What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Turbulence wracks the plane Scotty and Obrecht are on. Obrecht takes something out of her bag, then starts to hyperventilate. Things settle down, and she asks, is it over?

Nina wonders if Sonny is asking her out on a date, and he says they haven’t had a chance to be together, just the two of them. She says, it’s like they’re the only two people in the world, and he says, aren’t they? She says, how about tonight they are? and he says, just her and him. She says she knows they’ve gone through some tough times lately, but maybe now it’s going to be okay. He asks, why wouldn’t it be? and hugs her. She says, so has their first date officially started? and he says, the good thing is, they’re not going to have first date jitters. She says, or wonder if the date’s going to end in a kiss, and he kisses her.

Carly asks Jason how Cyrus can be making moves. She thought he was in a Federal prison in the Midwest. He says, Jordan said Cyrus targeted someone; not them, but it proves he’s still a threat. She wanted him to know, the Feds believe Cyrus made contact with people on the outside who still back him. She says, but he’s not after them? and he says, not as far as Jordan knows. But it is Cyrus. so that can change at any time.

Josslyn goes into Jax’s place with Trina, and calls to him. She says, good; he’s not here. Let’s get started. Trina says, let’s do it, and they take some bags into the kitchen.

Shawn takes it Jordan isn’t wildly enthusiastic about his decision, and she says, forgive her. She thought this conversation was going in a different direction. He started by agreeing with her advice to focus on his present and his future. He says, it’s excellent advice, that he just can’t follow. Especially since he thinks he stirred things up by poking around. Maybe that’s what led to Naomie Dreyfuss’s murder. She says, let the police handle it. She’s on this. He says she knows he’s never been one for hanging in the back or sitting on the bench, and she says, is that it? Or does he just not trust her to find out the truth?

Elizabeth looks at the directions for putting up the tent, when Finn joins her with Violet. He says it looks like she’s having a little trouble, and she says, it’s been a while. Cameron and Jake used to put the tent up. He says, it’s too bad they didn’t come, and Aiden says, they’re too old for camping. Violet says, that’s silly. Daddy and Aunt Elizabeth are old, and they’re here, and so is Uncle Chase. Elizabeth says, excuse me. First of all, she’s not old, and second of all, she’s not prepared. She should have asked Jake how to set this thing up. Isn’t it supposed to be easier? Finn gets the tent up in a hot second, and says, viola. She says, look at that. Her hero. Violet says, good job, daddy.

Anna says, Drew’s plane was a chartered flight, with someone else on board connected to Leethy Unlimited, when it went down over the Gulf of Adan. Sam asks how long the WSB has been sitting on this, and Dante says he thought it was supposed to be a full investigation back in 2019. How come they’re only hearing about Leethy Unlimited now? Anna says, maybe there was more to the crash than they’re being told. There has to be a reason for that. Sam says, maybe the reason is, Drew is still alive.

Scotty says, what is going on? He paid good money for a romantic trip to St. Lucia, not some death watch. Obrecht says she normally doesn’t give way to terror, but this was an exception. She’s holding a locket, and he asks what she’s clutching. She says, just a little keepsake to remind her of her children. Perhaps Nathan was watching over them just now. She looks out the window, and says, they seem to be turning around. Perhaps there’s something wrong with the plane. He wonders where the pilot is, and tries the plane’s phone. He says, no one’s answering.

Anna says, the WSB had full control over the investigation, which means the other person was left out deliberately. Sam says, so this mystery passenger could be connected to the WSB? Anna tells her, she wouldn’t be able to say with any certainty; she has clearance issues. Dante knows she’s been blocked from several cases because the Bureau thinks she was compromised by Peter. Dante says, to that end, is it possible the WSB still doesn’t trust her?  Are they sure they can trust this information is accurate?

