What I Watched Today
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Spencer and Trina kiss. She tells him, don’t stop.
Curtis strides through an empty Savoy, and goes behind the bar. N’neka says, it’s his wedding night. Why isn’t he…? He says he’ll explain another time, and tells her to head home; he’ll close up. He sits down at a table with a fifth of whiskey, and starts drinking shots. N’neka slips out, and makes a call in the back hallway. She says she doesn’t know what’s happening, but they need to get down here, like, now.
Laura tells Alexis that Jordan’s on her way to Windymere, and Alexis asks, what’s at Windymere? (Johnny in Airplane: Well, there’s an island with a big house, and…) Laura says, off the record, a hostage situation, and Alexis asks if it has anything to do with the escapees from Spring Ridge. Doc wonders why she’s asking, and Alexis says, all the victims are linked to Trina Robinson and Esme Prince. That list was compiled to avenge Esme Prince. Laura says, they suspected something like that, but didn’t have any concrete proof, and Doc asks if Alexis knows why The Hook would avenge Esme. Alexis says she doesn’t know why, but she knows who. She knows who The Hook is. It’s Heather Webber.
Ava tells Felicia, it’s best if they leave the island, and send help back for Austin, and Heather says, now that she thinks about it, Ava might want to hang back. Ava asks why she’d want to do that, and Heather says, to finally end this unholy obsession between her and Ryan once and for all. Ava says, that obsession is one-sided, thank you very much. She’ll let the authorities deal with Ryan – again. Heather asks if Ava isn’t the least bit curious to hear what Ryan did to try and get her back, but Ava says, not particularly. Heather says, how he’s responsible for destroying Ava’s life in the process? When she does, she’s going to want to take care of Ryan herself. Felicia says, let’s go, but Ava says she’s listening. How exactly did a man in prison destroy her life? Heather says, isn’t it obvious? Ryan had help.
Ryan runs through the forest looking for Esme, and finds her on the ground, leaning up against a large rock. He tells her, daddy’s here. She can’t be on the ground. It can’t be good for her or the baby. She says, and he is? and he says, right now he’s the best chance for both of them, so let him help. She says her water broke; the baby’s coming. He says, they have to get her back to the house, but he can’t carry her; she’ll have to lean on him. She cries, and tells him to get away from her. The baby’s coming.
Curtis continues to drink, and flashes back to Trina saying, they’re making progress. Marshall says, put that glass down, son.
Spencer asks if Trina knows how long he’s wanted this, and she says she wanted it too, even though everyone told her to stay away. He says, when everything exploded, and she said they couldn’t be friends anymore, he tried to stay away. He stops kissing her, and says he won’t. She means too much to him. She asks, why not?
Laura asks how Heather can be The Hook killer when she was locked up, and Alexis says, she just broke out. What makes Laura think she hasn’t broken out on a regular basis? Laura admits Heather has broken out of other facilities before, and Alexis reminds them about the letter the killer wrote. Doc says he remembers it saying she was avenging someone she cares about, and Alexis says, it was written on an old school typewriter with a very specific keystroke. She called D’Archam, and guess who had access to the exact same machine? Laura says, that explains why they all broke out together, and Doc says, it was a family affair. Alexis says, they clearly know something she doesn’t, so what is she missing?
Ryan puts his coat over Esme, and says, they broke out of prison. It’s the stress that sent her into labor. The good news is, the contractions are just beginning. There’s plenty of time before the baby comes. She asks why she should believe him, and he says, because he’s a doctor, and he’s also her dad. Which is why he couldn’t let her stay in jail. They’re a team, and a damn good one. Just ask Nikolas. She groans in pain, and he tells her, no need to panic. Everything is proceeding normally. She shakes his hand off, and says, this isn’t normal. She tries to get up, but he tells her, right now, he’s the only person who can help her and that precious cargo she’s carrying. Trust him. Daddy knows best.
Felicia thinks they don’t want to stand around while Heather plays mind games with Ava, and Austin struggles to get up. Ava helps him, and Heather says she’s glad he’s awake. Sorry about the hook, but he shouldn’t have used his phone. Ava asks her what she means that Ryan had help, and Heather says, she and Ryan were in Spring Ridge together, and he confided in her. Felicia says, Heather knew he was faking, and didn’t say anything, and Heather says, if only Ava knew how badly he played her. How he insinuated himself into her family, her marriage. She has to admit it was brilliant, but it was sick. Ava gets up, and says, what did Ryan do, and who did he do it with?
