Category Archives: Uncategorized

Nov12

November 11, 2016 – A GH Funeral, a New Escorpion & a Trio of Quotes

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital – Thursday

Jax wakes up Carly, who feel asleep on the couch. She says for a while, she stopped dreading the day, but it’s here.

Sonny says today is the day, and he’s going to make things right. Nell comes to the door. Carly sent her to pick up some clothes because she didn’t have appropriate funeral attire. She asks Sonny if he wants to talk. He doesn’t.

Alexis tells the alcoholism quiz on her computer that it knows nothing. Sam comes by. She says she was calling all morning, and Alexis says her phone died. Sam tells her that it smells like a bonfire and asks what happened.

At the hospital, Franco asks Elizabeth how she’s doing. She says time hasn’t dulled any of the pain Tom Baker inflicted on her. Franco tells her that she did a great job on her victim impact statement, and thanks her for sharing it. Elizabeth is waiting to hear from the parole board, and he says there’s no way her statement can’t affect things.

Finn goes to Windemere and asks Laura if she’s seen Hayden, and if she was behaving oddly. Laura says she seemed flushed, but nothing too out of the ordinary. He asks if she’s there now.

Elizabeth tells Franco that she hopes he understands why she didn’t want him to stay. He says he totally does, and what’s important is to keep Tom behind bars. He says what they have is special, and he wants her to feel comfortable. She says she doesn’t know how she would have survived without Lucky, and when she lost him, Jason was there. In some ways, Jason put her on the path she is now, by making her feel safe. Brad is cursing Finn out nearby, as he goes through some of the lab’s contents.

Laura tells Finn that Hayden wasn’t there in the morning, and her bed is still made. She invites him in. Hayden pops up saying she was fine last night and still is.

Nell apologizes to Sonny, and he says it’s not her fault; he shouldn’t have snapped at her. He asks about Carly, and Nell says she’s functioning, but not living. She tells him that Jax arrived and stayed at the house with Carly. He says that’s great, but his face doesn’t match his words.

Jax gives Carly coffee. He tells her that Bobbie and Josslyn are making sure everything is in place for the reception, and Nell went to get her dresses. Carly appreciates that Jax loved Morgan like a son. Jax asks about Sonny, but she says when she sees him, she thinks of their bad choices, and sees how badly they failed their son. Jax says none of it is on her. She says it is, because she believed Sonny had changed.

Alexis tells Sam that her oven timer needs to be fixed, but Sam wonders why Alexis didn’t smell anything. Alexis deflects the questioning. Sam asks if she can borrow Alexis’s laptop.

Finn asks what Hayden is doing. He says they need to know if she was exposed. Laura asks exposed to what, and he gives a mini explanation. Hayden says she has to get to work, but Laura says it would be a good idea for her to listen to Finn. Hayden says she’s fine, and Finn says he’s not going anywhere.

Brad complains to no one in particular, saying there’s a Hazmat team cleaning up in the lab. He says there’s definitely something wrong with Finn, and no one seems to care. Elizabeth says she does, and it sounds like Finn might be an addict.

Franco talks to himself about Jason, a guy who kills people, making Elizabeth feel safe. Obrecht overhears him, and he tells her about how Jason makes Elizabeth feel safe and made him leave, Obrecht asks if he expressed his feeling, and he says no. She says she told him not to bottle things up and expect Elizabeth to read his mind.

Kristina comes by Alexis’s place to get her shoes, and talks to Sam, distracting Sam long enough that Alexis can delete the history on the laptop. Kristina says everyone is blaming Sonny when it’s Julian’s fault. Sam says not everyone. She and Jason don’t.

Nell asks if Sonny is still planning on leaving. She says he’s making a mistake and that his family needs him. He says they’re better off without him. He asks if she kept his secret. Nell says yes, but it’s hard not telling Carly. Sonny says he’s put her through enough. Nell tells him that for what it’s worth, she hopes he reconsiders. She goes upstairs, and Sonny looks at a picture of himself and Morgan.

Carly tells Jax that she begged, she pleaded, she tossed an entire gun shipment in the harbor. She knows that Sonny sees violence as a solution, but she lied to herself, thinking she could make a difference. She says she should have known that Sonny was incapable of change. Jax says that doesn’t change the fact that she still loves him.

Laura says if she’s been exposed to something through Hayden, she needs to know, but Finn says it isn’t transmitted that way. Hayden says don’t worry, she’s fine, and she’ll be out of Laura’s life soon. Finn asks her about last night. She claims she was out, but he thinks she passed out. He wants to take her temperature and check her heart. Hayden says she’ll cooperate if he’ll leave, but she doesn’t even make it to the couch before she keels over.

Carly tells Jax that a part of her wants to reach out to Sonny, but she can’t get sucked back in. Now she can see the chances she took, not only with herself, but her children. She’s sorry she didn’t listen to Jax. Jax says no apologies, but Carly says Morgan should get one. Jax brings up a Thanksgiving in the past, and how Morgan sabatoged their cars so they had to spend the day together, and they stopped fighting. She says Morgan is a great kid; he knew they belonged together.

Nell comes back downstairs. She asks if Sonny needs anything else. He says he’d love to be able to hug his son and hear his voice, but that can’t happen. He tells Nell that Carly is probably waiting, so she should go. She says she hopes wherever he goes, he manages to find peace. Sonny gives her the letter for Carly, and says to give it her after the service. She promises she will.

Sam tells Alexis that Danny said the cookies were burning and she was asleep. Alexis makes the excuse that they were watching a boring kids’ movie. Sam says Danny claimed he shook her and tried to wake her. She wonders why even an alarm and smoke didn’t wake Alexis up. She asks if Alexis was drinking while watching Danny.

Finn tells Hayden that he’s reasonably sure she’s been infected. He promises to take care of her and find a cure for them both. Hayden says even if it kills them.

Brad has a jar of something in a plastic bag. He doesn’t know what it is, but he’s going to find out.

Obrecht tells Franco that he needs to find a way to express his feelings about Jason, rather than repress them. Franco talks about Eliabeth being raped, and asks if he’s supposed to feel badly about scaring Sam. He thinks there’s no difference between the sick rapist and the sick illusionist.

Alexis tells Sam that she wasn’t drinking. Sam says the bottle is half gone. Alexis tells her that Laura came by. She explains what Mikkos had done with the estate, and how she had to tell Laura. She says that everything Laura thought belonged to Nicholas and Spencer belongs to Valentin. She says Laura asked for the wine . Sam wonders if Alexis helped her drink it, but Alexis says no

Carly tells Jax that she knows he and Nell got off on the wrong foot, but Nell has helped her a lot. Nell pops in with clothes and shoes. Carly goes upstairs to get ready. Nell asks if she could do anything for Jax. He thanks Nell for helping Carly. She says Carly has been good to her, so no thanks needed. Jax asks if she remembers the circumstances surrounding her kidney surgery.

Sonny takes out his gun. Kristina is at the door, and he puts it back in the box. She says she told herself she wasn’t going to cry, but walking into the house, it hit her that she’s never seeing Morgan again. Sonny asks her to sit down. She asks him why he’s so peaceful, and he says he’s come to a decision. He’s happy that she’s supported him and wants her to make peace with losing her brother. He wants her to thrive and be the best person she can, and find the happiness she deserves. He tells her to live the best life she can live, for him and her brother She asks why it sounds like good by, and asks where Sonny is going.

Franco tells Obrecht that he and Elizabeth have been taking it slow. She’s accepting him for who he is, but Tom Baker’s parole hearing brought up old stuff. Obrecht asks if Tom is going to be let out, and Franco says he’ll make sure he never is.

Brad runs back from wherever they test stuff, and says the jar contained and opioid that’s one of the most tightly controlled substances in the world. Finn having that much in his possession could get him fired. Obrecht applauds, saying Brad finally got the drop on Finn.

Laura tells Hayden that she and Dr. Finn are going to help her. She takes Hayden’s temperature. Finn says they can’t let it get to a life threatening condition. Hayden asks if the exposure isn’t a life threatening condition, but he says it can be slowed.

Sam apologizes for thinking Alexis wouldn’t honor her promise. Alexis says right now they should concentrate on Sonny and Carly. Sam says because of Morgan’s death, she’s become a helicopter mom.

Nell tells Jax that she remembers the car ride, the smell of the room, the sound of the machines, and how she just wanted to go home. Jax wonders why her parents would do this, and she says money; her father couldn’t keep a job, and they weren’t the best parents. Carly comes down. She tells Nell she can dress there, just lock up before she leaves.

Sonny tells Kristina that he’s not going anywhere, but since Morgan died he’s been distant. He apologizes and Kristina says they’re all coping as best they can. It’s not his fault, it’s Julian’s. Sonny says all she needs to know is that he loves her and always will. He says before Morgan died, he didn’t say it enough, and no matter what, he’s always going to tell her how much he loves her. She says she loves him too, and they hug. He tells her to go to the car while he checks on something. When she’s gone, he takes out the gun and says, “Okay, buddy.”

Franco asks Elizabeth why Brad was so concerned about Finn. She tells him that it’s not her business, and she wants to stay away from it. Her phone rings. It’s the prison.

Obrecht calls Monica, saying she has proof that Finn has something that will put the hospital under more scrutiny.

Finn tells Hayden that she’s showing signs of sepsis, and has to get to the hospital.

Elizabeth tells Franco that the parole board took the statement into consideration, and decided to parole Tom anyway. The man who raped her is getting out of prison.

Alexis leaves for the funeral. She gives a lingering look to the wine bottle.

Nell talks to herself, saying she doesn’t know what Sonny wrote, but Carly’s life is about to go from bad to worse.

At the church, Kristina tells Sonny that he was quiet on the drive, and asks if everything is okay. Jax and Carly come in. Kristina tells Carly that she feels lousy, but Sonny feels worse, especially now that Carly strolled in with Jax.

Jax tells Sonny that he’s going to miss Morgan. Sonny says him too. They bro hug.

Tomorrow, Franco is going to stop Tom, Nell gives Carly a letter, and Sonny tells Jax that after today, he won’t be a problem.

General Hospital – Friday

Laura calls for transport to the hospital. Finn tells Hayden she’s going to be okay. I don’t think she’s looking too good though. She stops breathing.

Franco tells Elizabeth that they’ll fight Tom Baker’s release, but she says by tonight he’ll be in Port Charles, staying with his brother.

Jordan and Andre have breakfast and talk about Morgan’s funeral. Julian approaches them and says why drag out the investigation when they all know that Sonny is guilty?

Jax realizes Sonny has a gun. Sonny says he has to protect himself, but Jax says this is the behavior that got them here in the first place. Kristina tells Carly that she doesn’t have to rub Sonny’s nose in it by showing up with Jax, but Carly says he’s there for Josslyn.

Jason meets with the broker. He asks how a bomb ended up in Julian’s car.

Sonny tells Jax that after today, he won’t be a problem for his children anymore.

Hayden’s pulse is back, but thready. Finn brings out a shot of adrenaline.

Franco is stunned, but Elizabeth explains that Tom wasn’t convicted for raping her; he was convicted of another crime. Franco says he’ll stop him before he hurts Elizabeth.

Anna gives her condolences to Dante, explaining that Robin wanted to be there, but had to go back to Berkeley. Griff tells Lulu and Dante that Valentin is Charlotte’s father.

Kiki hesitates to go into the church. Dillon sees her.

Molly, who has a great new haircut, is praying by the votive candles, and Josslyn joins her. Molly says she doesn’t really pray, but it’s the only way to talk to Morgan now.

Kristina asks if Carly stopped to think about how her being with Jax would hurt Sonny. Carly says he has to get through it as best he can. Kristina and Jax leave to check on the other girls. Bobbie tells Carly they’ll get through it together.

Jax questions Sonny, but Alexis comes in and distracts them. She tells Jax that she wouldn’t be surprised if her ex-husband tries to pull something when everyone is at their most vulnerable.

Jordan tells Julian they’re investigating everything. Julian says that’s why he hired his own guy.

Jason asks the broker why Morgan Corrinthos is dead. The contract was supposed to be canceled, and Jason wants to know why it didn’t happen.

Franco says there’s no reason they can’t stop Tom, but Elizabeth says absolutely not. Finn comes running in with Hayden in his arms.

Griff tells Lulu and Dante that Claudette lied to protect Charlotte from her own father. Lulu says no wonder, and Anna tells her that they’re going to do everything to prevent Valentin from harming Charlotte.

Nell says she has something for Carly. We think she’s going to give her the note ahead of time, but she shoves it to the bottom of her purse and gives Carly some earrings that she forgot. Carly tells Bobbie that they were the first gift Morgan gave her that he bought with his own money. Bobbie seems skeptical of Nell.

Micheal suggests where all the kids sit, and Kristina says it feels like they’re being pulled apart. Michael says that Morgan will always keep them together. Nell approaches Michael and gives him kudos. She says they’re lucky to have him as a brother, and so was Morgan.

Olivia hugs Sonny. She tells him he takes on too much guilt, and she and Dante love him. He tells her to take care of their son.

Jordan advises Julian against any outside investigation and interference.

The broker – who looks and sounds like he stepped out of a Rat Pack movie – says he canceled it himself, immediately after getting off the phone with Sonny. He says his guy wouldn’t even have done it like that. He doesn’t have anything to do with bombs and makes things look like an accident. Jason asks if he’s saying his guy isn’t responsible, and the broker says absolutely. Someone else was trying to kill Julian.

Julian asks Curtis what’s up with Jordan, but Curtis doesn’t want to talk about it. Julian tells him make sure nothing interferes with investigation. Curtis tells Julian that he knows what the last call was on Pete’s phone.

Jason wants to talk to the contractor, but the broker says it doesn’t work that way. Jason says it does today. He tells Max to stay with the broker and make sure he calls his guy, and leaves for the funeral.

Kiki didn’t expect to see Dillon. He says he’s surprised himself. He and Morgan didn’t exactly get along, but he never wanted something like this to happen. He asks if she’s going in. Kiki says she doesn’t know; she doesn’t think Carly wants to see her. Dillon says think about what Morgan would want, and she goes in. He waits a beat and follows.

Kiki sits next to Lulu. Dillon sits next to Bobbie. The service begins. We don’t hear it, but only see everyone’s reactions. Kristina gets up to speak. She talks about Molly helping her with what to say, and reads something from the Bible. Dante speaks next, talking about what a great kid Morgan was, and that he’s grateful for the time he had with him. He also does a reading. It’s about forgiveness. Sonny ponders it.

Hayden is finally in a hospital bed hooked up to things. Finn tells Elizabeth that Hayden came in contact with something in the lab. Hayden goes into shock.

Josslyn sings Amazing Grace. Sonny ponders some more. Obviously, today’s theme is forgiveness. Finn and Elizabeth trying to get Hayden under control is interspersed with the funeral. Sonny and Carly look at each other from across the room.

Franco uses the hospital computer to look up Tom’s brother’s address. Because it’s left totally unattended and no one is around. There might be more reasons than one why people don’t want to come here.

Hayden is stabilized. Elizabeth asks Finn what they’re dealing with, and he tells her to keep monitoring her sister and he’ll be back. Tracy asks Laura what happened. Finn comes out and says Hayden is stable for now. Tracy tells him to leave the rest to the doctors. Finn says he’s a doctor. Tracy says because of Brad’s complaints, he’ll probably be banned. He says he’ll take his research elsewhere, but Tracy says he has a reputation. Finn says it’s his fault that Hayden is sick. Tracy asks if she has what he has, and Finn tells her that it’s worse. She was exposed to something more concentrated. He says no one will be able to understand the treatment like he would. Tracy says she has an idea.

At the funeral, Michael speaks. He talks about not being able to protect Morgan, and hopes that Morgan would forgive him. He says they never gave him enough credit for his capacity to forgive. Kiki leaves and Dillon leaves behind her. Michael says Morgan always found room in his heart again for people who did him wrong.

Kiki tells Dillon to go away, but he says he can’t leave her like this. They hug, and Kiki cries.

Michael says he wishes they could all be as forgiving as Morgan, and wishes he was still here. He never had the chance to tell him how much he admired him.

Elizabeth tells Finn that Hayden is stable for now. He asks her to gather the medication they used and arrange for transfer. Tracy is taking her. Elizabeth gets weird about that, but Laura says even if she doesn’t understand, Finn is the best one to treat Hayden. Tracy says Hayden saved Elizabeth’s life, now it’s her turn. Finn thanks Tracy, and Tracy says just prove her right.

Carly goes to the podium. She says the casket is empty. There wasn’t a body to recover, so they filled the coffin with things; pictures, acceptance letter to college, symbols of Morgan’s life, symbols of his potential. He was going to be a great man, but now that potential is gone. She cries at the casket. It’s killing Sonny. Jason comes up and hugs her. This is just miserable.

Jason sits down and Sam asks what happened. He says he thinks he’s on to something that will change everything. Sam says Carly really needed him. Sam doesn’t seem well, so Jason and Alexis suggest she go home. They leave with her.

Curtis tells Julian that Pete was lured away so someone could plant the bomb. He asks if the name Oscar Jessup rings a bell. Julian says no, and Curtis asks if he’s sure.

The priest starts to give the details for the reception at the MetroCourt, but Sonny wants to speak.

Franco calls Tom’s brother, Seth. Using an Irish accent, he says he’s from the parole board, and needs to confirm that Tom will be staying with him and what his address is. He says he’ll be personally following up on the conversation.

Hayden is wheeled out, and Finn calls Tracy the best friend he ever had. He hugs her. She says she’ll see him at the house. Laura tells Tracy that she really sticks her neck out for the people she loves. Tracy says Finn saved her life, but Laura says she thinks Tracy cares about Hayden too.

Kiki wants to go back in. Dillon asks if she wants him to go in and sit with her. She thanks him and they enter together.

Julian says he’s the guy who signs Curtis’s paychecks, so stop wasting time with Pete, and prove Sonny was behind it.

Sonny says his son is gone and he can’t believe it. He knows most of them blame him, but they can’t blame him more than he blames himself. Morgan’s life wasn’t easy; he deserves to be at peace, but that can’t happen because of Sonny. He says there’s only one way Morgan can be at peace, and there’s only one way to make it happen – the only way he knows how. He takes out the gun.

On Monday, Valentin and Doc meet again, Ava thinks it’s just a matter of time before she’s found out, and Sonny takes responsibility for Morgan’s death.

Z Nation

Back on the air, Citizen Z is joined by Kaya in the Skya. They suddenly get a load of feedback, and Murphy comes on. He makes a speech about the new world he’s creating. He says everyone has done what they had to in order to survive. He tells them about the Murphy Miracle Vaccine, and says it’s there for all who are ready for freedom from fear.

Roberta watches Murphy’s compound. Dr. Sun thinks the vaccine can be deluted so that a person is immune, but not under Murphy’s control. Hector spies Murphy leaving. Roberta says he has a magazine and there’s only one place Murphy ever reads. The toilet? Roberta decides to go on her own, and slips into the latrine. Ha-ha! There are two of them with half moons on the doors. One says Mr. Murphy, and the other says Everyone Else.

The zombies start pounding at the door to the Everyone Else outhouse where Roberta is. Murphy comes out, complaining that he can’t get five minutes to himself. One of his cronies tells him that someone cut through the fence. They open the Everyone Else door, but it’s empty and obviously someone has gone out the other side. Murphy says, “Warren.”

Sun asks Roberta how long they’re going to search. Roberta says until they find the Red Hand or the Red Hand finds them. Hector says the Red Hand is crazy even by apocalypse standards. Roberta says they’ll need an army. Hector tells her that they can’t be controlled, and they’ll change her more than she’ll change them. She tells him, so be it.

Sun notices some trash cans are on fire. The three of them slip into what looks like a utility headquarters. They see some people who seem high, messing around with an abandoned car. Hector calls them Enders. Roberta fires a shot and the Enders flee. Escopion is written on the car’s hood and there are bodies in the trunk. Roberta thinks they’re probably the owners of the car.

Some zombies come out of nowhere. While Hector and Roberta are dealing with them, one gets Sun on the ground, but someone shoots him. A guy comes out from behind a wall. He says it’s an odd little stand-off, and introduces himself as Hopper. He tells them that he was just going down the road, and they need to watch out for the Red Hand; their methods are harsh. Hopper explains that he’s the Red Hand’s drug dealer, and just a small time business man. Roberta wants to see Escorpion. Hopper says he’ll take them, for a fee. She draws her gun, and he says okay, no fee.

Kaya figures out that Murphy is transmitting from Spokane. Citizen Z wonders what Murphy is up to.

Hopper says Escorpion had a come to Jesus zombie moment, and decided to bring justice to a lawless world. The Red Hand executes his judgment. They drive to a warehouse area.

They get out of the car and Hopper lags behind. He tells them they’re paranoid. Roberta says he is too, and he says Escorpion wants it that way. He lights up a joint and asks Sun if she wants to partake. He offers her drugs or something stronger, saying she needs a man. He puts his arm around her and she flips him to the ground. Roberta tells him not to pull that sh*t again and helps him up.

Hopper leads them to one of the warehouses and opens a metal door. Roberta says it had better not be a trap. They follow Hopper inside. Hopper leads them down to the basement and through a tunnel. He calls it “underground Seattle.” He says it was a cesspool of humanity until the Red Hand cleaned it up. They go on for what seems like forever.

Screams are heard in the distance. Sun hears a scratching noise, and they see disembodied hands climbing all over the place. Hopper says it’s best they keep moving.

10K is in a cell. He’s brought to Murphy. Murphy says the thing about confinement is that it gives you time to think about the big things, like who am I, why am I here? 10K says he only thought about how much he hated Murphy.

Murphy asks what Roberta is planning. 10K says she didn’t tell him. Murphy opens a safe. He pulls out a vial calling it humnaity in a single injection. If 10K tells him Roberta’s plan, he might get his soul back. 10K says Roberta is planning to smack his ass good. Murphy laughs. He tells his cronie to find 10K something useful to do, and that zombie moat clean up might be a good start.

Hopper leads the trio to a chamber where there are neon signs that say guilty. Underneath, there are men bound up in barbed wire with metal gags in their mouths. One tries to speak, but Hooper throws a switch and electrocutes them. He says, the sign did say guilty. The men turn to zombies, breaking their bonds and going after Roberta, Hector and Sun. Hooper applauds when all of the zombies are dead. He suggests they do that professionally and tells them that Escorpion will see them now.

A phone rings? Murphy gets off his throne and looks around for the source. A phone inside a cardboard box inside a closet is ringing. Murphy answers. It’s Citizen Z. Murphy tells him that Operation Bite Mark has been terminated, and there’s a new mission now. Citizen Z asks about Roberta. Murphy says he doesn’t know what happened to her. He says Merch decided it’s more than she could handle, and he has his own mission now. He tells Citizen Z not to call again and hangs up. Kaya tells Citizen Z, that went well.

Hector, Roberta and Sun are led to another area. Everyone gets on their knees and they’re made to do the same. Escorpion is presented. It’s Vazquez. I say OMG! out loud.

Vazquez tells Roberta he hears she has a proposition for him. She says she didn’t expect to find him here. He asks if they’ve met. She says yes, but it’s been a while. He says she must be mistaken; he’d have remembered her. Vazquez says he knows Hector. He’s one of those men who think they’re better than him. They want the peace he brings, but denounce his methods. He says right now the world needs a mad man. Hector asks if he’s sure he doesn’t remember him, and shows him his tattoo.

Vazquez says he has one just like it. He tells his guards to lock Hector and Sun up. Roberta tells him that she also is on a mission, and together they can get a vaccine for the zombie virus. He says he has his own mission, and she should help him. She says they were on a mission together once. He asks her to tell him about it. She unbuttons the bottom of his shirt. She says he was badly wounded and dying; she was hurt too and he helped her. She some close enough to kiss him, says, and then…and she kisses him.

He calls the guards and says get her out of his sight.

Sun asks Hooper what’s going to happen to them. He says he doesn’t know; Escorpion is unpredictable. He throws Sun into a single cell and tells her that she’s safe – for now. Roberta gets thrown in with Hector. She tells Hector that Vazquez won’t help; he still thinks he’s Escorpion. Hector blames himself for Vazquez going insane, because of what he did to Vazquez’s family. Roberta says he’ll snap out of it and Hector asks what if he doesnt? She says she’ll hill him. Hector says she won’t have to, and grabs her from behind, squeezing her neck until she blacks out.

Hopper wakes Roberta. He asks where Hector went. She says maybe he walked out. Hopper takes her and Sun to Vazquez/Escorpion. Vazquez asks where the other one is, and Hopper says he escaped, but not for long.

Vazquez asks Roberta why she’s really there. He asks what this is, showing her a vial. She says their mission, and tells him about trying to get Murphy to California and how they found the real Escorpion. She says he has to remember; they were doing it as a team.

Hector comes in fighting. Vazquez goes over to Hector, and Roberta asks Vazquez not to kill him. Hector says he’s the real Escorpion. Vazquez says it’s lie, and punches him. Hector tells Vazquez that he was an undercover cop named Vazquez, and Escorpion killed his family. Vazquez says he lies. Hector says they met again in Mexico. He goes through the scenario, and how he remembered killing them .He says he didn’t care about their begging and shot them both.

Memories flood Vazquez’s mind. Roberta says it’s true. Vazquez tells the guys to let Hector go. Robeta sees they’re going to fight and wants to stop it. Vazquez hits Hector with some kind of hammer, and then runs him through with a machete. I gasp. Vazquez says he is Escorpion and wants Hector to say it, but he refuses.

Roberta sees the machete and kills Vazquez with it. More gasping on my part. Roberta tells him that she’s sorry. Everyone just stands around watching this entire thing. Vazquez says he’s sorry too, and calls her Roberta. He asks for mercy, and she says yes, go home to your family. He dies and she gives him mercy by slicing off his head. Even though I’m miffed that they gave me Vazquez back and then took him away, it’s really cool how his head slides off his body as he slides down to the floor.

Roberta drops the blade and goes to Hector. She asks Sun to do something. Sun gives him an injection of the experimental vaccine. They wait for a millisecond. Sun says it didn’t work, but he’s not turning.

Hopper holds up Vazquez’s head, and everyone kneels to Roberta.

Whoa.

We hear Murphy say that there’s a world without fear and zombie bites. They’re taking back the apocalypse one vaccine at a time, and if you can hear him, fear no more.

Doc and Addie come to a clearing in the woods. They look into a backyard where a zombie couple is with a little girl. At first Doc thinks the child is going to get bitten, and then he realizes it’s Lucy. Apparently, zombie children grow at the same rate as children on soap operas, because she looks a lot older than one. A live man comes out of the house and shoots at them.

Hector opens his eyes.

Wow. This episode took me all over the place.

Next time, it’s all about Lucy.

Quotes of the Week

Little Jewish kids love hip-hop. – Marcy Blum, president of Marcy Blum Associates, from the online article Hollywood’s Battle for the Best Bar Mitzvah: $5M Budgets, Justin Bieber and Camels

Instead of letting your hardships and failures discourage or exhaust you, let them inspire you. Let them make you even hungrier to succeed. – Michelle Obama

I respect your jumpsuit, but not its contents. – Tina Fey, as Kate Ellis in Sisters

veteransday

Nov10

November 9, 2016 – Jax Returns, Little LA’s Reunion Heats Up & Kyle Gets His Drag On

Posted on by
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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

In the church, Carly talks to God. She talks about Sonny raising the kids to believe in heaven and that there’s a better place. She doesn’t know if she believes that, but says Morgan must be there, and asks that he be safe and protected. Sonny is in the doorway and hears her. He says he couldn’t protect Morgan.

Maxie is late getting home, but Nathan has candles going already for a romantic evening. He tells her that the last time they tried this, the Claudette/Charlotte debacle happened. This time, no interruptions. There’s a knock at the door.

Nina goes to the bar. Valentin is there and tries to flirt with her. She tells him that she’s putting together a bachelorette party. She sees a baby picture of Charlotte on his phone and he tells her that’s his daughter.

Finn looks at Hayden’s hands and she asks what she just gave herself. Cool. He’ll have a purpose again.

Michael reads an old letter to Nell. It’s from Morgan when he was away at military school. (!) Michael explains that Carly wanted Morgan to be safe, so she sent him away to a military academy. He talks about how Morgan called him Mikey and he hated it, but would give anything to hear him say it again.

