Monthly Archives: May 2023

May 5, 2023 – Lots Of Action In Greenland, Behind It, Her Why, Happy Anniversary, Almost, Snub Drama, It’s Her, Closing, VanderKarma, Baby Off Deck, Accused, Brave Pets (!), 10 Quotes To Ponder & Listen

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Sonny says, they heard about Willow; how’s she doing? Carly says, Michael’s with her now, and Nina asks, what happened? Carly says, she collapsed. They’re waiting to hear from Dr. Randolph, but they talked to TJ, and her condition has deteriorated. Nina asks, how bad? and Carly says, hopefully, they can find Nina’s Aunt Liesl, and Drew can bring her back here in time to have the bone marrow transplant. But in the meantime, Willow has to stay in the hospital.

Michael thanks Willow for agreeing to stay, and she says, the whole, if you go home you might not make it argument was pretty persuasive. Michael says he guesses he pulled out all the stops, and Willow says, he made her see she needs a controlled environment for now, so she can go home to him and their kids later. She’s fighting with everything she has to stay with their family.

Somewhere in Greenland. Trina asks if Jordan can hear her, and Jordan says she can. Where is Trina? Trina says, on the Haunted Star with Spencer and Ace, and Jordan says, they have to get off that boat now. Trina says, they know, but… Jordan says, no buts. There are drones on the way with orders to drop bombs on the entire island. They have no way to stop them. Take the baby and get to the seaplane before it’s too late. Spencer says, he can’t leave his grandmother behind, and Trina says, or Curtis. She asks Jordan, what about the others? and Jordan says, every second counts. Take the baby, and get off that island. Spencer tells Trina to take Ace and get to the seaplane; he’ll look for the others. She says, what if he runs into Victor, or his guards? She’s not leaving him. Felicia takes the phone, and tells Spencer, they both know his grandmother would want him and Ace to be safe. Jordan says, exactly. Their job is to get themselves and the baby to that plane before it takes off.

Holly tells Victor to drop his gun, but he asks why he would do that. Especially if she’s going to drop her gun and let him pass. Holly asks why she would do that? Obviously, he’d shoot her if she did. Obrecht says, stop talking, and shoot him, and Victor puts Obrecht in front of him, saying, be careful or she might shoot Liesl. Obrecht tells her not to worry about that, and shoot him, but Victor says, what about poor Willow? She’ll die. Obrecht says she’ll instruct Holly how to harvest her marrow. Now pull the trigger! Victor holds up the cannister, and says, if anything happens to him, they all die. This makes no sense, since if he’s dead, he can’t release it, never mind the sunlight part, but we’ll let that pass.

Anna looks at Valentin through the window of the isolation room, and calls to him. He says, she’s not real; she’s an illusion. She’s just like Helena; he’s imagining her. She says, no, she’s here. She’s absolutely real. He has to hang on.

Alone in her office, Portia says, God, if You can hear me, please keep Trina and Curtis safe. Just bring my family home. There’s a knock at the door, and she says, come in. Elizabeth says she hopes she’s not interrupting. She just wanted to check on Portia. Portia says, Marshall was here with her earlier, but she sent him home because he needs his rest. Elizabeth says, he’s not the only one, and Portia says she knows. She’s so tired, but she can’t stop thinking, what if she never sees Trina and Curtis again?

Laura tells Curtis, wait a minute. The display on this computer… The program it’s running; she’s seen that before. He asks, where? and we see a map on the screen with a spot that says, Target Area. She says, forty years ago, in another underground bunker, also owned by Mikkos Cassadine. She sits, and says, look at this. He says, it’s a map of the mid-Atlantic states, and she says, it’s all the same. He says, same as what? and she says she thinks there might be another weather machine.

Trina says, they hear what Jordan is saying, but the others have to be warned. Robert says, he promises they’ll tell everyone in the bunker about the drone strike, and Felicia says, they have to get to the seaplane now. Otherwise, they’re putting themselves and Ace in grave danger. Spencer says, they’re right, and Trina tells Jordan, please tell her mom and dad she loves them. Jordan says she will, but they can tell them themselves when they get home. Now get herself to the plane. Good luck, and stay safe. Spencer says, they have to hurry. They can do this. Trina says, together.

Portia says, it’s one thing for Trina not to speak to her. She guesses Trina is angry; she should be. She’ll take the silence, but for Trina to listen to Spencer, someone who’s been known to hurt every single person who’s cared about him… Elizabeth says, Spencer can be difficult, and Portia says, all she was trying to do was give Trina some time and space to process everything that had happened, and now the window she might have had to make things right is gone forever? Elizabeth says, no, and Portia says she doesn’t know why she waited. Why didn’t she just go to Trina, and do everything in her power to make things right when she had the chance? Elizabeth says, Trina is as big-hearted as she is stubborn. When she comes back, they’ll be able to work things out. There’s another knock at the door, and Portia says, come in. Jordan walks in, and Portia asks if there’s any word. Jordan says, they just heard from Trina and Spencer.

Anna calls to Valentin, and tells him to focus. Look at her. He says, the real Anna’s in the hospital. His father shot her. She told him to come and get Victor. Anna says she knows she told him that, but she came after him. He looks at her, and says he wishes she were really here, so he could hold her against him one last time; tell her how much he loves her. He cries, and she says she loves him too. Listen. She loves him. That’s why she’s here. To help him. She’s going to get him out of there. He says, no, she can’t.

Robert calls to Agent Hursley (I’ve been spelling it wrong), and Hursley says, it’s brave of Robert to speak to him without a lawyer present. Robert says, unless Hursley is here to tell him that the Bureau now realizes how stupid it is to bomb an island with ten people on it, get out of his face. Hursley says, but he’s on orders to stay and monitor the situation, and Robert says, do it where he can’t see him. Hursley says, let’s keep each other posted, shall we? and walks off. Robert tells Felicia that he’s going to talk to this director himself, and see if he can get through to him, and leaves.

Curtis tells Laura that he’s heard stories that the Cassadines had a machine that could control the climate. He thought it was just an urban legend. Laura says, no, it wasn’t. It was absolutely real. It was based on something called carbonic snow. The weather machine was capable of creating an artificial blizzard in a targeted area, and in the summer of 1981, Mikkos Cassadine aimed that thing right at the city of Port Charles. A group of them – Luke, Robert, Tiffany Hill, and Laura – managed to stop him. That weather machine was destroyed, but this is the same program. He says, the computer’s from the same era. If it’s the same program, is it hooked up to another weather machine?

Sasha arrives at the hospital, and goes over to Sonny and Nina. She says, Brook told her that Willow was here, and Sonny hugs her. She turns to Nina, and Nina says she’s so scared. They hug, and Josslyn and Carly see them while walking down the hall. Josslyn says, Michael is not going to like that Sonny and Nina are here, and Carly says she hopes they have sense enough to keep their distance. Nina thanks Sasha, who asks, how is Willow? Nina says, the updates are not good. Her condition is deteriorating. Sasha says she knows this must be agony for Nina; for everyone. Is there any word on Liesl? Nina shakes her head.

Holly tells Victor, give up. Back-up is on the way; there’s nowhere to run. He says, come on. That old trick. She disappoints him. Holly says, it’s not a trick, and he says she’s wasting her time here. Just let him go, and she can get on with looking for her son Ethan. Apparently, he didn’t get the memo, and she says, Ethan’s perfectly fine, thank you. She found out about the auction – sick little affair that it was – and Ethan is now safe and far from his reach. He failed – again. He says, it doesn’t matter. Once he releases this pathogen, it has an 80% mortality rate, and he’s the only one with the antidote. Holly says, at this point, why bother? and he says, why bother try to save the world? Why bother living? She asks, what’s to live for? For him? Bearing in mind his unfortunate condition. He asks what she means by that, and she says she would have thought by now he’d have figured out that it was her who arranged for the little addition to his cocktail. Obrecht says, she’s not too good at it. He’s still alive and kicking. Holly says, alive, yes. Kicking? Not so much. She’s glad they’re finally face to face, because she really wanted him to know it was her. Obrecht says, she doesn’t mean… and Holly says, no more heirs for Uncle Victor. In fact, he can’t even try, can he? Victor says, you bitch! and aims his gun at her, but Drew pops out of nowhere, grabs Victor’s arm, and karate chops his neck. Victor falls face down in the snow.

Carly goes into Willow’s room, and says she doesn’t want to interrupt. Michael asks, what’s up? and she says, Sonny and Nina are here. Michael asks if she can tell them… but Willow says, wait.

Drew checks Victor’s pulse, when Holly calls to him. Obrecht also lies in the snow, and Drew says, no, no, no! Holly asks if Obrecht can hear her, and when she takes her hand away from Obrecht’s head, there’s blood on it.

Valentin says, Anna can’t open that door; he’s infected. She says she knows. They’re here to help him. He asks, where’s Victor and Obrecht? They have the cure. She says she doesn’t know; the others are looking for them. He says, the others? Oh God. She tells him not to worry about them. She’s going to try and find him a hazmat suit or something that they can put on him, and get him to safety. She’ll be right back. He says, no, don’t go, but she says, there’s no use arguing. They don’t have time. He says, it’s already too late.

Curtis says, they could be looking at an electronic ghost. An old program that started up when the computer booted up. As long as it’s not connected to an actual weather machine, it’s harmless. She says, except Mikkos Cassadine was never harmless; he was relentless. He was obsessed and absolutely thorough, and he knew there were agencies, including the WSB tracking him, trying to stop him. Curtis says, seems like a guy like that would have back-up, and she says she thinks he’s right. He says, that would explain this, indicating all the machinery. He says, why would someone like Mikkos Cassadine equip a bunker in literally the middle of nowhere without telling his brother? So he could retreat if he needed to with two weapons; two ways to hold the world hostage. The pathogen and the weather machine. This is real and it’s running. They have to stop it. He’ll find a way to cut the power. He starts looking around, but she says, don’t do that. They can kill the power to this computer, but that doesn’t mean they’ve killed the power to the weather machine. He says, she’s right. If they interrupt the power, the computer might shut down, lock them out entirely, and they’ll never find them. She says, it’s calibrated its target… the same as last time. He says, Port Charles.

Jordan tells Portia, Trina and Spencer agreed to head straight to the plane. With any luck, they should be home before daybreak. She moves toward the door, but turns, and says, Trina said to tell Portia that she loves her. Portia thanks Jordan, and Elizabeth looks outside. She says, is that snow? Man, I’ll bet longtime watchers are going out of their minds. Portia says, oh my goodness, and they all look out the window.

Sonny asks if they can just go, but Nina wants to stay a while longer. Just in case. Michael comes by, and Sonny asks how he’s doing. Michael says he’s okay, all things considered. He says, Nina… and she says she’s not here to cause trouble. He says, no. Willow wants to see her.

Drew says, come on, Liesl. Please. Holly says, she’s got a pulse, and asks if Obrecht can hear her. Drew asks, how bad is it? and we see Victor’s hand move.

Curtis says, there must be a way to stop the process, and Laura says, it’s already begun. (Where is Spinelli when you need him?) It will only get worse as it slowly works its way up to full power. The longer the machine is in operation, the greater the devastation will be. Curtis says, they have to try something. He has an idea. He pulls the keyboard over, and types. He says, suspend operations, and hits enter. He reads, to terminate functions, enter chemical formula and operation. Chemical formula for what? She says, carbonic snow. She told him, that’s how the machine works. It creates a blizzard by using carbonic snow. He says, who has the formula for carbonic snow? and Laura says she does.

Trina follows Spencer, who’s carrying Ace, and she asks if he’s sure this is the right way. He says, they’re heading east. She says she didn’t take him for a Boy Scout, and he says he learned it in prep school. They hear something, and he says, someone’s coming. She says, maybe it’s Curtis, but he says, maybe it’s not. They duck down behind a rock with this amazingly good baby, and Victor stumbles past, carrying the cannister. He says, Uncle Victor still has the pathogen, and Trina wonders where Curtis is. He says he doesn’t know, but he has to go after Victor. She says, he can’t.

Felicia says, any luck? and Robert says, yeah, all bad. Hursley was right about one thing; this new director is definitely not going to take any of his calls. Anybody he managed to get through to pretty much said the same thing. She says, they have to follow protocol in the even of a bioterror threat; she got the same drill. He says, they’re dealing with ten people here, as far as the Bureau’s concerned, and not billions. She says, even if those ten people are their friends, and he says, speaking of which, he was hoping to have heard from Anna by now. Felicia says, well, she’s a little busy.

Valentin asks Anna to please tell Charlotte how sorry he is, and that he loves her. And she was always the best thing in his life. Anna says, she still is, and he says he should have known better. When he looked into Alex’s eyes, he should have known she wasn’t Anna, because there’s no kindness there. Anna has compassion in her eyes. Even all those years ago when she rejected his affection, she still knew his heart, and she still had compassion in her eyes. He wishes he could have held onto that. Then Alex couldn’t have poisoned what they had. But she did, and he let her, and he wishes he hadn’t let anger and spite control him. Because then they might have found each other sooner, and he could have been the man he is with her. He likes the man he is with her, so if this is how he dies… Anna says, no, this is not how he dies, but he says, it’s okay, because she redeemed him. Thank you. I love you, Anna Devane. I’ll always love you. He chokes, and she calls his name.

Carly tells Willow that she’ll check on Wiley and Amelia, and make sure Tracy and Brook aren’t teaching them any bad habits. Nina walks in, and says, Michael told her that Willow wanted to see her. Willow says she did, and thanks Carly for everything. Carly says, remember, she needs to rest; no excitement. She leaves, and Nina asks how Willow is feeling. Willow says, the fluids are helping, and Nina says, that’s good. Willow says she wants Nina to do something for her, and Nina says, name it. Willow says, leave Carly alone.

Holly tells Drew, it’s not a bullet wound; she must have hit her head when she fell. Drew says he needs Obrecht to open her eyes, and she moans. He tells her to take it easy, and he and Holly start to help her up. She says, where’s that vile insect? and Drew says, wait. He’s gone. He’s gone, and so is the cannister. He might be headed back to the Haunted Star. Holly says, she’ll go. Get Liesl to the plane. Obrecht says, nein. Valentin is dying. He needs the antidote.

Victor walks into the main salon, and asks, what happened? Where’s Spencer? Goon32 says, some guy showed up out of nowhere. They did their best to fight him off. He took out Ivan, the only guy with a name and knocked him out. Victor says, what about Sir Ace? I make a mental note to name my next pet Sir Ace, and Goon32 says he checked the stateroom; both he and the nanny are gone. Victor says, the hell with the nanny. Find his nephews… Wait. Get the ship underway first. They’re leaving, with or without his family. He puts down the cannister and rubs his head.

Trina says, Spencer can’t go after Victor. They agreed to get Ace to the plane. That’s the plan. Now let’s go before one of Victor’s men sees us. He says, you go. He’s not going to let his Uncle Victor escape. Not when he has a pathogen that he intends to release and kill half the planet. Take his brother and go. He’ll be right behind her. He hands her the baby, and she asks if he promises. He says he does, kisses her, and jets.

Jordan says, snow in May, and Elizabeth says, it happens. The last time was three years ago – Aiden even did a report on it – but this is especially bizarre because it was in the 70s this afternoon. Portia tells her, what she said about Aiden’s report makes her think about Trina. All the reports and homework they helped the kids with over the years… until Trina said she was old enough and could do it by herself. They’re both mothers, so she knows they understand, but even though Trina’s in college, she’s always going to be Portia’s little baby girl. When she looks at Trina, she sees this little trace of a grin that she had when she was in her terrible twos. They laugh, and Portia says, sometimes she thinks Trina never grew out of them. But that smile. No matter how old Trina gets, that’s what she’s going to see. They watch the snow fall.

Laura says, right after they stopped Mikkos, she found the formula in the stateroom, and she studied it as she was falling asleep (as we all would). When she woke up, she realized no one should ever have access to that information, so they burned the paper, but the formula is seared into her memory. Robert was always afraid about that. He was afraid if someone found out, that they might come after her for it. She flashes back to when we were all children, and a very young Robert says, it’s not the kind of information she should have rattling around in her head. It could be dangerous. Laura tells Curtis, but this might be the very thing that saves everyone.

Anna stands in front of Valentin and says his name. She touches his face, and he asks what she’s doing. She can’t be in here. She says she knows, and he asks why she’d do that. She says, because she loves him. He says he’s contagious (something not even hinted at before); he’s infected. She caresses his face.

Laura types, and Curtis says, that was over forty years ago. How sure is she that she memorized that formula exactly? If she gets it wrong, the whole system could lock them out. They’ve got one shot at this. She says she knows. Does he trust her? He says, absolutely. She hits enter, and some beeping happens. She says, it worked! and they hug.

Victor slugs back a drink, and says, Valentin’s not his son after what he did to him. But Victor supposes he’ll just have to take his chances with the rest of humanity. He finishes the drink, and says, right. Let’s get this pathogen somewhere safe and the antidote somewhere safe. He opens the cannister, looks inside, and says, no!

Drew helps Obrecht stand upright, and tells her, take it easy. She says she stole the antidote when Victor wasn’t looking. I’m not sure how, since he had a death grip on that cannister, but she’s pretty resourceful. She says, if he releases the pathogen, there’s an 80% chance he’ll be killing himself as well. Drew asks if that wouldn’t stop him, and she says, Victor is both an idealist and an extremist. The Cassadines are willing to go down with the ship, so to speak.

Curtis leads Laura through the ship, gun drawn. Holly pops out, and Laura stops him from shooting her. She says, it’s Holly. What’s she doing here? What’s going on? Holly hands Laura a phone and says, she needs to call Robert and Jordan. Tell them Victor’s getting away. He’s got the pathogen with him. Last she saw, he was heading toward the Haunted Star. Where’s Valentin?

Valentin asks what Anna has done, but she says she doesn’t know. She thought she could find some kind of suit or protection. She just didn’t want him to be alone. He says he doesn’t know if dying together is all it’s cracked up to be, and she laughs. She tells him to look at her. She wants to tell him about someone; Valentin Cassadine. He’s a man who’s not going to die in some obscene plot of his father’s, because he – you – have a destiny. He’s going to be an even greater father to Charlotte. He’s going to be her partner. Because he knows her darkness. He knows what she’s capable of, and he’s capable of those things too. She knows it sounds a little twisted, but it’s not really, because she thinks that kind of connection elevates them in a way. It allows them to love the people they love, without any kind of restraint or restriction. She cries, and says, including each other. She thinks that’s why she came into this room. He says, but she’ll die, and she says, not necessarily. There’s a 20% chance she’s immune to this thing. She can beat those odds, and she’s willing to risk them just to be with him.

Sonny and Sasha stare at Willow’s closed door, and Sasha says she’s sure everything is fine. He says, really? and she says, no, but they haven’t heard any yelling yet, and Nina hasn’t bolted out of the room in tears. Sonny says he appreciates her optimism, but when his dad was at Turning Woods, he hated to wait. They’d pace back and forth and wait. They’d hold his hand, and wait. He just felt hopeless. She says, even though he didn’t know Sonny was there, she thinks Sonny just being there helped Mike. Sonny says he hopes so.

Josslyn doesn’t see what Willow could possibly have to say to Nina, and Michael says, maybe it was a mistake letting Nina in there. Carly says, he did what his wife wanted him to, and he says, his wife. He and Willow are married. He just wishes the day hadn’t been so hard on her. Carly says, next time, she promises to wait until after the reception to be called in for questioning, and he says, what next time? She says, birthdays, anniversaries, vow renewal. He has a lifetime of celebrations ahead; she knows it. As for his wedding day? Willow doesn’t regret a second of it. He says, even now?

Nina says, Willow wants what? and Willow says she wants Nina and Carly to make peace. Nina says she can try, and Willow says she knows Nina and Carly will never be friends, or even friendly, but promise she’ll at least keep her distance? Stop keeping score of who wronged who when, and just let it all go. Nina doesn’t say anything, and Willow says, wow. Nina hasn’t changed at all when she claims to care about her? Nina says, no, she cares about Willow a great deal… Willow says, then promise her. Whether she survives this or not, Nina will drop her vendetta against Carly.

Jordan comes out with Portia, and asks Robert if there’s any word. He says, not yet, when Jordan’s phone rings. Curtis says, it’s him; he’s got her on speakerphone. Jordan says she’s putting him on speaker, and Portia asks if Trina is with him. He says, not at the moment, but he’s seen her. She’s okay. Jordan says, he’s got to get out of there. The WSB has ordered a drone strike on the island. Curtis and Laura both say, what?! and Jordan says, they can’t risk the pathogen getting released on the world. The drones are already on their way. Curtis says, but the pathogen isn’t here, and Robert asks, where is it? Laura says, they ran into Holly, and she said he was trying to escape on the Haunted Star, and he took the pathogen with him. Bombing the island is not going to do any good. They’ve got to stop the airstrike. Robert yells over to Hursley, and says, tell his boss to call off this airstrike. Hursley says, for the millionth time… and Robert says, change in circumstances. Victor’s left the island, and he’s taken the pathogen with him. All they’re doing now is killing innocent people, and helping Victor escape.

Nina tells Willow, okay. She won’t get into it with Carly anymore. Michael walks in, and Willow thanks Nina. Michael says, Willow needs her rest, and Nina tells Willow, she’s not perfect. She makes mistakes all the time. She’s going to try to be a better person. If there’s anything else Willow needs, just ask. Willow says, keep her promise.

Robert hassles Hursley while he’s on the phone, telling him to hurry up. Jordan tells Curtis and Laura that the drones are on their way. They don’t know exactly when the strike will happen, but it could be any time. They need to get out of there. Robert joins them, and says, Laura, you’re okay. The Bureau listened this time. The strike’s been called off. Everyone looks relieved, and Laura says, what about Victor?

