What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

At Charlie’s, Curtis says Stella was attacked for her opposition to the redevelopment. Jordan adds that a lot of people don’t want it to go through. Julian tells them when Alexis is in office, all their efforts will be for nothing. Molly shows Alexis the article from The Invader entitled Con Job, about Alexis asking for Nora’s help to spring Julian. Julian asks if Alexis is all right, and she shows him the phone.

Olivia goes blah-blah-blah about how taxes paying for everything is wonderful, because she doesn’t have to worry about paying them. She tells Ned that making a city and people’s lives better is patriotic. He got into the election to make the people’s lives in Port Charles better, and she believes he’ll get that chance. The article comes in on her phone. Monica comes in, saying it’s too close to call, but not all the precincts are in yet. Michael joins them, and says he’s proud to have voted for Ned, whether or not he wins. Ned thinks his odds might be improving.

Elizabeth tells Franco that she’s going to Charlie’s where the nurses who support Alexis are gathering. She thinks it’s going to be a long night. Franco leaves for his session with Doc, and Elizabeth runs into Kim. Kim tells her that she’s never walked down the aisle, and never missed it, but seeing Elizabeth’s smile is making her reconsider. Elizabeth says she’s walked down the aisle a few times, and hopes this one is the charm.

Entering Charlie’s, Stella says she wants to put her feet up and get a glass of champagne. Curtis asks Molly if everything is okay, but Molly says, not even close, and shows him her phone. Stella wants to talk to Alexis, but Curtis thinks that’s not the best idea at the moment. She asks what she’s missing. Finn tells Alexis that he came to support her night of triumph, but she says there might not be any triumph on Charles Street tonight.

Franco goes to Doc’s office. He asks where the brain in a jar is, and Doc tells him that Faison’s brain is being biopsied; he’s waiting for the results. Franco thinks his brain might be worse. Faison was never a childhood killer. He wishes he could say the same.

Sam and Drew arrive at Charlie’s. Sam asks what’s going on, and Molly tells her to ask Julian. Julian is on the phone with Scotty, and tells him to keep trying. He tells Alexis that Scotty said it’s too late to block the publication; it’s out there. They see there’s breaking news on the television. Molly looks at her phone, and reads out loud about Alexis’s visit to Nora leading to Julian’s release.

At the Quartermaine’s, Michael also reads out loud. The article asks if Alexis is taking a truly principled stand or just trying to save her ex-husband’s pub, which is a possible front for mob activity. What else is she hiding in her history of involvement in organized crime. Monica doesn’t believe it for a minute, Olivia doesn’t care. She says Alexis has been high and mighty. If pulling strings for Julian’s release cost her the election, maybe she deserves it.

Elizabeth asks if Kim wants to come. She’d love to, but has to go with other camp. Oscar was invited to the Quartermaine’s, and she thought he should spend time with his new family. Elizabeth says that politicians come and go, but family is forever.

Doc wants to do word association, and says, family. Franco wonders if he’s sure he wants to ask that, and was hoping for more like a stream of consciousness where he figures it out. Doc says that’s so much work; he’d rather play word games. He reminds Franco that they don’t have a typical doctor/patient relationship. Franco is supposed to be helping him with his research, and Doc will help Franco with his past. He says, family, and Franco says, feathers. His mom was constantly dusting, and used a feather duster; she cleaned compulsively. Doc asks if he felt as if she was cleaning up after him and Andrew, and Franco admits they were a lot to handle. Doc asks if they were ever punished, but Franco doesn’t remember. He says she was more like a total pushover. She let him get away with murder.

Phones are ringing, and everyone says, no comment. Olivia says the article went viral, and Monica says that every reporter in town wants a reaction. Ned tells them to stick with no comment. Monica says whether it’s true or false, it’s up to Alexis to comment. The bell rings, and Michael answers. It’s Nelle. Monica tells her that she’s glad she could make it; her timing couldn’t be more perfect.

Sam tells Molly that once again their mom is paying the price for being involved with Julian. Molly tells Alexis to refute it, but Alexis says she can’t. The innuendo that she’s involved with the mob is patently false, but everything else is true.

Elizabeth joins everyone at Charlie’s. She tells Alexis that she heard, but not to worry; no one will believe it. Alexis says in this instance, it’s correct. She was trying to seek justice for someone far from perfect, but wrongly convicted. Julian wasn’t a willing accomplice, but under duress. He was menaced in prison, and she was trying to seek his release. She got Nora to convince Olivia-J to tell the truth, and he was released based on her testimony. Stella says it sounds like she set right a wrong, and admires her honesty. She thinks once the truth is heard, everyone will feel that way. She’s going to the polls to do damage control, and Molly decides to go with her. Jordan tells Julian it almost sounds like collusion. He thinks she might want to investigate who put this out at the eleventh hour. It’s sabotage, and someone will pay.

Nelle thanks Monica for including her. Michael asks for a word with Monica, but the bell rings again. It’s Kim and Oscar. Kim says it’s still too close to call, but Monica says maybe not for too long. Ned thinks it’s too late for the article to have made a difference, but Olivia-Q says there are still a few key districts that vote late.

Jim tells Alexis if it goes her way, he hopes they can find common ground. It’s no secret they’re on opposing sides, and he hopes they can overcome their differences. He wonders what’s with the long faces, and Julian asks what he’s doing there. Jordan says the polls are closed. Jim tells Julian he’s there to get a drink; was it something he said? Julian says, like he doesn’t know about The Invader hatchet job just in time to sway voters. Curtis says it ain’t over yet. Finn tells Alexis that he’s not a glass-half-full kind of guy, but she still has a chance. Alexis wonders why she doesn’t feel that way. Curtis tells Drew he wants to talk about something other than politics, and Drew suggests talking about him and Franco.

Doc tells Franco that he didn’t commit murder. Franco says he just wasn’t successful. Betsy sent Drew to an orphanage to keep him safe. Doc says Betsy wasn’t always honest, and wonders why Franco will accept the worst about himself. Why believe the worst without knowing if it’s true?

Ned says the exit polls are showing that he’s gaining support. Kim admits to voting against Measure A, but Olivia says she should vote her conscience. She explains to Kim that Julian is Leo’s biological father. Kim says she and Julian are friends. Olivia gives Kim her phone, and says she should nip the friendship in the bud. The doorbell rings, and Monica says it could be reporters. Ned says if they want a statement, they’ll get a statement. He answers the door, and Julian flies in, shoving Ned up against the wall.

Ned swears he didn’t leak the story, adding that Alexis didn’t deny it. Michael tells Julian that he’s trespassing, and he assaulted a political candidate in front of witnesses. He has one chance to leave. Olivia tells him that if he doesn’t, he’ll never see Leo again. Kim tells him that one black eye in the family is enough, and to back off for Leo’s sake.

Sam tries to make suggestions to Alexis, but Finn says Alexis knows what she needs. Sam asks what makes him an expert. He says he voted for her, and he wouldn’t vote for just anybody.

Curtis tells Drew that Jim is a big money dude, trying to play by intimidating the residents, and one is his auntie. He doesn’t like him. Drew says that Jim knew him and Franco when they were kids; Betsy dated him. Curtis says, now he’s here. It’s a helluva coincidence.

Franco tells Doc this isn’t what he signed up for. Doc tells Franco that he’s trying to get him to separate fact from fear, and imagination from reality. He asks if that’s the only time Franco tried to hurt Drew or were there other incidents. Franco isn’t sure. Doc tells him breathe, and think back. He’s not Franco; he’s Bobby. He asks what Bobby and Andy liked to do; what games did they play? Franco says, hide and seek. He remembers Drew hiding in a trunk, and him locking it. Drew yells for Franco to let him out. Doc asks what he remembered.

Kim tells Ned the reporters will be there wanting the next headline about them. Ned tells Julian that if he’s done making an ass of himself, he knows where the door is. Julian says, the hell with you, Ted. The others go back into the living room, but Kim stays behind. She calls Julian “Charlie,” and tells him to wait.

Finn says he doesn’t know about Alexis, but he could use drink. She tells him for someone who doesn’t speak at meetings, he knows what to say to her. She thinks a martini would be great, and they go over a list of various drinks. She says it would be great to numb world. Finn says for couple of hours, but then in the morning…  She says she’s going to lose, isn’t she? She didn’t even know she wanted the job until Laura stepped down. Then she got invested. She would have made great mayor. Finn says he believes it; he voted for her. She says she should have known better; it was a ticking time bomb. He says in retrospect, full disclosure earlier would have given her control of the narrative. She says there would have been no way to spin it. She made her choice to get entangled with Julian. She keeps making the same mistake over and over. She says it’s the definition of insanity to do that, and expect a different outcome. She’s incapable of making healthy a choice when comes to Julian. She can’t let go or move on. Finn puts his arm around her.

