What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

One day, I’ll be in my desk chair exactly at 3 pm. So after the opening…

In her office, Kim calls to see if Oscar can get in on an experimental polio treatment that’s been known to work on inoperable tumors. She says her son doesn’t have two months to wait for the next trial. She slams the laptop shut, and cries. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Alexis. Kim asks what she wants. She wants to set the record straight.

Carly tells Josslyn that she voted. The lines are long, and she thinks it’s great that both candidates inspired such a turnout. Josslyn asks if Sonny can do her and Oscar a favor. Carly asks what they need, and Josslyn says they need Sonny’s jet, money, and connections. Me too.

Drew tells Sam that he met Hank, but doesn’t know anything about Shiloh. Sam says she’ll try to explain. Jason was at The Floating Rib, when a guy approached who supposedly mistook him for Drew. Anyone who lives in Port Charles knows that Drew owns Aurora Media and Jason works for Sonny. Hank has been in town long enough to buy a house. She doesn’t think he mistook Jason for Drew. She thinks it’s his way in. Drew asks, for what? She’s hoping he can tell her. He says she doesn’t believe a word Hank said. She tells him that she doesn’t. It’s partly true, but every con has a sliver of truth. She doesn’t believe he is who he says he is. He’s trouble.

Alexis tells Kim that she heard she and Julian broke up, and thinks it’s a mistake. She says, it didn’t happen; they weren’t together on New Year’s Eve. They talked briefly, and she convinced him to go to the hospital. He did, but then came back. They barely had a conversation, but whatever his motives are, they didn’t break up because of her. Maybe Kim should cut him some slack. Kim doesn’t give a damn who Julian slept with, and tells Alexis, get out.

Elizabeth tells Franco, it’s unthinkable. Drew and Kim put all their faith into the trial. They knew it might not work, but were hoping it would at least buy more time. Franco says he texted Drew, letting him know he’s there, but he hasn’t responded. Elizabeth says they have at least a little time with Oscar to make memories, and find a way to say goodbye. It’s not like it came out of nowhere. Elizabeth knows what she went through with Jake, trying to find a way to let him go, but she never lost hope. The ache in her heart never stopped, but she had a miracle. Franco says, maybe Oscar will too, but she says, Jake didn’t die. Helena took him. A disease is claiming Oscar. Franco says, it’s unfair. He can’t believe this is happening. Elizabeth says, she can’t believe so many things happened that did. They have to be in the present moment. She’s grateful he’s there.

Cameron tells Oscar that he thinks it’s the best news he ever heard. Oscar could have texted; he likes good news too. He’s glad it’s over. He needed a positive moment for what’s ahead when he faces the judge. He can say it’s cake compared to Oscar’s trial. The trial worked, right?

Carly asks what Josslyn thinks she can do for Oscar? Josslyn says there’s a clinic in Mexico offering alternative treatment, and they’ve had amazing results. There’s also a drug in England that’s illegal in the US. And Kim talked about a Brazilian doctor. Maybe Sonny could talk to some of his people about drugs unavailable. Carly says she’s done an amazing amount research. What did Oscar’s doctor say? Shouldn’t he finish the trial he’s in? Josslyn says, it’s over and done. It didn’t work, so it’s up to them to save Oscar’s life now.

Carly says she’s sorry, but Josslyn says, it’s okay. They’ll find other options. The internet is full of hope; you just need to know where to look. Carly asks if Josslyn has talked with Kim and Drew. Josslyn means no disrespect, but says, Kim is a doctor, and they don’t have the time to go through regulations. Carly asks if she doesn’t think Kim already looked into alternative methods, but Josslyn says Kim doesn’t know her way around the internet like she does. There are tons of stories about patients like Oscar. Carly asks if clinic ads come with the stories, and if they’re asking for money. Josslyn says, yes, but there are legitimate options for hopeless cases. Carly asks if they survived, and Josslyn says, not all, but a lot. Doesn’t she think it’s worth a try? Josslyn knows in her heart that if she gets him to a place, he can get better, but she needs help. She begs Carly to help her keep Oscar alive.

Cameron says they wouldn’t let Oscar out if he wasn’t okay, right? He’s relieved, and glad for everyone’s sake that it’s over. Things can go back to normal. Oscar says, speaking of normal, why is Cameron dressed like that? Cameron says he has to go to court. Oscar asks if it’s about his shoplifting. Cameron says he wishes. He got busted buying weed. Oscar asks if Cameron smokes, but Cameron says, no. He was trying to buy it.

Drew tells Sam that Hank told him about how Drew saved him in Afghanistan, but he hasn’t had a chance to check further. Sam says he changed his name from Hank to Shiloh after the rescue experience changed his life. Drew says Hank told him, no more hard living. He assumes the name change had something to do with that. She says he runs an organization made up of volunteers, mostly kids who work out of a community called Dawn of Day. He’s also written a self-help book with the same name. She thinks he’s using Kristina to get to her. She married Hank’s father, Henry, under an assumed name, cleaned out his bank account, and disappeared. She needed to help her brother. Drew tells her, it’s okay; she doesn’t have to explain her motives. Sam says she stole from Hank’s dad, so she stole from him. It can’t be an accident. He’s in Kristina’s life; she’s living there. Sam feels like she’s being set up.

