Tag Archives: Lisa Vanderpump

June 16, 2020 – Post Wedding Trauma, VanderEnd, a Final Finale, Goodbye Loving, Sandy Correct, Tyler Does Good & Farewell

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Since GH is apparently using a Flashback dartboard, today’s episode was from September 24th, 2013. Morgan and Kiki (who had switched over from being Starr) had just gotten married. Starr Kiki really loved Michael, but Morgan had lied, telling her that she and Michael were cousins, when Kiki’s father was really Silas, but she didn’t know it. Sonny, who was off his meds, spilled the beans at the reception, even though Morgan had begged him to keep the secret. Sonny claimed he was doing it for Connie, who’d wanted him to tell the truth, and who he hadn’t protected. He told everyone that Morgan had tricked Kiki into marriage, and they all went in different directions.

Morgan told Ava that his family was a bunch of hypocrites, especially his father, and his father was dead to him. Ava told him that family stays together, and not to write Sonny off, but Morgan said he’d never forgive Sonny, who had never once backed him. Sonny had, however, stepped up to double-cross him, costing him his wife, who was off with Michael doing who-knows-what. Ava said she knew what it was like to be refused by the person you love, and told Morgan about how the man she loved went off with someone else. Morgan said Ava got him, and had always been on his side, prompting them to get busy.

What Kiki and Michael were doing was talking at the MetroCourt bar. Michael wanted Kiki to give him a chance, and they kissed.

In the meantime, Maxie had been a surrogate for Lulu and Dante, who named the baby Connie, but it wasn’t really their baby; it was Maxie’s baby with Spinelli. Maxie whacked Spinelli over the head, thinking he was a prowler, when he was picking up his gym bag from the apartment. Ellie had told Spinelli the truth, but Maxie thought she’d been given a second chance to make things right, since she’d lost the first baby she’d carried for Dante and Lulu. She figured Spinelli and Ellie would have their own family, and told Spinelli choosing Lulu was the least bad of two terrible options. She said there was no turning back, and she’d be sorry for the rest of her life. Spinelli said he hated what Maxie had done, but didn’t hate her.

Carly had gotten Sonny the hell out of the reception, and told him that his behavior was the result of him not taking his pills. The last time he’d done that, he’d been dangerous to everyone around him, even the people who love him. Sonny said he’d thrown the pills away, because he wanted to feel the pain; he owed that to Connie. Carly asked if he thought Connie would want him to hurt and want him to hurt others. Luckily, the pills were safely balanced on the top of the wastebasket, where no garbage had actually touched them. Carly gave them to Sonny, telling him that his kids needed their dad.

Silas (who would later become Finn) was dating Sam, and brought dinner to her while she was at the hospital with Danny.

Carly told Sonny that taking the pills was the right thing to do. He said he missed Connie so much, but Carly said, then he shouldn’t hurt himself and his family in Connie’s name. This convinced him to take his lithium.

Michael told Kiki, they didn’t have to figure it out tonight, that tonight was for them, and Morgan and Ava got busier.

Vanderpump Rules – The Endless Reunion – Part Three (@home)

I never noticed before that in the opening group pic, it’s a still shot except for Lisa’s hair blowing. I knew she was magical.

We wait for Tom, who had to pee. Ariana asks why Tom didn’t go during the break, and announces that she pooped. Thanks for sharing.

Andy say,s Stassi’s push to be engaged almost sent Beau to an early grave. We flash back to all that, including Stassi catching Katie’s bouquet. Stassi says she’s embarrassed. (FYI, I’m totally refraining from any and all jokes, and working on something about the whole Bravo brouhaha.) Stassi does a mini PSA, saying, if you know you’re asking your SO to marry you, don’t torture them, just tell them. Andy says Beau went to great lengths to make Stassi think he wasn’t proposing, and we flash back to him avoiding the subject, and telling her not to rush him. Beau says the dinner where she thought he was going to propose was the worst night all year. Stassi says Beau put on a mic pad that looked like the shape of a ring box. It convinced her they were getting engaged, and she lost her sh*t. Schwartz asks, what’s sexier, a penis bulge or a ring bulge? Andy brings up Carter texting them not to forget that Kristen introduced them, and asks if Kristen agrees. She says she doesn’t, and if Carter had wanted to say that, he should have waited. Stassi says Kristen defended him in every interview, but Kristen says she doesn’t respect what did, and Lala tells her, leave it there.

Andy says, Lisa has dealt with unruly bartenders and defiant waitresses, but this season, she had to manage the managers. We flash back to Danica getting suspended for putting her hands on the other Brett. Andy asks what makes Max a good manager, and Lisa says he puts in a lot of hours, he’s a great bartender and can step in when he’s needed, and the staff loves him. He fits in perfectly. She wishes he wouldn’t bang her staff though. She thinks Danica needs to grow up and soften up. She sees things in black and white, and gets it wrong sometimes. Raquel says Danica is the best manager. She gets the job done. Lisa says Danica has been rude on many occasions, and she has a personal issue with her. That Danica claimed she was having an affair with Brett, pisses her off. In all the years she’s been in the business, she’s never put a finger on anyone. Danica asks when she said that, and we see a clip of the after-show where she says she can’t see a mother/son dynamic with Brett and Lisa. They’re both hot, so you know they fantasize about each other. Lisa says she has children and a husband. Kristen says Danica is lucky she has a job. She should be thankful, grateful, and bow down. Danica says she’s sorry; it came out the wrong way. Lisa thanks her, and says she’s been married 37 years, and has two children. She doesn’t need to hear stuff like that. Andy asks Max if banning someone for talking sh*t is the manager’s job, referring to him wanting to ban Danica from TomTom. Max says he thinks he handled it incorrectly, and he already apologized. Lisa says Danica felt backstabbed, since she thought they were friends. Danica says whenever she introduced Max to her friends, he’d screw them, and she has to work with him. Max says she’s the one who hooked them up. Kristen thinks there’s a problem because Danica wants to sleep with Max, but Danica says, no way. Andy leaves it there and takes a break.

Brittany’s dog barks, and she gets criticized, which is ridiculous. She says, since there’s a pandemic, she couldn’t get a sitter. I say, bring the dog into the discussion. He’ll give just as coherent a contribution as the cast. Andy asks James what he thought about Scheana and Brett’s video, and he says he thought it was racy. Andy asks if that’s why Brett felt uncomfortable and violated. Brett admits he was being dramatic in saying he felt violated, but he was uncomfortable. Scheana says he should have explained that to her at the time, instead of being a p*ssy. Saying she’d give him a BJ was a joke. Lisa says Scheana did like him when they first met, and thought there was a possibility. Scheana says they clicked right away, and we flash back to her telling Lisa that she admits there’s a crush, but she doesn’t want to date him, then gets all teary. Scheana says she’s flirty by nature. Andy says Charli was completely over him before the first date. What turned her off so quickly? Charli says there was a lot going on prior to the date, and she felt awkward about Scheana. We flash back to Brett saying he can’t have friends that are girls. Andy asks how Scheana and Brett are now, and Scheana says, they’d been fine up until the last few episodes aired. Then Brett said he was going to be so far up her ass apologizing at the reunion, but she’s still waiting. Brett says he felt bad about some things, and Kristen suggests he just apologize for being an a-hole. Brett says he’s sorry he misled Scheana, but he tried to make it clear that he didn’t want anything. Scheana says she didn’t want anything either, and Ariana says, how about apologizing for saying one thing to his friend’s face, and something else behind their back? Brett says he doesn’t think he did that.

Andy says Ariana was forthcoming about her battle with depression, and asks how she’s doing. Ariana says she’s been seeing a therapist for the last few months, and she’s been working hard on herself. She’d be lying if she said it was all positive all the time, but she thinks she’s doing okay. Andy says Lisa had shared with Ariana that she’d also felt that way, and Lisa says she was more prepared for her mother passing away, but her brother’s death was a shock. That it was a suicide made it worse, and that’s why she understood, and didn’t think it should be minimized. Ariana says she’s grateful to Lisa, and thanks her. Lisa says Ariana can call her, any time of the day or night.

Andy says, Brittany and Jax had a fairytale wedding, but once they got home, Jax had left all traces of his Prince Charming persona in Versailles (pronouncing it Ver-sales). We see clips of Jax taking out his sh*t on Brittany, and anyone else in his path. We flash back to Ariana’s interview, where she says, unfortunately, Brittany is married to the problem, and we flash back to Stassi telling Jax, it looks like he’s losing his mind. We see one of Lisa’s interviews, where she says, it’s not just Jax now; that’s the difference. Andy says Jax seems to spiral at the end of every summer. Jax says it’s his downfall, and he’s still working on himself. Ariana says she doesn’t want to spend 45 minutes on the same sh*t. Every reunion, Jax says he’s a work in progress. I hate when people like Jax use that phrase as an excuse for bad behavior. We flash back to Jax saying the same things at every reunion. Jax says he’ll be working on himself for the rest of his life. Tom says, like his tweeting lies. Everyone talks at once, so you can’t understand anyone, and there’s a lot of bleeping on top of it. Jax says he knows they’re perfect and awesome, and he applauds. Ariana says she’s a garbage person. That’s why she’s here. Lisa tells her, calm down, and Jax says it’s not about her.

Andy reminds us, if we lost track, it’s Tuesday. He moves on to the beach clean-up, and Jax’s rage texts. Jax says it was nothing against Max. He just didn’t want to drive for hours to pick up one piece of paper, when there are three parks near him that are full of trash. Which might be a valid argument if he’d been at those parks picking up said trash. Stassi is like, come on. He just didn’t want to do it, and Kristen says, so it had nothing to do with the environment. He didn’t want to go. Jax says he apologized five hours later, and we flash back to more rage texting hours later. Schwartz says, it was personal and pointed, and Jax says he’s good at apologizing. I’m not so sure that’s something to be bragging about. Andy doesn’t think Jax is that great at it, since you can apologize a million times and not mean it. Jax asks if Andy hasn’t ever done that, and Andy says, not really. He asks Brittany if it’s daunting to have to apologize for Jax all the time, and Jax says, no one is perfect. Andy recalls that Jax said that at every one of eight reunions. Ariana makes fun of Jax, which is unbecoming, even if Jax is a total d-bag. Jax says he thought he was doing better, and still has bad days. Stassi says he instills fear in his friends. They have to be scared of pissing him off, and of hurting Brittany’s feelings. They need to be able to be honest, and can’t be in a situation they’re scared to have an opinion of. Jax told them about how depressed he was, and that he couldn’t control himself, so now they want to talk about it. Jax says, it’s fine coming from certain people. Andy asks for Ariana’s reaction to Jax admitting he had a mental problem, and Brittany says, he obviously does. Ariana says her best advice is to find a therapist he connects with, and work through his sh*t. He can’t let it fall by the wayside. It has to be a priority. Andy says, Rand recommended a therapist, and Lala says, he didn’t just recommend one. He paid for a session, and Jax didn’t show up. Tom says, Jax doesn’t want to get better or change, and he doesn’t want to hear that Jax is a work in progress. I totally get this. I know people who cry about needing help, but won’t take it because they’d rather keep using their illness to be a manipulative a-hole. They’re the worst. Brittany says the group obviously doesn’t love them, and Lala says she’d die for them. Brittany won’t look at anyone, and Ariana says she’s fully convinced nothing she said came from an ill place. Brittany says she’s turning her head because she’s trying not to cry. Tom says, after the end of the season, day after day, Brittany always takes up for Jax. Brittany says, everyone does stuff, and Ariana says it’s happening every week. Katie asks Schwartz, what’s happening? and I’m wondering too. Brittany says of course she wants Jax to be better, and Jax says he’s working on it all the time, but it seems like they’re just yelling at him. Schwartz says, it’s a productive thing. Jax alluded to having issues several times, and they’re being corrective. They want him to be proactive, and not do the same thing every time and expect a different result. Ariana says they love Brittany so much, and Tom says he’s wracked his brain for years, trying to help. Ariana says, and Jax acts like they don’t give a f***, and they’re full of it. There’s lots of bleeping, and I wonder what the hell is with Schwartz’s hair, and if he meant for it to look like that. Schwartz tells Jax, please effing do something.

Andy asks where everyone is going, but they’re just stretching their legs. Jax says Andy is always against him, but everyone tells Jax that Andy is on his side. Jax says he feels like Andy goes at him the hardest. He has thick skin, but it’s being worn away as the years go by. Andy says he actually likes Jax a lot, and Jax says he has a weird way of showing it. Andy says it’s his job to call them out. Jax insists he’s the best he’s been, except for three episodes spread apart. We see clips of Jax that would embarrass a normal person. Andy says Jax doesn’t watch the show, and he should if he wants to respond to sh*t. Jax says if he slips up, it’s all they talk about, and Andy says, watch the show; that’s what he’s working off of. Jax says, it’s the worst reunion ever.

Andy says Scheana’s surprise birthday present of a psychic reading for Dayna didn’t go well, and Scheana had first said she didn’t bring the psychic. We flash back to Scheana having the psychic wait outside. He asks, what really happened? and Scheana says she was going to text the psychic after talking to Dayna, and let her know if it was still happening. The experience for her was incredible, and she assumed it would be the same for Dayna. Andy asks why Dayna was bothered, and Dayna starts to cry. She says she knows Scheana meant it in a good way, but she felt put on spot. It’s been seven years since her mom passed away, and it’s still hard. She doesn’t know if she’ll ever be ready. It’s frustrating for her. She wanted to do it, but had to back out. She was scared of a response either way. She says, people think she’s a bitch, but it’s been her only option most of her life. Lisa asks, why? and Dayna says her dad’s not in her life. After her mom died, it was just her and her sister, and she was only twenty-two. She’s never felt at home for one minute since her mother stopped breathing, and she’s been looking for that. I totally get this, since I always say, I want to go home, but there’s no home to go to anymore. Kristen says she wishes they could hug Dayna. If it was a normal reunion, they would be in a giant circle. Jax says he lost both of his parents; he doesn’t speak to his mom. Unless someone has gone through that, they can’t understand the pain. Andy asks if Jax has considered the time he’s losing in not speaking to his mom, and Jax says, it’s been tough with the virus going on. Ariana knows they hate each other, but tells him to try and give his mom a call. Dayna says, people are quick to judge, and say life is short, but every situation is different. She tried hard to have her dad in her life, but it didn’t work, and she has to live with that.

Andy wants to switch topics to the girls. He asks how Ariana felt, finding out it was Lala who had been talking smack about her house, and not Stassi. We flash back to Scheana relaying the wrong shade to Kristen, and Stassi says she knows Scheana is a sh*t stirrer, but how could she be so messy? Ariana can say Stassi is Regina George or a snob, because that’s definitely true, but what she said came so easy, like she was waiting to get it out. She doesn’t know how many years it will take Ariana to understand that she likes her. Ariana says she felt like they’d worked hard on the friendship, and she lost it. She didn’t even know what she’d said until she watched the show. Lala asks on what planet Stassi would say she’s a grown-ass woman. It didn’t sound like her. Ariana says she’s pivoting everything she said about Stassi to Lala.

We see everyone texting in a group chat, and paying no attention whatsoever. Andy says, bromances over romances are easier said than done, and we see clips from the messy triangle that is Max, Dayna, and Brett. Andy says if Max decided he didn’t want to be with Dayna, why did he think he had a say in who she was with. Max says he didn’t. He and Brett were inseparable – he was the Sandoval to Brett’s Schwartz. Brett says Dayna knew he was skeptical to begin with since he was considering Max. Andy thinks Brett and Max should date, and Lisa says, cheers to that. Schwartz says it’s obvious Max’s feelings were hurt, and Stassi asks, why? Dayna went to him first, and he turned her down. Brett says he realized they were moving too fast. Dayna says they were hanging out a few times a week, and sleeping together (these people are so weird, I don’t know if she means having sex or just sleeping), then Brett said they were moving too fast, and she was over it. She has no more room in her life for one more person who’s not sure or not invested in a relationship. She’s learned about herself. She’s beautiful and she deserves it. Andy says he’s leaving it there.

Andy asks Danica what about the Scheana clone bothered her at the party? Danica says Scheana 2.0 was inserting herself in a conversation where she wasn’t welcome. She told her to bounce, and she didn’t want to. We flash back to their altercation, and Stassi says she wasn’t mad about it. Lisa says Danica is in hospitality, and has to check herself. She can’t have a loose cannon representing the business. Danica says she was completely wrong, and Lisa says she can’t afford someone on the floor who’s so explosive. They’re going to have to talk. Danica says Max’s plan worked out; congratulations. Andy asks how intense it was for James to see Rand, and asks how the relationship has been. James says, amazing, and we flash back to his apology and their bro hug. James says he’s come a long way, and he’s glad Rand pushed Lala back into his life. He’s a stand-up guy, and James hopes their friendship grows. Lala says, it’s been amazing to see James’s growth, and Rand is the most incredible human she’s ever met. She thanks James for his kind words.

Andy says before they have their final thoughts, he wonders if Kristen misses her friendships. Kristen says she doesn’t miss the sh*t, but she misses the friendships. She wishes she could have shared her relationship with new boyfriend Alex, her house, and the monumental moments she’s had. Andy asks, what about Jax and Tom? and Jax says he’s happy with the current status of how things are going. Andy says, the current status is on hold. Lisa says, all of their current status is on hold, and she hopes what the world has been going through in the past few months has given them perspective, and caused them to be reflective. She wants them to come back with the same cohesion they went into this with. Brittany thinks if they could have hung out, they could get through it, but she hasn’t seen any effort; it’s only been hearsay. Lisa says when they get back, she expects they’ll have made a concentrated effort to put it together. Andy says, that’s a good transition.

He thanks everyone for accepting the technology needed for the reunion into their homes. He welcomes Ken, Rand, and Scheana’s new squeeze Brock to the reunion. Lisa says it’s the first time she’s seen Ken in a shirt in two months. Everyone waves. Andy asks Ken how it is being trapped at Villa Rosa with Lisa for two months, and Ken says, it’s fantastic. He’s getting three amazing meals a day. Lisa says he’s missing going to work. Andy says Rand was reluctant to be on the show, and Lala didn’t even use his name in the beginning, calling him her man. He asks how the experience was, and Rand says he was petrified, but at the end of the day, this is Lala’s family, and it was time to jump in and support her. Everyone made it easy. Andy asks what Brock has learned about Scheana, and Brock says, Scheana is a good person. He digs her more all the time. He thinks they all really love each other; it’s somewhere in there. Lisa says she’s grateful for all of them. James’s sobriety is extraordinary. She wants to see them on the other side. Bless them.

Andy says what sounds like, to the Banana Republic, and everyone takes a drink of their cocktail or mocktail. Andy says he can’t wait to see them in person, and tells everyone, stay healthy.

If Loving You Is Wrong

It doesn’t say finale in the guide, which rubs me the wrong way, since it’s the final finale. I hope they wrap some things up, and we’re not just left hanging all over the place.

Marcie can’t stop whacking Randal in the head with the fireplace poker. If he’s not dead, he’s a host from Westworld. She bashes him a couple more times for good measure. She pulls a bookcase down, then hits him again, saying she hates him. She kicks him, and says, get up. If he wants to fight, then fight. Did he think it was going to be easy? It dawns on her that Randal is not getting up. Covered in blood, she grabs her bag, and jets.

Bennett comes home, but he doesn’t go home. Instead, he goes to Randal’s house. He sees Randal lying there, and says, no, goddammit. He kicks Randal, and says someone beat him to it.

Marcie goes to Brad’s house, where Alex is still passed out on the couch. Brad asks her what happened? and she says, Randal. He asks if they argued, and she says he attacked her while she was walking to the car. She was going to her car, and he grabbed her, and they fought. Brad asks if she’s okay, and says he warned Randal. He’s going to kill him. He tells Marcie, he’s going over there, but she says she killed him. He’s dead. Alrighty then.

Rick walks into Randal’s house, and draws his gun. He says, police; don’t move, and tells Bennett to put his hands on his head and get down on his knees. Bennett does, and Rick tells him to put his hands behind his back. Bennett says he didn’t do anything. He didn’t do this. He found Randal. Rick says he doesn’t want to hear it. Rick takes him to the squad car. Um… Rick, there’s no blood on him. I think there would be some. Rick calls for an ambulance, and CSI. Bennett repeats that he didn’t do it. He walked in, and Randal was dead. Rick tells him, be quiet, and goes back in the house. He radios that Randal has been beaten to a pulp. He has no pulse, and there’s brain matter. He needs the coroner.

Brad tells Marcie, calm down. We hear sirens, and she says, the police are here. He says, maybe Randal called the police, and she asks if he thinks Randal is okay. He says, why else would they be there? and tells her that he’ll go and check. He asks her again, what happened? and she says she told him. She grabbed a fireplace poker, and stabbed Randal over and over. Brad says he’ll go see; stay there. She tells him, just go, and he leaves.

Brad approaches Rick, who tells him, stay back. Brad asks, what happened? and Rick points to the coroner’s van, and says, that happened. Brad asks if someone is dead, and Rick says, yeah. Brad asks if he’s sure, and Rick says, there’s no way not to be. Brad asks, who is it? and Rick says, Randal. Brad asks, what happened? but RIck says he can’t tell Brad. From the car, Bennett says, he didn’t do it, Brad says, he did it? and I gasp. I can’t believe Brad is going to let this be pinned on Bennett. Rick tells Brad, go back in his house, and Bennett says he’s telling Rick, he didn’t do it. Rick goes back to the car, and asks what Bennett’s name is. Bennett says, Rick knows his name, and he didn’t do it. He drove up, and a bloody woman in a blue dress was leaving. Rick asks what kind of car she was driving, and Bennett says take him to the station and he’ll tell Rick. He needs to get back to his wife. Kelly runs out, with Tyrell behind her, and Brad makes a return appearance. Kelly asks Rick, what happened? and Rick says, Randal; he’s dead. Someone killed him. Kelly asks, who? and Rick says he doesn’t know, but he has a man in the car. Kelly sees Bennett, and says, no way. What did Randal do to him? Brad says, whatever he did, Bennett got him back. Tyrell says, this neighborhood is crazy, and Kelly says, he’s right about that.

Lushion, Steven, and Natalie are at Esperanza’s house, along with a couple of uniformed officers. Lushion tells Esperanza, the FBI is all over it, and she says they better find her. Steven says, it’s all right, but she says, it’s not all right. Where the hell is Eddie? Lushion says he doesn’t know, and she says, it’s all Eddie’s fault. Natalie tells her, calm down, but Esperanza says she’s not calming down. If she doesn’t have her daughter back unharmed, she’s going to… Natalie pulls her back, and Steven and Lushion step aside to talk. Steven asks if Lushion heard the radio, and Lushion says, a homicide. Steven says, on his street, and Lushion says, that’s Randal’s address. Steven asks if Randal is dead, and Lushion says, that’s what he’s hearing. Steven says, no way it’s connected, but Lushion doesn’t know. Esperanza asks why they’re whispering, and Steven says, it’s nothing. She asks if it has to do with Mica, and he says, no. She wants to talk to the FBI, and tells Natalie, if something happens to Mica, she’s dead.

Rick tells an officer that Bennett says he didn’t do it, but he walked in and Bennet had a fireplace poker in his hand. Book him Danno. Kelly asks if Randal is really dead, and Rick says, yeah. She says, wow, and Rick says they really wanted him dead. There was a lot of overkill. He’s got to take Bennett in, but it’s good to see her out. He suggests they go out to celebrate, and she says, a guy just died. Rick says she didn’t like him anyway, but she says, he’s still a human being. Rick asks who the buff guy is who’s standing there, and she says, Justice’s father. Rick says she didn’t tell him. He thought they had… forget it. Kelly thanks him for everything he did, and he says he’s glad she’s out. Rick leaves, and Tyrell asks Kelly, who was that? She says, a police officer, and he says he can see that. She asks if he’s jealous, and tells him, go on in the house. Tyrell says, the way Rick was looking at her, and touching her shoulder; he obviously likes her. She tells him, go in the house, and he asks, how many men she has now. She says, a man just died, and he wants to talk about this? Show some respect. He asks if Randal was a friend of hers too. He’s a little concerned. She says, no; she hated Randal. He asks why she isn’t happy. Why is she acting all broken up? She says she can’t. She’s going to babysit. The same thing he’s supposed to be doing with their son. She tells him, go in the house.

Larry’s wife cries over him at the hospital. Ian comes in, and she leans on his shoulder. Ian asks how Larry is, and she says, he’s sedated. Ian asks what the doctors are saying, and she says, they have to remove his legs, and he has severe hematoma. Ian says he’s so sorry, and she says she wants them dead. He says he’s sure that’s been taken care of, and she says, Casey will do it; he’ll wipe them all out – and his daughter. She wants them to drain the swamp, and tells Ian to create a hashtag that its going. Larry calls to her, and tells Ian, you don’t want to mess with his wife. He asks if Ian is with them, and Ian says he is. Larry says, no more messing around, and Ian says, none. He’s sorry. Larry says, don’t be. Eddie’s not going to make it through the night. Ian asks where the kid is, and Larry says, get him out. Larry’s wife says, Ian played him; he played them. Get out. Larry calls Ian a traitor; after everything Larry did for him. He tells his wife, if he doesn’t make it, burn Ian. She says he’s going to make it, and Larry says, make sure it gets all the way done. He can’t feel his legs, and he’s going to get them.

On the phone, Lushion asks what Ian’s got, but Ian says he tried to get Larry to tell him where the kid is, but now he won’t let Ian near him. Lushion is going to have to find her. Send someone down to get the phone. Lushion says he’s doing it now, and Ian says, hurry up; he’s in bad shape. Lushion tells Steven to go get Larry’s phone. Steven says Esperanza needs him, but Lushion insists. Steven tells Esperanza, it’s a small lead; that’s all he can say. He’ll be back. Lushion tells her that they’re checking all the possibilities, and Esperanza says, they’re lucky it’s not happening to them. They can keep calm and collected. Lushion says, it’s all right, and tells Steven to go.

Brad – who I hate at this moment – runs downstairs with new clothes for Marcie. Marcie says they’re not hers, but Brad says they have to clean her up. She says she did it; she killed him. She really killed him. They’re going to come for her. Brad says, as far as they’re concerned, she did nothing. They already have a suspect. She says, no. She can’t let him take the rap for something she did. Brad says, it’s done. She did nothing. She looks at him, and he says she has to wash her hands and clean under her nails. Marcie keeps repeating, she killed him, and Brad says they have to clean her up. They can’t see her like this. She did nothing. She wonders what if they come over, and he says, it will be okay. She’s going to be fine. He asks if she’s okay, and she says, no. He tells her that Randal got what he deserved, and she says he made her so mad. Brad says, the bastard deserved it, and she says, he did, but Bennett doesn’t. Brad holds her, and says, everything is okay. She says she can’t let someone go down for a crime she committed, and Brad says she doesn’t know him, like this makes it okay. She asks who it is, and he says, the neighbor from across the street. She says, he’s a nice guy; she has to tell them. Brad says, she’ll tell them nothing. Let him do this. They’re going to swap her clothes for Alex’s. Alex won’t know, and they’ll ride off into the sunset with the kids. Marcie says, he’s that angry with Alex? A lawyer brought her there; this isn’t going to work. Brad says, she’s out of it. They’ll say they went to bed, got up, and found out she did it. Marcie says, he’s a lawyer, and Brad says, then he can get Alex off. He tells her to grab her makeup, and give him the dress. Make sure she covers the bruise on her face. Brad takes off Alex’s shoes.

Steven and Rick go to Larry’s hospital room. Steven tells Larry’s wife that he’s there for Larry’s phone, but she says he doesn’t have one. Larry opens his eyes, and Rick asks where his belongings are.  The nurse said they’re in there. Larry says they can’t take his phone, but Steven says they can and will. Larry says they need a warrant, and Steven says he has it right there. Does Larry want to read it? Give him the phone. Steven tells Rick to find it, and Rick starts searching. Larry’s wife tells them, get out, and Steven asks if she wants to be hit with a thorough investigation. Rick finds Larry’s phone in the locker, and Steven asks what the passcode is. Larry says he can’t remember, and Steven grabs Larry’s hand, putting it on the phone. Steven says, got it, and Larry says he’ll sue their asses. They leave, and in the hallway, Rick suggests Steven hurry before it locks again. Steven asks if Rick doesn’t have something to do. Rick says he was just trying to help. He’s out, and hopes Steven finds what he’s looking for.

Natalie gives Esperanza some water, and Esperanza says she needs to move around. She wonders where the FBI is, and Lushion says, they’re on it. She asks why they haven’t called, and Natalie says, they will. Esperanza says she shouldn’t have hit Mica. They never tell you the person you love most in life, you’ll hate with a passion. Eddie poisoned Mica; his flesh and blood. Who does that to a child? Natalie says, Eddie, and Esperanza asks why he had to bring Mica into their problems. She tells Natalie, Eddie hit her too, today, and Natalie asks if that was the first time. Esperanza says, it was, and Natalie asks if she’s sure. Esperanza says, the only thing that matters right now is her daughter. She admits Eddie pushed her and got in her face, and Natalie says, that’s abuse. Esperanza says she knows. Why does Natalie think she left him? Their daughter is the only thing on earth she has. If Mica doesn’t come back, she swears she’ll kill him. Natalie says Mica will be back.

Eddie waits for Ian in the parking garage, and tases him for like, 30 seconds. He tells Ian, he has nothing to lose. Where is his daughter? Ian says he doesn’t know, and Eddie tases him again, asking, where is she? Ian had better think quick. Eddie tases Ian again, and Ian screams. Eddie asks where his daughter is. Larry wouldn’t tell him, so Ian had better think of answers real quick, damn him. Ian tries to get up, but Eddie gets some duct tape (he probably keeps a handy roll in his pocket), and tapes the taser to Ian’s back, so that it just keeps going. He asks if Ian likes it, and tells Ian to think about his daughter. Ian just lies there, and Eddie says he should have talked.

Unless the whole town and everyone in it blows up, there’s no way this story is ending neatly. They’ve only got twenty more minutes.

Eddie walks into Larry’s room, and Larry’s wife tells him, get out. He punches her in the face, and she drops to the floor. He asks if Larry thinks he’s done with him. He grabs Larry by the collar of his hospital gown, and says, tell him. Larry says he doesn’t know, and Eddie grabs a pillow. Larry insists he doesn’t know, and Eddie puts the pillow over Larry’s face, and pushes down. He says he can’t hear Larry. He lifts the pillow, and Larry gives him an address, saying she’s in a container or something; it’s hard to understand him. Eddie asks if she can breathe, and puts the pillow back on Larry’s face. He lifts it again, and Larry cries out. He says he doesn’t know, and Eddie resumes smothering him, and pressing harder. Eddie says, Larry can’t breathe. I’m not sure, but I think Larry is dead. Yep; he’s flatlining. Remind me not to go to this hospital. Ever. Their security is worse than at GH.

A security guard finds Ian, and asks if he’s all right. He removes the taser, and calls for a stretcher. He tells Ian, hang in with him. He sees Eddie coming, and says they need help. Eddie grabs his taser, and the guard says, someone did this to Ian. Eddie says he doesn’t give a sh*t. This wore his battery down. He kicks Ian, and walks off. The guard is like, WTF?

Rick knocks on Brad’s door, and asks for Marcie. I hate Brad and Marcie. Rick says he needs the body ID’d, and Brad asks if it has to happen right now. Rick says, sorry, and Brad says he’ll go with her, and Rick asks if he doesn’t have kids. Brad asks if Randal isn’t next door, but Rick says he’s at the morgue. Rick also has a couple of questions. Marcie asks, about what? and he says, an eyewitness saw a female leaving the house; bloody, and wearing a blue dress. He sees Alex, and asks, who’s that? Brad says, his ex-wife. He invites Rick in, and Rick asks if Brad minds if he asks Alex a few questions. This is probably because Alex is now wearing Marcie’s blue dress, with blood stains on it. Mind you, the dress looks like it has uniform splatters on it, and the rest of Alex is totally pristine. Which is actually hard to believe after the night she had. Brad says Alex is out of it, and Rick asks, for how long? Brad says, she came home drunk, and she’s been doing drugs. She blacks out, and does things she doesn’t remember. Rick rouses Alex, and she swats at him, saying, don’t touch her. Where is she? Rick asks, where was she today? and she says she doesn’t know. How did she get here? Rick tells her, come with him, and she asks, why? She says she doesn’t know what’s going on, and asks what happened to her? He says she doesn’t know? and helps her up. He steers her to the door, and she asks why they’re leaving. She calls to Brad, who doesn’t even react, and Rick tells Brad and Marcie to meet him at the station. He takes Alex out.

After they leave, Marcie freaks, but Brad says, be cool.

Esperanza paces, which has been her natural state lately. She hears over the radio, 187 on a female (187 is dead, for those who aren’t familiar with the lingo), and Lushion tells the officers to go outside. Esperanza asks if it was Mica, and Lushion says they don’t know. She says she wants to hear, but he says he’ll ask outside. She tells him to hurry, and as the officers leave, Eddie walks in, and I gasp. I’ve done that a lot during this episode. Esperanza pushes everyone back. Eddie is crying, and she says, son of a bitch. Did he see her? He nods, and cries some more, and she asks, what happened? He says, that son of a bitch; he did it. She says, that’s right. Eddie never does anything wrong. Eddie says, Larry did this, but she says, no. Eddie did this. He says he didn’t come there for this craziness, and she says, he’s crazy. And he’s going to take responsibility for what he did. She’s going to make him do it. He says it’s her fault. She made their daughter crazy. Esperanza calmly takes a gun out of a drawer in the coffee table, and shoots the sh*t out of Eddie. He slumps against the front door. I’m like, whoa. At least that’s done. Lushion tells Esperanza, put the gun down. Eddie looks at her one more time, and breathes his last. Esperanza cries.

