Category Archives: Bravo

Mar9

March 8, 2016 — GH, Haves, Nots & Wives

Posted on March 9, 2016 by theresakp

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Lulu and Dante are all lovey-dovey, with hearts popping out of their eyes and bluebirds flying around with ribbons in their mouths.

Anna talks to Robert about the Carrrlos trail being cold. While someone sneaks around her place, Paul rings the bell. He tells her they have a lot to discuss. She tells him she’s had the feeling that someone has been following her. That’s because someone has been. Carrrlos, maybe?

Jordan calls Andre. She has an ark to go with his Indiana Jones hat. He invites her over to the bar, but she has her hands full with work and asks for a rain check.

Elizabeth interrupts Nicholas’s perusal of The Great Gatsby. She says she knows the look on his face and he’s doomed.

Hayden wonders why Baxter is in Port Charles. I’d be wondering what he’s doing at the MetroCourt with Sam. He and Sam talk phony finances. Curtis runs into Hayden in the hallway and she blows him off and gets out of there. Sam says she has a family emergency and has to go. Baxter tells her to settle the tab because he’s a real d-bag.

Sam makes a call to the first number on Baxter’s contact list. When she says she’s a friend of Rachel’s, they hang up.

Curtis follows Hayden to the bar. He wonders why she looks shaken. He thinks she ran into someone she knew who she didn’t want to see.

Paul asks if Robert has made any progress in finding Carrrlos. Anna says Robert followed the trail to London and then, nothing. She says Carrrlos might be using it as a jumping off point and to establish new identities for him and Sabrrrina. Paul says they can now work openly and honestly with each other, and says his admiration for her grows each day. Anna isn’t having any, and says she wouldn’t trust Paul as far as she could throw him.

Dante says he wants to rebuild the relationship and stay together for the rest of their lives. Lulu says they can’t rush things and forget what happened. They need to stop blaming and start forgiving. Hmm… They start making out and it looks like they’re rushing something here.

Andre shows up at Jordan’s office with some food. He says the way things have been going, this might be their last meal together.

Anna says her view of Paul hasn’t changed. She says the only reason they’re still talking is that she needs him to capture Carrrlos. She says it doesn’t end until Julian is in a prison cell, and if they end up there too, so be it. He asks what if there’s another way?

Curtis tries to get Hayden to tell him what’s going on, but she says everything is fine. She was only shocked to see someone from another life. He says the past has a way of catching up. He asks if she’s in trouble.

Nicholas tells Elizabeth he’s happy with Hayden. Elizabeth says if he’s happy, she’s happy, like I believe it. She thanks him for his hospitality and tells him if it gets to be too much with the kids, to let her know. When she leaves, Nicholas gets a call from Sam.

Sam says Baxter pretended not to know Hayden. She tells him about calling the number he excused himself to call and how they hung up after she said she was a friend of Rachel’s. She says by the time she called back again, the number was disconnected. Um… I don’t think that can be done that fast, so let me pretend it was a throwaway cell number. Nicholas tells her to forget everything and drop the case.

For not rushing things, Dante and Lulu are getting pretty busy. Lulu suddenly puts on the brakes. She tells Dante she thought things had changed for her, but they haven’t.

Paul wants to give Carrrlos immunity in order to nail Julian. He says life isn’t always neat and tidy, and sometimes you have to make a mess to make things better, sounding a little like Edward Albee.

Hayden tells Curtis she’s not in trouble. He says she left the MetroCourt like someone was chasing her, and just downed two stiff drinks. He says he’s concerned about her and wants to help her free of charge. He asks if her husband knows about the past she’s running from.

Sam is shocked that Nicholas wants to close the book on Hayden. She says she knows Baxter is lying. She says what if Hayden’s in trouble and needs him to protect her. Nice try. Nicholas says thanks for the help, but we’re done. He hangs up and eavesdropper Elizabeth is standing there. Geez, if you can’t be alone at Windemere, where can you be alone?

Dante says he gets it. Lulu says she doesn’t want to beat up on him and knows he’s sorry. He says they should get rid of the bed and then the loft. He suggests they get a house with a swing set and herb garden. Lulu says if they’re moving forward, they have to be honest and she doesn’t want an herb garden. He says he wants them to have a king size bed that they pick out together. She says they’re not done healing and that they just got divorced. She says she’s not sure they can put things back together on their own; they need help

Andre talks about Morgan. Jordan says their lives are going to intersect that way. He says last time they met, she accused him of trying to analyze her and he was just trying to get to know her. She apologizes for over-reacting. She says her history with Curtis is difficult to talk about. Andre says it’s her call if and when she wants to talk about it. She says she did something she regrets and Curtis tried to intervene, but destroyed people’s lives instead. I’m definitely intrigued.

Sam bumps into Hayden. She asks if Hayden is meeting Nicholas. Hayden says she had a business meeting, but missed it. She asks why Sam is there and all dressed up, since usually biker chick fashion is her thing. Sam says she was just out for a drink, but this place isn’t her speed.

Elizabeth says it’s clear that Nicholas doesn’t trust Hayden. He says that friendship has it’s limits and she’s over-stepping her bounds. He says she heard him tell Sam forget about it. Elizabeth asks why he married Hayden if he doesn’t trust her.

Anna says Paul is assuming Carrrlos has kept his mouth shut, and what about Sabrrrina. Paul says she’ll want to protect he father of her baby. He says sooner or later, Carrrlos is going to need help. Anna says the only person they could reach out to is Paul. She asks if he funded the trip to London and takes his silence as an answer. She says when they run out of money, they’ll have to call Paul. She says when they do, she’d better be the first call he makes afterward. She says he’d better not play her and he says he takes both business and pleasure very seriously.

Jordan and Andre make plans for another date. Andre says he’d like it to be outside of her office and suggests going dancing. He leaves and Jordan is all smiley. Oops, he forgot his hat. Someone’s at the door, but it’s Curtis. Didn’t they pass each other?

Elizabeth says she doesn’t want Nicholas to get hurt the way he did with Britt. She says he’s paying someone to find out why he doesn’t trust her. She says he should get out before it’s too late and show Hayden the door. Oops! Hayden is there and says that she wants to talk to her husband. Elizabeth makes an exit and Hayden asks if it’s true that Nicholas is having her investigated. He says it’s true, but he called it off. She asks if it’s because of what he found out, and he says no, it’s because of what he didn’t, making perfect sense…not.

Lulu says they need an objective third person and they need to stop talking to the people they know and not talking to each other. Dante is on board with that, and says what they’re doing feels right. She says it will feel more right later and she’s leaving before she changes her mind. Before she leaves, she tells him if he burned the bed, she won’t lose any sleep.

Anna tells Paul if Carrrlos contacts him, she wants to be the first to know. Paul says when he contacts Paul, he’ll call her. That was fast. Paul gets a call from Carrrlos as soon as he’s on the porch.

Curtis is pissed because Jordan told people that he’s a drug addict and he’s been clean for years. If she wants him to stay out of her business, she’d better stay out of his. He says she’s got a lot to be concerned about with her past and she needs to keep her mouth shut and so will he.

Nicholas says he knows there’s more to the Rachel story than Hayden has told him, but he doesn’t care. All he knows is that they love each other. He says maybe one day she ‘ll tell him the rest of the story. He says he felt sick when he realized he was prying into a past that had nothing to do with him. He says all that matters is today and that they’re happy. He told Sam to drop it and that she told him nothing because there’s nothing to tell. She thanks him and he thanks her for not getting angry. She says she’s not thrilled about Elizabeth, and he says he’ll make sure she understands the situation and stays out of Hayden’s way. He tells Hayden she’s his priority and I want to marry him.

Elizabeth meets Sam. Elizabeth says she overheard Nicholas and Sam talking, and heard Nicholas telling her to drop the investigation. Sam tells her to discuss it with Nicholas. Elizabeth says Sam should keep investigating for Spencer’s sake and that even if Sam thinks Nicholas deserves it, Spencer will be the one who ends up with the biggest broken heart. She says if that matters to Sam, she should continue.

Tomorrow, Carly doens’t want Jason working for Sonny, Tracy goes to the crypt, and Felix tells Michael that Sabrrrina really loves him.

The Haves and The Have Nots

Jeffrey tells Justin it’s very freeing to come out and asks if he’s like a kiss. Candace comes home and Justin tells her she had a break-in. He asks if she knows Quita. She says yes and Jeffrey says she forgot to give Quita the key. Not much Justin can say at this point, so he leaves.

After he’s gone, Candace asks Jeffrey why Justin’s zipper was unzipped. Jeffrey tells Candace that Quita was looking for Quincy and asks what she did with him. She says she took care of it. He asks for his keys and she says she doesn’t know where they are. She asks again about Justin’s pants.

Jeffrey tells Candace he can track his keys on a phone and she gives him hers. Erica comes by and asks who Jeffrey is .Candace introduces him and says he’s not on their team. Jeffrey says the phone says the keys are there. He goes to look.

Erica asks Candace if she told Benny about the mortgage. Candace says no and Erica says she’s running out of time and Warlock is serious. Jeffrey comes back and says his keys are in the backyard under the dirt. Candace tells him no. Erica wonders why the keys would be there.

Jeffrey starts to dig and Candace stops him. She tells Erica she’ll talk to her later. When Erica leaves, Candace tells the suddenly clueless Jeffrey to give her the phone. She calls War and he says he put the keys with “the package.” She tells Jeffrey to call a locksmith because his keys are gone. She has to repeat herself and finally tells him they’re with Quincy. Jeffrey freaks that she buried Quincy in the backyard. She says it’s not like Jeffrey was helping, which is so true.

Jeffrey tells her what happened with Justin and that he thinks Justin is suspicious. Candace says they can use this. She tells Jeffrey to play Justin and find out what he knows. Jeffrey says Quita told him the neighbor said three men went in, but only two went out. Candace says they can’t move the body because cameras are trained on the house. Jeffrey says Justin put a gun to his head and Candace is like, welcome to my life. Jeffrey says Justin is crazy and Candace tells Jeffrey to be crazy. She tells Jeffrey to call a locksmith and says she has to speak to Benny.

Hanna is rifling through cupboards and cushions at the Cryer house. Is she looking for change? She pulls out every dollar from every pocket, change purse and whatever else she can find.

Wyatt is partying and when some guy tells him to slow down, he tosses him out. The hotel room is full of lowlifes sharing the wealth and there’s a huge plate of cocaine on the table.

Quita gets sprung and meets Veronica in her car outside. Quita says there’s a hit out on Veronica, and one of their boys is at her house right now. She says he has orders to shoot whoever comes in first. Veronica asks why she’s telling her this. Quita says she needs Veronica’s help to find Quincy. She tells Veronica about what she found at Candace’s and that Jeffrey was driving Quincy’s car. She says she knows Candace and Jeffrey must have done something to Quincy. Veronica tells her to calm down and go home and she’ll call her later.

David comes to the jail and asks when Veronica was processed. The guard says she left a half hour ago. He tries to visit Jim, but that’s a no since he’s not authorized.

Kathryn meets with Lloyd and finds out about the $12 million that Wyatt was given. He says he tried to call her. He also tells her about the $7 million Jim moved to the “Candy Cane Company” that was allocated for taxes and that they have to pay the bill. She tells him to move the money. He also tells her that Jim’s lawyer thinks they should move a bunch of money out in case of a lawsuit.

When Kathryn gets home, Hanna comes out and tells her she went through everything and came up with 900 dollars and she’ll expect the rest of her pay on the first of the month. Kathryn gives her whatever from her pocketbook. Hanna says she just wants what’s owed her. Kathryn says no one, not even her mother, has cared for her like Hanna has and if she walks out the door, Kathryn is lost.Hanna tells her she’s already lost. She asks what she can give Hanna and Hanna says she’s not for sale.

Kathryn says Hanna isn’t Candace and tells Hanna about the $7 million. She says she knows Candace must have been blackmailing Jim. She tells Hanna about Wyatt getting his trust fund and says she can’t bury another child. She begs Hanna not to leave. Hanna says she has to go. Kathryn asks if this is it and Hanna says she has to check on her grandson. She leaves, leaving Kathryn saying, please.

Mitch shows Jeffrey the paper with the picture of him and Veronica. Apparently his first concern is the age difference. He says that he pissed David off and now David is messing with their business. Mitch asks what David wants and David says details. Mitch tells him to spill, but Benny says that’s for Veronica to do. Candace comes in to talk to Benny.

Mitch leaves and Candace asks if Benny has seen War. Benny says he tried to get him to go into business with him, but it was a no. In the coincidence that is only soap opera world, War comes in. War gives Candace a hug and whispers not to try anything. He says he’ll call her later.

When he leaves, Candace tells Benny that he should stay away from War. She asks him what’s going on and how business is. He says good and she asks if he thought about the lawsuit. He says he has what he needs already. She says she spoke to someone who said he can get $10 million, but Benny says he wants to make his own money. He asks why it’s important to her and she says there’s something she needs to handle and she’s going to have to mortgage the the house and tow yard. Benny says no way. He asks what kind of problem she has. When she doesn’t want to say, he tells her to get out.

He says she’s lost her mind and asks if she’s in trouble. He says he’ll kill whoever it is. She says she’s not in trouble and he repeats who is it. She says it’s just a business opportunity that she’s going to miss. He tells her to never ask him again. She pretends she was kidding and asks if he’ll still meet with the lawyer. She says he won’t even have to go to court since they’ll probably settle. He says he’ll think about it.

The party at Wyatt’s hotel room continues. Now he’s shooting up. No good can possibly come from this.

Kathryn visits Jim in his cell. He tells her she looks good, and she says she’s not in the mood for a nice Jim right now, because that means he’s worried. She tells him about Lloyd and that Hanna quit. He says it’s the first step to a lawsuit. She tells him about Wyatt getting his inheritance. Jim asks where he is and she says she doesn’t know. He says to find Wyatt and rip DA Jennifer a new one.

Jennifer can’t find Wyatt either. David comes busting in and asks where Veronica is and if she left a home address. He manhandles Jennifer and says he needs to see Jim. She tells him to see Maggie. She says he has time for Maggie and not for her, since he’s the only man on earth. He asks her to please let him see Jim. She tells him five minutes and calls to give him allowance.

Candace and Benny visit a lawyer. He thinks it will be an easy case and settlement a good possibility. Candace says she’ll contact the grandfather of the little girl who was killed. The lawyer says she should be a lawyer. She says she’s in law school and he says if she can make this happen, he’ll offer her a position when she graduates.

Hanna is at the hospital to see Quincy Jr. The doctor says she can’t see him and she has to talk to child welfare. The social worker tells her that it’s been decided Quincy Jr. is better off with Candace since Hanna has no home for him. Hanna says Candace got to her. She says she did what’s best for her grandson. Hanna asks if she can see him before Candace gets him, but Aliyah says no.

Erica asks Candace what Benny said, and she says he lost it when she brought up the mortgage. Erica says she can forge the documents in an hour. Candace doesn’t want to do it, but Erica says this is War she’s dealing with. Candace makes a phone call, telling the grandfather about the pending lawsuit and asking if he would like to join them. She asks if he’ll meet her later at the house. Erica says she can pay the mortgage back as soon as they win the case. She says she’s going to work on the deeds and Candace doesn’t have a choice.

Veronica drives up to her house. She looks on the surveillance camera from her tablet and sees a guy hanging out inside. She calls Maggie and tells her thanks for planting the picture. She says she knew her marriage was over but didn’t have the guts to end it. She says she wants to talk to Maggie about some sensitive David issues and asks her to meet her at the house. Great move!

Next week, David visits Jim who says it’s too late, Hanna wants to see Candace, and Kathryn threatens to kill Jennifer..

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Erika is having a dinner party. Those always go so well. Yolanda calls. She’s having a bad day and Erika lets her off the hook to come.

LisaR and Kathryn are taking a limo together. Kathryn is anxious to meet Erika’s husband, Tom. Lisa says he’s super smart and has charisma up the kazoo. I think that’s gazoo, Lisa.

Erika doesn’t do cooking, so a fabulous meal is being prepared by chefs. She says she doesn’t tell Tom about the petty nonsense that goes on between the girls, so he’s clueless about what happened at Yolanda’s party. Eileen also can’t make it because she’s working. LisaV also has to leave early due to a charity event.

Kathryn bugs LisaR about not eating. For the love of all that’s holy, leave her alone. Ken is there, but the other husbands have work duties. Tom joins the group. He seems like a pretty cool guy.

They sit down to dinner. LisaV brings up Tom calling her a worthy opponent and he says she’s the only one he has in life. He says he decided to be a lawyer because of watching Perry Mason. LisaR talks about how kids come up to her husband and say LA Law inspired them.

Kathryn bugs LisaR about eating again. She claims she’s just joking and Lisa says she’s pushing it. She thinks Kathryn is being inappropriate and threatens to repeat her performance in Holland. LisaV suggest giving her a sippy cup and the mood lightens.

Erika says it’s slow process for her to show emotion. Kathryn asks if people have to prove themselves to her and gets a little animated. Tom gets involved in the conversation and in her individual interview, Erika says Kathryn doesn’t have to hit them over the head with her personality. Erika says closeness develops over time and Kathryn says to throw her a freakin’ bone. In her interview, LisaR says Kathryn is being loud and aggressive, and she’d like to muzzle her. Erika says she’s not cold, but cautious and LisaV says it comes across that way sometimes. Lisa says she has a problem of coming across controlling and brings up the web making comment.

Erika tells Kathryn thanks a lot, since she thought she was confiding in her. Kathryn says she was glad Erika opened up. Erika rolls her eyes and Kathryn tells her knock it off. Erika is like why are you telling at me in my own home? Kathryn says she’s losing the argument and Tom wonders if they do this all the time. Erika says they don’t have to like her and LisaR asks why Kathryn felt the need to repeat what Erika said. Kathryn says she wanted a reaction. LisaR says hallelujah for honesty. Erika says Kathryn put a wedge between her and LisaV’s potential friendship.

LisaV keeps interjecting things about the web comment. Tom says it’s both a positive and negative statement. Kathryn says maybe LisaV didn’t get the gist. Lisa says, oh now it’s my fault, joking around. She says she really has to jet, but it’s been real and she’d like to get to know Erika better. Tom says something about her having to leave, even though Bravo’s preview led us to belive he was asking Kathryn to leave. Actually, I wouldn’t blame him if he asked everyone to leave.

Erika is appalled at the whole thing and says it’s not what she wanted. Has she ever watched this show and seen how dinner parties end up? Hell, she was in the midst of one last week. She adds that she’d never come to someone’s home, meet their husband for the first time and act like an ass. So, she’d wait for the second time? LisaR says Kathryn doesn’t have malicious intent, but she likes to push buttons and she’s had enough now. Erika rates the dinner party as a negative 5 and says she’s never doing that again.

Commercial break. The Real Housewives of NYC starts on April 6.

Erika and Kyle are playing a game of tennis. Neither of them is very good and I identify. Kyle talks about how Mauricio’s company is involved with Habitat for Humanity. He just got back from Dubai and Kyle wants to open a store there. Kyle asks her how the party went. Erika says she tried to keep the whole conversation to a minimum in front of her husband, and now he’s pissed because he doesn’t like her being catty.

Kathryn and Don are shopping and he asks about the dinner party. Kathryn acts like butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth about spreading the web comment. Don misuses that honesty word in true Wives fashion, saying Kathryn just tells it like it is. He does say she can be a little brutal at times though. Kathryn says she thinks she’s fair. I don’t know about that, but she sure has a big mouth.

LisaR and Eileen meet at the beach. Eileen says she’s been doing a lot of stunts on her show and has been having a lot of fun. Lisa says her hat’s off to Eileen for being in the soap business for over 30 years. Mine is too. Eileen questions Lisa’s reaction to Erika presenting LisaV as manipulative. LisaR says she wanted to be LisaV’s cheerleader, and she thinks LisaV can be manipulative, but so can a lot of them. Then she opens her big mouth and tells Eileen about how Kyle and LisaV passed comments back and forth about Yolanda. She says LisaV encouraged her to bring up the Munchausen’s issue. She says she’s allowed herself to be used as a pawn. Eileen says she’s speechless. So am I. None of these women are children, and I think they should all put their big girl panties on and think for themselves.

LisaR tells Eileen that Yolanda had lunch with Brandi and Kim the same day she canceled on Erika. Eileen thinks it’s her business, but she probably shouldn’t have worn herself out when she knew she had a commitment. Eileen says since she’s ill, she gives her a pass. Lisa says she thinks Yolanda uses her illness to her advantage. Lisa says something emotional isn’t being dealt with. Eileen says that’s not her experience with Yolanda. She says her gut feeling says to run from Yolanda since she’s more manipulative than anybody.

Kathryn, accompanied by Don, is getting a hearing test. She’s deaf in one ear. She says when she’s in a loud environment, the background noise sounds like Charlie Brown’s teacher. She sees the doctor after the test. She says that people think she’s being rude when she really doesn’t hear them. Having loss of hearing in one ear, I totally understand this. The doctor offers her some kind of new device that she says is music to her ear. BA-DUM-BUM!

Kyle brings Yolanda some flowers. Yolanda is getting an award from the Global Lyme Alliance. She’s invited the girls to New York. She wants them to see that her problem is many people’s problem. Kyle wants to discuss the email. Yolanda says she felt attacked by Kyle. Kyle says it was between them and Yolanda sent it to everyone, but Yolanda says everyone was there for the original argument. She says she just wants clarity in her friendships with everyone and she’s better with one on one communication. Which totally explains why she wanted everyone to get the email. Kyle decides to just agree and move on, even though she didn’t really get an answer as to why Yolanda wanted to hang on to their altercation.

The ladies gather for the Habitat for Humanity gig. LisaR says none of them have manual labor skills, so this should be good. Eileen is working and will be joining them later. Mauricio explains the program to them on their way there. I do have manual labor skills and would love to do this.

Kyle says it should be interesting to see a group of ladies who don’t even paint their own nails paint a house. More about Habitat for Humanity is explained.

LisaV thanks Erika for dinner. She keeps joking about the web thing and Erika is over it. Later, Kyle says she’s afraid of spiders and it starts again. LisaV privately tells Kyle enough now. She says Erika has had enough and she’s obviously not laughing.

Erika tells LisaR and Eileen that she doesn’t trust Kathryn any more after she repeated what Erika said and then went through it at the dinner party. Eileen wants them to talk to each other and suggests asking Kathryn to come in on the conversation. Eileen asks Kathryn why she brought up the web thing at Erika’s house. Erika says she has a hard time having a relationship with LisaV because of her. Why would Lisa want to be friends with her and nice to her now? She says Tom was trying to get to know Kathryn. Kathryn says he’s lovely and Erika asks how she would know since she talked the whole time. Erica is waving her hand around and telling Kathryn to listen for once Kathryn tells her not to do that with her hand and Erika says, or what? Ooh, white rich people thug life. I’m also paraphrasing since Erika is talking pretty fast.

Erika says she wants to be friends with Kathryn, but this has hurt their friendship. Kathryn says she can be trusted, as long as she lets her know she needs to be trusted. LisaR says Kathryn is full of it and that she should have known better. Kathryn apologizes, but says they’re overly sensitive in her interview. Erica says she’ll give a person a second chance, but not a third.

Next week, the ladies go to a women’s cancer event, a dog slaughter protest goes in the wrong direction, Yolanda calls everyone out, and David Foster pretends to be a loving husband.

Mar8

March 7, 2016 — GH & Vanderpump Tries to Rule

Posted on March 8, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Sam is meeting Baxter. She’s speaking with Nicholas on the phone when Baxter walks in. They’re meeting at a bar that looks suspiciously like The Floating Rib, even though I thought they were supposed to meet in NYC. What did I miss?

Lulu asks to come in and Dante says of course. She sees the divorce decree. He says it seems so final, and it is, but seeing it in black and white is different. Lulu asks him to hear her out.

Sonny asks Carly if she’s going to leave him, and she says he doesn’t want to ask her that tonight. I guess that means she’s not in the best mood. She says she loves him, and he says he knows, but he also knows love has its limits. Carly says she’s hurt that he didn’t trust her. He says he was trying to protect her. She says she knows exactly the business strategy he was going for, but she hates that the business causes him to lie to her and the kids. She says she actually loves that he’s an alpha male and doesn’t feel she has the right to be angry about it. She’s angry at herself.

Lulu says she still feels all over the place, but mostly just sad about what happened to them. She says when Dante saved her life, it put everything in perspective and she realized she’s been unfair. She’s about to tell him something important when there’s a knock at the door.

Nicholas has ensconced Elizabeth and the boys at Windemere. Hayden says she knows Elizabeth is his dearest friend, but she obviously doesn’t like Hayden. She says they’re newlyweds and it is a little crowded. Why are these people on top of each other? It’s a castle for Pete’s sake. Nicholas says she seems sad and Hayden says she knows how he can cheer her up.

Baxter looks like a character out of American Psycho. Sam says she just went through a divorce and attained some big assets. She says she fudged a little, using the financial bigwig’s name to get him to meet her. He says it wouldn’t be the first time someone did that, but who did recommend him?

Hayden says Nicholas doesn’t know how much she needed that and I don’t want to know what it was. She says she called the hospital to see how Tracy is, and tells Nicholas what happened at the MetroCourt. She says it’s left her on edge and he asks when she became so attached to Tracy.

