She thinks Jason and Jazmin were coming from a good place, but not so much the others. She tells PJ and Katie about the pumpkin thing. She says they should go, so it doesn’t look like “they won.” PJ says just go and have a good time, and if they have something to say, they’ll hear what he has to say. Katie says that’s what she’s afraid of. Ha-ha!

It’s pumpkin festival time! Katie introduces PJ to the group. Jazmin is hoping he puts a ring on it, since he followed Katie all the way to NYC. The last time Dawn saw David, they had a huge fight, so she asks if they’re good. David says she puts him in an awkward position when she fights with Jazmin, but she feels she and Jazmin are in a good place now. She still has some issues with David, and invites him to have family time.

Katie picks up a small pumpkin, and several of the others immediately get on her case. They also think PJ should have stopped her. They do some kind of weird panning for gold thing and Lila asks if PJ might find an engagement ring. The others wonder why Katie looks stressed. Really? Lila wonders if PJ is causing her stress. No, it’s you. She and Dawn want answers. Who the blip do they think they are> Scotland Yard? OMG – Lila asks PJ what makes a eight month pregnant woman leave her baby’s father? How freaking nosy can you get?

Lila says PJ is all talk and no substance. I fail to see how she could deduce that after meeting him for five minutes. Jess asks the group if they feel that they handled the intervention correctly. She grills Jazmin as to whether she asked Katie personally about it first. Of course not. Jess thinks it wasn’t necessary to go to such an extreme. She and Jazmin argue. The whole thing makes Katie want a cigarette. Dawn says she’s sorry they put her on the spot, but they wanted to make sure Katie knew the score. Then they get on PJ’s case for letting Katie pick up the pumpkin. Jess asks why they think their opinion matters. Dawn says they’re arguing whether or not a pregnant woman should smoke, so I guess she’s in a different argument. PJ thinks if atie has half a cigarette, she’s doing well, and that pisses Dawn off more.

Katie goes to sit down and Jess talks to her. The group tries to get in on that, and Jess tells them to go away. Katie is cramping because she’s stressed out. Jason wanted to have a nice day out, but obviously, that’s not happening.

Two minutes from now, strip club time, Dawn and David argue, and Katie has a baby shower.

Little Women NY

I have no clue why they’re having back-to-back episodes tonight and destroying my TV viewing time frame.

PJ and Katie are doing a pregnancy photo shoot. During a break, Jess talks to Katie about a baby shower guest list. Katie is okay with everyone except Lila. Jess agrees that she’s a mean girl, but is also a little person with insecurity issues. Jess is adamant about not wanting her there.

Dawn visits Katie who wonders why she’s there. ChiChi makes a weewee, and Dawn acts like it’s unheard of. Dawn apologizes for the pumpkin patch debacle. Katie says she’s stressed about not being prepared for the baby and Dawn thinks that should be the father’s department. He just got there, for goodness’ sake. Katie invites her to the shower, although I don’t know why. I’d leave that one off the list too.

Jess meets Jazmin and Jason for lunch to plan the shower. Jess says she has no hard feelings, but isn’t feeling it with Dawn and Lila. Black and pink are the colors and butterflies are wanted. She tells them Lila is a no as a guest. Jazmin thinks that’s a bad idea. Too bad. Jess says it’s Katie’s day and that’s what she wants.

Dawn and Lila go shopping. Dawn talks to Lila about Katie. She says Katie’s house is filthy. What? They just moved in and it actually looked pretty together to me. Dawn talks about the shower and says she got an invite. Lila says she wants to be there for Katie, and says she wants to come along. Even though she’s not invited. Again, what is with these people? News flash, don’t ever show up to a party you’re not invited to. It’s that simple. And how dare she stress this poor pregnant woman even more?

Commercial break. Ha-ha! It’s for Nicorette. And then Haagan-Daas. Which you’ll want in place of that cigarette.

Katie has gone to her check-up. She’s been given the option to have the baby in five days or two weeks. She wants to hold out as long as possible and PJ says to let the doctor do his job. She wants to be able to bring the baby straight home, but they weren’t able to get an ultrasound and she doesn’t know the baby’s weight.

David goes to Dawn’s place. They have snacks and make small talk. She says she misses him. He says ditto, but it’s not like they spend so much time together that they’re close. Dawn says part of her holds resentment that their mother was battling cancer for two years and she was by herself dealing with it. She whines that she’s always alone and David asks if she’s ever considered why that is.

He asks where she was when he got thrown out and was living on the street. She says that was their mother’s decision and he says he’d lost a job and was homeless for five years. She acts like an asshat and he says he’s done, have a nice life, and leaves.

Dawn calls Lila to come over. She tells Lila what happened. I guess it was okay for her to criticize him, but he wasn’t allowed to do the same. Lila tries to explain that David was abandoned. She wants Dawn to understand where he’s coming from. Dawn sobs that this is what she gets for showing vulnerability. Lila says she often has trouble seeing someone else’s viewpoint. Ya think? Dawn says he should be understanding of her. She says she feels isolated and Lila says she has to move forward, and that family is everything. Dawn says if family is everything, why did David walk out? Lila has no answer.

Jazmin asks David what happened. David tells her about Dawn saying he wasn’t there when their mother was going through treatment. Jazmin says Dawn plays the pity card a lot, but won’t own up to her own stuff. He says he’s finally at peace with both his parents passing, but Dawn still has issues. IMO, she’s a walking issue. The poster child for issues.

Jess and Jazmin take Jason to a gay bar. Jazmin says he barely goes out since he started dating DJ. Jason asks why he’s there and Jazmin says to have fun. In his interview, he says he’s not married, but not single either, and isn’t sure how to deal with that. It’s not exactly a strip club, but there are guys in underwear running about and dancing with the patrons. They do more shots than my entire neighborhood bar on karaoke night. Someone sends a lemon drop over to Jason. He says he’s never had a stranger buy him a drink before. The guy slips Jason his number.

Jason wakes up with a puppy in his face and a hangover, hoping he didn’t embarrass himself. Jazmin shows him the number he garnered. He wonders if he should tell DJ, since their relationship is already strained with DJ living in another state. Jazmin thinks she should tell him. I’m on the fence. It’s not like he called the number and he didn’t ask for the number either. On the other hand, these girls have big mouths.

Katie’s mom, Kathie, comes to help. Katie starts to cry and says she just wants the baby to be healthy and doesn’t want her to come out too early. Without knowing the baby’s weight, they don’t know when is the best time to deliver. Kathie says Katie’s father would be proud and he’s looking down at her from heaven. She thinks everything will be fine. Yeah, I think Katie is just hormonal. And stressed from the twits she’s been hanging around with.

DJ comes to see Jason. Jason says they’ve always been honest with each other, but he feels guilty about something. He tells DJ about going dancing with the girls at the bar. He says he got a number, and to him it was innocent, but he doesn’t want DJ to find out some other way and be hurt. DJ asks why he went with the girls and not him. Jason says DJ doesn’t really like dancing and he doesn’t want to pressure him. DJ thanks him for being honest, but says he still wishes Jason had asked him to come.

It’s baby shower time! Katie’s doctor is finally back and wants her to come in for an ultrasound, so she’s going to be late to her own party. Jason and Jazmin get there early to help with the decorations. It’s like an explosion of pink. Even ChiChi is wearing a pink butterfly outfit. Jess tells them that it’s possible Katie might have to deliver today, but the shower is on unless she hears otherwise. Jazmin wants to know if PJ is stepping up to the plate, but Jess hasn’t seen him doing much to help. Jazmin asks if he wants the baby, and Jess says she thinks it’s just sinking in.

Guests start to arrive and Jess hopes she gets news soon, since she doesn’t know how long she can entertain everyone. Dawn and Lila arrive, with Lila announcing she’s there for the party and everyone loves a baby shower. I dunno about that. A shower is one of those things that’s great…if it’s yours.

You can hear a pin drop. Jess says who shows up for a party they’re not invited to. Jess asks Lila if she spoke to Katie unbeknownst to her. Lila says Dawn told her about it and she wanted to give the baby a gift. Dawn concurs that she invited her. Jess says it’s not Dawn’s party, it’s Katie’s, and Katie didn’t want Lila there. There’s a bit of an argument and Dawn acts high and mighty in her interview. Like it’s all about the baby. Even the baby wouldn’t want them there. Jason brings up when Lila kicked Terra out of their party, which is exactly what I was thinking about. In her interview, Jazmin says they shouldn’t be arguing in front of everyone, which I agree with. Jess finally takes Lila in another room. Lila says if Katie starts cramping, she’ll leave, and Jess says oh yeah, let it get to that point. I’m pretty stunned. Lila won’t even let Jess talk. Lila tells her to keep the Jameson to a minimum when the baby comes. Jess says not everyone is a drunk like Lila. Lila finally leaves with Jess shouting she doesn’t know how many times she has to tell Lila that Katie doesn’t want her there.

Next time, Jason brings up Terra again to Lila, Lila argues with Jason, Katie argues with Dawn, and Lila and might go into labor.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Dorinda and Jules are shopping. Dorinda has Bethenny in a gift exchange. Ramona is going to be there (Jules has her), and she and Dorinda didn’t exactly leave things on a good note. Jules hates confrontation and stayed out of the way. Dorinda says Ramona needs to grow up and be respectful. She says she’ll be cordial, but she’s done with the apologies. Her mother said have people who warm you, but don’t burn you. Actually I paraphrased, but I think mine is better.

Bethenny is having a holiday cavier party. I cry because I’d love to go to something like that. Carole and Jules are there, along with some other friends of Bethenny’s. Ramona comes waltzing in and wants a margarita, after which she has an unbelievable story.

The Countess is out with Sonja. Sonja says they rarely see each other because The Countess is always out. The talk about that weird guy from the party. OMG, TMI. The Countess says she went out with him a couple of times, but realized something was “off” with him and she’s too old to deal with hot messes. She says he was pissed and that’s why he was aggressive at the party.

Ramona tells the girls about the same weird guy. She acts like nothing was wrong and John just came over to kick him out. She also pretends that John just put his hand in her face for no reason out of the blue. Not that I think he should have done that, but she had a hand in it too, no pun intended. Well, maybe a little. She says Dorinda was freaking out, but suddenly, Jules says she has a different story. Jules says she’s leaving out the part about the guy causing The Countess to be uncomfortable and how weird and drunk he was.

The Countess tells Sonja that Dorinda told her she’s done with Ramona. She says there isn’t one cute guy at the bar, and Sonja says they’ll look better after another drink. Geez.

Dorinda comes to the party. Bethenny meets her at the door and tells her that Ramona is sorry. Dorinda says she’s feeling overwhelmed and trying to pretend everything is good. Bethenny tells her that she should spend some quiet time alone for herself.

Ramona shovels in the caviar. Dorinda enters the party, ignoring Ramona. Ramona tries to engage her. In her interview, Ramona says she’s going to pretend everything is fine. Everyone eats caviar on tiny pancakes. Dorinda invites the girls to the Berkshires where she wants to have a holiday party. She’s not inviting Sonja because she thinks her drinking will lead to drama.

Carole talks to Dorinda on the side. Carole thinks it’s sad that Dorinda and Ramona’s friendship has been disrupted by a guy. Dorinda talks to Ramona, who says she’s not going anywhere, but Dorinda says it’s a one-sided deal now. They open their gifts, a lot of which are funny.

Sonja wonders who The Countess’s mystery man is. The Countess says Dorinda introduced them and he’s special, so she’s keeping him under wraps. She says in her interview that his name is Tom and I guess this is the guy she’s engaged to now. The Countess sees that there’s an article about the weird guy and Ramona at the party in The Post. It says Ramona was thrown out of the party. The Countess thinks Ramona had some nerve talking about her being a bad influence. More TMI with these two. It’s a constant.

Dorinda meets with Sonja, who has a fanny pack that look like a pair of lips. I wish I would have had that in my Rocky Horror days. They hang out on a park bench. I assume Central Park. Sonja says she wanted to talk to Dorinda about Ramona, who she thinks is going psycho. She’s been telling Sonja that no one wants to invite her out because of her drinking when Ramona can kick it back.

First, Dorinda tells Sonja she’s coming from a good place, so you know it’s going to be bad news. She talks about doing the Berkshires thing and she says she doesn’t want to do it now. She says she doesn’t think Sonja needs to be around the ladies right now, so she’s having them up for dinner, but having Sonja separately. She says she’d rather do one-on-one with her. In her interview, Sonja seems to think it has something to do with Bethenny.

The Countess and Tom have dinner with Dorinda, John, Jules and Michael. She thought they would be supportive, while she wasn’t so sure about the others. They talk about Ramona and Tom looks scared. Oh, wait, he actually knows Ramona. The Countess says Ramona went out with him, but nothing romantic went on, which I guess means they didn’t sleep together. He says he’s known Dorinda for years, and when he was on the phone with her, she suddenly handed the phone to The Countess. John makes an inappropriate comment. Everyone ignores it since they’re used to this. He says they’ve been inseparable since their first date. The Countess says she’s protecting their relationship because the girls can be catty. They have a toast.

They show NYC at Christmastime, which is my favorite time of year there. It’s out to the Berkshires though. Ramona gets there first, along with her dog. Dorinda tells Ramona it’s her sanctuary, where she likes to go for the silence she doesn’t get in the city. They talk about Sonja and how The Countess is never at home. Dorinda alludes to who The Countess’s man is, and in her interview, Ramona says she dated him.

Ramona thinks it’s rude that The Countess hasn’t told her about Tom, since for all she knows, Ramona could still be involved. Hardly. It would probably be in The Post. Yikes. Ramona’s dog made poopy all over Dorinda’s carpet. Dorinda tells her own dog to crap all over Ramona’s place in the Hamptons. Ha-ha!

Everyone else arrives. The Countess thinks there will be drama. In her interview, she says she and Carole are “uncool.” Jules says she plays piano and The Countess threatens to sing. Jules’s father is in the hospital with pneumonia. Since the nanny quit last week, things haven’t been peachy. The Countess tells Dorinda that Sonja feels excluded. Dorinda doesn’t think it would be a good combo with Bethenny being there and Sonja drinking. Ramona thinks Sonja should work on herself.

Bethenny arrives. The Countess says Bethenny is copying her hairstyle. Maybe. The Countess says she’s staying with Sonja when she’s not staying with her new guy. Bethenny asks if it’s Ramona’s ex and The Countess is cagey. The Countess says she thinks Sonja needs her right now she’s trying to mentor Sonja, which Bethenny says it’s like the blind leading the deaf [sic] and she finds it hysterically funny. The Countess says Sonja and Bethenny have issues about the Tipsy Girl thing and it was in The Post. Bethenny says she doesn’t care so much about the name, but pick one and go with it – either you’re smart or you’re stupid. She says Sonja used her for free publicity. The Countess says the newspaper claimed Bethenny was suing Sonja, but Bethenny says that’s not true.

Bethenny says a lot of people have copied her and she was the first one to come up with the name. The Countess says that she actually thought it up. Bethenny says she must be right, since that’s what she goes around telling everyone.

Next time, Bethenny and The Countess argue, Ramona and The Countess argue, and Dorinda tells everyone to go home.

May 18, 2016 – GH, Big Apple Little Women & Wives

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

I had a late lunch with a friend and missed it. I tried watching it On Demand, but for some reason, the picture and sound kept breaking up. Thanks, Verizon! Finally, I caught it on Hulu, so here are the highlights I grasped while I was doing three other things.

Laura returns to the disco – she and Doc pretend like they’re going to buy it. As if the realtor would still have the disco ball hanging there. And the sparkly crepe paper, which hasn’t aged.

Tracy insists the baby is just some random child who was left there, but Michael asks her what would be the odds of anyone leaving a baby on their doorstep? He has a good point, and that baby looks very Spanish, which narrows the odds even more.

Felix wants Finn to participate in the Nurses Ball. I can’t say enough good things about Michael Easton in this role. He’s been far too serious for far too long on One Life to Live and then GH. He hasn’t had any fun since vamping it up in Port Charles.

Hayden tries to get Nicholas to help her take photos of the stuff she wants to sell online. She says New York is a community property state, so it’s their stuff. I like seeing these two back together again. They have a lot of chemistry, and Hayden brings out a side of Nicholas that Elizabeth certainly doesn’t.

Laura tells Doc about Luke raping her at the disco, and tries to justify it somewhat. Will we never get away from this? To his credit, Doc tells her not to blame herself. GH dug a hole for itself with this one years ago and they keep reopening it. Laura says she has no regrets and nothing Helena can do will change that. Doc says Helena is just playing mind games. Laura says Helena is probably looking up at her – hahahaha! – instead of looking down on her.

Jason visits Sonny and tells him he remembers everything now. We trip down Memory Lane. Jason apologizes for being a jerk, and Sonny says fuggedaboutit. Jason doesn’t exactly want to work for Sonny again, but tells him that he has Sonny’s back when it comes to Julian. Sonny says he’ll only ask if he has to and welcomes Jason home. Awww!

Finn gets into the drug cabinet via a clueless Felix, but we don’t see what, if anything, he takes. Tracy has him come to the Quartermaine mansion to check the baby and he suggests getting blood work done. Hayden pops in and asks for a job, since Nicholas shamed her into using her brain to make money. Tracy tells her to get lost. Tracy also has baby fever and names the baby Edward.

Diane brings the happy news to Nicholas that he owes back business taxes. I’m guessing he might not be responsible since he no longer owns the company, but I’m sure a lawsuit or prison is of concern if he doesn’t pony up. Nicholas acts like it’s a personal affront that Jason brought down on him. Diane suggests he sell some of his stuff on eBay if he can’t scratch up the cash.

The realtor says the disco is owned by Lloyd and Lucy Johnson, psudonyms of Luke and Laura at one time. Doc tells Laura that maybe they should be Lloyd and Lucy Johnson 2.0.

Michael takes the baby to the hospital when Tracy isn’t looking.

No preview.

The Real Housewives of NYC

I have the answer to Sonja’s question, if being Sonja is so wrong, why does it feel so right? Because you’re tipsy, girl. BA-DUM-CHH!

Sonja gets ready for The Countess’s arrival. She shows The Countess to the guest suite, which is pretty impressive. It’s a nice townhouse. The Countess says she thinks Sonja feels more stable with her around. She tells Sonja she wasn’t expecting the unveiling of the wine at Sonja’s birthday party. She asks if Sonja talked to Bethenny about the name of her product being thisclose to SkinnyGirl. Sonja claims that someone else came up with the name. Someone who must never have heard of Bethenny or the liquor line she manufactures.

Bethenny says she’s been dragged into the press with Sonja’s product. Ramona and Carole meet her for dinner. Apparently, Sonja has been saying Bethenny is her mentor and has set up a meeting with her. Bethenny says she saw the rip-off name on Page Six of the Post. She says her partners are seriously annoyed, especially after she brought Sonja into a business meeting to help her. They discuss Sonja’s narcissism, and Carole says this could cost Sonja a friendship.

Commercial break. I love The Real Housewives in Wonderland ads. I’m also wonder(land)ing what that’s about.

Ramona and Dorinda meet for breakfast. Ramona says she can’t quite accept John for Dorinda, but if she wants a relationship with Dorinda, she’s going to have to. Um…that’s right and wtf business is it of yours to accept anyone for anyone? Dorinda asks Ramona what she thinks about Tipsy Girl. Ramona says she’s disenchanted with her friendship with Sonja and doesn’t think tipsy anything is a good idea for her. Dorinda tries some cryptic talk about Ramona’s relationship with Sonja when she’s really talking about the both of them.

Somehow she changes the topic to her and John, and tells Ramona she has to respect that John is a part of her life. She doesn’t want to feel awkward any more. Ramona says she’s trying, but her mouth gets in the way. Dorinda tells her that if she can’t act like a normal adult, to pretend.

Bethenny was out until 4 am on her date. She says it’s someone she’s known for a while and it was a surprise to see potential. She’s at her office and Sonja comes by for the meeting. Sonja is thinking how wonderful it’s going to be to see each other. How can any human being possibly be this clueless?

Sonja tells Bethenny that her personal website has the same colors as Bethenny’s office. Funny you should say that. Bethenny brings up Tipsy Girl. She thinks Sonja’s partner, Peter, is shady. Sonja says he owns the rights to the name Tipsy Girl. Bethenny asks about Sonja’s distributors and Sonja can’t name one of them. This should come as a surprise to absolutely no one.

Sonja claims she was just testing out the product at her party. Bethenny says a similar brand name is called a cheater brand because it rides on the coattails of another brand. Bethenny says she’s personally hurt since she brought Sonja into her brand summit, and she wants nothing to do with her. She says Sonja never even contacted her until the Page Six article. She says that Sonja is a fraud who only talks a lot. Sonja yaps about her chapter 11 bankruptcy again and starts crying. She should cry. She says wah-wah-wah, she wasn’t going to do anything big, she just wanted something fun she could serve at her parties. Bethenny says she feels badly for her, but she’s tired of Sonja playing stupid and she can’t have it both ways. Sonja says she just wants to get back to where she was. Bethenny says she has compassion, but Sonja says she’s not feeling it. Bethenny says she has to get back to work, wishes her well, and says she’s not going to have any more conversation on the subject. Sonja acts innocent, but makes a snide remark in the elevator, and the interns roll their eyes.

Jules’s nanny has quit. She took her Christmas bonus and never came back, even though she’s been with them for two years. What are we missing? Jules is going to do some interviews. Jules go over responsibilities with the first one. Jules shows her around and asks her to pick out an outfit for one of the girls. It’s a thumbs up for the outfit, but a thumbs down on her Spanish skills, because they want the kids to be fluent. What I didn’t like about this process was that the first thing they did was have Michael check out her Spanish, which sounded pretty good to me, but she said she wasn’t fluent. If this was a make or break issue, why did Jules continue with the interview? Again, I feel like I missed something, but maybe these people just don’t communicate well.

Carole is fostering a kitten named Vinny. Adam is back and putting on his chef’s apron. She says when he was away she “cheated,” eating all kinds of junk food. Carole’s dog, Baby, really loves the kitten, but Carole is refusing to get attached.

She and Adam are working on a cookbook called The Reluctant Vegan – with her being reluctant and Adam being the vegan. This sounds like something I would enjoy. I’d like to be a vegan, but I’m reluctant to give up burgers and sushi. I think if Adam was cooking for me, I’d be a lot less reluctant. Carole says she’s been warned not to mix business with pleasure, but they’re doing it anyway.

The Countess meets Sonja and Ramona at Sushi Roxx. They talk about the Countess’s many dates. She claims to have gone through a dry spell and Ramona says she’d hate to see what a not-so-dry spell is like. Then comes the TMI and I go ♫ la-la-la! ♫

John and Dorinda are at an event to honor one of the designers John does business with. Jules and Michael are also attending.