Chase joins the campers, and Aiden asks how Finn knew the trick to the tent. Finn says he’s done his fair share of sleeping on the ground, and Aiden says, him? Finn says, yes, him. Should he be insulted here? Elizabeth says, she thinks what Aiden means is Finn is well put together. He’s a doctor, and probably didn’t spend a lot of time camping. Chase says, maybe not lately, but Finn used to camp all the time when he was Violet’s age. Violet asks if he’s sure, and Chase says he’s heard plenty of stories. Their dad used to take Finn camping year round. Aiden says, even in the snow? and Finn says, snow is tricky because you have to find the right place to set up your tent. Packed snow is better than soft snow, so you have to stomp around the campground and make it nice and flat. Then you put your tent on top of it. Violet asks if they can go camping in the winter, but he says, only if the car breaks down. Chase says, come on. Snow camping sounds like an adventure. Finn says, it was. He remembers them being in their sleeping bags, with the wind howling around their tent. He’d imagine they were the sole survivors of an avalanche. Violet asks if he was scared, but he says, no. He knew his dad would protect him. Violet says, like Finn protects her? and he says, always. That’s a promise. They pinky swear.

Carly says, Jordan told Jason that Cyrus already targeted someone? and he says, the Feds were able to intervene, and protect them, and she says she bets it was Laura. She just got Laura’s RSVP to their wedding, and she said she can’t make it; that she’s stuck in DC for weeks at a conference. He says, she doesn’t buy it? and she says, no. Spencer is back in town, and things blew up big time between him and Nikolas. When Spencer broke his leg, Laura dropped her entire life, and went to France. She would be there for her grandson. He wonders why Cyrus is using all the influence he has left to go after Laura, and she says, other than his mother, Laura is the person he wanted approval from and never got. And worse, he feels Laura wronged him the most. He says, if Cyrus is out to settle personal scores, who else is he after?

Scotty asks if Obrecht thinks the pilot had a heart attack, and she says, maybe that’s why the co-pilot is trying to go back to New York. She hands Scotty the locket, and says, she’s a doctor. She’s going to provide medical assistance. She undoes her seatbelt, but he says, no; buckle up. Unless she knows how to fly a plane. She says it pains her to say it, but no, she neglected that aspect of her education. The turbulence starts again, and oxygen masks drop down. She says, maybe the pilot needs assistance, but he puts her back in the chair, and says, buckle up. He asks her if she needs help with the mask, but she says, no. She needs to survive so she can help Nina.

Nina and Sonny kiss, but this time, Sonny pulls back. He says, it’s just that every time they get close, they get interrupted by something or someone. Is Peter out there? Is she sure he’s gone? Nina flashes back to Obrecht instructing her to tell Peter that Valentin and Anna have a lead in St. Lucia. Soon Peter will never bother anyone again. Nina tells Sonny, trust her. They’ve seen the last of Peter. He says they shouldn’t even be thinking about the guy. What he wants her to think about is the man in front of her. She says she is, but she has one question. What did Peter say to make Sonny want to take his head off? He tells her that he asked if Peter knew who he was, and she says, why? Did Peter seem familiar? Sonny says, no. It’s how Peter looked at him the first time Peter saw him. Does she think Peter knows who he is?

Chase asks, who wants to scout for more firewood? The kids volunteer, and Finn asks if Chase is sure he’s up for it. Chase says, the outdoors is doing him good. And if he has any problems, he has a doctor on call. He tells the kids, hut-two-three-four, and they march off. Elizabeth says, Chase is a big kid, and Finn says, he’s having more fun than they are. She says, it looks like he’s making a full recovery, and Finn says, that makes it all worthwhile. They’d better get the bear bag secured so the bears don’t get their food. The bears want to avoid them as much as they want to avoid the bears, but the bears do love their delicious food. He hoists the bag up, and secures it, and Elizabeth says she still can’t get over him being this master camper extraordinaire. He says he’s not, but he used to live and work in some amazing third world countries. He’s done his fair share of roughing it. She says she’d forgotten about that. There’s a lot they don’t know about each other.

