What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Chase lounges in a floatie donut in the pool. Dante comes by and says, this reminds him of a movie he saw once. Disillusioned guy spends the summer floating around in a pool so he can avoid his future. Chase says, The Graduate. It’s a good movie. The key difference is though, the main character had Simon and Garfunkel singing his confusion. Dante says, right, and Chase says, and didn’t have to pay for his pool chaise. Dante says, that’s true too. Don’t kid himself though. That guy was a lot younger than him. Chase says, thank you. Did Dante talk to his guy at the CCRB? Dante says, yeah, and Chase says, and? Is there a chance he’s getting back on the force? Dante says he’s sorry. He wishes he had better news to report.

Lucy comes into the Deception office, and tells Brook and Maxie that she’s sorry to keep them waiting. She was on the phone with Paris again and again, and she appreciates them coming to this meeting at such short notice. Maxie says she’s supposed to meet Britt for brunch, but if this is about what she thinks it’s about, Britt will forgive her. Lucy says, yeah, Sasha, and Brook says, it’s all over the news. It’s blowing up their social media. They need to release a statement. Lucy says, exactly, and Maxie says, one that protects Sasha’s privacy. Lucy says, that is a given, but they also have to consider Deception’s image and protect their company. Maxie says, more important, they help their friend, but Lucy says she’s not sure they can do both.

Martin gives Sasha some coffee, and says, it’s not Perks, but why doesn’t she try to drink it anyway; be as sharp as she can. She just stares ahead, and he says, Sasha? If she doesn’t have anything more to say, he guesses he’ll see what time transport is set for her arraignment. Outside in the squad room, Gladys arrives, and Brando hugs her. She says she brought Sasha fresh clothes. He looks like he hasn’t slept a wink. Where’s Sasha? He points to the interrogation room, and says, she’s int there conferring with her lawyer Martin Grey. She says, excellent. He’s Valentin Cassadine’s attorney; he’s high-powered. He’ll help their girl for sure. Martin comes out, and Brando asks, how’s Sasha? Martin says, she’s just great. Why shouldn’t she be? She’s only facing charges of reckless endangerment, disturbing the peace, willful destruction of property – both public and private – and oh yeah, attempted murder.

Gregory meets Alexis at some outside tables, and she says, he’s early. He says, only by a few minutes. He’s eager to hear the feedback on the op ed he wrote. She says, and so he shall. She promised to be honest. He tells her not to keep him in suspense. Who came out on top of their little wager? She says, you tell me, and hands him her tablet.

At the MetroCourt Gardens, Sam thanks Spinelli for meeting her. He says, of course (🍷). He’s always at her service. Cody walks in, and Spinelli says, unlike others, she’s entirely worthy of his time and efforts.

Cody sees Britt, and says, hello again. He sits next to her, and she says, and goodbye again, getting up. He says, come on. Don’t be like that. She doesn’t have to take off. She says, sorry. She has to go. He says, what? She needs something plugged in again? She needs to wash her hair? He knows she doesn’t need to see a guy about a horse because he’s that guy. She says, he’s right. She doesn’t need to make excuses. The simple truth is, she just doesn’t like him.

Chase says, so the Review Board is going to rule against him? and Dante says he doesn’t know about that. All he knows is, his guy on the inside, when he asked if Chase would get his badge back, he said the chances were slim. Chase asks if there’s anything he can do to derail this, and Dante says, the new member appointed by the public advocate is making a point of throwing the book at cops who step out of line, regardless of their exemplary record. Chase says, so that’s it, he’s no longer a cop, but Dante says, take it from him, you’re still a cop until you actually hand your badge in for good. There’s always hope until that happens. Chase says, hope doesn’t pay his late rent, and Dante says he’ll spot Chase rent money. Chase says he appreciates that, but he got himself into this, and he’ll get himself out. Dante says, even if it means taking a job outside the force? when Linc appears, and says, then it’s a good thing Chase has other options.

Brook scrolls on her tablet, and says, the comments are so rude. Poor Sasha. Maxie says, she kept insisting she was okay, but in retrospect, it’s clear she wasn’t. Lucy says, these media hounds are baying for blood. They’ve got to simply reset the narrative. They need to engender empathy for Sasha that maintains her position here, and hopefully placates the Board of Directors. Maxie says, they need to come up with a strategy that shields Deception from liability, while not abandoning one of their partners. Brook says, right. Where do they start? Maxie says, let’s get the ball rolling, and asks if Brook would mind taking notes. Brook says, of course (🍷) not, and Maxie says, Deception’s press release subject: Deception’s commitment on supporting health and mental well-being.

Gladys brings a garment bag in to Sasha, and asks how she’s holding up.

Alexis tells Gregory, this one says, Professor Chase’s opinion piece seems like a complaint in search of a cause, and he says, but if you scroll up, you’ll see Cronkite’s Ghost – he laughs – says his op-ed piece eloquently illuminates the necessity of objectivity. She laughs, and says, Cronkite’s Ghost. They say a handle says a lot about a person. She’s getting pompous blowhard. He asks if she’s ascribing that characterization to him, but she says, no, of course (🍷) not. Here’s one. Newshound86 thinks his op-ed piece is a dumpster fire. He says, how constructive… and poetic, and she says, this one just wants her to put the horoscopes back in. He says, he’d argue that astrology is subjective, so he marks that one in his favor. She says, by a slim margin, it appears the readers approve of his point-of-view. Cue the gloating. He says, him gloat? No. It’s enough he’s feeling validated that his so-called antiquated notions have merit. Thanks for following up. She says, a deal’s a deal, and he says, speaking of which, their deal was, if he won, she’d take more of his input on board. She wonders why the hairs on the back of her neck on end. Cue the smirk. He smiles.

