What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Neil visits Alexis, who’s with Monica. He says he’s sorry to interrupt, but Monica says she was just leaving. Alexis asks how he is, and he says he was about to ask her the same thing. She says other than recovering from rat poisoning, being in this bed, and her daughter in prison for manslaughter, she’s just fine. He says, hold up. Rat poison?

Cameron, Trina, Josslyn, and Dev sit in detention. Cameron asks if Dustin is coming back, and Trina says, that’s the scam. He leaves for coffee, and comes back in time to collect their essays. Josslyn asks if Trina has been there before, but Trina says it’s her first time – thanks. Dev makes a paper airplane out of his essay, and launches it at Cameron, saying he shouldn’t even be there. Cameron says he’s sorry he got drunk and dragged Dev into it. How many times does he have to apologize? Dev asks how many apologies he has left, and Cameron says he’s fresh out. Trina says, it’s going to be a very long day.

At the hospital, Julian sees Elizabeth at the reception desk. He says he’s putting together a surprise for Brad and Lucas, and asks if he can see their schedules. He wants to know when they’re off at the same time. She says, absolutely not, but she’ll check for him. She looks on the computer, and says, Lucas is a sweetheart. He volunteered to work on Thanksgiving. Julian says, all day? Without Brad?

Franco goes to Monica’s office. She says she thought he already moved with Kim, and he says, about that. They need to talk.

At Turning Woods, Stella asks Mike how he’s feeling. He’s fiddling with some shoe laces, and doesn’t look up. She asks if he needs help. Sonny and Carly come in, and Sonny says Stella is there bright and early. Carly asks how Mike is doing, and Stella says, it’s not a good day. Sonny says he’s used to seeing Mike live in the past, but Stella says, it’s worse than that. They go over to Mike, and Sonny says, hey, dad. Look who he brought. Carly says, long time, no see, but he looks at them blankly.

Alexis tells Neil that TJ put the symptoms together, and found out it was thallium poisoning. It was banned in 1965, but they did a lab test, and he was right. Neil says she looks better, and she says, the cure is blue paint; Prussian blue to be exact. It’s pretty, and she’s alive. Neil says if it was banned, it’s not because of a careless exterminator, and Alexis says they believe it was deliberate. Neil asks, who would do that? and she says she’s a lawyer. They’re not known for making friends. TJ comes in, and Alexis says she was just singing his praises. Neil tells him, well done. TJ says he’s glad his guess was the right one, and Alexis asks what brings him by. He says he was hoping she might have a minute, and Neil says he’ll go get some coffee. He leaves, and Alexis says, before TJ tells her what he’s got to say, she saw the look between them. It wasn’t subtle. What’s up? He wants to talk about Molly.

Julian thanks Elizabeth, and she asks if he’s heard from Kim. He says, no, and he doesn’t expect to. They’re definitely over. She says there are some things he doesn’t know about Franco that affect Kim, but he says it’s not in him to talk about Kim. There’s just scorched earth between them.

Dev and Trina play basketball with crumpled paper balls and the trash can. Josslyn says Dev is being a jerk; it’s his default setting. Cameron says that’s not why he’s worked up. He tells Josslyn that he’s sorry. He should have never talked her into drinking. She points to the board with the essay topic, and says, how your actions affect those around you, and how you can do better. He didn’t pour it down her throat though. Cameron says he was stupid, and Trina says, they were all stupid. Dev says, except him. He was downright heroic, but he got punished anyway. He  doesn’t know how he could do any better. He was selfless. Josslyn tells him to write that down, and Dustin might give him the answer. Trina asks how Dev intends to do better.

Franco tells Monica, when they met, she was looking to know Drew. He says, if there’s anything he can tell her, or any questions he can answer to help ease the pain of her loss, he’ll be glad to. She says she’d like that very much.

Carly asks Mike if he needs help with the laces. He asks where they go, and she says she can show him. Sonny says Mike is having a bad day; worse than the last time. Stella says the nurse told her it varies significantly from day to day. Sonny says she told him that too. Carly tells Mike, he’s all set, and he smiles. Stella tells Sonny when she saw him yesterday, Mike thought he was a young man with his whole life ahead of him. Does Sonny remember when they started this journey, what she told him about forgiveness? Sonny says she told him that he needed to forgive his dad for leaving him. Stella says, and to forgive himself for letting him leave.

Elizabeth tries to tell Julian about Franco, but he tells her, don’t. He can’t tear himself apart about those two, and she shouldn’t either. She should close that chapter of her life, move on, and survive. That’s what he’s doing.

