Tag Archives: Fear the Walking Dead

April 17, 2016 –Oz & the Underworld, Cait & the Dead, the Wives & the Shahs

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

Once Upon A Time

Hook wonders what Red would be doing there, but all they have as a clue is a torn piece of gingham.

Back in the Oz day, Mulan and Red are in the forest. Red finds no trace of her pack’s scent and they’re about to leave when they hear a growl. It’s Toto! Dorothy appears and says that Toto only barks when he sees a witch. Red says it must be that she’s part wolf. She makes him nervous and he takes off. The girls start to follow him, but a wind blows up.

Zelena tells Hades to put his name on the card next time. He says she has a visitor from Oz. He says it’s a werewolf who looks good in red. He wonders why Red would chase her all the way here. Zelena says all the goodwill between her and her sister will be undone if Regina learns the truth. Hades suggests she stay and face them. He says they would be quite a team. She says thanks, but no thanks, her time in the Underworld is over. He says either way, he’s taking care of the wolf.

Belle is upset for not showing Gaston mercy and Gold tells her to stop torturing herself. He says she was only trying to protect their daughter. Belle said if she had saved their baby from Hades, she might feel diffrently. Gold says they will get their baby away from Hades.

Red says she used a tracking spell to find Zelena and now she’s made a mess of things. Snow tells her everything will be cool and the ladies all leave to track Zelena down.

Meanwhile, the guys find Cruella instructing one of her thugs rip out the phone that makes calls between the living and the dead. She says it’s not her idea, but Hades doesn’t want any hope in the Underworld. She tells David she’ll let him make a last call if they make a deal. David says no way, and she tells her henchman to rip out the phone.

The girls find Zelena and ask what she did to Dorothy.

In old Oz, Zelena tells Dorothy it looks like she picked up a few strays, meaning Mulan and Red. She says she was banished into the forest and is being kept from her baby. She asks Dorothy where her silver slippers are and she’s holding Toto hostage until she gets them back.

Regina tells Zelena to tell them what she did. Zelena says even she can’t help now and shows them Dorothy in a mirror. She’s put a sleeping curse on Dorothy and she can’t take it off. Only true love’s kiss can do that.

Zelena tells Regina it’s a simple trade, the slippers for her daughter. Regina says just because Zelena made one bad move — or thirty — doesn’t mean she can’t make a good one now. Zelena gives her the slippers and tells her to keep her pep talks. She says she hopes they wake Dorothy.

Regina gives the slippers to Red. Red asks what good they are if there’s no true love to give her a kiss. She says he only one Dorothy ever loved was her Auntie Em. Emma suggests Em might be in the Underworld.

Back in the Oz forest, Red seems to think Toto is more than a pet. Dorothy says when she got back from Oz, her family tried to get her committed, but her Auntie Em believed her and kept that from happening. Before she died, Auntie Em gave her Toto, so just forget the pesky Wizard of Oz story where Toto came along. Red tells her about discovering she was a wolf and accidentally killing her boyfriend. She says she eventually got control. She came to Oz to look for her pack, but isn’t sure the answer is there anymore. She asks what Dorothy is looking for, but Dorothy says she isn’t sure.

In the Underworld, the ladies find Auntie Em’s grave. Regina says leaving the Underworld isn’t so easy, but Snow thinks maybe they can deliver the kiss using the slippers. David comes back with the guys. There’s a lot of talk about leaving and who is going to do what.

Belle goes to see Zelena. She asks for her help as a mother. She says she knows Hades is in love with Zelena, but Zelena says Hades wold never rip up a contract even for her. She asks why she needs her help when she has the Dark One on her side. Belle says he can’t help and Zelena says she knows she’s not going to get her happy ending with Hades or anyone else. Belle is having morning sickness and Zelena says her pregnancy was sped up by dark magic, so she never had that. Belle is concerned that Hades will do the same to her, so he can get her baby more quickly.

Hook pours over a book of the dead. He tells David that the only information he can find out is that Auntie Em died in Kansas. Hook says David’s name isn’t in the book, so he can go, and that Ruby (Red) is his ticket out.

In the old forest, Dorothy says she’s sorry for calling Red “Wolfie.” Red says she kind of likes it and gives Dorothy the nickname “Kansas.” They hear something above the trees. It’s the flying monkeys! Red asks if Dorothy trusts her. When Dorothy says yes, she turns into a wolf.

Red as the wolf, takes off and the monkeys follow. Mulan shows up, asking what happened. Red turns back to herself and asks if Dorothy is okay. Dorothy says she’s just tired and needs sleep. She thinks it might be the poppies that made her tired.

In the Underworld diner, the ladies find Auntie Em. Red tells her Dorothy is alive and needs her help. She’s about to put a kiss into a jar when she dissolves into liquid. Hades says the soup didn’t agree with her, since he put some water from the River of Lost Souls in it. Emma says he wouldn’t be there if he wasn’t scared they might win the fight. He puts the leftovers from Auntie Em in a jar and says this is what happens when you try to help outsiders.

Mulan asks Red what’s up. She says Dorothy asked her what she’s been looking for and she said she didn’t know. She says she thinks she’s been looking for someone like Dorothy and that she’s never felt like this about anyone. Mulan is like, great, what’s wrong? Red says the way Dorothy looked when Red transformed made her think she was appalled. Mulan says maybe Dorothy just didn’t know what to say and don’t make the same mistake she did by waiting to make her feelings known.

Red goes to Dorothy’s place, but can’t find her.

In the Underworld, Red tells Snow there’s nothing else they can do now and says there’s no one to give Dorothy true loves kiss. Snow says maybe Red can. She says she knows Red and why isn’t she on her way? Red says love is a two way street and Dorothy ditched her back in Oz. Red says she’s scared and Snow says that’s a good thing because love is scary, and what you get back outweighs the risk.

The group gathers in the cemetery. Regina gives Red the shoes and tells David to take her hand. Hook says he’s removed Snow’s name from the headstone, and David tells her they traded David’s name for hers. Hook says the names can’t be erased, but they can be changed. David tells Snow to go to their son and he’ll be back before she knows it. David and Snow kiss. Snow takes Red’s hand. Red clicks her heels three times and they’re gone, poof! in a cloud of white smoke.

Hades shows Zelena a freshly bottled Auntie Em. He says Dorothy has no one and he knows how much Zelena hates her. Zelena says Dorothy is going to be asleep forever and what does he get out of it? He dumps the bottle into the River of Lost Souls and says other than Zelena’s happiness, nothing. He says she’s scared he’s going to disappoint her, but she says that’s a chance she’ll have to take. They toast to Dorothy’s eternal slumber.

Meanwhile in OZ, the Munchins and Toto keep vigil over Dorothy with Mulan. Snow and Red pop in. Red approaches Dorothy and kisses her. A wind comes up and Dorothy awakens. Toto barks with happiness.

Red says Dorothy left without saying anything. Dorothy says she was afraid and didn’t want to lose her to Zelena. Dorothy says Red came back for her and Red says she always will. They kiss.

Henry is done with another chapter of the book, and brings it to David. He says Snow made it back to Storybrooke.

Belle comes to Gold’s shop. She says Hades can take their baby any time he wants. She says they have no time, but she can pause everything, including her pregnancy. She has a sleeping thingie and is going to prick her finger and put herself to sleep. Gold balks and says he won’t be able to wake her because he’s not the man she wants him to be. She says he’s not going to wake her, her father is. He says that when he figures things out, he’ll do whatever it takes to get her back to him

Next time, Hades asks Zelena to make chaos with him, David’s evil twin comes back and holds Emma and Robin hostage.

I Am Cait

Cait comes to Kris’s hotel room. She’s getting ready to leave and Cait asks if she has a minute. Kris says it was interesting meeting everyone. She says she’s had some of her friends her entire life and always wondered why “Bruce” never had friends. Cait says she never felt like she fit in anywhere.

Kris says she’s glad Cait is finding happiness, but a lot of sad stuff is going on at home. She gives a list of all the rich people problems the girls have. Some of it involves illness, but all I can think is at least they can afford medical treatment.

Kris says Cait kind of checks out. She says she’s the greatest when she’s present, but when there’s a disconnect, it’s a nightmare. Cait says she doesn’t want to check out on their time together and Kris says she doesn’t want Cait disconnecting from the kids. She says when Kim brought over some of the clothes Cait was getting rid of, it was a sad moment.

Cait tells Kris about her new driver’s license. It says Caitlyn Marie Jenner and the gender says female. Cait says you can go all the way back to your birth certificate and Cait has done that. Kris asks if this means Bruce never exited and she was never married to him? Interesting.

Cait says going forward from here, she would always want Kris in her life, and apologizes for the difficulty and keeping things private. Kris says she understands how frustrating it must have been. Cait says that although their relationship will be different, it will be important. Cait jokes that maybe they can renew their vows someday. Kris asks if she gets another diamond, and Cait says she’ll want one too. They agree it could get complicated and expensive.

Kris says she understands Caitlyn’s journey much better now. They say good-by.

Candis and Kate meet for breakfast. Candis says she had cocktails with Kris the night before and was led down a dark path, which is why she’s wearing sunglasses at breakfast. Kate asks if Candis would like a family. Kate says to be open to different ways it can happen and that she doesn’t need a man. Candis says she has a lot of things gong on and she’d make a great parent, so why wait?

The girls go to a shellfish boil and pardon one of the crayfish. Cait tells the rest of the girls how the talk went with Kris. She toasts to a happy Thanksgiving, so I guess it must be Thanksgiving. Jenny brings out a zither and does a song for the group.

Jenny says Cait has changed throughout the trip. She’s taken responsibility for her mistakes and made a lot of growth. She hopes it doesn’t end when the trip is over.

Kris sends a gingerbread house to Cait. Jenny is impressed. Jenny is meeting her friend, Marci Bowers, a doctor who does gender confirmation surgery (also called genital reassignment) and is also a trans woman. Jenny says she’s never regretted having the surgery, but Cait says she’s uncomfortable with the topic. Jenny thinks Cait makes excuses and needs to find her truth and the words to express that truth. They discuss the surgery and different people’s feelings about it. Jenny suggests Cait talk to Marci.

Cait and Candis go golfing. Cait asks if Candis had fun on the trip. Candis says yes, and it made her think about family. She says that seeing Cait’s love of family made an impression on her. Cait says Candis should look into adoption.

Cait says the last few months have been enlightening, but gender confirmation surgery still makes her feel uncomfortable. She’s nervous about meeting Marci.

Jenny brings Marci to meet Cait. Marci says all she does is match up the physical with the mental. She says that probably only 20% of transgenders get it done because of the expense. Cait asks about the sexual experience and Marci says most are able to achieve orgasm. Thank you for answering that, because I wondered. She says it’s still the same music, but a different instrument. Jenny asks about those who aren’t sure. Marci says it’s personal and a lot of transgenders choose not to have it and are just as happy. Cait says she’s going to ponder it.

Cait goes with Candis to meet an attorney to discuss adoption. The attorney explains the different types of adoption. She says it’s the hardest to adopt overseas because you have to adhere to the laws of both countries. She suggests either independent or foster adoption. She says it will probably take more effort than it would if she was a 40-year-old heterosexual couple, but it could be done.