Dr. Mays, Griffin and Monica are in Tracy’s room. Griffin wants to observe the tests. Tracy is like, why not invite the whole world in? Dr. Mays says that Tracy’s MRI confirmed multiple brain lesions, which could indicate more than one brain tumor. They have to determine if it’s operable, but they need to see if it’s malignant first. Tracy asks if she has cancer and Monica says they don’t know yet.

Baxter talks to Sam about investments. Sam tells Baxter that “Rachel” was right about him and shows him her picture.

It’s Olivia at Dante’s door. She’s there to pick up Rocco’s blanket and gets nosy about the both of them being there together.

Carly says she’s angry with herself for looking the other way and enjoying the power without counting the cost. She goes over some of the things that have happened with their family and says she should have learned from it. She says after that, she hid her love for him, but when he kissed her at the hospital and Sonny said he knew her better than she knew herself, she was hooked again. He says now he’s losing her all over again.

Carly says she’s not leaving Sonny. What would be the point? They’d just end up with other people and break their hearts. Carly says she’d crawl on broken glass to be with Sonny, and that’s never going to change. He tells her the feeling is mutual. He says he needs her more than he’s ever needed anyone and always will. She asks how long always is.

Dante tells Olivia they were in the middle of something. The phone rings and it’s the station, telling him Raj was spotted. He leaves and Olivia says she doesn’t know whose timing is worse, hers or the criminals. She recognizes Lulu is worried about Dante because she loves him.

Griffin tells Tracy not to jump the gun on the prognosis. Dr. Mays says someone will let her know once the tests are scheduled.

Hayden says Tracy calls her at least once a week about ELQ. She says Tracy’s goal is to waste her time and annoy her. She says she never thought of Tracy as anything but a minor nuisance, but when she collapsed, it brought back Hayden’s father having a heart attack. She says he recovered and when she visited him in the hospital, he said he’d never leave her.

Baxter says he’s grateful for the recommendation, but he doesn’t remember Rachel. Sam says Rachel told her she ran into him in Vegas. Baxter said he was there, but he would have remembered such a beautiful woman. He excuses himself to check in with the Hong Kong office. Sam says to herself that he might be a good liar, but she’s better.

Nicholas says Hayden never talks about her family. She says her parents are gone now and she doesn’t see any reason to look back. She says she has a surprise for Nicholas.

Lulu says Dante is smart and doesn’t take unnecessary risks, but then she worries this will be the time something goes wrong and she’ll never be able to tell him what she came to tell him. Olivia tells her not to take for granted that someone will always be there and to say what she has to say while she has the chance. They hug, exchange I love yous, and Olivia leaves. Lulu picks up Dante’s wedding ring.

Carly says she knows the world is a dangerous place, and Sonny perpetuates the cycle with the business he’s in. Sonny says he tries his best to keep the peace and that if he wasn’t there, someone worse would take his place. Carly says he makes crime look good and danger look sexy and it’s not. She just wants it to stop.

Tracy is getting ready to leave the hospital, and Monica stops by. Tracy says she’ll be back when the biopsy is scheduled, and until then she’s moving on with her life. Monica says she needs support and isn’t doing herself any favors by isolating. Tracy says she’s leaving and Monica should do the same.

Griffin asks Monica how Tracy is. She says that Tracy is her own worst enemy, so she’s going to monitor things whether Tracy likes it or not. She asks Griffin if he has a second opinion and he says he has a few ideas. Monica tells him to pursue them. He says Dr. Mays won’t be happy and Monica is like, too bad for him.

Hayden gives Nicholas a first edition of The Great Gatsby as a wedding gift. She wrote an inscription, but she doesn’t want him to read it with her there because she’s embarrassed by sentiment. She tells im to read it after she’s gone. She’s going to the office, maybe just a little to avoid Elizabeth.

Baxter returns and Sam says she’s interested in having him manage her account. She asks Baxter to get her a scotch on the rocks. While he’s at the bar, she takes a screen shot of his phone contact list.

Lulu is looking at family photos when Dante gets back. He says it was a false alarm. Lulu grabs Dante and starts kissing him. He kisses her back.

Carly says she keeps thinking about Kiki bleeding on the pier. Sonny passes the responsibility ball to Ava. Carly says Ava is a terrible person, but Sonny needs to handle his own situation without guns. Using what? Balloon animals? Good luck with that.

Monica brings Tracy her anti-seizure meds and says she has to be diligent about following instructions. Tracy says Monica probably can’t wait for her to keel over and join Alan in the crypt. Monica says she’s put up with her for years and if she doesn’t like Monica overseeing things, than tough.

Nicholas reads the inscription: To my Gatsby, Love always, Your Daisy.

That’s the sentiment she was embarrassed about? I’m disappointed. Nicholas flashes back to asking Hayden to marry him. Wasn’t hat like a week ago?

Baxter is telling Sam about Asian investments, when Hayden almost walks into the bar. I guess it is The Floating Rib. What happened to the NYC plans?

Lulu tells Dante he’d said the divorce didn’t matter and he loves her no matter what, and she feels the same way. She says as long as they’re alive, they have a chance, and she wants to take it. Dante says him too. They decide to get back together.

Sonny says he’ll do what he can to deescalate the violence, but he doesn’t know how much he can help. Carly says it’s enough that he heard her. They talk about when they got back together the last time. They make some cute banter and end with I love yous. What is this? The Valentine’s Day episode?

Tomorrow, Lulu and Dante are together again, Hayden tells Nicolas that Baxter is lying, and Curtis asks Hayden if she’s in trouble.

Vanderpump Rules

Giggy! It’s just the opening credits, but omg, I love that dog. He is my TV dog crush, and next to my own, the cutest dog on the planet.

It looks like the servers are actually working at SUR. Katie blindsides Lisa by asking if she can have her engagement party at Lisa’s house. Like a kid who wants a dog, she says she’ll take care of it and clean up after it. Lisa says okay to a small barbecue. And they’d better be gone by sundown. The subject of Stassi being invited comes up, but Lisa isn’t having it. She puts the kibosh on Kristen as well. Katie is like, sorry, Stassi and Kristen.

Tom is getting ready to shoot a music video with his band Charles McMansion. They’ve spent 9K so far, and haven’t even filmed yet. An esthetician comes to Tom’s house to give Tom and Ariana facials with all the works in preparation. Is this in the budget? Tom says he doesn’t want a shot ruined by bad skin. Isn’t that king of thing that’s fixed on the film later?

James and Kristen meet at a wine bar. James has been sober for a whole week, so this is a great place for a rendezvous. In her individual interview, Kristen gloats over being able to drink buckets of free wine, while James can’t, proving once again that she’s not even human. Kristen tells James she hopes his last escapade was rock bottom. Kristen says she’s moved on and she’s happy (with some guy named Carter). They get some food, and as always on these shows, it looks fantastic.

Kristen brings up Lala. James says he’s not even interested in her. I give James the side eye. Kristen asks if he slept with mutual friend Jenna and he says yes, although he’d lied to her about it during the relationship. Kristen jumps up from the table, and won’t even give James a good-bye. Because she’s totally moved on and is happy with Carter. They talk outside the bar. James tells her he’s missed her and how they used to be best friends in the beginning. He says he misses her when he sees that little glare in her eye, and I choke on my cup o’ tomato soup.

Kristen says she’s a real catch, causing me to choke again. She hugs James and gives him a friend kiss. They go on down the sidewalk together, making me wonder if anyone paid the tab.

Kristen has been working on her T-shirt line for a year and a half now. She had a falling out with her original partner, and went into debt, but things seem to be picking up. Stassi has come with her to check on the line. Stassi asks if Kristen thinks that she’ll ever get back in with Katie, and then switches subject to Kristen making out with James in a car. She asks for details like it’s high school.

James tells Lala about the car make-out session. And how they ended up having sex on top of his beloved Beemer. Lala is like, you already have a huge string of misfortune in which Kristen is the common denominator and asks what the blip is wrong with him.

Scheana is at Katie and Schwartz’s place, helping with the engagement party plans. Schwartz says Katie isn’t giving much thought to the budget. She says Schwartz isn’t contributing many ideas. Katie tells them it’s going to be at Lisa’s house, but Lisa doesn’t want Kristen or Stassi there. Scheana flashes back to her own engagement party experience, and how Kristen created chaos with Stassi and says this is probably a good idea.

It’s a busy night at SUR. Lisa is talking to Jax on his break. He asks for Saturday night off because he’s due in court in Hawaii early on Monday. Lisa asks if he knows what the outcome is going to be, but he doesn’t. It could be anything from a slap on the wrist to jail time. Lisa says she’s glad in a way and asks if he’s learned a lesson. Jax says sometimes it doesn’t hit him until later what he’s done and he absolutely has remorse. Lisa says the only thing he does better than getting into trouble is getting out of it. She tells Jax okay on the day off and tells him hopefully, she’ll see him on Tuesday.

Some of the gang goes to the turtle races. Yes, you read that right. Stassi says she’s trying not to be aggressive with Katie in pushing the friendship. When Katie shows up, they share an awkward hug. Katie says Stassi does seem to have changed. Kristen has brought Carter, with whom Katie once had a one-night stand. Figures. More awkwardness. I think Schwatz is a little turned on though.

Kristen says she’s not thrilled with a dive bar turtle-racing date, but it’s a trade-off for stepping out on Carter with James. I think this looks like a weird and fun place to spend an evening. Katie breaks the bad news to Kristen and Stassi that they’re uninvited to the engagement party. Stassi says it blows, and Kristen says Lisa is still finding a way to yell at her even though she doesn’t work at SUR anymore.

Jax and the newly enhanced Brittany are out for dinner. More fabulous food! Brittany teases Jax about it being his last free meal and gets his hackles up. He says it’s not like he robbed a bank. They talk about the engagement party. Jax says he’s not fully on board with marriage, whatever that means. Oh, it’s the old why do you need a piece of paper argument. Well, there’s a lot of legal reasons for one. Brittany says she wants to know if they’re in a committed relationship or did Jax have her move there for nothing? Jax says he’s at a moment of crisis and talking about marriage right now is too much. I have to admit, this probably isn’t the best time to bring it up. Brittany says if you love someone, it’s important to move forward and Jax loses his appetite.

Schwarz and Jax are practicing some golf swings and Jax tells him about the marriage discussion. Jax hates hearing about Tom’s band, so he brings them up. Methinks Jax is jealous that Tom actually has some things going on in his life other than going to court. Schwartz tells him about having the party at Lisa’s place, and how Stassi and Kristen aren’t allowed to attend.

The music video is being set up. Schwartz is there to help and is impressed with the craft service table. Most of the cast is working for free and several of them are Tom’s co-workers. He’s left Scheana out because he knows it will be a grueling day and he can’t afford dealing with someone who wants to talk about feelings. Lala is featured in the video as a straight-laced woman unleashed by a sexual liberation machine. That first part will probably be a stretch for her.

Schwartz talks to Ariana about how she and Tom are being unfairly treated by the others. From what we see of it, the video actually looks pretty good.

The swans and ponies are in place at Villa Rosa. Schwartz is there wandering around and inadvertently lets the ponies into the house. Lisa appears, asking him if he’s crazy, saying they’re going to poop on the floor. She is not too thrilled. Schwartz tells her the party is going to be a “linen and lace theme,” but Lisa can dress however she wants. Gee, thanks. He talks about the food. Lisa keeps telling him how she wants the party six miles away from the house. She adds that she doesn’t want to see Stassi or Kristen either.

Stassi is apartment hunting. Ugh! One of the realtors has a man bun. The realtors leave them to discuss and instead of the apartment, they discuss the upcoming engagement party. They’ve decided to crash it regardless of Lisa’s wishes. They seem to think that Lisa would be concerned about appearing selfish and not ask them to leave. I don’t think they know Lisa very well. I’m not saying she might not let it go, but it won’t be for that reason.

It’s Friday night dinner prep at SUR. Jax says he’s leaving early to get ready for his flight. Scheana says Jax is being too nonchalant and needs to take it more seriously. He hopes he’ll be back in time for the party. Katie tells Ariana she hopes she and Tom can make it, and they don’t have to pretend to have too much fun. Bleh. She didn’t have to make that remark.

It’s time for Jax’s departure. Brittany asks what’s going to happen and wishes she could go with him. Jax says he feels like he’s in jail already in his apartment. He thinks it’s time to slow things down. He thinks letting Brittany moving in was a mistake and too much for him. I think he’s an idiot and Brittany is too good for him.

Next week — the finale (…sniff…) — Stassi and Kristen crash the engagement party, Jax fights with James, and Lala and Kristen tangle.

Mar7

March 6, 2016 — The Underworld, the Undead, Cait & Two Wives

Posted on March 7, 2016 by theresakp

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

OMG — this has been one busy night for TV! Both Once Upon A Time and I Am Cait are back, The Walking Dead soldiers on intensely, and The Real Housewives of Atlanta and Potomac will never end.

Once Upon A Time

Emma opens her eyes and finds Neil in her car He says to think of it as a long distance call from a friend. They talk about their son. Emma tells him she’s on her way to the Underworld. Neil tells her it’s a bad idea and it won’t end the way she thinks it will. She asks Neil for help. but he says the Underworld is for people with unfinished business and that’s not him. He tells her to stop what she’s doing, but of course she’s not going to. He wishes her well and disappears.

Emma finds herself back on the boat going to the Underworld.

The passengers debark the boat. The Underworld looks like Storybrooke — if it had been hit by a tornado. Regina says they’re not in Maine anymore. I hadn’t known they were in Maine to begin with. Emma sees someone she knows. Gold/Rumpelstiltskin tells them people are trapped here because of unfinished business and likely some of them are there because of them. Regina says the sooner they get out, the better.

Evil Queen Regina is berating her subjects. It’s her birthday and she wants Snow White’s heart on a plate. A dude tells her he knows where Snow White is, but he wants something in return. She says she’ll return the favor by killing him quickly. Snow comes up behind her with a bow and arrow and tells her to knock it off. Regina says they’re lucky she’s in a good mood and disappears, poof! in a cloud of purple smoke.

Regina’s father tells her not to let her merciless mother, Cora, win and control her. Regina says she banished her mother to Wonderland, but he says as long as she’s on this quest, she’s being controlled.

Apparently Cora is in hell too, because the message is sent to her that Regina is there.

Snow/Mary goes in the Underworld diner. The waitress is excited to see her. Snow says she’s looking for someone and describes Hook. David enters the diner and kisses her. What up wit dat? It turns out he’s David’s brother. He says to let David know there’s a new sheriff in town. He leaves ad the others enter. Henry brings her a room key. I have no idea what just went on there.

Regina sees a guy whose been following them. She calls him out and he says someone wants to see them.

Evil Queen Regina just wants her birthday to be over. I love the costumes on this show and she always gets the best ones. Her father, Henry, asks the Magic Mirror to summon…her. The mirror says he doesn’t have a death wish, but the father insists. Henry sees Cora in the mirror. He tells her to tell Regina to let go over the feud. She says no way, and that they should help her. Cora appears in a full length mirror and Henry says he doesn’t need her help and leaves. She says Regina does and comes out of the mirror.

In the Underworld, Regina meets Cora. They hug. Cora says she has unfinished business, meaning Regina. She says she wants Regina to be happy. Regina asks for help finding Hook. Cora says Regina’s friends and family are holding her back, and she has to do what’s best for her. She’s arranged for a boat in an hour and wants Regina to leave with Henry.

Cora reminds Regina of her last words, that Regina would have been enough. She says sometimes a mother has to do whatever for her daughter even if it’s reprehensible. Regina asks if she’s threatening her. She says no, she has to show her something.

They’re at a cliff and the messenger dude is on the precipice of a cliff with flames leaping below. Cora throws him off into the flames. Cora tells Regina that the Underworld can be left in two ways, to better place of worse one. Cora gives her another option, go home or there will be a cost and someone will suffer — her father.

Gold goes to his Underworld shop. He thinks about how he told Belle he had to go to the Underwold because he’s the only one who’s been there before. She tells him to come back to her and he says he always does. He goes to a safe in the shop and Peter Pan comes in asking if he’s looking for something. Gold says just because Peter sired him, doesn’t make him his father. He says Gold won’t find anything Peter doesn’t want him to find, and gives him a potion. Peter wants to make nice because he wants to go back, but Gold tells him it’s not going to happen. Peter suggests swapping himself for one of the others going back. He gives Gold the potion as a gesture of good will.

Regina tells the others she can’t let her father suffer because of her. She says after she killed him, she thought he went to a better place, but no. They argue, but Gold interrupts with the potion. He says it will allow them to talk to the dead and if they pour it over Hook’s grave, he can tell them where he is. He says he’s leaving on the next boat and they’ll have to handle this themselves. Bye, Felicia!

Snow meets Regina’s father in the woods. He says if the feud continues Regina will lose her soul and the kingdom will be destroyed. Snow hears another voice, and turns. Henry rips her heart out from behind because he’s really Cora. The real Henry, who had called her name, is like, wth? and Cora says, come on, Regina needs her birthday present.

The group goes to the graveyard and uses the potion. Hook appears, but the vision of him is all shaky and he disappears again.

Emma says Hook is in pain and suffering, and they still don’t know where he is. She tells the others to take the boat home, but David says they’re staying to back her up. She tells Regina to them and herself out of there.

The Evil Queen continues to celebrate her birthday by killing a jester. I’ll bet they don’t last long in this kingdom. Cora arrives at her birthday party. Regina asks how she got out of Wonderland and where’s her father. Cora says she lost track of him and gives her Snow’s beating heart. Regina is able to see Snow in the Magic Mirror and crushes her heart. Snow starts to clutch at her chest and panic. Regina is delighted until Jiminy Cricket pops out of Snow’s bodice and Regina realizes it’s not the right heart. Cora says someone must have switched them.

It was Henry. Henry says if Regina crushes Snow’s heart, she’ll be dark forever just like her mother and just what her mother wants. Regina says Henry betrayed her. He says as long as Snow lives, she has a chance, so whatever she does to him is worth it. She makes him disappear, poof! in a puff of blue smoke, and puts him in the box that held the heart. It reminds me of I Dream of Jeanie.

At the Underworld graveyard, Regina visits her father’s grave. He appears and she apologizes. He forgives her and tells her it’s okay. He says he loves her no matter what because that’s what fathers do. She says she doesn’t understand how he can be so good. He says her mother is using him to get her to leave, but he wants her to stay. He’s happy that she finally put vengeance aside. Regina says Cora is going to send him somewhere worse, and she can’t let that happen. He says if she stays, she’ll spread hope and to let him see her doing the right thing. He disappears, poof! in cloud of grey and orange smoke.

Cora asks Regina where her father ran off to and she shows Cora the box. Cora says she’s impressed. Regina says Henry might have been wrong about the revenge, but right about Cora. She says she wants it to be her victory. The Magic Mirror pulls Cora in. Cora says without her, Regina will fail and be alone. Regina says being alone is fine with her and Cora grabs the box, taking it into the mirror with her.

Henry stands on the edge of the cliff. Regina tells Cora to stop. Regina says she’s going to help her friends and her father. Cora says to do what she says and not force her hand. Regina says she doesn’t have to do it and Cora makes the flames swallow Henry. Whoa, wait, the flames disappear, and an extension goes out from the cliff. A heavenly light shows from above and Henry says it’s where he belongs. His unfinished business was with Regina. He let Cora get in the way of their relationship, but now Regina is free of her. Regina introduces Henry to his grandson and namesake. He tells young Henry to take good care of Regina and tells Regina not to forget who she really is.

He leaves and goes into the light. That was all pretty touching. If I wasn’t typing, I might have shed a tear or two.

Regina and Henry join the others. Gold (hasn’t he left yet?) says that the people here are not the dearly departed, just wretched souls not worth helping. He says he’s not sticking around, because no one heard him the first time. Henry dubs their quest Operation Firebird. The clock in the fallen clock tower ticks and Regina smiles.

Cora isn’t gone. She goes inside a building and into an elevator. Ha-ha! Where does an elevator in the Underworld go? The Under Underworld? Cora goes into a cavern to a weird library where some dude is having a pedicure. Dude wants Regina gone. Each clock tick means a soul has left his domain. I guess he’s the devil? He says Regina is going to regret her decision. Cora says don’t threaten either one of them and she wants what he promised her.

He puts Cora in rags and says she’s a miller’s daughter again and to go tote bags of grain. Cora says he promised to save them and he says she promised not to fail and that’s something to think about for eternity. She takes a wheelbarrow full of sacks and goes. Dude’s hair turns into blue flames.

Next week, Hercules joins the cast and they fight Cerberus, the three-headed dog. I can’t wait!

The Walking Dead

Carol (where’s she been?) is in the pantry picking out ingredients. Carol is in the woods, offing a zombie. Carol is getting dressed in her mom sweater. Carol is taking roasted chestnuts out of the oven and baking cookies. Carol is passing out cookies to the neighbors. Is this a day in the life of Carol?

Carol brings Tobin some cookies. He says they’re pink, and she says beets make them sweet. He says they’re the best beet and acorn cookies he’s ever tasted. I don’t totally trust Carol and wonder if she’s flirting with him or going to poison him.

Rick is back and wants everyone to meet at the church. He tells Carol they’re going to have to fight. He drives off and Carol ponders her remaining cookie container.

Morgan sees Carol and says it’s been a while since they talked. He wonders why she didn’t tell Rick. He says she didn’t want to tell anyone because it’s kind of like she did it too. She says it’s not that way and I have no clue what they’re talking about.

Rick says Maggie hammered out a deal with Hilltop for food and supplies. He says they’re not giving it away though. He tells them about the Saviors and that the Saviors would have found them eventually. He says If they were low on food, it would be the end of them. He says if they fight the Saviors for Hilltop, they can keep Alexandria. He asks if anyone has anything to say. Morgan asks if he’s sure they can beat the Saviors.

Morgan wants to give the Saviors a choice of compromise. Rick says if they talk to them first, they’re sunk. Morgan says life means possibilities. Rick thinks it would be a mistake, and asks who else feels that way. That would be nobody, so Rick says they’ll kill them all. He says not everybody has to be involved, but if they stay behind, they have to accept it.

Carol can’t sleep. She writes some weird stuff in a journal. The number 18 is significant. Carol looks like she has a headache.

Maggie tells Glenn about the deal. She says she has to go with them.

Carol is out having a smoke. She sees Tobin on the steps of his house. They sit together. Tobin says he’s worried about her going to fight the Saviors. He says she can do things that terrify him. She asks how. He says she’s a mom. It’s not the cookies and smiles, but it’s the hard scary stuff that takes strength that makes her a mom to people there. Amen, dude. She’s definitely like a scary mom. She asks if she’s a mom to him, but he says no, she’s something else and kisses her. Lots of nookie this season.

Abe is packing. He tells Rosita he’s leaving after the raid. She asks why and he says it’s just the way shit is. She says he’s not leaving unless he can tell her why. He says she’s not the last woman on earth and she starts to cry. He leaves. Eugene comes by and offers her a cookie, but she slams the door in his face. Poor Eugene. He’s just trying to help.

Andy says he’s been inside the Savior camp. He’s makes a map and explains where things are.

Tara tells Denise she loves her. She’s going with the others and asks if Denise wants to come. Denise says she’s needed in Alexandria, even though she wants to go. She says she’ll tell Tara when she comes back. They kiss and hug.

Andy goes over the layout. Rick and company plan the raid. Rick says they’re going to let them walk in. He says they want Gregory’s head and they’re going to give it to them.

A caravan, headed by the Winnebago, heads toward the Savior camp. They get out. It’s on foot from there. Rick asks Father Gabriel why he still wears his minister duds. Gabriel says that’s who he still is, he thinks, and they also can’t see him in the dark.

Rosita bitches to Carol about Morgan, but says she won’t tell anyone. Dammit, what?

Cool zombies in the woods, like with half-arms and stuff. Glenn and Heath kill them. Heath says he’s been lucky, he hasn’t had to kill any of the living before. Glenn says he’s been lucky too. Glenn asks if Heath has ever seen something he can’t unsee. Heath says yeah. I think all of us have, Glenn. Glenn says him too, but killing someone has to be worse than that and he’s nervous.

Rick tells the group they’re going to scout the place and if everything looks good, they’re going in a few hours before dawn when the guards are tired and everyone is sleeping. If it doesn’t look good, they go back and make a new plan. They roll out at midnight.

Carol asks why Maggie is there. Rick says it’s her choice. Carol says she shouldn’t be there and Rick says okay.

Apparently Jesus had a job with a special effects department. He’s worked with the heads of the zombies that were killed to make them look like Gregory. He gives Rick three to chose from.Andy says the Saviors are scary, but and Negan has nothing on Rick.

Commercial break. Fear 462 gets their first real zombie. Doesn’t everyone know to shoot one in the head though? Oooh! I can’t wait for The Purge: Election Year. I thought the first Purge movie was a little ridiculous, but I loved The Purge: Anarchy.

Andy drives to the Hilltop gate and says it’s done. Someone calls from inside to bring it in. Two guards come out and he pulls a fake Gregory head out of a bag. His hand is bandaged and he says he broke his hand on Gregory’s nose to cover why the head doesn’t look perfect. After the head is thoroughly examined, it passes inspection. The guard says he can take his guy home and he can bring them more stuff next week.