Cody says, Britt hasn’t been shy about her disapproval, and she says, and yet, here he is. Haven’t they played this scene before? He says, yes, we have, but we keep screwing up the finale, and she asks what he means by we. He says, he can admit that he doesn’t always say the right things, and she asks if he expects her to say something to the contrary, but he says, no. He was just giving her the chance to admit that she’s unforgiving when it comes to human frailty. He takes a sip of his drink, and says he’ll wait. She says, by all means, help yourself.

Sam tells Spinelli that she thinks she hit a brick wall, but he’s busy staring at Britt and Cody. She says, then Felicia made a great suggestion to her. She said, think analog. He says, interesting, and she says, the documentation she needs is abroad. Is he available for a quick trip? He asks, where? and she says she was thinking Mars. She hears the planet is notorious for sloppy record keeping. He says, that’s just common knowledge, and she says, he’s not even listening to a word she’s saying, but he says, he is. Analog records… messy… Mars? She tells him, she said Mars, and the word she used is sloppy. What’s messy is him eavesdropping on Britt and Cody’s conversation. She wants him to tell her why, and no lame excuse or denial, because she’s not buying it.

Sasha comes out, and Brando her. He says he’s not going anywhere, and Gladys leads her away. Martin says he’s glad Brando’s mother brought fresh clothes; she needs to be as presentable as possible. Brando says, clothes aren’t going to do anything. Her eyes are vacant and she doesn’t look good. They need to get her out of here. Tell him, how are they going to beat these charges? Martin says, they can’t.

Cody tells Britt to look at it from his point-of-view. She tore into him about falling into the pool at the mixer. He was hired to jump, and she was standing smackdab in the middle of it. She helped him in the alley when he got beat up, but then she assumed he deserved it. He did not. Then she drenched him on their date because he went a little overboard trying to impress her. And she woudn’t even accept his apology. Then when she finally did accept his apology, she found some trivial reason to get angry at him again. It’s like she wants him to fail. He guesses if people don’t live up to her ridiculously high expectations she’s set for them, she gets to feel justified punishing them. She says, he’s right. He’s got her number. He says, he does?

Sam says, Spinelli is on good terms with Britt, so his beef must be with Cody. Why? He says, Mr. Bell is a scoundrel of ill-repute, and she asks if he realizes Cody and Dante are best friends from childhood. Leo loves the guy, as do the horses. He seems like a nice guy. What’s Spinelli’s issue with him? Spinelli says, he’s a man of many faces, and she says, meaning? He says he can read people well. Remember, he never liked Peter August. She says, nobody liked Peter August. Why doesn’t he save his incredible reading skills for the documentation they’ll be hunting down on their trip? She’d like to leave by the end of the week. He says he’s completely at her disposal stateside, but he’s too occupied with work to cross the International Dateline. She says, work. She’s so glad he brought that up. What is it he does these days?

Dante says he wasn’t talking to Linc. What does he want? Linc says, nothing to do with Dante. He has business with Dante’s friend here. Dante says, Chase is still a cop, so Chase is his partner, and Chase asks Dante to give them a second. Dante asks if Chase is kidding. This guy might be the reason he gets kicked off the force. What business could Chase possibly have with him? Linc says, standing right here, and Dante says, go stand over there. Chase tells Dante, he knows what he’s doing, and Dante says, all right. Just don’t let this punk bait him. He leaves, and Linc says, Chase gave him 30 days to show him what he can do. It hasn’t even been a week, and he’s booked Chase a gig at The Savoy. What has Brook done for him lately?

Maxie asks Brook to read that last part back, and Brook reads, together we pledge to stand up for the Deception family by breaking the stigma of mental health challenges, ensuring their partners and their families receive all the help they need. Therefore, Deception will make a one million dollar donation to help families with mental illness. Maxie says, sounds good. Just change the Deception family to our Deception family, and she thinks that’s their press release. Brook agrees, and says, Sasha’s arrest was definitely a cry for help. Hopefully, framing it this way will inspire compassion. Haters be damned. She’s going to make this change, email it to herself, and take it to PR. Maxie asks her to have legal put their eyes on it first. Then tell them to work with PR. She wants it posted on all their social media platforms as soon as possible. Brook says, she’ll make it happen, and leaves. Maxie asks if Lucy didn’t have anything she wanted to add, but Lucy says, no. Actually, everything Maxie and Brook said is fine. Lucy scarfs gummi bears as they talk, and Maxie says, she’s glad Martin is representing Sasha; he’s one of the best. And she’s not just saying that because… you know. Lucy says, my guy knows his stuff, and it’s good for Sasha’s sake, and for ours. Maxie says, ours? and Lucy says, it’s just that Martin sees the big picture, and understands how important it is to protect all of Sasha’s interests, which includes Deception. Which means they have some tough decisions to make. Maxie says, how tough? and Lucy says, Maxie’s not going to like what she has to say.

Martin tells Brando, he had a call into the DA’s office, and his contact just got back to him. Martin wanted to run something by him. Brando says, something about Sasha? and Martin says, Brando’s got to understand some things. Brando says, sounds serious, and Martin says, in the first place, he’s sorry he rattled off those charges at Brando like that. He wasn’t trying to be flippant. He’s a little punchy in the morning when he hasn’t slept, but he swears he’s taking this case seriously. He wants Brando to know, he’s looking at every possibility to help his wife; all of them. Brando thanks him, and asks if Martin was being punchy when he said they couldn’t beat some of these charges. Martin says, some of the charges he believe can be thrown out, or restitution can be made, but on some of the others, no way. They have to contend with a very damning video; a video where Sasha isn’t just out of control, she looks outright violent. All those assault charges are going to be tough to beat. Brando says, but he’ll try, right? They’ll do whatever he wants them to do. Martin says he believes Brando will, but can the same thing be said of his wife?  

Gladys wipes Sasha’s face, and Sasha pulls away. Gladys says, Sasha is still a little smudged. She’s just trying help. Sasha says, thanks, but nobody can help, and Gladys says, that’s not true. Sasha has a whole army behind her. Maxie’s been blowing up Gladys’s phone; she just hasn’t had a chance to get back to her. She’s sure Maxie and Lucy want to visit Sasha, but Sasha says she’s not. Not after what she did. Gladys asks why she did it, and Sasha says, she was standing up for herself, and she would do it again.

