What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Michael and Willow bring Wiley to the MetroCourt, and Carly hugs him, asking, what he’s doing here? Michael snaps a picture.

Austin puts his hospital ID badge back on, and someone slides a potted plant toward him. He says, somebody else is glad he’s back in rotation, and turns to see Gladys. He says, hello, Gladys, and she says, he remembered her name. She certainly didn’t forget him. He thanks her, and asks, what’s with the plant? She says, it’s her way of thanking him for lifting her spirits when that awful Joey Novak tried to threaten her and Carly at The Savoy. Joey has none of the charms of his Uncle Vincent. She heard they beat the louse up. How’s he doing? Not that she cares. Austin says, he’ll live, and she says, too bad. If you ask her, he deserved it. He says, well, okay. Remind him never to cross her. She says she knew he was a smart man, unlike some other people who never learn.

Maxie and Brook go into the Quartermaine mansion using the back door, and Maxie asks why Brook wanted to meet at her house. Won’t it arouse suspicion? Brook says, Monica is at GH, Olivia is at work, and Yuri just left with a long list of errands (because you always send the bodyguard to the store). They’re in the clear. Maxie says, okay, bring him in. Brook signals to someone outside, and a man comes in, and looks around. He says, wow. This is what he calls authentic old school luxury. Brook says, tell her again how Maxie knows this guy, and Maxie says she doesn’t actually know him. She’s familiar with his work. He’s done a little acting for Nina for Deception. He holds out his hand, and says, he’s Kip. Does she actually live here? Brook says she has a young baby, so she likes to limit her contact with strangers. She gives him an elbow bump, and he says, suit herself. The work he did for Nina was just for fun. His real love is the stage. He grabs a grape from the bunch on the table, and says they should have seen him in Guys and Dolls. He sang, danced, and was really convincing as a badass bad guy. Maxie says, good. That’s just what they need, someone who can be intimidating. He says, intimidating is so in his wheelhouse. So tell him, this little drama of theirs, who is he going to play? Brook says, her baby daddy.

Britt opens the door, and sees Jason and Drew chained to the wall. Peter follows her in, and says, don’t be shy. She doesn’t want to miss the show. He says Drew looks like he’s back to his old self, and Drew says, you smug bastard. I am going to kill you. Peter says, that’s not going to happen, but Drew will kill someone. Jason asks if Britt is okay, and she says she’s much more concerned about him. Peter says, it’s really too bad Jason chose to marry Carly instead of her. They could have been in-laws, but at least this way, Jason won’t be making his sister a widow. Isn’t that right, Britt?

Carly says, it’s the best surprise to see her grandson, and she loves surprises. It’s nice to see his parents too. Michael says they just took Wiley to the aquarium; he’s into whales now. He says, it looks like Carly is busy, but she says she’s never too busy for her grandson. Michael’s father stepped away to make a phone call, but they were going to her office to have a private conversation, and she thinks that conversation affects Michael. He says, if it affects him, it affects Willow, so does she want to come too? Willow says she thinks he needs to have some private time with his parents. She and Wiley will just wash up before lunch. They’ll be waiting at their table. Carly suggests she and Michael go to her office. His father is waiting there, and she thinks he has some things he wants to explain to them.

Austin tells Gladys, he’s from this tiny little town called Pawtuck, and maybe it’s the small town in him talking, but he doesn’t think what happened between them at The Savoy is anything unusual. Where he’s from, it’s really cool to be nice to people. She got him a plant. Can he repay her with a cup of really mediocre coffee? Gladys says, sure, and Austin says, it’s in the doctor’s lounge. He can go back in there, now that Gladys’s boss doesn’t want anything. She says, that’s Brook Lyn Quartermaine for you; she’s all heart. He didn’t deserve what she did to him. He says, he didn’t. Brook is entitled. She sees all people as a means to an end, and in his case, the end is the Quartermaine stock portfolio. She says, it’s unconscionable, and totally unforgivable. He’s her family, and that’s what matters in Gladys’s book. Don’t worry. Brook is going to learn her lesson the hard way. He asks, what lesson’s that? and she says, you reap what you sow.