The Countess asks what happened at Sonja’s meeting with Bethenny. Sonja tells her that she was surprised Bethenny was so critical. The Countess suggests Bethenny needs a boyfriend. The girls move on to John’s event. Dorinda didn’t give Ramona an invite and wonders why she’s there. The Countess sees a former flame who didn’t end well. The guy comes over and acts like a total asshat. The Countess freaks and decides to leave. The dude keeps talking to Sonja and Ramona, and he’ obviously three sheets to the wind. He has no concept of personal space either and John asks him to leave.

Ramona makes a stink and says everything is cool, so John says she can leave too. Asshat is catching and Ramona acts ridiculous. John actually keeps his cool pretty well, but then has enough and puts his hand in Ramona’s face. Ramona leaves with Mr. Personality.

Dorinda says Ramona isn’t even supposed to be there and wonders how she dare make a scene. She goes outside and tells Ramona she needs to respect her when she’s at John’s event. No surprise, Ramona acts like an idiot and Dorinda tells her to get lost. Ramona continues to act stupid and says she doesn’t know what happened and tries to blame John, who for once had very little to do with it. Ramona leaves and Dorinda hails a taxi. John tries to get her to stay. She says his actions are correct, but his reactions negate them, and he didn’t act like a gentleman.

Next time, Ramona’s idiocy makes the Post, another trip to the Bershires is planned, and Dorinda excludes Sonja.

Little Women: NYC

Oh no. I’m seeing the tale end of Briana and Matt: Part Two, and apparently they’re staying together. Good luck with that. For those who don’t know me, when I say that, the translation is, all the luck in the world isn’t going to help you.

Jazmin meets up with Jason at the park. They’re going on a walk so Jazmin can vent about Dawn. She says Dawn is making it impossible to have a relationship and wonders if it’s time to be done with her. Jason says there isn’t enough love behind Dawn’s tough love. He tells Jazmin that she’s not Dawn the second, she’s Jazmin the first. Jasmin says she’s damned if she does, and damned if she doesn’t; Dawn nags at her no matter what. Jason thinks there might be some resentment because Jazmin is married to Dawn’s only brother. He wants to invite Dawn to his family home for dinner, so she can see a different family dynamic.

Lila wants to play Switzerland and visits Dawn. Dawn thinks there’s too much pressure for her and Jazmin to be friends just because they’re outlaws inlaws. Since Dawn has the tact of a rock being thrown at someone’s head, she tells Lila how she couldn’t understand why Jazmin was upset when Dawn publicly criticized her lipstick color. Lila says she lacks charm and manners, and she should be nice for it’s own sake.

Dawn says that she and David were adopted. Their parents were little people and they had to fend for themselves often, so she thinks everyone should do the same.

Jason has Jazmin and Dawn over to his parents’ house for dinner. When Jazmin comes in, Dawn makes a face like she smelled something bad. She’s annoyed that Jason didn’t tell her that Jazmin was coming. Dawn talks blah-blah-blah about independence. Jason says it’s good to know friends are there if you need them, but Dawn says you don’t have to live with people to know that they’re there. She feels there’s a high expectation when it comes to family and talks more nonsense. Jazmin says family is family no matter what and Jason says relationships take work. Dawn says she feels like she’s being talked at. Since she’s constantly talking at people, it’s about time the tables turned. She can’t deal, so she leaves before dessert, claiming she has to work. Jason is concerned he made things worse.

Dawn keeps babbling how she and Jazmin don’t have to be best friends just because they’re related, but fails to understand that no one is asking them to. They would just like Dawn to act halfway friendly. She seems to have no concept that there’s a huge spectrum between strangers and BFFs.

Commercial break with important information. The UnReal season premiere is June 6.

Jason asks to stop by Dawn’s place. She says okay, but isn’t sure he has her best interest at heart. He asks why she left so abruptly and she makes up excuses. She says she felt ambushed and Jason says he doesn’t get it. She says she’s sick of everyone jumping into her and Jazmin’s relationship and asks why he didn’t tell her Jazmin was going to be there. He says because he knows Dawn and didn’t think she would come. Dawn says everyone should mind their own business.

Jason invites everyone to go camping. He seems to think a peaceful weekend outside of the city will refresh them. I’ve decided Dawn always looks like she smelled something bad.

Lila and Katie get together. Lila feels that Katie wasn’t given the warmest reception to the group, so she’s treating her to a pedicure. Tiny, cute toes! Katie asks if Lila remembers her from a convention years ago and that Lila wasn’t too nice. Lila tells her if it happens in the future, just let her know. Lila was probably drinking back then. She says they’re both going through stressful, emotional changes.

Lila talks about losing her dad and how he was her hero. Katie says she loved her dad too, and it’s hard knowing he won’t see his grandchild. Lila says she’s dreading the big life moments to come without her dad. I identify, since my father passed away shortly before I got married. Katie says she’s surprised by Lila’s support and understanding.

Katie is struggling to put together a crib. Jess comes in with a dog she adopted (GiGi), and Katie wonders if Jess is expecting her to take care of it when she isn’t there. Jess says funny you should say that, and tells her about the camping trip.

Let the camping commence! The gang loads up the car and Dawn pretends to be excited. She immediately tries to start an argument with Jazmin. Jason says it’s going to be a long trip. Jazmin says something has been weighing on her that involves Jess and she’s hoping to get a chance to discuss it with the others. Because God forbid she should actually discuss it with the person involved.

Dawn is a backseat driver, which is no surprise. Jason sees a possible bear food sacrifice in the future.

They get to a farmstead where they’ll be camping. It’s mega-cool and Jess says she can’t imagine anyone complaining about this place, even Dawn. They fight over who gets what bunk. It looks to me like whoever owns the farm built a bunkhouse to make some extra bucks. The owner explains they won’t be attacked by wild animals, which everyone seems concerned about. On a farm. Lookout for that chicken stampede!

Katie video chats with her baby daddy, PJ. She says she needs support and help, and that she loves him and wants them to be a family. PJ says it’s time for him to stop being a kid and understand that his own kid is coming. He says he’s here for her and the baby and is getting plane tickets immediately. Gee, that was easy.

Jess says that she knows Katie is going to be a great mom. She feels guilty for leaving Katie behind, but figures it will be crazy when the baby comes, so she’s getting in some relaxation. Jason has one last plan to make the bickering go away. He calls everyone outside. They’re going to light and release some lanterns and let go of the bad stuff and bring in the good times. Dawn asks if the lanterns are biodegradable.

Glad you asked, Dawn. Let me tell you about those lanterns. One of these landed in my backyard once. Still on fire. I can’t tell you how much I appreciated it. And how thankful I was that I happened to be there when it landed. So sorry to rain on Jason’s lantern parade, but I hate these things and think they’re a fire hazard. I’ll bet they’re bad for the dolphins too.

Lila wants to prank Jason, who is easily scared. She asks Jess to be her partner in crime. Lila dons a wolf mask; Jess is going to distract Jason. Lila sneaks up on his chair and he dumps hot tea on himself, but takes it like a champ. Everyone laughs except wet blanket Dawn. Lila says you can take the girl out of the city, but you can’t take the stick out of the girl’s ass. Ha-ha! She tells Dawn she has zero sense of humor which is probably true.

It’s time for s’mores and Debbie Downer Dawn says she can’t imagine putting a marshmallow on a stick and eating it. Jess makes fun of her and Dawn gets pissed at Lila for not defending her. She pulls Lila aside, which Jason says is never good, and proceeds to get totally out of control. Lila says she’s not always going to back Dawn, especially when she acts stupid. Whattsamatta, Dawn? Can’t be as independent as you would like your family members to be? I dub this poetic justice. Dawn says a friend to all is a friend to none (did she get that from Brownies or Blue’s Clues or something?). Then she adds that there’s no “i” in team, but there’s a “u” in see-you-next-Tuesday, which is what Lila is. Lila reacts mildly IMO, and says Dawn ostracizes herself all the time and calls her an a-hole. I’d say Lila showed some restraint there.

The next day, the Slip ‘N Slide is brought out. Everyone except Dawn plays around on it. Afterward, Jazmin thinks it might be a good time to talk to Dawn about their relationship, since Dawn is feeling alone. She apologizes for yelling at Dawn. She says that they don’t have to be best friends, but she’d like some support. Dawn says she loves Jazmin and David, and she doesn’t want to fight. They hug. In her interview, Jazmin says Dawn makes it hard to love her, but she’s family, and time will tell if she makes good on keeping the peace.

Jess goes to make a call and Jazmin wants to talk to everyone. She tells them she saw Jess and Katie smoking after belly dancing. She took a video and shows it to them. Oh. Horrors. Now, I’m not advocating smoking while pregnant, but it’s not like she was chain-smoking and taking a video? And then showing it to other people without even discussing it with her?? Really???

Next time, Lila plans and intervention, PJ comes to NYC, and Katie and Jess feel attacked.

May 11, 2016 — GH, & Little & Big Women in NYC

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Nina is at the office, staring at the weird picture of her that Franco sketched.

Franco is in a prison visiting room. Heather comes in wearing lots of chains.

Sonny wonders who would transfer Carrrlos in the first place.

Carrrlos tells Julian he’s at Pier 54, which might as well be Studio 54, since it’s so crowded all the time. Julian asks what he’s doing with Anna’s phone. Carrrlos says she found him, but he didn’t kill her, he just put her on ice.

Ah, the reappearance of Duke we were promised. He wakes Anna.

Carrrlos tells Julian he has no money and no ID. Julian says it’s too risky, but Carrrlos tells Julian he still has a life because of him. He just wants to be reunited with Sabrrrina and the baby, and swears Julian will never hear from him again.

Nina almost whacks Dillon in the head. He was coming in to catch up on work and didn’t realize she was sleeping there. She says the MetroCourt was booked. Kiki runs in and tells Nina she has to get home now, because Franco is losing his mind.

Franco asks Heather if she’s surprised, since the last time he saw her, she was trying to inject Nina with LSD. He tells her he’s painting again and she says she’s working on some new paintings herself. She’s moved on from sandwiches to salads. He shows Heather his latest work, a portrait of her.

Carly tells Sonny that Dante wants him to stay out of it and let the police handle it. Sonny says they see things differently. She says Carrrlos is in so much trouble, he’s going to have to take whatever deal they give him. Michael comes in and says what if they don’t find him.

Carrrlos tells Julian that he’ll have no choice but to take the plea bargain if he gets caught. Julian tells him not to get caught.

Duke, who looks amazing for a dead guy, tells Anna how beautiful she is. She says it’s been a nightmare without him and she failed him. She says she tried to bring Carrrlos to justice and Duke deserves better than that. Duke says he doesn’t want her wasting her life on that; they’re together now and that’s all that matters.

No surprise, Julian gets his gun. Alexis walks in with a cop. Good.

Kiki tells Nina it’s urgent and Dillon is surprised she left the apartment by herself. Nina says she and Franco broke up. Kiki says he’s not taking it well, and painting some scary things.

Heather says Franco’s creative forces are back. He says he’s been having a hard time with Nina because she wants a baby. Heather says a new version of Franco would be great, but he says it’s a terrible idea. He says her adoption talk was the beginning of the end. Heather says she never liked Nina anyway. Franco says he’s lost without her and the only good thing he has left is his job at the hospital as an art therapist. He says Obrecht helped him and she’s been very supportive. Heather says Obrecht is trying to stifle his creativity with a mundane job. Franco says she’s not the problem. Since he lost Nina, he’s been having dark thoughts that he doesn’t know how to stop. He doesn’t know how to get Nina back. Heather badmouths Nina some more and Franco tells her to stop and tell him how to win Nina back instead.

Carly says if Carrrlos isn’t found, Sonny needs to cut his losses and not poison his life seeking revenge. She says he should be grateful for what he has. They hear Avery cry over the monitor. Carly says Avery feels the same way and goes to tend to her. Michael tells Sonny what happened when he went to see Carrrlos. He asks if Jason’s interference was Sonny’s idea. Sonny says Carly is right and Carrrlos is trouble no one needs.

Alexis comes in with two cops. She says she told Jordan that if Julian heard from Carrrlos, he would have said something. One of the officers says they have a search warrant and they go looking. Alexis asks Julian what’s up with the gun. He says it’s to protect himself, since Carrrlos is on the loose. Alexis locks it up, but Julian hides another weapon in his waistband. He tells her he has to go to the office.

Carrrlos hears the cops coming. Anna tells Duke she’s been lost without him. She’s had grief, rage and pain about the unfairness of it all. She tells him his funeral was beautiful and people were so kind, she forgot for a while, but then fell into despair. She tells him about shooting Carrrlos and how she let the anger win. Duke tells her it’s over. He says it can’t be undone and she can’t go on reliving it. Anna says they had so much more they could have done and it’s gone. They laugh about the things they might have done. He says they both lost so much, but they’re together now. He kisses her hand.

Kiki tells Nina that Franco is spiraling and she needs to ground him. Nina says she can’t do that, and Dillon says she can’t even sleep without him. Nina says they waited so long to have sex and when they did it was great. If only they’d stayed in bed. Kiki is like, this is TMI.

Heather says she’s never been able to hang on to any of the men she’s been involved with. Franco says he’s come to accept that they’re more alike than he wants to admit. Heather says he’s a splendid son, despite who his father is, although she and Scotty were at their best in bed. Franco says it’s same with him and Nina, and Heather tells him to get her back between the sheets.

Duke talks about how if he’d begged Anna to run away with him before the Nurses Ball, they’d be in that cottage they talked about now. She tells him to take his own advice, no regrets, and tells him about Griff. The cops come, and Carrrlos hides under the pier.

The cops leave Julian’s and he tells Alexis he has to go. She asks if he’s going to see Carrrlos. He asks if she’s always going to question him now and she tells him to go, but be careful. He tells her he loves her and leaves.

Sonny calls Max, but no word on Carrrlos. Michael says Sonny seems surprisingly calm. They hear Carly with Avery over the monitor and Michael asks Sonny if the thing with Carrrlos is ever going away. Sonny says Carrrlos will get what he deserves, no matter who gives it to him. He thanks Michael for not putting himself at risk and coming home.

Duke asks who Griff’s mother is and Anna says Margaret Monroe. Duke says she was very shy, but serious. He says they broke up before he came to America, but he didn’t know she was pregnant. Anna tells him what Griff told her and about the letter.

Ha-ha! I can’t believe these goons don’t see Carrrlos’s head sticking out of the water.

The phone at Nina’s office rings. It’s Alexis, but she gets voicemail.

Julian gets to the pier. Carrrlos comes out of the water and tells him the cops just left. He says if anyone asks, he’ll say he was just taking a stroll. Carrrlos thanks him for coming and Julian says he’s there for him. If Carrrlos believes that, I have a bridge I’d like to sell him.

Alexis keeps trying to call Crimson’s office, but Nina thinks it’s Franco and won’t answer. She says if he wants to get back together, he needs to make a grand gesture.

Franco says he can’t believe that he came to Heather for advice. He says Nina won’t even talk to him, so how is he supposed to get her into bed? Heather says excuses are for ordinary people, not for extraordinary ones like them. Franco asks how that’s working for her. She says she thought she’d never see him again for one. She tells him to think big.

Carly and Michael come back downstairs to no Sonny. Carly asks if Sonny was talking about Carrrlos, and Michael says he said Sonny claimed that Carrrlos would get what’s coming to him.

Sonny thinks Julian is going to help Carrrlos, since he already killed a witness. Alexis says there was no evidence of foul play. Sonny says that doesn’t mean Julian didn’t do it. Alexis says it was strange that the witness suddenly showed up in the first place. Sonny says if Carrrlos comes back, it will ruin Julian’s new life. Alexis says he didn’t do it and Sonny says why isn’t he home then, adding because he’s with Carrrlos.

Julian gives Carrrlos some money and Carrrlos says he’ll never hear from him or see him again. He says men like them keep each other’s secrets. Julian says Carrrlos has a family to raise now. Carrrlos says just like Julian. Julian says the only thing left is good-by. I have a bad feeling about this, Beavis.

Anna tells Duke more about Griff, and how kind and generous he is, and that he’s a surgeon. Anna says when she’s with him, it’s like a part of Duke is in the room. She says Emma met him and is crazy about him. Duke says he always felt like Emma and Robin were his own family, but now he’s learned he has a son, but can’t be a part of his life.

Franco leaves and Heather goes on to the guards about what a genius he is.

Alexis opens the door to leave and runs into Sonny.

Kiki begs Nina to reach out to Franco, but she says it’s over. She says she needs some sleep and asks them to leave. Dillon says if Franco is being weird, he should follow Kiki home. Nina says relationships don’t work out, but Kiki says they’re just friends. I smell a set up.

Michael says he has to leave and clear his head. Carly tells him don’t go near the pier, the docks or Sonny’s office. He tells her Sonny will come home; he always does.

Sonny says Julian has two options, helping Carrrlos or killing him. Alexis says Julian claimed he went to Crimson, but isn’t picking up the phone.

Nina comes back into the office and Franco is there. In his birthday suit.

Duke tells Anna to tell Griff he loves him and would have sacrificed everything for him. Anna says there’s a lot of Duke in him, except for dancing. She says she loves Duke and always will. He says he feels the same way. They kiss. He tells her he promises she’ll get through this. Anna wakes up alone.

Julian says despite the trouble Carrrlos caused him, he did a lot for him and he’s grateful. Carrrlos says ditto and adios, amigo. Julian stabs him.

Tomorrow, Franco begs Nina to come back, no one can find Anna, Sonny accuses Alexis of lying, and Maxie asks if Nathan made it.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Sonja is visiting her facialist, who is discussing something about placenta and the black market. I don’t want to know. Sonja has a party coming upand the facialist didn’t get her invite. Because you always invite your facialist to your parties. Sonja talks to her assistant about the RSVPs.

Jules comes by Carole’s place. She’s invited everyone over for a psychic reading and we flash back to the coffee grounds reader who was so accurate. Really. She was. The psychic’s name is Kim Russo and Dorinda is a big fan. Kim says she reads energy and that it can’t be destroyed, so she can talk about people living or dead. Jules doesn’t want to be rude, but says in her interview that seeing a psychic isn’t very Jewish.

Kim talks to Dorinda about the many Johns in her life. Bethenny jokes that it’s an uncommon name, she’s a born cynic, and pass more cheese. Kim brings up Dorinda’s dead husband. Carole says part of her doesn’t believe this stuff, but there’s another part that wants it to be real. Kim tells Dorinda something about coins and that her husband is sending them, and this strikes a chord. Ramona is late and of course has to be noisy because everyone must focus on her and only her.

Dorinda gets weepy and says that before her husband died, he said he was going to leave change for her, and when she sees it, she should know he’s looking out for her. She says she finds them in weird places. Dead husband Richard says John is good for now, but can’t give her the “safety” she needs.

Kim says she sees a man around Bethenny and asks if there’s an anniversary of a death soon. Bethenny checks her phone and says it’s her father. Kim tells Bethenny that her father communicates in a distant way and also not to say she won’t get married again, even though Kim doesn’t see her doing it. Bethenny isn’t too impressed. Dorinda asks if she’ll get married again and Kim says yes, but not to John. Big mouth Ramona says, thank God, and Dorinda tells her to shut up and quit talking smack about John. She says she doesn’t give Ramona her opinion about the idiots Ramona brings around. Oooh, Dorinda brings up Mario leaving her for someone else. I kind of don’t blame her, because Ramona won’t shut up. Carole says it’s embarrassing.

Ramona asks if she’ll get married again and Kim says yes, but this time she’ll do things differently. Bethenny has to leave to pick up her daughter and she’s like, thanks for the cheese. Kim talks to Ramona about her father, and Ramona says he died shortly after the first time they actually connected. Kim brings up a photo and Ramona gets weepy as we see the photo in question. They take a break and Dorinda says Ramona needs to stop talking about John because it’s ruining their relationship.

Kim tells Carole she did a good thing for her friends because other emotions came out and it’s healing. Um…probably not.

Carole visits Jules, who doesn’t know what an iPod is, or the difference between one and an iPad. Carole asks for tea and Jules is confused as to how to make it. She does live on this planet, right? Jules talks about the psychic and Carole says she didn’t tell Kim anything about any of them beforehand. They talk about Bethenny’s skepticism and Carole says she was on her phone the whole time. They show a clip, and yep, she was.

Carole brings up Ramona being stupid and then what the psychic said about Jules. Jules tells Carole about her eating disorder and in her interview, Carole reflects on how Jules has an interesting and obvious relationship with food. Carole says Jules wants to express herself in a way that emancipates her and empowers other women. Jules says when she was in rehab, she wished she had someone to look up to and give her hope, and she would love to be a role model, something the psychic also talked about. Carole says at some point, Jules should think about a way to articulate it, whether it’s through writing, speeches, or whatever. Jules says she could hire someone to write it and Carole says she knows a good ghostwriter. Ha-ha!

John and Dorinda meet for dinner. Dorinda says the menu has really small writing on it and she’s right, it’s tiny. John wants some PDA and Dorinda is like, no and stop it. She brings up Ramona’s remarks at the psychic reading. John says he’s been a gentleman and Ramona has been nothing but rude. In her interview, Dorinda says she and John can be volatile and he wants to make it about him, but she wants it to be about her tonight. She says neither John nor Ramona are taking her feelings into consideration. Dorinda says the psychic said Ramona would get married again and John says he wants the best for her and starts talking about himself. She tells him he’s not even letting her get a whole sentence out.

Dorinda says if John and Ramona can’t be friends they need to be cordial. John wants to comment, but she tells him not if it’s about the past. He can’t do it and can’t seem to stop talking about it. Dorinda says she stood up for him and he should be thanking her. She tells him he’s not listening and he can grab an EZ-Pass back to Queens. I’m not sure what she means by that, since it’s a device for a car.She leaves him sitting there swilling pasta.

Sonja is throwing a birthday party for herself and also revealing her latest venture. She’s told no one about it and says she’s taken Bethenny’s advice.

Bethenny is doing some kind of promotion on the street in Manhattan. It’s raining, but tons of people still come out. Bethenny says she’s very involved with her brand and doesn’t just slap her name on something like some celebrities do. She passes out some kind of shakes from a food truck. People are taking selfies with her and we flash back to her first promotion that no one came to. She talks to her assistants afterward and recognizes their hard work. She says everyone would kill for the job only because they don’t know how hard it is.

Sonja is setting up for the party and Peter, her business partner enters. They talk about their presentation. The venue looks huge, although Sonja says it holds about 100 people.

