Monthly Archives: September 2016

September 6, 2016 – GH’s Wedding Concludes, HAHN Finales & the Original Below Deck Returns

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Sam and Jason’s wedding continues. Out of all the lovely outfits, I’m drawn to Danny’s blue ombre shirt.

Ava tracks down Paul. She thinks he’s avoiding her. She wants to discuss the strategy for Julian’s trial now, or she’s going to the cops.

Curtis asks Finn how much trouble Hayden is in. Finn says for one thing, she’s been arrested for murder. He says it’s complicated and Curtis says it always is. Finn says Hayden is innocent and they have to get her out.

Naomi tells Franco that Elizabeth is in the hospital and now is not a good time to tell her she shares a father with Hayden.

Monica tells Elizabeth that Sam and Jason are getting married. She says it’s just a small wedding, like this makes it better news. Monica gets a call and has to step outside. Elizabeth asks Sabrrrina if she was invited. Sabrrrina says yes, but she wanted to stay with Elizabeth and didn’t say anything about it for obvious reasons.

Spinelli begins to officiate. No surprise, he uses a lot of big words. He asks Jason and Sam if they’re ready to be married. He tells the guests that the size of the wedding shows them how important they are to the couple. He says they helped Jason and Sam become who they are today, and they’re here to join their lives for the rest of their lives. He talks about them being separated and how nothing could keep them apart. Dammit! He blew it by using that word I hate – soulmates – but I let it pass. He says the couple has prepared their own vows and Sam is like, really? we did?

Elizabeth tells Sabrrrina she’ll probably always love Jason, but she’s glad he’s moving on with his life and she is too. Sabrrrina wants to know who she’s dating and Elizabeth tells her it’s Franco.

Franco talks to himself or God or something. He says the one time he tried to do the right thing, it was the wrong thing, and he’ll just wait until he hears from the universe.

Naomi visits Hayden, who is still in the interrogation room, and tells her everything is going to be fine.

Curtis wonders why Hayden got arrested, and Finn says Franco found her standing over Elizabeth when she got pushed down the stairs. Curtis says sometimes the cops build a case too soon, and then need to prove themselves right. He says he wants to prove Hayden innocent. Valerie suddenly appears at the bar and asks if that’s so. I hate to be picky – even though I always am and think I deserve it after a 50 year investment in this show – but Valerie is pretty far away to have heard that. It’s not like Curtis was shouting.

Commercial break. Great. I’m confused as to what day of the week it is, because, holiday on a Monday. I’m also trying to shake my Z-Nation longing after watching it for nearly 24 hours.

Valerie is picking up lunch, on her break from “railroading innocent people.” Finn suddenly discovers the jukebox and gets away form the conversation. Curtis apologizes but says he knows Hayden and she’s not a killer. Valerie disagrees.

Naomi tells Hayden their lawyers are on it. Hayden says she hopes they believe she’s innocent. Hope they do better than they did for her father too.

Elizabeth tells Sabrrrina about getting to know Franco and how he’s not what people think. She says she tried to fight it and couldn’t. Sabrrrina says she understand more than Elizabeth might think, but other people might not see him the same way. Elizabeth says if they want to be stupid, so be it, but Sabrrrina says she won’t. She hopes things turn out better than they did for her and Carrrlos.

Paul tells Ava he can’t just drop the charges. Ava asks him what the plan is then.

Spinelli says he just assumed Jason and Sam wrote their own vows and looks for vows on his phone. Sam says never mind, there is something she’d like to say. She talks about how Jason is a partner, but doesn’t take away from her independence; he makes her more, not less. He taught her that the greatest risk of all was letting another person into her heart, and he made her want to take that risk. She promises to love him unconditionally, cherish all their moments together, and honor him and their family until death do them part and beyond. Buzz Lightyear pops into my head. Jason says he promised himself if he ever found Sam again, he’d never let her go. He lists all the things he loves about her and says he wants to spend the rest of his life with her. He says he’s not one for tradition, but recites the traditional vows. They exchange rings and Spinelli pronounces them husband and wife. They kiss. Very nice!

There’s dancing, and Alexis hits the champagne some more. Jake and Danny poke at the cake, so Sam and Jason decide to cut into it early. It’s really pretty. White with a small bouquet of flowers on top, and a lacy contrasting border at the bottom of each tier. It’s traditional white cake and Danny says he prefers chocolate. I understand and actually had a chocolate cake with chocolate icing at my reception. When I told everyone what it was going to be, my maid of honor said, “You can’t do that!” and I said, “Watch me!” Carly takes the kids into the kitchen to find chocolate. Sam feeds Jason a piece of cake and he puts icing on her nose. They goof around and kiss.

Sabrrrina says one of the things that makes Elizabeth a good nurse and friend is her perception, and if Elizabeth says Franco is recovered, she believes it. Sabrrrina takes a look at Elizabeth’s vitals and thinks they’re odd. She leaves to get someone else to check.

Paul tells Ava that every step is a chance for him to undermine the process. He says Julian will get off unless she opens her mouth and screws things up. She says she’ll be watching him. Sabrrrina overhears.

Alexis talks to her daughters, telling Sam that she’s happy for her; she has a man who loves her and that she can trust. Molly asks if she’s okay and Alexis says she’s allowed to be emotional as the mother of the bride. It’s obvious she’s starting to get drunk.

Jason thanks Spinelli for officiating. He says it’s his pleasure, but he was surprised because Jason isn’t one for a party. Jason says it’s all about family and their kids can also say they were there. Spinelli asks if they’re going to try for another child and Jason says maybe someday. Yeah, like 8.75 months from now.

Curtis tells Valerie he knows Hayden better than she does and she’s not a murderer. Valerie says there’s evidence. Curtis says not enough to make a case, but she Valerie says they’re working on it. He tells her to make sure she works to solve the case, not prove herself right. Valerie says she was trained to be impartial and examine evidence, and asks if Curtis trusts her.

Naomi tells Hayden that they have to make sure justice is served, with a nudge from their legal team. Hayden is worried about Elizabeth squealing about the diamonds and going to prison anyway.

Paul asks if he can help Sabrrrina. She says she couldn’t help noticing him talking to Ava and asks if he should be consorting with her. He claims he was telling her not to intervene on her brother’s behalf, now that she’s on the straight and narrow. Paul is going to end up having to kill everyone in the hospital pretty soon.

Sabrrrina runs into Monica. She tells her that Elizabeth’s vitals seem kind of off and Monica says she’ll have someone look in on her. She asks Sabrrrina about rejoining the staff.

Alexis tells Sam to throw the bouquet to her and she’ll hold it in reserve until after the divorce. Molly suggests she get some water and leads her away. Kristina asks Sam if she’d like champagne, but Sam says no. Kristina says all the more for her.

Carly takes pictures. She and Sonny go off to get cake. Jason and Michael talk. Jason tells Michael what a fine man he’s grown to be and that he’s proud of him. Michael says he was lucky to grow up with good people around him, including Jason and Sam. He’s glad they found their way back to one another.

Carly makes a toast. She tells Jason he deserves happiness more than anyone she knows. She tells Sam it took her a while ti admit it, but she’s a perfect match for Jason and welcomes her to the family. Sonny wishes them joy and happiness, and Spinelli uses some more big words. He tells Sam it’s bad luck not to drink after a toast. Carly says maybe there’s a reason and does she want to share with the class? Sam says she and Jason are having another baby.

Monica tells Sabrrrina they’re short staffed. She can’t promise anything but she’ll present the case to the board. Sabrrrina says she’d like nothing better

Curtis says he has mad respect for Valerie. She tells him to stay out of it then, and he asks if that’s a warning. She says she fights hard enough to be taken seriously and doesn’t want to fight him too. He says she doesn’t have to worry. She gets a call and has to go to the hospital. He rejoins Finn at the pool table. Finn asks if Curtis is backing out, but Curtis says he’s all in.

Franco visits Elizabeth. He tells her that he went to the station and confronted Hayden/ Elizabeth says she hopes he didn’t create a scene. He says he didn’t see her, but got clarity. He says he has something to tell her, but she might not like it. I’m guessing the universe spoke to him.

Spinelli makes a toast to the baby, hoping that he or she knows nothing but bliss, like he’s one of the Fairy Godmothers in Sleeping Beauty.

Finn wonders how Valerie will take it when she finds out Curtis is helping Hayden. Curtis says he knows Hayden is innocent.

Hayden thanks her mother for having her back. Naomi says it’s long overdue. Hayden says her support and honesty means everything. I’m sure she’s in for a disappointment.

Franco tells Elizabeth it’s not that he’s opposed to the truth, but if a lie gets him something, historically, he’s on board. Elizabeth says he’s stalling and he says she’s right. Elizabeth says whatever it is, she can handle it.

Valerie tells Monica that the syringe had no prints, which shows the killer is no amateur.

Paul revisits the stairwell and gets a text from Ava telling him not to go back on their deal. He flashes back to pushing Elizabeth down the stairs and looks ominously at the stairwell door.

Franco tells Elizabeth that it’s complicated, and realizes he’s stalling again. As he’s about to tell her what I’m assuming is that Hayden is her sister, Elizabeth goes unconscious.

Tomorrow, Morgan screws up again, Tracy tells Dillon to go for it, and Carly says it’s the best day ever, which is a sure sign that something horrible is about to happen.

The Haves and the Have Nots

The doorbell (they have one! I started to think no one did on this show) at the Cryers rings and Hannah answers it. It’s Lloyd. She lets Kathryn know and Kathryn says she just spoke to him. Lloyd tells her they have an issue; they can’t get Wyatt’s money back. DA Jennifer has gotten a judge to rule against them. Kathryn wonders if Jennifer is trying to kill Wyatt. She says if the courts won’t protect her son, she’ll have to. Lloyd apologizes for ruining her day. When he leaves, Kathryn says he’s going to ruin someone’s day, but not hers.

Hannah has to leave. Kathryn gives her the keys to Amanda’s car. Hannah says she’ll bring it back, but Kathryn says to keep it and hands her the title. Her name is on it and the gift tax is paid already. Kathryn was planning on giving it to her before she quit. Hannah says she appreciates it. Kathryn asks Hannah to come visit her. Hannah thinks that sounds weird, but says she’ll see Kathryn later.

Jeffrey gets a call from Justin while he’s visiting Wyatt. Justin says Jeffrey needs to talk to him before it’s too late, and asks where he can search. Jeffrey tells him the backyard by the garden. Jeffrey tells Justin that he needs to find the keys.

The cops are crawling all around Candace’s place. A crowd has formed, including Quita, who Pearl tells to quit leaning on the fence. A bunch of the cops bust into the townhouse.

Jeffrey gets a call and thinks it’s Candace. It’s Melissa, who wants to know where he is. He says he’s not there and Melissa hands the phone to Veronica. He tells Veronica he’s picking up a suit for tonight. She asks Melissa for privacy and tells Jeffrey to get his ass home now. She says they have a dinner party and Jeffrey needs to ask Melissa’s father for her hand in marriage. He says he’s not coming and says she has no more cards to play. She says she’ll call the DA and he says she already did. She doesn’t know what he’s talking about, so he tells her they’re searching Candace’s place. She’s surprised, and tells him he’s her only hope of getting out of this, but he tells her to go to hell.

Benny won’t talk to Candace. She tells him she’ll get the money back. Jeffrey tries to call her, but she says she can’t talk.

David picks up Erika, who finally tells him her name. He says he’s David, but she already knows that. He asks where she’d like to go. She says there’s a dive of diner around the corner that cooks Southern food like his mama. She tells him they’re walking and to lose the tie. He goes around to open her door and she says gotcha! to herself.