Brook asks if Kip understands. He looks tough, and like he’s crazy in love with her. And he leaves the talking to her. He says, she’s got it; one tough guy coming up. He gets up, pauses a moment, and says, I’ll be back, in a Terminator voice. Brook says, what is that? Who said anything about an accent? and he says, come on; it’s a classic. I’ll be back. She says, no, no accent. Maxie says, the clothes need to be changed too; way too generic. Brook says she has that covered. She actually borrowed some things from the Crimson closet. Kip says, that’s the great thing about him. He can rock a tuxedo or a leather jacket. Brook tells him, calm down. He already has the job. Besides, he has an audience of one, and Gladys might talk a big game, but as soon as she’s threatened, she folds like a discount lawn chair. Maxie suggests they get Kip in his new wardrobe, and get this show on the road. Kip says, slow down. He’s a method actor, so what’s his motivation? Maxie says, they already agreed on his payment, but he says he’s not talking money. If he’s Brook’s baby daddy, why is he okay with another man raising his kid? Is he just a player, who can’t be tamed by one woman? Or is he so madly in love with her, that’s he’s just fine being her sidepiece? Brook says, fine, Mr. DiCaprio, what kind of motivation do you require? He moves to kiss her, and she asks what he’s doing.

Two guards come in, and Peter says, silence Mr. Morgan. Britt says, no, but Peter says, get back. He only wants Jason gagged, which seems redundant, since he never talks. Drew asks, then why bother? and Peter says, because he’s a cautious man, and because he can’t stand Jason. This is how it’s going to go. Jason is going to let these men gag him, and he’s not going to resist, because if he does, Peter will take it out on dear Britt. Britt says, wow. She’s really feeling the brotherly affection. A guard puts duct tape over Jason’s mouth, and Peter says, one brother down, and one to go.

Sonny closes the office door, and Michael asks why they have to meet behind closed doors. Carly guesses this has something to do with Sonny’s meeting with Ms. Wu, and Michael says, she was at the wedding, one of the heads of the Five Families Salsa di Pomodoro (isn’t it three now?), but she wasn’t in the limo with Novak and Buscema that exploded. He’s guessing that wasn’t a coincidence. Carly says, it wasn’t, and Sonny says Michael knows how hard he’s worked to keep Michael separated from that part of his life. Sometimes the lines get blurred. Michael says, and this is one of those times, and Sonny says, Ms. Wu called in a favor. This time it’s not business, it’s personal. Carly says, and it involves Michael? Sonny says, it involves all of them.

Willow tells Wiley, he has his coloring book, and while they’re waiting for daddy, they can read all about Beluga whales. Harmony approaches the table, and says, what a nice surprise. Willow says, Harmony was the last person she expected to see there, and Harmony says she had no idea she’d run into them. She had a long, hard day at Spring Ridge, and thought she’d take herself out for a little splurge, but if it makes Willow uncomfortable, she can go somewhere else. Willow says she doesn’t have to go. They live in the same town, and it’s a public place, they’re bound to occasionally bump into one another. Wiley’s engrossed with his picture book, so sit down; they can catch up. Harmony sits down, and says she appreciates the offer, but is Chase with her? She knows how Chase feels about her; he made it clear at the birthday party. Willow says, Chase and her… things didn’t work out. Harmony says she’s sorry. Willow doesn’t owe her any explanation, but whatever happened, she hopes Willow finds her happiness. Willow says she did find it, with Wiley and his father.

Austin brings Gladys over to a bench, saying, it’s his safe and quiet place. Feel free to share; speak freely. She says, Brook screwed him to the wall to score points with daddy darling, right? He says, something like that. What did she do to Gladys? Gladys says, she’s not a gossip, but it’s not what Brook did to her; she can take care of herself. It’s what Brook is doing to a dear, kind, extremely handsome friend of hers. He says, Valentin Cassadine, and she says, who told you? He says, the other day, he mentioned to Brook that Gladys was there at the hospital to visit Valentin. It seemed to really upset her. She says she bets it did. If he’s free, they can go to the MetroCourt, and continue their conversation with some adult beverages. He says, he’d love that, but he has to go back to work. She says she understands. She bets his patients are happy he’s back on staff. Just promise her a raincheck. He says, deal, and she leaves.

Brook says, what the hell was that? and Kip says, good. Use that anger. He thinks they should be a couple who argues really passionately, like in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, but then there’s really hot make up sex. She says, look buddy. They are not doing some bus and truck production of Hello Dolly. He’s being paid to make believe he’s trouble for anyone who crosses her. He does that, he gets his money, and goes home. They don’t need to come up with some storyline about how they made Bailey. He asks, who’s Bailey? and she says, her baby, who he’s the father of. Now does he understand? No funny business. Kip tells Maxie that he had to work with someone like Brook in summer stock once. D-I-V-A. Maxie says, they really need this to work, or does he want to go back to waiting tables? He says, fine, but if they don’t get his best work, it’s not his fault. Brook tells Maxie, let’s pick out a suit for this guy. Outside the room, Brook asks if Maxie thinks this is going to work, and Maxie tells her, you know what they say; bad rehearsal, great show. Break a leg. She jets, and Brook says, if this doesn’t work, she’s definitely going to break something.

