Tag Archives: The Walking Dead

Mar7

March 6, 2016 — The Underworld, the Undead, Cait & Two Wives

Posted on March 7, 2016 by theresakp

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

OMG — this has been one busy night for TV! Both Once Upon A Time and I Am Cait are back, The Walking Dead soldiers on intensely, and The Real Housewives of Atlanta and Potomac will never end.

Once Upon A Time

Emma opens her eyes and finds Neil in her car He says to think of it as a long distance call from a friend. They talk about their son. Emma tells him she’s on her way to the Underworld. Neil tells her it’s a bad idea and it won’t end the way she thinks it will. She asks Neil for help. but he says the Underworld is for people with unfinished business and that’s not him. He tells her to stop what she’s doing, but of course she’s not going to. He wishes her well and disappears.

Emma finds herself back on the boat going to the Underworld.

The passengers debark the boat. The Underworld looks like Storybrooke — if it had been hit by a tornado. Regina says they’re not in Maine anymore. I hadn’t known they were in Maine to begin with. Emma sees someone she knows. Gold/Rumpelstiltskin tells them people are trapped here because of unfinished business and likely some of them are there because of them. Regina says the sooner they get out, the better.

Evil Queen Regina is berating her subjects. It’s her birthday and she wants Snow White’s heart on a plate. A dude tells her he knows where Snow White is, but he wants something in return. She says she’ll return the favor by killing him quickly. Snow comes up behind her with a bow and arrow and tells her to knock it off. Regina says they’re lucky she’s in a good mood and disappears, poof! in a cloud of purple smoke.

Regina’s father tells her not to let her merciless mother, Cora, win and control her. Regina says she banished her mother to Wonderland, but he says as long as she’s on this quest, she’s being controlled.

Apparently Cora is in hell too, because the message is sent to her that Regina is there.

Snow/Mary goes in the Underworld diner. The waitress is excited to see her. Snow says she’s looking for someone and describes Hook. David enters the diner and kisses her. What up wit dat? It turns out he’s David’s brother. He says to let David know there’s a new sheriff in town. He leaves ad the others enter. Henry brings her a room key. I have no idea what just went on there.

Regina sees a guy whose been following them. She calls him out and he says someone wants to see them.

Evil Queen Regina just wants her birthday to be over. I love the costumes on this show and she always gets the best ones. Her father, Henry, asks the Magic Mirror to summon…her. The mirror says he doesn’t have a death wish, but the father insists. Henry sees Cora in the mirror. He tells her to tell Regina to let go over the feud. She says no way, and that they should help her. Cora appears in a full length mirror and Henry says he doesn’t need her help and leaves. She says Regina does and comes out of the mirror.

In the Underworld, Regina meets Cora. They hug. Cora says she has unfinished business, meaning Regina. She says she wants Regina to be happy. Regina asks for help finding Hook. Cora says Regina’s friends and family are holding her back, and she has to do what’s best for her. She’s arranged for a boat in an hour and wants Regina to leave with Henry.

Cora reminds Regina of her last words, that Regina would have been enough. She says sometimes a mother has to do whatever for her daughter even if it’s reprehensible. Regina asks if she’s threatening her. She says no, she has to show her something.

They’re at a cliff and the messenger dude is on the precipice of a cliff with flames leaping below. Cora throws him off into the flames. Cora tells Regina that the Underworld can be left in two ways, to better place of worse one. Cora gives her another option, go home or there will be a cost and someone will suffer — her father.

Gold goes to his Underworld shop. He thinks about how he told Belle he had to go to the Underwold because he’s the only one who’s been there before. She tells him to come back to her and he says he always does. He goes to a safe in the shop and Peter Pan comes in asking if he’s looking for something. Gold says just because Peter sired him, doesn’t make him his father. He says Gold won’t find anything Peter doesn’t want him to find, and gives him a potion. Peter wants to make nice because he wants to go back, but Gold tells him it’s not going to happen. Peter suggests swapping himself for one of the others going back. He gives Gold the potion as a gesture of good will.

Regina tells the others she can’t let her father suffer because of her. She says after she killed him, she thought he went to a better place, but no. They argue, but Gold interrupts with the potion. He says it will allow them to talk to the dead and if they pour it over Hook’s grave, he can tell them where he is. He says he’s leaving on the next boat and they’ll have to handle this themselves. Bye, Felicia!

Snow meets Regina’s father in the woods. He says if the feud continues Regina will lose her soul and the kingdom will be destroyed. Snow hears another voice, and turns. Henry rips her heart out from behind because he’s really Cora. The real Henry, who had called her name, is like, wth? and Cora says, come on, Regina needs her birthday present.

The group goes to the graveyard and uses the potion. Hook appears, but the vision of him is all shaky and he disappears again.

Emma says Hook is in pain and suffering, and they still don’t know where he is. She tells the others to take the boat home, but David says they’re staying to back her up. She tells Regina to them and herself out of there.

The Evil Queen continues to celebrate her birthday by killing a jester. I’ll bet they don’t last long in this kingdom. Cora arrives at her birthday party. Regina asks how she got out of Wonderland and where’s her father. Cora says she lost track of him and gives her Snow’s beating heart. Regina is able to see Snow in the Magic Mirror and crushes her heart. Snow starts to clutch at her chest and panic. Regina is delighted until Jiminy Cricket pops out of Snow’s bodice and Regina realizes it’s not the right heart. Cora says someone must have switched them.

It was Henry. Henry says if Regina crushes Snow’s heart, she’ll be dark forever just like her mother and just what her mother wants. Regina says Henry betrayed her. He says as long as Snow lives, she has a chance, so whatever she does to him is worth it. She makes him disappear, poof! in a puff of blue smoke, and puts him in the box that held the heart. It reminds me of I Dream of Jeanie.

At the Underworld graveyard, Regina visits her father’s grave. He appears and she apologizes. He forgives her and tells her it’s okay. He says he loves her no matter what because that’s what fathers do. She says she doesn’t understand how he can be so good. He says her mother is using him to get her to leave, but he wants her to stay. He’s happy that she finally put vengeance aside. Regina says Cora is going to send him somewhere worse, and she can’t let that happen. He says if she stays, she’ll spread hope and to let him see her doing the right thing. He disappears, poof! in cloud of grey and orange smoke.

Cora asks Regina where her father ran off to and she shows Cora the box. Cora says she’s impressed. Regina says Henry might have been wrong about the revenge, but right about Cora. She says she wants it to be her victory. The Magic Mirror pulls Cora in. Cora says without her, Regina will fail and be alone. Regina says being alone is fine with her and Cora grabs the box, taking it into the mirror with her.

Henry stands on the edge of the cliff. Regina tells Cora to stop. Regina says she’s going to help her friends and her father. Cora says to do what she says and not force her hand. Regina says she doesn’t have to do it and Cora makes the flames swallow Henry. Whoa, wait, the flames disappear, and an extension goes out from the cliff. A heavenly light shows from above and Henry says it’s where he belongs. His unfinished business was with Regina. He let Cora get in the way of their relationship, but now Regina is free of her. Regina introduces Henry to his grandson and namesake. He tells young Henry to take good care of Regina and tells Regina not to forget who she really is.

He leaves and goes into the light. That was all pretty touching. If I wasn’t typing, I might have shed a tear or two.

Regina and Henry join the others. Gold (hasn’t he left yet?) says that the people here are not the dearly departed, just wretched souls not worth helping. He says he’s not sticking around, because no one heard him the first time. Henry dubs their quest Operation Firebird. The clock in the fallen clock tower ticks and Regina smiles.

Cora isn’t gone. She goes inside a building and into an elevator. Ha-ha! Where does an elevator in the Underworld go? The Under Underworld? Cora goes into a cavern to a weird library where some dude is having a pedicure. Dude wants Regina gone. Each clock tick means a soul has left his domain. I guess he’s the devil? He says Regina is going to regret her decision. Cora says don’t threaten either one of them and she wants what he promised her.

He puts Cora in rags and says she’s a miller’s daughter again and to go tote bags of grain. Cora says he promised to save them and he says she promised not to fail and that’s something to think about for eternity. She takes a wheelbarrow full of sacks and goes. Dude’s hair turns into blue flames.

Next week, Hercules joins the cast and they fight Cerberus, the three-headed dog. I can’t wait!

The Walking Dead

Carol (where’s she been?) is in the pantry picking out ingredients. Carol is in the woods, offing a zombie. Carol is getting dressed in her mom sweater. Carol is taking roasted chestnuts out of the oven and baking cookies. Carol is passing out cookies to the neighbors. Is this a day in the life of Carol?

Carol brings Tobin some cookies. He says they’re pink, and she says beets make them sweet. He says they’re the best beet and acorn cookies he’s ever tasted. I don’t totally trust Carol and wonder if she’s flirting with him or going to poison him.

Rick is back and wants everyone to meet at the church. He tells Carol they’re going to have to fight. He drives off and Carol ponders her remaining cookie container.

Morgan sees Carol and says it’s been a while since they talked. He wonders why she didn’t tell Rick. He says she didn’t want to tell anyone because it’s kind of like she did it too. She says it’s not that way and I have no clue what they’re talking about.

Rick says Maggie hammered out a deal with Hilltop for food and supplies. He says they’re not giving it away though. He tells them about the Saviors and that the Saviors would have found them eventually. He says If they were low on food, it would be the end of them. He says if they fight the Saviors for Hilltop, they can keep Alexandria. He asks if anyone has anything to say. Morgan asks if he’s sure they can beat the Saviors.

Morgan wants to give the Saviors a choice of compromise. Rick says if they talk to them first, they’re sunk. Morgan says life means possibilities. Rick thinks it would be a mistake, and asks who else feels that way. That would be nobody, so Rick says they’ll kill them all. He says not everybody has to be involved, but if they stay behind, they have to accept it.

Carol can’t sleep. She writes some weird stuff in a journal. The number 18 is significant. Carol looks like she has a headache.

Maggie tells Glenn about the deal. She says she has to go with them.

Carol is out having a smoke. She sees Tobin on the steps of his house. They sit together. Tobin says he’s worried about her going to fight the Saviors. He says she can do things that terrify him. She asks how. He says she’s a mom. It’s not the cookies and smiles, but it’s the hard scary stuff that takes strength that makes her a mom to people there. Amen, dude. She’s definitely like a scary mom. She asks if she’s a mom to him, but he says no, she’s something else and kisses her. Lots of nookie this season.

Abe is packing. He tells Rosita he’s leaving after the raid. She asks why and he says it’s just the way shit is. She says he’s not leaving unless he can tell her why. He says she’s not the last woman on earth and she starts to cry. He leaves. Eugene comes by and offers her a cookie, but she slams the door in his face. Poor Eugene. He’s just trying to help.

Andy says he’s been inside the Savior camp. He’s makes a map and explains where things are.

Tara tells Denise she loves her. She’s going with the others and asks if Denise wants to come. Denise says she’s needed in Alexandria, even though she wants to go. She says she’ll tell Tara when she comes back. They kiss and hug.

Andy goes over the layout. Rick and company plan the raid. Rick says they’re going to let them walk in. He says they want Gregory’s head and they’re going to give it to them.

A caravan, headed by the Winnebago, heads toward the Savior camp. They get out. It’s on foot from there. Rick asks Father Gabriel why he still wears his minister duds. Gabriel says that’s who he still is, he thinks, and they also can’t see him in the dark.

Rosita bitches to Carol about Morgan, but says she won’t tell anyone. Dammit, what?

Cool zombies in the woods, like with half-arms and stuff. Glenn and Heath kill them. Heath says he’s been lucky, he hasn’t had to kill any of the living before. Glenn says he’s been lucky too. Glenn asks if Heath has ever seen something he can’t unsee. Heath says yeah. I think all of us have, Glenn. Glenn says him too, but killing someone has to be worse than that and he’s nervous.

Rick tells the group they’re going to scout the place and if everything looks good, they’re going in a few hours before dawn when the guards are tired and everyone is sleeping. If it doesn’t look good, they go back and make a new plan. They roll out at midnight.

Carol asks why Maggie is there. Rick says it’s her choice. Carol says she shouldn’t be there and Rick says okay.

Apparently Jesus had a job with a special effects department. He’s worked with the heads of the zombies that were killed to make them look like Gregory. He gives Rick three to chose from.Andy says the Saviors are scary, but and Negan has nothing on Rick.

Commercial break. Fear 462 gets their first real zombie. Doesn’t everyone know to shoot one in the head though? Oooh! I can’t wait for The Purge: Election Year. I thought the first Purge movie was a little ridiculous, but I loved The Purge: Anarchy.

Andy drives to the Hilltop gate and says it’s done. Someone calls from inside to bring it in. Two guards come out and he pulls a fake Gregory head out of a bag. His hand is bandaged and he says he broke his hand on Gregory’s nose to cover why the head doesn’t look perfect. After the head is thoroughly examined, it passes inspection. The guard says he can take his guy home and he can bring them more stuff next week.

When the guard goes inside, Daryl slashes the other one’s throat. The others hide the body. The guard comes out with the other Hilltopper and he gets killed. The guard, I mean. Rick and company go inside. Rick tells them to find the arsenal and they spread out a little.

Rick sees a sleeping guy and kills him. Glenn and Heath go into a room where a couple of other guys are sleeping. Glenn kills one and freaks a little. Heath hesitates with the second and Glenn takes over. I have the feeling Heath shouldn’t have come on this trip. Glenn sees a bulletin board with Polaroids of dead zombies, which is an oxymoron.

Tara asks if Gabriel is still a priest. He says he is. She says she lied to her girlfriend this morning. Denise caught her covering something up, so Sara said “I love you.” She says she told Denise that she’d done something like this before. I’m not sure if she’s talking about the raid or a same sex relationship. Gabriel asks if she loves Denise and she says yes. He says she knows what she’s fighting for then.

Sasha and Abe try to kill a guy, but he sounds an alarm.

Maggie starts to run toward the camp and Carol stops her saying she should be somewhere else. Maggie says they need their help. Carol says Maggie is staying there. Yeah, better listen to Carol She can be tough in the discipline department.

Sasha tells Jesus to get his people back to Hilltop. He says Rick needs his help, so no.

Inside, chaos is ensuing. Lots of shooting and stabbing and running. I know we’re bound to lose someone. Heath? He and Glenn throw themselves into a room. A room that happens to be the arsenal. They shoot through the door at the people who were chasing them, then cautiously open it. All dead. Except one and Jesus shoots him from behind before he can shoot.

Gabriel sees one of the guys in the woods. He tells him to drop his gun. The guy says Gabriel is just as dead as he is, along with some other cheerful tidings. Gabriel gives him some Bible verses and shoots him, saying “amen.”

Rick and the gang move outside. Heath leaves in the Winnebago.

Back in Alexandria, Morgan is doing some welding.

The rest of the group is getting ready to wrap things up. Michonne wonders which one was Negan. Suddenly, a guy comes hurtling out on a motorcycle. Oops, missed a spot. Daryl knocks him off the bike. They hear a loudspeaker with a female voice telling them to lower their weapons. Oops, missed a lot of spots. Rick says come out and let’s talk. The voice says they’re not coming out, but they will talk. They have Carol and Maggie.

Next week, a deal is struck.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Kandi, who feels about to pop, is seeing Dr. Jackie (from Married to Medicine — reality crossover!) and has a sonogram. All is well. Jackie tells her she’s been a fantastic pregnant woman. She talks about how they can still have sex and even I’m embarrassed because Mama Joyce is in the room. Next, she asks about names. Kandi likes Ace Wells Tucker. Jackie likes it and so do I. Jackie asks Todd if he has a push gift. Mama Joyce says if Kandi doesn’t like it, she’ll take it. Apparently she and Todd are getting along a lot better these days.

Kim leaves the kids with a sitter to go out on the deck and work. She’s having a video conference with her collaborator, Art, who sounds like he does what an agent does plus more. They discuss various projects and she shelves the one with Kenya. Kim says they’re like oil and water and just can’t work together, even though she had a lot of positive things to say about her project. Kim says she takes her work and reputation seriously.

Phaedra sets a beautiful table Her divorce attorney comes by and they have a drink. The divorce has been filed. The lawyer explains about how Apollo will have to be served in prison. They discuss the boys visiting. Phaedra says she doesn’t want her sons to be exposed to the grittiness of the prison and the attorney says Fort Dix is the best possible scenario as prisons go. She asks what Phaedra is going to tell them. Phaedra says very little, because if for some reason they can’t get in to visit, she doesn’t want them to be confused or bummed out. She says the attorney is like a second mom to her.

Kenya and Matt are meeting Aunt Lori at Kenya’s new house, which is coming along beautifully. Kenya says Matt wants a parking spot at the house, but he needs to put a ring on it first. She introduces him to her aunt, and gives her a tour. Kenya had to fire people along the way, and Lori tells Matt to be careful he doesn’t get fired, but he says he’s expecting a promotion. Go, Matt!

When Lori is alone with Kenya, she asks how it’s going with Matt. Kenya says she’s approaching things differently than in the past, taking it a step at a time. Lori says Kenya hasn’t said much about Matt, and she knows Kenya usually dates rich guys. Kenya says her only concern is the age difference. It sounds like Matt is a good guy and understands Kenya. She says she’s scared he’s the right one. Lori says it’s always a crap shoot with love.

Even though Porsha is a fool, she does have cute dogs. Dogs are the great leveler in this world. No matter how much money you have, they still poop on the floor. Her sister comes by and asks how the Jamaica trip was. She says Oliver surprised her and it went well. Lauren says they need to do a photo shoot for her new “Naked Lingerie” line. Porsha’s “Naked Hair” line has taken off, so she’s expanding. They go over the labels for the clothing and phone the creative director about the shoot. Porsha struggles with words that have more than one syllable and the director tells her she has the brains of a paper cup. I concur. (That means I agree, Porsha.)

Cynthia goes to Kim’s office where Kim is going over the commercial they shot in Jamaica. It’s pretty cute and Cynthia is happy. Cynthia feels badly about the Kenya nonsense. She talks to Kim about what was said about Kim’s husband and Kim says the both of them just laughed it off.

Phaedra visits Kandi bearing a gift. She says their relationship has changed, but they always make it work in the end. Kandi says she’s feeling uncomfortable and ready to have the baby. This is Phaedra’s cue to present Kandi with the gift of nipple conditioner.

They talk about the trip to Jamaica and Phaedra says Nene was there. Kandi is a little surprised since usually Nene wants to distance herself. She tells Kandi about how Cynthia said she and Kenya weren’t such great friends and that Sheree and Nene seemed to have mended fences. Kandi says she wouldn’t be so quick to get back into the friendship if she was Sheree. Kandi asks about the kids in regard to Apollo. Phaedra says Aidan understands somewhat. They talk about the boys a little.

It’s time for the lingerie photo shoot. Cynthia is also going to model. Cynthia says she and Porsha’s friendship is a work in progress. They do hair and make-up, and the pictures begin. I have to admit, this is some nice stuff. They spend so much time getting ready, they lose the light outside, so the operation is moved indoors.

Phaedra and the boys fly to Philadelphia and her mom meets them there. She hasn’t told the boys that they’re there to visit Apollo, just in case they can’t get in. She tells her mother that she’ll tell them when they get to the facility. Her mother says they’ll have to think about how to handle things after they see him. Phaedra doesn’t want them to be traumatized when they have to leave.

Matt and Kenya go out for dinner. She says that usually, a guy Matt’s age is a “drive by” for her, but after Jamaica, she thinks he could be what she’s been looking for. She says even though her clock is ticking, she doesn’t want to pressure him, but wants to know that they’re on the same page. She asks Matt if he’s still a party boy or is he ready to settle down. They make cute banter and the food comes. She asks if he wants children and he says within the next year or so. She admits to not being a spring chicken and thinking about freezing eggs already. When the dessert fondue comes, they get cuddly on one side of the table together.

Phaedra tells the boys they’re going on a surprise visit. I can’t stand Phaedra and think Apollo is a lowlife, but these kids are way cute. She says they haven’t seen Apollo in a year and Dylan might not have much recollection of him, having still been in diapers when Apollo went to prison. Apollo must have done all right as a dad though, because we flash back and they obviously love him. Phaedra is concerned what will happen when they see their father. We flash back to everyone’s opinion on the visitation, but Phaedra says hers is the only opinion that counts because they’re not walking in her shoes. As much as I hate saying it, she’s got a point.