Victor locks the cannister again, and says, Liesl double-crossed him. He is not having a very good day. He has another drink, and hears someone come in. He says, they need to turn the ship around. They’re going back. Spencer says he doesn’t take orders from Victor anymore, and Victor says he thought Spencer might come crawling back. If Spencer thinks he’s going to forgive… Spencer says he’s not here for forgiveness. It’s over, uncle.

Outside, Trina finds Curtis and Laura, and says, thank God she found them. Curtis asks what she’s doing here, and Trina says, they have to get out of here; there’s going to be an airstrike. Curtis says, they know all about the airstrike. They’ve got it under control. Laura says, it’s okay. They got in contact with the WSB. They told them that Victor’s trying to escape on the Haunted Star. Curtis says, the airstrike has been redirected, and Trina says, redirected where? Curtis says, the new target is the Haunted Star, and Trina says, but Spencer’s on that ship.

Victor says, now calm down, dear boy, and Spencer says, he’s not Victor’s boy. He walks up to Victor, and says, give him the pathogen, and they can both walk out of here alive. Victor says, how dare Spencer threaten him? He’s the head of their family. This is finished when he says it’s finished. Spencer tells him, he said, give him the pathogen. Hand it over. Victor says, Spencer will have to rip it out of his cold, dead fingers, and Spencer says, fine. He spins Victor around, cracking Victor’s head on the bar. Victor drops to the floor. Well if it was that easy, why didn’t Spencer do this long ago?

Nina comes out of Willow’s room, as Carly and Josslyn are walking toward it. Carly’s phone rings, and it’s Drew. Wow. These calls are going to cost a fortune. He asks if Carly can hear him, and she asks if he’s okay. What happened?

Michael asks, how was Willow’s talk with Nina? Did Willow get what she wanted out of her? Willow says she hopes so. Who knows? She wants to believe Nina’s sincere. Carly bursts in, and says, there’s someone who wants to talk to Willow, handing her the phone. Drew says, Willow? and she asks if he’s all right. He says, not only is he okay… Obrecht says she’s okay too. Not that anyone has asked. Willow says, Dr. Obrecht… Aunt Liesl. She’s so glad Obrecht is all right. Obrecht says, they’re on their way back. Then Willow can literally suck the life from her bones. Carly says, they can’t wait, and Drew says, he and Obrecht are on their way back. He’s not sure who’s joining them, but everyone should be back soon. Carly says she can’t wait to see him, and he says, him too. He and Obrecht move on.

Valentin says, Anna, and she says she loves him too. The door opens, and Anna says, get out. You’ll get infected. Holly says, kind of her to care, but don’t worry. She’s got the antidote. She holds up the vial, and Valentin smiles.

Hursley says, their satellite has eyes on the Haunted Star. It’s on the move. Robert says, Victor is trying to escape, and Hursley’s guys are going to stop him.

Spencer checks Victor’s pulse and says he’s glad he didn’t kill Victor, but that might not be a good thing. He bends down to get the cannister, and suddenly looks up.

Trina, Curtis, and Laura all look up, and Laura says, Victor’s on the Haunted Star, and Trina says, they have to call the WSB. Suddenly, the sky lights up, and Laura gasps.

On Monday, Michael says, that’s not going to happen, but Willow says, he doesn’t know that; Dante tells Carly that he thinks they have a case; and a body is recovered from the wreckage.

❄️ Building an Island…

It’s definitely impressive.

🤸🏽‍♀️ Pursuing Other Goals…

You can’t blame her. It must get old after a while when you have other things on your to-do list.

💐 Celebrating Amy…

A bouquet of gossip makes the perfect gift.

🎭 Close to Quitting…

It took me a while to warm up to her, since I really liked the other Trina, but she’s really made the part her own.

👠 From Her Arsenal…

Maybe Veronica is a psycho.

📠 Common Denominator…

Normally, I wouldn’t waste space on this harpy, but it struck me how she leaves a trail of unhappiness no matter which side of the Housewives fence she’s on. And if everyone else is an a-hole, maybe it’s time to look in the mirror.

🥀 Bringing Down the Curtain…

But where will everyone go on Gay Pride Day? Does she have to close down half of her name as well? Has James gone back to drinking heavily yet?

https://people.com/food/lisa-vanderpumps-la-restaurant-pump-is-closing-down/

🍸 The Karma Keeps On Comin’…

Check out the empty seats photo. I would say it’s sad, but it’s just not. He’s a pig.

Another gem from the Most Awful Human Being On the Planet. Maybe. He has a contender now.

She’ll give Howie some Lala and a run for his money. He’d better brush up on his VanderKnowledge.

👶🏻 Ahoy, Little Matey…

That kid looks full of mischief already. And he does kind of look like Chef Ben.

💸 Real Housewives Of Deadbeat…

I love the attorney’s pic.

🐕 Don’t Touch the Dog…

It’s about time for a salute to the ones who made it.

https://the-line-up.com/final-pets-horror-movies

🔥 Quotes of the Week

Whatever we believe about ourselves and our ability comes true for us. – Susan L. Taylor

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. – Mark Twain

When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.Wayne Dyer

Never confuse movement with action. – Ernest Hemingway

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. – Aristotle

Honest towards ourselves and towards anyone else who is our friend; brave towards the enemy; magnanimous towards the defeated; polite always: this is how the four cardinal virtues want us to act.Friedrich Nietzsche

Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.Henry Ford

The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you. – B. B. King (They can’t take integrity away from you either.)

People are making apocalypse jokes like there’s no tomorrow. – Ellie (Bella Ramsey), The Last of Us

🏃🏾‍♀️ Going Ahead and Jumping…

Boomerang back on Monday really Tuesday for soap, what’s on Deck, and the nightmare that won’t stop, Summer House. Until then, stay safe, stay not taking the last cup of coffee without making more, and stay letting it all go. Stop keeping score of who wronged who.

May 4, 2023 – More Rescue Comes To Greenland, Replacement, It’s a Wrap, Striking, VanderBits, All About That Met, Runway Roach, That Cat & Cantina

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Sonny meets Nina at Kelly’s, and asks if she’s thinking about Willow. She asks if it’s that obvious, and he says, Willow is Nina’s daughter; they’re all thinking about her. She says she doesn’t suppose he has news, and he says, on Liesl and everybody else? No, unfortunately. But he’s been doing some digging on who tipped off the SEC about Carly and Drew’s insider trading. (D’oh!) She asks what he found.

Carly tells TJ, it was exhaustion, right? First, there was all the excitement from the wedding, then the SEC showing up. The whole day sapped Willow of her energy. That’s why she passed out, right? TJ says, it could be exhausting for sure, especially for someone in her condition, and Michael says, but? TJ says he’s afraid it’s more than that.

Dex and Josslyn spoon on her bed, while looking at her laptop. She closes it, and says she’s sorry. She knows they put this on for distraction. Between Trina and Willow, now her mom and Drew… He says he gets it. It’s too much. She says, what if Drew and Liesl don’t make it back? and he says, one thing he learned in the military is, you have to hold onto hope, even in the worst of circumstances. You never know when the tide can shift. She says, could it shift now, please? Hope. He says, it’s powerful, and she says, then she’ll hold onto it, and pray Drew gets everybody home safely. He has to. Willow’s life depends on it.

Somewhere in Greenland. Spencer says, his grandmother is on the island with Drew, and Curtis says he’ll find them, come hell or high water. Trina says she knows Spencer’s grandmother is supposed to be a badass, but she faked out Victor Cassadine? Curtis says, it almost makes you feel sorry for the guy. Almost.

Victor tells his goons to stand down, and Drew says, very wise. Victor says, if Laura drops it, she dies, and Laura says, but so does he. She’s thinking it just might be worth it.

Helena says, there’s no way out, at least not earthly, and Valentin says, death. She says, what is death but another country? Come my son, let me take you away from everything, and everyone.

Victor says, Laura has no idea the power she has in her hands right now, and she holds up the vial, saying, she thinks she does. He tells her, then think of Willow. If Liesl dies, so does her innocent niece. Laura says, better to lose one innocent life than a whole world of them. She lifts the vial higher and away from herself, and he asks what she’s doing. She says, saving humanity.

Carly asks, what made Willow collapse tonight? but TJ says, Dr. Randolph is the specialist. He doesn’t want to say too much before they speak with her. Michael says he trusts TJ, and more important, Willow trusts him. Just tell them what’s going on. TJ says, Willow has some bleeding that’s not clotting, and Michael says, because of her low blood cell count. TJ says, they’ll be giving her something to get it under control, but all of this is an indication that her body’s breaking down, and she can’t produce enough cells to fight it. Michael says, they all get that they’re running out of time. Most important, he needs to know, what are they going to do about it?

Josslyn tells Dex that she keeps thinking about Willow’s wedding. For a while, nothing else mattered. Just the way they looked at each other, and the promises they made. What if Drew and Liesl don’t make it back in time? I think about how much I like Josslyn’s sweater, and Dex says, Drew Cain is an ex-Navy SEAL, remember? Those guys more than anyone know how to finish the job. She says she believes Drew’s going to get everybody home safe, but when he does, he and her mom have the SEC breathing down their necks. He says, Sonny’s working on that, and she says, that’s great. Sonny’s got the SEC following a false trail, and bought some more time – for now. But even if everything works out, and everything goes according to plan, Sonny’s going to end up in prison. Is Dex having second thoughts about that?

Sonny tells Nina, so far he’s come up empty, but whoever tipped off the SEC about Carly and Drew is going to be uncovered. He has his contacts at the SEC, and they’re trying to figure out what kind of case they have against Drew. That’s if he comes back. She tells him not to say that. Drew has to bring everybody back. He has to bring Aunt Liesl back, or else Willow… He says he’s praying for that. She knows he prays. But the SEC isn’t going to wait for Carly. She asks if they might charge Carly even without Drew here, and he says he doesn’t know about the rest of them, but he’s going to make sure Carly isn’t left holding the bag. She says, what if that’s not possible?

Hersley says, come on, Scorpio, as he takes Robert to the elevator, Felicia trailing them. Robert says, let him talk to the director, but Hersley says, if he’s referring to Frisco Jones, he’s been replaced. If Robert means the new director, he’s not taking Robert’s calls. Robert tells Hersley to call him. Tell him to abort the mission before the Bureau bombs that island. Hersley asks if he needs to remind Robert that he’s under arrest, and Robert asks if he needs to remind Hersley there are lives at stake. Felicia says, innocent lives, but Hersley says, there’s nothing he can do about that. Come on. Jordan and Diane come out of the elevator, and Diane says, sorry. She’s afraid DA Scorpio isn’t going anywhere. He tells her, says who? and Jordan tells him, says me.

Spencer says, his grandmother is more than a match for Uncle Victor, but it’s not going to be a fair fight. This place is crawling with guards. Curtis says, let him worry about Laura. The three of them, get to safety. Spencer says he’s not leaving his grandmother behind, but Curtis says, that’s exactly what he’s going to do. There’s a seaplane waiting offshore on the east side of the island. Just get there, and get the hell out of here. Trina says, what about him? but he says he’ll be fine. She says, he doesn’t know that. She can’t lose him now. Not before they even know if she’s his… She hugs him.

Victor says, Laura may be willing to die, but he doubts these two are. Drew says, Victor couldn’t be more wrong, and Obrecht says, Laura needs to know something… Victor says, silence her, and the goon holding her puts his hand over her mouth. Laura asks if Victor really thinks she’d hold her own life more precious than the lives of her children and grandchildren, and he says, very well. If she’s determined to play the role of a martyr, go ahead. Do it. Die for her cause before he kills her for it. She drops the vial, and it smashes on the floor.

Nothing happens, and Victor says he’s sorry. Did he forget to mention the pathogen has to be activated by UV light. Good old fashioned sunshine. Otherwise, it’s quite harmless. Isn’t that right Liesl? (Um… so how is Valentin infected? It’s been dark since they got there. Just saying.) Obrecht says she tried to warn Laura, and Victor says, sorry. Her martyrdom is just going to have to wait for another day. He tells the goon holding Obrecht that they need to keep the good doctor breathing long enough to test the antidote on their guinea pig.

Valentin says he’s not going anywhere with Helena, but she says, he’s dying. It’s time to accept reality. He was never good enough. Not for Anna, not for anyone. He says, that’s not true, and she says, they’ll all be better off without him. He doubles over in pain, and she says, there, there. It won’t be long now.

Curtis says, Trina’s not going to lose him, but they need to get out of here right now. Trina says, there’s a satellite phone behind the bar. She can call Jordan on the way, and tell her to send help. She runs behind the bar, and Curtis says, he doesn’t have to tell Spencer how hugely important that young lady is to him. He’s counting on Spencer to get her out of here to safety. The pilot has orders to take off as soon as they’re on board. Do not wait for him, no matter how much Trina begs him. Understood? He needs to know he can trust Spencer. Spencer nods, and Trina says she’s got it. Curtis says, it’s time to move. Be smart, and be safe. Trina says, that goes double for him, and he kisses the top of her head. He starts to leave, and Trina says, she knows everything is uncertain right now, but she… He says he knows. Him too. He jets.

Carly asks TJ if there’s anything they can do for Willow. Just name it and it’s done. TJ says he defers to whatever Dr. Randolph thinks is best, and raising his voice, Michael says, Dr. Randolph isn’t here… Sorry. TJ tells him not to apologize, and Michael says, just tell him what to do so he can bring Willow home. TJ says, that’s just it; he doesn’t think Willow should go home. Not if they want to buy her more time. Michael says, of course (🍷) that’s the goal, and Carly asks if hospice is an option. TJ says, it’s always an option. They will definitely keep Willow comfortable as she transitions. Michael says, transitions? To death? TJ says he hates this too, and Carly says, what if she stays here? TJ says, then they can treat her symptoms as they develop. She has a chance of surviving until Drew gets here, but he’s not going to lie. Willow will be in a great deal of pain. Her enlarged lymph nodes are putting pressure on her organs. Michael says he brings his wife home to die comfortably or she stays in the hospital, suffering to survive, or maybe not, and TJ says, it’s a horrible choice. Carly says, but one he has to make.

Dex asks, what makes Josslyn think he’s having second thoughts? and she says, because he sees something in Sonny that she and Michael don’t. And she gets it. She used to see it too. It’s not as easy to turn Sonny in as he thought, is it? He says, Michael hired him to do a job, and he intends to finish it. The job, if he hadn’t taken, would have never brought him to her. She says, so no regrets, and he says, it’s not a regret to admit two things can be true. (GH’s favorite phrase.) She says, such as? and he says, Sonny’s breaking Federal law, violating the NSA, and deserves to be in prison. He also saved Dex’s life when he didn’t have to. So when the Feds come for Sonny, he’s going to feel bad, but his part in this is over. He got the footage and gave it to Michael. It’s in her brother’s hands now.

Sonny says he could kill Ned for putting Carly and Drew in this position, and Nina says, Ned? He says, that’s what the Quartermaines do. Michael’s distracted, Valentin and Drew are off the grid, so Ned is going to make his move. She says, it’s a good thing the SEC didn’t hold Carly overnight, and Sonny says he bought Drew some time also. She says, it’s really wonderful of him. She’s sure Michael and Carly were very grateful. He says he’s not looking for a pat on the back, and she says, of course (🍷) he’s not. That doesn’t mean she can’t give him one. He says, here’s the thing. He’s going to do everything he can for his family. He doesn’t care what’s going on between them. If somebody messes with one of us, they mess with all of us. He’s telling her right now, if Ned had anything to do with it, he’d better brace himself. Nina says she’s been thinking about what he said about flying down to the islands, and he says, she told him that she didn’t want to go. She says she reconsidered. How soon can they leave? He says he thought she didn’t want to go with everything happening with Willow, and she says she’s a little uneasy about it, but he made a point when he said they could get back to Port Charles in a few hours. She thinks they need a little time alone to recharge and regroup. When they get back home, they’ll be more ready to help whoever needs them. She knows he’s dealing with a big business thing. Is that going to stop him from getting away? He says he took care of it, and she asks if that’s a yes. He tells her to let him make a call. If I were Nina, I’d head to Nixon Falls right about now, and never look back.

Josslyn tells Dex that she doubts Michael is going to call the Feds on Sonny any time soon. He’s so focused on Willow. Dex says, totally understandable, and she says, but it’s not great for him. He says, until Michael puts Sonny away, he’s always going to be looking over his shoulder, wondering if it’s the end, if Sonny’s onto him. Who wants to live like that? She says, not her, and he says, him either. She says, still, for this last little bit of time, before all hell breaks loose, and her whole family is divided between Team Sonny and Team Michael, she’s just going to enjoy the peace. And she’s so glad she gets to enjoy it with him. She kisses him, and his phone rings. He looks at it, and she says, what’s wrong? He shows her it’s Sonny calling, and he says, boss. Sonny says, Brick is using his jet, and he needs Dex to call a private airstrip and have them charter a plane as soon as possible. He’ll send Dex the contact information. Dex says, destination? and Sonny says, paradise. Josslyn asks what he wanted, and Dex says, a plane out of town… tonight. She says, he doesn’t think Sonny knows what he and Michael are planning, but he says, no. If Sonny was onto him, he’d be the one leaving town, and Sonny would make sure he never came back.

TJ says, Michael and Willow are married now, so while she’s unconscious, what happens next is up to him. Michael says, Willow wouldn’t want to die in the hospital. The lights, the sounds, she hates it all so much. Carly says she knows Michael wants to respect that, but what if keeping her here means she doesn’t die? Michael says, there are so many variables, none of which he has any control over. He doesn’t know. He has to think. He walks off, and Carly thanks TJ for being so steady around Michael. She knows it’s torture for him too. He says he just wishes he could do more, for both of them. She says, they all do. She wants to be strong for Michael, but most of the time, she just wants to curl in a ball. He says, but she doesn’t. That’s what matters. She’s here by Michael’s side, offering any support he needs. He’s lucky to have her. She says, he’s lucky to have TJ too. They all are.

Sitting by Willow’s bedside, Michael says he hates the thought of Willow being in more pain. It’s the second to the last thing he wants. He takes her hand and wonders how they got here. He flashes back to Willow saying, they’re getting married. She’s going to be his wife. She knows they have this scary thing looming over them, but she doesn’t want it to overshadow the fact they’re marrying each other, and they love each other. Whether they get 60 hours or 60 years, he’s her guy. He remembers telling Willow that it’s the last time he’s going to see her before she becomes his wife, and he wants to remember this moment. She says she’ll never forget it. He flashes back to their wedding, and telling her that he’s grateful for her friendship and her courage, her love and compassion. And most important, how she’s been such an amazing mother to Wiley, and now Amelia. The fact that he gets to call her his wife… Willow says, Michael?

Josslyn tells Dex that he needs to be really careful. Nothing gets past Sonny, and if he’s starting to suspect… He says he’ll be careful, when her phone rings. She says, mom? and Carly says, it’s Willow. Josslyn asks, what happened?… She’s on her way. She tells Dex that Willow’s been taken to the hospital, and he says he’ll drive her, but she says, he has to stay here and deal with Sonny, and she has to be with her family. He says he’ll walk her out, and she says, that she’ll take him up on.

Hersley says, this is a matter of national… no, international security. Jordan has no jurisdiction here. Diane says, that’s actually for a judge to decide, a precedent set by Chandler versus the United States. Robert says he just loves when she talks precedents, and Hersley says, this is Felicia’s doing, isn’t it? Felicia says she has faith in Mayor Collins and her friends. Just give them a chance to come through. Hersley says, faith is nice, but those bombs are a sure thing, and Diane says, the only sure thing in his future is a discussion about DA Scorpio’s civil rights. She would take those handcuffs off him, unless Hersley wants them to be part of that discussion. By all means, contact his superiors. She of course (🍷) will be contacting the Federal District Court. Hersley takes the cuffs off Robert, and leaves with Diane. Jordan tells Robert, she hates to say it, but Hersley may be right. If Laura and the rest of them fail… Felicia says, they won’t, and Robert says, it won’t matter unless he can talk that new director into calling off the drone strike.

Trina thinks the baby is going to need another blanket, but Spencer tells her to wait. He doesn’t like the idea of her going off on her own right now. She says, two minutes; he can time her. She leaves, and Spencer bounces Ace, saying, it’s just us, buddy. Just him, and Ace… He hears something, and says, that was fast. He turns to see the creepy nanny, and says, she’s not Trina. She says she most certainly isn’t, and he says he doesn’t think he ever got her name. She says, no, but she knows his, young Mr. Cassadine, and he and that baby aren’t going anywhere.

Victor says, Drew is now useless to him, and Goon143 shoves Drew to his knees. An alarm goes off, and Victor wonders, what’s that? Laura asks if Drew brought a plus one, and Drew says he thought she did. Victor says he knew there were more of them, and tells the Goon Squad to kill them. Something blows up in the hallway, and there’s smoke everywhere. Everyone ducks down, and Anna comes in with a gun.

There’s some shooting back and forth, and Victor says, go get her. Goon231 runs out.

Creepy nanny says, there’s plenty of security on this ship. Nice big fellows who can stop Spencer from leaving. (Ha-ha! Ace looks worried – baby acting!) But they don’t want the baby involved in the struggle, so why doesn’t he just hand Ace over? Spencer says he has a better idea. Why doesn’t she go back to the stateroom, and forget she ever saw them. She says, the senior Mr. Cassadine hired her to take care of the baby. She won’t disappoint him. She puts on the radio, and says, anyone on this channel, there’s been a breach… Trina whacks her over the head from behind, and she goes down. Trina says, less than two minutes? and he says, her timing’s perfect.

