Tag Archives: Patty McCormack

May 9, 2018 – Nelle’s Plans For Carly Are Epic, Dorinda Gets Drunk in PR, Star Steals the Mic, Kim D, PC’s Bad Seed & Midweek

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Julian brings Kim a cortado to the hospital.

Josslyn asks how Oscar is, since last night was intense. She asks if he told Drew, but Oscar doesn’t want to disappoint him. It’s their first time hanging out.

Carly cancels her appointment with Doc. She’s told they have opening tomorrow.

Sonny boxes with the bag, thinking about Carly saying Nelle is working an angle, and making excuses for not watching Mike. Michael asks if it helps, and Sonny says not as much as he wishes it would.

Carly says she’ll have to look at her schedule. She takes a pill. Josslyn walks in and asks what’s up with that?

At the gallery, Ava tells Nelle despite being coerced into going to the shower, she’s bringing a gift. Nelle thought she’d make life easier, and has one for her. Ava asks if it’s ticking. Nelle says it’s not a bomb, but will make Carly’s head explode. I can’t wait to see that.

Drew tells Oscar that he mapped out Cougar Mountain. Oscar is excited, since he’s wanted to go there. He says it could take all day, and Drew says that’s why he brought food from Kelly’s to hold them over until they have his mom’s famous chili.

Kim tells Julian about the hike. She looks at her phone, and sees that thunderstorms are on the way, with possible winds. She says Drew could walk through them without batting an eye, but what if Oscar won’t complain because Drew will think he’s a wimp? Julian doubts Drew will drag him through a storm. It’s one of those moments she needs to trust them.

Michael asks Sonny if he should be worried. Sonny says he keeps thinking Carly will be okay and figure it out. Michael asks what’s going on; he knows she’s seeing Doc. Sonny says she swears she’s seeing things and people who aren’t there. She checked out neurologically, so the next step was going to Doc. He gave her some anti-anxiety meds, but Sonny doesn’t think they’re working. He says it has to do with Michael’s brother, and Michael asks if she thinks he’s still there. Sonny says that’s where it’s headed; he thinks she’s crumbling. Michael says grief doesn’t have a timetable. Sonny says with a loss like Morgan, anything can set it off.

Carly tells Nelle the pills are to relax; she’s been wound up lately. Josslyn is like, no kidding, and Carly says she’s taking care of it. She asks how Josslyn is doing, and Josslyn says she’s excited for Nelle’s baby shower. Carly says her too. Josslyn says she thought Carly was sucking it up. Carly says she’s going to the shower, and Josslyn suggests she work on her facial expressions, so she doesn’t look like she’s dying a slow death at the Quartermaines. Carly says Nelle doesn’t make it easy. Josslyn asks, what did she do now?

Ava thinks she’ll stick with her own gift, but Nelle insists on the one she brought. She even has a card. All Ava has to do is put her name on it. Ava asks if it will disappear. She asks what it is, but Nelle says she’ll know soon enough. Ava doesn’t like it. Nelle says she doesn’t have to; just do it. Ava assumes she has no choice, and Nelle says not like she did when she took the picture of the medical test. She asks what Ava is doing with the information anyway? Ava says it doesn’t matter now that Nelle is blackmailing her. Nelle says Ava will get Avery back, and she’ll get Michael back after she takes down his mother. It will be epic. Ava asks what she has in store for Carly.

Josslyn can’t understand why Carly is questioning Nelle’s motives with the guardianship. Carly says Nelle wants to look good in front of Michael. Josslyn says, so what? Even if that’s the case, isn’t it a good thing? Carly says, of course, and Josslyn tells her everybody wins. Carly says Michael doesn’t win, but Josslyn says he’s an adult about to be a father, and can make his own decisions. One of them may be get back together with Nelle. Carly asks why she’s saying that, and Josslyn says she ran into Nelle, who said they’re making progress. She asks if it would really be the worst thing, and Carly says it would. Josslyn says they could be a family. Carly wants to call Michael, and Josslyn tells her that Nelle isn’t the devil. Carly says she’s the closest thing to it. Josslyn reminds Carly that Nelle saved her life. It’s Nelle’s kidney in her body. She’s there because of Nelle. Would it kill Carly to see some good? People change all the time. Maybe Nelle realized she made a mistake and is genuinely sorry. Josslyn asks Carly to please try for her, and Carly says she’d do anything for her.

Sonny says amazing as was when Jason came home, and Michael finishes that Carly thinks a miracle happened with Morgan. It’s not rational. Sonny says, no, but as a parent, you can’t control the emotions around you. He has to be patient, hope she figures out that it’s just wishful thinking and goes back to normal. Whatever she’s going through is also escalating her war with Nelle.

Nelle tells Ava that Carly stopped by the Quartermaine’s, offering to help with the shower; it was so fake. Ava suggests she might have been trying to build a bridge, but Nelle says, no. She’d reached out to Carly and Sonny, giving them guardianship in case something happened to her and Michael. Of course Carly took it all wrong. The moment Nelle raised the subject, it was also painfully obvious that Carly had talked to a lawyer about custody. Ava says they’re skilled at that, and Nelle says, screw them; she’s fighting back. Ava asks what she’s planning, but Brad walks in. He tells them about the adoption being final. He and Lucas should be getting the baby around the same time Nelle’s arrives. Ava says she has work to do, but Brad says he’s actually there to see her.

Kim tells Julian that she won’t call Drew, and trust he’ll do what’s best for Oscar. She’s not used to sharing a kid. Julian says she’s doing great, and she calls him a liar. Lucas asks if Kim has a second. Julian asks how things are going with the baby, and Lucas says, all systems go. Julian wishes he’d been there when his children were being born; he missed all the firsts. He says he’ll do everything in his power to prove worthy of being the baby’s grandfather. Lucas barely acknowledges him, and confers with Kim. Julian looks dejected.

Drew tells Oscar there are thunderstorms in the forecast, but hopefully, they’ll miss them. Oscar gets up, and is obviously in pain. Drew asks if he’s okay, and Oscar says he needs to tell him something. Drew asks what’s going on? Clearly, he got hurt. Oscar tells him that he twisted his knee rehearsing for the Nurses’ Ball. Drew probably thinks he’s an idiot. Drew says, no, and Oscar says he didn’t want to miss the hike; he thought he could stretch it out. Drew says they’ll do it another time. He checks Oscar’s knee and thinks it’s okay, but he needs to see a doctor. He suggests calling Kim, and Oscar says she’ll freak. He asks if they can hang for a little bit and talk. Dew sits, and asks what he’d like to talk about. Oscar says, anything; life. Drew tells him that’s a broad topic, and asks if he can narrow it down. Oscar says this was a bad idea. Drew says he’s no life expert, but has lived more years than Oscar, and can give him what he’s got. Oscar says he just doesn’t remember most of it.

Julian asks Lucas to let him know when the baby is born, and Lucas says he’ll keep him in the loop. Kim asks if Julian is okay, and Julian says, never better. She can’t imagine how hard it must be, and he says he should be getting used to it. She says she doesn’t think you get used to being shut out of your kids’ lives. She tells him that he’s going to turn it around, and he says he believes her; tell Lucas and Sam. Kim says she’s the worst. She should be counting her blessings instead of complaining. Julian says she has every right to want to protect Oscar. She thinks maybe she’s being overprotective.