Chandi comes for dinner with Cait and Candis. Candis tells her about seeing the lawyer. She says she can handle the idea of not being with someone or being rejected by a guy, but doesn’t think she can handle rejection from office buildings, government and potential mothers. She says she’s been living her life as a trans woman for so long, she never thinks about it, but other people do. Both Chandi and Cait think she should go for it anyway. Chandi says she should go into it with an open mind and not think about the obstacles.

Scott and Cait go to get a Christmas tree. Scott says who better than a Jew to go Christmas tree shopping with?

Cait says one thing she learned on the trip was that she has the ability to check out and we flash back to her sort of ignoring Scott. Cait asks how Scott is doing with the holiday season. He says it’s difficult because he has no parents and he doesn’t know how it’s going with Kourtney, but he doesn’t want people inviting him out of pity.

Scott and Cait pick out a tree. Scott says this is the reason being a Jew is better — a menorah is much lighter. They put the tree in Cait’s place. The smoke alarm is beeping and she’s just been living with the beeping. Scott gets up on a stepladder and checks all of the alarms. Scott says when Cait was Bruce, she was angry and cut off, but now she’s a more open, happy person. It’s even obvious to me, and I only saw a handful of episodes of Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

Kris drops by with Christmas cookies. Candis is there too. Kris says a guy came barreling into her office with a backpack and asked for a hug and a kiss. This is with security guards all over the place. He told her he had to go pay his Uber driver and she called security. She says he’s in jail now, but he’d been looking for her all over the house. Cait says half the time she didn’t even know the names of the people hanging around the house and Kris jokes that those were her children.

They decorate the tree and go through the various family stockings. Candis tells Kris about the adoption thing and how it has to be disclosed that she’s a trans woman and she feels discouraged. Kris says it’s discouraging in general, and gives examples of how it’s tough for many women. Candis says it’s not a trans thing, it’s a human thing, adding that sometimes you have to figure out how to move on and change your expectations. Kris tells her that she’d make a wonderful mother and she should go ahead with the plan

Next time, Cait goes on a ski trip, Cait and Candis kiss, and Jenny and Cait get into the Republican thing again.

Fear the Walking Dead

Some kids are on the beach collecting shells when zombies start to come out of the water. Since the kids are really stupid, they leave their shells by the fence holding back the zombies. Is this some kind of offering?

Madison tells Nick he almost got himself killed in the water. Travis has looked at the log book from the other ship and tells Victor there is no more San Diego. The military burned it down. Victor has seen a large vessel following them and says they have to hide. He shows them a cove on the map.

Travis hunts down Chris, which isn’t hard since they’re on a boat. He says they’ll be safer where they’re going, but Chris isn’t convinced.

It’s nighttime, and Madison sees a light on in a house. They dock at the pier nearby. Victor stays on the boat, while the others go ashore. Everything looks dark in the village, but Travis thinks they’re just scared. He calls out saying they just need information and they’re not sick or a threat. They just need help.

A door opens and one of the kids from the beach comes out. His father calls him back and says he’s just excited to see people. Madison says they saw a light and the father says it was an accident. Travis introduces himself and the father says his name is George. Travis says they just need to get their bearings and they’ll be gone; there’s nothing to fear from them. Well, yeah, the name of the show isn’t Fear the Living. Although maybe it should be.

Travis looks at George’s library and George says he’s welcome to take something. Travis says he doesn’t have time for it now, but George says he has nothing but time. He tells Travis napalm is being used up and doewn the coast. He says that San Diego was burned and the border has been shut to the south. He says the interior is not better than the coast, and basically half the country is gone.

Madison talks to George’s wife, Melissa, and they compare educational degrees. Madison talks about being a teacher. The older son, Seth, comes in and Melissa introduces them.

Back on the boat Ofelia asks Daniel if they’re going to stay. Daniel says they’d have to be invited. Daniel says this isn’t the world she was supposed to know, but she says understanding this world helps her understand him. She says it’s cruel. Ouch!

Harry asks Nick if he wants to see his room. Nick asks Chris if he wants to come. Chris says no thanks and Nick tells him he doesn’t have to, but it’s better to be with people. Nick sees a bunch of action figures with red dots on their foreheads. Nick asks what’s up with that and Harry says that’s what happens now when people are sick.

Victor wonders what’s taking so long, and Daniel says it’s not like they’re in a hurry. Daniel is concerned about being left behind, but Victor says he wouldn’t have taken them in the first place if that’s what he was going to do.

George tells Travis the world couldn’t sustain itself and this is course correction. He says he’s been studying Travis’s culture for a long time and talks about New Zealand. Travis asks if it’s okay if they spend the night.

Travis tells Madison that George thinks this is all part of nature’s plan. Madison says he’s intense and Melissa grilled her about her job. She thinks that the light was shone on purpose, even though George said it was an accident.

Nick and Alicia are on the boat. Nick says the best thing about the apocalypse is no noise pollution. Nick talks about how the kids have seen too much already and how things will never be normal for them. He says something is off here and Alicia says something is off everywhere.

Chris skulks around a lighthouse and sees Seth with a pickax. He asks Seth what he’s doing and Seth tells him chores and he can help if he wants to. They go down to the beach and Seth says they’re doing maintenance. He goes to the fence where the zombies are and whacks one in the head. He asks if Chris wants a turn.

Travis is looking for Chris. Nick tells him if he wants help, just ask. Chris is busy taking his turn at whacking zombies and it’s like he’s been doing this his entire life. Seth says they’ll come back again before dinner. Chris asks if the zombies can climb, and Chris says they’re pretty clumsy and he hasn’t seen evidence of it. Travis comes down to the beach and Seth tells him that Chris is a pro. Chris whacks one more zombie and Travis doesn’t look too happy about it.

Travis tells George he has a problem by the fence line, but George says Seth manages it and they go down once a week to get rid of the bodies. Travis says his son used to take out the garbage and mow the lawn. George tells him this is how they manage now and asks Travis to take a ride with him.

They go to the shore where George is fixing the fence. Travis asks why they stay there. George says he saw the map and knows the truth. Travis asks how he can give up, but George says he’s not, he’s fixing the fence.

Alicia wanders around an old amusement boardwalk. She’s wearing an iPod which is probably a bad idea. She signs a bird watching tour list. In the meantime, Nick scours the house for drugs. He finds something inside of a globe. Harry’s sister, Willa, comes in and asks him to come and draw with her.

Victor tells Daniel he’s hanging over him like the spectre of death. Victor sees that whoever was following them is gone and says they’re sailing with the tide.

Madison helps Melissa pick some peppers (not a pint of pickled ones). Madison says they’ll be leaving soon. She asks Melissa about the light and if it was an accident. Melissa says it was a mistake, but Madison asks if she was signaling them. Melissa says she saw them from the pier and had a strange sense of hope. She thought Willa and Harry might have a chance if they wouldn’t there. Madison says she thought the island was safe. Melissa says they’re just biding their time until it’s over. Madison asks if she wants to come along, but Melissa says she has MS and would end up being a burden, but she wants them to take Harry and Willa.

Madison talks to Travis, who tells her George is just keeping his family safe. Madison says that where they go next might be safer. He doesn’t want to take George’s kids on Melissa’s say-so, and Madison says what about hers? He says he’ll talk to George.

Daniel is looking all over the boat and finds a knapsack, along with a map and gun that are locked away. Victor is on the phone (?) and says it’s all clear and when’s the latest? He repeats sundown and says he’ll be there.

Nick is obviously distressed and Madison asks what’s wrong. Nick tells her and Travis he thinks George is going to “Jonestown” his family and tells him about the pills he found. He says he knows his pharmaceuticals, and they aren’t recreational; they’re poison.

Melissa tells Madison the kids will be down in a minute. She told them they’re going on a boat ride for a few days. George walks in while Melissa is explaining the kids’ different needs. He asks what’s going on and she says she can’t look at them every day, knowing there’s no future. Harry says something is wrong with Willa.

They go upstairs to find the little girl near death. Harry says she took her pill. Good job, George. She’s a zombie now and just bit Melissa. George makes Travis leave. They all run back to the boat with Harry. He asks what happened to Willa and Nick says she got sick.

Victor says children are dead weight and wants Madison to leave Harry. She says he doesn’t get to decide who lives and dies, and he begs to differ. Seth is suddenly on the boat with a gun and wants to bring Harry home. Madison tells him to come with them, but he gets aggressive and takes Harry. He tells Madison she caused this. What? The apocalypse? As they leave, they see zombie Melissa on the pier. Seth tells Harry to keep waving at the boat. (Just look at the flowers, Harry.) Seth shoots Melissa as the boat departs.

Next time, a possible trip to Mexico, lots of zombies and Nick gets into trouble.

The Real Housewives of Potomac

When I tuned in, both Ray and Michael were on stage and there was butt grabbing talk within 10 seconds. Apparently, Gizelle had inferred Michael was gay when he’s really just a flamboyant Australian, and Gizelle acted like the gay thought never even came into her head. Next.

When the men leave, they talk about Gizelle’s dating. Zzzzzz….

Moving on to Katie making out with her boyfriend at Ashley’s party. Gizelle claims she just asked if Katie was “on something” out of concern, and I laugh my head off. The only thing that woman is concerned about is herself. Katie says the only thing she was on was Andrew. Ha-ha!

Katie points out that Gizelle is the common denominator in many argumentative situations. Gizelle threatens to tell everyone what was edited out from some scene. I wonder if Andy is crapping his pants, since it’s probably something they’re going to use in Secrets Revealed. Gizelle says she doesn’t like when people aren’t adults and now would be the time to show how she acted at Charrisse’s house before the crab boil, but it doesn’t happen. We do get to see her talking about drinking some tea that makes her poop though. Gizelle accuses Katie of being drunk and peeing on the couch during some photo shoot. Katie says she wasn’t drunk, but she’s had three kids. Fair enough.

At this point, I’m wondering why I even bothered with the second half of this show.

In wrapping it up, Andy asks if everyone enjoyed the season. Charrisse’s husband isn’t talking to her any more, Karen and Ashley learned a lot about themselves, and Gizelle says the word on the street is that this was the best thing ever on television. She’s obviously the most delusional of the bunch. Karen toasts to moving forward in peace.

And I toast to this excruciating show being over.

Shahs of Sunset

Last we left the Shahs, there was a lot of cake throwing going on at Shervin’s yacht party.

GG wakes up at Shervin’s house, no doubt with a wicked hangover. Yep, she has one, and doesn’t even remember getting back. She asks Shervin if he had fun. He says he wasn’t expecting to feel this way and there was a lot of anger. Shervin tells her she’s not dealing with her anger in a positive way, which is the understatement of the year.

Mike is giving real estate a break and focusing on building a shoe empire. He wants Jessica to see his vision. Since she’s from a priviledged background, and he feels as the breadwinner, he needs to create more wealth. The shoes are pretty dope, but there’s a lot of footwear competition out there.

Asa comes over to Reza’s place. They discuss the party and GG. Reza brings up when GG attacked Asa in Mexico. He says they need rules and consequences. They discuss seeing Mike again. Reza says it was the first time they were able to get together with him and Jessica and have everything be copacetic.