Carly tells TJ that Josslyn should be here any moment, and he asks how she’s handling everything. Carly says, like mother, like daughter, when Josslyn comes out of the elevator. She puts on a brave face, but like everyone else, she’s terrified. Josslyn asks who Carly is calling terrified, and they hug. Josslyn says, Carly’s right; she’s terrified. Carly says, her too.

Michael asks how Willow is feeling, and she says she’s okay, she thinks. What happened? He says, she passed out, and he took her to the hospital. She says, they were talking about Sonny, and he says, they’re done with that conversation, he promises. But first… She says, they need to focus on her health, and he says, she needs that transplant. She says she really wants to be home with him and the kids, and he says he wants that too; all of them do. But her best chance, her only chance, is to stay here in the hospital.

Sonny says, they’re going to go by Nina’s place, pick up her clothes, put them in a bag, and go to the airstrip. She says, sounds perfect, and he says, she doesn’t have to bring a lot of clothes, right? She says, is that so? and he says, it is so. They kiss, when Dex walks in, and says, everything’s been arranged, but there’s been a development. Sonny says, with the plane? but Dex says, with Willow.

Helena tells Valentin, don’t fight it. The pain will soon be over. He says he’ll take complete agony over eternity with her, and she says, such a waste. She could have made a legend out of him. Instead, he’s just one more corpse.

Anna and Drew fight with Victor’s goons, and Laura reaches for the cannister on the lab table, but Victor puts a gun to her head, and says, don’t.

Nina asks Dex, what about Willow? Did she have another episode? Dex says he doesn’t have any details, and she says, whatever he knows. Please. He says, Carly called Josslyn, and said Willow collapsed and was rushed to GH. Joss went to meet her mom; he came straight here. Sonny says, call the airstrip and cancel the flight, and tells Nina, let’s go.

Josslyn asks if Willow is going to be okay, but Carly says she doesn’t know. Her only chance is a transplant. Josslyn says, and they can’t have that without Liesl, and Carly wonders where they are. Josslyn says, she still hasn’t heard from Drew? and Carly says, they have to be okay, and they have to come home now. Josslyn asks how much time they have, and Carly says, not enough.

Willow asks what Dr. Randolph says, and Michael says he hasn’t talked to her. It’s TJ’s opinion that if she wants to hold on until Drew and Liesl get home, she’s got to stay in the hospital for treatment. She says she can come in every day, but he says, they want her constantly monitored so they can treat any symptoms that may arise in real time. She says, assuming Drew and Liesl come back in time… but he says, they can’t think that way. They’re going to come back. And there’s a whole team of specialists here who are in her corner, who want to keep her alive, but it starts with her. She has to do her part. Willow says, and her part is spending what could be her last days away from her family, but Michael tells her that he’ll bring Wiley and Amelia here whenever he can. He knows this goes against everything she wanted, but they’re down to the wire. This is their last shot. Please tell him that she’ll take it.

Spencer tells Trina, the nanny from hell is locked in the stateroom. She’s going to have a nasty headache when she wakes up, but she’ll be okay. They hear shooting, and Trina asks what they do. He tells her, they do what Curtis said. They have to get his brother to safety. The seaplane isn’t going to wait for them forever. She tells Spencer that she has to call Jordan, and hands him the baby.

There’s more fighting with Anna and Drew, and Victor tells Laura, step away. Anna gets hit hard.

Josslyn asks how Carly is holding up. She’s the one who got drug out of a wedding by the SEC. Carly says she cares about the charges, but she cares more about Willow and Michael, and what they’re going through. Willow was weak before, let’s hope this SEC situation doesn’t push her past her breaking point. (Um… I don’t think that’s what did it. Throwing mental guilt darts at Michael.) Josslyn says, that’s on Ned, and Carly says, what he did was vindictive and cruel, and she honestly didn’t expect it from him. Josslyn asks if she thought there were lines he wouldn’t cross, and Carly says she guesses she did. She knows the Quartermaines play dirty; they blackmail each other over their morning coffee. But the way everyone rallied around Michael and Willow for the wedding, she thought it was sincere. Now, when Willow’s waiting for a transplant, it’s thoughtless and reckless. She really didn’t think this was Ned, but maybe it is. What is she talking about? She’s the one who gave him the opening. It’s all on her. Josslyn protests, but Carly says, it is. Drew and Michael separately and together begged her not to get involved. They didn’t want her to buy any Aurora stock, but she did because she had to help. So much for helping. Josslyn says, so buying that stock wasn’t great, and Carly says, it was terrible. Josslyn says she understands, but Carly was just trying to help someone she loved. Intentions matter. Carly says, they sure do; the road to hell’s paved with them. Josslyn says, what Carly set out to do was good. What Ned set out to do was harmful. Carly was just trying to help someone she loved, and Ned wanted to inflict damage. Carly says, Ned called in the SEC because her and Drew’s actions made them vulnerable. Josslyn says, that’s awful, but she’s having a hard time believing Ned wanted them to show up at the wedding. Carly says can’t believe anyone would want to do that to Michael and Willow; ruin their special day. Josslyn says, their special day wasn’t ruined. Carly saw the looks on their faces when they exchanged their vows. They were so happy and they were so in love, and she genuinely believes that’s what’s going to get Willow to hold on. Carly says she wants to believe that too, when Josslyn’s phone rings. She says, it’s Dex, and steps away. She asks if everything is okay, and he says, everything’s fine. He just saw Sonny and Nina, and thought she’d want to know. Sonny and Nina walk in, and she says, they’re coming to the hospital. He says he takes it they’re already there, and she says, they just got here. He says, sorry there wasn’t more of a heads up. Sonny and Nina walk over to Carly, and they give each other soap looks.

Willow tells Michael, if Drew is putting his life on the line to bring Liesl back to them, then she needs to do whatever she can to make the risk worth it. He says, so she’ll stay and fight? and she says, with everything in her.

Anna rallies, and totally kicks the ass of the goon who punched her. Victor tells Obrecht that they’re leaving. Laura says, Victor, and he says, goodbye, Laura, shooting her. She falls, and he hustles Obrecht out the door. Goon47 points his gun at Anna, but a shot from somewhere downs him. Anna sees Curtis, and says, good shot. He says, thanks. Is she okay. She says she is, and he goes to Laura, who’s already up. She says she’s okay; it’s just a graze. Drew asks where Victor is, and Laura says, he took Obrecht, and the pathogen, and ran out. Curtis goes after them.

Trina asks if Jordan can hear her, and Jordan says she can. Where is she? Trina says, on the Haunted Star with Spencer and Ace, and Jordan says, listen to her. She has to get off that boat now. Trina says, they know, but… Jordan says, there are drones on their way to drop bombs on the entire island, and they have no way to stop them. Take the baby and get to the seaplane before it’s too late.

Outside, Victor tells Obrecht, come on. Keep moving. They’re going to leave just the way they came; get moving. He pushes her along, and I think, why do they always have to give their captive a push? A voice says, going somewhere? and Victor turns to see Holly with a gun pointed at him. Obrecht smiles.

Anna comes back with Drew, who says, they have the guards tied up in the hall; they’re not going anywhere. Anna tells Drew that he has to go after Victor. He can’t escape with the pathogen. Drew jets, and Anna asks Laura, where’s Valentin? Laura says, he’s in the isolation room. Victor used him as a test subject for the pathogen. Anna says, oh my God, and runs out. Laura says, let’s find Trina and Spencer now, and as she and Curtis pass a computer screen, Laura looks at it. It’s got some staticky lines going in and out, and it’s making noises like dial-up used to. Curtis says, what’s that? and Laura says she knows that sound. She looks pretty worried.

Helena tells Valentin, let go. Doesn’t he trust his mother? He says, there’s only one person he trusts with his life. He cries, and says, there’s only one. He looks up, and sees Anna looking through the window. He smiles.

Curtis says, they have to get out of here and catch up with the others before that seaplane takes off without them, but Laura says, they can’t go right now. He says, why not? and she says, this computer. It’s like the one that controlled Mikkos’s weather machine. The one from forty years ago.

So it is dial-up.

Tomorrow, Willow wants to see someone; Anna won’t let Valentin die; Trina says she’s not leaving Spencer; Holly tells Victor that he failed again; and Victor says, he could have fixed the world if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids. Okay, not really on that last one, but I want it so much.

🔃 Wait, What…?

Apparently, we’re getting a new Kristina.

🦸🏽 It Was the Pathogen…

It would be awesome if the pathogen turned Valentin into a superhero. In his off-time, he’s halfway there.

📝 Strike That…

I suppose it comes down to how long the strike goes on.

But in a pinch, you can watch this.

🍸 A Little Bit Of Scandoval In Your Life…

Small favors.

Sandoval’s picture is next to cliché in the dictionary.

💃🏾 To the Met and Beyond…

The fashion.

https://okmagazine.com/p/new-york-socialite-kamie-lightburn-dishes-best-met-gala-looks/

https://www.instyle.com/met-gala-2023-red-carpet-7480093

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/style-beauty/fashion/g43757161/best-worst-dressed-met-gala-2023/

https://www.eonline.com/photos/36008/met-gala-2023-red-carpet-fashion

In case you need explanation.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/who-was-karl-lagerfeld-2023-met-gala-theme-explained/

After the ball is over.

https://people.com/style/met-gala-2023-afterparty-outfits/

🪳 Uninvited Guest…

But who was he wearing?

https://www.etonline.com/cockroach-goes-viral-after-crashing-the-2023-met-gala-red-carpet-203807

🐱 Best Thing Ever…

And of course, the cat.

https://people.com/pets/choupette-cat-responds-met-gala-outfits-jared-leto-doja-cat/

🧺 Bringing Out the Sheaves…

Set a spell tomorrow for some soap, freshly brewed tea, words of importance (or not), and music for May. Until then, stay safe, stay respecting other people’s time and not being late, and stay holding onto hope, even in the worst circumstances. You never know when the tide can shift.  

May 3, 2023 – Valentin Sees Someone From the Past, Sandoval and Raquel Tie With Jax For Most Awful Human Beings On Earth & Don’t

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Somewhere in Greenland. Goon3 yells, go get her! and Goon1 runs after Trina. Curtis intercepts him, knocking the gun from his hand, kicking his ass, and tossing him all around the room. Goon3 leaves Spencer on the floor, and jets up the ramp, but Curtis kicks his ass too. Trina runs to Spencer, and tells him, please wake up. Goon1 gets up, and actually moves a chair out of the way to give them more room. He asks Curtis if that’s all he’s got.

Michael calls for an ambulance to come to the gatehouse, 66 Harborview Road. His wife passed out, and she’s unconscious. She has Stage IV leukemia… Yes, she’s breathing. Get here as soon as they can. He tells Willow to stay with him.

Elizabeth asks why TJ isn’t at the wedding. She thought he and Molly would be dancing the night away. He says, that was the plan, but the reception never happened. He got paged to cover for another resident who called in sick. She asks if Willow is okay, and he says, Willow’s fine, thank God. Her mother-in-law, not so much.

Carly sits with a slice of uneaten pie in front of her at Kelly’s. She gets up and asks for the check, and the waitress asks if there was something wrong with the pie. Carly says, no. She just thought being here would give her more comfort. You know, the kind of thing you tell a waitress. Her Great Aunt Ruby used to own this place. She was a strong woman, a survivor. She really knew how to beat the odds. They still use her pie recipe. The waitress says she can wrap it up, but Carly says, that’s okay. She’s not in the mood for pie. She’ll just take the check. She gives the waitress her credit card, but when the waitress runs it through, she says, it was declined.

At the hospital on the phone, Felicia leaves a message for Robert, saying, Andre brought her up to speed about Victor possibly having a biological weapon. Apparently, the Bureau has suspected he and his brother have developed one. Robert would be wise to be concerned about what the Bureau might do next. She knows she is. Call her back. Please.

Robert asks where Agent Hersley took Scotty, and Hersley says, he’s being debriefed. The Bureau appreciates his willingness to be so forthcoming about the activities of Victor Cassadine. Robert says, Baldwin doesn’t have all the facts. Neither does the Bureau unless he can talk to them. Let him out of here. Blocking the door, Hersley asks where all this information was before Scotty started talking. Now sit down and do what he’s been doing best; keeping his mouth shut.

Obrecht says, Valentin’s heartrate is falling rapidly, and Victor says, the pathogen is vicious. He tells Valentin that he may want to reconsider his silence. His suffering is in vain. They will find his companion. It’s a small island. He can’t guarantee the condition they’ll be in when they’re brought to him. Valentin says he told Victor, he came alone, and Victor asks if this misplaced loyalty is really worth it. The pathogen has already begun it’s work. Valentin can already feel it ravaging his body. It doesn’t care about him; doesn’t care he’s a father. He’s merely it’s host, and it’s just getting started.

Carly asks the waitress to try another card, and she does, but says, sorry. Carly says, what the hell? Is she sure the card reader is working? The waitress says, it hasn’t happened all night. Maybe Carly should call her bank. Carly says, maybe she has some cash, and digs in her bag. (Never leave the house without a 20 dollar bill is my motto.) Nina says, she’ll get it, and hands the waitress her card.

Elizabeth says, they came to the Quartermaines to get Carly? and TJ says, fortunately, the wedding was over. Michael and Willow are officially husband and wife. She says she still doesn’t understand the urgency. Didn’t someone explain to the SEC what was going on? He says, Molly tried pulling one of them away to explain the situation, but they didn’t care. Then he was paged to come in and cover, so they had to leave. She says, how much can one family endure? and he says, the last thing Michael and Willow need is another crisis. Still, they handled it well. She says she’s sure it helped that they were legally married, and he says, you could see how much it meant to both of them; they were so happy. Despite the treatments and the disease, Willow looked radiant. Elizabeth says she doesn’t know where Willow finds the strength after everything she’s been through, and just having given birth, and having two small kids. Then again, that’s reason enough to keep fighting, isn’t it? Kids have a way of making you pull it all together and keeping you in the present, especially when you’re with them. He says, Willow’s been so brave. Her strength comes from her family. This time with them has meant everything to her. She says, maybe it takes having kids to realize that. She never thought she’d take quality time with a toddler over a spa retreat. He says he can actually see that with Willow. When she’s with Wiley and Amelia, it’s like nothing else matters. She’s their mom, not… Elizabeth says, a woman with Stage IV cancer.

The paramedics have Willow on a gurney, and put an oxygen mask on her. Brook comes running in, and says, oh my God. Michael tells her, the kids are upstairs… and Tracy walks in. She says she saw the ambulance from the house; what happened? Michael says he doesn’t know. They were talking about Sonny, he was worked up about something, and Willow fainted. Oh my God, it was too much. Is this his fault? I say, yes! and Brook hugs Michael.

Robert picks up the phone, and Hersley says, what’s wrong? No dial tone? Robert says, he had it disconnected, and Hersley tells him to have a seat. It might take a while before his superiors get here. Well, that would be the first time it took anyone a while to get anywhere lately. Robert says, they’re wasting time, but Hersley says he’s not interested in a word Robert says. Not after everything he’s been keeping from the Bureau – his former colleagues. Robert says, this is so stupid. He’s worried about the end of mankind, and Hersley’s worried about whether he’s in the loop. Just let him out of here. Hersley tells him again to have a seat, and Robert asks if Hersley thinks he can keep him here. Hersley laughs, and Robert wonders why that’s funny. He punches Hersley, but Hersley gets the better of him and cuffs him to the bed.

Valentin is in obvious distress, and Obrecht says, his vital signs are too low. She’s going to administer the antidote. Victor tells her to wait, and she says, his haste has caused her to skip necessary steps and protocols. She needs to test the antidote on humans, and she can’t do that if the human is dead. He says, not dead yet, and she asks if he wants to know if the antidote is viable. That is why he kidnapped her, is it not? If he’s going to ignore her expertise, let her go back to Port Charles where she’s really needed. Where she can actually save a life. He asks, what is the point in testing the antidote mere moments into the infection? It’s hardly practical. As a scientist, doesn’t she want to know how effective the antidote is in the later stages? She says, holding off on administering the antidote is putting his son’s life in jeopardy. He claims this is for science, but something tells her it’s not the ethics of the protocol he’s testing; more like Valentin’s endurance of pain. He says, maybe it’s both. Valentin is made of strong stuff. Valentin knows he can end this at any moment. All he has to do is talk.

Goon1 punches Curtis, but Curtis flips him over a table. Apparently, he didn’t move enough furniture. Curtis runs over to Trina, and asks if Spencer is breathing. Goon1 gets up, and Trina says, Curtis… Curtis turns around just in time, and punches Goon1 out, then body slams him over the bar. He checks to make sure Goon1 isn’t getting up, but he’s out cold.

Drew brings Laura in as she pretends to struggle. He tells a guard that he found her, and boss wants him to put her with the other prisoners. Goon4 asks if he’s sure. Victor’s nephew and his girlfriend are on the ship with a baby. The doctor is the only other one here, and she’s in with the boss. He’ll call… Drew says he’ll call Victor, but Goon4 says, it’s against protocol. Drew says he’s just following orders, and takes out his phone. Laura acts like she’s in pain and cries out, falling against Goon4.

Brook tells Michael that she knows the routine, and he leaves with the paramedics. Brook says, she’s going to make it, right? and Tracy says, of course (🍷) she is.

Carly says she’s got it, and gives the waitress some cash. Nina says, those card readers glitch all the time, and asks, how was the wedding? Carly says, it was beautiful. She knows everybody says that about every wedding, but Michael and Willow’s wedding was truly beautiful. They had the ceremony in the Quartermaine living room where they got married before. That first wedding put Michael in a better position so he could fight Nelle for custody. It’s kind of ironic in retrospect that Nelle gets credit for Michael and Willow coming together. That’s two blessings that Nelle’s responsible for; the other being Wiley. Of course (🍷) in the negative column, Nelle did try to murder Michael, and she used Willow’s dead infant to make Michael believe Wiley was dead. Nina asks if she’s enjoying this, but Carly says, no. She’s just realizing that Nelle didn’t even know she used her dead nephew as a prop. She points this out because Nina has a tendency to sentimentalize Nelle. She thinks it’s fair to remind Nina that Nelle was a horrible person. (Yeah, okay. Let’s not get into how it kind of circles back to Carly in the beginning.) Back to the wedding. It was beautiful. It was wonderful. Michael and Willow stood there and promised to love and honor each other as long as they both shall live. So now they pray Drew finds Dr. Obrecht before the SEC finds Drew.

Robert says, there’s plenty more where that came from, as Hersley dabs his eye with a cloth. Hersley says, attacking a WSB agent wasn’t wise. Robert just blew any shot at getting anyone to listen to him. Robert says, the Bureau heard just a portion of Baldwin’s story about a biological agent. They’re going to bomb that island into the stone age; standard operating procedure. But what they don’t know is that he’s already got a team in place, waiting to take Victor out. He just needs more time. Hersley says, that’s not his problem; not his call. Robert says, call the director, when there’s a knock at the door. Hersley steps out, and Felicia says she was looking for her friend Anna Devane. Isn’t this her room? Robert yells, Felicia! Call Frisco! Hersley dashes back in, closing the door.

While Goon4 is busy trying to figure out what’s happening, Laura runs to the other wall, and Drew punches him out. She asks Drew to take the zip-tie off, and he does. She asks, what’s next? and he says, they don’t have a lot of time before Victor’s people figure out what’s going on. He has to stash this guy before someone stumbles on him. He drags Goon4 away, and Laura looks through a window into the lab. She goes in and looks around. Drew comes back, and says, what the hell? What is this place? She says, Victor’s playground.

Valentin doubles over, and Obrecht says, let her administer the antidote now, but Victor says, try it, and it will be the last thing she does. He tells Valentin that they’re going to find his companion sooner or later. He has to realize the time he’s buying for them comes at a terrible cost. Is he really willing to pay with his life? To leave Charlotte fatherless? He’ll try to stand in for Valentin as best he can, but he thinks she’d prefer her papa. Valentin says, no! They are… Victor says, they are where?

Trina begs Spencer to wake up, and Curtis says, the guards are tied up, but they have to get out of here. Chances are, they heard the noise and will be here any minute. She asks him to help her carry Spencer, but he says, there’s no time for that. They’ve got to go. She says she won’t leave him, and Curtis says he’ll come back and get Spencer, but she says, no.

Victor says, where are they? Who was with you? Valentin says, it’s burning, and his vision blurs. Victor says, where are they? Who are they? Obrecht asks, what use is Valentin to him like this? This has gone too far. Let her give him the antidote. Valentin asks what Victor is trying to save… It’s burning. Obrecht says, Valentin is still Victor’s son. She saw how affected he was when he thought Valentin was dead. Victor says, that was before his betrayal; before his disloyalty. She says, save him before it’s too late, but he says, his son’s intransigence will cost him his life. She says, then he is his father’s son. He’ll die because his own father was too vindictive and stubborn to save his life. Victor says, they’re done here, and drags Obrecht away. Valentin’s body jerks.

Curtis says, slide over and let him help, when Spencer comes to. He asks if Trina is okay. What happened? Curtis says, they’ll do a play-by-play later. They’ve got to find Spencer’s little brother and get out of here. Can Spencer stand up? They help Spencer to his feet, and Curtis asks if he’s good. Spencer says he has to be for Ace, and Trina says, Ace is in one of the staterooms. He’s with some creepy nurse right now. Curtis says, they’ll get him, and Spencer thanks him. Curtis tells them, let’s go now, and they leave.

Willow is in a hospital bed, and outside the room, Michael asks what they’re doing. TJ says he knows Michael wants to be in there to encourage her and hold her hand, but he can’t. Michael says, let him by, but TJ asks if Michael wants him to waste precious time arguing or let him do his job. They’ll bring him in when they can. Look at him. They’ve got this. He promises. Michael nods, and TJ goes in, closing the door.

