(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
Fear the Walking Dead
Nick burns the crops. I guess he’s still not done fighting the weevils. Too bad they can’t feed the weevils to the zombies and get the zombies to do the farming.
Al asks what they did to Nick. She tells him that she’s just trying to help. They’re all breathing, which means they’re on the same team. Victor thinks they should have reached the turn-off by now. Al says she gave them the right directions, just not all of them. She wants their stories, and they want to know where she found the flag. She’s not letting them take her van or threaten them anymore. Nick says this is how it’s going to be, and Al asks if he knows how many times she’s been zip-tied. She manages to grab Nick, getting him to drop is weapon, and tells Luci to pull over. Nick tells Luci not to do it. They see a cluster of zombies, and Al says, change of plans; keep driving. There’s a scuffle, thanks to Nick, and Luci turns, but into a ditch. Nice going. Although a few zombies were creamed in the process.
Nick makes stupid faces as he comes to, and John reaches for the wheel.
Nick is back at the stadium. Madison asks if he’s okay, and tells him she’s going on a run. He says he’s coming; he wants to help.
Nick wakes up next to a pile of zombies, and John trying to get the truck out. Al says they have to get a tow. Then they’ll talk about whatever they have to – or not. They can go on their way if they want. Luci thinks they could use a truck from a service yard she saw. Victor says often the start of a negotiation requires an act of faith. John asks Al if she trusts him, and Al says, probably not. She unties all of them, hesitating when she gets to Victor. She ties Nick to the truck. Morgan says he’ll only slow them down, so he’ll stay. Al asks if he’ll be there when they get back he says if he’s not, something went wrong. John takes the others up the hill. Luci tells Nick they won’t be gone long.
Morgan reads, and Nick asks what he’s reading. Morgan is silent, and Nick asks for something to eat. Morgan cuts his ties, and tells him get it himself. Nick asks if he isn’t worried. He reaches for Morgan, and Morgan knocks him on his face, saying he’s not worried. (Ah-ha! in Nelson voice.) Nick gets a protein bar, and asks if Morgan likes peanut butter. He gives Morgan half, and introduces himself. Morgan says he’s going up to the road and not to move five feet from the truck. Nick picks up Morgan’s book, The Art of Peace, and flips though it.
Nick looks around the truck, and finds the video camera. He fast-forwards through John’s interview, and stops on Morgan’s. Morgan practices with his pokey stick, but his leg hurts. He sees car racing down the roads, and runs – as fast as he can anyway – back to the truck. He tells Nick to get down. Nick sees the car go past, and grapples with Morgan. They cause the horn to go off. It’s stuck, and just continues to blare. Zombies pop out of everywhere. Nick takes off. Morgan asks Nick to toss him his stick, and Nick runs. I’m annoyed that Nick is leaving injured Morgan to the zombies, so he can chase after a flashy old convertible.
We see a close-up of a zombie. Then a close-up of Al slicing its skull. Luci sees a huge wheel of cable, and thinks it would work. John hopes they can get Al’s truck out by sundown. They drive back in a flatbed truck, carrying the wheel. Victor believes Al’s mission is one of benevolence; they’re alive after an aggressive introduction. He asks if she’s doing it for a reason. She says she wants them to clean up the mess they made. He thinks there’s more to it than that, and she says, their stories. He asks, for who? and she says she doesn’t know how it ends. It might be the only thing left. Victor says there will be no one to see it, and Al says, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that it’s captured. She sees a scar on his hand, and asks what happened and why is he trying to hide it? He asks her again, why? She says, the truth matters. That’s the trade; the truth about him for the flag. He says they’re just words, and she says, more than that. Luci joins them, saying she gets it. She says Al knows her sh*t, except for the sh*t about the truth. Victor says he’ll consider the offer.
Nick runs. He looks into the woods and sees some bluebonnets.