Dorinda and Sonja kiss John on the cheeks. Eew! Dorinda says she’s about going forward and they’re going to have a good night. Ramona talks about the Countess’s birthday gift to her. Sonja is annoyed that she has to hear the regifting story again and wonders what Ramona got her for her birthday.

The Countess enters and takes Ramona aside. She tells Ramona she heard that she thinks The Countess moving in with Sonja is a bad idea. Ramona says it will be a revolving door of men and endless drinking. Jules is trying to eavesdrop. Her husband is down with that and asks if she wants him to be her beard. The Countess says Ramona is one to talk, but Ramona says although she likes a good time, she dosn’t go as far as they do. Hello? Turks and Caicos anyone? Sonja joins them and says quit talking about me.

The drinks are flowing. Dorinda tells The Countess about the necklace and Ramona says thanks a lot since she didn’t have a chance to say something herself. Ramona is pretty ticked off about this regifting business, but it turns out that Ramona doesn’t understand what the word is. What happened is this. The Countess had shown Ramona a necklace from her jewelry line that Ramona loved, but it was a sample and made out of cheaper materials that her skin reacted to. When the actual piece was manufactured, The Countess gave Ramona one for her birthday. This is not regifting and I don’t think I need to explain what that is. Ramona bitches some more and compares the necklace to the bag The Countess gave Bethenny for her birthday. Ramona is tedious and I don’t think I could take five minutes with her.

Sonja has John quiet everyone. She thanks them all for being supportive. She says they’re going to be passing trays with her new prosciutto wine, called Tipsy Girl. Not too close to Bethenny’s SkinnyGirl. Ramona doesn’t think liquor should be anything Sonja is involved with. Jules thinks that Bethenny isn’t going to appreciate the name, but Dorinda thinks she won’t care.

Jules approaches Sonja with her concerns, but Sonja is oblivious.

Next time, Sonja and The Countess join forces, Bethenny explains that a brand that rides another brand’s coattails is called a cheater brand and is a personal insult, and John kicks Ramona out. Should be good.

Little Women: NY

I’m not recapping Little Women: LA — Matt and Briana, but I do want to mention that I came to believe Matt is an opportunist. Enough said.

Jazmin’s husband, David, has to go to Florida for work, and she’s looking for a roommate because she wants to stay in NYC. She goes over to Jess’s place to ask if she can stay there, but Jess just got a roommate. She introduces Jess to Katie, who is also pregnant.

Katie says she knows Dawn and her husband (Jazmin’s brother). She says she saw them at LP conventions when they were younger, but they lost touch. She asks Jazmin how Dawn is as a sister-in-law, and Jazmin gives her a mini earful, no pun intended. Jess says she finds it hard to believe Katie and Dawn were friends, and wonders what happened to Dawn to make her so cranky.

Jason and DJ are having a rooftop brunch. DJ lives in Connecticut and comes in on the weekends. Lila and Jason haven’t spoken since Lila acted like an asshat, kicking Terra out of the housewarming party for absolutely no reason. Jason and DJ talk about their relationship and what they like about each other. It’s Jason’s first relationship, so everything is new.

Jess invites Dawn to lunch. She’s hoping to correct some of Dawn’s misconceptions. Good luck with that. If you can get the stick out of Dawn’s butt, let me know. Dawn is immediately condescending about Jess’s wrestling past and how she thinks it’s a bad influence on Jazmin. Jess says judging people by their profession isn’t fair. While Dawn agrees, she says they come from a small community and the world is judgmental. Jess says she should still be able to do what she wants to do regardless of her size. Dawn asks if she thinks it’s progressive and Jess says it’s not all that serious. Dawn brings up dwarf tossing which is not the same thing. Jess says bye, Felicia…er, Dawn.

Jason makes breakfast for Lila as a peace offering and says they should talk. He apologizes for not giving her a heads up about Terra, but says he had no idea she would get so crazy about it. He asks if anything is wrong and Lila bursts into tears. Her father has been suffering from lung disease. She’s been going back and forth to Ohio to help, and he didn’t make it. Jason feels even worse now. He tells Lila her dad is watching over her and her mom now. Lila says it puts things into perspective.

Katie meets Terra in the park. They’ve known each other for years and Katie wants to connect since Terra just had a baby and can relate. Katie says considering the measurements, her baby is going to be a little person. Terra asks where PJ (Katie’s baby daddy) is, and Katie says they’re taking a break. Katie wants to get married. Terra says it will be okay; she and Joe weren’t married when they had Penny. Katie is worried her daughter is going to grow up without a dad. Terra says Katie has a great family and support system of friends, and even if PJ doesn’t come around, Katie’s baby has Katie. Katie feels a lot better after talking with Terra.

It’s time for David to leave and it’s hard on Jazmin. She doesn’t go with him to the airport because it’s hard enough to get just yourself through the airport these days. Jazmin says she has big dreams and tons of determination. She decides to vent to Jason.

Jazmin tells Jason about approaching Dawn as a roommate and Dawn giving her a lecture. Jason says he’s not surprised, but still thinks it’s cold. He says he and Lila have a spare room and she can move in with them. He says he can turn Will and Grace into Three’s Company. They FaceTime with Lila in Ohio. Lila says it’s been busy, but she and her mom know that once everything quiets down, it’s going to feel lonely. Lila explains the situation, but before she can say anything about moving in, Lila suggests it. Problem solved.

Katie has a doctor’s appointment and Jess tags along. The doctor asks the usual questions and they go in for a sono. Loud baby. The doctor says the baby has extra digits on both hands. The baby’s father also has six fingers on each hand. Katie says she’s okay with it, but asks if it’s removable. The doctor says yes, as long as there’s no bone involved. Katie is concerned about the cost of the delivery and doesn’t know what to do.

Jason and Jazmin “pinkify” Lila’s room with flowers and balloons. Wet blanket Dawn drops by and says it might be best to give Lila her space. Since she’s lost both her parents and is the authority on everyone’s feelings. She’s also the first one to be all over Lila the second she walks through the door.

Lila is happy to be home and feels loved and supportive. She says that she’s learned family matters and she’s getting a new sister in Jazmin. Dawn says blah-blah-blah about how Jazmin should be independent, but she’s glad that Jazmin has a safe roof over her head. I focus on their really cute long-haired Chihuahua.

Jazmin makes the big move. Lila says little people and big boxes do not mix. Jazmin says Jason and Lila are more like family than Dawn will ever be. Jazmin suggests they do some belly dancing to celebrate.

Jazmin invites the gang to a Mediterranean restaurant. Jess isn’t looking forward to seeing Dawn. Dawn is surprised to see Katie and thinks she should be keeping better company than Jess. Dawn asks what brought Katie to the city. Katie explains about the trial separation, and Dawn acts like the lead balloon she is. In her interview, Dawn says it doesn’t sound like a good plan and wonders what Katie will do if PJ doesn’t come after her. She asks how Katie met Jess, and Katie says they met through wrestling and fields Dawns comments before she makes them. Jazmin says you should be supportive or keep your mouth shut. Jess says Dawn is ignorant because she doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Dawn says if they’re defensive, they probably feel embarrassed by it. No, they’re just tired of your disparaging comments.

The exploitation discussion starts and Jazmin says they’re talking about her like she’s not there. Jazmin tells Dawn not to treat her she’s a child and she’s ignorant. Dawn says she thinks pretty highly of herself, meaning Dawn thinks very highly of herself. Who the blip says things like that?

A belly dancer comes out to change the focus. She’s wearing a tray of lit candles on her head and I’m not sure what to think. Everyone puts scarves with bells on them around their waists. Lila says with short arms, the moves just don’t look the same.

Jazmin is sick of Dawn’s attitude, and asks her to go to the ladies room. Jazmin tells her that she’s sick of Dawn talking down to her. She says she’s hurt that when she came to Dawn for help, she turned her back on Jazmin, but on the other hand, Dawn is all up in Jazmin’s business. She tells Dawn to stop trying to be a family member when she’s just an in-law. Lila joins them and Dawn looks like she smelled something bad, tells them they’re going around in circles, and leaves.

Dawn tells Jason good-by. Jazmin tells Lila she’s done.

Next time, the group uses a Slip’N Slide, Jazmin catches Katie smoking, and Lila and Dawn have it out.

May 4, 2016 — GH, Little Reunion & Double the NYC

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Maxie is looking for Nathan at the hospital. The nurse at reception suggests she ask Jason where he is, since she saw Jason with some cops.

Nathan sees Griff in the hospital locker-room. He asks Griff if he’s okay and says it looks like it hurt. He adds that Griff has a specific kind of scar and he knows how Griff got it.

Sam is concerned about Alexis being suspected of murder. Jason tells Sam that Anna only accused her to get at Julian and asks if she thinks Julian did it. She asks Jason if he isn’t thinking the same thing.

Dante sees Anna at the station and says he thinks Alexis is up to her neck in it.

While looking for Nicholas, Elizabeth is startled by Franco at Windemere.

Griff says he wishes he had an epic gun battle story, but it was more like being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Nathan asks who shot him and why.

The nurse tells Maxie to check the locker-room.

Sam says Julian hasn’t changed and only told Alexis what she wanted to hear. Jason wants to get involved, but she tells him to stay away and go talk to Elizabeth about Franco.

Elizabeth wonders how Franco got in there. Franco says he learned the catacombs when his mother was in a crazy phase. He tells Elizabeth he wanted to warn her about a storm headed her way — Hurricane Jason.

Molly is doing laundry. She’s not happy about Julian, and Kristina says she thought Molly put her Julian issues to rest. Molly says she did until Alexis decided to defend Carrrlos. Kristina says Alexis has totally lost her way and sold out.

Alexis says if she gets arrested, Julian can call Diane, but she won’t be. Anna asks Dante if she can sit in on the interrogation. She wants to see how Julian reacts. Julian tells Alexis that Hale’s death was a tragic accident. Dante comes in with Anna and Julian says he’s not going anywhere. Anna says that’s because the two of them are a team, right?

Kristina tells Molly that she’d prefer Alexis wasn’t involved with Carrrlos, but Molly isn’t being fair. Molly says there’s no excuse to advocate murder; no one is that good in bed. She says Alexis isn’t in love with Julian, but with the idea that he’s in love with her. She says soon they won’t recognize Alexis and it won’t be long before she doesn’t even recognize herself.

Alexis tells Dante about her encounter with Hale. She says she was hoping to discover inconsistencies in his statement, but after a couple of minutes, he got agitated and left. She says the next time she saw him was in the parking garage.

Maxie wants an update from Sam on the Claudette investigation. Sam has Claudette’s maiden name and old address in Hell’s Kitchen. (That would be in Manhattan, not Gordon Ramsey’s restaurant.) Sam has to jet and says they’ll catch up later.

Griff says the incident wasn’t reported and that it was a misunderstanding. He says he did as much to contribute to the situation as the person who shot him and he’s sure they feel badly about it. Nathan says stuff happens and Maxie enters the locker-room.

Franco tells Elizabeth that Jason is going to level some accusations against him and he wants her to hear about it from him first. He starts with telling her about the puppy. Elizabeth says he should always check with the parents first and he says he gets that. He tells her about breaking up with Nina and how he drew the ugly picture of her. He says that Jason and Sam made a bigger deal about it than it is, and that he totally screwed up and the breakup is on him. Elizabeth says the bright side is that he’s drawing again and he’s still helping people, especially Jake. Enter Jason, who will no doubt change that.

Anna says Alexis’s account doesn’t address her opportunity. Alexis says hasn’t Anna been charged in another case, and Dante says she still works there. Julian says there’s no proof to suggest Alexis did anything. Dante says they still have to hear from forensics. His phone rings and Dante leaves. Anna asks if Alexis can account for her actions. Alexis says she was with Julian, who corroborates this. Anna asks if there’s anyone who can vouch for that who’s not involved. Julian says Alexis would never kill someone to protect Carrrlos and Anna says no, but she would to protect Julian.

Kristina tells Molly that getting involved won’t change anything, it will just upset the fragile peace she has with her parents. And besides, she has to get ready for her date.

Griff tells Maxie and Nathan to enjoy their evening and leaves. Maxie wonders why he left so quickly and Nathan says it’s probably his fault for prying about Griff’s scar. Nathan says the way Griff was talking about it, it was like he felt he deserved it.

NuNurse starts talking to Griff about the Hale thing and Alexis’s involvement. Sam comes by and tells her she’s talking about Sam’s parents and to butt out. NuNurse leaves. Sam tells Griff a little about the situation and he says his father was also a mobster.

Franco says Jason runs to Elizabeth like a playground tattletale. Ha-ha! He does! Jason says he doesn’t want Franco around his son. He says that Franco said Elizabeth wouldn’t let that happen because they’re so close. Franco says Jason is twisting his words and Elizabeth says maybe Franco should go.

Molly asks Kristina to tell her about the date. Kristina says her date’s name is Aaron, but Molly thinks she means Erin. There’s a knock at the door. Molly answers and it’s a guy looking for Kristina. Kristina says this is her date.

Franco asks Elizabeth if she’s going to let Jason dictate her life now and if it wasn’t for Jake, Jason wouldn’t give her the time of day. She asks Franco to leave. Jason tells Elizabeth that Franco is dangerous. Elizabeth says he’s made more progress with Jake than anyone else and she doesn’t see it that way.

Griff says eventually the mob cost his father his life and hopes Sam’s father fares better. Sam wonders if they’ve met before. Griff says he’s been told he bears a resemblance to his father, Duke Lavery.

Anna brings up Alexis pushing Alcazar off the balcony, and Alexis says she was of diminished capacity at the time. Anna asks if she was of diminished capacity when she killed Kristina’s boyfriend, Kiefer, by running him over. Alexis says it was deemed an accident. Anna says Hale had been clean for a year, and they’re supposed to believe he overdosed just after Alexis was harassing him? Alexis says believe what the evidence says. Anna says one death is an accident, but three is a pattern. Julian tries to interject, and Anna says if Alexis didn’t kill Hale, who did? Dante comes back and Anna asks if it was an overdose or murder.

Molly says Kristina didn’t tell her that her date was…such a cute guy. Aaron comes in and Kristina tells Molly to behave.

Maxie tells Nathan they should mind their own business and he asks if she’s feeling okay. She says normally, she would tell him to leave it alone and badger Griff herself, but they have a wedding to plan and she doesn’t want him distracted. Nathan is still concerned though.

Sam says she didn’t know Duke had kids, and Griff said he just found out. Sam tells him her father is Julian.

Dante wants to talk to Anna outside. He tells her the only prints on the needle were Hale’s and they have to let Alexis and Julian go. He tells them not to leave town. Anna says Alexis is married to the man who ordered Carrrlos to kill Duke. She asks if she’s Julian’s stooge or his accomplice. They leave. Dante tells Anna he understands, but they have no proof. Anna is worried Carrrlos is going to walk.

Griff tells Sam whatever happened with their fathers is between their fathers. Sam says she thought Duke was a good guy. Griff says he’s heard that. He goes back to work.

Jason tells Elizabeth she can’t trust Franco She says maybe Franco isn’t the most honest guy, but she doesn’t think he’s the bad guy Jason thinks he is. Jason says when it comes to their son, they should err on the side of caution.

Kristina comes back downstairs and thinks Molly scared Aaron off, but he’s just in the bathroom. When he comes back, Molly tells them not to do anything she wouldn’t do and leaves. Kristina says she hears Aaron is a knitter. He says something tells him there’s more to Kristina than meets the eye too.

Maxie wonders if Nathan has to go back to the station and he says yes. She makes him promise to leave Griff alone. She says everyone has a past, even Nathan.

Anna looks at a picture of Duke, lamenting how she thought she could get justice and make it right, but she failed. The doorbell rings. It’s Griff.

NuNurse, whose name is Amy (I wonder if this is a nod to the original Amy, Shell Kepler, who sadly passed away many years ago), tells Franco he’s looking good. He asks for a hard copy of his schedule. She has to make an alteration though. Elizabeth is discontinuing Jake’s art therapy. Amy says look at the bright side, more time for him and his girlfriend. Ouch!

Jason tells Elizabeth she made the right decision. She says Jake is not going to be happy. Jason says if he wants art therapy, they can find someone else. He says they’ll tell Jake together tomorrow. He leaves after patting her on the leg like she’s a linebacker. It’s that friend pat people do when they want to make sure you know they’re not interested in you that way.

Sam asks Dante if Alexis is at the station. He tells her that Alexis and Julian left. Sam asks about Hale and Dante says it was an overdose. She asks if he thinks Alexis did it and he says no, but he can’t say the same for Julian.

Julian asks if he can get Alexis anything and she says some answers, like to Anna’s question. She tells him don’t equivocate, evade, or lie, just tell her the truth. Did he order the witness murdered?

Tomorrow, Kristina has something to tell Sonny, Alexis questions Julian, and Finn asks Carly why she needs to see him.

Little Women: LA — The Reunion, Part Two

There’s a mini free-for-all that Kevin Frazier is trying to calm. They go to break. Matt and Briana decide they’re not staying if his texts are going to be read. Kevin says Matt should stay and take his medicine. One of the producers says they won’t include the more disgusting ones. Why? Inquiring minds want to know. Kevin says most are so vulgar, they can’t even show them. Alrighty then.

They read some phony nonsense stuff where he’s lying to women about his relationship. Kevin asks why things escalated and got as graphic as they did. This is such a stupid question, I can’t even. It’s basically a classic case of another guy going wild with other women using technology because he can.

Briana says she doesn’t defend or excuse anything, and it’s made her question her worth. Jasmine says a baby being raised by “that man” is not good. Terra wonders how many times she’s going to forgive him. Kevin asks if Matt is afraid he’ll be cut out of his son’s life. Matt says of course. He says either he’ll stop his behavior or Terra will turn out to be right.

Oh boy! Next week, there’s a special episode on Matt and Briana’s relationship because we haven’t gotten enough. We get a sneak peek. It’s all just sad, especially since she’s pregnant.

Jasmine is pissed because she gave Matt a chance and she wants the best for Briana. She says she is proud of Briana for defending herself. Tonya says they’re all upset and Briana says this is her life they’re talking about and she’s in pain. She says they doubt her before she has a chance to even say anything. Terra talks about them trying to warn her. No point in rubbing it in. Briana says it seems like they’re saying “I told you so.” Tonya says that’s not it; they’re just tired of hearing the lies.

Kevin asks who Briana thinks is there for her. She says Christy has been there, but the others seems to just give lip service to it. Jasmine is hurt and I don’t blame her. Briana admits Jasmine has also had her back. Kevin is like, quit the attack mode and think of something helpful.

Elena thinks they sholdn’t pressure Briana to break up with Matt and that if she has love for him in her heart, she has the right to work on it. Kevin asks Briana if she believes Matt is capable of faithfulness. She says she wants to, but he hasn’t proven that when times get tough.

Kevin asks Matt if he has anything to say before he goes. He thanks Elena, Jasmine and Christy for being supportive and says he has nothing for the other two. Exit Matt.

We flash back to Terra and Christy’s relationship and how it had improved until the ice tea incident. (Guns N’ Roses‘ sequel to The Spaghetti Incident.) Kevin goes over what happened and it sure sounds like Christy started it. Terra says it took a lot for her to become friends with Christy again and it hurt her to find out Christy was lying. She says the only thing she shouldn’t have done was throw the drink. Christy says it upset he to hear that Terra and Tonya said she tried to force them to come to Mexico. Three angles of unedited video happens. I swear it looks like their almost laughing during this altercation though. It’s all fun and games until someone goes home in a cone.

Christy and Terra argue about what happened and who started it, even though we saw more aspects of this than a Jets game. Elena interjects that Christy has changed her story. Kevin asks if she really had a concussion. She says yes, and Terra asks if anyone has seen the test result. Christy says she gave it to production. So let’s see it. Oh, okay, Kevin glosses over that one.

Terra says by filing the police report, Christy will never be her friend again. She says Christy totally messed with her home life and her work life. I kind of don’t blame her on this one. Yeah, no one should be throwing anything at anyone else, but seriously, it didn’t look like anything happened except Christy’s hat getting grazed, we still didn’t see any proof, and Christy should have settled it between them — not in court or in the court of public opinion, otherwise known as TMZ and Instagram.

Special guest, Dawn, arrives. Kevin says she was instrumental in Christy filing charges. Dawn is the cranky paralegal from Little Women: NY. Dawn says since Christy went to the hospital, it was definitely assault. Christy said Dawn told her she had to do something because she had a concussion. I guess settling it between themselves was out of the question. Kevin asks why she didn’t bring the hat, which she insists is mesh, and Christy says her lawyer told her not to. Kevin asks if that means there will be a pending case.

Terra says Christy threw the first punch, I mean, glass. Everyone starts talking at once and Kevin tells everyone to shut up. He says they can play the video again. Oh man, it’s so obvious that the cup only skimmed the top of the hat; it didn’t even move the hat. Kevin says Christy clearly threw the first cup.

Kevin asks if Dawn’s opinion is changed after seeing the video. Kevin calls it an alleged concussion and Christy gets annoyed. She tells him to call the hospital and mumbles about how she should have brought the report. Well, yeah. Kevin tries to get them to shut up.

Dawn says it’s not the first time Terra has exhibited this behavior. She says that when Terra was in New York, she chucked a beer bottle at her. I’ve wanted to chuck a beer bottle at Dawn since we first met her.

We get a scene from the upcoming Little Women: NY from when Terra visits. Terra has a great haircut and Lila gets in her face, insults her and tells her to get out of her apartment. We’ve been seeing a smidgen of this on the commercials. Kevin asks why she threw a bottle. Terra says Jason had invited her over and immediately Lila told her to leave since she’s unstable, but she wasn’t assaulting anyone, and she just threw it at the door.

Kevin asks who called TMZ about the ice tea incident. Christy says they showed up at the hospital. Kevin asks Dawn if she called and she says no. He asks Terra the same question, which is really stupid, since it made her look bad, which is exactly what she says. She says every time there was something in the press, Christy’s was the name in the headline. Dawn says physical violence is always unacceptable. Like we haven’t seen some nasty stuff from her. Terra says the charges have been deemed irrelevant by the police and the DA dropped the charges. Kevin tries to go to break, but no one will stop talking.

He asks for any final words from Dawn. She says everyone is amazing, but there’s no reason for physical violence between little people. So, is it okay for average sized people?

The men join the group, but Joe had to leave and tend to Penny. Kevin says he and Todd stood by their wives during the fray. Terra says it had a big impact on their family and there’s still no proof. Kevin asks Todd if he thinks filing a police report was necessary. Todd is like, duh…I dunno, but concurs that Christy had a concussion. Terra says Christy lied just the way she always does. Christy asks why she cares and Terra says because Christy messed with her life.