Brook comes downstairs, and says, Wiley and Amelia are asleep. Tracy says, small favors, and Brook says, some wedding night, huh? Poor Willow and Michael. Tracy says, in her experience, wedding nights are way overrated. Did she ever tell Brook about hers with Brook’s grandfather? Brook says, let’s pretend you did, and Tracy says, there she was, the blushing bride, with the impressive Lord Ashton, or so she thought at the time. She came out of the bathroom expecting Puccini on the record player and rose petals on the bed. Instead, she had her husband, out cold, drunk as a skunk. Brook says, no foreshadowing there, and Tracy says, hopefully, Brook’s wedding night with Chase will be much more successful. Brook asks where that came from. She and Chase aren’t even dating. Tracy says, give it time. After what Brook did for him – actually, what she did for him – the least he can do is make an honest woman out of Brook. Brook says she’s super grateful for Tracy stepping in with the CCRB, but Chase already has his badge back, so why does Tracy think she can still hold this over Brook’s head?

Nina says, what about the SEC? and Carly says, Sonny didn’t tell her that the SEC agents hauled her out of Michael and Willow’s wedding? Nina says, he did mention it, and Carly says, it turns out the SEC are more interested in Drew than they are in her. When she couldn’t tell them where Drew was, they threatened to hold her overnight. Fortunately, Drew’s name turned up on a manifest going from San Diego to Hawaii. Nina asks how she managed that, and Carly says, if Sonny didn’t tell Nina, she’s not getting into it. The problem is, when the SEC realizes Drew isn’t in Hawaii, they’re going to resume their search. And if they find Drew before Drew finds Liesl… Hopefully, Drew has a big enough lead, but all they can do right now is hope. Anyway, back to the wedding… Nina says, that’s okay. She’s heard enough about the wedding. Carly says, Willow’s happy, very happy, when Ava comes in. She tells Nina, sorry she’s late, and asks Carly, how was the wedding? Carly says, that seems to be everybody’s favorite topic of conversation, forgetting Nina just said she’d heard enough. The wedding was beautiful, Avery did a great job, and it was a lovely evening for everyone who was invited. Carly’s phone rings, and she heads out, asking them to tell the waitress to keep the change and the pie. Ava asks, what did Nina do to Carly now?

Outside on the phone, Carly asks Michael, what’s going on? He says, Willow collapsed. They’re at GH. Carly says she’ll be right there. She looks inside at Nina sitting down with Ava, and leaves.

Drew says, they should keep moving, but Laura says, the guard told them Liesl was here with Victor. He probably wants her for her medical knowledge, right? Why else would she be here? He says, they’ll figure it out later. They have to find Valentin. She picks up the cannister, asking, what’s this? and I yell, put that down! He goes over to her, and she says, it’s written in German. He wonders what it says, when Victor and Obrecht arrive with the Goon team. Victor says he’s sure Dr. Obrecht will be more than happy to translate.

Tracy asks what Brook means, hold it over her head, and Brook says, Tracy already knows. When does she plan to cash in? Tracy says, Brook is just like her father, always thinking of things in terms of money and exchange, like they’re all little stocks that go up and down. Brook says, so Tracy was happy to help Chase. She just did it out of the goodness of her heart? Tracy says, maybe it occurred to her that it might come in handy to have a police officer in her debt. Brook says, Chase owes Tracy nothing. It was all her. She’s the only one who owes Tracy. Tracy says she just wants her family to be happy and healthy. She didn’t do it for Chase. She did it for Brook, and for what she wants out of their relationship… They see Wiley coming down the stairs, and he asks Brook, where’s his mommy?

TJ tells Elizabeth some medical stuff, and says, she seemed so happy. Elizabeth says, she wanted that wedding more than anything. It must have been more than she could take. In the hallway, Michael flashes back to the wedding, and Willow telling him how she was falling in love with him. Since then her love has only grown, and she’s fulfilled in ways she never thought possible because of him and their kids.

Ava looks at the menu, and tells Nina, the problem is that Kelly’s doesn’t serve martinis and she could really use a martini right now. Nina suggests she try a hot chocolate, and the waitress comes. Ava gets a black coffee, and Nina orders a decaf latte. Nina thanks Ava for meeting her, and Ava says, of course (🍷). Nina sounded concerned and worried. What’s going on with her and Carly? She didn’t crash the wedding, did she? Nina says, she didn’t, but someone did. It seems that when the government’s money is on the line, the SEC bureaucrats act with lightning speed. Ava says, the SEC showed up at the wedding? That’s terrible for Willow, but it’s more or less what Nina wanted. Nina says, that’s not what she wanted. She didn’t want to ruin Willow’s wedding, and didn’t know they were going to freeze all of Carly’s assets. Ava says, ouch. Nina better hope Carly doesn’t find out who snitched. Nina says she spoke to Martin, and he assured her the SEC won’t trace it back to her. Ava says, so Nina’s in the clear. Forget the coffee; let’s go get some champagne. Nina says, Ava doesn’t understand. Carly isn’t the only one facing consequences. Drew could be facing charges too. Ava says, Nina knew that would happen when she turned them in, but Nina says she didn’t know Drew would be out there somewhere trying to save her daughter’s life.

Victor says, Mr. Cain, as he lives and breathes. He had a hunch Laura might be part of his son’s entourage, but Drew’s presence is a real bonus. It’s kind of a full circle moment, since he’d hoped Drew would provide him with this location, but Drew failed. Drew says, actually Victor failed to access his memory, and Victor says, it’s still a pity all the years Drew wasted, pointless, because here he is. Drew lunges for him, but the guards grab him, and Victor asks if he’s still trying to take on the world single-handedly. Laura slips something into her pocket from the lab table, and Victor asks when Drew will ever learn. He turns his attention to Laura, and says, she’s butting in where she’s not wanted, as always. This is a bit of a full circle moment too. Her… here… with him… at the very end. She asks what he means, the very end?

Hersley asks if Robert wants him to gag him too, and Robert yells for Felicia to call Frisco. It’s a matter of life and death. The Bureau knows about the virus. Call off the emergency protocol. Anna and the others are on the island. Hersley puts tape over Robert’s mouth, and Felicia gets on the phone.

Through his blurred vision, Valentin sees a woman come in. He says, Anna? but it’s Helena, who says, no, my son. Someone so much more important to you.

Outside Ace’s room, Curtis tells Spencer and Trina, remember the plan, and play it cool. They get the baby, then they get out. He tells Trina to watch the door, and asks if they’re ready. Let’s do it. He opens the door, and sees the weird nurse knitting next to Ace’s bassinette. She asks what they’re doing here. She wasn’t informed of a visit. Curtis says, step away from the baby. Do it now. She does, and Spencer takes Ace and leaves. Curtis looks at Trina, and she jets after them.

Brook tells Wiley that his mommy wasn’t feeling well, so daddy took her to the doctor. He asks who that lady is, and Brook says, that’s Aunt Tracy. She was at the wedding. She’s really nice. Tracy says, her little boy is Wiley’s Uncle Ned. Actually, he’s not so little, but when he was Wiley’s age, he really liked trains. She hears Wiley likes trains too. Brook says, and horses, and Tracy says she loves horses too. But she loves stories more. Brook says, Wiley loves stories too, and Tracy says she was just about to tell Brook a story. Does he want to help? Wiley sits by her, and she says, one of her favorites is The Miller’s Tale (from Canterbury Tales and not for children)… and there’s also the one about the little pigs. Wiley says, yeah, and she says, once upon a time, there were four little pigs… Wiley says, there were three little pigs, and Tracy guesses she’s bit rusty. Wiley asks when mommy is coming home, and Tracy says, when she’s had a chance to rest a while. Brook says, that’s right. Then she can come home to him and his baby sister. Tracy says, while they wait, she’s going to tell Wiley about that fourth pig he’s obviously forgotten about, and Wiley gets all excited.

Carly sees Michael at the hospital, and asks, how’s Willow? He says he can’t lose her, and she says, he won’t. He says he’s been trying to prepare himself, but he can’t do this. Carly says, he and Willow are going to get to the other side of this; she knows it. She hugs him.

Ava says, Drew went after Victor? and asks Nina, how did Drew find him? Nina says she doesn’t know all the details, but knows they tracked the Haunted Star to Greenland; that’s where Aunt Liesl and the others are. Ava asks if Portia knows. What about Laura? Nina says, Laura and Curtis went with Drew, and Sonny told her that Drew went specifically to bring Aunt Liesl home. Ava hopes he brings them all home, and Nina says, her too, but when Drew comes back… Ava says, there are going to be a couple of SEC agents waiting for him, huh? and Nina says, after putting everything on the line to save Willow, Drew’s going to come home to the SEC sifting through his business, and possible jail time. He could lose his company. His whole life that he built since he managed to escape from Victor, and it’s all because of her. Ava asks if Nina wants to know what she thinks, and Nina says she does. Ava says, people contain multitudes, and Nina says, meaning… Ava says, people are full of contradictions. Drew may be a hero, and may also deserve to go to prison. That ain’t Nina’s problem.

Victor says, the pathogen will be released on the world, and this suffering can finally come to an end. It’s quite merciful really. Laura says, that’s why he murdered Luke? So he could unleash his poison? Victor says, as much as he’d like to take credit, his brother Mikkos developed the pathogen several decades ago. It was only after Victor got the Ice Princess necklace that he was able to locate this facility. Drew says, decades ago? and Victor says, his brother was way ahead of his time. Laura says, his brother was a maniac, but to Drew’s point, what makes him think a pathogen created decades ago is still going to work? Victor says, now that is an excellent question. He thinks they’ll just have to see for themselves. Victor turns on a TV set, and they see Valentin shaking in the chair. He says, his son was administered the pathogen earlier this evening. Not so long ago, isn’t that right, Liesl? Obrecht nods, and Victor asks if they doubt the pathogen now.

Valentin says, Helena? and she says, yes, my son. Soon we will be together. He says, please, and she says, he thinks she’s the angel of mercy; that she’s here to save him from a painful, agonizing death. Does he believe she’s come to transport him to those fluffy clouds of heaven? Oh her poor, dear, twisted boy. She’s here to drag him down, down where he belongs… with her… for eternity.

Nina asks if Ava doesn’t think she’s being a little harsh, but Ava says, the fact is, despite what Drew is doing to save her daughter, he and Carly did break the law. Nina says, that’s right; they broke the law. It’s not like they’re perfect citizens either though. Ava says, doesn’t she know it, but what’s done is done. Nina can either let guilt paralyze her, or since Carly won’t be able to be there, be there for her daughter. The choice is hers.

A nurse brings lab results to TJ, and he asks her to thank the lab for rushing it. He and Elizabeth look at them, look at each other, then look at Willow.

Brook covers Wiley with a blanket, since he’s fallen asleep on the sofa. She thanks Tracy, and Tracy strokes Wiley’s hair, saying, sleep, little one.

TJ comes out, and Michael asks if he has any news. TJ says, yes.

Valentin tells Helena, go straight back to hell. He’s not going anywhere with her. She says, not yet, but soon. His father has all but sealed his fate. I have to say, she looks pretty good for being 110.

Felicia tells Hersley, open up. She has his supervisor on the phone. He opens the door, and she hands him the phone. She asks if Robert is all right, and takes the tape off his mouth. He says he knew she’d come through, but she says, he doesn’t understand. Frisco was replaced as director. She got through to him, and told him that Laura and the others were on the island, and Frisco refused to give the order to destroy the island, so the governing board replaced him on the spot. And the new director gave the order to destroy the island. He says, along with everyone on it.

Curtis tells Spencer and Trina, the seaplane is docked on the other side of the island. Do they think the two of them can make it there with the baby? Trina says, what about him? and he says he didn’t come alone and he’s not leaving without the rescue team. Spencer says, there’s a team? but Curtis says he doesn’t have time to explain. Take the baby and get out of here right now. He’ll be behind them as soon as he can, he promises. Spencer says, not until Curtis tells him who else is on this island, and Curtis says, Drew Cain, Valentin, and Laura.

Laura says, Victor is insane, and like any insane person, he says, on the contrary. He’s welcoming in the dawn of a new world. He looks at Valentin on the screen, and adds, where only the strong can survive. Laura says, are you sure about that? and holds up a vial full of red liquid, presumably what she stole off the table and presumably the pathogen.

My prediction? Curtis gets the hostages and his team off the island, and it blows up with Victor on it. Leaving the door open for his return one day. I’m also really hoping at some point he says, if it wasn’t for you meddling kids.

Tomorrow, Curtis needs to know he can trust Spencer; Robert says, tell him to abort the mission; Victor says, Laura drops it, they die; Michael tells Willow, it’s their last shot; and Sonny tells Nina, somebody messes with one of us, they mess with all of us.

Vanderpump Rules

The Toms, Ariana, Brock, Scheana, and Raquel go glamping at Cuyama Oaks Ranch for Raquel’s birthday. In Scheana’s interview, she says she’s not a camper. She’s never camped, and when she thinks of glamping, she thinks, air conditioning in nature. But if it’s what Raquel wants to do, she’s a team player. The manager leads them to two yurts; one with a king size bed, and the other with two queens. He tells them that everything is solar generated, and they decide to do boys and girls tents. Schwartz says he likes the idea of going to the bathroom anywhere; it’s liberating. They check out the animals there – pigs, chickens, turkeys, and goats – and smash pumpkins to feel to the pigs and goats. When Ariana tries to smash the final pumpkin, it just bounces around, and Brock says, that was anticlimactic.

James meets Lala at her Give Them Lala office, and she says, Katie and Kristina are going to help her with a shoot for the robes. She asks how he’s feeling, and he says, his nice beach day didn’t go to plan. Lala says, she doesn’t love the throwing of the drink, but just looking at Schwartz is so embarrassing, and don’t get her started about Sandoval. Lala tells him that Raquel slept at Sandoval’s while Ariana was out of town (🚩); Katie called her. In Lala’s interview, she says, let’s get this straight. Katie was at Villa Rosa tasting sandwiches with Lisa, while Ariana was at her grandmother’s funeral, when Ken drops the mother of all gossip bombs. We see a clip of Ken saying that he can’t believe Sandoval had Raquel over when Ariana was away, and in the jacuzzi (🚩). Katie asks if he’s spreading rumors, and asks how he knows. Lisa says, Raquel came in late and hung over… Lala says, the day before, Lisa was doing a tasting of the new SUR menu, when Raquel rolls up an hour and a half late. We see a clip of Raquel telling Lisa, sorry she’s late; she overslept. She’d stayed up late. She went back to Sandoval’s place, where they got in the jacuzzi with Schwartz (🚩). Lisa asks where she stayed, and Raquel says, at Sandoval’s… nothing happened (🚩), but Lisa says, it doesn’t matter. Just the fact that she was there… Raquel says, it was easier for her to sleep on the couch than try to get home. In Lala’s interview, she says, Lisa can sniff bullsh*t from a mile away, so of course, she calls Sandoval. Lisa calls Sandoval, and tells him that Raquel showed up an hour and a half late, looking like a bag of sh*t. Raquel said she’d gotten wasted, and ended up spending the night at his house (🚩). Sandoval says, they hung out, and Raquel dipped out early. Lisa asks if she spent the night at his house; yes or no. He says, yes, but like, dude, people crash at his house all the time, and Lisa says she’s not dude, and Raquel isn’t people. His wife was away, and she’s a beautiful single girl (🚩). Then Sandoval calls her dude again because he’s just that stupid. James tells Lala that he and Sandoval went to a members only weed smoking lounge. Sandoval told him that he, Schwartz, and Raquel were in the jacuzzi, but she left. We see a clip of Sandoval telling James that they had beers in the hot tub, then Raquel dipped out. James asks if she left, but Sandoval says, no she went to bed in his room… his guest room. I sh*t you not; that’s how he said it. (🚩 🚩 🚩)Lala says, Sandoval needs to take his degenerate ass elsewhere. On Labor Day, she was at a party, and Sandoval’s girlfriend was dealing with the death of her grandmother… We see Scheana’s vlog footage of a party, and in a voiceover, Lala says, the day Ariana’s grandmother died, Sandoval was at the barbecue. Ariana was furious when he said he wasn’t leaving, so he promised to go, but didn’t leave for another two hours (🚩). In Lala’s interview, she says, Sandoval and Raquel were dancing alone at The Abbey (🚩), he stayed at a party with Raquel all day long on Labor Day (🚩), and Raquel spending the night (🚩) leads her to only one logical conclusion. She thinks Sandoval has a thing for Raquel (🏆). James says, damn. Sandoval banging Raquel is just… Lala says, the last time Sandoval was talking about a woman the way he’s been talking about Raquel, was Ariana while he was with Kristen (🚩). We flash back to that, and Lala says, Sandoval and Ariana don’t focus on their relationship. James says, maybe distance works for them, but Lala says, no. Something ain’t right. She thinks something is going on, and she’s calling it like she sees it. (🚩)

Raquel says, cheers to be surrounded by good friends and good vibes. It’s what she wanted for her birthday. She toasts to them, and in Raquel’s interview, she says, these are her true core people; her forever friends. They look out for her and believe in her, and it means everything. How sick is everyone feeling at this point? Schwartz asks Ariana how it was going back home, and Ariana says, it was awful circumstances. It’s weird not to see her grandma. She was funny and sassy and Ariana misses her. She kept thinking she wished she could talk to her. She starts to cry, and Brock says, she can. Her grandma is here with her, and in Ariana’s interview, she says, it’s been a hard year, losing Charlotte, and now losing her grandma. She’s not well. She’s barely hanging on. She asks if anything happened when she was out of town, and Raquel says, there was a food tasting at SUR, and she was an hour and 30 minutes late. Schwartz says, and Lisa said she looked like a bag of sh*t. Raquel says, she and Schwartz took a car to Sandoval’s, they hung out and had drinks. She stayed the night, but she slept on the couch (🚩). Brock says, Sandoval lied; he said she hadn’t spent the night (🚩). In his interview, Sandoval says, it was on the heels of the open relationship rumor, and Schwartz making out with Raquel. He thought it would be better if everyone didn’t know that detail. He was going to tell Ariana, but he should have just told truth… like, stupid. (🚩)

Lala gets ready for the photo shoot at what looks like a swanky townhouse, and gives Kristina and Katie bathrobes. In her interview, she says she’s so proud of Give Them Lala. She relies on it to support her daughter. If her kid wants to go to college one day, that’s what’s going to send her. It’s just about bitches supporting bitches. She’s proud of all of her friends right now. Kristina asks what The Don and Satchel thought about beach day, and Katie says, Satchel doesn’t understand why everyone is so mean to her. Kristina says, it’s disgusting, and Katie says, Sandoval told her that she takes no accountability for the relationship fail. We flash back to that, and Sandoval saying she shouldn’t be with someone for who she wants them to be, but who they are. Katie says, Sandoval claimed she was spreading a rumor about him and Ariana having an open relationship, but Lala says, it’s not that farfetched. She hooked up with Ariana in Tom’s car, and thinks he would have participated if they’d been in a bedroom (🚩). I don’t know whether to be grossed out, or think, I guess Sandoval’s adventurous, but not that adventurous. Kristina asks if Ariana cares, and Katie says, she doesn’t care to question, but cares if people talk about it. In Lala’s interview, she says, something don’t smell right with Raquel and Sandoval’s friendship (🚩). If you have a dude who’s your best friend and been there during difficult times, add alcohol, and you end up sitting on their face. Kristina says she’s doing a Heartspring party in the back garden at TomTom to showcase her skincare products, and Katie says she wants to bring her mom. She’s here to help with the sandwich stuff. Kristina says she loves doing the shoot and hearing about the sandwich stuff; they’re supporting women.

Ariana and Scheana sit in one of the yurts, and Ariana says she hasn’t seen Scheana since the wedding. Schwartz told her about beach day, and how James and Schwartz were fighting. Scheana says, James was like, how dare you bring up the engagement? They ended up going to a bar, and Sandoval confronted Katie about the rumor; Ally had insinuated Katie said Sandoval and Ariana had an open relationship. Ariana says she’s not knocking people who do, but they don’t. Katie had texted her something that day, saying she was sorry, and she wasn’t spreading rumors. Ariana wants to believe her, but doesn’t believe her. In Ariana’s interview, she says she gets that Katie hates Raquel, but Raquel is her friend. She’s been kind, sweet, loyal and a delight since the day they met. 😐

Dinner is a buffet, and Raquel knocks the tub of ranch off the table. She tells Sandoval that he has something on his face (🚩), then says she bit her lip. Schwartz says, that will exacerbate her taste for blood, and tells Brock and Sandoval to be careful. Her type is men who are taken (🚩). Ariana asks what Raquel’s peach and pit were of 27, and Raquel says, breaking up with James was difficult, but she had the balls to do it, so it was both. She also met them through the relationship, but they created their own friendships. It’s super special and she appreciates each and every one of them. Sandoval raves about how proud he is of her for showing more confidence and being badass. Everyone is like, yay! and Raquel says, cheers to 28. Ariana gets a text from Kristina inviting her to the party at TomTom for her skincare brand, and Scheana says, Kristina texted that she, Brock, and Summer should come. Raquel says she wasn’t invited, and Schwartz says, she can be his date. Ariana says, someone’s being bold, and Raquel says, it can be a friend date. She needs to get her sh*t together because her parents are pressuring her about what she’s going to do with her life. Ariana asks about the pageant circuit, but Raquel says she’s aged out. Her big dream was to be Miss California, and be a role model and motivation for young girls. Pageants made every aspect of her life consistent, and now she’s f***ed up. In Raquel’s interview, she says, she’s always been the good girl, and now she’s aged out, so she doesn’t have to worry about her reputation. She’s making up for lost time (🚩). Ariana sits with Raquel, and says, getting through the breakup so well made her more of a role model because of her behavior. Raquel cries on Ariana’s shoulder, and I’m so disgusted. In her interview, Raquel says, the creepy thing about it was the pageant deciding her career path. She told them she was going to be an occupational therapist when she first competed. She thinks her entire life’s plan was mapped out at a young age, and it scares her. She cries, and I feel less than nothing. Sandoval gives Raquel a pair of vintage Versace 1990 sunglasses, and Schwartz says he didn’t get her anything. She says he could give her a kiss, and Schwartz says, to them, it’s lighthearted banter. He feels vilified, but maybe Raquel shouldn’t come. He and Katie are at war. Ariana says she thinks Katie’s mindset is that he’s rubbing her face in it, and Schwartz says he thinks Raquel going with him would add more fuel to the imaginary fire. Sandoval says, tell them to f*** off, and in his interview, he says, Katie is mad, so you can’t come. You said something Katie doesn’t like, so call in sick to Sur. It’s so entitled. Scheana texts Kristina, asking if Raquel can come to the event, and Kristina texts back that Raquel can come. Everyone is all happy… for now.