When the guard goes inside, Daryl slashes the other one’s throat. The others hide the body. The guard comes out with the other Hilltopper and he gets killed. The guard, I mean. Rick and company go inside. Rick tells them to find the arsenal and they spread out a little.

Rick sees a sleeping guy and kills him. Glenn and Heath go into a room where a couple of other guys are sleeping. Glenn kills one and freaks a little. Heath hesitates with the second and Glenn takes over. I have the feeling Heath shouldn’t have come on this trip. Glenn sees a bulletin board with Polaroids of dead zombies, which is an oxymoron.

Tara asks if Gabriel is still a priest. He says he is. She says she lied to her girlfriend this morning. Denise caught her covering something up, so Sara said “I love you.” She says she told Denise that she’d done something like this before. I’m not sure if she’s talking about the raid or a same sex relationship. Gabriel asks if she loves Denise and she says yes. He says she knows what she’s fighting for then.

Sasha and Abe try to kill a guy, but he sounds an alarm.

Maggie starts to run toward the camp and Carol stops her saying she should be somewhere else. Maggie says they need their help. Carol says Maggie is staying there. Yeah, better listen to Carol She can be tough in the discipline department.

Sasha tells Jesus to get his people back to Hilltop. He says Rick needs his help, so no.

Inside, chaos is ensuing. Lots of shooting and stabbing and running. I know we’re bound to lose someone. Heath? He and Glenn throw themselves into a room. A room that happens to be the arsenal. They shoot through the door at the people who were chasing them, then cautiously open it. All dead. Except one and Jesus shoots him from behind before he can shoot.

Gabriel sees one of the guys in the woods. He tells him to drop his gun. The guy says Gabriel is just as dead as he is, along with some other cheerful tidings. Gabriel gives him some Bible verses and shoots him, saying “amen.”

Rick and the gang move outside. Heath leaves in the Winnebago.

Back in Alexandria, Morgan is doing some welding.

The rest of the group is getting ready to wrap things up. Michonne wonders which one was Negan. Suddenly, a guy comes hurtling out on a motorcycle. Oops, missed a spot. Daryl knocks him off the bike. They hear a loudspeaker with a female voice telling them to lower their weapons. Oops, missed a lot of spots. Rick says come out and let’s talk. The voice says they’re not coming out, but they will talk. They have Carol and Maggie.

Next week, a deal is struck.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Kandi, who feels about to pop, is seeing Dr. Jackie (from Married to Medicine — reality crossover!) and has a sonogram. All is well. Jackie tells her she’s been a fantastic pregnant woman. She talks about how they can still have sex and even I’m embarrassed because Mama Joyce is in the room. Next, she asks about names. Kandi likes Ace Wells Tucker. Jackie likes it and so do I. Jackie asks Todd if he has a push gift. Mama Joyce says if Kandi doesn’t like it, she’ll take it. Apparently she and Todd are getting along a lot better these days.

Kim leaves the kids with a sitter to go out on the deck and work. She’s having a video conference with her collaborator, Art, who sounds like he does what an agent does plus more. They discuss various projects and she shelves the one with Kenya. Kim says they’re like oil and water and just can’t work together, even though she had a lot of positive things to say about her project. Kim says she takes her work and reputation seriously.

Phaedra sets a beautiful table Her divorce attorney comes by and they have a drink. The divorce has been filed. The lawyer explains about how Apollo will have to be served in prison. They discuss the boys visiting. Phaedra says she doesn’t want her sons to be exposed to the grittiness of the prison and the attorney says Fort Dix is the best possible scenario as prisons go. She asks what Phaedra is going to tell them. Phaedra says very little, because if for some reason they can’t get in to visit, she doesn’t want them to be confused or bummed out. She says the attorney is like a second mom to her.

Kenya and Matt are meeting Aunt Lori at Kenya’s new house, which is coming along beautifully. Kenya says Matt wants a parking spot at the house, but he needs to put a ring on it first. She introduces him to her aunt, and gives her a tour. Kenya had to fire people along the way, and Lori tells Matt to be careful he doesn’t get fired, but he says he’s expecting a promotion. Go, Matt!

When Lori is alone with Kenya, she asks how it’s going with Matt. Kenya says she’s approaching things differently than in the past, taking it a step at a time. Lori says Kenya hasn’t said much about Matt, and she knows Kenya usually dates rich guys. Kenya says her only concern is the age difference. It sounds like Matt is a good guy and understands Kenya. She says she’s scared he’s the right one. Lori says it’s always a crap shoot with love.

Even though Porsha is a fool, she does have cute dogs. Dogs are the great leveler in this world. No matter how much money you have, they still poop on the floor. Her sister comes by and asks how the Jamaica trip was. She says Oliver surprised her and it went well. Lauren says they need to do a photo shoot for her new “Naked Lingerie” line. Porsha’s “Naked Hair” line has taken off, so she’s expanding. They go over the labels for the clothing and phone the creative director about the shoot. Porsha struggles with words that have more than one syllable and the director tells her she has the brains of a paper cup. I concur. (That means I agree, Porsha.)

Cynthia goes to Kim’s office where Kim is going over the commercial they shot in Jamaica. It’s pretty cute and Cynthia is happy. Cynthia feels badly about the Kenya nonsense. She talks to Kim about what was said about Kim’s husband and Kim says the both of them just laughed it off.

Phaedra visits Kandi bearing a gift. She says their relationship has changed, but they always make it work in the end. Kandi says she’s feeling uncomfortable and ready to have the baby. This is Phaedra’s cue to present Kandi with the gift of nipple conditioner.

They talk about the trip to Jamaica and Phaedra says Nene was there. Kandi is a little surprised since usually Nene wants to distance herself. She tells Kandi about how Cynthia said she and Kenya weren’t such great friends and that Sheree and Nene seemed to have mended fences. Kandi says she wouldn’t be so quick to get back into the friendship if she was Sheree. Kandi asks about the kids in regard to Apollo. Phaedra says Aidan understands somewhat. They talk about the boys a little.

It’s time for the lingerie photo shoot. Cynthia is also going to model. Cynthia says she and Porsha’s friendship is a work in progress. They do hair and make-up, and the pictures begin. I have to admit, this is some nice stuff. They spend so much time getting ready, they lose the light outside, so the operation is moved indoors.

Phaedra and the boys fly to Philadelphia and her mom meets them there. She hasn’t told the boys that they’re there to visit Apollo, just in case they can’t get in. She tells her mother that she’ll tell them when they get to the facility. Her mother says they’ll have to think about how to handle things after they see him. Phaedra doesn’t want them to be traumatized when they have to leave.

Matt and Kenya go out for dinner. She says that usually, a guy Matt’s age is a “drive by” for her, but after Jamaica, she thinks he could be what she’s been looking for. She says even though her clock is ticking, she doesn’t want to pressure him, but wants to know that they’re on the same page. She asks Matt if he’s still a party boy or is he ready to settle down. They make cute banter and the food comes. She asks if he wants children and he says within the next year or so. She admits to not being a spring chicken and thinking about freezing eggs already. When the dessert fondue comes, they get cuddly on one side of the table together.

Phaedra tells the boys they’re going on a surprise visit. I can’t stand Phaedra and think Apollo is a lowlife, but these kids are way cute. She says they haven’t seen Apollo in a year and Dylan might not have much recollection of him, having still been in diapers when Apollo went to prison. Apollo must have done all right as a dad though, because we flash back and they obviously love him. Phaedra is concerned what will happen when they see their father. We flash back to everyone’s opinion on the visitation, but Phaedra says hers is the only opinion that counts because they’re not walking in her shoes. As much as I hate saying it, she’s got a point.

In the car, the kids are adorable again. Phaedra says she’s getting more nervous as the time gets closer. Cameras aren’t allowed inside Fort Dix, so we don’t see the visit.

They go straight to the airport afterward. Phaedra says that Apollo was happy to see them, but the boys got antsy because they’re little and have no attention span. She says it was a lot and she’s not sure about a second visit. Phaedra is glad it’s over with. She says when she brought up the divorce, Apollo was against it, but she’s ready to move on.

Next week — the finale — Cynthia gives Peter a massage (my eyes!), Porsha is late (wink, wink), and it’s Christmastime with Kenya playing The Grinch.

I Am Cait

Yay! Cait is back!

Jenny and the gang come by Cait’s house. The girls are taking a road trip. Cait wants to find out more about other transgenders and immerse herself in trans issues. Kendall and Kylie are there and Cait talks about how difficult it was to tell them she was transitioning. Kendall and/or Kylie says they come from a very open-minded family.

They discuss at what point in time they each discovered when they knew what gender they were. They talk about how difficult it is with being called “dad” in a public place. When Cait’s daughters leave, she says she’ll call them from the road.

Candis says there’s been backlash about Cait in the transgender community and Cait needs a reality check. Cait talks about being the only conservative on the bus during an election year, and how it should be interesting. Probably not the word I’d use.

After picking up more people, they’re off to the Grand Canyon. Lots of banter and jokes and suitcases on the bus. It’s a pretty amazing bus. Not quite like the bus in Spiceworld, but it’s definitely glam. At lunchtime, Cait suggests the stop somewhere in the middle of nowhere and take over a restaurant.

Well, it’s not very crowded. I think they might be the only ones there. So much for a Priscilla, Queen of the Desert moment. There is some comedy though when Shandie gets locked behind on the bus until someone comes to her rescue. The lunch is uneventful and drinks are poured on the bus. Jenny says the trip is about more than having fun, and some of Cait’s hardest work is ahead.

Jenny broaches the subject of Cait saying she thinks of herself as heterosexual. She asks if when Cait was a man, if she thought about men as romantic partners. Jenny says her view changed after she transitioned. Cait says no, she hadn’t ever thought about them that way. Shandie asks if Cait dated women, if she’d consider herself a lesbian. Cait says she can’t see herself dating a woman in the future. She says she’s been there, done that, and has three ex-wives. Jenny says now she can have an ex-husband. Ha-ha! Cait says she doesn’t think women would be attracted to her and the girls beg to differ. They talk about attraction and how it differs with people.

They get to the hotel. Cait says now that she’s said what everyone wants to hear, that she’d date a man, maybe they’ll leave her alone for a while. Fat chance. Welcome to the world of women, where no one can let anything go. Some of the girls go out for a meal and discuss Cait’s openness on the bus. Jenny says that Cait often avoids certain topics, but she can’t run away from them now.

Candis and Cait talk about going on a double date. Cait asks if they’re affair would be over then, referring to the tabloid stories that always have them dating one another.

On the bus, Jenny reads an article about a win in a transgender issue case. At lunch, one of the girls — the youngest, at 18 — talks about going to college, and the rest of the women discuss their experiences as transgenders in school. Jenny says a lot of life experiences depend on the community they live in.

Candis suggests talking to Hilary Clinton. Cait says she’s open to hearing both sides and if Hilary becomes President, they’ll need her on their side. Although Cait says Hilary isn’t on anybody’s side but her own. The ladies disagree and ask which Republican candidate would be on the side of transgender issues. Cait says all of them and they scoff at that.

Cait is out and about meeting people. The ladies go to a gift shop and look at the tchotchkes with names on them. I understand when they get excited to see their names. I rarely see anything that has Theresa with an “h’ in it.

They take a helicopter ride over the Grand Canyon. It’s amazing. I saw it from an airplane window once and that was pretty cool too. They go out for dinner. Lots of eating on this trip. I’m in. They discuss when they used to wear women’s clothing as males. Cait talks about going out once, dressed as a woman, and being mistaken for a transgender by a “chaser.” It’s discussed how men who really love a transgender should step up and show that it’s not just a fetish. Cait says everything is complicated by the media for her. More boyfriend talk.

Jenny says in Houston an ordinance protecting the LGBT community has been repealed. I think she spends most of her life on her iPad, checking news items. The tagline for the opposing viewpoint was “No men in women’s bathrooms.” Jenny says the religious right and conservatives are fear-mongering, and it only takes one group to say something like, transgenders are also molesters, and it creates fear.

Jenny asks how Cait feels as a conservative. She says she thinks it’s the way being a transgender is presented to the public. Jenny says it was the Republicans, which begins a debate. Cait says people keep pressuring her to suddenly become a liberal, but her views aren’t going to change. She doesn’t think it’s a question of being conservative or liberal. I agree, there are a-holes in every group and I think most politicians are out for themselves instead of serving the people. And that’s as political as you’ll ever see me get in public. I do agree with Cait though, that it’s unfair to pressure her into thinking in a way she doesn’t think just because she transitioned. I mean, isn’t part of being accepted showing that a particular segment of people is just the same as everyone else?

Cait says Republicans believe in the Constitution which supports equal rights. One of the ladies talks about an ad that perpetuates fear. Candis says there’s never been a Republican who’s stuck their neck out for transgender issues. Cait says the economy is a bigger issue. Cait says she doesn’t think they’re out to get transgenders. Jenny says being a woman is more than hair and make-up. Cait says that conservatives look at it differently and feel the economic issues are more important and if that mess isn’t taken care of, the rest of it won’t matter. Candis worries that if Cait doesn’t change her viewpoint, she’ll find herself ostracized.

Cait says the economy is going to collapse. Zachary says advocating for her trans brothers and sisters is the most important, and she sees the Democrats promoting their issues. Cait says again that they don’t realize how free programs could contribute to an economic downfall.

This season, some of the LGBT community protest Cait; Kris makes an appearance; the girls try on wedding dresses; Kim helps Cait with a new DMV photo; and Cait meets Hilary.

The Real Housewives of Potomac

Please tell me this is the finale. No? Oh, come on.

Katie, Ashley, Robyn and Gizelle meet for lunch. Katie is going to ask them about the being involved with Rost Foundation. They talk about Ashley’s husband wanting to go swimming off the yacht. Ashley says she feels like everyone is just waiting for her to mess up. Well, yeah.

Katie talks about casino night. Katie wants to raise 100K in three weeks and doesn’t even have a venue yet, but she seems to think she can handle it. She says she hasn’t had an event that’s failed yet. Robyn is like if it doesn’t work out, it’s not on us. Katie says if they don’t want to be on the host committee, they don’t have to be and basically fires them ten seconds after hiring them.

Ashley is hosting a weekend at her beach house. She says she feels like she’s the freshman in the group. Her friend tells her to teach them how it’s done.

Katie tells Andrew about the lunch. She says everyone’s egos are too inflated to be supportive. She’s not exactly in the mood for a beach holiday with them, but she’s sucking it up because she likes Ashley.

Karen’s husband wonders if she has bricks in her suitcase and I understand. My father used to ask that about my purse.

Ashley frets about being one of the group. Since Karen is helping her, she’s offered to be her driver. They go in a two-seater, along with Ashley’s dog. Despite their issues, the rest of the girls go with Katie, whose car actually looks like a normal car. Karen asks if Ashley is nervous. Ashley says she wants to be a part of the group and feels like an outsider. Karen says she and her husband built their own life and she once felt that way. She says as Black women, they should embrace each other. The other girls play “Marry, Shag, Kill,” which I think is the stupidest game in the world.

Ashley tells Karen her room plan. Karen gives it the thumbs up. The other girls talk about Katie’s dating life, including Russell Simmons. Katie once blogged about catching him cheating. Gizelle is all tsk-tsk, but in her individual interview, Katie says she’s a fine one to talk, since her husband is all over the blogs. No blogs that I read.

Three hours later — an hour longer than I like to be in a car — they arrive at Ashley’s beach house, which is of course incredible. Ashley has hired a chef and breaks out the drinks. The girls think the cocktails are too sweet and ~~demand~~ ask for champagne. They talk about Ashley’s sex life and I go ♫ LA-LA-LA! ♫ For whatever reason, Ashley says she can tell the women don’t like the food. I have the feeling they probably don’t like much of anything they don’t control themselves.

Ashley shows them their rooms. She says she assigned rooms according to friendships. Robyn finds it all hysterical that she’s staying with Gizelle. It’s obviously a kid’s room and Gizelle is offended. Some girl who I don’t know is rooming with Charrisse, whose name was spelled wrong on the little cards Ashley made, so she claims that’s not her bed.

Gizelle starts Googling hotels and says you don’t put a grown woman in a kiddie bed. It’s a twin bed. Robyn thinks they should get a grip. Gizelle says if Karen had her room, she’d be losing her wig. All the hotels are filled, and Ashley is made to feel like a lowlife. What a bunch of jerks these women are. Is it the finale yet?

Commercial break. Yay! The Shahs of Sunset is back April 10. It’s one of my favorites.

It’s breakfast time and everyone is pitching in except Gizelle. Robyn says she didn’t hear the end of it all night. Worst. Guest. Ever. Ashley says they’re going surfing and those who don’t want to have the option of lounging on the beach. Ashley cops to the fact that had she been up front about the accommodations, some of them might not have come. Charrisse admits that she almost left, but she’s going to stick it out. Oh, gee, congratulations. What I wouldn’t give for a few days at Ashley’s beach house. Even rooming with whoever that extra woman is.

Gizelle says there are sharks in the water, so surfing is dangerous, but I think it’s more a hair and make-up issue. Karen and Charrisse sit it out with her. The girls go out on the water and Ashley’s tattoo is discussed. Ashley thinks everyone is having a good time. Karen thinks there should have been a safer option like a boating expedition. I think Ashley is a real pita, but she’s fun. I’d definitely hang out with her, especially if she’s buying.

Katie tells Charrisse about her lunch and how the girls weren’t supportive of her endeavors. They’re out at the market buying crabs for the grill. In the meantime, Robyn is preparing the grill and Ashley has sweated through her dress because she’s not wearing underwear. This is the most TMI episode ever. The crabs get grilled. Ashley starts to discuss bathroom habits and I agree with Karen that this should be a conversation for another time, not while we’re eating.

Charrisse is all kumbaya and suggests they go around the table, saying something good about one of the others. Gizelle says something about Katie being brilliant, which Katie takes as Gizelle saying she’s stupid, and I’m totally lost on that. In her individual interview though, Gizelle does say that she thinks something is wrong with Katie. Please, is this show over yet?

Still in the throes of bonding, after going inside, Charrisse suggests they say whatever is on their hearts. Gizelle talks about a tea that makes you go to the bathroom and we’re back at that conversation. Robyn asks Charrisse how she’s feeling about divorce. Charrisse tears up and says material things don’t matter. Gizelle says they don’t matter to her either and I wonder if I’ve changed channels.

Karen talks about her mother having early dementia and says she’d give up everything to change that. Okay, that one I would believe. Robyn starts to talk about how a best friend stole money from her and her husband, and starts to cry.

Next week, hopefully we finish that thought; Katie’s behavior at Ashley’s birthday party is discussed (again); Gizelle says Karen is doing well with Ashley, but by the end of the day Karen is done.

Whew!

Mar5

March 4, 2016 — Double GH & Couch Quotes

Posted on March 5, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital — Thursday

Michael asks Morgan how he’s doing. Morgan says how does it look, since he’s tied to a bed, and not in a good way. He feels abandoned, but Michael says Morgan is all his parents can think about.

Carly hears Sonny say he’s going to take Avery to visit Morgan over the monitor. I gotta say, Sonny is looking damn good. He looks like he just came back from a vacation in the Bahamas.

Nina is playing with Georgie’s baby toys. Maxie suggests they go back to the office if Nina can’t concentrate. Maxie says they can’t afford another screw up like with the green issue. Nina says the green issue was a massive success (Truth!) and I wonder what happened with the Real Woman issue.

Franco drops by and says he got a call form an adoption agency.

Elizabeth has good news and bad news for Jake. His bike can’t be fixed, but he can go home today. Elizabeth says they’ll get him a new bike.

Jason and Sam have fallen asleep on the couch together and they look awesome, both dressed in all black. They wake up and start kissing. I’m not in it for the romance, but I do like these two. They cuddle and make some cute talk.

Elizabeth promotes Shriners. Elizabeth says she has a sneaking suspicion there will be a welcome home party. Jake asks if Sam and Franco will be there. He says he likes drawing with Franco. Elizabeth suggests an after school art class. This reminds me of the college art classes I took at Cooper School of Art in Cleveland when I was in high school and how much fun it was.

Nina asks what the adoption people said. Franco says he’ll tell her when she explains why she called them after they’d already decided on waiting. Nina says he’d be an amazing parent. He says the adoption agency isn’t going to entrust the care and feeding of a child to two marginally rehabilitated people. Nina says she’ll talk to them herself and that Franco is hearing what he wants to. Franco says he’s going to the hospital. Nina tells him to send her love to Kiki and says she has to work. Franco says he’ll see her later at home.

Carly called Goodwill to come for the wheelchair, and is going to call the contractor to remove the ramps. Sonny thinks they should revamp everything for Avery. Carly says they don’t know what’s going to happen yet, but another child needs his attention. She wonders what they’re going to do about Morgan.

Michael tells Morgan that Kiki’s surgery was successful, but they still have to wait on a prognosis. Morgan argues about what happened on the roof. Michael tells him he tried to kill himself.

Commercial break. You can make donations for the hospital at Loveshriners.org.

Carly says Morgan was arrested and he stole Sonny’s gun. Sonny says Diane is working on it. Speaking of Diane, here she is. Diane says it’s great to see Sonny on his feet. She says she’s always liked Morgan, despite his wayward ways, although waywardness is nothing new for Sonny’s family members. Carly says she hopes Diane doesn’t say that to the judge. Diane says of course not, but if she can’t work her Miller Kung Fu magic on Paul, Morgan will spend time in prison.

Morgan denies trying to kill himself. Michael says he and Sonny stopped him, and what would have happened if they hadn’t shown up? Morgan says he would have gotten cold and gone back in. Michael says Morgan is not getting well and is just as sick as ever..

Nina talks about a horse who was her only friend growing up. She says she’s never had any female friends or any friends for that matter. Maxie says let’s talk. Nina asks if she knows about baby drama and Maxie says she’ll make coffee.

Franco gets a call from Jake asking if he’s coming to the welcome home party. He says he’s coming home today and Franco says he’ll be there. Jake wants to know if he has to ride a bike again. Franco says he doesn’t have to if he doesn’t want to. Jake says what if he doesn’t remember how and I can’t believe Franco doesn’t take the opportunity to tell him the old adage about never forgetting how to ride a bike. Franco says maybe his parents can give him some coaching.

Danny is up. Make-out interruptus. Jason is going to relieve Elizabeth at the hospital. As he leaves, Elizabeth is coming by in the hallway. She takes note that Jason just came out of Sam’s room — i.e. they spent the night together.

Nina tells Maxie about how Franco thinks no adoption agency will give them a baby. She says isn’t it the world of second chances and points out how blessed she is, saying maybe she’s run out of chances. Maxie says she hasn’t run out yet, so there’s hope for Nina. She’s sure Nina can find a baby, but that’s not her problem, it’s Franco. She says it doesn’t seem like Franco wants a baby.

Here comes Franco riding down the hall of Shriners on a bike. He falls and makes Jake laugh.

Elizabeth says she thought Jason’s room was down the hall. He says he tucked in Danny and ended up crashing there. Although why he feels the need to explain himself to this twit is beyond me. He asks if Jake is okay, and Elizabeth says he’s fine, and he’s going to be able to go home soon.

Morgan asks Michael if he’s a doctor now. Michael says he’s been through the same thing with Sonny, so he knows what he’s seeing. He reminds Morgan of when Sonny was going to shoot himself after Connie’s death. Morgan says he was just talking. Michael tells him he saw Kiki on the roof. Morgan says he’s never going off the meds again. Michael tells him he could be charged with attempted murder. (Of whom? Dixon? Kiki? Himself?)

Carly starts to freak, but Diane tells her she’ll do everything in her considerable power to get Morgan off. She says she’d been remiss if she didn’t present all scenarios. She says Paul might want to hang the blame on Morgan for Kiki getting shot and Dixon holding everyone hostage. She says they might want a scapegoat and nailing a Corinthos is a “big get.”

Jason asks if Sam and Danny want to join him at the hospital. She says she was thinking of going home because she doesn’t want to get in Elizabeth’s way. Jason says they’re grown-ups and everyone is going to have to get used to things. Sam says okay, they’ll come along.

Back at the hospital, Franco says he doesn’t want to break any rules, but the nurse says the only rule is to let kids be kids. Elizabeth returns.

Nina says any child would be lucky to call Franco “daddy,” but he’s just afraid. Maxie says all parents worry they’re not that great. Nina says she thinks they can rise to the challenge. At first she says she can talk Franco into it, but then gets bummed about the adoption issue. Maxie says there are other ways to get a baby.

Michael says the chances of Morgan skating are slim. Morgan says all he’s worried about is Kiki and when she wakes up, he wants to be able to apologize. Michael says he can’t do that in prison. Morgan thinks he has no responsibility. He’s just a kid who didn’t take his meds and is now back on track.

Diane says Carly and Sonny will have to take legal responsibility for Morgan. She says he needs medical treatment, not incarceration. She’s going to request probation and will point out that Paul is a heartless bureaucrat if he doesn’t agree. Of course everything is contingent on Morgan’s agreement. When Diane leaves, Carly says she can’t go along with it.

Morgan says he knows why Michael is worried and that he made a mess of things, but he’s not going to continue being the family embarrassment. He promises to make everyone proud. Diane comes in.