Kim ask Alexis why she should be the one to smooth things over. She’s taking a pass. As Alexis said, she has a lot on plate, and doesn’t give a damn about Alexis’s noxious relationship with Julian. Alexis says it’s not about her and Julian; that’s what she’s trying to tell her. Kim says, how noble. Alexis is principled to a fault, except when she’s lying. Whatever is between her and Julian still exists. Kim says she’s tried to ignore it, but it’s still there. If Alexis wants to write another chapter with her ex, have at it, and leave her out of it. Alexis says she’s wrong. She’s just trying help things make sense. Kim says she can’t. Nothing makes sense, and it has nothing to do with her or Julian.

Drew asks if Sam is sure it’s the same place. Sam says Kristina told her Oscar was living there. When Hank was telling Drew how he saved his life, he forgot to mention Drew’s son was living there? Drew says, in all fairness, Hank might not have realized. He was shocked Drew had a kid. Sam asks if he used Oscar’s name, but Drew doesn’t know; he’s distracted. Sam says, it was a long shot. Maybe Drew’s records might have something about saving someone. Drew says, they don’t say much, and more than half is redacted. He’s sorry he can’t help. Sam says she’ll keep him posted. All these coincidences; Hank/Shiloh shows up, and Kristina is struggling. It doesn’t sit well with her. Drew says he’ll call if he hears anything. Sam says she just told him the guy who thanked him for saving his life happens be the son of a man she conned, and he seems to have no reaction. Is something else going on?

Kim tells Alexis, the amino treatment failed; the tumor didn’t shrink. The growth in his brain is entangled in the blood vessels, and there’s no way to remove it. Alexis is so sorry. She asks if Oscar knows, and Kim says they told him last night. He and Josslyn were stoic about it, but she doesn’t know how he’s processing it. She doesn’t know how or what to do. She’s been calling anyone and everyone to find another trial. She’s sent Oscar’s records to any clinic or hospital willing to help. She’s gotten referrals, but they all tell her that they don’t see another outcome. She’s even been looking at quack procedures, knowing they’re a scam. Alexis says she’s fighting any way she can. Kim says she made a mess, not telling Oscar his diagnosis, and forcing him into treatment. Oscar was right to hire Alexis to get away. That’s not the way Alexis sees it. Kim says she dangled hope in front of him, and made him believe he had a future. If she’d let him deal with it his way, he wouldn’t have been cooped up sick and weak. They could have gone skiing for Christmas, instead of spending it at the hospital. She took away precious weeks, and for what? For nothing. Alexis says they knew it might not work, and she’s not the only one who pushed. Drew wanted it, and Alexis did too. She’d hoped Oscar would choose treatment. Maybe he chose it for Josslyn, but he chose hope willingly and freely. Kim says, and it failed him.

Cameron tells Oscar it wasn’t for himself, but a friend. Oscar says, Josslyn? but Cameron says he has other friends. Oscar wonders why he’d do something so risky and stupid. Cameron says maybe it was worth the risk. His friend had no appetite, and needed strength to get out of the hospital. Oscar says Cameron did for him? and calls him an idiot. Cameron says the brownies he was going to make weren’t for the drama club, but he got caught in the middle of the deal. Oscar says, no good deed goes unpunished. Cameron says he was feeling sorry for himself, but Oscar getting better and getting out is a sign everything is going to be okay. Oscar hopes so. Cameron tells him not to forget the journal.

Carly tells Josslyn that she’d do anything for them, but she can’t without his parents’ permission. Josslyn says they’ve already given up. Last night, she could see it in their faces, and hear it in their voices. They’ve given up and think it’s over. Carly says, it sounds like it was about telling the truth. It’s what she and Oscar wanted, right? They’re Oscar’s parents, and can’t offer him another option because maybe one doesn’t exist, but that doesn’t mean they’re giving up. She tells Josslyn to look at how she and Sonny handled Morgan’s bipolar illness. They were discouraged, but even after he was killed, never gave up. They searched for answers until they found them. Josslyn says, this is different, and Carly says, it is and it isn’t. They get to decide what’s best. Maybe what’s best is giving the time Oscar has left meaning. Maybe they want to be a family while they’re still a family. Maybe they don’t want to chase after cures. Josslyn says her point is that if they don’t do anything now, Oscar will die. It’s up to her to be the strong one. Carly says she is, but so is Carly. Let her take some of the burden. She’ll offer Oscar’s parents whatever they need. She’s there for them.

