What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Yeah, yeah, running late again. Here’s what I missed at the beginning. Sasha and Willow ran into each other at the park, and Sasha thought they should get things out in the open. Avoiding Monica, Carly snuck into the Quartermain mansion through the terrace doors when she saw Michael. She asked him to forgive her for lying. At the MetroCourt, Sonny asked Diane to use her skills to get Martin to spill his connection to Cyrus. As Martin tried to leave, they blocked his way. Laura was working on her target practice, when Cyrus went to the stall next to her. Backtracking to yesterday, Sam told Jason, if he left, don’t come back, and here we are.

Sam says she knows Jason has to go, and he says he’ll send Sonny a text, saying he got hung up. He’s not going anywhere until they figure this out. She told him that she can’t keep living like this. Does she mean here with him? Is she asking him to move out? She says, Danny could have died the other night. She can’t stop thinking about it. Standing in the parking lot, holding Danny’s cap. It brought her back to when her brother Danny died. She stood there, holding the one thing she had left of him. Jason says, his baseball cap, and she says it was hard enough to grieve her brother. She doesn’t think she could survive grieving her child. He says he was going to ask her how long she’s been feeling this way, but he guesses he has the answer. Sam says, the bombing was her breaking point. Since then, she’s been thinking about it, and finally realized. There was nothing she could do about her brother then, but there’s certainly something she can do for her son. She can let Jason go.

Sasha tells Willow, she’s so sorry she and Chase hurt her, and Willow asks if she has any idea what it’s like. Chase broke her heart into a million pieces, but so did Sasha. The way she was raised, her parents moved a lot, even before they got involved with DoD. Because of that, she never had a lot of friends; sometimes none. Then came Chase, and Sasha and Michael. The four of them hanging out was so much fun. Sasha was the first true girlfriend she had. The person she could vent to, and go for advice. Then that disappeared. Sasha says, because of something not real. Chase still loved Willow; he always has. Willow says she believes Chase, and believes Sasha, but knowing and trusting are two different things.

Michael says he knows Carly’s intentions were good, and she was justified in not telling him. If she’d told him it was a set-up, he would have had to tell Willow. It would have put her in an impossible position; stay together for Wiley’s sake, or stay with Chase and risk losing Wiley. Carly says if they’d had to make a choice before the custody hearing, it would have been a disaster. He says, thankfully, Nelle is gone, and Willow will know, no matter who they choose, Wiley will be okay. Carly asks, but will he be okay?   

Martin says he was just leaving, and Diane says, but she just got there. Sonny says, he knows Diane, right? and Martin says, she’s quite unforgettable. She says, flatterer, and Sonny says Diane has some questions for him. Martin says he thought he was finished with his Q&A, but Sonny says, not quite. Martin says he can’t talk about any cases that involve any of them, but Diane says he’s mistaken. Sonny, his wife, and his father were the targets in a shooting, and Sonny recently lost a cousin in a bomb explosion. Martin says he’s sincerely sorry for Sonny’s loss, but what on God’s green earth do those appalling acts of violence have to do with him? Sonny says because the man Martin works for caused them – Cyrus Renault.   

Cyrus says Laura is quite the shot, and she says she finds it helpful to visualize. She thinks about someone she’d like to shoot, and boom! pulls the trigger. He says he hopes he’s never in her sights, and she says, he knows what they say about the word never. He says he hadn’t pegged her for a shooting enthusiast, and she says despite his intrusive research, there’s a lot he doesn’t know. He says he’d love for her to fill him in on her history from her own perspective, but she says she’s not there to regale him with stories. Her daughter is lying comatose in a long-term care facility, likely because of him. He says he’d never want to harm her daughter, and she says, if he means that – he tells her that he does – then get the hell out of Port Charles.

Curtis tells Jordan, he wants to go over the information from the medical supply company. Maybe it will lead to how Cyrus knows Florence. Jordan says, the company supplies thousands of facilities, and it’s possible Cyrus just moved her to another house with private care, or changed his plan for all they know. He says, yes to all that, but it’s the only lead they’ve got. Judging from the postcard, Cyrus has a close personal attachment to Florence. They can use that to get leverage on Cyrus, and get Jordan out from under his thumb.

Jason asks if Sam wants to end things, and she says she doesn’t want to; she has to. They both know what happened at The Floating Rib wasn’t an isolated incident. There will always another crisis, another lockdown, and another time they need to take the kids out of bed in the middle of the night to make sure they’re safe. He asks why she didn’t say anything, and she says he hasn’t been around. And what would have changed? For the past several months, she’s been so focused on them being together, living together, she didn’t stop for a second to consider if being with him was right for their family. The hard truth is, it’s just not working anymore.

