Tag Archives: Real Housewives

Apr19

April 19, 2017 – A Painting Conundrum, Tyler Tuesday & Beverly Hills Reunions On

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

We revisit Tracy’s unveiling of the clown picture. Tracy realizes that Larry wasn’t around during the fire drill. That’s because he was busy stealing the painting. He kisses it, and says that when Tracy tries to screw him out of a deal, she just ends up screwing herself. I’m not feeling the new Larry, and wish they’d bring back the previous actor.

Jake sees Franco at the hospital, and asks if he’s back to work. Franco says not yet, and finds out that Jake is there to see Andre. Franco shows him a picture of the latest drawing on the timeline, and asks if he knows how it got into his studio.

At the docks, Jason tells Sam that Julian is desperate to get out of town. Sam wonders what Julian would do to Alexis if she ran into him. Well…

Alexis and Julian are getting busy.

Tracy says every time Larry darkens her doorstep, she has to pay, and he’s not getting away with it. The others agree, and split up to look for Larry.

Jake insists he didn’t draw on the timeline, and it must have been one of his brothers. Franco wonders which one could have gotten into his studio. He asks who Jake thinks the boy in the picture is, and he says he doesn’t know. Franco asks if there’s anything he wants to talk about. Jake tells him not to tell anyone, especially his parents. Elizabeth comes up the stairs, telling Jake not to run off like that.

Jason finds Hooper on the docks. He says that he and Sam have some questions.

Alexis tells Julian that when she turned around on the bridge, he was gone. He says Olivia-J shot him, but even though it bled a lot, it wasn’t serious. He was the phantom stalking her, and apologizes for scaring her. She says she read the letter. He wishes he hadn’t taken so long to tell her the truth. He tells her that he’s sorry. She says she thought he was gone. He says he’s here now, and he’s never going to leave her.

On the grounds of the Quartermaine estate, Larry talks to someone on the phone about storing the painting. He literally runs into a strange girl, and drops it. It’s the girl from the monastery, and he asks who she is. Ned, Laura, and Dillon run up. Larry blames the girl for stealing the painting, but they don’t buy it. Ned grabs Larry, and the painting, and gives him the bum’s rush back to the house.

Laura thanks the girl for stopping Larry. She introduces herself as Samira Adine, and Laura asks what brought her there. She’s there to see Tracy.

Tracy tells Larry he’s despicable. Larry says that he at least deserves a finder’s fee, and Tracy says he’s lucky she’s not calling the police. Tracy says where were we, and Monica says hogging the happy couple’s spotlight. Tracy unveils the real painting. She says it was painted by a renaissance painter, and Monica apologizes, saying it’s beautiful. Ned says the resemblance is striking. He tells Tracy that her father loved her.

Elizabeth tells Jake that he’s not in trouble, but Andre is waiting for him, and he leaves. She tells Franco she doesn’t know if she’s doing the right thing. Whenever she tries to get Jake to open up about the island, he pulls away. She’d feel less useless as a mother if she knew what she was doing was right. Franco shows her the picture of the timeline and what Jake added.

Hooper tells Sam and Jason that if he sells out clients, he’s out of business. Jason says if Sonny gets mad, he’ll be out of business. Sam tells him that they’re good friends with Sonny, and asks why he was meeting Julian.

Alexis thought Hooper was helping Julian, and Julian says that was the plan. He wondered what she’d do if she found out he was alive, and now he knows. He thought they might still have a future. She tells him that he can’t stay in Port Charles. He suggests running away together. They’ll get word back eventually, and the kids will understand. They can start over. No right side or wrong side; just the two of them together. Alexis says he misunderstood what happened tonight. It’s not a fresh start. It’s good-by.

Hooper tells Jason and Sam that Julian never showed up. Sam asks if there was a woman with Julian when Hooper met with him, but Hooper says no. He tells them that if Julian makes contact, he’ll call. He leaves, and Jason tells Sam that if Alexis went with him, it was probably willingly.

Alexis says she understands why Julian has to disappear, but she’s not going. He says they love each other, and she says he held a knife to her throat. I hate when that happens. It’s such a buzzkill.  Julian says it’s the biggest regret of his life, and she knows why he did it. Alexis says that she knows how she felt, and can’t get past it. She says it’s not just about Olivia-J forcing him to do her bidding; it’s what he did before that. She asks if it was his intention to hurt Duke and Carrrlos. Julian says he loves her, and she tells him it doesn’t mean anything; there are two sides to him. He tells her that they both would stand by her, which is a pretty clever comeback. She says it’s only a matter of time before someone else gets hurt, and she’s not doing it. He says it wasn’t all bad, and she says it wasn’t, but it was built on the hope that the better side of him would win. He asks about tonight. She says she just wanted to remember. He promises it can always be like that, but she says he can’t promise that. She needs closure, and needs him to give it to her.

Tracy tells Ned to get Larry out. Tracy asks Monica if she can replace the wall-hanging now, but Monica thinks the painting should go in the front hall. Laura and Samira come in, and Ned says Samira is the one who caught Larry. Samira says she’s traveled a long way from Turkey to see Tracy. Tracy wonders how Samira tracked her down, and Samira says the monks gave her the information. The painting has to be returned. Tracy says she explained everything to the monks, and she’s willing to make another donation, but she’s not parting with the painting. Samira says her daughter’s life depends on it.

Franco tells Elizabeth what Jake said about the timeline. She says it’s obviously something he witnessed. Franco isn’t sure if it’s literal. Elizabeth thanks him, and says she’ll talk to Andre. Jake sees them hugging. Franco has the phone in his hand, and Jake asks if he showed Elizabeth his picture. Franco says she needs to know, and Jake runs away.

Sam tells Jason that she doesn’t think finding the scarf is an accident, and isn’t going to allow history to keep repeating. The only way to keep Julian away is to find him and send him to prison. Sam remembers an app she has that tracks down friends, and finds Alexis’s location. She says they have to call the police.

Julian tells Alexis that the only life worth living is one with her in it. She says she wishes she could say the same thing. Her feelings re powerful, and he caused so much heartache. She doesn’t want any more pain, and it’s the only place this will lead. He says he loves her, and he’ll honor her wishes. He’s leaving town, and he’ll never see her again. He asks her to just give him tonight, and they start getting busy again.

Larry tells Ned that all’s right with the world. Ned says hardly. Larry swiped the painting like it was a piece of jewelry he could pawn. Larry suggests they not discuss it in mixed company, since Olivia-F is with Ned. Ned says Olivia is his family, which is more than he can say for Larry. Larry wants to let bygones be bygones. He says Tracy will forget about it; she’s used to his schemes, and it’s no reason to kick him out. Ned says he’s no longer welcome, and he’s disinvited to the wedding. Larry says he’s not going anywhere, and sooner or later Ned will miss him. Ned doubts it.

Tracy asks Samira for ID. She says it looks correct, but could have been forged. Laura looks at the emergency visa. She notes that it’s for Virginia. Samira explains that some refugees helped her. She tells them about men kidnapping her daughter. Dillon thinks it sounds like human trafficking. Laura realizes that Samira was the one who was crying at the monastery. Samira says that she went to the monks for help, and they wanted to use the painting to bargain.

Dillon wants Tracy to give her the painting. Tracy wants to think about it because she’s hesitant to believe the story. Monica says if the monks believe the story, maybe they can just give them the money. Tracy says they could all end up in jail. Samira says if she took the painting, no money would change hands.

Ned tells Olivia-F that he wonders how he sprang from the same gene pool as Larry. She says good parenting has nothing to do with DNA, and he proves that with Leo. Ned says with Julian gone, he wants to be there for Leo. He asks if the offer is still on the table to adopt Leo. It is.

Alexis has to leave. Julian tells her to take care of Sam and Lucas, and to take care of herself. A lot of people love her, and if she wants a drink, call them. She tells him to be careful. They’re about to kiss, and the police bust in, along with Jason and Sam.

Tracy says that customs knows she has the painting. If it ends up as currency, she’ll get in trouble. She suggests Laura get ahold of Robert, and find out the details. Monica says they’ll get some food and make up a room for Samira. Laura says she’ll call Robert, but she thinks Samira is telling the truth, and Tracy might be the only one who can help.

Elizabeth and Franco can’t find Jake. Elizabeth says this is how it started. Franco tells her to check Andre’s office. He sees sneakers next to a cart, and finds Jake hiding. Jake tells him to go away. Franco says he gets it; he wouldn’t want to talk to him either, but his mom is worried. Jake doesn’t want them knowing anything else about the scarecrow.

Julian says Alexis is his hostage. BTW, this place is called the Rendezvous Motel. Very classy. Julian is arrested. He and Alexis stare at each other.

Samira asks Tracy to believe her. Tracy says painting means a lot to her. Samira shows her a journal and a ring. Tracy says her father had a ring like this. She opens the journal, and sees Edward’s handwriting. She finds a picture of Lila. She asks where Samira got this. Samira says she got them from her mother. Tracy’s father left them to her, as they’d been friends. She says she’s telling the truth. Monica takes her upstairs.

Tracy talks to the painting like it’s Edward. She says, she has blue eyes, and not to do this to her.

Tomorrow, Hayden can’t make any promises, Tracy isn’t giving up her father’s legacy, and Michael tells Sonny to leave Port Charles.

If Loving You is Wrong

Kelly finds out that Justice is in the car with Travis. She tells her assistant to call the police. Doesn’t that kid have a GPS on his phone? Kelly wants to talk to Travis, who tells her it’s illegal to talk on the phone and drive. She asks where he’s taking Justice, but he pretends like he can’t hear her. He tells her he’s hanging up, and that Justice loves her.

Kelly gets on the phone with Officer Rick. She tells him that Travis has her son. Rick takes down whatever information she has, which isn’t much. He gives another officer the phone number, and has him run a trace on Justice’s phone. Kelly keeps repeating, “Why is he doing this?”

Rick puts an APB out on Travis’s car. Esperanza asks what’s going on. Kelly calls her and tells her about Travis taking Justice. Esperanza says she’ll call her back. I don’t blame Esperanza for being frustrated all the time when she has to find out what emergencies are going on from neighbors. Kelly tries to get Justice back on the phone, but gets voicemail. Justice asks Travis where they are. Kelly tries calling him, but call, rinse, repeat.

Brad pretends to work. Eddie strolls in. He asks if Alex told him what happened before he got there. Brad says no, and Eddie says he has to hear it. He tells Brad about finding Alex with Andrew, and how she took off in the squad car. He claims he did everything he could to stop her. He wonders why Brad saved the baby, and Brad says it’s an innocent baby. Eddie says it’s a disgrace to him. He can’t figure out what’s going on, and Brad says that’s because he doesn’t have a heart. Eddie says Brad is his best friend and he can help him. They have Alex where they want her. If he spills the beans, she’ll go to jail. Brad can make her do anything he wants. Brad says he’s had enough. Eddie tells him it’s no time to get soft, but Brad says he’s done with it. He tells Eddie that Alex has suffered enough, and he’s done. Eddie says what about Brad’s suffering, and Brad tells him to leave. Eddie says he’ll go, but the soldier he knew wouldn’t let himself become a mockery. When his best friend comes back, call, but until then, he’s out.

Marcie brings flowers to Louise. She asks what the doctor said, and Louise says she’s under observation. Marcie wants Louise out of there, and Louise wants out too. They hug, and Louise thinks Marcie has a temperature. Marcie says she’s fine. They talk about Randal. Marcie says she stayed as far away as possible, but Louise says her heart didn’t. Marci calls Randal a bully, and says she wants nothing to do with him. She can love and worry about him, but not like him.

She starts to tell Louise something, and Randal comes in. He tells Louise how angry he is with Alex. Louise tells him to say hello to Marcie. Marcie wants to go; she says she can’t breathe. He asks if she’s sucking all the air out of Brad, and she says every chance she gets. She tells Louise she’ll be back. Randal calls her a slut, and she says she’s using the tricks he taught her. She leaves, and Louise tries to chastise Randal, but he doesn’t want to hear it.

Randal tells Louise that Alex said the child wasn’t his. Louise asks if he’s sure it is. Randal says Alex told the judge that she had multiple partners. Louise says, chalk one up for the white girl. Ha-ha! She says if a woman will cheat on her husband, why wouldn’t she cheat on her boyfriend? Randal insists it was only him, and that’s his son. Louise tells him that Alex let her see the baby, and tells Randal about talking to Alex. She says he could be Randal’s son, and Randal says no way he’s not. Louise thinks it’s foolish and naïve for Randal to think he’s the only one. He says the only other Black man that Alex knows is the mailman. Louise says it wouldn’t be the first time a housewife hooked up with a mailman, and Randal says he’s like, 200 years old.

Randal asks what Marcie wanted, and Louise says he ran her out before she could say. He asks if he can get Louise anything. She says peace, quiet, and time alone. She tells Randal he wears her out, and to go home. She tells him to check on the mailman. Ha-ha! I love Louise.

Diane shows up at Kelly’s office while she’s on the phone. Kelly says now is not the time. Diane wonders how she’s working around money, considering her past, and asks if they know her background. Kelly says she can’t afford to lose her job, and Diane suggests they talk then. Kelly asks Diane what she wants. Diane wants a key, since her son is getting out soon. Kelly says she needs time to talk to her son and explain things. Diane offers to talk to him, and Kelly wigs out a little bit. Diane asks if Kelly knows what it’s like to not know where her son is and what he’s doing. Kelly says more than Diane knows. Diane asks if Kelly understands about a mother wanting to protect her son. She wants the key. Kelly gives it to her.

Joey wants out of the hospital. Natalie is surprised he hasn’t been kicked out, but doesn’t think he’s ready to go. She says he’s barely walking, and will need rehab. He says he can walk and she asks him to show her. He can’t, and she says he’s not some superhero. He says he will be getting out. Natalie tells him that he has physical therapy today.

There’s a knock at the door. It’s Mr. Kim. Joey asks about Faun, and he says she’s home and healing. Natalie says she knows he’s upset that they were together, but he says he’s not. He thanks Joey for saving her life. He says if Joey hadn’t had a gun, he doesn’t know what would have happened. He owes Joey. Joey says another guy is dead because of him. Mr., Kim offers Joey his job back, and leaves them to their family time.

Joey says that was crazy. Natalie says she’ll be back. She sees Mr. Kim in the hallway. She asks if he paid Joey’s hospital bills. He didn’t, and she’s wondering why they’re letting Joey stay there when they have no insurance. Mr. Kim is surprised they don’t have any, because he’s under the mistaken impression that it’s actually affordable. Natalie goes back into Joey’s room, and Joey asks what she said to Mr. Kim. She’s saved by the phone ringing. Lushion says he needs her help. He tells her to come to the house. She says she’s on her way. She tells Joey to try to walk.

Alex burns dinner. She tells the kids she’ll take them out. They ask how they’re getting there, and she says she’ll call a cab. Peter asks where the car is, and she says she had an accident. Paisley asks about the baby, and she tells them to stop asking questions. She apologizes for being snippy. Paisley asks if she’s okay. She tells them to get ready, and tells Peter to ask Kelly if she can borrow her car. The kids go upstairs, and Alex cries.

Lushion stops by and asks if he can borrow candles. Alex invites him in, and creepy Randal watches from his porch. Lushion asks if everything is okay, and Alex says she burned dinner. She looks for the candles and gives him some really nice ombre ones. He says he wants to surprise Natalie, and tells Alex not to let her know. He says it feels good to borrow from neighbors. He says he knows what Alex is going through, and mentions Randal pressing charges. Alex asks if she can go to jail for what her parents did. Lushion says she had nothing to do with it…right? He asks if she saw Andrew, and she says he picked her up after she wrecked her car. Lushion asks if Andrew took her to her parents, but the kids come down and interrupt the conversation. Lushion says they can borrow his car, but Alex says they’ll just walk to the deli. Paisley says she doesn’t like deli food – like no kid ever said – and Alex says they’ll get some fresh air. Lushion thanks her and leaves. She follows with the kids. Creepy Randal is still in the same position he was when Lushion arrived, and quietly calls Alex a bitch.

Both Pete and Joey are in physical therapy. Pete is walking a little, and Joey says he needs a break. Pete introduces himself to Joey. They discover they were both shot. Pete says he was an innocent bystander, and Joey says he’s a cop in Maxine. Pete plays along, asking Joey how long he’s been a cop, and Joey says years. Pete ask if he was shot in the line of duty. Joey makes up a story, saying his back-up was late. Pete asks who it was and Joey says a guy named Lushion. He says Lushion is way too old to be a cop, and was probably out getting doughnuts. Pete asks what he called in when he got shot. Joey says 187 and even I know that’s incorrect. Pete points that out.

Some cops bust in to arrest Joey for violating probation. They drag him out of his chair, saying he can go to the prison hospital. Joey is yelling, and the doctor tries to intervene, but they cart Joey away.

Next time, Randal confronts Alex, Kelley’s ex says that he loves her, and Alex comes on to Randal, totally creeping me out.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Reunion Part Two

We just jump right in. Erika says she didn’t like the way PK asked if she’s for sale. He’s defensive of Dorit, but Erika says her beef is with him. Andy says she’d claimed to be over it, and LisaV suggests having a sense of humor. A viewer asks if LisaV has forgiven Erika for her accusing her of sniping from the sidelines, and we see a clip of Erika talking to someone who’s no longer on the show, it was so long ago. Lisa says she thought Erika was relaxed with her nudity, and we flash back to some flashes. Kyle says it wasn’t funny because Erika wasn’t in on the joke. A viewer suggests Kyle could have intervened, and Kyle says she told Dorit she didn’t think it would go well. She and LisaV get in a small argument. They both talk at once, so who knows what it’s about? Kyle tells Lisa not to turn things around, and that she wasn’t there.

LisaR asks why Dorit doesn’t just apologize. Because LisaR only listens to herself. Dorit has apologized over and over. Andy says he was surprised that Erika didn’t tell Tom right away, and asks how she approached him about it. She says she explained how the story was going to pan out, and he gets it, which doesn’t surprise me in the least. Erika implies that Dorit drug her through the mud. Andy asks PK how he felt about LisaR asking if Dorit trusted him, but he just rolled with it. Lisa says she’s sorry for that. PK apologizes for the joke he made, but says he doesn’t owe an apology to Tom.

Dorit says she doesn’t know how many times she can say sorry. Erika says she wasn’t the one who wouldn’t let it go. Dorit says everyone was still joking about it. She points out that Andy just did when they sat down. PK says he’s heard all their insults, and all he did was make a bad joke. Please, PK, don’t say it’s not like you killed her child.

Since he can’t leave it alone, Andy brings up PK saying that Erika should concentrate on the deep-rooted problems in her marriage. Erika says he doesn’t even know her, but LisaR keeps interjecting, and PK says he seems to be discussing Erika with Lisa. Lisa says that he claimed she was unhinged and maybe had a drug problem. He says his first experience with her was at a dinner he thought went fabulous, and he can’t believe she could leave such a great evening, then say there were bad intentions. Lisa deflects, saying that Dorit didn’t remember the conversation they had about Eileen’s father passing away. Huh? Andy interjects, asking why Lisa said that the people at dinner left to “blow some rails.” I guess he thinks he sounds hip. Lisa says she’d gotten to a point that she’d had it with the Xanax thing. Dorit says she never said Lisa had a problem, but Lisa went after her with a preposterous accusation. PK says he’s never done coke, and the suggestion was ridiculous. LisaV says it’s a damaging thing to say, and thinks it was just retaliation. LisaR insists that’s what she observed. PK says you don’t have to be honest, if it’s not factual, which is another way of saying what I always do, that these women tend to hide their animosity behind the guise of honesty. Andy says fake news is all the rage. Because he’s so Andy.

LisaR talks about the inappropriate stuff said by PK after the confrontation at LisaV’s party, and that he should have let it go. PK admits that they were being naughty. Dorit came back distraught, and he felt that the mean girls had bullied his wife. His emotions were running high, and he’d had a few drinks. I’m with him here. Both he and Ken were inappropriate, but they were just letting off steam privately. LisaR says if she’d said something, it would be different, and PK says that she’s said a million things that she’s apologized for. There’s no question that he was upset. He says that he did walk away from the confrontation, because none of the other husbands were there, and Dorit says Erika is the one who invited him into the conversation.

PK tells Erika she’s not nice, and she tells him to get the f out of here. She says it’s easy to apologize in hindsight, and it’s fine. Andy asks if it really is, and she says they have to start over and they’ll see.

We see a montage of the Beverly Hills double air kiss greeting, which is also a chance to look over some past fashion. Kyle says she was sometimes embarrassed by the hellos. We see the various careers and projects the women have going on. Erika hits the nail on the head saying, busy girls. They talk about Erika performing at Christina Aguilera’s birthday party. Everyone promotes their whatever. We find out Kyle’s show was picked up, but she won’t be on it personally. Erika is also coming back to The Young and the Restless. Erika was partly named after Erika Kane from All My Children, and we see part of a talk show interview where she met Susan Lucci. Dorit talks about the many businesses that she and PK are involved with. She’s encouraged by the other women to continue with designing clothing, and having her own thing going apart from PK.

Kim and Eden join the group. We see a picture of Kim’s grandson, who’s wearing one of those terrycloth hoodies with animal ears and looks adorable. We also see a picture of Kim on a date with Donald Trump. Andy suggests Kim could have been the First Lady, but she doesn’t want to talk about it. We flash back to scenes with Eden. We see many awkward hugs. Even Eden has to laugh. She’s wearing some fabulous fringe earrings that I probably can’t afford, and explains about the long hugs breaking the introduction energy, and that sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.

LisaV talks about having known Vidal Sassoon, but says she’d never met Eden. I remember liking his jean brand. Eden has been busy on Twitter shading Kyle. Eden says in watching the show, she saw how mean Kyle was. Kyle asks her to put herself in her shoes. She thought they were cool, then Eden said she was cold and distant in her interview. She adds that Eden ambushed her with questions about alcoholism right off the bat.

Andy brings up Eden and LisaR becoming fast friends, and how that changed, and we see clips. Including the one where Lisa said that Kim was close to death. It’s all worth watching to see LisaV’s sparkly earrings when she told Kyle what Eden had said. Ooh, Eden’s ballerina outfit at LisaV’s party is pretty good too. Andy reads viewer questions. Eden explains that she was overwhelmed in meeting Kim, and couldn’t not stick her nose where it didn’t belong. She doesn’t say it quite like that, but that’s my translation. Andy asks what Eden thought was wrong, and Eden says she felt nervous energy. Kim suggests when she feels that, to respect people’s spaces. She says they could have been friends, but instead of going to the source, Eden just repeated what LisaR had said and badgered Kyle. Kim says that Eden shouldn’t have been taking her inventory, and Eden tells Kim not to tell her how to work a program. Well, if part of the program is not taking anyone else’s inventory, then Kim has a right to point that out.

Andy asks the million-dollar question – why the blip did LisaR say what she did about Kim not being sober and close to death? Kim suggests that she doesn’t remember. Lisa says it was after game night. We flash back to their tiff. Kim says that Lisa lies, cries, and denies, and that it was unbelievable to watch. She says that Lisa has a huge heart, and she does like being around her. Lisa says they’ve made amends since then, and have moved on. Kim has big hopes. Andy asks about the bunny that Lisa gifted Kim’s grandson with. Here’s where it gets confusing.

Kim has brought said bunny, still in the wrapper. She didn’t give it to her grandson, because she didn’t feel that it had good energy. She gives it back to LisaR, and tells her when she’s in a better place, maybe she can give it back to her. This is the stupidest, meanest thing ever. Kim says she’s all about energy and being positive. Eden asks if she wants a crystal for healing, and Kim says she is healed. Kim says that Lisa might be better off giving it to someone else. Lisa starts crying, and Eileen wonders why Kim chose to do this at the reunion. Kim says she doesn’t know what’s real and what’s not with LisaR. Andy asks Lisa what she’s thinking. She says she doesn’t need to say anything; she gets it loud and clear. Andy is confused, since he thought they were in a good place, but Kim says she doesn’t know if she’s ready to be Lisa’s friend. Lisa says it’s okay. She’s forgiven herself, and she’s okay with that. Kyle interjects that Kim is like that, but she sees why Lisa feels badly. Lisa says Harry thought it was a good idea to give Kim the gift, even though she had second thoughts. Kim says maybe it’s good that she feels badly, since she hurt Kim.