In the car, the kids are adorable again. Phaedra says she’s getting more nervous as the time gets closer. Cameras aren’t allowed inside Fort Dix, so we don’t see the visit.

They go straight to the airport afterward. Phaedra says that Apollo was happy to see them, but the boys got antsy because they’re little and have no attention span. She says it was a lot and she’s not sure about a second visit. Phaedra is glad it’s over with. She says when she brought up the divorce, Apollo was against it, but she’s ready to move on.

Next week — the finale — Cynthia gives Peter a massage (my eyes!), Porsha is late (wink, wink), and it’s Christmastime with Kenya playing The Grinch.

I Am Cait

Yay! Cait is back!

Jenny and the gang come by Cait’s house. The girls are taking a road trip. Cait wants to find out more about other transgenders and immerse herself in trans issues. Kendall and Kylie are there and Cait talks about how difficult it was to tell them she was transitioning. Kendall and/or Kylie says they come from a very open-minded family.

They discuss at what point in time they each discovered when they knew what gender they were. They talk about how difficult it is with being called “dad” in a public place. When Cait’s daughters leave, she says she’ll call them from the road.

Candis says there’s been backlash about Cait in the transgender community and Cait needs a reality check. Cait talks about being the only conservative on the bus during an election year, and how it should be interesting. Probably not the word I’d use.

After picking up more people, they’re off to the Grand Canyon. Lots of banter and jokes and suitcases on the bus. It’s a pretty amazing bus. Not quite like the bus in Spiceworld, but it’s definitely glam. At lunchtime, Cait suggests the stop somewhere in the middle of nowhere and take over a restaurant.

Well, it’s not very crowded. I think they might be the only ones there. So much for a Priscilla, Queen of the Desert moment. There is some comedy though when Shandie gets locked behind on the bus until someone comes to her rescue. The lunch is uneventful and drinks are poured on the bus. Jenny says the trip is about more than having fun, and some of Cait’s hardest work is ahead.

Jenny broaches the subject of Cait saying she thinks of herself as heterosexual. She asks if when Cait was a man, if she thought about men as romantic partners. Jenny says her view changed after she transitioned. Cait says no, she hadn’t ever thought about them that way. Shandie asks if Cait dated women, if she’d consider herself a lesbian. Cait says she can’t see herself dating a woman in the future. She says she’s been there, done that, and has three ex-wives. Jenny says now she can have an ex-husband. Ha-ha! Cait says she doesn’t think women would be attracted to her and the girls beg to differ. They talk about attraction and how it differs with people.

They get to the hotel. Cait says now that she’s said what everyone wants to hear, that she’d date a man, maybe they’ll leave her alone for a while. Fat chance. Welcome to the world of women, where no one can let anything go. Some of the girls go out for a meal and discuss Cait’s openness on the bus. Jenny says that Cait often avoids certain topics, but she can’t run away from them now.

Candis and Cait talk about going on a double date. Cait asks if they’re affair would be over then, referring to the tabloid stories that always have them dating one another.

On the bus, Jenny reads an article about a win in a transgender issue case. At lunch, one of the girls — the youngest, at 18 — talks about going to college, and the rest of the women discuss their experiences as transgenders in school. Jenny says a lot of life experiences depend on the community they live in.

Candis suggests talking to Hilary Clinton. Cait says she’s open to hearing both sides and if Hilary becomes President, they’ll need her on their side. Although Cait says Hilary isn’t on anybody’s side but her own. The ladies disagree and ask which Republican candidate would be on the side of transgender issues. Cait says all of them and they scoff at that.

Cait is out and about meeting people. The ladies go to a gift shop and look at the tchotchkes with names on them. I understand when they get excited to see their names. I rarely see anything that has Theresa with an “h’ in it.

They take a helicopter ride over the Grand Canyon. It’s amazing. I saw it from an airplane window once and that was pretty cool too. They go out for dinner. Lots of eating on this trip. I’m in. They discuss when they used to wear women’s clothing as males. Cait talks about going out once, dressed as a woman, and being mistaken for a transgender by a “chaser.” It’s discussed how men who really love a transgender should step up and show that it’s not just a fetish. Cait says everything is complicated by the media for her. More boyfriend talk.

Jenny says in Houston an ordinance protecting the LGBT community has been repealed. I think she spends most of her life on her iPad, checking news items. The tagline for the opposing viewpoint was “No men in women’s bathrooms.” Jenny says the religious right and conservatives are fear-mongering, and it only takes one group to say something like, transgenders are also molesters, and it creates fear.

Jenny asks how Cait feels as a conservative. She says she thinks it’s the way being a transgender is presented to the public. Jenny says it was the Republicans, which begins a debate. Cait says people keep pressuring her to suddenly become a liberal, but her views aren’t going to change. She doesn’t think it’s a question of being conservative or liberal. I agree, there are a-holes in every group and I think most politicians are out for themselves instead of serving the people. And that’s as political as you’ll ever see me get in public. I do agree with Cait though, that it’s unfair to pressure her into thinking in a way she doesn’t think just because she transitioned. I mean, isn’t part of being accepted showing that a particular segment of people is just the same as everyone else?

Cait says Republicans believe in the Constitution which supports equal rights. One of the ladies talks about an ad that perpetuates fear. Candis says there’s never been a Republican who’s stuck their neck out for transgender issues. Cait says the economy is a bigger issue. Cait says she doesn’t think they’re out to get transgenders. Jenny says being a woman is more than hair and make-up. Cait says that conservatives look at it differently and feel the economic issues are more important and if that mess isn’t taken care of, the rest of it won’t matter. Candis worries that if Cait doesn’t change her viewpoint, she’ll find herself ostracized.

Cait says the economy is going to collapse. Zachary says advocating for her trans brothers and sisters is the most important, and she sees the Democrats promoting their issues. Cait says again that they don’t realize how free programs could contribute to an economic downfall.

This season, some of the LGBT community protest Cait; Kris makes an appearance; the girls try on wedding dresses; Kim helps Cait with a new DMV photo; and Cait meets Hilary.

The Real Housewives of Potomac

Please tell me this is the finale. No? Oh, come on.

Katie, Ashley, Robyn and Gizelle meet for lunch. Katie is going to ask them about the being involved with Rost Foundation. They talk about Ashley’s husband wanting to go swimming off the yacht. Ashley says she feels like everyone is just waiting for her to mess up. Well, yeah.

Katie talks about casino night. Katie wants to raise 100K in three weeks and doesn’t even have a venue yet, but she seems to think she can handle it. She says she hasn’t had an event that’s failed yet. Robyn is like if it doesn’t work out, it’s not on us. Katie says if they don’t want to be on the host committee, they don’t have to be and basically fires them ten seconds after hiring them.

Ashley is hosting a weekend at her beach house. She says she feels like she’s the freshman in the group. Her friend tells her to teach them how it’s done.

Katie tells Andrew about the lunch. She says everyone’s egos are too inflated to be supportive. She’s not exactly in the mood for a beach holiday with them, but she’s sucking it up because she likes Ashley.

Karen’s husband wonders if she has bricks in her suitcase and I understand. My father used to ask that about my purse.

Ashley frets about being one of the group. Since Karen is helping her, she’s offered to be her driver. They go in a two-seater, along with Ashley’s dog. Despite their issues, the rest of the girls go with Katie, whose car actually looks like a normal car. Karen asks if Ashley is nervous. Ashley says she wants to be a part of the group and feels like an outsider. Karen says she and her husband built their own life and she once felt that way. She says as Black women, they should embrace each other. The other girls play “Marry, Shag, Kill,” which I think is the stupidest game in the world.

Ashley tells Karen her room plan. Karen gives it the thumbs up. The other girls talk about Katie’s dating life, including Russell Simmons. Katie once blogged about catching him cheating. Gizelle is all tsk-tsk, but in her individual interview, Katie says she’s a fine one to talk, since her husband is all over the blogs. No blogs that I read.

Three hours later — an hour longer than I like to be in a car — they arrive at Ashley’s beach house, which is of course incredible. Ashley has hired a chef and breaks out the drinks. The girls think the cocktails are too sweet and ~~demand~~ ask for champagne. They talk about Ashley’s sex life and I go ♫ LA-LA-LA! ♫ For whatever reason, Ashley says she can tell the women don’t like the food. I have the feeling they probably don’t like much of anything they don’t control themselves.

Ashley shows them their rooms. She says she assigned rooms according to friendships. Robyn finds it all hysterical that she’s staying with Gizelle. It’s obviously a kid’s room and Gizelle is offended. Some girl who I don’t know is rooming with Charrisse, whose name was spelled wrong on the little cards Ashley made, so she claims that’s not her bed.

Gizelle starts Googling hotels and says you don’t put a grown woman in a kiddie bed. It’s a twin bed. Robyn thinks they should get a grip. Gizelle says if Karen had her room, she’d be losing her wig. All the hotels are filled, and Ashley is made to feel like a lowlife. What a bunch of jerks these women are. Is it the finale yet?

Commercial break. Yay! The Shahs of Sunset is back April 10. It’s one of my favorites.

It’s breakfast time and everyone is pitching in except Gizelle. Robyn says she didn’t hear the end of it all night. Worst. Guest. Ever. Ashley says they’re going surfing and those who don’t want to have the option of lounging on the beach. Ashley cops to the fact that had she been up front about the accommodations, some of them might not have come. Charrisse admits that she almost left, but she’s going to stick it out. Oh, gee, congratulations. What I wouldn’t give for a few days at Ashley’s beach house. Even rooming with whoever that extra woman is.

Gizelle says there are sharks in the water, so surfing is dangerous, but I think it’s more a hair and make-up issue. Karen and Charrisse sit it out with her. The girls go out on the water and Ashley’s tattoo is discussed. Ashley thinks everyone is having a good time. Karen thinks there should have been a safer option like a boating expedition. I think Ashley is a real pita, but she’s fun. I’d definitely hang out with her, especially if she’s buying.

Katie tells Charrisse about her lunch and how the girls weren’t supportive of her endeavors. They’re out at the market buying crabs for the grill. In the meantime, Robyn is preparing the grill and Ashley has sweated through her dress because she’s not wearing underwear. This is the most TMI episode ever. The crabs get grilled. Ashley starts to discuss bathroom habits and I agree with Karen that this should be a conversation for another time, not while we’re eating.

Charrisse is all kumbaya and suggests they go around the table, saying something good about one of the others. Gizelle says something about Katie being brilliant, which Katie takes as Gizelle saying she’s stupid, and I’m totally lost on that. In her individual interview though, Gizelle does say that she thinks something is wrong with Katie. Please, is this show over yet?

Still in the throes of bonding, after going inside, Charrisse suggests they say whatever is on their hearts. Gizelle talks about a tea that makes you go to the bathroom and we’re back at that conversation. Robyn asks Charrisse how she’s feeling about divorce. Charrisse tears up and says material things don’t matter. Gizelle says they don’t matter to her either and I wonder if I’ve changed channels.

Karen talks about her mother having early dementia and says she’d give up everything to change that. Okay, that one I would believe. Robyn starts to talk about how a best friend stole money from her and her husband, and starts to cry.

Next week, hopefully we finish that thought; Katie’s behavior at Ashley’s birthday party is discussed (again); Gizelle says Karen is doing well with Ashley, but by the end of the day Karen is done.

Whew!

Feb29

February 28, 2016 — The Dead & Nothing But the Dead

Posted on February 29, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

The only show with enough guts to air a new episode opposite The Who-Cares-What-Number-It-Is Academy Awards. AMC’s Walking Dead, we salute you!

The Walking Dead

Abe is telling camel stories to Sasha, while they check out the perimeter of Alexandria. They talk about Maggie having a baby. I’m thinking maybe Abe wants to have one with Sasha. When he says he’ll see her tomorrow, she says she’s taking a new shift. She says Eugene wants to help more, so he’s going to be walking with Abe. He changes it to see you around.

Abe is in bed with Rosita. I’m confused. Was he dreaming or was that a memory? Rosita tosses him a necklace that she made for him. He tells her she’s damn near perfection. Why not total perfection? Something in the necklace makes him think of giving the victory sign to Sasha.

Maggie and Glenn are doing something with the garden. Someone is sneaking around and they follow.

Paul is in Rick’s house and Carl draws a gun on him. Paul (introducing himself as Jesus, so I guess we’ll go with that now) says he’s waiting for Carl And Michonne. Two seconds later, everyone is there for a meeting. Jesus gives them a scorecard of Alexandria and what they’ve got going on as far as supplies and other assets. He says they got off to a bad start, but they’re on the same side. He says he’s from a place like Alexandria and he scouts for others. He admits he misjudged them, thinking they weren’t good people and he wants to make amends now. He talks about the settlement where he’s from, Hilltop, and says they’ve started breeding livestock.

Maggie asks if they’ve thrown in with other groups, and Jesus says their world is about to get a whole lot bigger. Cool! I’m excited to see new people.

Rick and the gang are going with Jesus to Hilltop. Denise gives Daryl an oatcake for the road. Carl wonders what’s up with Rick and Michonne. Rick says he was going to tell him, but it just happened. Carl says it’s cool. Carl is staying behind this time and says he’ll keep an eye on Baby Judith.

Abe asks Glenn something about Bisquick and pancakes. What he’s really asking about is Maggie’s pregnancy. Abe tells Glenn that if he sees rain coming, he wears galoshes. Can’t this guy speak English? Dr. Phil would probably understand him.

Rick sees a crashed RV. It’s some of Jesus’s group. There’s blood everywhere and the crash victims have turned into zombies. At first, Rick thinks Jesus set them up, but Jesus says they don’t have many fighters in their group and whoever else was in the RV is in trouble. Rick says he’ll look for them, but Jesus is staying behind with Maggie, who has orders to shoot him if he gets weird.

Rick and company go into a totally dark building where you can hear zombies lurking about. They tell the live people to hang tight. Abe nearly kills one of them because it’s really hard to tells who’s who in the dark.

Back in the RV, one of the rescued guys introduces himself as Harlan. It turns out he’s an obstetrician, which is good news for Maggie and Glenn. Jesus’s friend Freddy, the guy Abe almost killed, is still freaked out. His wife had been killed and she came back as a zombie.

Uh-oh, the RV is stuck in the mud. Jesus is like, it’s okay, we’re close enough. They get out and see the compound on the hilltop. Apparently, they’re not too original with names.

Jesus tells the lookout to open the gates. The lookout says to drop the weapons, but Jesus tells him the group saved them and he trusts them. He asks Rick to trust his group in return. Lookout guy opens the gates.

Harlan says see you on the flipside and takes Freddy for a look-see. Ha-ha! Jesus says a lot of people came from a FEMA camp. I’ll bet that was scarier than the zombie apocalypse. At the center of the settlement is a Colonial mansion. Jesus says it was a historical site that kids visited on field trips back in the day. It’s some house.

Ha-ha! again. When they go inside, a guy comes out and says “Jesus, you’re back,” a sentence you could take more then one way. His name is Gregory and he says he’s the boss. He suggests Rick and friends tidy up and they’ll meet after.

Abe asks Daryl how long Rick and Michonne have been together (5 minutes?) and if he’s thought of settling down.

Rick sends Maggie to Gregory’s office to negotiate. Gregory says he had visited the place when it was a museum and little did he know one day it would be his. Well, sort of. He thanks her for saving the doctor. She asks how they’ve survived at Hilltop. He says they’re good at it and they don’t sweat the details. They talk about gardens and Maggie brings up a trade. Gregory says he’s happy to help, but he can’t give things away for free. He says they can work there for their share.

Um…I think he’s making a pass at her. Yes he is. Maggie tells him to knock it off. She says hilltop is low on medication and their communities can help each other.

Jesus tells Rick and Daryl that Gregory is going to want the best deal possible. Rick says they need food and they didn’t come all this way not to get it. Jesus says he’ll talk to Gregory. He says right now Hilltop is going well, but tomorrow it could be Alexandria. He asks for a few days.

Some guy comes in and says “they’re back.” A negotiation with Negan has gone wrong with people getting killed and being held hostage. A hostage’s brother (who is wearing a man bun — no, just no) has been returned along with a message from Negan in the form of said brother stabbing Gregory in the stomach. Everything goes nuts, Abe is being strangled, Daryl breaks the guy’s arm, man bun holds a knife to Rick’s throat. Rick turns the tables on him though, slicing man bun’s jugular vein.

Some woman knocks Rick in the head and Michonee knocks her down. Jesus says Negan was their friend, but now he’s nothing except a coward attacking them. Gregory is still just lying there bleeding. Geez. Jesus tells Rick things aren’t as simple as they seem and to give him some time.

The doctor is able to patch Gregory up. Negan is head of a group called The Saviors. They made demands and threats to Hilltop, and beat one of the children to death in front of everyone because Negan wanted them to understand where he was coming from. Gregory isn’t the best at confrontation and agreed to give Negan half of everything in exchange for Hilltop not being slaughtered. Daryl asks how many people Negan has. Jesus says they don’t know, but they’ve seen groups with as many as twenty. Daryl says they can take him out, but he wants an exchange. Jesus says he’ll take it to Gregory.

Rick says Gregory’s people have food, they don’t, and they need to trade their services in exchange. Jesus says Gregory wants to talk to Maggie.

Maggie goes to Gregory’s room where he’s recuperating. She says he’s lucky they were there. She asks if Jesus told him about the deal and says in exchange for supplies, they’ll get rid of Negan and The Saviors. Will work for food. Gregory says Jesus will make the arrangements. He also says it’s fun and exciting because he doesn’t get out much. Maggie says if they continue with Negan, pretty soon they won’t have anything. She wants half of what he has right now or the deal is off.

Gregory tells her she has a deal. He asks if she wants anything else and she says yes. She wants some of the Hilltop people to go with them.

Rick loads the RV with supplies. He asks one of the Hilltoppers (Hilltopites?) to come with them because he needs someone who knows Negan’s layout. Jesus is coming along too, just for the hell of it.

Maggie gets an ultrasound.

The RV leaves the compound. Glenn passes around the sonogram photo.

Next week, Rick decides on a strategy to come for The Saviors before The Saviors come for them.

Feb22

February 21, 2016 — The Dead Walk & the Wives Throw Shade

Posted on February 22, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

The Walking Dead

Carl certainly seems to have recovered well from his eyeball mishap. All seems to be copacetic in Alexandria as well.

Denise gives Daryl a list of things needed as he’s going on a supply run with Rick. She also wants some soda and candy for a couple of the others. Ha-ha-ha! She calls soda “pop” and has to explain that to Daryl, saying she’s from Ohio. Me too, and it took me forever to start calling it “soda.”

Eugene gives Daryl a list of agricultural needs. Daryl and Rick drive off. Rick thinks today is the day they’ll find food and people. They haven’t seen anyone for weeks. Rick puts in a CD, while Daryl begs him not to. I assume they have different musical tastes.

Michonne is on guard duty. She sees Spencer going into the woods with a shovel.

Maggie asks Enid where she’s been. She says nowhere and Maggie thinks there are better places for her to be. Maggie tells her if she needs to talk to come to her.

Daryl and Rick find a feed store out in the middle of nowhere. (Is that where Enid has been?) No zombies inside, so they’re good. They find a truck and Rick suggests using it for the rest of their trip. They take the truck to a filling station, which I would doubt has any gas. They use the truck to flip over a vending machine, but instead of soda, a guy with a bandana over his nose and mouth pops out.

Dude says he was just running from the dead. Daryl asks how many and where. He says more than 10 and they probably have about 10 minutes to get out of there. He says his name is Paul, but his friends used to call him Jesus. Rick starts to ask him the three questions, but Paul-Jesus says he’s in a hurry and runs off.

Rick tells Daryl he noticed that Paul was clean with a trimmed beard, which means he’s been doing okay, and is contemplating picking him up later. They hear some gun shots and run around the other side of the station. It’s only firecrackers. Firecrackers put there by Paul who steals the truck. What would Jesus do? I’m not sure, but what he wouldn’t do is steal your truck.

Michonne follows Spencer. He’s about to whack a zombie and she does it for him. She asks why he’s there and he says he walks in between his shifts, but she’s the first one who’s noticed. She wants to walk with him, but he wants to go it alone. She says his mom told her to figure out what she wants for her life, but right now she’s trying to figure out why he’s walking around in the woods with a shovel.