Peter says, release Mr. Cain, and Britt says, he’s letting Drew go? Peter says, in a manner of speaking, and she asks what that means. He says, she’ll see, and Drew looks at Jason, but Jason shakes his head. The guards take Drew’s shackles off, and he struggles with the guards. She asks what Peter is going to do to him, and Peter says, watch and learn. He shows Drew The Tower card, and says, you’re active. Drew stands up straight, and Peter says, soldier. Drew says, reporting for duty.

Sonny says, if it weren’t for Ms. Wu stepping up, he would have come home to a grieving family; no wife, no best friend. To say their family owes Ms. Wu is an understatement. Michael agrees, and Carly says, Sonny told them his conversation with her wasn’t about business; it was personal. Sonny says, she wants some consideration for someone in her family, and Carly asks, who? Sonny says, a nephew she’s close with, and Michael asks if it’s someone they know. Sonny tells them, he’s sorry to say, her nephew is Brad Cooper.

Harmony tells Wiley that she knows a little something about baby whales. She and his mom moved around a lot, and lived in a lot of different communities. Once they lived by the ocean, and that’s when she learned baby whales, even when they learn to swim and manage on their own, they stay with their mommies. They swim together, then the baby swims in the mommy’s wake to make it easier and faster. Of course (🍷) people aren’t the same as whales. Willow says, whales have been found to be very high in intelligence, a lot like human beings. She asks Harmony, is something going on? and Harmony says, an inmate got pardoned today at Spring Ridge. She’s so intelligent, but she’s an overthinker and worries a lot. They’d been having regular talks lately. Willow says, Harmony is going to miss their talks, and Harmony says, it sounds so incredibly selfish. How can she be anything but happy for someone getting out of prison? She guesses she’s just a bit lonely, so she decided to take herself out for dinner. It’s nice to see people talking, even if they’re not talking to you. Willow says Harmony doesn’t have to explain herself; it’s nice to see her. Harmony says, it is? and asks if she’s keeping Willow from Michael. Willow says, Michael had a family situation, and Harmony says, Willow is Wiley’s mom. What kind of family situation doesn’t include her?

Austin sees Maxie at the hospital, and asks if she’s okay. She says, she’s fine. She’s just going to the GH milk bank. She’s been donating. She figures if she can’t be with her baby, she might as well help other babies and their moms. He says, awesome, and she’ll still be lactating when she gets Louise back; that’s smart. She says, maybe. Obviously, whoever has Louise is giving her formula. She might not even be interested in breast milk when she gets back. He says, still, it’s a really generous donation. Maxie is courageous and selfless. She says, if he knew her better, he’d know she’d do anything to stay connected to her baby. He thinks they should fix that. He’d like to get to know her better.

At the MetroCourt bar, Gladys says she’ll have a Manhattan with an extra cherry, and she’s starting a tab, courtesy of her boss. Just so he knows, her boss is an excellent tipper. Brook sits next to her, and says she’ll have whatever Gladys is having, and Gladys says, by all means. It will give them a chance to revisit their arrangement. She wants to make some additions to her wish list. Brook says she doesn’t think so. She doesn’t think Pauly would like it. Gladys asks, who’s Pauly? and Kip grabs the credit card, saying, vodka martini, their best top-shelf vodka and three olives, as dirty as possible. Gladys tells him to give back the card. She tells Brook, she doesn’t know why Valentin replaced Yuri, but tell her Doberman to give it back. Kip asks if this is the one Brook told him about, and Gladys says, excuse me? Brook says she told Gladys to quit while she was ahead. Now she’s going to have to deal with Pauly.

Peter tells the guard to let Drew go, and take his sister. He tells another guard to hand over his knife. Britt says, don’t, but Peter says, she’s got it all wrong. He’s not going to do anything. He gives Drew the knife, and tells him to hold it to Jason’s throat, and wait for his orders. Britt struggles, and Peter says, now would be the time for her to adjust her attitude,  unless she wants him to have Drew slash Jason’s throat. Britt says she’s sorry, and Peter asks if there’s anything else she’d like to add. She says, please don’t kill Jason, and Peter says, there, she said nicely; he appreciates it. He tells Drew, soldier, stand back. Now cut his own arm. Britt says, oh my God, no, and Drew slices his arm, and looks at Peter.