Jeffrey talks to the still unconscious Wyatt about Veronica making him get engaged. He says he might be away when Wyatt gets out, but he’s always loved him and always will. He says he’s sorry about not having Wyatt’s back and talks about how Veronica set him up in jail. Kathryn is at the door and wants to know what he just said. Jeffrey explains that Veronica arranged for a violent inmate to share Wyatt’s cell and Wyatt was raped. Kathryn sprints back out the door, no doubt headed for Veronica.

David is impressed with the diner food. He almost talks about his wife, but Erika stops him and says he must have really loved her. David says he still does, but it’s over. It’s too toxic and there’s no going back. He asks how old Erica is, and even though she says this is mistake number 5000-something, tells him she’s 28. He says she’s mature, but she says that’s because he hasn’t seen the kid in her. She puts a song on the jukebox and he says the blues isn’t for kids. She asks him to dance with her and he says it’s the middle of the day. I guess he lives in Colonial America. She says he has too many rules, so he gets up to dance.

She asks him if he kisses on the first date. David says he hasn’t had a first date in a long time. Erica says she guesses making love is out of the question and suggests they leave. Alrighty then.

Kathryn hightails it to the jail to see Jim, who is still in a holding cell, which seems kind of strange after all this time. He asks if it’s his lucky day. Kathryn says it depends on how he answers her question, and asks if Wyatt was raped in prison. He tries to be evasive and Kathryn says he’s going to tell her everything that happened. He says there was a mix-up and the wrong guy got in the cell. She asks why he’s protecting Veronica, and Jim asks how she knows all this. He says to let him handle the clean-up on this one, because she has a tendency to leave a mess while he tidier. Kathryn says Jim let Wyatt be abused as a kid when he was out with his whores and then let him be abused as a man. She says she hopes he rots in there and storms out with him yelling don’t do anything stupid. Fat chance of that.

In the hallway, Kathryn makes a call to Veronica, acting all friendly. Veronica asks how Wyatt is, and Kathryn says better, but her face says revenge. Kathryn wants Veronica to make an appointment for her with the DA. She wants Jennifer at her house now. Veronica says she has a dinner party and can she do it tomorrow. Kathryn wonders why she wasn’t invited and Veronica says it’s small because Jeffrey is getting engaged and she thought Kathryn was busy with Wyatt. Kathryn insists on meeting with both Veronica and the DA at her house immediately, and tells her it won’t take long. They arrange to meet in an hour.

Veronica stops by the stoop and grabs Quita, telling her that she means what she says. She says if her plan is ruined by anything Quita’s dumb country ass did, she’d better run. Veronica gets back in her car and peels out. Quita berates the guys for not having her back.

Benny asks Mitch if he put drugs in War’s car. Mitch laughs an says what? and Benny says that’s what Candace told him and she lies all the time. Mitch says she’s not lying. Mitch says he saw War taking advantage of Candace right out front, so he set War up. Benny says he’ll kill War, but Mitch says he’ll take care of it. Benny asks who the hell he is. Mitch says it’s not who he is, but where he came from – he’s a Malone. Benny doesn’t understand and Mitch shows him a picture on his phone. Benny realizes that mob boss Michael Malone is Mitch’s father. Mitch says he doesn’t want to be in that life. He tells Benny that War was going to kill him. Benny tells him about Candace mortgaging the tow yard and his house unless he comes up with $2 million. Mitch says he can get it, but it would have to be paid back, and Benny says no way. Mitch says he’s seen the way his family doesn’t play and that’s why he wants nothing to do with them.

Benny breaks out some champagne and Mitch gets paper cups. Benny says at least they were in business for a minute and pops the cork. They toast to the future.

Oscar sneaks around David’s empty campaign office. Then he gets a clonk in the head with a metal pole. It’s Candace, who beats the crap out of him while asking where her money is.

Veronica calls Jennifer, telling her that Kathryn wants to meet with her regarding Wyatt’s inheritance. She wonders if maybe Jennifer could give Kathryn partial access to the estate. Jennifer says maybe, and Veronica sets up the meeting. Jennifer says Kathryn had better not threaten her again.

Benny goes home and flops into a chair. Hannah and Quincy Jr. come downstairs. Quincy asks if he can stay there as long as he wants to and Benny says yes. Benny asks Hannah whose car is out there, and Hannah tells him Kathryn gave it to him. He’s obviously dejected and Hannah tells Quincy Jr to go upstairs and finish his book. Benny tells Hannah about Candace mortgaging the house and tow yard, and forging his signature. He says if the bank doesn’t get the money by tomorrow, they’re out.

Hannah says okay. Benny says, so that’s it? Hannah says she cooked a good meal, adding one day he’ll listen to his momma, but until then she can’t say anything and they’ll just enjoy tonight. We hear an old spiritual playing over the scene as Benny cries. Poor Benny. This really sux for him.

Meanwhile, At the Cryer household, Kathryn thanks Veronica and Jennifer for coming. Jennifer says let’s get going. Kathryn tells Jennifer that if Wyatt has access to his inheritance it will kill him. She tells Jennifer to go back to the judge. Veronica asks if she can at least reduce it. Jennifer says she can talk to Wyatt when he wakes up. Kathryn says she’s willing to take a chance on Wyatt’s life because she and Jim had an affair. Jennifer says they never slept together and that’s not just a lie, it’s a stretch. Veronica asks if it’s David she’s after, and calls her a vulgar piece of trash. Jennifer says aren’t they getting divorced and Kathryn claps her hands, saying she’s getting off track. Jennifer says she’ll talk to Wyatt. Kathryn says he’ll never do it and Jennifer says that’s all they have to say then.

Kathryn says that Veronica doesn’t fully know why she’s there, and she let a rapist in with her son. Veronica acts ignorant, and Kathryn says she’s here for two reasons, reminding me of the scene in Kill Bill Vol. 1 where The Bride explains to Sophie why she’s allowed to live. Kathryn tells Veronica that one, she’s the greatest attorney in the country. No one is better and she gets the worst of the worst off. Kathryn says Jim didn’t trust her, but she does because Veronica fears nothing. She tells Veronica that today she’s going to teach her who to fear and how, and she promises Veronica will fear her forever. Kathryn says the other reason is for her to witness the fury that runs cold in her veins. Unlike Veronica and Jim, she does her own dirty work, and doesn’t take the easy way out.

Kathryn asks Jennifer one last time to save her son. Jennifer says no. Kathryn pulls a gun out from under a pillow and shoots Jennifer several times. The force knocks Jennifer and the chair backward.

Nice.

Kathryn points the gun at a terrified Veronica and says her job is to get Kathryn off. Kathryn walks past Jennifer’s body, adjusts a vase of flowers, and goes upstairs, leaving Veronica totally freaked. The credits roll in silence.

This was the finale, which makes me bummed, but If Loving You is Wrong will be back, so that’s the upside. I can’t wait to find out what’s up with Randall being trapped in that box.

Below Deck

Captain Lee is ready for a whole new set of challenges. I’ll bet he gets them. Ben is back and ready to roll, as are Kate and Kelley. Trevor is the senior deckhand; deckhand Nico, also called Freako (we’re off to a great start); Lauren, another deckhand; Emily, the second stew, who says she’s not normal; and Sierra, stew #3. Looking ahead, I see lots of drunken revelry.

It’s going to be the British Virgin Islands this time. Kate gets to the yacht first. The Valor has gotten a total interior makeover and looks gorgeous and much better than the garish decor of Mediterranean‘s Ionian Princess. Kate is concerned about breaking in two new stews, but says anything is better than Rocky from last season. Never say something like that, Kate. Kelly is next and Captain Lee tells him not to screw the pooch. We see flash backs from the last time he was a cast member, which wasn’t a good look for him. The captain says if his crew is screwing up, Kelley is the one he’ll be looking for.

Kate is friends with Kelley’s sister, Amy, and is willing to give him a second chance. The rest of the staff trickles in. Everyone introduces themselves. I’m smelling pita all over Trevor already. Ben! He’s glad to work another season with Kate after doing the Mediterranean gig. He and Kate are friends, sometimes more than that, which can complicate things. Kate is in sexual limbo, and at present has a girlfriend. More complication!

Kelley tells the crew no fraternizing with the enemy guests. OMG – the stew’s shirts are adorable! White short sleeve v-necks with a yacht on the back and sparkly anchors on the sleeves. Sierra hasn’t arrived yet, which concerns Kate.

Trevor introduces his egotistical self. Emily is from London, and she and Ben chat about life in the UK. Captain Lee calls everyone to the lounge. The captain tells Kate that her remaining stew missed the flight, so they’ll be short handed for a day. He says he always walks around with cash and plane tickets in case he needs to kick anyone home. Kate is happy with Emily. For now.

The deckhands talk about their love lives or lack thereof. Captain Lee goes over the guests and their preferences. The primary, Allison, is bringing some Instagram friends she’s never met. Ben says none of the guests like the same foods, so it’s going to be a bit of a nightmare. Isn’t that what we call “a challenge” now? Kate fills Emily in on what needs to be done before the guests get there. Kate tells Emily about her girlfriend. She says she was never in the closet, she just walked in, got a new outfit, and came back out. Ha-ha! Everyone bunks for the night. Trevor choosing his like he’s Ramona on The Real Housewives of NYC.

Kate is impressed that Emily isn’t freaking out over there not being a third stew. Ben says he’s missing four pounds of spinach and can’t deal with provisions coming just before the guests’ arrival.

And here they are. Kate says the guests go from complete strangers to being the center of your universe in about three seconds. She shows them around the boat. It’s unbelievably beautiful and the guests are appropriately dazzled. Trevor is sure there are bodies in all the suitcases because they’re so heavy. This is the part where I desperately want to be on this boat. Not with these people though. Right away, all the guests are on their phones.

They shove off and Trevor sort of reminds me of  Martin Short‘s Ed Grimly. Ben is doing family style platters. He says if you screw up the first meal, it’s usually hard to recover. It looks amazing and the guests concur. The Valor drops anchor.

Sierra calls Captain Lee and he asks what happened. She says she missed her flight. The captain offers to send someone to pick her up. Kate says she won’t hold it against Sierra, but she’ll be working double time to make up for it.

Kate suggests a place called Willy T’s to the guests – it’s a floating shipwreck where you can go topless. Is there a bar at least? They take a small boat over and fling their tops away. Kelley is already acting stupid over one of the guests. Sierra and Ben discuss Kate’s new girlfriend. Ben doesn’t think there’s a switch you can flip, but says whatever makes her happy. In his interview, he muses over the fact that Kate has a girlfriend and he’s still single.

Sierra finally gets to The Valor. In her interview, she says she doesn’t know what happened that she missed her plane and seems like a real ditz. She ought to get along great with Kate. Not really. Trevor has the mistaken impression that they’re going to be “besties.” Kate quickly shows her around.

The guests return. Captain Lee asks Kelley how the crew is doing. He says fine so far and the captain tells him not to make any knee-jerk decisions. Ben wants every dish to have a social media title and enlists Trevor’s help with the beef. He suggests InstaHam. Because ham is beef. Finally he comes up with Social Meatia. Not awful, but not very specific.
Kate gives the guests thumbs up signs like Facebook has and tells them to make comments on what they like. She says it’s too bad the guests won’t look up from their phones long enough to see the #hardwork they’ve done to plan the evening.

The captain joins the guests for dinner. Everything the crew says is now preceded by “hashtag.” Dinner is served. Ha-ha! – hashtag browns and chicken tinders! Kate is pleased that Kelley is ignoring the flirtation from the table. Trevor thinks he made the dinner happen. Oh brother. Captain Lee says #getmeouttahere and turns in. Kate and Ben soak their feet in the galley sink after the guests go to bed. Lauren and Kelley discuss Trevor.

The guests are loving breakfast. Nico tells Kelley he thinks they’re a good team, but Trevor needs to cool his jets. Kelley has to explain to Trevor that he’s not supposed to take his shirt off in front of the guests. Only Kelley is allowed to do that. Kelley tells Captain Lee that Trevor is a little brash and not treating the deckhands well. The captain tells him to sit Trevor down and tell him to ease up on the gas and that he’s not indispensable.

