Category Archives: real housewives

Apr25

April 24, 2020 – Paulina’s Birthday Luau, Sonny Looks Back, Flashback Padding, Soap Story, Back With Vengeance, AMC Scares, a Goodbye, Open Secrets, Quarentinial Quotes & Sail

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

Shahs of Sunset

Reza tells us, when Persians are on vacation, and shelling out cash, they don’t like wasting a moment of time. Except Destiney. Everyone is in the kitchen early for breakfast, but Destiney is still sleeping. Mike asks who’s doing surfing and who’s doing the bees. He puts tattoos on everyone. In Mike’s interview, he says he thought Paulina might have a hard time, bringing the group along on her birthday trip, but they’ve been awesome. He’s helped by acting like a camp counselor. In MJ’s interview, she says she loves Mike, but he can be controlling, and the girls he’s with become subservient. We see a clip from the reunion where Mike didn’t want Jessica to come out, even though she wanted to speak her piece. MJ says, Mike is happy, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have the same tendencies to be the guy he’s been for the last 35 years. GG asks where Destiney is.

MJ video chats with Tommy, and looks at baby Shams. She tells him, yesterday was hard. She felt homesick. She asks if Shams has changed, and Tommy jokes that he’s smoking cigarettes now. MJ shows him a lizard on a nearby rock. She says she and Reza had a nice, long conversation. He said his intention was to drop everything. She asks if Reza’s attorney has communicated with Tommy’s, but he says, no. In MJ’s interview, she says she’s going to be there for the man she married, and has a family with. She wants Reza to realize he’s wrong, and drop the charges. She says she’s going to try and have one nice day.

GG wants to do rosé all day, and wonders how MJ is going to surf in her thong bathing suit. Paulina says she’s going surfing, rather than joining Mike on what I find out later is a trip to a bee farm. MJ says Paulina is finally thinking clearly. In GG’s interview, she says, it’s been a while, and she’s having floating thoughts. In the car on the way to the farm, she asks the guys – Nema, Reza, and Mike – questions about sex. In Nema’s interview, he says he and GG haven’t had anything physical, although they’ve had moments that were close. We flash back to the almost-kiss on the ski trip. GG allows him to kiss her, although it’s nothing passionate. In her interview, GG says, less teeth and more lips would have been helpful. Nema says, it was a preview.

Destiney explains that her sister was stung by a bee while doing a handstand in the pool, so she’d rather go surfing. Shervin, MJ, Paulina, and Sara are also in the surfing group. An instructor shows MJ how to stay on a surfboard. She says she has an aggressive thong, which sounds painful, but she masters the stance. Although since the surfboard is on land, it’s kind of meaningless, since the ground isn’t rolling around beneath her. Destiney and Paulina just hang out on their surfboards in the sun. In Destiney’s interview, she says it’s like how Persians go to a pool party, but they don’t go in the pool. It’s same with the beach. It might ruin your hair.

At the bee farm, bee guy Joe gives the other group lots of bee information. GG tells him about seeing a shaman who said her spirit animal was a bee. She used to sting people, but now she wants to stay alive, Reza gets the complete protection suit, but the rest wear variations of gear, and GG just wears the hat and gloves. Reza says, a bitch lost 50 pounds, but the suit is still snug. GG says she knows her homies won’t sting her. Want some honey, honey? True story. The only time I was ever stung by a bee was when I was around four, and I tried to pet it. I love bees. Bee guy Joe takes out the shelves from the hive that are covered with bees. Nema thinks he and GG are two bees who need to pollinate, and Mike says he’s sweating like a whore in church.

The surfing group gets back first, and MJ wants a shot of Patron, even though she doesn’t like Patron. I don’t like it either, but that’s why I don’t drink it. MJ tells Paulina, she knows how it feels to be under a strict regime. It takes her back to her Persian boyfriend. She’s glad she married a white boy. Shervin shakes his head.

Bee guy Joe demonstrates how to make a candle, and the group gets sheets of beeswax to make one. Reza says, they’re expensive; make three or four. Paulina texts Mike, MJ is effing foul. In Mike’s interview, he says, MJ thrives off antagonizing people. It’s like a drug for her to poke at people. It gets her high. Mike says he has to go. He has to see WTF is happening.

Mike stomps in, asking, what happened? and Paulina says, MJ told her that she and Mike remind her of when she used to date Persian men. He says, WTF? and Shervin says, it doesn’t end there. Reza tells MJ that Paulina is upset. Something MJ said hurt, offended, or disrespected Paulina. In her interview, MJ says she’s shellshocked. She thought they were bullsh*tting, having fun, and bonding over men. Paulina tells Mike that MJ said she was glad she married a white guy, and Mike was so controlling. He tells her that he’s sorry she had to go through this. In his interview, he says he vowed never to be like that again, and his prayers were answered with Paulina. He says, MJ needs to know not to f*ck with him and his girl. He tells MJ that there’s been a lot of sh*t talk behind people’s backs, and he doesn’t like his girlfriend being upset. MJ says she loves Paulina; why is she upset? He says MJ told her that she was sorry Paulina was dating a Persian guy. She says she didn’t say that, and Mike says Paulina heard it that way. MJ says the Persian relationship situation reminded her that she married an American, and it’s very different. She didn’t say anything insulting, but she’s sorry Paulina heard it that way. In GG’s interview, she says, MJ is being her authentic self, someone who damages people. GG wants no more to do with it. Mike asks MJ what she’s thinking. Does she not like Paulina? MJ says Paulina is like a breath of fresh air. In Reza’s interview, he wonders why MJ would say what she did when she’s in a huge group, mostly of Persian men. MJ says, it’s a fact that American men are different, and Mike said she was pointing out that things are better. Trying to flip it, MJ asks why it has to be a comparison, and Mike says, she’s effed up. She tells him, she didn’t say he was controlling, which is exactly what she said. GG doesn’t understand how anyone can insert themselves in someone else’s life. Mike says, stop engaging. GG leaves, while suggesting MJ get her own life. Mike admits he’s opinionated, but says he’s not controlling. MJ says if they don’t want her there, don’t invite her, and Mike says he wants her to act right. She asks what she’s doing wrong, and when he wants to apologize, hopefully she’ll be open to it. Destiney says Persian men are controlling, but she loves them. Shervin tells Reza, Adam called and asked if he could fart.

GG goes outside and sits with Paulina. She says she’s sorry she wasn’t there earlier. They thought Paulina was having a great time, then all of a sudden, Mike was raging, In GG’s interview, she says, it’s confusing, having a friend like MJ. They’ve had some amazing times – we flash back to some of those – but on the other side, MJ preyed on her vulnerability – we flash back to MJ and Reza blindsiding GG with Shalom’s ex-wife. GG says they’re talking about the woman who single-handedly sh*t on everyone.

MJ tells Reza, she said Mike was strict, and he still continues to pop off. Let her cool off. Reza says, it’s Paulina’s birthday; talk to her. MJ goes out, joining Paulina and GG. GG is telling Paulina, it doesn’t make sense, and it’s not right. What credibility does MJ have? MJ says she’s sorry if she upset Paulina when she said Mike was strict. They haven’t hung out that much, and Paulina seems easy-going, so MJ let her guard down and was talking sh*t. GG slips away, and MJ sits down. She tells Paulina, she says things that sound harsh, but her intention isn’t from a bad place. Paulina says, hearing that, she wondered what going on. She felt the drama between MJ and Reza, and wondered if she was next. In MJ’s interview, she says she’s realizing, before Paulina has a chance to get to know her, she’s been told bullsh*t. Paulina says it means a lot to her for MJ to explain herself.

Nema says Paulina is adjusting to the group, and how everyone is in everyone’s sh*t. He doesn’t consider it malicious, but just thoughtless. In Destiney’s interview, she says MJ is sh*tty with her comments sometimes, and always comes back with she didn’t mean it, and how much she cares. It makes you think you’re crazy. She’s not sorry; it’s a pattern. Mike says, it’s time for the luau dinner.

A conch is blown. It reminds me of Lord of the Flies, which isn’t far off. A pig has been roasted, and there are hula dancers with a three-piece accompaniment. They toast to a beautiful evening together. MJ hugs Paulina. In Mike’s interview, he says, even though he appreciates MJ’s apology – it’s big of her – it’s more of a concern what a persona says behind his back than in front of his face. In Reza’s interview, he wonders, WTF were they thinking? Who’s eating the pig? He’s half Muslim and half Jewish. He doesn’t screw with swine. I didn’t even think of that. GG says, the pig is scary. I was at an event that included a pig roast once, and they’re gross, but the smell is incredible. It tasted good too, but by the time I got there, almost nothing but the head was left, so all I got was a taste.

Paulina thanks everyone for coming on the trip her love planned for her. Nema says, in 2018, Mike was a pain in the ass, but the 2019 Mike is amazing. Reza says Paulina made someone they loved better, and they toast to her. A beautiful cake comes out, almost like a small wedding cake, decorated with real flowers. The group sings Happy Birthday in Persian. Mike hopes all her wishes come true. Fire dancers come out, and GG ducks behind the table. In her interview, she says she has Puff the Magic Dragon with her, and she doesn’t want to die. They drink some more.

Nema compliments GG, and Mike says they want to see a kiss. Nema says they saw that once today, and the guys all make fun of him. Mike asks GG to show them again, and she says she’s definitely drunk enough. Nema tells her, come on, and she says that’s probably why he’s still single; he has no swag. Mike asks if he ever smashed Erica, and Nema says, he has a major emotional attachment to her. He had no sense of family growing up, and has a hard time letting go. In Nema’s interview, he says, not having a key maternal figure, he doesn’t process relationships the same way, and that’s why it’s hard to let go of Erica. Nema says Erica saved him after his divorce, at his lowest point. He doesn’t like their disrespectful comments. He goes inside.

GG says, Nema needed a break from the conversation. It didn’t work out, and it’s sensitive for him. Why is it fair grounds [sic] to talk about it? She goes inside and sits with Nema, but sees a roach walking across the floor, and freaks out. MJ is on her way in, and GG tries to stop her, telling her about the bug. In his interview, Nema says he knows GG likes to get high, but she’s a little crazy. Who knows what she sees? He swipes the bug outside with his foot, and she sees another one on the ceiling. She’s worried his friend is going to come for her now.

Nema tells GG, any criticism of Erica is difficult for him. GG says he should marry Erica, and he says she wants and deserves tradition, but he can’t give her what she wants. GG asks, why? and he says, it’s awkward to say that he loves her, but he’s attracted to other women. GG says he needs someone who understands that he wants to have fun. If her brain could be put into Erica, it would be perfect. Nema says he would marry her, and GG says then he’d have his cake and eat it too. He asks which she is, the cake or what he’s eating? She says she’s always an option. Paulina interrupts, and says she has a ritual she wants them to do. Nema says, saved by the bell, and GG says, he was saved by the bell. She asks what flavor cake she’d be, and Nema says, red velvet. GG thinks she’d be devil’s food.

Back at the table, Paulina says, for her birthday, she wishes they could have deep friendships, but they’re afraid to be honest. She wants them to write down, anonymously, how they feel. In his interview, Reza says, bad idea, and Paulina tells them, write down what you’re scared to say. In Reza’s interview, he says, give them a slice of coconut cake, and be done with it. Where’s the hula dancer? Where’s Don Ho when you need him? This is a bad, bad idea. Paulina says they’re going to burn them afterward. They move to the fire, and Paulina reads, Nema is passive/aggressive. The next one says, Shervin is too buff. He needs to eat a salad some time. Shervin says, it’s in crayon. It’s Mike. Mike starts to laugh. Paulina reads another one that says, if I hadn’t been vulnerable, I wouldn’t have hurt the people I love. They all seem to know it’s Reza, and she reads, I don’t like to see people who thrive on people in pain. She picks up another, and says, Sara needs to clear out the skeletons in her closet. Sara says, wow, and Mike says, that’s been the chatter amongst the group behind her back. We flash back to Sara talking to Reza about her time with R. Kelly. Sara says, none of them would know what to expect; what it’s like seeing your ex on the news. It’s a ridiculous statement. Destiney says she didn’t write it, but she’s glad someone did. GG insists on switching seats, so Destiney and Sara can talk it out. In Destiney’s interview, she says, even though she and Sam are no longer dating, there’s been some tough sh*t with the R. Kelly situation. She’d never want to make another woman feel less than. They clasp hands. Sara says she feels like everyone is on the hunt. It’s the worst thing, exploiting the situation. MJ says the people they’re closest to, are the people they pick on. Something they need to flip the script on, and learn to be better. MJ says the person she wants to be isn’t hurtful, and she wishes she’d never hurt anyone or ever gotten hurt. She wishes it was different. Reza says the situation between him and MJ was hard for him. He needed to have conversations, and make apologies and promises. Mike says, it has to stop, for everyone’s piece of mind. He wants to move forward. No more sh*t talking or back stabbing. He needs Paulina to be okay. Reza says they need to act nicely, and let this sh*t stay in Hawaii. Burn the letters. Mike throws them in the fire, and says he doesn’t want to hear one more negative thing.

The next morning, GG asks if Nema has any memories of last night. He was pretty wasted. Nema says she was too, and she says she was beyond wasted. We see her clips of GG dancing around, and saying she’s so drunk. She says, mission aborted, and Nema says, between them. In Nema’s interview, he says, GG made it clear that she was open and willing to have sex. We see GG saying, Nema, now! He says, five minutes, and she says, okey dokey, artichokey. GG says, obviously, he was comfortable enough to have sex, or at least take it where it was. Nema says, there may have been a hot tub moment. They both use paper dolls to illustrate their narrative. They got in the hot tub, and Nema put his back against the jets. GG told Nema that he looked good, and he said she did too. GG was drinking and smoking weed, and pulled Nema closer. Nema says, she bit his lip; it hurt. Her hands were feeling around, wondering, what’s going on down there? GG suddenly tosses the paper dolls in the air. In his interview, Nema says, here’s a beautiful woman, who’s been drinking a lot. He doesn’t know if she’d feel the same way if she was sober. One  time GG told him that she could get any guy she wants. It’s nice to be the one. He smiles, blinding us with his teeth.

Reza and MJ sit outside on the lawn. Reza says, it took coming there to give them perspective in their lives. They have it so good, and have one another’s backs. He puts his head in MJ’s lap. He says he wants to tell her what’s been going on, and how rough sh*t has been. He can’t go through this again. MJ says they’re on the right track, but her worst fear is that he and Tommy aren’t on the right track. They’ve yet to hear what the status is on the restraining order. Reza had said he was lifting it, and not pressing charges. We flash back to MJ and Tommy talking with their lawyer. Reza says, when he gets home, he’s going to have a conversation with his attorney, and let him know that he doesn’t have an interest in pursuing it any more. MJ says when he finally follows through, it will be a big message to Tommy. In MJ’s interview, she says the judge will most likely dismiss the vandalism, and her husband won’t be a felon. Maybe there’s a chance in hell of healing this catastrophe in their relationship. MJ tells Reza, fingers crossed, they’re in the pool in 2020.

In Reza’s interview, he says, clearly, MJ wants him to drop the charges. He’s figuring out if their relationship will get better after he does. It feels like it will, but…

Next time, a Sip and See for Shams, and Mike isn’t going; Reza talks to Adam about Tommy, but Adam wants to stick by the order; and MJ tells Reza if there’s going to be future between them, please don’t do this.

🏥 On General Hospital’s Flashback Friday today – a flashback in a flashback – Sonny remembered his early days, and changed the past in his head – Dante was married to Sam, and working for the Jeromes, along with Jason; and Anna was police commissioner, but had given up on life after Robin died from AIDS. Sonny realized that whatever we choose, there’s a price to pay.

https://www.soapsindepth.com/posts/general-hospital/flashback-friday-maurice-benard-anniversary-episode

🎞 And There’s Also the Moss…

While tedious, they do their job.

https://www.soapsindepth.com/posts/general-hospital/why-showing-flashbacks

🧼 You Know You Love Them…

My husband always gets mad when I say The Sopranos is a soap, but it is. And so is Game of Thrones.

noun: soap opera; plural noun: soap operas

  1. a television or radio drama series dealing typically with daily events in the lives of the same group of characters.

I rest my case. This show, detailing a look into daytime’s history, is very promising. The Story of Soaps airs Tuesday, May 19 at 8:00 p.m. ET on ABC.

https://people.com/tv/story-of-soaps-first-look/

https://www.soapsindepth.com/posts/abc/dont-miss-the-exciting-new-abc-special-the-story-of-soaps

😱 I Can’t Look Away…

Seriously. It’s like a horrible accident.

https://betches.com/brandi-glanville-spills-the-tea-on-denise-richards-rhobh-season-10/

⚰️ And If You Like It Scary…

Some new stuff coming to AMC.

https://www.ihorror.com/amc-announces-changes-for-nos4a2-season-two-and-creepshow/

🎭 A Great Actor Gone…

I had the privilege of seeing Brian Dennehy in Inherit the Wind on Broadway (co-starring Christopher Plummer, no less). He was an amazing actor, who put the same amount of energy playing a neighborhood bully in a TV movie as he did in playing Matthew Harrison Brady.

https://extratv.com/2020/04/16/veteran-actor-brian-dennehy-dead-at-81/?adid=extra_eme_27468_2020-04-17_features1

🍪 In Case You’ve Had Too Many Quarantine Cookies…

Katie shares her secrets, which aren’t really very secret.

https://www.eonline.com/news/1143242/vanderpump-rules-katie-maloney-shares-her-20-pound-weight-loss-secrets

🥁 Quotes of the Week

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none. – William Shakespeare (Who just got a birthday shout out on April 23rd. )

Be the change that you wish to see in the world. – Mahatma Gandhi

It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not. – Andre Gide

Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring. – Marilyn Monroe

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect). – Mark Twain

I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work. – Thomas A. Edison

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it’s in hot water. – Eleanor Roosevelt

We are the forgers, the survivors, and our dance is fierce. – Patti Smith

If my answers frighten you, Vincent, then you should cease asking scary questions. – Jules Winnfield (Samuel L. Jackson), Pulp Fiction

🛫 Even If Just In Your Mind…

Do something different to make the weekend separate from the week. Take in an online Broadway show or concert, tour a museum, a zoo, or Venice. Just think, it’s not often you can just hit pause and go to the bathroom or get a sandwich in the middle of a gondola ride. Do a workout. The online or DVD choices are endless, and you can still go outside. Or read a book. Remember those? Stay safe, stay moving, and stay creative.

Apr24

April 23, 2020 – How Memories Define Us, Leah Tiki Torches Ramona’s Lawn, the Chefs Conduct Flavor Profiles & Up

Posted on by
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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

It’s flashback Thursday in Port Charles.

Sonny says he was thinking about how memories define us. We go down Mike Memory Lane; being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, the Nurses Ball when Sonny helped him sing, Mike’s tantrum on Thanksgiving, and Sonny’s decision to move Mike to Turning Woods.

On the phone, Carly says, the Nurses Ball is coming up. She needs the renovations completed, so the attendees can stay over. She expects to hear from them by 5 pm tonight. Cyrus walks in, and says he hopes he’s not interrupting. She says she already told him, they can’t accommodate him. He says he’s meeting someone there, and she suggests they meet somewhere else. Lulu comes in, and thanks him for meeting her. He says he was just explaining to Carly that she invited him to meet there. Lulu says Cyrus is giving an interview to The Invader, and Carly says, next time Lulu wants to interview a drug trafficker, do it somewhere else. Carly walks off, and Cyrus asks if Lulu would prefer another venue, but she says, no. It’s okay. She already reserved a table.

Mac tells Jordan, the hospital security cameras couldn’t get much on the van that dropped off TJ. Officers are canvasing the area to find out if any witnesses noted the license plate. Chase is also coordinating with the detectives in the field. There’s a knock at the door, and Curtis comes in with coffee. Mac says, the department is doing everything in its power to get justice for TJ. He leaves, and Curtis says she didn’t expect Mac not to investigate, did she? She says she never thought it would be so public. She prays TJ doesn’t remember, especially anything connected to Cyrus.

Sam goes into Charlie’s, where Kristina is working behind the bar. She asks if Sam wants her usual; cream, no sugar. Sam says Kristina knows her well, but she came to see how Kristina is doing, since she’s been preoccupied with Molly. Kristina says, for once, her life is drama free. Julian gave her a raise she didn’t ask for. She doesn’t know what she did to make him feel guilty enough to pay her extra. Sam says it’s nothing Kristina did; it’s what Julian did. He made trouble for their mom.

Alexis meets Neil, who’s now sporting a beard, at the MetroCourt. He says they have a lot to discuss. He didn’t want to do it at the hospital, since it’s so public, and since he can’t practice there, he doesn’t have an office. She says she’s sorry his license was revoked, and he says, never mind him. What about her? She says she hasn’t heard from the Bar. She knows they’ll have an issue with her lying under oath, but it’s not an issue that she slept with him, so there’s that. They can be seen in public like normal people. He says, it’s like a first date.

Sonny is waiting for Carly in her office, and she asks how it went. He says, with Mike? Not good. She asks if he got her text, and he says, sorry. His phone was on silent. He’s been looking at the remodel, and thinks she did a fantastic job. She asks if he really likes it, and he says, it seems unfair. They want to remodel, so they find an architect, approve the designs, and pay for it. Problem solved. With his father, it doesn’t matter how much money he spends, how many doctors he talks to, or what tests they run. He’s losing his father to the disease a little more every day, and there’s nothing he can do about it. She hugs him, and he says, sorry. What was her text about? She says, Cyrus Renault.

Cyrus looks around, and Lulu asks if he’s worried his enemies are lurking and going to take him out during the interview. He says his only enemy there seems to be Carly. Lulu says she can smooth things over there, but Cyrus was allegedly involved in a turf war, so Carly’s husband might be a different matter. He says he reached out to Sonny, one businessman to another, but Sonny wasn’t interested. Sonny might have been misled by his wrongful conviction. She asks him to tell her about it, and he says, corrupt members of law enforcement manufactured evidence that put him in prison. Now he’s free to make a fresh start in Port Charles. She asks what his profession is, and he says he’s an investor. She asks what kinds of things he invests in, and he says, whatever catches his interest and is profitable. It’s all open and above board. She asks how his investments came to the attention of the DEA. We flash back to Jordan visiting Cyrus in prison. He says Jordan had been his right hand, and asks if she remembers those days. Do they haunt her; the things she did? Jordan says he gave the orders, and made things happen, and he asks if she was always a traitor, or did someone turn her? She asks what he thinks, and he says if she came to embarrass him, mission accomplished. To admit one traitor is a mistake, but four? To paraphrase, Oscar Wilde, it sounds like carelessness. He hopes her associates are okay.

Cyrus tells Lulu that he’s a very successful man who’s making a lot of money. People tend to be jealous. When they couldn’t find evidence, they invented it. She asks if he’s holding any grudges, but he says, absolutely not. He lives in the present, not the past. He sees his mission as improving lives and contributing to the betterment of the community. She says, it sounds noble, but the only way he can gain the support of her readers is to give more personal details. Why did he relocate? Does he have family or friends there? There’s nothing about his personal life online. Laura approaches the table, and he says her timing is impeccable. Lulu says, mom? and he says, Laura is her mother? He should have put it together; two attractive, intelligent women being related. Laura says he didn’t do his homework on her? How careless. She did all of her homework on him.

Alexis says if Neil wants to fight the accreditation board – and she thinks he should – count her in. He thinks it’s too soon for his next move, and she says, nothing is stopping them or getting in the way of them seeing each other. Neil says they can finally discover why they can’t resist the urge to be together, no matter what the cost. We flash back to Alexis and Neil meeting at the opera, and Neil coming to her hotel room later. He says that’s why he invited her; to find out what’s next for both of them.

Jason stands on the pier, and we flash back to the early days when he, Sam, and the rest of us were all infants. We see Sam pregnant; the two of them vowing their love forever; dancing at the Chinese restaurant; goofing around, and Jason winning a stuffed toy for Sam at the fair. We move to them being on the run, getting busy, and getting married. We go back to Jason rescuing Sam from the water when he came back after five years, and revealing himself to her at the hospital. We see them watching fireworks on the Haunted Star, escaping the earthquake, and Sam telling Jason she never stopped loving him.

Kristina asks Sam what Julian did to their mom, but Sam thinks Alexis should tell her. She always finds her courage. Kristina says, cryptic, but true. Brando comes in, and asks if his order is ready. Kristina asks his name, and he says, Brando Corbin. Sam says, as in Mike? and he says, Mike is his second cousin. Kristina says, that makes them cousins too, and introduces herself and Sam. She says Sonny is her dad. He’s not Sam’s dad, but she’s a qualifying Corinthos. Brando says Sam is a heroine, but Sam says she wouldn’t take it that far. He says she rescued Dev from Shiloh. It was a messed up situation. He doesn’t get how anyone can fall for that mumbo jumbo cult stuff. We flash back to Kristina telling Jason about Dawn of Day, and that it’s the best thing that ever happened to her. We see Molly telling Kristina, it’s all she talks about. Kristina says, it transformed her life, and Molly says, more like taken over. We move to Jason rescuing Kristina.

Felix sees TJ is back work, on crutches no less. Impressive, and a touch masochistic. TJ says he missed a lot of work. It’s time to get back in the game. Felix asks if he remembers anything, and TJ says he’s trying. Felix says he will. Molly comes by, and hopes TJ is checking his every move with his orthopedist. She doesn’t think making the rounds on crutches is good for his leg. He says she’s already in domestic partner mode, then asks if that sounds clinical. She says they’re the most romantic words she ever heard. She’s just making sure he’s okay. She’s meeting her sisters at Charlie’s. She’s going to let them know that she and TJ are going to be an official couple in the eyes of the law. He says, sorry he can’t drive her. When is her car out of the shop? She says, soon she hopes. He’s glad she wasn’t hurt, and she says, who knew going over a curb could cause so much trouble? He says she knows he’d never leave her. We flash back to Jordan telling Molly to get over TJ. He doesn’t want to see her. Grow up, and accept there are consequences for her actions. She broke TJ’s heart.

Molly tells TJ, she knows now. Even his mom thought he’d ghosted her. She tells him, go save some lives. She’ll see him soon.

Jordan tells Curtis, the department can’t tie TJ’s abduction to Cyrus. Cyrus might hurt TJ even worse. Curtis says, if they don’t, Cyrus is free to set up shop, using her to make it easy. She says she has a pretty good idea of what Cyrus is planning. How does she stop him without risking TJ’s life, or his, or the lives of everyone she loves?

Carly tells Sonny, Lulu asked Cyrus to meet her at the MetroCourt for an interview, so she couldn’t throw him out. Sonny says, Laura must have told Lulu Cyrus was a threat, and Carly says she guesses Lulu picked the MetroCourt because she felt safe. Cyrus is a free man. Sonny says, he had Lulu’s mother shot, but until they can prove it, he’s just another businessman. Jason arrives, and says Cyrus is at the MetroCourt. Carly says she was just telling Sonny, and Sonny asks if Jason had any pushback from canceling the meeting. Jason says, Cyrus wasn’t happy, but Mike is more important. Sonny says he was thinking about it, and Mike started going downhill after the ambush in Brooklyn. We flash back to Mike telling Sonny, he doesn’t want to do this anymore; Mike saying he saying doesn’t know Brando; and telling Sonny that he’s tired. Mike tells Sonny, once they’re back in Bensonhurst, it will be all right.

Carly tells Sonny, Mike was going down before that. That’s why Sonny wanted to get him into the Alzheimer’s trial. Sonny says, afterwards, Mike was so shaken, he couldn’t go back to enroll. A lost opportunity to improve Mike’s brain function. Jason says, maybe, and Sonny says, you never know. Cyrus tried to take him out in front of his father.

Jordan wonders if she should go to the Feds and confess that she’s just as culpable, but Curtis says, no. She’ll go to prison, and Cyrus will remain free. She says she could tell them about TJ being abducted, and Curtis says, based on what? She knows how well Cyrus covers his tracks. Is there any guarantee they’ll find proof? We flash back to Cyrus telling Jordan there’s not much to do in solitary, except be philosophical. Thinking about all the wrongs he has left to right. She asks what he wants; obviously, it’s not to kill her.

Jordan tells Curtis, maybe TJ will remember something incriminating. He says, a moment ago, she was hoping he wouldn’t.

Mac asks TJ if he’s got a minute, and TJ says he was about to take a break. Mac says they’re doing everything to find out who abducted him, and TJ says, Chase took his statement. Mac says he thought he’d follow up and see if TJ remembers anything new. TJ says he’s thought a lot about it, but nothing comes to mind. Mac says, any detail, even if it seems insignificant, will help.

Kristina says she’ll check on Brando’s order, and goes into the kitchen. Brando asks Sam if he said something wrong, and she says, Kristina was part of DoD. She escaped, but it was a long and painful process. It was scary for the family – and Kristina. Next time, Brando might want to keep his opinions to himself. Kristina comes back with his order, and says he paid online, so they’re good. He says, no; they’re not. He wants to apologize. He was out of line. Molly looks through the window, and sees Brando talking with Kristina. We flash back to Molly being at the garage and kissing Brando. We see her finding out TJ was kidnapped, and telling Brando, it was a mistake and never happened.

Neil says, Alexis has to admit, it’s been an insane couple of weeks. She asks what the odds are that they’d be seated next to each other at the opera, and Britt would be in the same hotel. Neil says, and Alexis telling her ex about it. Alexis still can’t believe Julian felt justified to attack Neil like a feral Neanderthal. Then announcing she and Neil slept together. At the hospital. He says maybe if they hadn’t slept together and lied about it, Sam wouldn’t have said what she did. Alexis says Sam’s words weren’t as hurtful as her taking a drink. She asks if he’s angry; he sounds angry. He says that’s because he is, and she asks, at her or himself. He says, both.

Brando tells Kristina, he’s sorry for making a snap judgement. He didn’t know his mouth was big enough for a size 10. She says, you learn something new every day, and he says let him make it up to her. Whenever her car needs something, come to his shop, and he’ll give her a discount. He leaves, and Kristina says, he couldn’t offer it for free? which is exactly what I was thinking. Sam says, he’s just an opinionated jerk. Outside, Molly asks Brando what he’s doing there. He says, picking up food, and she asks why he was talking to her sisters.