Sonny apologizes to Carly for interrupting. Carly tells him that the funeral is tomorrow. She says Jason is right, Sonny isn’t well, and he has other kids to take care of. Sonny says he will, and they’ll understand. He goes on about his Morgan guilt and Carly tells him not to. Griff pops in and tells Carly there’s something she should know.

There’s a mail delivery for Nathan. It’s a letter from Amelia Beaulieu (Claudette’s last name) in Quebec.

Nina says Valentin never mentioned he’s a father, and he says there are a lot of things she doesn’t know about him. He tells her that Charlotte is his pride and joy. Nina starts to tell him about how she’d thought Charlotte was her niece at first, but he shakes his head and says he’s her father.

As the smoke alarm blares, Alexis takes Danny outside. She tells him if she doesn’t come back in a minute, to get a neighbor to call 911. He counts, but she comes back out by the time he gets to 17.

Finn has Hayden wash her hands. He says she touched the same thing that infected him.

Danny asks about the cookies, but Alexis says they’re lumps of coal now, with fire extinguisher whatever on them. Laura drops by, and Alexis makes something up about needing a new oven timer. Laura asks if Valentin has any legal claim to the estate. Alexis tells her they’ll talk after she puts Danny to bed, and takes him upstairs. Laura sees the wine bottle.

Griff tells Carly that he can’t walk away from what he heard, and Carly says it’s none of his business. Griff tells her that Sonny canceled the hit. She says she knows that Griff means well, but Sonny already told her. She says she believes him; he would never lie to her about something this important, but it was still too late.

Nell says it’s clear how much Morgan loved Michael. Michael talks about their childhood, how they had bodyguards and were sometimes sent to a private island when things got dicey. He tells her that all they had was each other. He wonders if the memories count when there’s no one to share them with. (That’s so sad!) Nell tells him to share them with Avery. He blames himself again, and Nell says it was an accident. Michael says it was a series of bad decisions with Sonny’s being the worst. Sonny could have made different choices, but didn’t . Nell thinks back about looking at the note in Carly’s office.

Finn tells Hayden that the virus isn’t airborne, but enters through an open wound. He asks why she was there, and she says she came to warn him about Brad’s complaints. Finn realizes she has a cut on her finger. He says a cut of any size could be dangerous.

Alexis comes back downstairs, telling Laura they can go over the paperwork now. She sees Laura eyeballing the wine, but Laura asks if she can have a glass. Alexis is visibly relieved. She tells Laura that the documents Nicholas was forced to sign are invalid because they’re not notarized, but the ones from Mikkos are, and they supercede any claim that Nicholas or Spencer had to the Cassadine estate.

Nina asks Valentin if he realizes he’s the third father Charlotte has had in as many weeks. He tells Nina that he has a birth certificate, and he’s getting a DNA test. He wants to talk to her over a drink, but she says no. He says he thought she was a more independent thinker, and Nina gets annoyed when he calls her a sheep.

Nathan reads the letter to Maxie. Amelia writes that Claudette told her that if she doesn’t hear from her in a certain amount of time, to pass the enclosed on to Nathan. Nathan tells Maxie it’s official that something has happened to Claudette.

Sonny tells Griff that the truth sets you free, but if he hadn’t started things, Morgan would be alive. He says maybe the call was too late or they ignored it, but it doesn’t matter. His son is dead, and now God is punishing him for the life he’s been leading for as along as he can remember.

Nell says it’s hard to recognize the point of no return until it’s passed. 20/20 hindsight and all that. Michael says when you drag someone else along with you, then you’d better think about consequences before you do what you can’t take back. Carly comes in, and Michael leaves to talk to Olivia about the reception. Carly joins Nell. She says she’s worried about Michael. Nell says that he’s strong and it helps him to handle things. Carly says that she’s leaving Sonny to grieve alone. Part of her wants to run to him, because he knows the pain she’s feeling, but she’s reminded of what she’s lost when she sees him. Jax appears out of nowhere, and says if she needs someone to lean on, he’ll be there.

Laura wonders why Mikkos’s documents didn’t show up before, and Alexis thinks Mikkos was hiding them from Helena. She says whoever was holding onto it after she died must have thought it was now safe to give it to Valentin. Alexis says Helena is dead for real this time, which makes me think Helena isn’t dead. Laura wonders why Valentin murdered Nicholas, and says that Nicholas died for no reason.

Finn gives Hayden some pills. He doesn’t want to be the reason someone else dies from the virus.

Jax tells Carly that as soon as he got Michael’s message, he came straight to Port Charles. Carly says Josslyn will need him. Nell excuses herself, and Carly explains that Nell is her assistant now. Jax goes down Memory Lane about taking Michael and Morgan to DisneyWorld. He thanks her for sharing Morgan with him. She thanks Jax for loving him and giving him a happy home for a while. She tells him go ahead and say that she’s a fool, thoughtless, reckless, and selfish to have let Sonny back in her life.

Griff tells Sonny that God doesn’t work that way. Sonny says He does in the Old Testament. Griff says that’s why He gave us a New Testament, based on compassion and forgiveness. Sonny says he doesn’t deserve forgiveness, and Griff says it’s not his call. If he’s truly repentant, he’ll be forgiven. Sonny says those around him are always punished, and he’s taking responsibility tomorrow. Griff asks what he means.

Jax asks if Carly really thinks he’s going to say, “I told you so,” and she says not really. He says he loved Morgan and is going to miss him like crazy. In the hallway, Nell tells Michael that Jax is there. Michael says he’s glad that Carly has someone to lean on. Michael tells Nell that they have to get something clear.

Griff tells Sonny whatever he says is in confidence. Sonny says he’s always made up his own rules and code. When you’re like that, you’re always running, and he didn’t know if he could run fast enough. Now his son is dead, and he can’t run anymore. He’s done. Griff asks when he last slept. Sonny says he’ll get rest when it’s over, and no offense, Griff doesn’t look so hot either. Griff says his life has done a 180, and he’s questioning everything. He thought the priesthood was no longer his calling, but recent events caused him to reconsider. He wonders if God is telling him to pick up the collar again

Nathan wonders if someone got to Claudette. Maxie reads the letter. Claudette says if the letter is being read, the truth is out. She’s sorry for the lies, but she was only trying to protect Charlotte from Valentin. She says if Nathan is reading this, something has happened to her, and Valentin probably did it. Claudette writes that if Valentin finds Charlotte, something bad will happen, and to please protect her.

Nina tells Valentine about Maxie’s kidnapping, but he says he wan’t involved. He says what if what everyone is saying isn’t true? He would love to tell her everything, and how he would never let any harm to come to Charlotte or her mother, or she can believe what everyone is saying.

Alexis tells Laura that Nicholas died a hero, and to grieve his death, but don’t think it was meaningless. Laura says she’s right, and thanks her. Alexis apologizes for not having better news. Laura tells Alexis that she’s going to pack; she doesn’t want to be there when Valentin comes back. Laura leaves, and Alexis looks at the wine bottle. She puts “do I have a drinking problem” in Spyder Finder.

Finn tells Hayden that it’s like his wife all over again. She tried to get close to him and protect him. Hayden says she’s not his wife, and she’s not going to die. He wants her to get some tests and be monitored. She says nothing is wrong, and he needs to clean up the spill. He throws cat litter on it. Really? On toxic waste? Suddenly, Hayden is gone. Finn runs after her.

Danny comes downstairs. He’s worried about the smoke and Alexis says she’ll keep him safe.

Carly tells Jax she’s glad he’s there. They hug.

Michael thanks Nell for stepping into the middle of dysfunctional mess. She says she likes his family; dysfunctional or not, they’re good people. They say good night. Nell sees Jax hugging Carly. I get the distinct impression that Nell does not approve.

Sonny asks Griff about the priesthood. Griff says he took vows, and maybe if he keeps them, it will be better for everyone. Sonny wishes him luck, and says his father would be proud of him. He asks Griff to come to the funeral, and Griff says he would be honored. He tells Griff to take care of his family afterward, and leaves. Griff looks after him worriedly. Although that seems to be Griff’s natural expression. One of my dogs is like that. He has a perpetual worried look.

Maxie tells Nathan that Claudette lied for her daughter. She says he’s going to fight Valentin and she’s going to help.

Valentin tells Nina that he wishes Charlotte had a mother. Ding-ding-ding! The magic word. He orders a drink for Nina, and she smiles at him.

Hayden runs into Windemere. She apologizes for startling Laura. Laura tells Hayden about Valentin. She says she’s moving out and suggests that Hayden do the same. Hayden says it’s the least of her problems right now. Laura asks if she’s okay, and she says she just had a bad day at work.

Finn calls Hayden. He leaves a message that if she’s infected, it’s serious – a matter of life or death – and begs her to come back.

Hayden starts feeling warm and begins to hyperventilate. She passes out. The wind blows the window shut and the candles go out.

Tomorrow, Sam asks Alexis if she was drinking while watching Danny, Nell tells Sonny he’s making a mistake, and Elizabeth thinks Finn is an addict.

Little Women: LA – Reunion Part One

Gorgeous dresses a size smaller. I love Elena’s hair – she has blue ombre through the bottom half and it looks smashing. We flash back through the highlights of the season. Babies, lotus blossoms, Christy, Christy, Christy, Plastic, f-yous, fingers in faces. Host Kevin Frazier asks them how they all felt about it. Terra says there were highs and lows, and Briana says they’ve grown.

Kevin tells us that we’re jumping right into it, and brings out Matt. We flash back to Matt’s untrustworthiness and the infamous Plastic. Briana says she trusts Matt now, and Kevin asks stupid questions. He asks if the rest of the group believes Matt and crickets chirp. Christy claims the women asked her for proof and Tonya squashes that. Christy admits to being in contact with Plastic, and Matt says it was ages ago; he doesn’t even have any social media accounts now. He adds that he’d like to see proof that he said he has a fetish.

Christy talks about how she met Plastic through Briana, and Briana says Plastic wanted to ride some coattails onto the show. Christy says that Plastic came to her. Kevin says Plastic is going to join the group, and Briana and Matt walk out.

Plastic enters. Matt and Briana lose their mics and decide to leave. They shut the dressing room door behind them. Plastic tells Kevin that Briana doesn’t have coattails to ride, and she became friends with Briana because she felt sorry for her. She says Briana is desperate for attention and tries to climb the social ladder. Although I’m not sure what kind of social ladder this would be considered. Plastic claims to have a bigger career than Briana, but no one has ever heard of her, including me. She tells them that she and Matt started talking online and he started getting inappropriate. Christy says he’s not to be trusted. Jasmine asks about proof, and Plastic claims that when Matt deleted his account, it all disappeared, but that’s not how any of this works.

Kevin asks if Plastic has apologized to Briana, but she doesn’t think she needs to because Matt instigated things. Tonya brings up the photo shoot, and how she was gracious enough to invite Christy, but then Plastic showed up, yapping about things no one cared about. Within seconds, Plastic, Terra and Tonya are all talking at once. Plastic claims that later on, Tonya called up and insulted her about her transness again, and she’s releasing the recordings. Kevin suggests she break out the recordings right now, but like the losers on the court shows, she left the evidence at home. Terra says no way it was Tonya. Kevin asks what Plastic wants out of this.

Plastic goes on about how badly she was treated. She says she wanted to clear her name, not gain notoriety. Kevin asks if Tonya has a problem with trans people. She says of course not. Christy says that she doesn’t think Tonya was thinking when she spoke, and Tonya texted her later, apologizing. Kevin tells Plastic good-by. Well, that was uneventful.

Briana is back, without Matt. Briana says he’s tired of being harassed about their relationship. Kevin asks about her family thinking that Matt is isolating her. He asks if she can understand their concern, but Briana feels that it’s nobody’s business. Kevin tells her Radar Online is all interested in her now, but she doesn’t want to answer any questions. She says she talked about it in the beginning, but it’s not like she’s giving regular updates. Briana tells them that her family heard about Matt’s past and refused to give him a chance. They didn’t even meet him, but still formed a negative opinion.

Tonya admits the ladies weren’t impressed either. Briana says she feels that the girls were coming from a good place, but not so much her family. She isn’t sure about Christy. Christy admits she’d said that she wasn’t going to get involved, but when she met Plastic, she changed her mind. Tonya says they did tell Christy not to talk to Briana’s family. Christy agrees it wasn’t her place, but adds that they were all worried.

Christy says Briana’s family called her because they were concerned. Kevin brings up a court order that the family got to see Briana’s daughter, and asks if they’ll ever see Maverick. Briana doesn’t know, and says the last time she saw her father, it was when he delivered court papers from her ex-husband. Terra says she can see why Briana would feel the way she does. Me too. Who does that?

We take a trip down Memory Lane with the Terra/Christy fight. Charges, charges dismissed, Christy’s supposed concussion, Christy adding her medical records to the party invitation. Joe and Todd join the women. Joe thinks Terra and Christy should stay away from each other. He talks about how the police report affected their lives. Terra says in letting it go, they don’t need to stay friends. Todd agrees.

Terra asks Todd if he realized when he saw the film, that Christy was first to throw a “deadly weapon.” Joe insults them, and Todd says that before they came out, Joe told him he’s high as a kite. Joe tells Todd that he said it on purpose to see if Todd would repeat it, and calls him “Todd-ler.” Christy does the “we were all” hurt thing, and Joe asks why she’s the only one who’s allowed to pull the bully card. Christy insists she withdrew the police report, but Joe says she’s lying. Todd yaps about the medical records, and Kevin just happens to have a copy. He reads it and it’s basically how Christy claims she felt, along with a three centimeter contusion, but no treatment required.

Joe calls them on canceling the report. Elena tries to interject and starts yelling. She says Christy regretted her actions and tried to reverse them. Terra says it wasn’t Christy that stopped things, it was the DA, who said they had no case. Terra calls Christy stupid, and Christy stomps off to get a tissue. Kevin asks where they go from here, and Christy says forward, but they seem to be stuck in the past. Terra agrees that moving forward is the only way. I think they have two different definitions of what moving forward is though.

Matt is dragged back out. Kevin wants us to decide whether Matt or Christy was the problem, and we flash back to Christy getting involved with Briana’s family. If I’m going by these clips, I’d say Christy is the problem. Briana says she needed her friend to respect her. She says the Plastic thing was the final nail in the coffin. Christy says Briana’s family was asking about it. Kevin asks if Briana will ever forgive her, but she says not that behavior. Kevin asks Matt why he didn’t contact anyone when Briana was in the hospital. Matt tells them everything that was going on there, and it sounds like he had a pretty good excuse. Briana says she didn’t want anyone to know.

They discuss the yacht incident where Christy went crazy with name calling. Todd says he knows Christy stepped over the line and she regrets it deeply. Kevin asks where the comments came from. Christy starts talking about how they’d said she was using drugs. Kevin asks why she called Briana autistic and Christy desperately tries to avoid the question, but then admits that Briana’s sister told her that Briana has autism. There is seriously something wrong with this woman. Why would anyone want to be friends with her? And why does she consider autism an insult?

Everyone starts laughing, so I guess that isn’t true? Kevin tells Christy it’s inappropriate and ignorant. Christy goes on about being an addict and how it’s a disease. Terra says it’s not the same thing; you come out of the womb with autism. Christy says she regretted it immediately. Briana says what if she did have autism? Christy says Briana claimed she was popping pills, but Briana says she was referring to how Christy was behaving. Kevin says it sinks to the lowest common denominator when they have fights.

Somehow we get to Matt asking if he’s offended people. Joe brings up the oompa loompa comment, but he’s laughing. Kevin wonders if anyone can argue without derogatory comments, and suggests they get off that level. Jasmine says not with this group. Ha-ha!

Kevin asks Christy about her sobriety. She says she’s been sober for years. He asks if it’s strictly alcohol and she claims she’s never had pills. She says she was just super stressed. He asks if she’s relapsed. Christy says she’s done and walks off.

Next time, Terra accuses Christy of popping pills, the average-sized child argument rears its ugly head again, and Karla and Rhonnie make an appearance.

Below Deck

The crew gets the boat ready. Kyle informs the other deckhands that he’s not into dudes, but he likes transgender women. He’s been dating a trans woman for two years. Kelley says no judgements.

Kate asks Ben how his date with Emily went. He says they had dinner and went for a walk, and asks if they’re doing a morning tally. In his interview, he says he likes Emily, but doesn’t want to share that with Kate yet.

Emily tells Sierra about Kyle’s transgender girlfriend. They discuss if that makes him gay. Sierra is annoyed that he’s been pursuing her when he’s dating anyone else.

The primary guests are Liza and Lori who are best friends in the fashion business. They’re also bringing some gay male friends. They want a beach picnic, and are having a surprise drag show for Liza’s birthday. Kate says Kyle will be excited. In her interview, Kate says it’s funny how life works out. Kate tells Kelley it will be super fun.

Ben asks Kyle about his girlfriend. We see a couple of pictures and she’s very pretty. In his interview, Kyle says he never felt like he belonged until he met her. Ben asks about the physical transformation when taking hormones. Kyle says he figured if Kate is open, he can be too. Ben says it’s a beautiful thing. He seems genuinely curious and respectful, so I can see why Kyle doesn’t mind his questions. I wonder if I can get Valor shirts from the Bravo website.

Kate FaceTimes with Ro, who is annoyed that they can’t spend more time talking. Kate says she’s not used to being in a relationship where someone needs this much attention. She tells Ro she has to get to work.

The guests arrive and Captain Lee tells the crew that it’s show time. Aww! They have two little dogs with them. Kate gives the tour. The dogs aren’t wearing life vests and I don’t like that. The yacht pulls out and I marvel at the blue water.

One of the guests lets Kate in on some surprises he has for the drag show. She tells him one of the deck members has experience. In the galley, Kate tells Kyle all about the sequin gowns and wigs, and he’s psyched.

It’s beach picnic time. I know the crew always hates those, since there’s a lot of schlepping stuff back and forth. Kate decorates the table with shells and it looks beautiful. The captain calls Kelley to the bridge. Sierra is wearing a tiara (ha-ha!) while she helps Ben.

Kyle has decided Sierra is annoying. Sierra complains about Kyle to Emily. Kate tells Kyle to get the guests to the beach, but Kelley ends up taking them. Kyle complains to Emily and Ben about Sierra. Ben tells him to knock it off and Emily just laughs.

The picnic is amazing which is no surprise. Everything is always amazing. Emily and Ben sneak a little kiss in the kitchen. Kelley wants Sierra and Kyle to get over it and quit talking about each other. He tells Kyle to deal with it. He sends Kyle to the beach. Kate trusts the others with the guests and heads back to the boat. Kyle and Sierra take the giant umbrella down together, and Kelley radios to Kyle that now’s a good time. Kyle babbles and Sierra tells him he’s being dramatic. I’m not sure how she can tell, since I can barely understand what he’s saying. They have subtitles, but I wasn’t looking. Sierra calls Kyle a queen and I laugh. In his interview, he says if she didn’t know about his girlfriend she just would have called him a d*ckhead. In her interview, Sierra says she’s never had so much drama from a guy and wonders if it’s because she didn’t respond to him in the way he wanted. Back at the boat, Kyle whines to Kelley and Sierra whines to Lauren. Lauren wonders why Kelley would be so unprofessional as to interfere?

Ben makes a fabulous dinner. Filet and scallops. In the crew mess, Nico puts on a pink wig. I squee when I see one of the little dogs sleeping in a bed. They should dress the dogs up too. I get so concerned about these dogs not wearing life vests, I write something on Below Deck‘s Facebook page.

Ben tells Emily about his brother coming. She’s excited to meet him. She asks if he’s like Ben, and Ben says yes, but more eccentric. The slide is brought out. One of the guys puts on a Grecian gown and waves from a speedboat. Everyone is kind of doing something different and it all looks like fun. Ben is concerned that the conch is chewy, and Kate says it’s like conch flavored gum. Bleh. She says it’s edible, but not ready yet. Because Emily thinks it’s okay, Ben decides to serve it, but the guests think it’s too chewy. In her interview, Kate says I told you so.

The logistics of the drag show are discussed. The main attraction doesn’t lip sync very well. In his interview, Kyle says he can do something he’s good at, and if he has to wear a dress for it, fine.

Oooh! The table is gorgeous! Ben gives Kyle a taste of sea urchin and Kyle suddenly feels lightheaded. Uh-oh, he’s allergic. He starts getting red and asks for an antihistamine. He says he has to be careful with seafood. Why did he eat that then?

The guests sit down to dinner, but Kyle is passing out. Kate says he’s supposed to be in drag, not drugged, and he’s in a Benadryl coma. Kate does his makeup while he’s half-asleep. Ben gets the food going. Kate puts glitter in Kyle’s beard. Kyle sips a Red Bull. She tells him to keep away from flames. He says he looks like he’s been bombed by a Care Bear. The guests are thrilled with dinner. Kate tells them there are fireworks from the mainland tonight, so they’re having dessert on the main deck. This is a ruse to get them upstairs.

Cue the music. Kate tells the guests the fireworks are about to begin. The main entertainer and Kyle do some lip-syncing while Nico dances back-up. A confetti gun is shot. Glitter is everywhere. Nico says it’s all about the tips. It’s over all too quick. I would have liked to see more of that.

In the morning, Kyle still has glitter in his beard. Nico says it looks like he did nasty things with Tinkerbell. Kate makes a wreath out of a pink boa with little white lights in it and places it on one of the beds as a parting decoration. The guest is tickled pink. BA-DUM-CHH!

Time to go. Bye-bye little vestless dogs. Captain Lee gets the envelope and tells everyone good work. It’s time to gather in the crew mess. In his interview, Kyle says he sees Sierra for who she is now. Please. Captain Lee thought everything was perfect. He says the tip isn’t what they’re used to. At first I think he’s joking and it’s more than they usually get, but no. It’s $1,100 each. He says it happens. He tells them enjoy their night out – after the boat is finished.

Ben says his brother is coming and they’re going to get loose. And there he is. Ben says he’s the more reserved. Kate says she’s known James for a while and likes him better than Ben at this point. Ben introduces James around, and James gifts the crew with hand-rolled cigars. He asks how Ben’s cooking is and Kyle says Ben gave him an allergic reaction five minutes ago. James asks Emily how the date was in front of everyone. In her interview, Emily says Ben is more manly and James is more well groomed.

Ben and James go off for a night out. James tells Ben that the yacht is impressive. James sounds exactly like Ben. If I closed my eyes, I probably couldn’t tell the difference. They go out to dinner. Ben hopes for validation about Emily. James says Ben is doing better than he is.

Lauren and Nico start drinking on the boat. Kyle asks Kate if he can sleep in the master bedroom tonight. It has a big, real bed, and a TV, on which he’s hoping to see boobies. Kate gives the okay.. Lauren and Nico goof around in the room and nearly break something. Nico pours more alcohol into Lauren’s mouth.

Kate, Sierra and Emily hang out and talk. Ben and James are headed back, and Ben drops his pants on the dock. James takes a picture. Ben walks to the boat with no pants on. And I mean half nakey. He sheds the rest of his clothes before they get back on the boat.

Nico chugs fireball. Kate tells the three of them not to make a mess and hopes there isn’t another pizza-on-the-floor incident. Kyle thinks Lauren has no respect for the interior. Ben wanders around wearing a hoodie like a loin cloth. Kyle’s quiet evening of boobies has taken a different turn. Ben breaks something in the bathroom and says they’re screwed.

Next time, an obnoxious repeat guest, the captain confines the crew, and Nico and Kelley butt heads.

Nov9

November 8, 2016 – GH & Nothing But the GH

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

🗽 Due to election circumstances beyond my control, there are no new shows tonight. So I was able to catch up on one of my favorites, Intervention, and afterwards I’ll check out the new episodes of Aftermath and Channel Zero: Candle Cove on SyFy. I hope you got out and voted. Despite the crowds I saw on TV, I shared my polling place with only two other people and the cranky-looking ladies checking us in. It was about 100 degrees in there, so I’d be cranky-looking too, if I had to sit there for more than five minutes. No matter which candidate you voted for, you’re a part of history. I learned as a kid that anyone could run for president, as long as they met what seems to me minimal criteria, but I never saw it until now. There has never been an election like this one. And hopefully, there will never be another like this one. Ha-ha! No matter what trite, inane crap was posted on Facebook though, I’ve continued to be proud of the nation that bore me. A nation started from an amazing general, a “rag tag army in need of a shower,” and a bunch of incredibly bright men of questionable character, who made the decision to put their lives on the line for us, even though we weren’t so much as a twinkle in anyone’s eye.

Moving on…

General Hospital

Finn talks into his recorder. He’s rationing his supplies and progress has stalled. He says the same thing is happening between him and Hayden – two steps forward and one back. Finn isolated the pathogen that’s infecting him, but finding a cure is a long shot. Brad walks in. He was hoping Finn would have taken his mystery research elsewhere, but he’s still taking up space in one of the labs. Brad wonders if the whole place is a toxic dump, and picks up the beaker Finn has been messing with. Finn yells at him to put it down.

A board member tells Tracy he objects to putting the hospital’s future in Hayden’s hands. Tracy says the board voted and she has faith in their new administrator. If the hospital is to avoid being sold for condos, Hayden is what they need.

Roger Howarth’s hair looks amazing. Franco asks if Elizabeth wants to get back to her drawing. Or they could do some more kissing.

Alexis consults with Diane over Valentin’s documents. Another client of Diane’s interrupts to talk to her, and tells Alexis her colleagues are rooting for her. When she leaves, Diane calls incoming. Curtis and Julian have walked in. They sit at the bar. The bartender says Carly gave strict orders not to serve Julian.

Jason gets home and Sam asks what happened. He tells her about Pete getting shot and that he’s dead. Sam wonders what he knew, and if someone would kill him to keep him quiet.

Diane tells Alexis that a restraining order is in place and she’s going to loudly remnd Julian. She says Valentin inherits the entire Cassadine estate. Everything that was oging to Spencer is now going to him.

Julian threatens a lawsuit, but Curtis says it’s not the bartender’s fault. Curtis tells the bartender that he’ll order two drinks, and if Carly asks questions, direct them to Curtis. He’ll tell her how the bartender handled everything with tact and grace. Curtis tells Julian that Sam and Jason are also investigating. They also figured out that he’s working for Julian by the process of elimination. He says he and Jason’ paths are going to cross, especially when Julian’s driver ends up dead.

Sam wonders if Pete planted the bomb, but Jason thinks he just turned a blind eye. She asks if it was a bribe or blackmail, but Jason says Pete and the broker might not even know one another. She suggests looking at the phone records and Jason already has them. Jason tells her about Curtis. He says hopefully the records will explain why the bomb was planted even though Sonny called off the hit.

Julian gets his martini. Diane tells Alexis that Mikkos wanted everything to go to the oldest living male. Alexis says Laura is going to be upset, and Spencer is losing even more of his dad. Alexis’s phone rings.

Julian asks Curtis what happened with Pete, and Curtis explains. He wonders who wanted Pete dead and why. Diane comes over and suggests Julian leave.

Sam looks up a number that Pete called last, and it comes up as an escort service. Jason thinks it could be a front.

Franco and Elizabeth talk about art…sort of. Franco says kissing is an art. Elizabeth says if it’s gone when you’re done, there’s nothing left to show for it. Franco suggests creating a masterpiece. He says Romeo and Juliet made art, and maybe they can do the same. Yeah, but they died at the end.

Tracy tells the board guy that she wouldn’t have entrusted the hospital to Hayden if she didn’t think things could be turned around. He says if Hayden doesn’t change things quickly, she’s out. Tracy tells Hayden that it’s going to be an enormous challenge. The entire community needs GH. Hayden promises to do her best. Tracy says if she doesn’t, she’ll run her out of town, even if it breaks Finn’s heart.

Finn says if Brad doesn’t put the beaker down, he’s going to face consequences. Brad suggests he do this somewhere safer. Finn says there’ s a toxic materials sign on the door, congratulates Brad on his nuptials, and suggests he go enjoy his life and put the beaker down. Brad sees that Finn is shaking.

Hayden tells Tracy that this job is a chance to prove herself to everyone, and she’ll leave on her own if she fails. Tracy says prove it to Finn. Hayden insists that train has left the station. Tracy says sees them pining for each other, but Hayden is the one who will have to make a move.

Brad says he knows Finn is a specialist in infectious diseases, and asks if he infected himself. Finn says it’s just low blood sugar. Brad asks if what he’s holding is contagious. Finn says it could be, and if he doesn’t like what Finn is doing, to file a formal complaint. Brad tells him that it’s not over.

