Category Archives: Tyler Perry

January 24, 2018 – Faison Meets Finn, NJ Reunion Wraps & Eddie Seeks Revenge

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Jason asks if Sonny has had any word from Sinclair. Sonny says he’s gotten nothing, but someone is intercepting the emails. Is Jason thinking what he is?

At her insistence, Finn meets Felicia at the MetroCourt. She asks when he’s telling Anna he loves her

Anna asks Sonny for a favor in Robin’s name. Back off PK Sinclair.

Maxie goes to the hospital for her appointment. Kim asks who her uniformed friend is, and Maxie says it’s Officer Shane; she’s in need of extra security. While Kim prepares for her appointment, Nathan joins Maxie. He tells her there’s been no trouble from the landlord or the protesters. She asks why he seems so stressed, and he says there’s been a Faison update. Apparently, he has a brother.

Lulu tells Faison that her husband is a detective. He’s Nathan’s partner, and they must be looking for her. Faison says, excellent. She going to bring his son into his arms. Obrecht tell him to leave her son alone. He asks Lulu if she thought she could outwit him? Look how that turned out. Lulu tells him that he’s making it more difficult than it has to be. She can set up a meeting if he gives her the phone. Obrecht asks if she’s insane, and if she wants Nathan and his family to die. Faison says she used the word “family,” and asks if there’s a grandchild. Obrecht says she was referring to his wife, and he tells her don’t lie to him. Does Nathan have a child? She says, no, not yet.

Maxie asks if Obrecht had two boys, but Nathan says his brother has a different mother. Maxie wonders who are all these women having sex with Faison? She admits she wouldn’t have Nathan, but yikes. She asks where his brother is, and Nathan says his mother gave him up at birth. He was raised by Faison, but hates him, and the feeling is mutual. Maxie asks what Obrecht said about it, but Nathan can’t get in touch with her. He needs more information before he can deal with it. Maxie can’t imagine how Nathan feels; everything he knew and is, is a lie. She tells him no matter how many people claims to be family, the only one that matters is theirs.

Faison says, their first grandchild, adding no congratulations or anything, and Obrecht lied. Lulu says to let her call, and he tells them both to shut up, calling them two pieces of garbage. Obrecht says not to Anna. His obsession is fond of Lulu if hurt. If he hurts her, Anna will never forgive him.

Finn tells Felicia, no appetizers; she’s going right into crazy talk. He’s not in love with Anna. Felicia doesn’t believe him. She’s all about the chase, but it’s gone on too long. Finn asks what she’s talking about, and she tells him to cut the crap. Everyone can see it, but neither one of them will admit it; they’re at a standoff, with no one making the first move. It has to be him. He asks why, and Felicia says Anna is hurt. They all are, but without betraying her confidence, Anna is more complicated than he realizes. She’s dealt with trauma, and he needs to do what she can’t. She tells him to be brave and man up. Tell Anna he loves her or he’ll lose her.

Sonny says someone is intercepting the emails, and Anna says that would be her. She asked him to notify her, but he refused. He says now she shows up asking for a favor? Jason asks why she cares so much, and Anna says she doesn’t care. She doesn’t know him, but she cares about what happens to him because she’s been there. He’s obviously been pushed too far by Faison, and wants to strike back. It’s not a position she envies. Years go by, and you think it’s over, then there he is, telling you he loves you, and all the time torturing you. She starts to tear up. She says there’s no escape, and thinks he feels the same way. Sonny tells her they’re on the same side. He wants to stop Faison from hurting anyone again. Jason needs to do that. They need his son.

Finn knows Felicia means well, but she’s wrong. He and Anna don’t fit. Felicia asks why? Finn says, because, and she tells him that he’ll have to do better than that. He says he’s still struggling with his recovery, and doesn’t know what the future holds. It could be forever, and Anna doesn’t need that uncertainty. Felicia says she’s a WSB agent; uncertainty is a way of life. Finn says that’s another thing. She’s an agent, dealing with guns and bad guys, and he’s in the market o save lives. Felicia thinks it’s the same thing, and Finn says Felicia gave him a B, a measly B. Felicia says it’s a solid B. When they got together, the way he and Anna looked to and spoke about each other, she knew they were faking it, but there was something real underneath. He can come up with a million reasons why not, but it’s up to him to find the one reason why they should be together. They’re both lonely, and they love each other. They’ve found the treasure – loving and being loved in return. She says he’s truly a curmudgeon, but doesn’t think he’s foolish, so do the smart thing. Choose Anna, and she guarantees she’ll choose him back, even though they’re both just as stubborn.

Anna asks why Jason wants Heinrich, and Jason says he was in the clinic because of Klein’s mystery client. Faison ordered him killed, but the traitor kept him alive. Anna says the assumption being they’re the same person, along with PK Sinclair. Sonny says The Severed Branch pissed Faison off so bad, he tried to burn it. Jason says they’re not just the same person; he’s Faison’s son. Anna asks if Jason wants to find out why he was kept alive, and Jason says, yes. Sonny says, but the real reason to draw Faison out is that he orchestrated the program to replace Jason with Drew. They want to know the reason for that. Anna asks if Sonny thinks it’s about him. Sonny doesn’t know, but the easiest way to get rid of him would be to get rid of Jason. Anna tells him to focus on Faison, and she’ll handle Heinrich. Jason says they can’t get to Faison without his son, and Anna says, then what? If they use him as a lure, Faison will kill him. Do they want his blood on their hands after Jason was kept alive because of him? Because of him, Jason isn’t dead; there has to be another way. Sonny says forget about him and Jason, she’s Robin’s mother, and Faison put her through hell, taking Robin away from them for years. No more. He has to go.

Faison says Anna betrayed him, and left him to die. He feels nothing for her. Obrecht says then he won’t care that she’s found love again. He asks with who, and Obrecht says a good man, a world renowned doctor, Hamilton Finn. Faison says he didn’t keep her alive to punish her, but he’s sure she recognizes this. He puts a cannister on the ground and leaves, locking the door behind him. Lulu tries to open it, but can’t.

Kim asks about stress managing, and Maxie says it’s all good, thanks to Nathan. Kim tells her that a good partner is a huge gift, especially with parenting. Being a single parent is tough. She calls Nathan in, and does the ultrasound. Kim says the baby is perfect, but a little shy; she can’t determine the gender, but maybe next time. Maxie reminds her not to tell them, and she says she’ll put it in an envelope like Maxie asked. Maxie says Sam might not have been into her gender cake, but she is, although she did force it on Sam. Kim shows them the screen. Maxie says, we made that, and Nathan says, yeah, we did.

Lulu says, wth? Obrecht tells her it’s carbon sulfate, a lethal gas the DMX created. Their intention was to sell it. Anna thwarted the plan, but Faison escaped. Lulu finds what looks like a dog grooming tool, and cuts Obrecht’s bonds. She asks how old the container is, and Obrecht thinks about twenty-five years. Lulu thinks it can’t still be effective, but Obrecht says if the gas doesn’t kill Lulu, she will.

Finn knocks on Anna’s door, and let’s himself in. He calls to her, and when there’s no answer, he sends a text.

Anna says no one wants Faison handled more than her, but not at the expense of his son. Sonny says he took Robert from her, and took Jason; he’s only going to stop if they stop him. Jason thinks the best what is through Heinrich. He gives Anna his word that he won’t hurt Heinrich. He just wants to meet, and if Heinrich cooperates, he’ll do everything in his power to protect him. Anna gets a text from Finn. It says that he’s waiting for her, and they need to say what they haven’t been able to. She tells Sonny that PK Sinclair wants to meet, but no location is set. She gets another text, and says it’s set now.

Finn flashes back to his banter with Anna, where he told her that he’s the only thing preventing her from putting on a bathrobe and adopting a cat, and they ended up kissing. He hears the door open and close, and turns around to see Faison. Faison points his gun at Finn. I wonder why Anna gets all the cool guys.

Kim tells Maxie and Nathan that everything looks good. Maxie says she can’t with the cuteness. Nathan says it seems real all of a sudden, in the best way. Kim says except for the one scare, the pregnancy is going beautifully. Felicia comes by, and Nathan gives her his spot. Felicia looks at the screen, and says it’s the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen.

Shane tells Nathan that Dante is trying to reach him. Obrecht called an Uber to Anna’s, but wasn’t there when it arrived. No one has seen her since yesterday.

Lulu balks at Obrecht saying it’s her fault. She just got him riled about Anna. Obrecht says he’s always riled about Anna. Lulu was like a child playing checkers with a nuclear device. Lulu says Nathan decided it was the right thing, but Obrecht says it was set in motion by Lulu, and for what? A story to further her career? Congratulations, she got her wish. Now they’re all paying the price. Lulu won’t apologize for trying to put an international criminal in jail. Obrecht says she’s arrogant as well as foolish. She tells Lulu here’s a reality check. Faison made Robin disappear, and did the same to Jason. Lulu thought she’d succeed where Sonny failed. Lulu says she wasn’t thinking, and Obrecht tells her that she kept Faison’s son from him for a reason, at enormous cost to herself. Now it’s for nothing. Lulu says maybe they’re not going to die in here. Obrecht says she can’t warn Nathan. She can’t do anything; it’s over. Lulu says not if they can find an escape.

Anna tells Sonny and Jason that PK will be at the park at 10 pm. Sonny says he’ll be there, and Anna says she will too. Sonny says Jason will meet with him, and he’ll monitor things from a distance. Anna says they’ll drive him off. It needs to be her. She might get him to lower his guard. She promises not to make a move without checking, and tells Sonny it’s better to work with her than against her. Jason says 10 pm, and Sonny says they’re going to find Faison. Anna says when they do… and pauses for a moment. She finishes by telling them to call the authorities.

Faison says Finn must be Anna’s new love. Finn asks who he is, and he introduces himself, saying Anna must have mentioned him. Finn says, not a word. Faison asks how long he’s been seeing Anna, and he says a couple of months, but she doesn’t talk much about her past. If he’s part of it, Finn can’t blame her. Faison says he’s not part of her past; he’s her destiny. He’s known her since she was a kid, and always knew. The more she fights it, the more he’s sure. She’s been his greatest opponent, and she’ll be his. Believe it. Finn tells him people don’t own other people, but Faison says he’s never experienced the love of the soul. Finn says he’s been salivating over her all these years, but it’s never happened. She’s not that into him. She’s smart, kind, and courageous, and no doubt looks for those qualities in a partner. He doesn’t want to be harsh, but she’s out of his league. Faison says, but she’s in his? Finn says he should be so lucky. Faison says his problem is he thinks Finn is a man Anna could fall in love with, but he doesn’t want her too. Does he kill him, or keep him alive and get the upper hand to make Anna do what he wants? Finn rushes Faison.

Felicia introduces herself to Kim. She says the prospect of having a grandchild in their home town has her and Mac excited. The lab calls, and Kim goes to get the sono pictures. Felicia tells Maxie at least she’s not blubbering like Mac when he put together the crib. They also have a glider and a changing table for when the baby spends the night. They’d started reminiscing about when Maxie’s sister was little, and Maxie says she misses Georgie, especially right now. Felicia says she’s with them in spirit. It’s a wonderful time for her. She has an amazing husband, a thriving daughter, and another baby on way that they can spoil rotten.

Nathan tells Maxie that it’s official; they made the perfect baby. Maxie is feeling better after seeing it; everything has been put in perspective. They’ll be fine. His father can’t touch them.

Lulu thinks there’s an entrance to a tunnel in the room. They just have to find it. When they get out, she’ll send Nathan to Anna, which is probably where Faison went. Either way, he’ll get captured. Obrecht helps Lulu look.

Sonny tells Jason that he’s never seen Anna like that. Nothing ever fazed her, and now she’s two seconds away from losing her mind. He says it’s the same look his mom had when Deke would hit her. She’d hear the door open, and freeze. He couldn’t do anything then, but he can now. Anna isn’t going to be living in fear anymore.

Anna sees a cigarette butt outside her door. She picks it up.

Kim gives Felicia a sono picture. Felicia thanks her for taking good care of Maxie. Kim says she’s lucky to have such a good family.

Maxie insists the baby has Nathan’s nose. Nathan says no matter whose nose it has, the baby will be so loved. Nathan gets text has to go back to work, and Maxie gives him one of the pictures.

Obrecht tells Lulu the walls are as secure as Fort Knox. Lulu says there has to be an entrance somewhere. The gas starts to release.

Sonny tells Jason that when Anna turned back, what she said about calling the police wasn’t what she really wanted to say. What she wanted to say was, don’t miss.

Anna goes in, gun drawn. Faison has his gun on Finn. He says, hello, Anna. Lovely to see you.

Sonny tells Jason to line up the shot. Jason says he won’t miss.

Tomorrow, Kiki thanks Griff, Amy visits Maxie, and Faison tells Anna to drop the gun.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey – The Reunion Part Two

When we last left the reunion, Sylvia Miles Crypt-Keeper cock-a-roach Kim D joined the group. Kim tells Teresa, mess with her, and she’ll be back in jail, clink-clink. Teresa gets up, but thinks better of it, saying Kim is lucky she’s on probation. I don’t think I’ve ever used this word in regard to a Housewife or Friend of, but Kim D is repulsive. We flash back to Kim D’s highlights from this season, both on the scene and being talked about. Kim says Teresa wants to fist fight everybody, but Teresa says she wouldn’t give her the satisfaction.

Andy tells us that last season Dolores and Siggy were peacemakers, but not so much this season. They believe they did the right thing by walking in the fashion show, but claim they still defended Teresa. Teresa says they can see Kim’s track record. Kim says Teresa changes friends like underwear, but Dolores says they’ve been friends forever. Since Kim is totally wrong, she says that’s the way she sees it. The fashion show made a whole grand each for the two recipients of the event. Melissa thinks Kim got more out of it than they did, and Kim whines about having to pay for the dinner. Melissa hums circus music. She says Kim likes to stir the pot, and goes for the jugular and talking about people’s families. Kim admits to both pot stirring and going below the belt, and Melissa asks if she realizes she goes too far. She suggests Kim bring it down to a level where children aren’t hurt. Kim calls them all frauds. Teresa says if anyone would look at Kim’s W-2’s and 1099’s, it would be clink-clink for her too. Kim says she has two businesses, and Teresa says one of them is prostitution. Andy sure can pick ‘em.

Andy asks if Teresa is alleging she’s a madam, and Teresa says, yes, a magdum [sic]. Kim says she isn’t, but wouldn’t have a problem with it. Andy says he could kind of see it. Kim says Teresa steals from other people, and says something about Joe #2 that I don’t catch. Melissa tells her be gone, and Teresa says she’s dried up. Andy asks what’s up with Siggy. Siggy says Teresa has a right to be angry, but the county is small, and when you’re not getting along, it’s hurtful. Melissa says she can’t have her cake and eat it too. Andy asks Siggy how she’d feel if Kim said Michael was cheating. Siggy says she would be devastated, and hope the girls would have her back. Dolores says from now on, she doesn’t want to know anything. Kim swears she’s not a troublemaker, but thinks some of the things they say are evil. We almost say goodbye, but Teresa says Danielle didn’t get to say anything.

Danielle asks why Kim didn’t intervene at the fashion show a million years ago, when Danielle got her hair pulled? She asks if they were friends for real, or did Kim just want to get on the show? Kim says Danielle got uptight about things she should have let go, and that’s how the friendship ended. Kim leaves. Siggy talks about trying to set her up, but says Kim can’t get over her ex.

Siggy has two more books coming up; one about divorce, and another about bullying geared to children. The look on Margaret’s face is priceless. We flash back to Siggy’s world. Andy asks why she uses Michael’s last name when she talks about him – something I’ve been dying to know – but she just likes the sound of it. She talks about moving to Boca now that Josh is gone. She’s working less, and spending more time with Michael. Andy asks about the pellets, and she says she hasn’t had a hot flash in eight months and her sex life is great. She also encourages anyone with a credit card to have plastic surgery. Margaret says her advice is valid, but wishes she’d take some of it. Siggy says she practices what she preaches, but with Margaret, it’s a toxic situation. She claims Margaret doesn’t like her. Siggy asks how many lawsuits Margaret has going on, and acts like business bankruptcy is a big deal. Andy mentions the recent lawsuit where Margaret was accused of stealing a whale design. Margaret explains it’s common in her industry.

Andy mentions what great relationships the ladies have with their families. We see clips of Marge Sr., Teresa’s father, and the other parents. Margaret calls her mom a sex kitten. Andy suggests Marge Sr. hook up with Teresa’s dad, but Melissa says she’s way too modern for him. Teresa thinks he should find a rich woman to take care of him. Dina (from previous seasons) tweets that she loves Marge Sr. Dina’s home invasion is discussed. I’d forgotten about that. It was horrible. She’s lucky she’s not dead. Teresa says it’s still being investigated, and I get creeped out all over again.

The Franks are examined next. We flash back to Frank Sr. coming back home, and Frankie going off to college, as well as clips regarding Dolores’s absent boyfriend. Andy asks what’s going on with that. She says she and David are still together, and seeing how things go. A viewer questions her relationship with Frank. Andy asks if they’re getting back together, but she says they’re not apart. They are not, however, having sex.

Andy says while everyone else welcomed Danielle, Dolores thought she was back for revenge. We flash back to their altercations, including Dolores calling her a crazy scumbag, and accusing her of being on drugs. Dolores says she made up a story that Dolores said Teresa just cared about money, although Danielle remembers it vividly. She claims Dolores was basically bringing her up to speed, going through what was happening with each person. She says it wasn’t that big of a deal, but she thought Teresa needed to know what she’d said. Dolores asks why she would leave Siggy out. Well, because they’re joined at the hip. Danielle doesn’t think she had ill intentions.

Andy asks what proof Dolores has that Danielle is on drugs. She has none, but says Danielle seems off, and is maybe using Xanax or something. Danielle says she’s never done any such thing. She gets they don’t like her, but shut up and stop calling her names. Dolores immediately calls her a skank. Danielle tells her to STFU. Dolores also calls Danielle a professional victim, which is funny, since that seems to be Siggy’s role.

They take a break. and backstage, Danielle calls Dolores a piece of sh*t. Dolores says she loves to get Danielle “to that point.” Teresa tells Danielle it’s not true, so don’t even pay attention. Danielle calls Dolores a bully, and wants the camera off.

We move on to the Italy trip. Margaret says they sucked the life out of Italy, and she’s not sure if they’d be welcomed back. Melissa just wanted some authentic pasta and wine with the girls, but it didn’t happen. Next, we see how one comment changed a friendship forever, and stroll down Hitler Memory Lane, with Margaret using Hitler in an analogy, and Siggy deciding she must be anti-Semitic. Margaret says she was in shock. The comment was actually the opposite. She wasn’t calling Kim D “Hitler,” just making a point. She says it’s a common analogy, and she’s never had that problem before. Siggy said nothing at the time, and waited until they got to Italy to pull out her accusation. She says Kim D was assassinating Teresa and Melissa’s character, and she doesn’t just judge her friends by how they treat her, but also how they treat others. Siggy, who can barely sit in her seat, says she can’t do this. Andy asks if anyone knew what anti-Semitic meant. Everybody pretends they did, except for Teresa, who says nothing. Andy tries to ask Danielle a question, but Siggy won’t shut up. When Danielle points out she’s trying to answer, Siggy huffs and puffs, and says, oh, it’s her moment. Andy asks what was going on when she went nuts at dinner? Danielle says she hated seeing Margaret crying and upset. She’s not anti-Semitic, and has raised Jewish children. Margaret asks Andy what he thought, and he says he didn’t think the analogy was out of line. Siggy says her father said the name should never be spoken, and Margaret says she failed to mention Margaret had a Jewish husband and children, and even Siggy’s father thought she went too far. Siggy starts pointing her finger, and saying, shame on you. Margaret says Siggy wanted to hate her, and that was that; she’s sorry she made Siggy unhinged. Siggy says she’ll be going back to her fabulous life, and Margaret points out how she’s always talking about how much she has. Surprisingly, Andy jumps in, saying, he’s so on the other side with this. Not to take away from Siggy’s feelings, but he’d called his parents, who also didn’t think it was offensive. Siggy says the name should never be brought into casual conversation. End of story. It’s how she feels, and she doesn’t give a sh*t what anyone else feels. Alrighty then. At the beginning of the season, I thought, poor thing, she’s having a difficult menopause, but by the end, I realized she’s just insane.

Andy asks Danielle if she’s glad she came back. Shockingly, she says she is.

In the final moments, Andy wraps up season 8 with the rose and thorn thing; what’s the best and worst of the season for each of them. Dolores says the worst was her friendship with Teresa being questioned, and the best was that it didn’t break the friendship. Siggy says the pellets were the best, and fighting with Margaret was the worst. Margaret agrees that their fighting was the worst, and says she thinks it ruined everything for everybody. Andy wonders if that will ever change, or are they just not meant to be friends? Margaret says she puts things behind her quickly, but Siggy feels how she feels. Siggy says everything is timing, and she doesn’t bounce back quickly when she’s hurt. Andy thinks this means never say never, and says look at Teresa and Danielle. They’re friends, even thought it took eight years and “going away.” Our favorite jail euphemism. Siggy is visibly uncomfortable, and possibly embarrassed. I would be if practically everyone in the world told me I was wrong. Melissa says her thorn was watching the pain of the family when her mother-in-law passed away, and her rose was getting envy back on its feet all on her own. Teresa worst was losing her mom; she can’t believe she still standing. She says going away was nothing in comparison. She’d go twenty more times to have her back. It was the worst thing ever. I get seriously choked up, since I can understand her grief. She says the best part was watching her daughters. Since her mother’s been gone, there hasn’t even been a dish in the sink. She’s proud of them.

Andy says it was a long, but memorable season that started with a cake, so it’s only fitting they end with a cake. Melissa hopes no one throws it. It’s a replica of the one Siggy had made for Melissa’s birthday. They promise to eat like adults, but Teresa puts some on Andy’s face, and asks if she can lick it off. I’m not kidding. He nixes that idea, and says Joe #1 better come home soon.

And New Jersey is out.

Next time, The Real Housewives of New Jersey: Secrets Revealed

If Loving You is Wrong

Kelly finds out Travis is dead. Lushion is like, Kelly… Tony Isaacs says let her talk. He asks if Lushion is her counsel, but he says just a friend. Tony tells him to go. Lushion tells Kelly that he’ll make some calls, and don’t say a word.

Tony asks what happened, but Kelly wants her lawyer. Tony says she’s going to jail then. She asks if she has to go to jail if she talks, and he says she can talk to him or her lawyer. She starts to talk about Travis being at the window, but thinks better of it. She tells Tony that her lawyer’s name is Ian, and he tells her they’re trying to help; they’re friends here. She asks if they’re the same friends who wouldn’t listen about him stalking her. She refuses to say anymore, and he tells her it makes her look guilty. Kelly says she knows her rights, and she wants her lawyer. Tony tells her in the meantime, she gets a jail cell. She freaks a little, and backs away.

Tony accuses Lushion of coaching Kelly. Lushion says she knows her rights, and Tony says she knows how to wield a knife too. Maybe he meant to say that, but I think Tony is confusing the cases. She shot Travis. She’s accused of stabbing Ramsay. Lushion says her lawyer is Ian, but tony says not anymore. Lushion says Tony has been known to lie, but Tony says he’s been known to interrogate. Lushion says Travis was bad news, but Tony says he read both of their reports and it doesn’t look good for Kelly. Lushion tells him to look closer; there’s more to it. Tony tells Lushion to let him help Kelly, but Lushion says he can’t, and asks what church he goes to. Tony says none, and Lushion asks what about his wife? Tony says Lushion has done his homework. She goes to Travis’s father’s church. He’s biased. Travis has been harassing Kelly and destroying her life. Tony says he needs her to tell him that. Lushion says she will when her lawyer gets there.

Brad sits on his porch. He strolls over near Randal’s house. Randal sticks his head out the window, and asks what he’s looking at? Brad says he’s on his side of the yard. Randal says he’ll call the cops, and Brad tells him to go ahead. They both go back to their respective corners. Inside, Brad tells Alex that she lied to him. She’s like, what? He repeats it. He says she was over there to see Randal. She says no, but Brad says that’s what Randal told him. Alex says she wasn’t and Brad knows Randal. Brad says she knows him; he’s just learning. Alex says he should believe her; she’s his wife. He says that didn’t mean anything in the past, and she tells him not to go there. Brad asks how Randal would know that he left, and Alex says maybe he looked through the window. Brad says he’s trying, and she says she’s telling the truth. The baby starts to cry, and she says she’s not doing it; it’s upsetting the baby. Brad asks who’s baby, and she asks if this is how it’s going to be. He says he doesn’t think he can do this. He knew it was going to be hard, but he might have to leave. Alex tells him that it’s confusing for the kids, but he doesn’t know if he can trust her given the circumstances. Alex says she didn’t go over there, but he admits he doesn’t believe her. He goes back outside, and we see the cute, albeit nameless, baby.

Esperanza asks if Lushion talked to Kelly. Stephen wants to make eyes at her, but asks Lushion how it’s going. Esperanza leaves, and Lushion says not so good; how about the two of them? Stephen acts , and Lushion laughs and asks if he’s going to lie. Last night he was eye-sexing at the crime site, all cool on his motorcycle, and now he’s not talking to her? Stephen asks if they took Kelly in, and Lushion says she’s in a cell. He asks if Stephen knows a lawyer; Ian backed out. Stephen says he’ll make some calls.

Esperanza comes back, and asks what’s going on with Kelly? Lushion says they arrested her; Travis died. He’s going to make some calls. Esperanza offers to help, but he says he has it. He leaves, and Stephen says, dinner? Esperanza says her friend just got arrested, and he’s asking her on a date? He asks if he’s being insensitive, and she says he’s being a pr*ck, and walks out. Eddie comes in, and Stephen says he doesn’t want to be what she already had.

Eddie says Stephen thinks he’s funny. Stephen thinks Esperanza likes him. Eddie thinks if he catches Stephen over at her place, he’s going to kick his ass. Stephen says Eddie is a crazy SOB, but so is he. Eddie says he has no idea. Stephen says Eddie’s crazy is fueled by cocaine and chaos; his is controlled.  He asks if Eddie noticed the rest of the station looking at him funny. Last night, he was the toast in some guy’s toaster. Eddie tells Stephen to stay out of his face. Stephen says Eddie is funny; he thinks he scares him. He thinks he’s a tough guy. Eddie tells him, take a walk, but Stephen says he’s not going anywhere, and tells Eddie to get his ass out. Go to the station down the street. They don’t want him there anymore.

Marcie pulls into Brad’s driveway, and calls Ian. She’s got the contract, and he asks her to come by the office. She asks if Larry is going to be there, and he says no. She asks Brad why he’s sitting there, and he says he’s waiting on her. He asks about her car, and she’s getting a rental. It’s totaled, and they’re going to replace it. Brad calls Randal a bastard, but she says his insurance will go up too, since his name was on it. He says Randal was shouting at him about the baby. He apologizes for Alex, and says she shouldn’t have told him. Marcie tries to tell him it wasn’t Alex, but he says she’s sick of her lying. Marcie asks how he knows, and he says Randal told him. Marcie says don’t believe him. She asks what Alex said, and Brad tells her that Alex denied it, but who else could have told him? He’s thinking about leaving, and asks if it’s okay to come back to the apartment. Marcie says of course. She’s missed him, and says it was a mistake to throw him out. He says at least she didn’t tell Randal it was his child. Marcie says she fired the divorce lawyer; it’s a long story. Brad gets in the car with her.

Lushion calls Ian, and asks what’s going on? He thought Ian would be there helping Kelly. Ian says he can’t. His partner and boss was adamant. Lushion asks if he’s going to leave her hanging, and he says he texted a new lawyer’s number. Lushion says Kelly doesn’t get to have her phone in jail, and Ian says he’ll send it to Lushion. Lushion doesn’t like the idea, but Ian insists he’s good. He tells Lushion what he’s done for Kelly so far is pro bono. He says he’s sorry, but Lushion says he’s not. It’s sad and wrong, and a a good woman needs a good attorney. He asks if Ian will at least let her know personally, and Ian agrees, apologizing again.

Kelly paces in the cleanest, neatest cell ever. Esperanza comes by. Kelly says she needs her lawyer, but Esperanza says he’s not there. Lushion is handling it, and it will be okay. Kelly says he came all the way to see her at Natalie’s last night. Esperanza tells her that she’ll pick up Justice from school. Kelly worries she won’t get out, and says she’s not in the wrong. She knows she shouldn’t have shot him. Esperanza tells her not to talk about it in there, and don’t talk to the other prisoners about it. Kelly starts to freak, and Esperanza tells her to maintain her composure. Esperanza says he provoked her, and they’ll figure it out, but she has to calm down. This is also the quietest jail ever.

Marcie comes by Ian’s office. He tells her Larry is in court. She tells him the inspections are, and the closing date has been moved up. He says hopefully it will be done before his kids get there for the summer. He gives her the paperwork, saying it’s signed and notarized, and it’s all good. She says he made her life easier. He says now the hard part; have drinks and dinner with him. He won’t take no for an answer. She says she’ll text her address, and she’ll bring the keys. He says he already has them. Marcie says he didn’t need her, and could have saved the commission. He says some things are worth the investment. She says whatever he thinks he’s getting, she hopes it’s worth it. Marcie wants to jet before Larry gets back, but ugh! Larry comes in. Ian says they were just talking about him. He asks if they were cursing him out, and Marcie says, you’d better believe it. Larry apologizes, and says what if he gets Randal to sign the papers. Then she can fire him. He glides out, and Marcie says she can’t stand him, but she likes him. Ian says that’s how most of them feel.

Eddie asks Lushion if he’s good, and Lushion says he’s busy. Eddie knows Lushion didn’t have to do what he did, and thanks him. Lushion says, don’t mention it, but Eddie says he has to. Lushion is a good guy. Eddie says he called so many people, and Lushion is the only one who picked up. That’s funny, since I could have sworn he’d only called Esperanza, and even Lushion hung up twice before talking to him. Lushion asks where Andrew is, and Eddie says Rusty probably did something to him. Lushion says he doesn’t trust Eddie, or like him. He doesn’t trust what he says, and he was just doing his job. He doesn’t give a damn about him. Eddie asks what he’s putting in the report, and Lushion asks if that’s what this is really about. He’s writing what happened, and wouldn’t have to do that if Eddie hadn’t shot at them. He wouldn’t have done anything. What grown men do is their business. Eddie says he was in the backyard, and they drugged him. He says maybe they had a laugh, but everyone knows who has the last word around there. Lushion tells him that Larry is well-connected, and to leave them alone. Eddie says all the more reason to take his ass out. Lushion says not to call him; he won’t be a part of Eddie’s crimes. Eddie says he’s not committing crimes; he’s trying to take out the cartel. They’ll have to agree to disagree, but he thanks Lushion from the bottom of his heart. He shakes Lushion’s hand, and Lushion asks where Andrew is. Eddie says there will be a time Lushion needs him, and he can count on Eddie. He’ll be there.

Larry goes to Randal’s house. Randal says he fired him, but Larry says he needs to sign the lawsuit papers. And something else; the divorce papers. Randal says he’s not doing that. Larry says he will if he wants to sue, but Randal says he’ll find another lawyer. Larry says he’ll do it for free. Randal thinks Larry feels guilty about letting it slip that Marcie is pregnant. Larry says he can make Brad’s life miserable, and Randal wonders why he wants it so bad. Larry asks why Randal doesn’t want to let it go? Randal says he just doesn’t. Larry says he wants the last bit of control, but Randal says it’s not about control. He wants her to suffer. Now that she’s pregnant, he wants her stressed the hell out. Larry says he’s not suing Brad, and calls Randal a piece of work. Randal says he is, and Larry loves it. Larry says just because he loves pain and suffering, doesn’t mean he likes to beg. He tells Randal to sign the lawsuit papers. Randal looks them over, and signs them. They shake hands. Larry jokingly (I think) says, love you, on his way out the door.

Larry gets in his car. He calls the office, leaving a message that he’s sending over some documents. Eddie pops up from the backseat, and holds a gun to Larry’s head. Larry asks what he wants, and Eddie tells him to drive.

Next time, Travis’s family holds a press conference, Esperanza apologizes to Lushion, Eddie beats up Larry, and Alex slaps Randal.

👯 What is up with these reboots of 90s sitcoms all of a sudden? Have we run out of ideas?

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Faison & The Severed Branch

January 23, 2018 – He’s Ba-a-ack, Candace Turns the Wrong Trick, Teddi Gives Thanks & Some Random TV Thoughts

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

At the MetroCourt, Ned tells Laura that he hates to see her drop out of the race. Lulu says at least he doesn’t have to write a concession speech now. Ned tells Olivia that her husband is going to be the next mayor of Port Charles.

Alexis and Molly go to Charlie’s. Julian asks how TJ and Kiki did on their exams. Molly says they probably did great. Alexis says it’s even more impressive, considering TJ had to suffer through their apartment building’s conditions. Molly thinks Alexis should  pick up the torch from Laura, and run for mayor. Julian thinks it’s a great idea.

Anna talks to Robert, making sure the emails from PK Sinclair will be rerouted to her, and Sonny won’t know. She goes to the station interrogation room. Dante and Nathan are dressed in their blues, since they’re going out to help with the protests on Charles Street. Nathan is tacking up pictures of all the people Faison might target. He tells Anna he’s still trying to wrap his head around Faison being his father. She says if it’s any consolation, there’s no resemblance. Dante says they’re waiting for him to make the first move, but wonders where he’ll strike next and who’s his next target.

At Aurora, Lulu tells Peter she knows she’s supposed to go through the proper channels, but her article went viral, and now she’s being lobbed softballs like covering the cat show. She wants to pitch directly to him. She says if she’s right, Faison is hiding on Spoon Island.

Finally, we see him. Faison tells Obrecht to shut up. He says they’re on the island, and she can scream as much as she wants, but no one will hear. I swear, it looks like he’s trying not to laugh, and I’m so excited, I can barely type.

At the MetroCourt, Jordan tells TJ sorry that she’s working so much, but it will help with his med school bills. TJ says he’s going to pay his own way, but Jordan says they’ll see what he says once he gets the bill. She tells him that she called for special deployment to supervise the protest. He asks what about the power outage and the fake gas leak. She says if she finds that it’s harassment, the law will come down on them like a ton of bricks. Ned and Olivia approach. Ned makes small talk, and says he’ll put their brunch on his tab. Jordan says no thanks. It’s not appropriate for her to accept a gift from a candidate. She and TJ leave. Olivia says that was smart of Jordan. Ned says he’s not the enemy. Once he takes office, he’ll be the mayor the city needs.

Molly can’t believe it, but she and Julian are on the same page. Alexis says she can’t hear her over the Seven Seals of the Apocalypse opening at the same time. She tells them that she’s a lawyer, not a politician. Julian and Molly try to talk her into it. Molly points out that Ned’s wife is the poster child for the public breastfeeding case that Alexis won. Alexis repeats General Sherman’s words, saying if nominated, she will not run, and if elected, she will not serve. Julian says they’re at war, and the neighborhood is fighting for its life.

Lulu tells Peter that she used to live at Windemere, and there are many places to hide, like secret passageways and catacombs. Her brother owned it most of her life, and she spent a lot of time there, and knows a lot of them. Peter asks what if Faison is still there? Lulu says not only can they take down a psychopath, it will boost the publication into the stratosphere.

Faison tells Obrecht she lied to him, and not to make it worse. All the years she claimed to worship him, she never said she’d had his son. She says she thought it best, and he tells her, no more lies. He asks why she thinks he brought her out here? She says he must have found her at Anna’s house, but he doesn’t want to talk about Anna. She’s dead to him.

Anna says Faison has the uncanny ability to anticipate what others thinking, and is always one step ahead. Nathan says the only reason he did the article was to draw him out. Dante looks at the photos, saying Obrecht kept him a secret, he’s still obsessed with Anna, and he orchestrated the memory switch between Jason and Drew, but they don’t know why. Anna says there should be another person there. They have no photo or description, but there’s one other person he’s targeting. Jordan has walked in, and asks, who? Anna says his other son.

Julian says he might have a terrible reputation, but he’s a legit small businessman now. These are his streets, and the people are his customers. Keeping them in their homes isn’t just the right thing; it’s good for business. TJ comes in and tells them that the apartment building has been padlocked, and the property condemned. Alexis says they should have received a notice from the Board of Health. TJ says all their stuff is still in there, and Molly says some of it can be replaced, but what about their gifts and mementos? TJ says it’s not like they’re homeless, but what about the other people? Julian says they’re going to lose their homes unless someone fights for them.

Peter tells Lulu that she has an editor. Lulu says her editor thinks the piece on Nathan was a fluke. Peter says anyone can write about a criminal and make it exciting, not so much a cat show. Lulu says he needs to tell her editor that he has faith in her, and do it before Faison claims another victim. She says Valentin is out of town, and it’s the perfect time. Peter says the police call that trespassing, and breaking and entering. Lulu tells him that she and Valentin share a daughter, and he asks if it was a wild, drunk night. She says it’s a long, complicated story, but if Charlotte left something there, she’d just be being a good mom to go looking for it. While she’s there, she could be compelled to explore. He tells her that Faison didn’t become the most wanted by being stupid. Lulu says the cops will be the ones to bust him, but they have to find him first. Maybe he left a trail of breadcrumbs, and with permission, she can follow them.

Obrecht doesn’t believe Anna is dead to Faison, and says Anna despises him. He must realize she’ll turn him in. Even now, Obrecht would do anything for him. He tells her to give him back the years he never had with his son. She says she misspoke. She can give him anything but that. He tells her to either help him or he’ll kill her. She tells him to go ahead, but leave Nathan alone. He wants to know about his son, and she says he’s nothing like either of them; he’s good.