Nick and Madison drive past Mel and the Vulture gang. Ohh, the blue convertible is their car. Mel greets Madison, and tells her it’s slim pickin’s unless you know where to look. Madison says they’ll manage. He’s glad to see Nick is back out again. He tosses The Little Prince into their car, asking Nick to tells his girlfriend that Charlie doesn’t like children’s books. They drive away, and Nick says she didn’t stand a chance. Charlie was never staying with them, no matter what. Madison says they’ll get her back. Nick asks how Madison does it, and she says wherever she goes, she tries to look for something good. A ravioli billboard, an armadillo, a sign that people tried to help each other. She always sees something.
Nick picks a flower. This is one of those episodes where they go back and forth in time. I hate that. If I want to watch that, I’ll watch Once Upon a Time. We hear zombie gurgles. Here they come. Nick whacks them with a hammer, but gets knocked down. One zombie comes close, like a few inches from his face, but Morgan whacks it and stabs it in the head. He tells Nick that they need to find someplace safe, and helps him up.
Morgan and Nick ease on down the road. Nick says the others will wonder what happened, but Morgan says they’ll find them. They come to a town where there are a few zombies toddling around, and they kill them. Nick asks if Morgan is okay. Morgan suggest they sit tight. Nick asks why Morgan helped him, and Morgan says he doesn’t kill.
Madison and Nick find that stinking convertible in front of a church, with a bunch of canned goods in crates in the back. It’s Mel’s brother, Ennis. Nick asks if he’s following them, and Ennis says they were there first. He tells them to get a faster car. Charlie comes out of the church, and Ennis says Mel told them she has a knack for finding the good stuff. Nick tells Charlie that she doesn’t have to listen. Ennis says she wants to. He found her, and taught her how to make it. Nick moves toward Ennis. Madison tells him, now is not the time. Ennis says he keeps his family safe. Nick is on him, holding a knife to his throat. Madison tells him to stop. Ennis is bleeding, and tells Charlie, let’s get out of here.
Morgan tapes his leg. Nick asks if he wants help, and Morgan says he’s got it. Nick tells him to lay off the karate. Morgan tells Nick to stop getting himself in trouble, and its not karate. Nick asks what it is, and Morgan says, just not karate. Nick thinks they should find a car before they come back. Morgan says, the El Camino? telling us what kind of cool car it is. Morgan says it’s not going to work out how Nick thinks, and asks what they did to him. Nick says he bets Morgan has killed, and asks why did he stop? Who did he lose? He says he saw the tape, repeating Morgan’s words; I lose people, then lose myself. Morgan says he’s not telling him. If Nick wants to hunt down the ones who hurt him, it’s his business.
The horn on Al’s truck is still blasting, and zombies crowd around it. They see an arrow made out of sticks on the ground, showing them which way Nick and Morgan went. Al says she’s not leaving, and they won’t find out about the flag; not from her anyway. John says Morgan might need them; it’s just a van. Al says she has things in it, and tells him to go; she’ll be fine. Alicia says they’ll get the van out, and Victor says it’s their act of faith. He tells Luci to go find Nick. Alicia tells Al they’re not going to try anything with two of them out there. Victor says why not just tell them; how did she find those people? Al says she’ll answer all of their questions; let her film them doing what they do. Alicia says, deal. They can turn off this horn any time now.
Alicia gets the zombies’ attention, and picks them off, while Al shoots at the others. Alicia hooks the van up to the flatbed. She crawls underneath the truck, and out the other side. She gets in the cab. Victor starts up the flatbed, and pulls the van out.
Morgan sees Ennis, who tells Morgan to keep walking; there’s nothing for him there. Morgan says Ennis needs to leave, and Ennis says, or what? Ennis sees Nick, and says, holy sh*t! He didn’t think he’d see Nick. Morgan tells Nick to walk away, and Ennis says he should listen to his friend. It’s been good to see him, but he has to get some pimentos back. Unless Nick wants to give him a hand. Nick looks Morgan in the eye, and asks if he’s going to do what it takes to stop him. Morgan steps back, and Nick says, didn’t think so.