Julian tells Kim that as much as he wanted to punch Ned, it would have been the wrong thing to do. He says now that she saw the article, she knows who is who, and what he is. She tells him that he didn’t make it a secret. He thought it was his last chance to get it right. Buying the pub, putting down roots, making friends, and trying to get it right with the kids, showing them he’d changed. The article proves he can’t erase the past. He’s trapped in his name and history, and anyone else foolish enough to get close will be too. She asks if it’s a warning, but he says it’s a fact. Just ask his ex-wife. Kim says she’s driving. He asks where, and she tells him that he knows.

Curtis says Jim is arrogant, smug, and the definition of power and privilege. He’s in it for the money. Drew thinks there’s something more, and angle he’s just not seeing. Curtis asks what’s up with him and Franco. Drew says since Jim has been in town, Franco has been acting weird. He’s been carrying around a rabbit’s foot that inexplicably means something to him. He wants to find Betsy, and get to the bottom of what’s up with Jim. Curtis says he messed with the wrong dudes, and he can’t wait to take his ass down.

Franco tries to leave, saying he doesn’t want to see Elizabeth disappointed. He starts to tear up, and Doc says whatever he remembers, he can’t lock it inside. Let him help unlock the past and free him from it. In Franco’s mind, Drew cries to be let out of the trunk. Franco tells Doc that Pandora’s Box unleashed all the evils of the world, and the moral is, don’t open the box. Doc reminds him that the box also contained hope.

Michael tells Monica that he appreciate her effort with Nelle, but what Monica thinks is inclusive, Nelle might take as encouragement. The winner is about to be announced, and everyone gets ready.

Kim and Julian get to Charlie’s. Curtis thinks Alexis can still pull it off. Drew looks at Jim. The winner is declared to be Ned. Bleh. Nelle says she’s proud to be part of the family, and hugs Michael. Ned asks Oscar what he makes of it, and Oscar says he’s now related to the mayor.

Jim sees Franco going into Charlie’s, and tells him the way things going, it looks like he’s sticking around Port Charles. Julian tells Kim that he’s just making things worse, but Kim says he belongs there. Drew stares at Franco. Franco thinks about him being locked in the chest. Elizabeth asks what going on.

About to light a cigar in the alley, Jim is startled by Curtis. Curtis tells him smoking is bad for you, and so is standing in an alley all alone. His aunt got mugged recently, and it bothers him a lot.

Ned is grateful for the support, and blah-blah-blah, his wife, blah-blah-blah. The people have spoken. He’s honored and humbled, and won’t let them down. He says the city is a living thing, and is better when they come together to improve it, blah-blah-blah. Molly says she can’t watch. Stella tells her it’s not about how many times we get knocked down, but now many times we stand up. Jordan agrees, and Stella thanks Jordan for backing her up.

Ned pledges to work with the business community to revitalize Charles Street.

Curtis tells Jim it’s been a big night, and the article was right on time. Jim realizes that Curtis is a friend of “Andy’s,” and Curtis tells him that his name is Drew. He says good luck with that smoking thing, and leaves.

Ned gives a shout out to Laura, who might have been standing there. His commitment to Charles Street is no less than hers.

Doc talks into a recorder. He says Franco has a fascination and fear about his childhood. Noting unusual there, but he has the belief that he was born bad, and that murder is in his DNA. Is it? Or is Franco still Bobby the child, playing hide and seek with himself?

Ned says to those who are afraid to walk the streets at night, he’s bringing law and order back to Port Charles. Those who do harm will be punished to the full extent of the law.

Franco drains a water bottle, saying he was really dehydrated. He leaves with Elizabeth.

Ned says blah-blah-blah, the love and support of his family, and introduces Olivia. He says they need to come together as a city and as neighbors. With all their differences, there’s more that unites than divides them. The work begins today; the dream goes on.

Sam is sorry, but Alexis says she’ll be fine, and thanks Sam and Drew for their support. Drew tells her to let them know if she needs anything. Finn helps her on with her coat, and she tells him she’s just waiting for everyone to leave so she can cry like a baby. Julian tells Kim there’s nothing he can say or do, and she agrees. She says she can make him a drink. Alexis tells Finn she needs to get out of there. He says they can do that, and gives her his arm. They walk out, and we see Alexis’s campaign flyers on the ground.

Tomorrow, Oscar wants a favor from Julian, Lulu resigns, and Maxie is the one who needs to do this.

The Haves and the Have Nots

The guards separate Quita and Candace. Candace calls Quita a crackhead, and I laugh. DA George wants to talk to Candace, and has her brought to the interrogation room. She has nothing to say to him, but he says he’ll talk. He tells her she’s too feminine to be such an animal. What? He wants to talk to her about Quincy and the charges for his murder. She says she wasn’t charged with anything. He asks if she wants to see what they have, and she asks if he wants to go to hell. He says, no actually. I’m kind of liking George; his banter is amusing. He shows her some new evidence – Jeffrey’s bracelet that was found with the body. She says they found a body without a warrant, and it can’t be used. He says a witness is enough, and they have Jeffrey, who seems to be under a lot of pressure. He asks if she’s going to let Jeffrey go down for what she did. He’s sure the bracelet has DNA all over it. She says it won’t see the light of day, but he tells her it will when Jeffrey testifies. Moving on, he says the old man said he made a mistake, and nothing will be on record; she’s free to go. He thinks she must have friends in high places.

Jeffrey is brought in, and sits across from Candace. He looks pretty tired. He asks why he’s there, and she says they’re playing games. She says they think they’re stupid, and he says, one of them anyway. She reminds him that they’re recording everything. He can’t believe his mother turned him in, and Candace can’t believe he’s shocked, especially since he didn’t do anything. Jeffrey wonders why Veronica didn’t turn Candace in, and asks what Candace promised her. Candace says Veronica didn’t turn her in because there’s nothing to turn her in for. He says he hopes he doesn’t find out that she and Veronica are in cahoots against him, and she calls him paranoid. She says they’re not talking in here because that’s what they want. He says she wants to control him like his mother does, but they’ll see. She says Jeffrey knows her, and to STFU. A woman tells Candace she’s free to go, and Jeffrey says, see you soon.

A woman at the desk tells Candace, no bail, no phone call, no record; who did that? As Candace is about to leave, David stops her. He says his son is in a jail cell for her crime; she got him into this. Candace says his wife did that. He says she knows Jeffrey didn’t hurt that boy. It was her that he was trying to help, and she needs to take responsibility so he can be exonerated. She ask if he thinks that’s going to happen, and he says she doesn’t have a shred of decency. She agrees. She asks if he knows Oscar, the guy he hired to play with her emotions and steal her money. David says it was Jim’s money. Candace says apparently he does know Oscar, and payback is a bitch.

Nameless woman friend asks if Landon is hungover; she is. He says she looks it. She wonders if this is his way of getting back at her for telling the truth. Landon doesn’t have a good poker face, and Charles is going to know he’s in love with him. He asks her how Senator Johnson is, and how’s his wife? She tells him it’s a low blow, but not as low as he’s willing to blow. Good one. She says if he can’t handle truth, maybe they shouldn’t be friends. He tells her that she can’t handle him talking about her and the senator, and she says, as much as he can’t handle her talking about him and the future president. Please, if you’re reading this, and know this character’s name, let me know what it is. I’ve worn myself out trying to find it, and for whatever reason, Landon never uses it. Maybe she doesn’t have a name.

Hanna tells Derek a funny story. He says it’s good to see her smile. He says she was so sad when he was at her house, he wanted to grab her and hug her. She’s glad he didn’t; she would have freaked out. She asks if he doesn’t have work, but he says he was done. She tells him that she has to help out upstairs. He wants to take her to dinner, since she said the tea replaced their coffee date. After some hesitation, she says okay, and he says tomorrow night. She doesn’t want to go anywhere fancy, since she has nothing to wear, but he says he’ll take her wherever she wants to go.