Carly asks how Brad is related to Ms. Wu, and Sonny says, he’s her brother’s son. He was given up for adoption. Michael says, and Brad is coming up for parole. Does Ms. Wu think Sonny can use his influence to get him out? Sonny says, he told her that he wouldn’t do anything to help Brad get paroled because it would hurt Michael and Wiley, but they still owe her. Even though he said he wouldn’t do anything to help Brad get paroled, he said he woudn’t fight against it if Brad did get paroled. Michael says he respects Sonny’s position, but he’s going to get notified about the hearing, and plans on speaking against Brad’s release. Sonny says, he made it clear that Michael has every right to speak, but Michael’s not going to pull any strings, or use his influence behind the scenes to block Brad’s parole. Michael says, it’s his influence. Why shouldn’t he use it to keep the man who stole the first year of his son’s life behind bars?

Willow tells Harmony that she doesn’t have to be tied to Michael’s side 24 hours a day. She likes that he’s close to his parents. Harmony says, maybe that’s something they can shoot for in the future, and Willow says she certainly doesn’t want them to be strangers. Harmony says, that’s not a ringing endorsement, but she’ll take it. And she hopes to get to know Wiley better. They already have baby whales in common… She thinks she has something for him, and takes a piece of candy out of her bag, but he says he’s not supposed to take candy from strangers.

Maxie says, maybe it’s better if she and Austin keep a respectful distance, and he says, okay. It’s not the answer he was hoping for, but he totally respects it. Can he ask why? She says, then he’ll always be the mysterious hiker in the woods who just happened to be there when she was having her baby, and she’ll always be what he said. He says, courageous and selfless, and she says, if they could just leave it like that, the way it was when they first met, they won’t disappoint each other. He says he gets it. He understands seeing him is some kind of painful reminder to her of losing Louise. He thinks he’s like a trigger. He’ll say this, there’s a lot of support out there of people who’ve been through what she’s going through. If she’d ever want to sit in a group, he’d be happy to join her. She says she would feel too guilty, and he says, why is that? She says, her daughter is still out there. He says if she shares the pain of her loss… but she says, her daughter’s not lost.

Gladys says she always knew Brook was more cash than class, but now she’s hanging around with a nasty piece of work like this guy? Brook strongly suggests Gladys cut her losses and leave while she still can. Kip says, what’s the rush? Hey blondie. From what he hears, she’s his girl’s gofer. Gladys says, somebody told him told wrong. She’s Brook’s executive assistant. He says, he hears she’s shaking down her boss for some perks. Spa treatment, raise in pay… Brook says, she told Gladys to walk away, and Gladys says, she’s out of there. Kip says, hold on, blondie, and Gladys plops back down in her seat. He says she’s been hearing things she shouldn’t have heard, and demanding things she shouldn’t be demanding. Gladys says she doesn’t know what he thinks he knows… and Kip says, she shouldn’t think. She’s a problem for his girl, and that makes her a problem for him. Gladys says, why? and Kip says, that kid of Brook’s, the one she’s asking so many questions about – he puts his arm around Brook – he’s the baby daddy.

Peter asks if Britt needs another demonstration, and she says, no. He tells Drew, return the knife, and Drew hands it back to the guard. Peter tells Drew to let the guard shackle him to the wall, and he does. Peter says, make sure the cuffs are secure. He shows Drew The Chariot tarot card, and says, stand down. Drew asks what he did, and Peter tells Britt to patch up Drew. Now. Britt takes a look at the cut, and says, it’s not too deep; she’s just going to bandage it. Peter says, Jason looks like he wants to say something, and the guard takes the tape off Jason’s mouth. Peter says, now’s his chance, and Jason says, Peter should walk away. Peter laughs, and says, those are big words coming from a man chained to the wall. He tells Britt, finish up; it’s time to go. He shoves her out, and Jason says he’s going to find Peter. The next time they meet, there’s going to be a different ending. Peter says, we’ll see, won’t we? He leaves, and Drew looks at Jason, who holds up his hands for Drew to stay quiet.

Sonny says, this isn’t about Brad; it’s about his aunt. Her warning saved Michael’s mom and Jason. Michael says he’ll honor Sonny’s agreement with Ms. Wu, and won’t pull any strings behind the scenes to deny Brad parole. Sonny says, there’s another thing to consider. He assured Ms. Wu that if Brad got out, and didn’t go near his family, there won’t be any retribution, or an eye for an eye. Carly says if Sonny already made this promise to Ms. Wu, why are they even having this conversation? and Sonny says, he told Ms. Wu that he spoke for the entire family. He just needs to know they’re in agreement. He asks Michael if they’re in agreement, and Michael says he can’t just answer as Sonny’s son. He has to answer as Wiley’s father. When he found out Nina was lying, and knew Sonny was alive the entire time, he didn’t hesitate to have her arrested. It had the collateral benefit of keeping her away from Wiley. Why should he look at Brad any different? Um… I thought Sonny just explained why he should. Carly says, she agrees with Michael. Nina hurt their entire family. Shouldn’t the same standard apply to Brad? Sonny tells her, he’s not saying forget what Brad did. Ms. Wu promised him that Brad woudn’t go near their family. He has to trust that Brad is going to respect her and answer to her. Michael says he respects that Sonny gave his word, and will honor Sonny’s agreement to Ms. Wu. But if Brad gets paroled, and comes within a city block of Wiley, Brad will have to answer to him, and he promises it will not be pretty. He walks out.