This season – Lots of water, lots of tips, lots of drinking, Kate’s girlfriend visits, Emily and Ben get together, a guest poodle is accommodated, a psychic tells Captain Lee that his mother is talking from the other side even though she’s not dead, Captain Lee has a problems with the deckhands, and Trevor and Emily get lectures.

** The Real Housewives of NYC’s Reunion Part Two airs on Wednesday, September 7 at 9 pm. Don’t miss Ramona whipping out some evidence!

A new nighttime drama on OWN, Queen Sugar, looks promising as well. It airs after The Haves and the Have Nots on Tuesdays.

September 5, 2016 – A Lot of Housewives & a Little Z-Nation

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

My excitement can barely be contained – less than two weeks from now, on September 16, Z-Nation returns! If I was forced to pick only one show to feast on, this would be the one. (With maybe a side order of General Hospital.) While I enjoy both Walking Dead programs, Z-Nation has the sense of humor I love with my horror. For lack of a better word, I also think it’s more realistic and feel more investment in the more well-rounded characters. Chances are, the group you’d be running with during the apocalypse wouldn’t all be depressed and/or depressing. There would always be a Murphy or a Doc who didn’t always take everything so seriously. And it’s still just as relentless in excitement. Lots of fun guest stars too, like Anthony Michael Hall and Gina Gershon, both of whom were wonderful. I also have to admit to a TV crush on Citizen Z and Pup. (I recently discovered that DJ Qualls was originally a model for Prada. While I think he’s cute, I was like, whaaat?) The Sy-we-don’t-know-how-to-spell-Fy network had/has a marathon going on today and will probably have another one before the season premiere, so if you have love for the zombie apocalypse and haven’t seen it yet, give it a try.

No GH for us today. Since it’s a holiday, it was also a rerun. Moving on…

The Real Housewives of the OC

Tamra is planning some dune buggy riding during Eddie’s birthday event in Glamis and she’s buying helmets for all the ladies. She calls to see if Meghan is going, but that’s a no due to her pregnancy. Tamra thinks Meghan is being a coward, saying pregnant women run marathons, but I’m with Meghan on this one. Bouncing around in a dune buggy is not the same thing and she’s gone through a lot with the IVF. Tamra says Shannon is acting like she didn’t even get an invite, and she has the feeling Shannon wants to avoid Kelly. She calls Shannon next, telling her about Heather renting an RV. As soon as Tamra tells her who’s coming, suddenly Shannon remembers she has some lung issue where she has to avoid dirt or something. Geez, at least make an effort to create a good story.

Kelly does some shopping for the trip. Her only concern is Heather pointing a judgmental finger at her. She tells her husband about Shannon’s vow renewal and how Vicki wasn’t invited, which she thinks was mean. They look at windbreakers, and Michael makes a typical male joke about breaking wind.

Shannon’s house is finally in escrow, She says it’s been in and out several times, but this time it looks like a go. She’s thinking she won’t be able to pack in the thirteen days before closing. She asks the realtor about more time, but he says that’s not a good idea. I fail to grasp why she hasn’t gotten going on this already. They also have to find a rental, so she gives the realtor her laundry list of wants, which is a lot. Oh no! The rental won’t have crystals buried beneath it like her house does now. How will she survive?

Heather says all she knows about Glamis is that there’s lots of sand and no stores. Horrors! She meets with the RV driver. She was expecting the RV to be like Tom Cruise‘s movie trailer and is disappointed even though it’s got the look of a nice hotel suite. Heather also doesn’t cook, so she’s had her personal chef prepare some dishes. I liked Heather at the beginning, but she’s been working my last nerve this season.

Meghan and Jim have a doctor’s appointment to see if she’s pregnant. She’s glad he’s with her, since he’s been MIA throughout all of the IVF stuff. She says she’s scared to be a mom because she’s Jim’s third wife, and even though he had children with the other two, things didn’t work out. I’m not sure what she’s saying here. That Jim leaves as soon as children are in the picture? I’m laughing because Jim is one of the most emotionless people I’ve ever seen. “Hey, Jim! The house just burned down.” Jim looks at the sky and picks his nose.

The RV picks up Tamra and Kelly. Even though the RV isn’t up to Heather’s expectations, Tamra is impressed, saying she wouldn’t expect anything else from “Fancy Pants.” She’s also concerned about Kelly, who she says is like a rescue dog, who you don’t know whether will lick or bite you. Next, they pick up Vicki.

While on the RV, Kelly suddenly gets nauseous. Vicki has to hold her ears when Kelly throws up, since she’s susceptible to anyone else getting ill. What is wrong with this bunch of wimps? This is the last group who should go camping, or do anything other than stay at a 5-star hotel up to Dubai’s standards. Kelly calls her husband to give him the deets. The driver misses a sign and has to turn around. Tamra thinks Heather should have spent more money on the driver than the vehicle. The ladies sing Kumbaya. This is starting to remind me of the time I took a bus trip through New England with my grandmother and her senior group.

Meghan gets a call from the doctor. Jim yawns and I laugh again. The pregnancy test is positive. He says they’ll do an ultrasound in two weeks. Meghan asks if it could be twins, but the doctor says it’s too early to tell. Jim can barely contain his excitement. Not really.

The camp site is already set up and Eddie is there to greet the ladies. Tamra’s mother is also there and a couple of people I don’t know. Heather introduces her son, Nicky. In her interview, Heather gushes over the place, going on about how beautiful it is and confusing me. While Heather will be staying in the RV, Tamra has rented trailers for everyone else. Vicki goes around showing her grandson, Troy, all the fabulousness via her phone. Sarah, Ryan and their baby also make an appearance. I think Sarah might have another kid there, but at this point, there’s too many kids running around and I can’t keep track of them.

Vicki goes running on the sand dunes. In her interview, Kelly says she’d join Vicki, but Principal Dubrow would probably shake a finger at her. Ha-ha! Oddly enough, it’s Tamra who tells Vicki to get off of the dunes, because there are dune buggies flying around everywhere and they’ll run right over her. Heather scrutinizes Kelly in her interview, saying she seems to be on her best behavior, but it remains to be seen if she keeps her promise. In her interview, Vicki says she’d like to be a princess like Heather, but she’ll probably be working until the day she dies. I find it a little hard to believe that Vicki needs to work until she dies unless she wants to. Or did Brooks took all her savings too?

Meghan and Jim are at their house in a gated country club community. I wonder how many houses they have. I always find the concept of having multiple homes desirable, but it’s probably not as fun as it seems. Shannon and David are meeting up with them to play golf. Because they have so much time on their hands before they move. Shannon says she doesn’t want to pack and is an avoider. An avoider previously lived in my house too. Not only did we have to agree that it not be “broom clean” as stated in the contract and let her park her RV here for two weeks to get her moved out on time, but she was still here when we moved in. You read that right. She was sitting in a folding chair in front of a closet still full of her stuff. My husband’s aunt had a summer home nearby. I told my husband I was going there and having a beer, and when I got back, she’d better be gone. She was. I also have to admit, there were some cool things left here, like a set of Gilbert & Sullivan recordings on 78 rpm albums.

Eddie teaches Nicky how to ride an ATV. Tamra suggests he ask for one for Christmas, along with a personal desert. The ladies get ready for their dune buggy adventure and we see flash backs of Tamra’s terrible driving. Kelly complains about sand in her face and having to pee. You can dress these girls up, but you can’t take them out. Tamra tells her group to hold on and drives like the Tasmanian Devil. And flips the buggy. Nice work.

Heather tells everyoen not to move and calls for the medic. Vicki gets sick and Kelly keeps yelling for the EMT. Both Vicki and Tamra have collars put on them. The dune buggy ambulance arrives. The medics ask both Vicki and Tamra questions, trying to determine their injuries. They both get put on boards and a helicopter lands. Eddie leaves with Tamra for the hospital, but the helicopter is taking Vicki to Palm Springs. She’s feeling numbness somewhere. Heather claims to be in help mode, but I swear, as hurt as I was, I’d deck her one for saying things like “you’re okay” and “you’re strong” ten thousand times. She calls Briana to let her know what’s happening, but Briana is sick and can’t go there. Kelly’s helmet came off and she says she’s lucky she didn’t get hurt. Heather brags to Terry about how helpful she was, while Kelly talks to Tamra’s mother.

Kelly realizes later that she hurt her elbow and Heather gives her some ice. Heather calls Meghan and tells her about the accident. She says that Vicki is in Palm Springs and all alone, but that’s about forty-five minutes away from them, and God forbid Meghan might be inconvenienced. After she hangs up, Meghan gets annoyed because Vicki isn’t her friend and she doesn’t want to go and felt like Heather was pressuring her. Okay, here I’m on Heather’s team. She might not consider Vicki a friend, but she’s a co-worker who is all by herself. Not a good look.

Next time, Meghan tells Shannon about the accident, the girls call Vicki in the hospital, Tamra can’t do the competition, and Meghan and Heather argue, probably politely.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey

Jacqueline tells Chris about how she and Teresa got along on the girls trip and it seemed like old times. Chris asks if she’s happy that the weekend turned out well. No, she wanted. to fight. Kiddingnotkidding. In his interview, Chris says she’s happy now, but as soon as somebody says something stupid, it will go back again. That ought to take about five minutes. Maybe less.

Siggy visits Dolores. Sadly, Dolores had to have her dog, Boo, euthanized because he had kidney failure. Siggy brings flowers and a present. It’s tough for me to watch because I love my dogs so much. Dolores says she doesn’t cry easily, but this is very hard on her.

Melissa is stumped over an order that comes into the store. Her manager, Derek, thinks he and Jackie placed it. (He doesn’t know?) Melissa calls Jackie and tells her that she wants everything that comes into the store to go by her first. Jackie argues that not everyone is a size zero like her. In her interview, Melissa says it’s not as much fun as she thought it would be. Work never is. She tells Jackie that she’s stressed out and Jackie says welcome to owning a business, and tells her she doesn’t have to be there 24/7. She admits to not being good at delegating and Jackie suggests she take some time off.

Teresa – omg, one of their dogs has a magenta mohawk and stripe running down it’s back – tells Gia that she wishes she could come to the book party, but you have to be twenty-one. I guess it’s in a bar. Joe #1 comes in and Gia argues with him. In her interview, Teresa says Joe is drinking more and unraveling. She asks him how he’s doing and he says fine. She says she was all about making memories before she “went away,” and wishes Joe would calm down.

Siggy picks up her son from school and they discuss his upcoming ski trip with his father. She lets him drive, but kibbutzes the whole time and says once he gets his license, he’ll be lost to her. He tells her she has no limits and is loud, and she asks what he expects since she was born in a bomb shelter. I futilely try to figure that one out.

Teresa tells Joe #1 that he’s just like his father and he tells her to shut up. He’s seriously nasty and she tells him to please leave the kitchen. He says the only thing he’s going to miss is his children. Obviously, he’s not taking this going to prison thing too well. Teresa says that she feels like she has five kids instead of four. In her interview, Dolores says it’s in Teresa’s DNA that you never get divorced. Teresa reminds Dolores about the book party coming up. Dolores says she and Siggy are going together.

Jacqueline and Chris are having a poker night. Chris excited because Rosie is going to be there. She and Joe #1 hung out a lot when Teresa was “away,” but she got the brush off since Teresa’s return. I already figure this isn’t going to go well.

Melissa is dealing with her children when Derek calls her about a deadline. Joe #2 comes home and she asks him to help with dinner, but God forbid. He says he’s going to poker night and she says someone has to pick up their son from wrestling. In his interview, he whines that no one helps him with everything. He cuts out as fast as possible.

Rosie arrives at Jacqueline’s. She fells badly about some things she said about Joe #1 on New Year’s Eve. In her interview, she says something I can’t understand because so many words are bleeped. She’s not sure where she stands with Teresa and doesn’t understand what the wedge between them is about. I dunno. I guess discussing it with them is out of the question.