LisaR says she has to leave the stage for a moment. Eileen follows. Eileen says that it was a calculated move, trying to demean and hurt Lisa, when Lisa was just being nice. Lisa says she’s good because she has a good life. They regroup.

Dorit says it’s not like LisaR is just the victim. Kyle tells Kim to go back and explain to LisaR how superstitious she is. Yeah. More like yearning for attention. LisaR is an idiot, but this is nasty.

Eileen says it just shows where she’s at, and LisaR says Kim showed her true colors.

Kim goes backstage with the bunny. It’s like some bizarro world version of Fatal Attraction.

Next time – the Reunion, part three – Dorit tells LisaR she has a big mouth, the bag of pills is revealed, and Kim accuses Eileen of making faces (like no one else does that). If anyone deserve a four-part reunion, it’s these girls, but I think that three is it with this one.

 

 

 

Apr17

April 16, 2017 – A Curse is Lifted, Suicide Squad is Okay by Me, Potomac Goes to the Races & Atlanta Reunites

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

Once Upon a Time

In Neverland, the Lost Boys chase Hook. He slides down a hill and is surrounded. He says he has treasure and rum, but they want him to pay for what happened to Peter Pan. All of a sudden, the boys drop like flies. Tiger Lily is in the shadows with a blowgun, and reveals herself. She says she never expected to see Hook back again, and he says it wasn’t planned. He thanks her for the rescue, and she pokes him in the neck with a dart.

David tells Emma they never would have put her in the wardrobe if they’d known all this was going to happen. Henry tells her it’s going to be okay, and she says she knows. David tells Regina that the story can’t end like this; Emma can’t go into the final battle without her family. Regina says she’ll have to make do with just one of them. She’s working on breaking the curse, but it might be dangerous or life-threatening. David says whatever she has, it has to work. It’s not like it’s their first time. We flash back to a few other curses the Evil Queen has laid on them.

Snow/Mary strolls through parallel Storybrooke, but everyone is in bad moods. Archie claims Pongo is off gluten. She runs into Regina, and asks if there’s any news about a John Doe in the hospital. Regina says it looks like he may never wake up. Snow ditches the flowers she was bringing to the hospital, and sees a bloom through the cracks of the sidewalk.

Snow brings the flower to David. It makes purple sparkles in the air. The machine he’s attached to goes off, and he opens his eyes. He struggles to get out of bed, asking where the Evil Queen is. He says the guards stabbed him, and the curse brought them there. He tells “Mary” that Snow White is in there somewhere, and somewhere inside, she knows he loves her. She takes his hand, and calls him Charming.

In regular Storybrooke, Snow tells Regina that they have to do this now. Regina says it’s going to hurt. Zelena and Regina take the combined heart of Snow and sleeping David, and put the halves into a potion. When the hearts are done basting, the witches return them, but Snow keels over. Zelena says the magic weakened the hearts. A revived Snow says that Emma will have to fight the final battle without them.

At the parallel hospital, David asks for Grumpy’s help. Snow tells Grumpy (calling him Leroy) to pay no attention to this mental patient she found wandering around. Snow tells David that it’s called a curse for a reason, and everyone else doesn’t know about it. She gives him clothing to change into. He says he put Emma in the wardrobe, so she must be there too. She suggests they find Gold, and tells him to meet her at an abandoned farmhouse in an hour. Snow tells Regina that David was sleepwalking and headed into the woods.

In standard Storybrooke, David shows Emma a video Snow left. She says they have to work together. David tells Emma that her mother found a way to break the curse, but didn’t know it. He shows them a picture of some flower petals, and Zelena recognizes them as pixie petals. She tells them that the enemy is already there.

The Black Fairy shows up at Gold’s shop along with Gideon. Gold says Gideon concocted a ruse to bring the fairy there, and Gideon says that one day he might understand. Belle comes out from the back, and tells Gideon he can still come back to them. Gold tries to make magic, but the fairy stops him with the dagger. She says she practically invented dark magic, but she won’t force him to do anything. When he joins them, it will be because he wants to, and then they can be the family they were meant to be. She and Gideon disappear, poof! in a puff of silver smoke.

In strange Storybrooke, David goes to Gold’s shop. He doesn’t think Gold is under the curse, and wants to know where Emma is. Gold doesn’t know what he’s talking about. David says they’ll have to find Emma on their own, but Gold says maybe he can help. Hearing Emma’s name was the appropriate wake-up call, and now he gets what’s going on. David knows that Emma is destined to break the curse, but doesn’t know where she is. Gold tells him that the pixie dust can reunite anyone who shares true love.

Back in the sort of real world, David says they need Snow’s tracking skills to find the flower, so he has to go to sleep. He knows Hook is out there fighting for Emma too.

Tiger Lily smacks Hook awake. He’s tied up in a cave. He says someone’s life is depending on him getting out of there, but Tiger Lily needs him to deliver something to another realm. He says his love is in danger. She doesn’t believe he could possibly fall in love. She shows him a piece of driftwood and says it’s really a weapon, and the only chance of winning the coming war. He says it’s not their war, but she says there’s a great darkness on the horizon, and the Savior will die without it. He says that’s the woman he loves, and tells her to look in his pocket. She takes out the ring. Tiger Lily says the Black Fairy is in Storybrooke, and this is the Savior’s only hope to defeat her. Hook asks if she has any magic, and she says Pan might, but the Lost Boys outnumber them. He says they don’t stand a chance.

No one can find David in sleeping Storybrooke. Snow says they haven’t looked everywhere in the woods. Regina suggests Archie and Pongo check the mines. When they’re out of sight, Regina reveals an electrical box. She says the tunnel is rigged for demolition; one push it all comes down. She says Snow and John Doe are both awake, which means the curse isn’t working. Snow/Mary claims she was just doing her rounds at the hospital. Regina says Snow is a hero, who would never let the cricket die, but Mary has never stood up to her. She asks what it’s going to be. Snow clutches a pair scissors. The townspeople arrive, and Regina backs off of the box. Snow disappears.

Sliding sideways, Snow and Emma find a small field of pixie dust flowers. Snow says they grow in the presence of evil. The Black Fairy appears, and says she’s been waiting to meet Emma. They’ve been destined to clash since the beginning of time. Gideon joins them. Emma asks if this is it, and the Black Fairy says everyone will know when the final battle begins. Gideon makes the flowers disappear. Emma shoots an arrow at the Black Fairy and Gideon, but they both disappear, poof! in a puff of black smoke.

Tiger Lily explains to Hook that the weapon is what banished Black Fairy to the realm where she was trapped, and that she was once a fairy. Hook asks why she gave it up, like it was tennis or something. She says she failed in stopping the Black Fairy, so she hung up her wings, and took refuge in Neverland. She points out a tree that contains the sap Hook needs to find Emma. The Lost Boys are having a Burning Man Festival, and Tiger Lily shoots an arrow at them. They run after her. Hook hooks the tree and gets the sap. One of the boys sees him, and sounds an alarm. Hook gives his own shadow the driftwood to give to Emma. He drops down into a cluster of the Boys.

David and Snow meet at the farmhouse in parallel Storybrooke. She says Regina is on to them, and gives him the flower. Gold shows up. He says they’re awake, but everyone else asleep. Gold tells David that if they find Emma now, the curse won’t be broken, and everyone will stay asleep. He gives them a vial, and says it will put David and Snow back to sleep, and make everything right again. He says the potion is the only way forward.

In real Storybrooke, Emma knows she can’t change her destiny, and tells Snow it’s not their fault. Snow says there’s something she doesn’t know. They see a pixie dust flower peeking out from the snow.

In snoozing Storybrooke, Snow sprinkles the pixie dust into her hand. David tells her to think about Emma and let the magic do the rest. She throws the dust in the air, and a door appears. David opens it. They see young Emma in her bedroom, reading. Snow says if they go through the door, she won’t be the Savior. David tells her that Emma will have new destiny with them. Snow remembers that Regina said Snow is a hero who wouldn’t let anyone suffer to get what she wants, and she’s right. She can’t sacrifice everyone else’s happiness for her daughter. She says everyone is separated from those they love, and they can’t sentence them to that forever. They have to believe that Emma strong enough to grow up without them. David wishes she wasn’t right. Snow tells Emma that they’ll see her again, and closes the door.

She tells David there isn’t much time, and starts to cry. She didn’t think they’d be saying good-by so soon. He says he’ll always find her. She says one day, Emma will find them. They kiss. He drinks the potion, and falls asleep. Then Snow drinks it.

Regina messes with the pixie dust in original Storybrooke. She gives it to Snow, and Hook’s shadow flies in, and gives her the weapon. She asks where Hook is, and the shadow drops his hook at her feet. She says there’s something wrong, and asks where he is again. The show touches her cheek and disappears. Henry says they’ll find him. She says they don’t know where he is. Snow says the magic can open the door to Hook, and explains how they used it in the past. Emma says they had to do what was right for everyone else. Snow says today she’s putting Emma first. She says they can’t allow Hook to be taken, after they’ve already taken so much. Not before the final battle.

The Lost Boys sentence hook to death for his crimes against Peter Pan. The door appears, and Emma pops out. She and Tiger Lily kick ass. Emma and Hook go through the door and Tiger Lily jets.

Emma gets Hook back to Storybrooke, and says she got his message. He says he should never have run away, but she says tells him that she didn’t make it easy. He says there’s something he has to do before he gets pushed to another portal. He takes out the ring and proposes. He says he’ll always be by her side. She says no. Just kidding. She says yes, and they kiss. He puts the ring on her finger. He says it’s time he faced her father, but David is asleep. Emma explains that they went into a sleeping curse so she could save him.

Regina says there might be another way, but it’s risky.

Everyone gathers together. Regina says once Snow and Charming had a chance to find their own happiness, they chose the good of everyone there. She wants the people to do something for them now. She shows them a chalice, and says if they share the curse, they might dilute its power. Hook takes a sip; then Regina and Emma. The chalice is passed around. Grumpy says he could use a nap. These people are taking some pretty big sips. It must be an endless cup.

Snow and David’s eyes open. They hug and kiss. He says she did it, and she says she didn’t do anything. They find Hook and Emma asleep, but they slowly wake up, along with everyone else. Hook asks if Emma told David his secret. David says Hook is a changed man now, and they’ve all seen it, and everyone is all happy. Regina says it wouldn’t have worked if Snow hadn’t inspired them – she gave up her family. Snow says she did it for a better one, and they’ll defeat the Black Fairy. She tells Emma that she won’t be facing the fairy alone.

Gold meets the Black Fairy. He asks why she gave the dagger back to him. She tells him that he has to choose to be part of this family. He says she has Gideon’s heart, and tells her about Gideon keeping the flower alive as a way of resisting her. He has his mother in him. Gold says he’ll get Gideon’s heart back. The Black Fairy tells him that if he comes at her, there might be nothing left of the town when they’re done. He says he’s willing to pay that price.

Next time, Zelena isn’t afraid of the Black Fairy and vows to kills her, and an ultimate sacrifice will be made.

💣 Suicide Squad

Although I’d wanted to see Suicide Squad in the movies, it never happened. I really shouldn’t complain, since I have 500+ FIOS channels that I pay dearly for, and probably should watch something other than BRAVO. From what I’d read, this film was panned by the critics, but I enjoyed it a lot.

As a kid, I read both the Superman and Batman comics, as well as some other random ones. Doom Patrol was, and remains, my favorite. By the time these characters came along, my comic reading days were long gone. Out of the Squad members, Harley Quinn got high marks, as she brought to mind another favorite from back in the day, Batman’s Poison Ivy. When my friends and I used to act out our comic books – what do you expect from someone who started The Rocky Horror Picture Show cult? – I was always Poison Ivy. Since I’m not part of today’s comic scene, I had no expectations, which might have made a difference in my perception. I had no reference material to compare this with.

The plot was okay. It dragged in spots, and the whole Enchantress business isn’t exactly my thing, but while plot can be a plus, that’s not my reason for watching an action picture. I’m there for the action, colorful characters, and maybe a few good one-liners. On that, the movie delivered.

I also liked the subplot of Deadshot’s relationship with his daughter, and thought Will Smith’s performance was excellent. The costumes, the explosions, the effects – it was all good. And the soundtrack was fabulous. There was a lot of noise about the Joker not being in it all that much, compared to his presence in the previews, but I thought it was just enough. Jared Leto’s portrayal was so over-the-top, any more of it would have been overkill. I’d also heard that he took his Joker persona into his off-time on set, which gave it an extra eww! for me, since I find actors who do that rather creepy.

It’s on rotation on HBO now. If you’re paying for it, might as well watch it. It’s a lot of fun and you could do worse.

🏛 On tonight’s The Real Housewives of Potomac, the ladies went to the Preakness, and of course wore hats. I went to the Belmont Stakes once. I’d never been to the racetrack before, and was surprised that a race takes about two seconds. I didn’t wear a hat, and I didn’t win anything, except a drunk guy trying to pick me up outside of the ladies room. True story. Ashley is finding out that the restaurant business isn’t as easy as she thought, like every single restaurant owner on Kitchen Nightmares. Charisse is having some renovations done on her house, and I have to admit that I sometimes wonder what it’s like to be wealthy enough to be able to add a “fierce champagne room” to my home.

🍑 The excruciatingly long, four-part The Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion has begun. The women all look gorgeous, although I’m not loving Porsha’s dress. It looks like she’s wearing a kimono ten sizes too big for her. A sparkly kimono. Sheree also keeps pulling up the top of her strapless number. Is she wearing She by Sheree? Although dumb as a post, Porsha got my vote for quote of the night: Andy…he’s messy. Out of the mouths of stupid. Things didn’t start escalating until almost the end, when Kandi and Porsha started to get into it. Most of the show was nonsense talk, but it looks like Porsha will be the one walking off this reunion. Probably not next week. I’m guessing that’s the carrot being dangled to get us to watch all four parts.

Apr13

April 12, 2017 – Anna Gifts Valentin, Sonja has a Mad Hatter Party & Bette is Still Feuding with Joan

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Anna leaves a note for Valentin saying she doesn’t want to be his enemy, and maybe they’ll learn that time heals all wounds. She’s also included a free watch.

Anna’s doorbell rings. It’s Laura. She wants to talk about Valentin.

Valentin examines the watch. Nina wants him to zip up her dress, but he’s hiding the watch and note behind his back, so he can’t.

Tracy wants to exchange the wall-hanging in the den for the painting. She tells Monica that she acquired the perfect piece.

Hayden tells Curtis that Finn disappeared. Not totally. He’s passed out in an alleyway, and looks kind of bloody.

Nina asks Valentin if he has a present behind his back, but Valentin tells her no. Nina thinks he’s lying. He tells her she’ll be disappointed, and he shows her the note. I don’t know if “disappointed” is going to be the right word. Valentin says that Anna came by and surprised him. Nina wonders why he didn’t tell her. He flashes back to Anna saying that their night together meant something. Valentin says she wanted to put past behind them. Nina asks if he believes that, and he asks if she does.

Laura tells Anna about Lulu’s canceled visit with Charlotte, accusing Valentin of sabotage. She thinks Lulu is too emotional, and Valentin can easily exploit that. Anna says they’ve made peace.

Monica tells Tracy that it’s her house. Tracy tells her to take pride in it then, and hang something worthwhile. Ned comes in, and she tries to get him on her side. Monica tells Ned he’s in charge while she’s at work, and if the tapestry is missing, take Tracy to a hotel.

Tracy shows Ned the covered painting. He says Larry wasn’t pleased about her skipping town without him. He tells her that he and Olivia-F are engaged.

At the hospital, Andre says it looks like Brad got good news. Brad says a condo he and Lucas had their eye on is available.

Hayden tells Curtis that Finn’s room wasn’t used last night. He says he’ll lecture her later on about enabling, but right now he’ll look for Finn. And this one is on him. She promises to keep her lips to herself, and says she’ll leave that to Jordan. Jordan appears, and says lucky her.

Finn is in the hospital. Griff wants to do a neurological test. Finn says he can’t feel his face, and tries to analyze things, but Griff says let him do the doctoring. (Is doctoring a medical term?) He has Finn do some simple tests to check his motor skills. He asks if Finn knows how he sustained the injuries. Finn says not really. Griff asks if he wants to tell the police what happened.

Nina says she barely knows Anna, and doesn’t like her. Valentin says she seemed remorseful, but he doesn’t totally trust her. Nina is concerned about Lulu’s visit, and Valentin says Charlotte isn’t going anywhere; Lulu is a loose cannon, and it will sink her. He suggests they go out afterwards, and Nina says sounds like a plan. Nina leaves for work, and Valentin calls someone, saying he has a job for them.

Laura reminds Anna that she thought Valentin was out to get her, but Anna says he had his reasons. She says in her past, she did some things that could be considered treason, and Valentin was a victim. She had no memory of it, and was suppressing it because she didn’t want to deal with it. She met with a WSB specialist who restored her memories. Laura says memory is flawed, but Anna says she’s sure it happened. She can’t take it back, so she needs to make it right. Laura says that Valentin doesn’t deserve compassion and mercy; he’s a cold-blooded murderer, who kept her granddaughter from her. He might not have deserved the past, but he deserves what he’s getting now. Anna understands, but says her part in the war is over.

Ned tells Tracy to go ahead and tell him that he’s making a mistake, but it won’t change anything. Tracy asks if Olivia-F makes him happy. Ned says she does, and Tracy says she’s happy for him, and congrats.

Hayden explains to Jordan that she kissed Curtis, but he had nothing to do with it. Jordan jokes around, asking if he wants to press charges. Curtis tells Hayden they’ll talk later, and Hayden leaves. Curtis tells Jordan that he was being a friend and got a sneak attack. Jordan says he doesn’t owe her any explanations; they’re not exclusive. Curtis thinks they should change that.

Griff tells Finn that he’s lucky to be alive, and the police need to know about him getting beat up. He adds that Finn isn’t in rehab, and must have gone to the pier to score. Griff accuses him of being high right now.

Ned asks what Tracy has done with his mother, and if she had a spiritual metamorphosis in Turkey. She tells him that she found her father.

Brad talks to Monica about some lab ideas, but the presentation has been postponed. He says as long as it doesn’t affect his raise. Monica says as a matter-of-fact, it does

Finn says the cops will only cause more problems. Griff says the problem he has is fixable, if he has the guts to do it. In the hallway, Griff sees Hayden, and tells her that Finn is there. She goes into Finn’s room, where he’s trying to get out of bed.

Jordan and Curtis kiss. Andre sees them.

Valentin is at the docks, talking to someone on the phone about finding suspicious stuff. Laura comes by. She accosts Valentin, telling him that it’s selfish not doing what’s best for daughter. He says he’s providing loving family, and Charlotte will always choose him and Nina. Laura accuses him of trying to psyche her out, and says nothing is going to work. Wow, if she considers that a psyche out, nobody is trying very hard. She says there’s nothing wrong with her memory, so he can’t prey on her like he did Anna.

Nina goes to Anna’s place. She asks if they didn’t have a conversation where Anna was supposed to stay away from her husband. Anna says they did. Nina attacks her.

Hayden asks Finn what happened. He says it was a rough night. She asks if he used, and Griff says his bloodwork is clean. Finn tells them that he paid for the drugs and changed his mind, but found out the hard way that drug dealers don’t do refunds. Griff asks why he didn’t say something, but Finn didn’t want anyone to know how low he’d gone. He thought about what Hayden said, and that at the end of the road maybe there’s a better life, and someone to share it with.

Curtis sees Andre, and tells Jordan, to be continued. He leaves, and Jordan approaches Andre. It’s awkward. She tells him that she wouldn’t blame him for being angry. He says he knows he can’t make someone feel what they don’t want to, and tells her not to feel badly about what she wants.

Anna gets the better of Nina. Nina says that Anna pushed her there. Anna says she has no quarrel with her, and Nina asks what’s up with the letter. Anna says it’s a declaration of peace, and asks if Valentin even saw it. Nina says showed it to her because they’re honest with each other. Anna just wants to end the feud. Nina tells Anna that after months of harassment, admit she’s after Valentin.

Laura says obviously Anna is confused, thinking she committed some wrong against him. He says they know each other well. Laura says she’ll do whatever it takes to make him pay. She tells him that it’s clear that Charlotte and Nina genuinely love him, so there must be something decent in him and worth loving, but she doesn’t think he believes or trusts it. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have to cling to it. She tells him that he’s afraid when they see who he really is, they’ll abandon him. He stutters, and tells her to get away from him. She says with pleasure, but he’ll see her again…soon.

Ned reads Edward’s letter. He asks Tracy why it matters what he thinks if it makes her happy. She wants to know what he thinks is missing. Ned thinks it’s bull. Tracy asks if he thinks Edward was lying, and Ned hopes not, for her sake. Ned says Edward should have told her this his entire life. He expressed his feelings by controlling and manipulating, and held the family hostage. Ned says he saw Edward clearly for what he was, not bad, but not always good either. Tracy says he was complicated. Ned says everything he did was for his own ends, and he doled out affection to whoever paid proper reverence. To stay in his good graces, you had to toe the line, which left Tracy at odds with him or in exile. If she believed he loved her, she wouldn’t need a letter.

Nina says first Anna is after Valentin, and now she wants to be friends. Anna brings up Nina’s past, and says her feelings are understandable, but she’s being needlessly territorial. Anna wants no further conflict. Nina tells her says no more notes, no more anything. She leaves, and Anna laughs to herself.

Valentin meets with guy on the docks. He says he’s found nothing, and gives Valentin the watch. Valentin says that’s reassuring, and messes with the watch some more.

Monica tells Brad that’s the way things are at the moment. She hopes that Hayden will loosen the purse strings soon. Brad wonders what Hayden has to do with it, and Monica says she’s the hospital’s financial advisor. Brad twirls his proverbial mustache.

Finn tells Hayden and Griff that he’ll go to rehab. Griff says there’s an outpatient service in town that’s good, and discreet. Finn says it doesn’t matter. He has to own up to who he is and what he’s done. He’s an addict. He says Monica needs to hear it from him.

Brad asks Monica when Finn is coming back, and she assumes when he finishes his paper. Brad says there’s something she needs to know about Finn. What I’m assuming is that Brad is going to tell her about Finn’s addiction, but I don’t see how this would get him anywhere. Wouldn’t he be better off trying to blackmail Hayden with that information?

Ned isn’t saying that Edward didn’t love Tracy in his own way. Tracy says his way was fine. Ned says she spent her life chasing his love, when she should have been comforted by it and felt it when he was alive. It’s the kind of love she deserved. He says that he’s proud of her, of the person she’s become, and he loves her with all his heart. Tracy tears up and so do I. She cries on his shoulder.

Laura talks to Lulu on the phone, and asks if she wants the good or bad news first. She says the good news is that Valentin isn’t as confident as they think; and the bad news is that they can’t count on help from Anna any more.

Anna’s phone rings. It’s Andre, but she doesn’t answer.

Curtis joins Jordan again. She has to get to work. He says he’ll walk her there, and they’ll talk about the date she owes him.

Andre leaves a message that he could use a friend, and asks Anna to call him back. Anna is on the laptop and puts earbuds in.

Valentin puts the watch on. He smiles. We see Anna messing with the watch, and sewing a device into it. She hears Valentin and Nina talking. I just have to say it. That looked like something I could have easily found. You mean to tell me that Valentin’s guy noticed nothing?

Tomorrow, Andre asks Anna what she’s doing, Nina asks where Valentin got the watch, and Finn talks to Monica.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Sonja calls for chocolate. The doorbell rings. It’s new Wife, Tinsley. Sonja knows her from charities they’ve done together, and she’s going to be Sonja’s houseguest. You might know Tinsley from her arrest in the tabloids. Sonja tells her that she can stay as long as she wants. Tinsley doesn’t know whether she wants to live uptown or downtown.