Shawn says, Jordan thinks he doesn’t trust her to do her job? Where’d that come from? She says, there are still some things she’s kept from him over the years. When she first came to Port Charles, and was undercover with the DEA, that was something she neglected to tell him, even though he was looking after TJ. He says, that’s ancient history; there’s no point in dwelling on it. She says she still regrets not pushing the investigation into Hayden’s shooting harder, and he says, he pled guilty, but she says she should have seen the unfair sentencing practices. She should have gone to bat for him. He says she can’t save the justice system and the city of Port Charles. She’s just one person. Besides, she doesn’t have to protect him.

Anna says she’s had conversations with higher ups at the Bureau, and her integrity took a hit because she sought to protect Peter. She assured them that was no longer the case, but the only way she’s going to redeem herself is if she takes part in his capture, and takes him down. Dante says, let’s presume Peter caused Drew’s plane crash. Maybe she raised some red flags by requesting the file. If the info is real, maybe she alerted the person who’s trying to cover it up. Anna says, if that’s the case, the request alone would have been enough, and would have been denied. Sam says, unless they gave her what they wanted her to see. Anna says, if the file was truly altered, that’s a major cover-up, which begs the question, why?   

Josslyn tells Trina, the meat is on marinade, and Trina says her dad’s pantry is impressive. Josslyn says her dad’s a foodie, thank goodness. Trina says Josslyn’s dad is going to flip out when he finds out she’s making him dinner. Does he know she can cook? Josslyn says, she didn’t know she could cook until this summer. Isn’t it strange she moves into a dorm with no kitchen, and has the sudden urge to cook up a storm? Trina says, it’s probably some deep psychologically rooted response to leaving home, but it’s still nice she’s doing it. Josslyn says, it’s a reminder that she loves him and will always be there for him, and he could use the pick-me-up. Trina asks if there’s any specific reason, and Josslyn says, he won’t say it, but she knows he’s upset about her mom marrying Jason. Trina says, Cam told her that the dinner with her parents was super tense, and Josslyn says, that’s an understatement. Her mom and dad act like it’s all cool around her, but she can tell things are definitely not cool between them.

Carly tells Jason, Martin checked out of the hotel, just days after he asked her about their yearly rate versus their month-to-month. Jason says, Laura and Martin suddenly leaving town isn’t a coincidence, and Carly hopes they’re okay. He says Jordan told him the Feds derailed whatever Cyrus had planned, and she says she’s relieved for Martin and Laura, but what about them? He says, they have to assume Cyrus is going to make a move against them at some point; he may already be trying. She says, first Jax tries to trick her into incriminating herself, now they’re back to looking over their shoulders because of Cyrus? He says, the whole thing with Jax was painful, but Jax is not a threat. Cyrus could be. She asks what they’re going to do, and he says he’s going to get to the bottom of it.

Sonny tells Nina, he knows it’s a long shot, but the guy was always so creepy around him; like he had leverage he wanted to spring on him. She says, it was obviously Peter’s arrogance. He always thinks he’s the smartest guy in the room. Sonny says, she knows how he told her not having a past makes you pay more attention to the present? There’s something he’s feeling; he’s listening more and watching more. And from the beginning, Peter gave him bad vibes.

Scotty doesn’t know what Obrecht is talking about, and thinks the lack of oxygen is already affecting her brain. He wants her to put the mask on, but she says she’s breathing just fine. He says, she can until she can’t. Please, liebchen? She puts it on, and he says, if this is it, he wants to tell her something. He thinks that he loves her. He sees that she’s passed out, and he says, schnitzel, come back. He puts his own mask on to help her, and passes out. Rut-roh.  

😒 The President interrupts, but The Man can’t keep me down.

Nina says she really trusts Sonny’s intuition. She only wishes she’d listened to him about Elijah in the first place, but she’s learned her lesson. She’s listening now, and Peter, he’s gone. She couldn’t be happier, and just hopes they don’t spend their first date talking about Peter. He takes her hand, and says if he’s learned anything about Lenny’s passing, it’s that there’s no use in worrying about the future. What’s going to happen is going to happen. She says, all they have is right now, and he tells her, what do you say we make the best of it?