Mac tells TJ, start at the beginning. What he remembers before the abduction. TJ says he was upset about something personal, and figured he’s walk it off, and clear his head. Mac asks if he remembers where he was, but TJ isn’t sure. He heard a car behind him, as he was about to reach the corner. Elm and 10th. Mac says, it’s deserted there at night, and TJ says, the next thing he knew, they jumped him. They wrestled him to the sidewalk, and put a sack over his head. Mac asks, how many? and TJ says, two. He tried to fight back, but they tied his hands and beat him up. Mac says, keep going, and TJ says he thinks he blacked out. The next thing he remembers is being in the back of a van; there was a sense of room. The muffler was loud, and woke him up. He thought he might be concussed, so he tried to stay awake. Mac asks if he remembers which way they were headed, and TJ says, after a few left turns, they stopped. He heard a train horn. Mac says, the nearest crossing by Elm and 10th is Dockery. How long was the ride? TJ thinks ten or fifteen minutes. They chloroformed him before he could identify anyone. He came to in a basement. Mac asks if he remembers any sounds or smells, and TJ says he remembers both.

Curtis tells Jordan, going to the Feds isn’t an option. If they haul Cyrus in based on her word, and can’t find a shred of evidence, they’ll be forced to let him go. Cyrus will be out in Port Charles, thinking of a way to get even. Jordan says, unless she tells them about Harmony. Harmony can cut a deal, and  they can put her in the witness protection program. Curtis loves her crystal ball, but as soon as Cyrus finds out Harmony is talking, she’s a dead woman, along with anyone willing to turn state’s evidence. We flash back to Cyrus saying, no locked, windowless room, no mayor, no Commissioner, nothing can keep a determined man from getting what he wants.

Jordan tells Curtis, she’s boxed in, with nothing to do but cooperate.

Cyrus tells Lulu, her mother is concerned for his safety. She insisted he return to Seattle, but when he said he wanted to make his home there, she told him that if he was killed, she’d bring his perpetrators to justice. Lulu says her mother cares about all of her constituents, no matter who they are. He says he’s proud to call himself one of Port Charles’s citizens, and he’s going to work hard be an asset. He’s going to start by contributing to Laura’s campaign.

Sonny tells Carly and Jason, Elizabeth thinks his father should have a DNR. Carly asks what Sonny thinks, and he says, he thinks it’s too soon. Jason says Elizabeth is the best nurse there, and Sonny says, she also suggested palliative care. If something happens, they’ll make sure Mike is in no pain, but they can’t give him treatment. Carly asks what Mike thinks, and Sonny says, Mike didn’t say a lot. He was unfocused. They did have a great moment when he was feeding Mike. Mike liked it, and he could see his dad was still in there. Sonny smiles.

On Monday, Laura looks forward to hearing Cyrus’s decision, Alexis gets an email from the NY Bar Association, and Sonny wants to get it over with.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Ramona apologizes not giving Lu Ann her room. LuAnn says, it’s not about that. It’s that she wasn’t considered, and she was hurt. The spiders and the smell were the worst. She says Ramona knows she’s not a spoiled brat. Ramona says she was wrong, and please come back. LuAnn says she’s going to kick Ramona’s ass at tennis, and she’s sleeping at her own house. Leah says, only in the Hamptons is it like, bitch, I’ll see you on the tennis court. Dorinda doesn’t want to go to the party tonight, and wants to stay home. In Ramona’s interview, she says, it’s her friend’s birthday party in Sag Harbor. She loves the women, but not that much. She wants to get some action; food, wine, dancing, and men. She reminds Sonja about how Elyse called her a trophy wife, and she kept telling Elyse to take it back. Tinsley says, then Sonja threw it on her. Sonja says she was a hard-working wife, and Tinsley says she was too. Sonja asks where the shoe repair place was in her neighborhood, and Tinsley says she’s not getting on this loop. In Leah’s interview, she says, the first rule of a trophy wife is, if you have to explain why you weren’t a trophy wife, you probably were a trophy wife. Leah says Sonja said the same thing to Tinsley that she found offensive.

Tennis coach Adriano comes to Ramona’s. In her interview, she says he’s the hottest tennis pro in Hamptons. LuAnn arrives, and in her interview, says she doesn’t think Ramona stuck her in the basement on purpose; Ramona just doesn’t think. LuAnn isn’t letting it ruin her weekend. She tells Ramona, don’t try to be nice; it’s not her M.O. Ramona says even though there’s a party tonight, she’s going to hang out with her friends, since they’re more important. Dorinda comes out, and asks if their midnight rider is back. In Dorinda’s interview, Ramona uses the 80s method of hiring people. They have to be good-looking, fit, and somewhat datable. This has nothing to do with tennis. LuAnn is competitive, and wants to beat Ramona, and Ramona will just pretend to play while her boobs are hanging out. LuAnn wins the match. Dorinda says she’s never played, and plays better than Ramona.

Leah tells Tinsley, she loves Sonja, but Sonja needs to stop saying she married the bank. We see a clip of drunk Sonja yapping about her private island and yacht. She says, it’s sad that Sonja won’t move on. In Leah’s interview, she says it’s strange how she knows so much about the life Sonja used to live, but nothing about the life she’s living now. The yacht has sailed, and she needs to get over it. LuAnn grills Adriano on his personal life, and he says it’s hard to meet someone in Manhattan. LuAnn says it could happen when he least expects it. It could happen today. He’s like, maybe not.

Ramona has problems with the grill, while Dorinda makes frozé. In her interview, Dorinda thinks what LuAnn went through was intense and difficult, but she’s getting past it. Ramona bitches about no one helping, and whines that there’s no silverware out. Leah explains the silverware is in the napkins. Dorinda and LuAnn get pissed about how Ramona is talking to Leah. In Dorinda’s interview, she wonders if they’re staying there, or working for Ramona. What’s the hourly wage? Leah says that’s how her family talks to each other, and in her interview, says she was raised to respect her elders, so she lets Ramona get away with it – for now. Ramona screeches for help with the grill. In her interview, she says Mario was always in charge of grilling.

They sit down to eat, and Ramona says she was telling LuAnn about their conversation on vulnerability. She asks if LuAnn would like to add something. LuAnn says it’s hard for her not to drink. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, the hard part is knowing she can drink if she wants, but is choosing not to. Right now, she wishes she was back in the game with the girls. She tells them, it’s a challenge for her, and the first time she’s felt that way in a while. In Sonja’s interview, she says she’s proud of where LuAnn is; that she can be open and honest. LuAnn says it would be fine if she drank, but she’d be upset with herself. In her interview, she says she made a resolve not to drink. In Leah’s interview, she says there’s probably so much going through LeeAnn’s mind. The same stuff was going through hers when she decided to start drinking, but LuAnn has to make that decision for herself. Ramona says she’s proud of LuAnn.

Dog groomers Ed and Michael arrive to groom Sonja’s Marley. In LuAnn’s interview, she says Michael is a hot guy. She’d like to be groomed. Sonja says, it’s a full-service house, with tennis and dog grooming, and delivers Marley to them. Michael bathes Marley in the sink, and LuAnn asks if he needs help. She tells him that she has a Westie. Ramona comes in, and in her interview, she says, if there’s a man in the house, LuAnn is on it. People think she’s the biggest flirt, but LuAnn is. Marley also gets a massage, and Michael massages LuAnn’s neck. She says he has great hands, and asks if he makes house calls. Sonja dances in front of the dog hair dryer.

They get ready for dinner, having decided to stay in. Dorinda says she doesn’t do well at big parties, and she’s bored with herself. Tinsley says she’s a stage mom with her dogs. Leah asks if Ramona needs help, but Ramona says, no, and Dorinda says Ramona would just yell at her anyway. Leah says she’s glad they’re staying in. She doesn’t have to worry about any weird white guys showing up. Weird white guy Jeff arrives. Ramona says he’s a friend, makes great lasagna, and is a great pianist. Leah says, it’s a p*ssy party, and wonders why there’s one penis in the room. In Ramona’s interview, she says everyone is going to her friend’s party, but the girls didn’t want to go. She tells Sonja that she called different guys, and he’s the only one who showed up. Leah drinks out of a glass that she thought was cranberry juice, and Tinsley tells her there’s vodka in there. In Tinsley’s interview, she thinks as long as she’s around, Leah won’t go off the deep end… hopefully… maybe… They play beer pong with plastic champagne glasses. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, they’re more like frat guys getting wasted. There are times she misses drinking, but tonight isn’t one of them. She can’t help but watch, and think, is this how she was when she was drunk? Elyse joins them, and Sonja attacks Tinsley with a vibrator. Jeff wisely decides to make an exit. Sonja says, this is the best party ever.

Dorinda says Ramona hurt her feelings, saying she’d be done with John in two years. We see a clip of Ramona saying just that to a guy at the party the night before. LuAnn says, Ramona is so insensitive. Outside, Tinsley says she’s getting naked, and Leah says she’s going stir crazy. There’s only so much talk about yachts and declassé she can take. Leah and Tinsley get in the pool, Tinsley in her underwear, and Leah without anything. Leah tries to put out a torch by flinging Dom Perignon at it. Inside, Dorinda says, it’s not always great with John, but he’s different choice for her. She accepted John into her life as a friend, and he’s family to her now. She’s about the foundation of the house. Ramona says, what if John is getting girl’s phone numbers? Would Dorinda be upset?  Dorinda asks why she’s saying that. It’s an a-hole thing to say. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, one thing she knows for sure, John never flirted with Ramona. LuAnn asks why Ramona is rolling her eyes, and Ramona says one of the girls told her John was getting numbers. In Ramona’s interview, she says Dorinda became a different person after John, and she’s not totally happy. Ramona thinks Dorinda realizes it down deep. Elyse says Ramona is mean, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says, Ramona has no bedside manner. She’s the Dr. Kevorkian of delivering messages. Sonja goes outside, and Leah says, take it off – now. Leah flings a torch across the lawn, and Sonja flings another one. Leah chases her around the pool, and says she hates the torches. Sonja gets nakey, and gets in the pool with a bottle of champagne. She says she feels young and fun. Leah says Dorinda is judging them, but Sonja says, Dorinda’s not judgy.

Dorinda tells Ramona, don’t say anything mean again. In Ramona’s interview, she says, no one could get that John wasn’t like Richard. He’s not as well-spoken, intelligent, or dignified. We flash back to John asking Ramona to leave one of Dorinda’s parties, with Ramona looking pretty undignified herself. Ramona says, people wonder what Dorinda is doing with him. Tinsley takes her top off, and Leah tells LuAnn to get in the pool. LuAnn says, let her think about it, and goes back inside. Which means she didn’t even have to think about it. It’s just no.

LuAnn tells the others, the girls are in the pool naked. Leah, Tinsley, and Sonja come back inside. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she can’t believe Tinsley. She won’t even wear a bathing suit without a wrap. What would Dale think? Leah comes in wearing a sheer top with no bra, and Dorinda tells her to cover up. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s too much. For the first time in a long time, she’s speechless. She steers Leah into one of the bedrooms. We hear her comment that Leah’s lady parts have wings, and Leah comes back out, wearing a leopard bustier under her blouse. Tinsley slurps spaghetti. Ramona says she’s leaving for the party, and LuAnn can’t believe it. In Ramona’s interview, she says all of them were invited. They’re going to drink themselves to sleep, and she’s not staying home. She tells Sonja that she’s seeing her superficial friends. In Sonja’s interview, she says, this is a new low. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, you shouldn’t leave your guests. Ramona gets the worst hostess award. Elyse says, Ramona has to go. The cost might be that she doesn’t meet a man. Sonja gets loud and animated, bringing up Elyse saying she was just an accessory when she was married. Leah says, that ship sailed, but Sonja says she wants to talk about what Elyse said. Leah yells, 1985 is over! In her interview, Sonja wonders when the party became occupy the Hamptons, She says Leah has a chip on her shoulder, and Sonja says Dorinda didn’t want her to put the family logo on her shoes. We flash back to Dorinda saying she thought it was mortifying. Sonja says she’s in the Blue Book. I fail to see how this is some kind of great achievement, but then again, I’m not in the Blue Book. Sonja and Leah scream at each other for a minute. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, maybe this is why Leah stopped drinking. Leah tells Tinsley not to get socialite on her, and Sonja calls Leah a hater. Leah says she’s not. She just wants Sonja to let it go. Sonja goes in the bathroom, saying, Leah never lived it. Leah follows her, and Sonja gets in Leah’s face, saying, Tinsley built a brand based on marrying a Mortimer. They end up hugging it out, although I’ll be damned if I know how they got there. Elyse says, if they all went into group therapy, the therapist would end up in an asylum.   

The next morning, it’s a mess outside – tikis everywhere, broken glass, a champagne bottle floating in the pool. Dorinda demands that Sonja do some facial masks with her. In Sonja’s interview, she says she feels hurt about Leah’s assumptions. She tells Dorinda, Ramona is going to go apesh*t. Leah is downstairs when Ramona sees the mess. The kitchen is also a nightmare, food everywhere, a pair of glasses in a wineglass, and a vibrator in a plate of chicken. I don’t even want to think about it. I also have to say it. I have gotten my drink on in my day, but I have never trashed a place. Not once. And I’ve been to some wild parties and seedy bars. Ramona says she has to laugh or she’ll cry. She’s actually taking it better than I would. Leah says she doesn’t want to look outside, so Ramona goes outside. She says, not cool. In her interview, she says, talk about no respect. She yells for Dorinda and Sonja to get their asses down there. In her interview, Leah says, her memory is a little cloudy… Oh yeah, the tiki torches. She remembers getting mad at them.

Sonja brushes Marley’s hair, and Dorinda says, that’s her brush. Sonja says, sorry; she’s used to doing that. Ramona stomps upstairs, and they hide under the blanket. Ramona says she feels like getting the strap out like her father did. She asks what went on outside? and Dorinda says Ramona left her own party. Ramona says she’s on a mission to find a partner, and she got a date. Sonja says, there’s something new, and outs Leah for throwing a tiki torch, but admits she threw one too. Dorinda says she wasn’t a part of it. Ramona goes back down to the kitchen, which Leah has somehow miraculously cleaned up in a New York minute. Ramona says she was informed that Leah started the tiki fight. In Leah’s interview, she says sometimes she’s extra, and sometimes she drinks extra. She didn’t hurt anyone. Ramona asks her to at least pick up the torches. In her interview, Ramona says, Leah is no dumb cookie. She’d said she hadn’t done it, but cleaned up the kitchen so fast, Ramona can hardly be angry at her.

Ramona tells Dorinda, she’s never woken up to a kitchen looking like that, but Dorinda says she can’t expect her guests to clean at night. She hires help when she has guests, and Ramona should have stayed there. She could have initiated them all cleaning up together. Leah is surprised that Ramona left, having not noticed the night before. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she knows what it’s like. Ramona has cajones. She tells Ramona, karma’s a bitch, and tells Leah about Ramona ripping the lights off the bedroom walls in Dorinda’s house in the Berkshires. We flash back to that, and Dorinda saying she was horrified. Ramona says she was fine until she went outside. Leah says, it’s not that bad; she thinks the kitchen was worse.

Ramona and Dorinda go outside, and Dorinda agrees, saying, it’s ridiculous. It’s like a frat house. Leah says she takes responsibility for the torches. She felt like she was in Game of Thrones. Dorinda says she thought she was at the Playboy mansion. Dorinda wonders where Tinsley is, and we see her tucked into bed, the plate of leftover spaghetti next to her.

Next time, Sonja has a show at New York Fashion Week, Tinsley talks about her mother, and Leah thinks Sonja is full of sh*t and passive/aggressive.

👩🏼‍🍳 On Top Chef, in the Quickfire challenge, the chefs had to make a dish using flour, but not all purpose flour. This time, there would be no immunity, but to soften the blow, the winner would receive $5000. The guest judge was award winning chef and restaurateur Chris Bianco. I was shocked at flours I’d never heard of. Tapioca flour? Garbanzo bean flour? What? Bryan full of Malarkey went for a second try with ice cream, even though his first one was a disaster. The ice cream came out fine, but the donut that was supposed to go with it, never made it to the plate at all. Gregory was the winner, with some tapioca flour pancakes topped with maple syrup, although whatever he called them sounded fancier than that.

For the elimination challenge, in celebration of the 100th season of the L.A. Philharmonic, the chefs would be feeding Gustavo Dudamel, the L.A. Philharmonic’s conductor, and 60 members of his orchestra at Otium restaurant. The guest judge would be Timothy Collingwood, owner of Otium. The chefs chose knives from the five flavor profiles – salty, sweet, sour, bitter, and umami (savory). The chefs paired up, and their two flavor profiles had to make a cohesive dish together. It was going to be a double-elimination. For inspiration, the chefs went to the Walt Disney Concert Hall, where conductor Gustavo, who started his career when he was eleven (!), talked to them about how food was like art, and he liked the similarities between food and music.

It was back to work, and Lee Anne, who had the misfortune of being paired with full of Malarkey, said shopping with him was like shopping with monkeys on crack.

The judges were looking for the team who was true to the challenge, the flavor profile, and themselves. Melissa and Kevin were the winners with a salty and sweet cabbage thing. When it was time to decide who was going, and the judges talked among themselves, Padma looked as stern as I’ve ever seen her. Gail said two chefs would be going home for fantastic food, and it felt wrong. They’re now at that point, as happens in every competition, where everyone is good, and they have to get picky. Nini and Karen had to pack their knives and go for their umami and sour fish offering. In her interview, Karen said there wasn’t just a personal sadness, but a double layer of guilt. Nini said her curse was to be in a double elimination. Tom told them not to go just yet, as they were going right into Last Chance Kitchen. Thanks for the warning.

Next time, not only will the chefs be using a machete, Machete will be there when Danny Trejo (one of my favorites) is a guest.

🥜 Sometimes You Feel Like a Weekend…

We’ve gotten to that time in the week that feels weird for some of you right now. Tomorrow’s Friday, but it doesn’t have that buoyant feel it did not that long ago. That’s right, it wasn’t that long ago, it won’t be long now, and you’re still here. Relax. Stay safe, stay watching TV that’s not all news, and stay in your lane. Or not.

Apr23

April 22, 2020 – Willow Tells Michael What She Saw, Summer Duds, Erika Lands Chicago & Not That Long

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Elizabeth comes by Mike’s room at Turning Woods, and says she misses Mike’s smile. She tells Sonny, she knows some days are better than others, and today was rough. She’s hoping the family and his surroundings will be a comfort. Sonny tells Mike to get some rest. When Mike is ready to talk, he’ll be there.

Willow goes to Charlie’s. She flashes back to finding Sasha and Chase together. She remembers telling Chase, when they thought she was pregnant, he said it would be a dream come true. He says, eventually, when they decide together. She says she thought they were on the same page, and he says, every waking moment, she’s consumed, and can’t let go. It’s like she got on the train, it left the station, and she never realized he got left behind. She goes into Charlies, and sees Michael there. He says he wanted it to be just the two of them without Diane. He loves Diane, but she’s a lawyer, and the last thing he wants is for Willow to feel uncomfortable. Willow remembers seeing Chase and Sasha kissing on the couch, and Sasha saying Willow wasn’t supposed to come home.

Chase and Sasha look at their wine glasses. She says, it’s not too late to go after Willow, and tell her the truth; they faked all this. They shoved it together, and it was stupid and crazy. Michael and Willow are the best things that have ever happened to them, and she’s so sorry. It might be awkward for a while, and maybe they can’t hang out together anymore, but they’ll have the people they love back. Chase says, it sounds amazing and awesome for them, but what about Michael and Willow? Does she think they’ll be happier with them, or together with Wiley?

Nina says Nelle is at work late, and Nelle says she wants to get it in while she can. She won’t be able to work nights when Wiley is living with her. Nina asks if Nelle isn’t getting ahead of herself, but Nelle says, it’s going to happen. As soon as she’s able, she wants to get a house. Something small, but sweet, with a picket fence, and a swing in the front yard. She always wanted that. Nina says, so did she.

Alexis meets Diane at the MetroCourt. She says she’s been looking forward to this all day,  and asks where Max is. Diane says he’s not joining them, and Alexis suggests they get a smaller table, but Diane says they still need a bigger one. Sam approaches the table, and Alexis says Diane set her up. Diane says, damn right she did, and Sam sits down.

Sonny tells Elizabeth that Mike took a fall today. The doctor said it was to be expected. Elizabeth says, that’s true with neurological disorders. Elizabeth asks if Mike is thirsty, and Sonny says he tried giving Mike some water, but he spit it out. Elizabeth asks if she can try. She puts a straw to Mike’s mouth, and asks him to take a sip. He doesn’t, and she says they’ll try again in a little bit. She has an idea, and puts some water on a washcloth. She dabs Mike’s lips with it, and then he sucks on it. She says, nice, right? She asks if he minds if she steals Sonny for a minute, and Sonny says he’ll be right back. They go into the hallway, and she asks when Mike started having a problem with drinking. Sonny says, it’s the first he’s seen Mike do that, but the staff said they were having problems getting him to eat yesterday. He assumed it was all the moving around. She says, people at this stage do better with a routine that’s not disruptive, but it seems to be more than that.

Sam tells Alexis, before she lays into Diane, this was her idea. She asked Diane to be here. Diane asks what Alexis thinks she’s doing, hiding from her daughter? Alexis says she’s not hiding, and that’s an aggressive word. Diane says she’s been with Alexis twice when she let calls from Sam go to voicemail. Alexis says she didn’t think it would be polite to answer, and Diane laughs. She says, complete avoidance. She can’t force Alexis to tell Sam what’s going on, but as Alexis’s bestie, she’s telling her that shutting her daughter out is hurting her, and she’s denying herself the support she desperately needs.

Chase tells Sasha, he can only speak his side; the Willow side. He fell in love with her the minute after he saw her, sitting in her car in the parking garage, in full-on tears. He couldn’t stop staring at her. We flash back to her wildly beeping the horn, and yelling that she’s being robbed, while he tries to tell her that he’s a cop; a detective. She tells him, listen, Sherlock, and threatens to run over him. He says, here’s his shield, showing her, and she asks if he thinks he’s Captain America. Chase tells Sasha, in all the time they’ve spent together, not once did Willow walk into a room and not take his breath away. Sasha asks why Willow was in tears when they met, and he says, she was crying over the baby she’d given up. He didn’t know at the time how fitting it was how they met. As deeply as he’s loved her this entire time, he knew her heart was with that child.

Michael tells Willow, whatever it is, they’ll fix it, but she says she has to tell him what’s going on. She doesn’t want to hurt him, but doesn’t want to lie to him either. He says he’s a big boy, and can handle whatever it is. She says, Chase and Sasha are having an affair. He says, what? He knows they’ve been spending a lot of time together lately, but did she just get that impression, or was there more to it? She says she got that impression when she came home and found them in each other’s arms. Michael wants to be clear, and says, she saw Sasha and Chase together? She says, on the couch, with his shirt off and hers unbuttoned. They weren’t having sex, but they were on their way. She’s sorry. He doesn’t understand. How and when? She says she asked the same thing. He says, and…? she says he’s not going to like the answer.

Diane asks if they’re just going to sit and look at each other. Alexis says, if it’s so important, you tell her. Diane says she’s not telling Sam. That doesn’t fix anything; only confronting it does. Diane starts to get up, but Alexis tells her to sit back down. She set up this half-assed intervention; she’s going to stay for the fallout. Sam asks, what’s going on? and Alexis says she had a drink.

Nina tells Nelle, she wanted a swing when she was little. Nelle says Nina lived in Manhattan, and Nina says that’s why she didn’t get one. Her parents set up an elaborate swing set in the Hamptons. Nelle says, that sounds nice, but Nina says, it’s not what she wanted. What she desired was a simple wood swing hanging from a tree. It’s not about the swing, but what it represents; a family, cozy and happy and loving. It was a fantasy she dreamed up for herself. Nelle says she had the same dream from the other side. They moved a lot to crap rentals, mostly condos. They all have a play area; sunbaked, cracked, and broken, not like what she’d dreamed. She never got her fairytale, so she’s going to make damn sure her son gets his.

Willow says she thinks it’s a combination of things. She’ll start at the beginning, or where she thinks is the beginning. Around Thanksgiving, she thought she was pregnant. It was only for a couple of days, but looking back, Chase had a different reaction than she did. He was wonderful and supportive, talking about someday kids. Michael says, but not today, and Willow says, when they thought it might be a reality, she could tell Chase was freaked out. In a sweet, loving way, but she understands. They hadn’t talked about kids, or even marriage. She thinks Chase was unsettled by it, and didn’t tell her because of the Wiley situation. Now, looking back, she guesses she didn’t notice where he was in life – or wasn’t. He wanted something less complicated, less lifetime commitment. He just wasn’t there. Michael flashes back to telling Sasha that he doesn’t expect her to be instamom, and her saying, obviously Wiley comes first. As for them, they’re good, and they’ll take it as it comes. They’ll figure out the Wiley part later. He tells Willow, Sasha wasn’t there either.  

Chase tells Sasha, by the time Willow realized her baby died, it didn’t matter. Not that it didn’t matter, but… Sasha knows what he means. Willow already loved Wiley, and thought of him as her own. Chase says he thinks Willow could be happy without Wiley, but if Wiley was ever hurting or suffering, and it was within Willow’s power to stop it, he doesn’t think she could live with that. For him, the best way to love her – and he does – is to tell this lie and let her go. Sasha says, what if he’s wrong?

Elizabeth tells Sonny, in cases like Mike’s, his literally memory is fading, but his body is struggling to remember how to work. Has he discussed palliative care with the doctors? Sonny says Mike isn’t ready for end of life care, but she says, it’s more like an extra layer of support. It can easily be done there; Mike doesn’t have to move. They’ll have a team of people, experienced in Mike’s condition. She thinks it would be helpful for all of them. He says, just when you think you’ve got a handle on the disease, it gets worse. She says that’s why she thinks it’s important that both he and Mike have support. They can answer any questions, and talk through the options. He gets the feeling Elizabeth has something specific in mind, and she says she couldn’t help but notice Mike has no DNR in place. At this point, she thinks he needs one.

Sam asks Alexis when this happened, and Alexis says when Sam left the bar, but… Sam says she’s so sorry. She should never have unloaded like that; it’s her fault. Alexis says that’s not the reason she had a drink. There were a lot of things weighing on her mind. It had nothing to do with Sam. Sam asks, what kind of things? and Alexis says, when she was in New York to testify at Neil’s hearing, they slept together. Diane says, what now? and Alexis says, she had sex with Neil. Diane says, she had sex with Neil? and Sam repeats, she had sex with Neil? Sam says, Alexis told her that they had no personal relationship, and Alexis says, when she agreed to testify, they didn’t. Diane says, hypothetically, sneaking around after what was certainly an amazing night with Neil, Alexis was far too wise to go down to the review board. Alexis says that’s exactly what she did; she lied. Sam says, under oath? and Alexis says, yep.

Nina tells Nelle, by no means does she have to stay, but if the copy she’s looking for comes, can Nelle run it to her? She’s meeting Jax at the MetroCourt bar. Nelle says, no problem, and Nina says she was thinking about what Nelle said. She’s sure Nelle and Michael want the same thing. Doesn’t Nelle think there’s some way to have a meeting of the minds? Watching Lulu and Valentin go at it, she can see they’ve lost sight of what’s best for their daughter. Nelle tells her, explain that to Michael. She tried. She’d love nothing more than to co-parent, but when she’s brought it up, she gets a lecture on how evil and toxic she is. He doesn’t see her love for Wiley. All he sees is an endless list of her perceived wrongs. Nina asks if it’s unjustified, and Nelle says she knows she’s made mistakes, but she wants to do and be better for Wiley. Nina is lucky that she can leave the past in the past. Nina says she’s very fortunate. If she can offer one piece of advice… if the opportunity for compromise presents itself, take it. She tells Nelle, don’t work too late, and leaves.

Sasha asks if she and Chase aren’t basically playing God, getting together to steer Willow and Michael, as if they can’t figure it out for themselves and decide what they should do. Chase says he thought they talked about it, and she says she was a 100% willing participant, but now that they’ve actually done it… He says he knows, and Sasha says, what if Michael and Willow blame each other, or end up hating each other, or some other terrible thing happens to make it not work out? Chase asks if she really thinks that’s a possibility, and she says what she thinks is that Michael and Willow are going to get married, because that’s what Wiley needs. She thinks they’ll do their best to be kind and supportive for the sake of the child. And she thinks before Wiley’s third birthday, or maybe sooner, Willow will be madly in love with Michael, and be the happiest woman on the face of the earth. She cries.

Michael tells Willow, everything changed when he found out Wiley was his son. She says, of course (🍷) it did. He says, Wiley came first, and Sasha was incredible about it; caring and supportive. Willow says, but… and he says, she made it clear that she was in no place to be a mom. Willow says, which, like Chase, is understandable. Michael says, she’d put the drama behind her and was on the brink of a new career she was excited about. She didn’t want an instant family, but made it clear nothing had to change. They defined the rules. She was fine with it in theory, but then Nelle showed up. Sasha stepped up, but like Chase, she was telling him what he needed to hear. Playing a part. Not that he was paying attention to what she would have told him, but she could tell Chase.

Elizabeth tells Mike, she’ll visit soon, and hopes today gets better. Mike says, he’s so tired, and she says she’s sure. It’s okay. Close his eyes, and rest. Sonny thanks her for visiting, and she says, of course (🍷). She tells him, think about what she said, and he says he will. They hug, and she leaves. Mike sleeps.

Diane says, all is not lost, and Sam says, it’s not? Diane says, not that she’s ever a fan of perjury, but as long as no one knows, and they were discreet… Alexis says, Britt knows. She saw them at the hotel; she was there the same night. Diane asks how it came up, and Alexis says the night she had the drink, she was trying to reach someone for a ride, and called Julian. He thought she drank because of Neil, and his snitch of a girlfriend told him that she and Neil slept together. Then Julian took it upon himself to attack Neil at the hospital, screaming at the top of his lungs that they’d slept together. Diane says, it gets better, and Alexis says, it’s out. Diane asks if Neil has heard from the medical review board, but Alexis says, not that she knows of. Diane says, hopefully, it will just go away, but she’s asking Alexis, please, go to a meeting and work on her sobriety. She thinks it’s going to be a bumpy night ahead. Alexis says, good idea, and Sam says she’ll drive. Alexis thanks Diane for being her good friend. Diane says, her pleasure, but let’s not ever do this again.