Carl and Enid are also on a walk in the woods. They find a note in a plastic bag, but it’s wet, so they can’t read it. She says it doesn’t look very old and that means they’re not alone. Enid asks why they’re walking and Carl says that’s what kids do. Enid says she’s not a kid.

Rick and Daryl try chasing after the truck on foot, and come across the vending machine in the road, totally perplexing me. Daryl takes out a couple of cans for Denise. They have a drink and keep running.

Commercial break. Hey, it’s GH’s Obrecht back with Fear 462. And it looks like she’s been bitten. Or scratched. Or something.

Enid and Carl are sitting under a tree, having a snack and reading, when they see Michonne and Spencer. They don’t notice Carl and Enid. Enid says she doesn’t want to come out there anymore. Carl says okay and starts walking away, leaving her to carry everything. Nice.

They see a zombie and while Enid wants to ignore it, Carl is concerned about Michonne. He makes a sound so the zombie changes course. For whatever reason, he isn’t killing it and Enid wants to either kill it or leave. Carl knocks the zombie down and tells her if she doesn’t want to be there, to go home. So she leaves. I would too. He’s getting a little kooky.

Daryl and Rick continue to follow the truck’s trail until they finally see Paul. The truck is stopped and he’s messing around in the back. Rick grabs him from behind, but apparently Paul knows martial arts. Paul slips though and they draw their guns. Rick tells him he wants the keys. Paul says he’s not a bad guy and Rick says Paul doesn’t know what they are.

Rick gets the keys and they tie Paul up. Daryl says the knots aren’t that tight and he should be able to get loose when they’re gone. He throws Paul a can of soda and they take off, Daryl saying good-by with his middle finger.

Rick tells Daryl today is still the day. Well, they did see one person. They realize something is on the roof and stop short. Paul drops to the ground. Daryl jumps out of the moving truck and chases him. Rick stupidly stops the truck to help, which allows Paul to get back in the cab while Rick is dealing with the surrounding zombies. Paul grabs Daryl’s gun and tells Daryl to duck. He shoots a zombie coming up behind Daryl and Daryl knocks Paul out with a punch. All that has resulted from this is the truck sliding backwards and sinking into the nearby lake.

Daryl tells Rick they should go look at cars. Rick says what about unconscious Paul, since he did help Daryl. Daryl says fine, they’ll put him in a tree.

Michonne continues to follow Spencer. He tells her he’s fine, but he needs to take care of something. Or at least try. Michonne asks him to let her help, but he says she can’t. They see Carl in the distance being followed by a zombie.

Spencer says he thought he “saw her that night.” It’s Deanna. I thought they shot her that night. Spencer and Michonne put a hold on her and Spencer puts her out of her misery. So that’s why he was trolling the woods. The scene is brief, but sad.

Spencer and Michonne bury Deanna. He says she left him a note saying he knows his way, but he doesn’t think he does. Michonne says he loved his family and he still has a home in Alexandria. They head back.

Rick and Daryl have still unconscious Paul in the new truck. Rick says Paul must have a hard head, but Denise needs to take a look at him when they get back.

Carl is rocking Baby Judith on the porch. Michonne tells him she saw him with Deanna and that he should have left her or killed her. He says that’s stupid. She says what’s stupid is him being out there and Carl says he couldn’t leave her out there like that and he couldn’t kill her. She asks him if he was playing some kind of game. He says he thought someone who loved her should be the one to end her existence and Michonne would have done the same thing.

Daryl and Carl get back to Alexandria. Paul is still out and they carry him to Denise’s house. Or office. Whatever. They leave Paul on a mattress with a glass of water and a note. We don’t see what the note says.

Rick tries to get some shut-eye on the couch and Michonne tells him to move over. They watch Judith on a monitor. Michonne asks where Daryl is and Rick says he’s watching over a guy. Michonne is like, a guy? and asks him if he wants to talk about it. He says no, but what about her day? She says same thing and Rick asks if she found a guy too. He gives her some mints and says he had toothpaste per her request, but it’s at the bottom of the lake now.

All of a sudden, they realize they’re holding hands. They kiss. Dammit! I want her with Daryl. They move on to more than kissing.

We don’t see what happens next (nor do I want to), but in the next scene they’re nakey and in bed sleeping. Someone tells Rick to wake up. Paul is there. Now I’m wondering where Daryl is.

Next week, I have no idea what happens. Either they didn’t show it or I missed it somehow.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

The ladies are talking about Sheree having Googled Kim’s husband and tell Kim what had been discussed about him, throwing Kenya under the bus. Kenya says when Kim isn’t around, they all have something to say about Chris, but now it’s a different story. I agree. Kenya was not the only one talking about him in a negative way, but now he’s the most wonderful guy ever.

When Kim leaves, Kenya says what’s up with them not saying to her face what they said behind her back. Kenya says the rumors about Chris being gay have been around for years, so it’s not like she’s talking out of turn.

Kim and Nene meet for brunch. Nene feels badly about what happened in regard to Chris. Kim says she’s felt like a target and Nene says she should address it and not be passive.

Phaedra joins them and Nene fills her in. Both Nene and Phaedra say they’ve been Kenya’s targets in the past. Kim says she’s not going to lower herself. Nene says she has to do something, and Phaedra says it’s not necessary to lower herself. They role play to give Kim a reading lesson. They totally make fun of Kenya, which I guess is okay with Kim who finds it hysterically funny. Oddly enough, I think she just did lower herself.

Kandi and Todd go to meet with a potential chef for their restaurant. Todd says everyone is on board with it except Aunt Bertha. The aunts and Mama Joyce have been invited to check out the tasting menu. The chef comes out with the food and says if they don’t like it, he didn’t make it. Ha-ha!

The food looks phenomenal and everyone loves it except Aunt Bertha. She’s only okay with the ribs, which she says are off the chain. Everyone is also good with the restaurant idea except Aunt Bertha. Apparently, Aunt Bertha is a real pita.

Kim says while she appreciates Nene and Phaedra’s advice, reading isn’t her style. She calls Chris and tells him about the ladies Googling his sexual preferences. Chris isn’t bothered, but he mentions that there’s plenty on Google about all of them, like mug shots. Kim says she’d rather play grown than play dirty. Um, Kim, you weren’t playing grown in that restaurant.

Peter takes the group on the river walk that he calls the Jamaican Six Flags. The place is beautiful, but right away Nene is all I can’t do it. She waits while the others go. Kenya and Matt are at the top before anyone else. Cynthia says everything isn’t a competition and it could have been a bonding experience. Nene says she doesn’t like how Kenya is isolating herself. At least she did the activity and didn’t sit it out on the side.

Afterward, the group goes to a jerk place. I don’t mean the people are jerks, appropriate though it may be for this group; I mean the way the meat is smoked. Phaedra makes a face like she smelled something bad while she’s eating. The guys start bugging Matt about the age difference between him and Kenya, which I guess is also okay.

Nene talks about the brunch with Phaedra and Kim, and says they talked about Kenya. She says Kim doesn’t understand what the problem between them is, and suggests they discuss it. Kim says she feels Kenya crossed a line and disrespected her. She wants either no conversation or cordial conversation, but no more talk about her family. Kenya congratulates her on speaking for herself. Cynthia interrupts and says that Kim wasn’t throwing shade and Kenya was disrespectful. Kenya asks not to be interrupted, since she didn’t interrupt Kim. She says she doesn’t hate Kim but she’s indifferent.

Cynthia brings up how Kenya pulled Kim’s chair during an altercation. She says things like that can make an argument turn physical and she owes Kim an apology. Kenya thanks her for her honesty. Kim says it should hae been handled a different way. Kenya apologizes for the chair thing. Kim says if there’s mutual respect, they can get along and agree to disagree.

Cynthia thinks there’s a deeper issue than Kim and Kenya, and that she and Kenya need to address some things. Nene leaves and Peter suggests they have a shot. Frankly, I think that often leads to problems with these people too.

Sheree, Nene and Cynthia go to some ice cream place where I want one of everything. Cynthia seems to think the conversation with Kenya was productive. She also says Nene has come a long way. Really? Cynthia brought a list of things she wants to go over with Kenya and goes over it with the other two. Because it’s okay to throw shade when it’s you.

It’s the last night and Cynthia says despite the problems, she thinks everyone had a good time. They gather for cocktails at a gazebo near the water. Phaedra says Peter looks good enough to bury and Porsha asks if he’s “casket sharp.” Phaedra says when you look good enough to meet Jesus, you’re looking pretty good. She means the real Jesus, not the new Walking Dead guy. Cynthia says that this is the Peter she fell in love with.

It’s dinner time and Kenya still hasn’t shown up. Peter starts talking about how great the trip was, going over everything they’ve done so we can see flashbacks. Kenya and Matt arrive. Sheree’s ex, Bob, who came on the trip is hoping to get back together with her. They all make funny comments about Kenya and Matt. Matt used the word “love” in his conversation with the guys, so that gets some attention.

They talk about the commercial and Cynthia says the only thing missing for her was Kenya. Kenya says she wasn’t given the opportunity to present her concepts and it was hurtful. We flash back to all that mess. Cynthia says even though she chose Kim to direct, she’d wanted Kenya to play opposite her as the best friend. Kenya jokes that was before Nene came back. Nene says she’s always going to be around. Interesting, since the last season we heard from her, she couldn’t stand working with any of them. I guess the big world of acting wasn’t as easy as she thought.

Peter says Kenya was her first choice. Kenya says that when she felt everyone was against her, Cynthia was the one who stood up for her. She says she was in her feelings and behaved like a jerk (this time meaning as in a person). She says she’s sorry she let Cynthia down. Cynthia says it was important to her and sometimes friends have to do what they don’t feel like doing. She accepts the apology, but I think that was an unnecessary comment.

Phaedra, being the cretin she is, says that she thinks it’s just more bad acting form Kenya. I like this woman less and less every episode.

They have a final toast.

Next week, the ladies have a lingerie photo shoot, Matt wants a wife, and Phaedra’s kids visit their dad in prison.

The Real Housewives of Potomac

Is the season over yet?

I notice Ashley’s voice goes up a notch when she gets excited. This isn’t a good look when doing business.

Karen and her daughter, Raven, are taking a self-defense class. Karen wants her daughter to learn to defend herself since she’s going off to college. About a year prior, Karen was mugged and had her diamond necklace stolen. She says she kept her ring though, since she took it off and slid it into “Never Never Land.” I don’t even want to think about what that means, but I am wondering how she accomplished that during the mugging.

Karen says the job of a parent is never done, so she also bought Raven a hot pink stun gun.

Ashley and Michael are opening a restaurant geared toward Australian fare. She’s looking for an assistant and conducting interviews. When they get to asking the candidates about their knowledge of Australia, it’s pretty much a blank slate across the board. After the interviews, Ashley and Michael discuss the interviewees and they both are leaning toward Jasmine.

Robyn comes to visit Charrisse. Since Charrisse gets “NBA life” (whatever that means), Robyn says she shares a bond with her that she doesn’t with the others. They have some food and wine. Robyn tells Charrisse that her ex-husband might have to take out-of-state work. Charrisse asks if she’s still in love with him. Even though she lives with him, they share a bed and have sex, Robyn says they’re not in a relationship. Okay. Robyn says she thinks she’s going to stay in Potomac if he goes, but if she misses him, that might change.

Charrisse says she’s on the fence about her marriage. She says her husband is a great father, but a lousy husband. She’s feeling she’s at the point where something drastic has to happen. She basically blew him off in a text to which he never responded. She says wants a divorce, and Robyn tells her if he won’t do it, she’ll have to.

Gizelle is having a girls’ night with Karen, who’s hoping to gossip with her instead of about her. Is this the level of etiquette she’s so proud of? They talk about how Ashley had a cash bar at her birthday party, which I have to admit is a bit crass. Gizelle said she walked out without paying because she didn’t know. I’ll have to remember that one for next time. Karen says she wants to school Ashley in how to entertain.

Karen is having a couples dinner. She says it’s BYOM — Bring Your Own Man. Gizelle wonders about the ladies whose husbands work away from home. They discuss Katie making out like crazy with her boyfriend at the birthday party and seem to think she’s “on something.” They sound like my grandmother or Archie Bunker. A storm starts outside and thunder happens every time they try to talk shade. I think God is trying to tell them something.

Ashley’s mom and brother come over. They play a game of pool and she tells them about the other Potomac ladies. Ashley’s mom was a single mother and they’re very close. She recently had to file bankruptcy and I wonder why Ashley didn’t help her out. Oh, okay, it seems like her mother doesn’t want her helping out.

Katie is waiting for Karen at a restaurant and talking to her boyfriend on the phone. She’s nervous because she wants to get her on the host committee for her foundation.

Karen arrives. Karen says something about the PDA at Ashley’s event and Katie apologizes. She asks what Karen thought about the cat theme and Karen says she’s a little old for all that nonsense, and calls it a teeny-bopper party. Karen approaches her about the Rost Foundation. She says she has a month to get a casino night together and needs Karen’s help. She’s looking for donations in the amount of 100K, and asks Karen if she’ll be on the committee, but Karen says she’s booked. And she won’t give up her Rolodex either. Do people still use those? Probably only people who use phrases like teeny-bopper.

Gizelle meets her date, Herman. She’s getting back into the dating pool, and I’m thinking she can do better than this. It’s her second date and I guess his credentials are impressive. They make a toast with water and he gets a little forward. The raw oysters come and Herman made the mistake of thinking they were fried. Although I like them now, I made this same mistake in a restaurant when I was 12. I was totally grossed out once I put the oyster in my mouth. I didn’t want to swallow it, but I didn’t want to spit it out in a restaurant full of people, so I just sat there with it in my mouth until I couldn’t deal anymore and chugged it down.

Gizelle thinks Herman needs a little more pizzazz. I could have told her that. She invites him to the couple’s dinner. He starts talking about it being a third date, but she says it doesn’t count. On top of it he makes the horrible mistake of calling the oysters “clams.” I’m not saying it’s horrible — I do it all the time — but Gizelle seems put off by it.

Katie and Andrew meet Ashley and her husband for a round of golf. Katie says she doesn’t really like the game, but she likes the outfits and driving the cart. Ashley hits the dirt the first time out, but manages to hit the ball on the second try.

The girls have a drink while the guys continue on with the game. Katie tells Ashley about Karen not being able to be on the committee. She tells Ashley that Karen thought the birthday party was for a younger crowd and Ashley says that was kind of ageist. Katie says she likes hanging out with Ashley rather than the old biddies, who aren’t really that old, but act like it.

Karen had matriarchs of the community to help her when she first was getting the hang of big society, and she feels responsible to help Ashley the same way.

Robyn is playing a game of basketball with her ex, Juan, and their kids. She says they’re technically not a couple (seriously, I’d like to know just what they are), so she doesn’t think she wants to bring him to the dinner because they have enough pressure.

Ashley and Michael arrive first for the dinner, then Gizelle with Herman. The rest trickle in. They’re on a docked yacht. Say that three times real fast.

Karen’s husband Ray makes a toast. Michael suggests they go swimming and Ray is all for it, but Karen puts the kibosh on that idea. There’s a lot of cocktail chatter, none of it interesting. Katie tells Gizelle about Karen calling her out about the PDA. Gizelle says it really wasn’t cool, and Katie says she’s sorry and that she’d had too much to drink. I’d be drinking a lot too, if I was around these people. Gizelle says she’ll help with the casino night.

Michael wants to go swimming, and begins to take his shoes and pants off, and Gizelle discourages it. Karen is all like, “we” don’t do this. Is that the royal “we” or is she pregnant? She says she loves what he’s trying to do, but not here. Ashley invites all the ladies to their beach house for a girls’ weekend.

Next week, Gizelle doesn’t have a bed at the beach house, Katie is called out again because no one can drop it, the ladies turn it out at a gay club, and Karen is done with Ashley.

Feb15

February 14, 2016 — Potomac, Atlanta & Alexandria

Posted on February 15, 2016 by theresakp

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

The Real Housewives of Potomac

I started this and I’m going to see the season through if it kills me.

Karen has an appointment to look at planes for flight lessons and Gizelle is along for the meeting. Karen and Gizelle talk about Ashley. Karen thinks she needs guidance and Karen is just the one to give it to her.

Ashley meets Katie at the park. She wants to spend time with Katie’s kids to get used to having her own. Ashley tells Katie how the whiskey tasting party went.

Karen picks out a plane and prays over it.

Ashley and Katie push the kids on the swings. Ashley tells Katie about a birthday party she’s having for herself. She’s going to be 27 and says she wants a baby yesterday. Katie wants to have a baby with boyfriend Andrew, but says not being married first isn’t a good look.

Ashley tells Katie about how she googled everyone and tells her that Robyn and her ex-husband only have 25 bucks in their bank account and are declaring bankruptcy. in her individual interview, Ashley says she googles everyone because today you don’t know what people are up to. Just ask Teresa Giudice about that one. I’m actually kind of surprised that she needs to google other members of a reality show she’s on.

Charrisse is entertaining a friend and talks about how difficult life is because her husband is married to his job and she seems like the mistress. She longs for the good old days when they were poor. I’m sure it sounds good, but I’ll bet she’d be crying if she lost all that money. She’s actually crying now, but she’d be crying a lot harder if she couldn’t pay for that Louis Vuitton.

Her friend asks if she wants to keep fighting for her marriage. Charrisse says that she wants to keep her family together, but she’ll see.

Gizelle and her daughters are meeting her ex-husband, Jamal. Gizelle says they’re still family despite his cheating ways and the divorce. He’s been on TV, being a well-known pastor in the Baltimore area who’s active in civil disobedience. Gizelle isn’t interested in getting back together, but they seem to have worked things out pretty well as far as the kids are concerned.

Karen shows up for her first flight lesson and is a little freaked that they’re changing planes on her. That prayer doesn’t count now. Her husband and daughter are there for moral support. Karen gets the plane off the ground, although I’m sure the real pilot does most of the driving the first time out. Karen says the next thing on her bucket list is the mile high club. I don’t suggest she join it while piloting the plane though.

Katie says that during her divorce, she was overwhelmed and Andrew helped make peace with all the parties involved. Katie’s nanny, Mae, is a lesbian and she says she loves that because she loves her energy. What? What does that mean? They’ve all recently moved into Andrew’s house. Some design changes were needed, so Katie took charge. Boy, is he going to be surprised when he gets home and finds out his old bedroom is a walk-in closet.

Robyn is giving her kids dinner. She has to get to work and they’re all, eww! and I hate this food, like typical kids. The sitter comes and she dashes to some PR event.

Karen calls Charrisse whose kids are in New Jersey with their dad. Karen offers to come over to keep her company since she hates being alone. While they’re having champagne, Gizelle and Katie decide to surprise them. Charrisse says Gizelle is welcome as long as she doesn’t act like she did at her crab boil. If I hear the words “crab boil” one more time, I’m going to scream. Especially since they don’t evoke anything close to what Charrisse had.

The girls compare shoes and talk about Ashley’s upcoming birthday party. Gizelle tells them about how one of the first things Ashley talked about to her was how big her man’s doodad was. Then they get into a conversation about doodads. Katie tells them about Ashley googling everybody. For once I agree with Karen when she wonders what anyone needs to do that for.

Katie tells them about how Ashley brought up people’s finances. Karen says maybe Ashley doesn’t know any better, that she’s a diamond in the rough that needs buffing. This leeds Charrisse to start talking about how she’s having a difficult time in her marriage. Gizelle asks how she’s feeling about it, but Charrisse is on the fence. Charrisse starts to cry. Gizelle says not to be afraid to share because they’re all in her corner. She’s pretty nice for someone who was on the wrong side of this hard-on just five minutes ago.

Ashley is having her birthday party in the same place where she used to bartend, and her husband is part owner. The party’s them is “Big Kitty Bash.” I guess everyone is dressing up as a cat?

Andrew comes home to his newly designed place, including a new room added for the nanny. Katie says if he’s going on trips where he doesn’t invite her, he’s going to have to get used to this kind of thing. My husband used to say every time he went away, he came back to a different furniture arrangement, so I can identify with this. Andrew is pretty startled. He says he’s not a fan, and maybe they could have discussed it first, but he’ll accept it.