They have a glamping disco, and Ariana says, Raquel deserves a good birthday. In the morning, everyone heads back to the city. Katie’s mom Teri says she’s excited about the shop. Katie worked for her for so many years; now she’ll be working for Katie. James asks how Ally is feeling after beach day, and she says, James was fighting with everyone. He says he didn’t mean to embarrass her, but she says he embarrassed himself. Obviously, he’s angry. James says, there was no anger behind what did. He’d be fine if Schwartz and Raquel were just dating openly. Ally says he’s confusing, and in James’s interview, he says, all Sandoval can think about is Schwartz. Now that he has his boy back, James is on the outside.

It’s time for Kristina’s Heartspring party, and she tells some of her guests that she started with three lip balms. She was working at SUR at night, and Heartspring during the day. In Schwartz’s interview, he says, Katie is giving him the coldest cold shoulder ever. In his world, they would have sat him down, called him a dirty little slut, and had a few laughs. He guesses he’s staying in the doghouse for now. Lala asks Katie if she thinks she and Schwartz will ever get in a place where it’s all good, but they keep their distance, and Katie says, when he apologizes. Raquel comes in with Ariana and Sandoval, and in Lala’s interview, she says, now Raquel is showing up with Ariana and Sandoval. Maybe they’re a throuple. She feels like she took a hit of acid. She tells Katie that she used to see Raquel as a sweet soul, but now when they’re in the same room, she’s like a very stupid demon.

Ariana sits down with Katie, and says she wants to nip the whole thing with James and Ally in the bud. Katie tells her that James was at Lala’s and said, the other night, he and Ally went to The Abbey, when Sandoval showed up with Raquel (🚩). They all thought it was so weird that it was just the two of them, and she said Ariana and Tom’s dynamic was unconventional to some people. Ariana says, what was repeated to her was that Katie said they had no rules, except for not embarrassing the other one, but Katie tells her that she didn’t say that. Ariana wonders, why twist her words? and Katie says she has no idea. Ariana says she’s excited about what they’re about to get into, and if disparaging stuff was said about her, she’d hoped it didn’t come from Katie. Raquel is one of her closest friends. She trusts and loves Raquel as well as Sandoval. She understands how Katie feels, but she’s not going to say she doesn’t know Raquel. Katie says she hopes she’s a good friend. It’s a personality thing, a character thing, and integrity thing. It’s hard to believe Raquel is a sh*tty person to some people, and a good friend to others (🚩). Ariana says, if she was in Katie’s shoes, she’d feel the same, but doesn’t want to get dragged in to their beef. Katie apologizes, and tells Ariana not to take it as sh*t talking. She didn’t feel it was, and didn’t mean for it to come across like Ariana and Sandoval were in an open situation. Ariana says she’s glad they talked because things get built up. She trusts Katie as a friend and business partner, and hopes they grow closer. They hug it out.

James sits with Raquel, and asks, what’s up? Raquel says, if she’s being honest, when they were at the beach, she felt hurt by James’s comments that he regretted Rachella. She gets that it didn’t turn out like he wanted, but he shouldn’t have regrets. James says, they also need to grow up at some point, and realize past mistakes, and Raquel says she knows he says things to make her feel a certain way and to hurt her; he knew it would hurt her. She doesn’t regret their relationship. He says he has a lot of regret, and she tells him, don’t. In James’s interview, he says, now he sees Raquel was completely wrong for him. Of course he regrets Rachella. It was an epic proposal wasted on her. Raquel says she’s grown a lot, and James says he doesn’t know her anymore. She says, fair enough, and James says, she’s happy where she’s at. She’s grown and done exploration; some of which made her happy, and some not. It’s part of life. She says, that’s why she doesn’t regret anything.

Lala scoops up some Heartspring products, and tells Ariana that she loves free sh*t. Ariana says, this summer is trying to do her in, and Lala says, it kicked Ariana’s ass. Ariana wonders how she hasn’t faked her own death. She doesn’t know how she keeps going. Lala says, she’s getting a business off the ground, and dealing with grief, and she wants to make sure Ariana is good. She was at a barbecue, and Sandoval was there. He’d said Ariana was mad at him. Ariana says, Sandoval couldn’t get a ride because Jason left, but Lala says, Sandoval knew he was leaving and wanted to stay (🚩). Sandoval makes the unfortunate choice to join them, and Ariana says, Lala told her that he knew Jason was leaving the party, and he said he wanted to stay. Sandoval insists he told Jason he was dipping out – Sandoval’s phrase of the day – but Ariana says, he chose to stay. Her grandma died while he was there, and he knew Jason was leaving, but he stayed. Changing tactics, Sandoval says he figured she wanted to be alone (🚩). Ariana says she asked him to come, and he told her that he couldn’t because he couldn’t find a ride. In Ariana’s interview, she says, when her dad passed away, she and Sandoval weren’t even together, and it was a huge priority for him to drop everything to be there for her. They’ve been together eight and a half years, and she feels like he doesn’t think she’s as important anymore (🚩). Lala asks why he didn’t ride with Jason, and Ariana says, Lala wants to know she’s fine with how things transpired. Lala tells her, it’s okay to say she wanted Sandoval with her, and Sandoval says he couldn’t get a car that day. Lala says she was right there, and Ariana says, Sandoval told her that he didn’t know Jason left because he was taking a sh*t (🚩). He’s put her in the position where people think she’s an idiot. Lala says, that’s what she thinks, and that’s what she saw (🚩). In her interview, Ariana says, she chooses Sandoval over everyone. She’s ride or die with him, and looks like an idiot when she’s his number one stan, and he’s not hers. (🚩 🚩 🚩)

Next time, a tasting for Something About Her; Sandoval feels like his very presence annoys Ariana; Raquel tells Katie that her making out with Schwartz is none of Katie’s business; and Katie tells Schwartz that she’s done. She doesn’t need an apology.

🍸Pump That Tini…

Stop by tomorrow for soap, a spot of tea, and some Met Gala talk. Until then, stay safe, stay being the person your dog thinks you are, and stay being leery of those who are a sh*tty person to some people, and a good friend to others.

May 2, 2023 – Valentin Becomes Victor’s Test Subject, Teresa Manages To Leave Out Melissa Even More Than She Has & Some Kyu

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Valentin says, Victor should know by now that he’s a match for him, and Victor says, Valentin’s self-confidence is so misplaced. Valentin asks if Victor doesn’t want to know why he’s here, and Victor says he can think of two possible explanations. Either Valentin launched an ill-advised rescue attempt, or it’s out of pure revenge. Now tell him, which is it? Valentin says, can’t it be both?

Michael tells Willow that Amelia is asleep like the baby she is, and Wiley’s asleep, but apparently had a wrestling match with his covers. He tucked Wiley back in though, and he didn’t budge. She says, ring bearing is hard work, and he says, but Wiley did great, didn’t he? She says, the whole wedding was great; perfect in fact. He says, there was one major tradition they left out, and she says, what’s that? He tells her to hold the bouquet and he’ll show her. Is he going to make her toss it to him?

In her dorm room, Josslyn looks at a photo of Trina, and flashes back to Trina saying, it’s not just the way Spencer spoke to Dex; Spencer seemed to go out of his way to pick a fight. Josslyn says, he’s just being an entitled jerk, and Trina says, but he wanted to do better. She really believes that. Spencer was lashing out, and Dex was the nearest target. Something’s going on with him. Josslyn asks, like what? and Trina says she’s not sure, but she’s going to find out tonight. There’s a knock at the door, and Josslyn opens it to Dex. They hug.

In her office, Portia looks at the photo of her and Trina from the wedding. She flashes back to Trina saying, Portia kept this huge secret from her all of her life. Portia says she’s sorry, but she and Trina’s father love her. And every decision she made from the second she found out she was pregnant has been about Trina. Trina tells her, just don’t. How can Portia stand there and say she loves her, when she kept this from her for her entire life? There’s a knock at the door, and Portia says, come in. Marshall says he thought she could use a friend.

Some of Victor’s goons drag Trina and Spencer into the main salon of the Haunted Star, and Spencer says, I’m sick of being drug around by you no-necks. Goon1 says he’s sick of hearing Spencer’s voice, and Good2 tells him to quite messing around and take the prisoner to his room, and leaves with Trina. Goon1 says, Spencer heard the man, but Spencer stomps on his foot, and breaks free. He tries to run after Trina, but Goon3 grabs him, and Goon1 says, he’ll pay for that.

Michael carries Willow over the threshold and says, welcome home, Mrs. Corinthos. She says, it’s good to be home, Mr. Corinthos. He takes her bouquet from her, and says he’ll put these in water, but she says, he forgot something, and kisses him.

Dex asks if Josslyn is okay, and she says, it’s been a long, long day. Some of it was awesome, and some of it was not. He says, she looks beautiful, and she says she’s trying to find the energy to take her hair down. He says, allow him, and I say out loud, right. He takes the remaining pins out of her hair, and tells her, like he said, beautiful. She kisses him.

Victor says, whatever the reasons, he’s afraid Valentin has come all this way for nothing. He’s in Victor’s custody, and Victor’s men will soon hunt down his accomplices. Valentin says, Victor’s wasting his time; he came alone. Victor says he would have expected Valentin to be a better liar, and Valentin says he fooled Victor into thinking he was dead (ha-ha – good one), but Victor says he won’t let Valentin play him again. Make it easy on himself, just tell him who the accomplice is, and how Valentin found him. Valentin asks why he’d answer when Victor will just accuse him of lying, and Victor says, lies come easily. The truth often has to be coerced.

On the phone with Diane, Robert says he’s sorry they got interrupted earlier. He has a bit of time now if she wants to talk… Now in Anna’s bed, Scotty snores LOUDLY, and Robert says he’ll call her back. He tells Scotty, wake up, and wonders, how long does chloroform last? Elizabeth knocks at the door, and asks if Anna is decent. She’s coming in.

Spencer tells Goon1, sorry about his foot, and Goon1 says, not as sorry as he’s going to be. Spencer says, if Goon1 can forgive and forget, he promises to ask for leniency at his trial, because he will get caught. It is only a matter of time. Goon1 says, can you believe this guy? Let’s show him how we forgive and forget. He takes off his jacket, and I think, Victor is such a micromanager, shouldn’t they check with him first before beating the crap out of his nephew? Spencer says, his uncle wants to use him and his girlfriend for his psycho medical experiment. He was just protecting her. Doesn’t Goon1 have anyone he wants to protect? Goon1 says, no, since no one would be close to a jerk like him, and draws his fist back. Curtis stands in the doorway, and says, I wouldn’t do that if I were you.

Victor says, fortunately, he doesn’t require Valentin’s cooperation. His mere presence is enough. Obrecht asks if Valentin has news about Willow. How is she? Valentin says, as far as he knows, Willow is still alive. Can the same be said of Victor’s hostages? Victor says his great nephews are fine, thank you, as is the stowaway, Trina Robinson. But none of them will survive what is to come unless Obrecht gets on with the testing. Obrecht goes back to her microscope, and Valentin says, what testing? Victor says he’s so glad Valentin asked. Liesl is testing the final step in his plan to save the world, and Valentin’s here to help.

Elizabeth is about to go into Anna’s room, when Robert opens the door. He comes out, closing it behind him, and says he was just visiting Anna. Elizabeth says she just needs to take Anna’s vitals, but he says, she’s sleeping at the moment. Elizabeth says she’ll do her best not to wake Anna up, but Robert says he can’t let her do that.

Marshall says he was worried about Trina, and figured Portia was too. It might help them both if they worry together. She thanks him, and says, ever since Trina called her… He says, Trina called her? and she asks if Curtis didn’t fill him in on everything. He says, that’s great. He hasn’t spoken to Curtis. He’s been leaving messages, but he thought Curtis must be off hounding the PCPD about finding Trina, and was too preoccupied to talk to his old man. That’s good. She says, he doesn’t know. Curtis and Drew Cain uncovered a lead and left to bring Trina home… if they can get past Victor Cassadine. Marshalls says, ugh.

Curtis tells the Goons, the boss doesn’t take kindly to those harming his family, and Goon1 says, this one tried to escape. He needs to be taught a lesson. Spencer says he just wanted to check on Trina. Her room is down the hallway near the engine room, which gives it a lot of fumes. He just wanted to make sure she’s okay. Goon1 says, Spencer doesn’t give requests, and Curtis suggests Goon1 take a break. He’ll take care of this guy. Goon1 says, Curtis isn’t assigned to this detail. Stick to his orders if he knows what’s good for him. As a matter of fact, he doesn’t think he’s ever seen Curtis before. Curtis says he doesn’t think he’s ever seen Goon1 before either. There’s a lot of guards here. Goon1 says, still… and Spencer laughs. He says, his uncle must have been scraping the bottom of the barrel for them. He must have been very, very desperate, to hire the entire brainless brigade. Goon1 asks if Spencer has a death wish, but Spencer says, all he cares about is Trina, glancing at Curtis. Curtis says, don’t harm the boss’s family if you know what’s good for you, and leaves. As soon as he’s gone, Goon1 punches Spencer in the stomach.

Michael brings out the bouquet, now in a vase, and asks how Willow is feeling. She says, blissfully happy to be able to call him her husband, and mean it this time. It’s a dream come true. He says he wants to spend his life making her dreams come true, and she says, all she wants is him. He says he’s sorry there was no dancing at the reception. Actually, there was no reception, thanks to Ned. She says, at least the SEC didn’t show up until after the ceremony, and he says, and they didn’t keep his mom overnight. Since they don’t know where Drew is, they just have to wait for him to come back with Obrecht. She says, Sonny gets some credit for that. If he hadn’t led the SEC to believe Drew was in Maui, things might be very different. She takes his hand, and says, ever since she was diagnosed with leukemia, the world keeps falling out from under her. Her one constant has been him, their children, and his family. They’ve never stopped supporting her and loving her. And if the worst happens – he protests, but she keeps going – she hates the thought of the family being divided between him and his father.

Dex asks if Josslyn is asleep, and she says, dreaming. He says, good dreams he hopes, and she says, very good, kissing him. He says, she told him it was a long day. Tell him about the wonderful parts. She says, that would be the wedding. Everyone was so happy for Michael and Willow. Everyone made an effort, even Tracy. He asks, who’s Tracy? and she says, Tracy Quartermaine, Michael’s great aunt, his grandpa’s sister. She makes the Wicked Witch of the West seem lowkey and agreeable. He asks if she isn’t being a little harsh, and she says, he can meet Tracy and tell her if she’s wrong. But even she got in the spirit of things. She saw Kristina. They don’t really talk anymore. She’s loyal to her dad; she doesn’t want to admit he’s done anything wrong. But after that little bit of tension, it was like a big, extended family – the Spencers, the Corinthos, the Quartermaines, various Falconaris, McCalls, Davises. They were all able to just put the grudges aside and enjoy the night. He asks if the bride and groom were able to relax and enjoy their wedding, and she says, Michael and Willow were blissful. People overuse that word, on ice cream and manicures, but tonight she saw true bliss. They looked at each other like they were the only two people on the planet. They were so grateful, so in love, so happy to have that moment. That was bliss.

Valentin says, Victor really is depraved. He looks at Obrecht, and says, Victor’s delusional, right? Tell him this is a fantasy with no chance of being realized. She says, he is delusional. However, the pathogen is all too real… and effective. Victor asks if Valentin realizes that man is responsible for 80% of the crises in our world, and just happens to have a mortality rate of 80%. Kind of perfect, doesn’t he think? Once man and nature are back in balance, our beautiful planet can flourish once again. He’d hoped to have Valentin by his side, but after Valentin’s betrayal, he’s had to reevaluate his priorities. Valentin says, what exactly is on his worth being saved list? and Victor says, once Liesl has proved the effectiveness of the antidote, Nikolas’s infant son Ace – he really must get around to renaming him one day – and himself, and he promised Liesl she could take some of the antidote home to her family, and his trusted employees of course (🍷). He’s afraid everyone else’s fate will come down to a roll of the dice. Valentin says, what if the cure isn’t effective? What does it come down to then? It’s not too late. Victor can end this madness. And he can have something so much better than all this death. He can have his son back.

Elizabeth says, Robert won’t let her monitor a patient? and Robert says, Anna’s exhausted and tired. He figured that was more important than having her vitals checked again. She says, actually, it’s not. If Anna is that tired, they need to make sure there’s not a medical reason for it. He asks if it’s possible for her to come back later, but she says, it doesn’t work like that. And if Robert was genuinely concerned about Anna, he’d be pushing the call button, and not trying to stonewall her.

Outside Trina’s room, Curtis tells Goon2, change of plans. Watkins wants him on patrol. Goon2 asks why Watkins isn’t telling him. Who are you?

Trina paces in her room, and hears punches being thrown. Curtis opens the door, and she runs to him, hugging him hard.

Dex tells Josslyn, so the wedding was perfect. What about the reception? Anyone get hammered and do something they’ll regret? Anybody pick a fight with the Wicked Witch of the West? She says she wishes. There wasn’t a reception. Two agents from the SEC came in and took her mom for questioning. They’re accusing her mom and Drew of insider trading. He asks how that’s even possible, and she says, her mom bought shares from Aurora, Drew’s company, right before they were supposed to merge with ELQ, but thanks to Ned Quartermaine, the merger never happened, and her mom lost a ton of money. She had to sell her half of the hotel; Nina bought it. She guesses her mom was getting inside information from Drew. He asks if the SEC questioned Drew, but she says, no. Drew is off trying to save Willow, but when he comes back – if he comes back – he’s going to be in serious trouble. He asks how Drew managed to avoid the SEC, and she says, Sonny.

Willow says she loves that they had a family wedding, even if the family was all Michael’s, and he asks if she hasn’t been paying attention. It’s her family now too. She says, of everyone who was there tonight, how many love him? and he says, besides Ned and Tracy? Everyone… including Ned and Tracy. She asks, how many love Sonny? and he says, most of them. She says, how much overlap? How many love him and Sonny both? He says, aside from again Ned and Tracy, everyone. She says, the rift between him and Sonny effects them all. Because even if he’s right – and he is right and Sonny’s wrong, and she’s pretty sure they all know that, including Kristina – they still love them both. They don’t want to choose. So for their sakes, can’t he find a way to co-exist with his father? He says, there’s something she doesn’t know; something he can’t keep from her anymore. It’s better if he shows her. He takes out his phone.

Willow asks, what did she just see? and he says, his father accepting a delivery from a private military contractor. Sonny made a deal with these people to illegally traffic weapons through Port Charles. Those are Federal crimes; violations of the National Security Act. This footage will send his father to prison for the rest of his life.

Josslyn says, Sonny made them think Drew left for Maui, and Dex says, that’s good news, right? She says, yes and no. Drew is free to help Willow without the SEC getting in his way, but getting help from Sonny complicates things. He says, plus he’s working with her brother to take Sonny down, but Josslyn says she prefers calling it bringing him to justice. He chose to break the law, and he’s ruined lives doing that. He has to suffer the consequences… but then he sticks up for them like he used to do, and it reminds her that he’s just full of contradictions. Hmm… So is she. It’s okay if Sonny doesn’t suffer consequences as long as he sticks up for them all the time? Dex says, Sonny does have impeccable timing. He got it tonight; the evidence that Sonny is accepting shipments from Pikeman. She asks, what happens now? and he says, that’s up to Michael. He gave it to Michael, so he guesses Michael will turn it over to the authorities. She says, and this will all be over? and he says, that’s the hope.

Elizabeth says she’s trying to take care of Anna, and Robert says he is too. She says, then step aside and let her in, but he says he can’t. She asks if she’s going to have to call security… on Robert Scorpio? He says, there’s something going on. He can’t give her any details. It’s entirely confidential. She has to trust him on this.

Scotty comes to, holding his head, and says, too many martinis. He realizes he’s in Anna’s bed, and sits up, checking his pockets. He grabs the bedside phone, dials, and says, operator. He sees the phone has been unplugged. Maybe they should have taken it out of the room.

Portia says, there’s been no word from Curtis or Drew since they went to find the Haunted Star, and Marshall says he’s sorry. It’s hard enough worrying about Trina, but now to have his brave, but reckless son off on some foolhardy mission to take down some dangerous lunatic. What was he thinking? She says she’s grateful to Curtis for trying to find Trina and bring her home. He’s saved Trina’s life more than once, and she trusts he’ll be able to do it again… but she’s terrified too. Marshall says, him too. Curtis loves his family above all else. Ain’t nothin’ gonna stop him. Nothin’. Especially to rescue a girl who might be his daughter.