Nathan says he has a brother? Anna says a half-brother according to Obrecht. His name is Heinrich. Obrecht came over super drunk and talkative. Jordan asks why Anna didn’t tell her, but Anna says she needed it confirmed. She just talked to Sonny, who discovered an unfinished novel about a son obsessed with destroying his father. They think Heinrich wrote it using the penname of PK Sinclair. Nathan puts a blank page up alongside the photos, saying, my brother.

Outside Charlie’s, Ned tells Olivia that he doesn’t want to scrounge for votes today. She says even if no one showed up at the polls, he’d still win. He thanks her for being beside him, but she says if she disagrees with anything or thinks he’s being an ass, she’ll let him know. She tells him to turn on the charm, and convince the doubters. They go into Charlie’s. Julian asks if “Ted” would like a table for two outside. Alexis says the last time Ned was there, it got testy. He promised a clean campaign before getting sidetracked, and Ned says he comes in peace. Since Laura is out, he’s the de facto mayor, and as such, he’d like to rise above their petty differences. Measure A is still on the ballot, and he’d like to form a special commission to oversee the Charles Street development. He’d also like Alexis to chair it.

Faison ties up Obrecht. She tells him that Nathan is a detective, and it’s his job to arrest him; he has no other choice. She begs him to do what he wants with her, but leave Nathan alone. He says he already did what he wanted with her, and because of it, they have a son. When he gets what he wants, he won’t need her anymore. He tells her to sit tight and relax.

Nathan tells Anna that his mother is a control freak; she never gets sloppy drunk. Why would she come to Anna? Anna says she’s terrified of Faison. Jordan tells them she caused a ruckus, and the neighbors called the police, but by the time she got there, Obrecht was gone.  Nathan asks how they know she’s okay, and Anna tells him that she got a text. Dante asks how his father got involved. Anna says the situation isn’t ideal, but Sonny wants to be involved. Jordan asks how that’s going, and Anna says she’s working with him, and they’ll leave it at that. Anna leaves, and Dante asks if Jordan bought that. She says, not one bit.

Peter says Lulu has a nose for news, and a lot of guts, even when sane people are saying to drop it. She asks if that’s what he’s going to tell her editor. Peter says her editor gives her the assignments, but what she does on her own time is her business. Whatever she chooses to do, be careful. His phone rings, and he tells her to promise she’s not going to do anything crazy. She smiles, and leaves. It’s Anna on the phone, and Peter asks how he can help her. She says she realizes they haven’t met, but would like a minute of his time.

Alexis wonders why Ned doesn’t campaign to preserve the area, rather than knocking it down. Ned says it’s an area in progress, and thinks it will benefit he city. Molly says they were locked out due to a gas leak that’s not real, and they’re not going down without a fight. Olivia says maybe they don’t need one. Alexis appreciates his offer, but she can’t consider it unless he discusses the elephant in the room. The giant elephant that covers 90,000 square feet when the arena gets built. She asks if he thought he was going to slip it past the voters without them noticing.

Nathan calls Obrecht and leaves a message. Jordan thinks she’s probably still sleeping it off. Dante says no one has seen anyone matching Faison’s description, but Jordan says he can change his appearance. Nathan wonders what if he never left Port Charles?

Peter says it’s an honor to meet Anna; she has quite a reputation in Port Charles. Anna says Nathan gave the interview in hopes of drawing Faison out. He hasn’t taken the bait, and wonders if Peter would be interested in a follow up story. He asks how she knows they’re not working on one already. She says what about a piece, stating an unnamed WSB source claims Faison is locked in a life and death fight with his son? Peter says he and Nathan have never met, but Anna isn’t talking about Nathan. She says another son is out there. He asks how she knows that, but she says it’s classified. He wonders how the article would flush Faison out, and she tells him they’ll include a clue leading to the son’s location. Peter says they’ll basically be writing something false to lure him in. Anna thinks just this once, it would be fine, but he says that’s where the trouble starts. He knows about justice, but also about ethics, and he’s not compromising for her or anyone.

Obrecht struggles against her bonds. Lulu walks in. Once again using a Star Trek transporter to get there.

Alexis wonders how Ned thought he could sneak something large enough to hold a hockey team past the voters, who will be footing the bill. Ned says corporate naming rights will help with the cost, but she says the taxpayers won’t see a penny. Running it will also cost money, and venues are known for skipping on utility bills. Clearly, someone is needed to speak for the people. Ned tells her that their voices will be heard, and she wonders how, over wrecking balls and jackhammers? Ned says they’re not looking to get rich; he can afford to do what’s right. Some things are coming down, but good things are going up. Life and progress are about change. They’ll thrive, and people and businesses will have a Charles Street they can be proud of. Alexis says they’re already proud of it . They want it restored and revitalized, not redeveloped. He tells her that unless she chairs the committee, it will be a done deal, but she says, no.

Anna tells Peter there’s nothing fake about the story. Faison does have another son; it’s a fact. That the son is determined to bring him down is also a fact. Peter says he needs proof to protect the paper. She says it’s not like they’re going to get sued for slander, but he says he wouldn’t be surprised. Actually, neither would I. He needs to verify that they’re doing the right thing. Anna says public safety is more important than the paper’s integrity. They’ll be held up as heroes. Peter says, and no one will believe anything else they say. She thought he wanted to help, and he says if he gets verifiable information, they’ll jump on it. She says it’s about shedding the light on truth using deception. They’ll be deceiving a dangerous criminal. They get their man, he gets his scoop, everybody wins except Faison. Peter tells her he’s not compromising the integrity of the paper. She asks what about Drew, who lost all of his memories? He’s the co-owner of Aurora. Peter says if she wants to go above his head, that’s fine, but in the meantime, he’s running the company to the best of his ability. Anna doesn’t believe he really wants to help, and asks why? He doesn’t know what she means, and tells her good day. When she’s gone, he ponders. Rumor has it, he’s the other son.

Nathan tells Dante he has a father from hell, and a brother who’s a chip off the old block. Dante says he hates Faison; how bad can he be? Jordan tells Nathan that she has round the clock surveillance on Maxie. Dante says Lulu has done her first and last story on Faison.

Obrecht tells Lulu to hurry; he could be back at any moment. Lulu says the knots are complicated, and Obrecht tells her to find something sharp to cut them. She can’t find anything, and decides to call Dante. Too late. Faison takes the phone out of her hand. He says if she wants a story, she’s got one

Ned tells Alexis sorry they don’t see eye to eye, and she says he sounds like a politician. He says opinions and suggestions are always welcome. She tells him it’s not a suggestion; it’s a political platform. He asks whose? He’s running unopposed. She says, not anymore. She’s officially running for mayor.

Anna sees an email from PK Sinclair. It says, ready to meet tonight.

Nathan leaves another message for Obrecht, saying he’s worried and to text him. He needs to know she’s okay. Jordan says Faison has evaded capture for years, and has to know they’re looking for him. Whatever brought him to Port Charles, he’s not leaving empty handed.

Faison tells Lulu thanks for the article, and Obrecht says, see what hell she unleashed? He tells Lulu that she should have stayed out of it. Now what is he supposed to do with her?

Tomorrow, unless I have a heart attack from all the excitement, Maxie asks what’s wrong, Felicia wants Finn to tell Anna that he loves her, and Anna asks Sonny for a favor.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Hanna says Benny doesn’t learn. He tells her that Veronica was in an accident. She says that doesn’t explain why he was holding the snake by the tail, and tells him to stay away. She wonders why he won’t listen. She says they just buried the baby, and she’s not burying him. She asks if he’s still sleeping with her, but he swears he’s not. She says Veronica is dangerous. He says he and Mitch just happened to be there and asks why she’s at the hospital. She tells him that she had to go to the morgue for Quincy Jr’s things, and shows him the letter. God please help grandma to stop yelling at mommy and help mommy to be a better person and take care of me. Hanna asks where Candace is, and Benny says the Artisian. Hanna wants to show it to her, but Benny says she’s not in a good place. Hanna says she never is. He asks her to think about it, but she says she’s not thinking about anything, and to leave Veronica alone. She never actually says Veronica’s name, but calls her “that woman.”

Hanna asks Benny what room she’s in, but he doesn’t want to say. He tells her if things get bad, Veronica can help him. She says Veronica won’t help anyone but herself. She’ll bury him, and not think twice. She doesn’t get why he won’t listen. The nurse comes out, and says Veronica is asking for him, but he says he’s busy. Hanna asks what’s going on. He says Veronica just needs somebody, and Hanna suggests she ask for her husband, but remembers he won’t have anything to do with her either. Mitch asks if Benny is leaving, and Hanna says he is. Mitch says he’ll catch up with Benny later.

At the Artisian’s bar, man asks if he can buy Candace a drink, and she compliments his watch. She orders a drink, and asks him to hand over his credit card to the bartender. She asks what he wants, and he says to be nice to a beautiful young lady. She says time is money, and he’s like, oh, okay. He says a beautiful woman like her sitting alone at a bar says a lot. She asks what it says, and he tells her that she’s working. She tells him it says she’s expensive. She asks what he does, and he tells her that he’s a truck driver, but she doesn’t buy it. He asks what she does, and she says make men like him very happy. She says to meet her in an hour or get lost. He calls her a mean one. She tells him to call his wife and say good night, since he’ll be busy, and he says yes ma’am.

Charles and Landon have a drink in the hotel room. Landon says Charles will make a lot of money when he gets out of office with book deals and speaking engagements. His popularity is off the charts already. They toast to the voters. Charles gets another drink, and calls Landon a lightweight when he doesn’t want one. Landon asks about the Army. Charles didn’t see combat, but he learned discipline. He needed to change his life, and get away from a girl. Landon says he probably has a crazy effect on all women. They’re all over him, and they all want to be the First Lady. Charles says he’s not into any of them, and doesn’t like to mix business with pleasure. Landon says he doesn’t do it, but it could be okay with someone with as much to lose who could keep secrets. Charles says don’t let him find out he’s running around with one of these women, and Landon says he’ll never have to worry about that. Charles decides to turn in. Landon watches as he takes off his shirt and flops on the bed.

The DA calls for Jeffrey, who’s taken out of lockup and brought to the interrogation room. George introduces himself. He wants to chat about Jeffrey’s case. Jeffrey says he wants a lawyer, and he’s not talking. George says he’s just curious why his mother would give him up like a tossed salad. Jeffrey isn’t saying anything, except that his dad is his lawyer. George tells him that his mother said it was her, but Jeffrey says she lied. George wonders if she’s getting back at him for telling Jennifer he’d testify. He asks if Jeffrey knows Judge Marsh. When he says no, George says he knows her husband, and asks if he isn’t sleeping with him. Jeffrey wants his lawyer. George says his mother was in an accident. Jeffrey asks if she’s okay, but George doesn’t know. She was in a car that flipped over, along with his fiancé. George asks if his fiancé knows he’s having an affair. Veronica seemed excited about it, but he told Jennifer he was gay, and she was making him live a lie. George asks why his lawyer’s not there? Jeffrey says he called, but doesn’t know. George says they’ll give him another phone call, and lets him go back.

Erica compliments David on the dinner. He says sorry it was on the floor, but she thinks it was romantic. They talk about furniture, and he asks if she’ll help him decorate. She says what if they get to know each other and find out they don’t really care for one another? He thinks they’re past that, and it’s not going to happen. She thinks she should just leave, but he says, and go where? She doesn’t know. Wherever she goes, he’ll find her. Her sister is the only family she has. He tells her to stay there with him. She agrees, and they toast to themselves. He kisses her. He’s going back to his condo to get his furniture, and tells her to stay there. She tells him the police are at the front door.

It’s Justin, who tells David that his son told him to get in touch, since his calls were going to voicemail. Jeffrey needs his help. He’s in jail because Veronica had him arrested for Quincy’s murder. David thanks him, and goes back inside. He asks Erica if she’s okay; she’s shaking. She says her ex is an officer. David says it was about his son, and he has to take care of something. He’ll leave her the keys and call her when he’s on the way back. Outside, he leaves a message for Veronica, telling her she went too far this time, and answer the damn phone.

Justin’s phone rings. It’s Wyatt calling Jeffrey’s phone. Wyatt asks if it’s that damn cop, and says to put Jeffrey on the phone. Justin tells him to stop calling, and Wyatt says the jealous thing is ridiculous. Justin says call Jeffrey again, and he’ll bash Wyatt’s head in. Justin hangs up, and Wyatt calls again. He asks who Justin thinks he is, and Justin says he’s coming over to show him. Wyatt calls back a third time, and gets voicemail. Wyatt leaves a message asking where Jeffrey is, and why that thing is answering his phone.

Derek arrives at Kathryn’s house. He tells her that she doesn’t owe him anything for Hanna’s sink; there was a loose ring causing the clog. She has a couple of small jobs for him, and asks if he met Hanna. He wonders what she wants, and realizes she’s playing matchmaker, but Kathryn insists she’s not. He asks if she created the clog in the sink. She ignores that, and asks what he thought. Derek says Hanna seems like a nice lady. She wants to give him Hanna’s number, but Derek says to give Hanna his number. Kathryn says Hanna is a traditional southern woman, and he has to go after her. He says between her and Veronica, he doesn’t know what to do; Veronica also keeps trying to hook him up. Kathryn tells him not to listen, and Derek tells her about the accident.

At the hospital, the doctor tells Melissa all the tests look good. He asks when she last had a checkup, but she doesn’t know. He thinks they should make sure the baby is okay, but she says she’s fine and doesn’t want any tests; she doesn’t give a damn about the baby. She wants to know where that bitch is, and is disappointed to find out Veronica is going to recover. The doctor seems kind of shocked at the way she’s talking, but geez, you’d think he’d be just a little more concerned.

Bartender Rocky asks if Candace wants another drink, and she says she does. He asks if she’s had a hard day, and she tells him to pour the damn drink, so I guess that’s an affirmative. He tells her careful. He heard people talking, and there’s a guy who looks like vice. She asks about new girl, checking out a young woman at one of the tables. Rocky says she’s doing well, and Candace asks if he got his cut, telling him you always pay the house. He asks when that started, and she says now; she’ll talk to her.

A dude comes up to Candace, introducing himself as Leonardo. She says he’s vice; she can smell them. He asks if she’s a working girl, and she says she’s a college student. He asks why whores come to nice places, and not keep in their lane. She says she’s studying law, and if he doesn’t stop bothering her, he’ll be fired, and to get away with his cheap-ass aftershave. He moves on to new girl. Candace tells Rocky that he’d better warn her, but on second thought, don’t. See how it plays out.

Melissa goes to Veronica’s hospital room. She sits on the bed, and tells Veronica she looks bad. We should all look this bad. She looks maybe a little bit tired. Veronica says Melissa tried to kill her, and Melissa says she tried to kill the both of them. Veronica says she’s crazy as hell, and Melissa says, that makes two of us. Veronica says she’s not taking care of Melissa’s mother anymore; she’ll be starving and hungry. Melissa doesn’t give a damn. She says Veronica doesn’t get it. She’s a crazy-ass girl who’s out of control; she has a rebel streak a mile long. Her dad died, and she didn’t get to say goodbye, and it’s now Veronica’s problem. Veronica says people die, and it’s a good thing Melissa is having her grandchild. It’s the only thing keeping Veronica off her ass. She asks why Melissa is there. Melissa says she needs money, and starts digging in Veronica’s purse. Veronica asks if she’s lost her mind, and Melissa asks if she just figured it out. She calls Veronica a bitch, and screams as she leaves the room. That was interesting, and I wonder if the director (does Tyler Perry direct these too?) just let her have at it.

Veronica calls the courthouse, and leaves a message for one of the judges. She says her daughter-in-law is unstable. She needs to have her committed, at least until the baby is born. After she’s finished, she says the dumb bitch doesn’t even know when she’s being set up.

In his office, George talks to Sarah. He says they have Jennifer’s body with the note pointing to the Cryers; their son Wyatt says they did it; and Jeffrey is going down for Quincy’s murder after Veronica gave him up. He states the obvious, saying it’s one messed up family. He still wants more information; enough for an indictment. Veronica is such a snake, he wants to make sure all the T’s are crossed, and the case is solid, so she can’t wiggle out. Sarah wonders what more he could want, but he says they’re dealing with the Cryers, the Harringtons, and lost money. He needs some DNA. Presenting a dysfunctional family at each other’s throats won’t work; he needs something solid. Sarah says they’re working on it.

Out in the hallway, Oscar comes up to Sarah, and hands her a phone, saying it’s for her. It’s Jim, but she pretends not to know who he is. He says he needs her at a hotel room at lunchtime. She tells him it’s not possible, but he says, sure it is. He thinks she’d better get her ass there, and hangs up. Oscar asks if the call was unpleasant. As he walks away, he says if he was her, he’d be there.

There’s a knock at Candace’s door. It’s Benny and Hanna, but she doesn’t want to see them. She doesn’t want to hear anything Hanna has to say. Hanna asks, not even from her own baby? and gives her the letter. Candace reads it, and Hanna says the baby knew this needed to be fixed. Candace says there’s nothing to fix; she let them kill her son. Hanna says, no, she didn’t. Candace says she doesn’t have time for this; she’s busy turning tricks. Hanna asks what it’s going to take, and Candace says, her dying. Hanna says the Bible says we should forgive, and Candace calls her the perfect saint. Hanna tells Candace that she never said that, but she’s wondering where all this anger came from; she doesn’t understand. Hanna says she’s sorry. She’s prayed, stopped praying, and doesn’t know what else to do. Candace doesn’t care. Benny says he’s not doing this anymore. He tells Candace that their mom has a nice house with plenty of room. Candace tells Hanna not to worry about her stepping into the house Hanna’s “massa” got her. Hanna hoped the letter would shake up something, but guesses there’s nothing. Candace wonders how the bullets missed Hanna. Hanna begged her for Quincy, and he would have been safe in foster care; he’d be alive. She says it’s just as much Benny’s fault, and to get out. Benny says War wasn’t after him. Hanna says that Candace has to make it the way she wants it, and to let it go; she’s hurting. Candace says Hanna knows nothing about her and to get out. There’s a knock at the door, and the truck driver (or not) comes in. He thinks he has the wrong room, and Candace says they need to go.

Hanna says Candace has to let truck driver dude go. He’s her father.

Next time, Kathryn continues to play matchmaker, Justin attacks Wyatt, and Hanna tells Candace she was an unwanted baby.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

LVP arrives at Vanderpump Dogs. She meets Peanut who came from a hoarder. She’s incredibly tiny, and I want her. They also have her sister. LVP thinks having the puppies come in feeds her addiction. She says Ken is going to want this one. He’s very attached to Giggy, and wants him cloned. It costs fifty grand, and LVP isn’t too sure. She thinks of what the money could do for the rescue. In her interview, she says he’s never talked about cloning her. They discuss the lawsuit. They were going to merge with another rescue center, and Ken thought they should withdraw. He had given them $40K, and now the woman is suing, saying Ken reneged on the partnership. Ohh, Peanut is sleeping half inside Ken’s shirt. LVP thinks Ken needs to be more stringent and careful.

Teddi visits her esthetician, Josh. She’s not into shopping, but likes a facial. She’s a fan of Botox, but has steered clear of fillers until now. She tells Josh about the Vegas trip, and thinks bringing Josh over is an appropriate thank you gift. She says they don’t have a lot in common, but they’re all concerned with their appearance.

Kyle is hands-on with American Woman, and we see clips of her involvement with the show. She says they film in the same lot that she and Kim grew up on. Kyle gets choked up watching an episode. She says as a child, her mom hid her vulnerability, but she can see it with an adult perspective now. She feels her sisters don’t understand the project, because it’s “inspired by” not “based on” their life. If she wanted something new as a kid, her mother would tell her to get a job and work for it. That’s how my father was. True story. The summer before my senior year of high school, my boyfriend was in NYC attending summer acting school. I wanted to visit, and my father was like, no way. I argued that I couldn’t do anything there that I couldn’t have done already where I was, since I was home alone while my dad was at work. He saw the logic in this, but told me although he’d pay for the plane ticket, I had to pay for the rest. That was fair.

Dorit asks Erika to come along to shop for PK’s birthday gift. Erika is glad they’ve put their differences behind them. The shopping trip is a chance to communicate without outside influences. They discuss men acting like infants when they get hurt. The rich – they’re just like us! Dorit goes to a Pagani dealership, but neither one of them know anything about these cars. The dealer tells her there are only thirty of them and the car is three million. Erika says Mr. Gerardi would have a problem with that. They take it for a test drive with Erika driving. She thinks it’s like driving a spaceship. It blows away her Lamborghini, and she’s like Little Sisters of the Poor in comparison. Dorit says if she buys this, PK won’t be thinking about the car, but taking her to an insane asylum for spending so much.

LisaR puts heavy cream in Harry’s tea, and it curdles. Harry says there’s a reason he does the cooking. He’s doing three different projects. LisaR gives Harry credit for turning down roles when the kids were small, so he could be there with them. Harry thinks Delilah going to NYC before she has things lined up, gives her too much leeway, so he doesn’t want her going before classes start at NYU. LisaR thinks the kids have to learn the hard way, and that sometimes you have to get your heart broken. Harry says his mind goes to scary things, but LisaR says she has a bubble of white light around them. He says he feels so much better now, and asks if creeps bounce off the bubbles. He wonders if maybe they could sell them.

Little dogs! Peanut! I want her! Kyle brings Portia and her friend, Elle, to Vanderpump Dogs, along with one of her dogs, Storm. One of the groomers has called in sick, so LVP pretends she forgot to tell Kyle. In her interview, LVP says she just likes to mess with Kyle, and they’re going to groom the dog themselves. Storm is not liking the bath one bit, and I can identify with this, since my Juliet screams like a banshee. It takes both of them to lift him onto the grooming table for drying, and LVP attacks Kyle with the hair dryer. Afterward, Kyle tells LVP that she got Storm from the rescue they were almost involved with. She says something like that is bound to happen when you own multiple businesses. LVP says it takes its toll, but she wonders how Ken is doing. She says it’s out for public consumption. She wonders why Teddi is so upset with Dorit, and we flash back to Lategate. Kyle says it was an argument over time that became something else, and does a wonderful impression of Dorit.

Teddi calls Dorit, and asks her to come early, before everyone else, so they can chat. In her interview, Dorit acts like an idiot about having to come a whole fifteen minutes earlier.

Teddi and her party planner, Jaime, grew up riding horses together. Teddi isn’t big on entertaining, but gets OCD when she has an event. Dorit manages to get there early. She says bright and early, but it’s just after four pm. They both get a drink. Dorit wonders why she got her rosé in a champagne glass. She tells Teddi that she’s not letting anyone touch her face. In her interview, Teddi says she was good with that ahead of time, and even mentioned it on the invite. She tells Dorit she didn’t really care that she was so late, and they immediately disagree on the time they were supposed to meet. Teddi tells Dorit that she’s never wrong about time; she’s an accountability coach. Dorit asks if she really thinks she would lie, but Teddi doesn’t know. She’s defending herself for something she didn’t do wrong, and talking about it to someone who isn’t involved. Dorit wonders how she got to be the villain. Teddi says it was obviously a miscommunication, and Dorit thinks she’s overreacting. Teddi says Dorit put her in the position of having a conversation with another woman about her. Dorit asks why Teddi didn’t talk to her, and if she’s talked to the others. Teddi says she did, and Dorit wonders what she did wrong. Teddi says she also hurt another girl’s feelings, and brings up Camille. Teddi realizes she’s not getting anywhere, and says, fine, let it go. Dorit says she’s changing her glass. I think the problem with Dorit is that she’s just plain rude.

LisaR says she’s always up for a spa day, and she needs a fluff and puff. Dorit brings up the glass again. LisaR understands the glass differences, but doesn’t give a sh*t about them. Dorit tells them she’s planning a 50th birthday surprise party for PK, and she’s thinking old school, Frank Sinatra. PK has never had anyone plan a party for him. She has family and friends flying in. His family lives in London, and she feels like there couldn’t be anything better. It’s also black tie. Teddi doesn’t focus on aesthetics, and is uncomfortable about being out of her element. LVP joins them.

LVP says she heard about LisaR mentioning her husband. LisaR says she read about it, and wondered how they were doing. LisaR insists it was nothing malicious, although it didn’t seem that way to me. In her interview, LisaR says it’s all over TMZ, so you’d better believe she’s talking about it. Not malicious? She’s so full of it.

Kyle and Erika round out the group. Erika tells us that Tom has never been at home this much during the entire time they’ve been together. She needed an escape. Dorit pounces on Kyle about the time thing, and it’s like she’s watching a ping-pong match between Dorit and Teddi.

Camille arrives. Dorit says this is the most childish conversation ever, and Teddi says drop it, and gets on the table for a procedure. In her interview, she says her glam circle is more like a circle of death. Dorit tells LVP that Teddi claims Camille was offended by what she’d said. Erika says she left the house to get some peace, but instead of a glam circle, she entered a hen circle. Everyone gets various treatments done. In her interview, LVP says if poking fun at LisaR were a sport, she’d get a gold medal. There’s also a station with flowers and terrariums and crystals. I don’t know what that’s about, but it looks really cool. I love terrariums.

Dorit thinks it’s funny to bug Camille during her treatment. Camille tells her that the c-word is harsh, because she’s too stupid to know this. Camille also wasn’t happy with her strap-on comments.  Dorit says it came out of nowhere, and if her actions caused Camille hurt, she apologizes. In her interview, Camille is sure she’s sincere, but it would take a lot to trust her. They hug, and say they’ll do lunch.

Next time, LVP discusses Teddi with Dorit, PK’s party happens along with Boy George, and Dorit calls Teddi a psycho.

🍁 Since there was a block of time between shows, I saw Stripped. It was day six, so I figured they’d at least be somewhat clothed, and I wouldn’t have to see what I didn’t want to, even if it was blurred. I thought it was a rip-off. From what I understood, the participants started off with nothing, and each day they were allowed to reclaim one item, be it a fork or pants. The two guys I saw were totally dressed, including one wearing a baseball cap, and they kept going out to dinner with friends who paid for everything. There was an interesting moment at the end where they grilled some food, and used palm fronds as plates, along with twig utensils, but on the whole, this show was nothing like I thought. And I call cheating.

💃 I’ve also kind of been watching I Am Jazz, but I feel the same way I do about Sister Wives. I like the people a lot, and there’s the dynamic of living outside the norm, but it’s just day to day stuff. My neighbors are probably more interesting. Well, maybe not my neighbors, but somebody’s.

😵 I re-watched Vanderpump Rules. Jax’s face at the end, when he sees Brittany’s mother has come to visit, is worth the whole hour.

PaganiCar

A Pagani Car

January 17, 2018 – All About Ava, the NJ Reunion Begins, Larry Has a Bad Day & Some Tabatha

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Ava looks at herself in the mirror and thinks about Carly insulting her. Julian stops by to wish her luck. She says she’ll take it. She’s out of options if the treatment doesn’t work. Julian says she’s still a knockout, and asks if it’s worth it. She says she’s been through hell, and it clarified things. He says he’s blamed a lot of people for his bad deeds, and the only way he found true peace was to take responsibility for his own actions. Maybe she should try it. She tells him that she has to make a stop before going to GH – she has some unfinished business.

Ava thanks Sonny for seeing her. She’s having a medical procedure, and you never know. She wants to see her daughter. He says Avery is with her mother, and Ava says Carly isn’t her mother. Sonny says Carly does what she doesn’t. Ava says that’s only because he won’t let her, but he says Kiki practically raised herself. Carly comes in with Avery, but Sonny directs them to the kitchen. He says his son is dead because of Ava. She tells him he has no right to punish her for what Olivia-J did. He says if he’d killed her after she murdered Connie, his son would still be alive. Carly comes back in, and Ava says they can’t keep her away forever, but Carly tells her when Avery finds out what she did, she won’t want anything to do with her. Ava says their house was built with blood money, and promises Avery will know her.

At the hospital, Kiki tells Griff that she tried to get some sleep, but had to be there for her mom. She’s concerned that Ava thinks it’s going to fix more than her face, but thanks Griff for pulling her back from the brink. They hug, and Ava walks in. Kiki tells her there’s still time to back out. She’s going through with the surgery and whatever the outcome is, she’ll accept it.

Ava lies on the table. The surgeon asks if she’s ready. He says when she wakes up she’ll be a new woman. He puts the mask on her, and tells her to count backward from ten.

Ava opens her eyes to Griff and Kiki. Kiki says it was successful. Ava wants to see, but she’s still woozy. She hears Griff say, here’s some lithium for the pain, but what he really said was ibuprofen. He says the bandages have to stay on overnight. He thinks she’ll be happy with the result, and says he can take her home when she’s ready. She’s ready now and asks if Kiki wants to come but she thinks they need alone time.

Time moves fast in Port Charles. The next morning, Ava looks at herself in the mirror. Griff asks if she’s ready. She wonders if it was for nothing, and doesn’t know if she can do this. He says they’ll do it together, and kisses her. He helps her remove the bandages and asks what she thinks. I think she looks pretty much the same minus that small blemish almost where you couldn’t see it. She says it worked, and Griff asks how she wants to celebrate the first day of the rest of her life.

At the MetroCourt of course. Sonny and Carly are also dining there. Ava says it’s been months since she was shamed away from the restaurant, and she’s done hiding. He tells her to get the drinks, and he’ll grab a table. She crosses paths with Laura, who says her face seems to have miraculously recovered. She hopes Ava’s appearance was worth selling her soul. Ava sees a woman go past, and follows her to the ladies’ room. Wow. The stalls are huge. There’s no one else there, and she wonders where the woman went. Carly comes in, and asks how dare she show her face there? Ava asks if she’s going to congratulate her on her recovery, but Carly says her son will never recover. Ava says she’s not going to continue to hide because Sonny can’t let it go. Carly says she’s not going to rest until the world sees Ava for the ugly soul she is. She leaves, and Ava gets a text from “Unknown,” saying they know who she is.

At Kelly’s, Ava complains about the portrait Franco painted. There are too many shadows, and she wants it to be about emerging from the darkness. The woman from the MetroCourt comes in, and picks up a to-go order. Ava follows her out, but she disappears again. Ava literally runs into Nina, and asks where the woman went. She keeps seeing her and getting texts. She asks if they’re from Nina, and asks why she’s sending them. Nina has no idea what Ava is talking about. Ava says sorry she doesn’t have a baby for Nina to snatch form her womb. Nina says she had a psychotic break, but she’s moved on, and doesn’t even think about Ava anymore.

Back home, Ava says someone is messing with her, but who? There’s a knock at the door. She opens it without looking through the peephole, which makes no sense whatsoever. It’s Morgan. He says he needs help. Is this whole thing a dream? Is Bobby in the shower? I’m guessing it is a dream, since the episode is focusing on one person, and every once in a while, the close-ups are a little odd.

Ava says this isn’t real; he’s dead. He says it’s real and it’s him. She takes him to the couch, and tends to a wound on his forehead. He tells her that he has a prosthetic hand to replace the one he lost in the explosion. She asks where he’s been, but he doesn’t know. He remembers taking a car, and got out to talk to Jason. Next thing he knew, fire was everywhere. He woke up in the hospital. His hand was gone, but he was alive. Ava says that means she didn’t lose him. She loves him so much. She says his injuries are new, and Morgan tells her that he couldn’t stay at the hospital. Someone is trying to kill him. He thought maybe it was the doctors, so he came there. Ava says the person who planted the bomb is in prison, and the doctors were trying to help him. They wouldn’t have known his diagnosis, and he needs his medication. He says he was a prisoner, and wonders if he’s making it up. She says sometimes it’s difficult to think clearly without his meds. He says he can’t trust himself. He was spiraling out of control before the explosion. She says it doesn’t matter. He’s alive, and they need to tell everyone. He says he screwed up. He tells her it wasn’t an accident, and someone is trying to kill him. He asks to stay there, and she says of course.

Ava wakes up, and sees Morgan on the couch sleeping. She says he’s really there. Kiki knocks on the door. She asks if Ava slept in her clothes, and Ava asks what she’s doing there. Kiki asks if everything is okay. Ava says she’s working hard on the show, and will see her later. When she’s gone, Morgan comes out, and Ava asks why he was hiding. He doesn’t know what he’d say to Kiki, and asks if she’s still with Dillon. Ava says he really loves Kiki, and he says with all his heart. Ava gets a series of texts from Unknown, saying they’re coming. They know who she is, and what she did. She tells Morgan she’s been getting weird texts. He needs to tell the family he’s alive. He asks what if they’re not at the house? She tells him not to worry. She knows how to tell everyone he’s back.

She brings Morgan to the gallery. She says half the town will be there tonight. Franco drops by. Ava stashes Morgan in the back, and Franco gives her the final portrait. She thanks him, and hustles him out. Morgan asks what’s going on? She wants to show everyone he’s alive, and that she’s changed. People will stop blaming her for what happened. She says he’ll hear things about her, but if he ever loved her at all, trust her.

Ava visits Carly. She says she has something important to tell her and Sonny. They need to show up at the gallery tonight; it will change everything. She tells Carly that she helped Jason escape. She’s done terrible things, but she’s becoming a different person. She needs them to be there tonight, and she’ll show them.

At the gallery, Scotty congratulates Ava, and makes a toast to her being back where she belongs. She sees the mystery woman serving drinks. She asks if Griff knows her, but there’s no one there. She tells him that she must be tired. Griff feels like she’s keeping him at arm’s length. She asks him to trust her and says everything will make sense soon.

Carly and Sonny come in. Sonny says it better be good, and Ava tells him to trust her. He says that will never happen after what she did to Morgan. She says Morgan is alive, and she can prove it. She calls to Morgan, and tells him to show them he’s all right. She insists he’s there. A woman comes out in a bloody dress and says, Hello, Ava. It’s Connie Falconari.

Ava doesn’t understand. She says Morgan was here, and Connie is dead. Connie says Ava would know. Ava shot her in cold blood, left her there to die on a cold floor, and she bled out slowly and painfully. Ava says Morgan was here, and Connie can’t be here. Connie says she dreamed him up to absolve herself, but she can’t. Just like Ava can’t absolve herself of killing her. Ava says she was protecting Julian, and Connie asks if that’s true, or was it because she told the world Kiki wasn’t a Quartermaine? She ruined Ava’s plans, so Ava murdered her. Ava refuses to be judged for the rest of her life. She says Julian abused his wife; Nina stole her baby daughter; and Valentin killed Nikolas right in front of her. She tells Sonny that bodies lie in his wake for the sake of his business. What makes him better than her? He says he knows who he is. He’s made bad choices, but she lied to everyone about what she is and what she’s done, and the worst part is she lied to herself. Connie says her lies are over. It’s time to face the truth.

Ava is alone with a light shining on her. Nina says Ava stole her husband. Laura says she betrayed Nikolas and Spencer by refusing to tell the truth. Connie says Ava shot her in cold blood, without conscience or remorse. Griff is there, and Ava says to tell them she’s changed; not just her face. Tell them there’s good in her. He says he thought there was, but after seeing this, maybe some souls can’t be saved. She asks if Kiki knows better. She’s Kiki’s mama, and loves her. Kiki says she’s jealous, and switched Morgan’s pills because she wanted him for herself. Ava yells, stop it!

She opens her eyes to see the mystery woman, who asks if she’s been getting the messages. She’s the one texting. Ava doesn’t understand; she doesn’t know her at all. The woman asks if she doesn’t recognize her own daughter. It’s Avery. Ava comes closer. She says it is her. How could she not see it? She hugs Avery, and says she loves her. She doesn’t understand how Avery is all grown up, and asks if she’s dead. Avery says no, but Morgan is, because of her. She took away the medicine he needed to be sane, and he died. She lies to everyone, but most of all to herself. Ava says that Avery’s father hates her, and kept her away. Avery says he was protecting her. Ava says Carly is wrong. Her soul isn’t ugly; she’s been cleansed by fire. Her new face will show everyone what Griff sees. Avery says Griff sees what he wants to see, to justify leaving the priesthood. Ava refuses to be defined by her past, and is going to move forward, like nothing ever happened. Avery says Ava claims to be terrified that Avery will never know her, but she thinks Ava is scared that she’ll see her for what she is. Franco’s portrait appears, with Ava’s face covered in scars, and suddenly, Ava’s face looks like it did right after the accident. Avery says, time to wake up. Griff tells Ava, welcome back.

At the apartment, Ava looks at herself. Griff thought she’d be thrilled. She says she is. She says he doesn’t judge by her past; he sees the real her. She tells him that she had a dream when she was under, and he says a lot of patients dream crazy things when they are. He wonders what it was about, but she says it’s not important. The only thing that matters is she’s been given a new lease on life, and she doesn’t want to waste it. She knows where he’s taking her.

Back to the MetroCourt. Carly sees them come in, and is like, no way. Sonny says he’ll handle it. He tells Ava that she’s not welcome there, and that she can eat somewhere else. She tells him that she chooses to eat there. They both have to live their lives, for better or worse. She goes to the bar, and the bartender puts a martini in front of her. She asks how they knew. It’s grown Avery, who says she knows who Ava is.

Tomorrow, Molly says she can take care of herself, Laura says all Jim cares about is the almighty dollar, and Alexis tells Ned she can’t support his campaign or platform.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey – The Reunion, Part One

Jewel tones is the wardrobe theme. No pigtails for Margaret tonight though. Teresa wants to make out with Andy, who says he’s a great kisser. I sometimes think he’s a closet heterosexual.