Everyone is getting ready for Ashley’s party. Gizelle has Robyn on the phone and tells her about Ashley’s googling. She tells Robyn how Ashley gossiped about Robyn’s financial situation. Robyn wonders if she should go to the party. Gizelle says of course, since she wants Robyn to stir the pot.

Karen thinks Ashley needs to be schooled in he etiquette of googling. Charrisse is under the mistaken impression that someone might hit on her at the party. I don’t see cat outfits, but there’s a lot of animal prints, and there are some kind of nakey servers wearing only cat body paint.

Robyn says happy birthday or not, she’s going to deal with this googling business. Katie and Andrew are making out. How old are these two? OMG — it’s a cash bar! Gizelle tells Robyn to question Ashley on her googleability and I laugh, even though I’m still stuck on the fact there is a cash bar at a rich person’s birthday party. the worst wedding I ever went to had a cash bar.

Hey here’s a first. I think Katie is wearing a Betsey Johnson leopard print dress that I have. If it’s not that same dress, it’s awfully close. One time, a General Hospital character wore the same sweater I own. Unfortunately, I hadn’t worn it yet and then I was afraid that I would be seen as copying them when it was really the other way around.

Robyn approaches Ashley. Ashley says Robyn seemed standoffish, so she thought something might be going on in Robyn’s life. When she googled Robyn, stuff about Juan’s bankruptcy came up. Ashley says maybe it has something to do with that, maybe Robyn just does’t like her. Robyn says it’s neither — which Ashley would know if she’d actually asked Robyn rather than going to the internet for answers. Robyn says that because of past experiences, she proceeds with caution when it comes to new people. I’m sure this didn’t help her trust issues any. Ashley has the nerve to say Robyn should have gotten to know her before making any decisions because Ashley isn’t out to hurt her.

Gizelle is like how can she say that when she’s out there googling stuff and talking about it to other people? Ashley says again that she didn’t mean anything by it. Everything is suddenly cool, which seems to be how it works with this group, but Robyn is still miffed. I would be too. Not that Ashley checked Robyn out, but hat she said something to Katie. She had no business gossiping about Robyn’s financial situation.

Katie and Andrew won’t stop making out and Gizelle says it’s like he just came back from war. Ashley says 27 is a big year for some stupid reason and gets a Porshe as a gift. It has one of those big bows on it. Ho-hum.

Next time. Gizelle’s date feeds her oysters, Ashley’ mother has a problem and Ashley’s husband is lookin’ like a fool with his pants on the ground.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Honestly, these are some of the worst Housewives taglines ever. I cringe every time I hear them.

Peter is taking everyone on a bus tour to Kingston. Jamaica is his homeland and he wants everyone to see everything. Malorie shows up on the bus, but Kenya has decided to go to a spa with Matt instead, so it’s like an in and out item.

Cynthia tells everyone that someone told Kenya that Cynthia denied their friendship. Sheree says it was her and that’s not what she said. Cynthia says that it got heated before she could explain how she felt. Cynthia starts weeping about friendship and Nene and I don’t know what. Sheree suggests she and Kenya have a talk when things have calmed down. Kim starts yelling about how she got left off of the friend list and to stop the bus immediately. It’s pretty funny and breaks the tension.

While they’re in the bubble bath (!), Kenya tells Matt her side of the Cynthia friendship. Like I’m sure he cares.

Nene says when they get back, she’ll invite Kenya for a cocktail and try to straighten things out. Peter is taking the group to some barbecue place and Phaedra gets overly excited about eating barbecued goat, which gives me a picture of her on a spit with an apple in her mouth. She’s really gotten obnoxious in the past couple of seasons.

Peter’s relatives meet them at the restaurant. This is the first time Cynthia is meeting the ones who live in Jamaica. The food looks fantastic and it’s all farm/sea to table. Peter tells a pointless story. Kim announces the call time for the commercial as 10 am. She seems pretty organized. It’s time to say good-by to the relatives.

The girls are back at the hotel and there’s a buffet by the swimming pool. I’m gaining weight just watching this trip. The guys go to a nearby martini bar.

Nene knocks on Kenya’s door. Kenya says she ordered a chicken sandwich, but Nene doesn’t look like one. Ha-ha, Kenya! Nene asks Kenya to come down for a nightcap. Kenya says Cynthia hurt her feelings. Nene says Cynthia never bashed her and that Cynthia was crying about it. Kenya relents and joins the group.

Cynthia say she cherishes Kenya’s friendship and loves her, and she’s sorry if it didn’t come off that way. Nene asks if Kenya is going to come to the commercial shoot and she says she’ll be supportive.

Peter asks Matt what he does. He’s a personal trainer and also a veteran. The guys make fun of Matt’s age — which is 28, so he’s not a baby and he certainly doesn’t act as immature as these idiots — and then Peter wonders why he’s not super sociable. Peter continues to act like a jerk and Matt finally gets up and walks away. Peter says something about him walking a girl walk and makes fun of him. I hate Peter.

Kim isn’t with the ladies and they start talking about her husband. They all agree he has a lot of personality. Kenya brings up that there are rumors that he’s gay and he’s called Chrissie behind the scenes, and they’re also called Tootie and Fruitie. Cynthia wants no part of this and I don’t blame her. Nene says, well he does tap dance. So I guess that must mean he’s gay. Another what? I’m in agreement with Sheree (another first) when she says they shouldn’t be talking about Kim and her husband when neither one of them is there to defend themselves. Geez. I don’t know which group is more childish, the men or the women.

Chris has left Jamaica because he has to get back to work, so Kim leaves the kids with their nanny. All of the pre-production has been done, so all they have to do is shoot. Kim gets to the location first. Everyone marvels at what a beautiful day it is and they’re right. The water and the sky are incredibly blue. Cynthia is wearing a blue flowing caftan and looks amazing in the shots.

On the bus to the shoot, Phaedra asks about Matt and Kenya’s spa date. It was some kind of couples thing, so of course Phaedra has to talk nasty. She tries to put Matt on the spot. Why?

Cynthia and Malorie are doing some shots of putting on and taking off the glasses. The premise is that life is better with the glasses on. Totally unoriginal and I’d rather watch John Carpenter’s They Live. Rain clouds start to come up. They get the shot before it starts to get dark.

Kim says it’s going to pass. The bus arrives with the rest of the girls. There are some kind of little paddle boats and Kenya goes out on one with Matt. Nene passes out a bunch of accessories to the girls that are going to be in the commercial. I guess Kenya took a pass. Kim directs everyone in a scene where they pretend to be fans of Cynthia. Lightening starts to happen way out on the water.

Kenya and Matt come back. Cynthia is annoyed because Kenya isn’t acting like much of a friend for all her whining. Matt tells Kenya about Peter and the others causing him grief.

Peter says let’s have a wrap party. A rainbow happens and everyone takes it as a sign.

Porsha’s whatever, Oliver, shows up. They’d met on the Miami trip, but she hasn’t seen him since. He pretends to be interested in what she has to say. He asks what the plans are and she tells him about the wrap party. She shows him his room and they flirt.

Porsha introduces Oliver at the party, which is in some bar. They have champagne and appetizers. Kenya shows up, and she and Matt order drinks at the bar. Peter talks smack about Matt’s age. Phaedra acts like being by herself is tough. Kenya joins the ladies.

Phaedra asks why Matt is sitting alone and Kenya says the guys kind of hazed him the night before and it got old quickly. Suddenly, Matt is playing pool with the guys and all is good. It’s like Potomac deja vu.

Cynthia thanks everyone and says she wishes Chris could have been there. Everyone talks about how cool, talented and hilarious Chris is until Sheree puts the kibosh on that and tells Kim the girls were talking gay talk about Chris.

Next time, gay rumors continue, Aunt Bertha is back and the girls climb a waterfall.

The Walking Dead

When we last left, the church tower had fallen, the zombies had busted in and Alexandria was a mess.

Daryl is driving back to Alexandria with Abe and Sasha in the back seat. They’re waylayed by a motorcycle gang. The leader tells them to drop their weapons because their weapons are Negan’s weapons. They’re outnumbered and turn over the guns.

Sasha asks who they are. The leader (is he Negan?) says they have questions too and they’ll be asking them when they drive Daryl and crew back where they belong. First, he wants to know about what else they have, since there’s always more. Abe asks who Negan is. The leader gets defensive and weird, and says they’ll drive them back to where they came from, but don’t ask questions in the meantime.

The leader cocks his gun and Sasha tells him he doesn’t have to shoot them. He says he’s not going to kill them, then says he is, then everything blows up. It’s Daryl with a serious weapon and he’s just blown the whole lot of the motorcycle guys away. Daryl gets back in the truck with Abe and Sasha. It looks like those motorcycle guys are dead, but I have the feeling we haven’t seen the last of them.

Alexandria is total chaos.. The core group led by Rick has put entrails and blood on themselves so they can wander among the zombies.

Rick gathers the group and gives them instructions on splitting up and reconvening. Jessie doesn’t think they can make it with Judith, but Father Gabriel promises to keep her safe. Oh yeah, that’s just the guy I’d leave my baby with. Jessie tries to palm Sam off on Gabriel too, but Sam swears he can deal. Gabriel goes off to the church with Judith and Jessie reassures Rick that it will be okay.

Carol, Morgan, Eugene and Rosita are holed up in a brownstone. The Wolf and Denise watch the zombies from behind a wrought iron fence in a stairwell. Glenn is looking for guns and ammo at the church. Enid tells him that he’d said if you run, that’s how you lose people, even the ones who are already gone and asks him what it means. He says the people you love are always inside of you, and if you lose yourself, you lose them. They tell each other who the important people in their lives were and waste valuable time.

The Wolf tells Denise he needs her. She says she’ll just slow him down.

Enid says she wants to help Glenn get Maggie over the wall to safety. She finds the gun that Glenn has been looking for.

The Wolf says Denise was right, he wasn’t born this way, he changed. Lady Gaga’s song plays in my head. He says he wants to help her change. He says she’ll see one day that they’ve been given a gift.

It’s nighttime. Rick and company are still wandering about with the zombies. The worst thing about all of it is how I have to try and remember the minor characters names again. Sam isn’t being as cool as he thought he was going to be and starts to freak. Jessie tells him to come on. Great. He’s frozen and starting to cry and he’s going to get everyone killed. Nope, he just got himself killed. Good riddance. You were just a hindrance anyway. Carl pulls Jessie away, but it doesn’t work and she gets eaten too. Good. That will teach you to slow everyone down. She’s still hanging onto Carl and Rick hacks her arm off. Okay. That was a good one.

He and Carl get the blip out of there. That other crummy kid (Ron?) holds a gun on them but Michonne machetes him from behind. Are all the losers gone now. Carl keels over. Geez. Michonne hacks their way to safety.

Eugene ponders a very large knife. He says sooner or later, they’re fighting their way out. Rosita basically calls him a chicken and says they will, but he won’t.

The Wolf gives hindsight suggestions about fighting the zombies. He tells Denise they’re going to find a gap and go over the wall. He says it’s safer out there than where they are and to start moving and not stop. The go. The Wolf does some excellent head stabbing. Denise tells him if they can get to the infirmary, she can save his life. They change direction.

Morgan asks Carol about her child and husband. He says he had to stop her and she says she should have killed him. He says she can’t, but I dunno, I’ve seen her do it.

Denise and the Wolf book it to the infirmary. They don’t make it though, since Carol shoots the Wolf from a rooftop. Great timing, Carol. Denise goes running into the brownstone. Rick comes in next with Carl in his arms and Michonne following. I think Carl has lost an eye. Denise yells for supplies.

Rick parts the curtain and sees the place is surrounded by zombies. Since he’s out of his mind, he takes an ax and goes outside.

Commercial break. 10 Cloverfield Lane looks well worth seeing. It looks like John Goodman does some good work in it.

Rick is going crazy on the zombies. This is really going to help Carl tremendously if Rick gets himself killed. Good thing these zombies only come after you one at a time. Michonne goes out and starts machete-ing zombies. Others who are holed up in various places come out and start killing zombies too.

Father Gabriel, who is with a small band of people at the church, says God will save Alexandria because God has given them the courage to save it themselves.

Carol and company head out. Rosita tells Eugene he doesn’t have to go, and he makes a mini-speech about how no one gets to clock out today and this is the story people are going to tell.

Everyone gets to zombie killing, even Morgan.

Maggie is still stuck up in that cage, but the base is getting shaky from the zombies screwing with it. Glenn fights off the zombies while Enid goes up to get Maggie. Oops! Glenn is overpowered and both girls are stuck. Abe and Sasha come to the rescue with machine guns. Miraculously, all the bullets miss Glenn.

Glenn gets into the gasoline truck with Daryl. Daryl gets out of the truck and starts pouring the gas out. I hope he gives the live people a heads up before he sets that on fire. He sets a pond ablaze and the zombies seems drawn to it, although why is a good question, since as far as I know, this has never happened before.

Everyone is beating the crap out of the zombies, including Eugene, while other zombies walk into the flaming water.

The streets of Alexandria are full of the dead walking dead. The live survivors survey the damage, while Denise tends to their wounds. Rick says, “that was rough,” and I literally lol.

Rick is all proud of what they can do if they work together. He says they’ll rebuild the walls and expand them. He gives unconscious Carl a big speech about having a feeling of being able to make a new world. He begs Carl to come back.

Carl’s fingers close over Rick’s hand.

Next time, more zombie trouble with some Negan on the side.

Dec21

December 20, 2015 — Lonely Atlanta

Posted on December 21, 2015 by theresakp

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

No Once Upon A Time tonight due to The Sound of Music singalong version of the film. I shudder at the thought of this and I like The Sound of Music. Oh the irony of the movie title in this case. No Walking Dead either; another Into the Badlands marathon. And speaking of marathons, I hope those of you who get the Chiller channel have been enjoying Z Nation this weekend.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

The ladies invite Glen, Jaron and Oliver back to the ranch rental place. While they’re on the boat, Porsha gets the bright idea to play “Never Have I Ever” which sounds like a game she just made up so they can have sex talk with strangers. Never have I ever heard of it before. Cynthia says she’s learned her lesson about drinking on boats and is going to quit while she’s ahead. In her individual interview, Kandi says something about Porsha having thrown her boyfriend Duke a big party five minutes ago, and now she’s inviting dudes back to the house.

They hang out at the pool. Glen says something to Kandi about having attitude. I have no idea what he’s talking about and Kandi is obviously pregnant, so keep it to yourself. Porsha has on a barely there bikini and is shaking her booty and twerking all over the place. She has her eye on Oliver. She tells him how she doesn’t need a man for support and I laugh since her quick move on to the next guy is because Duke hasn’t paid enough attention to her lately since he’s on the road.

Glen is a bit of a d-bag. Kenya puts it out there, saying he’s erratic and crazy. His aunt, Tammy, is pretty drunk, and Kenya asks her to have him leave, but she doesn’t seem capable of that. Porsha, who started this whole thing, says she sees it’s getting messy, so she’s going to escort Oliver out and call it a night. Nice.

Kenya tells Glen he’s being weird and is making people uncomfortable so he has to leave. He advances on her and security comes out. When Tammy tries to talk to him, he knocks her to the floor. Geez, what up wit dat? Security takes Glen down. I mean they wrestle him down; they didn’t shoot him or anything.

Tammy comes to and asks where Glen is. Cynthia feels badly because she brought Tammy on the trip. Kenya says only the person behaving badly is responsible for their own behavior. The police escort Glen out and Tammy goes to the hospital. Somehow this all becomes Kenya’s fault with Porsha, Sheree and Phaedra. They claim the reason Kenya wanted Glen to leave was because he wasn’t interested in her. Sheree says she added fuel to the fire, and Kim says that if you shake a hornet’s nest, hornets are going to attack you, but this is a guy, not an insect nest. I don’t see as Kenya did anything wrong. She was being a little silly at first, but she had every reason to want those guys gone. They were getting drunk, unpredictable and insulting.

Kim’s had enough and decides to go to a hotel. When the girls start picking on Kenya, Kandi sticks up for her saying that Glen was weirding her out. When Kandi talks to Todd on the phone, he isn’t happy that she put herself in that position. She tells Kenya that Tammy came back to the house later and she can’t believe Kenya slept through it. Kenya says Tammy must have jumped the gate, and it’s like something out of a horror movie. “Girl, this is not Children of the Corn Rows,” she adds.

Someone has this reappearance filmed on their phone. Tammy comes to the door in a robe and hospital socks. Security ended up taking her to a hotel because they didn’t want the guys back on the property. In her individual interview, Cynthia objects to the video, but when she sees it, she’s laughing along with everyone else. Kandi goes home and Kenya says pretty soon it’s going to be just her and Porsha there.

Phaedra is still blaming Kenya for that idiot Glen. Sheree says that it’s wrong to label people and she and Phaedra get in a conversation about labeling African American men as aggressive and how this can make people afraid and unnecessary deaths happen. They say that the men are already an endangered species and Kenya was like any white suburbanite acting afraid. Huh? That sure sounds like a label to me. And I don’t even know how they got there from this incident because Glen was wrong and deserved to get kicked out.

Cynthia calls Tammy and asks how things at the hospital went. She has a concussion, but other than that she’s peachy keen. Phaedra invites her for dinner. I’m assuming sans Glen.

Porsha has rented a couple of mini Hummers for the girls to get around the city. They look something like golf carts without roofs.

Kim is back home where she belongs and is strolling in the park with her husband and kids. For someone who works in show business, she certainly can’t handle much outside of the house. Husband Chris (who is really quite funny) talks about not liking her being in a dangerous environment. Kim says Kenya tried to stir the pot again, and wonders if she’s going to be removed next. Not too much overreaction and paranoia. Kim says Kenya wanted to work with her, but she’s not so sure she wants to now and that she’s starting to like Kenya’s friends more than Kenya. What is wrong with these women? Did they see the same thing I did?

Porsha has a date with Oliver and Phaedra suggests she spray fragrance around her private area. I don’t suggest that anyone do this.

Cynthia says ever since she brought up her marriage issues with Peter, that’s all anyone wants to talk about. She calls Peter and says she’ll be home tomorrow and they can go out to dinner. Zzzzz…

Oliver and Porsha go to a fancy restaurant. There’s some flirtatious talk, but when Oliver moves in for a kiss, Porsha acts like she’s never heard of it. She does give him a kiss at the end of the meal for dessert. I don’t get her roll, but Oliver seems to like it. Everyone is sleeping when she gets home, so she wakes them up. She says the date was amazing and Oliver likes to talk. Cynthia says their own evening of cooking at home was blessedly uneventful.

Phaedra says if they could forget about almost everything, it was a great trip.

Todd’s daughter, Kaela, has moved back to Atlanta and Todd teases her about having a boyfriend that she’s been “making googly eyes at” on Instagram. Kandi tells Todd about the trip and says the communication between her and Phaedra seems better. She says that Phaedra has a split personality – one prim and proper, and one that has a good time – and she picked the latter to stick with on the trip.

Kim and Kenya go out to lunch. Kim says Kenya should be proud because she’s done a girl’s night out and a trip with them. Kenya says it was only a half trip to Miami though. Kenya thinks Kim really just wanted to get home to her family, but Kim continues to blame Kenya for the situation with Glen, saying that she was manufacturing drama. Did Kim have blinders on? It wasn’t like Kenya forced him to be an aggressive moron. Kim says that she didn’t want to take part in Kenya provoking someone. We flash back to Glen acting like an a-hole. Kenya says he was acting in a threatening way and that Kim wasn’t in the Jacuzzi with them. She says that she could see that if he kept drinking, it would have escalated. Kim says maybe that’s her truth, but at the end o the day she didn’t feel safe. Kenya says she appreciates the honesty. Kim says as long as there’s mutual respect and they can agree to disagree “like grown folk,” she’s okay with that.

Next week, Mr. President starts kindergarten and Phaedra is called out for her workout video that wasn’t.

Nov30

November 29, 2015 — The Dead Walk, the Wives Squawk & Dark Clouds Stalk

Posted on November 30, 2015 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

The Walking Dead

Ok, it’s creepy already. We’re going down a hallway while Tiny Tim’s Tiptoe Through the Tulips plays in the background. Jessie’s son, Sam, is drawing weird pictures in crayon. A bunch of ants crawl down the frame of his window to the plate of uneaten food next to the bed. WTF?