Brad tells Ava that Lucas was raving about a duck painting, and he thought he could surprise him with it for the nursery. Ava says it was so big, she couldn’t keep it at the gallery. She can get it, but it’s expensive. Brad asks if there isn’t a friends and family discount. She says she’ll look up the price and see what she can do. Nelle tells Brad it’s overwhelming; who knew you needed all this stuff for a baby? She asks if anyone is throwing them a shower, but Brad says they’re waiting for the baby, since they don’t want to jinx anything. He asks if she’s still loving being pregnant, and she says more every day. She has company all the time, so she’s never lonely. The thought of growing a little person inside her is like a miracle, just like his will be. She says she talks to the baby every night, promising the life she never had, especially two parents in love. He asks if she and Michael are back together, and she says, not yet, but soon. He tells her to go for it. That’s what he did with Lucas, and look at them now.

Michael tells Sonny they shouldn’t care if Nelle is being manipulative; take the gift and run. Sonny agrees. Michael says Carly has every right to hate Nelle, but this isn’t like her. Sonny says Nelle isn’t the problem right now. Carly is suddenly there, and asks if they were going to say she’s the problem. Nelle is being attacked by big, bad Carly? She can’t believe this is going on right now.

Kim tells Julian she has a great kid; she got lucky. She’s trusted him to make his own choices, and they’ve been good for the most part. She wants Oscar to have relationship with father, but they’re so different. Drew is super macho, and Oscar’s… not like that. Julian says that sometimes fathers and sons are different, because he’s quite the philosopher. She says in the beginning, Oscar was worried Drew wouldn’t like him, since they have nothing in common. That’s when they were strangers, and now Oscar idolizes him; she can tell. Julian asks what she’s concerned about, and she says, what if Oscar starts putting pressure on himself to be more like Drew? She knows it sounds absurd, but Julian says it doesn’t.

Oscar tells Drew it would be cool if he remembered when he was fifteen. Drew asks if Oscar and Josslyn are… and Oscar says not yet. Drew asks if they’ve talked about it, but he says they’re not there yet. It would be nice if he could get advice from his dad though. Drew apologizes for not having any experiences to draw from; he wishes he did. This seems absurd, since Drew could either check out Jason’s experiences or just make intelligent suggestion. Oscar asks if there’s anyone out there who could help him get his memory back, and Drew says the man who performed the initial procedure. Oscar asks if he can un-perform it, and Drew says it’s risky, but possible. Oscar asks if he can he reach out, not just for him, but for himself. Wouldn’t he like to know who he is? Drew says he would. He’s thought about it quite a bit, but there were obstacles in the way. He wants the people he loves to know who he is. Maybe it’s time to give it another shot.

Brad’s eyes pop out when he sees the price of the painting. Ava says it’s with a generous 20% discount. The painter was named one of the top ten up and comers, and it would be a nice investment. Brad says, so would robbing a bank. There’s no way they can afford it. He thanks her anyway, and appreciates the discount. She says any friend of Nelle’s is a friend of hers. Brad says he’s also family. Ava goes in the back, and Nelle tells Brad that she’s having a rough day; boyfriend troubles. She tells him that he can register the painting for when they have a shower. Brad says she’s going to be drowning in loot between the Corinthos family and the Quartermaines. She would love for the family to accept her. She’s trying hard, but can’t make a dent. Carly doesn’t like her, and likes even less that she loves Michael. Brad tells her to keep chipping away. He asks where she’s registered, so he can get a gift. She tells him his gift can be coming to the shower. It would be nice to see a friendly face there besides Josslyn and Monica. She tells him it’s this afternoon, and he asks if it makes him a loser that his schedule is completely open. She says she’ll see him there, and he leaves. Ava asks how far she’s taking things with Carly today, and Nelle says by the time the shower is over, Carly is going to be exposed for the raving lunatic she is.

Carly asks if Sonny and Michael talk behind her back a lot. Michael says she doesn’t seem like herself, and she says she’s not losing it. Sonny tells her that no one is saying that. They’re family, and when things get tough, they help each other. Michael says he’s right; she can’t seem to get her footing with Nelle. Carly says she’s started. She offered to help with the shower, and they had a civil conversation. Michael tells her, good luck today, and they’ll talk after. He leaves, and Sonny says it’s good she reached out to Nelle. Carly tells him that he doesn’t have to worry about her, but he says, too late.

Sonny asks how Carly is feeling, and she says, good; the pills working, and she’s more relaxed. She’s not even dreaming about Morgan, but she misses that. She can’t wait to get back on track. Sonny suggests after she’s done with the shower, she take a trip to Puerto Rico. The repairs on the house are finished, and she can do her therapy over the phone. He has to take care of setting up a caregiver for Mike, but when he’s done, what better way fix what’s broken? She says, no problem can’t be solved by a day on the beach. Think what a week or month could do.

Nelle looks at the blanket she’s been knitting, and says, not bad. if says so herself. Ava asks what the deal with the blanket is, and Nelle tells her, have patience; all will be revealed soon. Ava wants to make one thing clear, Nelle can blackmail her all she wants, but if Avery is in the line of fire, they’re out of there. Nelle says she would never hurt or put an innocent child in danger. The same way Ava wouldn’t hurt a kid who’s bipolar. She knows where to cause the maximum pain. Ava tells her to be careful, and Nelle asks why? Carly doesn’t know who’s haunting her. Ava asks if this has to do with the blanket or the disappearing ink. What the hell is going on?

Michael asks Josslyn if it’s weird for him to get a present for his own baby. She thinks it’s sweet, and Nelle will too. Josslyn asks what the odds are of their mom enjoying the shower, and he says, none.

In the park, Brad tells Lucas about the baby shower, but Lucas has to work. Brad says Lucas really seems torn up about it. Lucas says he can’t forgive what Nelle did to his sister, and Brad says his family can hold a grudge. Lucas says he forgave Brad, didn’t he? Michael and Josslyn join them. Josslyn is excited about the adoption. She knows they’re not celebrating yet, but she has a gift for all the expectant dads. She hands each of them an envelope. Inside is a certificate for free babysitting from her.

Julian tells Kim to keep doing what she’s doing. She loves her son, and if he follows in his father’s footsteps, don’t fight him, just be supportive; she’s good at it. Drew brings Oscar in, and Oscar tells her, don’t freak. Drew says everything is okay, and Oscar adds that he twisted his knee at rehearsal. She asks why he didn’t tell her. Drew says it’s not bad, and he didn’t make it worse by hiking. She thanks God for small favors. Drew apologizes for not calling right away; they were having a good talk. Kim says it’s okay; he checked Oscar out. He’s not a doctor, but he’s seen his fair share of injuries. He points out that she’s white knuckling the chart in her hands, and she says, okay; she freaked out a little, but should get points for not biting his head off. He says she gets them, and it’s a vast improvement. Julian says he’s heading out, and Oscar goes to get an x-ray.

Drew calls Andre. He wants Andre to try and reverse the procedure. He wants his memories back.

Lucas promises Brad it’s no jinx. Michael tells Josslyn, good luck. He has the feeling she’ll need it.

Carly tells Sonny she’s going to the shower. He says it’s her last chance to bail, but she says she’s going to be the doting grandmother. He says she’s the hottest grandma he’s seen, and she says him too. He tells her that he’s gramps twice over, but she says he’ll never be gramps on her watch. After the shower, it’s surf and sand.

