Category Archives: Lisa Vanderpump

November 20, 2018 – In the Museum of Mayhem, Charter Chaos, Jenni’s Last Flip, nuTJ, Vanderpump Vogues & Be Prepared

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

We’re at the Port Charles Museum of Mayhem. Jordan is led in blindfolded. Anna promises no strippers. Curtis is led in from the other side, also blindfolded. He says the strippers better be worth it. The blindfolds are taken off and he tells Jordan he was just joking about the strippers. Anna says their wedding party consulted with each other, and it’s clear what they don’t want to do. They vetoed bars, strip clubs – Chase adds, and skydiving – all that was left was the escape room. I note nuTJ is among the group. Anna wanted to make it more competitive, so the bachelor and bachelorette teams will be in separate rooms. Nina says they were short a sleuth, so she brought a ringer – Peter.

Laura runs into not-Doc when she’s leaving Kelly’s. She warns him that he’s about to have to answer a lot of questions about what’s going on with him.

Stella thought she’d never see Marcus again. He says, it’s been long time. She tells him that she tried to find him on social media, but had no luck. It’s probably for the best. She wasn’t sure he’d want to see her after their last fight. He says, it was a doozie. But age gives wisdom. She had to do right by her sister and her boys, and if she’d stayed, he wouldn’t have met his wife. She says, it sounds like it worked out for the best. He asks, how are the boys she raised? She tells him, Curtis is getting married tomorrow, and he says, congratulations. She must be thrilled.

On the phone, Carly asks Spinelli to break into the Ferncliff server. She needs to get the name of the person in the room next to her. She thanks him, then sees Ava sitting in the lounge. Ava says, how nice to run into her. She hasn’t seen Carly since her horrible ordeal at The Floating Rib. Carly says Ava usually keeps a low profile around her. Why is tonight an exception? What’s gotten her so brazen? Ava says things are finally going her way.

A trail of clothing leads to Sasha’s bed. Kiki walks in, and says, oh my God. I find it hard to believe if they were hitting the sheets, there would be several pieces of clothing lying on top of the covers, but okay.

Jordan says her team is going to wipe the floor with Curtis’s team. The host, who is barely paying attention, telling someone on the phone that he’s not waiting when his shift is over, asks them for their phones. He takes Jordan’s team to a dark room. Lacking enthusiasm, he tells them that they’ve just learned Helena Cassadine has stolen the formula for carbonic snow. She plans to launch another Ice Age. They have an hour to foil the plan and notify the authorities. The lights come on, and there are figures of all the Cassadines and their cohorts. Cool!

The host tells Curtis’s team that they’ve been kidnapped by Ryan Chamberlain, and taken to an abandoned funhouse. There’s a gas leak, and they have one hour to escape Ryan’s same fate. There are figures of various killers from Port Charles, including Franco. Carnival music starts.

Griff wakes up. Kiki says she didn’t want to believe it. She thought Franco must be wrong, and saw Sasha with someone else. He sees her, and jumps out of bed. He looks down, and realizes he’s naked. He says, this isn’t what it looks like, and Kiki tells him to stay away from her. He pulls on his pants, and goes after her. Sasha looks around for a moment, and goes back to sleep

Carly tells Ava most people would be traumatized to discover a headless body in their place of business. Either she’s immune to death, no matter how grisly, or she had something to do with it. Ava says she’s been cleared; Carly can’t pin it on it her. Carly says she can make Ava leave the premises. She tells Ava to get out or she’ll have security take her out the back way, near the dumpster, where she belongs.

Laura tells not-Doc, for the sake of her campaign, she had to release a statement about their separation. Reporters will want his side. He says he’ll tell them that they’ve grown apart. She asks if that’s what he thinks happened. He says they’ve been through this; she left town – Laura interrupts, noticing he took his ring off already.

On Jordan’s Team, Molly says, the best way to win is look for hidden clues; keys in drawers or papers can lead to the first clue. Alexis looks at Jerry Jax, and says she fails to understand why this generation thinks is fun. In the other room, Finn startles Sam, who tells him Diego Alcazar sent threatening text messages before he took his victim’s lives. TJ says Ryan was one sick puppy. Chase sees a “C” on Ryan’s knife. He doesn’t remember Lulu saying anything about that in her articles.

Not-Doc asks Laura, why wear his ring? Laura says the marriage isn’t over yet; they’re separated, not divorced. It’s a sign he’s moving on. Why is he so ready to let the marriage go? Why can’t they talk? Where is the man she fell in love with? He says he’s not the same man he was when she left for a year. She says, message received. He starts to go into Kelly’s, and stops. He says, Ava? Ava shows herself, and he says he’s surprised she’s still out and about. She tells him that she didn’t need the pills after all. She’s going to sleep like a baby tonight. She just knows it.

At the MetroCourt bar, Kiki orders vodka straight up. Griff runs in, and she asks him, please, stay away. He doesn’t know how to explain, and she says, it’s pretty straightforward. He says Sasha wanted to apologize, and called him; he can prove it. The message is gone, but he says he’s not lying. He wouldn’t cheat on her. She says he didn’t have a problem cheating on her mom.

Sam tells Peter that Heather Webber terrorized her, just like Franco. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree – or should she say severed branch? Nina says, Peter is not Faison. Sam says, he’s responsible for keeping Jason prisoner for five years.  Peter thinks, for Curtis’s sake, it’s probably best if he leaves, but the exit door is locked.

Anna looks at the figure of Faison. Jordan thinks maybe this was a bad idea. The Floating Rib is calling their names. She asks who’s up for a margarita, and everyone is in, but the exit door is locked.

Peter says the exit is locked. He yells, saying he wants the hell out of there. Jordan says they’re breaking several fire codes. Molly says, the host is supposed to monitor the game at all times. Where is he? Asleep at his desk, wearing headphones, while they gesture at the cameras. A cleaning person comes through his office, but he doesn’t wake up. Finn says, and he seemed to have such a strong work ethic. Molly overheard him telling someone that he wasn’t going to wait. He was leaving at the end of his shift. They’re locked in.

Sam says they’re locked in, and the host took their phones. Curtis says they’re trapped in there for the night. Jordan says she can’t be locked in; she’s getting married tomorrow. TJ says there can’t just be one way out. Molly says they have to beat the game in time.

Maxie says they came to play the game, solve the puzzle, and enjoy the look on the guys’ faces when they beat them.

Finn finds what looks like an old wooden box, and gives it to Chase, saying it’s locked. Chase reads the bottom, which says, property of MOCA. He wonders what that is.

Maxie sees a gum wrapper, and wonders if it’s a clue. Lulu says she’s avoiding the question about her and Peter. Maxie says they have a lot of time if they’re stuck. Lulu says, it can’t happen; face your fears. She looks at the figure of Stavros, and finds a chess piece; a queen. Jordan looks around, and finds a small chest near Jerry Jax. It has a combination lock; four numbers. Anna asks if there’s a book by PK Sinclair in the bookcase. Molly finds Daughter of Eternity. Anna bets their first clue is in there.

Griff tells Kiki that she has to listen. He wouldn’t do that to her. Laura wonders what’s going on. Carly doesn’t know, but she’s going to have to ask them to leave if it doesn’t stop. Laura says, trouble in paradise? It’s going around. She starts to cry, and says her marriage is falling apart.

Kiki says she fell into this. If you cheat with someone, you’ll cheat on them. Griff says he only remembers walking into the room. He makes her feel the lump on his head, and she asks if things got crazy in bed. He asks, what if someone is trying to set them up?

Not-Doc tells Ava that she seems content. She says Kiki is going to realize what kind of man Griff is, and it’s only a matter of time before her daughter comes back to her. She thanks him for encouraging her to go after what she wants. Is he taking his own advice?

Stella tells Marcus that she’s happy Curtis is happy. He says that’s all they can ask. He wonders what about Tommy, and she says unfortunately, he passed away in Iraq. He asks how it happened, and she tells him, a friendly fire incident. She thinks of how alone he must have felt when he died. Marcus says, more than anything, you want someone to blame.

Some pages are marked in the PK Sinclair book. Jordan says they’re the combination to the lock. They open the box.

Sam thinks MOCA is the Museum of Contemporary Art. Franco had a show there, and staged it to look like Jason pushed him off the roof. Nina suggests something I don’t catch, and Curtis says the lock has letters and numbers like a phone. He tries a combination, and it opens.

Sam looks in the box, and takes out a black light. Chase says they’re used to find out how nasty hotel rooms are. Finn says, hit the lights. Curtis goes around the room with it. On the floor, he sees 716 555 0103. Nina says the host took their phones. Peter asks if anyone sees a phone.

Jordan finds a floppy disk, and they decide it must be clue for later. They keep looking. Alexis touches the Helena figure, and says, much warmer than the real thing. She shows Helena the watch, and says, mine. Looking at a brooch on Helena’s jacket, she finds a note. Molly says it’s a configuration for a chess game.

In Sasha’s hotel room, Griff asks if she remembers him showing up. She says, no, and she doesn’t remember sending him a text either. He says she has oversized pupils, one of the telltale signs of being drugged. Kiki bets she knows who did it.

Ava tells not-Doc that she saw him and Laura together, and thought they might be reconciling. Not-Doc says she’s a perceptive woman, but that’s not the case. They’re going public with the divorce. It’s for the best for many reasons.

Laura says she never should have dumped on Carly. Carly says she’s been there. Sometimes you need to talk about it to work through it. Laura says she never knew. Even in France they seemed in sync. When she came home, there was a weird distance between them. At first, she chalked it up to the anniversary of Ryan’s crimes, but now she doesn’t know. Carly thinks he has been acting strange. At the harvest festival, he snapped at her when she asked about the patient next to her in Ferncliff.

Sam finds a phone. Finn says, call someone. Sam says it doesn’t work, but she can text. Diego texted messages. She texts the number from the floor, and a combination pops up on the screen. TJ asks, what that’s supposed to mean?

Molly and Valerie play chess. Anna says there’s a missing peace. Lulu brings out the queen she found. When they place it on the board, they hear something open.

Peter, for reasons that weren’t said or I missed, says, turns the lazy Susan on a nearby table. Something unlocks. Chase says it came from the clown picture. They go over to this giant clown face, and slide it over. It opens into another room.

Maxie asks, what’s that, and Valerie says, the lock on the bookcase. She slides it over, and it opens to another room.

Curtis says Peter can crash his bachelor party any time. The others can get out.

Jordan’s group walks into a small office with a desk, computer, and wall clock. There’s a clock, and Maxie says they only have six minutes to get out. Jordan tries another door, but it’s locked too. Molly wonders if the computer can unlock the door. It has a floppy drive, so they put the disk in. It tells them, let the clues be the key to the password. It will unlock the door. If they don’t get it in three tries, the game is over. Whatever that means.

There’s a keyboard where Curtis’s group is. Peter asks if anyone knows how to play piano. Sam reads the combination, and they realize it’s notes. Nina thinks if they play it, it will unlock the door.

Carly tells Laura that she knows who’s currently in the room; Nelle. She doesn’t know for how long, but she was not the man howling next door when she was there. Laura asks why his identify is so important. Carly doesn’t know, but if there’s one person at Ferncliff who shouldn’t be there, she has to find out. She’s not giving up until she has answers.

Ava tells not-Doc, it’s a shame when a marriage has to end. Kiki flies up, and tries to smack her, but Ava grabs her arm. Kiki says she knows Ava drugged Sasha, and knocked Griff over the head to make it look like they slept together.

Marcus tells Stella that he felt angry when his wife was diagnosed. She says it’s hard to make peace with Tommy being killed. Marcus says he realized being angry wasn’t getting him anywhere. It was distracting him from precious time he could have spent with his wife. Since then, he’s spent time with her, and told her things he wanted her to hear, and it helped, but he’ll always regret the time he wasted.

Curtis plays something on the keyboard, but nothing happens.

The password is eleven letters. Jordan types in escaperoom, but that isn’t it. Anna says it has to do with the game, and Jordan tries portcharles, but is denied access again. Maxie says they have two minutes.

Nina asks Curtis if he’s sure he’s playing it right. Chase asks if there are any clues they haven’t used yet.

Anna says the prompt didn’t say it had something to do with the game, but specifically, the clues. They go over them, and put them together. Jordan types in iceprincess. At the same time, TJ figures out that the “C” on the knife means C sharp. Curtis plays again. Both solutions work, and they all get out.

Stella tells Marcus it sounds like he had a wonderful marriage. He says for every happy memory, he has a regret about a fight. When he found out his mother-in-law was coming to live with them, he didn’t speak to his wife for two days. It seems silly. What he’s learned is, anger can make you feel better sometimes, but forgiveness gives life. Anger only gives you more anger. He has to get back, and they hug. He’s glad to see her happy. When he’s gone, she ponders.

The bachelor and bachelorette groups meet back where they started. Jordan says they won. Confetti falls. Everyone cheers.

Griff tells Sasha keep drinking to flush the drugs out. Sasha asks if he thinks she was roofied. She didn’t have a drink. She ordered room service. She wonders why someone would want to drug her. Griff has a good idea

Ava asks not-Doc if she and Kiki can privately discuss this misunderstanding, and he steps away. She tells Kiki that she has no idea why she’s upset. Kiki says Franco told her someone she cared about saw Griff and Sasha together. She knows it was Ava. Ava asks if something happened, and Kiki says she knows it did. She drugged Sasha. She didn’t learn a thing after what happened with Morgan. She hit Griff in the head. What if he had brain bleed or was dead? She uses people as weapons, and tried using them to hurt her. Ava says she did it for her. She knows Griff will hurt her. Kiki tells Ava not to claim she did it for her. Ava can’t stand to see her happy. She has a weird competitive streak with Kiki about younger men. And when she’s hurt, she wants to make the world hurt as much as she did. When she was growing up, Ava let her do whatever she wanted, and she thought she had the coolest mom. But Ava really didn’t know how to be one. Maybe she didn’t want to. Kiki knows who she is now. Ava says, that’s not true. Kiki says every time she forgives Ava, and lets her back in her life, Ava hurts her in a new way. If Griff and Sasha want to go to the police, she won’t hesitate to back up their story. She leaves, and not-Doc comes back. He stands behind Ava, looking at his phone, but says nothing.

Laura says there might be a place in her administration for Carly. Carly says her temper is too short, and there are too many skeletons in her closet, even for a politician. She has to take a call, but makes Laura promise that she’ll reach out if she needs anything. When Laura is gone, Carly asks Spinelli if he has anything for her. A name?

Maxie is glad they’re not in that room anymore. Lulu says when she was looking at Ryan, she though how weird it was that someone so evil shared a face with someone so kind. She tells Maxie, he went by the name of Todd Wilson. Maxie says, a psycho by any other name is still a psycho.

Not- Doc steps away from where Ava is. On the phone, he says, the patient is agitated? Up his medication; it’s the only option. Another thirty milligrams. It will keep him calm. He knows Mrs Wilson needs to be calm.

Carly gets a pen, and thanks Spinelli. She writes down the name Wilson.

Tomorrow, Spencer asks if Valentin is threatening him, Sam tells Jason to leave, and Laura wants the truth from not-Doc.

Below Deck

Captain Lee tells Chandler this is about as effed up a deck crew as he’s seen. It’s beyond embarrassment. How can they load up a boat with supplies, and drop the guests off without them. It’s rudimentary Deckhand 101. Chandler’s crew is on him, and his excuses are silly. He’s not doing his job, and if the captain has to solve his problems, what does he need Chandler for? In his interview, Captain Lee says instead of just apologizing, Chandler is looking to make excuses. It’s a screw up. He tells Chandler that he’s excused.

Kate tells Josiah that the captain is pissed. A kid is wandering around, and Josiah juggles handling the drinks, and getting the kid back to where she belongs.

Adrian says he never had a whole table tell him the food was bad. Tonight, he’s blowing them out of the water. Kate tells Captain Lee that it’s the rock star party tonight, and he’s joining the guests for dinner. He tells her that his bosun is dropping the ball. In her interview, Kate says when the deck crew doesn’t do their job well, the interior tries compensate, so they still get a good tip, but it would be nice if everyone would do their jobs.

Ashton tells Chandler, if they’re all on the same page, they don’t need to know what do. Ross adds that they’ll make fewer mistakes. Chandler says, no one knew what was going on, and Ashton says that’s what needs to be addressed. Chandler thinks they need to dial that sh*t in; they’re on the fourth charter. There are always going to be surprises. The captain tells Kate, it’s one more fubar, and she says they’re almost at the end. In her interview, Rhylee says there’s no reason for Chandler’s attitude or mistakes. If it was her boat, she would have fired him.

Adrian is done with Caroline. He’s staying professional, but he’s working twenty-hour days, and she has so many problems. He can’t take it.

The guests get rock starred up. The captain joins them. Adrian says he’s doing the best he can, and hopes they enjoy it. The stuffed mushrooms get approval. Kate tells Adrian, they’re so happy. She’s not just saying that. He accompanies the pork tenderloin with cognac braised apples, and tells them, enjoy. Albert says, the food is excellent tonight.

Rhylee tells Ross that she finished blading the deck, and everything is put away. She appreciates him and Ashton speaking up. In his interview, Ross says he tries to respect Chandler, but it was a sh*t show today. One of the little kids asks Captain Lee if he knows how to make a tissue dance. He asks how, and she says, put a boogie in it. The captain laughs like he didn’t fall off his dinosaur the first time he heard that. Most of the crew goes to bed. Josiah calls home, saying the kids remind him of his niece. He loves being an uncle, but it’s hard being away when she’s growing up.

Chandler is dreading the day. His dad has a calm, collected style that he learned and likes to mirror. More like dazed and confused. The captain explains where they’re going. Chandler says they have no time to waste. The captain says dinner is at 5:30. They’re taking the pig out first, and will have to make several runs. He wants it to go smoothly.

In the morning, the guests ask for juice. Caroline asks Adrian if they have any in a box. That’s a no, so she has to squeeze oranges. In her interview, she says a group of ten is a lot for one stew. A guest says their Bloody Mary is terrible. Been there. Never order one of those at Friday’s.

Kate says if Caroline can’t handle coffee and croissant platters, they’re in trouble, and comes to Caroline’s rescue. Anchor is up and they’re on their way. Kate asks Caroline what she put in the drink; they want another one. In Kate’s interview, she says, Caroline’s foot is healed, but the bad news is, she’s still Caroline. Kate can cover for her, but Caroline is repeatedly telling Kate that she can’t do her job. This is about work, and she’s not doing it.

Chandler confers with Adrian, who says he’s roasting the pig on the boat. Chandler says he’ll get the beach stuff loaded. In his interview, he says he wants to be liked by his team, but wants the boat to be successful as well. He tells the deck crew that he wants everything the guests might want to do on board and on the beach. They need to make up for yesterday. Kate tells Josiah that Caroline couldn’t even handle a full breakfast. She’s almost getting worse. In his interview, Josiah says Caroline is like his Great Aunt May when she went through menopause. Just chill out.

A dolphin! Kate calls for local dancers and musicians. Chandler calls the captain about some petty thing, and Adrian is like, omg, figure it out. Kate tells Josiah, the hierarchy of safety is, safety, charter guests, captain, crew, and they make up a dance to that. Kate wishes Chandler would take it down a notch. She knows he’s walking on eggshells, but it’s a struggle for her not to put him in his place. Adrian explains that he’s cooking the pig at the boat, and finishing it on the beach. The guests will never know.

Caroline calls Kate, who asks her to organize the laundry room. Chandler tells Rhylee that he doesn’t want any more wet towels on the deck; use her eyes. She tells him to stop being condescending, and he says – wait for it – no back talk. He tells her to stop yelling, and she says she’ll yell, so he can tell the difference. I laugh, since I’ve said that. She tells him if he speaks to her condescendingly one more time, she’s taking it to the captain. In his interview, he says, don’t talk about it; just go to the captain. He tells her not to tell him how to do his job, and they’ll be fine. She needs to open her eyes. She tells him to speak to her with respect, and he says as soon as he gets it. She asks, where is his accountability?

Chandler asks the captain if it’s okay to go over to the beach, and Captain Lee reminds him to leave someone there. Ashton and Rhylee stay on board. Kate asks Josiah to stay on guest service, and she’ll pack. Chandler tells Ross they’ll be fine, but in his interview, Ross thinks it’s a difficult reef. It’s super shallow. He has confidence in his capability, but this is another level. He and Chandler take the supplies over. In Chandler’s interview, he says it’s a huge beach set up, and there can be no mistakes.

At the boat, the guests are using the slide. A little girl says, no sea vegetables allowed, which strikes me funny. Ross thinks the rescue tender can be used in shallow water during the day, but not at night. He tells the captain that he’ll explain when he gets back. On the yacht, he shows Captain Lee a shallow reef on the monitor, and says he’s not that confident about it. The captain says dinner is at five, the dancers are doing a twenty minute show; at that point, bring everyone back.

The captain radios that they’re sending the guests out at five. Ooh. It’s a tree coming out of the water, with birds sitting on it, in silhouette. Where’s my camera? Oh wait. I’m not there. <sob!> Captain Lee says he can’t have those guys out at night. They’ll sink one of the effing boats. He tells them, get going. He doesn’t like the way this is shaping up. He has to instruct Chandler on driving the boat, and says he shouldn’t have to tell anyone that.

Musicians play, mostly drums, as the guests arrive at the beach. The captain calls Ross, telling him, not after dark, even if he has to cut it short. The guests will have to live with it. He’d rather have that than someone getting hurt. Uh-oh. A guest is down.

Ashton and Chandler are literally carrying the female guests from the boat to the beach. There’s a shale walkway, and somehow, the guest Chandler is helping slips, or he slips, or something. In his interview, Ashton says, not only is Chandler dropping the ball, he’s dropping the guests. HA-HA-HA! Rhylee asks if the captain thinks the guests had a good time, and he says he wouldn’t know. He was too busy putting fires out. He radios Chandler, and tells him that they’re going with Plan B. Let the guests enjoy their time, and everyone else heads back. They’ll send a van to pick up the guests. It’s way too dangerous via boat. They’ll pick them up in the tender where it’s safer.

Chandler tells Rhylee about drying something somewhere, and she says she didn’t know they were doing that. he says, it’s common sense, and she says maybe she doesn’t have any. She’s over it. She’s done taking it from him. Ross tells her, just go in. He thanks her for working hard, and tells Chandler that he let her have a break. Chandler tells Ross to deal with her; he’s done. On the beach, the guests give compliments to the chef. He nailed it.

Kate calls for the taxi. The captain says he still has to assume everything was executed properly. It’s dark out now, and Chandler’s not around. Finally, Chandler radios, saying they’re coming in. Captain Lee tells Caroline to have drinks waiting when the guests get back. Kate gets the guests in a taxi, and while she and Josiah aren’t looking, a dog roots through one of their bags. The captain takes a picture of the Tahitian moon. He tells Chandler that Rhylee did a good job putting away the jet skis. Chandler must be boiling. Ha-ha!

The captain apologizes to the guests about the inconvenience, but it was in the interest of safety. Caroline manages to get some glasses of champagne on a tray, but then drops one. The injured guest says she got dropped, and Captain Lee says that means she was carried, and not successfully. He tells them champagne is waiting. Caroline radios about the broken glass, but not before Master Pearson steps on a piece and starts wailing his head off. The captain is like, wtf is going on? Caroline is like, f*ck! Pearson’s mom tells him it’s a battle wound, and the captain says he doesn’t even have one of those. He and Pearson fist bump. In his interview, the captain says, it’s a clusterf*ck.

Josiah and Kate clean up. Kate tells Josiah not to chop his fingers off folding the chairs; she can’t lose him. In her interview, she says once again, she and Josiah are doing all the work. There’s no reason why not one deck team member is helping. Josiah says, welcome to yachting. Albert makes the drinks. Caroline keeps apologizing. Captain Lee tells her to take care of the guests. Just get them what they need and relax. Chandler will clean up. She asks Pearson if they’re good, and he’s already forgotten about it.

In Caroline’s interview, she says she already felt like an a-hole. Knowing Pearson cut his foot on a glass she dropped makes her feel terrible. She gives Albert bandages. The guests need tequila stat. Kate is starving, exhausted, and angry. A guest tells Caroline that she’s not the best at mixed drinks. Kate comes to the rescue again. The dropped guest tells Rhylee that Chandler dropped her, and didn’t even apologize. Josiah gives her a cold compress. Kate says, it’s nuts, but she’ll just keep making drinks. Flesh wounds are not five star. In Caroline’s interview, she says, at this point, she’s overwhelmed and miserable.

The dropped guest complains to Chandler that he didn’t say sorry. He tells her, sorry; it was a hectic morning. Wow. He does have a problem with apologizing. She says Albert bandaged her. The captain watches all this. Caroline does laundry. Kate tells Captain Lee, it’s chaos. Guests are bleeding, there are dishes to be done, and drinks need to be made; she’s carrying towels back from the beach party in the dark. Something needs to happen. The captain tells her to keep the deck crew until she doesn’t need them. She tells Chandler to wash dishes. He says he’ll take a please. He’s the worst.

Ashton folds laundry. He thinks it’s fun. Caroline asks if he’s bad at science and driving. Kate asks for something from the beach club. Ross says he’ll do it. Kate asks who was on earliest, and tells them to knock off. In his interview, Ashton says, Kate taking charge is refreshing. Someone is taking charge.

Chandler is messing around in the galley, and Kate asks if he’s making dinner. She hasn’t eaten. He says he’s having ice cream, and she’s like, no, you’re not done. She tells him to put away the leftovers, and asks if any towels are out. She puts the ice cream back, and he whines that he was letting it thaw. She tells him worry about work first, and he asks why she’s trying to boss him. The captain is his boss. She asks if he didn’t hear the captain on the radio. He says he’s getting things done and will eat his ice cream as he wishes. This dude needs a smack in the face. She says it’s not happening yet, and he tells her Rhylee can finish. She knows he loves to delegate, but he’s a big boy, and he’ll get his ice cream. He says that’s the second time she’s disrespected him, and she says it’s past the second time. In Chandler’s interview, he says he busted his ass all day, and she’s a glorified housekeeper. I gasp out loud. Kate tells Chandler if he can’t understand the captain’s decision, she can’t help him. He says everyone was working hard. He mumbles that she’s disrespectful. In his interview, Captain Lee says he expected more. If it was just one thing, it wouldn’t be so bad, but there are so many. We flash back to all of those. He says they still have the rest of the season. How much is he willing to jeopardize or how much is he willing to bet Chandler will make a turn around? Chandler sits eating ice cream.

Ashton says he should have carried the guest. Aiden makes gluten-free chocolate muffins. Gluten-free sounds unappetizing, but they look delicious. Caroline says, it’s a bad day to be a deckhand. The anchor is up, and they’re moving. The way the kids are eating the muffins proves they’re good.

It’s time to say goodbye. Albert says it was the coolest vacation they’ve ever had. Torrie says she doesn’t want to leave. In his interview, Chandler says he’s ready for it to be over. This is the worst charter he’s ever done in his life. Albert says, in general, they had a great trip. Mistakes were made, but they all make mistakes. They really, truly appreciate it. It looks like a fat envelope. Kate says, cutest family ever. The captain says, let’s knock the soul out of this bitch. Kate wonders why he was looking at her when he said it.

Chandler knows he’s about to get his ass handed to him, and he’s terrified. I’m delighted. Captain Lee tells them, be in the crew mess in fifteen.

Captain Lee doesn’t know where to start. It was just horrendous. There were a lot of things they did wrong. The managed to award two purple hearts, one to kid; a first for him. They got $20K, but the captain thinks they left five on the table they would have gotten if they performed better. Tomorrow is another day. Kate thinks they tipped because they didn’t die. Rhylee is annoyed that the captain didn’t point out that the major problem is Chandler. I’d say Caroline is a close second.

The captain calls Kate to the wheelhouse. She doesn’t know why she’s being called, but she can tell he’s not happy about something. Captain Lee says he needs her to be witness. Kate says, not good. The captain radios Chandler, and tells him to have a seat. He thinks the time has come for them to have the chat he’s been putting off.

Next time, waterfalls, the primary is a charter broker and yacht salesman, Caroline accuses Kate of being abusive. Rhylee is sick of everyone. and someone needs to get off the boat in an hour. I can only hope it’s Chandler.

😵 Tonight was the Flipping Out season finale where Jeff and Jenni had their big fight. I hadn’t known he basically fired her. Long story short, she said she’d passed up a serious chance at a Nicholas Cage film, because the filming schedule would have interfered with her job as Jeff’s assistant. He called her a liar, saying there was no such opportunity, and she cried over him always squelching her dreams. He told her to take a week off, and then they met to talk. As he was talking, and saying he realized that he really was standing in her way, both she and I realized he was telling her goodbye. I thought he was being sneaky and phony in the way he did it, but I’m hoping to be proved wrong, and that he’s right in the long run.

🙋 Meet the New TJ…

Not sure what happened to the old one.

https://www.abc.soapsindepth.com/posts/general-hospital-tajh-bellow-jt-ashford-168503

🍸 Vanderpump Rules Vogue…

Giggy!

https://www.vogue.com/projects/13547011/babes-in-pump-land-vanderpump-rules-bravo/

🍗 In Preparation…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

November 15, 2018 – Jordan Consults with Not-Doc, the Shahs Reunite, Why God Why & Important

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Curtis says Hayden’s letter came in yesterday’s mail. It’s been ages since he’s heard from her. Finn asks how she is.

At the MetroCourt, Drew tells someone on the phone they’ll talk soon. Margaux hears him, and says, spontaneous, yet planned. Who’s the lucky lady? She tells him they don’t need to be enemies just because he turned down her proposal. He asks if she means her blackmail; exchanging his memories for the drop on Sonny. How’s that working for her? She says, since he asked, it blew up in her face.

Willow tells Elizabeth the kids are at an assembly, so they’ll have time to talk. Elizabeth says Aiden tried to bring his Halloween mask with him to school (!), and if it’s about him being tardy, it’s her fault. Willow says he only missed the Pledge; it’s not about that. Elizabeth asks if something happened. Willow says she encouraged him to ask a question on Career Day, but he didn’t respond; he just stayed quiet. Elizabeth says he’s still shutting down and retreating into himself. Willow tells her it’s become more pronounced, and she thinks she knows the cause.

Franco sees not-Doc at the hospital, and tries talking to him. He snaps at Franco, asking what’s not clear about him being busy. He apologizes, saying he’s on edge. The PCPD wants him to come in. Franco says it’s probably for the same reason they wanted to talk to him. It’s about the trick-or-treat murder at The Floating Rib.

Carly’s not thrilled about being person of interest, but it’s a step up from being a suspect. Sonny is sorry he wasn’t there for her last night, but she says Diane handled it. She was just worried about him. In the past, when he fell off the radar, it meant trouble. He says, not this time. The DA has been neutralized. At least as far as the murder goes. Jordan calls them in, and Carly says this is the second time in 24-hours; Jordan must have missed her. Jordan tells them to have a seat, but Sonny says if she’s asking questions, they’ll need their lawyer. Jordan says, no questions. She has definitive evidence in the murder of Mary Pat.

Anna says she has calls to make, but Finn says she doesn’t have leave. The letter is none of his business. Curtis says Hayden was straightforward. She saw a post by a mutual friend about his wedding, and wanted to congratulate him. She wrote about her travels and freelance work, but it sounded like she doesn’t stay in one place very long. Finn asks if she’s well, and Curtis says, she’s still figuring stuff out, and hopes Finn finds what he’s looking for. There was a note inside for him marked private. He didn’t read it. He gives Finn the note and leaves.

Margaux says Drew must have heard the old saying, be careful what you wish for. She should have paid attention to the warning. She wanted to know why her father died. Now she knows. Drew says, okay… She says her mother was having an affair with Skully, and had him murder her father. Drew says, sorry; it’s a lot to handle. She still believes Sonny pulled the trigger. She can’t prove it, but a case against her mom is possible. Drew says Margaux would have to turn her in first. She asks if it isn’t her duty. Of all people, who would know better than a Navy SEAL about putting duty and loyalty above all else, including your own life. He doesn’t remember though, does he?

