Tag Archives: Brooke Anne Smith

July 25, 2023 – Brook Makes a Bet With Chase, Final Molly, NJ Share, VanderClose, Shady But Smart, Odd Pets (!) & Night

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Chase brings Brook out to the pool, and she asks what they’re doing here. He says, there’s nowhere to dance in the restaurant, and he wants to dance with her. He spins her around, sings to her, and they dance. He dips her, and looking up, says, they can’t be here. They’ve got to go.

Portia goes into Curtis’s room, and says, hello, you handsome man. She could have sworn she told him to stay off the cellphone. He says he found a new website; this one from Harvard. He thinks he might be on to something. She tells him, please stop, and takes the phone out of his hand. He asks what she’s doing, and she says, saving him from himself.

Finn’s table is ready, and he and Elizabeth are seated. He tells her that she looks stunning, and she thanks him. She says, it seems busy here tonight. It’s a beautiful night; everyone wants to be outside. He says he can ask if they can have a table outside, but she says, no. She didn’t mean… She’s good. They’re fine in here. She doesn’t know why she’s nervous. It’s not like they haven’t had dinner before. He says, if it makes her feel any better, he’s nervous too. Don’t tell him that they’re finally on the same page. She says, it’s a really nice way to start over again; to be on the same page.

Dex tries to rouse Gordon, and says, hey! He kicks Gordon’s leg, but there’s no response. He takes out his phone.

Ava says, Sonny’s not interrupting. She’d like him to meet Betty. She’s the potential nanny for Avery. Betty shakes his hand, and says, what a pleasure to meet him. He says, it’s good to meet her. There’s nothing more important than his daughter. She says, of course (🍷), and his phone rings. He sees it’s Dex, and asks them to excuse him for a second. He leaves, and Betty tells Ava, remember their deal. She either sells Betty to Avery’s dad that she’s the perfect nanny, or someone she loves dearly will pay the price.

In the foyer, Sonny says he’s in the middle of something. This better be important. Dex says, unfortunately it is, and Sonny asks, what’s going on? Dex says, they have a problem.

Betty says, as a reminder, she’s going to need full access to Sonny’s penthouse. She’s done her part and provided Ava with a flawless résumé. She even has references to vouch for Betty’s her work as a nanny. Ava just needs to convince Sonny that she’s the ideal candidate to take care of Avery. Because if Ava doesn’t sell her, that phone call to Delia will be the last time Ava ever hears her mom’s voice again.

Sonny says he hopes Dex is clear on how he’s going to handle this… Great. Call him with an update. Sonny goes back into the living room, and says, sorry about that. Now where were they? Betty says, he doesn’t have to apologize. She’s so appreciative of the opportunity to be interviewed by him. From everything Ava tells her, becoming Avery’s nanny sounds like the perfect fit for her. Don’t worry. She’s worked with non-married parents before. She’s used to making sure both mom and dad are always happy with her work. Sonny says he’d love to hear what they’ve already discussed about Avery and her needs, and Ava says, anything. It’s really one of the most memorable interviews she’s conducted. Sonny smiles.

The waiter asks if he can start Finn and Elizabeth off with cocktails. Perhaps a bottle of wine? Elizabeth says, a bottle won’t be necessary, but she’d love a glass of cabernet, and Finn says he’ll have the sparkling water. The waiter leaves, and Finn thanks Elizabeth for ordering what she wanted. Sometimes it’s awkward for a non-addict to be out with a recovering addict. They feel like they have to abstain. Like somehow ordering a glass of wine will be a temptation for him. He appreciates her not treating him that way, and also doesn’t want to spend the evening talking about him not drinking, which is exactly what he’s doing, isn’t it? She says, how about if tonight is just about them spending time together? She thinks that’s the point of what they’re trying to do. She’s missed spending time with him. He says he’s missed her.

Portia says, all the websites Curtis is trying to get information on, he doesn’t know if the information is true or not, and he says he didn’t want to just sit here helpless, wondering what comes next. She says, medical website after medical website. She thought he’d at least be checking the baseball game scores or something. It’s not healthy. He says, baseball scores don’t seem all that important at this point, and she says, he’s been glued to this phone almost 24 hours straight, and she knows it’s probably making him a little bit crazy. He says, what’s making him crazy is taking test after test for the last 24 hours, and not getting any news on the results, good or bad. Not a damn thing. He can’t move his legs, and yes, he’s finding the internet a little more helpful than his doctors. She says, his doctors don’t want to give him a premature diagnosis, and he says, some information is better than none. She says, but the information he’s getting online… Isn’t it better to talk a doctor with an actual medical degree? He says he feels like he’s being handled. Does she think that’s helping him? She says she understands what he’s saying. She doesn’t know how he feels, but she can imagine he’s feeling like his life is out of control. She knows him, and knows that has to be hard for him, but going on the internet and looking at these websites… Can’t he see that he’s torturing himself? He says, it’s his phone. It’s his injury. It’s his choice. He wants his phone back. She says she’ll give him his phone back under one condition.

Chase and Brook look at the Pool Area Closed sign, and Brook wonders why they closed the pool on such a beautiful night. He says he doesn’t know. He guesses he could go inside and see if there are any tables available. She says, or they could stay out here and pretend they didn’t see the sign, but he says he’s a police officer. She says, who’s off-duty, but he says he’s still a cop. It’s literally his job to enforce the rules. She says, yes, but she’s a Quartermaine, and they break the rules. Besides, her Uncle Sonny’s fiancé owns half the MetroCourt, and the other half is owned by her dad’s wife… even though her dad doesn’t currently know who he is or won’t admit it. He asks, how is the Eddie Maine situation? and she says, whether her dad knows who he is or not is not going to be solved tonight. Tonight is just about them. So in light of her special standing with the MetroCourt owners, will he please just break the rules with her just this once?

Ava tells Sonny that Betty has a degree in Early Childhood Development, and her references are excellent. And like Betty said, she has experience in working with kids who split their time within parents, so she understands the rules might be a little bit different in each home. He says, sounds good, and Ava says, Betty’s warm and friendly, and she’s confident Betty would be a very good fit for Avery. Sonny asks if Ava talked to her about Avery’s hobbies, and Ava says, of course (🍷). They talked about how Avery loves crafts, and Betty is a bit of a budding artist herself. And they talked about outings at children’s museums. Sonny says he knows Avery is going to miss Pilar, but this confidence Ava has in Betty goes a long way in persuading him.

Dante shows up in the alley, and says, so Dex is the one who called in a dead body. Dex says he’s not totally sure he’s dead. He didn’t want to touch the body, but he seems dead. Bennet joins them, and asks, where is it? Dex says, follow him, and takes them to Gordon. Dante puts on gloves and checks Gordon’s pulse, and says, yep, he’s a dead guy. He turns Gordon over, and there’s blood on the front of his shirt. Dante says, they’re going to need forensics down here, and Bennet says he’s on it. He leaves, and Dante asks what Dex thinks. Does Dex recognize him? Does Dex think he could be a known associate of Sonny’s?

Portia gives Curtis back his phone, giggles, and leaves.