Joe #2 arrives and Rosie talks to him about the other Joe. He makes up something about everyone being busy. Chris calls Joe #1 who says he’s tired and in bed. He says they don’t need him anyway, since Rosie’s is a good poker player. She says she was hoping to see him. They hang up and Rosie wants to leave. In her interview, she says she wanted to see Joe #1 and doesn’t need this bullsh*t. Jacqueline says she doesn’t think he’s not coming because of her, but she wants to leave anyway. These people are incredibly clueless. Jacqueline explains to the guys that Rosie was counting on seeing Joe #1 and thinks there’s some kind of rift.

Rosie comes back. In her interview, she says Joe #1 claimed to have had too much to drink. She says she doesn’t know if Teresa had anything to do with it, but she feels badly for him. She tells the others about her stupid remarks on New Year’s Eve and that she feels guilty. Joe #2 calls Teresa and asks about Joe #1‘s absence, which she explains by saying it’s getting closer to his time in the pokey and he’s kind of freaked out. Chris says he’s glad that his family isn’t as screwed up as Joe #2’s is.

Siggy helps Dolores go through her paperwork. She’s been giving her bills to Frank, but Siggy thinks she needs to get some independence. Dolores says Frank has always handled the bills and she handled the kids. Teresa joins them, and checks out the renovations. Teresa says that “it’s” starting to get to Joe #1 and she needed to get out for some air. Siggy explains what’s going on with Dolores’s bills and Teresa says Dolores needs to start understanding what everything is about. Dolores says she and Frank have a symbiotic relationship. Teresa says she’s lucky to have Frank in her life, but that could always change. Dolores gets excited when she sees a check for cable over-payment. She’s seriously ignorant of her expenses.

Melissa curls her daughter Antonia’s hair for a father/daughter dance. She tells Antonia  that she’s busy with the boutique right now, but doesn’t want their relationship to suffer. She talks to Antonia about what she wants to be when she grows up. Joe #2 says he’s a handsome devil and Melissa gives him a wrist corsage for Antonia. He and Melissa take pictures.

Gia and Teresa have a girls night and go out for sushi. Teresa says she appreciated Gia’s help when she wasn’t around and wants to do something special. Gia takes pictures of the food and calls her father a butthead. She says prison will be good for him. Teresa asks if she means the drinking, and Gia says partly, but he needs to realize what he has. Astute kid. Teresa says he makes the wrong decisions when he drinks. She says she thinks Gia is going to miss him, and she says she will, but she’s not too worried. Teresa tells Gia how proud she is of her. She does seem mature for her age, but she had to grow up kind of fast.

Chris wonders if Joe #1 is coming to the book launch party. He and Jacqueline hitch a limo ride with Dolores, Siggy and her husband.

Teresa is trying tot get ready, and Melania and Audriana act up. Teresa tells Audriana to get to bed and in her interview says that they’re acting out because they know Joe #1 is leaving soon. In the limo, Joe #1 asks Teresa how she’s feeling and she says she’s happy about the book, but not so happy about other things.

Joe #1 gets a call from one of his friends, but Teresa tells him that the friend can’t bring his 12-year-old son. Another deal breaker is that the friend is a felon. Joe tells his felon father friend that they’ll work it out at the venue, but Teresa says it’s a no.

The bar is pretty crowded and Joe #1 can’t get a drink fast enough. Everyone is introducing everyone, and Joe slips out. Teresa’s lawyer has to explain to Joe why his friend can’t come in. Peter the Felon screams at Joe on the street. I think he’s had a few drinks too.

Joe #1 is paged inside the bar, but he’s too busy outside to know. Lawyer James explains what’s going on to Teresa, while Peter rages on, yelling about the mob and the government. Joe comes back in and Teresa is introduced. Her book is number two on the NY Times best seller list. Teresa thanks everyone for coming. She says she wanted to show her daughters what she went through when they get old enough. She says the book is also a love story about her and Joe. She tells everyone she loves them.

Teresa’s lawyer says she’s number two and the Pope is number four. Joe jokes about coming back skinny as hell. Everyone toasts to everything.

This season, Jacqueline’s daughter gets engaged, Melissa has a fashion show, Joe #2 argues with Melissa, Jacqueline calls Melissa a “fake, phony bitch” (!) and embarrasses herself, Joe #1 tells his daughters he’s not dying just going away, and Joe #1 goes away.

September 4, 2016 – Fear the Dead Stands Alone

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

No Wives tonight because Bravo is always afraid to put on any new shows when it’s even near a holiday, or the Olympics are on, or it’s raining.

Fear the Walking Dead

I’m watching the tail end of last week’s episode again, and now that I take a better look, Alejandro sure got a chunk taken out of him with that zombie bite. I like Alejandro, but I don’t believe for a second that he has the right idea. I wonder if any of these characters will ever do a crossover to The Walking Dead.

We see a wedding celebration going on in the hotel. A little prequel to the prequel. Everyone is having a great time and the bride and groom have their first dance. The guests chit-chat and the waitstaff looks bored. The father of the bride is called up amid applause. The coordinator asks the mother if everything is okay. She says no, they have to leave, as the border might close due to the “sickness” that’s running rampant. The coordinator tells a waiter to get the vehicles.

As the mother and father of the bride dance – the last one, she says – the father drops to the floor. Zombie infection or heart attack? The bride gives him CPR. Zombie gets my vote, since he just bit off half her face as a waltz plays in the background. The music continues over the scene, making it really eerie. The coordinator locks all of the guests in the banquet room. Remind me not to recommend her.

Travis and Chris are walking down a deserted road. Travis thinks they should look for shelter. Me too, since he’s not doing too well, limping along. They see a station wagon and break into it. Chris wants to look for food at a nearby taco place, but Travis is hesitant. He tells Chris that if he sees anything to come right back and tosses him a crowbar.

Chris enters the restaurant. He sees water and a can of beans on the counter, but he also hears voices in the back. As he takes the supplies, several zombies wander in. He dispatches them, and three live guys come out from the back. He jets.

Chris runs to the car and tells Travis to get going. It’s a really cool old wagon, turquoise and white. Must be a decent car too, if it started after all this time. They drive away and Travis tries the radio. Nothing, which should be no surprise to anyone. He tells Chris to check the glove compartment (or glove box, depending on where you’re from). Not much in there, but he finds a woven bracelet and keeps it. I assume this is being noted for some future reason.

Travis stops the car and tells Chris it’s time to learn to drive since there’s no traffic. Really? We’re doing this now? In the dark no less? Chris starts and stalls a few times, and Travis gives him instructions. No Chris, don’t look at Travis, look at the road.

Meanwhile, Alicia looks out of a peephole in one of the hotel rooms and sees zombies strolling past. She counts them by carving marks on the door. One of them gets thisclose to the peephole and makes bitey faces.

Commercial break. The Blair Witch sequel is in theaters September 16. They’re claiming it’s the scariest sequel ever, but that remains to be seen. And it won’t be scary at all if they keep showing me pieces of it.

Chris continues to do the driving. They see someone walking along the road and he slows, but it’s a zombie. Travis tells Chris driving is pretty easy, except for parallel parking. He doesn’t know the half of it if he’s never tried to park in NYC. Travis says he doesn’t believe this is the end. He can’t and he won’t. He says neither should Chris and they’ll get back what they lost, but not everything. You know that song Running on Empty? Well, they are and the car slows to a stop.

They build a fire in the woods and eat out of the humongous can of beans that Chris swiped. Travis asks if he remembers camping. Chris says his mom hated it, but Travis says she endured it for their sakes. They talk about what it might be like in the mountains where they used to go, and Travis thinks a place like that might be safe. Chris asks what they’re doing, and Travis says surviving. He thinks they should go to a place with a vantage point. Chris suggests the border, but Travis says it’s dangerous. There’s water there and predators will be looking for prey. Chris asks what happens once they find somewhere, and Travis tells him they start over.

Uh-oh. Here comes a truck and you know they saw that fire. Chris and Travis hide. No surprise, it’s the guys from the taco place. The leader of the group says they’re not going to hurt anyone over refried beans, but want to camp there and wouldn’t want to pee in them on the dark. Like I believe he’d be concerned about that, but it was funny. Travis and Chris come out and leader says Chris demonstrated his badassness, killing those zombies. They introduce themselves as Brandon, Derek and Baby James (is he a James Taylor fan or something else?) Chris claims he saved their lives, but Brandon says not so much.

Alicia bides her time, watching what’s going on below from a balcony. She quietly leaves the room and sees zombies down a hallway. She runs in the other direction, calling for Ofelia. Yeah, where’d she go? She pries open some elevator doors, but no car and the zombies are getting close. She jumps in and grabs onto the cables. Talk about badass. The zombies jump too, but they’re not very coordinated because they’re dead, and they fall. A woman appears at another floor and Alicia climbs to her. Somehow, the woman manages to pull her into the hallway. She puts a fire ax to Alicia’s throat and asks, “Where is he?” Who? What? The hell? It’s the coordinator from the wedding.

Everone sits around the campfire. Brandon says they’re the first Americans they’ve met since all hell broke loose. He tells them they’ve been trying to get back to San Diego ever since. Travis tells them they came from the north, and that San Diego is gone and so is LA. He says everything is destroyed up to the Continental Divide. Brandon says they’ll come back; they always do.

Brandon tells Chris he showed some skill at taking out the “wasted.” He asks where Chris learned it and Travis says it came naturally. Chris says it gets easier with practice. Travis tells Brandon they appreciate the food, but they’ll be out of there in the morning. Brandon asks if they’d like to join them. Travis says they want to carve a place out for themselves and asks if the guys can spare gas. Brandon says they can’t, but they’ll give them a ride.

Alicia realizes the woman is the one who put the “do not disturb” signs on the doors. The woman wants to know where Hector is. Alicia says she doesn’t know who that is, but her mom and friends are there. The woman says she only saw Alicia. Alicia says her mother needs her and she has to go. The woman tries to stop her. Alicia asks who Hector is. The woman says her nephew, but he went for food and didn’t come back. She introduces herself as Elena. She’s the hotel manager and the remaining live guests want the keys from her. She says whoever has the keys controls the hotel. Alicia asks how many guests are left and she says about a dozen. Alicia says if she helps find her family, they can help in return. Otherwise they’ll die there.

In their tent, Travis and Chris talk. Travis doesn’t trust the new guys, but Chris thinks they can use the help. He says they’re willing to share their supplies and Travis asks how come they have so much? He doesn’t want to be in debt to anyone. Chris thinks Travis just wants to look for Madison, but he says he only wants to take care of Chris, and thinks the guys are dangerous. Chris says maybe that’s what it takes. Travis says they’ll go with them to the next town, but that’s the end of it. They’re going to find their own car and their own place.

Alicia and Elena leave the room and Elena leads the zombies away. Elena goes down another hallway and Alicia leads the zombies to one of the rooms. Good thing they’re slow moving. She stabs the closest one in the head and goes onto the balcony. Elena closes the room door because she’s good at that. She goes to the next room and tosses a sheet to Alicia who uses it to climb sideways and nearly falls in the process.

Alicia asks what took her so long and Elena says she needed to make sure they were all in there. Alicia asks her to come downstairs with her. She says her mother would die for her, and now she needs her. Elena agrees to go with her.

They reach the banquet room. Elena remembers the wedding. She tells Alicia about how the father of the bride had a heart attack, became a zombie and attacked his daughter. Alicia asks what she did, and she says she contained the situation. The hotel was at capacity and she had the other guests to consider. She couldn’t let the sickness spread, so she locked them in. She starts crying as well she should, since obviously this plan didn’t work very well. She says it was supposed to only be until help came, but it never did. She says they died and now they hate her. Alicia says she’s seen worse and she promises not to let them touch Elena. They leave the banquet room.