Elizabeth tells Willow that at home, Aiden is talkative, engaging, and always present. Then when it’s time for school, a shift happens. Whatever is troubling him, is happening there. Willow says there’s nothing wrong with him, but there’s definitely a major problem at school. She believes he’s being targeted by a bully.

Franco tells not-Doc that Jordan came by the house to talk to him about the murder. Not-Doc wonders why. He wasn’t there, was he? Franco says he and not-Doc saw each other at the hospital that night. Not-Doc says, of course. Things go blurry after talking about Mary Pat. Franco says he and Mary Pat didn’t really have much contact, but what they really wanted know, were the methods and motivation of  a real-life alleged psycho killer. Not-Doc asks what he told them, and Franco says he told them to talk to not-Doc. He’s the expert. His recent research is all about killers. Not-Doc says that makes sense; anything else? Franco says he told them he thought not-Doc would be privy to what was driving the killer at the time. He was uncomfortable because Elizabeth was there. The thing is, he knows he’s fooling himself. Not-Doc asks, how so? and Franco says he understands the killer more than he was willing to admit. He knows enough to put him away for good.

Jordan says they know Carly was somewhere else well past the window of time. Carly tells Jordan she already said that, and Jordan says it’s to both their benefits to confirm it, especially since they found strands of Carly’s hair. Sonny wants to be clear, and asks if she’s no longer a person of interest. Jordan says she isn’t, and Carly wonders who’s trying set her up.

Elizabeth says, Aiden is being bullied? and Willow says she’s afraid so. Elizabeth says that explains why it’s been so difficult getting him on the bus. He must dread it. Willow hates that it’s happening there. She wants to make it welcoming and safe for all of the students. She likes to see the best in all of them, and must have missed the warning signs. She apologizes, but Elizabeth says at least their on the same page now. She asks if Aiden has been physical hurt, but Willow has seen no evidence of physical abuse. She spoke with other teachers, and neither have they. Children of that age primarily engage in verbal and social abuse; name calling, teasing, spreading rumors. Elizabeth says, you don’t have to get hit to be hurt. Verbal and emotional abuse can cut as deep, and last longer.

Not-Doc asks why Franco thinks he could catch the killer. Franco says he understands them. He can put himself in their place; right into his head. He can absolutely help track the killer down before he hurts anyone else. Not-Doc says he’s well-intentioned, but it would be a catastrophic idea. He’s already dealt with darkness, and is able to control it. It would be a mistake to access it again. He might open impulses that he may or may not be able to control. His top priority is Franco’s mental health, and it’s not worth the risk. They’ve come so far together, and he’s proud of the life Franco has built. Don’t jeopardize that now. Franco says, when he puts it like that… Not-Doc says he’s sure he can provide whatever insights are needed. Franco thanks him. Talking to not-Doc always makes him feel better. Elizabeth calls Franco, and asks him to meet her at the school. She’d rather tell him what’s up in person. He says he’s on the way.

In his hotel room, Finn tells Anna that Hayden was always unpredictable. She had a lot of secrets and demons. Their relationship was destined to fail. Anna says he wanted it to work, and he says he did. When Hayden got pregnant, it changed everything. Anna says it didn’t give him the impulse to leave. Finn says, he was all in. Although after the kids yesterday, he’s not so sure. Anna thinks he would have made a good dad. Finn says he has a great life. There’s nothing missing. He has her, and he thinks he has Roxie. Anna says she’s not threatened. He treasures what he has. Anna thinks he should read Hayden’s note. If he doesn’t, he’ll always wonder.

Drew asks if Margaux enjoys making light of his situation. That was low, even for her. She says she’s just reminding him that his memories are waiting. It’s really a shame to throw away the past. Drew says he doesn’t care. She needs a new angle; the flashdrive isn’t working for her. She says there’s no statute of limitations on murder.

Curtis comes in, and says he got Drew’s message. He asks if everything is okay.

Jordan tells Sonny and Carly that they’ll get to the bottom this. Sonny says Carly has been nothing but cooperative, and she’s owed a straight answer. Is she in danger? Jordan tells him to take whatever measures he deems appropriate to protect his family. It can’t hurt to tighten security. Carly says they’re always under investigation, and now that there’s an outside threat, a psycho killer, they’re supposed to step up security? Jordan says she’s using the best people they have. The killer won’t get away with what they’ve done. She promises. Not-Doc arrives.

Jordan thanks him for coming. She’s counting on his expertise regarding the incident at The Floating Rib. He asks for a moment with Carly first, and asks how she’s holding up. It must have been shocking and disturbing. She says it was, and someone tried to burn her for the murder. He wonders who would do such a thing, and to what end? Sonny says they failed, and will get theirs in the end. Carly says her neighbor at Ferncliff was no longer in the room. Nelle had taken his place. She wonders how Nelle ended up there, and Sonny says, later. They need to find out who’s behind the murder first. Not-Doc says he’s there to help.

Drew goes to the bar with Curtis. Curtis was hoping it was good news about Oscar, but Drew says, not today. He apologizes for not being able to make the wedding, but Curtis says he’s focusing on his son, as he should be. Drew says Curtis never did say where they were going on their honeymoon. Curtis says they’re putting the wedding together be the skin of their teeth; they have no plans. Drew says they might have now.

Franco storms into the classroom, saying, what the hell? and Elizabeth tells him being irate won’t solve the problem. Willow understands it’s difficult to hear. Franco says Aiden is a good kid. Willow sees that, and say that’s why he might be a target. His schoolwork isn’t suffering, but he’s self-secluding. Franco thinks she needs to tell his classmates, but Willow says he already feels isolated. It will just draw further attention to him, and he’ll feel singled out. Franco says the bully should be punished to set an example, but Willow thinks that will just make it worse. Elizabeth says, instead of one bully, Aiden will have to deal with a whole classful. Franco wants to know who the parents are. He’ll put a stop to it. Willow says she can’t do that.

Anna tells Finn she’ll give him space to read in private, but he says there shouldn’t be secrets between them. He opens it. If you’re reading this, you know I reached out to Curtis. I’m still trying to sort things out, what used to be called finding myself, whoever the hell that turns out to be. I’m sorry for running away. I should have trusted you; trusted us. Anna says, keep reading. After my travels, I’ve come full circle; remember what we had and what I let slip away. He crumples it. Anna says it’s eloquent, filled with genuine emotion and honesty. What did she say in the part he didn’t read out loud?

At the MetroCourt, Carly doesn’t understand why the mystery about her neighbor at Ferncliff. Sonny says the doctor is looking out for his patient’s right to privacy. Carly wonders why he wouldn’t tell her that, and Sonny says they should do what they came to do – celebrate being free of Mary Pat. Carly says, celebrate being clear with Margaux. Sonny regrets that it went that far; he was rough on her, but she didn’t back off and paid the price. Carly says, speak of the devil.

Carly says she’s not going to feel unwelcome in her own hotel. She asks Margaux if no good deed goes unpunished under her watch. Margaux has no idea what she’s talking about, and Carly says Sonny told her. She can’t imagine how painful it must be, but Margaux brought it on herself. Sonny tried to spare her, but she had to know truth. Was it worth it? Margaux says, like they care about her. Carly says, no, she cares about her family. Now that Margaux knows the truth, back off; enough. She doesn’t care if Margaux is the DA. She’ll do what it takes to protect the people she loves.

Drew shows Curtis a picture of Fiji on his phone, and says that’s where Curtis and Jordan are headed.

Doc tells Jordan that he thinks it’s misguided to involve Franco. They’ve made progress, and he’d hate to see Franco regress. She says that’s why she brought him in. She’s read his research, and is impressed at how easily get in the mind of a murderer; it makes sense. Is he speaking from experience? Not-Doc says, sorry? She says, his brother, and he says, of course. She’s sure it’s difficult, but she’d like to hear about his experiences with Ryan. Not-Doc says he learned a great deal about how what society might deem twisted, is an indication of superior intelligence. Like a chess expert thinks three moves ahead of their opponent. Jordan says that could explain Carly’s DNA. It was planted to frame her, or it could be a misdirection, so they pursue the wrong avenue. Not-Doc is flattered. She really read his paper. She says she did.

Franco doesn’t want to hear about school policy. He wants the names of the parents, and he’ll talk to them himself. Elizabeth says they won’t help. She asks if Willow can tell them why Aiden would be a target, but she doesn’t know; it’s unclear. That’s another reason she’s hesitant. She wants to reach out to the student and break the pattern. Franco accuses her of prioritizing the needs of the bully, but she says she cares about all of her students. It won’t stop by pitting families against one another. It will make it worse, especially for Aiden.

Finn asks what makes Anna think there’s more? She says she’s good at reading him; it’s a byproduct of caring. It doesn’t matter what she said. Anna isn’t threatened by what Finn once shared with her. Finn gives her the note, and she reads. Hayden’s travels are taking her to Rome in the next few weeks. She remembers Finn saying how much he liked a certain café, where he watched the world go by. She’ll send him the dates. Maybe they can meet and watch together. Anna says, they have unfinished business? Anna says Hayden still cares. She doesn’t think Hayden wants to meet to talk about the weather.

Elizabeth says Franco’s not turning into a third grade vigilante, right? He says he overacted, and Willow says, it’s hard to be objective when your kid is hurting. Elizabeth asks what they should be doing, and Willow says she’ll give them some materials that have great advice, and strategies on how to deal with a bully. She doesn’t want them to feel alone, and says she’ll be closely monitoring the situation. They should encourage Aiden to talk. Start with anything else, like a TV show, and gently steer the conversation to school. Don’t force it, or he’ll pick up on that and shut down. They want him to stay open, and make him feel safe. Let it come from him; the same with solutions. Allow him to choose how to help himself. Elizabeth says, let him be in charge. Willow says, he needs to feel empowered. Franco says, what about the kid picking on him? Willow says she’s trying to diffuse things, and keep him out of it. Maybe she’s naïve, but she believes there’s no bad seed; no kid can’t be redeemed. Every child has value, and everyone deserves a chance. Elizabeth says it’s not just a job for her. It’s personal, isn’t it?

Jordan tells not-Doc there’s clearly a method to the madness. He thinks it’s unwise to call the killer mad. Jordan says he’s not suggesting they’re sane. He says the killing was carefully planned to elicit an extreme reaction; it’s not at all random. He selected his victim carefully, and if he’s not caught, he’ll do it again. Jordan says that’s why he’s there. How do they catch the killer?

Curtis tells Drew that he’s incredibly generous. He doesn’t know what to say, and Drew says, don’t say anything. Curtis tells him not to get nonchalant. He knows it cost a fortune. Drew reminds him about dumpster diving, and Curtis says, maybe Drew does owe him. He doesn’t know how much time off they can get, and Drew says that’s why he left the reservations open-ended. Curtis calls him Mr. Smooth, and Drew says he has no excuse for not taking him up on it.

Margaux asks if Carly just threatened a witness. Sonny says he didn’t catch it. He tells Margaux the suspect has been cleared. Carly says she would know that if she hadn’t taken a road trip to sort out her family business. Margaux says she’s the DA, regardless. Margaux leaves, and Carly says it’s worse than she thought. Sonny has misguided compassion. Carly was prosecuted for crimes she didn’t commit, and committed to Ferncliff. Margaux badgered Mike, and made accusations about crimes she couldn’t prove, and buried her father next to Morgan, and he feels sorry for her? Sonny says he feels badly that she lost her father when she was a little girl. Carly asks if he’s sure that’s it.

Finn doesn’t know what unfinished business means. He fell apart the day she took off, and they lost the baby. There’s no unfinished between them. Anna says he might believe that. He says, clearly, she thinks differently. She asks what he’s going to do.

Willow says for her, the toughest part of being a teacher is staying objective. When the kids are with her, they’re her responsibility. It’s hard not to take it personally. She wishes she could confront the bully and fix it, but the goal is to make sure all the kids feel welcome, secure, and productive. If they work together, they’ll get through this rough time.

Outside. Elizabeth thanks Franco for coming. She’s so worried, she feels helpless. Franco tells her that they’ll do what Willow said. Give Aiden the space to tell them, and when he does… Elizabeth tells him, don’t even think about it. Focus on Aiden. When he tells them, they’ll deal with it together.

Willow calls Lulu, and says they need to have a talk about Charlotte.

Curtis tells Drew that he’s out of excuses. Drew says, great; refusing isn’t an option. Curtis says Jordan will flip when she gets the news. Drew says tell her Fiji isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. It will be waiting. He’s sorry about the wedding, but Curtis says, stepping up for his son is where he should be, and it makes him the best man Curtis knows. They fist bump.

Jordan thanks not-Doc, and asks if she can continue to use him as a resource. He was hoping she would ask. To take full advantage of his expertise, it’s crucial that she keep him advised every step of the way, so they can stay one step ahead of the killer.

There’s a knock at Margaux’s hotel room door. It’s Sonny. She asks what he wants, and he says he wants to finish this.

Tomorrow, not-Doc tells Ava that he has the perfect cure, Michael wonders if it’s a coincidence or ambush, and Margaux asks if Sonny is going to kill her.

The Shahs of Sunset – The Reunion, Part One

Tommy tells MJ she has some caboose. He says she’s extra, and touches her stomach. She wants them to talk to her mom. He doesn’t think it’s an appropriate time, but it’s up to her. He’ll be there. GG says she’s there to do what she does best, put people in check. Nema has no interest in being nice anymore Destiney feels the tension. We see a few clips of what’s to come.

We flash back to when the paramedics had to be called for GG hyperventilating during the last reunion. She’d smoked too much weed. She’s coughing already, and the producer is a little concerned.

Andy says they’re closing out a season as raw and outrageous as ever. Let’s get too it. He congratulates MJ. Wow. Mike has a bright blue plaid sportscoat and vest. In a pink suit, Reza says he was going for middle-eastern gay dictator from the 70s; very specific. Andy says GG looks younger every year. What’s her secret? Reza says, lots of work, but she insists she’s had no work done this year. Andy says Nema survived his first season. Nema says, barely, and tells Andy that he has notes. He’s ready for war. He claims Mike is obsessed with him. Mike says Nema is everything he wishes he could be

Between meeting new blood and revisiting old beefs, the skiing Shahs weren’t the only thing going downhill. We see clips of them skiing, Destiney being the worst. Andy says Mike introducing a potential girlfriend to the group, is like dangling meat over hungry lions. Mike says Mona held her own, and MJ says they were nice to her. Andy asks if it means he’s serious, and Reza says he needs their help to close the deal. Mike says it’s because he finds someone he wants to hang out with, and wants to see how they get along with his friends. If the lions don’t eat the steak, he brings her around again. A viewer asks if Mike was dating Morgan when he brought Mona to Big Bear. Mike says he and Morgan were taking a break, and he went out with Mona, but it was more of a friend date. GG says Mike made a big deal out of Mona’s nail polish being chipped. We see a clip of Mike pointing out a chipped nail when they’re at a restaurant. He says it would be like him not shaving, and Andy points out that he hasn’t shaved for the reunion. Well, it’s not a date either. Mike says Mona wasn’t reciprocating the love, so he wanted to deflate her ego. Destiney says he has little penis syndrome. Mike says women are the greatest gift, and he has a lot of respect for them. Nema thinks if a woman is going on a date that she’s interested in, she shaves her legs and does her nails. She probably saw him as friend. Mike wonders if she wanted a free dinner, and Nema says she doesn’t need one. She didn’t even call it a date; she called it having food with Mike. She said he critiqued her nails, and she thought it was a d*ck move. Mike says some girls like d*ck moves. Obviously, Nema has beef with Mike.

A viewer asks if Nema went to Big Bear to keep an eye on his sister, and he says part of him. Mike’s reputation precedes him. Mike says Mona told him that Nema had no Persian friends, and wanted to meet him. Nema says his secondary purpose was to keep an eye on him. Mike says he’s holding Nema accountable. They don’t want the Reza effect, talk bullsh*t and it’s fact. Reza says Mike was pissed because Mona didn’t compliment him. He asked who she thought she was, and said he had Morgan, who was all about him. Then he took Mona to Big Bear, and she said she wanted a high-end life. We flash back to Mike telling her she needs a multi-gazillionaire. Reza says after that, he was done with her. He tells Mike to keep it real, and Mike says Reza says things as matter-of-fact, and everyone believes him. Andy asks Nema if he thought it was a good match, and Nema says, absolutely not.  Andy asks what type Mike likes, and he says voluptuous lips and boobs. Mona is gorgeous, but MJ is more his type. Mona is model skinny. A viewer says Mike claimed to put Mona in the friend zone, when she friend zoned him. MJ thinks Mona wants to be the next Amal Clooney. Mike says he’s not pursuing Mona anymore, but Nema says the reality is, Mike still texts her. Mike says they text as friends, but Nema begs to differ. He asks her to try and make it work, but she won’t give him the texts because she’s too nice. Destiney says she’s seen them, and Mike says they’re tripping. He tells Destiney, shut up. She says she has nothing to lie about, and he’s gone back and forth since Big Bear. Mike insists there’s been nothing inappropriate, or asking to get back together – ever. Andy suggests leaving it.

Andy tells us that life after walking down the aisle is not always a walk in the park. Adam and Tommy join the group. Andy asks Tommy if being married is everything he thought it would be, and he says he’s a lucky guy; she’s the best. Adam is asked what’s what most challenging about marrying into the Shah group? He says there are a lot of egos, and he tries to get along without stepping on anyone’s toes. Andy says he does it well, and Adam says he’s chill. A viewer asks why Adam was so surprised and upset not to be part of the bridal party, and we flash back to that. Adam says he thought they had gotten closer, but he was more upset than he should have been. Andy wonders why MJ didn’t ask. She says she values the bond she’s building with Adam, but being a bridesmaid is a laborious position. She’d rather some people be guests with no obligation, and they’re also not there in the friendship. Adam says any time they feel a certain way, they discuss it like adults and move on. Imagine that.

A viewer asks what pushed MJ and Tommy into couples therapy? MJ says when they’d have an argument, they didn’t reach each other. She gets angry, and thinks he’s not listening. Andy says, so it’s a communication issue. Another viewer asks if Tommy got angry about MJ saying she’d cheat on him if he didn’t give her what she wants. Tommy says if he said the same thing, she’d go apesh*t. MJ says, in the moment, she was kidding around, and she appreciates him being cool. Andy asks what lessons Destiney has learned about watching the others’ relationships? Destiney says she’s worried about being married for six months, and having to give half of everything to a dude. As for therapy, she’s already in it for herself. The last thing she wants to worry about is someone else, when she’s figuring out herself. Mike says she has a vendetta against him. What did she say on break? She says she told Mike to show everyone his (sounds like) shubaloo, which I think is the same as dool. We see a clip of Mike on break saying his pants are too tight.

Andy says while Adam was focused on building a family, Reza had five-hundred thousand reasons to stall. We flash back to Reza handing over the check. A viewer wonders if it’s not Groundhog Day with them – Adam whining for a family and Reza putting him off with empty promises – and aren’t they tired of the cycle? Tommy disagrees, saying Reza had a lot on his plate last year. Reza swears he kept trying to tell Adam an opportunity came along where he was willing to roll the dice with his retirement money. It was probably the roughest patch they’ve been through. Adam says Reza wasn’t feeling appreciated, and he was focused on himself. He wasn’t giving Reza attention, and acknowledging the amazing things he was doing for them. Tommy says Reza just wanted a pat on the back. Andy asks if he got one, and Reza says he didn’t. He finished the house, and they moved in. He thought a card, flowers, a homemade dinner. He wanted one simple thing, and Adam couldn’t do it. It started a downward spiral, and had him thinking things that weren’t positive. Mike tells him to repeat what he said, and Reza says he wanted a divorce. Andy asks if they’re come over the hump. Reza says they’re working on it, and going to counseling and communicating. Nema says having been in a marriage that ended in divorce, you shouldn’t put the word out. You can’t take it back. Mike says, thank you Dr. Phil. Adam figures the next time Reza says it, he’ll say, fine. He doesn’t appreciate jumping through another hoop. Mike says, don’t use that word again, unless you’re ready to pull the trigger. Reza says they’d talk to someone first, and work on it. Then if it doesn’t work out, get a divorce. Andy says the feedback about Reza’s investment was overwhelming. The viewers thought he did the wrong thing. He asks what people aren’t getting about Reza’s motivation? Reza says what people don’t understand is that it’s a cultural thing. This is his money; he earned it, and had it before they met. They don’t have a joint bank account or a prenup. Reza says he did it for their future. He seized an opportunity for a great investment, but he needs to work on communication. Adam says he also watches his money, but Reza is more of a spender. MJ says, and earner. Andy wonders if the partner bringing in more money should call the shots. GG says she wouldn’t ask permission to spend her own money. Mike says he realizes what a healthy relationship needs, and Destiney laughs, thinking he’s the last one to talk about that. He says she’s never had a boyfriend, and she’s like, oh really? Andy asks MJ if she thinks Adam and Reza are equals in the relationship. She says they love each other, and that’s the most important thing, but they need to work on a more equal dynamic. Andy says they just celebrated their third anniversary. Where do they go from here? Adam says, the fourth and fifth.

Andy asks what Mike was referring to when he talked about knowing Reza and Adam’s secrets on Watch What Happens Live? We see the clip. Mike says they do kinky sh*t, and Adam shares that with him. He asks if Adam doesn’t have a nickname for his butt? Adam says, everyone knows that. I don’t. What is it? Something silly like Winky or more serious, like Mr. Hobson? Andy asks if that’s the dirt.  MJ says Mike made it sound like they invite other people into their marriage. Mike says he doesn’t know. Reza says maybe later on when things get boring. Mike tells them, if he said that, they’d call him a whore. Destiney says that’s different. He’s been consistent in ho behavior, but won’t admit it. Andy says if that happens, he is a single guy. Destiney says if she had a shubaloo, she’d be a ho too. Mike says saying that about him is derogatory to his ex-wife, and women he dates. Destiney wants him to get as much as he can, but he doesn’t own a lot. GG says Destiney doesn’t own a lot either. They don’t know a lot about her relationship stuff. Destiney says GG has only asked about one guy. GG says everyone has a level of how much they’re open. Andy takes a break, and kicks Adam and Tommy out.

Andy says, welcome back, like we’re the ones who left. Andy asks why GG made a crack about MJ and Reza after MJ announced Reza was in the bridal party? Was she jealous? GG says she’s not that type. She was throwing a jab back after one was thrown at her.  When someone throws a jab at her, she amplifies it, and throws it back. A viewer wonders why MJ refused to admit having sex with Reza back in the day. Mike says she did once, and MJ says she was joking around; she’s always said it didn’t happen.

Another viewer asks why GG’s comments upset MJ so much. MJ thinks GG is in an unhappy, dark place. Maybe if she was sober, she’d have reacted differently. GG says she’s always baked. Maybe MJ shouldn’t have been smoking too. MJ says she didn’t have to take it that way; she was on another level. If she hadn’t been, she might have realized she was being sarcastic. GG thinks MJ’s behavior is similar to Vida’s in that they use sarcasm to say what they want to. MJ is shutting her down. She says GG is jealous, and GG says, of what? MJ says GG can’t be happy for the people around her; it’s a pattern she has. She tries to be nice, but when GG gets like that, she’s giving it back. A viewer suggests MJ is getting a taste of her own medicine, since she stole the attention away from Asa being pregnant. MJ says she was intoxicated, and in a deep state of pain. She was coming from the hospital, and it was her reaction to her sadness. GG says MJ isn’t seeing how she hurts people.

Andy asks if they went too far when they introduced Shalom’s ex at MJ’s party. We flash back to that. He asks if Reza did it, and he says both he and MJ did it to piss GG off. Mike thinks it was hilarious. Andy says GG’s fight seems to be with MJ. GG says Reza will always be on MJ’s side. Reza agrees, saying GG has done him dirty, and he and MJ go back thirty years. Andy asks MJ to tell him something she loves about GG, and MJ says, her heart. Andy asks GG the same question about MJ. There’s a long pause, and she says when MJ cares about someone, she’s there for them. MJ thinks Andy picked the worst time to ask that; there’s too much bitterness and resentment. GG says she stands out because she’s the loudest, but the others poke at her under the table. Reza doesn’t care how much he hurt her. He says he doesn’t; she’s vile to him. She asks why he said they’d moved past it. Reza says the made up when she got back together with Shalom – we see a clip of their wedding – but then, Shalom told him everything she was saying was a lie. She’s lying about him suing her. Andy says they’ll get back to this. GG wants to show them something from her lawyer on her phone. Andy keeps telling her they’ll talk about it after, and she says because of Mike and Reza, she’s being sued. She says she’s out of there. She’s not being called a liar, and she’s being sued for bullsh*t. She tells them, have a good reunion. She storms off, and Mike says she creates crazy stories to ruin people’s character. They just joke around, and it won’t destroy her life. Andy takes a break.

GG is done, and needs the cameras out. Vida shows up. Reza tries to talk to GG. She says she’s done. Vida says she likes MJ’s makeup, but not her hair. MJ doesn’t care. Tommy tells her, relax. Reza asks Nema, what about GG? Nema says she’s not honest, and the minute she gets called out, she bolts. Reza says, when you’re evolving, you let sh*t fly. Nema says she thinks she’s evolving, but she’s not. Destiney goes to GG’s dressing room. She thinks GG should be there to speak her truth, but GG isn’t interested. She bows to Destiney for taking it. Destiney says they need to hear how GG feels because she matters. All GG wants to do is argue, so no matter what Destiney says, she changes it around to something against her. She says the show tried to invite Shalom there, and he’s suing her again. Reza and Mike believe a guy they just met, and she’s supposed to be family. Destiney says if it was her, she’d look them in the face and tell them what she thinks. She wouldn’t leave.

Tommy says he promised Shams that he wouldn’t let Vida and MJ fight. MJ says she can’t take it. Tommy tells her, chill, and Vida says, stop screaming. Tommy says, everyone needs to chill and get in a good space. GG walks outside, and toward the parking lot.

Next time, part two, Andy tries to get GG to come back, the Shahs talk about Shams, Destiney talks about her father, Reza yells at Mike, MJ tells Mike to stop living in Jessicaland, and Mike thinks Destiney likes women.

😭 Say It Ain’t So…

No, this can’t be. I can’t have gained a Denise Richards to lose an LVP.

https://www.eonline.com/news/987394/lisa-vanderpump-is-leaving-the-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills-after-season-9?source=email&medium=emn-content-3&cmpid=evening&content=emn-news

🏁 And Most Important…

FridayMadea

FridayDwight

FridayFerrell

 

October 21, 2018 – Chaos in the Camp, Eli’s Horror, 90 Day News, a Wife Wedding, Bye-bye Birdie, No & Back Again

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

The Walking Dead

A lone zombie ambles around. He joins a group feasting on someone. Hopefully, no one we know. They leave the human salad bar, and Justin rises. We see FINAL WARNING painted on the side of a building.

Rich gets out of bed, kisses a sleeping Michonne, and checks on Judith. He touches a wall hanging of her handprint, and leaves the house. Alexandria is looking pretty good. Their garden is better than mind was this year. Rick picks a tomato, and puts it by a grave. I assume Carl’s.

Michonne tells him her mind won’t shut off. He says it’s good she’s leading. She keeps the place safe and figures out how to make it better. She tells him Judith has a cough. There’s no fever, but she wants to take Judith to Siddiq just in case. He says he’ll take the day. At the last report, things were good. Maggie will be there, thanks to her. Michonne says, Maggie is trying, but she’s still angry. So is Daryl, and maybe others. He asks if she wants him to go. She wants it to work. He says it will. Even if everyone’s not all in, they’ll get there. Like they did. He thanks her for everything she’s done and is doing, and for her. He kisses her. He suggests taking a break, and she asks if he wants her to stop creating the foundation of a new civilization. He can think of another way to build for he future. Apparently, it involves getting busy.

Maggie and a nameless dude drive a horse and cart. Some Saviors step into their path. She asks why they’re not at the bridge, and the main guy says they’re looking for a friend who went missing. She says she’s just getting there; the shipment went missing. He asks if she knows anything about that, and she wishes she did. Hilltop needs the fuel that was the trade. He takes a tomato and eats it. She ask what his name is, and he says his name is mud. I guess he’s just always wanted to say that? He says she’s the widow. The woman with the braid tells Maggie that his name is Jed, and they’ll make good on the fuel soon as they can. Jed is getting his tomato deducted from his tomato ration (or something like that). As they drive away, nameless dude tells Maggie that she can’t believe word from those a-holes. Maggie tells him she’s giving it a chance.

After Judith’s’ doctor’s appointment, Michonne and Rick have family day with Judith. They play with her, and Rick reads The Wizard of Oz. They see a guy running toward their house, and Michonne goes down to meet him. One of the Saviors went missing, and is dead, but it doesn’t look like an accident. Someone definitely took him out. Michonne takes Rick’s hand.

There’s rioting in the bridge construction camp. Gabriel, Rosita, and some others try breaking It up. Alden insists they’ll find out who did this, and it won’t happen again. Another Savior punches him, and Carol says, enough. The Savior suggests killing them all right there; it’s better than getting it in the back. Arat says they don’t want this, they just want protection. Dude’s money is on garbage lady, and another guy thinks it’s Rick, finishing what he started. The crowd starts to turn on Anne, and Gabriel tells them to stop before it gets too far. Daryl says, it won’t, and aims his cross bow. Rick comes riding through, and tells everyone, back off right now. Arat tells dude to let it go. Rick says he’ll find a way to make everyone feel safe, and tells them, start the redirect. By the look on Daryl’s face, you know he thinks this is a bad idea. Rick asks Gabriel if he knows where Anne was last night. Gabriel says she was on watch with him all night. Rick tells him to keep an eye on her. Even if it has nothing to do with this, she’s up to something. He needs someone he trusts.

Alden says a couple of guns would help, but Maggie says, no guns. That was part of the deal. Rick tells Maggie that first, they have to find out who killed Justin, then think about what to do about it. The Saviors are the majority of the work force. The bridge is for all of them; they have to keep them safe. Maggie asks who he thinks did this. He looks at Daryl, but says nothing.

In the coffee tent, Gabriel asks Anne if she’s all right. She heard what they said. She didn’t do anything. He tells her that Rick asked if she was with him all night, and he yes, but she left after they… He lied for her. He asks if saw anything that might explain Justin’s murder. She says she needs some rest. She has an early shift. He repeats the question. Anne says he thinks she’s hiding something, and he stays silent. She leaves.

Rick sees Daryl sharpening a knife. He tells Daryl they found a small, round, clean puncture wound in Justin. Smaller and cleaner than a bullet hole. It looks like an arrow. Daryl asks if Rick thinks he did it. Rich says, no, but others do, so he’s making sure. Daryl says if he was going to do it, he’d have done it in plain sight. He doesn’t know who, but knows why. So does Rick. Bringing all these people together; it was always going to happen. Rick thinks it’s the right thing to do. The future belongs to all of them. Daryl asks if it belongs to Glenn, Abe, Sasha, the Kingdom, Hilltop, and Oceanside. Think about what they would want; what they would do if they could. Rick says he does. He’s wanted it too; maybe more than anyone. But killing each other when the world already belongs to the dead isn’t the way – not anymore. He knows Daryl doesn’t agree. He’s just asking him to try. Let the people see him trying, and maybe everyone can move past what happened to what could be one of the best decisions he ever made. Like not killing the guy who left his brother on a rooftop to die. Oh snap.

Rick says, everyone coordinate. Stay sharp, eyes open. They sweep the woods. Maggie hears some activity, and says she’s checking it out. Cyndie says there’s a house ahead; it might be from there. She used to live there before Oceanside.

They come to a ramshackle cabin with a gas pump out front. Zombies are wandering around, drawn by a loose piece of metal, banging around on the roof. Maggie says they have to deal with it before it draws more, and gives Cyndie a pitchfork. She tells Cyndie that she’ll get the roof; she’ll get them. She quietly comes behind the zombies and whistles, as we all do when we want a zombie’s attention. Cyndie forks one in the neck. She goes up on the porch, and zombie fingers reach for her through the boarded up door. Her foot goes through the rotted wood, and she gets stuck. The zombies break through the boards. Maggie gets to the porch, and stabs them one by one. Cyndie struggles with a zombie, her hand nearly going through its throat. It’s hit with an arrow. Rick and Daryl have arrived. Maggie knocks the metal off the roof.