Finn gets a text from the babysitter, and says he’ll ignore it, but Elizabeth insists he check his phone. He tells her the text said Violet went to bed on time, no problem. This is the time when she negotiates for staying up later or extra stories. Just like that, and not ask for anything? There’s something going on. She says, there are no problems with the boys either, and asks if he told Violet they were going out to dinner. He says he did. Did she tell the boys? She says, no, but she has the feeling Violet may have told them.

Chase and Brook come back to the pool with drinks, and Chase says he’s never had an old fashioned. Brook says, it’s one of her favorite summertime drinks, and he takes a sip, saying, it is good. They sit on chaise lounges, and she says, it’s nice having the pool all to themselves. He says, as long as they don’t get busted, and Brook says she’s going to ask Chase’s dad if he was always such a rule follower. Chase says, then he’s going to ask Ned if she was always such a rule breaker, and she says she bets he’d say she was. Now that she thinks about it, both of her parents encouraged her to break the rules, in their own ways. He says he actually went through a rebellious phase, and she says she’ll need to know more details. He says he can prove it. He had a motorcycle. He used to go skinny-dipping in the lake, and he’d spend all night at the casino. She says, him on a motorcycle, very hot. The gambling, she could take it or leave it, but the skinny-dipping? She doesn’t believe it. He says, Scout’s honor, and she says, prove it.

Betty leaves, and Sonny asks Ava, what’s going on? but she says, nothing is going on. He knows she hasn’t been happy with Pilar, and she’s trying to find a nanny they can agree on. He says, stop right there. Who’s that Betty woman, and what does she have on you?

Curtis reads, unfortunately, there’s no way to reverse damage to the spinal cord. Treatment can improve this person’s quality of life, but this condition can’t be cured. Portia comes back with a takeout shopping bag, and says she has their dinner. She knows it’s piping hot because she waited at the front door for the delivery guy to drop it off. She starts setting up the food, and says she’s sure they thought she was waiting for an ambulance with a patient in it. Curtis opens his container and takes a bite of spaghetti. He says, it’s good, and puts the container back down. He says, good call. Much better than hospital food. He feels better already.

Finn says, so Elizabeth thinks Violet told Jake and Aiden that they were on a date tonight? She says, look at this text from Jake, and he reads, enjoy dinner, mom. She says she didn’t tell him that she was having dinner. She just said she’d be home later. He says, so Violet texted Jake and Aiden, and said they were out to dinner. So be on their best behavior, so there wouldn’t be any reason to end the date early. She says, those boys would do anything for her, but to give them fair credit, ever since Cameron went away to college, they’ve gotten really good at taking care of themselves. He asks how much she misses Cam, and she says she tries not to focus on him being gone. It’s not like he was home much anyway; between soccer, and working at Kelly’s, and dating Josslyn. The good news is, he’s thriving at school, and every text she gets, he sounds incredibly happy. She thinks it’s fair to say he’s living his best life. He says he’s glad Cam’s having a good time, but she glossed over his question. She says she misses him so much, it physically hurts.

Forensics does their thing, and Dante asks Dex if the guy works for Sonny or not. Dex says, Dante will have to ask his dad himself. Bennet asks how Dex wound up in this alley, and Dex says he was leaving General Hospital and walking home. Bennet says, through an alley? but Dex says he wasn’t cutting through the alley. He went to throw his cup away in the dumpster and saw the guy’s feet sticking out. Bennet asks if that’s when he called the police, but Dex says, no. He decided he needed a few more details, so he moved closer to the man’s body and saw that he wasn’t moving. That’s when he called it in. Dante says, so tell him, what was he doing at General Hospital?

Sonny says, Ava is scared; he can tell. And it takes a lot to frighten her. She says she really thought she was covering it better than that, and he says, for most people, but not for him. He was just playing along, saying how perfect this nanny was. She says she’s glad he did, and he says, who are they threatening? She says her biological mother, Delia. She lives in Manhattan, and they said they would target her if Ava didn’t get this Betty in position with access to Sonny’s penthouse. He says, son of a bitch, and she says she’s sorry. She didn’t really have a choice. He says he needs more answers from her. Why are they making these threats against her? What do they have to do with him? And more important, if it involves his daughter, why is he hearing about this now?

Chase says, what does Brook mean, prove it? and she says, if he’s telling the truth and he’s so comfortable skinny-dipping, then he should have no problem getting in the pool and doing it right here. He says, what? and she laughs. She says she’s the only one here and she’s already seen it all. So go for it, bad boy. He says, okay. He’ll do it if she’ll join him. She says, this is his thing, and he says, chicken. She says she’s not chicken; she’s just being a lady. He says he has a better idea. How about a little friendly competition? Loser has to jump in the pool – buck naked. She says, he knows she loves a good challenge. What’s the bet?

Elizabeth tells Finn that she knows being in California is good for Cameron. Having his first love break his heart was so painful. He needs to start over. And now he’s on the soccer team. Finn says, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t miss him, and she says she’s already thinking it’s not that far away that Jake’s going to be in college. She can’t even imagine Aiden leaving her. They’re growing up. They’re becoming more independent by the day. He says, she did an amazing job raising him, and she thanks him. She says she’s really proud of them. It does make her sad that Cameron’s childhood is basically over, and soon Jake and Aiden’s will be too. She’s really grateful the Head Nurse position came around when it did. It’s going to keep her busy. He says, now she has less free time than anyone he knows, and she laughs. He says, can he ask her a question? Tell him all the things she’d do if she had all the time in the world.

Portia and Curtis finish dinner, and she says, it was good, wasn’t it? It makes her regret letting her cooking skills slide over the years. He says he didn’t realize how much she enjoyed cooking, and she says, especially when Trina was younger. She would arrange her work schedule so she’d be home in time to cook dinner. Then when Trina got home, she’d sit at the dining room table and do her homework while she cooked. It was kind of their time to connect and tell each other about their day. She says she’s sorry. She’s just realizing, he may not want to hear about Trina’s childhood, because he wasn’t there… He says he’s not feeling that way at all. He’s eager to learn about how Trina was growing up. It makes him happy to know they have such a special connection, and he wants to know all there is to know about his daughter. She says, good. She’ll be glad to let him know all there is to know about Trina’s past. Because Trina and Curtis are going to work out their future together. He says he knows that too.

Ava says, there’s a man, Mason Gatlin, and Sonny says, Gatlin as in Austin Gatlin-Holt? She says, apparently, he’s Austin’s cousin from Pautuck. He’s been pressuring – and by pressuring she means threatening – her to get information about Sonny and this company Pikeman. He says, there’s got to be more to the story than that, but she says she doesn’t know anything more. Mason is really just following orders of whoever’s pulling the strings. Mason told her to search Sonny’s penthouse. The only time she was left there alone, she tried, but of course (🍷) he keeps his home office locked. Then Pilar showed up so that put an end to any potential snooping. She told Mason that she couldn’t give him what he wanted, and he came up with the idea to replace Avery’s nanny with a nanny he could control. Sonny says, so this Mason is making threats against Ava to get information on him. Can she fill him in on one more thing? Where does her boyfriend Austin fit in to all this?