Nick tells Madison that Charlie saw everything, but didn’t do anything. He would have been trying to do the right thing, but she did the worst thing. Being out there makes him feel more trapped, like who he’ll be is closing in on him and suffocating him.
Nick jumps Ennis.
Morgan walks away, and keeps going.
Nick and Ennis fight. Ennis cracks Nick in the head with a jar of pimentos.
Morgan is like, dammit, and turns around.
Ennis has a knife a millimeter away from Nick’s eyeball. A deer head has fallen down during their scuffle, and Nick pushes Ennis back onto the antlers, where he’s impaled. That’s not good enough, so Nick pushes on him, until he’s finished. Great. A zombie with a deer head attached to it. Just what everyone needs.
John looks at a downed zombie, and says looks like a stick-based trauma. He asks Luci why Nick was worried she wouldn’t come back, and she says one time she didn’t. Al comes by in the truck. John asks if Luci left because she didn’t love Nick. She says she left, but still loved him.
Morgan finds Nick, his hands drenched in blood. Nick asks what he wants. Morgan says it was his wife, his son, and his friends. That’s who he lost before he lost himself. He knows where Nick is; he was there. He didn’t know how to make it stop, or if he wanted it to. He didn’t think he could find his way out. Then he met someone; a man who didn’t have to help him, but did. The man showed him all life is precious, and it helped; It still dos. Nick asks, how exactly? Morgan takes out the book, and says the books is part of it. Nick says, too late, and Morgan says, believe me, it’s not. He puts the book into Nick’s bloodied hands. He says they can talk about it; talk about anything. Nick takes the book.
Sitting on some steps, Nick reads. Al comes with the others in the truck. Al checks through her tapes. She puts one on top that says, The Bog, along with the dates it was filmed.
Nick puts the book in his pocket, and takes out the bluebonnet. He contemplates it.
Madison drives while Nick navigates. She stops by a field of bluebonnets. Nick lies down in the middle of them.
Nick hears a gunshot. He puts his hand on his chest, and realizes he’s been shot. Charlie stands in front of him with a gun. She backs away, and he falls. Luci and Alicia find him. Charlie disappears. Victor tries to stop the bleeding. Alicia tells him to look at her; it’s going to be fine. That’s highly doubtful, since blood is pouring out of his mouth and he’s gasping for air. Nick tries to talk, but he’s never going to talk again. He’s dead. Victor looks at Luci. Morgan is like, damn, I want my book back. Alicia wails over Nick’s body. Luci cries silently, and Victor holds her.
Nick lies in the bluebonnet field.
Next time, Al does some interviews, Mel asks if Madison wants a weenie (spoiler: she says she’s good), and we see the amusement park.
💬 Funny aside. On Talking Dead, during Nick’s “obituary,” it said no one told him, never look at the flowers. Two of the episode writers were guests, and said they liked the idea, but if it was a reference to Carol in The Walking Dead, it was subconscious. They did add that was one of their favorite episodes though. You decide…
🍑 Tonight, The Real Housewives of Atlanta had a 10th Anniversary special. It was fun to see all the wigs gone by, and the pulling thereof. Also the many noses of Kim and NeNe. What’s with Kim anyway? Why does she seem human on Don’t Be Tardy, and she’s a raving lunatic on Housewives? And was she a cast member without a peach this season? That was confusing. Kim is confusing. And why does she want to look like she’s fifty when she’s barely past thirty? So many questions I will never have answered.