It’s Halloween, and Bethenny tries on a sexy leopard costume. Carole arrives. Ramona joins them. Bethenny is surprised that Ramona didn’t acknowledge her dogs, and Ramona says Bethenny never sent her an announcement. Aww! They’re wearing pumpkin costumes. In her interview, Ramona thinks now that Bethenny has a boyfriend, she’s been ignoring her. Carole mentions her new kittens.

Carole asks if Ramona went to LuAnn’s bachelorette party, but she wasn’t invited. She tells them how LuAnn accused her of stirring the pot, and playing detective regarding Tom. They agree that LuAnn seems more than happy.

LuAnn has a Mad Hatter party to go to, so she goes with daughter Victoria to a millinery. While they try on hats, she tells Victoria about Sonja being stuck in the past. She thinks Sonja wishes that she was with Tom. We flash back to Sonja talking about her previous relationship with him. I’m thinking who didn’t have a relationship with Tom is probably a shorter list than who did.

Bethenny says that Sonja seems to be doing well. Ramona tells them about Tinsley moving in. She says Tinsley was a major socialite, and Bethenny brings up her stalking the ex-boyfriend. She says that Tinsley had the world at her fingertips, and crashed and burned. Carole is having an election night party, but Ramona says they’ll just argue. Carole wonders how that will be different from any other night. They talk about the Hillary email thing, because we will never, ever be able to get away from any of it for the rest of our natural born lives. And maybe even after that. I go ♫ La-la-la! ♫ Bethenny accuses Carole of being a know-it-all and elitist.

Back at Sonja’s place, Tinsley is excited about being back in New York. She’s anxious about regaining her life there. Sonja asks how she liked the play, and we see a clip of it. In her interview, Tinsley talks about her marriage to Topper Mortimer. I get a picture of Leo G. Carroll in my head. (Google it.) Sonja knows how it is to have everything golden, and then have it fall apart. Tinsley says she still wants kids, and has had her eggs frozen. They talk about criteria for a man, and Tinsley says he needs to have a job. Wow. For a socialite, she doesn’t ask for much. She talks about her relationship with the dude who called the cops on her. She thinks he was acting out because they weren’t going to be together. Tinsley says at least she had her lashes on in the mug shot, although her eyebrows were not on fleek.

Dorinda has invited Ramona to her cryotherapy session. Ramona shows up, but she’s dressed for a date, so she’s not actually partaking. She tells Dorinda about her lunch with LuAnn. She says she decided not to say anything about Tom. She says it’s obvious that LuAnn doesn’t want to know. I do though.

Dorinda talks about Sonja spreading lies about her, but Ramona says Sonja hasn’t said anything to her. In her interview, Dorinda says Sonja shouldn’t be saying anything about anybody, considering her colorful past, and she has to nip this in the bud. Dorinda goes into the freezing chamber or whatever you call it.

Tinsley has missed NYC. Yeah, me too. Worst. Idea. Ever. To. Move. She tells us about the Mortimers being one of the famous historical families there, and how you’re treated differently when you marry into one. She doesn’t have the invitations that she used to, but wants to be prepared, so she’s dress shopping. We see some of the fashion pages she’s been in, and she tries on this amazing formal dress with a delicate botanical pattern on it. She says it was almost the perfect life. She walked away, and she wants it back. Good luck with that after the mug shot thing.

Dorinda’s daughter Hannah is getting her own place, and they go furniture shopping. It takes three months for a couch delivery? Hannah says things are born, live, and die in that amount of time. Really. In her interview, Dorinda is glad Hannah is moving out before it turned into an Edie Beale situation. She’d be eating out of a tuna fish can, and Hannah would be wandering around in a ballerina outfit. Omg, that’s too funny.

Bethenny says that clutter is the devil incarnate. I tend to agree, although I’ve yet to conquer it. She sends a lot to Dress for Success. She talks to her assistant about her boyfriend, Dennis. She says it’s been difficult with the suckerfish Jason Hoppy stuff going on (I refuse to put his name in bold), and she’d like to be more engaged in her new relationship. She thought all that would be over by now. Like any normal person would think.

Sonja is getting ready for her Mad Hatter party. The dress code is, wear color. She tells us that’s how you set the tone for a party. She wants everything to be perfect, because she knows how the girls can be in picking at someone. She says that they want you to be successful, but not more successful than they are. Tinsley shows up wearing black. So much for the party’s tone.

Commercial break with horrifying information. The Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion will be in four parts. Here’s hoping that Porsha loses her sh*t again.

Ramona is also wearing black. She asks why Sonja didn’t invite Dorinda, and Sonja makes some vague comments about why should she? In her interview, she tells us it’s all about the Berkshires. Carole arrives, wearing black and white.

Bethenny is on her way. Wearing colors! But the friend she’s bringing is in black. What is wrong with these people? Ramona chatters away to Carole about not wanting to invite Sonja to her house because of her altercation with Dorinda. She was hoping they’d make up today. Inside, Tinsley instructs Sonja on applying lashes. Ramona is wearing a scarf (also black), and moves on to saying how much she likes hickeys. Bleh. Thanks for the visual. Carole talks about how informed she is about politics, and won’t hear that Ramona might also be informed. I might not think so in Ramona’s case either, but I have the feeling that’s how Carole feels about everyone else in the world.

Bethenny says she looks like a piñata at somebody’s funeral. HA-HA! Even Sonja is wearing a floral-patterned dress with a black background. Tinsley says she’s trying to be open to the new people she’s meeting, but she doesn’t get a friendly vibe from Bethenny. Has she seen the show? I’ll bet they watch it in jail. LuAnn is wearing color and a hat. She and Bethenny say hello, but the conversation is stilted.

Ramona asks if Tinsley is seeing anyone, and she says no, but it would be nice to be married again. They didn’t have children, only Chihuahuas, and Ramona asks if she regrets it. Tinsley says she’d still like to have them, and tells Ramona about the arrest. She feels the need to bring it up early on, before someone hears about it elsewhere. Ramona says she’s got balls.

LuAnn and Sonja sit inside to talk. LuAnn says she’s been reading negative things in the paper about herself that have come from Sonja. Apparently, she’s been saying that even if the marriage turns out to be a bust, she’ll be there for LuAnn. Somehow, Sonja turns the tables to talking about Ramona, and how she’s turning Dorinda against her. In her interview, LuAnn says Sonja is coming off like she’s jealous. LuAnn tells her to quit dwelling on the past. In her interview, Sonja says LuAnn only hears what she wants to hear. LuAnn tells Sonja that she’s happy, so back off.

Ramona says any relationship that ends, isn’t easy. Bethenny says she’s familiar with that. Yep. Bethenny asks about Dorinda. She thinks Sonja needs to drop the Berkshires, Tom and the townhouse. She tells Ramona that the invite said to wear the colors of Wonderland, and Ramona looks like she’s going to a funeral. A dressy funeral. NYC is the capital of black clothing, but since I always had pets, I rarely wore black. Mostly grey, so the car fur would just blend in. Oddly enough, I’m not a huge fan of black.

Tinsley says she falls in love easily and makes her men into projects. She tells them about the list Sonja is making for her. In her interview, Carole says Sonja isn’t the person she’d go to for man advice. Tinsley loved meeting Ramona and Carole, but feels Bethenny wasn’t receptive.

Sonja and Bethenny discuss what designer LuAnn is wearing. Sonja tells Bethenny that it’s Ralph Lauren, and Bethenny says she thought it was Laura Ashley. Sonja’s borrowed butler suggests Salvation Army, and Bethenny nearly chokes on her sandwich. She wants a bitchy borrowed butler, so they can talk about the gaucheness of things.

Next time, Sonja talks about LuAnn and Dorinda, Tinsley feels weird, and Ramona confronts Bethenny.

👠 I totally forgot to watch Feud: Bette and Joan on Sunday, so caught up with it On Demand today. This miniseries hasn’t ceased to impress me, and I wish it would never end. This week, the stars are about to film Hush…Hush, Sweet Charlotte, originally titled Whatever Happened to Cousin Charlotte? because the studio wanted to keep milking Baby Jane. The episode was entitled Hagsploitation, which was apparently a thing in the early 1960s. Charlotte was also one of my favorite movies growing up; I was forever trying to catch it on TV. I remember my parents going to see it in the theater, and I was annoyed because they thought I was too young to go. Even at a tender age, I liked weird, scary stuff. Even better, John Waters guest starred as William Castle, who directed Joan Crawford in Straight Jacket, the two of them making the rounds of movie theaters to promote the film. Eventually, Joan was replaced in Charlotte by Olivia de Havilland, but we’re not at that point yet.

Hush

Apr12

April 11, 2017 – Sonny Sees Jax, No One Gets the Baby, Beverly Hills Reunites & Imposters Bids Adieu

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Lulu brings Rocco to visit Dante at the station. She’s all ready for her visit with Charlotte. Dante asks what she’s afraid of.

Hayden is having coffee outside of Perks, while Curtis runs the steps. She’s adding an extra kick to her coffee, and offers him a bottle in a paper bag. He accepts, saying he has to stay hydrated. She’s hiding from Finn because she wants to get back together and is scared he’ll say yes.

Finn isn’t doing too well. He’s like forget it, and we see he’s given himself a shot. But it’s a dream.

The hooded figure goes through Alexis’s house. He looks at a photo album. Alexis arrives home.

Carly tells Sonny not now. He asks if she heard him right, and repeats that he wasn’t unfaithful after all. I’m going to say this again. That wasn’t what she was angry about in the first place. Why would this change anything? Another case of the man not listening and/or hearing what he wants to hear.

Alexis goes into the house and sees a light is on. She asks if anyone is there. Kristina walks in, and Alexis almost crowns her with a laptop.

Hayden tells Curtis that she left Finn with a list of rehabs. Curtis says he knows Finn hurt her. He wanted to kill him, but Finn is legit; he’s a good guy, but the detox was rough. Hayden says he called her out on all of her insecurities. Curtis says he was out of his mind. Hayden says if it wasn’t true, it wouldn’t have been in his head, and he doesn’t trust her. Curtis says Finn loves her, but he needs to go to rehab and it’s a long road. She can’t fix it or save him. If she tries, she’ll end up losing herself.

Hayden’s phone rings. It’s Finn. She asks if he’s okay, and he says not really. He wants her to come over. She asks if he’s called a rehab, and he says he needs to see her.

Sonny explains about the recording to Carly. He says a girl who’s cold-hearted enough to set him up, would have recorded the act, but she only recorded the aftermath. He says that Nelle drugged him, and that’s why he blacked out. He says it should have been a clue, since in all his years of drinking, it’s never happened before. Carly asks if he has proof, and he tells her Nelle confessed. He says they can be together now, because he didn’t listen to what the problem really is.

Lulu tells Dante she can’t wait to get to know Charlotte, and that she’s bought Charlotte a bunch of toys. Dante says she seems nervous. Rocco gives Dante some cookies. He tells Rocco they’re the best cookies ever, even though that’s doubtful from the look on his face. When Rocco runs off, Lulu tells Dante about Rocco adding extra salt. Dante tells Lulu that gifts or cookies won’t make Charlotte love her.

Finn tells Hayden he does trust her; that’s why he asked her to help with the detox. She says he didn’t have anyone else. He says he’s ashamed of how he treated her. She tells him that he needs help that she can’t give him, and to please find it. She hangs up. She puts more liquor in her coffee, and Curtis says she did good. She asks why she feels like crap then.

Finn tells Roxie that he blew it. Hayden wants him to go to one of those places. He doesn’t think he can handle 28 days without practicing medicine, Roxie, and Hayden, but if he doesn’t go, he’ll lose Hayden forever.

Kristina doesn’t think a laptop is a very good weapon, and Alexis says she’ll use a fireplace poker next time. Kristina points out that it’s weird, and Alexis is still jumpy. Alexis says it seemed like someone was in the house, and tells her about the light. Kristina says maybe she forgot that she left it on. Alexis tells Kristina about Nathan’s visit, and Kristina says he talked to her too.

Carly wonders why Nelle would confess now. Maybe she’s lying because she likes Michael. Sonny says as soon as she said she drugged him, he knew it was true. No matter how drunk he was, she’s not his type. I guess he’s never heard of beer goggles. Everything after that, is on him. He tells Carly how much he loves her, and asks if this can be over. Carly looks at the wine on the table with the two glasses, and says it can’t.

Alexis says Nathan had no right to question Kristina. Kristina says they just ran into each other, but he was more worried about Alexis than anything else. He thinks she might be withholding information and putting herself in danger. Alexis says she’ll call Jordan, and tell her to make Nathan back off. Kristina asks what she could be hiding at this point.

Finn calls Tracy because he needs a good dose of the truth. He gets voicemail, and apologizes for what he said, calling her the best friend he’s ever had. He tells her that he misses her. He decides to go out for some fresh air.

Hayden thinks that Curtis talking to Finn is a good idea. He needs a friend, and she can’t be one. Curtis has been where Finn is, and can possibly get through to him. Curtis says he can’t convince Finn to go to rehab any more than she can. She gets up, obviously drunk. She tells Curtis they should go shake their booties and dance the night away. He says she’s crazy, but in a good way. She kisses him.

Sonny asks Carly if this is about his ultimatum, and says that he didn’t know where to go. If he’d just said something that morning, they could have worked things out. He knows he’s not easy to live with, and that Nelle shook her faith in him. He says nobody knows him in his core – the ugliness, anger, and brokenness – except her, and she loves him anyway. He needs her to love him, and he loves her. He says they can do this, and asks her to come back. Tears roll down her cheeks, and she says that she’s sorry, but he has to listen. With perfect soap timing, Jax pops out while putting on his shirt.

Dante says Lulu should just be herself. Lulu said she tried that, and Charlotte hates her. She was thinking about her needs instead of Charlotte’s. Dante says the more time Charlotte spends with her, the more she’ll get to know and like her. He tells Lulu to just be present and listen, instead of using bribery. Rocco joins them, and asks if Lulu will love Charlotte more than him.

Sonny tells Carly that didn’t take long. Jax says it’s her business. Sonny asks if it bothers him that he’s a back-up or a side piece. Carly tells him not to be ugly. Sonny says she crucified him for months, for a mistake he didn’t make, and the first chance she gets, she spreads her legs. Oooh! Jax tells him to apologize and leave, and Carly says let him go on. Sonny says Carly can’t last five minutes without a man in her bed, and that makes her a bad wife, but a great whore. Carly smacks him.

Alexis tells Kristina that she’s not hiding anything, but Kristina doesn’t believe her. Alexis says it’s going to sound “out there,” and Kristina says she can handle it. Alexis tells her that she feels like Julian isn’t dead, and it’s something tangible. She hears someone knocking, and there’s no one there; the phone rings, and ditto from a number she doesn’t recognize. She says she knows how Kristina felt about him, but Kristina says she can’t tell Alexis how to feel. She accepts Alexis’s grief, but that doesn’t explain phantom phone calls or knocks on the door. Alexis tells her about the credit card and phone call from the gas station.

Curtis tells Hayden to take it easy. She says there’s an attraction between them, and she’s free now. He says she’s wasted. He likes her a lot; she’s beautiful, smart, and edgy, although she’s sometimes a pita, but they’re friends. He doesn’t want to waste that or take advantage of it. She tells him to make her forget, and kisses him again. Mimicking Jax’s timing, Finn walks out and sees them.

Finn says he thought he’d get some fresh air, and asks what they’re up to. Curtis says it’s not what it looked like. He says Hayden cares about Finn, but he has no one to blame but himself. She’s drunk and reckless because of him. If he doesn’t want to get help, Finn will crash and burn, and take her along with him. He says he’s been there, but Finn is worse off, considering how long he’s been using. He says it hurts to admit you need help when something has control over you. The addiction is controlling him, and he’d better take help or he’ll lose Hayden. Finn says he loves her, and walks away. Hayden starts crying, and Curtis holds her.

Carly tells Sonny that she’s sorry he’s hurt and found out the truth too late, but he doesn’t get to come in her house and name call. He says she wanted the truth, and she lists all the recent lies he’s told her. She says for someone who prides himself on his word, he’s the biggest liar of all. She says it’s never going to be different and he says that’s right, because they’re done. He slams out. Jax asks Carly if she’s okay. She says no, but she will be.

Alexis tells Kristina that she has unresolved feelings for Julian. She wants to believe that what he said in the letter is true, and she never got a chance to talk to him about it. Kristina says she had a huge loss and serious trauma; it’s going to take time to recover. Alexis thanks her for talking her down. Kristina suggests she stick around, and maybe spend the night. She finds the photo album on the floor. Alexis says she’s sure she’d put it away, and Kristina says it was open as though someone was just looking at it.

Dante tells Rocco that they love him more than ever, and Lulu says he’s everything. They’re just excited about him getting a sister. Dante says no parent likes any one kid better than another – it’s the law. Lulu says they love them both. Rocco asks if that means Charlotte’s dad loves her too. Dante says he does, but a judge needs to sort things out. He asks if Charlotte is going to live with them, and Lulu says for now, they’ll just visit with her. Group hug.

Curtis gives Hayden some water. She apologizes. Curtis says his ego can always use a boost. She asks what’s wrong with her, and he says only small stuff. She’ll bounce back with or without Finn; she’s too stubborn not to. She wonders if what Curtis said made a difference, and if Finn is further on road to recovery or worse off.

Finn meets with a cliché-looking drug dealer. Actually, he’s a cliché-looking drug dealer who also looks like he stepped out of the 1960s.

Carly looks for some legal contact information. She tells Jax that Sonny is going to lash out, and she’s not going to let him trample over her. She has nothing to feel guilty about. Jax asks if she is feeling guilty, but she says no. They shared something special about them. She says she should feel guilty because she gave up too soon – at least Sonny thinks she did. She says she fought for as hard and as long as she could, but she’s done.

Alexis says she was showing Diane some old photos. Kristina goes down Memory Lane, and Alexis says it was nice while it lasted. She says she’s tired, and Kristina asks if she wants her to stay over, but Alexis says she’s fine and don’t worry. She isn’t going to put herself in any danger, just to bed. Kristina leaves.

Alexis looks at the photo album. She discovers that pictures are missing.

Tomorrow, Nina asks Valentin if he’s hiding something, Brad gets good news, and a dead body is found.

If Loving You is Wrong

Alex tells the judge to check the birth certificate. He asks who Brad is. Randal insists he’s the father, and the judge asks if he’s taken a paternity test. He’s annoyed that Randal is wasting his time. He says it’s obvious neither one of them is a fit parent. He’s going to order that the baby be placed in foster care. Until paternity is established, neither one of them is going to see the baby. He kicks everyone out of his office.

Randal follows Alex and blocks her way. He tells her she can’t stop him from getting his son, and she says she just did. She hates the day she met him, and he says that makes two of them. He does that creepy smile, and says he has the upper hand. He’s going to the police to tell them that she set him up. He says her mother told him, so that’s proof. Alex says big deal; she’s dead. He continues being all weird, and talks about her parents getting killed. He says her parents were evil people, and he sees it in her. She smacks him and he laughs. Omg, I hate this guy. He asks when the funeral is being held, and if there’s a hillbilly fund in a mason jar for it. He tells her that she has nothing anymore, not even her baby boy. She asks him to hold her purse. Oh, okay, she starts yelling that he tried to rob her. He throws the purse back, and a taxi comes out of nowhere and picks her up.

Someone named Diane knocks on Kelly’s door. It’s her ex’s mother. She looks around, and says it’s a nice house. She asks if her son’s money bought it, but Kelly doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Diane asks why he’s in jail for fraud then. Kelly asks why Diane is there, and Diane says for her son; he needs a place to stay. She says Kelly owes him. Kelly doesn’t think it’s a good idea for him to stay there because of Justice. Diane finds his name ironic when his father didn’t get any in taking the fall for her. Kelly apologizes, and Diane says she’s not that sorry, since she’s free. She insists on Kelly helping him get back on his feet. Kelly says that’s not going to happen. Diane tells her not to make her show how far she’ll go when she’s been wronged. Kelly says she’s just looking out for her son, and Diane says watch her look out for hers.

Lushion talks to Lamont about Andrew. There’s been no trace of him. Pete calls. He’s getting sprung from the hospital soon, and going into protective custody. Pete isn’t thrilled, but Lushion says it’s for his own good. Pete says Eddie isn’t God and couldn’t even find him under an alias. He tells Lushion that he’ll keep in touch. Someone has to know where he is, and he trusts Lushion.

Randal stomps into the station. Lushion asks why he’s there, and he says to make a complaint. He’s supposed to talk to Rick, and asks if Rick is a good guy. Lushion says he is, and asks why Randal dropped the lawsuit against Eddie. Randal says he moved on to something better. Lushion says Eddie told him that he saved Randal’s life, but Randal says if the other guy hadn’t shown up, he’d be dead. Lushion asks if he saw another officer there, and shows him Andrew’s picture. Randal says he was a little busy, so no. Lushion asks if there was a shootout before they arrived, and Randal tells him that only Alex had a gun, and was holding it to his head. He claims she set everything up. He explains that the FBI told him to talk to Rick. Lushion asks if he’s sure he wants to go through with this. Randal says that’s Lushion’s problem; he wants to let Alex and Eddie go. Lushion tells Randal to leave Alex alone, but Randal insists that he did nothing and she tried to have him killed. He does the creepy smile thing, and says he’s letting nothing go. Lushion says it’s just going to get worse, and Randal says that’s his plan. Rick comes by, and Lushion introduces them.

Randal sits at Rick’s desk. Lushion tells Rick to take what he says with a grain of salt. He asks how bad the house is, and Rick says he needs a crew. Lushion asks if there are any leads, and Rick tells him they got DNA and hair from the house. Lushion wonders if they’re looking at someone, but Rick can’t say.

Eddie comes in the breakroom to bug Esperanza. He tells her internal affairs is driving him crazy. That’s a short putt. BA-DUM-CHH! She wishes she could burn some sense into his ass. She asks why he was in the office, and Eddie tells her to ask Alex. He says they’re trying to figure out what happened. He says Alex called her parents and had them kidnap Randal, and the DA is trying to find out about her. They see a news item about Andrew going missing. Esperanza says that should be of interest to him.

Lushion gets a crew out to clean the house. It says cleaning service on the van, but that’s not how it works. There’s a van that actually says “crime scene” on it that cleans up crime scenes. Not a regular cleaning service. I know this because, unfortunately, I lived next door to someone who committed suicide.

Lushion sees Brad parked in the driveway of Alex’s house. Brad says her car isn’t there, and Lushion says she totaled it. Brad asks if she’s okay, and Lushion tells him to ask her. He asks if Brad is all right. Brad says he’s fine, and asks what Lushion is doing there. Lushion explains they’re moving in, and gives Brad props for rescuing the baby. Brad says he did what he had to. Lushion calls him humble, and repeats that he should talk to Alex. He says the one thing he can’t do is protect his heart from her. Lushion says he has a lot of heart left, and he can fix it. Brad says he doesn’t want to, and Lushion asks why he’s there then. Brad doesn’t know, and Lushion says he has nothing to lose. A delivery truck comes. and Lushion has to run. Lushion tells the driver he has to come back. He needs a few more hours.

Natalie sits by Joey’s bedside at the hospital. Kelly comes in with flowers. Kelly asks how he’s feeling and he says like he got shot. She tells him that she brought flowers, and he says he’s not dead. Natalie tells her not to pay him any mind. She can tell something is up with Kelly, and Joey tells them to take it outside.

In the hallway, Natalie asks what’s going on. Kelly tells her about Ramsey. Natalie is shocked and sorry. Kelly says they’re looking for suspects. She says she hardly knew him, but Natalie says that doesn’t make it any less sad. She knows there’s something else, and tells Kelly to spill it. Kelly asks if a man has ever been abusive to Natalie, and tells her about Travis. She says he’s like a different person, and she doesn’t know what to do. Natalie suggests shooting him in his ass. Just pull the trigger one good time; she doesn’t even have to mess up her hair. She tells Kelly to get a gun. Kelly says she has a meeting to get a restraining order. Natalie says that’s good, but a gun will restrain him too. She’ll call her girl Michelle, and she’ll help Kelly. Kelly wants to focus on the restraining order. Natalie says she told her.