Chase tells Brook, they’re using this bowl of nuts as their competition. Whoever can throw and catch the most peanuts in their mouth, wins. The loser has to get in the pool, nekkid. She asks if he just said nekkid. He’s so immature. He says, they’re two grown adults making a bet about who’s going skinny-dipping in the pool of one of the nicest hotels. He thinks all of this is a little immature. She says, not to mention breaking the rules, and he says he already told her that he can break the rules. She’s says, okay, and he tells her to go first. She’s pretty good at this, and he asks if she practices at night. She finally misses one, and says, eight. He takes the bowl, and he’s not bad either. He tells her that he got nine in a row and it beats eight. She’s going in.

Bennet tells Dante that the dead guy’s license says his name is Gordon Stevens. They’re doing a record check to see if he has any prior arrests, and they’re still waiting on the official autopsy report. Dante tells Bennet to let him know when it comes back, and goes over to Dex, who asks if he’s free to go. Dante says, he’s not. He still hasn’t answered Dante’s question. What was he doing at GH? Dex says he was there checking on Curtis Ashford.

Ava tells Sonny, trust her. Masons been threatening and blackmailing Austin just like he’s been doing to her. Austin doesn’t want to have anything to do with his cousin, but so far, he hasn’t found a way to get out from under him. In fact, Austin’s been scrambling to help her. Sonny says, it was Austin who conveniently found Avery who was lost at the park, and Ava wasn’t just a concerned mother. She immediately insisted Avery was kidnapped. She says, Austin orchestrated the whole thing as a way for Sonny to lose faith in Pilar. She was no part of the plan; he did it on his own. She had no knowledge of it whatsoever. He says, so the goal was to get Pilar fired so she’d be replaced with a plant from Mason, is that right? Ava says, believe her. She was furious about it too, but please keep in mind Avery was never in any actual real danger. She wasn’t even frightened. She just ran off after a balloon. Sonny says, that’s why it makes sense that Pilar got that call from her grandma. Whatever differences he and Ava have had in the past, he knows she would never endanger their child. She says, of course (🍷) not, and he says, why did she not tell him about this the minute she heard they were planning on planting a nanny to take care of their daughter?

Portia tells Curtis that she doesn’t know if her pomodoro is as good as the restaurant’s, but hers was still good, if she does say so herself. Cooking for her loved ones always made her so happy. He says he can see that, and she says she thinks when Trina went off to college is when she stopped cooking. Her work schedule got so busy, and she relied more and more on take-out, and the food delivery apps are too convenient. But now that she’ll be cutting back on her hours at work, she’s going to make it a priority to be home in time to cook dinner. He asks, why exactly is she cutting back on work hours?

Brook says she thinks they should make it best two out of three, and Chase asks, why? He already won. Why would he mess with that? She asks if he’s saying he’s convinced he won’t beat her again, and he says, no. He’s saying he already won. Why would he gamble on a sure thing? Unless she’s saying she’s not willing to pay up on what they agreed on. She tells him, of course (🍷) she’s not saying that. A bet is a bet, and she never backs out of a bet. She starts to unbutton her dress, and says, what about the security cameras here? He says, she wasn’t concerned about security cameras when she thought he was the one who was going to be doing the striptease, and she says, he expects a strip show? He says, she’s damn right, and she says, in that case, she’ll need some inspiration. She kisses him, and he gets up and starts taking off his clothes. She asks what he’s doing; he won. He tells her, let’s just say, he’s willing to pay for her bet. Because that kiss was more than worth it. He gets nakey, and jumps in the pool.

Elizabeth tells Finn that she doesn’t think about it very often because there’s just not enough time, but every now and then she thinks about going back to painting. He says, she likes to paint? and she says she did it for years, then got back into it when she fell in love with Franco… Oh, that was weird. Was that weird? Sorry. He says, don’t apologize. That’s not weird at all. He knows it’s hard to believe, but he’s had past relationships too. She says she knows, and he says, sometimes it’s hard to shake those histories. She loved Franco; he loved her. Finn can see why. The host says, sorry to interrupt, but the kitchen is closing soon. Would they like to order dessert? Elizabeth says, oh my goodness. They’re the last people here. Finn says he’s sorry they kept the staff late, but the host says, not a problem. They can have the table as long as they want. Finn says, it’s up to her. Does she want dessert? She says she’d love that, and the host leaves. So does he guess?

Brook holds up a towel, and Chase gets out. He says he told her that he could prove it, and thanks her for the towel as he puts it around him. She thanks him for what he did, and the view was impressive. She wants to keep it to herself and doesn’t want the MetroCourt guests getting an eyeful. Not to mention, if he’d gotten caught skinny-dipping in the pool, the hotel would have called the cops – also known as his colleagues – and it would have been really embarrassing. He says, it’s just a misdemeanor, but now she knows that he’s willing to break the rules for her. They kiss.

Elizabeth and Finn share what looks like chocolate lava cake, and Elizabeth says, this is so decadent. Not like her at all. He asks if she’s talking about the dessert, and she says, the dessert, being the last people in the restaurant, keeping the waiter late… She asks if he doesn’t want anymore, and he says he wants more, and kisses her.

Portia says she’s cutting back on her hours at work so she can spend more time with Curtis at the hospital. She knows how eager he is to get home, but they both have to face the fact that his recovery is going to be a process. His prognosis hasn’t been determined yet, and they just don’t know so many things. They don’t know if he’s lost the use of his legs short-term or maybe longer, but either way, they’ll adapt. He says, she sounds like she has some very specific thoughts in mind, and she says, as much as she loves their beach house, there’s a lot of stairs in that house. Maybe it would better suit them to rent someplace that’s all one-level, so he doesn’t have to deal with any stairs at all. He says he doesn’t want them to give up their home, but she says she’s just trying to plan for their future. They can hire a contractor. A contractor can modify the house and make it more livable for Curtis. Curtis says, no. That’s not what they’re going to do. If he’s never going to walk again… She says, they don’t know that’s the case, and he says, but it’s a likely possibility. And if that is the case, she’s not going to remodel their home. What she’s going to do is let him go. Ugh. I hate when they play martyr.

Dex tells Dante that he and Josslyn were in the park with Trina the night Curtis got shot. They took Trina to the hospital. She’s been so worried about her father, and she’s Joss’s best friend. So that’s what they were doing. Dante says, wow. That’s nice of him. He was convinced Dex was doing something for Sonny at the hospital. Bennet tells Dante to come look at the records check on the victim, and Dante tells Dex, wait here. Dante comes back in a hot second, and tells Dex that he’s free to go. If they have any more questions, they’ll find him. Actually, this guy is from Pautuck and did time in Pentenville. Any of that ring a bell with him?

Sonny says, if this Mason character has been threatening Ava for months, especially if she knew it involved their daughter, why didn’t she come to him? She says she thought she could handle it herself… and Sonny yells, this Mason guy has something on her. He has leverage. What is it? What does Mason know that he doesn’t? What? She says, he knows that she killed Nikolas.

Tomorrow, Josslyn asks who Dex was expecting; Ava says she’ll do what she can to protect her; Sonny says he’s going to take care of everything; and Curtis says, there’s no way in hell that is happening.

🚪 Closing the Door…

Thank God they finally picked a lane.

👠 Not Who You Think…

How do you finesse going to prison into not hurting each other?

🗽 Six Degrees Of LVP…

I have to admit I’m surprised. She wasn’t too impressive on RHONY, and came off as an immature, spoiled brat.