Curtis puts the out cold guard next to Trina’s bed, and zip ties his wrists. He says, he should be out for a while, and she says she can’t believe he’s really here. He says, he can’t believe she’s wearing that sweater there’s no way he wasn’t going to come for her, and she asks if her mom knows he’s here. He says he left her a note. No surprise, she’s worried about Trina. Trina says she’s sorry for all of this. She wishes she could tell her mom herself. He says, she will, because he’s going to get her out of here, and she says, how? Victor has guards all over this place. He says, remember, he has help. They’re going to get her, Spencer, and the baby safely out of here and home. She says she hasn’t seen Spencer’s brother in like, forever; a nanny’s with him. And Spencer is having a lot of friction with the guards. One in particular really hates him. He says he just saw Spencer, and she asks if he’s okay. Curtis says, actually, Spencer was more worried about her than his own safety. He checks his gun, and she asks if Spencer is in trouble. He says, right now, he’s going to get her off this boat and come back for Spencer, and she says she’ll help him get Spencer, but he says he can’t put her at risk like that. She says, Spencer has helped her this entire time. She’s not leaving him. He tells her to do exactly as he says. He says, run, she runs like hell, okay? She promises, and he says, let’s go get Spencer. He aims his gun in front of him, and they slip out.

Victor says, what’s the incentive of getting his son back? He’s already got Valentin. Valentin says, he’s Victor’s captive. Call it off. Let Liesl, Spencer, Trina, and the baby go home. They can work together to set the world to rights. Pour money into scientific research; hire the most brilliant minds. Just think of everything they could achieve together, with no lives lost. You and me; father and son. Victor says, the only way to save this planet is through drastic measures. As for his son, he was foolish enough to trust him once. He won’t be foolish enough to make that mistake again. Valentin says, all right, then let Spencer, Trina, and the baby go. He’ll stay as Victor’s subject. Think of everything they can do with no innocent lives lost. Victor says, no one is innocent. They’re all responsible for the mess this planet’s in, but Valentin can save himself. Just give Victor the answers. He knows Valentin didn’t come here alone; there are others. Who are they and how many? Valentin says he came alone, and Victor asks if it troubles Valentin to be so predictable. Valentin asks if it troubles Victor to be so predictable, and Victor says, this is what’s going to happen. Liesl is going to infect Valentin with the pathogen. They’re pressed for time, so she’s going to deliver it through an injection. The onset of symptoms should be almost instantaneous. Then it just comes down to a waiting game. If Valentin gives him the answers he needs, they’ll give him the antidote, which they’re reasonably certain will be effective. If, however, he dies, they’ll know they have more work to do. Fortunately, they have Trina and Spencer as back-ups. If Valentin doesn’t give him the answers, or takes too much time, then they’ll just test the antidote on them. Goon3 takes Valentin out of the room, and Victor tells Obrecht, let’s go make history.

Michael tells Willow, this wasn’t staged; this wasn’t entrapment. Sonny is helping them smuggle arms out of the country. Willow asks why he would do that, and Michael says, money; they’re paying him a fortune. She says, Sonny’s wealthy already. How much money does he need? Michael thinks it’s more than just money. Port Charles is Sonny’s territory; he decides who moves through it. To deal with  a major defense contractor like Pikeman gives him power, leverage. They want to move their merchandise out of the country, Sonny makes that happen. They don’t just owe him money, they owe him favors. Maybe they have the leverage of politicians, someone who could be useful to Sonny. This is his father’s business. This is what they don’t talk about. It’s what makes them targets; what gets people killed. She asks how he even has that video, and he says, someone sent it to him. She says, that doesn’t make any sense. Someone obtained evidence of Sonny breaking the law. Why wouldn’t they take it to the police themselves? He says, because that someone works for him.

Josslyn says, Dex will be out from under Sonny’s thumb. He won’t have to be looking over his shoulder all the time. And they won’t have to worry that Sonny will find out Dex is working against him. He says, they can move on with their lives, and she says, and Sonny will spend the rest of his life behind bars? What if Dex goes down with Sonny? He was involved in the Pikeman deal. He says, Michael might not even have to use his name, and she says, if he does? Dex says he should be able to cut a deal since he was the one to turn the evidence over. She asks if there’s any way Sonny gets out of this, but he says he doesn’t see how. He’ll be facing the full weight of the Federal government. Does she want Sonny to get away with it?

Elizabeth says she does trust Robert, but she also has to do her job. If her supervisor sees she hasn’t filled in Anna’s vitals, she’s going to start asking questions. Robert asks if she can maybe tell her supervisor that it’s a family emergency. That her… goldfish died? Just buy him a bit of time. Please. He’s begging her.

Scotty asks if the operator can connect him to the WSB. It’s a matter of life and death.

Goon3 asks if Goon1 thinks Spencer has had enough, but Goon1 says he guesses not. Trina runs out and says, hey. Leave him alone. Goon1 says, what are you gonna do about it, sweetheart? Well, that remark should be enough to give her the strength of ten.

Two guards strap Valentin to a chair, while Victor watches through the window. It’s amazing how clean everything is after forty years underground. It’s got electricity, it’s spic-and-span, but everyone is wearing coats, so apparently, they couldn’t get the heat going. Obrecht joins Victor, and asks if he’s sure he wants to do this. He could be signing his son’s death warrant. He says, Valentin made his choice. Just go. She goes inside, and takes a syringe out of a case. She looks at Victor, and says, it’s his son, but Victor says, not anymore. Obrecht injects Valentin. She says she’s sorry, and he says he knows. She goes back out, and tells Victor, this is insanity. She makes a disgusted noise and starts to leave, but Victor grabs her arm. He says, if she wants to save her great niece, she’ll see this experiment through. A guard grabs her and points her toward the window, which is kind of stupid, but okay, and Victor asks how Valentin is feeling. Valentin asks, how long until he’s dead? Victor put a lot of work into this. It would be a shame if it amounted to nothing. Victor says he thinks Valentin needs a tissue, and Valentin begins to bleed from his nose.

Elizabeth says she’ll delay taking Anna’s vitals, and Robert thanks her. She says, he has 30 minutes, and he says he’ll take it. He wants to get it sorted out as soon as possible. A man approaches, and says, Agent Hersley from the WSB. He shows Robert his badge, and says he needs to get into the room right away. Robert says, on what business? and Hersley says, it’s confidential. He goes past Robert, and into Anna’s room. Scotty says he’s got to talk to the agent, and Elizabeth says, where’s Anna? Scotty says, Scorpio drugged him because he doesn’t want him talking to the WSB agent about Victor’s biological weapon. Elizabeth asks if that’s true, and Robert says, you idiot. Does Scotty realize what he’s just done? He’s killed the woman he purported to love, along with three hostages. They should have just acted like Scotty escaped from the psyche ward and has these delusions all the time.

Michael tells Willow, his father’s lieutenant Dex Heller doesn’t work for his father; Dex works for him. He saw an opportunity to get inside his father’s organization to gather evidence to pass along to law enforcement. Dex found it. As soon as he gives this to the Justice Department, Sonny will be out of their lives for good. She says, what about the rest of his family? His brothers, and sisters? She starts to cry, and Michael says, they’ll be safe. He didn’t want to tell her any of this. He didn’t want her to worry. She hyperventilates and passes out. Luckily onto the sofa. He flies to her, calling her name.

Josslyn tells Dex that Avery and Donna are going to be devastated when Sonny goes to prison. So will Kristina. He says he’s so sorry. The last thing he wants is to hurt her family. She says, he didn’t; Sonny did. He just never thought he’d get caught, and now he has.

Portia tells Marshall, up until the Nurses Ball, all she could think about was how she messed things up with Curtis and Trina. She wasn’t even sure she could repair either relationship, but that seems like a lifetime ago. He says, she’s been through a lot, and she says, it feels like one disaster has been put on hold for another one, but Curtis was really there for her when she found out Trina was missing. When Trina called from the Haunted Star, she told Portia that she loved her. She starts to cry, and says, she thought she was never going to hear those words from Trina again. Marshall hands her a hanky, soaps and Dr. Phil being the only place you see them anymore, and he says, of course (🍷) Trina loves her. And Trina will forgive her, just like Curtis forgave him. Portia tells him that she doesn’t even care if Trina ever says one word to her again. She just wants Trina home safe, and Curtis too. She would give anything for that to happen, but she’s stuck here, and can’t do anything to help her daughter. He says he’s here for her, however long it takes. He holds her against himself, and says, it’s going to be all right.

Goon3 takes off after Trina, but Curtis intercepts him, knocking the gun out of his hand, and kicking his ass all over the place. Goon1 runs up, and he and Curtis struggle.

Tomorrow, Brook asks why Tracy thinks she can still hold something over her head; Ava says, Nina better hope Sonny doesn’t find out it was her who snitched; Michael calls 9-1-1; and Trina tries to wake up Spencer.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey

What the hell? Everyone is magically delicious home. At least Ireland is now free of New Jersey. Danielle’s mother Angel comes over, and the grandkids go nuts. Nate tells the kids, if they don’t behave, mom and dad will take their candy away, and watch them cry as they eat it in front of them. That actually sounds like something my father would have said. In Danielle’s interview, she says, she talks about everything with her mom. When she was in high school, they would argue and fight, but her mom is her best friend. What she loves most is that her mom doesn’t beat around the bush. She says what she feels, and doesn’t give a sh*t. Danielle says she had a hard time in Ireland, and Angel asks if she needs to kick someone’s ass. In her interview, Danielle says, during the ride home, she was holding on by a thread. She wanted nothing to do with anyone. Angel asks if they were mean to her, and Danielle says, they were mean girls times a million. Rachel wouldn’t let go of Danielle having called her a rat, and Angel says, she’s not ride or die. Danielle says, then Marge was attacking her. There’s a rumor she’s holding that came from Marge’s friend. A mutual friend saw Melissa in the back seat of a car with a guy, and they were kissing. She doesn’t know if it’s true, but it’s what Marge’s friend said. In her interview, she says she was like Muhammad Ali, blocking sh*t left and right. She had no time to think about what to do about what she was told. Angel says, she should tell Melissa. If she were Melissa, she’d want to know.

Rachel and John go see an adoption attorney, and in Rachel’s interview, she says, there’s always been something missing for her in not adopting Jaiden. Jaiden thought he’d been automatically adopted when she and John got married, and didn’t understand. She wanted it to feel like a complete family for him. He’s so good with the girls, and she wants to take the last step to solidify her being his legal guardian. She tells the attorney that Jaiden will be 16 soon, and although he had a mom, she wasn’t around. It was a lot for him to process, and she’s wanted to adopt him for a long time, but she was scared of the outcome. The attorney tells them that there’s an obligation to serve or try to serve the mother as part of the process. It not only makes Rachel a legal parent, but terminates the biological mother’s legal rights. If she objects, she has the right to an appointed attorney, and they’ll have a contested adoption. Rachel says, it’s crazy. Jaiden’s mother has never been a parental figure in his life, but she still has to ask if it’s okay to adopt the son she raised. In her interview, Rachel says she can’t imagine having no regard for her children. It’s frustrating. She knows who Jaiden is and his heart, and she wants to fill that void. She cries, and says she wants to solidify that she’s here for him and he’s her number one priority. She tells the attorney that she doesn’t want to disturb Jaiden’s life, but this is important, and the attorney says she’ll start the search when she’s drafting the papers. If they hear nothing within 45 days, they’re home free.

Jennifer tells Olivia about the surprise bridal shower she’s throwing for Teresa. They’re doing henna, like in the Turkish culture. Olivia wonders what the garters are, and Jennifer explains that they’re lingerie, like she wants Jennifer to wear for daddy. In Jennifer’s interview, she says, thanks Margaret. Her nine year old daughter thinks she needs to wear lingerie to make her relationship work. Whenever they argue, even if it’s trivial, Olivia gets upset. Jennifer asks Bill if he spent time with the kids while she was away; they were calling her. Bill says, they need to be taught some level of independence, and Jennifer reminds him that the therapist said they take authority more seriously from a father figure. We see a clip of the therapist saying, if dad is taking time for them, they feel it’s important. Bill says, when he’s at work, he’s in a situation where he cares for others, and when he’s home, it’s a different story. That’s the reality of it. In her interview, Jennifer says she could be selfish and live a life of luxury, but she toughs it out for the family. Someone should remind her about saying that the next time she goes shopping for a Birkin. She needs to reevaluate what toughing it out means. Bill says he has to save to put the kids through college, or he wouldn’t work so many hours. Jennifer says, they have to figure out how to do it together. He always blames her when there’s no one to blame; it’s a work in progress. She feels like sometimes they need a referee, and asks if he’d go to see the therapist again, but he says, in this circumstance, no. Jennifer says, they have more issues. His complaints are about her, and hers are about him complaining about her. In her interview, she says, if both of them aren’t participating to make it work, it’s not going to work.

Teresa takes the girls for their dress fitting, and tells the woman that it’s hard to get all four of them in one place at one time. The girls put on their dresses, and Teresa takes photos. Gia calls Juicy Joe, so he can see them, and Teresa says she keeps praying every day. She wants him to come back one day. She gets teary, and Joe says he’s glad she’s happy, and he appreciates what she does for the kids. As long as they’re happy, that’s all that matters. In Teresa’s interview, she says, Joe wishing her happiness shows how far they’ve come. She’s so proud of how they’ve continued their relationship and stayed connected. It makes her daughters happy, and he’ll always be in her life. She tells the girls, the next time they’re in these dresses will be the big day.

Marge, Marge Sr., and Lexi have lunch with Lexi’s mom Ingrid. In Marge’s interview, she says, Ingrid is the ultimate mother and grandmother, jetting in to help. Lexi is separated and staying in the guest house with her son Nino. Marge loves it; they’re all family. Lexi says, it’s a sh*tty situation, but what came out of it was special. Joe #3 is so good with her son. Marge says, Joe loves having Nino there; he’s a good grandfather. And Lexi needed a support system. Lexi says, they were married 8 years, and she’d thought they could get back together, but they couldn’t. Marge Sr. says, he thought they could get back together, and Lexi says she couldn’t have done it without them. Marge tears up, and says, Lexi’s been with her through her divorce, and the hardest times, every disaster. In her interview, Marge says she can’t see life without Lexi. Lexi helped her raise her kids. She’s like Marge’s soulmate, but they don’t have sex. Lexi knew her two faces ago. When she loves, she wants to adopt and share and nurture. No matter how many times she’s been burned, she can’t help it. Marge Sr. can’t understand why Teresa is so nasty to her family, and Marge says, she thinks they mistreat her, but they don’t.

Antonia gets a letter from the Superintendent of Schools commending her for getting on the honor roll, and having straight A’s. In Melissa’s interview, she says, Antonia is a good kid, a little lady. She’s about to get her license, and applied 8 colleges. Most of them aren’t in New Jersey, but Melissa is okay with that. Antonia needs to get out and see what life is like without mommy folding her clothes. Joe #2 wonders who’s beeping a car horn outside, and they all go out to see Melissa’s mother Donna drive up in a car with a bow on it. In Joe’s interview, he says, Antonia is about to turn 17. His mother-in-law adores their children, and Donna wanted to drive the car there. Antonia cries, and in his interview, Joe says, love and happiness are what life is about. Melissa talks about Ireland, and says, it was definitely an emotional trip. Teresa’s remark about Antonia was the lowest blow, but then they went to a farm where they painted a tribute to the bride. She drew their family coming to the United States, and she was sobbing. It was at that point she gave up. She won’t argue anymore. Joe says he doesn’t like that she feels she has to prove herself, and she says she’s going to the bridal shower. In her interview, she says she’s doing everything to keep things in a peaceful place, so they can get by until the wedding. So they can go to the wedding, just for the normalcy of a family member getting married. She tells Joe, after the wedding, she wants off this ride. She’s done. It took her 18 years to say no.

Dolores meets Frank for lunch, and in her interview, she says, the last thing she wants is a sit-down with Frank, but Paulie thinks it’s a good idea. We flash back to Paulie suggesting an in-depth conversation, and Dolores says, it’s never been done. That’s not how they do things. She doesn’t think they even told the kids when they divorced. Gabby was 4 and asked why daddy didn’t live with them. They don’t have emotional talks about feelings. She’s never done this. Frank says, they have so much to catch up on. They used to talk every day. Frankie has his dream job, and he wants to go out for a celebratory dinner. He asked Gabby to come, and Frank asked if he’d told Dolores, but Frankie said she’d feel bad if Paulie didn’t come. Dolores says, Paulie would definitely come, as would Brittany, but Frank says, it’s not their place; it’s their family. In the past, just the four of them would go out. Dolores says, that’s because they weren’t in serious relationships. Their family can grow, and other people can be accepted. She has to consider Paulie’s feelings. Frank says, there’s no reason they can’t have the same relationship. Brittany has no problem with it. Dolores says she doesn’t want Paulie to have a problem with it; she has a problem with it. Frank complains about not having his own relationship with Paulie, and Dolores says, Paulie cares about his relationship with her, not with Frank. Frank whines that when he has the urge to call his mother, she’s not there anymore, and in Frank’s interview, he says, any time he had something bad or good to talk about, he’d call his mother. Since she passed, Dolores has been this person. Dolores tells Frank that he’s getting emotional in his old age, and in her interview, she says, Frank lost his mother and his best friend. She’s sorry about how he feels, but she has to worry about Paulie’s feelings. She tells Frank that it’s nice to say she belongs to somebody. She hasn’t gotten that from anyone else. She tells him, it’s not restriction, but boundaries, and in her interview, she says, Frank will always be family. She can’t throw away 30 years. All she’s asking for is a boundary and some space some. Frank caves, and says, what if they all go; him, Dolores, Paulie, Brittany, Frankie, and Gabby.

Jennifer oversees setting up for Teresa’s surprise shower at a restaurant. In her interview, she says she’s the best bridesmaid to have, and there are no bad seeds in the bridal party. Teresa’s chosen family is here to celebrate, and who doesn’t like a surprise? Good ones, not the bad ones. Gia arrives, and says she told Teresa that they were meeting for lunch. While driving the other girls to the not-really-a-lunch, Teresa talks to Louie, who says he’s sending a text for the dinner on Thursday. He’s invited everyone but Melissa and Joe. Teresa asks if he knows the cameras are on. They’re filming.

Louie says, oh sh*t. Okay. He has to invite everyone, or it wouldn’t be fair. I wonder if they’re this stupid or they think Bravo is. Milania asks why they’re inviting Melissa and Joe, and Teresa says, being upset and angry takes more energy. In Teresa’s interview, she says she doesn’t like to tell the girls everything that’s going on with the family if she doesn’t have to, and the wedding’s a week away. She tells them, there’s always light at the end of the rainbow. The shower décor is all pink, gold, and white; and a lot classier than all of these women put together. Melissa talks with Louie’s sister Veronica, and in Melissa’s interview, she says, Teresa’s new sister-in-law is lovely. She wants that for Teresa, and doesn’t understand why she feels it’s them or her. She’s replaced them. It’s like she has someone to call family now, so bye. Melissa finds out Veronica is officiating, and Gia comes over to say hello to Melissa, which makes for a very strained moment. There’s an announcement that appetizers are being served now, and for the guests to go to the main room. I guess Jennifer rented the whole place? It’s like the wedding before the wedding. The women talk about Ireland, and Melissa says, something seemed off with Danielle. Danielle says, a few things were off, and Dolores says, Danielle wears her heart on her sleeve. Marge asks if Melissa has spoken to Teresa, and Melissa says, of course not, and it’s making her sad. In Danielle’s interview, she says, Melissa is on Teresa’s terms, and feeling a certain way, so she doesn’t want to add any stress. Not today. Teresa arrives, and everyone gets out their phones. The MC tells them, make some noise for Teresa.

Teresa says she feels so special, being in a room full of women paid to be celebrating her. She had no idea. In her interview, she says, Louie’s mom is so sweet. She reminds Teresa of her own mom, and she wishes her mom was here. Everyone is seated, except for Melissa, who has to eat in a bathroom stall. Just kidding. More food porn! Danielle tells Dolores and Jennifer that she went to Ireland one person, and came home another. Her eyes are wide open, and she’s going to pick and choose her battles. Dolores says, that comes with age and experience, and Jennifer tells them, there’s something to be said for being older and wiser. Dolores says, she loves their youth, but wouldn’t buy back those days. Rachel sits down, and in Danielle’s interview, she says she’s trying to take it as it comes. Rachel can be sweet and nice, then boom! When it’s , it’s nice, but when it’s not, she doesn’t want to  there. In Rachel’s interview, she says, you can only push so much before she pokes back. She wants to move forward. They need to put on their big girl panties, and carry on. Teresa thanks everyone for coming, and says she was surprised. She thanks pretty much everyone in the room for something except Melissa, and in Marge’s interview, she says, Teresa just can’t just say she’s happy her sister-in-law is here. It feels intentional, and must be making Melissa feel like she’s not wanted. Jennifer has all the single girls knead the henna and think about the man they want to marry. In Jennifer’s interview, she says, henna gives abundance, love, and prosperity. Some woman, whose name I miss, tells Melissa that Teresa is in the wrong. She told Teresa that she’s only got one brother, and should have mentioned Melissa. Jennifer puts a veil on Teresa, who sits in the middle with the henna, while the women dance around the bride. Jennifer says, she’ll absorb the good energy, and in Danielle’s interview, she says she loves activities. They’re dancing and making noises. Over the top big is her thing. Teresa tells Jennifer that she loves it, and Jennifer says, that’s what bridesmaids do. Teresa says, it’s happy and fun, and no negative energy.

Give it a minute.

Next time, Jen’s mom is an identical twin, and they still dress alike at 80; the dinner with Frank happens; Danielle’s mom tells her that her brother doesn’t want to fix it; Louie says, he wants to talk to Teresa’s brother as much as a rat in the street, and he’s pulling her out of the snake pit.