MJ joins them. Reza says that he mentioned to Asa that he’d like her to get ordained so she can officiate at the wedding. He wants the four of them to go to lunch and have the meal turn into an impromptu wedding. MJ is like, no. She says it’s Adam’s wedding too, but Asa thinks he’ll be okay with it and that it’s romantic. MJ says he’ll want it to be an “us” thing and it’s Reza’s solution to standing him up last time. In her individual interview, MJ says they need to heal their wounds from the last time before the next wedding.

MJ brings her mom’s dog, Ziggy, to the pet stylist. Seriously, it says stylist, not groomer. She wants Ziggy done in hot pink and black, “the colors of a cheetah.” Okay…

Asa’s father and brother have been hired for the shipping department of her caftan business. She says the business is exploding and she wants to set up a future for her family. She says the idea of a family business is great, but in reality, it’s not so great. Believe me, I know. I once worked for a family business (not my own) and it was pure hell. It looks like dad wants to take more coffee breaks than do work.

MJ lied to her mother, telling her Tommy was just a friend. They’re going to pick up Ziggy and MJ wants him to go with her and her mother to dinner. OMG — Ziggy! She has pink and black cheetah print on her legs and the rest of her looks normal. MJ says maybe she should have thought this out more. Um, yeah.

Adam and Asa go for a walk. Asa says that he and Reza call her every morning at different times to give her their sides of the story. Adam isn’t sure if he and Reza should make another attempt at marriage. He says there’s been growth in the relationship, but he’s concerned Reza will call it quits again. Asa asks about getting married and Adam says he’s hesitant.

MJ and Tommy take Ziggy to the restaurant where they’re meeting MJ’s mom. Ziggy is wearing a Louis Vuitton harness. MJ’s mom, Vida, joins them and it takes her a minute to realize what’s happened to Ziggy. She’s pretty miffed, but gets over it quickly, which is a mystery to me since she’s the worst. Oh, I see, she just wants to move on to belittling MJ. She tells MJ she hasn’t lost any weight, which is so not true. She says Tommy is a bad influence with MJ’s eating. Tommy says MJ looks great and Vida doesn’t think he should have an opinion. This is when MJ lays it on Vida that they’re dating.

Tommy says Vida is her mother, she’s not going to marry her. Vida says he’s not a good match. She can tell because she has a gift for that. More like she has a gift for being obnoxious. As they leave the restaurant, Vida gripes at MJ about wearing V-necks because they make her boobs look huge. Silly me, I thought that was the point.

Jessica and Mike go to a smoothie place. Twenty-seven bucks for two smoothies? You’ve got to be kidding. Jessica tells Mike they’re terrible with money, which seems ironic since the smoothies were her idea. She says they need to get a house and Mike has some nasty stuff on his credit. Jessica says they have two incomes now, but what’s going to happen when she gets pregnant? She asks about the new business and wonders if it’s worth the investment, but he says he has to take a risk and together they’ll build an empire. Good luck with that.

Reza and Adam arrive at Asa’s for dinner. She has her patio totally decked out and it looks beautiful. MJ and Tommy arrive next. Asa thinks they’re perfect for one another. Wow. It’s a lot of food for five people. They talk about the party and Asa says GG has hit rock bottom. She also thinks GG needs help, but MJ says they should be telling GG this.

GG goes to a club with Shervin and his brother. I think it’s his brother. He’s always around and looks like Shervin. Do I need to mention there’s a lot of drinking happening?

MJ goes in the kitchen with Adam to refresh her drink. MJ tells him he’s with an alpha male and needs to have his voice heard. She thinks Reza needs ot be challenged and agrees with Adam that they should pace themselves. Adam says the thing that bugs him is that when Reza is ready for something, he just expects everyone else to jump on board.

When MJ gets back to the table, Asa brings out a birthday cake for her. Asa asks what her wish is, and MJ says she wants to reach out to GG. Asa says they have to get to the bottom of whatever GG’s problem is.

GG wants to leave. Shervin asks her what’s wrong. She says she’s tired. Well, she’s drunk, but I think a lot of her problem is the arthritis.

Reza and Adam go to a dessert place and I’m wondering why the clerk has two circles tattooed or drawn on his neck. They get some soft serve and talk about how they need more space housewise. Reza thinks they should make a plan of getting a new place and getting married. Adam says he feels like Reza forgets there are two people in the relationship. When Reza asks how he feels about marriage, Adam tells him that he made something that was special to him feel not so special. I dunno. I think if someone left me at the altar, we’d be done.

Adam says he loves Reza and wants to be with him, but he called off the wedding. He says sometimes he has to second guess what’s going on and he doesn’t want that. Reza says today would have been their one year anniversary and what does he need ot do for Adam to trust him. Adam says a start would be to remember he’s an equal and he doesn’t want to discuss the one year thing.

Next time, Mike and Reza have a talk, MJ walks out on lunch with GG, and MJ creates a problem for Reza.

April 10, 2016 — Gaston Arrives, Cait Does NOLA, Potomac Reunion, Fear the Dead & the Shahs Return

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

Once Upon A Time

Belle’s father says they have a visitor, the eldest son of Lord Legume. Belle isn’t interested. Her father tells her not to be judgmental. He adds there have also been skirmishes that would be squelched by a match, but he’s just asking her to meet him. He introduces Gaston.

Gaston says it’s awkward and asks if she hates these things as much as he does. He tells her if she wants, he’ll go home and no hard feelings. Since he’s quite suave and handsome, she says a walk won’t hurt anything.

Gold looks at a Pan flute in his Underworld shop. Belle comes in and says she won’t be separated from her child and she’s decided she wants his help. Belle tells Gold to show her he can be that man, and that they can save their child and separate dark from light. She says if he wants a future with her, he has to do it her way.

Snow, Hook and Emma are in the Underworld graveyard. A cyclone is brewing and passes quickly. Hook says it’s left something behind. Suddenly, Snow disappears. Emma wakes up. It was a dream.

Hook tells her it’s the first time she’s slept since the rescue. They’re on a rooftop and see a signal. They go back to where the others are gathered, trying to get a spell off of the elevator that will take them to Hades. Emma nd Regina join forces with their magic, but nothing happens.

Emma wonders if a name is removed from a gravestone will the person be released from the Underworld. Hook and Snow say they’ll go with her. Regina says she’ll meet them there after talking to her sister. If Hades has a weakness, Zelena might know what it is.

Hades is stalking Zelena. Nothing new. He finds a daisy growing through some concrete and picks it.

Gaston is running the Underworld pet shelter. Hades goes to see him. He tells Gaston both Beauty and the Beast are there, meaning Belle and Gold. He asks if Gaston wold like a shot at revenge. He says he’s found daisies growing all over town because hope has taken root. He says when souls have hope, they move on, and he can’t have that. Hades says they must be punished, starting with Gold.

He gives Gaston some arrows and says it’s time for him to be the hunter. He’ll be hunting for the greatest prey of all — Rumpelstiltskin.

Back in the day, Gaston is impressed with Belle’s hiking abilities. She says she’s heard unflattering tales about him. He says he has a friend who enjoys embarrassing him. He says he’s spent his whole life looking for a woman of her substance.

He hears something and tells her to stay while he investigates, but she follows. He’s kneeling by an old hunting pit that an ogre has fallen into. Awww! It’s kind of cute. She says the ogre looks young. Gaston says they have to bring him back to the castle, but Belle’s afraid they’ll torture the poor thing and asks Gaston to let her handle it. He’s like, why not? and tells her to lead the way.

In the Underworld, Gold and Belle are going through spell books. He says turning darkness to light is a fool’s errand. Belle walks out. Gaston is across the street. He shoots an arrow at Gold, but Gold catches it in mid-air. Belle says there must be some other way to resolve things. Gaston says no, and shoots another arrow, but Belle and Gold disappear to the wharf.

Belle says thanks a lot for letting her know that he killed Gaston. He says Hades sent Gaston because he knows Belle won’t let Gold hurt him. Belle says they’re going to help Gaston to move on, not kill him. She says it weakens Hades when people move on, so that’s how they’re going to defeat him.

Emma, Snow and Hook are in the graveyard. The cyclone comes up again and Emma says her dream wasn’t just a dream. Emma says the cyclone has brought a monster. Snow asks what they do now and Emma says run.

Zelena is at the diner and Regina sits with her. She says Zelena’s daughter is safe. Regina says for once in their lives, maybe they can try acting like sisters, and asks what happened between Zelena and Hades. Zelena says Hades fell in love with her. Regina asks if Zelena loves Hades. She doesn’t answer and Regina asks what his weaknesses are. Zelena says as far as she knows, she’s his only weakness.

Hook wants to face the monster, but Emma says Snow died in her dream.

Belle and Gold go to the shelter. Belle asks Gold to break into Gaston’s locker. She rifles through Gaston’s stuff until she comes upon a book she once gave him. She says she’s Gaston’s unfinished business and that she can get through to him.

Old days Belle shows Gaston a record of every magical item in the kingdom. She says her mother kept it in case of emergencies. She shows him another book called Her Handsome Hero. Gaston thinks it’s a cheap romance, but Belle says no, it’s all the qualities a man should have. Gaston says he’ll read it and almost kisses her. She finds what they’re looking for in the book. They need to hold a mirror up to the ogre to reveal whether he’s innocent or not. Gaston makes her promise that if the ogre means them harm, she’ll let him take the ogre to the palace.

Hades shows up at the shelter. Belle asks what he wants. He says other than her baby? He asks her if she wants to make a deal and she says not interested. Hades says he knows she’s trying to help Gaston move on. He says he’d like the conflict between Gaston and Gold to continue. He says he wants he to let Gaston and Gold have their fight, and if one goes into the River of Lost Souls, she can keep her baby.

Regina joins Hook, Snow and Emma. She asks them why they’re in her vault. Emma says a monster is trying to kill them. Regina asks why they’re not fighting and Emma tells her about the dream. Regina says maybe the dream wasn’t literal and she has to work out some issues. Emma says it’s possible she thinks it’s her fault that everyone is trapped in the Underworld. She’s frightened that she’ll be the cause of someone’s death. Snow says she didn’t force any of them to come and that they need to face the monster together.

Gaston enters Gold’s shop. Gold is sitting at a table with his back to the door and Gaston shoots him, but it’s only a mannequin. Belle comes out and says so he would kill Gold. Gaston says it’s the only thing he cares about any more. Belle shows him the hero book she’d once given him and asks if she’s his unfinished business. Gaston says he’s tried to throw the book out a thousand times but it always comes back. He says it reminds him about how he died and it’s her fault. He says being a hero isn’t about compassion, it’s about having strength. Belle says Hades is the enemy, not Gold. She tells Gaston that Gold is her husband. Gaston says she always did have a soft spot for a monster.

Belle takes her father to the hunting pit. Gaston is knocked out nearby. He comes to and says the ogre escaped. Belle’s father says his soldiers will hunt the ogre down. Gaston asks to lead the hunting party. Belle says she’s coming too. She still wants to use the mirror in case the ogre was just being defensive. Her father tells her to go home.

Gold asks Belle what the deal was. She tells him he has to promise not to hurt Gaston. Gold promises and Belle tells him what Hades’s proposition was. She says she turned him down because she can fix this. He says he wants to be the man she needs, but it’s not going to happen today, and he disappears, poof! in a puff of smoke.