🍸 Must Be In the Water…

More surprises. Why is she giving out the awful advice that Rachel/ Raquel/Rachel should milk the Scandoval cow?

On the other hand, can’t blame her here. Suckerfish Hoppy was quite the nightmare.

🦥 You Too Can Have Weird…

They’re still cute.

🚬 Dave’s Not Here…

Join me tomorrow for soap and kicking a few oranges around the OC. Until then, stay safe, stay exercising self-control, and stay not going for best two out of three if you’ve already won.

July 19, 2023 – Portia Confronts Spencer, Tamra Continues To Be a Screeching Moron, Another New One, NYC Talk & Lollipops

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

As Gladys, Maxie, and Sasha got to a table in the pool area, Maxie says she spoke to the Crimson journalist who’s going to be interviewing Sasha about the tone of the piece. She happens to be a good friend of Maxie’s, and is very sympathetic to Sasha’s situation. Not to mention, she loves a sob story about someone coming back after being down and out. Not that Sasha is a sob story. Sasha says, nope, she’s just a thief, but Maxie says, she’s not that either. She’s just had a rough couple of years. And in the interest of transparency, she wants to tell her side of the story about what happened at Logan’s. Sasha says, right. She’s coming forward of her own volition to take responsibility for her actions and speak about her recent mental health issues. Maxie says, maybe say journey… Unless she thinks it’s too woo-woo. Gladys says she likes it, and Maxie says, then maybe not. She’s going to say this one last time; Sasha does not have to do the interview. The story that broke was a blind piece about a model shoplifting. Nobody knows it was her. Gladys says, not yet anyway, and tells Sasha that she trusts her impulse to get ahead of the story. Sasha thanks Gladys for faith in her, and she just prays everything goes smoothly. Maxie says she’ll be right by Sasha’s side to make sure it does, and Gladys says, oh great, as Cody walks in. She says, Cody Bell is the last thing they need right now, and he lies down on a chaise lounge.

In Alexis’s office, Esme looks through some boxes of papers on the floor. She hears something, and quickly puts everything back in the boxes, but Alexis walks in before she’s done and asks, what is she doing?

Sonny lets Kristina into the penthouse, and she says she’s glad he texted. She was already gearing up for the rest of the day. Sonny says, she knows he’s always here for her. What’s going on? She says she applied for the wrong building permit. She thought she filed it correctly, but it turns out, she didn’t. No one bothered to let her know, so now she’s in violation of Title VII.III of some thousand-page indecipherable law. He says, she has to take a breath, and she says she’s trying, but just like everything else in her life, it feels like her foundation is just being ripped out from under her.

There’s a knock at the door, and we hear, the role of Molly is being played by Brook Ann Smith (see below). Great. It was hard enough keeping nuMolly and nuKristina straight, but at least the old nuMolly was a head taller than everyone else. Not so this one. Molly thanks Sam for letting her stop by, and Sam says, she’s always welcome here. Molly says she’s been spending so much time at GH waiting for updates on Curtis, and on top of that, Kristina just had to make everything so much harder than it has to be. But really, does that surprise anyone? Sam asks, what happened? and Molly says, mom didn’t clue Sam in? Sam says, mom stopped by last night, but she doesn’t know if what Alexis told her is what Molly is talking about. Molly says, Kristina has decided she’s going to be the surrogate for her and TJ’s baby. Then she discusses it with Sam and Alexis without even bothering to tell her and TJ. So now, as usual, she and TJ were the last to know.

Taggert looks at a photo of him and Trina on his phone, when Trina comes in. They hug, and Trina thanks him for asking her to meet him for breakfast, but she can’t stay long. She has to go back to the hospital. He says he understands she has to be there, but she has to eat, and she says, she knows. But she feels guilty when she’s away from the hospital. She feels like she should support mom and d… Curtis, because it feels like he may never wake up.

Portia says, come on, Curtis. It’s time to wake up. They’ve all been here waiting for him. Trina’s here, his dad, his Aunt Stella. Even his girl Nina was here. They all love and miss him so much. Spencer walks in, and Portia turns to see him. He says he didn’t mean to intrude, and she says, Trina’s not here. She went to have breakfast with her dad. If it’s important, Spencer can give her a call. Spencer thanks her and says he’ll get out of her hair (another phrase they say a lot that no one else does). He leaves, and Marshall comes in. He asks if there’s any change, but Portia says, nothing. All they can do is wait. Meanwhile, Spencer, of all people, decides to stop by. Marshall says he’s sure Spencer was just looking for Trina, and she says, he was, but she told him that Trina was having breakfast with her dad, so thankfully, he left. Marshall says, not exactly. He’s sitting right out there in the waiting area, and doesn’t look like he’s leaving any time soon. She glances out the window and sees Spencer.

Taggert says he promises Trina is going to get through this crisis. It’s a hard lesson learned, and he hates that she’s learning it at such a young age, but she needs to understand she has a whole family that loves and supports her. He takes her hand and says, she doesn’t have to go through this on her own. She says, but she can’t help but feel like being here with him, she’s giving up on Curtis.

Portia comes out, and Spencer says he hopes Trina is enjoying breakfast with her… dad. He was just going to wait for her here, unless Portia would rather he leave, because he can. She says, no. She wants him to stay because there’s something she needs to say, and she needs him to hear what she has to say.

Molly wonders when Alexis came by Sam’s last night. Was it before or after Molly saw her at GH? Sam says, after, but she promises mom wasn’t trying to keep anything from Molly. They didn’t know Molly overheard Kristina saying she wanted to be a surrogate for her and TJ. They were trying to stop her from saying anything insensitive or hurtful. Molly says she just wishes that idea had worked, because TJ was furious, and Sam says, Kristina was really just trying to help them out. Molly says, by swooping in with this great plan? Would Sam ever have done that? Sam says, no, and Molly says, of course (🍷) she wouldn’t. Because she understands their fertility issue is a private topic. It’s their problem to figure out, not Kristina’s. Sam says, Molly has every right to be angry… and Molly says, angry hardly describes it. She doesn’t know if their relationship as sisters will ever be the same.

Sonny says, in his experience, dealing with these big shot types, you’ve got to be patient. It’s not easy. You got to have everything exact. She says she’s so mad at herself for making such a stupid mistake, and he asks if she’s done this before. She says, no, and he asks why she thinks she has to be perfect right out of the gate. She’s learning on the job. She asks if he has any bright ideas on how she can fix it, and he says he’ll make a few calls and take care of this, but she says, no. It’s her mess and she’s going to fix it herself. He says, then she has to own her mistake and make it clear what it is she needs to fix it. Then do it in person. She says, of course (🍷), and thanks him, and he says, anytime. Her mom mentioned she might need some support. She says, so mom’s been talking to him about her behind her back.

Esme says, she had them put some boxes in Alexis’s office, and when she picked up one of them, the lid fell off… Alexis says she wasn’t asking Esme for an excuse. She was asking for an explanation. Esme says, it wasn’t an excuse. She was just trying to be more proactive like Alexis asked. Alexis says, and by proactive, Esme interpreted that to mean she could comb through Alexis’s documents? Esme says she never would have done it, but they’re all about her. Is Alexis researching her? Is that why Alexis hired her in the first place, so she could do some story?

