What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Jason puts a gun in the back of his waistband. He puts on his jacket, on goes out.

Sonny asks why Phyllis is working on the books at this time of night. Why doesn’t she do it in the morning? She says, it’s finally good news. Since Elijah was arrested, business has picked up. He asks where Lenny is, and she says she suggested Lenny turn in early, and for once, the stubborn old fool agreed to take care of himself. She thanks Mike/Sonny for talking some sense into her husband. If it wasn’t for Sonny, Lenny would still be hiding his condition from her. Sonny says Lenny didn’t want her to worry, and she says she’s glad Sonny is around. She hopes he doesn’t mind her thinking of him as family. He says he’s honored. He doesn’t have any family. They hug, and she says she doesn’t know what she’d do without him. She guesses she’ll have to figure it out.

Nina goes to Maxie’s place, and says, she’s so sorry. How awful. She hugs Maxie, and Maxie says, Nina being home is the first good news she’s had in a long time. Nina says she’ll do anything she can to help find the baby, but Maxie says, Anna and Mac are looking; so is Sam. Nina asks what she can do; name it. Maxie’s phone rings, and she says, it’s Sam; she should probably take it. Nina says, of course (🍷). She’ll check on James, and take some pictures. Maxie asks Sam, what’s up? and Sam says she’s at the country house the fake nurse brought Maxie to. Maxie says she didn’t have to go there. The Pawtuck police searched it. And isn’t it kind of late? Doesn’t Sam have kids to go home to? Sam says Kristina is watching the kids, and she’s prepared to spend the night. Sam isn’t going to rest until she finds out what happened.

Ned sits on the terrace, when Olivia comes out. She says, that’s where he wandered off to. She thought he left without saying goodbye. He asks if that would have bothered her, and she says, yeah. He says, good to know, and she sits with him. She wonders what the brand new grandpa is doing out there, and he says he was thinking about his own grandparents. They were always excited when a new baby was born into the family. He thinks they had something to do with Brook having a happy, healthy baby.

Valentin sees Brook with a drink, and says, bourbon? Is she all right? She says, no, and he asks, what happened? She says, Chase is terminal. He’s going to die.

Willow tells Michael that Chase asked her to marry him, and she said yes. He says, what? and she says, Chase is dying. He asks if she’s sure. He knows Chase had a bad reaction… She says he told her himself, and Finn confirmed it. They’re going to lose him. He hugs her.  

Sam looks around, and Dante comes in. He asks what the hell she’s doing there, and she says she has a better question. What took him so long? He says he knows it’s hard to believe, but he has other cases. Why is she there? She says she’s focusing on finding Louise for Maxie, and nothing else.

Ava sips a martini at the MetroCourt bar with Nikolas. She says, the bright side of their temporary stay at the MetroCourt is that they have access to the bar. No one makes a dirty martini like they do. Does he think it would be wise if they took Dante’s advice? He says, they agreed. There’s no way they’re breaking up.

Jason comes into the MetroCourt, and tells Carly, it’s good to be a free man. His phone rings, and she says, business? He says, yeah, and she asks if it’s anything she should know. Everything went through her when he was gone. He says he’s back, and she says she understands. Britt comes in smiles at Jason.

Carly tells Britt, welcome back, and Jason asks, how’s the hospital? Britt says, everyone is in a party mood. Cyrus was under guard, and going to Federal prison. Carly thanks her for saving Jason, and Britt says, it was only fair. He’d just saved her from Cyrus. Carly says, Cyrus won’t hurt anyone anymore, so Britt can sit back, relax, and focus on running the hospital without putting her life on the line. Jason asks if he can have a word with Britt, and they sit at a table together.

Ava says, Dante more than implied that Nikolas would be safer without her, but he says he doesn’t want a life without her. Being together is worth any risk. The bartender asks if they’d like another round, and Nikolas says, at the table. They leave the bar, and the bartender watches them. Ava has stupidly left her bag on the bar, and the bartender looks inside.

Dante says he doesn’t want to ask how Sam got in, and she says, that isn’t the point. The point is to find Louise. He says he went through the PCPD file, and it was thorough. She asks what he’s doing thee then, and he says he wanted to check it out, maybe meet the owner if they show up. She asks if he thinks the owner has something to do with Peter, but he doesn’t know. He’s going to ask that question. Austin walks in like he owns the place. Because he does.

Ned tells Olivia that he was planning on staying until Michael got there, but it’s getting late. He’ll come back in the morning, and catch Michael at breakfast. She says, don’t be silly. It’s going to rain. He can stay there.

Brook tells Valentin that Finn’s been working in the lab, but can’t find a cure. Finn doesn’t know how to react, so he’s just covering for the fact Chase is going to die. Valentin says, another life destroyed by Peter, and she says Peter knows better than to show his face there. He’d better stay far away from Maxie. But if he’s not found, Maxie will always be looking over her shoulder. It’s a horrible feeling, and Peter has cost Maxie so much already. She suddenly panics, and asks, where’s Bailey? He says she must be tired. He fed Bailey 40 minutes ago, and she’s sleeping. She says he’s good at the parenting thing, and he says it’s not his first child. She tells him, if she hasn’t said it before, she’s grateful for his help. He says she doesn’t have to keep thanking him. Bailey is his baby too.

Nina asks Maxie if there was any news, but Maxie says, no leads. Nina says, what about Peter? Are they safe? Maxie says she doesn’t know. Peter hasn’t been seen since she confronted him at the hospital. Nina says she’s hiring a security detail for Maxie, and Maxie says she loves Nina, and knows she’s trying to help, but she can’t talk about Peter or that psycho nurse anymore. She’s trying to be present for Georgie and James. If she thinks about it, it won’t help. Nina says she took some adorable pictures of James, and gives Maxie her phone. Maxie says she has to ask. What’s so attractive about Nixon Falls, Pennsylvania? When Nina left, saying she needed a break, Maxie thought she’d be gone for a few weeks. She’s been gone for months. What’s in Nixon Falls that caused her to stay away for so long?   