Jason says he doesn’t want their kids to risk their lives to spend time with him, and Sam says she doesn’t want that either. She knows she said they could make it work, and keep the kids safe. That’s how much wanted be with him; how much she loves him. But she was in denial. She refused to see that the day was coming when it would catch up to him. He says he’d hoped it wouldn’t. When he came back, and they got back together and became a family, everything hit him. He wanted it to last, but she knows him. She says she does, and he says, if she says she wants out, he won’t fight it. She starts to cry.

Laura says she should want Cyrus brought to justice, tried, and convicted for his involvement in the bombing. He starts to say something, but she tells him, don’t deny it; she won’t believe him. She should want those things, and he says, but she doesn’t? She says, she does. She wants that with every fiber in her being, but she wants peace more. She’s the mayor of this town, and puts its people first. She’d rather see him walk free than stay, and watch the damage accumulate. She wants him to go back to where he came from; go anywhere far away. He says he can’t do that, and she says, there are hospitals everywhere. He says while his business investment is a consideration, he has personal reasons for staying.

Diane says they’ve observed Martin and Cyrus talking, and Cyrus paid his tab. Martin says, that’s hardly criminal, but Diane says Cyrus has been involved in a boatload of crimes. He bombed a restaurant that killed three people, and left a mother in a coma. Martin says he believes Julian is responsible, and Diane says, she knows Julian. It would never occur to him to bomb The Floating Rib, unless he was coerced. He has no motive. Cyrus, on the other hand, had motive for days, going by the name of Jason Morgan. Martin says this is far outside his area of expertise, and starts to get up, but Sonny pushes him back into his seat. Diane says, Jason was at The Floating Rib, and was the intended target. The others were collateral damage. Martin says, it’s tragic and monstrous, and Sonny tells him to explain his connection to Cyrus, or he’ll assume Martin is involved with the bombing. Martin says, Sonny would be wrong. He doesn’t know how to say it. He has no idea what his brother has gotten him into. Diane says, his what?

Jordan tells Curtis, they know the file Cyrus had her pull concerns the death of David Hamilton. Maybe they should take another look at the family association. Maybe there’s a connection to Cyrus. He says, he’s thinking Florence is a stronger lead, assuming it’s the Florence who married Laura’s father. Jordan says, for a woman that age, Florence isn’t that uncommon, and Curtis says, they lived in Port Charles for several years. There must be records. He says he thinks he’ll get some fresh air, and she says, if he’s going to call in a favor that’s illegal to call in… He says he certainly wouldn’t tell the Commissioner. Deniability, and all that stuff.

Sam says, part of her wants Jason to fight for her, and wants him to change, but she already knows he can’t. He says he loves her. He doesn’t want to lose her or the kids, but he can’t lie. He’s tried to leave before, and ended up going back. She says she knows. It’s part of the reason why she fell in love with him; his loyalty and his code. It’s why, in the beginning she never questioned how he lived, and never questioned his work or how it could be just anywhere. He says, but kids change things, and she says she doesn’t want Danny and Scout to live in fear. She doesn’t want to live fear for them, and most of all, she doesn’t want them to die the way Morgan did.

Sonny says, Martin’s brother is Cyrus? and Martin says, correct. Diane says she admits she didn’t think at all this was where her line of questioning was going, but it’s bizarre enough to be true. It’s fascinating. Martin is glad to entertain her, and she asks where they’re from, and how estranged they are. Sonny asks how long Martin has been helping Cyrus get his hooks in the town.

Laura says, the way Cyrus presented it, he had no personal reason to be there; no personal connection whatsoever. He tells her that he didn’t materialize fully formed. He had a childhood, and family he cares about. She says, but has no regard for anyone else’s family. Lulu’s children could grow up without a mother. He says he didn’t realize Lulu might not recover. If she’s not satisfied with where Lulu is, he knows of some excellent long-term care facilities in Vermont. She says she’s not interested in his helpful hints. As far as his target practice goes, she thinks he should reschedule. She can’t be sure one of her shots won’t just go astray – he laughs – and hit a bystander. He says, under her civilized façade, she has a wild streak like his own. She tells him, keep pushing, and he’ll find out just how wild a streak it is. He says, always a pleasure, and leaves. Laura makes a call, and says she needs to see them now.

Willow asks if Sasha has thought about what’s next, and Sasha says, Lucy and Maxie have gone above and beyond, and even Valentin has been decent. They told her there’s still a place for her at Deception. She just has to get over her mortification, and show up for work. Willow says, there’s a great counseling group at the hospital, but Sasha says she’s not sure counseling is for her. Willow says she felt that way too, before giving up her baby. The group, and meeting Michael, made a huge difference. Working through it, empowered her, and might do the same for Sasha. She tells Sasha, when she feels embarrassed or ashamed, remember that she helped save a little boy from an evil monster. There’s nothing more important. Sasha says she’ll hold onto that, and Willow says she should.

