What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

At Charlie’s, Curtis says Stella was attacked for her opposition to the redevelopment. Jordan adds that a lot of people don’t want it to go through. Julian tells them when Alexis is in office, all their efforts will be for nothing. Molly shows Alexis the article from The Invader entitled Con Job, about Alexis asking for Nora’s help to spring Julian. Julian asks if Alexis is all right, and she shows him the phone.

Olivia goes blah-blah-blah about how taxes paying for everything is wonderful, because she doesn’t have to worry about paying them. She tells Ned that making a city and people’s lives better is patriotic. He got into the election to make the people’s lives in Port Charles better, and she believes he’ll get that chance. The article comes in on her phone. Monica comes in, saying it’s too close to call, but not all the precincts are in yet. Michael joins them, and says he’s proud to have voted for Ned, whether or not he wins. Ned thinks his odds might be improving.

Elizabeth tells Franco that she’s going to Charlie’s where the nurses who support Alexis are gathering. She thinks it’s going to be a long night. Franco leaves for his session with Doc, and Elizabeth runs into Kim. Kim tells her that she’s never walked down the aisle, and never missed it, but seeing Elizabeth’s smile is making her reconsider. Elizabeth says she’s walked down the aisle a few times, and hopes this one is the charm.

Entering Charlie’s, Stella says she wants to put her feet up and get a glass of champagne. Curtis asks Molly if everything is okay, but Molly says, not even close, and shows him her phone. Stella wants to talk to Alexis, but Curtis thinks that’s not the best idea at the moment. She asks what she’s missing. Finn tells Alexis that he came to support her night of triumph, but she says there might not be any triumph on Charles Street tonight.

Franco goes to Doc’s office. He asks where the brain in a jar is, and Doc tells him that Faison’s brain is being biopsied; he’s waiting for the results. Franco thinks his brain might be worse. Faison was never a childhood killer. He wishes he could say the same.

Sam and Drew arrive at Charlie’s. Sam asks what’s going on, and Molly tells her to ask Julian. Julian is on the phone with Scotty, and tells him to keep trying. He tells Alexis that Scotty said it’s too late to block the publication; it’s out there. They see there’s breaking news on the television. Molly looks at her phone, and reads out loud about Alexis’s visit to Nora leading to Julian’s release.

At the Quartermaine’s, Michael also reads out loud. The article asks if Alexis is taking a truly principled stand or just trying to save her ex-husband’s pub, which is a possible front for mob activity. What else is she hiding in her history of involvement in organized crime. Monica doesn’t believe it for a minute, Olivia doesn’t care. She says Alexis has been high and mighty. If pulling strings for Julian’s release cost her the election, maybe she deserves it.

Elizabeth asks if Kim wants to come. She’d love to, but has to go with other camp. Oscar was invited to the Quartermaine’s, and she thought he should spend time with his new family. Elizabeth says that politicians come and go, but family is forever.

Doc wants to do word association, and says, family. Franco wonders if he’s sure he wants to ask that, and was hoping for more like a stream of consciousness where he figures it out. Doc says that’s so much work; he’d rather play word games. He reminds Franco that they don’t have a typical doctor/patient relationship. Franco is supposed to be helping him with his research, and Doc will help Franco with his past. He says, family, and Franco says, feathers. His mom was constantly dusting, and used a feather duster; she cleaned compulsively. Doc asks if he felt as if she was cleaning up after him and Andrew, and Franco admits they were a lot to handle. Doc asks if they were ever punished, but Franco doesn’t remember. He says she was more like a total pushover. She let him get away with murder.

Phones are ringing, and everyone says, no comment. Olivia says the article went viral, and Monica says that every reporter in town wants a reaction. Ned tells them to stick with no comment. Monica says whether it’s true or false, it’s up to Alexis to comment. The bell rings, and Michael answers. It’s Nelle. Monica tells her that she’s glad she could make it; her timing couldn’t be more perfect.

Sam tells Molly that once again their mom is paying the price for being involved with Julian. Molly tells Alexis to refute it, but Alexis says she can’t. The innuendo that she’s involved with the mob is patently false, but everything else is true.