Moving on. Last week, the church tower fell, opening the walls of Alexandria to the zombie horde. This is not good news. The zombies are getting pretty gross too. Rick gets it together quickly and tells everyone to get inside. Very intense stuff. Deanna comes out shooting, but she’s a bad shot so not much help.

This really sucks. Even Carol is falling all over the place, she’s so startled. Rick drags Deanna’s ass inside. Maggie is having a tough time of it, but manages to climb a ladder. Since she’s climbing for two, she’s pretty motivated. The ladder falls out from under her, but she pulls herself up there. Geez, I’m tired now.

The green balloons are still floating in the sky. Eugene is somehow remaining unobtrusive, but is still outside, and Tara and the girl whose name I don’t know, save him. I’m sure someone must have gotten eaten here, but all the main characters get to safety, such as it is, while the zombie horde roams the streets of Alexandria.

Commercial break. Dammit! Why does Krampus have to be PG-13? It looks so good, but I can’t deal with a room full of kids and their cell phones.

From a distance, Glenn and Enid can see what’s going on at Alexandria. Glenn says people are still alive, but Enid says this is how it happens and it always happens. Glenn says they’re still alive and why lose people before they’re even gone? Very good point.

Jessie’s son is acting very freaky. Jessie comes busting in with Rick and a bunch of people and this kid is on his last nerve. Jessie tells him to pretend like it’s all good, but he’s petrified and not functioning. He needs to turn off that music.

Carol and Morgan are stuck together. Carol says she doesn’t trust him, but she doesn’t think he’s a liar either. She asks how it is outside and he says they’re still in the streets. Did they think the zombies would be gone by now? Carol is hurt and Morgan tells her she needs to sit down before she falls down.

Somehow Denise got stuck with the Wolf that Morgan captured. He’s like, it’s cool to talk, and she says she should be out helping people. She says he’s killed people, and he says they were freed. Denise says Morgan doesn’t want to let him go until he knows he won’t kill again. The Wolf says he has an infection from cutting himself on a rusty bumper. Denise takes a look at it and tells him he can change. Let’s hope that wound is what he’s saying it is and he doesn’t change into a zombie. He looks at Denise like he has a crush on her. Or maybe he wants to eat her. I’ve looked at cakes that way.

Michonne is checking out Deanna’s would. Are those teeth marks?

Yep, I guess so. Rick says she doesn’t have much time. He says he’s going to try and get a vehicle and get the zombies out of there.

Michonne tries to distract Deanna by discussing the plans she gave them for the new Alexandria. Deanna says that she got to do what she wanted up until the end and asks Michonne what she wants for herself. Michonne says she doesn’t know and Deanna says she’d better. She probably knows she doesn’t want to turn into a zombie.

Ron whines to Carl that they’re all dead and tells him his dad’s a killer. Carl says so is his, and that gives Ron pause for thought. Ron locks the door and attacks Carl. Then he busts open a window like a freakin’ jerk. The zombies are all focused on getting in now. Idiot! They should throw Ron out there with them.

Now everyone has to run like crazy to get away and they can barely hold the door shut with a couch. Rick asks Carl what the blip happened. This probably isn’t the time to have some big discussion. Ron goes upstairs and Carol follows. Carl draws his gun and tells Ron to give him his gun. Carl takes the gun from him. Carl says he gets that his dad killed Ron’s dad, but Ron needs to get that his dad was an a-hole. His word, although I concur.

Commercial break. Episode of Fear 462. The first passenger turns into a zombie.

Great. Baby Judith is crying and attracting zombies. Uh-oh. Deanna is gone. Rick opens the door and finds her over the crib and almost chops her in the head with an ax, but she’s like, hold on there, I’m still alive. Rick says from now on someone needs to be with her. And it can’t be Judith. Oh wow. Rick made a funny. She gives him something from Spencer to Maggie and Rick says he’ll make sure she gets it. Deanna tells him she didn’t run out to help him because she liked him, or a bunch of other reasons, but because he’s one of them. They are all his people.

Girl whose name I don’t know asks Tara if she thinks it’s curtains for Alexandria. Tara says no. For some reason Girlfriend says she thinks Abraham is dead. Tara is like, is not. Girlfriend wants to spread out from the area of the building they’re in, and Eugene says lock picking is within his skill set.

Morgan asks Carol if she’s all right and she says she’s just resting her eyes. That’s what my dad used to say when he was falling asleep in the recliner. Morgan is looking around and doesn’t see Carol. She pops out and grabs some keys from him and takes off. What?

Rick and company are having a hell of a time and the zombies have gotten totally into the house. Damn! They block the staircase with the couch.

Denise is tending to the Wolf’s wound and Carol comes in with a knife saying get away from him. Denise says he’s tied up, but she moves. I would too if Carol had a knife in my face. Morgan is right behind her with his stick. WTF, Carol?

Rick and Michonne pick off a couple of zombies and drag them upstairs. The plan is to gut the zombies, put the guts on bed sheets, and get to the armory. Rick says anyone who stays will die. Will someone please turn that record off?

Morgan says they can be better than the Wolfs; they don’t have to kill. Carol says she doesn’t want to have to kill Morgan too. I have a bad feeling about this, Beavis.

Deanna asks Michonne what’s going on. She’s not looking too good. She says it’s her life from start to finish. She has a gun and says she’s not ready yet, but she will be. She tells Michonne to go. Michonne thanks her for believing in them. Deanna tells her to figure out what she wants. Probably surviving is at the top of the list.

DAMMIT! TURN THAT RECORD OFF! Jessie tells Sam that he has to pretend to be brave and they have to go.

Carol says she’s going to kill Morgan to kill the Wolf because she doesn’t want anyone else to die. This makes perfect sense, said no one ever.The Wolf says they should kill him, but they’re all going to die anyway. Morgan knocks the knife (scissors, whatever it is) out of her hand with the stick, and they tussle. Carol gets knocked out and the Wolf gets free and grabs the knife.

Rick and company put the gut covered sheets on. Stupid Father Gabriel claims that he won’t turn back no matter what happens. We’ll see.

Denise begs the Wolf not to kill them. She says he claimed they were dead anyway. He frees himself, and comes after her with the knife and she tells him he’s full of sh*t. Eugene, Tara and Girlfriend come in, but the Wolf puts the knife to Denise’s throat, so they lower their weapons. He takes one of the guns and walks past them, holding the gun to Denise’s head. Why he wants to leave is beyond me.

Rick and the others are ready to leave the house. Hopefully, it doesn’t rain this time. This looks so disgusting, I can almost smell it. The crowd of zombies in the house reminds me of some NYC parties I’ve been to. Glenn and Enid see them come out of the house from a tree.

Deanna is about to shoot herself, but shoots a few zombies first. You go, girl!

I can understand not moving fast, but this group should probably get off the porch. That stupid freaking kid! He starts going, “Mom…mom…mom…” Shut the blip up!

Next week, Daryl and company can’t catch a break.

Oh, and thanks for the earworm, Walking Dead.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Kenya “stops by” Sheree’s house. It does look like kind of a mess, but really just a work in progress. Kenya says it’s at least 15 to 20,000 square feet. Yep, it’s big. Kenya talks about how she had her entire house gutted and it sounds like a headache. Kenya invites Sheree to a party on a yacht. She wants to give Cynthia a good time since she got stuck with that cretin, Peter, as a partner in life.

Phaedra is out shopping with Porsha, who’s looking for some cute, trashy close for Facetime with her boyfriend.

Peter is in Charlotte (good, stay there) and Cynthia invites Kandi over. Kandi tells her that she has some pregnancy issues, but she feels she’s taking it easy enough. She talks about the restaurant she and Todd want to open. Cynthia makes excuses for Peter like she usually does, but she also admits their relationship isn’t working. Please, get rid of him already.

Kim is talking to Phaedra about an event she went to with “too much boobage” and Phaedra says that she might be in with the wrong crowd here. She says she doesn’t really have a huge social life, it mostly revolves around her husband and kids. She tears up, realizing she’s lost herself somewhere in there.

Porsha dresses up like a porn star for her chat with her boyfriend. She keeps checking herself in the mirror while eons go by and she can’t get ahold of him. An hour goes by. She calls Phaedra to complain about having to wait on Duke. Phaedra says the thrill is gone and it’s run its course. Geez, it didn’t take much.

Kenya picks up Cynthia and her friend, Tammy. Kandi picks up Kim in what looks like an airport limousine. She says she needs a lot of room because of the pregnancy. Kim says she admires Kandi’s entrepreneurship. They talk about sex toys, as Kandi has a line of them. Kim says this is very different from her normal carpool experience.

Oh this should be good. Tammy’s best friend is Sheree’s ex-husband. She let’s fly that Sheree was a gold digger.

Kandi picks up Porsha and some friend of hers that we don’t get introduced to. Kim expresses concern that Kenya will bedriving the boat, but they have a legitimate captain. And some hunky bartenders. Kenya greets the rest of the guests, indicating that she didn’t invite Shemia, who is the tagalong friend. She was also at Kenya’s launch party. Kenya has to explain to Porsha that not all parties include a plus one.

Tammy acts all fangirl with Kandi having been in Xscape. Kenya makes an announcement that the party is all about Cynthia. Sheree comes on board and they shove off.

Tammy talks to Kandi about her son’s rap song and says she wants to get him in the studio with Kandi. Tammy says Sheree’s ex is producing him. Kandi is evasive and rightly so. This is no place to be bugging her about work stuff and Kandi says in her individual interview that she doesn’t want to hear about anything without a budget. Tammy says her husband is “Nazi white.” What is this girl on?

Kim pulls out a book, which is probably what I would do, and Kenya throws it overboard. Everyone is drinking heavily, except for Kandi and Kim. Now they’re going to get in the water. Brilliant. They’re wearing life jackets, but still.

Kenya says thanks to everybody for being supportive at her event despite the heat. She says the only one who threw shade was Shemia, and next thing we know, Kenya is looking to have this uninvited guest escorted off the boat. Portia uses the term “bitch” in reference to Cynthia and even though they’ve been using this word toward each other all day, Cynthia isn’t liking it. In her individual interview. Porsha says she didn’t mean it in an insulting way and suggests that the last shot must have turned her into Peter.

Kenya has to explain that Porsha should just apologize and let it go. Porsha goes to find Cynthia, who has gone to the other side of the boat with Kim. Cynthia claims that Porsha was being disrespectful. Porsha says she’s sorry, but she doesn’t feel like she did anything wrong, which isn’t exactly an apology. They get into a finger-in-your-face shouting match that ends (at least for tonight) with Porsha jumping up and onto Cynthia. I flashback to when she did the same thing to Kenya on the reunion. This girl has no self-control. They tend to throw the term “ghetto” around too, but I think this is actually it.

Next week – the fight continues and Porsha ends up flailing about on the floor again.

Once Upon A Time

I’m putting this show last, even though I watched it first. I thought if somebody new reads this and it’s the first thing they read, they’ll think I’m high or something. It’s not me, it’s the show. I’m sure my writing is as hard to follow as it is for me to follow the program. If this was the 80s, I’d swear the writers are on crack.

Hook throws the dreamcatcher in Dark Emma’s face and those black stringy things go all over, roping him in. He remembers coming to the dark side and emerges out of the forest sewer cap in the hoodie required to be in the dark one club. Rumpel is waiting for him.

Rumpel says he can get his revenge for him. And then he’ll be capable of doing what he’s always wanted to do – killing Rumpel.

Regina tells Dark Emma thanks a lot for turning Hook dark. Snow tells Dark Emma to give back their memories. David says the dreamcatchers are gone.

Hook goes to Mr. Gold’s shop and says he wants to savor killing him. He reminds Gold/Rumpel of how he came to be dark in the first place. Hook says all Rumpel has to do is get Excalibur from him and asks if they should finish what they started.

Rumpel says they have to find out more about the first dark one to stop Hook. Dark Emma says she can help, but she needs the cuff that’s holding her back to be taken off. She pleads with Henry to believe she’ll behave herself, but Henry is like, oh no, you’ve lied one too many times and you just want your dark magic back so you can be bad all over the place. Emma is bummed because they don’t trust her, but what did she expect? Trust has to be earned, dark one.

Everyone goes to the forest sewer cap, but it’s shut and they can’t get down there. Snow thinks Lancelot’s mother, the Lady of the Lake, can help. Lancelot leaves to find her. Hook asks why dark ones must dress like monks. Ha-ha! Rumpel finds him wandering about the forest whining about how he’s stuck in Camelot. Dark Emma joins the both of them. She says she wants a future with Hook, and he has to want it too. He says he does and Rumpel disappears. Emma says they can get rid of the darkness in themselves by bonding with their loved ones, and I’d swear it was Iowa from all the corn.

Mr. Gold tells Belle that if he survives the duel with Hook, he’s going to be the man she wants him to be. He’s run from battles his whole life and isn’t running from this one.

Zelena tries to come into the hospital to get her baby, but her daughter is gone. Regina says they needed to protect the child from her. Regina says the only reason she has the baby is because she killed Marion and deceived Robin.

Merida is guarding Dark Storybrooke Emma. Hook startles her and she almost shoots him. Dark Emma says the reason Hook is there is because he still has feelings for her. Hook says he’s free now, and no one can stop him. Dark Emma says the darkness is just using him; it doesn’t care about what he wants. He says she’s so afraid of losing the people she loves, she pushes them away. He says she doesn’t need the darkness, she does fine on her own. He says he wants to hurt her like she hurt him. Even when you’re a dark one, you can’t escape middle school.

In Camelot, however, Dark Emma and Hook are making out in the woods. Hook goes to get water (can’t he just conjure some up?) and he gets a headache. Rumpel appears and says it’s the sound of the dagger. He says Dark Emma must have it and she’s lying to him. Dark Emma comes looking for Hook and he asks if she knows where Excalibur is. She says something unrelated like, “How about them Mets?” to deflect the question. He asks if she used its magic on him. He’s pretty pissed that she turned him dark. He says he stopped Regina from using it on her because she should make her own decisions and she should have let him make his. Then he’s gone, poof! in a puff of red smoke. Burgundy really.

Rumpel is in the shop practicing with the sword and gets interrupted by Dark Emma. She wants Hook to last long enough in the duel for her to steal back the dreamcatchers and suggests he use magic. Rumpel says he wants to win with honor. She’s like, good luck with that.

Regina brings Zelina to her house where Robin and the baby are, reminding Zelena that she has her powers back too. Zelena says, “Once you go green, you never go queen,” referring to her tryst with Robin. Regina says she’s spent years doing terrible things beyond Zelena’s imagination, but having a child changed things. She hopes that kind of love does the Jessiee for Zelena. Robin says although he and Zelena can never be a family, she can have supervised visits with the baby. Does this baby have a name yet?

Belle, David, Henry & Snow are at the library doing research. How come they’re not using a computer? Dark Emma ambushes Henry. She asks for help with the dreamcatchers and Henry agrees.

Dark Emma searches for Hook with no luck. She summons him with Excalibur. He says it wasn’t cool for her to make him feel out of control. She says she called him because she does believe he should control his own fate. She gives him Excalibur and says let’s do this together. She says she loves him. He returns the sentiment and they make out in a field of flowers.

Mr. Gold shows up at Hook’s ship. Hook says it has to be a fair fight (that’s good of him) and heals Rumpel’s leg. They duel with swords.

Commercial break. Galavan is coming back! I liked that show & I also forgot about it. It was so weird, I didn’t think it would come back. Certainly not after all this time.

Hook and Dark Emma hook (ha-ha!) back up with the others. Merlin is staring into a bubbling caldron. Hook walks in on him and steals his heart. Rumpel says be careful, it’s pretty old. Nimue also pops in. (Every time I hear her name, that song The Lion Sleeps Tonight plays in my head.) She says she’s always loved Merlin. Hook says she lives in all dark ones, so when he crushes Merlin’s heart, so will she.

Hook and Rumpel continue to fight. Rumpel loses his sword and Hook has him at a disadvantage.

Henry, who has brought stuff to make a new dreamcatcher, takes the cuff off of Dark Emma.

Dark Emma finds Hook with Merlin’s heart. She’s pretty pissed because he tricked her. She asks Nimue what she wants and she says Dark Emma wants it too. Dark Emma gets the feels and tells Hook revenge isn’t his happy ending and if he destroys Merlin’s heart, he’ll destroy his happy ending. He says the happy ending died when she turned him into a dark one and he crushes Merlin’s heart. Whoa. That’s cold.

Hook prattles on and magic forest Rumpel pops in asking what’s the delay. When Hook looks at him, Mr. Gold/Rumpel turns the tables. I don’t think he kills him though. Belle meets Rumpel in the woods, but they don’t make out. She tells him he’s broken her heart too many times. He says, but wait a minute, I won the battle, my heart is pure now, so let’s make out. Belle basically says she has to go find herself and needs to protect her heart. There you go. After all that.

Dark Emma makes Merlin’s body go poof! in a cloud of grey smoke. She tells Hook she’ll never abandon him, not even now, makes a hand gesture (not that one) and he keels over. She brings out a dreamcatcher. She makes everyone go to sleep. She uses the dreamcatcher to erase the memories of her turning Hook dark.

Rumpel tells her no good is going to come of this. Lots and lots and lots of blue smoke envelops everything.

All of a sudden, Excalibur is back at Camelot and Arthur’s eyes bug out of his head. From the tower window, Arthur and Guinevere see the humongous cloud of smoke coming their way too. Arthur tells Guinevere that it’s dark magic coming.

Everyone gets dreamcatchers like they’re party favors. Emma says she remembers and she knows what they’re doing, meaning Hook and Rumpel.

Hook and Rumpel are at some creepy pond. Hook dips his hook into the pond. A ghost ship appears! Well, more like a gondola. There are a bunch of hooded dudes in it and one comes across the pond, walking on the water. It’s Nimue and she says she’s hear to do what dark ones do best, snuff out the light. Hook says welcome to Storybrooke. And I thought those snuffers all lived in my town.

The winter finale – whatever that is – an excuse to take a break – is next week.

Nov23

November 22, 2015 — Atlanta & the Dead

Posted on November 23, 2015 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Phaedra is treating Porsha to a colonic. A colonic is the new brunch. I’m on the fence as to whether those are really a good idea or not. Oh I see, the people who administer them are called “colonic therapists” now. Phaedra stays in the room and Porsha makes a bunch of noises when it starts. TMI right off the bat.

Porsha says that a couple of the ladies brought up some tabloid headlines that were about her new boyfriend, Duke (what is he, royalty or a Great Dane?), like him dating a transgender woman. Porsha doesn’t care as long as he has a package and he’s breathing. Phaedra goes on and on about how Apollo’s motorcycle was at Kandi’s house when the tax man was looking for it. As Kandi said last week, I think he was looking for more than that, but Phaedra wants to misdirect her anger.

There’s also a dog wandering around the colonic room. Never mind, it was Kandi’s dog as one scene was edited into another.

Peter hasn’t contacted Cynthia in a week. I’d change the locks. She’s interviewing tutors for her daughter and both her assistant, Leon, and the potential tutor are fine looking men. She does not need Peter. Nope. Not at all. Unless she wants to lose every penny she makes and be embarrassed for the rest of her life.

Leon talks to Cynthia about her Peter issues. Leon says she’s walked away from a lot of relationships and he thinks it’s worth fighting for. What?! Why? This makes Cynthia want to reevaluate things. Thanks, Leon. She had a foot out the door.

Commercial break and important information. Andy will be doing a one-on-one interview with Vicki on Watch What Happens Live, Monday at 8:30 pm.

Porsha has signed up for a celebrity charity track meet. D list apparently. I don’t recognize one other person and I watch a lot of crap. Oh, wait, is that Carrie Underwood? How did she get talked into something like this? It’s not even a real race; they’re doing sprints and acting like it’s a triathlon.

Friends are suggesting Porsha do a background check on Duke, but I don’t even think she googled him. Porsha says she wishes they’d just be supportive. Honey, that is being supportive. You don’t have a brain, so they’re looking out for you.