Kathryn pretends to be looking at a magazine when Hanna walks in. Hanna says she saw her run, and don’t tell her she wasn’t listening. Kathryn asks if they’re going on a date, and Hanna says yes. Kathryn wonders about her not having any clothes, and Hanna reminds her about the fire. Kathryn wants to give her a makeover; she can use some tweaking. Her ladies will have her knock his socks off. Hanna says Derek has to take her as she is. She heads upstairs, and Kathryn says she’s calling her glam squad.

Quita gets sprung, and Oscar stops her outside. He tells her that he’s her godfather; he just bailed her ass out. She has something he needs. She tells him to get lost, and he says she can go back in if she doesn’t want to talk to him. She asks where he wants to do it, but he wants the card she stole from Wyatt. She’s not telling him anything, but when he threatens to have her sent back in, she says she had it, but not anymore. He asks some questions, and she doesn’t know much; just that it was a lot of money in an offshore account. He gives her five hundred dollars, and says he may need more information. He gives her his number in case she thinks of anything. She says she’ll do his white ass for that much, but he just wants the info. When she’s gone, an officer asks if Oscar had any luck, but no. Oscar says he’ll give him a grand if he does something else.

David calls Veronica, but she doesn’t want to talk to him. He says they need to do something about their son, and she says she already did. She calls Jeffrey that girl, and says she did him a favor. David wonders if she’s drinking, and says he needs her sober to talk. She asks if he had her run off the road; she knows it was him, Kathryn, or Jim. He wants to talk about their son, and doesn’t know what she’s talking about She says when she finds out, she’ll come after him. He says she had Jeffrey arrested for something Candace and her brother did. Veronica says when finds that woman, she’ll send her back to David in pieces. David says she’d better not, and he’s tired of playing games. She’s tired of the conversation, and hangs up.

Wyatt calls the bank and wants to know how to get his money. He’s really talking to Oscar, who says he needs a police report before he can be reimbursed. Wyatt says he’ll come to the station, and Oscar asks if he can give him an hour, adding that he’s at the eleventh precinct. As soon as he hangs up, Oscar jets out the door.

Mitch goes to the family restaurant with Benny, and introduces him to his Uncle Vinnie. He wants to talk about something. Vinnie asks if he’s in trouble, but Mitch says it’s something else. Benny needs a loan. Vinnie says, no disrespect, but he looks like he can’t back it up. Mitch says it’s because he’s Black, and Vinnie is like, your point? Mitch says Benny’s sister brought them War, and Vinnie says they owe her one. Benny wonders for what, and Mitch says he’ll tell him later. Benny says he needs a tow truck; he lost his. Vinnie asks if it got towed. BA-DUM-CHH! Benny tells Vinnie that he needs forty-five grand, and Vinnie says he can do that at 25% interest, which is a discount. All payments are to be in cash; $18k every six months. Vinnie tells Mitch to tell Benny what happens if he can’t do it, and Mitch says he’s good. Vinnie says, it’s done, and hands Benny a stack of cash out of the load he’s counting. Benny asks if he needs to sign anything, and Vinnie says the only ink there is blood; remember it. As they’re leaving, Mitch tells Benny that it’s easy to get, but harder to pay off. Benny’s phone rings. It’s Veronica, who wants him to come over. Jeffrey told her husband about burying Quincy’s body, and she needs to talk to him. He says he’ll be right there.

Candace goes to David’s house. Erica answers the door, saying she should be there. Candace says he won’t be home any time soon; he’s trying to get his son out of jail. Erica asks how she is, and Candace asks if she wants a slap. Erica says she doesn’t have the money, and Candace says she doesn’t want her to get it; it’s too soon. Erica says that’s what she thought, and Candace says she didn’t tell her to think. She wants Erica to get every account number she can find. She wants it all. Everything; the insurance policy numbers, his mother’s maiden name, and his blood type, and don’t take forever. Candace asks why David wants Erica to stay. Erica tells her that she made up a lie about an abusive ex. Candace says it won’t work for long, and tells Erica that she doesn’t have much time.

Landon tells Charles he’s on fire; they love him. Charles says it will be a long four years, but Landon insists it will be eight. He starts to take off Charles’s shoes, and Charles says he’s got this. Landon tells him resisting makes it harder. Charles asks, resisting what? and Landon says everything that comes with being president. Charles says he needs Landon’s help. He wants his kids to have as much normalcy as possible, and doesn’t want the press hounding them. Landon says he’ll help, and with anything else at any time.

Wyatt goes to the police station. He tells the desk sergeant that he needs to file a report. Oscar is sitting in the waiting area. Wyatt is lead to a room in the back, and the officer that Oscar bribed comes in. He introduces himself as Jonathan Holmes, and gives Wyatt paperwork to fill out. He asks for Wyatt’s cell phone, telling him it will make things easier if he can get information from it. In the hallway, he gives Oscar the phone, and Oscar gives him the cash.

Sarah goes to Jim’s hotel room. She gives him all the evidence, and he says, good girl. She asks if they’re even now; she could go to jail. He says she won’t, and asks if his son’s testimony is the only thing left. She tells him it is. He says he’d like to be there when the DA finds out, and Sarah says she wouldn’t. Jim tells her she’s boring him, and to go home

Veronica’s doorbell rings. She tells Melissa she’s getting sick of her, and Melissa says she’s sick of Veronica too. Veronica grabs her wrist, and says, if it weren’t – and Melissa finishes, for her carrying her grandchild. She knows. Benny comes in, and Veronica says they need to talk. Melissa tells her to go in the kitchen; she’s not moving, and tells Benny to watch out. Veronica goes upstairs with Benny.

Veronica tells Benny that Jeffrey told them everything. He could be in a lot of trouble. Tampering with evidence, destroying a corpse; they’re serious charges. He says he can’t go to jail, and she says she’ll handle it. The body is inadmissible, so it should be okay. He says, easier said than done, but all right. She starts coming on to him, and he calls her Mrs. Harrington. He starts taking off his clothes, and says he should be getting bills for this. Veronica says he’ll be paying her.

David comes in, and asks Melissa where Veronica is. Melisa says she’s in her room; she’ll show him. She leads David upstairs. The door is locked, but Melissa produces a key, ignoring David’s suggestion of knocking first. They walk in, and Veronica and Benny are going at it. Melissa says, uh-oh, and David just stands there, frozen.

Next time, Jeffrey tells Justin that he’s not going with him, George says the bullets match, and Benny wants to fight David.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Dorit complains that it’s raining on the day of the party. LVP says it won’t ruin anything, and we flash back to her own cover shoot. Giggy! Dorit tells us that Bella magazine told her that she embodies what the magazine represents.

Camille meets Teddi at a restaurant. Her daughter is walking in a fashion show, and she thinks she’s more nervous than Madison. Kyle joins them, and they order some food. Kyle asks about the dinner. Teddi says Dorit gave the narration to LisaR about what’s happened in the past few weeks, including the issue at the beach house. Kyle wonders why make such a big thing about it? Teddi says she threw LVP under the bus too, telling LisaR about her leaving dinner. She alluded that LVP gets jealous of Kyle and Dorit’s friendship. Kyle says LVP will be hurt by that. Teddi says if she slipped up like that, she’d be calling her.

While walking through the park, Dorit says she values and loves LVP as one of her best friends. They never discussed the dinner, but LVP doesn’t want to go over it again. Dorit says in the moment, it was abrupt and shocking. She says she was laser focused on Kyle, since she was upset because of her. LVP tells her to cut to the chase; she thought they’d moved on. Dorit says she wondered what warranted that kind of departure. She repeated to the others what LVP said about Dorit ignoring her when they’re’ in a group. In her interview, LVP says Dorit’s best quality is that she talks a lot, and her worst quality is that she talks a lot. Important stuff gets lost in the nonsense. LVP asks if she has any other nuggets; now is her chance. In her interview, LVP wonders why Dorit would bring it up again. Dorit says both she and Kyle had strong feelings. LVP says she did too; that’s why she left. Dorit thought she was upset because she wasn’t paying attention to her, since LVP told her about not getting attention as a child. LVP says that wasn’t what she meant. She got plenty of attention, but her parents were British in their lack of being demonstrative. She doesn’t need Dorit’s attention, and it was inappropriate to say. LVP tells her to go make herself beautiful. In her interview, Dorit says a weight has been taken off her shoulders. Dorit hugs LVP, and jumps up and down. I always find adults jumping up and down and clapping a little disconcerting.