🙋🏽‍♀️ A Note Of Farewell…

This sucks in the most humongous way. I love Tyler Perry, and I loved this show. Some of the plots may have seemed silly, but it’s soap in its truest form. The bad guys were the worst, and the good guys had blinding halos (I’m especially talking to you, Lushion), except for Brad, who’s halo got decidedly tarnished at the end. I’m not sure what happened to him, but I wasn’t thrilled with how he nearly pinned Randal’s killing on Bennett, and then pinned it on Alex. Although we won’t speak of how neither of them had a speck of blood on them.

I’ll never forget the moment I fell in love with ILYIW. Alex had just had the baby – who never even got a name, poor thing – and all the women were looking into the nursery. The baby was obviously Black, and Natalie said, so who’s going to tell Brad? In perfect soap timing, Brad had come in, and said, tell me what? For those who love soap, we’ve seen variations on that scene play out a million times. It gave the show the official soap stamp of approval.

While often called nighttime drama, I like to call a soap a soap, and Tyler evoked the vibe of the nighttime soap’s heyday, the 80s days of Dynasty and Dallas. I don’t know if it’s the type of film he uses, the way it’s written and directed, or a combination of things, but I was hooked on The Haves and the Have Nots right away, as well as If Loving You Is Wrong when it followed. I’m not even sure why I started watching them, although I probably saw an ad while watching OWN. It’s been time well spent. Only half-joking. The writing is awesome, and many scenes make me feel like I’m watching a play, they’re so tight. And I get the feeling the actors are allowed a little freedom. The casts are top-notch too.

Why this show isn’t making a return appearance, I have no idea, but my feelings tonight are conflicted. While I was thrilled to see both Randal and Eddie get what was coming to them – and by exactly the right people – too much was left unsaid. Like WTF Brad? How is Alex being arrested going to play out? Will Ian make it? Now what happens to Esperanza? It wasn’t like Eddie was being aggressive. And who will Kelly end up with? Tyrell, Rick, someone completely different, or will she take a breather and enjoy being single? What about Tanya? Did Brad and Marcie ride off into the sunset? Who the blip is Casey? Way too many unanswered questions. They should have at least given this a two-hour finale.

I’m going to miss this show… sniff

 Heard in passing. Yesterday in Below Deck Mediterranean‘s recap, I wasn’t sure if it was Captain Sandy’s father or brother who was a cop and hunter, but when I had a rerun on in the background, I heard her say it was her stepdad. Okay. I was close.

🥇 Tyler Steps Up…

The hardest working man in show business puts his money where his mouth is.

https://www.wsbtv.com/news/local/tyler-perry-pay-funeral-rayshard-brooks/S6RCNBUM3NARFGQ4IMC2FT33DE/

🛌 And So To Bed…

It’s been a long TV night, so stay safe, stay flexible, and stay making a difference.

May 29, 2020 – The 2015 Ball Continues, GH Family, Special 90, Dodd Again, Talley Speaks, Real Ring, Scheana’s World, Getting Help, Baby Time, Doodle This, 10½ Quotes & You

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

To round out the week of Nurse’s Ball flashbacks, today’s GH was from May 5th, 2015. Elizabeth had an announcement, and while we all thought she was going to tell everyone Jake Doe was really Jason (although he was ultimately Jason’s twin), when she took the mic, she talked about Robin and Stone, and Robin’s courage. She said she wished she could be that brave. After playing Phantom of the Nurse’s Ball, tiny terrorizing the event, and not impressing Emma (a scene I’d missed yesterday), Spencer’s late mother Courtney paid him an otherworldly visit. Courtney told him that making people feel badly reflected badly on him, and maybe he really felt badly about himself. She encouraged him to go to the Ball, and stop pretending that he had a hideous deformity. She got him to remove his make, and he really didn’t have much of anything.

At the Ball, Elizabeth told Nikolas she wanted the chance with Jake that she never had with Jason, and that she deserved happiness. Jake did a lot of talking to who-the-hell-is-that-guy? and Spinelli sang Stephen Bishop’s It Might Be You, which was my wedding song. Mixed emotions there – ha-ha. Who-the-hell-is-that-guy? #2 talked to Duke about taking Jordan out, and I don’t mean on a date. Felix presented Lucy with flowers, and the show ended with Sabrina and Epiphany singing You’re Not Alone, and everyone joining hands on stage.

I have no clue what the deal is for next week, or whether they’re going to continue the 2015 Ball, which has another episode. The digital guide isn’t showing any episodes as new, so we’ll see.

🏡 It All Comes Down To Family…

There’s a new GH promo in town.

https://www.soapsindepth.com/posts/general-hospital/watch-general-hospitals-powerful-new-promo

🍼 90 Day Fiancé: What Now? Lauran and Alexi’s Baby Special airs Monday, June 1st at 10 pm. I think these two are going to make fabulous parents.

🤷🏻‍♂️ She’s Just Misunderstood…

When you have to explain what you meant every time you say something, maybe you should learn new words.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/26/kelly-dodd-says-no-one-is-dying-of-coronavirus-in-orange-county/

👠 He Saw, He Vogued, He Conquered…

I’m feeling so bad about my dog, I actually paid full price for the Nook version of The Chiffon Trenches. It’s okay, but not as good as the Bette Davis bio I just finished. Still, both of them had their heartaches.

https://guestofaguest.com/new-york/fashion/andre-leon-talley-is-spilling-major-tea-about-his-friendship-with-anna-wintour

https://guestofaguest.com/new-york/fashion/graydon-carter-interview-with-andre-leon-talley-after-that-anna-wintour-drama

👘 The Story Behind the Story…

The Japanese version is almost always better.

https://www.ihorror.com/the-real-japanese-story-that-helped-inspire-the-ring/

👙 Oh Scheana, My Scheana…

If she thinks she’s not being promoted, I’d like to know what the endless flashbacks of Good As Gold, and having to watch her new crappy music video (aka, the closest she’s ever going to get to Brett again) was about. And besides, she should know LVP can do no wrong.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/28/scheana-shay-says-she-begged-lisa-vanderpump-for-help-over-vanderpump-rules-edit/

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/27/scheana-shay-felt-vindicated-and-frustrated-after-editor-revealed-vendetta-against-vanderpump-rules-star/

🥼 Hopefully It Sticks…

I like Dorinda, and being a bully doesn’t suit her, or serve the show well.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/28/meet-the-doctor-who-changed-dorinda-medleys-life/

🤰🏾 The Right To Choose…

Miss Quad (Married To Medicine) has adopted.

https://www.essence.com/love/married-to-medicine-star-quad-webb-adopts-daughter/

And you can find Kandi’s advice on surrogacy here.

https://shows.cadence13.com/podcast/yes-girl

🎨 I’ll Show You Mine…

See my Google Doodle and make one of your own.

https://g.co/doodle/fmd7mxqndjkzlxsm8

🗣 Quotes of the Week

Life is problems. Living is solving problems. – Raymond E. Feist

Expectations make people miserable, so whatever yours are, lower them. You’ll definitely be happier. – Simone Elkeles (Or as Kevin James as Doug on King of Queens would say, the lower you go, the happier you’ll be.)

You don’t develop courage by being happy in your relationships every day. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. – Epicurus

Thank God for wine. – a girl on Blind Date

Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new. – Albert Einstein

There comes a point when you either embrace who and what you are, or condemn yourself to be miserable all your days. – Laurell K. Hamilton

Pain is a pesky part of being human, I’ve learned it feels like a stab wound to the heart, something I wish we could all do without, in our lives here. – C. JoyBell C.

Wow. That seems a little late. – an 11-year-old after her mother told her she’s the first Black lead in The Nutcracker

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back. – Maya Angelou

In every age, the good old days were a myth. No one ever thought they were good at the time. For every age has consisted of crises that seemed intolerable to the people who lived through them. – Brooks Atkinson

🤸🏽‍♀️ Wherever You Go, There You Are…

Not my greatest week, but we made it to another end of one, and get to do it all over again. Now that there’s been a bit of a tide turn, get out and do something different if you can. Start reclaiming your weekend. Be kind, and don’t be stupid. See you on the Deck side, and meanwhile, stay safe, stay keeping your distance socially, and please, stay rational.

May 27, 2020 – Third Day At the Ball, Gang Up in Santa Barbara, Denise’s Dilemma, Photo Reveal, OC Sorrow, New Med Ride, an Apology, Some Laughs, a Short, Virtual Exhibitions, Two Reunions, Winning & Rolling

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Today’s flashback GH brought another day of the 2014 Nurse’s Ball, from May 14th, 2014. Blackie Parrish (aka John Stamos) didn’t show, so Brad took his place. Maxie was dating that Australian dude who was a cast member for a hot minute, but starting to fall for Nathan. Yoplait was mentioned a thousand times as a sponsor, and old Nikolas was there with young Spencer, who was in love with even younger Emma. Mac brought out Mr. Marbles, who Epiphany stomped into oblivion, much to the delight of the audience, and fake Luke was thwarted from stealing Tracy’s ELQ shares by Ned. Emma and Cameron did the tango, as everyone remembered Duke and Anna the year before. Spencer interrupted their performance by introducing Player, who sang Baby, Come Back, his plea to Emma.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Kyle invited the women to a house she’d rented in Santa Barbara. Garcelle had other plans, and Denise was late, due to filming The Bold and the Beautiful, where she was playing a bitch and loving it. In delicate flower Dorit’s interview, she was upset because Kyle had told her to STFU, and she thought that kind of stuff in a friendship made it uneasy. Really? Kyle was annoyed with the couples therapy remark, since what she and Teddi did was more akin to a Yoga class. For some reason, it bothers everyone that Kyle is closer to Teddi than she is to the rest of them. I have no clue why anyone cares, much less why Dorit keeps demanding Kyle admit it. While I never hung out in a large core friends group, I can’t imagine everyone is equally close. Why is this some deceptive affront? When Teddi arrived, she said she had to go potty real quick, and I thought, that’s a woman with children. It’s really hard to take care of kids all the time, and not consistently phrase things like you’re talking to them. In Erika’s interview, she said Kyle had hurt her feelings – we flashed back to Kyle questioning whether Erika had any good friends – but she wasn’t throwing away their friendship over a bad night. However, there were only so many bad nights she was going to tolerate.

Kyle said she had great memories of her dad, who lived in Santa Barbara after her parents divorced, and thought it was one of the reasons she loved the city so much. Manager Kate welcomed them to the house, and they cruised around in some kind of vehicles that looked like golf carts, but were really double bicycles, with pedals on both the driver’s and passenger’s sides. Dorit wondered why she had to get [stuck with] the pregnant one (i.e. Teddi). When it turned into a race, Erika asked why everything had to be a contest in this group. Although I’m not a fan, it was a good point.

Before Denise’s arrival, the women dickered over confronting her, saying her objection to their adult conversation in front of the kids was hypocritical. I actually made a blech noise when I saw LisaR’s face as Denise sat down. It was that duck suck-it face Max made when they opened the cupcake shop on 2 Broke Girls, but without being intentionally funny. When they got back to their crib, Kyle wondered why no one wanted to look at the gorgeous view with her. Probably because they were too busy prepping to be mean old girls. Moron A-hole Ridiculous bitch LisaR broached the threesome subject to Denise by asking her about filming Wild Things. In her interview, Erika sarcastically said, thank God there were no children around; tender ears. God help me. If I ever see any of these cretinous wretches on the street, I’ll be going to jail. I’m not a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but it doesn’t take one to understand there’s a difference between being in an adult atmosphere and a home party where there are children present and within earshot. I had to sit on my Twitter impulse through the whole show. Denise said she didn’t think her daughters had seen the film, but in her interview, LisaR was certain they must have. Once again, she couldn’t fathom anything outside of her own experience, saying that her daughters had seen everything of hers, and read the sex manual she’d authored. She didn’t mention that her daughters, especially Amelia, don’t seem nearly as well-adjusted as Denise’s kids. Yes. I went there, since LisaR clearly has a double-standard. God forbid anyone criticizes her parenting, yet she’s very free with advice for Denise. Denise couldn’t figure out why they didn’t get it either. Sutton suggested not inviting the kids if there might be adult conversation. If I had been Denise, I’d have suggested not inviting Sutton, but Denise stayed gracious. She told Sutton, it was her home, and she’d do what she damn well pleased, but in a nicer way.

The not-close friends Kyle and Teddi rehashed everything after the others went to bed. Teddi said, even though Denise claimed she didn’t care and it was no big deal, she’d brought it up multiple times, so she did care. She told Kyle that Denise must be bringing it up to make them feel bad. Since actual facts don’t matter, neither one of them bothered noticing that while Denise did mention it privately to two people, after that, someone else brought it up every time. What is wrong with these women?

At breakfast, LisaR wanted everyone to quit pussy-footing around, and get whatever was bubbling under the surface, out in the open. Dorit brought up something from forever ago, Erika jumped on the Memory Lane bandwagon, and I fully expected the return of Puppygate. Teddi accused Dorit of dragging her into it every time Dorit had an issue with Kyle, and shading her.

Since LisaR’s real goal was to continue haranguing Denise, she told Denise that she was uncomfortable about the conversation that went down, and didn’t like how Denise shut down the threesome dialogue. LisaR said Denise was using the kids to make them feel bad. The one who says kids are off limits. Erika thought Denise was being judgy, and LisaR said she was being contradictory. Erika said Denise inferred they were bad moms, even though she was very free with her own sex talk. LisaR squeaked that Denise had to own it, and asked if Denise talked to her daughters about the hookers in Charlie’s life. In Denise’s interview, she wondered what LisaR’s agenda was, since they’d been friends for twenty years. LisaR knew how fiercely she protected the kids, and it was hurtful. LisaR told the women, there were hurt feelings, and it was good to address it. to which the response was a roomful of crickets. What really creeps me out is, they all act like it’s about honesty and making things right, but their faces tell a different story. After revealing what they deem as truth, but is really an opinion, there’s always this look of triumph, like they’ve won something. So far, the only appropriate prize would be a kick in their Spanxed rear ends.

Next time, Garcelle is honored at the Mission Gala, Denise tells Aaron about the women confronting her, Denise calls Teddi a sh*t-effing-stirrer, and Denise and Aaron leave a party early.

💋 Did She Or Didn’t She…?

I wouldn’t blame Denise if she walked and never looked back. Although I can’t say she wasn’t given fair warning last season, this gang mentality is not a good look.

https://people.com/tv/denise-richards-didnt-quit-rhobh-despite-drama-over-alleged-affair-with-brandi-glanville-source/

https://people.com/tv/rhobh-lisa-rinna-isnt-sure-denise-richards-will-attend-reunion/

👨🏼‍✈️ Erika’s Other Man…

He is pretty cute.

https://people.com/tv/erika-girardi-shares-rare-photo-of-her-police-officer-son/

🍊 Aftershock…

Jeana speaks about Matt.

https://people.com/tv/jeana-keough-opens-up-about-ex-husband-matt-keough-sudden-death-pulmonary-embolism/

The OG’s react.

https://people.com/tv/real-housewives-orange-county-stars-react-matt-keough-death/

⛴ They Got a Bigger Boat…

Looks like Captain Sandy got a new ride.

https://www.cheatsheet.com/entertainment/below-deck-med-season-5-yacht-is-the-largest-ever-on-the-series.html/?amp=1

⛵️ Jenna Jenna Sorry…

I thought love meant never having to say you’re sorry.

https://tvdeets.com/below-deck-sailing-yacht-jenna-macgillivray-apology

😆 We Could Use a Laugh…

Bodega Cat rules!

http://jack.donyc.com/p/our-favorite-new-york-quarantine-coronavirus-memes

📱 Das Fone Hell…

Actors get creative in quarantine.

https://ew.com/celebrity/helena-bonham-carter-sam-neill-quarantine-short-film/

🎨 Feed Your Inner Artistry…

Take a tour outside the virtual box.

https://www.mic.com/p/the-weirdest-most-wonderful-virtual-museums-you-can-visit-without-leaving-your-couch-22834140

⚔️ The Reunion for Below Deck Sailing Yacht will air on Monday, June 1st at 8 pm, and the Vanderpump Rules Reunion will begin with Part One on Tuesday, June 2nd at 9 pm. The Shahs Reunion? Who knows? (Yes, I’m still harping on that.)

🎱 So We’re Doomed…?

Referring to the coronavirus, according to Ben Carson, people coming together – this is the way that we will win.

🕸 Clearing the Cobwebs…

After a little over a lifetime two months in quarantine, bans are being lifted and things are starting to open up. Whether you’ll be starting over or just starting to roll again, stay safe, stay considerate, and stay believing it will all work out in the end.

May 13, 2020 – Sonny Asks What Mike Wants, Blind Defense, VanderNews, Impressing Nema, Free Happy Hour & Upcoming Freedom

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Chase is in the shower, and turns to find Willow. He asks, what about Michael? and she says she couldn’t stay away. It will always be him. They kiss, and he wakes up. Willow wakes at the Quartermaines, sees the rings on the nightstand, and remembers the wedding.

Brook says, dumb question, and asks Michael if he got any sleep. He says he did. His body must have known it had to be rested. She asks, honestly, how is he feeling? and he says, honestly, he feels ready. She says she admires him. He did what he had to do to win custody of Wiley. Now he’s married. They’re not all so lucky. He says it will happen for her, and she says, yeah? When? He says, one day when Leo is hitched, and she’s old and grey. She throws a roll at him, and says she’ll never grow grey. Willow teaches sick children, and gave up her baby to protect him from Shiloh. Not to mention that she’s sweet, kind, and drop dead gorgeous. She’s perfect for him, and a perfect stepmother for Wiley. In the end, that’s all that matters.

Ava brings Avery to see Mike, and Avery shows him her drawings. Mike recognizes himself, and Avery asks how he knew. He points to his bald head.

Olivia says she didn’t expect Carly to be in, and Carly says she didn’t expect to be there. She was sitting at home, climbing the walls, and figured she might as well make herself useful. Olivia asks if she can do anything, and Carly suggests dropping a house on Nelle. Olivia says she’s fresh out of tornados, but she can lend support. Carly asks if she has any words of wisdom on mother-in-law-hood. Olivia sees Lulu walk in with Dustin, and says, bite your tongue, exercise patience, and slap on a smile.

Robert rolls off the couch in his sleep, and wonders where he is. Laura walks in, and asks if she should be offended that he doesn’t remember. She tells him, good morning, sunshine, and he’s like, ugh.

Michael tells Brook, he and Wiley hit the jackpot with Willow. She’s everything they could hope for. Brook says, but… and he says he knows how much it’s costing her. How much she’s given up. She lost the man she loves. Brook says, that’s Chase and Sasha’s fault, not his. He says, Willow has sacrificed a lot, and thought she’d spend the rest of her life with Chase. Brook says, Chase turned out to be a giant tool, but even if he’d walked on water, Willow would still be trading up. Not because he’s loaded – although that’s a plus – but he’s an amazing guy. Speaking as a single woman, he’s smart, funny, loyal, would never cheat, and always puts family first. That’s not as important for all women though; some want stardom. She sees Willow, and says, but Willow has enough sense to appreciate him, right?

Chase scrolls through pictures of him and Willow. Mac calls, and asks if all his bones are broken. Chase says, no, and Mac asks if he stopped on the way to work to pull a cat out of a tree. Chase says, no, and Mac says, why isn’t he there in the squad room? Chase says he’ll be there in ten minutes, and jumps out of bed.

Laura gives Robert some coffee, and he asks where Doc is. She says he’s wrapping up an overnight shift at the psyche ward. Robert says she doesn’t want him in her hair, but she says, that’s all right. They have plenty of time to pick up where they left off. Robert asks where did they leave off? and she says, it’s kind of what you’d expect from two old friends with a lot of history, comradery, and chemistry. He puts his head in his hands, and she laughs. She says he showed up falling down drunk, and she managed to get him to the couch. She gave him a blanket and water, and went to bed. He says she’s a vision of true evilness, and she says she’s been called worse. She’d like him to tell her what brought him to her door in the middle of the night. Or is he going to make her guess?

Carly says she takes it Olivia isn’t a fan of Mr. Phillips. He’s Josslyn’s teacher, so that’s how she thinks of him. Olivia says it’s better than she thinks. Lulu and Dustin approach the bar, and Olivia asks if it’s a breakfast date. Lulu says Dustin gave her a ride to work; he’s meeting Brook there. They want to get a quick look at the ballroom, so they can prepare for the Nurses Ball. Dustin says he’d also like to ask Olivia about her culinary expertise, and Lulu says, Rocco needs cupcakes, and Dustin volunteered to oversee it. Carly asks if he cooks, and he says, not as well as Olivia. Rocco has a new recipe, but they feel it’s off. Olivia asks what the occasion is, and Lulu says, it’s for Take Your Dad to School Day.

Ava tells Avery to show her grandfather some of her other masterpieces. She steps into the hallway with Sonny, and he says he didn’t know she was coming by today. She says they dropped in, and hopes it’s okay. He says, Avery never needs permission to see her grandfather. How’s he been? She says, he took a while to warm up, but he’s been smiling ever since. He’s not talking too much though. Sonny says he hasn’t been talking a lot lately, and asks if Avery is scared. She says, no; Avery is fine. She’s had some experience with her mom being in Shadybrook. She’s so young, she doesn’t understand Alzheimer’s or what happened or what’s to come. Being there doesn’t make Avery sad like it might the older kids. She’s just spending time with her grandfather and loving him.

Olivia asks if Dustin is going to be there on dad school day, and Lulu says, that’s the plan. Olivia tells him to send the recipe, and she’ll get back to him. Carly asks to talk to Dustin about Josslyn’s curriculum, and they step into the hallway. Lulu asks Olivia if something is wrong, and Olivia says she could say that. Lulu has only known Dustin a year, if that. What’s going on? Is she actively trying to erase Dante from Rocco’s life?

Ava asks Sonny how Mike is doing. She takes it this is a good day. He says the good days are fewer and far between, so he’s stopped measuring the bad days, and stays in the moment. He keeps wondering if Mike is having coherent thoughts that he can’t voice, or has any thoughts at all. He just kind of rolls with it. Sometimes Mike makes a precise observation. Ava says that’s when Sonny knows his father is still in there. She owes Sonny and Mike an apology.

Laura says she can’t believe Holly is dead, and Robert says he’s been trying to put it together himself. How could someone like that – Laura says, young and full of lifebe gone; cease to exist. She says she’s sorry, and he says he’s the one who should be sorry for dragging her out of bed. She says, it’s fine, and he says they’re talking about a person she didn’t have the greatest relationship with. She says, that was a long time ago, and people who are important to her cared about Holly; him at the top of the list. Was she ill? He says, it would be easier if that was the truth. She was on a ship that went down in a storm. Laura doesn’t remember hearing about a ship sinking, and he says she won’t. It was no ordinary ship. She asks if it was with the WSB, and he says Holly was doing contract work for them. He doesn’t know the nature. Another one of Holly’s secrets.

On the phone with Anna, Mac asks where’s the rest of the folder he’s looking at? There’s nothing there. Let him know if she turns up anything. Chase runs in, and says, sorry. Mac asks if Chase needs a day off. He senses even though Chase is there, he has something to take care of. Do it for all their sakes.

Brook tells Michael, good luck at the hearing. She says they won’t need it though. One look at them, and the judge will know Wiley belongs with them. She goes upstairs, and Michael tells Willow, he’s sorry Brook put her on the spot; she has a flair for drama. Willow says, really? She hadn’t noticed. He says, it’s funny how everyone is talking them up to each other. She says, you’d think they defy gravity, and he says he already knows how incredible she is.

Carly says she knows Dustin is a nice guy, and appreciates what he’s done for Josslyn. She doesn’t think he knows how fraught the situation is, and how hard it is on Olivia that Lulu is moving on, and not leaving room in her life for Dante. He doesn’t think that’s necessarily true, and she says she’s not judging. Lulu is her cousin, and Carly knows her. Her decision to move on is the right decision. It’s full steam ahead, which is great for Lulu, but she doesn’t think Lulu understands how it affects Olivia. She knows he can’t understand, but if her daughter-in-law walked in and casually mentioned she was bringing another man to Bring Your Dad to School Day, instead of his dad, Carly would kick her to the curb with half her hair pulled out of her head. Rocco’s dad isn’t a deadbeat who walked out, but has a severe case of PTSD, so she can imagine how hard it is for Olivia.

Lulu tells Olivia, no one is trying to erase Dante; it’s what she calls making Rocco happy. Olivia says he could have been happy with Sonny or Michael or with the mailman. Lulu says, when the day rolled around, Rocco didn’t want to feel left out. He came to them, and they sat down and decided together. Dustin is going to be Rocco’s honorary uncle, and he’s going to wear a Yankees hat to represent Dante. Olivia tears up, and says she wishes Lulu would have told her what she was doing. Lulu says it’s really what Rocco wants, and she thinks they both know it’s what Dante would want too.

Robert tells Laura that he and Holly haven’t seen too much of each other in the last few years. And when they did, it wasn’t always friendly circumstances. Laura says, Holly broke Robert’s heart and ran away with a piece of it. Part of him thought he’d get it back one day, and he has to accept that’s not going to happen.

Michael says he has something to say to Willow, and she says, her too. He tells her, ladies first, but she says, no; him. He says he made a promise to do whatever it takes to get custody of Wiley. Now that they’re married, it’s important that they tell the truth. The truth is, if he was going in without her as his wife, he’d be very, very nervous, but with her, he knows he’s going to win. Maybe today, maybe tomorrow, maybe in a counter-suit six months from now. It’s not going be easy. She says, the twists and turns are constant with Nelle, and Michael says, but they will get custody of Wiley. Her turn. She says she heard what he said to Brook, and she needs him to know that she doesn’t regret this. She can’t, and never will. Now she has to get ready for court. Her first appearance as Mrs. Michael Corinthos. She has to look the part.

Ava tells Sonny, when she wanted to press charges against Mike for kidnapping, she had so much going on, but that was no excuse. It was the wrong thing to do, and she deeply regrets it. She’s sorry. He appreciates that, and appreciates her bringing their daughter to see her grandpa. She says, anytime; she means that. They go back into Mike’s room, and Avery is drawing. She says look what she and grandpa made. Ava asks if they did it together, and Avery says, grandpa told her what to do and she did it. Ava says, it’s wonderful. It’s a boy on a bike, and Ava asks who it is. Mike says, his son, and Ava asks if Mike taught his son to ride. Avery says, daddy taught her, and Ava says, the best dads do that. They need to say goodbye; she has to get Avery to school. Avery hugs Mike, and Sonny tells her to have a great time. He tells Mike, what say they put it up on the wall? Out in the hallway, Avery asks if Ava will ever forget her like grandpa forgot daddy. Ava says, even if that happens, it will be far in the future when Avery has a family of her own. Avery asks if she’ll ever forget Ava, and Ava says, just try.

Dustin thanks Olivia for the advice, and she says, anytime. Brook asks if he wants to tour the ballroom, and Dustin says give him a minute. Carly asks Brook how Michael and Willow are, and she says, calm and focused. She can’t figure out Chase; she didn’t peg him for a cheater. The worst part is, he broke Willow’s heart, and now he’s walking around with puppy dog eyes; the guy who arrested her three times. She thought he was better than that. Carly says, Brook was arrested three times? and Brook says, the most recent was yesterday. She had the audacity to call out Sasha, and accidentally bopped her on the nose. Chase gave her a ticket, and she tore it up, like any sensible person would, and he hauled her to the station. Talk about a headcase. Carly says, excuse her, and Brook wonders if it was something she said.

Olivia says Lulu can’t get into Dante’s head, and doesn’t know what he’d want. Lulu says, maybe not the Dante he is today, but she has no doubt the Dante she knew before everything happened would want his son to feel safe with a man as good and kind as Dustin. She thanks Dustin for the ride, and leaves.

Sonny says he got Mike something. It was Jason’s idea. He puts earbuds on Mike, and says, it’s all his favorites; Bobby Darin, Paul Anka, Frankie Avalon, The Platters. He knows Mike hated his taste in music, and said he didn’t know about the classics, but he always knew when Mike was around. When he came home, his mom would put the Platters on. Sonny turns on the iPod, and Mike says, it’s loud. Sonny takes the earbuds off, and says, sorry. They’ll do this another time. Maybe one night when Avery comes to visit. What does he think of Sonny’s little girl? Mike laughs, and Sonny says he’s got to ask something. He needs to know what Mike wants, because next time he asks, Mike might not be able to say. Does he want help? Does he want to stay? Mike looks dreamy, and Sonny says, or does he want to go? The doctor pops in, and asks to speak to Sonny. Sonny tells Mike that he’ll be right back.

Chase tells Mac that he doesn’t need time off, but Mac says his record suggests otherwise. He’s arrested Brook three times. Chase says she was combative and belligerent, and Mac says, she’s a Quartermaine. They’re born that way. Chase asks if they’re supposed to get special treatment, and Mac tells him, get some perspective. Three times in three months? The review board might see it as abuse of power.

Laura tells Robert, she doesn’t mince words. Isn’t that why he came there. He says he drank too much, and gave the wrong address to Ride Share. She says, if he didn’t want it straight, he wouldn’t have come to her. He needs to grieve Holly, and say goodbye. She hugs him.

Dustin tells Olivia, he can’t imagine how difficult the situation is for her, and he doesn’t want to be an impediment to her relationship with Lulu and Rocco. He doesn’t want to take Dante’s place. She respects his willingness to put himself on the line. He says, it’s a strange position to find himself in, and she says, it’s just the way it is.

Lulu visits Laura, and says, sorry to just show up. Laura says, Lulu is her daughter. She can show up whenever she wants. Lulu says she needs advice. She thinks she just blew her relationship with Rocco’s other grandmother.

Sonny asks the doctor if a feeding tube will hurt his dad, and the doctor says they’ll provide pain medication, and keep Mike as comfortable as possible. The greater challenge is, it might further disorient him. He’s stopped eating, and without a tube, they can’t supply proper nutrition. Sonny asks what he recommends, and the doctor says, some patients make provision for life extending measures, but Mike left the decision up to Sonny. Sonny says he needs time to think, and the doctor says, of course (🍷). Michael arrives, and Sonny says he thought Michael was at court. Michael says he had time to see grandpa and tell him that he got married. Does Sonny want to talk? Sonny says they’ll do it after. They want to keep his dad alive with a feeding tube, and he doesn’t know if it’s what Mike would want, or would he want to let go? Michael says if Sonny can, he should ask Mike, and Sonny says, what if he can’t? Michael says, Sonny knows what his dad would want more than anyone, and Mike trusts that. Sonny says, selfishly, he’s not ready for Mike to go, and to be honest, he doesn’t think Mike is ready. It’s easy to say, but what if Mike wants to stick around and see his granddaughter, and see Michael and Wiley? What if he doesn’t want to die?

Robert goes into the station, and Mac asks if he’s wearing the same clothes that he had on yesterday. Robert says he is, and Mac says, interrogation room, now. They go into the room, and Mac says, what happened? He put Robert in a cab. Robert believes he washed up on Laura’s couch. Mac says, the mayor? and Robert says he felt like doing work to get his mind off of things. Mac says Robert isn’t working; take the day off. And take this with him. He hands Robert a folder, and Robert asks what it is. Mac says, a heavily redacted report from the WSB on Holly’s death. Robert asks why it’s so redacted, and Mac says, read it and see.

Willow comes into the station, and stands in front of Chase’s desk.

Robert says, it’s all black; there’s nothing here. Mac says, look closer, and see what he and Anna did. Robert says he has a screaming headache, and Mac says, there’s more to Holly’s death than what’s there. He and Anna aren’t convinced the ship accidentally went down.

Carly tells Brook, Olivia is Dante’s mother, and mothers don’t move on the same way. Sadly for Olivia, she might be waiting for Dante to come home for the rest of her life, and she’ll have to accept it

Olivia thanks Dustin, and he says he appreciates it. She says she’s not going to pretend it’s easy, but she’s happy Lulu found someone like him; a decent person. He thanks her, and says, it means a lot. She says, just so she’s clear, Dante is her son, and she’ll never give up on him. She’ll never stop hoping and praying, and doing everything in her power to bring him home. Dustin says they want the same things. Brook comes by, and says, shall we? She asks if Dustin needs a drink, but he says, it’s not even noon. She says, he knows what they say; it’s 5 o’clock somewhere.

Michael asks Sonny how long Mike hasn’t been eating, and Sonny says, a few days. It’s not like he’s starving himself on purpose. It’s almost like he’s forgotten how to eat. When Mike was with Avery, he was so happy. Sonny could see it. Sometimes he thinks it would be easier for him to let it be over, but it’s not what he wants. It’s what his dad wants. With Avery, Mike had a moment; more than a moment, a connection. If keeping him alive – Sonny cries a little – if keeping him alive five more months will give him five more of those moments, who is he to say Mike can’t have that?