Elizabeth reads my mind and says the end of Romeo and Juliet is a downer, so they should just be themselves. Franco says art is a leap of faith and desire, a willingness to latch on to an idea, not knowing if it will end up spectacular. He waxes poetic, saying he wants them to be vulnerable together in an art collaboration. They kiss, and Elizabeth asks him to go upstairs. My excitement is immediately squelched by Elizabeth’s phone ringing. Franco says it might be the boys, and tells her to get it. She looks at the caller ID and says she has to take it.

Sam tells Jason that they’re assuming Pete was in on the Julian thing, but maybe they’re wrong. Jason tells her the number that called when Pete was in The Floating Rib parking lot is blocked. Sam says she’ll see about that.

Julian tells Diane that it’s a public place. Diane says Alexis frequents it. Julian says he’ll talk to his lawyer and Diane says she’ll be glad to argue it in front of a judge. Alexis tells them that she’s leaving. Julian asks about Danny and Alexis tells him to get lost. He says they had good times once, and Diane asks if that was before or after he tried to slit Alexis’s throat? Diane tells Curtis that Julian’s last lieutenant, Carrrlos, met an unpleasant end, so he might want to watch his back.

Brad approaches Tracy about signing off on Finn’s work. She says everyone did; he’s respected and a good researcher. Brad says he won’t butt in again, but he doesn’t want to see people’s lives in danger. Tracy says the murderer was caught. Brad asks how people are going to feel when Finn is face down in some Petri dishes, and if he keeps going the way he is, his next stop is the morgue.

Finn puts some elements together. Oh crap! He dropped the beaker. He wonders where he put the cleaning supplies and leaves.

Elizabeth tells Franco that it was the parole board on the phone. She forgot to tell them she moved, and they were apologetic about the short notice. The man who raped her is up for parole. They think he’s been rehabilitated and is no longer a threat to society. She says he’ll always be a threat to her.

Sam thinks she might have found something. She tells Jason that at first, she thought the number came from a burner phone. Jason doesn’t think it’s a coincidence that Pete got the call when he left the car. Sam tells him it’s an Oscar Jessup. For a second, I mix things up with Oscar on The Haves and the Have Nots, and get confused.

Julian makes a smart remark about Alexis’s drinking. Diane says if he says anything else to defame Alexis, she’ll sue him for slander. He rejoins Curtis, saying he’s concerned about Alexis. Curtis says she doesn’t seem to care, and he should turn his attention to why Pete was shot.

Danny asks Alexis where grandpa is. Alexis tells him that grandpa doesn’t live there anymore, but he loves Danny. She gives Danny some juice, telling him that grandma is having some of her favorite juice too. Ha-ha! Or as Brandi from The Real Housewives of Dallas would call it, Jesus Juice. Alexis tells Danny to put in a DVD while she puts cookies in the oven. He says she’s fun. Probably not when she passes out.

Brad calls Lucas. Tracy suggests Hayden check on Finn. She says the last thing the board needs to hear is that he’s running amok. Tracy tells Brad she’ll talk to Finn, and they all need to work together. Brad says if someone gets sick, or worse, because of what Finn is doing, he warned her. He tells her that he’s not going near there until it’s cleaned up. He’s not risking his life for blind loyalty.

Hayden goes into Finn’s lab. She steps in the mess and gets concerned about her shoes. She tries to pull the glass out of the soles and touches it with her bare hands. Okay, I didn’t mention this, but Hayden got a paper cut earlier, and now I see why they focused on that. Finn is about to come in and Tracy calls. She asks if he’s working with substances that could put people at risk. She tells him that she sent Hayden to check on him. but he says she’s not there. They hang up, and Finn enters the lab. He asks Hayden what she’s doing, and she tells him that she’s trying to save her shoes.

Elizabeth tells Franco about being raped when she was 15 by a guy named Tom Baker, but that’s not why he’s in prison. He tried to blackmail and underage girl by threatening to put doctored pictures of her on the internet, making her look naked. Her family had him put away. Elizabeth was allowed to make a victim impact statement when he was up for parole before. Franco asks if she’s going to make another statement. She says the hearing is first thing in the morning tomorrow. He’s been a model prisoner, even counseling other inmates, and is considered not a threat to society. Elizabeth tells Franco that Tom Baker is a predator, and she wants him put away for as long as possible. Franco says they’d better get started then.

Jason tells Sam that Oscar sounds familiar, but can’t place the name. Sam says maybe it was from back when he worked for Sonny. Jason says he called Pete during the window when the bomb could have been planted. Jason tells Sam that maybe they’re looking at this the wrong way.

Curtis wonders if Pete was double crossing Julian and put the bomb in the car. Julian says it’s possible, but whoever shot him wanted to shut him up, so Sonny has another death on his hands. Julian tells Curtis, no commentary.

The cookies are done, but so is Alexis. She’s passed out.

Elizabeth wants to work on her statement alone. Franco asks if she wants anything. She says no, and he l gets ready to leave. She starts to cry and he holds her.

Jason wonders what if somebody else planted the bomb. Geez, I’ve wondered that from the beginning and he’s supposed to be the professional. Sam says it’s possible. Julian has a lot of enemies.

Curtis tells Julian that he’s inclined to agree with him, but no one can say Sonny hasn’t suffered. He’s responsible for his son’s death.

Tracy joins Diane, who congratulates her on getting the hospital open again. Tracy says she’s not celebrating until she’s convinced the hospital will recover.

The guy from the board sits next to Julian at the bar. He tells Julian that it will take a lot to get the hospital out of its financial hole and Julian is going to get his wish. Julian says, luxury condos, here we come.

Finn tells Hayden to drop the glass. He wants to see her hands. He’s freaking out.

The smoke alarm goes off at Alexis’s place. Alexis wakes up and asks what’s burning. She remembers the cookies and calls for Danny.

Tomorrow, Michael blames himself for Morgan’s death, Hayden is scared, and Alexis looks for Danny in a smoke-filled house.

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Nov8

November 7, 2016 – Morgan’s Death Poses a Mystery, Vanderpump Rules Again, the OC’s Reunion Claws Come Out & an Atlanta Mention

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

We go back to Jason grilling Pete, and Pete falling to the ground after a shot is fired from somewhere. Jason calls 911. He goes through Pete’s pockets and takes his phone. Curtis appears, saying that’s one way to get rid of evidence. Jason says for all he knows, Curtis is the shooter. Curtis says he has the best alibi in the world, having just gotten his ass handed to him by Jordan. He says Jason was just talking with the only person who could implicate Sonny and now he’s dead.

Carly visits Sonny. She tells him that she found something important. She gives Sonny Morgan’s journal. She shows him how Morgan kept track of taking his medication. Sonny says something isn’t right. Morgan’s handwriting starts to become sloppy, and his thoughts are disjointed. Carly says there must have been something wrong with the medication.

Ava gets a text that someone (the caller ID says “Blocked”) knows what she did to Morgan. Lucy startles her and she says there must be another alleyway she’d like to skulk in. Ava says she’s meeting someone. Lucy says what a coincidence; she’s meeting someone too. Right now. She tells Ava that she saw her and knows what she did to Morgan.

Elizabeth has to ask Franco for a favor. She tells him that he’s inspired her, and she signed up for an art class. She shows him her sketch portfolio, and he says they’re really good. She’s very excited, and wants to make sure she stays in pace with the class. She wants Franco to pose for her.

Lulu shows Dante chocolate hand prints on the shirt that Maxie had to call in favors to get for her. She tells him if he’s going to get “his” son hopped up on sugar, at least teach him to wash his hands. Actually, if she wears that in Manhattan tomorrow, everyone will want one by next week.

Griff tells Valentin to stay away from his daughter. Valentin says it’s a misunderstanding, and Charlotte is his daughter.

Curtis tells Jordan if he’s rolling in the gutter, he’s in good company because she’s there with him. She starts to slap him, but he blocks her hand. Andre comes in and Curtis walks out.

Dante pours some wine for himself and Lulu. She says she was disappointed about not having another baby, but she’s over it. Whenever she sees Rocco, she knows how blessed they are. They have their son and each other. She can’t imagine how Sonny and Carly feel right now.

Griff says Charlotte is his daughter, and Valentin says they’ll see. Griff goes back to the table and Anna gives him the paper. Uh-oh. The look on his face isn’t happy. I had the feeling that Valentin was really Charlotte’s father a while ago.

Ava tells Lucy she’s nuts, and Lucy says that Ava is so busted. Lucy says she was in the neighborhood brokering a sale. She looked over and saw Ava and thought something didn’t add up. She wondered what Ava was throwing away. (I forgot about that!) She says that Ava looked guilty as hell while she looked for a trash can, and she just had to know. Imagine her surprise finding medication that belonged to Morgan.

Carly goes through the journal with Sonny. Sonny says it’s normal to go up and down, but not spiral. She shows him an entry about Bobbie’s birthday and another when he stopped himself from popping the guy who bothered Kiki. She says after that, something changes, and he’s obviously depressed. Sonny says he was manic, and she points out that every day he took his pills. She wonders why they weren’t working. Sonny insists he must have stopped taking them.

Jason talks to the cops, telling them he was talking to Pete when he got shot. He says he didn’t know Pete personally, but he used to work for Julian.

Jordan gives a condensed explanation of her conversation with Curtis to Andre. She says they share a lot of history. It’s scratchy at best and painful at worst, and Curtis knows how to push her buttons. Andre says he finds Curtis irritating. He was hoping to steal Jordan away for a quiet dinner. He says he’s going to attend Morgan’s funeral, and there’s a chance that Sonny, Carly, or both will unload on him. Jordan says she’d dreading it, but it’s a necessary evil. He says offering condolences while searching for evidence might seem hypocritical and Jordan says not to call her a hypocrite.

Franco asks if she’s going to share the drawing with her class. Dhe says they critique each other, and asks if he’s shy. He says in the art world, he’s a controversial figure, and the students might know they’re in a relationship if she shows them the sketch. He asks if she’s okay with that.

There’s no DNA match with Charlotte and Griff. Anna says she’s sorry. She says Claudette was obviously trying to protect Charlotte. Valentin approaches, and Charlotte runs to him. He tells her he’s happy to see her. He says he missed her, and she says she missed him too. Anna suggests she work on her drawing while they have an adult conversation. Valentin shows them Charlotte’s birth certificate. He says even though he wasn’t married to Claudette, he wanted Charlotte to have his last name.

Lulu and Dante eat Rocco’s Halloween candy. Lulu says to imagine dealing with the tantrum when Rocco realizes it’s gone. Dante gives her a piece of candy and she unwraps her old engagement ring. He says he wanted to get her another one, but he knows how she is about recycling. She says she doesn’t want another one. He asks her to marry him again.

Elizabeth says it’s okay with her if the class knows they’re in a relationship. Franco asks if she has any spray tan, but she says he can keep his clothes on. She wants to do a portrait. He asks why she was worried to ask him. She says in some ways a portrait is more intimate, and conveys the subject’s innermost thoughts. He says he trusts her even with those.

Jason and Curtis discuss the case. Curtis threatens to tell the cops about Jason taking the phone. Jason doesn’t care. Curtis says he’ll keep his mouth shut if he can look at it.

Lucy tells Ava that she found the lithium prescribed to Morgan. She says Ava took up with Morgan again, and maybe she’s the reason he was in the car. She says that Ava was tossing the evidence, and good luck convincing Carly and Sonny that she wasn’t. She asks what Ava thinks they’d say.

Carly tells Sonny that Morgan had written in a check mark for every day he took his medication. Sonny says that’s no proof. She says Morgan didn’t understand why it wasn’t working. Sonny says maybe he was covering his ass in case somebody read it, but Carly says it was private; there was no reason not to be truthful. Sonny says he’s going to check the medication and goes upstairs. Carly sees the envelope with her name on it. Sonny comes back downstairs and she asks him what’s up with the it.

Anna tells Valentin a birth certificate could be faked. Valentin pokes himself, drawing blood, and gives it to her on a napkin. This guy doesn’t fool around. He says he’s sure Charlotte will be safe with her in the meantime. he apologizes to Griff for the whole thing, and Griff gets testy. Anna says back into your corners until the test is done.

Lulu talks about how she and Dante found their way back to each other. She says even when she was steaming mad at him, she loved him. She tells him that she’ll marry him. Even though they’re already married. They kiss.

Franco poses as Elizabeth draws. He keeps talking and she keeps telling him to shut up. He gets up to look, and she says she knows it’s not good. He tells her she’s hot when she’s wrong, and that it shows vision and intent and boldness. She says she wishes she was bold in her life, and he tells her that she is.

Jordan says she’s tired of people making assumptions; she has a job to do. Andre says he was just kidding, and he hopes she finds something to close the case. She apologizes for overreacting. She says Curtis got to her, and she should know better. Andre says Curtis has an agenda every time he crosses her path, and he doesn’t like how Curtis makes her question herself. She says isn’t it true that only she can make herself feel a certain way? He says he’s not her doctor, but he thinks she’s cool and they kiss.

Ava tells Lucy not to do it, and Lucy says give her one good reason. She says Ava took off with Morgan, and this time it lead to his death.

Sonny blows off the envelope and tells Carly that the lithum is missing. Carly says that was the most important drug he was on.

Franco (who I almost called Todd) is getting antsy. Elizabeth puts her sketch pad down and moves to the couch.

Curtis looks through Pete’s phone. He wonders if any of the numbers are Sonny’s. The cops talk to Jason, and Curtis thinks about calling Jordan.

Andre tells Jordan that even a superwoman needs sustenance, and he wants to take her to a new Thai place. She leaves to get her stuff, and Curtis calls her phone.

Ava tells Lucy she can’t tell them; she’ll only hurt them more. She says they should remember the good times, and not be questioning Morgan’s behavior. She tells Lucy that Kiki is barely getting through, and it could destroy her. Lucy says she should have thought of that before. Ava asks how Lucy would like it if someone hurt her daughter this way.

Carly tells Sonny that it doesn’t make sense. Why carry a whole bottle? Sonny says if Morgan thought it wasn’t working, maybe he threw them away. Carly asks why keep one bottle and not the other?

Anna tells Griff that no matter what, the priority is protecting Charlotte. Valentin leaves.

Lulu admires her engagement ring and says it’s nice to have it back where it belongs. Dante says he was a little worried that she’d turn him down. They kiss some more.

Ditto Elizabeth and Franco.

Curtis starts to leave a message for Jordan, but Andre picks up the phone. He tells Curtis that the best thing he can do for Jordan and himself is to leave her alone.

The cop asks if Jason saw Pete get shot. He says nothing is missing, so they’re ruling out robbery, but wonders about the cell phone. Jason says it will turn up somewhere. I guess it doesn’t occur to Officer Barney Fife that a guy who worked for Julian could have been killed for his phone.

Lucy tells Ava that she won’t squeal about her tossing the meds, but she’s hanging onto the pills for safekeeping. Ava asks if she’s going to use them for blackmail, and Lucy says she hadn’t thought of that, but thanks. Lucy tells Ava that maybe she should consider coming clean, since someone else night have seen her.

Carly tells Sonny something feels off. Sonny says if Morgan thought the meds weren’t working, its the one he would have tossed. Carly says something is missing. Sonny says the medication isn’t why Morgan died. Carly puts on her coat. She says she can leave the journal, but he tells her to take it. She says Morgan loved them – it’s on every page – and wanted badly to make them proud. They should have done better, making sure he knew how much they loved him. Sonny tells her she’s a great mom and never failed. She says she did, but it’s too late because he’s gone. She leaves and Sonny is alone again.

Tomorrow, Elizabeth asks Franco to go upstairs, Diane tells Alexis that Valentin owns the estate, and Finn catches Brad in his lab. (Yay! Brad is back!)

Vanderpump Rules

Giggy! Why does Kristen look like she’s going to throw up in the opening credits?

Arghhh! Tom S. has a man bun. Things are hopping at SUR. Britney is now working there and it looks like that’s working Jax’s last nerve. He feels like his world has closed in. Please.

Scheana and Lala are at odds again, but Scheana is feeling like the rest of them are all working well together. Katie thinks Britney is fitting in, and it’s a better job for her than Hooters. Well, let’s hope the tips are bigger.

Lala has a small part in a Nicholas Cage film. In her interview, she talks about starring in her own porn film, and tries to make the title a play on words, failing miserably. Katie is trying to keep Lala and James out of her life, since they tried to ruin her engagement party. Britney discovers that the girls can’t talk and text at the same time. Peter has gotten a shave and a haircut and looks totally different. I’m not sure I like it.

Kristen is dating a new dude named Carter. She’s happy, since she doesn’t have to pay his bills. Kristen thinks she should wear a fake engagement ring when she goes out, but Stassi suggests that she wants to convince people she’s not a psycho.

Lisa is happy with James’s behavior. He’s been keeping his drinking and temper under control. Since his father moved back to London recently, she’s concerned that he’s going to get emotional and start drinking again. We flash back to some of James’s finer moments in alcoholism.

Jax talks about coming home to Britney and Kristen kissing, and not on the mouth. Tom says there’s no lack of bi-curious Southern girls in West Hollywood, but wonders why those two had to get together. He calls it the LA handshake. Really? This group never ceases to amaze me with their shallowness and lack of ambition. I don’t know if it’s the time period or the coast, but when I was their age, my friends and I were much further along in life. And a billion times smarter.

Lisa tells Jax how well Britney is doing at the restaurant. He agrees, but wishes they weren’t on the same schedule. Tom tells Lisa about Kristen and Britney, and Lisa thinks it’s bizarre even in their world. Jax says something about karma, but Tom says if karma was a real thing, Jax would be dead by now.

The gang gathers at Skybar for the OK! Magazine party. Schwartz feels like there’s a vagina mafia going on where he can’t voice an honest opinion. Kristen is annoyed at Jax for broadcasting things about her and Britney. She talks about how she’s made out with all of the girls. When Britney gets there, she insists it was nothing but kissing, and tells Jax to knock it off. In her interview, Britney talks about moving all the way from Kentucky and missing family and friends, and how she can’t imagine life without this group of girls now. I feel sorry for her if this is the best friend group she can get.

Tom tells Ariana about Kristen and Britney. Ariana says you can’t go to sleep around Kristen or that’s what might happen. She and Tom get ready for the party in the ladies room at SUR.

Schwartz is happy that Jax and Stassi are getting along. Jax says they’ll never be besties, but they have a rapport, and I’m surprised he knows what that means. He tells Stassi about Britney and Kristen. I’m already tired of this story. James and Lala show up. Lala says they always roll as a pair. They finally had sex and are over it, but they’re best friends now. For now.

They try to join the others, and Katie tells them they’re not at the table. James hovers around, taking their liquor. Katie tells Lala it’s not normal to want to hang out with people you’ve been talking smack about. Jax won’t even shake James’s hand, telling them to move along to another table. Lala says no one has been working on their summer bodies and James rudely asks Katie if she’s pregnant. Scheana smacks the glass out of his hand and tells him to get the blip out.

They leave, and Jax takes off after James. This didn’t take long at all. We’re only 23 minutes into the program. Jax doesn’t care if he goes to jail; he just wants to hit James. Stassi thinks Lala and James are aliens who have shape-shifted into humans. I hadn’t thought about that; maybe she’s right. Tom and Ariana arrive, and immediately get the news about the two idiots name calling everyone. Ariana says she just saw them, and they gave no indication of being antagonistic. Schwartz says they’re acquaintances and not friends, so who cares? Katie is annoyed at him for not being supportive. Translation: not wanting to kill them.

James is drunk already, and drinks to Schwartz and Katie. In his interview, Schwartz is tired of Katie expecting him to inherit her grudges, and says she’s backslid since Stassi came back. Tom goes over to James and asks wtf? He says James’s biggest enemy is himself and everyone knows how to push his buttons. Tom says he would have smacked James’s drink out of his hand too. He tells James that he’s like a Tourettes of insults. OMG – is that a pipe cleaner shaping Tom’s man bun? James keeps trying to justify everything. Tom says his parents are divorced too, but he doesn’t use it as an excuse to be a d-bag. James says he thought that his parents were going to get back together and starts crying. For the second time – please.

Katie tells Ariana she has a friend who’s passed along the information that Lala has a sugar daddy who’s married with kids. Ariana says she’ll treat it as a rumor until she knows for sure. Ariana goes over to Lala and says she cares about her. Lala is drunk already too, and basically makes no sense. She says she’s done and starts crying, saying it’s not what she came here for and walks away. If this isn’t what she came here for, why did she start it?

Katie isn’t thrilled with Ariana being friends with Lala. Tom and Ariana leave because Tom can’t deal.

Katie visits Lisa to talk about being her assistant. Lisa wants to start with her working six hours a day. In her interview, Lisa says Katie has been an exemplary employee, and she could use some help. Katie tells her about Lala and James calling her fat, and lets slip that Lala’s boyfriend has a wife and children. She tells Lisa how disgusting James was. She says she’s made a lot of allowances because of his parents and Max, but he’s pushing boundaries.

Jax and Britney have a new place since the studio got kind of tight. They talk about James and Lala. Jax says he’s never had so much hate toward somebody. Britney isn’t happy with Jax talking about her and Kristen. In her interview, she says she and Kristen did not hook up. She tells Jax that she’d better not hear about it again. In her interview, Britney says if he can’t shut his mouth, she’s going back to Kentucky and out of the relationship. Like she can’t do better. About a million times better.

Schwartz tells Katie that even if things don’t work out, they have to stay together for the dogs and the apartment. The girls are coming over, and he wonders if he should be social or go into hermit mode. Stassi tells Katie happy first wedding conversation. She’s brought special bedazzled cups for everyone, and is going to make festive bridal cocktails that she garnered from Pinterest. Katie has pretty much nothing planned except for her dress.

They talk about the previous night and Katie says she thought it was a bad dream. Stassi and Schwartz talk about pooping their pants and how it wasn’t as bad. Did I really just hear that? Everyone is tired of hearing about how James is going through a hard time. Stassi thinks that he and Lala only use 5% of their brain power. Schwartz is concerned that Katie and Stassi being friends again is making Katie a mean girl. He calls it a hater’s ball and says he’s not one of them.

Lala tells James that what happened last night was not okay. Lala talks about Scheana and I tune out. She and James discuss the other girls. Lala says she likes to call Katie “the blob” because she’s “blobbish.” Get that girl a dictionary, stat!

Lisa wants a talk with James. She asks what happened at the party. James acts like he was the soul of tact and friendliness, but Lisa isn’t buying it. He says he’s compelled to be an a-hole because they like to see him crumble. What? Lisa thinks he lashes out when he doesn’t get approval and acceptance, and doesn’t understand there are boundaries in life. She tells him she doesn’t get why he says he doesn’t care about them, but then won’t leave them alone. She asks how she’s supposed to put him back in SUR when he keeps acting like a little a-hole. She says it’s become difficult for her to defend him and make excuses.

Next time, James apologizes to Katie, Schwartz wants a pre-nup and the Britney/Kristen story continues.

The Real Housewives of the OC – The Reunion Part One

Subtitle: Beautiful dresses on ugly people.

I’m not crazy about Meghan’s off-the-shoulder number. While Atlanta sparkles and NJ shines, this group is very monochromatic. Everyone picked a solid color and went with it. The earrings are huge and cool though.

Andy starts with Vicki. He asks if anyone is medicated, but Vicki says she only took a thyroid pill. He talks about Vicki’s apology tour and how in the end, Vicki found herself where she started. We flash back to all that. In thinking about it, I don’t believe Shannon ever really moved on from the cancer thing. In Ireland when they were getting along, they were just drunk. Andy brings up Brooks, and Vicki asks, who? She says she was at a place when she was busy and she didn’t really pay as much attention as she should have. She says he’s a bad guy and she learned a lot. Heather brings up something Vicki said, and Vicki says there was a time when she thought he was her soulmate, and it was just drunk talk in Ireland. Vicki says she’s in a different place now, and they didn’t know Brooks like she did. She admits everyone was right and she was wrong.

Shannon says she’s steadfast in her belief that Vicki knew Brooks was lying. She claims Vicki told her that she had lied, but Vicki says don’t go there. Andy asks Kelly if defending Vicki without knowing her was a mistake, but she says no.

Andy asks why Shannon won’t forgive Vicki. Shannon says she has, but it doesn’t mean they need to be friends. Vicki tells her to get off her show. Ha-ha! Shannon says she had defended Vicki in the beginning, and Vicki says she told Shannon to call ding-dong. None of us, including Shannon, have any idea what or who she’s talking about.

More on Vicki, and how she was out, then in, then out again. Andy asks Shannon if she and Vicki will ever be friends again and Shannon says never. Moving on.

We flash back to Tamra’s training and her relationship with Mia, her trainer and spiritual adviser. Tamra says her halo is crooked, but since her baptism, her life has gotten a lot better. Andy brings up son Ryan and asks if she blames herself for his problems. She says somewhat, since he’s a product of his environment. Andy asks about her daughter. She still lives with her father, and occasionally responds to a text. Tamra is getting along with Simon now, and attributes it to their son moving back in with her. She says since accepting Jesus, her outlook on life is different and she’s more forgiving. She talks about still being imperfect. Kelly isn’t impressed, and says Tamra is two-faced, nice one minute and talking about her the next. Tamra says she was nice, until she couldn’t put up with Kelly’s crap anymore. Kelly says Shannon can’t own anything, although I don’t know how she got in there. Tamra redirects the conversation back, and says she was nice to Kelly until she brought up Tamra’s daughter in Ireland. We flash back to their altercations and when Kelly called Tamra a dumb f***. Kelly excuses that by claiming it was because Tamra didn’t understand what she was saying. Because we always clarify things by calling somebody a rude name.

The talk turns to Meghan’s pregnancy. She isn’t having a C-section and hopes to give birth naturally. The rest of the women aren’t so sure that will happen. We flash back to Meghan’s best IVF moments. Meghan gets emotional watching. They talk about Jim being absent for most of it, but Meghan says he has a job, what was he supposed to do? Andy asks Heather if Terry was more involved, but she says no. Kelly says Michael gave her the shots because she couldn’t do it herself. Heather tells us that her frozen embryos are immortalized in the frosted glass of her lovingly designed window. Andy asks if he can buy one.

They discuss Meghan’s disappointment at not having twins. She says it was hard and she was hormonal, but she’s lucky that she got pregnant at all with a healthy baby. A viewer wonders if Meghan will have the same love for her step-children as she will for her own baby. Meghan says the bond will be different, but she’d throw herself in front of a bus for any of the kids. She’d probably throw Vicki under the bus too. BA-DUM-CHH!

After the commercial, Andy says welcome back like we went somewhere. Next up is Kelly. We flash back to Kelly’s ups and downs with her husband. Andy says he thinks she’s one of the most polarizing Housewives ever. He asks how she thinks she came off. She regrets how she treated Michael, but has no regrets about anyone else. You can hear a pin drop. She talks about how Michael became controlling after their daughter was born. Andy asks what she’s learned seeing her marriage play out on TV, and she thinks it was therapeutic. Andy questions Tamra, who thinks if Michael was diagnosed as a narcissist, it’s impossible for their marriage to improve. Kelly asks if she has a PhD in psychology, and I wonder if the test came from the internet.

Oh yay, we’re covering Shannon’s 70s party. We flash back to Shannon’s friends being excessively nasty to Kelly, and Shannon kicking Kelly out of the party. You! Who? Ha-ha! It was like an Abbot and Costello sketch. Clips of the subsequent bomb of a lunch follow. Shannon makes some excuse for the two idiots she invited. Shannon tells Kelly not to flatter herself that she’d waste time setting Kelly up. Kelly wonders why Shannon would shove drinks down her throat too.

The remark that Vicki made to David is brought up, as well as a discussion on who got in whose face first. While Vicki did walk over to David, he started it. Shannon makes excuses for David, and Meghan doesn’t think he was out of line. She says maybe it’s the millennial in her, but she wants to be treated “like any other man.” No comment. Kelly says that Shannon should have asked her friends to stop harassing her. Andy says it did seem like they were gunning for Kelly and Shannon has to agree. Of course she adds a “but…” Kelly says that Shannon wanted to hear the gossip and did nothing to stop it. We flash back to Shannon digging for the details. Shannon makes more excuses.

A viewer asks if Kelly regrets the low blow about David cheating, and she says no. Shannon says that Kelly doesn’t fight fair, but Kelly says if Shannon wants to fight, she’s going to fight dirty, now that she knows Shannon’s character.