Michael says, he was so fixated on Wiley’s medical crisis. Willow says he doesn’t know the half of it. She didn’t tell him, she was so crazed went charging to Nina’s office, asking her to run an article in Crimson about how toxic Nelle is. She thinks Chase and Sasha are genuinely trying to be supportive, but Michael says, that’s got nothing to do with where Sasha and Chase were. Willow says, Chase isn’t grieving a child, like she is, and Sasha isn’t an overnight parent, like Michael. They’re onlookers, and the only people they could turn to were each other. Michael says, he can see it. They felt hurt, mad, frustrated, and one or both of them had too many drinks. Willow is sure once it started, it was something between them that they shared, that she and Michael couldn’t understand. He says, there are a million better ways to handle it than they did. He tells Willow, come on, and she asks where they’re going. He says she can’t go back to Chase. He’ll arrange a room at the MetroCourt. She says she should say no, and Michael says, they can’t be the friends who say what the other should hear. They’re not like Chase and Sasha. They say what they mean. She thanks him, and they leave.

Sasha tells Chase, she doesn’t think she realized how much she loved Michael until now. She was happy and things were great, but now that it’s over, he means more to her than she realized. Chase asks if she regrets it, but she says, no. She’s going to miss him though. Chase says she didn’t understand how much she loved Michael until now, but he knew how much he loved Willow all along. Sasha asks, which is worse? and he says he honestly doesn’t know.

Nina waits at the MetroCourt, and Willow approaches. She asks if Willow is okay, and Willow says she is, but Nina asks if she’s sure. Willow says she doesn’t know if Nina remembers, but when Willow asked about publishing an article about Nelle, Nina pointed out something. That it wasn’t her place to arrange Michael’s defense; she’s too close. The custody fight isn’t hers. Nina was right. Just not in the way she thought.

The doorknob on Chase’s apartment jiggles, and Michael tells Chase, open the door. Chase asks if Sasha is ready for this, and she says, no. He lets Michael in, and Michael sees Sasha. He says, wow. He didn’t think she’d still be there. He thought he’d talk to Chase, but now he can kill two birds with one stone. Just one question. Chase says, just one? and Michael says he’ll start with this one. How long this been going on?

Nelle looks through the files on Nelle’s desk, and moves the necklace out of the way. She finds the papers she wants, and leaves with it, not noticing what’s in the jewelry box.

Mike looks at Sonny, and Sonny asks how he’s feeling. He didn’t eat yesterday, so Sonny had something sent over, a surprise. Olivia’s manicotti. He tells Mike to smell it, and Mike closes his eyes, and sniffs. Sonny says, smells amazing, right? Don’t tell Olivia, but he thinks it’s almost as good as his. Mike says, almost. Sonny asks if he’ll have a bite to eat. Just one bite; nothing crazy.

Sonny opens the manicotti, and says it reminds him of the old neighborhood. Mike will love it. He holds out a spoonful, but Mike doesn’t respond. Sonny says, he’s got to eat. Please. Mike looks at him, and sniffs it. He says, smells like home, and Sonny says, it does smell like home. Here you go. He puts the spoon in Mike’s mouth.

Nina asks Willow how she’s right, and Willow says, never mind. She shouldn’t be talking about this. She’s so all over the place. Nina says her track record with Willow isn’t great, and she’s not trying to pry, but clearly something is bothering her. So if there’s anything Nina can do, even just listen. Does Willow want her to call Chase? Willow says, Chase is the last person she should call. Nina asks, why? and Willow says, because she just found out Chase and Sasha are having an affair. Nelle overhears.

Sasha tells Michael, she and Chase ran into each other at The Floating Rib when Michael was meeting Diane, and decided to grab a drink. Michael says he has a feeling they grabbed more than that, and she says they were feeling shut out and commiserating. They didn’t want to hurt Michael or Willow, but didn’t know how to tell them. Michael says he’s sorry he didn’t pick up on the cues. Sasha says it was wrong, but she can’t stand watching him hate her. She leaves, and Chase says, however bad they screwed up, it’s not that they didn’t care. Michael says, that’s for them to deal with, but how the hell could he do that to Willow? He’s heartbroken, and it kills him that Sasha would do that to him; that Chase would do that. But he’ll survive. He’s been through worse, but Willow is different. She believed in Chase as much as anyone could believe in someone. She trusted him with her heart, and deserves better. He destroyed something precious. He says he knows he contributed too. He leaned too hard and too often on Willow, but he’d never treat her the way Chase did, and he’s going to make damn sure it never happens again. He pushes Chase, and walks out. When he’s gone, Chase cries.

Tomorrow, Alexis asks Neil what’s next for them, Jordan has a good idea what Cyrus is planning, Laura tells Cyrus that she’s done all her homework on him, and Sonny asks Carly if she wants him to just let his father die.

🤽🏼‍♂️ About Summer House – I know, I know. I always only give one comment about this show, that the people are still awful. BTW, they still are. The guys are sleazeballs, and the girls are idiots. It’s not that I forget how awful they are, and watch it again, as I’ve done with other shows, like any incarnation of Jersey Shore, or Real World in its later years. A span of time would go by, and I’d forget why I stopped watching. Then I’d watch again, remember why I stopped watching, and stop watching again. This is different though. I guess I have some kind of horrible fascination with this show. Or maybe I want to be sure if I ever need an investment banker, or whatever it is they do, it isn’t one of them. Although they seem interchangeable. There’s a Kyle and Carl, which doesn’t help, and Kyle – at least I think it’s Kyle – has a doppelganger this season. Are they brothers? I don’t pay enough attention to know. I also constantly wonder, how is it at their age (mostly mid-30s), they’re still summering together in the Hamptons, and acting like it’s Delta house? Is this some weird latent extension of college life? What is this?

https://www.distractify.com/p/how-old-is-cast-of-summer-house

💎 Still on the fence about giving The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills my full attention. I’ll never forgive them for driving LVP away, but I can’t wait for Brandi to screw her friend (literally and figuratively) over. Sadly, it has to be Denise, who I’ve loved since It’s Complicated. I wasn’t pleased with her minor involvement with taking LVP down, last season, but she seems like a decent person. I was also disappointed that she had a friendship with Brandi, but there you go. That went well. I wouldn’t trust that one as far as I could throw the amount of fillers pumped into her face.

Dorit has a new house; 9,000 square feet. We found out it was only in her name, which she seemed to think was common. I assume they’re talking about the mortgage, not the deed, which probably means they used only her credit score, alluding to PK’s bankruptcy. There was a lot of blah-blah-blah lawsuit, and an interviewer trying to ask her questions about it at an event. In an odd change of format, during interviews, we heard the producers asking the questions. While they do that once in a while, we don’t normally hear that side of the script. Maybe they’re trying to put a new spin on it? Garcelle also got a new house, a measly 3200 square feet. We got a little background on Garcelle, who’d thought ex-husband Mike was her last stop. Instead, she found out he’d been having an affair for the past five years.

LisaR’s Amelia was in NYC going to the New School, but having panic attacks and anxiety. She’d posted on Instagram about having a fear of growing up. Teddi said she’d reached out to Amelia, but maybe LisaR’s kids shouldn’t be so open on their social media. Truth! Teddi also invited the women on a retreat, a day and a half of health and fitness fun. In her usual way of begging for people to come, she kept saying she didn’t give a flying if they came or not. Erika said it was a disaster waiting to happen, and I tend to agree. In her interviews, Erika talked about Tom being older, and said she was tired of justifying her twenty-year marriage. She also got her Actor’s Equity contract to play Roxie Hart in Chicago on Broadway. There were some tender moments between her and Tom, and it’s clear she really loves and is thankful for him. She said, the same girl who worked at Shakers was now on Broadway, and actually seemed like a human being in this episode.

Kyle had dinner with Sutton, who I’m not sure about. She told Kyle that she felt like Rumpelstiltskin because she’d just woken up, mixing up her fairytales or legends or whatever, since that’s Rip van Winkle. I guess she never watched Once Upon a Time either. Charlie Sheen filed papers with the court, saying he didn’t want to pay Denise child support, even though he hadn’t paid in forever, and she’d never said a word. Denise also had some serious surgery. A hernia that turned into four hernias, and a six-hour operation, instead of the one and a half she’d been told. She figured the injury was most likely from lifting her special needs child, but she came through fine, albeit in pain. LisaR’s advice: take the pills. Sutton also opened her own boutique, something she’d wanted to do for a long time. The women were in attendance, except for Denise, who was still recovering. In Sutton’s interview, she said she didn’t need to make money, but thought it would be cool if she did. The mayor of WeHo made a speech, and Sutton griped to him about her parking tickets. Because, why not? Teddi carried on about how their coming to the retreat wouldn’t affect her, and I thought it would serve her right if none of them showed up.

Next time, Teddi tries to be chill, and people are following Aaron and Denise

🐪 You Are Here…

How long has it been now? A year? Two? What do you mean, it’s more like a month? You’ve made it this far, you’ll get there. This isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon, or some athletic metaphor. In the meantime, stay safe, stay home, and stay out of trouble, whatever that means to you.

Apr21

April 20, 2020 – Forces Are Joined in Port Charles, Influencers on Deck, Cheri Live, Deckish News, Miami Story & High

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

I missed the beginning, so quickly, her are the highlights. Charlotte is at the MetroCourt with Laura and Lulu, while Ava and Nikolas sit at another table. Nikolas asked Charlotte if the kids were afraid of the snake, but she said they thought it was cool. Chase suggested Willow marry Michael, and said it was her decision, but if she decided not to, she had to step back and let Wiley be Michael’s problem. Anna called Robert, who told her business had called him away, while holding Spinelli against the door. Robert said Spinelli was looking for dirt on Peter. and wanted to know what Spinelli had uncovered so far. I was really disappointed we were shown no panic in the streets because of the snake.

Willow tells Chase, she can’t marry Michael because she’s in love with him, but she can’t step aside and let Wiley be Michael’s problem either. Wiley isn’t a problem; he’s a little boy, unique and wonderful. Seeing him grow and his personality take shape isn’t a problem; it’s a gift. Nelle can’t see that. She believes life has cheated her, and Wiley is her way to get even. That scares Willow as much as Wiley’s heart defect. In some ways, it scares her more.

Nikolas tells Charlotte, he’s sorry they got off on the wrong foot. He’d like to make it up to her. He might not be her secret bodyguard, but they’re still family. Charlotte says, it’s too bad he didn’t tell her that from the start, and turns her back. Ava tells Nikolas, the Borgias were family too, but they still poisoned each other. Nikolas doesn’t think the snake was poisonous, and she asks how he feels about tarantulas. Would he like to snuggle in a bed full of them?

Lulu tells Laura, she didn’t want to say anything in front of Charlotte, but what happened at Laura’s meeting with Valentin? Why did he reach out to Laura, and not her? We flash back to Laura telling Valentin that she deleted the text he’d sent, and came in Lulu’s place. Laura tells Lulu, he didn’t. She intercepted a text intended for Lulu. Lulu asks, why? and Laura says she didn’t want to give Valentin the opportunity to upset Lulu. As it turns out, she thinks Valentin wants the same things they all do; what’s best for Charlotte. Lulu says, Valentin was hoping that Laura would convince her to back off from her petition for full custody? but Laura says, no. It was clear Valentin didn’t plan to go through her. She inserted herself into the situation, and she’s glad she did.

Spinelli tells Robert, Peter and Maxie are going to come back forthwith, and they shouldn’t be there. Robert says Spinelli didn’t see the size of the party. He doubts it. Robert says, admit it; Spinelli is looking for something on Peter. Spinelli says, fine, but so is Robert. Peter is a potential threat to all they hold dear. Dare he say, including Robin’s kith and kin? Since they both want to see Peter get what’s coming to him, what say they stop the squabbling, and join forces?

Maxie says she thinks, as kids parties go, it was pretty successful; the cake, the bounce house, the pony… the goats. Anna says no one expected a snake to come out of Ava’s purse. Maxie thinks it was Nikolas. Everyone knows he and Ava aren’t happily married, but she’s surprised he would do that at a kids party. Peter says it looked like the kids were loving it, and Anna says that’s because Finn intervened before the kids could panic. Robert would have done the same, but he said he got called out to work, although she doubts that’s what it was. Peter flashes back to talking to someone on the phone about distracting Robert. Peter tells Anna, maybe the strain of getting along with him was too much. and Maxie says if it was too much to handle, she’s glad he had the good grace to leave. Peter says he’s just trying to protect Anna, and Anna says, they’re hard wired to protect those they love. Peter says, look at Spinelli. He’s missed no opportunity to say Peter isn’t good enough for Maxie. Maxie says, she set him straight. Peter says, she even threatened to marry him, and Anna asks if she said yes.

Carly asks Michael if Diane doesn’t think it would be important if he gave Wiley a stepmother, to partner with him in providing a safe and secure home. Michael says she does, and Carly says, Willow is not only nurturing and kind, she has the added bonus of a bond with Wiley. He’s known her most of his life; she’s like family to him, and he feels safe with her. Nelle can try, but Willow isn’t just pretty and sweet, but she radiates sincerity. Nelle will look like a phony next to her. Michael says that’s why Willow is going to testify as a character witness and friend, but Carly says, look how much more she could contribute as a wife. He says, what if back in the day, AJ had asked her to marry him, and end things with Jason? She says, that’s not remotely fair, but he asks her to answer. Would she turn her back on Jason, and side with AJ? She says she did. She sued for custody and sided with AJ against Jason. Although she did plan to drive AJ drink to drink, so she could divorce him and get custody of Michael. Michael says, at least don’t pretend it didn’t happen. She says, it blew up in her face, and she almost lost custody of him. He says Willow can’t turn her back on the man she loves to marry him, and Carly says, not even to protect Wiley? We flash back to Michael trying to convince Willow why the marriage is a good idea, and Willow saying, if not for Chase, she’d marry him in a heartbeat. She thinks Chase loves her enough that he would understand, but it’s not about Chase; it’s about her. But if it’s the only way, she’ll do it. Michael tells her, it’s not the only way.

Willow tells Chase, she doesn’t believe Nelle was born bad. She thinks who Nelle is now came from an accumulation of choices. Some, she made herself, but early on, some were made for her. She asks if he knows the saying, hurt people hurt. She thinks it’s true. Nelle was hurt early and often enough, and they all know what she’s capable of. Chase says Willow didn’t turn out like that, and she says, her parents were flaky, not cruel and neglectful. They loved her and taught her what they thought was important. By the time her mother went off the rails with Shiloh and DoD, it was confusing, but it didn’t warp her view of the world. She could still see kindness and love. Chase says, for Nelle, that’s an alien concept. Willow says, what if Nelle does that to Wiley? Takes a beautiful, trusting little boy, and teaches him to be like her?

Maxie tells Anna, she did it to put Spinelli on the spot, not to pressure Peter. Peter says, so she doesn’t want to marry him? and she says, no, it’s not that. She was just explaining why she said it. She hadn’t thought about it. Peter says he had to put Spinelli in his place too. When he was babysitting James, he told Spinelli that he and Maxie are forever. She says he didn’t tell her that, and we flash back to Peter suggesting he and Spinelli hang out some time. They have to be more than cordial, and they’re barely managing. He’s going to be in Georgie’s, James’s, and Maxie’s life permanently. They’re getting married. Peter says, Spinelli was upset and walked out.

Laura tells Lulu, she’s not defending Valentin in any way, but he’s Charlotte’s father, and she loves him. Lulu says, what about him being a terrible influence? but Laura isn’t sure he is. He has his flaws, but he’s a devoted parent. Charlotte is bright and outgoing, and a lot of that is because of him. Valentin walks in, and sees Charlotte. He asks how the party was, and she says she can’t wait to tell him about it. He asks if she’ll go talk to her mom and grandmother for a moment while he has a word with the Cassadines. She goes over to the other table, and Valentin says, stay away from his daughter. Ava says, his little cherub was perfectly fine with them, but Valentin says he doesn’t want Charlotte associating with them. It’s not like Ava is an innocent party. Nikolas says, back off his wife. She’s the innocent party Valentin threw off a parapet. He does remember the night his whole world came crumbling down, doesn’t he?

Jason tells Sonny, Cyrus can’t push Jordan too hard or fast. She could lose her job, and he’d lose the best leverage he has. But Cyrus knows Sonny is under pressure too. He has family in Port Charles, and people he loves who he’s protecting. Everyone is on lockdown, but it can’t last forever. He also knows how Sonny does business; he’s low key and quiet. That might put him in a position where he has to negotiate. Sonny says, only to a point.

Sonny says, he’d rather avoid a war. It’s bad for business, it costs money, and people make mistakes. Some don’t learn. If Cyrus wants to fight, Sonny will take him down like he has everybody before him. Jason asks if he’s going to refuse the meeting, but Sonny says, set it up for tonight. They’ll see how motivated Cyrus is, and go from there. Carly comes in, and asks if she’s interrupting. Jason says they were just finishing up, and tells Sonny, he’ll make the call. He leaves, and Carly asks if everything is okay. Sonny says, it’s business; he’s handling it. Carly tells him, Wiley will probably come home tomorrow, and nothing has gotten better regarding the custody hearing. The best option is one Michael won’t pursue.

Valentin tells Nikolas, everyone knows they sleep in separate beds, and spend their days ripping each other apart. He walks away, and Ava says, it sounds like the marriage they both deserve. Nikolas says they have no more secrets, but Ava says, one or two, but maybe it’s time to review things, and make changes.

Lulu asks what Ava and Nikolas said to Charlotte, and she says, nothing much. They’re just saying mean things to each other. It’s not fair. Windymere was better when she, papa, and Nina were there. Lulu says, drastic change can be unsettling. She knows how it feels, and hates when it happens. Valentin stops by, and Lulu says Charlotte is dying to tell him about the birthday party. Charlotte wishes he could have been there. He missed all the fun. He says, cake, ice cream, and games? but she says, that wasn’t the fun part. Lulu says, there was the snake, and Valentin says, Ava didn’t mention there was a snake. Lulu says, it was in Ava’s purse. They have no idea how it got there. Valentin looks at Charlotte like, hmm…

Robert asks why he would pair up with Spinelli when his scheme failed? He’s a wiz in cyberspace, but when he’s on the ground, he’s out of his depth. Spinelli says the criticism is warranted, and Robert says, they’re looking out for the people they care about. Robert stumbled on him, and if it was that easy, Peter could do the same. We flash back to Peter suggesting that if he and Spinelli can’t tolerate each other, Maxie will be forced to make a choice. He’s comfortable with that. Is Spinelli? Spinelli tells Robert, he’s not afraid of Peter, but Robert says, he should be. He not only comes from bad stock, he aided and abetted Shiloh, and put Drew in the ground. Spinelli says he’s acting on behalf of his daughter, and Robert asks how he’s going to do that if Robert arrests him? Spinelli says, it’s Robert’s choice, but he might have to explain why he was breaking and entering. Robert calls Spinelli a little runt, and asks if Spinelli is trying to blackmail him. Spinelli supposes he is.

Willow tells Chase, she’s seen it over and over, parents influencing a child for better or worse. There’s a kid in the hospital, he’s bright, and his parents want to find him a tutor so he gets into a good college. Did she mention he’s twelve? She’s watched the parents crush his creativity, possibly his soul. There’s nothing she can say, but with Wiley, it’s different. She can have a say. He says, only if Michael wins, and she says she doesn’t need to marry him. Michael told her that she didn’t. He has the best lawyers and resources, and he’s sure he can be heard. Which is what she needs to tell herself instead of freaking out over the worst case. Chase says, sounds like a plan, and she says, speaking of plans, the wine guy texted her, and there’s a good bottle ordered for tonight. He asks when wine guy started texting her? and she says, don’t be jealous. They kiss, and Chase says he’ll have the wine waiting when she gets home. Willow starts to walk away, but turns back. She thanks him for the talk. She needed it more than she knew.

Maxie tells Anna, the kids want to stay and play with Violet some more. They’re due for a major sugar crash, so Peter put their shoes on. When the kids are ready, they can just scoop them up and go. Anna compliments Maxie’s parenting skills, and Maxie says it was Peter’s idea. Anna says she knows it’s difficult for Peter to be comfortable with a loving family, she’s glad he’s adjusted. Maxie asks, what’s wrong? and Anna says they’re dancing around the idea of marriage. She understands that as adults, they try to protect their hearts, but words like married and forever mean more to Peter than Maxie realizes or Peter knows. Peter comes back downstairs, and says, the kids are ready. What did he miss?

Valentin asks Charlotte, what about a snake? Laura’s phone rings, and she says she has to take it. She steps away, and Lulu says she’d like to speak to Nikolas, giving Valentin her seat. He asks how Charlotte supposes the snake got in Ava’s purse? She says, it wasn’t poisonous, and he asks how she knows. She says they’ve been studying them in science. He says, that explains something. He gets alerts whenever Charlotte makes a purchase. He knows she bought something at Roger’s Reptile Roundabout.

Lulu asks if Ava is okay after the snake thing. Ava thanks her for asking; she appreciates Lulu’s concern. She looks at Nikolas, who says he thinks it was a prank, albeit in bad taste. Lulu says, no real damage was done. Like when Nikolas told Charlotte that he was her secret bodyguard, and made her believe he’d always be there, except when she threw herself in the harbor and he was nowhere around. Nikolas says he apologized, and Lulu says, to her, but not to Charlotte. Ava says he just tried to, but he’d stayed away out of concern for Charlotte’s well-being. Lulu says, he never gave Charlotte a second thought, except as a means to take down her father. She has no sympathy for Valentin, but Nikolas isn’t much better. Ava asks who Lulu is to judge. What makes her the arbiter of right and wrong? Back the hell off.

Willow arrives at the hospital, and Michael says, perfect timing. He was just going to text her. He asks if there’s any chance they could meet up tonight, and talk through her testimony, so she gets an idea what he’s hoping for before she’s grilled on the stand. She asks if there’s any chance they could do it tomorrow. She and Chase have plans.

Sasha approaches Chase in the park, wearing a button-down shirt in a plaid that I’m in love with, and Chase says, Michael told Willow that he can beat Nelle without marrying her. Sasha says, he’s lying, and Chase says he figured. Nelle is emotionally damaged, and she’s going to emotionally damage Wiley. It will destroy Willow, and possibly break her. Sasha says, Michael too, and he says, they’re the only ones in the position to stop it. Is she good with that? She says, good? No, but she’s absolutely committed.

Maxie says, Peter spoiled the surprise. Anna saved them four goodie bags; he gets the one with the licorice whistle. He says he hates licorice, and she says she knows. She tells him to get the car, while she gets the sleepyheads. He tells Anna, it was an exhausting experience, but fun. She says, one of many more. He says he knows she’s worried, and she says she’s seen how hard he’s worked to be the man he is. She’s not letting anyone take that from him.

Robert tells Spinelli, he doesn’t respond well to threats, and Spinelli suggests he consider the advantages of working together to safeguard the ones they hold dear. Robert says Spinelli is a loose cannon and a kook. Spinelli says, in cyberspace, he has no equal. They can take down that lying weasel once and for all, if they combine their skills. He suggests they shake on their most fearsome partnership, but Robert says, it’s not partnership. If he says, jump, Spinelli asks, how high. Is he clear? Spinelli says, crystal. He has one small suggestion; that they search in haste before Peter and Maxie get back. But Robert says, whatever Peter is hiding, it’s not there. They leave, and in the hallway, Robert’s phone rings. He asks, who is this?

Ava tells Nikolas, his family needs a reset. Instead of having Laura and Doc for dinner, why don’t they have a big event? A spring fling at Windymere. She can unveil her new portrait. Lulu says, she has a portrait? and Nikolas says, Franco is painting it. Ava says they’ll have to invite Franco and Elizabeth, and Lulu says, Elizabeth and Nikolas were close, back when Elizabeth was a good influence on him. Too bad he takes after Ava now. She leaves, and Nikolas says, actually, it’s ridiculous for Ava to unveil her portrait. Don’t expect his family to show up to celebrate.

Valentin says, Charlotte bought a snake, and she says, yes, but it was for the classroom terrarium. All of the kids contributed. He tells her, don’t lie. That’s not the reason. She put it in Ava’s purse; why? She says she doesn’t like Ava. She’s not family, and she and Nikolas are big, fat liars. They’re thieves, and stole everything. Now Valentin and Nina will never get married.

Carly tells Sonny, Wiley is out of danger, but will probably need additional surgery. She knows what it’s like, and they have to stay vigilant. They can’t afford for Nelle to get custody. They can’t trust her to make important decisions concerning Wiley. Sonny says, Diane will make that argument to the judge, and do it better. She says, Diane said Michael’s chances are slightly more than 50%. Sonny says, Diane always gives the worst case, so she looks better. Carly says, she’d agree if it was a criminal case, but this is family court. What if the judge believes Nelle’s sob story? She could win joint custody.

Michael tells Willow, it’s totally fine. They’ll set something up for another time. He says, it’s Wiley’s last night in the hospital; he gets to go home tomorrow. maybe she wants to say hi. She says, tomorrow will be Wiley’s first night home, and the last night they can discuss her testimony. Michael says he thought it would be hopeful to talk through it, but the best thing she can do is be herself. She asks what time he wants to meet, and he says they don’t have to. She says she wants to, and Chase will understand. Maybe they can bring the wine by tomorrow, and the four of them can celebrate Wiley’s homecoming. Michael says, sounds like a plan.

Peter asks Maxie what she and Anna were really talking about. Maxie says Anna was reminding her of how special he is, and they kiss.

Anna answers the door to Robert, who looks awful. She asks, what is it? and he says he has terrible news. Holly is dead. Anna hugs him.

Ava tells Nikolas, just when she thought they had a shot at being civil, he resorts to sniping insults. He says he struck a nerve, and she says he can doggy paddle to Spoon Island. She’s taking the launch, but don’t expect it back anytime soon.

Valentin tells Charlotte, he knows she’s disappointed. He is too, but it’s not entirely Ava’s fault. She asks why he’s making excuses for Ava. Ava is his enemy.

Jason comes back, and tells Sonny, it’s all set. Carly says, please be careful. Sonny’s phone rings. It’s Turning Woods, and he asks if it’s about his father. He listens, and says he’ll be right there. He tells Carly and Jason, his dad had another fall. They think it was a seizure.

Willow walks into the apartment, saying, she hopes Chase didn’t open the wine yet. She finds Sasha and a shirtless Chase lying down on the couch, kissing.

Tomorrow, Charlotte tells Valentin, it’s not what he said, it’s what he did; Josslyn asks what strategy Michael is talking about; and Cyrus tells Julian, they have an opportunity for collaboration.

Below Deck Sailing Yacht

I’m going to start calling Captain Glenn just Glenn going forward. Maybe it’s not noticeable, but I’ve always put Captain in front of Lee and Sandy’s names out of respect. I was doing the same for Glenn, but in this episode, I found out he doesn’t really like being addressed that way. TBH, it makes it easier on me too, but if he hadn’t given his okay, I wouldn’t have changed it.

Glenn tells Parker that he has an attitude problem, and he’s on thin ice already. Glenn isn’t convinced Parker can do the job, but it’s up to him. Parker says he’s trying to determine if he should take his tips and run finish on this note, or chance it, where he’ll be under twice as much pressure. Life too short to be around people who don’t want to be around him. Glenn says, it’s his decision if he wants to give his resignation. In his interview, Glenn says he doesn’t like to lead by fear. He wants Parker to take ownership of his decision. He tells Parker to take some time to think about it.

Madison wants to stay outside the boat drama. Adam is wondering if Parker is going to be packing his sh*t. Georgia wants to say goodbye if Parker is going. In Madison’s interview, she says it bothers her that Parker could be getting fired. He’s had her back on the boat. She and Ciara lie in the sun on deck. Parker radios Glenn, and says as far as his well-being goes, he thinks he needs to resign. Glenn says he understands, and in Parker’s interview, he says certain people have expressed they don’t need him. He thinks it’s effed up, and he doesn’t want his attitude to put him in a situation where he gets fired. He gives Glenn an it’s-not-you-it’s-me speech, and Glenn says he thinks it’s the best decision for Parker. In Glenn’s interview, he says he’s relieved. If Parker doesn’t feel he can change, the best thing is to get a replacement. He hopes Parker can learn to get on with people; it’s a part of any industry. Parker tells Paget that he’s resigning, and says goodbye. Paget mumbles that he’ll just get another d*ckhead. Parker tells Adam that he’s taking a sabbatical. He suggests Adam and Jenna have a baby, so he can be a weird uncle. I’m sure that’s an innocent remark, but he might want to rephrase that. Adam says he likes this Parker better. In Adam’s interview, he says he’s not surprised Parker couldn’t cut it. He’s surprised it took this long though. Glenn says, it takes a special breed of person to do this, and not lose their cool.

Madison asks, what’s going on? and Parker says he’s resigning. She says she’s going to miss him, and they hug. In her interview, she says, there goes her buddy. Now she and Georgia are officially the third couple on the boat. Paget tells Ciara he thinks Parker will be happier for it, and everyone else will too. In Ciara’s interview, she says she’s not surprised, but she’s disappointed he didn’t stick it out. Madison tells him, go be a rock star. In Parker’s interview, he says he didn’t quit. He resigned, and there’s a difference. Quitting is an act you do when you’re scared. Resigning means stopping… with positive energy. I don’t know whether to give him a pacifier and a blankie, or a smiley face T-shirt. He says he doesn’t know what’s next. He’s going to rekindle his love of the perfect girl for him, and being the best Parker he can be. I guess I’ll just park(er) him in front of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood reruns.

Glenn gets on the phone, and says he’s looking for someone asap. Jenna says, all of Parker’s sh*t has to be cleaned, and in her interview, Georgia says, they haven’t even laid him in the ground yet. The crew gets ready for dinner.

Paget says, Parker took the easy way out. He likes training people, but it was a waste of time. They go on shore, and find a restaurant. There’s an empty chair, and Jenna says she guesses Parker didn’t feel like coming. Paget says Parker actually made the decision. He lasted this long, and Paget tried to help him as much as he could. Jenna says, if you don’t have the type of personality that fits in, you get cut. In Madison’s interview, she asks, why are they sh*tting on someone who can’t defend themselves? Jenna says, the number one tip is, STFU. Byron says, that’s great advice. Ciara and Paget, and Jenna and Adam decide to go back to the boat. Georgia and Madison go to a club, and drink some more. On the boat, Adam and Jenna change and retire to the master. In his interview, Adam tells us, when you slide into the sweat pant phase, you know you love each other. Madison and Georgia meander back to the boat.