Cameron read the journal; another alt dance without an earthquake. He sees water skiing, and asks if Oscar knows how. Oscar says, no, and he doesn’t know how to surf or paddleboard either. Cameron says Josslyn is really into him; Oscar’s a lucky guy. He tells Oscar, don’t forget it, and Oscar says he won’t, and he knows he’s lucky. Cameron asks him not to tell Josslyn about the weed. He doesn’t want her to know how crazy he got. He says his mom is blowing up his phone, and he can’t be late. Wish him luck. Josslyn comes in, and says Cameron looks like one of Sonny’s guards. What’s the occasion? He tells her that his mom is having a victory party when Laura wins the election. He leaves, and Josslyn says Oscar didn’t tell him. She asks how he’s feeling, and Oscar says, better, now that she’s there. She hugs him and asks, where else would she be?

Kim tells Alexis that she’s a woman of science, but she’s had countless conversations with God. Prayer, condemnation, pleas, demands; she’s made them all. She doesn’t know if they were heard or felt, but she doesn’t count anything out. She’s seen miracles happen. Miracles with babies who beat the odds, and with mothers who can’t conceive, yet carried healthy babies to term. She’s preached positivity to patients. Alexis asks if she’s preached it to herself, and Kim says, especially herself. If she believes strongly enough, she’ll get a miracle. Her boy will grow up a happy, healthy young man, with a long life. The thing about miracles is, they’re unpredictable. Alexis says she’s truly sorry this is happening. Oscar is a great kid, and she wants him to be around a long time. She’s there for Kim, no matter what. They hug, and when Alexis is gone, Kim cries.

Sam tells Drew that she’s sorry. She assumes what’s going on is none of her business. He says he wants her to know – but Carly interrupts. She says Josslyn is upset, and she was hoping she and Drew could talk. Drew asks Sam to stay; she needs to know this. They’ve wasted so much time keeping secrets, so he’ll get to the point. The treatment failed. Oscar is terminal.

Alexis arrives at court. She explains she’s going to ask for an adjournment; a contemplation of dismissal. If Cameron stays out of trouble for six months to a year, the charges will be dropped. They need to ensure that, although misguided, Cameron was making a sincere attempt to help a friend, and they don’t want it to derail his future. Cameron runs in, saying, let’s do this. Elizabeth says, this morning, Cameron was scared to death. He says he was just with Oscar, and if Oscar can stand up to cancer, he can stand up to a judge. At least he knows Oscar is going to be okay.

Sam tells Drew that she’s so sorry. Drew says Terry was clear; nothing can be done. Not medically anyway. It’s ironic. Yesterday, Oscar was having a great day. He had energy and an appetite, and was making plans for the future. He looks healthy and perfectly normal. He guesses it’s a blessing that the rest of Oscar’s life won’t be spent in a hospital bed. Carly asks, how much time? and Drew says, a few weeks, a few months; less than a year. He tells Carly that she should be proud. Her daughter is supportive and mature. He doesn’t think the news has sunk in with Oscar. He seemed stunned. Carly  says one reason she’s there, is she promised Josslyn that she’d offer Sonny’s jet to them if they want to take Oscar out of the country for treatment.

Josslyn tells Oscar, one good thing is that he’s getting out. Oscar wants to do what they’d planned, and Josslyn asks if he’s sure he’s up for it. He says, no, but the weird part is, he feels great. After all the weeks of not knowing, he knows he’s dying – but not today. Today he’s with her and feels alive. Josslyn says, her too. She spent last night worrying about what comes next, but today, she’s not worrying. It’s a waste of time, so she’s going to spend every second with him. They kiss. She asks if he’s sure he can handle an entire Kelly’s cheeseburger after weeks of hospital food. He tells her that he wants fries too. They leave, and the journal gets left behind.

Carly tells Drew that Josslyn was up all night on the internet. Drew says he was doing the same thing until 3 am, when he realized it was just another form of denial. Sam says Oscar might think differently. If anyone can get him to change his mind, it’s Josslyn. Drew says if Oscar wants explore other options, he’ll do whatever Oscar wants, but it’s his choice. It’s his time that’s running out, so he gets to decide how he lives the rest of his life. Carly says she’ll talk to Josslyn if necessary, but she thinks Josslyn will get there on her own. Her first instinct is to fight. Drew wonders where she gets that from. Carly says, Josslyn is wise enough to know it’s not the quantity of time, but what you do with the time left.

On the phone, Kim says, see you later tonight. For a moment, we think she might be talking to Julian, but she says, have fun with Josslyn, and be careful. She loves him. She sits on Oscar’s hospital bed, and sees the journal. She looks through it

Elizabeth tells Cameron, remember to speak clearly and respectfully, take responsibility for his actions, and show remorse. Cameron says he absolutely will. He should have gone with his first instinct, canceled the deal, and never shown up. He wishes he could get a do-over. Alexis says he might be able to; it’s what she’s going for. In the meantime, listen and be the contrite, upstanding young man who knows he made a mistake. Franco wonders if Cameron should explain why, but Alexis says, it depends on who the judge is. If it’s Judge Carson, it could be a problem. She’s a real hardnose. The bailiff says, all rise. Naomi Carson presiding. They all look at each other, while Cameron stares straight ahead.