Curtis says, Marshall just happened to be in the neighborhood, and Marshall says, don’t blame N’neka. She’s just looking out for her boss, especially when that boss is supposed to be on his honeymoon. Curtis says, Marshall may as well sit down and have a drink with him, and Marshall says he’s not having a drink, but he’d like Curtis to put the cap back on that bottle, so they can deal with whatever happened at the reception. Curtis says he’s sorry Marshall came all the way down here, but the very last thing he wants to do is talk about it. Marshall says, he told Drew that he was done being a no-show when his family needs him. So tough luck – he pulls up a chair – he’s not leaving until they talk this out.
Alexis says, so Ryan is Esme’s father, and Doc says, according to Dante and Sam, who spoke to Esme’s old nanny. Alexis says, so if Ryan is Esme’s father… Doc says, her mother could see herself as an avenging angel, believing she’s protecting her daughter, even if she has to kill for her. Alexis says, Heather Webber is Esme’s mother and Ryan is her father? What a coincidence they all escaped Spring Ridge together. Laura says, now they’re all on the island together. They all look out over the water.
Ryan says, they have to get Esme back to the house, where it’s warm and dry, and she can give birth to his grandchild safely. Esme says she’s not going anywhere with him, but he says, that’s just the pain talking. He wishes she could remember how close they were before she lost her memory. She practically worshipped the ground he walked on. She went to great lengths to get an internship at Spring Ridge. They used to spend hours, planning and dreaming for when he’d be free, and all of them would be together; her, him, and Ava. She says, he’s crazy and delusional. She saw for herself that Ava despises him. He asks when she’s going to learn hate is just the other side of love.
Heather says, it’s not her story to tell; Ryan started it, but Ava has a chance to end it. She hands Ava the gun, and Felicia says, shoot her, but Heather says, shooting her won’t solve Ava’s problem. But Ryan? That’s a totally different story. Felicia says, no one understands being tormented by Ryan better than she does, but don’t make a bad situation worse. Forget Ryan; forget Heather. Let’s just get the hell out of here, and call 9-1-1 for Austin. Ava says, Heather may be psychotic, but she’s right about one thing. Ryan Chamberlain started this, and she’s going to finish it. She stalks out.
Curtis asks how much Marshall knows, and he says, not much, but he’s guessing whatever kept Stella from the wedding wasn’t contagious. Curtis says, that is correct. Portia has been lying to Trina, she’s been lying to Taggert, and she’s been lying to him. She’s been lying since Trina was born, and when he asked her, she lied to his face. She’s been lying since they said I do. Marshall says, the lie being? and Curtis says, Trina may be his daughter.
Spencer asks if Trina is sure this is what she wants, and she says, it is; doesn’t he? He says, of course (🍷) he does, but not like this, and she says, if it’s because it would be her first time… but he says, she just means too much to him to make this anything other than perfect. Just not in an empty art gallery. And she’s hurting right now, and might think if they sleep together the pain will subside, and maybe it would, but it would come back. Then he’d just be the guy who took advantage of her, and for once, he needs her to see him; he needs her to see the good in him, not the bad. She laughs, and says, she’s just not sure she likes him when he’s trying to be noble. He says he’s not sure he does either, but that’s the path he’s choosing. So let him take her home. She says she can’t go back there, and he says, that’s fine, but where should he take her?
Alexis asks if Doc thinks Esme was faking her memory loss this whole time, but he says he doesn’t think so. She may have no idea Heather and Ryan are her parents. Laura says, they got to know Esme when she and Spencer moved in with them. She didn’t like Esme’s sense of entitlement, and she had the elitism of a young woman who studied at a boarding school in France, but she thinks underneath that, was a very wounded little girl. Doc says, it would be just like his brother to use her for his own purposes. Now that Esme’s lost her memory, there’s no telling what he might have told her. She could be an innocent accessory in all this. She is nine months pregnant, after all. Alexis says, unwilling she can buy, but Esme Prince innocent? That’s hard to swallow.