Erika, who’s wearing the coolest sunglasses ever, is on her way to her publisher to give them an update. She tells them she’s never felt so unintelligent; she feels like a fish out of water. One of them tells her a lot of people are excited about the book. In her interview, Erika is glad she’s wearing her sunglasses. She kept them on because of her allergies, but they also can’t see the fear in her eyes. She says it’s important to understand when you’re not the smartest person in the room. She needs an ally. Her co-writer says that he just sent a chapter to Erika for tweaking, and Erika says she and her mother have some memories to include. In her interview, she says she’s beating the odds, and there’s no room for mistakes.

Dorit gets glammed up, and says it feels like she’s going to the prom. She’s not just the host this evening; she’s the guest of honor, being on Bella magazine’s fashion issue for Fashion week. She needs fashion oozing out of her. She calls PK, and tells him that she’s nervous. She thinks it’s because he’s not there. PK tells her that it’s her thing, and to relax.

LisaR says she can’t keep track of what’s going on with the girls. They have the same, yet different, schedules. They’d gone shopping, and the delivery guy was robbed on his way to Delilah’s apartment; they took everything. She’s not feeling great about leaving Delilah in the city. She confirms a Dolce & Gabbana appointment for the girls on her iPad. She’s finding her boundary being a momager. It’s their career, but they still need guidance.

The hairdresser tells Teddi not to touch her hair all night; one of the extensions is questionable. Teddi video chats with Edwin.  Erika decides to go with the baby doll hooker look.

LVP joins Kyle, and tells her what Dorit said, but Kyle doesn’t think she was being honest. She’d told everyone things LVP shared with her. They were both pissed, and Dorit told Kyle some things LVP told her in confidence. There were things she shouldn’t have said last night, like LVP being needy. LVP is like, I’m needy? and Kyle tells her Dorit said she was jealous, needy, and insecure. Kyle says it started with Dorit filling in LisaR. Then she told LisaR about the beach house, when she and Erika are fine. Kyle told her that LVP would be hurt by what she’d said, and LVP says she’s been more than kind to Dorit. She doesn’t get where this is coming from. Kyle says she’s not creating a problem, but Dorit said it to the whole table. She can’t not say something.

Kyle is impressed with how everyone looks, and says they all brought their A game. She asks what everybody did all day. Erika tells them about her meeting at Simon and Schuster. She says it was intimidating, but it’s not like she’s going to win the Pulitzer Prize. Dorit asks if there are any words of wisdom, and they all tell her to enjoy it and bask in the moment.

Editor Courtenay greets them, and the ladies take a photo together. Dorit has her photo taken a million times, and does interviews. She says it’s unbelievable, and nothing she expected would ever happen. she feels like last time she got that much attention was when she walked down the aisle with her husband. LisaR and Camille run into a designer they know. Everyone agrees that the magazine photos of Dorit are fabulous.

Kyle tells Erika that the beach house situation was blown out of proportion. Dorit made it seem like she alone was upset. It wasn’t a big deal, and she wasn’t alone in how she felt, but she cares about Erika, and doesn’t like it. Erika says she loves Kyle, and agrees about it being blown up. LisaR says she thought it was ridiculous. Erika is happy to hear her say it, She didn’t understand why it was a big deal, and never wants to talk about it again.

LVP talks to Teddi, saying she was taken aback by Dorit. Teddi says she doesn’t think it was meant to be malicious. In her interview, Teddi says Dorit is all about Dorit, and it’s going to bite her in the ass. That’s just what happens. She tells LVP that Dorit perceived she was upset because she and Kyle were talking. She thinks Dorit likes to embellish while telling a story. LVP says, maybe.

Dorit says it couldn’t have gone any better; she’s on cloud nine. She asks if the ladies want to go for a drink. Kyle can’t put her purse in the rain, and everybody makes a dash for the car. In her interview, Teddi says they’re not witches; they won’t melt. Although that’s debatable. Erika says, sugar melts, m-effer. Camille loves the rain, and says it’s refreshing, which is so like her.

They go to a bar, and Erika tells Teddi that she can see her who-ha. In her interview, Erika says that’s how to handle seeing up someone’s skirt. Tell them you can see up their skirt. Do them a solid. Teddi adjusts things. They toast to Dorit and the magazine. LisaR says she’s not responsible for anything she says. Kyle suggests getting drunk, which is received quite well. She’s there to have fun, but wants to get something off her chest first. Dorit says, so much for the fun night. Kyle says Dorit is great, but if she didn’t care, she wouldn’t say anything. She’s wondering why Dorit singled her out at the beach house, and we flash back to that. Kyle asks why make a bigger deal of it than it was. They’re supposed to be friends, and not only did Dorit make it a big deal, she made it like Kyle did something bad. Dorit says there was a lot of conversation, and she was outspoken. Kyle feels like Dorit put her at the front of it. Erika is like, it’s okay, we’re good, I love you, I don’t want to fight. The next time, she’ll stay. LisaR goes to the bathroom just to get away, and Kyle asks why hurt her or LVP by saying things against them? In her interview, LVP wonders why Kyle is doing this now. It’s Dorit’s night, and she doesn’t want to be in the middle. Kyle wishes LVP would chime in. Dorit wonders where this came from, and who told her?

Can you believe all this for something so stupid?

Erika tells Dorit not to run away with it; she’s fine. Teddi says last night, Dorit relived the story about LVP leaving dinner because she and Kyle had a connection. We flash back to Dorit saying LVP is jealous. Teddi says she implied that LVP is jealous when she connects with somebody else. Erika says Teddi is 100% right. LVP is confused, since Dorit never implied the severity of her statements. Erika reapplies her lipstick, suing the bottom of a glass for a mirror. Dorit tells Teddi to take down her tone, but Teddi says Dorit is yelling over everyone. Dorit says she’s not one of Teddi’s accountability clients, and in her interview, Teddi says she’s not accepting new clients. Kyle is glad at least someone else is defending themselves. LisaR asks Camille what the issue is. It’s complicated, and she barely understands. Kyle says Dorit shouldn’t have said what she did. She’s never screwed Dorit over; why is she feeling screwed over? Dorit doesn’t get it. Erika tells them to stop it. In her interview, Kyle says LVP is just sitting there, making her look like an idiot. LisaR says she’s done. She has to look after her girls, and Camille’s daughter has a show tomorrow. They leave. LisaR thought the plan was to have fun and get a buzz on. What happened? What happened is what always happens. Someone has a legitimate gripe, but decides to bring it up at a totally inappropriate time.

Kyle feels depressed, and Erika doesn’t want her to feel like that. Kyle asks if Erika wouldn’t feel the same way if she was LVP. Would she feel screwed over? Dorit walks past them without a word, and goes up some stairs to the street level. Erika says she doesn’t have all the facts. In her interview, Dorit is hurt by what Kyle did on her night. LVP joins them, and asks if they’d feel screwed over if they were in her place. Teddi says she would, but she’s sensitive. Kyle heads up the stairs, and Erika says this is what she hangs out with gays, and yes, she’d be pissed.

LVP says loves them. Dorit says she’s going back in a cab, and LVP says she’s going with her. In her interview, Kyle can’t believe LVP is offering her a ride. She holds Kyle to a different standard. If she says anything remotely unflattering, LVP punishes her. We flash back to some unsavory moments during reunions. Erika tries to smooth it over. In her interview, LVP says her friendship with Dorit supersedes any things that were said. If she insists going on her own in a taxi, she’ll go with her. Erika asks Dorit to swallow her pride, and do the right thing. She doesn’t have to have a conversation, just get in the car. Kyle is crying, and LVP says she doesn’t want her to cry. Kyle keeps saying to leave her alone. Erika tells Dorit not to say anything to anyone. Kyle wants to be left alone.

Back at the hotel, Dorit wonders why Kyle wants to divide her and LVP. Dorit says that LVP didn’t want her going back alone, and doesn’t understand why Kyle is behaving like this. LVP says she loves Kyle and appreciates her. In her interview, LVP says she just had to endure being attacked and yelled at, and she’s the one who has to reassure Kyle. Kyle says she’s known LVP for ten years. She knows her feelings were hurt, and she’s confused by her behavior. She tells Teddi that she never feels appreciated. Teddi thinks that LVP doesn’t know how to handle someone talking bad about her, and needs to process it . Kyle doesn’t want to do this fake bullsh*t anymore.

Dorit tells Erika that she told LVP what was said when they were in the park. Erika says she’s here for her.