Terra makes Christy produce her EpiPen to prove she has allergies. <snort> Todd says he has no issues with Joe and that pisses Christy off. Kevin asks if there’s any coming back, but it looks highly doubtful. Kevin says this will have to be settled next season.

Kevin gets nosy about Jasmine having another child, since everyone else is pregnant. Preston says he’s excited about the twins. Kevin says several of them received calls from Matt and asks what that was about. Chris says Matt just talked about his past and how it affected what he’s done. Preston says his main concern has always been Briana and Matt has some deep issues. Todd says hopefully he gets help. Kevin asks if they should stay together.

Chris says Matt needs to get help before they can move on. Todd says it’s a grey area and he can’t honestly answer the question. Preston doesn’t want to commit to an answer either, but he says Briana is a grown woman and it’s up to her. In other words, there’s no way these guys are giving an opinion on this, and that’s a smart move. Matt says he agrees it’s on him. He either gets help and fixes it, and they stay together or don’t. Very astute.

We see another clip from the Matt and Briana special. We see a lot of Matt whining and pointing fingers. Kevin asks why do the special? Terra says the viewers care about Briana and will want to see what happens. Briana says from day one, their relationship was in the spotlight, so why end with more questions than answers. She says they still need to figure out where they are and where they’re going and get ready for the baby. Matt hasn’t been living at home, and they’re spending tonight in a hotel. After that, who knows?

Kevin tells us that Little Women: LA will be returning for another season. But I guessed that when he used the words “next season.”

Little Women: NY

Lila is having a party. She’s now rooming with Jason, who comes in with the decorations. He says moving out of his parents house is exciting but scary, and how better to celebrate that a pajama jam. They try putting up some crepe paper. “Try” being the operative word.

Lila asks if she’s going to meet Jason’s special someone tonight. He says yes, he thinks it’s time. He asks Lila if she’s going to be okay with having alcohol for the other guests, since she’s a recovering alcoholic, and already Lila starts whining. Jasmine is bringing another little person along who is new to the city.

Jazmin meets Jess (new girl) in Central Park for a workout. Jess is aka Jersey Jess and traveled with Hulk Hogan’s wrestling show. She’s in the city going on auditions. Jazmin tells Jess about her SIL Dawn and we flash back to how unsupportive Dawn has been of her. Jazmin says she can be herself around Jess and hopes everyone is accepting. Ha!

Dawn has just broken up with her boyfriend and is putting her energy into work. She’s first to arrive. Jason tells Dawn that he’s invited someone to the party and Lila tells her about Jazmin’s new friend. Already Dawn acts like Jazmin can’t think for herself and wants to size the new friend up.

When Jess comes in, Dawn already knows who she is from social media. She says Jess is well known in the little people world and not for her charity work. In her interview, she’s very insulting to both Jess and Jazmin. Jess is has a kind of dwarfism where she’s small, but proportionate, and feels she doesn’t fit in with either crowd, average or little.

Oh no. Dawn feels it’s her “responsibility” to tell Jazmin about her concerns. Jazmin said she knew Dawn would feel that way, but hoped she’d have some manners. They’re downstairs and Lila hears them shouting. Dawn’s brother is defending Jazmin and this offends Dawn. David says Dawn shouldn’t judge people by the internet and she’s being judgy. Dawn says Jazmin should watch the company she keeps. David says they should join the party and Dawn says the discussion isn’t over.

Jess says they found out how thin the walls are. Jason introduces his new boyfriend, DJ. Jason talks about how they met online. DJ is pretty cute. Previously, it hasn’t been mentioned that Jason is gay, but it’s also been very obvious. At least to me. Probably to everyone.

Terra shows up. Lila wonders if it’s some sick joke. Lila had once had a brief fling with Joe when he and Terra had broken up. Later, when Terra and Joe were back together, Lila kept trying to hit on Joe and it didn’t go over well with Terra, causing a fight a couple of LA seasons ago. Jason is friends with Terra and says it means a lot that she made it. Lila says Terra dragged her name through the mud and she is not happy. We flash back to the LA altercation.

Lila says Terra has some major nerve and her home is her sacred place. Terra asks Jason for a tour and Lila runs and locks her room. It’s a duplex apartment, which is awesome. I can’t imagine what the rent must be. While they’re out of the room, Lila asks the others wtf does Jason think he’s doing? She says she doesn’t want friction between them, but it’s a huge slap in the face. She gets all weird about where Terra’s pocketbook and shoes are and moves them.

Terra asks Jason if she was supposed to put her purse in the toilet. Jason says he didn’t realize it was all still an issue. They go back downstairs and Terra apologizes for being a surprise. Dawn chastises Jason for not giving a heads up and says he should talk to Lila. Terra says sorry, but Jason invited her.

Lila reads some kind of blessing thing they got as a housewarming gift and tells Terra to get out. Terra asks where her shoes are and Lila throws them out the door. Jess wonders how Jazmin is friends with Lila and Dawn. Lila threatens to call the cops about an intruder. This girl is definitely unhinged. Terra says she came over for Jason and Lila is clearly having emotional issues. I say Lila is clearly a whackjob. When Dawn tries to stick her nose into it, Terra lets fly about Lila trying to sext Joe after they were engaged. Lila gets an inch from Terra’s face and screams at her to get out, hurling a bunch of insults at her. Terra throws a beer bottle and it sticks in the door. Bet she couldn’t do that again if she tried.

Jason can’t believe all this drama is happening in front of his new boyfriend and thinks he should reevaluate his friendships. He walks Terra out and she tells him that it’s his place too, and not to let Lila call all the shots. Speaking of shots, Lila says she’d kill for a cocktail.

Jess is talking to her friend, Kim, on the phone and tells her about the party. She says her best friend, Katie, is coming for a visit. She’s pregnant and just broke up with her baby daddy. She and Jess know each other from the wrestling circuit. The baby’s father is average sized and the baby is going to be a little person. Jess tells Katie about how she felt judged at the party.

Lila meets Dawn in the park for yoga. They discuss Lila loosing her sh*t at the party. Lila says that Terra wouldn’t get out of her area. To her credit, Dawn says reminds her that she has a roommate. Lila says she’d rather live in a broom closet. Dawn goes through various yoga positions and Lila isn’t sure if she’s serious or just making them up as she goes along.

Lila is angry at herself for how she reacted, but Dawn says at least she didn’t have a drink. Lila says Dawn helps her put things in perspective and she wants to keep her friendship with Jason.

Jason meets Jazmin for coffee. He says the party was crazy and didn’t sit with him well. He says no one understood his point of view. He says if Lila invited an enemy of his, he’d at least be cordial. Jazmin says he should have told her first. He says he didn’t have anyone on his side, even her. He feels like he was piggyback attacked. He says he’s hurt that people thought he was being malicious and no one stood up for him.

Jason says everyone forgot his character and now he questions his friendships. He says he’ll apologize to Lila, but he’s not letting her run the show either. He thanks Jazmin for letting him vent.

Jess shows Katie around the city. Katie has no idea what she’s doing with her life. She’s been seeing her boyfriend, PJ, off and on for years. She wants him to put a ring on it or move along. She says right now she’s focusing on her and the baby, and if he joins them, he joins them.

David’s job wants him to go to Orlando — this week. He doesn’t have specifics on how long and he wants Jazmin to come with him. Jazmin doesn’t think it’s fair to make her leave her career. David says it will be really expensive to keep two places, so maybe she could get a roommate. He suggests Dawn because she’s the only other person in New York and the internet doesn’t exist. Jazmin isn’t thrilled with that idea, but says she’ll do anything to stay in the city.

Jazmin and Dawn sit down together. Jazmin tells Dawn about David’s job and how she thinks it’s bad timing for her to leave NYC. She suggests they room together. Dawn says she was raised not to rely on family and they’re still working on their relationship. She says Jazmin should get her own place and learn what it’s like to be independent. It’s a no and Jazmin says she’s asking for help. Dawn won’t let her talk and Jazmin says she won’t listen. She asks why Dawn is always shutting the door on her. Dawn says she needs to spread her wings and Jazmin says she does, but Dawn is critical of her.

Dawn says she’s being honest that it won’t work and she needs to respect that. Jazmin says Dawn is literally a knucklehead. Jazmin tells her she’s going to end up alone with cats. Ha-ha!

This season, Jason and Lila discuss the Terra thing, Katie’s baby has extra fingers, Lila’s father dies, Dawn lectures Jess (and probably everyone else), there’s some dancing and a Slip’N Slide, and the baby comes.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Yay! Back to back NYC tonight!

Bethenny is packing a bag for her daughter, Brit. She says Brit is like a mini-me, although she’s still independent. Bethenny gives her selections to choose from, rather than just telling her what to do, which is an excellent parenting move.

Dorinda meets Carole for dinner. Carole has a new phone. She lost her old one. Without a password. She says she had a sexy screen saver of Adam on it, and Dorinda says someone got lucky. They talk about Jules’s seven year project house. Carole says the vibe was off for her and Dorinda says it was tense and awkward. Carole says only the two of them ate. Dorinda thinks they’re using John as a panacea for all the group problems and I don’t even know where that came from. In her interview, Dorinda thinks she should keep John away from the other girls.

Jules shows up and Carole apologizes for ruining the energy at the brunch. She says she and Bethenny felt awkward. Jules says she’s having a hard time having a favoable impression of Bethenny. She doesn’t know if Bethenny is rude, condescending or what. She’s really annoyed about the criticism of her home. The girls say it’s just her personality, but Jules says that’s not an excuse for being rude. In her interview, Carole says Jules doesn’t know Bethenny  and she was just being “overly honest.” Here we go again with that honesty thing.

In her interview, Jules says there’s a difference between new money Bethenny and old money her and Michael. Jules says maybe she’s misunderstanding Bethenny, but she hasn’t had a good impression. Dorinda says Bethenny is an acquired taste, but she thinks if Jules is willing to peel back the layers, there’s a friendship there. Carole says Jules seems sweet, but under the surface, there’s crazy.

Sonja is going over her schedule with her latest intern. Then the great leveler happens — her dog poops on the carpet. Ramona comes by for a visit. She has her notarized divorce papers. She reads them out loud. They get hung up on the word “solemnized.”

Ramona says Sonja wasn’t invited to Bethenny’s party because she gets embarrassingly drunk and Bethenny doesn’t want to be around her. Sonja thinks Bethenny would tell her something like that herself and I do too. Ramona says she sees that Sonja drinks too much and that’s why she’s stepped away somewhat. She says she’s seen people hold Sonja up and Sonja says she’s seen the same with Ramona. Ramona says she’s in denial and Sonja thanks her for her opinion. Sonja says she does what she wants and reels it in when she has to. She adds she’s coming off a tough time.

They talk about the Countess, and Sonja tells Ramona she’s coming to stay for a while. Ramona does not think that’s a good idea and that she’ll be a horrible influence. She thinks Sonja will try to keep up with the Countess who apparently has a wooden leg.

Adam is off doing a documentary and Carole feels a little envious. She FaceTimes with him. It’s the longest they’ve been apart and Carole likes the feeling of missing each other.

Jules meets Bethenny for lunch. Bethenny knows she was harsh at the brunch and wants to connect with Jules. Jules is nervous and says the brunch was a little tense. She can’t seem to get her point across and in her interview, Bethenny says Jules needs a map to find the words. Jules says Bethenny was kind of abrupt. Bethenny says she didn’t know it was only going to be six people and when John opened the door it wasn’t a good start. Jules says she felt hurt that Bethenny criticized her home. Bethenny says she’s sorry if she made Jules uncomfortable and it was nothing personal. Jules says it’s hard for her to talk feelings.

Jules talks about having an eating disorder when she was younger. She says you’re never cured, but you learn to deal with it. In her interview, she says she was a swimmer and when she quit swimming, it got bad. Bethenny thanks her for being honest, and says it brings up her own issues and how she had to walk on eggshells around her mother as a child.

Jules says she and Mike have a guy in mind for her and he’s a Greek shipping heir. Bethenny says she loves feta cheese. I’m not sure if she’s talking about cheese or it’s a euphemism for something. Just kidding.

Carole and Bethenny go to Ramona’s place for lunch. Carole asks Bethenny how the lunch with Jules went. Bethenny says she encouraged Jules to be honest and she was open and vulnerable. Bethenny doesn’t repeat what Jules told her and in her interview says that’s not her story to tell. Good for her. Ramona asks Carole if she’ll be okay with the Countess is invited to her birthday party, although she’s putting them at separate tables. It’s going to be quite a crowd.

Bethenny tells about getting together with Kyle Richards and Kyle having a dinner party. The Countess harassed Bethenny relentlessly for an invite even though it wasn’t her party to invite anyone to. Bethenny wonders if she’s still friends with Dorinda and Carole says Dorinda is okay with her.

Dorinda and Jules meet at the salon for a mani/pedi. Jules says she learned you have to give someone a chance to explain themselves and says she feels better about her relationship with Bethenny. Dorinda talks to Jules about the bra party and how she felt overwhelmed by Ramona and that she doesn’t feel the same anymore. She says it’s devastating thinking you’re safe with someone and then finding out you’re not. Amen, sista. Been there, felt that.

It’s time for Ramona’s birthday party. Bethenny says the crowd looks like they haven’t moved from last year. Ramona says these are all the girls who were supportive during her horrendous divorce. Bethenny and Ramona talk about Sonja, and Bethenny says the reason she didn’t invite Sonja to her party was because they haven’t hung out in months. So this means Ramona made that up about Bethenny saying it was about her drinking. Nice.

The cake is pretty amazing, with a decorative icing (I think) purse on top of it. Jules says she’s heard negative things about Sonja, but feels a connection right away. The Countess pointedly ignores Carole. Carole says she’d rather the glide-by than the fake double air kiss.

The Countess had something made for Bethenny for her birthday. It’s some kind of bag with her name on it. Ramona is a little miffed because she got a necklace from the Countess’s collection and knows it was a regift. The Countess tells Bethenny she’s like family, but Bethenny says she was aggressive about Kyle’s party. The Countess is offended and starts getting a little loud. Bethenny says friends aren’t pushy like that and the Countess says friends don’t do what she’s doing now. Bethenny says she doesn’t think the Countess is honest and the Countess says if she doesn’t think so, she’s sorry. They hug and the Countess says she’s a little fragile right now. Bethenny says she just wants her to be honest. In her interview, Bethenny says she thinks the Countess is feeling lonely and it’s catching up with her.

Dorinda says she doesn’t want to talk about anything in the past and it’s onward and upward. She discusses John with the Countess, Sonja and Dorinda, and says the critics must be jealous. Ramona immediately relays that to Carole and Bethenny. Dorinda gives a toast. She says it’s the day after the fourth anniversary of her husband’s death and talks about how Ramona made her get up and out at a time when she wanted to hide. She says that girlfriends are the most important of all relationships.

Next time, the ladies see a psychic (we know how that always goes), Jules tells Carole about her eating disorder, Dorinda and John have a fight, and Sonja is getting into the liquor business, since she’s already into the liquor.

April 27, 2016 — GH, Little Reunion, Baby Number Two & NYC Wives

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Hayden meets Curtis at The Floating Rib. She snaps her fingers for the waitstaff and Curtis suggests she not be rude, lest their be retaliation like spitting in her food.

Epiphany has to do inventory and is not too pleased. She tells Finn there’s a problem with the pill count in the dispensory. She’s being audited because someone else didn’t do their job.

Tracy is ready to leave the hospital in the morning. She tells Finn she’s not done with him yet. He asks if that’s a backgammon invitation, but she says it’s more serious than that.

Dillon and Kiki are in the garage. He asks how Kiki is holding up and she says so far, so good.

Kristina goes to visit Morgan and bumps into a young guy.

Julian tells someone (probably Hammer, since he’s the only guy who works for the organization) on the phone to find out who the eyewitness is and make sure he doesn’t talk.

Once again, Jason and Sam get caught in the rain. They run into a stable. Someone is watching them from outside.

Hayden tells Curtis things haven’t been going well. He asks what about her end game? She tells him Nicholas tricked her by selling the ELQ shares to Jason. She says it’s over, both her marriage and taking over ELQ. She says she thought about making restitution to her father’s clients, but she can’t do that with only $5 million. She checked the prenup and there’s no way out of Nicholas giving it to her. Curtis says clearly they’re from different circles, since where he comes from losers don’t get a consolation prize like that. He advises her to take the money and run.

Tracy tells Finn that there’s going to be an emergency hospital board meeting. She says Obrecht isn’t acting in the best interest of the hospital. She’s staging a coup, and when the dust settles, Finn will be on staff.

Jason gives Sam his coat and they kiss.

Alexis brings Leo downstairs. He wasn’t sleeping and caught her looking at him. Julian says he’s having a problem at the office. Alexis asks who it is he wants to make sure doesn’t talk?

Dillon doesn’t want to wait for the auto service, so he decides to change the tire himself. Kiki asks if he wants to make movies, why did he leave LA? Dillon says his brother was worried about his mom, his dad moved back to town, and life happened. He says he was glad to be there when his mom got sick though. He talks about Maxie’s sister, Georgie, and how she was murdered and he gets why Kiki wants to hid from the world. He says things were better once he decided to go back out into the world.

New guy says he hasn’t met Morgan yet. Kristina tells him to look at the place like a clinic, not a loony bin, but he says he’s there to visit someone. While he’s talking to her, Morgan comes out and new guy leaves.

Kristina gives Morgan a playlist of upbeat music. Morgan tells her new guy was totally hitting on her.

Curtis gives Hayden sports analogies to tell her to focus on what she has, not what she lost. She says if she got the ELQ money, she could have paid some people back. Curtis says that was her father’s problem, and she shouldn’t feel obligated to clean up the mess. She says she has to meet someone who will prbably have more bad news.

Julian tells Alexis he was calling in a favor because his family’s safety is his first priority. He says he hired a legit security firm, but Alexis says she doesn’t want or need it. He says it’s a high profile case with a lot at stake for a lot of people. Alexis asks if he’s done anything to compromise himself or the case, but Julian says no. He takes Leo back to bed.

It’s still pouring. Jason saw a car pull up, but although he tried to get their attention, they left. Sam is stressing about Franco, but Jason tells her not to worry. Sam says she’s afraid for Jason and doesn’t want anything to take him away from her or Danny. Jason suggests they find a way to keep warm.

Kristina asks Morgan if he heard about her and Parker. Morgan asks who is he? Kristina explains what happened and how she got suspended, and by the way, Parker is a woman. Morgan is like, really? you got suspended? Kristina says it’s funny he’s more focused on that than her trying to have sex with a woman. Morgan says that’s how it goes in college and at least he’s not the only screw up now.

Hayden comes to Tracy’s hospital room. Tracy introduces her to Finn. Finn tells Tracy good luck and Tracy says she’ll see him soon. Hayden asks if Tracy called her in to gloat. Tracy tells her she’s fired.

Epiphany says she has to ask Finn something and she’s dreading it.

Alexis looks at the preliminary report from the eyewitness. Julian says he guesses he’s not allowed to look at it and she tells him he guessed right and puts it in her bag. She says it’s not great for the marriage to keep secrets, but it’s necessary. Julian says as long as his old life seeps into their new one, it has to be done. She says her head gets it, but her heart doesn’t like it. Julian says the eyewitness feels like a plant, like something Sonny would do. Alexis says the witness doesn’t seem that credible.

Kiki talks about depression and like it’s losing all hope even when it’s given back to you. Dillon asks if that’s how she feels and she says she shouldn’t because she survived and everything is fine now. Dillon says just because the body is healed doesn’t mean the spirit is healed on the same timetable. Kiki says Morgan seems to be getting better an she wishes she would to.

Kristina says Sonny doesn’t know about Parker being a woman. Morgan thinks he’d be accepting, but Kristina says she doesn’t want to test that right now. Morgan thanks her for acting normal and not making him feel like the biggest screw up in the world. She says it takes one to know one.

Finn asks if there have been more complaints about Roxie. Epiphany says no, but asks him if he can sing. He asks if she’s asking him out to karaoke and she says she has a boyfriend. She tells him about the Nurses Ball and says she’ll be expecting him to participate. he says he has no talents and she says he’ll fit right in.

Hayden tells Tracy she knows she lost everything, mostly because of her own bad decisions. Tracy says Hayden was successful before her father ruined things. Tracy says she hates wasted potential. Hayden says don’t worry, she won’t ask for a reference. Tracy says she sometimes almost feels sorry for Hayden, then she remembers what a self-serving bitch she is. Hayden says she doesn’t need Tracy’s sympathy and walks out the door, nearly running into Finn. He asks if she really feels badly about the lives that were ruined by her and her father.

Jason and Sam cuddle, and Jason talks about how happy she’s made him. He says he’s concerned though about getting into it with Nicholas and Franco, and doesn’t want any payback. Sam says she feels safest when she’s with him.

Hayden asks if Finn invested money with her father and she’s sorry. He says someone he cared about had been affected. She says she had no idea what her father was doing until it was too late and if she could make restitution, she would. Finn says yeah, right.

Alexis says she said too much already, so just forget it. Julian says he shouldn’t have pressed, but it seems fishy that someone should step forward right now. Alexis hears Leo on the monitor. She tells Julian she loves their life together and goes to check on the baby. No surprise, Julian heads straight for her bag and looks at the paper.

Dillon gets the tire changed and complements Kiki on being out in the world without a meltdown. He asks if she wants to go for ice cream and she says yes.

Kristina runs into new guy again on her way out. He asks if he can call her some time. Introducing himself would be a great start.

Julian calls Hammer. He tells him he has the witness’s name and address, and to shut him up no matter what it takes.

Tracy tells Finn she couldn’t help but overhear his conversation with Hayden. She asks who the person was who was hurt by Hayden’s father.

Hayden tells Curtis that Tracy wanted to see her to fire her in person, and then one of the doctors jumped her about her father. Curtis says she could leave town, but he’d miss her. She says hasn’t he heard she’s a con woman with a heart of stone? He says he knows her better than that. She says every time she turns around something worse happens. He says that’s the good news; it can’t get any worse since she’s hit rock bottom.

Curtis goes to get drinks and two FBI guys approach the table and say Hayden has to come with them.

Sam is concerned Franco will push Jason until he reacts. Jason says she should be more worried about him doing something dangerous. Someone is peeping through the window.

Tomorrow, Sonny tells Carly he doesn’t want her anywhere near the situation, Tracy is released from the hospital, and Franco comes home to Nina.

Little Women: LA — The Reunion, Part One

Kevin Frazier is hosting. Was Vivica A. Fox busy? Or did she get some real work?

First, the flash backs. Weddings, tea throwing, whining, social media, more whining.