We flash back to the ladies’ business ventures. The restaurant, envy, Margaret’s shoe line. Melissa says she didn’t want Joe #2 taking on another job, but when he talks about the family, she gets soft. Melissa says nothing will ever come between her and Teresa again, and everyone agrees they’re solid this time. Andy asks Margaret about how Melissa is running the boutique, and Margaret says she’s on point. We also find out Margaret sometimes wears pigtail extensions. Andy points out that Betsey Johnson tweeted while watching the show, that she still rocks pigtails at 75, and I almost pass out that she’s that old. She’s one of my favorite designers. Siggy pisses me off early on, rolling her eyes and making faces when Margaret talks about hearing from Betsey personally. Excuse me for missing it, but what is wrong with her talking about this? Andy brought it up and um… this is a reality show where people’s real lives are watched and discussed.

Margaret is up, and we go down Memory Lane with clips of her life from this season. Andy asks if the kids have reached out. She says they watch the show, but no. She says she’d be there at the drop of a hat and would take crumbs. Andy brings up that there are three husbands named Joe who are also contractors. A viewer asks if Margaret sees that she should have kept quiet. Margaret thinks she can be offensive, but it’s her humor. She says she apologized to Siggy a million times, and the only thing Siggy said truthfully was that she wanted to destroy Margaret. Siggy says she’s an Israeli, and Margaret tells her to bring it on. Dolores says this isn’t going to go well. Not unless everyone suddenly decides to act their age. And by everyone, I mean Siggy. I’ve decided she’s the most annoyingly stupid woman on earth. Or at least on Bravo, and that’s saying a lot.

We see clips of everyone’s kids, so I take a nap. Then there’s some who-ha talk. Melissa’s phone rings. It’s Ramona Singer (!). Andy answers, and tells her they’re in the middle of the effing reunion. She says goodbye, and Andy tells Melissa to put it on airplane mode. A question is asked about discipline of Teresa’s girls. She says they’ve lost a lot, and nobody is walking in her shoes. Preach it! Andy outs Teresa about banning Melissa from visiting her in prison. She says she wanted to deal with the friendship when she got back. We see clips of how the family was affected when Teresa lost her mother. Andy says seeing her dad crying struck his heart. Mine too. Teresa says he goes to the cemetery every day. Andy wonders if she’s still going to blame Joe #1 for the year she lost when he gets back. She says he has a lot of making up to do, and it was therapeutic for her to get it out in her book. Andy asks if the others would stick around, should their husbands “go away.” Melissa says she’d give Joe #2 more hell. Teresa says there wasn’t a time she seriously thought of leaving. Andy asks if Joe #1 seems different, and she says he watches the show, and realizes he’s an a-hole. Andy brings up the possibility of him getting deported. Teresa says whatever God’s plan is, is what’s going to happen, and she’ll embrace it as best she can.

Ugh! Next is Siggy and Margaret. It started with the memorial thing, and how she and Dolores felt left out. Siggy says she brought Margaret in; where’s the respect? Siggy comes off looking like an airhead Mafia wife from a comedy starring Joe Pesci. Margaret’s best line: It’s draining; you’re fifty. Andy brings up Siggy selling the Soggy T-shirts, and she says she likes to take a negative and turn it into a positive. Teresa thinks both Siggy and Margaret went below the belt. Siggy claims she never starts it. Maybe not, but she’ll sure keep it going. Margaret says she didn’t realize they weren’t coming to the memorial, and it turned into a debacle like she had a nefarious plan to leave them out. Siggy thinks when she ordered the flowers, she should have called. A viewer says Siggy and Dolores are about as mean girls as you can get, but Siggy insists it’s just fighting back. Margaret says she can dish it and take it, but she did apologize. Siggy is on a roll, and won’t shut up, even though Margaret is trying to answer her questions. Margaret thinks Siggy blaming her behavior on menopause and having a hysterectomy is victimizing women. She says Siggy is abrasive on social media. Apparently, Siggy wanted to report Margaret to PETA, because she has a taxidermized bear in her foyer. Margaret points out that veal is a baby cow who is force fed. Siggy says if Margaret makes fun of her foyer, she’s going to do the same. Margaret says Siggy always takes things to the next level. This is unbelievably stupid.

Andy tells us because of unlikely friendship, Danielle came back to the Garden State. Danielle comes out, and even Dolores thinks she looks amazing. She does. Andy says this season must have been different for her, as compared to season two. He says he never thought they’d go from flipping tables to having each other’s back. We flash back to moments of their friendship, starting with the table and ending with Teresa’s apology to Danielle’s daughters. Andy reminds them about Teresa pushing him during the last reunion Danielle attended. Melissa takes accountability for stirring the pot, saying she genuinely liked Danielle when no one else did. She never saw anything that Danielle did wrong. Teresa says there was never any real ill intent. Danielle talks about her children having been affected by the things Teresa said, and at one point, they moved because of it. We find out Danielle had sex in the bathroom at the Gorgas restaurant, but she says she got permission. Alrighty then. Siggy says it was inappropriate and disgusting. Dolores says Teresa is a big girl, and if she wants a friendship with Danielle, it’s up to her, but if that changes, she promises not to hold it over Teresa’s head that she warned her. Yeah, right. She and Siggy are like, fourteen mentally, at most.

Here comes Cakegate. Andy says it led to tears, a never-ending feud, and a memorable therapy session. We see clips of the cake fight, and Siggy’s subsequent embarrassment of Melissa at her purse party. Siggy is insane. Siggy says a lot of thought, time, and effort went into the cake. Melissa says she understood why Siggy was upset. Melissa had no idea the cake was going to end up on her face, but when it did, she had fun with it. Teresa says she was upset that the bottom was plastic. Melissa says the name-calling was upsetting. Siggy acts like she had too much to drink, and doesn’t remember, and says she owns it. Margaret says that doesn’t make it right. Siggy says they hold her to a higher ground, but I think she means standard, and says it must be the kosher thing. What? A viewer asks about her calling out Melissa, and Siggy makes it sound like we missed something, didn’t see both sides, and she was just being funny. Melissa says Siggy tried to shame her, and she was embarrassed. Siggy says she was just trying to make a point and wanted her feelings acknowledged. Margaret says if someone did that to her, she’d be all sensitive about it. Siggy thinks Melissa should have had her back more. Melissa says it was a different Siggy than last year. Siggy apologizes if Melissa was embarrassed. Margaret points out the if – something I hate too – and Siggy says Margaret inserts herself where she doesn’t belong. Siggy says they shouldn’t overanalyze it, but Andy says it’s a reunion; they overanalyze everything.

Teresa says Melissa handled it well, and doesn’t think she would have. Melissa says she doesn’t like to be talked down to, and doesn’t think she deserved it. They talk about Siggy saying her IQ is 167. Siggy says she just made the number up, and Margaret says like she made up her career with no degree. Ouch! Siggy says she tried her hardest to bring friendships together, but she’s accepted it, and moved on. Andy asks Melissa if she understands why Dolores and Siggy insist on staying friends with Kim D. Melissa is baffled, saying Kim D tries to ruin businesses and families, and it’s not like they’re related to her. Dolores says if it hadn’t been a fundraiser, she wouldn’t have done it. Siggy says she knew Kim D five years before Melissa, and Melissa says, who cares? Margaret tells them that Kim D hurts the entire family, and it’s complicit to associate with her and defend her.

Andy says, guess what? She’s here! Teresa goes, blech, and the witch comes out. Teresa says she thought it was Real Housewives of New Jersey, not Tales from the Crypt. Kim D is like, ha-ha-ha, so funny. Teresa says if Kim D takes jabs at her family, Teresa will take jabs at her. Kim D says if Teresa messes with her, she’ll go back to jail – clink-clink! Teresa gets up.

Next time, Dolores and Danielle go at it, Kim D accuses Teresa of stealing, Siggy screams at Margaret, Teresa says Kim D is a madam (or magnum, as she puts it), and Danielle walks out. Now that Teresa has brought it up, Kim D does look like an old, washed-up madam. Like Sylvia Miles in that horror movie about the carnival. Oddly enough, she’s dressed like a nun next to the others.

If Loving You is Wrong

Eddie is shooting like a wild man, and Lushion punches him out. He asks if Eddie is crazy, and Eddie says Lushion knows he is. Larry says he’s a wild one, and he loves it. Eddie says he’s going to kill them, and Larry says he’s taking notes. Eddie tells them they have no idea what they’ve started. Larry says he’s going to break Eddie like a stallion, and that Eddie is really only a Shetland pony. Eddie says Larry is going to be in a box by the end of the week. He leaves, and Natalie asks what happened. Lushion tells her not to ask.

Stephen arrives on his motorcycle, and asks Lushion if everything is all right. Lushion says everything is under control, and thanks for showing up an hour late. Stephen tells Esperanza he’s not there because of Travis. He asks if she saw Eddie in his new get-up. She has a picture, and he wants to see it. She shows him her phone. He asks if Eddie is into this kind of stuff, but she says if he is, she never knew. He says it’s all over the station, and she says he’s going to have a rough day tomorrow. Stephen asks if he can meet Esperanza at her place, but she tells him to go home. He begs, and she tells him to stop. He says if he sees the porch lights on, he’ll come by. She says they’re always on, and it’s not the old West. She gets in her car, and calls him. She tells him not to flirt in front of the others again. She doesn’t want them in her business. He says, so now they have business? She says no, but her porch light will be on.

Ian tells Lushion Kelly isn’t good. He says representing her is a conflict, and Lushion has to find her a new lawyer. He can recommend someone, but it’s competition, and he has to run it by Larry. Lushion asks if Larry is into the S&M thing. Ian says he’s heard some things, but tries to stay away from that. He’s heard Larry and his wife throw wild parties though. Lushion says Larry had a run-in with a bad officer. Ian asks what he did. Lushion says he had him in a crazy position, and Eddie isn’t going to let it go. Ian says Larry is formidable and ruthless. That’s why he doesn’t know if he can do anything for Kelly.

Natalie says she’ll make something to help Kelly sleep. Kelly thanks her for everything. She doesn’t know if she’ll get through this, but Natalie says she will. She thanks Lushion, and he tells her to get some rest.

Stephen knocks on Esperanza’s door. She tells him to come in. She lounges provocatively in a lingerie ensemble. She asks if this is what he wants, and he says, yes ma’am. He says she knows he likes her. All the coffee he brings her at the station, and the flirting. He tells her he’s being respectful because of her, not Eddie. She says Eddie has run off every boyfriend she’s tried having. He asks if he’s her boyfriend, but she tells him she didn’t say that. They’re just two people who clicked. She loved that he didn’t run away, and he asks if that turned her on. She says he turns her on, and tells him to take his clothes off. She’s going to sleep with him when she wants to, see him when she wants to, and when she says it’s over, it’s over. He says he’ll take whatever she wants to give. She tells him to get on his knees.

Alex asks why Brad didn’t wake her up, but he says there was no need to. She wonders if he didn’t want to talk to her, and he says it’s nothing like that. She asks for a hug and kiss. He barely hugs and kisses her, and she thinks it felt forced. He asks what she wants. She says she didn’t go over there, and would like him to believe her. He says, okay. He tells her he’s going to wait outside for Marcie to bring the car back. He tells her he’s trying to get past it, but it’s not easy.

Esperanza says it’s time for Stephen to go. She tells him not to look at her strangely at work, and he feigns ignorance. He asks if she thinks she’s that good, and she says she knows. She says he’s okay; she’s had better. He doesn’t believe her, and says she smiles when she’s lying. He has a trained eye. She tells him not to leave his socks or little Stephen trinkets behind. She tries to keep her daughter out of the madness, but it’s getting harder. She tells him her daughter comes first, and she’s coming back today. She says when you deal with a sociopath like Eddie, you understand the need to be in control. He tells her to let him know when they can meet again. She tells him not to even acknowledge her at work today. He leaves, and she smiles as she makes the bed.

Ian calls Marcie. He says if everything goes well, he’d like to close this week. She says she’ll call the inspector. She asks what he knows about Larry. She asked him to rep her in the divorce, but she was at the house when the shooting happened, and he was there. He was drunk and strange. Ian says he’s an incredible attorney, but he can be out there. Marcie wonders if he’d break privilege. She told him something she hasn’t told Randal. Ian thinks she should talk to Larry about it.

Marcie calls Larry. Larry is sleeping, and Randal picks up. She idiotically starts the conversation with, I know you didn’t tell Randal I’m pregnant. Randal says, so you are, and she asks what he’s doing with Larry’s phone. He asks what she’s doing pregnant? She hangs up, and he calls back. He asks if she’s having the bastard’s baby, and she says she is. He asks if she’s taking it that far, and she asks if it upsets him. He hopes she has it, and she asks if he’s threatening her. He says she hasn’t been able to carry one before. She calls him a sick bleeped-out-word, and hangs up. She’s like, great.

Randal dumps a bucket of water on Larry, who jumps up like a cartoon character. Randal says, so she is pregnant; she just told him. He tells Larry to get out of his house. In the car, Larry calls Marcie. She’s like, wth? and asks if Larry told him. Larry says he was talking about Alex. She asks what kind of sick friends they are, and he says he’s sorry. She says he’s also fired. Bad day for Larry.

Randal sees Brad on the porch. He says Brad did it. Brad says what? and Randal says Marcie is pregnant with his baby. Brad says she is, and Randal says, good. Brad asks if Marcie told him, and Randal says don’t worry about it. Brad asks if it was Alex, and Randal says, it was. He asks when, and Randal says last night. Brad asks what time, but he doesn’t know. He claims she wants him back. Brad says he’s lying. Randal tells him to ask her, but Brad isn’t giving him the satisfaction. He says as a man, he’s telling Brad the truth. Brad says to get off his property. Randal says he’s on the sidewalk. He has a really funny look on his face, like he’s bummed. Brad says he’s tired of Randal. If he thinks the ladder was something, wait until what’s next. Brad says Marcie is coming to pick him up, and accuses Randal of putting sugar in her gas tank, calling him immature. He asks if it doesn’t get old, and Randal says he’s not done with this. He goes back home.

Lushion comes home and asks Natalie what time she went to bed. She says around four, but Kelly’s been up all night. He says that’s not good; she has to give her statement to the police today. She asks if anybody talked to Justice. Lushion says he doesn’t know if anything happened. Natalie wonders if Kelly can get off. He says if Ian was handling it, she would, but he has a conflict. His partner represents Travis and his church. He tells Natalie that Kelly has no money, and they’ll have to figure it out.

Kelly is sitting on the couch, and tells Lushion it’s a beautiful day; almost like nothing happened. She asks how Travis is, but they haven’t heard anything. He tells her he’ll call, but they have to go to the station. Natalie comes out and asks how she is, but Kelly doesn’t know. Natalie tells her it will be okay. Kelly starts to cry. Lushion insists that they have to go. Kelly says she hasn’t heard from Ian, and Lushion says they’ll call on the way.

Larry has a headache, and rightly so. Ian asks what he did last night, but he says Ian doesn’t want to know. Ian says they have a problem. Larry says shoot, but Ian says wrong word. Travis was shot last night. His parents want a press conference at noon. He asks if Larry realizes he’s not nineteen. Larry asks who shot him, and Ian says his ex-girlfriend. He was representing her before this, and they found strange evidence he was stalking her. Larry says it was the other way around, but Ian says Travis drove by her house 46 times in one day, and it gets worse. He hacked into her accounts, pretended to be her husband, and misrepresented her on several loans. He’s worse than his brother. Larry asks if the DA has it, and Ian says, not yet. Larry says then they bury it. Ian says she’s innocent, and Larry asks when they gave a sh*t about that? Ian tells Larry that he was representing her. Larry says now he’s not. Ian doesn’t want to let it get buried, and Larry says he’s too naïve. Travis’s parents and church pay them millions. It’s getting buried. He doesn’t want to hear about it, and Kelly needs another lawyer. He reminds Ian who owns this place. He’s owner and senior partner. If it falls in their lap, he’ll be upset. Ian says he’ll take care of it.

At the station, Kelly freaks about going into the interrogation room. She tells Lushion that she can’t do this again. He tells her to just breathe. She asks if he’ll wait with her, and he says he will. She says her lawyer’s not calling her back. He tells her not to say a word until she gets a lawyer. A man comes in, introducing himself as Tony Isaacs. Kelly says she’s not talking without a lawyer. He tells her that she’s under arrest for the murder of Travis Caine.

Next time, Alex insists she didn’t go over there, Larry tells Randal that he’ll sue, and Brad thinks about leaving.

🔎  Relative Success with Tabatha shows a lot of promise. Tabatha is tackling family businesses this time around. I love how much Tabatha looks like a pixie, and how she hasn’t really changed her style. I’m all for changing it up, but I also think if you find something that looks good on you, keep it. Tonight’s episode was about a large family of pizzeria owners. The father, and main owner, had to decide whether to go with an investor or hand the business over to the kids. Their need was consistent brand identity, and the kids were always at odds about how to run things. Tabatha’s recommendation was to go with the investor, who seemed to want to preserve the family legacy. In the end, the kids came together, and the father amicably parted ways with the investor. Tabatha told us that although she felt the investor was the way to go, the family changed her mind. That’s another thing I like about her, she’s someone who really does own it. She’ll stick to her guns and tell you what’s on her mind, but she admits it when she’s wrong and also keeps an open mind.

Thursday3

 

January 16, 2017 – Josslyn Gets The Talk, Candace Turns Oscar Down, Dorit is Late & Some Fluff

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Josslyn says Carly sounds serious; it must be major. Carly says it is.

Kim tells Oscar that they have to talk.

Michael shows up at the gallery, saying Nelle didn’t need to have the lab results sent to his office. She wanted to make sure he knew they were real, and he says he thought she might want to be there when they were opened. Nelle tells him she already knows what it says, but wouldn’t mind seeing the look on his face when he sees he’s the baby’s father.

At the hospital, Griff asks Ava how it went. She says she has the all clear. In a few hours, her scars, and all the ugliness they represent, will be a bad memory.

Jake visits Drew at the office. He needs to ask a question. It’s Father/Son Day at school next week, and Jake needs him to be there.

Jason and Sonny look at PK Sinclair’s last email. You referred to the sequel. Clearly you haven’t read the ending. Jason says it ends with the son killing the father. Sonny says PK wants to kill Faison.

Carly tells Josslyn that seeing her in the cocktail dress scared her. She looked beautiful and grown up. It’s fun to try on being adult, but she’s fourteen and just discovering who she is. The next few years are pivotal, and Carly doesn’t want her to slingshot to the end. When she tells Josslyn she wants her to slow down, it’s because she wants her to experience all of it. She wants Josslyn to get to know herself and who she is, so she can make big decisions from a place of self-control and responsibility, not because she’s being pressured. Josslyn asks if this is “the talk.”

Oscar can’t believe Kim is doing this in public, but she says she didn’t bring her megaphone. She thinks he needs a refresher course, and asks why is he pretending that what’s happening, isn’t? He asks what she’s talking about, and she asks why Josslyn has condoms. He says it has nothing to do with either of them. Josslyn is holding them for a friend (yeah, I used that one too). Trina is afraid her mom will find them. Kim says they shouldn’t do it, and he says they’re not doing it. She tells him, good, because fourteen is too young.

Nelle tells Michael she would say congratulations, but isn’t sure it’s something he wants to celebrate. He’s glad he knows truth, and she asks if he thought it would say something else. He says, no. His gut told him that it was his baby. Nelle says, so it’s just for his parents. She says Carly is going to hate it, but Michael says all that matters is the baby. Whatever they can do to raise a healthy, happy child, sign him up. She asks what he’s doing next Monday.

Ava tells Kiki that she can’t thank her enough; she doesn’t deserve it. Kiki wants her to feel whole, but tells her to be careful. She doesn’t want Ava to think because her face is fixed, everything else is fine. She needs to figure out what’s going on inside. Ava says she might be pleasantly surprised. Once this horrific chapter is behind her, the rest will fall into place.

Drew tells Jake it must be important. Jake says they eat doughnuts with their dads, show them around the classroom, and do a cool science project together. Drew says if Jake wants him there, he’s there. Elizabeth comes in, and Jake asks if he’s in trouble. Elizabeth says it depends on why he’s there, and Jake says he wanted to tell Drew about Father/Son Day. Elizabeth says she would have brought him, but Jake says he thought maybe she would want him to take the other guy.

Jason tells Sonny there was a backer who Andre never saw. Faison is their best guess, and they have reason to believe the traitor is his son. Jason wants Faison, and wants to know why he did the switch. Sonny says they’re going to figure it out, and use his son to do it

Josslyn says this is coming out of nowhere, and Carly says that’s how she felt when the condoms fell out of Josslyn’s backpack, and no, she wasn’t snooping. Josslyn says she was holding them for a friend, and Carly says that’s the oldest excuse in the book. Josslyn tells her that Trina is seeing a junior, and was afraid her mom would find them. Carly says, thank God; she’s too young. Trina is too young too, but Trina isn’t her daughter. She’s not doing it, is she? Josslyn says no, and Carly asks if they’ve talked about it. Josslyn says, not once. Carly thinks the universe is trying to tell her something, and asks Josslyn to have a seat.

Kim tells Oscar when she heard about the condoms, she was actually happy that at least what she’d told him had sunk in. Oscar says they haven’t even talked about it. Kim tells him if and when they decide, it’s really important that they’re both on the same page, they both feel the same, and want the same things. As much as people say it’s not a big deal, it is. Oscar keeps rubbing his arm, and Kim asks what’s up with that? He tells her that Drew was teaching him some boxing moves and strategies, and it was really cool. Kim says she’s glad they talked, grabs her stuff, and jets, leaving both Oscar and I puzzled.

Nelle tells Michael that maybe he wants to come to her next prenatal visit. She’s having a sonogram, and he can see the baby. She says it’s really cool to listen to its heartbeat; it sounds like a horse galloping. She tells him that Kim thinks it’s important to have the father involved for bonding, but he doesn’t have to be. Michael says he wants to be, and plans to be as involved as he can. The paternity test isn’t the only reason he came to the gallery though. He thinks Ava has an ulterior motive, and that she’s setting Nelle up.

Griff asks if Ava is nervous, but she says she’s energized. She has to run by the gallery to check on an important client. She calls him a guardian angel, and says he saved her.

Jake tells Elizabeth it’s not that doesn’t like Jason; he doesn’t know him. Elizabeth understands, and asks if he feels pressured about having a relationship with Jason. He says no, but she talks about him a lot, and he thought she’d want him to take Jason to the Father/Son Day. She says no one expects that of him; not until he’s ready. He asks, what if he’s never ready, and she says it would be a shame. Jason is a great dad, and he’s lucky to have two amazing fathers. Jake says Jason is a stranger. Elizabeth agrees, but says he didn’t go away because wanted to. He was taken, like Helena took Jake; taken away from everyone he loved and what belonged to him. The cool part is that he didn’t try to grab everything back even though he could have. He respects everyone’s feelings, and loves Jake and Danny. She’s not saying how he should feel, but thinks it’s important that he knows Jason only wants what’s best for him. He’s Jake’s biological father, and she hopes one day when he’s ready, Jake gets to know him.

Sonny tells Jason when he finds Faison, he’s not going to question him; he’s going to kill him. Jason wants answers. Sonny thinks he knows. Obrecht said Faison was looking for an enforcer. It was impossible to have Jason, so he turned him into Drew. Jason wonders if it could be that simple. Sonny says that Jason eliminates quickly and cleanly, and does whatever Sonny asks him to. Who wouldn’t want that? Jason has to hear it from Faison. Sonny says he might be able to, once they smoke him out. Jason asks what Sonny has in mind?

Carly asks Josslyn if other kids are talking about it, and she says, some. Carly asks if they’re doing it or just talking, and Josslyn says, both. Carly suggests she take what she hears with a grain of salt. Kids think sex will make them grow up, and they pretend to do it or actually do before they’re ready. She asks if Trina’s boyfriend is pressuring her. Josslyn doesn’t think so. Trina seems to be into it, and says it’s no big deal. Carly says it is a big deal. It’s intimate and personal, and there’s only once chance for the first time, so it should be memorable. She and Oscar aren’t ready. Josslyn says she seems to be forgetting they’re not having sex. Carly wishes she had waited, and could look back and smile, but she can’t. Her first time was with an older man who didn’t really care about her. Josslyn asks why she did it, and Carly says she wanted to be a woman and make own choices. At the time, it was the biggest choice she could make, but it didn’t make her feel older or cooler, it just complicated things. She wants Josslyn to have a different experience, when she’s older and emotionally ready. She wants Josslyn to be with someone she trusts and feels safe with, in a loving environment, so it can be something she’ll look back on and smile.

Michael tells Nelle that Ava is a liar at best, and a murderer at worst. Nelle says she was the only one who would give her job, and she’s been nothing but kind. Michael says she wants something. He doesn’t know what, but when people get close to her, they get hurt. Nelle thanks him for the warning, but when it comes to Ava, her eyes are wide open. Funny. That’s what Michael told Carly about Nelle.

Griff tells Ava she’ll have confidence of who she is at her core. She dances into her surgery appointment.

Drew loves Jake, and loves being his dad, but Jake owes it to himself to get to know his biological father. Jake asks if it won’t upset Drew, but Drew says Jason is just another person to love him, and that’s a good thing. Jake asks if he’ll still see Drew, and Drew says Jake will get sick of him. Jake says never. Drew says Jake’s mom is right. He knows Jason does the right thing, and that makes him a good guy, but he’s missing out because he has no Jake in his life.

Jason writes an email to PK Sinclair: I can help you get the ending you want. He says, now we wait. Michael calls Jason asking him to meet at Kelly’s. Sonny says he’s going to call Spinelli and have him link the email accounts. Jason leaves, and Sonny says, PK Sinclair, come out, come out, wherever you are.

Carly wonders why Josslyn was telling Oscar that something was going to blow his mind. Josslyn realizes she thought they were talking about sex, and tells her she was clearly wrong. There are new attire guidelines for the dance, and one prohibits kids not dressing according to their gender. There’s one kid who identifies as female, and is being forced to wear a guy’s clothing. Carly thinks it’s awful, and Josslyn says it’s kind of her fault. Her friend has been bullied, so they complained, but instead of punishing the bullies, they’re punishing her with stupid rules. Carly says, good for her, sticking up for her friend, but Josslyn says she’s not done. They decide to throw an alternative dance – come as you are, wear and be want you want. They planned it the same night as the school dance, hoping for a boycott, but it could be grounds for suspension. It’s not ideal, but she’s committed to seeing it through. Carly says she should. Caring for people and doing what feels right is important, and Carly is proud of her.

Griff runs into Kiki, who wonders how is it she never sleeps, but can’t manage to talk to Dillon. He hopes he didn’t make her feel uncomfortable, and Kiki says no. Her mom is way off base. He asks how things are with her and Ava. She says it’s not the first time Ava has hurt her, and it won’t be the last.

Kim bursts into Drew’s office, saying she didn’t raise her son to be soldier. He’s teaching him boxing. What next? Target practice or ROTC? She tells him not to turn Oscar into something he’s not. Drew says, fair enough, but he’s no longer in the Navy. This is what he does now. He doesn’t remember being a SEAL, and is pretty sure he was never a recruiter. He’s not trying to get her son to do anything. Kim apologizes, and says he did nothing wrong.

Michael tells Jason about the paternity results. He’s a father. He’s never been so terrified and excited at the same time. Jason says welcome to parenthood. Michael says he got involved with an unstable woman, and now they’re having a baby. He’s taking responsibility, but what if the baby isn’t okay? Jason says it will be; it will have him.

Sonny tells Carly it’s early for wine, but she says not after the conversation she just had with Josslyn. He asks if she wants to talk about it, and she says not really. Sonny tells her she’s taught Josslyn by example to be strong, confident, and demand respect; sometimes too confident. Carly wonders if they’ll survive the teenage or will it kill her? Sonny says not if he can help it.

Josslyn joins Oscar back at Kelly’s. He asks what was up with her mom, and she says, awkward mom stuff. He knows.

Kim tells Drew she’s been having this conversation for fifteen years, and Drew says, now he suddenly shows up. She says her son was never aggressive, now he’s boxing. Drew explains that Oscar asked him. Apparently, a friend is getting bullied, and he wanted to defend them if necessary. Kim wonders if Oscar was really talking about himself, but Drew says he believes it. Kim says Oscar is a terrible liar, so he’s probably telling the truth. She apologizes for overreacting, saying she barged in and practically accused him of pumping Oscar full of steroids, when Oscar came to him. Drew says it shows he’s a good kid; she’s raising him well.

Ava goes to gallery. Nelle thought she’d be prepping for surgery, and Ava says she’s on her way. She asks about a painting, and Nelle gives her the receipt. Ava says maybe she’s catching on, but asks if that’s the only thing making her smile. She says that, and Michael was there. it went really well, and she might be on her way to being friends with him again. If she plays her cards right, maybe more than that eventually.

Jason tells Michael that he was the first baby he remembers holding. He had no idea, and knew nothing about kids. Michael says he got on the job training, and Jason says Michael taught him how to be father. Michael taught him how to open his heart up to another human being, and he learned to love someone else more than himself. Michael says there’s so much at stake. What if he messes up? Jason says he won’t. He has great instincts. No matter who the mom is, the baby has a right to everything good, and he knows Michael will do that. Michael says his life is going to majorly change, and Jason says, in the best way. There are one and a million amazing things he’ll see; the first times – a smile, words, the first everything, and he’ll be there. Michael says it’s a gift, but terrifying. Jason says he’s happy for him, and happier for the baby. The baby could do worse for a father. Michael says he’s got this. They hug.

Kiki says Ava is lucky to have Griff, but he says he’s the lucky one. The road might be longer and rougher, but he believes today will be a turning point.

Ava tells Nelle it means zip with that family. They forget nothing, and don’t forgive. The Corinthos family has closed their ranks forever to her. Nelle asks what she should do, and Ava tells her to cut her losses, and move on to a new Prince Charming. Anything else is an exercise in futility. Nelle says she’s probably right. The hormones are making her sentimental. Ava tells her to hold down the fort.

Kim tells Drew it will take time; it’s been just them for so long. Drew promises he won’t overstep or try to be an insta-dad if Oscar comes to him. Kim thanks him.

Jason tells Michael to practice deep breathing; he’ll learn as he goes. Michael asks, what about Nelle, and Jason says that’s not his problem. Michael and Jason part company.

Nelle tells the baby not to listen to Ava. Daddy is the only Prince Charming she wants.

Elizabeth takes Jake to Kelly’s. He sees Jason through the window. Jake hesitantly waves. Jason waves back.

Sonny gets a message from PK Sinclair saying they should meet. Jason comes back, and he says Sinclair took the bait; he wants to meet. Is Jason ready? He’s ready.

Tomorrow, Ava is ready to be a new woman, Scotty toasts to Ava, and Ava sees Morgan.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Veronica starts screaming that she smells gas. Melissa tells her to keep screaming. She wanted to take the scenic route, and no one can hear her. She didn’t care that Melissa’s father died, and now it’s her turn. Jeffrey is going to dance on her grave. Veronica keeps calling for help, but Melissa refuses to do anything. She’s going to sit there and wait for Veronica to die. She’s never smelled fried bitch before.

Benny and Mitch drive by and see Melissa sitting near the overturned car. They tell her to get away; the car might blow, but she hopes it does. They realize someone else is in the car. Mitch asks if Melissa is crazy, and she says after dealing with Veronica, it’s a possibility. Mitch runs to get a fire extinguisher. Veronica is going nuts, and Benny tells her to relax so he can help. Benny pulls her from the car.

At the hotel desk, Jim tells Broderick that his room key doesn’t work. Broderick says that’s because it’s not his credit card. Jim says if Broderick doesn’t get him in his room now, there won’t be a need for hotel policy; he’ll burn this bitch to the ground. He says he knows about Broderick and his wife scheming against him. Broderick gives him a new key.

Jim watches the news in his room. The DA says they’re close to making an arrest. The reporter wonders if it’s going to be a Cryer. Jim watches, and says, I know you. Oscar calls, and tells him to open the door. He asks what Oscar has. It’s good news and bad news. His son’s accounts are offshore, but they’re in luck, because he’s a bit of an addict. He went looking for drugs, and a thug got his ATM card, but they were arrested. Oscar thinks they should have recovery in a week. He asks where Jim wants the money to go, and Jim says he’ll text the information. He wants to get in touch with Sarah Duffy at the DA’s office, but no one can know.

Benny tells Melissa to be careful what she says. She says Benny should have let her die; she’s a wicked bitch. Benny thinks Melissa should go to the hospital, but she doesn’t want to. The EMT says it’s policy, although I’m not so sure about that. Veronica begs Benny to go with her to the hospital. Mitch tells him to go ahead, and Benny gets in the ambulance.

A guy does paperwork in Wyatt’s apartment. Wyatt walks in, and he introduces himself as Isaac. He says Anna called to be reassigned, and he was sent over. She’s been compromised because of the two of them sleeping together. Wyatt wants to talk to her, but Isaac says it’s not possible. Wyatt tells him to get out. Isaac knows Wyatt is upset. Anna is a recovering addict, and felt weak with him. Wyatt asks why she didn’t tell him, and Isaac says in the past, that’s how these situations have been handled. Wyatt tells Isaac he’s fired, and hustles him out. Wyatt calls Anna, and leaves a message. He can’t believe she walked out on him like that.

Oscar calls Wyatt, saying he’s with the Savannah police department, and they have someone who tried to use his ATM card. Wyatt says she tried to rob him. Oscar asks her name, and Wyatt tells him it’s Quita. Oscar asks if he wants them to file a report with the bank, but Wyatt says no, and hangs up on him. Oscar calls him an arrogant ass.

In a hotel stockroom, Broderick talks to Rocky, about Jim, saying he’s going to get Jim’s wife. Rocky says revenge is a good way to ruin the plan they have going. Broderick says they need to start making other plans. Rocky thinks they should get more girls, but Broderick isn’t down with that plan anymore. He needs bigger money than that. Rocky doesn’t think Kathryn will be interested, but Broderick says anyone married to a prick like that isn’t happy. He can at least fool her long enough for her to think she is. He tells Rocky that she’s worth $250 million, and Rocky is like, damn, that’s a lot of money. Broderick says he just has to make her feel special and get out. Rocky says everything is about appearance, and no way she’d be seen with him in public on her own. He doesn’t want their plan jeopardized. Broderick says that’s not going to happen.

Hanna sings Amazing Grace as she cleans. The bell rings. It’s a man Kathryn sent to fix the leak. He says he built the place, and introduces himself as Derek. He asks how long it’s been leaking, and Hanna says she just moved in, but she’s just staying until she finds a place. She says she can’t afford it there, and asks if he knows of a place that’s a third of the price. He does, but it’s on the other side of town. She’s fine with that, and he says he’ll leave his card.

The morgue calls. Hanna says she’ll come down and get them. She asks the Lord to help her. Derek has to shut the water off, and asks if she’s okay. She says her grandson was murdered. The morgue found something in his pocket, and she has to go get it. He asks if there’s anything he can do, and she says fix the sink.

Kathryn’s phone rings. It’s Hanna, who tells her about the morgue calling. Kathryn asks if Hanna wants her to go along, but Hanna just wants to know if it’s okay to leave Derek there. Kathryn says he’s completely trustworthy, and to call her when she gets back.

David puts a bed together. Erica says he works fast, and he says she shops fast. He’s hoping she likes the bed, but she thinks it’s a little masculine. He asks her to help him with his feminine side. His phone rings, but he doesn’t recognize the number, so he doesn’t answer.

Candace asks to pay for another night at the hotel, but it’s been paid for a month. She says she must have forgotten, and Broderick tells her it was paid for in cash. She goes to the bar, and Oscar sits next to her. He tells her that he paid the bill, and she asks why. He says he still has the mark, but she says she’s not interested. He asks what’s wrong with her, and why she’s so angry. She says she wouldn’t be if he hadn’t stolen her money. Oscar tells her she’s not getting it back, but he’s trying to help her, and Charles still asks about her. She tells him to leave her alone, and he says he’ll cancel her stay. She’s like, okay, and he wonders what her plan is. Candace says it’s to get him the hell away from her.

Oscar’s phone rings, and he asks about Quita being arrested. Candace asks what he knows about her. He says she robbed someone, and he wants information to do a recovery deal. She asks if it’s Jim, and Oscar says it’s his son; Jim’s trying to get back his inheritance. Candace says it should be easy; he’s an idiot, and Quita is a bigger idiot. She suggests she help him, but he says he’s got this already. He asks if she has any idea what First Ladies make after leaving office. The mark is primed ready to go, and she’d rather bully old men. He asks what happened? She had a fire in her when they met, but now she’s like a regular old whore, waiting for the next john. He says Jeffrey is sitting in jail for a murder she’s responsible for. Candace is surprised to hear that, and Oscar says if he was her, he’d think about securing his future in case Jeffrey decides to talk. He tells her she’s running out of time, and she tells him to get away from her. She calls Veronica, and leaves a message to call her back.

The morgue guy gives Hanna a plastic bag of Quincy Jr’s things. She takes out a piece of paper. It’s a letter that starts with, God, please help… Hanna clutches it to her chest, and says she’s sorry.

Justin gets Jeffrey out of his cell. Again? All the prisoners hoot and holler as they walk past. Justin takes Jeffrey to the interrogation room, and tells him to have a seat. Justin sits on the table and asks if he’s okay. He hates that Jeffrey is in there. He found David’s cell number, but he’s not answering. Jeffrey gives him the password to unlock his phone, and says try calling from there. Justin says he’ll be okay. Jeffrey asks to go back to his cell, but Justin says it’s shift change; they have time. He sits on Jeffrey’s lap and Jeffrey says someone could walk in. Justin says it’s more fun that way, and Jeffrey asks if Justin’s wife thinks it’s fun. He asks if Justin has talked to her. Justin says he doesn’t care; he just cares about Jeffrey. Jeffrey says she could make it worse for him being a judge. Justin says he knows Jeffrey loves him. Jeffrey says he barely knows him, and asks him to stop and just find his dad. Justin says if Jeffrey doesn’t love him, it will mean he did all this for nothing. He tells Jeffrey to say it, and Jeffrey says, I love you; now find his dad. Justin starts kissing him.