LVP asks if there’s a problem between her and Kyle. Maybe she doesn’t like people talking smack about her all night. Kyle says it wasn’t her. If she’d done that, it would have been a huge deal. LVP refuses to admit Dorit is wrong, and was kissing Dorit’s ass. Teddi says it’s more like she was blasé. Kyle says she was basically screwed over. LVP tells Kyle that she loves her. Teddi say Kyle needs to feel the love. LVP  says they’ll talk about this for the next two weeks, but she’s leaving. Teddi follows her to the elevator, saying Kyle needs her friendship. She begs LVP to come back, but the elevator doors close.

Teddi insists LVP cares, and Kyle says, it is what it is.

Next time, Fashion Week, Kyle won’t be stepped on, Bethenny makes an appearance, and Teddi thinks LVP should apologize.

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Sonny tells Mike to admit he took the money. The last thing he wants to hear is that his dad is dead in the street. Mike says he’s just an obligation to Sonny; a mess he has to sweep up. He doesn’t know what happened to the money. Sonny says he’ll cover it, but Mike has to be straight with him. Who does he owe and how much is the grand total?

Dante looks at Nathan’s empty chair. Jordan asks why he’s at the station, and he says he just wanted to follow up something. She tells him he’s on leave for a reason; Nathan was his partner. She says the department recommends speaking with someone, but he thinks there’s no need. He wants to focus on Nathan’s family. Jordan says her door is always open.

Curtis picks up the tab for dinner with Stella. He says it’s the least he can do. She needs to save her money in case the developer takes over the community. She says that’s not going to happen. Today is the cut off for voter registration, and she’s going back to knocking on doors; she’s been at it all day. Curtis isn’t happy about her doing it alone, but she tells him Charles Street is safe. He thinks he should go with her, but she says she’ll be fine, and calls him a nag.

After Stella leaves, Curtis check his phone. There’s a text from TJ, asking if he’s seen this. He opens the file attachment, and says, damn.

At the hospital, Alexis tells Finn if he ever quits his day job, he can get something in stand-up. Deanna approaches them, and asks to talk to Alexis. She says she supports Alexis in the mayoral race, and thinks she needs to see something. She shows Alexis the computer, where a campaign ad is playing. The ad asks how Alexis can make tough calls when she hasn’t made the right choices in her private life. The ad shows pictures of Alexis and Julian, saying that Alexis married a known mobster. She’s wrong for Charles Street, wrong to fight organized crime, and wrong for Port Charles.

Kim goes to Charlie’s, where Julian reminds her that his name is Julian. She says he seems more like a Charlie. He tells her that he has some avocado toast with her name on it. She says the last thing she wants to do after a long shift is cook, and her son has a more active social life than she does, so it beats eating alone. He asks what’s keeping her from a better social life, and she says she hasn’t met anyone she’s been interested in. He says the bar is a place to meet people, and they smile at each other.

Anna checks Spyder Finder, but there are no results for Henrik Faison. She hears a baby crying in her mind. Robin comes in, startling her.

On Sonny’s mother’s grave, Mike swears he hasn’t gambled in seven years, and he’s proud of his chip. He made the drop like always, and asks if Sonny thinks he’s lying. Sonny doesn’t know what to think. Caruso needs him, so why tell him that Mike lost ten grand when he didn’t?

Julian is glad to see Kim; he thought she got scared away. She asks, over what, and he says his daughter being married to her son’s father. A small crowd of press runs in and descends on Julian. One of them asks if he has a response to the attack ad using him against Alexis.

The end of the ad says it was paid for by people who want to elect Ned. Deanna says it’s gone viral, and she thought Alexis should know. Alexis thanks her, and sees Diane called to warn her. Finn says all politicians lie, but she says it’s still persuasive. Finn tells her that he’s still registered at his old address, and she drags him into the elevator, saying she’s getting him registered in Port Charles. She needs all the votes she can get.

Jordan asks if Dante is still working on the embezzlement case, but he says he’s clearing Nathan’s desk, so Maxie doesn’t have to worry about it. Jordan says he doesn’t have to worry about it right now, but he tells her since he’s on desk duty, he might as well. He talks about when Nathan first joined them. He’d been on the fast track with New York’s finest, and he wondered why Nathan was there, thinking he wanted the glory without doing the work. Nathan pulled out a Yankees mug, and they got to talking. He realized they weren’t that different after all. He could trust Nathan with his life, and gave his family to him. He was half as close to his family as Nathan was. He says no one gets a cop like another cop. It feels like he’s lost a brother.

Anna forgot Robin was coming. Robin says she would have reminded Anna had she answered her texts. Felicia and Mac told her that Anna was all right; she was starting to worry. She says she’s heartbroken for Maxie, losing her husband to Faison, of all people. She didn’t know Nathan well, but knew he made Maxie happy. They have to be strong for her sake. She tells Anna that at the very least, Faison is out of their lives forever. She moves some pillows, and Anna grabs her laptop.

At The Floating Rib, Alexis tells Finn he can take the sticker off now. He says he didn’t really want to be a walking billboard for civic responsibility anyway. Alexis says she didn’t expect Ned go that low, but Finn tells her not to assume he endorsed it, since there are often independent groups who make ads. Alexis says, except everything it said was correct.

A reporter asks Julian how he feels with his past being weaponized against Alexis. He tells them no comment, and Curtis steps in. He tells them they have five seconds to get out before he calls the police, and shows them the door. Kim says that was unexpected, and Julian wonders what it was about. Curtis tells him that he just saw an attack ad against Alexis, and Julian had a starring role. Kim asks why they’re using him, and Julian says, long story. He suggest he tells her over dinner, and asks her to join him.

Anna tells Robin that she’s doing confidential research for the bureau. Robin asks if it’s something about Faison or forensic research. Maybe she’s not sure he’s gone? Anna says he’s definitely gone; she confirmed it. Faison will never be a threat again. Robin says she hates Obrecht, but for the first time, she understands her. Obrecht gave up Nathan to protect his welfare. Trying to be a good mother was more important than the twisted game she was playing with Faison.

Dante tells Jordan that Nathan was there for them, and all he can think about is the kid he left behind. What if it happens to him, and Rocco is left without a father? Jordan tells him to go home and be with his family, and tomorrow they’ll honor his partner. The desk sergeant says there was an assault on Charles Street, and the perp is on the way in. An officer brings in a cuffed Stella.

She tells Jordan to do something. A man tried to steal her purse. A bedraggled dude says this woman assaulted him, but she says she put her self-defense training to good use. He’ll think twice before mugging another woman on Charles Street. She says she was working on voter registration, when the streetlights went out. Then this reprobate (one of my favorite words) tried to take her purse. The guy claims he thought she needed help, and she asks if he thought so when she clocked him. He says she just admitted assaulting him, and Stella says they struggled over her purse before the cops showed up. He’s a double disgrace, attacking an innocent woman. The guy says there’s nothing innocent about her. Jordan calls Curtis, and asks him to come to the station.

Mike tells Sonny maybe one of Caruso’s guys is skimming. Sonny says he’ll take care of it later; Mike is the priority. Mike says he’s fine, and Sonny asks why he took a bag man job? Mike says he needs to make living; he doesn’t exactly have a pension. Sonny says he can give him money, but Mike tells him a son isn’t supposed to support his father. Sonny says he’d rather give him money than worry. Mike says there’s been no problem until this week, but Sonny wants to stop the problem before it starts. He offers to give Mike an allowance, and says he’ll take care of Caruso later. Mike asks if he’s sticking around a few days.

Anna tells Robin about a drunk Obrecht coming to see her after Nathan went public about being Faison’s son. She seemed terrified. Despite her obsession, or maybe because of it, she understood the threat. Anna wishes she’d paid more attention and done something more. Robin says she’s not responsible. Faison came for his son, not her. The whole nightmare is finally over. No more head games; just peace. She’s sorry Anna had to go through it alone, but Anna says she didn’t. She, Jason, and Sonny were an affective team. Robin says she doesn’t want to gloat under the circumstances, and Anna tells her not to get carried away.

Alexis tells Finn the information was slanted to suit the opposition’s agenda, but it’s not entirely wrong; she’s mad bad choices. Finn says it’s true she’s no saint, but he’d be suspicious of any candidate who came off as perfect. Her past made her stronger, and Ned’s privileged life has made him no match for her. Kim and Julian walk in.

Curtis tells Stella that she had no business walking by herself. She tells him not to blame her, but the guy who tried to rob her. Curtis says he intends to have a few words with homeboy. Jordan says there’s a discrepancy between their stories, and Dante said there’s a store camera, but it was out too. Jordan believes Stella, but there’s no corroborating evidence, and his injury validates his claim. Curtis says unless she can prove her side, it might not end well for her.