Harmony tells Wiley, that is a very important lesson, and she’s glad his mommy and daddy taught him that. Even more so that he’s smart enough to listen. Willow tells Wiley, that is the rule she and his daddy taught him, but this lady isn’t a stranger; he just doesn’t know her yet. This is Harmony, and Harmony is her mom. Harmony says, that is true, but she wasn’t always a good mommy. He’s a very lucky boy to have such terrific parents that always put him first, the way it’s supposed to be.

Austin asks if Maxie just said Louise isn’t lost, and Maxie says, it was a poor choice of words. She meant, as far as she knows, her daughter is still alive, and those support groups are for parents who had children that died. It seems wrong for her to be there because her situation is different. She knows Louise is out there somewhere in the world, and one day will be back in her arms. He says, she’s so hopeful. He doesn’t think he’s capable of doing that, even if he were in her situation, but when he hears her say it, he believes it will happen. She says, trust her; it will. He says, it’s so weird that she would mention trust; it’s something that’s been on his mind lately. When he was in Pawtuck, there was trust everywhere, and it went both ways. That’s because he’s known everybody since he was in the first grade. Then he comes to Port Charles, and he’s having a really difficult time finding anyone he can trust; her being the exception. His phone makes a signal, and he says he really hopes Louise finds her way home to Maxie soon. She doesn’t know what she’s missing.

Gladys says she doesn’t understand Brook. She could have her choice of men. She could have someone as charming and handsome as Valentin, but she chose this Jersey Shore wannabe to be the father of her child? Kip says, hey, blondie, just because you got opinions, doesn’t mean you have to open up your yap and share them. She’s talking to her boss. It’s best she remember that. Or else. He opens his jacket to show her a gun in his waistband, and she asks if he knows who he’s talking to. Does he know who her cousin is? He says, Sonny Corinthos, the don of dons, first among equals. Is she going to be the one to tell Brook’s Uncle Sonny that she’s blackmailing the apple of his eye? He’ll squash her like a bug. Kip slams his hand down on the bar, and says he hopes she understands his message, for her sake. He tries to kiss Brook, but Brook smushes his face with her hand, faking passion. He says he’ll see her fine self later, and leaves. Gladys reaches for the credit card, but Brook takes it. She tells Gladys to take out her cell phone. She’s got some deleting to do.

Peter brings Britt back to her room, and says, what happened with Drew… he regrets having to take such drastic measures, but he had to make sure she knew how foolish it would be to stand against him. She says, congratulations. He’s become the man their father never thought he could be. He’s just as powerful as Faison was. He says, because he stopped running from his legacy and embraced it. Now it’s her turn. Face it. They can never be like everyone else. They have to take what they want.

Jason asks if Drew hears anything. Drew listens, and says he hears nothing; they’re gone, and have no reason to check on them. Jason asks how his arm is, and Drew says he’s had worse. He did this to himself, cut himself, didn’t he? Jason says, Peter couldn’t resist a demonstration. He told Drew that Peter would make a mistake. Now Jason knows how he controls Drew, and knows how to turn it off.

Gladys says, deleted, and Brook says, what about the other copies? Gladys says, she never made any copies. She just said she did because that’s what they always do in the movies. Brook says, and she knows what happens to blackmailers in movies. Their scheme always blows up in their face. Gladys says, Brook won. She deleted the recording, and Brook got her card back. Poor dear Valentin is never going to know the truth. Isn’t that enough? Does Brook have to rub her nose in it? Brook says, maybe she let Gladys off too easy. Maybe she should call her Uncle Sonny. He’s such a sweetheart, and he really adores her. Gladys says she doesn’t want any trouble with Sonny, and Brook says, fine. She expects to see Gladys at work tomorrow morning. Gladys says she’ll be there at ten. Brook says, make it eight, and leaves. Gladys slides Brook’s drink over next to hers and starts drinking.