Jordan says, of course (🍷) she wants to protect Shawn. It’s part of her job as a cop. He says they both know what he’s talking about, just like they both know he can handle himself. She says, no question, but it’s still her job to find Naomie Dreyfuss’s killer. He says, it’s not a stretch to think that whoever tried to kill Hayden years ago, killed Naomie. If that’s true, he unintentionally freed this person by pleading guilty, and he has no intention of letting that stand. They can investigate the case separately, or do it together, and find the answer that much sooner.

Elizabeth gets everything ready for them to eat, and Finn pulls some twigs out of Violet’s hair. He says it looks like she’s having fun, and she says, camping is the best. They saw a deer. Chase says, they were so close, Violet wanted to touch it, and Finn says, she knows they don’t pet wild animals, right? She nods, and he says, no matter how cute they think they are, but they’re fun to watch. Aiden says, let’s eat, and Chase seconds that.

Dante says, the Cassadines probably top the list of those with ties to Creighton-Clark, and Anna says, Victor and Helena used that place as their own personal prison. Sam says, Drew was kept there, and Anna says, as was Robin. Dante says, so was he. Lulu, Maxie, Nathan… Anna says, and Obrecht, when Victor believed Nathan was his son. She was just about to arrest Victor when Obrecht shot him. Dante says, they barely got out of their alive when he blew the place up with himself in it in… 2014? Sam says, Victor was in charge of the WSB at the time, and Anna says, it was a very dark path for the Bureau under his leadership. There was unsanctioned, illegal, covert activities all the time. Sam says, think about it. Drew was held at Creighton-Clark when Victor was in charge. They messed with his memory, they programmed him to be their assassin, until Drew was able to break that programming. Dante asks what she’s getting at, and she says, maybe the WSB took down Drew’s plane.

Josslyn takes a recipe card out of a file box, and tells Trina, it’s her grandmother’s recipe, so she’s really hoping she can pull this off. First they have to read it; it’s in cursive writing. It’s a stew that Lady Jane used to make every fall. She knows it’s still warm outside, but her dad loves it. Stew shouldn’t be hard, right? She looks at the card, and says, the cook time is three hours. They’ll be starving by then. Trina says they need appetizers, like cheese and crackers, but Josslyn says they have to do better than that. She gets up, saying, she remembers she saw one she liked. She looks on her phone, and says, baked mozzarella with marinara sauce. They’ll need bread for dipping, cheese, and sauce. Trina says she has the perfect sauce; the one she got in Nixon Falls. Remember when she was starving, and while Josslyn was waiting for her dad, she went to get something to eat? This cute lady at the roadhouse gave her some pasta, even though they don’t serve food, and gave her a jar of the sauce because she was raving about it. She froze half, and it’s enough for the appetizer. Josslyn says she doesn’t want Trina going through all this trouble, when they can get sauce from the supermarket. Trina says she doesn’t mind. The sauce is amazing, and just what they need for tonight. Josslyn says, Trina for the win, and they high-five.

Anna says, the WSB is responsible for Drew’s plane crash? She thinks that’s a bit of a reach. Sam says, is it really, though? There’s a big gap in this file, and that normally indicates cover-up. Dante says, if it was a real cover-up, wouldn’t they have wiped Leethy Unlimited and the passenger from the file altogether? and Sam says, maybe it wasn’t a sanctioned cover-up, but it could have been someone from the Bureau. Dante says, maybe they didn’t get all of Victor’s allies when they cleaned house after his death. Anna says, it would have to be someone with enough authority to conceal the identity of this anonymous passenger, but not enough reach to be able to eliminate the records entirely. Someone who could still be working at the Bureau, and was at least there in 2019.

Elizabeth and Finn come back to the campsite, towels around their shoulders, and Elizabeth asks why the water is so cold. It’s had all summer to heat up. He says he’ll get a fire going. Chase comes back with the kids, and asks if they’re okay. Elizabeth says, never better, and Aiden says she was so funny. She was so worried about Violet falling in, she fell in instead. Violet says, daddy tried to help her, and fell in too. Aiden says, it was so funny, and Finn says, it was so funny, and their concern is so touching. He thanks Chase for scooping up Violet, and Chase says, he’s too polite to gloat, but he finds it interesting that the guy just relearning to walk is steadier on the rocks than either of them. Elizabeth and Finn both say, but he’s not gloating, and Chase suggests they get out of their wet clothes, and he’ll get the fire started. Aiden reminds them about watching the meteor shower, but Elizabeth tells them to go on without her. Chase says he’ll take the kids, and they can get warm. Finn says, sounds like a plan, and Chase leaves with the kids.