Elizabeth joins everyone at Charlie’s. She tells Alexis that she heard, but not to worry; no one will believe it. Alexis says in this instance, it’s correct. She was trying to seek justice for someone far from perfect, but wrongly convicted. Julian wasn’t a willing accomplice, but under duress. He was menaced in prison, and she was trying to seek his release. She got Nora to convince Olivia-J to tell the truth, and he was released based on her testimony. Stella says it sounds like she set right a wrong, and admires her honesty. She thinks once the truth is heard, everyone will feel that way. She’s going to the polls to do damage control, and Molly decides to go with her. Jordan tells Julian it almost sounds like collusion. He thinks she might want to investigate who put this out at the eleventh hour. It’s sabotage, and someone will pay.

Nelle thanks Monica for including her. Michael asks for a word with Monica, but the bell rings again. It’s Kim and Oscar. Kim says it’s still too close to call, but Monica says maybe not for too long. Ned thinks it’s too late for the article to have made a difference, but Olivia-Q says there are still a few key districts that vote late.

Jim tells Alexis if it goes her way, he hopes they can find common ground. It’s no secret they’re on opposing sides, and he hopes they can overcome their differences. He wonders what’s with the long faces, and Julian asks what he’s doing there. Jordan says the polls are closed. Jim tells Julian he’s there to get a drink; was it something he said? Julian says, like he doesn’t know about The Invader hatchet job just in time to sway voters. Curtis says it ain’t over yet. Finn tells Alexis that he’s not a glass-half-full kind of guy, but she still has a chance. Alexis wonders why she doesn’t feel that way. Curtis tells Drew he wants to talk about something other than politics, and Drew suggests talking about him and Franco.

Doc tells Franco that he didn’t commit murder. Franco says he just wasn’t successful. Betsy sent Drew to an orphanage to keep him safe. Doc says Betsy wasn’t always honest, and wonders why Franco will accept the worst about himself. Why believe the worst without knowing if it’s true?

Ned says the exit polls are showing that he’s gaining support. Kim admits to voting against Measure A, but Olivia says she should vote her conscience. She explains to Kim that Julian is Leo’s biological father. Kim says she and Julian are friends. Olivia gives Kim her phone, and says she should nip the friendship in the bud. The doorbell rings, and Monica says it could be reporters. Ned says if they want a statement, they’ll get a statement. He answers the door, and Julian flies in, shoving Ned up against the wall.

Ned swears he didn’t leak the story, adding that Alexis didn’t deny it. Michael tells Julian that he’s trespassing, and he assaulted a political candidate in front of witnesses. He has one chance to leave. Olivia tells him that if he doesn’t, he’ll never see Leo again. Kim tells him that one black eye in the family is enough, and to back off for Leo’s sake.

Sam tries to make suggestions to Alexis, but Finn says Alexis knows what she needs. Sam asks what makes him an expert. He says he voted for her, and he wouldn’t vote for just anybody.

Curtis tells Drew that Jim is a big money dude, trying to play by intimidating the residents, and one is his auntie. He doesn’t like him. Drew says that Jim knew him and Franco when they were kids; Betsy dated him. Curtis says, now he’s here. It’s a helluva coincidence.

Franco tells Doc this isn’t what he signed up for. Doc tells Franco that he’s trying to get him to separate fact from fear, and imagination from reality. He asks if that’s the only time Franco tried to hurt Drew or were there other incidents. Franco isn’t sure. Doc tells him breathe, and think back. He’s not Franco; he’s Bobby. He asks what Bobby and Andy liked to do; what games did they play? Franco says, hide and seek. He remembers Drew hiding in a trunk, and him locking it. Drew yells for Franco to let him out. Doc asks what he remembered.

Kim tells Ned the reporters will be there wanting the next headline about them. Ned tells Julian that if he’s done making an ass of himself, he knows where the door is. Julian says, the hell with you, Ted. The others go back into the living room, but Kim stays behind. She calls Julian “Charlie,” and tells him to wait.

Finn says he doesn’t know about Alexis, but he could use drink. She tells him for someone who doesn’t speak at meetings, he knows what to say to her. She thinks a martini would be great, and they go over a list of various drinks. She says it would be great to numb world. Finn says for couple of hours, but then in the morning…  She says she’s going to lose, isn’t she? She didn’t even know she wanted the job until Laura stepped down. Then she got invested. She would have made great mayor. Finn says he believes it; he voted for her. She says she should have known better; it was a ticking time bomb. He says in retrospect, full disclosure earlier would have given her control of the narrative. She says there would have been no way to spin it. She made her choice to get entangled with Julian. She keeps making the same mistake over and over. She says it’s the definition of insanity to do that, and expect a different outcome. She’s incapable of making healthy a choice when comes to Julian. She can’t let go or move on. Finn puts his arm around her.