Maxie sees Kip at the hospital, and wonders what he’s doing there. How did his big performance go? He says he thinks Brook would agree he was big success. Unfortunately, he went a little too method, and ending up hurting his hand. He moves his wrist around, and his jacket opens. Maxie says, is that a gun? and he tells her, relax. It’s just a prop from Guys and Dolls, but it added to his character. She says, as long as it shut Gladys up, whatever works. She has some money for his medical bills. She takes some cash out and hands it to him, saying, that should cover it. Austin sees them. 

Michael is surprised to see Harmony, but she says she was just leaving, and says goodbye to Willow. Michael sits, and asks if everything is okay. Willow says, actually, yes. Her mother was on her best behavior. What happened with his parents? He says, they’ll talk about it later, but let it suffice to say, Wiley is going to need his parents more than ever.

Sonny says, it’s been a while since he’s seen this side of Michael, and Carly says she’s proud of him. Michael isn’t like her. He doesn’t lash out wildly, and end up hurting himself. He finds an opponent’s weakness and exploits it. He found a way to go after Nina for what she actually did, and she’s sure he’ll do the same to Brad if Brad tries anything. Sonny says he’d just be happier if Michael would focus on his family and making them happy, and she says, obviously Michael feels it’s important to focus on protecting his family. Sonny says, protecting the family is his job, and she says, when he was gone, when they thought he was dead, it changed everything… everyone. And him coming back has brought on even more change. You know that saying, once the genie’s out of the bottle, it’s really hard to put it back in. He says she’s not just talking about Michael now, is she?

Peter tells Britt, everything is finally falling into place for him. Soon he’ll have Maxie back, and they’ll find Louise together. She says, he has to be realistic. There’s no way in hell he’s going to get Maxie to come to Cassadine Island. He asks if she’s already forgotten the demonstration he just showed her. Maxie thinks she knows what she wants, but he has other ways of bringing about her happy ending. Remember that. He leaves, closing the door behind him.

Drew says, tarot cards? and Jason says he saw the first one; The Tower. Peter showed it to Drew, and said, you’re active. Drew says, it’s the same phrase Helena used, and Jason says, then Peter had one of the guards give Drew a knife, and ordered him to put it to Jason’s throat. Drew says he’s sorry, but Jason says, why? He looked Drew in the eye, and he wasn’t there. Peter put him under, and he was gone; no free will. Drew says, exactly. He can’t stop himself, that’s why Jason has to stop him. Jason says, it’s not going to come to that, but Drew says, if it does, he’d rather die at Jason’s hands than carry out another one of Peter’s orders. Are they clear? Jason says, yes, and Drew says, so Jason will do it. Jason says he will, but he’s not going to have to. Drew asks how he can be so sure of that, and Jason says, Britt saw the second card, the one that brings Drew out. And they both heard the code phrase – stand down. Drew says, it’s that simple? and Jason says, it’s that simple. Drew says, so they get him. Peter August is going down

Tomorrow, a surprise party, Portia says the show will go on, Maxie asks if Sam is more than friends with Dante, and Josslyn tells Trina that she’s losing her virginity tonight.

Vanderpump Rules

The guys played basketball at the gym; The Boys versus TomTom. Afterwards, the Toms told James and Brock what was going on with the new bar. Schwartz said they’d made a cocktail presentation, and gotten lost in the conversation, and we flashed back to the get together that went sideways. Sandoval said Lala came after people, but you couldn’t bring up anything personal about her. In Sandoval’s interview, he said he’d gotten weird DMs about Lala and Randall’s relationship. They were never allowed to know anything about Lala beyond a surface level. (This is true; she’s always been cagey.) For her to pass judgment seemed hypocritical. James wondered if he’d see all of them at the See You Next Tuesday soft opening, and Sandoval said he didn’t want it to be awkward. James said, what made it awkward was not talking about it. It created more space between them. Tom said he and Lala would need to have a conversation.  

Charli and Ariana met for coffee, and Charli told Ariana about getting a new place with boyfriend Corey. They’d been living together, but at his place, and it would be different getting one together. Her relationship with food had changed as well, after telling everyone. Ariana said when you put something out there, they share it, and they can all bear some of the weight of it. In Charli’s interview, she said, for seventeen years, she only ate pizza, PB&J, and quesadillas. When she met Corey, he told her they weren’t going to eat the same three things all the time. She told Ariana that she was excited for a new chapter. She had a new relationship with food and people. Ariana said, vulnerability is power, and in her interview, she said, everyone in the group had messed up. Here’s what’s f***ed up about me. Get into it or get out.  