Mac walks into Windymere, and Heather says, it’s good to see him again. She’s glad he’s okay. He hugs Felicia, saying, he’s glad she’s okay, and she says, the same to him. Jordan and Detective Bennett come in, and Felicia says, Ryan is somewhere on the island. Esme ran out, and he went after Esme, and Ava went after him. Mac says, Ava’s asking to be taken hostage, but Felicia says, Ava is armed; Heather gave her a gun. Mac says, what the hell? and an officer calls him over, showing him the hook. Mac tells him, take photos and bag it. Bennett tells Heather that she’s being arrested, and reads her rights. She says she’s heard all this before, but he delivers the Miranda with great panache. He asks if she understands her rights. They wouldn’t want anything she said to be thrown out on a technicality.
Jordan asks Austin what happened to him, and he says she got stabbed… with a hook, so hooked would be more accurate. She asks, who did this? and he says, the nice lady in the handcuffs over there. Heather smiles.
Mac calls for paramedics, and says, there’s been another Hook attack. The victim appears stable, but will need immediate transport. Heather says, if it’s any help, there’s no rush. The hook she used on the good doctor didn’t have any venom in it. Jordan tells Bennett to have the men search the island. Ryan is to be considered very dangerous, and Esme Prince, while technically a fugitive, is nine months pregnant. He says, there’s also a civilian in the mix. Miss Jerome is armed, and she’s been severely traumatized. They don’t want her firing on one of their own. He hands Heather to an officer, and leaves. Mac asks, what happened? and Felicia says, after Heather stabbed Austin, Esme freaked out and ran off, and Ryan ran after her. She wonders what Ryan would want with Esme, and Heather says, didn’t she mention? He’s her daddy.
Ryan tells Esme, be practical. It’s night; it’s February. She can’t give birth out here. She screams for someone to help her, but he says he’s the only help she needs. He’s right here. Ava shows up, and says, get away from her. Now. Or she’ll blow his head off.
Curtis tells Marshall that Stella found out, and that’s why she stayed away from the wedding. She knew. Jordan knew. In fact, the only people who didn’t know this little secret were the people most affected by it. Trina, Taggert… Marshall says, and you, and Curtis says, and me. And if Trina wouldn’t have went and found Stella, he never would have known. That young lady knew something was off. Aunt Stella was just being Aunt Stella. Marshall says he doesn’t believe for a minute that Aunt Stella would deliberately break Curtis’s heart or betray a confidence. Curtis says, nope, but she did hint that there was a problem and it wasn’t her story to tell. And Trina should hear that story from her mama. Marshall asks if that’s why Trina and Portia disappeared from the reception, and Curtis says, damn! How do you keep a secret that’s that important for twenty years? Marshall says he did it too. He did it for forty years. You put the secret in a box, you shove it to the back of the closet, and you forget about it; or at least you try to. Curtis asks if that’s what Marshall did with them. Out of sight out of mind? Marshall says, no, of course (🍷) not. It’s always there. Always. Then sooner or later, that closet door opens, and it all spills out.
Trina says, what about where Spencer’s staying? but he says, no; don’t tempt him. What about her dorm room? but she says, that’s the first place her mom will come looking for her. Besides, Joss is going through her own stuff. He says, what if he gets her a room at the MetroCourt? but she says, her mom and Curtis could still be in their room. He says, they’re kind of running out of options, and she says she just needs a place where she can slam doors, and scream at the top of her lungs without neighbors calling the cops, and then be alone with her thoughts. He says, of course (🍷). He can’t believe he didn’t think of it before. He takes her hand, says he knows just the place where she’ll be safe, and pulls her out the door.
Laura tells Alexis, Jordan and Mac have secured the house, and they have Heather in custody. Alexis says, anyone hurt? and Laura says, there was one final Hook stabbing; Austin Gatlin-Holt. Doc asks, how bad? and Laura says, according to Mac, there was no poison on the hook, so the injuries are not life-threatening. He says, what about Ryan? and she says, still a fugitive. Alexis asks, what about Esme? and Laura promises to get back to her with an update, but right now, she has to get to Spoon Island. Doc says, you mean, we are, and they go to the launch. Alexis makes a call, and says, they have breaking news, and there’s a lot of it. Put on the recorder. The Hook killer has been apprehended. The killer, who after months and months of terrorizing Port Charles, is in police custody. And that’s just the beginning of the story.