Chase asks what Willow is doing there, and she says, it’s probably not the place, but she has something to tell him that can’t wait. She and Michael got married last night. She didn’t want him to hear it from anyone else. He asks, why? and she says she thought it would hurt less coming from her. He asks if it matters to her what he thinks, and she says, it always will. Goodbye. He calls her back, and says, good luck in court today. She thanks him, and walks out. Carly walks in, and looks at Chase.

Tomorrow, Robert tells Anna that he wants to prove Holly was murdered, Valentin tells Martin that he’s closer than the Quartermaines realize, Chase asks why Carly is there, and Maxie says someone has five minutes to get there.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

The bickering continued at Denise’s dinner party. Sutton tried to explain to Dorit, that her saying she had a life resonated with Kyle. Since trying to explain anything to Dorit is like explaining something to a hamster, Dorit insisted she didn’t say it that way. She did. Kyle said it was offensive, and then made the mistake of informing Dorit that other people had lives, or as Garcelle put it in her interview, everybody has stuff. LisaR compounded things by saying that Kyle blindly supported others, but Kyle said, even when it was her sister Kim, she’d supported LisaR. LisaR said that wasn’t always the case, and cited her nasty impression of Erika Jayne at the party where she harassed Kim. This actually supported the argument that Kyle didn’t blindly give support, since it varied by the situation. Why Kyle didn’t say this was beyond me, but instead, she said, f*** you all, and removed herself from the situation. Teddi followed, which everyone else took as evidence of said blind support. In Dorit’s interview, she said, Kyle is upset; cue Teddi. In Denise’s interview, she said Kyle needed to be the center of attention and was childish. It pissed her off. While I totally agree that Kyle grabbed that crown and ran with it this season, I can’t blindly support Denise in this instance, since it was a case of the gang-up style the ladies love. Dorit reminded everyone that Kyle had called them fake-ass bitches. Teddi returned, and told them when someone was upset and crying, barraging them with questions didn’t make the situation better. Letting them recover was just common decency. LisaR insisted that talking honestly was the better choice, but with this bunch, that’s usually code for talking smack. Teddi said, when someone is upset, let them be, and LisaR said, but she wanted to fix things. Right.

Amelia had come back home, and she and sister Delilah had created a new clothing line called DNR. A launch party was planned, and LisaR horned in on the photo shoot. I think we can safely say, every single one of them wants to be the center of attention. Except maybe Denise.

Erika met Denise for coffee, and Denise said she hadn’t liked where the conversation was going at the party in front of her kids. Her oldest daughter Sami overheard them arguing over threesomes. In Denise’s interview, she said she didn’t want the kids’ friends going home and repeating what they heard. They’ve never been that house. She told Erika that she wasn’t thrilled with Kyle yelling, f*** off to everyone before she stomped away. Erika thought Kyle was under a lot of pressure when everyone came at her. In her interview, Denise said, bitch, we all have a lot going on. That’s no excuse to be an a-hole. Truth! She told Erika that she’d sent out a thank you to everyone, and Kyle was the only one who didn’t respond. Denise said Kyle must consider her one of those fake-ass bitches.

Garcelle had a birthday party for her twin boys, and in her interview, she said that kids’ parties in Beverly Hills were usually over-the-top, but her kids were fine with donuts and ice cream. Her ex-husband Mike was there, and they seem to get along quite well. In Garcelle’s interview, she said, after the divorce, she put things together quickly to co-parent, so the kids weren’t damaged. They didn’t see the ugly side of divorce. She told Mike that the kids were getting older, and it was freaking her out.

The women made plans to have cocktails at Erika’s pied-à-terre, go to the DNR launch, and then go out to dinner. Kyle didn’t want to be piled on again, but decided to suck it up and go. LisaR’s mom Lois, who is probably the only one who isn’t a fake-ass bitch, along with Denise, joined them. LisaR sort of apologized to Kyle, and Kyle insisted she didn’t blindly defend people, citing the example of standing up for Dorit at the expense of her friendship with LVP. She said she defended what was right. LisaR said Kyle was there when it matters, In Kyle’s interview, she said she thought LisaR’s apology was genuine, but also motivated by wanting them at her daughters’ event. LisaR said the event was going to be a collaboration, and they’d see when they got there. Sutton was concerned the collab was with LisaR’s makeup artist, who she had issues with. When they got there, she made the huge mistake of telling Dorit that she might freak out, which caused Dorit to be concerned about what Sutton might do. Like Sutton has a reputation for tossing wine glasses at people. I’m talking to you, LisaR.

LisaR hoped her daughters inherited her hustling gene. In her interview, she said she thought they’d gotten Harry’s intelligence and her hustle. They’d hit the gene lottery. The collaboration turned out to be with The Fat Jewish, and Sutton breathed a sigh of relief. Sutton explained in her interview, that she’d been worried it was with Joey Maalouf, at one time a mutual friend of hers and LisaR’s. He and Sutton went into business together, and apparently there had been some problems, which Sutton didn’t go into details about. She said the business survived, but she and Joey had a falling out. Kyle explained she had left Denise’s party because she wasn’t having a good time in that moment. In Denise’s interview, she said she loved Kyle’s half-assed apology, and Kyle only cares about what Kyle has to say.

At dinner, Dorit said she was uncomfortable when Sutton said she might freak out, since she didn’t know what that meant. Sutton said it meant she’d start to cry and want to go home, and explained how she thought it was a collab with the makeup artist. Somehow, this stupidly turned into LisaR claiming this was an attack on her kids, even though it had nothing to do with them. LisaR said if Sutton had caused a commotion, she would have thrown her out immediately. Sutton was taken aback, and in her interview, she said she’d never seen this aggressive side of LisaR (really?), and since LisaR had put her in this lion’s den, shouldn’t she be throwing Sutton a sword? Dorit acted like a complete a-hole, finally making Sutton cry, and LisaR kept saying, don’t come for her kids. Sutton told Dorit, she’d had her fun; let the mouse go. Kyle said Sutton didn’t have any bad intentions, and Dorit took this opportunity to remind everyone again that Kyle had said they were fake-ass bitches, and demanded an example. Kyle said it was like when Dorit got all glammed up for the retreat, and added how Denise acted all down-to-earth, yet dared to have an ice sculpture at her party. Dorit said Teddi hadn’t been very glam the first season, but changed her look for season two, and told Kyle that it was a double-standard. Denise tried to talk to Kyle, who (no surprise) wouldn’t let her finish a sentence. Denise said Kyle talked at them and not to them, and doesn’t listen. In her interview, Erika wondered where Miss Laid Back was, since I guess if you’re laid back, you can’t have feelings. Lois chimed in, saying they were going to look back on this, and think it was crazy. Then they’d wake up and be 81. LisaR said Lois was 91, and told her, don’t be a fake-ass bitch.

Next time, the women meet with an astrologer, and once again, Kyle wants to be the center of attention.

🍸 Behind the VanderScenes…

I still can’t imagine Scheana is the brightest bulb in the box.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/11/vanderpump-rules-editor-admits-having-a-vendetta-against-scheana-shay-in-now-deleted-podcast/

Still, she has her supporters.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/12/scheana-shay-grateful-for-support-after-bri-dellinger-cops-to-embarrassing-vanderpump-rules-edits/

On the flip side, our heroes.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/12/bri-dellinger-says-bravo-wanted-to-make-stassi-schroeder-and-beau-clark-special-heroes/

👑 Didn’t See This One Coming…

When potential Shahs and royals mix.

https://people.com/royals/meghan-markle-learned-farsi-nema-vand-shahs-of-sunset/

📺 Free For You…

If you can stream it, you can sling it for free.

https://www.bhg.com/syndication/sling-tv-happy-hour-free-live-tv/

🦅 Moving Toward Freedom…

Little by little, things are opening. So stay smart, stay helpful, and stay on the bright side.

May 12, 2020 – Nelle Discovers a Secret, Jax Has a Sprained Brain, Alex Goes Home & Late Or Early

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Brook tells Julian, as long as he does the occasional favor, she won’t have to tell Sonny. He helped Brad pass off a stolen baby as Willow’s. When Brad got squirmy, he tried to shut Brad up by sabotaging his car, and Lucas woke up in a coma. He shouldn’t complain, but be grateful it’s not someone worse than her. Nelle listens from the hallway.

Michael and Willow go to the MetroCourt, and Carly says she thought they’d be with Diane, prepping for tomorrow. Michael says, they did, and dropped by for a toast. Sonny asks what they’re toasting to, and he says Willow agreed to marry him. Carly says, that’s wonderful news, and welcomes Willow to the family. Michael says they agreed it was the best thing for Wiley, and Carly thinks it’s the best thing for all three of them. Sonny asks when it’s happening, and Michael says, tonight he hopes. He’s filing a flight plan. Sonny says he needs to talk with his son.

Lucy tells Sasha to leave the bag of ice on her nose. They need her beautiful face to be camera ready for the photo shoot tomorrow. The photographer was expensive, and he’s already booked and paid for. Sasha says her cheeks are numb, and Lucy says, they’ll thaw. She hates that she agreed to a non-airbrush campaign, and is going to sue Brook if they have to reschedule. Sasha says she’ll be fine. Lucy says she seems grumpy, and Sasha says she’s getting frostbite. Lucy tells her, take a deep breath. She’s been there, and understands what it’s like to be labeled the town tramp.

On the phone, Ned tells Tracy, he’s trying to salvage the Med Tech deal… He fully intends to continue on as CEO, but he can’t force Michael out of the company. Monica comes in, and asks if he minds telling her what’s going on.

Portia asks if Trina is feeling better. Trina says, a little bit, but because Portia is a great mom, not because she despises Jordan any less. Portia says, Jordan isn’t the bad guy, and Trina says, she knows Jordan isn’t. He is. Cyrus is walking toward them, and Trina jumps up and strides over to him. She says she knows who he is; Cyrus Renault. He says, Trina. He’s sorry to hear her father is dead. Trina says he doesn’t sound like someone who’s sorry. He sounds like someone who needs to be stopped. Curtis and Jordan arrive, and Curtis tells Cyrus, back off. Stay the hell away from Trina. Cyrus says he doesn’t believe they’ve been introduced, and Curtis says Cyrus knows good and well who he is; he’s Jordan’s husband. Cyrus introduces himself, and Curtis says he knows everything about Cyrus. Play his game somewhere else, and stay the hell away from Trina and Portia. Cyrus says, for the record, the young lady came over to him. He saw no harm in offering his condolences. Curtis asks if he wants to talk about harm, and Jordan says since Cyrus is there, there are some things they need to discuss. They step away, and Curtis asks if Trina is okay. She asks why he’s butting in now when he left her father to die in the warehouse.

Monica wonders why she has a missed call from the PCPD, and Ned says, it must have been Brook. Monica asks if Brook has been arrested again, and Ned says, yeah; disturbing the peace. She reached out to him, but he refused to rescue her. She tells him, be careful. Tough love can have unintentional consequences. Look at his mother and Edward. He says, it’s not that bad, and she says, not yet. What if he makes Brook fend for herself, and it makes the situation worse?

Sasha asks Lucy if she’s being labeled as the town tramp. Lucy says, no… well… Who cares what people think? People cheat on their partners all the time. She tells Sasha to put the ice back on, and Sasha tells her, stop. Lucy says, it looks better. One more minute. Please? For her? She tells Sasha that she’s there for her. She completely understands when a good person find themselves cheating on their partner. It takes time. She hurt Doc terribly a while back, and didn’t think he’d ever forgive her, but now they’re friends, and he’s happy with Laura, while she’s a successful entrepreneur. All’s well that ends well.

At The Floating Rib, Martin mumbles that Nelle is trying his patience. Where is the little nutcase?

Brook thanks Julian for the drink, and asks if he’ll take her home. He says he’s had enough for one night; take a Ride Share. His phone rings, and he says, hi, Olivia. He asks what Leo is doing with his mom’s phone. He tells Leo, calm down… Ned did what?… Where’s his mom? He says he’ll be right there; hang tight. He tells Brook, it looks like she’s getting a ride after all. He couldn’t understand Leo; he was so upset. Ned did or said something. Brook says, Ned would never hurt Leo, and Julian says, he’d better not have. They leave, and Nelle comes out. She calls Martin, and asks where he is. He says he’s at The Floating Rib, where they agreed to meet a half hour ago. She says she got held up, and he says he’s charging for his time and his dinner. She says, no problem. She’s on her way now. He says he hopes whatever kept her was worth it, and she tells him, she can’t say at the moment, but she has the feeling it could prove useful.

Carly says Willow is going to be part of the family. She can’t tell Willow how grateful she is that she agreed. Willow is a strong woman, and she admires that. She knows Willow isn’t Wiley’s birth mother, but she’s shown herself to be every bit his mother by her actions. She loves Wiley, and puts him first. She couldn’t pick a better person, but is this what Willow wants? She knows Willow was with Chase, and loves him. Willow flashes back to Chase saying he loves her, and loves being with her. He thinks it’s turning into something special, and instead of looking for all the ways it could go wrong, the should look for all the ways it can go right. He’d love it if she’d move in with him. Carly asks if she’ll be able let that go.

Sonny tells Michael, Willow is a courageous young woman. He’ll always be grateful for what she did for Kristina, but is Michael sure he wants to marry her? Michael says, completely. He knows how manipulative Nelle can be, and he’s taking no chances on losing Wiley. He wants to make the strongest case possible, and Willow will be the perfect stepmother. He knows Wiley loves her. Sonny says the marriage is going to last beyond the court date. Is Michael willing to live in a loveless marriage? Michael says love hasn’t worked out for him before. He and Willow respect each other, and have been friends for a while. He likes and trusts her, and they both love Wiley. Sonny asks if Michael thinks it’s enough, and Michael says he’s doing what he has to for his son.

Cyrus says Jordan’s husband is very protective. She says, that’s Curtis, but she doesn’t need anyone to protect her. He says she’ll get no argument from him. He remembers how capable and good she is at her job. He’s always admired her efficiency. He can’t thank her enough for seeing that justice was served and exonerated, even if it was detained. She says he doesn’t have to put on an act; there’s no one else there. He says, it’s just them, and he looks forward to her acting on his behalf, especially now that he’s a resident of the community she’s sworn to serve.

Portia tells Trina, maybe it’s easier to blame Curtis, but he didn’t kidnap her, or lure her father to the warehouse. Trina says Curtis left her father in the warehouse with four guys who had guns. Portia says her father instructed Curtis to get her to a safe place, and she’s grateful he did. Trina says, she’s not.

Sonny says he wants love and passion for Michael. Not somebody who’s just trustworthy, but someone who’s compatible. Michael says, Willow is making a sacrifice too, but they agreed that Wiley was the most important thing. Beyond Nelle, they can give Wiley stability, and a happy home, with parents who respect each other. He’s taking it as a win. Sonny says, okay, and they go back to the bar. Sonny says, so they’re doing this tonight? and Michael says he has the ELQ jet ready to go to Vegas. Sonny says, not Vegas. He wants Michael to get married in Port Charles surrounded by the people he loves. Michael says he doesn’t have time to get a license, but Sonny says, no problem. He’ll make some calls, and get one. Michael shrugs, and looks at Willow.

Monica tells Ned not to let her run him out if he has more work to do. He says he was going over the next quarter’s projections, and he’s ready to pack it in. She says she can’t thank him enough for stepping in while Michael looks after Wiley. He says, family looks after family; it’s the Quartermaine way. Brook comes in with Julian, and Ned asks what she’s doing home. And why is she with Julian? Julian asks where Leo is, and Ned says, he’s asleep. Julian says, he just called; where’s Olivia? Monica says, Olivia is sleeping. She had a migraine, so Monica gave her something to knock her out. Julian says, Leo was very upset. What did Ned do? Ned says, nothing, but Julian says he was sobbing, and mentioned Ned. Ned says Leo is playing Julian. He told Leo that he couldn’t have a pet snake. He’s been obsessed ever since Violet’s birthday party. Olivia said it was out of the question. Julian asks if Ned minds if he goes upstairs to have a chat with Leo, and Ned says, of course (🍷) not. Julian and Monica go upstairs, and Brook says she told Julian that Ned would never hurt Leo. Ned says, never mind that. What the hell is she doing with Julian?

Nelle joins Martin, who says, excellent. Just in time for the bill. What does she want to talk to him about? She says, strategy. She sees Sasha, and goes over to her. She asks if it was Willow. It looks like it hurts. Sasha says, get out of her face, and Nelle asks if Sasha is going to throw a drink on her like the friend she betrayed. Poor Willow can’t catch a break.

Jordan tells Cyrus, he’s right about one thing. She serves all the people in Port Charles. He tells her, have a lovely evening. He’s sure their paths will cross again soon. He walks away.

Trina tells Portia, Curtis could have gone back in to help her dad. She begged him to, and he refused. Now his wife is trashing her dad’s reputation with a lie. Portia says, as much as they wish it wasn’t true, her father and the other men crossed a line. Curtis joins them, and says Jordan didn’t want to expose Taggert, since she knew what motivated him. Jordan comes up behind him, and Curtis says, Cyrus is a dangerous man; steer clear of him. Trina says he’s just covering for Jordan. She’s the reason Cyrus is free in the first place. They’re just as bad as Cyrus is.

Lucy tells Sasha, she’s got to go. She doesn’t want to, but she’s got to. She’s needed at the Quartermaines. Sasha ask if everything is okay. Did something happen to Michael? Lucy tells her, brace herself. Michael is going to marry Willow, and Sonny asked her to officiate. Nelle says, Michael can’t marry her, but Lucy says, yeah; he can. Michael is a Corinthos and a Quartermaine. He’s Sonny’s son, and Edward’s great-grandson. He’s part of two great pillars of Port Charles. He’s also related to the Spencers, and can do whatever he wants to do with his power and money. Sasha flashes back to telling Chase that she thinks Michael will do his best to keep Wiley safe. And she thinks before Wiley’s third birthday, maybe sooner, Willow will be madly in love with Michael, and be the happiest woman on the face of the earth. Lucy says, it speaks highly to Michael’s character. She’s never seen him throw his weight around. It must be important this time to get what he wants. She tells Sasha, please go home and rest. She doesn’t need this aggravation. She’ll call Sasha later. Ta! Nelle stomps back to Martin’s table.

Brook says, I’m happy you’re out of jail and okay. How are you feeling? Those are the words a loving father would say. He wouldn’t hang up on her, and leave her to rot. She called Julian because he was the only one available. He asks if this is going to be a regular occurrence, being tossed in jail for disturbing the peace. She says she was defending Michael’s honor. She got into it with Sasha at the boxing gym, her glove accidently collided with Sasha’s face. She flashes back to that, and Ned asks if Sasha is going to press charges, and is it going to show up online. She says, no and no. Sasha got a bloody nose, and it would have been over, except Chase got on his high horse and wrote her a ticket for she doesn’t know what. The doorbell rings, and she says, that’s probably him to write her up again. It’s Josslyn, and she asks if Michael hasn’t called them. Ned asks if there’s a reason he should, and she says, Michael and Willow are getting married. Brook says, tonight?

Nelle tells Martin, it’s obvious what Michael is trying to do, and Martin says, if Michael chooses to marry a delightful young woman he’s known for over a year, and is devoted to Wiley, and who Wiley loves, he can’t imagine the court objecting. Nelle says they need a counter move. He needs to earn his money.

Monica comes downstairs, and asks if Michael texted Josslyn. Ned says, about the wedding? and Monica says, Michael and Willow are getting married; she couldn’t be happier. Ned says he sees the legal strategy, and Brook says he’s no expert, having been blackmailed into marriage by Kathryn Bell. Ned says, Michael is going to marry a woman he never even dated? and Josslyn says she thinks it’s great. Wiley loves Willow, and she might be good enough for Michael. Sonny, Carly, Michael, and Willow come in, and Michael says, good; they’re all there. Are they ready for a wedding?

Curtis says, Trina is right; Cyrus should be in prison, but Jordan was serving the greater good. Jordan says she’s sorry Trina is hurt, and Trina says, then tell everyone her dad is innocent. Portia tells Trina, they have a more pressing matter to discuss. Trina wanted to do battle with a dangerous criminal. Promise she’ll stay away from Cyrus. Trina says, if Portia promises to make Curtis and his wife stay away from her.

Brook congratulates Willow, and welcomes her to the family. God help her. Willow says, thanks? Brook asks if that’s what she’s wearing. She’d look gorgeous in a potato sack, but let her look in her closet for something better suited to the occasion. Josslyn asks if Monica minds if she looks around, and Monica tells her, help herself to anything she thinks she can use. Sonny says he appreciates Monica doing this, and thanks her for opening up her home, and letting Michael get married there. She says Michael is her grandson, and should be married there. She asks who’s officiating, and he says, Lucy. He couldn’t find anybody. She says, he couldn’t do better than Alan’s ex-bimbo? He says, she was the only one available on such short notice. He sees Julian, and asks what Julian is doing there. Julian says, his son lives there. Sonny? Sonny says, same. Julian says he was just leaving, and Sonny says, good. Julian tells him to give Michael and Willow his best wishes. Willow cares what happens to Wiley, and deserves be with him, not Nelle.

Martin says, Nelle has the best possible case she can. She has financial means, a house, and a job. She says Michael is a CEO and lives in a mansion. Now he’s marrying Snow White. He says he can’t prevent that any more than he can conjure up a husband for her. She says, he’s a genius, and he says they’re not getting married. She tells him, calm down; they don’t have to, and she leaves.

Michael finds Willow sitting by herself, and asks how she’s holding up. She says, just fine. She’s not the fragile flower he thinks she is. He says he knows she’s anything but fragile. He’s seen how strong she is, and how hard she can fight. He’s grateful that she’s marrying him. She tells him, stop thanking her. She loves Wiley, and when she found out he wasn’t her son, she can’t describe the loss she felt. Now Wiley will be her son again. If anyone is grateful, it’s her. He says, mutual gratitude isn’t a bad foundation for a marriage, and Willow says, it will work. He says, sorry it’s so last minute, but she says she’s not. She has no time to be nervous. He says he’s not nervous. He knows it’s right, and he’s grateful she agreed. He was hoping she would accept this ring. He takes a ring out of his pocket that looks a lot like Princess Diana’s engagement ring. She says, oh my God, and he tells her it belonged to his great-grandmother Lila. He doesn’t remember her, but he’s heard stories. She was generous and kind, and saw the good in people, but she was nobody’s fool. She never got distracted be things that didn’t matter; the infighting and bickering. She was better than his great-grandfather deserved, and she was an amazing mother. He thinks Willow would be the perfect one to wear her ring. She says, it’s beautiful, but it was his great-grandmother’s ring. Maybe someone in the family should have it. He says, she is family. Does she trust him on this? She says, yes, she trusts him, and he puts the ring on her. He says, perfect fit.

Sasha and Chase meet at the pier. He asks why she couldn’t tell him over the phone, and she says she doesn’t know why it’s hitting her so hard when it’s what they wanted. Michael and Willow are getting married tonight.

Lucy gives Sonny an envelope with the license in it, and says he certainly does have friends in influential places. The judge sends his best, and wishes Michael much success. She tells him, there’s a one-day waiting period, and he says he loves midnight weddings. Technically, it will be tomorrow when it’s over. Carly brings Wiley in, and says, look who woke up. She tried to get him to go back down, but no go. Sonny says, he can join the ceremony.

Chase asks if Sasha is sure it’s tonight, and she says Michael and Willow want to get married before the hearing. He asks how she found out, and she says she was at The Floating Rib with Lucy when she got the call. He says, it must have been tough, and she says, the hardest part was seeing Nelle, and knowing it didn’t have to happen. He asks if Nelle knows about the wedding, and Sasha says Nelle went zooming back to her lawyer. She wouldn’t put it past Nelle to bother them. Should they warn them? Chase asks, who would take a call from either of them?

Carly’s phone rings, and she tells Sasha, it’s not a good time. Sasha says, Nelle overheard Lucy at The Floating Rib. She knows Michael and Willow are getting married. Carly asks if Sasha has any idea what Nelle is going to do, and Sasha says, Nelle was talking to her lawyer, then left. She wanted to give them a heads up. Carly thanks her, and says she’ll take it from there. Nothing is getting in the way of this wedding tonight.

Jordan asks if Curtis found TJ, and he says, TJ is observing a surgery. He left a message. He wonders if Cyrus is gone, but she says, security said he hasn’t left the building yet. They see Cyrus walking around, and Curtis says, visiting hours are over. Cyrus says, that’s why he’s leaving. He asks Jordan if her son doesn’t work there. In fact, he believes TJ is working tonight. Curtis says, it’s none of his business, and Cyrus says his interests are far reaching. He wouldn’t underestimate that. He walks away.

Nelle goes to Charlie’s, but Julian yells, they’re closed. She bangs on the door like a madwoman, and Julian opens it. He asks, what’s wrong with her? They’re closed. She says, trust her. He’ll want hear what she has to say.

The wedding march begins. Willow comes down the stairs in a white lace halter gown, carrying a bouquet of roses. She and Michael join hands. Lucy says they’re gathered here to witness Michael and Willow join in the bonds of matrimony.

Chase gives Sasha a beer, and asks if she’d care to join him. She says, why not? As they drink, she asks if he knows where the phrase a far, far better thing comes from. He says he doesn’t, and she says, it’s from A Tale of Two Cities. It’s Dickens, and has a convoluted plot. Sidney is in love with a girl who’s in love with an aristocrat who looks like him. Sidney sends them off to live happily ever after, and takes the guy’s place at the guillotine. As he’s climbing the scaffold to his death, he says, it’s a far, far better thing I do than I have ever done before; and it’s a far, far better rest I go to than I have ever known. He says, at least they’re not getting their heads chopped off; so there’s that. She says, compared to Sidney, they’re getting off easy. They toast to Sidney.

Michael says his vows, and Willow follows. Everyone is all misty like this is a real love match. Michael puts the ring on Willow’s finger, and Lucy says, by the power vested in her by the state of New York, she now pronounces them husband and wife. She tells Michael he can kiss his bride. He and Willow kiss, and everyone applauds. Michael smiles at Willow, who looks a little dazed.

Tomorrow, Robert asks Laura why they don’t pick up where they left off, Avery asks if she’ll ever forget Ava, and Sonny needs to know what Mike wants.

Vanderpump Rules

The Toms go to SUR to clean the gender-neutral bathroom with toothbrushes. Lisa asks, what the hell? Is it blocked? Tom explains that it’s part of the softball deal. The loser had to clean the other’s bathroom. She asks why they’re wearing matching shirts, and Tom says, it’s the TomTom experience. She says they should have done something productive, like shave her legs. Schwartz asks if that’s still o on the table. In Schwartz’s interview, he says he’s having a moment. He can just picture it at Villa Rosa. Her dainty leg hanging over the tub; long, smooth, gentle strokes, making sure not to nick her leg. It smells like rose petals and $300 candles. Tom sticks a toothbrush in his mouth, and Lisa asks, what’s wrong with them?

In his interview, James says he’s back behind the booth. It’s like a new life, and it’s been a long time coming. He’s back, baby. Raquel says she’s so excited, and now she can tell her friends who have been asking about when he’s DJing. Schwartz and Tom come out of the bathroom, and Schwartz says they head by example. They’re not afraid to get their hands dirty. He supposes he should wash them. Brittany says, hi, pooper scoopers, and Tom tells her, last night, Jax told them they’re not invited, so they decided to have their own party then. Brittany says, that’s kind of messed up, and they don’t ever have people over. Tom says, they did last night. In Tom’s interview, he says he’s not dealing with the way Jax behaves. He’s over it. Brittany  tells them, do what they want to do. Tom wishes Jax would stop… Schwartz says, being an a-hole.

Brett and Dayna go to Hyde, another restaurant Charli works at. Dayna is excited for Brett to see her in a comedy setting. Charli asks if flannel is Brett’s thing, and he says, no, but we flash back to seeing him only in flannel shirts. Dayna says, he’s like a sexy Paul Bunion, but Charli says, is he? In Dayna’s interview, she says she likes Brett, and wants to see where it goes. They work at the same restaurant, they’re both single AF, they’re both hot, and have the same interests. Brett tells her that he talked to Max, and asked how he felt. He can tell something is there, and that’s the kind of friend he is. In Brett’s interview, he says, he asked Max about lunch, and he was cool. He asked about kissing Dayna, and Max was cool, but when he asked about having sex, he hit a wall. They’re murky waters, but he’s got a big boat. Onward, going at 55 knots. In the parking lot, Dayna says, it was a great night, and they kiss.

Brittany comes home, and tells Jax that he’s not going believe it. She saw Tom at work, and he and Ariana are having a pool party at the same time they are. Jax asks, why? and she says she doesn’t know. Maybe they got mad about him texting Max. Jax says everyone begged him to have Tom back in the wedding, and he shouldn’t have. In Jax’s interview, he says, it’s been one thing after another. Tom didn’t come to the bachelor party, and made a scene about his pastor. Now he’s throwing a pool party the same day. What’s his problem? He asks Brittany, why are they doing this? It’s time they were done with Tom and Ariana. Brittany says it makes her sad. They have a blow-up slide coming. It’s petty. Jax says, Tom has been petty his whole life. He imitates Tom saying, oh, look what Jax wrote. He tells Brittany, he’s worse than a child. Brittany says she was there, and maybe if Jax wouldn’t have rage texted… Jax says, so she’s saying it’s all his fault? She says she’s just saying if he hadn’t messaged in the first place, this wouldn’t have happened. Jax says he’s going to the gym. Brittany says, it’s the third time today, and asks if that’s where he’s really going. He says she can track him on his phone.

On Instagram, Jax says he’s taking so many classes, his wife thinks he’s leading a double life. In his interview, he says, it’s his therapy. It’s like textbook 101; when you’re angry, walk away. Shouldn’t that be anger 101? Lisa goes to TomTom, and tells the Toms they’re doing a big photo shoot for the Hollywood Reporter. They’re going to highlight all of the businesses together. Tom asks, what about having a year anniversary party after the shoot? Ken says they actually made a profit in the first year. Do they want to nearly double their money? Lisa says they’re looking at next door, and they can knock through and make it part of TomTom, or keep it separate. If it’s part of TomTom, it will be called The Garden at TomTom, but if it’s separate, it will just be The Garden. Ken says, they can invest the profit, and have 10%. Lisa says she’d like see them throw in; it’s been a great year. Schwartz says, it’s been rewarding, fulfilling, and he’s learned so much. Lisa says she’s going to cry. In Schwartz’s interview, he says, at times, the partnership was rocky. We flash back to some of that, and he says, but they made it through the first year, and turned a profit. Holy sh*t. Lisa says they need to know by Monday. Tom says he has to talk it over with Ariana, and Lisa says, that’s what he should do. Lisa and Ken leave, and Tom says, it’s decision time. Schwartz says he feels like a stud.

In his InstaStory, Jax says the women instructors are hard. They make the male instructors look like little girls. Lala visits Brittany, and says she was just texting Brittany’s hubby. Brittany says, he’s being cray-cray. Jax calls Lala, and she says she’s going to Dayna’s comedy show. He tells her not to go to Tom’s pool party. She tells him, calm down, and go workout. He says he works out so much, his wife thinks he’s messing around. What wife yells at their husband for going to the gym? Brittany says, that’s not what she did. He’s spiraling out of control, and is doing the same things he did before, and he’s going crazy on her friends. Calm down, and stop texting. She loves him. She tells Lala, he hung up. She can’t keep dealing with this crap. She’s wondering why he’s acting like this again. Lala asks if he was reactive before, and Brittany says, yes. She doesn’t want him to go back to those ways. In Brittany’s interview, she says she worked hard to forgive Jax, but even though she’s forgiven him, she hasn’t forgotten. She tells Lala that Jax is stirred up again. She’s wondering if anyone is coming, and they need a DJ. Lala asks if she should ask James, and calls him. She says Brittany and Jax are having a pool party, and she thought she’d reach out to see if he can DJ. Brittany says they thought it would be fun. James stammers a little, and says he appreciates being invited, but he already said yes to Tom. Lala says she totally gets it. When she hangs up, Brittany asks why would Tom plan something at the same time? He’s being a jerk. One person does wrong, so the other person does too. Lala says, it’s sad, and Brittany says, it’s hard to deal with when Jax is texting all of her friends.

Once again Instagramming, Jax films the outside of the gym, and says, it’s his new house, where his wife is going to divorce him because spent too much time there. Lala arrives at the comedy club, and Beau and Stassi tell her that they’ve been practicing their comedy laughs. Max shows up, followed by Brett, and Stassi says, it’s sweet. They both came to support their girlfriend. Max gives Brett a reluctant fist bump. Max asks if Brett talked to Scheana, and Brett says she just texted, asking where they’re going afterward. Stassi says, somewhere nearby, and he asks if Nighthawk is around there. A guy comes out, and does a bit using Max and Beau’s names, then introduces Dayna, who, from what little we see, isn’t bad. In Stassi’s interview, she says, Dayna has a cynical view of world that’s actually funny. Her negativity makes Stassi laugh. Dayna joins them when she’s done, and they tell her she did good. On Instagram, Jax says he has an update. His ring is back on, and his marriage is still okay. A million people keep asking, where’s his ring?