Travis and Chris hitch a ride with the new guys. Travis sits in the bed of the truck with Brandon, while Chris talks women with the guys up front. Brandon tells Travis this is awesome – no traffic, no cops, no bills – the end times has made them gods. They see a farm up ahead and stop there.

Finding nothing but dust, they decide to check the barn. Travis tells Chris that they should stay there and make it home. Chris is not into that idea and says they need other people. He leaves Travis to check out the barn with the other guys.

They hear noises from the barn and it turns out to be a flock of chickens. They get excited because it’s protein. So are beans, but I’ll let it pass. (No pun intended.) Travis sees a makeshift graveyard. Most of the Suaraz family died in 2010.

Alicia and Elena walk through the downstairs. The doors to the bar are locked, but Alicia sees a bunch of zombies inside. She calls for her mother. The group of living hotel guests, including the mother of the bride (how’d that happen?) come out with Hector. They want the keys, but Alicia says not to hand them over yet. She asks about her mother, but Elena says she’s not with them so she must be gone.

Alicia says she doesn’t believe her mother is gone. One of the guests tells Elena to give him the keys and she can have Hector. Elena is afraid they’re going to kill her anyway and the bride’s mother thinks that’s a swell idea. Alicia tells her to hand over the keys like she knows what she’s doing. Elena tosses them and grabs Hector. Alicia busts the door open, releasing the zombies.

Travis joins the others in the barn. Brandon wants Chris’s help, but Travis wants Chris to leave with him. He thinks someone might still be on the farm. He’s right, because a guy comes in with a gun and starts speaking in Spanish. Brandon and Bro’s don’t speak Spanish, but Travis says this is the guy’s house and they have no right to be intruding.

Alicia sees someone from behind in the bar who looks like Madison. She starts to turn and Alicia thinks it’s her mom the zombie (and we do too, but not really). It’s not, and she stabs the lookalike in the head.

Speaking Spanish, Travis tells Mr. Suaraz to drop the gun, that he’s outnumbered. When that doesn’t work, he says they’ll go, but instead, Mr. Suaraz shoots Baby James. Great. He was the only one I could tell apart from the other two.

Elena, Hector and Alicia make a run for it. Elena opens a trapdoor that leads to underground hallways beneath the hotel, and the go down. While they run through the corridors, zombies pop out at them and it’s pretty tense, especially since it’s dark and kind of narrow.

Travis pleads with the bro’s, but it’s Chris who shoots Mr. Suaraz. Oh yeah, didn’t he stab that other guy on the boat and acted sort of creepy in general?

Alicia is in the lead and comes up to a door. The zombies aren’t far behind and she can’t get it open. She starts pulling at it and banging on it. It opens from the other side and it’s Madison, who grabs Alicia in. Elena and Hector follow. Victor slides something in front of the door to block it.

Travis is on his knees, watching Mr. Suaraz die. He’s obviously devastated. Chris holds out his hand and we see the bracelet. Travis only looks at him with the saddest expression I’ve ever seen.

Next time, we find out what happened to Madison and Victor, Alejandro explains how he got bitten, and it looks like Nick snorts cocaine, or at least that’s what it looks like. Hmm…did he make a deal with that gang?

On a side note, a little trivia about the hotel. On Talking Dead, I learned that the hotel scenes were filmed in a real hotel, while it was in operation. That must have been quite a feat, with falling zombies and all. Production had to stop when guests needed to go through, and there was one particularly troublesome older gentleman. Maybe he was bucking to get in a scene. They should have slapped some zombie makeup on him and pushed him off a balcony. That’s show biz.

The other interesting thing is that, while doing research on the character of Elena, Karen Bethzabe discovered that the children of the workers who built the hotel later became the employees of the hotel. It wasn’t just a job to them, it was their life. This helped her to justify why Elena wouldn’t have wanted to leave and protected the place so fiercely.

Another bit of info about tonight’s episode is that the bride was played by Sissy Spacek‘s daughter, Schuyler Fisk, and the mother-of-the-bride played by Desperate HousewivesBrenda Strong (Mary Alice Young). I thought I’d recognized the latter from somewhere.

 

September 2, 2016 – A GH Wedding, a Flipping Out Promise & Quotes to Live By

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital – Thursday

Jason and Sam kick back in Jason’s hotel room. Sam says she’s starving, so Jason checks the room service menu. He’s not thrilled about the gourmet choices, but Sam tells him he can order the burger without the fig jam

Carly is busy making wedding plans. Nell comes downstairs and Carly babbles about the wedding. Bobbie stops by and asks who Nell is, and Carly introduces them. Nell can see Carly is dying to tell her mother their secret and says she can go ahead. Carly explains that Nell is Josslyn’s kidney donor, but they don’t want it made public. Bobbie says she’s more than grateful. Nell goes upstairs to read to Avery.

Sonny tells Oz that he doesn’t want to leave anything to chance when it comes to Julian.

Michael and Sabrrrina have finally gotten Teddy to sleep, so they take him to The Floating Rib, which makes perfect sense. They see Sonny and Oz talking. Sonny wants to stop Julian from communicating with Alexis.

Finn tells Hayden murder isn’t her style. She says she’s getting the impression he actually cares about her. He says if she tells anyone, he’ll deny it. She says now that she finds out he cares, she has to leave. I really like these two together. I liked Hayden with (the old) Nicholas, but Finn is a better match for her sense of humor.

Elizabeth tells Franco that Hayden tried to kill her. Jordan overhears them talking and asks if Elizabeth feels up to giving a statement.

Hayden tells Finn if she sticks around, it’s a risk. Finn tells her if she leaves, she’ll be a fugitive. The lights come back on and she says she’s out of there. Nurse Eileen comes in, and Finn asks about Elizabeth. Eileen says she’s doing well and they don’t expect any permanent damage. When she’s gone, Hayden comes back and says she knows what Finn is trying to do. Okay, tell me, because I’m not sure.

Elizabeth tells Jordan about feeling someone push her. Franco tries to interject, but Jordan tells him to back off and let Elizabeth talk. She asks if Elizabeth knows who pushed her and Elizabeth says Hayden.

Oz leaves and Michael goes over to Sonny, saying Teddy requires noise to sleep. I guess putting the television on wasn’t an option. Finn walks into the bar (I so want to make a joke – sorry, we don’t serve aquatic creatures, or something like that) and Joe is right behind him. Joe smiles at Sabrrrina. Come on, can Michael even hold a candle to this guy? He is so Rico Suave. Joe approaches Sabrrrina and Michael. He says it looks like trip to The Floating Rib was just what Teddy needed. Sabrrrina introduces Sonny, and Joe says he knows who Sonny is. He’s the guy who brought Carrrlos back to the states so he could be killed. We’re off to a great start.

Carly tells Bobbie the nanny story and says what a great nanny Nell is, but Bobbie says she knows exactly who could look after Avery. Oh, nice. Nell loses her job and you take her potential new one away.

Jason tells Sam they have a big day ahead of them. Sam says Molly told her it’s bad luck to spend the night before the wedding together, but she’s not big on superstition. She thinks it’s actually good luck. They kiss.

Hayden says Finn was trying to get information to find out when Elizabeth is going to squeal, but she’s not going to be a sitting duck. He asks where she’s going to go. She says she’s going to meet up with her mother in NYC, and she needs to go pack her bags. Finn says he’ll take her.

Jordan asks if Elizabeth saw Hayden before she was pushed, but Elizabeth says it was after she fell. Jordan says if she pushed Elizabeth, wouldn’t it have made more sense for Hayden to disappear? Franco says Hayden wanted to make sure she’d done the job right, and/or to send a message that she can do damage. He says Hayden seemed expressionless, which was kind of creepy, a big deal coming from him. Jordan says no one witnessed the actual assault. Elizabeth says Hayden slapped her during an argument earlier. Jordan asks if anyone saw, and Nurse Eileen appears and says she did. Really? I don’t remember her being there.

Sam is thrilled with the cold sesame noodles Jason brings back. He says they’re going to have two anniversaries, since they’re getting married around their old fifth anniversary. He wonders what the traditional present is for year five. She looks it up on her phone. It’s wood. Lots of jokes floating around everyone’s head, but he hands her the take-out chopsticks and they separate them like a wishbone.

Bobbie suggests that she babysit Avery. Carly says it’s a thankless, day in, day out job. Bobbie says she regrets not having a chance to bring Carly up, but Carly says she doesn’t owe her anything. Bobbie says it’s not out of obligation, but love.

Sonny says he didn’t really want Carrrlos dead; he wanted him to face justice for his crimes. Joe says he understands. He loved his brother, but he needed to pay for what he did. He apologizes for any pain Carrrlos caused. Joe asks to speak to Sabrrrina privately, and then asks her if he can spend more time with Teddy. She says just give her a call. He was afraid she’d say no, but she says Teddy is his family. He asks if they can finish the conversation they started and she says she’s ready to deal with their past.

Eileen tells Jordan that Hayden said something about shutting Elizabeth up. Jordan tells them it’s solid enough to merit further investigation and she’ll keep them posted. After she leaves. Elizabeth says it surprises her that she’s surprised. She didn’t really think Hayden would try to kill her. Griff comes in with her test results.

Elizabeth thought Griff had handed over the case to another doctor. He says the doctor got called out on an emergency, so he’ll go over the results with her. He says she has a mild concussion, some kind of contusion and something with her spleen. Why is it always the spleen? What is the spleen? Franco doesn’t like Griff’s cavalier attitude and wants another doctor. Griff ignores him and says if things keep going well, Elizabeth can be released soon, but they want to keep an eye on her for now. Franco doesn’t like Elizabeth staying in the hospital with the murders going on.

Finn and Hayden drink liquor out of coffee cups outside Perks. She says she guesses this is good-by and he asks her where she’s going.

Nell asks if Carly wants her to stay a few days to help, but Carly says Bobbie just volunteered her services. Nell says who better to watch Avery than her own family. Carly says Nell should be able to get a good job with her references, but Nell says with everyone having gone off to college, all the decent positions are filled already.

Sabrrrina says the past is the past, and she and Joe are just two people who care about her son. He asks if she’s committed to Michael.

Sonny asks Michael what’s on his mind. He says he doesn’t like seeing Sabrrrina with Joe because they have a past. Sonny says Michael is really jealous of her relationship with Carrrlos, and she’ll always have one because he’s her baby daddy. Sonny tells Michael not to let resentment build and he needs to talk to someone or talk to Sabrrrina. Michael says he’s right and Sonny says he always is.

Before Sonny leaves, he tells Joe he doesn’t know why he’s in Port Charles, but his brother caused a lot of trouble for Sonny’s family. Joe says he’s not his brother, but Sonny says he’s a different kind of trouble. He says don’t make the same mistakes Carrrlos did.

Elizabeth asks Franco to leave for a minute while she calls her grandmother to watch the kids. Franco approaches Griff. He asks if Elizabeth is going to be okay. Griff says he should really talk to Elizabeth’s doctor, but with the injuries she has, it’s wait and see.

Jason and Sam start fooling around and the phone rings. It’s Franco. Franco leaves a message for Jason to call him back about Elizabeth.

Sabrrrina explains to Michael that she and Joe were over a long time ago, and there’s nothing between them. Michael asks if Joe knows that, and she says yes. He says seeing them together brought back a lot of his old feelings about Carrrlos. Sabrrrina says she regrets what she did and will for the rest of her life, but she loves Michael and wants a future with him. If he feels like he can’t forgive her, he needs to tell her now.

Sonny gets home and says he didn’t think he’d see Nell there. She says Avery had a hard time getting to sleep and she wants him to know he has an amazing daughter. She says she’ll check in before she leaves and thanks Carly for the ride home. Carly tells Sonny that Bobbie will be the new nanny. He thinks it’s fantastic.