Kevin asks what it’s like to relive the moments. How does he think? It brings up all the past crap again. He asks about Briana’s wedding and if she’s glad Christy came without being invited. She says it was bittersweet. They’re both going through a lot, but communication is open.

Moving on to the babies. Kevin thinks they should have a mid-wife on set with all the pregnancies. (BTW, all of the ladies look fabulous. They’ve really come into their own styles.) Elena is miffed that she can’t wear heels, but says it’s all worth it. Briana says she’s feeling big and a lot is going on in her personal life. Kevin says Matt left two children in Seattle and wonders if Briana’s concerned he’ll leave her, but she says it’s more likely she’ll leave him. Terra is now pregnant with baby number two. Christy says she’s happy for Terra and Terra says she’s just as fake as always. Terra says even being pregnant, she’s thinner than Christy on her best day. Whoa.

Kevin asks Christy if she has adoption news and she starts crying. I assume the news isn’t good. Poor Todd gets brought into the fray. We flash back to all the Christy and Todd baby stuff and Christy harping on him to lose weight. Todd says that they’re baby got scooped out from under them by another family.

Kevin asks Terra for her input, but she says it’s none of her business, especially since they’ve affected her home life, which is none of their business. Kevin asks Todd about the weight issue and if gastric bypass is still on the table. He says he’s lost 30 pounds on his own, so the jury is still out. Exit Todd. That was fast.

On to the “challenges” of friendship, and a few volatile scenes between Terra and Tonya. Kevin asks Tonya if she was surprised at all the screaming and yelling on Terra’s part. Tonya says she dropped the ball as far as Penny’s surgery went, but she did call and text.

Commercial break with important information. Little Women: NYC is back on Wednesday, May 4.

Elena says Terra sometimes thinks she’s a super woman who can do everything. She says sometimes Terra says she doesn’t want help when she really does. Terra gets emotional and expects everyone to be a mind reader. Kevin asks if things are good or still strained between the three of them and Terra says a bunch of stuff that doesn’t really answer that question.

Kevin says one relationship that’s been consistently cold, but has started thawing, is Jasmine and Elena. We flash back to Elena being pretty stubborn about Jasmine’s inclusion into the group. Kevin asks Jasmine if she thinks jealousy was involved and she says only on Elena’s part. Elena balks at that and Kevin asks how it’s going now. They both say things are cool. I have to add that Jasmine’s magenta hair extensions or highlights look fantastic.

Kevin asks Briana if she has any friends left in the group and we flash back to all that mess, ending with the Matt sexting business. Briana says she and Terra will never be best friends, but things are copacetic now. Terra asks if she can understand how they felt shafted by Christy, who told them she wasn’t supportive of the marriage, but told Briana a different story.

Kevin asks why the ladies decided to confront Briana about the sexting. Jasmine is pretty pissed because she’d been supportive of Matt and then he proved to be a jerk. They’re all annoyed about Matt acting like a sex-crazed idiot when Briana is pregnant and Tonya says clearly he doesn’t love Briana. I’m with Jasmine on this, since I was also supportive of Matt throughout the season and he turned out to be such a huge disappointment.

Tonya says they saw the evidence from day one, but Briana refused to listen. Kevin asks Briana if Matt can do no wrong in her eyes. Briana says he’s been gone from the house for a week now and Terra says he’s just visiting his kids. Kevin asks for clarification and Briana says they’re on a break. No one is really letting her talk though. Kevin says hold on, she’s in a tough position. He doesn’t condone the behavior, but says Briana is pregnant, so cut her some slack. He asks if she still loves Matt and she says she has to figure it out. Elena says there’s a lot on Briana’s shoulders and the world isn’t black and white. She says that some people can forgive more than others and this is something Briana has to figure out for herself. Kevin says it’s a hard decision, what Matt’s done is very wrong, but not everything is cut and dried. He asks if she ever regrets getting pregnant, but Briana says she can’t say that.

Enter Matt. Better hide all throwable objects. And the chairs. Jasmine refuses to sit near him and moves to the other side. She asks him if he even knows how much pain he’s causing Briana and on top of it, he made her look like an idiot for defending him. She asks him why, and he says there’s no excuse, so he’s not even going to try. He says he’s sorry and he knows that seems meaningless coming from him, but it’s the best he can say. We flash back to all the awful Matt moments this season. And also the wedding.

Kevin asks Matt why. Matt starts to talk about his past and the women start laughing and putting in their two cents. Matt says he’s desperate for attention, especially sexual, and he’s trying to figure things out. Kevin asks how many women he’s been involved with and he says he’s not sure and barely remembers most of the conversations with them. Tonya talks about him not having a job and idle hands being the devil’s workshop.

Christy says she’s an addict and it’s something you have to work on daily. Tonya says he’ll always disrespect Briana and he doesn’t love her. Kevin asks why Matt stayed with Briana and got her pregnant when he was involved with these other women? Kevin takes Matt to task and tells him he should give everyone answers, since he had no problem giving out d*ck pics. Now, I’m not defending Matt in any way, but it would be nice if they’d let him answer. He’s barely been able to get a word in with the ladies barraging him.

Kevin says this should be the happiest time in Briana’s life and she has to deal with some hard stuff. Matt says he was sexually abused as a child. He says he never told anyone, so he can’t blame his family for not helping him. He says he goes for immediate gratification. Terra says he’s just trying to validate his actions. Tonya says she was molested and she didn’t react like that because there couldn’t possibly be a different reaction than hers. Kevin asks what Elena thinks. She says Matt needs to grow up and stop his behavior if he’s serious about Briana.

Kevin asks if Briana thinks Matt has stopped his behavior, but no one let’s her talk. She says she’s not sure because he’s said it was over before. His past aggressiveness is brought up. Kevin reads a tabloid article about Matt’s domestic violence and asks if the statement is true. Matt says no. Kevin says some of the ladies asked to be separated from him and he says he’s never touched a woman. He brings up Terra throwing the glass. Touche.

Everyone starts talking at once. There is some animosity between Terra and Christy. Kevin asks if when Matt heard his own texts, if he was embarrassed. Briana says she told him to leave for a week and he did. Haven’t we been here before? Along with the word “break?” Kevin says they’re going to read some of the texts when they come back from break. During the break, Briana and Matt say they’re not staying. Kevin says he can understand Briana not wanting to be there, but Matt should take his medicine.

This reunion is tough to watch because no one has any control and you can’t hear what anyone is saying.

Next week, The Reunion, part two — Briana is hurt, the men join the group, and the ice tea incident is discussed.

Terra’s Little Family

Tonya discourages Terra from having another baby. Elena agrees. Terra tells them both to shut up because she’s pregnant. She leaves the table.

Terra tells us she was late, but it wasn’t unusual. Then she took two pregnancy tests and it was confirmed.

Tonya feels awful about what she said. Terra comes back all sniffly. She says she didn’t want to say anything because she hasn’t told Joe yet. She says she’s crying because this is the second time she told friends before Joe. She says she’s scared because she knows it’s a lot to take on, but in her heart, she knows she can do it. She really is happy though. Tonya and Elena say they’re there for her.

It’s time for Terra to tell Joe she’s pregnant. She says it took a lot of convincing to just get him to try again, so she isn’t sure how he’s going to take the news of it happening so fast. She has a “Big Sis” onsie for Penny and that’s how she’s going to make the announcement.

Joe is having coffee and Terra brings Penny in. She says she has something she needs to tell him. Then she asks if he made his doctor’s appointment yet. He’s like, huh? She says she put Penny in a special outfit. She turns Penny around and says she’s pregnant.

Joe starts laughing and says it wasn’t supposed to happen yet. He says he couldn’t be happier and he loves her. Terra says how could he not want another one of these, showing him Penny. She is very adorable. Joe says she’s not even a year old and she’s a big sis. Joe figures it must have happened on the camping trip and hopes they don’t have a wookiee.

Terra tells him that she told Elena and Tonya. She tears up, but Joe doesn’t think it’s a big deal. He says all he cares about it them and the baby being healthy. She says she knows he still has to deal with his health issues and encourages him to make an appointment for his shot. She wants him to get in shape with her and he says round is a shape. Ha-ha!

Terra wants to do a family photo shoot before she gets huge. She’s gotten matching onsie pajamas for them to wear. Joe isn’t thrilled and says he’ll look like a big, fuzzy tomato. He says he booked his cortisone shot. Terra is happy about that and he asks if that will give him a reprieve from the onsie idea, but that’s a no.

Joe and Terra go to Joe’s consultation. Joe is scared to death of needles, but he’s in so much pain, he has to lean on something when he stands. The doctor says it’s a safe procedure, but there are risks, and it doesn’t help everybody. He says it’s the size of an acupuncture needle, which surprises me.

It’s picture time! Joe says the onsie theme is weird and embarrassing and he can’t believe Terra is making him do it. She says it will be cute. We all agree one size does not fit all and Terra adjusts Joe’s outfit. They do look cute, but this seems like a picture you’d use for a Christmas card.

Joe says he doesn’t remember what it’s like for his back not to hurt and is hoping that the shot works for him. He wants to be able to interact with Penny and the new baby without pain. Terra tells him regardless, he’s a great father.

Terra goes with Joe to get his shot. He’s pretty nervous and remembers the surgeries he had when he was a kid. They have a problem with the IV and have to do it again. Ugh. I know how stressful that is, since it’s happened to me. They give Joe oxygen to help him relax. He thinks he’s going to pass out. He’s petrified of needles, but wants to be the best he can be for his family.

Joe tells the doctor he felt something and asks if it’s normal. The doctor thinks it’s okay. Everything seems to go well and Joe is in recovery. Terra tells him she’s proud of him. Joe says he’ll drive, but Terra is like, no.

A few days later, there’s no change, but the doctor says to give it some time. I hope it works for him. I feel invested in this. Joe and Terra go to the pre-natal appointment. Because Terra has irregular periods, the doctor thought it would take a while, so he’s surprised too. The doctor determines that she’s five weeks and five days. They do a sonogram. The doctor says at this point, all they’ll see is a gestational sack. Yep, there it is. The doctor says he doesn’t see the heartbeat yet and has them make another appointment. Terra asks if it’s possible there’s nothing there and the doctor says there’s always that possibility, but they have to wait and see.

Terra is worried about a miscarriage, and meets with Tonya for lunch since she doesn’t want to burden Joe. She tells Tonya what happened with the sonogram. She says it would be devastating if it was a false alarm. Tonya tells her not to cry and gives her a hug. She says everything will be okay and tells Terra to focus on Penny. They’re about to get the MRI results which will determine if Penny needs a shunt.

Terra thinks the decompression surgery really helped and hopes this is the last doctor visit they have for a while. Dr. Danielpour specializes in little people neurosurgery. They look at the results and it looks good. The doctor does point out the damage to the spinal cord which might never go away. Penny’s head size is checked. The doctor says they’re not out of the woods yet in terms of whether or not she needs a shunt. He says you don’t want to do it if you don’t have to, and they should know by the time she’s a year old.

Terra is kind of bummed, but Joe says that there was no diagnosis yet. She says she thought they were free and clear, and he says they’re not, but they can handle it.

It’s time for the next ultrasound. Terra is afraid if they lose the baby, Joe will change his mind about having a second one.

It’s there! Along with the heartbeat. Penny is a big sister. Happiness abounds!

The doctor asks if there’s been spotting and Terra says no. He says they don’t need to make restrictions then. Joe says they needed the good news. Terra says having Penny changed their lives, and Joe says they weren’t prepared for the half of it. Penny is developing at her own pace. Although the physical development is a beat behind, she’s on target mentally. They don’t know whether the baby will be a little person or average sized yet.

They say they still have a long way to go, but they’ll get through it together.

The Real Housewives of NYC

Duly noted that in her tagline, Ramona says that like wine, she gets better with time, not age.

Bethenny is loving the Hamptons. I would too if I had this house. She’s having an anything goes, no airs party.

John and Dorinda are staying at Jules’s place. Dorinda says John is going to be a gentleman and apologize. John acts clueless, but we see a conversation where Dorinda tells him what an a-hole he was. She coaches him on what to say. Jules tells him not to add fuel to the fire. Dorinda asks if they have to review everything again. Jules says deep down John is a teddy bear, but that’s not what I’d call him.

Carole arrives at Bethenny’s with her dog. A playmate for Cookie! This time it’s a real barbecue, not a Kyle Richards barbecue. Bethenny tells Carole about what happened with John at the bra after party. She says she needs to back off because Dorinda and John obviously have something odd going on. She’s surprised he’s coming to the party. Bethenny warns Carole that the Countess will be there. Carole says her plan is to keep a friendly distance.

Ramona is next with some guy whose name I missed, but I don’t think he’s a date. It’s autumn and just gorgeous outside. A crowd gathers quickly. Okay, Ramona’s guest is talking about smokey eyes. He’s definitely not a date.

Carole tells her Jules is having a brunch, but Ramona will be busy recovering from her date. Here come Dorinda, John, Jules and Michael. John wants to just hang out by the cocktail bar, but Dorinda says that’s not happening. Jules says she would never want to be in John’s position.

John flounders, standing by himself. Bethenny points everyone toward the food. Dorinda says Bethenny is ignoring John and prompts him to talk to her. He claims to not be nervous and he probably isn’t because he’s too stupid to be. Bethenny thinks neither one of them probably remembers the incident. She thinks she should have been honest and told Dorinda not to bring him.

John wanders around with a drink in his hand like an alcoholic dinosaur. He finally parks himself near Dorinda who is sitting with Ramona and Jules.

The Countess arrives. Carole says she always seems to make an entrance. The Countess immediately picks up a hula hoop and fails at it miserably. Dorinda introduces her to Jules and Michael. Bethenny tells Carole the Countess is clearly uncomfortable. Since she can’t find a place to sit, the Countess sits with Dorinda and company.

Carole says she feels badly for John. Bethenny says it’s time to hit the bar. She has a whole separate bar on her property and it’s the coolest thing. She talks about John lurking in the shadows. She talks to the Countess, asking if she’s uncomforable with Carole. The Countess says she thinks Carole is the one who’s uncomfortable. Bethenny says the Countess doesn’t get it and doesn’t remember anything past five minutes ago. Bethenny says she has her own bs and feels like she’s hiding at her own party. The Countess asks why she just didn’t un-invite John and Bethenny says something about Dorinda being fragile.

Ramona jets, saying the party is weird. Bethenny tries to get the Countess to talk to Carole and she says she needs a drink.

Finally it happens. John asks for Bethenny’s attention. He sits next to her, and she and Carole leave to get a drink. Bethenny says don’t follow the tiger in the cage. Dorinda is a little annoyed, saying at least be nice to guests you invited.

The Countess tells Carole that she can’t avoid her forever, but Carole says yes she can. Bethenny comes back out with s’mores stuff. Carole says that John is like a little boy, pulling the ponytail of a girl he likes. Everyone has s’mores. The Countess tells Carole they need to talk at some point, but she’s glad to see her since she hasn’t in so long. Carole says of course not. The last time they talked, they ended up screaming at each other.

The Countess wants to go aside, but Carole says say whatever right here. The Countess says they’ve both said hurtful things, but Carole says no, the Countess said hurtful things. She says the Countess said a lot of crazy stuff on social media, like that Carole broke up her niece and Adam. She was even talking about Carole’s writing. The Countess, who can’t come up with one thing Carole has said about her, says they can agree to not be friends, but be nice to each other when they see each other. In her interview, Carole points out there was no apology. The Countess tells Bethenny that Carole didn’t give her a chance to apologize. Jules says the brunch is going to be a sh*tshow because she didn’t realize the Countess and Carole didn’t get along.

John corners Bethenny in the bar. She tells him to step outside if he wants to talk. Bethenny says she doesn’t know what he remembers and he just thinks he was rude. She says she doesn’t care about his personality, but he came in thinking he had a smoking gun and said some uneducated things. He says she does that too, but he’s not going into it because it’s her birthday party. What it really is, is like the Countess, he can’t come up with any actual examples. He says Bethenny said things to upset Dorinda, but doesn’t know exactly what Bethenny said. He says she called him an opportunist and that’s what Bethenny is. She says yes, but not on the backs of other people. He says he apologizes for going out of bounds for someone he loved. Bethenny says he doesn’t even know what he’s apologizing for and the details are at the bottom of a tequila bottle somewhere.

Jules thinks Bethenny is selfish because she’s not ignoring John’s alcoholic idiocy. Dorinda is embarrassed by the whole thing and the Countess follows her outside. Dorinda says she’s trying to establish a relationship with Bethenny and keep her relationship with John going. Bethenny says she’ll have to put aside being repulsed by John because she really does like Dorinda and it’s not cool for party guests to be crying.

The Countess and Dorinda are leaving. Bethenny tells Dorinda that she and John can be cordial for her sake. She finds John and tells him that Dorinda is the most upset of the three of them, like a kid in a divorce, and that everything is fine between them. They leave happy. Bethenny says this is the best birthday she’s ever had since she’s not crying in a bathroom or divorced, and she hasn’t verbally assaulted anyone.

It’s time for brunch at Jules’s house. John brings out one of the biggest bottles of wine I’ve ever seen. He gets nosy about the Countess and Carole. Bethenny thought there was going to be a crowd, but Carole tells her there’s only going to be seven of them. Bethenny has brought cinnamon babka. I just had my first babka — a chocolate one — and it was amazing.

John answers the door, not exactly putting Bethenny at ease. Construction is going on and Jules tells them it’s a seven year project. We flash back to Alex and Simon’s three year project a million years ago. They start to eat and Bethenny talks construction with Michael. No surprise, Bethenny has a lot of unwelcome opinions.

Michael asks how Bethenny enjoyed her birthday. A bee comes in the house and John says he’s allergic. In her interview, Bethenny wonders if it’s bad to want to cover him in honey. Bethenny points out to Carole that Jules isn’t eating. She says it’s textbook to have a lot of food out and push it on other people.

The Countess makes her entrance, toting a guy named Paul. Jules is going to have a tour of the house and Carole wants to leave. Michael ropes Bethenny and Michael into a mini tour. They come across the great leveler — dog poop. No matter how rich you are, your dog will still poop on the floor. Bethenny and Carole slip out.

Jules gripes to Dorinda about Bethenny. Dorinda feels badly because Bethenny burst Jules’s bubble with her negativity.

Next week, Jules is having a hard time with Bethenny’s opinions, Ramona visits her daughter, Jules talks about eating disorders, and the Countess and Bethenny get into it.

April 20, 2016 — GH, Lotsa Little & NYC Wives Plus John

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Carrrlos picks on Anna saying she’s just another perp. She says she’s sure he’s happy, but he says he didn’t turn her in; he never said a word about her. Anna calls him soulless and he says his soul belongs to Sabrrrina and his baby.

Felix and Michael talk. Michael is hoping Sabrrrina comes out of hiding and Felix says if he hears anything he’ll call Michael. Griff says sorry to eavesdrop, but he heard Felix talking about Carrrlos. Felix asks why he would be interested and Griff says he’s Duke’s son.

Michael drops by Dante’s place. Dante is obviously getting ready for a date night with Lulu, lighting candles and opening wine. He tells Michael it’s part of their couples therapy. At the MetroCourt, Lulu tells Laura she’s got a sitter for Rocco because she and Dante are doing a couples’ exercise. Laura says she’s looking pretty good for just doing therapy.

Lulu tells Laura it’s been a while since she and Dante consciously coupled. Laura thinks tonight is a good opportunity, but Lulu says the therapist said that’s a no for now, and she doesn’t want to jinx things. Laura tells Lulu she’s meeting with the cryptographer again and tells her that it’s Doc, and his hobby is breaking codes.

Michael tells Dante about his conversation with Felix and wonders if there’s any news about Sabrrrina on Dante’s end. Dante tells him they’re building a case against Carrrlos, but the rest is up to the Feds. He tells Michael not to be stupid looking for Sabrrrina.

Felix explains to Griff who Sabrrrina is to him and to Carrrlos. Griff is surprised to find that Carrrlos is a father.

Anna says that Carrrlos understands what it’s like to be a parent. She says part of it is being responsible for your actions, which is why they’re both there. She tells him how he didn’t just shatter her life, but Emma’s and Robin’s, and she has no sympathy for him whatsoever. She says now that he’s known the joy of being a parent, she hopes he suffers more being separated from his child.

Jason comes in to tell Sam good-night. She says he doesn’t have to leave. Looks like he’s staying.

Griff says he thought being on staff would be a good opportunity to meet people who knew his father, but he didn’t anticipate meeting people who knew Carrrlos. Michael comes by and tells them about Anna being arrested.

Carrrlos says he has family too, and did she think of that before she shot him? Anna says it was a set-up. He says she could have trusted the system but didn’t. She says Duke was unarmed. Carrrlos tells her to stop kidding herself and that Duke was no angel. Anna says he was getting out of the business and Carrrlos stole their second chance at happiness. She says he stole it from Duke’s son too, and he’ll never know his father because of Carrrlos.

Laura asks what happened to the envelope that Helena left to Lulu. Lulu says she shoved it somewhere and hopes she forgets about it. Funny. I could have sworn she left it at Windemere. Lulu says Helena said she’d need it when her life is empty and it’s hardly that. She leaves and Laura has a Helena memory. Doc comes in and asks her if she’s all right.

Michael wonders why Anna confessed since Carrrlos isn’t dead. Felix says maybe her conscious bothered her. Michael says Carrrlos says Sabrrrina and the baby are safe, but his word is meaningless.

Griff comes running into the jail, since everyone can just come and go with no security, and asks what he can do for Anna. He doesn’t believe she shot anyone, but she says yep, she did.

Lulu arrives at Dante’s and asks if Maxie helped him with the atmosphere. He says no, he wanted things perfect for her. She makes it clear she wants to stick to the plan and not risk progress by moving too fast. Dante wants her to see something first. He takes her hand.

Laura says she’s fine, and she and Doc sit down. She says she was just remembering how horrible Helena was and how relentless. She says she half-expects Helena to come and sit down at the table. Doc says, isn’t she already? How psychiatrist of him.

Jason and Sam are making out and Jason has a memory flash. He says they were on the bed kissing. Sam says it was the last night they were there together before he got shot. She says she’s memorized every detail of their time together and never thought they’d be there together again. She says it’s a miracle and he asks why she isn’t smiling then. She says she knows how fragile life is and she couldn’t stand to lose him again.

Dante shows Lulu a new bed, since the old one didn’t make Lulu too happy the last time she was there. They work on the exercise — rebuilding intimacy. They both sit on the bed. They’re supposed to stare into each other’s eyes for four minutes with no talking or touching.