Andy asks why Shannon accused Kelly of cheating. Shannon says there was a rumor that she was with a married man. She says the guy was living with his wife, and Kelly talked about being engaged during her separation from Michael, the guy’s family was damaged. Shannon says she broke up a family by having an affair. Apparently the guy’s wife and Shannon did some talking. Kelly tells her to blame him. In deciphering this, it sounds like the dude told Kelly he was separated, but still living in the same house, which is sadly common nowadays. Kelly certainly wasn’t hiding their relationship.

Shannon asks what she could possibly gain by lying about Kelly, and Kelly says drama. Shannon says she’s opinionated and sometimes that comes with drama, but she doesn’t manufacture it. She say she hopes Kelly is proud of herself. Andy makes annoying faces during this exchange, like he’s chomping at the gossip bit.

Next time, part two, Kelly suggests replacing Heather’s nickname “fancy pants” with “bossy pants,” Briana talks about her lupus diagnosis, Vicki tells Shannon to calm down, Kelly calls Heather hideous, and Andy pounds his scepter on the ground and yells at everyone to stop it.

👠  A short word about The Real Housewives of Atlanta. Since they decided to squeeze this in on my already full Sunday night, I only jotted down a few takeaway points. Kandi has had baby Ace. He’s a real cutie and apparently a good baby. Neither Chateau Sheree nor Moore Manor is finished, although Kenya has moved in to her home. Sadly, she and Matt are having problems, and it sounds like he needs a little anger management. Kenya is also having a “soft opening” housewarming party, and next week, Porsha is showing up as an uninvited guest due to Phaedra’s plus one.

 

Nov7

November 6, 2016 – Two Cursed Hearts on Once, a Not Yet Broken Daryl on Dead & Continuing Conflicts on the NJ Reunion

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

Once Upon a Time

A breeze blows through the bedroom as Snow and David sleep. Suddenly, Snow finds herself in the middle of the forest. The Evil Queen asks if she remembers her 15th birthday. She got a pony that was just another loyal subject and she’d said it was her best day ever.. The Evil Queen says Snow’s father always made sure Snow got more than she wanted, and now the queen wants what she’s always wanted – Snow’s heart in her hand. She says since David has half of Snow’s heart, she wants that too.

Snow says there’s a protection spell on both of them. The Evil Queen says they’ll hand their hearts over willingly. She shows Snow something terrible in a bottle. She tells Snow that they have twelve hours to figure it out or the whole town will get a taste of it. The Evil Queen disappears, poof! in a puff of purple smoke, and Snow examines the bottle.

The Evil Queen tells Zelena she’s finally getting her revenge on Snow, and David will be thrown into the bargain too. Zelena asks if Rumpel is helping her. The Evil Queen says they’re old friends.

Back in the day, Snow sells a piece of jewelry because she needs the cash…er, coppers. David looks for his mother’s lost lamb (is his mom’s name Mary?), but can’t find it. She says the way things are going, they’re going to have to admit defeat and sell the farm. David goes off to find a buyer for the farm. He’s going to the same port town that Snow is.

In the forest, Snow tears down a wanted poster with her face on it, and the Blue Fairy warns her to get out of the way. They nearly get creamed by an ax. Snow says it’s the Woodcutter, who is als oa bounty hunter. Snow says the forst is no place for her. She’s sold everything and has just enough to get away from The Evil Queen. She’s heading to the nearest port town.

In Storybrooke, Snow explains the bottle of trouble to the others. Emma’s hand shakes. She tells them that the Oracle said things could change as they went along, but the only certainty is her death. Regina tests what’s in the bottle on a tree. It goes all weird, loses it’s leaves and gets bigger. She says it’s water from the River of Lost Souls, and it proves that the Evil Queen is working with Gold. She says if Snow and David don’t give the queen their hearts, she’ll destroy the whole town. Snow wonders if this is the path to Emma’s death. David tells her not to give up. She says she’ll never do that, but the Evil Queen might have finally gotten them.

David’s dog, Wilby, brings him a cup. Wilby leads him to a tiny carriage. A traveling merchant comes out and says David has his cup. He says he was sleeping there so no one would find him. It turns out they’re going the same way, so the merchant offers David a ride. He’s not really a merchant though.

The Blue Fairy tells Snow that everyone loves her, and that love is the most powerful thing of all. Snow says love doesn’t hold its value and she can’t afford to invest in it. She says what can change her life is a ticket out. The Blue Fairy tells her to be careful, and that danger can seem harmless at first.

Fast forward, and Belle wishes she could help, but she’s looked through all her books at can’t find anything to counteract the water. The Blue Fairy, known as Mother Superior in Storybrooke, joins them and says she has nothing either. She thinks there might be some magic to imprison the Evil Queen in a sapling inspired by true love. She believes it’s lost somewhere in Storybrooke. She tells them that there’s a beckoning spell, but it won’t be invisible to Gold and the Evil Queen, so it will be a race. Regina says there might be more between the queen and Gold than just business. Regina says she’d always had chemistry with Rumpel and they can use it to their advantage.

Zelena gets a note from the Evil Queen to meet her at Gold’s shop. Regina peeks out from around the corner and watches Zelena enter. Zelena sees Gold in the back of the shop making out with the Evil Queen. The Evil Queen tells Gold that they should take it somewhere more comfortable, and Zelena says, yeah, like a bed of lies, and walks out.

The Evil Queen blocks Zelena’s path. She says she didn’t say anything because she knew Zelena would be jealous – the proof being in her green neck. Zelena says she’s tired of the lies. Gold sees the note, and the Evil Queen realizes that Regina wrote it. Gold says they’re being played.

Mother Superior makes a rainbow that shows them the way to the sapling.

Way back when, David and the merchant walk through the forest. David feels woozy after drinking some water, and the merchant tells him he shouldn’t take drinks from strangers. David passes out. Snow comes through the forest and hears something in the shrubs. Wilby comes running out and then she sees the Woodcutter’s ax. The Woodcutter tells her that the dog is good at finding strays, and Snow spits in his face. He says he’s not going to kill her, he’s just taking her the the queen for the reward, and the queen will kill her.

In the present, Snow tells David it’s good to be on an adventure with him again. Regina finds a trap door near a path in the forest. She opens it, asks if they’re ready, and the three of them disappear, poof! in a cloud of purple smoke.

Hook tells Emma that her parents will be fine. They’ll find that baby tree thing and fix it. He reads from Henry’s book. It says David and Snow always found each other, no matter what the Evil Queen did, and even when they couldn’t, Emma made sure they did. Hook says they were born of her love and she can overcome anything. He tells her to remember who she is – the product of true love.

Wilby licks David’s face (true love’s kiss? ha-ha!) and he wakes up. David runs to the carriage. Snow is trapped inside. She tells David that the Woodcutter will be back any second and he needs to go. David starts banging at the lock.

Back to the future, Snow, David and Regina find the sapling. Snow and David uproot it and flash back to all of their adventures. Regina hurries them along, but the Evil Queen arrives. She steals the sapling and Snow says it won’t work for her. She breaks it in half and it turns to dust. She tells them to hand their hearts over, but David says they still have time. The Evil Queen says she’ll see them at the cemetery soon enough – it’s a good place for endings.

Back home, Snow tells David that they can’t let the town die. He wishes they could have saved the sapling. They talk about a shared memory where each thinks the other wasn’t there.

In the Enchanted Forest, the Woodcutter finds David trying to break the lock. They fight. Snow grabs the Woodcutter’s arm through a hole in the door and they’re able to kill him. David wants to free Snow, but she says she’s made some enemies. If he sees her face, he’ll have a target on his back. He says he’ll leave, and she can free herself. He asks what she’s doing alone out in the woods. She tells him that she’s trying to survive and not doing a good job of it. He thinks she’s resourceful, and tells her about having to sell the farm. She says she has money and wants to give it to him. He tells her that she needs it herself, but she says maybe she is resourceful, and makes plans to rob a corrupt nobleman. She tells David that knowing he believes in her makes her not alone. She gives him the money, and a little glowing thing happens. The sapling is born.

The Evil Queen tells the townspeople she’s glad they accepted her invitation. If Snow doesn’t show up in five minutes, she’s going to give them some water from the River of Lost souls. Zelena makes a snide remark to Belle about Rumpel making a deal with the queen.

Snow and David arrive. The Evil Queen says she knew they’d show up, even without the sapling. Snow says they know their love is more powerful than anything she has. They’re willing to make the sacrifice. Snow says their paths always go back to each other, and then to Emma. David has Regina remove the protection spell.

Snow and David stand before the Evil Queen holding hands. She’s all happy. She takes their hearts out and the townspeople let out a collective gasp. The Evil Queen says she’s dreamt of this moment forever. She wants to give Snow her pain. the pain of being alone. Since she couldn’t kill her, she’s come up with something more cruel. S returns their hearts. Snow falls to the ground, and disappears, poof! in a cloud of purple smoke. The Evil Queen tells David that since he always finds Snow, start looking and see what happens when he does.

Belle visits Gold’s shop. She tells him that Zelena told her about him and the Evil Queen. She says she doesn’t care what he does and who he does it with, but she does care about the shears. She says Gold intends to use him on their son, but he doesn’t get to tamper with their son’s life just to keep him from hating his father. She says she knows he’s better than that, and he does feel love and could be a good man. If he wants his son’s love, don’t take it, be worthy of it. Gold asks what if he fails. Belle says that’s him all over – fear of failing, which is worse than being evil; he’s too weak to be good. She leaves, and Gold is mighty pissed at Zelena.

David drives to the woods to look for Snow. Emma follows in the VW. David finds Snow in a case made of branches. He removes the top. Regina has come along, and says she doesn’t think it will work this time. David kisses Snow and she wakes up. They remember the first time this happened, and David falls over.

Regina says that the queen put a sleeping curse on Snow’s heart, so they share the curse. When one is awake the other will be asleep. Snow says they’ll never be together. Yeah, but they’ll never argue either.

Next time, Snow tries to break the curse, and Regina thinks they can trap the Evil Queen  behind the mirror, but she and Emma get trapped instead.

The Walking Dead

I would love watching King Ezekiel every week, but it doesn’t look like that’s the deal tonight.

Dwight is watching Who’s the Boss reruns, while he does shots with his girl, Sherry. Alrighty then. Dwight carves chess pieces. Bread is baked. Bartering is done. Negan kicks someone’s ass. Dwight writes down the number 39. He seems to have contraband pickles and condiments. Somehow, a chicken sandwich is born.

Dwight eats while watching some guys play weird games with the zombies. One zombie is stuck to a flagpole and just keeps sliding up and down. I guess the chicken has run out because Dwight makes a dog food sandwich. Oh wait. That’s for Daryl. Well, at least it’s probably loaded with nutrition. Daryl is also naked and I get a little distracted.

Alone in a small, dark cell, Daryl hears a way-too-loud song and I turn down the TV. Dwight brings another sandwich. He watches as Daryl eats. Daryl starts to sleep and the song starts up again. Dwight pops in with a sandwich. How many does he get a day? Daryl is all shaky and weird. Dwight brings in his crossbow and drags Daryl out.

Dammit! They gave Daryl clothes. They look like scrubs with an anarchy symbol on the shirt. Dwight take Daryl into a building to a Dr. Carson. Well, maybe he’s not a doctor, but he’s playing one. Sherry is there and recognizes Daryl, but Dwight says not to talk to him. Sherry tells Dwight it’s negative, and he says maybe next time. She tells Daryl to just do whatever they say.

The doctor checks Daryl out. He says Daryl will get better, and Negan will take care of him. Dwight smirks. Negan sees them in the hall. He wants to talk to Dwight. Daryl sits in the hallway until Dwight drags him out again.

Daryl watches the reindeer zombie games. Dwight tells Daryl that’s him unless he’s smart. He can be like them, or Dwight, or the zombies. He tells Daryl to make it easy on himself, and throws him back in the dark. He tells Daryl that he was rebellious at first too. The song plays again and I start laughing this time. It’s something called Easy Street and it’s very peppy.

Negan tells Dwight that Daryl is going apesh*t and some people are harder to break than others. Negan says since Dwight is doing a great job, pick who he wants as long as she says yes. (Well that’s good of him.) Dwight says he’ll pass and Negan is shocked. Dwight says he hasn’t earned it yet. A voice comes over the radio, saying they have an orange situation. A thief named Gordon has gotten away, and Dwight responds that he’ll meet them at the gate. Negan says he doesn’t have to do grunt work, but Dwight says he likes it. Dwight is so up to something, I wonder how Negan doesn’t see it.

They need to stop the torture, because I start laughing every time I hear that song now. Dwight is off on Daryl’s bike, so some other dude brings his sandwich. Along with another play of the song. OMG – stop it – hahahahahaha! I can’t take it anymore. It reminds me of the time a friend of mine put a token into a jukebox by accident. For whatever reason, it played the opposite side of the song we wanted and it wouldn’t stop. We would be talking, and every time the song would end, we’d wait…and then it would play again and we’d laugh hysterically. Finally, someone went over to the jukebox and kicked it a good one, and it moved on.

While I’m cracking up, Daryl manages to sneak out. I guess he stuck something over the door lock. Cool! Dwight comes across zombies with limbs cracking off as they try to crawl. Dwight pushes the bike along railroad tracks and past an accident. He takes it all in, and almost gets crowned by a zombie falling from the bridge above, then ends up nearly getting bitten by another one.

Back at Neganville or whatever it’s called, Daryl is confronted by Sherry. She tells him that he won’t get away, and when you’re bad, Negan will be worse. Daryl goes to the outside door and sees a line of bikes. He makes a run for them. Uh-oh. Caught. Surrounded. And here comes the man of the hour with his baseball bat. He asks if Daryl is pissing his pants yet. No, but I’m going to from laughing if he puts that song back on again.

No surprise, Negan is all smiley. He asks each man who they are and they all say Negan. He tells Daryl that he’s everywhere, and it was his last shot at realizing that fundamental truth. It sucks, because his life was about to get easier. He doesn’t think that Daryl gets it. Daryl has three choices: you work for Negan as a dead man; work for him and wish you were dead;or work for him, get a brand new pair of shoes, and live like a king. There’s no door number four; it’s the only way.

Negan almost hits Daryl with the bat, but Daryl puts his hand up to block it. Negan says he loves how Daryl doesn’t scare easy, but it pisses Lucille off; she finds it disrespectful. Lucky for him, she isn’t feeling thirsty today, but Negan is definitely getting a drink. He walks off whistling as the guys beat the crap out of Daryl.

Dwight continues on with a flat. He sees a zombie in the distance attacking someone. It’s Gordon. Dwight drops the bike, dispatches the zombie, and whacks Gordon.

Someone says Daryl’s name, It’s Sherry. She says, in the woods after they took his stuff, she said she was sorry. He’d told her she was going to be, and now she is.

Dwight asks Gordon if it was worth it. Gordon says just let him go, and Dwight says he can’t. Gordon asks why, since they used to be friendly, and Dwight keeps telling him to shut up.It’s revealed that Sherry was Dwight’s wife, although Dwight says not anymore. He tells Gordon to keep walking, that there’s nowhere to go anymore – everything is Negan’s or will be. Gordon says it’s okay if Dwight shoots him; he wants him to. Gordon says he can’t go back. Dwight says it’s the only way. Gordon says that’s what Negan wants them to believe. There’s only one of him, so why are they giving up?  Dwight says they were losing. Gordon says when they got there, they thought it would be okay and they could fight the monsters . He drops to his knees and Dwight tells him to get up, and that he’ll dig up Gordon’s dead wife and feed her to the crows if he doesn’t. Gordon says that Dwight won, but there’s nothing left. Gordon gets up and they start to walk again. Dwight shoots him in the back.

Sherry is having a smoke in the stairwell. Dwight asks her for a cigarette. Where are they getting those? Are they growing tobacco? He asks if Negan is good to her, and she says yes. She asks if Dwight is happy, and he says yes, but doesn’t sound like it. He says he did the right thing, and it’s better than being dead. Better than being a zombie maybe.

Oh no here it comes again. ♫ Easy street…da-da-da-da ♫ Daryl gets his sandwich. Dwight tells Daryl that he got his friend killed and he got Tina killed, so don’t pretend he doesn’t know the score. He should be dead, but Negan took a shine to him, and he shouldn’t forget he’s lucky. Dwight sticks a picture on the wall. and says don’t forget. Daryl swipes it down but then looks at it. It’s kind of dark and I can’t really see it, but I think it’s Glenn’s smashed in head.

Thank God. They finally play something different. Roy Orbison‘s Crying. Both Daryl and Dwight lsiten on opposite sides of the door. Daryl weeps. Dwight leaves before he starts.

Dwight brings Daryl to Negan. Negan tells Daryl he looks awful and they’ll have Carson fix him up. He says Dwight hustles and he likes hustle, but things weren’t always cool between them. He says Dwight’s sis fell behind on points because she needed lots of medication. Negan had wanted to marry her and take care of her because he’s a stand-up guy, but while he was thinking about it, Dwight stole the meds and took off with the girls. He couldn’t let something like that stand; there are rules. It cost him a lot going after Dwight, and he still got away, but he saw the light and came back to ask forgiveness. Negan was okay with it, but Lucille is a stickler for the rules. Dwight begged him not to kill Sherry, so he was just going to kill Dwight, but Sherry said she’d marry him instead. It was a start, but not enough, so Dwight got the iron, and then Negan married Sherry. After all that, Dwight still got on board. Negan says he’s a top guy, and they’re totally cool. He tells Daryl that he’s ready to be that guy.

All Daryl has to do is answer a simple question. Who are you? Daryl is quiet, and Negan asks if he’s overwhelmed by the awesomeness? Negan asks him again, while brandishing Lucille, who are you? Daryl answers, “Daryl.”

Negan smiles and tells Dwight that it’s cool. Daryl made his choice; it’s not his problem if it’s a dumbass choice. Daryl is thrown back into his cell, and Dwight says he’s going to wind up in that room or hanging on the fence. Daryl says he gets it. He understands why Dwight took it; he was thinking about someone else, which is why Daryl can’t.

Dwight ponders things outside, while watching the zombie Olympics or whatever that is going on. I almost feel sorry for him. He sees Gordon as a zombie, and it looks like Gordon recognizes him.

Next time, Rick sees Negan again, Michonne is ready to fight, and Rick tells the group that he’s not in charge anymore.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey – Reunion Part One

Beautiful dresses and Teresa looks stunning in a black strapless number. Andy asks about Joe #1, and Teresa says he’s working on his GED and wants to go to college when he gets back. Andy talks about the last reunion she attended, and he wondered at the time if she would be back. She says she’s surprised Jacqueline is there, and Jacqueline says she loves confrontation. As evidenced by her running away from every single one

Jacqueline talks about getting along with Dolores and Siggy. Siggy says she loves everyone. They talk about Dolores’s growth and how she became an independent woman this year. We flash back on how heavily she was counting on Frank, the best ex-husband in the universe. A viewer asks if Frank wasn’t in a relationship, if they’d get back together, but it’s a no. They talk about her son Frankie being hot, and her new management of the gym. They discuss Dina, and who she’s friends with now. Dolores talks about being friends with Caroline, and how it might have contributed to her and Dina no longer being close.

We flash back to the ups and downs with Jacqueline and Teresa this season. How do I detest Jacqueline? Let me count the ways. Andy asks if Jacqueline thinks Teresa has changed, and Jacqueline gives a vague “in some ways” answer. Siggy says Jacqueline’s intentions are good, but her delivery is horrible, and that Teresa is the opposite with no filter. They talk about Jacqueline calling Joe #2 and dragging him into things between her and Teresa. Andy asks if Jacqueline thought Melissa was threatened by the friendship? It doesn’t take long before the three of them are all talking at once. We flash back to Jacqueline’s criticism of Teresa buying a car after she got out of prison. Teresa says they paid back their restitution, and leasing a Lexus isn’t that much, which I’m sure is a matter of perspective. The bottom line for me is that unless someone is paying my bills, they have no business talking about my financial decisions.

Commercial break with important information. Below Deck is on Wednesday this week.

Apparently, Teresa had tweeted that she would like Danielle Staub back on the show. She thinks Danielle would be a great enemy for Jacqueline. Danielle had asked on Facebook if Teresa understands now how it felt to be called names in front of her children. We’re treated to a flash back of Teresa calling Danielle a “prostitution whore,” and flipping the table.

They talk about Siggy and Dolores’s friendship. They’ve known each other the least amount of time, but seem closest. We flash back to a bunch of Siggy stuff. Siggy talks about her family’s move to Israel when she was in high school, and how she came back to America for her senior year.

Jacqueline’s family life is discussed – Ashlee’s engagement, Nicholas’s breakthroughs, and Jacqueline becoming a “glamma.” Jacqueline talks about her new grandson. Teresa and Melissa are whispering and Andy breaks it up. Teresa says Jacqueline talks all about family, and then allows her daughter to say nasty things on Twitter. We see a tweet from Ashlee about Teresa, calling her an ape. Huh? Teresa tells Jacqueline that her daughter needs to learn respect. Jacqueline tries to drag Gia into it, and Teresa tells her to compare what Ashlee puts online to what Gia does. Ashlee has been crazy rude over the years, and I’d hazard a guess that Gia is a nun in comparison.

Joe #2 joins the ladies. Andy talks about what great mothers all the women are, and we flash back to various scenes with the various kids. It’s amazing that most of these kids turned out halfway normal. Andy asks if Teresa gets Jacqueline’s position better after being with Nicholas, and Teresa says she realizes it’s difficult. They talk about Milania, who can be a real loudmouth, but also very sweet. Jacqueline gives her props for how wonderful she is with Nicholas.

We go back in time, watching how Melissa developed her business and the conflicts she had with Joe #2. Andy talks about Joe’s crumb comment being sexist, and Joe says he was raised a certain way. He talks about Melissa giving him sloppy Joes from the can when they were first married. Melissa says that he’s definitely evolved. A fan points out that Melissa had been arrested for shoplifting twenty years ago (when she was a teenager? really? someone’s bringing this up?), and she talks about going through a rebellious period. Derek has quit Envy, but Melissa says it had nothing to do with him selling stories. They talk about Kim D and who told who not to shop where or go to whose events.

Jacqueline acts like Kim D isn’t that bad, but we flash back to her gossiping about Teresa right to Jacqueline. A viewer asks about Teresa not liking that Jacqueline asked her about tabloid rumors, but it not bothering Teresa when Siggy did. Teresa says she didn’t know Siggy. Andy doesn’t get it, but I do. What she saying is that Jacqueline should have known better than asking if something was true, but Siggy wouldn’t have known that, so it was an innocent question when she asked.

Andy says it’s nice to see Teresa and Melissa getting along, and they agree. We flash back to Teresa coming home. It’s such a beautiful, human moment, not matter how you might feel about these two, they’re still people and they’re still a family who love each other. We flash back to Joe #1 leaving. Teresa talks about being away from her daughters. Andy asks them about visiting Joe #1 and Melissa says she most likely won’t. She talks to him on the phone and he has a huge family who all want to see him. We learn that Joe #2 lost his virginity at the age of nine and Teresa walked in on it. Thank you for that visual.

Because Teresa and Melissa are getting along so well, Jacqueline brings up the sprinkle cookies from ten Christmases ago. We flash back to the history of discord between them. Melissa asks why Jacqueline likes to examine their family problems. Jacqueline says they keep implying that she was involved in Strippergate, and Jacqueline says let’s talk about the facts. Teresa infers that it was Jacqueline who did some stripping. I’d also like to know why Jacqueline feels the need to be so involved with the interpersonal relationships of people she’s not related to.

After Teresa insisting that Jacqueline is the one who was once a stripper and Jacqueline saying she wasn’t, we flash back to when that club guy claimed Melissa worked for him (she was a bartender). Now that they’ve jogged my memory, Jacqueline stirred the pot during that whole thing. Melissa tells Jacqueline her hands aren’t clean. Teresa says Jacqueline and Kim D have been tight since day one. Jacqueline says they play dirty and does Melissa think she’d really do that to her? Melissa says she’s not in denial about Teresa, but Jacqueline didn’t show up to the reunion, running away from any responsibility. Melissa says she thinks Jacqueline felt guilty and didn’t want to face her. She says the number one person who caused it was Kim D, but Jacqueline likes situations to happen to other people, taking the attention off of herself. Andy says Joe #2 is the real stripper and Joe wants to know what’s wrong with strippers.

Jacqueline talks about who was going to be at the reunion and how it was toxic, so she avoided it. Teresa says Jacqueline has done numerous things to hurt her and her family. She says that Jacqueline is the one who gave the tabloids a story about Joe #1 cheating. It’s interesting – we flash back to see Jacqueline asking Teresa leading questions and Teresa basically saying she’d kill Joe if she caught him cheating. Jacqueline tells Teresa she’s crazy. Teresa says she’d never put up with it and Joe #2 backs her up. Teresa says Jacqueline’s first husband cheated on her, and somehow it gets to Dolores not having liked Jacqueline for a long time prior to this season, which Dolores denies.

Teresa says Jacqueline is a liar, and Jacqueline says that Teresa went to jail for lying. Teresa says she pled guilty, but Jacqueline set her up. Teresa says Jacqueline and Caroline were behind everything, even calling the government. Siggy says Jacqueline truly loved Teresa at one time. Jacqueline is aghast, but Teresa says she’s glad she got it off her chest and believes it in her gut. Jacqueline says no wonder Teresa is so angry at her.

Next time, extra housewife Chris wants Teresa, Joe #2, or both to take responsibility; Melissa tells Jacqueline she has crazy eyes; Siggy tries to be peacemaker – no doubt unsuccessfully; and Dolores says to light a candle, because that thing is dead. She could be referring to quite a few things here.

Nov5

November 4, 2016 – Take Your Pick: a Couple of GHs, Z Nation Politics, Quotes, a Recommendation or All of the Above

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital – Thursday

Carly asks Nell to hold her calls. Sonny walks in to her office.

Jason asks Curtis what he found on Sonny. Curtis says he’s just following leads, and Jason asks what he’s got.

Dante tells Lulu they have someone in custody she’s been thinking about for a while. It’s Daphne.

Nina asks Maxie when she was going to let her know that Charlotte wasn’t her niece. Imagine her surprise when she found out from Griff. Maxie says Claudette lied to all of them. She knows Nina is disappointed, but she’ll be Georgie’s step-aunt soon. Nina says she wants to know what’s happening when it involves her baby brother. Maxie says she’s been busy having just been kidnapped, and since Nathan had to save her, he’s been busy too. She tells Nina that The Beard was after Claudette, and no doubt he’s tracking her down now. Nina says karma is a bitch and so’s Claudette. Maxie says she kind of feels sorry for Claudette; it’s a bad move to cross Valentin Cassadine.

Griff calls from work to check up on Charlotte. Nathan approaches the desk, and Griff says he knows it’s awkward. Nathan says it was Claudette who lied to him, not Griff. He tells Griff that someone has been asking questions about Charlotte. Griff asks who. Nathan tells him that child services is concerned about how she’s being taken care of. Until her birth certificate is found, she’s a ward of the state.

Valentin tells Anna he’s been expecting her. He introduces himself, and she says they’ve met before, haven’t they? Valentin says not unless it’s in a past life, and Anna asks why he’s been expecting her then. He says he’s investigated her background and lists her credentials. He asks what she wants. She tells him she wants a direct answer to a simple question – why is he here?

Lulu asks how they found Daphne. Dante says she was in Auckland using a phony passport and Robert had her sent to Port Charles. He wants Lulu to be in on the questioning.

Jason tells Curtis that they want the same thing- the truth. Curtis says Jason just wants Sonny exonerated and tells him not to front. Jason says he’s not fronting; he just wants honesty.

Sonny asks for privacy, but Carly says they have work to do. He says it won’t take long. He’s set up a foundation in Morgan’s name for kids with mental illness. He tells Carly that maybe she can get some contributions at church. Nell leaves, and Carly looks at the paperwork, saying Sonny can’t afford to give this much. He says it’s the right thing to do. She reminds him of how he opened the hospital wing when Stone died and he had to make sense of the tragedy. She says there’s no making sense of this one. He can start a hundred foundations, but it won’t bring Morgan back or absolve Sonny. Sonny says he knows that and found another way to clear his conscience.

Carly asks what Sonny means. He says he’s been going back to church and he’s hoping that it brings him peace. Carly hopes so too. He asks if she means it, and she says she does. He says he’d like to say a few words at the funeral, and she tells him of course. He says take care, and leaves.

Outside, Nell tells Sonny that the foundation is a beautiful idea and Morgan would be proud. He says he wishes that were true.