Julian tells Kim that as much as he wanted to punch Ned, it would have been the wrong thing to do. He says now that she saw the article, she knows who is who, and what he is. She tells him that he didn’t make it a secret. He thought it was his last chance to get it right. Buying the pub, putting down roots, making friends, and trying to get it right with the kids, showing them he’d changed. The article proves he can’t erase the past. He’s trapped in his name and history, and anyone else foolish enough to get close will be too. She asks if it’s a warning, but he says it’s a fact. Just ask his ex-wife. Kim says she’s driving. He asks where, and she tells him that he knows.

Curtis says Jim is arrogant, smug, and the definition of power and privilege. He’s in it for the money. Drew thinks there’s something more, and angle he’s just not seeing. Curtis asks what’s up with him and Franco. Drew says since Jim has been in town, Franco has been acting weird. He’s been carrying around a rabbit’s foot that inexplicably means something to him. He wants to find Betsy, and get to the bottom of what’s up with Jim. Curtis says he messed with the wrong dudes, and he can’t wait to take his ass down.

Franco tries to leave, saying he doesn’t want to see Elizabeth disappointed. He starts to tear up, and Doc says whatever he remembers, he can’t lock it inside. Let him help unlock the past and free him from it. In Franco’s mind, Drew cries to be let out of the trunk. Franco tells Doc that Pandora’s Box unleashed all the evils of the world, and the moral is, don’t open the box. Doc reminds him that the box also contained hope.

Michael tells Monica that he appreciate her effort with Nelle, but what Monica thinks is inclusive, Nelle might take as encouragement. The winner is about to be announced, and everyone gets ready.

Kim and Julian get to Charlie’s. Curtis thinks Alexis can still pull it off. Drew looks at Jim. The winner is declared to be Ned. Bleh. Nelle says she’s proud to be part of the family, and hugs Michael. Ned asks Oscar what he makes of it, and Oscar says he’s now related to the mayor.

Jim sees Franco going into Charlie’s, and tells him the way things going, it looks like he’s sticking around Port Charles. Julian tells Kim that he’s just making things worse, but Kim says he belongs there. Drew stares at Franco. Franco thinks about him being locked in the chest. Elizabeth asks what going on.

About to light a cigar in the alley, Jim is startled by Curtis. Curtis tells him smoking is bad for you, and so is standing in an alley all alone. His aunt got mugged recently, and it bothers him a lot.

Ned is grateful for the support, and blah-blah-blah, his wife, blah-blah-blah. The people have spoken. He’s honored and humbled, and won’t let them down. He says the city is a living thing, and is better when they come together to improve it, blah-blah-blah. Molly says she can’t watch. Stella tells her it’s not about how many times we get knocked down, but now many times we stand up. Jordan agrees, and Stella thanks Jordan for backing her up.

Ned pledges to work with the business community to revitalize Charles Street.

Curtis tells Jim it’s been a big night, and the article was right on time. Jim realizes that Curtis is a friend of “Andy’s,” and Curtis tells him that his name is Drew. He says good luck with that smoking thing, and leaves.

Ned gives a shout out to Laura, who might have been standing there. His commitment to Charles Street is no less than hers.

Doc talks into a recorder. He says Franco has a fascination and fear about his childhood. Noting unusual there, but he has the belief that he was born bad, and that murder is in his DNA. Is it? Or is Franco still Bobby the child, playing hide and seek with himself?

Ned says to those who are afraid to walk the streets at night, he’s bringing law and order back to Port Charles. Those who do harm will be punished to the full extent of the law.

Franco drains a water bottle, saying he was really dehydrated. He leaves with Elizabeth.

Ned says blah-blah-blah, the love and support of his family, and introduces Olivia. He says they need to come together as a city and as neighbors. With all their differences, there’s more that unites than divides them. The work begins today; the dream goes on.

Sam is sorry, but Alexis says she’ll be fine, and thanks Sam and Drew for their support. Drew tells her to let them know if she needs anything. Finn helps her on with her coat, and she tells him she’s just waiting for everyone to leave so she can cry like a baby. Julian tells Kim there’s nothing he can say or do, and she agrees. She says she can make him a drink. Alexis tells Finn she needs to get out of there. He says they can do that, and gives her his arm. They walk out, and we see Alexis’s campaign flyers on the ground.