TJ tells Alexis, this is very traditional; old school. He has the deepest respect for her and Molly. He loves Molly more every day, and wants to cement… She says, cement? He amends it to, secure their future. He wants to ask Alexis’s permission to ask Molly for her hand in marriage. So what does she say? Alexis says he doesn’t want to do that.

They kids lie in a circle on the floor, their heads pointed toward the middle, eating potato chips. I guess we’re going Breakfast Club here. Cameron says, sour cream and onion; the least imaginative flavor. What about barbecue sauce? Josslyn says she likes it on French fries. Which brings her to the question, which flavor is their favorite? Cameron says, original, and Josslyn asks, how can that be less boring? He says, it’s pure and honest. Just potato with a dash of salt. Trina says her favorite is sea salt and vinegar. Josslyn says her mom likes those, but they taste sour. Trina says if she has them on a sandwich, it will change her life. (My favorite is dill pickle, but I make a mental note to try Trina’s suggestion.) Josslyn asks what about Dev? and Dev says it’s going to be a shock, but he agrees with Cameron. The best ones are the original. Josslyn says all varieties are going to be at her Lady and the Tramp viewing party (and she makes a plug for Disney+). Trina says they need to have spaghetti and meatballs too. Cameron says, it’s a cartoon, but Trina says, it’s live action. Cameron says, dogs eating spaghetti, and Josslyn tells him not to question how they do it. It will also be their post-detention consolation party.

Monica tells Franco that traditionally the Quartermaines get together on Thanksgiving, and she’d like him to join them. He asks if she’s sure it’s a good idea. She says it’s a chance to be with the family, and if circumstances were different, they’d be his family. She’d love for him to be there. He’s not sure everyone else feels the same way, but she says, who cares? It’s her house. He thanks her, and says, there’s one other thing. The Navy put his personal effects in a storage locker in San Diego. Maybe she’d like to pass them along to Drew’s daughter. Monica is sure Scout would love to have them. She knows she would too.

Mike works on a jigsaw puzzle. Sonny tries to help, and Mike yells, no! It’s his puzzle. He calls Sonny Anthony, and tells him to find his own. Sonny sits, and Mike puts his head in his hands. Carly tells Stella, this is more than just a bad day. Stella says the staff told her that Mike has suffered significant cognitive decline. Carly says, it’s weird. It’s taking forever, yet it’s happening all at once. Stella says, the disease progresses at an uneven pace. Carly asks if he’ll have good days again, and Stella says, it depends on how you define good. Days when he’s living in the past, but in happy memories, are a different good, but it only gets harder from there. Mike tells Sonny, that’s how you do it. He’s too young. When he’s older, Mike will teach him how to do it. Stella tells Mike that it’s time for her to say goodbye now. She wants to tell him how much she enjoyed his friendship. He gets up, and asks if she can take Anthony with her. Anthony is getting in his way. Stella tells him, Anthony’s mom is coming in a little bit, and asks if Mike can keep him a little longer. Mike says, okay, fine, but he’s not letting Anthony have his ice cream. Sonny says he doesn’t want any, and Mike says he’s a liar. He’ll try to take some, but Mike won’t let him. Carly says she thinks there’s enough for everyone. Stella tells Mike it was good seeing him, and Mike takes her hand, saying he’ll see her around the neighborhood. She kisses his forehead, and he smiles. Sonny and Carly walk Stella to the door, and Sonny says they can’t begin to thank her for everything she’s done. She says, it was an honor to know him. She’s crying, and a sob bursts out of me. Carly says Mike loves her; she knows that. Stella says she promised Mike a long time ago, when this time came she’d speak for him, and tell them both that he loves them, and how much he needs them to do what’s important for him, and help him say goodbye. As hard as it is, they’ll be able to do that for him because Sonny is a good son. Sonny and Carly hug her, and Carly says they’re so grateful. She’s always welcome in their family. Stella tells them to take good care of the children.

TJ says he doesn’t want to what? and Alexis says he doesn’t want to ask permission to marry Molly. He loves her, but they’re talking Molly. She tells him to sit, and says, when Molly was eight years old, they watched Fiddler on the Roof together. By the time it was over, Molly said she was going to take down the patriarchy. He says, at eight years old? and she says, yes. Molly used that word. The three daughters were her heroes because they defied family, faith, and tradition to make their own choices. So no permission. She loves the old school approach, but if he asked Molly about Alexis giving permission for her hand, she’d say it wasn’t Alexis’s to give. TJ says she’s so right. He doesn’t know why he didn’t see it. She says he was caught up in the romance. For the record. Molly is romantic too. She loves the knights and damsels, as long as they rescue each other equally. Now he has to figure out a way for Molly to say yes. TJ thanks her for helping him. She says, that’s what future mothers-in-law do. He doesn’t need her blessing, but should they decide to get married, they have it. He says he’ll take it, and she tells him, good luck. He hugs her, and leaves.

