Monthly Archives: October 2015

October 2, 2015 — Twice the GH & Zombie Plants

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

General Hospital – Thursday

Morgan tries to physically restrain Ava from taking Avery, but a cop shows up. Court order, dude. And Judge Judy doesn’t care about your feelings or what you think. Valerie makes up something to cover for what Lulu overheard.

Anna is recruiting Sam to help with the Sonny shooting since she knows it can’t be Carrrlos, and Nathan is discussing Ava with Paul. Apparently, Sloane has a first name, but I missed it and they’ll probably never repeat it again. Sam tries to argue the Carrrlos point, and Anna says she has “information” that it’s not him. That’s an understatement.

Some college kid that Dillon has hired to be a production assistant is filming a “behind the scenes” documentary. Like anyone would care about this film. Dillon sees Lulu instead of Maxie when they film the love scene. He spaces out and they take a break. Whoa. Maxie really looked half naked there.

Morgan continues to act like an idiot, but Sonny’s surgery is over, so it’s time to take the idiocy back to the hospital where they can upset the staff and patients. Patrick says that the embolism already did its damage by the time they got to it, but it’s too early to tell what the prognosis is (say that 3 times real fast).

Paul shows up at Ava’s. Ha-ha! Baby Avery is playing with Ava’s earrings again. Seriously, she’s going to have to switch to studs for a while. Paul says Anna is wise to the fact that Carrrlos didn’t shoot Sonny, but doesn’t exactly say why. They then move on to more important things, like Patrick’s proposal to Sam.

It’s funny how the characters on GH call it GH.

Valerie is such a jerk. Someone set her up with Morgan. Now he did it. Dillon said “Lulu” instead of Maxie’s character name in his film. He tells Maxie about his love for Lulu, who says she’ll keep it to herself, and gives him a mini pep talk. Oddly enough, Nathan is having the same conversaion with Valerie about Dante.

ROFL! Valerie shows up at Dillon’s set and he says “something came up,” so he sent everyone home for the day. No comment. Valerie kisses him because she can’t have Dante.

Yay! Looks like Franco is on next time.

General Hospital – Friday

Lulu says she’s staying home to oversee Dante. She doesn’t know the half of it.

My favorites! Franco and Nina! Kiki is apparently trying to sell Silas’s old place and they walk in when the realtor is going on about how she should lower the price because a murder was committed there and it will be hard to sell. Really? Highly doubtful, especially in Port Charles where a murder is committed every other day.

Sam has created a romantic atmosphere in Patrick’s living room using many candles. You can tell these people don’t have pets. She holds up a “Yes, I’ll marry you sign.” Why doesn’t she just tell him?

The PA walks in on Dillon and Valerie making out. After he leaves, stupid Valerie spills the beans that she’s just been using Dillon and is in love with someone else. Dillon asks if it’s Dante. Dillon says it’s ok, he loves someone else too. Suddenly, Valerie is extremely smart and perceptive, and guesses that it’s Lulu. Valerie is also rocking a very nice tit-dyed trapeze top.

Honestly, I need some kind of family tree chart to keep who’s related to whom straight. Dante tells Lulu he’s worried about his brother, Morgan, but I think he’s worried about more than that. Lulu says it will all work out. I wasn’t crazy about this actress at first, but she’s grown on me and I like her.

Franco is worried about Kiki because she hasn’t returned his calls and she’s in her PJs is in the middle of the afternoon. She gives him a song and dance about having gotten a job in Japanese investments, so she works at night. I don’t believe it and I don’t think Franco does either.

Maxie is able to convince Nathan that nothing is going on between her and Dillon, but says she’ll have to keep what she and Dillon talked about to herself. Nathan isn’t thrilled with that, but says he has a secret too that he’s keeping to himself.

Hmm…Kiki says she has to get ready for work and Franco says they’ll wait and can all go out together. I’m guessing, unless she’s commuting to NYC, you would do that sort of job online.

Ugh! The “just one kiss” phrase is back. Dillon tells Valerie that the “spark” with Lulu is still there and she says ditto about Dante. This confuses me about their definition of spark. Whenever I’ve heard that word used in that context, it’s a reciprocal thing. Are they just sparking by themselves?  Valerie says at least Dillon didn’t act on his spark. Then Dillon says that phrase I’ve come to hate, and Valerie is all humana-humana. She’s going to tell him, isn’t she? What is wrong with these people that they can’t keep a damn thing to themselves? I’m guessing Maxie and Nathan are going to tell their secrets to each other too.