Sonny tells Mike it’s all settled. He’ll take care of the debt, but doesn’t want him working for Caruso or anyone like him. They have a drink, and Mike offers Sonny a cigar. Sonny says maybe later, and asks about Rita. Mike says she takes care of him, keeps him out of trouble, and she’s a good woman. Maybe if they’d met ten years earlier… Sonny says he might not have appreciated her then. Mike says who knew Sonny was a romantic? Sonny says people grow. Mike tells him that here he is again, taking care of his dad. When he got into recovery, he moved back to make it on his own. He never wanted to be burden to Sonny and Courtney. Sonny says he means Carly. He tells Mike to let the past go. They’re together. They’re family, and something he’s learned is that nothing is more important. They clink glasses.

Anna says sorry she deceived Robin. She and Finn aren’t together. Robin asks if they broke up, but Anna says they were never together. It was just part of an operation she was running for the bureau. They had to make everyone believe they were involved. She was stalling in telling Robin, because she felt ashamed for misleading her. They all liked Finn, and she didn’t know how to tell them it was just pretend. Robin says it didn’t seem like pretend.

Kim greets Finn. She tells Alexis that it’s nice to meet her, and she has Kim’s vote. Julian asks for a word with Alexis. He saw the attack ad. She says him, and everybody else. He says it’s disgraceful, and she doesn’t deserve it. She says neither does he. He tells her that he keeps trying to make things right, even if it means staying out of her life. He’s sorry. No matter how hard he tries, he keeps hurting her

Jordan tells questionable dude that she ran his name through the system, and sees he’s out on parole. He says he’s the victim, and she asks how it will look if they find out he’s lying? She wonders how his parole officer might feel about false statements or an attempted robbery charge. She tells him that she’ll make it simple. If he declines to press charges, she won’t have to investigate any further. It’s his choice.

Robin says she saw two people authentically involved. There’s acting and being, and they were being a couple. They had a familiarity with each other like shorthand. Anna says only if that means gritting her teeth and smoothing over his catastrophic bluntness. She starts going off about how he acted like an expert about things he didn’t know, and wouldn’t take real expert advice. She feels better now that he’s back in his civilian role and off her conscience. Robin asks who Anna is trying to convince? Her or herself? Neither one is convincing, and she tells Anna to admit she has feelings for Finn.

Kim asks what going on, and Finn explains that Alexis is Julian’s ex-wife. Alexis tells Julian the ad wasn’t his doing, but he says it wouldn’t have existed if he hadn’t done what he did. He’s sorry it was used against her, especially with something so important. He thinks she’d make an excellent mayor, and he’ll do whatever he can to help. She asks if he’d like to endorse Ned, but Julian says that’s asking too much. She tells him that she can fight own battles. Julian sits down with Kim. Finn asks Alexis if she’d rather go somewhere else, but she says let’s just enjoy the evening.

Anna says Robin must be tired. Robin says she’s not sleepy, but she’s starving. Anna says she has actual groceries, but Robin wants to go out. She thinks they both need to get out of the house. She’s not trying to get into Anna’s business, but she seemed genuinely happy with Finn, and he seemed happy with her. She tells Anna to stay open to new possibilities. Faison is out of her life, and it might be a chance at a new beginning. Robin goes upstairs, and Anna looks on her laptop, seeing no results found for Henrik.

Jordan tells Stella that she’s free to go. Stella asks about pressing charges, and Jordan says she just convinced the guy not to press charges, and not to escalate it. Stella balks at letting him go free, but Jordan says they’ll keep an eye on him until there’s something to charge him with. Stella leaves to fill out some forms, and Curtis asks Jordan what the chances are of the streetlights and the cameras shutting down at the same time. She says slim to none. She has no basis to investigate further, but he can.

Mike tells Sonny that he has chili on the stove, and he used Ruby’s recipe. He leaves to set up the guest room. Sonny thinks again about the cigars, but when he opens the box, he finds a package of cash. I’m thinking maybe Mike has dementia.

Kim tells Julian she must be the only person in town who didn’t know he was married to Alexis. He says it never came up in conversation, and she says he’s full of surprises. He says they’re not all good. The attack ad took full advantage of the truth about his checkered past. She asks how much is criminal, and he tells her a lot, If she wants to leave, he understands. She says she’d be lying if she said her dream date is drinks with an ex-con, but her family believed in the power of redemption. If he’s paid his debt to society, and is now a law-abiding citizen, she doesn’t think he should pay for it the rest of his life. She asks if he’s committed to living on the right side of the law, and he says, totally.

Finn asks Alexis if she wants to go. She says she’s not ducking and running, but if he wants to, she doesn’t blame him. Anna and Robin come in. Finn says, on second thought, there is something to be said for ducking and running. Robin asks Anna to tell her again how it was just a work relationship.

Dante starts to leave with the box of Nathan’s stuff. He stops, and puts the Yankee mug on his desk.

Tomorrow, Nina tells Anna to conduct business with Valentin later, Sonny questions Mike about the money in the cigar box, and Lulu tells Peter that she doesn’t know much about him.

The Haves and the Have Nots

David paces at the station. He says he’s Jeffrey’s attorney, and he’s tired of waiting. The desk sergeant says he’s called the DA’s office five times, and David tells him to call again. DA George shows up, and David says these clowns won’t let him see Jeffrey. George asks the sergeant to bring Jeffrey to the interrogation room. Isn’t he already there?

Yep, he is. Justin plays with Jeffrey’s phone, while Jeffrey recovers from the headlock. Jeffrey wonders what happened, and Justin says he only put him to sleep. Jeffrey asks what the hell is wrong with him, and Justin says he can be as crazy as Jeffrey makes him. Jeffrey wants to go back to his cell and never talk to Justin again. Justin isn’t going to just let him walk away after all he gave up for him. Jeffrey says he didn’t ask him to give up anything. Justin says he lost his marriage. Jeffrey says don’t blame him, blame his mom, and accuses Justin of causing the accident. Justin says if he did, he was doing Jeffrey a favor. Jeffrey says he doesn’t need Justin to do anything for him, but Justin says too bad, Jeffrey is stuck with him. He agrees to take Jeffrey back, then throws him against the wall.

David walks in, and asks what the hell? Justin says the prisoner was getting rough. David says to get away from him, and get the cuffs off. He asks if Jeffrey is okay, and Jeffrey says he is. David asks for Justin’s name and badge number. He asks why Justin is handling Jeffrey in that way, and Justin says he was resisting. David begs to differ, but Jeffrey agrees. David realizes that Justin is calling Jeffrey by his first name, and Justin makes the excuse of not wanting a mix-up between the two Harringtons. David realizes Justin is the cop who came to his house, and tells him to get lost.

He asks Jeffrey if he’s sure he’s okay, and Jeffrey says he is. David asks why Jeffrey is in jail, and what did Veronica do exactly? Jeffrey says she told the judge and the DA that he murdered Quincy. David says he’ll do all he can. Jeffrey asks if his mother is okay, but David says his only concern is Jeffrey. David asks about that cop, but Jeffrey says there’s nothing to tell. David needs him to tell the truth about everything. Jeffrey says Veronica taped Justin in his room after they had sex, and showed it to his wife. David is like, damn, and Jeffrey says he asked. He asks why Jeffrey was so upset, and Jeffrey says Justin was aggressive; he’s very jealous. David asks if Jeffrey is in love with Justin. Jeffrey says, no, and he asks if Jeffrey is into him. Jeffrey says at times, and David asks if he needs help dealing with him. Jeffrey says what he needs is to get out of there. David says he’ll make some phone calls and work on it. He tells Jeffrey that he loves him, and Jeffrey says he loves David too. David leaves to make some calls.

Mitch takes Benny to the hospital, and says he’ll wait. Benny goes to Veronica’s room, and she calls him her hero. She gives him a hug, and thanks him. He says he did what anybody would have, but she says, not anybody. She says her husband wouldn’t have done it, or her son. He asks why not, and she says she has a way of trying to make people better, and they don’t appreciate it until it’s too late. Benny is like, okay, and says she has a way of making people crazy; she’s a control freak. She says that might be, but she can’t control him. She likes that. She owes him an apology. Their affair got out of hand, and she said some mean and rude things. He did too, but she gets it. She also lied. He is good in bed, and she wasn’t faking it. He says he knows, and she calls him arrogant. He says, just confident. She thanks him, and asks what she can do. He tells her just get better, but she asks what he needs. Anything. He says he’ll think about it, and she says he has an IOU she’s good for.