Gregory says, he heard Sasha Gilmore recently attacked the vehicle of one of Alexis’s reporters, and she says, Smoltz (who apparently has no first name) is a freelancer. He says, whatever Smoltz’s role at The Invader, he’s surprised there’s been no mention of it in her paper. Why is that? She says, because the story is still evolving, and they’ll cover it when they know more. Unless of course (🍷) he’d like her to report the salacious account of a spokesmodel having a nervous breakdown. He says, that’s a narrow way of looking at it, and she says, and his way? He says, the facts. A reporter – one affiliated with her paper – was attacked while doing his job.

Lucy says, maybe they should consider finding a new Face of Deception, and Maxie asks if she’s talking about pushing Sasha out, but Lucy says, no, absolutely not. Sasha is their partner, and always will be. She’s just thinking maybe Sasha should step aside as spokesperson, just for a while. Take a sabbatical or something. Maxie says, after everything Sasha has lost, Lucy wants to strip her of more, and Lucy says, it’s hard to say and hard to hear, but look at everything they’ve built; look at all this company means. All the money, everything, is tied up in its stock value. And if it goes belly-up, it’s Brokesville again; they’ll have nothing. She knows Sasha wouldn’t want that. Does Maxie? Sasha is their friend, always; this is just business. Maxie says, okay. Then as the head of this business, Lucy can tell her, and she walks out.

Gladys says, can’t the court just ask Sasha to pay for the damage to that reporter’s car? She’s good for it. Sasha says, Smoltz deserved it; so did Sienna. Pretending to be Sasha’s friend, when all along, Sienna wanted to ply her with more drugs so she could stab her in the back. She’s so sick of them. She’s tired of being exploited. Gladys says, of course (🍷) she is, but isn’t she also tired of feeling out of control?

Martin tells Brando, he doesn’t know what the hell’s going on or why, but they simply don’t have time to figure it out. For some reason, Brando’s wife has completely shut down. Every answer she gave him was model celeb, if she answered him at all. Brando says, Sasha’s in shock. Spending the night in jail didn’t help at all. Martin says, he’ll definitely ask the court to take that into consideration, but that’s not the only issue at play here, is it? He was up most of the night going over the evidence in this case, trying to wrap his head recent events, and he doesn’t have to tell Brando, it doesn’t look good. Sasha has blown up her sobriety, she’s spun out on national television… She caused a fatal car accident... Brando says, she didn’t cause that; Harmony ran out in front of her. Martin says, so what? His point is, with Sasha these days, it’s one thing after another. This is just something else in a long line of bad looks. Now, worst of all, she’s either in denial or she’s intentionally avoiding the help she so desperately needs.

Britt tells Cody, she is too hard on people; she always has been. He asks if she thinks she misses out on getting to know folks, and she says, probably. He says, it’s kind of worse that they end up missing out on knowing her, and she says, okay, this is sliding into the sappy zone. What he doesn’t understand is, she doesn’t really like people all that much, so it’s no great loss. He says he’s see how she and her buddy Brad get on, when she’s not scolding him, and she says, that weirdo? He says, besides, what’s a little sap between friends? Nothing wrong with that. Not to be presumptuous, but he has a sappy present for her. He knows they’re not friends or anything like that, but consider him a weirdo. He takes an envelope out of his pocket, and puts it on the table. He says, it’s just a little token to prove he’s not some conniving grifter, and she says, he just happened to be carrying it in case he bumped into her? Not conniving, eh? How did he know where to find her?

Spinelli assures Sam, his work is of the greatest importance. Not as important as hers of course (🍷). He has contacts all over the world who can be at her disposal. In fact, he’ll connect her with someone who can help aid in her investigation. She says, nice try. She’s not done interrogating him yet. He says, she’s an astute sleuth. Can’t she detect a dead end when she sees one? Speaking of sleuths, how are things with Detective Falconari? She says, well, he asked her to move in with him. Spinelli says, congratulations. Glad tidings… are they not?

Chase tells Linc, that’s great about The Savoy, but he’s sure Brook has some irons in the fire. Linc says, while she’s flailing around, he’s crushing it. How does a gig at The Mercury Lounge sound? Chase says, in New York City? Out of his league. That place is for the big acts. Linc says, it is, and it will be for Chase before he knows it, with Linc managing his career. It’s hard to have a serious conversation with a floatie between them. Chase gets out of the pool, and Linc hands him a towel. He says, it’s good to see Chase’s unemployment paid off with more gym time. When he’s through marketing Chase, their key demo is either going to want to be him, or want to be with him. Brook walks in, and says, Chase isn’t just a piece of meat; he’s an artist – a talented, beautiful artist. Chase gets dressed, and Brook says, he’s got talent, and smarts, and heart. Linc says, sure. He’s the total package, but he assures her, Chase’s fans will be more interested in his eyes than his IQ. His development department has put together a promotional plan for Chase. He’s also booked studio time for them to start laying down tracks with top writers and producers. After the gig at The Savoy, then they’ll focus on The Mercury Lounge. At both gigs, the concert goers will be able to stream and share his EP. They’ll be able to sell a ton of merch at The Mercury Lounge. Either way, it’s instant revenue for Chase. Chase says he could actually use the money, and Brook asks, how much is this studio time? What are they talking here? Chase says, it does sound expensive, and Linc says, you bet it is, but not for Chase; it’s part of the package. Like his styling, his wardrobe, and his voice lessons. Can Brook offer him the same? Dante watches them, and Brook says, no, but she can offer him something even better.