The kids are now playing volleyball, using overturned chairs as a net. Trina wonders, which is worse; telling your greatest secret or telling someone who doesn’t like you that you like them? Cameron says, for some people, it’s the same thing. Trina says, not for her. Cameron says tell them her great secret, and she says, last year she took a DNA test as part of a project, and it said she had a direct relative there in Port Charles. It’s crazy, since her mother is the only relative she’s ever had there. Josslyn asks if she’s met them, but Trina says, what if they’re a crazy freak? Dev says, what if they’re a gazillionaire looking for a long, lost heir? She says, that doesn’t happen, and it’s not worth the risk. She shut it down. Cameron says, that’s not a secret; it’s something she hasn’t told them. She says, it’s all she’s got. What about Cameron? Josslyn asks, what’s his secret?

Julian sees Neil with two coffees, and asks if one of those is for Alexis. Neil says it is, and Julian says, she must be feeling better. Neil says, let it suffice to say they’ve figured out what’s wrong and she’s expected to fully recover. Julian says, she must be relieved, and Neil says, to a point. She got sick because she ingested rat poison, and there’s almost no way it could be by accident. Julian says there were dead rats in the alley behind Charlie’s, and he thinks they were poisoned as well.

Carly wonders why Sonny didn’t tell her about Mike sooner, and he says he just thought it was a run of bad days. Some days were good, and Mike was his normal self, flirting with the nurses, and tending to Yvonne. He just hoped Mike would get better. Carly understands wanting that, but it’s not going to happen. They’ve discussed how the disease is progressing. Now there will be bad days or worse days. Sonny thought they could hold it off a little longer. Mike stares into space, breaking my heart into a million pieces.

Julian tells Neil, the only time anyone is out in the alley is to dump garbage. A couple of days before the dead rats showed up, he ran into Kendra. He was making a call, and saw her dumping something in the trash. He didn’t think anything of it, but then the rats were dead. Neil asks how long it was happening, but Julian says, just once. He scrubbed the place down, and he called in the exterminator, and it never happened again. Alexis started to get sick around the same time the rats were killed. Neil thanks him, and says, that was helpful. He tells Julian that he wants to get the coffee upstairs before it gets cold, and takes the next elevator.

What Cameron wants to know is what Josslyn is writing every day, ten times a day. She says, treasure maps and nuclear launch codes. It’s private. He says, that’s a secret, but she says she has others. Trina says, it’s still Cameron’s turn. He says, it’s hard to think of something Josslyn doesn’t know. They’ve known each other their whole lives. He says, but there’s Dev, the mysterious Corbin cousin from Connecticut. Why is he really there?

Franco and Elizabeth see each other on the stairs, and she asks how he is. He says he just saw Monica. He thought he should give her the news in person. She asks how Monica took it, and he says, she’s great. She’s a very understanding person. When he first saw the newspaper with Jason’s picture, and found out he had a twin and was a Quartermaine, he didn’t think they’d ever want him or accept him. Not only was he wrong, in the end, he thinks Monica would have been a good mom. She’s been a good friend. Elizabeth says, that’s the kind of person she is. He says he should probably go work out, and she says it was nice seeing him. He says, her too.

Stella meets TJ at the café. She says she missed him, and he says he missed her too. And apparently, he’s going to miss her again. He heard she’s not staying. She says it’s just a quick stop to extend her visa, then she’s flying back to London. It’s the adventure of her life. She tells him that he can visit her when he can. He says he’d love to someday. In meantime, he’s going ask Molly marry him. Stella thought that might be what he had to tell her. She takes his hand, and says she knows how much he loves Molly. What’s not to love? She’s a brilliant, remarkable young woman. And fiery. Her fight for Charles Street was a sight. TJ says he was proud of her. Stella says the thing is, if he does this, it will be a hard road for them. TJ says he knows. They still have to finish school, and get their careers and lives in gear. She says they do, but she’s not talking about that. She’s talking about the fact Molly is white.

TJ says, it doesn’t matter to him, and he can’t believe it matters to her. Stella says, let her finish. She loves Molly, and will welcome her into the family. He asks what the problem is then, and she says, they only see through their hearts to each other. The idea that we live in a color blind world is a fantasy. He says she doesn’t have to tell him. She’s glad he’s proud of his culture, and how it defines his place in the world, but he doesn’t have to look far to know not a lot of people feel that way. As hard as it is now, it’s been worse. The right for a man like him to be with a woman like Molly, has only been protected for fifty-two years. There are people out there who want to turn back the clock. Not just stop them, but punish them for loving each other in the first place. TJ asks if she wants to let them win, and she says, far from it. She wants him to be safe. The world has changed, but there’s still plenty to be afraid of.