Sonny asks if Nina has given any thought to where they’re going tonight, and she says she thought she’d leave that in his more than capable hands. He says he has some ideas of how to make tonight special, and she says, what is it? He says, it’s a surprise. He has to get ready, and it’s going to take some time, so why doesn’t she go put something fancy on and come back? She asks how much time he’s talking about, and he says she doesn’t need a lot of time to get beautiful. So go change and come back. And can she park out back? She asks, why? and he says, humor him. She says he’s lucky he’s cute, and he says, see you soon, and she leaves.

Jason tells Carly that Brick is checking with Sonny’s contacts to see if anyone is dealing with Cyrus, or heard any rumors about him coming after them. She says she just got off the phone with Devon, and Josslyn’s fine; she’s at Jax’s house. He says he talked to Tony about more security at the wedding, and she says, where all of their loved ones are going to be… in one place.

Two guys come out of the cockpit, and check Obrecht and Scotty’s pulses. One nods to the other, and the second guy gets on the phone, and says, it is done, in a foreign language.

Anna asks if she can play devil’s advocate, and Dante says, please do. She says, Leethy Unlimited is a multi-national company with varied interests, and employees all around the globe. What if this anonymous passenger was just a legitimate coincidence? Dante says, they do have an office in Addis Ababa. So what she’s saying is, that anonymous passenger was just a Leethy Unlimited executive, who just happened to grab a seat on that charter flight that Peter was sabotaging and just got caught up in it? He guesses it’s possible. Sam says, then why conceal the person’s identity?

Jason says, Brick is a security genius. Between him and the rest of their people, the wedding is going to be safe. She says she trusts him, but it’s unsettling that Cyrus still has allies on the outside. His organization is shattered and in pieces. Where is he finding these people to carry out his revenge? Jason says, it’s right in front of their faces. Cyrus must have aligned himself with one of the Five Familiespasta e piselli.

Shawn meets Jordan at the docks with food bags, and says he’s come bearing refreshments; two lemonades and donuts from Kelly’s. She says he thinks of everything, and he asks if she’s given any thought to his suggestion. She says he’s right. They can get a lot farther if they work on this together. He says, for real? The donuts must have sweetened the deal. She says, they didn’t hurt. Let’s do this. It would be a waste of time for Shawn to track down public information that she can get much quicker. They can work on this together, but only when she’s off-duty. He says, off-duty? and she says, it’s her final offer; take it or leave it. He says he’ll take it. He hands her the donuts, and says, what he knows so far is, Naomie was murdered, and whoever killed her tried to make it look like a suicide or an accidental OD. What doesn’t he know? She says, it just so happens, she got new information on Naomie’s case just this morning.

Finn asks if Elizabeth is okay. He can hear her teeth chattering. She says she can’t get warm. It feels like it’s freezing outside, but she’s really just freezing inside. You know where this is going, right? She suggests they talk about something warm. Maybe the power of suggestion will help. He thinks he has a place. One of his favorite memories. He was in Namibia for a year, just south of the Sahara; it’s one of the driest, most remote places on earth. It’s desert as far as the eye can see, but not just any desert. It’s vibrant, it’s warm, red-colored swirls of sand, culminating in the most beautiful sand dunes you’ve ever seen. Cascading waves of sand in the burning sun, against a blue sky that seems to stretch forever and ever. An endless horizon. In the late afternoon, all the colors soften to pinks and purples, and a warm breeze engulfs your skin. Does she feel warm or not? She’s still shivering. Elizabeth says, it sounds beautiful. He was lucky to experience that. She’s still chilled to her bones. He says, come here. They can share body heat. She sits next to him, and they look at each other without looking at each other.