The find Oceanside’s Bea knocked out, and Arat gone. Bea says they were headed toward the road, and hit from behind. Maggie says whoever did it, has their equipment, and Arat. Daryl notes that Bea has thin, aluminum arrows.

Rick says they need to find Arat. Maggie says the Saviors did. Carol says they claimed she was supposed to be on watch, and if they don’t find her by morning, the Saviors are walking off the job. Jerry says they’ll nab them, and then figure out what happens; whether it goes Gregory or Negan. Rick looks at Maggie. Cyndie says, whoever it is, when the time comes, they’ll get what they deserve.

Rick searches with Carol. She tells Rick that the Saviors need to want to be a part of things. She saw it starting again today, and wanted to end it before it began. They might have to fight whether they want to or not. Rick says they can’t let it come to that. Every day when he wakes up, and has the feeling he should kill Negan, and just keep going; finish them all. In that moment, it’s all he wants. Then he remembers who they’ve lost. Not just from Saviors, but the whole way. He knows he needs to honor them. Build life, not take it. It’s them or the dead; every life counts now.

Daryl tells Maggie that he doesn’t want to play nice for Rick. Maggie isn’t sure, and Daryl says he isn’t either. Maggie says part of her wishes she could see things his way. She sees Hershel, and thinks of how things could have been. She has to let it go. What Rick is doing is best for the future; for Hershel. They see a crawling zombie, who sounds like cat I used to have. Daryl finds an arrow in him, but says it’s not one of his.

Anne goes to the trash heap with a flashlight and gun. She removes a pile of stuff, revealing a metal box. She takes a radio out of it, and says, it’s Tardis Jadis. She knows they’re in range; she saw the helicopter. (That’s right! There was a helicopter at the trash heap.)  She hears something, and looks around. The voice on the radio asks what she has; an A or B? I say, excuse me? She asks, was it them; did they take them? He says, no pickups, but the deal still stands. A or B? She says, neither. Just her. She paid her share. The voice says she’s been compensated. She asks what it will take, and he says, an A. Tomorrow.

Gabriel asks who she’s talking to, and she asks if he followed her. He says, were they right? Did she do something to Justin? No who talking to? What did she do? She says, bad things, but not this. He says he stood up for her. He cares about her. Tell him the truth. Did she trade people? She says she did, and he asks if that’s what she was going to do with him and Rick. She says, yes, and he asks, why? She says, for her people. It didn’t start that way, but it ended up there. He asks what the hell that means, and she says she tried. She saw and she tried. In Alexandria is where it first went wrong. They suspected her. Now Rick suspects her. When the Saviors came at her, everyone stood by – except for him. She asks him to leave with her. There’s another place. It’s far away, but if they go together, they can get there, and it will be different for them. She holds out her hand, and he takes it. She says, there’s only one thing; he can’t tell anyone, but if he trusts her and helps her with one small part of the deal, they’ll have a life like he can’t imagine. He says, whatever it is, he can’t do it. He has to tell Rick. She says he can’t choose her instead? He says, not like this, and she says, all this time, she thought he was a B, and knocks him out.

Rick and Carol look around. We hear zombie gurgles. Carol follows them, and sees a guy. Jed comes up behind her, grabbing her, and holding a knife to her throat. Rick draws his gun, and says, don’t. Jed asks if Rick can get him before he opens Carol up. Rick asks if he killed the others, but Jed has no clue who did. He’s not killing anyone – unless he has to. This is about the guns. They’re being hunted, and they’re a target while camping out. They don’t need a babysitter, but it’s protection time up. He tells Rick to toss the gun. Rick suggests they just be on their merry way. Jed says he heard Rick yakking about how every life counts with him, but if he doesn’t give up the gun, Carol’s life won’t count for sh*t. Rick tells Jed to think about it; after this, there’s no going back. Jed says, there’s no going back for Justin, not for them. He brings the knife closer to Carol’s throat, and Carol says, it’s over. Rick backs off, holding the gun upward. Jed relaxes, Carol gets him in the knees, and he buckles. Rick says, he’s down now. They’ll fix him up at camp. Carol wonders, why not take him out? and Rick says, every life counts.

It’s nighttime, and Daryl and Maggie trudge through the woods. Daryl asks how Maggie knows about the place. Maggie thinks it’s where they lived before. They go into a building, and hear voices. Out in the back, Cyndie and some of the Oceanside girls stand behind Arat, who’s on her knees. Cyndie says she’s going to beg like she made them beg. Bea has a her arrow drawn, and Daryl tells her, drop it.  He asks if she took out Justin with that thing, and she says he killed her husband. Cyndie says they’ve all done things, but no more after this. Maggie says, after this, it keeps going. Cyndie tells Maggie, this was their home. Her mother and grandmother founded it with a group. There were so many then; men, women, kids. They built a garden where she played. Then the Saviors came, and Simon wanted what they had. He gave a final warning, and after that, they ran; they tried to forget. Then Maggie’s people came and asked them to fight, and they did, because they couldn’t forget. After Rick ended it, they went along. They didn’t think they had a choice. Until she hung Gregory. They knew Rick’s rules were not the only rules. She showed them the way. It’s time. Maggie says, they did this because of her? Cyndie says, they murdered her mother. They shot her brother, right here. They took everything, because they could. Arat begs, and says they’re not like that anymore. Simon would have killed her too. Cyndie says her brother begged for his life; he was crying, and Arat smiled. She told Arat, he was only eleven. Then she shot him, and what did she say? Arat says she doesn’t remember, but Cyndie tells her, say it. Maggie asks what she said, and Arat says, no exceptions. Maggie looks at Daryl. Arat begs him to help her. Maggie and Daryl walk away, leaving Cyndie to make her own decision. As Maggie and Daryl keep walking, we see Arat shot by an arrow in the background.

It’s daylight. The Saviors walk out of the camp.

Maggie and Daryl continue walking down the road. Maggie says they did it because of her. She’s given it a fair chance. It’s time to see Negan.

Next time, Maggie wants to make things right. Rick tells Eugene there has to be a way, Tetrax Jadis let’s a zombie loose on Gabriel, and Negan has a beard.

👄 Useless trivia from tonight’s Talking Dead. When the trash heap set was used again, cats and armadillos were found living in it. See? We can live in harmony.

👹 I caught most of Eli Roth’s History of Horror tonight, and I love it. It definitely delivers what the title promises. It reminds me of the anthologies I used to buy in Barnes & Noble’s bargain section when I first moved to NYC. Eli Roth is another favorite of mine as well, being involved with the Tarantino group, and having directed Hostel, which is an excellent film. It’s one of those movies that makes me uncomfortable, but it’s so well done, I’ve watched it a few times.

💍 Tonight, a whole new bunch of fools couples started on their way to the K-1 visa on 90 Day Fiancé. One couple already has a baby, and I’m very excited to watch the moronic antics love stories unfold. Meet the newbies here:

https://www.tlc.com/tv-shows/90-day-fiance/full-episodes/meet-the-new-cast?mi_u=

😧 Speaking of Which…

Some updates on Before the 90 Days idiots cast members.

Because Nicole is too lazy for real work.

https://radaronline.com/exclusives/2018/10/90-day-fiance-nicole-nafziger-company-lularoe-fraud-lawsuits-overcharging-sales-tax/

No surprise Angela has been on Maury Povich, since she confused The Couples Tell All with it. Destiny is real.

https://radaronline.com/exclusives/2018/08/angela-deem-90-day-fiance-maury-povich-talk-show-twice/

And it only gets creepier.

https://radaronline.com/exclusives/2018/09/90-day-fiance-star-angela-deem-daughter-scottie-charged-child-molestation-rape/

But then it gets better. Or at least more amusing.

https://soapdirt.com/90-day-fiance-darcey-drunk-jesse-claims-police-called-to-find-her/

And then creepy again.

https://www.newsweek.com/90-day-fiance-jesse-darcey-instagram-choking-pictures-1179059

🐣 A Sad Farewell…

Even a bird deserves to enjoy his golden years.

https://www.fatherly.com/news/why-the-original-big-bird-leaving-sesame-street-this-week/?utm_source=postup&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=24410&recip_id=200723

🍸 Favorite Wives…

High on my list. She deserves all the happiness in the world. Especially after being married to that cad Frazier, IRL.

https://people.com/tv/rhobh-camille-grammer-marries-david-c-meyer/

And my favorite. She who can do no wrong.

https://people.com/tv/camille-grammer-wedding-lisa-vanderpump-didnt-attend/

🍫 No. Just No.

I got an email with the subject line: Pretzels are the new Halloween candy. Not unless you want eggs thrown at your house and don’t want to enjoy your leftovers.

😭 Filed Under: How’d That Happen…

MondayKoala

MondayMonkey

MondayBack

May 27, 2018 – 90 Day Night, a Little West Shogunworld, Some Random Info & Memorial Day

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

I mostly watched reruns of The Office today, but since Fear the Walking Dead was replaced by Jaws 2 tonight, I was thrilled to be able to watch 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After? in its entirety, and not at 2 in the morning. I’m somewhat obsessed with this show because it’s like the worst people in the world are on it. Okay, Jax isn’t on it, and maybe Big Brother might take the number one spot, but some really awful people are on this show. And I love it. Here’s my take on the couples so far. Obviously, Mohamad (still watching for that headline with his picture) and Danielle aren’t joining the cast, and the least horrible people, Lauren and Alexi, chose not to participate, as they want some privacy. So without further ado…

90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After?

Pao and Russ went to Columbia to visit her dying grandmother. Whatever the hell city she’s from was very engaging and colorful, with a carnival atmosphere, but she’s apparently never been to NYC, since she said no city had that much passion in the US. I’m starting to think these two deserve each other. Pao is a selfish twit, insisting Russ move to Miami, leaving his native Oklahoma where he could actually make some money, because she wanted to further her nude picture modeling career. The sad part is, her family seem like decent people, and she claims to love them oh-so-much, but she’s barely talked to them in years, since moving to the States. I’m waiting for her to blame Russ, even though it’s obvious she loves Miami and being photographed naked for whatever gigs she does. (During the previews for next week, it looks like her family is going to blame Russ.) I should add that I’ve never seen her get her picture taken when she’s totally nakey, but might as well be. Russ isn’t happy about the lack of clothing, or even lingerie, which he finds different from a bikini because it evokes thoughts of bedroom antics. She’s basically called him a stick-in-the-mud for feeling the way he does, but I disagree. I’m not prude by any stretch of the imagination, but she knew how he felt, and agreed to terms she didn’t keep – all for the sake of this illustrious career. Honey, you are thirty. And while thirty isn’t old (I’d love to see it again), no one starts modeling at thirty. More like thirteen. I’m not denying that she’s doing legit modeling of some kind, but she acts like she’s Heidi Klum whenever she talks about her “career.” On the other hand, Russ can totally be a wet blanket. While in the city whose name I don’t know, a large group of motorcyclists came past. It turned out that Pao had known one of them since she was a teenager, and they’d briefly dated. Russ kept saying what tough guys bikers were, but dude, these guys were wearing neon and had stickers on their helmets. They were not the Hell’s Angels. To his credit, he did get on a bike for a spin, along with Pao, who rode with her friend. Russ got bent out of shape afterwards, when Pao said she and biker guy had dated, but it wasn’t anything serious. I mean, come on, it’s not like she suddenly hatched when she met him. She also has that mean queen friend, Juan, who’s been outright rude to Russ from the jump, probably because he lost his drinking/gossip buddy. I can’t imagine allowing a friend to talk to your SO the way Juan talks to Russ. Pao has repeatedly acted like she just doesn’t know what to do in the situation, but I know what I’d do. Dump Juan. I’m sure we’ll see him later in the season.

I just shook my head watching Anfisa and Jorge. First, he sought advice about divorce, and even his attorney thought he seemed more relaxed without Anfisa screeching at him every five minutes. I get it. He lied to her. But she could have gone back to Moscow if she’d wanted to, and she didn’t. Anyway, I blinked, and the next thing I knew, he couldn’t live without her again. They met at a restaurant, and she agreed to give it another shot, providing they get marriage counseling. But it looks like next week, she’s back on the fence again. I give up. Another two who deserve each other. I finally found out what the deal was that Jorge was alluding to with her profession in The Couples Tell All. Apparently, she’s done a nakey video with herself. While I didn’t look at the video, I did see some almost tasteful stills from RadarOnline, and it sure looks like her, pre boob job.

What I still haven’t found out is why Pedro calls Chantel Pinky. Maybe I don’t want to know. Their story was much of the same. Pedro’s momma is still waiting on her TV, whining for money, and saying his name in the most annoying way possible. He finally said he’d send her money to get her own damn TV, since it would be $1500 to ship. And I cry over $8. Chantel thought Pedro and her family would bond during a trip to a mountain cabin for five days. Pedro reluctantly agreed to go, but in the preview, says he wants to leave. So many cast members on reality shows love to cut out when the going gets tough, they should issue roller blades with every contract. He’s never going to forgive them for the display of disrespect to his family in the DR. My jury is out on that. After his mother called them stupid Americans and offered them chicken feet to eat, I’m not so sure I blamed them for not wanting more of the same. For the record, Pedro kept saying they eat chicken feet all the time, but other than his cursory nibble at one to prove his point, they went untouched by all. His mother and sister were definitely playing Chantel’s family. On the other hand, her family overreacted when they went to his grandma’s house in the middle of nowhere, sat in the car for a couple of hours, refusing to get out, and then left.

Molly decided to give Luis another chance, although I’m not sure why. Despite his insane ranting at her last season, about having Buddhas and owls all over the place, he actually seems like an okay guy. An okay guy who isn’t ready for the responsibility of a family. Daughter Olivia booked, deciding to stay at her boyfriend’s house while Luis was in the picture. Molly tracked her down, and Olivia said she was being selfish, but agreed to try and work things out. It sounded like Molly said she was done again, but we’ve been there before. SPOILER: I read that Molly has since filed for divorce, and Luis went on a social media rant about how TLC is racist and he’s going to sue them. Good luck with that.

Azan was still waiting on his K1 visa, while Nicole was on pins and needles. When Azan finally did call, no surprise, the video began to break up. How bad is the Wi-Fi in Morocco anyway? First, Azan was required to get a statement from a third party, confirming that the two of them had actually been a couple during the past two years. Then he was denied. Nicole’s mom thought maybe he didn’t really want to come, and had sabotaged things, but in the preview, the lawyer Nicole sees, tells her that he has ties to drug smugglers. Ruh Roh! These two seem too young to be getting that involved anyway. Face it, her weight is always going to be an issue for him, and she’s just looking for a daddy for her daughter.

Annie and David were living in friend Chris’s refurbished firehouse – mega cool digs – but Chris’s wife put the kibosh on Chris funding David. While I’m not sure what David’s problem is with the job thing, it seemed kind of mean to cut him off abruptly when Chris had promised to float him for a few months. He also suddenly asked for $1000 a month rent, which was like a double-whammy. Annie can’t work because she hasn’t gotten her green card yet, and she’s going stir crazy, since she can’t get a driver’s license either. Life in America hasn’t worked out the way she thought, since they’re clipping coupons and she had to pawn her jewelry. That’s right. You can’t believe everything you see on TV – we are not all the Carringtons. His son is moving in with them, which doesn’t make newlywed Annie too happy, since she likes being loud during sex, and… Never mind, it’s bad enough she gave me a mental picture that I can never erase.

🐎 Thoughts on Westworld, which I also got to watch in its regular time-slot. Wow. This show is a little depressing, but I love a good head lopping, and we’re getting a lot of that. The Shogunworld storyline was sad, and so is the wiping of Teddy’s mind. Mostly because I like James Marsden. It looks like Delores is only on her own side, and Maeve has telepathic powers, but is using them for good, trying to help other hosts and humans. Too bad she was a little late for Sakura.  I did approve of the man bun on the dudes in Shogunworld, so they are now added to the list of one – Josh from Sweet Home Oklahoma – that gets my okay. Another thought – whose cleaning up that mess?

🍸 Monday night at 9 pm, BRAVO will be serving up Vanderpump Rules: Secrets Revealed. It’s also being rerun at 10 pm. I love the Secrets shows. They were once called Lost Footage, until the network stopped insulting the viewers with that title. Like I really thought Andy Cohen looked in one of his desk drawers and suddenly found it. The clips are random, but usually more lighthearted, and I swear they save a few things that are better than what we’ve seen during the season.

🏥 General Hospital has no new episode tomorrow. They’re airing the episode from April 13. Normally on a holiday, they rerun something significant, but I can’t tell from the blurb which one it is; it’s so vague.

🙋 So it looks like I’ll be back on Tuesday. Some information for you in the meantime:

😪 The 8 Stages of Grief We All Go Through After a Relaxing Long Weekend

https://www.levo.com/posts/8-stages-of-grief-we-all-go-through-after-a-relaxing-long-weekend?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=daily_email&utm_term=

🎆 In Case You Didn’t Know Why You’re Off Work…

https://www.history.com/topics/holidays/memorial-day-history

MemorialDay6

MemorialDay7

 

 

May 20, 2018 – The Ball Comes To a Close, VanderReunion Wraps, a Mention of Terror & Sherry Trifle

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Robert drags Valentin off the stage. Valentin suggests they discuss it like adults. Robert says they’ll do that, and cuffs him. Robin asks if Robert is okay; he looks terrible. He says he’s fine, and throws Valentin up against the wall in the hallway. Valentin says there’s an explanation, but Robert says he wants justice. He asks about Henrik.

Spinelli goes to Peter’s office. Sam tells Spinelli that Peter is Henrik.

Anna goes to the pier. She calls out for Henrik, but we know he’s busy delivering a baby. She asks where he is.

Maxie tells Peter there’s no time to go to the hospital. The baby is coming now. Peter calls for an ambulance, and takes her hand. He tells them it’s not an accident; it’s a baby.

At the Ball, Lucy says to give a hearty welcome to Port Charles’s own man of mystery, Robert Scorpio. Then says she’ll be right back. Mike remembers the Nurses’ Ball being crazy, but what was that? Sonny says Valentin just got arrested. It couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.

Robert says first Valentin poisons him, and then imprisons him. Valentin says it was just a diversion. Robert tells Valentin that he knows Valentin took Anna’s child and gave it to Faison.

Lying by the side of the road, Maxie asks Peter if he’s okay. He says he’s fine, and she asks him to help her breathe.

Spinelli types furiously, and says, voila! Henrik’s inbox. He looks for any emails regarding the manuscript.

Felix tells Kiki that her couture is liberating her bosom. Kiki thinks someone backstage can fix it.

Sonny asks Dante what’s going on with Robert. Dante tells him that Robert said he had it under control.

Stella asks if Sonny has seen his father. Mike gets up on stage, and takes the mic. (Mike takes the mic.) He says a lot of people know him, but he might not remember them. He’s Mike Corbin, and has Alzheimer’s. That’s one thing he can’t forget. Sonny starts to get up, but Stella stops him. Mike says he might not remember much, but he remembers that the event means a lot to his son. He tells everyone that the show must go on, and starts to sing Frank Sinatra’s Summer Wind, as a random pianist accompanies him. He puts on a fedora, and an orchestra appears behind him. He suddenly forgets the lyrics, and begins to cry. He was ripping my heart out with just the song, and now he’s stomping on it.

Sonny goes to the stage, and tell the accompanist to continue playing. Sonny help Mike through the rest of the song, and they receive a standing ovation.

Ava says, great, she has to follow that, but Griff says she’ll be wonderful. She tells him from his lips to God’s ears. She leaves to change. Bobbie tells Sonny and Mike that they make a great team. Mike says they should take their act on the road, and Sonny says, maybe they will. Drew tells Sonny it was a helluva thing to do for his dad. Sonny appreciates that.

Maxie tells Peter that she’s reminding herself of the things she loves while she’s in excruciating pain. She tells him that he has to look at the baby, and tell her what he sees – go! He looks, and says the head is coming. She says she’s going to push the baby, and asks if he’s ready. He says, as he’ll ever be. He tells her it’s coming, and she can do this.

Backstage, Kiki gives Amy her dress and thanks her. Amy says it will just take a second. David walks in while Kiki is in her underwear. She asks what he’s doing there. Griff follows him in.

Olivia gives Cook 2 a bouquet of roses, saying she saved the Nurses’ Ball. Cook wouldn’t go that far, but Olivia says she would. The guests were raving about the food; it was nothing short of a miracle. Cook says the staff was competent, and the kitchen was well-stocked, but she should tell the chef to have more seasonal offerings. Olivia says she’ll pass it along, unless… Cook says, unless what? Olivia says unless she’s interested in taking over as house chef of the MetroCourt.

Sam reads an email from Henrik’s mother, saying they should meet. Jason says Anna cut him off. She planned on posing as Henrik’s mother, and Lulu was going to orchestrate something to draw him out, with Jason as back-up. Spinelli wonders why Anna wouldn’t want protection, and Jason says Anna refuses to believe Henrik is a threat.

Anna thinks about Robert telling her that she can’t tell Henrik that she’s his mother. At worst, he could destroy everything they love. Robert says he must never know, and she promises not to tell him. Anna walks around the pier.

Maxie howls and pushes. Peter says, that’s it, and we hear a baby cry, Maxie says, we did it. Peter says, she did it; she was amazing. He wraps his jacket around the baby, saying he’s dressing him for his debut, and hands him to Maxie, telling her, Maxie Jones, meet your son. They laugh, and I think, that baby is pretty big for a newborn.

Olivia says she loves Chef David; he’s done fantastic work, but she thinks Cook is a true artist. Her talent is wasted working in a private home, even if it’s the Quartermaines. Cook says, and with her gone, Olivia will get to have the kitchen all to herself. Olivia swears she wasn’t thinking of that. Cook asks if she’s going to keep her end of the bargain, and never set foot in the Quartermaine kitchen again. Olivia says she took an oath on her favorite skillet, and she’s not breaking that. She just thinks Cook has more to offer the world. Cook says Olivia is right. She does.

David tells Griff that he was looking for the men’s room. Really? He couldn’t do better than that? Griff says it’s down hall; there’s a sign on the door. David says he’s obliged, and leaves. Griff asks if Kiki is okay. She says she’s fine, but starts crying. She tell him that she’s stressed, but don’t tell anyone. Griff holds her while she cries, and Ava sees them.

Robert says Valentin knows all about Henrik; who he is and where to find him. Valentin says he has Anna walking into a trap. They have to find her before it’s too late. Nina has walked in, and listens.

Mike says it’s Sonny’s first time on stage since the Christmas pageant. Sonny says his dad is the star; he’s just the backup. Lucy comes back in another fabulous dress, red satin, with one shoulder, and tied at the waist on the opposite side. She introduces a woman of mystery – the less you know, the better. Ava sings You Don’t Own Me, with male backup dancers in tuxes. She looks pointedly at Griff and Sonny throughout the song. Nice. Bobbie and Sonny scowl. Scotty claps wildly. Griff looks serious.

Bobbie tells Scotty that she’s not sitting with him after he got on his feet to applaud the woman who destroyed her grandson. She’s not ignoring what Ava has inflicted on her family. Scotty says, it’s the Nurses’ Ball. They’re not supposed to be holding grudges. Bobbie says it doesn’t count with this one.

Lucy tells Sonny the only reason she let Ava perform was because she made a substantial donation, and it wasn’t the number she rehearsed. Sonny says the night is too important to let someone like Ava ruin it. Ava asks if Griff enjoyed her performance. Kiki tells her the audience loved it. Griff says it wasn’t the song she rehearsed. Ava says she had some last minute inspiration, and she owes it to them.

Kim gets a text that Maxie is on her way to the hospital. She has to go, but the nearest car is twenty minutes away. Drew offers her a ride.

Valentin swears on his family that he’s telling the truth. Robin comes out, and asks if everything is okay. Robert says everything is fine. She looks at Valentin, and says, there’s that, and Robert looks like he was run over by a steamroller; so forgive her if she doesn’t believe him. Robert asks where her mother is. Robin says she got a message, and she took off. She asks if Anna is in trouble, and Robert says, not if he can help it. He leaves with Robin. Valentin is cuffed and sitting in a chair. Nina says she can’t stress the importance of honesty right now. How long has he known who Henrik is?

Olivia says, the Hotel Elysium? In Rome? Cook asks if she can believe it, and Olivia says, no. What are the odds a recruiter was here on the one night she filled in? Cook says, crazy, right? But she couldn’t have done it without Olivia. She tells Olivia to keep the flowers; she has to pack and write her resignation letter. Olivia says Monica is going to kill her. Cook says, probably, but the bright side is she gets to have the kitchen all to herself.

The EMTs come, and Peter tells her that he’ll see her at the hospital. Maxie says her parents are out of town, and asks Peter to call Spinelli from her phone in the car. He tells her to take care of the baby, and he’ll take care of everything else.

Jason says there’s no way Anna would leave the Ball unless it was important. She’s meeting with Henrik. Sam says they have to tell her that he’s Peter. Spinelli’s phone rings. The call is coming from Maxie’s phone, and Spinelli asks if everything is okay. Peter says it’s him; Maxie asked him to call. She’s fine, and so is the baby. She’s on her way to GH, and she asked him to tell Spinelli to reach out to her parents. Spinelli says, on her way? He asks if she didn’t have the baby there. Peter says it’s a long story, and she’ll want to tell him herself; he’s got to go. Spinelli asks how is it that Peter is spreading the glad tidings? Peter says he delivered the baby, adding, goodnight, Mr. Spinelli. He hangs up, and Spinelli says, unbeknownst to Maxie, Nathan’s brother delivered her baby.

Peter takes a gun out of the glove compartment.

Anna waits. She thinks about Jason telling her it’s too dangerous. She’s way too close to this.

Nina tells Valentin, yes or no. If he’d spoken up sooner, would her brother still be alive? He knew who Henrik was, but tells her it’s impossible to say if his silence changed anything. Faison was on a collision course with both of his sons. He doesn’t think anything would have stopped it. Nina says she believes him. He says they have to get to the airport. Nina says he wanted to take them away, so when things blew up, no one would know his part in it.

Anna says it’s past midnight; he’s not coming. She hears someone, and says, Henrik? When she sees Peter come down the stairs, she says, Peter, but he says she was right the first time, calling her mom.

Maxie asks Kim how the baby is. Kim says a little underweight, but it’s to be expected. Otherwise, he’s in great shape. Maxie wants to be with her baby. Kim has an idea.

Sam wonders what the hell the deal is with Maxie’s baby. Jason needs Spinelli to look at the email again. He tells him to look for anything indicating a meeting with Anna.

Lucy says another fab, wonderful Nurses’ Ball is coming to an end. She thanks Olay, and I appreciate the product placement not being as heavy as other years. She thanks the performers, support staff, and crew who made magic happen. She thanks the guests, saying they broke the record; they’ve raised more money than ever. Since it’s the nurses’ night, they wanted to end it the way they started. Deanna, Epiphany, Bobbie, Felix, and Amy sing I’ll Be Your Champion. The other nurses join them. Nice harmony.

Ava thanks Kiki, who has an early day at the hospital. Ava says Griff has a room there, which is convenient. She leaves with Griff, and David tells Kiki that he’ll see her bright and early.

Valentin tells Nina that whatever she thinks is going on, there’s more to the story. She knows. He says he’ll explain, but she doesn’t know if she’ll believe him. Robert takes him away.

Kim tells Maxie that she can’t bring the baby in, but she has the next best thing. She shows Maxie her tablet, and says they have a webcam set up for virtual visits. Maxie says, he’s so wrinkly and tiny. Kim says she did great, and Maxie says, except for her water breaking in Peter’s car.

Spinelli tells Jason and Sam that the message was sent at 9:57 pm this evening. Midnight. Pier 55. Come alone. Jason wonders if he was going to the hospital, but Spinelli says Peter told him that Maxie was on her way. Sam says she’ll go to the hospital, and Jason says he’ll go to the pier.

Peter tells Anna so this is what the WSB has resorted to; posing as an abandoned boy’s mother to flush him out. He doesn’t know whether to be offended or embarrassed. Anna says there’s something he needs to understand, but he says no, he doesn’t. He takes out a gun.

Tomorrow, Nelle wants to go home, Nina talks to Lulu, and Anna tells Jason to put the gun down.

Today’s episode was dedicated to Rick Pessagno. You can find out who he was here:

https://www.abc.soapsindepth.com/posts/rick-passagno-general-hospital-dead-160450

Vanderpump Rules

Andy wants to talk about the surprising friendship of Jax and James. He asks how Jax went from wanting to punch James in the face to finding him amusing. We see a clip from the last reunion with James making fun of Jax, and Jax laughing. Lisa says they’re similar in the choices they make, and Tom says they’re both needy and compulsive. We see clips of them together, and Andy asks if Jax is a role model for James. Jax admits he shouldn’t be a role model for anyone, and James says they have fun. Lala says she was skeptical; they all know what happened with Jax saying James hooked up with Kristen. She didn’t see how they could be bros after all this time. Andy says she’s done it with a lot of people. James tells Lala to shut up, but Lala isn’t having it. Scheana says Lala is friends with everyone now, but wasn’t for a long time.

Andy asks Stassi about how the event planning started. Stassi says she wanted to be like Lisa, a boss-ass bitch. She wants to be well-rounded, and Lisa knows how to do everything. Andy asks if she was being bossy, but Stassi says she was scared to piss people off, and tried to treat everyone with as much respect as possible. Tom says it’s frustrating because Stassi quit, and then was handed a position of power. He thinks she should have been forced to be a server again. This is just about the stupidest argument for anything I’ve heard from one of them. Lisa didn’t need her as a server; she needed and event planner and had worked with Stassi as a stylist before. Stassi says they should be a team, and wonders why it affects Tom. Lisa says it’s what Stassi wanted to do, and she had a position to fill. Thank you, and thank you. Andy asks about Lala’s event, and Lala says Stassi was her bitch. Scheana tries to interrupt, and Lala asks if she can get a word out. Lala says, this chick, meaning Stassi, shows up an hour before she needed to, and she’s going to give credit where credit is due. Stassi made her job easy, and made the ambiance killer. We flash back to that.

Andy switches gears, and asks if it was about the pasta. We flash back to James using the catch phrase of the season. James says it was partly about the pasta. He was pissed off about it, and drank too quickly. We see a clip of him toasting to getting drunk. Lala says they were all drinking, and he and Logan started having a conversation that went south. He was her boy, and she defended him through thick and thin. James sneezes without covering his mouth, and everyone is like, wtf? Lala says she was joking, and it turned into him calling her man names and discrediting him; it was disgusting. We flash back. Lisa says James shouldn’t drink, and suggests he not even have a sniff of a sherry trifle. Lala suddenly jets off the stage, and Andy asks what’s wrong. Brittany says she could tell Lala was getting mad. James calls Lala dramatic.

Lala goes to the bathroom. Lisa starts talking, and Kristen interrupts. Lisa tells her to shut up, and I laugh. Lisa says James needs to understand Lala was loyal to him. She’d even said if he went down, she would too. She tells him that he needs to go out on a limb and apologize. Kristen follows Lala into bathroom. Lala says it’s not okay for James to say stuff like that. On stage, Tom says, dude… and James gets up. Tom tells James not to roll his eyes, and Andy says he just did. James says it’s just a nervous reaction, and Tom tells him to try harder. Ariana decides to get the other girls, and tosses her heels, since she can’t really walk in them. Lisa says they can’t all just leave, but then she goes too. Scheana pulls out her phone and gets sucked into the iVoid.

Lisa tells Lala to come back; James is going to apologize. She tells Lala that she’s a strong girl. Lisa asks if she’s upset because of everything or is it the place where she’s at? Lala says it’s what he did to her, and Lisa says tell him then. They come back out, and Lisa tells James and Lala to figure it out. Andy asks why Lala left, and Lala dabs at her eyes. Lisa changes places with Stassi, so she can sit next to Lala, and tells her to say it. Lala says James was her best friend. She would never tear him down, or his girl, and it felt like he really came for her. We flash back to James being nasty. She says she’s always been supportive of James and Raquel. Lisa asks why stick by him, and Lala says he’s a hurt person. Lisa thinks it’s coming from a place of jealousy; he’s always had feelings for her. Kristen says this is how he treats the people he cares about. Andy points out that Kristen and James were together for years. Jax thinks James is like a little boy, pushing a girl he secretly likes.