Kenya is having a Kenya Moore Experience event to promote her haircare brand. The event planner is the same one Cynthia used for her sunglasses launch. Kenya asks Marlo what up at Cynthia’s event with Sheree? and suggests they have a pay-the-rent party for her. I remember those.

Cynthia says it doesn’t feel good to come home to an empty bed. I have a suggestion, get rid of Peter and fill that space with someone else. He’s not even returning her calls. I have no clue what she sees in this Neanderthal.

Kim and her husband are going to Kenya’s event, and are excited about the prospect of going out sans children. She has such beautiful hair and did that platinum highlight thing that I hate. Why? She seems to have a really great relationship with her husband and has done really well with her life, which is good to see when there are so many horror stories of too much too soon with young actors.

After giving explicit instructions about wanting the air conditioners blasting, it’s hot at the event. Porsha and her plus one friend are ragging on Kenya, but since Porsha only seems up to the task of letting a man take care of her, I don’t think she should be criticizing Kenya’s efforts. I’ve grown to like Kenya. At least she can form a sentence and do basic math.

Kim shows up and a lot of flashbulbs pop. Kim says she’s not impressed with a lot of people, but gives Kandi props. The heat plus Kandi’s pregnancy is not working though, and she has to leave. Kim says it’s not her and her husband’s ideal date, but beggars can’t be choosers. Sheree comes in.

Kenya makes her entrance. She has a man with her whose name I forgot already. Needless to say, she’s not thrilled with the temperature. Cynthia says Kenya twirled out faster than she twirled in. Ha-ha!

Miss Lawrence arrives! I’d forgotten he and Kenya are friends. Kenya gets on the mic and apologizes about the heat. She thanks the people who worked on the event and tells everyone to have a good time. Eugene is the name of the guy she’s with.

Sheree says she doesn’t know if she can trust Kenya since she still wears color contacts in 2015. Okay… Shree throws more shade, and Kenya asks if she can speak to her on the side. Kenya thanks her for coming, but asks what’s up. Sheree says Kenya shouldn’t have talked about her unfinished house at Cynthia’s event. Kenya says she wasn’t making that big a deal about it, they talk contractors, and they make peace. We’ll see. Sheree is kind of a dim bulb.

Cynthis tells Peter he acted inappropriately at the party. He says he was ambushed by her friends about the video. She says if you give people something to work with, they’re going to work with it. Yep. He says he flashed back to their wedding when she came down the staircase, and all there’s been is work since they got married. Welcome to that thing we call “life.” Cynthia says there’s a disconnect between them. He seems to think it’s because they don’t spend enough time together and says it’s her fault. Cynthia says she freakin’ moved here from NYC for him for Pete’s sake, when he built that stupid bar and lost their money. He whines that it’s not his fault. She says she’s not saying that, but she’s unhappy and maybe she’s not in love with him anymore. He asks when she stopped and she doesn’t know. He says he never stopped being in love with her, but she says she doesn’t feel it and he doesn’t show it.

He says he’s been watching them drift apart, but he can’t stop doing what he’s doing (I have no idea what he means by that). He whines some more. Cynthia says they can give it one more go, but it’s not happy at present and is he up for that challenge? He says that when they’re as deep in love as they’ve been, there’s no back door. They’re definitely at odds as to divorce being an option. He says he’ll do whatever it takes. She says that she’s not going to say it’s going to be okay, just because he wants it to be. My hat’s off to her. She’s finally grown a pair.

Next week, the ladies go on a yacht day trip and there’s a lot of finger-in-your-face arguing.

The Walking Dead

Flashback to Glenn getting ripped apart. Wait. He’s not getting ripped apart. It’s Nicholas, the guy on top of him, and he scrunches underneath the dumpster. This is in a snow globe or it’s a dream, isn’t it?

Lots of zombies wandering around while Glenn looks to see how much water he has left. He emerges in the morning. The first thing I’d be doing is looking for a weapon. He looks for water instead. Hey. Stop making that crinkly noise with the bottle.

Enid yells to him from the top of the wall and tosses him some water. I’d totally forgotten about her. Glen climbs into the building and calls to Enid. He asks what happened in Alexandria. She says it’s what always happens, people die. He asks if the zombie horde broke in and what was the air horn sound. She tells him he should go. He asks if Maggie is okay.

Enid runs off and Glen follows. Okay, I guess they fooled us with his “death,” eh? Very clever. Ha-ha-ha. Now bring back that goat from the Morgan episode.

Rick sees Morgan and says he’d like to talk later. He checks out the blood that was dripping down the wall after the zombie attack. He sees Maggie at the lookout point, watching for Glenn. Rick says they’ve come back from harder things, and all of them will return. I wonder who kidnapped Rick and replaced him with this optimistic guy.

Glenn sees a zombie with his eyeball stuck to a fence and stabs him in the head. I’m sure there’s absolutely no reason for this scene except for us to see the stuck eyeball. He finds a note we assume was written by said zombie when they were alive.

Creepy Father Gabrielle is posting a notice for a prayer service. I don’t want him praying with me or for me. Rick is giving Ron gun lessons. Is anyone making bullets? That would be a lucrative profession right now. Rick gives Ron a gun so he gets used to the feel of it. It’s not going to be loaded until he learns more, but he seems a little eager to use it and I’m not liking that.

Morgan is about to talk to Denise, who has the idea Morgan is not as fine as he says he is. Rick comes by and asks Morgan to talk and they go to a mini meeting with Carol and Michonne. Carol has told Rick that Morgan refused to kill the Wolfs. Morgan says he doesn’t want to kill anyone he doesn’t have to and that Rick didn’t try to kill him way back when. He says he doesn’t know what’s right anymore, that he wanted to kill them because of what they do, but there is still the possibility that they might change, and that all life is precious. He doesn’t want to let that idea go. Michonne says he might have to. Morgan asks if they want him to go. Rick asks him if he really thinks he can stay and not end up with blood on his hands.

The zombie horde is banging on the walls of Alexandria. Rick tells Michonne they need to get to their cars and go back to diverting the zombies. He doesn’t want to tell anyone else because there isn’t time and that they haven’t even had time to catch their breaths. She says they’re doing that right now. She reminds me of one of the video exercise instructors I follow who thinks jumping jacks are a resting move. Dieanna comes out with plans for the new Alexandria.

Eugene is at zombie killing lessons and not paying attention. The instructor tells him it doesn’t matter if you die, but if the people around you die, it’s worse because you have to live with knowing you didn’t do all you could. Perhaps she’s speaking from experience.

Glenn grabs Enid before she can get out the door. He says he’s taking her home. Enid refuses. Glenn is insistent and she draws a gun on him.

Commercial break. An episode of Fear 462. The stewardess is about to use a defibrillator on a patient and this is amusing since it’s Dr. Obrechy from General Hospital. There are a few familiar faces on this series.

Glenn tells Enid to give him the gun. For a moment, I wonder if he survived the zombies only to die here, but he takes it from her. He tells her half the herd broke off and is headed for Alexiandria, so they need to get back.

Rick compulsively works on the walls while reciting “all work and no play make rick a dull boy.” Tobin comes along and starts helping.

Enid puts a struggling zombie out of its misery. She and Glenn see some green balloons tied to a post. It’s Glenn’s birthday! Enid takes the balloons.

Blood is still oozing through the wall at Alexandria. Tobin says Rick scared the hell out of him when he first came. He said things had moved slow in Alexandria and then started moving too fast, and not to give up on the people there.

Enid tells Glenn she lived with Olivia in Alexandria, but she was really on her own. Glenn says he realizes she’s scared. Enid says she isn’t and not to lecture her. Glenn tries to talk to her, but she doesn’t want it right now.

Stupid Ron gets into where they keep the firearms and steals some bullets. We already know nothing good will come of this.

Glenn and Enid, who still has the balloons (way to draw attention to yourself), get to Alexadria and see a million zombies outside. Enid says the world is trying to die and they should let it. Glenn says they’re not supposed to let that happen and he’s not going to let her die.

Holy! A Spencer is crawling across a wire above the zombies. Whoa! He almost drops into them. And he does drop into them. Tobin and Eugene shoot at the zombies as rick tries to pull Spencer back up the wall. This is pretty intense. He makes it. Rick asks what the hell they were doing and Tara gives him the finger. Spencer says he wanted to get to a car and divert the zombies. Rick says come to him first if he gets any more bright ideas.

Denise asks Morgan if everything is okay and he says it’s fine. He sees her “cheat sheets” for medical instructions. He asks how well their stocked for antibiotics. He says he needs to dress a wound and he’s not sure if it’s infected. She starts giving him the symptoms and he covers the cheat sheet, but she still knows. He says he didn’t know if he should get her involved, but it’s not his wound.

Nosey Carol sees them going down the street and follows with baby Judith. Why they don’t realize she’s behind them is beyond me, since there’s absolutely no one else outside. Carol asks Sam to watch Judith. I’m kind of not liking Carol at this moment. Sam’s son asks Carol if his father turned into one of the monsters. Carol says he only thing that keeps you from becoming a monster is killing. I have no idea what she’s talking about.

Carol goes to where Morgan is (some kind of cell) and asks what he’s hiding. Ron comes up behind Carl with the gun. Rick and Tobin continue to work on the wall. But unlike Nehemiah, Rick is distracted by Tara walking by. They banter about the Spencer thing and Deanna joins in, thanking Rick for saving Spencer. Rick says he could have gotten out to get a car in the moment Spencer fell, but he chose not to.

Everyone sees the green balloons in the distance. Maggie runs to the gate. Worried faces all around and then we see the church tower fall and smash open the wall.

The mid season finale should be a doozie.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Uncensored

Not much to say about this other than it’s a chance for Bravo to milk the franchise some more. It’s still worth watching though. From the audition videos to the outing of Kim as an alcoholic to outtakes from the dinner party from hell. Sometimes you get the best stuff in these in-between shows.

The “real” Real Beverly Hills Wives begins Tuesday, December 1.

Nov16

November 15, 2015 — Once Upon the Dead in Atlanta

Posted on November 16, 2015 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

Once Upon A Time

I’m really thrilled that they decided to make this 2 hours tonight, since it totally screws up my TV watching schedule.

David asks Arthur why he tried to burn the crimson crown mushroom. He wants to know who Nimue is and when he asks, Arthur table flips like he was on Real Housewives and runs. Hook goes after him and ends up getting tripped up, but before Arthur can run a sword through him, Dark Emma stops him with Excalibur. Hook tells her that she’s not entirely dark, and the part that saved him was the real Emma. He asks why she needs Excalibur. She says she’s doing it for him and disappears poof! in a cloud of dark smoke.

Outside Camelot (3 weeks earlier), Emma and Henry meet at the diner, and wonder where Merlin is. Everyone but Emma is freeze framed and Merlin appears. Arthur has Regina, Snow, Hook and David tied to trees. Arthur wants Excalibur and the flame to forge it back together, in exchange for her family’s lives. Merlin tells her not to seek vengeance or they’ll never be able to put everything back together.

Hook wants to know why Arthur destroyed Merlin’s message (i.e. the mushroom). David tells him to lay off, but Hook says they need it to save Emma from her dark self. Regina says there might not be a real Emma anymore. Hook wants to find out how all this happened in the first place.

Rumpel is busy staring at a snow globe. Belle and Hook come to the shop. Hook wants to know what’s going on in Emma’s head, since she says she’s doing it for him, but he’s not buying it. Rumpel says he told himself the same thing about doing things for his son, but he was kidding himself and that road goes nowhere.

Emma is staring at the spark. Rumpel says he wouldn’t try to ignite it, as it will cause more harm than good. Rumpel disappears and Henry shows up. Emma says she needs to use the darkness one last time and then she’ll use Excalibur to rid herself of it.

She goes to where her family is being held hostage, and she says she’ll give Arthur the dagger and the spark if he lets her family go. Arthur says he’ll unleash Merlin. Merlin says he doesn’t want to fight her, but Zelena says she will.

Parallel Zelena, still in the hospital, goes into labor. She says dark magic caused it.

Hook looks for Dark Emma, and decides to jump off a roof so she’ll save him. She does and he says he wants to know what happened in Camelot. She says it’s complicated and he tells her that every ring he wears has a sad story of someone he killed. She produces a ring he thought he lost and he says that’s the saddest story of all. He tells her he loves her and she asks if he really wants to know what happened. He does and she says she has something to show him. They go to the house they were going to move in to.

Dark Emma says the truth is tricky and you have to look for it. Hook looks through a telescope at the ocean. She says she knows it calms him and everything she’s done is to keep their future alive. She says if he knew what she was doing, he would stop her. She hugs him and he goes unconscious.

Parallel Zelena is about to deliver.

Zelena asks who she should destroy first, and Emma says she can have thespark. Crazy snakes jump out and hold Zelena back. Merlin tells Emma this is a battle she can’t win and they throw lightning bolts at each other. Arthur tells Merlin to kill Snow. A tree branch starts to strangle her, but Merlin fights the darkness, despite Arthur’s protests.

In the meantime, Hook has broken free, and Arthur runs like the big baby he is, telling Zelena to get them out of there. They both disappear poof! in a puff of green smoke.

Now Emma has the sword, the dagger and the spark. They all reconvene at the diner. Emma takes the spark outside to meditate on it. Regina asks her if she needs a light. Ha-ha! Emma says that Rumpel told her she’s not ready to get rid of the darkness. Regina says if she’s clinging to the darkness, there must be a good reason. She takes the dagger and commands her to say why she wants to hang on to the darkness. Emma says to protect her family, but Regina says there’s more to it than that. Hook comes out and takes the dagger away before she can get to the truth.

Zelena has a baby girl. Everyone moons over the new baby and Dark Emma shows up. They’re afraid she wants to take the baby, but she says that’s not the baby she’s after.

Hook wakes up in chains. He sees Zelena with him and she says Dark Emma sped up her pregnancy and separated her from her baby. Dark Emma appears and tells Hook that he would have stopped her. The darkness needs a vessel and she wants Zelena’s baby for that. He keeps asking her what really happened that she’s not saying.

Hook finds Emma staring at the spark. She says she knows why she doesn’t want to let go of the darkness. She says she can only admit her true feelings if she thinks she’s going to lose someone. She says the minute the darkness is gone, their future begins and she’s afraid of that. They kiss and the spark ignites. That’s not a euphemism. The spark really ignites.

Regina says she’s going to hunt down Dark Emma and show her what dark magic is really like. Sounds like a plan. Regina says the reason she has the dagger is that she’s the only one who can do what needs to be done.

Hook says his hook has magic left over and he releases Zelena. Poof! she changes her outfit into something more stylish. That’s definitely what I’d do first.

Dark Emma says she doesn’t need saving and that Regina will be better off without Zelena. Regina is like, knock it off, and Dark Emma freeze frames everyone.

Zelena and Hook go to the house. Zelena tells him good luck with the Emma thing and leaves. Hook rifles through some drawers and then takes a painting off the wall. Dark Emma enters and he zaps her into dropping the sword and freezes her feet. Zelena comes back and stabs Hook. WTF? She’s brought the dreamcatcher and wants to return the memories Dark Emma stole.

Back at the diner, Merlin says it’s time to destroy the darkness once and for all. Emma brings out the flame and they put Excalibur back together. Almost. Hook falls down bleeding. Emma says he’d had a small cut from Excalibur but it was just a scratch. Apparently not. Merlin says there’s nothing they can do, but Emma doesn’t believe it, and spirits Hook away to a field of flowers. He says she has to let him go. He says he doesn’t think he can fight the darkness another time. He expires and I’m annoyed because I really liked him.

All kinds of weird black thingies come out of Merlin and then out of the still broken Excalibur. They also come out of the sewer cap to the underworld and form a hooded figure. It’s Hook.

Emma says that the only way to destroy the darkness was to kill Zelena. Hook is pissed off and Zelena asks if he’s ready to be all dark. He says first they need to take care of Dark Emma, who I’m not sure is dark or not at this point.

Arthur pops back into Camelot and Zelena is waiting in a cool, sparkly witch’s outfit. He says there’s something that can help them in another land, DunBroch, which just happens to be where Merida is.

Merida is at her father’s grave and says she’s finally proved to the clans that she’s fit to be their queen, but the hard part comes in ruling over them. Her mother approaches and says she misses him too, but it’s time for the coronation.

Earlier in DunBroch, King Fergus is in a witch’s cabin. He says he needs some magic to lead the clans in victory over the invaders. As Rumpel has told us repeatedly, magic always comes with a price. The witch says she doesn’t need anything right now but she’ll take an IOU. And we know how that always turns out.

She does that whole eye of newt thing, her cauldron bubbles, and a helmet emerges. She says if he wears the helmet into battle, he’ll get exactly what he wants. That’s a little vague, which usually causes a problem later too.

At Merida’s coronation, before the crown can be put on her head, the witch shows up with the IOU. What did I just say? She says that the king died before he could pay her and she wants either lots of gold or the helmet back. Merida says she doesn’t have either and the witch says if she doesn’t find it by tomorrow, she’s turning everyone into bears. What’s up with that bear thing?

Merida says whoever killed her father has the helmet.

Earlier in DunBroch. Merida is on the battlefield with her father. King Fergus gives her his first bow to carry into battle. He’s also hired a soldier to teach her the art of war. She says she doesn’t need one and then proceeds to get trounced. The soldier removes “his” helmet & it’s Mulan. She says the one thing you need is honor.

Fast forwarding. Merida hunts down Mulan who has just knocked off a couple of good-for-nothings. Merida says she needs her help and gives her all the gold she has, as Mulan is all mercenary now.

Cool! Arthur and Zelena are at the witch’s cabin and a wolf comes after them. Zelena zaps the wolf. The witch says that was her pet and she doesn’t have the helmet. Zelena says no one out witches her and asks where the helmet is. The witch says Merida has it.

Merida and Mulan find an arrow that Merida recognizes and says the cloth on it will lead them to whoever killed her father. Mulan wants to get moving and Merida asks what happened to her to make her so cold. She says that a warrior never lets anything hurt them, which tells us she’s been hurt.

In old DunBroch, Mulan gives Merida lessons in fighting. One of the guys makes fun of her and Merida says she can kick his ass, but Mulan tells her fear is no way to rule.

Zelena and Arthur show up in the forest and Zelena says they need the helmet. He tells her the helmet forces people to listen to you and fight despite of fear. Zelena takes Merida’s bow from her (the one her father gave her) and says she can use a locator spell to find the helmet.

Merida says that her father used dark magic to lead and she doesn’t want to do that. She rides off, leaving Mulan to ponder her own changed self.

In past DunBroch, Merida asks King Fergus how he inspires men to lead him into battle. He tells her the only way is to show them that you’re willing to die first. Of course he neglects to tell her about the helmet.

Mulan takes the cloth from the arrow to the witch’s cabin. The wolf backs her out the door. Mulan says she’s not really a wolf and needs help remember who she is. A cauldron gets knocked over and the wolf turns into a woman. She introduces herself as Ruby, but her friends call her Red. Red explains that she knows of Mulan from her friends in other realms. Mulan asks how she ended up at the witch’s cabin.

In past Storybrooke, Snow has just given birth to Prince Neil and gives a big announcement at the diner. Red is outside the door and Snow asks what’s wrong. Red wants to go back to the enchanted forest. Snow says she’s gotta do what she’s gotta do.

Mulan asks if she found what she was looking for, but Red says she couldn’t find her people. She went to the witch for help and got turned into a wolf. Mulan says she was hoping the witch would help her hunt down who killed King Fergus. Red says she doesn’t need magic for that.

Mulan goes back to Merida and says Red can sniff out the culprit.

Back in old DunBroch, as Mulan is giving Merida lessons, Merida hears the invaders in the distance. She realizes the lessons were just a ruse to get her away from the fighting. King Fergus has his lucky helmet on and jazzes the soldiers up to fight. There’s a big battle with lots of sword fighting. Merida watches from a distance. A knight comes up behind her father and Merida draws her bow. She misses the knight and her father gets killed. The knight steals the helmet. Mulan keeps Merida from going down to the field. The knight turns out to be Arthur.

Zelena finds the helmet in a lake, but before Arthur can take it, Merida and Mulan show up. Merida wants to kill Arthur, but Mulan says it’s not about revenge; it’s about saving her people. Merida asks why Arthur didn’t have the helmet, and Arthur says the helmet he took wasn’t the magic one. Merida realizes that King Fergus threw the helmet into the lake before the battle and had led his people without magic.