Lisa goes to the bar at SUR, and asks Ariana how she is, and if all is well. Ariana says she’s seeing a lot of the work she did over the summer come to fruition, and their book is coming out. (FYI, I got it for Christmas.) Lisa is glad to hear Ariana is doing well, and reminds her about Covenant House. Ariana says she has some clothes and cosmetic stuff. In Lisa’s interview, she says, Covenant House is a place for at risk youth that helps them transition into adulthood. She says she’ll meet Ariana there, and Ariana says, the only problem going on is the pool party thing. Lisa asks what she means, and Ariana tells her that Jax and Brittany are having a pool party. Everyone was going, and Jax started uninviting everyone. Some of them said Tom and Ariana have a pool; why not have their own pool party? Lisa says, not on the same day and time, but Ariana says, if you bully your friends for years, that’s what happens. Everybody says, screw them. What’s anyone losing by not being friends with Jax? She makes Ariana promise that when they see each other at work, it will be productive and go with a positive attitude.

Lala tells Dayna, she can finally relax; she killed her show. The group goes to Nighthawk, and Dayna thanks them for coming. Stassi says, it was a relief that Dayna was so great. She should be proud of herself. Scheana joins them, and says she could literally walk there, but she didn’t because she’s going out after this. She brings up the competing pool parties, and Lala says, that’s effed up. Scheana says she’s shooting, so she can’t go to either of them. She asks if they’re picking one or pool party hopping. Lala says she’s not going to a frat house that has no furniture, and they don’t even know if there will be food. She’ll be at Jax and Brittany’s like an adult. Scheana says, Jax texted her that she was dumb, and shouldn’t have planned to video on that day. Stassi says, for real she has to talk to him. In Stassi’s interview, she says, someone needs to say something, and she feels she’s one of the only people who can. To be frank, she thinks Jax is kind of scared of her. Lala says she heard Brett and Dayna made out. In Dayna’s interview, she says, note to self; don’t tell Lala sh*t. Lala asks, what’s the vibe? and Dayna says, there’s no vibe. Max makes fun of Dayna, and she asks if he has a problem. What did she do to him? He says she made out with his best friend. He told her how he felt. She says, he was ambiguous. We flash back to Max telling Dayna, he’s cool, but not cool. He says, she needs to control her sh*t, and Stassi says Dayna doesn’t owe Max anything. Max says he also told Brett, and Brett says he’s been honest with Max. Dayna says, they like each other and have similar interests. Brett says he respects his and Max’s friendship, and Dayna knows that. Scheana asks why they were making out, and Dayna tells her, STFU. Max thinks Brett is lying to him, and tells Brett to look him in the eye, and tell him that he doesn’t have feelings for Dayna. Brett insists he doesn’t. He’s interested in her, and they’re close, she’s someone he likes having in his life, but he doesn’t have feelings for her. I’m not sure what he calls it then. Lala says, that doesn’t even make sense (thank you). Scheana asks why they made out multiple times, and Beau says Dayna is the one feeling the most embarrassed and hurt. Stassi says, everyone has to pick a lane. Lala says, ya’ll are real messy right now, and Max tells Dayna, don’t make out with his friends. Dayna tells Max, STFU.

Back on the Gram, Jax says the male instructors must have heard him calling them girls, and took it out on him. He just had two classes that were hard as hell. At Covenant House, Lisa, Brittany, and Ariana sort the clothes. Lisa remembers when she fit in them. She asks how Brittany is, and Brittany says, it’s been a rough couple of days. Jax was rage texting, and the others got mad. They started fighting, and it trickled over. Lisa says, these are the best moments of Jax’s life; he has a new house, and just got married. Brittany says, it’s sad. Tom hurt her feelings. Everyone had to choose where to go. She feels like she tried hard. Ariana says, maybe Jax hurt their feelings. Brittany is collateral damage. Brittany says she knows, but they need to have respect for her like she does for them. In Ariana’s interview, she says she wishes Brittany could just be mad at Jax, since he created the problem. She’s married to this guy, so she married the problem. Ariana says, if not for Brittany, she doesn’t know how many friends Jax would have. Brittany thinks everyone, except for Tom, and in her interview, Ariana says, she’s not friends with Jax now.

Katie and Schwartz go to lunch, and he tells her about the one year anniversary party. It’s special night; more than she knows. They have the opportunity to parlay the initial profits into an expansion, or they can take the check, and Lisa will create a separate entity. Katie says, parlay. In Katie’s interview, she says she feels like they’ve come a long way. She feels like they’re a team. She doesn’t want to tell him what to do, but thinks he knows. He says he loves her. Katie looks at her phone, and wonders, what the hell happened? Brittany texted and said Ariana let her know that the pool party was Katie’s idea in the first place. Schwartz says, propaganda, and Katie says, she got the same story from Lala. It’s not cool. Katie calls Brittany, getting all teary. Brittany says she’s not blaming Katie. She just said it happened because of Katie. Katie says, no one is saying that. Brittany says Katie rage texts all the time, and should go easy on Jax. Schwartz says Katie took accountability, and she’s being an idiot. Katie hangs up, and says, go easy on Jax? It’s 150% his fault.

Everything is set up at Jax and Brittany’s, including the giant slide. Jax comes in, and Brittany says he looks muscular. He says, that’s what happens when you go to the gym three times a day. He’s going through crap in his head, and says things he doesn’t mean, so instead he likes to go to the gym. Brittany says Tom still hasn’t apologized, and Katie isn’t coming. Jax says, and it’s his fault. Everything he’s done, they’ve done, but the spotlight is on him. He told Brittany, do not trust these people.

Tom and Ariana get ready. Tom makes James an unleaded cocktail. Katie tells them about the text she got from Brittany, saying the pool party was all her idea, and go easy on Jax about the rage texts, since she does it too. Tom says she texts at 3 am, and isn’t manipulative. Schwartz says he’s staying out of it. People start to arrive. There’s a tent in the backyard, along with a hookah, and James in the DJ booth. Tom thanks everyone for coming, and Ariana says, let’s get wasted.

Brit cooks, while crickets chirp. A lone rubber ducky floats in the pool. Jax says they only have eight people coming, but they’re the ones he wants there. Brett, Lala, Stassi, and Beau arrive. In Charli’s interview, she says, Tom and Ariana’s pool party is lit. Who wants to be at Jax’s retirement party anyway? He’s closer to her dad’s age than hers. Katie says, Dayna has two guys, and Dayna says, and half the commitment. She still doesn’t have a whole man. Brett says Max texted him, and said he felt super bummed out and betrayed. He doesn’t want to act like it’s okay anymore. He’s staying home. Brett says he’s always been bro’s before ho’s. In Stassi’s interview, she says she doesn’t know if Brett is a poet, a philosopher, or a d-bag. Brett says all they did was make out, and it’s like World War II. Jax informs Brett hat he used to put his d*ck in anything that moved.

Dayna tells Ariana that she’s hot. Someone should screw and love her, and she’s not doing either. Katie says, that’s healthy, natural, and normal. Ariana says, there are a ton of other dudes and ladies out there. Carter thanks Ariana for having them, and Ariana asks if they’re back together. Kristen says, they’re dating. Kristen says she got a text that Stassi is making fun of their party, and Ariana says, Regina George. Stassi is a snob ass bitch. Kristen says they were making fun at Tom and Ariana not having furniture. Ariana says if she hears anyone talking sh*t about her house, she’ll clock them.

Tom asks Schwartz what he thinks about Lisa’s proposal. Schwartz says, it’s tempting to just take the check. In Tom’s interview, he says, the bigger the venture, the more potential for failure. Schwartz says he poured his heart and soul into this place, and Tom says Schwartz is his effing boy. Schwartz wants it to be this way until the day they die. James comes in, and Tom thanks him. James says it keeps him busy, and that’s a good thing to be. Tom says James has come a long way. Monday. TomTom is having its one year anniversary party. Could he possibly DJ? James says, he’d 100% love to. Tom says James being humble pie is sexy. Schwartz likes it when James is cocky too. A little part of him misses the a-hole. Katie says, WTF? James has shown a vulnerability she hasn’t seen, and didn’t think he would ever show. He’s shown growth. She wanted to rip his head off, and put it in the paper shredder. James says he’s sorry, and they hug it out. James says he hasn’t felt this good in a minute.

Stassi tells Jax, they need to talk. She feels like with what he’s doing texting people, from the outside, it looks like he’s losing his mind. He says, he is. She asks, why? and he says he doesn’t know. In his interview, he says he’s sprained his brain. When you sprain your ankle, you don’t walk on it. That’s the way the brain works. He tells Stassi, on paper, it looks like he hit the lottery, but he’s not happy. He’s not allowing himself to have a good time. Stassi says, it’s not like he’s an a-hole once a year; he’s an a-hole all the time. He says he has downtime now, and wonders if he did the right thing. What if his wife thinks he can’t make her happy? Stassi says, she is happy, and he says, it’s a lot of pressure. Stassi says, he wants to sabotage his relationship; it’s a pattern he has. Jax says, how he hurt people used to be cheating. He’d take it out on someone else. She says he has to allow the struggle, feelings, emotions, and mental health, but he has control over how he treats people. He says he’s afraid he’s going to take it out on Brittany.

Next week, the season finale, TomTom’s anniversary party, SUR’s group photo, Lisa tells Jax to take care of his wife, Max says Dayna is on a high horse, Stassi says the Witches of WeHo is done-o, and Tom tells Jax not to act like he has an effing hall pass.

If Loving You Is Wrong

Kelly gives Lushion a huge kiss, and Carl thinks that’s his cue to say goodbye. Lushion says, it’s not a cue. Carl tells Kelly that he never wants to see her under these circumstances again, and she guarantees he won’t. He says he’ll say goodbye then; awkward. Lushion says, nothing is awkward, and Kelly asks if she can go now. Carl says, yes; they’re processing her. She tells him that she’d love to have him for dinner, and he says, great. She says she’ll call him, and thanks them both again. Carl leaves, and Lushion says, what was that? Kelly says she was just happy, and he says, good. She says, he didn’t think… and he says, it was kind of personal. She says she wasn’t coming on to him; she was just happy. She’s sorry he took it the wrong way. He says they can never bring this up again, and she says she wasn’t trying to make a pass at him; she was just happy.

Lushion says, they’re clear? and Kelly says, crystal. Eddie is standing there, filming with his phone, and says he’s got it on camera, crystal clear; full HD. Lushion says, give him the damn phone, or he’ll take it. Eddie says, it looks like Lushion took lip service, and Lushion makes a grab for the phone, but Eddie keeps it out of his grasp. Eddie says, it’s going to Lushion’s wife, and Kelly suggests they tell her themselves. Eddie says, why not wait until he adds music? Kelly walks past her cell, and Eddie asks where she’s going. She says, home. Even with everything Eddie tried, she’s still going home. He asks how hell that happened, and she says wouldn’t he like to know? What the devil meant for evil, God turned into good. He says there she goes with the God stuff again. Has she ever heard of, thou shalt not kill? Enjoy her freedom. It’s the last couple days. Lushion and Kelly walk off, and Eddie calls someone, and says he has a video to edit.

Larry approaches Eddie, who asks if he sees something he likes. Larry says he just needs the $50K Eddie took from him. It’s all fun and games, but this isn’t a game. Does Eddie want to play with him? Eddie asks what Larry is referring to. He didn’t take $50K. Larry says Eddie lied to him; he’d said everything was taken care of. Eddie says he has no idea what Larry is talking about, and Larry says he expects Eddie to reimburse him within 24 hours. Eddie says, keep dreaming; that ain’t gonna happen. Larry says he’s warning Eddie, and Eddie says he’s telling Larry, dream on. Larry says Eddie took money from some very powerful people, who will have no problem giving Eddie more pain and suffering than Larry ever could. It’s his funeral. Eddie says he wants a 21 gun salute, and Larry says, duly noted. Larry calls someone to come to the office; $50K is at issue. Eddie asks if that’s supposed to make him tremble, and Larry says, it’s not rocket science. Eddie says, see him soon, and hold his breath about the $50K.

Bennet (that’s his name, right?) has come home for lunch, and compliments Tanya’s cooling. She thinks he’s just trying to make her feel better, and wonders why Randal keeps throwing things out. It’s weird, right? Bennet tells her not to worry about Randal, and she says, he’s a dork. He just stays home; what does he do? He asks why she wants to know, and she says she’s just curious. He asks if Randal is still bothering her, and she says, no. She asks if Bennet did something, and he says he has to get back to the station. He’ll be home by 5. She thanks him for having lunch with her. She says she wouldn’t blame him if he wanted to leave her. She’s been thinking about calling her parents. They said she could come home. She knows how hard it is on him. He says he doesn’t want to hear about this. He’ll be home for dinner, and if anyone comes to the door, let him know. She says, he’s not going to do anything, is he? She doesn’t want him in trouble. He knows his temper. He says he’s fine. He just wants to know.

Bennet leaves the house, and Randal asks if they can talk a second. He wants to apologize for talking to Bennet’s wife. He thinks they got off on the wrong foot, and he’s really sorry. Bennet says, okay, and Randal asks if Bennet saw anybody come in his house. It was vandalized. Bennet says he didn’t see anyone, and Randal asks if it doesn’t bother him. He told Bennet that his house was just vandalized, and he didn’t say, sorry. Bennet says he really is; it’s terrible. He asks when Randal goes to work, and Randal says, whenever he wants to; why? Bennet says he can keep an eye on Randal’s house. Randal says he’s there all the time, and Bennet says, then how did it happen? Randal says he was seeing a patient. Bennet says, Randal has patients? and Randal says he does. He can help Bennet’s wife. Bennet says they’re good. Are they doing this again? Randal just apologized. Randal asks when Bennet gets back, and Bennet says Randal doesn’t want to test him. Randal says he’s not, and Bennet says he can be a demon from hell, and will protect everything he loves. Randal asks if that’s any way for a firefighter to talk, but Bennet says he’s talking as a former marine. He drives off. Randal stands there for a moment, and goes back inside.

Alex sits at the bar. Johnny joins her, and asks, who was that guy? She says, nobody to be concerned about. Johnny says, it seemed like he knew her, and she says, he’s her neighbor. Johnny says, be sure he doesn’t come around, and Alex says, he won’t if he knows what’s good for him. She needs another drink. He says, coffee for her. She needs to sober up. She says he’s ruining this party, but he tells her that he doesn’t want her to be sick in his bed later. She says he has to understand. She’s been locked in a house playing mommy for she doesn’t know how many years. She’s so tired of it. She wants to get loose, dance, do bad karaoke, and drink. Johnny says, drink coffee. She says, that’s a mom’s drink, and he says, there are a lot of hot moms out there; drink up. He wants her to feel good.

Johnny says it looks like Alex has more company. He’ll leave that to her. Esperanza comes in with Steven, and Alex says, Esperanza wants to ride the bull, but Esperanza says, no. Alex tells Steven, it’s really fun, but he says he’s good. It’s good to see her. She says, it’s good to see him too. Wait a minute. They’re together? Steven asks what she’s drinking, and she says, anything she can get her hands on, but now she needs coffee. Steven says he’ll be at the bar. Johnny tells Steven, if he’s not drinking, he’s got to wait outside. Steven asks if Johnny is sure about that, and opens his jacket, flashing his badge. Johnny says, his apologies. Steven is good to go.

Esperanza sees Alex is drinking coffee; that’s good. Alex asks, what’s up? and Esperanza says Alex is leaving right now. Alex says she’s not going anywhere. She doesn’t want that life anymore. She needs to be free. Esperanza says Alex’s son wasn’t breathing; remember him? She shows Alex a picture on her phone, and Alex looks at it absently. Esperanza wonders if Alex isn’t going to ask how he is, and Alex asks if he’s okay. Esperanza says, he’s fine. He was just sleeping, but Marcie was at Alex’s house, and put him on his stomach. Alex says, dumb bitch, and Esperanza says, Alex is his mom. Alex says, so she’s the dumb bitch now? Esperanza says her son needs her, but Alex says, he needs Brad. Her kids deserve better than her. Esperanza wonders where this is coming from, and asks if Alex is embarrassed about the online thing. Alex says she’s not embarrassed. She doesn’t want that life anymore. How hard is it to comprendé? Esperanza says, so she’s just going to walk away from her kids, and live in a bar with a guy she doesn’t know? She doesn’t know anything about him. Alex knows he’s not Brad, and she’s ready to be a free spirit. Esperanza says she doesn’t care that Brad and Marcie are with her kids? She can explain to the kids why she’s leaving Brad. This is wrong, but at least let them know. She owes them that. Alex says, okay. She has to pack anyway. She tells Johnny that she’ll be right back. She has to pick up some things. He says he’ll be waiting for her.

Bennet goes to the police station, and tells Rick, he’d like to file a report. His neighbor is harassing his wife. He’s constantly harassing her, and going to the house when Bennet isn’t there, and knocking on the door. Rick asks if Bennet had told him to stop, and Bennet says he has, and he won’t. Rick asks his name, and Bennet says, Randal Holmes. Rick says, oh, and Bennet asks if Rick knows him. Rick says, they all know him. It’s something Randal does; it’s not the first complaint. Rick leaves to get the paperwork, and Eddie comes along. Bennet says he remembers Eddie. He’s the officer who helped with his wife. Eddie asks if he’s been keeping his bitch quiet, and Bennet says, his wife’s not a bitch. Eddie says, he’s one of those guys who still respects his woman. What’s he here for? Bennet says he’s filing a report, and Rick comes back with the paperwork. Eddie asks, on who? and Rick says Randal is harassing Bennet’s wife. Eddie says, he’s up to that again? He’ll take care of it. Rick gives Eddie the papers, and leaves. Eddie suggests Bennet skip the paperwork, and he’ll put a bullet in Randal’s head. Bennet says, this isn’t working, and Eddie says he can help out in a major way; all of Bennet’s problems will go away. Bennet says, thanks, but that’s sick. Eddie says, have it his way, and Bennet leaves. Eddie says, dumb ass, and walks away singing Swing Low, Sweet Chariot.

Carl goes to Larry’s office. Larry says he asked Carl to come to discuss things. This firm needs him. Carl says, really? and Larry asks if Carl is impressed by the firm. Carl says, it’s nice, He’s familiar with their reputation, and hears they’re incredible. Larry asks how he’d like to work there. He can start at $250K, and they charge $500 an hour. Carl is a rock star. Carl appreciates it, and Larry says he’s impressed with the Kelly Isaacs case; how did Carl do it? Carl says he’s persuasive, and Larry says, clearly. Carl says Larry represents his opponent, and he shouldn’t tell him. Larry asks, why? He wants Carl on his team, and doesn’t want to be against him. It will be their little secret. Carl says he can’t do that, and Larry asks if he’s nervous. Carl says, no, and Larry says he spoke to Carl’s law professors, and they said he was a pretty average student. Carl says, he was great, and Larry says he’ll stop the bullsh*t.  He didn’t bring Carl in to offer him a job, but he’s giving Carl a chance. Carl says, for what? and Larry says, tell him how and where he got the information. Carl says he can’t, and Larry says he can and will ruin Carl’s name. He’ll call the bar and tell them Carl made illegal charges. Carl says he didn’t do anything illegal, but Larry begs to differ. Carl says he’s leaving, and Larry says, if Carl walks out, he has no hope for a future law practice. Carl says, have a good one, and Larry says, unfortunate. Carl leaves, and Larry says, another one bites the dust.

Randal takes out a piece of garbage while Tanya is taking out her garbage. Randal says, hi, and she tells him to talk to her. He asks if she doesn’t think it’s weird they’re both out at the same time. She says, don’t talk to her, and he says, okay; he won’t. He wanders across the street, and I say, ugh, out loud. He looks in the garbage, and sees a can of spray paint. He takes it, and goes back home. He compares the color with what’s sprayed on his wall, and storms back out, leaving the can. He stomps across the street, rolling up his sleeves. I have to laugh at that, since he’s like a cartoon. Tanya says she’s going to call her husband if Randal doesn’t leave her alone. He says, so she paints. Has she seen anyone go into his house? She says, no, but he thinks she did. He stands in her doorway, and she tells him, move away or she’ll scream. He says she’s good at screaming, and she says, move. He asks, who was it? Who was good at screaming in her household? Her father, who killed her dog, or her sister? She says she doesn’t have a sister, and he says, somebody is on their meds today. She says her husband will be home soon. He doesn’t like Randal, and Randal needs to be careful of his temper. Randal asks if her husband has temper enough to break in and vandalize his house. She tells him, move away from her door, but he leans further in. He says she can’t get pregnant on her meds. She goes past him, onto the lawn, and starts screaming. Natalie sees, and runs out. Marcie looks out, and sees Randal gesturing and Tanya screaming. Natalie tells Randal to get his ass away from that woman, and he tells her to get in her own damn house. He thought they didn’t come out when they hear stuff. She tells Randal, leave that woman alone. Something bad is going to happen to him. He asks if she’s threatening him, and she says, no, but she’s praying she’ll be there when it happens. She’s calling Tanya’s husband. He’s big, and she can’t wait to see him kick Randal’s ass. Randal makes fun of her, and she grabs a huge tree branch and starts whacking him with it. He says he’ll call the police, but she says she doesn’t care, and chases him back into his house.

Natalie goes to Tanya’s house, and asks if she’s all right. Tanya says, Randal is just being his usual rude self. Natalie says, don’t let him bother her. Just grab a branch, and whack his ass out, then call her. Tanya thanks Natalie for not judging her. She knows her husband told Natalie about her condition. Natalie says he did. Just take her meds and keep going. If Tanya needs her, she’s right there.

Marcie meets Natalie outside, and asks, what about Randal? Natalie says, he was after Tanya. She asks if Marcie is watching the baby, and Marcie says, her and Brad. Natalie says, you’re not supposed to put a baby on their stomach, and Marcie says she didn’t know. Natalie asks if she’s sure, and Marcie asks what she’s saying. Natalie says Marcie knows you’re not supposed to do that, but Marcie insists she didn’t know. She would never hurt the baby; he’s beautiful. Natalie tells her, call if she needs anything. Marcie asks if Natalie thinks Alex isn’t coming back, but Natalie doesn’t know.

Marcie goes back in the house, and Brad comes downstairs. He asks if he heard screaming (note to self: never rely on Brad in an emergency), and Marcie says, it was the neighbor across the street. He asks if she’s okay, and Marcie says, Randal was harassing her. He asks if he should check on her, but she says Natalie already did. Alex rolls in, with Esperanza and Steven, and Brad asks where she’s been. She says she’s here to get her stuff, and Esperanza says, and talk to the kids. Alex repeats, and talk to her kids. Brad asks if she’s drunk; she smells like alcohol. Alex says, alcohol, and probably sex. She’s sure they understand. Back the hell up then, and she’ll be gone in a minute. Brad says, fine. He’s taking the house. She says, fine with her. He can have this boring, piece of sh*t, cookie-cutter bullsh*t. He says he’s taking full custody of the kids, and she says, thank you. It’s perfect for all of them. She heads for the liquor cabinet, telling Steven, excuse me, sir. Steven grabs her before she can grab the liquor. Brad says the kids can’t see her like this. She needs to clean herself up. Alex says Brad needs to back off. She starts to go upstairs, but Brad stops her. She says she tried, and flounces out the door. Esperanza tries to catch her, but she’s halfway down the block, and says, I’m out, bitches. She strides down the street. Esperanza tells Steven, she needs to come to her senses, but he says there’s nothing they can do for her. Alex bangs on Randal’s door, and he says, what the hell? She tells him that she needs a drink, and walks past him into the house. Everyone is like, what?

Steven tells Esperanza that Alex will be fine, and steers her back to the car. Randal asks Alex, what the hell is wrong with her? and she asks where the booze is. She finds some, and asks, what the hell happened in here? She laughs, and he says, get the hell out. She says let her finish her drink. She drains the glass, and he says, get the hell out of his house. She says, gladly, and unzips his pants. He says, get the hell… out of… his house…

While Natalie is cleaning up, Eddie walks into her house. She grabs a knife, and says, did he just walk in the door? He says, it was unlocked, and she asks if he’s lost his mind. He says, a while ago. She asks what makes him think he can walk into somebody’s house, and he says, white MF’ing privilege. He can do what he wants. She tells him, get the hell out of her house right now. He says the last time she came at him with a knife, he tazed her ass. He shows her the screen on his phone, and says, look.

Next time, Ian tells Larry that he’s trying to protect the firm, Eddie asks Randal what’s wrong with him, and Eddie tells Natalie to check on what’s going on.

🌇 Later Than Late…

Since I have to get some of that pesky sleep, see you at the same time tomorrow, but earlier. Meanwhile, stay busy, stay active, but don’t stay around too many people yet.

May 8, 2020 – Which Way Did They Go, Today’s GH, Get Well Soon, Tyler’s Royals, Happy 10th, Hello Elijah, Golden Girl, Chef Spat, BH Dish, Nosy Husband, No Charm, Virtual Andy, Quotes of Eight & Could Be Worse

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

Shahs of Sunset

Your guess is as good as mine as to what happened here. Part one of the Reunion was supposed to air at 9 pm, but somehow it turned into The Notebook. I checked everywhere – Bravo’s site, Twitter, Facebook, Google – nothing. I saw the question being posed on the Shahs Facebook page, but no one answered. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I even checked through the entire next week of the digital guide, and nada. Is there a lawsuit pending? As soon as I find out what the blip is going on, I’ll let you know.

It was probably just as well, since I have a sick child dog who had to stay at the hospital tonight, and I’m just a wee bit distracted. I poured an entire pot of tea though, for your entertainment pleasure.

Casey-December14-2013 (3)

My Little Man

🏥 Today, General Hospital’s Flashback Friday was the episode where Jordan and Curtis got married on The Haunted Star. Then found Kiki’s body in their wedding night stateroom. And they still haven’t gone on their honeymoon.

🤕 At Least He Didn’t Lose His Head This Time…

I love Joey Pants! Wishing him a smooth recovery.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/03/sopranos-star-joey-pantoliano-suffers-severe-head-injury-after-being-hit-by-car/

👑 Two Degrees Of Royalty…

Along with Josh Altman giving his two cents.

https://pagesix.com/2020/05/07/meghan-markle-and-prince-harry-move-into-18m-mansion-owned-by-tyler-perry/

👒 I Can See the Resemblance…

But does she still have that nutcracker?

https://www.eonline.com/news/1149932/bethenny-frankel-shares-extremely-rare-photo-of-daughter-bryn-on-her-10th-birthday

🏝 Hawaiian (Re)Hash…

No earth shattering revelations.

https://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/shahs-of-sunset-producers-spill-what-really-happened-on-the-hawaii-trip?cid=soc_tw_Bravo_Dish

👶🏽 A Distant Meeting…

GG’s baby Elijah makes his quarantine debut with the cast.

https://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/gg-gharachedaghi-welcomes-son-shahs-of-sunset-cast-meets-him?cid=soc_fb_Shahs_Dish&fbclid=IwAR258tFYy6XkbJytZ7ripnVPVYd6VL95ZJ3nFjWn8ilITie93xKQA21DpW0

And takes a stroll(er).

https://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/golnesa-gg-gharachedaghi-baby-elijah-first-outing?cid=soc_fb_Shahs_Dish&fbclid=IwAR2PJghFfFwmNopj22bIJ1Vv8TPSGK729OB9dsks-7F1-z7yxZWZGAL3cr4

💃🏽 Looking Good As Gold…

TBH, I kind of forgot about her.

https://www.bravotv.com/shahs-of-sunset/style-living/asa-soltan-rahmati-golden-goddess-in-glittering-kaftan?cid=soc_fb_Shahs_fashion&fbclid=IwAR3NWUm5NOJuW-NcAELN3zMSrhEDPt09mRhHAc_yNiliQ3e1-_Zch9Ohicc

🍽 Dinnerware Debate…

If you’re back is to the rack, you’re under attack.

https://www.bravotv.com/top-chef/season-17/episode-8/videos/picking-out-the-perfect-dinnerware?cid=soc_tw_Bravo_TopChef

💋 Joanna Explains It Not At All…

I never heard someone use so many words to say they weren’t talking about something. Note to Joanna: I can’t comment on that is sufficient.

https://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-miami/season-3/videos/yes-joanna-krupa-talked-to-pal-denise-richards-about?cid=soc_tw_Bravo_LifeAfterBravo

👉 Stay Out Of Women’s Business…

But if it’s a reality show, and the reality is, Denise’s husband wants to get involved with her issues, what’s the problem?

https://realityblurb.com/2020/05/05/rhobh-star-dorit-kemsley-claims-denise-richards-husband-aaron-got-too-involved-during-season-10-reveals-lisa-vanderpump-refused-to-make-amends-with-cast-and-says-pk-keeps-his-distance-from-the/

https://realityblurb.com/2020/04/08/rhobh-star-erika-jayne-reveals-the-real-reason-for-her-feud-with-denise-richards-husband-aaron-phypers-plus-the-two-things-that-surprised-her-most-this-season/

🍹 Methinks He’s Thirsty…

I barely remember this dude, and if he hadn’t brought it up, I wouldn’t have remembered this incident at all.

https://realityblurb.com/2020/04/09/kathryn-dennis-ex-joseph-abruzzo-is-suing-bravo-and-southern-charm-cast-for-10-million-over-comments-about-his-pens-and-for-comparing-him-to-thomas-ravenel/

🖥 Virtual Reality…

Andy dishes on the VPR reunion.

https://realityblurb.com/2020/05/05/andy-cohen-confirms-vanderpump-rules-reunion-was-filmed-virtually-plus-he-dishes-on-how-it-went-and-shares-why-he-had-to-interrupt-the-taping/

🦥 Pandemics Make Strange Bedfellows…

It’s bigger than the Teddy Bear’s Picnic.

https://www.awesomeinventions.com/zoo-dolphins-meet-sloth/

🗿 Quotes of the Week

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.Theodore Roosevelt

Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it. – Groucho Marx

The struggle you’re in today is developing the strength you need tomorrow. – Robert Tew

It’s a baby, not a weedwhacker. – Danny (Gary Valentine), King of Queens, when Doug wants to borrow his baby.

Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. – Margaret Mead

It is easier to change a man’s religion than to change his diet.Margaret Mead

We are continually faced with great opportunities which are brilliantly disguised as unsolvable problems. – Margaret Mead

There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.Maya Angelou

🍾 Everybody’s Not Working For the Weekend…

I hope you’re making the most of any new free time you have, and changing it up on the weekend. Remember…

Can'tGetWorse

May 5, 2020 – Elizabeth Tells Nikolas To Let Spencer Decide, Lucci Speaks, Jax Has an Episode, Kelly Gets Good News & Nick Sings Star Wars

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

It’s going to be one of those weeks. I missed the beginning. In a nutshell, Ava wailed to Franco about Nikolas; Nelle met with Martin, who said the burden would be on her in the courtroom; and Sam clapped back at Kristina.

Elizabeth tells Nikolas, find someone else to confide in; she’s busy. He says he never meant for Hayden to stay away, and she says he uses people. He lies to their faces. His son grieved for him for two years, and instead of welcoming him when he returned, Nikolas lost him. Nikolas says Spencer sent him a letter saying he’s willing to explore their relationship again, and she says, that’s great news. His kid worships him, but she’d said it would take time for Spencer to heal. He tells her, don’t pop the champagne cork just yet. There’s a condition. He has to leave Ava. She says, that’s not a condition; it’s a get out of jail free card. Get rid of Ava, and bring Spencer home.

Franco tells Ava, Nikolas doesn’t respect or love her, and she says she doesn’t need his love and respect. His fortune is a different matter. He says she owns the penthouse, and the gallery, which is very successful. She says, none of that is Cassadine Island. They have properties all over the world, a centuries old fortune, and a prominent family name. He gets it. She wants to be queen of the castle. Find a real prince, and dump the frog. She says they have to discuss where she should hang the portrait. Over the fireplace seems cliché. She starts to babble, and he says he knows the real reason she married Nikolas.

On the phone, Carly tells Michael, Diane is thoroughly prepared to prove he’s the better parent. Nelle can try to con the judge, but it won’t work. The truth will come out.

Nina tells Jax, there’s nothing worse than being caught in the nightmare of a custody battle. It’s more difficult when the parent adores and is good for the child. He says, Valentin falls short on morals, ethics, and scruples, but she says Charlotte will make him a better person. He’s crazy about her. Jax says she’s a softie, and she says, because she’s willing to give Valentin the benefit of the doubt when it comes to Charlotte? Carly knocks on the door, and Nina says, it’s a bad time. What’s going on? Carly says, Wiley’s custody hearing is tomorrow, and she wonders if Nina has anything they can use against Nelle.

Nelle asks Martin why she’s paying so much money to him, if the case depends on her. He says she hasn’t had the most stable time in Port Charles, or anywhere else. She says they’re talking now, not the past. She has a respectable job at a famous magazine, not that she needs the money. She has a sale document from the purchase of the cutest house the judge has ever seen. Martin says, it looks like she put the money from the sale of her ELQ stock to good use. She says she’s ready to fight. It’s not looking good for Carly. Michael reminds her that she’s challenging Michael, not Carly, but she says Carly is pulling the strings, but it’s not enough. She’s going to lose because Michael just suffered a shattering breakup with Sasha. She left him for one of his best friends. Martin says, and she didn’t leak it to The Invader. She says, Wiley’s mother is not mean-spirited or malicious. He’s going to tell them. He asks her if she can keep a partner, or do they all die on her?

Ava tells Franco, they need to focus on the portrait. It needs to be hung before the gala. He says she can call it what she likes, but he knows it’s a certified nightmare pretending to be a gala. She asks why he thinks he knows her, and he says he knows what he sees in his eyes when she sits for him. She’s living with the consequences of her choices. In some weird way, her choices are motivated by love, and now she’s committed to a loveless situation with Nikolas. He gets it. She’s punishing herself for Kiki’s death.