Carly says Diane’s plan isn’t going to work. She’ll be able to keep him out of prison, but the real problem is Morgan’s health. She says they’re not equipped to handle Morgan. He’s wanted to pry into Sonny’s business for years and they were unable to prevent him. Sonny says she’s really talking about him, and she says she’s talking about both of them. She says prison isn’t the only option. They can’t take care of Morgan, so they’ll have to give him to someone who can.

Maxie says Nina can hire a fancy lawyer and set up a private adoption. Nina says last time she hired a lawyer, she ended up in Shadybrook. Maxie says they’re not all like that. Nina says what if the mother changes her mind? Maxie says that could happen no matter what, and why don’t they just try for their own baby? Nina says Britt had told her she couldn’t have children. Maxie points out how Britt lied to everyone, and she wouldn’t trust anything Britt had to say. Maxie tells Nina to get a second opinion. Nina says maybe she and Franco have a family in them yet.

Elizabeth asks where the awesome bike came from and Jake tells her Franco brought it. Elizabeth tells Franco it wouldn’t have occurred to her to bring a bike into the hospital. The nurse takes Jake back to his room to get ready to go home. Elizabeth wonders how Franco knew Jake needed a bike and he tells her about the phone call. He says she seems grumpy for someone whose kid is going home. He wonders why Jason isn’t there and asks what could be more important. When he sees Jason and Sam standing behind him, he says that explains it.

The new issue of Crimson is locked and Maxie has to explain that they don’t want everything green again. She wonders where they got the idea that was a permanent thing.

Jason tells Franco to leave. Elizabeth says he has a friend there, why shoudn’t she? For the first time in forever, I agree with her. Jake and Danny go to the playroom. Elizabeth goes to get her stuff. Jason says it’s her call about the bike. She says Jake loves it, so they’re keeping it.

Diane explains the deal to Morgan. She says it’s eminently doable. She asks if he’s cool with everything and he says probation rather than jail time is definitely cool. When Diane leaves, Morgan tells Michael that he told him everything would be fine.

Sonny asks Carly if she wants a padded cell for Morgan. He says he doesn’t and refuses to have Morgan committed.

Tomorrow, Lulu says her marriage is over (haven’t we been there and done that?), Julian asks Ava about her involvement with the gun running, and Morgan tells Dr. Andre he’s ready to go home and celebrate his freedom.

General Hospital — Friday

Sonny doesn’t want to discuss it, but Carly says they can’t avoid talking about Morgan any longer. She says the only way to save his life is put him in a medical facility and if Sonny can’t see that, he’s in the worst kind of denial.

Dante brings BLTs from Kelly’s to Nathan. The cure-all for everything. Dante says he hasn’t heard from Lulu. He thought they were going to discuss things, but he got the final divorce papers. He assumes she got hers too, and wonders why she hasn’t called.

Ava asks Kiki why she won’t come back. I have a few reasons. She goes on and on about how it’s her fault and she’s going to bring Kiki the moon if she wakes up.

Andre tells Morgan that the surgery was successful, but Kiki hasn’t regained consciousness. Morgan says he’s feeling good and ready to move on. He sounds manic to me. He says Diane will get him out by dinnertime and he can concentrate on Kiki. Andre says he has to deal with his own illness first before helping anyone else.

Sonny says he knows what Morgan is going through. Carly says Sonny has been able to accept treatment, but Morgan isn’t there yet, and isn’t it better to help him now? Sonny says he was never committed and Carly says he isn’t Morgan. Clearly what works for Sonny doesn’t work for Morgan.

Commercial break. Although Sonny has never been one of my favorites, I have deep admiration for Maurice Benard. Check out this article about his bi-polar disorder and how he handled it:

http://www.sheknows.com/entertainment/articles/1114581/general-hospital-maurice-benard-reveals-mental-health-battle-and-suicidal-thoughts

Dante says he thought things might change, but was disappointed that Lulu wanted to stay at Windemere. Nathan tells him if she moves back in too soon it could undermine their progress. Dante says he thought they were making progress, but now he wonders if Lulu is having second thoughts.

Lulu is just getting her mail from Maxie. Maxie says Dante saving Lulu’s life must mean something. Lulu says it does. She said the water was freezing, and then she started to sink and wasn’t cold anymore. She saw all the happy times flash before her and everything she could lose. Maxie asks why she didn’t go home with Dante then. Lulu says she wanted to say yes, but is afraid of history repeating itself. Maxie reminds her about how she didn’t want to marry Dante because of his line of work and asks how she got past that. Lulu says she closed her eyes and took a leap of faith.

Andre tells Morgan that he has a long way to go and isn’t quite himself just yet. He needs to give the medication time to adjust. Andre says the drugs are a means for him to get control of his life, rather than the illness taking control of him. Morgan says he hates the drugs.

Ava runs to Julian, who’s just shown up at the hospital. He says Kiki will come back to them. He tells her maybe he and Alexis can take care of Avery. She says she’s already entrusted Sonny with Avery’s care.

Carly says that Sonny is claustrophobic because his father was abusive, but Morgan grew up differently. Everything was sunshine and roses for him in comparison, so he needs to be treated differently. Sonny refuses to to listen.

Andre asks why Morgan stopped taking the meds. Morgan goes over the ED story. Andre says he should have called, and Andre would have helped. Morgan starts rambling again about Kiki.

Ava says she can’t look after Avery while she’s concentrating on Kiki. She loathes Sonny, but she knows he does love Avery. She says Kiki would be the first person to tell her to leave Avery with Sonny. Julian says it sounds like she’s bargaining with God and trying to rack up points. Ava says he’d do the same thing if it was one of his children. Julian says that’s true. He tells her Dixon was obviously looking for her at the church, and asks what her involvement with the syndicate is.

Carly asks what Sonny is going to do when Morgan leaves home one day and can’t watch him every minute. Sonny gets a call from Diane. She wants to meet them in Morgan’s room.

Nathan tells Dante he doesn’t even know if Lulu got the papers, and he should suck it up and call her. Dante says he’s right, but wants to know why Nathan is trying to get rid of him. Nathan admits he’s been lying to Maxie.

Maxie says Dante and Lulu have been through hell together. She can either hang on to her anger or trust Dante again. She says that Lulu almost died and she needs to open her eyes and heart. Lulu asks what if he does it again. Maxie tells her “what if” will drive you crazy and to take a leap of faith and go home. Lulu goes through the mail and sees the finalized divorce decree. She says her marriage is over.

Andre says he’ll speak to Kiki’s doctor and see if a visit can be arranged, since it might be good for both of them. Probably the only time a visit from Morgan is good is if you’re unconscious. Carly and Sonny show up. Morgan tells them he’s just peachy-keen now. Diane comes in and says Paul wants to shift the blame for Kiki’s shooting and refuses to drop the charges. They have two options — Morgan can be committed to a facility and Paul will consider probation or they can go to trial and Morgan can plead not guilty. Morgan says he wants to go to court.

Lulu says it’s official. She and Dante are divorced. She takes off her rings, saying they don’t mean anything anymore. She’s going to put them away and forget about them. Maxie tells her to tear up the divorce papers instead and have Dante put the rings back on her finger. Lulu says easy for Maxie, since Nathan doesn’t lie to her. Maxie tells her about Nathan lying regarding Claudette. She knows Claudette isn’t a dog, and wonders if she’s still in Nathan’s life. Lulu tells her to take her own advice. Maxie tells Lulu to take her advice. Lulu says, you first.

Ava tells Julian she got involved against her will. She didn’t know what was in the shipments and by the time she did, it was too late. She says when Dixon showed up, she was as blindsided as everyone else. Julian asks what happens now, and she tells him she has full immunity and about the undercover business.

Morgan says he’ll say he was protecting himself. Diane says it’s not that easy. Morgan says they’ll see that he’s getting better and basically starts rambling again. Sonny tells him to stop already.

Dante tells Nathan everyone has a past, so why lie? He says don’t let the same thing happen that happened with him and Lulu . Nathan says if he comes clean with Maxie, Dante has to do the same with Lulu and tell her he doesn’t want the divorce.

Julian tells Ava that Raj and Dixon work with very dangerous people, and could come after her. She wonders how a clean guy like him knows so much about them.

Morgan continues to babble about getting better. Sonny says he will, but it won’t happen at home and he needs professional help. Morgan says Sonny wants to ditch him, but Sonny says they’re not capable of helping. Andre says he doesn’t fully comprehend the gravity of the situation. Diane says they have an excellent case for committing him and she’s sorry, but she won’t defend him. She says they all love him and in good conscience, she can’t argue for his release. Morgan starts to cry and beg.

Morgan keeps apologizing, saying he’s made a mistake and give him another chance. Andre says he’s made arrangements for a good facility already. Morgan starts alternately screaming at everyone and pleading with them. He fires Diane. She says she and Max will keep him in their hearts. Morgan goes crazy, accusing everyone of everything. Carly reminds him that she did a stint in a hospital and came back better than ever and he will too. Andre says everyone should leave now. Sonny and Carly say they love him. Carly says he’ll see that one day. Andre apologizes and Morgan asks to see Kiki before he goes in the “looney bin.“

Julian says he became aware of Dixon and company before Ava ever entered the picture. Julian wonders how Kiki got involved and Ava tells him because of Morgan. Andre comes by and asks Ava for permission for Morgan to see Kiki. Julian is like, hell no, and Morgan says he’s going to a mental hospital and wants to see her first. Julian says every time he sees her, Kiki gets hurt. Ava says Julian is right, but Kiki loves him and maybe he can reach her. She agrees to a visit.

Morgan sits by Kiki’s bed and tells her he never meant for this to happen and he’s sorry.

Maxie comes in with a prescription for Nathan. Nathan says he wants to explain something. Maxie tells him he has the right to remain silent and have a past. She says she trusts and loves him and knows he loves her and that’s all that matters.

Dante sits staring at the papers and takes his ring off. He says it wasn’t supposed to go this way. He starts to call Lulu when there’s a knock at the door. Guess who? And it’s not Valerie. Where is she anyway?

Morgan holds Kiki’s hand and tells her he’s sorry. He says she has a big life ahead with a better boyfriend than him. He says he won’t be there when she wakes up, but he’s not the one she needs. He says somewhere down the line, when they’re both healed, they can see each other again. He says he loves her, always has and always will. He leaves with Andre.

And Kiki opens her eyes, saying “Morgan.”

Sonny and Carly have a drink. Pour me one too. Carly says it’s the hardest thing Sonny’s done. He says it is for Carly too. She says Morgan doesn’t realize how hard it was not to bring him home. Sonny says that he could see the manic building and how nothing was registering. He says it scared him to see how far from reality Morgan was. Carly says he’ll get better. Sonny says it ‘s hard to believe that after what just went on. Carly says Morgan wants to be like Sonny, both despite and because of the danger, and now there will be some distance, and one day he’ll forgive them.

Sonny says what about them and asks if Carly is going to leave him.

On Monday. Lulu talks with Dante, Nicholas wonders why Hayden is suddenly so tight with Tracy, and Tracy gets the MRI results.

People’s Couch Quotes of the Week

She looks like a regular pregnant woman, don’t she? Princella referring to Kim Kardashian.

I love this show. It’s so motivating. It makes me not want to stop at Krispy Kreme on the way home. Sarah referring to The Biggest Loser.

I know they don’t do anything. They just sit around all day, but getting this dressed up for dinner with family is exhausting. Emerson, referring to Downton Abbey.

If this doesn’t get a happy ending, the superfans will burn PBS to the ground. Blake, referring to Downton Abbey.

Mar2

March 1, 2016 — GH, Candace’s Condo, & Beverly Hills

Posted on March 2, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Alexis and Julian are using their gift certificate. Julian suggests using room service for dinner.

Griffin comes to Tracy’s aid and Hayden makes a call to the family.

Ava tells Franco she’s not confident that Paul can get her out of being arrested for arms trafficking.

Jordan tells Paul she still has quesitons for Ava.

Jason pays attention to Sam and plays with Danny in the Shriners waiting room, totally bumming Elizabeth out. She acts all nice when we all know what’s really going on in her head. Danny has brought a toy truck for Jake. Great choice for a kid who just got hit by a car. Elizabeth and Jason go with Danny to give it to him.

Tracy asks what happened. Hayden tells her she had a seizure and Griffin wants her to go to the hospital to get checked out. She says she thinks she’s dehydrated and asks for some water. Griffin helps her to a chair. Griffin says it might not be anything serious, but she should get checked. Dillon comes in and seconds that.

Franco says that if Ava can’t be there for some reason, he’ll look after Kiki as if she was his own, no matter what. He says he thought she was his daughter for a long time, and the feelings didn’t go away.

Paul asks why Jordan needs to discuss Ava’s immunity deal with her. Jordan says she is the police commissioner and wants to be up to speed. Paul tries calling Ava when Jordan leaves, but she doesn’t have her phone with her. Really? With Kiki in the hospital?

Ava says it surprises her to say it, but Franco has been a great surrogate father for Kiki and she’s happy to have him. Franco says that Paul is good at covering his tracks, and he’ll probably cover hers fine as well. Jordan shows up and asks to talk to Ava.

Jake thanks Danny for the toy truck and again seems like a normal kid. The boys go with Jake to the hospital playroom. Elizabeth tells Jason she finds it strange that Sam brought Danny for a visit. Because thinking about someone other than herself is a foreign concept.

Nicholas sees Sam in the waiting room. They talk about Shriners and how Spencer made the bow ties to drum up donations. Where is Spencer? They talk a little about the wedding. Nicholas asks if there’s an update on Hayden.

Tracy keeps denying she had a seizure, but Griffin and Dillon insist she go to the hospital.

Alexis and Julian peruse the room service menu, but toss it aside for more nookie.

In the hospital, Tracy says this is a waste of time. Griffin says he wants to check her PET and CT scans before she leaves. Tracy says she wants the best neurologist. Griffin says what about the best neurosurgeon? She says she wants someone who’s been working at GH for more than five minutes.

Elizabeth says she’s surprised Sam just showed up. Jason says she didn’t, he called her. Elizabeth asks if he wanted to see her. He says he wanted to see both her and Danny. Elizabeth says she didn’t realize how serious things were already, because she is a clueless self-centered idiot.

Sam’s phone rings and it’s Baxter. She says she’s come into some money and wants to invest it. She makes a date to meet with him in Manhattan. Nicholas says he can’t wait to see what she finds out as Jason looks on from a distance.

Franco sits next to Kiki’s hospital bed and talks to her. He pulls out his phone and tells Kiki a cat story he finds on the internet. Deciding the internet is nothing but crap, he wonders what he can say or do to inspire Kiki to come back.

Jordan tells Ava that Paul told her about their arrangement. Since she’s being vague, we know she’s trying to trick Ava into spilling the beans. Ava asks if Paul told her all of the details. At just the right moment, Paul comes in and says Jordan knows all about the immunity deal. Jordan says Ava was about to tell her the intimate details of their relationship. Ava says she realizes how that sounded, but now that Paul is here, he can do that. Jordan wants to talk to Ava alone, but Paul says Ava needs to tend to Kiki. Jordan leaves and Paul tells Ava she’s welcome.

Franco reads what sounds like an online privacy agreement to Kiki. He wants to bore and annoy her so much, she wakes up. He babbles as only Roger Howarth can do, talking about magic wands, Morgan and Griffin. He asks what he can do to bring her back.

Jason joins Sam with Danny. Jason says he knows Nicholas is her family and she doesn’t talk about cases so he’s not going to talk about Nicholas. It turns out he and Sam are staying at the same hotel, so they leave to put Danny to bed. Elizabeth sees them leave together because she just can’t mind her own business.

Paul says thanks to his efforts, Ava won’t have to serve jail time for their arrangement. She says an arrangement he roped her into. She says he got there just before she told Jordan everything, and she would have protected herself at all costs. They talk about Kiki. Ava says she’d give anything for Kiki to wake up.

Jake is having FaceTime with Franco. Franco asks if he can show Jake’s latest picture to Kiki. Franco asks about Elizabeth and tells Jake she loves him and is the best mom ever. Franco talks to Kiki about Jake getting better and says Kiki is going to get better too.

Hayden waits while Dillon gets a soda. Griffin leaves Tracy’s room and Hayden goes in. Tracy says he went to get the rest results. Tracy says she bets Hayden can’t wait to hear that something is wrong with her. Hayden says it’s not like that and Tracy tells her to go away, calling her Rachel. Dillon overhears and is like, what? Griffin comes back and kicks them both out.

Nicholas talks to Elizabeth in the waiting room. Elizabeth says Sam is going to be part of her life forever because they both have sons with Jason.

At the hotel, Jason hugs Sam and says he’s glad she’s okay. He says he wishes he’d been there and she says she does too.

Griffin brings Dr. Mays (the nasty one who Sonny blew off) to Tracy’s room. Back again, Hayden and Dillon thank Griffin for his help. Tracy insists she didn’t have a seizure. The doctor asks if it’s happened before. She says no, but Dillon beings up her spacing out and Hayden chimes in with what she’s observed. Tracy says she was just having senior moments and she asks Dillon and Hayden to leave. Dillon is afraid she’ll lie to the doctor, but they go.

Julian and Alexis make sweet pillow talk. I don’t have a senior moment, but intentionally space out. Julian says getting a second chance with her was the most important thing that’s ever happened to him and he doesn’t want to blow it. Does that mean he’s going to? Blah-blah-blah Julian has changed and Alexis is sooo happy about that. Bluebirds with ribbons in their mouths fly around the happy couple. Bippity boppity boo.

Dillon tells Hayden that Tracy is just scared and taking it out on her. Hayden says she should probably go, but to keep her posted. Dillon says he thinks there’s something seriously wrong with Tracy and that she’s suffering from delusions. Hayden says she might be having seizures, but she’s sharp as a tack. He asks why she would call Hayden “Rachel.”

Paul says he was happy to get Ava off the hook since the thing with Kiki is enough. Ava says its her fault and Paul says she can help by getting out of the business. He says she has a clean slate now, but she brings up the flash-drive that he has. She asks if she can have it.

Franco calls Elizabeth and tells her about the conversation with Jake. He wants to apologize for thinking he understood what she was going through with her son. He says he’s got a better understanding now that Kiki is in the hospital. He says he doesn’t know what to do to get her to wake up. Elizabeth says the only way to get through it is to get through it. Thanks, Yoda.

Sam says she knew in her gut that Jason could stop the bad guys. Jason asks if it’s because of his past. Sam says yes. He asks if that’s why she trusts him, because of his past life. She says yes. Well, that was kind of a dull ending.

Tomorrow, Sonny says he would kill to protect his family (like we didn’t know that already), Tracy tells Dillon what’s wrong with her, and Jason wants to know if Sam trusts the new him.

The Haves and The Have Nots

Candace’s nosy neighbor calls her son the cop. She keeps seeing Quita circle the block.

Quita and her friend Taylor break into the back door of Candace’s place. How come nosy neighbor didn’t see them go back there? They use the GPS to find Quincy’s phone, which stupidly, no one has gotten rid of. Quita sees a way too clean floor. Quita wants to find her brother, but Taylor says they’d better book.

Jim tells Veronica that he’s going to miss her. She says she can’t say the same. He asks if she’s going home to freshen up, and she tells him to get comfortable in the cell since he’s going to be there for a while.

The cops show up at Candace’s place. They handcuff Quita and Taylor. Quita insists she knows Candace and she was invited there. The cops ask for Candace’s phone number, but Quita doesn’t have it.

Jeffrey, who can’t stay away from trouble, comes by and the neighbor points him out. The cops ask him if he knows Quita and Taylor and he says no. He asks Quita if she knows Jeffrey and says he was driving her car. Quita asks Jeffrey where Quincy is. Justin, nosy neighbor’s son and bad cop, wants to talk to Jeffrey in the house. Ugh! I can’t stand this guy and it makes me nervous when he’s around Jeffrey.

Justin asks what’s up and if there’s drug running out of the house. He says something is going on and he knows it. Jeffrey says he doesn’t know what Justin is talking about and he just came to get keys that he left there. Justin wants him to call Candace, but he says he doesn’t know the number by heart. Justin says they’ll wait then. He tells the other cops to take Quita and Taylor in, and says he and Jeffrey are going to wait for Candace.

Justin acts like he’s king of the castle. He asks if there’s some wine around and tells Jeffrey to find him some. Jeffrey asks if Justin is still on duty. He asks Justin to leave and says he’ll have Candace call him. Surprisingly, Justin says okay. Then he gets a little bananas. He tells Jeffrey that Quita said she’s looking for her brother, Jeffrey had her car, there was blood in the car and his mother told him three men came in and only two came out.

He says he knows something’s going on and if he leaves, he’ll be in investigation mode. He asks if that’s what Jeffrey wants and Jeffrey says no. Justin tells him, good choice, and says to pour a drink for himself too, making me nauseous.

Candace meets Landon at a restaurant. Landon says he wants to go back to Atlanta, but Maggie wants him to stick around. Candace asks him if he’s too exhausted to meet a nice, hot young man. He says never, and she says she has someone she wants him to meet and suggests they go to Landon’s room.

After the fastest downing of a bottle of wine ever, Justin asks if there’s more. He walks around, making Jeffrey and I anxious, and then tells Jeffrey to come upstairs with him. It’s hard to know which character to hate the most on this show, but he’s way up there.

Quita sees Veronica at the jail and tells her not to go to her house. Veronica doesn’t know who she is, but Quita says get her out, and she’ll tell Veronica everything.

David, who is driving like a maniac, keeps trying to call Veronica. Veronica is picking up her belongings at the jail and sees that he called. Veronica says her wig is missing. The guard says there’s no wig on the list. I’m not sure what the big deal is about Veronica’s hair, since it’s actually a good look. She could probably go bald and she’d look good.

David calls Jennifer. He tells her not to let Veronica go home. Jennifer tells him off, saying he’ll sleep with that whore and not her, and hangs up. Veronica asks Jennifer if she’s playing games with her belongings. Jennifer acts clueless and Veronica says it’s an $8000 wig and she’ll be suing. There are cameras out front, but Jennifer won’t let Veronica leave by the back way.Veronica says she’s going to the bathroom first and will show Jennifer the beauty of a natural Black girl.

Justin points out what a nice bed Candace has. He asks what she does for a living and Jeffrey says she’s in law school and other than that, Justin will have to asks her. He asks why Jeffrey thinks Quita was looking for her brother here. Justin says he ran them and Quita is bad news, but Jeffrey isn’t. He says the DUI is the only time he’s been in trouble. He shakes Jeffrey’s hand, but then pulls him into a headlock. Jeffrey wrestles with him and ends up the victor. Jeffrey asks if Justin is done playing games and lets him up. At first, Justin acts like it’s all fun, but then he draws his gun and says if Jeffrey ever does that again, he’ll blow his brains out.

Commercial break. If Loving You Is Wrong is back on March 15.

Jeffrey asks Justin why, since he enjoyed it. Justin says he’s crazy and Jeffrey says maybe they both are. Justin says don’t do it again, and Jeffrey says sorry, maybe it was he wine talking.

Holy! Veronica takes a strip off her slip (who still wears those?) and makes a fantastic hair-do out of it. She tells the driver to take her around to the back of the jail, that she’s not leaving yet.

Candace tells Landon how great the guy is that she’s setting him up with. The’re barely in the room when there’s a knock at the door. It’s a humongous guy with dreadlocks. Landon says that’s not his type. Next, Erica and another thug come in. Candace tells Landon to pay attention and slaps him. She wants to know where Landon got the phony information he showed her about Oscar.

Landon tries to act like he’s Candace’s friend, but she’s not having any. Thug #1 starts moving around. Candace tells Landon he’s so pretty, but they can mess him up so his own mother doesn’t recognize him. He says Oscar gave him the link and wanted him to show it to her. Candace is like, and you didn’t think anything was weird about that? Landon says he thought Oscar was into her. Candace asks if he knows where Oscar is and Landon says no. Candace tells Erica she knows Landon is telling the truth because he just peed himself. Although how that’s any indication of truthfulness, I have no idea. Before she leaves, Candace asks Landon if he’d like Thug #1 to stay, since she did promise him a date. Landon doesn’t answer, but I assume it’s a no.

Justin, who is getting tedious, asks Jeffrey if he has any questions. Jeffrey says no, but then asks what Justin’s story is and where he gets off abusing his authority. Justin says that’s not what he’s doing. Jeffrey says yes it is and there’s no telling what he would have done if Jeffrey hadn’t stopped him. Justin says that’s not the case and Jeffrey asks why he’s there then. Justin says he thinks something isn’t right and he’s going to find out what it is. Jeffery says what’s not right is him, touching him sexually, keeping him here, and hiding behind his badge. Justin says he hates queers and Jeffery suggests he wants to be punished because he’s closeted.

Justin asks if Jeffrey’s a therapist and Jeffrey suggests that Justin is a control freak. He says Justin doesn’t hate him, he wants him. Justin says Jeffrey is sick. Jeffrey says Justin is sick because he won’t admit he’s gay. Jeffrey asks who told him it was wrong and asks if he was punished for it. Jeffrey asks Justin to leave, and when he won’t, Jeffrey touches him a place we don’t see and says, the body doesn’t lie. He suggests Justin get some therapy.

Hanna checks on Quincy Jr. in the hospital and says she’ll be there soon. Kathryn comes home. She asks what the hell happened to the house and Hanna says her son. Kathryn asks where he is and Hanna says the last time she saw him, he was driving away in a new car.