Britt asks if Cody is having her followed; paying people to let him know if she shows up here? He says, Maxie told him… Well, she mentioned something about brunch plans, and he took a chance. She says, it’s still invasive, and he says he hears her, but it’s still better than showing up at her hotel room or her office. He didn’t have any other options. Is she going to open it or what? She holds the envelope to her ear, and says, it’s not ticking. He says, no need. He’s blown up enough chances with her. She opens the passport and starts to read, and he says, she’s a hard woman to make arts and crafts for. He’ll totally understand if she hates it. She says she doesn’t hate it, and he says, does she think maybe they could add another stamp? Any night she’s available. She asks if there’s any way he’ll take no for an answer, and he says, statistically? Probably the same chances as her refraining from sarcasm. She says she calls the meal this time, and he says, deal.

Sam tells Spinelli, there’s so much to consider. She’s not sure about moving. She doesn’t want to uproot Scout and Danny; the penthouse is their home. He says, home is wherever she is. Doesn’t she want to live with Dante? She says she thinks things are really good the way they are. Why change it? He asks if there’s any other reason she’s hesitant to do this, when Maxie walks in, and says, hey guys. She’s having a morning. Is she interrupting if she sits? Sam says, not at all, and Spinelli says, have a seat. Britt says she never would have figured Cody for being the arts and crafts type, and Maxie says, it looks like Britt and Cody are getting along. She guesses she doesn’t have to apologize to Britt for missing their brunch. Looks like she gave true love an assist. Spinelli asks why she’s so certain Cody is right for Britt, and she says, because she trusts Society Set-Ups. And she’s spent some time with him; he’s a sweet guy. Sam says she happens to agree, but Spinelli says, they both couldn’t be more wrong, and storms out.

Alexis says, not everyone sees things through the lens of a journalism professor, and Gregory says, he’s also a citizen. It concerns him whenever freedom of the press is constrained by threats or violence. She says, she agrees, but he doesn’t know Smoltz. His tactics are less than savory, and she wouldn’t put it past him if he goaded Sasha into a reaction, hoping to provoke just what he got. So if she were him, she wouldn’t hang out the shingle of the First Amendment rights on this one. He says he’d like to invite her to one of his PCU lectures, and she says, he’s lecturing? He says, PCU wooed him out of retirement; convinced him to teach a course. He thinks she’d get a lot out of it. She says, really? She’s argued First Amendment rights in a court of law a lot more than he’s ever lectured about it in a classroom. He says, then she undoubtedly knows, the character of the victim doesn’t preclude the reporting of the crime. Mr. Smoltz may not be the kind of reporter she respects, but he was the target of violence, which makes it at least worthy of her attention, and in his learned opinion, most definitely newsworthy.

Sasha says, Gladys thinks she’s out of control? and Gladys says, doesn’t she? Lately, she’s not the Sasha that Gladys has come to know and love. Sasha says, love. Gladys didn’t even want her to marry her son. Gladys says, she didn’t. Not then. Not at the time, for a few reasons. It seemed like they were rushing, for one thing, and she didn’t like being excluded. But once she saw how much Sasha really loved Brando, and how happy she makes him, and how kind and smart she is, she’s been proud to call Sasha her daughter-in-law. And she’s done what she could to protect Sasha. She thought Sasha knew that.

Brando asks if Martin thinks he gives a damn about optics. He cares about Sasha. He cares about what Martin can do for her. Martin says, Brando needs to care about all of it. Just like he does. Sasha’s drawn the attention of the internet; she’s gone viral. Given the recent nature of political events involving their mayor, the DA’s office is doing everything to avoid the appearance of favoritism. Sasha’s a celebrity. Optics. Translation: don’t expect any kind of preferential treatment, because they’re in no position to give her a break. Brando asks what they do, and Martin says, he motivates his wife to take a more active part in her own defense. He agrees she needs help. She needs a psyche consult, but he doesn’t know if she’d be receptive to the idea. Most of all, she needs to demonstrate her commitment to intensive therapy and restitution. Brando says he doesn’t know if Sasha is ready to confront this, and Martin says, and that severely limits their options. He can only think of one other way to keep Brando’s wife out of prison.

Britt tells Cody, it’s official; she’s been stood up. She’s going to the pool. He says, he’d ask to join her, but she’d just say he’s pushing it, and she says, maybe he is getting to know her. Maxie and Sam join them, and Maxie says, they are getting along. Britt asks for a word with her, and they step aside. Britt asks, what happened to brunch; did Maxie forget? Maxie says, she got hung up at Deception, damage control, and Britt says, right. Sorry. How’s Sasha doing? Any word? Maxie says, nothing from her side; not happy things from theirs. Britt says, when she sees Sasha, tell her she has friends, and Maxie says, she will. It seems like Britt is all about friends these days. Looking pretty cozy over there. She asks, what’s that? indicating the envelope in Britt’s hand, and Britt says, just a silly gift Cody made her. Maxie says, oh… really, and Britt says she’ll overlook whatever part Maxie played in securing him a second date. Maxie gets excited, and says, they’re going on a second date? Britt says, calm down. It’s just a date. Don’t go pricing wedding venues.

Alexis tells Gregory, what Sasha did to Smoltz is news, regardless of extenuating circumstances, but is it newsworthy? He says, that sounds like leftover lawyer speak, and she says, it’s human speak, because she’s a human being. You know who else is a human being? Sasha Gilmore. Gregory says, one that she knows personally. Could that be precluding her view? She says, she barely knows Sasha. She’s looking at the big picture, and given the impact of social media, and various platforms, in contemporary journalism, that’s something that has to be taken very seriously. He says, by all means, put the truth out there, and she says, Cronkite said, in seeking the truth, you need to be able to look at both sides of the story. If they just tell the facts of what happened to Sasha, it’s a disservice to her and their readers. He says, don’t tell him she has alternative facts, and she says, she has context. In the span of a year, Sasha has overdosed, she’s gotten clean, she’s fallen in love, she’s lost a child, she’s been in a fatal car crash, she’s relapsed, and she’s still struggling with her mental health. So if they omit all that, and just print she attacked a car with a valet sign, that’s not showing respect to the Fourth Estate. It’s character assassination disguised as journalism.