The trip to Big Bear is discussed, and James flirting with Lala in front of Raquel. We flash back to that. James says he loves Raquel, and Lala says he should have been flirting with her. In the past, James made her feel comfortable and confident, but things changed. She was sitting with her man – henceforth known as Randall, since they’re out now – praying that it wasn’t going to air. She doesn’t feel safe around him anymore. Andy asks James if he would get with Lala if she was available, and James says he’d still be with Raquel. Lala seconds that. Andy asks what it would take for them to be friends again. They’re in agreement on time. Lala reminds James of when they went for people about their physical appearance last year, and says she was mortified to see it. We flash back to them body shaming castmates in their interviews. Lala was hoping he’d learn from that with her, and he didn’t. She says the reason she stuck around is that he didn’t have the upbringing. He took on burdens someone his age shouldn’t have had to. But someone she adores might not shake it off as easily. James gets it and apologizes, promising to never say anything like that again. Lala forgives him, and Andy says, nice.

Andy asks Jax about the marketing position in Florida. Jax says it was marketing and social media. Andy points out Jax had said there was nothing holding him back from taking it. Jax says it’s not like he had an amazing job. Andy is like, um, you have a girlfriend who moved to LA for you. Brittany says he didn’t think about her. Lisa says he didn’t even ask her. Jax says he wouldn’t have gone without her, and it was misread. Lisa thinks he has a deeper appreciation for Brittany now. Andy asks him if he can say what Brittany’s professional passion is, and he stumbles around until he kinda, sorta gets that she wants to work with special needs children. He makes excuses for why he didn’t know this information about the person who is supposed to be closest to him that he lives with. Andy suggests that him wanting such a big change might have had to do with Schwartz and Tom moving on. Stassi says she can’t believe they took him seriously about the Florida job, and asks if anyone else saw it. Jax says he’s not making up, and Brittany says she heard him talking on the phone. Yeah, but did she hear anyone on the other end? Stassi says he’s always been the boy who cried wolf. Schwartz says it’s an annual thing with Jax. Andy asks why he didn’t take it, even though it was his dream job> Jax says he was scared, and Schwartz tells him to admit he loves LA as much as he’s said he hates it.

The finale party with Patrick is brought up. Stassi says she couldn’t sleep; she was so shook from the party energy. Andy asks Lisa how surprised she was when Patrick continually talked about her backside. Lisa says it was wrong on so many levels. They’d just met, and he was saying it in front of someone who works for her and is his girlfriend. We flash back to this obnoxious twit, calling Lisa girl several times, which irritated me the most of all of his detestable ranting. Stassi says she felt so bad, and reminds everyone that she was on Xanax and alcohol. Lisa said Stassi was apologizing to him, and was trying to make him feel welcome. She thinks Stassi finally had enough.

Andy asks if Scheana lost herself in the relationship with Rob even more than Stassi did with Patrick. Scheana says she hasn’t seen all the episodes, and admits to fast-forwarding through her castmates’ scenes. She claims she’s just behind in watching. Jax says watching it back, he wanted to punch Patrick, and Stassi should forget him. He says new boyfriend Beau is cool, and we see pictures. Everyone agrees they like him. Stassi says he’s fun, and not screwing up. Lisa tells her to just be herself.

Next up is the trip to Mexico. Andy asks Lala about her baby bottle. She says she’s on a low dose of anti-anxiety medication, and there are various things you can do, like snapping a rubber band on your wrist. She finds it comforting to have a bubba. It helps her not think about her anxiety.

Andy follows that with the rumor about James and Kristen hooking up. James says they were hanging out, and it turned into they fooled around and hooked up. Jax admits they didn’t, but says he didn’t say anything. We flash back to him saying something. He claims he only said the pillows were evidence. Lisa says he went all Secret Squirrel, and claimed they were banging. Kristen says James’s words were on the screen. Tom says there was a reason for that, but Andy says he heard it clearly without the subtitles. He says Schwartz had no idea what was going on, since he blacked out and went to another resort. Schwartz asks who doesn’t black out in Mexico? That would be Andy and everyone else. Andy asks if Jax doesn’t owe Kristen and James an apology, and in keeping with his tradition of being the worst human being on earth, Jax asks why? Lisa says he nearly ruined two relationships. Kirsten says she had to tell Carter before he saw it on TV. Brittany tells him he should apologize, and he does – for misinterpreting what was said. Tom apologizes too, since he thought the same thing. Andy talks about James telling Kristen that he never said it, and her throwing a drink in his face. She says her brain exploded, and she apologized to James. She says for Tom to go to her boyfriend was wrong. Tom says her boyfriend came to him. Kristen says Tom told him about what happened during their time together. He says he wasn’t trying to ruin the relationship; Carter came to him. Something I noticed from James’s unintelligible answer on the golf course, was that he said, a little bit, but not really, when he thought Tom asked if he and Kristen were hanging out. If they’d hooked up, that would be a pretty odd thing to say, even for James.

Andy says Jax lost it when he found out Scheana was trying to hook Brittany up with Adam – in his home. His rant at SUR is discussed. Jax says he decided to flip everyone off, and just then, Lisa and Ken walk in. He says Lisa’s eyes were bulging, and she says he was absolutely out of order. She had to get him out of there. Andy asks what he was thinking as he was storming down the street. Tom says it was like something got knocked loose. He exploded. Tom says he went back out, and Jax adds that the people across the street were watching. Tom says Jax was unstoppable, and Brittany says, like a bull seeing red. Jax says he was embarrassed, and went on a super apology tour the next day. Lisa says what about her? He says she and Ken have been nothing but amazing. She says she’s kept him in his job for years, and he says it’s a helluva thing to do.

Andy wants to talk about the break-up. Jax says he thought about it for a while, and went back and forth. Brittany says he’d bragged about them having sex that morning. The girls concur that it was hard to watch. Brittany was blindsided. Stassi says the sex thing made it really, really bad. Ugh! I agree. Jax says he honestly thought he was doing the right thing, and someone asks, why hook up then. We flash back to Jax saying why does anybody hook up? And answering his own question by saying, to get off. Andy says it’s kind of a mind f**k, and Brittany says it literally came out of nowhere. She couldn’t believe it, after she’d planned Mexico, his birthday at Hooters, and his birthday some other damn where. Jax thought it was the mature, adult thing to do, and Brittany says, beg her to stay with him, then throw it away? He says he thought he couldn’t be good for her. I wonder if his so-called Reiki master put that idea in his head, or just confirmed it? Lisa thinks those in unpredictable relationships should use contraception, and offers to buy Jax a condom. Andy asks how Brittany feels, when even Jennifer Lawrence is telling her to break up with him? Brittany says the first thing in her mind was to get out, since Jax wouldn’t leave. She told the Uber driver to pick a hotel. She’d put up with so much, and then for everyone to see that it was hard and effed up. She wouldn’t talk to Jax for a month. The girls all say she’s a badass. Andy says Jax wouldn’t leave the apartment? Tom said he was like, wtf? Brittany says she never hooked up with anyone, but seems a little vague about dating. She talks about staying in a hotel, and going back when Jax wasn’t there. She also did some traveling. Jax didn’t give up, and the feeling didn’t go away. She realized he’s the person she wants to be with. The pressure of fans wanting more for her was the hardest part. She’s tried to be a good person and live a positive life. She would never say mean things to someone she didn’t know. But in the end, she did what she thought was right, and put her heart first. Not that she thinks it’s okay to be treated the way she was. Andy asks other girls about that, and it’s unanimous that Brittany deserves a prince. I think Brittany should do Brittany, but I also still think Jax is vile. We’ll see if his father’s death changes him. Possible, but not probable.

Andy says what brought everyone together was the untimely, unfortunate passing of Jax’s dad. Kristen says he had to be vulnerable and honest, and stop fronting. Jax says he was tired of himself. Andy asks if he treats Brittany better. Jax doesn’t think he would do wrong again, and he’s been putting her first. Brittany says everything is better. Jax tells her that he loves her. She says he’s more calm, and not talking down to her. Andy thinks his papa would be happy that Jax has found peace and happiness, and hopes it sticks.

Andy asks Lisa why she wouldn’t fire Jax. She says he would have taken on the victim role, saying he deserved it. The only decent thing was for him to resign. Andy asks if she can imagine him working at SUR. Jax quickly interjects that he’d pick up a shift if she really needed him. Lisa says she isn’t that desperate right now. Jax insists he wasn’t a bad person at work. He says maybe he can get a job at TomTom. Andy asks Schwartz when TomTom is going to have its first blackout and panic attack. Schwartz says he’s like a caterpillar who is going to emerge as a beautiful business butterfly.

The question of kids for Schwartz and Katie comes up, and Katie asks, who would want that? That would be everyone, and Katie says, soonish. Andy can’t wait to find out what Stassi’s new boyfriend thinks about Lisa’s ass, and asks if we’ll be seeing him next season. That’s a yes, but not so much Lala’s boyfriend. Jax hopes he and Brittany are together the rest of their lives, and Brittany ays it just keeps getting better. Kristen is happy with two dogs and boyfriend. Scheana claims she’s having fun being single, and is staying that way for a year. Andy says it’s been a big year for Lala, including stepping out in public with her man. He asks what the goal is, and she hopes to be together forever. Andy asks if Ariana has softened toward marriage, but that’s a no. However, that’s not stopping them from also wanting to be together forever. Andy asks what about kids, and Ariana votes no, while Tom is all thumbs up.

Andy asks again if it’s about the pasta, and says, yes, it is. He asks Lisa who’s next in line to get married, and she says, him. Lisa says she loves all of them. Being on a reality show is like looking in a mirror. They might not always like the reflection, but she hopes they grow from it. Andy says usually Ken and Peter bring out celebratory shots at the end, but this time, it’s not about the shots. Giggy! Ken totes the Gigster in, while Peter passes out “shots” of pasta. With no forks. It’s interesting to see the different ways they try to eat it. James suggests they chase the pasta with vodka, and they all say, cheers! Giggy!

Next time – Vanderpump Rules: Secrets Revealed.

😱 The Terror wrapped its first season up tonight. The highlight was when Mr. Hickey offered his cut-off tongue to the spirit bear, and it ate his arm and ripped him in half. That didn’t work. I only half-assed watched this show, and hope to pay more attention if there’s a season two. The scenery was a standout, and I would think the desolation alone would be enough to make anyone go mad. Although I found it intriguing, it did remind me of seeing Jaws 2, or Jaws 3, or whatever installment it was, with my father. He leaned over and said, where’s the music and the shark?

🍨 Following Up On What James Shouldn’t Sniff…

http://www.geniuskitchen.com/recipe/traditional-english-sherry-trifle-strictly-for-the-grown-ups-264327

Trifle

May 16, 2018 – The Ball Begins, NYC Reconvenes, a Star Shocker, a Few More Secrets & Closer

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Nick Viall (The Bachelor) tells us that things are heating up on the red carpet. It’s a night of glitz, glamour, and especially heart.

Jason tells Sonny that Carly will be okay. Sonny is afraid she’s breaking down. It’s not like it hasn’t happened before.

Nina is in a magnificent red mermaid gown, with sparkly straps and accents. Valentin tells her how wonderful she looks, and that it makes him want to do unspeakable things. He’ll share her tonight, but after the Ball, he’s whisking her away for a fabulous vacation. He has tickets and passports for the both of them and Charlotte. Nina says, tonight?

Anna texts Henrik that she’s eager to meet him, and awaits further instructions. Robin arrives, and wonders why Anna is still in her robe. Anna says she needs a hug.

Robert feels along the walls of the cell he’s trapped in, but there are no secret passageways. There’s nothing except chipped paint. It looks like a really bad dorm room. He says there has to be a way out.

Sam stops in front of Peter’s office, but moves on when she realizes he’s inside. He looks at Anna’s message, and flips the lighter. Maxie enters wearing silver sequins. He has something to give to her. I wonder if it’s a prom corsage, but he hands her a velvet jewelry box.

Backstage on the phone, Lucy says everything had better be Velcroed, snapped, and sticky taped within an inch of its life. She wants no wardrobe malfunctions. She talks to one of the stagehands, and says no one is falling off the stage at the Nurses’ Ball. This makes me wonder if she’ll be falling off the stage when she has this year’s wardrobe malfunction. She tells herself it’s going to be fine. She tells her llama, it’s just you and me, Benny. My apologies for thinking the llama was a camel yesterday.

On the red carpet, Franco asks Nick if he can take the mic, promising nothing will have to be bleeped; it’s important to him. Nick hands the mic over, saying they have an impromptu guest commentator. Franco introduces Elizabeth Imogene Webber as the heart and soul of General Hospital, and the woman he hopes to call his wife. Elizabeth thanks Nick for indulging Franco, and thanks us all for watching. Nick says it was unusual, but he couldn’t have done it better. Franco and Elizabeth get their pictures taken.

Lucy rants about the menu cards. Olivia is freaking out, and Lucy asks if something is wrong. Olivia says she’ll handle it. Lucy tells her it’s the Nurses’ Ball. Nothing can go wrong.

Jason tells Sonny that Carly would never jeopardize her grandchild’s life; Nelle is lying. Sonny understands why he wants to believe that, but Carly’s been unraveling for weeks. Jason has to leave, but says he’ll be in touch.

At the hospital, Kiki is working. David gives her a list of files to pull and have on his desk by 7 am. Kiki yawns, and he asks if she’s tired, but she says no, she’ll be happy to do it. Molly calls her, and she says it’s nice of her, but it doesn’t look like she’s making it to the Ball. She has too much work. She’s bummed too, but maybe next year. David overhears.

Finn looks at some charts in his office, and thinks about seeing Anna’s will. Alexis walks in, and says he looks dapper. He thought he was picking her up, but she figured she’d save him a trip. He asks if she was too antsy to wait, and she says being the center of attention isn’t her favorite thing. She’s looking forward to their date and his introduction though, but he says she might want to hold her enthusiasm until she hears it. They leave for the Ball.

Nina tell Valentin that Charlotte isn’t out of school yet. He wants to go someplace that makes her smile, where they can relax and connect as a family. She says she’ll think about it, but right now, she has to rock the red carpet.

Robin doesn’t think Anna is listening, and asks what’s going on? Anna says it’s just a case she’s working on. Robin says, mm-hmm, Anna asks what that means. Robin asks if the case would happen to be named Hamilton Finn, but Anna says he’s moved on and so has she. There are no unresolved feelings. Anna goes to get dressed, and Robin laughs.

Peter tells Maxie that he hopes he’s not overstepping. He saw it and it reminded him of her, but she’s not obligated to keep. She asks if she can see it first, and he opens the box to reveal a stunning necklace with three pear shaped diamonds going across the chain. He says she can take it back if it’s too much. She tells him to slow his roll. She says it’s beautiful, and it is too much, but she’s learned in life never to return jewelry. I’m thinking it’s funny how when a character is given a necklace, they’re never wearing one, even when they’re in a formal gown. He puts in on her, and she asks how it looks. He says, like it was made for her.

Nina gets to the Ball, and Nick introduces her as his co-host. Josslyn, in a pink sleeveless gown with sparkling flower appliques, comes in with Oscar. She says she feels like Cinderella. Oscar tells her that she’s prettier. He kisses her, and I’m in love – with her matching pink tassel earrings.

At the Ball, Jason sees Spinelli, who says his services are at Jason’s disposal. Jason says Carly is locked up until morning. He can’t help her tonight, so Spinelli can help follow-up on the search for Henrik. Spinelli thought it was important to be there for Maxie. Jason says he’ll examine all claims, and try to figure out how Nelle set Carly up.

Stella visits Sonny, who tells her that he had to fire another nurse. She says sometimes it takes a while, but he’ll find the right fit. Mike comes out, saying he thought he heard the voice of an angel, and he was right. He asks if she can keep them company for a while, but she has to cut it short; she’s going to the Nurses’ Ball. Mike says they have to go. He performed in it once. Sonny says they’re not going, but Mike goes upstairs to put on his tux. Sonny laughs.

Jordan, wearing a burgundy gown with sequin accents and a keyhole neckline, walks in with Curtis. Nina says they’re the perfect ensemble for special occasion, and tells them take everything in and have a blast.

Olivia sits in the Quartermaine living room with someone we don’t see yet. She says it’s the biggest night of the year, and she forgot the chef had a scheduling conflict. Carla Hall, playing Cook 2, is in the other chair, and says she has the perfect solution. Olivia says, she’ll cover her at the hotel? Cook says, no, she can cook.

Jason goes to Anna’s room, and Robin hugs him. She says she’s ready hear about their adventure in Switzerland. Emma was living her best life, picking out a suit for him. Jason says it’s good she and Anna are spending time together; things have been hectic with a case. Robin says, so there actually is a case. She thought it was just a disagreement with Finn. Jason doesn’t know about that, but she’s fixated on finding Henrik. Robin asks if she should be worried, but he says just stay close. If Anna confides in anyone, it will be her.

When they get to the Ball, Peter tells Maxie that they don’t have to do the red carpet, but she says it’s hugely important night to show their support. An interviewer asks if she’s looking forward to anything in particular. She says fashion is her weakness, but her favorite part is that everyone steps outside of themselves and comes together to do good. Nina says word on the street is that it’s Peter’s first Nurses’ Ball, and asks what he’s expecting. He says he’s heard it’s the night to expect the unexpected. Valentin looks shocked to see him.

Valentin walks in, and Nick says Valentin obviously had the good taste to marry his co-host. Valentin says he’d do anything for this woman. He hugs Nina, and looks at Peter over her shoulder.

Robert lies on the cot. He looks at a barred window that’s high up.

Anna is startled to see Jason. Robin says she’ll meet her downstairs. Anna says she didn’t expect to see him, and he asks if she’s reached out to Henrik. She says she’s still waiting for a reply. Jason asks if she’s going to tell him, and she says, of course. He says as much as she doesn’t want him to find Henrik first – Anna says, and kill him – he doesn’t want her to walk into a trap. They need to stick to the plan, and work together. Anna agrees.

Maxie is surprised to see Spinelli.

David asks Kiki why she didn’t remind him the Nurses’ Ball was tonight. He tells her work can wait; she deserves a night off. She asks if this is a trick, and he says to go and enjoy herself. She says she’ll be back bright and early in the morning. He tells her to have fun.

Olivia says she knows she and Cook 2 have had their differences. Cook says Olivia blatantly ignored her wishes. Olivia says it’s a big kitchen; she thought they could share. Cook says she can have the whole kitchen at the MetroCourt to herself. Olivia says, help me, Cook 2, you’re my only hope. She can’t do it by herself.

Ooh, Sam’s dress! It’s navy and red, off-the-shoulder with short lacy sleeves, and sparkly. Nearly all the women have seriously plunging necklines. Alexis and Finn arrive, and Nick says even though she didn’t win the mayoral election, she’s clearly won the people’s hearts. Anna walks in while she’s texting, and trips. Finn catches her in a dip. Nick asks if Alexis and Sam made a pact to come solo, and Nina says, female empowerment! Alexis says she’s actually there with Finn. Robin tells Anna, sure there are no unresolved feelings.

Sonny can’t believe his wife spending time in jail. No way is he putting on a tux and going to the Ball. Stella asks if there’s anything he can do for Carly tonight, and he says, no. She says, but there is something he can do for his father. He says it doesn’t feel right, and she says Mike has Alzheimer’s; his time is short. Opportunities like this won’t come around very often. If she was him, she’d take it. Mike comes down in his tux, saying he needs help with his tie. Sonny says if Mike really wants to go, they’re going. Mike says this beautiful woman here is his date.

Robin and Anna walk the carpet. Robin is wearing a sparkling silver brocade number, and Anna is wearing a pretty purple blazer with a blue sash and black pants, but I’m wondering why no gown? Does she think she’ll have to jet? Anna says they’re there tonight so others can life live as successfully as Robin, and hopefully, one day they’ll eradicate HIV and AIDS.

Elizabeth tells Franco nice of him to slip in her middle name. He says it’s hands down, his favorite thing about her.

Spinelli brings Maxie something to drink, and takes her in to find a chair. Sam thanks Peter for taking care of her. He says he would have come alone, so they’re helping each other. Curtis watches them, and Jordan says, eyes on her. They kiss.

Olivia tells Cook how much respect she has, but Cook says flattery will get her nowhere. Olivia says it isn’t flattery; she thinks Cook is a culinary genius. Cook says she didn’t think that when she was infiltrating her kitchen with her manicotti. Olivia tells her it’s for a wonderful charity, and she doesn’t want people to starve, does she? Cook says she’ll do it on one condition. Swear on her favorite skillet that she’ll never set foot in the Quartermaine kitchen again.

Kiki walks the carpet in silver sequins. Ava, wearing black sequins, comes in with Griff. Lucy says she heard Ava is gracing the stage. Griff says Ava is a woman of many talents. Lucy tells her, good luck, and Ava asks if she doesn’t mean, break a leg. Lucy tells her, good luck.

Sam stands in the empty room before everyone comes in. Jason sees her, and their music plays. He asks if she’s taking a breather, and she says it’s a little much out there. He tells her that she looks beautiful. She takes it that he’s not coming, and he says he gave a donation. She asks what he’s up to, and he says he’s using the Ball as a cover to work on finding Henrik. Sam says she has her own thing going on. He tells her again that she’s beautiful, and I roll my eyes.

Josslyn tells Oscar that she’s having the best time ever, and the Ball hasn’t even started. She walked the red carpet with her boyfriend, who she’s in love with. He says he loves her too, and they kiss.

Elizabeth sees Robin, who asks if anything is going on. Elizabeth says, not a thing. Everything is back to normal, better than normal. Franco comes up behind her, and puts his arms around her. She says she’s happier than she’s ever been. Robin says she’s happy for them both.

Ava drinks a martini, which Griff calls liquid courage. Kiki asks if she’s ready to bring the house down.

Maxie introduces Peter to Robin. He says Robert Scorpio is her father, and she says, the legend himself.

Valentin asks Anna if she’s enjoying herself. She tells him that she’s sure Robert will do what’s needed with Henrik. Valentin is sure he will.

Not much he can do from a cell though. Robert starts to rub one of his arms, and keels over. Hmm… Is he having a heart attack, or does he think someone is watching through the window?

Cook tells Olivia, those are the terms; take it or leave it. Olivia says, okay, fine. She swears on her favorite skillet that she will never again set foot in the Quartermaine kitchen. Cook says, then she has chef for the Nurses Ball. They shake hands.

Mike, Sonny, and Stella come in; Stella in black and silver sequins. Sonny is asked why the Ball is important to him, and he talks about Stone dying, and says he doesn’t want another person dying from the disease. Nina asks who the beautiful lady is, and Mike says she’s with him. Sonny isn’t keen on the picture taking, but Mike says he’s out on the town with his son and best girl, and wants photo evidence; he might not remember. Sonny doesn’t want to do it, but Stella makes him take a photo with Mike.

Lucy walks the carpet with her llama, who is apparently also her date, in a black and white, open shouldered gown. She says it’s a magical evening. Nina tells her to have fun, and she says she always does.

Robin sees Sonny and they hug. Jordan tells Curtis that she didn’t know Stella would be there. He says neither did he. Finn asks Alexis how nervous she is, and she says on a scale of one to ten, she’s at 6,759, but she’s got this. Kiki tells Ava that she would have been disappointed if she missed her performance. David says, fancy seeing Kiki here.

On the phone, Valentin sets up security for the house in Morocco.

Robert lies on the floor unconscious.

Sonny asks Olivia if she’s okay. She says there was a minor crisis, but she has it handled. Although it cost more than she thought.

The doors open. Everyone is seated. Lucy welcomes them to the Nurses Ball, and they applaud. Peter and Valentin glare at each other.

Next time, Chase hopes he didn’t ruin a surprise, Peter says he’ll handle Anna himself, Sam is going to see what Peter is hiding, and of course, the entertainment. I loved Carla Hall, and hope she continues to be a recurring character even after the Ball is over.

The Real Housewives of New York City

In Puerto Rico, Bethenny introduces Dorinda around to the crew helping with cash card delivery. In her interview, Dorinda is glad Bethenny is good at putting things behind her. It paves the way for the day. How motivational poster. Bethenny explains how they’re going door to door, and giving out the cards. The driver says it will take years for recovery. Guys who were in Afghanistan think it’s bad. Bethenny says it looks like the hurricane was yesterday. Dorinda says the news coverage didn’t do it justice, and it doesn’t seem to be getting better. It’s complete devastation. She says it’s a feeling of total isolation. Bethenny gives one old lady two cards ($600) and everyone is crying. It sucks man. I went through Hurricane Sandy, but it was nothing like this. Dorinda says we complain about baloney, and she’s humbled by their positive attitude. Bethenny is glad Dorinda came.

Ramona picks up Sonja in a limo. They’re going outside of the city. Sonja says she doesn’t even like to walk out of her neighborhood. It’s Ramona’s way of apologizing. Sonja said what hurt her was Ramona not being supportive at LuAnn’s lunch. Ramona says sorry she disappointed Sonja, but she didn’t know what to do. In her interview Sonja says their friendship isn’t worth the pettiness. They go to an upscale store, where Ramona is friends with the owner. They look at a chinchilla coat and I go, eww. Have you ever seen one? They’re adorable.

LuAnn meets with someone named Ben about doing a cabaret act. It’s something she’s always dreamed of doing. She’s terrified, and that’s why she has to do it; it makes her strong. In her interview, she says she sang on Broadway once, and Liza Minelli told her, gurrl! She says Ben has done a lot of shows and knows everyone in the business. He tells her that you don’t regret mistakes, but steps you don’t take. She’s always bounced back. She says she’s made a lot of mistakes, and fallen on her face a few times. We flash back to her spill into the bushes. Ben thinks they should take their time and is already thinking of people he wants to use. He asks her to just sing something off the top of her head like Happy Birthday. She sings Happy Birthday, sounding better than she has in the past. He doesn’t think the voice matters – which I agree with – but her voice is good.

Bethenny’s group goes to town with no electricity. She says Puerto Rico after dark is intense. The first time they were there, the people were in mud up to their ankles. It’s a freakin’ mess. Bethenny says it’s not a huge place, and you can make a dent going to individual people. Omar talks about roaches and rats and such coming out at night. They’re the first people from the states giving money. Bethenny says they’ve heard that a lot. None of the money advertised is getting there. Sadly, that happens all too often. Dorinda says you’d be surprised what you can do when you have to, and the people are doing it with pride and dignity.

The girls meet for dinner. Dorinda took a pass, and Bethenny wants to wait for her to be there to talk about Puerto Rico. She asks how Tinsley’s weekend was with Scott, and I don’t hear what Tinsley says, but there’s applause afterward. Maybe I don’t want to know. Sonja arrives. She tells Bethenny she went on a date with someone she’d recommended. Tinsley is confused, and asks Carole what happened to Frenchie and Rocco? Tinsley and Carole continue talking about Sonja. In her interview, Bethenny says Sonja doesn’t seem to belong, no matter what she does. She feels sorry for her. Clearly, Tinsley and Carole aren’t into Sonja. Bethenny points out that once Tinsley got a boyfriend, who she met through Carole, she blew Sonja off. Bethenny has compassion for Sonja, and interrupts Tinsley’s conversation, saying it seemed like she was at the bottom when she came back to the city. Tinsley wonders where this is coming from. In her interview, Tinsley says Bethenny is picking on her regarding things she knows nothing about. She tells Bethenny that Sonja lied about her having no friends. In her interview, Carole doesn’t know what’s going on. She says Bethenny is spinning Sonja’s story because she’s not doing a good enough job herself. Bethenny says Carole always defends whoever she’s sitting next to. Carole says she’s a ride or die chick, and Bethenny is loud. She tells Bethenny to get off her jock. Bethenny says she loves Carole, but she chimes into whatever another person thinks. In her interview, Bethenny says Carole doesn’t have her own voice. LuAnn thinks this is sad. She doesn’t think the issue between Bethenny and Carole is about Sonja and Tinsley.

Carole goes to the Cosmopolitan magazine office. Editor Michele is a new friend, and she’s going to write something for them. Carole hasn’t written in years, and thinks it’s the perfect opportunity to get back into it. Michele is thinking something like an “on my mind” column, that runs a page. Carole says what’s on her mind is sexual harassment. She thinks it’s a good time to write about self-esteem, and how you need to affirm it every day. Michele asks how Carole is with deadlines. She’s on to how writers put things off.

Bethenny meets Dorinda for lunch. Dorinda says it’s weird, seeing Bethenny in this environment again. Bethenny says, it’s so clean. Dorinda says it readjusted her mindset. Now, she’s quiet in the morning, and thinking more positively. She asks about the dinner, and Bethenny says she was better off not going. There was too much yelling. Tinsley was going on about Scott. Bethenny thinks Sonja gave Tinsley a leg up, and now Sonja could use one. She says Carole was fighting Tinsley’s battle, and she’s noticed it’s a pattern. Carole jumps on everyone else’s argument. She tells Dorinda that she approached Adam about doing some photography work for the charity, and he asked what the comp was – no one else has ever done that; everyone works for nothing. When she told him there wasn’t any, he said he couldn’t afford to lose a week’s work, and it rubbed her the wrong way. She thinks he’s a bit of an operator. When she said something to Carole, Carole made excuses for him, and said everyone is an operator. Dorinda says, it’s a charity. She asks if Bethenny and Carole’s relationship has changed, and Bethenny says she’s been knee-deep in Puerto Rico, They were on totally different pages In her interview, Bethenny thinks Carole has more in common with Tinsley; she’s not married, has no kids, and no career. Dorinda wonders if they’re at odds, and Bethenny says Carole knows it’s a little off.

Sonja wants her place rented so she can move on with her plan. She invites LuAnn and Ramona over for a painting party. LuAnn is glad she’s finally doing something. Sonja shows them how the clutter is gone. Almost. She has suits for them to paint in, and says they’re going to touch up the chairs in the garden. She takes them out on the patio, and mixes the paint. They discuss Carole and Bethenny. LuAnn thinks Tinsley could be more grateful, and could have left if she wasn’t happy. Sonja says she left when Scott came into the picture. In her interview, Sonja says it’s awkward, but she’s a big girl. She tells them to paint over the bird crap. No. Just no.

Duff is a close friend of Carole’s, and has just written a book about chronic pain. She’s having a book party in what looks like a nice apartment. There’s a vodka fountain, and everything is decorated for Christmas. LuAnn and Ramona arrive first. Ramona tells Carole she feels that Carole has a voice now, and she loves it. She can’t believe Bethenny called her a puppet. Carole doesn’t believe Bethenny would say that. Ramona says maybe it’s more what she thinks than what was actually said. In her interview, Ramona says Carole is in denial. She might not have repeated the right words, but it was derogatory.

The second she gets through the door, Carole immediately asks Bethenny if she said Carole was a puppet. Bethenny says she wouldn’t use that word. They agree Ramona is nuts. In her interview, Bethenny says she implied others pulled Carole’s strings, but didn’t use word puppet. Tinsley, Sonja, and Dorinda join the party. Bethenny asks why Ramona told Carole she’d called her a puppet. Ramona says that was her interpretation, and Bethenny asks if she’s doing interpretations now. In her interview, Bethenny says Ramona thrives on other people being in discord, so she can swoop in to back underdog.

Dorinda tells everyone that she’s having a murder mystery dinner in the Berkshires. The time period is the 1920s, and they’ll all have characters. She passes out envelopes, and they all read their character names and descriptions. LuAnn says she wouldn’t be surprised at a murder in the Berkshires.

Tinsley wants to talk privately with Sonja. She’s heard Sonja has been saying things about her, and she wants to move forward. If Sonja ever felt she wasn’t grateful, she was and always will be. He tells Sonja if she has an issue with her, tell her, not everyone else. They agree to find time for each other. In her interview, Tinsley says she doesn’t want to get into a back-and-forth with Sonja, and get on a ride she can’t get off. Dorinda says she saw Tom wandering around with some tramp. He’s having a New Year’s Eve party on the same boat the engagement party was held on. We flash back to Dorinda’s tipsy toast. Carole joins them, and asks if Tom got a deal. In her interview, Dorinda says she let him know what a d-bag he is. LuAnn is glad she wasn’t there.