🤔 Pondering Weak and Weary…

Join me tomorrow for some soap and VanderOmens. Until then, stay safe, stay looking both ways before you cross the street, and stay remembering, there’s always light at the end of the rainbow.

May 1, 2023 – Anna and Holly Head For Greenland, Gary Is An Awful Person With a Man Bun On Deck, Carl Panic Attacks Himself Into the Hospital & First

Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

A huge crate comes into the warehouse, and a guy we’ll just call Mr. P tells a guard to bring in the others, but Sonny says, not yet. Last time he did something for Pikeman, he was ambushed at his own warehouse. Let’s talk about that.

Somewhere in Greenland. Obrecht looks at some slides, and Victor comes in, since he won’t let her work in peace. I’m not sure how he expects anyone to get anything done when he’s interrupting them all the time. He asks her to give him some good news, and she says, the antigen is sound. He asks why she doesn’t sound more upbeat about it, and she says, the antidote is uncertain and you won’t stop bugging my ass. Without it, those he has marked for survival may perish. A significant roadblock, no? He says, that’s the thing about roadblocks. You just have to find your way around them, and he has complete faith she can do just that. She says she can find workarounds, but these things take time. He says, that’s the one thing none of them have, especially not her great niece Willow.

Outside, a guard says, let’s go back, and the other says, sounds good to him. As they’re about to leave, the phone Valentin dropped starts to ring, and one guard asks if the other heard that. Valentin pops out from behind the rock, and they tell him, don’t move.

Martin meets Nina at the MetroCourt, and she thanks him for coming straight from the airport. How is his mom? He says, his mom is high-spirited and happy, and thanks her for asking. He just wishes he could say the same thing as for his sister. Nina says, she must be going through it. Nina also has someone she loves trapped on the Haunted Star, and it’s been non-stop fear. Martin says, Laura hasn’t answered any of his calls today. He’s going over to her place after they take care of business. That being said, what was so important that Nina had to see him the minute he landed? She says she asked him to inform the SEC about Carly and Drew’s insider trading, and he says, what of it? She says she needs him to call it off.

Carly goes back to the Quartermaine mansion, and Michael lets her in. She hugs him, and says she feels awful for ruining Willow’s big night. He says he and Willow are married; tonight is far from ruined. Besides, it’s not her fault; it’s Ned’s fault. She asks if Ned actually admitted turning them in, and Michael says, of course (🍷) not, but if it wasn’t Ned, who would have gone to the SEC?

Martin tells Nina that the SEC isn’t Wyndham’s. They don’t have a return policy on criminal behavior. She says, that’s what she figured, but she thought she’d ask, and he says, now it’s his turn. What’s with the second thoughts? She says, there are just some things she hadn’t fully considered with regard to potential fallout. He says, that might be, but he’s sorry. This is a done deal. She says, this could be a lot of worrying for nothing. There’s no guarantee the SEC is going to act on the anonymous tip that he left anytime soon, or at all. He says, actually, he thinks she’ll find the government has exceeded their expectations. He got a call from a friend of his about Carly. She was there at the police station tonight, being interviewed by the SEC.

Mr. P says, Pikeman was alarmed and dismayed to hear about the attempt on Sonny’s life, and they want to assure him, they’d never be party… Sonny says he knows Pikeman wasn’t behind the shooter. He confirmed their lack of involvement. Brick says, the shooter was untraceable. No fingerprints or DNA in any database. Mr. P says, so a professional, and Brick says, of a specific kind. He’s had military training, probably special ops. Sonny says, that’s not the kind of personnel he deals with, which leads him to believe he was just a means to an end. So whoever tried to kill him, did it to screw with Pikeman.

Anna says, Jordan is going to run interference for them long enough to keep the WSB at bay, and Holly says, Robert should be here any minute to help them hammer this out. The WSB absolutely cannot find out that Victor may be about to deploy a biological weapon on the world. Scotty walks in and says, that’s not their decision to make.

A guard asks, who else is here with Valentin? but Valentin says he’s here alone. The guard asks who he is, and he says he’s Valentin Cassadine. He’s here to see his father.

Holly says she doesn’t know what Scotty thinks he heard, and Scotty says, she seems to have made a miraculous recovery for someone who was burned up in a fire. There’s no scars or anything. If the two of them think they’re going to sacrifice his girlfriend, they’ve got another guess coming. Robert comes in, and tells them, keep it down. He could hear them all the way down the hall. Scotty asks if Robert is in cahoots with them as well, and Anna says, Scotty is operating under the misapprehension that they don’t want Liesl rescued. Robert says, as usual, Scotty has it all backward, and Scotty says, does he? He overheard Drew a while ago, talking about how Robert is withholding some information… Anna asks how long he’s been listening in, and Holly says, Jordan just left ten minutes ago. Anna says, he hasn’t done anything, has he? and Robert says, please tell him that Scotty hasn’t made contact with the WSB.

Obrecht tells Victor, don’t dare threaten Willow. Willow is her family, her great niece. She needs Obrecht’s help. Victor says he’s not threatening anyone; he’s just stating facts. The longer it takes her to prove the efficacy of the antidote, the less time her niece has to undergo a lifesaving procedure. She asks if she has his word he’ll release her if she completes the project (like his word means something), and he says, there’s only one way to find out. Do her job. A guard tells Victor that someone claiming to be his son is on the island, and Victor says he wants to speak to them. The guard radios that Victor wants to speak to the intruder, and Valentin says, hello, dad. Victor says, bring him here. Now.

Scotty says, news flash for Robert. After Ashford left, what he did or didn’t do is none of Robert’s business. Anna says, whether Scotty believes them or not, they’re all working toward the same outcome. So he needs to tell them if he relayed any information he heard to the WSB. Scotty says he doesn’t think they’re all working for the same outcome, but just to be on the level with them, he hasn’t said anything to anybody… yet. Anna says, he does understand people’s lives are at stake, and he says, how dare she say that to him? Liesl’s being held by a madman who wants to burn down the world. Robert says, they’re all working hard… Scotty says, at what? They have information that they could pass along to the WSB, and they can take out Victor. Now they’ve got the Commissioner working for them. None of this makes any sense to him. Holly slips out of the room, and Scotty says, Liesl’s done some pretty horrible things in her day, but he won’t let her be collateral damage for Anna and Robert. Anna tells him, just listen… but he says, save it. Because you know what? If they don’t tell the WSB, he sure as hell will.

Nina asks if Martin is telling her that Carly was officially questioned. She’s kind of shocked that the SEC acts so quickly. Martin says, so is he (me too!). Turns out the government is flat-footed and backlogged in everything but insider trading. That, and alimony payments. Just miss a couple of those suckers, and see what happens. Then again, it probably has more to do with his herd of ex-wives than it does with the government. Nina asks, what’s next with Carly and Drew? and Martin says, doubtless, Carly will face some sort of investigation, as will Drew. He’s sorry. At this point, it’s in the attorney’s hands. Now if there’s nothing else he can do for her, he’d like to go visit his sister. She thanks him, and he says he understands she’s worried, but there’s no point in second-guessing anything. She didn’t incite Drew or Carly to do anything. If there was insider trading, they did it themselves. All she did was report it. He says, goodnight, and leaves.

Michael brings Carly into the living room, and Willow says, they were so worried about her. Carly says she’s sorry the whole situation with the SEC overshadowed Willow’s wedding, but Willow says, the wedding was over. She’s just glad the police didn’t hold Carly longer, and that Drew is safe. Carly says, Sonny showed up and told the SEC that Drew was on a plane to Maui, and it did buy them some time. She’s no fan of Sonny’s, but she’s grateful he showed up when he did. Willow says, as far as she’s concerned, that’s proof they’re still important to him, and Carly looks at Michael. That’s right, Michael. Put Sonny away, and there will be no more stepping in to help when you need a weird favor.

Sonny tells Mr. P, seems to him, someone had a vested interest in preventing the shipment. So he has to wonder if that has something to do with what’s in the cargo. Mr. P says, that was a third party trying to stop them. He doesn’t see why the contents of the shipment is relevant. Sonny says, somebody tried to take his life. Mr. P doesn’t think that’s relevant? He had the assumption they were shipping weapons. Now he’s beginning to think they’re moving something bigger than guns. Mr. P says, they were under the impression Sonny wanted to minimize his involvement. Provide storage and facilitate shipping only. Sonny says, his impression’s wrong, and Mr. P signals to his man who picks up a crowbar, and opens the crate. Lousy spy Dex looks at the camera he hid. Brick moves some of the packing material around, and says, what the…? He tells Sonny, these are some of the world’s most powerful explosives, and Sonny asks, how powerful? Brick says, one brick could take out an entire city block. He steps aside with Sonny, and tells him, that stuff is in high demand. It’s very hard to get. People like it because it’s malleable and waterproof, and a little goes a long, long way. The US military keeps it under tight control; real tight. Sonny tells Mr. P, if this is the cargo they’re sending through his docks, he’s surprised more people didn’t take shots at it, and Mr. P tells Sonny, what can he say? Great rewards come with high risks. Sonny asks what fortune cookie he got that from says, this is something he’s not understanding. He feels like he’s taking all the risks.

Carly says, putting aside her situation with Sonny, she knows he’s worried about both of them, and Michael says he thinks the most important thing right now is to bring Liesl home safe and sound so she can be a bone marrow donor for Willow. And Drew is the one making that happen; not his dad. Willow says, Sonny decoyed the SEC to give Drew time to go after Liesl, you moron. Doesn’t that count for something?

Mr. P says, in regard to what’s in the crates, that information is tightly controlled. Leaks are very rare, and when they occur, those involved are dealt with swiftly. Are they going forward or not? Sonny adjusts his tie and says, Pikeman can use his docks this time, but not again. Not until they renegotiate the deal. By renegotiating the deal, he means he wants information on who’s behind the ambush. Mr. P says, understood, and tells his men to close the crate. Sonny thanks Brick for taking care of the Drew situation, and Brick says, his pleasure. Sonny asks if Brick can take care of the rest here. Nina’s waiting for him, and Obrecht’s missing. Brick says he’s got Sonny, and Sonny says he appreciates it. He tells Mr. P that his associate will take charge of the shipment from here, and calls Dex over. He says, Dex just needs to make sure the cash exchange goes smoothly. We see the camera recording them.

Victor snatches the walkie from his guard, and says, once they’ve brought him his son, check on their guests they left aboard the Haunted Star. Obrecht says, what an intriguing turn of events. But of course (🍷) he’s the man who thinks of everything. She’s sure he thought of his son showing up. He tells a guard to conduct a thorough search. There’s no way his son came here alone.

The guards move Valentin along, and behind the rock, Curtis says, there’s only one way to tell if it’s safe for them to move. He draws his gun, and comes out, Drew motioning for Laura to stay put.

Robert says, they can’t have Scotty rushing off to the WSB with what he just heard, but Scotty says, he doesn’t need their permission. Anna says, he has to understand, they have their reasons, and he says he’s all ears. She says, first of all, they don’t have incontrovertible proof, and he says he thinks he’ll just give the WSB a little call, taking out his phone. Anna says, if he makes that call… when Holly suddenly puts a cloth over Scotty’s mouth and nose, and he passes out. Holly smiles.

Mr. P hands Brick a briefcase, and says, it’s all in there. Brick says, they’re going to count it to be sure, and passes it to Dex. Dex opens the case, and Mr. P says, the last thing Pikeman would do is cheat Mr. Corinthos. They’re hoping this is the beginning of what will be a profitable relationship. Brick says, that will be up to Mr. Corinthos, and Mr. P says, deals this profitable aren’t easy to come by. Mr. Corinthos will find his affiliation with Pikeman will be life changing.

Michael says he sees Sonny is making an effort, but that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t be held accountable for his actions in the past. Carly asks if they can’t just focus on the future, or try to, and Michael asks, what happened at the police station? Carly says she knows the government has frozen Aurora’s accounts and assets, and Michael says, damn it, Ned. Although he shouldn’t be surprised Ned’s games impacted the family business. What he can never forgive is Ned hurting Carly and Drew in the process. Willow asks if he really believes Ned would hurt them this way. He’s always been so kind. Michael says, Ned is a Quartermaine. He always puts ELQ ahead of everything else. He gets that it’s hard for Willow to see that; she always sees the best in everybody. She says, not always.

Nina walks into Pizzulo’s, and tells Kevin that Sonny’s expecting her.  He opens Sonny’s office door, and she goes in. She and Sonny kiss, and Sonny says, sorry to call her down here, but he needed to talk to someone. She says, tell her about the wedding, but he says he’s not going to. He doesn’t want her to be sad, but she says she wants to hear about it. How was Willow? He says, she looked beautiful, a vision, and Nina says she knew Willow would be. Everything wasn’t too much for her? He says, she did great. Nina should have seen the kids. She says she’s sure Wiley was very handsome. How did Donna and Avery do as flower girls? He says, terrible… Just kidding. She should have seen Baby Amelia; she had this pretty little dress on. He took pictures like she wanted. She thanks him, and says she’s glad Willow had a perfect day. He says, it wasn’t quite perfect, and she says, it was too much for Willow, wasn’t it? What happened? He says, no. Some agent from the SEC hauled Carly into the PCPD for colluding with Drew on insider trading. Nina flashes back to being on the phone with Martin, and saying she hasn’t changed her mind; just the opposite. She wants him to go all out and expose Drew and Carly for insider trading. She says, it happened at the wedding? and Sonny says, the good news is, they only held her a few hours. She asks if he thinks that’s the end of it, but he says, no, not for Carly or for Drew. The SEC is trying to find him now. She asks if Drew wasn’t at the wedding, and Sonny says, she hasn’t heard yet?

Curtis comes back, and says, the coast is clear. There’s no sign of any other guards. He thinks the best plan is to head to the Haunted Star. Laura says, but they don’t know how many guards Victor has on that ship, or scouring the rest of the island. They have to assume Victor knows Valentin didn’t come to the island by himself. Drew says he can go with Curtis to get everyone off that boat, and Curtis says he thinks the two-man approach is probably best. Drew asks if Curtis wants him to get Victor’s attention, and keep it off the Haunted Star, and Curtis says, exactly. Does he have any idea how to gain entry into the bunker? Laura says she knows how. (Of course <🍷> she does.) They give Victor exactly what he’s looking for – Valentin’s accomplice.

Robert gently settles Scotty into a chair, and asks Holly, sweetie pie, what have you done? She says she neutralized the threat; temporarily anyway. Anna says she thought she was getting through to him, but Holly says, he was literally dialing the phone to the WSB. They couldn’t take that chance. He’s got tunnel vison. He would literally do anything to save Obrecht. And doesn’t the Bureau strongly recommend against forming attachments? He says, that’s a rather cold calculation, and she thanks him. Anna asks how long he’ll be out, and Holly says, for a few hours. Then he’ll come around with a devil of a migraine. Anna says she’s concerned that Laura and the rest of the crew have no idea what Victor is actually planning, and Robert says, along with everyone else on that island. Holly says, which is why they have to get on the next flight to Greenland. Robert says he’s ready within the hour, and Anna says she’s ready now, hopping out of bed.

Laura says, Drew captures her and holds her prisoner, and gains entry by delivering her to Victor. Drew says, she’s here to rescue her grandsons. He can’t put her at Victor’s mercy, especially when he doesn’t have any. She says, he’s right, and she’s not going to rest until her grandsons are safe, and he’s not getting past those guards without her. Curtis says, he and Laura have been friends a long time; they’ve trusted each other with their lives. Trusting him with her life is one thing; trusting he can rescue her grandkids is another. He promises her, he won’t leave the Haunted Star without them. He’d rather die before he’d let anything happen to Trina or her boys. She says she believes that. So she’ll go with Drew, and keep Victor busy. They hear radio static coming toward them.

Robert asks what Anna is doing, and she says, taking care of business. It’s what she does. He says, it’s what they all do, what they’re best at, but she’s recuperating and has nothing to prove. She says she believes she has a score to settle with Victor, and he says, she’s one stubborn woman. Holly tells him, she would say brave, but she does have to ask. Is Anna sure she’s up for this? Anna says she has to see it through, and Robert asks if this is because of Valentin. Is this guy really worth the risk? Anna tells him, stop talking, and looks around for her clothes. She finds the bag with her stuff, and Robert asks, what about Scotty? Holly says, he’ll be unconscious for some time. He says, then he’ll just go home, pack a bag, and… Don’t even think it. Anna says, he has to stay here, and not just because there’s an unconscious man in her room, and Holly says she’s with Anna. If the WSB gets wind of what they’re doing, he can buy some time. And he can keep them posted on what’s happening in Port Charles. He says, it’s not that he doesn’t have faith in them – he does – but this is probably the most dangerous mission they’ve ever embarked on. Anna and Holly go on either side of him, each taking an arm, and walk him to the door. Holly says, she and Anna were both married to him, and they’ll survive. She gently pushes him into the hallway, and closes the door. She and Anna fist bump.

Victor tells Obrecht to get back to work, and she says, what’s the point? Valentin found him. It’s only a matter of time before others do too. He says, all the more reason to expedite her work, and she says, time is not the only impediment here. The stabilizers and some stuff I don’t understand are all insufficient. He says, in layman’s terms, what’s going on? and she says, in order to make this work, she needs preservatives, single dose vials. Otherwise, the antidote could be easily contaminated. He says, precisely why he has her here. He knows she can get past these problems. She says, even if she could solve the preservative problem, this endeavor of his is reckless, futile, doomed. He says he seems to recall her saying this could be a crowning scientific achievement, and she says, scientifically speaking, she still does, but it’s time to retreat, regroup. He says, if he stops the process now, who knows how long this will set him back. She says, he’s made a valiant effort. His brilliant plan just can’t come to fruition under these circumstances. He says he supposes she’s right. He just has to reevaluate part of his plan. She says, good, and thanks him for listening to her, but he says he hasn’t been bested. Not by his son or by any doubt. He still holds all the cards, including her.

Sonny says, there’s a possible location on Nina’s Aunt Liesl, and she asks where Victor took Obrecht. He says he can’t say, because he doesn’t know, but what he does know is, Drew went out to find her. That’s why he was missing from the wedding. He went out to find Nina’s aunt. He’s going to bring her home and save Willow’s life. Don’t worry about it. He threw the SEC off the scent. He got Brick to make Drew’s name appear on a manifest for a flight going from San Diego to Maui. They won’t know he’s not there until he doesn’t get off the plane. She says, but that’s just a temporary dodge. Eventually, the SEC will find out it’s a false lead, and be back on Drew’s trail. What if the SEC finds Drew before he can bring Aunt Liesl home? What does that mean for Willow? I’d say, there’s no way they’re going to Greenland, but since they show up on an anonymous tip before you hang up the phone, who knows?

Carly tells Willow, it’s all her fault. Drew did everything he could to discourage her from investing in Aurora, but she wouldn’t listen. Michael did too, but she was so determined to support them. Now look. It all came back to bite her. She lost her hotel, there’s an SEC investigation, Aurora’s assets have been frozen… Michael says, let’s forget about that. It can be dealt with later. He thinks they should call it a night. Carly says, of course (🍷). She agrees. She suggests she walk Willow to the gatehouse while Michael wraps things up here, and Willow asks Michael to find her bouquet. She wants to put it in water, and make it last a few more days. Carly tells him to make sure he gets the top of the wedding cake. They have to put it the freezer at the gatehouse, so they can eat it on their first wedding anniversary. True story. We did that, but since our freezer was so small, my in-laws kept it in theirs. The day before our anniversary, my husband went to pick it up, and his brother had eaten it the previous day, not knowing what it was. FYI, frozen cake does not taste that great after a year.

The guards come around to the rock again, when Laura comes limping out, wailing for help. They ask what she’s doing here, and she thanks them, saying, she needs help. She limps to them, and before they realize it, locks arms with the both of them, and says, now boys. Curtis and Drew rush the guards.

Brick takes the briefcase, and tells Dex that he can find his own way back. He goes to the door, turns around, and says, words of advice if Dex wants to stay in this business. Outside of Sonny, trust nobody. Dex says, not even him? and Brick says, especially not him, and leaves. Dex flashes back to hiding the camera when Brick was talking to Sonny on the phone.

Sonny tells Nina, Drew’s a smart guy. He’s sure Drew’s taken every precaution in covering his tracks. She says, but the government is resourceful. Drew is missing. Won’t that intensify everything? He says, probably so, and she says, this could interrupt the rescue mission; make it impossible for Drew to bring Aunt Liesl home. And Aunt Liesl is Willow’s last chance. Again I ask, why aren’t they actively looking for another donor? Sonny tells her, take it easy. He’s going to do everything he can to make sure Drew’s mission is successful. She thanks him, and says, surely the SEC has bigger fish to fry than Carly and Drew. He says he doesn’t know about that, and don’t call him Shirley. From his experience, the government prioritizes its money. He doesn’t know who tipped off the SEC, but they’re not only hurting Carly and Drew, they’re hurting Willow.

Carly brings in the wheelchair, and Willow says she never thought she’d get to the point she couldn’t walk to the gatehouse. Carly says, it’s been a long day for Willow, helping her into the chair, and Willow says, for Carly too, and not in a good way. Carly says, Diane’s an amazing lawyer. She’ll get it all figured out. Willow asks how she can be so sure, and Carly says she knows if they stick together as a family, they can make it through anything. They join hands.

Dex gets the camera, turns it off, and says, gotcha. He takes out his phone, and leaves the warehouse.

Michael’s phone dings, and he says, Dex. He sees a money and camera emoji, and flashes back to telling Dex, so Sonny draws the line at drugs, but is willing to ship weapons of war. Dex says, there’s only two reasons people want to ship under the cloak of darkness. Either what they’re shipping is dirty, or what they’re moving is being supplied to dirty people. This deal is extremely lucrative for Sonny, but extremely dicey. Michael says, this is how they bring Sonny down.