Nina wants to move in with Franco, but he’s hesitant because he’s broke. Nina isn’t and says she’d like to use the money for good, since so much bad has come from it. Lovey dovey stuff, which is okay with me because I really like them. Kiki shows back up, but IMO, still not dressed appropriately for a job in investments. I used to work in investments, but maybe things have changed or it’s casual Friday.

Ha-ha! Lulu is giving Dante a back massage and tells him to just think about nothing. That should be pretty easy for him. Dillon isn’t buying that Valerie and Dante just had…you know. O…M…G. Valerie just told him that she slept with Dante. Take my advice, people, if you want to keep something a secret, don’t tell everyone. I’d check her Facebook status if I could. If she really cared that much about him, I don’t think she’d be blabbing about this. Oooh, I wonder if she’ll end up pregnant. Now that she opened her big mouth, she’s worried because Dillon is friends with Lulu. She couldn’t have thought about that 3 minutes ago?

Oh wow! Their whole conversation was just filmed by the stray camera that got left on.

Obama hates me. Once again, they broke in at the last second. I don’t even know if that was the end of the show or what. Bush hated me too. It seems like whenever these guys have something to say, it’s always at the tail end of the show I’m watching. Heaving huge sigh. At least Z Nation is on tonight.

Z Nation

Weirdest. Greenhouse. Ever. When they said there were zombies in the z-weed, I thought they were ground up or something, but the zombies are part of the plants. (I’d also thought they said “seaweed.) It’s part zombie, part plant. It’s also kind of tough to harvest the seed pods, since everyone who goes in gets bit and turned into another zombie. There’s also a huge zombie plant that’s bigger and tougher than your normal zombie plant.

Murphy and Cassandra are at the lab where a scientist, who’s probably just a smart guy in a lab coat, is using various zombie parts for tests. Weirdest. Lab. Ever. Too. And that includes the one in The Brain That Wouldn’t Die. The dude realizes Murphy is Murphy.  Some woman volunteers to go in for the seed pods. She doesn’t make it too far before she’s being accosted by a zombie plant. Operation Bite Mark steps in and saves her. They’ve shown up looking for Murphy. She’s scratched up though, so I don’t know how good that is. She has a bond with a little girl who isn’t hers, but both of their families are dead. The girl isn’t doing so well; she has a fever of some kind.

The scientist came along after the place had been overrun by zombies. They had been working on a vaccine and found z-weed in the meantime, which turned out to be a lucrative endeavor. Via the notes left behind, the scientist believes the latest batch, #47, will be what they’re looking for. All of the previous batches have gone awry. Murphy goes with him into the greenhouse where he’s able to hypnotize the zombie plants.  This greenhouse is pretty creepy.

Citizen Z is learning Spanish on his iPad. Pup is okay! The woman harvester has a truck with a radio and Addy calls in. Citizen Z is using solar power and he’s losing the light, so they get cut off, but not before Addy tells Citizen Z that Murphy’s alive and he gives her the coordinates of the lab in California where they’re supposed to be taking him.

The first dose of batch 47 on a zombie head causes it to explode; the second, lower dosage does nothing; but the third gets the result they’re looking for – a cognizant zombie head. While OBM is discussing how they’re going to get Murphy back, he comes in behind them and tells them they don’t need to go to California, that the cure is right there, if they can only harvest it. Since bullets don’t kill plants, they bring garden tools. Doc takes the garden weasel.

Murphy has some kind of special connection to the plants and can feel what they do. He says all the zombie plants are interconnected and you can’t kill one without killing all of them. Murphy and Roberta will do the harvesting while Doc has déjà vu. The big ass zombie plant is part of batch 47 and gets really, really pissed when they pick his pods. And thus comes the ohshitohshitohshit moment of the night. Murphy gets entangled in the plant, Roberta cuts him free and all zombie plant hell breaks loose.

Running away from the greenhouse, Murphy runs into Dr. Kurian, whose search for immortality started the whole mess. Apparently, a cartel had funded him and is now after him. Oops! Here they are.

Hector, Escorpion to his friends, shows up with his posse.  He apparently buys z-weed on a regular basis. He’s not all that keen on the sideline of finding a cure, especially since they keep losing employees and it costs him money. He decides to test the last of the 47, using the scientist as a guinea pig and it doesn’t go well. He turns into a zombie and Hector shoots him. One of Hector’s henchmen drags in Dr. Kurian out from wherever he’s hiding and throws him in the car trunk.

Before they leave, the cartel guys are going to burn the place down. Murphy runs to save the zombie plants, who he claims have feelings, but only ends up entangled in the giant zombie plant, who doesn’t have as many feelings as Murphy thinks,and we get another free-for-all with OBM trying to save Murphy and themselves. The roots of the plant get entangled in an industrial fan and bye-bye giant zombie plant. Before they get the hell out of Dodge, Doc gives the little girl some plant leaves to chew, thinking it might help her. I’d like to think something might come of that later, but this was such an insignificant part of the plot, I’d be surprised if it did.