Michael says Sabrrrina is in a lose-lose situation and he has to find a way to fix it. He’s going to have to go to Puerto Rico.

Anna explains what happened the night she shot Carrrlos. I guess Griff doesn’t notice Carrrlos in the next cell. Griff is finding Anna’s story hard to take because he doesn’t want to believe she would shoot someone in cold blood. She says she violated her principles and ran from it. She says she wanted to face the consequences of what she did. Griff says he’s having a hard time wrapping his head around it and Carrrlos says believe it, he was there. Anna tells Griff that’s Carrrlos.

Doc tells Laura he decoded two words — heartbreak hotel. He asks if that means anything.

Sam apologizes for being afraid and says she never used to be that way. She says everything changed when Jason got shot. She had lost the man she planned on spending the rest of her life with. Jason says he’s not planning on going anywhere, so they’re good. They kiss.

Griff says in the name of some meaningless mob war, Carrrlos killed his father in cold blood. Anna tells Griff he didn’t stop there, and this is the man he wants them to forgive. Carrrlos says he was trying to feed his child and it’s more complicated than Anna spins it. Griff asks if Carrrlos is sorry.

Dante keeps touching Lulu’s leg and talking. They start to kiss. So much for the exercise. The timer goes off unnoticed.

Jason and Sam have pillow talk. She says she used to dread the mornings because for a second when she woke up, she would forget she was a widow. Jason says now they can wake up next to each other every morning.

Laura wonders if Helena was an Elvis fan. Doc asks if there’s any significance at all. Laura says everyone has been lonely in a hotel. Doc says he has, and tells her about when Lucy was revealed kissing Scotty at the Nurses Ball. He says it’s ironic the book belonged to him. Laura talks about when her marriage to Scotty ended. She wonders what anything has to do with Helena.

Sam wakes up hearing noises. She envisions Helena, who asks if she can’t sleep.

Michael says he can at least talk to Sabrrrina’s father. Felix says he’s coming along.

Carrrlos says to be sorry, he’d have to admit guilt, and even if he was, what difference would it make? Griff says he could start to forgive him. Carrrlos says he doesn’t need Griff’s forgiveness. Griff tells Anna that if they don’t find a way to forgive, they’ll never be free and Carrrlos will have taken their souls the same way he took Duke. Anna tells Carrrlos that Griff is sweet but doesn’t speak for her. she’ll never make peace with him.

Lulu and Dante bask in the afterglow. She wonders what to tell the therapist since they failed the exercise. Dante says it seemed pretty intimate to him. He says he didn’t remember it being so good. Lulu says she was so angry for so long, she can’t believe she was so willing to let everything go. She says she’s happy. Dante thinks they should do more exercises.

Doc asks what Helena said on the video. Laura tells him she said that Laura had taken from her what she loved the most. Laura isn’t sure if she meant Mikos or Stavros. She said she was being the better person and giving Laura the key to what she loved and lost. Doc said if Helena is telling the truth, something Laura loved and lost in a place that’s like a heartbreak hotel. What a genius! Laura thinks they’re wasting time. Doc says he just needs to spend more time with it and wonders if the hotel is literal or symbolic. They toast.

Helena tells Sam she didn’t pay attention to her words and she should have. Helena tells her to remember the curse, and that Sam and her loved ones will never know happiness in this life or any other. Sam calls out to Jason who was checking on Danny. She says she had a nightmare, but he tells her everything is fine.

Tomorrow, Carly tells Sonny to make a wish, Olivia sees Ned, and Paul tells Anna she’s not getting out on bail.

Little Women: LA

Matt creates atmosphere in the honeymoon hotel room with rose petals. I honestly don’t understand that rose petal thing. They stick to you and die quickly. On second thought, maybe it is appropriate here. Briana talks about Christy showing up at the wedding. She says she was nervous at first, but was glad Matt called her. That ought to be good for extra honeymoon nookie. Briana is hoping with time, the others come around and accept their relationship.

I’m starving and my soup is too hot. This has nothing to do with the show. I’m having dinner.

Christy says she has big news for Todd. She brings out a cupcake and tells Todd it’s like a fortune cookie. There’s a plastic baby inside. They’ve been matched at an adoption agency. They have to hurry with the paperwork as there are other couples in line, but they’re the best fit. The baby is from Bulgaria.

Tonya and Terra go baby shopping with Elena. She’s five months along and has nothing. They want to throw her a baby shower. Elena wants all the girls to be there. She tells them about Briana’s wedding, saying there weren’t that many people, but it was beautiful. She tells them about Christy showing up and Tonya asks if she was in a wheelchair. Ha-ha! Terra doesn’t really want to see her after she made such a big public deal about getting “injured” when Terra threw ice tea at her. Elena claims Christy wants to apologize.

Briana and Christy go out for ice cream. Now I want ice cream because my soup is still too hot. They talk about the baby shower and Christy wonders why there isn’t one for Briana. Now, why would anyone expect Terra and/or Tonya to do that when they weren’t even invited to the wedding? And shouldn’t Christy be the one to throw it? Christy talks about her injury. She says she’s willing to drop the charges, but wants a public apology from Terra. Good luck getting that.

Commercial break. Who thinks the La-Z-Boy commercial where Brook Shields is married to “Stavros” is a nod to General Hospital? Raise your hands. Yep. Thought so.

Elena is at the doctor with Preston and Terra tagging along. They’re going to find out what the sex of the baby is and whether Elena will be able to deliver naturally. The doctor says women with twins are higher risk whether a little person or not. The doctor isn’t opposed to Elena trying natural birth, but she suggests a C-section. Elena says she’s pretty sure little people deliver naturally in Russia all the time.

We find out that Elena is having two boys or “double trouble,” as the doctor calls them.

It’s baby shower time! Only Christy hasn’t RSVP’d. Terra says she’s going to be cool with Briana because she’s pregnant. Briana tells Terra that Christy wants a public apology and adds that on the way there she got a call from a detective. Terra says all the more reason for her not to say anything. As if on cue, here comes Christy.

Terra, whose lipstick matches her purple scarf, says she lost her appetite. Terra and Tonya toast to the babies. Elena and Preston reveal the gender with silly string. Terra says Penny will have two boyfriends to pick from.

Terra talks to Briana and Jasmine and says she knows how Matt feels a little bit now, with all the lies going on. She says whenever anyone does a background check on her, for a job or anything else, it’s going to come up in the search.

Jasmine and Tonya approach Christy. Jasmine says they were both in the wrong. Tonya tells her that even if Christy drops the charges, it’s a matter of public record now. Terra says she has nothing to say and walks away. Tonya tells her to just let Christy talk, but Terra says that the police report will always be on her record.

Christy tells Elena that what Terra did was aggravated assault. Terra leaves, and everyone else starts to trickle out. Christy feels responsible for putting a damper on the party.

Matt insists he and Briana are having a boy. Like Elena, Briana isn’t getting an amnio test because it’s risky. Yep, it’s a boy. Briana already has a girl, so she’s pretty excited.

Three weeks later. Terra talks with Tonya and Jasmine. Matt is sending d*ck pics again. A few women have sent cell phone conversations to Terra. She says he was doing it the whole time they were in Mexico. Jasmine feels sick, since she’s been supporting him. Apparently, Matt also had a conversation with Joe where he said he’d never kill or hurt Briana, but he sexts with other women. That’s somewhat distressing.

Tonya says now Jasmine sees what they’ve seen all along. Jasmine asks if they can put the issues with Christy aside and get together to discuss it. They agree. This is sad.

Terra discusses the intervention with Joe. He wonders why they’re wasting their time. Terra also found out Matt has a Tinder account and wonders if he’s physically cheating on Briana too. She tells Joe about Matt’s previous relationship where there were abuse charges. She discovered he made a plea bargain when he’s been saying the charges were dropped. Terra says she wouldn’t be a good friend if she didn’t make a try. Terra wants to let Briana stay at their house, but Joe says no because of Penny. He says they have their own problems and he doesn’t want a dangerous situation around Penny. Terra walks out.

The girls gather at Jasmine’s place. Briana has been staying away from the group since she found out that Matt has been sending inappropriate texts again. She found out on Valentine’s Day, no less. She wanted to kick him out, but she says they’re married and she felt that she couldn’t do that. Jasmine asks if Briana considers it cheating and she says yes. Terra says he talks poorly about Briana in the texts as well. She says she’s gotten messages from five different women.

Briana says she’s torn because she knows people have issues and make mistakes. She says her mind can’t grasp what’s happening and she can’t turn to her family. She says it’s for better or worse and you work it out. Elena says it’s beyond a second chance now. Tonya says Briana is making excuses and the relationship is toxic for both her and the children. She tells Briana she got married under false pretenses since Matt’s actions don’t show he loves her.

Briana feels confused. Elena says he’s just a man in her life, not her life. Elena thinks she’s scared that she won’t find someone else, and she needs to learn how to love herself. Christy thinks Matt has an addiction problem. Elena thinks that’s just an excuse, but Christy says he needs to go to rehab. Briana makes more excuses and Tonya brings up that he’s been doing it for a while and he was doing it in Mexico. Briana feels violated and embarrassed. She wants to hate Matt and feels sorry for him at the same time. She tells the girls she’s literally lost. They just had their wedding and were celebrating her pregnancy. She says no one sees what she sees.

Jasmine says she’s been supportive of Matt, but she doesn’t think he cares about Briana. if Briana stays with him, she’ll hurt forever, but if she leaves, it will just hurt for a while. Jasmine is very astute tonight. She tells Briana that her home is open to her, her daughter and the baby. In her individual interview, Jasmine says she’s scared for Briana and wants nothing to do with Matt. Terra says despite the past, Briana has family in all of them and she should never feel trapped.

Briana thanks them, but says she wants to take time to make a decision. She has to talk to Matt, so she’s going to leave and deal with that. Terra gives her copies of some of the texts.

Briana says whatever she decides, it will be in the best interest of her children.

This is the finale. Briana is still with Matt and still can’t decide.

Terra’s Little Family

Terra agrees to talk to Olivia. She tells Olivia she doesn’t want her to leave, but they need to communicate better. She says Penny is her first child and can they agree to twice a day phone calls. Olivia says that’s fine.

Traci has had her baby boy. Terra visits with Joe and Penny. Traci’s baby, Jacob, is average sized. Joe watches football with Traci’s husband while the ladies talk.

Terra tells Joe she’s signed them up for yoga class. Joe is like, no way, and makes a million excuses. He says he’d rather they get a Brazilian wax together. I’ll bet not though.

Penny shoots some hoops with her brother. She tells him about wanting another baby and how Joe isn’t keen on it. She says a lot of things are a challenge for Joe because of his back. She wants Joe to see a doctor. Her brother tells her not to bite off more han she can chew.

Terra forces Joe to go to yoga class. He says parts of his body are being bent that haven’t moved in years. No surprise, he makes jokes throughout the class. Terra notices that Joe has to modify all of the positions. She suggests again that he see the doctor and says he should do it for Penny. Joe had four surgeries when he was younger and doesn’t want another one. Terra says sooner or later, he’s going to have to do something. Joe has to admit his life would be better and agrees to making an appointment.

One week later. Joe tells the doctor he’s felt a degeneration in his back. The doctor asks about holding Penny and Joe admits it’s difficult. They look at Joe’s back X-rays and it’s obvious there’s a serious situation going on. The doctor says it will be a progressive problem. They’d be doing a fushion with rods implanted. The doctor says it’s fixable, but it will be an eight hour surgery. In the meantime, Joe can get steroid shots, but it’s only a temporary solution.

Joe wants to take a year to prepare, but Terra thinks he should just get it over with. She asks the doctor about his recovery time. The doctor says he’ll need help with most things.

On the way home, Terra says she was surprised at how extensive the problem was. Joe says they need to wait on baby number two. Terra says he should have the surgery soon then, but Joe says he thinks it should happen when it’s absolutely necessary. They both think the other one is being selfish. Joe thinks they should have as few children as possible. Terra doesn’t want to abandon her dream of a bigger family. Joe adds that all kinds of things could go wrong. He says at the end of the day it’s his back and he needs support in his decisions. Joe says right now he’s not ready for back surgery and he’s not ready for another baby.

Joe’s band is playing a gig. They’re a cover band called Nirvanish. Terra also has a show coming up, doing some songs from Penny’s Playlist. She asks Joe to play for her and he wants to make a wager. He says more people will show up for his band than for her performance. If he wins, she has to dress up like a French maid, if she wins, he has to bathe the dogs. Joe’s band gets a pretty good crowd.

Terra thinks they should start water safety measures since they have a pool and a baby. Joe thinks it’s crazy and that Penny is too young, but both Terra and I disagree.

Joe and Terra take Penny to swim class. It looks like a lot of fun. First they just pour water on the baby’s head and make whee! sounds, then the babies get dipped underwater. The instructor helps Terra with that part. Joe claims he had a couple of mini strokes while watching.

Terra is trying to expand her brand with the Penny’s Playlist album. Joe’s band will play when she and Tonya are making costume changes. The crowd isn’t exactly huge, but the kids seem like they’re having fun. Terra feels that it was a success and Joe tells her to get out the French maid outfit. Terra actually looks more like a Swiss maid.

Elena and Tonya meet Terra for lunch. She asks Elena how the pregnancy is going. Elena asks her if she’s convinced Joe to have another baby yet. Tonya thinks another baby will be hard along with Joe’s surgery. Elena agrees. She tells them to shut up because she’s pregnant. Elena asks if she’s kidding and Terra runs from the table.

Next week, Terra is scared, Terra tells Joe about the pregnancy, and Joe gets an injection.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Back at the bra party, Dorinda is having a smoke outside. Jules tries to smooth things over and they both go back inside. Jules tells Ramona that Dorinda is upset. The bra ladies just ignore all of it and keep working on fittings. Bethenny suggests Ramona apologize to Dorinda.

Ramona practices her apology and apologizes the same way she walked the runway — like an awkward robot. Dorinda calls it a drive-by shooting. Ramona leaves and Jules says Ramona has no filter. Dorinda no longer wants to go to Ramona’s for the weekend. She calls John.

At first he’s on speaker and obviously knows he’s been talked about. Bethenny wants to know who the rat is. John comes upstairs. I like him less every time I see him. Bethenny and Jules are still there, and Bethenny says he’s a little “lit up.”

John asks if Bethenny knows his friend who owns SkinnyCow and says something about her stealing his name. Bethenny explains that a girl and a cow are different. Dorinda tells him not to start problems with Bethenny and to get out. Bethenny says something about the issue they’ve been hiding and I’m not sure what she’s talking about, except she did say something about doing lines. Dorinda keeps telling John to leave and says they’ve both hurt her.

Dorinda calls John an embarrassment and finally gets him out the door. Bethenny tells Jules she feels vindicated. Dorinda comes back and says it’s unheard of. Bethenny says no it’s not, and tells her she’s in a relationship where she obviously doesn’t know what to do. John pops back in and Jules gets him back out again.

In the hallway, John tells Jules that Bethenny is jealous. She tells him not to give everyone ammo. He says he’ll wait downstairs for Dorinda and to send her up. What’s wrong with this sentence? Bethenny tells Dorinda nothing is a big deal. Dorinda says she doesn’t want to move forward with the other women or John, she just wants to go home and cry. After they’re gone, Bethenny tells Jules that John doesn’t make Dorinda happy like she says.

Carole calls Bethenny and asks what happened when she left, since she passed John on the way out. She says when she left, she thought it couldn’t get any worse, but she was wrong. Bethenny says they’ll talk later and asks if Carole is coming to her party. Carole says she’d rather not be around the Countess, but she’ll ignore it. She asks if it’s a bad time to call Dorinda, since she forgot the bras she bought, but Bethenny says she should wait on that.

The Countess is meeting with a realtor who she was once roommates with. Sonja comes along to look at apartments. Do I really need to say how fabulous the apartment is? And how great the view is? The realtor wants to show her something downtown as well, but Sonja is like, why?

Why? Because it’s even more amazing than the other place.

Bethenny is going over a new Skinny Girl promotion with her assistants. She also has to sign off on one of the many divorce bills. Ramona comes by the office. She reads a bunch of messages from Dorinda who basically blew her off. Ramona thinks she’s taking what she said too hard and thinks she hit a nerve. Bethenny says the reason she’s so defensive is that she knows what they’re saying is true. She tells Ramona about John showing up at the bra party. She says what they’ve been saying showed up. She thinks Dorinda is hooked on the action, but knows that John isn’t good for her.

Ramona asks what Jules said, but Bethenny doesn’t remember. They call her. Bethenny tells her that Ramona is there and asks about her view of the situation with John. In her individual interview, Jules says she felt like she was under seige. Jules somewhat defends them since they’re the ones who introduced her to the group.

Bethenny suggests she, Ramona and Dorinda have dinner. Bethenny wonders if John will honor her dry cleaning gift certificate now and says she’ll go in under the name of SkinnyCow.

John and Dorinda are staying with Jules and Michael in the Hamptons. John says he’d rather sleep in his car than at Ramona’s house. Jules fills Michael in that they’ll be staying with them, even though their house is under construction.

Commercial break. In the new line picture of the NYC Wives, they’re all dressed in black and look like vampires.

Bethenny is getting ready for the dinner with Dorinda and Ramona. She wants Dorinda to admit she needs to reevaluate her relationship, but realistically knows it could go several different ways.

Jules and Michael’s house is massive. She says it’s a never-ending project. They do a quick Shabbat using Hawaiian Punch and breadsticks. I like it.

Dorinda and John (bleh) arrive. Dorinda excuses herself for the dinner. She says she just wants to say her peace, but she and Ramona’s friendship is liked a cracked mirror now. She says Bethenny thinks she’s being helpful, but Ramona has been her friend since the earth cooled. She says if you’re not nice to John, you’re out. Michael asks what she wants and she says not anything really. She says she feels betrayed and humiliated and gets teary-eyed.

Michael and Dorinda have to explain “Et tu, Brute?” to Jules, while John pretends to know what they’re talking about.

Ramona meets Bethenny at the restaurant first. Ramona tells Bethenny that Dorinda isn’t staying at her house. Bethenny thinks Dorinda shouldn’t be mad at her. Ramona says being a true friend means no restrictions of topics. While I usually don’t agree with her, I do this time.

Dorinda has every intention of letting Ramona know she’s a piece of doo-doo. She arrives at the restaurant and calls it round two. Bethenny asks if she and Ramona are okay. Dorinda says she doesn’t understand how Ramona could have said what she did in front of everyone and it was despicable. Bethenny says she should check herself and that when John came in, he proved her right. She says Dorinda is in denial. Dorinda says she can do what she wants. Bethenny says John attacked her and Dorinda says she is sorry for that. She says she chooses John though, and maybe she should see them apart from him.

Dorinda says she’s has enough negativity. Bethenny says she’s sorry Dorinda is so torn and Ramona says she didn’t mean to hurt Dorinda. Dorinda says she loves John and Bethenny tells her not to settle for less then she deserves. Dorinda belives Ramona is truly sorry for crossing the line, but she’d be lying if she said all was well.

Next week, the Hamptons, John apologize…sort of, and the Countess and Carole tangle.

April 13, 2016 — GH, Little LA, Little Family & a Lotta NYC

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Carrrlos has been shot.

Michael asks Carly what they should say to Morgan about Sonny. Carly wants to see how he’s doing first.

Kiki video chats with Morgan and shows him her wound. She says she’ll never wear a bikini again and will have to make up a story about being in a knife fight, because the truth, which most likely made the front page, isn’t interesting enough. She’s getting out of the hospital today.

Julian and Alexis are relaxing at the bar. Alexis is happy about coming to an understanding with Kristina. She says as progressive as she thinks she is, she was caught off guard and didn’t react well. She says meeting with Parker was over-the-top, but beneficial. Alexis worries about how Sonny will handle it.

Jordan finds what Paul’s telling her about Anna difficult to believe. Paul says Carrrlos was unarmed when Anna shot him. Jordan remembers Anna saying something about the truth coming out and asks Paul how he knows all this. Paul says Anna’s the one who told him.

Sonny is about to shoot Carrrlos again, when Anna asks what he’s doing. He says getting justice for Duke. No, no, no, Sonny. That was not the agreement.

Morgan asks how Kiki is doing. She says despite her overreaction when the orderly dropped the tray, she’s doing well. Ava comes in and so does Carly on Morgan’s end, so they hang up. Ava tells Kiki that she’s getting discharged. Kiki says she’s looking forward to a new view. She says she wants to go home and live with Ava and Avery.

Julian talks about Lucas coming out to him and gives Sonny the benefit of the doubt. Alexis says something about Julian getting out of the mob and he practically chokes on his drink. She goes to see if their table is ready, and Julian’s phone rings. It’s Hammer. Isn’t there a Hammer in 13 Ghosts?

Jordan wonders why Anna would have told Paul anything. He says he thought it was the confession of a guilty mind. He says he has no intention of pressing charges, but just wants to get Anna back home. He leaves and Jordan leaves Anna a voicemail to call her immediately. As she’s about to leave, Andre is on the porch and asks if Anna is in trouble. Jordan says she thinks so, but he probably already knew that.

Sonny prattles on about everything bad Carrrlos has ever done. He says if he doesn’t kill him, his position is weakened. Anna says Sonny doesn’t give a damn about justice. He says it’s personal and good business. Anna says what about Julian. Sonny says he’ll get his too. Anna says Duke was the man she loved and they’re doing it her way.

Carly says Morgan seems more upbeat. He says he doesn’t have a choice since it’s mental health 24/7 there. Carly asks how the meds adjustment is going and Morgan says he thinks they’re getting closer and he feels less stoned. Carly says Sonny went through that and BTW, Sonny won’t be making it today. She tells Morgan about Sonny going after Carrrlos in South America.

Sonny says he doesn’t take orders from Anna. Anna says her business is justice and she’s tried her whole life to uphold the law, but abandoned it when she shot Carrrlos. She says she’s done sacrificing her principles and Carrrlos has to face charges. Sonny says what if he doesn’t agree and Anna says then he’ll have to kill her too. She says he might think it’s futile, but bringing Duke’s killer to justice is the last thing she can do for the man she loves. She asks Sonny to be a gentleman and let her do that. Sonny steps away and Anna handcuffs Carrrlos.

Andre says he was there earlier and Anna was acting strange, so he came back to check on her. Jordan tells him about the arrest warrant.

Paul comes to the hospital. Dillon sees him and says Tracy is asleep. Paul says he’s not there for a visit. Dillon asks what’s up with his wrist and Paul says he’s there to get it looked at. Dillon asks what happened.

Kiki tells Ava she felt they were making progress before she got shot and the nurses have told her how Ava has been looking after her. Ava says how wonderful it feels to hear her say that. Kiki say she wants to be a family with her mother and sister, but Ava says she can’t.