Carly tells Michael, she was justified in withholding the truth – it was in Wiley’s best interest – but actions have consequences, and she knows that. He and Willow were friends, and watching them lean on each other was a beautiful thing. She gets it. They started as friends, but she senses it’s more than that. Michael says what he and Willow are, is between them, and no one else.

Sam tells Jason, Morgan’s death was devastating, and he says he can’t imagine. She says it put an end to all the lies they told themselves about this life being safe. She thinks that’s when it hit her. She was standing for what felt like an eternity in The Floating Rib parking lot, thinking she should have known better. She should have learned from what happened to Morgan. No matter what the promises, the good intentions, and the guards, it’s not enough. Nothing can ever ease the pain of losing a child because of the choices you’ve made. They have a second chance. Danny is alive, and she’s learned her lesson. She’s also Scout’s mother, and she has to do what’s best for them. He says he wants that too, and she says she knows he does. With tears in his eyes, he says, if what’s best is for him to leave, he will. He’ll hate it and miss her like crazy, but he will.

Martin tells Diane and Sonny, his brother got in touch with him. He wanted to reconnect, but Martin said, no. Diane asks, why? and Martin says his brother is a complicated person; he’s angry. He was wild when he was young, and now he’s an alleged drug kingpin. He wanted no part of that. Then, their mother fell ill, and went through her medical insurance quickly. The level of care she needed would have bankrupted him, so he contacted Cyrus. To his credit, Cyrus answered, and has been paying her expenses ever since. How he makes his money, Martin doesn’t know, and doesn’t want to know. Diane says they’ll be vetting his story, and Martin says, it’s the truth. May he go? Sonny nods, and he tells them, have a good evening. He leaves, and Diane says, well, that was informative. Sonny says, it’s a start. He’s still got to find out what else Cyrus is hiding.

Epiphany shows up at Jordan’s apartment, and asks if she’s alone. Jordan says she is, and asks, what’s going on? Epiphany says Jordan has a problem. The wheels are coming off her cover-up. If she’s not careful, someone is going to figure out Taggert is alive.

Willow says she’s got to go home, and Sasha says her too. It was good to see her. Willow leaves, and Sasha contemplates their conversation.  

Michael says, talking about how they got there won’t change where they are. He and Willow have been married for months, and they went to living directly as co-parents. Carly says, that’s huge, and he says, every decision was based on a lie. They were bonding and getting closer… because isn’t the right word. It lot had to do with Willow thinking Chase didn’t love her anymore, but it turns out the opposite was true. Chase loved her so much, he let her go; let her hate him so Wiley would be safe. It’s so much more confusing right now. She says she knows she said she’d stay out of it, but she has a piece of advice; don’t push it in either direction. They’re all good people with good intentions. Take the time to sort through who they are now, and how they feel now. He says, and where to go next?

Sam asks if Jason remembers when they first met at the PCPD. They were in handcuffs. He says, how could he forget? and she says, at that moment, she had no idea where their lives would take them. that they’d actually fall in love and have kids. Their theme music starts to play, which has been like waiting for the other shoe to fall during this entire conversation. Jason says, now that they do, they have to come first, and Sam says, they just have to. He says he sees how much it weighs on her. The compromises, the restrictions, the secrets. Danny and Scout shouldn’t have to accept those limitations as normal. They shouldn’t have to deal with the fallout of his choices, and neither should she.

Laura shoots, and Curtis comes in. He says, target practice? and she says, Cyrus was in the booth next to her. It took everything in her not to take a shot at him. He says he’s glad she didn’t. He’d hate for her to get locked up for the likes of trash like that. She tells him that she was rewarded for sharing. Cyrus wouldn’t stop talking about Lulu, and volunteered that he knew of some good long-term care facilities in Vermont. Does he think Cyrus moved Florence to one of them?

Epiphany tells Jordan, Trina has been asking questions. Why couldn’t they save her father? Why did they take him away so fast? Jordan says, that doesn’t mean Trina believes he’s alive, but Epiphany says, she suspects. It wouldn’t be a huge deal, but Taggert is hard to miss. He’s been lurking at GH, and who knows where else. Jordan asks what she’s saying, and Epiphany says, he’s been shadowing Trina and Portia. She caught him in scrubs at the hospital. Jordan says she didn’t even know he was back in town.