Tomorrow, Oscar wants a favor from Julian, Lulu resigns, and Maxie is the one who needs to do this.

The Haves and the Have Nots

The guards separate Quita and Candace. Candace calls Quita a crackhead, and I laugh. DA George wants to talk to Candace, and has her brought to the interrogation room. She has nothing to say to him, but he says he’ll talk. He tells her she’s too feminine to be such an animal. What? He wants to talk to her about Quincy and the charges for his murder. She says she wasn’t charged with anything. He asks if she wants to see what they have, and she asks if he wants to go to hell. He says, no actually. I’m kind of liking George; his banter is amusing. He shows her some new evidence – Jeffrey’s bracelet that was found with the body. She says they found a body without a warrant, and it can’t be used. He says a witness is enough, and they have Jeffrey, who seems to be under a lot of pressure. He asks if she’s going to let Jeffrey go down for what she did. He’s sure the bracelet has DNA all over it. She says it won’t see the light of day, but he tells her it will when Jeffrey testifies. Moving on, he says the old man said he made a mistake, and nothing will be on record; she’s free to go. He thinks she must have friends in high places.

Jeffrey is brought in, and sits across from Candace. He looks pretty tired. He asks why he’s there, and she says they’re playing games. She says they think they’re stupid, and he says, one of them anyway. She reminds him that they’re recording everything. He can’t believe his mother turned him in, and Candace can’t believe he’s shocked, especially since he didn’t do anything. Jeffrey wonders why Veronica didn’t turn Candace in, and asks what Candace promised her. Candace says Veronica didn’t turn her in because there’s nothing to turn her in for. He says he hopes he doesn’t find out that she and Veronica are in cahoots against him, and she calls him paranoid. She says they’re not talking in here because that’s what they want. He says she wants to control him like his mother does, but they’ll see. She says Jeffrey knows her, and to STFU. A woman tells Candace she’s free to go, and Jeffrey says, see you soon.

A woman at the desk tells Candace, no bail, no phone call, no record; who did that? As Candace is about to leave, David stops her. He says his son is in a jail cell for her crime; she got him into this. Candace says his wife did that. He says she knows Jeffrey didn’t hurt that boy. It was her that he was trying to help, and she needs to take responsibility so he can be exonerated. She ask if he thinks that’s going to happen, and he says she doesn’t have a shred of decency. She agrees. She asks if he knows Oscar, the guy he hired to play with her emotions and steal her money. David says it was Jim’s money. Candace says apparently he does know Oscar, and payback is a bitch.

Nameless woman friend asks if Landon is hungover; she is. He says she looks it. She wonders if this is his way of getting back at her for telling the truth. Landon doesn’t have a good poker face, and Charles is going to know he’s in love with him. He asks her how Senator Johnson is, and how’s his wife? She tells him it’s a low blow, but not as low as he’s willing to blow. Good one. She says if he can’t handle truth, maybe they shouldn’t be friends. He tells her that she can’t handle him talking about her and the senator, and she says, as much as he can’t handle her talking about him and the future president. Please, if you’re reading this, and know this character’s name, let me know what it is. I’ve worn myself out trying to find it, and for whatever reason, Landon never uses it. Maybe she doesn’t have a name.

Hanna tells Derek a funny story. He says it’s good to see her smile. He says she was so sad when he was at her house, he wanted to grab her and hug her. She’s glad he didn’t; she would have freaked out. She asks if he doesn’t have work, but he says he was done. She tells him that she has to help out upstairs. He wants to take her to dinner, since she said the tea replaced their coffee date. After some hesitation, she says okay, and he says tomorrow night. She doesn’t want to go anywhere fancy, since she has nothing to wear, but he says he’ll take her wherever she wants to go.

Kathryn pretends to be looking at a magazine when Hanna walks in. Hanna says she saw her run, and don’t tell her she wasn’t listening. Kathryn asks if they’re going on a date, and Hanna says yes. Kathryn wonders about her not having any clothes, and Hanna reminds her about the fire. Kathryn wants to give her a makeover; she can use some tweaking. Her ladies will have her knock his socks off. Hanna says Derek has to take her as she is. She heads upstairs, and Kathryn says she’s calling her glam squad.