Nelle isn’t giving Ava any details in case of plausible implication. Ava says if Nelle implicates her, Carly’s demons unleashed will be nothing. Nelle says between that, and Sonny dealing with his father, Ava will have sole custody in no time. They’re on the same team. Ava says they’re not teammates; they’re worlds apart. Nelle says that Sonny will always despise Ava, and when Avery grows up, he’ll tell her about what Ava has done. Whereas, she, Michael, and the baby will have a life filled with nothing but joy. Ava says, don’t count on it.

Tomorrow, Finn makes a pact with Alexis, Ava tells Nelle that she’s not doing well so far, and Sonny asks Max if he’s screwed.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Tinsley calls her mom while she waits for Carole to have lunch.

Dorinda tells LuAnn she doesn’t know what to expect on the trip to Puerto Rico.

Bethenny checks everything for the trip. She says everyone asks to come, but Dorinda showed actual interest. In her interview, she hopes Dorinda will tell everyone how dire it is, and they’ll want to get involved. she says it’s going to be intense.

Tinsley talks about Scott coming for Christmas, and Carole arrives. Carole is wearing pajamas with a belt and I’m not feeling it. She gives a really complicated egg order, and, much to the relief of the waitress, Tinsley gets avocado toast. Carole wants to hear the deets on Scott’s visit. Tinsley says she’s never gotten a surprise like that. In her interview, Tinsley says they hadn’t been in a good place, but as soon as she saw him, all was well. Carole is thinking of making a full break with Adam. He told her he went on a date with someone and liked her. In her interview, she says it was the most awkward phone call ever. They had an unspoken spoken agreement (whatever that means) after slipping back into a relationship. Tinsley asks if they’ve talked. In her interview, Carole says in Adam’s mind, he was being respectful, but in hers, it was, are you kidding me? She thinks his idea of a break-up was still having her in his life in all ways, including sex. Tinsley thinks maybe it’s better to have a clean break.

The real estate broker comes by Sonja’s. Even though she’s renting, not selling, Sonja still has some letting go to do. The broker says her tone is beautiful, but other people might not think so. She’s hoping to get $32K a month, and the broker tells her to make sure to fix every detail. In her interview, Sonja says it’s more work than she anticipated before she can even show it. She wishes she could just twitch her nose.

Dorinda tells Bethenny that she’s been excited for days. In her interview, Dorinda says it was a surprise. All the nonsense has dissipated, and they’re concentrating on being friends. We flash back to when they weren’t so friendly. Bethenny explains how she got to this point with the volunteer work. No one had come, FEMA hadn’t come (no surprise), and everyone was broke; it was a zoo. She says all the relief is donated, and the cash cards are strictly for the people, and it will be going back into the economy. Dorinda doesn’t know how it’s possible to disperse so much in such a short time.

Tinsley, Ramona, and Carole get manicures. Carole says she’s the glue that holds the combo together. Tinsley tells Ramona why she couldn’t come to the party for Carole. Ramona says a boyfriend is the best reason not to. She tells Tinsley about Sonja’s behavior at the party. Sonja didn’t like Ramona saying she was closer to Carole, and she seems to be alienating everyone. In her interview, Ramona says they’ve always had a special bond. She hopes Sonja can make things better with herself and everyone else. Ramona tells them about Bethenny taking Dorinda to Puerto Rico, and Carole says she would have gone if Bethenny had asked. Ramona is surprised she wasn’t invited, especially since it’s up Carole’s alley. Carole says she just made a big donation, and everyone supports in different ways. In her interview, Ramona says it’s like watching a couple get divorced. Carole feels Bethenny and Dorinda are developing a stronger friendship, but in her interview, she wonders what’s going on. She says it’s all good, and she’s happy to support in other ways.

Bethenny welcomes Dorinda to her warehouse. She introduces Michael, her charity partner. The total will be more than ten million pounds. Michael was a skabillionaire who now does charity work. He’s coordinating all the relief. In her interview, Bethenny says she begged people for planes. Michael calls it a little FEMA. I hope they’re better than that. In her interview, Bethenny says no one knows what she’s doing, and it’s maddening. She’s up all night on the internet. They go over some maps, and Dorinda says they’re going to some really remote parts. Bethenny is glad she could bring someone from “her other life,” so it seems real.

LuAnn meets daughter Victoria for dinner. In her interview, she says she’d traveling with Tom and her life revolved around him. Now she can reconnect with her children. She says Victoria supports and doesn’t judge her. She tells Victoria about looking for a new place. Victoria asks if she was ever comfortable at Tom’s apartment, and LuAnn says not really. It was very much a bachelor pad, despite her touches. She says, in retrospect… why did she have to get married? Victoria says it was fast. LuAnn doesn’t regret it, and says things happen for a reason. She has some good memories. In her interview, LuAnn says nothing was working in their marriage. They were arguing and drinking too much. She couldn’t take the suffering, insecurity, and not feeling like she had a partner. She went in quick, and got out quick. Victoria says she told Tom that he’s superficial, and it’s hard to know him; he doesn’t know how to hug. She and LuAnn hug.

Dorinda meets Bethenny and her core group for dinner. In her interview, Bethenny says they all work 24/7 and get paid nothing. Bethenny goes over what they need to do tomorrow. Dorinda says what Bethenny has done is amazing, but Bethenny says it’s what they’ve all done. In her interview, Bethenny says they’d been drinking earlier, and thinks Dorinda did a pregame; she’s wasted. Yep, she is. They’re using subtitles. In her interview, Bethenny asks if this is the night to go off the rails before 7 pm. The operations director talks about a kid needing gas for a generator to power a ventilator, and how they solved it. Michael tells them about a tent city in Haiti, and how they’ve been hands on. Dorinda says you have to get down in the home front to make things happen. Michael says they’ve had amazing progresses, and people are going to college now. Dorinda argues with him about that. Bethenny says he would know, since he’s been going there. In her interview, Bethenny says, wtf? She’s embarrassed. All they’ve done is good, so why is Dorinda on them? Dorinda says Haiti is still in a bad place, and Bethenny says that’s no reason to give up. Dorinda brings up Richard, and how she traveled with him doing good deeds, but it didn’t matter. Bethenny suggests that if she feels hopeless, maybe she shouldn’t come tomorrow. Dorinda asks if she doesn’t want her, and Bethenny says not the way she’s acting. Dorinda says she was happy to come and Bethenny always ruins everything. She storms out, and there are crickets at the table.

Michael says he knows Bethenny’s heart is in it, and to do whatever she wants, but he doesn’t think Dorinda is going to change; she de. Bethenny says she was married to a guy who was slightly political and powerful, and probably thought she should contribute to the conversation, and she’d been drinking. She has compassion for Dorinda, and says she really does want to help. No doubt, she’ll regret it in the morning. In her interview, Bethenny says Dorinda will wake up tomorrow and regret this, but she’ll be there on time and ready to go. She texts Dorinda, saying it was a weird night, and to come tomorrow.