Jason says he doesn’t want Sam or the kids to live in fear, and he wouldn’t want to put them in danger. She says just because they don’t want something, doesn’t mean it won’t happen. They’ve learned that the hard way, a lot actually. She never wanted to think… He says, they’ve been through so much to be together, it’s not as simple as him walking away. She says, it’s not simple, but it’s something they have to do. Sonny calls, but Jason doesn’t answer. He says he’s thankful for every day they’ve had together. Danny is his son, and the time he’s spent with Danny and Scout… She gave him a family. He didn’t even know if that was in the cards for him. He doesn’t want this be over, but she says, they have no choice anymore.

Jason says, it feels wrong to walk out on her and the kids, but Sam says, it’s not wrong. She’s asking if he’ll go. His phone rings, and she says, Sonny? He says, yeah, but he’ll call back. Sam picks up the phone, and he says, don’t answer, but she does. She tells Sonny, he’s right here, and hands Jason the phone. He tells Sonny that he’s made arrangements; everything is ready. Are they still meeting at his place? Sonny says he’s at the MetroCourt, and tells Jason to pick him up there. Sam says, he has to go? and Jason says, yeah, he has to go. The music swells, and Sam cries. Jason says loves her and always will, and she says she loves him so much that it hurts, but they’re doing this for their kids. That’s something. He says, that’s everything, and walks out without turning around. Sam sits with her head in her hands crying. Outside, Jason leans on the door.

Willow comes home, and asks if Michael is working. He says he’s tying up some loose ends before he goes to bed. What’s going on? She says she just ran into Sasha in the park, and he asks how she is. Willow says, honestly? She seems better than she has in a while. He says, good. They both try to talk at once, and he tells her to go first. She says, things are really confusing right now for the both of them, and he says, a little bit. She says, whatever happens, they were friends from the start. She doesn’t want that to change. He promises it won’t. He’s not going anywhere.  

Jordan wonders what Taggert is thinking, and Epiphany says, he’s thinking he’s a father, desperate to protect his daughter. She blames Cyrus; his influence is growing. Jordan says, it’s not about blame; it’s about restraint. She needs to send Taggert away before it all falls apart, taking her marriage with it.   

Carly tells Sonny, her mind is blown. Cyrus is Martin’s brother? Sonny says it surprised him too, and she says, that’s it? He’s dropping this in her lap like a bomb (bad choice of words, Carly), and he’s going out of town on business? He says he’s following intel from Martin about Julian. Martin had information that’s not good news, but he has no idea how deep his brother is in with Julian. Cyrus walks in, and says he hopes they’re enjoying a peaceful evening. Sonny says he was about to leave, and Cyrus asks Sonny to accept his condolences about his cousin. He knows the loss must be felt deeply. It’s tragic, and he hopes no misunderstandings result from it. Sonny says, no misunderstandings. When he finds out who’s responsible for the situation, he’ll have all his facts straight.

Curtis suggest he upload the records from the medical company, and see if they ship to Vermont. Laura says, it’s a long shot. At the same time, Cyrus was oddly sincere. He says, that is odd, and she says, maybe he was so caught up, he revealed more than he intended. Curtis looks on his phone, and says, the Mexican company only ships to one facility in Vermont; Mountain Landing Long Term Care. He asks if she’s up for a road trip, and she says, Florence Gray, here they come.

Tomorrow, Olivia says she’s got her sights on Alexis, Scotty says they’re going to see the doctor, Tracy tells Monica it’s something not so wonderful, and Anna asks Dante what happened in Geneva.

The Real Housewives of Orange County

Shannon opened the episode with saying, a week ago everything was fine, and they were in Palm Springs. The text told us production closed, and the women filmed themselves. Gina said, if the sun would come out, it wouldn’t feel so much like Armageddon, and it’s possibly the first time she and I have agreed, since it’s been raining here since the fall of 2019.

Quarantine day 4. Shannon and Braunwyn video chatted and talked about appearance being the worst thing, and showing their ever-growing roots. Elizabeth was helping animals, and in her interview, said she had a sincere passion for them because they’re helpless. It’s how she felt in her divorce, and she was hoping to heal the people who adopted rescues as well. Braunwyn said she was doing good. She couldn’t go to meetings, but found a sponsor.

Day 8. Braunwyn had never used a washing machine before. It was the first time she’d been without a housekeeper since she was in high school. I couldn’t even fathom that. In her interview, she said she lived in a smart house, which was great unless you’re not a smart person. She had kitchen hours posted, and said because of her OCD tendencies, the house was spotless. She was up at 6, and in bed at 10, cleaning the whole time. In her interview, she said she was trapped in the house with seven kids, and things that had been kind of annoying were now really annoying.