⚓ I’m almost caught up with The Terror, having watched a marathon today. My town had a marathon today too, which bounced me out of bed at the crack of dawn, with the base from a loudspeaker blasting bad music. But that’s another story. The Terror is a cool show – no pun intended. The icy scenery is fabulous though, and makes you feel cold just looking at it. The atmosphere is creepy as hell. Like Ravenous, but on a boat, and without the Civil War and cannibalism. No cannibalism yet anyway. Being out in the middle of frozen nowhere, long before we had radios, is scary enough, but with an unknown entity – they keep saying it’s a bear, but no way it’s a bear – that keeps chopping people in half, it delivers what the title promises. I’m through episode five – I think tomorrow is seven – and in it for the long haul. Or short, or whatever the haul is.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
The Walking Dead
Rick reads Carl’s letter and gazes out the window. Carl talks about his eighth birthday, and other things he remembers from how it used to be. Tears rolls down Rick’s cheeks. It’s not just the stuff that happened, but how Carl felt, special and safe. He thought growing up would mean a family and a job, but it means keeping those you love safe. He wants Rick to feel safe, like he did when Rick held his hand on walks. He doesn’t think the Saviors will surrender, but there’s regular people in there. They’re close to starting over, and have friends now – there have to be more places and people; a chance to make changes and have a real life. If they won’t end it, he has to. He has to find peace and move forward; not forget, but make it so it won’t happen again. Show them they can be safe again without killing, and maybe one day they’ll have birthdays, schools, jobs, and pizza on Friday night, like they used to. Carl tells Rick to take Judith on walks like they had, because she’ll remember. He tells Rick that he loves him. Rick sees Michonne walking hand-in-hand with Judith.
Michonne lies on the bed, pondering. She checks the nightstand. There’s a letter for Negan in the drawer. I’m hoping somehow, Rick and Negan can work together as frenemies. Not just because I think Jeffrey Dean Morgan is nearly everything on this show, but there’s a tremendous amount of story potential there. Please, Walking Dead, don’t blow another opportunity.
Gregory tells Simon that he came back to make amends. Simon is pissed because Gregory made him look like an ass. Gregory says his intel wasn’t current. Juice and momentum can give you a chance in the game. He had it, and did it. Maggie had Hilltop by the nut, and he didn’t know it. He wants to make it right with Negan. Simon tells him that he’s Negan, and not in the collective sense, but he’s assumed control. Negan no longer in the field of play. Gregory calls Simon, the man, and says he knew he could do it. Negan had a big personality, but was too unconventional. Simon is a leader. Simon tells Gregory that’s why he can’t be seen going easy on him. He has the juice and momentum, and wants to keep it. Ergo, Gregory goes. Gregory says the stupid troglodytes at the Sanctuary can’t advise him in community affairs and politics. Simon tells him, it’s ended. Gregory says he’s achieved, survived, and suffered too much. He’s been reborn as a certified sh*t-kicker. It’s not going to end with him wandering into the wilderness with his d*ck in his hand. Gregory says, he is the juice. Simon throws him to the ground. He says he wasn’t going to send Gregory away; he was going to kill him. He asks if Gregory can make coffee, and Gregory says, the best in the land. Simon tells him they’ll start with coffee, and see where it goes. Is this a date?
The Oceanside people go through the woods. Still trying to convince them to fight, Aaron is there, and is so dehydrated and weak, he can barely fight off a zombie. Cyndie says they made their choice. If wants to die in the woods, that’s his.
Eugene shows the Savior ladies the dish he’s made – mac and cheese with sardines – a staple from his college days. It’s a lasting energy source. He eats some, and says it takes him back. It’s all that’s on the menu until the order is complete. He reminds everyone that their lives are on lock. Negan is MIA, and Simon has taken over. They need to be lickety-quick, but he thinks the best they can hope for, is to squeeze out the bare minimum needed to stop Simon from finding out how short they are. Gabriel coughs up a lung, and Eugene tells him to keep his mask on. He either has influenza or cocca-something. Either way, it’s airborne or he would be dead.