Sonja is meeting with a photographer at the townhouse, and needs to hide her prescriptions, vibrators, and things she didn’t even know she should hide. The broker arrives with him, and Sonja says her housekeeper couldn’t make It, and sorry it’s cluttered. The broker says Travis is the best, and they’ll work around it. In her interview, Sonja says since she’s met with the broker, she doesn’t look at her place with the same eyes. It looks dirty, or used, or old. I refrain from making numerous jokes. Sonja doesn’t want it to look unappetizing. She tells them that this is contributing to her anxiety, and she just wants it over. In her interview, she says photographer Travis is another story. She asks who he’s dating, and he says he’s married. She tells him that he ruined her day. They go out on the patio, and Sonja has left dog poopy on a stool – or stool on a stool, if you will – for the housekeeper to pick up. This makes me wonder why she couldn’t just get rid of it wherever it’s supposed to go, since she picked it up anyway. Travis does what all good real estate photographers do, and makes everything look inviting, clean, and bigger than it really is. We find out Travis is married to a man, and this makes Sonja feel better. She asks if he’s sure he’s not bisexual.

The next morning, Bethenny brings out the duffel bag of cash cards, saying it feels like she’s carrying bricks. In her interview, she says Dorinda just smiled at her like nothing happened, but she doesn’t want to bring it up. Dorinda feels badly about not having a good night, but she’d had a long day, was anxious, and shouldn’t have been drinking. She says it is what it is, and she’s all about the new day.

They get on a plane. In her interview, Bethenny says she doesn’t want to bring it up; it’s not her place, but Dorinda’s behavior is not okay. After they get settled in, Bethenny tells Dorinda not to get her fur up, but she goes to a sixteen out of ten, and sometimes treats her worse than Ramona does. She gives Dorinda slack because she’s a drunk. Yes, she said that. Dorinda says she isn’t, but she can’t not eat and drink. Bethenny says she gets mean when she drinks, and Dorinda says she has a lot going on in her life. Bethenny says, they all do. Dorinda tells Bethenny that her frustrations come up and intensify; it’s something she has to work on. She says she has to apologize, and Bethenny says she has to not drink. Dorinda doesn’t think she’s an alcoholic, but uses it as an excuse to behave badly. In her interview, Dorinda says Bethenny likes to label people, and it’s not fair or accurate. Bethenny has had her moments, and one night doesn’t define someone. Maybe not, but what about a hundred nights?

Bethenny says Dorinda has been talking about Richard more. Maybe it’s because Dennis reminds her of him. Dorinda says Dennis is so much like him. She says, at one point, it was real, and she thought it was forever. The life she has isn’t the life she expected. Ha! Welcome to the club, sister. She thinks that’s why it triggered so much when Sonja talked about her divorce. We flash back to Sonja being clueless and insensitive at LuAnn’s lunch. Dorinda says that person still has the option of seeing him walk through the door. Bethenny says Dorinda has more of a chance of seeing her late husband walk through the door, than Sonja does seeing her ex. She screwed up and she knows it. In her interview, Bethenny thinks Dorinda needs a full-time relationship. If she only sees her man half the time, she spends the other have thinking about Richard.

Dorinda says the things she appreciated are over. She was good at being a wife and mother. Bethenny says she can still be a wife, and thinks her saying she doesn’t want to get married again is a defense mechanism. She asks what John would say about her seeing other people. Dorinda says she’s okay with living alone, but sometimes wonders if anyone would find her if she died. She wonders if she needs an I’ve-fallen-and-I-can’t-get-up necklace. In her interview, she says, life is hard; trying to keep it together and be a strong woman and mother is hard. She misses her old life, when she came home to a person who had her back. She tells Bethenny, as bad as it was with Richard dying, she grew so much. The person standing by his coffin is not the person she is today. Maybe the person who met John isn’t the same person today. Yes! Get rid of him. The free dry-cleaning isn’t worth it. Exhibiting amazing control and subtlety, Bethenny says maybe she needs a different partner. Dorinda says she doesn’t think so. She’s fulfilled in the relationship. How? Why? In her interview, Dorinda says she loves John, but doesn’t know why she won’t make a commitment to move in. Part of her misses it, but part of her is afraid of doing it again. That’s because he’s a slob who doesn’t deserve you – i.e. the wrong guy. Dorinda tells Bethenny she thinks she needs therapy. Bethenny thinks that’s a good idea. I’ll accept it in lieu of her dumping John. They hug.

Next time, Bethenny passes out the money cards, Carole talks #meetoo, Sonja recruits LuAnn and Ramona to work on her place, and Carole tells Bethenny to get off her jock.

Star

Natalie got fired, and suggested Maurice sign Alex before someone else does. He didn’t want to mess with Carlotta’s girls, but approached Alex anyway. Alex had to leave, but said she’s be back in time for Take 3’s live TV performance. Star gave Jackson’s music to Maurice. Maurice (who’s having a busy week) tried to create friction between Star and Alex, but she told him to stay out of Take 3’s business. Ayanna said Alex was hot, so she bumped Angel and Andy for Take 3 on the tour. Jaden needed blood donations, but Latisha didn’t want Cotton involved. She relented when Jahil said he’d need it from all the family.

Angel and Andy decided to split up to get out of their contract with Jahil. Angel told Jahil that he was dead to him. Andy got it on with Brandi Cassie. Since he was out of a job, she tried to give him some cash, but he wasn’t interested, so she gave him a side job of delivering a car. Alex was late, and Ayanna dropped Take 3 from the TV show, saying if Alex showed up, she could sing Noah’s new track with him. Star wondered why Alex was getting rewarded with a solo for being late. Noah didn’t want to debut his new music, but Carlotta told him that he’d better get ready, and took his liquor away. Maurice encouraged Star to do what she could to stand out.

Andy delivered the car for Cassie, but it was really a drug deal, the drugs hidden in the body of the car. When he brought the money back to Cassie, she said she gave him the opportunity to earn. He said she gave him the opportunity to be a drug mule. While she was out of the room, Andy scooped up a couple of stacks of money, and split.

Jaden asked Jahil if he was going to die, and Jahil said he wouldn’t let that happen, finalizing things with a fist bump. The doctor gave the bad news that Jaden needed to be on dialysis. His kidneys were shutting down, and unfortunately, none of the family was a match for a kidney. Cotton blamed Carlotta for Jaden’s illness. Cotton tried to be a man, and got with Latisha for her. Now her son is about to die because she tried to be something she wasn’t

Alex arrived in the nick of time, but couldn’t find her mic. That’s because Star had it, and took her place in the duet with Noah. BTW, Star’s hoop earrings rivaled Lala’s from Vanderpump Rules. After the son, Alex smacked Star, and called her garbage. Carlotta asked how many more people she had to hurt. Angel told Simone everything leads back to Jahil. He grew up idolizing him, and now can’t trust him; he can’t trust anybody. Simone said he could trust her. He told her that she keeps a lot inside, and she explained that her foster father, Otis, abused her. Angel told her that he loved her.

After Star’s performance, Natalie encouraged Maurice to sign Star instead of Alex. Maurice said he loved Carlotta, and Natalie asked if he was willing to sacrifice his career. She said Star was capable of delivering the world to him. Noah admitted to Star that he was wasted when he wrote the song. When he leaves, the paparazzi swamp him, but he said Star just filled in. No one can replace Alex.

Carlotta told Noah he needed rehab, and Ayanna told him that he was one step closer to a national tour; keep doing what he’s doing. Simone and Angel started to get busy in the trailer, but were interrupted by the delivery of a letter from immigration. Angel’s application was denied, and he had to show up in court.