The next morning, Adam says, no Parker, no skidmarks, no problems. Glenn tells Jenna, he’s glad Parker made the call, because he would have had to. He’s got a British guy lined up; Chris. In Glenn’s interview, he says he expects the crew to be friendly and welcoming. He wants to make sure what happened with Parker doesn’t happen again. They check out Chris’s Instagram, and he looks like a fun and adventurous dude. Paget says, no breastfeeding jokes. Jenna asks if Georgia will flirt with the new guy, and Georgia says that’s natural for her. She says, he’d better not be an absolute d*ck or an absolute bitch.

Paget meets Chris on the dock, and in his interview, Paget says, working on yachts, coming in mid-season can be tricky. Either you make friends for life, or enemies you want to throw off the boat. He says Chris seems to be sunshiny, but once you’ve been in the industry for a while, you become a grumpy bastard. Madison tells Chris, welcome to the craziness. Paget asks if he has any issues, and Chris says he has a dodgy back, but he does stretches and keeps moving. Paget says he’s seen that a lot in the industry. Madison and Georgia feed each other strawberries in the galley. In Paget’s interview, he says Chris has got experience, and knows a lot. It’s refreshing. He shows Chris around the boat.

Glenn has a preference sheet meeting with Jenna, Adam, Byron, and Paget. The primary is Lyndi, a wardrobe consultant and blogger. Her boyfriend Jesse, and friends Missy and Jonathan will be joining them. Apparently the women are well-known influencers. They’re looking forward to jumping off the boat, and also want to post pictures and videos to their blogs. In his interview, Glenn says he’s not a selfie person. He doesn’t like being in photos. Me neither. Paget says, they also want a scenic background during dinner. Jenna says, Lyndi wants a Coachella party, with entertainment, and Glenn suggests Paget and Georgia provide it.

In the crew mess, Adam asks Chris if he has any food restrictions, and Chris says, no. Adam says, good; he wouldn’t fix it anyway, and goes into the galley. Georgia says, it’s okay to use the hot tub when there are no guests, and Madison says, apparently, it’s okay to use the master too. Adam says he can hear her, and if she has a problem, she can talk to him. She says she doesn’t care, and he says, then stop talking about it. He asks if she can go a day without creating some kind drama. In Adam’s interview, he says, if Jenna says they can use the master, then they can. Madison’s opinion is on the deepest back burner. Madison says she wasn’t talking sh*t. He asks if she can go thirty minutes. In Madison’s interview, she asks, what boat have they been on that using the master is okay? Everyone goes to bed, and being Adam’s new roommate, Chris says he doesn’t want to piss off the chef.

The next morning, Chris is ready for a fun day. Jenna asks if he gets offended if anyone curses. He isn’t, but wonders about the question. Paget says, Georgia flirts with any guy who has a penis. Chris thinks it’s the right level of crazy, and Georgia says, it’s a good start. Glenn thinks things will be fine. Adam tells Jenna about Madison telling the crew they were sleeping in the master, and he said he could effing hear her. Georgia decides to help with the cushion covers. Adam says he told Madison if she wants to talk, bring it up to her. In Jenna’s interview, she says during the last charter, Madison worked to turn herself around, and now she’s injecting herself into Jenna’s personal life. Mind your own business. She jokes-not-jokes, Madison must be punished for this behavior. Chris asks how the captain prefers to be addressed, and Glenn says, just Glenn. Paget says he doesn’t like a title; he’s human like the rest of them. Jenna tells Georgia she wants her to be more involved in service.

Provisions come in. Jenna tells Madison that Georgia wants to learn more about service. In Madison’s interview, she says, suddenly, Georgia wants to learn about service? It can’t be because Madison and Adam had a tiff. Interesting. Glenn tells everyone to change into their polos, and the guests arrive. Madison says, smile and wave. Adam says, they’re from southern California, and Chris asks if they’ll be difficult. Adam says, it’s about as difficult as America gets. In Adam’s interview, he says, high maintenance has a walk and a look. It just walked on the boat. Jenna gives the tour.

Adam makes fruit and cheese plates, and Glenn says they’ll get going soon. While hanging up the guests’ clothing, Georgia marvels at how neatly they packed. In Jenna’s interview, she says, hashtag, cute; hashtag, yacht party. She bets they’re good at living their authentic lives. The boat shoves off. Adam tells the guests to be prepared to eat a lot, and Lyndi  thinks he’s adorable, but he’s going to get her fat. He says, if he’s making it, she’s eating it.

In his interview, Chris says he spent his teen years sailing and racing. The last racing boat he was on was very 80s. It was everything physical, and gives him the tingles. Lyndi squeaks to the other women that Adam is adorable, and they go in search of him. Jenna tells Adam, omigod! So cute! and he says, have no fear. That’s not his style. Georgia sees them kiss, and walks past the galley faster. The sails go up. Ciara tells Glenn about the sails, and in his interview, he says he doesn’t want to stop Ciara. It’s good to learn new things about a boat, but some things, he knows. Glenn explains sailing to the guests, and Adam says starboard is his favorite lean; he leans into his cutting board.

Ciara says she’s glad to have someone who knows what they’re doing on deck. Missy giggles, and asks where the galley is. Jenna discourages them in a roundabout way. Glenn tells the deckhands to set up the rope swing, and Jesse is first to jump in the water, followed by Jonathan, while the girls giggle (there’s no better word for it). I swear, it’s only been five minutes, but if I hear cute one more time… Ciara puts deodorant on the outside of her thermal top, and I feel confused. In Glenn’s interview, he says he’s just figured out Instagram, and he knows the guests are concerned with how their photos look. He’s thinking if the stern is pointed toward the town during dinner, the town will be lit up, and make a great background. The trick is a good stern tie. You put a chain over a rock, attach a line, and bring it back to the boat. It sounds easy, but in practice, it never is. He asks the deckhands to tie the stern. Paget tells Chris that his spirit is helping them; he’s impressed. In Paget’s interview, he says there are multiple things going on at once, and he’s the eyes of the operation from the tender. The NautiBuoy (floating platform) starts hitting the rocks. Chris jumps onto it, and Glenn radios Paget that he’s Glenn’s eyes and ears; he needs the information. Paget is pissed at himself; it’s embarrassing. What a sh*t show. In Glenn’s interview, he says Paget did a great job, but he’s suffering from agitation. He let it get to him. He tells Byron, Paget is puling a Parker.

Meanwhile, at a nearby island, Parker and Kaiti do some snorkeling. Parker proposes underwater, and she says yes. In his interview, Parker says she’s the perfect girl for him. She loves him being ridiculous. She parties hard, and loves all people. She loves the planet, nature, and animals.

In Glenn’s interview, he says, it’s encouraging to see Chris in the mix. Chris knows what he’s doing. If this is any indication how he’s going to perform for the rest of the season, they’re in good hands. Adam tells Madison what place settings are needed, and Glenn helps the deckhands move out chairs for dinner, as well as putting several tables together for a dining table. Jenna puts on a tablecloth, and uses tiny grapevine balls with fairy lights in the centerpiece. I love them. I have those hanging on my back patio.

Jesse tells Lyndi that he loves her, and she says… okay. What? Some little woman named Evangyline, or something like that, takes photos. I don’t know who she is, but her appearance is the complete opposite of these statuesque blondes. She toasts to amazing friends. Missy says there’s a space in her heart that they fill, and Lyndi says some corny stuff. I can’t take their voices. Adam brings up the first course. Georgia does laundry. Jesse posts a bunch of content, and the girls are upset that he didn’t tag them. He says he doesn’t know how the tag machine works. Missy squeals when Adam comes up with the entrée. Lyndi says she loves him. It’s swordfish and asparagus, so I love him too. Jesse tells her, lock it up, and she says she’ll do the opposite. She’ll do what Adam tells her to do. Jesse asks if he means nothing, and she wants someone else. Tell him now. In Jenna’s interview, she says they’re in an argument about her boyfriend, and it’s super awkward. Her boyfriend is off the table.

Next time, Chris asks if Georgia wants to go to a fish foot spa, Madison say she’s in a coupled-up crew, Jesse asks Lyndi to marry him, and Adam acts stupid.

📡 I’m loving Watch What Happens Live these days, with everyone filming from home. Not only do I get to see something personal about the guests, everyone seems extra relaxed. Well, except for Kristen Johnston, who gripped her dog for dear life. Tonight, the show ended with Cheri Oteri doing her Barbara Walters impression, while her dog suddenly began to photobomb from the patio door. It was priceless.

⛵️ Beyond the Sail…

Parker has moved on from his mom. Maybe.

https://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/parker-mccown-engaged-below-deck-sailing-yacht-recap

Meet new deckhand Chris.

https://decider.com/2020/04/20/below-deck-sailing-yacht-new-deckhand-chris-miller/

🏝 Leaving Miami…

A vague explanation as to why The Real Housewives of Miami is no more.

https://www.realitytea.com/2020/04/20/andy-cohen-explains-why-real-housewives-of-miami-stopped-filming/

🚬 Smoke ‘Em If You Got ‘Em…

I’d be remiss in not giving a nod to 420 2020. Warning: Lyrics may be offensive. But I find this song funny as hell. Stay safe out there, in there, or up there.

Apr18

April 17, 2020 – The Shahs Do Hawaii, WOTN, Found, All About Garcelle, Busy Docs, Vicky Stalled, Second Time, BH BS, Years Of Wives, Moneymaker, Go Pink, Broadway Cares, Eight Whole Quotes & Seven Days

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

Shahs of Sunset

Mike and Paulina go for coffee with pup Whiskey, who is absolutely adorable and surprisingly well-behaved. Mike asks how she felt about seeing everyone at Boots and Brews, and we flash back to that. Paulina thinks they’re dramatic, and Mike says they’ve gone through so much drama, the friendships have been tainted somewhat, but he still loves them. in Mike’s interview, he says they have to start communication, healing, and moving forward. He tells Paulina that he’s planned a trip for her birthday to Hawaii, and she says, how fun. He tells her that he’s invited the crew, and she says Mike is in his early 40s. Come on. He says, it will be an excuse to regroup. The bullsh*t is getting old. In his interview, he says, it’s common sense that just the two of them on the trip would be romantic, but he loves his friends, and wants to show them a great time. Risking Paulina’s love for the love of his friends is a catch-22. He tells her that he wants to share their happiness with his friends, and start fresh. She says, they’ll make it fun.

Nema and Mona’s mom Moshgan is visiting from upstate new York. In his interview, Nema says, when his mom comes to town, she likes to soak up family and kid time. Moshgan says, it’s been the best trip, and she’s been getting in some sun worship. Nema says they’d love it if she made it a permanent thing. Mona says, when she has kids, Moshgan is going to move there. Moshgan tells Nema, if he doesn’t have kids, when he gets old he’ll just have his dog. In Nema’s interview, he says after their parents divorced, his sister stayed with his mom in New York, while he went with their dad to California. It caused damage and trauma that he can’t put into words. Nema says he doesn’t want to upset Moshgan, but his childhood was so traumatic, it strengthened his resolve not to have kids. Moshgan says she’s sorry, but he can’t use what happened in the past to affect what happens with the rest if his life. Nema says it’s hard to hear her say, just get over it, but she says she’s not saying that. She wrote him a letter two years ago about what happened. It was emotional, and it took time; did he read it? He says, it’s frustrating for him to hear that it’s been two years. In his interview, he says he’s too worried about what it says to read it. He’s afraid he’ll read something he can’t come back from. It might taint his relationship with his dad, which is already not strong. Moshgan says, if he wants to know what happened, read her six-page letter.

Destiney meets with MJ at a smoothie place. MJ says she likes Destiney’s energy, and feels like they’re on the same page. She wants them to be good friends in a good place. A lot of lies happened, and it’s where things went south. In MJ’s interview, she says she apologized to Reza at Boots and Brews. We flash back to that, and MJ says, now she wants to open the line of communication, and fix things with Destiney. She tells Destiney, she’s  there to apologize, and be transparent. Something small between Ali and Reza evolved into giant nonsense toxic bullsh*t. After the crying and confrontation that happened, she doesn’t want it to be the same thing. In Destiney’s interview, she says she thought she and MJ were like sisters. We see clips from their relationship over the years, and Destiney says, MJ hurt and betrayed her. MJ doesn’t see it, or she’s acting like she doesn’t, and Destiney doesn’t trust her. She tells MJ, she thought MJ had her back, and they were sisters, then sh*t happened. Ali walks in, and Destiney looks shocked. In her interview, Destiney says whatever MJ and Ali have cooked up, she wants no part of it.

MJ goes to the counter to order, and Ali asks how Destiney is. In MJ’s interview, she says, ultimately, she wants both of them in her life. She’s missed Destiney, and her intention is to fix this. When she comes back to the table, MJ says she wants full transparency from everyone. Destiney says she wants to figure out what’s going on, and where they all stand. MJ says she knew Ali had an issue with Reza, and wanted to talk to Destiney, so she said, go for it, but be ready to be real. Destiney says she let her emotions take ahold of her, and regrets how it came off. MJ says, the negativity has been toxic and poisonous. From her perspective of the big picture, Ali had been a close friend, but told Reza she’d said she was concerned about his marriage. Ali says he did improvise there, and MJ tells him, don’t drag her name into it, and say it’s about her concerns. In Destiney’s interview, she says, MJ is making sh*t up to save herself. Ali had said MJ put him up to it, but now he’s kissing MJ’s ass. Ali says he’s sorry he drew that conclusion, and MJ says she wants to be friends, and be on the same page. She asks Destiney if she can have a hug, and Destiney reluctantly gets up. They hug, and Destiney asks MJ to promise she has good intentions. In her interview, Destiney says she wants to believe MJ has good intentions, but deep down, she’s not comfortable.

Adam comes home to Reza, Smokey, and Miss Moo. In Reza’s interview, he wishes he could say things are amazing, but they’re not. He tells Adam that he’s going to be gone next week, so no naked Jenga when he’s not there. In his interview, Reza says he’s committed to and loves his husband. He hopes in time, this will be a distant memory. He asks Adam when they’re going to play naked Jenga, and Adam says he wants to have a conversation about that. Reza says he sounds serious, but Adam says, not as serious as Reza is making it sound, and they sit. Adam says when he went through his texts, he saw Ali was right. He did mention naked whatever, but he said immediately that he was joking. Reza says he doesn’t care about Ali; he cares about Adam doing things that make people think he doesn’t have respect for their marriage. He doesn’t like finding out his husband was potentially engaging in inappropriate behavior. People divorce over these kinds of issues, and it literally plants the seed of doubt and paranoia in someone’s head. Adam asks Reza to stop and listen, instead of shutting down. When Reza gets angry, he doesn’t listen. He interrupts and says Adam’s not making sense. He says he knows Reza mentioned a trip to Hawaii, and Reza says it would be making more of a statement if he didn’t go, and would become a big deal. He and MJ were at the Boots and Brews thing together, and he doesn’t want it to be an issue in the group. Adam says he needs to get something off his chest. He never wants MJ there again. Reza says, it’s Adam’s house too. If Adam doesn’t want her there, no problem. Right now, they’re not in a great place anyway. Adam says, if MJ and Reza get back to a good place, that’s fine, but he doesn’t want her to be around. He can never talk to her again; not even a hello. In his interview, Reza says he wants to respect his husband, but at the same time, he has a yearning for someone who used to be bigger in his life, and it’s something painful to process.

Nema and Mike head into a clinic, and Nema says, real men get Botox together. In Mike’s interview, he says he’s 41, and wants to keep it looking young. Nema says he’s stoked for Hawaii. Mike asks if Mona is coming, but Nema says Mona is mad at him. He sent his parents a text saying they screwed up his life; he has a lot of anger under the surface. Mike says he uses it to justify keeping his life from them. Nema says, if he didn’t care, it would be easy, and Mike says, it’s causing stress, and stress is going to kill him. In his interview, Mike says Nema is a good dude, but he doesn’t understand his Persian parents. They had to flee their country, and started with nothing. It’s hard for people to understand the struggles they face. He tells Nema, when you’re young and in a new country with no money, it’s difficult. They didn’t know any better; he can’t blame them. He needs to have an open heart and mind. Nema says his mom wrote him a letter, talking about her feelings on her end. In Nema’s interview, he says he was finally ready to read it, but it was frustrating. He reads from the letter, his mom writing that watching him leave was the hardest experience of her life, and has haunted her for twenty-five years. She was only twenty-five and powerless. She went back and forth to see him, and worked 70 and 80 hours a week, often the third shift, in order to afford the trip, because she had no assistance. Nema says, but it doesn’t address why he and Mona were separated. He hates the letter because it doesn’t give him an ounce of closure. Mike says, life is short. He prays Nema finds it in his heart to forgive. Come to Hawaii, and chill out. Nema says he’s going to eat his body weight in sushi. The doctor comes in, and Nema says they’re here for a tune-up. Mike looks skeptical, but gets the Botox. He says, Hawaii, here we come.

Destiney, Sara, GG, and MJ meet Paulina for a girls night out. Mike told her to go for a night out with the girls before they leave, and just have a good time. In Destiney’s interview, she says since she and Sara’s brother are no longer talking, hopefully Sara will be in a better mood. They sit outside, and MJ says it’s her first girls night out since having the baby. Tommy’s dad is watching Shams. In GG’s interview, she says MJ doing what she did is one thing – we flash back to MJ’s concern for GG when she got sick at Boots and Brews – but her taking it as an honest gesture is another thing. She’s definitely over having enemies. It’s a heavy burden to carry. They clink glasses, and toast to girls night; no boys. There’s silence, and Sara says, it’s gorgeous, but chilly, and they decide to go inside. MJ shows them how she can line her lips without using a mirror, and GG says she has skills. MJ asks if GG is feeling better, and GG says, it was an effed up situation. Paulina says she didn’t know anything about it, and GG explains that she had her fallopian tubes removed. The baby was seven weeks when she ruptured, so she’d barely been pregnant. It was a fluke of nature, since ectopic pregnancies are rare. MJ is sorry that GG went through that. In MJ’s interview, she says she feels compassion for everything GG has been through. She tells GG, it sucks they’re not closer. They could have had their experiences together. GG says she’s sorry, and admits there’s a jealousy factor. She would have rather had a child at the end. She’s read to give a baby love. MJ says she’s sure it will be a reality for GG soon, and asks if she can give GG a hug. When they hug, MJ says she didn’t know GG was getting pregnant, and GG asks if that would have made MJ not be mean to her. In her interview, GG says, for many years, she and MJ had a toxic friendship, but GG is a different person now. She doesn’t want MJ as an enemy or a friend. The best thing is to let it go. The girls toast to Paulina’s birthday.

Nema goes to see therapist Todd. He tells Todd that his mom is in town. He wishes it meant more than it does, but he’s frustrated and on edge. Todd asks how often Nema has discussed it with his mom, and Nema says she wrote him a letter on her feelings. She said, when his parents were going through the break-up, Nema’s dad reached out to his grandfather for assistance, and suggested his dad do him the favor of taking the kids to Iran for a month, while they figured things out. She was against it, but they convinced her it was a good idea not to let the kids see them fighting. It was only supposed to be one month, while they figured it out. His first response was wondering how one month turned into nine. His second response was that he’s thirty-six, and still dealing with the fallout. That they did this because they didn’t want the kids to see them arguing makes him angry, and prevents him from having a conversation with them. He’s more angry at his dad. He has an early memory of going to the grocery store with his grandfather, and there being an Iranian guard with an AK-47, watching people. Todd says, he’s in this new world, and the transition didn’t include a conversation about it. His mom laid it out, and wants him to understand where she’s coming from. Nema doesn’t want to be mad, but can’t avoid it. Nema says he has two volumes. One is, he doesn’t give a sh*t, and the other is, listen MF’er. It’s either zero or ten. Todd says, when we bury emotions, they manifest, and he needs to release it. Nema says, the status quo isn’t working. In his interview, Nema says he’s tired of being the victim of what’s happened to him. He’s been angry too long. Todd says if he has a conflict, he needs to put it out there and articulate what’s bothering him. In Nema’s interview, he says he needs his parents to come together, so he can ask why they did it, and tell them why it was wrong. That’s closure. He tells Todd, one step at a time.

As Mike packs, he realizes he always wears black T-shirts. Paulina says, that’s all he needs.

Reza packs 10,000 pairs of shoes. In his interview, he says, he’s not excited about the trip. He and MJ barely scratched the surface in moving forward, but their history makes it worth going.

MJ tells assistant Sienna, it’s weird. Hawaii is where she wanted to go with Reza, Adam, and Tommy, since neither couple had a honeymoon. Obviously, they’re not going on a honeymoon together. In her interview, she says, hopefully, they’ll get where they need to be. She tells Sienna, they’re going to be staying at a multimillion dollar property, and she wants to get back to when their moments of having fun and making fun of each other. She’s not leaving her newborn for no reason. She’s investing in their friendship. In MJ’s interview, she says she doesn’t want to leave Baby Shams for five minutes, but she knows she needs to do this for the friendship. She’ll do or say whatever it takes to help fix things.

Mike says when they travel as a group, they always act the fool. He’s hoping everyone gets along, and Paulina experiences the amazingness of his friends that he’s told her about. In Reza’s interview, he says he plans to be cordial, and ease into interaction with MJ. They fly to the island of Hawaii, and take a limo bus to the property.

Homeowner Goldie greets them, and they’re given leis by the cultural attaché Stephanie. In Nema’s interview, he says, the vibe with MJ and Reza is like an unexpected run-in with an ex. You don’t expect it to be cool, but it’s awkward. Stephanie welcomes them, and says they’re going to do a traditional Hawaiian greeting. They’re to pair up, and touch foreheads, nose to nose; inhale and exhale, then hug. In his interview, Reza says he was hoping to ease into the interaction, but it’s like, boom! Forehead to forehead. Nema and GG face each other. In his interview, Nema says he and GG are in a great place now. In GG’s interview, she says, after a few drinks, she could see Nema as bedroom worthy, but that’s as far as she’ll go.

MJ texts Tommy, asking how Shams is. I covet GG’s headband with two palm trees sticking up from it. Tommy texts back that Shams is great, and tells MJ to have fun. As usual, the food spread is fabulous, as is the property. Everything is beyond. Nema says, it’s going to be fat Nema resurrected in Hawaii. GG says she got fun headbands for the girls, and tattoos for the guys. MJ chooses a headband with flamingos, and I want that one too. Reza approaches MJ, and says he wants a grown up conversation with two people who are special to him. He asks why MJ and Destiney are still engaging with someone who didn’t have his best interest at heart? We flash back to two minutes ago, when Destiney, Ali, and MJ got together, and in Destiney’s interview, she says she tells Reza everything. MJ wonders, instead of confronting his friend of thirty years, why isn’t he saying Ali must be full of sh*t? Why didn’t he come to her? Reza asks why MJ and Ali are super tight, and in MJ’s interview, she says few people showed up at her father’s deathbed. Ali showed up in ways none of her other friends did. MJ says Reza has done stuff to her in the past, but when he came for her, she did nothing. There are certain things she resents, but if she wanted to get mad and screw him over, she would have done it then.

Mike says, this is killing him, and Paulina asks if they’re done. Everyone disperses, and Mike tells them to figure out the room situation among themselves. The rooms are incredible, and the views are stunning. I can’t imagine ever being rich enough to go there, but if that happened, you’d have a hard time prying me out. MJ tells Reza, he’s literally the worst. Reza asks, how? He’s apologizing, and owning every bit. MJ asks where was the call she deserved? Reza says she should have told him that she was feeling five kinds of ways, and she says she wanted him to be in the delivery room. He says he wanted to be, and it broke his heart. In Reza’s interview, he says he didn’t go to see MJ in the hospital because they weren’t in a good place. We flash back to Reza calling MJ while she was recovering, and grilling her about Ali. MJ says she saw him making a huge choice not get clarity from her, but they both lacked empathy. Reza says, it’s unimaginable that his closest friend entertained someone who did something not positive to him. The outcome was sh*tty and effed up. He wants to own his part in that, and that it affected her life in a negative way. MJ says she didn’t think about what he was going through, since she was wrapped up in what she going through. Reza says that’s all he needed. From the bottom of his heart, he forgives everyone, and apologizes with his whole heart. He did to Ali the same thing Tommy did; stand up for his spouse. It made him see Tommy in a different light, and let go of the anger. That’s all he needed from her; to own her part. They can take baby steps; time and action. In Reza’s interview, he says, Adam wants nothing to do with MJ. Now he feels that he has the insurmountable task of respecting his husband’s wishes, and getting back to a beautiful place with his best friend of thirty years who’s gone. Reza asks if MJ doesn’t think this is amazing. MJ says their realization that they both lacked empathy is a breakthrough. Reza says, a big breakthrough.

Next time, fire eaters and sea life, surfing lessons, GG flirts with Nema; and Mike says, there’s lots of sh*t talking and he wants them to act right.

🍸 On Watch What Happens Live tonight, the word of the night was Reza. They said it a total of 33 times. Andy said if we were playing, don’t drive, but I say, if you were playing, you’re probably dead.

🙌🏾 Some Happy News…

Sheree’s mom has been found.

https://www.essence.com/celebrity/sheree-whitfield-mother-found/

👠 A New Wife In the Hills…

I really liked Garcelle. She might end up being a saving grace of the show, although it’s only the first week.

https://www.essence.com/entertainment/garcelle-beauvais-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills/

Photo gallery.

https://www.essence.com/entertainment/garcelle-beauvais-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills-2/

Dishing the dirt.

https://extratv.com/2020/04/15/garcelle-beauvais-on-what-will-be-difficult-and-awkward-to-watch-on-rhobh/

👨🏻‍⚕️ Botched Quarantine…

If anyone can entertain themselves, these two can.

https://pagesix.com/2020/04/13/how-the-botched-doctors-are-keeping-themselves-busy-in-quarantine/

👰🏼 Marriage Postponement…

She’s not getting married unless it can be televised.

https://pagesix.com/2020/04/05/vicki-gunvalson-postponing-wedding-amid-coronavirus-concerns/

🍼 New Nassif On the Way…

Take two for Paul.

https://extratv.com/2020/04/15/paul-nassifs-much-younger-wife-brittany-pregnant-with-their-first-child/

💋 Kyle Pours the Tea…

https://www.eonline.com/shows/daily_pop/news/1141137/kyle-richards-teases-a-bomb-being-dropped-in-rhobh-season-10-other-show-secrets

I find it doubtful she and LVP will ever be friends again.

https://www.eonline.com/news/1140530/kyle-richards-talks-rhobh-without-lisa-vanderpump-the-possibility-of-a-future-friendship

🛣 Memories…

Before their faces consisted only of fillers and Botox.

https://www.eonline.com/photos/30736/real-housewives-of-beverly-hills-through-the-years?source=email&medium=emn-content-4&cmpid=evening&content=emn-gallery

💰 In Defense of Profit…

Because they need money after building that humongous house.

https://pagesix.com/2020/04/15/heather-dubrow-defends-marked-up-hand-sanitizer/

🥣 She Don’t Wanna Start a Fight…

Pink gives back.

https://pagesix.com/2020/04/15/pink-donates-soups-to-those-in-need-during-coronavirus-pandemic/

🎭 On Broadway…

A quarantinable reminder from the Great White Way.

https://gothamist.com/arts-entertainment/video-broadway-stars-remind-you-stay-home-delightful-coronavirus-show-tune

📣 Quotes of the Week

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to be well-known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. – Fred Allen

Without music, life would be a mistake. – Friedrich Nietzsche

I paint objects as I think them, not as I see them. – Pablo Picasso

People are telling me I’m viral, but I say, don’t worry, I’m fine. – Leslie Jordan, new internet sensation

Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts. – Daniel Patrick Moynihan

Helping my son with his math homework makes me wish homework and numbers and children didn’t exist. – Mike (@dadandburied), on Twitter

Not everyone you lose is a loss. – Dr. Phil

The struggles we endure today will be the ‘good old days’ we laugh about tomorrow. – Aaron Lauritsen (Ain’t it the truth!)

🪁 It’s Still Just the Weekend To Me…

No Dead on Sunday yet, so see you when it’s Sailing time. Stay safe, and get out of those PJs.

Apr17

April 16, 2020 – Snake Not On a Plane, Sonja Was Not a Trophy Wife, John’s Choice, Chefs Go To Market, Camp Coming & Closer

Posted on by
Standard

What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

I swear, I could get up at 5 am, and still be running late around 3 pm. I missed the beginning, but from what I could hear, it sounded like they were just reviewing the end of yesterday’s episode.

At the hospital, Michael tells Sasha it would be nice to paint Nelle as a demon, and have her banished to a parallel dimension. Sasha says she can picture Diane making that argument, and Michael says, Diane is so good, she’d probably make it halfway through the argument before the judge would realize, and hold her in contempt. Sasha likes the Wizard of Oz approach. Bringing Nelle and Michael up front, and dumping a bucket of water on them, to see who doesn’t melt. Carly comes by, and says, that sounds good. Sasha says she’s getting punchy, and Carly says, long hours at the hospital will do that. Who wouldn’t want to see Nelle turn into a green puddle? Michael gets serious, and says he can’t afford to think like that. If he’s wrong, Wiley pays.

At Violet’s party, Maxie tells Robert, now that Obrecht is going to the Hague, can he drop his vendetta against Peter? He says he doesn’t have a vendetta, but she says, whatever he’s calling it, instead of treating Peter like a suspect, why doesn’t he see what they have in common? He says, those they love? and she says, besides that. He says he can’t think of anything, and she says Obrecht tried to kill them both. Robert is used to bouncing back, but Peter has suffered enough. He says, that’s a matter of opinion, and Maxie says she’s known Robert literally her entire life. He says that’s why he wants what’s best for her, and she says he needs to accept what’s best for her is her own decision; like she needs to accept he’ll never see Peter for the wonderful man he is. We flash back to Robert asking Anna if it ever occurred to her that Peter could be Alex’s son. It’s her big chance to sever all ties to Faison. Anna says she’ll never abandon Peter, and Robert says, Peter is an adult, and every bit as treacherous and sadistic as his father. We move to Peter saying, Robert knows he went to Pentenville to visit Shiloh, and Robert saying, but he doesn’t know why. Why doesn’t Peter shine some light on that? We go to Robert telling Peter that his family doesn’t see the dark side of him, but they will. Peter says it kills Robert that the people he cares about, care about and love Peter. There’s nothing he can do to convince Robert, so let those they care about speak for him. Robert says Peter thinks highly of himself. It was Faison’s undoing, and will be Peter’s too. Next, Robert tells Anna that something is wrong. If she wants to deny what’s in front of her face, that’s one thing, but if she denies what’s in her heart, it might come back to bite her. We shift to Robert asking Anna how long Jason has been suspicious, and telling her that she has a Peter-sized blind spot. It’s going to get her into trouble, and when Peter goes down, Robert doesn’t want Anna going with him. There are things in the works, and they’re going to show her what her would-be son is really like. We flash back to Robert accusing Peter of shopping his deal with Sam and Jason to the AG. Peter asks why it matters, unless Robert is up to something shady. Robert thanks Peter for getting him off this production. Now it’s just Peter and Jason. He knows Jason is a trained killer, and Jason knows the truth. He’s coming to get Peter, and this time Anna’s not going to be able to save his sorry butt. In the present, Robert tells Maxie, she’s right. He’s never going to see what she does. Good party. He leaves, she sighs, and Peter walks in, no doubt from listening in the next room.