The hunting party goes after the ogre. Belle follows. They stop where the ogre tracks stop. The ogre is up in a tree and Gaston shoots it down. Gaston is about to finish the ogre off when Belle steps in. She sees Gaston in the mirror and his eyes are all red and crazy. She realizes Gaston tortured the ogre while she was gone. He says he was protecting the kingdom. Belle says the ogre isn’t the monster, Gaston is, and he’ll have to shoot her first. The ogre runs off. Gaston says he hopes she made the right decision.

Gold has Gaston suspended in the air on the wharf. Gaston tells him he’ll always be a beast. Belle comes running up and tells Gold to stop. She says she’s always known who Gold really is and that’s why she loves him. She kisses him and steals the dagger, commanding him to let Gaston go. Gaston grabs his bow and arrow to shoot Gold, but Belle turns toward him with the dagger, and he ends up in the Lake of Fire.

Way back when, Belle’s father tells her it’s war and ogres are coming. She says what she did was the right thing. She asks him if it’s occurred to him that their mistreatment of the ogres is what caused the rift in the first place, and not her mercy. He says his army is no match for theirs, but Gaston’s army could give them a chance. He wants Belle to marry Gaston.

Gaston comes in and says the kingdoms will unite (Scumps!), they’ll solve the rift, and they can rule side by side if she’ll be his queen. He holds out his hand and Belle takes it. She says she will.

Back in the Underworld, Belle tells Gold he was right. He tells her he’s sorry and he didn’t want this to happen, but she saved him and their child. Hades pops in and says the baby is still his. He says the deal was only if Gaston or Gold threw the other in the river, but since it was Belle, the deal is over.

A waitress brings Zelena a covered dish. Underneath is a dead daisy and a note from Hades.

Snow and the others hunt the monster through the forest. They find a wolf with a red cloak near it. Snow puts the cloak over the wolf and it turns into Red. She says Emma’s dream was a vision about finding her.

Next week, Zelena gets revenge, Mulan and Red work together, and Hades gets vengeance.

I Am Cait

Back on the bus. The girls are headed for New Orleans and Cait’s sister, Pam, is meeting them.

Kate says most people think that genitals make you a man or a woman, and it’s the first question people are most likely to ask. Chandi says she doesn’t mind discussing it, if it’s appropriate. Candis is like, your privates should be your privates. Cait says she has no idea what the future holds for her, but every person has a different way of being authentic for themselves. They each discuss what choices they made.

New Orleans! Bourbon Street! Jazz! The girls go out to eat and Cait tells them that Kris is coming by. Chandi says she’s surprised that Kris would want to hang around all of them when she’s still learning about Cait. Kate asks if Kris has been good to Cait. Cait says yes, but she doesn’t exactly reach out. Candis thinks it’s impressive that Kris wants to be around the whole gang.

The ladies are strolling around town and go into a bridal boutique. Candis wants to try on dresses. Candis says it’s an affirmation of what she wants. Of course she looks fabulous. Cait tries on something too and they take pictures. Cait says she’s been in three weddings with the most boring clothes ever and at last she’s comfortable.

Next is souvenir shopping. Lots of fans swarm them and take pictures. Ella says she keeps forgetting how famous Cait is and the reaction in public shocks her every time. Cait’s sister shows up in the midst of Cait dealing with the fans.

More food! I don’t know what pastry they’re eating, but it looks phenomenal. The girls talk about marriage, and Pam says when you have a failed one, you learn from your mistakes.

Cait’s hotel room looks like the cyclone from Once Upon A Time hit it. Jenny comes by and Cait sets up the camera. Jenny “interviews” her about seeing Kris. She asks when the last time was that Cait and Kris talked, and we flash back to a conversation where Kris told Cait she left her family “in the dust.” Cait says there’s 23 years of life there and there’s an element that she doesn’t understand. Cait thinks Kris sometimes gets more upset than she did when they were together. Jenny says her feelings would have been hurt had she been in Kris’s position. Jenny asks what has to happen for them to have better communication, but Cait says she doesn’t know.

The producer interviews Kris in the hotel room. Kris says she’s in New Orleans because she’s heard Cait has been somewhat MIA. Cait knocks at the door. Kris asks where the girlfriends are and Cait says they’re all having dinner later and then it’s party time. Kris asks if she’s going to need a nap. Kris says they were all wondering why they hadn’t heard from Cait, and Cait says they’ve been on the road for about a month.

Jenny and Ella goof around, doing a fake spin-off show with Cait’s video camera.

Cait brings Kris to dinner where she meets the girls. Everyone introduces themselves. When Jenny talks about being married as both man and wife, and wife and wife, Kris says Jenny’s wife is a good sport. Kris asks what’s the most annoying thing about Cait, and everyone talks about how Cait expresses her political views. Cait talks about meeting Hilary Clinton. Cait says she enjoys politics and it’s like a football game to her. Kris says that Cait sometimes gets “cranky’ (or would that be “kranky?”) with those whose political views differ from her own.

Kris says Cait is sometimes unwilling to listen to someone else’s view and meet in the middle. Everyone is jumping in and finally Kate says they outnumber Cait and don’t want to be perceived as bullying. Kris says they need that many people. Ha-ha! It does seem like Cait is being ganged up on, but she also doesn’t really seemed bothered by it.

They talk about Cait having stolen and hidden a key to Kris’s closet and Cait says she also had a copy made.

At dinner, Jenny and Candis joke about matching their napkins to their outfits. Jenny says she has an “unsightly white napkin” and requests a change. They talk about Kris’s reaction to Cait’s change from being Bruce. Jenny says her wife took it personally, and Kris says she did too. I can totally understand that, even though it isn’t personal.

Kris asks what they do what their man bits. Cait is appalled, but it’s a legitimate question. I mean, they’re certainly talking about things that are personal to Kris. Kate says it doesn’t matter what a person has, but Kris says it does to her. Chandi says all trans people don’t choose to go full on with gender reassignment surgery.

They talk about at what point Cait revealed herself to be transgender. Kris talks about how Cait told her about taking hormones in the 80s. Kris seems to think Cait told her it was for some other reason, but Cait says she did tell her she was conflicted. Jenny says maybe Kris didn’t want to listen, but maybe Cait didn’t fully explain either. Kris says she kept asking why Cait was unhappy and Cait would say Kris wouldn’t understand. Jenny says she wanted to protect the people that she loved and not cause them harm. She asks Kris if she knew then what she knows now, would they still have been married. Kris doesn’t know, but she says she would have been a good best friend. Jenny asks if she can’t be one now. Candis makes a toast to Caitlyn and Kris, pointing out that Kris is being very open in meeting with all of them.

They stroll around Bourbon Street, going bar hopping. Jenny gets up on stage to dance with Chandi and everyone is astounded, including me. I have to say, Jenny has really loosened up over the course of this trip and turned out to be more fun than I expected. Candis tells Kris how much her being there means to Cait. Kris says Cait is well on her way, and surrounded by good people.

They throw beads from the balcony. Kris tells Cait she heard Cait would like to date a guy. Cait says only if she went through with the final surgery. Cait says really though, she’s not worried about that yet. Kris says life is short and she should get a move on figuring that out.

Lots of fans outside. Someone keeps yelling “Bruce, go straight, “ and I’m confused at first, because I think it’s one of the handlers forgetting about Cait’s name change and telling her where to walk. I’m also the only person in the world who thought Brooke Shields just really liked her Calvins.

Cait feels good about the day. She says there was a little tension and thinks she should have a one-on-one with Kris before she leaves. I hope it goes better than the last one. Cait hopes she doesn’t resort to old, defensive habits, but is afraid if she doesn’t talk to Kris now, she never will. She goes to Kris’s hotel room.

Next week, the talk, Cait tells Kris she changed her birth certificate, Jenny says she’s never regreted surgery, and Candis investigates adoption.

The Real Housewives of Potomac — The Reunion, Part One

I’m cringing already. These women are rude AF on a good day. The outfits and hair are to die for though. Lots of sparkles. Gizelle has just about the biggest earrings I’ve ever seen.

Andy asks how it was, being thrust into the spotlight. Robyn says it’s still surreal, and several people have gotten personally attacked. I can understand why, although Karen says people were attacking her looks, and that’s just wrong. Especially when there’s so much else to attack her for.

Katie has no engagement ring on and says she’s returned it. Karen says she’s not surprised and Charrisse says she thinks Katie was rushing things. Karen says she would have kept and redesigned it, but not only is that just wrong, depending on the state, it might be illegal. It’s a gift in contemplation of a marriage, so if the marriage doesn’t take place, the gift is returned. Your People’s Court lesson for today.

They discuss etiquette. The discussion goes nowhere. Next is Karen’s empty nest and fabulousness, or lack thereof. We flash back to the same. They talk about her husband being the “Black Bill Gates,” which I think Karen has made up herself. They also talk about the non-gala gala that she hosted. There’s a bit of an altercation between her and Katie where Katie’s smoky eye totally wins.

Andy asks Charrisse about events in Potomac and she’s so busy giving her resume that she forgets what the question was.

Commercial break. For the record, Sultan Wok has the best crunchy noodles ever. They’re so crisp. Not like the cheap greasy ones that a lot of take-out places give you.

Is Gizelle wearing clip-ons? Hmm…those earrings are so huge, they might have to be. They talk about Ray and Karen’s marriage and I don’t want to know. It goes to the topic of Karen’s broke-down kitchen, which I actually liked. I thought of it as “retro.” We move to Andrew saying that Karen is basically an old bat, and Katie says it has nothing to do with her. When Andy says Gizelle is the word on the street, Charrisse says it must be a small street. Ha-ha! Good Lord, then it goes to how Andrew is missing part of a finger because of a car accident, which is somehow offensive to Karen.

We go down Memory Lane with Ashley. Andy asks about the restaurant and Ashley says she didn’t realize how difficult it was going to be. Which is what everyone says when they open a restaurant. Someone tweets about Ashley’s mom and her bankruptcy and why doesn’t Ashley help. Ashley says she does help and I thought it was pretty clear that she was supportive of her mother on the show. There might have been legal reasons why her mom didn’t want to be bailed out of the bankruptcy.

Andy asks if Ashley thinks the others are jealous of her. Ashley says absolutely. They talk about Ashley “humping” Robyn when they first met. Ashley says it was just silly stuff and they all need to loosen up. It’s brought up that Gizelle used the term THOT in relation to Ashley. Katie says Gizelle didn’t like Ashley from the jump. They go over Gizelle’s complaints when they stayed at Ashley’s house. Ashley says Gizelle is like Woody Woodpecker just waiting to pick at something. Andy asks if Ashley would invite them again, and she says she’d invite Katie.

We go back to Charrisse’s crab boil, and how she and Karen called Gizelle out on the carpet afterward. There is something seriously weird about Charrisse’s face, and I mean more than normal. It looks like she’s had Botox everywhere but between her eyebrows. They talk about Karen using “the help” as a derogatory word, and she says her first job was at a Burger King/Taco Bell.

Next is Karen’s birthday and how the birthday person must sit in the middle seat. Andy asks if Karen owes Charrisse an apology for creating a ruckus at the crab boil. Karen gives the old “I apologize if it offended you” and Andy calls her on it, saying it’s the classic Real Housewife non-apology apology.

Andy asks what’s up with Robyn and Juan’s relationship. We flash back with a bunch of Robyn stuff. Andy asks if Robyn would be jealous if Juan dated someone else and she says probably. He asks if she thinks they’ll get married again and she says possibly. She says she loves him, but she’s not in love with him, even though he says he’s in love with her. She says she knows it’s there, but they need counseling and more time to know each other again.