Carole thanks everyone for coming. She’s happy to share Duff with them tonight, and says Duff is the most amazing girl she’s met in New York. Someone spills wine all over the books. Not Dorinda.

Next time, the Berkshires weekend, Carole thinks there’s a disconnect with Bethenny, and Carole and Bethenny clash.

🌟 On Star, Cassie hired Derek for something, but I have the feeling it’s not what he thinks. Ayanna told the crew that tonight was a game changer; they were putting every resource behind Noah. Noah promised not to let everyone down. Jahil went to the trailer, and said he was tearing up Angel’s contract with Andy, but Angel was more concerned with being deported. Angel said if Jahil wanted to help him, stay out of his business. Ayanna appreciated Carlotta’s help, and Carlotta said she could show it by helping Take 3. Alex wanted to be able to do projects outside of Take 3. Simone was tired of the drama, and quit. Star accused her of overreacting. Carlotta told them tp do what they wanted, and went to the hospital. Jaden was now on the list for a kidney.

Maurice encouraged Star to go solo too, or watch Alex make her way to the top. Jahil told Andy that Cassie was no one to play with, and as they were talking, there was a drive by. Jahil got shot, but said it was just a graze. Carlotta dressed his wound, and asked who’s trying to kill him? He asked if it mattered, and came on to her, saying she’s his heart, and no one matches what they have. They got busy.

Simone told Angel that music was Star’s dream, not hers, and they decided to run away. Maurice told Star to take her anger to the booth, which she did, and told him to drop the track. Carlotta and Jahil danced, and Jahil started bleeding. Apparently, he had a heart condition only Carlotta knew about, and it created a situation where they couldn’t stop the bleeding. Simone asked if Star didn’t want something more than music, but Star didn’t know what that was. Carlotta asked Cotton to pray with her, and Cotton said, it had been so long, God didn’t want to hear from her. Aww. Miss Lawrence told Carlotta that Mexicans are resilient, and Jahil would be fine.

Carlotta was finally able to see Jahil, who told her that it had always been her, and he loved her. Then he flatlined and died. I was not expecting that. There you go, Benjamin Bratt. The good news was, that his kidney perfect match for Jared. I wondered why they hadn’t known this before, or if Jahil only had one kidney. in which case, he wouldn’t be needing it anymore. Carlotta told Cotton that Jahil’s heart couldn’t withstand him bleeding out. He’d said he wouldn’t let Jaden die, and he kept his word. Carlotta kissed Jahil one last time, and said goodbye. This whole thing was super sad.

Derek told Alex it didn’t have to be awkward every time they saw one another; life is too short. He was proud of her, and said if she needed anything, he was there. Ayanna stared at a pregnancy test in the limo. I wasn’t sure what the news was there, but she wasn’t happy. She called Noah, and told him that his life had finally turned around; he was getting his own tour. The call came just after Noah got pulled over. He was driving drunk, but Alex got behind the wheel before the cop got to the car.

At the funeral, Cassie approached Andy outside the church. She wanted her money or it would be his ass in the box next. She kissed him on the cheek while handing him a bullet. Wow. Brandi. Who’d have thought it? Everyone was all, I can’t believe he’s gone, and I was like, me neither. Star left a message for Maurice to forget about the track, so right away he called to drop it like it’s hot. As the pallbearers were taking the casket to the hearse, ICE came. Angel was one of the pallbearers, but they wouldn’t let him finish the task, dragging him out and cuffing him. When they were driving up, I thought it was the same guy who shot Jahil, there to finish the job. I wondered if that’s what the characters thought too. I have to add that the flower blanket on the casket was incredible, and quite colorful.

On the hair front, Queen Latifah spent most of the show in above-the-shoulder beachy waves with several colors of highlights, but for the funeral, she had long, dark curls with golden highlights, looking tragically romantic. Star won the hair-do wars though, in Rapunzel-like braids.

Next time, the finale – Star confronts Maurice, Noah is arrested, and Cassie and Carlotta draw guns on each other. That ought to be interesting.

🍷 I watched more of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: Secrets Revealed, and I just loved the Lisa and Ken segment. They were about to celebrate their 35th anniversary, and Lisa asked what if they just pretended to go away? Ken suggested they hire a chef and stay home. Lisa says there was no place she liked as much as Villa Rosa, and it reminded me of how much the Edies loved Grey Gardens. They agreed they wouldn’t marry each other today, which made me kind of sad, but as a whole, it seemed like their life is a fairytale. There was lots of Giggy, and more sadness over Pink Dog and Pikachu, who passed within a week of one another. Giggy also has a heart condition now, and Ken is talking about cloning him. I would. As always, Lisa was self-depreciating, but so beautiful. I really want them to adopt me. I wouldn’t take up that much space. There was also a nice segment where LisaR and Erika visited Camille at her beach house in Malibu, and had lunch on one of the decks. It was one of those pleasant meals you don’t get in the regular episodes. Another funny thing was when Teddi called her dad. John Mellencamp, asking if he remembered when she got a tattoo in eighth grade. He did, and he’s still mad.

🍌 Hmm…

What you get when you put “weekend getting closer” in google images.

Elf

KittyDetonator

FoodMeme

👉 There It Is…

WeekendSmell

May 15, 2018 – The Blanket Vanishes, Bad Guests in Capri, Veronica Gives Jeffrey a Way Out, BH Secrets, Ryan Helps a Realtor & Long Week

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Chase goes into the interrogation room. Carly is there, and he gives her coffee and her prescription bottle. Sonny wants a straight answer from Diane, but she says bail hearings aren’t always quick. Carly was arrested after the courts were closed. He asks what the charges are, and Dante says it depends on if Nelle and the baby survive.

Nelle wakes up and yells, no, Carly! Michael tells her she’s okay; she’s in the hospital. She grabs him, saying she was scared. he says it was just a dream.

Griff watches Ava rehearse for the Nurses’ Ball. Lucy tells him not to leak anything he sees. He tells Ava that she blew his mind, and Lucy is like, mind? Okay. Ava says she’s nervous, but Griff says she’ll be great. He’ll be the guy in back cheering and saying that’s his girlfriend. She says, please, no airhorns. He asks if this will do, and gives her a bouquet of roses.

Peter texts Valentin, are you sure A.D. under control? Valentin wonders wonder what’s going on with him.

Peter and Anna sit separately at the MetroCourt. Peter reads Valentin’s reply, situation under control. He thinks he’d better make sure. Anna writes, Henrik? Please respond. Peter approaches her table, and asks if it’s top secret. She’s a real live spy, and the impulse is to think anything she’s doing is a covert operation. She asks what business it is of his.

Andre meets Drew. Drew asks if he wants to make amends, and Andre says, if it’s possible. Drew wants Andre to make it possible.

Lucy tells Alexis to coordinate with her presenter. Finn says, hi.

Andre tells Drew if he knows of a way he can help, he’s all in. Drew says, make me, me again. Andre says they’ve discussed it before, and without the data, there’s nothing he can do. Even if he gets his hands on it, there’s no precedent. There’s no guarantee it would work twice. The human mind isn’t meant to withstand memory writing and rewriting.

Peter says Anna hasn’t forgiven him for refusing to plant a false story. He asks how she does it. Which ideals is she willing to sacrifice? What rules is she willing to break? She asks if he’s interviewing her, and has a hidden recorder. He says it came to his attention that Robert might have leaked something to Nina’s husband about Henrik. She and Maxie are his star employees, and their safety is paramount. Anna says she has a word of advice. Valentin has a jealous streak, and he should leave Nina to him. Maxie is her goddaughter, and she’d sooner die than let anything happen to her.

Griff tells Ava his flowers may be premature, but she’ll be inundated later, and he wanted his to be first. She tells him to keep his expectations nice and low. He says he believes in her, and she says it must be torture not waking up next to her. He says the hotel will do for now, but it’s definitely not home. She hopes he finds home soon. He asks if she wants to go to breakfast while Lucy is terrorizing someone else, but she’s late for an appointment. She says she’ll see him tonight. He says he can’t wait, and they kiss.

Sonny goes into the interrogation room, and Carly asks where Michael is. Sonny says he’s at the hospital. Diane asks for privacy, so Dante and Chase leave, but Jason stays. She asks, what happened? Nelle said Carly pushed her. Carly says Nelle is lying. The whole thing was a set-up.

Nelle tells Michael the nightmare felt real; did she say anything? Michael says, no, but she was upset. She says she felt like she was falling and had no control; there was nothing to grab on to. She put her hand over her belly to protect the baby. She starts to cry. Kim comes in, and asks how she’s feeling. Nelle takes Michael’s hand, and asks if the baby is going to be okay. Michael makes a worried face to rival Griff’s.

Alexis asks how Lucy roped Finn in. Finn says Lucy dropped Alexis’s name, telling him she’s getting the Port Charles Pioneer award. Lucy walks by with a camel. A live camel. Finn says Alexis is receiving the award for fighting social injustice, and she says she’s done a few pro bono cases. He says more than a few. She’s glad it’s giving her an excuse not to perform. She’ll just graciously collect her plaque, and everyone will clap, but he has to give them a reason why. He says if his introduction is underwhelming, he’ll make up for it on the dance floor – as long as her date doesn’t mind. She says she doesn’t have one. He says, in that case, does she want to go with him?

Still leading the camel, Lucy sees Valentin, and says they have time to run through his number. He says he’s good to go. Lucy says since everyone loved him last year, she’s inclined to believe it, but the stage manager might need to rehearse. He says he’ll see her tonight.

Peter tells Anna that he’s been trying to reach Robert to no avail; perhaps she could put them in touch.  Anna says if Robert isn’t available, it’s for a reason, but she’ll relay the message. He says it’s most appreciated. Peter leaves, and Griff comes in. Anna hugs him, and he says he didn’t know she was back. She says she’s been underwater. He says she has to come up for air some time, and asks if she’s still looking for Henrik.

At the station, Chase tells Dante the statements are consistent that Carly was the aggressor. She got in an argument with Ava about a gift, Nelle explained how the gift was chosen, and Carly claimed it was just to torment her. Carly also said the blanket was a replica of one Morgan had. The problem is, no blanket was located, and no one can attest it exists. Dante says no one knows what really happened except Nelle and Carly. He’s going to find answers.

Kim tells Nelle and Michael that the baby’s heartbeat is as strong as ever. There are no injuries to the baby; it’s just fine. Michael hugs Nelle. Ava sees, and she and Nelle lock eyes.

Diane asks Carly what she means by a set-up. Is she suggesting Nelle threw herself down the stairs? Carly says the fall was an accident, but everything leading up to it was deliberate. She saw the penguin mobile, and when she saw the blanket like her mom made for Morgan as a baby, she wanted to show it to Michael. Diane says no blanket was recovered. Is it possible she imagined it? Carly says, absolutely not. Jason looks at her.

Griff asks Anna if catching Henrik is worth what she’s putting herself through? She doesn’t know, but she’s getting closer. He says there are risks, and she says, acceptable risks. If she has the chance to alert him about Huntington’s disease, shouldn’t she. Wouldn’t he do that? He supposes he would. She asks if he wants breakfast, but a patient needs his attention. They can catch up at the Ball. He tells Anna that he loves her, and kisses her cheek.

Griff walks into Peter’s office, since there’s a bullet elevator that shoots him right there. He tells Peter that he needs to get out of Port Charles while he still can.

Drew tells Andre that he’s not letting Jason’s past rule his life. Andre says the best and safest way to deal with it is to accept it and keep moving. He has no way to restore Drew’s memories without the flash drive. Drew tells him to get Jason out of his head. Remove Jason’s memories, and he’ll deal with the rest.

Carly says she never even touched Nelle. She grabbed the blanket, and when Nelle grabbed it back, she fell. Sonny asks if the blanket is like the scarf, and Diane asks, what scarf? Jason explains how Carly found it on her desk, and Diane asks if he saw it. He says Nelle came back and took it. She worked for Carly, and knew the layout and how to avoid the cameras. Carly says Nelle set her up. Sonny says even if Nelle is responsible for the scarf, she couldn’t have taken the blanket. She was unconscious at the bottom of the stairs. Jason says someone else took it. They just need to figure out who.

Michael thanks Kim. Kim says she’d like to keep Nelle for another 24-hours to monitor her. Michael thought Nelle was fine, but Kim says it’s just a precaution. She leaves to order Nelle a room, and Michael asks if Nelle is okay. She says, yes, now that she knows the baby is okay. She asks him to get her some orange juice.

Dante asks Kim how the patient is doing. She says bruised, but okay, and the baby is healthy. There’s no indication of injury or distress.

Ava goes in to see Nelle. She says Nelle is looking hale and hardy after what she’s endured. She asks how the baby is doing, and Nelle says, well; no thanks to Carly. Ava says it was quite a shower. Nelle says it’s a blur, except for Carly pushing her; that’s crystal clear. It was terrifying how Carly came after her. Ava remarks that Nelle’s use of the blanket was calculating, but this couldn’t have been part of her original plan. Carly is up for two counts of attempted murder, and Michael has been there all night. All because of a blanket. She says, guess who has it now? and takes it out of her bag. That was slick. Ava must move pretty fast.

Jason says they need to go over who was at the Quartermaine’s. Diane asks to speak to Sonny privately, and Carly asks about what? Diane says they can go over the arraignment, while Carly talks to Jason. Carly says Diane doesn’t believe there was a blanket, but Diane says it doesn’t matter what she believes. What matters is what she can sell to a court of law.

Diane asks what Sonny thinks. Sonny thinks Carly is going through a breakdown; it’s been happening for months. She’s seen signs from Morgan that he’s not dead, and he thinks it’s her grief causing it. Diane says Jason believes her, and Sonny says if Carly wanted to jump off a cliff, saying she could fly, Jason would let her. Diane says it might come to that. If they can’t produce the blanket, Carly could talk herself into a conviction for attempted murder.

Carly tells Jason that they don’t believe her, but he does. He says it makes sense. Nelle knew where Morgan died. She did either made the calls or paid someone, and she carried out the rest. Carly says Nelle is crazy, but the hardest part is, her baby isn’t coming back. Jason hugs her.

At the hospital. Michael tells Dante the baby is okay. Dante asks if Nelle is conscious and lucid; he needs to talk to her. Michael says she’s still shaken up, but Dante needs a statement while it’s still fresh.

Ava says, lovely work. Nelle should consider opening an Etsy shop. She found it right where Carly said it dropped, and snuck it out while everyone was worried about Nelle. She says Diane is a great attorney, and would have a field day with it. Nelle tells her to wait, but Ava says, on second thought, she’ll hold on to it for safekeeping. She wouldn’t want Nelle to have to replace it. Nelle tells Ava to please give it to her, but Ava says she has enough to keep track of – like the photo of Griff’s DNA test. Dante and Michael come in, and just as fast as Ava snatched it in the first place. the blanket is back in her bag. Dante asks if Nelle thinks she’s up for questions. He’d like to clarify what happened before she fell.

Finn rehearses his introduction, and Alexis follows with her acceptance. Lucy says, hold everything, and tells herself, serenity now. She asks if this is how Alexis is making an entrance, and Alexis asks if she doesn’t like walking. Lucy says it’s boring, and Alexis suggests a triple axel. Lucy tells her she’s receiving an award on a magnificent stage, not looking for toilet paper in the grocery store. She should do some sashaying. Lucy demonstrates, and knocks Alexis’s papers all over. Finn picks them up, and sees Anna’s will.

On the phone, Anna says she’s trying to get in touch with Robert, and to make sure he gets the message.

Griff tells Peter that Anna is working with Jason. Peter thinks he has no reason to worry, unless Griff tells them. Griff says he needs to leave or come clean, or he might find himself at someone else’s mercy sooner than he thinks.

Valentin sees Griff leave Peter’s office. He asks Peter what the deal is, and Peter says Griff is trying to save his soul. Valentin doesn’t buy it, saying he’s way too close to Anna. Peter asks if Valentin is absolutely sure, and Valentin says he is, unless Griff told him otherwise. He asks what connection Peter has to Griff, and Peter says Griff knows who he really is. Valentin calls him an idiot, asking if he knows what he’s done. He’s screwed them both.

Nelle tells Dante everything was fine at first, then things got tense. Ava gave her a gift from her registry, a mobile with penguins. Nelle explains that newborns see better in black and white. She had no idea it would remind Carly of Morgan, but Carly thought it was deliberate, and said awful things. She got away to the nursery. Ava says Carly chased her off in tatters. Dante asks what happened when Carly found her, and Nelle says more of the same. Carly told her everyone was better off without her. She didn’t want to get the baby stressed, so she tried to get away. Carly caught her at the top of the stairs. She asks if they can finish later, but Dante says they’re almost done. Nelle continues, telling him that Carly grabbed her by the arms and shook her, screaming that she didn’t want Nelle to get her hands on her son, meaning Michael, and pushed her. Dante thanks her for her cooperation, and says, one more question. Carly mentioned a blanket was involved in the struggle at the top of the stairs. Nelle doesn’t know what she’s talking about; there was no blanket. Dante asks if she’s sure, and Ava tells him, if Nelle says there’s no blanket, there’s no blanket.

Jason tells Carly it’s going to be okay. They know it’s Nelle; they just have to prove it. Carly says Sonny is right. There’s no way Nelle could have gotten the blanket. Jason suggests maybe someone has it, and has no idea what they have. He says the blanket is real, the scarf is real, and so were the break-ins. Nelle left a trail somewhere. There has to be proof, and he’ll find it. Carly says Sonny thinks she’s going crazy. Jason says he sees her pain, and he’s grieving too. Carly asks if Jason can talk to him. He says he’ll try, but Sonny doesn’t trust his judgement when comes to her. Carly says, because he believes in her. He says he always will, and promises it will be okay (the word of the day).

Valentin asks Peter why he confided in Griff. Peter says he didn’t. He went to Griff for a Huntington’s disease test, and when Griff found out Faison was a carrier, he ran a DNA test without his permission.  He played on Griff’s sympathies for Maxie’s sake, promising to be a model, law-abiding citizen. He kept his end of the bargain. Valentin says he doesn’t realize how close Griff and Anna are. There’s no way he’s not going to tell her. Anna will be crushed when she realizes that Valentin knew all along. Peter suggests Valentin get rid of Anna like he did Robert.

Andre says Drew is asking him to erase everything he is, but Drew says just Jason’s memories. Andre says there’s no guarantee he’ll survive a second procedure intact. He doesn’t know if Drew’s memories are gone or just not accessible; it’s not that easy. Drew says if there’s a remote chance it will work, he has to do it.

Jason tells Sonny that Carly is okay. Sonny says she’s sick, but he loves her. He thinks she’s unraveling, and it’s best to take a step back. He doesn’t want this getting worse. Diane tells them that there’s not going to be an arraignment until tomorrow. The judge wants to give the police more time to investigate.

Nelle thinks she and Michael should talk about it, but Michael says, later; she needs rest. She says, fair enough, and tells him to try and have fun at the Nurses’ Ball. He says he’s not going. He’s staying with her, and he refuses to change his mind. Kim comes in, and tells Nelle she’ll be more comfortable in a regular room. She’ll be going to the Ball, but can be contacted if Nelle needs anything. Nelle says her favorite things are right there.

Chase tells Dante that the statements from the staff don’t contradict anything they’ve heard so far. Dante says, Nelle claims the same thing. Chase asks what’s their next move?

Diane tells Carly that there’s no arraignment until tomorrow, and Carly say she can make it one night. Dante says the baby is fine, and so is Nelle. Carly says, thank God, and Dante says it’s time for everyone to leave.

Ava says it’s a shame Nelle will miss her debut, but she has a good excuse. Nelle suggests having Griff record it. Ava tells her to stay warm. Hospital rooms can be cold; she should ask for an extra blanket. She leaves, and Nelle says she knows Michael doesn’t want to talk about it, but what does he think will happen to his mom?

Chase cuffs Carly, saying it’s standard procedure on counts of attempted murder. Diane doesn’t disagree, but says if the court best not infringe one iota on her client’s civil rights. Carly tells Sonny to get home. Josslyn is going to the Ball with Oscar, and he needs to coordinate with Kim. She ask him to tell Michael that she loves him and the baby. Chase leads her out.

Finn looks at the will for a moment, and gathers everything up. He asks Alexis what it’s going to be, a saunter or sashay? She thinks she’ll be safe with a stroll. He says he’s going with shimmying.

Anna gets an email from Henrik, accepting her invitation, and asking for a time and place. He says they have a lot of catching up to do.

Drew asks Peter if he’s seen Sam, and Peter says, not recently. Drew asks him to tell her that he’s looking for her. Peter asks if everything is okay, and Drew says he thinks he found a way to get back everything he lost.

On the phone, Valentin orders plane tickets for two adults and a child – one way. They’re not coming back.

Tomorrow, the Nurses’ Ball. Carla Hall from The Chew makes an appearance.

Below Deck Mediterranean

Adam is back? Why?

We start off docked in Naples. Hannah has also returned. Captain Sandy says they’re going to smash this season out of the park. Let’s hope they don’t smash the boat like those guys did last season on Below Deck the original. Chef Adam spent his off-time cooking in the woods, and has never felt like more of a chef. The captain tells us they have the potential to be great, which is why they’re back, but there’s no second chance after this second chance.

Bosun Conrad comes on board next. Followed by Kasey, the third stew. Lead deckhand Joao is next. He’s from Zimbabwe, and oddly enough, that’s where Hannah’s parents are from. Yachting was his only way out. Adam is jealous of Conrad’s name because it has rad in it. Sigh. Where is Chef Ben when I need him? Second stew Brooke arrives. It’s a small yachting world, as she’s worked with Hannah’s best friend. Hannah is hoping to be able to wake up without daggers in her back this season. Deckhands Jamie and Colin round out the crew.

Captain Sandy goes over the rules. She tells them not to be her first thought in the morning, or it means it will be their last day on the boat.

Adam says the stews are super cute, but so is having a job. Jamie says most people assume she’s a stew because she’s female. The crew gets the boat ready for the first guests. Conrad goes over things with the deckhands, telling them he praises in public, but gives critiques in private. Joao makes sure the deckhands know that he defers to Conrad if there’s a conflict of information. Everyone is shocked that Conrad is only twenty-three. He hates when people continually point out his age Hannah goes over the schedule with the stews. Her job is to make the boat run smoothly, and she tells them not to take it personally if she’s short with them. Brooke says she started dating an old friend, and it’s her first time away from him. Kasey says that she did pageants, but also has a psychology degree. That’s good. She’ll need it.

The captain calls Conrad, Adam, and Hannah to the bridge to go over the preference sheets. Nichelle is the primary, and owns a sports management firm. The guests are looking to surf and use the water toys. Captain Sandy says they’ll pick the guests up in Capri. She wants them wowed by the food and the service, and says they’re going to make it happen.

Kasey is puzzled by the ironing board. She lives at home, and it’s her first time doing laundry. She wants to prove that she’s more than the princess everyone thinks she is – even though she is. The crew changes into their whites.

Why don’t these guests look like they’re sports minded? I’m not a person who puts a lot of stock in appearances, but they look like rumpled messes. I hope the primary isn’t intending to hand out business cards. The introductions are made, and Captain Sandy says they’re going to smash it out of the park, because she’s stuck on baseball references. Hannah gives the tour. Jamie wonders if the guests have bricks in their luggage. Ha-ha! My father used to say that about my purse. Captain Sandy says if you’re a captain, and claim not to be nervous taking out a new boat with a new crew, you’re full of sh*t. Hannah makes cocktails, and One of the guests is fixated on getting some nuts to go with that. She keeps asking where her nuts are, and it’s killing all of us not to make jokes. Conrad can see Joao wants to be bosun, but he’s not yet.

Kasey gets seasick, and Hannah is now down a stew on the first day. Kasey explains the boat she’d previously been on, never left the dock. Geez, she might have explored her reaction to being on a moving boat before taking the job. The guest gripes about the nuts again, because it’s been a whole twenty-three minutes. In her interview, Hannah says, you’re not succumbing, bitch, so calm down. Seriously, she’s asked where they are like, once a minute. Even after the nuts come, there are complaints.

They drop anchor, and it’s lunchtime. Adam says it’s a new boat, a new crew, and a new him. The entrée is a coconut shrimp dish that looks amazing, but I’m not crazy about coconut being in anything except a dessert. The ladies tell Hannah that they want to meet the guests on another boat narby, so they can flirt, and Nichelle calls Hannah sweetheart, which I’m sure thrills her. The tender is loaded with champagne, and the guests depart. I’m hoping the other boat is filled with gay men. The other captain isn’t cool with them visiting, so they go back. One of the guests (henceforth known as Idiot) wants to “help” Colin dock, and Colin tries to be polite in telling her she can’t touch the equipment. In his interview, he tells us that if he had an artist draw a picture of the worst person in the world, it would be her.

As usual, the dinner table is beautiful, royal blue and golden yellow, with tiny lights and shiny objects. Adam makes Italian food. Idiot makes a face at the salad. Kasey doesn’t want to let everyone down, but wants to barf every single second. Mmm… pasta… Mmm… asparagus… Idiot says her dog eats food like this, and it’s unacceptable. Nichelle says it’s not a dinner presentation, and she doesn’t eat out of a bowl. This is killing me. Okay, I have to. She should eat out of bowl – on the floor. They demand to see Adam, and he’s met at the door by Idiot, who says she hates the food and wants to open the wine. She toddles off to Brooke and asks her to open it. Methinks she’s had enough already, as she doesn’t seem steady and keeps playing with her hair like a teenager. Nichelle says it’s more like a lunch service, and she’s shocked with the presentation. She tells Adam to never bring another dinner in a bowl. Idiot says it looks like slop, and they complain about not wanting starch. I’m going to have to say this too. It sure doesn’t look like they don’t eat starch. Idiot demands a grilled cheese with truffles. In his interview, Adam says the dish he made is traditionally served in a bowl, so give him a little respect. Non-traditionally, I agree with him.

Hannah asks what else they’d like, and they say spaghetti. In her interview, she says they remind her of The Three Bears. Nichelle says they’re on the boat for vacation, not to complain. So why are they complaining so much? Kasey tries to eat some bread. Hannah tells Adam the guests want pasta now, and he’s like, wtf? Omg, these people are the worst. The really sad part is, when they see themselves, they’ll probably think they were on point. Adam makes an awesome tuna tartare that I’m sure they’ll hate. He’d hoped to start off with a bang, but got bitching and complaining, and can’t be more sad.

Kasey is still upchucking at breakfast. Mmm… breakfast. In her interview, Kasey says she’s so sick, she physically can’t do the job. Hannah says if she can’t, they’ll have to get someone who can. Hannah asks the guests if they slept well. No surprise, they say, not at all. Nichelle wants a chat with the captain. She says everything is wrong, and it’s taking away from them having good time. They’re used to luxury vacations, and she wants to communicate her concerns.

Nichelle lumbers up to the bridge. She tells Captain Sandy that she’s not having a good time. Outside, thunder starts to rumble.

This season, disappointment over a beach picnic; lots of drinking; Kasey kisses Conrad; Brooke dances with Adam; Captain Sandy says service is sucking, she doesn’t want to babysit Conrad, and she’s ready to fire both Kasey and Conrad. It looks like rough seas ahead, both literally and figuratively.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Candace tries to wake Oscar. She dumps a bucket of water on him, but nothing. Just foam coming out of his mouth. She calls the bar and says there’s a situation. New bartender says he’ll be right back, and heads up to her room.

Candace says she gave him the usual cocktail Rocky gave her. She thinks it was rum. She asks if he knows what to do or not, and he says he does. He moves Oscar and Oscar spits up. The bartender takes a shot of adrenaline out of a kit, and it does the trick. He says she should be glad he was there, and Candace tells him get his arrogant ass out. Oscar heaves, and she tells him not to ruin things for her. He asks what she did. She asks him where they’re at and he gets it on the second try. He asks what the hell she gave him. She tells him to relax and she wants her money. He says drugging him isn’t the way to get it. She tells him get the hell out, and grabs up his clothing and bag. She tells him be glad he’s still breathing, and throws his stuff into the hallway. She slams the door behind him. He yells that she’ll regret this. She calls for someone to clean up.

Gia texts Candace saying Jim is there. Candace replies, telling her to make him the right drink and stay the night with him. Downstairs, Gia and Jim order drinks. He asks why she dragged him out of bed; what is she up to? She was hoping he was up to something, but he says he doesn’t have all night. She suggests they go to the room, and tells the bartender to send the drinks up. Candace calls down and grills the bartender. She shows up while he’s still talking to her, telling him not to roll his eyes and just do his job. He thanks her for the job. He says Rocky told him she once had a stable, and is starting again. She says she can trust Rocky, but doesn’t know if she can trust him. She says she’s nice, but coldblooded, and if he messes this up for her, she’ll gut him. He apologizes for being arrogant, and starts talking about a cop pulling him over and trying to feel him up. Candace says he talks too much, but asks what the cop’s name was. He doesn’t know. She describes Justin, and he asks if she knows him. She says she’ll keep the information in her back pocket.

In his room, Oscar gets only a blank screen on his laptop. He’s pissed. He calls the desk, and says he needs a new laptop. He can’t use an open computer. The concierge says the computer store doesn’t open until 9 am, and Oscar hangs up. He calls back for a car to take him in the morning. He swears he’ll kill Candace if she messed this up.

Rocky and the concierge talk.  The concierge says he has it figured out. Rocky says Candace has something to figure out too. She had him get Oscar’s passwords. He tells the concierge about Oscar stealing accounts, and the concierge tells him that Oscar just called about needing a new computer. Rocky asks if she did it, but he doesn’t know. Rocky says she’s up to something, and hopes she cuts him in on the deal. He got the numbers for her. The concierge tells him not to hold his breath. Rocky wants to find out what’s going on, and when he leaves, the concierge texts Kathryn.

Melissa sits in Hanna’s kitchen. Hanna asks if she’s seen Benny, but she hasn’t. Hanna asks if she slept okay, but she says she didn’t sleep. She thanks Hanna for letting her stay there. She’s sorry about last night; she was out of her head. Hanna says the woman she’s dealing with is out of her head every day and night. Melissa asks for coffee. Hanna says it’s not good for the baby, but Melissa says she doesn’t care. She says the baby isn’t wanted. She forced herself on Veronica’s gay, drunk son. She starts crying, and Hanna says she’s sorry. Hanna doesn’t know about an unwanted baby, but knows about an unwanted pregnancy. She tells Melissa when her baby was born, she was in love, and prays the same thing happens to her. Melissa says Hanna sounds like her mother. Hanna tells her that bad things sometimes just happen, but she has to keep the faith. She’s sorry Melissa is going through this, and Melissa says, not as sorry as she is. Hanna says, like it or not, she’s going to look out for her. She has to go to work, but Benny is there. She promises things will get better.

Erica tells David she made breakfast, but he doesn’t have time. He tells her it’s best if she stays there. He understands if she’s stir crazy, but this weekend they’ll get away. How about springing for a TV? Erika says she’s starting to think he likes her, and almost says I love you. She gets all, duuuh, and he says he understands. He tells her that he feels the same, but it scares him. She tells him to go handle his son, and they’ll talk about this stuff later.

Hanna arrives at Kathryn’s. Kathryn is glad to see her, and glad she’s coming back to work. Hanna thanks her, and says she doesn’t know where to start. Kathryn is concerned about Wyatt, and asks about Benny. Hanna says the police haven’t made a move, so she’s sitting tight. Kathryn knows what that’s like. She says Jim is back. Hanna isn’t asking about her love life, and Kathryn says it’s just a lie. She wants to know about Hanna’s date. Hanna says it was great, and tells her about seeing Stephanie Mills. She forgot what it was like to laugh. Kathryn understands, and asks if she’s going to see Derek again. Hanna says if he calls, and Kathryn says he will. He said he had a great time. Kathryn wishes she had a man, and Hanna says she’s married. Kathryn says, whatever, and asks Hanna to show her how to work the microwave.

When they get to the kitchen, Kathryn says, look who’s here, and jets. Derek tells Hanna it’s not his fault; Kathryn pretended the stove was broken. He moves in for a kiss, but Hanna asks what he’s doing. He says he was feeling it, and she says he’s sure of himself. He says he’s sure he likes her, and Hanna says, they just met, and she has work to do. Then she relents, but says they’re not doing this every day. He kisses her forehead. These two are too cute together.