Sonny asks what Phyllis means by how will they get along without him when he’s gone? What makes her think he’s leaving? She says, one word; Nina. If Nina decides to stay in Port Charles, how long before he goes after her?  

Willow tells Michael, Jackie and Gregory are devastated, and Finn seems broken over the fact he hasn’t found a cure. Time is running out. All Chase wants is to be her husband for however long he has left. He deserves that, doesn’t he? Michael says, even if it’s a lie? Willow looks at him.

Britt thanks Jason for sending her mom to Canada, and says, it was very sweet. He says he didn’t want her to be alone, He hadn’t wanted to leave her with what she was going through. She says she keeps thinking about how Maxie is suffering, and it puts things in perspective. Right now, today, she’s fine; she’s great. She laughs, and says she just has to remind herself to stay in the moment. He asks how that’s working, and she says she knows she had a moment of weakness in the lighthouse, but it’s over now. What happened in Canada is in the past. Time to move on, right?

Ava tells Nikolas that she still thinks Ryan is behind everything, but supposes Dante could be right. Maybe it’s not Ryan. Maybe it’s one of Nikolas’s exes. The bartender comes over to the table with Ava’s bag, saying she left it at the bar, and she thanks him. Nikolas tells Ava that he doubts it. Elizabeth isn’t the stalking type. Ava says, interesting how his mind went straight to Elizabeth, and he says she’s his only ex in Port Charles. Ava says, no, she isn’t. There’s another one sitting over there. She looks at Britt.  

Olivia and Ned go inside, and Brook tells them that Valentin is checking on Bailey. Ned says Brook looks so sad. She’d mentioned she was going to the hospital to visit Chase. She says, it’s not going well, and he says he’s so sorry. He knows she and Chase are close. He hugs Brook, and Olivia says what Brook needs is a good night’s sleep. She just had a baby. Brook says, right, but Ned says, before she goes to bed, he has something to tell everyone. 

Phyllis tells Sonny that he and Nina had a connection, but he says he doesn’t think it was any more than that. She says, don’t let time and distance ruin it. She knows she misses Nina already, and can imagine how he feels. Did Nina get there okay? Has she seen her grandson? He doesn’t say anything, and Phyllis asks if he’s telling her that he hasn’t even called. Not even a text? He says he doesn’t want to be pushy, but she says she bets Nina would be thrilled to know he was thinking about her.

Nina tells Maxie, it’s not some big mystery. Nixon Falls is a cute little town, surrounded by countryside. It’s beautiful, and it felt comfortable, so she didn’t feel the need to travel further. Maxie says Nina grew up in Manhattan. She’s a city girl. What do they do that’s exciting there? Cow tipping? Nina says, it’s more than just farms, and she promises there are no cows on Phyllis’s street. Maxie says, that’s right. Phyllis is an old friend of Nina’s. It must be nice be somewhere new, and still know people. Nina’s phone rings, and Maxie asks, who’s Mike?

Austin tells Dante and Sam, he hopes it’s okay with them, but he owns this place. Dante introduces himself, and Austin asks if Sam is his partner, but Dante says, no. She’s a P.I. and a family friend. Sam asks his name, and he tells her. She asks if he’s the doctor who delivered Maxie’s baby, and he says that would be him. Sam says, and he happens to own the house where Maxie was held. Quite a coincidence. Austin says, not so much. He owns several properties in the area, and it’s been in the family forever. Do they think he had something to do with Maxie’s kidnapping? Sam says, no, but Dante says it’s an excellent point. Maxie was held there, and he delivered her baby; what are the odds? Austin says, big city slickers with big city suspicions. He hired management to take care of the property. He had no idea anyone was there. Dante says, they might have big city suspicions, but his name keeps popping up.

Jason says, he and Britt aren’t fugitives anymore. Things changed between them at the lighthouse. It wasn’t a one-off; at least not for him. She says, her neither. Thanks, Stone Cold. He says, Spinelli calls him that, but he’s trying to break Spinelli of the habit. Nikolas comes to their table and asks to talk to Britt, but Jason tells him that he’s interrupting.

Michael tells Willow, marriage is a big deal, and shouldn’t be based on a lie. He knows he sounds hypocritical (yes, he does), since they got married to improve their chances for custody of Wiley… Willow says, he told her it was wrong for the right reasons, and he says, now they’re stuck in this mess. It’s like they say; the road to hell is paved with good intentions. She asks if he’s saying he regrets falling in love with her.

Jason says, when Carly was trying to get Spinelli back, Nikolas almost blew the deal, but Nikolas says he’s not apologizing for protecting his wife. Besides, Cyrus was going to prison, and they all had a hand in it. Jason says, if Nikolas hadn’t been stupid and gotten caught, they might have gotten Cyrus sooner. The outcome had nothing to do with him. He tells Nikolas to stay out of his business, and Nikolas asks if he doesn’t mean Carly’s business.   

Nina says she’ll let it go to voicemail, and Maxie asks if she’s avoiding Mike no-last-name. Nina says, no, but she’s there to see Maxie, and doesn’t want to be rude. Maxie says she’s family; Nina can take the call in front of her. Unless she’s hiding something. Nina says she’s not. She and Mike talked before she left, and she’s sure it can wait. Maxie asks what Nina means by talk. Was it a special goodbye? Nina says, Mike is a bartender at the Tan-O, and a friend of Phyllis, who owns it. She met Mike when she first arrived. She thought she took the trip to do some healing, and never dreamed she’d connect with someone in this way. Maxie says, enough dodging. Tell her everything. James cries, and Maxie adds, after she checks on James. Call Mike back. Nina says Maxie is silly, and laughs. She checks to see that Maxie is gone, and grabs her phone. She calls Mike/Sonny back, and he says he’s glad she called back. Did he interrupt her visit? She says, no. She’s happy he called. He asks if she saw her grandson, and she says, earlier this evening. It was wonderful. He says he’s glad to hear that, but she sounds stressed. Is it tough to be back? She says, it’s harder than she thought it would be.