Heather says, Ryan Chamberlain is Esme Prince’s biological father, and Felicia asks how she knows. Heather says she must have one of those faces. People trust her with their deepest secrets. Mac asks the paramedics if they can take Felicia to the mainland, but Felicia says she’s going to stay with him. He says he needs to know she’s safe. Ryan is still on the loose. She’s been his obsession for so many years. She says, what if he comes after you? and Mac says, it will save him hunting Ryan down. Tonight, he either goes to Pentenville or maybe hell for that matter. Austin asks if Felicia could come with him. He could use the company. Felicia nods, and hugs Mac, saying, she doesn’t want to make him worry more than he has to. On their way out the door, Austin tells Jordan, please find Ava, and she says, they’ll find her before Ryan does. Heather says, it’s Ryan who should be worried.
Ryan asks how Ava got the gun away from Heather, and she says she has her ways. He says, the first thing she did was look for him. She missed him that much. She says, he’s irresistible, and Esme says, please help her. Her water broke. Ava says, she’s in labor, and Ryan says, they have to get her back to the house where she can have his grandchild safely. Ava says, Esme is his daughter? and he says, yes. This has all worked out even better than he planned. She says, it was him all along, and he says, of course (🍷) it was. How does she think Esme met Spencer? He got her into that snooty French school, where Spencer was walking around with a nice big target on his back. How does she think Esme learned to manipulate Spencer… and his father? He taught her everything she knows. He created her. And this is his crowning moment. Doesn’t she see? Esme has brought them all together. He walks over to Ava, and she says, one more step, and she’ll kill him.
Curtis says, forty years ago, Marshall made a decision, however misguided, to protect the people he loves. That same love inspired him to reunite with his family. What Portia did was only to protect herself. Marshall says he’s not going to let Curtis make him out to be a hero, and Portia to be a villain. He was scared of what he might become without the medication, and truly believes Portia was scared too. What if the truth cost her Trina’s love and respect? What if Curtis refuses to understand? Isn’t the way Curtis walked out on his wedding night proof that Portia had a right to be afraid? Curtis says he can’t excuse this. Some things are really unforgiveable. Curtis drinks another shot.
On the pier, Felicia says she knows Alexis is just trying to get the whole story, but Austin has to get to General Hospital. If she wants to meet them there, do it, but not until after the doctors treat him. Alexis says she understands, and asks if anything is happening at Windymere. Felicia tells her, all she can say is Mac and Jordan have everything under control, and Alexis says, in other words, Ryan Chamberlain is still on the loose. The paramedics start moving the stretcher, and Felicia says she’s sorry, she’s riding with Austin, and they leave.
Alexis sees Spencer and Trina, and tells the officer that they’re with her. Spencer tells her that he was taking Trina over to Windymere, so she could spend the night with Ava. What the hell is happening? Trina asks, what’s with all the police? and Alexis says she assumes they heard about the breakout at Spring Ridge. Spencer says, three prisoners escaped, including Esme. Is Alexis saying Esme is on Spoon Island right now? Alexis says, sadly, she is, and she’s not alone.
On the radio, Mac says, keep him updated. And remember, Ryan Chamberlain is considered very dangerous. He is searching for Esme Prince, who is nine months pregnant. A civilian, Ava Jerome, is unaccounted for. She’s armed. So identify yourself as police, and proceed with extreme caution. Laura says, if Jordan needs any resources, she’ll get them, and Doc says if they need any intel into his brother’s mind or whatever, just ask. Jordan thanks them, and says, this is a very messy situation. She hopes they can end it quickly with as little bloodshed as possible. Doc says he’d think Heather would be keen to help, and Laura asks how he figures that. He says he doesn’t think Heather would want to see any harm come to her daughter or grandchild, and Laura says, Esme is Heather’s daughter, isn’t she? Hers and Ryan’s. Heather says, how could you miss it? She’s got my smile.