On their way out of town, OBM and Murphy see a blonde in the road. It turns out to be Serina, who was a Murphy groupie last season. She’s pregnant and guess who the daddy is?

Best quote of the night: “And to think we were worried about genetically modified tomatoes.” Murphy

Second best quote of the night: “Marijuana,  zombies & GMOs. What could go wrong?” Doc

September 30, 2015 — Farewell September — GH & Lots of LA

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

General Hospital

Running a little late. I come in to Morgan asking Ava not to fight for custody of her own daughter. At least she changed clothes. She’s now rocking a nice black and white body con dress, and another pair of cool earrings. I somehow think Morgan is the wrong guy to send on this mission.

Dillon is going to star in and direct his own film. Does he think he’s Clint Eastwood? Maxie practices the love scene with Nathan. Like this will help him be less jealous.

Dante needs to go back to detective school and/or math class.  He seems to have difficulty putting 2 and 2 together. He also seems to have difficulty not being chummy with Valerie.

Paul confronts Anna with the Carrrlos information and it’s fun watching her squirm. Anna says blah-blah-blah to Paul, trying to cover her tracks. I don’t think he’s buying it. She claims she had some other conflicts with Sloane and that’s why he’s trying to set her up. She says that it’s an unrequited love thing, and asks if Sloane had any proof. Paul makes a soap opera face.

Morgan admits to being a huge baby, hoping to win Ava over. Her consolation prize for handing Avery over will be him moving in. So instead of cleaning up after a real baby, she’ll get to clean up after a baby man. I don’t think this is a fair trade. Morgan asks if she “can’t do this one thing” for him. She tells him she’ll do anything for love, but she won’t do that. I don’t blame her. It’s not like he’s the ideal guy, especially when he’s in a manic phase. Did he get to that doctor yet? I’m thinking, no.

Even though Anna asked a really stupid question, Paul tells her that there’s no concrete proof. Anna tells Paul he shouldn’t waste his time with Sloane and he tells her that’s not a problem, since Sloane is dead. Ok, he didn’t add that last part, but he thought it in a flashback.

Dillon isn’t over Maxie and she catches him talking to himself about it. Uh-oh. Lulu just walked in on Valerie professing her love for Dante. This ought to lead to some questions.

Ava shows up to get Avery and we’re out.

Little Women LA

Tonya and Terra are planning Elena’s bachelorette weekend while discussing Brianna. It just so happens, at the exact same time in TV land, Brianna is visiting with Elena. Elena wants her at the party, even though the last time the ladies got together it didn’t go well.

Christy is out shopping with Autumn, her teenage daughter from a previous relationship. They both have surgeries coming up – Christy for her neck and Autumn for her legs. The leg surgery sounds like a nightmare. She’ll need to have her legs broken and reassembled. Autumn is concerned that if Christy gets pregnant, she won’t be able to look after her. This is a surprise to both Christy and me, since she’s never brought it up before. Kind of late in the game, since Christy and Todd have been trying to have a baby for two seasons.

Bikinis, booze and best friends are all Terra says you need for a great weekend. Sounds good to me. Elena is a little conservative and Terra thinks you can’t have a bachelorette party without penises and strippers. Um…I did.

The girls all go to Palm Springs, where they’ve rented a place. A gorgeous place. Brianna makes a good point in that when something bothers the other girls, they throw it at her rather than discussing it with her. Brianna has a secret too, something that’s stressing her out. Is she secretly married? Is she pregnant? What?

Elena springs the news that they’re going to have the vow renewal in Russia where she’s from. This doesn’t go over too big. Most people who have destination events don’t pick Russia. Although, it’s not as awful as you might think. When I was in high school, I took a trip there with some other Russian history students and we had a blast. And this was before the Iron Curtain came down. She’s just kidding, it’s going to be in Hawaii.

The girls get gussied up and go to a club called Toucan’s. Terra promised no strippers, but she didn’t promise there wouldn’t be drag queens. Elena gets pulled on stage to dance, but says she’s not drunk enough yet. So everyone does a shot. Now they’re all up and dancing. I’d totally get into going to this place. Back at the house and pool, Christy says she’s glad she’s sober when everyone is getting silly with a hot dog float. Brianna passes on the drinking and the pool party because she doesn’t want it to turn into a drunken brawl. Can I have her spot?