Merida fights with Arthur. Mulan tells Zelena to stay out of it. Since she won’t, Red doses her with some sleeping powder. Arthur tells Merida if she reaches for the helmet, he’ll kill her like he did her father. The clan guys show up, and Zelena and Arthur (who seems to be best at running from his problems) disappear, poof! in a puff of green smoke. Merida asks if the clan dudes still want her to be queen. The head clan dude says they’ve seen her bravery and if she’s not fit to be the leader, no one is.

Merida is crowned queen and the witch shows up. The witch says if she doesn’t hand over the helmet, she’ll be leading a bunch of bears. She says she’ll destroy the helmet before handing it over. The witch says it was just a test. Her father had asked for magic to lead the clans, and she gave it to him. I think this is one of those “it was really inside you all the time” lessons.The witch gives her some magic to summon a dead spirit so she can again speak to her father.

Merida thanks Red and Mulan. Mulan gives her back the gold, and says she was just trying to get over a broken heart. She wanted to tell someone how she felt about them, and when she did, it was too late. Red says she ate the only boyfriend she ever had, but she still might be able to help. Merida says good-by to them.

Merida summons the spirit of her father. She apologizes for losing faith in him and he says he lost faith in himself and that’s why he sought magic. He says she was the one who changed his mind when she asked what it took to lead men into battle. They hug and I get teary eyed because it’s a sweet father/daughter moment and I miss my dad.

King Fergus disappears, and Merida says, “Arthur, you have no idea what’s coming to you.”

The next episode is 2 weeks from now. Good, because this episode was a rough one.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Cynthia questions why Peter couldn’t be bothered to support her when she made her entrance to her sunglasses event. True to form, he walks away since he was called on his BS.

Tootie is here! Kenya comes to her studio. She also directs now and Kenya gives her props on her career moves. She tells Kim about her Life Twirls On pilot and asks her to take a look at it and maybe come on as a director. Kim is a little hesitant. Kenya asks why she never sees Kim out and about. She says she’s more focused on family. Kenya gives Kim the DVD of her pilot.

Cynthia confers via SKYPE with her business partner, Tiffany. They decide to do a launch party in Miami. Peter left for Charlotte (where his side honey is) before Cynthia got home. She tells Tiffany about the issues she’s having with Peter. She says it’s exhausting pretending everything is okay in public. She says she consumes herself with work and when she thinks about the personal stuff, it’s overwhelming. Tiffany tells her she has to deal with it.

Porsha (who spells her name wrong, so I’ve been spelling it wrong) thinks she’s going to build a brand that rivals several Jessicas (Simpson, Biel, Alba, all of them). She wants to throw a “sip and see” for her new boyfriend. What? Is she dating an infant?

Phaedra goes to a tea shop and meets Cynthia there. While they’d had an altercation last season, Phaedra says she’s going to let bygones be bygones because that’s what I good Christian woman does. I’m eating dinner late and I choke on my spaghetti. Phaedra asks what’s up with Peter and Cynthia gets cagey. Phaedra says everyone attacked her when she was down about Apollo. Not down with, about. Cynthia says she’s sorry for her part in anything. In her individual interview, Phaedra says she’s committed to supporting Cynthia, but she’s not going to forget the things she said.

Sheree is showing Kandi her clothing operation. Sheree asks what’s up with Kenya. Kandi says Kenya took some getting used to, but she’s okay with Kenya now. They move on to talking about Cynthia and Peter and the sunglasses event.

Kim says she loves being a wife and mother, and queen of her castle. She says red carpet stuff was never a big deal to her and she didn’t even show up if she wasn’t in the film. She’s also launching a maternity line. She’s setting up an intro to her website. After a few thousand takes, she hears the kids upstairs and has to take a break, and then gets it down.

Todd and Kandi get together with Kandi’s employees and a plate of bacon to discuss future plans. Kandi talks about opening a restaurant. The closing of the building is close to her due date, so she says she’ll have to depend on Todd to deal with a lot of it. Then they discuss the baby shower, because rich people who can afford baby stuff always have one for every kid. Todd wants to know if Phaedra is coming because she owes him money for working on the video that never happened.

Thank God Porsha abandons the idea of a sip and see, and is having a going away party for her football playing boyfriend, doubling as an introduction party. Her sister Lauren is pregnant, and when she says she’s 13 weeks, Porsha needs to be told how many months that is because she never passed third grade.

Apparently Porsha hasn’t known this guy too long and is already married to him in her head. Everyone gathers for the party. Kandi says she and Phaedra need to deal with their issues, but in the meantime, they’re being cordial. Entrée Duke, the new boyfriend. Everything is football themed, including Porsha. If Duke Williams and 27 mean something to you, then you know who this guy is. Cynthia says Porsha should follow her heart, but take your brain with her. I guess she assumes Porsha has a brain, but so far there hasn’t been much evidence.

Oooh, there has been tabloid fodder about Duke hooking up with a transvestite prostitute. These two seem to be planning to move in together, which sounds like a terrible idea. Porsha takes a mic and starts blabbing about how great they are together and that she’s making him her trophy man and hands him an award. (“Dude looks scared,” Kandi says when Porsha starts talking. Ha-ha!)

Phaedra gets together with Kandi at her office lounge. Kandi says they have to talk to get their friendship back to the way it was. She says that Phaedra acted all nice to her face, but it was a different story behind her back. We flash to Phaedra talking about Kandi to Nene. Phaedra says she heard from a third party that Todd and Kandi were hanging on to Apollo’s motorcycle, and the government was coming after her to seize his assets. This sounds like an excuse. Phaedra also didn’t like that Kandi said Apollo should see his kids. She says he’s in Kentucky, and it’s an expensive hassle. Kandi brings up Phaedra still owing Todd 8 grand for the video. What this sounds like is the both of them have been talking to other people when they should have been talking to one another, the balance weighing more heavily on Phaedra. Phaedra says she couldn’t help the way she felt, and Kandi says just talk to her next time. Phaedra promises to talk to Todd as well. Hugs happen.

Kandi’s assistant asks if World War IV is over. He’s not buying Phaedra’s sincerity. Me neither really.

The Walking Dead

I came in late. Daryl has been captured by a band of not so merry men. Actually a guy and two girls. They go to a fenced in area where zombies are wandering around what look like gas tanks. Daryl gets away, taking a duffel bag, and runs into the woods. He gets free of his bonds, radios Abe and Sasha, and narrowly misses getting eaten by a zombie while trying to get his crossbow out of the duffle bag.

Either the car broke down or they’re taking a break. Sasha and Abe enter a building. Abe sees a garment bag with a dress uniform in it. Sasha is sitting in the reception area of an office, where a zombie is scratching at the locked glass doors. Why they don’t put this poor thing out of its misery, I don’t know. The last place I’d want to be a zombie is in an office. I already put in my time being a zombie there. Abe wants to name him. Sasha gives Abe a speech about being accountable for choices. It sounds like she’s telling him he hasn’t made some good ones.

Daryl doubles back with his crossbow and takes the gun from the guy who was holding him hostage. He also takes a carving the guy had in his pocket. I have no idea why. He throws the duffel bag at them, which I guess has supplies. Daryl hides behind a tree and a huge truck comes in. They demand whatever supplies the people have. They say they earned them and the truck guy says rules are rules. One of the women says the rules are crap. After the truck guys take the duffel bag, Daryl gathers up the people and they hide.

One of the truck guys comes looking for them and gets a bite to the arm from a zombie for his trouble. He kills the zombie and truck guy #2 comes along and chops off his arm. Very efficient. The truck guys leave and the guy who kidnapped Daryl asks why Daryl came back after what they did to him.

While Abe is wandering around, he sees a zombie stuck on a pole off of a bridge, flailing around. Abe opens a nearby car trunk to find weapons and cigars. Wonder what the Bureau of Tobacco and Firearms would think about that. For whatever idiotic reason, he taunts the zombie up close. It’s a military guy and I think Abe has issues with this. He lights up a cigar and watches as the zombie’s movements finally cause him to fall, leaving the RPG strapped to him behind.

Abe returns to Sasha. He says they have everything they need there. He says he likes the way she calls him on his BS and wants to get to know her better. She says he has some stuff to take care of and he agrees. Yeah, maybe they want to take care of that zombie that’s staring at them from behind the glass.

Daryl and company come across a burned down house. For whatever reason (there are a lot of unanswered questions in this one), one of the girls says it’s their fault this happened. She enters what’s left of the house and is about to put flowers the two dead bodies. Already you know what’s going to happen here. She gets bitten and the next thing you know, a grave is being dug. Daryl asks the guy Rick’s usual questions – how many walkers have you killed and how many people have you killed? The guy says none because then there’s no going back. Daryl then invites them back to Alexandria. He wants to find his bike and then get Sasha and Abe to bring them back. Oh, man. Dude pulls a gun on him again and asks for the crossbow. No good deed goes unpunished. The couple steal his bike and throw him a knife. The woman says “Sorry,” and Daryl says, “Gonna be.” Well, if anyone can make it in the zombie infested wilderness, it’s Daryl.

Daryl almost immediately finds a fuel truck. What did I say? He picks up Sasha and Abe, who is now wearing a dress military blazer. Daryl tries to radio Rick. We hear the word “help” come through.

Nov9

November 8, 2015 – Once Upon the Dead in Atlanta

Posted on November 9, 2015 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

Once Upon A Time

Dark Emma brings the dagger to the rest of Excalibur. Rumpelstiltskin pops out, acting all merry, and puts some fairy dust or whatever on the sword.

Merlin is running through a desert with some guy and they see a chalice with water in it. The guy is like, I’ll go first because I’m thirstier than you, but when he touches it, he disappears, poof! in a cloud of smoke. Merlin is more humble in his approach and is able to quench his thirst. Everything around him turns green and he knows the chalice is the magical Holy Grail.

In Storybrooke, everyone is hanging out at the diner in Medieval wear. Merlin asks them to get the sword. He says blah-blah-blah about love and suddenly we’re back 200 years ago. A girl is there to see him. Her name is Nimue, and she’s seeking revenge on an evil being who ransacked her town. She’d seen him coming and she ran. She’s brought some seeds and says her best revenge would be to plant some flowers that grow only in her town, and for the flowers to live on. This is the stupidest revenge plot I’ve ever heard of. She plants the seeds in a container, Merlin goes bibbidy-bobbidy-boo and the flowers spring up.

Nowadays Merlin tells Emma they need some kind of spark and he wants her to help him get it. This isn’t a euphemism for anything. They really need to hunt down a literal spark. He says he sees two paths for their journey, in one she resists darkness and they’re successful; in the other, she succumbs to darkness and he dies.

There’s some mushy stuff between Emma and Hook, but I miss most of it because I was out of the room. I guess Nimue stuck around because Merlin is telling her all about how he found the Holy Grail. Any mention of holy and grail in the same sentence always makes me think of Monty Python, and ever since the Camelotites landed, I’ve been waiting for the Knights Who Say Ni to show up. Merlin wants to refashion the grail into a sword. Nimue is impressed that he doesn’t want to use the grail for his own gain, so Merlin makes a ring out of a leaf for her. Okay, all this magic and a Holy Grail and everything, and he gives her a ring made out of a leaf? Cheapskate.

Back in the diner, Zelena offers a trade. She knows how to get to the sword if she can have her magic back. She leads them to a crypt. Or it could be a fancy root cellar. Regina says if they get in and out with the sword, they’ll talk about the magic thing.

Arthur is stirring a cauldron and acting like a paranoid weirdo. He pours something from the cauldron over a helmet and it dissolves. He tells his lackeys to go pour it over everyone. Nice. If I were Gwinivere, I’d be looking for the nearest exit.

Merlin asks Emma if she’s embraced her powers and she says she’s done some dark things lately. But she figures if she’s questioning it, she must still have a conscience.

Merlin and Nimue go back to where her village was. He thinks she has survivor’s remorse, but she says she’s just angry. She says if she had his magic, she’d be all over the place doling out vigilante justice. Whoa. What happened to planting the flowers being enough? Merlin sees someone bad headed for his village and Nimue tells him to just hit the bad dude with a lightning bolt. He says he can’t because darkness might overtake him. What’s the point in having magic if you can’t zap people once in a while? For the greater good of course.

Zelena ugly cries about her sister being the favorite and how she’s worried about her baby. Enough to cause Snow concern, but once she gets close, Zelena kicks her across the lawn and escapes.

Merlin takes the grail to a fireplace in the middle of the woods. The fire consumes the grail, Merlin goes hocus pocus and it turns into Excalibur. Some creepy dude comes up behind them and wants the sword. Creepy Dude grabs Nimue and stabs her. She dies in Merlin’s arms.

Merlin tells Emma that Creepy Dude stole the flame that consumed the grail. She’s supposed to take the dagger and ask to communicate with the first dark one. The ancient dark one pops in and it’s not a dude, it’s a dudette. It’s Nimue! Back in the day while Creepy Dude is yapping at Merlin, Nimue (not really dead) steals his heart. (That phrase is always meant literally when used in regard to this show.) Oooh, she crushes it to dust. All righty then. She turns into the first dark one and breaks the sword.

Nimue is like, cool, the first and most recent dark ones, together on stage for the first time. Nimue zaps Merlin. She says any threat must be destroyed and that includes him. She tells Emma she has to kill Merlin. Emma is like no way, and uses the dagger to get the better of Nimue, who says she’ll always be inside Emma & disappears, poof! No smoke though. Merlin explains to Emma that he was able to put the sword in the stone and Nimue’s soul in the dagger.

Regina and the gang head to the round table, where Arthur is messing around with the sword. Regina puts him in freeze frame and says to get the sword. David is worried about a protection spell, but Regina says Arthur has no magic. Cue Zelena, who has Snow captive. Arthur uses the sword to summon Merlin. Merlin and Arthur have a pissing contest with words. Merlin tells Arthur the future is in his hands and to hand over the sword so they can use it for good. Arthur is like nuh-uh, and makes everyone else leave.

Nimue has hooked up with Rumpel, and they encourage Dark Emma to put the sword back together. There is a crowd of minions chanting. Not those little yellow guys, but creepy hooded figures. Dark Emma gets the sword back together using magic chewing gum., but she hears Merlin’s voice telling her not to do it back when she was a little girl. The minions tell her to take the power. She looks the sword over.

Oh good, next week Merida’s back. I’ve never seen Brave, but I kind of missed her.

The Walking Dead

Deanna climbs to a rooftop and watches the Alexandria clean up. She seems pretty freaked out, probably because she really didn’t know the first thing about being a post-apocalyptic leader. She sees Rick running toward the gate with loads and loads of zombies behind him. How she gets to street level as fast as she does, I will never know. Is this a daydream?

Nope. Rick is inside and already giving a lecture. He always has to scold everyone before he gives instructions. He says the others on the quarry mission know what they’re doing and the Alexandrians have to do their part and keep real freaking quiet so the zombies go away. Aaron goes on all about how Rick is a loser, then admits that he – Aaron, not Rick — is the jerk who led the Wolfs to Alexandria. I have no idea what he’s trying to say here. They’re all screw ups?

Jessie is digging graves when Rick tells her they don’t bury killers inside the walls. So they’ll just leave the bodies sit and stink until the zombies finally go away? Not a plan.

A small crowd is gathered by the food supply area. They don’t want to ration because they figure they’re dead anyway. They want to whoop it up on those canned peaches and green beans. Spencer gives them a what-do-you-think-you’re-doing? talk, and makes it okay again.

A few of the Alexandrians are making a memorial wall. Aaron sees Glenn’s name on it, and sees Maggie off and running. She’s gearing up for a rescue mission and Aaron says he’s going to help.

Deanna is pondering her wedding ring. She starts making a plan for a garden and some expansion, but maybe there’s more to it than that. Upstairs, she hears Spencer break a glass. He’s been hitting a bottle of liquor he swiped from the pantry, saying that he deserves it after stopping a run on the food. He blames Deanna for the position they’re in, saying she didn’t know what she was doing and made them into wimps.

Carl asks Ron if he’s seen Enid. He wants Ron’s help to climb over the wall and go find her. Ron says that he told her not to go out there, and he’s not going to let Carl go. I have to agree that now is probably not the best time with 10,000 zombies out there. Carl punches Ron out, but Ron says nyah-nyah, he’s going to tell.

Jessie goes to the door of a house and a zombie scares the ever-lovin’ hell out of all of us. She opens the door and stabs it in the eye. She tells the small group who has gathered, that this is the way it goes now and if they don’t fight, they die. The new normal.

Aaron shows Maggie a way to go under the wall. They go through a sewer tunnel and a couple of sewage zombies come out of nowhere. One almost eats Maggie and Aaron dispatches them. Maggie tells him he should go back because a cut on his head needs stitches, but he’s all like, it’s nothing, pay no attention to that blood dripping down my face.

Shrink turned medical doctor, Denise, is trying to help a bite victim. She has a eureka-I-found-it moment.

Rick can’t get ahold of any of the others who were on the quarry mission. Ron tells Rick about stopping Carl from leaving. Rick wants to check on Carl, and Ron says he’ll watch for the others while Rick is gone. He also wants to learn to shoot and RIck hands him a gun and says, practice now.

Tara asks how the bitten guy is and Denise responds by giving her a big kiss on the mouth, singing It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine), and saying it sucks. I have no clue what the kiss was all about, if anything, I have even less of a clue about what happened in the infirmary.

Maggie and Aaron get to the end of the pipe where there’s a gate. There are zombies outside, and Aaron wants to chance it, but Maggie makes a stink, drawing the zombies’ attention. She says it’s over and that if she’d gone with Glenn, she might have been able to save him; but if he was alive, she thinks he would have let her know by now. Really? How? I believe he’s dead, but for argument’s sake, if he wasn’t, how is he supposed to call?

Amy’s son, Sam, won’t come downstairs for cookies, so something is definitely wrong. He says that the world didn’t change upstairs. That’s a very poignant point.

Deanna is on her way somewhere with tray of glass bottles, gets a zombie surprise and drops the tray. Picking up a broken bottle, she attacks the zombie like a contestant on Bad Girls Club. Rick comes along and tells her she can stop now and she says she wants to live and learn how to cut a zombie bitch.

Maggie takes Glenn’s name off the wall. Aaron tells her that Aaron can be a girl’s name too, depending on how it’s spelled. Apparently, Maggie is pregnant, but I blinked and missed that part. Spencer gets props for something brave he did and contemplates his new bad assness. Rick says something to Jessie about not wanting to bury the bodies because the others are still out there somewhere and I don’t get the connection. He and Jessie get romantic and I gag.

Deanna is getting awfully close to the fence and taunting the zombies. Bad zombies!

We end with seeing blood dripping down on the inside of one of the walls.

Do the actors on this show go home all depressed or do they just head straight for the bar?

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Kandi is pregnant. Excitement abounds for the Burusses!

Portia comes by to visit Phaedra, and they’re both wearing outfits from the late 70s. Phaedra says they’re bestest friends now because Portia has been “a rock” for her. More like Portia has rocks in her head and we’ll see how long this lasts. Phaedra says she and Apollo are “cordial,” which I assume means she’s going to divorce him any minute now. Portia is dating a 24-year-old, which is about 10 years older than her age mentally, but there are laws to consider.

Cynthia says since the new opening of whatever venture Peter is getting into now, they only spend 3 days a week together. That’s 3 days a week more than I’d want to spend with him. Some kind of inappropriate something from Peter comes through on Phaedra’s phone.

It’s a video of Peter copping a feel that’s making the rounds. Cynthia tells Peter he’s embarrassing her and he doesn’t care. Did she really think he would? He’s saying it’s not what it looks like (ugh! thanks for being cliché) and tries to end the conversation, but Cynthia isn’t having it. She tells him he needs to think about what he’s done and puts him in time out with a bottle of wine.

Portia’s new squeeze, Duke, has flown in from Buffalo where he plays football. Portia says he’s really into her and wants to get to know her. If she wants to keep him, she probably shouldn’t let that happen. She feeds him chocolate covered strawberries and it’s one of the least romantic things I’ve ever seen. She wants him to meet her parents. Let’s just review, shall we? This is the same woman whose grandfather was a big name in the Civil Rights Movement, but thought the Underground Railroad was a real train. Unless you want to spend endless time pampering a pseudo princess who has no IQ whatsoever, Portia is not for you.