Quita gets sprung, and Oscar stops her outside. He tells her that he’s her godfather; he just bailed her ass out. She has something he needs. She tells him to get lost, and he says she can go back in if she doesn’t want to talk to him. She asks where he wants to do it, but he wants the card she stole from Wyatt. She’s not telling him anything, but when he threatens to have her sent back in, she says she had it, but not anymore. He asks some questions, and she doesn’t know much; just that it was a lot of money in an offshore account. He gives her five hundred dollars, and says he may need more information. He gives her his number in case she thinks of anything. She says she’ll do his white ass for that much, but he just wants the info. When she’s gone, an officer asks if Oscar had any luck, but no. Oscar says he’ll give him a grand if he does something else.

David calls Veronica, but she doesn’t want to talk to him. He says they need to do something about their son, and she says she already did. She calls Jeffrey that girl, and says she did him a favor. David wonders if she’s drinking, and says he needs her sober to talk. She asks if he had her run off the road; she knows it was him, Kathryn, or Jim. He wants to talk about their son, and doesn’t know what she’s talking about She says when she finds out, she’ll come after him. He says she had Jeffrey arrested for something Candace and her brother did. Veronica says when finds that woman, she’ll send her back to David in pieces. David says she’d better not, and he’s tired of playing games. She’s tired of the conversation, and hangs up.

Wyatt calls the bank and wants to know how to get his money. He’s really talking to Oscar, who says he needs a police report before he can be reimbursed. Wyatt says he’ll come to the station, and Oscar asks if he can give him an hour, adding that he’s at the eleventh precinct. As soon as he hangs up, Oscar jets out the door.

Mitch goes to the family restaurant with Benny, and introduces him to his Uncle Vinnie. He wants to talk about something. Vinnie asks if he’s in trouble, but Mitch says it’s something else. Benny needs a loan. Vinnie says, no disrespect, but he looks like he can’t back it up. Mitch says it’s because he’s Black, and Vinnie is like, your point? Mitch says Benny’s sister brought them War, and Vinnie says they owe her one. Benny wonders for what, and Mitch says he’ll tell him later. Benny says he needs a tow truck; he lost his. Vinnie asks if it got towed. BA-DUM-CHH! Benny tells Vinnie that he needs forty-five grand, and Vinnie says he can do that at 25% interest, which is a discount. All payments are to be in cash; $18k every six months. Vinnie tells Mitch to tell Benny what happens if he can’t do it, and Mitch says he’s good. Vinnie says, it’s done, and hands Benny a stack of cash out of the load he’s counting. Benny asks if he needs to sign anything, and Vinnie says the only ink there is blood; remember it. As they’re leaving, Mitch tells Benny that it’s easy to get, but harder to pay off. Benny’s phone rings. It’s Veronica, who wants him to come over. Jeffrey told her husband about burying Quincy’s body, and she needs to talk to him. He says he’ll be right there.

Candace goes to David’s house. Erica answers the door, saying she should be there. Candace says he won’t be home any time soon; he’s trying to get his son out of jail. Erica asks how she is, and Candace asks if she wants a slap. Erica says she doesn’t have the money, and Candace says she doesn’t want her to get it; it’s too soon. Erica says that’s what she thought, and Candace says she didn’t tell her to think. She wants Erica to get every account number she can find. She wants it all. Everything; the insurance policy numbers, his mother’s maiden name, and his blood type, and don’t take forever. Candace asks why David wants Erica to stay. Erica tells her that she made up a lie about an abusive ex. Candace says it won’t work for long, and tells Erica that she doesn’t have much time.

Landon tells Charles he’s on fire; they love him. Charles says it will be a long four years, but Landon insists it will be eight. He starts to take off Charles’s shoes, and Charles says he’s got this. Landon tells him resisting makes it harder. Charles asks, resisting what? and Landon says everything that comes with being president. Charles says he needs Landon’s help. He wants his kids to have as much normalcy as possible, and doesn’t want the press hounding them. Landon says he’ll help, and with anything else at any time.

Wyatt goes to the police station. He tells the desk sergeant that he needs to file a report. Oscar is sitting in the waiting area. Wyatt is lead to a room in the back, and the officer that Oscar bribed comes in. He introduces himself as Jonathan Holmes, and gives Wyatt paperwork to fill out. He asks for Wyatt’s cell phone, telling him it will make things easier if he can get information from it. In the hallway, he gives Oscar the phone, and Oscar gives him the cash.