Alex looks at a family photo and cries. She’s cleaning the house, because when in doubt, scrub something. Esperanza knocks on the door. She says she called, but Alex says sorry, she needed time alone. Esperanza says she heard what happened and she’s sorry. She asks if Alex needs help with the funeral, but Alex says let the county deal with it. Esperanza thinks she’s being harsh, but Alex says they don’t deserve any dignity. She wants Esperanza to drop it.

Alex asks why she’s there, and Esperanza says she was checking on her. Alex says she’s fine and not to tell her she isn’t. Esperanza asks how the baby is, and Alex says the doctor says he’s fine. She tells Esperanza he’s been put into foster care, even though she had nothing to do with it. Esperanza thinks she called her parents to help her to get rid of Randal. Alex asks if she’s there to aggravate her, and Esperanza says she’s there to help. She knows that Alex went to see them. She shows Alex some phone records and pictures. Alex asks if she’s an investigator. Esperanza says she’s trying to get ahead of Alex being charged as an accessory to murder.

Esperanza says she can get in a lot of trouble. She tells Alex to drop the attitude, and asks if she never wants to see her kids again. She says that Alex has to come up with an air-tight excuse before someone comes around. She says protests have already started, and things can get ugly fast. Her father was part of an anti-government militia. She needs to come up with a good story; she can’t negate seeing her parents. She should say that she was trying to prevent Randal from harm, and not deviate from the story, no matter what. She tells Alex she was never there. Alex thanks her ,and they hug. (I guess Esperanza doesn’t realize Lushion is two houses away?)

Alex wipes her tears away.

Kelly can’t get in to see the attorney because he had an emergency. She asks if there’s someone else they can recommend; she can only come on her lunch break and needs to file the restraining order. She says it’s urgent, and the secretary says she’ll phone in the morning. Totally unrealistic, since I’m sure they would steer her to someone else. She has to get to Justice’s game, and asks for security to walk her to her car. She calls Justice, but he says the other team had to forfeit, so the game was canceled. He tells her that Travis is giving him a ride home. Kelly stares in silence at the phone.

Next time, Diane comes to Kelly’s office, Louise suggests that Alex could have cheated on Randal, and Lushion talks to Alex.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion, Part One

Kyle gives Dorit the skinny on reunions. Along with her gorgeous German Shepherd. Dorit realizes she’ll have to put her big girl panties on. To change it up a little, we get pre-reunion observations from the women in their home settings. We also get mini flash forwards. Next is the getting ready. LisaV tells Andy not to be mean.

And so we begin. Hmm…I’m not crazy about Eileen’s outfit. The outfits as a whole aren’t that dazzling, except for LisaV, Dorit and Erika. LisaR and Erika are wearing the same shoes, and Lisa informs us that she’s not wearing underwear. Andy talks about people on social media calling Dorit “Doritos,” and she says with a name like hers, she’s used to it. Everyone talks about how their names have been made fun of. Andy asks Erika about being chosen for Dancing with the Stars, which at this point, hadn’t started filming yet. LisaR says it’s about pacing yourself, and thinks Erika can go all the way. She has the same dance partner that LisaV did, and they joke about that.

We jump right in, with Andy talking about how Dorit called Erika “cold.” We flash back to various interactions between the two of them. I just know it’s coming – Pantygate. We end up with the Hong Kong dinner where Erika lost it. The T-shirt dress is discussed. Oh, for God’s sake. A fan thinks Dorit wanted to pick a fight with Erika from day one, but Dorit says they got off on the wrong foot, and it wasn’t her intention. The first Pantygate mention is dropped, and Dorit says it was meant to be playful. Erika says there’s a bit of truth in all kidding, and that’s how you get away with sh*t. I tend to agree, but the reactions to that went way overboard and for way too long.

Dorit says you can’t live a life walking on eggshells. Andy asks LisaV if Erika is being fair in saying Dorit talks sh*t, and Lisa says in all fairness, Dorit does talk a lot. Andy asks Eileen about Erika’s reaction to her saying that it’s not like Dorit killed her child, and Eileen says she didn’t feel personally attacked. She realized something else was going on. Erika says she didn’t want to break down like that, but it is something she thinks about occasionally, with her son being a police officer. We find out that Erika leant Eileen her glam squad as a peace offering. LisaR says meltdowns happen, and Kyle says it was like someone took over Erika’s body. They agree they all felt bad for Eileen.

Andy asks Erika about being the mom of a police officer. She says you know anything is possible. She doesn’t want to make a big deal about it, but she does get scared. He lives with her, and only when he pulls up after work, can she relax. She says he gets ribbed at work about the show. They talk about her sensitivity, and how she reveals herself slowly. Kyle says being sensitive can make you extra guarded. They discuss Erika’s trip home, and when her mother apologized for being hard on her as a child. We see a part of their conversation we hadn’t seen before. LisaV asks if Erika went the opposite in raising her son. Lisa says her parents weren’t demonstrative, so she lavished affection on her children. Erika says that her mother was loving, but made her grow up quickly. She talks about still giving her son hugs and kisses, and how much he hates it.

Andy says that LisaV, LisaR, and Eileen tried to co-exist, but it didn’t always turn out well. What a stupid choice of words. We flash back to some of their interactions. Part of the problem with these reunions is that they bring back old stuff people have gotten past, they relive the moment, and get pissed off all over again. Eileen says she was right about LisaV not being so nice. They talk about the Yulan documentary. Eileen says she wanted to bridge the gap by going with Lisa to watch it, and Lisa says there was a connection. Andy asks if it brings LisaV joy to see LisaR in the hot seat, and she says Andy likes it more. Nice return. Kyle thinks she does a little. LisaV says she likes a lot about LisaR, although sometimes she wants to strangle her. LisaR says that she’d thought they were cool when she was invited on the Hong Kong trip, and LisaV says a lot of things came up in Hong Kong. We flash back to LisaR being an idiot at the dinner. LisaR says they had a powerful moment, and they start talking about a mutual friend who passed away. Andy says he feels like they’re on the path to good things. He’s a regular Papa Hemingway tonight.

We move on to Dorit’s accent, and flash back to some Dorit moments. Andy asks why Boy George lives with them. She says she has a big house and extra room, and he lands there between gigs. (At one time, PK was his manager.) They talk about the flack she’s gotten for her parenting, and how many domestic helpers she has. Kyle says she never had s nanny, but it depends on the parent’s working life, so she’d never judge anyone. Dorit speaks Hebrew, Italian, Spanish and English fluently, and somehow, we go back to the accent thing. LisaR has to be shown the video to be reminded she called Dorit’s accent fake. Andy tries to stir the pot, but it doesn’t happen.

PK is going to join them. Andy asks how Dorit feels. She hopes the women don’t attack him, and that he gets to have his say. Andy asks how Erika feels, and she says it’s not her show. Alrighty then.

We get a glimpse of the Beverly Hills lifestyle, and flash back to various shopping trips, vacations, parties, and purchases. Andy asks if any of them will wear tonight’s outfits again, but most of them say no. Kyle has a section of her closet devoted to scary moments on the show. Andy suggests a clothing museum. We revisit Dorit’s $230,000 Bentley. They talk expensive cars for a while. We find out that Erika’s glam squad flies business class. Well, unless they’re on the private jet.

We see a little of PK behind the scenes. Dorit tells him to just be himself. Andy asks how he feels, and he says a bit nervous. We find out his name is Paul. Andy asks how he got so rich, and he says he started richer in real estate. Andy asks if his nosiness is natural or is he getting involved where he doesn’t belong, and he says maybe 50/50. And here it comes…

We flash back to the source of Pantygate, and see clips from its formation. Andy stupidly asks why it makes Erika uncomfortable, and she says the whole thing is embarrassing. Dorit has to insist once again that she didn’t think Erika did it on purpose, because for some reason, Erika is deaf to those words. Dorit says it was like saying don’t talk about a pink elephant in the room, and Andy – once again the soul of eloquence – asks if she’s comparing Erika’s who-ha to a pink elephant. Kyle says Erika was asked if she was wearing underwear, and didn’t volunteer the information. Well, really she did. Kinda. Erika says it’s gone on too long. PK says it wasn’t like he sat there and stared. LisaV says she didn’t think it would be such a big deal, since Erika wears a c-word necklace. Erika says that’s different than being told that you’re doing something like that on purpose. Because again she can’t hear that no one ever said that. If they had, we’d have seen the video ten times already. PK tells Erika not to call his wife a nasty person, and she says she’s not. She’s calling PK a nasty person for what he said.

Next time, round part two, LisaR again asks if people were doing coke at Dorit’s dinner party, Kim joins the group and tells Eden not to take her inventory, Erika tells Dorit to get the f out of here, and LisaR walks out.

🎭 Tonight, was the Imposters finale. If you haven’t been watching, I highly suggest you marathon this on On Demand. It’s fun and flirty, with a plot of twists and turns. In the final episode of the season, we got a glimpse of Maddie’s past and saw her first con. At the end, almost every character got conned as well, and Uma Thurman made a brief appearance. While there was promise of more intrigue to come, to date, Imposters hasn’t been renewed or canceled. I’m hoping for a second season. This show is like a breath of fresh air.

🚤 Below Deck Mediterranean starts Tuesday, May 2nd at 9 pm, and will have female captain this season. Although I’m looking forward to the new shows, I’ll miss Captain Lee.

Apr10

April 9, 2017 – Gearing Up for a Black Fairy Battle & Are You Wives or Shade Trees?

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

Once Upon a Time

The Black Fairy carries a baby through the clouds. She lands in a coal mine. She tells a woman that this one isn’t for the mine. He’s to be cared for as though he was hers. (Or she could have said, it is mine. BA-DUM-CHH!) She tells baby Gideon that he won’t be needing the book any more, and tosses it aside.

In Storybrooke, Gideon tells Emma they’ll destroy the Black Fairy together. It’s impossible for Hook to return without her helping him. She knocks him down with some magic, and says if he doesn’t bring Hook back, she’ll make him do it. Gideon says she doesn’t frighten him; nothing does. She has no idea what he’s been through, being raised by the Black Fairy. He says that there are many waiting for him to protect them, and he’s very far from the bad guy. They have a common cause, whether she realizes it or not. He disappears, poof! in a puff of amber smoke.

Back in Gideon’s childhood days, the children the Black Fairy has imprisoned are being read to by Gideon. He says as long as he’s around, they’ll be safe from her. The Black Fairy enters, wishing them sweet dreams. She has a special bedtime story for Gideon, but she says that she sees he already has one, and takes the book from him. He says his real mother gave it to him, but she says she’s his real mother. Gideon says she’s not, and never will be. She says just because his mother was a hero, doesn’t make him one, and she’s going to show him exactly who he is.

She drags one of the children out of a cell. She tells him that if he wants to be a hero, to show her. The child cries to Gideon for help, but he does nothing. The Black Fairy calls him a coward, and says he has much to learn – from her.

In the present, Emma tells Gold that she has questions and she wants answers. She tells him that his son has a death wish. He banished Hook and wants her to help kill the Black Fairy. Gold explains that the Black Fairy is his mother. Belle says he wasn’t born evil; the Black Fairy made him this way. Gold says that’s not the only reason to save him, and that destroying the Black Fairy will save all of them. At present, she can only break out of her realm long enough to steal more children, but If she breaks free from her realm for good, it will be a disaster. He tells Emma that all of the darkness she’s ever faced comes from the Black Fairy, and if she isn’t destroyed, they’re doomed.

Regina works at the cauldron. She tells Henry that casting a curse is one thing, but breaking it’s another. Henry tells her that if anyone can break her own curse, it’s her. She says she’s undone everything, except the big one. She asks if Henry can go pick up some tongue of newt – not the eye. Henry suddenly starts writing furiously in some kind of code, and cataracts cover his eyes.

Some time ago, Gideon asks the Black Fairy what she wants. She says it’s his 28th birthday. She thought they should celebrate, since he’s grown into a strong, loyal son, and his magic has blossomed. She can’t find the key to her vault, and tells him it was stolen. She instructs him to go to the mines, find out who’s responsible, and make them pay. She puts something that looks like a dog whistle around his neck, and he goes.

Moving forward, Emma goes to the clock tower. She tells Gideon that he reminds her of Henry when he first needed her help. She asks for the sword, and he gives it to her. She says they have a deal, and let’s get her pirate back.

In another realm, Hook goes into a bar (not the start of a joke), and dumps out a load of gems on the card table. Blackbeard says he’s interrupting the game, and draws his sword. Hook says he needs a magic bean, and these are the finest gems from Agrabah. He has one more thing to offer. Blackbeard hasn’t had a vessel since he lost the Jolly Roger, and Hook asks, what’s a pirate without a ship? He suggests playing a hand of cards for the ship. Everyone gets out of the way, and Hook sits down.

Right now, Gideon takes Emma to the sorcerer’s mansion. Emma says extreme magic isn’t like hailing a cab, but Gideon says she has him. He zaps them both inside, and tells her to arrange the ingredients that are on the table. She lights a candle, and he hands her the napkin that has her tears on it. A huge claw comes bursting through the door, followed by a giant spider. Gideon says it’s a message. I guess the Black Fairy hasn’t heard about texting. They throw bolts of magic at the spider, and Emma tells Gideon to run. Since I’m not afraid of spiders, this has never been my horror thing, but as spiders go, this one is pretty scary.

Back at the mines, Gideon tells everyone to gather around. He says his mother has been generous to them, and one of them has stolen the key from her. If it’s returned now, they’ll only face his wrath. He says with just a bit of magic, he can turn them into vermin. He pulls a kid out, and another one steps forward, saying it was him. He asks if Gideon remembers him. He reminds Gideon that he once read to him, but Gideon says he has no choice. The kid says he had no choice then, but he has a choice now; he knows his old friend is still in there. He tells Gideon to be the hero that he was meant to be, and help defeat the Black Fairy.

In the Storybrooke realm, the spider shoots webs on everything. Gideon says Emma’s magic is the only one strong enough to get into the Black Fairy’s realm. Webs are going everywhere, and they jet.

Sliding sideways, Blackbeard asks Hook what’s so important. Hook says the woman he loves is in danger. Blackbeard thinks maybe he should have kept the ship, and shows his hand, which I guess is a good one, but I don’t play cards. I could barely remember the high-scoring roles of the dice in Yahtzee when I went through a Yahtzee phase. Blackbeard tells Hook that it’s time to pay up. They go to the docks, but Hook says he forgot to mention that the ship is in the realm where Emma is, and he’ll have to give him the bean to get there. He also tells Blackbeard that he saw the six aces in his deck. Blackbeard says well played, but he’s coming along.

In the here and now, Regina asks Henry what the writing is about, but he doesn’t know. He asks why this happened, but Regina has no answers. She does know someone who might though. They go to a hospital. Emma says if Henry’s problem is being the author, they should ask the last one. She says hello to Isaac, and says they need to talk.

Isaac says he’s heard of this happening, but it never happened to him. He doesn’t think what he did was enough to get him locked up, and Regina says that he tried to kill them all. He says a writer needs motivation and inspiration. He wants out and a sports car; he wants to go back to the Big Apple. She suggests she drive a sports car over his head. He repeats that he wants freedom, a sports car, New York City, and because she’s being a pain, Hamilton tickets. I literally LOL. He says Henry’s writing is taking over, and he’s more powerful than he realizes. It’s only going to get worse, and Henry could end up in the cell next door.

Gideon and Emma run from the spider. He tells her she should leave, but she’s staying to help him.

Back in the mines, the kid asks where Gideon is taking him. Gideon explains that the reason the Black Fairy is collecting dust in the mine, is that she’s obsessed with perfecting the Dark Curse. Gideon asks what happened after he left, and the kid says it’s better left unsaid. Gideon apologizes, and says he regrets his weakness every day. The kid says they were children, but now they must stop her before it’s too late. The Savior can help them. He’s heard rumors of a crystal ball that can help them communicate across realms.

In the present day sorcerer’s mansion, the spider is squirting webs all over, and they’re covering everything. Emma and Gideon can’t leave the house. Emma gets stuck in a web, and Gideon takes the sword. He says once she’s dead, he can use the sword to channel the powers to another realm. The spider blocks the door. Gideon tells Emma that Hook’s return is impossible, and says he told her to walk away. He disappears, poof! in a puff of ocher smoke.

In whatever realm they landed, Blackbeard asks Hook where the Jolly Roger is, but Hook says it’s not his realm; something went wrong. He says whatever dark magic banished him, must have kept him from getting back. They hear whooping in the distance. Hook thinks he knows what it is. The Lost Boys. They’re in Neverland. The Lost Boys come after them, and they run.

Back to today, Emma struggles against the web. The spider screeches. Emma breaks free, but the spider binds her in a web cocoon. She gasps for air. In the clock tower, the sword is aglow. Gideon slices the air with it, and opens a portal. Emma is pulled toward the spider. The portal door in the clock tower starts to fizzle out, the spider suddenly backs off of Emma, and Gold appears. He wakes Emma, the magic withdraws from the sword. Emma and Gold make the spider tiny, and Emma steps on it. Too bad things don’t work that way IRL. Gold asks where Gideon is. Emma says he tried to kill her, and she’s sorry, but he can’t be saved; he’s evil.

The kid and Gideon look for the orb in a magic fish tank. Gideon pulls it out, and the kid (sorry, didn’t catch his name and figure he’s dispensable, so he’s been dubbed “the kid”) thanks him. The orb shatters, and the Black Fairy appears. She says she led them here, just like she led Gideon’s friend to the key. Gideon says it was a test. She says he was supposed to be different; he was a gift. She says his parents abandoned him, but she shared everything with him, and this is how he repays her. She’s disappointed in him. He says he should have stood up to her years ago. He’s not letting her do something terrible; the people have suffered long enough. Her lackeys grab the kid, and Gideon smacks her. She says there are many ways to hurt a person. She turns the kid into a spider, and she steps on him. She says Gideon could have saved him eons ago, but didn’t, so this is on him – and her boot. Okay, that was good. He calls her a monster. He says he’ll find the Savior and the Savior will destroy her. The Black Fairy says she knows all about the Savor, and has plans for her, just like she has plans for him. She takes his heart, and says now he’s hers in every way. He’ll do whatever she says. He’ll find the Savior and kill her. When the Savior dies, the sword will free her from her prison.

In Neverland, Blackbeard says that he thought Pan was dead. Hook says he is, and the Lost Boys took over. They get to the shore, and Blackbeard knocks Hook out. There’s a single canoe, and he makes a run for it. He tells Hook to enjoy his stay, adding, we’re pirates, what did you expect? He reminds Hook that he still owes him the ship. Uh-oh, here come the Lost Boys bearing torches.

Snow and Belle meet with Gold and Emma. Emma explains what happened, and tells them that Gideon is evil. Gold says he needs help. She says he needs to take responsibility for his actions, and Gold says he’ll do what he can to stop Gideon from being harmed. Snow says that they didn’t start this fight. Emma suggests they go home.

Belle tells Gold that Gideon is ripping them apart. He’s only been there a few days, and already caused all kinds of destruction. She thinks Emma is right, but Gold says he’s with the two of them now, and the Black Fairy’s damage is over.

In the clock tower, Gideon says that the Black Fairy’s plan failed. The Savior survived.

The Black Fairy appears – no poofing, no smoke. Gideon says the portal closed, but the Black Fairy says that as Emma’s life ebbed away, the portal opened just enough for her to slip through. She tells him he played his part to the hilt, and he says that he had no choice. She says a part of him wanted to help her, part of him always does. He says of course. She says good, because they have much to do.

Isaac tells Regina that he wanted sports car, and wouldn’t drive this to a Ping-Pong tournament. This, is a station wagon. He supposes the Hamilton tickets are a no, and says nobody’s magic is that powerful. Very funny dialogue tonight. Isaac suggests that they follow him. He tells her that if she wants to know what’s going on, to take a look at the book. Henry says it’s the final chapter, and Isaac says, end of story. Henry asks what happens to the Savior, and Isaac says she fights the final battle – and nobody wants to be around to see that. He drives away into the night.

Next time, the Black Fairy squares off with Emma, history will be rewritten and the past will be altered, everyone could be trapped forever, and Snow and David must decide whether or not Emma will be born.

💀 Yeah, now that The Walking Dead finally reeled me back in, the season is over.

🍑 On The Real Housewives of Atlanta some of the ladies continue to act like children, mostly Phaedra and Porsha. Phaedra blows my mind, because she’s beyond shady; she’s downright nasty. She’s constantly after Kandi – I guess because she and Todd are friends with Apollo – but she never ceases to top herself. Now she’s involved in a lawsuit against Kandi by one of Kandi’s ex-employees. Bleh. Although when Kandi said that Phaedra was like Geppetto with a bunch of Pinocchios around her, I nearly fell off my chair, laughing. There was a party to unveil Chateau Sheree, and I have to say, both the party and house were very cool. Even if the house does have an unfinished basement, which Kenya made sure that we knew. Kim Zolciak Biermann made an appearance (is NeNe far behind?), and we had a fun flashback down Memory Lane, including the time Sheree tried to pull Kim’s wig off in the middle of the street. Good times… Kim and Kenya had an argument, and as usual, Porsha was falling out of her clothes. She also thinks her deceased father would be proud of her. For what? Assault charges, or not knowing that the Underground Railroad is not a real railroad? Cynthia tried to ditch Peter for the millionth time, so not much going on there. This was the finale, but the only interesting ending blurb was that Kandi wrote Ed Sheeran‘s recent hit, Shape of You. The reunion looks like it should be a doozie.

🍷 So far, The Real Housewives of Potomac is a bit of a snooze. Katie had her casino night, and everyone seemed way overdressed for the venue, which looked like a Holiday Inn meeting room. The night included a performance of the strangest tribute to the Jackson Five, or tribute to Michael Jackson (okay, I wasn’t paying attention, but it was a Jackson tribute), that I’ve ever seen. Not that I’ve seen a lot of them. Or any really. It was a trio of dudes who looked and sounded like an act out of a high school middle school talent show. I honestly didn’t know what to make of it. We were introduced to new girl, Monique, whose husband is with the NFL. Maybe she’ll breathe some life into this already stale group.

🙌 And this goes for every other day of the week too…

MondayAwesome

Apr7

April 6, 2017 – Nelle and Anna Know It All, Potomac Movers and Shakers & a Coupla Macaroons

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Kiki wonders why Ava isn’t ready for their mani/pedi. Ava explains she’s still shaken up from the robbery. Kiki asks some questions, and Ava fills her in. Ava says they took something she doesn’t want anyone else to have.

Dante looks at the evidence bag with the pills in it.

Anna tells Valentin that they’re tryst meant something to her, like it did to him. She apologizes and takes his hand. She says she’s given him a lot to digest, so she’ll go. He asks her to wait.

Lulu is getting ready for her visit with Charlotte. She’s on the phone with the case worker, who obviously has some bad news, and gets cut off. Griff comes by, and she says Valentin is sabotaging her visit with her daughter.

Carly tells Bobbie she’s had so much bad news, she needs to process it. Bobbie asks if she wants company, and Carly says she does. She tells Bobbie that Jax is in town, and that Lady Jane passed away. Even worse, he’s the one who paid for the kidney. Geez, she barely took a breath in between those news gems.

Nelle meets with Jax at Perks. He says she’s wrong about Carly. He says she never contacted Nelle’s father about finding a kidney for Josslyn. He did.

Valentin says that Anna can’t just walk out like there’s nothing more to say. Anna says he must be furious, but at least he knows she wasn’t just stringing him along. She says he believes it was just manipulation on her part, but she knows it wasn’t, and doesn’t know how to convince him. She wonders what he wants from her, but he doesn’t know.