Elizabeth tells Nikolas that Spencer has always been wise beyond his years. Look how smart he is now. It’s the perfect incentive for Nikolas to ditch Ava. Getting ride of her will take him a long way to turning into the good guy he is. He says he’s not a good guy, and she says, he was to her. He says he’s a Cassadine. If he divorces Ava, he loses everything; it’s in the agreement he signed. She asks if having Spencer back in his life wouldn’t be worth it, and he says he dreams about him and Spencer. Hanging out, laughing at nothing, just enjoying each other’s company. She says, his dream is coming true. Get rid of Ava. He says, it’s not that simple, and she says, because of the money? There’s got to be another reason. He doesn’t actually have feelings for Ava, does he?

Sam says, how dare Kristina? She has no idea what she’s talking about. Kristina says Sam and Jason are danger junkies. It’s what brought them together, and sustains them. It’s the day to day they can’t stand. Sam says the only thing she’s wanted is to keep her family safe, and Kristina says, that’s what she wanted with Drew. When Jason came back, they were ride or die again. They’re like Romeo and Juliet. Alexis says, enough, and Molly says, Sam and Jason’s love is real. Kristina says, no question Jason would die for Sam. He just can’t live for her.

Nelle tells Martin, Zack had an unfortunate accident, and he says, tell that to Diane. She says she pled guilty to spare the family more pain. He says he’s getting out the violin, and she says, while she was in prison, she prevented Ryan’s escape, and he almost took her good kidney. He says, she’s good; he’ll give her that. But if he brings up Michael’s bad relationships, hers will be in question as well. She says Shiloh was the love of her life, and his life was tragically cut short by Sam, who’s a good friend of Michael’s family. She cries herself to sleep every night because she’s still grieving. They made her a widow. He says he’ll use the argument, and asks if she’s come up with any character witnesses who can attest to her moral character. Who can testify as to her integrity, humanity, and compassion.

Nina says Nelle hasn’t worked for her for very long, and she hates to admit it, but she’s been an exemplary employee. Carly asks, what’s going on? Nina said she hired Nelle to keep an eye on her and help prove she’s an unfit parent. Nina says she can’t give Carly what she doesn’t have. Carly says Nelle refused to consent to Wiley’s surgery, and he’s going to need another one in six months so he can lead a happy, healthy life. If it’s up to Nelle, he won’t get it. Nina asks if Carly has ever tried listening to Nelle without jumping down her throat. Wouldn’t Wiley be better served if Michael compromised? No two parents hated each other more than Lulu and Valentin, but they put their differences aside for Charlotte’s sake, and Charlotte is better off. Jax says, sharing custody with Nelle wouldn’t be the best situation for Wiley, and Nina asks if the love of both parents isn’t the best situation. Carly asks if Nina is telling her that Nelle won her over.

Nikolas tells Elizabeth, he has anger, frustration, and profound distaste for Ava, and she asks if that isn’t enough to kick Ava out of his life. He says she doesn’t know what it’s cost him, surviving the shooting, and the fall. How long it took to heal, and planning his return. It was meticulously thought out. He was determined to keep alive the need to reclaim his name and Spencer’s birthright. She says, Spencer doesn’t care about his birthright; he just cares about Nikolas. He won’t be out in the street. 10% is a lot of money. He says, not enough for the way Spencer expects to live, and she asks if he’s talked to Spencer. She takes out her phone, and tells Nikolas, call him now. Ask what he’d rather have; his money or his dad?

Ava says Franco is wrong. He says she’s sabotaged any chance of her own happiness because she blames herself for hurting Kiki. Ava says she did hurt Kiki, over and over. She’ll never forgive herself, but it has nothing to do with this. Franco says she didn’t kill Kiki; Ryan did. But she’d rather fill her head with thoughts about how to deal with her creepy husband, than deal with thoughts of Kiki. Ava tells him to stop caring about her. Why doesn’t he go back to being the psychopath he used to be?

Nelle tells Martin, Carly locked her out on the hospital roof, while Carly’s mother forged a document consenting to unnecessary surgery on her son. He says, so she has no one to vouch for her character? She says she was at the hospital every day. The nurses saw her, and can attest to her maternal instincts. She even brought them donuts. He says he was thinking of someone she’s known longer than a month. Michael is going to have a veritable parade of character witnesses that are pillars of the community and upstanding citizens.

Nina says, maybe Nelle is trying to be a better person, and be the best mother she can. Carly says Nelle is a pathological liar, incapable of accepting kindness or showing love or affection. She’ll leave Wiley emotionally damaged like she is. Nina says, what about mental illness? and Carly says, she left Michael to die, and convinced Brad to switch babies. She’s a sociopath who’s totally playing Nina. Jax says he thinks Nelle is taking advantage, and Nina says, what if people judged Carly on who she used to be? What if she was kept away from her kids because of her past mistakes? What if no one had stood by her or spoke up for her? What kind of person would she be now?

Sam asks Kristina, what’s that supposed to mean? Alexis says she’d like to know too. Molly says, Jason put everything on the line to save Kristina, and she repeatedly said she was grateful. Kristina says, that’s not the point. Sam asks what her point is. Kristina has always supported their relationship, and Jason loves Kristina. How can Kristina say he wants to be away from her? Kristina says, their relationship is always hotter when they’ve been forced apart. If there was no drama, they wouldn’t survive.

Elizabeth tells Nikolas to call Spencer. Or is he afraid of what the answer might be? Nikolas says he’s not certain. When he saw Spencer, he said he didn’t care about the money, but that’s a lie. Spencer was born into the lifestyle he’s enjoyed since he was a child. There’s no way he’d give it up for this. She says, one thing she’s learned parenting Cameron is, you can’t make assumptions about teen boys. Cameron hated Franco, and now they’re each other’s biggest fans. Nikolas says, and it has nothing to do with Cameron’s mother being in love with Franco? She says, nice change in subject, and he asks if it’s working. He says he is curious about her and Franco. How did such two totally different people find happiness? She says, it took a while. Franco is kind, funny, and stood by her when she was the town pariah. They connected over art. Or at least they used to.

Franco tells Ava he’s not a psycho anymore, even if her invitation says otherwise. She says he had a brain tumor to blame. She doesn’t have that excuse. He says she doesn’t want that. He still has to deal with the people he’s hurt in his head every day. It’s not something that goes away. She asks how he copes, and he says, Elizabeth, her boys, he makes art, and helps patients through art therapy. She says, a healthy way to deal with the pain. Why didn’t she think of that? He says she’s not someone who does healthy, and she laughs. She says she prefers to play to her strengths. She’s not good at finding love, but she knows how to make money. Franco says, she does things like exploit his bad boy genius artist reputation. She says, he’s okay with that, isn’t he?

Nelle tells Martin, she has no family; her childhood was terrible. A good lawyer can make that work in her favor. He says he’ll pour it out, and she says she just wanted to give her son the life she never had. He says the judge will want to know the mother has someone in case of an emergency, the way the Quartermaines and Corinthoses came to Michael’s aid about Wiley’s heart condition. It’s going to be hard to convince a judge that a loving mother would prevent that. Every specialist agrees it improves the quality of life. Too bad she had no one to lean on when she had to make that decision; a close friend who could give her wise counsel and emotional support. She says, so he’s telling her that if she doesn’t have a dozen people saying what a good person she is, she can lose Wiley? He says, to be honest, the best she can hope for is shared custody.

Jax asks Carly and Nina to dial it down. He agrees custody fights are a nightmare, but Josslyn was fortunate because they stopped fighting before she was old enough to remember, but even when they were at odds, he not worried Carly would hurt Josslyn, or not allow her to be given medical attention to spite him. Nina says, they changed. Feelings change, people grow, and Josslyn is better for having the love of both parents. Why can’t Carly learn from the past, and give Nelle a little break? Jax says she can’t compare the two situations, and Carly says she never used Josslyn’s health as collateral, and risked her heath and safety to punish the family. That’s what Nelle did. There’s more to motherhood than biology. Carly guesses Nina doesn’t understand because she’s never been a mother.

Nelle asks why she’s paying Martin so much, if all he can get her is shared custody? She’s been telling Michael, he’ll be lucky if he sees the kid once a month. Martin says, it’s not going to help if she calls Wiley the kid before the judge, and she had no business threatening Michael. She says she thought it was a fact. She wants a refund on the large advance she paid him. He says that’s not happening, so she might as well hear him out and get her money’s worth. Michael’s family is a wise bunch, and if she’ll forgive the pun, they’re going to pull out everything to ensure Michael gets sole custody. Nelle asks if he isn’t even a tiny bit prepared. He says, he will be. The question is, if she gets custody, shared or otherwise, is she prepared to be a mother?

Franco tells Ava, he used, manipulated, and hurt a lot of people. Ava says, it helped sell paintings. Talent can only get you so far. Franco says, thanks, and they laugh. She says, it’s true though. People are fascinated by his criminal past. He provides the required talent, and she’ll remind the public who he was. He says he’s okay with that for the most part, but he’s not so sure Elizabeth is on board. She says, it’s not about Elizabeth, but he says, it’s all about Elizabeth. They had an argument, and he said something stupid that hurt her feelings. She says, they have a strong marriage. She knows Elizabeth will forgive him. Let her bring the bad boy in him back to the art world; the one bright spot in this foolish, ridiculous, awful life she’s created for herself.

Nikolas says, that’s why Elizabeth snapped at him; this is about Franco. Did he say something about her art? He’s not going away until she tells him. She says they received an invitation to Ava’s unveiling, and she wasn’t thrilled that Ava is playing up Franco’s criminal history. He says, she loves to create controversy, and Elizabeth tells him, Franco said, that’s how the art world works, but she wouldn’t know because she’s not a real artist. He says, don’t listen to that condescending fool, and she tells him, watch it. Franco is still her husband. He says he watched her find her talent and solace. If her life had taken a different turn, and she’d been supported and developed her craft, her vision would have put Franco to shame. Great art reflects the soul of the artist, and she’s never afraid to show her soul to the world.

Nelle asks, how dare Martin accuse her of being a bad mom? He tells her, that’s not what he said. Fighting custody is easy; raising children is hard. She says she carried Wiley for nine months inside her. She felt him move, and gave birth alone, with no one there to help. If that doesn’t prepare her for motherhood, she doesn’t know what does. He suggests she read some blogs, and buy a baby book or two. Tell the judge about the few moments she spent with her baby before he was cruelly stolen. And don’t wear waterproof mascara. He wants the judge to have a front row seat to her crying her eyes out. She says, anything else? and he says, a character witness. Preferably not one in prison. He’s going to pull out all the stops to convince the judge she should have Wiley. She says he’d better. He doesn’t want to let her down.

Carly says she knows Nina still feels a connection to her baby, and believes it’s instinctive that connection would make her the best mother. Carly is sure Nina would have been, because she’s a good person, and has it in her. Nelle doesn’t. Nina asks if Carly doesn’t think she imagines every day what she missed, and Carly says, then use it. Remind herself what Nelle did when she handed over the baby to Brad, then told Michael their baby died. Nina says, maybe Nelle is telling the truth. Brad lied about everything. What if he placed the dead baby in Nelle’s arms when she was unconscious? Carly says, Nelle was very conscious. She knew what she was doing, and didn’t care about Wiley. She only cared about hurting Michael. Think about that, and tell her that she doesn’t remember one incident that will help Michael’s custody case against Nelle. Carly leaves, and Nelle asks if Jax thinks she’s wrong, and she’s misunderstanding Nelle’s motives.

Carly waits for the elevator. The doors open, and she and Nelle face each other.

Sam asks if Kristina doesn’t think she wants a quiet life with Jason and the kids. It’s all she dreams about, but something always gets in the way. Molly says, like Shiloh. Sam and Jason had to pretend they weren’t together. Alexis says, Sam went to prison to protect Kristina. Kristina says, and as long as she stays away from Jason, Sam is home free. But she can’t help herself. She’ll find a way to break the rules, sneak around, and spice it up. And Jason appreciates it, when he’s not taking care of Carly and her dad. How many times has she seen him busy cleaning up their messes, while Sam is home taking care of the kids? Her opinion still stands. Jason would die for Sam, but his first priority is Sonny and Carly.

Nikolas doubts Elizabeth will ever trust him again, and says he has no right to ask her to. Elizabeth says he can change who he is now, and be who he used to be when they were friends. She thinks he should give it a chance. He says, as her almost friend, he believes she should think about painting again. She says Franco got her some art supplies for their anniversary, and he says, so Franco isn’t a completely insensitive fool. She says, maybe she’s too sensitive, and he says, a true artist should be. She says, as his almost friend, she thinks he should call Spencer.

Ava says she’s trying to help Franco. He did the same for her just now. He says he heard a bunch of denial. She says she’s not accepting the help because she knows he’s right. She knows why she married Nikolas, but maybe having the understanding will make her life more bearable. Franco says, it would be even more bearable without Nikolas, but she says, they’re talking about him. Apologize, and bring Elizabeth flowers. He has a good marriage. Make it better. He says, she does like flowers. All he cares about is making her happy, and the boys too. She says, at least she’ll know she did something right, and he says glad he could help. She kisses his cheek, and says, more than he knows.

Nelle asks if Carly was trash talking her to Nina. Carly says, she was trying to, but Nina seems to think she’s Nelle’s friend. Too bad Nelle will betray her, like she did everyone else. Carly gets in the elevator, and the doors close.

Jax tells Nina, Carly made some good points about Nelle, and Nina says she’s aware of Nelle’s dark side, but she’s seen Nelle’s vulnerable side. She can’t explain it, but she doesn’t think it’s an act. Nelle listens outside the door. Jax says he thinks Nelle only cares about herself, and Nina says, maybe to change she needs a person who believes in her. Maybe she’s that person who will bring out the best in Nelle. Nelle knocks, and comes in. Jax tells Nina, be careful. He’s going to catch up with Carly.

Jax leaves, and Nelle says, sorry. She hopes she wasn’t interrupting anything. Nina says, no. They were done. Nelle says she took care of the errands Nina asked her to. She thanks Nina for standing up for her, and Nina says, don’t make her regret it. Nelle says, she won’t. In fact, she was going to ask Nina for a favor; a pretty big one. Nina asks what it is, and Nelle says, Wiley’s custody hearing is tomorrow. She has no one to vouch for her; Carly made sure of that. She was wondering if Nina would be willing to testify on her behalf.

Tomorrow, Robert tells Peter to get out, Sonny asks Mike what he needs, and Sasha is at odds with Brook.

👠 Erica Live…

Susan Lucci will be having a live chat on May 7th at 1 pm ET.

https://www.soapsindepth.com/posts/abc/live-chat-susan-lucci

Vanderpump Rules

At SUR, Danica tells Ariana that Jax is going to be an hour late. She’s not sure how he gets away with half the sh*t he does. Dayna asks how Scheana’s weekend was, and Scheana says she and Brett went to Palm Springs to do her music video. It’s an R&B song called One More Time; it’s a baby making song, and different from what she’s done. She quickly adds that he’d agreed to it months ago. In Dayna’s interview, she says, this is the second guy she’s been interested in that Scheana has taken to Palm Springs. WTF goes on in Palm Springs? Scheana shows Dayna some raw footage, which is basically soft core porn, and borderline on the soft. Dayna asks if she’s topless, and Scheana says she may have been. In her interview, Dayna tells us she literally doesn’t know what to say, she’s so uncomfortable. She tells Scheana, that’s a video. Good for her.

Tom and Jax bring their athletic shoes to be cleaned at a place Tom found online. Jax asks how they do it, but the cleaner says he can’t disclose their method. In Jax’s interview, he says he had no sudden urge to hang out with Tom. He hasn’t been a great friend. We flash back to where Jax was being a d*ck to Tom, and Jax says he needed his sneakers cleaned, so why not let Tom pay for the gas? Jax still has the tags on his shoes because he thinks it makes him seem younger. He asks if that’s cool, but the cleaner, who is younger, says he always takes off the tags. Jax’s credit card doesn’t go through, and he says it happens all the time. We see several clips of that, and he gives the cleaner another card. He tells Tom about helping Kristen by cutting the grass. He says she still loves Carter, and told him Carter knows about other guys she’s hooked up with. Who knows what goes on behind closed doors? Tom says things are great at his house; better than ever. Jax says he notices Ariana give Tom backhanded comments, but Tom says they never name call. He suggests Jax take a second sometimes, and not get too responsive. Jax admits he’s bad at it. In his interview, Tom says, when Jax feels bored, he picks someone or something to focus his anger and attention on, so he feels important or better about himself. Tom says he’s trying to help out as a friend. Jax says, no one’s perfect.

Brittany meets Stassi at the dog park, and puts sunglasses on her dog. Stassi tells Brittany she thought when she finally got engaged, she’d be a chill bride, but nope. Brittany has the feeling Stassi is going to be double what she was. In Stassi’s interview, she says, people thought she was a monster on her birthday, just wait. The wedding will be a nightmare. They admire each other’s rings, and Stassi asks how annoying Brittany thinks they are. Brittany says, they really are annoying, but eff off; she’s happy. Stassi says when she posted her engagement photo, someone said they were never so excited to see a couple get married. Jax replied, thanks a lot. Brittany says, Jax is an attention whore, but he’s happy for them. She says she knows Stassi and Kristen are on the outs, but she and Jax are having a pool party, and asks if Stassi won’t come if she invites Kristen. Stassi says she’d still come, and Brittany says she worries about her friends not coming. In Brittany’s interview, she says she loves cooking, and cleaning; getting ready and preparing for people to come over. It’s the first time they’re going to have a big group at their new house. Stassi says if she and Kristen can’t get along in normal moments, Kristen can’t be at the big ones. I nod in agreement.

Ariana teaches Dayna how to make drinks. Dayna is dying to bartend. Scheana asks Jax if he wants to see footage from her video, and he says, not really. She asks what’s up his ass? and he says, everyone isn’t honest. Tom and Ariana said he took Kristen’s bait. He thinks something is going on with Tom. He doesn’t really talk about their relationship. In his interview, Jax says he thinks their relationship is a façade. It looks pretty on the outside, but he doesn’t see them happy together, and thinks buying the house was a bad idea. It’s not a normal relationship. He tells Scheana, he thinks Ariana is miserable. Scheana says Ariana is depressed, and Jax says when Ariana doesn’t like something, she says she’s depressed. Ariana invites Dayna to a dinner party she and Tom are having, and Dayna says she might be late. Ariana says, easy breezy. Scheana asks if Jax is going to Max’s beach clean-up. He says they all live in the valley, and have to drive a while to get there. The fumes in the air defeat the purpose.

Lisa goes to Vanderpump Dogs. Puffy! Lala is helping put out merchandise, and Lisa says they have two dogs coming in from Puerto Rico. Lala says she can help with intake, and Lisa says she’s good at intake. Lala says she doesn’t need a cocktail to be vulgar. She’s approaching ten months, and thinks James is steering clear of drinking. She’s proud of him.

Raquel asks where James found the pink silverware, and he says he’s been doing stuff today. She sees flowers on the table, and he says they’re having filet mignon with roasted potatoes and carrots. In his interview, James says he needed to do some serious rebuilding in his relationships, and Raquel is the one who means the most. That’s what life is all about. He tells her about the beach clean-up, and says they were invited. It made his day. He hopes he’s enough without drinking, and she says, of course he is. He’s the ultimate him, and so fun to be around. He says he knows.

Lisa tells Lala that James was aware there was a problem when he lost his job and his friends, but it happened with Raquel, it struck a chord. Lala says she’s happy for James, and Lisa thinks he’s on the road to recovery, but she’s cautiously optimistic.

The group gathers at the beach, and Kristen gives Stassi a kiss. In Stassi’s interview, she says, it’s awkward AF. In Max’s interview, he says he was born Hawaii, and grew up in San Diego, and trash and plastic is bad for the sealife. It means a lot to him to make sure it’s clean, since he swims in it. I live near a beach, and I hear that. I hate seeing all the plastic that washes up, and it makes me wonder just how much doesn’t wash up. Max says they’re going to pick up trash, then hang out. They take paper bags, and comb the beach. In Katie’s interview, she says he picked literally the cleanest beach she’s ever been to. It’s cleaner than her house. Dayna asks Brett how Palm Springs was. Brett says it was a video about having sex, and they were doing fake strokes and pipe laying. At one point, he felt violated, when Scheana was biting his ear, and licking the earwax out of it. Blech. He had to tell her, no. If he’d wanted to, he could have literally had sex with her on camera. She asked if he wanted a BJ, and he said no. It was hard, since he loves them. Dayna says, he’s lying, and he says, no. He’s not leading Scheana on; he was doing her a favor. Dayna asks if he thinks Scheana might see it differently. He has to set boundaries or she’ll be taking advantage. Lala says, it’s hard with Scheana. You say, this isn’t going to happen, but in the back of Scheana’s mind… Dayna says, seriously, there’s a chance. Max says Jax told him the beach clean-up was a dumb idea, and everyone is pissed at him for planning it. It’s dumb, pointless, and nobody cares. Tom says Jax texted him, saying Max is trying to one-up him. They’ve never heard anything like that before. We flash back to Jax telling Tom, he’s the number one guy in the group. Tom thinks Jax is jealous that he’s not the center of attention, and Max says he’s not upset that Jax isn’t there.

In Kristen’s interview, she says her job as an entrepreneur is never done. She’s doing a pop-up event to spread the word about her brand, and sell some shirts. She tells Schwartz that Stassi isn’t coming, and he says Katie isn’t either. Kristen says she’s not surprised, but she was hopeful. Tom texts Jax that everyone is there except him, and Jax texts Tom that he can skip their pool party. Brett tells Max that Scheana said Dayna still had feelings for him, and asks how he feels about her. Stassi tells Dayna that she’s heard Dayna has a love triangle going on. Max tells Brett that he doesn’t want to talk about it, and Brett asks if it would be bad if he hooked up with Dayna. Dayna tells Stassi that she told Brett, she wished she’d met him before Max. In Dayna’s interview, she says, it’s fun and games to be with the emotionally unavailable hot guy, until it’s time to have a real conversation about feelings. Max thanks everyone for coming, and says he appreciates it. Jax texted him that everyone was mad at him for planning it. Brittany tells him, don’t listen, and Katie says, he’s just being an a-hole. In Schwartz’s interview, he says, Jax’s borderline abusive rage texts are a dynamic of the relationship. He’s developed a technique – keep deleting. You’ll sleep in peace, and live happily ever after. He does the same thing with Katie. Brittany tells them, Jax said it was Mercury’s in Gatorade. In Stassi’s interview, she says, Jax will point his finger at anything and anyone to absolve himself of what he’s doing. In Brittany’s interview, she says, it sucks that she feels like she has to answer and take up for Jax when he does these things, but she married him knowing he’s that person. She tells Max that she’ll tell Jax to stop.

Lisa tells Raquel that she checks on James more than her children. We flash back to Lisa video chatting with James, and says she hopes he’s telling the truth. Raquel tells her that they went to a club last night, and James didn’t drink a sip. Lisa tells her, James said he was doing well, but she’s never quite sure if she’s getting the true story. In Lisa’s interview, she says she’s such a mother. She wants to make everything right. She asks Raquel if the relationship is different, and Raquel says it is.

Tom tells Ariana she looks great. In her interview, Ariana says she manages her depression by focusing on the things she loves, and she loves hosting and cooking for people. Scheana arrives with some guy I’ve never seen, who I think is named Shawn. Schwartz, Katie, Max, Brett, and Dayna follow. Tom says, Jax’s rage texts continue. He reads, if you’re talking sh*t about me, don’t bother coming. YOU DID; don’t come. Max says he got a bunch on his way there. Jax asked why Max was crying to his wife, and don’t come to his house. Max says all he did was ask him to come to the beach, and Jax told him that he’s not welcome. Schwartz says, Jax is being a d*ck for no reason; it’s unprovoked. In some bizarre moment of clarity, Scheana says, it’s not about Jax, so he didn’t come. In her interview, she says, his 40th is over, the wedding is over, and no one is paying attention to him, so he has to fight with his friends. It’s classic Jax. Tom thinks they should have a rager there at the same time as the pool party, and teach him a lesson. Katie says her pants got wet thinking about it. Ariana says, dinner is served. Katie says, whoever picks up their phone has to buy a table for Tom and Ariana. Ariana thanks everyone for coming to dinner at their rented table. She’s happy in life, and loves them. Max asks Dayna to come outside, and they sit on the patio. He says he’s not good at expressing how he feels, but it feels weird seeing her and Brett. He’s not telling her not to do this, but he’s saying he clearly still has feelings for her. Dayna says when the next shiny thing comes along, she’ll be in his rear view. He says he’s had his past, but he’s never moved forward like he did with her. She says, then why not keep moving forward? and he says it scared him to have feelings. It’s not an excuse, but he’s scared because he likes her, and sometimes love goes south. In his experience, it hasn’t been good for him. In Dayna’s interview, she says she never stopped caring about Max, but she thinks part of the reason he’s saying this is because Brett is in the picture. She thinks he does care about her, but he makes her feel confused. Max says he wants her to know it’s cool, but it’s also not cool. Dayna asks if he hears himself; she’s getting whiplash. Max says he’s not going to attack them over it, and Dayna asks what she’s supposed to do with that; it’s ambiguous.

At Kristen’s event, she says, everyone get wasted and shop. Scheana tells Brett, they still need one more thing for the video. He asks if she’s going to be making out with his ear or biting him. They literally (taking a drink now) simulated a sexual situation. Scheana says, it’s called acting; don’t take it so seriously. He says he wanted to wear jeans, and she told him to take them off. She asks, who wears clothes in bed? In Brett’s interview, he says he thinks Scheana’s and his ideas of a sexy video are the opposite. He thinks less is more, but she wants to show everybody everything. It’s not sexy. He says he felt uncomfortable, and doesn’t want her to have the wrong idea. She tells him, don’t be cocky; it’s just a video. In Scheana’s interview, she says he knew the concept of the video. She tells Brett that it was awkward for her too, but she’s good at her job. He doesn’t believe she didn’t like it, and she says she’s going to buy some T-shirts. Dayna laughs. I wonder if Scheana believes her own lies.

Jax joins Max and Tom, and says he’s sorry. It wasn’t his intention, and he’s the first to apologize when he’s wrong. He was out of line, and he’s going through mental issues. He’s angry all the time, and calls it an episode. In Tom’s interview, he says, 90% of the time, Jax is full of sh*t. He spins things around to create pity. Jax says, part of it was him uninviting them. They can obviously come. Scheana tells Charli about Brett being uncomfortable with the video, and Charli says he should have known what it was when he signed up. Scheana calls Brett over, and Charli jets. She says she doesn’t want him feeling uncomfortable, and he doesn’t have to come. He says he did her a favor, and she says she doesn’t want him there, since he brought up how uncomfortable he was. In her interview, Scheana says, guys in L.A. suck. If she’s sexy, she’s coming on too strong, but if she plays hard to get, that’s not good either. How is she supposed to know what they want, if they don’t say it? Brett asks if they’re good, and she says they’re good. He says when she flashes her fingers like that, they’re not good.

Jax asks Kristen where Carter is, and she says he’s working. In her interview, Kristen says when Stassi didn’t ask her to the engagement party, she felt vulnerable and alone, and she called Carter. They had sex. It was great. Jax says Kristen hooked up with a guy in a video that Carter saw. Kristen says, it was four years ago, and Jax asks her to swear on her life and her friendships. She says it’s none of his business, but it was four years ago. In Kristen’s interview, she says, of course she’s lying. Jax has the biggest mouth ever, and it’s no one’s effing business. In Jax’s interview, he wonders if Kristen doesn’t get tired of telling stories, and not knowing what she told people. She’s losing friends left and right. No one believes her, and it’s all deny, deny, deny. Lala joins the conversation, and Kristen asks if they can not do this where she’s selling things. Jax stomps off, griping that Kristen lies about everything, and she’s delusional. Brittany says he’s projecting to people who don’t know him. What’s wrong with him?

James goes to SUR, and asks for a table for one in Raquel’s section. Lisa comes in, and sits with him. She asks if his girlfriend is working, and he says he’s in her section. Lisa says he can’t stay away, and tastes his drink. She says she approves. Raquel comes to the table, and asks if she wants a glass of rosé. Lisa asks if the Pope has a balcony, and Raquel doesn’t understand. In her interview, she asks if everyone knows the Pope drinks rosé on his balcony. Lisa says she loves Raquel, and James says Raquel had to think about that. He’s having the best time. Lisa asks, what’s wrong? and James says he wishes he and Raquel worked at the same time. In Lisa’s interview, she says, James has had no problem asking for his job back. He starts out sweet and polite, then slyly tries to weasel back in. Then when he doesn’t get what he wants, he gets demanding, but this time seems to feel different. Lisa tells James, you know what? They don’t have a DJ for tonight. He gets all excited, and says, onward and upward. She says she has faith in him. In James’s interview, he says, white Kanye is back in business. He tells Raquel, and she says, amazing. She’s so excited for him.

Jax and Brittany argue about Kristen’s time frame, and Brittany asks why he’s getting mad. It has nothing to do with him. He asks if he’s not allowed a bad day, and she says he’s allowed a bad day, but he’s not allowed to take it out on her. She doesn’t get why he’s so affected. He asks if that’s it than, and she says, no. Obviously she loves him. They’ve been through worse, and she’s stood by his side. Give her some credit. He doesn’t have to lay blame. He says he has super highs and lows. He smokes and gains weight, then he takes Adderall for it. He can’t win. Geez. No wonder he’s a mess. Brittany says, as soon as the wedding was over, nothing was ever good enough. Jax says they’re going to fight. It’s not Leave It To Beaver. He can give her that if she wants, but they’d have to move to Kentucky. She says she doesn’t want him to circle back to his old ways, and being mean. She starts to cry, and says, it breaks her heart.

Next time, a competing pool party; Brittany wonders if they’re going to have anyone at their house; Stassi tells Jax that he’s losing his mind; Lisa and Ken are developing a garden bar, and would like to see the Toms invest for a 10% share; and Lala says Max and Brett are getting messy.

If Loving You Is Wrong

Oh yeah the cowboy bar. Ha-ha! I forgot.

Brad tells the baby to breathe, and calls 911. The operator tells him to check the baby’s airway, and he says, there’s a fireman across the street. He runs out, and Natalie smacks into him with her car. She and Esperanza jump out, and he tells them, the baby isn’t breathing. Natalie and Esperanza run inside the house, and Esperanza takes the phone from Brad. She asks, what happened? and he says he checked on the baby, and he wasn’t breathing. She asks if the baby was on his back, but he says, no. The baby was on his stomach. Marcie must have put him that way. Esperanza starts to tell the operator that they need an ambulance, but Natalie says, no; they don’t need it. Brad says, he’s not dead? and Natalie says, he’s sleeping. Esperanza tells the operator, the baby’s asleep. They just have a panicked man who doesn’t know what to do with a baby; they don’t need anyone. Brad stammers, and Natalie shows him how to put a finger under the baby’s nose. He says he thought the baby’s chest wasn’t moving, and Esperanza asks if he actually took a look. He needs to relax. She tells him that babies need to sleep on their backs, and he says he just panicked. Natalie asks if he’ll be all right, and he says he has a sitter coming. He’s good until then. Esperanza says, what about Alex? Does he know where she is? He says he’s sure she’ll be home soon, but Natalie says she doesn’t think… Esperanza stops her, and Brad says they look like they know something. Natalie says she doesn’t think he wants to know, and Brad asks if they saw her. She needs to come back and take care of the kids, and the other kid. Natalie says, she’s at a bar, and he says he doesn’t care. Esperanza says she thinks he should get her. It’s a sleazy, dirty, grimy place. Actually, it isn’t, but okay. She says, it’s not somewhere Brad would want her, and he says, it suits her. He’s done. They’re divorced, and he doesn’t care. Esperanza asks if he’s going to raise the kids on his own, and he says he’ll have to. Natalie says, the baby is fine, and Esperanza says, they can’t leave her. Natalie says, she’s grown, and Esperanza suggests she stay with the kids while Brad brings her back. Natalie says he can’t do that, and Brad says he won’t do it. Esperanza says, she’ll do it then. She leaves, and Natalie asks if Brad will be okay. He tells her he will, and she reminds him not to lay the baby on his stomach. She says, he’s welcome, and he says, sorry.

Natalie sees Tyrell, and asks if he’s settled in. He says he is, and asks if Justice is home. She said around 3, right? She says, Kelly doesn’t really want him to see Justice. She wants to talk to him first. He asks when Natalie thinks she’ll be home, but Natalie doesn’t know. He asks if she thinks Lushion could get him in to see Kelly, and she says she’ll ask him. He wonders if he could borrow some bread, and she says, he wants to borrow money? He says, no; bread, and she laughs. She tells him to come in, and he says he’s been in jail. She asks if he’s going to rob her, and he says, not at all. They head into the house. Tyrell says, sorry. When people know he’s been in jail, they get scared. Natalie says she has a son in jail. He asks how long her son has got, and she says, a day is too long. She gives him a loaf of bread, and asks if he needs anything else. He says the bread will do, and she asks if he’s eaten. She doesn’t think there’s anything over at Kelly’s, and he says there are canned beans. She says she’ll make him a sandwich. He sits, and says he needs to see Kelly. She says she’ll call Lushion, and he says she’s really kind. She hopes someone is kind to her son. He asks what her son’s name is, and she says, Joey; does he know him? He says, he doesn’t, and asks when she thinks Kelly will get out. She says, they’re working hard on it, and he says he misses her; she’s the love of his life. They were kids in love and having fun; it was crazy. He’s pretty sure Kelly doesn’t feel the same anymore. Natalie says he doesn’t know that, and he says he hopes they can get back together.