Griff tells Nathan that Charlotte is his daughter, and if she gets taken away from him, how can he protect her? Nathan tells him to take a DNA test immediately.

Anna asks what Valentin’s intentions are. He says he wants to reconnect with his family. Anna says he’s had years to do that. She asks again why he’s there, and he asks if she’s always so suspicious, and why she thinks he’s there.

Dante and Lulu go into the interrogation room. Lulu tells Daphne that they have questions. Daphne says she’ll tell them anything they want to know. Lulu asks why she was on the island, and Daphne says she lives there. Lulu says no one has lived in the house for years. Dante asks why Valentin hired her, but she says he didn’t; it was Helena. She paid Daphne to come to the island. She wanted Daphne to bear her grandchild. That’s right. Helena just picked out some random woman for this job. Okay.

Curtis says Jason would bury any evidence against Sonny. Jason says Julian wants Sonny put away. Curtis says his job is not to tell the client what they want to hear; if Sonny is guilty, he’s guilty. Jason asks what Curtis has on his phone. Curtis says he’ll save Jason and his hacker friend some trouble, and shows it to him, saying that’s all he needs.

Carly tells Nell that since there’s no body, she’s asked Michael and Dante for some of Morgan’s personal effects. She says he was proud of himself for getting into Vanderbilt and framed the acceptance letter. She says it’s in Sonny’s house and asks Nell to get it.

Griff says he doesn’t need a DNA test; he knows he’s Charlotte’s father. Nathan says once he gets one done, he can have his say. Griff wonders if that won’t alert Valentin.

Maxie tells Nina about Valentin trying to kidnap Claudette. Nina says he was amazing… until Curtis arrived and they looked at his phone. Maxie thinks Nina might need police protection. Nina says revenge is the last thing on Valentin’s mind. Maxie asks if she saw him.

Anna tells Valentin that when someone with his record decides to visit the city, she likes to know their reason for being there. He says all of the charges were dismissed, and thinks there’s something she’s not telling him. Anna says the WSB was infiltrated by some members of his family, and asks if he is who he says he is. Until five years ago, there was nothing indicating he even existed.

Daphne tells Dante and Lulu that her brother worked as a guard on the island. Helena’s eldest son had passed way, but she still had an embryo. She set Daphne up, paying all of her expenses, and all Daphne had to do was carry the embryo to term. Lulu says she’s the child’s mother. She asks where her child is, but Daphne says there isn’t one. She never carried the embryo. When Helena came back from Paris, she said the deal was off. Daphne says it was as if she was defeated. Lulu asks if she used someone else. Daphne tells her that Helena said the embryo was no longer viable and had been disposed of.

Nathan tells Griff that the DNA test might raise red flags, but if he doesn’t get it done, child services will take Charlotte. Nathan leaves, and Griff asks a nurse how long it would take for test results. She tells him 90 days, and he asks her to find Brad Cooper.

Anna tells Valentin there’s no one to verify who he says he is; Helena and Victor are both dead. He says he’ll consent to a DNA test. He tells her that he’s the product of an illicit affair, and other than a scribble in a diary, there’s no proof he exists. Anna says he’s quite connected, and either has a crack legal team or a maleable judge. It would be inconvenient if she discovered and exposed his contacts. She tells him that it’s about public safety, but he says she ripped the veil off the threat. She asks him to leave Port Charles without making trouble, or she’ll make trouble for him. She says she’d believe him if it wasn’t for Nicholas. She tells him that she knows his type. She’s sorry he was treated cruelly by his family but the minute he got power, he inflicted cruelty on others, which makes him no different than the rest of the Cassadines. He’s a forgotten, insignificant little man lashing out at the world, because his daddy didn’t love him. Wow. He tells her to shut up.

Jason tells Curtis that the connection is flimsy at best. Curtis says the chemicals used aren’t available in this country, but they are near an island owned by Sonny. Jason says it’s still no connection, and Curtis tells him not yet.

Sonny talks to Diane on the phone. He says he needs his whole family taken care of – now. He hangs up, saying his family will never have to see him again. He sees Nell in the doorway.

Anna asks Valentin if she touched a nerve. He apologizes for the outburst. I thought he was pretty restrained, considering. She tells him that her advice is not to stick around, and he advises her to avoid his family as a topic of conversation. She says she’s come to put him on notice and she did. If someone gets so much as a paper cut and she thinks he’s behind it, she’ll have him locked up. She suggests he leave Port Charles. After she’s gone, he throws something at the door.

Maxie wants Nina to get a bodyguard, but Nina says she’s overreacting. She says they’re not going to tell Nathan. In true soap opera fashion, Nathan is suddenly there and says, tell me what?

Lulu asks Daphne if Helena might have given the embryo to someone else. Daphne says Helena was never quite the same, and kept saying that Stavros wouldn’t live on. An officer comes for Daphne, and she tells Lulu that she’s sorry for her loss. Lulu tells Dante that now they know what the envelope meant. If Helena couldn’t use the embryo, they couldn’t either, and she wanted them to know it.

Jason checks on Carly. She hugs him and thanks him. She says Sonny wants to speak at Morgan’s funeral. Jason is surprised, and Carly says she is too, but she wan’t going to say no. She tells Jason about the foundation. Jason asks if the figures are correct and says it’s a lot of money. Carly says that’s typical of Sonny to clear his conscience that way. Jason wonders if something else is going on.

Sonny asks how much Nell heard. She says most of it. He asks what she thought she heard. She doesn’t want to speculate, but thinks it might be legal trouble because of the accident, and he might skip town. She says it’s none of her business, but shouldn’t his family know? He says they might not approve, and asks her to forget what she thinks she heard.

Nell thinks that Carly and Michael deserve to know if Sonny is leaving. Sonny tells her that all his life he just wanted to be a good father, but he’s caused too much pain. She says she’s seen how much his family loves him. He asks her to let him grieve in his own way. Nell says that it’s not her place, and he might decide to stay. After he leaves though, she’s going to tell them. Sonny says it won’t matter. She goes upstairs to finish her errand. Sonny signs a note and leaves it on the desk for Carly.

Jason thinks something else is going on with Sonny. Carly thinks it could be a manic episode, but Jason says he’s taking his meds. He’s in a bad way and hasn’t slept. Carly says she hasn’t either, and she can’t be the one to take care of Sonny when she’s barely holding it together herself. She says Sonny planted a bomb and the bomb killed Morgan. End of story.

An officer tells Curtis that the commissioner wants a word and he has to come to the station.

Lulu tells Dante that maybe it’s time to let it go and close the door for good. She says she thought about Olivia’s premonition, and that maybe she had a daughter out there. Dante says if there was, he’d move heaven and earth to find her. Lulu says she’s learned by losing Morgan and watching Dante grieve, that they’re blessed to have Rocco, and she’s grateful for the family they have.

Nathan makes Nina promise that if Valentin calls her, to tell him right away. She says Valentin knows that he has no chance of another shot with her.

Valentin takes out a locked box.

Griff gets his mouth swabbed. Anna runs into the hospital. She tells Griff that she paid Valentin a visit. She says he never once mentioned Claudette or Charlotte, but that she’s certain he’s hiding something dangerous.

Tomorrow, Nell finds something in Morgan’s room, Griff decides to leave the priesthood, and Jordan tells Curtis that he’s in trouble.

General Hospital – Friday

Sam and Jason wait in a parking lot for Pete to show up. Jason says everything points to Sonny, but something doesn’t add up, and it’s probably staring them right in the face.

Ava talks to Kiki. Kiki isn’t sure if she’d be welcome at Morgan’s funeral. The one thing Carly asked her to do was not lead Morgan on if she had feelings for Dillon, but she did it anyway.

Nell brings the acceptance letter to Carly’s office. She also found what she thinks might be his journal.

Curtis asks Jordan what she wanted to see him about. She says he broke the law by taking the picture of the police file, and now has to face the consequences.

Anna tells Griff that child services is following up, but she knows the case worker, so they can postpone things. Griff says he should have the results by then. Anna thinks Valentin is planning something, but doesn’t know what.

Valentin visits Alexis, who has decided to take him up on the job offer.

Jordan tells Curtis that it’s too bad Valerie had to learn the hard way about him. He tells her that the file falling was an accident, and he took a picture by instinct. He asks her to leave Valerie out of it, but she says Valerie’s career is probably over, and at the least, she’ll face charges.

Kiki asks Ava to put the feud with Carly to rest for the day. Ava says Carly is being inappropriate to blame Kiki for Morgan’s state of mind. She says whenever Carly sees Kiki from now on, it will be a reminder, and how long should she endure it? She tells Kiki this is no life for her. Kiki says no one is looking for a server who spontaneously bursts into tears. Carly might not like her, but she gets it. Ava thinks she should go back to school or go abroad for a semester. Kiki asks if Ava is trying to get rid of her. Kiki says she can handle seeing Carly, but Ava says she’s not the only one who worries her. Morgan does too.

Carly looks at the book and says Morgan wasn’t the journaling type, since he always said what was on his mind. Nell says it looked like he was trying to hide it. Carly asks if she read it, but Nell says only the first page. Carly opens it and says he started keeping it when he was in Freedman.

Anna tells Griff that they shouldn’t assume Valentin is just there for one reason; the Cassadines are multi-taskers. She says it was like being worked over by a professional interrogator who was keeping her off guard. She’s going to use her resources to delve into his background. Griff tells her that he’s calling the bishop. He’s going to leave the priesthood for good.

Alexis tells Valentin not call her Natasha or sis; they only have a professional relationship. He says he stands by his promise to leave if he’s not the heir. Alexis says she has questions for him, and it shouldn’t take her long to determine when he’s leaving Port Charles.

Ugh! Breaking news. Blah-blah-blah-blah-blah-blah.

Jason tells Sam he’s been going over everything. He says the only thing that comes out as weird is Pete leaving the keys in the car and giving someone the opportunity to plant a bomb. I’d say that’s quite a lot. Sam suggests someone might have paid him. Jason sees that Pete just showed up for his shift and suggests they ask him.

Anna asks Griff if he’s sure. He says he’s been called to another life, and having only one person call him father might be easier. Ha-ha! A surgeon priest with a sense of humor. He believes God sends signs telling us His will, and Charlotte is the biggest sign he’s ever experienced. His path is more clear than it’s ever been.

Valentin and Alexis trade barbs. She asks about Nicholas signing over the title, and asks if there’s no quid pro quo. Valentin tells her that Nicholas was on the run and wanted to unload his assets, but she says it doesn’t make any sense. And Judge Judy says when something doesn’t make sense, it’s not true. Alexis didn’t mention that, but it is what Judy says. Alexis tells Valentin she could even accept it if his was the only recollection, but there’s Ava.

Ava tells Kiki she couldn’t have known what was going to happen, and Kiki says that’s what Sonny said. She says even if she didn’t know how much he was suffering, she should have been there for Morgan. She made things worse. Ava insists she’s not responsible and Kiki says, then who was? Ava flashes back to messing with Morgan’s meds. She says she knows exactly who’s responsible.

Carly asks Nell to stay. She reads from the journal. Morgan writes that Andre had asked him to keep it, and maybe it will be good for him. He’s done a lot of crazy things, but he’s starting to feel better, and wants to get out and try life again. He wants to be with Kiki and the people he loves. He writes that he’s bi-polar, and looking at the words, he has to accept it, but that doesn’t mean life is over. He says he wants his mother to be proud of him.

Jordan tells Curtis that she won’t take action against Valerie. She doesn’t want TJ’s uncle behind bars with his father either. She says he’s cleaned up his act with the drugs, but he’s still a user who only cares about himself.

Oh for the love of all that’s holy. Breaking news again. That can’t wait a whole half hour. Thanks, ABC.

Ava tells Kiki that Morgan was rational enough to pull over and was getting out of the car when he died. It’s Sonny’s fault, and Kiki should talk to Carly if she doesn’t believe Ava.

Carly says Morgan made an entry every day and next to it is a record of him taking his meds like he promised. He writes about getting out of Freedman and how he knows he can do this after Sonny talked to him. He goes on about finding Kiki with Dillon, but that they’re getting back together. Carly says everything sounds normal and happy. Until it’s not. He talks about the guy harrassing Kiki and how he backed off. Nell says the reaction sounds normal. Carly says he was in control of his illness. Until he wasn’t.

Here comes Pete. Sam gets out of the car. She tells him she’s Julian’s daughter. She says she thinks they can help each other out. She says the conversation can stay between the two of them. She wants his version of what happened the night Morgan was killed and offers him some cash.

Carly reads an entry about the baseball cap order. He says it wasn’t his fault, but he feels like a screw up. Everything feels off. He feels like he’s in a hole and doesn’t know why. He talks about discussing going back to school with Nell. Nell tells Carly she’s sorry. The writing changes; it’s as though he’s in a hurry. Carly says he was headed for a manic episode.

Ava tells Kiki that Morgan was going into a manic spiral and the events were inevitable, but if Sonny hadn’t planted the bomb, Morgan would be alive. Kiki asks who she’s trying to absolve, Kiki or herself?

Anna, Griff and Charlotte play cards. Griff suggess pizza, but Anna thinks they should go out. She says they have a trained agent with them. Her.

Valentin tells Alexis she’s a true credit to the Cassadines. She says no one ever said they were stupid. He says he should go, and she tells him not to stop until he gets to Greece. He remembers another document that he found in Greece, and gives it to her. She says it’s in Greek and he tells her have it translated. I’m shocked that neither one of them took the opportunity to say, “It’s all Greek to me.” Valentin says he’ll be in touch, and she tells him that she’s counting the minutes, closing the door in his face.

Sam tells Pete to think of it as severance pay. Pete says he has nothing to say, and Sam says maybe he should talk to Jason then. Pete asks if she’s threatening him, and she says no, that’s her husband’s job. Jason comes out and she leaves. Pete reconsiders, saying that they don’t even have to pay him. Jason asks what happened the night Julian’s car blew up.

Curtis says it was a mistake, but Jordan says it’s how he lives his life. He isn’t worthy of the badge, he has no morals or ethics. She says he’ll never work for the PCPD or any other jurisdiction close by. He says he’s not leaving Port Charles. She says fine, work for a lowlife, and tells Curtis that he’s finally found his calling. He calls her a hypocritical bitch.

Anna, Griff and Charlotte go to The Floating Rib. The test results are in, and Anna leaves to get the envelope. Griff makes fun of the high end menu with Charlotte. Valentin walks in and sits near them. Griff looks freaked.

Ava tells Kiki that she knows for a fact that Sonny is responsible. She hates seeing Kiki feel guilty. Kiki says she does feel guilty, but she’s not leaving Port Charles (today’s theme). She says she’s going to face what’s next, just like everyone else involved.

Carly tells Nell that Morgan’s handwriting gets worse and worse, until the entries are just short blurbs. Can’t think. Busted. Expelled. No one understands how I feel. Why can’t I do anything right? Tears slide down Carly’s face and she shakes her head.

Anna comes back to the table. Griff excuses himself, which surprises her. She opens the envelope. Griff goes to Valentin’s table and warns him to stay away from his daughter. Valentin says there’s a misunderstanding – Charlotte is his daughter. Thought so!

Curtis says Jordan acts high and mighty because she sacrificed so much to get where she is. He reminds her of every mistake she’s made, and says that she likes putting him down because of her cheating on Tommy. He tells her that if he’s in the gutter, she’s with him.

Jason asks Pete why he left Julian’s car with the keys in it and walked away. All of a sudden, Pete falls to the ground. Jason ducks next to a car.

Carly sees check marks for every day, even the last entry. Nell says Morgan never stopped taking his meds, and Carly says that she thought it was the only way he could spiral. Nell wonders if he faked it in case someone looked at the journal. Carly says he kept his vow and didn’t understand why it wasn’t working. Nell wonders if the medication needed adjusting. Carly doesn’t get how it cold go so badly, so quickly, unless there was something wrong with the medication.

Kiki has to get back to work and says she’s sincere in thanking Ava for stopping by. Ava gets a text from “Blocked.” I saw you. I know what you did to Morgan. Hmm… Nell perhaps?

On Monday, Carly tells Sonny she found something, Elizabeth asks Franco for a favor, and Charlotte sees Valentin.

Z Nation

A group of dudes drive an RV into a cluster of zombies.

Doc screws around with the engine of the ice cream truck. Kaya comes on the radio, playing a song for Operation Bite Mark. Addie says they need to find a transmitter to get in touch with Citizen Z and Kaya. Doc wants to get in touch with Kaya and tell her to play some Hendrix.

They hear a siren and a limo drives up. It’s Sketchy and Skeezy from many episodes ago. Doc says he thought they were dead, and asks what kind of luck that is. Addie says dumb luck.

Doc and Addie get in the limo and have a cocktail, while two motorcyclists work on the truck. Skeezy explains that they claimed the limo from the Bill Clinton museum and they should see what was found in the cushions. Sketchy says they heard about Murphy, and asks if they’re joining him. Doc tells him that he and Addie were checking out another group, and Sketchy says they’re all going the same way. He says friends don’t let friends drink and drive, and suggests they ride with him, calling it a presidential motorcade. Addie wonders what these two goons are up to now.

The limo follows Skeezy driving the truck, with the two motorcyclists ahead of him. Sketchy has Doc and Addie put on shades and they pull up to a building that used to be a large store. Skeezy announces the President of the United States, Sketchy, whose real name is Thurston Howell. There’s no one there for the rally though.

Sketchy says they’re just afraid, and changes the music. The motorcyclists turn into stripper cheerleaders. People start to come out from the recesses of the building. One introduces herself as the Mayor. Sketchy thanks her for her service and introduces Skeezy as Jefferson, his spiritual adviser. He sets up a podium and makes a state of the union address.

He says they’ve seen better days. He tells them that he knows they’ve heard the government has run off, but together they can get America working again and control the socialist zombie menace. A zombie comes out of nowhere and grabs him, but gets taken down. Sketchy says he’s willing to lay down his life because lost causes are worth dying for. Everyone applauds and the Mayor calls him Mr. President. Doc suggests it’s Mr. Smith Goes to the Apocalypse.

The Mayor says when their well dried up, most of the people left. They’re what’s left of South Dakota. Addie hasn’t been able to find a radio. She tells Doc that Sketchy is going to rip these people off. A woman named Erin runs up to Sketchy saying her husband is sick. He takes a picture with her, gives her a pin, and tells her good luck.

Doc talks to Erin. He says he’ll do what he can.

The Mayor asks how do they know he’s really the President? She asks who voted for him. Skeezy pulls out a scroll. Sketchy says he was billionth in line for the presidency, and everyone ahead of him is dead. He shows her his POTUS underwear.

Erin leads Doc to the quarantine section. She tells him people started getting sick about a week ago. She takes Doc to her husband. Doc looks at the man’s eyes, which are weird and yellow. The Mayor says they all have it; it’s first sign that something is wrong. Doc asks if they’ve been bitten, and she says not to her knowledge. He says the only thing they can do is let it run it’s course. He has no clue what it means.

Addie asks how it went, but Doc says there’s nothing he can do. Sketchy is making a speech about he store being an American enterprise. He says their fear turns them into monsters. He doesn’t want them to be afaid, but needs their help. He wants to build a wall to keep the zombies out and make the zombies build it.

Sketchy shows a map with an illustration of where he’ll build the wall. He says let’s make America America again. He explains that they’ll need funding. Whatever they can give in trade – guns, ammo, drugs – no donation is too small or large. Erin starts to go forward. Addie tries to stop her, but she says someone is finally giving them hope. She gives Sketchy her wedding ring.

Sketchy says it’s like his mother used to tell him – and gets beaned with a shoe. A guy with a bad toupee comes out of the crowd and says he’s John J. Lannister, the next president. Skeezy tells Sketchy that he saw the zombies take Lannister down, and no one could have gotten away from that.

Outside, Doc tells Addie this reminds him of Black Summer, and how entire cities were wiped out in days. He wonders what’s making the people sick. Addie asks if it’s worth the risk of them getting sick and he tells her, why save the world if there’s no one to enjoy it?

The dudes in the RV take stock of their supplies, including a cattle prod.

Lannister chews out Sketchy for stealing everything from him, including his pom-pom girls. They start slapping each other and girl fighting. Skeezy holds Lannister down and Sketchy thanks everyone, saying they have to leave to build the wall. He says four score and seven years from now, they’ll see the wall.

Lannister comes out and says the people deserve a vote. He announces his candidacy and Sketchy says it’s not an election year. Lannister presents his own plan – a series of very large holes. He wants to use criminals as bait. The zombies fall in the holes and eat the criminals. Lannister insists on a debate. Sketchy agrees. Lannister says they need a neutral moderator and calls out Addie.

Addie asks if it isn’t true thatthey’re both shameless con artists. Sketchy says he didn’t have con artist relations with this man. Lannister says zombies can’t be trained. Sketchy calls Lannister a flip flopper. They use all of the classic debate lines.

Doc tends to the sick and a man runs by yelling for help. He runs into the debate room, telling them that everyone in the neighboring town of Rosebud is dead and turned zombie. The Mayor says that’s their water supply. The man keels over. Doc tries to revive him. Erin tells Sketchy to do something. She’s not looking too good either. Sketchy says he’s going to kill the zombies first. Everyone applauds.

The zombie town of Rosebud is arriving. Lannister grabs a sword and Sketchy has a gun. Sketchy tells Skeevy that if he doesn’t come back, to kill Lannister. They go outside, following a zombie into another building. Sketchy tries to shoot the zombie, but the gun doesn’t work. Addie has followed and kills the zombie, as Sketchy and Lannister watch from behind a pillar. As she’s beating the crap out of the zombie, they run out the door.

Doc has no luck in reviving the man. The Mayor says he’s gone and Doc can stop now. The man immediately turns, and Doc gives him mercy.

Sketchy and Lannister come back. Sketchy brags that he killed the zombie and Lannister says he’s lying.

Doc starts to notice everyone’s eyeballs getting yellow.

The dudes in the RV say that no matter how much they beg, no mercy. Who are these guys?

Doc hot wires a mototcyle.

Sketchy and Lannister are back at their debate. Addie asks what Sketchy has done for the country, and says America has gone to the zombies. Silence. Sketchy asks when was the last time they paid taxes and says they’re welcome. A vote is taken.

Doc rides to Rosebud. He goes into the first house he sees. Not much there. He goes into the backyard and finds a shed with a makeshift skull and crossbones sign on it. He walks in. There are bodies everywhere. The people have committed suicide.

Doc checks out the water pump, but the water is brown. He looks at some pipes rigged up by the pool and follows them. He reaches into a water tank and pulls out a zombie head. Yuk! He goes back to the shed and examines the bodies more closely. They have yellow eyeballs.

Sketchy and Lannister continue to debate. I thought we were voting. Addie is snoozing off. Doc runs in and knocks the cup out of Lannister’s hand. He tells them that the water is contaminated and that there was a zombie head stuck in the filter. The Mayor says it’s their only water source, and they’ll die. Doc says they’re already dying and sees that everyone’s eyeballs are turning yellow. The Mayor says not everyone is sick, and Doc tells her that this zombie stuff is unpredictable.

Lannister says Sketchy is using his tactics to manipulate, a prime example of government overreach. Doc tells him that he’s insane and he’s trying to help these people live. The Mayor asks Sketchy what he thinks. Sketchy says there’s not enough proof and the matter needs more study. Doc says if they want to die, drink the water.

Addie tells Sketchy that this is real. People are in danger, so drop the act and help them.

Doc grinds something in a cup. The Mayor tells him it’s over anyway, but he says there’s always hope. He gives her some ground charcoal, saying it will bind the poison. She’s like, really? and he says he saw it on Naked and Afraid, and hopes it works.

Addie packs up. Sketchy tells her he wants to be a good person, but before she can answer, the RV dudes come running in. They tell everyone that these guys are con artists.

The zombie horde of Rosebud shuffles toward the town.

Doc sees the Mayor’s eyes clear up. She says she feels better, and he was right about the water.

The RV leader calls them treasonous charlatans, and asks what they have to say for themselves. Sketchy makes a snarky remark. Everyone grabs guns and there’s shooting back and forth . A cheerleader whacks the RV leader in the head. Doc tells Addie that it’s politics as usual. The zombies enter. The Mayor yells at them to quit shooting at each other.

The cheerleaders are taken down immediately. Doc grabs Addie, and she says time to go. He asks about the others, but sees that it will be okay when he and the Mayor exchange glances. Doc and Addie run out and get in a car where miraculously, the keys are in the visor.

Skeezy says he can’t live without his cheerleader love until he sees she’s a zombie, and then says let’s go. He and Sketchy run out, but the car is already moving. Doc accidentally knocks down some tanks of oil. Sketchy, Sleezy and Lannister (sounds like a law firm) slide around in it, smacking at each other. Addie asks if Doc wants to go back for them, but he says he hates politics.

Addie says she just wants to find Lucy and get the apocalypse over with. They pass the South Dakota sign.

The Mayor gives charcoal to the others, and they get better almost instantly. Erin and her husband are leaving, but want to know who won the election. The Mayor says that everyone wrote the same thing – that weed doctor.

We see a giant US flag hanging from the ceiling. The stars are in a “Z.”

Next time, Murphy wants 10K to spy on Roberta, Roberta thinks they need an army, and a renegade hand causes trouble. I mean a real hand. Like a hand detached from a body.

Quotes of the Week

I wrote “loan” because it was not a loan. – Plaintiff on Judge Judy.

My dear boy, have you ever tried acting? – Laurence Olivier to Dustin Hoffman when he stayed up for four days in a row in preparation to play his sleep-deprived character in Marathon Man.

After all human beings are like that. When they are alone they want to be with others and when they are with others they want to be alone. – Gertrude Stein, Paris France, 1940

Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less. – Marie Curie

🔊  Recommended: Channel Zero: Candle Cove on the SyFy network. An odd and creepy series about a TV channel that’s come back to haunt the adults who once watched it as children. Candle Cove had been a TV show that wasn’t listed in the TV Guide, starring some weird, badly made puppets. When the kids watched the show, real life murders happened. And it’s happening again.

Nov3

November 2, 2016 – GH Reopens, Little LA Goes Land Sailing & a Little on Little Dallas

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Franco tells Elizabeth he’s thrilled that GH is reopening. Elizabeth tells him to thank his mother again. Time to get back to work.

Monica makes a speech next to Steve Hardy’s portrait. She wants everyone to reflect on what’s happened and celebrate the hospital’s victory. She thanks everyone for their patience and stubborn determination. She wants to point out someone without whose help they couldn’t have done it – Tracy. Franco is just a tad disappointed.

Curtis is sitting at the bar. Valerie comes in and asks him what he’s doing there.

Jason calls to check on Sonny. He’s made it through another night. Sam wakes up and asks if the baby is going to be okay.

Griff says Charlotte is getting along great with Emma, and it’s distracting her from asking where her mom is. Anna says Emma has always wanted a younger sibling. She thinks it’s safer for them to stay with her until they find out what kind of threat Valentin poses.

Alexis comes downstairs wondering what happened. Pillows and bottles and glasses are everywhere. She sees the liquor box and says that happened. She adds that Valentin also happened, like she needed another reason to drink. She starts cleaning up and the doorbell rings. She thinks it’s the cleaning lady, but it’s Valentin.

Curtis says he’s there to see Valerie because she always comes there after spin class for her green drink. She asks what he’s working on, and he tells her cheating spouse stuff. She agrees they both have job things they can’t share. She’s glad he’s not working for Julian anymore though.

Jason tells Sam that she and the baby are fine. He calls what happened something I don’t catch, but it’s nothing serious. He says she’s not allowed to do anything strenuous, but everything else is back to normal. She says what’s normal for other people isn’t normal for them, and he says they’re working on the new normal.

Franco is like, what? Tracy says they’ve gotten a victory, but still have to win the battle to stay open and solid. There are still board members who want to sell, and they have to convince them otherwise by doing their best work. Elizabeth tells Franco that he’s the real person responsible. Hayden overhears and says she has it backward. Franco’s nutjob mother is the reason GH closed in the first place. Elizabeth says Franco had nothing to do with the crimes, and he works here, unlike Hayden. Hayden tells her she’s the hospitals new financial manager.

Dante comes by Anna’s place and tells them that the house is being guarded. Griff thanks them for everything and goes to work. Anna tells Dante that she’s sorry about Morgan. He says if they’d nailed Julian for killing Duke, Morgan would be alive. He feels like a failure as a cop and a brother. Anna says it’s not his fault that so much went wrong with the case, and if he needs anything to let her know. She asks him to tell her everything he knows about Valentin.