Tomorrow, Ned says it’s out of his hands, Judge Carson reaches a decision, Laura tells Sonny that she has nothing to hide, and Margaux tells Lulu something off the record.

The Haves and the Have Nots

When we last left, Veronica had fallen over the railing at David’s house, and Benny was shot on the front stoop where Hanna is living.

Hanna tells Benny, hang on; they’re coming. She can still smell the baby’s breath from when he was little. She tells God, no. We hear sirens, and she says, they’re closer. He’s going to be all right, in the name of Jesus.

Veronica lies among the packing boxes. Madison tells Jeffrey to call an ambulance, but he’s not in any hurry. Veronica tells Madison to get his homosexual hands off of her, but he says he’s trying to help her. He asks Jeffrey what the address is. Veronica says Jeffrey did this. Madison tells her to relax and stop moving. Jeffrey says if she doesn’t want his help, don’t touch her. Madison says, she could die, but Jeffrey says, she’s like a cockroach. You can’t kill her. He goes back upstairs.

The nurse tells Hanna, relax, or at least try. Derrick arrives, and asks, what happened? She says she doesn’t know who shot him, but knows who does. Derrick asks if Benny is all right, but she doesn’t know. He stopped breathing on the porch and in the ambulance. They say he lost a lot of blood. Derrick says, it will be all right; she’ll be all right. She says she didn’t hear gunshots, and asks, what would make someone do that? Mitch shows up, and says he’s sorry. Hanna wonders why he called her, and he stumbles over his words. He says he knew someone was after Benny – it was his family. Hanna says, it was because of the damn money. Mitch says, and his uncle getting shot. She says Benny didn’t do that, and Mitch says he told them. He’ll talk to his grandmother and she’ll straighten it out. Hanna can’t do this right now. She doesn’t want him here. He says he was trying to stop it, but she doesn’t want to hear it. He’s so sorry. Benny is his friend, and he wants to know he’s okay. Hanna wonders how she knows he’s telling the truth, and not just here to get information. He says she knows him; he’d never do that. Derrick suggests giving him the number and he’ll call. Mitch begs to stay for Benny. Derrick thinks he should leave, but Mitch says it’s a public hospital, and he just wants to know what happened. He sits near the wall.

Madison asks if Jeffrey is sure he doesn’t want to go to the hospital. He doesn’t. Madison doesn’t know how she treats him. Madison tells Jeffrey that he can’t let her make him bitter. He gets the psychology, and is just trying to help. Jeffrey says he didn’t mean to snap. He just gets crazy thinking about her. Madison thinks Jeffrey should take his mind off of it, and they decide to go out to eat. Madison suggests seeing his mom afterward, but Jeffrey tells him not to push his luck.

At the hotel, Candace sits on the bathroom floor, crying. Charles wakes up, and calls to her. She says she’ll be out in a moment. He joins her, and tells her to let it out. He holds her as she cries over her son. He’s dead, and she’s the reason. He didn’t have a chance. She brought him to this town. Charles tells her, it’s okay, but she says, it’s too much. He says she has to let it out. She suddenly pulls herself together, and says, okay. She goes into the other room, and gets her bag. He asks what the shift was. One minute she’s breaking down; the next, she’s leaving. She’s not doing this. She’s not crying and blaming herself anymore. Candace says she has to get out of this place. He wants her to come with him. She says she’s in no shape, but he says she is. She’s like him; the weight of the world is on her shoulders, and she can’t hold it together. She’s human. She says, this human is leaving, but he doesn’t want her to go. How many ways does he have to say it? He wants her to come with him. She says, to the White House? Isn’t that for the President Elect and future First Lady? There must be protocol. He thinks they can rewrite some protocol. Her phone rings. Charles says, whoever it is can wait, but she answers. It’s Mitch. He tells her, Benny has been shot; he’s in the hospital. She says she’s on her way. She tells Charles her brother has been shot. Charles asks if he’s okay, but she doesn’t know. He says he’s coming with her. She says he can’t, and he says he is. He calls Landon. Landon runs in with the Secret Service guys, and Charles tells them they’re going to the hospital. Landon asks what to tell the press, but Charles doesn’t care. They have to move.