Ryan says, once Ava calms down and gets a little perspective, she’ll see that every step he took was worth it. She says, worth it for who? How? He says, so they could be together. Be the family they were always meant to be. Behind him, Esme struggles to get up, and Ava says, he sent his own daughter to seduce Spencer; to convince him to stalk and torture her, and drive her away from Nikolas. Esme limps away into the woods, and Ava says, all the while, making him feel like it was his idea. He says, she convinced herself that she was in love with Nikolas. It required strong measures. She says, so after he got Spencer to destroy her marriage, he sent Esme to seduce her husband, and he says, husbands come and go. The two of them are forever. She says, of course (🍷) he took Kiki. He took her daughter, and then he took Nikolas, and he’ll keep taking until somebody stops him. He says he knows things are complicated, but they have plenty of time to work that out. Right now, Esme’s water broke, and they need to get… He sees Esme is gone, and calls out to her. He runs to the rock, and picks up his coat. Ava asks if he lost something. He says, yes, his daughter, and she asks him to tell her how it feels. How does it feel to lose the one thing you truly love?
Ryan says he’s going to find Esme, and starts walking, but Ava shoots him in his handless arm, and he drops to the ground. He gets to his knees, and says, she shot him. She asks if it hurts. Is he in pain? She can tell him something about real pain, the kind of pain that comes from losing a child, her daughter, her first born. Now his daughter’s gone; she ran from him. Ave starts to cry, and says, she needed Kiki. She needed Nikolas. And they’re both gone because of him. He gets to his feet, clutching his arm, and says, maybe killing Kiki was a mistake, but he didn’t hurt a hair on Nikolas’s stupid thick head. She says she did that. Because of him and Esme. They destroyed her marriage; they poisoned it. There was nothing else she could do. He says, then it was all worth it. She killed him. Now they can be together. There’s nothing that stands between them.
Curtis pushes the bottle away, and Marshall says he knows Curtis is hurting. He has every right, but Marshall hurt him too, and Curtis found it in his heart to forgive him. And because Curtis did, he found the family he’d thought he’d lost forever. In the eyes of God and the State of New York, Curtis has a wife, and he also might have a daughter. Don’t shut himself off from the woman he loves because she committed the unpardonable sin of being human. He puts his hand on Curtis’s shoulder, and tells him, go on and let it hurt, but then he has to let it heal. He’s going to figure this out, and Marshall will be right here for him. He loves Curtis, and he’ll always support him. Tears in his eyes, Curtis thanks Marshall, and they hug.
Trina asks if Spencer is okay. She knows he’s thinking about Esme’s baby. He says he’ll feel a lot better once he knows his little brother or sister isn’t in danger. When Alexis said Esme wasn’t alone, she meant Esme is on the island with crazy Heather Webber and psychopath Ryan Chamberlain, right? Is she a hostage? Alexis says, actually, she’s there with her biological parents.
Laura says, still nothing? but Jordan assures her that they’re doing everything they can, and Mac says, they have the island surrounded. Ryan won’t get away. Doc says, if Esme is Ryan’s daughter, he sees her as a possession; something that belongs to him. It’s like an extension of himself, and they know he’s obsessed with Ava. He’ll do anything to hold her. Laura says she can’t just sit here while Ryan does his worst. They’ve got to do something. Esme stumbles through the door, and collapses in Laura’s arms, sobbing.
Ryan says, with Nikolas out of the way, he and Ava are bound together forever. His life is in her hands, and hers in his. She tells him that he’s crazy, and he says he knows the wounds have to heal – the physical and emotional – but he promises they’ll find Esme, and they’ll take her and the baby, and vanish to someplace no one will ever find them. And he promises her, she’ll thank him. She says, he’s right about one thing. His life is in her hands. He says, til death do us part, and she repeats, til death do us part, taking steady aim. He reaches out, and she slowly… pulls… the trigger.
Tomorrow, Scotty tells Elizabeth that they have unfinished business; Taggert tells Portia that he is Trina’s dad; Esme has her baby; and Ryan says, Ava isn’t done with him yet.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey
Carrying over the somewhat civilized argument Teresa and Melissa were having at the mozzarella party last week, Teresa asked Melissa if she wanted to be a bridesmaid, but Melissa said, not at this point. It would be like going back to an ex-boyfriend.