Dante tells Austin to remind him again how he happened on Maxie in the woods when she went into labor. Austin says he lives near there, and hikes in the woods every day. Sam says, at the exact same spot Maxie was at? and he asks if she doesn’t want to pretend to be the good cop. Dante says, Sam’s not a cop, but good question, and Austin didn’t answer. Austin says hiking centers him. He usually goes in the early afternoon, but he was helping a guy out. Dante says he had a busy day for a country doctor. He could have skipped the hike. Austin says he told them, he hikes every day. This is why he chose not to live in the city. With a high density population, he’s likely to run into a level of skepticism. If they’re Maxie’s friends, they should be celebrating that she ran into him, and happy that he’s a doctor. He doesn’t mean to boast, but he’s kind of the good guy in this story. Dante asks if that’s why there’s a hidden camera in the living room.   

Ned tells Brook that he’s called an emergency meeting of the ELQ Board. Now that she has her shares back, they can bounce Valentin as CEO. Valentin has come in, and asks if they’ve figured out who’s replacing him. Ned or Michael?

Michael says, falling in love with Willow is the best thing that could have happened to him. Never question that. She just surprised him, that’s all. She says she was surprised too. What does he think she should do? He says, what he wants her to do is the exact opposite of what she should do. He has to keep reminding himself that it’s not about them. It’s about what Chase needs. Willow says, Chase’s dying wish was to marry her. How can she possibly say no to that? He says, she can’t.

Valentin says he reckoned they would be holding a vote to replace him, and Ned says, the negotiation happened weeks ago. Valentin must have realized then that once they were in control, he’d be shown the door. Valentin says, it’s an emotional decision. A good CEO uses his head, not his feelings. ELQ thrived on his watch. Brook suggests they save it for the meeting, but Ned says ELQ was strong before Valentin’s coup. Valentin says, Michael was capable, but had to step down. Olivia says, enough.

Austin asks what camera Dante is talking about, and Dante points it out. Austin waves to the camera, and says he can only assume management put it there. He’s never seen it  before. Dust it for fingerprints; they won’t find his.  Dante’s phone rings, and Austin says he has nothing to do with Maxie’s kidnapping. The first time he saw her was when she was having a baby. Dante said he sent the footage to the station, and he’s waiting to hear back.

Jason asks if Nikolas is done. He still needs to talk to Britt alone. Nikolas says, her call, and she ask if she and Jason can’t finish their conversation later. Jason steps away, and Britt says she can’t imagine what she and Nikolas have to talk about. Is Spencer okay? He says, Spencer is fine. However, he heard her and Jason hid out on a Cassadine property; the game preserve. She asks if he’s hitting her up for rent, and he says he doesn’t care about the money. He’s surprised she still remembered the place. It’s been so long since they were a couple. Britt says, and…? and Nikolas asks what kind of game she’s playing. He and Ava have been receiving threatening packages.

Nina tells Sonny that she is stressed. She’s with her sister-in-law who just suffered a terrible tragedy. She’s giving her comfort, but it’s hard to see how devastated she is. He asks if there’s anything he can do, and she says, no, but thanks. He says, that’s a dumb question. How is he going to help someone he doesn’t know? She says, it’s not dumb; it’s who he is. He sees someone hurting, and tries to help. He helped her. He says she helped him too. He should be with her. She says, it’s nice to hear his voice. He tells her, call anytime, and she says, goodnight. Maxie says she knows that smile. Mike isn’t just some bartender. Nina likes him.  

Ava tells Jason, if he’s through with the tough guy routine, she’d like her husband back. Jason says Nikolas approached him, and Ava says she’s curious as to how this is going to work with Carly. Carly asks what she’s talking about, and Ava says she’s not in the business anymore, but she still hears things. Carly leaped into Sonny’s shoes when Jason was unavailable. Jason is back now. Is she planning on handing him the keys to the kingdom? Carly says that’s none of Ava’s business. Keep her posted on Avery. She walks away.

Britt says she had no idea Nikolas was being threatened, and he says they’ve been getting packages with creepy personal messages. The police suggested it might be the work of one of his exes. It’s not like Britt hasn’t played dirty in the past. She says, in the past. Period. How does he know Ava isn’t staging it herself? Britt doesn’t know his life, and doesn’t want to. Leave her alone.

Nina says, what smile? She can’t smile because she loves her sister-in-law?… Okay. She does feel something for Mike. She didn’t know leaving would be hard, and now she’s there to spend time with Wiley, and it’s great. Maxie says she was hoping Michael would change his mind. Wiley is Nina’s grandchild. Nina says, apparently, Jax had something to do with it, and Maxie wonders if Jax is trying to win Nina back. Nina says, according to Jax, he wanted to make up for the pain he caused. Maxie asks if Nina thinks she and Jax will get back together, but Nina says, no. Maxie says, because of Mike no-last-name? and Nina says, no. Because she was healing, she hadn’t realized how long she’d been away until she came back. So much has changed. Valentin is living at the Quartermaines, and had a baby with Brook. She was not expecting that. Maxie asks if she saw Brook’s baby, and Nina says she did. It’s probably the last thing Maxie wants to talk about. Maxie says she and Brook ended up taking Lamaze classes together, and bonded. If she can’t talk about her own baby. she wants to talk about Brook’s. How is the baby doing? Is she taking formula? She wants to know everything.