There’s a knock at Brad’s door. It’s Dr. Raston, and he says he wasn’t expecting her. she says she wanted to come by and check on him. Brad says Alex isn’t back; that’s why she’s there, right? She says she’s sorry, and he says he’s there taking care of the kids. He learned a valuable lesson about babies sleeping on their fronts. He doesn’t want to make it awkward, but asks why Alex went to see her. She asks, what’s going on? and he tells her, look for herself, showing her the laptop. He says Alex has been on an online dating site, sleeping with lots of men. The doctor says she’s sorry, and he says, it is what it is. He says he’ll have to get tested – for everything. If she’s given him something… Dr. Raston tells him not to get ahead of himself. He asks how a person can be one way for ten years, then break. She can’t answer that, but knows a therapist who can. He says he’s not interested, and she says she knows he’s angry. He says she doesn’t know the half of it, and she says she’s sorry. He says he is too, and she tells him, she’s there if he needs her. He says he’s sorry for being rude; it’s a lot. She understands, and he thanks her for coming by.

Nurse Pat visits Tyrell, and asks if he lives there now. Nice. She asks who lives there, and he says, a friend. He asks if she wants some wine, but she says she’s got to go to work. She only has an hour. He says that’s plenty of time, and she asks if his mom doesn’t live there. He says, not his mom, his ex. She says, no bitch is going to beat her down. Come to her house. She sees a picture of Kelly, and says, hell no. That’s her? She was Kelly’s nurse in jail. He says, small world, and she says, this is where she killed Travis? Now she knows she’s getting out of there. She tells him, call one of his other strays, and opens the door. She says, damn, and he says, yeah, damn. She leaves, and he says, damn. He calls someone, and says he’s out. He’s a free man.

Alex rides the bull. It’s slightly more crowded in the bar now. She says, look what the cat dragged in, and it’s Randal. He asks, what the hell is going on up in here? and she says she’s riding a bull. He says he sees that. She’s back to her hillbilly whore roots. She says, jealous? and tells him to help her down. He does, and she tells Johnny to give her another shot. He asks what he can get for her friend, and Randal says he’s good. Johnny says, if you come into this bar, you drink. Alex says, it’s fine; he’ll have a beer. And a shot. Randal asks, who’s that? and she says, her new sponsor. He asks if she’s in recovery now, and she says, no; she’s staying with him a little while. They’re going to shack up while she figures things out. He asks, what the hell is wrong with her? and she says, he thinks she’s crazy? He says, hell yeah. He finally drove her mad. She says he didn’t, and he laughs. She says she’s completely free. If he did that, fine. She’s finally free to do whatever she wants. Nobody to stop her. He says she can’t do that, and she asks, why? He says he’s not through making her life a living hell. She says, he can’t do that; the pressure’s off. He says she’s going home; let’s go. She says, no, and he tries to strongarm her. She says she’s not going anywhere, and he says, want a bet? She tells him, look around real quick. Look at where he is; surrounded by a bunch of good old boys. Does he want to be grabbing up on her? He thinks she knows he doesn’t give a damn, and he pulls her off the bar stool. Johnny takes out a gun, and says, put his hands on her again, and he’ll blow Randal’s brains out. Alex says, he means it. Johnny tells Randal, get his ass on out of there, and don’t come back. Alex says, he really means it. Randal backs up, and goes toward the door, and Alex says she loves a man with a gun. Randal slowly leaves, and Johnny asks if Alex is doing okay. What does she want? She says, a shot, and he says, this one’s on the house, but she better ride that bull again.

Eddie barges into Larry’s office. Larry tells his poor assistant, it’s okay. Eddie asks how Larry is, and Larry says, better now that Eddie is  there. Eddie says, him too. He brought Larry something he shouldn’t have. He thinks Larry will like it. Larry asks if he should take his clothes off. Eddie says, keep them on, but open his mouth nice and wide. Eddie puts his feet up on the desk, and asks, how much would a long list of names regarding the Cane case be worth? Larry says he has no idea what Eddie is talking about, and Eddie says he has every idea Larry represents the church. What’s the price for the list of women Travis assaulted? If Larry tells him what he wants to know, he’ll be more than happy to share his information. Larry asks how and where he got it, and Eddie says, from Kelly’s cell. A sister from the church gave it to her. Larry says, so they’re trying to get her off, and Eddie says, seems that way. Larry calls Ian to come in. He tells Ian, this gentleman says he has information that was going to be used to get Kelly off. He says it was found in her cell. Has Ian gotten in touch with Carl? Ian says, not yet, but he will. Ian asks Eddie how much it’s worth, and Eddie says, the question is, how much is it worth to him? It’s a lot of bad publicity for the church. What’s the price tag on something like that? He’ll start at 200 (I’m assuming he means thousand, but he is pretty stupid). Larry says, $50K now, in cash. Eddie thinks he can get more than that, but he’ll start with $50K. Larry tells Ian to go to the safe, and get the money, and Ian says, right away. He leaves, and Larry asks if Eddie wants a drink. Eddie says, nah. He knows what Larry mixes in. Larry says he’s learned his lesson, huh? There are no other copies? Eddie says, it’s the only one. How long is this going to take? Larry says, patience is a virtue, and Eddie says he’s not patient. Larry asks again if Eddie wants a drink, and Eddie says, that’s the second time. He’s not interested. Bring him the money.

Steven asks Esperanza how her day is going, and she says, not so good, so far. He says, it’s not Eddie? and she says, it’s Alex. She asks if he’ll go somewhere with her quick. Alex is at a dive bar doing God knows what. She doesn’t think Alex should be there. He says, she’s an adult, and Esperanza says, a very drunk one. Steven says, let her stay and have a good time, and she asks if he’s coming with her. He says he said he would. He just has to tell Lushion something first.

Ian sits in Lushion’s office. Lushion says, he hasn’t returned Ian’s texts? Ian says, no, and Lushion asks, who is this kid? He said to meet there. Ian asks, where’s the information? Lushion says, Eddie happened, and Ian says, he took it? Lushion says, yeah, and Ian asks if there are any copies. Lushion says there aren’t, and Ian says, Eddie sold it to Larry. Lushion asks why Larry would buy it (which I’d think he’d know), and Ian says, Eddie lied, and said he had the rest of the information, and could keep it quiet. He’s sorry. Lushion asks, was Ian in on this? Ian says he’s trying help her. Why? Lushion says, it sounds fishy. Ian says Lushion can trust him, and Lushion says Ian needs to start showing him something. Ian says, this kid can handle it. It will be okay. Lushion asks if he doesn’t think they’re waiting too long. Ian says, they’re both in the result business, and Lushion says, show him something. Steven stops by, and says, the DA is there, in the interrogation room. She wants to see Lushion. Lushion and Larry leave the office.

Larry is standing around the corner, and asks what Ian is dong there. Ian says he’s there for the Vasquez case. What is Larry doing there? Larry says, the DA asked to see him. Ian asks, for what? but Larry doesn’t know. He asks Ian to come with him. Lushion is like, hmm… and follows.

In the interrogation room, the DA sits with Carl. Larry says he didn’t know it was going to be a party. Ian is his plus one. What’s going on? The DA (whose first name I forgot) says, this, and plops a folder down, and this affidavit. This young man, their public defender star, delivered. Larry asks where he got this, and Carl says, his sources are confidential. Larry says the cases settled out of court, but Carl says, it won’t matter. They’re ready to testify. He spoke to all of them. Larry asks how he got his hands on this, and Carl says, confidential. Larry says, right, but they can still prosecute. The DA says, they’re not prosecuting Kelly for anything. Her office is opening an investigation into the allegations against Travis and his church. They need to get themselves together. Larry asks if she’s aware that it’s an election year, and she asks if he’s trying to threaten her. That would not be wise. She tells Lushion, they’re dropping the murder charge. They believe it was self-defense. Lushion says, no question. The DA says, they’re done. Larry asks who is Carl? How does he do this. Carl says, it’s what he does, and Larry says, he didn’t have help? Carl says, the good Lord; hallelujah. Everyone leaves, and Lushion laughs. He says, Carl did it. Carl says Lushion doubted him? Come on. Lushion says he didn’t. Good job. Let’s go tell her.

Larry tells Ian, he smells a rat, and he knows who it was – Eddie. He’s wet behind the ears, and they had the same thing. Ian says, he’s not Larry’s problem, but Larry says Eddie took $50K from him, but he’ll get it back. Watch him.

Marcie returns to Brad’s house, and says, she’s not back yet? He says, no, and Marcie says, she thought Alex would be back. She was drunk and mad, and maybe she will when she sobers up. He says he doesn’t know, and she hands him a card. She says, it’s a lawyer. He needs to get custody of his kids. He asks how he explains it to them, and she says, carefully? He says, they’re going to be home soon, and she says he’ll need to have a sit-down with them. He asks if she’ll stay, but she doesn’t know if it’s a good idea. He says he’ll have to explain it to them sooner or later; there’s a lot going on. She says, maybe he should wait, but he says, what’s the point? He’s going to have to move in, and he wants her to move in as well. She asks if it isn’t a lot for the kids, and he says, they’ll adjust. The baby cries, and he says he’ll need help with this one. She says, the baby isn’t his. Alex will have to give him up for adoption. Is he sure he’s ready to take this on? He says he’s ready to do what he has to do. She tells him, call Larry, and they’ll do what they have to do. He says, done, and kisses her.

Lushion knocks on Kelly’s cell. She asks if he found Eddie, and he says he did. She says, thank God. He got the pictures back? He says, no, and she repeatedly says, oh my God. He says, but it’s all right, and she says, it’s not. She’s still in there. He says, not for long, and she tells him, he keeps saying that, but she can’t take it anymore. She feels like she’s going to die in there. That bastard Eddie took it all away from her. Lushion tells her, hold on, and she says she feels like a caged animal. He says, if she hates it there, she’s going to love this guy. Carl steps forward, and she says, what the hell is he doing here? Carl says, she has hostility for him, and Lushion tells her, she’d said Carl was so green he can’t see straight. Is that any way to talk about the man got her off? She says, what words are coming out of his mouth? and Lushion says, she’s free to go. He unlocks the cell, and she stands there a moment. She asks if he’s playing with her, but he promises he’s not. She cries and thanks him. She laugh/cries, and thanks them both. Lushion asks if she doesn’t want to know what happened, and she says, no. She doesn’t want them to change their minds; she just wants to leave. He says, they won’t change their minds, and she asks, what happened? Lushion says, they looked at the evidence, and saw it was self-defense; they saw all the victims. Kelly thanks Carl, and he says, him? The green kid? She thanks Lushion again, and kisses him on the mouth.

Next time, Natalie gets into it with Randal, Larry approaches Eddie about the money, Alex goes home, and Tanya freaks out.

🍹 May the Cinco de Mayo Be With You…

Another Temptation Tuesday has come and gone, and along with it your virtual margarita party, and whatever Star Wars remembrance you brought forth for the fourth. Stay safe, stay focused, and stay having a sense of humor.

April 22, 2020 – Willow Tells Michael What She Saw, Summer Duds, Erika Lands Chicago & Not That Long

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Elizabeth comes by Mike’s room at Turning Woods, and says she misses Mike’s smile. She tells Sonny, she knows some days are better than others, and today was rough. She’s hoping the family and his surroundings will be a comfort. Sonny tells Mike to get some rest. When Mike is ready to talk, he’ll be there.

Willow goes to Charlie’s. She flashes back to finding Sasha and Chase together. She remembers telling Chase, when they thought she was pregnant, he said it would be a dream come true. He says, eventually, when they decide together. She says she thought they were on the same page, and he says, every waking moment, she’s consumed, and can’t let go. It’s like she got on the train, it left the station, and she never realized he got left behind. She goes into Charlies, and sees Michael there. He says he wanted it to be just the two of them without Diane. He loves Diane, but she’s a lawyer, and the last thing he wants is for Willow to feel uncomfortable. Willow remembers seeing Chase and Sasha kissing on the couch, and Sasha saying Willow wasn’t supposed to come home.

Chase and Sasha look at their wine glasses. She says, it’s not too late to go after Willow, and tell her the truth; they faked all this. They shoved it together, and it was stupid and crazy. Michael and Willow are the best things that have ever happened to them, and she’s so sorry. It might be awkward for a while, and maybe they can’t hang out together anymore, but they’ll have the people they love back. Chase says, it sounds amazing and awesome for them, but what about Michael and Willow? Does she think they’ll be happier with them, or together with Wiley?

Nina says Nelle is at work late, and Nelle says she wants to get it in while she can. She won’t be able to work nights when Wiley is living with her. Nina asks if Nelle isn’t getting ahead of herself, but Nelle says, it’s going to happen. As soon as she’s able, she wants to get a house. Something small, but sweet, with a picket fence, and a swing in the front yard. She always wanted that. Nina says, so did she.

Alexis meets Diane at the MetroCourt. She says she’s been looking forward to this all day,  and asks where Max is. Diane says he’s not joining them, and Alexis suggests they get a smaller table, but Diane says they still need a bigger one. Sam approaches the table, and Alexis says Diane set her up. Diane says, damn right she did, and Sam sits down.

Sonny tells Elizabeth that Mike took a fall today. The doctor said it was to be expected. Elizabeth says, that’s true with neurological disorders. Elizabeth asks if Mike is thirsty, and Sonny says he tried giving Mike some water, but he spit it out. Elizabeth asks if she can try. She puts a straw to Mike’s mouth, and asks him to take a sip. He doesn’t, and she says they’ll try again in a little bit. She has an idea, and puts some water on a washcloth. She dabs Mike’s lips with it, and then he sucks on it. She says, nice, right? She asks if he minds if she steals Sonny for a minute, and Sonny says he’ll be right back. They go into the hallway, and she asks when Mike started having a problem with drinking. Sonny says, it’s the first he’s seen Mike do that, but the staff said they were having problems getting him to eat yesterday. He assumed it was all the moving around. She says, people at this stage do better with a routine that’s not disruptive, but it seems to be more than that.

Sam tells Alexis, before she lays into Diane, this was her idea. She asked Diane to be here. Diane asks what Alexis thinks she’s doing, hiding from her daughter? Alexis says she’s not hiding, and that’s an aggressive word. Diane says she’s been with Alexis twice when she let calls from Sam go to voicemail. Alexis says she didn’t think it would be polite to answer, and Diane laughs. She says, complete avoidance. She can’t force Alexis to tell Sam what’s going on, but as Alexis’s bestie, she’s telling her that shutting her daughter out is hurting her, and she’s denying herself the support she desperately needs.

Chase tells Sasha, he can only speak his side; the Willow side. He fell in love with her the minute after he saw her, sitting in her car in the parking garage, in full-on tears. He couldn’t stop staring at her. We flash back to her wildly beeping the horn, and yelling that she’s being robbed, while he tries to tell her that he’s a cop; a detective. She tells him, listen, Sherlock, and threatens to run over him. He says, here’s his shield, showing her, and she asks if he thinks he’s Captain America. Chase tells Sasha, in all the time they’ve spent together, not once did Willow walk into a room and not take his breath away. Sasha asks why Willow was in tears when they met, and he says, she was crying over the baby she’d given up. He didn’t know at the time how fitting it was how they met. As deeply as he’s loved her this entire time, he knew her heart was with that child.

Michael tells Willow, whatever it is, they’ll fix it, but she says she has to tell him what’s going on. She doesn’t want to hurt him, but doesn’t want to lie to him either. He says he’s a big boy, and can handle whatever it is. She says, Chase and Sasha are having an affair. He says, what? He knows they’ve been spending a lot of time together lately, but did she just get that impression, or was there more to it? She says she got that impression when she came home and found them in each other’s arms. Michael wants to be clear, and says, she saw Sasha and Chase together? She says, on the couch, with his shirt off and hers unbuttoned. They weren’t having sex, but they were on their way. She’s sorry. He doesn’t understand. How and when? She says she asked the same thing. He says, and…? she says he’s not going to like the answer.

Diane asks if they’re just going to sit and look at each other. Alexis says, if it’s so important, you tell her. Diane says she’s not telling Sam. That doesn’t fix anything; only confronting it does. Diane starts to get up, but Alexis tells her to sit back down. She set up this half-assed intervention; she’s going to stay for the fallout. Sam asks, what’s going on? and Alexis says she had a drink.

Nina tells Nelle, she wanted a swing when she was little. Nelle says Nina lived in Manhattan, and Nina says that’s why she didn’t get one. Her parents set up an elaborate swing set in the Hamptons. Nelle says, that sounds nice, but Nina says, it’s not what she wanted. What she desired was a simple wood swing hanging from a tree. It’s not about the swing, but what it represents; a family, cozy and happy and loving. It was a fantasy she dreamed up for herself. Nelle says she had the same dream from the other side. They moved a lot to crap rentals, mostly condos. They all have a play area; sunbaked, cracked, and broken, not like what she’d dreamed. She never got her fairytale, so she’s going to make damn sure her son gets his.

Willow says she thinks it’s a combination of things. She’ll start at the beginning, or where she thinks is the beginning. Around Thanksgiving, she thought she was pregnant. It was only for a couple of days, but looking back, Chase had a different reaction than she did. He was wonderful and supportive, talking about someday kids. Michael says, but not today, and Willow says, when they thought it might be a reality, she could tell Chase was freaked out. In a sweet, loving way, but she understands. They hadn’t talked about kids, or even marriage. She thinks Chase was unsettled by it, and didn’t tell her because of the Wiley situation. Now, looking back, she guesses she didn’t notice where he was in life – or wasn’t. He wanted something less complicated, less lifetime commitment. He just wasn’t there. Michael flashes back to telling Sasha that he doesn’t expect her to be instamom, and her saying, obviously Wiley comes first. As for them, they’re good, and they’ll take it as it comes. They’ll figure out the Wiley part later. He tells Willow, Sasha wasn’t there either.  

Chase tells Sasha, by the time Willow realized her baby died, it didn’t matter. Not that it didn’t matter, but… Sasha knows what he means. Willow already loved Wiley, and thought of him as her own. Chase says he thinks Willow could be happy without Wiley, but if Wiley was ever hurting or suffering, and it was within Willow’s power to stop it, he doesn’t think she could live with that. For him, the best way to love her – and he does – is to tell this lie and let her go. Sasha says, what if he’s wrong?

Elizabeth tells Sonny, in cases like Mike’s, his literally memory is fading, but his body is struggling to remember how to work. Has he discussed palliative care with the doctors? Sonny says Mike isn’t ready for end of life care, but she says, it’s more like an extra layer of support. It can easily be done there; Mike doesn’t have to move. They’ll have a team of people, experienced in Mike’s condition. She thinks it would be helpful for all of them. He says, just when you think you’ve got a handle on the disease, it gets worse. She says that’s why she thinks it’s important that both he and Mike have support. They can answer any questions, and talk through the options. He gets the feeling Elizabeth has something specific in mind, and she says she couldn’t help but notice Mike has no DNR in place. At this point, she thinks he needs one.

Sam asks Alexis when this happened, and Alexis says when Sam left the bar, but… Sam says she’s so sorry. She should never have unloaded like that; it’s her fault. Alexis says that’s not the reason she had a drink. There were a lot of things weighing on her mind. It had nothing to do with Sam. Sam asks, what kind of things? and Alexis says, when she was in New York to testify at Neil’s hearing, they slept together. Diane says, what now? and Alexis says, she had sex with Neil. Diane says, she had sex with Neil? and Sam repeats, she had sex with Neil? Sam says, Alexis told her that they had no personal relationship, and Alexis says, when she agreed to testify, they didn’t. Diane says, hypothetically, sneaking around after what was certainly an amazing night with Neil, Alexis was far too wise to go down to the review board. Alexis says that’s exactly what she did; she lied. Sam says, under oath? and Alexis says, yep.

Nina tells Nelle, by no means does she have to stay, but if the copy she’s looking for comes, can Nelle run it to her? She’s meeting Jax at the MetroCourt bar. Nelle says, no problem, and Nina says she was thinking about what Nelle said. She’s sure Nelle and Michael want the same thing. Doesn’t Nelle think there’s some way to have a meeting of the minds? Watching Lulu and Valentin go at it, she can see they’ve lost sight of what’s best for their daughter. Nelle tells her, explain that to Michael. She tried. She’d love nothing more than to co-parent, but when she’s brought it up, she gets a lecture on how evil and toxic she is. He doesn’t see her love for Wiley. All he sees is an endless list of her perceived wrongs. Nina asks if it’s unjustified, and Nelle says she knows she’s made mistakes, but she wants to do and be better for Wiley. Nina is lucky that she can leave the past in the past. Nina says she’s very fortunate. If she can offer one piece of advice… if the opportunity for compromise presents itself, take it. She tells Nelle, don’t work too late, and leaves.

Sasha asks if she and Chase aren’t basically playing God, getting together to steer Willow and Michael, as if they can’t figure it out for themselves and decide what they should do. Chase says he thought they talked about it, and she says she was a 100% willing participant, but now that they’ve actually done it… He says he knows, and Sasha says, what if Michael and Willow blame each other, or end up hating each other, or some other terrible thing happens to make it not work out? Chase asks if she really thinks that’s a possibility, and she says what she thinks is that Michael and Willow are going to get married, because that’s what Wiley needs. She thinks they’ll do their best to be kind and supportive for the sake of the child. And she thinks before Wiley’s third birthday, or maybe sooner, Willow will be madly in love with Michael, and be the happiest woman on the face of the earth. She cries.

Michael tells Willow, everything changed when he found out Wiley was his son. She says, of course (🍷) it did. He says, Wiley came first, and Sasha was incredible about it; caring and supportive. Willow says, but… and he says, she made it clear that she was in no place to be a mom. Willow says, which, like Chase, is understandable. Michael says, she’d put the drama behind her and was on the brink of a new career she was excited about. She didn’t want an instant family, but made it clear nothing had to change. They defined the rules. She was fine with it in theory, but then Nelle showed up. Sasha stepped up, but like Chase, she was telling him what he needed to hear. Playing a part. Not that he was paying attention to what she would have told him, but she could tell Chase.

Elizabeth tells Mike, she’ll visit soon, and hopes today gets better. Mike says, he’s so tired, and she says she’s sure. It’s okay. Close his eyes, and rest. Sonny thanks her for visiting, and she says, of course (🍷). She tells him, think about what she said, and he says he will. They hug, and she leaves. Mike sleeps.

Diane says, all is not lost, and Sam says, it’s not? Diane says, not that she’s ever a fan of perjury, but as long as no one knows, and they were discreet… Alexis says, Britt knows. She saw them at the hotel; she was there the same night. Diane asks how it came up, and Alexis says the night she had the drink, she was trying to reach someone for a ride, and called Julian. He thought she drank because of Neil, and his snitch of a girlfriend told him that she and Neil slept together. Then Julian took it upon himself to attack Neil at the hospital, screaming at the top of his lungs that they’d slept together. Diane says, it gets better, and Alexis says, it’s out. Diane asks if Neil has heard from the medical review board, but Alexis says, not that she knows of. Diane says, hopefully, it will just go away, but she’s asking Alexis, please, go to a meeting and work on her sobriety. She thinks it’s going to be a bumpy night ahead. Alexis says, good idea, and Sam says she’ll drive. Alexis thanks Diane for being her good friend. Diane says, her pleasure, but let’s not ever do this again.

Michael says, he was so fixated on Wiley’s medical crisis. Willow says he doesn’t know the half of it. She didn’t tell him, she was so crazed went charging to Nina’s office, asking her to run an article in Crimson about how toxic Nelle is. She thinks Chase and Sasha are genuinely trying to be supportive, but Michael says, that’s got nothing to do with where Sasha and Chase were. Willow says, Chase isn’t grieving a child, like she is, and Sasha isn’t an overnight parent, like Michael. They’re onlookers, and the only people they could turn to were each other. Michael says, he can see it. They felt hurt, mad, frustrated, and one or both of them had too many drinks. Willow is sure once it started, it was something between them that they shared, that she and Michael couldn’t understand. He says, there are a million better ways to handle it than they did. He tells Willow, come on, and she asks where they’re going. He says she can’t go back to Chase. He’ll arrange a room at the MetroCourt. She says she should say no, and Michael says, they can’t be the friends who say what the other should hear. They’re not like Chase and Sasha. They say what they mean. She thanks him, and they leave.

Sasha tells Chase, she doesn’t think she realized how much she loved Michael until now. She was happy and things were great, but now that it’s over, he means more to her than she realized. Chase asks if she regrets it, but she says, no. She’s going to miss him though. Chase says she didn’t understand how much she loved Michael until now, but he knew how much he loved Willow all along. Sasha asks, which is worse? and he says he honestly doesn’t know.

Nina waits at the MetroCourt, and Willow approaches. She asks if Willow is okay, and Willow says she is, but Nina asks if she’s sure. Willow says she doesn’t know if Nina remembers, but when Willow asked about publishing an article about Nelle, Nina pointed out something. That it wasn’t her place to arrange Michael’s defense; she’s too close. The custody fight isn’t hers. Nina was right. Just not in the way she thought.

The doorknob on Chase’s apartment jiggles, and Michael tells Chase, open the door. Chase asks if Sasha is ready for this, and she says, no. He lets Michael in, and Michael sees Sasha. He says, wow. He didn’t think she’d still be there. He thought he’d talk to Chase, but now he can kill two birds with one stone. Just one question. Chase says, just one? and Michael says he’ll start with this one. How long this been going on?

Nelle looks through the files on Nelle’s desk, and moves the necklace out of the way. She finds the papers she wants, and leaves with it, not noticing what’s in the jewelry box.

Mike looks at Sonny, and Sonny asks how he’s feeling. He didn’t eat yesterday, so Sonny had something sent over, a surprise. Olivia’s manicotti. He tells Mike to smell it, and Mike closes his eyes, and sniffs. Sonny says, smells amazing, right? Don’t tell Olivia, but he thinks it’s almost as good as his. Mike says, almost. Sonny asks if he’ll have a bite to eat. Just one bite; nothing crazy.

Sonny opens the manicotti, and says it reminds him of the old neighborhood. Mike will love it. He holds out a spoonful, but Mike doesn’t respond. Sonny says, he’s got to eat. Please. Mike looks at him, and sniffs it. He says, smells like home, and Sonny says, it does smell like home. Here you go. He puts the spoon in Mike’s mouth.

Nina asks Willow how she’s right, and Willow says, never mind. She shouldn’t be talking about this. She’s so all over the place. Nina says her track record with Willow isn’t great, and she’s not trying to pry, but clearly something is bothering her. So if there’s anything Nina can do, even just listen. Does Willow want her to call Chase? Willow says, Chase is the last person she should call. Nina asks, why? and Willow says, because she just found out Chase and Sasha are having an affair. Nelle overhears.

Sasha tells Michael, she and Chase ran into each other at The Floating Rib when Michael was meeting Diane, and decided to grab a drink. Michael says he has a feeling they grabbed more than that, and she says they were feeling shut out and commiserating. They didn’t want to hurt Michael or Willow, but didn’t know how to tell them. Michael says he’s sorry he didn’t pick up on the cues. Sasha says it was wrong, but she can’t stand watching him hate her. She leaves, and Chase says, however bad they screwed up, it’s not that they didn’t care. Michael says, that’s for them to deal with, but how the hell could he do that to Willow? He’s heartbroken, and it kills him that Sasha would do that to him; that Chase would do that. But he’ll survive. He’s been through worse, but Willow is different. She believed in Chase as much as anyone could believe in someone. She trusted him with her heart, and deserves better. He destroyed something precious. He says he knows he contributed too. He leaned too hard and too often on Willow, but he’d never treat her the way Chase did, and he’s going to make damn sure it never happens again. He pushes Chase, and walks out. When he’s gone, Chase cries.

Tomorrow, Alexis asks Neil what’s next for them, Jordan has a good idea what Cyrus is planning, Laura tells Cyrus that she’s done all her homework on him, and Sonny asks Carly if she wants him to just let his father die.

🤽🏼‍♂️ About Summer House – I know, I know. I always only give one comment about this show, that the people are still awful. BTW, they still are. The guys are sleazeballs, and the girls are idiots. It’s not that I forget how awful they are, and watch it again, as I’ve done with other shows, like any incarnation of Jersey Shore, or Real World in its later years. A span of time would go by, and I’d forget why I stopped watching. Then I’d watch again, remember why I stopped watching, and stop watching again. This is different though. I guess I have some kind of horrible fascination with this show. Or maybe I want to be sure if I ever need an investment banker, or whatever it is they do, it isn’t one of them. Although they seem interchangeable. There’s a Kyle and Carl, which doesn’t help, and Kyle – at least I think it’s Kyle – has a doppelganger this season. Are they brothers? I don’t pay enough attention to know. I also constantly wonder, how is it at their age (mostly mid-30s), they’re still summering together in the Hamptons, and acting like it’s Delta house? Is this some weird latent extension of college life? What is this?

https://www.distractify.com/p/how-old-is-cast-of-summer-house

💎 Still on the fence about giving The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills my full attention. I’ll never forgive them for driving LVP away, but I can’t wait for Brandi to screw her friend (literally and figuratively) over. Sadly, it has to be Denise, who I’ve loved since It’s Complicated. I wasn’t pleased with her minor involvement with taking LVP down, last season, but she seems like a decent person. I was also disappointed that she had a friendship with Brandi, but there you go. That went well. I wouldn’t trust that one as far as I could throw the amount of fillers pumped into her face.

Dorit has a new house; 9,000 square feet. We found out it was only in her name, which she seemed to think was common. I assume they’re talking about the mortgage, not the deed, which probably means they used only her credit score, alluding to PK’s bankruptcy. There was a lot of blah-blah-blah lawsuit, and an interviewer trying to ask her questions about it at an event. In an odd change of format, during interviews, we heard the producers asking the questions. While they do that once in a while, we don’t normally hear that side of the script. Maybe they’re trying to put a new spin on it? Garcelle also got a new house, a measly 3200 square feet. We got a little background on Garcelle, who’d thought ex-husband Mike was her last stop. Instead, she found out he’d been having an affair for the past five years.

LisaR’s Amelia was in NYC going to the New School, but having panic attacks and anxiety. She’d posted on Instagram about having a fear of growing up. Teddi said she’d reached out to Amelia, but maybe LisaR’s kids shouldn’t be so open on their social media. Truth! Teddi also invited the women on a retreat, a day and a half of health and fitness fun. In her usual way of begging for people to come, she kept saying she didn’t give a flying if they came or not. Erika said it was a disaster waiting to happen, and I tend to agree. In her interviews, Erika talked about Tom being older, and said she was tired of justifying her twenty-year marriage. She also got her Actor’s Equity contract to play Roxie Hart in Chicago on Broadway. There were some tender moments between her and Tom, and it’s clear she really loves and is thankful for him. She said, the same girl who worked at Shakers was now on Broadway, and actually seemed like a human being in this episode.

Kyle had dinner with Sutton, who I’m not sure about. She told Kyle that she felt like Rumpelstiltskin because she’d just woken up, mixing up her fairytales or legends or whatever, since that’s Rip van Winkle. I guess she never watched Once Upon a Time either. Charlie Sheen filed papers with the court, saying he didn’t want to pay Denise child support, even though he hadn’t paid in forever, and she’d never said a word. Denise also had some serious surgery. A hernia that turned into four hernias, and a six-hour operation, instead of the one and a half she’d been told. She figured the injury was most likely from lifting her special needs child, but she came through fine, albeit in pain. LisaR’s advice: take the pills. Sutton also opened her own boutique, something she’d wanted to do for a long time. The women were in attendance, except for Denise, who was still recovering. In Sutton’s interview, she said she didn’t need to make money, but thought it would be cool if she did. The mayor of WeHo made a speech, and Sutton griped to him about her parking tickets. Because, why not? Teddi carried on about how their coming to the retreat wouldn’t affect her, and I thought it would serve her right if none of them showed up.

Next time, Teddi tries to be chill, and people are following Aaron and Denise

🐪 You Are Here…

How long has it been now? A year? Two? What do you mean, it’s more like a month? You’ve made it this far, you’ll get there. This isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon, or some athletic metaphor. In the meantime, stay safe, stay home, and stay out of trouble, whatever that means to you.

April 21, 2020 – Jason Cancels the Meeting, the Witches Launch a Potion, Alex’s Secret Is Out & Queen Prophecy

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Well, I was here on time, but ABC wasn’t. The governor was talking, and the finally showed an alternate channel. Once again, I scramble for the remote. I didn’t miss much. The main thing is Willow walking in on Sasha and Chase. Sasha has apparently jetted to the bedroom while Willow confronts her boyfriend. Cyrus has also come into Charlie’s.

At the Metro Court, Lulu tells Laura, Charlotte doesn’t see Valentin for who he is or what he does.

Valentin asks Charlotte if she knows what exaggeration is. She says, it’s kind of a lie, and Valentin says he doesn’t care for Ava, but it would be an exaggeration to say she was his enemy. She says it’s not what he said; it’s what he did.