Hanna asks where she’s been. Kathryn asks if it can wait. Hanna says it’s waited too long already and to have enough respect for her to tell her the truth. She asks if there’s something she wants to tell Hanna about Wyatt. Kathryn says, so you saw the news, like Hanna is some kind of dimwit, since I’m sure the headlines are all over the place. Hanna says Wyatt told her. Kathryn says she’s sorry. Hanna says she told Kathryn that protecting Wyatt wasn’t going to be good and that he’ll have to pay for what he’s done. She asks if it was all worth it. Kathryn says Hanna is her only friend and she doesn’t want to lose her too. Hanna says she doesn’t lie to her friends and when she asked Kathryn about the girl who was killed, she didn’t say anything, Kathryn says that’s because Hanna knew and saw right through all of them. She says if Hanna hadn’t been there when Amanda died, she doesn’t know what she would have done.

Hanna says she once saw her uncle steal a TV and tells a story about lying that has a tragic ending. She says her uncle died for a TV he didn’t steal and now she makes sure she has the facts straight. Hanna says Kathryn covered for Wyatt who killed the girl and hit her son. She thought the reason Kathryn paid the hospital bills was because she cared. Kathryn asks why she was there for her cancer, and Hanna says it’s because she’s a child of God. Kathryn says Hanna has her there. Hanna says Kathryn still won’t tell her the truth. Kathryn says it’s still under investigation. She says if Hanna quits, what will she do without her? She says she doesn’t care about a clean house, but Hanna is her friend. Hanna says she lied and Kathryn says she chose her son. Hanna says right now, she’s choosing hers. Kathryn says Wyatt is in trouble and needs Hanna. Hanna says she can’t put this out there and not reap it back. She asks for her check. Kathryn won’t give it to her. Hanna says she needs the money. Kathryn says she gets paid on the first and if she’s not there, Kathryn will mail the check. Hanna says don’t do this to her and Kathryn says she has work to do. I’ve always liked Kathryn, but not right now.

Next week. Quita tells Veronica about Quincy, Jeffrey tells Candace that Justin knows something and Kathryn tries to get Hanna to stay.

Takeaway point: The problem with the rich is that they can buy anything they want, but have to beg for what they need.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

What would Kim’s tagline be if she were part of the cast this season? I’m going to stop with that thought, since even I can’t be that mean.

LisaR’s daughter, Amelia, needs her tonsils out. They’re discussing the things she can eat when she gets out of the hospital. The doctor calls and they go over the procedure. He says he can show them the tonsils when they’re done. The girls go eww! but Lisa says she might want to take a look.

Yolanda is hosting a dinner at Wally’s. And by that, I’m assuming she doesn’t mean Walmart. David is still acting like he’s a supportive husband, and they’re going to have a surprise guest entertainer. Yolanda says that even if you’re chronically ill, it’s important to participate in life. She’s having the party at a restaurant rather than her home to lighten the load.

The ponies are running about at LisaV’s house. She says pretty soon they’re going to be in her bedroom and she already has one stallion in the bedroom. Ha-ha! Kyle drops by. She doesn’t really feel like going to Yolanda’s party after their last encounter and Yolanda’s email, but she feels like if she doesn’t show up, she’ll make it worse. Kyle decides she’s just going to apologize and tell Yolanda she was having a bad day. Lisa asks if she can include her with that one.

Yolanda tells David she feels out of touch. He pretends to be concerned. In the limo, Kyle tells LisaV that she and Kim are inching their way toward fixing things.

Even though Erika worked until 2 am, she’s there with bells on. Kathryn tells Erica that Kyle is fired up over Yolanda’s email. Just as she starts to talk about LisaV, Lisa, Kyle and Ken come in. Yolanda and David follow. Kyle takes Yolanda aside and asks if they can talk about the email later. Yolanda asks if she and LisaV can have tea. Lisa says sure, but she wants Yolanda to know she’d never talk smack about her kids.

I love, love, love LisaV’s magenta highlights or extensions or whatever.

Eileen arrives and feels trepidation at seeing LisaV again. LisaR comes in with husband Harry Hamlin, who the girls are excited to meet. Kathryn tells LisaR about her boxing session with Erika and how they talked about LisaV. Kathryn says LisaV can be persuasive, but LisaR disagrees.

LisaV asks Erika about the web comment. Erika says she meant that Lisa can be influential and uses it sometimes. Erika wonders why Kathryn and LisaV would both ask how long she’s known Yolanda back to back. This actually seems like a normal question you would asks someone you just met, so I’m not getting this. LisaV, reading my mind, says almost the same thing, but Erika says it is a normal question, but she thinks Lisa has other motives in asking. She says she feels like LisaV is trying to discredit her friendship with Yolanda and in her individual interview, says that for some reason Lisa doesn’t like her and Yolanda together. She says her gut tells her Lisa is not her friend.

Eileen sent Kim a birthday text and LisaR asks if it would be weird if she did. The general consensus is yes. Lisa wonders how Harry puts up with her.

Erika confronts Kathryn about repeating what she said to LisaV. Erika says she thought they’d spoken in confidence, so thanks a lot. Kathryn says she wasn’t specific in saying it was just between them. Hmm…. I don’t expect my friends to repeat things that I obviously wouldn’t want repeated. I like Kathryn and I think Erika is wrong about LisaV, but Kathryn is also a big mouth. Once again under the Wives guise of honesty.

LisaR says she thinks Eileen is mad at her. Eileen says she’s not mad, but she doesn’t think it’s nice to question Erika when she knows LisaV can be manipulative. LisaR says she really likes LisaV, but feels loyal to Eileen, so she’s torn.

David invites them into another room. Kyle says David’s surprises are always amazing and for all she knows, he brought Elvis back from the dead. Nope. It’s Andrea Bocelli. I think I have a CD of his somewhere that someone gave to me. He sings Ave Maria, it’s fabulous and everyone is enthralled. Kyle takes this as a sign from her mother that she should check on her sister.

LisaR drives her daughter to the hospital. Amelia is concerned about having IVs in her arm and Lisa says she’s probably more worried than Amelia. She calls Harry from the hospital. Lisa says she’s a worrywart by heart and will create a problem if there isn’t one. My father always said that when there was nothing to worry about, my grandfather would worry about that, so I get this. She says the wait is excruciating. Amelia’s doctor comes out to tell her everything went fine. In today’s hospital here’s-your-hat-what’s-your-hurry fashion, Amelia will be sprung shortly.

Kyle is cooking with her daughter Portia. Even though she’s only 7, Kyle tells Portia that some children live at home until they’re married. Wise at a young age, Portia responds with, “Lovely.” Mauricio comes home and one of the dogs steals a baked potato from the table. Kyle says she can’t count the times Bambi has stolen food.

Kyle has been dabbling in ancestry and she would love to go to Ireland. She also says that she met with Kim and Kim seemed like her old self. I’m not sure how these two things connect. Either because they’re family oriented or she’s thinking of going to Ireland with Kim.We see Bambi swiping something else from the kitchen.

Yolanda, Kathryn and Erika meet in the park for a take-out picnic. They talk about Bocelli. Eileen says the evening was a little weird, and tells them how Kathryn had told everyone what Erika said. Yolanda says that wasn’t cool and Kathryn possibly burned some bridges.

Mohammed comes by LisaV’s massive property. Giggy! He has a little house for the ponies and jokes that it‘s for Ken. Lisa thinks maybe her friendship with Mohammed colors her relationship with Yolanda, and between them, her loyalties would lie with Mohammed.

Eileen says she’s had issues with LisaV lately and feels everyone acts like the issues are resolved, but they just sit there. Yolanda says on a personal level, she and Lisa have never gotten intimate, but that’s okay. Eileen says she likes Lisa, but they’re not the friends she thought they would be. She also thinks LisaR’s reaction to the LisaV smack talk was over the top. What I think is that everyone always says they want to move on, but then they have a hard time letting go.

Kathryn is meeting her sisters for lunch. She has three sisters and says all of them were unplanned. Their mother is in the early stages of dementia and they discuss that.

Kim visits Kyle. Kyle says it’s easy for Kim to pretend things didn’t happen, but not so much for her. They talk about Kim’s birthday. In her individual interview, Kim says she doesn’t want to discard what happened, but wants to have a fresh conversation. Kyle asks why Brandi has to send out a picture to social media every time she and Kim are together. Because she’s a self-centered, thoughtless drunk, that’s why.

Kim says bringing up past things can be detrimental. We see a flashback of the infamous limo scene where Kyle first calls Kim an alcoholic, which Bravo will never, ever let us forget. Kim says if it’s going to affect heir lives, they need to talk about it, but not in public and not at the top of their lungs. Kim says not talking to Kyle was hard.

Erika tells everyone all about how LisaV feels about herself, even though she doesn’t really know her. To be honest, and even though she can do no wrong, I do think Lisa has a hard time apologizing. But I also think this stuff is extremely petty and considering what a good friend she is otherwise, I’d let it slide.

Kyle says she feels like Kim hates her. Kim says she loves her with all her heart, but she does have feelings of resentment. Kyle says every time there’s an altercation, the silence between them gets longer. In her individual interview, Kyle says as much as she hates to say it, a lot depends on Kim’s sobriety.

Next week, the ladies take on Habitat for Humanity, LisaV confronts Erika again about the web comments, and Erika’s husband orders Kathryn to leave (or at least that’s the impression we get from the preview).

Mar1

February 29, 2016 — GH & the Rules of Vanderpump

Posted on March 1, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Nathan is drifting off to sleep when Maxie tells him she loves him. He says, “I love you too, Claudette,” prompting Maxie to asks who the blip that is, but he’s already asleep.

At the MetroCourt, Alexis goes over the events of the wedding with Julian. She adds that the good of being married to him outweighs the bad stuff. Sam comes along to check up on them.

Tracy is reading about Paul’s arms bust on her tablet. Hayden comes along and asks how she’s doing. Tracy says apparently she misjudged someone, meaning Paul. Hayden goes over Tracy’s romantic history and how she ignored ELQ for a long time. Hayden wonders why she’s so interested in the company now.

The doctor at Shriners tells Jason and Elizabeth that Jake is out of surgery. The surgery was successful and the doctor goes over what they did, and also explains some things about Shriners. They’re going to keep Jake overnight, but he should be able to do his therapy in Port Charles.

Alexis tells Sam they have a lot to be grateful for and Julian adds that it could have been worse. Sam asks about Kiki and gives Alexis and Julian a gift certificate for dinner and a night at the hotel. Because no one can ever spend enough time there.

Elizabeth and Jason drum up contributions for Shriners. The boys come in with a surprise for Jake.

Lucas tells Anna that Nathan is going to be okay. She asks about Kiki and he introduces her to Griffin. Anna asks if they’ve met before, but he doesn’t think so. He says Kiki is critical but stable and the prognosis is wait and see. He keeps looking at her in a strange way.

Felicia comes running in. She talks with Anna while Griffin walks away looking perplexed.

Nathan is awake. Maxie tells him that he was talking in his sleep. She asks who Claudette is.

Felicia muses over them thinking the bad guy, Paul, is now the good guy. Anna says that might not necessarily be the case.

Nathan says Claudette was his dog when he was a kid. He asks Maxie if she’s jealous and she says no, it’s sweet, but kind of odd. Nathan says it’s probably the pain killers. She also thinks Claudette is a weird name for a dog, but he says not a French poodle. I don’t think it’s weird for any dog. I like when dogs have human names. Felicia drops by. Actually, I have a dog named Felicia. She’s not named after this Felicia, but after Felicia from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. See, Maxie? Not all that weird.

Anna goes to the chapel and Andre comes in.

Nicholas is with the boys and they tell Elizabeth the surprise is from Spencer. Nicholas explains that Spencer had wanted to open a lemonade stand, but realized it’s not very profitable in the wintertime. So instead he manufactured and sold the bow ties the boys have on and cleaned up, along with Nicholas adding a few zeros. They talk about Shriners again and Elizabeth takes the boys to visit Jake.

Jason tells Nicholas thanks, but it isn’t going to change anything regarding the lawsuit.

Alexis asks if Jason knows what happened. Sam says she doesn’t think so, because he’s been wrapped up with Jake’s surgery.

Hayden asks why Tracy is interested in running ELQ. Tracy says perhaps her family legacy has something to do with it. Hayden says Tracy left Port Charles for years and tried to shake her family. Tracy says her father was a samurai at business and could make the person who invented tough love cry. Hayden says the apple didn’t fall far from the tree. Tracy says her father was still her father, and is the reason she’s so involved, but Hayden wouldn’t understand considering how her father is. Hayden says Tracy doesn’t know squat about it and tells her to be careful; her next words could determine her future.

Hayden says Tracy might have read about Hayden’s family, but she doesn’t know any more than the reporters did. She said her father was no saint, but there was more to him than his worst day. Tracy apologizes, knowing what people thought of her own father. They agree their relationships with their fathers were complex and complicated. Tracy says they’re here to talk about the other man in Hayden’s life — Nicholas.

Jason tells Nicholas not to get comfortable with ELQ being his. Elizabeth comes in and reminds them why they’re at the hospital. Jason goes in to visit Jake.

Felicia tells Nathan better to go after the bad guys when you’re armed. Maxie says it’s her fault for telling him to take off his gun because it ruined the line of his tux. Felicia suggests they talk to Lucas and she and Maxie leave.

Andre sits with Anna. She says she has to reevaluate what she knows about Paul now. She says she hasn’t processed the turn of events yet and is going to concentrate on finding Carrrlos. When that’s done, she’ll get justice for Duke. Andre asks her what happens after that, and she says she goes to prison.

Anna says she should pay for the crime of shooting Carrrlos. Andre asks why. Anna says it must be difficult for him, Anna being his patient and him dating Jordan. He says he’s been doing his job for a while and part of it is keeping secrets. He asks what bringing Duke to justice means for her and will she be able to move on once it’s done.

Jason comes in to Jake’s room where the boys are signing his cast. They talk about playing baseball and Jake seems like a normal kid for once.

Elizabeth thanks Nicholas. He says he’s always there for her and her sons and she can stay at Windemere for as long as she likes. Elizabeth says she kind of hates his wife, and right now she wants to focus on Jake and getting him to open up about his years with Helena, which no one has really addressed. Yeah, perhaps they should do that before he has children of his own and locks them in the basement.

Elizabeth asks about the wedding. Nicholas tells the story and Jake walks in. He asks about Sam. Nicholas says she’s fine, but Jason wants to call her.

And he does. Sam confirms she’s fine and will fill him in later. He says Jake is doing well, and asks if Danny could come for a visit.

Felicia says she just wanted to get Maxie alone and asks how Nathan is. Maxie tells her about Claudette the poodle. Maxie says him having a French poodle doesn’t make sense. Really? We just got done with an episode where he’d explained that he grew up privileged and has two tuxedos. Maxie tells Felicia about finding the glove in his jacket pocket. Felicia says Nathan loves her and never gave her a reason not to trust him. Maxie says Dante never gave Lulu a reason not to trust him either.

Hayden tells Tracy that Nicholas took to the boys to see Jake and maybe he’s not as ruthless as they thought. As Julian and Alexis are leaving, Tracy says there goes the happy couple, and that she bets that’s a wedding Hayden wishes she hadn’t gone to. Hayden says it was a great wedding until it wasn’t.

Anna says she doesn’t know where her life is going at this point. Andre wonders how her family would feel if she went to prison. She says how often does she see them anyway? Andre asks if she wants to go to jail. She says at this point in her life she has no reason to be free. Andre tells her she needs to get some sleep. I think she needs some antidepressants. She tells him he’s right and he should charge her. He says he’ll listen to her problems and feelings, but won’t tolerate her running herself down. He tells her everyone is allowed to be weak and have regrets. He says she’s feeling her humanity and he hates to break it to her, but she is human.

Nathan tells Maxie he doesn’t want her to doubt his love. Felicia comes in with a stuffed poodle.

Julian and Alexis introduce themselves to Griffin and ask how Kiki is. He says she’s holding her own. He says she has a long road ahead and they don’t know the repercussions of her injuries yet.

Tracy says the gunfire must have brought back Hayden’s getting shot. Tracy says it must have been traumatic. Hayden wonders if Tracy isn’t as ruthless as she seems. Tracy says she has a reputation to uphold, but starts to space out again, making me wonder what the blip is happening with her.

Ava is in with Kiki, who is only allowed on visitor at a time. Alexis suggests she and Julian use the gift certificate. Like moths to a flame, they head for the MetroCourt.

Felicia asks if Nathan is going to name the poodle Claudette Junior? I’m not sure if she just thinks the whole thing is funny or she’s trying to accuse him of something. Felicia suggests they look into getting Nathan released. When they’re gone, Nathan tells the poodle not to look at him that way

Nicholas goes in to visit Jake and Sam shows up at Shriners. Jake wants to stay at Windemere, so that settles that.

Andre tells Anna to call him if she needs him. He says a lot of people care about her and it would be a shame if they were forced to be without her.

Tracy starts to have a seizure and Hayden calls for help

Tomorrow, Jordan wants to talk to Hayden, Elizabeth realizes how serious Jason and Sam are (sigh — how dim is this woman?) and Hayden yells for someone to call 911.

Vanderpump Rules

Hahahahaha! James got the boot from PUMP. I know it was last week, but I just had to laugh again.

Scheana says the best day to be at SUR is payday. IMO, that’s the best day to be at any job. Katie tells Scheana about being upset about Ariana faking having fun with them. For whatever reason, Schwartz was unsupportive, so Katie sent him many drunk texts saying she’s sorry she ever met him. Right now, he’s not talking to her.

Katie says Ariana is being icy and condescending. Lisa comes in and asks if the girls are working tonight. They aren’t, but they stick around and tell Lisa about the Palm Springs trip. Lisa is concerned that Katie won’t stand her ground with Stassi, but I think Katie has that down at this point. She and Scheana haven’t told anyone that they’re going to show up, since Katie doesn’t want Stassi to have some speech prepared.

Jax and Schwartz are helping Peter babysit his girlfriend’s son. They start with having a drink. Schwartz talks about Katie’s rage texts. He says he knows it’s the alcohol, but it still hurts. He says Katie is the Shakespeare of rage texting and it‘s brutal poetry, which is kind of poetic itself.

Sarah and her son, Liam, arrive at Peter’s place. Liam immediately wants to know who is going to play the princess. Schwartz gets the crown. Sarah gives them a list of rules, but Schwartz says all bets are off once she leaves. He thinks babysitting is awesome because you get to be a kid again. Obviously he’s never been a full time babysitter. Although it is fun playing with the new Christmas toys.

Rachel, Kristen and Stassi arrive at the Palm Springs house. Kristen says it belongs to Rachel’s parents, and since they’re away, the girls are going to act like teenagers whose parents are gone. How this is different from the way any of them normally act, I’m not sure. Stassi says she used to be the one who decided who was going on a trip or not, and now she’s the one people stay home to avoid. I know someone like that IRL and I’m surprised Stassi actually gets it.

No surprise, they start drinking immediately. Palm trees, old people and unbearable desert heat is how Stassi describes it. James texts Kristen and the other two tell her to block him. Stassi says Kristen has gone beyond bad boys and on to losers.

Lala asks James what’s up with the date he brought to the beach. Since she popped in from nowhere, it was obvious it was to make Kristen jealous.James says he didn’t want to be the only one showing up alone. Lala suggests he invite Kristen to dinner and actually talk to her instead of acting like he’s 12. Good luck with that.

Tom says he has a lot on his plate. Jax suggests he’s separating himself from everyone. Tom says he’s been a good friend and it seems like Jax is talking a lot of smack about him. Tom says Jax exaggerates things, and wants to make Tom look bad, because he gets jealous when his friends get ahead and he’s out of the limelight. Jax thinks Ariana is causing Tom to be more negative. Tom tells him that he’s low man on the friend totem pole at this point.

Kristen rehashes the beach. Stassi says it seems like every week that she’s missing big events in Katie’s life. She says, miss enough of them, and you realize you’re no longer a friend. Well, yeah, you didn’t want to be her friend. That’s how this started, remember?

Katie and Scheana ring the bell. Katie says it’s Stassi’s chance to admit everything she’s done wrong and if she doesn’t, it’s a problem. Everyone is shocked to see them and I laugh at the expression on Stassi’s face. She looks constipated and pained.

Katie says they were invited, but she’s here to talk to “this one,” meaning Stassi. Stassi starts crying immediately, since she knows she’s doomed, and Katie says let’s talk in the other room. Scheana says they’ve booked a hotel room just in case.

Katie says she did nothing to warrant what Stassi did. Stassi says Katie going to Scheana’s party when she thought Scheana was involved with the sex tape debacle was hurtful. Katie says everything isn’t always about Stassi and that she‘d put her life on hold for her, and that’s not how friendship works. Stassi says she gets that now and realizes how many selfish decisions she made.

Katie says friends aren’t disposable. She says she was an amazing friend and it was shameful that Stassi could never admit when she was wrong and ultimately dumped her as a friend. Stassi says when she felt hurt, she would cut people off rather than let them hurt her again. Katie tells her it’s too little too late. Stassi starts crying again and Katie says she doesn’t have time to go through something like that again and she’d be a fool if she did.

Jax and Tom are bartending. Schwartz comes in for a beer and Lisa asks what’s up. He tells her about the Katie/Ariana disagreement and the texts that resulted. Lisa says sometimes you just have to listen. She thinks Katie gets frustrated because she feels Schwartz isn’t on her side. She says with Ken, even when she’s wrong, she’s right with him. She tells Schwartz, better to be wrong and happy than right and sleeping on the couch. I think this is a problem in general that most guys don’t grasp and Lisa is lucky that Ken gets it.

Jax is worried that everyone will become friends with Stassi again and ditch him. Because everything is always about him. He says he’d like to be a fly on the wall in Palm Springs. I’d like him to be a fly on the wall so I can swat him.

Stassi says she missed out on a lot and she knows what a good friend Katie was. She says she’s sorry for everything. Katie thanks her for apologizing. She says she’s waited a long time for it. In her individual interview, she says she doesn’t think she’s ever heard Stassi admit she’s wrong about anything, and that taking responsibility goes a long way with her. Me too. She tells Stassi she’s welcome to the engagement party. They hug. Hopefully, Stassi is being truthful and Katie isn’t getting sucked into anything. Although I don’t think she’d let that happen again.

Katie and Stassi rejoin the group. Scheana says whatever Katie wants to do is cool, although the room is paid for. Stassi says she ordered some male strippers. Kristen is all happy because it’s like the old days. Scheana calls the hotel to tell them they’re not coming.

First thing in the morning, Kristen asks if Scheana would like a cocktail. She says no until Kristen starts talking about Ariana and what she said about Rachel. Scheana says that Ariana knows what she and Shay have been going through, but acts like a bitch to her and not Shay.

Ariana tells Lala that guys who want to look at your boobs are the lousiest tippers. Interesting. She tells Lisa that she’s glad to be working this weekend and have a break from the other girls. She doesn’t want a complicated dynamic, but Lisa says sometimes you have to deal with that when you have friends.

Scheana tells Katie that she feels badly because Katie doesn’t look at her like a best friend anymore. Lisa says that she saw the strength of Arina and Scheana’s friendship and that it’s a shame to let it go. She suggests maybe Ariana needs to put more effort into her friendships, and she should talk to Scheana. Ariana says Scheana is like a different person.

Katie compares what’s going on with Scheana and Ariana to her and Stassi. She talks about her texts to Schwartz. She says the weekend has been all about forgiveness, but she’s not sure where she stands with him right now.

What it looks like to me is that this group just doesn’t get that sometimes dynamics change among friends, especially when one of them has things to do other than drink and hang out. Again I wonder if this is a west coast thing. I left home at 18 and don’t remember any of my friends acting this ridiculous when I was younger. Although maybe that’s because we all actually had lives.

Katie says it seems surreal, since she didn’t think she and Stassi would be friends again. Stassi thanks her for her forgiveness. She also says she’s aware things take time and doesn’t want to overstep her bounds. Katie says she does still have reservations and she’s going to be cautious. She wants them both to be real and get to know each other again. Stassi says Katie can ask her anything.

Kristen says she’s as desperate as Stassi and she’d like to delete the past two years and have everyone be friends again. Stassi says the weekend was pretty intense.

James meets his mom, Jacquie, at a restaurant. He tells her about being fired from PUMP and how he went into work drunk. He says he realizes he let both her and Lisa down. He says Kristen came in and things escalated. Jacquie asks if Kristen hadn’t been there, would James have gotten fired? James says yes, it would have happened eventually and that it wasn’t Kristen’s fault. Jacquie says she never sees Kristen without a drink in her hand, and James says she’s a fine one to talk. Jacquie is like, hold on there, don’t be comparing your mother to Kristen. In his individual interview, James says that his mom and Kristen are very much alike.

He tells Jacquie about inviting Kristen to dinner. He says he has a plan to quit alcohol, get ripped in a different way at the gym, get his job back and be a success. A sure fire way to go back to drinking. Over-extend yourself.

Katie comes home. Schwartz asks if he smells Stassi. Ha-ha! Katie tells him about Stassi crying and says she also had time to think about her texts to him. He asks if he can still pawn the ring. Schwartz is a real comedian tonight. Schwartz wonders if there isn’t a nugget of truth though, and maybe she has some doubts. Katie wants him to have her back. She says she felt unheard and misunderstood. She says she felt that he was taking someone else’s side. He says he does’t look at it that way, but he gets that if she feels hurt, he needs to be supportive.