Valentin apologizes to Alexis for his unannounced visit. She threatens to call the police. He says whether she likes it or not, they’re family, and he wants to offer her a job.

Griff and Finn welcome each other back. Griff says Finn looks a lot better. Tracy says Dr. Finn made her aware of his issues, and it’s a private matter that won’t affect the patients. Griff moves on, and Finn tells Tracy not to stick her neck out for him. When his drug supply runs out, he’ll be sick again. She says by then he’ll find a cure. He asks about her unusual optimism. She says it’s funny how that happens when you have something to live for, and then looks at Hayden.

Hayden tells Elizabeth that she learned a lot from her father. No surprise, Elizabeth makes a snide comment. Hayden says the hospital was hemmoraging money, and she needs to figure out how to keep it open. She says she hopes they don’t have to cut the nursing staff. Touche.

Curtis tells Valerie she still looks incredibly sexy after a workout. She says more like sweaty, and usually gets her shakes to go. He takes a selfie with her and she threatens him with his life if he puts it on social media. He goes to get himself a coffee and Valerie her green stuff. Valerie deletes the picture, and the next one is a shot from Morgan’s case file. Seriously though, how dare she mess with his phone?

Sam tells Jason she thought they were waiting to move, but Jason says he’s close to an answer that will wrap things up. Sam asks about Alexis and he tells her that he’s left messages, but she hasn’t gotten back to him. Sam thinks that’s odd.

Valentin wants to hire Alexis as a consultant. Even if Nicholas is alive, he’s the legitimate owner of the Cassadine assets. Alexis says Valentin killed Nicholas and she isn’t amused by his charm. I am.  She says she’s a Cassadine, remember? He tells her they’re more alike than she cares to admit, and he knows she committed multiple ethics violations. He says they’re both the bastard children of Mikkos. Helena could put Medea to shame, and they never got what was rightfully theirs. Helena even tracked down Alexis’s mother and murdered her. He calls Alexis “Natasha,” and tells her that they deserve to inherit everything. Now I want to call him “Boris,” and have a cartoon in my head of them dressed up and holding one of those round, black bombs.

Finn acts ignorant, and Tracy asks if denial is his best defense. She says she sees the looks between them, although she doesn’t know what he sees in Hayden. He says there’s nothing between them and never will be. Tracy apologizes for suggesting differently. Finn thinks it’s ironic that Tracy hired Hayden for GH and not ELQ. Tracy says she thought he’d want her to be close by, but maybe her radar was off.

Valerie asks Curtis for an explanation. She says he’s been lying to her and never stopped working for Julian.

Obrecht asks Franco why he’s not working, and he says no patients yet. He wonders why she’s so chipper, and says he thought schadenfreude was her favorite emotion. She says she almost has a sense of…what’s the word? He says, empathy? but she’s like, hell no. He says he single-handedly saved the hospital, but he’s pretty much the pariah of upstate New York. He wants to know how he can get past that, and Obrecht tells him the biggest obstacle in his relationship with Elizabeth is himself.

Elizabeth tells Griff that she and Robin are good friends, and asks about him staying with Anna. He says they’re going above and beyond for him, but say he’s family. Elizabeth talks about how he contributed when her house blew up and he didn’t even know her.

Anna brings out coffee and tells Dante about being the WSB agent on the case. She says if he has info on Valentin, she’d appreciate hearing it. Dante tells her that Valentin is the bastard son of Mikkos, and explains what happened on the island. Anna says if he did kidnap Claudette, she doesn’t have a clue where he’d take her. Dante says he does recall one thing.

Alexis tells Valentin no thanks. She has no stake or interest in the estate. Their father was an unrepentant misogynist and women inherited nothing. Valentin says all she has to do is prove his share is legal. She says what if research shows Spencer owns it? He says if she makes a good faith effort and he’s not the heir, he’ll leave and never bother them again. I hope after paying her.

Sam and Jason enter. Jason immediately gets in Valentin’s face.

Finn congratulates Hayden on her new job. She can’t believe Tracy pushed the board to hire her. She says because Tracy thinks Finn walks on water, she got the job. Finn says it was her own talent that got her hired, and it’s good to have her on board. She says she owes him an aplogy.

Curtis says he never meant to deceive Valerie. He meant what he said. Valerie says he took advantage of her to access a file. He reminds her that she left it on the desk. She asks if he saw dollar signs or wanted to impress Julian? He says it was an accident; it fell and opened up, and he thought there was no harm in snapping a few pictures. She says it was rookie mistake, but he didn’t have the decency to look away. She could have lost her job if Jordan walked in. She says he’s everything Jordan warned her about.

Valentin tells Jason that he’s family. Alexis says it’s not worth it. Valentin tells Alexis to think about the offer. He gives her his card. Before he leaves, he says he’s sorry about the wine delivery. He didn’t know she wasn’t drinking anymore. OMG – he is so smooth! You just know she has to be at least a little grateful for that save.

Anna tells Dante that Valentin must have enough money for bribes or has the ear of enough powerful people to make things happen. She hasn’t gotten anywhere with questioning anyone.

Griff apologizes to Elizabeth for the weirdness with Franco. She says Franco is just being Franco and is a little territorial.

Obrecht tells Franco he’s concealing his true self and bottling his emotions. Franco says he really likes Elizabeth. Obrecht asks him how long before the ticking time bomb in his head explodes. It’s that one Boris is holding.

Franco says he’s trying to be a better person for Elizabeth. Obrecht says they’re all heros in their own story. Franco says he doens’t need to be a villain in everyone else’s. She tells him that there’s no becoming better, and he needs to find someone who loves him for him. Franco claims he won’t be jealous anymore. Obrecht tells him that Elizabeth is talking to Griff right now, and makes a remark about his strudel. Franco jets over to Elizabeth, putting his arm around her and saying hi.

Curtis tells Valerie that Jordan’s opinion is tainted, and he’s not the same man. She says what he just did proves otherwise and she has thinking to do. He asks her, about us? and she says there is no “us” anymore. They’re done. She has to think if she should turn him in for stealing evidence.

Alexis asks Jason if Sam and the baby are okay. He says it’s an easy to treat minor condition. Jason says he called, and Alexis tells him that her phone died. Jason leaves to check on Carly. He says if Valentin comes back, to call him. Sam asks what Valentin offered her.

Finn says Hayden doesn’t owe him an apology. Hayden says she said some harsh things, especially about his wife. She was out of line to tell him he should move on. She doesn’t know that kind of love, and had no business telling him to get over it when it’s convenient for her. Finn says if she needs a lunch buddy, he’s here. She says he misunderstood. She doesn’t want to be buddies.

Elizabeth tells Franco that they were talking about Griff’s daughter. Franco says he has a bit of a jealous streak, and it reared it’s head, but asks for a second chance. He says that he and Griff will be working together, and keeps shoving candy in his mouth as he’s talking. He steers Griff off down the hall so they can get acquainted.

Obrecht is watching all of this, and Monica tells her that an ambulance is coming in, so she might want to get to the ER. Obrecht says she thought she was banished to the records department. Monica says it’s a new era, and if she follows the rules and keeps her nose clean, things will change. Obrecht practically skips out.

Hayden tells Finn that she’s not doing that to herself. He understands and she suggests they keep it professional. They shake hands. Oh come on. Not even in the friend zone?

Tracy asks if Finn is still trying to make her believe that he doesn’t have feelings for Hayden.

On the phone, Curtis says the cops are breathing down his neck and he has to talk to someone asap. Jason comes in and says talk to him.

Sam takes the card, but Alexis wants it back. She says if she can prove that Valentin can’t lay claim to the estate, he’ll leave. Sam doesn’t believe it.

Anna approaches Valentin’s hotel room door. He comes up behind her and says he’s been expecting her.

Tomorrow, Curtis connects Sonny to the bomb, Nathan says someone has been asking questions about Charlotte, and Anna asks Valentin if they’ve met before.

Little Women: LA

Elena and Preston check out a toy train place. Elena says it seems like lately no one is having any fun. In her interview, she talks about the disaster that was the survival retreat. We flash back to the highlights of Terra and Briana still not getting along with Christy. Elena says she’s friends with all of them and wants to invite them to celebrations, but she’s worried that they’ll make everything a downer. She wants to bring them together with something that will bring back the old days and remind them of why they became friends in the first place. Preston suggests she take it outside of LA.

Todd and Christy go out to lunch. Autumn’s health issues are leveling off, but Todd is still worried about Christy’s dad. Christy says the stress has been exhausting. Todd asks if the survival retreat was about the conditions or the people, and Chisty says both. Christy thinks Terra faked apology, and for some reason, is under the misconception that Briana accepted hers.

Terra, Tonya, Elena and Briana take a self-defense class. In her interview, Tonya is concerned about Briana wanting a gun. She says she wants to prove even if you’re 3‘8“, you can be a powerhouse. The girls do pretty well, but are also laughing through the whole thing. Terra says she feels like a warrior.

Afterward they talk about the survival retreat. Terra just wants everything with Christy behind her. She doesn’t want the rest of them to have to pick between friends, and wants them to be able to share the same environment without fighting. Elena hopes she can stick to her word, and asks everyone to remember how they used to have fun. She’s bringing the girls out to the desert to do land sailing. Briana says she’ll be cordial, even though Christy’s apology was bogus. Elena is like, what is it that you want? and thinks Briana is playing hardball, but they’ll be friends again one day.

One of Tonya’s eyes is weaker than the other. She’s eventually having surgery to strengthen it, but in the meantime is getting Lasik surgery. She’s terrified and I don’t blame her. It looks scary. It’s over quickly though. Preston says this beat the dog psychic that Angelique brought in a few weeks ago. We flash back to Tonya and Preston grilling her about dating. Tonya says that Angelique’s new boyfriend is her old boyfriend, Reggie, who Preston hasn’t met. He’d previously broken it off because he didn’t have a job, and she’s concerned he doesn’t want to meet Preston because he still doesn’t have it together.

Matt and Briana discuss Maverick at lunch. He has acid reflux and the doctor has said all they can do is give him drops for gas. Briana tells Matt about the self-defense class and explains the moves they learned. She says it made her think about Christy, and Matt asks if she’s coming to Thanksgiving. Ha-ha! Briana says Elena thinks Terra has a reason not to forgive, but Briana doesn’t and is just following in Terra’s footsteps. Matt says they’re in the same boat. Briana says she knows what Terra feels. Christy wants to be miserable and she doesn’t. Matt says if people are going to hang out as friends, it would be nice if there was a time with no drama. Briana tells him about the land sailing trip. He tells her to please come home in one piece.

Terra is rehearsing for Dancing with the Stars. Tonya and Elena come to watch. Terra says Sasha keeps telling her to tuck her derriere, but it’s tough being a little person with her shape. They go through their dance and it looks great. Tonya tears up because she’s so proud of Terra’s accomplishments. She thinks Terra has a shot at winning. Terra says Sasha looks past her being a little person, but at the same time, acknowledges it, and she loves that.

Terra tells the girls that this is hard on her body. She also thinks the other people don’t look at her like competition. She feels like they’re dismissing her. She hates that, and doesn’t want Sasha to feel like they’re not real competitors. She says she didn’t feel like the underdog until she heard other people talking about everyone else except her. She says they all think she can’t do it. In her interview, she says you get this all the time as a little person. She wants to show the world they can do anything. Tonya says she can’t let the others bring her down. Elena says she’s sacrificed a lot to be on the show, and Terra says it’s hard never being home. In her interview, Elena says Terra has the weight of all the little people on her shoulders and doesn’t want her to focus on that. Terra asks them to come to the first show.

Angelique has agreed to bring Reggie home to meet her father. Tonya says if she thinks they’re going easy on her, he’s getting the same treatment she got when Kerwin moved in. Angelique and Reggie arrive. Kerwin asks if they’re having sex. Tonya says if they are, are they using protection, and moves immediately to what their future plans are. Not too overwhelming and awkward. Reggie says marriage is ultimately the goal. He says Kerwin called him “son,” but Kerwin explains that was because of the age difference, not indicating his place in the family. They joke around and things go well. Tonya makes a toast to the future.

Jasmine says the best thing about being a little person is that she can actually play on the playground while the other moms have to watch. It’s one of those indoor things where you can only weigh so much. She meets Briana, and tells her what the other girls said at the class. Jasmine says she was disappointed in Briana and Terra for not being able to put their differences aside; it was like high school. Briana says at least she tried, but in her interview, Jasmine says she should have just stayed home. She tells Briana that Christy isn’t taken seriously, and she’s heard her say she’s sorry multiple times. Briana says she gets it and she’s moving forward. She respects how Jasmine feels, but hopes she doesn’t get hurt.

Kerwin and Tonya do some mini-golfing. She says on days like this, she falls in love with him all over again. They are pretty funny together. He tells her she did good, and likes that they’re spending time together. She talks about rebuilding her relationship with the girls, and he asks what about them. He says he misses Texas, but he’s enjoying being together. Tonya says it’s not as abd as she thought it was going to be. She says part of her wanted it and part of her was scared, but now she’s good. He suggests getting a house together, one that’s theirs. Tonya is excited to do something more permanent.

The girls meet at the land sailing place. The instructor explains how the “land yacht” works. You steer with your feet. Jasmine is a little miffed because she’s pregnant and no one seems to care. Christy acts all smiley. In her interview, she says she’s there for Briana, thinking they made amends. In her interview, Terra says she doesn’t want a relationship with Christy, but doesn’t want the girls to feel weird. She tells the girls that she doesn’t want Motocross take two, and we flash back to her biking mishap. The instructor tells them there are no brakes, and to be careful because you can flip over easily. Jasmine opts out of the sailing.

The yachts are set up. In her interview, Terra says Sasha had advised her against this venture, and she tells everyone she loves them in case she doesn’t come back. It looks awesome, but they go really fast. Terra says she doesn’t know what she was worried about because it’s easy and fun. Tonya gets stuck, but no one volunteers to help. She says that in times like this, you can count on your friends to stand in the shade and yell advice while you struggle. She finally gets going again, and then gets stuck again. Elena is having a ball.

Terra wants to talk to Christy and make sure they’re standing on neutral ground. Terra approaches Christy and says they haven’t talked in forever. Christy just stares at her. In her interview, Terra says it’s dry like the desert, and she hadn’t expected such a lack of response.

Terra says neither one of them are innocent. Christy gives her a blank stank face. She tells Christy that everyone is tired of the drama. She doesn’t want to fight anymore and hopefully they can just…she doesn’t even know what to say. In her interview, Christy says she doesn’t know what to believe. Terra says nice chat, and goes back to the group. For someone who keeps claiming they want to set things right, I dunno about Christy.

Even though she couldn’t participate, Jasmine is glad they came. She says even though they’re not all friendly, at least they’re not fighting. Tonya asks how everyone felt about the retreat, but no one is very positive. Jasmine says she thinks Terra and Briana are being childish. She wanted them to mend fences and came out with nothing. Terra suggests she’s more concerned about their relationships than they are. Good point.

Tonya says it took time to get that way and it will take time to get back. Briana agrees that it wouldn’t be real to just say everything is fine again. Terra says she looks forward to more days like this. Elena says they’re blessed to have each other and suggests they watch the sunset.

In her interview, Elena says friendship like this is worth fighting for. As the sun sets, there’s a group hug and I love yous.

This was the finale. The only interesting blurb was that Christy still doesn’t have Briana’s new phone number. I didn’t think she would.

Next time, the reunion. Duck, just not as far, and run. Plastic will be joining them.

👢 I checked out Little Women: Dallas and it looks like it has possibilities. I had abandoned the Atlanta branch of the franchise – too much twerking and fighting – but Dallas looks like it’s kinder, gentler, and more interesting. So far. Emily and Bri, otherwise known as The Cheeks (Right and Left) have moved from Atlanta back to their home state. They did seem to be the most normal of the Atlanta bunch. Sadly, Emily lost her baby at three months, but is still with her squeeze, Wooda (shoulda, coulda). The clothes are cute, and I like the cowgirl spin on things. We’ll see how it goes and if I can stick it out.

Nov2

November 1, 2016 – Valentin Rocks PC, Eddie Rocks Things at the Hospital & Kyle Rocks Below Deck

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Nell is in Carly’s office. She pulls out a note from (what I assume is) her purse. Michael pops in, asking if she’s okay. She shoves the note back in the bag.

Anna and Robin ate all of the candy geared for Emma, and Anna thinks they should post her reaction on the internet. I vote yes. Robin says Port Charles is home, and Anna says she’s glad Robin is there. She wants to discuss some things face to face. The doorbell rings. It’s Griff with Charlotte. He says they need Anna’s help.

Julian meets Ava at the bar. He wonders if he’ll have to duck a swing from Carly. Ava tells him he has no idea what “he” did to them. Julian wonders what the blip she’s talking about.

At Alexis’s house, Sam asks her if what Valentin said is true. Jason joins them, and Sam tells him Valentin is in Port Charles.

Valentin comes to the Crimson office. He tells Nina he told her she’d see him again, and here he is. Love to hate Valentin.

Griff introduces Charlotte to Robin. Well, kind of. She’s sleeping on Griff’s shoulder. He deposits her upstairs. Robin asks if this is what Anna wanted to talk to her about and Anna says yes. Griff explains that Charlotte is his daughter; a daughter he just found out about two days ago. Griff tells Anna that Valentin is legally free and Dante confirmed it. Anna calls Dante to see what she can find out. Robin tells Griff that if Valentin is as dangerous as the rest of the family, he’s right to seek Anna’s help.

Ava tells Julian that Valentin is in town, and apparently the owner of Windemere. She doesn’t know how that happened, but she’s the only witness to Nicholas’s murder. Valentin is a cold-blooded killer and who is the next logical person on his list? Julian says she has nothing to worry about, and doesn’t she think if Valentin was going to kill her he would have done it before he showed up in Port Charles? He tells Ava he’ll protect her regardless.

Nina asks if Valentin isn’t supposed to be in prison. He says he’s been exonerated. He tells her that he shot Nicholas in self-defense and shot Doc by accident. He shows her the papers, and she asks what about the attempted kidnapping of Spencer, reminding him that she’s the one who turned him in. He says she’s too beautiful to hold a grudge against.

Sam explains to Jason what happened at Windemere, and how Valentin revealed himself. She says he checked into a hotel to give them a few days to adjust. Alexis says her half-brother is confident Port Charles will be his permanent address.

Nell tells Michael she’s just distracted and she’s finishing up some work for Carly who went home. Michael says he’s not there to talk to Carly; he came there to find her. He wants to thank her for looking after Avery and his dad. He also thanks her for what she told him on the bridge. She helped him see what his father is going through. He was so busy blaming him, he didn’t see that Sonny is a wreck too.

Jason doesn’t understand how Valentin ended up walking away. Alexis says there were lapses with the Greek police. Sam reminds him of how wound up Valentin was on Cassadine Island, and says that now he’s relaxed because he knows they can’t touch him. Sam suddenly doubles over.

Robin tells Griff about when she was held prisoner on Cassadine Island, but says she’s never heard of Valentin. Anna comes back. She says the good news is, Charlotte’s name hasn’t come up. Griff explains the connection between Charlotte and Valentin to Robin. Griff thinks it’s no coincidence that Valentin showed up when Claudette disappeared. Anna agrees.

Nina tells Valentin that he has a lot of nerve and asks what he wants. He assures her he’s sane, and apologizes for not being as forthcoming as he should have been when they met. He says even as he was being led off to prison, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. Nina says he must have heard Spencer was sent away and is pursuing him, but decided to stop by and see if she still buys his lines. She doesn’t. He says he has no interest in Spencer; he came back to see her.

Sam tells Jason something is wrong. Alexis says the ambulance is on its way. Jason carries Sam outside.

Ava tells Julian that she wonders if things would be different if she’d made different choices. If Nicholas had lived, she might have fallen in love with him and chosen differently about a lot of things. Julian says she seems scared, like she’s torturing herself about something in the past. She says it doesn’t matter; she can’t change it and they all have their secrets. She tells Julian that he should be worried about Sonny. Sonny almost strangled Scotty, and his hatred for Scotty is a drop in the bucket compared to his hatred for Julian. Julian says he’s not concerned.

Griff tells Robin that he has to take what Claudette said about Valentin to heart, even though she’s lied about everything else. He thinks the timing is too close to be a coincidence. Anna says she thinks Claudette believes the safest place for Charlotte is with him. Anna tells Robin that Claudette boarded a flight to Canada, but never entered the country, so is probably traveling under an assumed name. Griff wonders if Valentin thinks he can get what he wants by targeting Charlotte, and thinks that he might even have Claudette.

Valentin tells Nina that she’s very compelling. He tells her about his family, and says they weren’t exactly welcoming. She says she’s not into him at all, and doesn’t want to see him again. He tells her she’s a beautiful woman, but a terrible liar.

Jason and Alexis wait at the hospital. The doctor says there are no signs of distress to the baby or evidence of miscarriage. Alexis tells Jason to go in to see Sam and call to let her know what’s going on. She needs to get back to her wine. She doesn’t say that last part, but… Jason goes into Sam’s room and tells her that he’s sorry. She asks why.

Michael tells Nell that he needs to focus on his mom. Nell asks if that means he can’t be with Sonny too. He says Carly isn’t trying to keep him away from Sonny, but she can’t stand to be in the same room with him. He knows if Sonny had acted differently, Morgan would still be alive. (The theme for today: If things had gone differently.) Nell says she shouldn’t have given him any advice, since she has no concept of what they’re going through. Michael tells her that if she could find reasons to stop by the house, he’d appreciate it. Just showing up might make a difference. Nell says she likes Avery and his father, but doesn’t know how much good she can do. He asks to return the favor and says whatever it is, he can listen.

Griff checks on Charlotte. Anna says he’s been a father for a minute and he’s had to be all-consumed with keeping her safe. Robin wonders if he really understands what he’s dealing with.

Valentin tells Nina that he knows he’s not the only one who thinks about that night. She says that’s when he was sweet Theo. She wonders how she could be so wrong about him. She asks again what he wants. He comes there out of the blue, thinking something between them was important and meant something, when it was just a hook up. She says she’s moving on, and he says he can change her mind. She says she doesn’t want to see him, let alone sleep with him. She tells him that if he thinks he can get through this town being charming, he has a rude awakening coming.

Jason tells Sam everything is okay. He apologizes for losing his temper. Sam says with Valentin back in the picture, she feels like she’s dealing with Julian all over again. Jason says Valentin isn’t worth going after, and doesn’t care what he does, as long as it doesn’t affect them.

Alexis gets home and zeros in on the liquor delivery box. She calls Molly and leaves a message to call back. She messes around on her laptop. She leaves a message for Kristina to call her back.The box beckons. She wanders around, drinks water, goes through the mail. The box keeps calling. She finally opens it and pulls out a bottle. She pours some into one of the biggest wine glasses I’ve ever seen – although not as big as Amy Schumer’s – and takes a drink.

Julian tells Ava to trust him. She says ordinarily she’d laugh, but nothing about this is funny. He says Sonny isn’t going to make a move on him. Ava wonders if Jason has been filled in. She thinks he might be useful in dealing with Valentin. Julian asks if Alexis was there when Valentin showed up.

Alexis is in full party mode. Now she’s guzzling the wine and gets up to open another bottle.

Sam is going to be monitored through the night as a precaution. Jason says he’ll stay with her. He says all she has to do is sleep. She drifts off.

Griff brings Charlotte downstairs and asks if Anna minds if she stays on the couch, since he wants to keep an eye on her. He says until a few weeks ago, he didn’t know she existed; until a few days ago, he didn’t know he was a father; and now he just wants to protect her and give her what she needs.

Valentin asks if Nina is having a baby. She says the books on her desk are for article research. Valentin says children make for an interesting story, and looks forward to reading it

Anna says Valentin is a mercenary with powerful friends. Robin asks if Anna knows what the next step is. Anna says she knows what she has to do.

Nell tells Michael that she already feels close to the family. She sees the pain they’re in, and how huge it was to lose Morgan. Michael says it’s late and asks if she wants him to walk her out. Nell says she has work to finish up and he leaves. She takes the note back out. We don’t see the whole thing, but it’s signed, “your father.”

Ava is surprised that the bloom isn’t off the rose with Alexis, especially after everything that happened. Julian says he’s not ready to let their chance go yet. He’s concerned about Alexis, but Ava says Valentin has other fish to fry. Julian tells her that he has other concerns about Alexis.

Jason tries calling Alexis, but she doesn’t answer. He leaves a message and says he’ll be with Sam at the hospital. Alexis doesn’t answer because she’s passed out.

Griff prays, asking God to help him and strengthen Charlotte. He asks for help to be a good father and to protect her.

Anna talks to Robert on the phone about Valentin. She says this is the case she wants to work on, and wants to start officially asap.

Nina asks Valentin to leave; he’s boring her. He says he’s never boring. As he leaves, he tells her to look on page 302 if she’s interested. After he’s gone, she looks in the baby name book, seeing his name. It means strong, vigorous and healthy. It’s also associated with a fertility festival that connects it to Valentine’ Day and love. She holds the book to her chest.

Tomorrow, Obrecht gives Franco relationship advice, Tracy is optimistic, and Valentin visits Alexis.

If Loving You is Wrong

Eddie asks Pete how he’s doing. Pete can barely speak. Eddie might be ridiculous, but he’s also scarey. He smacks Pete, telling him to wake up. Eddie tells him that the hospital says he’s going to pull through. The question is, is that a good thing? Pete says it is. He tells Eddie he should leave (insert Family Feud wrong answer sound here), and Eddie says he’ll leave when he’s ready.

He says Pete has his tape. Pete pretends like he’s never even heard of the invention of video. He asks how Eddie got in and Eddie says even the FBI has to pee. He says he’ll leave when Pete answers him. He asks if he gave the captain the tape, but Pete says he can’t remember. Eddie tells him to keep acting like he doesn’t remember. Maybe it will be to his advantage, maybe not. He asks what Pete did with the copy; he knows Pete must have made one. He starts manhandling Pete, pressing on his wounds. Pete tries not to scream and Eddie says to tell him what he knows. Eddie is the worst.

Pete tells Eddie he doesn’t know. Eddie seems to accept this. Ew! His hand is all bloody. He tells Pete to get some rest. Now Pete is babbling. Eddie shoots something into one of Pete’s tubes. Ben stops the FBI guy in the hallway,and Eddie sneaks out behind him. Pete pulls the tube out. Outside the door, Ben acts like an idiot, praising the FBI guy and saying how great the organization is. Pete passes out. Why didn’t he try to press a button or something?

Andrew has found Alex’s wrecked car, but no Alex. He thinks she must have walked away. On the phone, Steven tells him to check the area and to be careful, since it’s out of his jurisdiction. Andrew asks if he should call the local sheriff. Steven says it’s already done and gets testy when Andrew asks if he should follow that up.

Andrew calls Lushion, who is still at the hospital with Natalie. Lushion tells him it’s not a good time, but Andrew says they found Alex’s car and it’s a wreck, but no Alex. He tells Lushion that Steven sent him out there and he doesn’t have a good feeling; he thinks he should go to internal affairs. Lushion keeps telling him it’s not a good time, but Andrew is starting to panic. Lushion tells Andrew that his son has been shot. He says if Andrew has a bad feeling to go back; he should trust his feelings. Andrew says he’s got this, and Lushion should go back to his family. If everything goes to the Eddie side, half the cast will be dead by the end of the episode.

Lushion calls Esperanza. He asks what’s going on, and what’s up with the kidnapping. She says she doesn’t have a lot of details and she hadn’t wanted to bother him. He wonders about Randal’s mother being guarded at the hospital. Esperanza explains that Randal’s mom said Brad did it. Lushion says that must be why Ben and Eddie are there. Esperanza tells Lushion that Ben is an idiot and Lushion should keep an eye on things. Lushion says he has his hands full, so Esperanza says she’ll call the captain. Lushion says he’ll take care of it and call a friend of his who’s an ex-cop. I just have to interject that Louise had said it was “the man next door,” which Esperanza pointed out last week. Consistency, people!

She tells Lushion there’s stuff going on at the station that doesn’t make any sense. They have to talk at some point, but not on the phone. Lushion tells her not to share anything she knows with Eddie. She realizes Lushion is confirming that Eddie is a dirty cop. Like he’s not obvious about it.