Dev says he got in trouble at his old school; that’s why he’s there. He cheated on all of his tests. His father was furious, and sent him away. Now they know everything. Trina says, he was sent away after his father was dead? Dev says, before he died, he told Dev’s grandmother that he wanted Dev to go to Uncle Sonny’s. Trina asks if he doesn’t mean cousin, and he says, of course (🍷). He meant cousin. Cameron says, didn’t his father die a long time ago? Trina says Dev is a terrible liar, and Cameron says, the worst. It’s surprising. When Dev first got to Port Charles, he was smoother. Trina asks, is Sonny his cousin or not?

Neil tells Alexis that he ran into Julian, who sends his best. She asks what else he said, and Neil says her life coach came up. She asks what Julian said about her, and he says, not much. Just that they all seem to have their own approach to work. What exactly are they working on?

Sonny says it’s hard to see his dad like that. Carly kisses him, and says she knows. She loves Mike too. Whatever time they have left, they’ll make the most of it. Embrace the good days, and help each other through the bad ones. Mike asks if the ice cream will be there soon. She says she’d like some too, and Mike says, the kid would love some, meaning Sonny. She says she’ll see what she can do.

Julian says he thought Franco and Kim left town. Franco says they were going to, and Julian tells him not to stay too long. He’s ruined enough lives already. Julian starts to leave, and Franco says, this town ain’t big enough for both of them? Is that what Julian is saying? Julian says Franco is a human wrecking ball. They’ll all be better off when he clears out. Franco says, there’s been a change of plans. He’s staying there. Kim is gone, but he didn’t go with her. Julian says he thought Franco said there isn’t anything keeping him there. Franco says, there isn’t, but there are things keeping Franco there. He volunteered for the procedure to restore Franco’s memory. Julian says, what about Kim? He made all these promises to her, and now he’s backing out? Franco looks confused, as we all do.

Dev asks, why are they ganging up on him? It’s Cameron’s turn. Cameron tells him to answer the question. Trina says, is he or is he not Sonny’s cousin? and Cameron says, and if he isn’t, who is he?

Stella tells TJ just being a Black man alone puts him at risk. He says he remembers being detained by security for shopping while Black. She says, a lot worse has happened to a lot more people. It doesn’t matter if they’re poor or rich, or what they’ve done with their lives. He could be on a drive minding his own business. TJ says he doesn’t want to live in fear, and doesn’t want that for her either. She says, when you’re in danger, fear can save you. She tells him to walk through the world with his eyes open, but don’t let it diminish one ounce of the love in his heart. He says he won’t. Do they have her blessing? She says they do, and asks him to promise to be true to himself – all parts of himself – so the rest of them can learn from that truth. He promises, and she says she has faith that all of them will be better off for it. As for the wedding, she intends on sitting in the front row. They hug, and she says she loves him so much.

Elizabeth asks if Monica has a minute, and Monica says she was kind of expecting her. Elizabeth says she ran into Franco, and he told her that he let Monica know he was going through with the procedure. Monica says, Drew believes it’s the best thing to do. She’s sure Elizabeth does too. Elizabeth says she just wants her husband back. Monica tells her, as she knows, there are no guarantees she’ll get Franco back. Elizabeth asks if letting Drew live his life is okay, and Monica says she thinks so. Elizabeth says Franco knows the what’s at stake, and what he stands to lose. She wishes it had never come to this. Monica says, so does she, but here they are, and whatever the resolution, there will always be heartache. He’s a brave man putting his life on the line. She hopes his bravery isn’t for nothing.

Julian calls Franco a selfish, self-centered SOB. Was he using Kim’s love for him for nostalgic sex? Franco says he loves Kim, and Julian says he has a funny way of showing it. He’s shredding her life; all that pain and hurt for nothing. Franco says the procedure is going to kill him, and Julian says he hopes it does. Franco says he’s not sure where Kim will wind up, but wherever she lands, she’s going to need a friend. Julian says it sure as hell won’t be him.

Mike, Sonny, and Carly sit on the couch, eating ice cream, and the three of them look happy.

Alexis tells Neil, Kendra is great. She got Alexis to mediate for ten seconds, which is better than thinking about it, then binge watching. She’s been exploring her life goals as well. Neil asks if Kendra’s main concentration isn’t fitness, and Alexis says, and nutrition. Out with the bad foods, and in with the supplements. Neil says she got sick around the time she started taking the supplements, but she says she took it to her doctor, who checked the ingredients. It was all fine. Does he think Kendra is poisoning her?