Landon asks Charles what’s going on? Charles can’t get his tablet to work. He doesn’t know what he’d do without Landon, and Landon says ditto. Charles says it’s just a job for him, but Landon says he’s wrong. He loves his job, but it’s also his pleasure to work for Charles. He admires and respects him. He hasn’t met anyone like him; he’s real, decent, and honest. He has true compassion for people. He tells Charles that his top-secret clearance is causing his apps not to work, but he’ll take care of it. He says Charles has a late start tomorrow, and asks if he wants to go for a drink. Charles says okay, but as his friend, not his employer.

David pours drinks for himself and Erica. His phone rings and he ignores it. Hers rings, and she decides to do the same. He asks what if it’s her ex, and she says she blocked the number. She looks at the phone, and says it’s her sister. She calls back, and it’s Candace. David wanders away, and Candace says she wants to get this bastard, or Erica’s ass will be dead. Erica says she’s sorry, and asks how she can make it up. Candace says a few hundred grand. Erica asks how much time, and Candace says when she calls back, Erica had better have it. Erica tells David that her sister was just checking up on her.

Veronica is wheeled into the hospital on a gurney, with Benny holding her hand. Hanna is coming toward them, and she and Benny lock eyes.

Next time, Jeffrey won’t talk to the DA, Justin is going to bash someone’s head in, and Melissa harasses Veronica in the hospital.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Dorit needs an uber caffeine boost for her swimwear meeting. She was on the cusp of going to the next level, when she met PK, and postponed her career to start a family. She wouldn’t trade it for anything, but is ready to get back to work. She thinks it’s going to be a killer collection. Nava means beautiful in Hebrew, and is Phoenix’s middle name, so that’s what she’s calling the line. She wants to launch for resort 2017. I’m not sure when this was filmed, but her assistants tell her she’s cutting it short. She thinks the line should reflect her, and it’s agreed that red is having a moment.

Teddi, who is a nice balance for this show, is meeting Dorit for drinks at four. She’s punctual, and believes it’s polite. We’re totally on the same page there. I hate, hate, hate when someone keeps me waiting. It’s disrespectful. She has a glass of wine, and has been waiting for a half hour. In her interview, she says if she wanted to have some wine alone, she would have done it in the comfort of her home. After forty minutes, and a bunch of unanswered texts, she’s calling it a day. As soon as she asks for the check, Dorit tells us she was laser focused on her teleconference meeting. In her interview, Teddi says she’s not an electronical wizard but is pretty sure Dorit could have sent a text while she was on the phone. She tells Dorit, another time, and Dorit babbles that she didn’t realize. Dorit is about fifteen minutes away, but Teddi is like, later. Dorit is all, sorry, sorry, sorry. In her interview, Teddi says thanks for the apology, but it’s a different kind of person who doesn’t even realize they’re that late to meet someone.

Kyle says she doesn’t have swans or horses, but still feels like she has a zoo with all her dogs. Ha-ha! Yes, she does. The little one just peed on the wall. Rich people – they’re just like us. LisaR video chats from Canada. Kyle asks when she’s coming back. She’s filling in for Kelly on Kelly and whoever-it-is-now in the morning. In her interview, LisaR says she was very close to being Regis’s co-host, and does a decent impression of him.

Lisa goes to Vanderpump Dogs and plays with a puppy. She says it’s been a labor of love, and we look at different clips of their progress. She says they were throwing in with another organization, but decided it was too sketchy. She loves having the rescue center, even though it’s riddled with emotional turmoil. Every time they get a dog that was going to be euthanized a good home, it’s worth it. The staff shows her a stray dog they brought in from the street, and she says it looks like Ken. They show their pictures side by side, and by God, she’s right.

Kyle meets Erika for lunch, and orders beet juice. She asks about Tokyo, and Erika had a great time. LisaR’s daughters are doing well on the modeling front, cut her no slack, and it was hilarious. Kyle tells Erica that she has two shows in development. In her interview, Kyle says every time she has an idea, she thinks her sisters will be upset, but she has exceptional stories to tell. Erica tells her about Tom breaking his ankle in a car accident. In her interview, she says he’s a 78-year-old who’s 50. It sounds like the car didn’t make it though.

Erika confers with her assistant. They talk about jet lag, how you think you’re cool, and then you’re not, and I identify. Erika tells him about Tom’s accident, and says it could have been worse. In her interview, she says she realized that one day she’ll be alone, and things can change in a moment. It’s the first time she’s seen Tom not super human. He’s in a lot of pain, and he doesn’t like to acknowledge it. She saw a flash of fear, and she’d never seen that before. It’s scary.

Kyle visits Teddi’s gym. Teddi says for the first five minutes, Kyle might hate her. Instructor Adam teaches them on a climbing machine. Teddi says Kyle did better than she did the first time. Afterward, they go to a porridge bar, which I’ve never heard of, but sounds intriguing. Kyle gets a juice, and Teddi gets a salad. Where’s the porridge? Kyle tells Teddi that Dorit claimed she was twenty minutes late meeting Teddi, and she was annoyed. Teddi says she was waiting almost an hour. She gets it if someone is busy, but she hired a nanny for the kids and is there waiting, and Dorit couldn’t even text saying she was going to be late.

LisaR checks into the NYC hotel. Wow. A fruit plate, champagne, and all kinds of stuff. She immediately wipes down everything with alcohol wipes, then calls Harry. She tells him she’s been getting texts that are saying he’s mean, and he says he’s being firm. He’s determined to get the girls in shape. In her interview, LisaR says he’d say she was the more lenient parent. They talk about Amelia doing her own laundry. Amelia FaceTimes with her, and doesn’t understand why she’s being subject to such menial tasks. In her interview, LisaR says she wants to prepare them to be on their own. She knows it sounds like stuff everybody should do, but everybody doesn’t.

Dorit meets Kyle at a Mexican place for lunch, and manages to be on time. Dorit talks about being tardy only six minutes, and says it’s an unfair recollection of the truth. In her interview, she says they were supposed to meet at four thirty. Teddi’s leaving was abrupt, and she doesn’t understand why it happened. Kyle says she’d never wait an hour for anyone. I WANT HER EARRINGS. They’re rose gold tassels, and HUGE. Kyle talks about selling her show ideas. She starts to cry, telling Dorit how her mom was all about the girls sticking together, and a victory for one, was a victory for them all. She doesn’t feel like she can call them about it though. She doesn’t know the reaction she’d get, and her parents are gone, so she kept it to herself. She says she and her sisters used to talk every day, but it changed after she produced American Woman. She says the shows are inspired by her life, and not theirs. She tells us Mauricio worked for her brother-in-law for years, and when he struck out on his own, it changed the family dynamic.

LisaR tells the hair guy to make it look not frizzy. She talks about teasing Regis that she’d the next co-host. Kelly was perfect, but she was close, and loves coming back. She says the first time she co-hosted was seventeen years ago. If she had gotten the job, their lives would be different. When Harry said how happy he was in Beverly Hills, she knew it was right because, family first. I loved the show that she co-hosted with Ty Treadway, Soap Talk. Alas, it was on the Soap channel, that also is no more.

Hanky! Panky! Dorit visits LVP at Villa Rosa. But not long enough.

Kyle meet Camille and Teddi for lunch. They’re waiting for LisaR coming in from New York. Kyle asks if Teddi has talked to Dorit.

LVP and Dorit go out for lunch. LVP asks about Dorit having another baby, but she’s swaying toward not doing it. She has two toddlers, plus PK, and is starting the swimwear line. She’d be crazy to throw another baby in the mix. Dorit tells LVP about how upset Kyle was, not being able to share her success with her sisters. LVP is surprised that she was that open with someone she doesn’t know well. Dorit says she feels that they’ve bonded and have a connection. In her interview, LVP is surprised that Kyle was so overcome with emotion, and was showing it to Dorit. Dorit says she’s put off by Teddi right now.

Teddi isn’t irritated about Dorit being late anymore, but it bothers her that she changed it to twenty minutes.

Dorit shows LVP Teddi’s text at 4:36.

Teddi shows the girls the text where Dorit thought they were supposed to meet between 4:30 and 5:30. She wonders who gives between an hour to meet at a restaurant?

Dorit says she couldn’t have apologized more, but Teddi couldn’t wait any longer, even though she was ten minutes away. Another five minutes shaved off.

Teddi says she thought she could just get over it, but then Kyle said Dorit claimed she was only twenty minutes late.

Dorit says Teddi Claims she was kept waiting fifty-four minutes. She’s exaggerating times, and making her out to be an idiot and a bad guy.

Kyle says Dorit told her that she was six minutes late. In her interview, Camille says Dorit is a little bit self-absorbed, and a bottomless pit of BS. Teddi says she understands if you can’t make it, but don’t lie about it.

Dorit says she has strict time restraints that others might not understand. I choke on my coffee. LVP gets how important that can be, and says a friend gives you slack. LVP changes the subject to Dorit calling Camille a stupid c-word.

Camille says she was bringing David around for the first time, and she was nervous enough. She was embarrassed. She thinks Dorit talks and drinks too much, and might be desperate for attention. In her interview, Kyle thinks saying someone drinks too much is a big deal. I don’t. Dorit was talking too much because she was drinking too much. Kyle brings up LVP using the word, but Dorit isn’t British. It’s true. They don’t think as much of that word as we do.

Dorit says she doesn’t have an issue with Camille, but was just being stupid. LVP suggests Dorit look at it from Camille’s POV. She has a new boyfriend, and introduced him to the group for the first time. A light bulb comes on over Dorit’s head, as she realizes she might have been rude.

Camille says Dorit hurt her feelings. She was inappropriate, and it really is a nasty word.

LVP says Dorit can mess with her, but some people don’t have the same sense of humor. Maybe she needs to apologize. Dorit wonders why she always puts her foot in her mouth.

Camille says she’s getting Dorit a ball gag as a gift. In her interview, Kyle says Dorit’s mouth is like a tennis ball machine. LisaR arrives. She tells them how much fun she had, then blurts out that she knows “this little thing.” A “little lawsuit thing” with LVP. Allegedly something happened with Ken and a woman who was running a charity. Perhaps the sketchy organization LVP referred to? Allegedly, Ken assaulted her somehow. Kyle says assault implies physical violence, and he’d never do that. Ever. She tells LisaR that’s hard to believe, and gives her the evilest eye ever. I don’t buy it either. And little lawsuit thing? That’s just distasteful.

Next time, LVP attacks Kyle with a dog hair dryer, Harry talks to LisaR about the boys being after the girls, LVP addresses LisaR, and Kyle and Teddi have it out.

🏄  Summer House is returning – Monday, January 22, at 10 pm. I’m not sure why. I kinda, sorta, half-assed watched its first season, but once crossover Stassi (Vanderpump Rules) was gone, so was my interest. It’s like a mini Real World, but with older “kids.” Definite train wreck watching.

🍲 For those who like their cooking competitions with a Spanish flair, MasterChef Latino airs on Telemundo Sunday nights. Although I’ve enjoyed watching The Beastmaster in Spanish, I didn’t actually watch this show, but noticed it skimming around the digital guide, and thought it worthy of a mention.

To celebrate the middle of the week, employees at Gortney Industries built an actual hump.

Wednesday4

 

January 10, 2018 – PC’s Mayoral Candidates Meet, Teresa Visits Joe #1 in Prison, Twice the Tyler & Tabatha is Back

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Jim tells Franco that he dated his mom when Franco was a kid. He was an artist even back then; a regular Jackson Pollock. Jim says he used to get into all kinds of things. Franco doesn’t remember him, and asks what he’s doing there.

Olivia-Q tells Ned that Port Charles has been home for more years than it hasn’t, and now he’s raising a family there. Ned says she’ll be the perfect politician’s wife; beautiful, stylish, down-to-earth, competent, and she can get things done. She says before you know it, she’ll be feeding cannoli to the entire town. Ned says she’s right. He’s running for mayor. Olivia says there’s the man she married; the man who can do and be anything he puts his mind to. He asks if he can count on her vote, and she tells him he can count on anything from her. She’s going to be one helluva campaign manager, and together, nothing can stop them.

At Charlie’s, Doc tells Laura it’s her chance to be a champion for the city she loves. Laura says he’s right. She’s running for mayor. He says at last she sees reason, and she says she knows he wasn’t going to let up. He tells her that he knows how important it is to her. She says after meeting Jim, it was clear that someone needs to push him back, and it’s her. Doc says, hallelujah, calls her madam mayor.

Charlotte sees Laura through the window, and runs in, shouting, grandma! She tells Laura about her skating, and Laura says she can’t wait to see her in the Olympics. Charlotte shows off her outfit. She tells Laura that she got another one from a nice lady named Cassandra, but Nina made her return it.

Valentin’s doorbell rings. It’s Jordan. He asks if he should call his attorney, but she says she’s just tying up loose ends regarding Cassandra. Her assistant confessed to putting her in a coma, and she wonders why Valentin visited him shortly after he was arrested.

Finn tells Anna that he doesn’t need a babysitter. She tells him she got flowers. They’re probably not as nice as the ones he got, but they’ll do. He asks, do what? and she says Cassandra sabotaged their New Year’s Eve dinner, and they’re going to have one. He didn’t know it was going to be tonight, and she says why wait. They can say a proper farewell to their partnership.

Elizabeth points out that Franco went out for milk, and came back with champagne. She tells Jim that they just set a date for their wedding, and Jim congratulates them. Elizabeth invites him in, and he promises to keep it brief. He tells Franco he’s come a long way, and calls him Bobby, but then says he’s now Franco, the famous artist. Franco says Jim knows a lot about him, and Jim says everyone has heard of him. He and Betsy also keep in touch. He says she’s proud of him, and Franco says she has a funny way of showing it. Jim thinks they must have had a misunderstanding, but Franco says he’s not discussing it with him. Jim says it has to be; Betsy thinks world of him, and he was her world when he was a kid. Franco asks why Jim suddenly turned up now. Did Franco’s mom send him?

Olivia toasts to the future mayor. Ned reminds her that any number of people might want to join in the race, but she says they don’t have his pedigree. He says it’s a pedigree with a checkered history. She tells him Jim obviously wants to do business with him, but Ned says that’s before he quit his job. She says he didn’t quit; he pivoted. He saw a need and followed his conscience. He says he’ll need an ally in city government.

Laura tells Charlotte that if it didn’t fit, Nina would have to return it. Nina says it wasn’t appropriate, because the nice lady turned out to be not so nice. She and Charlotte leave to get hot chocolate (the official drink of Port Charles), and Doc asks what Laura thinks. She says he’s the shrink, so he should tell her.

Valentin tells Jordan that Eric tied him and Anna up, and was prepared to kill them both. He wanted to look Eric in the eye, tell him to enjoy prison, and that he’d be waiting when he gets out. And yes, it was a threat. Jordan doesn’t think Eric was feeling guilty or had something to gain. She’s skeptical that the confession happened so early on. Maybe someone paid for his attack of conscience.

Finn toasts to the glamorous life of a secret agent. He tells Anna she has a lovely laugh when she’s not doing her Emma Peel thing. She says she can laugh when she’s not inflicted with his irony. Even though they were fake dating for a while, they know little about each other. Finn says he’ll always be an addict, but Anna says it doesn’t scare her. She asks if he was cynical as baby, or did he grow into it? He asks if she was always playing cops and robbers, but she says it wasn’t that. She wasn’t weird, but wasn’t like the other girls; she was solitary and secretive. Finn says he was loner, and Anna says what a shocker. He says too bad they didn’t get the chance to know each other, and find out who likes Van Gogh, and who thinks caviar is overrated. She says, and who sleeps naked, and they both raise their hands. Finn says finally something in common. She gets up and starts to walk past him, and in the smoothest move ever, he grabs her arm, stands and kisses her.

Jim says Franco hasn’t changed; he was always a tough nut to crack. He sees the painting of the brothers, and says it’s fascinating, and asks what the inspiration was. Franco tells him it’s always life. It appears to be one thing, and ends up being something else. Jim says he’ll just put it out there. He’d like to buy Franco’s art studio.

My friend George Stephanopoulos interrupts. Yay. A news conference with the Norwegian prime minister. Because something like that can’t wait a half hour. I tried YouTube, but the quality was so bad today, it just wasn’t worth it for a few minutes.

Jordan tells Finn that she assumes Cassandra had a computer. Finn says she had a laptop, and Jordan says it’s missing.

Valentin tells Anna he couldn’t have drugged Cassandra, since he was with her. Cassandra’s operation just lost tens of millions of dollars. Maybe someone wanted to express their displeasure. Charlotte runs in, telling Valentin that the costume Nina got her is much nicer than the one from Cassandra. Nina glares at Anna.

Valentin talks to Charlotte in French, and says it’s past her bedtime. Anna tells her sweet dreams, and Nina takes her upstairs. Valentin asks if they’re done, and Anna says she got what she came for. He asks if it ever occurred to her that Finn put Cassandra in a coma. She asks if it matters. It’s all tied off now. Valentin says strange as it might seem, it was a pleasure doing business with her. She laughs, and says strange as might seem, it was.

Olivia tells Doc the ink of the marriage license isn’t even dry, and he’s encouraging his wife to run for office. He says she and Ned are still newlyweds, and ditto. At the same time, Ned and Laura both say they love Port Charles and want to do what’s best for everyone who lives there. Laura says they need someone to fight for their town, and it’s her. Ned says they need someone to bring their town into the  21st century. The press shows up, and both Doc and Olivia say they sent for them.

Finn tells Jordan that maybe the laptop was destroyed. She says if that’s the case, they failed miserably, since the information is in the cloud. They’ll find it, and it will lead to the rest of the operation. She tells him she’ll call Anna later. As she’s leaving, she says she knows they pretended to be involved as part of being undercover. Finn says he was just following orders. Jordan says she’s been in a similar situation, and had to learn the hard way. It’s one thing when there’s danger in the air, but when things settle down and go back to normal – whatever normal is – you realize how much you really don’t know about each other. It’s none of her business, but she hopes things are different for them. She leaves, and Finn looks at the flowers.

Nina comes back down. Valentin tells her that Anna left; she had questions about New Year’s Eve. Nina says, omg, she figured it out. We flash back to Valentin finding Nina at the MetroCourt. She says she was nervous. She didn’t know what to do or how to rescue him. He asks how she knew he needed to be rescued, and she says Cassandra told her. He asks when she saw Cassandra.

Nina bangs on Anna’s door, yelling that Valentin is missing and they need to talk. The door is unlocked, and she goes inside. Cassandra is there with the syringe, and says Anna is with her husband, but not for long. Anna will be dead soon, and Valentin will live long enough to suffer. Nina tells her not to hurt him, but Cassandra says Nina is the one who did, making him love her. She’s going to kill Nina and their daughter. They struggle, and Nina plunges the syringe into Cassandra, who keels over. Nina runs out.

Valentin tells Nina that was the end of that, but she says what if the nightmare is just beginning? He says when he found her at the MetroCourt, he never wanted to let her go. She’s glad she told him. We flash back to the MetroCourt again. Valentin tells Nina they have to call the police. Nina says she spent time in a mental institution for assault, and they’ll use it against her. She has a new life, and begs him not to make her go back to the old one. He says he understands, and will take care of everything.

They both go to Anna’s house. There’s no answer, and Valentin goes inside. He tells Nina to come in. Cassandra is on the floor, and Nina asks if she’s alive. He says barely. He takes out the syringe, and wipes it. He asks if she’s sure they weren’t in the living room; there are signs of a struggle. Nina says no, and he tells her he’ll clean it up to be on the safe side. He fixes up everything, and picks Cassandra up. They leave with her. In the present, Valentin says he regrets his past, but it afforded him certain skills, and he’ll always protect her.

Laura pledges to run a clean campaign, and allow Port Charles to decide who they want for mayor. Ned says it will be a fair fight, and may the best candidate win. Doc tells Laura that he couldn’t be more proud. The next stop is the mayor’s mansion. Olivia tells Ned the same thing. Jim says Ned has his full support. Ned needs someone to share his vision of what Port Charles can be. Laura sees them, and says, game on.

Franco rips up Jim’s card. Elizabeth asks if he’s sure, and he says he has a firm rule – don’t do business with people who call him Bobby. He suggests the crack the champagne and celebrate setting the date.

Anna comes back home, but there’s no Finn. She sees a note by the flowers. It says, Good news. The MetroCourt had a suite available. Roxie and I are going back to where we belong. Back to normal – whatever normal is.  

Valentin takes out a laptop. He deletes Cassandra’s photo of Claudette, and says, in the past.

Tomorrow, Maxie talks to Peter about a mutual friend, Julian says someone is trying to send him a message, and Curtis finds something.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey

This might be the finale, but it’s doubtful I will ever get Siggy’s loudmouth voice out of my head. I heard she’s not coming back. Good.

Margaret and Marge Sr. go to check out Margaret’s dress for her 50th birthday. She feels like a young girl because she’s delusional (her word); she’ll always be in her twenties in her head. I like the mermaid style, but it’s a white burnout pattern which isn’t for me. The collar is also a little high. Danielle joins them. She asks if Margaret finds Siggy rational at all, and Margaret says no. She hopes Siggy can hold it together at her party. Margaret tries another size, and I’m loving it on her, especially the cutout back.

Siggy and son Josh go tuxedo shopping for prom. She can’t believe he’s graduating high school, and will be leaving her soon. She wants to spend every moment with him. He’s made a decision about college. It’s only 3½ hours from the house, and she promises Josh that she’ll be there every weekend, totally freaking him out.

Melissa and Joe #2 arrive with the kids for Teresa’s birthday. Melissa has the kids hide. Teresa comes in and asks her dad what’s for dinner, and they all pop out. The kids wrote letters of appreciation, and read them to her. She feels badly for them, and knows they take their frustration out on her, but they also wow her. She thinks maybe she didn’t do so bad. She tells them she’s going to see daddy this weekend, and asks who’s coming. Gia has cheerleading, and won’t be able to. Teresa hasn’t been there since her mother died. In his interview, Joe #2 says it’s a long time. She might say it’s because she’s busy, but he knows she’s angry. He thinks she’s afraid to show Joe #1 her anger. Teresa tells us that she wants an apology, and needs to express it, or it won’t be a good thing. She wishes her mom was there, but is happy she has the girls.

Dolores goes with the two Franks to the bowling alley where Frankie hangs out with his friends. Dolores says when Frank first moved in, she worried about them getting along, but they’ve worked it out as a family. They’re savoring the last few weeks before he goes to college. She doesn’t know how long she and Frank will be living together. People want to put their relationship in a box, but all that matters is that they’re happy. Dolores gets a gutter ball, and Frank says at least she’s getting better. I think my high score is 90, so no judgement.

Margaret’s housekeeper is excited that there will be disco dancing at the party. Interior decorator Joyce arrives, and Margaret is thrilled about the renovation. She’s hoping when Joe #3 sees the rendering, he’ll get in gear. He’s not keen on all the white. Again, not my taste, but it’s beautiful. Margaret says it won’t be done before the party, but she’s hired someone to make it look fabulous.

Teresa heads out with the girls, minus Gia, to see Joe #1. The last time she had to turn around, because her mom was in the hospital. She feels like it’s Joe’s fault that she lost time with her mother. Milania wishes they could rewind time, and so does Teresa. In her interview, she says life sucks. She doesn’t like bringing up serious stuff around the girls, but wants them to know Joe is sorry for letting them down. Cameras aren’t allowed inside the prison, so we don’t see the visit.

The girls say it was an amazing visit, and they love their dad. Teresa tells us that she got choked up, and the courage she built up, went away.

Joe #2 and Melissa go to Jonathan Adler, the store Margaret would like gifts from. Joe wonders if Joe #1 apologized. He says he’s never heard Teresa talk like this before, and thinks she might walk if he doesn’t. Melissa agrees. Teresa joins them. Melissa asks if there was resentment. Teresa says she was nervous and emotional. She told her husband that what he did wasn’t just to her, but their daughters, and she wanted to hear he’s sorry. He asked if she’s read his letters where he’s written it a million times, but she told him that she wanted to hear it right from his lips. Everyone ended up crying. In his interview, Joe #2 says Joe #1 is the hardcore old-school Italian, and not the type for apologies, but he cracked. Teresa says she thinks about her mom, and when he comes home how it will be different because she won’t be there. She says everyone makes mistakes, and Melissa says it was a big one. Teresa says he’d better make it up to her when he comes home

Josh is ready for prom. Siggy drags out childhood photos. What’s with the white burnout pattern? Josh’s girlfriend is wearing a similar dress to Margaret’s birthday gown, but  with a more youthful skirt, and a plunging neckline that I like much better. Siggy says their relationship isn’t going to end because he’s leaving, and she’ll get through it.

Margaret says tonight is the big night, and she’s a train wreck. Her party planner insists he can do magic. And he does. It looks amazing. She wants to leave it until the renovation, and Joe #3 says it is the renovation.

Dolores calls her boyfriend, but there’s no answer. She says she has respect for his work, but he needs a life too. Frank is coming with her to the party. For now, he’s filling the void, but she doesn’t know if it’s going to be okay in the future.

Siggy says she and Margaret don’t have great chemistry. Margaret is so insensitive, Siggy can’t believe she’s gracing Margaret with her presence going to Margaret’s party.

Margaret says Dolores looks like if Diana Ross and Sophia Loren had a baby. Dolores says Siggy is running late, and hopes things are cool when she gets to the party. Everything is all Studio 54 and disco balls. For her grand entrance, Margaret is hoisted onto a horse statue, and led into the party. I guess this is supposed to parallel Bianca Jagger‘s Studio 54 entrance? She thanks everyone for coming. She says she’s lived a blessed life, and starts to cry. In her interview, she tells us the only thing missing is her kids. She can look back when she’s 90, and remember that she was a lucky girl. In her interview, Dolores says they’ve had a bumpy road, but Margaret understands her relationship with Frank. The dancing commences.

One of the guests tells Margaret she’s heard a rumor. Dolores gets a text. Everyone is looking at their phones. Margaret tells Danielle that Siggy isn’t coming, and might be in the hospital. Some people will do anything to get out of an invite.

Margaret makes the rounds. Dolores says Siggy fell. Melissa hopes she isn’t hurt, but wonders what the chances are that she fell on the way to Margaret’s party. She thinks if it’s an excuse, it’s genius. Danielle talks about Siggy being a jerk, and Dolores calls Danielle a slob. In her interview, Dolores says if Siggy didn’t want to come, she would have said no. We flash back to Siggy being a moron throughout the season. Teresa doesn’t think she’d fake an injury, and doesn’t want to question it. Everyone gets texts except Margaret, but Margaret doesn’t think Siggy is crazy enough to fake it. She’s kind of glad, thinking the night will be drama free.

Melissa announces that she’s tipsy. Joe asks Melissa if she’s saying Siggy threw herself down some stairs. He says she was crazy enough to embarrass Melissa at her party, and we flash back to that. She also called Melissa trash, and the cherry on top, she defended Kim D. Melissa says you should always have a way out, and cheers to her. Dolores tells Frank that Danielle is looking to pick a fight with Siggy.

Apparently, Siggy has fallen down eighteen stairs (she counted), and has a sprained ankle and a contusion on her arm. She tells husband Michael that she still has to go to the party, since she keeps getting texts from Dolores, saying Danielle is talking about her. She’ll go in, do what she has to do, and get out. What is she? The Mafia? She wants to steal Dolores, Teresa and Melissa out of the party. Is there no end to this woman’s rudeness? What boggles my mind is that she keeps saying how insensitive Margaret is, yet she wants to take guests away from her party. I’m so glad she’s not going to be on the show anymore. With time, the urge to hunt her down and smack her in the face will pass. True story. My husband was going to San Francisco for his job around the time Puck was still on The Real World. I told him if he saw Puck, to smack him. He was at a gas station, and asked the attendant if he knew where Puck was, because his wife wants him to punch Puck in the nose. The attendant had no idea what he was talking about, and possibly thought he was crazy.

Nice of Siggy to hobble in and steal Margaret’s birthday thunder. Teresa is under the mistaken impression that her appearance means she wants to make things better with Margaret. Siggy explains she missed a step in her heels. Dolores calls Danielle over. Melissa jokes that Siggy threw herself down the stairs to avoid the party. Siggy says she loves herself too much for that, and in her interview, says she can’t believe Melissa drank the Kool-Aid. Melissa tells us that Siggy has a point. No one loves Siggy more than Siggy. Siggy admits she didn’t want to come, and in her interview, Margaret says there’s no reason she should have come if she didn’t want to. And she had nothing to worry about in coming. Margaret never publicly called her names or was deliberately rude, and when they made up, she thought they actually had. Siggy is the game player, not her.

Margaret says Siggy was very nice about it when she invited her to the party. Siggy says she doesn’t want to be friends. She just came to be with Melissa and Teresa. Teresa says she must be there to wish Margaret a happy birthday, and in her interview, Melissa calls Siggy a mega-bitch. She’s not asking her to be BFFs with Margaret, but just be cordial. Margaret tells Siggy that if she doesn’t want to be there, she should go. In her interview, Siggy says God is good, like someone had been holding her hostage. Dolores decides to leave with her. She thinks Siggy isn’t in the right frame of mind. She’s in pain, and annoyed that everyone said she was copping out of coming to the party. Melissa wonders who comes to a party and says that sh*t? Especially when she had an out if she didn’t want to come.

Teresa insists that Siggy must have come a little for Margaret, but Siggy says she doesn’t want to be a phony. Someone needs to explain the difference between being a phony and being a polite human being. Teresa says Siggy’s behavior hasn’t been the best, but she’s known Siggy longer, and she’s been there for her. We flash back on their friendship. Teresa feels badly for Siggy, and decides to leave with her. Dolores is glad Teresa sees where her loyalty should lie. Again, is this Mob Wives? Melissa can’t believe Teresa left without even telling her, since they came together.

They have the end blurbs, but apparently no one on this show has done anything very interesting. The most noteworthy thing was that Joe #1 was transferred to a new prison. Melissa says they’re a group divided, but she knows she’s on the side of right.

Next time, the Reunion.

If Loving You is Wrong

Tyler Perry – round two!

Some noise wakes Natalie. She wakes Lushion, saying she thinks she heard gunshots. She knows she did She quietly goes to the window.

Travis lies dead in front of Kelly’s door. Kelly tiptoes to Justice’s room, and goes inside. He’s sleeping, and she gets in the bed with him. He asks if she’s okay. She says everything is fine.

Natalie goes back to the bedroom, and tells Lushion he needs to get up. She saw Travis’s car. That gets him up. He gets his gun, and tells her to stay in the house.

Lushion calls for Kelly. He sees blood coming out from under her door. He yells for Natalie to call the police and an ambulance. He goes inside, and calls to Kelly. He asks if she’s all right, and she tells him to keep his voice down; Justice is asleep. He asks what happened, and she starts talking about putting Justice to bed. Lushion says, no, what happened here? Doesn’t she see a man on her floor? She’s like, Travis, oh yeah. He tells her call an ambulance, but she says she wants him to die. Lushion says he still has a pulse, and they have to save him. Kelly asks, why? So he can keep torturing her? She starts to go back to bed, and Lushion tells her to stay there. She says she shot him. Lushion calls 911, but they already got a call. Kelly is totally out of it, and keeps saying she shot him, and doesn’t want him to live.

Lushion asks what happened; did he break in? Kelly says he was at the window, and the alarm didn’t go off. Lushion asks again if he broke in, but she says she let him in. Natalie tries to come through the front door that Travis is blocking. Lushion tells her to leave, and Kelly says she shot him. Lushion asks for the gun, and she points to it on the counter. He needs her to understand, and asks how Travis got in. She says she opened the door. Lushion is freaking out, and tells her not to say anymore. Kelly says he kept banging and saying let him in. She let him in and shot him, and kept shooting, and shooting, and shooting. Lushion needs her to focus. He says she’s in shock. She shakes her head, but he says he needs her to do something. Don’t say a word. She says she did it. She shot him, and that’s what happened. Lushion tells her the police will be here, and don’t say that.

He asks Natalie to come in, and tells her to look at him as she walks around Travis. He needs her to take Kelly and justice next door, out the back. He tells her to watch her step. Kelly asks where she’s going? Lushion tells her it’s okay, just go. He needs her to be quiet. Poor Lushion. He always has to fix everything. He makes a call to Ian, waking him.

Ian says it’s late. Lushion says, sorry, but there’s a problem. Kelly shot Travis. This wakes Ian up real fast. He asks where, and if Travis is dead, and Lushion says at Kelly’s house, and he has a pulse. Ian asks if the cops are there, but Lushion says they’re on their way. Ian says he is too. Lushion says he’ll try to keep her away from them and making a statement, but hurry.

Lushion keeps saying, damn, Kelly. He tells Travis to hang in there.

Marcie is all weepy. She tells Brad she’s an idiot. First she marries Randal, then throws herself at Brad. Brad says she’s human, and she says another word for weak. He says she’s one of the strongest women he knows. He really loves her, but loves his wife too. It doesn’t make her less special; it just makes the timing wrong. She asks if it will ever be right, but he doesn’t think so. His phone rings. It’s Alex, but he decides not to answer. He doesn’t want to make her jealous and upset. Marcie says she already is. She’s been threatening to tell Randal that Marcie is pregnant, and wants her to stay away from Brad. Brad says he’ll talk to her.

Alex calls again, and Brad answers. She tells him to hurry home. There were gunshots next door, and the police are there. He says he’s on his way. Marcie plays a message of Randal asking if she’s pregnant, and insists it must have been Alex who told him. No. It was that drunk idiot Larry.

Natalie gives Kelly some water. Esperanza is there, and asks if she’s okay. Kelly says he just wouldn’t stop; she shot him. Esperanza says she’s sorry, and Kelly says don’t be; she isn’t. Esperanza says she has to talk to the police at some point, and she can’t say that. Kelly says he deserved to die for what he did. She starts to freak, and they hold her back and get her into a chair. Natalie says she’s not talking to anybody. Kelly asks if they know what he did to her, and says she’s not okay. She’s going to lose her job, her credit is bad, and he raped her. It was the day Lushion came over and she said nothing happened. She starts to freak again, and the girls calm her down. Natalie says, self-defense.

Travis is taken away in the ambulance. Brad and Marcie pull up. Brad asks Lushion what happened? Lushion says Kelly shot him. Marcie asks if he’s okay, but Lushion says they don’t know. She asks where Kelly is, and Lushion says his house, so Marcie heads over. Alex comes out, and Brad asks if she’s okay. She says she is, and Lushion asks how many gunshots she heard. She says a lot. Brad gripes about Kelly having a gun, but Lushion says just think what would have happened if she hadn’t had it. If it hadn’t been him, it would have been her. Brad says she brought it to the neighborhood, but I’m not sure if he means the gun or the problem of Travis. Lushion says it’s over now, and Alex and Brad go home.

Alex says, it’s sad, and Brad says it’s sad she told Randal that Marcie is pregnant. She says she didn’t do that, and Brad says she threatened to. She admits she did, but didn’t follow through. Brad says she couldn’t wait for him to leave so she could go over there. Alex insists she did nothing, and Brad asks why Randal left a nasty message on Marcie’s phone? Alex says he’s having a hard time believing her, and asks if this is how it’s going to be now? He’ll get to choose whether he believes her or not. She didn’t go over there, and didn’t tell Randal anything. She asks if he believes her, but he doesn’t answer.

Ian arrives, and I wonder why the cops didn’t stick around. Lushion meets him, and Ian asks for the details. Lushion says Kelly claims she shot him. She opened the door and turned off the alarm. That’s not what she said. She said the alarm didn’t go off. Lushion didn’t have his listening ears on, as Judge Judy would say. Ian asks if Travis is okay, but Lushion says they don’t know. Ian says his family is going to make it difficult. His father is the biggest pastor around, and there are nothing but lawyers and judges in the congregation.

Natalie lets Ian in. Kelly says she shot him. Ian says he knows, and asks for privacy.

Larry and Randal are passed out on the couch. Upstairs, Eddie’s arms are cuffed to opposing walls, and he’s wearing a bondage costume. He tries to slide his phone over with his foot. Lushion gets a call. He sees it’s Eddie and he’s not answering. Lushion tells the women that Kelly said she opened the door and turned the alarm off. Esperanza says she lured him in to kill him. She’s praying Kelly didn’t call him over there, and asks how she had a gun. The one she had is in evidence. Natalie says it was hers. Eddie was in Alex’s backyard, and scared her, so Natalie gave it to her. Esperanza says Natalie can be in a lot of trouble. Lushion says, especially if he dies. Eddie calls again, and Lushion refuses to answer.

Eddie calls one more time, and Lushion asks what he wants. Eddie says it’s not a joke; he’s in serious trouble. Lushion says he’s not helping, but Eddie says Lushion is all he’s got. He’s at Randal’s. Lushion asks what he’s done now, and Eddie says they have him chained up. He begs Lushion to get him. Lushion says he has a lot going on, and Eddie says he’ll explain, just please help. Lushion doesn’t want to know. He tells Eddie to stop calling, and hangs up. Natalie asks what’s going on, and Lushion says Eddie is talking crazy, saying he’s chained up at Randal’s house. Marcie wonders why Larry is there this late; she saw his car. Lushion asks if he knows Eddie. Esperanza’s phone rings, and it’s Eddie. I’m laughing my ass off.