Robyn says she turned a blind eye to the infidelity, had enough and knew divorce was the only option. They move on to the friend who ripped them off and Robyn says the guy killed himself later on. Yikes. Andy asks Ashley about being unsympathetic to Robyn’s bankruptcy. Robyn says she was a little gleeful in passing around the information. Ashley says Robyn hadn’t been nice to her, but Gizelle begs to differ. And why that should make anyone happy over financial hardships, I’m not sure. Katie says it wasn’t cool and Ashley agrees, but Katie moves on to Gizelle making fun of her. Katie and Gizelle go back and forth. Katie says Gizelle is like a chihuahua on crack and we stay on this topic way too long.

Andy finally changes direction, bringing up the bi-racial business and, yes, the butt grabbing. Sigh. It’s brought up that Gizelle generalizes too much and even she has to agree. Andy asks about Katie bringing up that Gizelle and Robyn must be bi-racial. She says she’s tired of people telling her she’s not Black enough. Gizelle seems to think Katie isn’t proud of being Black. They make nonsense conversation.Katie calls Robyn and Gizelle Dum and Dummer, and Robyn keeps screeching at her to shut up.

Next week, Andrew and Katie’s engagement is discussed, more butt grabbing discussion, the men join the group, Karen calls Charrisse a snake, and Gizelle still insists Katie is on something. Maybe she is my grandmother.

Fear the Walking Dead

Great. I have to remember everyone’s names again.

Madison stands looking at the ocean. Some small boats are coming toward the shore. There are bombs being shot off somewhere in the distance and zombies coming from another direction.

Travis tells Chris, who is grieving over Liza’s body, to get out of there, but he won’t leave. A zombie attacks Travis, but Madison whacks it in the head. Travis beats another zombie’s head in with a rock. So much for pacifism.

They get into the boats with zombies still trailing them. A zombie gets his head chopped up by a boat propeller. Nice. They all watch as the world they knew goes up in flames. And zombies. Beautiful shot of the skyline.

Everyone gets on Victor’s yacht, where he says they can survive for quite some time. They hear a bunch of yelling and see a small boat crammed with people. Madison tells Victor about it and he says there’s nothing he can do. Travis tells Alicia to go inside and listen to the radio.

Victor says they have to avoid everyone and everything. Madison tells him to stop the boat. Victor says if he does that, it’s going to be to drop folks off, not take them on. Victor guns the boat.

Alicia is hearing horrible broadcasts from other people on the water. Even the Coast Guard station is saying it’s hopeless.

Nick tells Victor he should have stopped. Victor says they already had this conversation in the pen. Nick asks what if San Diego doesn’t work out and Victor says they’ll have to wing it.

Alicia asks Madison how they know San Diego will be safe, but Madison has no answer. Travis tells Madison that Chris is just staring at the body and he doesn’t know what to do. Madison is still stuck on how they should have stopped. Travis says they’re no good if they can’t protect their own family and that’s what they need to focus on.

Alicia finds depressing music on the radio. She hears someone saying their alive and to give a shout out if they are too. They keep asking if someone is there, and Alicia has the mic in her hand, but says nothing. The voice says please say something and she says she’s there.

Chris won’t leave Liza’s corpse. He finally goes on deck and joins Daniel who’s fishing. Daniel tells him sorry about his mother and Chris says sorry about Daniel’s wife. He says neither one of them got to say good-by. Daniel catches an eel. He says not pretty, but the meat is good.

Nick asks Ofelia if she needs help with her bandage, but she says she can manage. He gives her some first aid tips including drinking lots of vodka.

Alicia is talking to the guy on the radio. She asks if it’s safe where they are. He says he thinks so. They’re in a cove, but he doesn’t want to say where. She says she understands. He asks where she was when it happened and Alicia spaces out. She says it was over before she knew it started.She asks if he lost anyone.

Travis asks Daniel how Chris is. Daniel says you don’t talk when you fish. He says one day Chris will understand what Travis did to his mother was mercy.

Madison searches the horizon with binoculars. She goes inside and finds the wheelhouse empty. She finds Victor and tells him someone is playing music out there. He says sounds can be strange on the water. She tells him he can sleep; she won’t throw him overboard. She asks if they’re all clear and he says almost. She says they should get rid of her. I assume she means Liza.

The guy on the radio talks about going to paradise. Alicia asks if they have water and he says a little bit. She says they have some kind of system. He asks if they could make Hawaii.

Madison asks Daniel what comes next. He says if this is the end of the world, it’s already over. She asks if he’s seen Victor sleep and Daniel says he doesn’ seem to need any. Madison says Victor hasn’t lied, so why doesn’t Daniel trust him? Daniel says he was packing his bags before anything happened. Madison says they should watch him and Daniel says he’s already been doing that.

Radio dude says it’s just him, his brother and his sister-in-law. He had a girlfriend, but lost her. Radio dude says his name is Jack.

Liza gets a burial at sea. Travis makes a big speech. He tries to be funny and it goes over like a lead balloon and crickets chirp. Chris ejects Liza into the water and storms off. Travis wants to talk to Chris. Chris is angry at Travis shooting Liza and doesn’t want to hear it. Travis leaves Chris alone and goes back with the others.

Something is happening to Jack. He says they’re taking on water and asks how close Alicia is to Catalina. Alicia tells Travis that someone is in trouble. Victor overhears and asks if Alicia told him anything. She says nothing important. Victor says the rules of the boat are, it’s his boat, and if it wasn’t for him, they’d all still be on land.

Nick tells Victor that Alicia is just trying to help. He says she’s helping people who don’t matter to them. Victor asks Nick if he was afraid of dying when he used. Nick says no, that’s part of being an addict and Victor says that his fearlessness has value in this world.

Chris and Travis have an altercation that gets physical. Madison tries to talk to Chris. She says it’s okay to be angry and tells him that when she was 13, she hit her father, but it didn’t end well. She tells him he needs to eat. She knows it hurts and it doesn’t go away, but what happened, had to. She says if his father hadn’t done it, she would have because she would never let that happen to someone she loved.

Everyone gathers for dinner. It’s just like Below Deck. Almost. I keep wondering what Alicia did tell that guy. Chris comes out, but goes to the deck. He sees smoke on the water and I think of Deep Purple. There’s a splash and Nick runs out and dives into the water after Chris. He grabs Chris. Chris says he just wanted to swim. Chris dives down. Looking for Liza?

Alicia tells Jack they can’t come; it’s too dangerous. He says okay, he gets her, and he’ll see her soon. Yeah, I thought so. Jack is up to no good. Victor sees something coming toward them on the sonar or radar or whatever you call it.

WTF? Chris and Nick. They keep twirling around in the water. Uh-oh. There’s a zombie with them. Would zombies float or sink? How does that work? Nick gets to the surface. The smoke has cleared and there’s an overturned boat in the distance with stuff and bodies on the water surrounding it. Chris gets back in the boat, but Nick is underneath the overturned boat. It looks like there are bullet holes in the hull. Nick takes the yacht log, but gets attacked by a zombie. For whatever reason, the zombie backs off and Nick swims out from under the boat.

Whatever Victor is seeing, the news isn’t good. He tells everyone they’re going to be leaving. Someone is joining them. He says it could be no one or it could be the ones who did that, pointing at the destroyed boat.

Travis brings Nick back in a lifeboat. Madison says whoever did that is coming back.

Next week, the gang battles the zombies on land, and try to start over.

The Shahs of Sunset

I am so glad this show is back! It’s one of my favorites. I love Reza so much!

Reza says when he came back from Thailand, everything was painful, but Adam stuck around. With therapy, they talked and communicated, and made the relationship work. He and Adam are having breakfast. There’s some sex talk and I go ♫ La-la-la! ♫

MJ’s place is a mess. New Dog Tila has joined Julio, and there’s also a boyfriend named Tommy. They met on social media. MJ wants to purge her closet. She wants to create space in her heart and mind for future cohabitation with Tommy. They are going through her shoes, which are plentiful, but I’m no one to talk. Although I don’t think we shop at the same shoe stores.

Mike and Jessica are still married at this point. Mike is having a hard time though, asking permission for every fart he blows. He and Jessica are on a hike that looks pretty daunting. Mike tells Jessica about new guy Shervin renting a yacht for his birthday. He wants to make sure she’s okay with being around the group. He says they’re willing to bury the hatchet. Jessica hopes that GG can get past her craziness, and if that can happen, she’s on board.

GG visits Asa bearing Stella Artois. Asa is starting a line of caftans. They are really beautiful. She says she wants to bring back old Hollywood glamour.

GG was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. She says she’s at a weird place where she can be crying one minute and yelling the next. Asa brings up Shervin’s birthday party. GG says she still has unresolved feelings with Jessica. Asa says they need to forgive each other. A dragonfly comes by and Asa says it’s an omen.

Mike and Jessica meet with the photographer. Mike says his wedding night was the best night of his life. The photographer quotes them $1500 for the album and Mike says some people spend that on their whole wedding. While it was quite the extravagant operation, I think he’s wrong about that and I was surprised that the price of the photography is so low. I had a friend take photos, so my price was nothing, but still. We get a glimpse into the wedding through the video. It would have been nice to see more of that.

Asa and Reza are shopping at Jonathan Adler. Reza is looking for some stuff for his new house. Reza tells Asa that he and Adam are in a much better place and ready to get married. He says he’d like her to do whatever is necessary for her to officiate at the ceremony. He wants to have everyone out for a weekend at the new house and have a surprise ceremony. Asa is thrilled.

New guy Shervin is GG’s cousin Nima’s best friend. Before the yacht party, the three get together and have a toast to Shervin’s birthday. It’s going to be a white party, so they dress accordingly.

Mike tells Jessica he’s all for her voicing her opinion, but he wants to bridge the gap. Jessica says she’s ready to move on, but she’s not going to be fake. She adds that GG is a loose canon and you never know what you’re going to get.

Reza, Asa and MJ go in the same limo and stop a million times along the way. MJ also recreates her dress that she’s discovered is uncomfortable. Reza says he doesn’t have anxiety about seeing Mike and Jessica, but that they are going to be trapped on a boat with alcohol.

Everything seems to be going well. The boat leaves and Shervin isn’t on it. No GG either. I think he’s going to make some kind of entrance. Mike tries to call, but it goes to voicemail. Yep, here comes a helicopter.

The helicopter lands on the deck. GG is also in it. There’s a deck pool! With a mermaid in it! It’s amazing and I cry because my invitation got lost in the email. GG and Mike’s meeting is cautious, but goes well. Mike tells Reza that they need to find time to sit down together on another day. Reza says he’ll be glad to move forward, but he doesn’t want to rehash old stuff..

The drinks are flowing. Shervin asks GG what’s up with Jessica. They haven’t spoken yet and Shervin wants to call her over. He says he has a gift for making amends. Good luck with that. He has Jessica sit down with GG.

Jessica says she’s been wanting to talk to GG, but wasn’t sure when the right time would be. She says she was shocked when GG let fly about Mike trying to sleep with her. She says they’re married now and she doesn’t care, but at the time, she ended up looking like the crazy one. GG starts to talk, but Reza comes by and GG doesn’t want an audience. GG says thanks a lot to Reza.