Tomorrow, Dustin asks Lulu what she’s doing for Thanksgiving, Neil tells Alexis that her life coach poisoned her, Valentin tells someone they have to move on this, and Nikolas says he got Hayden into this, let him get her out.

Below Deck

Arghhh! It’s pirate day. Captain Lee tells Ashton that he ordered a new deckhand. He wants to get her on board as soon as possible. Ashton asks if he can look at a copy of their CD, and the captain says he already knows it. It’s Rhylee. In Captain Lee’s interview, he says he knows Rhylee is a hard worker. It’s his choice; his call. He’s bringing her back. He tells Ashton that he knows she had issues with Ross and Chandler, but he thinks Chandler was over-the-top (agreed), and Ross didn’t set boundaries (also agreed). Maybe this will be like Goldilocks and the Three Bears, and he’ll be just right. He thinks Rhylee just needs to be channeled properly. In his interview, Ashton says he’s not happy. She’s emotional and reactive.

In Kate’s interview, she says, pirate day, how basic of them. Get an eye patch, get a parrot, get a sword, get a hat. Doesn’t it get old after childhood? Brian’s says his leg is worse than yesterday, but he took some painkillers, so he’ll be okay.

Drunken idiot primary Michael toasts to getting booty. In the galley, Ashton tells Tanner and Brian that he’s not sure what’s happening with Brian’s leg, so the captain is bringing in a deckhand. It’s someone who was with him last season – Rhylee. She likes to stay informed, and be part of the team. She’s someone he has a lot of history with. Brian says, like Kate, and Tanner asks what kind of painkillers is he taking? He won’t stop. Kate says they need more Jell-O shots. The captain calls Kate to the bridge, and tells her about Rhylee joining the crew. She says, how perfect, and he says he thinks so. She says, it’s pirate day, and Rhylee is coming back. In her interview, Kate says they had a rough start in Tahiti, and we flash back to that. By the end of the season, she loved Rhylee. She says she has to clean her room.

Kevin asks where Simone is, and Kate says she was up late; she’s just getting up. Kevin tells Courtney to get the deckhands to serve, and Courtney radios for someone to come. In his interview, Kevin says, Kate is used to serving food through a Burger King window. She doesn’t realize the work that goes into this, so he has to take over. Says the guy who forgot to order seafood for the seafood extravaganza. We flash back to times he’s thought Kate was lacking. He says he shouldn’t have to do this. He should just worry about the food. Kate gets to the galley, and Kevin is giving out the bowls. In Kate’s interview, she says, now the deckhands are serving breakfast. That’s a new one. He’s a control freak. Kevin tells them not to forget their pirate accents. Whatever it is he served, it must be spicy, because there’s a lot of reaction by the guests. Not in a bad way; just surprised. Anchor is dropped and locked.

Kevin asks if Ashton has any pirate flare, and Ashton says he has a big sword. Guest Shani flirts with him, and in Ashton’s interview, he says he often enjoys the game more than getting something out of it. She says he’s like forbidden fruit. She doesn’t look like his type though. Simone is straightening up the lounge, and Michael harasses her, saying she’s from South Africa, and he’s from North America; opposites attract. He asks if she’s wearing a garter, and does she want him to take it off?  Brian leaves in the tender to pick up Rhylee.

When Rhylee arrives, Kate tells her that they’re going to be roommates. In her interview, Rhylee says, since Tahiti, she’s been on a fishing charter. She wants to learn more about the lay of the land for a yacht. She goes up to say hello to Captain Lee, who thanks her for coming on short notice. She says she couldn’t not help out when they’re in a tight spot. He tells her that Ashton is her bosun. Respect the rank, and do her job, and everything will be fine. In his interview, Captain Lee says he hopes Rhylee doesn’t let her dump truck mouth overload her wheelbarrow ass. I’m not quite sure what that means, but it sounds good. Rhylee asks if Ashton is pleasantly surprised. In Ashton’s interview, he says he’s definitely not ready for this.

The captain tells Ashton that he’s explained to Rhylee how things go on the boat. Treat her like one of the guys, and they’ll get through the season. In Ashton’s interview, he says he already has anxiety. We flash back to an altercation between the two of them. He says then, he could deal with her at arm’s length, but he’s the bosun now, so she’s his problem. He’s not looking forward to it. Captain Lee tells her, welcome aboard. In Rhylee’s interview, she says it makes her nervous with Ashton in a leadership role, but she’s not going to let it deter her from doing her job and being her.