Lulu tells Griff the visit was postponed until tomorrow. He asks why, and she says the case worker practically hung up on her. She’s convinced Valentin is behind it. Griff says Valentin loves to play games, and Lulu thanks him for his support. Griff tells her that Valentin is dangerous (like she didn’t know), and he doesn’t believe Claudette committed suicide. Lulu says no man who could shoot Nicholas point blank should be a father. She runs off, and Griff tells her not to do anything stupid, which is like telling fire not to burn.

Michael meets Sonny, and tells him about Lady Jane. Sonny asks if Josslyn knows what happened with Nelle, and Michael says yes. Sonny wants to see her, but Michael doesn’t think it’s a good idea, since she’s hoping he and Carly get a divorce. Sonny says she might get her wish.

Bobbie can’t believe Jax never told Carly about the kidney. Carly says she’s disappointed, but doesn’t want to be a hypocrite – she would have done anything to save Josslyn, and a part of her feels grateful.

Jax tells Nelle that he thought because Frank had connections, he could help, but never knew he was going to use his own daughter. Nelle is like, did you think he was going to ask random strangers? Jax says he was desperate, and didn’t ask too many questions. He tells Nelle how sorry he is. He hopes she realizes she should be angry with him and not Carly. She tells him to stop lying for Carly.

Kiki asks Ava what was so important, and Ava says they took her charm bracelet. Kiki tells her that she’ll get it back. Ava says she just doesn’t like being without it, and sometimes evidence gets lost. She says she won’t relax until she gets it back, and Kiki says she’ll wait it out with her and go along to the station.

Dante meets with one of the perps who robbed The Floating Rib and his lawyer. He shows him the pills, and asks where the guy got them from.

Sonny tells Michael about he and Carly being asked to be Scout’s godparents. He says they agreed, but Carly made it clear that she wants to end the marriage. Michael says he wants to check in on her. Sonny knows how he must feel. Michael doesn’t like it, but he loves them, and will support them no matter what.

Michael leaves, and Griff sees Sonny. He says Sonny looks like he needs someone to talk to. Sonny tells him that it didn’t go well with Carly. He doesn’t want to get into it, and Griff says he’ll keep Sonny in his prayers. Sonny says he’s not sure prayer is going to be enough.

Bobbie asks Carly if it changes how she feels about Nelle. Carly says Frank selling a piece of his daughter is a terrible thing, but it doesn’t give her pass. Carly says she played the perfect part, slept with Sonny, and waited for the perfect moment to blow up everyone’s lives. She’ll never forgive her for that.

Nelle thinks Jax is lying. He says when he first met her, he thought maybe she knew his part in finding the kidney, and then realized she didn’t. He asks if she didn’t notice how his attitude changed toward her, when Carly was welcoming from the start because she didn’t know anything. Nelle says her father told her what happened, but Jax says that he can prove that Frank was lying.

Anna says perhaps she and Valentin could give each other another chance, so they don’t have to be enemies moving forward. Someone bangs on the door. Lulu bursts in, saying that Valentin’s little game isn’t working. She asks if Anna is there to arrest him, and says he’s not screwing up her relationship with her daughter.

Ava asks what Kiki’s news is, and Kiki tells her about registering for nurse’s aide classes. Ava says it’s a step up from the MetroCort. Kiki says she likes feeling like she’s helping people, and Ava says they’re lucky to have her. Kiki tells Ava that she’s learning a lot in the psyche ward, and is hoping to work there permanently. Ava says she doesn’t remember Kiki being interested in that, and Kiki says she is now. She wants to understand what happened to Morgan.

The perp wonders why Dante is asking about the pills, and says they’re not his drugs. Dante says they were his brother’s, and there’s no reason the pills should be there. He wants to know how they ended up with the other stuff. Dante tells him that this is his chance to make a difference, and maybe a difference with the judge. He asks who the pills came from. Like the perp took attendance. What is amusing though, is that Ava was the only one asked for her name.

Before Griff moves on, Sonny suggests that he say twenty prayers. Sonny is about to leave, when Bobbie comes in. He says he knows what she’s thinking, but she says she doesn’t. She knows he loves his kids and Carly, but every time, Carly ends up being the one who gets hurt.

Michael visits Carly. She thanks him for being there for Josslyn. Michael tells her about running into Sonny. He asks if they’re getting a divorce. Carly says she can’t think about it right now. She and Jax have been discussing something important about Nelle.

Jax shows Nelle a copy of the cashed check. He says Frank insisted on a personal check; he probably wanted to use it for blackmail later. He explains that Carly thought the kidney came from Jake. Nelle insists that her father never saw any check. Jax shows her the copy on his phone. I have to agree with Nelle here that this would be an easy thing to fake. I don’t see how showing her a picture of a signature would be enough to convince her of anything.

Sonny tells Bobbie that in his defense, he was grieving, but he never wanted any of this to happen. Bobbie says she understands more than he realizes, and grief takes away the ability to reason. What she doesn’t understand is why he didn’t warn Carly. He says he wishes he had, and she says her too.

Ava suggests pediatrics, but Kiki wants to understand how Morgan spun out of control so badly. It’s a place to start, and she wants to help. It’s also about doing something worthwhile. Ava wants to see her continue to move forward, but Kiki says everything she learns makes it more puzzling. She spoke to a doctor who was struck by how fast it happened. Morgan’s moods went out of control within weeks. She wonders how his medication quit so completely and quickly. Ava tells her she’s not going to get an answer.

The perp says he doesn’t talk to cops. Dante asks if he’s going to throw away his chance. The lawyer says only the DA can make that call. The perp says he’s no snitch and he’s not helping. Dante tells him good luck with prison. He gives the pills to an officer to get prints and DNA.

Sonny gets a text and jets out of Kelly’s.

Lulu insists that Valentin is playing games with her visitation. Anna says he knows where to find her, and gets the hell out of there. Valentin doesn’t know what Lulu is talking about. Lulu says the visit was canceled, and he says this is the first he’s hearing about it. He looks at his phone, and says Mrs. Watkins had a family emergency. Lulu says he could have created the emergency. He tells her that she’s so self-centered and entitled, he doesn’t need to cause a problem for her. Lulu says maybe he did it, maybe not, but he kept Charlotte from her for years and no child is safe with him. She will get custody. He tells her to that it’s the same, tired argument, and asks what if they talk about something different, like Nelle? Lulu is the worst. She’s actually the one I think shouldn’t be around children. I’m also finding it hard to believe that visitation would be canceled because the case worker had an emergency, but it is Port Charles.

Nelle tells Jax that after the surgery when she was sick, Frank said he was waiting for the money and everything would be okay. She would be able to go to the school she wanted to. Then he disappeared for a few weeks, telling her that he had a great opportunity he had to take. When he came back, he said Carly never paid him, and it was an illegal transaction, so there was nothing he could do about it. She wanted to call Carly herself, so she found his address book. That’s when she saw it. She suddenly sits down, saying omg.

Valentin says he understands that Lulu introduced herself to Nelle, and that Nelle knows now that Lulu is trying to take Charlotte away from him. Lulu says the truth will come out to the court. Except for Nina, everyone in town hates him. Lulu says that Anna knows what he’s about, and Valentin says she’d be surprised what Anna knows.

Anna runs into Griff. He asks if everything is okay; he knows that she was searching for answers. She says she found them. It turns out she did do all the things that Valentin accused her of.

Michael says that Nelle’s story was true, except it was Jax, not Carly, but Carly says it’s not that simple. She understands how Frank’s lying could affect have affected Nelle, but she got twisted with revenge. Knowing Carly should have changed her opinion. She ruined all their lives, and Carly can’t get past Nelle using Morgan’s death to manipulate her. Everyone is sounding a bit entitled today.

Nelle says she believes Jax. Jax wants to make it right, but she wants to be left alone. He gives her his card, and tells her to call him. When she’s alone, Nelle says she did what her father wanted. She made Carly suffer. She made Carly hurt and hate her forever, and it was all a lie. Tears roll down her cheeks.

Kiki says she can’t forget about Morgan, and of course has questions. She asks why Ava is so upset, and Ava says she just wants what’s best for her. Kiki says working in the psyche ward is best. Ava gets a text to come to the station and identify her belongings. She tells Kiki to go to the salon without her; it’s going to be a non-event. She apologizes for snapping at Kiki. Kiki says she needs closure about Morgan.

Sonny goes to the station. Dante says it could be nothing, but something strange turned up in the robbery evidence – Morgan’s prescription bottle.

Anna tells Griff that it’s a long story, and she’ll tell him later. He says he’ll see her at her appointment tomorrow. They hug.

Valentin tells Lulu that if she has any future problems, to contact child services. When she gets outside, Lulu says it sounds like Nelle could be on her side. Although I’m not sure how she would get that from the conversation. Oh, maybe it’s that self-centered, entitled thing again.

Valentin recalls what Anna said and how she took his hand. Please, no.

Michael sees Nelle on the bench, crying.

Jax tells Carly that he told Nelle everything. He says she didn’t want to believe it at first, but something clicked. She had memories she didn’t want to share, but it hit her hard when she realized she’d been lied to her entire life. He asks if it changes the way Carly feels about Nelle, and Carly says not at all. He asks if it changes how she feels about him.

Sonny tells Dante that he’ll get the name of whoever had the pills. Dante tells him not to get involved. He’s having them analyzed for DNA and prints. Ava overhears.

Tomorrow, Jax asks Carly’s forgiveness, Michael tells Nelle that she can’t take it back, and Elizabeth asks Franco if he’s lying.

🏛 Trying to catch up with The Real Housewives of Potomac, and caught tonight’s rerun encore performance. The highlights were Ashley winning a dance contest for charity – or as Karen put it, “humping for a cause.” Apparently, Ashley has grown on Karen, which compels me to tell Ashley to run. Robyn and her ex main squeeze ex-husband guy she divorced, but is living with, have downsized, and now (horrors!) own a townhouse. Karen is also in the market for a new home – she wants us to know she’s “resizing, not downsizing” – and I thank God, my lucky stars, and the heavens that I’m not her realtor. The looks on the real estate agents’ faces as they show houses to her are priceless, and alone worth watching for.  (Yes, I know that was a grammatically terrible sentence – and I was an English major.)

🍰 Tonight, the kids on MasterChef Junior were mastering macaroons. Every single cookie looked fabulous, but unfortunately the pink lemonade ones – which sounded heavenly – were overcooked and crumbly. One boy attempted maple bacon macaroons, but I probably don’t have to tell you how that turned out. He definitely gets props for being bold though.

gordonramsay

Apr6

April 5, 2017 – Anna Remembers & the NYC Wives are Back

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Anna tells Valentin that she remembers everything.

Scotty asks Ava what the crisis du jour is. She tells him that she got the pills from Lucy, but just after the transaction, the thieves snatched the pills. The PCPD has them, and today is the first day of the end of her life.

Lulu chases down Dante at the station. She reminds him that it’s the first supervised visit with Charlotte today. She tells him that she made a new friend – Nelle.

Sonny sees Nelle at Perks, and tells her she should be more careful.

Josslyn tells Michael that Jax is in town.

Carly tells Jax that Nelle got it in her head that she gave Frank money for a kidney. Jax says he’s the one that did.

Ava tells Scotty that just when she made the deal with Lucy, the masked morons came in, demanding everything. Scotty tells her don’t claim the pills. Ava says she’s not an idiot, but they’re going to wonder why Morgan’s pills are showing up after his death. Ava thinks they should steal the pills back.

Lulu tells Dante that she told Nelle about Valentin keeping Charlotte from her. She was just telling the truth, and Nelle was listening. She brings up Nelle asking about Michael. Dante tells her to hold off on her hustle. Using Nelle could blow up in her face.

Anna asks Valentin for a drink. She says they have vastly different memories, and Robert pulled some strings. She met with an expert on memory loss, and she’s been suppressing some things. She’s beginning to remember. She says he’s right. She manipulated him out of classified information that she sold to the DVX. She says she learned that she was a victim too.

Michael tells Josslyn he’s always here for her. She thinks Jax is staying for a while, and that Carly is getting a divorce. Michael says whatever happens is up to Carly and Sonny, but Josslyn says it’s really Carly’s decision. She says that Sonny isn’t responsible for Morgan’s death, but he is responsible for sleeping with Nelle. She says Nelle was Michael’s friend, as well as hers.

Nelle tells Sonny they’re out of each other’s lives. He says she must have made one hell of a sales pitch. She says she doesn’t think she would have gotten the job without Bobbie. He says she did what she came for. She says he and Carly do what they want, and don’t care about anyone else. He says she’s talking about herself, and she says she learned from the master – his wife. Or is it ex-wife now?

Jax tells Carly that when he realized they couldn’t find a legitimate donor, he called Frank and offered him a million dollars. He says he had no idea that Frank would sacrifice his own daughter’s kidney. Carly says this explains why Jax wanted her to drop the search. He says he didn’t know Nelle was Frank’s daughter, but Carly says it doesn’t matter, and asks why he didn’t tell her.

Scotty tells Ava that he won’t do it; he’s out. Ava says he’s in. She doesn’t think Sonny will appreciate what he’s done up until now. Who knows what she might blurt out when Sonny scares her? She says he probably won’t kill Scotty, but Scotty will likely spend time in jail. If he doesn’t come through for her, she doesn’t see a bright future for him.

Lulu promises Dante that she’ll focus on the visit, and getting to know Charlotte. Even if she finds a use for Nelle, she’s going to need more than that.

Michael tells Josslyn that he was hoping Carly and Sonny would last this time. He tells her neither one is perfect. Josslyn says Carly would never cheat. He says Sonny lost their only biological child. He thought he killed his own son, and they can’t imagine how he felt. Michael says it’s not so black and white to him. Josslyn says that’s how she feels about Nelle.

Sonny tells Nelle that what she did to Michael and Josslyn was the worst. She says she’s genuinely sorry about it, but he says she doesn’t think about anyone but herself. She says she’s the only victim, and he says she sounds like she’s proud of it.

Jax tells Carly that he didn’t know Nelle was Frank’s daughter, so he thought he’d let it go. Carly says he should have told her from the start. He says she would have stopped him, and he had to save their daughter. Nothing else mattered, and the thought didn’t cross his mind that he’d hurt Carly. He says his sins are coming back to haunt him. He asks if she can ever forgive him. He says it doesn’t seem real. Carly says it was wrong for a whole bunch of reasons. Jax says Nelle was able to hurt Josslyn.

Michael tells Josslyn that Nelle can’t get out of her own way, and is someone she shouldn’t be around. Josslyn says a part of her still likes Nelle, and she thinks Michael does too.

Nelle tells Sonny that Carly took what she needed and never looked back. It didn’t matter whether she lived or died, but he turns a blind eye to her selfishness – or admires it. She says they deserve each other, and can suffer side by side. He says the one who’s going to suffer the most is her.

Anna tells Valentin that she was forced by Faison to hand over the secrets. Valentin asks what Faison has to do with it. She says they were in an antagonistic relationship for years, and Valentin adds that Faison was obsessed with her. Anna says it was part of his plan to compromise her; reveal her as a traitor, and she’d have no one else to turn to. Valentin isn’t buying it. He says she can pretend it never happened, and asks why she’s there. She says she remembers. Valentin asks to tell him something personal then. He wants the truth, and to know she’s not making it up.

An officer is tagging the evidence. Scotty acts like it’s old home week and he’s looking for Dante. The officer says he’ll be back, and Scotty goes into the evidence room like he belongs there.

Lulu shows up at Ava’s place. Ava says it’s unexpected. Lulu says she was hoping Ava could help her with something that concerns Nicholas. She tells Ava about the hearing, and says she can’t let Valentin keep her daughter. Ava agrees. Lulu asks if there’s anything Ava can tell her, something they’ve overlooked that could help her against Valentin. Ava says everything she knows is in her statements. She warns Lulu that Valentin is more than willing to kill anyone who crosses him.

Anna talks about being caught in a downpour going to a drop sight. She saw Valentin, and asked what he was doing. He pointed out a statue of the patron saint of prisoners, and they ended up holding hands. He says she took his hand. She looked into his eyes, and they were sad, so she took him to the hotel across the square and asked if he wanted to stay the night. She says they were together. Valentin asks what he said after – that he’d been with women before, but always paid for them, and it was the first time he’d made love.

Carly hates that she let someone hurt her family, and Jax says that Nelle did. Carly says she blames him too. Hopefully, Nelle got her revenge, and they can move on. She doesn’t know how she feels toward Jax. She understands that he did what he did because he loves Josslyn, but he left them wide open for a load of damage.

Valentin tells Anna that he was monstrous, and no woman wanted to sleep with him. Anna says she did, but he says he paid dearly. She says she was supposed to have him killed. He found the note the next morning with her orders. Valentin thought he could throw himself on his superior’s mercy, but he knew they’d never take his word over hers. She said she left the note on purpose, so he could get away. She was relieved when he was gone, because she didn’t have to follow through. She asks if he thinks she couldn’t have finished the job. She asks why she stalled. Valentin says he doesn’t know why she does anything, and is beyond caring. She says she liked him; she appreciated his brilliance and kind heart. She let him go because she knew he’d get away from her and whoever the WSB sent. She couldn’t follow up on that kind of betrayal.

Ava tells Lulu that Valentin took something important from her when he took Nicholas. She says that Lulu has to find Valentin’s Achilles heel before he finds hers. I would think for both of them, it’s Charlotte.

Dante finds Scotty in the evidence room. Scotty says that Dante almost gave him a heart attack, and Dante says he’ll try harder next time. Scotty claims he’s there for a client. Dante says their perp isn’t his client, but Scotty says he is. Dante takes him out, and the guy sitting there says he has public defender, and it’s not Scotty. Scotty says it must be a mistake. Dante’s phone rings. He says the public defender got held up in court. Scotty is all, exit stage left.

Michael tells Josslyn that he doesn’t really want to talk about Carly. He says they should admit they need each other. Josslyn says he always takes care of everyone, and who takes care of him? He says she does. He stupidly leaves his phone on the table.

Carly thanks Jax for the truth. He apologizes for it not being sooner, but she says there’s probably nothing they could have done. She talks about Sonny’s ultimatum, and says she doesn’t do well with those. Jax leaves.

Nelle tells Sonny that she’s building a new life, and he can’t scare her. He says he’s happy for the both of them. He doesn’t have to deal with her or get his hands dirty. He says Valentin won’t give a damn that she’s a kid. She says Valentin has been nothing but kind. Sonny says that if she pulls something, he’ll get rid of her and not care about her story, and that works for him.

Ava asks if Scotty got the pills. He says no, but he didn’t see them in the evidence room. He’s almost 100% sure. Ava says that’s not possible. Scotty says sometimes evidence goes missing; sometimes things like jewelry watches, and prescription meds just disappear. He says today is her lucky day.

Not quite. In the evidence room, Dante takes out the bag with the pills.

Valentin says if Anna let him go, it was out of pity. She asks him to remember the way it happened, and he’ll know. That night meant something to her the way it did to him. She takes his hand. No-no-no-no-no-no-no. Just no.

Michael gets his phone back. What was the purpose of this business? He calls Carly, and tells her he dropped Josslyn off at the end of the driveway, because she didn’t want to disturb anybody. He says he heard about Jax, and hopes she isn’t getting hopes up. Sonny walks into Kelly’s, and he’s like, what? Michael says he thinks Jax is staying with Carly.

Carly tells Josslyn she was worried. Josslyn says she had lunch with Michael and didn’t want to bother her and Jax.

Jax sees Nelle, and tells her that she’s wrong about Carly.

Tomorrow, Sonny grills Michael, Lulu isn’t okay, and Carly tells Bobbie that it was Jax.

The Real Housewives of NYC

So glad to see the ladies from my old stomping grounds back on the air. This season, Tinsley Mortimer joins the group. She was arrested for stalking an ex-boyfriend, so she should fit right in.

Sonja puts some plastic fruit in the dishwasher. Dorinda spends four dollars on two waters, and asks if the profit is four dollars. Fredrik Eklund visits Bethenny. She has her Tribeca apartment back, and thinks he might be able to sell it. No surprise, they disagree about the price. Fredrik does his victory dance in advance.

Dorinda meets Luann at the park. We can’t call her The Countess anymore. They discuss Luann’s upcoming wedding. In her interview, Luann tells us that her compatibility with Tom is magic. Only Dorinda is invited to the wedding, since she wants to avoid drama. We flash back to one of my favorite moments. Please don’t let it be about Tom; it’s about Tom. Luann complains to Dorinda about the other women. In her interview, Dorinda says it’s hard to get past the group being fractured, and we flash back to some nasty reunion moments. She hopes they can get past it as a group, but she’s not sure about Sonja. She’s been attacking Dorinda behind her back. Dorinda says it’s not going to end well.

Sonja is rehearsing Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man, a book that’s been made into a play. The director gives her some acting tips. It’s her final performance. Dorinda and Luann haven’t seen it, and Dorinda wonders if Sonja is trying to be relevant. Sonja’s also been chatting with an ex-girlfriend of Tom’s.

Ramona is redecorating and updating her apartment, and meets with the contractor. She has no plan, and says her place reflects that, which doesn’t exactly sound positive, but she’s not known for her turn of phrase. Except maybe “turtle time.” She asks the contractor if he has any single friends, and he actually has someone in mind. She tells him to pass along her number. He’s better than an app.

Bethenny and Fredrik go to the Tribeca apartment. Bethenny says when she first saw it, it was in bad shape. We revisit her crying over it. She says it seemed like a flophouse, making me wonder if this is the same woman who could barely pay her rent when this show started, since flophouse is a huge exaggeration. The apartment has been staged for showings, and Bethenny is thrilled. Fredrik is still trying to talk her into a lesser price, but she won’t budge, especially since there’s a private parking spot. In NYC, that alone is worth millions. Fredrik says it would be a record for the area, and she says she’s broken records before.

Carole and Adam are still together. Dorinda comes by for a visit. They have two new kittens! They’re seeing who gets along with Baby Carole’s dog. Carole says she feels like she’s living in a petting zoo. With three pets? That’s hardly a menagerie. Carole says that she and Adam are shacking up, because she thinks living together sounds too serious. Dorinda thinks Carole is in denial about the seriousness of her relationship. She says they’ve had a similar life in a lot of ways. Carole says she’s never been called a mean girl before, and Dorinda apologizes. Dorinda says she was nervous about coming over, and feels badly about them getting off track.

Dorinda tells Carole that she’s skipping the bachelorette stuff for Luann. She says John dancing around drunk would be more entertaining. I’m not so sure about that. Even if you’re not into male strippers, I’m sure the food will be phenomenal.

Bethenny visits Sonja, who has a cute dog and a new intern. Bethenny is picking up a donation for Dress for Success. Sonja shows her around, and Bethenny asks about Sonja’s daughter, who’s in boarding school. Sonja wants to sell the house, but she has attachments. They discuss Sonja’s play. She says she didn’t invite Luann, since she’s Tom absorbed. Bethenny thinks she should send Luann a fruit basket for taking out the trash. Sonja says she’s invited to the wedding but she’s going to be elsewhere. Bethenny says ditto. Hmm… I thought Luann said they weren’t invited?

Luann is at Tom’s amazing penthouse, and calls her wedding planner. She says her first wedding was in a courthouse wearing jeans, so she’s going all out this time. She’s carried the Countess torch for a long time, and is ready to put it down.

Sonja has tons of stuff for Bethenny. She gives Bethenny the stories behind her dresses. In her interview, she says it’s hard for her to give away clothes. Instead of being cleansing, it’s more like an enema. The purple dress is from when she dated Prince Albert of Monaco.

Bethenny explains how she ended up with two new puppies. Cookie is getting on in years, and Brynn has been asking for a puppy, but she couldn’t choose. She gets an email from Frederik with an all cash, full asking price offer on the apartment. That was quick. He tells her to call the bank and tell them to make room in the vault. She says slowly but surely, the pieces of her life are coming back together. The apartment has been a money-pit for the last four years. More like Jason Hippity Hoppy has been a money-pit.