More drinking! There’s lots of fabulous food, but I don’t know how much is being eaten. Mike suggests GG has a drinking problem, but that’s a bit of the pot calling the Shah black. Shervin is sure that his birthday has brought everyone together in love, peace and harmony, when really they’re just drunk.

Reza makes a toast, saying how they’re all family and his people are together. He’s quite inibriated and throws some of the birthday cake and some lands on Asifa’s dress. More cake gets thrown and Asifa accuses GG of throwing it on her. Asifa goes past GG and smears cake on her. GG gets pissed about Asifa touching her, pushes Asifa and tells her to take a swim. Cake is everywhere and Reza thinks both girls need some help. Ha-ha-ha! He started it!

GG is pretty smashed and gets another drink. Everybody seems concerned about her. She’s also shoving a sub sandwich in her face. Everyone debarks.

Next week, GG stays at Shervin’s, Jessica says she and Mike can’t seem to hold on to a dollar and MJ’s mother hates her boyfriend. No surprise.

October 4, 2015 — King Arthur’s Court & the Dead

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

Once Upon a Time

I’ve always thought it was funny how, in fantasy or horror stories, they’ll believe in one thing, but not another. Like on Dark Shadows, they would be okay with witches, but a vampire is preposterous. Or vampires are totally plausible, but not a werewolf. In tonight’s episode, when King Arthur is thrown into present day Storybrook, he has a magician who’s been imprisoned, but scoffs that a curse could be involved. A magician who once turned him into a fish, so really?

In order to get Merlin released, dark magic will have to be used, so Regina (otherwise known as the Evil Queen) wants to take Emma’s place, even though Emma (otherwise known as The Savior) is supposed to be the one to save the day. Meanwhile, Emma’s counterpart has gone completely darkside and Captain Hook breaks up with her. Yes, I know, it sounds like the writers are on drugs; that’s not my fault. It’s actually easier to follow than it sounds, but you do have to pay attention or you’ll wonder where The Cat in the Hat suddenly came from.

In Storybrook, some weird ass dark fairy comes down from the sky and carries off Regina’s boyfriend, Robin Hood. It turns out it’s in some kind of payment for some magic where a life is required. Hmm…we’ve got seven dwarves, so I’d pick one of them. Who needs Grumpy anyway?

Back at Camelot, Regina gets an awesome necklace from King Arthur to wear at the ball. It’s really nice, but it doesn’t look like it was foraged during the Middle Ages. Not even close. No surprise, it’s really a hidden camera, or cauldron, or whatever it is they use for candid snaps there.

There’s a cutesy part with finding Regina the proper dress and teaching her to dance. I ignore the dialogue, but lust after the clothes.

Apparently it’s okay to bring your iPod to the parallel medieval world. Uh-oh, someone has realized that Regina is not so much savior as evil queen and pulls a sword on her. In the following melee, parallel world Robin Hood gets stabbed. Regina asks Emma to save Robin. As magic always comes with a price, Rumpelstiltskin pops in and tells her that he doesn’t make the rules and Regina will have to pay up. Emma says screw you, I can do it myself and does.

Rumpelstiltskin is another reason I watch this show. Robert Carlyle is a lot of fun to watch in this role. While most people know him from Trainspotting or The Full Monty, my favorite film of his is the lesser known Ravenous, where he plays cannibal Colonel Ives, a soldier during the Civil War. If you can take great acting, smart dialogue, and a bloody mess, put it on your Netflix list or however you view films.

The dark fairy, who is some kind of demon, is really cool. I’m surprised this show has never won an Emmy for special effects, although they’ve been nominated. The demon starts zapping Robin Hood, but the whole group steps in to take the zap, and shows us that we can succeed if we work together. This show is pretty corny, but the corn is tolerable because of the context.

Rumpel gives Dark Emma a huge cornball speech about love and friendship, but says she can fix all that with Excalibur. Of course she can’t take it out of the stone, so they’ll have to kidnap find someone who can.

Fear the Walking Dead

Travis and Madison start packing supplies and are going to find Nick and Griselda. Daniel wants to kill Andrew because they don’t need him anymore, but even I think that’s a bad idea. He seems to be on their side, they outnumber him anyway and if they’re going break into the hospital, or whatever it is, they’ll need him. Andrew makes sense in telling them he’s only been nice to them, even before Daniel skinned his arm. They leave him alive and behind because he’s an expendable character and the car is at capacity anyway.

They drive through the gate at the Army base. The troops in the watchtower tell Daniel to halt or they’ll shoot, but he tells them to save their ammunition. Right behind him is a Times Square on New Year’s Eve level hoard of zombies. This distracts them while they walk right in, although I’m not sure how Daniel avoided getting eaten between the gate and the watchtower.

Nick and the Allstate guy are still in confinement.  There’s a huge commotion outside and Nick shows Allstate that he has the key. It looks like the zombies are getting in, the troops are evacuating and they’re leaving the sick behind. Travis, Madison and Daniel have gone inside to look for Nick and Griselda while Alicia and Chris are left in the parking garage with the car. Do their parents really think this is safe???

Nick walks out with Allstate, leaving everyone behind who’s begging for them to let them out. I expect this from Allstate, who seems like a grifter, but would have thought better of Nick. Some Army guys want the car from Chris and Alicia. Even though she gives them the keys, they act like a-holes and punch Chris out when he protests their a-holeness. More disappointment. Mostly because why does a random group of men always end up being misogynistic and violent on these shows?

There’s a lot of chaos with the zombies and the soldiers and the helicopters. Some guy gets his head chopped off by some helicopter blades. Nice. Also reminiscent of both Dawn of the Dead and Planet Terror. I’m never sure if something is an homage or there are just so many ways you can kill someone.

Part of the zombie hoard is after Nick and Allstate. Travis and company have made it into the quarantine area. The people in confinement tell them that Nick is a bastard who left them there to die, but at least these guys have the decency to break them free. Nick and Allstate are stuck between a locked door and a zombie crowd (karma), with Travis and the rest (here, on Gilligan’s Isle!) on the other side of the door.This is a pretty good scene. Very exciting and intense. Liza comes along and is able to open the door with her keycard at the very last millisecond. After which they’re promptly attacked by zombies in the hospital kitchen. Lots of fun props like meat tenderizers to kill zombies with.

Did Nick just say Allstate’s name was Rand or…it’s Strand, but I think I’ll stick with Allstate. I kind of like it. Dr. Exner is staying behind with the sick, which is pretty noble. Especially since she seemed like a real tool. Allstate suggests they go West where he has some property. They come across a mass funeral pyre, no doubt composed (no pun intended) of whoever died at the infirmary. The soldiers took the SUV, but Chris and Alicia are okay. See? That was a gratuitous nasty moment with those guys. Andrew shows up and shoots Ofelia. WTF? I take back all the nice stuff I said about him. On the bright side, pacifist Travis finally waves his aggression flag and beats the ever-lovin’ crap out of Andrew.

They get a truck and a car somehow and head on down the highway, where they see the occasional straggler zombie. (How come it isn’t zomby anyway?) They get to Allstate’s house that looks more like a compound. Nice spread. Nick tries to be a philosopher and I go to sleep.

Commercial Break. Sometimes I wish I played video games. They’ll show a clip from what I think looks like a really awesome movie, and then I find out it’s a video game. This one was for HALO5. Just what I’d need though. Another electronic device that I’m attached to.

Allstate says they can’t stay and that “the only way to survive a mad world is to embrace the madness.” He has a yacht out back and methinks they will be boarding it. Uh-oh, Liza has a bite. Liza (who is also Travis’s ex and Chris’s mother) asks Madison to shoot her. Just when we think she will, Travis shows up. His optimism is back and he thinks she can just take something for it, but that’s a no. Madison gives Travis the gun and another expendable character bites the dust.

Oh no. Don’t let it end this way. With some poetic song playing loudly in the background as Travis goes through angst on the beach and Madison joins him while the waves crash over their knees. No, no, no, no. It was just getting good.

Only 6 episodes? They saved the best for last, but I’m not sure if it’s enough to save the show and get it another season.

BTW, Frank Dillane, the actor who plays Nick, is the son of Stephen Dillane, Stannis on Game of Thrones.

September 27, 2015 — Fairy Tales, Zombies & Kim, Oh My!

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

Once Upon A Time

This show seems like it’s written by a bunch of ex-Disney employees on cocaine. Or as Mr. Hand would say, “on dope.” And I mean that in a good way. You never know who is going to show up – Cinderella, King Arthur, the Wicked Witch of whatever direction is in vogue. I’m waiting for the Peanuts gang to stop by any second.

I’d watched some of the show before the season premiere, where the cast and writers answered fan’s questions. Apparently, this show has achieved mini cultlike status. I didn’t think I was the only one watching it, because it keeps getting renewed, but I hadn’t realized how attached many people are to it. They continually said that it’s a “story about hope.” I can’t say I read a lot into it myself, although I do have shows and movies I feel that way about, so I’m impressed. My reasons for watching are much more shallow. The fabulous sets and costumes, and Captain Hook. He ain’t Walt Disney’s Captain Hook. It is also a lot of fun, characters from every favorite childhood story, living normal lives in a parallel world, while they wield their magic in whatever world they came from, be it Neverland or an enchanted forest. Bet you never knew Snow White and Prince Charming had a daughter. Frankly, I never thought about it much either, but that was the crux of the story and it blossomed from there.

Note to whoever does blonde hair on television shows – stop giving the women those silver highlights. They look like they have grey hair. Unless that’s the look you’re going for. That being said, I want to know who designed Emma’s coat in tonight’s episode. It is beyond.

Commercial break. Shouldn’t the “Little People Big Animal Zoo” be called the “Little People Big Animal Habitat?” Just sayin’.

This season, they’re adding Camelot to the mix and I’m wondering if Monty Python’s Flying Circus will come along? The special effects are also a lot of fun, and tonight Sneezy got turned into stone and crumbled into dust. He never did get any respect.

And whatever happened to Pongo?

Fear the Walking Dead

I got confused for a second with it starting off with some guy talking about being a closer, saying he can sell anything but insurance, like he’s a leftover from an Allstate commercial. We’re in some kind of holding tank, which I assume is the quarantine area. Nick is also there.

All right! The Walking Dead is coming back October  11 – Daryl & zombies!

Daniel’s daughter, Ofelia, is hopping up and down and creating a scene at the fence. She wants to see her mother. She tries to get others to go along with her complaining, but no one wants to get involved. Andrew, a soldier she befriended earlier, intervenes. Some guy in the background has had enough and is quitting the soldier business.

In the infirmary, Liza has been recruited to help with the sick. Dr. Exner says they’re short staffed and doesn’t explain where some of the staff went. I’ll bet I can guess.

Meanwhile, back at Madison’s place Chris basically tells Travis he’s a pacifist tool and storms off. Madison finds that Daniel has captured Andrew, who I assume he’s going to pump for information. Andrew gives him a bunch of rhetoric, telling them everything is cool. We all know everything is not cool, except for Travis who lives in Dream Valley with the My Little Ponies. He’s gone off to reason with his buddy, Lt. Moyers, and more rhetoric is given. Travis tells him that if the people who were taken don’t come back soon, the town is not going to be happy. This was really a stupid move, since he gets taken to “see the doctor,” which I think is a euphemism for “you’re not coming back.”