The guests play in the water. Ashton tells Brian to stay off his leg for as long as he can. In his interview, Brian says he’s not a person who can stay still, and he feels guilty. Courtney says they have Rhylee now. Rhylee joins them, and asks Brian, how’s it going? Why is she there? He tells her, Abbi left, and she says, thanks, Abbi. In her interview, she says she’s happy to be there. Everything about Brian screams sexy to her. She’s looking forward to seeing more of him. Michael pops into the galley, and says he and Simone are going shark diving. Simone says she doesn’t think so. In Kevin’s interview, he says he’s feeling awkward. Michael is being inappropriate to Simone, and he’s standing six feet away. Michael tells Simone she’s good at what she does, and she thanks him while escaping up the stairs. He says they’re going to break some rules. Kate says the guests are way too comfortable.

Ashton tells Rhylee, they’re starting fresh. In Rhylee’s interview, she says, last season, she was left out deck meetings and the heavy lifting. She hopes Ashton makes her feel part of the team. Ashton says he wants open communication, and Rhylee says she has no problem expressing any issues. He says they’ll do a quick walk around. Brian asks Courtney about following her on Instagram. She says she followed him, and he didn’t follow her back, but he says he’s looking for her. Simone is confused about the process of making ice coffee, and Courtney volunteers to make it. In Kate’s interview, she says Simone is training herself in service on this charter, and she’s training herself in patience.

Ashton shows Rhylee the boat, and where everything is. They run into Michael, and Ashton literally picks him up and carries him, depositing him in Rhylee’s arms. She plops him on a chair. Kevin sings in the galley, and says he’s going to take a food photo for Instagram. Normally, Kate does it, but she’s not there. That’s because she’s decorating the pirate day table with gold coins. Courtney takes the picture. In Kevin’s interview, he says the heat and humidity make Thailand’s produce beautiful. He loves how quick and simple it is to work with. Kate asks if he wants to go out there, and he says he likes making her job easier. She says, same. Michael dumps water on Shani, who isn’t too happy about that, and throws some back on him. Or maybe it’s a drink. I have no clue. The captain asks Kate, what’s for dinner? and she says, big steaks. She’s going with a country/western theme, and giving everyone bandanas. Michael bugs Simone about going shark diving, saying he’ll be the shark, and she can be the diver. Simon says, o-m-g., and he says, once you go white… Kate asks Simone to meet her in the galley. She tells Simone that she’s getting weird vibes from the primary, and it’s past point of being appropriate. She tells Simone to help with laundry, and says she’ll call when they need her. She thanks Kate, saying, the primary is drunk and creepy. In Kate’s interview, she says, it happens sometimes. The guests think they can do whatever they want, but that doesn’t make it okay. As Simone’s boss, it’s her job remove Simone from the situation. Michael makes rude gestures, and says, it’s the last day. Let’s get as drunk and disrespectful as we can. And these people are like, forty???

I have to interject that I’m astounded, and just a little sick, watching this moronic beast be abusive to Simone.

Kate talks over the menu with Kevin, saying she wants to do a country/western theme. Kevin says he’s doing a steakhouse menu, simple and classic. He lived in Denver, and experienced American cuisine; it’s all about meat. Ashton takes the guests out on the tender to watch the sunset. Shani says it’s pirate day, and he can tie her up, as she runs her foot up his leg. In Ashton’s interview, he says he hasn’t had much luck with the ladies this season. It’s hard not be tempted be a woman constantly hitting on him, but he can’t do that. If he took up with a guest he’d be fired.

Kate shows Rhylee their room, and says she’s as sloppy as a man. Ashton tells Rhylee to get over her jet lag, and rest. Kate wants to country it up tonight. Tanner asks how Simone is feeling, and she says she’s ready for the guy to go. Tanner thinks Simone has a crush on him, and he says they’ll see what happens tomorrow night. Michael asks Simone where her garter is, and if she left it in his room. Captain Lee joins them for dinner, and says Michael is the epitome of lit. Kevin says, the girls will take out the sides, and the boys will take out the steaks. Kate says, it’s very sister wife. In Kate’s interview, she says it’s a blow to her ego that only Kevin gets to decide how the meal is served. She’s head of service, but she’s been made into a side piece. Kate tells Kevin, it’s nice to have all the active crew members in the galley. In her interview, she says she can’t live like this. She knows Kevin has control issues, but the least he can do is not overstep his boundaries. It’s bullsh*t. She knows it, and he knows it.