Dorinda comes for a lunch date with Ramona, and has to wait for her to get back from her real date lunch date. They’re having lunch at Ramona’s apartment. She tells Dorinda that she’s starting to warm up to John. We flash back to sleazy, sweaty John, and Dorinda says there’s hope. Ramona says she’s seeing Luann tomorrow, and wonders why she wasn’t invited to the shower, since she’s always been the peacemaker. She thought they’d gotten past some things, and her feelings are hurt. Dorinda says she thinks Luann feels like Ramona conspired with Bethenny. She thinks Ramona should talk to her about it, but not be aggressive. Ramona says Luann is wondering what she knows about Tom, and she does know something. She doesn’t think Luann really wants to know though. She tells Dorinda about Luann hitting on a much younger guy, and finding out from the guy’s mother. She thinks Luann is going to get hurt, but Dorinda doesn’t want to hear about it.

Carole visits Bethenny. The puppies are super cute. Their names are Biggy and Smallz. Bethenny tells Carole about selling the apartment. Carole says she’s never seen the apartment, and Bethenny says she never will. They discuss the election, and Bethenny says that’s all Carole talks about 24/7. Bethenny says she’s in a vortex like a cat lady.

Luann meets Ramona for lunch. In her interview, she says Ramona has been calling Tom’s old girlfriends. She thinks Ramona should get a life, and stop concentrating on hers. They make small talk. Luann talks about the bridal shower, and Ramona asks why she wasn’t invited. Luann says she’s heard through friends that Ramona has been playing Nancy Drew, and being negative about her and Tom’s relationship. Ramona says people come to her, and asks if Luann wants to know. Luann says she doesn’t know what Ramona is talking about. Ramona starts talking, and Luann interrupts, asking if she’s talking about Tom meeting with an ex-girlfriend in California. She is, but says that the ex said they’d been making out and could have done more. Luann isn’t believing it, and says she isn’t listening to the fodder anymore. Ramona says she should be honest with herself, and she should tell Tom to reel it in, since the town is smaller than he realizes.

Ramona toasts to their marriage, and hopes Luann doesn’t fall on her face. Luann is like, thanks a lot, and Ramona says she doesn’t want Luann to get hurt. She says she wishes Luann every happiness, and Luann tells her to quit playing detective. In her interview, Luann says there’s a heart of gold in Ramona, you just have to dig for it. She tells Ramona that it’s going to be a special year.

Next time, Tinsley is introduced, Dorinda accuses Sonja of spreading lies, and Sonja confronts Luann about Tom.

NYC

 

 

Apr5

April 4, 2017 – Jax is Back, Alex Loses Custody, the Party Continues in Beverly Hills & Some Observations

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Carly finds Jax in her living room.

Tracy and Laura catch a couple of the monks trying to sneak out with the painting. Tracy says the painting is hers, but Laura says the painting is her. She thinks Tracy’s father must have bought it because it reminded him of her. Tracy says the monks were lying to them.

Hayden has a nightmare about Finn’s detox. When she wakes up, he’s coming out of the shower. He says last night was like an out-of-body experience. He can’t thank her enough for standing by him. She brushes him off, and he asks what’s the matter.

Andre asks Elizabeth how Jake feels about seeing a psychologist. She says he doesn’t hate it, but he’s not overly enthusiastic. She’s concerned about him shutting down if pressed about the island.

Jake finds Franco. He wonders when Franco is coming back, so they can finish their timelines.

Sam and Jason look at the footage from the gas station. Sam gets an alert about Julian’s credit card being used because she’s next of kin. She wonders if Julian is actually alive. I’m not positive about this, but I think if you’ve been declared dead, the credit card company will cancel your account. How is Sam getting alerts because she’s next of kin?

Amy 2.0 is at Kelly’s, speaking to someone on the phone about an outfit she’s putting together. Dillon interrupts her and asks if she’s that Amy.

Franco tells Jakes he has to work, but Jake can finish on his own. Jake says it’s not the same, and complains about having to see Andre. He asks if Franco can stick around. Franco says he wishes he could, but he can’t today. Jake is obviously disappointed.

Jason says Julian could be charged as an accessory, so if he was alive, he’d leave town. Sam says he’s probably right. Jason leaves for whatever he does, and Sam looks at the surveillance picture of a hooded guy.

Carly tells Jax that it’s been a rough few weeks but seeing him makes it better. Jax says he heard they caught Morgan’s killer, and Carly brings him up to speed. She says it’s a resolution, but now there’s no distraction. She tells him that he didn’t have to come all this way to check on her, and he tells her about Lady Jane dying, and that he wanted to tell Josslyn in person. She asks if he’s okay, and he says he doesn’t think it’s sunk in yet. Carly wants to go to Josslyn, but Jax says he thinks she wants privacy right now; they can both check on her later. Carly says when they were married, she felt more like a daughter to Lady Jane than an in-law. Jax says she’d always hoped they’d try again.

Tracy says the monks weren’t honest about the painting. She says why should she believe they don’t speak English, and she wants answers now. Another monk pops out and says she’ll receive them. Tracy asks if he’s in charge, and tells him that she was lied to about the painting. Laura asks if he knew J.L. Holt. He tells them about a man asking for asylum. He offered to compensate them, giving them artwork. The only painting he refused to part with was this one, because it reminded him of his daughter Tracy. He says the resemblance is amazing. She tells him they were estranged, and he gives her a letter that might explain things.

Finn wonders why Hayden is backing off, but there’s a knock at the door. It’s Curtis. He tells Finn he looks better, but it’s going to be tempting to get a quick fix to ease the pain to come. He tells Finn to stay strong and stay hydrated. He’s brought lunch, but Hayden says she has to go to work. Finn tells her that he couldn’t have done it without her. He moves in for a kiss, but she gives him a peck and leaves.

Andre tells Jason and Sam that they all have to be on the same page. Jake is his patient, not them, and it’s up to Jake what he wants to tell them about the sessions. He asks about their Helena concern. Elizabeth tells him about the timeline, and his time with Helena being blank, and then the scarecrow showing up later. Jason says they don’t know if it’s a memory or symbolic. Andre says not a detective, and it’s going to take time and patience.

Nathan goes to Sam and Jason’s place on official business. He tells Sam that Julian’s credit card was used to purchase a one-way bus ticket to Los Angeles. He asks if Julian ever talked to her about a plan to skip town.

Dillon says it’s Lord of the Rings Amy. He says he’s thought about her over the years, and talks about a Rings Q & A session that he went to. He says when he was going to ask a question, he thought of her, his high school friend, the only one who liked the movies as much as he did. She says she’s thought about him too. They’re planning a reunion, and Amy wants to get started brainstorming. Kiki walks in, and Dillon introduces them.

Jake wants to know why he can’t talk to Franco instead. Elizabeth says they don’t think it’s the best idea right now.  Jason tells him part of growing up is doing the right thing, even if it’s hard. Jake reluctantly goes in to his appointment.

Sam says if Julian had a master plan, he wouldn’t have told her. Nathan wonders about Lucas, but Sam says that’s’ a no. Nathan says whoever bought the ticket either found or stole Julian’s card. He wants to talk to Alexis, but Sam says she doesn’t know anything. Nathan says she might know something she doesn’t realize. AS soon as he’s gone, Sam picks up the phone.

Jax says sorry to hear about Carly and Sonny. He says Josslyn seemed to think they’re divorcing, and asks what happened. Carly says that Sonny’s grief drove him to sleep with another woman, and he lied to her for months. Jax says he can’t see her reaching the breaking point over a one-night stand. She saysit’s  not that he cheated, but who he cheated with.

The monk tells Tracy that her father wasn’t sure he’d see her again when he wrote the letter. Tracy opens it. Edward says he has many regrets about their relationship and how it turned out. He hopes this will rectify things. He says he was angry when made the changes to his will, and intended to add her back in, but there wasn’t enough time before he had to flee. He found the painting, and it reminded him of her strength, character, and heart. He tells her that if he doesn’t make it home, this gift is proof that in his heart, she’ll always be his little girl. This is his inheritance to her, and hopefully will prove that he loves and forgives her. Now she has to forgive herself. He’s sure she’ll know where best to put the painting.

Kiki asks if Amy and Dillon are film geeks, but Dillon says aficionados. Kiki doesn’t see the big deal about it, and Dillon says her loss. Amy says she has to get going, and Dillon says to text him. He says he’s glad they found each other again, and she says her too. Outside she gets all teary. She gets a call, and says it was like something from a movie until his beautiful girlfriend walked in. She thinks Kiki is wrong for Dillon, since she doesn’t even like Game of Thrones. Seriously. What’s wrong with her?

Dillon tells Kiki he thought he was co-chair  for the reunion with someone he’d never met, but he’s glad it’s Amy. Kiki talks about her volunteer work, saying she picked her boss’s brain, but she still has questions. She says she just signed up for a training course to be a nurse’s aid, and they’ll see where it goes from there. They start to kiss, but Franco interrupts.

Tracy tells Laura that she didn’t think her father forgave or trusted her. Laura says nothing would have stopped him from loving her, and he was proud of her. Tracy wants to take the painting home, but the monk says he can’t let her do that.

Sam tells Alexis that she’s booked a hotel overnight for her, so she can get away for a minute. When she hangs up, she says, sorry, Nathan isn’t questioning Alexis today.

At the hospital, Elizabeth asks Hayden how Finn is. Hayden says fine, but Elizabeth says she doesn’t sound like it. Hayden says she doesn’t want to talk, but Elizabeth says she’s the only one who knows what Hayden is going through.

Finn thanks Curtis, who says to thank Hayden, who got him involved. He says she clearly thinks a lot of him. Finn says she wouldn’t even make eye-contact this morning, and it seemed like something scared her off. Curtis asks if he remembers anything, and Finn asks what he did.

Hayden shows Elizabeth the bruises on her arm from where Finn grabbed her. Elizabeth asks if she thinks it could happen again, but Hayden says it was totally the coming down. She tells Elizabeth that bruises heal, but she’s concerned that Finn was able to zero in on her insecurities. Elizabeth says she can’t take it personally, and that she went through that with Lucky. Hayden asks how they bounced back, and Elizabeth says they didn’t. Instead, Lucky bounced all the way to Europe. She tells Hayden that Finn’s journey is far from over, but she has one of her own and it’s okay to make herself a priority.

Kiki asks Franco if it can wait. He says no. He’s having feelings, and needs to deal with them now. He feels like he can help Jake, and doesn’t want to be the reason that Jake turns out like Franco.

Andre asks if Jake likes action figures, and brings out a box of them. Jake takes out the scarecrow and wicked witch from The Wizard of Oz. Andre tells him to tell a story. Jake says in his story, the scarecrow and witch are friends.

Hayden comes back to Finn’s room. Curtis has left, and Finn jokes that in the last five minutes he hasn’t used. Hayden says they have to talk, and Finn says Curtis filled him in. He says he’s sorry he was physical with her. She says he scared her, not just physically, but emotionally. He said some harsh things that he doesn’t remember, but she says the thoughts must be in his head. She says he has a long road ahead, but she can’t walk it with him.

Tracy says the monastery has no claim to painting. The monk says her father never returned. The monastery is having a difficult time; there are too many people and too little money. They have a private buyer for the painting who’s willing to give them $20 million. It’s enough to fund the abbey and their charitable works for many years. Laura says it’s a good deed and an inspiration. Tracy says, hell no.

Carly tells Jax the Nelle story. She says she could forgive Sonny if he’d told her the truth. Jax wonders why Nelle would set Sonny up, and Carly says that Frank Benson was Nelle’s father. Jax looks disturbed, and we already know where this is going. Carly tells him that Sonny played her right into Nelle’s revenge. Jax says he’s sorry, and it’s all his fault.

Laura reminds Tracy that she’s in a monastery. The monk says he understands that she has emotional attachments to the painting. Tracy says she could no more give up the painting than a piece of her heart.

Hayden tells Finn about what he said to her. He says it was the drugs talking, but she says it was the truth. She knows what the town thinks about her, and convinced herself that he was the exception. She gives him a list of rehabs. He says he doesn’t want help from others, just her. She says he needs help from someone he trusts, and made it clear that it’s not her, and walks out.

Jake asks to use Elizabeth’s phone while she and Jason talk to Andre. Andre tells them that Jake is a private kid, and it’s going to take a while. He says Jake is sensing tension between them and knows that his time on the island is at the root of it. If they want him to open up, they need to make peace and make sure they’re ready for the truth.

Franco thinks Jake has darkness buried inside. Kiki says he has to respect that Jake isn’t his son and it’s not his call. Franco’s phone rings. It’s Jake, who tells him it was weird, and he wants to finish timelines. Franco says his mom or dad should help him finish it.

Curtis drops by to see Sam. She tells him about the credit card, and he asks if she thinks it’s Julian. She says if there’s even a remote possibility that he’s alive, Alexis will hang on to it. They need to find out who used the card.

Carly says nothing is Jax’s fault. He tells her he made the deal for the kidney.

Tomorrow, Anna bugs Valentin again, Carly asks why Jax didn’t tell her, Sonny tells Nelle to be more careful, and Lulu tells Dante she made a new friend.

If Loving You is Wrong

Travis tells Kelly to turn the car off, and she tells him to get out. He grabs her by the hair, and tells her to turn it off. She does. Wow. This guy’s personality sure has changed. He grabs Kelly, pulling her into the back seat. She asks him why he’s doing this. He says he tried going on with his life, but she wouldn’t let him. She says she didn’t know he was like this. Us neither. He asks why she was at the police station, and she keeps telling him to get out. He tries to put his hand up her skirt, and she whacks him a good one.

Travis says he can make her feel good. Then he tells her she’s sick, and gets out of the car. She locks the doors, and gets back in the front. She sees him watching as she pulls away.

Randal visits his mother at the hospital. Louise says she’s been worried sick about him. He tells her he’s sorry, and she says it’s all right. Louise asks if they hurt him, and he says he’s fine. She asks how he got away, and he tells her the FBI came. Louise says that Marcie called them; she’s worried about him. This confuses Randal, but that’s probably not too hard. Louise says they’ve both made mistakes and they have to forgive each other. Randal says he can’t forgive her. When he looks at her, all he sees is her and Brad in the shed. Louise says he did the same thing with Alex, and she’s the one who sent those people to the house. He says they’re all dead now, and she says, thank God it’s over. Randal says it’s not, as long as she’s hurt. She says she’s fine and that the both of them did this. She’s not standing for it; it’s time for him to let it go. Those words aren’t in Randal’s vocabulary, and he says it’s just starting. He tells her that he’ll see her after the hearing. Louise can’t believe he’s still after the baby. He says he’ll be back with her grandson, and she says after all this, it’s not enough. She supposes she’ll be going to a funeral. She tells him she loves him, and he leaves.

Doctor Ross introduces herself to Marcie, and confirms her pregnancy. She’s twelve and a half weeks along. Dr. Ross asks if her husband is excited, but Marcie says she can’t believe it. She’d had fibroids and the doctor said it was less than 10% of a chance. Marcie is concerned that she’d been drinking, but the doctor says so far, everything seems normal. She says that Marcie doesn’t seem happy, and Marcie says she’s got a lot going on. She says Marcie should be happy after all the time and effort she’s put into it.

Back at the apartment, Marcie tells Brad to stop with the cold shoulder. He says that he needs time to process everything. She says she’s sorry for going to the police, but he says it’s not that. He wants her to stop antagonizing Alex; she’s been through too much. He saw her screaming for her child and saw her parents get killed in front of her. He asks how much more she has to suffer. Marcie can’t believe he’s coming to Alex’s defense, and he says she doesn’t know him. She wonders how long he’s going to punish her for making a mistake, and he says that’s not what he’s doing. Marcie says he still loves Alex, and Brad says she still loves Randal, so stop giving him a hard time about loving Alex. Marcie says that she told him to go back to her, and not to punish her for falling in love with him. Oh, no, just no. She says she didn’t mean to. She just wanted the pain to go away and for Alex and Randal to pay. She says she knows he doesn’t feel the same way, but he says he does. He says she’s made it clear she doesn’t want him though. She says she didn’t, but when she’s with him, she’s happy, and he makes her feel alive and cared for. He makes her feel strong and safe. He says that’s not love, but she insists it is. She asks what they do now, but Brad doesn’t know. I’m confused. Do they both love two people or was that first part just a cover-up for their real feelings?

Natalie sits by Joey’s bedside. The doctor says he’s looking much better, but Joey says he doesn’t feel better. He wants to know about Faun. The doctor says she left already and she’s fine; she was only grazed. He says he’ll be back later.

Lushion joins them. He asks how Joey is doing, and Joey says better, now that he found out Faun is okay. Natalie says she’s going home, and she’ll see them later. Lushion says he’ll let Joey res,t and leaves with Natalie.

Natalie tells Lushion she’s relieved and tired. She says they have to get their move on, since the apartment has been rented. Lushion realizes that she went off on the landlord, and she says they never fixed anything, so she told them to stick the apartment.

Officer Rick asks Esperanza what she knows about Kelly. She asks if he’s interested in her, and he says no, and points out Travis sitting on a bench in the station. He says that Travis just made out a complaint that Kelly is harassing him. Esperanza says he’s lying, and that Kelly isn’t a psychopath. He says okay, but she doesn’t like the tone of his okay, and says this is crazy.

Esperanza calls Kelly, and leaves a message to call her back. Rick tells Lushion about finding a dead body – Ramsey – and that he was stabbed to death. Lushion asks if there are any leads. Rick says no, but they think it’s a crime of passion. Rick tells him that he’ll have the keys later, and Lushion asks him not to say anything to Natalie. Rick asks if Kelly is the type to harass a man, and Lushion says no.

Esperanza calls Kelly, but Kelly says she can’t talk. Essie tells her that Travis is filing a restraining order. Kelly says she still has to file hers, and Essie tells her do it quickly or it will look like a copycat thing. She asks Kelly what’s wrong, and Kelly says nothing. She tells Essie she’s sitting outside Justice’s school and his science project is ruined. It’s been squashed into oblivion by Travis. She tells Essie she’s embarrassed. Lushion calls Kelly, and she says she’ll call Essie back.

Lushion asks Kelly if Travis is still bothering her. Kelly asks why. What I want to know is why Kelly isn’t letting anyone know what’s going on. Lushion says he needs a favor, and tells her he’s sorry about Ramsey. He asks her to keep the murder from Natalie. He says she won’t move in if she finds out, and they’ve already put the money down. I guess Natalie never reads the paper or listens to the news. Kelly says she won’t say anything. Lushion thanks her, and says he’ll be her next door neighbor soon. They hang up, and Kelly cries in her car. She drives away.

Steven calls Lushion into his office. Eddie is already there. Steven says he just finished Eddie’s report, and needs a witness. Lushion says he didn’t hear what Eddie said. Eddie goes over how they saw Andrew’s car, but no Andrew. Lushion starts to say something, but Steven says he has this. He asks Eddie why the window was shot out, and Eddie says he doesn’t know and makes some nasty remarks. Lushion says he doesn’t get it, and Eddie calls him Mr. FBI. Lushion tells him to quit trying to deflect. Steven wants Lushion to sign it, but he says get someone else. Steven tells him he’s the subordinate, and Lushion says he doesn’t care. He says this idiot – pointing at Eddie – did something to Andrew. Eddie threatens to bring hell back to his doorstep, and when he says Natalie’s name, Lushion gets crazy. Steven is like, whoa, and Lushion says he’s not signing. Steven tells Lushion to go.

Steven tells Eddie that he’s hotheaded and unreliable. When something goes wrong, he wants to kill everybody, and it doesn’t work that way. He tells Eddie to forget about Lushion being FBI. He says he’s over doing what they’ve been doing, and he wants something big – Escada. Eddie says can’t touch him, but Steven says that was his old man. Julius Junior is a hothead like Eddie, and he’s going to slip up. Eddie says this is too big of a decision for Steven to make, and he wants nothing to do with Escada. Steven asks if Eddie is cool with Julius fooling around with Esperanza. Eddie waits a beat, but says he’s cool. Steven wants to set something up. If Julius doesn’t cut them in, they’ll take him down. Eddie asks if he’s lost his mind. Steven says he wants a shipment, something big. Eddie works the streets, and somebody knows something. If they make this move, Lushion is either fired, transferred, or shot. Eddie says to let him pull the trigger, and Steven says him first. Eddie goes back out to the main office.

Lushion and Eddie have a stare down, but eventually get back to pretending to work.

At the hearing, Alex hasn’t shown up yet. She runs in the door, and the judge tells her to sit. He asks if she has counsel, but she says she can’t afford an attorney. He says the father claims that the child is in danger in her home. Alex says he isn’t, and Randal says he was kidnapped. The judge tells him he’ll get his turn. Alex says he was, and the judge is like, by your parents? She says yes, and says she was outside, and they broke in and took him. He asks what’s to stop them from doing it again, and she says they’re dead. The judge is surprised that the report is less than 24-hours old, and Alex tells him they were killed by the FBI. He mentions that her father was a racist, and she says that’s not her. Well, you’d think this would be a given, since obviously she had an affair with Randal. The judge reads out loud about Alex’s mother dropping the baby into a lake infested with alligators. He becomes more astounded as he reads, which is making me laugh. He says when he read it, he thought it must be an exaggeration, and Randal says it happened. The judge wonders how he can allow the baby to go home with his mother, and Alex says he’s her son. The Judge says that’s no guarantee of safety. Alex insists that she won’t let any harm come to him. The judge continues about how Brad threatened to kill Randal and that he can’t allow a child to be with Alex’s husband. She says they’re separated, and Randal says that Brad was at the house earlier.

Alex begs for the judge to listen. She says she’d never allow harm to come to her son. He says that he understands, but does she? She says her husband saved the baby. The judge says that proves they’re still in contact, and rules in Randal’s favor. Alex says he’s not the biological father.

Next time, Kelly’s baby daddy’s mother pays a visit, Randal isn’t letting anything go, and Natalie tells Kelly to pull the trigger.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Did they run out of material? We’re seeing a retrospective of the season. I concentrate on the earrings I haven’t noticed before. We begin where we ended last week, with Dorit saying that LisaR is unpredictable, and she doesn’t know what Lisa is capable of.

Meanwhile, back at LisaV’s Diamonds and Rosé Party, Dorit grills LisaV and PK as to whether she’s ever said that LisaR has a drug problem. In her interview, LisaV wonders which LisaR we’re getting tonight. Silly chit-chat happens. LisaR makes snarky comments about LisaV in her interview, which makes me not like her.

On the other hand, Eileen says she’s softening toward LisaV, and realizing she has feelings and a heart. This isn’t exactly endearing, but an improvement. Dorit has some kind of gold leaf in her hair, and LisaR says that it looks like a gold goose took a crap on Dorit’s head. I’m forced to laugh and agree, even though I don’t want to. Of course everyone looks fabulous, and so does the food, and the décor, and everything. Kevin Lee is rocking a tapestry rose patterned suit, reminding me of the purple paisley suit my friend Tommy wore to my wedding. Camille is here! Kim shows up too, and she looks the best I’ve seen in quite a while. She gushes over being a grandma, and of course, has pictures.

LisaR says Eden didn’t back her up on the Hong Kong trip, which is fine, but she doesn’t trust her. She tells Eden she’s “confused,” and wonders why Eden didn’t step in and say that Lisa doesn’t have a drug problem. Eden says she kind of shut down. Eileen says not saying something makes things worse. Quick, let me write that down. In her interview, Eden says that LisaR has awkward, evil energy. That’s one way to put it. I’d probably just say she’s an a-hole.

Erika is wearing a pink wig and a black cat suit, adorned with faux diamonds. They sit down to dinner, and LisaV toasts to everyone, thanking them for coming. They’re serenaded by some guy with a guitar. Aww! The ponies have faux diamonds and pink bows in their manes. For all I know, they might be real diamonds.

Dorit tells Kim about LisaR’s behavior at the Hong Kong dinner. She talks about Lisa asking if she trusts her husband, and suggests that Lisa is projecting. Kim says that Lisa is erratic and mean; exhibiting vicious behavior and then regret. In her interview, Kim says Lisa spins things and turns them around so she’s the victim.