There was more rehash about the Dolores dynamic having changed for Frank, since Paulie’s got her now. Melissa met with Marge and Jackie for lunch, and said Danielle had complained about Jackie looking her up and down at the mozzarella party. Jackie admitted she had, and said, Danielle looked like a trainwreck, and she couldn’t look away. Her shorts looked like she’d just taken them out of the hamper. She added that Danielle could have been an adult about it, and come to her if she had a gripe, rather than telling Melissa. Pot apparently doesn’t recognize kettle, as it’s not too adult to 1) look someone up and down, and 2) comment to someone else about said trainwreck’s appearance – at their own party, no less. Melissa asked if she wanted to talk to Danielle, but she said, Danielle’s wardrobe was punishment enough. Marge said Jennifer was in a downward spiral, and she was like a festering wound that doesn’t heal. Geez. This bunch is slowly encroaching on Most Awful People territory. However, no one will ever top Jax Taylor for top spot.
It was Rachel’s daughter’s 2nd birthday, and there was a photo session. In Rachel’s interview, she said, everyone thinks they have the cutest kid, but she actually does have the cutest kid. She asked husband John if he wanted another baby, but he wanted to wait a year. In her interview, she said, after they got married, she’d gotten pregnant right away, and had a miscarriage, and never got pregnant again. I guess she did eventually, since they have several kids. She said, it was emotionally and physically draining, and wouldn’t wish it on anybody. It was the most challenging thing in her life. They have five embryos in the freezer, and the time is now. She’s the one who will have to do all the work.
For Teresa, it was all wedding, wedding, wedding, but it wasn’t long before she talked smack about Melissa, bringing Gia and Gabriella (who claims to want nothing to do with the drama, but that’s doubtful) into the conversation. On her podcast, Melissa had claimed she’d been there for the girls when Teresa was in prison, but Gia said, the only time they saw Melissa and Joe #2 was when the cameras were rolling. Louie said Melissa didn’t put one left foot in front of the other, and I wondered if Teresa’s mangling of the English language was catching. Or was Louie born with it and the stars aligned? Louie got all involved in the discussion because he wants more camera time.
In Danielle’s interview, she talked about her kids clothing line, Bougie Kidz, and said, Melissa was living the dream. She met Melissa for I’m not sure what, but it seemed like Melissa was teaching her how to be a stylist. Then, since no one can keep anything to themselves for more than five seconds, Melissa told Danielle about what Jackie had said. In her interview, Danielle said Jackie was a judgy bitch. Danielle said she was concerned about the Teresa/Joe #2 situation because she and her brother had been close, and hadn’t spoken in two years When covid hit, Danielle began filming herself for Instagram, and reviewing products. Her brother constantly made fun of her, so she blocked him, saying, he didn’t have to look. He then cut her out of his wedding, and in her interview, she said she’d thought it was a joke. Obviously not. Melissa felt like she was missing part of the story, and Danielle said some things had happened prior to the wedding. She’d tried not to put in her two cents about the wedding preparations, but she didn’t have a sister, and it was so exciting. She wanted to do things for her future SIL, and was told it wasn’t all about her. She sent a text to her brother, saying, see who she’s dealing with? and he kicked all of them out of the wedding. She thinks it’s the wife behind it, but Melissa said, Danielle’s brother was the one making fun of her. Playing devil’s advocate, she’s tried getting Joe #2 and Teresa together, but unless Joe wants to, she can’t force him. In Melissa’s interview, she said, it’s not always the sister-in-law’s fault. Joe is a grown man, and she can only try so many times.
At Jennifer’s house, there was discussion about teaching the kids more chores, and paying them to do them. In Jennifer’s interview, she said, she and Bill had different approaches to parenting. She told Bill that Marge had said she was sometimes disingenuous, and not self-reflective. She insisted she was the most self-reflective person ever, and Bill rolled his eyes. She asked if he didn’t think so, and he started giving a flowery speech about how people have different personalities. In her interview, Jennifer said she didn’t want to hear it. STFU. Bill said she had to acknowledge her part in things, and in her interview, she said she didn’t need him to validate the other person’s point-of-view. We flashed back to the times Bill was less than supportive.