On the plane, the guy on the phone says, yes, we have her… She’s fine, sedated… Yes, we’ll take care of Baldwin.

Finn says, Elizabeth is still cold, isn’t she? and she tells him to share his blankie with her. He does, and puts his arm around her. He says, better? and she says, much better.

Trina comes back to Jax’s house, and Josslyn says, stew’s in the oven. Trina says she thought stew cooked on top of the stove, but Josslyn says, not this recipe, which is why it takes so long. Fair warning, the kitchen’s a mess. Trina says she’ll help Josslyn clean it up, and takes the sauce out of her tote bag. She says, now behold everything she needs for her recipe, including a to-die-for sauce. Josslyn says she’s most appreciative, especially since Trina is donating this miraculous sauce to her dinner. Trina says, save her a bite or two so she can have one last dip, and Josslyn asks if it’s really that good. Trina says, trust her. It will change your life.

Carly tells Jason, Vincent Novak was there earlier, and made a point of telling her that he was sending Joey out of the country, and there would be no more trouble from his family. Jason flashes back to Buscema telling him that Joey’s behavior was unacceptable, and that he intended to make his feelings known to Novak. Jason tells Carly, yesterday, Buscema made a point of condemning Joey’s actions, and she asks if he thinks it’s just a smokescreen for the Novaks. He says, and so, what? Joey wasn’t in charge of his actions; he was working off of Vincent? She says, the Novaks are going to try and make a run for their territory, and he says it wouldn’t be the first time the Novaks challenged them. Right now, they can’t rule out anything or anyone.

Someone in an orange jumpsuit is led to the visiting area. It’s Cyrus. The guard uncuffs him. He smiles, sits, and picks up the phone. Someone sits on the other side. Cyrus says, hope you had a nice flight. On the other side of the glass, Mr. Buscema nods, and Cyrus asks what Buscema has for him.

Jordan tells Shawn, they tracked Naomie’s movements up until her death. She wasn’t lying when she told Finn that she’d just come back to the U.S. Passport control confirmed Naomie flew in from Paris the day before she came to Port Charles. Shawn says, that’s like saying LaGuardia or JFK. She could have been coming from anywhere. She says that’s why she requested Naomie’s ticket info; where it originated, the flight manifest. Maybe knowing where Naomie came from can help them figure out why she ended up dead.

Anna puts the papers back in the file, and says, so this other passenger was a person of significance, and that’s why their identity was omitted. Dante says, all they have to do is find out who the other passenger was, and Anna says and if there’s any connection to Victor’s tenure at the WSB. Sam says, no. Maybe it’s simpler than that. Maybe this other person had a connection to Drew.

Nina comes back to the Tan-O, and calls to Mike/Sonny. He comes out, and tells her that she looks beautiful. She says he doesn’t look so bad himself. He asks if she’s ready to go, and she says she can hardly wait to find out where he’s taking her. He says, let’s go check it out, and takes her hand. He brings her outside, where he’s set up a candlelight dinner. He says he couldn’t think of a better place to take her than where they first met. She says, it’s perfect, and he leads her to her chair. She thanks him and sits, and he sits opposite her. He says, a toast. To their first date. She says, to their first date, and they clink glasses, gazing into each other’s eyes.

On the plane, the first guy asks, what did the boss say to do with this one? indicating Scotty. The other guy says, chuck him, and first guy takes off Scotty’s oxygen mask and seatbelt. He lifts Scotty out of the chair, and drags him toward the front of the plane. Obrecht is still unconscious.

Tomorrow, Cyrus asks if Buscema is in or out, Britt can’t help but wonder what Jason and Carly are trying to prove, and Nina says she can’t do this.