In the park, Chase tells Willow, maybe they shouldn’t have gone to the party. She says they couldn’t have missed Violet’s birthday extravaganza, but he says he sees what it did to her. She says, it’s not the party; it’s the day. He should go back. He says, and leave her alone? but she says she can handle a walk by herself; she’s resourceful. He says she’s one of the most resourceful people he knows, but it’s how it weighs on her that Nelle might get custody. She says, it’s one thing if Nelle objects to elective surgery, but what if Wiley gets worse and she still refuses? He says, Michael has excellent lawyers, and she says, but what if it’s not enough? He says she’s been more of a mother to Wiley than Nelle, and she says, but she’s not his mother.

Olivia sees Robert heading for the door, and says, sneaking out? He says, guilty. He needs her to do him a big favor. She says, it depends on what it is, and he says he has some pressing business to take care of, but he doesn’t want to disappoint Violet or Anna. She says he could play the didgeridoo one more time, and see how Anna feels. He says it’s complicated, and he needs a bit of a cover created. If someone asks if they’ve seen him, she can say she saw him in the kitchen or the garden. If she does that, he would be so much in her debt. She likes the sound of that, and says she’s got it.

On the phone, Peter says he needs the distraction now. The sooner the better. Make it happen.

Aiden goes inside, and Charlotte follows, but Ava is behind her with Avery. Ava says she’s been telling Avery about Charlotte’s horse. It’s too soon for Avery to have lessons, but Avery loves horses. Avery says she and her grandfather had a sleepover with them in the stables. Ava says maybe Avery could watch Charlotte ride, or maybe have a horse of her own. Charlotte tells Avery, the back stall at Windymere is the best. Butterscotch used to have it, but Charlotte doesn’t live there anymore. Avery asks if Charlotte used to live in the big house, and Ava says, Charlotte did, but she and Nikolas live in the house now. She takes Avery back to the party.

Aiden reaches for the piñata, but Charlotte says, don’t touch it! He says he’s not going to hurt it, and she says she’s sorry she yelled. There’s a big surprise in there, and everybody needs to be here to see it.

Jason tells Sonny, he gave Anna a heads up for him, and she said thank you. She hasn’t seen anything out of order, but she’ll keep her eyes open. Then, a half hour later, Cyrus called, asking to meet with Sonny, and for Jason to relay the message. Sonny says, one thing about Cyrus, he’s doing it the right way.

Maxie tells Peter, he missed Georgie getting her fortune told. It was quite an event, but she has it on video. He says he has Invader business to tend to, and she asks if he has to duck out. He promises it’s important, and says he already told Anna goodbye. She says she’ll stay and sit back, watching the kids fight for candy like a teeny Hunger Games, where no one has to die. He says he’ll see her later. We flash back to Maxie in the cemetery, thanking Peter for saving her and the baby, and saying, Nathan would thank him too. We move to her saying that she’s lucky to have Peter in her life, accepting the fund for Nathan, and telling him that the rest of the family will come around. Peter feels the baby kick, and Maxie says she keeps wondering who he’ll be like; her or Nathan. Peter guesses, a little of both, and she says she can’t wait to meet him. Peter says, that makes two of them. Next, Peter asks Maxie to accompany him to the Nurses Ball, Maxie goes into labor on the way, and Peter delivers the baby by the side of the road. We flash back to Maxie telling Peter that she had to atone for mistakes she made too. He says she’s come a long way; maybe there’s hope for him too. We go through their relationship so far; Peter saying she’s his only true friend, and he’ll forever be sorry for hurting her; Maxie saying that being stuck in the elevator with him, personalized her being done with bitterness, and considering she’s been forgiven, it’s her only way to pay it forward; Peter telling Maxie that he cares more about her than anyone he’s ever cared for, and Maxie saying he’s the first person who’s made her feel this way since Nathan; Peter taking Maxie to Paris on a private jet, but them getting stuck in Toronto instead. We see their first kiss, deciding to move in together, and their first Christmas when Maxie gave Peter a personalized stocking, telling him that he’s officially family and she loves him. He tells her that he never had one, and it’s funny how the smallest things get you. We end with Maxie telling Peter, nobody can come between them, except them.

Robert sneaks into Peter and Maxie’s place. We flash back to Anna telling him that he’s targeting Peter, and asking, why can’t he accept the official story? Why can’t he leave it alone? He says he can’t, and she says, there’s no immediate danger or imminent threat. He’s looked the other way before. There’s no reason for him to be digging, except for his almighty ego, and need to be right. He says he’s not going to watch her wreck herself for a murdering SOB. In the apartment, he says, okay, Henrik. Let’s see what you’re hiding.

Franco asks Aiden, what’s up? and tells him to grab the piñata. Aiden tells him, Charlotte said to leave it alone, and Franco suggests they look at it. Ava tells Elizabeth, if someone had said years ago, that Franco would find happiness showing a child a non-violent piñata, she wouldn’t have believed it. Elizabeth says, he’s changed, and Ava says he’s truly, genuinely happy, and it’s all because of Elizabeth. Elizabeth says, they’re pretty happy together, and Ava wishes she could say the same about her and Nikolas. In the beginning, she thought they were a good match; two outsiders, comforting each other. Now she’s not so sure. Elizabeth says they’re completely different people. Ava is an extrovert, and Nikolas has spent his life under the mercy of other people’s opinions. If he did something bad, it wasn’t bad enough, but if he did something good, it wasn’t good enough. He’s given up on his better angel from time to time. Ava says, no wonder he’s lonely. He puts up a great front, but when he’s home alone, he walks through the house, practically haunting it. He had such high hopes for his return, and he got what he wanted, but no one was happy for him. Elizabeth says, he did some reprehensible things. He should have thought twice about it, if he didn’t want to be held accountable. Ava thinks Nikolas thinks so too. It’s taking its toll. There’s an emptiness she can’t reach.

Chase tells Willow, it’s okay, but she says, it’s not. Wiley’s not a person to Nelle. He’s a means to an end; a weapon to use against Michael and his family. He knows Nelle better than anyone. Does he think if the worst happens, and Nelle gets Wiley, she can look past her selfish needs, and think about Wiley’s best interests? She sure as hell doesn’t. We flash back to Nelle in Charlie’s, saying she wants to change Wiley’s name to William; he’ll adjust. Willow tells her, Wiley is a person, and Nelle says she’s sick of Willow and her self-righteousness. She’ll raise Wiley how she pleases, and Willow needs to remember that her son is dead, and stay the hell away from Nelle’s. Willow throws a drink on Nelle. In the park, she tells Chase, sorry she keeps going on about it. Between her and Michael, it’s probably all he hears. He says, there’s a simple solution. It’s not easy, but the way to improve Michael’s chances in fighting Nelle is for Willow to marry him.

Michael tells Carly and Sasha, he keeps going back to Diane’s strategy. It won’t do any good to make Nelle look bad; he has to look good. Carly says, it’s not an acrimonious divorce. It’s not he said she said. Nelle’s crimes are a matter of public record. He says, if he piles it on Nele, it might make the judge more sympathetic. If he calls her out for the horrible, deranged things she’s done, it could backfire, and she could be seen as a victim. We flash back to Nelle being in the hospital, and Michael saying he’s not going anywhere. We move to Nelle saying she admires Carly as a mother. She made a mistake, but at least understand that she wanted to name the baby Morgan to honor him. Let her make things right. We see Nelle telling Michael, their son didn’t make it, and saying the crash killed him. It’s Michael’s fault. He was too busy trying to get her to confess. He says, she’s blaming him? Jonah is dead because of her. She says he was the one driving. If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s his. He hated her so much, he killed their baby. He’s ruined everything. We flash back to Nelle in jail, telling Carly, if only she’d known Jonah was alive. Brad ripped him from the safety of her arms. Carly says Nelle will never see Wiley again, and if the legal system doesn’t do it, she will. At the hospital, Carly tells Michael, Nelle is a master victim, and Michael says he has to show the court the reason he’s the best parent for Wiley.

Willow says, Chase told Sasha it was insane, but he says he’s had time to think. He sees Willow agonizing over Wiley, but it’s not his decision to make; it’s hers. If she wants to help, she’s got to marry Michael. If her decision is not to marry him, she’s got to take a step back, and let it be Michael’s problem, not hers. We flash back to Michael telling Willow, Nelle is great at faking it, but she’s the real thing. It’s like saccharine versus sugar. One tastes fine, until you have the real thing. She’s the real thing, and the judge would see her love for Wiley.

Sonny says Cyrus knows better than to contact him, so he’s using Jason as a go-between. Jason asks, why risk it? and Sonny asks if he thinks it’s a risk. Jason says Cyrus ambushed Sonny once, he could do it again. Sonny says, maybe Cyrus wants peace, and Jason says, on his terms. Sonny says, if they were his terms, Cyrus would be gone, and Cyrus knows this. Jason says, Cyrus just got out of prison. The last thing he wants is to be charged with another crime. Sonny could call his bluff by making a concession. Sonny says, that’s not going to happen. He needs to know Cyrus’s next move.

The kids gather around the piñata, and Finn says it’s the moment they’ve been waiting for. Is everybody ready? Anna asks if Violet wants to be first, but Violet says, let somebody else go. Anna spins Violet around, and she points to Charlotte. Charlotte suggests Avery have her turn, but Olivia says if they start messing with the rules, somebody’s feelings will get hurt. Charlotte approaches the piñata, takes a ribbon, and pulls.

Jason tells Sonny, Cyrus is fresh out of prison, far from his base of operations, and lost an expensive shipment. Sonny says, his partners are unhappy, and Jason says, Cyrus can’t come after Sonny unless he knows it will work. It’s Sonny’s city, and he has all the advantages. Sonny says, not all. Cyrus has the Police Commissioner under his thumb. Jason says, Jordan could give Cyrus room to maneuver, and clamp down on them. If Cyrus is free to operate, over time, it could hurt them. Sonny says, that’s the key – over time.

Aiden pulls a piñata ribbon, but nothing happens. Franco tells him, it’s okay. He’s in a perfect position to dive for candy. Violet is spun around, and points to another child. Charlotte looks nervous, but the other kids keep taking a turn, and nothing happens. Danny pulls a ribbon, but still nothing, and now Charlotte is like, come on. Avery is up, but the piñata still doesn’t open. It’s Violet’s turn, and Anna asks where Robert is. He’ll want to see this. Olivia says she thinks he’s on the patio.

Robert looks around, and opens drawers. The front doorknob turns.

The kids chant Violet’s name. She pulls a ribbon, and candy rains down. The kids drop to the floor, scrambling for it. Ava says, it’s precious, and digs in her bag, presumably for her camera. She drops the bag, and Nagini slithers out. Everyone screams, and Charlotte smiles.

On Monday, Robert confronts Spinelli about looking for dirt on Peter (we assume it’s Spinelli whose jiggling the doorknob), Laura tells Lulu that Valentin wants the same thing they all do, and Valentin tells Nikolas to stay away from his daughter.

Tomorrow, the episode from January 17, 2018 is listed in the guide. I can’t decipher exactly which one it is, since the blurb is vague, but it’s around the time of Jim Harvey and Nathan being revealed as Obrecht and Faison’s son.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Ramona has made plans for the women to visit a vineyard. In her interview, she says she wants to make sure they’re not bored and fighting, so they’re going to a winery. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, surprise, surprise. LuAnn woke up complaining about her room. We see a clip where – horrors! – the Countess saw a spider, and tells everyone she’s going to the chiropractor. The women take a limo, and go to the vineyard restaurant for lunch. Leah orders merlot. In her interview, she says she’s not an alcoholic, but didn’t like what alcohol was doing to her life. She stopped drinking, but now drinks when she wants, and she’s been drinking a bit over the last six months. Ramona gets a text from LuAnn saying she can’t make it. She got her neck cracked, and the doctor told her to take it easy. She’ll see them later. In Leah’s interview, she asks, in what world would you invite someone battling sobriety to a winery, and act surprised when they don’t want to go? It’s not a big riddle. Dorinda says after only 24 hours, they got Leah to drink. Ramona says, the weekend isn’t over yet. I didn’t see them pour Leah’s wine, but WTF? It’s like maybe two sips. Either she guzzled something when I wasn’t looking, or they are cheap with a pour. At a winery. In Ramona’s interview, she says bonding means opening up with what they’re feeling inside, and we flash back to her and Bethenny discussing their fathers. She says, that’s how they get close and get to know one another, rather than talking about superficial stuff.

Ramona tells the women, she came from a disruptive household. Growing up, she would play music, and look out the window at the clouds, wondering what was out there for her. Years later, driving back from the Hamptons, she felt like she was sixteen again, questioning what was going on with her life. Dorinda says she has goosebumps, and Ramona tells them, she said, mommy, help me. Sonja is impressed with the self-realization, and says she’d thought Ramona was avoiding the topic. In Ramona’s interview, she says it’s important in life to feel safe with a person, and it scares her that she doesn’t have that in her life. Tinsley says she has the same feeling, and she doesn’t even have a child. At least all of them have had those things, and checked them off. Ramona says, it’s not a box you check, and Dorinda says she enjoys Tinsley, but she has frustration with her. It’s like how they were talking about icebergs on the Discovery channel. As big and beautiful as they are on the surface, 90% of them are under water. She feels like she’s only seeing the tip of Tinsley. It’s not about being nosey, but getting to know her. Sonja says she didn’t even know Tinsley had a new boyfriend.

Tinsley says, Bruce is from Chicago, and has three children and two ex-wives. She’s never really been around children, and was surprised she could deal with that, and be a part of the family. She doesn’t know if it’s going to be long term; she’s not used to being one of an army of people, and wonders, where does she fit in? Leah thinks Brett is being selfish. We see a clip of Leah asking Tinsley if she feels like she’s wasting her time, and Tinsley says she always feels that way. She tells the women, she probably won’t have her own kid with this guy. Every time she sees him, it’s with his family, and she needs alone time with him. Leah says, they’re also socializing with his friends. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she doesn’t like being sixth on the totem pole.

It’s Leah’s turn, and she tells everyone, after high school, her parents sent her to rehab. When they came to get her, they told her she wasn’t coming home. In her interview, she says she was an effed up teenager, and put her parents through hell. They told her that they couldn’t have her disrupting her brother’s and sister’s lives. She tells the women, her parents told her that they couldn’t have her there, and took her to a halfway house run by nuns. They drove her to a nunnery in Upstate New York, and drove off. She wondered what was happening to her life, but later realized that her mother was trying to save her life. She had to face the consequences of the things she was doing, but it gave her perseverance. She’s been though the worst. In Ramona’s interview, she says Leah had the vulnerably to confide in them, and she has empathy, since she went through a bit of that herself

Dorinda gets weepy, and says she needs another napkin. She’s been crying for a month, and doesn’t know what’s wrong with her. She says she’s scared every day, and starts to cry. Leah asks what she’s scared of, and Ramona comes around the table and hugs her. Dorinda says everyone thinks she’s strong and able. She’s the anchor for everyone’s boat, but sometimes she wants to be the boat, and be anchored by someone else. Ramona says Dorinda is overwhelmed, and Dorinda says she’s always running the show. Ramona says Dorinda does for everybody, and in Dorinda’s interview, she says, life is heavy. She wakes up worried, and goes to bed worried, and has no one to share the burden with. John never had these kinds of responsibilities. She’s tapped out. Leah says the pressure is always on women to do everything.

Ramona says Sonja is next. Sonja says she’s at the point Ramona was, wondering how she got there. She runs around, pays the bills, and has one foot in the nursing home. She didn’t sign up for this. Then you die. Dorinda says, she thought they were supposed to be expressing their hearts, and Leah wonders where the oxygen tank is. In her interview, Dorinda says, Sonja has had a couple of drinks, and she’s talking about everything except what makes her vulnerable. Stop her. Ramona looks at her phone, and says she’s checking on where she’s having her party. In her interview, she says she’s having a fabulous cocktail party at Joe Ferrell’s home. It’s stunning, and the women’s mouths are going to drop.

Back at the house, Tinsley tells Leah, she went on a date with Joe, and it was the lamest date ever. It was a basketball game. Leah says, and he didn’t even feed her or anything. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she found out he’d also dated Bethenny. He wasn’t her type, and she doesn’t think he drinks either.

LuAnn gets back, and in her interview, she says she didn’t want to miss any bonding, but she’s glad she took care of her neck. She didn’t sleep well, and between the spiders and the smell, she’s not comfortable. Dorinda asks how Ramona’s afternoon was, and Ramona admits she had had date. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s never seen a person slip in and out of dates so quickly. It’s like sliding doors. We flash back to Ramona leaving various events for a date, and Dorinda says, it’s impressive. Ramona says he was Persian, sexy, and more flirtatious than she is.

Ramona tells LuAnn to come to her bathroom to do makeup. LuAnn goes upstairs, and in her interview, Ramona says LuAnn’s floral dress does not belong in the Hamptons. It belongs in Nantucket or Atlanta. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she’s glad she missed lunch. By the looks of it, Sonja was over-served, and they’re not even at the party yet.

On the way to the party, in one limo, Ramona tells Dorinda that Joe is a major developer. In the other limo, LuAnn tells Sonja that she’s interested to see the house. Sonja says, Ramona is a social butterfly, who needs to be knocked down a notch. It’s not a good look. Sonja says she’s trying to hang onto her long term friends, but Ramona is more interested in the rent-a-crowd, party filler people. In Sonja’s interview, she says, Ramona is showing off her fancy friends, but it’s just another boring party, with stiff people, and a lot of small talk. She thinks Ramona forgot what’s important in life.

The house, named Sandcastle, is massive, and there’s a humongous mirror in the entryway. Ramona says she’s in love with it, which is no surprise. LuAnn says the house is for sale, and Sonja says no wonder they were invited. She realizes that the four of them sharing the limo – her, LuAnn, Tinsley, and Leah – all have mug shots. Leah’s says, it’s a bunch of weird white people, and in her interview, she says, it’s not the type of party she’s used to. It’s weird Eyes Wide Shut sh*t. By the end, she’s going to be taken to a back room and made to be someone’s bitch. (I just have to interject that I had a hard time keeping my eyes wide open when I saw Eyes Wide Shut. It wasn’t nearly as interesting as I thought it would be, and that one-note piano score was sleep inducing.) Sonja is disappointed that there’s no gin, and goes for Tito’s. Ramona introduces everyone, and Sonja says she’s being so formal. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, Sonja lived like Ramona is pretending to. Sonja tells Ramona, they might be in a $39 million home, but act like she’s in her $7 million home; she likes to be down-to-earth. In Ramona’s interview, she says, with Sonja, she has to bring herself down, while with her other friends, she has to elevate herself.

Ramona accuses Leah of chewing gum, like it’s a crime, and Leah says, no, she’s not. She walks outside with Tinsley, and says she swallowed it. Ramona’s eyes scared the hell out of her. She saw Ramona’s eyes, and just swallowed the gum. Ramona just scolded her, but she’s not from the royal family. Inside, Sonja says she thinks Leah is classy, but doesn’t look classy; she’s rough around the edges. Ramona thanks Joe for letting her use the house. In her interview, Tinsley says, it’s weird seeing Joe. She thinks he and Ramona would make a good couple. The way Ramona is batting her lashes, he seems to be into it. She tells Leah, Ramona is flirting as usual. In her interview, Leah says, Joe seems like a nice older gentlemen. Men who are short and unattractive still have women running after them if they have money. It’s the world we live in. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, it’s hard not to drink. The bar is there, and everyone is drinking. She was hoping Leah would be her wingman by not drinking, but it’s not happening. She’s lost her sober companion.

Ramona gathers everyone for a house tour, and they check out the bowling alley in the basement. The women are impressed, and Joe says his house just made him hotter. In her interview, Leah says, exhibit A. She rests her case. Tinsley is having a hard time bowling in heels, and gets a gutter ball. On the way downstairs, Dorinda tells LuAnn that she thinks touring houses is tacky. In her interview, Dorinda says she lived with her husband in London, and they don’t do house tours. You see the living room and the dining room, and maybe the kitchen. Maybe. LuAnn and Dorinda do some bowling, and LuAnn gets a strike. In another room, Joe shows them a half pipe he had put in for his son, and a DJ booth. There’s also a swing that can be hoisted to the ceiling, and when Ramona goes up in it, it makes me nervous. It’s not like there’s a seat belt.

Mutual friend Elyse joins them, and Dorinda says she was married to a hedge fund guy. They discuss clothes, and Elyse says she’s not a huge shopper. Investments, yes; clothes, no. Sonja says her husband always bought her clothes, and Elyse says Sonja was his accessory. Sonja takes offense, insisting they were partners. Elyse says Sonja was a trophy wife, and Sonja starts to get loud, telling Elyse to clip it. Elyse says, Sonja brought men to their knees, and Sonja keeps repeating, take it back, until Elyse takes it back. Sonja says, Tinsley was a trophy wife, which annoys Tinsley. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she and Topper met at boarding school, and they were the same age. Sonja was a hostess when she met her husband, who was a hundred. That’s the definition of a trophy wife. Sonja announces that she doesn’t shave her p*ssy. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, Sonja is drunk, but she doesn’t think Elyse should be talking like that. It’s no one’s business to pass judgement on what roll any of them played in their husbands’ lives. LuAnn tells Dorinda, Sonja is off the rails, and shouldn’t have kept drinking. She’s going to be out like a light. Dorinda says, or it will be batten down the hatches.

The women check out the buffet, and LuAnn wants someone to tell her why she left her own beautiful house to spend the weekend in Ramona’s basement. It smells like dog piss. In LuAnn’s interview, she says, the room is also fully stocked with liquor. She noticed. Sonja tells Ramona to go sit with her rich friends. She’s treating them like chicken liver. Everyone is like, um… that’s chopped liver. In Ramona’s interview, she says, when Sonja acts like this, it’s no wonder she’s not invited to certain events. Sonja says they’re not important to Ramona, and Dorinda says, Sonja is on a roll. Leah sits down, and Sonja points to a young guy sitting at the table, saying he wants to have sex with her. Leah says, who wouldn’t want to have sex with her? In Leah’s interview, she says, watching Sonja eye-f*** this dude is the best part of the whole party. She wonders if Sonja would say, never mind, if he had a tattoo. She doesn’t think so. The guy asks if Sonja wants a drink, and Ramona suggests he get Sonja some club soda. Sonja tells him, just show her his driver’s license, and they’re good to go. She has an amazing vagina. LuAnn joins them, wondering what’s happening, and Sonja asks how her p*ssy is. LuAnn looks down, and says, it’s all still there. Sonja says she stole the show, but they’re not getting laid tonight. It’s all quite astonishing. And astonishing that Sonja is invited anywhere.

In her interview, Leah says, Sonja is not just entertaining, she’s embarrassing. They get up from the table, and Sonja says Ramona is a party popper [sic]. Ramona says, the party is over, and Sonja says, Ramona is over. She tries to latch on to a guy going past, and LuAnn says he’s married and has a baby. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s like Godzilla has been let loose, and Godzilla is drunk. Ramona steers them all out, and a guy named Eddie asks if every night is like this.

Sonja tries to go back, but Dorinda says, no, you’re not. Sonja says Dorinda is getting in between her and her vagina. Dorinda wonders why Sonja does this to herself – and them.

I’ve been wondering why I like this show when it’s just as drama laden as RHOBH. The lightbulb came on just now. The women are just as self-centered, and sometimes as mean, as the women in Beverly Hills. But when they’re mean, it’s because they want attention or they’re thoughtless – not because they’re deliberately being cruel or want to get back at each other. Huge difference. Same drama, but different intention. It’s kind of like the difference between 2 Broke Girls and King of Queens. The people are both awful, but on 2 Broke Girls, you know when push came to shove, they’d do anything for one another or even to help a stranger. On King of Queens, they’d trample each other to get to a fire exit. But they’re not real, so it can be funny. Okay, digression – and commercial break – over.

It’s 10 am, when Dorinda knocks on Ramona’s door. She says, there’s a problem. LuAnn left, and she’s written an out-of-control text. Ramona says she saw a car pull out last night, and thought someone stole her car. Dorinda doesn’t know why she was cc’d, and reads the text addressed to Ramona. LuAnn says, it’s not the fish room part two. She has an amazing home, and there, she had to share a bathroom with someone she didn’t know or be in the basement, where there’s dog piss and spiders. She’s always lowest on the totem pole when it comes to rooms. Ramona says she asked LuAnn if she wanted a room on the  ground floor, and thinks LuAnn just wanted to go home. Dorinda wonders why LuAnn can’t just say she doesn’t want be downstairs, and that it feels lonely. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, LuAnn always has an issue with the room. We flash back to Vermont, when LuAnn whined that she was just married and back from Palm Springs, so her room could have been nicer; and Great Barrington, where LuAnn griped that the best room was being saved for Bethenny, who’d just been through a tragedy. Dorinda says, and Ramona’s house. Dorinda thinks there’s a theme going on here.

Ramona calls LuAnn, and gets voicemail. Dorinda tells her to be careful with what she says. Ramona says she hopes LuAnn got home safe. She’s sorry LuAnn felt isolated, and that she wasn’t being more aware of how LuAnn felt. She was concentrating on superficial things, when it was important to bond, and she never meant to make LuAnn feel that way. She asks LuAnn to come back, and she’ll try to make it up to her. I’m kind of surprised, since Ramona actually sounds sincere. She tells Dorinda that LuAnn felt rejected, and she gets that. In her interview, Ramona says she doesn’t want LuAnn to feel bad. She was preparing for eight women, cooking, cleaning, and shopping, and effed up.

Sonja wonders what happened last night, and thinks she had a great time. Ramona asks if she’s straight yet, and tells her about LuAnn leaving at 1 am. In Sonja’s interview, she says LuAnn was humbled by her probation for ten seconds. Now everything’s not good enough. Sonja reads the text, and they all want to see the basement, and troop downstairs. Sonja deems it a party palace. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it was either sleeping in the guest room, or being home. A bed, television, and bathroom is enough.

Ramona’s phone rings. It’s LuAnn.

Next time, Ramona and LuAnn have a tennis match; a cute dog groomer comes to groom Marley, and LuAnn says she’d like to be groomed; a game of beer pong is played; Leah goes off the deep end; and Ramona wails over the remnants of a very messy party.

📡 John Olivier and LuAnn were guests on Watch What Happens Live (quarantine edition), and John was too funny. He was enthralled with next week’s RHONY preview, and how it went from, I think there’s vodka in that, to I think she’ll be okay, to a naked Leah pulling a tiki torch out of the ground, to a guy nobody knows saying, I think I should go. He said, if someone would ask which he liked better, that or Parasite, he would say Parasite, but he’d be lying.

👨🏾‍🍳 On Top Chef, the chefs arrived to find stations for each of them, with utensils, aprons, and tablets. They each got a phone call from a loved one; wives, moms, sisters, and friends, and chatted for a while. Padma came in and told them to gather around. Their loved ones were going to be an integral part of the Quickfire challenge. They were all at Mozza, an upscale restaurant, and the chefs would have to replicate whatever dish their person was eating, using their instructions given over the phone. The dish had to look and taste the same, but a photo couldn’t be texted. They had thirty minutes to cook the dish, which I probably don’t have to point out, isn’t very long. As usual, the winner would be exempt from elimination, but they would also receive $10K courtesy of the show’s partner, Metro. Kevin said the run for ingredients reminded him of the streets of Manhattan; everyone was running around like lunatics, wearing headphones, and screaming at someone no one else could see. Since each loved one had a different set of communication skills, it was pretty funny to watch the chefs try to decipher what it was they were going to make. After cooking/plating time was up, a photo of the dish was texted to them, so they could see how close they came. Guest judge Nancy Silverton, owner of the Mazzo restaurant group, and whose dishes were being reproduced, was introduced. Bryan had a totally different dish, so it was the least favorite, but Nancy made a point of saying it was still delicious. Kevin was the winner (aw! I like him), and he called his wife, saying that her being super detail oriented panned out. In his interview, he said his successes had always been because of her, and he was glad they got the opportunity to enjoy the victory together.

Nancy explained that, in addition to her restaurants, she was also an entrepreneur. She had the Bakery Bread company, and was starting a gelato line called Nancy’s Fancy. The chefs were to create a signature product to bring to the Westfield Century City Food Festival. They would be giving out samples of food using their creation, and the shoppers would each get one ticket to receive one product. The chefs’ loved ones would assist them in the making of the product, and they were given $600 to shop at Whole Foods. While making dumplings, the kitchen got a little too hot for Lee Anne’s mom, who came close to fainting, and had to lie down. In Lee Anne’s interview, she said her mom was her main consideration, but she still had to be in the competition – alone – and finish a million dumplings. Okay, it was really 150. Several of the others came to rescue, and she said she was touched that she had great people willing help. I was pretty impressed with that myself. Afterwards, Bryan ranked the others in a notebook, no surprise, putting himself at the top. He’s starting to get on my nerves.

At the food festival, the chefs labeled their products. Melissa ended up being the top seller, receiving tickets for 31 bottles of kimchee vinaigrette. She said she’d wanted to create a versatile product, which seemed to be key. Nancy picked Gregory as the winner of the challenge with some Haitian pickled veggies that I wouldn’t mind a jar of. The bottom three were Stephanie, Jennifer, and Bryan full of Malarkey. In his interview, he whined that his product sold well, and tasted amazing, because he knows better than the judges. Stephanie was told her marinara sauce was nothing different than was already out there. Bryan’s salsa whatever was oily, and Tom said it was confusing as to what he was actually selling. Stephanie’s ginger lemon sauce, which sounded like a good idea, was deemed not smooth enough by Tom, and Nancy thought Stephanie had diluted the flavor by mixing in yogurt. Tom did say he was impressed with how quickly the chefs all came up decent product on the first try, saying it had taken twelve times for him to get his first product correct. He also conceded that in a crowded market, it was hard to get something to stand out.