Commercial break. Brooks Ayers interview by Andy. Thursday at 9. Be there or be square. Unless, unlike me, you have a life.

Kenya is showing Cynthia her new home in Atlanta. Sheree Whitfield (is she still using that last name?) is one of her neighbors and back on the show. They drive past her house, which looks like an amazing little castle, but not quite finished. Kenya’s house looks like some kind of dilapidated fortress. She got it at foreclosure and it needs a lot of work. The property is gorgeous though. The Million Dollar Listing guys would definitely call this a tear down. What happened to Gone with the Wind fabulous?

Phaedra says Apollo has a lot of time to get on her nerves – even from prison. Ha-ha! I’ll bet. Kandi and Todd have been storing his stuff. Todd says that Apollo claims to have not seen the kids since he went into the slammer, which isn’t how Phaedra has been presenting things. My guess is that Phaedra makes it up as she goes along. Something is so off about her. She was supposed to release a workout DVD that Todd produced, and so far, no DVD and no paycheck either. Todd wants Kandi to discuss it with her and neither Kandi nor I think that’s appropriate.

Phaedra’s mother kisses her angel daughter’s behind and says everything’s good because it’s peaceful without jerkface Apollo. Mom is pushing her to get a divorce. I don’t know why she hasn’t gotten one already. She checked out of that marriage the second she knew he was going to prison.

Cynthia has a new eyewear line going on, and Portia is hoping to score free shades. She says she likes when a woman has a business to focus on because then she’s not in your business. That’s actually pretty clever, so I figure she read it on a cereal box. Phaedra calls the group “the shady bunch.” I’d never accuse her of not being witty or lacking intelligence, but I’d never, ever trust her with anything.

That weird Marlo chick is there and hoping to score a free pair of sunglasses in every design. Kenya and Marlo are talking about Sheree’s unfinished house, which has been unfinished for 3 years. The neighbors are starting to complain. I laugh, thinking about how long it takes real estate projects to be completed where I live. That’s nothing.

Peter finally shows up. Blech. I just don’t like him. Kenya seems to think he has something on the side. I don’t know about that, but he definitely has himself on the side, and every other angle, since that’s all he cares about. He and Kenya exchange words about his guilty ways. The worst thing about him is how he gets so involved with the gossip like he’s one of the Wives, but I don’t see him holding a peach in the group shots. He also tends to get right in their faces, which is not cool for a man to do.

Everyone’s wondering where Cynthia is, when she makes a grand entrance in a Cleopatra-type outfit and a pair of the glasses. I am a sunglasses freak and totally support this endeavor. Cynthia is looking for Peter (why?).

Sheree makes an appearance. She’s all good friends with Marlo, which makes Phaedra and I wonder what happened, since that wasn’t the case the last time they crossed paths. Kenya asks Sheree what’s up with her house, and tells her that the neighbors have been complaining about how long it’s taking to complete. Again, if that’s really the case, they should live here for a while. They go back and forth, and Cynthia is like, stop it, this night is about me. Sheree gets louder and starts attracting attention. Cynthia tells her, enough already….

And it’s to be continued.

Tootie arrives next week!

Nov2

November 1, 2015 — A Giant Bear, a Backstory & Vicki in the Hot Seat

Posted on November 2, 2015 by theresakp

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

Once Upon A Time

Lance and Merida are imprisoned, and Merlin takes David, Hook and Belle to free them. Merida says Arthur took her wisps and she needs them to save her brothers. Merlin says that her brothers will have to wait, as they have more urgent business.

In Storybrooke (that I’ve been spelling wrong), Belle suggests that instead of wasting time finding Merlin, they should ask Rumpelstiltskin for help. Rumpel is in the woods mooning over his teacup. He smashes it to get something to cut his rope bonds. Dark Emma and Merida see that he’s gone. Dark Emma tells Merida to kill Belle in order to get Rumpel to fight for something. I’m not sure how that’s supposed to work, but okay.

In the parallel world, Merida bops Belle in the head to get her to help with some magic. Belle says that she could have just asked, and Merida says she’s a bop you in the head first and ask questions later kind of lass. They go to a cute witch’s cabin when the witch is out at the mall or something, and borrow the use of her cauldron. Merida sees her brothers. They are about to be executed because Merida won’t marry some guy.

In Storybrooke, Belle finds Rumpel hiding. He tells her that if it wasn’t for her, he wouldn’t even be alive. I’m not sure if he’s talking about the teacup or something else. He tells Belle that Dark Emma is after her because she wants Rumpel to defend her.

Wicked Witch, Zelena, has also been imprisoned, in a hospital by Regina. She’s reading What to Expect When You’re Expecting, because she is. A nurse brings her a tray with food. Zelena is hoping for onion rings, but the nurse says she’s only supposed to have locally grown produce and shows her a yummy plate of broccoli and carrots. She tells the nurse to take a hike. Dark Emma pops in and spirits Zelena away and gives her onion rings. Zelena asks what Dark Emma wants. Emma wants her help in exchange for her freedom. Zelena says forget you and disappears poof! in a cloud of smoke. I don’t know if she took herself back to the hospital or somewhere else.

Belle tells Rumpel to forget about the stupid teacup, and that she’s always seen that he’s a hero underneath. They go to Mr. Gold’s (nee Rumpel’s) shop and Merida shows up. She says she couldn’t resist Emma and now Belle’s fate rests in Rumpel’s hands.

Parallel world Merida says her father taught her everything she knows and that if she remembers what she’s fighting for, she’ll never miss her target. She’s given Belle a recipe for a potion to change her (Merida) into a bear, so that she can fight the clan who has her brothers.

Storybrooke Arthur says he’ll help Regina get Merlin back, but he has to be alone with the magic mushroom to do it. (That’s what they all say.) The second he’s by himself, he throws it into the fire. I didn’t think he was really there to help. He tells them some story to cover up what he did.

Merida is about to shoot Belle with an arrow, and tells Rumpel to be the man they need. He says, sorry he can’t, and while Merida is taking aim, Belle pulls the rug out from under her. Literally.

Parallel Merida tells Belle that her father died because of her. She tried to protect him and missed the target. She says the clans lost faith in her. They didn’t believe she could rule alone and wanted her to marry. Belle gives her the bear potion.

Rumpel and Belle drive out of Storybrooke. Belle tells him running never made anyone a hero and makes him stop the car. He tells her about how he injured himself to avoid combat, that he’s a coward and it’s not going to change. She walks away back toward Storybrooke and runs right into Merida. Merida says Dark Emma isn’t taking chances and is making her drink the bear potion. She turns into a bear the size of the Empire State Building.

Just has the clans are celebrating their victory in capturing Merida’s brothers, Merida shows up and drinks the bear potion. Nothing happens and Belle tells her that she switched bottles because Merida needs to defend herself as their queen, otherwise they’ll never respect her. Just as arrows are let fly toward her brothers, Merida shoots her own arrows that stop theirs. The clans are so impressed they kneel before their queen and release her brothers. She tells the dude who wanted to marry her that he’s lucky she knows the meaning of mercy.

The gigantic bear chases Belle through the woods. This thing is freaking massive and she tumbles down a cliff. Belle and the bear are face to face, and Rumpel shows up. Belle tells him to run, but he says he’s not running this time. The bear cracks him one and he goes flying. He tells the bear to do her worst, and then throws a bag of magic whatever in her mouth and the bear changes back to Merida. Belle asks how he knew it would work and he says he didn’t. Mushy stuff with Belle and Rumpel, while Merida lies there on the ground feeling like an idiot.

Merida thanks parallel Belle for helping her get her kingdom back, and Belle leaves to go to Rumpel.

Storeybrooke Merlin tells Emma that he’s always wanted to try a certain candy bar, and Emma remembers him being an usher in a movie theater where she saw The Sword in the Stone as a girl. He had told her that one day she’d be in a position to remove Excalibur, but he tells her now not to do it.

Rumpel wants to make a deal with Dark Emma. He says he’ll remove Excalibur if she gives Merida her heart back. After balking for 5 seconds, Dark Emma puts Merida’s heart back where it belongs. Rumpel tells Belle that if things don’t work out, he’s sorry for everything. He removes Excalibur and cuts off Dark Emma’s head. Just kidding. He says a deal’s a deal, and gives her the sword. He tells Dark Emma that she’s made a mistake in turning him into a hero. She says Storybrooke is loaded with heroes and none of them have been able to stop her. He says that’s because none of them are him.

David finds the burned mushroom and says they obviously can’t trust Arthur. Regina says Henry can help them since he’s the author of the story. Henry puts the mushroom into a bubbling cauldron, and Hologram Merlin rises out of it. He starts telling them something, but then says the dark one has found him and disappears.

The Walking Dead

We begin with Morgan talking to someone we don’t see. He says they’ve wanted everything from him and he’s going to give it to them. The word “Then” is shown and Morgan is in what looks like some kind of cell with a blackboard. He’s yelling at someone while a lantern on the floor looks like it’s going to burn the place down. This is a confusing episode start, but they like to do that.

Now Morgan is in the woods picking off some zombies. He puts them in a pile, covers them with dried leaves and sets them on fire. Way to start a forest fire. Where is Smokey the Bear when you need him? Oops! One of those zombies wasn’t quite dead and gives a whole new meaning to the term burning man festival. Satisfied with his day’s work, Morgan has a beer.

Two guys who are not zombies come running through the woods. Morgan gets one in the throat with a sharpened stick and strangles the other. He burns them too. I have no clue what’s going on here, except that Morgan is a firebug.

Morgan is talking to himself, saying, “You know what it is,” and does some clumsy ballet moves with the stick. He sees a house with a goat tied out front. He’s about to steal the goat when a voice tells him to leave the goat alone. The voice tells him to put the gun down and come inside for some falafel. I’m not even making that up. He comes closer to the cabin and the voice tells him it’s his last chance to put the gun down. When he doesn’t, he gets whacked in the head from behind by a guy who looks like Friar Tuck.

Morgan comes to in a cell. There’s a lot of that going around. The friar has changed into work clothes, and tells Morgan he should be more careful. Morgan yells “Kill me,” a couple of times. He tosses Morgan a book on The Art of Peace. The watch goat sounds an alarm and the guy runs out and intercepts a zombie. He gives Morgan some food.

The next day, he tells Morgan his name is Eastman and that he rehabilitated prisoners before the apocalypse. He asks Morgan what he does or did. Morgan says kill anyone who gets near him. Nice. When Eastman is out on his morning constitutional, Morgan works the zipper pull of his jacket and tries cutting around one of the window bars. When Eastman comes back in, he says he believes Morgan must be suffering from PTSD. Morgan tells him about killing the two guys. Eastman asks if Morgan has saved anyone. He says he saw a wedding ring, so Morgan must have had someone in his life. He supposes Morgan saw them get zombiefied. Morgan says he has to kill him because he was born to “clear,” whatever that means. Eastman says that he’s only met one truly evil person, that it’s usually some kind of trauma that causes people to do bad things. It turns out the cell door was open the whole time. I’m sure this is all very philosophical and Morgan wrecked his jacket for nothing. Eastman tells him he can go or stay, but he won’t allow Morgan to kill him. Morgan opens the cell door, acts like he’s leaving and then attacks Eastman with his stick.

Eastman gets the better of him, but then Morgan gets the better of Eastman. It reverses again, but in the end Eastman pins Morgan to the ground until he gets ahold of himself, like you would with a kid having a tantrum. Morgan asks Eastman to kill him again, which is getting old, but Eastman says he gave Morgan two choices and that wasn’t one of them. Morgan goes back to the cell and closes the door. Eastman opens it and Morgan kicks it shut again.

Later, Eastman tells him that it was aikido he was using to kick Morgan’s ass. He tells Morgan about how his daughter found him crying in the garage after work. She gave him her rabbit’s foot and told him it will make things better. He discovered aikido the next day. Eastman says they’re going on a trip. He has no idea where, but he doesn’t want to go by himself.

Eastman is also on a mission to learn how to make goat cheese. He tells Morgan he has a lot of supplies, but wants to scavenge some things for the trip. He asks Morgan to watch the goat while he’s gone. I swear, if Morgan touches that goat, I’ll kill him myself. He picks up the book and reads that the basic creed of aikido is to not kill, even if it’s the most evil person. He hears the goat making warning sounds and knocks off a couple of zombies.

I hope his attitude changes by the end of this episode, because he’s annoying the crap out of me. He finds a makeshift graveyard and is burying the zombies when Eastman comes back. Eastman thanks him for saving the goat and checks the zombies’ pockets for ID so that he can make grave markers. I am having such a bad feeling here that this is going to end in some depressing way.

Commercial break. The Talking Dead is having 2 surprise cast members tonight. That’s not good.

Eastman wants to teach Morgan aikido. He says you’re to care about the welfare of your opponent and that all life is precious, not just yours. Morgan gets aikido lessons and reads the book. At dinner, Morgan asks what’s up with the cell in his living room. Eastman tells him that back in the day, he interviewed prisoners up for parole and there was a guy who said and did all the right things, but he could see the guy was a psychopath. The prisoner discovered that he knew, dropped the facade and was going to kill Eastman because he knew Eastman would make sure he’d never get out of prison. I would say that’s not the best solution, but he got out anyway and killed Eastman’s family. (Here I would say this is pretty far-fetched, but I was friends with Richie Adan who was murdered by Jack Henry Abbott after Norman Mailer had helped him get released.) Eastman built the cell because he was going to put this guy in it, but he came to believe all life is precious. I just know this episode is going to break my heart somehow.

Eastman asks Morgan who he lost and what were their names. Morgan wants to have a pity party, but Eastman says no, we’re doing some aikido instead. While they’re doing a drill, a zombie comes out of the woods. It’s one of the guys Morgan killed and Morgan becomes paralyzed. Eastman intervenes and gets bitten. My prediction was correct. Morgan is furious. Eastman says let’s go home, that Morgan “made it out,” and can’t go back. They fight with the aikido sticks and once again Morgan goes back to the “kill me” business.

Commercial break. An “episode” of Fear 462. One of the characters used to be on All My Children a really long time ago. So long, I don’t remember what her name is or her character’s name. Julie rings a bell, but I’m not positive.

This is just dismal now. Morgan is on a hunt for zombies in the woods. He kills one and there are two hikers that had been frozen in their tracks. The girl takes a can of beans and a bullet out of her bag, puts them down as an offering to Morgan and says, thank you. I’m glad he didn’t kill them.

Oh my heart. I can’t take this. Morgan comes home to find the goat being eaten by a zombie. Eastman is a beat behind him and says she must have figured out the door wasn’t locked and gotten out. I want to cry.

Eastman finishes the story about the prisoner. He did accomplish his mission and when the prisoner was eventually released, he kidnapped him. He put him in the cell and let him starve to death. It took 47 days. He says he was like Morgan was, but it gave him no peace. He found peace when he decided to never kill anything again. I guess this cabin is pretty remote, because when he went to turn himself in, he found out about the apocalypse.

Eastman isn’t looking too good. He says he’s ready to go and he has a gun locked away. He gives Morgan his rabbit’s foot and says he hopes it’s lucky for Morgan too. This whole thing is very painful and I’m glad they’re not showing the suicide. Morgan is truly alone once again.

Morgan leaves the cabin, walking past Eastman’s grave marker. He sees the sign and map for Terminus, smiles, and heads down the train tracks. And we all know how that ended up.

We’re back to now, and Morgan is with a Wolf that he’d abducted, to whom he’d been telling the story. The Wolf asks if Morgan thinks there’s hope for him and Morgan says yes. The Wolf shows Morgan that he has a bite mark. He says he knows he’s probably going die, that if he doesn’t, he’ll have to kill everyone there. All righty then.

Morgan leaves and locks the door. And I still don’t know what was going on with that fire in the beginning.

The Real Housewives of the OC – Reunion Part 3

I love Heather’s dress and earrings! We dive right into the Brooks thing, even showing an ancient clip with an ex-Housewife Laurie. Tamra tells some old story too. Shannon asks if Vicki thinks Brooks really has cancer and she says yes. Briana says early on, Brooks had said he had pancreatic cancer, but it was really pancreatitis.

They cut to a one-on-one interview by Andy with Brooks, who “couldn’t be there.” I’ll bet. I wouldn’t want to be there either with that bunch of women ganging up on me. He talks about the Newport Imaging PET scan. Brooks says that he went to Hogue for the test, but his oncologist practices at both places and the results were dictated at Newport. Andy brings up the pancreatitis thing. He says he never talked to Briana directly about it, that it was Vicki who passed along the wrong info. Briana makes a bunch of faces in a little box in the corner of the screen.

Vicki says she doesn’t have proof if he has cancer or not and everyone yells at her for “protecting” Brooks. Shannon says she has proof. She took a screen shot of the report and compared it with a test she had taken there. She whips out a copy of one of their reports and gives us all kinds of information about how they do stuff there. She says the mess that his report was isn’t even comparable. Vicki heaves a huge sigh. Back at the Brooks interview, Andy points out the inconsistencies between what Vicki and Brooks have said. Brooks says she misspeaks quite a bit. Andy asks if he has anything to say to Meghan, and he says F-off. Now tell us how you really feel. Andy asks why he doesn’t show Heather’s husband Terry the report, and he says he wishes he had and that he will. Heather says it hasn’t happened yet. Vicki admits to fabricating a story about Terry’s involvement because she wanted people to have compassion. The women go nuts on her and at least Andy comes to her defense for telling the truth.

Andy says Meghan went to great lengths to disprove Brooks’s cancer. Meghan starts crying about the dinner party where Vicki went off on her and her husband’s ex-wife just dying from cancer. Vicki says she still believes Brooks has cancer and she had even gone to chemo with him once. Heather says Vicki is too smart for this and Tamra asks what does Brooks have on her to make her lie? Andy asks if Vicki is scared of Brooks and she kind of nods. She says he was more verbally abusive. Briana says that she’s seem him be physically abusive. She says she saw Brooks shake Vicki and it was in front of a room full of people, so what does he do behind closed doors? I’m wondering why nobody in that room full of people, including Briana, say something?

Vicki says that no one seemed to care when Brooks was diagnosed, and Shannon gets pretty upset. We flash back to just about every interaction with Shannon and Vicki last season. We also see the bit where Tamra said Vicki might be going to hell for lying. All the women agree. I wonder where on earth the Christians in the bunch get this stuff, and consider writing to Tamra’s “pasture” again.

Shannon goes nuts, talking about how she was loyal to Vicki. Vicki talks about her mother passing away and Meghan idiotically says that shouldn’t affect the other areas of her life. Vicki admits that her gut reaction is that Brooks doesn’t have cancer. Andy says Vicki seems disconnected and outs Vicki for taking some Xanax. Geez, nothing is sacred. She says nobody wants to feel duped, and she feels sad, but relieved to not be with him any longer. However, she sticks with the fact that she never had definitive proof that he does or doesn’t have cancer. Briana talks about how she’s been back home and has her old room back. There’s something about her that I just don’t like. Maybe it’s that she claims to be so independent, yet I get the feeling she’s very dependent.They take a break and Tamra, Briana and Vicki discuss the whole thing. Tamra says she’s heartbroken and wants the old Vicki back.

I think my problem with this bunch is, although they might be coming from a good place (I’m not so sure about Meghan – I think that one has a screw loose), they’re loud and relentless. They never once gave Vicki a break when her mother had just passed away. And yes, Meghan, something like that can affect other areas of your life. It was like they were torturing this poor woman instead of helping the situation. Honestly, sometimes they come off like they’ve had no life experience whatsoever, and certainly can’t seem to walk in anyone else’s shoes.

Awww, it’s our final moments of the reunion. Andy asks Meghan how her experience was, and I don’t care. He points out that Vicki copped to her culpability in the Brooks business, but says it wasn’t enough to satisfy the other wives. Shannon says blah-blah-blah about her marriage and that she’s disappointed in her friendship with Vicki. Tamra gets all choked up about being grateful and says she hopes her friendship with Vicki can be mended. Vicki says she’s not in a good place, that she’s sad, but she also feels refreshed.

Andy passes out fireball shots and I wish I’d had several while watching this.