Alex asked Jackson for his track, telling him she no longer cared how Star felt; it was business. Maurice talked Star into putting her performance with Noah online, telling her it was time to see what the world thinks.

Cassie went to the dealer’s garage, bringing Andy with her. She believed she was short-changed, and shot the dealer, killing him. Andy was just a little freaked out.

Tonight’s cavalcade of Queen Latifah‘s wigs included a blunt, above-the-shoulder cut with bangs, and silver and gold highlights; some smooth waves with deep auburn highlights; a side-swept short bob with purple highlights; and my favorite, a curly, swirly magenta updo. Miss Lawrence also did not disappoint, sporting a geometric cut in blue.

Next time, Simone quits, Jahil has big plans, and there’s a drive by.

👽 I saw Kim D on Botched. In a nutshell, her breasts were effed up. She should have just left them the way they were, since they matched the rest of her.

🙅 Why There’s a Bad Seed in Port Charles:

https://www.abc.soapsindepth.com/posts/general-hospital-hayley-erin-patty-mccormack-159738?utm_medium=email&utm_source=SailthruHorizonDaily&utm_content=13164513&utm_campaign=ABCsid_ed_Newsletter_engaged_weekly%202018-05-09&utm_term=Master_ABCsid_sitesignups

😀 Because It’s Funny…

And what you get when you put “Midweek Meme” in google images.

CatPlotting

DannyTrejo

PugDreams

May 7, 2018 – Franco Meets with Steve, VanderReunion, a Small Ramble & a Bad Seed

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

At the door of the Quartermaine mansion, Carly says she can do this. Monica answers, saying it’s an unexpected pleasure. It’s an unexpected Monica too, since she’s temporarily being played by Patty McCormack of Bad Seed fame. Monica asks if she and Carly had a breakfast appointment, but Carly say she’s accepting Monica’s information to co-host the baby shower. Nelle joins them, and Carly says she feels strongly about giving her a fitting tribute.

Ava tells Griff how Avery didn’t shed a tear when she dropped her off at school. He says Avery sounds like an independent lady already. Ava can’t believe Avery is with her, and tomorrow she’ll get to do it again. She assumes he’s still thinking she went too far to make this miracle happen. Griff says he’s happy Avery is with her, no matter how she accomplished it. The timing works out too. Ava asks for what, and he says, for him to move out.

Franco is procrastinating before he goes to meet Steve. He tells Elizabeth that he’s decades late, so avoiding him for another fifteen minutes won’t matter. He says it’s also Jake’s birthday, but Elizabeth tells him that the best present he can give Jake is himself, cleared of his demons. The sooner he leaves, the sooner he’s home. They have lots to celebrate.

Kim goes to Charlie’s. She wants to talk about Kelly’s with Julian. He asks if she means when she blew him off to have lunch with Drew. She says he deliberately brought up Sam with Drew. Julian apologizes, saying he was in a mood. Seeing her with Drew brought out worst in him. She says she didn’t love it, and hopes it won’t happen again. Alexis walks in, and asks, why was she summoned before her second cup of coffee?

Jason brings a birthday gift to Elizabeth’s house. She calls Jake downstairs, telling Jason that he’s home with a stomach ache. Jake says, hi, and Jason says, hey. I see the apple didn’t fall far from the tree when it comes to conversation.

Franco meets Steve at Kelly’s. Steve says he almost didn’t show, and Franco says it’s something else they have in common. They introduce themselves, and shake hands.

Curtis asks if Alexis is on board, and Jordan says they’re walking a fine line. Alexis is clueless, and Molly tells her the reconstruction of Charles Street is taking forever. Kim says the people can’t begin to cover their medical expenses either. Curtis says they have to put the pressure on. Alexis asks why she’s there. Stella says she’s a lawyer, and they’re going to sue their britches off.

Ned tells Olivia-Q that he promised a new day for Port Charles, but instead, got a nightmare. The repairs have barely started, and as mayor, he should do more. Olivia says he can’t coerce the insurance companies to pay up or rebuild it himself. He says the devastation Jim created remains, funds are barely trickling in, and people are hurting. She has something that might boost his outlook.

Ava says Griff doesn’t have to leave because of Avery, and his apartment isn’t ready yet. He tells her that he can get a room. It seems like a logical solution. It was supposed to be a temporary situation, and she needs to get Avery settled. Ava says he’s such a big advocate for honesty; why not be honest? It’s not about Avery or a temporary arrangement. He can’t forgive her for using Mike as leverage. He tells her there’s no sense in rehashing it. She says she apologized for being less than forthcoming, but she’s not sorry. She’s a mother, and did what she had to. Griff say she did what she had to in order to expedite the change in custody. He can’t change it, but doesn’t have to like it. She says he’d told her he accepted her for who she is, and wouldn’t presume to judge her. When did that change?

Monica says she has everything sewn up, but Carly insists on helping. She asks what about desserts? They have a new pastry chef that makes incredible macaroons. Monica says it’s not necessary, but Nelle thinks it would be wonderful. Monica agrees Carly can provide macaroons and will inform Cook 2 to add them to the menu. Nelle says it’s a lovely gesture, and appreciates it, since Carly has every right to hate her. Not just for the past, but for what she did recently as well. She can’t go on treating Carly this way, and has a confession to make.

Elizabeth tells Jake that Jason stopped by to wish him a happy birthday. Jason asks how he’s feeling, and Jake wonders why. Elizabeth says he’s referring to Jake’s reason for being home, and Jake says he’s starting to feel better. Jason asks if there’s a party planned, and Jake says, just family – his mom, brother, Drew, and Franco. Jason gives him a card. Jake says thanks, but doesn’t open it, saying he’ll open it when Drew comes, so he can open everything at the same time. Jason hopes he gets everything he wants and more. Elizabeth asks Jason to stay for a bit, but Jake doesn’t look too sure.

Steve says he knew Jim after Franco did; he was probably his last victim. He doesn’t like using that word, but it’s what they are. Franco says they’re members of a club no one wants to be in. He tells Steve that nobody shed a tear to find out Jim was dead, and Steve says everyone at the office was stunned. He says he was relieved, and explains he works at Niagara Equities; he’s the VP of finance. Franco can’t believe Steve worked for Jim after what he did. He’s not judging, but doesn’t get it. Steve says that’s fair. He’s asked himself the same thing. When he met Jim, he was a kid on the street; no family, no nothing. Jim was good to him – until he wasn’t. He stayed because he didn’t have anything else. It was next to impossible to cut the cord. He couldn’t let go. Franco says he understands what it means more than Steve knows.

Alexis asks who they’re suing, and Stella says Niagara Equities, and the fat cats taking their sweet time repairing the area. Molly suggests staging a protest if they have to. Lucy asks if she can intercept the conversation for a moment. She discourages them from a massive protest, as it will make the property values go down more than they are already. Julian tells her to hold on, and she says it’s funny coming from the one person who had no damage. Kim says Charlie has been generous, confusing Lucy. Alexis explains it’s a nickname, and tells them that they can’t squeeze blood from a turnip.

Ava tells Griff that they both have flaws and weaknesses, but they have strengths too, and should use them to get through the rough patches. They can’t turn tail and run whenever one of them disappoints the other. He says he’s not running. He was disappointed in how she used Mike. He hates seeing her revert – he stops. She finishes, to how she used to be before he saved her. That’s really why he’s leaving. He’s all out of miracles.