While I was hoping Bryan would be packing his knives and going, it was Jennifer who was moving on to Last Chance Kitchen. She says she was from Philly, and Rocky kept coming back. In her interview, she told us, the competition had done so much good for her; she’d learned a lot about herself. She started off wanting things done her way, and it motivated her to be better. She now accepted that she makes mistakes, and wanted to learn. Her best memory was going to be cooking with her sister. The loss couldn’t change how happy the challenge made her.

Next time, the elimination challenge will be a celebration of the 100th Anniversary of the L.A. Philharmonic, the chefs will pair up, and it will be a double elimination. In the preview, Lee Anne said shopping with Bryan was like shopping with monkeys on crack.

🏕 Coming May 4th…

I’m hoping this isn’t like Summer House at camp, but it looks like it probably is.

https://www.bravotv.com/camp-getaway

👯‍♂️ But Not Too Close…

We’re getting there, and I hope in the meantime, you’re getting up and getting dressed. No slippers before 6 pm, and make that bed. Unless you don’t normally make your bed, then disregard that. Stay safe, and wear that mask with pride.

Apr16

April 15, 2020 – Sonny Calls Nikolas a Coward, Beverly Hills Goes To Fashion Week & Surviving

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

I missed the beginning, so here are the highlights. Sonny tells Jason, someone else needs to be warned about Cyrus, and Jason jets. Nikolas and Ava stop by Sonny’s place, via the kitchen entrance, and Charlotte has brought a sack containing her pet snake, Nagini, to Violet’s party. She tells him that they’re going to have so much fun, and hides the sack in the alcove under the stairs.

Lulu suggests Charlotte help by giving the kids some pointers. Charlotte looks at the sack, and goes with Lulu.

Sonny says the newlyweds, and Nikolas says, good to see him. Sonny asks why it took Nikolas so long to climb out from under his rock to say hello, and  Ava says they’re here to pick up Avery for Violet’s party; they’re not looking for a fight. Sonny says bodyguard Cy is taking them; he’s the best, and discreet. They won’t even know he’s there. Nikolas says he can protect his wife and her daughter, but Sonny says Nikolas is going to stay. They have a lot of catching up to do.

When they’re alone, Nikolas tells Sonny, he has an apology to make before Sonny says anything. Several apologies. He’s sorry about leaving Spencer, and sorry for getting Carly involved. Asking her to keep him a secret from Sonny was a bad call. Sonny says Nikolas has made a lot of them, but Nikolas says it was the only way to keep Spencer safe. Sonny says, it wasn’t the only way. Nikolas says he did what was best for his family, Sonny says, he didn’t. He doesn’t care about Nikolas, but he does care about Nikolas’s mother and his son, and the choices Nikolas made that affected them. He knows all he needs to know about Nikolas. Nikolas asks, what’s that? and Sonny says, there’s only one kind of man who would betray his children like Nikolas did, and he has no use for him. We flash back to Nikolas telling Spencer that he needed to be strategic, and Spencer saying he needed his father.

Maxie tells Peter, when she spoke to Lulu, she said Valentin wasn’t worth fighting over, and Lulu agreed. Anna approaches them, and says, Georgie is about to ride the pony. She wants them to watch her. Maxie wonders if she should film it in regular or slo-mo. Anna goes inside, and sees Robert with a wrapped gift that looks like a really long stick. She says, absolutely not. Not in her house. Not now; not ever. Robert says, it’s practically a tradition. Violet comes in with Finn, and asks where Robert went. Robert says he went to pick up something special. Finn asks Anna if he should be worried, and Anna tells him that he should be afraid. Violet asks Anna to help unwrap it. Elizabeth tells Finn, it’s a good party, and he says it’s just something he threw together. She says, Violet is having a wonderful birthday, and he says she doesn’t think he went overboard? She says, not at all, and he says it’s the first birthday party he’s throwing for her, and he needs to prove he can deliver. Elizabeth says, and he did, but he doesn’t need prove anything. The one thing Violet already knows is that he’s a good dad. The gift is unwrapped, and it’s a didgeridoo. Robert plays it, and says, it’s a classic happy birthday.

Franco sees Ava and Avery, and Ava asks if Avery remembers her friend Franco. Franco says he remembers her, and asks if she’d like some popcorn. Ava says, popcorn is gross, and Avery doesn’t like it. Avery says she loves popcorn, and Franco suggests she get her own box. He can be her guide through the party; there’s a juggler and petting zoo.

Catching Olivia on her way in from screaming at Rocco, Robert tells her, he’s sorry, but Dante’s condition hasn’t improved. We flash back to Olivia telling Dante, for so long, it was just the two of them. She knew she could never give him everything he deserves. Dante says she did great, and she says she did her best. Every decision she made was to keep him safe, but she realized, as he grew, her job was going to get harder, because he’s not a man who will ever be content to be safe. He’s a hero in every sense of the word. Olivia tells Robert, it’s been over a year; there must be an improvement. He says he’s sorry to bring her bad news, but she says, unlike the doctors at the WSB, she’s not giving up. As long as Dante is alive, there’s still hope.

Dante asks if Sonny talks to Spencer, and Sonny says they’re very close. Spencer wants to know why he’s been abandoned by his father. I stare at the bowl of moss. Sonny says, Spencer checks in every night with a text or voicemail, but when Spencer calls, he picks up and they talk. Nikolas asks, what about? He’s sure Spencer tells Sonny what a terrible father he is. Sonny says he doesn’t mention Nikolas much; he doesn’t have to. It’s in everything he says, and not in a good way. Spencer tells him about school, what he does, his discoveries in France. He doesn’t say he’s lonely; he doesn’t have to. Nikolas is sorry his son is in pain, but Spencer is a child. In time, he’ll understand the choices Nikolas made were to protect him. Sonny says, Nikolas did it for himself, and Spencer doesn’t understand why Nikolas chose to abandon him. We flash back to Spencer telling Nikolas that he could have come home any time; Spencer never had to leave home, but Nikolas cared more about hating Valentin than loving him. Ava tells Spencer, Nikolas always loved him, but Spencer says he hated Valentin for killing Nikolas. Now he hates Nikolas for not staying dead. Nikolas tells Sonny, of all people, he thought Sonny would understand the lengths he went to in order to protect his family. Sonny says, only cowards do what Nikolas did, and he isn’t a coward. Nikolas would be smart to remember that.

Nikolas says, if Sonny is calling him a coward, he’s conveniently forgotten that Valentin tried to kill him. He had to protect Spencer, and find a way to take back what was his. Sonny says, it’s like one snake taking the head off another. Stay away from the people he loves, including his wife. Nikolas says he regrets dragging Carly into it, and Sonny says, and Spencer. We flash back to Ava asking Spencer not to shut Nikolas out. She knows how profoundly Spencer was affected by losing Nikolas, and how deeply Nikolas loves him. It’s time they both stopped hurting, and put anger aside. Let his father love him again. Spencer tells Nikolas, he could have come back with nothing. Instead, he let Spencer believe he was dead. Spencer has lived every day for the past three years alone, because of Nikolas. He built Nikolas up as a noble prince in his memory, but he’s as heartless as Valentin. The Cassadine legacy is more important than he is. Stay the hell away from him.

Willow and Chase come bearing a unicorn piñata, and Willow explains how a piñata works by pulling strings on it. Chase asks, what happened to beating the thing until it breaks? Finn asks if he has no compassion for paper mache, and Willow says, some kids don’t like hitting things that look like something that’s alive. Rocco runs in, and says Peter Pan is there. Willow goes back out with him, and Chase follows. Finn puts the piñata aside.

Finn tells Chase, he’s glad Willow could make it. Chase thinks she’s having a good time; she loves being around kids. Finn says, it makes sense, since she’s a teacher. He asks if Chase is all right, and Chase says, he’s fine, but Willow’s not. The whole custody battle is getting to her. Wiley isn’t her son, but they bonded fully and deeply. She can’t just switch it off. Michael is fighting for full custody, but if he loses, and Nelle gets Wiley, he’s not sure Willow can take it.

Charlotte comes back in, as Anna heads out the front door. Jason is on the porch, and she says she’s sorry she couldn’t meet at the MetroCourt, but she has this party going on. He says he just wanted to give her a heads up, and she says, if it’s about Peter, she can’t. He says, it’s about Cyrus, and she says she saw he was released. He says, Cyrus is trying to get leverage on key members of law enforcement. He doesn’t know if she’s a target, but Sonny wanted her to be aware. She tells him to thank Sonny, and he asks if the WSB has ever gone after Cyrus? She says she can’t share that information, and he says if she feels something is wrong, it can’t hurt to have back up. Sam comes out with Danny, and Danny says, dad?

Willow asks if Chase knows what the nicest thing about the party is, and he says, the bounce house? The petting zoo? She says seeing his grumpy brother doting on Violet. Does he know any other circumstance that would get Dr. Finn on a pony ride? It’s amazing how kids change your life. Chase flashes back to Sasha telling him, the only reason Michael isn’t asking Willow to marry him, is out of respect for Chase and Willow’s relationship. Chase says Willow would never leave him. She’d feel terrible, and it’s not the kind of person she is. But how could she be happy for the rest of her life, if Nelle got custody of Wiley, and she knew she could have stopped it, and didn’t? Chase tells Willow, he could use a walk. How about her? She takes his hand, and they leave.

Anna asks Jason to excuse her; she has to get back. Danny asks if Jason is there for the party, but he says he had to talk to Anna, and he can’t stay.

Ava sees Charlotte, and asks how she is. Charlotte says she’d like to go home. Ava says she’s sure Charlotte’s mother would be happy to take her, but Charlotte says she’s referring to her real home. Ava is sorry it’s difficult, but says, Charlotte knows Windymere belongs to her and Nikolas. Charlotte says, it’s not about her. Butterscotch misses his stall. Ava asks if Butterscotch is her pony, and she says, Butterscotch is a horse; there’s a big difference. A pony is fourteen hands, and Butterscotch is fifteen hands. Ava says she’s more than welcome to visit any time, but she doesn’t think Butterscotch would enjoy the launch. Charlotte doesn’t think so either. Lulu comes in, and tells Ava, she hopes Charlotte wasn’t rude. Ava says, Charlotte is just upset about her horse not being at Windymere. Lulu says, it’s definitely been an adjustment, and Ava tells her, blame Valentin for giving Charlotte false expectations. Lulu starts to respond, and Ava tells says, she knows what Lulu wants to say. They kind of want the same thing. Lulu asks what Ava thinks that is, and Ava says, for them to be better acquainted as sisters-in-law. Lulu says that’s not what she was going to say, and Ava says, come on. At least play along. It gives them something else to do other than bask in the glow of childhood mirth. Lulu says, it’s no secret she hates Valentin, and Ava says, wait until he pushes her from a parapet. Lulu says, the last thing she wants is her daughter caught in the middle of their feud. Ava says, no problem, and Lulu says, so she’ll help steer Charlotte clear of that? Ava says, she really means, no problem. Nikolas versus Valentin is over; they won. Lulu says, okay, great, and thanks her.

Peter sees Lulu, and Lulu says, look at them, talking socially. Peter asks if she’s warning him not to talk shop, and she says there’s nothing she’d love more, but kids, sugar, animals; it’s not the right frame of mind. He suggests they talk about Maxie instead. Her new job at Deception means a lot to her. Lulu says, it means a lot to her too. If working near, and having her paycheck covered by Valentin is a mistake, it’s Maxie’s to make. Peter says his eyes are open, and he’s watching. She tells him, be ready to catch Maxie when Valentin knocks her down.

Nikolas says Spencer is his son, but Sonny says, according to Spencer, he’s an orphan. Nikolas wasn’t there, so Sonny had to be. Nikolas says he’s sorry, but he cleared the road for Spencer to be the man he’ll never be. Sonny says, spare him the false humility. Nikolas is proud he climbed out of the sea, into bed with Ava, and back to Windymere. Congratulations. Nikolas can do what he wants, but if it touches Spencer – Sonny gets closer to him – he will intervene. Understand him? Nikolas says, yeah, and Sonny says, good. Then they’re done. Nikolas leaves.

Jason tells Danny, there’s something important they need to talk about. He wants Danny to keep being a great big brother. Look out for Scout and his mom, because Jason can’t be around for a while. Danny asks, why not?

Charlotte opens the sack, and asks Nagini if he’s okay in there, and promises he’ll be out soon. Ava and Franco come in, and Charlotte skootches into the alcove. Ava says she left it out there, but Franco says they don’t need to do this now. Ava picks up her purse, and says she’ll check her calendar. How’s tomorrow for their next sitting? He wants to get back to the party; he kind of likes the piñata. She laughs, and says, look at them. At a birthday party, at Anna’s house no less. He says, they’ve come a long way, and she says, yet she’s nowhere near satisfied. He says Nikolas has a bottomless bank account, and she’s a princess. She says, her tiara is tarnished, and he says he’s happy for her. It’s her vision of a dream come true. She says, not yet, but it will be. She puts her purse back, and they go back outside. Charlotte peeks out, and looks at the piñata.

Finn goes inside, and sits on the couch. Anna sees him, and says, just when she thought everything was going well. He says he has a kit in his medical bag, but she says, the party is going famously. She wondered what’s troubling him. He asks if he looks troubled, and she says he does. He says he was thinking maybe he should write Violet a letter, but she says, just tell Violet what he wants to tell her. He says he would be writing from a person who should be there, and Anna realizes he means Hayden. He says, on one hand, it would be a way to tell Violet that her mom is thinking of her, but on the other, it may imply Hayden is coming back. Anna says they don’t know what the case is, and asks if Violet has questioned him recently. He says, it’s been a while, and she says, from what she sees, Violet is a wise little person (aw!), sorting through what she thinks might have happened. When she’s ready, she’ll ask. He hopes he knows what to say when she does. We flash back, going down Hayden Memory Lane. Finn sitting with her at the MetroCourt, and telling her that he had a breakthrough in his research; Finn asking her to leave a toothbrush at his place, and kissing her; Griff telling them, the test results say she’s pregnant; Finn telling her that he wants to be family with her and the baby, and proposing; Finn finding out she’s Rachel Berlin, and asking why she didn’t tell him that she was in trouble. He loves her, and she got him through addiction. Why didn’t she let him help her through this? We move to Elizabeth telling Finn that Hayden is gone; Hayden writing the letter, telling Finn that the baby didn’t survive; Finn seeing her again, when she returned to Port Charles; Curtis asking if Finn thinks the child is alive; Hayden bringing Violet to the hospital, and telling Finn that she’s his daughter; Finn confronting Hayden, and saying he wants to be a part of Violet’s life; Finn telling Hayden that he’s her daddy, and explaining that he and her mommy were so in love, they made a baby; Finn introducing Violet to Anna, and thanking her for accepting Violet. We see Finn reading Hayden’s letter, telling him that she’s leaving Violet with him, and not to come after her, but to make sure Violet knows her mother loves her. We move to Finn and Violet pulling on the Thanksgiving wishbone, and Finn telling Violet that she’s his wish.

Anna tells Finn, of course (🍷) he’ll know. It’s a beautiful party. Just enjoy it, and let everything else go for now. Charlotte comes out with the piñata, and Finn asks where she’s going with it. She says she’s keeping it safe, and asks if it’s time yet. He says, almost, and Anna says she’ll gather the children. He takes the piñata from Charlotte, and she says, be careful. He doesn’t want any candy to fall out.

Um… wouldn’t it feel different? Like a different weight, and moving around?

Tomorrow, Chase says it’s Willow’s decision, Maxie asks Robert if Peter hasn’t suffered enough, and Charlotte tells Danny, there’s going to be a good surprise.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

I wasn’t going to even watch this season, after these horrible women drove my beloved Lisa from the show (and Giggy with her), but my curiosity over Denise’s friendship with Brandi coming back to bite her in the ass – both figuratively and possibly literally – was piqued. So I decided to do a minicap on this one.

I was eating dinner as I watched this, and even before the opening credits I wanted to stab a couple of them with my fork. I could feel my hand tightening around it. I have to say though, new girl – actress, mom of twin eleven-year-old boys, and friend of Denise – Garcelle Beauvais might just give them a run for their money. I have the feeling she’s not going to take their bullsh*t. After moving to NYC from Haiti at age seven, she said she could handle anything, even those damn Housewives. Useless trivia: she learned to speak English from watching Sesame Street.

The women went to New York Fashion Week (hey, you, get out of my city) for Kyle’s first show as a designer. Needless to say, our jeans and T-shirt girl, Denise, was less than enthusiastic. Speaking of Kyle, at the last reunion, she was lauded as queen, since LVP wisely left, and it showed in her narcissism attitude. After checking into their swank NYC hotel, they took a side trip to New Jersey (get out! get out!), and went to Shakers, a strip club where Erika used to work, although they were really more go-go girls than strippers, and the dancing was a real snooze. Erika wasn’t sure if the group was going to be accepting or judgmental. I guess she’s never seen this show before, because they’re usual response is to pretend to be the former, while being the latter for real. At lunch, we found out that Charlie Sheen was once again being a d-bag, taking Denise to court because he no longer wanted to pay child support. Erika immediately called Tom, who volunteered to go with her, but Denise didn’t want to deal with it. In her interview, she said she knew Charlie best, and would deal with her own family in her own way.

Kyle met with friend Domenico Dolce (from the Dolce side of Dolce & Gabbana), who has more money than God, and LisaR met with friend Sutton Stracke, also as loaded as the Lord, but apparently with no taste in clothing. Wanting to show LisaR the latest Dolce & Gabbana bra, she wore a sheer pink blouse over it, along with rainbow sequined shorts. Possibly something I would have worn to RHPS in the days when I went to the midnight movie, but anywhere else? <shakes head vehemently> While the cat was away, Mauricio had an agency party in L.A. When Kyle tried to call, he didn’t pick up, and she said he was probably drunk or stoned. It’s probably the only way he can deal with an association to any of these people.

Sutton joined the group for dinner, and while I wasn’t impressed with her day outfit, in a simple black dress, she outshone Kyle wearing a baggy sequined jumpsuit, and Erika, who looked like she was wearing a man’s black shirt, her dress barely covering her cheeks. Really it didn’t, since they were peeking out like she was wearing booty shorts. She informed Sutton that it was from Rhianna’s Fenty line, and in her interview, Sutton said that if God had collaborated with Tom Ford on the dress, it would still have been just as meaningless to her. A breath of fresh honesty. Dorit also carried the Jacquemus mini bag, which I find both adorable, and horrifying, since I can’t believe someone would pay almost 500 bucks for it, when there are people who can’t afford to eat.

Kyle was definitely clueless when it came to a runway show, not even recognizing her own samples, and Dorit stepped in to help her out. In her words, saving Kyle’s fashion show from Kyle. There was no one to save us from the clothes though, some of which were okay, but mostly reminded me of something a matronly woman would wear on a cruise. Sorry Kyle. All of the women were in the show, but no one can ever rival Ramona on the runway with her robotic look. Dorit complained that she got rewarded with clown shoes after bailing Kyle out. Teddi, who we found out was pregnant, had running commentary in her head, reminding herself not to walk in the way Kyle had imitated last season. Kyle also shouted directions from the wings, which didn’t seem very professional. Paris and Nicky Hilton also stopped by for a photo op, which Kyle hoped would boost the brand.

At the end of the show, Kyle said, everyone was so happy that day, it’s hard to imagine how terrible everything would become. Then the text said, Denise stopped filming in December, and a headline about a passionate affair between Denise and Brandi was shown. We saw Denise sit down, and a producer asked if she’s ready to talk.

FYI, after the fire and an extended period of living in hotels, Denise and Aaron are still not settled, but they are still having sex every day.

Best quote of the night, Garcelle in saying, it’s always time for a shot.

🦘 Calling It a Night While It’s Still Night…

Yesterday, it was late to bed, early to rise, and I’d like to even that out just a little. So leaving you with this oddly appropriate scene from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, which features a didgeridoo. It’s possibly my favorite scene from the film. I love the mesh of cultures. Stay safe. You know the drill.

Apr11

April 10, 2020 – GH Today, Double the Apology, LA Soon, Wives Next Week, Lu Tells All, Bethenny Responds, Randy’s Advice, DIY TP, Why, Your Personal Hogwarts, Tyler’s Gift, Prep Now, an Unlucky Number Of Quotes & Super

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

🩺 Just for the record, today’s General Hospital was the episode where Nelle left Michael to die in a burning car, and gave birth in the woods. All alone. Except for Obrecht.

Shahs of Sunset

Would they please change the opening song? Or at least move on to a different verse. It’s been eight seasons now of the same six lines.

GG and Destiney want to exude good fortune, so they go to a clinic to get fillers. Destiney doesn’t like needles, and in her interview, GG says she wants to get back in the swing of things, and forget she lost the pregnancy. With the physical pain of a needle, you feel the pain, and afterwards, it’s like a release. She realizes she sounds crazy. She tells Destiney that she wants to back to her life, and Destiney wants everyone to be on good terms with positive vibes. GG says, it’s wishful thinking. A couple of people are getting along with MJ, but personally, GG doesn’t want to be around her. In GG’s interview, she says MJ used to be there for her. We flash back to them being friends, and GG says MJ was a person who she felt secure to be around, but she doesn’t feel that way anymore. Owner Nayera says Destiney looks nervous, and tells her, don’t get scared. GG tells Nayera, she wants Botox, but not a whole lot. Nayera puts numbing cream on GG’s face. In her interview, GG says she’s been doing fillers since she was twenty-seven. It makes her feel amazing and fresh. Destiney can’t watch. GG tells Nayera that she wants a little everywhere, and Destiney compares it to basting a turkey. She tells GG that she’s crazy. Nayera puts numbing cream on Destiney’s lips, and GG holds Destiney’s hand while taking pictures with her other hand. GG says she hasn’t laughed this hard in so long. She’s going to have to wear diapers next time. After what she’s been through, it’s exactly what she needed.

Reza and Mike go to an arcade, and it looks like a blast. They play games for a while, then get drinks and something to eat. Reza tells the girl at the counter that he’s going to order an obscene amount of food. She introduces him to Guillermo del Pouro, their robotic bartender. The food comes, and it is an obscene amount, but it’s all fair food, like corn dogs and curly fries, and I wish I was there. Mike says he doesn’t like corn dogs, and Reza and I say, what? Mike asks when Reza became a white guy, and Reza says, when he married Adam. Their marriage is hanging on by a shred. Mike says, it all happened after the stupid accusations, and Reza says, that’s not lost on him. In Mike’s interview, he says he’s trying to get them to admit what they’ve done wrong. They both effed up. If MJ will take responsibility, maybe they can meet in the middle, and get it done. Mike tells Reza, if he’d taken the moral high ground, everyone would have been on his side. Reza says, sometimes bitches get caught up in their feelings. Mike says, Reza was upset and hurt, and retaliated. He had misdirected anger against Ali. In Reza’s interview, he says he needs to apologize. A real Persian man stands up in his truth, apologizes, moves forward, and doesn’t make the same mistake over again. Mike tells him, fix this, please.

In the car, MJ tells assistant Sienna that Tommy wants Baby Shams to learn Spanish rather than Farsi, but anyone can learn Spanish. Farsi is hard. Tommy says, no one cares about Farsi, and MJ says, gracias. MJ tells them, Reza texted that he hasn’t been in a good place since the rumors about Adam being unfaithful. He wasn’t ready to meet up when she texted, but he is now, if she’s willing. In MJ’s interview, she says, Reza has proven he’s despicable as a friend. He verbally assaulted her, assaulted and slandered her and her husband online, called the cops on her husband, and lawyered up. He’s on a tear. Who takes a friend to court over a broken bowl? She slept on it, and decided in order for them to heal as a group, she’s going to meet him. Tommy says Reza knew she almost died. He made it seem like she was sitting around like a puppet master. If he thinks she’s capable of that, he’s not her friend. That’s the reason people stopped hanging out with OJ. They couldn’t believe he was capable of murder. In her interview, MJ says she’s going to meet with Reza  because she wants to see if he has a decent bone in his body. Tommy tells her, Reza needs to grovel.

Nema meets with Annette and Vincenza, organizers of the Boots & Brew Country Music Festival. In his interview, Nema explains that they’re a multi-million dollar client, and his company creates branded content. We flash back to him helping GG with her cannabis business. He says they’re going to take an already cool thing, and make it ten times cooler on social media. Annette and Vincenza show him around the grounds. In Nema’s interview, he says he invited everyone. His invitations to Reza and MJ are personally selfish. He had to invite both of them, or the one who wasn’t invited would be mad, and he learned his lesson at Sara’s party that the element of surprise can go the wrong way. He’s hoping the collective beef will outweigh their individual beef.

In Destiney’s interview, she says she’s been seeing Sam for two months, It’s his birthday, and he’s coming to L.A. She likes nothing better than putting a smile on the face of someone she cares about. Their relationship is super casual, but that doesn’t mean she can’t be bougie and make him feel good. She goes to a swank hotel, where she’s gotten a suite. Sam arrives bearing roses. In her interview, Destiney says Sam’s sister definitely doesn’t want her talking to her brother. If Sara knew about it, she’d be flipping out. Clearly, she doesn’t give a sh*t.

Tommy calls MJ as she drives, and she tells him that she’s on her way to meet Reza. He asks, what’s the plan? and she says, to bring some sense into this sh*t. He says, she’s known Reza for thirty years, and she should handle it however she thinks she should. Reza is waiting when she gets to the restaurant. He gives her a shopping bag, and says, it’s a gift for the baby. He starts to cry, and says he originally got a baby bracelet, but flushed it down the toilet. He puts on his sunglasses to hide his tears. In MJ’s interview, she says the reason she’s skeptical is, she’s been down this road before. We flash back to Reza telling her that nothing can get between their bond, then fighting with her at the reunion, and then them hugging it out. He tells her he wanted to get a bottle of whiskey, but got something light to drink. MJ laughs, and says she didn’t know he was going to make her laugh right away. He says, it’s better than being angry, and asks how she is. She says she’s looking at her best friend of thirty years. He says he couldn’t respond after her text message. When he had to meet Ali, he thought they’d just be talking naked Jenga, but Ali brought a stack of papers. He was devastated, and asked Ali why he was doing this. He told Reza that MJ told him to do it. MJ says, that’s completely bullsh*t. She had Destiney telling her that Ali claimed she had set it up. Reza says, from that day, his life at home was a living hell. You can’t talk about things in someone’s marriage, and not think it won’t have a ripple effect. It made him a miserable human being. He didn’t have his best friend, and his husband was cheating. He was in the darkest place in his life without her. He can’t compare it with her being in the hospital, but he didn’t set out to hurt her on purpose. He was told his husband cheated, then Ali said Adam was sexually harassing other people, and that MJ had told him to bring Reza the information. He was going crazy. She asks why he didn’t call her, and he says, why didn’t she call him? She says she wishes she had. Reza blows his nose in a napkin, and MJ says he never gave her respect and love when it counted. He could have picked up the phone. It’s very effed up. Destiney lied, Ali lied, and she’s the person who fell on the sword giving birth, and lost her friend of thirty years. He popped off on her at the party, and put her personal information on Instagram. Tommy vandalized his landscaping, and here they are. He says Tommy called and said he’d kill Reza when he was on his way to Reza’s house. He and Adam were petrified in their own house. He freaked TF out. Then MJ was saying she wished everyone has a husband like Tommy, and she was glad he did that. MJ says, if she’s honest, she was holding onto things that happened at the pool party. Reza says he did the most vile thing, and he’ll try to make it up to her for the rest of his life. He wishes he could turn the clock back. He’s forgiven Tommy, and he’s not going to pursue any charges or do anything to hurt him. MJ appreciates it, and apologizes for anything  and everything Reza has been through. She’s sorry they’re not closer, and could be there for each other. Reza suggests taking it one step at a time. He wants to go slow, and see where it goes. He doesn’t expect anything; just a little crack so they can text occasionally, and see what happens. MJ says she looks forward to Reza meeting Shams, but Shams needs her right now. Reza says he understands, and asks if he can have a hug. Please. They hug, and she says he kind of smells weird, which is unusual. I’m guessing it’s nervous sweat, which can really stink. She tells him, if he wants to text, don’t hesitate. In Reza’s interview, he says he misses her, and it’s very sad.

Destiney and Sam go to a private room in the hotel restaurant, and order drinks. In Destiney’s interview, she says she’s trying to make his day special. They’re enjoying their time together, and not thinking about the future, but of course she is. They kiss, and Destiney orders steak for both of them. Sam suddenly starts acting really weird, and talking gibberish. In her interview, Destiney says, something is not right. This is not the Sam she’s been talking to. She doesn’t know if he’s on something. Sam adds burping to his craziness. In Destiney’s interview, she says, this isn’t good. She’s all about manners, and she’s over this sh*t. Frankly, I don’t know what to make of it either.

Nema arrives at the festival. In his interview, he says, it’s a Rolex-free day. He gives his drone operator Cody instructions. In Nema’s interview, he says he’s a pretty amazing producer. Part of his job is to work with the talent, and sometimes the talent is eccentric. He might be the best one to produce the group’s reconciliation. Methinks Nema is a tad narcissistic, although not necessarily in a bad way.

Shervin and Reza meet at Mike’s place. Mike says Shervin looks like a gay cowboy.

Sara goes to GG’s condo, and GG says her stomach is bloated. She’s going to need to stay in a wheelchair 80% of the time. In her interview, she says it’s been less than a week since her surgery. She tells Sara, she’s dying to get dressed like a cowgirl and yeehaw.

Destiney joins the others at Mike’s, and Mike wonders why she didn’t bring Sam. In Destiney’s interview, she says, Sam was like an abstract painting. She was super intrigued, and wanted to keep looking at it. She wanted to understand it, but then things changed. We see a clip of later in the evening of Sam’s birthday. He keeps burping, and being weird, and she quietly walks out with her suitcase. She says, they’re no longer talking. GG arrives, carrying a stick pony. Everyone gets into the limo.

Nema meets MJ at the festival, riding a scooter. She tells him that he looks stupid. He supposes there will be no panty dropping.