Danielle said daughter Valentina had been robbed of her school art show because of covid, so she invited her parents over, and there was a private showing. In Danielle’s interview, she said her parents had separated when she was eight, and couldn’t tolerate being in the same room, but they came together when her son Dominic was born. Dominic introduced Valentina, who came out in a rainbow tutu. I’m not sure how old she is, maybe five? As her pieces were brought out, she told her audience what artist inspired them. I took college art courses in high school, and this kid knows more than I do. In her interview, Danielle said, it would kill her if her kids were separated like she and her brother. If her son marries a megabitch, she’ll poison her. Her mother also didn’t talk to her brother, and Danielle mentioned that it was the first time her brother wasn’t there for something with the kids. Her dad started crying, and in her interview, she said, all her dad wants it for the family to be together. This destroyed her whole family. We saw a clip from a home movie when they were kids, and Danielle’s father said, this too shall pass.
Melissa and Joe #2 went to what they call their shore house, but I beg to differ since it’s in Tom’s River. Melissa’s mother and sister came over, and Joe asked if they’d been invited to Teresa’s wedding. They said, no, and in Joe’s interview, he said Juicy Joe’s family had been at his wedding. Melissa’s family had been in their lives for 20 years. Teresa was making a statement that they mean nothing to her. Melissa’s family sat with their parents for 18 years – we see clips of that – and his dad’s last words were, love each other. After New York, he’d called Louie, and said he wanted things to be better. Teresa just had to admit she was wrong. Louie said, she was never going to do that. Louie has done nothing to help the situation, and only made it worse. Joe said, they were going to be having guys night soon, and Melissa’s sister said she could see his Gorga-ness coming out.
The guys met at a bar, and Frank started busting Joe #2’s balls immediately, saying the tables were too high for him. New (Danielle’s) husband Nate was joining the fold, and Frank said, Paulie had to work, then whined about the Dolores dynamic changing. He missed his relationship with Dolores. Joe said, they’d taken Louie in with open arms, and Melissa had treated him like royalty, yet Melissa’s family wasn’t invited to the wedding. Louie walked in just as Joe was saying, he’s garbage.
There was a toast to Louie – for what reason, I don’t know – and Joe #2 asked Louie, how many wedding guests? Louie said, 200, and Joe said he’d met Melissa’s family. Were they were good people? Louie said, they were great people, and Joe asked why they weren’t invited to the wedding. Everyone on his side was f***ed up. Frank asked if there was a reason, and Louie said, past bullsh*t. Joe said, Melissa’s family should be respected because they were close to his and Teresa’s parents. It was like a f*** you. There was some discussion about the hierarchy in Italian families, and Louie said, Joe’s wife was on social media saying Teresa’s kids wouldn’t have eaten if it wasn’t for them. Joe claimed that’s not what she said, and Louie said he was there. Joe said, Louie didn’t know sh*t, and should be embarrassed. Louie said, Joe was on the podcast talking about his sister, and Joe told him, f*** you, saying he wasn’t a man; he was a p*ssy. Louie said, Joe’s talk didn’t affect him, and to stop the theatrics. Joe said he was tired of the bullsh*t, and Louie always backpedals. Louie said, Teresa was his fiancé, and she was 50 years old. What did Joe think he could do? Joe suggested he tell Teresa that she’s out of line, and Louie said he did, but she stood her ground. Joe said he was hurt, and didn’t want to be hurt anymore, and Louie said, Teresa didn’t deserve to be hurt either. She and Joe should talk, and Joe should be vulnerable. What he’s feeling is justified, but they should hear what each other feels. In Joe’s interview, he says, Teresa will just bring up that he didn’t defend Louie. She doesn’t move forward. Louie said that Teresa loved Joe so much, but in his interview, Joe said in his heart, he knows how she feels, and he doesn’t want to waste his time. He told Louie that he’d think about it.
Next time, Bill’s feelings are hurt; Frank Jr. asks Dolores, what’s up with Paulie and his dad; Teresa calls Joe wanting to make peace, but he says he doesn’t know; and Jennifer says she can do what she f***ing wants.
🌊 Slouching Towards the Jersey Shore…
Have your late-night snack here tomorrow, along with some soap and VanderDoings. Until then, stay safe, stay going the extra mile in all you do, and stay not cutting yourself off from loved ones because they committed the unpardonable sin of being human.