Nelle tells Carly that she thought asking her and Sonny to be guardians was a gesture of good will, but as usual, she just managed to upset Carly. Carly says her showing up is a gesture too. Nelle says, like yesterday, how she took Josslyn shopping for the shower gift. Her best intentions only cause more pain. She’d thought naming the baby Morgan would be a good thing; someone Carly loved and could remember. Carly thinks it’s nice that Nelle helped Josslyn to buy her a present. Monica says the present is for the baby, but Carly says it’s for the mama too. Of course she appreciates Nelle making them guardians, but it caused a huge debate, and Michael ripped up the papers. If she chooses to have them redrawn, they’ll step up if something happens to her – God forbid.

Jason asks if Jake is excited about school being almost over. Jake says he is, but he likes school. Jason asks what he’s studying, and Jake says the usual stuff. Elizabeth interjects that his favorite subjects are art and math. Jake says Drew helps him with math, and Franco helps with his art. Elizabeth says he’s a good student. The phone rings, and Elizabeth tells Jake it’s an international call. It’s Spencer, and Jake goes upstairs to talk. Elizabeth asks if Jason is okay. He says, it will take time for them to know each other, and Elizabeth says they will.

Alexis says the rule of thumb in civil court is that if you can’t collect, don’t sue. They’ll have their day in court, and might beat Niagara, but it’s not a slam dunk. Niagara is bankrupt. Curtis says they still have capital, but Alexis says it will take years and cost a fortune. (Or as I would say, get in line behind the rest of the creditors.) Stella asks where people are supposed to live in the meantime – their cars? Molly still likes the idea of a protest. Lucy tells them to keep their options open, and leaves. Julian asks if there’s really nothing they can do, and Alexis says there might be one thing.

Olivia gives Ned her tablet, and says it’s a teaser trailer. If there’s any interest, they can do more. It’s a taste of what the city has to offer. Olivia stands in front of the hospital, and says, welcome to Port Charles, New York, and the many people and places that make it a unique and vibrant community. Inside the hospital she asks Griff about the hospital. Griff looks a little petrified to be on camera, and says the hospital is state of the art, and has an award-winning staff who cares about the people of the city. Olivia goes to Kelly’s, and says sooner or later everyone ends up there. She asks Jordan what she would like the people to know about the city. Jordan says, it’s a place for everyone, culturally and economically diverse, which makes the city richer. Olivia shows off the MetroCourt next, and says Port Charles is a great place to visit, and an even better place to live. She asks Ned what he thinks. He grabs her and says he thinks she’s amazing.

Nelle tells Carly that her help with the shower means so much. They might never be friends, but she hopes for the baby’s sake, they’ll never be enemies. Carly says she wants to make it a memorable occasion. Nelle has to check in with work. She says Ava is working from home, since she’s getting Avery settled. She apologizes, saying she did it again. Carly says she works for Ava, so her name is going to come up. She tells Nelle to give Avery a hug for her and her daddy. Nelle leaves, and Monica asks, what’s the catch? Carly has no idea what she means, and Monica says she shows up brimming with ideas, like she’s Nelle’s BFF. What is she up to?

Griff tells Ava to stop accusing him of saving her soul, and cut the priest references. She says he caught her off guard; what is she supposed to think? They barely said good morning, when he springs this on her. He doesn’t want to leave like this, and she tells him to stay and work it out. Lucy knocks at the door, and Ava tells her to go away. Lucy says it’s in her best interest to open the door, and starts banging on it. Ava says it better be good, and Lucy says it’s about the Nurses’ Ball, and there’s nothing more important. Ava says she gave her contribution already. Lucy remembers, and says she was disappointed. She shows Ava a check with nothing filled in.

Jason complements a picture Jake did, and Elizabeth says Franco helped him. He recognized Jake’s talent early on. She feels that if Jason knew Franco’s whole story… but it’s not her place to give the details. She had faith in him, even when he had none in himself.

Franco tells Steve that he was afraid, and his fear bought his silence. Jim wanted him to keep his mouth shut. He blocked it to the point where he forgot altogether. If he hadn’t done that or stopped Jim, he could have spared Steve and the others. Steve tells Franco that he’s full of crap.

Ava says she wrote it out. The lightbulb comes on over my head when I remember her using Nelle’s pen. Griff leaves, and Lucy hopes she wasn’t interrupting anything. Ava asks if it would make a difference, and she says, heck no. Lucy asks how long they’ve been living together; what’s the deal? Ava says she has a long day, and she’s sure Lucy does too, so Ava doesn’t want to keep her. She gives Lucy another check, and Lucy says she’s going right to the bank. She obviously needs to deposit it right away. She leaves, and Ava looks at the check copies in her checkbook. She says, something’s not right. She takes out the pen. I wonder if she swiped Nelle’s pen, and then wonder if there is such a thing as disappearing ink.

Carly drops her pill bottle, and Monica asks if she’s anxious. Carly asks if Monica is shaming her, and says it’s unbecoming for a doctor. Monica says now the real Carly shows up. Carly says the real Monica too. She knows Monica won’t forgive her about AJ, but he was self-destructive. Monica remembers Carly taking advantage of that, and Carly asks why she’s turning a blind to Nelle. Is she punishing Carly for making her grandchild a Corinthos, by making Carly’s a Quartermaine, even if it means sucking up to a scheming snake? Well, wouldn’t the child be a Quartermaine regardless? It’s not like Monica got Nelle pregnant. Monica says she’s having a shower to celebrate Nelle and the baby. If Carly can’t manage to be civil, she can keep her flowers and macaroons, and stay home. Carly says, wild horses couldn’t keep her away.

Elizabeth asks Jake how Spencer is, and Jake says, great. He told him that Jason was there, and then felt badly because Spencer has no dad, and he has three. Jason tells him to enjoy his birthday, and starts to leave. Jake says he changed his mind. He wants to open Jason’s gift now; he doesn’t want to wait.

Steve thinks Franco wants him to be mad at him. He says he just started therapy, and either he’s a fast learner or Franco is behind. He’s still covering up for Jim, and buying into his lies by making it his fault. He bets that’s what Jim said; Franco is bad and it’s his fault. It was his go-to move, and he probably said it to all of them until Franco and his friend stopped him. Steve did what he needed to survive, and Franco did too. None of it is his fault. Jim is dead. Let what he did die with him. Franco wishes he could, but doesn’t think it’s possible.

Molly says she’ll fill TJ in, and tells Jordan congratulations. Curtis stands behind Jordan, shaking his head. Jordan asks what she’s being congratulated for, and Molly says if her mom’s plan works, they won’t be bothering Jordan. Jordan’s phone rings, and she steps away. Molly tells Curtis that she’s sorry. He tells her no deal has been done yet.

Alexis finds Ned, and he says her timing is perfect. Olivia came up with a plan to revitalize the city. For once they’re on the same page. Alexis doubts it.

Carly asks Griff if he’s alone for breakfast. He says he’s planning on an extended stay. She asks if he finally came to his senses and left Ava.