Martin says he knows he can cut a deal with the DA’s office, predicated on the promise that Sasha stays out of trouble moving forward, but Brando says he doesn’t know if they can guarantee that. Martin says, in her current state? Brando had better guarantee it, because if he makes a deal, and she breaks her promise, she will be remanded to prison. Like he said, there might be one other way, if Brando’s prepared for it. Brando asks if it’s something that would get the DA to accept this deal, and Martin asks if he knows what guardianship is. Brando says, it’s like a conservatorship, right? and Martin says, exactly. In New York state, the guardianship is utilized when an adult is considered legally incapacitated. Brando says, Martin wants them to claim Sasha is incapable of taking care of herself? and Martin asks, what happened during her last therapy appointment? Brando says, she didn’t make it, and Martin asks if Brando would say her condition makes her less able to manage things, like her health and financial affairs. Brando says he doesn’t know about this, and Martin says, take it easy. They’re not talking about tossing Sasha into some 19^th century house of hysteria; this is simply a strategy. It’s a way to keep her at home, and out of prison. Appoint someone, a guardian to watch out for her well-being, make sure she gets to appointments on time, safeguard her finances. It doesn’t have to be forever. Brando says, it seems extreme, and Martin says, it’s Brando’s call, but given Sasha’s state of mind, is she ready for a trial? He doesn’t think it would go well for her. Does Brando?

Sasha says she’s tired, and Gladys says she knows, but they’re all doing their best to help her. She can’t read Sasha’s mind, but she’ll tell Sasha what’s on hers. Sasha is her family now, and that means Gladys will do whatever it takes to look out for her.

Brook says, what she can offer Chase is unique, and Linc says, what is  this, a double-standard? Brook tells him, get his head out of the gutter, if it’s at all possible. Linc is only looking at Chase as a performer. She’s a songwriter and they’ve collaborated before. If they share songwriting credit, he’ll get a larger share of all songs produced and streamed. The money won’t be instant, but the residuals mean a lot more in the long run. Chase says, it’s very tempting, and she tells him, think about it, and leaves. She walks over to Dante, and he says he’d clap for her, but he doesn’t want to blow her cover. That was a great show. Is there anything she can’t do? She says she can’t understand what he’s saying right now. Why is he smiling? He says, it’s him. They go way back. The whole wanting to be Chase’s manager is a good angle, but he knows a con when he sees one.

Gregory tells Alexis, beautifully expressed. Miss Gilmore is lucky that Alexis is Editor-in-Chief. She says, he’s agreeing with her? and he asks if that’s so hard to believe. She says, given their interaction thus far? and he says, fair enough. He agrees this story can’t be told without including Miss Gilmore’s state of mind as a mitigating factor. It’s wise to take a more nuanced approach. Alexis says, she’s concerned about violating medical confidentiality. How does she inject nuance without compromising privacy? He says, it’s tricky, but there are ways, and she says, okay, professor. He’s offered a lesson. Okeydoke. She takes out her notebook, and says, school’s in session. He says he’s honored, but she says, don’t be. She’s doing it for Sasha.

Brando says, Martin is sure no plea deal can be made? and Martin says, not if Sasha doesn’t demonstrate some kind of cooperation. Brando asks if she wouldn’t have to agree to a guardianship, but Martin says, not necessarily, especially if she was incapable of making that decision. Brando says, she’s already accused him of trying to control her life. He doesn’t know if he’s comfortable with this. Gladys and Sasha join them, and Gladys says, comfortable with what? Are they talking a game plan, a strategy? Martin says, they have a couple options to consider, but for now they’re taking it one step at a time. He tells Sasha, this officer is going to escort her to the courthouse where she’s going to be arraigned. They’ll meet her there. Does she have any questions? Sasha shakes her head, and Brando takes her hands, and says, everything’s going to be okay. She says, promise? and he says, better than that, a vow. For better or worse, in sickness and in health. He’s got her.   

Maxie goes back to Cody and Sam, and says, Cody’s gift was a hit. Congrats. They high-five, and Cody thanks her for encouraging him to give it to Britt personally. Sam says, smooth move, Maxie, and he says, too bad all of Britt’s friends aren’t as supportive as they are. Sam says, if he’s referring to Spinelli, don’t worry about him; he’s been all over the place lately. Maxie says, she’s noticed that. What’s with him? Sam says she doesn’t know, aside from the fact he gave Cody a dirty look the entire time she was talking to him, and Maxie wonders why he’d be doing that. Does Cody have any idea? He says, not a clue.

Britt lies on a chaise, her eyes closed, when Spinelli clears his throat, startling her. He says, she’s about to make a mistake, and she says, his mistake was looming over her like a vampire. He almost got a swift kick. She gets up, and he says he’s serious. She can’t go out with Cody again.

Britt says she knows Dante wants his partner back, but whether he wants to believe it or not, Chase real future in music. Dante says he knows Chase is a talented guy, but he also happens to know, Chase is thinking things are pretty bleak right now, and he doesn’t want Chase to make a mistake. So please level with him. What the hell do the two of them have cooking up?

Chase tells Linc, that’s great. Tell the development team to send over the promotional package, and he’ll have his lawyers look at it. Linc says, he’s convincing, but not good enough for Linc, or himself. Chase says he’s not sure what Linc is getting at, and Linc says, don’t play a player. He knows Brook, and he knows what she’s really up to.

On Monday, Cody says, might as well put their cards on the table; Willow has the feeling Ava want something from her; Obrecht says, Nina needs to walk away now; and Dex says he just gave Michael the perfect opportunity to nail his old man.