In the limo, Reza asks when GG saw MJ last, but she doesn’t remember. She says she’s not looking forward to it. She doesn’t think MJ is a good person. Frankly, I think MJ is a confused person, who had Vida for a mother, and misses her dad terribly.

Nema tells MJ the scooter is for GG. She had some medical sh*t go down, and needed emergency surgery. He didn’t think she was going to be able to come. In MJ’s interview, she says, once Shalom came into the picture, she and GG drifted apart. We flash back to MJ and Reza setting GG up by inviting Shalom’s ex to an event. MJ says, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t care when something serious happens. She asks Nema when GG had surgery, and he says a week and a half ago. She says she saw Reza, and he was crying the whole time. She just tried to appear calm, and listened to what he had to say.

Reza says he still forgives MJ, even though he knows she was involved. The limo parks, and they all get out. Nema scooters over to them, and MJ says, hey. Nema says he’ll show them the VIP area. GG complains that there’s no cup holder, and wants to roll up like gangsters. They do the slo-mo crew walk, and go to a tent that has tables and booze. They take a group photo, and Nema says he wouldn’t have thought this would happen two weeks ago. And I’m sure he’s mentally patting himself on the back. He says, Persian has gone country, and they wander around. They stop to eat, and GG says it’s the best mac and cheese she’s ever had. Nema admits to loving country music, and Reza asks if they can turn the volume down.

Suddenly, Mike gets up, and says he wants to ask a question. He asks if MJ knew about naked Jenga. We should have had a drinking game with that phrase. We’d have stayed drunk for weeks. In Mike’s interview, he says, in the past, his honesty has been questioned, and they need to come together and get the story straight. Someone needs to tell the truth. MJ says she wanted to tell Reza about the situation as soon as sh*t went down. Mike asks if she knew about the texts, or are the other two liars? She says she knew Ali wanted to bring up an issue with Reza, but he wasn’t clear on what the issue was. Mike says, the problem is, she’s lying. Ali has diarrhea of the mouth; there’s no way he didn’t give the details. He says he loves MJ, and wants her to speak the truth.

In Mike’s interview, he says, it can all be fixed if the truth is told. Reza says, when he sat with MJ, she wanted him to believe her hands were squeaky clean. He just wants to get to a better place. MJ thanks him, and says she appreciates everything about yesterday, but her hands aren’t clean. She knew about the Jenga texts, and knew Ali had an issue about it, but she doesn’t know what happened. Ali made it bigger than it was. She apologizes that they had to go through any of it. She’s sorry that when she found out, she didn’t think it was important enough tell them that she knew. Reza thanks her for taking accountability. In MJ’s interview, she says her intentions were to fix it. She has no problem apologizing, and wants to get to a better place. She thanks Reza, and asks if they can be friends again. He says, absolutely. He’d like to get to a place where they can move forward. They have a lot of chapters, and MJ says they’ll have a lot more. In GG’s interview, she says MJ has been Reza’s BFF for thirty years, and she feels for him. She wants to open his eyes, but he needs to go through it to understand it for himself; there’s no making up with MJ. Mike says he’s proud of MJ for mending the disconnect in the friendship.

They do some line dancing, and GG says she needs to lie down flat somewhere. She goes to the limo, and the others get ice cream. Shervin follows GG, and she tells him to get an ambulance; she’s having a piercing pain. A producer asks if she wants a medic. In her interview, GG says she has a high threshold for pain, so it must be a lot. She tells the medic that she had surgery recently, and he says she has three incisions that could be open. The others run back to the limo, and Shervin tells them what’s going on. Reza thinks GG should go to the hospital, and not risk it. GG says she’d rather go closer to where she lives. She thinks it’s because she hadn’t eaten, and then ate to much mac and cheese. She’s lactose intolerant. MJ tells her to stay lying in the same position. In GG’s interview, she says she guesses MJ woke up on the right side of the bed. She’s being compassionate and caring, and wants to be the big sister. But GG knows tomorrow, MJ might not wake up on that same side. The group heads back.

Mike shakes his head, saying, too much mac and cheese? What? MJ calls to see how GG is doing, and Mike says, she’s sitting up and blowing kisses toward the phone. GG gives him the finger, and he says, now she’s making a heart sign. She tells him it’s for him, not MJ. MJ says they sound like drunken clowns, and Mike says, they are drunken clowns. GG says, it hurts to laugh.

Next time, MJ surprises Destiney by inviting Ali to their meeting; Reza says Adam doesn’t have respect for their marriage; Nema tells his mother, because his childhood was traumatic, it’s strengthened his resolve not to have children.

💰 Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles will begin their new season on May 5th.

💋 The new season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills begins April 15th.

👩🏻‍💻 Zooming Along…

The Countess dishes the quarantine dirt.

https://extratv.com/2020/04/02/luann-de-lesseps-recalls-dying-of-laughter-with-rhony-cast-on-zoom-plus-she-talks-new-season/

👏🏻 Bethenny Claps Back…

On giving her the middle finger.

https://www.cheatsheet.com/entertainment/bethenny-frankel-said-rhony-premiere-gave-her-the-middle-finger.html/

And giving back.

https://extratv.com/2020/04/07/bethenny-frankel-reacts-to-rhony-premiere-plus-how-shes-giving-back-with-bstrong/

🎹 It’s No Short People…

A PSA from Randy Newman.

https://pagesix.com/2020/04/08/randy-newman-writes-coronavirus-musical-psa-stay-away/

🧻 For the Bored Or Overly Ambitious…

Or if you’re really desperate.

https://theoutdoorwear.com/an-easy-guide-to-making-toilet-paper-at-home/

🚽 Because We’re All Wondering…

A possible explanation on the shortage.

http://www.eatingwell.com/article/7764104/toilet-paper-shortage/

🔮 Get Your Harry Potter On…

Even Hogwarts has free online classes.

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/lifestyle/a32098959/hogwarts-free-online-classes/

🎁 My Man Tyler…

One more reason to watch Temptation Tuesday.

http://www.eatingwell.com/syndication/tyler-perry-pays-groceries-for-elderly-amid-coronavirus/

🗽 And a Side of Ramona…

Instead of watching the GH rerun, Bravo had a marathon of an old favorite, NYC Prep. I loved this series, and was very disappointed when they didn’t have a second season. For the most part, it was awful rich kids, who I figured would turn into equally awful adults. For whatever reason, this article also plopped a Ramona (Real Housewives of New York) video interview in the middle of it, so it’s double the fun.

https://www.usmagazine.com/entertainment/pictures/nyc-prep-cast-where-are-they-now/

🗯 Quotes of the Week

The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you. – B. B. King

My morning fiber cookie has better taste than Sophie. – Han (Matthew Moy), 2 Broke Girls

To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now. – Fred Rogers

She’s at track number none. – Robert Springs, Pillow Talk: 90 Day Fiancé, referring to a cast member meeting a probable catfish

Do what is right, not what is easy nor what is popular. – Roy T. Bennett

Just because things hadn’t gone the way I had planned didn’t necessarily mean they had gone wrong. – Ann Patchett

For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. – Oscar Wilde

Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be. – Abraham Lincoln

Do one thing every day that scares you. – Eleanor Roosevelt

If I ever hear it again after quarantine, I’ll just burst in tears and curl up on the floor. – Daisy Tainton of Queens, whose neighbor keeps playing the same Ed Sheeran song, over and over, from The City

Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. – George Bernard Shaw

Guests of guests don’t bring guests. – Jessie Leavitt, NYC Prep

🏋️‍♀️ Yes, It’s Still Called a Weekend…

And you made it to another one. Since no Dead are walking, see you on Deck on Monday. Stay safe, and wishing you a blessed Easter and Passover.

Apr10

April 9, 2020 – The Other Half Of the Necklace, a Sleepover In the Hamptons, Trolls Inspire Chefs & Rainbow

Posted on by
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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Sasha finds Willow at the hospital, and hugs her. Willow says, don’t tell Chase she was crying, but Sasha says, he probably figured it out; he’s a sharp guy. Willow says she knows she’s too close to this, and has to get emotional perspective. Sasha says she’s learned something about stress while developing spa products for Deception. The body doesn’t differentiate between physical, mental, and emotional stress. It doesn’t know the difference, and emotional stress is often the toughest to deal with. Willow says, okay. So she’s a wreck. Sasha says, the next part is just her theory, but she thinks Willow’s body can’t tell the difference between her love for Wiley when Willow thought he was her son, and now.

Chase tells Michael, he realizes Wiley is a priority, and Michael says, Willow is too. She’s more than a friend, and important in Wiley’s life. He can see what this is doing to her, and if it helps, she doesn’t have to testify in the custody hearing. Chase says, that will just make it worse. Willow needs to feel like she’s doing something positive for Wiley. If her getting on the stand will tip the scale, even a little bit, she’ll be thrilled. She’d do anything for that little boy. We flash back to Willow in court against Shiloh when he thought Wiley was his son. She says she had a baby, but Shiloh will never find him. He’s evil and vile. Diane tells her, stop talking, but she continues to go off on Shiloh. She says the only thing Shiloh cares about is himself. He’ll never, ever find her child. The judge tells Diane to handle her client, and Diane tells Willow to sit down. The judge says Willow admitted to having a baby, and has to turn the records over to the court. Willow says she won’t, and he cites her for being in contempt. Chase cuffs her, and reads her rights.

Nina tells Jax, after the disaster that was Sasha, she accepted the fact that she miscarried, and moved on. But she’s still holding on to that stupid necklace. Jax says he’s seen her holding it, and she says her mother gave it to her. Her mother hated her, and tried to kill her twice, once by accident, and once on purpose, because she wanted to get her hands on Nina’s money. She left the necklace in a box of things she’d bequeathed to Nina, along with a cryptic note. Two halves come together to mend a broken heart. Nina couldn’t help thinking maybe the baby survived.

Nelle says Carly should have known her, and welcomed her as a sister. Carly says, they’re not… related. Nelle says she can’t even say the word – sisters. That’s how much she hates it, and wishes it wasn’t true. They have the same father, and that makes them sisters. Carly says Frank wasn’t her father. He was a loser her adoptive mother married, and he ghosted them before she had a chance to know him. They only met once. She tracked him down in a crap apartment in Miami, trying to get a fraction of the child support he owed her mother. Nelle says he wasn’t Carly’s father until she wanted money, and Carly says she didn’t get one dime. She didn’t know Nelle was Josslyn’s kidney donor, or that Frank even had a daughter. Nelle says, she knew. Carly saw her.

Miami, 1995. Young Carly goes to an apartment. Frank opens the door (James Patrick Stuart, Valentin), and asks if he can help her. She says, Frank Benson? and he says, who’s asking? She says, Caroline Benson, and he says, Virginia’s little girl? How did she find him? She says, Ken Richardson knew someone who knew someone who knew his address. He says she’s lucky. They’re leaving soon. He has a business opportunity that’s a pretty sweet deal. She wonders if he’s even going to ask about her mom, and he says, how’s her mother? Still the same? Carly says she’s doing well, and he asks if they’re still in the same house, but Carly says they moved when she was in first grade for a neighborhood with better schools. He says she’s all grown up, and asks what she wants from him. She says he owes her mother fourteen years of unpaid child support. She’s there to collect. He says she must have her wires crossed. Virginia was the one who wanted to adopt her. Carly says, he didn’t want her, so he shouldn’t have pay? He says, if she wants to put it like that. A little girl comes out, and asks who she is.

Jason tells Josslyn, he doesn’t think Nelle can do or say anything that outweighs the facts. She asks if he thinks Michael will win, and he says, the facts are on Michael’s side. She says it’s cool how he sees things so clearly, and he says, not always. She says, more than the others do. She wishes he’d been there when Nelle first got to Port Charles. He would have seen right through her. We flash back to Nelle seeing Josslyn in the MetroCourt. She says it’s been a while, and Josslyn says, things have been tense between Nelle and her family. Nelle agrees, but they’re cool, right? Besides, they’re kind of family now. Josslyn is going to be the baby’s aunt. Is she ready for that? We move to Nelle asking if Josslyn is okay with her marrying Michael. Josslyn says she thought Nelle and Michael belonged together. It’s just that right now… Nelle says, Josslyn is thinking about her mom. She’s been thinking about Carly too. Sonny says he bets she has, and Nelle says she’s hoping Carly gets better, comes home, and accepts the baby, and her along with it. Josslyn hopes she’s right, and Nelle says she has one favor to ask. Will Josslyn be her maid of honor? Josslyn hesitates, but says, yes, of course (🍷). We move to Josslyn giving Nelle a beautiful hair clip on the day of the wedding. Josslyn says it belonged to her grandmother. She gave it to Josslyn’s mom, and her mom gave it to her. She’s loaning it to Nelle. It can be her old, borrowed, and blue, but she needs it back. Nelle says, of course (🍷). Josslyn says she thought Nelle should have something that tied everything together, other than Michael and the baby. Nelle suggests they take a photo to send to Josslyn’s mom, so she can see something that will tie her to the wedding, even if she can’t be there. In the present, Jason tells Josslyn, if Nelle never came, there would be no Wiley. Josslyn says, maybe not. Wiley is worth everything.

Nelle tells Carly, she came to see them just before they moved to Tampa. Her father was excited; he’d missed Carly. Her father asked Carly to stay and spend time with the family. Carly says, that didn’t happen, but Nelle says, she heard the whole thing. Carly says, oh my God. She was there. The little blond girl was her. Nelle says, Frank wanted them to be sisters, and asked her to stay. Why didn’t she? Everything would have been different. Carly could have taken care of her, but Carly was too selfish. She didn’t care that they traveled around and moved all the time, chasing deals that never closed. They were always poor, but Carly just wanted to come to Port Charles and have a fabulous life, and that’s what she did. She left Nelle. In 1995, Frank tells Nelle to go to the kitchen and have some cereal; he’s busy. Nelle says they don’t have any, and he says, then have a cookie. Carly says she guesses Frank wanted Nelle, but has no money for her. He says, not a dime, and she says, okay. Then tell her about her birth parents.

Nina tells Jax that Valentin visited her mother in prison before she died. Her mother told him that Nina had carried the baby to term; a little girl who was given up for adoption. Jax wonders if Valentin was lying to set the groundwork for Sasha. Nina doesn’t think he did, but her mother could have been lying out of spite. She was very jealous of Nina, and the money she’d inherited. Maybe it was one last dig at her. He says she doesn’t sound convinced, and Nina says, no. She just has a feeling she can’t shake. An instinct that she has a daughter out there somewhere.

Nelle tells Carly, everything that happened was because Carly couldn’t be bothered to take care of her. What Frank said was the truth. Carly says, it’s not true. Frank never asked her to stay. He sent Nelle into the other room, and said he didn’t have any money and never wanted to adopt her. He didn’t consider Carly a daughter. He knew her mother was Barbara Jean Spencer, and knew she’d moved to Port Charles. Later, he found out Carly had moved there and had money. That’s when he began calling her his daughter. Nelle says, he kept Carly’s baby rattle, but Carly says he was probably going to pawn it, but forgot. He gave Nelle a story, twisting things so he’d look good. He sold Nelle’s kidney. He was a weak selfish man who exploited Nelle, but she doesn’t have to be like him. She can go in a different direction. Carly did. After she had Michael, she realized she could be better. Not perfect, but she could give Michael what he needed, and put him first. When she did, her life was better. Nelle can do that; put Wiley first. Nelle says, by handing him over to Michael, and Carly says, let Michael have full custody, and she’ll have visitation rights. She can build a relationship with Wiley, while Wiley stays in a home that he knows, and where he’s happy. Nelle says, happier than he’d be with her, because she can never be good enough. Carly says Nelle has a chance prove she’s good enough, and give up what she wants, so Wiley can have what he needs. Nelle says Carly wants her to give up the suit too. If Carly thinks she’s going to let get Monica and Bobbie get away with malpractice, think again. She’s going to leave the hospital bankrupt, and it’s Carly’s fault. All of it is Carly’s fault. Nelle never did anything Carly didn’t do. We flash back to Nelle telling Carly that she has an idea everyone is going to love. Whether the baby is a boy or girl, she’s going to name it Morgan. We move on to Nelle planting a scarf like Morgan’s in Carly’s office, saying, let the haunting begin, and Carly finding it, making the connection. We move to Nelle leaving Carly the note that says, find me where you left me tonight, and spraying Morgan’s cologne in the graveyard. Carly arrives there, and says she knows that smell, and calls out to Morgan. We see Nelle and Carly struggle over the baby blanket, and Nelle falling down the stairs. We move to Nelle telling Carly that Michael proposed, and saying she can call Carly mom.

Carly says Nelle sounds like Frank, and Nelle says, see you in court, sister. She leaves, and we go back to young Carly. Carly tells Frank, her mom said he handled the adoption. Who were they? He says, who knows? and she says, he does. She knows the adoption agency rejected them, but he told Virginia he could still find her a baby. He had connections; who was it? He tells her not to ask questions she doesn’t want the answer to, and she says, they can’t be worse than him. Tell her. He says he doesn’t know who her father is, and doubts her mother would know, given her profession. She was a hooker, and Carly’s father was one of her many johns. Her madam said they could adopt her for a fee. It was more than he was willing to spend, but Virginia had to have a baby. Carly asks for a name, and Frank says, what does it matter? He tells her it was Ruby Anderson’s house. Her mother was Ruby’s niece, Barbara Jean Spencer. Carly asks if he knows what happened to her, but he doesn’t. He says, given her choice of profession, he hopes Carly isn’t looking for a warm and fuzzy reunion. She tells him, go to hell, and he says don’t blame him if she doesn’t like the answers to her questions. Give his regards to Virginia. Maybe he’ll look her up. Carly says, try it, and she’ll kill him.

Michael tells Chase, Nelle is a nightmare, but she did do good. Chase says, Wiley? and Michael says, all of it. Willow loved Wiley for a year and a half when she thought he was her child, but when she found out he wasn’t hers, her love wasn’t wasted. She’s part of Wiley’s life, and that wouldn’t have happened without Nelle. We flash back to Willow sitting with Wiley in Kelly’s, and telling him that she wants to be his mother, but that’s what she wants. She knows he wants to be with the family he has; Brad and Lucas. She’d never take him away from the daddies he loves. She prays they have their own relationship, and someday when he’s old enough, and comes to her with questions, he’ll understand why she chose to leave him, because she wants his happiness more than her own. She is his mommy, and loves him with all her heart. We move to Willow asking Chase if they’re at the point where she has to check in with him to say yes to being her own son’s guardian. He asks if there’s not an app for that. He’s not surprised; she deserves to be his guardian. She obviously loves him.

Sasha says, Willow went to jail rather than admit Shiloh was Wiley’s father. Willow says, he wasn’t, but Sasha says, that’s not the point. Her instinct as a mom was to protect at any cost, and that didn’t change when she found out Wiley wasn’t her biological child. Willow says he’s at risk from a vile, selfish woman who wants to use him as a weapon. Of course (🍷) she wants to protect him. But it’s not enough to be protective. She has to do something. We flash back to Willow telling Chase that Wiley isn’t her child by birth, but she’s part of his life. He’s not Michael’s child, but Michael loves him anyway, and she doesn’t love him any less. Chase says she didn’t feel that way before; it was the exact opposite. She says she misses him so much, and Chase says, before she makes a decision, take a breath. He knows Michael is thinking about what’s best for Wiley, but he’s thinking about what’s best for her. At the hospital in the present, Sasha says Willow is the closest thing Wiley has to a mother; Nelle doesn’t count. Willow says, Wiley needs her, and she’s got to stand up for him.

Nina tells Jax, it’s not irrefutable, but it’s a custom piece, so there’s no way to trace it. He says he knows a good security firm who could retrace her mother’s movement after Nina went into the coma. She says, Valentin already did that, and Jax says just because Valentin failed, doesn’t mean he will. She appreciates it, but she’s not sure she wants to set herself up for disappointment. It’s a deep dark rabbit hole she’s already been down, and she’s not sure she wants to risk it again. Josslyn comes in, and Jax asks what she’s doing on the loose. She says she was going stir crazy at Sonny’s. One of the bodyguards drove her over. If he’s busy… Nina says, no. Josslyn’s father is distracting her from what she needs to do. Josslyn would be doing her a favor to get him out. Jax asks if he can take Josslyn to lunch, but she says she has volleyball practice. He can drive her though; the bodyguard can follow them. He says he’ll see Nina later. As they leave, he says, maybe Josslyn should drive. She says, in that case, let’s take the Porsche.

Carly goes to see Jason, who says, she just missed Josslyn. Carly asks what she was doing there, and Jason says Josslyn wanted him to promise Nelle won’t get Wiley. She asks what Jason told her, and he says he told her it was too soon for promises. They have to see how it plays out. Carly wishes he’d said tomorrow Nelle was going to magically disappear, and then made that happen.

Jason asks if Carly thinks Michael could live with that. We flash back to Carly telling Sonny that Michael will never retaliate against Nelle; not in any real way that makes a difference. That’s why they have to make the decision for him. They have to remove that psycho bitch from their lives, once and for all. We move to Carly telling Michael to let Diane crush Nelle; no backing off. No convincing himself to compromise for Wiley’s sake. Michael says, there is no compromising with Nelle. He has to win sole custody, for Wiley’s sake. In the present, Carly tells Jason that Michael is a better person than she is, and he says he thinks they’re both good people.

Jacksonville, 1996. Carly is ready to leave, when Virginia comes in. She says, good; Carly is still there. Carly says she wanted to say goodbye, and Virginia asks if she’s supposed to thank Carly; she’s still leaving. Carly says wish her good luck, and Virginia says, luck is a lie. Carly says she’d rather take the lie than be stuck there. Virginia says, thanks. She doesn’t want to fight. She loves Carly. Carly says she knows, and loves Virginia too. Virginia hopes Carly finds what she’s looking for – which isn’t money. Carly says, maybe not, but it wouldn’t hurt. Virginia says what Carly is looking for is love, and to be valued and accepted. She hopes Carly finds that, and hopes she finds someone who believes in her. Carly says she believes in herself, and Virginia says she believes in Carly, but Carly doesn’t want to hear that from her. She wants to figure it out on her own, and she will. They hug, and Carly picks up her bags. She says, here goes nothing, and leaves. In 2020, Carly tells Jason, she went to see Nelle at Crimson. It’s okay, but they had it out. Nelle unloaded her grudges, and said what she blames Carly for. At one point, Carly tried to explain how she turned her life around. How she’d been a liar, but managed to change into a halfway decent person. Jason says, more than halfway. Carly says, she told Nelle it was because of Michael, but it was also because of Jason.

Carly tells Jason, the night she showed up on his doorstep, she had nowhere else to go. he let her in, and it changed everything. She’d never had that. She should feel sorry for Nelle, and she almost does, but she’s mostly grateful to have Jason. We flash back to Carly hugging Jason, and says she can’t believe he’s there. He’s alive. She missed him so much. There’s so much she wants to tell him, and say to him. He tells her, take a deep breath, and count to ten. We move on to Carly visiting Jason in the hospital, and telling him about being pregnant with Donna. She says he has to do whatever she wants for the next seven months. He says, if that’s what she needs, they’ll figure it out. Tell him about the baby. She says she’s scared, nervous, and surprised. She never thought she’d be having another baby, but now that she knows, she’s excited. He says he’s excited for her. We move to Jason telling Carly that he would have done anything to get her out of that place; even team up with Franco. He’s sorry she got taken to Ferncliff. She says she knew he’d get her out, and he says he should have that night, but he let himself be talked into waiting. Carly says, she let herself be talked into pleading insanity. They both messed up. From now on, they trust their own instincts, especially when it comes to each other. Deal? He says, deal. She says she knew he’d come to get her, and he did. In the present, Jason says, the night Carly showed up was the best thing that ever happened to him. They hug.

Nina looks at the necklace for the 47,506th time. She flashes back to giving the other half to Sasha at Windymere. Sasha says she can’t, and Nina says, of course (🍷) she can. Obrecht says, it’s a significant gift, but Sasha says, it’s too much. Nina says there’s no such thing when it comes to Sasha. It’s not the original, but she had it made, and it fits her piece. She puts the necklace on Sasha, and says, it’s a perfect fit, just like them. We move on to Nina’s wedding, and Nina telling Sasha, all she needs to do is tell everyone she’s Nina’s daughter. Sasha says she’s sorry, but she’s not. Nina says Sasha lied to her with every beat of her heart. She doesn’t have a heart; she’s nothing. Nina pulls the necklace off of her.

Nelle goes through her trinket box, flipping through letters that were returned, and looking at Carly’s baby rattle. We see the other half of the necklace still in the box, and then a split-screen with Nina looking at it.

On Monday, Nina says, maybe she’s more like Nelle than she wants to admit; Laura meets with Valentin; and Lulu says she’s come to say goodbye to someone in jail. In Port Charles, this could be anyone.

👍🏽 This is amazingly clever. Not only are they stretching out the episodes with these flashbacks, anyone who’s home and just beginning to watch, or watching after a long time of not seeing the show, is filled in. And those of us who’ve kept up are still getting a new backstory. To top it off, we’ve gotten a possible reveal as to who Nina’s daughter is, or another layer in that mystery. I’m beyond impressed. Good job, GH!

The Real Housewives of New York City

As Sonja and Tinsley walk to a rooftop for lunch, Sonja says, guys keep trying to pick them up; ignore them. They sit down with their food, and Tinsley says Sonja was jumping on the Dorinda bandwagon. She’s acting like she doesn’t know Tinsley, and she’s not open and honest. Sonja tells her, she said Dorinda didn’t know Tinsley, and Tinsley says, Dorinda is calling her a liar. She’s saying Tinsley was still with Scott when she wasn’t. Sonja says Tinsley went on a trip with him, and Tinsley says, when they were broken up, there was no arrangement for her to get money from him. In Sonja’s interview, she says she’s heard that Tinsley and Scott have been together since they broke up. Tinsley is the only woman she knows who’s gotten clothes and bling after a break-up. Leah joins them, and Sonja says they were talking about Dorinda claiming Tinsley isn’t being truthful. Tinsley tells her, she can only say it so many times. Dorinda turned on her when she’s always been a friend. In Leah’s interview, she says, maybe Tinsley confides in her and Sonja because they don’t call her a hooker. If Dorinda treated her that way, she wouldn’t tell the bitch what she had for lunch. Tinsley says Dorinda was implying she’s not being truthful, but she’s allowed to go back and forth in a relationship. It’s her effing life. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she didn’t know she had to share every detail of her relationship with Dorinda. Leah tells them, Ramona called her, and wants her to come to the Hamptons. Sonja asks if Leah has any tattoos, and Leah says she has several, but she’s having the tramp stamp of her name removed. It was her first tattoo. Sonja asks if she had her name put there, so when she’s having sex, the guy can remember her name. In Sonja’s interview, she says she thinks tattoos are a negative thing. You’re defecating you’re body. She realizes what defecating means, and settles on defaming. And actually, I think what she really meant to say is defacing. Read a book once in a while, Sonja. She tells Leah that she never has sex with men who have tattoo. In her interview, Leah says she’s sure Sonja wouldn’t kick a young, hot guy out of bed for having an anchor tattoo.

Dorinda’s housekeeper Len helps her pack. Dorinda says, it’s a weird time for the Hamptons, since it’s hot/cold. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, it’s good to hear that Ramona is going to be the lady of the manor, and overseeing the group. She hopes her bedroom is way upstairs, and Tinsley’s is way downstairs. I liked Dorinda in the beginning, but with each season, she works my last nerve harder.

In the Hamptons, LuAnn meets Ramona at a restaurant. While LuAnn waits at the table, Ramona stops by the bar to give a dude her phone number. In Ramona’s interview, she says she’s a born flirt. The day she doesn’t flirt, she’ll be dead. She tells LuAnn that she has a storyboard. She’d like to have a commitment, but not be married. LuAnn thinks she sounds like a serial killer. In LuAnn’s interview, she says she can’t imagine what’s on Ramona’s board. D*ck pics? LuAnn thinks the slumber party will be fun, and Ramona says she wants to bond. She has a room for LuAnn that has a separate bathroom. LuAnn says she doesn’t want to be favored. Like I believe that. In Ramona’s interview, she says she doesn’t want a repeat of the fish room, and we flash back to LuAnn’s tantrum. She tells LuAnn she made sure to give her a nice room where it’s quiet, so if Tinsley and Sonja are going crazy, she doesn’t have to hear it. She also invited Leah, and wants Dorinda to get to know her. LuAnn says she likes Leah. The first thing Leah told her is that she’d been arrested. Ramona asks, for what? and LuAnn says, assaulting a police officer; she was nineteen. Ramona says she’s sure that broke the ice and took down the barriers. In her interview, Ramona says, how many of them have gotten arrested? Of course they bonded. She’s hoping they can all come together as a group.

At Tinsley’s hotel apartment, she feeds Strawberry and Shortcake. She tells them, they were vegan at the shelter, but aren’t now. In her interview, she says she went to China to help with rescues, and had to come home with them. They speak Chinese, and she has to learn it to communicate with them. She uses a translator app to tell them, good girl. I understand this, since I once walked a dog who only understood Russian, and I had to learn several phrases.

Sonja picks up Dorinda, who’s bringing flowers and vibrators, but only three of the latter. I guess some of them will have to share? LuAnn tells housekeeper Alice that she’s headed to Ramona’s for the night. Alice asks, why? and LuAnn says, that’s a good question. Ramona prepares some food, and gives Coco a carrot. In her interview, she says Coco is all she’s got, and the dog is going deaf. This is probably a blessing for Coco. Or maybe she’s just faking Ramona out. Leah picks up Tinsley, who has some kind of throat issue, and can barely talk. Leah says Dorinda said some wild-ass sh*t about Tinsley at the party. In Leah’s interview, she says she survived an all-girls Catholic school on the Upper East Side. But this is on their turf, so she’s going to be on high alert. Tinsley croaks out that she’ll have to write things like, yeah, bitch.

In Dorinda’s interview, she says she didn’t give Leah a fair chance. Since she’s Tinsley’s friend, it’s harder not to be judgmental. There’s guilt by association. Sonja tells Ramona that Leah has tattoos everywhere. She has her name on her backside. Ramona says, this girl is gangster. Dorinda and Sonja get to Ramona’s place first, and Dorinda gifts Ramona with a frozé (frozen rosé) maker. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Dorinda gives good presents. Last year, she brought mermaid outfits; this year, a frozé machine. Dorinda says she’s excited about having a glass or nine of pinot. LuAnn arrives, and Coco pees on the hydrangeas. I’m not sure if that’s a statement.