Ned says he knows what Valentin is doing. He wants to pit them against one another. Valentin says he predicts a split vote that will leave him in charge. He leaves to check on Bailey, and Olivia says, Valentin is so infuriating. He can be an amoral sharks one minute, and the next, he’s a dream dad. She can’t wait for him to change poopy diapers. Ned says Valentin has a point about splitting the vote, but they can discuss it in the morning. Olivia says she thinks they don’t want to discuss it in front of her; she’s had that issue before. She knows Ned wants to be CEO. Ned says, it’s important they present a united front, but he’s okay with Michael being CEO. He wants the best for ELQ, but he could be happy with a lesser position. He’s realized there are more important things than work.   

Michael asks if Willow thinks she’ll keep sleeping at the gatehouse, but she doesn’t know. She wants to spend as much time with Chase as she can. She’ll still make time for Wiley, but… He tells her to just say it, and she says when she spends time with Wiley, Michael can’t be around. It will just make it too hard. She asks him to please tell her that he understands, and he says, his head understands; his heart, not so much. If that makes it easy, he’ll do it. She says, nothing about it is easy. She cries, and they kiss. He heads for the door, and she says she loves him. He says he loves her too, and leaves. She sits down and cries.  

Phyllis asks if Nina is happy, and Sonny says she is, but Phyllis was right to think Nina needed to talk. She asks, why? Was there a problem with the visit to her grandson? He says, that went well, but Nina’s sister-in-law is going through some trouble, and Nina is worried about it. Phyllis says, Port Charles is not that far, so say the word, and he can take her car and surprise Nina. (Nina wouldn’t be the only one who’d be surprised.)

Dante says they didn’t see Austin on the video, and Austin says he told Dante he wasn’t there that night. Maxie sure is a strong woman. Sam agrees that she is, and Dante thanks Austin for his help. He’ll walk Austin to the door. Austin says, this is when they talk about him, and Dante says, pretty much. He’ll be in touch. Austin leaves, and Sam says she doesn’t know what to think. Dante says, Maxie lied to them.

Nina says she’s a little worried that Maxie is fixated on Valentin and Brook’s baby, but Maxie says she’s not fixated. She’s just interested. She and Brook aren’t friends, but they bonded. So is the baby doing okay? Nina says, the baby is perfect, and loved. Maxie says, good to know. Brook’s birth was an ordeal. Nina asks how she knows, and Maxie says she was thinking of Louise. Nina asks if Maxie is okay. Does she want Nina to call someone, like Mac or Felicia? Maxie says she’s just exhausted emotionally; she’s all over the place. Nina says she’ll leave and let Maxie take a nap, but remember, she’s only a phone call away if Maxie needs her. She tells Maxie that she loves her, and Maxie says she loves Nina too. Nina leaves, and Maxie says, she can’t do this. She needs to see her baby.

Austin sees an announcement about the ELQ emergency board meeting in his tablet newsfeed. Hmm…

Michael comes in, and Brook asks if he’s okay. He says, it’s been a long day, and Ned says he’s afraid it’s going to get longer. They need to discuss the CEO position at ELQ before the meeting. Valentin is planning to divide and conquer. He thinks the vote will be split, leaving him in charge, and he realizes it’s a possibility. Michael looks out the window.

Willow sits in the dark, looking out the window.  

As they get in the elevator, Nikolas tells Ava, they could get room service, but she says she lost her appetite. He says he’s sure he can find something to tempt her, and kisses her.

On the phone, the bartender says he got the key to Nikolas’s room. They’re all set.

Jason asks what Nikolas wanted, and Britt says, he had a bunch of ridiculous, unfounded accusations. She’s not letting it get to her. Jason holds her hand, and says, she is. She says that’s what she wants the world to think, but maybe it’s okay if he knows the truth.

Carly walks in and sees Jason and Britt together. She does not look happy.

Tomorrow, Laura asks how Portia and Curtis are doing, Britt wants to apologize to Elizabeth, and Cyrus says it’s about time someone showed up. Well, we know it’s not Peter. I think…

The Haves and The Have Nots

Jeffrey sees Madison at the hospital, and Madison asks how his visit was. Jeffrey stammers, and Madison asks, what’s wrong? Talk to him. Jeffrey doesn’t know how Madison is going to take it, and Madison says he doesn’t know either until Jeffrey tells him. Jeffrey says, Justin’s brother spoke to him when they were going to the morgue. Madison tells Jeffrey not to let it upset him, and Jeffrey says Tanner told him that Justin was HIV positive. Madison asks how Tanner would know, and Jeffrey says Tanner knew about him, and was kind to him; not like his mother. He wanted to give Jeffrey something Justin left. Madison asks if Jeffrey thinks it’s true, but Jeffrey doesn’t know. Madison asks if Justin ever told Jeffrey that he was HIV positive, and Jeffrey says, no. Madison asks if they talked about safe sex and STDs, and Jeffrey says they didn’t. Madison asks if they used condoms, and Jeffrey says, not 100% of the time. Madison asks what Jeffrey thought would happen. Justin was having sex with random guys in his cop car.

Madison tells Jeffrey that he has to protect himself, but Jeffrey says he doesn’t need a lecture. Madison asks if Jeffrey is worried he gave HIV to him; they used condoms. Jeffrey says, they’re not 100% effective, but Madison says, coupled with the meds he takes, he probably wouldn’t get it. Jeffrey asks, what meds? and Madison says, the drugs keep him from getting HIV. Jeffrey didn’t know about this? (TBH, me neither.) He’ll get Jeffrey some research. It won’t cure HIV, but will prevent someone from getting it if they don’t have it. Jeffrey says, what if he does have it? and Madison says he’ll get Jeffrey tested. Stop stressing. Jeffrey says he knew Justin, and Justin would give it to him on purpose. Madison says, even if Jeffrey has it, it’s not a death sentence like it was years ago. Tons of people who have it lead normal, happy, healthy lives. If Jeffrey has it, he’ll take meds, and live a normal life. He won’t die. He can get the test done in 20 minutes. Jeffrey says Madison doesn’t seem to be worked up, and Madison says he has the information and the power. They go into an exam room.   