Julian tells Hammer they need to set up a meeting. Alexis comes back and asks what’s up with the phone call. Julian says it’s work related. She says she overheard the word “trouble,” and got angina, and asks what’s going on with the business. Julian says there’s something she doesn’t know and it’s time for him to confess.

Morgan says he wishes he could help, but he knows that’s not what Sonny wants and it’s best he stays away from the business altogether. He says there’s no point in worrying about what he can’t fix and he just wants to get back to his life and Kiki.

Ava tells Kiki she wouldn’t be safe. Kiki asks if Avery is in danger and Ava says she’s been staying with Sonny. Kiki asks how much trouble Ava is in. Ava says some people are unhappy with her because of her involvement with law enforcement.

Alexis asks if the truth is going to jeopardize their life together. Julian says he hopes not and tells her about what happened with Crimson and how Nina ended up with complete control. Alexis says what Julian did is probably unethical, but not against the law; still, he did the right thing. Alexis says she has to admit when she heard the word trouble, she thought he was back with the mob.

The padre wakes up and Sonny explains what’s going on. Anna sterilizes Carrrlos’s wound. She says she wants him to be totally healthy when he stands trial. Carrrlos says she shot him in cold blood and asks if she thinks this will make up for it. Anna says the sooner they can get out of there the better.

Sonny tells Carrrlos he owes Anna his life. Carrrlos says she’s going to be disappointed because he’s going to walk. Sonny says he’s going to die one way or the other. He disrespected Sonny and now he’s going to pay with his life. Sonny, a man of cliches.

Jordan tells Andre what Anna did to Paul. Andre has a hard time believing it. He says as vengeful as she seems against Carrrlos, he doesn’t think she could kill him. Jordan tells him about Anna shooting Carrrlos. She adds that clearly, it isn’t news to him.

Morgan says at first, he thought the pills would fix everything, but once he understood he also had to pull his own weight, he felt better. Carly says everyone is proud of him and loves him. She says she talked to his doctor though, and there’s still more work to do, and he needs to focus on more than just getting out. Morgan says he’s supposed to set goals and that’s what he’s doing. He says everyone needs to stop telling him how to feel. In her quest to keep it real, Carly has become a wet blanket.

Kiki says she thought something was going on between Paul and Ava. Ava says it was only business, but not business she wanted to be involved in. She says she hopes Julian can help set things right and that Kiki should focus on her recovery. She suggests Kiki move back in with Franco.

Dillon asks how Paul got hurt. Paul says it was a refresher course in defense. Paul tells Dillon it’s time to start focusing on his own life and find a girl. Dillon says he’s finally got a great job and Tracy is doing better, so he has everything he needs right now. He’s also glad that Paul is acting like a dad and Paul says he’s thrilled to be one.

Andre says as a professional, he’s learned not to react, and he’s just trying to process things, but Jordan says she thinks he’s hiding something. She says she needs to know if Anna shared anything with him as a patient.

Back on the plane, Sonny tells Carrrlos to shut up or he’ll knock his teeth out. Anna says she has chloroform if he needs it. Ha-ha! They’re ready to leave, but the guard comes in and says they’re not going anywhere — except maybe to jail for assault.

Andre says he’s a doctor and he takes his oath seriously. He says his allegiance is to his patient and that includes confidentiality.

Anna apologizes, but says they had an urgent matter and that Carrrlos is wanted in the US. Sonny concurs and the guard says Robert already called him, so he knows they’re telling the truth. However, no matter what the US government has to say, he doesn’t like being assaulted. Carrrlos tries to act like they should stick together, but the guard tells him the only place he’s going is jail. Sonny brings up some bigwig’s name, saying he does a lot of business with him, and all is forgiven. When the guard leaves, Anna asks Sonny if they know what kind of business he does with the bigwig and he says probably not. Neither do I. Since we’re never told exactly what it is that Sonny does.

Morgan says Kiki needs him. Carly says the doctors are helping her recover and that’s what Morgan needs to do. Morgan says Kiki is gong home today and that’s what he needs to do — go home.

Kiki is ready to leave and sees Dillon. She says he’s that guy from Halloween and mentions the infamous sizzle reel. He says that’s a bad first impression and introduces himself. He says he’d like to apologize. She says for what, a bad video? He says no, that his dad is Paul. She says it’s not necessary, she has the same deal with her mother, and he’s not responsible for what his dad does. She says she won’t ask him about his dad if he doesn’t ask her about her mother. There’s a somewhat loud sound and Kiki freaks a little and crouches down.

Carly says if Kiki is going home it’s because her doctors decided that, not her, and Morgan has to wait for his doctors to give the okay. Michael says he won’t do Kiki any good if he leaves too soon and has another episode.

Like Kiki is having right now. She tells Dillon now he knows her secret, she’s a big chicken. Ava comes back and tells Kiki to get back in the hospital rule wheelchair and wheels her out.

Andre says he’s told Jordan everything he can. She says the conversation is over then, and she has to get back. She tells him if he hears from Anna, to let her know that Jordan needs to talk to her asap.

After he leaves, Andre calls Anna’s voicemail. He tells her to call him right away when she gets the message.

Paul tells Julian about Carrrlos being brought back to Port Charles. He says he understands that Carrrlos is a new father and might not want to spend too much time in jail. He says Carrrlos might turn on his former boss. Julian acts clueless. Paul says he might want to get his ducks in a row in case he wants to take care of anything.

Carrrlos tells Anna it’s not too late to let him vanish along with what he knows. He says she could get arrested too. She says she’s okay with whatever happens next, as long as he pays. Sonny says he will. Anna has his word on it.

Tomorrow, Sonny and Anna come home, Jason is going to make a big step, and Dante wants to know what the hell is going on.

Little Women: LA

Jasmine and Terra are out for a walk and discussing working out. Jasmine asks Terra how she’s doing after the line-dancing incident. Terra says the Christy thing has blown up into epic proportions. They discuss how Briana can’t give a straight answer on whether she wants to still be friends with Terra or not. Jasmine says Briana is a proud person and it’s hard for her to admit when she’s wrong.

Terra asks how being the maid of honor is going for Jasmine. Jasmine says with Briana everything seems to be last minute. Terra tells Jasmine she should encourage Briana to invite her family, but Jasmine thinks enough is going on already.

Briana is meeting with Sue Wong for her dress fitting. I love the dress, but Elena thinks it doesn’t fit that great. She tells Briana it’s a lot, especially if she’s going to wear jewelry. She says she wants Briana to look sophisticated, not like a girl playing dress up.

They talk about the guest list. Briana knows she doesn’t want Terra or Tonya there, but she’s feeling badly about Christy, especially since she was in Christy’s wedding party. The last time they got together, it didn’t go well though, and she doesn’t want drama at her wedding.

Christy tells her mother she has no idea if she’s invited to the wedding. She hasn’t gotten an invite yet and really wants to go since she and Briana were once best friends. Christy thinks since she poured her heart out to Briana, this should make them square. Her mom suggests she just ask, but Christy doesn’t want to ask a question where “no” might be the answer.

Todd says Matt called him. He says they’ve moved past their differences and he understands where Christy is coming from. Matt wants to invite them and surprise Briana. Christy is nervous that Briana won’t know and I think it’s a really bad idea. Christy says what if she doesn’t want them there.

Tonya is seeing a specialist about a weak muscle in her eye that causes her to see double. She wants to get it corrected so she can get Lasik surgery. The specialist thinks it should be the other way around and she wants to get a third opinion. Two out of three.

Terra asks about Kerwin. Tonya says she knows he loves her, but she’s tired of hearing he’s scared to commit. She wants to tell him to either take the leap or move on. Terra wonders if Tonya could move on, but Tonya says the circus is about to close down.

Elena and Terra go shopping. Elena has been working on her Little Palette makeup line, so they’re checking out the store. Terra asks Elena if she’s having a C-section. Elena wants to deliver naturally and Terra asks if she’s insane. She thinks any OB whose had experience with little people is going to tell her to have a C-section.

It’s wedding day! Briana and Jasmine are getting their makeup done. Briana is waiting for her friend, Lisa, who’s going to walk her down the aisle. Jasmine asks if Briana invited her family, and Briana says no. Jasmine hopes she doesn’t regret it later.

Jasmine shows Briana her dress. It’s black and Briana gets a little weird. Jasmine says she thought she was picking up a red dress and thats’ what she was given, so she thought Briana had changed the color. Briana says she wanted black and red, so I wonder if the other girl ended up with a red dress. In her individual interview, Jasmine says Briana only has herself to blame for the mix-up, since everything is so last minute. I’ll assume she’s right, since I’m confused as to what Briana is even talking about.

Tonya video chats with Kerwin. She says their yo-yo relationship is insane and he has to make a decision. She asks if he’s planning on moving out there and having a future with her. He asks if she’s in love with him. She says yes, and asks if he broke up with the woman he was living with. He says that’s over and he’s ready to have a committed relationship with her. Tonya says it’s taken 20+ years for them to figure things out. Check.

Jasmine says hopefully that’s the worst thing that will happen. In excellent timing, Christy is at the door. Briana is wondering what’s next. Christy tells her that Matt called Todd and that’s why she’s there. Briana says it’s an interesting morning and obviously Matt is coming from a good place. Christy says it’s her day and Briana helped her on her wedding day when she was a hot mess, so she wants to give some of that back. Christy says she’ll see her when she walks down the aisle and goes to join the guests.

Jasmine asks if Briana’s okay with this. Briana says maybe Christy will see things her way and want her to be happy. Jasmine is concerned about all the social media surrounding Christy. She says Christy is a people pleaser and she’s not sure about Christy’s motives. She doesn’t want Christy going back and forth with Briana anymore.

Elena is shocked that Christy is there with her mom and Todd. She asks if Briana knows she’s there and Christy says Matt invited them. Elena wonders if Matt invited anyone else Briana didn’t want there and tells Christy she hopes that’s the end of the surprises for today.

Actually the black dress seems to have worked out well with the other two attendants. Christy says without her and Todd, the place would be a ghost town and she’s hoping not inviting Briana’s family doesn’t put a bigger wedge between them.

Everyone is gorgeous walking down the aisle. We flash back to different scenes with Matt and Briana, and also some of the conflicts with the girls regarding Matt. Briana says they’ve been through a lot, but they’re even stronger now — and pregnant. She says with their kids there, it feels complete. I’m loving Briana’s fascinator headpiece and Matt looks dapper in his fedora.

They come to that part about if anyone objects to this union and looks are shot all over the place. Frankly, I don’t think they even say that anymore. It wasn’t included in my wedding and that was 30 years ago. The only time I’ve ever even heard it is on TV. They do the traditional vows and then recite the ones they’ve written for themselves. It’s very sweet. The rings are exchanged, they become husband and wife, and kiss.

Elena says if Matt makes Briana happy, she should go for it despite what anyone else says, and it’s the happiest she’s seen her in a long time.

Tonya and Terra are having a spa day and all mention of the wedding is off limits. Tonya tells Terra about her conversation with Kerwin. Terra says until she sees him rolling up in a U-Haul, she’s not going to believe it. She wonders if they shouldn’t do a trial run first. Tonya says she doesn’t have time in her life for goofing around and she’s ready to settle down.

The newlyweds are introduced at the reception, and they have their first dance. Christy says while she’s had her doubts, they’re very cute together and she hopes it will work out. Applause, applause.

Christy asks Elena to go for a walk. She says she’s grateful that Matt called them. Elena asks about Christy’s injury and if she’s pressing charges. Christy doesn’t want to talk about it and then says how hard it was and that she thought she was going to die. I dunno about all this. They showed the scene again at the beginning of the show, and while it looked like maybe the glass grazed the top of Christy’s cowboy hat, no way did it hit her in the head.

Christy tells Elena she had a concussion and that her vision is just coming back now. She gets all upset and starts wailing about the press. Elena asks how they found out. Christy says she doesn’t know. In her individual interview, Elena says it sounds a little suspicious that the press just suddenly discovered Christy in the hospital. Elena tells her not to worry and take care of her health.

The cake is awesome! It has two blackbirds on top of it, and red flowers on black branches throughout the icing. Matt and Briana make a little speech thanking the guests. Cake is eaten.

When Christy leaves, the paparazzi is waiting. Christy is all no comment. She doesn’t want it to ruin the wedding and she talks to the producers about getting them out of there. She asks for no cameras

Next week, Matt & Briana honeymoon, we see a sonogram of the twins, a baby shower happens for Elena, Christy and Terra finally cross paths, and Jasmine wants to rip Matt’s face off. It doesn’t look promising for the marriage.

Terra’s Little Family

Penny is going to her 8 month check-up. She also needs to be approved for her MRI. The MRI will tell them if she needs shunt surgery. The doctor says she’s a little anemic, but otherwise in good health and okay for the MRI.

Terra brings pizza home for dinner. Joe has been looking at RVs. He says they need a vacation. He says the last few months have been stressful on their relationship and it’s time for them to get away. To San Bernadino Mountain. Without Penny.

Terra says it can be Penny’s first camping trip, but Joe wants it to be like when they first got together. Terra asks if she’s going to get some on the trip. Joe makes jokes and Terra play smacks him.

Terra meets Elena for dinner. She wants some advice. She wants to know how to make things more romantic. She says Joe thinks she has an ulterior motive and is cutting off the resources. Elena suggests a trip and Terra tells her about the camping weekend. Elena doesn’t think that’s romantically productive. She tells Terra to just handcuff him to the bed, have her way with him and be done with it.

Elena makes up some funny role playing scenes. Terra says she has tons of costumes. They toast to being creative.

Joe and Terra look for an RV. These things are huge. Joe tells Terra no way she’s driving since he wants to get there alive. Terra wants the more luxurious model, but Joe wants to go for the more manageable one. They test the pedal extenders on the RV Terra likes, but Joe thinks it doesn’t look safe. Terra ends up giving in and they take the smaller one.

Terra isn’t looking forward to leaving Penny. Grandma Olivia is going to take care of her. Terra says she’s going to call repeatedly and Olivia says she’s going to ignore it. Joe is with Olivia in that they don’t need to check in every five minutes. Terra has a hard time saying good-by, but they finally get out the door.

Since she has to leave Penny, Terra insists on driving. Joe says a prayer.

Terra asks if she’s going to get some tonight. Joe says he needs to be wooed and asks if she brought any lingerie. Terra wants to call Olivia already, but Joe isn’t sure if they have reception. Joe says he also doesn’t want to piss off Olivia since she scares him. Terra makes the call. Olivia tells them to enjoy themselves and not call again.

They get to the campsite and put out some chairs. Joe makes the guy next to them out to be a mass murderer who knows they can’t run fast. Terra wants to call home again, but Joe says it’s for her own good that he’s siding with Olivia. He says they hired her to have an important role in their lives for a reason. Terra says Joe has spent nights away from Pennny and she hasn’t. Joe tells her to relax. Terra says she’ll try.

Joe suggests they go fishing. The lake is beautiful and so is the weather. Joe says some of his best memories are fishing trips with his dad. The fish aren’t biting, so they decide to go kayaking. Terra is in front and Joe isn’t rowing even though he claims to be.

It’s quite a project for them to make the bed in the RV. Terra says she’s never been a fan of bed making. I tend to agree, since it’s a reach for me too. They make chili and hot dogs for dinner. Terra says it’s like date night. Terra calls Olivia again. Olivia tells her she needs to learn to relax and not to call again. She says she’s going to change the phone number. Joe tells Terra she worries so much. Terra says being away from Penny makes her realize how much she wants a big family.

Joe says because Penny is so cool, he wants more kids too. He’s ready to start trying. He wants Penny to have a brother or sister. Penny says Joe makes her happy and they exchange I love yous.

Terra says she has a surprise for Joe. Terra goes into the RV and comes out in a sexy bear outfit with a hunter outfit for Joe. Joe says he can work with it. He tells her let’s go make a cub and they retire to the RV.

Joe makes breakfast. Terra brings out a stool. She wants to get on top of Tucker (the name of their RV) and try to get better reception on her phone. She calls Olivia, but there’s no answer. She warned them. Joe tells her breakfast is ready. He says Olivia said she wasn’t going to answer the phone. Terra tries calling again and decides she wants to go. She’s been calling all morning long and there’s been no answer.

Terra says her nerves are shot and Joe agrees to leave. He says even one day is a victory. Baby steps.

Olivia asks why they’re back and Terra asks why she didn’t answer the phone. Terra says she was flipping out. Olivia says they trusted her and there was no reason for her to be stressed out. Terra says it has nothing to do with trust, but communication. Terra says they’d discussed the communication and doesn’t think a few phone calls a day is asking too much. Olivia says she’s hurting her feelings and being disrespectful. Olivia storms off and Joe says Terra should have approached it differently. He says Olivia is offended that they would think Penny wasn’t safe with her.

Terra feels like Joe isn’t taking her side. She says they’re supposed to be co-parenting and Joe says he wasn’t going to be the third person acting like a fool.

Next week, Joe is challenged by the physical aspect of parenting, another surgery might be on the horizon, and having a second child is rethought.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Jules is making breakfast. She has an old-fashioned peculator. I assume her husband usually makes the coffee since she says she doesn’t know how and it can’t possibly be the first cup they’ve ever had. Next, Jules gets the kids ready and Michael takes one to school. Jules walks the other to pre-school or daycare or wherever.

Bethenny has a big birthday coming up and is getting a piece of jewelry designed. Dorinda meets her at the designer’s studio. Bethenny says she’s having  tailgate chic party in the Hamptons. She has fire pits she wants to use and has built the party around them. I understand. I’ve built outfits around a pair of earrings.

They talk about John and in her individual interview, Bethenny says not everybody has to like everybody’s boyfriend. She wonders why Dorinda has to push John’s greatness on them and what they don’t know about him.

Carole shows up. She tells them about her lunch with Ramona. Dorinda thinks she’s a good person, but Bethenny says every time she let’s Ramona in, she gets burned. We find out that Dorinda uses Nair on John’s back. In graphic detail. Blerg.

Sonja and the Countess are hanging out at Sonja’s place. The Countess is ready to settle down and would like to get married again. Sonja says she and the Countess are in a different place, whereas Ramona is just starting to date. The Countess says she’s been seeing quite a bit of Bethenny and says Carole is up Bethenny’s “anus.” Oh, that’s right, Carole is dating the niece’s ex-boyfriend and the Countess doesn’t like that.

They move on to Dorinda for a second and then Sonja talks about saging her kitchen. I mean burning the spice, not cooking with it. Does that help you to cook better? Out, Guy Fieri demons! Out!

Dorinda visits Ramona. Ramona got the apartment in her settlement and she’s redecorated. She says you’d never know Mario was ever there. Snap. Dorinda talks about it being time for her daughter to move out and how she’d like some time to herself before having John move in.

They sit down to lunch. Dorinda is having a lingerie party. They talk about most women not knowing their correct bra size, which is true.

Carole meets Bethenny for dinner. Bethenny asks how it’s going with Adam. Carole says it’s been a year. Bethenny asks if they’re in love, but Carole says she doesn’t say that. She says Adam wants things like children. She says she has five good summers left while he has twenty. Not meaning she’s going to be dead, but she might be at another place in her life. Bethenny asks about Carole’s friendship with the Countess and if it’s irreparable. Carole says the Countess has been trashing her on social media and she should worry more about who she’s sleeping with and less about who Carole is sleeping with. Bethenny says she doesn’t know if the Countess is as in control as she thinks she is. She says she was out of control over the summer, meaning more than just partying. She says things always seem calculated and there are strings attached to everything. Carole says she’s never seen someone so completely clueless about who they are and she’s not interested in a friendship.

Dorinda goes to John’s cleaning establishment. She is wearing amazkingly humongous earrings that look like a piece of chain-mail. She’s getting some dry cleaning things done and says she’ll meet John after the lingerie party.

Bethenny and Ramona talk about the lingerie party. Ramona wonders if she should tell Dorinda about what John said behind her back. He was talking inappropriately about their sex life to some friends of Ramona’s. She isn’t sure how Dorinda would feel about it, but wants her to be aware of it. Bethenny talks again about how Dorinda pushes John on them.

Lots of nighttime NYC shots tonight. Dorinda goes to the space where they’re having the party. It’s a cute set up, with hors d’oevres and displays of the merchandise. It turns out Bethenny rented the same place for one of her birthday parties.

Jules touches some shrimp by accident and puts her hands in the ice bucket for purification because she’s kosher. Unfortunately, she doesn’t tell anyone, and they continue to use the same ice bucket for the drinks. Jules gets introduced to Carole. In her individual interview, Carole says Jules seems problematically thin, which is what Bethenny had said when they met.

Dorinda gives a bra speech. She says the bra experts can measure women just by looking at them and has the girls write down what they think their size is. It actually looks like fun. Dorinda says that the Countess said she’ll see her at Bethenny’s birthday party. Bethenny says the Countess is RSVPing and she hasn’t even been invited yet. Somehow Ramona makes it all about her with Carole and whines about how Carole didn’t call her over the summer when she was going through the divorce. Carole says she saw Ramona a bunch of times and even took her out to lunch when she had her book published.

Dorinda says something about not pretending and Bethenny takes this as a cue to tell Dorinda that she feels the need to sell John to them. She tells Dorinda about John pitching her business ideas and asking for her number when Dorinda wasn’t around. Dorinda says if he crossed a line, she’ll definitely put a stop to that. Dorinda says if Bethenny wants to believe she sells John, fine, but she chooses to have him in her life and too bad if anyone doesn’t like him.

Ramona chooses now to pipe up, since they’re “letting it all out.” (In her individual interview, Bethenny is saying, “Abort! Abort!” Ha-ha!) Ramona tells Dorinda about John telling her friends about sex with her, but Dorinda isn’t believing it. She says even if it’s true, she should talk to her on the side about it. Dorinda says she married someone, she buried someone, she pays her bills and she can do what she wants. She tells everyone to stop the bs, but Bethenny calls her on her bs. She says that Dorinda talks about not drinking over the summer when she practically had to be carried out of somewhere.

Dorinda gets a glass of wine and when she comes back, says she’s not staying with Ramona this weekend. Ramona says if nothing is wrong, why is Dorinda reacting this way. Dorinda says she wouldn’t bring up Ramona’s Mario problems in front of everyone.

Dorinda says she considered Ramona one of her best friends. Bethenny says Dorinda should be more mad at her. Dorinda says with Bethenny, it’s just her perception, but with Ramona, it’s a personal thing, since they’ve been friends a long time.

The bra experts suggest they get down to business and Dorinda steps outside.