Kevin says he’s glad it’s over. Kate asks how the guests are doing, and Michael says they like seeing her smile. He’s just saying what the captain is thinking. Captain Lee says, with that, he’s bidding them adieu. Kevin asks Kate if it’s been a rough day, and Kate says she’s pissed off at him about dinner. He took her job without consulting her, and made her and girls side bitches. It made her feel like sh*t. Kevin says he thought they’d all go out together, and Kate says she understands the concept, but it’s never been done that way. In Kevin’s interview, he says, everything is always different. If Kate doesn’t take charge, that makes him have to take charge. Kate says they take the  time to plan, then at the last minute, he pulls the rug out. In her interview, Kate says she’s doing her best to make Kevin’s job as easy as possible. If he continues to disrespect her position, his job can become more difficult.

Michael hunts down Simone. BTW, every time he sees her, he goes, Simone, Simone, like he thinks he’s slick. It’s stomach turning. He broaches the subject of shark diving again, and gets a negative. He asks if she’ll just sit on the boat, but she says she doesn’t agree with the concept of shark diving. In her interview, she asks if this day can’t end and these people just go. She tells Courtney, it’s unnerving. If it was a normal environment, she’d say something; it’s so inappropriate. Courtney says she could tell by his picture he was going to be a sleazebag, but Simone says she thought he’d be a nice geek. It’s a huge contrast from yesterday. We flash back to her talking to Tanner. She tells Courtney that she and Tanner were chit-chatting, and thinking about it makes her feel better. Kate says she doesn’t want either one of them up with the primary. She bets he does this to every waitress. Everyone goes to bed.

It’s the final day of charter. Tanner asks if Rhylee wants to help deflate the slide. He jokes about a double pump, and she says, it’s too early for sexual innuendo. It’s her first slide experience. In her interview, she says the most appealing thing about working on a yacht is getting to travel the world. She’s always wanted to visit Thailand. She tells Tanner that she has a trucker’s mouth. Captain Lee sees Michael wandering around, and says, don’t let him come in here. He radios Kate and tells her the primary is up, but it’s too late. Michael is in the wheelhouse. Kate says, hide your wives; the primary is up. Rhylee hooks up the slide, and Tanner says she’s a helluva hooker. Nice job. Brian tries to get out of bed, but can’t. Ashton goes to his cabin, and Brian says he can’t walk on his leg. Ashton says, it’s hot; that’s not good. In Ashton’s interview, he says, Brian’s leg is worse, and he might end up losing him. In Brian’s interview, he says his leg feels excruciating. He needs to see a doctor asap.

Michael wanders into the galley next, and asks for chicken stir fry. Kevin says, sure, but in his interview, he says, go eff yourself. Ashton tells the captain that Brian is worse. His calf is swollen. Whenever Brian or Ashton say, calf, I think they’re saying, cough, and wonder why Brian has a cough. In his interview, Captain Lee says, there’s no way Brian can finish the charter. They’ll have to replace him. How can he get by with a one-legged deckhand? Breakfast service begins, and Kevin pounds the chicken. Ashton shows Rhylee how to deal with the anchor. Ashton says he’d rather have Rhylee on deck, working hard and willing to learn, and being part of the team. The captain announces the final approach.

Tanner says Rhylee is on her A-game, and she says, more like her age game. The captain hopes the goodbyes are brief and to the point. Michael asks if Simone is glad she met him, and in her interview, she’s like, just go already. When they’re gone, Captain Lee heaves a huge sigh, and tells the crew to get the boat cleaned up. Courtney gets Brian coffee, and the doctor arrives. He tells Brian that he has an infection, and he’ll give Brian an antibiotic injection. The captain says an infection never entered his mind, which surprises me, since Brian cut his knee when he fell. Brian says he’ll take anything he can get. The doctor gives him a shot in the butt, and says it will take about three days. Ashton asks if the doctor can do anything about Brian’s face, and they all laugh.

Tip meeting this charter wow rather have someone pull through knot hole in fence by dick than have these guys back. When Michael handed him the tip money, he said the captain was going to be speechless, and he was, but not in good way. The tip is $15K, which sounds like a lot, but isn’t, especially for these messy guests. In Kate’s interview, she says, eff you, Michael. Eff you. Captain Lee says he appreciates them. He knows gratitude can’t replace cold, hard cash, but they have his. He tells them to go out tonight, but work as long as they feel they need to first to get the boat flipped.

Kev makes martinis, and sings as he uses the shaker. In his interview, he says, what a d*ck. Obviously, the helicopter business is not going well, but he’s not letting it ruin his night. The girls get in one taxi, and the guys in another. Rhylee asks how Courtney feels about Brian, and she says she doesn’t know him well, but thinks he’s cute. They go to a restaurant with a huge outdoor area. Rhylee says she hasn’t had a chance to get to know the crew yet, and everyone does a shot. Kate asks Kevin to order starters, and Rhylee asks if he can include something paleo. Kevin jokes about restrictive diets, but she says she’s not on the diet. She wants to drink her weight in calories, but eat better food. Here’s where it gets weird. Kevin gets stuck on saying if she’s on a certain diet, she should order herself; he’s not her chef. She keeps saying she’s not on any special diet; she just wanted him to order something like that. It starts to get loud, and Kate is embarrassed. Well, it isn’t the first time. Rhylee asks wtf is Kevin’s problem?