Sarah goes to Jim’s hotel room. She gives him all the evidence, and he says, good girl. She asks if they’re even now; she could go to jail. He says she won’t, and asks if his son’s testimony is the only thing left. She tells him it is. He says he’d like to be there when the DA finds out, and Sarah says she wouldn’t. Jim tells her she’s boring him, and to go home

Veronica’s doorbell rings. She tells Melissa she’s getting sick of her, and Melissa says she’s sick of Veronica too. Veronica grabs her wrist, and says, if it weren’t – and Melissa finishes, for her carrying her grandchild. She knows. Benny comes in, and Veronica says they need to talk. Melissa tells her to go in the kitchen; she’s not moving, and tells Benny to watch out. Veronica goes upstairs with Benny.

Veronica tells Benny that Jeffrey told them everything. He could be in a lot of trouble. Tampering with evidence, destroying a corpse; they’re serious charges. He says he can’t go to jail, and she says she’ll handle it. The body is inadmissible, so it should be okay. He says, easier said than done, but all right. She starts coming on to him, and he calls her Mrs. Harrington. He starts taking off his clothes, and says he should be getting bills for this. Veronica says he’ll be paying her.

David comes in, and asks Melissa where Veronica is. Melisa says she’s in her room; she’ll show him. She leads David upstairs. The door is locked, but Melissa produces a key, ignoring David’s suggestion of knocking first. They walk in, and Veronica and Benny are going at it. Melissa says, uh-oh, and David just stands there, frozen.

Next time, Jeffrey tells Justin that he’s not going with him, George says the bullets match, and Benny wants to fight David.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Dorit complains that it’s raining on the day of the party. LVP says it won’t ruin anything, and we flash back to her own cover shoot. Giggy! Dorit tells us that Bella magazine told her that she embodies what the magazine represents.

Camille meets Teddi at a restaurant. Her daughter is walking in a fashion show, and she thinks she’s more nervous than Madison. Kyle joins them, and they order some food. Kyle asks about the dinner. Teddi says Dorit gave the narration to LisaR about what’s happened in the past few weeks, including the issue at the beach house. Kyle wonders why make such a big thing about it? Teddi says she threw LVP under the bus too, telling LisaR about her leaving dinner. She alluded that LVP gets jealous of Kyle and Dorit’s friendship. Kyle says LVP will be hurt by that. Teddi says if she slipped up like that, she’d be calling her.

While walking through the park, Dorit says she values and loves LVP as one of her best friends. They never discussed the dinner, but LVP doesn’t want to go over it again. Dorit says in the moment, it was abrupt and shocking. She says she was laser focused on Kyle, since she was upset because of her. LVP tells her to cut to the chase; she thought they’d moved on. Dorit says she wondered what warranted that kind of departure. She repeated to the others what LVP said about Dorit ignoring her when they’re’ in a group. In her interview, LVP says Dorit’s best quality is that she talks a lot, and her worst quality is that she talks a lot. Important stuff gets lost in the nonsense. LVP asks if she has any other nuggets; now is her chance. In her interview, LVP wonders why Dorit would bring it up again. Dorit says both she and Kyle had strong feelings. LVP says she did too; that’s why she left. Dorit thought she was upset because she wasn’t paying attention to her, since LVP told her about not getting attention as a child. LVP says that wasn’t what she meant. She got plenty of attention, but her parents were British in their lack of being demonstrative. She doesn’t need Dorit’s attention, and it was inappropriate to say. LVP tells her to go make herself beautiful. In her interview, Dorit says a weight has been taken off her shoulders. Dorit hugs LVP, and jumps up and down. I always find adults jumping up and down and clapping a little disconcerting.

Erika, who’s wearing the coolest sunglasses ever, is on her way to her publisher to give them an update. She tells them she’s never felt so unintelligent; she feels like a fish out of water. One of them tells her a lot of people are excited about the book. In her interview, Erika is glad she’s wearing her sunglasses. She kept them on because of her allergies, but they also can’t see the fear in her eyes. She says it’s important to understand when you’re not the smartest person in the room. She needs an ally. Her co-writer says that he just sent a chapter to Erika for tweaking, and Erika says she and her mother have some memories to include. In her interview, she says she’s beating the odds, and there’s no room for mistakes.