The next day they go to a humongous grocery store to get supplies for a barbeque. Jasmine tries to explain why Brianna is so upset, and that Brianna feels the others don’t really care about her. After all, they’re making this huge fuss over Elena, who’s married already, and aren’t even acknowledging Brianna’s engagement to Matt. Christy and Brianna have stayed behind and are having a confab. Brianna says she’s totally happy with Matt, and feels that she’s being attacked rather than supported. A few episodes ago, we’d found out that Matt sent nakey pics to another girl. Not that he deserves a prize for that, but they were broken up at the time, so I don’t get what the big deal is.

The ladies are boozing it up at home and playing some kind of truth game that involves a lot of sexual questions. ♫ La-la-la! ♫ Ok, I am really listening. Brittney starts weeping about her ex that cheated on her and is still calling her. I don’t think this is how you’re supposed to play this game. Time to eat.

Nice spread, but when is Brianna revealing that secret? Oh, that would be now. YES! I was right! She’s already married. I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!

Commercial break. They always tease me with these Lifetime movies that look so good. This time it’s the 90210 movie. Lifetime always sucks me in and then the movies end up sucking. Even when they’re good, the endings always suck.

In her individual interview segment, Terra wonders what else Brianna’s been keeping to herself, since this is so huge. Jasmine already knew, but she’s the only one who’s been supportive. Everyone else is either shocked and/or offended, but I don’t get why. They’ve never liked Matt and have been rather vocal about that. I might have done the same thing in her position. One on one, Elena tells Brianna that she doesn’t know what to say and that Brianna’s timing is atrocious. She might be right with that one, since it was supposed to be her weekend.

I can’t wait to see Elena’s “wedding” dress. They showed a glimpse on the preview and it looks amazing.

Million Dollar Listing LA

Josh A. is all impressed with a house by architect Wallace Neff, but it looks industrial to me and it’s probably one of the few houses I haven’t been that thrilled with. The sellers want a buyer who’s not going to tear it down. Um…it’s not Grey Gardens.

Commercial break. I cannot wait for The People’s Couch to return. It’s one of the funniest shows on TV. I’d also like to know how I can get on it.

After throwing the huge Burning Man party and generating a lot of interest, David and James can’t get back onto the property to show it to anyone. They finally track down the owner’s father, who tells them his son is in Russia. (Lots of Russia going on tonight.) He also informs them that if they can’t get full asking price, his son is going to move in to the house. What they figure that means is, he doesn’t really want to sell it and has disappeared for the duration. David and James gain access to the house, but the ridiculous price is a turn off to the buyers. The house is $9,995,000. I hate when it’s not a round number. It reminds me of how things are priced for $9.99, like I don’t round that to ten bucks in my head.

Josh F. is making a video about one of the properties he’s selling. He pretty much stinks as a narrator and I’m surprised. I understand that he might not want to detract from the video tour, but he could show just a little more enthusiasm. He’s having exclusive showings for brokers, but everyone shows up all at once, so it turns out to be a not so exclusive open house instead.

James gets a gold star in my book when he says he works hard, but his wife works ten times harder staying home with the kids. That’s right. Being a mother is a job and not an easy one. No vacations or sick days for at least the first 18 years either. That’s why I don’t have kids. They have a really cute house that’s surprisingly not very ostentatious.

Josh A. is showing the Neff house and some guy says it would be great for his son to play hide and seek in. Would he like to adopt an older child? One of the buyers (who will be tearing it down) offers half a million over asking price, but wants the deal done in two hours or the offer is withdrawn. This sounds so stupid, that I’m thinking it must be a set up by Bravo.

The sellers aren’t keen on the buyer being a developer. The guy also says he doesn’t like a gun being held to his head either. I’m with him on that. An architect lover has also made an offer, but this time it’s under asking. The sellers decide to go for the money. Good choice. Seriously, it’s not Grey Gardens.

What’s kind of amazing is how young these guys are and how they’ve been plugging away at this since they were 12, and now they’re skabillionaires. When I was their age, I didn’t know what was going on. Hell, I don’t know now.

Oh Lord, one of Josh F.’s buyers has a man bun. I hear that contributes to baldness. Good. Guys need to stop wearing those.

David is growing a beard and I’m really glad because I can’t tell the difference between him and James. Both of them are recovering alcoholics too, which they discuss openly, so I’m not gossiping here, but it’s one more way I can’t tell them apart. They remind me of the twins Jeremy Irons played in Dead RIngers, except a lot cheerier. The broker who couldn’t get in to the property last week with James shows up for round 2, but isn’t pleased that there’s no wiggle room on the price. I fail to see why, when you’re paying millions, another $230,000 makes or breaks a real estate purchase. Sure enough, her client wants the house anyway.

Ooh, there’s going to be a mermaid in next week’s episode!

And Vanderpump Rules is back soon! Gratuitous shots of Giggy!