He brings a bullet over to Gabriel, and asks him to feel it. Morgan says the imperfection was intentional. He wanted to make it so didn’t work. He doesn’t want anyone to die. Eugene asks if he wants to die, and Gabriel says he doesn’t want to hep him, but does fear death. He thinks maybe it’s God’s way of showing he’s still the same person who locked his parishioners out. He’s still the same scared animal, doing what he can to survive. Eugene tells him to find an unobtrusive corner; he’s off the line. He tells Gabriel to try not to cry too loud. He’s going outside to test rounds not compromised by Gabriel’s chicanery.
Eugene goes outside, and is ambushed by Daryl and Rosita. They spirit him away.
Dwight goes out for a smoke, and hears Negan’s whistle. Negan asks him if he’s surprised. He shouldn’t be. Dwight says they found his car, and Simon thought – Negan cuts him off, telling him it was a real punch in the d*ck (his second favorite word). Rick cornered him with those decomposed a-holes, and Dwight and Simon never showed. He knows what they were thinking, and wants to know if Dwight remembers who he is. He tells Dwight the conversation is just between them. Dwight says, Simon is his number two, and he thought Negan would want him to go by Simon’s call. Dwight says, he’s Negan. Negan says, good; that’s what he likes to hear. He tells Dwight that when time comes, and it will, to remember this talk. Remember what they’ve done, and can still do together. Dwight looks relieved.
In the boardroom, Simon tells Negan that he thought Negan had been killed, and he was gone. Negan polishes Lucille. Simon admits he lacks discipline, and made it personal. That’s why he moved it from infection to extermination at Hilltop. Things went bad, but he owns it, and asks for a pass. He’ll make it up to Negan; he promises. Negan smiles, and ask if Simon remembers when he took this place; when Simon helped him? He wasn’t sure he wanted to keep Simon on board before he had a system in place. Simon had killed all those people in a settlement long ago. People think that’s psychotic sh*t from a demented, broken ghoul. That’s someone you don’t want to work with, let alone stand next to. He figured he’d figure keep an eye on Simon, and everything seemed to work out until this point. He tells Simon he needs him on his knees. Simon gets ready for a bat in the head, but Negan says, all is forgiven. Get his ass up; they’re good. Simon tells Negan that he won’t let him down. Negan says he appreciates the hell out of that.
Negan has a board meeting, and a Savior takes out a map. Negan points, saying this is where they start. They don’t have to take Hilltop, but they’re going to make sure the farmers can’t leave. If they poke their heads out, the Saviors will clip their asses. They’re going to have teams 24/7, sniping them one by one, until they have full contrition. Simon is happy to have Negan back, and Negan says it’s good to be back. Negan tells them clear out, except for Dwight. He wants to kick around some things. I’m sure Dwight thinks one of those things is his head.
Negan tells Dwight he’s smart as hell. No matter what, he didn’t stew or do anything stupid. He just went about the business of getting his. Nothing shook him. He kept his eyes on what could keep him alive and well. He tells Dwight to keep on keeping that sh*t clear. Dwight nods, and Negan smiles.
Eugene suspects he’s alive because they have a nostalgia for comradery, but he’ll give them space until they’re ready to break the ice. Daryl pulls out a large knife, telling Eugene to shut his mouth or he’ll cut Eugene’s tongue out. Rosita tells Daryl to keep on moving; they’re going to be looking for him. Eugene thanks her, and she tells him to shut up. He tells her that she’s the one who told him making bullets would save lives. He thought the crack of a bat would be the last thing he’d hear, and then thought Negan would torture him, but he didn’t. He gave Eugene a chance to live. Rosita says everyone who has died since then is on him. He says Rick pushed to take the Savior’s home. Rosita pulls out her gun, calling him a selfish coward and a traitor. He turned his back on the friends he had, and didn’t give a rat’s ass about them. They’re going to stick him in the darkest hole, and the only time he’ll come out is when need him to teach them something. He’ll get his wish and live, but they’ll be forcing him to do something useful with his pathetic life.