Day 11. Kelly and Emily met in the park. Emily said, all she knew was that she needed to take her kids somewhere, and drop them off. In her interview, she said, quarantine in Orange County was like upscale house arrest. Her kids were addicted to her, and regardless of how big her house was, she couldn’t get rid of them. Braunwyn joined Kelly and Emily, and said she was over everything. Kelly was going to NYC to see Rick, and in her interview, said it was absurd that the economy was shutting down, and she thought the virus was being blown out of proportion. In Braunwyn’s interview, she said for her, to leave her kids wasn’t an option. She couldn’t understand the risk for a booty call. Braunwyn said she’d seen Elizabeth posting on Instagram that they were lying about the numbers, and they hadn’t done this with the AIDS epidemic. In Emily’s interview, she said she’s no doctor, but she knows AIDS comes from sexual activity. Braunwyn said Elizabeth told a different story to everyone about her situation. Braunwyn didn’t want to be fake, and wanted them to be real women who were open and honest, and supported each other. Emily wondered if Elizabeth and Jimmy were sexually distancing.

Day 12. Shannon said not everyone was following the rules. In her interview, she said John’s son came to stay. She told him that she had a list of rules, and once he came to the house, he couldn’t leave. He decided to leave, and John went too. We saw a clip of Shannon crying about this on Instagram. Kelly filmed herself at LaGuardia Airport, while on her way to see Rick. She said she was scared. She was washing her hands, and staying away from people, but it seemed inevitable.

Day 14. Kelly was in Times Square with Rick, and showed us there was no on the streets. She said it was bizarre, and got a hot dog from a food cart. Rick said she’d been craving one for six months. I totally understood this, since I don’t normally eat hot dogs, but whenever I’m in the city, I’m always compelled to get one from a cart. In Kelly’s interview, she said she wasn’t scared, but she was cautious. She wasn’t letting the virus take her down. She and Rick worked out, and she told him that she couldn’t do pushups because she had fake boobs. He pretended to be shocked at this revelation. In her interview, she said Jolie was taken care of, but Rick was alone. Nothing was going to separate her and her man. Rick gave her a pedicure, which I thought was super boyfriend nice. 

Day 18. Emily said she knew she lived in an Orange County bubble, and could only imagine what other people were going through trying to pay the bills. It was a devastating time. She filmed Shane vacuuming, and said this had never been seen before. In her interview, she said she’d been afraid quarantine would be detrimental to their relationship. Shane still wasn’t getting more sex, since she was tired from no breaks with the kids. Last year, they were fighting in front of the kids, but even though this was a stressful weird time, their marriage was solid, and it was beneficial to the children. Shane continued to clean, and Emily told him it was sexy.

Day 20. Braunwyn said she lived in the real world, but Sean lived where everything was fine. She explained that when she’s unhappy, she lashes out, because it’s easier to project it. Sometimes it felt like she was the only grown-up in the house, and she was so tired. Shannon called Gina, who showed off her new mom haircut. In Gina’s interview, she said salon workers weren’t considered essential, but should be for her. The second time we agreed. Shannon said John was back in the house, and in her interview, Gina said Shannon had called her, and it sounded like she was soused. She was hysterical, and said she’d had a fight with John. Gina thought they were going to break up. Shannon said she’d been beyond devastated. She’d told John that he could stay with his son or her, but he couldn’t do both. He showed up, and was very emotional. He said he understood now. Gina told Shannon, if He was compromised, she has it already, but he shouldn’t go back and forth. Shannon needed to be protected. In her interview, Gina said she was shocked Shannon let him back in. She put her health at risk to hold on to a relationship. She said Shannon was good at following rules, and Shannon agreed. The hunt for toilet paper and paper towels was on, and Kelly told Rick, next time, they were investing in a bidet. Emily hid toilet paper on her back porch for Gina.

Day 24. Kelly called Jolie from NYC, and asked why she was being difficult. Why wasn’t Jolie talking to her? Jolie said quarantine sucked, which about summed it up for all of us. In Kelly’s interview, she said when she came to NYC, she’d intended to just stay for the week Michael had Jolie. She felt guilty, but she got stuck. She didn’t know it was going to be the epicenter; it wasn’t her fault. Jolie said people were freaking out, and Kelly said the virus had been around since December. Jolie insisted it hadn’t, and in her interview, Kelly said, teenagers think they know everything. She asked about school, and Jolie showed Kelly all the homework she’d been given. Kelly said she missed her daughter.

Day 31. Elizabeth pointed out that the liquor store was fully stocked. She said they weren’t drinking since they were trying to be healthy, not drunk and miserable. In Elizabeth’s interview, she said she wasn’t sure if the virus was manmade by Big Pharma, or natural from a monkey, but having to stay home was making her nuts. She wanted to cry, since the lawyers were postponing the divorce. She couldn’t be free or live her life how she wanted to. In her interview, she said she’d thought money would make her happy, but she was realizing it might not make her as happy as she’d thought it would.