Dorit gets glammed up, and says it feels like she’s going to the prom. She’s not just the host this evening; she’s the guest of honor, being on Bella magazine’s fashion issue for Fashion week. She needs fashion oozing out of her. She calls PK, and tells him that she’s nervous. She thinks it’s because he’s not there. PK tells her that it’s her thing, and to relax.

LisaR says she can’t keep track of what’s going on with the girls. They have the same, yet different, schedules. They’d gone shopping, and the delivery guy was robbed on his way to Delilah’s apartment; they took everything. She’s not feeling great about leaving Delilah in the city. She confirms a Dolce & Gabbana appointment for the girls on her iPad. She’s finding her boundary being a momager. It’s their career, but they still need guidance.

The hairdresser tells Teddi not to touch her hair all night; one of the extensions is questionable. Teddi video chats with Edwin.  Erika decides to go with the baby doll hooker look.

LVP joins Kyle, and tells her what Dorit said, but Kyle doesn’t think she was being honest. She’d told everyone things LVP shared with her. They were both pissed, and Dorit told Kyle some things LVP told her in confidence. There were things she shouldn’t have said last night, like LVP being needy. LVP is like, I’m needy? and Kyle tells her Dorit said she was jealous, needy, and insecure. Kyle says it started with Dorit filling in LisaR. Then she told LisaR about the beach house, when she and Erika are fine. Kyle told her that LVP would be hurt by what she’d said, and LVP says she’s been more than kind to Dorit. She doesn’t get where this is coming from. Kyle says she’s not creating a problem, but Dorit said it to the whole table. She can’t not say something.

Kyle is impressed with how everyone looks, and says they all brought their A game. She asks what everybody did all day. Erika tells them about her meeting at Simon and Schuster. She says it was intimidating, but it’s not like she’s going to win the Pulitzer Prize. Dorit asks if there are any words of wisdom, and they all tell her to enjoy it and bask in the moment.

Editor Courtenay greets them, and the ladies take a photo together. Dorit has her photo taken a million times, and does interviews. She says it’s unbelievable, and nothing she expected would ever happen. she feels like last time she got that much attention was when she walked down the aisle with her husband. LisaR and Camille run into a designer they know. Everyone agrees that the magazine photos of Dorit are fabulous.

Kyle tells Erika that the beach house situation was blown out of proportion. Dorit made it seem like she alone was upset. It wasn’t a big deal, and she wasn’t alone in how she felt, but she cares about Erika, and doesn’t like it. Erika says she loves Kyle, and agrees about it being blown up. LisaR says she thought it was ridiculous. Erika is happy to hear her say it, She didn’t understand why it was a big deal, and never wants to talk about it again.

LVP talks to Teddi, saying she was taken aback by Dorit. Teddi says she doesn’t think it was meant to be malicious. In her interview, Teddi says Dorit is all about Dorit, and it’s going to bite her in the ass. That’s just what happens. She tells LVP that Dorit perceived she was upset because she and Kyle were talking. She thinks Dorit likes to embellish while telling a story. LVP says, maybe.

Dorit says it couldn’t have gone any better; she’s on cloud nine. She asks if the ladies want to go for a drink. Kyle can’t put her purse in the rain, and everybody makes a dash for the car. In her interview, Teddi says they’re not witches; they won’t melt. Although that’s debatable. Erika says, sugar melts, m-effer. Camille loves the rain, and says it’s refreshing, which is so like her.

They go to a bar, and Erika tells Teddi that she can see her who-ha. In her interview, Erika says that’s how to handle seeing up someone’s skirt. Tell them you can see up their skirt. Do them a solid. Teddi adjusts things. They toast to Dorit and the magazine. LisaR says she’s not responsible for anything she says. Kyle suggests getting drunk, which is received quite well. She’s there to have fun, but wants to get something off her chest first. Dorit says, so much for the fun night. Kyle says Dorit is great, but if she didn’t care, she wouldn’t say anything. She’s wondering why Dorit singled her out at the beach house, and we flash back to that. Kyle asks why make a bigger deal of it than it was. They’re supposed to be friends, and not only did Dorit make it a big deal, she made it like Kyle did something bad. Dorit says there was a lot of conversation, and she was outspoken. Kyle feels like Dorit put her at the front of it. Erika is like, it’s okay, we’re good, I love you, I don’t want to fight. The next time, she’ll stay. LisaR goes to the bathroom just to get away, and Kyle asks why hurt her or LVP by saying things against them? In her interview, LVP wonders why Kyle is doing this now. It’s Dorit’s night, and she doesn’t want to be in the middle. Kyle wishes LVP would chime in. Dorit wonders where this came from, and who told her?