Next week sounds like a doozie. James tells Kristen she broke his heart; Tom films his video; Jax isn’t ready for marriage, but Brittany is; Katie wants the engagement party at SUR, but Lisa doesn’t want Stassi there; and Jax’s possible jail sentence still hangs over his head. Whew!

Feb28

February 26, 2016 — GH, GH & a New Couch

Posted on February 28, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

Usually, I post this on Friday, but it was postponed due to need for sleep.

General Hospital — Thursday

Morgan is now restrained in a hospital bed. Michael comes in and tells him it’s just a precaution. Morgan asks how Kiki is and Michael tells him no one knows yet.

Griffin tells Ava he’ll be doing the surgery. Ava asks if Kiki will recover, and Griffin says they’ll do everything they can.

Hayden is at the pier and runs into Curtis.

Jason and Monica are at Shiners Hospital visiting Jake. More advertising for the hospital. Monica says she admires Jake putting away his differences with Elizabeth for Jake’s sake. She says if it weren’t for Jake and Jason, she’d never talk to Elizabeth again. Elizabeth the sneak, who has come in behind them, says she doesn’t blame her.

Laura asks Dante how Lulu is and he says she should make a full recovery. Laura thanks him for saving Lulu’s life. He says he loves Lulu with everything in him, and Lulu and their son is all that matters to him. Lulu hears him.

Monica starts to apologize, but Elizabeth stops her. She thanks Monica for her kindness to Jake. Elizabeth says the hospital set her up in Jake’s room and they’re still evaluating the tests, after which, they’ll come up with a treatment plan.

Michael says Kiki is stabilized. Not so Morgan. He insists on seeing her and Michael says there’s nothing he can do. He asks if Michael knew Sonny could walk the whole time.

Griffin says they have to remove the bullet fragments. Ava asks if Kiki is going to be paralyzed, but it’s too early to tell.

Lulu asks about Rocco and Laura says he’s fine at Windemere. She leaves and Lulu tells Dante how scared she was. He says it’s going to be okay and she says, is it?

Hayden tells Curtis she was just getting air. Curtis says, at a crime scene? She says she just happened to come upon it while she was walking. Curtis says he likes her and she’s been one of his favorite clients. She says their business is concluded now, but they continue to talk.

Nicholas tells Laura things could have been a lot worse and Hayden is fine just in case she was wondering. He says he thinks the melee at the wedding triggered memories of what happened to her last spring. Laura asks if that’s a polite euphemism, and what happened to Hayden was that Nicholas tried to have her killed.

Dante asks Lulu why Raj threw her in the water. She says he said something about a shipment and had seen a problem on the pier. He didn’t want any witnesses, and pushed her in.

Ava tells Franco that Paul blackmailed her into using her gallery as a front for the arms shipment. She says he told her he had a taped confession and threatened to use it against her. Franco asks if she knew Paul was working undercover. She says it doesn’t matter. She let herself get roped into something that hurt Kiki.

Morgan talks about how he wanted to prove himself to Sonny. Michael says he should have called someone. Morgan says he had the thugs where he wanted them and Kiki came in the middle.

Nicholas says all he can do now is make it right with Hayden. Laura asks if that’s why he married her.

Curtis says it’s understandable that Hayden’s memories about being shot should be stirred up. He suggests she talk to her husband

Jason tells Monica that Elizabeth has taken responsibility for her actions and he wants to put it past them and would like her to do the same. Elizabeth apologizes to Monica. She accepts and says she wants to move on for Jake. Elizabeth tells Jason that Jake failed to grasp that they weren’t together anymore because she didn’t want to see it. The same way she didn’t want to see that Jake was really behind the break-ins at the house.

Dante asks Lulu if she can describe Raj. She says yes, and he says he’ll bring in a sketch artist.

Hayden asks how Curtis knew she was married, and he says he couldn’t help but notice the huge rock on her finger. She tells him she married Nicholas, but she doesn’t want to discuss the shooting with him because it makes her vulnerable. Curtis asks if he wanted her dead.

Laura asks what if Hayden finds out the truth? Nicholas says for all she knows, she just got caught in the crossfire of Sean’s gun. Laura wonders why she would marry him.

Jason says he knew Jake was having a hard time, but didn’t know what it was about. Elizabeth says Jake was picking up on her anger and disappointment. She says she was so busy rationalizing and justifying her actions, she missed what was going on with him. Jason says the best they can do now is stand by Jake while he heals. Elizabeth suggests they need some healing of their own. Jason says they should try to be the friends they were before anybody knew who he really was.

Morgan acts normal until Michael leaves. Then he tries to get out of the restraints. He presses the button for the nurse and tells her he needs to relieve himself. She says she’ll get a urinal bottle. He says the idea of her holding a bottle is traumatizing and it would make things worse for him. He asks if he can just use the restroom real quick. The nurse says he knows the protocol, but finally gives in because she’s a total pushover who doesn’t know her job.

Ava talks about seeing Kiki hooked up to the machines. She compares Kiki to Connie, and how Ava took her life like it was nothing. She says it isn’t Morgan’s fault Kiki was shot, it’s hers. She thinks Kiki is paying for what she’s done wrong, and her punishment is watching Kiki hover between life and death.

Morgan suddenly appears and Ava gets loud. Franco tells him being sorry doesn’t help and to go back to his room. He disappears as quickly as he came and a doctor comes out with a Kiki update.

Elizabeth says blah blah blah, and Jason says he meant it when he said let’s put things behind them. Probably because he wants her to stop talking.

Hayden asks why she would marry someone who tried to have her killed. Curtis says it beats him and wonders if being a princess is that important. Hayden says that’s not it. Curtis says if Nicholas finds out she knows, he could finish the job. She says she has proof the shot didn’t come from Shawn’s gun and she might need it as leverage in the future. Curtis asks her please not to say she’s in love with Nicholas.

Laura is concerned that Hayden is going to take advantage of Nicholas. Nicholas tells Laura that as much as he loves Hayden, he’ll protect himself and Spencer at the first sign of any trouble.

Nicholas visits Lulu. He says given everything that’s happened, does she think that she and Dante can tear up the divorce papers and start over.

The doctor says removing the bullet fragments is more complicated than anticipated and that Griffin will let them know the prognosis later.

Commercial break. Mostly for Shriners Hospitals. If you’d like to donate, here are the links: Lovetotherescue.org and Loveshriners.org

Elizabeth said owning up to things freed her. She asks Jason what’s next. He says doing his best to be a good father to Jake and Danny. He says he loves the other kids too and would like to be involved in their lives. He also says he has a lot of money so he won’t have to shovel snow anymore. He says he knows a lot more than he did last year at this time, so that’s a positive.

Curtis says great, Hayden’s giving her heart to the man who put her in a coma. She says it isn’t like that anymore. Curtis says to keep his number just in case she needs a bodyguard, and she should turn in her prince before he turns on her. He says he doesn’t want to read about her in the newspaper.

Lulu says just because Dante rescued her, doesn’t mean their troubles disappeared. Nicholas says she and Rocco are welcome to stay at Windemere for as long as they like, but asks if she’d try to welcome Hayden into the family.

No surprise, Morgan has disappeared. Dante asks Michael if he needs help, but Michael wants to look for Morgan himself, since Morgan is so easily jazzed. And why he’s not under sedation, I have no clue. Michael goes to look for him and the doctor tells Dante that Lulu is going to be released.

Ava goes down Memory Lane about Kiki as a toddler. She says Kiki has always been too fearless and wonders why she’d throw her life away for Morgan. I wonder that too.

Monica says Jake is still sleeping, but the doctor’s would like to discuss a treatment plan with Elizabeth and Jason. Elizabeth tells Monica that she and Jake talked, and they’ve decided their relationship is to be good parents to Jake. Monica says without her, Jason might not have survived the accident.

Hayden shows up at the hospital. She and Nicholas hug.

Dante tells Lulu she’s being released. She can’t wait to see Rocco and says she was afraid she’d never see him again. Dante says they have a lot to t alk about and work through, but asks if she and Rocco would like to come home with him. She says sorry, but she’d be more comfortable at Windemere for now.

Michael fills Ava and Franco in on what happened at the pier. Ava says she knew Kiki must have been protecting Morgan. Michael asks if they’ve seen Morgan. Franco says he showed up, but he thinks Morgan went back to his room. Michael says if they need any help, o let him know. Franco says keeping Morgan away from Kiki is the only help they need.

Ava says she prayed all night, begging for Kiki’s life and wonders why God would listen to her. Franco says because she was praying for something other than herself. They pray together and I alost start crying. Griffin approaches them.

Idiot Morgan goes to the roof of the hospital. How come no one is looking for him, since he’s a suicide risk? It’s been like a half hour. He teeters on the edge of the roof.

Tomorrow, Paul tells Jordan she can’t arrest Ava, Andre calls out the idiot nurse who let Morgan loose, and Morgan is found.

General Hospital — Friday

Obrecht is singing a lullaby in German to Nathan. Nina is like, that’s nice, but unnecessary, especially since Nathan doesn’t know German.

Paul holds a press conference, telling the people how the arms deal was foiled and Port Charles is safer now.

Andre tells Sonny that Morgan has been admitted under his care. He says Morgan is in restraints. Fat lot of good that did. Sonny balks at that and Andre says it beats the alternative — jail. Carly says Morgan isn’t understanding that he’s a danger to himself and others.

Morgan teeters at the edge of the roof, babbling about Kiki.

Griffin asks to speak to Ava in private. She says she just wants information as to whether Kiki is okay or not.

Morgan sees Kiki on the roof. I assume this is a delusion, since she’s still pretty bad off.

Nathan tries to get out of bed. Obrecht says they’ll put a security guy outside if necessary. Nina says she’ll pay for it and she and Obrecht leave.

Jordan says Paul fed the reporters a bunch of bull to make himself look good. She says he didn’t bother to notify any of the local authorities of his plans to bust the gun ring. He says he is a local authority and the PCPD wasn’t exactly shiny clean before he got there. Jordan brings up both Nathan and Kiki. She says he also needs to finish the job.

Paul is like, what? and Jordan says what about the local contact, since the crates were labeled Jerome Gallery.

Morgan tells “Kiki” how sorry he is. He realizes she’s bleeding and all of a sudden she removes a bullet from herself, asking if Morgan did this to her.

Griffin tells Ava that they were able to remove the bullet without damaging the spinal cord, but her future mobility is uncertain.

Carly says Morgan should have been committed and Kiki was shot because they left Morgan to his own devices. Andre says he’s in the hospital now and his medication will be adjusted. He also suggests frequent blood tests to make sure he’s taking it. And more therapy. Carly asks what if he won’t comply? Andre says if he doesn’t, Morgan will go to prison. Sonny doesn’t like that, but Andre says it’s all the leverage they’ve got.

Fantasy Kiki asks if this happened because of Morgan. He says she wasn’t supposed to be there and she brings up the phone message he left. He gets ready to jump again, saying no one can help him. Kiki says she can, the only way to stop the pain is to end it and they’ll do it together. She takes his hand.

Paul says he’ll deal with Ava in his own time, in his own way. He says obviously Jordan is feeling left out and Jordan says she has every right to be involved. She has a warrant for Ava’s arrest, but thinks there’s more to the story and she’s going to get it from Ava. Paul says the case is bigger than the local PCPD and she can’t arrest Ava. Jordan says watch.

Real Kiki is going to ICU. Griffin tells Ava that Kiki is young, strong and has people that love her, so have faith.

Obrecht points out Ava and Franco hugging, and tells Nina that Franco needs her attention. Wise move.

Carly tells Sonny she’s terrified for Morgan, and that because of the guns, Kiki is fighting for her life. Sonny again says they’re not his guns. Carly says it’s still not normal the way he runs his life. Sonny might as well go legit, since we don’t know what he really does anyway. For all I know, he hangs out in the park all day.

Andre calls out Nurse Ashley for her terrible nursing. Obrecht says someone is fooling around on the roof.

Fantasy Kiki tells Morgan if he ends it, there’s no more pain. One more step, and both of their suffering will be ended. They get ready to jump, Morgan says he’s ready. Michael pops out of the roof door and asks, ready for what? Are all of Sonny’s kids this stupid?

Maxie says she hopes Nathan isn’t soured on weddings because there’s still one more to go. He asks who’s getting married. Maxie gets in the bed with him, and asks him to marry her.

Franco tells Ava the doctor was probably lowering her expectations so he looks like a genius when Kiki recovers. Nina gives Ava Kiki’s jewelry for safe-keeping.

Paul comes in and says he’s sorry to Ava. Ava says it’s all his fault and she’s going to kill him. Not so loud, Ava.

Carly goes to the bathroom to wash the blood off of her hands. She spaces out, thinking about the events at the pier.

Michael tells Morgan he’s been looking for him and what is he doing on that ledge. Fantasy Kiki tells him to get rid of Michael. Michael asks who he was talking to. Morgan says Kiki, but Michael tells him he’s in ICU. Morgan says to go away, he wants to be alone. Andre pops out and Morgan starts talking about killing himself. It’s getting like Grand Central Station up on that roof.

Kiki is scrubbing her hands like a maniac. Griffin comes in and asks if she’s all right. She tells him no.

Morgan says every day is worse and he wants to stop hurting people. Andre says if he commits suicide that everyone will want to know why. Morgan says the pills were supposed to fix everything an they didn’t.Andre says give it more time.Morgan talks about his ED and says what kind of life is that, so he went off the pills to prove he’s a man with a purpose and then did stupid things. He talks about Darby, Kiki, and what happened at the pier. He says he screwed up and Kiki was shot because of him. Andre says it’s a lot to think about, but think about a time he was happy, before he felt like he was down a hole.

Morgan talks about seeing his baby sister. Andre says it wasn’t that long ago and he can get back to that. Sonny pops out and says he can fight his way out of the hole.

Maxie says she realizes that she was on an anti-marriage tear, but things are different now. She loves Nathan and wants a future with him. He says he loves her too, but no.

Ava goes crazy on Paul. Paul says she won’t do Kiki any good in jail and asks to speak with her privately.

Carly asks Griffin how Kiki is. He says she’s off to a good start, but that’s as much as he can say. Carly says yeah, doctor/patient confidentiality like he had with Sonny. She asks if he knew that Sonny was keeping his progress a secret to better fight his enemies. She asks how the Hippocratic Oath and “do no harm” is working for him.

Anna asks Jordan if she’s going to arrest Ava since Paul isn’t too keen on it. Jordan says Anna knows more since she was working with Paul behind her back. Anna says she learned about the shipment five minutes before it happened and there are a lot of loose ends. Jordan says she’s going after Paul for the Carrrlos cover-up. Anna says if she does that, she’ll have to arrest Anna too.

Paul tells Ava that Jordan is planning to arrest her. Ava says if she goes down, she’s taking him with her.

Morgan babbles about Kiki and Sonny tries to talk him down. Sonny says he knows how Morgan feels and that he wanted to do the same thing at one time, but now he’s living proof that you can find a way out. He asks if Morgan wants to hurt his family. Sonny gets on the ledge with him. He says if Morgan jumps, they’re jumping together. Then Michael pushes them both off he roof. Not really. Just seeing if you’re paying attention.

Nathan says maybe one day he’ll marry Maxie, when she really wants to get married. He reminds her of what she said on Valentine’s Day. She says things have changed. He says that’s only because he got shot. He wants her to want to get married on her own free will and he wants to get it right because she’s worth it.

Anna tells Jordan about how Paul caused the Carrrlos trail to go cold, and there’s been no arrest for Duke’s murder. She asks for more time and tells Jordan she’ll have more people to arrest than she knows what to do with. Anna begs her for a few weeks. She says she wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t vital to the case. Jordan says okay, but she’d better not regret it and Anna is pushing the limits of their friendship.

Griffin says he heard about the violence and wondered if he played a role. He wondered if it would have been different if he hadn’t kept Sonny’s secret. Carly says a lot of people were to blame, including herself, but not him. He gets a text that Kiki is going to ICU. He tells Carly that he doesn’t see a failure, but a woman struggling to do what’s right for her family, but it’s not easy considering Sonny’s line of work.

Morgan says Sonny has no reason to jump. Sonny says Morgan is the reason, because if he jumps, sonny has failed as a father and he’ll die of a broken heart anyway. He says we either jump or go back in and be with family and friends. Morgan steps down.

Paul tells Ava they’re on the same side. She says only because he forced her. Griffin comes to get Ava she tells Paul she doesn’t care what he does, just deal with it.Ava goes in to see Kiki.

Maxie says she supposes Nathan is right. He’s getting drowsy and she leaves.

Jordan tells Paul she has a warrant for Ava’s arrest. He asks to see it and then rips it up. He tells Jordan Ava was cooperating with the justice department the whole time and has immunity. Bye, Felicia…I mean, Jordan.

Ava speaks to Kiki even though she’s unconscious, telling her that her mother will be right there. Then she sings All Through the Night while we see what everyone is doing.

Sonny brings Morgan back to the hospital ward and Carly hugs him. Andre takes him back to his room. Lots of pondering from everyone.

Next week, the question of who is Claudette is posed, Jason asks about the Jake’s surgery, and Anna says go ahead and arrest her.

People’s Couch Quotes

We have a new couple this week, Budd and Mackenna, who are boyfried/girlfriend. They seem funny and cute and have a large dog which is always a plus with me.

Dogs played a part in this week’s episode, since the Couches watched the Westminster Dog Show. Joe, of the Resnick family, brought in a special guest for the occasion, a sweet, plump, older Pug, who seemed to react only when there were dogs who looked similar to him on the screen. A couple of the Couch’s dogs did tricks, with Mackenna’s dog throwing up and eating it slightly off camera (thank you), proving once again how pets are out to embarrass you; and Peewee, who watches TV with Julie and Brandy, giving a demonstration of humping his toy penguin. Although he was egged on by Julie.

Does no one else see that Kanye West is doing an entire fashion line from this look? Scott, referring to the zombies in The Walking Dead.

The only appropriate condiments are sweet relish, ketchup, ranch dressing and Miracle Whip, not mayonnaise. Emerson while watching Recipe for Deception.

Feb24

February 23, 2016 — GH, Haves & Nots & Haves

Posted on February 24, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Lulu is handcuffed with duct tape over her mouth. Raj says she shouldn’t have been there.

Kiki tells Michael about the message Morgan left, including the change in time for the arms shipment. Michael says he’ll handle it. Anna says Morgan is going to walk right into the gun deal.

Morgan says Dixon is disrespecting Sonny in running arms through his territory and if he doesn’t throw his gun into the water, Morgan is going to shoot.

Since Kiki is really, really stupid, she leaves for the pier.

The minister reads 1 Corinthians 13 because it’s a requirement.

Carly wants to get Morgan out of there

Jordan asks Dante where things stand between him and Lulu. He says they’re talking, so he’s wondering why she’s ignoring his texts. Jordan tells him to give Lulu some room.

Raj tells Lulu about the text. He throws her phone into the water. He says he has work to do and looks through the binoculars to the pier.

Paul tells Morgan to cool his jets. All the guns go into the water. Paul says he doesn’t have a gun and Morgan says he doesn’t believe it. He tells one of the thugs to open a crate. Yep, it’s weapons. Dixon tells Morgan he should call his father because he’s 3 seconds away from starting a war. Someone moves and Morgan shoots.

The minister reads the whatever it is that makes you man and wife. Weren’t they writing — oh, okay, usually they do that before the I do’s — Alexis and Julian read their own vows. Alexis says that Julian has made her think all things are possible and that she found the life partner she never knew she needed. Julian says that when he found Alexis, he realized what he truly wanted and he’ll spend the rest of his life doing whatever he can to make her happy. Obviously, I’m paraphrasing.

Anna is calling her lead agent, while Carly and Michael try to explain Morgan’s illness and that they need to go to the pier. They rush out the door, leaving Anna still on the phone.

Jordan tells Dante someone walking their dog heard shots fired at the pier and everyone tears out of the station.

Raj complains about something always going wrong and I identify. He says the cops will be there any minute. He says he has to go and so does Lulu. I’m not sure why he doesn’t just leave her there. It’s not like she even knows who he really is.

Morgan tells everyone not to move. Paul says someone heard the shot and how is he going to make the cops believe Sonny isn’t culpable? Paul tells him to leave before something happens he can’t take back. Morgan says he’s the king of the world and can do anything.

Commercial break. I try to calm down from a plumbing problem I just had a half hour before the show where I couldn’t get the water in the upstairs sink to shut off.

Dixon and one of the thugs rush Morgan and Dixon gets his gun. Dixon says give him a good reason not to put a bullet in Morgan’s head and I can’t come up with one.

The happy couple are about to exchange rings, but Lucas can’t find them.Franco suggests to Nina that Sonny paid someone off to hide them. Molly tells Lucas to check his inside breast pocket and voila! Rings. Brad says it’s bad luck for a wedding to go off without a hitch. Maybe this explains my life. My wedding was relatively trouble-free, except for a friend’s date who tried to keep up with my husband’s friends in the drinking department, and ended up sick in the bathroom for half the night. Ava wonders where Kiki is. The rings are finally exchanged. Applause.

Lulu struggles with Raj who throws her over the side of the boat. Um, her hands are free. Won’t she be able to swim?

Dixon says Morgan is going to pay for messing things up. Morgan says go ahead and shoot him.Dixon say Morgan is trouble he didn’t need. Paul tells him it will just make things worse and there will be huge problems with Sonny if Dixon shoots Morgan. Paul says this is not what he signed up for and that Morgan is crazy. That makes Morgan go crazy.

No surprise, Kiki comes running into the mix. Dixon shoots. Who, we won’t know until after the commercial. I’m guessing Kiki, who should never have gotten involved with Morgan again.

Yep, I’m right. I ain’t been watching this 50 years for nothing. Anna and the Feds show up and tell everyone to get on the ground. An agent tells Morgan to get away from Kiki so he can see his hands. Carly and Michael show up.

Lulu gets to the surface and gets the tape off of her mouth.

The minister says no applause until he actually makes the pronouncement. He does, they kiss, and more applause. Lots of comments among the guests.

Dixon comes running into the church with a gun. He says nobody move. He puts the gun on Sonny and Sonny tells him he has one chance to live. He tells Dixon to put the gun down and get out. Man, he’s got some confidence.

Commercial break. I ponder what a freaking jerk Morgan is.

Dixon tells Sonny it was his kid who caused the trouble. Sonny says the last place Dixon should have come to was the church. Dixon is like, Morgan is a nut and what’s Sonny going to do in a wheelchair. Dixon tells Ava since the shipment was going to her gallery and she’s going to help him now. He tells her that Paul was working for the Feds and asks if she was in on it, or was Paul screwing her too. Well…..

Carly tends to Kiki an they call for an ambulance. Anna asks Paul what went wrong. He says everything starting with lunatic Morgan. Paul tells Anna the details of what happened. He says they had Morgan subdued, but something Morgan said set Dixon off and he ended up shooting Kiki instead of Morgan.

Jordan arrives with more cops. Anna gets on the phone. Carly says Kiki needs medical attention now.

Dante goes to The Haunted Star. Lulu is gasping for air in the water, as he calls her name. I guess she must be weighted down somehow. She tries getting his attention, but he can’t hear her. Instead of trying to form a sentence, maybe she should just yell.

Dixon says if anyone leaves their seat, they’ll be shot. He asks whose idea it was to have a wedding the night of the shipment, and starts talking like he’s crazier than Morgan, having everyone introduce themselves. He says no one will have a better name that Bradley Cooper and they can skip the others. Franco says how disappointed he is and how he’s so unpopular. He says he’s taken hostages in his day and Dixon is going about it all wrong. He suggests Dixon only keep one hostage. First, he suggests Sonny because he’s a lowlife, but he’s in a wheelchair which is problematic, so maybe Julian, since it’s his fault they’re all there. Alexis says why doesn’t he volunteer, but Franco says he’s the worst hostage ever. Dixon tells him nice effort.

Dixon has Brad collect the cell phones and it reminds me of the time Todd held everyone hostage with a fake bomb on One Life to Live. Dixon asks the minister how he gets out of there. The minister explains the layout of the church, for so long that I’m wondering if it’s the Vatican. Everyone whispers among themselves.

Jordan says no one told her about anything. Anna runs to Kiki. Paul tells Jordan to get Morgan out of there and take him to the station for questioning. Morgan doesn’t want to go and Jordan tells Michael to deal with him. Michael tells Morgan he can’t help Kiki by arguing with the police and they’ll do this together. Anna calls for paramedics again.

Brad collects the phones. Dixon wants a show of hands to make sure no one is armed. Sonny tells him to relax and think of a plan. Dixon says who needs it with all the hostages. Sonny says maybe Franco was right, he is wealthy with resources. He says one phone call he’ll have a car with clean plates and two million dollars. Sonny tells him they don’t have much time and if the cops get there, time’s up. Nathan — for whatever reason, since Sonny was doing really well there — decides to jump up. Dixon shoots him.

Lulu manages to call for Dante, but he’s wandering around the boat. He keeps calling for her. She starts to sink, and their relationship flashbacks through her mind.