Veronica tracks Melissa on the computer. She calls Benny. He debates, then picks up. He asks what’s up. She says Melissa is at his house; she knows these things. She says they’re all alike. They want to throw away a good woman who’s been good to them, for the next young thing. He came in her house, and disrespected her. Does he think she’s not getting back at him? Melissa is going to marry her son. Benny says her son is gay, and Veronica tells Benny not to talk to her about him. Benny says he knows he doesn’t want her, and she says, that is clear. She tells Benny that she will get back at him, and take care of him real good. She hangs up.

Melissa knocks on Benny’s door. She’s sorry about everything. He asks if she talked to her mother. She has to figure out somewhere to stay. She tells him that his mother said could stay there. Benny says he didn’t know she was pregnant, and thinks she should figure out what to do and where to go. She says she needs a day or two, and tells him that he can sleep with her. He says she’s not a whore, and he’s not going to sleep with her in exchange for a bed and shower. Melissa tells him that she didn’t say that, but his mother said she can stay, and it’s his mommy’s house.

Jeffrey is in the interrogation room, and Veronica walks in. Jeffrey calls for the guard. Veronica sits down, and says she can get him out; just sign the affidavit. I’m not sure how he’d do that, since his hands seems to be cuffed behind him. Jeffrey reads it, and tells her it says Benny did it – alone. She says, uh-huh, and she can make it stick. He asks if she’s serious. She says Benny buried the body and threatened him. Jeffrey says the body is inadmissible, and she says, for Candace. His testimony can put Benny away. He asks what she’s up to? He says Benny turned her down, didn’t he? He wouldn’t sleep with her. She gets it; Jeffrey wants him, but are they really going to fight over a man? He laughs, and says he turned her down; she’s too old for him. He’s not going to sign it, and Veronica says he’s protecting his man. Jeffrey tells her to stop it, but she says, he needs to stop it. He can get out. It just says he’s not the one who stabbed Quincy. They already know there are two perpetrators, and one is a male. He doesn’t even know Benny. Jeffrey says Benny was just trying to help Candace. She says Candace decided to destroy both of them. Does he want out? Then sign it, and stop whining like a little bitch. She tells him not to remind her why she locked him in there; just sign it. He says no, and she says, then he’ll stay in there, have a trial, and go to prison. It will be a year before he can get an appeal. He’ll be caged, and all because he killed a thug and refused to give up another one. He’s a damn fool. He tells her to wait. He’ll sign it. Wow.

Candace texts Gia, asking if Jim is still asleep. He is, and she tells Gia that she wants to see her. Gia throws on a robe, and goes to Candace’s room. Candace asks if he’s knocked out, and how much he was given. Gia says not enough to notice, but he’ll feel like he had a rough night. She tells Candace that he was funny, talking about his wife. Candace slaps her, saying, bitch, you like him. Gia says she doesn’t. Candace tells her that they will never respect her, and never really want her. They’ll make her feel special and wanted, but never be seen in the light of day with her. She can cry, whine, and beg, and they’ll drop her and leave her where they found her. All they are, are johns. They want the fantasy without strings. She says, learn that, whore. It’s what she is, and will always be. She tells Gia not to come in there talking about his wife It makes Candace want to slap the sh*t out of her. She tells Gia to learn quick, and Gia says she will. Candace asks how much she made, and Gia says $1500. Candace asks how she’s supposed to live on $1400? Gia says she’s sorry.

Candace gets a text saying $4 million has been deposited to her account. She tells Gia that she can have last night’s money; she’s done with this and her. She’s good. Gia begs, saying she’ll work harder, and Candace tells her get out. Gia says she’s got it, but Candace pushes her into the hallway. She calls Candace’s name, and says she’s sorry. Candace asks if she’s crazy, and says call her name one more damn time. Candace looks at her phone all happy.

Oscar gets back with a new laptop. He sees the money is still there, and breathes a sigh of relief.

Gia gets back to the room. Jim says he slept like a rock. Gia says she’s sorry. He asks for what, and she says, nothing. He asks where she went, and she says she got some breakfast. She’s crying, and Jim says the cereal must have made her sad. She tells him that she can order something if he wants. He says it’s okay, and asks her to come over to him. He puts her on his lap, and asks what is it? She cries and says she doesn’t want to do this anymore. She wishes she had a legit job; this is too stressful. Jim says he’ll make her feel better, and tells her to take her robe off. Gia says that doesn’t make her feel better. He says, okay, and gets up. She asks if he’s leaving, and he says it’s bad enough he has to put up with this bullsh*t at home, but here and he has to pay for it? He throws a bunch of money at her, and walks out. She sits on the bed and bawls.

In the hallway, Jim’s phone rings. Oscar says, it’s done. The money is wired. Because of the type of transaction, he wasn’t able to take out his fee, and asks if Jim can write a check – today. Jim says as soon as he gets home and confirms the money is in his account. Oscar asks if he could do that now, and Jim says he is, and hangs up. Will someone please tell me if we still call it hanging up? A huge downside of cell phones is you don’t get the satisfaction of slamming a receiver down if you’re pissed off.

At the Iron Bone, the dealer looks in the bathroom for Wyatt, who’s passed out in a stall. He tells Wyatt, let’s go, and kicks him. He says it’s after nine; time for his money. Wyatt stumbles out, and they go to the ATM. Wyatt puts in his card and PIN. He asks if it’s working, and the dealer says, yeah; try it again. Wyatt says, what the hell? and the dealer asks if he’s playing games. Wyatt tells him something’s wrong. The dealer pulls out a gun, and says he’s playing games.

Next time, Erika thinks she’s been made, the dealer tells Wyatt he’s dead, and Jim tells Kathryn a tart holds the key to making her case disappear.

🌴 I didn’t get a chance to see it tonight, but The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: Secrets Revealed is in rotation on Bravo. I love the Secrets shows because they’re more lighthearted, and we often see clips that are better than the scenes from the actual show.

💲 On Sell It Like Serhant, Ryan helped Erick, a rental agent who works at UnDorm, an agency that focuses on first apartments for college students. Erick once had a top spot, but a rival has been trying to steal his listings and clients. New guy Collin flirts with clients, and also has the dreaded, and now outdated, man bun. Erick needed to be what he was, or he was going to be out of a job.  Ryan needed to loosen Erick up, and get him to stop taking himself so seriously. I thought Erick needed to stop saying actually so much. Ryan observed Erick in action (or not), and discovered he was pushy, but lacked energy. He was also chewing gum, which Ryan told him was rude. I’m a huge fan of gum, but even I know that. I had the misfortune of seeing myself in an audience on TV while I was chomping on a piece, and it’s decidedly unattractive. Ryan suggested Erick ask the clients questions about themselves, and engage in energetic, cool conversation. He also put Erick through more acting school exercises, like making animal noises, and sent in a ringer pretending to be a client. Erick got his game together, but his four-hour commute (two, each way) seemed to be the real stumbling block. Erick’s boss told Ryan that Erick was again his loose, happy self, but he wasn’t sure how things would go for the rest of the year. He asked Ryan what he thought about Erick’s productivity long term, and Ryan felt he should move back to the city. He said it wasn’t his normal practice to tell anyone where to live, but the commute was cramping Erick’s style. He took the liberty of hunting down Erick’s old apartment – the same one he had when he was crushing it. Erick was thrilled to be back in Manhattan, and went from getting less than one rental every three days, to getting three in one afternoon. Next time, an ex-lawyer has switched jobs to find happiness selling formal gowns, and Ryan tries on dresses.

😵 It’s Already a Long Week…

WeekLong

TuesdayOnly

WeekFine

May 14, 2018 – Valentin & Peter Have a Moment, More Vanderpump Reunion, a Speck of Potomac & Lois Has Joined Superman

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Sonny tells Jason there is a body; the money clip proves it. He yells at Jason to dig, but Jason insists there’s no body. Sonny is getting a mite testy.

Jordan and Anna go to the Floating Rib, which has been redecorated, and has sort of a Western feel. Jordan thinks Curtis will like it, because it’s reminiscent of Baltimore. Distracted, Anna keeps looking at her phone. Jordan asks if she’s expecting to hear from someone.

Peter reads the email urging him not to trust Valentin. Valentin appears, asking if he’s disturbing Peter. Peter says he sent him a text demanding him to call, but face-to-face is better. Valentin says they finally agree on something. Peter asks what’s so important, and Valentin asks why he’s so on edge?

At the Floating Rib, Dante hopes the kitchen is ready for him and Michael. Michael is having a baby too, and it might not top the shower, but why should the girls have all the fun?

Brad tries to guess what’s in the baby bag. Monica tells him the fate of the nations doesn’t hinge on his choice, and just make one. He guesses it’s a toy, and Olivia says basically everything counts as toy if a child is under six months. He pulls out a spoon, which Olivia points out is for teething.

At the top of the stairs, Carly tells Nelle that Michael will know exactly what the blanket is, and to give it to her. Carly grabs at the blanket, but Nelle says she can’t have it, and grabs it back. She tumbles down the stairs. Everyone comes running out of the living room. Monica asks what Carly did.

Jordan asks Anna if there are any new leads on Henrik, but there’s nothing. Jordan tells Anna how Curtis proposed when she thought she might have cancer; then they found out she was all right. Anna is glad to hear that, and Jordan says, her too. Anna says she tries not to lecture friends when she knows they’re having a hard time, since it’s hypocritical, but she’s there if Jordan needs her. She asks if Jordan thinks Curtis proposed because they thought she was sick. Jordan knows he loves her, but highly doubts marriage was on his mind before he thought he’d lose her. Anna says a close call can make a person reassess their priorities. Jordan says, or it could be a hasty promise. Anna tells her there’s something to be said for living like they’re in their final days, leaving nothing unspoken. Jordan isn’t sure she’s ready for marriage. Anna asks if she loves Curtis, but their conversation is interrupted by Finn walking into the restaurant.

Peter says with Valentin, important is synonymous with bad news, but Valentin says, not this time. He’s convinced Anna to stop searching for Henrik. Peter says if she discovered he’s really Henrik, the best-case scenario would be prison, and the worst would be her leading Jason to his doorstep, and they know how he deals with his enemies.

Jason asks Sonny if he might have dug deeper. Sonny says, no, and he’s not wrong about the location; it was seared in his brain. Jason says it was his first job, and Skully told him to leave the gun. He would have done the same thing. Sonny says the gun jams him up. It has to be there. Jason thinks both the body and gun have been moved.

Chase sees Dante and Michael, and tells Dante that he’s starting to have second thoughts about their number in the Nurses Ball. Michael starts to say something, but Dante stops him. Chase thinks they should be rehearsing; he doesn’t want to look like an idiot. Dante says a wise woman once told him, you don’t have to look good, just be good. Chase leaves to practice, and Michael asks Dante what he’s doing to him. Dante tells Michael that he never said he was a saint.

Carly says it happened so fast; suddenly Nelle was just falling. Monica tells Olivia to keep her immobile, and says someone needs to call an ambulance. Bobbie brings Monica’s doctor bag. Monica asks if Nelle can hear her. Carly says she and the baby will be okay, and Monica tells Bobbie to take Carly out of there. Josslyn asks Carly what happened. Carly says she grabbed the blanket, and Nelle grabbed it back. Ava remembers asking Nelle how far she was going to take things with Carly, and Nelle saying by the time the shower was over, Carly would be exposed for the raving lunatic she is. Carly says the blanket was like Morgan’s. Nelle was taunting her with it, and just fell.

Valentin tell Peter Jason continues to be a threat, especially if he refuses to leave Port Charles. Peter says that’s not an option. He wonders why Anna would listen to Valentin, and Valentin says they have a history. They both trained at the WSB, and have had their ups and downs, but recently formed a truce with limited cooperation. Peter asks if Valentin is just telling him what he wants to hear, and Valentin says Peter has to trust him. Peter says there’s been a new development on his end, and there’s something he needs to know.

Jordan says she knows Anna’s relationship with Finn started as a cover, but there’s something more going on. Anna says, no, and it’s irrelevant; they’re not meant to be. Jordan asks what about living life like it’s her final days, and Anna says she walked into that. Jordan suggests she go over and just say hello. She’s a big girl and can sit by herself for a while. Anna walks toward the bar, but Alexis has gotten there first.

Chase sees Jordan, and says he’s starting to find his way around. She’s glad Dante is including him. He tells her not to worry. He’ll work on things at home, so he doesn’t hit any wrong notes. Jordan doesn’t even want to know.

Josslyn asks, what if Nelle is hurt or she loses the baby? The ambulance comes, and Ava says she’ll check on Leo and Avery to make sure they don’t get upset by the paramedics coming in. Monica says she’ll alert Kim, and Brad says he’ll ride in the ambulance. Josslyn says, no, she’ll go. She tells Carly that someone has to take are of Nelle. Monica tells Nelle to hang tight.

Dante asks if Michael is terrified, but Michael says it’s not his first time. He had custody once, and helped raise Teddy. He didn’t choose to be a father, and the circumstances aren’t ideal, but it doesn’t make him any less excited. Dante asks what about the baby’s mother? Michael thinks they’ve come to common ground, and might make a good team when it comes to raising a child.

Ava says the kids are sleeping like angels. She asks Olivia to watch Avery. She’s like to go to the hospital. She prays Nelle is all right. She leaves, and Carly says she has to call Michael. Bobbie tells her that Josslyn said she’d call, and they’ll meet them at the hospital. Carly says the baby has to be okay. Monica asks, what the hell happened? Bobbie says, now is not the not time; it was an accident. Monica says, was it? Carly has been trying to get Nelle out of Michael’s life from day one, and she’s been out of control all afternoon. She reminds Carly that she lost a baby on that same flight of stairs twenty years ago, and knows how dangerous it is to have an altercation on the top step. Bobbie suggests they go to the hospital, but Monica says they’re not going anywhere. She’s calling the police.

Jason tells Sonny that he had Spinelli do a search, and there’s been no mention of a body being found. Sonny says maybe someone is going to use it as leverage. Maybe Mike heard someone planning to use it against him. Jason says if they stay much longer, they’ll have to answer questions they don’t want to.

Peter tells Valentin that he just had a talk with Sam. He thought he could use her impending divorce to drive her out of Aurora, but she wanted to stay on. Maybe it will work in his favor. While she’s out looking for Henrik, he’ll be in her backyard. Valentin tells him not to trust anyone. Peter says, except for him, and Valentin says, of course.

Anna goes up to the bar, telling Alexis and Finn that she hopes she’s not interrupting; she’s just getting drinks. Finn says the place looks great, and it’s more relaxed. Anna says Felicia did a good job. Chase bumps into Finn, who says, twice in one day. Chase tells him to dial down the paranoia. He’s not following Finn. Alexis thinks maybe they should move. Chase gets a call.

Dante tells Michael that he saw him and Nelle, and they seem to be enthusiastic to be parenting. Chase tells Dante that he got a 415 called at the Quartermaines. Dante says, assault. Josslyn calls Michael, telling him that he needs to come to GH – now. He asks if she’s okay, but she says, it’s not her; it’s Nelle.

Brad tells Lucas that Nelle hasn’t regained consciousness. Lucas calls for a bunch of medical stuff, and Deanna says she’s on it. Josslyn comes in, and Nelle starts to wake up. Lucas tells her try not to move. She asks if the baby is okay, and Josslyn asks too.

Jordan tells Finn she noticed the tension. He says he knows she and Anna are close. She says she was actually talking about Chase, but go ahead. She’s all ears.

Alexis asks for sparkling water, and whatever Anna would like, adding she has this. Anna asks what’s with Finn and Chase? Alexis doesn’t get it either, but doesn’t think it’s her place to interfere with Finn’s relationship with his brother. Anna says, Finn has a brother? Alexis says, half-brother. He didn’t tell her?

Valentin asks if there’s something Peter wants to say. It pains Peter to admit it, but Valentin has a point; the walls are closing in on him. Valentin says he’ll help with deflecting Anna and Sam. Peter asks what he did to deserve Valentin’s friendship? Valentin says he’s seen himself in Peter. They both know what it’s like, making their way without an ethical or moral reference point; the judgement of the world, and everybody pointing fingers without understanding the circumstances, or what drives them. Peter confesses that without Valentin, he’d be quite alone. He’s thankful for the support, but he’s gotten more out of the friendship than Valentin has. Why?

Carly says they should be at the hospital, but Bobbie tells her if she leaves before the police get there, it will just escalate things. Chase arrives, saying he got a report that there was an assault. Carly says it was an accident, and Bobbie tells him that Nelle fell. He asks if anyone saw it. Carly says she was with her. They had an argument, and she lost her balance. Monica says no one knows what happened. They hated each other, and lately Carly has been making Nelle’s life difficult. She was badgering her at the party. Carly admits to being upset, but she would never push her, Chase asks if anyone else saw, but Bobbie says, no. He asks who helped, and Olivia guesses she got to Nelle first. Chase realizes she’s Dante’s mom, and asks if she witnessed anything, like Carly badgering Nelle.

Josslyn asks again if the baby will be okay. Michael comes in, and asks if Nelle is okay. Lucas says she’s in and out of consciousness. She got hit in the head pretty hard, and he’s ordered some tests. Dante shows up, and asks what happened. Nelle says she fell down the stairs. Michael asks if someone did this too her, and she says, Carly pushed her. Everyone is like, whoa.

Jason asks Sonny if he thinks it’s possible Mike is involved. Sonny says there are people in Brooklyn who have long memories, and Mike was definitely trying to warn him. He’ll ask Mike again. He doesn’t feel good about it, but it’s life or death. Hopefully, Mike is having a good day, and knows what he’s talking about. Sonny thanks Jason for dropping everything. Jason says he’ll always have Sonny’s back.

Valentin tells Peter they’re friends. Peter says Valentin has been there his whole life. Valentin says when saw how Faison treated him, he wanted to help. Until he had Charlotte, he never thought he’d have a child, but he was fortunate to mentor Peter. He was a shy, unloved boy, and turned into a strong, successful man. It meant something; he’s proud of him. Peter says he’s lucky to have him, but if he’s about to advise him to leave Port Charles, don’t. They’re having a moment; don’t ruin it. Valentin asks if he’s sure there’s not something else on his mind, but Peter says, that’s it. He’ll find a way to deal with Sam. Valentin says he’ll be in touch. When Valentin is gone, Peter goes back to his computer, and replies to the email.

Finn asks where he should start, and Jordan says, from the beginning. Anna comes back with the drinks. She mouths that she wants to talk to Finn, and Jordan tells her to take all the time she needs. Finn says she has good friends. Anna says, he has a brother; he never told her. He says it never came up. He guesses they both have secrets, and tells her to have a great night. As he walks away, her phone dings. The email says, if you really are my mother, prove it

Michael tells Nelle that she’s confused. His mom would never do that. She’d never hurt Nelle or the baby. Nelle says, she was so angry, and Josslyn says, she was pretty upset. Ava arrives, and says it was partially her fault. She had the audacity to give Nelle a mobile with penguins on it. Carly became unhinged. She went upstairs to look for Nelle, and the next thing, Nelle was at the bottom of the staircase with Carly over her. Dante says, she pushed Nelle on purpose? Nelle says, yes; she wanted her to fall. Michael says it doesn’t make sense. He asks Josslyn, what the hell happened?  Lucas says, everyone out. He’s going to do a CT scan. Only Michael can stay.

Outside, Josslyn asks Dante, what if they’re not okay? He hugs her.

Olivia tells Chase it was a family gathering; families get heated. She doesn’t remember what was said; there was a lot going on. Chase asks if she’s willing to put her statement on record. She says Carly’s son, Morgan, was killed a couple of years ago. She might have heard Carly say she didn’t want Nelle to say his name, but Nelle was using as a way to hurt Carly. Tempers were flying all over before anyone fell. Carly says Nelle made a blanket that looked like the one Morgan has as a baby, and was torturing her with it. She grabbed the blanket, and Nelle grabbed it back. Anyone claiming to know anything wasn’t there. Chase leaves the room, and Olivia says she didn’t mean to throw Carly under the bus. Monica asks why she’s apologizing. Her great-grandchild is fighting for its life, and Carly was furious at Nelle. Chase comes back in and asks where the blanket is. Carly says it dropped when Nelle fell, but he says there’s no blanket.

Anna sits at a table with Jordan. She reads the email, and replies.

Peter’s laptop chimes. He sees the reply – your birthday is June 13, 1976 (which makes him older than I thought he was). Please meet with me.

Jason says possibly Spinelli missed something, Sonny hates admitting it, but Spinelli doesn’t miss a beat. He’ll talk to his dad, and let Jason know what he comes up with. He tells Jason to get some rest. Jason says nobody has been digging there for years. If the body was moved, it was a while ago. No one has used it against him, so maybe nobody will. Sonny hopes so. Jason leaves. Sonny calls Carly gets voicemail.

Carly tells Chase maybe the blanket fell. He says he checked everywhere. Carly says she didn’t make it up. Nelle crocheted a blanket like Morgan’s, so she could mess with her. Josslyn asked her to talk to Nelle, and she found her in the nursery, where she was pretending to cry. Nelle has been tormenting her for months, hinting that Morgan is still alive – the phone calls, the things that happened at the house – they’re all Nelle. She’s not making it up. They know who Nelle is, and she’ll do anything to get her hands on Michael. Carly is never going to let that happen. She says she’s not staying one more second. She’s going to the hospital, where Michael needs her. Chase says he has no grounds to hold her until he gets a statement from the victim. She opens the door, and Dante is there.

Michael tells Nelle that he’s sorry it happened to her. He’s going to make things right. Everything will be okay. Their baby is strong, and hanging in there. No matter what, he’s by her side. He’s not going anywhere.

Carly asks what Dante is doing there, and how Nelle is. He says Lucas is running tests. Nelle is in and out of consciousness, but was awake enough to give her account. She says Carly pushed her. Monica says, this changes things. Dante is sorry, but he has to place Carly under arrest.

Tomorrow, Andre tells Drew he can’t get the memories without the flash drive, Griff tells Peter to get out of Port Charles while he still can, and Carly tells Sonny that Nelle set her up.

Vanderpump Rules – The Reunion – Part Two

When we last left, Jax was ranting and raving about Scheana not calling him when his father died, and she ran off to get her eyelashes re-glued. Andy says Scheana did text him, and texted Brittany every day. She comes back, and Andy asks if she’s okay. She says, no, but she’s a professional. A professional what?

Lala’s boyfriend is the next topic. Andy asks if he was married when they started dating, and she says he was legally separated, so she doesn’t see where she did anything wrong. With a show of hands, we see the entire cast has met him, and they all claim he’s very charming. Lala’s boyfriend hangs with Martin Scorsese, who apparently loves the show. I literally lol when Tom suggests it inspires his work. Lala talks about the gifts she gets, but says she contributes past the cap on her rent, and also toward the leased cars. That’s right. Cars. As in more than one. She says they call him a sugar daddy, but James gets his rent paid by a dude. James says he basically shares an apartment where he sleeps on the couch, but apologies for being hypocritical. We see a clip of roommate Paul, who has a cute little dog. Andy asks what about James’s fat, old man comment, referring to Lala’s man, and he says he’s apologized for that, but the group gets on him for doing it over and over. Lala tells him that he’s dismissed.

Andy asks if the purpose of the Eff-Jax party was to cheer Brittany up or bug Jax? Brittany is glad the girls were there for her, and Jax says as hated as he’s been, he’s glad she has them too. Andy asks about Jax saying it’s his relationship, and they should stay out of it. Kristen says it’s bullsh*t because he wants them to shut up, but it’s their business because they care. Jax swears he only slept with Faith once, although Faith says differently. Lisa thinks it was premeditated to get herself on the show. Andy asks if Lala regrets playing the tape for Brittany, but she says Brittany wanted to hear it. Tom doesn’t think the party was the right time to do it.

Andy asks if Katie regrets being hard on Lala, and she says she does. Lala says when someone attacks you, it’s easier to forgive them than when they attack someone you care about. Andy says Scheana seemed angry that Lala made up with Katie, and Scheana says it felt fake. Well, Scheana ought to know. A viewer asks why she felt the need to call out Katie, and Scheana says Lala was one of her closest friends. Katie questions her intentions, and Scheana says, Katie and Lala are best friends now; so they’re welcome. Lala suggests she not throw around the term best friends. Katie is asked if she believes Schwartz didn’t remember kissing the girl in Vegas. She does, and he says he was utterly hammered, and sabotaging his relationship in the most cowardly way. Jax can relate. He’s glad he wasn’t in the hot seat, but wishes it had been something else that unseated him. Andy asks how Katie got over it so quickly. She says she looked at bigger picture. Life is short; move on if you can. James says it’s another level when you’re married, but thinks Katie forgave too easy. Schwartz says he wanted to click his heels and disappear; he felt like a possum’s pr*ck. This brings the conversation to a mini halt, and he say he was watching Smokey and the Bandit. Andy asks if he considered not drinking. Schwarz says it’s not every night, but when he drinks, he drinks hard. We flash back to one of his blackout nights Mexico. Katie says it’s concerning because anything could happen, but he’s been handling himself well. Tom says Schwartz has a hard time turning down shots. Lisa says she would sever a relationship with a partner who was getting blackout drunk. She tells him this isn’t going to happen in the new restaurant.

Andy brings up everyone’s favorite national holiday – Stassi’s birthday. She created this elaborate costume party, and Patrick didn’t bother dressing up. Unless we want to count his man bun. Andy talks about her blowing Katie off, and asks if Patrick’s presence played into her mind. She says she was wasted and stressed, trying to make everyone happy and make him happy. Andy says Kristen and Katie didn’t run after her this time. Katie says when they came back to the friendship, she’d decided it was going to be different, including not coddling Stassi. Kristen says she acted like an asshole, so she was treated like one. Stassi says she misses the days when they ran after her.

The guys’ hair-dos are debated. Andy asks why Lisa gave James another chance. She thought it was time, and says he’s been doing well. He asks if she has any reticence about the name of his event – See You Next Tuesday – and she says she has a sense of humor. I actually think it’s amusing too, although if you call me that word, you’d best be ready for a crack across the face. Lisa says, in her London days, James’s father was the man about town. He managed George Michael, who was also James’s godfather. James says they spent holidays with him when James was a kid. Andy says he’d read when George passed away, he gave money to his godchildren, and asks if James got any. Rather than telling Andy this is possibly the rudest question ever, James says it’s still in the works. Andy asks why his father’s visit was so emotional, and James says his father is his best friend, and it’s been a long road. Lisa says what James’s parents have through has been tough, and it’s taken its toll on James. Kristen says it was hard to watch. She felt like there was a lot of pressure on the kids when it wasn’t their problem.

Andy says Jax pissed off Scheana when he said Rob didn’t love her, and asks if she retaliated by setting Brittany up with Adam. She says Brittany and Jax are still together (why do they keep reminding me?), and she was just introducing Adam to the group; she didn’t suggest cheating. Stassi tells Scheana she said it on camera, Jax messed with her relationship, and she was going to mess with his. Jax says Adam is a nice guy and was polite about it. Probably because he was concerned Jax might throw down his sweater and try to fight him. Jax says he thought Scheana was a friend, and Scheana says she’s always made it clear she would choose Brittany if he as in the wrong. Lala says no one was bringing in a guy to swoop Brittany up. Brittany says she knew it was to boost her confidence. Scheana says she wanted Brittany to see there were other guys out there, when Jax was treating her like sh*t.

Billie Lee joins the group. She grew up in either Indiana or India. She has that Valley Girl way of talking – like Scheana, but not as nerve-jangling – and transitioned when she came to LA. She was in the awkward stage, and had hard time getting a job. We learn that if you apply for a restaurant position in LA, a headshot is required. Andy says Billie seemed welcomed at SUR, and she says they’re family now. Everyone compliments her, saying she’s nice, kind, and has amazing energy. Andy asks what the shopping process for a vagina is like. Lisa wonders if shopping is the right word, and Lala tells her it’s like shopping for a Chanel bag – you know when it’s right. Billie says she looked at porn. Lisa says those are edited, and Billie says she wanted a pretty, edited vagina. Why not? Andy asks about her first impression of Stassi, and Billie says she was nice (the word of the night). He brings up Ariana saying she hoped that Billie schooled Stassi’s privileged, white ass, and Ariana says it was because she didn’t know she was ignorant. This was in reference to Stassi saying she was tired of “those people” politicizing awards shows. It’s actually unclear as to who she meant by “those people,” but if she meant the Hollywood elite, I have to agree with her. Andy asks Ariana if she thinks Stassi is a bigot, and Ariana says, no, and she never did. She also knew Billie could handle it int the best way possible. Andy asks Lisa about being on Stassi’s podcast, and Lisa says she’d had a few drinks first. Andy talks about Billie going out with Jeremy, and Billie says they “hang out.” Andy asks why Kristen thought their date should be in a public place, and Kristen says she thought Jeremy just wanted to bang Billie. She’s seen him with other girls. Andy says Stassi called him creepy, and Stassi says most guys have their creepy moments, and the wedding was one of his. We flash back to that, and again, Stassi and I are in agreement. Lisa says they put a damper on the date for Billie, and Stassi says she had no idea she would hurt Billie’s feelings and wishes she’d said something. Billie says she was thrown off. She’d never gotten a creepy vibe. Andy asks if her dating life has improved since the show, but that’s a no. Andy thinks it will happen, and we bid Billie goodbye.

Jax going to Reiki is next. Andy asks if the tapping works, and we see a clip of this stupidity. Right away, Stassi is like, nope, and Lisa says Kelsey was feeding his ego. Stassi says Kelsey told him to leave Brittany, without even knowing her or what was going on. Jax conveniently doesn’t remember telling Kelsey, love you, when signing off on the phone. Andy says it was stunning to watch him set out croissants and incense – although Andy says incest, which gets quite a reaction from everyone. He corrects it, and I wonder wtf kind of slip was that? Jax insists there was nothing sexual about it, and everyone calls bullsh*t. Andy asks why he let the Reiki specialist use his real name (Jason), and not his girlfriend? He asks if Brittany felt threatened, and she says she didn’t think anything at the time, but watching it, she could see they had googly eyes with heart emojis popping out of them. Andy asks Kristen why she flew Brittany’s family out, and Kristen says Brittany kept wanting her mom. She was afraid Brittany would go home and not come back. Andy asks if Jax was more irritated because he was blindsided,or because he had to face the family, and Jax says he didn’t want everyone involved. He thought that was messed up, and caused their decisions to be influenced by everyone else. Jax’s criticism of Brittany is brought up, and Jax admits he found cowardly reasons to argue, no matter what was going on. Brittany says she knows she didn’t deserve any of it. Lisa is surprised Brittany’s mom forgave Jax. Brittany says she was raised to see the best in everyone. Some people think it’s a bad thing, but she’s proud of that quality. Better to be happy and positive than have resentment.

Andy says this season Lala had a goal in uniting women, and asks what her definition of feminism is. She says there’s no one way to be a feminist. For her, it’s letting it all hang out. Lisa loves her, but doesn’t quite thinks that’s feminism. She’s talked openly about a BJ for jewelry, so it’s an oxymoron. Andy says she does drive a car paid for by her boyfriend, and has body shamed others. He asks how that fits in with her brand of girl power. Lala says when she feels attacked, she goes on the attack. James interrupts, and she says she’s speaking. Lala says she never considered herself a feminist; she just wants to give power to the p*ssy. Ariana thinks everyone should do what they want with what they have. Brittany says confidence is important. When she gained weight, it was hard. They need to support, lift each other up, and never judge. You don’t know what someone is going through. Preach it, sister! Jax says, hashtag metoo, and everyone is like, no, that’s not about this. He says he thought it was for women power. Andy says he’ll explain it at lunch.