Lieutenant Dickweed will be lucky if his own men don’t end up killing him.

Oh look! It’s a zombie! I’d almost forgotten that’s what this show is about. Moyers wants Travis to kill it – I guess to make some kind of point. IMO this is akin to the Mafia guys in movies who always want to recruit civilians to be hit men. Probably not a good idea if you really want to get the job done. Travis can’t do it, so Moyers does, proving that Travis is willing to let someone else do the dirty work.

Commercial break. Into the Badlands looks amazing. It’s some kind of samurai drama. I don’t need another show to watch though. TV has got to stop being so good. Love those beer ads about “the most interesting man in the world.” IRL, he’s an animal activist. I read this in an article titled, The Most Interesting Man in the World Just Got More Interesting.

Back at the infirmary, a soldier has come in with bite marks and everyone gets real busy real quickly. Travis and the soldiers drive through an evacuated area that’s not so evacuated, since it’s crawling with zombies. When the soldiers are done doing whatever, Travis is told they’re taking him a few blocks away from home and he has to walk the rest of the way. What?!  Thanks a lot!

Apparently, Daniel knows a thing or two about torture and is skinning one of Andrew’s arms. Whoa.  Chris and Alicia have broken into a rich person’s house, play with their expensive toys and try on their expensive clothes. (An homage to the original Dawn of the Dead perhaps?) In the quarantine area, the soldiers are taking everyone’s temperature with a device that they can use from a distance. Cool! Nick’s temp is high (probably from withdrawal), but the Allstate guy keeps him from getting hauled away.

Ofelia is not too happy about Daniel’s means of getting information and walks out of the house. Lots of storming off tonight, even though there’s nowhere to storm off to. Daniel explains to Madison that he had told his daughter about the war he’s been through, but not what part he played in it. He says that sometimes it’s necessary to be evil in order to eradicate evil. He didn’t use those exact words, but I paraphrased. Not bad, eh?

Liza is combing the place for Griselda. She finds her among other “patients” in a locked area where all the people are wrapped up in what look like cocoons. Dr. Exner comes up behind her, and tells her that they have “septic shock” and there isn’t anything anyone can do. I’m guessing these are the people closest to death and they’re being kept far away and confined.

Chris and Alicia trash the rich people’s house just like normal teenagers. Travis makes it home and sees Ofelia practically catatonic.  He is totally appalled at Daniel’s behavior, but hey, it worked. Andrew is spilling everything. It turns out the soldiers are all going to book and the civilians are going to be “humanely terminated.”

The Allstate guy is amused that the people who have everything are now being looked at as lunch. He knows what’s happening with the evacuation, and wants Nick’s help. I’m pretty sure that this guy doesn’t do anything without wanting a favor in return.

Griselda is babbling in Spanish about the past which means I have to read subtitles. Afterward, she promptly dies. Why they have un-cocooned her, I have no clue. That seems kind of dangerous, and the doctor has just said they all come back and to shoot her in the head with some kind of gun used for livestock, which Liza does.

Why the blip is Daniel roaming about alone at night? He wanders all the way to the Los Angeles Arena, where the soldiers have chained a whole load of zombies inside. He watches as the doors begin to shake, reminiscent of when Rick finds the chained doors in the first episode of The Walking Dead. The only thing missing is the warning DO NOT OPEN – DEAD INSIDE.

It looks like next week, we will get full on zombies.

Best quote by Lt. D-bag: I can do anything I want. I got guns.

Don’t Be Tardy

This is one of those shows that I can take or leave, but really enjoy it when I take it. Despite her recent airport tantrum (who hasn’t at least thrown one in their head?), Kim and the rest of the Biermanns seem like lovely, normal (albeit rich) people.

Tonight, Kim made a speech and she got my vote for best real quote of the night. Maybe the year. While addressing a group of women, she said, “Can you imagine if [women] truly shared what they know with each other, how successful they would be?” She said this after talking about how some women will resent others doing well. Brava, Kim! I’ve thought that for a long time.

Don’t Be Tardy also got the award of the millennium for being a true glimpse of reality. Their dog took a poop and promptly ate it, causing Troy to convulse in laughter, and the girls to screech at the top of their lungs. It doesn’t get more real than that.

September 20, 2015 — The Dead & the Doctors

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

Fear the Walking Dead

Lou Reed’s Perfect Day starts things off.  I love that song! I miss Lou…I miss the 70s…but I miss the 80s more. I also miss I Am Cait being on Sunday night, and I’m hoping it comes back for another season.

The neighborhood has been turned into an internment camp and everyone is fenced in.  Travis is all, let’s trust the government, but Madison keeps trying to tell him something isn’t right, especially since there’s no electricity or phone service. He comes up with some lame reasoning for every point she makes. Travis looks thinner too, so nobody is getting fed either or maybe Madison is a lousy cook.

Travis’s son, Chris, has also seen what may or may not be some kind of signal coming from the demilitarized zone. Travis doesn’t want to hear about it, but Madison is paying attention. Pretty much a typical couple.

Lt. Moyers (head National Guard guy) is playing golf outside the fence. What is it with golf on these zombie shows? Although I guess if a zombie tries to blow your shot, you can always whack them in the head with the club. It’s not looking good when Travis asks him what’s up. Moyers seems to think the people inside the fence are nothing but a nuisance, and I’m pretty sure he has an itchy trigger finger.

Dubious “health screenings” are being done, and a government doctor (Dr. Exnor) has come to see the barber’s wife (sounds like a Canterbury Tale – The Government Doctor & The Barber’s Wife) and wants to take her in “for surgery.” Daniel the barber is skeptical and says he’ll be going with her. There’s no argument from the doctor, and I’m thinking they’re both going to their deaths. Madison sneaks out, cutting through the fence. I’m kind of surprised she was able to escape so early on, since you’d think the guards haven’t had time to get lackadaisical yet. A military patrol comes by and she hides under a car.

In the demilitarized zone, there are a lot of shrines and missing person posters that remind me of NYC just after the World Trade Center attack and my stomach flips a little. After passing those, Madison sees a load of dead bodies. And they’re not zombies.

Daniel talks about how there would be people taken from his town periodically when he was a child. His father has told him that men do evil because of fear, but Daniel isn’t having any today. He tells Madison, who has returned from her trip outside, that if he doesn’t come back to take care of his daughter, and to be prepared because things will happen quickly once they get going.

Getting the old lady out of bed is an arduous task. Instead of taking Daniel with her, they grab Nick. A struggle ensues, but Nick gets hauled away. Madison is pretty pissed off, and at Travis too, since he’s such a freaking idiot, and believes the government involvement is actually going to improve things.

Oddly enough, for a zombie show, it was nothing of the kind tonight. Not necessarily a bad thing. Just sayin’.

Married to Medicine

I’ve said it before, that I will watch pretty much anything in regard to reality TV. I don’t always stick it out though. I loved The Real World the first several seasons, before it degenerated into drinking and hot tub sex. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but who wants to watch other people doing it? Seriously, it started off as an interesting glimpse into the world of just moving away from home to the big city. The cast had jobs, took classes, and we actually got to see some of whatever city it was through their eyes. Then, like Jerry Springer before them, MTV discovered there was a world of ratings in people debasing themselves. I haven’t watched it in a long time. For a while, I’d check in every so often, to see if anything had changed. It hadn’t.

I also tried to watch The Jersey Shore. I might have even made it all the way through the first season. Then it was just the same old and I stopped watching. Occasionally, I would forget why I stopped, tune in again, see Sammi and Ronnie either breaking or making up, remember, and tune back out. The only show that turned me off completely was The Littlest Groom, sort of a little person Bachelor. After about a half hour, the emphasis was so heavy on the sexual aspect, I got uncomfortable. It seemed geared toward fetishists and certainly not dignified. I didn’t make it through the first episode. While I don’t think The Bachelor/Bachelorette shows are very dignified either, I was able to take a couple of seasons of each.

I said all this to say, I watch Married to Medicine, but I’m starting to wonder why. A couple of the women seem normal, mostly Dr. Jacquie and Dr. Simone, but what up with these girls? Pretty much all they do is fight, call each other stupid bitches and ho’s, and create chaos. It’s a step above Bad Girls (ok, I do check that out sporadically, but I don’t kid myself that it’s anything other than a boxing match) and these are supposed to be doctors and doctors’ wives. Aren’t they embarrassed???

The first season, I saw two of them go at it physically, and I was like, whoa, are they married to the medicine they’re taking?

So that’s why I’ve never said anything about it. I don’t even know what to say.

September 13, 2015 — Cait & the Dead

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

I Am Cait

The meeting between Cait and Kris is finally happening. No big blow-out. Just a kind of normal conversation, albeit a sad one. Kris feels that Cait has “thrown her under the bridge” in the Vanity Fair article. I have to confess, I haven’t read it yet, but isn’t it thrown under the bus? Cait’s a transgender woman, not a troll. Cait talks about not being included in Kylie’s graduation. As much as I think Cait should probably have discussed her future plans with Kris a little earlier on, there was really no excuse for her leaving Cait out of these festivities. There are tears in their eyes, and I feel for them both, but I also think Kris is somewhat exaggerating about giving her “whole life” to the relationship. I understand I don’t know everything that went on behind closed doors, but it looked like Kris gave a lot more time to making money off of the kids, so it’s hard to have a lot of sympathy. On the few Kardashian shows I saw, she also didn’t seem to treat Cait (then Bruce) very well. I have the feeling these two have never actually had a real conversation

Cait is having a spiritual ceremony to claim her new name. There is some interesting conversation about spirituality and Biblical interpretation. Candis says the kids in Sunday school were mean to her. I have vague memories of the boys in catechism being mean when we were junior high school age (or middle school, depending on where you grew up).

Boy George is coming to the ceremony and since Candis is singing, she’s super nervous. The Gay Men’s Chorus of L.A. is also singing with her. I love the harmonies in a men’s chorus! Everyone is in white and looks beautiful.

As this is the season finale (that was quick), there are flashbacks and Cait ends the way she began, sans makeup and talking to the camera. She says it’s been an amazing journey (can we lose both “amazing” and “journey” on all reality TV shows?) and she finally feels like she fits in someplace. Jenny has said earlier that her mother told her it’s hard to hate someone whose story you know, and I tend to agree. Hopefully, hearing Cait’s story has inspired understanding.

It’s said that people remember less what you say and do, but more how you made them feel. And I think Cait is a person that leaves people feeling better about themselves. I hope we get to see the next chapter.

Fear the Walking Dead

When last we left him, Travis was trapped in the barber shop and Madison was trapped at home with her kids. Seeing Madison’s place, I’m wondering if the Texas Chainsaw Massacre guy is her decorator.

Does anyone really need to be told to stay away from the windows? Apparently, yes.There is a free-for-all going on outside, and Travis and his group escape amid looting, pushing and shoving. It’s nice to see some things haven’t changed. The chaos is escalating.

Madison and company gather up weapons like they live in Texas, and are about to split when Travis shows up to find Madison’s ex chomping on the family dog. Nice follow up shootin’ by the barber. I think this ain’t his first time at the rodeo. Well, maybe this rodeo, but he’s been to some kind of rodeo. Madison’s daughter foes back for some prescription bottles and almost gets eaten. See, kids? Drugs can kill you. Nick finally says what everyone has been ignoring. These people are dead. Light bulb moment!