Gladys says she’s going to talk to Cody, but Sasha says, he has every right to be here. Gladys says, he does, but he’s clearly a distraction. Does Sasha really need that right now? This interview has to go perfectly. Maxie says, smoothly. Stay here. She’ll talk to Cody. Sasha thanks her, and Maxie leaves. Gladys says, Sasha is going to do great, but is she keeping up with her meds? Sasha takes a pill out of her purse and swallows it. No water because she’s a pro at this.

Maxie taps Cody on the head, startling him, and he says he swears he didn’t know they were here. It’s his day off. She asks if he can at least do them a favor and stay away from Sasha. She needs some space. He promises he won’t bust into their brunch by the pool, but Maxie says, it’s a little more than a brunch. Sasha’s telling her side of the story about what happened at Logan’s. He says he didn’t know the story came out, and she says, there was a blind piece in The Sun. He says, if it didn’t mention Sasha by name, why is she coming forward? Won’t that just make things worse?

Gladys tells Sasha, maybe Maxie was right. Maybe this is a bad idea. Sasha says, Gladys told her that she should do it, and Gladys says, what does she know about publicity? Sasha says, maybe there’s still time to cancel, and takes out her phone, when a woman calls her name. She holds out her hand and says, Alyse Taylor. Ready to tell her side of the story? Sasha asks if she isn’t a bit early. Maxie is supposed to be here for this. Gladys says, don’t mind Sasha; she’s a little out of practice. Alyse says, they can push back the interview if she needs more time to prepare, but Sasha says, let’s do it. Besides, she’s an open book. No need to prepare if you’ve got nothing to hide.

Maxie tells Cody, look. Sasha felt she owed the public an explanation, and she respects that. He asks, who’s that with Sasha now? and Maxie says, dammit. She wanted to do the introductions. Whatever he does, do not come over to their table. And would it kill him to put a shirt on or something? He says, at the pool? and she says, whatever. Just don’t come over to their table. He says he’s not going to. Just take care of Sasha.

Molly tells Sam, time after time, she’s made allowances for Kristina’s feelings, thinking somehow, she overshadowed Kristina. All of her achievements made Kristina feel less than. So what did she do? She apologized for not being sensitive enough or that she was too uptight and stood in Kristina’s path. But now she’s wrestling with something difficult and painful, and maybe even life changing. Except what is their family doing again? They’re all tiptoeing around Kristina’s feelings. Sam says, she and mom never thought of it that way, and Molly says, none of them do because Kristina has to make everything about her. Except this time, she’s the one with the health condition, not Kristina. Yet what are they all talking about? They’re all talking about Kristina wanting to be the surrogate for her and TJ. Sam says she knows Molly is upset and she really wants to be there for her, but maybe it’s not Kristina who Molly has the probably with. Molly says, in what world is Kristina not her problem? and Sam says, she’s talking about a family dynamic that’s obviously been bothering her for a really long time. So maybe her issue isn’t with Kristina. Maybe it’s more with her and mom, because they take Molly for granted, and spend more time focused on Kristina. Any chance that’s what’s making her so upset?

Sonny tells Kristina that Alexis hinted there was something wrong, but it was Kristina’s story to tell, and she doesn’t want to betray Kristina’s confidence. Kristina says, did she or did she not ask Sonny to come and talk to her? and he says, Alexis suggested that they have a conversation. There’s no harm in that. She says, of course (🍷). It’s just so obvious that no one trusts her to make decisions about her own life.

Trina says, it’s been so crazy, and she just doesn’t think she’s been making enough time for Taggert, but he says, it’s a little hard to make time for her dad when she’s being held hostage in Greenland by some maniac. She says, but ever since she got home, she feels like all her energy has been focused on figuring out her relationship with Curtis. She just feels like they haven’t been connecting the same way… not since they got those DNA results back. He says, it’s a fair statement, and she says, but they promised each other before they got those results, nothing was going to change between them. She thinks they just need to be honest. They’re struggling with this, aren’t they?

Spencer tells Portia that he knows Trina’s been here since Curtis was shot, and he knows he should have been here to support her. He really does wish he could have visited more. Portia says she hasn’t seen much of him, and he says he wanted to respect Trina’s boundaries. She says, not to mention his extremely complicated home life. It was one thing for him to be living with Esme while Laura and Doc were supervising, but now that they’re gone looking for Nikolas… He says, it’s not just him and Esme. And the only reason he’s living there is so he can help take care of his little brother Ace. She says, it’s got to be a lot of responsibility, and he says, more than he could have imagined. But he’s very lucky, because Trina has been incredibly patient and supportive of him. She says, that sounds like her daughter. She’s always been one to see the best in anyone. He says, even people who don’t deserve it, like him. But he can promise Portia that whatever happens with his little brother, he could never hurt Trina, because she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him. She says, really? and he says, without a doubt. She says, then can he answer her this? Is he the best thing that’s happened to Trina?

Sonny says he hopes Kristina knows he’s supportive of her, and she says, he might be the only one. He says, she has to help him out, because if this isn’t about the foundation, and it’s some personal issue, he’s flying blind here. She has to give him some details and tell him what’s going on. She tells him, let’s just say she had an idea to make an offer to help Molly, and he asks what she means. She says she can’t say exactly, but it would have been a really big deal for both of them. She told mom and Sam about it the other night, but they completely shot her down. They said, Molly wouldn’t want her to interfere, and she didn’t think this through, and she had no idea what she was getting herself into. He asks if she did know what she was getting herself into, and she says, no, but she would have figured it out. But that’s not even the problem. The problem is, Molly figured out what she wanted to do, and it turns out mom and Sam were right. For whatever reason, her offering to help Molly was the worst thing she’s ever done in her entire life.

Molly says, this isn’t about Sam and mom. It’s about Kristina. From Kristina’s perspective, all she has to do is offer to be her surrogate, and all Molly’s problems are solved. It’s like she’s saying, let her have a baby for them, and everyone will congratulate her for being the savior for this poor barren couple. Then once again, Kristina is the center of attention. Sam says, Molly needs to take a step back, because that is not at all how Kristina presented being a surrogate for her and TJ. She was just really focused on wanting the two of them to be parents. Was it an impulsive idea? 100% yeah. But Sam doesn’t doubt for a second that she had good intentions. Molly says, Sam’s taking her side? but Sam says she isn’t. They’re her sisters, and she’s just trying to understand. No way would Kristina ever want to hurt Molly. Molly says, Kristina may not have wanted to hurt her, but she really did, and Sam says, Molly wasn’t there for the entire conversation. At the end of that conversation, Kristina agreed to wait until she and TJ decided for surrogacy or not. If they didn’t want to do that, Kristina would have been totally fine with that. Molly asks if Sam doesn’t think it would have become something about her rejecting Kristina or not trusting her, and Sam says she can’t predict the future, but she’s really surprised by Molly’s attitude right now. Molly says, Sam is surprised that she’s angry, but Sam says, she’s not surprised Molly’s angry, but it doesn’t make sense that she’s directing all her anger at Kristina. Molly says, because having a kid isn’t a big deal to her. She doesn’t want a kid, but Molly does. And she can’t have one, but Kristina can. In what world is that fair? Sam hugs Molly.