Andy says Katie is dealing with anger differently. She says she took inventory, and became more loving and accepting of herself, and in turn, it became easier to love others. Schwartz says, for long time, she was a nightmare of a human being. Lisa asks if he was perfect, and he says, of course not. Andy asks about Katie’s accident, and she says she was on a roof with some friends. She sat on the edge of a skylight, and fell twenty-five feet. Note to self: no sitting on skylights. She had a lot of broken bones, and hematoma. We look at the video she made shortly afterward. Andy says it’s hard to watch. Katie says she hadn’t seen it in a long time. She thinks it affected her anger issues 100%, but didn’t want to talk about it. Schwartz says she was simultaneously fragile and resilient. Lisa says she never played the victim, and barely mentioned it. She’s happy that Katie finally shared it. Katie says she had a bad relationship with herself, and her body, and it affected her other relationships. She did a lot of work on herself, and can’t be happier. Schwartz says she regained full control over who he knew she was. We flash back to her telling him that it feels good to be herself. Ariana says it was the most moving thing she’s ever seen. Schwartz says it was a turning point. Katie thanks him for not giving up on her, and he thanks her for not giving up on him. Andy thanks them both for sharing.

Next time, the reunion concludes, Tom gets angry with Stassi, the James and Kristen rumor is discussed, and Jax is in the hot seat again.

🏃 Fastest Recap Ever

On Real Housewives of Potomac, several of the girls did some fly fishing , Karen admitted her husband asked for a divorce, and Ashley’s husband said it’s either her mother or him. I’m also loving Karen’s blonde wig hair.

😢 Goodbye, Lois…

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Superman

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May 8, 2018 – Franco Has the Solution, Veronica Tosses Melissa Out, the Beverly Hills Reunion Ends, Ps & Qs

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Drew boxes with the bag as he thinks about his last conversation with Sam. Jason walks into the gym.

Maxie tells someone it’s the standard ad rate is, and to tell her if she doesn’t like it, she can take a hike. She’s not afraid of Erica Kane. Ha-ha! She tells Sam she had a minor breakthrough. She’s realized that she can’t let her anger over Nathan rule her life, and stand in the way of other opportunities. Sam asks if that includes her friendship with Lulu.

Lulu types an email reply to Henrik’s mother at the MetroCourt. She says she’s Interested in learning more, starting with her name. Anna leaves a message for Robert on the phone.

Maxie asks since when is Sam Lulu’s cheerleader. She says, the plug on the friendship has been pulled – the end. Sam says, so that’s it? Maxie says she thought Sam was quitting Aurora, and asks if she’s back so soon. Sam says she never left; the timing was wrong. Maxie asks, what changed her mind?

Peter catches Valentin rooting through his office. He’s looking for any more incriminating evidence. Peter says nothing happened that can’t be handled. Valentin can say the same for Robert. They won’t have to worry about him again. He tells Peter that Sam has joined forces with Curtis to investigate him. She was once married to Jason, and there’s a good chance Peter’s house of cards will come crashing down around him.

Lulu thanks Anna for meeting with her. She needs to talk to Anna about Henrik. She heard from a woman claiming to be his mother.

Peter tells Valentin that Sam needs him to run the company. Valentin says he kept Jason prisoner for five years, and Peter says he saved Jason’s life. Valentin says that’s open to interpretation. Peter says this is getting tedious, but Valentin says he’s trying to protect him. Peter tells him then he should open his eyes. Robert isn’t the only threat. Anna needs to be dealt with.

Sam tells Maxie that she needs to check in with Nina. She’s still in the official capacity of co-CEO for now. Maxie says Sam claimed she wanted to move on, but she’s still in the middle of it. Sam says it has nothing to do with work, but about her. Maxie thought she was taking charge of her life, and wanted a clean break. Sam says clean breaks are few and far between, and she has unfinished business.

Jason tells Drew he can come back, but Drew says there’s enough room for two at the gym. He’s surprised he hasn’t seen Jason there before. Jason says he wants to work out, not fight. Drew says he and Sam are divorcing, but he probably knew that when Sam asked him to move back in. Jason says he and Sam aren’t together. Drew asks what happened in Switzerland. Jason tells him about getting into Faison’s safe deposit box, but there were no letters and no flash drive; he’s sorry. Drew doesn’t want sympathy. He doesn’t want anything from Jason at all.

Franco arrives home. Elizabeth was worried something happened. He tells her it took longer than he thought to wrangle Jim’s survivors. Elizabeth wonders if he needs space, but Franco says, no. He wants to talk. He has a lot to talk about. More than she can imagine.

Olivia-Q asks if she can get Alexis something to drink – tea, or bleach maybe? Alexis says Ned told her it would be brief. Olivia says he thought they should hash it out there, rather than her place of business; he’s considerate that way, unlike her. Ned joins them, and asks hypothetically speaking, if Alexis succeeds, the city’s taxpayers will have to foot the bill. It will come out of the pockets of the very friends and neighbors she’s fighting for, but it won’t come to that. Alexis asks if he’s ready to deal, but he says she’ll never file it. She already knows she’ll lose.

Franco tells Elizabeth that Steve worked for Jim as his right-hand man. After all these years, he was still connected to Jim. Elizabeth says it shows the horrifying power monsters like him have. He says Steve thought he’d never break free; he didn’t have someone to support him. She’s made a difference in his life. He shows her some documents, and she asks if they’re what she thinks they are, and what is he going to do with them?

Ned tells Alexis that the people voted for redevelopment. She says she didn’t see illegal fracking on the ballot. Ned says no one knew what Jim was doing. Alexis suggest he practice saying that. Him not knowing what his chief backer was doing, when he should have, won’t go over well with the public. Olivia says it’s all about the public, just like the lawsuit over her breastfeeding. Alexis says the people don’t have homes. Ned says she’s doing it to stay in the public eye, so she can make another run for mayor.

Lulu reads her reply to Anna. Anna says they have no intel on Henrik’s mother; even Obrecht didn’t know her name. The email couldn’t be more vague. Lulu says she has another email; someone claiming to be Henrik. Anna asks if Dante knows what’s going on. Lulu says if it really is Henrik, she doesn’t want him to go underground. Anna asks if she thinks he’ll agree to meet, and Lulu says he was adamant about telling his side of the story. She doesn’t want to screw this up and cause another tragedy. She needs guidance. Maxie comes into the MetroCourt.

Sam visits Nina’s office. Nina hopes her trip was relaxing, and Sam says it was definitely worthwhile. She asks if Nina is okay, and Nina says Crimson is running on all cylinders. She asks how Sam is dealing with everything, and Sam says she’s good. She tells Nina that they don’t have to be best friends, but they don’t have to be strangers either. She asks if she can talk to Nina. There’s something going on with Peter.

Valentin tells Peter that Anna isn’t a threat. Peter asks in what universe? She’s been gunning for him for months. She tried lure him out the night his father was shot; now they need to cover their tracks. Anna and Robert are a package deal; what one knows, the other does too. Whatever he did with Robert, he has to do the same with Anna, or Peter will do it for him. Valentin begins to stutter, telling Peter to leave Anna alone.

Maxie asks Anna if she and Lulu can have a minute, and Anna asks to borrow Lulu’s laptop. Maxie makes small talk about Lulu’s foot, and starts to leave. Lulu asks her to wait. She doesn’t want to give up on their friendship, and thinks Maxie feels the same way. She asks Maxie to tell her if she’s off-base, and she’ll leave her alone. She loves Maxie more than she misses her. Maxie wants to thank her and Dante for their donation to PC LEAF.

Nina tells Sam that she hired Curtis to investigate Peter. He told her that Sam found him in Peter’s office. Sam says they can’t cut her out, and Nina says she isn’t. She’s cutting the investigation.

Valentin tells Peter that one WSB agent disappearing, maybe, but not two. The whole agency will be looking. Peter says, better them than us. Valentin says he’s looked out for Peter since he was a child. He worked for Peter’s father when Peter was a schoolboy, desperate for attention and acceptance from his father. He was in the room when Peter invited Faison to his to drama club performance. His response was if his son wants him to watch him play make-believe, why travel? Peter says his father never showed up, but Valentin did. Valentin says he cares about Peter and always will. He saw himself in Peter. He knows what it’s like to be dropped into boarding school by a father preoccupied with more important things. Peter says Valentin taught him to think ahead, assess weaknesses, but exploit them only when necessary, and also not to be rash. Valentin says that’s why he has to forget Anna. Peter says Valentin is trying hard to protect her. What is she to him?

Jason tells Drew that he wanted to find the flash drive. Drew isn’t thrilled with remembering Jason’s memories. Jason says he doesn’t want to share his memories or anything else with Drew. Drew says he shares a daughter with Sam, and Jason says, whatever she decides. Drew snarks that he’s always noble. Sam was happy with him, until Jason fell from the sky and took over their lives.

Alexis asks if Ned thinks she’s a masochist. Olivia says it seems very personal, and Alexis says, of course. Her daughter and TJ are homeless, as well as a lot of her friends. Ned says he’s using all the resources he has, and Alexis says it’s not enough. It’s not about targeting anyone, but he looked the other way. Olivia suggests instead of suing the city, she should go after who’s responsible. Jim’s company has deep pockets. Alexis says the company will keep them in court for years and years. Ned says they’re providing emergency housing. Right now, they’re dealing with a crisis, and the lawsuit will create another one. Olivia says she won’t win; she can’t prove damages, and is going to lose. Alexis says maybe it will get the attention of the politicians padding their pockets with corporate greed. They should be working for the people, but they aren’t. They’re a disgrace to the voters, who will vote them out. Ned says she’s threatening to tear down the very city she wants to rebuild. Franco and Elizabeth walk in, and Franco says he has a way they can all win.

Elizabeth says that they told the housekeeper it was urgent, and she said to just come in. Ned says they’re working on something right now. Franco says going to court won’t fix it, but this might. He shows them the documents. Ned says it’s a certificate of transfer to the city from Jim’s company. All of the assets have been signed over to the city of Port Charles. I don’t think this would be possible, since they’re in bankruptcy, but I’ll let it slide.

Peter tells Valentin that his father had a fatal weakness for Anna, and he does too. Valentin doesn’t appreciate the comparison. He’s vulnerable to Anna, and so is Peter. If she fails to make contact with Robert, she’s going to work backwards to when he disappeared. It was just after he was at Windemere. Then who is she going to go after? Valentin says that’s why Peter needs to leave town. He has to assume a new identity. Peter says Valentin has made himself a prime suspect, and sooner or later, she’s coming after him. Then who is she going after? For both their sakes, Anna has to go.

Maxie leaves, and Anna returns to the table. Lulu says it might help Maxie if she got closure with Henrik. It’s one of the reasons she’s tempted to meet him. Anna tells her to be careful. The last thing she wants is for the events to spiral. Lulu says she’s too close. She thinks she might be seeing what she wants to. She needs someone objective with knowledge of Faison to see if the emails are legit. She asks Anna what she thinks.

Sam tells Nina that she got the impression the investigation was important. Nina says, it was. She wanted to uncover everything about Peter, especially his agenda for Maxie. She thought he had one, but everything checked out, except for a few blips. He had no permanent address, and the only information was on his resume, but it checked out. Sam says he could possibly be hiding something, but Nina says there are lots of reasons to cover a past. If it hadn’t been so public, she might want to do the same. He’s no longer suspect; not enough to alienate Maxie anyway. She likes him being around him, and talking to him. Sam understands. When Jason disappeared, she did the same thing. It was easier to be around people who didn’t know him. Nina thinks Maxie felt that way about her. She didn’t understand at the time, but gets it now. Nina tears up, saying it’s easier to lean on somebody whose heart isn’t broken as well. She hired Curtis, but the only thing he found was this. She shows Sam the scrapbook stuff, saying Peter made it for her and Maxie. Sam asks how Peter got access to Nathan’s personal memorabilia, and Nina explains that he contacted her mother and Obrecht. She thinks made it more for Maxie than her. It turns out that he’s just really a thoughtful guy.

Jason tells Drew that he’s not apologizing for coming back and living his life, but that doesn’t mean Drew can’t live his. Drew says he doesn’t know anything real before 2014, but he feels like he was there with Jason. He remembers how cold and dark it was after Faison shot him. He doesn’t want Jason’s baggage, but got it. Jason says Henrik is still out there, and might have the key to getting his memories back.

Valentin tells Peter that Anna is a beloved figure in Port Charles, surrounded family and friends. She’s as brilliant as Jason is relentless. There’s no way he can find that’s good enough to get them both. Jason will have questions. Jason killed Peter’s father for him. Peter asks if Valentin thinks that was an accident. He set the whole thing up. He knew one day he could point Jason in Faison’s direction and turn him loose. It worked as planned. Valentin isn’t the only one with a gift for logistics. Peter knows how it works. Valentin asks, does he?

Sam comes by Peter’s office. Valentin apologizes for the intrusion and leaves. Peter asks how Sam’s trip was, and she says, too short. He says he’s glad she stopped by again. He’d heard she came to his office when he wasn’t there, and is glad she caught him this time.

Lulu is having second thoughts about keeping Dante in the dark, but Anna says Henrik isn’t charged with anything. Dante will still insist on getting involved. Lulu says she’ll keep it quiet, but eventually come clean. Ever since she started working as a reporter, she’s been tripping over the same question. When is it okay to withhold information? He has a badge to hide behind. Anna thinks she’ll come through it okay.

Maxie visits Nina, who says she wanted to see her. Maxie asks if she’s in trouble, and if Erica Kane called about her. Nina asks why she would. Maxie says she drives a hard bargain, but Erica is a great person. Nina says Maxie isn’t in trouble, and Erica didn’t call. She wanted to show Maxie this. She indicates the scrapbook, and says Peter put it together for them.

Olivia says it’s a ton of money, but Alexis says not enough to rebuild the city. Ned says it’s enough to begin. Olivia reads that it was executed by Steven Blake, and Franco says he has control now that Jim is gone. Alexis says she’s stunned, but even more that it ended up in Franco’s lap. He says Steve had no idea what was going on, and when he found out, he wanted to compensate the people of Port Charles. Alexis asks why give it to him, and Franco says Steve wants nothing to do with Jim, but wants to compensate the people who were hurt because of his actions. Olivia says it’s a generous gesture, and Ned says they dodged a bullet. Alexis says, thanks to Franco, but Franco says Steve deserves the credit.

Nina tries to read a school paper Nathan wrote about her, and gets choked up. He says she’s a natty dresser, never yells at him, and he loves her. She says she’s framing it. Maxie says, see? Peter isn’t such a bad guy after all. Valentin eavesdrops, and does not look happy.

Anna tells Lulu the emails seem to be authentic. She can email Henrik for Lulu, but Lulu doesn’t want him to think he’s been duped. She’s worried he’ll shut down. She’ll email both of them, and let Anna know what happens. Anna asks her not to do anything else; she has to brief the WSB. Lulu is glad to be working with someone she can trust. Anna leaves, and looks at a copy of the emails on her phone in the hallway. Valentin calls her, and says he needs to see her. She says she’s not available, but he tells her it’s important and he can’t talk about it over the phone. She says she’s too busy right now, but they’ll catch up soon. She promises.

Sam says she did come looking for Peter, but he was in a meeting. Peter says she should feel lucky she missed it. He asks about the trip, and she tells him she went to Switzerland, asking if he’s ever been to Bern. He says several times, when he was working in Europe. Now, back to reality. He asks if she wanted anything specific. She says she came to his office to tell him she was leaving the company. He thinks that might make it easier for Drew, but she says she changed her mind. He asks if she’s not leaving, and she says he seems disappointed. Is there a reason he wants to get rid of her?

Jason says the bank manager was sure he saw a flash drive in one of the envelopes. Henrik paid someone to get them and deliver them to a drop site. Henrik has the flash drive, so if they find him, Drew has a chance of getting his memories back. Drew tells him to do what he has to. He’s tired of his fate being in someone else’s hands. He’s going to get what he needs his way. Jason tells him to do that.

Tomorrow, Oscar needs to tell Drew something, Julian tells Kim not to get in the middle, and Ava asks Nelle what’s in store for Carly.

The Haves and the Have Nots

Wyatt holds the bust above his head making Hulk noises. Jim asks if Wyatt is going to kill him; he saw it in his eyes. Wyatt puts the bust down, and Jim tells Kathryn he’s okay. He says Wyatt makes him sick. He tells Wyatt to try and stop him from saving his miserable ass, and flushes the drugs, saying his whole future down the drain. He asks if Wyatt was going to kill him, and Kathryn says they love him. Jim wants a moment. He tells Wyatt don’t ever almost kill anyone; either kill them or STFU. He wants Wyatt to apologize to his mother, but Kathryn thinks they should leave. Wyatt tells him to listen to her, and they go.

Benny separates Melissa and Veronica. Veronica says, get out of her damn house, and Melissa says, put her out. Veronica will pay for this baby and take care of her. Veronica says she will put her ass out. Melissa says she has nowhere to go, but Veronica says she’ll leave here. Melissa says, do it. She can’t put her out because she’s done. Benny tells them to stop it, and says he’s not in this. Melissa says, yes, he is, and Veronica says that’s one thing they agree on. He’s pissed her off, and don’t call her again. He says it works for him. She asks what they’re doing here, and pokes Benny, telling him to answer her. Benny says they need to stop. Veronica tells Benny he can leave now, and he does. Melissa dares Veronica to touch her and see what happens. Veronica goes after her, and Benny tries to separate them, but Veronica tosses her out the door. Benny asks what’s wrong with her, and Veronica tells him stay out. He just got on her bad side. Welcome to hell. She’s on the warpath, and he’s in her sight. She tells the both of them to get away. Melissa tells Benny that she has nowhere to go. Maybe she should have thought about that before. Benny says he’s sorry.

Derek takes Hanna to a jazz club. He introduces Hanna to Stephanie Mills. who apparently knows Derek. He leads her to the stage, and she sings. Hanna is impressed and thanks Derek. He tells her having fun is important. She says she lost her ability to have fun. He says that’s impossible; she just chose not to. She says her life has been a lot; she didn’t know how to smile. It’s way more than her grandson, but he was the worst. Derek says she’s in his prayers. She says it’s getting late and she has to stop by the church in the morning. He wants to go with her, but she says it’s choir rehearsal. Why doesn’t he just come to the service on Sunday? He asks if he should call her or wake her. She says if he thinks she’s sleeping with him, check himself. He tells her that he’s a man, and she says he’s supposed to be a saved man. He knows not until marriage. He asks if she’ going there, and says he likes her. He’s going to enjoy getting to know her. She says he seems like a nice guy.

At the jail, an inmate yells that they’re not animals. He asks why Jeffrey is there. Jeffrey asks him to stop talking to him. He understands, but can’t wait to get his lawyer. He tells Jeffrey there’s a cop who put him the back of his car, but he doesn’t finish. Jeffrey asks what he did, and the inmate says, he arrested you too, huh? He tells Jeffrey, let’s just say he was real friendly. He touched him sexually. Justin opens cell, and Jeffrey tells Justin that he has nothing to say. Justin isn’t here for him. He calls for Leslie Jackmore, saying it’s a fake name (ha-ha! it sounds like something a dude would make up), and the inmate talking to Jeffrey gets up. Justin says he’s coming with him. Leslie asks where they’re where going, and Justin repeats he’s coming with him. Leslie says he’s good there, but Justin tells him to get his ass up now. Justin looks at Jeffrey as he leads Leslie away.

Candace thanks unconscious Oscar. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Gia, and Candace says to give her the money. Gia thought she was giving it to Rocky, but Candace tells her to hand it over. She counts it, and says Gia’s not doing so good. Gia says it was slow, and Candace asks if she’s holding out. Gia keeps looking at Oscar, and Candace tells her to stop it. Gia asks if he’s asleep, and Candace says, no; it’s what they do. He’s out for rest of night. Gia wishes she could be ruthless like Candace. Candace says she can try, but she’ll never be as good. She tells Gia that it’s business, and don’t take it personally. Gia says Candace was right; Rico came after her. She told him that she was with Candace, and he backed off. Candace tells Gia that she needs her to call Jim and get him there. Talk dirty; whatever she needs to do.

At Kathryn’s house, Kathryn says Wyatt beat Jim’s ass. She wonders how long this is going to affect him, and Jim says they were sh*tty parents. Kathryn says he was a sh*tty father; she did what she could. Jim points out that she delegated everything she could, so she didn’t have to do anything herself. When was she there? She says more than he was. Jim says he was attentive the first year. Kathryn says the only thing he was attentive to was skirts, but he wasn’t the only horse in her stable. He still isn’t. He says admit it; they screwed up. She says he screwed up. He says, yes, and now they’re paying for it. She says for what he did, and he says, always blame Jim; he can handle it. She asks if he got the money, and he says he will tomorrow. Right now, he’s going to bed. She says he’s not staying there, but he goes upstairs anyway. She says it’s her house, and follows him.

Jim goes to the bedroom, and says, it’s too damn pink. He tells Kathryn that if she moves out the furniture while he’s sleeping, please be as quiet as last time. She asks if he can really sleep, and he says, yes. She calls him an SOB and leaves. Gia calls, and says she wanted to finish what they started. He tells her to call tomorrow, but she says to come to the Artisian right now. She’s sitting at the bar waiting. It will be amazing.

Hanna thanks Derek, and says it was a great night. He kisses her, but she doesn’t let it get too intense. He asks if she’s sure he can’t stay. Benny comes out, and says time for Derek to go. Derek says he’ll see Hanna tomorrow, and leaves. Benny says he’s coming too, and Hanna says it’s choir rehearsal, but he needs to go to church. Benny says she’s been drinking, and she tells him to hush. She asks who’s here, and Melissa comes out. She asks why Melissa is crying. Melissa says she was just put out and has nowhere to go. Hanna says they can talk, and takes her in the living room.

Hanna tells Melissa she’s sorry, and asks if Benny is helping her. Melissa says he told her she could come here, but didn’t know where she could stay. Hanna says if she’s a friend of his, and Benny says she’s not. Hanna asks where they met, and he says Veronica’s house. Melissa is supposed to be her daughter-in-law. Hanna asks if she’s marrying Jeffrey, and if she’s the one who’s supposed to be pregnant. Melissa asks how she knew, and Hanna says, Benny. Melissa apologizes, telling Hanna that she’s said too much. Hanna tells her she can stay there. Benny protests, but Hanna says he brought her there, and they’ve got the room. Benny tells her to pick one. Hanna says goodnight, and Benny follows her to the kitchen. He says Melissa can’t stay there; they don’t know her. Hanna says he’s sleeping with her. She might be his mama, but she’s a woman and knows what he’s doing. He says it just kind of happened, but she can’t stay here. Hanna says that’s his problem, not hers; deal with it. He says she can stay the night, but then he’ll take her to a hotel. He tells Melissa he’ll see her to her room.

In bed, David answers the phone. He thanks them for returning his call about his son. He says, tomorrow? and thanks them. They have no idea how much it means to him, and he’s sincerely in their debt. Erica asks if it’s good news, and he apologizes for waking her. It’s about his son. The judge is going to get him bail. She says his mother is something else, and David says everything is going to be all right. Erica says he’s saying that with worry, but he says, no, conviction. He takes her hand, and says he likes having her there. She loves being there. I’m not sure why, since he’s never there and there’s no TV, reading material, or even furniture. She says he’s something else. He’s nice, caring, and really great in bed. It makes her wonder what’s he doing with Veronica, and he says it wasn’t always like that. She says it doesn’t come out of nowhere. David supposes there were signs all along, but he explained them away. Erica asks if still loves Veronica, and he supposes in a way, but doesn’t want to be with her. No way will he ever be with her again; he’s positive. Erica says, good, because she wants to tell him something. It’s a a little soon, but she’s never met anyone like him or been treated like he treats her. He’s so attentive and makes her feel special. She’s falling for him. He says he’s falling for her too. She moves something inside of him; something good in his soul. They get busy.

Justin comes back to the cell, and calls Jeffrey. He tells Jeffrey that he’s free to go. He cuffs Jeffrey, saying he’s not free until he walks out. Jeffrey says that guy is going to press charges, and Justin says he’ll press something. The guy said he’s pretty good. He asks if he’s making Jeffrey jealous, and Jeffrey says Justin disgusts him. Justin says he’s detecting anger, and Jeffrey says he told him that he’s free; just get him out or take him back to his cell. Justin thinks Jeffrey is jealous, and Jeffrey tells him, go to hell. Justin says Jeffrey is allowed to have his friend, and Jeffrey says that’s all he is – a friend. Justin says he has one too. Jeffrey says that’s not a friend; it’s a crime he committed. Justin thinks it’s cute that Jeffrey is jealous, and Jeffrey says, pretty soon, they’ll be trading places. Justin doubts it, and tells him he’s not really free to go. Jeffrey asks why he’s doing this, and Justin says he has a big appetite. Jeffrey doesn’t want to hear it. Justin tells him not to lie to himself; he’s jealous. Jeffrey says Justin is the one lying to himself. If he’s not free, take him back to his cell, and get out of his face. Justin says the only place he’s taking Jeffrey is the interrogation room, but Jeffrey says he’s not going with him. Justin says it would take him a while to get it up again anyway; he’ll take him back.

Rocky tells his relief bartender that he’s late. He’s trying to show him the ropes. He knows the job pays sh*t, but it’s the hustle that pays. He has to be on time. He tells the dude to get to work.

At the Iron Bone bar, the drug dealer notes Wyatt is back again, and asks if he did it all. Wyatt says no, and the dealer says he was wondering how Wyatt was standing. Wyatt asks if has any more, and the dealer asks if Wyatt is setting him up. Wyatt says, no, and he asks why Wyatt is back so soon then. Bartender Jerry brings out a baseball bat. The dealer asks what’s going on, and what Wyatt isn’t telling him. Wyatt admits his dad poured it down the sink. We all laugh. He says is dad doesn’t want him using. The dealer asks if he’s got money, and Wyatt says he’s a little behind. The dealer says, get out, but Wyatt says they’ve got an ATM, and he can give him the money after midnight. The dealer tells him to come back when he has it, but Wyatt says he’ll just drink until midnight. He asks for a whiskey. Jerry says he’s in bad shape and tells the dealer to give it to him. He can tell Wyatt has money by his car keys. The dealer says Wyatt is in luck, but if he doesn’t get his money, he’ll kill him. Wyatt says he’ll get it, and the dealer says, yes, he will.

Candace tries to wake Oscar up. Nothing happens, except foam trickles from his mouth.

Next time, Veronica tells Benny she’s going to get back at him, Wyatt can’t get the money, and Candace has a situation.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion Part Three

Jumping right in, Andy asks LVP when the decision to not use Dorit’s photos was made. She’d said it was the day before the magazine went to press, but from the photo shoot clip, it looks like it was the month before. Why wasn’t she up front? LVP says they shot the new photos the month before, but didn’t know if they’d like them. Dorit asks if LVP was looking to punish her, but LVP says Dorit didn’t like them. Erika says she thinks LVP felt like Dorit was an a-hole, so she’ll be another a-hole and cut off her head. Kyle says, off with her head. Andy says it wasn’t a mistake, and LVP says she didn’t personally edit the photos. Dorit feels like LVP could have told her about it sooner. She doesn’t believe it was a few days before, because of them having another photo shoot. Andy says it looked like LVP was making the decision right then. LVP says the fashion director makes those decisions. Dorit says she could override it, but LVP says she didn’t care. LisaR asks why she didn’t use the photos anyway. LVP says Mark (the photographer) was adamant about not wanting the negativity. Erika says they’re still the same images, just without Dorit’s head. I’m totally bored with this topic, and LisaR asks why not use the other model? LVP says, damned if you do, and damned if you don’t; you can’t win with this group. Erika says they all feel the same way. Andy asks if the issue is out, and LVP asks if he wants a copy

Andy brings up LisaR saying that Teddi was a newer, younger version of Dorit for LVP. Lisa says Teddi better mind her Ps and Qs. This started me thinking, what does that mean anyway, so definition below. LVP says Teddi is a few years older than her daughter, and jokes about the rest of these old bags. Andy asks if LVP likes it that Dorit is jealous of Teddi. LVP says they had a temporary demise of their friendship. LisaR thinks it’s not that big of a deal, but LVP says, at the time, her feelings were hurt. Kyle says they’re newer friends, and she told Dorit to say something after she’d talked behind LVP’s back. LVP says Dorit talks so much, she forgets the accuracy of her recollection. LisaR says Kyle got on her case when she wasn’t accurate, and we flash back to that. LVP says they all have different standards.

Next is Berlin or bust, and we revisit the trip. Pandas! Andy says their visit to the Holocaust museum was quite touching. He asks Dorit if both of her parents are Jewish. She says they are, and Andy says going there must have been meaningful. Dorit says it’s difficult; she did lose a lot of family. Kyle converted to Judaism for Mauricio, and Andy asks how the war affected his family. Kyle doesn’t know much, and says his family moved to Mexico (which I find really interesting), and that everyone lost family.

We see LisaR’s scary moment on the horse. She says when you can’t stop something moving, it’s scary, and thank God for Teddi. Andy asks Kyle why go riding when she’s allergic, and she says she never had an anaphylactic reaction before. Some German guy she didn’t know was giving her she didn’t know what, and she started to panic. Andy talks about Erika almost getting creamed by a cyclist when she was late for the boat, and we see a clip of that. I love how Erika doesn’t even bat an eye. She’d make a good New Yorker. Erika says she started the day late, and it kept snowballing. Andy asks why it was upsetting to LVP that Kyle forgot who Nanny Kay was. LVP says Nanny Kay lived with her off and on for twenty-five years, and was like her mother. Erika remembers. Kyle says it’s no indication of her love for LVP. LVP says to be frank, most of their conversations are about Kyle – because she has anxiety, hypochondria, and family dynamics going on – even though Kyle had said it was all about LVP when they were at the dinner with Dorit. LVP says she feels like an older sister, whose job is to counsel her and calm her down. Kyle says she’s more open in sharing, and LVP says she has her knickers in a permanent twist. Andy asks why LisaR is getting a kick out of this, and she says it’s because she’s not involved. Andy asks LisaR if LVP likes it when Kyle is vulnerable. LisaR thinks the dynamic is that LVP takes care of Kyle, but it’s more complicated and deeper than it seems. Andy asks if LVP really feels that it’s all about Kyle, and Kyle says this is new. LVP says a lot of the time, she’s like the matriarch, talking her down off the ledge. Kyle says if she really thought the friendship only revolved around LVP, she wouldn’t be happy with it. She apologizes for what she said at the dinner.

Andy tells us to be careful what we wish for. Success is not always award winning. Kyle’s American Woman show is discussed. Kyle doesn’t think her sisters understood the project, and that it’s inspired by, but not their life. We see a clip of her telling Dorit that she’s not always invited to Christmas. Wow. I missed that the first time around. That’s terrible. She says for years, Mauricio worked for her brother-in-law, and then went on his own. It didn’t go well with the family dynamic, and complicated things. She loves her sisters, but it’s complicated (the word of the night). She tells Andy the show will be premiering this summer. He asks if her sisters have seen it, but she says, not yet. She’s looking forward to them seeing it. Andy asks if the issue is that they think it’s their story to tell, and Kyle says it’s not exactly like their life. There’s creative license, and it’s inspired by, not based on. They think it’s more literal, but she would never take the liberty of telling someone else’s story. Andy asks if she’s speaking with (her sister) Kathy, and she says they haven’t spoken in six months. She thinks when Kathy sees it, she’ll realize she’s been reading the situation wrong. She’s told her that a single mom in the 70s was only the jumping off point. Kyle thinks started with Mauricio leaving and starting his own company. LVP thinks if her mom was alive, the cohesion would pull them together. She met with Kathy the night before, and she said the same thing. Kyle doesn’t like talking about her sisters, since they’re not part of the show, and thinks it’s unfair. She starts to cry, and says she feels like she couldn’t share everything with them. Her husband is supportive, but it’s not the same. Andy asks about another new show she has going on, called Glass Houses, about a woman who challenges the dominance of another woman in real estate. He asks if it’s similar to Mauricio’s situation, and Kyle says it has nothing to do with real life. He asks if she thought she might be tempting fate and pissing off Kathy. Kyle says Kathy didn’t like this show either, but she’d never throw anyone in her family under the bus. Dorit says family means everything to Kyle. Kyle says she adores Dorit.