Dwight writes things on the map. There’s a knock at the door, and he hides everything. It’s Simon, who says, it went well. The status quo has been re-achieved. He asks why Dwight was held back, and Dwight says, for a pep talk. Simon tells him they need to have a serious talk with others who are less than thrilled with the current management. It saddens him, but the time has come to gather like-minded individuals to gather strength, and do what need to do. He tells Dwight to think about what Negan has done to him. Everything he’s extracted; every indignity. He knows what he has to do. They’re meeting in the courtyard after rounds, and going to begin what’s next. Dwight says, all right, and Simon grabs his shoulders, and says, yes, my boy. Well, if it was a tossup I don’t think I’d pick Simon.
Daryl shoots some zombies with arrows. While the zombies are being a distraction, Eugene sticks his fingers down his throat, and makes himself throw up on Rosita. Considering what he ate, that’s pretty disgusting, but she barely flinches. He takes off, and she shoots at him, but he gets through a hole in a fence. She and Daryl follow. Rosita says they can’t let him get back, and suggests they blow his head off. As soon as they pass, Eugene comes out from under a pile of ashes and mess.
Aaron is sleeping in the woods. It starts to rain, and he gets some water from a can nearby. He hears zombie sounds, and takes out his knife. It’s a mean-looking one, and he pikes it in the head. If we were in a 42nd Street movie theatre, I’d yell, look out behind you! Another zombie grabs him, and they fall together. Aaron loses the knife, and the zombie grabs at his legs. He manages to kick its brain out of its head, but here comes another one. The knife is lost, but he grabs a pokey stick, and skewers it. Yet one more comes, knocking him down, and it’s inches from his face only separated from him by the stick. He gets the upper hand, and beats the non-living crap out of it with the stick. He lies there, rain pouring down, surrounded by the now dead undead.
Someone asks if he’s dead. It’s the Oceansiders. He says they left him. It’s what the Saviors turned them into. They lie, they don’t trust, and don’t live the way they want because of the Saviors. The Saviors hurt them, and will keep on hurting them, unless they do one thing – fight. They just look at him vacantly, and I’m thinking this group seriously lacks personality. Give them a personality or get rid of them.
Commercial break. Red Machete is still not happening for me.
Dwight waits in the courtyard. The others come out, Gregory among them. Simon tells them that if they’re here right now, they’re in. They can talk about approaches and finesses, but they’re in; no take backs. They need to make it quick, quiet, and respectful. Negan has done a lot for them, and deserves it. He says Dwight has legit personal issues with Negan, so the kill is his if he wants it. Something quiet – not a knife, that’s too personal. Maybe a silencer. Then they’ll set a break to start healing. The destruction of Hilltop and its people, and then get on with their lives. He says, right, Dwight?
We hear whistling, and I literally lol. Negan says he’ll take it from here. He says, three… two… one… There are gunshots, and the renegade Saviors drop, save for Gregory, Simon, and Dwight. Two Saviors come out for Simon. Simon lunges at Negan, who says there’s the Simon he knows. He’s coming at him, instead of doing that backstabbing bullsh*t. He asks, why? After everything he did for Simon. He killed the garbage people, when Negan specifically told him not to do that. He pounds on one of the dead Saviors with Lucille. He says after all this, him being him, he’s still going to give Simon his share. If you want to be the man, you got to beat the man. If he can do that, then hell, he should be the man.
Inside everyone gathers. Simon blathers about how they have to get to work when this is done, and how he didn’t want this, but the Sanctuary must stand. As he’s talking, he catches Negan off-guard with a punch. He gets his bearings, and they fight. I’m just a little worried, since Negan is wearing his leather jacket, which probably isn’t a good idea. Negan gives Simon a head-butt. Simon goes down, and Negan kicks him in the face. Gregory inches away. Dwight grabs him, and tells him to get out now. He gives Gregory a map, telling him to give it to Rick. It’s about tomorrow, and the only move they’ve got. He hands Gregory some car keys. Hopefully, he won’t just keep driving.