Benny puts a key in a hotel room door, and Candace asks why they’re here. He says they need someplace to stay, and she says, it’s a dump. He says, just because you’ve got money, don’t mean you have to spend it all. She says, $400 a night is not a lot, and he says, $600 for a weekend’s not bad. They go into the room, and Candace says, what if someone steals Benny’s two trucks? He says he wishes they would. This place isn’t bad for the time being. She tells him, if he says so. She hated living in the ghetto then, and she hates it now. It brings back bad memories. He says, it wasn’t that bad… Sorry. She says her son was killed in a place like this, and he says, they can go. She says, no. At some point, she has to sit with it. One night; then she’ll be gone. She asks what he’s wearing on his date, and he says what he has on. She says, this is a classy woman. He needs to wear a suit. He says he doesn’t have one, and she tells him, get one. He says she likes spending money. What does she want? He’s a tow truck driver. She says he doesn’t have to look like one. She’ll hook him up. He says he just wants to smash Rianna, and Candace says, if all he wants to do is smash, he won’t find a good girl, but one day, one of them will take his heart. He says she sounds like mama, and Candace says, she’s right. He says he’ll cross that bridge when he comes to it, and she says she’d like to see him with someone special. He says he’s not ready, and she says, one day, it will happen. He tells her, if she says so, and there’s a knock at the door. Mitch comes in, and says, zup? He asks what the hell they’re doing here, and Candace says he sounds like her. Benny says he ain’t spending money, and Mitch says, obviously. Mitch thought Candace would be gone by now, and she says, long story. He asks if she’s good, and she says she is. He asks if they want to get dinner, and she says, Benny has a date. Mitch laughs, and Benny says he bought a house. Candace says, it came with a date, and Benny says he spun his game with the realtor. He put a few words together, and now he’s going out. Candace says, take her anywhere but here, and tells Benny to go buy something nice to wear. Mitch asks if Benny has looked at himself tonight, and Candace tells Benny to go now, since it will have to be tailored. Benny says if it’s over $100, he’s out. Candace says, it’s just one, and Benny tells them, make sure they come back. He leaves, and Candace asks Mitch to unzip her. He says it reminds him of old times, and she says, don’t. He tells her, he’s just saying.  

Benny tries on a suit, and the clerk asks what he thinks. Benny says, it’s nice; how much? She says, $1800, and he says, for what? She says, the stitching and fabric. It’s made with the finest material, and the designer is exquisite. She asks what the suit is for, and he says he’s going on a date. The clerk says, she must be someone special, and he says he just met her. She says he must want impress her, but he says, it’s not the suit that will impress her, and the clerk says he’ll be even more handsome in the suit. He asks what kind of suit it is, and she says, Italian. He says he’s sure she has something cheaper, and she says she does, but why settle for cheap? He says he’ll settle for nice, and she says, there’s nothing nicer than Italian. She can give him a discount. How’s 30% off? Benny tries to do the math, and she says, it will be $1200. He says, it should come with cufflinks, sex, and a turkey sandwich. Now he sounds like me. She says she’s sure if he’s wearing it, he’ll get that, and he says, if he doesn’t, can he bring it back? She says they can’t give a refund if it’s tailored, and he says if he doesn’t get it tailored, can he bring it back? She says, that’s not store policy. There’s no guarantee he’ll get lucky. He says she’ll owe him something if he doesn’t get lucky, and she says she’s not a hooker. He says he didn’t mean to insult her, but she says, it’s very insulting. Just because he’s buying a suit, doesn’t mean he gets to take her out. He says, how about dinner? and she asks if he isn’t going out already. He’s just… a flirt. She gives him her number.

Madison tells Jeffrey that he’s negative, and Jeffrey is obviously relieved. Madison says, good thing; the meds are expensive. Jeffrey wonders why Tanner would lie. Maybe Justin didn’t have it. He asks if Madison could find out, but Madison says he’s not taking that risk. He could lose his job. Jeffrey says he just wants to know if Tanner lied, and Madison looks up something on the computer. Jeffrey asks what he’s looking at, and Madison says, Justin’s medical records, and the list of meds he was on. He can’t give that information out; it’s confidential. Jeffrey says, then why is he looking? and Madison says, peace of mind. Ask him if Justin lied. Jeffrey says, did he lie? and Madison says, no. Jeffrey asks what he means, and Madison says, it means he didn’t lie. Think about it. If Justin never told Jeffrey that he had HIV, he didn’t lie. Jeffrey says, this is confusing. Did Justin have it or not? Madison shakes his head, and Jeffrey says, thanks. Madison asks if Jeffrey wants to talk about safe sex and the drugs that prevent HIV now, and Jeffrey says he knows what his dad taught him. Madison asks how long ago that was, but Jeffrey doesn’t know. He wonders how Justin’s brother could lie, and Madison says maybe he wanted to give Jeffrey anxiety. Jeffrey says Tanner wanted to give him something Justin left, but Madison says, don’t deal with him. He could be as crazy as his brother. Don’t think about it, and don’t see him. Jeffrey says he gave Tanner his address, and Madison asks if here’s still security at the house. The giant dude who walks around. Jeffrey says security is covered, and Madison says he took the night off – family emergency. He wants to be with Jeffrey. Jeffrey says he’s fine, and Madison says, then they can watch movies and be fine together.