Day 39. Braunwyn said she put on makeup and earrings to go one a car ride. When this was over, it was going to be insane. In her interview, she said she’d been angry. Online meetings weren’t the thing she needed. Sean belittled her over not being able to get the vacuum charger to work. She’d been working hard, and she lost it, and smacked him. She’d hit Sean a couple of times, but it was nothing like what happened in Aspen. She hit him hard across the face. She’d wanted to drink, and was lashing out. Looking back, it was a side of her that he’d never seen. She felt trapped. Trapped in her house, trapped in her marriage, trapped emotionally and physically. Everything that was happening was indicative of the headspace she was in. She’d always put a happy spin on her marriage, but things happened she didn’t talk about. She was 89 days sober, and hadn’t wanted a drink in a while. If she had it in the house, she’d drink it. She wasn’t okay.

I suddenly notice, in the part of the credits where they hold out the orange, they’re wearing masks.

May 1. Elizabeth told us, they could do what they wanted now. We saw her at the beach, and people out shopping and in the park. Gina was shopping in Home Depot, and said everyone had the same idea to work on their house. Get it done. Braunwyn, Emily, Shannon, and Kelly went to visit Shannon, who said in her interview, she needed human contact. Maybe not with Kelly, who’d been all over the place. She might need to stand ten feet away from Kelly. Shannon told the women that Tamra had responded to Gina on social media, saying she’d had a good time with Gina, and then Gina canceled coming over today. In Shannon’s interview, she said she didn’t have a friendship with Tamra anymore, but Tamra trashed her and Kelly on a regular basis. Shannon told the group that Kelly said when Tamra came after her on social media, don’t say anything. In her interview, Shannon said she’d sacrificed other friendships to devote time to Tamra. We flashed back to some moments when Tamra was needy, and Shannon said now she had a void in her life. She was a little lost. Shannon told them that Elizabeth had said she’d been belligerent, and screamed at Jimmy, so he left Palm Springs, but he left because he had to go to work early. In her interview, Shannon said, Jimmy had a job to get to. If Elizabeth isn’t telling the truth about this, maybe she’s not telling the truth about a bunch of other things. In Emily’s interview, she said Shannon was like the Regina George of this part of Orange County. You do the dirty work, and she’ll look at it, but she’s got clean hands. In Kelly’s interview, she said Shannon was the puppet-master this time. She thought Elizabeth told half-truths because she was insecure. She was like a blowfish, making herself bigger than she was, but she was a good person, trying to do the right thing. She called the women a bunch of effing Nancy Drews.

Gina called Braunwyn, who said there were no AA meetings. Braunwyn told Gina that Elizabeth said she was alone, but one of her Instagram posts showed her with a friend at her house, and they were drinking. She thought Elizabeth didn’t have the money she said she did. It was public record that she’d taken out loans against her homes for legal fees. In Emily’s interview, she said she’d be pissed if people were digging up documents on her, and telling others, but she’d be happy to read over them, and give her legal opinion.

Apparently, Emily adopted two kittens during the pandemic, who  tumbled around on the table while the kids were eating. Elizabeth called Gina, and Gina said she anticipated more divorces because of covid. Elizabeth said she and her ex went to let’s settle this. She wondered what was wrong with her that she wanted to win. In her interview, she said covid changed her perspective. She didn’t need to buy stuff to make herself happy. She knew it was because of where she came from, but she lost sight of that when she had the money. Braunwyn went over to Shannon’s house, and they talked about quarantine. Shannon told Braunwyn that she cooked up storm, ate like a pig, and drank everything, and she had nothing show for it. Elizabeth told Kelly that she thought it would be cool for them to go on a girls trip to Arrowhead. Everyone would get tested before they go. Braunwyn talked to Shannon about the impending trip, and Shannon asked who was invited. Was Kelly invited? Shannon said, kind of ish, and Shannon wondered why Elizabeth was telling people she’d been belligerent to Jimmy. Braunwyn said she didn’t know Elizabeth, but everything Elizabeth told her wasn’t real. She wanted to get to know Elizabeth. Honesty was the foundation of friendship, but if Elizabeth couldn’t be honest, how could they be friends? Elizabeth said Gina was harsh on her in Palm Springs, and we flashed back to Gina saying the divorce was going to kill Elizabeth. Gina said she understood what Elizabeth was going through; she didn’t know how to shut off advocating for her ex. Braunwyn told Shannon that Elizabeth was telling different versions of the personal stuff she was sharing. She felt like she couldn’t get to know Elizabeth if she was going to be inconsistent. She should just lay it out, and everyone would accept it. Shannon said she heard the divorce was settled, and Braunwyn said she got it; she lied about stuff too. We flashed back to her being called out, and in Shannon’s interview, she said she had no idea what was going on. Elizabeth laughed everything off, and couldn’t give a straight answer, or gave a different one every time. Gina told Elizabeth that she was supposed to get together with Shannon, but she bailed. In her interview, Elizabeth said she was used to women who wanted to discredit her. It had happened her whole life, and she was used to women like Braunwyn and Shannon. But when they start digging about her personally, she gets nervous. There was some dysfunction in her past she didn’t want out there. I’m intrigued.