Southern Charm

Austen joins Kathryn for a pedicure at a nail place, unoriginally called The Nail Place. He says he’s excited for girls day, and in his interview, he says he’s always had a soft spot for Kathryn. He did win Drama King in high school, and Kathryn can be dramatic as well. She asks if he’s getting a color, and he says he’s not Craig. Working at home, Craig tells himself, work smarter, not harder. Naomie calls, and he tells her that he’s working on his spring collection. She says she had a strange reaction at Olivia’s, and needs to pick his brain. She asks if he wants to get coffee, and we flash back to Paige saying, it’s inappropriate to hang out with one’s ex. Craig asks why she’s calling him about it, and Naomie says, it’s about Kathryn. She thought he’d be the best person to advise her. We flash back to Craig asking Paige, what about having lunch with an ex? and Paige saying, no. He says, it must be serious enough if she wants to talk in person. He’s going to be over by her later, and there’s a coffee shop nearby. In Craig’s interview, he says, it’s just coffee. He’ll get in and get out. They’re not getting their nails done together. Meanwhile at the nail salon, Austen says he loves Kathryn’s blond look, and she asks how things are going with him and Olivia. He says, they haven’t spoken since the party. It bothered him that after he’d talked to her about Madison, Olivia invited her to the party. He doesn’t want to pursue someone who wants to be friends with his ex. In Kathryn’s interview, she says, sometimes Austen can be a petty bitch.

Olivia and mom Robin discuss the party, and agree it was fun. Robin asks about Austen, and Olivia says, they didn’t end on the best note at the party. We flash back to Olivia telling Austen that she’s waiting for the day he doesn’t care about Madison, and she tells Robin about it. Robin says, he does seem more tense around Madison. She thinks it’s sensitive and sweet, and says, you usually don’t hear about a woman being… whatever [Madison] is. Olivia says, everyone has ex stuff, but she wants Austen to be right in that department. In Olivia’s interview, she says, a relationship with Austen is too much work. She’s not enough drama for him. He seems to like it; it’s what he’s used to. While they get a paraffin foot treatment, Austen says he’s happy Kathryn and Chleb are back together. Kathryn says, they’re trying, but in her gut, she feels like something is off. At the party, he was talking to Naomie a lot. It was weird super and disrespectful, and she felt hurt. We see a clip of Chleb telling Kathryn that Naomie was calling her names, and Kathryn saying, he should have shut it down immediately, not listen because he’s being a good guy. In Kathryn’s interview, she says she wishes he would be more aware of what he’s doing. Loyalty, hello? Austen tells her, if she thinks something off, then something is off.

Leva sees her trainer, and he does some kind of massage/stretching exercises for her muscles. In Leva’s interview, she says she wants to be present. She’s reading books about essentialism, so she doesn’t cook as much, lets the house be messy, and picks her battles at work. She’s consciously practicing to be a calmer person. But it’s not working. She loves Little Lamar, but he’s two and chaotic. We see some clips of Little in action, and she says, he’s so high energy from 6 am until his bedtime at 9 pm, which is her fault. Venita’s mom Vi visits her, and says she loves Venita’s big hair. When she was young, she had big hair. In Venita’s interview, she says, her mother didn’t tell her be perfect. She told Venita that perfect was however she chose to be. Venita tells Vi that she had a bad week. She didn’t get invited to Olivia’s party because Olivia didn’t want the garden party again. She guesses it’s embarrassing, and her feelings are hurt. Vi says, Venita’s got to talk about things, but when she’s rational; not in the heat of anger. Venita says she doesn’t know how to go about it, since she’s never seen it. Vi didn’t show her how to handle things, and hid any disagreements with her dad. Vi says she’s not talking about Venita’s dad, and in her interview, Venita says she was an only child. She was in high school when she came home one day, and her dad was gone. Her parents could have worked for the Secret Service. She had no idea it wasn’t working out. She tells Vi, all she knew was that she had two parents, and then one of them was gone, and Vi says, Venita still has two parents. In Venita’s interview, she says, her dad was probably living a double life since she was about 14. It took until her aunt called and said he was marrying someone else for her to understand her parents were done. Vi says, Venita’s dad was thinking with the wrong part of his anatomy, and it wasn’t something to discuss with her daughter. She didn’t want Venita to see her pain. Venita says she doesn’t have the insight her friends do, because they saw their parents argue, then figure it out. Vi says, it’s probably because she grew up in a house where they did argue, and Venita asks what it taught Vi. Vi says, not to do it, and in her interview, Venita says, teaching you how to avoid fighting doesn’t teach you how to deal with fighting. She’ll get overly upset at a simple confrontation, because she’s never seen anyone do that on a personal level. Vi says she tried to protect Venita from the pitfalls of life, which was not necessarily a good thing. Venita didn’t learn how to handle adversity, and Vi apologizes for what she didn’t do. Going forward, she’ll do her best. Books on parenting don’t work. You have to go through it to learn. She asks if that satisfied Venita, and Venita says, it’s more than she had yesterday.

Little Craig! Shep visits Whitney and Patricia, who’s gotten Little Craig a champagne bottle toy, which she says is unshreddable. Whitney says, Little Craig is like a piranha meets the Tasmanian Devil, and Shep says, his dad calls the dog a French terrorist. New guy Randy is doing the butlering, and Patricia says, nobody can take Michael’s place, but he’s good. Whitney says, Randy alleviates his duties, like official dog walker. In Patricia’s interview, she says, Randy is a lovely man. He’s a good server and fixes drinks so much better than Whitney. We flash back to Whitney bumbling through things, and see that Little Craig is already well on his way to totally destroying his new toy. Patricia says, speaking of incurring damage, Little Craig was involved in Peaches’ violation. Shep asks if they had a roll in the hay, and Whitney says, Little Craig is a feral mess. Done with his toy destruction, Little Craig runs to find Peaches, and Patricia says, let him; the damage has been done. In her interview, Patricia says, mounted is too strong a word. He sullied Peaches’ reputation. She tells Shep that Little Craig has to do the honorable thing. She’d like to have a wedding. (I can’t wait!) Shep asks if she wants Little Craig to make an honest doggy of Peaches, and Patricia says, he thinks she’s kidding. She doesn’t see anybody here doing anything in the near future. Shep says, so they’ll give her the wedding she richly deserves. She asks if Little Craig has a tux. She’s getting Peaches a wedding gown. In Shep’s interview, he says, if Whitney had his way, he’d be a bachelor for life. Still living in hope, Patricia says she doesn’t want to preempt any wedding bells, and asks Shep about Taylor. Shep says, Taylor’s not a pressure type of gal.