At Ava’s, Nelle says she’s working on a blanket; something for the shower. Ava says people are supposed to bring gifts to her. Nelle says it’s special. Ava says she has something else that’s special; Nelle’s pen. She shouldn’t leave it around. She asks if it’s part of the plan to bring Carly down, and tells Nelle she used it to write a check, and can’t have it around. Whatever Nelle is up to, Ava is out entirely. Nelle says things have escalated, and she thinks Ava should take a more active role.

Jason has given Jake tickets to a minor league game on Memorial Day. He tells Jake that he can take anyone he wants. Jake thanks him, and asks if he can come. Jason says he wouldn’t miss it.

Franco colors the placemat. He tells Steve that Jim has other victims. Steve says the company lost everything because of the illegal drilling. He tells Franco not to give up. He might be able to help.

Alexis tells Ned and Olivia the video sounds wonderful. She hopes it boosts the city’s economy. Ned will need it to defray legal costs. She assumes he’ll want a jury trial. Ned is perplexed, and she says the people hit the hardest, the residents of Charles Street, are suing the city of Port Charles.

Griff tells Carly that he and Ava are still together, but Avery is living there. Carly says, part time. She says he’s Mike’s doctor. He knew Mike was innocent, and did nothing while Ava charged him with kidnapping. Um… Griff provided the medical records and tried to talk her out of it. That’s not something? Carly says now Sonny has to share Avery to keep Mike out of prison. Avery is spending half her time with the woman who destroyed her brother. Morgan would still be alive if Ava hadn’t tampered with his lithium. The only reason she’s not throwing him out, is that he’d go back to Ava. It makes her smile to know Ava is alone, without the boy toy she got to replace Carly’s son.

Ava tells Nelle she can’t do anything to risk losing Avery. Whatever she’s planned, she’s on her own. Nelle says she might want to rethink that. How would Griff feel to know she took a photo of privileged information. She shows Ava the picture of the DNA test on her phone. Ava calls her an ingrate, reminding Nelle of how she gave her a job when no one else would. She asks how much, and Nelle says she doesn’t want money. She just needs Ava to come to the shower, and bring a present.

Tomorrow, Ned accuses Alexis of wanting to keep herself in the public eye, Lulu talks to Anna about Henrik, and Jason doesn’t want to share his memory or anything else with Drew. Now who’s the baby?

🏆 Congrats to Daytime Emmy winners Chloe Lanier (Nelle) and Vernee Watson (Stella), who received the award for Outstanding Younger Actress and Outstanding Guest Performer, respectively. Once again Todd Roger Howarth was robbed. Not even a nomination. Pfft! Michael Easton (Finn) was nominated, but didn’t win. So double Pfft!

Vanderpump Rules – The Reunion Part One

Giggy! Lisa says she can’t do it without him. Jax hopes there are no casualties. He’s expecting the worst and hoping for the best. I hope Jax is the only casualty, and he already is the worst. Scheana doesn’t know what anyone could possibly come at her for. Tom lets Kristen know her boob is hanging out. At least they’ve graduated from the cheap reunion and aren’t in the Clubhouse anymore.

Andy jumps right to the elephant in the room – Jax and Brittany are together again. Now my stomach is a casualty, since I want to throw up. Scheana is no longer with Rob, and Stassi has a new boyfriend. Lala is still with her man, and Kristen with Carter. Andy asks if James is still with Logan, and he says he’s still with Raquel. Lala is wearing the biggest hoops ever, and Andy says, the bigger the hoop, the better the relationship. I want them. They’re bigger than the ones I was wearing when my boss suggested shooting a basketball through them.

The season began with the revelation that Jax cheated on Brittany with Faith. Jax tells Brittany he loves her before things get nasty. Brittany says they were just talking about having kids, and she’d thought things were going well; everyone had said how much she had helped him to change. He says he put her through the ringer, but didn’t see it. Tom says he was a straight up d*ck, and affected everyone. He and Ariana had their worst argument ever. Andy asks about them having sex while a 95-year-old woman was in the room. (In case you’re out of the loop, Faith was supposed to be looking after an old lady when she was having sex with Jax.) Jax says it looked like an old woman’s house, but he didn’t know an old woman was in it. Andy asks why he did it. Because he’s Jax, you twit, and the most awful person in the universe. Jax says they’d been arguing a lot, and his way of getting out of a relationship is cheating. Instead of being an adult and getting help, he takes the cowardly way out. He says it could have been anyone; whoever was paying attention to him. Brittany says that’s effed up, since she was paying attention to him. Andy asks Schwartz why he has such blind loyalty to Jax. He says Jax was instrumental in his transition to LA. Jax says he never felt bad and had no conscience. Andy asks about Brittany’s trip to Vegas, and why she came back to Jax. Brittany says it was an emotional thing.

We move on to Lala. Andy asks why she wanted to come back. Lala says she felt thrown into a group who’d been together for a long time. Scheana reached out, and she felt it was a safe place for the first time. Ariana says people can see who she is now. Scheana says she keeps getting sh*t by Lala, and the tone-deaf thing was rude. Maybe, but true. Lala says she didn’t make her sing. Tom says she made fun of his trumpet playing too. We see a clip of her saying it’s like baby dolphins trying to communicate for the first time. Then we see a clip of Tom playing the trumpet, and she’s right. Scheana says Lala has a different tone in interviews. Lala tells Scheana that she only knows how to talk about herself.

Andy says Logan is the third person to say he’s been with James, that James denies. He asks if James has ever hooked up with Logan, but James says he’s never dipped in the man pool. If people want to think that, fine. Kristen thinks where there’s smoke, there’s fire. James mentions having sex with Kristen on the hood of his Beamer and how she denied it, and gets accused of deflection. James says he knows where he’s dipped his willy.

Stassi says it was horrifying to watch her and Patrick. Ariana tells her that she looked amazing, and he looked disgusting. Tom thought it was crazy that Patrick had a no contact rule when he went to Amsterdam with no contact, and how he got pissed when she didn’t text him in Mexico. Schwartz says it was toxic, and it broke his heart to see her neutralized. Lisa says Stassi has been unhappy the entire time, and she didn’t think it was the right relationship. When watching the show, Stassi saw Patrick saying he’d be okay if she banged other guys; she just couldn’t date them. She says she wished she’d known; she would have had some fun. They talk about Patrick’s use of big words. Andy asks if Jax ever had the curiosity to look up anything, but he’s good. Andy lists names viewers have called Patrick, and Jax knows those words. Stassi says she didn’t recognize herself; she was submissive. Ariana says her ex went for the jugular more, but Stassi lived with the manipulation. She’s glad they’re both out of that. Stassi is sorry she wasted time, but Ariana says it was a learning experience. Stassi says she’s learned she wants to live her life honestly and be with someone who accepts her.

Andy asks Ariana what caused the dry spell. She says she was uncomfortable with herself, and they weren’t building intimacy. Then we get totally TMI about their sex life, and I go ♫ La-la-la! ♫ Andy asks Lisa what it’s like seeing someone as beautiful as Ariana be so self-conscious. Ariana gets all weird about being called beautiful. She says things are better now, and they’re working toward getting to the best in an honest way. I have no clue what that means. Andy asks if she regrets talking about it. She says sometimes, but not when people contact her who’ve been in the same boat.