Tinsley and Leah join the women. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, when it comes to Tinsley, it’s see no evil, hear no evil, but she can’t say speak no evil. Ramona tells Leah that she’s a guest, and has free access to everything if she’s at Ramona’s house, so make herself at home. Ramona shows LuAnn to her room, which is basically the entire finished basement. Ramona calls it the lower level, and in her interview, LuAnn says, that’s like putting her in the attic and calling it the penthouse. She’s always lowest on the totem pole when comes to rooms on vacations. The lack of consideration is mind blowing. Good Lord, it’s not that bad, and she has her own bathroom and a TV. She asks Ramona, what happened to the nicest room in the house? and Ramona tells her that she said LuAnn would have privacy. LuAnn wonders how to adjust the air conditioning, since she’s freezing, but Ramona says she can’t. She suggests a blanket, but LuAnn says she doesn’t want to sleep with air conditioning, and Ramona promises to figure it out. Ramona says she’s not surprised LuAnn and Leah bonded, since neither one of them drink, and they were both arrested. Lu Ann tries to work the TV remote in her basement private room.

On the phone, Dorinda deals with a contractor for Bluestone Manor. In her interview, she says the heating, electrical, and duct systems had to be ripped out. She’s overwhelmed, and still has to live her normal life. It seems like it never ends. Sonja asks Dorinda what’s going on, and Dorinda says she’s overwhelmed, and has to get her sh*t together. Sonja says Dorinda has a lot on her plate with the Berkshires house being flooded, and Dorinda says every day it’s another $15K. She doesn’t want to cry, but she’s doing everything, and none of it well. She wishes someone could step in and make it all better. Me too, Dorinda. me too. She says there’s nothing carefree about her anymore, and she’s not nice to anybody. Her mother said she’s wound too tight, and it’s not healthy. In her interview, Dorinda says she feels like she did after Richard died. She doesn’t know who to turn to. Sonja says, it doesn’t make John and less of a man, and Dorinda says, he’s just different. In her Dorinda’s interview, she says, John wants to be as helpful as he can, but he never had responsibilities like this. The only person she can discuss things with is herself. Sonja says Dorinda has too many balls in the air. How can she catch them all? In Sonja’s interview, she says, when Dorinda blows up, she can really rip you a new one, and she’s admitting it. LuAnn sits with them, and Dorinda says she’s having a cry. LuAnn asks, what’s the matter? and Sonja says Dorinda is spread too thin.

Leah gives Ramona a candle from Joe Malone, and Ramona loves it. She questions the sheer bucket hat Leah is wearing, as do I, although she’s surprisingly diplomatic, saying she doesn’t know if she could pull it off. She tells Leah that she was a buyer for Macy’s, and started her own company at thirty, after being on her own at sixteen. Leah says her parents threw her out at seventeen, but she deserved it. They told her to go figure herself out. She became rebellious when they moved from NYC to Connecticut when she was thirteen. She says, in hindsight, she learned perseverance, and how to deal with adversity. They join the others outside.

In Ramona’s interview, she says Leah is okay, but that hat, not so much. Leah doesn’t mind anyone criticizing her hat, as long as they don’t criticize her character. Ramona tells the women that they’re leaving for dinner at seven. She wonders how she can agree with a woman who has tattoo. In Leah’s interview, she says, it’s not like she has a penis tattooed across her forehead, or a gun tattooed on her neck. I’m kind of surprised that a bunch of New York City women are this weird about it myself. In Ramona’s interview, she says she doesn’t know what a tramp stamp is, but it doesn’t sound nice. Dorinda says if she forgets Leah’s name, she can just tell her to turn around. In her interview, Leah wonders if Dorinda ever leaves her 1% Upper East Side bubble. Dorinda says she needs a nap. When she leaves, Leah asks how Dorinda knew her name was on her back, and Sonja says she told her. Leah says she’s not having the comments. Get over it; everybody has tattoos nowadays. Sonja goes upstairs, and Ramona whines that no one is helping to clean up, so Leah and Tinsley do it, as Ramona sits with her bottle of vodka.

Leah calls her daughter, who’s had a bad first day of school. She says it’s not the same, and she hates everyone in her class. Leah tells her that she’ll have to make the best of it.  In her interview, Leah says she understands not fitting in. In school, she was the weird girl who lived downtown. That’s what she is again. She tells her daughter, it’s just the first day. See how it goes. Tinsley asks Sonja why she told Dorinda about Leah’s tramp stamp, and Sonja says she thought it was shocking and funny. Tinsley says, Dorinda is being mean, but Sonja says, Dorinda has a lot on her plate. She’s angry, and taking it out on people. Tinsley says Sonja can’t make excuses for her, but Sonja says, Dorinda is going through a rough time. Leah joins them, and says the only person making her uncomfortable is Dorinda. Sonja says, Dorinda is in a bad place, but Leah says she is too. She misses her kid, who had a bad day at school, and she’s dealing with sh*t too. In Sonja’s interview, she says she wants to be there for Dorinda. She’s in a tough place, and Sonja wants to protect her. Tinsley tells Leah to be careful talking about how she feels to Sonja, since she’ll run with it to Dorinda.

Ramona tells everyone to hurry up. Sonja relays Leah’s comments to Dorinda, and when they gather to leave, Dorinda tells Leah that she thought she was being funny. Leah says it’s her delivery, and she senses a lot of hostility. Dorinda informs her that none of them have a tattoo. In Dorinda’s interview, she says that her mother told her that people with tattoos were potential kidnappers, and she believed it. Um… my father got a tattoo in the Navy. What is wrong with these people? LuAnn joins them, and says she missed whatever was going on, and Sonja fills her in. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, good try, Sonja, but you’re not helping. Leah says she and Dorinda haven’t even talked, and Dorinda is making generalizations. Dorinda says she doesn’t know Leah, and Leah says she gets the feeling Dorinda doesn’t want to, but hopes she’s wrong. They get in the limo.

The women go to a restaurant in Sag Harbor. Sonja thinks Ramona should move to LA, since she can’t stop socializing. This is New York; act like a New Yorker. Leah orders a mocktail, and in LuAnn’s interview, she says it’s nice to have a wingman who’s confident to order a mocktail. It can be tough to be around the ladies while they’re drinking. Tinsley hopes a martini heals her voice. LuAnn makes a toast, saying this year was her roughest ever. It was like a volcano erupted, and the ashes came out. She was so busy taking care herself, she didn’t realize the ashes fell on them too. She didn’t know what to do, or how to react, and didn’t realize how much it weighed on them. It’s tough going through recovery, healing, and renewal, and she wants to make amends. She tells them how much she loves them, and says it hasn’t been easy. She thanks them, and in Sonja’s interview, she says, it’s the new and improved LuAnn. Something had to be said, since it was the elephant in the room. She’s glad LuAnn had respect enough for them to do it. They share an octopus dish, and I think about how I used to like octopus until I saw a diver playing with one, and it’s now off my things-to-eat list.

Ramona’s friend Lori calls her from inside the restaurant, and Ramona suggests she come over. Dorinda asks if Ramona is with them or elsewhere tonight. They were supposed to have dinner together, and she thinks Ramona is being rude, and should be present. LuAnn points out that Ramona’s chair is facing out, so she can look around. Ramona says it’s not like she’s an alcoholic; she just likes to be social. In her interview, she says how can she socialize too much? She’s a single woman, with no man. She needs to be social. Sonia reminds Ramona that she’d said she wanted younger friends. Dorinda says Sonja was stirring the pot this afternoon, and Sonja says Leah misunderstood her, and she wants to get to know Leah. Leah says next time, she’ll speak to Dorinda directly. In her interview, Leah says she’s not that offended. It’s not the worst thing anyone’s ever said to her, but she’s got her eye on Dorinda now. She tells them to enjoy her tramp stamp while they can, since it’s going to be gone soon, and Dorinda says, Sonja is the one who started talking about it. Sonja says that’s because she knows what it’s like to be a tramp. In Dorinda’s interview, she admits to making an unfair judgment about Leah. She holds her own, which Dorinda likes, tramp stamp and all. Ramona says she’s going to do a lap, and scope the room. In LuAnn’s interview, she thinks the whole town must have Ramona’s digits by now. Ramona is in costume; boobs out, going to war. Sonja says Ramona needs to lay up the shot, and LuAnn says, God help those men in there.

Next time, Dorinda says, only 24 hours and they got Leah to drink; Sonja says she was never a trophy wife; and LuAnn leaves Ramona’s.

👨🏽‍🍳 On Top Chef, Kelly Clarkson was introduced as guest judge. Everyone was thrilled, and she said she always gets worried about what the reaction will be when she’s a surprise. She gave the chefs a sneak peek at The Trolls World Tour, telling them the plot involves six Trolls heading musical genres, who all want to take over. The theme is inclusivity, and that everyone should be heard. She’s the voice of the head of the country Trolls. A table was set up with ingredients grouped by color, representing the six musical Troll worlds. For the Quickfire challenge, the chefs were to take an ingredient from each color, and make one cohesive dish. The winner would not only get immunity, but would also go to the red carpet premiere of the movie.

Gregory said he’d slayed the Quickfire challenges his last time around, but hadn’t gotten his momentum. Brian didn’t know what to do with the cotton candy he chose, and was eating it. When he tried to make ice cream, it exploded out of the machine. When the judges did their tasting, Padma asked if he meant for he ice cream to be curd-like, and he said that’s exactly what he was going for. No wonder his last name is Malarkey. Apparently, Gregory got his momentum, since he won for his shrimp dish. He said he was going to be taking Nini, since she’d let him use her can opener.

For the elimination challenge, the chefs would be shopping at the Santa Monica farmer’s market, where there are over 75 organic farmers selling produce. They would be split into two teams of six, and make a six-course progressive menu, each being responsible for one course, including dessert. They were being given $1200 and 45 minutes to shop, but wouldn’t know what they’d have to work with until they got to the market. Their entire menu also had to be vegetarian, and they’d be serving 40 diners at Jeremy Fox’s restaurant Birdie Gs. They were reminded that Jeremy literally wrote the book on vegetables.

A basket of trolls, courtesy of Kelly, waited for them at the house. Melissa thought it would be a challenge to be flexible, and that communication and being able to pivot were key. The market was very impressive, and while the chefs didn’t seem to have a hard time deciding what to make, there were a few monkey wrenches along the way, like Jennifer burning her cashew butter, and Lisa discovering her Brussels sprouts were inconsistently cooked.

Padma said the blue team was clearly the winner with progression, and Tom thought everything was solid all the way through. The plating was beautiful, and the menu well-executed. Melissa was the winner within the winners, and said in her interview that she was there to show she was a force to be reckoned with. The red team didn’t fare so well, the judges finding the first two courses being too raw. Brian’s mozzarella and tomato dish was something they’d felt had been seen before, and he and Leeann played the blame game over Lee Anne’s dish, as Brian had helped plate it. Lisa’s Brussels sprouts weren’t well-received either, but she tried to justify them by saying her cooking was more rustic. Tom said she could still be true to herself, yet be thoughtful and complex. He said it all depended on how far they were willing to push themselves, and they didn’t want to walk out second guessing what they’d done. In the end, Lisa packed her knives and went to Last Chance Kitchen. She said it sucked, since she had made the finale in her season, and it was something she hadn’t heard before. This was a whole other level of chefs, and hadn’t been easy.

Next time, the chefs’ loved ones join them, and they’re going to be responsible for creating their own product, which their guests will test. It also looks like an ambulance has to be called for Lee Anne’s mom.

🌈 Connecting…

Hope all is well, and you’re being productive. Or at least catching up on your TV watching. Stay safe, and see you on Sunset tomorrow.

Apr9

April 8, 2020 – Nelle Wants a Magic Makeover, Figuring It Out, Early SUR Drama, Calling the Kettle Fake, Amigas Move On, Alone At Last & Be Happy

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Josslyn shows up at Jason’s place, and he asks how she got there. She says Tony drove her. She told him if he didn’t, she’d get a Ride Share. Jason says it’s not fair putting the guards in that position, but Josslyn says, it’s important. Nelle is suing GH, Monica, and Bobbie for malpractice. He needs to stop her.

Nina asks if Nelle wasn’t over the line just now with Willow. Nelle asks if Nina is going to fire her for being direct, but Nina tells her, she didn’t say that. She knows firsthand what it’s like to know a child as your own, and lose that child. Nelle says what Sasha did to Nina was terrible. Now Willow is teaming up with the Corinthoses and Quartermaines to take Wiley from her. Why should she try to be civil? Nina gets it. Willow told her about the procedure Wiley is going to need in a few months. She understands Nelle’s concerns; Wiley is small for such a big procedure, but it’s truly about the best interest of the child. Prove the naysayers wrong. Nelle asks, how? and Nina says, show everyone that she’s a good mother, and allow Wiley to have the procedure. We flash back to Nelle and Carly on the hospital roof, and Carly saying Nelle is on the verge of overplaying her hand. What if things go wrong, and she’s left empty-handed? It’s her chance to win people over to her side; her turnaround moment. Take it. Nelle doesn’t sign, and Carly locks her on the roof.

Willow joins Sasha and Michael in Sonny’s kitchen. She says they’ll never guess where she bumped into Nelle. At Crimson; she’s working there. Michael says his mom told him, and Willow asks if it doesn’t bother him that Nelle is going to look like a presentable, responsible parent with job. Nelle’s plan is to force him to share custody, and that’s what she’s doing. We flash back to Sasha saying Michael should marry Willow, and that Willow has always acted as Wiley’s mother. Why stop now?

Nina says if Nelle complies with her consent to allow Wiley to undergo the procedure, it’s sure to open up Michael to sharing custody. Everyone wins. Nelle says, it’s not enough. She wants what’s best for Wiley, but Carly isn’t going to get him. Nina says it’s her chance to prove to everyone she’s a good mother, including Wiley. Carly walks in, and says, sorry to interrupt, but she’d like a word with Nelle. Nina says, it’s not a good time, and Nelle says Carly can’t barge into her workplace like that. Carly says, it’s important. It directly affects her grandson’s health. Nina tells Carly to suit herself, and leaves. Nelle says, how dare Carly disrupt things at her workplace? She’s going to tell the court about it. Carly says she thinks Nelle will be interested in what she has to say. She’s about to give Nelle everything she’s wanted.

Chase goes to Sonny’s, and asks if it’s a strategy session on Wiley’s custody. Michael says, it’s more like a meeting of interested parties, and Sasha says they’re not making much progress. Chase says he has more bad news. Nelle is suing the hospital for malpractice, and Willow says they know. He asks if they know he’s also being deposed as a witness.

Jax sees Nina in Crimson’s reception area, and asks if she’s filling in for Nelle during her break. She guesses he could say that. Carly appropriated her office to harass Nelle. He says, Nelle deserves what she gets, but Nina says, it’s not helping. Jax says, them having to deal with Nelle is entirely his fault. We flash back to Jax admitting he’s the one who bought Josslyn’s kidney.

Carly says, Nelle wins. Nelle beat her. Carly is so used to being on top, she forget what it’s like to be outside looking in, but Nelle never lost her edge or let her down guard. She underestimated Nelle, and for that she’s truly sorry. Nelle says, that’s it? She’s sorry? After all the ways Carly hurt her, a stupid apology is going to fix it? Carly says, tell her how to fix it. How does she make amends? Tell her, and she’ll do it. Nelle tells Carly to start admitting she’s just like her.

In a memory, Eden McCoy (Josslyn) is young Carly, and Cynthia Watros (Nina with brown hair) is her mother, Virginia. Carly walks into thier apartment in Jacksonville, Florida. Virginia asks how the interview was. Carly says she was offered the job, and Virginia says she’s happy for her. It’s a nice place, and when she gets experience, she can transfer to the PT department at Jacksonville Memorial. Carly says she turned them down. She said thanks, but no thanks. She’s not staying in Jacksonville. It’s not the life she wants.

Josslyn tells Jason, Nelle tried to kill Michael, and should be in prison. She gave Wiley to Brad, and hid him from Michael, and now she wants to be his mom. Jason says, the legal system… and Josslyn says, that’s why she’s here. Jason doesn’t care about the law. He has to be the one to fix this. He asks what she wants him to do. We flash back to Nelle and Josslyn on the pier. Nelle says her baby is dead, and Josslyn believes Carly’s lies. Apparently, she’s one of Carly’s minions. Josslyn says she’s calling the police, and Nelle says, Josslyn would do that to her after what they’ve been to each other? They’re sisters. Josslyn says, Avery is her sister, and Kristina is her sister, but Nelle is a lying piece of trash who tried to sabotage her family. Nelle says she tried to open Josslyn’s eyes to Carly, but Josslyn is just like her. Josslyn says, damn right. You messed with the wrong family, bitch. Nelle says Josslyn might not be alive if it wasn’t for her. Josslyn owes her. Josslyn says, all she owes Nelle is a call to the cops. Nelle throws Josslyn’s phone, and they tussle. Nelle says, after all she’s done, Josslyn is going to regret this. Josslyn clocks Nelle. In the present, Jason tells Josslyn, he promises Nelle won’t get Wiley. He gives her his word.

Chase says he was present when Nelle learned Wiley had the procedure, and found out the consent form was missing. That makes him a material witness. Michael is sorry Chase got dragged into it, and Willow can’t believe Nelle’s vindictiveness. Michael says it’s not about Wiley or Nelle, but about his mother and Nelle trying to hurt her. We flash back to Carly saying she trusted Nelle, and every time she sang Nelle’s praises, Nelle was tightening the screws on Sonny. Drugging him, planting her bra in his bed. She can’t believe how completely wrong she got Nelle. She fell for Nelle’s angel act. She’s either one hell of a blackmailer or crazy. Back at Sonny’s, Chase tells Michael, the problem is, once again the law is on Nelle’s side.

Nelle tells Carly, let’s hear it. If she’s trash and a gold-digging psycho, so is Carly. Carly came to Port Charles to take down her mother, and got knocked up, using Michael as a bargaining chip. Michael gave Carly leverage, and was Carly’s golden ticket. Wiley is hers. Carly says, if it’s money Nelle wants, she’ll pay it, but Nelle says Carly isn’t hearing her. She wants the magic makeover Carly got. She wants everything she’s done flipped on it’s head. Carly seduced Bobbie’s husband, and it became Tony’s fault. She doesn’t want to face any consequences. She wants to be the heroine. We flash back to the first time Nelle showed up at Sonny’s house. Michael answers the door, and she says she’s there to see Carly. He says his mom is busy with a family party, and introduces himself. Michael tells Carly that Nelle is there to interview for the nanny position, but Nelle says she’s not. She saw the article in Crimson about Josslyn’s kidney transplant, and thinks she’s the donor. Carly thanks her, and says she appreciates what Nelle has been through, but before they proceed, she needs to find out if Nelle is really the donor. Is she willing to prove it? They can run some tests, and Carly will cover the expenses. Nelle says Carly thinks she’s lying. We move on to Carly saying she has the perfect job for Nelle, as her personal assistant. She’ll be working at the hotel, and learn a lot about the business, and she’ll also run personal errands for Carly. Nelle says she appreciates Carly trying to help, and Carly says, it’s not a made up job; she knows that’s what Nelle is thinking. Nelle says she has no experience, but Carly says, the job requires no formal training or education. She’ll be learning everything on the job. Then we see Nelle thanking Carly for the advance, and saying she’ll be ready to start soon. She knows she keeps saying it, but thank you. Carly says, Nelle knows she keeps saying it, but right back at her. They hug. At the Crimson office, Carly says, if that’s what Nelle wants, she’s going about it all wrong.

Virginia says, Carly is leaving Jacksonville? Where is she going? Carly says she doesn’t know yet, and Virginia says, it’s just a fantasy. Carly says, it’s very much real. She’s been thinking about this for a long time, and halfway through the interview, she knew. Virginia asks if he did something inappropriate, but Carly says, she said everyone there was family, and had been there ten to fifteen years. She can’t be someone who never moves, has the same job forever, and marries a good provider. Or worse, a loser who leaves. Virginia says, Carly doesn’t want to be her. Carly says, they’re different people who want different things. She wants to live in a big house, and wear designer clothes, and have more money than she can spend. She wants to travel. There are amazing people out there, doing amazing things, and she wants to be one of them. Virginia says she’s living a pipe dream.

Josslyn tells Jason that she doesn’t care if it makes her a bad person. She can live with it, as long as Nelle doesn’t have a chance to get Wiley. Jason promises her that Nelle won’t, but it’s too soon. She says if he waits until after the custody hearing, it will look suspicious. He asks if she thinks Nelle’s attorney is better than Diane, but she says, no. He asks if she thinks Michael isn’t as good as Nelle, and she says she doesn’t, but face it, Nelle gets away with everything. We flash back to Carly introducing Nelle to Josslyn at the hospital, and telling Josslyn that Nelle is her kidney donor. Josslyn says Nelle gave her the best gift, and they hug. We move to Nelle seeing Josslyn outside Kelly’s, and Josslyn telling her about Oscar. Josslyn says he asked her to go out, and Nelle asks what Josslyn told him, but Josslyn says she didn’t get a chance. When Nelle showed up, Oscar left. Nelle asks what Josslyn’s answer is, but Josslyn doesn’t know. Nelle asks if she doesn’t know the answer, or does, and doesn’t want to hurt him.

Chase says if Nelle’s signature was forged like she says, and Monica and Bobbie covered it up, Nelle has a cause of action. Willow says, there’s been no real harm done to Wiley; she’s just targeting Michael’s grandmothers, hoping Michael will back off, and hand Wiley over, so she’ll leave them alone. Michael says, Nelle is trying to maximize the damage, and pay back his grandmothers for rejecting her. We flash back to Bobbie catching Nelle stealing at the MetroCourt; Monica saying Nelle and Michael should get along in the best interest of the child; and Monica telling Nelle that no one has to prove a damn thing. They’ve proven it by being there, and she has colleagues who will back up her diagnosis of Wiley. Michael says, Bobbie couldn’t stand Nelle. At first, Monica was like him, and believed Nelle, but when she turned, she turned hard. Willow says, who cares why Nelle does what she does? They have to figure out how to keep Wiley safe from her.

Jax tells Nina, all Carly knew about Frank was that he’d walked out on her and her adoptive mother early on. Then one day, she got a letter; a long tale about Frank needing money. Carly threw it away, but another one came. Carly marked return to sender on it, but the letters kept coming. One came while they were waiting for Josslyn to get a kidney, and he opened it. It was a letter from a man desperate to do anything for money. He reached out to Frank, and offered him a million dollars. A few days later, Josslyn had a kidney. We flash back to Carly saying she knows Jax isn’t capable of paying a man to harvest his child’s organs, and Jax explaining what he did. He was desperate, but didn’t know Frank would take a kidney from his own daughter. Carly says, now it makes sense why Jax wanted her to drop the search. He knew where the kidney came from, and put it together when Nelle showed up. She’d assumed he talked to the parents, but she didn’t know Frank was Nelle’s father. Why didn’t he tell her that he paid Frank? He says he didn’t know Frank would use his own daughter, and Sonny says, Jax thought Frank was going to use a nameless, faceless person? Jax says he doesn’t regret what he did, and Carly says, Sonny would do the same thing for his child. Sonny says, he doesn’t have a problem with that. What he has a problem with, is what came after. We move to Jax explaining to Josslyn that did something illegal. He reached out to Nelle’s father, and offered him money to find a donor. It’s his fault Nelle came to town and wants revenge. If he’d been honest, it wouldn’t have happened. Josslyn says, it’s because of him she’s alive, and hugs him. Next, we see Michael asking how Jax pulled it off, and Jax saying, Nelle refused to say anything that would indict him.

Carly says if Nelle wants people to care, she has to give them a reason. Show who she really is, even if she’s afraid she’ll never be good enough. Nelle asks if Carly is a motivational speaker, and Carly says she’s the voice of experience. She wanted her mother to love her, and told herself that when Bobbie saw her, she would recognize her. But that didn’t happen. Bobbie treated her like the stranger she was. Bobbie didn’t mean to reject her, but that’s how she felt. She decided to take everything from Bobbie, and live Bobbie’s life better than Bobbie. Sound familiar? It’s what Nelle is trying to do to her. We flash back to Carly telling Sonny, no good deed goes unpunished. Sonny says, Nelle was working all of them. He asks Nelle, what was her goal? Michael says he’d like to know himself, and Nelle says they could start by asking her real last name. It’s Benson. It’s Carly’s last name too, but they have more in common than a last name. Carly is Frank’s daughter. In the present, Carly says, it was almost the same reason Bobbie was supposed to recognize her. Nelle asks, why didn’t she?

Virginia says, Frank left before Carly was four years old, but he was always making shortcuts and deals, waiting for a big payoff. She never minded because she had a good job, and Carly, but then Frank couldn’t deal with failure, and ran away. Carly asks if Virginia is saying she’ll fail, but Virginia tells her, she’s saying Carly is making the wrong choices. Going to Paris and Reno won’t make her happy. Carly says she’ll let Virginia know when she sees them. Virginia says, before she goes off to make her life better, she needs to figure out what is better. Carly says, maybe Frank is rich now. Virginia doubts it, and Carly says, even if he’s just ordinary, he owes her a lifetime of back child support. Virginia says, assuming he has it, which is highly unlikely, she’ll have to find him first. Carly says she knows Frank’s friend, Mr. Richardson, but Virginia says he won’t be able to tell her anything. Carly says, it can’t hurt to ask.

Willow says she’s sorry; that was uncalled for. Sasha says Willow is just saying what they’re all thinking. Michael says if he had a magic wand, or there was on specific action he knew would work, he’d take it in a heartbeat, but that’s not how it works. Willow can’t believe how little Nelle cares for her own son. We flash back to Jason telling Michael that they have to make a plan, and Michael saying he can do what Nelle can’t; play by the rules. He can afford the best lawyers, and Nelle was just arrested for assault and violated her parole. But in the meantime, she can request supervised visits. Jason says they can’t plan on things going right, and have to figure out what to do if they go wrong. All they know, is Nelle gave Wiley to Brad, and if she gets a sympathetic jury and walks, what does he think will happen? In Sonny’s kitchen, Willow says she’s not doing any good there, and she has to get back to the hospital. She jets, and Chase says he’ll go with her, but Sasha says, let her. Sometimes it’s easier to talk to a girl. Chase asks Michael if he’s worried about Willow. He sure as hell is.

Jason tells Josslyn, Nelle’s power lies in her getting people to believe what she wants them to. She got Michael to believe she loved him, and Josslyn to believe she was a friend. She got Brad to believe he could steal Wiley to make Lucas happy. Nelle didn’t make Brad take the baby; it was his choice. He had the power to step up and do the right thing. Nelle wasn’t in charge of him, and she’s not in charge of the custody hearing. She’ll try to get the judge to believe her story, but odds are, they won’t. The facts are on Michael’s side. We flash back to Josslyn telling Michael, Wiley is lucky to have him as a dad, but it’s unfair how much time Wiley was separated from him. Michael tells her they can’t be angry or sad about what happened, and Josslyn asks if he thinks they survived the shooting to lead them to this. Michael says he doesn’t know, but he realized you have to take life in both hands, and not let go.

Jax tells Nina, he had no idea Frank was going to use his own daughter. He didn’t want to know anything. He just wanted his daughter to live, and committed a morally reprehensible act that he should have paid for. Instead, Carly and Michael did, and Nelle didn’t. It seems like Wiley will pay now. We flash back to Carly seeing Jax after Sonny had him detained. Jax says he cut a deal, and has to leave the country never to return. At Crimson, he tells Nina that he’s questioned himself a million times, mostly in the middle of the night when he can’t sleep, or when he’s watching Josslyn live her life; his beautiful, healthy daughter. All he knows is, he hates what he did, but he can’t regret the outcome. Nina says, he compromised himself to save his daughter. No doubt she’d do the same thing if she had a daughter to save.

Nelle says, Carly should have known her, and welcomed her sister. Carly says, they’re not… related. Nelle says Carly can’t even say the word. Sisters. No matter how much Carly wishes it wasn’t true, they have the same father – Frank. Carly says, Frank isn’t her father. He married her adoptive mother, and ghosted them before she even knew him. She only met him once. She tracked him down in Miami, trying to get a fraction of the child support he owed her. Nelle says Frank wasn’t Carly’s father until she needed money. Carly says she didn’t get a dime, and didn’t know Nelle was Josslyn’s kidney donor. She didn’t even remember Frank had a daughter. Nelle says, that’s a lie. Carly knew. She was there.

Tomorrow, Willow says, it’s not enough, and she has to do something; Jason says, without Nelle, there’s no Wiley; and Nelle says Frank had asked Carly to stay with them.

🐎 Digging Deeper…

Figuring out the riddle that is Westworld

https://www.gamespot.com/gallery/westworld-season-3-14-clues-you-may-have-missed-in/2900-3445/?ftag=NLS-04-10aaa1d

🍸 Digging For Dirt…

This is old news, but something I hadn’t heard about, and this page has a lot of fun VPR discussion.

https://www.reddit.com/r/vanderpumprules/comments/eljx61/new_cast_member_arrested_at_vpr_premiere_party/

Apparently, they don’t know how to use Google though.

https://pagesix.com/2020/01/08/new-vanderpump-rules-cast-member-causes-ruckus-at-premiere-after-party/

💃🏾 You Twirl, Girl…

I haven’t really been keeping up on this show, but I always enjoy a Kenya story. I know it’s been years, but I still can’t get over that Portia thought the Underground Railroad was an actual railroad.

https://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/porsha-williams-reacts-kenya-moore-fake-comments?cid=soc_tw_Bravo_Dish

🍊 The Thirst Thickens…

That didn’t take long. Fortunately Unfortunately, they can’t move ahead with anything further than an idea right now.

https://hollywoodlife.com/2020/04/04/tamra-judge-new-show-vicki-gunvalson-returning-rhoc/

🐼 Panda Love…

Because people finally stopped staring at them every time they tried to do it.

https://www.mic.com/p/after-10-years-without-sex-two-giant-pandas-finally-got-it-on-in-empty-zoo-in-hong-kong-22767457

🛣 Staying the Course…

Every time I hear a politician say that, I hear Dana Carvey imitating George Bush. Well, if nothing else, now would be the perfect time to make that Pinterest fail lamb cake I’ve been dreaming about. Stay safe, socially distant, and try not to think of pink elephants. (Caught you already.)