Morgan is going apesh*t at the station, rambling on about taking his dad’s gun. Jordan says if he doesn’t calm down, she’s going to arrest him. Michael says Morgan isn’t talking without a lawyer. Morgan gets crazier and Jordan reads him his rights.

At the pier, the Feds take stock of the shipment, but they realize Dixon is gone.

Lucas says he can help, but Dixon says the rules haven’t changed and to sit down. Maxie says he’ll have to shoot her too and please let her help. Dixon says he’s a sucker for a pretty face, and she asked nice, so okay. He says anyone who moves gets shot. Then he says maybe he should just shoot Sonny right now.

Tomorrow, Anna tells Paul the sting was a disaster (like he doesn’t know), Ava volunteers to be a hostage, and Maxie says she can’t stop Nathan’s bleeding.

The Haves and The Have Nots

Candace is beating the crap out of the social worker, Aliyah. Candace asks if she’s going to talk now. Aliyah says okay, but she doesn’t know where Oscar is. Candace asks how she was paid. Aliyah says in cash. $25,000. Whoa. Aliyah says Oscar said he’d pay her if a judge needed to see that Candace had money in the bank. Candace asks where the cash is and Aliyah says she spent all of it. Another whoa. Aliyah asks Candace not to say anything because she could lose her job, adding she won’t go to the police. Candace says she could lose her life if she doesn’t come up with the 25K. Aliyah says she’ll go to her credit union. Candace tells her she wants 100K then, and her son. She wants a recommendation that she get custody and gives Aliyah six hours.

Candace tells her to find out where Oscar is too, or she’ll be sorry. Man, this chick has some cojones. After Aliyah leaves, Wendy says they might not find Oscar, so she hopes Candace is thinking about plan B.

Oscar goes to David’s office. The only thing he’s come up with on Veronica so far is the name of the photographer Maggie hired to take the picture of Veronica and Benny. He says the affair started when Veronica got Benny out of jail. He asks that David not give up the photographer’s name because he wants to continue their business relationship. David thanks him and Oscar says he’ll keep David posted.

Kathryn arrives next. She tells David that the DA let her out, but Jennifer refuses to release Jim and Veronica. Kathryn’s cell phone rings. It’s Lloyd from the bank. She says she’ll call back when she has time. David says he’s working on something to get Jim and Veronica out. Kathryn doesn’t believe him because she spoke to Judge Carter who told her David isn’t getting Veronica out. He says she’s safer in jail. Kathryn says he needs to put on his big boy pants and deal. He says it’s not about the affair, and Kathryn doesn’t have the whole picture.

He asks where Veronica lives. Kathryn says she doesn’t know, but what does that have to do with getting her out of jail? Then she asks how David got out. He says Maggie called in favors. Kathryn asks why she didn’t call in favors for the others, and Maggie, standing behind her, says she didn’t want to. She tells Kathryn she needs to put some distance between herself and Jim. Kathryn says if no one will help Jim, she will. Maggie says that’s not wise. Kathryn says it’s not wise for anyone to underestimate her power.

When Kathryn is gone, David tells Maggie she shouldn’t have lied to him about the photos and leaves her standing in his office by herself.

DA Jennifer calls bank guy Lloyd. He says he got her emails, faxes and court order this morning. She asks why he hasn’t responded. She says she knows he does a lot of business with the Cryers and doesn’t want to upset that, but the court order was signed by a judge. He says he knows the family and something isn’t right here. Jennifer mentions the court order again and tells him that when Wyatt comes in he’d better hand over the funds. If he calls Kathryn or tries to interfere in any way, she’ll consider it attempting to tamper with the safety of a witness.

Candace tells Wendy that she had it all, she had money and was going to take the bar, and Jim took everything. She says maybe her mother is right. She says she’s been in deep with people who had everything to lose, now she’s in deep with someone who has nothing to lose — Warlock.

Wendy says she hopes Candace didn’t cross him. Candace says she just didn’t tell him everything. Wendy tells her to remember a couple of other girls who crossed him and please say she has a plan. Candace says the only plan is to find Oscar. Wendy says she has to tell Benny. Candace says she can’t, and hopefully the money from Aliyah will be enough to buy her time. Wendy says that girl isn’t going to come up with the money.

Candace says maybe she can mortgage her place. Wendy says Benny will help if she tells truth. Candace says if Benny finds out Warlock is shaking her down, he’ll go crazy. She wonders why she puts herself in these situations. She says again maybe her mother was right. Wendy says stop saying that because that would mean her preacher father is right. Candace says let’s do what we do. Wendy tells her she’d better tell Benny about mortgaging the house.

Kathryn is at he jail with a lawyer. Veronica comes in and makes me laugh, saying she thought Kathryn would have changed clothes by now. Jim comes in too, and Kathryn says no one will help them. The lawyer says they should see the press. Veronica says they have Maggie to thank for that. Jim asks how bad it is and the lawyer says pretty bad.

Veronica asks if David is trying to get her out. Kathryn says no and Veronica asks why not. Jim asks her if she saw the paper and that he’d leave her rot. I note that Jim realistically looks like he hasn’t shaved in a while. Jim tells Kathryn to tell Veronica the truth. At first Kathryn says David is working on it, but then she admits David isn’t going to help her.

Veronica tells Jim to keep enjoying this. He says he will, but she has no idea how much he’d like her to get out. The lawyer says he’s sure he can get both of them bail. Veronica says she’s going to represent herself. The lawyer tells her that’s a bad idea, but she brings up how many times she’s beat him in court and says she’ll get herself out.

Wyatt comes to the DA’s office. Jennifer tells him his mother is out of jail and his father is having a bail hearing, but he won’t be released . Jennifer gives him paperwork and says she called the bank. She says if Lloyd won’t give Wyatt his inheritance, he’ll go to jail. Wyatt asks what happens if his mother shows up. Jennifer says that’s why she called the bail hearing for today. Man, this is about the most corrupt town ever. She tells Wyatt she’s counting on him. He says he’ll be there. She asks him to please get out of the Cryer house. I hate this woman.

Hanna is sitting in the Cryer’s kitchen when David walks in. He asks what happened and Hanna says Wyatt happened. He asks if she’s going to clean it up and she says no. He says he just came from her house and he’s sorry. She says she bets he is.

He asks if she’s aware of what happened. She says Wyatt hit her son and the little girl and they covered it up. He says she doens’t know the whole story. He says the Cryers might not be home for a while. She says she needs her check and asks why he’s there. He says he was hoping to speak with her about her son.

David asks if Veronica was with Benny the night Benny borrowed his truck. Hanna says she’s had it with all their bs. He says Veronica is a conniver. He doesn’t want Benny caught up in her games and he’s trying to protect him. She asks how, and he says the only way he can answer is for her to tell him all she knows . She says she knows he thinks she’s just an ignorant maid and that he wants her to tell him things he can use against Benny. She says she doesn’t trust him, doesn’t like him and he’s a liar. She says she has nothing else to say. She’s going to sit and wait for her check, and if he wants to know anything, he should ask her son directly. He says he already did and Benny told him to ask his wife. Hanna says she raised him better than that, and Benny should have said ask his triflin’ ass wife. Bye, David. Nice scene.

David calls Oscar (or whatever his name really is). He asks for contacts to reroute phone calls.

While staying at a hotel, Wyatt is picking out a place to live. He’s looking on the realtor’s laptop and chooses a 3 million dollar property. He tells the realtor he wants to close as quickly as possible. The realtor says he’ll get the owner to lease the place to him until the closing. Wyatt says get some chicks over too. The dude says how about some blow too and pulls out a humongous bag of cocaine. One stop shopping!

Jennifer says the people ask for no bail. Jim’s lawyer says that’s ridiculous, he’s been a model citizen. Jennifer says he covered up a murder and has access to private jets. The judge says no bail. Jim basically curses him out and the judge says he’ll hold him in contempt. Jim says who cares since he’s in jail anyway. The judge gives him an extra 30 days. Bail fail.

The DA requests no bail for Veronica too. Veronica says it was a matter of client attorney privilege because she was Jeffrey’s counsel. Jennifer says Jeffrey will testify that she’s not his lawyer The judge says that’s for the trial and releases Veronica.

Benny comes to the tow yard office. Suddenly, they have no tows. Mitch says the phones aren’t working and what’s going on? Benny says he doesn’t know .Mitch says ever since David came in, they haven’t had any business. Benny says that’s got nothing to do with it and Mitch says if he says so. Benny tries calling the office from his cell phone, but the phone doesn’t ring.

Candace calls Landon. She asks to meet him later. He hears idiot Maggie crying in her office and gives her a box of tissues. Maggie says he was right and she shouldn’t have done this. David says no she shouldn’t have from where he suddenly appears in the doorway.

Benny comes in behind David and David says oh, Benny decided to see him after all. Benny says says David decided to do something to his phones. David says he needs to know what Benny had going with his wife. Benny says he wants his phones back and it was nothing with Veronica. David says to tell him everything or he’ll never get his phones back. They start to tussle and Landon comes in saying Veronica is out of jail and David Dashes out the door.

Next week, Quita is still looking for Quincy, Candace sets up Landon, and Veronica is on the loose.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Mauricio and his agency are partnering with Soulcycle for a Habitat for Humanity charity event. Kyle, LisaV, Kathryn and Erika attend. Lisa asks if she heard they’re supposed to bike for 4 to 5 minutes or 45 minutes. She says she hasn’t spent 45 minutes straddling anything since 1984. She isn’t thrilled with spinning.

The instructor is all zen and tells everyone to go at their own pace, no pressure. This looks like fun, but I’d probably poop out after 5 minutes myself. He turns into an evangelist when he asks if everyone is a believer. Lisa is wearing pink patent pumps. Say that three times real fast. The event is a success.

The girls go to lunch afterward. They wonder what’s up with Yolands, and Kyle says they she and Eileen didn’t leave things on a positive note. Eileen joins them and they talk about Eileen’s soap job. Lisa asks about the love scenes and if they’re fun. Eileen says it’s more technical than anything else.

Yolanda joins them. She brought pink flowers for Lisa’s birthday. Yolanda asks how the spin thing went and Lisa tells her be glad she wasn’t there. The girls compare muscles.

Yolanda is hosting a dinner party at a restaurant. They talk about LisaR’s husband being in Mad Men and it getting nominated for an Emmy. Kyle asks Yolanda how things are between her and Lisa and she says fine. Kyle thinks everyone always sweeps everything under the rug. She and LisaV start talking about some conversation after Yolanda left.

Eileen asks what they’re talking about. Erika says something about LisaR saying that Yolanda said she was bi-polar. Yolanda says she only said she could say that and Kyle says that’s no different than what Lisa said about Munchausens. Yolanda gets annoyed for Kyle bringing it up, when she’s the one who horned in on a private conversation. Yolanda says they were being rude and whispering. Yolanda says she and LisaR worked things out. Kyle says fine, it’s none of her business and Yolanda says then mind your own business. Kyle tells Yolanda to give her an f-ing break and I second that. This is really stupid.

LisaR is on Jenny McCarthy’s Sirius Radio show, Dirty, Sexy, Funny. Lisa says Jenny is a girl’s girl and I agree. Lisa says it’s part of her job to stay relevant. They talk about Lisa and Harry’s sex life. Lisa says her mother told her that one day her mouth would get into trouble, but she makes a lot of money from it. I love how honest Lisa is about her hustle.

Yolanda is going on about Kyle talking about LisaR without her being there. Shut up already. Kyle says she’s friends with Lisa. In her individual interview, Yolanda says yeah, when it’s convenient. Yolanda tells Kyle to drop it. She adds that she keeps a lot in the vault, whatever that means. Kyle asks if that’s some kind of threat. LisaV says Yolanda shouldn’t have put it out there that she could call LisaR bi-polar. Yolanda says same with LisaR talking about Munchausens. I’m so startled she pronounced it right, I miss what’s next. Yolanda is suddenly all over LisaV, saying she talked smack about Yolanda’s kids. Lisa says that’s not what happened. Lisa finally has enough of this nonsense. She says she has to do something and leaves.

Kathryn and Erika are having lunch at Erika’s. Kathryn says she wants to be friends, but she needs to know what Erika is about. She says Erika is closed off. Erika says she’s never been liked by girls and was hurt at an early age by girlfriends, so she’s never had a crew. She doesn’t really trust anyone. She says Yolanda is her go-to guy, but she’s a girl.

Erika says her grandmother was the closest female to her, but she passed away. Kathryn volunteers to be her friend and says she’ll have her back. Erika asks what Kathryn thinks of LisaV.

LisaR comes by Kyle’s house. I’m tired of seeing everyone in black. Kyle got an email from Yolanda, scolding her, and it was cc’d to the rest of the ladies. Kyle says she doesn’t know what’s up since she thought they were cool.

Yolanda says she wasn’t able to say what she needed to at the lunch, so she got up in the middle of the night and composed this email. In the email, Yolanda goes blah-blah-blah about how she wanted to have fun at the lunch and Kyle ruined things. LisaR says it’s passive aggression at it’s finest. It’s kind of cool how it’s read, with each of them reading a part of it in succession. Kyle tells LisaR about the vault thing, and LisaR says it’s about keeping secrets to use as ammunition.

This is interspersed with LisaV telling Ken about the lunch and the email. She says she’s got a lot of sympathy for Yolanda, but she has to run because she’s having the ladies over to the house. LisaR can’t make it because she’s going to the Emmys or something.

Erika and Kathryn discuss LisaV. Kathryn thinks she’s sweet. Erika says she’s sweet, but she thinks Lisa “engages from the side, is a sniper from the side and doesn’t want to leave fingerprints.” I like Lisa and wish she would adopt me, so this irritates me a little. Erika says she thinks Lisa is selectively honest and likes to move things to her advantage.

Lisa is in her pool. floating around on a pink flamingo floatie while having a cup of tea. Eileen shows up first and says it’s like Noah’s Ark with all the animals. Lisa has things set up in a private area on the property. Her place is so amazing. Honestly, Lisa, I wouldn’t be any trouble at all. You’d never even know I was there.

Lisa brings out her new puppy and everyone squees. They sit down to lunch. She tells Ken to call the ponies and everyone chimes in with calling various animals and it’s pretty funny. Kyle says the email from Yolanda was awkward. Kathryn says Yolanda was just collecting her thoughts, but Kyle says she was basically reprimanded in front of everyone. Kathryn says it pulls everyone in whether they want to be in or not.

Kyle says she understands Yolanda is sick. They talk about how LisaV didn’t say anything bad about the kids and Kyle backs that up, prompting Lisa to both be startled and thank her. They move on to Kathryn having a boxing class with Erika’s trainers. She says afterwards, they discussed LisaV.

Kathryn says the started off talking about her grandmother and it’s obviously Erika’s soft spot, but she sucked it back in. She says then they talked about LisaV and Erika said not to get caught in her web. Lisa is a little taken aback. She says she doesn’t have time to go to the bathroom much less spin a web. Eileen can’t believe that Kathryn repeated what Erika said. Eileen seems to think it has something to do with Lisa’s apology to Eileen in the Hamptons and how Lisa didn’t really seem to understand where she was coming from. How did this turn into something about her?

Eileen says Lisa has a habit of minimizing and it felt like she dismissed Eileen without a resolution and maybe Yolanda feels that way. Lisa says she needs to work on that, and Eileen thinks she’s being dismissive again. She says she thinks Lisa feels like she’s being attacked. Kyle says everyone is different in the way they need to hear an apology. This is actually pretty astute of Kyle. Eileen doesn’t seem to want to let it go and Lisa says she’s truly sorry. Eileen says they’re good and Lisa says how good because she needs to be really good to move on.

Eileen says they’re fine, but she thinks they’ll never understand the situation the same way. In her individual interview, Lisa says Eileen is emotional and maybe they’re built differently. I totally agree with this. I think Lisa is just British and they do have a different way of expressing their emotions, mostly not at all. Lisa says she doesn’t like to be petty and Eileen says but it’s people’s feelings and therefore important. Lisa says okay, she’s wrong again. Eileen tells her she doesn’t have to play the victim and Lisa asks if anybody wants more wine. I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad idea.

Next time, Harry Hamlin meets the girls, a trip to Dubai is in the works, and Kim and Brandi make appearances.

Feb23

February 22, 2016 — GH’s Julian Gets Married & PUMP’s James Gets Fired

Posted on February 23, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Hayden and Nicholas are basking in the afterglow. Hayden doesn’t want to get out of bed, but Nicholas says they have to get ready for the wedding.

Maxie wonders why Nathan is still working, and he says there is a lot of crime afoot and felons don’t look at social calendars.

Julian orders more champagne. How drunk are these people planning on getting before the wedding? He goes to open the bottle and cuts his hand.

Josslyn and Carly are having a bite to eat. Carly dances around Sonny’s employment, but Josslyn says she knows he’s a crime lord.

Sonny is alone in the church asking forgiveness for all the lies he’s telling his family. I guess killing people is okay though. Alexis and her bridesmaid daughters arrive at the church and find Sonny there. Alexis asks him what he’s doing there and he says to attend the wedding, but he’s wearing a tux, so isn’t that obvious?

Anna says they need to put out an APB on Sonny.

We revisit the scene with Paul, Dixon and the briefcase. Paul wants to inspect the goods before he hands the money over.

Nathan is changing at the station. He’s puts on his holster. Maxie asks if he thinks something bad is going to happen and he asks if she’s noticed who the groom is. She talks him out of taking it while I yell, “No!” at the TV. Maxie finds a woman’s white glove in the pocket of his tux and asks what’s up with that.

Hayden and Nicholas got busy again, so now they’re really running late. Hayden says it’s her first time out as a princess. This makes me feel a little sad, since I’m doubting she’s going to be one for long. While she’s dressing, Nicholas texts Sam and asks if there’s any news about Baxter.

Kristina (whose name I’ve been spelling wrong since I started this blog) is all happy about Sonny. She says the best wedding present she could give her mother was a truce between Sonny and Julian. The girls go to get ready and Alexis asks Sonny why he’s doing this.

Lucas comes to the rescue, getting supplies to bandage Julian’s hand. Julian says it’s a good thing he cut himself because it shows Olivia’s vision was noting major. Olivia wants to leave Leo with the sitter. She says something about it being past his bedtime, but I think she believes something bad is still going to happen.

Michael comes in and Anna tells him she has to talk to Sonny regarding a criminal investigation. He asks if his father is the subject of the investigation. Anna says no, but she doesn’t want the Corinthos people screwing it up. Too late. Morgan is on the loose.

Paul wonders why things are taking so long and Dixon says it’s the biggest shipment they’ve ever had. Dixon asks where he’s going to send the goods. Paul says he has the Jerome organization at his disposal and will easily be able to move them. The winch on the boat gets stuck and they’re going to have to bring the crates in by hand.

Paul calls Anna. He says that as soon as the money changes hands, that’s the signal for the agents to move in. Morgan is watching from a distance, but Dixon also sees Paul on the phone and asks who he was talking to.

Maxie asks why the glove is in Nathan’s tux jacket. He says it’s been a long time since he wore the tux. Maxie says it was the Nurses Ball, but he says Maxie had brought the wrong tux. He reminds her that he grew up privileged and has more than one.

Josslyn tells Carly that she thinks Sonny’s job is cool. She’s hoping he could come to her school for career day. Ha-ha-ha! He’d certainly be more interesting than the weatherman I saw at mine. Carly says it’s not cool and he’d only go if it’s for his coffee business. Josslyn’s friend, Kylie, calls about a sleepover and Carly tells her not to talk about their conversation to her friends.

Carly sees Kiki and asks if she’s seen Morgan. She says she knows what happened and that Morgan is still dealing with issues. She asks if Kiki can still be his friend. Ava pops in and says Kiki doesn’t need to do anything for Morgan.

Alexis questions Sonny, since he hates Julian. He says he’s doing it for Kristina. Alexis says is was disingenuous for him to let Kristina think she accomplished a truce. He changes the topic a little, saying that he knows something is on Kristina’s mind and he wants to be supportive. He gives his word that he’s not there for trouble. Alexis accepts that.

Michael says Dante has been asking questions about an arms syndicate. He says his father is a coffee importer and we all laugh hysterically. Anna is like, oh come on, and he says that Sonny wants nothing to do with arms smuggling, and that there won’t be any trouble from him. And actually, I’m not sure Sonny might have cared so much if Ava wasn’t involved and he didn’t want custody of Avery.

Paul tells Dixon he was talking to the authorities, giving me apoplexy.

Alexis finds roses, champagne and a card from Julian. She wants a moment alone, but first has a toast with her daughters. She says even though she’s marrying Julian she’ll always love them more and they’ll always be her true life partners. As it should be. Alexis needs to finish writing her vows, so the girls leave.

Olivia tells Sonny he’s the last person she expected to see. She’s wearing a dress with the coolest neckline ever. It’s hard to describe, but it has ridges kind of like the ones around a Reeses Cup.

Franco and Nina arrive. Franco says that churches freak him out, all the saints staring at him. Nina says he needs to get past that to get married in St. Patrick’s Cathedral. He says who said anything about marriage? What?! Don’t disappoint me, Franco.

Julian tells Kristina that he left Alexis a preview of his vows. She’s reading it, getting choked up while we trip down Memory Lane with Julian and Alexis flashbacks. This gives me time to eat some leftover Chinese food while watching. Stop ctying, Alexis, you’ll ruin your makeup.

Julian says he doesn’t remember seeing Sonny on the guest list. Sonny says you do things for your children you don’t do for anyone else. Yeah, like kill people.

Relief. Paul tells Dixon that he was giving misdirection to the cops.

Sam congratulates Hayden on her wedding (shouldn’t that be marriage?). Hayden goes off to do whatever and Nicholas asks if Sam’s found anything out.

Kiki picks up the message from Morgan. Since he told her where he is, why doesn’t she just tell someone? She grabs her coat and rushes out.

Franco says he wants to spend the rest of his life with Nina, but they just started getting it together and it’s moving fast. He says he never considered himself marriage material. She says they’re living together, so why doesn’t he want to get married? He says marriage ruins everything and says it way too loud. Everyone in the church turns to look at him.

Carly gets back to the house. Anna says Michael will fill her in and starts to leave, but Michael finds that Sonny’s gun box is empty.

Kiki texts Morgan to call her immediately. That’s right. Don’t get help. I bang my head against the wall.

Paul tells Dixon he’s made sure no one is going to ruin the deal. They hear Morgan being way too loud for a spy.

Carly says she spoke to the guards and anyone who took the gun must live there. That would be Morgan.

Dixon’s thugs root out Morgan. He’s hidden the gun and comes with them willingly.

Nina says she didn’t realize Franco felt so strongly and she wouldn’t want to ruin his life. He tries to backtrack, but she tells him not to dig himself in deeper.

Sam tells Nicholas she left Baxter a message.

Kristina asks if Hayden is going to change her name and Hayden says she never liked her name much in the first place. I’m not sure which name she’s talking about, her real name or Barnes.

Sam and Sonny talk about Shriners hospital. I hope they get some donations out of this. Lucas and Brad arrive. Lucas says he’s leaning on Brad for moral support Brad says he can do better than that, and shows him his divorce papers.. Lucas asks how he swung it, but Julian interrupts and it’s time to start the wedding.

I probably don’t need to tells you that you really could wear these bridesmaids dresses again. They’re absolutely gorgeous, strapless with a beautiful neckline in a hip violet blush color, simply designed with no giant flowers or bows hanging off of them. Oh wait, that was just Kristina’s dress. The others have different dresses, but no less stunning.

Wow, wow, wow! Alexis has a simple V-neck dress with a mermaid hem, but what I really love are the rhinestone straps and how they extend along the edges of the dress.

Anna asks why Morgan would take Sonny’s gun. Carly says he was recently diagnosed as bi-polar and she doesn’t think he’s taking his meds. Anna asks if he’s been violent, and Carly says no, but he’s been acting erratically and his decision making has been bad.

Sh*tshow on the way.

Morgan starts telling Paul how he shouldn’t be there because it’s Sonny’s territory and he heard them saying Sonny was weak, but they’re wrong. He says they’re making a big mistake and he’s there to protect Sonny’s interests. Paul says that’s highly doubtful and that Sonny probably doesn’t even know what’s going on. Dixon tells the thugs to get rid of Morgan, but Paul says that would be a mistake.

Back at the wedding, Sam reads one of Shakespeare’s sonnets.

Paul says Dixon doesn’t want trouble with Sonny and they should let Morgan go. He says he’s responsible for handling Sonny.

Carly asks Anna not to make it an official issue. Kiki calls Michael. She says Morgan hasn’t answered her texts or calls. Finally, finally, she tells him about Pier 54. The way such a crowd hangs out there all the time, you’d think it was Studio 54. Pretty soon there’s going to be a velvet rope at the entrance.

Dixon says it’s Morgan’s lucky night and to get lost. Morgan says screw you. Dixon pushes him and tells him to go while he has the chance. Morgan pulls out the gun and says nobody move.

Tomorrow, the wedding continues, Morgan threatens to shoot Dixon, and Raj threatens to get rid of Lulu. And I can’t wait to find out what happens at Pier 54.

Vanderpump Rules

Scheana, Ariana and Katie go lingerie shopping, and millions of guys suddenly pay attention to this show. Ariana says she and Scheana are sweeping their issues under the rug, but she’s rolling with it. Katie says she and Schwartz haven’t consummated the engagement yet, so she’s hoping to get that going with some new undies.