The Real Housewives of New York City

As the women were wrapping up the Pin the Lips on Harry game, Ramona’s phone rang, and it was Harry, which freaked everyone out. Since LuAnn is so tall, she easily kept the phone from a jumping Ramona, and answered, trying to fake Harry out. In Leah’s interview, she said Harry was a 60 year old f***boy. Sonja got on, and said she still loved him, but he was toxic. He said she needed to find a nice guy, and she said he was a nice guy until he cheated. Everyone agreed it was weird and random. In her interview, LuAnn didn’t buy that Harry and Ramona didn’t hook up at all, and in Sonja’s interview, she said Ramona didn’t have time to be friends with a man. They sat down, and Leah wanted to hear everyone’s best and worst sexual experiences. Making a really long story short, Ramona said she’d cheated on a boyfriend, and the other guy had a pencil d*ck. She thought God was punishing her for cheating. In her interview, Eboni said Ramona ran from the room if they talked about body parts. Now they knew the truth. Sonja suddenly jumped up, and grabbed LuAnn for a slow dance, and in her interview, Eboni said who was she to question it? Sonja wouldn’t be specific about her experiences, and just gave vague reminiscences about places and positions. Ramona pulled out a pair of pasties from her bag, and then flashed everyone the ones she was wearing. They were like sparkly snowflakes, and she gave them out to everyone, telling them to put them on. No surprise, Leah came out first, and LuAnn said, if you couldn’t get naked with your girlfriends, who could you get naked with? I dunno. Your significant other? Everyone danced around, topless except for the pasties, and in Ramona’s interview, she said she thought covid changed her. Of course, the two tequila shots didn’t hurt.

In the morning, there were remnants of the party everywhere; glasses, feathers, and God knows what. Leah went to Eboni’s room, and Eboni said she was surprised Ramona encouraged wearing pasties. In Ramona and Sonja’s room, Sonja said she was surprised that Eboni loosened up so much. Leah was excited about the identity switch dinner. She wanted to see what everyone else was doing. They took their fancy van to a restaurant, which made Ramona squeal. LuAnn wanted everyone’s best Valentine’s Day story, but Leah didn’t have one. In her interview, she said she wasn’t exactly a romantic, and she asked the others to tell her what she’s missing. Ramona talked about Mario writing extra stuff on cards, and Leah said Rob sent her an old school telegram once when she was away. LuAnn said she kept special voicemails, and Leah said she did too. (Me too.) Leah got teary, and LuAnn detected melancholy. Leah said Rob had disappointed her, but he’d done a lot of great things. You had to accept who someone was. They were still close, and she didn’t want to start a new life with someone because of it. She’d sacrificed that part of herself. In Leah’s interview, she said she’d chosen to do that. She liked what she had with Kiki and Rob, but got sad when she thought about it. Eboni said Leah would move on when she was ready, and LuAnn said, it would just happen. In LuAnn’s interview, she said it was tough out there, but Leah had her guard up. After lunch, they broke plates to banish evil spirits and bring good luck. The each proclaimed what they wanted out of their lives, and what they wanted to come in.  

Bershan arrived, and in Ramona’s interview, she said, the identity switch was LuAnn’s idea, and she’d assigned them whoever they butted heads with the most. For Ramona, it was Leah, and for LuAnn, it was Eboni. Sonja butted heads with Bershan. In LuAnn’s interview, she said she’d done her homework. She wanted to get Eboni down pat. It was all in fun. You had to be able to laugh at yourself. In Leah’s interview, she said she was trying to understand the human that is Ramona. In their interviews, all of the women talked about how they were going to achieve their switch. Eboni was presenting the Cabaret Countess, of course wearing Jovani, and Ramona said Leah was all about shock value. They got in their costumes, Leah stopping by the kitchen to get red coloring for her IV bag of Pinot Plasma. I thought Bershan was going to bust a gut when she saw Leah as Ramona, but Eboni was louder when saw LuAnn as herself. They all seemed like they were having the best time, which is so much better than them fighting. Leah thought Ramona looked hot as her, and in her interview, Ramona said Leah’s portrayal was amusing. She’d nailed the look, except the dress was more Leah. She had to put a little Leah in Ramona. I agreed with this. It was a sparkly mini that I didn’t see Ramona as wearing. Sonja as Bershan came downstairs last. Bershan pointed out her Sonja by Sonja outfit, under $200 at Century 21, and in Sonja’s interview, she said Bershan had her nailed. As much conflict as they had, Bershan got her. Leah told the bartender, whatever your name is, there’s not enough ice in this, handing him her glass, which is totally something Ramona would do. Eboni as LuAnn said she heard it was Ramona’s birthday, and sang Happy Birthday a la the Countess. In Leah’s interview, she said, being LuAnn was hard. You had to sing, and Eboni was doing a great job. Agreed again.