Lushion tells her go for it. Eddie says he needs help, and she says she knows that. BA-DUM-CHH! She asks what he did, and he says he’s in Randal’s house, chained up upstairs. It’s the same thing he told Lushion. Natalie thinks they should go see, but Lushion says no. Marcie thinks Larry’s car being there is weird, and realizes he must have told Randal about her pregnancy. Eddie calls Esperanza again, and they decide to go over there.

Lushion knocks on the door, and Marcie uses her key to let them in. Randal pops up from the couch, and tells them to get out. Lushion asks him to call Eddie, but Randal says he’s tied up (groan). Larry says he doesn’t have a warrant, but Marcie says it’s still her house, and they need to talk to Eddie. Lushion asks to take a look upstairs, but Randal says no. Marcie says it’s okay, but Larry says if he goes upstairs, it will be the last time Lushion will work this beat. Randal tells them to get out of his house, but Marcie tells him to shut up. Randal wants to know about the baby. Idiot.

Lushion goes through the rooms upstairs. He finds Eddie, and says, wth? Eddie asks for help, and Lushion says he thought he’d seen it all. Eddie says just get him out of there. Lushion says he’ll get the key. Eddie wants his gun. Lushion goes downstairs, and asks what’s happening. Randal and Larry act like they don’t know anything, and Larry says his client has nothing to say. Lushion says Eddie is chained upstairs; give him the key. They both act ignorant. Marcie says, let’s go upstairs to the girls. Lushion tries to stop them, but not too hard. He asks if he has to call a locksmith, and Larry says they don’t know what he’s talking about.

The girls are stunned to see Eddie hanging there. Esperanza takes a picture with her phone, and closes the door. They go back down, and outside. Lushion dials a locksmith, but Larry throws him the key, saying his work here is done. Lushion says don’t think about moving. He doesn’t know who Larry is, but if they kidnapped Eddie, he’s going to jail. Larry says, we’ll see. They didn’t put Eddie in that position; he did it himself. Lushion balks at this idea, and Larry says he’s very limber. Randal suggests Lushion ask him about it. Lushion goes back upstairs with the key.

Lushion tells Eddie this is beyond the call of duty. He unlocks one arm, and gives the key to Eddie, telling him he should be ashamed of himself. Eddie says all Lushion’s dreams are coming true. They tricked him. Lushion doesn’t want to know, and asks if Eddie wants to press charges. Eddie says he’ll handle it himself.

Lushion tells Larry and Randal that it seems Eddie doesn’t want to press charges. They laugh, saying they already knew that. Larry says he’s heard about Eddie, and isn’t Lushion glad he got his comeuppance? Eddie comes downstairs, and Larry calls him the belle of the ball. I laugh because he’s still wearing a leather collar. He grabs the gun out of Lushion’s waistband, and starts shooting.

Next time, Lushion tells Kelly not to say a word until the lawyer comes, Lushion asks Ian what he knows about Larry, and Esperanza and Stephen get together again.

  Tabatha Coffey is back on Bravo with Relative Success with Tabatha, beginning next Wednesday, January 17th, at 10 pm. I’ve enjoyed her other efforts. She reminds me of a female Gordon Ramsay. She wears a lot of hats, one of them being therapist to whoever is getting the makeover. She’s the stoic with a heart of gold, and will be advising on family problems this time around.

👠 I got an email where the subject line said, Those shoes you want are on sale. I was like, cool! and opened it. Not even close. As a matter-of-fact, they were the kind of shoes I hate.

Tabatha

January 9, 2018 – The Painting Follows Franco, HAHN Returns, Dorit Tops Her Own Idiocy & Giggy!

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

At Charlie’s, Alexis tells Julian the landlord is sketchy at best. Julian says he’s across the street, and can be there in thirty seconds if he sees anything is wrong. Alexis tells him not to think he’s going to get anything in return.

Laura is visiting Elizabeth, and Elizabeth asks if she’s happy. Laura says she thought she’d never love again, but it can surprise you. Elizabeth says yes, it can.

A guy delivers the painting of the brothers to Franco’s office. Franco says it was supposed to go to his studio, but the guy tells him to call the company if he has a problem. Franco asks the painting why it won’t leave him alone.

Olivia-Q tells Ned that she’s his wife, and he’s supposed to love, honor, and listen to what she says. He would be a perfect candidate. He says he’s not running for mayor.

Michael says that Carly is cleaning and organizing. From his experience, that means something is bothering her. He asks if she wants to talk about it, and she asks how much time he has.

Sam thanks Jason for coming. He asks if something is wrong. She says it’s not life or death, but a problem needs to be addressed. She needs a divorce.

Alexis asks Molly what’s going on? She says Curtis hasn’t been able to prove sabotage with the boiler. Alexis says something will come up, and Molly says they intend to expose the landlord for the greedy rat that he is.

Franco tells the painting it’s only a gruesome reminder that when he was three, he pushed a kid down the stairs. It was long before the tumor. He wonders how Elizabeth would be able to love him if he told her. He’s sure she would touch him, and say he was just a kid, and she still loves him, but what if she freaks out and goes back to Jason? He would die. He loves her too much to risk losing her. He can’t risk losing the best thing in his life, even if he doesn’t deserve it. He’s sorry for what he did to Drew.

Jim Harvey calls Ned, and says he has an arena with his name on it. He’s wondering when they’re moving to the next step. Ned says they would if he was still with ELQ, but he left, thinking it best for everyone concerned. As far as the redevelopment, he’ll be dealing with Michael moving forward. Jim says Michael has been less than receptive, and Ned tells him good luck. Olivia joins Ned, and tells him she also believes it’s best for everyone. He asks her if she’s including the city of Port Charles. He’s a businessman, not a politician. She tells him that they’re not mutually exclusive, and his experience gives him a leg up. He says she’s not giving up, is she? and she asks if he’s met her.

Carly wonders why Michael has no reaction to Nelle working at the gallery. He says he’d prefer she sought employment somewhere else, but it’s none of his business. Carly reminds him that Ava caused Morgan’s death, and he knows what Nelle is capable of on her own. Who knows what will happen with Ava’s influence. He says it’s not his call. They told her get job, and she did. Carly thinks it’s just a strategy to get him back. Michael says that might be, but his eyes are open, and he sees her for what she is. He knows she’s playing a game. What she doesn’t know is, so is he.

Sam explains to Jason that she and Drew were originally married under the wrong name. When they went to get the marriage license, there was a problem with the paperwork – she and Jason are still technically married. She needs a divorce. It only changes things on paper, but it’s important to her. Jason tells her it’s okay. He gets it. Just send the paperwork to Diane, and he’ll sign it. Sam doesn’t want to complicate things, but he says he won’t fight her on anything. She knows that, but they need a reason, even if it’s not contested. She shows him a list of reasons for divorce, but he says none of those are them. She wonders what is?

Jim goes to Charlie’s, looking for the manager. Julian introduces himself, and asks what he can do for Jim. Jim was hoping he could do something for Julian.

Molly tells Alexis they’re going to have a rent strike. They’re going to hang banners from every window, and everyone will know the injustice being done. Maybe the local news will get involved, and they can out the creep for the rat that he is. Alexis says no.

Jim tells Julian he’s offering him more than enough to relocate. Julian says Charlie’s is staying put.

Molly asks Alexis what about defending people’s rights? She watched her mother do that her entire life. Now she’s telling Molly that she shouldn’t?

Laura tells Elizabeth that she would have laughed if someone told her she’d be married to Doc. The truth is, she was scared. Maybe Elizabeth can relate to love not working out. Elizabeth jokes that she has no idea what Laura is talking about. Laura says she was gun-shy, and Elizabeth asks why she took the risk. Laura tells her because of how Doc looks at her and makes her feel. It was the smartest move she ever made.

Doc visits Franco’s office. He says the painting is fascinating. It’s beautiful; the depth and the mirror image of the boys. He also had twin. Saying his twin was a tortured soul is an understatement, and he died some time ago. Franco says he’s sorry, but Doc says he made peace with it. He feels peace when he looks at the painting. The boys are companions, trying to get to an idyllic world that represents safety. If they could break through, they’d have everything they want. That’s how he sees it. Franco says that’s one way to look at it. He tells Doc it’s on its way to storage. When he looks at it, it evokes a different set of emotions. Doc says for what it’s worth, he’d think twice about putting the painting or his emotions in storage. It’s amazing what you can do when you face them head on.

Michael says he hears Carly, but it’s already in motion. He has no legal recourse, and can’t tell Nelle who to work for or who to associate with. The more he pushes, the more she’ll do the opposite, He has to make her think she’s winning him over. Carly says as long as she doesn’t. It scares her. It’s not like him. She’s the one who plays people, and he didn’t inherit that. He asks if she’s calling him a pushover. She says he has the ability to see the good in people, and gives them the benefit of the doubt, which makes him more vulnerable. Michael says he was that baby in an endless tug of war. You don’t go through that and not learn something. He tells Carly that he only cares about his child.

Sam tells Jason sorry about New Year’s Eve; it shouldn’t have happened. She says the divorce isn’t because of that, and she feels badly that things are screwed up for him. he says it’s not her fault. She says it’s not his either. Neither of them could have known what was ahead when they got married. He asks if she would have changed it, and she says no. He says neither would he. Sam tells him that she said the vows because she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. Jason says he wanted to make her happy, and still does. If divorcing her makes her happy, then he will.

Alexis tells Molly for the sake of sanity, don’t escalate things. At least not until Curtis finds out what they need to know about this guy. Alexis leaves, and Julian tells Molly that her mom is right. She says nobody asked him.

Laura tells Elizabeth that Doc is probably out printing up buttons and posters for her campaign. Elizabeth thinks he might be on to something, but Laura says one successful speech doesn’t a mayor make. Elizabeth tells her not to sell herself short, and Laura says she’s a risk taker now. She thinks sometimes the way to find happiness is to let go of what feels safe and comfortable, and go for it. She leaves, and Elizabeth closes the door, saying, just go for it, to herself.

Carly thinks it’s kind of ironic how she acted when she was pregnant with Michael, and wonders if what goes around comes around, Michael tells her that he’s not saying she behaved well, but he believes the decisions she made were in his best interests, because she loved him. She says she still does, and it scares her. She doesn’t think Nelle is wired that way. He says he’ll be careful, but Carly says she still worries about him. He tells her that he has to talk to Ned.

Michael goes over to Ned’s table. Olivia says she has to get back to work, but the conversation isn’t over. Ned says it never is. Michael tells Ned that he believes the company’s strength comes from it being a family operation. His offer is genuine, and if Ned feels like Michael treated him with anything other than respect, he sincerely apologizes. Ned accepts, and Michael asks if he’ll reconsider his resignation.

Franco brings the painting home. Elizabeth kisses him, and he says he’s going to go out and come in again; he likes the way it’s going. She says she wants to set a wedding date right now can’t wait to marry him. They kiss some more.

Sam says it seems strange to thank Jason. He says they didn’t break their promises, they just didn’t keep them in the way they expected. Sam says he made her happy back then, and made her whole or got her to a place where she could become whole. She can’t repay him for that, but he tells her to just live, and find joy in being a wife and mother. Sam says she does, and Jason says he can tell. He’s glad she’s getting to live the life they both know he couldn’t give her. He starts to leave, and says, irreconcilable differences. They should use that, because he loves her, and she loves Drew.

Laura sees Jim’s card near the register at Charlie’s. Julian says if she’s looking for him, he’s right there. She introduces herself, and he says she would like to talk to him about the redevelopment project. He says he heard about her speech, and was hoping their paths would cross. He says his plans were misunderstood; he has only good plans for Port Charles, and hopes she would share his vision. She says she has a particular interest in the area, especially the children and families living there. She asks how his vision is going to benefit them.

Olivia asks if Carly is okay. Carly says that Nelle played their family from the second she landed, and now she’s going to be part of their family. Mothers have all the rights and all the say, and it drives her crazy, thinking Nelle is calling all the shots after what she did to the family. Olivia says if Carly needs her help, to let her know.

Ned says at least Michael has the guts to admit when he’s wrong. Ned is happy Michael has come around to his way of thinking. Michael says in terms of the Charles Street project, at this point, it’s still off the table. Ned asks why invite him back then, and Michael says he wants Ned to run the South American division. It needs ramping up, and they need someone of his caliber to oversee it. Ned says it’s unbelievable. You don’t send someone of his caliber and experience to the boondocks. He wonders if Michael is afraid that it’s painfully obvious Ned should be running ELQ instead of him.

Franco asks if Elizabeth is sure. She says she’s done with being comfortable and easy. People like them stay safe after they’ve had trouble in relationships, but it’s time to rock the boat. Franco says he’ll rock whatever she wants him to, and she says that’s even better.

Jason sees Carly at the MetroCourt. She says she’s so freaked out. Michael says everything is under control, but he doesn’t know what he’s doing. Jason is the only person he’ll listen to, and she’s afraid to push him. She asks where Jason was, and gets all excited, realizing he was with Sam. She asks what happened, and he says there’s nothing to tell. Sam asked for a divorce.

Alexis asks Sam what’s so urgent? Sam needs help with divorcing Jason. They’re 2011 marriage is still valid, and technically, they’re still married. She blurts out that they kissed the other night. It was like being transported back in time. She doesn’t want to be that person; that person doesn’t exist anymore. They both have to let go. Alexis asks if she’s letting go for the right reasons.

Julian tells Molly that her mother is worried about her. Molly says she clearly asked Julian to keep an eye on her, but she doesn’t want him anywhere near her. If she has a problem, she’ll call Sonny, Jason, Drew, the garbage man, or anyone who’s not him.

Jim tells Laura that growth comes at a cost. She says it doesn’t have to, and offers to show him around personally. He tells her he’s committed to the plan as written, and hopes she’ll come around. It’s a struggling neighborhood that finally has the chance to reach its full potential. She tells him not to hold his breath. He tells her it was nice meeting her, and leaves. Doc comes in, and asks what he missed.

Michael asks if Ned thinks he’d compromise the company to avoid agreeing with him. Olivia returns, asking if everything is okay. Ned says Michael just reinforced his decision to leave ELQ. Michael is sorry he feels that way. He wishes Ned the best, and tells him the door is always open. Olivia tells Ned to take deep breaths. Ned says behind those puppy dog eyes, is an ice-cold shark. Michael is making a mistake not listening to him, but Olivia says maybe it’s for the best that they carve out their own paths. Ned asks if she thinks his should be to the mayor’s mansion, and she says he’s smart, has a head for business, and has lived in this town forever. It’s true that in getting things done, it’s who you know, and he knows everyone. Ned asks if she really thinks he can do this, and she says she knows he can.

Franco chugs milk from the carton. He tells Elizabeth that he forgot to pick up more, and has to go. When he comes back, they’ll do something, like plan a wedding. Elizabeth suggests they practice for the honeymoon, and he tells her that practice make perfect.

Carly wonders if Jason and Sam are rushing things to avoid dealing with their feelings. Jason says they’re not rushing. He loves her, and she wants the safe and stable life she can have with Drew. Carly says, but she won’t have him, the one thing Drew can’t offer her, and it’s the one thing Sam wants, even if she won’t admit it.

Alexis is concerned that Sam is having emotional upheaval and is confused. Emotions are running high, and if she’s marrying Drew because of Jason, Drew will pick up on it not. She’s not saying to go back to Jason, but to not do anything right now. Jason is an inseparable part of her life. She needs to make peace with that before she thinks of marrying Drew.

Jim rings Elizabeth’s bell, and asks to talk to Franco. Elizabeth says he’s not home, so Jim leaves his card. He asks if Franco used to go by the name of Bobby Frank; he thinks he knew him as a kid. He remarks that Elizabeth’s home was part of ELQ’s renovation project. He says he hopes to do the same for Charles Street. Franco arrives, and Jim says, man, have you grown. Well, let’s hope so.

Laura thinks the renovation will be a disaster for Charles Street. The worst part is the spineless local government, and she doesn’t see anyone stopping them. Doc says he does. Sitting across from him.

Ned can’t believe he’s considering running for mayor. Olivia says he’s lived his whole life there. Ned says she would make the perfect politician’s wife. She says before they know it, she’ll be feeding the whole town cannoli. What does he say?

Doc tells Laura that this is her chance. Laura says he’s right. Both Ned and Laura say they’re running for mayor at the same time.

Sam tells Alexis that Jason was her first love, and she’ll always love him. Whether she marries Drew now, or ten years from now, that love will always be there, but they don’t act on it. Alexis promises that one day, Sam will wake up and not think about it, and that it will get better.

Carly tells Jason that she wants it for him, but knows he’ll be fine no matter what. She’s worried about Sam, and Drew wouldn’t want a wife who was in love with someone else. Carly had the best life with Jax, but she wanted to be with Sonny, and their marriage couldn’t take it. Jason isn’t nearly as toxic as he thinks he is. They can still have a future. Jason says, not if Sam doesn’t want to.

Sam tells Alexis that she’s actively choosing to marry Drew because she loves him, and loves their life together. She loves everything about him, and wants everyone to know it. Alexis says okay. She’ll help her with the divorce.

Tomorrow, Olivia wants to start campaigning, Charlotte asks Nina why she’s mad at Cassandra, and Jordan questions Valentin.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Justin calls for Harrington at the jail, acting like he doesn’t know Jeffrey. He tells him to step out of the cell and put his hands behind his back, and cuffs him. He takes Jeffrey to the interrogation room, and moves in for a kiss. Jeffrey says there are cameras, but Justin says he doesn’t care – since he made sure they’re not working. He asks how Jeffrey is, and Jeffrey wonders what kind of question is that? He asks what happened with Justin’s wife, but he hasn’t been home. It will be there when he gets there. Jeffrey says Justin needs to talk to her. Justin says Jeffrey is his man, and he did all of this to have him. Jeffrey needs him; he’s all Jeffrey’s got right now. Jeffrey tells him to back up; he’s not doing this. Justin says everything will be fine; he’ll make sure of it. Jeffrey says he’s sorry for what Veronica did, and Justin says he’ll handle it. Jeffrey asks what that means, but Justin is evasive. He says they have that bitch. She got him in it; they just have to get him out. Jeffrey asks if he killed her, but Justin says not here, and don’t say a word to anyone. He kisses the back of Jeffrey’s neck as he cuffs him again.

Kathryn, Hanna, and Benny come back from the funeral to Hanna’s new home. Hanna tells Benny to stop worrying about her, but he says that will never happen. He goes upstairs, and Kathryn says she’s sorry, but Hanna says there’s nothing they can do about it. Kathryn says pray for waves; waves of grief. Hanna told her that, and it helped. Hanna hopes it will help her, and Kathryn says just keep on praying. Kathryn asks how she’s getting settled in, and Hanna says it’s still new. Kathryn tells her to relax; she’ll get used to it. Hanna says she’s never lived anywhere she hasn’t paid. Kathryn suggests she come back to work for her. Her maid isn’t getting the hang of it at the new house. Their families have been through too much, but they can move on. She needs Hanna, and isn’t going to stop asking.

There’s a knock at the door. Benny answers. Hanna wishes she’d been there earlier. Quincy Jr. would have been safe. Mitch comes in to check on Hanna. He tells her if she needs anything, let him know, but she says she’s good. Kathryn’s phone rings. It’s Broderick at the hotel. She asks what her husband is doing there, and saysof course his credit was declined. She tells Broderick she’ll come there, and he can come to the desk and grovel. She tells Hanna that she canceled all of Jim’s cards. Hanna says she’s serious about the divorce. She asks who Broderick is, and Kathryn says the hotel manager. She’s not letting Jim stay, and is going to enjoy this. Hanna says she might stop by the new house and help the maid get settled in, just long enough to help her figure things out.

In the kitchen, Mitch asks, whose house? Benny tells her Kathryn gave it to his mom. Mitch says she seems like a nice lady, but Benny reminds him that she covered it up when her son hit him. He shows Mitch a truck for sale on his phone, saying they have to get back on their feet. He was thinking maybe Mitch’s family could give him a loan. Mitch says that’s a bad thing. Benny says he’s tried everything, but Mitch says the interest will be crazy. He says they were raking in the money before Candace did what she did. Benny says Mitch has to help. Mitch says Benny is his boy, and he’ll try to hook it up. Benny says he has no other choices. Mitch says okay, but know if something happens, there’s nothing he can do. Benny says he can handle it. They can be a team and keep it tight. No hurdle can knock them off the dream. Benny asks, hypothetically, if he messes up, will it come back to his family> Mitch says his family won’t be in it, but he will, and his knees, and arms. He’ll be buried in the reeds. Is he sure? Benny says let’s do it. Mitch says he’ll call his uncle. Benny asks to stop at the hotel on the way. He has to talk to Candace.

In her hotel room, a businessman type dude tells Candace she’s beautiful. She tells him to take his clothes off. He asks how much it will cost, and she says give her his wallet. She takes out the cash, and asks if that’s it. He says it’s $1800. She says it’s not enough, and tells him to get out. He says he’s not leaving until he gets what he paid for, and asks if she knows who he is. She says, actually, she does, and to get out. He asks what she’s saying, and she says he’s been robbed. She took his money, and she’s not having sex with him. She sees the tan on his ring finger. Obviously, he’s a corporate guy who worked hard to get where he’s at. Does he want to lose it all? He calls her a whore, and she says that’s right. She tells him that she saved him; go meet his wife. He calls her a bitch, and leaves, saying he’ll see her again. Geez, if it was that easy, we’d all be doing it.

Benny comes in, saying he came to check on her. Candace says he should call first. He asks if she’s turning tricks, and she says, see what happens if you don’t call? He tells her that she’s smarter and more capable than this. He’s her brother, and he’s not going to sit by and let her do this. Quincy Jr. dying was hard on all of them. She says he was murdered, and wasn’t his child. He says it hit them all hard; their mother is sick. Candace says she doesn’t care. Benny says she does. He knows she’s hurting and mad at the world. She tells him to go, and he says he has to talk to her. She says she has another john coming, but he says he’s going nowhere right now. If she’s not sleeping with them, how is she getting the money? Candace says she’s robbing them, and Benny says, like that makes it better. He tells her that their mother has a nice house with four bedrooms. They should be together; they’re a family. She says she’s never going to be around Hanna again; she let them kill her son. She’s going to get even with every SOB who ever did anything to her – Hanna, Jim, David, all of them. Benny says she started it, and Candace says she’s going to finish it. He should go before she calls security. He tells her when she’s past the anger, her family will be waiting. Candace says her family was cremated, but he says they’re her family too. He’s going back into business; she doesn’t have to do this. He says she should go back to school, get a legit job, and they’ll be good. She tells him to keep dreaming, and pushes him toward the door.

Jim tells Broderick to try the card again. It’s declined, and he’s like, wth? He asks if Broderick knows who he is, and says his family owns the hotel, with him and his wife owning 70%. Kathryn suddenly appears, and says, wrong.  Jim tells her his credit card was declined, and she wonders how that can be. Jim says this isn’t any fun, but Kathryn thinks it is. He demands she reactivate the cards, but she tells him the lawyer said they should keep their money separate until the divorce. He asks what he’s supposed to do, and she says he’s resourceful. This reversal of fortune might do him some good. Like one of the two-dollar whores he’s had, it’s time for him to pay for what he did. He tells her that he’s not taking this lying down. He’s reached his limit. She tells him to find somewhere else to live; take the easy way out, and sign the papers. He says they’ll no longer have spousal privilege, where they can’t be forced to testify against one another. She doesn’t give a damn, and tells him to sign the papers. She’ll give him $250K, and if he won’t take it, she’ll squeeze him until he does. Jim says she’s going to bring out the old Jim, and he’ll take her ass to the woodshed (whatever this means). Kathryn says she looks forward to it. She wants Wyatt’s address, but Jim won’t give it to her. She tells him that she’s getting security to escort him out.

Oscar watches as someone uses the ATM (maybe Quita, but it’s hard to tell). Oscar says, you’re not Wyatt. The police come and take the thief away.

Wyatt and Anna go back to his place. Anna insists something triggered him and he wants to use. He says it was nothing, but she won’t let up. Wyatt says he saw him, a priest who molested him. Anna says he’s safe now. Wyatt starts to cry, and says that’s why he uses. Anna says if he uses, he gives him the power, and they’re not doing that. He says he thought they were all dead, and she repeats they’re not giving them the power. She’s crying too, and he’s surprised she’s so emotional. She’s sorry he had to go through that. He asks if she wants to use, and she says they’re not using; they’re dealing with it. He asks if it happened to her too. She says her aunt. She’s strong in every situation but this. He hugs her, and moves in for a kiss, but she says they can’t; it’s not right. Wyatt kisses her anyway, and Anna kisses back. They get busy.

David tells Erica come on in; they’re at his house. He thought he and Veronica would be together there, but never showed it to her. He had it on the market, but is thinking of holding on to it. He says it’s too much house for a single man, and Erica says he won’t be single forever. He asks if that’s a proposal, but she says it’s a keen observation. He tells her it’s secluded, and no one could find her there. He wouldn’t mind living there if she was with him. Erica says they just met, but David says he knows her well enough. He’d enjoy being with her. She says she only has the clothes on her back, and he gives her a credit card, telling her to buy a wardrobe. He wants to know the name of her ex, but she doesn’t want him involved with all of her stuff. They move on to the kitchen. Wow. She hit the jackpot with this one.

Jim knocks, then walks in. David comes out, and he says he needs to borrow a credit card. He needs David to reserve a room in his name at the hotel too. Kathryn kicked him out. He was trying to give her enough space to get her mind back, but she’s close to pissing him off. Maybe he can get her back in line. He tells David, nice house, and wants to see it, but David says he has company. Jim wants to meet her – because he has nothing better to do – and David says another time. Jim asks if David has spoken to Mama Rose; she’s not returning his calls. David thinks the best way to get through is with Hanna’s son, Benny. He’s tight with her grandson Mitch. They’re the reason this mess started in the first place. Jim says he’ll talk to Hanna. He can’t believe Kathryn gave her maid a condo, and kicked him out of the hotel. David gives him some cash, and sends him on his way. Jim calls David a rascal.

Veronica’s car lies overturned and smoking. Wow. Six months later, and no one has called 911. It’s not far from the road either. Melissa crawls out of the window. Hanging upside down, Veronica asks for help, and Melissa says she’s the devil; keep calling her name. Melissa laughs. Veronica says she smells gas, and starts screaming. Melissa says, die, bitch.

Welcome back, Tyler Perry.

Next time, Melissa tells Veronica she’s going to sit there and wait for her to die, Jim threatens Broderick, Oscar tells Candace that Charles is still asking about her, and Justin tells Jeffrey he did everything for nothing.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

LisaR is flying to Tokyo to join her daughters doing their modeling thing. Erika is joining them as the teenage model wrangler. And of course, the glam squad will be there.

LisaR meets her daughters at the airport. There are some fans, and it blows her mind that they were working at the deli just over a year ago. She wonders what Kris Jenner would do, but it’s really not even close to that level yet.

LVP is having Kyle, Teddi, and Dorit over for lunch. Teddi says hello to the swans on her way to the door at Villa Rosa. LVP shows her around. In her interview, Teddi says it’s like a zoo castle, and wonders if unicorns are around the next corner. She meets the ponies. Next on the tour is LVP’s the closet. Teddi says her husband has the bigger closet, and LVP says that would be grounds for divorce. Dorit and Kyle arrive.

Kyle talks about how beautiful the vacation was. She raves about Croatia, and I want to cry. She says she had the genius idea of having the floors ripped up while they were away, thinking they’d be done when they got back. That didn’t happen. She says she’s going to have a party when they’re finished. Lunch is served. LVP says they’re supportive friends. They joke around, and Kyle says LVP is on the table now instead of being sneaky. LVP says Kyle holds her to a higher standard. Teddi wonders if LisaR knows a lot of the conversations revolve around her. In her interview, Teddi says there are two side to Dorit – the fun girl and the trash talker. She says one of them will turn on her soon enough. Everyone is laughing, but it’s probably true.

Teddi likes to keep active with the kids, and do real life activities. She says she lets the kids have a tablet when they go on a trip, and when they come back it’s like getting them off crack. She and Edwin take the kids on a jog on a mountain trail, with Edwin pushing a double-stroller. She wants them to have the childhood she didn’t since her parents divorced when she was nine, and wants them to have a joking banter about their parents’ love.

Giggy! LVP tells Hanky he’s a naughty boy. Bill and Susan from Beverly Hills Life magazine come over. LVP is editor and chief now, and thinks making decisions suits her perfectly. She shows them some jewelry samples she created with the fashion editor, and informs us that being without glamorous jewelry in Beverly Hills is a cardinal sin. She’s thinking of asking Dorit to model the jewelry. Susan says Dorit embodies the lifestyle, and thinks she must have modeling experience, since her social media is impeccable.

Erika tells us that she needs levels of clothing for Tokyo. It’s all about fun, and there are no fashion rules. LisaR says it’s crazy there. She goes to a store opening or something, where the girls are being featured. She says their careers have skyrocketed, unlike her own, which took forever. Erika gets all excited to hear the girls are doing Vogue Taiwan. LisaR says they’re categorized as millennials who are the children of famous people. The Kardashians opened the door, then the Hadids. They might get in the door quickly, but have to work hard, since the window will close in a hot second.

Dorit is getting her makeup done. She says it was ultra-last minute, but LVP says she doesn’t need a lot with her natural beauty. In her interview, Dorit wonders why LVP didn’t give her more of a heads up. She’s honored, but wants to look her best. She says it’s different from what she was told, but in spite of feeling uncomfortable, who could say no to LVP? She looks at the photos, but doesn’t like anything. She thinks she’s too shiny, but everyone else seems to love the pictures.

In Tokyo, Erika and LisaR wander around. LisaR loves that her daughters are killing it, but is bummed about them growing up. They’re not her babies anymore, and she’s glad Erika is there. She tells Erika about the horse show, and how she realized she’s done with the Dorit feud. Dorit doesn’t think she did anything wrong, but LisaR owned her part. Erika asks if she’s prepared to put it behind her for the sake of peace. Erika thinks LisaR has changed because her daughters are growing quickly, and she needs to set an example.

Kyle says it’s not the most opportune time to entertain. The floors still aren’t finished, and her OCD is in overdrive. She’s just going to keep the tequila flowing.

Erika dons a pink wig, and heads out with LisaR. They go to what LisaR calls a geisha house, but I think she means tea house. She proclaims it an authentic Japanese experience. They have to take off their shoes, and LisaR has to help Erika with her Gucci thigh-high boots. I’ve decided I don’t like watching LisaR eat. Both of them have some difficulty eating the local cuisine – things like whole baby fish – although they’re polite about it. LisaR wonders where her California roll is. Back in California. Erika talks about her son, who’s a police officer. She says you want them to be independent, but it freaks you out. LisaR says she’s been fortunate with no sexual harassment, but she knows what’s out there. She wants her girls to be able to trust their gut. A lady comes in with a stringed instrument and sings, while another woman dances. It’s kind of like the Japanese hula – a lot of hand gesturing.

The lights go out at Kyle’s place. Assistant Glen says everything is fine. Kyle says she’s always been worried about the power going out when she throws a party, and now it’s happening. Glen insists they’re not canceling. He says they’ll candle things up. Dorit and PK arrive first. Dorit says it’s one hundred degrees, and drinking is about the only thing that will get them through. The guests trickle in, while dog Storm makes a play for the buffet. Dorit wonders if there are any fans. I’m realizing that Dorit is a complainer. I hate that.

LVP comes bearing a hostess gift candle, which is more appropriate than she realized. Camille’s boyfriend David is coming. She met him at a Halloween party, which is pretty cool. Mauricio comes home. He says the neighbors have power, and asks if Kyle has called DWP, which I assume is their power company.

LisaR’s daughters meet her and Erika for dinner. Erika tells them that she and LisaR ate out of their comfort zone. They talk about a YouTuber who eats on camera, and show a clip of a girl eating pizza. Erika doesn’t understand what’s interesting about watching people eat obsessively. I’m not sure, but I don’t understand what’s interesting about this one in particular. In her interview, LisaR says she tries not to make food weird. The subject of porn comes up, and Delilah (or maybe it’s Ameliah) says LisaR’s sex book taught her some techniques. I vaguely remember this book, and puzzle over why anyone would want to read it. LisaR says if you’re going to learn it, learn it right. She reads aloud in her interview, and wonders how she could put these things in a book. She says your job as a parent, is to give your children the tools to conquer the world, but she didn’t think she’d give them this.

Mauricio is working on the power situation. Kyle asks if he’s sure he paid the bill. Camille introduces David around. LVP says it’s been a tough journey, and she’s happy for her. In her interview, Kyle says there’s Dorit on her own, and Dorit with a couple of shots. It’s like she has an evil twin. At the table, Dorit does an imitation of LVP. In her interview, Kyle thinks LVP is a little jealous of her connection with Dorit. Dorit claims to be the only one not scared of LVP. Camille says they’ve all seen each other at their worst, but Dorit says she hasn’t seen Kyle that way. She brings up her discussion with PK about having another baby. Camille says she doesn’t have a uterus, so she’s out. Dorit goes off on a tangent about Camille, starting with saying she’s naming a sex toy line after her. In her interview, Teddi says sometimes Dorit can be a show pony, and she tunes her out. Dorit yells that Camille is a stupid the-word-all-women-hate. In her interview, Camille says that everyone is allowed to act stupid sometimes, but Dorit has abused the privilege. At this point, she doesn’t care about her, but she cares what David thinks. Dorit kind of apologizes, and Mauricio tells her to shut up.

Next time, Lisa does a morning TV show, a found dog makes its way to Vanderpup Pets, Kyle cries with Dorit, and LisaR gossips about LVP.

😍 LVP was on Watch What Happens Live tonight, and – Giggy!

GiggyWWHL

December 28, 2017 – New Year’s Eve in PC Begins, a Little Chef, a Little Real Estate, a Little News & a Lotta Laura

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

At Aurora, Peter proposes a toast. He complements everyone, and toasts to a great new year at the company. Nina hopes the champagne didn’t come out of Crimson’s budget, but he says it was a gift from their landlord.

Carly tells Michael she can be there if he needs back up with Nelle. He tells her to enjoy the night, and happy new year. Sonny isn’t surprised, and Carly wonders if it was Nelle’s plan all along to start the new year with Michael. Sonny is like, in the hospital? And she says, could happen. Jason comes b,y and tells them that he has a plane to catch.

At the hospital, Nelle asks if her dizziness is normal, and Michael says that’s what they’re here to find out. Kim is off for the day, and Monica is her replacement.

Anna is working two laptops, and tells Finn don’t touch that or that or that; one tweak in the wrong direction, and everything is useless. She thinks he should go for a walk. I might point out it’s like, zero degrees today where they’re supposed to live. Finn calls her a glory hog, and says she’s stuck with him whether she likes it or not.

Valentin comes home to Cassandra and her companion in his living room. Or whatever they call it at Windemere. She’s bringing him good tidings. He asks if she’s leaving town, and she says she is. And he’s coming with her.

Finn asks if the bug is working, and Anna says it’s great. He’d be happier if she’d admit he’s not a bumbling amateur, and she says he has his uses. He says she can’t do it, even though she blackmailed him into this mess. Anna says he’s the one who refused to stop. She says they’re at the end, and can now pinpoint the location. Finn says, thanks to his bug, but she says technically, it’s hers. He tells her that he installed it, and she calls him impossible. He asks how long this will take, but she’s not sure yet, and it makes Finn a little nervous. Anna says she thought he said he had Cassandra eating out of his hand, and he says Cassandra needs to keep hands to herself.

Cassandra wants Valentin to put in appearance, and familiarize himself with the product. He says he has nothing to do with quality control, and she tells him to consider it a gesture of solidarity. He says it’s her brainchild, but she insists it’s time for him to get his hands dirty, and eliminate Sonny.

Jason wants to go back to Russia. He thinks somebody at the clinic might know something about Faison. Sonny says he might get killed, Jason he insists that he has to go. He steps away to take a call. Carly says he can’t get on the plane; he needs to be here with Sam. Sonny says whatever she’s planning – no. She runs off to talk to the chef, but he notes she’s going in the wrong direction.

Peter asks if their fearless leaders care to share any plans for the new year. Drew tells him they’re off the clock; take it easy. Maxie reminds Peter that tomorrow is a holiday. Carly pops in, and they thank her for the champagne. She says anything for her favorite tenants, and invites them to the party downstairs. Drew and Sam have other plans, and Lulu tells everyone that they rented out the Haunted Star to watch the fireworks, because it’s totally her business. Well, the Haunted Star is her business, but not shouting out Drew and Sam’s plans. Drew says, first, he’s dropping by the hospital to wish Monica a happy new year. Carly tells Sam it looks like Aurora has stabilized, and Sam says she’s looking forward to a profitable year. Carly is glad it worked out. She sees Sam’s ring, and asks if it’s new. Sam says Drew gave it to her after they agreed to remarry. She thought it was great for a fresh start. Carly says everyone could use one, and congratulates her.

Finn tells Anna that Cassandra toweled him off like he was a grease fire. Anna says maybe it was more innocent than that, and he says, employee harassment. She says, the nerve, especially since he’s completely unavailable. Finn says he is as far as Cassandra is concerned, and Anna wonders if he gave the wrong impression, and led her on. Finn says he would never cheat in a fake relationship – or a real one – but he guesses they’ll never know.

Valentin asks if Cassandra wants him to assassinate Sonny, and she wants it dealt with before they leave. It’s time to refocus, and he was right. Sonny is a paragon of virtue when comes to drugs. Valentin says he doesn’t tolerate traffic in his town, and Cassandra asks what he thinks will happen when his town is the hub of opiate traffic. It’s self-preservation. He has to kill Sonny, before Sonny kills him.