Kristen’s friend, Rachel, invites Scheana and Katie to her house in Palm Springs, but Stassi is also invited, putting a damper on things. Katie isn’t too happy about Schwartz inviting Stassi to the engagement party either.

They discuss Jax’s narcissism and how he told Tom he’s the number one guy in the group, proving that he’s really a 12-year-old boy in a 36-year-old man’s body.

James insists he’s the white Kanye West — which might be true if we’re talking about personality defects and an inflated sense of self-importance — and is making a Pump CD. Lisa asks if the song he made with Lala is going to be on it, but James says it’s complicated. He says part of him misses Kristen. Lisa says if there’s something destructive in your life, you have to get rid of it, and that includes Kristen and his drinking. He’s grateful to Lisa, and she says show it by being a grown-up.

Ariana calls Tom and tells him that Jax told Scheana the two of them are upset because no one wanted to talk about Tom’s band. Um…that’s so not what happened.

Tom is getting his tattoo removed and Schwartz says the only thing stopping him from getting rid of his is the scary tattoo removal machine. The removal instrument looks something like a stun gun. Tom says it’s literally a pain in the ass, and like a machine gun rubber band smacking you.

Stassi says all she does is sit on Kristen’s couch and drink, and that squatting is a talent she should have tapped into years ago. She’s looking for advice about approaching Katie. Kristen says Katie needs a little push and she’s hoping to manipulate things. Stassi has those grey hair highlights that I hate.

Jax says he keeps repeating things he swore he wouldn’t do anymore — petty fights, rushing into relationships, and being an a-hole in general. He says Shay must be unhappy too, considering his drinking habits. Jax is at the doctor’s office with Brittany and says boobs put him in a great mood. He plays with the implants in the examining room because he’s matured so much. She picks out a size. I sometimes wonder about Brittany. She’s constantly laughing and it makes me think she’s got something missing upstairs. Well, her just being with Jax makes me think that.

Scheana discusses Shay’s drinking with him. She says when he drinks, he drinks too much, and she doesn’t want to be his mom. He says she’s the only one who seems to notice and she says she’s the only one who counts since they’re married. Shay says it’s coming off like she’s calling him a loser and it’s bringing him down. They talk about having kids and moving back home. Wherever that is..

Jax visits Tom and Ariana. They’re getting rid of their couch and he’s there to help move it. He says the couch has a lot of history. I don’t want to know. They get it to the curb after a lot of struggling.

Ariana tells Jax about what Scheana said regarding his altercation with Tom. Tom says that’s not the way it went, but Jax is insistent that’s how he remembers it. Tom tells him to stop making everyone else look like crap to cover his own inadequacies. Jax seems to think Ariana’s influence is making Tom change. Tom says he’s been a good friend to all his friends and Jax is being ridiculous. Jax, who is not too happy, leaves.

Jax wonders who’s more excited about Brittany’s new boobs, him or her. He says that Brittany moving in with him is like getting pants altered, you can’t go back. He keeps talking about her like she’s not a human and it’s really irritating. The D’s are a success.

Peter asks Lala how she’s doing. She says she’s taken up reading books. I’m thinking Dick and Jane, but she claims to have read The Fountainhead. No doubt with a dictionary close by. She says it’s about architecture and I roll my eyes and rest my case. Peter tells her James got into an altercation with Richardson, the head server at PUMP, and it had something to do with him professing his love for Kristen. Lala says James’s drinking is off the chain.

Lisa comes in. Peter asks if she heard about the James thing and how he was insulting Richardson. Lala adds that’s how he gets when he drinks. Lisa says this isn’t acceptable. She says she doesn’t care if Kristen was the catalyst, James needs to get some control. She says she’s not going to let Richardson be disrespected by a little pipsqueak. Leave it to Lisa to find the perfect description for James.

Brittany is recovering from surgery and Jax has to help her do everything, including going to the bathroom. Katie and Schwartz come over. There’s some boob discussion and Katie asks if Jax is coming to their beach party. The engagement pictures are also going to happen there. Katie has decided to invite Lala, ending the not inviting each other competition.

The beach party begins. Katie has very specific vision for the pictures. She has a scenario from some movie where she’s going to “rescue” Schwartz from drowning. At least it’s not the typical deal.

Tom and Ariana start to talk about Jax to Scheana and Shay, but Jax shows up at that moment. He tells them about James. Scheana says all she knows is that Lisa is meeting with both James and Richardson..

Lisa tells Richardson that James will be remorseful and begging, so be ready. Lisa says James has been texting her non-stop apologies. James comes in and says he’s embarrassed. He says Kristen threw her new boyfriend in his face, they started arguing, Richardson intervened and it escalated. Richardson and Lisa talk in French about James’s drinking. Richardson tells James the ratchet things he said. Lisa says this is a pattern and maybe he isn’t ready for the PUMP job. James claims he had an epiphany. Lisa starts to talk and James unwisely interrupts her begging for just a suspension. She tells him to go away and grow up. He asks about the PUMP CD and she says that’s not important right now. She understands he’s remorseful (and crying like a big baby), but maybe this is a lesson for him. She tells him she wants him back to busing tables at SUR a few days a week. He apologizes to Richardson again and leaves. Richardson says Lisa has given James a lot of chances, and she says more than he deserves.

At the beach, Jax wonders where James is. Lala says she’s confused by the men at SUR who need to be glued to a woman while constantly cheating on her. Ariana brings up Kristen wanting to get into sketch comedy. In her individual interview, Ariana says Kristen is a joke, but she doesn’t make jokes. She also says she takes comedy very seriously which makes me laugh. Ariana doesn’t think Rachel’s jokes are funny, even though she’s never seen her show. She thinks that if Kristen is so interested in sketch comedy, she should take a class. Katie calls Ariana on her attitude. Ariana says she’s been faking having a good time with them. Scheana is annoyed with that. I like Ariana, but I’m kind of annoyed too. She kept harping about this taking a class business, and while that’s always a plus, I don’t think it’s necessary. Either you have a flair for entertainment or you don’t, and the audience seemed to be reacting positively to Kristen’s act.

Here comes James with new addition Laurel. Max is also with him. Peter asks what happened with James. He says he got fired from PUMP and the CD is on hold. He says he doesn’t blame anyone, even Kristen. Speaking of which, guess who’s here?

Jax, who can never wait to gossip, tells Kristen what Ariana said about her being in sketch comedy. Since Kristen can’t keep a lid on it, she tells Rachel immediately, and they confront Ariana. Ariana says sorry, she doesn’t think Rachel’s jokes are original. Kristen says Ariana isn’t a stamd-up comic and they argue. Tom adds his two cents. Kristen says Ariana is negative. Tom says Kristen only got back in the group because she’s been ass-kissing. Kristen says she doesn’t need this and screw you.

Everyone watches the sunset. Jax talks to Peter, saying he hasn’t seen one like that since Hawaii. Then he talks about not knowing what the consequences of his Hawaiin shopliftng adventure will be. He knows that his behavior is stupid, and wonders why he acts the way he does, and if he can change. He says even when it doesn’t concern him, he needs to be the center of attention and he doesn’t feel validated unless he’s being talked about. He ponders the possibility of losing his friends and how he doesn’t have anything else. This is actually a little sad.

Next week, Katie rage texts Schwartz, James tells his mother about being fired and Stassi has a surprise visitor.

Yay! The Vanderpump Rules After Show is back! Brandy and Julie are the best!

Feb22

February 21, 2016 — The Dead Walk & the Wives Throw Shade

Posted on February 22, 2016 by theresakp

Standard

What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & recaps from today’s real time TV watching)

The Walking Dead

Carl certainly seems to have recovered well from his eyeball mishap. All seems to be copacetic in Alexandria as well.

Denise gives Daryl a list of things needed as he’s going on a supply run with Rick. She also wants some soda and candy for a couple of the others. Ha-ha-ha! She calls soda “pop” and has to explain that to Daryl, saying she’s from Ohio. Me too, and it took me forever to start calling it “soda.”

Eugene gives Daryl a list of agricultural needs. Daryl and Rick drive off. Rick thinks today is the day they’ll find food and people. They haven’t seen anyone for weeks. Rick puts in a CD, while Daryl begs him not to. I assume they have different musical tastes.

Michonne is on guard duty. She sees Spencer going into the woods with a shovel.

Maggie asks Enid where she’s been. She says nowhere and Maggie thinks there are better places for her to be. Maggie tells her if she needs to talk to come to her.

Daryl and Rick find a feed store out in the middle of nowhere. (Is that where Enid has been?) No zombies inside, so they’re good. They find a truck and Rick suggests using it for the rest of their trip. They take the truck to a filling station, which I would doubt has any gas. They use the truck to flip over a vending machine, but instead of soda, a guy with a bandana over his nose and mouth pops out.

Dude says he was just running from the dead. Daryl asks how many and where. He says more than 10 and they probably have about 10 minutes to get out of there. He says his name is Paul, but his friends used to call him Jesus. Rick starts to ask him the three questions, but Paul-Jesus says he’s in a hurry and runs off.

Rick tells Daryl he noticed that Paul was clean with a trimmed beard, which means he’s been doing okay, and is contemplating picking him up later. They hear some gun shots and run around the other side of the station. It’s only firecrackers. Firecrackers put there by Paul who steals the truck. What would Jesus do? I’m not sure, but what he wouldn’t do is steal your truck.

Michonne follows Spencer. He’s about to whack a zombie and she does it for him. She asks why he’s there and he says he walks in between his shifts, but she’s the first one who’s noticed. She wants to walk with him, but he wants to go it alone. She says his mom told her to figure out what she wants for her life, but right now she’s trying to figure out why he’s walking around in the woods with a shovel.

Carl and Enid are also on a walk in the woods. They find a note in a plastic bag, but it’s wet, so they can’t read it. She says it doesn’t look very old and that means they’re not alone. Enid asks why they’re walking and Carl says that’s what kids do. Enid says she’s not a kid.

Rick and Daryl try chasing after the truck on foot, and come across the vending machine in the road, totally perplexing me. Daryl takes out a couple of cans for Denise. They have a drink and keep running.

Commercial break. Hey, it’s GH’s Obrecht back with Fear 462. And it looks like she’s been bitten. Or scratched. Or something.

Enid and Carl are sitting under a tree, having a snack and reading, when they see Michonne and Spencer. They don’t notice Carl and Enid. Enid says she doesn’t want to come out there anymore. Carl says okay and starts walking away, leaving her to carry everything. Nice.

They see a zombie and while Enid wants to ignore it, Carl is concerned about Michonne. He makes a sound so the zombie changes course. For whatever reason, he isn’t killing it and Enid wants to either kill it or leave. Carl knocks the zombie down and tells her if she doesn’t want to be there, to go home. So she leaves. I would too. He’s getting a little kooky.

Daryl and Rick continue to follow the truck’s trail until they finally see Paul. The truck is stopped and he’s messing around in the back. Rick grabs him from behind, but apparently Paul knows martial arts. Paul slips though and they draw their guns. Rick tells him he wants the keys. Paul says he’s not a bad guy and Rick says Paul doesn’t know what they are.

Rick gets the keys and they tie Paul up. Daryl says the knots aren’t that tight and he should be able to get loose when they’re gone. He throws Paul a can of soda and they take off, Daryl saying good-by with his middle finger.

Rick tells Daryl today is still the day. Well, they did see one person. They realize something is on the roof and stop short. Paul drops to the ground. Daryl jumps out of the moving truck and chases him. Rick stupidly stops the truck to help, which allows Paul to get back in the cab while Rick is dealing with the surrounding zombies. Paul grabs Daryl’s gun and tells Daryl to duck. He shoots a zombie coming up behind Daryl and Daryl knocks Paul out with a punch. All that has resulted from this is the truck sliding backwards and sinking into the nearby lake.

Daryl tells Rick they should go look at cars. Rick says what about unconscious Paul, since he did help Daryl. Daryl says fine, they’ll put him in a tree.

Michonne continues to follow Spencer. He tells her he’s fine, but he needs to take care of something. Or at least try. Michonne asks him to let her help, but he says she can’t. They see Carl in the distance being followed by a zombie.

Spencer says he thought he “saw her that night.” It’s Deanna. I thought they shot her that night. Spencer and Michonne put a hold on her and Spencer puts her out of her misery. So that’s why he was trolling the woods. The scene is brief, but sad.

Spencer and Michonne bury Deanna. He says she left him a note saying he knows his way, but he doesn’t think he does. Michonne says he loved his family and he still has a home in Alexandria. They head back.

Rick and Daryl have still unconscious Paul in the new truck. Rick says Paul must have a hard head, but Denise needs to take a look at him when they get back.

Carl is rocking Baby Judith on the porch. Michonne tells him she saw him with Deanna and that he should have left her or killed her. He says that’s stupid. She says what’s stupid is him being out there and Carl says he couldn’t leave her out there like that and he couldn’t kill her. She asks him if he was playing some kind of game. He says he thought someone who loved her should be the one to end her existence and Michonne would have done the same thing.

Daryl and Carl get back to Alexandria. Paul is still out and they carry him to Denise’s house. Or office. Whatever. They leave Paul on a mattress with a glass of water and a note. We don’t see what the note says.

Rick tries to get some shut-eye on the couch and Michonne tells him to move over. They watch Judith on a monitor. Michonne asks where Daryl is and Rick says he’s watching over a guy. Michonne is like, a guy? and asks him if he wants to talk about it. He says no, but what about her day? She says same thing and Rick asks if she found a guy too. He gives her some mints and says he had toothpaste per her request, but it’s at the bottom of the lake now.

All of a sudden, they realize they’re holding hands. They kiss. Dammit! I want her with Daryl. They move on to more than kissing.

We don’t see what happens next (nor do I want to), but in the next scene they’re nakey and in bed sleeping. Someone tells Rick to wake up. Paul is there. Now I’m wondering where Daryl is.

Next week, I have no idea what happens. Either they didn’t show it or I missed it somehow.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

The ladies are talking about Sheree having Googled Kim’s husband and tell Kim what had been discussed about him, throwing Kenya under the bus. Kenya says when Kim isn’t around, they all have something to say about Chris, but now it’s a different story. I agree. Kenya was not the only one talking about him in a negative way, but now he’s the most wonderful guy ever.

When Kim leaves, Kenya says what’s up with them not saying to her face what they said behind her back. Kenya says the rumors about Chris being gay have been around for years, so it’s not like she’s talking out of turn.

Kim and Nene meet for brunch. Nene feels badly about what happened in regard to Chris. Kim says she’s felt like a target and Nene says she should address it and not be passive.

Phaedra joins them and Nene fills her in. Both Nene and Phaedra say they’ve been Kenya’s targets in the past. Kim says she’s not going to lower herself. Nene says she has to do something, and Phaedra says it’s not necessary to lower herself. They role play to give Kim a reading lesson. They totally make fun of Kenya, which I guess is okay with Kim who finds it hysterically funny. Oddly enough, I think she just did lower herself.

Kandi and Todd go to meet with a potential chef for their restaurant. Todd says everyone is on board with it except Aunt Bertha. The aunts and Mama Joyce have been invited to check out the tasting menu. The chef comes out with the food and says if they don’t like it, he didn’t make it. Ha-ha!

The food looks phenomenal and everyone loves it except Aunt Bertha. She’s only okay with the ribs, which she says are off the chain. Everyone is also good with the restaurant idea except Aunt Bertha. Apparently, Aunt Bertha is a real pita.

Kim says while she appreciates Nene and Phaedra’s advice, reading isn’t her style. She calls Chris and tells him about the ladies Googling his sexual preferences. Chris isn’t bothered, but he mentions that there’s plenty on Google about all of them, like mug shots. Kim says she’d rather play grown than play dirty. Um, Kim, you weren’t playing grown in that restaurant.

Peter takes the group on the river walk that he calls the Jamaican Six Flags. The place is beautiful, but right away Nene is all I can’t do it. She waits while the others go. Kenya and Matt are at the top before anyone else. Cynthia says everything isn’t a competition and it could have been a bonding experience. Nene says she doesn’t like how Kenya is isolating herself. At least she did the activity and didn’t sit it out on the side.

Afterward, the group goes to a jerk place. I don’t mean the people are jerks, appropriate though it may be for this group; I mean the way the meat is smoked. Phaedra makes a face like she smelled something bad while she’s eating. The guys start bugging Matt about the age difference between him and Kenya, which I guess is also okay.

Nene talks about the brunch with Phaedra and Kim, and says they talked about Kenya. She says Kim doesn’t understand what the problem between them is, and suggests they discuss it. Kim says she feels Kenya crossed a line and disrespected her. She wants either no conversation or cordial conversation, but no more talk about her family. Kenya congratulates her on speaking for herself. Cynthia interrupts and says that Kim wasn’t throwing shade and Kenya was disrespectful. Kenya asks not to be interrupted, since she didn’t interrupt Kim. She says she doesn’t hate Kim but she’s indifferent.

Cynthia brings up how Kenya pulled Kim’s chair during an altercation. She says things like that can make an argument turn physical and she owes Kim an apology. Kenya thanks her for her honesty. Kim says it should hae been handled a different way. Kenya apologizes for the chair thing. Kim says if there’s mutual respect, they can get along and agree to disagree.

Cynthia thinks there’s a deeper issue than Kim and Kenya, and that she and Kenya need to address some things. Nene leaves and Peter suggests they have a shot. Frankly, I think that often leads to problems with these people too.

Sheree, Nene and Cynthia go to some ice cream place where I want one of everything. Cynthia seems to think the conversation with Kenya was productive. She also says Nene has come a long way. Really? Cynthia brought a list of things she wants to go over with Kenya and goes over it with the other two. Because it’s okay to throw shade when it’s you.

It’s the last night and Cynthia says despite the problems, she thinks everyone had a good time. They gather for cocktails at a gazebo near the water. Phaedra says Peter looks good enough to bury and Porsha asks if he’s “casket sharp.” Phaedra says when you look good enough to meet Jesus, you’re looking pretty good. She means the real Jesus, not the new Walking Dead guy. Cynthia says that this is the Peter she fell in love with.

It’s dinner time and Kenya still hasn’t shown up. Peter starts talking about how great the trip was, going over everything they’ve done so we can see flashbacks. Kenya and Matt arrive. Sheree’s ex, Bob, who came on the trip is hoping to get back together with her. They all make funny comments about Kenya and Matt. Matt used the word “love” in his conversation with the guys, so that gets some attention.

They talk about the commercial and Cynthia says the only thing missing for her was Kenya. Kenya says she wasn’t given the opportunity to present her concepts and it was hurtful. We flash back to all that mess. Cynthia says even though she chose Kim to direct, she’d wanted Kenya to play opposite her as the best friend. Kenya jokes that was before Nene came back. Nene says she’s always going to be around. Interesting, since the last season we heard from her, she couldn’t stand working with any of them. I guess the big world of acting wasn’t as easy as she thought.

Peter says Kenya was her first choice. Kenya says that when she felt everyone was against her, Cynthia was the one who stood up for her. She says she was in her feelings and behaved like a jerk (this time meaning as in a person). She says she’s sorry she let Cynthia down. Cynthia says it was important to her and sometimes friends have to do what they don’t feel like doing. She accepts the apology, but I think that was an unnecessary comment.

Phaedra, being the cretin she is, says that she thinks it’s just more bad acting form Kenya. I like this woman less and less every episode.

They have a final toast.

Next week, the ladies have a lingerie photo shoot, Matt wants a wife, and Phaedra’s kids visit their dad in prison.

The Real Housewives of Potomac

Is the season over yet?

I notice Ashley’s voice goes up a notch when she gets excited. This isn’t a good look when doing business.

Karen and her daughter, Raven, are taking a self-defense class. Karen wants her daughter to learn to defend herself since she’s going off to college. About a year prior, Karen was mugged and had her diamond necklace stolen. She says she kept her ring though, since she took it off and slid it into “Never Never Land.” I don’t even want to think about what that means, but I am wondering how she accomplished that during the mugging.

Karen says the job of a parent is never done, so she also bought Raven a hot pink stun gun.

Ashley and Michael are opening a restaurant geared toward Australian fare. She’s looking for an assistant and conducting interviews. When they get to asking the candidates about their knowledge of Australia, it’s pretty much a blank slate across the board. After the interviews, Ashley and Michael discuss the interviewees and they both are leaning toward Jasmine.

Robyn comes to visit Charrisse. Since Charrisse gets “NBA life” (whatever that means), Robyn says she shares a bond with her that she doesn’t with the others. They have some food and wine. Robyn tells Charrisse that her ex-husband might have to take out-of-state work. Charrisse asks if she’s still in love with him. Even though she lives with him, they share a bed and have sex, Robyn says they’re not in a relationship. Okay. Robyn says she thinks she’s going to stay in Potomac if he goes, but if she misses him, that might change.

Charrisse says she’s on the fence about her marriage. She says her husband is a great father, but a lousy husband. She’s feeling she’s at the point where something drastic has to happen. She basically blew him off in a text to which he never responded. She says wants a divorce, and Robyn tells her if he won’t do it, she’ll have to.

Gizelle is having a girls’ night with Karen, who’s hoping to gossip with her instead of about her. Is this the level of etiquette she’s so proud of? They talk about how Ashley had a cash bar at her birthday party, which I have to admit is a bit crass. Gizelle said she walked out without paying because she didn’t know. I’ll have to remember that one for next time. Karen says she wants to school Ashley in how to entertain.

Karen is having a couples dinner. She says it’s BYOM — Bring Your Own Man. Gizelle wonders about the ladies whose husbands work away from home. They discuss Katie making out like crazy with her boyfriend at the birthday party and seem to think she’s “on something.” They sound like my grandmother or Archie Bunker. A storm starts outside and thunder happens every time they try to talk shade. I think God is trying to tell them something.

Ashley’s mom and brother come over. They play a game of pool and she tells them about the other Potomac ladies. Ashley’s mom was a single mother and they’re very close. She recently had to file bankruptcy and I wonder why Ashley didn’t help her out. Oh, okay, it seems like her mother doesn’t want her helping out.

Katie is waiting for Karen at a restaurant and talking to her boyfriend on the phone. She’s nervous because she wants to get her on the host committee for her foundation.

Karen arrives. Karen says something about the PDA at Ashley’s event and Katie apologizes. She asks what Karen thought about the cat theme and Karen says she’s a little old for all that nonsense, and calls it a teeny-bopper party. Karen approaches her about the Rost Foundation. She says she has a month to get a casino night together and needs Karen’s help. She’s looking for donations in the amount of 100K, and asks Karen if she’ll be on the committee, but Karen says she’s booked. And she won’t give up her Rolodex either. Do people still use those? Probably only people who use phrases like teeny-bopper.

Gizelle meets her date, Herman. She’s getting back into the dating pool, and I’m thinking she can do better than this. It’s her second date and I guess his credentials are impressive. They make a toast with water and he gets a little forward. The raw oysters come and Herman made the mistake of thinking they were fried. Although I like them now, I made this same mistake in a restaurant when I was 12. I was totally grossed out once I put the oyster in my mouth. I didn’t want to swallow it, but I didn’t want to spit it out in a restaurant full of people, so I just sat there with it in my mouth until I couldn’t deal anymore and chugged it down.

Gizelle thinks Herman needs a little more pizzazz. I could have told her that. She invites him to the couple’s dinner. He starts talking about it being a third date, but she says it doesn’t count. On top of it he makes the horrible mistake of calling the oysters “clams.” I’m not saying it’s horrible — I do it all the time — but Gizelle seems put off by it.

Katie and Andrew meet Ashley and her husband for a round of golf. Katie says she doesn’t really like the game, but she likes the outfits and driving the cart. Ashley hits the dirt the first time out, but manages to hit the ball on the second try.

The girls have a drink while the guys continue on with the game. Katie tells Ashley about Karen not being able to be on the committee. She tells Ashley that Karen thought the birthday party was for a younger crowd and Ashley says that was kind of ageist. Katie says she likes hanging out with Ashley rather than the old biddies, who aren’t really that old, but act like it.

Karen had matriarchs of the community to help her when she first was getting the hang of big society, and she feels responsible to help Ashley the same way.

Robyn is playing a game of basketball with her ex, Juan, and their kids. She says they’re technically not a couple (seriously, I’d like to know just what they are), so she doesn’t think she wants to bring him to the dinner because they have enough pressure.

Ashley and Michael arrive first for the dinner, then Gizelle with Herman. The rest trickle in. They’re on a docked yacht. Say that three times real fast.

Karen’s husband Ray makes a toast. Michael suggests they go swimming and Ray is all for it, but Karen puts the kibosh on that idea. There’s a lot of cocktail chatter, none of it interesting. Katie tells Gizelle about Karen calling her out about the PDA. Gizelle says it really wasn’t cool, and Katie says she’s sorry and that she’d had too much to drink. I’d be drinking a lot too, if I was around these people. Gizelle says she’ll help with the casino night.

Michael wants to go swimming, and begins to take his shoes and pants off, and Gizelle discourages it. Karen is all like, “we” don’t do this. Is that the royal “we” or is she pregnant? She says she loves what he’s trying to do, but not here. Ashley invites all the ladies to their beach house for a girls’ weekend.

Next week, Gizelle doesn’t have a bed at the beach house, Katie is called out again because no one can drop it, the ladies turn it out at a gay club, and Karen is done with Ashley.