May 25. We saw clips from protests in Minneapolis, NYC, Los Angeles, and Laguna Beach. Elizabeth said it was so sad. She’d thought as a society, we would have moved forward, but we’d taken 200 steps back. Gizelle (The Real Housewives of Potomac) and Gina, who are friends outside the franchise, talked virtually, and Gina said, the more conversation, the better. If they didn’t talk, nothing would change, and they had an obligation. We saw tweets from various cast members about Black Lives Matter.

May 31. In Braunwyn’s interview, she said, watching George Floyd being murdered changed everything. She’s had no excuse to tune this out for 42 years, and she was sorry. She wondered what she could do now. Orange County was very conservative and white; take your tax breaks and shut up. She said they had a duty to use their white privilege to help everyone. Her kids had a chance to make changes in the world. Standing up for what’s right should be ingrained on their psyche, and they should pass it on to their children.

Things started opening up, and Braunwyn got together with her friend Shari. Elizabeth went to get Botox, so she could wipe the divorce off her face. Kelly called Shannon, who was nearly hysterical. She said Stella had a cold, and they took a swab. She’d tested positive. While they were there, Shannon found out she had a slight fever, and she’d had a sore throat. Everyone was getting tested. She was so careful; she didn’t understand. In Shannon’s interview, she said she told the girls they needed to be safe, and follow the rules, but the twins went to a party where there were no masks, and they were hugging people. Kelly said, oh my God.

Next time, a trip to Arrowhead, Braunwyn wonders if she and Sean should stay together, and Shane gets very sick.  

The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City

They backtracked a little, and showed Jen explaining herself at Mary’s luncheon. Meredith said she appreciated Jen’s apology, and she was hopeful. Mary said Jen’s words could be deadly, and Jen told Mary that she just said what everyone was thinking. Mary didn’t agree, and when Jen peppered her response with explicatives, Mary told Jen not to curse at her. She asked why Jen was so angry, and Jen said she tried to open herself up. Mary said she never wanted to talk to Jen again, and told her to go. Heather said Mary had invited them to get to know them better. In Whitney’s interview, she said she didn’t know how they got there, when it had been all good. Jen told Mary to quit making faces at her, and Mary asked if Jen was going to whip her butt. Jen told Mary not to have a party and tell people to open themselves up, and walked out. In her interview, Heather said this had to stop. At this point the score was settled. Forgive and move on. In Lisa’s interview, she said she cringed when Jen said Mary was a grandpa f***er. Now Mary thinks that’s what they all think, and that’s not true. In Jen’s interview, she said she was excited to meet Mary. She was another minority female who’d grown up in Utah, and she thought they’d be alike. It was a let-down; she expected more. Mary said she didn’t want to be cursed at, and Lisa said it was hurtful because there had been no apology. Mary said Jen should have acknowledged her hurt. Meredith said there was no reason to speak disrespectfully to anyone. Heather brought Jen back to the table, and said she didn’t think this was Mary’s intention for the lunch. Respectfully and calmly. In Jen’s interview, she said she was going to take Heather’s advice, rise above, and not react. She told Mary that she wouldn’t be there if she didn’t care. It was hard for her to open up, and when she did, Mary took her legs out from under her. Mary said that wasn’t her purpose, and Heather said she seemed dismissive and hypocritical. Mary didn’t like this comment too much, and said Heather was two-faced. Whitney said Jen was just trying to explain, and help them understand why she reacts the way she does, but Mary couldn’t accept it. Mary called Jen a hoodlum, and in Jen’s interview, she said she didn’t use the words hoodlum or ghetto. They were always used in a derogatory way to make people feel less than. Mary had told her that if she goes to the 7-11 and sees Black people, she goes elsewhere. She wondered who Mary was. Jen told them, she tried, and split.