Jason tells Sonny his flight was delayed, but he has to find Faison now. Sonny thinks it’s more like he wants to get away from Sam, but Jason thinks it’s a good idea to keep his distance; Drew isn’t handling it well, and it’s killing Sam. Sonny says at some point they have to stop this, and make it okay. They need to figure it out for themselves. Him leaving isn’t going to change Sam’s feelings, and either Drew moves forward, or it will consume him; it’s not on Jason. Jason says Sam made her choice, and he needs to honor it.

Maxie tells Sam that they’re going to feel like the only ones in the world on the boat. Sam says that’s the idea. Maxie asks if that’s what she’s wearing, and when Sam says it is, she asks how many times she has to ride to her rescue in dressing appropriately. Friends don’t let friends do drab. She asks Nina for permission to raid the Crimson closet.

Michael waits for Nelle, and Drew walks in. He tells Michael that he came to see Monica. Michael says it’s good to see they still have a relationship. Drew says he’s a lucky guy, and asks why Michael is there. Michael says he’s there for Nelle.

Nelle thanks Monica for seeing her. Monica says even if she wasn’t on duty, she would have made herself available. Nelle says the Quartermaines stick together, and Monica says, you’d better believe it. Nelle asks if that’s a threat, and Monica says, no. It’s a promise to her unborn baby. Monica asks about the dizzy spells, and Nelle says they’re usually the same; she gets lightheaded and has to lie down. Monica tells her that everything looks good, but wants to do a full workup to be sure. Nelle asks if she wants to make sure she’s not lying; it’s clearly what she’s thinking. Monica tells her not to get upset; it’s not good for the baby. Nelle says it’s frustrating to consistently judged, but Monica wouldn’t know what it’s like. Monica says she does.

Sonny tells Jason if he thinks it’s the right move, he’ll back him, but doesn’t want him to take off and disappear. Jason says he’s not giving up his life there. His kids know he exists, and he can’t cut out on them; he would never do that. Sonny asks if he’s spending time with them. Jason says he saw Jake on Christmas, but Jake wanted nothing to do with him. He says Jake has been thrown so many curveballs, and now he shows up out of nowhere. Sonny says it’s not his fault. Jake needs time to process. Jason thinks maybe it’s good for him to go away, and give Jake time. He got lucky with Danny. Sonny says eventually, Jake won’t be able to deny it any more than Sam will.

At the Haunted Star, Maxie gets impatient. Sam comes out in a bodycon red number, with a keyhole neckline. Maxie says, me likey. Me too, but come on. Sam is gorgeous, and does her makeup impeccably every day, yet doesn’t know how to dress?

Lulu asks if Peter is going to the party, but he has a few things to finish up. She thanks him for giving her an opportunity. He says she’s the one brought the story, and thanks her. She wants to follow up with something just as big, or bigger, and wonders if he has any ideas. He says one comes to mind. The question is, does she have the guts to tackle it?

Anna balks at the two of them in a real relationship. She says Finn would drive her crazy. He says ditto, with her tea and crumpets, and accent. She says he loves her accent, and he admits that he does.

Cassandra’s phone rings, but she ignores it, and asks Valentin why he’s so squeamish? Just take Sonny out.

Anna gets a signal from Cassandra’s phone. She thinks it’s the factory, and calls Robert. She asks if he’s getting it.

Cassandra answers the call, and tells Valentin that the lab agrees Finn’s formula will work. She says they’re to leave immediately, and get packing. Valentin says his daughter is sleeping, and his wife is expecting him. Cassandra threatens to call Nina herself. Valentin throws her phone across the room, saying there’s only so far she can push him. Great. Now what? Eric! Her companion’s name is Eric! Cassandra has Eric fetch the phone, and says she’s capable of compromise. They can leave in the morning. It’s what’s best for everyone; trust her. And you know when someone says that, it’s the last thing you should do.

Anna looks at a map along with Robert. She tells him she’s looking for a water source; it would be needed to produce drugs. They find one, and she tells him to look for a road. Finn watches as she works. They find an airstrip, and Anna says to send in the strike team. They’ve got her.

Nelle is surprised to find out that Monica didn’t know who AJ’s father was. Monica says they didn’t have DNA tests then. Nelle says she hasn’t been with anyone else, and it’s obviously Michael’s baby. Monica says she’s not implying her story is the same, but maybe Nelle can learn from her experience. Nelle asks how she handled it, and Monica says it wasn’t easy, but she learned to focus on what was important – her child. Nelle needs to focus on that. Being born a Quartermaine comes with host of things. Nelle says for the baby, but not for her. Monica tells her that she’s not the first woman to have a Quartermaine baby, and she won’t be the last, but if it makes her part of the family remains to be seen.

Drew asks Michael if he’s sure the baby is his. Michael says they’ll know once they have a test, but the timing is right. Drew congratulates him, and says it turns out he has child from a former life. They agree at least their lives are interesting.

Peter suggests Lulu write an article about Jason and Drew. He can’t think of a more interesting story. Lulu says everyone else is covering it. He adds, except them. He figured it was on purpose because of Sam and Drew. Lulu says the story might never see the light of day, but Peter thinks maybe with a friendlier approach, and they can control it themselves. He suggests instead of focusing on the victims, focus on the perpetrator – Caesar Faison. YES!!!

Jason tells Sonny that Sam deserves a safe life for her and the kids, and Drew can give it to her. Sonny says she also deserves to be happy. Jason says if that’s what she wanted, he’d thank God, but she picked Drew. Sonny says that Jason is the person she’s meant to be with.

Maxie tells Sam that Drew will combust when he sees her. Sam isn’t totally in, and tries on the next dress. It’s black, very low cut, and sleeveless with sparkly shoulders. Maxie says that’s good too. Both are good choices, so she should just go for fit, style, and comfort. Strike comfort; it has no place in fashion. She tells Sam that they both match the coat she’ll need if they’re going to be outside. Sam says she has a coat, but Maxie scoops up her motorcycle jacket, saying it’s not appropriate. She says her work here is done, and leaves.

Monica sees Drew, and they wish each other a happy new year. She wants to steal Michael for a minute, and says she’ll be back. She tells him that Nelle and the baby are fine. He asks if she has any idea what’s causing the dizzy spells, and she tells him, low blood pressure. She’s been pushing herself too hard, and needs to take better care of her health, but the baby fine. Michael thanks her. She says they’re family, and that overrides everything. Focus on the now.

Jason tells Carly that his flight was delayed. He asks where she went, and she tells him, Aurora. She was hoping Drew would admit they own the company because of him. Jason says it doesn’t matter, and he doesn’t want her handling his battles for him. She tells him that he and Sam belong together, and she needs to realize that. He tells her, Sonny just said that. She suddenly gets a text from Sonny, and tells Jason that Sonny wants to meet him at the Haunted Star; he might have information on Faison. What? How dare they be so far up in Jason’s business?

Lulu tells Peter that people have a morbid curiosity about Faison, and would probably eat up a profile on him. He tells her to think bigger – a profile and interview. She wonders if she’s supposed to track him down, and pray he doesn’t kill her. I dunno. He’s kind of an egoiste. He might actually go for it, especially if he thinks Anna would read it. She asks how she’s supposed to find him when the WSB couldn’t? Peter says she has a gift. She has two things, aside from raw talent. One is her husband. She says Dante isn’t going to tell her anything, but Peter says he’s sure she has ways of convincing him. She also has her father. The feud between Luke and Faison is legendary. He tells her to sleep on it. If something comes from it, career made.

Nathan is still waiting for Maxie at the party. Dante tells him they’re wasting valuable time. When the baby comes, they won’t have any time, and the time they have will be spent talking about kids. Nathan says he’ll trade that for the baby being okay. He still isn’t sure who his father is. Nina says, that’s why Maxie pulled a hair out of Valentin’s head.

Cassandra tells Valentin they’re expected on the tarmac at nine am. He says he’ll see her in 2018. Outside, she tells Eric what way to start the new year. She’s going to need a phone replacement before the morning. Eric hands her the card, saying it fell out. Oh, Valentin, what have you done?

Anna tells Finn the factory was just hit. They were taken by surprise, and there was minimal resistance. A mass quantity of drugs was found; it was a large-scale production. They’ve officially secured the factory, and taken it over. Finn asks what that means. Did they win? She says the battle, not the war. He says, but it’s over and no one got hurt. He grabs her and spins her around. Yep. I like these two together. Finn says Anna could benefit from loosening up once in a while, and she’s like, says man who organizes his flatware. She says they still have one more thing to take care of. He asks if it’s Cassandra, and she says, make that two.

Nina is wondering where Valentin is. Nathan suggests maybe he stopped for a crime spree or a kidnapping.

Anna calls Valentin, telling him that her investment paid off. He’s concerned about retaliation, but she says they have a team out after her. Valentin tells her where Cassandra is headed, and she thanks him. He tells her to thank him after she’s in custody. Anna tells Finn that it’s finished. He guesses so is their partnership.

Cassandra walks back into Valentin’s house, along with Eric, who has a gun pointed at him. He’s wondering what the what, and she tells him not to play innocent; it doesn’t suit him. She doesn’t want him killed there, and tells him to come quietly, for his family’s sake.

Nina texts Valentin, but there’s still no answer. Lulu and Peter arrive at the party. Lulu tells Dante she’s his for the rest of the night. Maxie joins them, saying she was late for a worthy cause.

Michael tells Nelle that Monica said to take it easy. She says she’ll try. She found a job, and starts the day after New Year’s. He asks if the hours are flexible, and she says she needs the money. He says they can revisit the financial support issue. She’s not supposed to have any extra stress. She blows him off, saying she has the feeling this job will solve all of her problems.

Sonny tells Carly the party is off to a good start. She tells him it was rude to leave his date, and he points out that she actually left first. He asks what she’s up to, and she says he’s off the clock. Sonny asks where Jason is, and Carly says somewhere he needs to be. Oh, I see. She just said the message was from Sonny. I didn’t think Sonny would get that involved.

Jason runs onto the boat. He sees Sam in the black dress. They soap opera gaze at each other.

Tomorrow, Finn would like to stay, Sonny tells Carly that her plan isn’t going to work, and Cassandra has the crap beat out of Valentin.

💣 I have to mention that I’m really enjoying Jessica Tuck playing he hell out of Cassandra. As over-the-top as the character is, she makes it believable with a very understated, controlled performance. I’ll bet she’s having a good time too. Cassandra is a world away from One Life to Live’s Megan. I don’t suppose it will happen, but it would be fun if she were in a scene with Dr. Bensch (James DePaiva, Max, OLTL).

🍲 Television is still in holiday limbo, but I’m catching up with Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles and Top Chef, both having new episodes this week. Tonight, the chefs cooked meals that were “pieces of themselves.” Most picked something reminiscent of their childhood, bringing to mind my father’s neckbone soup. While we probably ate things no kid would touch today – he often cooked “Depression food,” since that’s when he grew up – it was one of my favorites. I joke a lot about my avoidance of cooking, but can get ambitious occasionally, and did make it myself once when I lived alone. IMO, it was good, but not the same. Probably because the love was missing.

🌉 I knew long ago I could never be a chef, top or otherwise, but the jury is in on my being a broker too. My career would be over the first time I smacked a condescending client with a superiority complex, and way too much money, in the face. Tonight, one of Madison’s clients wanted to be on a certain road at a certain price for two months. It was the peak season, and she waited until the last minute. Like what I do when I’m getting my hair cut before the holidays begin. He did find her something slightly (slightly in terms of the wealthy, so I mean $100K) more than she wanted, but she compromised. I’d like to think her demanding attitude was to play for the camera, but holy! She was a witch of the highest order, and not very couth. Bringing up the price in front of the client is never good form. My interest was also piqued when James and David checked out what they deemed to be the future of real estate in LA, namely, luxury apartments. At first, when they used the term “vertical living,” I thought it must be some futuristic Japanese design. I was pretty surprised when everything looked like what it’s looked like in NYC for as long as I can remember, but it was cheaper.

🎭  Tyler Perry will joining us again soon, but this season, it’s The Haves and the Have Nots on Tuesdays, and If Loving You is Wrong on Wednesdays.

Good Advice

🎬  Steven Spielberg‘s advice to Laura Dern: From New York Magazine’s new profile of the actress: “’When I was 23,” says Dern, “right before a close-up on Jurassic Park, Spielberg said to me, ‘People will tell you what you could do to your face years from now. Don’t you ever touch your face.’ He was saying, ‘Your face is perfect, it’s female, it’s emotional.’ I am determined to be human in my acting, and when you own your power and your womanhood, you grow into your beauty. Your face finds you.” (Thank you.)

JurassicPark

JurassicPark2

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😉 And Because I Couldn’t Resist…

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Jurassic Pug

 

 

 

November 21, 2017 – Robin Makes the Rounds, Wrong Loving Finale, a Disco Party Drunk & a New Inn

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Franco gives the boys hats that are exact replicas of pilgrim hats. Elizabeth asks if there’s a bonnet for her, but he says the costume shop supports gender fluidity, and gives her a hat. Franco is thankful for them, and the welcome to their family. He vows to protect them and the beautiful life they share, no matter what.

Robin stops by Sonny’s. She tells Carly about seeing Jason, and Carly asks if there’s any doubt in her mind. She says none whatsoever. Carly tells her they made a terrible mistake.

Michael, Jason, and Sonny have a beer on the patio. Jason is thankful to be home.

Alexis stops by Sam and Andrew’s place. Sam tells her there’s a work emergency. There was a break in the programming for a broadcast. Andrew says it has something to do with Olivia-J.

Ava emails Dr. Zajack. She’s heard he’s had wonderful results with cutting-edge methods, and thinks he can help her. She asks to discuss it with him. Griff arrives. He asks what has her so intent.

Sonny thinks Klein’s boss cut his losses. Jason thinks he’s waiting for the right time to strike. Sonny says they have to find him.

Sam wonders why they’re promoting Olivia’s case, and Andrew says it’s newsworthy. She tells him to go on to dinner, and she’ll catch up. Alexis says the good news is he’s leaning into his role as a media mogul, and Sam tells her that he wants something lasting for their family; something no one can take away.

Robin asks what they were supposed to think when the DNA test came back a match? Carly says when she looked into Real Jason’s eyes, she knew. Robin tried to be logical, saying he could be the twin, but then she just knew it was him. Carly says they don’t have to miss him anymore. The guys come in.

Griff says Ava’s not returning his phone calls. Is she swamped or avoiding him? He says things were uncomfortable at the MetroCourt, and Ava says Carly couldn’t wait to blame her for Morgan’s death. It’s Carly venom; don’t pay attention. Griff says Carly doesn’t know him or what he wants, and he’s not going anywhere. He asks why no Thanksgiving with Kiki, and Ava says Kiki is working, so she followed her example. Griff is on call, but has no plans. Ava is surprised he’s not volunteering, and he tells her he just came from there. She says once a do-gooder always a do-gooder, and he says that now that the doing good is done, he can’t think of better person to spend this day with.

Griff brought Thanksgiving subs from Kelly’s, and mulled apple cider. Ava says he’s thoughtful, and he tells her that he has no intention of letting her be alone. She says she has plenty to keep her occupied with reconstructing her life. He says Carly was brutal, but if Ava hangs on to anything from her old life, refuse to be ruled by how others see her; focus on how she sees herself.

Elizabeth is thankful they have each other, and that Franco joined their family. Aiden is thankful for his grandma helping him with his homework, Cameron is thankful he met Aunt Hayden, and Jake is thankful that his mom and dad are getting along better. There’s a knock at the door. it’s Andrew. Jake hugs him.

Robin thanks Sonny for his help. She tells Carly that she contacted Sonny because she knew Jason would be with him. When Sonny said he wasn’t, she went to the footbridge. She tells Jason that she thought it was a dream and had to double-check. Jason asks if she can stay, but she tells him Anna is waiting; she’s doing her best to put on a big dinner. Sonny tells her to bring Noah over asap. They leave Robin and Jason to talk. Robin asks how he’s feeling, and he says he can’t complain. She guesses even though he’s found his way back home, he’s still far away from Sam and Danny. He says five years long time, and can’t blame her for moving on. Robin says she didn’t really; she thought she married him. Jason says Sam’s husband thinks he’s him, and he doesn’t want to put Sam in the middle. Robin says it’s easier for Sonny and Carly; they saw him and knew. Sam has a baby with her husband, and she can’t recognize him without breaking his heart, but that doesn’t change her love for him. If anyone gets it, she does.

Sam brings out pies she picked up for dinner. Alexis thanks her, saying Molly is so invested in impressing TJ, her fridge is full. She asks Sam if there’s been any word on Patient 6, but she says they haven’t heard anything since the confirmation of them being twins. Alexis asks what she thinks, and Sam says she loves her husband more than anything, but if turns out that Patient 6 is Jason, what does she do? What does it mean for them and their family if she believes it? She tells Alexis that she feels guilty, and Alexis says no one can blame him for fighting for his family. Sam says she doesn’t blame anyone, except whoever put it in motion. She says her husband wants to focus on Aurora, so that’s what she’s going to do. They sit down to watch the broadcast.

Nora is having a press conference. She explains that she’s the attorney on record for Olivia Jerome. She’s there to read a statement about the events that led up to the conviction of Olivia’s brother, Julian.

Ava gets a text from Kiki. It’s a link to a live feed of the broadcast, Nora reads Olivia’s words, saying how she experienced a break from reality. Her healing is slow and difficult, but she’s once again of sound mind. Now that she’s recovered, she couldn’t wait to clear her conscience. Julian was not acting of his own free will. He had no choice but to do her bidding, and should not be held responsible for any of her crimes.

Robin tells Jason that she watched Patrick struggle with same thing. Jerry Jax and Helena had kept her captive. She got away, and found her way back to Port Charles, but Patrick was about to marry another woman when she showed up. It was heartbreaking for everyone, especially Patrick. He’d moved on and fell in love. He couldn’t just pick up their life. He needed time and space to figure it out. Maybe Sam needs that too.

The boys go to watch football. Andrew says he’s going to Sam’s mom’s house for dinner. Jake asks if he’s talked to the guy pretending to be him, but he says he hasn’t found out anything. Franco goes to check on dinner. Andrew tells Elizabeth at least his son believes who he is, and her. Sonny and Carly believe the other guy, when he’s always been their friend. Elizabeth can’t imagine how he feels. He says they’re willing to trust his twin, when they don’t know where he came from or what he wants. Elizabeth tells him not to stress out over it; it will do more harm than good. He says that’s easier said than done. She tells him that it’s out of his control, but answers are on the way. He wishes he was as sure she is, and she says she has faith he’ll find answers he’s looking for.

Robin visits Elizabeth. She sees Andrew, and says, hi. He tells her it’s not much of greeting. She says she’s sorry, and he asks why she’s apologizing. She tells him that she thought he was Jason, but now that she’s seen his brother… Andrew finishes that she thinks he’s Jason.

Jason looks at Morgan’s photo. Michael comes in, and Jason asks what Morgan was like. Michael says reckless, charming, and funny. Morgan could make him mad, and then make him laugh so hard, he could barely stand. I’m telling you, he only became a laugh riot after death. I do not remember him being that way at all. Michael tells Jason there were a lot of ups and downs, and it wasn’t always nice when he got in trouble. Michael sometimes resented his job to clean things up, and wonders why he has to take care of everybody. For the first time ever, I identify with Michael. Jason says because they need him. He wishes he’d been there to help Morgan too.

Carly peeks in on Michael and Jason talking, and Sonny tells her not to hover. He told her that Michael would see the truth. She says a year ago, she didn’t think she’d be thankful for anything again, but  instead of being lost and in pain, she’s grateful for what she lost and got back. They go inside. Sonny sees the broadcast. Nora is saying that Julian was never a willing accomplice. Olivia forced him to cooperate.

Sam asks Alexis if Olivia is trying to exonerate Julian. Nora continues, saying Duke was murdered by one of Julian’s associates, and Olivia blamed Julian. She wanted him to suffer, and told him that his loved ones would pay the price if he didn’t help her. He had no choice but to commit any crime she told him to.

Elizabeth goes upstairs. Andrew asks how could Robin, of all people, not know the truth? He was with her at the clinic. It was her dream and research that saved him. When the clinic blew up, he carried her out and saved her life, but she says he’s not Jason. He tells her that Faison shot him, and he was pulled out of the river by Helena’s men, and kept on the island. She says while all that was happening, Helena messed with his mind, and convinced him that he’s Jason. He says that’s not possible. He remembers her, and their relationship. It’s not just memories; he feels it. None of that is real?

Michael tells Jason about Nelle being Josslyn’s kidney donor. She wasn’t a volunteer, but her father sold it without her permission. Jason says he sounds like a great guy. Michael says he was Carly’s stepfather. He lied, and Nelle wanted revenge. She lied and did bad things to his family. When she found out he truth, she was sorry, and he forgave her, but Carly, not so much. She kept on lying and keeping secrets though. He gets that she had a hard life, but she couldn’t stop. He told her they needed to take a break and give each other space. She kept pushing, but if she’d given him space, they might have made it work. Although I’m not too fond of Nelle at this point, I’m annoyed that Michael makes it sound like she chased him down. She kept offering to exit his life.

Nora continues to read Olivia’s statement, saying Julian has done things he should pay for, but she can’t in good conscience, allow him to pay for her crimes. Nora tells the press that the document has been forwarded to the proper authorities, and she’s not taking any questions.

Sam wonders what it means.

Griff asks what the point is. Ava says she wasn’t even thinking about what Olivia did to him. Her family is a nightmare, and he should run for the hills. He says he’s not going anywhere, and asks if she’s sure he can’t tempt her into spending Thanksgiving with him. His phone rings, and he’s needed in the ER. He asks for a raincheck. Ava says sure, but she’s going to be working on a project for the next couple of days. He calls it her big, secret project, and says he’s glad she’s diving in head first. Before long, she’ll feel like her old self again. She says she’s counting on it.

Carly asks who would give Julian a get out of jail free card. Sonny thinks someone is working on it, and she wonders if it’s Alexis.

Sam asks Alexis if this will exonerate Julian, but she says it might be enough for another trial. Sam says she doesn’t even view him as a father because of the horrible things he’s done to Alexis. Even if he’s not an accessory to Olivia’s crimes, he’s committed plenty of his own that he hasn’t paid for. She wonders why a statement came out of nowhere. Alexis tells her it’s Thanksgiving, and let’s just spend the day with family. Sam says they can talk tomorrow about how blindsided they both are. At least she is. She gets the feeling the news isn’t a complete shock to Alexis.

Andrew wonders how the life he remembers with Sonny and Carly and his wife wasn’t real. How is it possible that it was programmed into him? This, coming from the same guy who wondered how she programmed him not to remember.  Robin says what she knows for sure is that they’re biological twins, Susan is their mother, and Alan their father. He’s a Quartermaine, and Scout’s father. All the people who care about him, still do. That’s what matters. He says he needs them to believe him into him, and he’s looking at someone who cares that doesn’t. Robin says she has to go, and she’ll call Elizabeth later.

Franco comes out, and says it sounded rough. Andrew tells him not to start. Franco says he gets that “Jason” doesn’t like him. He feels the same way, but here they are. He’s trying to be a friend, and tells him what he needs to hear. He knows what it’s like for someone to tell who you are. They know, or think they know, about your past, and get to tell you who you are and what you want. He says screw anybody and everybody who tells him that he’s not Jason. He knows who he is, and what mattered. Don’t give up without a fight. Elizabeth listens from the hallway.

Dr. Zajack calls Ava. She says she’s heard amazing things about his work, and would like a consultation. I’m wondering if he’s Klein’s boss.

Sam thought Alexis would have had a bigger reaction. What if Julian is released? He held her at knifepoint. Alexis says she’s a Cassadine. She grew up in a world where violence and deception were the activities of the day. No matter what she does, it doesn’t change where she came from. Sam asks if she thinks deserves Julian, and Alexis says she thinks we’re drawn to the familiar and what we’re accustomed to. Both of their worlds were toxic, and they understand more than anyone else can. Nothing can change that. The ties they have are deeper than what logic can define. If Julian gets out, it will be better for him than where he is now, but she promises to move on to the next chapter. Sam hopes she means that. Alexis says she does, and leaves with the pies.

Franco tells “Jason” that he was once Jake Doe, but when his memories returned, he didn’t fall back in line as Sonny’s sidekick and Carly’s enabler. He built a life that works for him. Don’t let anyone take it away. Andrew says Franco’s is the only opinion he doesn’t give a damn about, because he’s turning into the biggest a-hole on the planet. He leaves, and Elizabeth tells Franco, nice try. He says he has his moments. She says, yes, just not with Jason. She asks why he reached out. Franco says it’s important to her and Jake, and they’re important to him. She says he always surprises her, and she loves him. He says despite circumstances and logic, she does, and just so she knows, he loves her too. They kiss.

Carly asks Michael where Jason is, and Michael says he thought Jason was with them.

Sam calls up to Danny to get a move on. She hopes Alexis isn’t visiting Julian by now. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Real Jason. They stare at each other.

Tomorrow, David does some Thanksgiving cooking, Andrew asks Monica if they’re still good, and Jason asks Sam what she wants him to do.

If Loving You is Wrong

Larry acts ignorant about saying Marcie was pregnant. He changes it, telling Randal that he was talking about Alex. Randal asks if Marcie is pregnant with that bastard’s baby. Larry says Randal is getting worked up over something he didn’t say. Randal says he doesn’t like Larry playing, and tells him get out. He doesn’t want to drive drunk, and Randal says he just did. Larry keeps insisting he didn’t say it. Randal says he ran into Marcie at the hospital, and kicks Larry out. Call Uber, Larry.

Marcie’s phone rings. It’s Randal, and she lets it go to voicemail. Her car won’t start, so she calls a tow place (Benny’s?) and they say it’s a two-hour wait. They have to send someone from Cincinnati. She says she’ll take a cab, but they need her to stay with the vehicle. Huh? If she’s taking a cab, why not wait until morning for the tow? She agrees, and I think, no good will come of this.

Brad’s phone rings while he’s sleeping. Alex answers. Marcie says, oh, all disappointed. Alex says she told Marcie not to call. Marcie says she needs Brad, and Alex repeats herself. Marcie tells Alex that she has car trouble, but she doesn’t care. She says call a cab. Marcie says if she does, she’ll come to the front door and take Brad out of bed; she’s not waiting two hours for a tow. Alex says her husband doesn’t belong to Marcie, and Marcie says it felt like it when he was in her bed. She promises she’s coming over there, but Alex hangs up. Marcie calls a cab.

Randal tells Larry to get off his porch. Larry says he’s waiting for his car. Randal pulls him up. He says he’s going to Marcie’s, and Larry grabs his keys. Randal jumps him, and they start fighting on the lawn. Alex hears something, and looks out the window. I’d laugh and go back to bed. Larry gets Randal in a choke hold. Randal says he’s not playing with him, and Larry asks if he’s calming down. He says he is, so Larry lets him go. Then – no surprise – he jumps Larry. Randal sees Alex, and says he knows what she wants to see, unzipping his pants. She closes the curtains, and Larry calls him a fool. Brad asks if he’s hearing shouting, and Alex tells him Randal is fighting with some guy. Brad hopes he gets his ass kicked.

Randal throws Larry up against his car, and tells him to go home. Larry says he’s not going anywhere. We see some whips and chains on the passenger seat, and Randal says Larry brought his toys. Larry says, wishful thinking, and he calls Larry a freak. Larry says Randal has tried it, but Randal says that was in college. He asks, as a friend, if Marcie is pregnant. Larry starts laughing. He forgot what a fool Randal is when he’s drinking. He heads toward Randal’s house, saying he’s going to sleep it off. Randal follows.

Natalie’s phone rings. It’s Kelly. She heard something in the backyard, and asks if Lushion is there. Natalie says he isn’t, but she’ll come over. She brings her gun. Kelly comes out, but Natalie tells her to stay on the porch, while she goes around to the back. The yard is empty, but Eddie pops up from behind the fence, asking what she’s doing with that toy gun. She tells him people are trying to sleep, and he tells her to get her ass back inside.

Natalie tells Kelly it was Eddie in Brad’s backyard. Kelly wonders why, but Natalie doesn’t know. She wants to give Kelly the gun, but Kelly doesn’t want to take it. Natalie says it’s hers and it has a nice balance. Kelly asks what if he comes to her house, and Natalie says she wishes he would. She’d cut him up in little pieces. Kelly goes back inside with the gun.

Now Brad hears something. He says that bastard, and goes downstairs; Alex following him. He sees Eddie sleeping in a lounge chair, and tells him to go home. He says he doesn’t have one, and Brad says he’s not sleeping there. Eddie tells Alex he has no place to go. By the time he got to the hotel, Brad’s credit card reached its limit. He says he’s not bothering anyone, and asks for a blanket. Brad goes inside. He tosses Eddie a blanket and pillow, and Eddie sarcastically says he’s a real friend, and he likes his eggs scrambled.

Alex asks Brad if he’s really sleeping there, and Brad says he’ll be gone in the morning. Brad says he’s her cousin, but Alex says she’s disowned him. There’s a knock at the door. Busy night in Maxine. They both go back downstairs. It’s Marcie. She says she called Brad, but Alex wouldn’t put him on the phone. She tells him sugar is in the tank of her car, and ruined the engine. She’s sure it’s Randal, and asks to borrow his car. Alex asks if she can’t rent one, but she says she’s not going into the city at this time of night. Brad says he doesn’t need his car for a couple of days. Marcie tells him she needs to get some boxes out of her car, and he offers to help. When he goes upstairs to get some shoes, Marcie tells Alex that he’s always going to rescue her. This isn’t going away any time soon. Alex says as soon as they walk out, she’s telling Marcie’s husband that she’s pregnant. Marcie says that will be around the time she’ll be screwing Alex’s husband. He loves her, and when she screwed him, she made sure he’d remember. Brad comes back, and Marcie tells Alex they’ll be a while, so she should go back to sleep – she looks tired.

Lushion knocks on Kelly’s door. She asks what happened, and he says they let Travis go; they couldn’t keep him. He says they’ll get him. She says he’s ruined her life, and they can’t even hold him. She tells Lushion to find something to hold him, but he says it will take time. She asks how much, but he has no answer. She asks if Travis has to kill her before something is done. He won’t let that happen, but she wonders how they can stop it. She has a son to think about. It’s too much, and she can’t keep doing this. She wants her life back. She wants her freedom back. Lushion says they’ll get him, and he’s right next door. He tells her to put the alarm on and lock the door. He leaves, and she sets the alarm.

Lushion goes home. Natalie says Kelly thought she heard something in the backyard. He asks if it was Travis, and tells Natalie that he’s out. She says it was Eddie. His dumb ass was in Alex’s backyard. Lushion says they did toss his place pretty good. She asks how Travis got out, and he says they couldn’t hold him. She tells him good thing she gave Kelly her gun. He’s not on board with that, but she says it calmed her down; it gives her some comfort. He’s getting it first thing in the morning, and asks if she hasn’t learned her lesson. Natalie says her gun is legit. He says it doesn’t matter, and Natalie tells him that she’s going to bed.

Larry goes out on Randal’s back porch to see the infamous shed. He says it’s a good spot, and explains how his BDS&M stuff can be set up. Eddie hears them. Larry and Randal have another drink. They laugh about Brad’s house being so close. Larry says he’s thinking of something else he’d like to do. Eddie pops up, and asks if he wants to do Randal. He asks who Larry is, calling him ma’am. Larry invites him over for a drink, but he says it looks like ladies’ night. Randal tells Larry that Eddie doesn’t have their history, and Eddie says no new history with him. Larry asks if he’s coming, and Eddie says he thinks he will. Randal asks what he’s doing, and Larry says what they did to Michael, and they do some weird secret handshake thing.

Eddie asks what the ladies are drinking. He tells them Alex is his cousin, and she’s the one Randal did in the shed, where he wants to tie up his chains, Larry says he wants to do Randal, but Randal’s not into it. He thinks Eddie might be though. Randal says Eddie took him to the woods and tried to kill him. Larry asks if this is the guy Randal came to see him about. He tells Eddie that he’s a lawyer. Eddie says he looked him up, and knows he has a wife and kids. He says Larry was a smart guy, dropping the charges. Larry says that was Randal. Eddie asks if his wife knows he’s there trying to get in the shed. Larry says he and his wife share everything, including Randal. He tells Eddie that she’s a dominatrix, and he has some stuff in the car. Eddie says as tempting as it is, he’ll pass. Larry says, let’s do this. Eddie asks for higher quality booze, and Larry goes inside to get something else.

Eddie asks if Randal is still trying to get Alex, but Randal says she’s old news. He has his eye on Esperanza; she’s his kind of ass. Eddie says she doesn’t like his kind, and Randal calls him a sorry, racist SOB. Suddenly, Larry comes up behind Eddie, and puts a plastic bag over his head. He struggles, and Randal helps subdue him. Well, I wasn’t expecting that.

Brad takes Marcie to her car, and moves the boxes to his car. He says the boxes are practically empty, so what’s going on? She says he offered, and she wanted to see him. He tells her she can’t do this. She wants to know why he can’t help her get over him. He asks if she flattened her own tire the other night, and she says she wouldn’t do that. She’s not crazy, which is debatable. He says she needs to call the police, but she says she has no proof. He tells her that she can’t keep calling him this late; he wants to make it work with Alex. She says Randal won’t let him. Brad admits Randal is trying everything, and Marcie says he’s relentless. She asks what she’s supposed to do when she misses Brad, and he says it will pass. She tells him she was at dinner with a really attractive guy, and she could only think of him. She’s having a hard time with this. He says he loves his wife, and Marcie is the one who begged him to save Randal. She asks if he’s saying she should go back to him, and Brad says she loves him and she knows it. Alex calls, and he says he’s on his way back. Pouting isn’t a good look for Marcie.

Travis jumps Kelly’s fence. He opens the electrical box and cuts the wires to the alarm. He tries to open the window, but it only opens an inch or two. She hears him, and silently approaches. He says, hi, and notices she’s not scared. She says, no. He asks to come in, and she tells him okay. She deactivates the alarm, so I have no idea what wires he cut. She opens the door, and steps away from it. He comes in, and closes the door, locking it. She asks what he wants, and he says her. She tells him to take his clothes off, but he suggests going in the bedroom. She says that’s too close to Justice, and tells him she missed him. He says he knew she wanted him back. All he had to do was wear her down. She says he has. He tells her to take her clothes off, but she says she wants to see him. She thinks about it all the time. Then she shoots him four times. Yes! He slumps down by the door, struggling to breathe.

This was the finale, so no preview.

❗I didn’t catch the dates, but next time, If Loving You is Wrong will be moving to Wednesday, while The Haves and the Have Nots will remain on Tuesday.

Below Deck

Captain Lee calls Kate to the bridge. He says he had a conversation with Matt about his less than stellar performance. Kate tells the captain they’re on the same page. Bruno doesn’t know why he’s been kicked out of the galley, and tells Matt that he needs to prove himself.

Kyle says he can tap into Jen’s craziness. Kate thinks a lot of people would have expected her to fire Jen by now, but hiring a new stew this late in the game would only be more work for her. In her interview, Jen says she’s there, working, and not giving Kate any reason to fire her, and she’s not quitting. Kate tells her to focus on the charter guests.

Matt’s making something in a muffin pan, and I want one. Jen bitches to Bri, and Kate walks in. In her interview, Kate says she’s thankful for every day she works with Jen, because she’s one step closer to not working with her. The Valor drops anchor. Captain Lee watches Matt, who can’t figure out why the captain isn’t loving his cooking. Those are quiches in the muffin pan. I still want one.

Nico says he did respect EJ, and learned a lot. He wants to channel into being a focused leader, but not a d*ck, and wants to end the season strong. The guests love he quiches, and I want one even more. The water toys are set up. The captain will be joining the guests for dinner, and Kate irons his white uniform. Some of the guests go off on jet skis. Matt thinks maybe he should pack his bags now. Kate tells Bri there’s a disco party tonight.

Nico is called to the wheelhouse. Captain Lee is checking on how things are going. He thinks Nico has more confidence now. The deckhands will step up and get it done, or Nico will drop a hammer on their asses. He tells Nico that if he needs him, don’t call. Kate and Kyle hang out on their break. She’s glad to see a familiar face, and he’s a welcome distraction. They play shag, marry, kill, and eat Doritos. The guests drink mass quantities of white wine.

Baker asks Bri how it’s going. She says riding the roller coaster of Jen. Baker thinks Nico seems calmer, and that Bri has a good effect on him. Bri talks about them going to decompress in St. Martin.

Cutest. Table Setting. Ever. Lot of glow sticks, but it looks better than it sounds.

The captain bugs Matt some more. In his interview, Matt says his goal is not to mess it up. He needs to prove he can do this, and says the meal needs to go perfectly.

Captain Lee says let’s go bust a move. The guests are bummed that it’s their last night. Everyone is dressed in white, and he tells them how lovely they look. In his interview, the captain says having dinner with the guests is awkward, and they sometimes get carried away, but it comes with the territory and you have to roll with it. They take pictures, and sit down to dinner. Jen is picking up what Kyle is putting down, and says he’s an intriguing individual. He’s not a basic bitch. Matt creates salads. He says cooking for the captain is more intimidating than cooking for guests. He hopes they like it, but hopes he likes it more.

Kate serves a scallop salad. One guests complains that the scallops are gummy, and picks them out. In her interview, Kate says charter guests need, want, and expect rich and crazy every night, but Matt isn’t all that. Shelly asks if the captain is coming to their pajama jam, but he says he has paperwork to do. I would too.