Jason tells Sam the last time he talked to Elizabeth, she said she wasn’t seeing Franco anymore, so he’s ignoring the call. They start to fool around again.

Hayden says if she talks to Finn, he’ll be aiding and abetting. He says that’s what he does for a living. She tells him that she doesn’t want to get him in trouble, and he reminds her that she brought drugs to him in jail. She tells him to take care of himself. He says he’ll try, and she says a wise man once said, there is no trying, just doing, and he realizes she’s quoting Yoda. Hayden asks Finn to spend time with Tracy because she needs someone. Finn talks about their friendship and Hayden says how was she supposed to know they were friends when he kept pushing her away? He says he wishes she wouldn’t leave. They kiss. Lots of that going around today.

Sam and Jason bask in the afterglow and open a fortune cookie. It’s one of those ones I hate that says, “With great work comes great success.” The next one is no better. Jason claims it says they’ll live happily ever after.

Carly tells Sonny the florist is going to be there early. Sonny thinks something is wrong and Carly says she feels badly about sending Nell back to Atlanta when there’s nothing there for her. Sonny says she can be grateful, but not be responsible for Nell’s life. He goes upstairs and Carly calls Nell. She says she wants to discuss Nell’s job hunt, and has a few ideas.

Michael asks if Sabrrrina wants a future with him. She says yes, and he says he wants one with her and Teddy. He says the past is behind them and they need to rebuild the trust they lost. He’s willing to make the effort if she is. They kiss. What’d I say?

Elizabeth tells her grandmother not to tell the kids what happened and she’ll be there as soon as she’s able. Franco overhears and says she’s missing the opportunity for handmade get well cards. She tells him to get some rest. He says he will and lies in the chair next to her. They hold hands. Her face is pretty bruised up, so they can’t participate in today’s kissing theme.

Jordan comes with an officer to arrest Hayden, who says she expected it, but wonders why it isn’t the Feds. Jordan says it’s not their jurisdiction. She’s being arrested for the attempted murder of Elizabeth.

Tomorrow, Finn talks to someone about a mutual friend, Curtis arranges something for Nina, and Jason has a surprise for Sam.

General Hospital – Friday

Nina and Curtis walk in the park. It sounds like Curtis has found a baby momma for Nina.

Franco talks to Elizabeth while she sleeps. He tells her even though the hospital lighting isn’t the best, she’s beautiful. He says whoever did this to her is going to pay, even if it is her sister. Elizabeth stirs and asks him what he said.

In the interrogation room, Hayden nods out and relives the kiss with Finn and her subsequent arrest. She wakes up realizing it’s all real.

Finn gives Hayden’s medical records to a nurse for delivery to the PCPD.

Paul gets a call from Ava, but he says “not today” to his phone. She leaves a message that she hopes he’s not ignoring her, and they need to discuss a game plan if he wants her to keep quiet. The jury selection for Julian’s trial is beginning.

Sabrrrina isn’t looking forward to testifying. Michael tells her to relax and just tell the truth. Monica tells them she’s going to have to miss the big day. What big day?

Oh, she must mean Jason and Sam’s wedding. Sam wants breakfast in bed, but there isn’t time. She suggests they elope, but Jason says as great as it sounds, they’ll disappoint their family.

Carly attends to the last minute details and gives instructions to the photographer. Sonny asks her if she’s overdoing things and didn’t they want it simple, but she says it is simple. I’m with her on this. It’s understated and elegant. She wants it to be about Jason and Sam, and wants them to be as happy as she and Sonny are.

Monica tells Michael not to mention anything to Jason or the kids about what happened to Elizabeth, and then has to explain what happened to Elizabeth. Sabrrrina suggests she stay behind in case Elizabeth needs anything.

Elizabeth asks about the boys and Franco tells her all is fine. He says Monica is going to gather them together later and hr grandmother will explain what happened. Elizabeth says she can’t believe that Hayden tried to kill her. Franco tells her to get some rest and he’ll be back before she wakes up. She thanks him. Wonder how that spleen is doing.

Finn calls Curis, leaving a message that he wants to talk about their mutual friend. Curtis ignores the call. Curtis explains to Nina how to talk to the potential mother. He tells her not to call anything a payment for services, but a payment for expenses. A humongously pregnant girl comes along and introduces herself as Bridget.

Michael and Jake are the first to show up for the wedding. Alexis and her girls are right behind. Alexis heads directly for the champagne, which makes me a little worried about her. Although I would relish seeing Alexis as a raging alcoholic. Sam and Jason show up, hardly dressed in summer casual. He’s wearing a tux and she has on a formal gown with a sparkly bodice.

Sabrrrina brings Elizabeth some magazines. She wonders why Hayden would push Elizabeth down the stairs. Elizabeth says it’s a long, complicated story and she’s just glad Hayden is locked up.

Franco goes to the station to see Hayden. The officer says family and lawyer only. At first Franco says he’s her lawyer (like that was going to work) and then he says he’s there for the family. Finn comes in asking if there’s a problem.

Curtis tells Nina he has faith in her and leaves. She thanks Bridget for coming and they both say how nervous they are. Bridget says she wants her little girl to grow up the best way possible and have a loving home. Nina tells her a little about herself, saying the child will never lack for anything material and she’ll love the baby with all her heart. Bridget lets Nina feel the baby kicking, which blows my theory that maybe Bridget isn’t really pregnant. Ava comes out of nowhere and tells Nina to get her hands off that girl. Ava has a lot of time on her hands. Doesn’t she go to work? Who takes care of the gallery?

Carly says she thought Sam and Jason wanted it casual. Sam says she thought Carly wanted them dressed up and says they’ll change. It just so happens that Jason has clothes in the car and Kristina has another outfit for Sam. If this was you or me, nobody would have anything except an old pair of shorts.

Ava tells Bridget to call the police. Ava says Kiki told her that Nina was drifting back into her baby obsession and wonders what kind of court would allow her to adopt. She realizes that Nina is going to get a baby “off the books.” Nina tries to get Bridget to go somewhere else with her (where’s Curtis?), but Ava says Bridget better keep Nina away from her baby.

Franco calls Finn “Dr. Buddinsky” and tells him to butt out. He tries to give a message to Finn from Hayden’s “family,” but Finn blows him off. The guard tells Hayden her doctor is here. Finn gives her something that looks like ibuprofen, saying it’s medication she needs because she got shot, and lucky her, he’s required to administer it personally.

Paul and Nathan visit Elizabeth. She goes over the timeline for them, remembering that she saw Paul in Monica’s office before she went to the stairs.

Alexis continues to work on the champagne. Sonny asks if she’s made up with Kristina and she says it’s a fragile peace. He mentions that jury selection starts today. She says it hadn’t crossed her mind and picks up another glass.

Ava tells Bridget that Nina is dangerously unstable and tells her about how Nina kidnapped her baby. She calls Nina a lunatic in sheep’s clothing. Nina says it’s not as bad as it sounds. Ava says it is, and Bridget should run away and never let Nina near her baby.

Finn feels responsible, saying if it wasn’t for him, Hayden would have been long gone. She says it’s ironic she’s been arrested for the one crime she didn’t commit. She wonders who would believe it wasn’t her.

Paul suggests Elizabeth’s time frame is off. Elizabeth says she remembers seeing Paul searching through Monica’s desk and he insists he was looking for a pen. Nathan thinks they’re just digressing and asks about the stairs. Monica interrupts, saying Elizabeth has had enough questions for one day. Paul says he hopes she feels better soon and Sabrrrina gives Paul the mother of all soap opera faces as he walks out. I hope Nathan thinks about this real hard, because Paul basically gave himself away by first saying that Elizabeth was mistaken about seeing him and then saying he was in there looking for a pen. Hello? Did no one notice this? Maybe Sabrrrina did and that’s why the face.

Naomi comes to the station. Franco tells her that Hayden has been detained because she tried to murder her sister.

The photographer takes pictures of Sam with her mother and sisters. They all talk about Julian’s trial through clenched teeth smiles and in between the song part. Photos of the guys are taken, and Jason wishes Monica could be there. Just sayin’, but Sam’s new outfit, a chiffon-y white halter number, isn’t that much less dressy than the one she walked in with. Molly insists that Jason and Sam do a kiss photo.

Nina says she has references and Bridget can talk to her therapist. Bridget says she’d rather leave and jets. Ava tells Nina that actions have consequences, and Nina asks when Ava is going to pay for her actions, including Connie’s murder. She tells Ava that she’s a hypocritical, lying bitch. Suddenly, Nathan steps in.

Finn insists Elizabeth will remember that Hayden didn’t push her once her mind clears. He tells Hayden that he can’t pretend to understand their grudge, but he doesn’t think Elizabeth would blame her for something she didn’t do. The cynic in him is working on a contingency plan just in case though. Before he leaves, he tells Hayden to stay positive because it’s better for her immune system. He adds that it might be inappropriate considering the circumstances, but she looks pretty. Aww! Michael Easton is just precious in this role. Much better than the brooding poet he usually is plays. If I want to see Heathcliff, I’ll watch Wuthering Heights. Now he’s a brooding poet with a sense of humor and a bearded dragon.

Naomi tells Franco that Hayden doesn’t have a sister. Franco says he knows Hayden and Elizabeth are half-sisters, sharing Jeff Webber as a father. He tells her he found out from Heather. Naomi says Heather is a lunatic who no one will believe. Franco says maybe, but everyone will believe him and the money can be traced. He tells her everyone is going to know. Naomi says no one is going to know, especially Elizabeth.

Monica complains about being short-staffed. Sabrrrina says her nursing license is still current and offers her services. Monica accepts.

Sam asks where the officiant is and Jason says he has a surprise. He leads everyone to the stairs and Spinelli comes down. Just yesterday, Spinelli became a minister online through the Church of Illuminating Wonders. I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s a real thing.

Ava tells Nathan that his deluded sister was about to buy a baby, and she’s not about to let her get her hands on another one. Nina says she’s changed, but Ava hasn’t, and one day it’s coming back to bite her. Ava says no one has ever proven anything about her, but Nina can’t say the same. She leaves.

Curtis calls Finn back. Finn tells him that Hayden needs their help.

Naomi tells Franco it would destroy her relationship with Hayden (like he cares) and be bad for Elizabeth (okay, she has him there). She says Elizabeth idolizes her father and he’ll be pushed off the pedestal. This is news to me, since we never even hear her talk about Jeff.

Monica looks over Elizabeth’s chart. She says Elizabeth isn’t out of the woods – most likely it’s that spleen thing – but making progress. She says the kids will be told what’s going on after the wedding. Elizabeth is like, what wedding? and Monica tells her Jason and Sam are getting married.

Sam walks down the aisle as invisible violinists play.

Wait, what? Did GH just end on a good note? On a Friday? What happened to my show?

On Monday, Hayden asks if Nina believes her, Ava asks Paul how Julian is going free, and Spinelli tries out his new job, joining Sam and Jason in marriage.

Flipping Out

I also wanted to give a shout out to Flipping Out. I’ve always liked Jeff Lewis, despite his quirky (read pain-in-the-ass) personality. I’m pretty sure I’d even enjoy working for him. He pulls no punches and expects 100% out of his employees, but he works extremely hard, and doesn’t ask anything from anyone that he wouldn’t do himself.

It’s been interesting to watch him grow through life experience as well as therapy. Soon to be a dad with partner Gage, I have no doubt that child is going to lead a charmed life. While his sense of humor is sometimes a little dark for kids, he reminds me of my own father somewhat in that regard, and I’m sure he’s going to make a wonderful parent.

Thursday night’s episode was particularly touching. While he and his housekeeper Zoyla have often butted heads, it seemed like their relationship might have come to an end when Zoyla walked out after an argument. She was scheduled to take care of the house and pets while Jeff and Gage were away on business, and it looked like she wasn’t going to show up, causing everyone to scramble to rearrange plans. Jeff was ready to fire her, leaving her a message that she’d best think carefully about what she’s doing, when returned.