The ladies discuss having babies over dessert. LisaV comes by with some fancy caviar things on a long, thin tray. The ladies visit with the ponies, who also have glitter on their hooves. Everyone is dazzled. Erika gets on the swing. LisaV asks if she has underwear on. <sigh>

Everyone mingles outside as the guitarist plays. Kim talks to LisaV about the Hong Kong dinner, and asks where it ends with LisaR. Kim says it isn’t her problem, but she’s been there. Well, it wasn’t that long ago. We spy LisaR, and LisaV suggests Kim talk to her. Kyle wants to know where the escape route is. LisaR is reluctant to approach the group.

Erika dares LisaR to mingle with Kim. Lisa tells Eileen that Kim said she’d heard things. She figures that it must have to do with what she said about PK. Eileen calls Kyle over, and tells her to bring Kim.

Eileen tells Kyle that she thought they were done with this. Kyle says it’s about what LisaR said about PK. PK says they’re all lying liars who lie, and Dorit tells LisaV there’s tension in the air. Dorit thinks she needs to join them, and Lisa says she’ll go with her. I love how arguments between two people always turn into a group effort.

LisaR asks Dorit what she needs to say. Dorit says that Lisa was mean-spirited in Hong Kong, and wants to know where it came from. Lisa says Dorit was saying she had a Xanax problem. Eden gets dragged in, and Dorit says she never said that Lisa had a problem. LisaV says that LisaR put it out there. In her interview, Erika says no party is complete without a catfight. Eden says Dorit asked her if LisaR had a problem, and we flash back to their conversation. LisaR says there it is! like she’s just found Excalibur.  Dorit says her extreme accusations weren’t nice. Lisa says those were her observations, and LisaV says she doesn’t think so. Kim says she’s gone after a pretty long list of people. In her interview, LisaR takes no responsibility for anything, and owns nothing. She insists she tells the truth, and tells Dorit she’s all over the place. Dorit say she never had an issue with her. Lisa gets in her face, and Dorit tells her to take a step back; if she can smell Lisa’s breath, she’s too close.

LisaR asks why Dorit didn’t call her and talk to her. Dorit asks why she would, since Lisa acts like a nutter. Lisa says, no, you. Dorit brings up the dinner again. Lisa tells her that what she did to Erika was disgusting. Dorit says she made every attempt to right things. Erika says she called her cold, and Dorit says she is. Erika says if the shoe was on the other foot, would she warm up to the other person? Dorit says she would, and Erika says tha’s not a normal response. Dorit says Erika has been called cold by other people, and LisaV says that Dorit apologized. Erika claims she didn’t, and we flash back to when she did. Erika says she’s grateful, but she doesn’t remember. Dorit “reminds” her of insisting she make PK apologize as well. Erika says she’s done nothing, but Dorit talks sh*t about her. Dorit says Erika doesn’t know who she is.

PK joins the group. He’s the Peter of Beverly Hills. Erika asks if he’d ever said she tried to seduce him. He says no, and says he’s not appreciating watching his wife get ganged up on. He calls Erika inherently cold. He says that Dorit made a joke, and then she apologized, so at what point is it over? Erika says Dorit always has ugly things to say, when she’s been nothing but nice. PK says she’s delusional, and Erika says they haven’t been nice to her. They get stupid, and go back and forth because he calls her honey. Everyone stands around and watches.

Eileen says that Erika isn’t cold. In her interview, she says she can’t imagine Vincent being so “inherently” rude and classless. PK says he didn’t think Erika flashed him on purpose, and Dorit says neither did she. Kyle asks if he thinks Erika was coming on to him, and he says no. Dorit says the only time it came up, is when Eileen brought it up. PK says he doesn’t get it. Eileen tells everyone to stop, and PK leaves. Erika tells Dorit she wants to be friends and let it go. She says it was embarrassing for her. Dorit says if either one of them thought she was that person, they’d never have invited her anywhere. Erika says the underwear thing hurt her feelings, and Dorit apologizes again.

Under the tent, LisaV says she feels like she can’t come to Dorit’s defense without getting bothered about it. Ken makes an inappropriate joke.

Erika says it’s nice to see Dorit being authentic. She wants to have a genuine connection, but says it will be slow. They both say they’re good.

Eden feels that she and LisaR have gone up and down, but Lisa is never present in the friendship. LisaR says that once Eden talked to LisaV, her guard went up and they were done. Nice of her to let Eden know. Eden says she’s given LisaR her energy and heart, and she doesn’t even know her. For her to say they’re done because of that is the worst, and she’s tired of being used as Lisa’s scapegoat when she’s been there for her. Snotrag Lisa says she didn’t ask Eden to be there for her. Eden is yelling and really upset, and says God forbid that Lisa should be there for her. If Lisa says “wow” one more time, I’m going to scream.

Eden storms off. In her interview, Eden can’t believe that she and LisaR were still talking and even going on vacation together, and Lisa didn’t let her know they were done. LisaV follows Eden. Eileen thinks that Eden felt dismissed by everyone. Erika bids everyone good night. Eden tells LisaV what happened. LisaV says she doesn’t need to be loved by everyone. Erika says she’s protective, but everyone has seen she’s human.

LisaR doesn’t take responsibility for anything, but wishes Eden well. In her interview, Eileen says she shouldn’t assume that when she wants to clear the air, that everyone else does too. Lisa says that her words aren’t always appropriate, but there’s always truth in them. I don’t suppose she’ll ever get that being honest doesn’t mean just saying whatever pops into your head.

This was the finale, but there were no interesting what they’re doing now things. With the exception of Erika coming back to The Young and the Restless, and doing Dancing with the Stars. However, there were some worthy parting words. Ever the optimist, LisaV tells us that love and laughter will supersede all, even with this group. And Kyle thinks that if everyone would take more time to get to know one another before judging, they would realize they have more in common than not.

Amen, sista, but next time is the reunion. All those hearts and flowers are going to fly right out the window.

A Few Observations

🍑 Is it me or are the Atlanta Wives on more than the others?

💋 On Little Women: LA, the Briana/Matt saga goes on, this time with Briana’s best friend Lisa telling the ladies that Matt drunk texted her about a dream he had involving the two of them. Lisa tried to tell Briana, who only got upset that Lisa didn’t tell her sooner. Oh, for the love of all that’s holy, dump that guy already. There were more fabulous earrings, and Terra explained the different types of dwarfism very well. They don’t know about D’Artagnan yet. We also found out that one of Elena’s twins has her type of dwarfism. She’s upset about the ladies choosing the taller brother later in life, but Preston thinks they’ll both wow the girls.

🍸 Southern Charm will be starting a Savannah edition on Monday, May 8th at 10 pm. Do we need this? I already don’t like the people as much as the ones in Charleston, but maybe they just took me by surprise.

🌟 I was thinking about my fascination with reading recipes, looking at pictures of food, and watching cooking shows, and came up with my own quote: Those who can’t do, read about it.

 

Mar29

March 28, 2017 – Anna’s Truth is Revealed, Alex is Back in Maxine, the Wives Return from Hong Kong & Thoughts

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Obrecht gives Anna a folder containing everything she wanted to know about Valentin, but was afraid to ask.

Ned asks if Tracy is okay. He just told her that Michael might be costing her money, and she didn’t react. She says everything is fine, but she has to go. He wonders why she’s being purposely vague. He asks if she’s hiding something, and says don’t tell him she’s meeting with Larry.

Alexis hears something and thinks it’s Julian. She opens the door, but there’s nothing and no one there. She definitely dipped into that vodka. About three fourths is gone. She says if Julian is still alive, here’s his chance to stop her from drinking. She pours another, and says that’s what she thought. There’s a knock at the door.

Sonny asks if Lucy can wait. She says she doesn’t mean to interrupt, but she has to speak with both of them. It’s about their son. She says she’s gone back and forth about it, but has finally decided. Ava comes dashing in, saying that she wants to talk to Sonny about Avery’s education, even though she’s like two years old. Lucy says they were discussing their son. Ava goes on about Michael, and how she knows he hasn’t been able to contribute as much to the Nurses Ball. She says the Jerome Gallery is willing to make up the difference. Sonny tells Lucy she can count on him anytime, just not right now. (Well, that isn’t any time then, is it Sonny?) Ava tells Sonny that they can talk another day, and she’ll use this time to talk to Lucy. Ava and Lucy leave, and Carly is like, what was that?

Ned tells Tracy that the last time she met Larry, she ended up with worms in her brain. She reminds Ned that Larry said what he has to talk about is connected to her father, but Ned says that Larry knows that’s her Achilles’s heel, and he’s planning another con. She says on the outside chance it’s not a con, she has to find out. He says he hopes she’s prepared to be taken for a ride.

At least Alexis is smart enough to put the bottle in the cupboard this time. It’s Valentin. He asks if he can come in, and she wonders what happens if she says no. He tells her that would be rude, and she says they can’t have that. He asks for a drink, but she says that would indicate that she wants him to stay. He asks if she prefers to drink alone.

Obrecht tells Anna about Valetin sending messages to an encrypted account, and makes her swear not to use the information to hunt down Britt. She gives Anna the folder, saying she’s glad that Anna is as flawed and imperfect as the rest of them. Anna tells her that she can go now, and Obrecht says, you’re welcome. Yeah, really.

Tracy goes to Larry’s room, but decides Ned is right. Larry answers and she tells him she’s leaving. He says that he swiped her company credit card by mistake, and she’s paying for the room. He tells her if she’s not interested, he’ll go, but it’s a matter of the utmost importance to her family.

Ned is picking Olivia-F up for the movies, but she’s running late. He asks if she’s okay, and she says no. She tells him she has a proposal, but not that kind. He’s been more a father to Leo than Julian, and she thinks he should make it official and legally become Leo’s father. Ned says he can’t do that.

Alexis asks why Valentin is there. He gives her his condolences for her husband’s death. He says he had personal matters to deal with, but now he wants to make good on a promise – the keys to the Cassadine estate.

Anna shows Andre an email to her from Faison. She doesn’t understand why it the order to kill Valentin was issued in her name, but gets why it happened. He was to be taken out because of classified information falling into the wrong hands. The bureau was compromised, and agents were killed. Andre asks if Valentin was a double-agent. Anna says she doesn’t know, but the information wasn’t turned over by him – it was her.

Tracy tells Larry to start talking, and how is this connected to her family? He says Turkey, referring to the country. He’d been hopping across Europe, and his companion wanted to visit auction house in Turkey. One particular painting caught his eye. Another piece of the artist’s work had been appraised at $20 million, but he found out the painting belonged to someone else, and the house had no right to broker it. Imagine his surprise when he found out the owner was J.L. Holt, an alias of her father’s.

Ava says she’ll donate whatever Lucy needs. Lucy says they need money for everything, since one of their regular donors isn’t liquid. Ava says okay, and also wants Lucy’s silence. She writes a figure down, and Lucy says, wow, so cute, but they need another zero. She says it is for a worthy cause, showing Ava the bottle in her purse.

Sonny asks if Carly really wants to do this now with all the interruptions. She says he told her they haven’t had a real marriage in a long time. She doesn’t know when, or if, she can move past Nelle. He says he can’t keep doing the back and forth. She asks what he’s saying, and he tells her that if she’s not going to give them a chance, they’re done.

Laura tells Lulu that the Corrinthos family has no use for Nelle, but she thinks that Nelle has feelings for Michael. Nelle could be their way to outmaneuver Valentin.

Anna tells Andre that Valentin was questioned, and claimed he was tasked with a special assignment, and that Anna had requested the information that was leaked. He disappeared soon afterward, and the bureau thought it was his attempt to shift blame. Andre says everyone knows she wouldn’t sell out the bureau, but Anna says she would.

Valentin says Charlotte could use some relatives, and is about Danny’s age. Alexis thinks he’s trying to show he’s a good daddy, and maybe get some shared custody strategy from Diane. He says he had no siblings growing up, and wants things to be different for Charlotte. Alexis says that Charlotte has a sibling, Rocco, and he should start there. He takes out the vodka, opens the bottle, and tosses the cap to her, putting the bottle down. He leaves, and she takes her glass back out. There’s another knock at the door. Alexis doesn’t bother hiding anything, thinking it’s Valentin again, but it’s Julian.

Tracy tells Larry that she remembers her father running off to lead a different life for a couple of years. Larry says he had exquisite taste in art and always knew the value ahead of time. He informed the house that he knew the owner. They had been trying to track him down, and assumed he was dead. Larry says that the painting belongs to Edward’s heirs, and it could be returned for quid pro quo. He says the painting is worth $20 million, and they could split it. Tracy balks at paying $10 million for a painting her family already owns. He says without his knowledge, she has little to go on. Tracy says Ned told her he’d try to con her again, and she’s not playing. As she’s walking away, he tells her to think about what her father would want.

Ned asks Olivia-F what they’re doing. They’ve been dating off and on for three years, and he helped raise Leo. He’s not good enough to marry, but she wants him to be Leo’s father. Olivia tells him to look around. Everyone’s marriages are falling apart. It’s like a marriage license is a guarantee of breaking up.

Andre says that Anna’s record speaks for itself, and Anna tells him that it’s been strategically edited. She graduated with high marks got a plum assignment. She was immature and arrogant, and thought she was smarter than the system. If the DVX would pay for information, why not accept it? If she was going to risk her life, she deserved compensation. She thought she was worldly, but she was naïve. That’s how she talked herself into being a double-agent. People died, and she had to go underground, and couldn’t even raise her own child. Andre says that doesn’t sound like her, but she says that he’s wrong. It’s not who she is today, but it was then. Andre says she judges herself too harshly, and wonders if Valentin is lying. She says maybe they were both lied to.

Julian says he had the feeling Alexis might be drinking again, and came to stop her from making a mistake. She says no, and closes the door, but now he’s inside. Everywhere she turns, she sees him. She says too late, she’s been drinking all day, but he says it’s never too late to stop. She tells him that he has no right telling her what to do. She says that she read his letter, and he says protecting her. Alexis says had Julian told her the truth, maybe she wouldn’t be drinking in the first place.

Ava tells Lucy that she doesn’t have that kind of money. Lucy says maybe Sonny and Carly will come forward. Ava asks for a couple of days, but Lucy says her budget has to be ready in the morning, so she needs the cash by tonight. If not, they have a problem.

Sonny says that he and Carly are in a strange limbo. She asks who put them there? He says she keeps dangling forgiveness in front of him and taking it away, and asks if their marriage is worth fighting for. She says he’s doing it again. He lied, and now he’s giving her an ultimatum because she’s not forgiving him. If he wants to end the marriage, fine with her.

Tracy says she’s going to find the painting herself. She sees Ava and Lucy talking. Lucy tells Ava that as soon as the funds are confirmed, the pills are hers. Lucy leaves, and Ava wonders where she’s getting that kind of money on such short notice. Tracy joins her at the bar, saying she needs help about a painting.

Carly tells Sonny that if they’d had a marriage, he would have warned her about Nelle. He demands honesty, but his first instinct is to lie, and she refuses to be shut out again. He says she’s always known his business is about secrets. She says that she tried to trust him, but he lets things come to boiling point and it explodes. He tells her that he’s let her in more than anyone, and wonders why she focuses on what he can’t do.

Lulu tells Laura that Dante talked to Michael about Nelle, and he seemed furious with her. Really? I didn’t take him as being “furious.” Laura says it didn’t seem that way to her, and if Nelle wants to be back in his good graces, she should endear herself to Lulu and Dante. Lulu asks if Laura thinks that Nelle wouldn’t alienate her.

Anna goes to Valentin and says that he had the information that the DVX wanted, and he tells her that he was interrogated about it. She thinks they’ve both been played

Alexis tells Julian that she spent months trying to understand who he’d become, and she couldn’t process it because he kept her in the dark.  She lost her husband, her law license, and her self-respect because he didn’t give her the facts. Julian says he did what he did to keep her safe. She says he’s not really there and she’s just imagining it; what he’s saying is what she wants to hear. He says she’s right. He’s in her mind, which means it’s not him, but her, telling herself to put the bottle down.

Julian says he’s a manifestation of what she already knows. She needs to get back to AA. What would her daughters say, and what about getting her license back? She has too much to live for. She says not with him, and he tells her a little piece of him will always be in her heart. She’s about to kiss him, when he disappears. She pours out the rest of Rolo’s vodka. Is Rolo’s really a thing, or are they making that up? It sounds like something that’s $4.99 a gallon.

Ned tells Olivia-F that they’re going to The Floating Rib tonight, and he’s proposing again. However she responds is what he’ll accept as her final answer.

Ava asks Tracy what she needs. Tracy says painting by Renaissance master that was owned by her family, but left in Turkey. If anyone can help find it, it’s Ava. Ava says she can, for a price.

Carly says she has to forgive Sonny and accept his lies, and he gets to decide what she can know; it’s marriage on his terms. He says she’s twisting it. He’d give his life for her, but he’s never pretending to be what he isn’t, and if who he is doesn’t work for her, there’s the door. Cold Sonny. Can’t blame him though. She says this is her walking out, and she’s not coming back. She leaves, and Sonny smashes a glass against the wall.

Laura doesn’t think they can use Nelle to get visitation, and Lulu asks how is she an advantage then? Laura isn’t sure yet, but tells Lulu to make friends with her. When Valentin tries to do something to sabotage them (like he has to; they do well enough on their own), Nelle will be a witness. Lulu wonders if she’ll have an ally or a spy.

Valentin says one of them got played, but it wasn’t Anna. He says he was a rising star, and she dragged him down. She persuaded him to give her information for what she said was a special assignment. She says there must have been a third party, but Valentin says she asked him herself – after they slept together. DUN-DUN-DUNN!

Tomorrow, Amy 2.0 gets a chance to shine, Nina talks to Griff, and Ava tells Tracy she’s got it.

If Loving You is Wrong

Since my internet connection is down, I’m just capsulizing this. Long sad story and day. Maybe you’ll like it better. Maybe I will. I just want my internet back. <SOB!>

Kelly is questioned about Ramsey at the station. The questions seem a bit intrusive and I’m wondering about the officer. Okay, seriously now, he just asked why she wasn’t dating him. That doesn’t sound like the kind of question they’d be asking. It would be great if they’d tell us how he died. He also gives her the report on Travis to give to her lawyer.

Kelly sees Travis at the station and acts ignorant. He asks her a bunch of ridiculous questions, and after acting like he doesn’t know why he was called there, says that they want to talk to him about Ramsey. He’s so stupid, he grabs Kelly, and then tells the officer that she’s a liar. Some girl joins him, and claims that Kelly sends text messages to him, and he shows them his phone. He makes up a bunch of other lies, saying that Kelly is a jealous, scorned ex. The supposed new girlfriend says they’ve been praying for her, and Kelly suggests they pray for Travis. I don’t think the officer is buying all this, but he tells them to stay away from each other. Kelly talks to Esperanza while she’s there. Essie is concerned that Kelly will be a suspect.

Andrew is nowhere to be found, and Steven questions Eddie. Steven acts like he’s all down with Eddie. Eddie tells him about Lushion being FBI, but Steven gives him a file saying Lushion is too much of an idiot to be FBI. Eddie insists that Steven knows nothing, and says he’ll call the FBI himself. Like the FBI will just give up this information to a stranger.

Steven tells Lushion that they just need one more piece – I assume he means evidence—and everything will be cleared up.

The hospital is keeping Alex and Randal’s baby for the night. He had water in his lungs, and they want to make sure it doesn’t turn into pneumonia. Someone from child welfare asks them what happened. Randal tells her that Alex’s mother dropped him in the lake, and Alex tries to explain. Randal keeps putting in his two cents, and Alex keeps telling him to shut up. He says that right about now, her parents should be burning in hell, which is enough for the child welfare woman to say they’re keeping him. When she’s gone, Alex tells Randal that she wishes they’d killed him. He says unfortunately for her, they didn’t.

The officer questions Travis, and asks if he’ll do a DNA test. He agrees, but then prattles on about how Kelly won’t leave him alone, and even tells her son that Travis is his father. I have the feeling the officer isn’t picking up what Travis is putting down. He asks more questions about Ramsey, and tells Travis not to leave town and to stay away from Kelly. Before he leaves, Travis asks to pray for the officer. As he’s praying, the officer looks skeptical, even though he claims he was feelin’ it afterward. Travis invites him to the church, and he says he’ll be by. When Travis is gone, he says he’ll be by with some handcuffs. Yep, I’m right.

Lushion visits Pete. He gives Pete a gun, saying that Pete didn’t get it from him. They talk about Joey. He tells Pete to trust him; they’re all going down.

Out of the loop Randal can’t find his mother. Alex comes home and he grabs her. Marcie pops out, and Alex says Randal is just leaving, and so is Marcie. Marcie asks what happened, and Alex tells her to get out. Marcie says she’s not leaving until her man gets there with her car. Alex asks who her man is, and Marcie tells her that it’s Brad. Alex says she’s not in the mood, and Marcie antagonizes her. They tussle, and Brad walks in and separates them, taking Marcie out. Marcie says he’s hers now. Like any guy except Lushion is a prize on this show.

Kelly makes an appointment with her lawyer. Her boss tells her to call her son’s school. He left his science project in the car and Kelly asks if she can drop it off. Her boss says that’s fine, and tells Kelly what a great employee she is.

Not a big shock. Travis is waiting in Kelly’s car.

Next time, Kelly struggles with Travis, Lushion accuses Eddie of killing Andrew, and Louise tells Randal to let it go.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

LisaR questions Dorit as to whether her dinner party guests were crammed in the bathroom doing coke. Dorit is appalled. Lisa says she was sitting at the table by herself, and we flash back to her sitting at a table for maybe eight, empty, except for her and PK talking. I can think of several reasons why they might have left her sitting alone, not one of them involving drugs. Dorit says, yes, her home is a coke den, and Lisa says she alluded to her being a Xanax addict, and all this time she’d kept her thoughts to herself. Lisa says some more stupid stuff, and gets up from the table.

LisaV thinks it’s time to leave, and Eileen agrees this isn’t getting anywhere. On the way home, Dorit gets upset because she has small children at home. LisaV says she’s been there, and we flash back to – OH GOD NO – the Munchhausen conversation. We will never be rid of that. Never.

The next morning, LisaR calls LisaV to say thanks for the trip. She wishes she could stay for the shopping, but she has to get to Chicago. LisaV isn’t too happy about how she attacked Dorit, but invites her to an upcoming get together. LisaR has no regrets. She says she “goes there” with people who aren’t listening or say untruths. Says the person who didn’t remember telling Eden that Kim was not sober and close to death.

Eileen frets about the altercation with Erika, but it’s time for shopping, so she has to set that aside. Dorit says shopping will always take away the pain. They go to rich people stores that sell beautiful stuff. Erika points out that she’s a size six at home, but an extra-large in Hong Kong. Erika’s sunglasses are everything. Rich people wear the best sunglasses.

Eden buys Erika a friendship ring. OMG, ERIKA’S EARRINGS!!! They’re hoops, but they’re unusual and the color is a metallic rose gold.

LisaV takes the ladies to the ASPCA, where they’ve brought some dogs that were rescued from the meat trade. The whole thing is just so sad. But on the happy end, they visit the saved pups. Lisa talks about the cause in her interview. Eileen has a moment with one of the dogs. She asks about adoption, but it’s complicated and lengthy. They go to a room where some of the dogs can wander around and mingle. The dogs play bitey-face with each other. In her interview, Lisa says if you’re a dog lover, you can’t ignore this situation. I agree. She says that this is what the trip was for, and hopes the women understand.

Erika meets Eileen for lunch. She wants to apologize. Eileen explains that The Young and the Restless has been running late, but Erika will be getting a script soon. In her interview, Eileen says it’s awkward, since both of them are pretending nothing happened. Kyle joins them. They talk about the Hong Kong dinner, and Erika doesn’t think Dorit is sincere. She keeps making it seem like Dorit and PK said she flashed him on purpose, but that’s not what happened. She’s hoping for an apology at LisaV’s. Suddenly, she apologizes to Eileen for her meltdown. Eileen is cool about it. Erika says she was exhausted from taking the high road, and for the first time, I can identify with her.