They sat down for dinner, and LuAnn said they each had a card, and there was a question they had to answer as their alter-ego. Leah’s question was, if the New York Times was writing an article about you, what would you want it to say? I was surprised at how kind Leah was, listing all the positives in Ramona’s life, and how she’d achieved so many goals. Ramona said Leah really got her, and they hugged. In Ramona’s interview, she said it was another side of Leah; a softer side that she didn’t show. She wished Leah would show it more. In Leah’s interview, she said just because she and Ramona had differences, that didn’t mean she couldn’t recognize things about Ramona that were good. She wanted to dig deeper. Eboni’s question was, did she, as LuAnn, consider herself a triple threat? and Eboni said she knew she wasn’t Barbra Streisand, but it was about entertainment value, and bringing people joy. In LuAnn’s interview, she said she and Eboni had come a long way. It was nice to see Eboni impersonate her in a positive, spirited way. Sonja as Bershan was asked, who needed the most help? and to give her two-minute best life coaching. Sonja did a little riff on each of the women, and Bershan said she was right on the money. The question for Ramona as Leah was why she talked about raunchy sex so much, and Ramona as Leah threw hydrangeas at Leah as Ramona. We flashed back to Leah throwing ravioli at Ramona in that restaurant in Newport or wherever. Leah said Ramona was scaring her, and hid under the table. We flashed back to Ramona and Sonja huddled under a table, possibly during the same trip. LuAnn’s question to answer as Eboni, was why she referred to herself as Eboni K. Williams, and who was her alter-ego? LuAnn said she’d worked hard to get where she was, and she was going to use her entire name. Eboni was absolutely screaming, and said LuAnn made her feel excited about her own self. In Eboni’s interview, she said, LuAnn did a helluva job. Leah finally couldn’t be Ramona any longer, and ditched her wig and IV bag. In LuAnn’s interview, she said they had all kinds of parties, but the identity swap was the bomb. Agreed one more time. This was the best episode of this season.  

Since it was the finale (sort of), we saw blurbs about what they’re all up to. LuAnn was going to shake her booty on stage when her cabaret show resumed, and was also working on a non-alcoholic rosé. Ramona aced her real estate test, and had gotten a  waterfront condo in Palm Beach… near Harry. Hmm… Eboni had met her new sisters, but had yet to meet her dad, and was working with a matchmaker to get back in the dating scene. Sonja had rented out her townhouse for two years, and was getting ready to do a Comedy Caberlesque show. Leah was going to be a fulltime Jew in the fall, and Kier was enrolled at a top all-girls school, much to Bunny’s delight.   

Leah raised her glass, and said, even though the pandemic happened, they embodied something the country could take notes from in terms of their listening to each other. Even though they were different people, they figured it out. Not just how to co-exist, but they also found something they loved about each other.

Next time – not the Reunion yet, but a Very Special Episode. Remember those? A spitting contest at Martin’s gym, Sonja instructs on how to remove a dingleberry off your dog’s butt, Ramona toasts herself, and LuAnn gets a tattoo.  

😆 Comedy Tonight…

Apparently, Sonja is killing it.

🎈 Up, Up, and Away…

Tomorrow, more hellish behavior from the women with too much money in Beverly Hills. The two Toms will also be hosting a watch party of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City at 9 pm on Bravo. I saw the Vanderpump Rules one – sort of; I was doing something else at the same time – and it looked mildly amusing. They’re just a wee bit full of themselves though. I guess no one has the heart to tell them a Bravolebrity isn’t a real celebrity. No matter what side of celeb you fall on, stay safe, stay gratified with whatever your accomplishments, and stay not petting wild animals, no matter how cute you think they are. Seriously. Don’t do that.