What was beautiful about this episode was the therapy session they had together afterward. Seeing two adults talk out their differences in a reasonable way was amazing enough, but Jeff went on to say how much he cared about Zoyla, something that snarky Jeff rarely does. He told her that it was her choice whether she wanted to continue working for him or retire, but either way he promised he would take care of her for the rest of her life. It was so kind and so loving, I nearly burst into tears. Not something Flipping Out usually does to me. She chose to continue working part time and expressed interest in being involved with the new baby, which he said he definitely wanted. He told her that he loved her and she said she loved him too. It was one of the truly great moments in reality TV that didn’t involve a fight.

Jeff is going to make an awesome daddy!

😟 I also just read that Devious Maids has been canceled and I’m so disappointed. It was a delightful show – smart and funny, intriguing and fun. I’d also liked Eva Longoria ‘s other effort, Telenovela, which unfortunately disappeared after a few episodes. Here’s hoping she continues to toss her hat into the ring until something sticks.

Quotes of the Week

Always remember: If you’re alone in the kitchen and you drop the lamb, you can always just pick it up. Who’s going to know?Julia Child

There is no magic to achievement. It’s really about hard work, choices, and persistence.Michelle Obama

For God’s sake even Superman was Clark Kent. Go to work.Gene Simmons on Dr. Phil, addressing a 44-year-old man who continues to pursue his dream of being a rock star by sponging off of his loved ones.

August 31, 2016 – GH’s Killer Gets Blackmailed, LA’s Briana is About to Pop & NYC’s Reunion Ordeal Begins

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Finn asks Franco what he’s implying about Hayden. He asks why Franco would accuse her of wanting Elizabeth dead. Hayden tells Finn not to pay attention to him, but Franco says Elizabeth has something on Hayden that could put her away. Hayden says Franco is just making things up, but he says he’s not making up a pouch of diamonds that are proof of fraud. I guess telling them that they’re sisters is now out of the question.

Franco leaves and Finn asks Hayden what’s going on. Hayden tells him not to get involved. Finn says he took some things out on her and he was wrong. He says she took a risk for him and he doesn’t want her to leave town. Gee, maybe if you’d said that a week ago, you wouldn’t be having this conversation now. Hayden says she doesn’t know what to do and he tells her to stop doing it on her own and let him help her.

Alexis is at the bar. OMG – so is Julian!

Ava realizes Paul is the hospital killer. Ava wonders why he’d do something like that and says nothing makes sense.

Meanwhile, Paul continues to be the hospital killer, stalking Monica. Luckily her phone rings while she’s in the locker room, but he’s lurking right behind her.

Griff tells Franco they’ve ruled some things out, but Elizabeth isn’t out of the woods. Franco asks what he’s talking about. Griff says they need to run more tests and they take as long as they take. Doctor talk. He says she’s under excellent care and constant attention.

Julian tells Alexis that the powers that be know they belong together. She argues with him and he grabs her arm. Then we see Tracy has her arm. I can’t believe they fooled me again. Alexis asks where Julian went. Tracy says he’s in jail. Alexis swears she saw him, so Tracy calls the PCPD.

Oh! Paul’s phone goes off and startles Monica. Hiding the syringe, he makes something up about why he’s there. She thanks him for all his hard work and leaves. He sees a picture on his phone of him and Ava – he’s putting on cufflinks in the picture. He calls her, thinking that she’s trying to hold their affair over his head, but she says she has something more and to meet her at Perks. He asks where she is now and she says closer than he thinks. She talks to herself, saying now it’s his turn to have his sins come back and haunt him. This is a good one today.

Jordan comes to the hospital. Monica tells her Paul is there already. She’d asked him to come because of the patient that did and he was there in a heartbeat. Yep. He certainly was. Monica says she thought that’s why Jordan was there, but Jordan says she’s there because Elizabeth was supposed to come to the station and never showed up.

Griff tells Franco to talk to Elizabeth when she gets settled in. He believes in second chances and thinks Franco is sincere.

Hayden tells Finn about the diamonds. She says Elizabeth made her so angry, she slapped her, but that’s all. He says he believes her. She says the diamonds were all that was left after the Feds confiscated all the assets, but she never sold them because they were the last thing left from her father. Finn says help him understand how she could be so clueless.

Tracy confirms that Julian is still in jail. She asks how long Alexis has been hallucinating. Alexis says it’s more like a waking nightmare that she’s had since Julian tried to kill her. Tracy brings up the fight she had with Kristina, but Alexis says it was no big deal. Still, she’s terrified Julian will be acquitted because of her.

Paul tells Ava she’d better have a good reason for the meeting. Ava acts silly and tells him they’re in a public place, so don’t try to kill her. She tells him about Jordan calling her in regard to a murder. He tells her the flash drive is safe as long as she testifies against Julian. She says she’s not going to do that and he’s not going to give the flash drive to anyone. He thinks she’s calling his bluff, but she tells him about the cufflink and how she remembered it was his.

Monica tells Jordan how Elizabeth had a nasty fall. She starts to tell Jordan about the power outage, but Franco butts in, saying something about Hayden being responsible.

Hayden tells Finn that she has nothing left. She lied to the Feds, and if Elizabeth turns her in, she’ll go to prison. Finn says Franco is right, if Elizabeth dies, her problems go away. Hayden is aghast that he’d believe she’d kill Elizabeth.

Griff sees a needle in with the dirty scrubs. He carefully removes it.

Franco talks to an unconscious Elizabeth. He says they have a lot to talk about and there’s more to life than just toast. She regains consciousness and asks what happened. She asks about the boys and he says they’re fine. She says she’s sore and he tells her she took a big fall. He asks if she remembers anything.

Tracy says Alexis knows what the jury wants to hear to convict Julian and she has to give it to them. Alexis tells Tracy about how Jordan thought she was still trying to protect Julian and trying to discredit herself.

Paul laughs – ha-ha! – at Ava. He says she can’t prove he ever owned anything like that. She says she does have their video though. In addition to the graphic footage, there’s a clear image of him putting on his cufflinks.

Griff tells Monica about the syringe. He’s given it to the lab for analyzing. He asks about Elizabeth and they both go to check on her. Franco is telling Elizabeth to just concentrate on getting better because he’s not okay with this and thought he almost lost her. She says she’s still here and he says he’s glad. (His characters are so often brooding, it’s nice to see Roger Howarth smile. Although I’d rather see Franco and Nina together.) Griff and Monica come in. Griff says tests are being run and Monica says everyone is rooting for her and to rest. When they’re gone, Franco says everyone in the hospital loves her. Elizabeth starts to remember what happened. She starts to talk about going into Monica’s office, but Franco interrupts, so she skips to the power outage on the stairs. She tells him she felt hands on her back.

Hayden asks if Finn thinks she pushed Elizabeth. He says he didn’t say that, but the argument happened just before Elizabeth fell down the stairs, so what is he supposed to think?

Alexis says if nothing else, Scotty is going to have a field day with how long she waited to say something about Julian. Tracy says that’s okay, he’ll probably make a procedural error, and besides, they have the confession on tape. She says after all Alexis has been through, she’ll blow the jury away just by telling the truth.

Paul balks at the idea a grainy video will bury him. Um…it’s not very grainy. He asks why Ava thinks he’d be behind the killings. She says she spent time in his hotel room tonight and not to be concerned with the how and the why, but what she found. She shows him the pouch with the syringes in it and he makes a great soap opera face. 😨

Hayden tells Finn she wanted to shut Elizabeth up, but not kill her. She says she had something on Elizabeth too. She tells him she was shot last year and the official story was wrong. She says Nicholas hired sometone to kill her and Elizbeth knew about it. Finn’s mind boggles that Hayden still married Nicholas. Hayden says Elizabeth was an accessory after the fact and she was going to make a bargain with her. She says she’s not a murderer. Jordan interrupts saying she’s been looking for Hayden. She tells her that Elizabeth had called saying she had information about Hayden. Hayden says she doesn’t know anything about it and Elizabeth doesn’t clue her in on her plans. Jordan says Franco told her that he found Elizabeth with her in the stairwell. She asks what Hayden was doing before the outage and Finn says she was with him.

Elizabeth realizes she was pushed and wonders who would try to kill her. She says she was going home to get the diamonds and she’d just had a fight with Hayden. Finn got in the middle and told her to go see Monica. Franco says its not a stretch to think Hayden was involved, since when he got there, she was standing over Elizabeth.

Alexis asks Tracy what she’s even doing at The Floating Rib, since its not her usual haunt. Tracy tells her about the disastrous lunch with Dillon and how she saw Alexis talking to herself. She says she knows Alexis is angry and that anger can be motivating. She tells Alexis that it will get better and eventually she’ll have her life back, but testifying is the first step. Tracy leaves to take a call and Julian is back again, telling Alexis that she won’t be able to do it.

Paul says not that it’s Ava’s business, but he has a prescription. She says not for this he doesn’t and it’s something used for surgery. She says she was originally there out of curiosity and found the mother lode. She asks what he’s trying to cover up, who he’s trying to frame, or is he just a psycho? She says he’s done if she decides to go to Jordan. He asks what she wants. This reminds me of the time that Home Depot tried to get over on me, but then realized I had the upper hand. Long roofing story.

Griff tells Monica that the syringe tested positive for whatever that drug is that’s been killing the patients. She wonders if the power outage stopped the killer and Griff says maybe they’re the one who caused it.

Ava says Paul probably made copies of the flash drive anyway, but his silence is a condition of the agreement. She says she knows he’s angry and homicidal, but there’s no reason not to be civilized. And I swear to you, just now Paul called Ava “Anna” and no one caught it or they thought the audience wouldn’t. Ava tells Paul that she also wants Julian to go free.

Alexis says she’ll bury Julian, but he says she can’t, and they’ll be together because they were meant to be. She tells him he’s not really there. Tracy sees her talking to herself again, and Alexis asks what’s happening to her. Tracy says she’s been drinking on an empty stomach. She tells Alexis she’s calling her a cab and she’s to go home, drink some water, take some aspirin and go to bed. If she ends up a whimpering mess, Julian wins, and don’t let him win anything.

Finn tells Jordan that he and Hayden had argued and he was trying to make things right. Jordan says she might need to contact him for more formal questioning and Hayden should expect to be contacted as well. She leaves and Hayden asks why Finn didn’t say anything. He says he doesn’t think she pushed Elizabeth.

Elizabeth tells Franco that Hayden did this to her. Franco says they don’t know that and Elizabeth tells him about the slap. She adds that Finn saw it and says Hayden tried to kill her.

Tomorrow, Jason tells Sam to make a wish, Sonny tells Joe not to make the same mistakes Carrrlos did, and Nell asks Carly if she threatened someone.

Little Women: LA

Briana says she’s about to burst and she’s now as big around as she is tall. She and Matt go out to lunch and discuss having a housewarming or “pre-pop” party. She says if Christy shows up, she’ll call the cops. She’s furious about Christy setting her up at Tonya’s party. Briana says Christy is delusional and she thinks she must be doing something like day drinking or taking drugs. She says Christy has completely changed, and she vacillates between being zen and wired. Matt thinks they should also reveal their baby’s name at the party.

Joe and Terra are doing fun activities with Penny before she has a new brother or sister to torment for the rest of her life. They’re making some kind of craft that involves hand prints, and Penny is not pleased at having her hand dipped in paint. Joe tells her not to worry because she only has 18 more years to live with them.

Since Penny will be behind in physical development, Terra is trying to teach her more words. In her interview, Terra says there’s no scale to measure a little person’s development; everyone is different.

Preston and Elena, who looks stunning in a yellow and black maxi sun dress, sit on the patio while the babies are napping. They discuss their sex life, or lack thereof, since they have to wait six weeks. Elena says she feels like cobwebs are growing on her and she’s counting down the hours. One of the babies starts to cry. There goes relaxation time.