The next morning, everyone is acting normal, putting out the trash and waving hello to dead neighbor Susan, trapped in the backyard. Don’t get too close – she bites! Travis wants to be an advocate for gun control, but I don’t think now is the time. Madison wants to finish Susan off with a hammer, but Travis tells her no, there still might be a way to help. Sorry, but if you’re looking like a walking corpse, and I mean literally, and it looks like you’d eat me given half a chance, I’m using that hammer.

The barber’s wife says they’ve been in worse situations. Really?! When? I thought I had a hard life, but I haven’t had any experience comparable to this.

I highly recommend Trader Joe’s Original Savory Thins rice crackers. Not cakes, crackers. They kind of taste like Rice Krispies, aren’t bad for you and are a bit addictive.

Uh-oh. Susan’s husband is home. This doesn’t look too good. That’s not a hug she’s going in for. Luckily, the back of her head gets taken off by some military guys who just showed up. Hmm…it looks like they might be rounding up the living too. It doesn’t say FEMA on their trucks, does it? Now it looks more like a census. Typical of them to not let anyone know what’s going on.

The barber isn’t liking this one bit, but Travis thinks it’s going to get better – now that the government has shown up to take control. Um…

As usual, I missed the second word to enter their contest. …sniff…

August 30, 2015 — Dating Cait, Dead People & a Train

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

 

I Am Cait

I don’t blame Cait for being apprehensive about dating. Any woman getting thrown back into the dating pool at 65 would be scared. Unless you’re Tina Turner or some other mega-fabulous being. Cait and friends go to a club where gorgeous guys are pole dancing and dollar bills are being thrown around. Poor Cait is so uncomfortable, it reminds me of Benjamin’s date with Elaine in The Graduate.

Quote of the episode – Cait referring to the club: “In The Abbey they’re all packin’.”

Um…just because Cait is uncomfortable with the strippers doesn’t have anything to do with her liking/not liking men. Seriously, Jenny? Jenny can be pretty astute though, pointing out that Cait has always escaped her problems through work. IMO, it’s better than escaping through drugs. At least you make money rather than spend it. Cait suggests that being with a man might make a transgender woman feel like “a real woman.” When Jenny asks what she means by that, she says “any other woman you see on the street.” Jenny then gives her the advice we should all heed, that Cait is “normal” right now and a woman doesn’t need a man to validate her and make her a woman. I’m sure there’s a country song in here somewhere. Welcome to my world Cait.

What was interesting is that Jenny also said Cait has too much work on the brain. Wasn’t she the same person who suggested Cait be a one-woman educator for the masses? I’m glad she’s come to see that Cait does care about the rest of the world and not just what’s in her shoe closet.

One of the sadder things brought up tonight is how often transgender women are made to think they’re only good for one thing once their transgender status has been revealed. That men will romance them until they find out, and after that’re reduced to late night booty calls. The words that have been hanging silently in the air throughout the series are finally given a voice. Maybe Cait should date Candis. I think she should. Candis is the whole package. I’d date Candis.

Cait tells Candis that the worst thing is to not have hope for the future. I totally agree. Lots of pearls of wisdom tonight.

Fear the Walking Dead

Who is this kid with the acne – in other words, the 30-year-old they’re trying to get us to believe is in high school – who keeps skulking around and obviously knows something? Ok, now he’s talking. Conspiracy theories and how when society crashes, it’s like Lord of the Flies. He’s also gotten the knife back that Madison confiscated from him in the first episode. Except a pocket knife against a zombie is hardly going to be effective, especially a fresh zombie. The knife’s metal is quickly tested on Principal Artie and Tobias (the acne-faced kid) has a hard time getting it through Artie’s thick skull.

Curtis and his ex are looking for their other son who is not Nick. He’s at some kind of protest where things are about to get out of hand. Everything is getting dicey with dead people coming back to life and of course the looters are busy. It’s nice to know that some things never change. A tragedy has happened? Quick! Let’s steal some TVs! The three hole up in a barber shop. As it gets even creepier outside, there is no way Travis can leave to meet Madison, the plan having been to leave Los Angeles together. Madison is at home with Nick & her daughter, Alicia. Things are not going well outside there either.

Will Travis be able to get away to meet Madison? Will Madison be able to get away to meet Travis? Why is it 2 weeks until the next episode?

Snowpiercer   (WARNING: SPOILERS)

Just to prove I don’t just watch schlock, let’s talk movies. I caught Snowpiercer on Showtime over the weekend. It was so good, even though I was at home, I didn’t even want to get up to go to the bathroom.

Giving a Reader’s Digest Condensed version of the plot, in trying to fix global warming, a huge miscalculation has been made and brings on another ice age, killing all life. Apparently, however, there was some warning, because the survivors are now bound for nowhere on a gigantic train. The train (the number of cars never talked about, but in the graphic novel, it’s 1000+) is a microcosm of society, with the elite being in the front cars, and the dregs of humanity in the back. Kind of like your everyday flight on a major airline. It’s a nightmare living in the back – they’ve been on the train for 17 years now – so it’s time for a revolution.

As the group of rebels goes forward through the train, I was reminded of The Warriors (1979), where a gang has to get back to their home turf, fighting various rivals (in various costumes and makeup!) as they make their way through New York City. Snowpiercer is very detail oriented, and I was fascinated with the different cars and the different groups of people.

There are lots of great fight scenes, which made me wonder if those In the tail section (or “the shoe” as Tilda Swinton reminds them, while the people in the front section are “the hat”) had been watching Ninja movies and doing strength training all those years, since they have extreme fighting down to a science. There is also a very weird break In the action because the new year arrives.

A lot of the characters are weird, although I guess I’d be weird too, if I was riding a train for 17 years. I hate being in the car for more than two hours. Tilda Swinton is remarkable as Minister Mason, a somewhat androgynous second in command, chewing the scenery, using words like “hooliganism,” and spewing forth great lines, such as, “You suffer from the misplaced optimism of the doomed.”

One of my favorite scenes was in the aquarium section (an absolutely gorgeous set!) where sushi is also served twice a year, and It just so happens that this is one of the times. As the insurgents prepare to dig in, leader Curtis stops Mason from eating, handing her one of the protein bars that the rear cars have been eating for years. No doubt she knows what it’s made out of – insects – something Curtis and crew discovered along the way. Although truthfully, that’s supposed to be one of the best sources of protein. I know. You eat it then.

The train itself reminded me of Coney Island’s rickety wooden roller coaster, Cyclone, the scary way it bounced along the tracks at breakneck speed. None of the parts are getting any younger either, and when she blows, it’s a phenomenal scene. Somehow, I missed this in the theater. It’s a shame because it’s just the kind of film I like to see at the movies. Lots of special effects and blowing things up. It makes me feel like I’m getting my money’s worth, since it costs as much as a cruise for a ticket now. Thank God for the dollar store, so I don’t have to take out a second mortgage to get candy.

I can understand why, at the end, Curtis doesn’t want the job of overseeing humanity. My first job in NYC was with a place that took ticket orders for shows before TicketMaster was born. I was a supervisor for a while and I hated it. I didn’t want to tell other adults when they were allowed to have a bathroom break. So I know how you feel, Curtis.

The story was taken from a graphic novel, but I wish it was a “real” book because I have a few questions. The most pressing of which concerns a polar bear seen at the end of the film. If the earth had was uninhabitable, and all life dead (we saw this to be true looking out the windows throughout the film), where did it come from? It can’t be evolution, because there was nothing to evolve from except snow. Did God put it there? Did it fall out of the train? Will it eat those kids who survived?

Snowpiercer made me laugh, it made me cry, it made me watch it a second time. It was one of those movies where afterward, you don’t want to watch anything else, because you know it will pale in comparison.

Sunday, August 23, 2015 – The New Normal & The New Real: Cait & The Dead

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What I Watched Today

(random, rambling thoughts on today’s TV)

I Am Cait

I’ve really been enjoying this show. Having had two friends who are transgender (sadly, one of them passed away last year), it’s interesting to watch the changes Cait is going through. I’m well aware there are many people, including some of her friends, who think the show has been all about makeup, hair and wardrobe, but that is the circle Cait travels in, so it’s natural for glamour to be a part of it. Would you have her go around in rags with a Nene wig just to prove some point?

As usual, tonight Cait had a lot on her plate, not only meeting with one of her male friends for the first time since her transition, but also taking a trip to New York City to address the LGBT community. While she had to navigate the former on her own (which went well), a group of friends accompanied her to NYC where a great time was had by all. I was sad to hear that Holly Woodlawn (part of Andy Warhol’s Factory and an entertainer in her own right) is not doing well healthwise though.

I can’t say as I ever thought a lot about Bruce Jenner. While the Kardashians aren’t exactly my cup of tea, I did see their show a handful of times.  He barely seemed to be there, and I often thought Kris and the girls were rude to him, but I also thought that was the part he was playing, that of the hapless father. Now that Bruce is Caitlyn, I see a warm and witty Jenner, loaded with personality and passion.  And I certainly see a multi-dimensional woman who isn’t just about the clothes. (Although one of the funniest moments so far was Kim telling Cait that her mother has the same dress when going through Cait’s closet.) I also see Cait as an extremely sensitive human being with great concern about those who don’t have the privileges that she does. There’s nothing wrong with her occasional over-enthusiasm about her own life. How would you feel if, at 65, you were suddenly reborn as the person you always were inside? It’s sad that some misunderstandings and conflicts have arisen between Cait and the Kardashian/Jenner clan, but I think eventually those will be resolved.

That being said, I desperately want to throw a Come As You Really Are party.

Fear the Walking Dead

I was glad to hear about this spin-off, since I’ve wanted The Walking Dead to expand its territory for a while.

My first thought: Were they setting up a Renaissance Faire at that church and why is that guy wearing a Medieval style shrug? My second thought: Thanks for having a commercial before the first 5 minutes is even up.

Favorite line: Madison: “You need to spend less time online. If there was a problem, we’d know about it. The authorities would tell us.” Now where have I heard that before? Could it be Dr. Hirsch from American Werewolf in London?  I’m certain that if a monster were out roaming northern England we’d have seen it on the telly.“

Let me get this straight, main character Travis slips in a pool of blood and viscera the size of the state of Rhode Island, but instead of getting the cops, he brings his girlfriend, Madison, back with him to investigate further? The kid on drugs (Nick, Madison’s son) seems to be the most sensible one so far. He’s also going to be the most in shape, since he also seems to be doing a lot of running.

A good portion episode was a set up for what’s to come (and judging by the preview, it’s a lot), introducing the characters and letting us know what makes them tick, with sprinkles of zombie payoff here and there. The crescendo ending, when Nick’s dealer/friend Calvin almost takes a bite out of Travis and Madison, was a nice taste (no pun intended) of the future. Although once again, a Black man is the first to go.

All in all, I thought the hour and a half went by very quickly, and I’m looking forward to the next episode. A little more character driven than its counterpart, The Walking Dead, it gives a fresh perspective on the destruction of society.

Although I can’t wait for Z Nation to be back. Tongue and cheekier, it’s secretly my favorite of the zombie bunch. Since its new season begins on September 11, I’m highly unlikely to forget when it starts again.