FBI Dude asks Dr. Rothschild how Veronica is. The doctor says they need a warrant for that information. FBI Dude goes into Veronica’s room. She says she was just in a terrible fall, and can’t talk. He says they know, and she says, of course; they were following her. She tells him that she fell off a ladder, and he says, it’s not that simple. She yells that she’s in pain. FBI Dude says the doctor claimed she had no broken bones. Veronica says it’s illegal to tell him medical information, and FBI Dude says the doctor didn’t tell him; she just did. He looks at her chart, and says she just has tight muscles. She says he shouldn’t be reading her chart, but he says she’s under federal investigation with the FBI and Homeland Security. She no longer enjoys the privileges of being a public citizen after the car bomb. She tells him that he needs to brush up on the law. She’s a damn good lawyer. He says, locally, and she tells him take his best shot. He says he’ll be throwing his best bomb, and she tells him, get busy. He asks if she’s not cooperating, and she wonders if his ignorant, sweaty ass is hard of hearing. She asks how long he’s been on coke. She knows he needs it. She runs a rehab, and can see an addict a mile away. She’ll tear his ass up on the stand. She tells him that he’d better go get his fix. He’s leaving a puddle on her floor. The FBI guys leave. In the hallway FBI Dude tells Silent Guy, he’s nailing her ass to the wall. Put pressure on everyone in her circle until someone breaks.

Kathryn tells Roderick, don’t make her have to come in there, as he dawdles in the bathroom, finally coming out in his skivvies. She wonders if he thought she’d let him get away with the whole ring thing. She wants it shut down now. He asks what if he refuses? and she asks if he was born there. He says, in Brooklyn, and she says, that’s a lie. He was born in Guadalajara. His passport is fake, and his social security number is fake. He asks how she knows, and she says, that’s the question he should be asking himself. He asks how long she’s known, and she says, since he first flashed his sexy Latin eyes at her. He asks if she’s having him deported, but she says, no. She’ll have him whenever she wants to. She tells him not to be shy. She wants that girl – Candace Young. She wants everything he has on the ring, and Candace’s ass in jail. She doesn’t want to hear one kind word about that whore. She asks what Roderick has on her, and he says, a bartender is upset with her. He knows things. Kathryn asks his name, and Roderick says, Rocky. She asks if he’s there today, and tells Roderick to call and have him come up. Roderick starts getting dressed, but she tells him, no. Get him on the phone now.

The phone at the bar rings. Roderick tells Rocky to come up to the room. Kathryn wants champagne. Roderick tells him to bring it; just come.

Landon speaks to the chief of staff at the hospital, asking about Benny. He also needs the names of sick children and their families. The President Elect is visiting, and the hospital is going to look good on the news.

Wyatt calls the guards over. We find out their names are Leo and Max. Wyatt asks Leo how much his father is paying to keep an eye on him. Leo says that’s between him and Wyatt’s father, but sometimes it’s not enough. Wyatt says it can’t be too much. There’s a knock at the door. Max gets it, and it’s Sarah looking for Jim. Wyatt says, she’s the one. She says she needs to talk to Jim, and he’s not answering his phone. Wyatt doesn’t think he’ll be gone long, and tells her sit, saying Max and Leo are his shadows. He offers her a drink, but Leo says, there’s no alcohol in the house. Sarah just wants water, and they all go to the kitchen.

Wyatt asks, what happened? and Sarah repeats she needs to talk to Jim. He asks if she’s into his father. She says, no, and he asks if she’s sleeping with him. She says, no, and he says she’d be the first. She wants to leave, but he tells her to stay. He’ll call a friend, and see if he can find out where Jim is. He says he’s going to the bathroom, and asks if Leo wants to shake it for him. Leo says, no sir, but still follows.

Rocky comes to Kathryn’s room. Roderick lets him in. Roderick asks if she’s Kathryn Cryer, and Kathryn says, wrong. She’s the woman who has him by the balls. She tells him, he’s a bartender, and that’s champagne, and he pours it. He asks Roderick, what’s going on? Kathryn says, cut the crap. She knows about the prostitution ring. Rocky acts ignorant, and she says just give her the damn champagne. She tells Roderick to tell Rocky what else she knows. Roderick says she has him the way she has Rocky. Kathryn says she’ll have him arrested. Rocky says it wasn’t his idea, and Roderick says, she knows. Rocky says he was just supposed to look out for Candace. Kathryn says she heard he took a beating, and asks if he wants to get even. Rocky says Candace will go to the police, and he’ll get in trouble, but Kathryn says, not if he blames her. She can’t believe he has loyalty to that whore. Rocky says he doesn’t want to get in trouble, and Kathryn says if he doesn’t do it, she will. She asks how long he’s been in the states, and he says he’s legal. She says she has friends in the State Department who might say different. Rocky says, all right; he’ll do it. There’s no need to threaten him. She asks if he’s involved, but he says, no. She looks him over, and tells him to stand up. She’s horny. Roderick says, just do what she says, and Kathryn tells him to take his clothes off. Rocky says, no way. Kathryn says she hasn’t had a threesome in a long time, and it’s going to be fun. Roderick pats Rocky on the back, and gets into bed. Yuk. With those two?