Raquel went to Villa Rosa where LVP was brushing Schnookie. Lisa asked if Raquel felt different after becoming engaged. In Lisa’s interview, she said Raquel had a great starter diamond. Hers was a pinprick. Then she learned housekeeping, cooking, and the Kama Sutra, and the ring she has now followed. We saw a clip of Lisa discussing Raquel’s nose with Paul Nassif, and he said it would cost $35K for him to correct. Since Lisa had thought more like $16K, it’s kind of like going to the emergency vet here. You get great care, but it will cost you at least twice as much. Raquel told Lisa that there was more to the story, and in her interview, she said it had been eating her up, lying about James bumping her nose. Lisa helping her was making her feel extra guilty. She told Lisa that she hadn’t been telling the truth. James had gone in fast and hard for a kiss and hit her nose. Lisa asked if anyone had hit Raquel, but Raquel told Lisa to get that out of her head. In Raquel’s interview, she said she knew it didn’t look great for James. He’d created a reputation for himself. He had a history of blowing up on people. We flashed back to some of the many times James has acted insane, although I don’t think he ever got physically violent with anyone. He just yells insults. Raquel said she didn’t want people to jump to conclusions. His entire family was there. She asked James’s mother if it looked all right, and his mother said it looked like her nose was touching her cheek. James flipped out, and took his anger out on his mom because he felt guilty. In Lisa’s interview, she said it was cause for concern. James’s raging had improved so much with his sobriety, but he wasn’t there yet.

At Katie and Schwartz’s place, Lala told Katie that Sandoval was not only bullying her, but becoming like a troll. Ariana joined them, and said her house was like a light store. We saw Tom messing with an app on his phone, making lights in the house change color. Lala asked Ariana, what was that last night? and Ariana said she’d checked out because everyone was yelling. Lala said Sandoval started yelling, and using the F-word at Lisa; he was attacking women. In Ariana’s interview, she said Sandoval was an equal opportunity yeller. Lala wondered how it was going to be when she and Sandoval saw each other, and Ariana said he’d always be cordial and cool. Lala said she was going to be having a discussion with him. Schwartz brought a vision board to Sandoval’s house, and in his interview, Sandoval said, deep dives are business meetings disguised as a hang sesh. In Schwartz’s interview, he said it was time to let pent-up creative energy flow. Let out their inner child and be curious, and drink mushroom tea. Schwartz told Sandoval that they were mining for nuggets of wisdom and inspiration. There were a lot of deep thoughts, or at least what the Toms thought were deep thoughts, and a lava lamp. Schwartz said that Schwartz & Sandy was making more sense. They determined it was a dive lounge, and decided they had their mission statement.

Brock and Scheana visited Corey and Charli, mostly so Brock could hang their TV in under seven minutes. Scheana was documenting the occasion, and we watched as Brock hung the set in five minutes and thirty-nine seconds. In Charli’s interview, she said, during quarantine, she’d moved next door to Scheana and Brock. They’d spent a lot of time together. Charli said she was having a potluck party for her to try new things, and had invited everyone except Lala. Brock said they all respected each other except for one bad apple, and Scheana said Lala acted like a friend then stabbed you in the back. Charli said it was a big night for her, and wanted people there who were supportive. She didn’t want to be judged. James waited for Lisa with Raquel at Paul’s office. He hoped Lisa didn’t blame him, and Raquel said Lisa had told Paul that the doctor had messed up her nose. James said the timing was annoying, since he had the opening of See You Next Tuesday coming up. In his interview, he said he was there for Raquel’s feelings, but what about his feelings? It wasn’t his fault. When Lisa arrived, James said he appreciated Lisa making the appointment, and she asked how he almost headbutted Raquel when he went in for a kiss? He said he was a man, and Lisa said that never happened with Ken. Was he telling the truth? James insisted it was a complete accident, and Lisa said he had to learn to control his temper. An assistant took pictures of Raquel’s nose; then they had a consultation with Paul. Lisa told Paul, the nose issue wasn’t quite the truth, and Raquel told him what happened. Paul checked her nose out, and put the photos up, using a pointer to help explain what had to be fixed. He said they’d have to take cartilage from under her boob, and in James’s interview, he said, now there were going to be scars down there, and it won’t be perfect up there. If Raquel was thinking anything other than no, they had a problem. Paul said he doubted the bump caused the damage, and hearing that, James rejoiced.