Before Benny leaves, Veronica says she needs a favor. She asks him to pick up some things at the house for her. She has to stay at the hospital for a while, and doesn’t want to look like a hag. As if. She tells him to check on the house as well. She has a house guest; her son’s fiancé. He asks if she’s gay, and Veronica says not gay, but she’s crazy. Benny tells her that Jeffrey tried to kiss him once, and he hit him. Veronica says she hopes Benny hit him hard. He had no business trying to kiss him, especially since they were involved. Benny says it was long before, and she asks if he thinks about her. He says he has to go, and gets the keys from her purse.

Mitch asks Benny if she wrote him a check, but Benny says she just wants him to get some things. Mitch calls him an errand boy. Benny asks when Mitch’s uncle is getting back. Mitch says if Benny plays it right, he won’t need his uncle. Benny tells him shut up, but Mitch says Veronica is in love with him. Benny says she’s more dangerous than Mitch’s uncle.

Landon tells Charles that he keeps getting better and better at speaking. Charles calls Landon his cheerleader, and Landon says he’s special. He’s cleared Charles’s morning, and has someone he can spend a long night with. Charles asks if she’s beautiful, but Landon was talking about himself. Charles says he’s exhausted and just wants to go to bed. He asks if he’s checked on “her,” and Landon says he might want to pay a visit soon. He’ll get on a plane after the interviews. They go over Charles’s schedule.

Erica finds Gia in the hotel lobby, and gives her a shopping bag. Gia asks if Candace is Erica’s pimp, but Erica says no. Candace arrives, and asks for her money. Erica says she’s also brought the clothes Candace asked for. Candace asks how it feels with no one watching her back; that’s what happens when she gets crossed. Erica says, sorry, and Candace says unless she wants a slap, don’t say that; she knew what was going on. She’d better work fast on David for the hundred grand. She tells Erica to get her ass out.

Candace asks glia if she has a room. She doesn’t, and Candace says she can use hers, but it’s the last time they’ll talk in public. After this, she doesn’t know her in public. She tells Gia to go ahead of her. Before Candace can follow, a guy walks up to her, saying she’s under arrest. Candace asks for what, and to see his ID. He claims to be from vice, and says she’s being arrested for robbery. Candace says she did nothing, but he tells her not to cause a scene.

Kathryn visits Hanna. She asks how Hanna is, but doesn’t quite buy that Hanna is okay. Hanna asks what’s going on, and Kathryn says Derek thought she didn’t seem too happy. Hanna asks if she’s trying to get Derek to ask her out, but Kathryn says he wanted to. Hanna tells her about Derek doing the dishes, and Kathryn says she didn’t tell him to do that, but thought it would be nice for her to go out for coffee. Hanna says Kathryn knows what she’s been dealing with, and Kathryn says all the more reason to get out. He’s just asking for coffee. Hanna says it’s been a while since she laughed, and asks who he is. Kathryn says he’s worked on their properties for years. His wife died a year ago, and he’s been lonely. She tells Hanna she should go, and she won’t take no for an answer. She’s calling him, and telling him to take Hanna to dinner, even if she has to push her out the door. Hanna says no, and Kathryn says, fine. She asks if Hanna is coming by later, and Hanna tells her not to set her up.

Sarah comes to Jim’s hotel room. She says she can’t stay long. He tells her to suit herself. She says she’s getting married to a judge. Jim calls him an old bastard; old enough to be her grandfather. He asks what the judge did for her, and she says she worked hard. Jim – king of bad double entendres – says she worked him hard. Sarah says she won’t be intimidated. He tells her to relax, sit down, and shut up. He’s not letting the DA bury him without him burying all of them, including her. She asks what he wants. He wants every shred of evidence. She says he’ll find it out in discovery. He tells her whatever they have, make sure they don’t have. She says she can’t tamper with witnesses. The star witnesses are his son and Jeffrey; the rest is circumstantial. Jim wants what’s on record to disappear, like what was on record about her did. She tells him that she paid him for that, and he says the casual sex was his gift to her. She says she’ll do what she can, and starts to leave, but he tells her to take off her clothes. She says she’s getting married, and he says he’s been married for years. He insists, and tells her not to act like she doesn’t enjoy it. He’s the best she’s ever had.

At Veronica’s house, Mitch remarks what a nice place it is. He tells Benny to get that truck, and says he could be living there. Benny says he ain’t that dude. Mitch says it’s in his blood; look at Candace. Girl knows how to come up. Melissa comes out in a tiny robe over some gorgeous lingerie, and asks what they’re doing there. Benny says he’s there to get some things for Veronica, and asks if she remembers Mitch. She says she can’t forget, and calls him very handsome. She says Benny is too, and he says he’s just there to get her things. Melissa asks when she’s coming home, and Mitch says it sounds like Melissa doesn’t like her very much. Melissa says she doesn’t like her at all. He asks why she’s there, and she says Veronica wants her to marry her son. He asks why she’s living there, and she asks if he thinks she’s sexy. He says, hell yeah. She asks if Benny does, and he asks where the bedroom, so he can get Veronica’s things. She leads him leads him upstairs, and Mitch laughs.

In Veronica’s room, Benny looks for the clothes she wants. Melissa asks if he knows her son is gay. She’s been locked up a long time, not being fulfilled, Veronica watching all the time. Jeffrey looked at her like he was disgusted, and she was beginning to doubt herself. She thanks him for saying she’s sexy. She takes robe off, and he asks what she’s doing. He doesn’t know? She says trying to remember what feels like to be wanted and desired. Benny says he just came to get the clothes. Melissa says he could get more, and won’t let him past. She takes a condom out of his wallet, and says she knew he was ready. Benny keeps protesting, but not that hard. She pushes him onto a chair, and gets on his lap. He says Mitch is downstairs, and she says he can’t hear. Melissa doesn’t hear him saying no anymore, and Benny tells her to shut up.

Landon orders a drink. He’s sitting with a woman from the campaign whose name I don’t know. He tells her that Charles has back to back meetings, but he got him situated. The woman says Charles sounds like a five-year-old, and Landon says, a toddler. He’s always whining about how tough it is and how tough it’s going to be. It’s a lot. Landon starts talking about Candace, and the woman says she’s keeping everything in line, but Candace makes it hard. She keeps doing more bad things. Landon says she’s a thug, and he doesn’t want to know. He says Charles really wants that stupid bitch. She says she sees that Candace is getting under Landon’s skin. Landon tells her that Candace almost had a thug attack him, and Charles just melts for her. The woman asks if that’s what it is, or is it that Landon wants Charles to melt for him? She says he’s 100% straight, and Landon says he’s known some who weren’t – in practice.  She says Landon wants him; he’s in love with him. Landon says Charles is his boss, and he doesn’t want to hear it. Landon leaves, and the nameless woman orders another drink.

There’s a knock at Wyatt’s door. Justin yells for him to open the damn door. Wyatt tells him back away, but Justin bangs on the door. He gets it open, and comes in holding a crowbar. He asks if Wyatt is hard of hearing, and says he’s going to show him who belongs to Jeffrey. He asks why Wyatt has been calling Jeffrey, and Wyatt calls him insane. Justin says Wyatt claimed they were lovers. He’s not going to let a drug addict junky take what’s his. Wyatt tells him to get out again, and Justin says, don’t call him. Wyatt repeats that Justin is insane. Justin raises the crowbar, but misses Wyatt. They tumble over the chair, and begin to tussle.

Next time, Candace shares a cell with Quita, David threatens Justin, and Melissa moves on to Mitch.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

PK tells Dorit she’s amazing, and his party was beyond. We flash back to some highlights. He says her performance was great, but George likes to sing with people who can’t sing; it makes him sound better. She’s like, thanks a lot, and moves on to Teddi’s beach house invite. She tells PK about the argument, and how Kyle defended Teddi. In her interview, she says Kyle hurt her feelings by not sticking up for her. Dorit opens a box, and it’s a custom-made 3D figurine of her and the kids. They drop it, and the baby’s head pops off. Well, so much for that. It was pretty cool while it lasted though.

Lisa and Ken are at Vanderpump Dogs, fawning over a bag full of fresh puppies. The assistant tells them the lawsuit was dismissed. Huge relief for everyone. Lisa wants to celebrate. In her interview, she says a public figure is susceptible to litigious bullsh*t. Coupled with the puppies, it’s a glorious day.