David gets a vest to help his wounds heal. He tells the intern, it hurts like hell, but she tells him that he can take medication. He doesn’t have to be a hero. She cautions him against infection, and says he’s doing really well. He says, it doesn’t feel like it, but she thinks he is, and so does the doctor. He’s healing fast. David says he wants out, but she says they’ll see.

Jim visits David. He tells David that he had a hard time getting up to the room. The hospital has a special guest; the President Elect. David says, Charles? Jim says David acts like he knows him, and David says he does. The intern tries to interrupt, but Jim hustles her out. David asks, what’s going on? and Jim says he has an informant at the DA’s office; some bimbo who got caught. She gave him evidence. David is like, damn, and Jim says she came to the house wearing a wire. That’s why he didn’t want to say anything on the phone. David asks if Jim said anything incriminating. Jim says, no, but if she tells everything she knows… He’s not sure he can control this woman. David asks what Jim has on her. Jim says, just her past, but he’s sure the DA already knows about it. David says, not good, and Jim says, ya think? They have to come up with something else. Jim tells David about Kathryn’s rendezvous, and David asks, what’s going on with these women and young men? Veronica is with a boy Jeffrey’s age. Jim says, they’ve lost their minds, and asks, how old was Erica? David says, that was different, and Jim says, he forgot; they’re different. David asks how old Candace is. Jim thinks 114, and I laugh. Jim pats David on the back, and David cringes. Jim asks if that hurt.

At the hospital, a Secret Service guy says Hanna can stay. He asks if she knows Derrick and Mitch. She says she does, and he says, they can stay. He pats Derrick down. Mitch wonders how they know his name, and the guy says, this is a matter of national security, and pats him down. Derrick asks Hanna, what’s going on? but she doesn’t know. Mitch asks again how they knew their names. Candace comes in with Charles, and Hanna says, oh my God.

Next time, Hanna thinks it will be an interesting four years, Justin asks where Jeffrey has been, Wyatt asks Sarah for a favor, and Jim punches Roderick. Like he cares. This season looks promising. The main takeaway points I got from the preview were, Jim is taking everybody down, and God hears Hanna.

💔 At last! If Loving You is Wrong returns on Wednesday, February 27^th at 10 pm. I’d almost given up.

Below Deck

When we last left, Laura was telling Kate she needed to check herself.

We rewind a little. Kate leads Laura away from the guests and down the stairs. Laura says Kate needs to seriously figure her sh*t out, and have some appreciation. There are other ways to approach her. She didn’t have to go through the cabins at the end of her shift. She needs to check herself. In her interview, Kate says rule number one is, don’t scream at your boss in front of the guests, and rule number two, don’t scream at your boss period. And rule number three, check your own self. Kate goes to see Captain Lee, telling him they have an issue. Laura had a temper tantrum, and screamed at her within earshot of the charter guests. The problem started when she asked Laura to do turndowns, and saw towels on the floor. She’d like the captain to give her a gentle reminder of the boat hierarchy, fire her, or Kate can quit. There are three options. In his interview, the captain says he can’t just pull stews off fig trees. He tells Kate that he doesn’t think a chat tonight will do any good, so he’ll talk to her in the morning. Laura will have to get it together.

Kate tells Josiah about what happened. He thinks they should fire Laura, since the two of them can do two jobs. Adrian and Ashton laugh about checking yourself. Helen declares dinner a palate aphrodisiac. Josiah loves it. He thinks Helen is in love with  Adrian.

Tyler tells Rhylee that emotions are out there. Laura was screaming and yelling at Kate. Ashton asks if Laura feels better. She is, but doesn’t want them laughing at her expense. In Laura’s interview, she says she’s felt walked on and humiliated. Sorry not sorry. Omg, the dessert would be worth being screamed at. It involves dark chocolate, almonds, and sponge cake. Helen wants Adrian to watch them bite into it. In his interview, Josiah suggests the just get a room already. Helen requests that Adrian witness the first bite, and pronounces it outstanding. Adrian relays the scene to Ashton, who thinks Helen is completely thirsty. The guests go to bed. For alleged mafioso, they’re not very exciting.

Laura asks Rhylee to check the dryer in a half hour, since she wants to go to bed. Rhylee tells Laura about Tyler. Laura tells her about Kate showing her what’s wrong with her turndown. She says Kate is the fakest, most horrible woman she’s ever met, and she can’t appreciate her workers. Rhylee says there’s only two weeks left, and Kate can run Laura ragged. She needs to rise above it. In Rhylee’s interview, she says she’s kind of proud of Laura. Kate says she doesn’t love sass, or a stew who can’t do their job. A combo of the two is the worst.

Lots of bacon in the morning, and beautiful scenery. Laura asks Kate where the bread plates are, and Kate ignores her, going slowly up the stairs in front of Laura, who’s carrying something heavy. <snort!> Kate points out where the plates are, saying they’ve been there the whole time. Captain Lee calls for Laura to come to the wheelhouse. He understands they had an issue last night. He tells her all she needs to do is her job, and no confrontation with the chief stew in front of the guests. He doesn’t care who started it. Laura says she was upset about something, and it came out in a less than eloquent way. She agrees with everything he said, and he says he wants nothing less. She leaves with a smile, and in the captain’s interview, he says Laura let her mouth write a check her ass couldn’t cash. She has to suck it up, and do the right thing.