Alexis says she doesn’t have to explain anything to Esme, let alone why she chooses to choose any document from the archives. And as much as Esme’s curiosity is piqued, that doesn’t give Esme the right to rummage through her office. Move. Esme steps out of the way, and Alexis moves the boxes. She says she can’t believe she’s having this conversation, and Esme says she’s sorry. She hasn’t exactly had a job before. Alexis says she wouldn’t have guessed, and Esme asks, what happens now? Is Alexis going to fire her? Alexis says, not that Esme deserves an explanation, but these documents aren’t about her. She has a reporter who wants to do a retrospective on Heather Webber and Ryan Chamberlain’s reign of terror in Port Charles. Esme says, her biological mother and father, and Alexis says she requested the material as a matter of due diligence. She hasn’t decided yet whether she’s going to approve the retrospective or not. Esme says she’s begging Alexis, do not publish that story, but Alexis says, that’s not how she runs a newspaper. Esme says she thought Alexis, of all people, would understand how she feels.

Maxie greets Alyse, and says, as she’s sure Sasha was just explaining, there were a few misunderstandings that happened at Logan’s that they all want to clear up. They recently adjusted the deals in the loaning contract between Logan’s and Deception, and Sasha’s been out for a while, so she’s not quite caught up. So actually this whole thing is just some big non-story. Gladys says, Sasha’s just a little confused, that’s all, and Maxie says, Sasha just wasn’t clear on the terms of the agreement. Alyse says, makes sense to her, but she was really hoping Sasha would speak for herself. Not just about what happened at Logan’s, but how she’s coping with her return to the spotlight. She’s been through so much – the loss of her husband, the loss of her child – and she had a very public breakdown on the Home & Heart shopping channel. All that pain… Their readers really want to know, how does she keep going?

Taggert tells Trina that he wouldn’t say they were struggling… Okay. He’s been holding back a bit. He doesn’t want to be a burden. She says, but he’s not a burden. When she was angry at mom for lying to her, and trying to sort out her feelings for Curtis, she assumed he’d always be there for her. He says, because it’s true. There’s nothing she could say or do that would change how he feels about her. Besides, she’s going through that time in her life where spending less time with her parents is natural. She’s growing up. She’s finding her way in the world. She has no time for a parent, even though they know it will happen eventually. She says she thought it was different with them. She’s trying to understand where she came from and who she is. He says, the person to help her do that is Curtis.

Spencer tells Portia, honestly, he doesn’t know if he’s the best thing that’s happened to Trina. She’d have to ask Trina, but he certainly knows he’s not the worst thing. Portia says, really? Because from what she recalls, some of the worst moments that were in her daughter’s life all have one common denominator. They all happened because of him. Her daughter was arrested for creating revenge porn of her best friends Josslyn and Cam. And who’s the real guilty party? It was Esme. Who brought Esme to Port Charles? It was him. Trina was almost kicked out of PCU; she was put on trial. And if she was convicted, that would have haunted her for the rest of her life. He says he’s not disagreeing with anything she’s saying, but he and Trina have made a real effort to work past those things. Portia asks if they’ve worked past those things, or has Trina simply overlooked them? What about the fact of Trina following him on that boat and being trapped with his insane great uncle. The only reason Trina is alive is because Curtis saved her, not Spencer. He says, Trina should probably run as far away from him as she possibly can, but what is so amazing is that she hasn’t. She’s chosen not to. Despite everything that’s happened, Portia’s daughter has chosen to stand beside him, and he thinks they’re good for each other. And he thinks he makes her happy. Portia asks how he can say that with a straight face. After everything he’s put her daughter through, he still chose to move in with Esme, the person who caused her daughter all that pain. So no. Absolutely not. She doesn’t think he makes Trina happy at all.

Taggert tells Trina, Curtis is tough. He’s going to pull through. She says she hopes he’s right. She doesn’t know what she’d do if she lost the chance to get to know him. She looks at her phone and says she has to get back to the hospital. She hugs Taggert, and tells him that she loves him. He says, him too, and she says, it’s nice to know she can count on him. He says, always, and she leaves.

Sam says, Molly not being able to carry a child isn’t fair at all, and Molly says, Kristina just throwing it out there like that, that she could carry a child for Molly. She’s clueless about how sad Molly is. TJ’s equally as sad. They both thought she’d be pregnant one day, and that there would be sonograms, getting tiny clothes, and TJ would put his hand on her belly and feel it kick. None of that’s going to happen now. Sam wipes a tear from Molly’s cheek, and says, Kristina knows Molly is having a hard time, but maybe she doesn’t understand all the reasons why. Has she talked to Kristina about it? Molly says, before they blew up, hardly. Kristina makes her uncomfortable; she goes on and on about her foundation. Sam says, Molly has to talk to her and be direct, but Molly says, no. She’s not doing that. She’s so tired of always being the bigger person. Kristina needs to figure this one out on her own.

Sonny says, Kristina knows he loves her, right? and she says, of course (🍷) she does. That’s not the issue. He says he doesn’t seem to know what the issue is exactly, but she needs to have a conversation with Molly. She says she wishes she could. She wishes it were that simple. They could just say, weapons down, and have a sister heart-to-heart, but that’s not going to happen. She knows the way they see her. To Molly and TJ, it’s like, doctor and lawyer versus the college dropout. That’s just the way it is. They think she’s irresponsible and that she’s self-serving, and that she just fundamentally can’t be trusted. Maybe they’re right. He says, she’s beating herself up, and he doesn’t want to pile on… She says, he’s not piling it on. She just doesn’t know what to do. He says, she told him it was an impulsive decision to help Molly. Kristina needs to figure out why she’s so willing to help her. Kristina says, because she wanted to help, and he says, there’s no other reason? What about the foundation? She said she wanted to make a difference in Port Charles, but then she wanted to be in charge of something. She said she wanted some flexibility, and then she wanted something creative. Does she see what he’s saying? It wasn’t totally self-sacrificing. She needs to figure out why it was so important to do that and have a conversation. He doesn’t want anything to come between the two of them.

Sasha tells Alyse that her family is supportive, and gives her the strength to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Gladys and Maxie move to the side, and Gladys wonders what Cody is still doing here. She thought Maxie was going to get rid of him. Maxie says, it’s a public place; he’s fine. We see Cody looking through a magazine, with his shirt on, and Gladys tells Maxie, says you. She’s going to go talk to him. Maxie says, whatever, and Gladys goes over to Cody.

Alyse says, poor thing, and wasn’t Sasha involved with Cyrus Renault for a time? Maxie jets over to the table, and says, that was the past. They’re focusing on the present. Alyse says she thought Maxie told her, no holds barred, and Maxie says, within reason.

Gladys kicks Cody’s chaise, and says, beat it. He sits up and says, excuse me? and she says, Sasha doesn’t need him distracting her. Not when she’s trying to concentrate on an important interview.

Sasha says, that was a long time ago, and Maxie says, she doesn’t have to talk about Cyrus. No one wants to talk about him. She says she thought she and Alyse had an understanding. Sasha watches as Gladys argues with Cody, and he turns into Cyrus.