Josslyn walks into the hospital, and Michael asks what she’s doing there. She says, Tony brought her after volleyball practice. She heard Wiley has to stay another night, so she brought Michael a snack that’s healthy and nutritious. She hands him a smoothie, and says, it’s blueberries with a protein boost. He asks if she’s sure; she likes to add things like seaweed. She swears it’s just fresh fruit and almond milk, and he says he’s trusting her. He takes a sip, and says, it’s good. She says she’s also there to show her support, and asks if he’s nervous about the custody hearing. He asks if she wants the truth, and she says, no, cover for her, like he did when she was little. He says he feels like he made a big mistake. He pushed Diane for an early hearing date. Now he wishes he’d put it off as long as possible.

Chase tells Willow, no one was supposed to get hurt. She doesn’t know what to say, and he says, sorry. Does she think he wanted that to happen? She asks why it did, and he says it was supposed to be them in love. None of this was supposed to happen. She asks how it did then. How did it go from two people so in love? He says it was two people in love, and then it was him in love with her, and her totally focused on Wiley.

Michael says he’s freaked out, and Josslyn says, Wiley just had surgery, but he says he’s still freaked out. Josslyn says it was terrifying, but Wiley got through it fine. Michael says that’s because their mom forged Nelle’s signature, and locked Nelle on the roof. She says, go, mom, and he asks if she would have done the same. She says, of course (🍷). Wiley needed the surgery to be more comfortable, and to improve his quality of life. The doctors also got a more accurate picture of his prognosis. A night on the roof is kinder than Nelle deserves. He asks if it ever scares Josslyn how much she’s like their mom, and she says he’s scarier than the both of them put together. She and Carly react in the moment, and think on their feet. They take big, and seemingly stupid, chances; sometimes they pay off, sometimes they don’t. They’re improvisors, but he thinks in advance. He convinces people that he’s a pushover, while he finds their weak spots, and plans a strategy. He says, what good is a strategy if he can’t follow it? and she asks what strategy he’s talking about.

Carly tells Jason, he needs to make the meeting, but Jason says Sonny wants him there. She says the place is like a fortress. Him being there won’t make a difference, and Sonny can’t think straight right now. He says, all the more reason to do what Sonny wants.

Cyrus tells Julian, Charlie’s is a quaint place; it has personality and charm. Julian says the previous owner had no sense of character, and Cyrus says he heard Charlie was a character himself; a bit of a player. Julian says he wouldn’t know, and Cyrus is surprised. He was under the impression that Charlie and Julian were in the same business. Julian’s reputation precedes him. Julian says, as does Cyrus’s. He’s heard a lot about Cyrus. Cyrus says, then Julian knows he was exonerated. Julian says he read the evidence was fabricated, but he didn’t read the word exoneration. Cyrus says, fake news, and Julian says he’s sure Cyrus is well aware he was in the media game. Fake news is a very specific thing, not just a story where the facts aren’t straight, and it’s not a lie. It’s disinformation created to cause outrage and skew public opinion. Is Cyrus saying he’s the target of a smear campaign? Cyrus says, it’s quite a burden to carry the weight of falsehood brought about by another. Julian says he knows all about that.

Laura says she thought Lulu was going to have an open mind when she encouraged Valentin to visit. Lulu says she already regrets it. She can’t ask Valentin to leave or Charlotte will be upset. Laura says Lulu has to practice tolerance, but Lulu says, it has its limits. She gave Maxie her blessing about working at Deception, but Maxie would have convinced herself it would work out even if Valentin threatened to bring back poodle skirts. I fail to see how that’s a bad thing, but okay. Laura says, Valentin is part of Maxie’s life and Lulu has accepted it. Does she think she can do the same thing with Charlotte?

Valentin asks what Charlotte thinks he did, but she doesn’t want to talk about it. He says she obviously thinks he did a bad thing, and she says she saw him. He says, saw him what? and she says she saw what he did to Ava. She saw him push Ava off the roof.

Laura asks Lulu to discuss the situation. The arrangement they have is working for Charlotte. Lulu says, it’s not working for her. Valentin shot Nikolas. He survived, but it was no thanks to Valentin. Valentin is a liar and a manipulator, and spoils Charlotte rotten. He indulges Charlotte’s worse impulses. She doesn’t understand why Laura is advocating for him. Laura says, she’s not, and Lulu knows it. Lulu asks what she calls it then, and Laura says she’d call it advocating for Charlotte.

Valentin doesn’t know what Charlotte thought she saw, but she’s mistaken. She tells him, don’t lie to her. She came outside to show her mommy the moon, and saw Ava. She saw him grab Ava’s arm. Ava backed up, he pushed her, and she fell. Valentin asks why she didn’t say something before, and she says she didn’t want him to worry. She didn’t want to let it get in the way of his happily ever after. They deserve to be together. She, Valentin, and Nina deserve to be a family.

Willow asks Chase how this is about Wiley. When they thought Willow was pregnant, they talked about what they would mean, and he said he’d support her. She thought they were on the same page. He says, practically every waking moment, she’s consumed with one baby thing or another. She can’t let it go. She got on the train, the train left the station, and she didn’t even realize he got left behind.

Carly tells Jason that he has to meet with Cyrus, but he tells her, Sonny said wait, so he’s going to. Carly says, it’s obviously an important meeting, but Sonny thinks Mike is more important. Sonny is grieving Mike, and navigating a difficult situation. He doesn’t have the emotional bandwidth to handle Cyrus on top of it. It’s up to Jason

Cyrus says he sorry he and Julian didn’t meet until now, and Julian says, prison is a bitch on your social life. Cyrus laughs, and says he’s out now. They should get to know each other. Maybe it’s an opportunity for collaboration. Julian says he’s got his hands full with Charlie’s, and Cyrus suggests a fellowship then. He could use Julian as a guide in Port Charles, and learn the ins and outs. Julian says he bets Sonny could give Cyrus a crash course. Cyrus laughs again. His phone rings. It’s Jason, who says, the meeting is off.

At Turning Woods, Brook tells Sonny, she brought meatballs, but Mike isn’t doing well. Sonny says, Mike had a seizure. He hasn’t spoken to the doctor yet, but he wants to see Mike. He looks in, and Mike is lying in bed, half-sleeping. The doctor comes by, and Sonny says he was told on the phone, it was a seizure, but are they sure it wasn’t a fall? Maybe Mike tried get up. The doctor says, Mike was seated. It was movie night, and Mike was watching the film. He was seated when it happened. An aide witnessed the episode, and his accounting lines up with a seizure. Sonny asks how bad it is, and the doctor says, Mike was knocked around, but there’s no permanent damage. Sonny says Mike never had a seizure before, and has no history of them, but the doctor says it’s a neurological effect that’s linked with late stage Alzheimer’s. Sonny asks what the tests say, and the doctor says they haven’t done any. Sonny wonders what they’re waiting for, and the doctor says, it might be difficult. Sonny says, it’s just a scan, but the doctor says there’s prep, and the machinery might be off-putting to Mike. Sonny asks if he’s saying it’s too much trouble, and Brook says, he’s saying the test might upset Mike. The doctor says they can treat the symptoms, but identification might not improve Mike’s quality of life. Sonny says, the life Mike has left, and Brook says she doesn’t think that’s what he meant. Sonny wants to see Mike for himself.

Sonny goes into Mike’s room, where a machine monitors his vitals. Sonny says, it’s him. Mike is going to be okay. Sonny is here, and he’s not going anywhere.

Cyrus says, how disappointing. He was looking forward to breaking bread with Sonny. He’s gone to so much trouble to set up the meeting. Jason says, plans change, and Cyrus says Jason isn’t suggesting their gathering lacks importance. It’s coming across as more than disrespectful. Jason says he’s just the messenger. The meeting is off. Cyrus says, tell Sonny he doesn’t appreciate… Hello? Julian asks if Cyrus would like something stronger.

Carly says Jason just hung up on Sonny’s rival. That could start a war. Jason says, he wouldn’t stop talking. Carly says there’s a better way to handle it, and he knows it. She walks out of the kitchen.

Lulu asks Laura why she’s even considering the idea that Valentin is worthy of a place in Charlotte’s life. Laura says, it’s not about worthiness. It’s a statement of fact that Valentin is Charlotte’s father, and was her sole parent for her first five years. There’s no way he can be ripped away without causing major emotional damage. Lulu says, because Charlotte loves him, and Laura says, yes. Lulu says, dogs love chocolate, but eating it kills them, which is just a bad example. Laura says, compromise is the right way to go, and Lulu asks why she should compromise with Valentin. Laura says, for starters, it looks like he’s changed for the better since he found out he’s Helena’s son. Lulu doesn’t know how to react. Now Valentin is a different kind of evil? Laura asks if she has to remind Lulu that she held a gun on Valentin, and Lulu says she wishes she was talking to that version of her mother. Laura says, she absolutely is. Valentin appears to have changed for the better. Lulu says, the bar for the most improved Cassadine is set really low, and Laura suggests Lulu take a look at her daughter. She’s been separated from her father for a month, but shows no signs of acclimating. Lulu is sorry if Charlotte doesn’t like it, but if keeping her from Valentin lessens the chance of Charlotte being kidnapped, what is she going to do? Laura asks what Lulu is going to do when Charlotte gets older and resents her, or worse? Lulu says she’d rather that than Charlotte not grow up at all.

Valentin tells Charlotte, he lost his temper, and did a terrible thing he never should have done. Charlotte says, Ava is mean and on Nikolas’s side, but Valentin says that doesn’t excuse what he did. She says, it does to her. Ava just got wet. You don’t die in the harbor in winter. Charlotte didn’t. Valentin says Charlotte should never have been involved; he’s sorry. She says, it’s not his fault. It’s Nikolas and Ava’s fault, and Sasha’s for lying, and mommy too. Lulu doesn’t like him, and didn’t want him happy with Nina. He’s going to fix it, right? He’s going to find a way to get Windymere back, and make Nina love him. Then they’ll have their happily ever after.

Michael tells Josslyn, Diane thinks he’d have a better chance for full custody if he was married to the right person. She asks if Diane has someone specific in mind, and he says, Willow. Josslyn can see that. Willow is great with Wiley. She’s generous and kind, and not fake like Nelle. And she’s beautiful. Not that it’s a major consideration, but it helps. Michael agrees, and Josslyn says, plus she already loves Wiley. Michael doubts Willow would care Wiley isn’t her biological son, and Josslyn says Avery isn’t their mom’s biological child, but Carly doesn’t love her any less. He’s not Sonny’s biological son, but it doesn’t make a difference. Michael says she’s right. Willow loves Wiley as much as when she thought he was her own. Josslyn asks, then what’s the problem?

Willow says, if Chase thought they wanted different things, he should have said so. He says he wasn’t going to ask her to stop loving Wiley or looking out for him. He just wanted a middle ground; some distance. But she couldn’t do it. She says, so instead of being honest, he had sex with Sasha? He says, actually it turns out they have a lot in common. They’re both on the sidelines of other people’s grief. She says she’s sorry her and Michael’s grief is inconvenient for them, and he says she just proved his point. Nothing they do is good enough; they’re always on the outside. It’s painfully obvious. She says, so he was going to keep cheating indefinitely? He asks what good it would have done to tell her. It just would have hurt her. She says it would have given them a fighting chance. In telling her right away, she would have been hurt and angry, but she would have understood. They could have chalked it up to a mistake, and fought through it, but he didn’t give them a shot. Now, it’s too late. He says she’s right. Maybe he should have done it differently, but he didn’t. Willow says, now, it’s over. Never in a million years did she think this could happen; that he’d do this. When he said he loved her, she thought he meant forever. He says he thought so too, and she guesses she didn’t know him at all. She takes her bag, and walks out. She cries in the hallway. Sasha quietly comes out of the bedroom. Chase smashes a glass against the wall, and says, dammit!

Lulu says she doesn’t know what sob story Valentin gave Laura, but it must have been a doozy. Laura says, give her some credit. Does Lulu think she can’t recognize a crisis of conscience, especially when Valentin comes crawling to her for help? She thinks that says something significant. Lulu thinks it says he’s desperate and on the run; willing to say anything to keep Charlotte in his life. His words don’t cut it. Valentin approaches them with Charlotte, and thanks Lulu for the visit. He asks if he can borrow Laura for a second. They walk into the hallway, and Lulu asks how Charlotte’s chat with her dad went. Charlotte says she thinks her papa is mad at her.

Laura tells Valentin, make it fast. Their little chats aren’t going over well with Lulu.

Mike wakes up, and Sonny asks how he’s feeling. He’s back in his room. He had some trouble on movie night, but everything is okay. Mike struggles, and Sonny tells him not to move. He asks if Mike wants to go for a walk, and get some fresh air. Mike tries to get up again, and Sonny deduces Mike has to go to the bathroom, and helps him out of bed, saying he’ll get a wheelchair. Brook asks if everything is okay, and Sonny asks her to get a nurse to help him to the chair.

Carly brings Donna into the kitchen. She says Donna is like her mother. She’s concluded Uncle Jason won’t listen to reason. Jason takes the baby, and says her mom just wants things done her way. Carly says, what Donna needs to understand, is that her Uncle Jason never listens to her about business, even though she’s right more than she’s not. Jason says her mom just wants to keep everybody safe. It’s all he wants too. They just disagree on how to make that happen.

Josslyn says if Michael and Willow both love Wiley – which they do – and getting married will keep Wiley safe from Nelle – which it will – why not go for it? Michael says he’s in love with Sasha for starters. Josslyn says, Sasha is totally cool. If he tells her, Josslyn is sure she’d be on board. He says he has and she is, but Willow isn’t. She’s in love with Chase, and he can’t ask her to end things to be with him indefinitely. She says, why doesn’t he ask Willow, and let her decide, but Michael says, it’s not fair to make her choose between helping Wiley and staying with the man she loves. He can’t do that to her.

Sasha asks Chase, what have we done?

Valentin says Laura despises him, and she says, for the most part. He says, nevertheless, she sticks by Charlotte, and knows what Charlotte needs. Laura hopes so, and he says she’s a good person. Charlotte needs her to learn right from wrong; she’s a steadying force. Laura says she’s tried to provide that all along. He tells her, what he’s trying to say is that Charlotte needs her to teach her to good. Clearly, he can’t do that.

Lulu tells Charlotte, whatever is going on, she’s sure Charlotte’s papa could never be mad at her. Charlotte says she doesn’t mean that, and Lulu says, of course (🍷) she does. Charlottes says, Lulu is always saying, tell the truth, but she doesn’t. She pretends to like Valentin, and when she thinks Charlotte can’t hear, she says how bad he is.

Julian gives Cyrus a drink on the house. Cyrus says, much obliged. Now that his evening has been freed up, and it appears to be between dinner and the late night rush, they should take the opportunity to become better acquainted.

Jason tells Donna, her mom is the smartest person he knows. Carly says he doesn’t mean that, but he says he does. He tells Donna, she has great instincts, and she’s ready to fight for the people she loves, but sometimes she doesn’t stop to think things through. If he ignores what her dad wants, and goes behind his back, it could be tougher for her dad, since he’s dealing with so much. He wants to give her dad what he needs, and knows that’s what her mom wants too.

Sonny thanks Brook for the assist, and she says, anything for her two best guys. Sonny asks if Mike heard that, but Brook tells Mike, save his voice for their duet. She thinks they should close the Nurses Ball. Sonny brings a cup of water to Mike’s lips. Mike sips it, and coughs. Sonny wipes Mike’s mouth, and tells Brook, it’s late. She should probably go. She says she has nowhere to be, and she’s happy to keep them company, but Sonny says he’s about to head out, and his dad is tired. Mike asks Sonny, is it over?

Lulu tells Charlotte, she and Charlotte’s dad disagree on a lot of things, but they both love her so much. Charlotte says she’s doing it again; pretending she likes him. Don’t pretend things are okay when they’re not. Pretending doesn’t help. It makes everything worse.

Laura says she never heard Valentin call his parenting skills into question. He says he doesn’t want to overthink it. Just promise she’ll take care of his daughter; instill in her conscience, generosity, and kindness. Will she do that? Laura says, of course (🍷) she will, and Valentin tells her, what he’s saying is, if Lulu decides to go ahead and petition the court for full custody, he’s not contesting it. Take care. He walks away, and Laura stands there with her mouth open.

Sonny tells Mike, he doesn’t understand, and Mike repeats, is it over? Sonny asks, is what over? The movie? Mike says, he means this whole thing, and Sonny says, the movie ended. He’s going to find out what movie it was, and have a private screening; just them. He’ll be right back. He sees Brook in the hallway, and says his dad gets like that. He kind of rolls with it. Brook says, Sonny doesn’t think Mike was talking about anything specific? Sonny says, no. He was just wondering… what movie it was.

Jason gives Donna back to Carly, who tells Donna to feel privileged. Jason doesn’t talk to anyone, and he was talking up a storm. He says he talks tell her, and she says, something else about her Uncle Jason. He’s not much of a talker, but he’s an incredible listener. He’s patient, and doesn’t judge. He’s incredibly loyal, and even when they disagree, and she doesn’t take his advice and does the opposite, when it blows up in her face, he always stands by her side. He’ll stand by Donna’s too. She knows Donna is going to be a perfect angel, and never break the rules or be defiant. Carly knows Donna would never do anything wrong, but in case she does, her Uncle Jason will always have her back. Jason says, like her mom has his.

Josslyn tells Michael, Wiley is so cute, how he falls asleep pulling his ear. He says she did the same thing; he looks like her. She says, it’s so weird. No one noticed the family resemblance; now you can’t miss it. He says they saw what they expected to see. That’s the worst thing about the custody hearing; the judge seeing what he expects. A poor mother separated from her child who deserves another chance. Josslyn says, he’ll see the facts too. Nelle’s file will be the first thing he sees, and there will be no contest. She pleaded guilty to murdering her fiancé. He says he has Claudia, but she says there was an infant involved, and he changed his life. Nelle didn’t. She tried to kill Michael the night Wiley was born, and that was only a year and a half ago. The facts are the facts, and they say he’s a way better parent. He says, maybe Diane should consult with her. She still thinks him marrying Willow would make a stronger case, but she wants Chase. She tells him not to waste his time wishing things were different. The way things are, are totally on his side. When it comes to the actual testimony, he’ll blow Nelle out of the water. Nelle is fake, and Willow is real, but he’s real too. He loves Wiley and wants what’s best for him, and that honesty rolls off him in waves. Him, plus the facts, are all the judge needs to make a right decision. He says, maybe she’s right. Maybe he didn’t need to drag Willow in to it after all.

Chase picks up the bottle, and tells Sasha, he got this from wine guy. He and Willow were supposed to have it tonight. They were doing this thing where they were learning and exploring different types of wine. He pours them both a glass, and says, now that that’s over, how about toast? She asks, to what? and he says, to hopefully, this all being worth it.

Tomorrow, Diane admits she set Alexis up, Willow tells Michael that Chase and Sasha are having an affair, and Sonny has the feeling Elizabeth has something specific in mind.

Vanderpump Rules

Bartending educator Cole gives SUR’s newer staff a lesson. In Dayna’s interview, she says, bartenders make more money than servers. Her mom was a bartender for thirty years, and she learned how to make a dirty martini when she was eight. It’s in her blood. Brett tells her that Max hooked up with a cocktail waitress at Lisa’s restaurant in Vegas. In her interview, Dayna says she thought absence made the heart grow fonder, but in Max’s case, it makes his d*ck grow harder.

Stassi combs her hair extensions. Beau puts on bangs, and says he’s Sia. Schwartz and Katie come by. Schwartz says he wouldn’t change one moment in Vegas, but Katie says she’d change one. In Schwartz’s interview, he says, they’re married. The paperwork was registered… In Katie’s interview, she says, there’s no proof. Schwartz says, you’d think after the first time, he’d have held onto the document, but he lost it again. Stassi says she’s done waiting for Beau’s ass to take the next step, so she’s going on her own to her GYN appointment. She wants to make sure everything is working. Katie asks if they’re trying to make a baby, and Stassi says they’re not not trying. In her interview, Stassi says she knows ten years from now, she and Beau will be married and have children. Going to an all-girls Catholic school made her realize the way she doesn’t want to live. No sex before marriage, and definitely not a baby. She wants to take the next step, whenever it is. Katie thought they had the perfect crew in Vegas. No slight to Kristen… Stassi says, she didn’t have to worry about Kristen overstepping boundaries. Kristen was pissed because Beau said Stassi was his number one priority. It triggers her from when Kristen hooked up with Jax. She lied for a long time. Beau says he’s still friends with her, but as a group, his priority is going to be Stassi. In Beau’s interview, he says he doesn’t want Stassi to be upset or uncomfortable. He wishes they could work things out. Schwartz says, unfortunately, they have a wine event tomorrow, and Katie says, the whole situation is unfortunate. Stassi no longer wants to do the wine business. Stassi says her heart hasn’t been in it for a while. In Stassi’s interview, she says they’re throwing a Witches of WeHo party to launch their Potion No. 2. If they were Destiney’s Child, she’s Beyonce, and she’s ready to leave. Katie says, it should be fine. Kristen picked up all the decorations; the banners, the cauldrons, and dry ice. It’s going to be fun; witchy pretty.

Kristen gets everything together. She says she’s proud of the brand they built. She did it with Katie and Stassi, from the ground up. But now, it’s all on her.

Dayna and Brett go to work. Puffy! Lisa comes in, and Peter grills Brett on mojitos. Lisa orders one goat cheese ball, since she’s going out to dinner. Peter gets it for her, but when he brings it over, she says, when she said one, she meant three. They must be amazing. I know Stassi is addicted to them. Scheana sits with Lisa, and Lisa asks if she doesn’t have any tables waiting. Scheana says she just clocked in, and wanted to speak to Lisa before she got tables. In other words, she wanted to be paid for the time it took to talk to Lisa. She tells Lisa that she had her egg retrieval surgery, and got seven. Lisa says, so she’s waiting for the right guy or time. Peter is a faithful old dog. Scheana says she doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now. She’s having too much fun being single. Lisa thinks Scheana wants a relationship more than anything. Sometimes Lisa feels like they don’t get the true story with Scheana. In Scheana’s interview, she says, for a while, she said it didn’t bother her if a relationship ended; it only led to the next one. But at the end of the day, all of them hurt her, and screwed with her head and heart. Lisa asks, about Max… and Scheana says, he hooked up with baby Scheana over the weekend. She knows he has a type. Lisa says the only thing that matters is if Scheana feels hurt, but Scheana says the only way Max could hurt her would be by not being a good friend. He and Brett didn’t check on her after her surgery. In Lisa’s interview, she says, Scheana needs to know, you can’t expect that level of thoughtfulness from men who aren’t your husband, and you can’t expect that level of thoughtfulness from a man who is your husband. Peter suggests Scheana get to work, and Scheana says Lisa was trying to give her Peter’s sperm. Lisa says they’ve been floating around SUR for ten years.

Scheana visits Dayna, who says she has a new houseguest. We see a fish in a plastic container, and she says, it’s not going well. Maybe put it in a tank? Scheana shows Dayna her knee injury, and in Scheana’s interview she says she was enjoying her Sunday, and a guy came full speed into her on a scooter. She tells Dayna that she’s not supposed to be active for a while, and can’t go to Nightingale. She asks about Dayna’s birthday, and Dayna says, it was great. She had a moment about her mom. She put on Beatles records, and cried in the kitchen, then ate mac and cheese and hotdogs. Scheana says she hired a psychic as a birthday present for Dayna. She’d connected Scheana with her grandmother, and Scheana thought Dayna could connect with her mother. Dayna says, that’s a lot to spring on her. Scheana hasn’t lost a parent. Dayna tears up, and Scheana says, her mom has lost a parent, like that’s the same thing. In her interview, Scheana says she’s a gift giver. It’s her favorite part of Christmas. She wanted to bring Dayna a minute of happiness, and thought she could hear that her mom is proud of her. Scheana says her psychic can do it today, and Dayna says, is she here now? Scheana says, no. She just texted, and Scheana said she’d have to talk to Dayna first. Dayna says she’s sorry, but she can’t do it. In Dayna’s interview, she says she believes in psychics and communicating with the dead, but her mother’s death was the most traumatic thing in her life, and she’d want good energy and to be open to it. Scheana is a friend, but Dayna isn’t sharing intimate moments with her. Scheana dashes outside to tell psychic Shauna, it was too heavy of a surprise. Dayna wasn’t expecting it. Dayna hears them talking, and looks out. Shauna says Dayna can always call. Dayna goes downstairs, and calls Scheana over. She says it seems like Scheana was trying to spring this on her, but Scheana, who can never help but dig a hole deeper, says she just wanted Shauna to be available in case Dayna wanted to do it. Dayna asks if Shauna was supposed to be there; Scheana didn’t tell her Shauna was waiting. In her interview, Dayna says a good psychic could figure out the address, and what time. Scheana says maybe she should have talked to Dayna first. She leaves, and Dayna shakes her head.

Beau goes to Villa Rosa. Giggy! Puffy! He tells Lisa, he’s a wreck inside. He wants everything to be perfect. She asks what part of proposing in a graveyard wouldn’t be perfect? She’s offered him the patio for a light dinner afterwards, and champagne. In his interview, he says, have you seen this place? It’s friggin’ awesome. He’s going to surprise Stassi with the engagement, then surprise her with Lisa’s house. The others will be there too. Lisa says Stassi is going to be so excited and happy. Beau caught her at a good time in her life.

We join Stassi at her GYN appointment. Everything is normal. In her interview, she says she was never so happy to be called normal. She tells the doctor that he’s making pregnancy fun.

Lisa asks if Beau’s not inviting Kristen, but he doesn’t know. Lisa says naturally, the inclination is to not have her there, but she’s been an integral part of Stassi’s development. We flash back to the earlier years, and Lisa says they don’t want to look back and regret that she wasn’t there in a moment that can’t be recreated. Beau says he’ll see how the vibe is, and Lisa says, it’s a long table.

James, Raquel, Brett, Dayna, and Charli go to a club. In Charli’s interview, she says she doesn’t want to date Brett. He seems like he’d cry after sex, and get emotional. Brett asks James how it is being at the club sober. James says, it’s a different experience, since he’s been there before. Brett asks if it’s hard not drinking, but James says it’s making him stronger. In James’s interview, he says he would drink to reach an impossible destination. He asks Brett what’s happening with Dayna. Brett says, she’s a cool-ass girl, and James says they have great chemistry. In Brett’s interview, he says, it’s no secret he’s into Dayna. Now that Max was sinning in Sin City, there’s only one thing standing in the way. He has no idea why Danica wants to sabotage his situation. Usually, he’s the guy people want to set up with a friend because he’s a good guy. He asks to talk to Danica, and they step outside the crowd. He says she’s been talking to Dayna, telling her sh*t. She wonders why he’d be interested in hooking up with someone who’s hooked up with his friend. In Brett’s interview, he says, where he comes from, this is okay. A producer asks where he’s from, and he says, Jersey. I’m not sure what the big deal is. She’s not dating both of them at the same time. It’s like how on Below Deck Sailing Yacht, Adam is jealous because Jenna dated the same guy one of the other girls had dated a million years ago. It’s silly. Dayna joins them, and tells them about Scheana hiring the psychic, and how Scheana said she wasn’t there, but she was. Danica says, Scheana says one thing, but does another. She’s so worried about coming off a certain way. In her interview, Dayna says, Scheana lies all the time. She’s not honest. That’s how Brett felt about her too. She tells Danica, if you’re worried how the truth makes you look, you’re lying. Scheana makes people not like her. Brett asks if they can stop talking about her.

Lala and James meet at the studio, where music producer Sean2 is waiting. James is excited, and they make some new music. James says, it’s so Kanye. They take a break, and Lala says James sounds better. He says he’s made more music in the last month, than in the last six months. She says he seems happy, and he says he’s living his life. He realizes drinking was holding him back. She says she likes the way he’s talking. Now that he’s involved in a program – welcome. All the people in the room are inspiring, and that’s why she goes there. She tells him about waking up from a nightmare where she’d been drinking again. She started sweating, then realized it wasn’t real. James identifies, and says it’s trippy. He woke up from a dream feeling hungover. Lala says she never wants to feel like she’s living in the past, where things were said. She wants to move on. He says that’s cool of her. In his interview, James says, it was word vomit. He said things to hurt people feelings because  he was drunk. We flash back to some of that. Lala says she’s going to Farmhouse for the Witches of WeHo party. She can’t cut the tie between them, and wants to see James do well. They give each other a double high-five.

Brett demonstrates his bartending skills, and Dayna says it tastes delicious. Out back, Scheana messes with her phone. Dayna joins her, and asks how she is. She apologizes, saying she knew Scheana was going through sh*t, and Scheana says, it’s not fair. She’s ignored by good friends, people who don’t give her the same consideration. She’s over it. She had surgery, and no one cared. She’s putting effort into friendships where it’s not being reciprocated. In her interview, she says she feels taken for granted, and it’s frustrating. She puts effort into a friendship to the point where it’s embarrassing. She asks if Dayna is still upset, and wishes she’d told Dayna the psychic was there. Dayna says, it wasn’t appreciated, and it feels like a step forward, and two steps back for them. Scheana says, it was a miscommunication. Code for, I screwed up. Dayna asks why Scheana is starting to cry, and Scheana says she wanted to make Dayna smile. Dayna says she doesn’t want to keep having conversations like this. Let’s do better.

Kristen goes to Farmhouse, and asks if the wine is there. In her interview, she says she hasn’t seen or spoken to Katie or Stassi since before they went to Vegas. They’re there to promote the wine, and hopefully sell some, and keep their noses to the grindstone. She sets up, and meets bartender Landon. Stassi and Katie arrive, and in Kristen’s interview, she says she’s been busting her ass. Katie pops in and helps out, but she’s gotten nothing from Stassi, yet Stassi still gets paid. All she has to do is post something on her social media once in a while, but she can’t be bothered. They drink some rosé, and Stassi pointedly ignores Kristen, which seems really awkward.

Kayley, a reporter for US Weekly interviews the Witches. She asks what they argue about most. We flash back to them screeching at each other, and Kristen says, friend stuff. Not about business. In business, they agree on everything. We flash back to Stassi saying they always disagree, and this is why she doesn’t like working with other people. Their guests arrive, including the usual suspects. Tom tells Danica to congratulate Katie; she’s finally married. Danica says, officially? She asks if he’d like to do a softball competition between restaurants. Tom says, the losing team has to clean the other’s bar bathroom on their hands and knees with a toothbrush. Is he confusing this with a hazing? He says, it can just be the team captains, and she says Brett is her co-captain. In Tom’s interview, he says, TomTom has the best drinks, and the staff is full of all stars. He tells her, game on.

Dayna tells Max, she heard he made a new friend in Vegas, and he says, check? He says he heard she and Brett were making out at her party, and she says she thought he said it was dope. He says he was trying to play it cool, but he got frustrated. In Dayna’s interview, she admits it feels good that Max felt something about her kissing someone else, but he had his chance, and her life has to go on. She says she thought they both agreed it wasn’t an issue, and were moving TF on. In Max’s interview, he says he still wants to be friends with Dayna. Ariana tells Lala that she’s five glasses deep with the wine. Lala tells her about James, and says he looks great, and he’s in great spirits. She thinks he really gets it. In Lala’s interview, she says James was the first friend she made on her own there. He made her believe she was a bad-ass bitch. She’s getting that James back, but a better version. She tells Ariana, James is doing amazing. It’s still one day at a time for him. but if he keeps on this road, his potential is huge. In Ariana’s interview, she says she’s seen James struggle, and in getting to know him, rooted for him. He and Lala have had a tumultuous friendship, but Lala always cared. It makes her happy that they’re reconnecting. Lala says they recorded a good song. It was the cherry on top.

In his interview, Beau says he’s proposing to Stassi tomorrow, and she has no idea. He asks her if the wine party turnout is good, and she says she doesn’t like working with friends. Beau suggests she could keep Kristen as a friend, but keep her at arm’s length. Stassi says, Kristen isn’t someone you can keep at arm’s length. Beau asks if she isn’t inviting Kristen to her birthday next year, and Stassi says she’s not interested in being friends with Kristen right now. Kristen is taking away from her life instead of adding to it. In her interview, Stassi wonders why she isn’t allowed to outgrow a friendship without everyone asking about it. The one person she expected to understand was Beau. WTF? Beau says he’s trying to process it, and Stassi starts to cry. She doesn’t know why it’s an issue. He says, it isn’t, and takes her hand. He tells her that he loves her, and he’s sorry.

Dayna tells the others about the bartending class. Lala tells Scheana that she heard Max banged Scheana squared. Tom tells Schwartz about the softball competition, and Scheana whines to Max about no one calling her. Kristen asks Beau if they’re still friends, and he says, of course. Maybe he won’t be giving her a big hug right now though. Stassi tells Katie she forgave Kristen for the worst thing, and she’s annoyed with Beau so hard. Kristen tells Beau, she’s known him longer, and asks if he’s not allowed to have friends if they’re not friends of Stassi’s. Beau says if Stassi is hurt or upset, he doesn’t want to make her more hurt or upset. Kristen asks if he’s afraid of Stassi, and he says, no. In his interview, Beau says he wants to make sure it’s the right decision. What if Stassi and Kristen make up, and Stassi looks back on it, and wishes Kristen was there? Beau is like the nicest, most thoughtful guy in the world.