Can you believe all this for something so stupid?

Erika tells Dorit not to run away with it; she’s fine. Teddi says last night, Dorit relived the story about LVP leaving dinner because she and Kyle had a connection. We flash back to Dorit saying LVP is jealous. Teddi says she implied that LVP is jealous when she connects with somebody else. Erika says Teddi is 100% right. LVP is confused, since Dorit never implied the severity of her statements. Erika reapplies her lipstick, suing the bottom of a glass for a mirror. Dorit tells Teddi to take down her tone, but Teddi says Dorit is yelling over everyone. Dorit says she’s not one of Teddi’s accountability clients, and in her interview, Teddi says she’s not accepting new clients. Kyle is glad at least someone else is defending themselves. LisaR asks Camille what the issue is. It’s complicated, and she barely understands. Kyle says Dorit shouldn’t have said what she did. She’s never screwed Dorit over; why is she feeling screwed over? Dorit doesn’t get it. Erika tells them to stop it. In her interview, Kyle says LVP is just sitting there, making her look like an idiot. LisaR says she’s done. She has to look after her girls, and Camille’s daughter has a show tomorrow. They leave. LisaR thought the plan was to have fun and get a buzz on. What happened? What happened is what always happens. Someone has a legitimate gripe, but decides to bring it up at a totally inappropriate time.

Kyle feels depressed, and Erika doesn’t want her to feel like that. Kyle asks if Erika wouldn’t feel the same way if she was LVP. Would she feel screwed over? Dorit walks past them without a word, and goes up some stairs to the street level. Erika says she doesn’t have all the facts. In her interview, Dorit is hurt by what Kyle did on her night. LVP joins them, and asks if they’d feel screwed over if they were in her place. Teddi says she would, but she’s sensitive. Kyle heads up the stairs, and Erika says this is what she hangs out with gays, and yes, she’d be pissed.

LVP says loves them. Dorit says she’s going back in a cab, and LVP says she’s going with her. In her interview, Kyle can’t believe LVP is offering her a ride. She holds Kyle to a different standard. If she says anything remotely unflattering, LVP punishes her. We flash back to some unsavory moments during reunions. Erika tries to smooth it over. In her interview, LVP says her friendship with Dorit supersedes any things that were said. If she insists going on her own in a taxi, she’ll go with her. Erika asks Dorit to swallow her pride, and do the right thing. She doesn’t have to have a conversation, just get in the car. Kyle is crying, and LVP says she doesn’t want her to cry. Kyle keeps saying to leave her alone. Erika tells Dorit not to say anything to anyone. Kyle wants to be left alone.

Back at the hotel, Dorit wonders why Kyle wants to divide her and LVP. Dorit says that LVP didn’t want her going back alone, and doesn’t understand why Kyle is behaving like this. LVP says she loves Kyle and appreciates her. In her interview, LVP says she just had to endure being attacked and yelled at, and she’s the one who has to reassure Kyle. Kyle says she’s known LVP for ten years. She knows her feelings were hurt, and she’s confused by her behavior. She tells Teddi that she never feels appreciated. Teddi thinks that LVP doesn’t know how to handle someone talking bad about her, and needs to process it . Kyle doesn’t want to do this fake bullsh*t anymore.

Dorit tells Erika that she told LVP what was said when they were in the park. Erika says she’s here for her.

LVP asks if there’s a problem between her and Kyle. Maybe she doesn’t like people talking smack about her all night. Kyle says it wasn’t her. If she’d done that, it would have been a huge deal. LVP refuses to admit Dorit is wrong, and was kissing Dorit’s ass. Teddi says it’s more like she was blasé. Kyle says she was basically screwed over. LVP tells Kyle that she loves her. Teddi say Kyle needs to feel the love. LVP  says they’ll talk about this for the next two weeks, but she’s leaving. Teddi follows her to the elevator, saying Kyle needs her friendship. She begs LVP to come back, but the elevator doors close.

Teddi insists LVP cares, and Kyle says, it is what it is.

Next time, Fashion Week, Kyle won’t be stepped on, Bethenny makes an appearance, and Teddi thinks LVP should apologize.