Jax’s dad passed away from cancer last December. Jax says they spoke every day. He’d just talked to him, and got the call from is mom after Christmas. They were on their way to dinner, and he was in the car when he got the call. He pulled over, and Brittany took over. Ever since then, he can’t imagine himself without her. I have marginal feels for Jax with this, since I was close to my father, who passed away suddenly just before I got married. He says the guys came to Florida. Stassi, Kristen, and Rachel also went. Stassi says she couldn’t not go. Scheana say she would have. Andy says the girls have two things in common; they hate him, but they showed up anyway. He asks what’s biggest thing Jax learned about Brittany. He says she literally took charge, after everything he’d put her through. Brittany says she loves him and his family. He says it’s the worst thing that’s happened to him, but their relationship is the best it’s been. It’s his first funeral. He never knew someone who died. I’m glad their moving on, since I don’t want to feel badly for Jax, and this is sad.

Andy says TomTom is the fourth restaurant/bar in the Vanderpump empire, and asks Lisa why the Toms? She says she adores them, and they add great energy to the equation. Andy asks if Tom is at the grown-up table yet, and he says he’s getting there. Schwartz says they’re not having idea sex yet, but there’s been foreplay. Tom tells Lisa that sometimes décor should be second to functionality. Ken is talking about buying a wine fridge, and Tom doesn’t believe it will bring in revenue. Schwartz says they’re investors, ambassadors, and promoters. Lisa supports that, but needs them to do what they’re good at. At five percent, they’re very junior partners. Tom says the restaurant didn’t need to cost so much, and Lisa says it was her choice. She thinks she knows what she’s doing. She says she hasn’t cashed the checks yet, and Andy asks if it’s fair to hold it over them. Lisa says she isn’t. She wants their involvement, but not if they’re unhappy. She says a partnership is like a marriage. Andy asks if there’s a formal contract, and Lisa says just a handshake. She never had one with Guillermo either. Tom says they’ll figure everything out in the next few weeks. Jax asks if this shouldn’t have bene talked about before the handshake. Lisa says she’s giving them the opportunity to invest. Tom says their names do have value, or she wouldn’t have named the restaurant after them. Lisa says, of course. Andy asks if they’re worried they won’t like her choices. Lisa says she has the reputation for creating beautiful restaurants, and if they don’t like it, they can suck it. That she says this with a British accent, actually makes it pleasant sounding. And of course, Lisa can do no wrong, being the patron saint of dogs. Andy asks Jax if he was jealous about the venture, and he says not after hearing all this. Andy asks Tom if Lisa should take him seriously after he drank fireball before a meeting. Tom says he can handle himself in those situations, but probably not.

Andy says the Vegas trip was interesting. He commends Brittany on her pregnancy scare prank. He asks if they use contraception, because why not? Jax looks at Brittany like he doesn’t know the answer. Katie says she’ll explain how babies are made. What they’re doing makes babies. Jax says after his father’s death, he’s ready to have kids. Andy asks Stassi if she thinks he’d be a good dad. Stassi says she’s noticed he’s changed; not a 180, but different. She thinks he’d step up. Jax says if could take something good out of it, it’s to be the dad his father was, and the person he was. Dammit! There are tears in my eyes, and I hate Jax even more for doing this to me.

Scheana is doing her Sex Tips… play in Vegas, and Andy asks how it is to be single there.. Scheana says it’s a good place to be single, but doesn’t elaborate.  Andy asks Lala why she and Scheana aren’t tight anymore, and Lala feels the support wasn’t reciprocal. Scheana goes on a  tear about how many burdens she’s been carrying, and that Lala didn’t invite her on the private jet because she’s too much drama. There’s some back and forth with them that’s totally unimportant.

They joke about Scheana not saying much about Rob this season, and show five thousand clips of her talking about him. She says they dated before she met Shay, and she’d had a what if? question in her head over the years. She says she met him after she graduated college, and I’m stunned to find out she graduated college. It must be easier these days. Scheana goes down Rob Memory Lane until everyone is like, wrap it up. Andy asks why she wouldn’t entertain the notion of Rob kissing someone else. Was she in denial? Scheana says that’s the moment he pulled away. She says Shay always had her back, even when she treated him poorly. Rob shut off two weeks after they wrapped. She wondered if it was a calculated move, so she wouldn’t have the storyline of another breakup. Kristen says it’s manipulation at its finest. Scheana is surprised to find out Rob has been texting Jax.

Scheana gets all emotional, saying that she was head over heels for Rob, and loved him for twelve years. She could justify her divorce, but this left her brokenhearted. Lisa says he came into her life and on her show, knowing when it aired and that she’d be humiliated. It’s not fair. Kristen says he claimed to not want to do the show, but managed to be at every red-carpet event. Lala says she knows they have issues, but Scheana put her heart, soul, and effort into everything she did. Lala says the only time Rob was around was when Scheana wasn’t. It wasn’t just the behavior of someone who treats her wrong, but someone who doesn’t want to be with someone else. Andy says Rob saying he didn’t throw around I love you lightly, made it seem like he hadn’t said it. Scheana insists he had. I don’t believe it. I can just see her trying to be the cool girl, all the while lying to herself. Jax says he just repeated what Rob had said. Scheana says Jax told every Rob had said he didn’t think he was in love with her. This degenerates into Jax getting pissed all over again about Scheana trying to set Brittany up. Jax says that the guy Scheana supposed loved, wasn’t saying it back. Scheana swears he did. Andy tells Jax that Scheana claims he was threatened by Rob being taller, more successful, and better looking. Jax asks how that’s working for her, and she says eff you. He says she didn’t even call him when his father died. She says she texted him. He says she invited him to her Vegas show though.

Scheana says she’s never done this, and gets up, saying she needs a minute. Jax wails that two exes who hated him came, bringing back the Jax who I know and hate. Tom tells Jax to calm down. Ariana takes off her heels, and runs after Scheana. Jax is loud, but just keeps repeating himself. Ariana tells Scheana that he’s upset about his dad, and projecting. Scheana sniffles that she sent him a message about how sorry she was, as the makeup crew works on her. Jax continues to rage, and Kristen tries to get him to calm down. Scheana says she just saw him two weeks ago in Vegas, and he said he was having fun. He wanted to go to a hockey game instead of her show, and she was fine with it. He screeches about her getting angry with him for not showing up at a red-carpet event. Ariana tells Scheana that he’s still yelling. Jax says she can’t keep a boyfriend for more than ten minutes. Ariana tells Scheana to come back when she’s ready. Scheana wonders who he’s yelling at, since she’s not even there. Jax yells about sending flowers. Andy asks if Scheana is coming back, and Ariana explains that her lashes came off. Jax says he got more from people who didn’t know him. Ariana repeats what Scheana said about him being in Vegas, and he says she bugged him about the red-carpet thing, but said nothing about his dad. Tom reacts the way we all would, and drinks from a flask. Jax won’t shut up, and Scheana asks why is this like, harder than her divorce?

Next time, Stassi and Scheana get into it, Billie Lee joins the group, James and Lala argue, and the topic of Jax and Faith returns.

⬆ I was looking at the fashions from the Met gala, and wondered what the hell was on Nicki Minaj’s head. It was my cursor.

🐴 Thoughts on Sunday’s Westworld. Hey, there are no tigers in the Old West; yes, that was Simon, and he’s quite a shot now; and, those Native Americans are going to be bad news for the woman who washed up on the beach, unless the tiger washed up with her and they worship her as queen.

😈 The New Monica…