Next week, the argument continues, John shows up to escalate things, the Countess looks at apartments, and Jules’s husband gets a load of what it’s like to be on reality TV.

April 6, 2016 — GH, Little LA, Little Family &Welcome Back NYC

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Alexis comes to Parker’s office. She says Parker has been ignoring her messages and she’s not leaving until they talk. She wants to know if Parker took advantage of Kristina.

Ava asks Julian if someone from the organization is after her. He tells her no, it’s Sonny.

Sonny tells Carly they have a lead on Carrrlos. She tells him to ignore it.

Nicholas says he doesn’t want a stranger under his roof. Curtis says they have proof he tried to shoot Hayden. I have news for Nicholas too, Curtis isn’t a stranger to his wife, so too bad.

Sam wonders why Nicholas let Hayden stay at Windemere after the shooting. She’s finding it hard to believe he’d have Hayden shot just to keep them in the dark about Jason. She says they always called him the “good Cassadine.” She doesn’t think it makes sense and it’s not the man she knew. Jason thinks he’s capable of anything.

Nicholas says he doesn’t have to put up with Hayden’s associates. Curtis says if she insists on playing house with him, he’s going to make sure she doesn’t die trying. Hayden tells Nicholas he doesn’t call the shots anymore. I love this.

Kristina tells Molly she told Alexis about Parker, but she didn’t exactly respond well. Kristina says Alexis told her she’s just confused and thinks Parker was influencing her and took advantage of the situation. Kristina say Alexis doesn’t want to believe she’s gay.

Parker tells Alexis she didn’t take advantage of Kristina. Alexis says she told her everything. Parker says if she included Parker seducing her, it isn’t true. Alexis says there’s a power discrepancy, but parker says she didn’t use that Alexis asks how Kristina would have come up with offering her sex for a better grade. Parker says the conversation is over. Alexis threatens to make a scene. Parker says she’s saying nothing else without a lawyer. Alexis says she is a lawyer and she’s not leaving without answers.

Alexis says she’s not a 20 year old student open to manipulation. Parker says she didn’t seduce Kristina and she’s not recruiting her for any gay agenda. She says Kristina needs her mother.

Kristina tells Molly she’s not the person Alexis wanted her to be. Molly says maybe what Alexis is worried about has nothing to do with her being gay or not. Kristina wonders what Sonny si going to do when he finds out.

Ava puts two and two together, realizing that the longer she’s scared, the longer Avery stays with Sonny. She says she’s going to get her daughter.

Sonny says he thought they were trying to avoid the escalation of violence and that bringing in Carrrlos and sending Julian to prison is the best thing they can do for their family. Carly is afraid Sonny is gong to get hurt.

Nicholas asks Curtis who he thinks he is. Curtis says someone who has proof that Nicholas had Hayden shot. He says he has enough to reopen the case and that Nicholas’s mother will get dragged into it too. He says if they retest the bullet and find out that it came from another gun, it will open a can of worms that will end with his ass on trial for conspiracy and attempted murder.

Sam says no way would Nicholas have had someone shot for Elizabeth and that he did it for his greedy self. Jason goes in the other room and Sam leaves.

Julian tells Ava that rushing to Sonny’s in the middle of the night isn’t the way to do it. He says Sonny might have sent her the black rose, but there’s still hostility with the organization. He says not to tempt fate by giving an ultimatum to Sonny. Ava says she should have known better and won’t make that mistake again.

Kristina says Sonny sees things in black and white, and to tell him she’s confused will make things worse. Molly says that if he finds out elsewhere, he’ll be angrier.

Julian wants to talk to Kristina. He says that Alexis told him about what’s going on. Kristina asks if Alexis admitted being disappointed in her and Julian says the only one she’s disappointed in is herself.

Alexis says Kristina knows she loves her unconditionally. Alexis says she’s only had boyfriends and wonders if she’s just using her sexuality as a defense. Parker says it’s possible, but Kristina is just a friend. She says Kristina’s perception got skewed. Alexis says she’s talking about not going back to school. Parker says she’s terrified of rejection and losing her family’s love. She needs to feel that the life she has with her family isn’t going to change. She looks up to Alexis and wants her mother. Parker tells Alexis to listen and pay attention. Alexis asks if Kristina said she didn’t. Parker says not in those words and tells Alexis about Max sniffing around. Parker says Kristina is second-guessing herself because an attraction to a woman might alienate her from her parents.

Carly tells Sonny to let Anna handle it and not put himself in the line of fire. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Ava.

Hayden tells Curtis to give Nicholas time alone to adjust and they’ll fix up a room for him. They go upstairs and Sam knocks on the door. Sam starts yelling at him about having Hayden shot and says she’s calling the cops and turning him in for attempted murder.

Julian tells Kristina to give Alexis a break. He says maybe her reaction had to do with her being worried about more than Kristina’s sexuality. He says Alexis would do anything for her kids.

Alexis tells Parker that she and Sonny don’t look at life thought the same lens. She says that Sonny’s son is gay and she helped them to get closer. Parker says she really didn’t influence Kristina, that they had a connection, but she’s married and Kristina is a student. Alexis says she didn’t handle things well and Parker tells her to get to know Kristina and to make sure she knows she’ll love her no matter what.

Ava tells Sonny she knows about him sending the black rose. She says Kiki is almost ready to come home, and when she does, she’s bringing Avery home too. She leaves. Sonny tells Carly they won this round.

Sam goes ballistic on Nicholas and asks him if he’s out of his mind. Nicholas struggles with her over the phone. Jason comes out and kicks Nicholas’s ass. Curtis tries to intervene, and Jason punches him too. Jason is about to choke Nicholas out and Sam tells him to let go. Hayden says she’ll have him arrested if they don’t get out and they leave. Hayden tries to helpNicholas. Curtis says he’s seen some bad dudes in his day, but Jason is lethal and out of control (just the way I like him). Hayden says he almost killed Nicholas and Curtis asks what she’d do then.

Sam wonders what the hell just happened. Jason notices the bruises on her arm. She says she doesn’t care about Nicholas, she cares about Jason and their family. He says he wanted to kill Nicholas. They kiss

Hayden says she doesn’t know what she would have done. Curtis says he’s there for her and tells her to protect herself when she isn’t with him.

Beat up Nicholas gets a drink. Hayden comes into his room and puts ice on his wounds. She’s obviously upset. She wets a cloth and wipes his face. They make googly eyes at each other.

Sam notices Jason is bleeding and he says it’s okay. Apparently it’s more than okay because they get nakey.

Julian asks Kristina to be more understanding. Kristina says she can’t exactly hold it against Alexis, since she’s not even sure herself. Julian says he got a text saying Alexis had to go out of town but she’ll be back in the morning.

Alexis thanks Parker for her understanding and putting up with her accusations. Parker says she hopes Kristina continues her studies and finds someone worthy of her love. Alexis leaves and Kristina calls Parker. Kristina says she took Parker’s advice and started telling people about how she feels. Parker says Alexis just left.

Carly tells Sonny Ava could take them to court for harassment. Sonny brings up Kiki and why she was shot and how Avery is safe. He hopes Ava takes it to court because she’ll be cutting her own throat. He heard that the Jerome organization is still angry and Ava isn’t out of the woods.

Ava gets ready for bed, then gets under the noisiest covers ever. She jumps back out and there’s a dead bird in the bed. I guess the organization’s budget is tight.

Hayden gets into bed with Nicholas. He takes a knife out of the nightstand drawer and puts it next to his pillow. Hayden does the same.

Sam and Jason get busy . Song part.

Tomorrow, Ava complains to Sonny about not protecting her, Jason asks Sam if she has any regrets, and Sonny asks Anna if she’s causing trouble or looking for it.

Little Women: LA

When we last left, we were in the middle of a bar fight between Christy and Terra. Christy leaves with Briana after hurling various insults at Terra, after they both hurled various drinks at each other. Outside the bar, Christy says she got hit in the head, but we need a flashback on that. I didn’t see anything except liquid hit anyone. Jasmine says when she planned the bachelorette party, she had no idea everything would lead to a fight of this magnitude.

Christy whines to Briana about not telling her she was pregnant. Briana says she didn’t tell anyone. She says that her announcement didn’t exactly go as planned. She also knew Christy would be the most difficult one to tell, since she’s been trying to get pregnant herself. They talk about Terra being out of control and Christy whines about her head again. Briana says Terra is toxic and they don’t need this. Christy cries some more about Briana being pregnant. She says she’s happy for Briana, but she wants a baby too. She says maybe she should give Matt a second chance and Briana says that would mean a lot to her.

The rest of the girls come out and Christy says she’s going home.

Tonya invites Terra and Elena over for a special project. She wants to help at the food bank. They talk about the other night being stressful. They go over what led to throwing stuff. Elena got a text from Briana that Christy went to the hospital with a concussion because she got hit with a glass. Seriously, this is highly doubtful.

Elena calls Christy and puts it on speaker. Christy says she threw a plastic cup, but Terra threw a glass. Tonya tells her if she needs anything to call. Elena says it sounds like Christy is really injured and thinks Terra should apologize. Terra thinks Christy should apologize first.

Briana booked a resort in Lake Arrowhead for the wedding. She and Matt go to check it out. Matt asks if Briana is inviting her family, but Briana is on the fence about it. She’s also on the fence about Christy and tells Matt about what happened at the bar, and how Christy wants to give Matt another chance. She says she’s still questioning whether Christy is a good friend or not. Matt thinks it’s interesting how he’s been accused of being violent.

Elena and Preston go to a doctor’s appointment. Elena is now 13½ weeks along. She gets a sonogram. The doctor finds the first baby’s heartbeat easily, but makes Elena nervous when it’s difficult to find the second. The babies are fine though. Not so much the weight Elena has gained so far.

Jasmine shows up for the look-see at Lake Arrowhead. Briana is disappointed in the venue because it’s not exactly little people friendly. The manager points out that if there’s no snow outside, there will be mud, and that’s the deciding factor for them to look elsewhere.

They all discuss Terra. Jasmine thinks she does care. Matt asks Jasmine if she would be friends with someone who disrespected her husband whenever they get the chance, and she says no.

Elena visits Jasmine. Jasmine gives her a maternity body pillow. They talk about Christy’s hospital visit going viral and Elena brings up a TMZ article on her phone. It says she has two brain contusions. Elena wonders if it wasn’t Christy who leaked the story. Jasmine says Terra wasn’t the only one fighting and that Christy participated too.

Christy says her headache won’t go away. Her mother asks what the doctors said, since she went to two. Christy claims she has lesions on her brain. She says she has to monitored closely for the next few days. Her mom says she shouldn’t have driven home and Christy says she doesn’t remember doing it. She describes the fight, but it’s not exactly how we saw it. Todd says she needs to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Christy says she was a victim of domestic violence and talks about it being traumatizing to be hit by another person. This is annoying me since she basically started the fight.

Briana and Elena go shopping for baby stuff. Briana tells Elena about the wedding venue not working out and how she’s stressing over it. She also tells Elena that Christy filed a police report against Terra. Briana says she’s still not sure about inviting Christy to the wedding and how she said she was having second thoughts about Matt. Elena thinks Christy is looking for attention and calls bs about the Matt thing. Briana isn’t thrilled with Terra’s insults.

Joe and Terra go out for lunch. Terra says life is chaos right now and she just wants to hang out with Joe. Joe asks about the bar incident and Terra tells him that Christy threw something at her and she threw it back. Joe tells her that they have way more to lose and she shouldn’t have thrown something at the biggest opportunist in the world. Terra says she’ll apologize and move on. Joe says if she presses charges, they’ll press them back, since Christy threw the first punch…er, ice tea. Joe says it’s not worth it. Terra agrees. Although he’s joking around, Joe seems pretty upset.

Tonya thinks the ladies need a new perspective, so she’s making them come with her to help at the food bank. She and Elena get there first and Terra is right behind. She’s getting a non-stop onslaught from the media. She’s telling everyone no comment, but says Christy is milking it for all it’s worth. She says she’s tried to call and text Christy, but there’s been no response. She thought Christy would be there today, but says that Christy has posted on social media that she’s back at the hospital. Tonya wants to drop it and clear their heads by helping the hungry.

Jasmine and Briana get there. As they’re filling carts with produce, they start talking about Christy. Briana isn’t okay with it though. The manager asks for three of them to come in the back. Jasmine, Briana and Terra go with him. Jasmine says the silence is deafening and asks how the two of them are doing. Briana says she’s not mad or holding on to anything. Terra says she was hurt by being ignored and it was hard for her to be excited about Briana’s announcement. Briana says she feels hesitant about moving forward. Terra says she can’t force anyone to have a friendship and says she’s giving up. In her interview, Briana seems miffed about that, but you can’t have it both ways.

Matt and Briana decide on a venue. Matt asks her which girls she’s going to invite. He doesn’t want Terra there, but it’s up to her. Briana says they talked and Terra was upset because Briana didn’t answer her texts. She says she doesn’t work at the same speed though. She says although she and Tonya are cordial, she and Terra are done, and she’s not inviting either one of them.

Briana talks about Christy, saying she might regret not having her there, but as it stands, she’s not inviting Christy either. She doesn’t want to bring the drama to the wedding, and she’s not putting the wedding on hold. Matt says he believes Christy does care about her.

Next week, Briana’s wedding outfit is completed, Terra asks Elena about a C-section, Christy shows up uninvited to the wedding, and so does the press.

Terra’s Little Family

Terra goes with Tracy to her doctor’s appointment. There’s a chance she might be having the baby today. Tracy gets emotional and calls her husband. The doctor comes back and says not today. Terra breathes a sigh of relief, especially since she has the shower planned for the next day.

Penny is almost 8 months and is going to start eating pureed food. Joe and Terra are putting together a high chair. Joe says real men don’t need directions, but ends up referring to them pretty quickly.

Terra asks for help in planning the shower. She asks Joe if he’ll be in charge of Penny and feed her for the next 24 hours, but he’s afraid. He says it’s more difficult for him to lift her, but Terra says she has faith in him.

Joe is feeding Penny and wishes they could just throw back some barbecue and wings. He tells Penny she’s the cutest thing in the world and that’s why Terra wants another one of her. She is pretty adorable.

Terra comes back with a pinata and some balloons. She says Tracy gave her a wonderful baby shower and she wants to do the same for her. Terra talks about having baby number two, but Tracy and Terra think she’s nuts since she still has an infant. Terra says she was a nanny to a five and two year old, but Tonya says it’s not the same when you’re carrying one inside you.

Joe is checking out a father/daughter music class with Penny. He tells Penny that they’re going to awaken her inner artist, but she’s still going to college because he doesn’t want her playing birthday parties in an Oompa Loompa suit. He gives her fatherly advice, including don’t get bad credit, don’t take a job where you wear nachos in your hat and don’t have sex with rappers or Charlie Sheen.

The shower is in full swing. They make clay images of what they think Tracy’s baby is going to look like, while eating some tasty-looking food.

Joe has doubts about the music class. They start off with some percussion instruments. Joe says so far the class isn’t very rock and roll. Penny tries to eat the drumsticks. Joe says he’s starting to see himself in Penny. He says it ended up being an amazing day. He talks to her while she sleeps, telling her there will be people who look at her as different, but she’ll also have good friends. I’m hoping by the time Penny gets older, the differences won’t matter so much.

Pinata time! Everyone is having a blast and Terra says she came, she saw, she showered. Joe and Penny arrive. Elena asks about a second baby and Tonya chimes in that Terra said they were working on baby number two. Joe is annoyed that Terra brought up something he considers private. He walks out and Terra follows him. She says they’re her best friends and she’s sorry, but she didn’t think she was doing anything wrong. He says he hates everyone knowing their business and they hadn’t agreed on it yet. Terra says all she said was they’re trying. He tells her to keep some things between them.

Terra doesn’t get why it’s a big deal. Joe storms off. In their interview, Joe says Terra always gives too much information. Terra calls Joe back, but he says no way.

Later, Terra approaches Joe about the argument. She admits she shouldn’t be sharing things before she checks with him. She says she loves him and she didn’t want to hurt the bond between them. Joe says he loves her too, and he’s sorry he got so angry.

Terra has recorded a children’s album called Penny’s Playlist and asks Joe if he’ll be involved in the videos. She wants him to wear a costume and drum. She says it’s a zebra outfit with a red mohawk and he’s less than enthused. She says they can negotiate.

Joe is going away for a gig in Arizona. He says he’ll be back in time for the video and we flash back to him being late for the wedding rehearsal for the same reason. He swears he’ll be there.

Terra goes to a production meeting. They’re doing four videos in one day, so they don’t want to waste any time. Terra says Penny has helped her to look at a more motherly side of music. Terra video-chats with Joe later and he’s been drinking. She tells him not to overdo it, since he has an early call for the video shoot. She shows him his costume.

Terra arrives with Penny at the video shoot. Tonya meets her there. Terra hasn’t heard from Joe yet and he’s late. She goes through a routine with Tonya. Terra tries calling Joe and it goes to voicemail. She changes the order of the videos so he doesn’t have to be on until later. She doesn’t know whether to be concerned or angry.

They start with Row, Row, Row Your Boat. Terra is rowing a boat and being a mermaid, and Tonya is a crab. When they finish, Joe still isn’t there. Terra is nervous because he usually answers his phone when he knows she has Penny. She wonders if something is wrong. She tells the director they’re moving forward without Joe and Tonya is stepping in.

Tonya doesn’t know the routine very well, but it’s pretty funny. The videos are really cute. They manage to get all four of them done, after which, Joe shows up. He says his phone died and Terra asks to see it. She says he smells of alcohol. She says what if something had gone wrong with Penny? He won’t give her the phone and she wrests it from him. It’s not dead and it’s on vibrate. She says they still have a half hour, so he can try to make it right.

Joe is wearing a pig in a tutu costume and dances to BINGO. He says it wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

Next week, Joe and Terra go on vacation without Penny, Terra gets no answer when she calls the house, and Joe thinks Terra is trying to get pregnant without telling him.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Thank you. The taglines for this one are much better. I’m glad to be back in the city again too.

Dorinda visits Bethenny’s new apartment, which is absolutely fabulous, with hallways and art and cool niches. There’s a walk-in closet with a safe for her jewelry that’s really like a giant jewelry box with felt-lined drawers that slide out. There’s a tiny balcony too. I sob, wondering what happened to my life.

They’re having a luncheon. Bethenny has started to date again and she wants to bring a guy named John. They talk about who they’re going to invite. They discuss new girl Jules and her short husband. Dorinda tells Bethenny not to mention his height, or rather lack thereof.

Carol is out shopping with Adam. Carol says it surprises her that they’ve been together over a year. Carol has a new puppy named Baby. We flash back to the Countess being nasty to Carol about her relationship with Adam. He’s going on a trip and they talk about missing each other.

Newly single Ramona says she’s heard NYC is the number one city to be single in, so lucky her. Where she heard this, I have no idea. Number one for men maybe. She goes out for drinks with some friends. Her daughter shows up with one of her friends. Avery is embarrassed by Ramona. The guys next to them buy them some champagne and Ramona acts stupid.

The Countess visits Sonja who’s invited her to spend some time at her place since they’re both empty nesters. The Countess is bearing a huge bouquet. Sonja tells her intern to fetch a bottle of tequila. And wine. The Countess tells her she has a date.

Sonja talks about a date for some event she went to. They discuss having their DNA done and it turns out the Countess has extra teeth like some Eskimos have. News to me. I won’t tell you what they talk about next.

Ramona meets Bethenny for lunch. Bethenny asks if Ramona has her dress, joking about a dress Ramona walked away with after doing Bethenny’s talk show. Bethenny says it’s hunting season now that Ramona is single. Bethenny says she’s seeing a bunch of different people, but it’s like eating at Olive Garden — nice, but she wants amazing.

Bethenny talks a bout a dinner Sonja and the Countess were at and how drunk they were. Ramona says she doesn’t want to go out drinking with Sonja any more because she goes overboard and gets frisky with men. Ramona says she’s gotten used to John and invited him and Dorinda to her house in the Hamptons. Bethenny says they party hard and Ramona thinks Dorinda is too classy for John. Bethenny says he’s shady and she keeps her distance. She thinks Dorinda is always trying to “sell” John because he gives a bad impression.

OMG. New girl, Jules, has an amazing place too. It’s a loft apartment in the Flatiron district. She has a live-in nanny and housekeeper, but still tries to be hands on. She’s Asian, her husband is Columbian and they have a blonde daughter, and she says she’s often mistaken for a nanny herself. Her way of parenting involves bribery. Whatever works.

John gives a homeless guy five bucks and pats himself on the back. He and Dorinda are out for their anniversary. He’s very handsy with her at the table, which she’s not into. Dorinda’s daughter is moving out and Dorinda is hesitant to have John move in. John wants some PDA, but that’s not Dorinda’s thing.

Bethenny goes to her new office. It’s very cool. Lots of brick. She talks to her employees about being edgy and figuring out how to make the brand fun again. She tells them they have free reign. She doesn’t care if they do crack as long as they get the job done.

Bethenny’s divorce still lags on. She has a $700 electric bill to pay from the old apartment that leech Jason Hoppy is squatting in.

Carol meets Ramona at a cute cafe. Ramona is excited about being single. She tells Carol about a party she went to and can’t pronounce reggae. She and Mario aren’t talking, but she’s glad he’s got a good relationship with their daughter. Ramona got properties and he got cash. Ramona talks about various things she’s been doing and Carol can barely get a word in. Carol asks if she talks that much on a date. Ramona thinks she and Carol should be more like each other. No. Ramona needs to shut up.

Dorinda and John meet Bethenny and John #2 for dinner. Dorinda thinks John #2 reminds her of Jason, but I disagree. They get a seafood tower that’s pretty impressive. Michael and Jules arrive. Jules says she’s a full time mom, which I agree is the hardest job on earth. Jules is Jewish and keeps a kosher home and they talk about that. Jules’s mother is Japanese and she says her husband married her because she was the least Jewish looking Jewish girl he’d ever seen.

Bethenny says with John, all roads lead to dry cleaning, which is his profession. Bethenny says she loves Dorinda, but the chubby baby she brought with her (meaning John) is another story. Bethenny talks a little about Dorinda’s drinking. In her interview, Bethenny talks about Dorinda being seriously wasted in the Hamptons. Dorinda makes a bunch of excuses about why she acts stupid when she’s drunk.

Bethenny tells Dorinda that Jules makes her think of a Virginia Slims ad. She thinks that Jules is unnaturally thin, which she knows is odd coming from her. Bethenny makes a joke referring to Jules’s husband being short. Oops.

Next week, the Countess complains about Carol stealing her friends, Bethenny talks about being burned by Ramona, and both Bethenny and Ramona confront Dorinda about John.