Benny looks at himself in the mirror, and takes a selfie. He sends it, then calls Mitch, telling him to check his phone. Mitch says, damn, dude, and Benny says he got it. Mitch asks what it set Benny back, and Benny says, $1200. They’d better bury him in it. Mitch laughs, and says, it looks good on him. Benny says, he used to get 2 for 1 at $29.99. He asks what Mitch is doing, and Mitch says, waiting for Candace to get out of the bathroom. Benny says, he’ll be waiting a while, and Mitch says, have fun. Hit him up when he’s done. Benny looks at another suit, holding it up to himself. He tells the clerk, the brown one is $600. She says she wants him to look his best, and he says she’s juicing it up. How much is her commission? She says she’s not telling him, and stop flirting with his thirsty ass. He asks what she knows about thirsty, and she tells him to come to the register. He asks if they take cash.

Mitch waits, and Candace pokes her head out, asking if it was Benny. Mitch says, Benny got that suit. He’s crazy. He was bitching about dropping $1200. She says she’d like to see it, and he says she can as soon as she’s out of the  see as soon as out bathroom. She says she’ll be done soon, and he asks what’s taking so long. He’s getting hungry. She comes out, and Mitch is lying on the bed in his briefs. She tells him to put his clothes on. What got into him? He says, seeing her looking like that. What’s he supposed to do? She says she’s sure Benny will be back any minute, but Mitch says Benny isn’t coming back. She can’t blame him for trying. She says she’s flattered, but she’s hungry… for food. He says he thinks she’s beautiful, but she says, those days are gone. He says he knows, but he loves her. She says she loves him too, but they can’t be together. He says he wants to talk to her, and she sits on the other bed. He says he’s been worried about her. Everything with her son, the President; she was hurt by that. Jim knows his family won’t be happy if something happens to her, but the truth is, the Cryers are in deep with his family, and his grandma. If they happen to talk with her, he can’t promise it will hold up. Candace says, so Jim could come after Benny, and Mitch says, he could, but his grandma would have to okay it first. She says, let her know, and he says, she and Benny will be the first to know. He puts on his pants.

Tanner calls Jeffrey, and says he’s not doing well. He was going to try and bring some things by. Would Jeffrey mind meeting him? Madison is still sleeping, and Jeffrey asks what he has. Tanner says he doesn’t know. It says personal on it. Jeffrey doesn’t know, and Tanner says, it was Justin’s last dying wish. Jeffrey asks again what it is, but Tanner says, he feels like he’s invading Justin’s privacy. Jeffrey says Tanner has his permission, and Tanner says he’d rather bring them to Jeffrey. Jeffrey says, in all honesty, he probably won’t take it. Tanner says his brother died, and Jeffrey won’t take what Justin left him? Jeffrey says, unless Tanner tells him what it is, sorry. Tanner asks if Jeffrey is coming to the service, but Jeffrey says he doesn’t think Justin’s mother would want that. Tanner says, Justin would, and Jeffrey says, when is it? Tanner says, tomorrow, and Jeffrey says, so soon? Tanner asks if he can text the address, and Jeffrey says, sure. Tanner says he’ll bring the stuff with him, and thanks Jeffrey for being good to his brother. He hangs up, and Jeffrey puzzles over this. He puts his phone on the nightstand, and Madison wakes up. He says, can he ask? What the hell was that about? Jeffrey says, it was Justin’s brother. He said he wanted to give Jeffrey something Justin had left him. Madison says, tell him to drop it off, and Jeffrey says, Tanner wants to give it to him in person. Madison says he doesn’t like the sound of it, and Jeffrey says he told Tanner that he won’t take it. He said the memorial service is tomorrow night. Madison says, Justin just died yesterday. That’s not good. Jeffrey says he knows, and Madison says he doesn’t like the sound of it at all. Please don’t deal with these people. Jeffrey says he feels it, but he’s curious. Madison says, Tanner was lying about his brother’s status; he’s gaslighting Jeffrey. Jeffrey asks if Madison is lecturing him, and Madison says he is; sorry. Jeffrey’s dad said he talked too much. He says he’s going home, but Jeffrey says, no. He wants Madison to stay. Madison’s phone rings, and he says, dammit. Work. He answers, and says he took the night off… Okay. He’s on his way. He tells Jeffrey that he has to go in. Keisha is sick. She’s lying her ass off. The last time she posted pictures of herself drinking. Who tries to hide something and then posts about it? He says, Jeffrey wouldn’t be missing him so much if he had a job. Jeffrey asks who said he misses Madison? and Madison says, the hospital is hiring. He wishes his parents were rich and took care of him.

The nurse on duty thanks Madison for coming in. She knows it was his day off, but they’re so short staffed. He’s such a blessing. She gives him the charts, and says, watch out for that one. He says, Wyatt Cryer? and she says, yeah.

Madison goes into Wyatt’s room, and Wyatt says he needs pain pills. Madison says, sorry, he can’t, and Wyatt says, why the hell not? Madison says, looks like he had them an hour ago, and Wyatt asks, what the hell kind of hospital is this? Madison says, one that’s trying to make him better, and Wyatt says he’s in pain. Madison says, sorry. He had his daily dose. Wyatt says he has a high tolerance, and needs more. At least remove the restraints. Madison says he can’t, but Wyatt says he has to go to the bathroom. Madison says, there’s a bedpan there, and Wyatt asks how he’s supposed to reach it wearing the restraints. Madison says, Wyatt has a free hand, and Wyatt says he noticed how good looking Madison is when he came in. Does Madison think he’s good looking? Madison asks if that’s all, and Wyatt asks Madison to hand him a cup. Madison does, and Wyatt strokes his arm. He says, help him out. Doesn’t Madison think he’s good looking? Madison says, if Wyatt thinks he’s giving him extra drugs because Wyatt is flirting with him, he’s dead wrong. Wyatt says Madison is an a-hole, and Madison says Wyatt is locked up. He leaves, and Wyatt says, Madison can’t resist him. None of them can. He’s Wyatt Cryer, bitches. Bring him the damn drugs.  