Ben is nodding out, sitting next to Louise. Eddie comes in and sees Eddie has been screwing with Louise’s morphine and taking some for himself. He tells Ben he’s going to another place, and asks if Ben is nuts, shooting up an IV drug in a hospital. Ben apologizes and Eddie tells him to stay out of his way. He looks at Louise and says, so this is the thing that gave the world Randal. He smacks her face. He wants to find out what she knows about Brad. Eddie says it’s sad, and Eddie makes fun of him, calling him a junkie. He says he’s tired of hearing his sappy ass. He tells Ben when Louise wakes up to get him. Ben says the captain told him to call Steven and he’ll get in trouble. Eddie tells him to understand the world he lives in and he’s trouble.

Ben says he wouldn’t need the medicine if Eddie hadn’t shot his hand off. Eddie asks what’s wrong with him. While they’re arguing, the nurse comes in and says she was looking for Ben. Ben says he had to use the bathroom, and she says it’s down the hall. She has Marcie with her and asks if she’s on the approved visitor list. Eddie says yes, and he’ll stay while she’s there.

Eddie tells Marcie he’s sorry about Randal. She says tell someone who cares. He says he didn’t want him see killed, and she asks if he’s dead. Eddie says that’s the status; they’re looking for a dead body. He says she must be glad, since they made her a laughing stock. She says it’s not a happy situation and he calls her a weak ass bitch. She slaps him and I laugh. Then Eddie laughs, and it’s slap, laugh, repeat a few times. He says something inside must make her happy that Randal got what’s coming to him.

He suggests she stick with Brad and that Brad really likes her. Then he switches gears and says that maybe they cooked this up together. He says this puts a new spin on things, and because he’s an officer of the law she has to answer all of his questions. She says she’s not afraid of him, and he can call her lawyer. She tells him to get out, and he says for now, but she’ll be seeing him and his invetstigation team soon enough. She says he’s disgusting, and he leaves.

Lousie seconds that. She tells Marcie that Alex’s parents are going to kill Randal. Marcie asks if Louise has called the police. Louise says she’s been pretending to be asleep. She says that Ben took her drugs and Eddie is talking about killing someone and slapped her three times. She tells Marcie that what’s happening is a federal offense and to call the FBI. Marcie doesn’t know how to do it. I guess she’s never heard of Google. Louise tells her to find her purse at the house and get her phone. She gives Marcie the password, telling her to look through the phonebook and call Gary Henderson, her cousin. He’ll kow what to do. She tells Marcie to help Randal. Marcie says she will, and she’ll be back.

Oh crap. Ben looks in. Louise pretends to be asleep again.

Eddie approaches Lushion. He says Lushion has a lot to worry about. Lushion says he’ll just worry about Eddie. Eddie leaves, telling Lushion to watch himself. Lushion sees Marcie and asks if she’s there to see Natalie. She says no, she’s there to see Louise. Marcie tells Lushion what Louise told her about Alex’s parents kidnapping Randal. She wants him to call the FBI. He says there are problems at the police station, but they don’t include him. He says Eddie is at the center, but he’s good guy and on her side. Marcie says she needs to get Louise’s purse and asks him to keep watch. He says it’s difficult right now and Marcie tells him about Ben stealing the morphine and how Louise is pretending to be asleep. Lushion says he’ll make sure she’s safe. They’re certainly making this call to the FBI more complicated than it needs to be.

Lushion sees Ben nodding in the chair. He asks what’s going on and if there were any visitors. At first Ben says no one, but then says Marcie. Lushion asks about officers and Ben says no. Lushion says he saw Eddie a while ago, and asks if he came by. Ben says he hasn’t seen him. Lushion says Ben seems smart, but then wants to play stupid. Ben says he didn’t see him, and Lushion smacks him. (Lots of smacking going on tonight.) Ben says okay, he stopped by. Lushion wonders how he forgot so quickly. He asks how long Ben has been on drugs. He pushes up Ben’s sleeve and sees the track marks.

He asks what Eddie was doing there, and smacks Ben again. Ben says he just wanted to know if Louise was awake. Lushion says and what else, and Ben tells him Eddie was looking for information about the kidnapping. Eddie wants a call when she wakes up. Lushion asks why he’s not calling the captain, and says the moment she opens her eyes, Ben is to call him too. He tells Ben to stop swaying before he smacks him again. Then he tells him to sit down and make sure no one goes in.

Lushion goes into Louise’s room. He says he spoke to Marcie and she doesn’t have to pretend. Louise stays asleep. He says okay, he’ll tell her about himself. He believes in upholding the law, and he’s here to help her and help find her son. He says Brad is at the station and they’re spending a lot of time that could be spent finding Randal. He says he knows it’s hard to trust, but if she can, he believes he can help find him. Still nothing. He says she doesn’t have to trust him, but don’t trust the idiot outside her door or any other officer.

She opens her eyes. He says if she feels comfortable, maybe she can tell him the last time she saw Randal and who was there. He says he’s not in a rush, but time is of the essence. He leaves his card and says call him any time. She can ask Marcie; he’s on the right side. He tells her to remember not to talk to any of the officers. He leaves and she looks at his card.

Ben asks Lushion what happened, and Lushion tells him to sit his ass down. Nobody in or out. Ben nods out again. Lushion calls Lamont. He says he needs another officer at St. Andrews for Louise. He says it’s getting crazy there.

Alex walks down a dark road. She sees a car and tries to flag it down. It’s a cop car. It’s Andrew. He tells her that he’s from Maxine, and she asks if he’s alone and if Eddie is with him. He says they have to go to the station and gets out of the car. She says her son is in danger and he’s at her parents’ house. When he asks how she knows, she says she just does. He tries to get her into the car and she tells him that she saw them take the baby. She refuses to get in the car unless he’s taking her there. He tells her that he has to call it in, to get in the front seat, and that she’s safe. Alex gets in and Andrew follows on the driver’s side.

Lushion yells at the FBI guy and tells him to find him, but I missed who. Did Pete disappear? Is he talking about Eddie? Dammit!

Marcie calls Kelly. She says Brad didn’t do it. Louise told her it was Alex’s parents. Kelly is like, thank God, but Marcie says they’re still out there. Marcie says she’s coming home and then says she doesn’t feel so good. Kelly says it’s just everything that’s going on. Marcie says Louise wants her to call the FBI. She drops to the ground and Kelly calls to her, but there’s no answer.

Rusty and company take Randal out of the box. They drag him through the woods and toward a building.

Next time, Esperanza tells Brad about Alex’s parents, Kelly tells Lushion that Marcie is in trouble, Alex calls Esperanza, and Travis threatens Kelly.

Below Deck

Captain Lee and Kate on Watch What Happens Live tonight – can’t wait!

Kate recalls how rude Nico and Lauren were the drunken night before. Ben and Emily giggle over their first date. Kyle is moody, saying that if Sierra comes to London, he’s leaving town. Kelley is pissed because he got called on the carpet.

Sierra talks to Emily about Kelley going off on her because he was jealous of Emily’s date with Ben. She’s also having to deal with Kyle, who’s feelings are hurt because she put him in the friend zone.

The captain talks to Kelley about the pizza on the floor, saying not that long ago, he had to reprimand them about a take-out sushi mess. He says if he has to address the issue one more time, they’ll be confined. Respecting the boat is a carved-in-stone rule.

Kate tells Ben about Kelley yelling at Sierra. She says he’s used to being the guy all the girls want and the best deckhand, and he’s on a spiral bender. Kelley joins them and asks if Kate wants to talk. She says too many things have happened in too short an amount of time. In his interveiw, Kelley says he’ll kiss Kate’s ass until they leave.

Ben tells Kelley he had already sent Emily flowers, and Kelley says he wouldn’t have gotten involved had he known that. Ben says sorry and it’s all cool.

Emily calls her family. She tells her dad about going on the date with Ben and he calls her a naughty girl and uses the pet name “rabbit.” They sound cute.

The captain calls Kate, Ben and Kelley to the crew mess. The primary is Rebecca, a psychic medium who contacts the dead. Kelley calls her a whacko immediately, and Kate thinks only stupid people aren’t open to the supernatural. They require a spiritual yoga session and a psychic dinner party. Other psychics will be with them and some dudes. Kate jokes around, explaining gluten to Ben.

Kelley has a powwow with Nico and Lauren about the pizza thing. He says he talked with the captain about disrespecting the boat, and they’re on their third strike. He tells them that they’ll have to be psychic themselves and be extra careful this charter. No doubt Lauren and Nico are rolling their eyes in their minds.

The crew puts on their happy faces for the guests’ arrival. Rebecca thinks there’s something familiar about the boat. OMG – it’s the guys from The People’s Couch – Scott, Emerson and Blake. When is that show back on anyway? Kate does the boat tour and Kelley discusses activities with the guests. AND THERE’S LUNCH. It’s some kind of curried lobster and I’m dying. I had vegetable soup for dinner. Everyone loves the food and Ben says they must be quasi-human.

The water toys are brought out. While the guests are doing something else, the pool starts to float away. Nico wonders why they can’t just be a functional deck crew. Captain Lee says a very expensive piece of equipment is floating into the sunset in front of the guests.

It’s time for the psychic dinner party. I always love their table settings. This one is all stars and planets and such, with faux crystal balls at each place. And Captain Lee is totally dressed up in his formal uniform. Ha-ha! They have the same salad tongs we used to use for our RHPS reenactments back in the day. Rebecca tells the captain that his mother is there, but she hasn’t passed away. This is way too funny. Rebecca gets flustered. In his interview, Captain Lee says it’s a crock. Rebecca keeps trying, saying he’s always been in love with the sea. He never even saw it until he was 35. She bats a thousand.

Scott gives his seat to Kate for a reading. Rebecca tells her that she’ll have a dog one day. What? Rebecca talks about a man being close to her. HAHAHA! Tall, dark and handsome. I didn’t know they actually said that. Ben wonders if she’s talking about him. In her interview, Kate says she is dating someone tall and dark, but they’re lesbians. This psychic is not good at her job at all.

For whatever reason, Emily thinks Rebecca is talking about Ben, and he makes sure they’re good. He tells her that he does love Kate, but not that way. It’s way windy – why didn’t the psychic predict this? – so the captain moves on. A lot of the guests get seasick. Kelley leaves to pick up the yoga instructor. She’s tiny with a Minnie Mouse voice. Some of the guests do yoga and a few opt for some food. I’m in the latter group. I would have Ben cooking the entire time.

Ben wants to know what the first meal of the day is called because he needs structure. He demands to know if it’s brunch or breakfast. Kate says the primary is sick and she’s not interrupting the yoga class. There’s a mini-argument.

The captain calls Kelley to the wheelhouse. He wants to know what happened with the pool. Kelley throws Kyle under the bus for not attaching a line. In his interview, Captain Lee says the deck crew isn’t living up to expectation.

Ben says it would be nice if someone knew when they guests were eating, incluing the guests. The captain radios them to hold it down, since he can hear them on the bridge, which means the guests can too. Emerson and Blake make jokes about mommy and daddy fighting. Ben pops his head in and says sorry. They tell him that as long as the drinks keep coming, they’re fine. Truth!

Ben apologizes to Emily for fighting with Kate, since it’s not a good look, and then apologizes to Kate. It’s dinner time. At least I think it’s called dinner. It’s filet mignon anyway. Rebecca talks about her vast experience. She thinks her mother is leaving phone messages and God is telling her she’s right. After dinner, one of the psychics sits down for a reading with Emily. Ben horns in and asks if he and Emily have a future. She’s hesitant and says she doesn’t know everything. In her interview, Lauren thinks he’s being unprofessional and Emily thinks it’s inappropriate.

Ben asks the psychic if he and Emily will work out, and the psychic says no. So he asks Emily for a date. She says okay, but in her interview says that she doesn’t like the circumstances, and feels under pressure and out of sorts. Ben says he’ll see them both in the morning, and the psychic asks him not to poison her coffee. Not too awkward. I have to mention that Emily has rainbow earrings that match her headband and I totally approve.

Sierra tells Ben it was an intense and interesting night. She wonders why Emily said she was out of sorts. When Ben explains, Sierra tells him he was stupid. He tells her to get lost, and she asks if it went well. When he says no, she repeats that it was stupid. In his interview, Ben says he thought you’re supposed to challenge psychics. I dunno about that. They never receive it well when they’re wrong. I’ve seen John Edward have a few hissy fits when challenged.

It’s time for the guests to leave. Ben apologizes to Emily again. Rebecca tells Ben there’s still some good stuff going on, and they were the best crew ever. She thanks them for being open. Afterward, Emily asks who she was looking at when she said that to Ben, and Sierra says it was Emily and that Ben really likes her.

Ben calls older brother James, and asks him to come for a visit. When he asks why, Ben says he misses him and it would be a good time.

The tips is $15,000, $1350 each. Captain Lee chastises the deck crew for not being able to get it together with the pool. Nico implies it was Kelley’s fault. The captain doesn’t care what prompted it, and tells them just don’t let it happen again. He tells them to enjoy their afternoon, but remember tomorrow is a hard work day.

Nico and Kyle make fun of Kelley. Everyone gets ready to go out.

Ben and Emily go to dinner. They’re glad to be away from the crazies. Lauren and Nico check out the full moon from the boat. Kate uses her facial cleansing brush while talking to Ro.

Ben is ticked about what the psychic said, and Emily tells him to forget about it. She says to just look at it as a shared experience. He suggests they go for a stroll. They go to a really pretty tiki-ish beach place. Emily thinks he’s a true gentleman. She gets the hiccups. He says he knows a cure, and kisses her. She says it worked.

Ben and Emily sit and talk back at the boat. In her interview, Kate says they’re on a cloud of happiness. Kyle and Kate join them, and Kyle shows them videos of himself “doing stupid stuff.” We see one of him dancing on stage and he says he came out to his dad with this song, confusing everyone.

He talks about having a trans woman girlfriend at the time. He says when he was younger, he was hanging out at bars and hooked up with a trans woman by accident, and realized it was his preference. In his interview, he says at first he thought he was bi-sexual, but it was more specific. Ben says he’s fond of Kyle and doesn’t want to pry, but has no knowledge of these things. We see pics of Kyle with his girlfriend. Ben says he’s full of surprises and Kate says she knew she liked him. I like him too, but why was he so miffed about Sierra then?

Next time, Kyle discusses his sexuality, there’s a surprise drag show, and a chewy conch.

Side note: The movie Trolls looks great, but I’m getting tired of little trolls dancing at the bottom of the screen while I’m trying to watch the show.

Nov1

October 31, 2016 – GH on the Fly & an OC Good-by

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

The condensed (for me) version, because Halloween. The spellcheck also isn’t working on my site today, so forgive any typos.

Valentin says he’s a free man. Must be a technicality. He has a document that grants him unconditional release from the Greek authorities. Of course everyone thinks he’s lying. He pled self-defense.

Valentin likes Ava’s new hairdo. I like that he noticed she changed it. He’s definitely smooth. He wants to become acquainted with his sister Alexis and the rest of the family, but they’re not receptive. Dante calls Jordan and yep, Valentin is free on a legal technicality. Called it.

Love, love, love Kiki’s steampunk outfit. I have one of tose little hats. I’ll bet she got it at Spirit Halloween.

Is Morgan really here?

Nina meets Charlotte, who has run away from Griff. Griff has been looking for her and explains to Nina that she’s his daughter. Nina brings out a bunch of costumes for Charlotte to pick from. She’d been hoping to look after Nathan’s daughter, but realizes that’s out the window. Griff says Claudette is missing, but they don’t know the story.

The Floating Rib is rocking. Franco the mime wonders why Elizabeth is there with Jason when she said she was spending time with the boys. Elizabeth tells him that Jason is there to pick up Jake. Franco tells Jason to let Monica know she’s welcome for him saving GH. Jason and Jake leave, and Elizabeth asks if Franco has to assume the worst when she’s with Jason. Apparently so. Dillon shows up as Elvis.

Sonny tells Morgan he’s sorry, and Morgan forgives him. They hug, and Morgan isn’t Morgan any more, but a guy who tells Sonny to get off of him.

Elizabeth tells Franco that she and Json will always be connected – it’s part of the package. She asks if Franco would like her jealous of Nina. Franco tells her that he feels like they’re too polite together.

Everyone is annoyed about Valentin skating on the murder charges. He says it’s Ava’s word against his. He claims he shot Nicholas in self=defense, and Doc was an accident.

Kiki says that seeing Dillon reminds her of everything she did wrong. Dillon says she’s not responsible for what happened, but she says she’s responsible for what led up to it. Like she should have babysat Morgan. She says she was disloyal for being happy with Dillon. She asks him to go.

The kid at Sonny’s came on a dare. His friends encouraged him to go trick-or-treating at “the godfather’s house.” Sonny roughs him up for pretending to be Morgan and the kid calls him crazy.

Doc brings up the attempted kidnappng of Spencer, and Valentin has an answer for that too. The deal he struck got rid of all charges in the US. Anna is taking the case. Valentin says this is his home now. He hands Alexis the papers.

Charlotte freaks out at The Floating Rib, wanting mommy.

Sonny tells the kid he disreapected him and his son. Jason comes in just in time, and the kid skedaddles. Jason tells Sonny he’s checking on him. Sonny says he’s doing just great; his son is gone and he’ll never see him again. For a moment, he thought everything was okay, but Morgan is dead because of something he did.

Nina explains how Charlotte changed fathes to Dillon.

Ava tells Valentin that  he’d won; he didn’t have to shoot Nicholas. Valentin insists it was an accident. Laura givs the papers back to Valentin. He says they can live together peacefully and become friends. Lulu asks what he wants.

Charlotte screams like a banshee, and says she hates Griff. Elizabeth intervenes. She says blah blah, mom loves her, but daddy does too. Charlotte is dressed as a nurse and Elizabeth says that she’s a nurse too. She works with her daddy who’s a doctor.

Jason tells Sonny about a guy named Christoph, who’s bomb signature matches the one in the car. He says the cops are trying to link him to Sonny, and if they’re chasing a false lead, it could work to his advantage. Sonny says it won’t change anything about his responsibility. Morgan, who Sonny sees on the couch, tells him that he told Morgan to take responsibility, not it’s his turn.

Valentin says he’s sorry; he has childhood abandonment issues. He wants to prove himself to the family. He says he’ll give them some time to process things and leaves.

Griff thanks Elizabeth, who says she’s an old hand at tantrums. Griff says he’s going to deal with explaining about Clauette tomorrow.

 

Franco tells Kiki that he can’t turn his back on Elizabeth for a second; she’s not even safe with a priest. Kiki tells him to quit being insecure and jealous; he’s sounding like Morgan. Franco says yeah, and Morgan had nothing to worry about.

Franco makes a crack about Griff to Elizabeth. She’s like, what the hell, she was just helping a friend and he’s acting like a moron. He says they’ve been set back a few times. Elizabeth says he knows how she feels, but he says he wants to know if what’s happening between them is real. She asks if he’s talking about sex, and Franco says no, yes, are they going to have it?

Not-really-there Morgan tells Sonny he has to make it right. Jason asks how much Sonny has had to drink, and Sonny says not enough to pass out. He tells Jason that he’s a bad man with many failings, but not a coward. He has to live with a son being dead because of him, and he might not be sober, but he’ll be sane. Jason tells him to get some sleep and offers to stay. Vision Morgan tells Sonny to send him away. He knows what he has to do. He has his piece.

Franco tells Elizabeth that he has real feelings and needs to know if what they have is real. Elizabeth says she wants to really, really get to know him, and when the time is right, they’ll most likely end up in bed. She lays a tremendous kiss on him.

Ava tells Laura that Valentin murdered Nicholas without a second thought, and thinks he’d murder anyone who got in his way. Doc asks about Spencer. Laura says he’s safe, but the school is stepping up security. She’s shocked about the house being stolen out from underneath her. She says if he thinks they can get along, he’s insane. Sam tells Alexis she’s sorry, but Alexis says she needs to know what she’s dealing with. Dante calls Griff.

Griff tells Charlotte that in spite of his mistakes, God gave her to him, and he’s keeping her safe.

Valentin enters the office at Crimson, and tells Nina hello.

Sonny tells Jason to leave; he’s going to sleep. Jason says Max is outside, and he’s just a cell phone call away if Sonny needs anything. They say good-by.

Spectre Morgan gives a thumbs up. Sonny calls Diane. He wants to know what he owns legally offshore, and tells her he wants to get his affairs in order. In-Sonny’s-head Morgan tells him good-by and disappears.

I have no clue what’s happening tomorrow, because Halloween.

The Real Housewives of the OC

Meghan wants to be with her family when she and Jim learn the sex of their baby. The doctor has helped them have a cake made, where the inside icing will either be pink or blue. They cut the cake and it’s pink. In her interview, Meghan says she’d like to give Jim a boy, but she’s excited about having a girl. We flash back to her IVF treatments and how difficult the whole process has been.

Vicki and Briana check out Briana’s new house. The renovations are taking forever and they’ve totally blown the budget. Briana has brought her interior designer along. In her interview, Briana says, as usual, her mom is overly involved. They talk about Tamra’s party, and Vicki says they’ve had a roller coaster relationship for years. Briana thinks she’s being used as a buffer, but she’s okay with it because she cares about both of them.

Shannon talks to David about the party for Tamra, and how Vicki and Kelly are invited because Tamra wanted them on the guest list. David isn’t thrilled about having Vicki over and neither is Shannon. David says he’ll just suck it up. They’re taking one for the Tamra team.

Everyone gets ready for the party. Things are going well with Kelly and Michael. She says he’s been looking after her concerns and is attentive, and maybe you can teach an old dog new tricks. Meghan comes by, and Kelly says Shannon thinks she owes her an apology, even though they were both wrong. Meghan thinks Kelly should just apologize first. In her interview, she says she saw a side of Heather on the Ireland trip that she didn’t like, and that she can be coniving. She tells Kelly that she can give low blows, like telling Shannon she had hair on her chin. Kelly jokes that it wasn’t mean, she was just helping a sister out. To our discredit, Meghan and I both laugh.

Shannon tells her makeup person that she’s not into seeing Vicki or Kelly at the party. She says Vicki crossed the line and you never know what you’re going to get with Kelly.

Tamra is pissed because Vicki said something about Eddie a hundred years ago, even though Eddie couldn’t care less. In her interview, it sounds like she’s being angry in retrospect about things that Vicki has done. Eddie gives Tamra a pair of Louis Vuitton shoes and now I’m wondering if he’s gay. JUST KIDDING. I think.

Terry asks Heather what the party is about, and immediately Heather starts gossiping about Vicki and Kelly. We flash back to how some of the girls foisted alcohol on Kelly in Ireland. Heather says she’s seen who they are and she gets it. Whatever that means. Heather has contributed a donut tower to the party.

The donut tower collapses and Tamra scarfs up the donuts on the ground, since she’s been deprived for so long. Really just kidding this time. But only because she’s not there yet.

Vicki has written a nice apology letter to Shannon, saying she’s in a better place and hopes they can make a fresh start and move on. She tells Briana that Shannon will never take any responsibility, so she’s willing to do it. In her interview, Vicki says she doesn’t want any conflict with the girls any more, and just wants to move on. It will never happen. Never. They are totally in the stuck position with Vicki. Except for Meghan, who threw me for a loop this season. Maybe she just needed to be more hormonal.

The honored guest arrives. Ha-ha! There’s one of those things you put your head through to take a picture and it’s Tamra’s body. Everyone attacks the donuts. Tamra and Mia talk about her next fitness goal. No rest for the wicked. Heather and Shannon are all kissy-kissy. Shannon tells Heather about the donut tower, and we flash back to the cake bow incident. I’d forgotten about that. Another time when I thought Heather overreacted. Tamra makes nasty remarks about a nice text Vicki sent to her. She teleports across the room the second Vicki enters the party. Vicki gives Shannon the card. In her interview, Shannon isn’t pleased. She doesn’t like that Vicki couldn’t “woman up” and tell her in person. Well, some people write better than they talk. I don’t think anything would be enough though. Vicki hunts down Tamra and asks if she got the text, and Tamra pretends she didn’t. What an a-hole she is.

Meghan, Kelly and Michael arrive. Meghan tells everyone it’s a girl. Vicki asks her about names and such. Tamra, Heather and Shannon sit apart from them. Shannon says it’s been 15 days since they came back from Ireland and now Vicki is apologizing. Vicki tells Kelly that the clique is clique-ing. Kelly says when you have a party, you should want to make everyone comfortable. I agree. I don’t get why Tamra wanted her there if she was just going to be rude. I also don’t like the public confrontation stuff.

Meghan joins the clique. Shannon gripes about the late apology. Meghan talks about Kelly wanting to apologize, but feeling like she was being ganged up on, and that they were trying to get her drunk. Shannon jokes about a conspiracy theory, and wonders if Kelly thinks she’s involved with JFK’s death too. Meghan tells Heather that Kelly thinks she’s meddling, and says Heather was whispering about her. Of course Heather justifies what she did. Meghan says she likes Kelly. Healther says it’s so vile, Vicki and Kelly belong together.

I’ve decided that Tamra should invest in a dictionary since she can’t come up with anything better to say than the f-word. I’m not opposed to it, but she’s like Johnny One-Note. Any time she doesn’t like what someone says, it’s an immediate f-u.

Tamra has ice-breaking gifts that are also an f-u to Vicki. What did I just say? They’re “mug shots” of each woman, with their charges underneath them. Kelly’s is public drunkeness; Shannon’s, judgy eyes; Meghan’s, concealing a child; Heather’s, being too fancy. Since Vicki realized she wasn’t wanted, she wandered off to the bar, but Tamra tracks her down. Her charge is lying. Vicki acts like it’s a big joke. In her interview, Tamra says she’s going to put it on a bumper sticker next. What is wrong with this woman? I probably say that at least three times during every Wives episode. In her interview, Vicki says Tamra is trying to bait her, and she’ll be polite, but the shirt is going in the garbage.

Kelly wants to talk to Shannon about their “miscommunication.” Shannon says she’d made amends with Kelly, and then Kelly dared to say she had hair on her chin. Like that came out of the blue. Shannon says this is the first time she’s heard Kelly say that she’s wrong, and talks about the lies that could hurt her children, dragging Vicki into it. Kelly says she was wrong, but felt backed into a corner. Shannon says what the two of them repeated wasn’t true, but now it’s out there. Heather tries putting in her two cents, but Kelly calls her an interloper and wants to know why Heather is after her. Heather says that Kelly lashes out and says mean things; saying horrible stuff and then apologizing is her algorithm. Please. Fancy isn’t the word. Kelly talks about Heather saying she was having a mental breakdown, and Heather says she is. Kelly calls her insecure for interfering in other people’s business. Heather says she wanted to like her.

Vicki starts to walk away and Heather says don’t move. Really, she says that. She tells Vicki she has things to answer for.Vicki says she’s not going on the witness stand again, and Tamra tells her to quit talking about people. She says Vicki is insecure because she dated a d-bag, and Vicki agrees that she did. Tamra says bottom line, Vivki needs to stop talking about people and STFU.

Vicki tells Tamra to stop talking about her. We flash back to Tamra talking about Vicki. Vicki says she’s not apologizing anymore. In her interview, she says if you don’t like people talking about you, stop talking about people; it’s that simple. Vicki tells Tamra that she doens’t want any more mean girl stuff, and heads for the door. Shannon stops her, saying she can write an apology, but can’t say it? Vicki says sorry. Shannon says she draws the line at her children. She tells Vicki that they had fun together in Ireland, but then she realized she was back in bed with the devil. Why does it always have to be so dramatic? Vicki says she’s worried about her. Shannon says that she and David renewed their vows and they’re fine. She saysshe and Vicki are done, even though she has empathy for her. Vicki is pretty apathetic through Shannon’s whole tirade, and says fine, have a nice life. In her interview, she says she doesn’t want to be around toxic people anymore.

Shannon and Heather talk about Vicki. In her interview, Heather says sometimes relationships aren’t salvagable and it’s time to move on. She doesn’t know the future with either Kelly or Vicki.

It’s the finale, so they have the blurbs about what’s happening now, along with a few parting sentences. Meghan feels that she’s not so sure she wants her child exposed to this nonsense, and is thinking about a permanent move back to St. Louis.

Briana approaches Tamra and asks if she’ll talk to Vicki. Tamra says she will for Briana. Briana thinks Vicki’s deflection and lack of taking responsibility have cost a lot in regard to her friendships. Vicki apologizes to Tamra for repeating a rumor. Tamra says that Vicki continuously talks about people, and it’s vicious, like her saying David beat Shannon. Vicki says she worries about Shannon. Tamra trots away from her, saying Shannon is fine and Vicki is a bitch. Her final Christian parting shot. Vicki tells Briana, let’s go. We flash back to Vicki’s apologies at the beginning of the year. She tells Briana that she thought they cold move forward, but she’s tired of their accusations and she’s done.