Teddi and Kyle shop for athletic wear. They talk about the party. Teddi wonders why it has to be so hard, and tells Kyle the thing between her and Dorit is like water torture. She got excuses, but not an apology. In her interview, Teddi says you have to own your sh*t. Kyle says the ones who think they’re right will never back down. She likes Dorit, but sometimes wants to tell her to shut up and listen. Teddi tells Kyle nothing is easy with this group.

LisaR and Erika meet for lunch. LisaR says she’s in denial about everything. Daughter Delilah is moving to NYC, and she hasn’t processed it yet. She wants Delilah to be safe and healthy, and she wants it to be fine. Erika says it will be. She talks about her soap schedule, and they discus her character on Days of Our Lives. We see an ancient clip. Erika asks what it’s like to be a soap character for decades. LisaR says you have to learn a lot of lines. We see a clip of Erika on Eileen’s show.

LVP waits for Dorit, who calls saying there’s traffic. LVP says she lives around the corner from her. She’s going into Teddi mode, and it’s annoying. Kyle follows Dorit in. LVP immediately tells them about the lawsuit being dropped. They toast to that. Kyle says speaking of negativity, what was up with Dorit and Teddi? She asks if she shouldn’t have chimed in, and says she thought they needed an interpreter. Dorit thinks friends shouldn’t jump in. Kyle says LVP chimed in for Dorit, but Dorit says that was different. In her interview Kyle says now she needs an interpreter. Kyle says it was two against one, and LVP says she wasn’t against Teddi. Kyle says that’s not what she meant, but she thought Dorit didn’t get where Teddi was coming from. She feels ganged up on, and shuts down the conversation. She starts to get weepy, and both Dorit and LVP wonder where this is coming from. LVP says she waited a half hour, and she’s going; she’s had enough. She strides off, and Kyle tells Dorit that LVP is mad because Dorit is talking to her. in her interview, LVP says Kyle is crying over nonsense, and it has nothing to do with her. She wanted to celebrate, and wished she could have talked about that. She’s not dealing with bullsh*t. Kyle and Dorit go after her, and Kyle asks why she’s leaving. LVP wants Kyle to stop saying they were attacking her. She’s going home to her husband, who would rather spend time with her than they would. She leaves them with their mouths hanging open.

Kyle and Dorit go back to the table. Kyle is annoyed, saying LVP left because the focus wasn’t on her. She knew Kyle was upset. Dorit says it’s just because it wasn’t about her, and it isn’t adult behavior. She tells Kyle that LVP needs a lot of attention, and it probably goes back to her parents. We flash back to LVP telling Dorit that her parents weren’t demonstrative at all. Kyle is shocked that LVP never told her about it, and says it hurts her feelings. She’d like to think they’re closer than that, and it’s weird that she was never told. Dorit tells her about the photo shoot for the jewelry line, and Kyle didn’t know about that either. Kyle says she tells her close friends everything, and doesn’t want to feel like the friendship is unbalanced. Dorit says they have to address it, but LVP isn’t picking up their calls.

Delilah wonders how LisaR memorizes so much. LisaR encourages Emilia to get her driver’s permit. She’s dragging her feet, saying she still wants some childhood. LisaR says she forgets Emelia is just a kid. She worries about them growing up too fast, and says they can take their time. She asks Delilah about moving. Delilah says she just needs a bed. LisaR says they really need to pick out stuff, but Delilah is going to the spa for a non-surgical facelift. LisaR wonders how that will help someone who already has a baby face. So do I.

Teddi gets the beach house ready. Hopefully she has the right glasses. She wants everyone to be happy, and doesn’t know if these chicks can handle such a laid-back atmosphere. Dorit is late to pick up Kyle. She calls, saying her driver doesn’t know how to get there.

Giggy! Harrison! Schnookie! Erika picks up LVP. Erika is surprised to see turtles in LVP’s pond, and LVP says she has everything. She asks if Erika brought anything for the potluck. In her interview, Erika says she left her Jell-O salad with marshmallows at home. She tells LVP that she meant to bring a bottle of champagne, but forgot it. LVP brings a cake.

LisaR is busy at the Days set. She says it’s been twenty-five years, and it’s like going home. Before she started on the soap, she’d only done Taco Bell commercials, and it changed her life. She discusses wardrobe with the wardrobe guy. She tells us that she’s the OG Billie, but two other actresses have played the part, and her character has done things she doesn’t even know about. She says it’s a lot of pressure, and she has to be ready or she’ll look like a fool.

Dorit makes it to Kyle’s. She says if she can survive the limo ride from hell, she can survive her issues with Teddi.

LVP tells Erika about how the girls ignored her good news. Erika thinks there’s more depth to LVP than she shows; they’re alike in that way, with keeping things to themselves. We flash back to Kyle taking several calls while at dinner with LVP.

Dorit wants to know what’s going on with LVP. Kyle doesn’t like rocking the boat. She says LVP will hold their friendship hostage, and Kyle cares about her. Dorit thinks they should have a side chat. Kyle says she did nothing wrong.

LisaR calls Erika, telling her that she has twelve scenes coming up. Erika says she’s missing out on the beach excursion. LVP joins in the conversation, saying she has ruffled feathers. LisaR says it’s a shame she can’t be there. Erika says Dorit called Teddi a psycho. LisaR has to jet – it’s call time.

Teddi fluffs pillows. Erika and LVP get there first. Teddi shows them around, and it’s beautiful. LVP says doesn’t know why Teddi was anxious; she never met a beach house she didn’t like. She says it’s casual, funky, and bohemian, like Teddi. Dorit and Kyle finally arrive. Dorit thinks being on the ocean is magical. She brought tons of food since her mother is in town. Teddi says she got glasses just for her. Dorit calls it extending an olive forest. LVP asks if Dorit left late, and mentions waiting for her. Kyle had planned on talking to LVP about the aborted dinner, and wants LVP to cool her jets. Dorit asks if that’s why she left so abruptly. LVP says it was a couple of things. She’d been excited about the canceled lawsuit, and they ignored her enthusiasm. Kyle doesn’t think so. She thinks LVP felt brushed aside. Isn’t that kind of the same thing? In her interview, Teddi says, welcome to my beach house, and asks if they can’t chill for just a moment. LVP says she wanted to talk about something that was huge. Maybe she felt tired and drained, and didn’t like that Kyle was saying they’d planned to gang up on her. Kyle says it wasn’t about LVP for a minute. She felt left out in the moment, and that Kyle and Dorit were having a moment. She asks if LVP would have left had it been Dorit who was crying, and LVP says she doesn’t know. In her interview, Kyle says this is making her question where the friendship stands, and how LVP feels about her. The friendship isn’t balanced. LVP says she doesn’t want to talk about it anymore. Everyone focuses on the food. Kyle goes to freshen up. She thinks LVP is going to want an apology, but she’s not getting one. Kyle wants an apology, but probably won’t get it.

Dorit says it’s peaceful by the ocean. Teddi and Kyle sit outside. Kyle says she’s pissed off. It would have been easier to just say she’s sorry, but that’s not the truth, and she wants them to be honest. Erika joins them for the sunset, and Camille arrives. LVP sits down, and Dorit follows. The sunset is breathtaking. Kyle tells Camille that she came at a more peaceful time, and Camille asks what happened. Erika says LVP was hurt, and LVP explains what happened at dinner. Kyle believes LVP doesn’t want to say that she really felt excluded. Kyle says she tells LVP everything, and wonders if LVP feels the same way about her. In her interview, Erika says all of them are petty, and this is really about three bitches competing for friendship. Kyle says she’s been LVP’s friend a long time. LVP says she doesn’t prefer Dorit over her, but Kyle feels LVP doesn’t treat her as well. The friendship doesn’t feel balanced (the word of the night). LVP tells Kyle she’s sorry if she was unfair, and asks Kyle to apologize for saying she was plotting against her. In her interview, Kyle says LVP’s sorry is a good sign. She didn’t expect it. Even though LVP isn’t being up front about why she left, she’ll take the apology. They agree to be honest with one another. Kyle says she feels like LVP is too hard on her sometimes. In her interview, LVP says none of it was worth crying over. Since they don’t’ understand each other’s point of view, she apologized. The friendship was too important. As soon as Kyle gets up. LVP steals her comfier chair.

Next time, the ladies take an exercise class, Dorit tells Erika the girls were mad she left, and Dorit tells the group something private that LVP told her.