Madison goes back to the desk, and the nurse says she told him. Did Wyatt flirt with him? Madison says, yeah. What about her? She says, yes. She almost took him up on it. A few pain pills for a roll in the hay. At her age, she’ll take what she can get. Madison says, he’s at the age where he can get what he can. She asks how much he’s getting, and he says he doesn’t want to make her upset, but she says she’s been hot bothered on the job. Madison says she’s in rare form, and she asks if he knows Dr. Washington. He asks, why? and she says she might be getting something there. He asks how she knows the doctor isn’t on his team, and she says she’s sure. He says, good to know.

Benny meets Rianna at a restaurant, and asks how she is. She say she’s impressed. He cleans up nice. She asks if he’s ready to sign the papers, and he asks if she wants a drink. She says she has water, and he says, come on; get a real drink. She says, it’s not a date, but he says he’s a nice guy. She says she’s not interested, and he says, why? He ain’t that ugly. She says, something about him says bad news, and he says he’s a hard worker, overly good looking… She says, with a lot of girls and kids, and he says he ain’t got no kids. She says, girls? and he says he ain’t seeing anybody. She asks if his girlfriend knows, and he tells her, stop. She gives him the papers, and shows him where to sign. She says he can move in right away, and he asks if she’s going to help him decorate. She suggests they get out of there, go back to her place, and have sex. He chokes on his water, and she says, that’s what he wants, right? He says, no. He’d never sleep with someone he just met. If she wants to get out and cuddle, he’ll do that, but he won’t let her take advantage of his body. She says he’s so lame. She thinks he’s handsome, but she just got out of a toxic relationship. They can talk from time to time, but she’s not sleeping with him, or dating him. He says he’s not sleeping with her, and doesn’t want to date her either, and she says, he’s so cocky. He says, sometimes. The waitress comes over to take their order, and Rianna orders a house salad. Benny orders the filet, and says, nice place. Rianna laughs.   

Later… Rianna thanks Benny for a great dinner, and he says, she’s serious. That’s it? Let him buy her a drink, or go dancing. She says she has to work in the morning, but he says, what is it? They’re having a good time, good conversation, and he knows she feels him a little. She says he knows nothing (Jon Snow). She told him that she just got out of a toxic re… Sandy is suddenly there, and sits on the chair between them. He asks if she’s talking about him, and she says she is. He says, go ahead. Tell the Black what she was saying. Benny says, hey, he’s on a date here. Rianna says, they’re not on a date, and Sandy says, no? He said it, right? They’re on a date. Benny says they were handling business, and Sandy says, what kind? Benny asks, what’s wrong with him? They just met, but he knows Sandy is a Malone. He knows Mitch. Sandy says he doesn’t give a damn. Why is she with him? Rianna says she sold him a house, and tries get up, but he pushes her back in the seat. He says she’s not going anywhere, and Benny says, let this go. Sandy asks, who the hell is Benny to tell him to let something go? She killed his child, his little boy, so shut his mouth, and walk away from the table. He wants to talk to this bitch. Benny says he doesn’t think… and Sandy says, is he crazy? He’s not moving. Benny says, it doesn’t look like Rianna wants to talk to him. Sandy asks who Benny is. A Black Panther? Does he think he’s going to save her. Get his ass out of there. Rianna says, just go; it’s okay. Sandy says, yeah, Benny. It’s okay. She says, it will only get worse, but Benny says, no, and gets up. Sandy says, okay, and gets up too, breaking a bottle against the table.  

Next time, Benny and Sandy fight, Mitch says he’s coming over there, Tanner asks Jeffrey what Justin liked, and Jim asks if Veronica knows how close to death she is. She tells him, just as close as he is.    

The Real Housewives of New York City

We backtracked a little, with Leah freaking out, throwing her flowers at Heather, and stomping out of the limo, saying she’s not going. Then calling Heather a loser and a psycho. Heather got out of the car, and Leah told LuAnn that she was overwhelmed. LuAnn said, but she looked great, which is exactly what I’d want to hear in that moment. Heather said Leah couldn’t scare her away, and Leah decided, like Bill Murray in Meatballs, it just didn’t matter. It just doesn’t matter is actually my motto. LuAnn said Leah couldn’t let her neck wound go to waste. (If you don’t remember, Leah had on a pink gown and tiara, accessorized with a faux sliced throat. LuAnn tidied up the limo, and in her interview, she said, Heather was in the wrong place at the wrong time. It wasn’t about Heather; it was about Leah. Her advice to Heather was STFU. They all managed to get into the limo in one piece, and Heather swore she didn’t use the word irresponsible in regard to Leah not voting. To her credit, Eboni owned her mistake, and in her interview, said, her bad. Sorry. Leah said the last thing she wanted to talk about was serious stuff like politics. Where she was at, that wasn’t a priority. Leah apologized for losing it. The arrived at Topping Rose, and LuAnn told everyone to put their beauty faces on. They were greeted by LuAnn’s friend Hank, who hoped they were ready to party. LuAnn’s daughter Victoria and niece Nicole were also in attendance. LuAnn said it wasn’t going to be like how they usually celebrated Halloween. It would just be their group, but they were going to make it fabulous.

The theme was Miss New York 1970, and the women each received sashes. Ramona was Miss South Hampton; Sonja, Miss Upper East Side; LuAnn, Miss Sag Harbor; Eboni, Miss City Hall; Heather, Miss Upper West Side; and Leah, Miss Downtown. They each did their special talent, LuAnn starting off with baton twirling. Oddly enough, I know how to do this, having taken lessons as a kid. However, I’m not saying I do it well. Ramona said she was going to show why her arms were good, lifted free weights, and did 40 push-ups. In Leah’s interview, she said she had no idea how Ramona did it. She could barely do 8 of them. Ramona consists of rosé and muscle. Leah did a routine with the hula hoops, and Heather did a cheer using pom-poms. Eboni did a beautiful spoken word piece, and in Ramona’s interview, she wondered why they couldn’t have fun for just one night. Sonja came out as a mime, and made them play charades. Eboni won second runner-up, and LuAnn won first runner-up. In LuAnn’s interview, she said, it’s so rigged. Leah was the big winner, and in her interview, she said she felt special. Hank didn’t know about her grandmother or her freak-out. She’d won fair and square. In her interview, LuAnn said she rigged it because she thought Leah needed it. Leah apologized for her reactions, and thanked her friends for helping her through it.