Holly lets Robert back in the room, and he says, Anna is in no shape to go charging off to Greenland. She says, perhaps he’s right, but she feels that they’re all in for a world of hurt if Victor’s plan is successful. Holly says, sorry to leave him with this mess, and he says he’s been cleaning up messes for the both of them for years now. He’s highly experienced at it. Anna says, and they love him for it. She and Holly kiss Robert on the cheek, and he smiles. They leave, and Scotty mumbles in his sleep.

Laura waits behind the rock, when Curtis and Drew come back dressed in the guards’ uniforms. Laura says, very convincing, and Curtis says he is going to bring them home safely. All of them. She says she knows he will. Good luck. He jets, and Drew asks if Laura is absolutely sure she wants to do this. She can still wait by the seaplane until he gives the all-clear. She says she knows he wants to protect her, but he can’t get past those guards without her. And once they get inside… they’ll think of something. He has to trust that she knows what she’s doing. He says, okay. Let’s do this. She says, from this point on, she’s his prisoner, and he ties her wrists in front. They head for the bunker, Drew following Laura with his gun drawn.

Victor says he’s sure it fits with Obrecht’s agenda for him to give up now, but his plan is moving ahead. He just has to speed up the timetable. She says, there’s no way to know if the antidote is viable without testing it on a human subject, and he says, that’s the plan. She says she refuses to use Spencer or Trina as her test subjects. She won’t risk cutting short a young, innocent life. He asks if she’d have qualms about using a more mature subject. Someone who’s decidedly less innocent. Valentin is brought in, and Victor says, perfect timing, son.

The text says, In Loving Memory of Nneka Garland, and we see photos.

Tomorrow, Dex asks Josslyn how Drew managed to avoid the SEC; Robert asks Elizabeth to trust him; and Valentin tells Victor to end this madness.

Below Deck Sailing Yacht

2nd day of charter. In Colin’s interview, he says, Chase has a good work ethic, but in Gary’s interview, he says, Chase thinks he knows more than he does. There’s no way in hell he’d talk back to a superior that way. He’s been working on boats for 12 years. Shut it and listen to him. He tells Chase, the boat looks good, and asks Glenn if they’ll be sailing, but Glenn says, there’s not much breeze in the forecast. Glenn tells primary Kim that they’re not getting any wind, so there won’t be much sailing, and she says she understands. He suggests taking them out in the tender, and setting up the rope swing. Breakfast is served, and there’s smoked salmon eggs benedict that makes me want to cry. In Daisy’s interview, she says, the negative feedback makes her feel like she’s sh*t at her job. So she’s taking the opportunity to train the stews as much as she can, and make sure Glenn stays the f*** off her back. Ileisha ordered eel for making sushi, and realizes she’s received a live one. In her interview, she says, they’re like the snakes of the ocean, and freak her out. Growing up in the bush, a python once came through the window, and wrapped itself around the bath. She screamed for help, and her dad had to chop its head off. She was traumatized. Colin cuts the head off, and Lucy screams. She says, it’s horrible, and in the meantime on deck, Kim is saying, this is the most incredible experience.  

The guests go swimming, and Daisy tells the stews to do the cabins. Gary finds that the eFoils (kind of like surfboards) haven’t been charged, and whines about things not being done. Chase asks if one of the stews can come on the tender to pour drinks for the guests, but Gary says he’s sure Chase can go by himself. Lucy tells Glenn that Daisy is sleeping, and she’s not making the call, so Glenn says he’ll make the call. He’s sending her with Chase. In Chase’s interview, he says, thank God he’s self-. The guests are expecting a certain standard. If this was his first time working on a boat and he needed to be taught, considering Gary’s leadership style, he’d be f***ed. When Daisy wakes up, Mads tells her that Lucy went on the tender, but fails to mention Glenn is the one who sent her. Colin and Gary get the eFoils going and ride them out to the tender, and when Daisy sees them, she gets doubly pissed off. In her interview, she says, the boys can f*** around, but the girls have to be with the guests at all times. She’s fuming.

The guests come back, and Lucy explains that Glenn told her to go. Glenn curses the fact there’s no wind, and Chase tells Mads that he’d like to get with Mads. Gary tells the guests that they’ll set up the rope swing for after lunch, and Lucy tells Mads about Chase. Mads says, that’s literally not happening, and in her interview, she says, it was one kiss bro; relax. It’s not that she’s not interested, but there are a lot of other guys on the boat, and she’s sure there are other options. She loves samples. In Alex’s interview, he says he typically dates models with daddy issues, and it hasn’t gone extremely well. Mads is new for him. She’s not high maintenance. Maybe it’s time to break the mold. Ileisha is running late, and in Daisy’s interview, she says, Ileisha is feeling the pressure, since she’s a little late with service, but the guests are so lovely, she doesn’t think they really care… which she’s grateful for. When I see the lunch chef has prepared, I’d willingly wait for it too. Anchor is home, and Daisy tells Ileisha that the guests very happy. The boat moves along, and Glenn asks Colin how the engine is doing. Colin says, it’s purring, and Gary tells Chase to take a break, but Chase says he’s got to set up the rope swing. Gary thinks it’s going to be a long season, and in his interview, he says, it doesn’t seem like anything he tells Chase matters. Daisy complains to Gary about Lucy leaving the boat, and in Gary’s interview, he says, it’s easier licking Daisy’s ass than disagreeing with her. He’s just going to tell her what she wants to hear.  They anchor at Grande Pervero, and Chase falls asleep in the crew mess. In Ileisha’s interview, she says she’s doing a bourbon tasting menu, and it’s best to serve something soft, smoky, salty with a heavy liquor. She’s making southern comfort food, and plans on knocking it out of the park with her presentation. Guest Justin (Guarini) tells the others to tell his children that he loves them before going on the rope swing. I have to say, he looks good; a lot better than when he was on American Idol. Guest Kelly lets go too early, and wails that she hurt her right boob.

Daisy says, they’re doing the table in orange and brown, and eww! Gary with his hair out of the man bun is worse than in the man bun. As far as I’m concerned, there are only two men in the world allowed to have man buns; Sensei Guillermo Gomez and Roger Howarth. Daisy tells Gary that he smells of tea tree and his fly is open. He asks why she’s looking. Primary Ian says, the attention to detail is amazing, and in the galley, Ileisha frets over the lamb being overcooked. She says, there’s always something. She can never do everything right. Glenn tells her not to let it get to her; she’s doing great, and he thinks it will be fine. Ian realizes they left a mess of clothes on the floor, and jets to the cabin to pick everything up, but Mads and Lucy already have it done. He says he came down to clean up their mess, and Lucy says, that’s their job. He says, it wasn’t intended, and reminds me of another true story. Someone broke a glass at my wedding reception, so I went back into the kitchen to get a broom to sweep it up. The caterers were like, um… that’s not your job. Kim says she’s warm, fuzzy, and happy inside, and Glenn tells Ileisha that it’s okay to be a perfectionist, but don’t let it break her flow. In Ileisha’s interview, she says she’s a people pleaser, and thinks it comes from her upbringing. She has survivor’s guilt because her mom lost two kids. It was ingrained in her to be the best version of herself, and puts pressure on herself to make sure people are really full and happy. Alex goes on anchor watch, and it starts to thunder. The wind picks up around 1 am, and Alex says, sh*t’s about to get weird. The wind is up to 15 knots by 2 am, there’s lightning, and things are rocking.

Glenn comes out to check what’s happening, and Alex says, there was no wind. He went out to put on the covers, and it suddenly came up. In Gary’s interview, he says, Alex has done everything right so far, but Glenn is quick to react after last season’s anchor drag. He thinks if Colin farted, Glenn would jump out of bed and run to the bridge. Glenn tells Alex to keep a close eye on it, and call him if there’s anything over 20 knots. Another amazing breakfast is served, and I think about the leftover Chinese food I had for dinner. the guests don’t want to leave, and Ian says he saw some cupboards they could hide in. Gary gets picky about something else with Chase, and says, it’s all about being prepared. In Chase’s interview, he says he can’t catch a break with Gary, who’s just looking for a reason to be upset, and in Gary’s interview, he says, Chase is trying to piss him off. The boat is docked, and Glenn radios the crew to say goodbye to the guests. Ian says, he can’t even express what an amazing adventure they’ve been given, and Kim says, they were blown away about the kindness they lead with. She gives Glenn the tip envelope, and says, it’s an honor to give them this. As they leave, Glenn blows the horn and everyone waves. Glenn tells the crew, well done. Daisy tells the stews, the more we get done today, the more we do tomorrow [sic]. I think she might be a little off, and the drinking hasn’t even started. Gary says, he came late, so he’s just being a fly on the wall when they go out. He asks who Colin has his eye on now that he’s single, and in Colin’s interview, he says, Gary’s had it easy for the last two seasons. The girls were fighting over him. For the first time, he has a little competition. Gary says he doesn’t cause drama; drama tends to find him. Ugh. He’s such an a-hole.

At the tip meeting, Glenn says, what a charter. A complete 180 from the first one. He tells Daisy that she did a good job; service was on point. It seems her team found their groove. She says she’s happy with the teamwork and communication, and in her interview, she says she’s elevated by the positive feedback. It’s what they needed, and she’s one step closer to a margarita. Glenn says, they’re good attitude makes a difference, and commends Colin on getting the engine running. He tells Ileisha that it’s not easy doing a meal like the bourbon tasting. Her food has been delicious, and she’s doing a great job. He’s glad Gary is back; it made a big difference. Gary says he’s happy with his team, Alex says he learned a lot, and Glenn says, there’s a reason they have a first officer. The tip is $23K, or 2250 euros each. In Ileisha’s interview, she says, yes and yes. She’ll take that sh*t. You’re welcome. They work for a hot minute, and Gary gets on the radio, saying, this is your captain speaking. It’s time to get f***ed up. The crew changes, and goes to an Italian restaurant. A few of them step away for a smoke, and Ileisha asks who Gary is crushing on. He says, everyone, and Ileisha asks who Chase’s type is – say it. After some poking and prodding, he admits it’s Mads. At the table, Alex says he spent 45 minutes getting ready, and Lucy says, he spends more time on his hair than she does. Gary comes back, and tells Lucy that red is her color. She tells him, f*** off, but Chase senses crying himself to sleep. In his interview, he says, f***ing Gary. He just admitted he liked Mads. He knows a snake when he sees a snake, and Gary is kind of an a-hole. Kind of?

Gary tries to kiss Daisy, but she’s not having it. In her interview, she says, she can’t read Gary. She sees how he behaves with her, and he does the same thing with every single girl. We flash back to Gary putting the moves on pretty much every stew he’s worked with, and Daisy says, it’s hard to take him seriously. Gary says, they can’t have that conversation when alcohol is involved, and the crew goes back to the boat. They get in the hot tub, and Mads tells Gary, touch her, and she’ll  knock his man bun out. Chase sits by himself for a while, then gets out of the jacuzzi and goes to bed. Mads and Gary are left with a falling asleep Alex, and Gary tells him that he’s going to drown. Somehow, Alex manages to get out of the tub, and toddles off. Gary says he thinks Mads is gorgeous. He tells her that both Chase and Alex said they liked her, but at the end of the day, they’re just deckhands, like he’s a huge step up. They kiss, Alex falls asleep as he’s eating in the crew mess, and everyone else is snoring.  

Next time, charter three; high school d-bag vibes; in Daisy’s interview, she says she thinks Gary is f***ing with her; and a guest has an accident.

Summer House

Help. I’m watching this nonsense and I can’t turn away.

During the week, Lindsay meets with Gabby, and in Gabby’s interview, she says, when it comes to her type, it’s better for her to show than tell. She’s made a pdf of men who are possibilities, men she’s slept with, men she wants to sleep with, the ones she’s dated and matched with, and men she’s thought about. Boys for Gabby. Lindsay says, they’re all male models, but Gabby says, some of them have jobs. Ciara meets Rachel at a restaurant, and in her interview, she says she’s throwing a party for herself. She’s been in NYC a year, and thinks this Georgia peach is trying hard to become an apple. NYC has helped her come into adulthood, whether she wanted to or not. She tells Rachel that now when she leaves the city, she can’t wait to get back. I know this feeling. It’s like, ah, the not-so-sweet smell of the subway; I’m home. In her interview, Ciara says, it was hard to leave her friends in Atlanta. Her friends have been the light in her situation, and continue to shine. She needs quality friendships, and in NYC, you can have surface level bullsh*t. Ciara tells Rachel that Chris met Cassidy at a party, and fell off the face of the earth, but he’s supposed to come. I’m guessing Ciara must do okay with being on this show, since I don’t think her nursing salary paid to rent this space. The housemates trickle in, and in Lindsay’s interview, she says, it sucks being in a bad place with Danielle. There’s no reasoning with her. Their versions of being a friend are very different. Carl says he invited Cassidy, and Chris says he did too, but she’s ghosting him. He asked her to text him when she got home, but she didn’t, and he’s not playing that game. Carl says he can run interference, and Kyle says, what he lacks in height, he makes up for in volume. Paige tells Ciara that not everyone can move to NYC, and Craig asks how the dating is going, and she says she’s figuring it out. He says he would never leave his house. People in NYC go on dates with people they don’t know. Ciara says, that’s how dating works, and in Paige’s interview, she says, in South Carolina, everyone knows each other, and they’ve all dated. In NYC, a random man could be the love of your life. She doesn’t know if Craig can vibe in NYC; he might be scared. Yeah he might. Once when I went to a family party in Ohio, one of my young cousins pointed at me and said, she takes the subway at night. Carl tells Kyle and Chris that he picked up the ring; it’s exciting and surreal. Ciara asks everyone to gather around, and says she hates giving speeches. She thanks them for coming, and says, it means so much. She gets teary, and says she loves them. They’ve changed her life, and made NYC feel like home. She can’t wait for the next years. This committed bitch ain’t leaving. In her interview, she says, she’s also committing to herself and her journey. She’s figuring out who she is and fixing what needs to be fixed. She’s down for whatever ride God put her on. She opens a bottle of champagne.

On the way to the Hamptons, Kyle tells Andrea that there’s no Ciara or Amanda this weekend. Andrea says his girlfriend Lexi is coming, but he’s sad Amanda won’t be there. Kyle says, she was very torn, but the dogs got spayed two days ago. Andrea says, she’s doing her mommy job, and getting ready for the real thing. Kyle says he got a call from Lindsay that Carl was in the hospital last night. He calls her, and she says, they went to a concert, and he had his arms around her from behind. He suddenly said he needed to sit, and grabbed her. His legs were wobbling, and he said he couldn’t feel them. She got him to the infirmary, and they said his blood pressure and heart rate were so low, they were sending him the ER. He was discharged two hours ago, and now he’s napping. In Kyle’s interview, he says, Carl texted him from the hospital, and thought it was too much caffeine and Red Bull, but he thinks there are other things going on. Been there, done that. We flash back to Kyle sweating it out before he proposed to Amanda, and he says, Carl knows the proposal is upon them, he fainted, and now he’s in the hospital  freaking out. Lindsay says, they’ll either be there later tonight or first thing in the morning. Kyle tells her, no pressure, and in his interview, he says, only he and Chris know. He’s trying bottle this secret as best he can.

In Danielle’s interview, she says, tonight was inspired by Chris. They’re having Latino night. She’s making empanadas like her mom does, and when you make food close to home, it’s like offering a piece of yourself. In Paige’s interview, she says, no one on the planet doesn’t get excited when Andrea shows up. You don’t know what he’s saying, but he smiles and he’s good looking. She’s glad he’s in love; she hates seeing him cry. It’s against their religion for him to cry. Kyle relays the message about Carl going to the hospital and the drinking commences. Chris is now seeing Lauran, who Mya says she’s been trying to introduce him to since Kyle’s party. Mya demands to know the rating of their sexual encounter, and does a drumroll. Chris says, it was an eight, and everyone cheers.  Sam says, it’s a good number for a first time. Chris says, Danielle is making badass empanadas, and then they’re going to teach everyone to salsa. In Sam’s interview, she says, she and Kory have officially gone below the neck. She didn’t get the ick (I assume this is some immature way of saying she didn’t get laid), but she wants to do it again. Kyle calls Carl, and asks how much he thinks nerves, anxiety, and stress had to do with him ending up in the hospital. Carl says, it was a big part. He’s trying to pull off the surprise of the century. Then he’s bringing in Lindsay’s parents and friends. Kyle says, tomorrow is the big day, and Carl says he thinks some rest will make it better. He had to get it out of his system before getting down on one knee.

Sam says Danielle has outdone herself; everything looks beautiful. Danielle thanks Chris for helping, and has everyone hold up their empanadas for her mom. They do, and Danielle takes a photo. She says she’s enjoyed the summer with Chris there. He brought her Hispanic side out. She hasn’t really shared that, and pushed down that part of her persona because she wanted to succeed. Being in finance, she was around white people, and Gabby says she can identify. She grew up around white people and people of color who weren’t interested in Black girls. She thought she could only be attractive to someone who had a predilection for Black girls. Mya says she always claimed she was an acquired taste, and Danielle says, it’s taken a while to celebrate that side of her and not repress it. Chris says he feels her, and when they met, he felt she was his hermana, his sister. They had a connection. Danielle says she’s happy when the group has these moments, when they do stuff together. Family is about sharing. In Danielle’s interview, she says she feels for the first time in a long time she’s been heard. She’s being her true self, not her Hamptons self; Danielle Rivera, Puerto Rican. They move to another room, and Chris teaches them to salsa. Kyle tells Chris that he talked to Carl, and he looks good. The day before he proposed to Amanda, he was feverish, and recognizes this. Chris asks if he thinks Carl is having second thoughts, but Kyle says he doesn’t think so. Although he thinks Carl would love for Lindsay to be on good terms with her best friend. It’s weighing on him.

In the morning, despite everyone looking like they’re hella hung over, Kory and Kyle go to the gym. Mya says she wants to make the house an all-inclusive resort. She wants to do a boozy brunch. Carl and Lindsay arrive, and there are lots of hugs for Carl. He says he feels rested and better. It was a combination of dehydration, exhaustion, and stress. Lindsay tells the story again, and in Carl’s interview, he says he panic attacked himself into the hospital. Another reminder of how beautiful Lindsay is, is that she slept with him the entire time. And she doesn’t know what’s about to happen. On a whiteboard, Mya writes, Myadani Bottomless Brunch, and in Paige’s interview, she says, if there’s a whiteboard around, Mya will use it. Andrea’s girlfriend Lexi comes in next, and Kyle says, they have a bonfire planned for later, and the attire is elevated chic. For whatever stupid reason, Andrea says he wants to be roasted, and they ask a bunch of inappropriate sex questions. Chris asks what it’s like having Lexi here with Paige at the table.

Lexi says, it’s not like she doesn’t know they slept together, and Paige says, it was a fling, and she never wants Lexi to feel uncomfortable. Have brunch manners. Sam says she’s going to make out with Kory, and Gabby says she loves new love. Lexi talks with Lindsay and Carl, and asks how long they’ve known each other, and Lindsay says, since summer 2017. Lexi asks if there was always an attraction, and Carl says, for sure, and we flash back to Carl saying, she’s like a sister. Lindsay asks how Lexi felt when Andrea was trying win her back, and Lexi says she blocked him, but literally every weekend, she would run into him. He’d pour his heart out, so she decided to give him a chance. She starts to get weepy, and says, it was harsh of her to do to someone she loved so much. Andrea says, it was intense, and Lexi says she’s happy they found their way back to each other. Andrea says, it was his fault, and I hope these two are a good influence on the babies in the house. I know. It’s asking a lot. Mya asks, what’s going on with Sam and Kory? and Sam says, they’ve talked about liking each other in a cute way, but they haven’t talked about what happens after the summer. Have they considered passing notes in the hallway? Mya says, in the grand scheme is where it gets complicated. Carl and Lindsay are going to get firewood, but not really. In Carl’s interview, he says, his plan is perfect. Lindsay thinks they’re getting firewood, but she’s going to realize quickly they’re not doing a fire. He can’t wait for this to be over; it’s stressful. Kyle tells him to knock it out of the park.

Lindsay and Carl head for the beach, and at the house, Mya asks Sam if she wants to be exclusive, and Sam says she’d be so in it. Mya says she thinks Carl is going to propose next weekend, and Danielle asks if she’s talking out of her ass. Mya says she listens to every conversation, and infers things. She saw him talking to Kyle and Chris at Ciara’s party, and thinks he’s planning the engagement for next weekend. Danielle says, then she’d rather not come next weekend, and they can live f***ing happily ever after. Alrighty then.

Carl leads Lindsay to a spot on the beach where there’s a blanket spread out for an upscale picnic. Carl says, they haven’t had a chance to break away from the group and do something special. She asks if she should sit, but he tells her to stand for now, and gets down on one knee. He says, since the day they met seven years ago, he knew she’d be someone special in his life. She’s his person, his best friend, and his lover. He’s excited to build a future with her. She says she loves him so much, and he asks her to marry him. She says, a thousand times yes, and there are kisses and I love yous. He puts the ring on her finger, and I wonder if they keep forgetting each other’s name, since they only seem to call each other babe.

Next time, Paige feels that she gets notoriously the most drunk on Labor Day weekend; Sam asks Kory what he’d like the plan to be; Gabby goes on a date; Danielle gets upset about Carl not telling her about the pending proposal; and Carl doesn’t want a camera following him.

🤸🏾 Tra-La It’s May…

Stop by tomorrow for soap and those awful New Jersey Housewives. Until then, stay safe, stay never forgetting where you came from, and stay remembering your brunch manners.