Andy moves on to cool girls and crybabies, a tumultuous summer with Teddi. We flash back to the friction between Erika and Teddi. A viewer asks if Teddi was calling Erika a liar or just used the wrong words. Teddi say it was a flippant comment, and she really didn’t think about it. Erika asks why challenge her integrity? Teddi says she was frustrated, and reacted strongly to her. Erika points out that Dorit hammered Teddi for weeks, and they had it out, but if she shows strength, it’s different. Teddi says Erika talks down to her, and she’s never been spoken to like that. Erika says it has to do with her then. Teddi says maybe in her world people talk that way. Erika says Teddi is sophisticated and well-traveled, and Teddi asks if she thinks sophisticated people scream at each other. Erika says she wasn’t screaming, and why call her a liar? Teddi says Erika didn’t have to get involved in the conversation. Erika thinks Teddi is stronger and more calculating than she lets on. Teddi says she never called herself innocent, but Erika says she thinks of herself like a fawn among sharks. She needs to grow up or GTFO.

Teddi says that talking down to someone isn’t empowering, and she doesn’t need to rise up to say something she’ll regret. LVP says if Erika spoke to her that way, she’d be upset. Erika insists she’s not aggressive. LisaR brings up Kyle ambushing her in front of a group when she didn’t remember saying something. We flash back to LisaR saying Kim is at death’s door, and Kyle confronting her later. LisaR says Kyle could have talked to her alone; it was traumatic. Kyle asks if she didn’t say it, and LisaR says, yes, but she didn’t remember saying it. Andy asks if Erika is too harsh or Teddi too sensitive. Kyle says she thinks Teddi felt that she wasn’t being treated as an equal. A viewer asks if Erika’s glam squad was waiting at the hotel when she left the beach house, and Erika says she took a shower and went to bed. LisaR doesn’t understand why anyone gives a sh*t. Erika says it wasn’t personal. Andy says a lot of viewers pinged on her for pushing Teddi away when Teddi tried to hug her. Erika says it’s embarrassing to have to explain herself to other women. LVP thinks when Erika is vulnerable, she doesn’t want to draw attention to it, which isn’t necessarily a negative. A viewer thinks Erika is suffering from PTSD, and Erika wonders where it would have come from. LisaR says at least she’s not a schizophrenic. Teddi thinks it’s intentional, and Erika knows what she’s doing.

Andy brings up Teddi’s blog, and how some of her tweets about Erika were retweeted. Erika says she didn’t appreciated being called Regina from Mean Girls, and it went on week after week. Teddi says, cathartically, she needed to, and says Erika liked some things that suggested Teddi be fired. Erika says she did it because Teddi’s blog was so scathing, saying she had no character and no real friendships, when she doesn’t know anything about her. LisaR says they’re both hurt, and that’s where it stems from. Teddi says the other women have been doing this for a long time and didn’t treat her that way, but she’s not pretending to be fault free. Erika says rude to everyone. There you go; join the club. Andy asks if Erika really scares the sh*t out of Teddi, and Teddi says she doesn’t like the uncertainty. She doesn’t know what she’s going to get; a lashing or an empowerment speech. Kyle says it’s hard coming into group like this. I’ll bet.

Andy says Erika describes herself as a-hole, which is a big admission. He asks if it’s something she wants to work on or change. Erika says with certain audiences, her responses have to be tailored, and in some places, she’s not an a-hole. Andy can’t tell if she’s taking ownership over her behavior in saying it’s Teddi’s problem. She does feel like throughout the season, it was more Teddi. Teddi say as long as they can have mutual respect, she’ll go with whatever she’s given.

Andy asks if it’s what Teddi expected, and she says she had no expectations. There were hard and good times, and she’s leaving more educated. He asks if LisaR thinks the old Rinna will rise from the ashes or will she continue being Yoda Rinna. Erika says she might come out if properly motivated, and LVP says she can’t keep it up forever. He says Dorit had a hard season, and asks if she has any regrets. Dorit says when she watches it back, she wishes she’d handled some things differently. There were apologies she didn’t make, and should have accepted others sooner. She learned about herself. Andy asks where she and Teddi go from here, and they agree there’s more work to do. He asks Erika what’s next, and she says the future looks good. He asks about her and Teddi, and Erika thinks they’ve put this season to bed. She knows Teddi communicates differently. Erika hears her, but they needed to have it out. Teddi says it felt like the right way. Kyle says she expects a lot from her friends, but she thinks she and Dorit will be fine. LVP says it was an extraordinary experience, and they were challenged in the public arena. She’s learned from Kyle to be more open, and not so guarded and British. She looks at Kyle like the sister she didn’t have. She feels Dorit was largely misunderstood, but the audience should give her another chance. She has a good heart, and is kind and supportive.

Andy calls for champagne in steins, but has a champagne glass for Dorit. Why not throw a pair of panties at Erika while he’s at it? Kyle toasts to supporting one another, working through their issues, and knowing each other better.

And we’re out.

⚓ Next time – the Below Deck Mediterranean season premiere.

🚸 Since I Promised…

Minding your Ps and Qs. It’s  likely that p and q stands for “pints and quarts,” in which case the phrase might originally have referred to a landlord totting up a customer’s tab, or to a drinker being told to mind how much they’re putting away.

For a more lengthy explanation:

http://mentalfloss.com/article/72122/what-exactly-are-your-ps-and-qs-and-why-do-you-have-mind-them

☝ Yet One More…

P&amp;Q

May 7, 2018 – Franco Meets with Steve, VanderReunion, a Small Ramble & a Bad Seed

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

At the door of the Quartermaine mansion, Carly says she can do this. Monica answers, saying it’s an unexpected pleasure. It’s an unexpected Monica too, since she’s temporarily being played by Patty McCormack of Bad Seed fame. Monica asks if she and Carly had a breakfast appointment, but Carly say she’s accepting Monica’s information to co-host the baby shower. Nelle joins them, and Carly says she feels strongly about giving her a fitting tribute.

Ava tells Griff how Avery didn’t shed a tear when she dropped her off at school. He says Avery sounds like an independent lady already. Ava can’t believe Avery is with her, and tomorrow she’ll get to do it again. She assumes he’s still thinking she went too far to make this miracle happen. Griff says he’s happy Avery is with her, no matter how she accomplished it. The timing works out too. Ava asks for what, and he says, for him to move out.

Franco is procrastinating before he goes to meet Steve. He tells Elizabeth that he’s decades late, so avoiding him for another fifteen minutes won’t matter. He says it’s also Jake’s birthday, but Elizabeth tells him that the best present he can give Jake is himself, cleared of his demons. The sooner he leaves, the sooner he’s home. They have lots to celebrate.

Kim goes to Charlie’s. She wants to talk about Kelly’s with Julian. He asks if she means when she blew him off to have lunch with Drew. She says he deliberately brought up Sam with Drew. Julian apologizes, saying he was in a mood. Seeing her with Drew brought out worst in him. She says she didn’t love it, and hopes it won’t happen again. Alexis walks in, and asks, why was she summoned before her second cup of coffee?

Jason brings a birthday gift to Elizabeth’s house. She calls Jake downstairs, telling Jason that he’s home with a stomach ache. Jake says, hi, and Jason says, hey. I see the apple didn’t fall far from the tree when it comes to conversation.

Franco meets Steve at Kelly’s. Steve says he almost didn’t show, and Franco says it’s something else they have in common. They introduce themselves, and shake hands.

Curtis asks if Alexis is on board, and Jordan says they’re walking a fine line. Alexis is clueless, and Molly tells her the reconstruction of Charles Street is taking forever. Kim says the people can’t begin to cover their medical expenses either. Curtis says they have to put the pressure on. Alexis asks why she’s there. Stella says she’s a lawyer, and they’re going to sue their britches off.

Ned tells Olivia-Q that he promised a new day for Port Charles, but instead, got a nightmare. The repairs have barely started, and as mayor, he should do more. Olivia says he can’t coerce the insurance companies to pay up or rebuild it himself. He says the devastation Jim created remains, funds are barely trickling in, and people are hurting. She has something that might boost his outlook.

Ava says Griff doesn’t have to leave because of Avery, and his apartment isn’t ready yet. He tells her that he can get a room. It seems like a logical solution. It was supposed to be a temporary situation, and she needs to get Avery settled. Ava says he’s such a big advocate for honesty; why not be honest? It’s not about Avery or a temporary arrangement. He can’t forgive her for using Mike as leverage. He tells her there’s no sense in rehashing it. She says she apologized for being less than forthcoming, but she’s not sorry. She’s a mother, and did what she had to. Griff say she did what she had to in order to expedite the change in custody. He can’t change it, but doesn’t have to like it. She says he’d told her he accepted her for who she is, and wouldn’t presume to judge her. When did that change?

Monica says she has everything sewn up, but Carly insists on helping. She asks what about desserts? They have a new pastry chef that makes incredible macaroons. Monica says it’s not necessary, but Nelle thinks it would be wonderful. Monica agrees Carly can provide macaroons and will inform Cook 2 to add them to the menu. Nelle says it’s a lovely gesture, and appreciates it, since Carly has every right to hate her. Not just for the past, but for what she did recently as well. She can’t go on treating Carly this way, and has a confession to make.

Elizabeth tells Jake that Jason stopped by to wish him a happy birthday. Jason asks how he’s feeling, and Jake wonders why. Elizabeth says he’s referring to Jake’s reason for being home, and Jake says he’s starting to feel better. Jason asks if there’s a party planned, and Jake says, just family – his mom, brother, Drew, and Franco. Jason gives him a card. Jake says thanks, but doesn’t open it, saying he’ll open it when Drew comes, so he can open everything at the same time. Jason hopes he gets everything he wants and more. Elizabeth asks Jason to stay for a bit, but Jake doesn’t look too sure.

Steve says he knew Jim after Franco did; he was probably his last victim. He doesn’t like using that word, but it’s what they are. Franco says they’re members of a club no one wants to be in. He tells Steve that nobody shed a tear to find out Jim was dead, and Steve says everyone at the office was stunned. He says he was relieved, and explains he works at Niagara Equities; he’s the VP of finance. Franco can’t believe Steve worked for Jim after what he did. He’s not judging, but doesn’t get it. Steve says that’s fair. He’s asked himself the same thing. When he met Jim, he was a kid on the street; no family, no nothing. Jim was good to him – until he wasn’t. He stayed because he didn’t have anything else. It was next to impossible to cut the cord. He couldn’t let go. Franco says he understands what it means more than Steve knows.

Alexis asks who they’re suing, and Stella says Niagara Equities, and the fat cats taking their sweet time repairing the area. Molly suggests staging a protest if they have to. Lucy asks if she can intercept the conversation for a moment. She discourages them from a massive protest, as it will make the property values go down more than they are already. Julian tells her to hold on, and she says it’s funny coming from the one person who had no damage. Kim says Charlie has been generous, confusing Lucy. Alexis explains it’s a nickname, and tells them that they can’t squeeze blood from a turnip.

Ava tells Griff that they both have flaws and weaknesses, but they have strengths too, and should use them to get through the rough patches. They can’t turn tail and run whenever one of them disappoints the other. He says he’s not running. He was disappointed in how she used Mike. He hates seeing her revert – he stops. She finishes, to how she used to be before he saved her. That’s really why he’s leaving. He’s all out of miracles.

Nelle tells Carly that she thought asking her and Sonny to be guardians was a gesture of good will, but as usual, she just managed to upset Carly. Carly says her showing up is a gesture too. Nelle says, like yesterday, how she took Josslyn shopping for the shower gift. Her best intentions only cause more pain. She’d thought naming the baby Morgan would be a good thing; someone Carly loved and could remember. Carly thinks it’s nice that Nelle helped Josslyn to buy her a present. Monica says the present is for the baby, but Carly says it’s for the mama too. Of course she appreciates Nelle making them guardians, but it caused a huge debate, and Michael ripped up the papers. If she chooses to have them redrawn, they’ll step up if something happens to her – God forbid.

Jason asks if Jake is excited about school being almost over. Jake says he is, but he likes school. Jason asks what he’s studying, and Jake says the usual stuff. Elizabeth interjects that his favorite subjects are art and math. Jake says Drew helps him with math, and Franco helps with his art. Elizabeth says he’s a good student. The phone rings, and Elizabeth tells Jake it’s an international call. It’s Spencer, and Jake goes upstairs to talk. Elizabeth asks if Jason is okay. He says, it will take time for them to know each other, and Elizabeth says they will.

Alexis says the rule of thumb in civil court is that if you can’t collect, don’t sue. They’ll have their day in court, and might beat Niagara, but it’s not a slam dunk. Niagara is bankrupt. Curtis says they still have capital, but Alexis says it will take years and cost a fortune. (Or as I would say, get in line behind the rest of the creditors.) Stella asks where people are supposed to live in the meantime – their cars? Molly still likes the idea of a protest. Lucy tells them to keep their options open, and leaves. Julian asks if there’s really nothing they can do, and Alexis says there might be one thing.

Olivia gives Ned her tablet, and says it’s a teaser trailer. If there’s any interest, they can do more. It’s a taste of what the city has to offer. Olivia stands in front of the hospital, and says, welcome to Port Charles, New York, and the many people and places that make it a unique and vibrant community. Inside the hospital she asks Griff about the hospital. Griff looks a little petrified to be on camera, and says the hospital is state of the art, and has an award-winning staff who cares about the people of the city. Olivia goes to Kelly’s, and says sooner or later everyone ends up there. She asks Jordan what she would like the people to know about the city. Jordan says, it’s a place for everyone, culturally and economically diverse, which makes the city richer. Olivia shows off the MetroCourt next, and says Port Charles is a great place to visit, and an even better place to live. She asks Ned what he thinks. He grabs her and says he thinks she’s amazing.

Nelle tells Carly that her help with the shower means so much. They might never be friends, but she hopes for the baby’s sake, they’ll never be enemies. Carly says she wants to make it a memorable occasion. Nelle has to check in with work. She says Ava is working from home, since she’s getting Avery settled. She apologizes, saying she did it again. Carly says she works for Ava, so her name is going to come up. She tells Nelle to give Avery a hug for her and her daddy. Nelle leaves, and Monica asks, what’s the catch? Carly has no idea what she means, and Monica says she shows up brimming with ideas, like she’s Nelle’s BFF. What is she up to?

Griff tells Ava to stop accusing him of saving her soul, and cut the priest references. She says he caught her off guard; what is she supposed to think? They barely said good morning, when he springs this on her. He doesn’t want to leave like this, and she tells him to stay and work it out. Lucy knocks at the door, and Ava tells her to go away. Lucy says it’s in her best interest to open the door, and starts banging on it. Ava says it better be good, and Lucy says it’s about the Nurses’ Ball, and there’s nothing more important. Ava says she gave her contribution already. Lucy remembers, and says she was disappointed. She shows Ava a check with nothing filled in.

Jason complements a picture Jake did, and Elizabeth says Franco helped him. He recognized Jake’s talent early on. She feels that if Jason knew Franco’s whole story… but it’s not her place to give the details. She had faith in him, even when he had none in himself.

Franco tells Steve that he was afraid, and his fear bought his silence. Jim wanted him to keep his mouth shut. He blocked it to the point where he forgot altogether. If he hadn’t done that or stopped Jim, he could have spared Steve and the others. Steve tells Franco that he’s full of crap.

Ava says she wrote it out. The lightbulb comes on over my head when I remember her using Nelle’s pen. Griff leaves, and Lucy hopes she wasn’t interrupting anything. Ava asks if it would make a difference, and she says, heck no. Lucy asks how long they’ve been living together; what’s the deal? Ava says she has a long day, and she’s sure Lucy does too, so Ava doesn’t want to keep her. She gives Lucy another check, and Lucy says she’s going right to the bank. She obviously needs to deposit it right away. She leaves, and Ava looks at the check copies in her checkbook. She says, something’s not right. She takes out the pen. I wonder if she swiped Nelle’s pen, and then wonder if there is such a thing as disappearing ink.

Carly drops her pill bottle, and Monica asks if she’s anxious. Carly asks if Monica is shaming her, and says it’s unbecoming for a doctor. Monica says now the real Carly shows up. Carly says the real Monica too. She knows Monica won’t forgive her about AJ, but he was self-destructive. Monica remembers Carly taking advantage of that, and Carly asks why she’s turning a blind to Nelle. Is she punishing Carly for making her grandchild a Corinthos, by making Carly’s a Quartermaine, even if it means sucking up to a scheming snake? Well, wouldn’t the child be a Quartermaine regardless? It’s not like Monica got Nelle pregnant. Monica says she’s having a shower to celebrate Nelle and the baby. If Carly can’t manage to be civil, she can keep her flowers and macaroons, and stay home. Carly says, wild horses couldn’t keep her away.

Elizabeth asks Jake how Spencer is, and Jake says, great. He told him that Jason was there, and then felt badly because Spencer has no dad, and he has three. Jason tells him to enjoy his birthday, and starts to leave. Jake says he changed his mind. He wants to open Jason’s gift now; he doesn’t want to wait.

Steve thinks Franco wants him to be mad at him. He says he just started therapy, and either he’s a fast learner or Franco is behind. He’s still covering up for Jim, and buying into his lies by making it his fault. He bets that’s what Jim said; Franco is bad and it’s his fault. It was his go-to move, and he probably said it to all of them until Franco and his friend stopped him. Steve did what he needed to survive, and Franco did too. None of it is his fault. Jim is dead. Let what he did die with him. Franco wishes he could, but doesn’t think it’s possible.

Molly says she’ll fill TJ in, and tells Jordan congratulations. Curtis stands behind Jordan, shaking his head. Jordan asks what she’s being congratulated for, and Molly says if her mom’s plan works, they won’t be bothering Jordan. Jordan’s phone rings, and she steps away. Molly tells Curtis that she’s sorry. He tells her no deal has been done yet.

Alexis finds Ned, and he says her timing is perfect. Olivia came up with a plan to revitalize the city. For once they’re on the same page. Alexis doubts it.

Carly asks Griff if he’s alone for breakfast. He says he’s planning on an extended stay. She asks if he finally came to his senses and left Ava.

At Ava’s, Nelle says she’s working on a blanket; something for the shower. Ava says people are supposed to bring gifts to her. Nelle says it’s special. Ava says she has something else that’s special; Nelle’s pen. She shouldn’t leave it around. She asks if it’s part of the plan to bring Carly down, and tells Nelle she used it to write a check, and can’t have it around. Whatever Nelle is up to, Ava is out entirely. Nelle says things have escalated, and she thinks Ava should take a more active role.

Jason has given Jake tickets to a minor league game on Memorial Day. He tells Jake that he can take anyone he wants. Jake thanks him, and asks if he can come. Jason says he wouldn’t miss it.

Franco colors the placemat. He tells Steve that Jim has other victims. Steve says the company lost everything because of the illegal drilling. He tells Franco not to give up. He might be able to help.

Alexis tells Ned and Olivia the video sounds wonderful. She hopes it boosts the city’s economy. Ned will need it to defray legal costs. She assumes he’ll want a jury trial. Ned is perplexed, and she says the people hit the hardest, the residents of Charles Street, are suing the city of Port Charles.

Griff tells Carly that he and Ava are still together, but Avery is living there. Carly says, part time. She says he’s Mike’s doctor. He knew Mike was innocent, and did nothing while Ava charged him with kidnapping. Um… Griff provided the medical records and tried to talk her out of it. That’s not something? Carly says now Sonny has to share Avery to keep Mike out of prison. Avery is spending half her time with the woman who destroyed her brother. Morgan would still be alive if Ava hadn’t tampered with his lithium. The only reason she’s not throwing him out, is that he’d go back to Ava. It makes her smile to know Ava is alone, without the boy toy she got to replace Carly’s son.

Ava tells Nelle she can’t do anything to risk losing Avery. Whatever she’s planned, she’s on her own. Nelle says she might want to rethink that. How would Griff feel to know she took a photo of privileged information. She shows Ava the picture of the DNA test on her phone. Ava calls her an ingrate, reminding Nelle of how she gave her a job when no one else would. She asks how much, and Nelle says she doesn’t want money. She just needs Ava to come to the shower, and bring a present.

Tomorrow, Ned accuses Alexis of wanting to keep herself in the public eye, Lulu talks to Anna about Henrik, and Jason doesn’t want to share his memory or anything else with Drew. Now who’s the baby?

🏆 Congrats to Daytime Emmy winners Chloe Lanier (Nelle) and Vernee Watson (Stella), who received the award for Outstanding Younger Actress and Outstanding Guest Performer, respectively. Once again Todd Roger Howarth was robbed. Not even a nomination. Pfft! Michael Easton (Finn) was nominated, but didn’t win. So double Pfft!

Vanderpump Rules – The Reunion Part One

Giggy! Lisa says she can’t do it without him. Jax hopes there are no casualties. He’s expecting the worst and hoping for the best. I hope Jax is the only casualty, and he already is the worst. Scheana doesn’t know what anyone could possibly come at her for. Tom lets Kristen know her boob is hanging out. At least they’ve graduated from the cheap reunion and aren’t in the Clubhouse anymore.

Andy jumps right to the elephant in the room – Jax and Brittany are together again. Now my stomach is a casualty, since I want to throw up. Scheana is no longer with Rob, and Stassi has a new boyfriend. Lala is still with her man, and Kristen with Carter. Andy asks if James is still with Logan, and he says he’s still with Raquel. Lala is wearing the biggest hoops ever, and Andy says, the bigger the hoop, the better the relationship. I want them. They’re bigger than the ones I was wearing when my boss suggested shooting a basketball through them.

The season began with the revelation that Jax cheated on Brittany with Faith. Jax tells Brittany he loves her before things get nasty. Brittany says they were just talking about having kids, and she’d thought things were going well; everyone had said how much she had helped him to change. He says he put her through the ringer, but didn’t see it. Tom says he was a straight up d*ck, and affected everyone. He and Ariana had their worst argument ever. Andy asks about them having sex while a 95-year-old woman was in the room. (In case you’re out of the loop, Faith was supposed to be looking after an old lady when she was having sex with Jax.) Jax says it looked like an old woman’s house, but he didn’t know an old woman was in it. Andy asks why he did it. Because he’s Jax, you twit, and the most awful person in the universe. Jax says they’d been arguing a lot, and his way of getting out of a relationship is cheating. Instead of being an adult and getting help, he takes the cowardly way out. He says it could have been anyone; whoever was paying attention to him. Brittany says that’s effed up, since she was paying attention to him. Andy asks Schwartz why he has such blind loyalty to Jax. He says Jax was instrumental in his transition to LA. Jax says he never felt bad and had no conscience. Andy asks about Brittany’s trip to Vegas, and why she came back to Jax. Brittany says it was an emotional thing.

We move on to Lala. Andy asks why she wanted to come back. Lala says she felt thrown into a group who’d been together for a long time. Scheana reached out, and she felt it was a safe place for the first time. Ariana says people can see who she is now. Scheana says she keeps getting sh*t by Lala, and the tone-deaf thing was rude. Maybe, but true. Lala says she didn’t make her sing. Tom says she made fun of his trumpet playing too. We see a clip of her saying it’s like baby dolphins trying to communicate for the first time. Then we see a clip of Tom playing the trumpet, and she’s right. Scheana says Lala has a different tone in interviews. Lala tells Scheana that she only knows how to talk about herself.

Andy says Logan is the third person to say he’s been with James, that James denies. He asks if James has ever hooked up with Logan, but James says he’s never dipped in the man pool. If people want to think that, fine. Kristen thinks where there’s smoke, there’s fire. James mentions having sex with Kristen on the hood of his Beamer and how she denied it, and gets accused of deflection. James says he knows where he’s dipped his willy.

Stassi says it was horrifying to watch her and Patrick. Ariana tells her that she looked amazing, and he looked disgusting. Tom thought it was crazy that Patrick had a no contact rule when he went to Amsterdam with no contact, and how he got pissed when she didn’t text him in Mexico. Schwartz says it was toxic, and it broke his heart to see her neutralized. Lisa says Stassi has been unhappy the entire time, and she didn’t think it was the right relationship. When watching the show, Stassi saw Patrick saying he’d be okay if she banged other guys; she just couldn’t date them. She says she wished she’d known; she would have had some fun. They talk about Patrick’s use of big words. Andy asks if Jax ever had the curiosity to look up anything, but he’s good. Andy lists names viewers have called Patrick, and Jax knows those words. Stassi says she didn’t recognize herself; she was submissive. Ariana says her ex went for the jugular more, but Stassi lived with the manipulation. She’s glad they’re both out of that. Stassi is sorry she wasted time, but Ariana says it was a learning experience. Stassi says she’s learned she wants to live her life honestly and be with someone who accepts her.

Andy asks Ariana what caused the dry spell. She says she was uncomfortable with herself, and they weren’t building intimacy. Then we get totally TMI about their sex life, and I go ♫ La-la-la! ♫ Andy asks Lisa what it’s like seeing someone as beautiful as Ariana be so self-conscious. Ariana gets all weird about being called beautiful. She says things are better now, and they’re working toward getting to the best in an honest way. I have no clue what that means. Andy asks if she regrets talking about it. She says sometimes, but not when people contact her who’ve been in the same boat.

Jax’s dad passed away from cancer last December. Jax says they spoke every day. He’d just talked to him, and got the call from is mom after Christmas. They were on their way to dinner, and he was in the car when he got the call. He pulled over, and Brittany took over. Ever since then, he can’t imagine himself without her. I have marginal feels for Jax with this, since I was close to my father, who passed away suddenly just before I got married. He says the guys came to Florida. Stassi, Kristen, and Rachel also went. Stassi says she couldn’t not go. Scheana say she would have. Andy says the girls have two things in common; they hate him, but they showed up anyway. He asks what’s biggest thing Jax learned about Brittany. He says she literally took charge, after everything he’d put her through. Brittany says she loves him and his family. He says it’s the worst thing that’s happened to him, but their relationship is the best it’s been. It’s his first funeral. He never knew someone who died. I’m glad their moving on, since I don’t want to feel badly for Jax, and this is sad.

Andy says TomTom is the fourth restaurant/bar in the Vanderpump empire, and asks Lisa why the Toms? She says she adores them, and they add great energy to the equation. Andy asks if Tom is at the grown-up table yet, and he says he’s getting there. Schwartz says they’re not having idea sex yet, but there’s been foreplay. Tom tells Lisa that sometimes décor should be second to functionality. Ken is talking about buying a wine fridge, and Tom doesn’t believe it will bring in revenue. Schwartz says they’re investors, ambassadors, and promoters. Lisa supports that, but needs them to do what they’re good at. At five percent, they’re very junior partners. Tom says the restaurant didn’t need to cost so much, and Lisa says it was her choice. She thinks she knows what she’s doing. She says she hasn’t cashed the checks yet, and Andy asks if it’s fair to hold it over them. Lisa says she isn’t. She wants their involvement, but not if they’re unhappy. She says a partnership is like a marriage. Andy asks if there’s a formal contract, and Lisa says just a handshake. She never had one with Guillermo either. Tom says they’ll figure everything out in the next few weeks. Jax asks if this shouldn’t have bene talked about before the handshake. Lisa says she’s giving them the opportunity to invest. Tom says their names do have value, or she wouldn’t have named the restaurant after them. Lisa says, of course. Andy asks if they’re worried they won’t like her choices. Lisa says she has the reputation for creating beautiful restaurants, and if they don’t like it, they can suck it. That she says this with a British accent, actually makes it pleasant sounding. And of course, Lisa can do no wrong, being the patron saint of dogs. Andy asks Jax if he was jealous about the venture, and he says not after hearing all this. Andy asks Tom if Lisa should take him seriously after he drank fireball before a meeting. Tom says he can handle himself in those situations, but probably not.

Andy says the Vegas trip was interesting. He commends Brittany on her pregnancy scare prank. He asks if they use contraception, because why not? Jax looks at Brittany like he doesn’t know the answer. Katie says she’ll explain how babies are made. What they’re doing makes babies. Jax says after his father’s death, he’s ready to have kids. Andy asks Stassi if she thinks he’d be a good dad. Stassi says she’s noticed he’s changed; not a 180, but different. She thinks he’d step up. Jax says if could take something good out of it, it’s to be the dad his father was, and the person he was. Dammit! There are tears in my eyes, and I hate Jax even more for doing this to me.

Scheana is doing her Sex Tips… play in Vegas, and Andy asks how it is to be single there.. Scheana says it’s a good place to be single, but doesn’t elaborate.  Andy asks Lala why she and Scheana aren’t tight anymore, and Lala feels the support wasn’t reciprocal. Scheana goes on a  tear about how many burdens she’s been carrying, and that Lala didn’t invite her on the private jet because she’s too much drama. There’s some back and forth with them that’s totally unimportant.

They joke about Scheana not saying much about Rob this season, and show five thousand clips of her talking about him. She says they dated before she met Shay, and she’d had a what if? question in her head over the years. She says she met him after she graduated college, and I’m stunned to find out she graduated college. It must be easier these days. Scheana goes down Rob Memory Lane until everyone is like, wrap it up. Andy asks why she wouldn’t entertain the notion of Rob kissing someone else. Was she in denial? Scheana says that’s the moment he pulled away. She says Shay always had her back, even when she treated him poorly. Rob shut off two weeks after they wrapped. She wondered if it was a calculated move, so she wouldn’t have the storyline of another breakup. Kristen says it’s manipulation at its finest. Scheana is surprised to find out Rob has been texting Jax.

Scheana gets all emotional, saying that she was head over heels for Rob, and loved him for twelve years. She could justify her divorce, but this left her brokenhearted. Lisa says he came into her life and on her show, knowing when it aired and that she’d be humiliated. It’s not fair. Kristen says he claimed to not want to do the show, but managed to be at every red-carpet event. Lala says she knows they have issues, but Scheana put her heart, soul, and effort into everything she did. Lala says the only time Rob was around was when Scheana wasn’t. It wasn’t just the behavior of someone who treats her wrong, but someone who doesn’t want to be with someone else. Andy says Rob saying he didn’t throw around I love you lightly, made it seem like he hadn’t said it. Scheana insists he had. I don’t believe it. I can just see her trying to be the cool girl, all the while lying to herself. Jax says he just repeated what Rob had said. Scheana says Jax told every Rob had said he didn’t think he was in love with her. This degenerates into Jax getting pissed all over again about Scheana trying to set Brittany up. Jax says that the guy Scheana supposed loved, wasn’t saying it back. Scheana swears he did. Andy tells Jax that Scheana claims he was threatened by Rob being taller, more successful, and better looking. Jax asks how that’s working for her, and she says eff you. He says she didn’t even call him when his father died. She says she texted him. He says she invited him to her Vegas show though.

Scheana says she’s never done this, and gets up, saying she needs a minute. Jax wails that two exes who hated him came, bringing back the Jax who I know and hate. Tom tells Jax to calm down. Ariana takes off her heels, and runs after Scheana. Jax is loud, but just keeps repeating himself. Ariana tells Scheana that he’s upset about his dad, and projecting. Scheana sniffles that she sent him a message about how sorry she was, as the makeup crew works on her. Jax continues to rage, and Kristen tries to get him to calm down. Scheana says she just saw him two weeks ago in Vegas, and he said he was having fun. He wanted to go to a hockey game instead of her show, and she was fine with it. He screeches about her getting angry with him for not showing up at a red-carpet event. Ariana tells Scheana that he’s still yelling. Jax says she can’t keep a boyfriend for more than ten minutes. Ariana tells Scheana to come back when she’s ready. Scheana wonders who he’s yelling at, since she’s not even there. Jax yells about sending flowers. Andy asks if Scheana is coming back, and Ariana explains that her lashes came off. Jax says he got more from people who didn’t know him. Ariana repeats what Scheana said about him being in Vegas, and he says she bugged him about the red-carpet thing, but said nothing about his dad. Tom reacts the way we all would, and drinks from a flask. Jax won’t shut up, and Scheana asks why is this like, harder than her divorce?

Next time, Stassi and Scheana get into it, Billie Lee joins the group, James and Lala argue, and the topic of Jax and Faith returns.

⬆ I was looking at the fashions from the Met gala, and wondered what the hell was on Nicki Minaj’s head. It was my cursor.

🐴 Thoughts on Sunday’s Westworld. Hey, there are no tigers in the Old West; yes, that was Simon, and he’s quite a shot now; and, those Native Americans are going to be bad news for the woman who washed up on the beach, unless the tiger washed up with her and they worship her as queen.

😈 The New Monica…