Stassi goes over to Beau, and asks what the problem is. Kristen says the were talking friendships, and Stassi says, Beau is her boyfriend. Kristen strides off, saying this isn’t the place. In Kristen’s interview, she says she gets that Stassi wants to put an end to their friendship, but she’s there to promote a business. She’s not ruining all that because Stassi is insecure. Beau tells Stassi, if he hadn’t met Kristen, he wouldn’t have met any of them. Stassi says he doesn’t owe Kristen anything, and he says he’s just upset that a friendship is ending. He asks why she’s so affected, and she says she’s upset that he’s holding on to something weird. In Stassi’s interview, she says she and Beau are trying to start a life together, and the situation is giving her PTSD. We flash back to Kristen sleeping with Jax, twice, while he was Stassi’s boyfriend. She doesn’t want to deal with the 2013 psycho sh*t when she’s moving on. Stassi tells Beau she wants to go home. She feels embarrassed and weird. She can’t believe he’s doing this. Is she not his person? In his interview, Beau says he wants Stassi to be happy with him. He wants the proposal to be perfect. He spent all summer lying to her. In trying to make her happy, he’s making her miserable. He tells her that she’s yelling at him, and she says she doesn’t car, asking again if she’s not his effing person. She’s going. She storms out, and Beau says, WTF? Katie says, he knows how Stassi is. He says he needs Katie’s help. She says he needs something.

Next time, the softball game happens; Carter texts Beau, and says Beau and Stassi are cold-blooded; and Beau proposes.

If Loving You Is Wrong

Ian tells Alex, hold on. She says he raped her, but he says, no, he didn’t. He dresses quickly, and she asks why she’s there. He asks if she doesn’t remember. She came to his house, and drank half his alcohol. She says he drugged her, and he asks what’s the last thing she remembers? She says she doesn’t remember anything. Wait. They were at Natalie’s house, and he chased her out. He says he came out to talk to her. She was upset about Brad. She tries to leave, but he blocks her way. She grabs her shoes, and suddenly stops. He asks, what is it?

She says she can’t talk. What about her kids? She remembers… She leans against the wall, and she says she remembers telling him that she didn’t want them anymore. Ian says, or her marriage, or Brad, and she says, yes. She came onto him. She grabs her head, and Ian sits on a box. She apologizes, and says she’s so embarrassed. He tells her, that’s some crazy-ass sh*t to be blaming on somebody, and she says she’s sorry. She was out of it. She heads for the door, and outside, she pukes on the lawn. Randal sees, and Ian asks if she’s okay. Randal comes over, and Ian tells Alex to come in and sit down. She says she has to go home and check on the kids. She’s sorry. Randal comes across the street, and asks, what the hell is going on? He notes that Alex is in the same clothes she was wearing yesterday. Ian tells him, leave her alone, and Randal asks if she’s doing the walk of shame. Ian tells Randal to go back his house, and Randal says Ian just moved here. Shut the hell up. Ian says he’ll walk Alex home, and Randal asks Alex if Ian is her baby daddy. Ian tells him again to leave Alex alone, and says he can make Randal’s life difficult. Randal says his life is difficult every day, as we’d probably all answer. Randal asks Alex what she’s doing coming out of Ian’s house so early in the morning. She’d better answer. Ian tells Randal to mind his own business, and Randal says, this whore is his business. He tells Ian to go back in his house, and Ian says someone needs to kick Randal’s ass. Randal says he’d love to see that. Don’t let it be him right here. Randal moons Ian, and Ian walks Alex back to the other side of the street. Randal follows, and Ian tells him one more time to leave Alex alone. Ian faces Randal, and Alex gets in between them. She says, back up. Everybody go back to their own house, and leave her alone. As Randal walks away, he says, go kiss my ass; there it is, and he moons them again.

Alex goes into the house, and Brad asks where the hell she’s been. She says she has to get the kids to school, and starts to go upstairs. He says, they’re gone. Come back and talk to him – now. She asks where the babysitter is, and he says, gone. She called him late last night, wondering where Alex was; he had to relieve her. Alex says she’s here now, he can leave. He asks where she was, and she says, out. It’s none of his concern. He says his kids are his concern, and she says they were safe. He says, Chelsea had to leave, and she says she needs him to leave her alone; she doesn’t feel well. He asks what’s going on with her? Who was she with? Brian? Bob? Mark? Some other guy? She asks what he’s talking about, and he says he went through her laptop, and saw the dating site. She says, well… and he asks if that’s all she has to say. She says she’s not in the mood for this, and he says she was not only sleeping with Randal, there were other guys well. She says, this is over now. What does it matter? Brad says he loved her, and she says, okay. He says, that’s all she has to say? and she asks what he wants her to say. Marcie says Brad can’t hit Alex, but she can. Let her slap this bitch. Alex says she’s there now, so just get out of the way, and let her take care of her baby. Marcie says she and Brad are getting married, and Alex says, so? Good for her. Marcie says, good for her and Brad. She tells Brad, she’s sick of this whore. That’s another thing; she fed Alex’s baby. Alex says, okay. Want a cookie? Marcie says, she’s such a… and Alex says, what? Whatever is she is, she can have kids. Marcie says she’s going slap Alex into next week, and Alex laughs. She says, Marcie wants kids so bad, take him, and take the other two. She laughs, and says she’s done. She’s out of there. She’s done, and doesn’t want this; any of this. She never wanted this, and never wanted Brad. She hates the neighborhood, and being his wife. He says she could have told him before they got married. She says she couldn’t. She got hooked into everything he wanted. Marcie wants him? Take him. Take all of them. Give the kids up for adoption. She doesn’t care. Alex opens the door, and Brad says, come back. She walks out, and he follows.

Brad tells Alex to get back in the house, but she tells him, see what it’s like to do all this all by himself. She’s done. Tyrel watches from Kelly’s porch. Randal asks, what the hell is going on? What’s Marcie doing there? She says she’s there with her fiancé. Alex pulls out, and Brad tells Randal, he’s not in the mood for his crap. Randal says Brad’s ex was cheating on him with Ian. Brad says, get off his lawn, and Randal says, don’t get mad. Ask Ian. Brad says he doesn’t give a damn, and Randal says Ian might be the baby daddy. Marcie says, him or any other guy. Randal asks, what’s that supposed to mean? and she says he wasn’t the only one. Alex was screwing a lot of men. She went by the name of Jennifer Peppa. Look it up. Available day and night. Randal says she better be lying, and everyone goes to respective corners.

Tyrel calls to Natalie, asking if Lushion is still getting him in. She calls Lushion, who tells her, Kelly said he’s legit. Let him in, but she doesn’t want him to see Justice. She was clear about that. Natalie says, okay; does Tyrel know they have Justice? Lushion doesn’t know. What he does know is, don’t let him see Justice. He’ll see her at lunch. She tells Tyrel she’ll get the key. She comes back out, and tells him, sorry, but he says, it’s all good. She lets him into the house, and he says, it’s really nice. She asks where he stayed last night, and he says, an all-night coffee shop at the bus station. She apologizes, and says, Lushion likes to be on top of things. Tyrel says he gets it. He’s glad a cop lives next door. He asks where Justice is, and she says he’s staying with them. He asks what time school lets out; he wants to see Justice. Natalie says she’ll have to let Kelly know first. Tyrel says his mom told him what Kelly did to Travis. What happened? She says, Travis was bad news, and he asks if he and Kelly were dating, but she says he needs to talk to Kelly about that. He thanks her again, and Natalie leaves. He picks up his paper bag, and says, wow. Home. He looks around.

Randal gets on his laptop. He says, she was dating everybody. Jerome, TJ, Brock, Ryan, Derrick, Steven, Mark, Chris, Brian, Josiah, Larry; going east now, Jane, Joel. He closes the laptop and sits back in his chair.

In jail, Eddie yells, and Kelly tells him, shut up. He tells her, shut the hell up. Lushion comes by, and asks what Eddie is doing there. Eddie says Lushion’s got to get him out. Damn Steven. He woke up in there; Steven played a game on him. Lushion laughs, and says, sorry, but Eddie should hear himself. Eddie asks if Lushion thinks he did this. Steven set him up. Lushion says it looks like a good day to be in there. Eddie’s got no home, and he’ll get two hot meals and a cot. Eddies says, get him out, and Lushion asks, what happened? Eddies says, nothing. He woke up in a toga party. Kelly says, he was drunk, and he says, shut her ass up. Lushion starts to walk toward Kelly’s cell, and Kelly says, they got him on a DUI. Eddie says, trumped up charges. Lushion says he doesn’t care, but when he gets a second, he’ll talk to Steven. Eddie says, get him out, and Lushion says he’ll see what he can do. He goes to Kelly’s cell, and Eddie says, that’s messed up.

Lushion tells Kelly, he’s on his way to see the DA. She says she’s got information, but he says he doesn’t want to take it. He doesn’t want the DA to find out where he got it from. A lawyer will come to see her. She shows him the Bible with the photos inside, and Eddie says, she ain’t supposed to have that. She tells him, shut up, and he says, shut her ass up. He wants to get out. Lushion tells him, then shut the hell up. Lushion looks through the phots, and gives them back to Kelly. She asks what the plan is, and he says a public defender is going to come see her. She says, that kid? Does Lushion think he can get it done? He looked so scared, like a deer in headlights. Lushion says, let them work on it. He also talked to Rick, who came up with some good information. She thanks him, and he says he’s with her. She’s not alone. He’ll see her later. He squeezes her hand, and Eddie says Lushion is just leaving him in there? Lushion shrugs, and Kelly laughs. Lushion walks past Eddie’s cell, and says it looks good on him.

Esperanza walks into the office with Steven. She thanks him for the coffee, and for being there for her. She appreciates it. She asks how long they can keep Eddie, and he says, the paperwork may have gotten lost. She says, and he had nothing to do with it? Have it his way. Lushion comes in, and Esperanza says she has to go to work. Lushion says he wants to talk to both of them. How did Eddie end up in there? Steven says he arrested Eddie on a DUI. Lushion tells him, that’s not what it says in the report; what happened? Steven says he was driving drunk. Lushion looks at Esperanza, and Steven says, she wasn’t there. Esperanza says Eddie got drunk and came to her house. Lushion says, she can’t lie, and she confirms that. Lushion says they have to let him out. Steven didn’t see Eddie driving. Steven says he doesn’t know that, but Lushion says, let him out, or Steven’s no better than he is. Lushion leaves, and Esperanza says, fine. Steven says she knows how pissed Eddie will be, and she says she’ll deal with it. He says they’re still on break. Let’s get more coffee.

Ian sits at his desk, sipping a drink, when Alex walks in, his assistant at her heels. He says, it’s okay, and Alex says, guess what? She walked out of her life. He says, okay… She says, it’s all because of him, but he says, sorry. He doesn’t see the correlation. She says, it’s a good thing. He asks if she’s still drinking, and she says, no, but she’s going to. She opens his desk drawer, and says, come on. He says, all right, and she sits on the desk. He tells her, it’s strong, but she says she’s good. It’s a celebration. She’s going to get a job. He says, that’s a good thing, and she says, how about she works there? He asks what she knows about the law, and she says, not a damn thing. He says, it’s probably not the best idea, and she says, he was really good last night. She doesn’t think she’s done yet, but he says, it’s not the place; he’s at work. She asks if he’s really turning her down, and he says, it’s not the place. She says, fine; be that way. She drains her drink, and he asks if he can call later, but she says by then, she’ll have found someone else to scratch this itch. She leaves, and his assistant tells him that Larry wants to see him. He says he’ll be right in. When she’s gone, he says, oh, man. Oh, man, indeed.

Ian goes into Larry’s office. He says he had a late crazy night, and Larry says, another floozy bites the dust? (Who uses the word floozy?) Ian says, something like that. Larry says, tell him more, but his intercom buzzes. He says, hold that thought. Larry’s assistant says, the DA is in the lobby, and Larry asks, why? She says the DA wants to talk to him about the Travis Kane case. Ian wonders why, and Larry says they’re about to find out. He tells his assistant to let her in. Ian says, this is awful, and Larry says, tell him about it. DA Linda comes in, and Larry asks, to what does he owe the pleasure? She says she knows his reputation in town far exceeds him, and he says he’s sure she’s up for reelection. He offers her a seat, and introduces Ian. She says she got a call from public defender Carl Adams. He said he’s defending Kelly, and that he has clear evidence that proves it was self-defense. Larry tells her, they all say that. She says he knows the outs and ins of the church. Is there anything she should know? Larry says, no. Kelly murdered Travis in cold blood. What more does she need? She says she doesn’t like surprises, and Larry says, there are none. Why is she afraid of this kid? She says, that’s not it, and he asks, what’s the problem. She says she told him; she doesn’t do surprises. He says, there are none. Prosecute to the fullest. She says she intends to, and Larry says, the family will be happy. Anything else? She says she just wanted to look at him, face to face, to get reassurance. He says she has it, and she leaves. When she’s gone, Larry tells Ian, don’t let the door hit you on the way out. Interesting. Ian asks what he means, and Larry says he doesn’t like it. Ian says, it seems like a solid case, but Larry says, public defenders don’t go to the DA. Ian says he knows what they were like when they were young, but Larry says, something isn’t right. Get Carl in there. Ian says, he wants to discuss the case? and Larry says, Carl doesn’t have to know that. Just get his ass in there, and stop asking questions. When Larry is alone, he says, something is not right.

A guard tells Eddie, he’s free to go. Eddie says, it’s about damn time. He sees Kelly sitting on her cot, and asks if that’s her Bible. The guard says, let’s go, but Eddie says, she ain’t supposed to have it. Kelly asks what he’s talking about, and he tells her to give it to him. Hand it over. He tells the guard to take a walk; he’s got this. He tells Kelly, give him that Bible. She’s making his day. They’re going to keep stacking charges; resisting an officer, and keeping contraband. The Lord won’t mind her not having it. The Scripture should be written on the tablet of her heart. She yells for Lushion, and Eddie mimics her. He says Lushion’s not at the station, and tells the guard to open the cell door. Don’t give him that look; Eddie’s his superior. Kelly yells, no! and Eddie pulls the cell door open. She tries kicking him, but he takes the Bible. She begs him not to take it, and he asks, what happened to her telling him to shut up? She says she needs the Bible, and he tells her, take her hands off of him. He looks inside, and says, lookee here. All these women Calvary Church paid off. He’s sure these women will pay good money for the evidence. Kelly begs again, and he says, now it’s please. What happened to shut up? She says she didn’t mean it, and he says, Eddie is going to do like she asked. Lock it up, and throw away the key. He heads down the hall, waving the Bible, and says, good luck with the murder charges, bitch. Praise Jesus. Kelly looks defeated.

Next time, Ian goes to see Lushion, Lushion shakes down Eddie, Alex rides a mechanical bull,  Randal tells Marcie that she’ll never walk down the aisle with Brad, and Brad tells the baby to breathe.

🌎 We Are the World…

Stay safe, flatten that curve, and save the earth. I know, it’s a lot.

April 15, 2020 – Sonny Calls Nikolas a Coward, Beverly Hills Goes To Fashion Week & Surviving

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

I missed the beginning, so here are the highlights. Sonny tells Jason, someone else needs to be warned about Cyrus, and Jason jets. Nikolas and Ava stop by Sonny’s place, via the kitchen entrance, and Charlotte has brought a sack containing her pet snake, Nagini, to Violet’s party. She tells him that they’re going to have so much fun, and hides the sack in the alcove under the stairs.

Lulu suggests Charlotte help by giving the kids some pointers. Charlotte looks at the sack, and goes with Lulu.

Sonny says the newlyweds, and Nikolas says, good to see him. Sonny asks why it took Nikolas so long to climb out from under his rock to say hello, and  Ava says they’re here to pick up Avery for Violet’s party; they’re not looking for a fight. Sonny says bodyguard Cy is taking them; he’s the best, and discreet. They won’t even know he’s there. Nikolas says he can protect his wife and her daughter, but Sonny says Nikolas is going to stay. They have a lot of catching up to do.

When they’re alone, Nikolas tells Sonny, he has an apology to make before Sonny says anything. Several apologies. He’s sorry about leaving Spencer, and sorry for getting Carly involved. Asking her to keep him a secret from Sonny was a bad call. Sonny says Nikolas has made a lot of them, but Nikolas says it was the only way to keep Spencer safe. Sonny says, it wasn’t the only way. Nikolas says he did what was best for his family, Sonny says, he didn’t. He doesn’t care about Nikolas, but he does care about Nikolas’s mother and his son, and the choices Nikolas made that affected them. He knows all he needs to know about Nikolas. Nikolas asks, what’s that? and Sonny says, there’s only one kind of man who would betray his children like Nikolas did, and he has no use for him. We flash back to Nikolas telling Spencer that he needed to be strategic, and Spencer saying he needed his father.

Maxie tells Peter, when she spoke to Lulu, she said Valentin wasn’t worth fighting over, and Lulu agreed. Anna approaches them, and says, Georgie is about to ride the pony. She wants them to watch her. Maxie wonders if she should film it in regular or slo-mo. Anna goes inside, and sees Robert with a wrapped gift that looks like a really long stick. She says, absolutely not. Not in her house. Not now; not ever. Robert says, it’s practically a tradition. Violet comes in with Finn, and asks where Robert went. Robert says he went to pick up something special. Finn asks Anna if he should be worried, and Anna tells him that he should be afraid. Violet asks Anna to help unwrap it. Elizabeth tells Finn, it’s a good party, and he says it’s just something he threw together. She says, Violet is having a wonderful birthday, and he says she doesn’t think he went overboard? She says, not at all, and he says it’s the first birthday party he’s throwing for her, and he needs to prove he can deliver. Elizabeth says, and he did, but he doesn’t need prove anything. The one thing Violet already knows is that he’s a good dad. The gift is unwrapped, and it’s a didgeridoo. Robert plays it, and says, it’s a classic happy birthday.

Franco sees Ava and Avery, and Ava asks if Avery remembers her friend Franco. Franco says he remembers her, and asks if she’d like some popcorn. Ava says, popcorn is gross, and Avery doesn’t like it. Avery says she loves popcorn, and Franco suggests she get her own box. He can be her guide through the party; there’s a juggler and petting zoo.

Catching Olivia on her way in from screaming at Rocco, Robert tells her, he’s sorry, but Dante’s condition hasn’t improved. We flash back to Olivia telling Dante, for so long, it was just the two of them. She knew she could never give him everything he deserves. Dante says she did great, and she says she did her best. Every decision she made was to keep him safe, but she realized, as he grew, her job was going to get harder, because he’s not a man who will ever be content to be safe. He’s a hero in every sense of the word. Olivia tells Robert, it’s been over a year; there must be an improvement. He says he’s sorry to bring her bad news, but she says, unlike the doctors at the WSB, she’s not giving up. As long as Dante is alive, there’s still hope.

Dante asks if Sonny talks to Spencer, and Sonny says they’re very close. Spencer wants to know why he’s been abandoned by his father. I stare at the bowl of moss. Sonny says, Spencer checks in every night with a text or voicemail, but when Spencer calls, he picks up and they talk. Nikolas asks, what about? He’s sure Spencer tells Sonny what a terrible father he is. Sonny says he doesn’t mention Nikolas much; he doesn’t have to. It’s in everything he says, and not in a good way. Spencer tells him about school, what he does, his discoveries in France. He doesn’t say he’s lonely; he doesn’t have to. Nikolas is sorry his son is in pain, but Spencer is a child. In time, he’ll understand the choices Nikolas made were to protect him. Sonny says, Nikolas did it for himself, and Spencer doesn’t understand why Nikolas chose to abandon him. We flash back to Spencer telling Nikolas that he could have come home any time; Spencer never had to leave home, but Nikolas cared more about hating Valentin than loving him. Ava tells Spencer, Nikolas always loved him, but Spencer says he hated Valentin for killing Nikolas. Now he hates Nikolas for not staying dead. Nikolas tells Sonny, of all people, he thought Sonny would understand the lengths he went to in order to protect his family. Sonny says, only cowards do what Nikolas did, and he isn’t a coward. Nikolas would be smart to remember that.

Nikolas says, if Sonny is calling him a coward, he’s conveniently forgotten that Valentin tried to kill him. He had to protect Spencer, and find a way to take back what was his. Sonny says, it’s like one snake taking the head off another. Stay away from the people he loves, including his wife. Nikolas says he regrets dragging Carly into it, and Sonny says, and Spencer. We flash back to Ava asking Spencer not to shut Nikolas out. She knows how profoundly Spencer was affected by losing Nikolas, and how deeply Nikolas loves him. It’s time they both stopped hurting, and put anger aside. Let his father love him again. Spencer tells Nikolas, he could have come back with nothing. Instead, he let Spencer believe he was dead. Spencer has lived every day for the past three years alone, because of Nikolas. He built Nikolas up as a noble prince in his memory, but he’s as heartless as Valentin. The Cassadine legacy is more important than he is. Stay the hell away from him.

Willow and Chase come bearing a unicorn piñata, and Willow explains how a piñata works by pulling strings on it. Chase asks, what happened to beating the thing until it breaks? Finn asks if he has no compassion for paper mache, and Willow says, some kids don’t like hitting things that look like something that’s alive. Rocco runs in, and says Peter Pan is there. Willow goes back out with him, and Chase follows. Finn puts the piñata aside.

Finn tells Chase, he’s glad Willow could make it. Chase thinks she’s having a good time; she loves being around kids. Finn says, it makes sense, since she’s a teacher. He asks if Chase is all right, and Chase says, he’s fine, but Willow’s not. The whole custody battle is getting to her. Wiley isn’t her son, but they bonded fully and deeply. She can’t just switch it off. Michael is fighting for full custody, but if he loses, and Nelle gets Wiley, he’s not sure Willow can take it.

Charlotte comes back in, as Anna heads out the front door. Jason is on the porch, and she says she’s sorry she couldn’t meet at the MetroCourt, but she has this party going on. He says he just wanted to give her a heads up, and she says, if it’s about Peter, she can’t. He says, it’s about Cyrus, and she says she saw he was released. He says, Cyrus is trying to get leverage on key members of law enforcement. He doesn’t know if she’s a target, but Sonny wanted her to be aware. She tells him to thank Sonny, and he asks if the WSB has ever gone after Cyrus? She says she can’t share that information, and he says if she feels something is wrong, it can’t hurt to have back up. Sam comes out with Danny, and Danny says, dad?

Willow asks if Chase knows what the nicest thing about the party is, and he says, the bounce house? The petting zoo? She says seeing his grumpy brother doting on Violet. Does he know any other circumstance that would get Dr. Finn on a pony ride? It’s amazing how kids change your life. Chase flashes back to Sasha telling him, the only reason Michael isn’t asking Willow to marry him, is out of respect for Chase and Willow’s relationship. Chase says Willow would never leave him. She’d feel terrible, and it’s not the kind of person she is. But how could she be happy for the rest of her life, if Nelle got custody of Wiley, and she knew she could have stopped it, and didn’t? Chase tells Willow, he could use a walk. How about her? She takes his hand, and they leave.

Anna asks Jason to excuse her; she has to get back. Danny asks if Jason is there for the party, but he says he had to talk to Anna, and he can’t stay.

Ava sees Charlotte, and asks how she is. Charlotte says she’d like to go home. Ava says she’s sure Charlotte’s mother would be happy to take her, but Charlotte says she’s referring to her real home. Ava is sorry it’s difficult, but says, Charlotte knows Windymere belongs to her and Nikolas. Charlotte says, it’s not about her. Butterscotch misses his stall. Ava asks if Butterscotch is her pony, and she says, Butterscotch is a horse; there’s a big difference. A pony is fourteen hands, and Butterscotch is fifteen hands. Ava says she’s more than welcome to visit any time, but she doesn’t think Butterscotch would enjoy the launch. Charlotte doesn’t think so either. Lulu comes in, and tells Ava, she hopes Charlotte wasn’t rude. Ava says, Charlotte is just upset about her horse not being at Windymere. Lulu says, it’s definitely been an adjustment, and Ava tells her, blame Valentin for giving Charlotte false expectations. Lulu starts to respond, and Ava tells says, she knows what Lulu wants to say. They kind of want the same thing. Lulu asks what Ava thinks that is, and Ava says, for them to be better acquainted as sisters-in-law. Lulu says that’s not what she was going to say, and Ava says, come on. At least play along. It gives them something else to do other than bask in the glow of childhood mirth. Lulu says, it’s no secret she hates Valentin, and Ava says, wait until he pushes her from a parapet. Lulu says, the last thing she wants is her daughter caught in the middle of their feud. Ava says, no problem, and Lulu says, so she’ll help steer Charlotte clear of that? Ava says, she really means, no problem. Nikolas versus Valentin is over; they won. Lulu says, okay, great, and thanks her.

Peter sees Lulu, and Lulu says, look at them, talking socially. Peter asks if she’s warning him not to talk shop, and she says there’s nothing she’d love more, but kids, sugar, animals; it’s not the right frame of mind. He suggests they talk about Maxie instead. Her new job at Deception means a lot to her. Lulu says, it means a lot to her too. If working near, and having her paycheck covered by Valentin is a mistake, it’s Maxie’s to make. Peter says his eyes are open, and he’s watching. She tells him, be ready to catch Maxie when Valentin knocks her down.

Nikolas says Spencer is his son, but Sonny says, according to Spencer, he’s an orphan. Nikolas wasn’t there, so Sonny had to be. Nikolas says he’s sorry, but he cleared the road for Spencer to be the man he’ll never be. Sonny says, spare him the false humility. Nikolas is proud he climbed out of the sea, into bed with Ava, and back to Windymere. Congratulations. Nikolas can do what he wants, but if it touches Spencer – Sonny gets closer to him – he will intervene. Understand him? Nikolas says, yeah, and Sonny says, good. Then they’re done. Nikolas leaves.

Jason tells Danny, there’s something important they need to talk about. He wants Danny to keep being a great big brother. Look out for Scout and his mom, because Jason can’t be around for a while. Danny asks, why not?

Charlotte opens the sack, and asks Nagini if he’s okay in there, and promises he’ll be out soon. Ava and Franco come in, and Charlotte skootches into the alcove. Ava says she left it out there, but Franco says they don’t need to do this now. Ava picks up her purse, and says she’ll check her calendar. How’s tomorrow for their next sitting? He wants to get back to the party; he kind of likes the piñata. She laughs, and says, look at them. At a birthday party, at Anna’s house no less. He says, they’ve come a long way, and she says, yet she’s nowhere near satisfied. He says Nikolas has a bottomless bank account, and she’s a princess. She says, her tiara is tarnished, and he says he’s happy for her. It’s her vision of a dream come true. She says, not yet, but it will be. She puts her purse back, and they go back outside. Charlotte peeks out, and looks at the piñata.

Finn goes inside, and sits on the couch. Anna sees him, and says, just when she thought everything was going well. He says he has a kit in his medical bag, but she says, the party is going famously. She wondered what’s troubling him. He asks if he looks troubled, and she says he does. He says he was thinking maybe he should write Violet a letter, but she says, just tell Violet what he wants to tell her. He says he would be writing from a person who should be there, and Anna realizes he means Hayden. He says, on one hand, it would be a way to tell Violet that her mom is thinking of her, but on the other, it may imply Hayden is coming back. Anna says they don’t know what the case is, and asks if Violet has questioned him recently. He says, it’s been a while, and she says, from what she sees, Violet is a wise little person (aw!), sorting through what she thinks might have happened. When she’s ready, she’ll ask. He hopes he knows what to say when she does. We flash back, going down Hayden Memory Lane. Finn sitting with her at the MetroCourt, and telling her that he had a breakthrough in his research; Finn asking her to leave a toothbrush at his place, and kissing her; Griff telling them, the test results say she’s pregnant; Finn telling her that he wants to be family with her and the baby, and proposing; Finn finding out she’s Rachel Berlin, and asking why she didn’t tell him that she was in trouble. He loves her, and she got him through addiction. Why didn’t she let him help her through this? We move to Elizabeth telling Finn that Hayden is gone; Hayden writing the letter, telling Finn that the baby didn’t survive; Finn seeing her again, when she returned to Port Charles; Curtis asking if Finn thinks the child is alive; Hayden bringing Violet to the hospital, and telling Finn that she’s his daughter; Finn confronting Hayden, and saying he wants to be a part of Violet’s life; Finn telling Hayden that he’s her daddy, and explaining that he and her mommy were so in love, they made a baby; Finn introducing Violet to Anna, and thanking her for accepting Violet. We see Finn reading Hayden’s letter, telling him that she’s leaving Violet with him, and not to come after her, but to make sure Violet knows her mother loves her. We move to Finn and Violet pulling on the Thanksgiving wishbone, and Finn telling Violet that she’s his wish.

Anna tells Finn, of course (🍷) he’ll know. It’s a beautiful party. Just enjoy it, and let everything else go for now. Charlotte comes out with the piñata, and Finn asks where she’s going with it. She says she’s keeping it safe, and asks if it’s time yet. He says, almost, and Anna says she’ll gather the children. He takes the piñata from Charlotte, and she says, be careful. He doesn’t want any candy to fall out.

Um… wouldn’t it feel different? Like a different weight, and moving around?

Tomorrow, Chase says it’s Willow’s decision, Maxie asks Robert if Peter hasn’t suffered enough, and Charlotte tells Danny, there’s going to be a good surprise.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

I wasn’t going to even watch this season, after these horrible women drove my beloved Lisa from the show (and Giggy with her), but my curiosity over Denise’s friendship with Brandi coming back to bite her in the ass – both figuratively and possibly literally – was piqued. So I decided to do a minicap on this one.

I was eating dinner as I watched this, and even before the opening credits I wanted to stab a couple of them with my fork. I could feel my hand tightening around it. I have to say though, new girl – actress, mom of twin eleven-year-old boys, and friend of Denise – Garcelle Beauvais might just give them a run for their money. I have the feeling she’s not going to take their bullsh*t. After moving to NYC from Haiti at age seven, she said she could handle anything, even those damn Housewives. Useless trivia: she learned to speak English from watching Sesame Street.

The women went to New York Fashion Week (hey, you, get out of my city) for Kyle’s first show as a designer. Needless to say, our jeans and T-shirt girl, Denise, was less than enthusiastic. Speaking of Kyle, at the last reunion, she was lauded as queen, since LVP wisely left, and it showed in her narcissism attitude. After checking into their swank NYC hotel, they took a side trip to New Jersey (get out! get out!), and went to Shakers, a strip club where Erika used to work, although they were really more go-go girls than strippers, and the dancing was a real snooze. Erika wasn’t sure if the group was going to be accepting or judgmental. I guess she’s never seen this show before, because they’re usual response is to pretend to be the former, while being the latter for real. At lunch, we found out that Charlie Sheen was once again being a d-bag, taking Denise to court because he no longer wanted to pay child support. Erika immediately called Tom, who volunteered to go with her, but Denise didn’t want to deal with it. In her interview, she said she knew Charlie best, and would deal with her own family in her own way.

Kyle met with friend Domenico Dolce (from the Dolce side of Dolce & Gabbana), who has more money than God, and LisaR met with friend Sutton Stracke, also as loaded as the Lord, but apparently with no taste in clothing. Wanting to show LisaR the latest Dolce & Gabbana bra, she wore a sheer pink blouse over it, along with rainbow sequined shorts. Possibly something I would have worn to RHPS in the days when I went to the midnight movie, but anywhere else? <shakes head vehemently> While the cat was away, Mauricio had an agency party in L.A. When Kyle tried to call, he didn’t pick up, and she said he was probably drunk or stoned. It’s probably the only way he can deal with an association to any of these people.

Sutton joined the group for dinner, and while I wasn’t impressed with her day outfit, in a simple black dress, she outshone Kyle wearing a baggy sequined jumpsuit, and Erika, who looked like she was wearing a man’s black shirt, her dress barely covering her cheeks. Really it didn’t, since they were peeking out like she was wearing booty shorts. She informed Sutton that it was from Rhianna’s Fenty line, and in her interview, Sutton said that if God had collaborated with Tom Ford on the dress, it would still have been just as meaningless to her. A breath of fresh honesty. Dorit also carried the Jacquemus mini bag, which I find both adorable, and horrifying, since I can’t believe someone would pay almost 500 bucks for it, when there are people who can’t afford to eat.

Kyle was definitely clueless when it came to a runway show, not even recognizing her own samples, and Dorit stepped in to help her out. In her words, saving Kyle’s fashion show from Kyle. There was no one to save us from the clothes though, some of which were okay, but mostly reminded me of something a matronly woman would wear on a cruise. Sorry Kyle. All of the women were in the show, but no one can ever rival Ramona on the runway with her robotic look. Dorit complained that she got rewarded with clown shoes after bailing Kyle out. Teddi, who we found out was pregnant, had running commentary in her head, reminding herself not to walk in the way Kyle had imitated last season. Kyle also shouted directions from the wings, which didn’t seem very professional. Paris and Nicky Hilton also stopped by for a photo op, which Kyle hoped would boost the brand.

At the end of the show, Kyle said, everyone was so happy that day, it’s hard to imagine how terrible everything would become. Then the text said, Denise stopped filming in December, and a headline about a passionate affair between Denise and Brandi was shown. We saw Denise sit down, and a producer asked if she’s ready to talk.

FYI, after the fire and an extended period of living in hotels, Denise and Aaron are still not settled, but they are still having sex every day.

Best quote of the night, Garcelle in saying, it’s always time for a shot.

🦘 Calling It a Night While It’s Still Night…

Yesterday, it was late to bed, early to rise, and I’d like to even that out just a little. So leaving you with this oddly appropriate scene from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, which features a didgeridoo. It’s possibly my favorite scene from the film. I love the mesh of cultures. Stay safe. You know the drill.