Boy George is starting his tour, and Dorit is glad she’s not the one traveling. She talks to PK about what happened in Hong Kong. She doesn’t know where to go with LisaR. PK says LisaR is schizophrenic and dangerous. Dorit tells him about Erika’s “dramatic hoo-ha,” referring to her dinner dramatics, not Pantygate. He wonders about seeing them at LisaV’s gathering.

Commercial break with important information. Below Deck: Mediterranean begins again on Tuesday, May 2nd. They’ll be traveling to Croatia.

Erika comes to the Y&R studio. Eileen meets her in the dressing room. She’s excited and nervous. Eileen tells her that it used to be her dressing room, and her son practically grew up there.

Kyle works on the show she’s producing. Another producer goes over the upcoming scene with her. She’s liking being on the other side of the camera, and wants to earn her title. Mauricio visits Kyle on the set. In her interview, she talks about their crazy schedule, but they’re navigating it together.

Erika is playing Farrah Dubois, a real estate agent. She and Eileen’s character, Ashley, literally run into each other and have an exchange. They meet later and Farrah tries to talk Ashley into buying a house. Eileen thinks Erika should be on the show again.

Kevin Lee sets up Lisa’s party. She talks about the fist fights arguments in Hong Kong. In her interview, she says that she thought LisaR’s intentions were good at first, but now she’s not so sure. She doesn’t want to backtrack, but feels the need to point out that some of the things LisaR says are not acceptable. Ponies! LisaV introduces Kevin to the pony guy, and Kevin asks if he’s straight. Yes, he is. Oh well. Lisa leaves to get ready while the ponies get their hair done.

The rules are to wear pink, diamonds, and wedges. Kyle has tried to hem her jumpsuit on the fly, and thinks it’s crooked. That sounds like something I would do. Take the scissors to a pair of pants five minutes before I’m wearing them.

Erika’s glam squad is shocked at the wedges rule (frankly, so am I), and Erika says they don’t do wedges. So instead they come up with a pink wig for her to wear.

LisaV tends to the last-minute details. She says Kevin always interprets what she wants, and then some, even though she never understands a word he says. The tent is gorgeous, all pink and flowing, with a dreamlike room underneath it. Lots of crystal and pink happening.

Dorit tells PK she thinks it’s going to be awkward. LisaR tells Eileen that she’s an easy target. Eileen thinks there will be spirited conversation this evening. Is that what we’re calling it now?

Harrison! Everything is even more beautiful all lit up, and everyone is wearing something fabulous. Dorit questions LisaV as to whether she’s ever said that LisaR has a drug problem. LisaV says of course not, and PK seconds that. Dorit finds LisaR unpredictable, and doesn’t know what she’s capable of.

Next time, lots of glitter, some dancing, PK insults Erika, and Dorit tells LisaR to take a step back.

🔫 Imposters is so good! Tonight, Maddie let Tim know that she knows he’s working for the FBI. (There’s a lot of that going around.) But, she propositioned him gave him a proposition. I love this show because it’s full of surprises.

👠 Not so much Little Women: LA. This week, we’re back to the Briana/Matt question. Briana insists she’s moving forward, yet she never seems to. We also find out that after she attended the Dancing with the Stars episode where Terra was eliminated (jinx!), she put the moves on Terra’s manager or publicist or whatever. Christy has had her neck surgery, so nothing new in the infirmary that is her household.

 

Mar28

March 27, 2017 – Julian Won’t Go Away & a Vanderpump Wedding with a Side of Divorce

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

At the MetroCourt, Scotty tells Ava that he’s going to save her ass.

Laura interrupts Sonny and Carly’s argument at Perks, but Carly says they’re done. It doesn’t matter. Laura stopped respecting boundaries ages ago.

Elizabeth shows Jason the timeline of Jake’s life in the drawings. She tells him that she and Franco wanted to see how he perceived himself. Jason thinks it looks normal.

Sam calls Alexis about helping with Scout so she can take a nap. Alexis says she doesn’t know if she can make it today. She says she keeps playing the Julian stuff over in her head. Sam suggests coming over to talk; she doesn’t want Alexis to be alone. Alexis tells her not to worry, and hints that she’s going to a meeting, as she opens a bottle of vodka. Probably Joe’s Vodka. Sam says the other girls told her that Alexis wasn’t doing very well, but she was handling it – one day at a time. There’s a knock at Sam’s door, and Sam tells Alexis to come by after her meeting. Alexis’s meeting is with a drink and Julian’s letter.

Elizabeth shows Jason the scarecrow in the book, and asks if he doesn’t think it’s worth exploring. He says he talked to the psychologist at the school, and Jake is doing fine. Why reopen an old wound? Franco says it’s just below the surface, waiting for the right trigger.

It’s Carly at Sam’s door. She was looking for Jason, but Sam invites her in to talk. Carly thinks her marriage is over.

Laura apologizes to Sonny. She asks if he wants to talk about it, but he says no thanks. He says he spoke to Dante about what happened at the custody hearing, and Diane is usually better than that. Laura says that Valentin outmaneuvered them. Sonny says he offered Dante help, but Dante turned him down. Laura says well, he is a cop, but he’s also proud, and she jokingly wonders where he gets it. Laura says she might take Sonny up on the offer though.

Scotty tells Ava to finish her drink before Lucy shows up. She asks if Lucy agreed to give him the pill bottle, and he says that’s the plan. Ava doesn’t want Sonny to be more suspicious than he already is. Scotty tells Ava that he has a radical plan to blindside Lucy. As he hustles Ava out of the restaurant, Lucy steps out of the elevator.

Franco says that Jason might not want to talk, but they have to. Jake has something he’s hiding. Elizabeth tells Jason to look at the drawings. She explains about the blank space that the scarecrow now resides in, and says that Jake claims he didn’t draw it. Franco says he knows it’s Jake’s drawing, and Jason asks if this was Franco’s idea. Elizabeth tells him about Jake saying that Sam is cursed. Jason wonders what he knows, and Elizabeth says that’s what she’s trying to find out. She thinks what happened to Sam triggered him, but Jason thinks that Franco is behind it.

Sonny tells Laura to name it. Laura tells him about the six months of limited visitation, after which Lulu can pursue custody. Sonny doesn’t think she’ll have a problem, but Laura says that Valentin is a master manipulator, and she needs to find his vulnerabilities. Sonny says he’ll get someone on it. Laura tells him about Nelle being Valentin’s new nanny.

Carly asks if Sam thinks she’s wrong to still feel betrayed. She says she can’t just forget because Sonny wants her to. Sam says no, and hers is the only opinion that counts. She asks what Carly wants. Carly says that she wants Morgan to be alive, and her life the way it used to be. She says her life was shattered, but she doesn’t think Sonny wants to put it back together.

Scotty tells Ava good-by, and she tells him to enjoy his lunch. Scotty sits down with Lucy, and tells her that she and Ava have a lot in common; they’re both protective of their children. Lucy points out that she doesn’t date her daughter’s boyfriends. She accuses Scotty of doing Ava’s dirty work.

Alexis kicks back with the letter and some booze. We hear Julian’s voice saying she’s better off without him and how much he loves her. Julian appears, and says he’d do it all over again. He’d do anything for her.

Lucy says there’s always an agenda with Scotty. He wants her to hear him out. She says Ava has him wrapped around her little finger, and Lucy knows he wants the pills. He says he’s not denying anything, and she’s shocked. He says he doesn’t like the little finger business, but she’s right on the money with everything else.

Alexis reaches for Julian. There’s’ a knock at the door, and he disappears. Alexis stupidly hides the bottle behind a throw pillow. It’s Ava. She says it’s about Julian. She asks if Alexis knows that Jordan called off the search, and Alexis says it feels like he’s still there. Ava says for her too; he comes to her in her dreams and she can’t accept he’s gone. She says they haven’t found his body because it’s not there to find. She wants to pool their resources to try and find him, and in the meantime, she finds the bottle. Worst. Hiding. Place. Ever.

Sonny is surprised that Valentin hired Nelle. He didn’t think she’d stay in Port Charles. Laura says they don’t know Nelle like he and Carly do. He says Nelle is bad news, and Laura shouldn’t have anything to do with her.

Carly tells Sam that it takes a lot for Sonny to apologize, and he expects it to be accepted because he’s arrogant as hell. Sam says none of the other women Sonny has ever been with are the answer. She’s right; he’s arrogant and Sam doesn’t get it. She says women see the dimples, but underneath, he’s complicated, even scary. She doesn’t think there’s another woman strong enough for him. Carly asks what if she’s not strong enough anymore?

Jason says Franco is using their son to play Elizabeth. Elizabeth is like, thanks a lot for thinking I’m an idiot, and tells him that her eyes are open. She realizes that he has reasons to mistrust Franco. Jason says he despises Franco. He tortured Sam, and Jason doesn’t care about the tumor that was removed; he is who he is. Elizabeth tells him that he’s ignoring medical fact, and Franco is there because she trusts him. Jason says the boys will pay the price, but Elizabeth says Franco has no reason to hurt them. Jason says that Franco wants to play the hero. Franco says that Jake has a problem that needs to be confronted, but Jason says not by Franco. Elizabeth says Franco is a part of their lives and household, and get used to it; he’s not going anywhere. Jason says maybe Jake should then. If Franco is going to be spending so much time there, maybe Jake shouldn’t.

Elizabeth asks if Jason is going to try to take her son if she doesn’t fall in line. He says if she chooses to have a relationship with Franco, that’s her business, but Jake was doing fine until Franco came along. If he’s the cause of Jake’s problems, Jason is going to handle it.

Scotty tells Lucy that it’s time to give the pills back. Lucy asks why she should, and he tells her think of the children. Lucy says she was trying to shield Kiki, but maybe she should know the truth. She says that Kiki and Ava have a relationship based on deception. Scotty asks if Serena would see it that way. She doesn’t like drama, and that’s probably why she hasn’t visited. She asks if he’s threatening to tell on her, and he says if she doesn’t like the prospect, maybe she should reconsider.

Ava says she’ll take Alexis to a meeting, and Alexis tells her to mind her own business. Ava says that Julian tried to help her, and this is how she repays him, with a bottle of vodka. Alexis tells Ava to deal with Julian’s death in her own way and so will she.

Sonny says Nelle’s interest always come first – to hurt Carly and her family. Laura asks if that includes Michael. She saw them talking, and when she asked Michael about Nelle, he said they used to be friends. She had the feeling something was left unfinished. Sonny says Michael gives Nelle more compassion than she deserves, but his family always comes first. Nelle used Morgan’s death to get at them, and Michael will never forgive her for that.

Carly tells Sam that she and Sonny always come back to each other, but maybe they can’t find their way this time. She says that Bobbie thinks she and Sonny have reached tipping point. She likes Sonny, just not with Carly. Sam can’t blame her. Carly wishes things would go back to the way they used to be. but it feels wrong.  As many times as they say they’ll never do it again, they do. Sam says it’s the marriage they have, but it doesn’t have to be the marriage she’s stuck with. A marriage is done when you’re done growing. Carly says maybe they’ve reached that point. Sam tells her that she’s admired them for years because their love is so strong. Carly needs to ask herself if she’s sure that they don’t have it in them to grow some more.

Elizabeth wonders why Jason thinks Franco is the problem. Franco tells her to look at the bright side; they didn’t get in a fist fight, and that represents progress. Elizabeth says it was disastrous, and thinks that Jason is on the verge of threatening war. Franco says that Jason loves Jake more than he hates Franco. He knows something is wrong. He’s never going to be their cheerleader, but so what? Elizabeth says for Jake’s sake, she needs him on board.

Scotty says that Sonny and Carly should go on with their lives. Lucy doesn’t believe he’s being moved by compassion. He says he knows her, and she always does the right thing so Serena will be proud of her. Lucy thinks there’s more than meets the eye. She says she’s a stand-up friend, and one friend who’s never hurt her is Sonny. She grabs a piece of bread, says “Ta!” and leaves.

Laura appreciates Sonny being candid and will take it to heart. She’ll do whatever it takes to protect her family. Sonny suggests a backup plan, since Nelle is a disaster waiting to happen. Laura says he’s still standing. Sonny says he doesn’t know if he has it in him to try again with Carly He loves her, but it’s like what they had isn’t there anymore. Laura tells him to dig deeper to find it, and make sure there’s nothing left before walking away.

Ava says she’s not going to let Alexis use Julian to start boozing it up again. Alexis says what she does with her life is none of Ava’s business. Ava asks her what life? and Alexis tells her to get out. Ava says she’s glad Julian’s not there to see what happened with his sacrifice; she’s not longer worth saving. Alexis guzzles some vodka, and Ava walks out.

Laura makes a phone call. She says that she thinks she knows how Nelle might prove useful.

Carly walks into Sonny’s house. He says he doesn’t like the way they left things, and she says she didn’t either. Sonny’s phone rings. It’s a real landline with a curly phone cord. He says he didn’t want to be interrupted, and then says send her up. I guess it’s literally the house phone.

Jason goes back home, and Sam tells him that he just missed Carly. Sam is worried about her. Jason says he was dropping Jake’s glove off. Something is wrong with Jake, and he doesn’t know what to do.

Franco tells Elizabeth that Jason will have to deal with Jake’s problem, whether he likes it or not. She’s afraid he’ll demand a new custody arrangement. She feels like she has to play along, and Franco asks what that means. Is she breaking up with him? She says no, but maybe they should hold off on him moving in for the time being. Franco says she’s gotta do what she’s gotta do, and she says that sorting things out with Jake is important. This isn’t what she wants, and Franco says, but it’s for the best. He tells her that if they’re doing this, they’d better get started, and leaves.

Alexis is passed out. Someone jiggles the door knob. She stumbles around and opens the door, thinking it’s Julian, but there’s no one there.

Ava comes back to the MetroCourt and sees Scotty sitting by himself. He says their business concluded early, and Lucy left, probably hungry. Ava asks if he got the pills, and he tells her to save the applause. There’s a problem.

Lucy is at Sonny’s door. He says that Max told him it’s something important. Lucy says she’s waited long enough and can’t wait another minute. She has the pill bottle in her hand.

Tomorrow, Tracy asks Ava for help, Valentin says he’s ready to make good on his promise to Alexis, and  Laura tells Lulu that Nelle could be the answer.

Vanderpump Rules

It’s wedding time! Harrison! Dog whose name I don’t know! Lisa takes her place at the podium, and the attendants begin to walk down the aisle. Butter and Gordo! Where’s Giggy? Omg, I love Katie’s vintage brooch bouquet so much. I’m coming very close to buying one for myself. They’re not as expensive as you might think on Etsy. In his interview, Tom says he knew Katie would look good, but didn’t know she’d look this good.

Lisa starts by saying she’s been married over thirty years, so she has some advice – run. She gives the couple a list of do’s and don’ts, including not texting while on tequila. Schwartz says his vows, at first pretending that he forgot them. He says he was resigned to being LA’s most ineligible bachelor until Katie came along. In her interview, Kristen talks about how obsessed he was with Katie. Schwartz says he can’t imagine not waking up next to her in the morning. He talks about having to tear the relationship down to rebuild it, and says he’s never loved her more. He gets all teary, and no surprise, Tom does too, wiping his eyes on poor Butter’s head. Or maybe it’s Gordo.

Katie talks about the love, laughter, and tears, and how they persevered. She can’t wait to spend her life with Schwartz. Jax insists he’s not crying, but he is. The rings are exchanged, and we flash back to the ring on a string. In her interview, Katie says this is the real deal – her happy ending. Lisa asks if they take each other for richer or richer. (Not a typo.) They say their “I do’s,” and Lisa pronounces them husband and wife. Katie says they’re married AF.

The reception begins. In her interview, Lisa says this group has a way of working things out that makes no sense to her, but makes sense to them. The Schwartzes arrive. In her interview, Stassi says everyone thought that she and Jax were the glue that held the group together, but it’s really Katie and Schwartz; she and Jax were just the glue everybody sniffed. Ha-ha! She cracks me up. Carter tells Kristen that he likes when she’s drunk and has wedding fever. In her interview, Kristen asks who doesn’t think about getting married when they’re at someone else’s wedding. That would be me. Dinner is served, and Stassi makes Lisa a plate, since she’s used to serving her. Giggy!

Lisa asks Tom about marrying Ariana. He wants to, but says he’s never made an attempt at proposing. Lisa says she was like Ariana when she was younger, not wanting to get married or have kids, but things change, and it was the best thing that she ever did. She talks to Tom about partnering up for a new restaurant. In his interview, Tom’s head explodes over Lisa thinking of him as a potential business partner.

Schwartz’s brother Billy takes the mic. Nothing to see here. Brother Bert thanks Jax and Tom for getting them to the wedding. Billy takes the mic again. Still nothing to see here. Tom talks about Schwartz rubbing him the wrong way – said no one ever. He goes on about how wonderful Schwartz is. Stassi talks about them taking care of her a million times, and reminds me of a couple I was friends with in my single days, who talked me down many a time. In her interview, Katie says the wedding wouldn’t have felt complete without Stassi.

Time to drink and dance. Jax and Brittany step away from the crowd. Jax says he doesn’t think things are going well for them anymore. Because he’s the biggest idiot on the planet. Next to Lulu on GH. He says he loves her as a person, and then tells her that he’s kidding, . Because he’s still the biggest idiot on the planet. In her interview, Brittany says he was thisclose to having his weenie fed to the chickens. He says a wedding is going to happen; he just doesn’t know when. In his interview, he says she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and when the times comes, she’ll be the one. He wants her to know there’s light at the end of the tunnel, but IMO that’s debatable.

Lisa asks Katie when she’s having children. Good Lord, give her a minute. Scheana suggests that Ariana have a reception without actually getting married. At the bar, various guests toast to Katie and Schwartz. Tom tells Ariana about Lisa’s proposition. He says he’s been a bartender for ten years, and has always wanted to open his own place. He points out how happy and supportive Ken and Lisa are as a couple, and says he looks at Ariana the same way. In his interview, he says he’d love to be a dad someday. He tells Ariana not to worry, he’s not going to propose, but wonders if someday they’ll get married. In her interview, she says she loves him, but doesn’t know if marriage is something she wants. She’s not going to shoot him down yet though.

The cake is cut. Schwartz puts icing on Katie’s nose. Thank God they didn’t do that smushing the cake in each other’s faces thing. I hate that, and once saw a bride run to the bathroom in tears after the jackass she married did that to her. Although overall, it was the worst wedding I ever attended. Her father officiated, and forgot what state the wedding was in during his speech. That wouldn’t have been so bad, but looking back, I was sure it was a sign. The room was adjacent to a bar where there was a football game on TV, so every time the people at the bar made noise, we heard it. Because there was no music to drown it out. And it was a cash bar. Not even one “free” drink. And the wine was served in what I would call a juice glass, aka tiny. It was also the day after Christmas. I’ll stop now, since I’m getting the shakes just thinking about it. Scheana has barely seen Shay since the ceremony, and wonders what’s up. Lisa talks to Tom about Schwartz being “the face” of the new bar. She says he’d do a great job as a front man, and Tom could deal with what she does. She thinks they should call it Tom Tom, but doesn’t know if that will be a good idea when she’s sober. Schwartz joins them, and Lisa tells him about the new property, and how she and Ken want Tom to be involved, as well as for him to be the face.

Commercial break with important information. Southern Charm starts again next Monday, April 3.

Schwartz asks if Lisa is serious. He’s concerned that if it fails, it will be on them. In his interview, Tom says one whiff of responsibility and Schwartz runs. Lisa says almost the same thing, that he’s allergic to commitment. Since he already made a big one today, she says she’ll talk to him on Monday. Tom asks if Schwartz is busy in three months, and if not, why not open up a new bar with Lisa Vanderpump? Schwartz says he realizes that he’s over-thinking it, and Tom agrees.

Stassi asks if Ariana still thinks she’s annoying. In her interview, Stassi says she likes Ariana (why, I’m not sure), and it hurts her feelings when Ariana is mean to her. She asks Ariana if she’s closing herself off. In her interview, Ariana says she doesn’t have to be friends with Stassi. She tells Stassi that she’s doing the best that she can. She suddenly starts crying, saying she’s trying not to be a 30 year old bartender who’s doing nothing. Stassi says that’s not who she is, and that she shouldn’t feel sad about feeling sad. It’s okay to have emotions. Stassi tells her that nobody is great all the time, and you’re not a human being if you’re not sad sometimes. They manage to connect somewhat, and in her interview, Ariana has to admit that Stassi isn’t a monster.

More dancing! And Tom has another surprise. He’s brought his trumpet. Oh, yay, drunk trumpet playing. The sax player asks Tom not to play in his ear. Everyone is all happy and buzzed, and Shay finally shows up. Schwartz says that Jax and Tom are like family. He’d take a bullet for them. Maybe in the leg. Stassi wonders what it’s like to have someone love you that much. Katie says it’s amazing, and there’s someone out there for her. The Three Stooges Jax, Tom, and Schwartz talk about what great friends they are. Geez, without Kristen putting the boxing gloves on, weddings are pretty boring in La La Land. Kristen does announce that she’s not ovulating though.

Giggy and Harrison! Lisa signs the marriage certificate. Schwartz says it’s official now, and Lisa tells them, off you go. Katie says they’re very committed, and it would be way too easy to make a joke here. Lisa says thank God it’s over, and Ken gives her props for her officiating.

Three months later. Scheana gets together with Lisa at Villa Rosa. Scheana tells her that she’s found out some things about Shay recently. He goes MIA and doesn’t answer her calls. She says he hasn’t been at the apartment once in two weeks. Everything is not rainbows and sunshine like she’s been telling people. He’s with his parents, and Lisa says it’s been bullsh*t since she found out about Shay taking pills. In her interview, Lisa says she thinks Scheana knew in her gut that there was a problem, but didn’t want to admit it. Scheana tells Lisa that Shay has been taking Adderall for months. One of her friends had pulled her aside and let her know he’d been scoring pills, but saying he was just the middleman. She started checking his emails, and discovered that the bank account had been cleaned out. She says she can’t picture her life without him, but can’t picture it moving forward. Lisa asks if they connect at all, even in bed, and Scheana shakes her head. Lisa tells her that she’s young enough to start again. Scheana says they were talking about starting a family, but Lisa says you can’t start a family with someone who isn’t there. Scheana is going to meet with a lawyer because she’s done. She wants Shay to be able to look her in the eye and say he’s not doing drugs.

Scheana waits for Shay at the apartment. He asks what’s up, and she notices he’s gotten his ears pierced. She wants to know why he didn’t come home. He says that he wanted to figure some things out, not involving anyone else. He says he loves her, but she doesn’t listen, and now he got her attention. He wants to be happy, but can’t do it without her. She says the relationship isn’t good, and he says he’s been labeled a druggie, and no one treats him with respect. She asks if he’s on drugs, and he tells her no. He complains that she doesn’t treat him with respect either. She tells him that she talked to Lisa, and he says he has his own mother, and that Lisa should talk to her own kids. He says Scheana isn’t taking care of him the way she should, but she says he’s never home. He talks about the studio, and how productive things are there, and she wonders how they’re up all night without drugs. She asks about the bank account, and he insists he’s just buying music stuff. In her interview, she says she may never know the truth, but this isn’t the man she married. She tells him this really needs to be done, and she’s meeting with a lawyer. She says divorce isn’t easy, and wasn’t what she wanted. They both start crying, and she says he knows she’s right. He nods, and she tells him to get his stuff. In her interview, she says she’d planned on spending the rest of her life with him, growing old and having kids with him, and all she knows is that they’re done. Shay packs. The door closes behind him. This is really kind of sad.

Next time, the reunion, and the return of Lala. Godzilla with a cat eye.

🎉 And at another wedding on New Year’s Eve, 2010…

Giggy&amp;GrandmaWrinkles