Mary’s housekeeper Charlinda made some mad beatbox sounds in the kitchen. Meredith told Brooks that Jen’s bottom line was that she only got upset because she cared. In Heather’s interview, she said her ex, Billy, wanted their kids to have a mom who was available 24/7, and provided well for them. Her daughter had been dating the same boy for two years, but most Mormons didn’t let their kids go past a second date with the same person. It could lead to a relationship, which would lead to sex, but she wanted her kids to be carefree, young and in love. She didn’t want the divorce to affect her daughters, but they weren’t as connected to being Mormon anymore. Meredith picked Seth up at the airport. In her interview, she said he’d been going between Ohio and Chicago, and she hadn’t seen him in a few weeks. Things were tense and volatile last time, and she was hoping it would be smoother. Seth said he loved Ohio; he was a blue collar guy. He asked if she was going to live with him in Ohio, but she said they weren’t living in Ohio. He asked if where she lived was more important than who she lived with, and she said he’d uprooted the family every couple of years. In her interview, she said they’d gone from Toronto to Chicago, then Seth commuted to Dallas, and they moved to Park City. It caused hostility in the marriage, and when her oldest graduated, they were so busy moving, she didn’t emotional digest it. Asking her to move was a trigger.

Mary told Robert Sr. that Jen kept picking on her, and she didn’t know why. Jen told Sharrieff about the luncheon, and they each told their story to their spouses, putting their own spin on it. Jen focused on the 7-11 thing, but I was surprised any of them would be going to a 7-11 period. Sharrieff said there were Black folks who didn’t like other Black folks, and Jen said she’d kill Mary with kindness, which I expect will last all of three seconds. Mary told Robert about Jen’s grandfather comment, and said it wasn’t like he was a blood relative. She said it was her against them. Sharrieff told Jen it wasn’t about her, and don’t take personally. Robert told Mary it was pagan jealousy. In Mary’s interview, she said Jen’s behavior was toxic. She was like a bad apple on a tree, and Mary was done.

Whitney went to see her brother Will, and in her interview, said they were best friends from the time they could walk. They did a jujitsu workout, and seemed very sweet together. I actually think they may be nice people, which is like finding a unicorn on these shows. Will told Whitney that she had the talent, and he needed to get her in there full-time. She asked if he’d heard from their dad, but he said no. She told him their dad was committed to sober living. He’d gone to a 30 day rehab, and was supposed to do a 5 days a week program, but when he completed rehab, he took off to California. He had withdrawal so bad, he was on the verge of a relapse. It was easy to be sober in rehab. Whitney said he was going back, but this time, he was paying for it. Will said Whitney was the gatekeeper, and in her interview, Whitney said their parents both had children from other marriages, and when they divorced, it was mom’s kids against dad’s kids. When she decided to support her father, it made the divide wider. He wasn’t Will’s biological father, so she appreciated the support.

Lisa had a birthday party for son Henry at a bowling alley. In Lisa’s interview, she said in the Mormon church, marriage was not only sacred, but for eternity. You picked a partner, and chose to make the best of it. It had worked for her and her husband because they had the same core values. They had a core love of God, a core love of Jesus, and a core love of family and building something together. The eternal church, and the eternal family.   

In Whitney’s interview, she said her dad realized he needed structure that she couldn’t provide. He was going back to rehab for 90 days. It had been a struggle, and took its toll on her emotionally, financially, and spiritually. But it was the first time he was being accountable and responsible. He was choosing to go. In the car, she told him that it was the best she’d felt about the situation ever. I think if he’d do something about his Herman Munster haircut, he might feel a little better about himself. We saw him getting checked in, and Whitney hoped he could let go of past bad choices. It was crucial to his sobriety.

Seth asked Meredith what the plan was, but she said she didn’t have one. As much as she wanted him there, she thought they needed room. He said he’d give her room, and  maybe with him out of the picture, it would help her know what she wanted. In her interview, Meredith said you had to work things out individually in order to come back together as a happy couple. Seth said he didn’t want to separate after 25 years.

Mary met with Heather, who thought she could be friends with both Jen and Mary, and also be loyal to both of them. Mary said Jen was angry with her because she resented not being at the top. She explained how her grandmother had wanted her to take her place, and Heather said people didn’t get that Mary’s grandfather wasn’t a blood relative. Mary started crying, and said she hadn’t wanted to marry him, but she trusted her grandmother. In Mary’s interview, she said it took her two years to adjust. She told Heather that she chose what God told her to do. In Heather’s interview, she said she felt deep empathy. She understood about marrying for faith over love, but Mary’s situation was different. Heather told Mary that there was more that brought her and Jen together than tore them apart, but Mary said Jen burnt the bridge. She was done.

Next time, body shots, Whitney on the pole, Meredith says she runs Sundance, and Brooks has a show during Salt Lake City Fashion Week.

🐴 The Real Housewives of Dallas returns for a new season on January 5^th. Minus one LeeAnne, and plus a new Wife.

🥊 Gonna Fly Now…

Is it the end of what used to be called a week yet? I don’t know how, but I’m not ready for the holidays any more than I usually am either. But even if you’re floundering as I am, stay safe, stay on the nice list, and stay using whatever privilege you have to help whoever you can.