Spencer tells Portia that Esme is his brother’s mom. He doesn’t like living with her either, but he’s kind of stuck with her right now. She says, he is, but does Trina need to be? That girl tormented her daughter and he’s living with her. Spencer says, she’s right. It’s a complicated situation. She says, maybe it is, and maybe it isn’t, and he says he’s not going to turn his back on his little brother. She says she gets that, but if he really cares for Trina the way he says he does, and he’s stuck with Esme, wouldn’t he want to spare Trina from continually having to see her? Wouldn’t the selfless, mature thing to do be to let Trina go? Trina shows up, and says, he’s here, hugging Spencer.

Curtis moves his hand, and Marshall asks if Curtis can hear him. He calls Curtis’s name.

Trina says she just had breakfast with her dad at Kelly’s. She didn’t know Spencer was coming by. Portia says, it gave them a chance to chat, when Marshall comes out and tells Portia, come quick. He thinks Curtis is waking up. Portia and Trina run into Curtis’s room.

Esme says, all she’s asking is for Alexis to have a little heart. She’s a Cassadine, right? So she knows what it’s like to be judged by her relatives even though she’s done nothing wrong. She’s just trying to explain… Alexis says she’s going to stop Esme right there. That comparison is not only inappropriate and false, it’s really irritating. She is a Cassadine, and her family is very complicated, which is why she did the work to confront her past. She worked really hard to establish herself as her own person apart from her family. So a Cassadine doesn’t define her, nor she them, but Esme on the other hand, claims she doesn’t remember her past – Esme says she doesn’t – which doesn’t mean she doesn’t have one. She does, and she’s done nothing to earn that clean slate. Which is why she’s sure the stories about Esme’s biological mother and father frighten her. She’s worked really hard to try to be civil to Esme, but she doesn’t trust Esme, nor does anyone else. Now if she wants to change that, Alexis suggests she take a really good, long, hard look at herself and her past, and face what she did. Because other than that, these boxes are the least of her problems.

Sasha sees Cyrus arguing with Gladys instead of Cody, blinks, then sees Cody. Maxie asks if she’s okay, and Sasha says she just thought she saw someone she knows. Maxie tells Alyse that they’re going to reschedule the interview. She thinks Sasha’s had a little too much sun. Sasha says, no. She wants to tell her story.

Gladys says she wants to know why Cody wants to bother a troubled young woman, and he asks, what happened? Sasha was doing great as far as he could tell. She says, far being the operative word. He wasn’t there, so how would he know?

Sasha says, yes, she’s been through a lot… like many people. Probably like a lot of Alyse’s readers. Mental illness isn’t uncommon, and the stigma of mental health issues is still… She sees Cyrus with Gladys again, and he looks at her.

Sonny says, Kristina knows he’s always here for her, right? and she says he does, and thanks him. Sometimes she feels so alone in this family, it’s nice to know someone has her back. He says, she’s not alone, and she says, we’ll see. He tells her to think about what he said, and she promises she will. They exchange I love yous, and she leaves.

Alexis says, Esme may not remember her past, but she can’t pretend it didn’t happen because it will find her. Alexis’s phone rings, and she says she needs to take this. She says hello to Sonny, and Esme quickly takes a paper from one of the boxes. Alexis says, she came to his house? Good. Esme slips the paper into her blouse, and Alexis tells Sonny, hold on for a second. She asks why Esme is still here, and Esme bolts to the door. She walks out, and Alexis says, shut the door, so she does. In the hallway, she takes the paper out, and looks at it. It’s a copy of an Invader article with the headline: Heather Webber, Hook Killer, Moved To Pentenville.

Sam says, if Kristina doesn’t say the right thing to Molly, what does that mean for the two of them? but Molly doesn’t know. She says, maybe they need some time apart. There’s a knock at the door, and Sam opens it. Kristina says, thank God she’s home. She’s not going to believe… Molly.

Taggert looks at the photo of him and Trina again, and takes a flask out of his pocket. He pours something into his coffee. I’m guessing whiskey.

Portia asks if Curtis can hear her, and Marshall says he swears he saw Curtis’s fingers move. Portia says, it could have just been a muscle twitch. It doesn’t mean he’s waking up. But wait. It does. Curtis opens his eyes, and Portia says, welcome back. Spencer looks in from the hallway.

Sasha sees Cyrus laughing at her, and jumps up. Maxie asks, what’s wrong?

Gladys asks if Cody hears her. She doesn’t want him anywhere near Sasha. He gets up and says, they both know that Gladys isn’t in any position to give him orders. She says, he doesn’t intimidate her, poking him in the chest, and he says he’d really prefer if she didn’t touch him. She says, oh yeah? Is he going to stop her? She pushes him, and he grabs her wrist.

Sasha sees Gladys struggling with Cyrus, and Maxie asks if she’s all right. Sasha goes to the bar and grabs a knife. Gladys tells Cody to let her go, when Sasha comes up behind him and stabs him. He turns around, feeling his back, and sees blood on his hand. Sasha holds a bloody knife, and Cody says, why? sinking to his knees.

Tomorrow, (the real) Cyrus says he wants it to end; Kristina asks if that’s really how someone sees her; and Esme tells someone that they’re the only one who can get her the information she needs.

The Real Housewives of Orange County

This episode was everything I don’t like about the show. Mostly Tamra. Seriously, this woman needs medication, and if she’s on it already, she needs a changeup.

Aww, Archie was still alive. Nothing sweeter than an old Golden Retriever. Shannon was also still with John. It’s weird when you know things have changed since filming. They’d been discussing living together, but not in any detail. She wasn’t in any rush. In her interview, she said, some people rush into things, but she prefers to take her time. There were red flags with David she refused to see. John said he got stressed out just hearing about the things in Shannon’s world, and she said she also had three kids going to college soon. He wished she could turn her mind off; it was spinning all the time.

Tamra and Emily went for a pedicure, and Tamra told Emily about Heather shoveling sh*t and how she’d said she appreciated those who did manual labor now. In Emily’s interview, she said, it was mind-boggling that Heather had an ah-ha moment about appreciating manual labor in her 50s. Heather joined them, and Emily asked how Taylor was on the trip. Heather said Taylor claimed she was condescending, and Emily said, Heather could be hurtful. Heather said Emily was assuming she was in the wrong, but Emily said, Heather came across like she was better than everyone else and her life was more important. Maybe she didn’t mean it, but it’s how it was being received. In Heather’s interview she said, let’s talk about Emily’s behavior – ugh. I hate those what about you? people – and in Emily’s interview, she said, maybe no one ever told Heather before. I’m guessing, Heather never let them get a word in. Heather told them she’d planned a Duffy (a golf cart on the water!) cruise before dinner, and Tamra said she couldn’t make it because she had an audition for Taylor’s new movie, which was actually pretty funny.

Jenn did her namaste thing at her yoga studio. She said she needed the studio because she wanted to feel like she didn’t need to rely on anyone to provide for her and the kids. Gina came to visit, and said Jenn was the only person she’d do yoga for. She felt badly about what happened in Montana, and said she’d been forced to process feelings she hadn’t processed yet. She’d been where Jenn was. Jenn said she felt bad for a long time, but realized the people who love you might not approve of your behavior, but they would still love you. Stuff was said by Tamra that she had no idea, and she’d told Tamra to talk to her, not the group. In Gina’s interview, she said, Jenn had big expectations for someone who was never going to show up for her. Tamra had already shown up and dragged Jenn’s ass all over town.