Taylor visits Marcie, and checks out the nursery, saying, it’s so pink; she loves it. Marcie says she’s glad she’s done. She’s due in 5 weeks. In Taylor’s interview, she says, in her perfect world she’d get married around 30, and have kids by 33. How old is she now? (I looked it up. She’s 27.) Marcie shows Taylor the outfit she’s taking the baby home in, and they move on to an entire closet full of clothes. In her interview, Taylor says she gets giddy looking at clothes and strollers. Shep’s clock isn’t ticking, but hers is. Shep tells Patricia that he thinks he’s in the clear, but Patricia says, don’t kid yourself. Whitney asks how long they’ve been going out, and Shep says, two years. Patricia says, if there was no proposal after four months, that’s it. In Patricia’s interview, she says, Taylor is making a mistake be acquiescing. She needs to give him an ultimatum. Patricia says, she’s amazed that any woman could put up with the two of them, and Shep says, they’re on the George Clooney/Warren Beatty track.

Naomie calls Craig, saying she’s at the coffee place, and they’re out of chai. She places both their orders, and when he gets there, she asks why he’s grumpy. He insists he’s not, and she asks if he had fun at Olivia’s party. He asks it was about Kathryn she wanted to discuss, and she says, during the party, Chleb came up and started going in about Kathryn. We flash back to that, and Naomie says, Chleb was saying not nice things. Craig says, like what? and we flash back to Chleb saying he could only listen so much to Kathryn, then he’d put on ESPN and tune out. Like practically every man doesn’t do this. She tells Craig, Chleb doesn’t seem happy. The one lesson she learned after her and Craig was, never air your dirty laundry to other people. She has regrets about talking bad about Craig, and she’s pretty sure Metul did the same thing to her. Karma is very real. She wonders what’s making Craig uncomfortable. He’s jittery, making no eye contact, and keeps looking over his shoulder. Who’s coming? She says, he’s acting like she’s part of a sting operation or something. She doesn’t know what’s going on, and wishes he’d just be straight and not act like a weirdo. In Craig’s interview, he wonders why they needed to have coffee for Naomie to tell him that Chleb was talking sh*t about Kathryn. Naomie says she feels bad for Kathryn. They’ll never be good friends, but she feels it’s the right thing to hand Craig the information. Maybe he could just talk to her. He says, maybe, but he’s got to be going. He’s picking up Paige from the airport. Naomie suggests they do a fun night out, and Craig says, one day, maybe. Naomie says she just wants to have fun, but Craig says, unfortunately, there are boundaries. He’s glad they can catch up and be friends, but at the end of the day, Naomie is his ex-girlfriend, and Paige doesn’t appreciate it. They can’t hang out just yet. Naomie says, they can’t forget the past, and in his interview, Craig says he thinks Paige is being understanding, even though she doesn’t understand the situation, since she lives in NYC, where you don’t run into your ex all the time or hang out with them. He doesn’t want to push or disrespect her any further. In Naomie’s interview, she says, if  she hadn’t thought she and Craig were on the same page, she wouldn’t have asked him for coffee. She’s not trying to get with him. She’s not the type who tries to get with a guy who has a girlfriend. If it feels awkward, that’s on them, not her. I can see it both ways, but I’ve never really wanted to hang out with an ex. Oh wait. I do hang out with my boyfriend from high school once in a while, but those feelings are long gone. If they were even real at that age. Now he’s someone I grew up with.

Olivia calls Naomie from the car, and says she’s meeting Venita. Naomie says, awesome; heal it up. They meet at a juice bar, and in Venita’s interview, she says, with her parents, all she’s seen is avoidance of fighting, confrontation, and issues. She wants to step up and resolve this, rather than letting it sit. Venita asks how the party was, and Olivia says, fun. They toast to this thing (i.e. their meeting), and Olivia says she appreciates Venita reaching out. Venita says, they had a rocky start, and she wants to be able to lay everything on the table. Olivia says she thinks Venita has a false perception of who she is, and she was thrown by Venita’s misconceptions. Insinuating something is not cool. Venita says, when Olivia walked away, it felt dismissive, and Olivia gets how it could be perceived, but it’s her way to cool off when she knows nothing is going to get resolved in that moment. Venita apologizes for coming at Olivia so hot. It wasn’t necessary, and it’s not who she is as an individual. She suggests they make it a clean slate. Now they just have to worry about everyone else. She says, with all that smoke and heat between Austen and Madison, why invite Madison to the party? Olivia says, she and Madison are fine, but she got an earful about it. We flash back to Austen acting stupid, and Venita asks if Olivia and Austen are dating. Olivia says, they only went out one-on-one once, and they’re in in that weird limbo. Venita wonders if Madison knows, and Olivia asks why it would matter. Venita says, Madison and Austen were so deeply involved, part of Madison feels entitled to know what’s going on. It’s not worth it.

Chleb goes to mom Debbie’s house, and she asks if he’s working hard. He says, seven days; he’s pretty damn tired. Debbie wonders if he didn’t take the tag off his shoes, but he says, it’s the style. She says, it seems awkward, but he says, it’s the drip these days. She asks how Kathryn is, and he says, they went through some stuff. There was a girl named Naomie at the party who Kathryn dislikes, and she and Chleb got to talking. We see a clip of Kathryn telling Chleb, it’s embarrassing. In Chleb’s interview, he says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with someone he’s thinking negatively about. Debbie says, it takes work, and suggests he make a list of what he likes and dislikes about the relationship. She says, if you have more dislikes than likes, you ain’t gonna make it, baby.