Tamra says sometimes you have to let people go, and a lot of blah blah blah.

Vicki tells Briana that she hates conflict, but every time she thinks it’s done, something else happens. The end blurbs aren’t very interesting, although Briana was diagnosed with Lupus, so at least that puts her health issue to rest.

Next time, the reunion. Same advice as for New Jersey – duck and run.

🎃 Hope everyone had a happy and safe Halloween! 🎃

Oct31

October 30, 2016 – Captain Nemo Finds Storybrooke, Carol Finds a King & Siggy Finds No Closure

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What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

Once Upon a Time

Long ago, on the Jolly Roger, Hook yells at the crew for being slow. One of the men says they’re tired and Hook asks who dares defy him?. It’s a stowaway who says he’s no one and wants to ask him a simple question. He asks if taking revenge on the Dark One has been worth the time and effort. Hook says he’ll have to settle for him first, but suddenly sees what he thinks is a sea monster. The stowaway tells him there isn’t one, and he’s saving Hook’s life. He pushes him into the water and dives in after him.

In Storybrooke, Regina hunts down the Evil Queen for a little chat. The Queen insults her lack of entrance flair. Zelena joins them. Regina says that her masquerade as a cricket therapist didn’t work.

Snow and David are inside Zelena’s house. Snow lets Jiminy Cricket out of his cage. I’ll say it again – he’s so cute! I want one.

The Evil Queen says she’s not there just to gloat, she’s there for something else. Zelena runs inside where David and Snow are. The Evil Queen says the real fun can begin and Regina appears in between them, poof! in a puff of purple smoke. She tells the Evil Queen to bring it on.

At Granny’s, Jasmine tells Aladdin they haven’t talked about Agribah – they still need his help. He doesn’t want to hear about it and leaves the diner.

Hook joins Henry and Emma for breakfast, but Emma gets a text from Jasmine that she doesn’t know where Aladdin is. Emma and leaves to help find him. Hook tosses Henry’s Pop Tarts in the trash and says he’s going to make him a pirate’s breakfast of grapefruit and mackerel. I have to admit, it’s a lot healthier. God only knows what’s in a Pop Tart. I won’t touch them. Henry takes the trash out.

The Evil Queen is waiting outside, and asks Henry if his new father is bothering him. Henry says Hook isn’t his father, but she says he may be soon. She says she knows what it’s like to be that person, and Henry says Hook isn’t like her. She shows him a box that Hook was fooling around with, and he finds the shears. The one thing that can take away what makes Emma special. She says Hook doesn’t care about Henry or Emma, and he needs to asks himself what he’s going to do about it.She disappears, poof! in a cloud of purple smoke. Copycat.

Emma catches Aladdin breaking into a car. He says it’s his, and she says they need to talk. He says he knows Jasmine sent her.

Hook looks for Henry. He sees that the shears are gone.

Back in the day, Hook comes to on a submarine. A man with a harpoon tells Hook welcome aboard. Hook punches him out and asks where he is. He asks what magic this is, and a captain welcomes him to the Nautilus, saying to call him Nemo. Hook asks what he wants. Nemo says the ship is a second chance. Hook says he’s not staying. Nemo says he knows Hook’s heart is full of hatred and seeking revenge, and he finds people like him. The one thing missing in his life is family. Hook says no one will replace what the Dark One took. Nemo says he knows how it feels. He lost a family too, brutally murdered while he was at sea. He spent decades hunting the murderers down. When he was finished, all he was left with was an empty heart and a blood-stained harpoon.

Hook wants out, but Nemo needs his help with a mission. He tell Hook that when it’s done, he’ll see this ship is where he belongs.

Hook finds Henry at the docks and asks what he’s doing there. Henry says what his mom wanted Hook to do. Hook says he’s trying to protect Emma. They see something rise out of the water and start to run, but their path is blocked by a guy who says the captain wants to see Hook.

Henry and Hook are taken on to the Nautilus. Hook opens the window shade and it’s super cool under the water. The ship is pretty amazing too.

Snow and David meet at the hospital. Another refugee from the Land of Untold Stories has been brought in. David is going to go to the station to see if he’s been reported missing. Snow sees Belle in the waiting room. She’s getting her first ultrasound. She doesn’t want Rumpel to be a part of anything, but doesn’t know how to deal with it. Snow says she doesn’t have to deal with it for three trimesters.

Henry wonders what would happen if Hook had just gotten rid of the shears. He says he’s saving her life. Henry says her being the Savior is what brought them together, and Hook doesn’t get to make decisions since he not part of the family. Henry says they’re just going to be fish food now anyway. Hook says the captain isn’t someone he’s going to want to meet.

Way back when, Nemo and Hook are in old-fashioned diving suits with those big round helmets. Nemo tells him stay on the path. They go through a cavern. Another diver says he’d give his life for Nemo. His family was taken for him and he grew up on the docks, vowing revenge, and Nemo saved his life. Hook asks if he found those who wronged him. They guy says no, and Hook says he shouldn’t give up so easily.

They come across a huge treasure chest. Nemo says there’s more than gold and jewels in it. Hook tries to back away and a giant squid grabs him. Nemo said stay on the path, dude. The squid is awesome, all tentacles and teeth. Nemo harpoons it. Good-by giant squid! Nemo says Hook is stubborn, but he hasn’t given up on him. He’s part of the family.

Rumpel as Gold visits the Evil Queen. She says she’s driving a wedge through the Charming clan and asks if he’d care to join her. He asks if she remembers her lessons. Never take what’s his being the most important one. He says the shears are gone, and he can smell her magic all over it. The Evil Queen realizes he wants to use them on Belle so he can change the fate of his family. She tells him like everyone he’s ever loved, the shears are long gone. He tells her to be careful who she crosses; she might need an ally. She says you don’t need allies when you win, and she’s doing fine without him.

Emma drives Aladdin out to the woods. She shows him the Welcome to Storybrooke sign. She shows him the base where a car hit it. She says she hit it after Henry tried to convince her she was the Savior. She says it wasn’t the only time. Yesterday when he gave her the shears, she was worried she might use them. She imagines her family having to watch her die. She says she ran, but came back to face the people she disappointed, and tried to make up for her mistakes. He says he doesn’t know how to fix things in Argribah. She tells him finding out what happened is a good place to start.

Hook tells Henry he killed his own father. When he did it, he didn’t just take his life. He had a son, named Liam after Hook’s older brother, and he left an innocent boy an orphan.

In the past, Nemo shows Hook a key. He says all they do is sail with no place to call home. This key opens the gateway to the Mysterious Island, where you can start over. He tells Hook this is his chance. Hook says he can’t give up now. Nemo says Hook has lost people he loves and doesn’t want to open his heart, but the island is a place where he never has to lose anyone again. He asks Hook to join his crew. Hook asks where he got the key, and Nemo says it belongs to his first mate. He was a young boy when his father was murdered. He tells Hook his first mate’s name is Liam.

Fast forwarding, Henry thinks Hook is trying to make up for Liam with him. He says Hook can’t do that, but maybe he can, and shows him the shears. He says, first rule of kidnapping is they never search the kid. Hook gives Henry a diving suit. He says there’s only one helmet, so he’s not going. He says if only one of them can go back to Emma, it’s Henry. Henry dives into the water.

Back in time, Liam approaches, calling Hook “brother.” He says he’s been waiting a long time for this and produces a weapon.

Hook runs farther into the submarine. He sees Nemo who tells him that running from Liam won’t solve anything. Liam is like a son to him and gave up seeking vengeance. Liam enters, saying he was a son to someone else once too. Nemo says killing Hook won’t quench the fire inside him. Liam tells Nemo that’s easy for him to say; he got his revenge. Nemo says they were so close to finding a home. Liam says his heart is no stronger than the captain’s. Nemo gets in between Hook and Liam, and Liam stabs Nemo accidentally. Hook says Liam deserves better, and hopes he finds it. He jumps into the water.

In the present, Liam tells Hook he’s taken everything, his father and Nemo. Hook realizes the Mysterious Island is the Land of Untold Stories, and Nemo is in Storybrooke. Liam says that Hyde took Nemo, and he’s dead because of Hook. Henry returns and tells Liam to stop. While he’s distracted, Hook knocks him out. Hook says he told Henry to leave, and Henry says if he had Hook would be dead. Hook says he couldn’t see another family ruined, and Henry says neither could he.

Hook says he won’t use the shears if Henry doens’t want him to. They’ll find another way to save Emma; the decisions don’t have to come true. He puts the shears in a chest and it sinks into the water.

Aladdin approaches Jasmine. He apologizes. She says she knows he feels guilty, but there’s more he needs to know. He says he might not be the Savior anymore, but if they go back to Agribah, he might be able to help. Jasmine says she went to a neighboring kingdom seeking an alliance. She got caught in a sandstorm on the way back, and when she got there, Agribah was gone. Way to end their storyline.

Belle asks Snow about the patient that was brought in. Snow says he’s in surgery, but the doctor thinks he has a chance. Belle has two copies of the sonogram. Snow asks if she’s giving one to Gold. Belle doesn’t know if he can ever repair things. She does know the son in her dream looked at him with hatred. She wishes things could turn out differently.

The patient is Liam. Hook sits next to the bed and tells him he’s in the hospital. He’s surprised Hook didn’t kill him, but Hook says he has something to live for now. Liam realized if he killed Hook in front of Henry, he’d be creating another boy filled with hate. He wishes Nemo could see them.

Nemo is wheeled in. He was found this morning, and was the patient in surgery. He and Liam join hands and Hook goes to the waiting room. Emma is confused as to what happened. Hook says he’ll fill her in, and Henry jets. He says everything that happened was his fault. Henry was looking to right a wrong. He didn’t dispose of the shears, thinking it might help save her even if she hated him for it. He says Henry made him see the error of his ways, and they’re at the bottom of the ocean. She says she would have done the same thing. They embrace.

Gold looks at a huge book. He says the pirates and the son worked things out in the end. The Evil Queen tells him that they’re an insipid bunch, too forgiving of each other. She says she’s come to make amends, and has been going about it all wrong. She forgot the most important lesson – know what you want and go after it with everything you have. He asks what she wants. She kisses him. Hmm…

Belle comes to Gold’s shop. She sees it’s closed and slips the sonogram picture under the door.

Gold asks if the Evil Queen wants him. She says something else, but she needs his help. He asks what makes her think he would help her. The Evil Queen says fortunately for him, there are still a few underwater creatures who owe her a favor. She has the shears. He asks what she needs his help with. She tells him that the one thing she’s always wanted is Snow White’s heart and smiles

Next time, the contents of a bottle could destroy Storybrooke, they have 12 hours to figure it out, danger lurks around every corner, and the Evil Queen thinks the cemetery is a good place for endings.

The Walking Dead

Carol is being hauled in a wagon by two guys on horseback that look like knights. Morgan follows.

Zombies attack and Carol falls off. Morgan and the others fight them off. Carol thinks she sees someone she knows, but it’s a zombie. She staggers away while the guys are still fighting. She comes to a house and sees a lady beckon from the window, but it’s a zombie. She slumps against a fence. A zombie is headed toward her and gets it’s face sliced off. Nice one. A bunch of people on horseback come in and dispatch the rest. I’m going with this crowd.

A guy named Daniel says they’ve been looking for Morgan, but it looks like he found some people himself. Morgan fiddles with a mailbox because maybe that zombie mailman from Z Nation is coming along.

Carol sleeps while Morgan sits next to the bed. She wakes to the sound of makeshift wind chimes. She asks how long she’s been asleep and he tells her two days. I always think that would be freaky to wake up and so much time has gone by. But it’s better than American Werewolf in London where he was out for three weeks. She asks where they are.

Morgan wheels her through the town. He says their weapons will be with held until they leave. In about a week, they can go back to Alexandria. The town is called The Kindgom. Morgan says they were helping Carol, so he helped them. It’s beautiful, lots of plants and animals, and Renaissance Faire clothing. Morgan explains the story he gave the man in charge, whose name is King Ezekiel.

Morgan wheels Carol into a building. He tells her Ezekiel does his own thing. They go into an auditorium where Ezekiel sits on a throne with his pet tiger next to him. I like him already. He could possibly save this show for me. I’m getting to the point where I’m tired of it being depressing and more depressing.

Ezekiel tells the tiger to settle down; these are their guests. He says if she’s a friend of Morgan, she’s considered a friend of the realm unless proven otherwise. He introduces himself and welcomes her to The Kingdom. He asks if he detects skepticism, and if she thinks he’s mad. He asks what she thinks of The Kingdom and King. She tells him that she thinks he’s amazing, the place is amazing, and Shiva the tiger is amazing. She says she doesn‘t know what’s going on in the most wonderful way. He says he let’s everyone take what they want as long as they contribute. Drink from the well, replenish the well.

He has one of his men give her some fruit. She says she doesn’t want to be any trouble and she’s not a fruit person. He says if there’s anything she wants or needs, just ask, and mentions they have a great musician. She says more rest and maybe a hairbrush; no one told her she was meeting royalty. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her smile like this, but I don’t know if she’s faking it. They both say it’s a pleasure, and Morgan wheels her out.

Carol is like, what the what? She tells Morgan that this is make believe and she can’t do this. Freakin’ spoilsport. Morgan tries to talk to her. She says when he’s not there to stop her, she’ll go. He says he’ll stop her, but she says it’s not up to him. He says he won’t let her die out there. She says it doesn’t matter what he does.

Is she kidding? This place is awesome!

Ezekiel and company hunt some wild pigs. They drive them to a place where a zombie is hanging from the ceiling, because they want the pigs’ bellies full of rot. I don’t get that, but okay. Some zombies wander up and one of the guys, Benjamin, is learning how to kill them. He doesn’t quite get it, so Ezekiel finishes the zombie off. Morgan is told that no one back at The Kingdom needs to know about any of this. Ezekiel yells to the zombies that one day they will be released from the curse and in the meantime, they live in their place. I’m fascinated.

Back at The Kingdom, Ezekiel asks Morgan how he acquired his skills with the staff. Morgan says from a cheese-maker. Ezekiel says Benjamin’s path is in need of adjustment, and asks if Morgan will train him. Morgan says the staff could have saved the man he shot to save Carol. Ezekiel says like it saved Morgan. He needs Benjamin to live because he’ll be an important member of his staff. Morgan agrees, and Ezekiel says The Kingdom is favored by his presence again.

Carol sits in her room. Shiva suns herself and an acapella choir sings It’s All Right. Morgan shows Benjamin how to use the staff. Watching Benjamin reminds me of one of my martial arts workout DVDs. Carol wheels around the place, faking it, acting all nice to a guy and pretending to be over the moon about some cobbler. She pretends to tear up about how great the town is, and asks for a tissue. She steals some clothing when they guy has his back turned. She’s pissing me off.

Benjamin asks about Morgan’s book. Morgan tells him it’s philosophy. Benjamin says he’s read all the books there several times, and air conditioning manuals are boring. Morgan gives him the book. Ezekiel tells them they have matters of import to attend to.

He says the swine are slaughtered far from the kindgom. It’s a secret and secrets are burdens that come with a cost. A bunch of guys get out of cars and meet them. They belong to the Saviors (not to be confused with Emma and Aladdin in the previous show). Ezekiel says their arrangement is important. Oooh, I think I’m getting this. One of the guys says the pigs look bigger than last time, and Ezekiel’s man, Richard, says they were well fed. The man asks for help loading them into the truck. A woman starts to quietly tell Morgan they’re from another group, but Morgan says he knows who they are. Apparently, Ezekiel is trying to poison the Saviors or turn them into zombies.

The guys load the truck. One of the Saviors tells them they’ve gotten off easy. Richard says maybe he has it backwards. They start to fight. Guns are drawn. Ezekiel says to lower their weapons and tells Richard to let him go; this isn’t what they do. The guy gets in a few more punches until he’s made to stop. He’s a real a-hole. Ezekiel tells Richard they’ll discuss it. The Savior says it’s produce week next week, so they’d better produce or Richard is going first.

Ezekial asks if the man Morgan killed to save Carol was one of them. Morgan says yes, and asks if that’s why Ezekiel wanted him here, because he could do it again? Ezekiel says the opposite.

It’s movie night! Everyone is finishing up dinner and Benjamin and Morgan talk. Benjamin is raising a little boy. He says Ezekiel was tight with his father, who was a good fighter. He was sent out to clear a building, but there wasn’t enough back-up and eight men didn’t make it out. His father was one of them. He says Ezekiel is more careful now. He’s keeping his deal with the Saviors because they want to fight, but don’t want to lose people. Morgan asks if Benjamin agrees, but he says he doesn’t know enough to know.

Benjamin asks about an inscription in the book about not killing. Morgan says he didn’t write it, but it’s not about what he thinks. People can point you in the right direction, but can’t show you the way. You have to find that for yourself. He says he’s just fumbling through, and sometimes we change our minds. He leaves to talk to Carol.

Carol is gone. Good. She was no fun anyway. Morgan sits on the bed and smiles.

Carol limps around to the apple tree. Ezekiel tells her to help herself. The garden is his favorite place, and he’s glad she saw it before she left . She apologizes, but asks what good she is there. Ezekiel tells her to never bullsh*t a bullsh*tter. He says the sweet and innocent act is clever. Blend in, get people to trust her, get what she needs, and disappear. He says the gun she has belongs to the Saviors, and she did more than put up a fight – she won. She says by ending up here? and he asks if it’s funny. She tells him that this place is a joke, and out there it’s real. She says he’s selling people a fairy tale. He says maybe they need one. She asks if having his ass kissed is a perk.

Ezekiel sits with her. He says people want someone to follow; it’s human nature. They want someone to make them feel safe, and people who feel safe are less dangerous and more productive. They see a dude with a tiger and make him larger than life, a hero. Who is he to burst their bubble? They needed someone to follow, so he faked it until he made it. He was a zoo keeper and Shiva fell into a moat. There was no medical assistance, and she was hurt and going to bleed out. He knew the risk, but she was in pain, so he saved her life. After that she never even showed a tooth in his direction. She could do a lot of damage, but she hasn’t and won’t. He lost a lot like everyone else. When it started to end, he came back to the zoo. Shiva was alone, hungry, and trapped, like him. She was the last thing left in the world he loved. She protected him, got him here, and made him larger than life. He used to act in community theater and played some kings. He says his name is really Ezekiel though. Cards on the table, nothing up his sleeve, but appreciates it if she keeps it between them, at least for now.

Carol says she doesn’t care. Do what he wants. She’s going to go. He asks where? She says away. He says he’s sorry for whatever bad she’s been through. There’s too much of it out there. It feels like it’s all bad, especially when you’re alone, but it’s not all bad. Where there’s life, there’s hope, heroism, grace, and love. He hopes that she’s not walking away from life. He made his own world. He found a way to embrace the contradiction, by being over-the-top good. He says maybe he’s crazy, but maybe he can help if she lets him. She asks why he cares, and he says it makes him feel good. He says she can go or not go, see if he’s on to something or it’s more bullsh*t.

Morgan and Carol ride down a road. Morgan asks if she’s sure this is what she wants. She does. They stop at the house where Morgan was fixing the mailbox. He says she’s his favorite person he ever knocked down, or at least in the top two or three. He tells her to take care of herself. She says always watching, always ready. He gets back on his horse and she goes in the gate. He puts the mailbox flag down.

Carol sees the zombie in the house and goes inside brandishing her weapon. She buries the now dead zombie in the yard. She builds a fire and there’s a knock at the door. She hears the tiger. It’s Ezekiel with an apple. He tells her she has to try one. She gives him a real smile. Almost.

Next time, more Negan (sigh), Daryl gets shoved around, and Negan likes it that he doesn’t scare easy.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey

It’s time for Melissa’s fashion show. Siggy and Dolores discuss Jacqueline in the car. Dolores thinks Jacqueline overreacted to her text. She’s been going around saying Dolores set her up to look like a no show.

Preparing for the show, Melissa feels abandoned, since her partner is in the Bahamas. She says she doesn’t know what she’s doing and didn’t sleep last night. The models practice their walks.

Jacqueline is on the couch hacking and coughing. She tells Chris that she wouldn’t have gone to the fashion show even if she wasn’t sick. Chris thinks that some of her friends aren’t really her friends. He thinks she should get to the bottom of why Dolores asked if she was coming to the fashion show when she knew Jacqueline was sick. Um…maybe she forgot or was just making conversation. The overreaction is trickling down.
The Wakiles and Teresa cross paths at the bar, and it’s awkward. In her interview, Teresa says she’s done with her cousins and there’s no confusion about that. She doesn’t wish anyone ill will, she just wants to be left alone. Joe #2 and Richie talk. Teresa tells Melissa she wants to be there for her, but she feels sad. It’s her first event without Joe #1.

Siggy and Dolores arrive. Dolores tells Kathy about calling Jacqueline and that Jacqueline is paranoid that she was being set up. I’m not getting this. Does Jacqueline think Dolores was trying to catch her in a lie about being sick? Kathy asks if Dolores is open to talking to Jacqueline, but Dolores says she’s too angry right now. She shows Kathy the text. Teresa joins them. She says she wishes Jacqueline the best, but she’s evil. Kathy insists she’s not.

Melissa gets the models ready. She’s nervous and gets a glass of wine. Teresa tells Siggy that she walked into something with Kathy and Dolores. Siggy says Jacqueline got weird with Dolores. In her interview, Teresa says Jacqueline is sweet at first, but then you get to know her.

Backstage, things are crazy. The music starts. The models begin to walk the runway. Melissa runs around like a nut, telling everyone they need to move faster. All of a sudden, no one is on stage and she doesn’t know what to do. Melissa starts to freak, but everything falls back into place. The clothes are really cute.

Melissa makes a speech, thanking everyone at Envy and her family. Joe #2 is proud of her. She turned a crumb into a cake. She talks about feeling a tug on her pillow the night before and no one being there, but she had “a feeling.” That morning, her mother reminded her that it was the anniversary of her father’s death and she feels like he’s there.

Siggy asks Melissa to lunch on Friday. She’s invited everyone because she wants closure. She says Jacqueline is fighting with Dolores now, and she wants everyone to say their peace without fighting and walk away like ladies. Good luck with that. In her interview, Siggy says she wants everyone to move forward and shut up. She’s hoping Jacqueline comes.

Dolores meets Frank for lunch. She tells him he said the kitchen would never get done and it happened. She adds that he won’t be getting a bill because she’s on a payment plan with the contractor. Frank is the best ex-husband in the world. Next to Bruce Willis. He jokes that she’s breaking up with him, and she says she’s just taking the pressure off. In her interview, Dolores says Frank is in another relationship, but they have a bond that can’t be broken. He feels concerned that she doesn’t want help anymore. She says he’s like a part of her, and it’s just the financial help she doesn’t need.

Frank tells Dolores that her father took him aside when the problems started, and said sh*t happens, but you never turn your back on your family and children, and he’ll always be a part of the family. She wants to get the check. He says he likes the new Dolores, but she tells him don’t get used to it.

Teresa’s lawyer, Jim, comes over. He says he’s gotten a few emails from Joe #1 and she says she missed his call because she was doing yoga. She’s getting certified and needs to put in a certain amount of hours. Jim asks about finances. Teresa says after they got married Joe did everything, but it’s going back to the way it was before that, and she might have to sell the house. She says the kids have been through enough, but she’ll do what it takes to keep things afloat, since Gia is almost college bound. She shows him a framed cover of her new book that the publisher sent. She has one of the last book, and says she’s definitely a different person now and proud of who she is. She can’t wait for Joe to get home. Jim says to never feel like she’s by herelf.

Dolores and her mother are doing some cooking. Siggy comes by, loud as ever, with her own mother, and all of them put together a meal. Siggy thinks their moms are too selfless and should do more for themselves. They sit down to eat, and she toasts to their mothers being wonderful. Siggy says she’ll always take care of her mother the way her mother has taken care of her, and Dolores says her too. Siggy tells them there has to be a way to get the friends back together, but Dolores doesn’t think so.

Melissa comes home to Joe #2 cooking dinner and roses on the table. He tells her to sit down. He’s made chicken cordon bleu. They talk about Melissa’s sales, which are thriving. In her interview, she’s afraid he wants her to scale back. He apologizes for saying she made crumbs where he made cake. He says he loves her and stands by her and he’s a lucky man. He brings out parfaits for dessert. She asks if they’re having cappuccino with candy sticks, and he says he got the kind she likes. She says she’d like his candy stick after dinner and he picks her up out of the chair. These two are so cute.

Siggy is bringing the girls together because she wants Vermont laid to rest. She’s having the lunch at a restaurant because she doesn’t want a repet performance in her house. She removes the knives from the table. She hasn’t heard from Jacqueline, so she doesn’t know if she’s coming, but she’s hired security. She tells some bald guy in a black jacket what the score is.

Melissa tells Teresa that Jacqueline is super paranoid and doesn’t like them together. Teresa says she’s a cuckoo. Melissa is hoping for closure, but the most Teresa thinks she’s getting is a nice lunch.

Jacqueline shows up first. Siggy gets all teary. Jacqueline says she came for Siggy because she knows what it’s like to be in the middle. She says she said horrible things to Teresa in Vermont. She claims Melissa didn’t like her and Teresa being friends. She says she couldn’t even sit down before everyone tried to talk for each other. In her interview, Jacqueline says she wants to make it more comfortable for everyone and is glad to explain where she was coming from. Whatever that insane place might be. Siggy says Dolores loves her. Jacqueline says she knows Dolores explodes, but then gets over it. She wants to get to the bottom of the animosity with Teresa, but has no interest in Melissa.

Dolores joins them and Siggy starts crying again. What is wrong with her? Dolores apologizes to Jacqueline. Jacqueline gives some half-assed explanation about her paranoia. She says she knows Dolores’s heart. She wants to talk to Teresa and Melissa one on one. Siggy tells Jacqueline that Teresa was sincere, but Jacqueline wonders why she took the first opportunity to disband the friendship. This woman is so delusional. The first time she saw Teresa after she got home, she took the opportunity to be insulting, and she did all that finger-in-the-face stuff in Vermont.

The second Teresa and Melissa get in the room, Jacqueline demands that Teresa sit across from her and Melissa leave the room. She wants to talk one on one. She has a ride waiting if they refuse. She says it’s the way she likes to do things. Teresa says she doesn’t call the shots, and she says she is today. Teresa calls her “teacher,” and Jacqueline doesn’t like it. Teresa asks if Miss Teacher is better, and Jacqueline asks if bitch is better. Teresa asks if a word I’m not going to type is better. Jacqueline tells Melissa to leave the room again. Siggy says she’s giving them orders, and no one wants to be spoken to like a child. Teresa says she thinks Jacqueline is evil to the core. Jacqueline wants everyone to leave. I don’t think evil is the word I’d use, but she’s something abnormal. Dolores suggests everyone try something new and speak softly. Jacqueline asks if Teresa needs a back up, and Teresa says yes, she does. She wants everyone to see what’s going on. Joacqueline says call her when she can talk one on one (which will be never) and leaves. In the other room, Jacqueline apologizes to Dolores. In her interview, Jacqueline calls Teresa and Melissa animals. WTF?

Teresa says Jacqueline is a coward. Melissa says when Jacqueline is in a situation where she isn’t controlling things, it’s run, Forest, run. Agreed. Which is why I find her tagline so amusing. Teresa says she’s conniving and twisted. Siggy asks Dolores if she thinks Jacqueline handled things wrong. Dolores does, and they go out to find her. Jacqueline definitely sees them. The car slows down and she sticks her head out the door, but then they drive away. Why don’t they dump this chick?

Dolores says on a good day you don’t speak to an Italian like that. Teresa says Jacqueline wants them out of the room so no one else can tell her she’s wrong. Melissa says if you have nothing to hide, you don’t run. Teresa tells them that Jacqueline is dead to her. Melissa adds that she took off her mask. Dolores thinks no one was mentally prepared for the meeting. Huh?

Teresa says she’s been home three months and it feels like she never left. She thanks them for being supportive.

It’s the finale, so they have the little blurbs about what everyone is doing. It’s all boring. Until we get to Teresa – whose yoga partner is now Danielle Staub. I don’t even know what to say.

Next time, the reunion. Duck and run.