Ross instructs the deckhands about what to get ready. In her interview, Rhylee says, it’s frustrating. She’s never on anchor. She keeps bringing it up, but she’s usually shut down. We flash back to Ross telling her to lose the attitude. On deck, Ross thinks there’s rain in distance. Laura tells Ashton that she’s taking so much sh*t. She complains a lot, but no one seems super sympathetic. Probably because it’s your job, dude. Breakfast is served. In Kate’s interview, she says all she can tell about the guests, are that two are mafia, and they’re not too high maintenance. Helen would never tell Richard to check himself.

Anchor is up, and they move out. In his interview, Ross says Tyler catches on fast, and Rhylee is in a great mood, so it’s a breath of fresh air. Wairoa Cove, where the guests are staying the night, is indescribably beautiful and blue. In her interview, Rhylee is tired of being overlooked, and wonders at what point it ends. Richard asks the captain to join them for dinner. Kate says she’s giving Laura a checklist. She doesn’t care if Laura is lying about her experience, but cares if the guests have towels and toilet paper.

Helen is getting heart palpitations from the height of the slide. It is pretty high up. Tyler says he’s big on active guests, and these guests are super lame. In Ross’s interview, he thinks Rhylee wants to prove something. She’s hauling some equipment around the beach club, and he tells her to let him know when she needs help; she’s doing too much. She wonders why he’d say that, and he says he can see it. Let me insert my opinion of their problem here. She is huffing and puffing, and no doubt this stuff is heavy. He sees this, and thinks he’s being a good guy by telling her that he’s there if she needs help. She takes it as him thinking she can’t handle the simple, menial tasks she’s being given, and maybe that’s why he’s not giving her something more important. They’re looking at it from two totally different perspectives, but because they’re not communicating that, this is what happens – she says, she’s got it. He’s like, cool, but if you need help… She says again, she’s got it, but he doesn’t like her tone. If he wants to handle the sh*t, do it. Or let her effing do it, but quit asking her. He wonders what the hell is going on? He can’t keep up. She says she’s told him five times, and he keeps asking her the same questions. He tells her, got it, isn’t a response. Josiah walks in, and immediately realizes he doesn’t want to be there. In Rhylee’s interview, she says Ross doesn’t listen. Ross thinks she doesn’t listen, and tells her that he can talk to someone else, who will listen. In his interview, Ross says he’s over it. Rhylee has had seven charters to learn her place and trust him. She’s got to go. Guest Linda snoozes on deck, clutching a glass of rosé.

Tyler feels like he’s out of the loop. Laura says she does too. In his interview, Tyler says he loves watching people lose their sh*t. It’s the best entertainment, as long as he’s not in the middle.

Ross says if Rhylee won’t listen to reason, he needs to find someone who will listen. In his interview, Ashton says one day, Rhylee is happy, and the next, she’s miserable. It’s so annoying. Laura asks if Rhylee is okay, and Rhylee says she’s good right now. Kate radios Laura to the check the cabins for toilet paper and towels. Laura says Kate is trying to screw with her on purpose. Tyler just keeps eating, and doesn’t say a word.

Lunch is duck confit. I have no idea what that is, but even though I’m not a fan of duck, it looks delicious. Helen says she’ll see Adrian in kitchen at six. In his interview, Adrian says she obviously has a crush on him, and she’s married to Tony Soprano. So awkward.

The captain says the weather is going south quickly. He wants everything nailed down, and doesn’t want to lose any covers. The deck crew brings everything in. Tyler ropes a flamingo floatie. Laura asks Adrian if they still have to dance, and he tells her to get her ancient dance routine together. Rhylee is over it. Even Tyler, with no experience, is above her. Not one of them has treated her with any respect.

Adrian asks if there can be dinner without drama, and Kate says there can be. She tells him, sometimes it’s better to go to the captain right away. Laura was acting big and bad with her, but not saying the same things to the captain. She holds up a couple of palm fronds, and says she’s found Ashton’s costume. He asks, why not pick on the new guy? Helen puts her heels on for the kitchen. He’s preparing some kind of cauliflower dish, and she watches him cook, asking an occasional question. Ashton peeks in, and asks if Adrian has a new sous chef. In Adrian’s interview, he says Helen reminds him of his first girlfriend, but he’s worried husband will put him in a body of water. Helen helps do some of the cooking. She says, the anticipation of what’s to come is almost as good as the experience. Ashton, Laura, and Tyler practice their dance routine.