The next morning, Leah was already gone, having left for her grandmother’s bedside right after the pageant. In Ramona’s interview, she said she had a better understanding of Leah. Leah’s lashing out was always indicative of something bothering her inside. In the kitchen with LuAnn, Ramona started reading a group text from Leah, thanking them for being understanding, when she stopped and threw down the phone. She told LuAnn that Leah’s grandmother had died, and Leah never got to see her. LuAnn and Ramona cried, and Ramona tried to compose a reply, but gave up, saying she’d do it later. In LuAnn’s interview, she said this is why she didn’t have Ramona listed as an emergency contact. There was no emergency Ramona could make better. Eboni said she’d FaceTimed with Leah, and told her that God didn’t make mistakes. He wanted Leah’s last memory of her grandmother to be pleasant. Eboni told the women that there was someone named Ashley proclaiming to be her father’s daughter. In Eboni’s interview, she said here’s where it got sticky. Her mother had spoken about a man named Kenneth, who could potentially be her dad, but there was no concrete answer, and Eboni’s mother wasn’t comfortable exploring it. She’d asked Ashley why she thought they might be siblings, and Ashley said Eboni’s picture had always been on her grandmother’s mantel, and she’d been told she had an older sister. Eboni wanted to find out if it was true. Heather said they were all learning and recognizing that words could hurt, and she’d made a mistake. She’d wanted to say Eboni was eloquent, and said articulate. Eboni said it was a trigger word because the subtext was that Black people weren’t expected to speak the King’s English properly. LuAnn said, like Ramona does, and everyone laughed Eboni said she wasn’t fragile that way, and in her interview, she said she’d been pleasantly surprised at the opportunities she’d had to connect to the other women over the weekend.

Ramona met with real estate broker Michael, and in her interview, she said she needs to work in real estate, and make some money. Money is an aphrodisiac to her. She said it was good to have a sponsor, and Michael went through some basics with her, like how wording had changed. For example, a master was now a primary. There were no his and hers bathrooms, or bachelor pads. In Ramona’s interview, she said it was a different world. She was unfiltered, and had to be careful. Michael suggested Ramona go to some open houses.

Eboni met Leah at Martin’s boxing ring. In Leah’s interview, she said her grandmother’s memorial service was beautiful, but sad. The rain didn’t stop. She told Eboni that she was trying to have perspective, and think of her grandmother when she was making a decision. Sonja joined them and in her interview, Leah said she and Eboni were Virgos, and problem solvers. They wanted to make sure Sonja wasn’t stepped on anymore by LuAnn and Ramona. Sonja didn’t get the respect she deserved, and could be a punching bag. In Eboni’s interview, she said they were trying to convince Sonja that she’s the star. They didn’t want Sonja putting up with crap like them kicking her when she was down, and thinking she won’t fight back. Martin told Sonja, fight this sh*t.

Everyone voted, including Leah, who went with Martin, while LuAnn brought her dog. Eboni had an election party, inviting friend Natalie as well. In Eboni’s interview, she said it was the election of a lifetime, and there was a woman on the ticket as Vice President. Leah brought her sister Sarah, and LuAnn came in wearing a JFK mask. In LuAnn’s interview, she said now Leah could focus on the beautiful moments she had with her grandmother. Ramona never showed, and Leah said she claimed she wanted to go to Long Island because she was worried about safety in the city, since people might be protesting. In Leah’s interview, she said both she and Ramona lived in luxury high rises. They were good. In Sonja’s interview, she thought Ramona just didn’t want to come to a political party. Leah’s chihuahua Angel kept getting into the food on the table, and in LuAnn’s interview, she said Leah’s dog reflected Leah; she had no discipline. Thank God she didn’t have a torch.

Eboni said that Harlem was the heart and soul of NYC for her, and she was hosting a Night in Harlem party. In Eboni’s interview, she said Harlem was what spoke to her about NYC. Next, Eboni’s dog was caught noshing on the beautiful spread Eboni had put out, and in her interview, she said Leah’s dog was a bad influence. Ramona called and video chatted with everyone for a hot minute. Afterward, Sonja told everyone how Ramona was suddenly posting pictures of herself with her new Black friends, including Eboni, on social media. Sonja said she didn’t like when people wore a cause like a handbag. Eboni said if Ramona was posting pictures rapid-fire of the Black women in her life, it might be to counteract accusations of being racist. She felt gullible. Ramona was being a performative ally. Sonja jumped up, and said she didn’t like fakes. Unless you were living it, feeling it, breathing it, STFU. In Leah’s interview, she said she and Eboni had wanted Sonja to gain confidence, but they created a monster. In Eboni’s interview, she said Sonja had the tolerance of 7^th grader, and she was a glass and a half beyond that. In LuAnn’s interview, she said she used to be a happy drunk with Sonja. Now Sonja had taken a turn for the worse. It was hard to watch. LuAnn got the hell out of there, and in Sonja’s interview, she said she thought the party was really fun. She’d thought it might be preachy, but she felt comfortable.

When everyone was finally gone, Eboni threw back the rest of her glass of wine.

Next time, Victoria tells LuAnn that she’s a lot better, Eboni’s Night in Harlem party, and Ramona doesn’t want to be educated. What a surprise.

👀 Eyeballs Officially Falling Out…

That was quite a night of TV. See you tomorrow, for soap, Wives, and some LVP dogs. Until then, stay safe, stay accountable, and stay living it, feeling it, and breathing it, whatever it is for you.