Tonya comes over Terra’s place. Terra wants to wrap up the feud they’ve been having. In her interview, Terra says they’ve been best friends for most of their lives. She tells Tonya that she’s sorry for putting her nose where it didn’t belong and that Tonya is like a sister to her. She starts to tear up and Tonya tells her to stop because she doesn’t want to cry. She says the activewear line is like her baby and there’s a difference between critiques and throwing shade. She’s also annoyed that Terra drug Elena into it.

Terra says she hadn’t expected Elena to make things worse. She tells Tonya that it upset her to see Tonya talking to Christy about it. Terra switches topics by saying she gets the feeling there’s been a disconnect between Tonya and Angelique since Kerwin moved in. She tells Tonya that Angelique feels like she settled. In her interview, Tonya is bothered that Angelique would tell Terra something like that before she came to her. Tonya accepts Terra’s apology, but insists she hasn’t settled.

Autumn and Christy are taking a yoga class. In her interview, Christy says yoga ain’t easy for a dyslexic dwarf, and that you’re not going to be a good parent unless you’re embarrassing your kid. My father would probably concur about the latter. After class, Christy tells Autumn that her grandfather could have colon cancer. They say they’re each other’s best friend.

The girls go to an ice cream parlor where you ride a bike to churn your own ice cream. Cool! Both literally and figuratively. Tonya tells everyone that she and Terra have reconciled. Elena says she was hurt by Tonya blowing her off at the party and feels like she can’t speak her mind. Tonya thinks once Elena actually sees her activewear, she’ll be impressed.

Tonya asks how everyone is feeling about Briana and Matt, since their party is coming up. Jasmine says that Matt makes her uncomfortable, but she doesn’t want it to cause another rift.

Jasmine and Chris walk on the beach. She says they won’t be able to have much alone time after the baby comes. She’s worried about Briana and Matt. Chris suggests she stay out of their business. Jasmine thinks that Matt needs to understand how she feels so they can move on. She says he has a hot temper and doesn’t mince words, so she’s concerned about approaching him.

Tonya and Angelique take a flying class. Not that kind of flying, but those circles and fabric swatches people twirl around on. During a break, Tonya tells Angelique that she and Terra made up. She mentions what Terra told her in regard to Angelique’s feelings about Kerwin. Angelique says it’s a big change and she feels like she got no warning. She loves them, but feels like her opinions and feelings have been disregarded. She starts to cry and Tonya apologizes. Tonya figured since Angelique was grown, it wouldn’t be a big deal and didn’t realize she needed to adjust. Tonya asks why Angelique feels like she’s settling. Angelique says that Kerwin moving in seemed to come out of the blue. Tonya says every love story is different and their timing hadn’t been good up until then. She says she’ll never put a man before her child though. They hug it out.

Todd and Christy look at outdoor plants for their new house. Todd wonders if getting Christy’s dad involved in gardening might be a good idea. She says her dad has pre-cancerous cells in his esophagus and they need to do more testing on his colon. It’s upsetting to hear her mother talk about chemo and radiation. Todd suggests putting off his search for his birth parents so they can concentrate on her father. Christy thinks all the more reason not to wait, since there could be health issues in Todd’s family that he should know about.

The pre-pop/housewarming party begins. Briana is having mild contractions, but says she’s had them before and isn’t too concerned. Elena looks fabulous for someone who just had twins, but these girls always look well put together. Jasmine is anxious about talking to Matt, since she doesn’t know what his reaction will be, but feels like she can’t hold back any longer.

Jasmine asks Matt if she can have a word. She says she was there for him and fought for him, and the things he did with other women were disgusting. She wants to be supportive of Briana, but doesn’t want things to be awkward with Matt. Matt tells her that he hopes with time he can show everyone that someone can change. He tears up and says he wants to set a good example for his children. Jasmine says that if he’s who Briana chooses, she has to accept that. He thanks Jasmine for being a good friend to Briana throughout.

Jasmine tells the girls about the conversation. In her interview, Terra thinks Jasmine is taking it all too much to heart and Briana is the one who has to sleep with him.

Time to eat. Jasmine asks Briana about Christy setting her up for the process server to find her at the party. Briana says she’s disgusted with Christy and she’ll never be friends with her again. She thinks Christy is trying to take attention away from something going on in her own life. Elena wonders if it was just a coincidence. Terra brings up how Christy almost got her arrested and Jasmine says it’s been a chain of events. Terra thinks Christy is trying to get back at Briana for cutting her out of the loop.

Briana wonders if Christy is on something. Terra says that she and Tonya had discussed if Christy was on drugs. Briana says she doesn’t seem like the same Christy. In her interview, Terra talks about Christy repeatedly taking what she said was ibuprofen a year ago, although she doesn’t think it was ibuprofen. Elena is distressed that the allegations are so big.

Game time. The guests pick a cupcake with a letter of the alphabet on it. All together they will form the name. Maverick Jax. Okay, I’m good with that. All of a sudden, Briana says her pain is at a 10 and it’s close to how she felt the last time she went to the hospital. She’s not supposed to have her c-section for another two weeks. Terra says she could die if she tries to deliver naturally. Briana decides to go to the hospital. She’s more worried about the baby than the pain, not knowing if these are contractions or the baby is in distress. Matt gets her into the car.

Tonya says the baby is about to come. Everyone watches as the car drives away.

This season is chock full o’ fun – an amusement park, archery, bowling, Penny poops, Briana delivers, Christy is confronted and Terra is hospitalized.

The Real Housewives of NYC – Reunion Part One

Andy says hello to the ladies and they answer back like it’s an AA meeting. No shock, everyone looks fabulous. I especially love Dorinda’s white and silver dress that looks like a snowflake. Bethenny’s divorce is finally coming to a close after five years, but she’s not discussing her latest boyfriend. Jules, who is in the process of a divorce, isn’t talking about that either.

We start with Dorinda and flash back to the stupidity of John. Dorinda wears those humongous chain earrings a lot. She’s like, thanks a lot for making me relive that again. Bethenny says her hat’s off to Dorinda for putting her life out there. The Countess asks if John watched the show. Dorinda says he tried to justify his behavior at first, but she told him he was an a-hole and he accepted the mantle.

A fan asks what Dorinda thinks rubs people the wrong way about John. She says her husband was very different, visually as well as intellectually, and she traveled in a different circle, so people aren’t used to it. Sonja says a bunch of stuff that boils down to John not having social skills. The bra party is brought up. Andy asks Bethenny if she was referring to coke when she sarcastically asked if John wanted to “blow some lines.” She says she was, and Dorinda says Bethenny doesn’t know their life. Bethenny doesn’t want the question to go any further. Dorinda asks why Bethenny would insinuate that she does drugs and Sonja says everyone knows she does. What? Andy just moves on and I’m like, hey, go back.

They talk about Bethenny’s birthday party and how she ran from John. Bethenny says her problem is that she can’t pretend, and it makes social situations awkward. Ramona gets a turn on the John bandwagon and we flash back to that drunk guy that John tried to kick out of the party. Then we move to The Countess because she dated that guy. Ramona is asked why she wanted him to stay, and she acts clueless. Andy asks Dorinda about where she thinks her relationship is going and she says they’re both happy the way things are. I’m very distracted by the decor – silver pillows on a plum velvety couch, winter berries in vases and some beautiful pink martini and wine glasses stacked in the background. Andy said they were at The Diamond Horseshoe in Times Square, which I assume is a chic bar.

Ramona’s turn. She’s single and ready to mingle. We flash back to her many moments of flirtatiousness. In one of them, I notice a lady in the background at a restaurant noticing the cameras. My favorite part is when Ramona mispronounces reggae as ra-gay, emphasis on the gay. Andy asks if there’s anyone special, but she says she’s just dating a lot. Dorinda says she went from trapping to hunting. Andy says viewers have seen her as “lighter” this season. She talks about her and Mario going back and forth for a while before they finally divorced. She had always been the caregiver when no one took care of her. I will say, she didn’t really scream and yell at anyone this time around. It’s Groundhog Day when we go back to the pronunciation of reggae and then we move on to The Countess’s way of pronouncing things that’s totally her own.

Dorinda is asked for a review of the guys that Ramona’s been dating, but she’s not talking. She and Sonja get in an argument about how Dorinda feels about Ramona’s dating life. Andy asks how Ramona’s daughter feels about her newly single mother. They all talk about Ramona’s new ta-tas and how great she looks.

We revisit Dorinda’s holiday weekend in the Berkshires. The Countess and Bethenny bicker in those little corner squares while we watch Bethenny rip The Countess a new one during dinner. It culminates with Dorinda’s “I did it nice” speech. Andy asks if there’s a curse on her parties with the women. We go over The Countess’s claim that Bethenny copied her hairstyle. Andy asks for a show of hands, but there are no takers. They discuss Dorinda’s birthday cake. Andy says her kitchen monologue was gripping. Dorinda says at that point she just wanted to be a mother and stop the arguing and I agree – she did sound like someone’s mother. Or that guy in West Side Story who says “You kids! Why do you live like there’s a war on?” Apparently, her tirades have their own Twitter name – dornadoes.

Andy mentions that The Countess acted self-centered when Jules tried to tell her about her father being sick. The Countess says she apologized and Jules says she wasn’t offended since they talk all the time. Bethenny is called out about slut-shaming The Countess. We flash back to the married man thing in Turks and Caicos. The Countess claims he was getting divorced. Pfft! That’s what they all say. She says Bethenny is a hypocrite because Bethenny is dating a married man right at this very minute. She didn’t really say that last part, but I thought it sounded more dramatic.

The Countess says when Bethenny started dating him, he had been married and living at home. I assume she means with his wife and not his parents. The Countess asks what married man she’s slept with, and Bethenny asks who hasn’t she slept with, and Carole adds if The Countess doesn’t know, how would she know? Bethenny jokes that she’s going to come out with a Slutty Girl line.

Andy asks if Bethenny’s boyfriend left his wife for her and she says no. She actually called his wife, who she’d gone to high school with, to make sure everything was cool. The Countess keeps whispering to the others on the other couch. Andy moves back on topic and Bethenny says she called his wife while she was still only friends with him to get a time stamp. Bethenny says if slut-shaming is noticing that The Countess writes etiquette books, but then acts like a whore when she’s out, that’s what she’s doing. Alrighty then!

Andy points out that Bethenny said she liked the new, freewheeling Countess during the last reunion. Bethenny says she got a little too free, swiping men out from under their women’s noses. A fan says that Bethenny is disrespectful to her co-stars and then acts repentant. The Countess says the remorse isn’t genuine and we go back to Bethenny dating a married man because no one can ever let anything go.

Bethenny whips out her phone to call her boyfriend’s daughter. Someone always whips out something. Bethenny asks the daughter if anyone in the family believes she was dating her father while he was married. The daughter confirms that’s a no. She actually talks for a while, but you can’t hear it above the bickering going on.The Countess says the daughter is just defending her father and there’s a mini-debate about whether daughters are more defending of their mothers or fathers. The Countess calls Bethenny a horrible, evil person and Bethenny calls her a liar.

Next time – part two – The Countess loses her title, Bethenny accuses Jules of using the show as a vehicle for her divorce, Tom and Sonja are discussed and Ramona whips out evidence. Told you.

I’m also watching The Real Housewives of Melbourne, although I started late because they snuck it in on me. I like this one because the women are all loud and literally larger than life, reminding me of transvestites, and I mean that in a good way. They wear lavish outfits, throw lavish parties, argue incessantly, and go to places like Dubai, a city I’m fascinated with, but would be scared to actually travel to. I love seeing Australia as well. That’s another place I’d love to visit, but can’t imagine a plane ride that long. This season, we were also treated to a the wedding of Gamble Breaux (yes, that’s her name) on a beach in New South Wales. I recommend this one – if you can keep track of it.