Next is salmon, and one of the guests doesn’t eat fish. It wasn’t on the preference sheet, and Matt says he can’t win. All the captain will see is the guests not liking fish, and it looks bad. He makes linguine for the non-fish eaters, and it looks great. A lot better than when I make it with jarred sauce. In his interview, Captain Lee says it was exactly what he doesn’t want to see, and mediocrity is not acceptable. Shelly tells the captain she can do the splits. He looks so bored, I laugh. Jen tells Kyle that Kate’s not happy with her. In her interview, she says it’s refreshing to have someone to talk to who gets her. She has a thing for accents, but doesn’t understand half the sh*t that comes out of his mouth. Too bad he can’t carry around subtitles.

The disco party begins. Shelly says it’s like Studio 51, and another guest has to correct her. In his interview, the captain says there’s always one group of ladies that are batsh*t nuts, but they’re fun. It’s like a lounge atmosphere, but everyone seems drunk and half falling asleep. Shelly sings to Captain Lee, and the other girls wander off. She tells the captain that he’s intelligent, and she loves who he is as a person. Kate doesn’t know what it is with Captain Lee and a certain demographic, but it’s strong. He says there’s a fine line between a lot of fun and sloppy. Shelly does the splits and falls over. The captain makes his excuses, and gets the hell out of Dodge. On the way back to their rooms, one of Shelly’s friends says she’s being mean. Shelly says she’s the primary, and you don’t eff with the primary

A commercial comes on for A Very Kardashian Holiday, and I already know I’ll be skipping that.

Two of the guests realize there probably isn’t going to be much of a pajama party. Matt says fun and exciting isn’t the easiest thing to do. Shelly tells Kate the others are jealous. They think the captain liked her, but she’s the primary and doesn’t care. Kate says she’s sure they’ll regret it in the morning. In her interview, Kate gives the stages of being hammered: this is fun, I love everyone, I really love everyone, I hate you all, I hate my life, and goodnight. Shelly says she needs new friends.

Jen is sleeping when the guests ask for coffee. Kyle offers to make it, and she says her alarm didn’t go off. Yeah, right. She’s lazy. I’m not saying I could do this job, but she’s a lot younger and it’s what she signed up for. Baker swabs the deck. The captain asks Kate how she thinks dinner went. She says the scallops weren’t a hit, but she liked the color. She thinks it was just okay. In her interview, she says Matt just isn’t good enough. Captain Lee says he thought it was better than usual. Kate agrees that Matt made more of an effort, but if the guests had more discerning taste, and less wine, they might not have thought it was as good as they did.

Shelly makes it out of bed. Matt makes omelets. Bloody Marys and Mimosas are ordered. Kate tells Jen there was big time drama with yelling and screaming the night before. In her interview, Kate says she’s had to train plenty of stews, but with Jen it’s different. She started at an older age, and is more set in her ways. She’s no longer at a learning stage in her life. Kate points out that she obviously hasn’t changed her hair style in ten years. Nico asks Bri if she’s happy about the season. She is, but also kind of sad because it went by quickly. In his interview, Nico says Bri has been a great thing for him, and a good escape, but he doesn’t know what he’s doing next. He needs time to assess what he wants to do after the season is over. Yep. She was fine for the boat, but he’s ditching her now.

It’s time to head back to shore. The captain tells Nico, good job. One of Shelly’s friends says it wasn’t funny, and she doesn’t need it in her world. I assume she’s talking about Shelly’s drunken tirade. The guests pack. The docking is frenetic as usual, but the captain pronounces it outstanding. Nico says he may not be bosun, but he takes his job seriously.

The guests say goodbye, and there are lots of hugs. Shelly says it was amazing, five-star, and perfect. She says Matt is so talented, and his salad dressing was off the charts. In his interview, Matt basks in the praise, saying, in in your face. Jen is excited, and hoping for $2K each.

Tip time. Captain Lee thought it was a good charter, and a good job, but they only got $15K. The captain tells Bruno that’s the same look he had. They seem to be stuck at $15K, and he’s not impressed. He says if there’s one mediocre (the word of the day) player, the whole team is mediocre. He wants to see the $25K tip. He tells them to hash it out constructively, and figure out what they’re doing wrong. In his interview, the captain says he’s at his wit’s end. One situation gets solved – the deck crew has turned around – but now Matt is playing it safe. He’s hoping to finish strong, but thinks it’s a distant hope. In her interview, Kate says people think Captain Lee doesn’t know what’s going on, but he does, and his tip meeting speech proves it. The galley is suffering.

Kate asks what everyone wants to see differently from the interior. Kyle says service sets the tone for the beginning of the day, and there was no service when the guests woke up. In her interview, Kate says he can’t be a close friend and have opinions on the boat. Jen can’t believe she trusted Kyle, and he ran his mouth to the person she least wants to hear it. Bri tells Matt to take as much risk as possible. Kate says it’s important that they deliver the best charter food ever. The crew cleans the boat.

Nico calls his mother. He says it hasn’t been easy. His family situation is rocky, since losing his best friend and little brother. It changed his perspective. The BS doesn’t matter; family does.

Kate asks Jen what Kyle was talking about, and she mumbles something about silverware still being in the dishwasher. In her interview, Kate says she knows Jen slept in and is lying to her, because she’s getting defensive. Nico texts his ex-girlfriend.

The captain has a preference sheet meeting with Kate, Matt, and Nico. The primary is Timothy Sykes. Kate calls him a character, and I remember this guy. We flash back to him making a big production about taking money out of the tip in front of everyone because of some stupid infraction. Nico says he sounds like d-bag. He’s celebrating the ten-year anniversary of his teaching company, and bringing his top three employees to reward them for their dedication. Captain Lee tells them the more extravagant, the better. They want fireworks on the beach, and a chef’s choice tasting menu. Kate says he’s particular, but let’s you know what he wants, or what I call an a-hole. She says if you deliver what he asks for, he’s happy. In her interview, she doesn’t want to tell Matt how particular he is, because it will freak him out even more. Although he probably won’t nail it either way. The captain says whatever it takes, get it done.

Kate wants to get off the boat, but doesn’t want to waste time. She’s going to take the wheels, and ride this charter home to good food town. She and Matt decide to discuss it over dinner. She wants to be prepared, but needs to get out.

The crew heads out to a restaurant, with Matt and Kate going somewhere quieter. Kate tells him that this guy must have grown up watching Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, because he wants champagne wishes and caviar dreams.

Bri is curious about what everyone going to do after the season, inferring that she and Nico know what they’re doing. Bruno is getting his visa and seeing some of the US, and Baker is going home, and then on to Bali. Kate continues to give Matt information as he takes notes. The crew has dinner, and Jen puts her fork into Kyle’s gravy to taste it. He says he doesn’t want to eat now, and leaves the table for a smoke. The rest of them explain to Jen that he’s big on table manners. Bruno says he doesn’t like people touching his food. In his interview, Kyle says anyone who effs with his food is dead to him. Wow. Nico tells Jen that he’s food germy. He’s not uptight at all, but strange about his food; it’s his thing. Jen says all she did was put her fork in it; she hadn’t licked it. In her interview, Jen says she was a fool to think she was going to have a great night. She’s the bad guy again. Baker tells Kyle to just say he’s not hungry, and not to blame her; she’s cray. In her interview, she says she’s just trying to keep the peace. Kate finishes going over things with Matt, and thinks it was a great meeting of the minds.

Jen says it doesn’t hurt to get rejected, but Kyle was the one person who distracted her from the bullies. Kate tells Matt it was the most productive meeting of the charter season. They go back to the boat, while the others go on to a bar and have shots, with Kyle being double-fisted. Bri and Nico go back to the boat. Jen is sick of everyone, and says they all hate her, so why be nice? She’s not going to pretend. On their way back to the boat, she wants to stop at a bathroom, but Baker encourages her to keep moving. She gets stupid, like she always does when she drinks, and Baker says she’s being an idiot. Jen calls Baker a whore, and wanders off. Kyle says she’s a moron.

Back on the boat, Jen barges into Nico and Bri’s room, rambling about what happened. Nico says he hears words, but they don’t make sense. Even the subtitles are nonsense. Kyle tells Baker to stick up for herself, and wants to know where Jen gets off calling someone a whore. Jen tells him to butt out; it’s between her and Baker. Baker thinks it’s funny, but Bruno tries to intervene. Jen gets about an inch from his face, and screams at him. He tells her that he’ll lock her in the bathroom if she doesn’t stop it. They’re at the top of some stairs, and he holds her back, but she starts kicking at him. This girl should not drink.

Next time, Kate doesn’t want to hear Jen’s voice, the guests want an alternative watercraft, Bruno gets hurt, and Kate gives Kyle a lecture.

🏡 I watched the premiere of Checked Inn, following If Loving You is Wrong, and it’s delightful. It’s a reality show about a bed and breakfast – The Mansion at Noble Lane in the Poconos – run by Monique Greenwood and her family. She’s looking to create generational wealth with the business, and wants to give guests a very personalized experience. In the first episode, one of the guests was Peabo Bryson and his wife, looking for some quiet, private time. I’ve loved Peabo ever since he sang the theme song for One Life to Live. Although he said he’d be cool, before they left, Monique’s husband just had to ask Peabo to sign one of his albums. It was very enjoyable, and totally positive. A rarity in the world of reality TV.

🍷 Next Monday, Bravo will be airing a Vanderpump Rules How They Got Here special at 9 pm.

🍗 Getting Close…

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving2

November 14, 2017 – Might As Well Call Him Andrew, Travis Stalks Kelly Some More & Maryann Visits the Captain

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Valentin wants to explain to Nina why he’s involved with Cassandra.

Monica tells Anna and Jordan that Andre abandoned his job without so much as a resignation letter. Jordan tells Anna there’s an APB out for him in connection with the Jason Morgan case.

Diane tells Carly that she can’t do anything until Jason tells her to. Carly is disappointed. She leaves, and Diane thinks she doesn’t have the pull she used to with him. Alexis sits down and asks her how Nora came to defend Olivia-J. Diane asks why and Alexis says it’s complicated. Diane is like, seriously?

Real Jason watches Sam from the balcony. He almost walks in, but Other Jason comes home. He talks sweet talk to Sam, and Real Jason comes busting in, telling him get away, and shoots him. Sam asks what had he done, and says she loves Other Jason. Real Jason wakes up yelling her name, and wonders what he’s supposed to do.

Sam asks where Other Jason was last night.

Nina says infidelity is a deal breaker. Valentin says he isn’t being unfaithful, but Nina says his lips were on his hers. He says hers were on his; there’s a difference. When she told him she was in town, he knew he had to meet her, and tell her his life has changed. They’d barely exchanged pleasantries when she kissed him, and Nelle must have been there with her camera. Nina says he could have pushed her off, but he says she’s a complicated part of his past. She’s accepted he’s not available, but she’s not going anywhere. He has to work with her.

Diane asks for one reason Alexis would want that information. She thinks Scotty tried to manipulate Alexis, begging her to visit Julian, where he’d tug at her heartstrings, and she’d get involved in the appeal, looking for details that chowderhead (meaning Scotty) missed. Alexis says she did visit Julian. He’d been attacked, and was bruised with broken bones. He’s going to get himself killed if someone doesn’t do something. Diane says that man nearly destroyed her.

Anna asks if Jordan thinks Andre knew something, and Jordan says according to Franco. He was going to therapy, and Andre provided a death certificate for Andrew. Anna says it was obviously forged, and wonders what Andre is covering up. Jordan tells her that’s why she has an APB out. Anna feels sorry for the Jasons. She knows what it’s like to be confronted with a twin. She wonders if Andre knows who is who.

Other Jason – okay, lets’ start calling him Andrew, because I will totally flip out if he’s not – tells Sam he had a lot to think about. Sam asks if he came to any conclusions. He says he may have twin, but he’s not taking his life. He asks if Sam is with him, and she says of course. He tells her it’s going to be a fight. Sonny and Carly are backing his brother. Sam asks what if he doesn’t pursue it, and Andrew thinks he wouldn’t be there otherwise. It doesn’t matter if he’s crazy or lying. He’s coming after everything Andrew loves, and rest assured he’s not letting him do it. He says, that face. People look at him and think he’s Jason. He can’t prove it because he’s Jason Morgan, her husband.

Carly knocks at Jason’s door. When he answers, she hugs him.

Nina asks if Valentin is going to rob jewelry stores, and split the profits with Cassandra between kisses. He says no kissing and no robbing, and explains that Cassandra is dealing in synthetic opioids. Nina says he’d never be a drug trafficker, no matter how much money is involved. He says it’s not the money; it’s the only way to stop her – take her down from the inside.

Alexis says Julian didn’t ask to see her, and was upset that Scotty told her about him being roughed up. Julian wouldn’t even talk about the attack. Diane says he wants Alexis to forget and move on, and Alexis says, more or less. Diane thinks he’s either pushing her away, so she does the opposite, or he’s sincere. If Julian is a good man, she should honor his sacrifice, and if he’s bad, she should refuse to fall into the trap. Take him at his word, forget, and move on. Alexis says if dies, and she could have done something, she’ll never forgive herself.

Sam says Jason has no documents to prove who he is. How can he lay claim to Aurora? Andrew doesn’t think he’s after the company, but Sonny will advise him to. He wants the guy to be him, the way he used to be. He couldn’t give Sonny more, but Sonny thinks this guy will. Before they end up in court, he needs to get the company up and going, so it will be harder to challenge. Sam says even if his brother doesn’t exist from a legal standpoint, they share DNA, and share the same family.

Carly tells Jason it will be a while before stops hugging him. He tells her it’s okay; he likes that she’s glad to see him. He’s glad to see her. She says without him helping her navigate life, and catching her when she falls, she missed him all the time. He tells her that he’s sorry he wasn’t there. Carly tells him now she has to clean up the messes she made. She handed his life to someone else. Jason says he has a twin brother; now everything makes sense. She says no matter how much she wanted it to be true, not once did she look in his eyes and see Jason’s eyes looking back. If she’d had the courage to face it, he wouldn’t be in this situation, watching Sam go home with Andrew. Jason says Sam loves him, and he can’t move against him without hurting her. He won’t do that.

Nina says, so Valentin is just pretending he’s working with Cassandra while he’s servicing his own agenda. Valentin says he’s no expert on ethics and morals, but Cassandra has money; this is only greed on her part. Nina says she deserves what she gets, but there’s a flaw in his plan. He’s going undercover with no credentials. Valentin tells her that he’s serving in an unofficial capacity to the agent in charge – Anna.

Carly tells Jason that Diane is waiting at the MetroCourt. She’s waiting on fingerprint records, but there’s some question about the federal one. The good news is, he’s been arrested more than fifty times. Ha-ha! Jason doesn’t care; he’s just happy to be home. He tells Carly to just think of another name for him, but not Andrew. She says he should be fighting for his own name, and fighting for Sam. Jason tells her that he had a nightmare. He dreamt that he saw Sam and Andrew together, and shot him. He was dying, and Sam was next to him, saying she loved him. Carly says it sounds awful, but it was just a dream. He doesn’t want Sam caught in middle. Carly says she is, and the only way out is to make a real choice. His brother has to accept who he is, and Sam has to decide if she wants to be with him or him, the real and only Jason Morgan.

There’s a knock at door, and Carly answers, even though it’s Jason’s room. It’s Monica, who asks if it’s the wrong time. Carly says she was just leaving. She asks Jason to please talk to Diane. Monica doesn’t want to intrude; she just wants to look at him. She’s so happy to see him.

Andrew says he hopes when Sam says sharing a family, she means the Quartermaines. He’s not sharing his wife and kids. He babbles unreasonably, and Sam says it’s Sonny they’re really fighting. Even if Sonny wants his brother to be him, he won’t put the kids in the mix. When Sonny sees something he wants, he goes for it. Andrew thinks they should adopt his tactics, starting with Aurora. He’s interviewing for a CEO today. Sam looks at the resume, and tells Andrew to be tough on him. He promises they’ll keep everything that’s theirs. He leaves, and Sam flashes back to her and Jason when we were all practically children.

Carly knocks on the door. She asks if he’s here, and Sam says no. She says good. She needs to talk to her about Jason.

Andrew meets with the potential CEO, Peter. He asks how Peter became available just when they were looking for someone with his background.

Alexis tells Diane that she went to Llanview, hoping for access to Olivia-J, but Nora stonewalled her, saying it wasn’t in her client’s best interest. Diane says any competent attorney would have done the same. She hates to admit it, but Nora is extremely competent. Alexis wonders who she’s billing it to. He siblings wouldn’t be paying, and it can’t be pro bono, since Nora is in a different state. Who would pay a heavy-hitter like Nora to defend Olivia, and why?

Peter tells Andrew that things were unhappy at the company, and he was offered a golden parachute. He was ready for a change, found out the media company had a new owner, and thought it was the perfect opportunity. Andrew asks what he knows about the company, and Peter says it was brutally mismanaged. The only consistent performer is Crimson, but he thinks with work and a coherent business plan, it can turn around. He says it was a good idea to change the name. He asks if Andrew is actually Jason Morgan. Oddly, Andrew doesn’t knock over any tables.

Monica is surprised to see Jason is there. She thought he’d be at Sonny’s. He says he wanted to be on his own, and she says he’s always been independent. Susan is dead, and Heather is evil, and it’s he fault he and his brother grew up apart. They’re lives would have been different if they’d known. Jason says he doesn’t know about Andrew, but likes his life. The only thing he wishes went differently was his unfairness to the family, especially her. She says he was confused, and they didn’t handle it right. They were all wrong. She tells him that she doesn’t know how to act or what to say. He says she doesn’t have to know. He knows she loves him, and he loves her too. They hug.

Nina thinks Valentin has more of a desire to work closely with Anna than stopping the drug trade. He tells her that he’d turned Anna down when she asked. Nina wonders what changed his mind, and he says her and Charlotte. Cassandra orchestrated their meeting, and it was a warning shot. She can take away what he loves. It was an implied threat, and he has to act. He can’t eliminate her; it would only create more problems than it would solve. He has to bring her down. As far as Cassandra knows, he’s under her thumb. Nina says to be clear, she hates the idea of him working with Anna with the fiery passion of a thousand burning suns, but it’s necessary. Valentin says maybe it’s fair that the past bit him, but he’s sorry she has to be dragged in to the mess. She says apology accepted on one condition – he let her help. She thinks she’s in the perfect position to manipulate Cassandra. Valentin says he can’t forbid her to do anything, but he’d rather kill Cassandra than let her go near Nina. She and Charlotte are his life. He can handle anything if they’re safe. Nina tells him okay; be careful, and no unnecessary contact with Anna. He promises there won’t be, and she leaves for work.

Jason tells Monica not to worry, but she says she does, and worries about Andrew too. He’s been wonderful; open and accepting, and they kind of have a bond. Jason says Andrew is easier than him. Monica says, no, they’re different, but she loves them both very much. She knows it will take time to sort things out, and could be a painful journey. She hopes at the end they can be brothers. He’s not sure that’s possible, but she says he kind of has a gift for making the impossible possible. She leaves, and he heaves a sigh, as the returned Jason is wont to do.

Peter says that Andrew bought the company under the name of Jason Morgan. Andrew says there’s no question about his legal identity, but he did have a twin that surfaced. There are rumblings that he might go after what’s his, but the company belongs to him and his wife, and he has every intention of keeping it. They shake hands.

Diane mentions to Alexis that Charlotte’s custody hearing was the same day as Olivia’s hearings. Alexis thinks it’s no coincidence. If Valentin’s lawyer defended Olivia, it’s because he wanted her to. She leaves, and Andrew approaches. He says he’s sure Diane has heard about his twin. He needs to cut him off at the pass before he comes after the company. Diane says she called him because she’s resigning as his attorney. It’s a conflict of interest. She can’t defend his claim that he’s Jason Morgan, because she doesn’t believe he is.

Sam tells Carly to skip it; she already knows what Carly is going to say. Carly tells her she can’t stand by and watch Sam make a mistake. She owes her an apology. She wanted Andrew to be Jason so bad, she pressured him to be someone else, and pressured Sam to accept it. Andrew is a good man, but not Jason. Deep down, Sam knows it. Carly rationalized and made excuses, but that stopped working when she saw him again. She’d thought Sonny had lost his mind, until she saw him and knew. She’d know him anywhere, and so does Sam. She says when Sam looked in eyes, she knew in her heart and soul. The only reason she’s not saying it is out of loyalty to the man she slept with last night. Sam says she didn’t sleep with anyone last night.

Anna tells Jordan that Andre was working on a way to copy a person’s memory and place it in someone else. Jordan thinks that’s disturbing, but Anna says it’s a useful application, even though the ethics are indefensible. The WSB wouldn’t follow through with it, so Andre left. Jordan asks if Anna thinks he pursued it, and Anna says that would explain things.

We see Andre’s passport.

Alexis visits Valentin. She tells him that she needs information. He asks if they’re on speaking terms, and she asks what his association with Olivia-J is.

Nina calls Cassandra. She tells her that she had a cancellation, and asks if she wants to meet at the MetroCourt.

Andrew tells Diane it didn’t take long. If she turns over any of his records to his twin, he’ll have her disbarred. She says his records are sealed, and she’s sending them over to him. He tells her to warn her client to stay away from his family. She says her client is Jason Morgan, and she looks forward to proving it. He tells her to go to hell. Andrew runs into Jason coming out of the elevator, and tells him that his lawyer is waiting.

Diane tells Jason that she just informed his brother that she intends to prove he’s Jason Morgan, and he’s not happy. Jason says it’s just a name. He doesn’t want anyone hurt over this. She says speaking as a lawyer, from what she remembers, he’s a rare client who actually listens, and takes advice. She wants to work in his best interest, but he says he’s worried about Sam’s best interest. She tells him that his name and assets are under a cloud right now, and when he has the legal rights, he can do what he wants, and can sign them over to Sam. He asks what he needs to do, and she tells him to think back to the first time he was arrested in 1996. She needs to subpoena the files

Sam tells Carly that Andrew never came to bed last night. He was strategizing on how to fight her and Sonny. He’s afraid his best friends will take everything away, including her, and hand it over to someone else. Carly says it’s not up to her. She knows Sam’s the one who has to make choice, and she’s sorry for that. Andrew is going to fight, but Jason won’t; it’s not in his nature, and she knows it. He’s just going to step back and wait; be there when she needs him, and back off when she doesn’t. He thinks that’s what will make her happy, and that’s all that matters to him, but it won’t make her happy in her heart. Andrew is a good man and loves her, but Jason owns her heart and soul, and she owns his. It will be the hardest thing she’s ever done, but the best thing for everyone, especially Andrew. Carly leaves, and Sam remembers old stuff again. She’s drunk, and wants to dance with Jason. They fall on floor, and she kisses him.

Tomorrow, Nathan tells Amy to take her own advice, Lulu has great news, Scotty tells Julian they need a miracle to get him out, and Nina knows Cassandra lied.

If Loving You is Wrong

Lushion tells Natalie that the gun was stolen. She says it doesn’t make any sense. He wants her to find out where the gun came from – now. Natalie thought she was legit, but he tells her not to give the number out again. She calls, but the number is out of service. Lushion asks if she knows how this looks for Kelly; like she stole Ramsey’s gun to kill him. The DA will be all over it. He says they’re going over there right now. They go outside, and see Travis lurking around Kelly’s house.

Lushion ask where he’s coming from and what he’s doing there. He stammers that he was stopping by, and Lushion tells him to come over there. He tells Natalie to get in the house. He asks what Travis was doing and he says knocking on the door. Lushion says the door is right there. Travis says she prefers him to go to the back. Lushion tells him not to move. He knocks on Kelly’s door. He asks if Travis was knocking, but she didn’t even know he was there. Travis tells her not to act like that, and she says she told him to stay away. Lushion asks if he doesn’t have a restraining order against her, and Travis says he does. Lushion asks why he’s hanging around then, and he says he’d heard she had trouble. Lushion tells him he’s under arrest. Travis asks if Lushion has any idea who his parents are. Lushion tells him to quit whining like a little bitch, cuffs him, and puts him in the car.

Lushion goes around back to check it out. Travis sits in the car laughing, because he’s batsh*t crazy. Kelly asks if he thinks it’s funny. He says she’s funny; all this is funny. He tells her that she’s going to jail for life. She messed with the wrong guy, leading him on and ignoring him. Kelly asks if that’s why he killed Ramsey, and called Justice. He pretends not to know what she’s talking about, and tells her she’ll wish she never met him. She already does, and he says she ain’t seen nothin’ yet. She tells him to give it his best shot. He says he did, but she couldn’t take it. Lushion tells her to go inside. He’s taking Travis in, and sending over a detective to look around.

Steven sits in his car outside of Esperanza’s house. She pulls up, and asks why he’s there. He tells her that he’s checking on her, and she says she already has one crazy ass showing up. Steven says he wanted to make sure she was okay, and he’s sorry. He knows how Eddie can get. Esperanza says he’d never touch her, so Steven can go. He asks if he can come in. He can help her clean up. She tells him that he created the mess, and he says it wasn’t his fault. She thinks it’s a ploy to get in the house, but he says no. He tells her she’s amazing, and they can finish what they started. She asks if it’s a marathon. She doesn’t know how they got here, but they don’t know each other. He tells her to ask him a question. She asks when her birthday is, and he knows. She asks what her favorite color is, and he says she doesn’t have one. She’s surprised, and he tells her that he knows by watching her. She says that’s creepy, and he says she wanted it just as bad as he did. She tells him they just work together. He asks again to come in, and she says, purple. He asks if that’s a yes, and when she got a favorite color. She tells him today, when she saw his underwear. He asks if he can please come in, and she closes the door.

Natalie – who never walks, but strides – goes over to Kelly’s house. She asks if Kelly is all right. Kelly wonders what she’s supposed to do. She can’t keep taking this anymore. Natalie says Lushion wants to tell her something about the gun, and Kelly asks her what it is. She says the gun was stolen, but she’d thought it was legit. Kelly says she’ll call, and Natalie tells her the number is disconnected. She says the bad part – Kelly is like, that’s not the bad part? – is that it was stolen from Ramsey. Kelly asks if Travis knew where it was stolen from, and how Natalie does. She says Natalie set her girl up, and Natalie promises to go by the gun seller’s house. Kelly quietly freaks.

Ian and Marcie go to dinner. She doesn’t believe he wanted to celebrate, and he says he likes her. He finds her very attractive. She thanks him, but says she’s not interested. He says it’s just a client/realtor dinner then. He jokingly asks what’s wrong with him? She says she just had enough with her ex relationship. He tells her okay, but he’s buying. She tells him that she doesn’t have much of an appetite. He asks if it’s the company, but she says it’s the ex company. He asks if he’s still bothering her, and says they can sue him. He’s sued people into submission using the law as a tool. She probably won’t win, but he’ll leave her alone. Marcie says he doesn’t know him. Ian’s phone rings. He says he’s at dinner, he doesn’t know the client, and to call Larry. They don’t know where he is, so Ian says call the client’s parents, and he’s on his way. After he hangs up, he tells Marcie it can wait. The client is a spoiled rich kid in trouble, and his parents pay them well. He wants to toast, and she says just water for her. He asks if she doesn’t drink, and she says not lately.

Lushion tells Travis quit playing with him. He plops Travis in a chair. Eddie gets in Lushion’s face. He’s angry because Lushion interfered with him walloping Steven. He says his tattoo is all over that broad. Lushion points out Travis, and asks if Eddie sees this fool. That’s what a stalker looks like, and he’ll be their next one. Eddie threatens Lushion and Steven, and Lushion tells him if he thinks he’s pulling anther Andrew, think again. Eddie says people disappear all the time, and to tell that punk if he touches Esperanza again, it’s his ass. Steven comes in, and Lushion says Eddie has something to tell him. Eddie tells Steven to watch his back, and Steven says he’d rather watch Esperanza’s. BA-DUM-CHH! Eddie says keep coming at her, and he’ll be sorry. He tells Steven that says they can wrap it up real quick mano a mano. Steven says he’ll meet him after the shift. Lushion tells them to go somewhere. Eddie leaves, and Steven asks if everything is okay here. Lushion says it is.

Lushion asks what Travis was doing in Kelly’s backyard. Travis says he already told him, but Lushion says he told him nothing. Travis asks why he should say anything without his lawyer. He asks if it isn’t the detectives who ask the questions? Lushion asks why he’s stalking Kelly, but Travis insists he’s not stalking anybody; she’s lying. He tells Lushion that Officer Dion knows the whole story. He asks if Lushion is on her side, and Lushion says maybe. Travis maintains he didn’t do anything. Lushion asks if he’s sure about that; she’s just lying about all of this? He tells Travis that he’s going to nail his ass to the wall. Travis asks for what, and Lushion says for what he’s been doing. Lushion wants to talk about Ramsey. Travis pretends not to know who that is, and Lushion says Travis murdered him. Travis says he’s a lover not a fighter. He’s a youth pastor, and thou shalt not kill. Lushion asks how he did it; how’d he take Ramsey down? Travis says he doesn’t know what Lushion is talking about. Lushion says Ramsey was a big guy with skills and moves, and Travis asks if he’s talking about the busted ass dude next door to Kelly. Lushion says the memories come flooding back, and asks again how he did it with no skills, not knowing how to fight, and looking bitchy. Travis says he can fight if the situation presents itself. Lushion asks how he took Ramsey down, and tells him that Justice had some interesting stories about how Ramsey died. Travis suggests maybe he did it. Lushion says maybe Travis called him and gave him the details. Travis wishes he could help.

Steve brings in Ian. Lushion says don’t tell him Ian is this kid’s lawyer. Ian calls Travis “Donovan Cain,” Lushion says his name is Travis, and Ian says he didn’t put it together, asking if this is the kid harassing Kelly. He’s not going to be able to rep her. His partner reps Travis’s family and church; he has no choice. They pay a lot to the firm. Lushion says it’s crazy. Ian tells him that he’s sorry, and takes Travis out. Steven says that’s messed up. Lushion says what’s messed up is what he’s doing to Kelly, and he’s not going to stop. He wants Steven to look up Donovan.

Alex and Brad watch TV. Someone bangs on the door. It’s Eddie, who walks right in. Brad says it’s late, get out, and pushes him out the door. Eddie tells him that Esperanza has lost her mind; she’s banging Steven, Brad says, sorry, and Eddie says he doesn’t look it. Brad admits he’s not; she’s single. Eddie says she’s the mother of his kid, and his ass gets whatever he wants. Brad tells him to go home, and he says he doesn’t have one. Brad says he can’t stay there, and he asks Brad to make a call. Brad tells him to go. Eddie offers to do him a favor in return, and Brad says, just go. Eddie repeats that he doesn’t have a home to go to, and Brad says, go somewhere. Eddie says he’ll handle it himself. Brad tells him that he doesn’t understand love, and Eddie says he understands T&A, and when he puts his mark on them, they’re his. He drives off.

Alex doesn’t want to know, and Brad agrees that she doesn’t. She tells him to throw Randal’s equipment away. He picks it up, and asks if the light has been on the whole time; that isn’t good. Alex says it’s disconnected, and Brad says it must have back up battery. He tells her to be quiet. It has a motion sensor, and records video and audio. Brad disables it. Alex is concerned that Randal heard everything they said about the doctor, but Brad thinks if he would have been over there already. Maybe it was out of range. Alex wants him to destroy it. He’s sorry he brought it in. Alex looks like she has a headache.

Randal and Larry go back to Randal’s house. They’re laughing, and saying what a great time it was. Larry wants more to drink, and Randal says he can’t hold his liquor. Larry says Randal likes when he’s out of control. Randal pours some hefty shots of tequila (bleh), and they down them. They laugh some more. Larry asks if Randal remembers when they snuck in the girls’ dorm. He tried to film them, but had a loud ass VHS camera. They have another shot. Randal says Larry got them kicked out of school, and Larry says, but they had a lot of fun. He asks if Randal remembers the girls they did together. Larry says he learned the hard way. Randal says Larry took longer, and teases him. Larry tells him to go to hell, and Randal says he’s been there and back next door. Larry wonders why Randal doesn’t let it go. Randal says no way; she humiliated him. Larry says he humiliated her and Marcie. Randal says they were talking about Alex; he doesn’t care about Marcie because she screwed neighbor in his shed. Larry asks if it’s the same guy whose wife Randal screwed, Randal doesn’t want to do this right now. Larry just wants him to move on; there are lots of women out there for him. Randal doesn’t want lots of women, and Larry says that’s a switch. Randal wants the two women in his life to suffer, and Larry asks for how long? He says until he’s satisfied. Larry says that’s him, and Randal concurs. Larry tells Randal that Marcie really loved him loved him. Randal says she loved him so much, she did the neighbor in his shed, Larry says she was hurt, and Randal asks if that’s why she moved in with him. Larry asks when it ends, and Randal says when she’s on her knees. Larry tells him she’s been through so much, and she’s pregnant. Randal is like, what? Larry realizes he made a mistake, and pretends like he doesn’t know what he said.

Next time, Randal and Larry fight, Alex tells Marcie that her husband doesn’t belong to her, and Travis confronts Kelly. It’s also the finale.

Below Deck

Jen wants to strangle Kate, but she’s a good person, and trying to suppress the feeling. Bri and Nico cuddle. Bri says it’s difficult working with someone who thinks they’re working hard, when they’re not. She thinks Jen is so tired, she’s delirious, and not helping. She tells Jen to go to bed, and finishes cleaning up by herself.

EJ says he’ll miss Baker. He’ll miss 90% of the crew, but there are some he could do without. He and Baker lie on cushions on the deck. He can’t believe he’s leaving tomorrow. She says they can make the most of it. He does a couple of push-ups, and they go to bed separately. I’m confused.

Captain Lee says it’s safe to take guests out for morning cruise. Nico is feeling a little better. He’s put things in perspective, and is going to be team player and do good job. Kate tells him not to be too cool for a sling. Jen stumbles out of her bunk. In the galley, Kate says the longer she’s late, the more she’ll pay for it. Jen doesn’t feel good, and Kate says none of them do. Kate tells her she can handle it. In her interview, Kate says Jen has problems and she gives her solutions, but she finds more problems in the solutions that then become new problems. The Valor moves out, and everyone gets excited. The captain says once around the park, and he’s only doing it for the money. Nico realizes he’s been a d*ck to EJ. He hasn’t been in the right frame of mind since his brother died. He has to respect EJ, and admit the deck team has come a long way.

The breakfast special is Eggs Benedict – my favorite! Matt loves a challenge, and he’s being challenged to every extent. He’s tired of seeing their faces though. They begin to head back to the marina, and the guests complain. In his interview, EJ says the deck team is in a better place than when he came; they’re much more proficient. The guests start packing.

Everyone says goodbye. Eden says it was great, but there was disappointment. It was a big deal to birthday boy Jason and Michaela, but she thinks it was a downer for them too. She doesn’t even know where they are, and thinks they left. What was the crew supposed to do about the weather? Change it?  These people are worse than eBay buyers, who want the moon for nothing.

Eden says the crew was great, but if it was her restaurant, a lot of things would have been sent back. In his interview, Matt says nice of her to wait until the last minute to destroy his food in front of the crew and captain. He bets her restaurant stinks. She says the food could have been taken to another level. Kate has never worked a cruise where the primaries just left the boat. I wonder what this means for the tip.

Captain Lee thought it went well for not having gotten off the dock. He’s surprised with the assessment, and doesn’t see what they could have done differently. There is a tip, and it’s $15K or $1363 each. The captain tells them that EJ is leaving to get back to his other boat, and thanks him for helping out. EJ did everything he asked him to, and well. In his interview, Captain Lee says Nico is going to have to step up. They all bid farewell to EJ. The captain says his wife, Maryann is coming. In his interview, he says it’s very rare for her to join him, and he’s excited, but has enough to worry about. Jen wonders why everybody is getting lovin’ except her.

In her interview, Baker is sorry things didn’t get to take off with her and EJ, but plans on seeing him after the season is over. Nico is glad he’s leaving, and boot him back to Canada. He’s ready to take charge. I wonder what happened to his better attitude of five minutes ago. EJ says his goodbyes, telling everyone to finish hard. He kisses baker’s hand. In his interview, he says he’s leaving them in a much better place. The deck team has graduated, and Nico will make an excellent bosun, if he drops the ego, and stops being a child. He still has a long way to go.

The next charter is a group of eight women, the primary being Shelly, who’s an attorney. The captain says they’re not requesting anything crazy, but want gourmet meals. In his interview, Captain Lee says it’s embarrassing to have a guest shred his chef a second time. We flash back to the first time and the Bananas Foster ice cream debacle. They want a Caribbean Carnival theme night with a surf and turf dinner, entertainment, and games. The captain also tells them that they’re getting a new deckhand. Nico hopes whoever it is, isn’t green.

Here comes Maryann. In his interview, the captain says the season has been trying with a green interior and deckhands, and crappy weather. Seeing Maryann will be a pleasure.

In her interview, Jen says Kate failed her as a boss and mentor. She looked up to her, but Kate was abusive. She has no respect for her. Kate talks about how much she loves the captain and Maryann (♫ Here on Gilligan’s Isle! ♫). She tells us they were high school sweethearts. Maryann is quite cute

Nico is excited to get off the boat and spend time with Bri. It’s been high stress all season. The crew heads out to dinner, with Captain Lee and Maryann joining them. Bri asks how they met, and Maryann says her girlfriends knew him, and he doesn’t remember meeting her. He asks how she can hold him responsible for something he doesn’t remember, and she says they met again a month later, and that was it. We see some old photos of them as a couple, and the crew toasts to them. In his interview, Captain Lee says that they’ve been married forty-two years, and Maryann has the patience of a saint to put up with him and five kids. He was lucky enough to marry his best friend. He tells the crew that relationships take work. He cares more about making his wife happy than making himself happy. If he sees a smile on her face, he’s good. He says he’s very fortunate, and I’m impressed. It’s nice to see the other side of him. Nico and Bri leave. Nico says it’s nice to see a functional relationship in yachting. You don’t see it often, especially with captains.