Rhylee tells Kate that Ross is threatening to get rid of her, but Kate says she’s not going anywhere. She’s good at her job, but isn’t getting the respect she deserves. Kate tells her to let them worry and stress. In her interview, Kate says she doesn’t think Ross is serious about getting rid of Rhylee. At least Rhylee is serious about her work. She tells Rhylee to be the bigger person, and don’t get sassy. Rhylee radios Ross, asking him to meet her in the beach club. When he arrives, she tells him that she enjoys working with him, but feels like she misses out on the big things. She wants more respect. She needs to feel like she’s doing more. Ross says what she’s doing is important. There are things he can’t trust Tyler with because he has no experience. And he doesn’t like that she doesn’t respect him. Rhylee says she feels like she’s underneath everyone, doing menial jobs. In Ross’s interview, he says if she’d stop questioning him, she’d realize what he’s asking her to do is important. He tells her that he’s letting this conversation go. He doesn’t want her to leave, but she can’t just argue and disagree with him.

Kate gives Laura her list, and tells her, checklist yourself. Laura laughs, and in her interview, admits her turndowns weren’t the best, but Kate needed to let her know how she does things. In her interview, Rhylee says she has a temper. She gets it from her father. It’s hard to admit, but obviously she’s the issue.

Dinner is served. The main components being seared tuna and snow peas. Mmm… Helen says, it’s like eating a painting. Captain Lee says Adrian has mad skills. Tyler is stoked for dancing while half-naked. Ashton thinks they look brilliant. Kate says Laura is doing a great job, now that she has a checklist. She announces to the guests that local performers are there to finish off their meal. Aston reads from his ancient Tahitian ancestral storybook, that’s been passed down for generations, and narrates as the others dance. Everyone applauds. Helen says they have quite the crew. The captain bids them goodnight.

Laura tells Ashton that she’s exhausted. At least she and Kate are being nice again. She’s excited for tomorrow, and Ashton asks if she’s sleeping in the crow’s nest again. In Laura’s interview, she says Ashton has a good heart. She doesn’t know him well, but what she knows, she likes.

Anchor is pulled, and the guests get ready for departure. Rhylee and Ross hug it out. In his interview, Ross hopes he got through to her, so they can end the season on a good note. Rhylee wants to explore on land. In her interview, she says she’s been herself more with Tyler. Maybe because they had sex right away. The boat docks, and Captain Lee asks for the crew in their whites, asap. The tip is presented, and co-primary Craig says they’re fabulous. The captain tells the crew to be in the crew mess in five.

Captain Lee tells them that he loved the skit, but he’s concerned they’re starting to lose focus. It’s not a democracy. They don’t get a vote. He’s not asking them to love everyone, but if everyone is doing their job, no one should have complaints. There’s no reason they can’t pull together for a strong finish. The tip is $20K, which, by my calculation, is almost three grand each. Some of the crew take power naps; then everyone gets ready to go out. Adrian tells Laura that Ashton is a creeper. She says she’s not the kind of girl who’s another notch in a belt.

Ashton puts his arm around Laura in the taxi. She hopes he proves Adrian wrong. They go to a restaurant/club that has a DJ. Major drinking happens. Tyler dances with Rhylee. Ashton looks around, beginning his creep dance. Josiah thinks Tyler and Rhylee are perfect. Laura blows off Ashton. He’s confused, saying they were on a good vibe, but now she’s cold. It’s not stopping him from having a good time though. In Tyler’s interview, he says he’s 200% when he goes out. He wants good stories for when he sits in the rocker. He starts getting down and dirty with a stranger. In Rhylee’s interview, she says she and Tyler aren’t in a relationship, so she can’t hold him to any standards. Josiah tells Laura to show Ashton what he’s missing, but she says Ashton can go have fun. Ashton tries get close to Laura, and sits on her purse. She says he’s rude. The crew gets ready to leave.

The cheese Ashton sits alone in the taxi back. Tyler falls out on Rhylee’s lap. When they get back to the boat, Ashton asks Laura to chat. She asks if he’s drunk. Rhylee and Tyler get in the same bunk. In her interview, Rhylee says this doesn’t mean she forgives Tyler, she’s just in the mood for sex. We see yet another stray dog on the dock. Ashton asks Laura what’s upset her. She says she’s not upset but… nothing. In Laura’s interview, she says she thought Ashton respected her, and they’d established a connection. He asks, what changed? She says she didn’t see him all night, and he danced with other girls. That’s fine, but she’s not going to be a tally on a checklist. Ashton says he didn’t hook up. She was his priority. Yeah. I can’t figure that out either. Laura says, it’s all good, but he made his bed, so go sleep in it. Adrian said he was a player. Since he’s totally distracted, Laura says, if he’s not listening, she’s walking away. Ashton says, cool; let’s end it. She says he’s wasted, so there’s no point.

Next time, an all gold party, Rhylee and Tyler do it five times, Kate says the guests are extra extra, and a guest falls off a jet ski.

🚤 More Amalfi…