Emily’s dog Togo was wearing the cone of shame, and Shane suggested everyone wear one so he didn’t feel alone. Ha-ha! I don’t care what anyone says; I like Shane. Emily had gotten childhood pictures from her mom, and in Emily’s interview, she said her mother was depressed when they were little and slept a lot. She and her sister had to fend for themselves. She told Shane that her mom hadn’t been there since 2019, and he suggested Emily have her visit. She called her mom and said the pictures made her realize how quickly the kids were growing, and she thought her mom should visit. In her interview, Emily said she wanted get past anger and hurt, and let it go. She didn’t need an apology. She just wanted to go forward. Run, Emily. You’re much to sane for this Housewives nonsense.

Shannon took the twins shopping after their trip to Paris with their father. I only mention this because ugh, David. In Shannon’s interview, she said she was passionate about things that weren’t toxic, and wanted the girls to get clothes from a consignment shop, but it was a hard no on most of it. There was a huge discussion about the twins going to college, but all I came away with was that it was about $75K a year, and Shannon didn’t think they’d be inundated with scholarships. Shannon said she’d foot the bill for a college counselor, since apparently David can afford a trip to Paris, but not help for his kids to go to school.

Before the Duffy ride, Gina told Emily that she was still pissed at Heather, and Emily told Gina not to mess up the pool party she was going to have. Taylor arrived first, and Heather told her, the movie thing had gotten out of control. She was sorry for hurting Taylor’s feelings, and Taylor said, same. In Heather’s interview, she wasn’t quite as sorry. She was hoping they just made it to the entrée, and we flashed back to Heather kicking everyone out of her house last season. Poor acting coach Lauren also got roped into this trip, although maybe she’s taking notes for Marat/Sade. Tamra immediately started to irritate me, since she has no inside voice, and the only volume she has is high pitched and loud. Emily invited everyone to her pool party at her mother-in-law’s house, and I’m sure she’ll be sorry. Shannon pointed out the bridge John lived under, and Emily and I wondered if he was a troll. He really just lives in a houseboat, but that was exactly what it sounded like.

After the Duffy ride, they went to a restaurant. Heather made everyone sign a card for Max, who was having a hard time in Boston. She also had a personalized chopsticks at every place setting, as well as a candle. It said in Japanese, too fabulous to shovel sh*t, and in her interview, Emily said she didn’t know anyone who was so unaware of being unaware. I wonder why it’s always a candle, but I’m not a candle person. Tamra zeroed in on Jenn right away, and said Gina had been triggered by Jenn in Montana. Jenn said she and Gina had a real talk, and decided they were going forward. Emily asked if Jenn felt she was overlooking red flags, and Jenn said she’d get concerned if Ryan f***ed up (i.e. actually cheated). Tamra wasn’t having it because of Ryan cheating when they were on a break. She didn’t think Ryan was going to be loyal, and that’s what hurt. Jenn said, what hurt was Tamra airing her dirty laundry. Tamra’s pitch got higher as she babbled about Ryan wanting to do her, and how rumor had it he went after married women. Jenn intimated that Tamra had eyeballed Ryan before she and Ryan got together, and Tamra threw a napkin in Jenn’s face, and stormed out, saying, you need to leave your f***ing boyfriend, you f***ing bitch. In Jenn’s interview, she said, Tamra claimed she wanted to show up in the friendship, but this wasn’t showing up. She didn’t have one other friend who acted like this. News flash. I have no friends who act like this.

Shannon chased after Tamra, and in her interview, Heather said, Tamra could be mean (like this was a revelation) and she just didn’t want it directed toward her. Tamra told Shannon that Jenn was dating a d-bag, while at the table, Emily asked if Jenn was saying Tamra had the hots for Ryan. Jenn said there had been a lot of joking about how hot he was, and in Jenn’s interview, she said, Tamra had joked about it at the time, but now it made her uncomfortable. It wasn’t fair. In Shannon’s interview, she said, Jenn may be an idiot, but let her figure it out on her own. It troubles me when Shannon is the voice of reason. Tamra said she needed a shot of tequila which was probably the last thing she needed. Jenn said she didn’t believe the comment about Ryan wanting to do Tamra, but ever the bearer of hearsay tidings, Heather said, Tamra had heard it from several people. In Emily’s interview, she wondered how many napkins had to smack Jenn in the face before she says something negative about Tamra. Clearly more than one. At the bar inside, Tamra yelled that she needed a shot and a Xanax, then made a rude comment to a married guy at the bar. In her interview, Emily said she thought Heather was afraid of Tamra, since she could be nasty. As soon as Tamra came around again, Heather wasn’t interested in anyone else. We saw a clip where Emily told Gina that Heather needed a change of address card that said Tamra’s ass. Gina said she was pissed about to Heather throwing her under the bus in Montana, and looking back, she wondered if Heather was her friend or not.

Tamra wasn’t sure if she wanted to go back to the table, but she did. Gina wondered if Heather was trying to manage the relationship between Shannon and Tamra, and she was getting left. Shannon wondered what they’d walked in on, and Heather told Gina that she had personal issues going on. Lauren filled Shannon in on the drama, and Tamra told Jenn that she was sorry about the napkin, but she was livid. In Jenn’s interview, she said, Tamra could take her napkin back and clean up her own mess. Gina said, Heather had hurt her feelings a couple of times, and Heather said it hadn’t been her intention and admitted she’d crossed the line with the Travis thing. In Gina’s interview, she said she was happy that Heather seemed to have heard her. All the personalized chopsticks and candles in world didn’t do anything if she wasn’t sure about the friendship. Heather got all dramatic over Terry texting her about David getting divorced, but Shannon already knew. Tamra pulled her chair over to hear the gossip better, and Shannon said, he filed on their anniversary. In Shannon’s interview, she said she’d heard rumblings that things weren’t going well, but her main concern was her own kids. In Taylor’s interview, she wondered when they’d have a girls dinner where there was actually food. The waiters were probably afraid to come to the table. The food did come, and Gina said she was glad they made it to dinner. One of the waiters flambéed wagyu steak at the table, but sadly, Tamra did not catch on fire.

Next time, a Slip N Slide; Vicki is back; Taylor tells Jenn that Tamra got the Ryan stories from Heather; and Shannon says her relationship is over if this is on the air.

🎢 Adding To the Confusion…

I guess they couldn’t hold her spot forever, but can we close the revolving door now? And what about Kristina? Are we done there?

🗽 Because I like to torture myself, I watched the new RHONY again. I guess what I’d expected that wasn’t delivered was more sophistication. What I got was juvenile. Too much behind the back petty talk and I’m better than you bullsh*t. I think Ramona’s antics were getting old, but the old RHONY cast had a certain level of NYC sophistication. They could have shown the Ramonacoaster the door and brought a few more Leahs in so we could go downtown more. And I don’t mean that as a euphemism. I mean like the Village and Soho. The old cast might have been drunker, but they were part of the fun of the city.

🪟 Closing the Drapes…

Stop in tomorrow for soap and freshly brewed tea. Until then, stay safe, stay using your utensils from the outside in, and stay actually working past things and not just overlooking them.