They talk about losing EJ, and make a toast. Bri and Nico arrive at the hotel, and the rest go back to the boat. In her interview, Kate says Bruno was quiet, Matt didn’t get obnoxious drunk, and Nico is getting lucky. The dinner was a success.

Kate calls someone about their website for acrobats who do yachts. I swear, there’s something for everyone out there. She can’t believe she’s never done a carnival theme party before. In his interview, Captain Lee says he and Maryann don’t communicate all that much when he’s at sea, and it was a treat to see her. He tells us the finish line is in sight. Maryann leaves.

The captain says Nico is back in charge, and he wants to finish strong. The weather should be good. The new deckhand arrives, and Kate says, look who it is, and they go to commercial. I’m wracking my brain for previous deckhands, and can only remember Danny.

It’s Kyle in flamingo shorts. They flash back to when he was on before, and now I remember him somewhat. Captain Lee says he knows the boat and he’s competent. He’s a character, but he can count on Kyle to fulfill their need for next two charters. He’s British, and one of the guys they need subtitles for because his accent is so thick. He was bunkmates with Kate, and she wishes she could give him a warm welcome, but she’s too busy. Nico interduces him around. He tells Kyle they’ve had green deckhands, and a Boy Scout bosun who pissed him off. Kyle has been on cargo ships, and tells us he’s become more of a provider, and it’s made him grow up.

In his interview, the captain says he was embarrassed as hell last charter. The crew had better be on their toes, or give their soul to Jesus, because their asses belong to him. He’s quite the quipster, our Captain Lee. The ladies arrive, and Kate does the tour. The deckhands remark how heavy their suitcases are, and it reminds me of my father asking me if I carried bricks in my purse. Kate says girls’ trips are one of two ways, either super fun or super high maintenance. Shelly tells them to keep the champagne flowing. Nico says the pressure is back on. Drinks happen. Kyle tells Jen he likes her. He could win and argument with her easily. They should get married. I also remember Kyle being a bit of a weirdo.

Nico tells the guests that he’s getting toys out. Shelly asks what kind of toys, and another guest says they like toys. Shelly thinks Nico should take of his shirt. In his interview, Nico says he loves cougars, something I will never be. I liked them older when I was younger. Matt says he has a lot to prove after the last charter. He has a clean slate, and he’s ready to cook. The ladies are served a beautiful salad, and say Matt is amazing.

Kyle says his type of girl doesn’t necessarily need a vagina, and I remember he had a trans girlfriend. Bruno says he doesn’t look at gender, but how he feels. He’s had both girlfriends and boyfriends, and looks at sexuality as fluid. His heart falls in love with a beautiful heart. This is all too poetic for me

The dreaded slide is set up. Nico is taking what he’s learned, and apply it to now. In the galley, Jen says she hasn’t been whoring around as long as Kate, and Kate asks how old her daughter is. Jen says Kate is taking too far, which I think is overly sensitive, since she started it and that was a funny remark in context.

Kate makes stuff with feathers, and they get ready for Caribbean party. Jen tells Kate it was a low blow, and Kate says Jen said she whored around. Jen wants her not to be miserable, and Kate says Jen doesn’t know enough to determine that; she’s highly out of line. Jen says it’s friend to friend, and Kate says Jen isn’t her friend. In her interview, Kate says she was blindsided. She thought they were having fun banter, and Jen brought in her personal life when she knows nothing about her. She’s just being mean.

The table is colorful and glorious. Jen thinks Kate crossed the line, but doesn’t think an apology will happen. The captain hangs around the kitchen, asking if the food is under control. Matt says they’re writing the for tomorrow. Bruno is helping, and Captain Lee says he has every confidence that Matt can come up with the menu on his own. He wonders why Matt is depending on a deckhand for ideas. The guests love the surf and turf. Shelly says it would be a great last meal. When the mostly clean plates come back, Matt says the ladies did a good job. He and Bruno agree they’re tigers

After dinner, Kate leads them upstairs, where an acrobat does amazing things, hanging from a giant ring. Kate tells us it’s nice to have someone else bending over backwards for the guests. The ladies want Nico to twirl on the ring.

Kyle watches Jen, and asks how the dating scene is. She tells him nothing exciting, and he says he’ll take her out. He guarantees two things – it will be an effing blast, and she’ll feel a lot better about herself. Jen isn’t too interested, but thinks it’s a welcome change to have someone talking nice to her. Captain Lee calls Kate to the wheelhouse. He’s concerned with what saw in the galley. He wants to pull Bruno out of there. In her interview, Kate agrees he spends too much time there, but thinks it might make the situation worse. The captain calls Nico next, and says he thinks Bruno is hindering Matt, and wants him doing deckhand things. In his interview, the captain thinks Matt has an unknown fear of putting himself out there. He’s hoping he’ll piss Matt off so much, he’ll want to show that SOB. He says the next charter is important.

Bri suggests she and Nico travel after the season is over. The Valor heads to St. Martin. Kate tells Jen that she’s still grumpy about what Jen said. Jen tells Kate if her boss implies she’s a whore, she’s going to stand up for herself. She thinks they’re just going in circles, and when she’s pushed to the boiling point, it’s best to walk away. Nico tells Bruno they need him on the deck, so no more helping Matt. Bruno has no comment, but thinks it’s unfair.

The captain calls Matt to the bridge, and asks if he’s running out of gas. Matt says he’s good. Captain Lee wants him to pull out all the stops. He thought last night’s dinner was okay, but he wasn’t blown away. Matt should get out of his comfort zone, and Bruno needs to get out of the galley. In his interview, Matt says the guests claimed it was the best meal they ever ate, but he’ll surpass it. In his interview, he says he’s burnt out. The girlfriend thing didn’t work out, and the guests have been critical. He can’t wait for the season to be done.

Next time, Shelley sings to the captain, Jen argues with Bruno, and Bri is called a whore.

🍻 New show RelationShep, starring Shep from Southern Charm, begins Monday, December 4th at 10 pm.

🍚 I hate when a fortune cookie has some saying like home is where the heart is. They’re supposed to tell me who I’m going to meet or where I’m going to travel or something like that. They’re not proverb cookies.

⚓ Views of the Captain and his Lady…

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BelowDeckCaptain&Maryann

BelowDeckCaptainLee2

November 7, 2017 – Amy Finds Her Brother, Larry Has a Shady Past & a Charter at the Dock

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

 

General Hospital

Nathan and Maxie are doing a home photo shoot. Maxie reminds the photographer that the article is about her. He wonders who the person is who hasn’t smiled since he got there. Maxie tells him it’s her assistant and she’s thrilled to be there. Amy says, she’s thrilled.

Monica asks Finn if he can stay later. A John Doe was brought in with an opioid overdose and also has a serious infection.

Valentin tells Anna that he’s past needing to prove himself to her. Anna says even though he’s clean, it obviously struck a nerve. He says he looks at the world through the eyes of a father now, and doesn’t want the drugs in his community. Anna says he should tell Cassandra that he’s taking her up on her offer, and he can be a spy for her. He says, no way in hell.

Nina and Charlotte have ice cream at the MetroCourt after seeing Disney on Ice. Charlotte asks if she could be figure skater, and Nina says she can be anything she wants. She had thought Charlotte wanted to be a vet, but she wants to be both. Nina tells her she wanted to be a ballerina and on an equestrian tea when she was younger. Charlotte asks if she did, and Nina says definitely not, but her life turned out better than she imagined, now that she has someone like Charlotte in it. She tells Charlotte that she loves her, and Charlotte says she loves Nina too. Charlotte thanks her, and says she’s wonderful. Nina says she wasn’t trying to be; she just wanted Charlotte to have fun. Charlotte says that’s what makes her wonderful.

Cassandra and her companion enter the restaurant. Cassandra wants something exotic, like a strawberry daiquiri. Her companion says she’s allergic, but she tells him Finn told her that she’s not, so she’s going for it. She sees Nina and Charlotte. She calls them the apples of Valentin’s eye, and thinks she needs to take it up a notch.

Alexis goes to Pentenville to visit Julian, who doesn’t look very beat up, but is sporting a fresh haircut. He asks why she’s there, and she asks why this happened to him.

Finn looks at John Doe’s chart and says he’s close to respiratory failure, and must have been ignoring his condition. Monica tells him to find the right protocol.

Cassandra pretends to trip over a shoe-box with skates near Charlotte’s chair. She asks if Charlotte is taking skating lessons, but Charlotte says she’s not supposed to talk to strangers. Cassandra says she’s obviously been raised right, and is sorry for interrupting. Charlotte tells her that she took skating last winter, but she’s taking ballet now. Cassandra suggests she take skating as well; it will improve her ballet skills and vice versa. She tells Charlotte that she did, sometimes having both lessons in the same day. She says she even competed, but it was nothing professional; she wasn’t very good. Nina asks her to join them, and Cassandra says she’d like to, since her dinner companion hasn’t arrived. Her real companion takes photos with his phone from across the room.

Julian tells Alexis it was nothing and he’s fine. She says he’s obviously not fine, and asks if he was targeted. He surprised to see her, and thinks Scotty must have told her about it. He says they both agreed he belonged in there. She asks if he started it, or was provoked or ambushed, and he tells her to let it go. He didn’t start a fight, not the way she means, but they both know enough about the criminal justice system to know bad things happen. She asks if he can’t buy protection, and he says sometimes that works, but it doesn’t mean he won’t be a target. She asks if another crime family is after him, and doesn’t think he’s telling the whole story.

The photographer finishes the shoot, saying Nina will love it and he’ll send the proofs tonight. When he’s gone, Amy says she didn’t need to be there. She’s supposed to write the article, not watch Maxie pose. She has to get to work, and could have used more notice. Maxie asks if she means like the notice Maxie was given when they decided to go behind her back. Amy tells her not much subterfuge was needed, since she was living on the other side of the country. She says they can still be exposed. Maxie tells her that Nina demanded an exclusive, and this is as exclusive as it gets. When the readers see how blissfully happy she and Nathan are, they’ll stop trolling her on Twitter. Amy says she’s sorry Maxie is having a hard time, and that she thought Nathan was cheating, but she can’t reach her brother. She could have been making calls instead of watching Maxie put on stupid sexy outfit after stupid sexy outfit. Maxie says she can write it, and Amy can leave. Nathan tells Maxie to take this with love, but Amy isn’t going anywhere.

Cassandra talks about her first double-axel. She says it was in a local competition, but she felt like she was in the Olympics. Alas, a knee injury ended her career. She encourages Charlotte again to take both skating and ballet, saying both skills will improve. She tells Charlotte that if she masters the basics, she can do anything. Charlotte says that’s what her papa tells her. Cassandra says a man after her own heart, and asks where he is tonight.

Valentin tells Anna that she doesn’t know what Cassandra is capable of. Anna says the WSB has extensive intel on her. Valentin says she’s become a recluse, and also a hypochondriac, but has mostly eliminated those who have gone against her. Anna says she hasn’t eliminated him, whether it’s because he’s too formidable or she wants him for something, and he’s in a perfect position to gain access to her. Valentin says if she becomes motivated to act, she also becomes very dangerous.

Julian tells Alexis that he’s stopped trying to get her to trust or love him. In the past, he badly betrayed her trust, and he wants to make it right, but he doesn’t want her here. He thinks it’s probably part of Scotty’s stupid plan. He doesn’t concern her anymore, but wonders if there’s another reason she’s there. Alexis tells him there’s been a development that he has a right to know, and she might as well be the one to tell him.

Maxie types, and Amy laughs at what she’s writing. She says Maxie is giving too much background; that’s why she’s here. Nathan says that too many details could trip them up later. Amy says it might prompt too many fan questions, and Mac is one of Man Landers’s biggest fans. Maxie says Amy barely said anything, and she’s just writing answers to the questions fans want to know, like what to give when flowers aren’t enough? Amy says they don’t really ask things like that, and comes up with something else, conferring with Nathan. Maxie says enough; stop right now. She asks whose article is this anyway?

Alexis asks if Julian has had access to newspapers or the internet in the past week, but he says he’s been in the infirmary. She says that Jason bought Derek Wells Media. Julian thought it would be a good way to cut ties, but realizes it looks like a mobster transfer of power. Jason assured him he has nothing to do with the mob, and he’s just setting something up for Sam and his children. Alexis says Sam’s husband might not be Jason after all.

Finn says doctor stuff, and tells Monica they should see the results soon. He wants to monitor the patient. She says a nurse can call him if there are any changes. He says that she knows about his own struggle, and he didn’t even connect the dots between himself and the opioid epidemic. He says there’s an artificial wall between doctors and patients, and he was reminded why he went to medical school in the first place. It’s all related.

Nina tells Cassandra that her husband has lot meetings, sarcastically adding that she’s sure he’s heartbroken about missing the ice show. Cassandra says he missed the opportunity to spend time with Charlotte, but Nina says don’t worry they’ll tell him all about Disney on Ice. Cassandra thinks he’ll remember the remember conversation for a long time.

Anna says Valentin is a lot of things, some of which she despises, but she never took him for a coward. He says never trouble trouble until trouble troubles you. He believes in letting sleeping dogs lie when family is involved. I never took him for a dude who spouts clichés. Anna says his family can be safeguarded. He tells her she’s not hearing him. He’s not going to help, and if she doesn’t back off, he’ll blow her investigation.

Nathan tells Maxie it’s not her article, but she says the fans want to know about Man Landers and his wife. He says Nina will love it, and shows her some pictures the photographer sent. Amy says that’s it; ten questions, and she has time to call Chet on the way to her real job. Maxie says he’s the reason they’re keeping the secret, so if it’s about anyone, it’s her brother. Nathan thanks her, and Amy leaves. He says it’s done, and Maxie will look so gorgeous, he’ll have to fight the guys off. He goes to take a shower, and Maxie looks at what Amy wrote. She’s like, no, this won’t do, and says she needs to punch it up a little.

Julian asks Alexis how that’s possible. She says that’s what they’re trying to figure out, and she has no idea. He asks if Sam is okay, and she says, physically, yes. Real Jason saved her from drowning. Julian asks how Sam is able to wrap her head around any of it, and how is she coping after finding out the man who’s her husband could be someone else? Alexis doesn’t want to talk about Sam, thinking she wouldn’t appreciate it. She says if Sam’s husband isn’t Jason, he’ll have to sort out the legality regarding the company. She tells him be careful in there.

Cassandra says she’s taken up enough time; maybe they could all go skating this winter. She suggests they take a selfie before she leaves. She takes the photo, and they exchange numbers. She says they should have lunch some time. Charlotte tells her that she liked her stories, and Cassandra thanks her for the conversation. She’s glad they crossed paths, and thinks they’re going to be good friends.

Valentin tells Anna the conversation is over She says this has to be stopped, and he says it won’t be if Cassandra covers her tracks. She’ll be gone like the wind, and go underground. If he tells her about the investigation, they’ll have nothing, and never see her again. Anna says the drugs have killed more people than HIV at the height of the epidemic. Valentin wants Anna to bring Cassandra down, but not implicate him. If she does, she’ll have nothing.

Nathan asks Maxie why she didn’t join him, and she says she was busy. He asks if she’s still mad, and she says no, everything is perfect – now. She used her professional judgement to tweak what Amy wrote. He looks at it, and says she basically put back her made-up story about how she discovered Man Landers. Maxie says it was dry, and needed a personal aspect. He says it’s supposed to be a puff piece, and she says it is – a look inside the life of Man Landers. Nathan says it would be if he was Man Landers. The fewer details, the better. Maxie wants to know why he keeps defending Amy. He says he’s not; that’s how he feels. She tells him it’s duly noted, but what she wrote is what’s going to press.

Monica asks Finn if there’s any news, but he says they need to know who he is, and his medical history. Monica says he’s obviously had several surgeries, and she thinks he’s a veteran. Finn says the guy has been through hell, and Monica says so has Finn, but he still functions even with his battle. She doesn’t think John Doe would have lived If Finn hadn’t stayed. He says that’s his job, but she says he needs relaxation too. Finn says he just had time off, but she says it didn’t sound like much of a vacation. He says it wasn’t really.

Cassandra says she’ll be in touch. Nina and Charlotte leave, and Cassandra asks her companion if he got what she wanted. He tells her that he got lots of photos, and thinks the selfie was genius. She tells him she thought about the value of Valentin discovering them together, but given his territorial behavior and temper, it’s a good thing they just left. She says she just texted him, and voila! here he is.

Valentin tells her that he’s not staying, and asks why she wanted to meet. She says she has a lovely surprise to share. He asks why would he care? She tells him that she met his wife and daughter, and shows him the pictures. She says they’re both delights, and they hit it off, but she wonders about Charlotte. Nina is a terrific stepmother, and Charlotte adores both her and her papa. Valentin asks what the point is, and Cassandra says she was wondering how Charlotte would feel about her papa if she discovered what he did with and to Claudette.

Julian hangs up the phone. On his way out, a big dude pushes him out of the way. Julian and Alexis look at each other.

Nathan tells Maxie to use Amy’s draft; it’s what Nina wanted. Maxie accuses him of stopping her from putting herself in, and he says it’s not for the reason she thinks. There’s still a chance this could blow up in their faces. They committed fraud, and she’d be committing it too. She loves that he’s trying to protect her, but says no one reads articles in Crimson; they just look at the fashion. She just sent it to the publishing team. Their fate is sealed.

At the hospital, Deanna tells Amy that Finn wants to know if there are any changes at any time with John Doe. Amy takes his chart, and goes into the room. She says, omg, Chet. It’s her brother. Why I didn’t put two and two together right away with this one, I’ll never know. I’m slipping.

Monica says it’s been a long night; she’s heading out. Finn wants to see if John Doe’s numbers improve. Monica says the synthetic opioids snuck up on them. They’re cheap and deadly, and they have to find a way to cut off the supply. Finn would like to see it happen too.

On the phone, Anna says the case isn’t working out, and she has to rethink the priorities for the WSB, and her too. She doesn’t give up. One way or other, she’ll get Cassandra.

Cassandra tell Valentin that his wife is delightful, and his child is scrumptious. She understands why he loves them, and thinks they’re a good influence on him. She can’t imagine what would happen were he to lose them – for whatever reason. She says, so, about her operation… Valentin says he’s in’

Alexis bangs on the window. The guard takes Julian, and the thug looks at Alexis.

Tomorrow, Valentin tells Anna that he’ll help her, Michael says it’s over with Nelle, and Sonny asks Klein who gave him the order.

If Loving You is Wrong

When we last left, Eddie busted in while Esperanza and Steven were getting busy.

Eddie attacks Steven, and they fight. Esperanza yells for them to stop. Lushion comes in, and breaks it up. He tells Eddie to calm down and asks what’s going on. Can’t he tell? He tells Eddie to get out. Eddie says, me and you, to Steven, and leaves. Lushion asks what’s going on, and where are Steven’s clothes?

Steven says, sorry, and Esperanza tells him to get out; the both of them, out now. Steven and Lushion leave, with Steven half-dressed. Lushion asks if he’s crazy. Steven says he was fixing the wall, spilled paint on himself, and Esperanza offered to wash his clothes. It just happened. Lushion tells him to get in the car.

Ian calls Marcie at work; he wants to talk about the house. He asks a question about the vents, and she says she’ll call the realtor. He wants to see the house again, and asks if they can meet later; he has to meet a client across the street. She asks who, but he’s not at liberty to say. She tries to get information, but he tells her not to do this to him. She asks if it’s Randal, and he says, who? She tells him that Randal is her ex. He asks if Randal knows Larry, and she says they were college roommates. Ian says he wouldn’t represent that guy for anything. He hopes the divorce is over with soon.

Brad pours some wine for him and Alex. The baby is having a nap, so it must be wine o’clock. Brad asks what the doctor said, and Alex says the baby is doing well, but he meant the DNA test. Alex tells him the doctor switched it. He says she rewound their lives. He can’t believe it, and Alex says she was shocked. Brad tells her that they won’t have to deal with Randal until the baby gets older. Alex tells him they’ll cross that bridge when they come to it, but for now, they’re good. Alex is glad Brad is back, and he’s glad to be home. Could we please name this baby? Please? We see that the camera light is blinking. Uh-oh. Even though Brad tore it down, wouldn’t there still be a companion piece inside Randal’s house?

Here’s what I’m thinking. Obviously, the doctor didn’t switch the tests, but obviously the baby is Black. If Alex isn’t lying about being with anyone else, that means somewhere along the line there are Black relatives. It would make sense if they were on her side, since her parents were so radically racist. Maybe Rusty wasn’t her real father?

Natalie tells Kelly the house looks good; Kelly says it looks better. She thanks Natalie for everything, even helping her with the gun. Natalie says they need to talk about that. Kelly says she’s getting rid of it, but the police have it right now. She can’t believe Justice touched it. She wants to punish him, but he’s going through so much. Travis is messing with her child, and she can’t let him do that. Natalie says it’s getting out of hand, and Kelly says she just wants to go on with her life, but he won’t let her. She’s tried everything, and can’t keep dealing with this.

There’s a knock at the door. It’s Ian. Kelly asks if the police took the gun, and he says they did. Natalie and Kelly are relieved. Natalie asks if it had a serial number. Out of Ian’s earshot, Kelly asks Natalie if that girl sold her an illegal gun, but Natalie says no, she was just asking.

Outside, Natalie calls Lushion. She tells him the police took Kelly’s gun. She asks if it having a serial number means it’s legit. He says it could have been stolen, and she asks him to find out. He chastises Natalie for steering Kelly that way in the first place. She asks him to just find out about the number.

Natalie visits Alex and Brad. She wants to talk to Alex, but Brad needs to hear this too. She asks if it’s Lushion’s baby, and if Alex is sure. Alex says she’s never had anything going on with Lushion. Natalie wonders where it’s coming from then. Alex says she’s sorry, but she was in a bind. All she said was that Randal wasn’t the father, and Natalie asks why Lushion is involved. Alex says it was Randal’s idea. Natalie wonders why the test didn’t match Randal’s, and Brad says a doctor friend helped them out. Natalie seems to accept that, and he says he believes Alex. Natalie thanks them.

When she’s gone, Alex asks if Brad thought that was a good idea. What if she tells someone? He says it’s not good either way. He says she hates Randal as much as they do. Alex says if she flies off the handle, she might open her mouth. Brad doesn’t think so, and Alex hopes he’s right.

Ian tells Kelly they’ve been watching Travis, and all he ever does is go to church and back home, and spends time with his fiancé. She says he has time to harass her with hang-up calls. Ian suggests they get the phone records and texts. He asks if she’s positive Justice had nothing to do with it, and she’s surprised he’s even asking. He says he can talk to the DA and see if Travis will come in. Kelly is shocked they have to play nice with him, and Ian tells her to be patient. They’ll get him. She asks when she can get her gun back, but he says it’s in evidence. She tells him she needs protection. He says he’ll see what he can do, but tells her to start learning how to use it and get a safe.

Marcie pulls up just as Ian is getting to the house. The vents are acceptable. She says the owners will cover the closing costs if he moves up the date. He says as long as the inspections are good, he’s fine with that. She knows the company, and says she’ll have them put a rush on it. She goes back outside while he looks around again. Randal pulls up. Marcie starts laughing, and he says they’ll see who’s laughing soon. She thinks she’s slick, and thinks Larry will be on her side. She tells Randal to sign the papers. He tells her no, and she says she gave him everything, just let her out. He says no, and she calls him an ass. Ian comes out, and asks if she’s okay. Randal asks if Ian is screwing his wife. Ian wants Marcie to look at the kitchen, and Randal suggests she show him the bedroom too.

Marcie apologizes, and Ian asks if she’s sure she’s okay. She says she’s used to it. He asks if Larry is repping her, and what he’s doing to get it over with. She says he’s working on it, but Ian doesn’t like it. She doesn’t want to talk about it, and asks if he saw what he wanted to with the house. He’s good, and says no second thoughts. He tells her to take him to dinner to celebrate. She says as long as he’s paying. He tells her she’s making the commission, but she says he’s a gentleman. He says so he’s been told, and agrees.

Randal arrives at the bar, and sees Larry talking to a couple. Randal tells them not to believe anything he says, and he and Larry move to another table. Larry didn’t think he was coming, and Randal says he almost didn’t. Larry asks why he decided to come, and Randal says because Larry is buying; he owes him from last time. Randal orders the most expensive cognac. He asks if Larry is representing Marcie. Larry says he’s friends with both of them. Randal says Larry knows him better, and Marcie doesn’t know much about Larry. He thinks Larry wants to determine how angry he is, but Larry says he invited him out because they’re friends. Randal tells Larry that he can see right through him, and Larry’s secret is safe with him. He asks why Larry agreed to rep Marcie when Randal has this on him. Larry says he was looking out for the both of them. Randal says she knows nothing about their past, and Larry asks if he’s sure.

Larry wants to be sure Marcie isn’t playing him. He thought it was strange that she came to him. Randal says she’s broke; she had to come to him. He asks if he can go now, but Larry wants to catch up. He says his wife and kids are out of town, and it’s hard being alone. Randal is like, what? and he says, sorry. Randal mentions the bitch next door, and Larry says Marcie told him he had an affair with a neighbor and there’s a baby. Randal asks if Marcie told him about her sleeping with the neighbor’s husband, and them moving in together. He says the best part is the kid isn’t even his. Larry’s mind is blown. Randal says every time he sees a Black man in the neighborhood, he asks if they know her. Larry says a married woman who lied to her husband, then lied to him, and he’s upset? It doesn’t make sense. Randal says he didn’t know she’d been with another Black man. Larry says he can’t go around asking all of them if they know her. Randal starts laughing, and says he set up a camera, and every time someone comes to her door, he gets an alert. Larry says it’s unhealthy, and Randal says he knows. He thinks Randal should reevaluate the situation. Randal says Larry is judging him, but Larry says he’s just worried. He tells Larry to shut his ass up, and orders another drink. Larry says he’s driving, and Randal says he is too. He says he wants to sue Brad’s ass after he knocked him off the ladder. Larry says that’s easy stuff. He suggests they buy drinks for the couple he was talking with. They sit with them, and Larry introduces Randal. Weird.

Esperanza goes to Natalie’s house. Natalie asks what’s wrong. Esperanza doesn’t know what she’s going to do with Eddie. He just tore her house apart while he was fighting with Steven. She says Steven was helping her fix some bullet holes. Natalie is like, what? Esperanza explains how she shot at Eddie to get him out of the house. Of course he came back, and saw her and Steven having amazing sex. She doesn’t know how it happened. Natalie only focuses on the word amazing. Esperanza says Steven’s body is insane, he was there, and it’s been a long time. Natalie pours some wine. She keeps laughing, and Esperanza says it’s not that funny. Natalie asks if she likes him. Esperanza says she was angry with Eddie and he was there at the right time. He’s been flirting with her for months, and she’s been ignoring him. Natalie says she created a monster with Eddie. She asks what Steven says, and Esperanza tells her that she has to call him; she took advantage of him. Natalie says she doubts Steven feels that way. She asks if he was better than Eddie, and Esperanza says, much.

Lushion comes home, and Esperanza jets. Natalie wonders why Esperanza left when she saw Lushion. She says she knows about Esperanza and Steven, but Lushion says that’s not important right now. He needs to talk to Kelly. The gun was reported stolen two months ago, and this is going to be bad for her. It was reported stolen from Ramsay.

Next time, Lushion says the DA will be all over this, Steven checks on Esperanza, and Brad tells Eddie that he doesn’t understand love. One more episode before the season finale.

Below Deck

EJ says he doesn’t want the deck getting dirty from feet. He tells us one drunk Nico is bad, and now he has two – Nico and his brother. He says he needs to be the bigger person. In his interview, Nico calls him a d*ck, saying he’s holding back because EJ is his boss, but he still thinks he should be bosun. Brother Josh jets. EJ is at his wits end.

Kate goes over the supplies. EJ meets with the captain, who’s concerned about the weather. The worst thing you can have happen is not being able to get off the dock. EJ says he’s enjoyed working for him, and is appreciative to be here. He thinks there’s been an improvement, but his boat is arriving soon. He can only stay through the next charter. Captain Lee isn’t too sure Nico is up for the job, but he has to work with the cards he’s been dealt.

Time for the preference sheet meeting. Jason, the primary, is the CEO of a media company that works with outdoor advertising. His wife and some good friends are coming along. One of the friends is Eden Alpert, daughter of jazz musician Herb Alpert, and also a restaurant owner. They’re open to anything, and not picky, but want to be impressed. Jason is having a birthday, so a dinner is required, and they also want an 80s theme party. Kate asks about the weather, but the captain doesn’t know yet. They need a definite plan B.

Kate tells Jen the crew notices, and resents it, if she sneaks breaks. In her interview, Jen says the cleaning and laundry never ends; it’s a vicious cycle. Wait until she owns a house. The crew readies the boat. The captain confirms they’re not leaving the dock, and won’t be leaving anytime soon. Because of the wind and waves, they can’t use the water toys or tender either.

Nico calls for help out on the tender. He needs to go to the hospital now. Baker tells the captain that Nico hurt his arm. Nico says he hit his elbow, and now can’t move his fingers. The captain thinks it’s nerve damage. He tells us just when think it couldn’t get worse. He’s down a man, is losing a bosun, and the weather is a sh*t sandwich. Kate asks what’s going on, and Captain Lee says he sent Nico to the hospital to get checked out. EJ gives Baker some tasks, feeling awkward because he likes her and he’s her boss.

Nico comes back wearing a sling; he pinched a nerve. He tells the captain, and Captain Lee says he’s as useful as a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest. This reminds me of the time my sister worked as an insurance adjuster. They were swamped at the office, and a co-worker asked how she was doing. She said she was “as busy as a one-armed paperhanger,” and turned around to see it was a co-worker who only had one arm. He told her he was as busy as a one-armed insurance agent. BA-DUM-CHH! Captain Lee tells Nico to start his meds and get better.

The guests arrive. EJ wonders if Nico will make it through the charter. The captain does his welcome spiel, and says the wind is a problem, and due to safety issues, they can’t leave yet. He points out Nico’s sling, and says that was a direct result. In her interview, Kate says this means the interior will be doing all the work, while the deckhands relax. The guests immediately start complaining that it sucks, and one asks if they’ll be stuck tomorrow too. Captain Lee doesn’t know, and Kate gives the tour. Jason says it’s not the worst place to be stuck. It would be fine with me. I’d eat, drink, and be merry. Rinse and repeat.

Guest Charlie, who started the bitchfest, says they could have gotten hotel rooms and saved a load of money. Eden wants to see kitchen, and tells Matt to watch out, reminding him that she’s a restaurant owner. Grumpy Charlie asks if they can go out on deck, but mellows when he runs into Bruno. He tells Bruno that he has beautiful eyes and makes small talk. Kate says it’s a challenge, and Bruno tells her they’re complaining already. If they need anything, just communicate. In her interview, Kate thinks Bruno is confused, but if he wants to be a stew, he can start cleaning toilets.

Matt says it’s massive amount of pressure on the crew when they can’t get off the dock. They have to make the guests forget about being there. Kate says it’s hard to tell if the guests are nice or fake nice, since they’re from Los Angeles. EJ tells them that they can use the jet skis and hoverboards, and there are beaches around if they want to go. Bruno thinks the stews don’t have pride in what they’re doing, and he’ll show them how to do their job. Kate says he should think about going to the interior side.

The guests use the jet skis, and a picnic is prepared on the beach. Honestly, this would be a great vacation for me. Although I’d be happy with the hotel on the boardwalk here too. Kate wonders what’s taking so long, because no one said anything about a beach picnic; the deckhands just did it. Jen welcomes the guests back with drinks. Kate says guests always want the crew involved with theme parties, and if you have to wear a mustache or an afro, that’s what you do.

Jen tells Kate that Bruno is being bitchy, but Kate tells her to let him shine. The guests all dress up, but this looks more 60s to me. Pop Rocks are passed out, and an alternative use is suggested. I’m sure you can google it. It’s fish for dinner, and Eden whines about having fish more than once in one day. Kate says if she’d like something else, they can accommodate her, but she pouts and says she’s done with food anyway. Kate tells Matt enough fish. In his interview, he says unless it’s specific on the preference sheet, they should relax. He asks if he should make something else, and Kate says they’re happy with themselves and life, and don’t need more food right now.

Bri periodically checks on Nico. The guests eat something off of sticks, and do shots. They don’t fall out that late though, about 1:30. Geez, I stay up later on karaoke night. The captain visits Nico, and tells him nerves regenerate quickly. He sees Bri bringing Nico a dinner tray, and says he’ll smack his elbow to get treated like this.

Captain Lee asks if any guests want to tag along on a weather check. In his interview, he says he’s never spent an entire charter on deck. The charter guests always think they’re lying, so he wants to give them the ride of life. Two guys join him, and it’s pretty rough. The captain asks if they’ve seen enough, and they tell him yes; the jokes on them. In his interview, Captain Lee says a small apart of him was enjoying the hell out of it. Grumpy Charlie says he had a dream that he and Bruno got married, and lived in Portugal.

One of the guests who went with the captain tells them that the swells were nine feet felt, and they agree it’s unsafe. One of the women is waiting on a chai latte with soy milk. Jen is lollygagging in the kitchen, and Kate tells her to go now. She tells the guests she has some suggestions for the day. There’s a great place to go shopping on shore, and they’re close to a man-made reef where they can go exploring. It has fish and a sunken helicopter. Jen says Kate is stressing her out. In her interview, Kate says Jen was making the latte the way she does her hair. It took forever, an still looked like sh*t.

The captain calls Kate, EJ, and Matt to the bridge, and tells them to do whatever they can. Kate says they’re having a luau, and she’s ordered hula dancers. Captain Lee says how well they distract the guests can make a difference in the tip. Nico is pissed off and grumpy. He has no control over anything; it’s EJ’s deck. Kate tells the stews that when she gets back, they’ll discuss breaks. She leaves with the guests, one of them noting it’s Kate plus eight.

Matt has never done a luau, and isn’t himself right now. He feels like the world’s largest punching bag. The guests go to the reef, and do stuff underwater, while Kate serves drinks to the one woman who’s a party pooper. The reef is beyond cool. Kate texts the captain, asking if he’s ready for tonight, and he wonders what that means.

EJ explains to Baker that he’s going to be leaving, but asks her not to tell the others yet. She says it’s a bummer. Jen is having lunch in the crew mess. Bri radios her, but she keeps talking and eating. Bri finally goes to the mess, and asks if she can eat more and talk less. Jen whines that she’s entitled to eat the rest of her food, and Bri needs to shut up. Bri says she’s following Kates rules, and Jen accuses Bri of attacking her, when she did nothing of the kind. When they cross paths afterward, Jen says she has nothing to say to Bri.

Bruno helps Matt, making him a happy guy. They make a birthday cake. EJ wishes he had more time with Baker. He feels there are still chapters to be written. Please. The guests get back. Kate wonders what the stews were doing, since the laundry isn’t done and there are dishes in the sink. Bruno says there was some kind of tiff because one took a longer lunch than the other. Kate says apparently, they both took six hour lunches. She tells Bri about the laundry, and Bri says she’s mad at the wrong stew.

EJ thinks the deck crew has graduated to a higher level, and will be successful the rest of the season. Jen relays the dinner menu to the guests. Kate talks to her, and she acts like Bri was some kind of dictator who wouldn’t let her eat. Kate wants to know what happened the whole five hours. In her interview, she says Jen loves extra break time, and is competitive with Bri. She’s lying. Kate asks what time the captain is putting on his royal Hawaiian outfit. He says he’s not changing, and she says, yes he is. She got him an outfit. Bruno does some decorating. He wonders how the boat could be empty all day, and nothing done. Nico suggests he and Bri go to the hotel in town during their off-time. Kate asks Bri about what happened, and Bri says she felt she had to say something to Jen, but doesn’t think Jen ever came back from lunch.

Everyone gets dressed up for the luau in grass skirts and such. Jen rolls her eyes at whatever Bri says. Bri thinks her behavior in front of guests is unprofessional, and she plays the victim. Bruno says Charlie seems to have crush on him, and it’s fun to play along. He tells Matt that nothing has been set up outside. Kate asks Bruno how he feels, and he says the buffet looks terrible. She says he should tell the captain what he would do differently. He wants to know.

Bruno gets to the bridge and Captain Lee is in a whole get-up, with a floral headpiece, grass skirt, and a pineapple on the end of a staff. I guess he’s a Hawaiian chieftain. Bruno says he nailed it. In her interview, Kate remembers when she was green and knew everything. She was an idiot. Bri leads the guests upstairs, and Captain Lee tells them to be seated. He introduces himself as Don Ho’s brother, Ass. He does an entire riff, and says by the power invested in him by some nonsense, it’s officially Jason Swing Day, let the games begin. The hula dancers come out and do their thing. The captain says he’s outside his comfort zone, but contributing. If crew does it, he has to step up to the plate and sacrifice some dignity. Bruno admits Kate knows a lot, and he should be more humble. Captain Lee wants a raise.

Jen asks if she can have dinner, and Kate asks if she had lunch. Kate didn’t. Kate says she’s going to be the early girl, so Bri and Jen are going to do the clean-up work. She leaves written instructions so there’s no confusion. In her interview, she says she’s done all kinds of managing, and it’s time for good, old-fashioned shut-up and work. Jen complains that Kate has issues, and she hates life right now. She calls Kate a miserable, old bitch.

As Captain Lee would say, suck it up, buttercup.

Next time, Eden complains about the food, the captain is concerned about Bruno in the galley, the charter is a girlfriends’ trip, a new deckhand arrives, and Captain Lee’s wife, Maryann, visits.

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