Rhylee says Kevin was ordering for the table, and she just wanted him to add a paleo dish. If he doesn’t want the responsibility, don’t take it on. In Ashton’s interview, he wonders, what the hell is going on? Rhylee’s just been there a few hours, and she’s going full-on at one of the crew members. He was hoping she’d changed, but a leopard doesn’t change its spots. Actually, they do, but that’s a conversation for another time. He says, here we go – boom! Tanner and Kevin sit on the beach.

Kevin is still stuck in the loop in his head that Rhylee is on a special diet, and says she should have looked at the menu. They had a sh*t charter, topped off by this sh*t. Kate is pissed at him, and now Rhylee is on his back as well. I think I’m getting it. Kevin was mad already about what Kate said, and I’m guessing he doesn’t know what’s in a paleo diet and got flustered. It wouldn’t surprise me, since he doesn’t even know a seafood extravaganza requires seafood. I’m never letting that go. Ever.

At the table, leis are given out. Rhylee says she’s not trying to start a fight; chef was rude, and it pissed her off. The guys come back, and Kevin says he can’t be bothered. Rhylee calls him chef, and he tells her not to call him that; it’s annoying. Tanner calls for shots. Kevin asks if Rhylee is going to want something paleo, like potato vodka. She says, that’s not paleo. She thought he would know that. Ha-ha! I was right. He says it was a joke, and she says she didn’t get it. He tells her to bring a baseball glove next time. In Kate’s interview, she says, it’s like what would happen if a pet store broke the rules and put two beta fish in the same tank. It’s a recipe for disaster. In Simone’s interview, she says Kevin has been super condescending since day one, and has met his match. She thanks the universe, and says, show him, Rhylee. Rhylee asks Kevin what his problem is, and he says she’s not the special superstar she thinks she is.

Having a smoke on the sidelines, Kate tells Courtney that they’re fighting over nothing, and Kevin is obnoxious. In Tanner’s interview, he says, it’s only Rhylee’s second day, and she’s creating drama. The guys go back to the beach, and Rhylee says she thought Kevin was the cool one of the group. Ashton tells the guys that he’s not letting her rock the boat of their happy, existing family. Don’t get sucked into her bullsh*t. Rhylee goes over to him, and asks if she made them uncomfortable. Ashton says he’s embarrassed by the way his crew members are acting.. Rhylee says, members, not member, and he tells her he said plural. She’s been on the boat for two days, and it’s déjà vu already. She asks, why? and he says she’s creating drama. She asks if he thinks it was her fault, and he says, yes. She asks, why? and he says, she raised her voice. Courtney thinks this is getting carried away. Ashton says, the one who acts out most and reacts, is the person who’s an idiot. Unfortunately, it’s her. He starts to walk away, and says, she’s a joke. She says he never wants to talk about problems. Tanner tries to interject, and she asks, who is he? STFU. Ashton says she doesn’t belong there. She belongs on a fishing boat in Alaska. She says, buy her an effing ticket, and she’ll go back.

Tanner wants to hook up with Simone, an all moms charter, the captain is dubbed the silver fox, Kate says Simone made their department look bad, and Captain Lee doesn’t think Brian can finish the season.

⚾ Because It’s Never-Ending…

Kind of like a Mets game I went to once. Their kids will be in college by the time we stop hearing about it.

https://www.eonline.com/news/1096216/jim-edmonds-daughter-hangs-out-with-nanny-following-meghan-king-edmonds-drama

😭 I Have So Much FOMO…

And I want a Giggy jacket too.

https://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/lisa-vanderpump-out-with-camille-grammer-kim-richards-photos?cid=soc_tw_Bravo_RHOBH_Dish

🍸 In Case You Haven’t Seen It…

The trailer for the next season of Vanderpump Rules.

https://radaronline.com/videos/vanderpump-rules-trailer-fights-hookups-drama-stassi-katie-kristen-jax-tom-brawl/

🌅 New Wives On the Horizon…

What happens in Utah stays on Bravo.

https://www.bravotv.com/watch-what-happens-live-with-andy-cohen/season-16/videos/introducing-the-real-housewives-of-salt?cid=soc_tw_Bravo_WWHL_RHOSL_Show

🎂 They Say It’s My Birthday…

And while this isn’t what I really, really want, it’s still fun. Warning: Bad words ahead.