Paige is at Craig’s, and he offers her every coffee flavor known to man. She says, yuck to maple, which is one of my favorites, but she also hates mint, and we’re in agreement there. My only exception is Thin Mint Girl Scout cookies. She asks if he can imagine when they actually have a kitchen, and in Craig’s interview, he says, it’s hard to play house with no kitchen, and living out of boxes. The fact that Paige feels comfortable with things as is, is an incredible sign. Paige suggests sitting outside, and Craig wonders if they make an iced coffee maker. Paige is like, nooo, and says, he loves tea anyway. In his interview, he says, Paige loves how he is, and he loves that feeling. She’s his biggest fan. Aww. They’re not engaged yet, but he thinks he’s found his person. They sit in rockers on the porch, and he tells her that he’d like a big family, and wants to renovate the house with that vision.  

Event planner Erica goes to Patricia’s, and Patricia says she thinks it would be fun to have a dog wedding, so she needed a wedding planner. Erica asks how big it will be, and Patricia says, around 25 people. It might be the only wedding she throws. In Patricia’s interview, she says she has Whitney’s wedding planned. A medieval cathedral, a florist from Paris, Valentino for the mother-of-the-bride dress, but she doesn’t get to make those decisions. Erica asks, who is going to officiate? and Patricia says, Little Craig and Peaches go to the same vet. She thinks Dr. Berger will agree to officiate. They decide on having it in the garden, and Erica asks if Patricia wants the guests welcomed with champagne. Patricia says she does, but she wants it in coups, not flutes. Erica asks about cakes, and Patricia wants the ones featured in Steel Magnolias. The groom’s cake is an armadillo cake in red velvet. She tells Erica, the invitations have already gone out.  

To be continued…

Next time, Whitney and Shep talk human marriage; the dog wedding happens; Olivia brings a date that’s not Austen; Whitney plays guitar; and Craig tells Naomie that she left a loving relationship to be with a controlling a-hole. She won’t affect his life anymore.

🎉 Happy Anniversary…

Scotty celebrates his 45^th.

GENERAL HOSPITAL’s Kin Shriner Opens up About His 40th Anniversary as Scotty (EXCLUSIVE)

GENERAL HOSPITAL Star Kin Shriner Celebrates His 41st Anniversary on the Soap — Relive Scotty’s Most Memorable Moments!

GENERAL HOSPITAL Stars Celebrate Kin Shriner’s 45th Anniversary

💐 Another Congrats…

Not as long, but still. She took a small villainous part and turned it into being a major player.

Kathleen Gati Celebrates Her Anniversary at GENERAL HOSPITAL

🧼 Jumping Soap…

I vaguely remember him being Todd on OLTL for five minutes. Even they realized it was a bad idea. No one can replace Roger Howarth.

Trevor St. John Cast on THE YOUNG & THE RESTLESS!

🦚 Goodbye and Hello…

Yep. They’re going to nickel and dime us to death. Or in this case, $4.99 us.

https://ew.com/tv/days-of-our-lives-moving-to-peacock/

💝 Sharing Is Caring…

NuTrina has a message for all of us.

https://www.soapsindepth.com/posts/general-hospital/ghs-tabyana-ali-shares-an-important-message-with-her-fans

🎡 Yeah, Yeah…

LisaR needs to get off the merry-go-round that’s her feelings. Next week, she’ll be back to the shading game.

RHOBH’s Lisa Rinna Regrets Not Having More “Empathy” for Lisa Vanderpump Amid Grief, Talks Erika Getting Served at Airport, as Andy Calls Her a “Double Disaster” on Instagram, Plus Reacts to Tamra’s Claims About Denise

💎 She’s Rocking the Boat…

Sheree can be on my fantasy spin-off too.

https://www.eonline.com/news/1340467/why-real-housewives-of-beverly-hills-sheree-zampino-says-kyle-richards-should-sit-down

⛴ Cruising the Med…

Captain Sandy’s voyage to reality star.

https://www.vacationer.travel/captain-sandy-yawn-below-deck-mediterannean/

🍸 Backing His Home Girl…

50 Cent is back to dogging Randall.

https://hiphopdx.com/news/id.72274/title.50-cent-randall-emmet-power-ex

⚰️ New Rick…

Daryl’s journey to leadership.

https://screenrant.com/walking-dead-daryl-rick-grimes-revolver/

🌜 On the Moon…

The VMA line-up.

MTV VMAs Reveals DJs & Performers For 2022 Trophy Show – Update

📣 Quotes of the Week

A room hung with pictures is a room hung with thoughts. – Joshua Reynolds

Happiness depends to some extent upon external conditions, but chiefly upon mental attitudes. – Paramahansa Yogananda

Magic exists. Who can doubt it, when there are rainbows and wildflowers, the music of the wind and the silence of the stars? Anyone who has loved has been touched by magic. It is such a simple and such an extraordinary part of the lives we live. – Nora Roberts

The greatest source of unhappiness in the world comes from having unreasonable expectations about the behavior of other people. – Don Fehr

Accept responsibility for your life. Know that it is you who will get you where you want to go, no one else. – Les Brown

Sometimes you make the right decision, and sometimes you have to make the decision right. – Dr. Phil

Security is mostly a superstition… Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. – Helen Keller

Life is like a novel. It’s filled with suspense. You have no idea what is going to happen until you turn the page. – Sidney Sheldon (Well, let’s hope it’s not like a Sidney Sheldon novel.)

If there’s a world here in a hundred years, it’s going to be saved by tens of millions of little things. The powers-that-be can break up any big thing they want… but what are they going to do about 10 million little things? They break up two of them, and three more like them spring up! – Pete Seeger

The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off. – Gloria Steinem

🛣 On the Road Again…

It’s certainly been a week. If it’s been one for you too, or even if it hasn’t, you have my permission to take the next two days off. But be back on Monday for soap and a Mediterranean cruise. Until then, stay safe, stay away from overly processed foods, and stay never trying to play a player.