James was back at SUR – See You Next Tuesday, full-fledged – and in Lisa’s interview, she said, it was good to see life coming back to the  restaurant. Lisa sat with Sandoval, Ariana, and Katie, who told her about the Toms’ deep dive. In her interview, Lisa said, taking mushrooms and rolling around on the floor wasn’t exactly what she needed. At least she didn’t think so. Scheana said this was where she danced on the bar many a Tuesday, and we were treated to a flashback of that. Randall and Lala came in, and Randall told Lisa that he was sorry he missed the cocktail tasting. Lisa invited him and Lala to come to Villa Rosa for drinks tomorrow. Lala said she wanted to talk to Sandoval before he built more rage, but if they had an audience, he’d see it as a pissing contest. Charli brought drinks over as a peace offering for Tom and Ariana letting her have the party at their house. I’m not sure why that would be peace offering, and not a thank you. We saw a clip of Charli being concerned about having enough room, and Ariana offering their place. Lala asked to talk to Sandoval in private.

Lala told Sandoval, she didn’t want to say he owed her an apology, but what had she done that he was holding onto? He said she’d established boundaries around her personal life and he respected that, but when she brought up Brock’s past, it seemed like a double standard. No one ever brought up anything about Randall. She said she’d labeled a home wrecking whore, and we flashed back to that. She said she felt like she was judged, and held to a different standard. She asked Sandoval if she didn’t deserve as much forgiveness as everyone else. Sandoval said he understood where she was coming from, and she said they were all going to do better.

Ariana told Sandoval that it would be nice to have people over, and him not put on a show, but he said he liked the lights. In Charli’s interview, she said she woke up excited and ready. Now that she was there, she was freaking out internally, wondering WTF she got herself into. She thanked everyone for coming, and I wondered how small their place was, since it was just the usual suspects, minus Lala. I had that many people for parties in my one-bedroom, back in my apartment days. Scheana contributed her famous enchiladas, and Charli said she’d never tried enchiladas; it was a moment. We flashed back to the many times Scheana had talked about her enchiladas, and Sandoval gave Charli a shot of absinthe. She said, one new thing down.

Lala and Randall went to Villa Rosa, and Lisa asked when they were getting married. Randall guessed it would be next year, and Lala said he wanted a production, while she was fine with the backyard. In her interview, she said she’d told Randall that they didn’t have to get married, but he was, no. Lisa asked about Charli’s party, and Lala said Ariana had asked her if she was coming, and she realized she hadn’t been invited. In Lala’s interview, she said, this was more her speed. It was low key, and it was nice to be around people who could just have a glass of wine. Charli moved on to the mussels, was skeptical about them, decided they were not that bad, and ended with a verdict of, wait, it’s good. In her interview, she said she never thought she’d be trying mussels or sashimi. The next time, she’s going to master champagne and being a fancy bitch. Raquel asked the Toms about the bar, and Schwartz said they had an upcoming meeting, where they had to present a mission statement and a design. Katie asked if Scheana had talked to Lala yet, and Brock said, Lala was disrespectful, but expected them to accept it because it was just the way she was. Lala told Lisa that she felt that she was a better person now, but it made her sad. She’d lost her dad, gotten sober, become a stepmother, and had a baby. She felt like everyone else had earned their place, but she still had to prove herself.

Scheana and Brock called it an early night, going home to baby Summer. Ariana suggested they play a game, and they played some kind of category thing where the loser had to play Truth or Dare. When a question about plastic surgery came up, Raquel started crying, and said it was going to cost $30K. In her interview, she calculated that she’d have to work 150 shifts to pay for it. James said it was stressful for him, since he had to look at it, and I wondered if this dude could get any more shallow. I want to like him, I really do, but he needs intensive therapy. In Ariana’s interview, she said, what the actual f***? He should probably never say that ever again. In James’s interview, he said it was annoying playing a drinking game sober, while everyone was sh*tfaced on absinthe. Raquel wasn’t getting one answer right, and he was getting wound up. He was like one of those wind-up monkeys with a tambourine [sic] (it’s cymbals). James called Raquel and Charli dumb, and Raquel got up, saying, we’re done. I wasn’t sure if she meant with the party or the relationship. Charli followed her to the kitchen, and told her they weren’t dumb. James asked if that was a bit much.

Next time, the Toms can’t sell Greg on their non-mission statement, Lala talks to Scheana, and Raquel is concerned about James being superficial. As she should be.

🍸 The Art(ie) Of Being Kip…

It was a little silly, but I thought Kip was fun. I would have liked to have seen him in Guys and Dolls.

https://general-hospital.fandom.com/wiki/Kip_Morris_(Artie_O%27Daly)

General Hospital Spoilers: Brook Lynn’s New Baby Daddy Kip – Gladys & Chase Flabbergasted

🛶 Sitting Down…

Come on over tomorrow for some soap and the accident looking for a place to happen that is Winter House. Until then, stay safe, stay seizing the day, and stay not looking to the movies for your blackmailing tips. The scheme always blows up in their faces.