Negan straddles Simon, strangling him. Finally, he lies still. Negan gets up, and says, what an a-hole. I realize my mouth is open. The crowd was certainly quiet about it. I have to admit, I’ll be glad I won’t have to work around writing Simon says anymore.
Gregory is shoved into the pen at Hilltop. Maggie gives the map to Rick. End Negan, end the risk, is written on it, along with something about where they’ll be. Maggie asks what they’re going to do.
Negan tells Dwight that Simon was a d*ckless worm. What else could he do but crush his throat? But what was bad for Simon, is good for him. They’ve had their ups and downs, but he’s always been able to count on Dwight. He’d like Dwight to be his right-hand man, if he’ll accept the promotion. Dwight agrees. He wants to help Negan finish things with Rick. Negan tells him not to sell himself short. He already has.
Laura, who knew Dwight was a traitor, is in his room. Negan says he found her on the side of the road. She says in Alexandria, he killed their team. She ran and kept running. She wanted to expose him for the scum weasel he is. Negan says it makes sense. He told RIck when to attack, and how to get to the outpost. He’s been slipping workers guns, and maybe even lied about Shari. He thinks he’s some sort of hero, but he’s a nobody and way over his head. When he said Dwight comes through when he’s needed, he meant it. He knew he could count on him delivering the plan to Rick – the brilliant fake-ass plan. He used Gregory. Negan thought he’d take a field trip, but he got a delivery boy; good for him. All that intel will lead them directly into the line of fire. They won’t know what hit them, all thanks to his new right-hand man. He’d thought about killing him, but that was too dignified for a backstabbing, double-crossing dirtbag. Negan says he has plans for Dwight, and laughs.
Looking all angry and rumpled, Eugene tells the workers that they have to prepare to protect the Sanctuary. Negan is back, and they’re going to finish Hilltop. A messenger tells him Negan needs the bullet order by tomorrow. He says to give Negan his personal congratulations on his return. His request will be filled in its entirety, and on time. If he needs bullets, he’s going to get them. All of them. They’re going to rise to the occasion, and will change Savior history forever. He tells Gabriel, all hands on deck. He’s going to be sorting shells. Follow his lead, or cry and die. He says, here we go. He quotes Rosita, saying, time to do something useful with their pathetic lives.
Yay! Simon is a zombie chained to the fence. He’s a good one too; a snapping maniac. Negan is on the deck, and Michonne radios him from a rooftop nearby. He asks if Rick is with her, and to put him on. She says this isn’t about Rick; it’s about Carl. Carl wrote him a letter, and she’s delivering it because that’s what he wanted. Negan says he can’t promise not to kill the messenger, and she tells him, shut up and listen. She reads.
Carl tells Negan that he was helping someone, and got bit. Now he’s gone. Negan might be gone, but he doesn’t think so. He wonders if Negan is working on a way out. Maybe got out. Maybe he thinks it’s a lost cause, and wants to kill them all. He wishes he could have asked if Negan feels that he has to be who he is. If this is what he wanted or wished he could have. The way out is forgiveness. There doesn’t have to be a fight. He hopes his dad offers peace, and he takes it. He hopes things can change. It did for him. He can still start over. Negan listens to every word so thoughtfully, I want to cry.
Negan says, there is no getting out of it now. He wouldn’t accept surrender if they were on their knees. Winning isn’t about beating them, but killing every last one of them. That is starting over. He never wanted this. Rick made it happen. Tell him that. No more talk. He throws the radio down and stomps on it, along with my storyline dreams.
Next week – both the finale of The Walking Dead (at 9 pm), and the premiere of Fear the Walking Dead (at 10 pm). Morgan tells Rick to finish it, the Saviors attack, and Dwight is sent to Jaundice Jadis. I can’t wait to see Fear, since they’re setting up camp in an amusement park. Abandoned amusement parks are creepy all on their own. Add zombies, and you can’t lose.
🍹 A Quick Wives Note…
🍑 The Real Housewives of Atlanta know how to pour on the glam. It was part one of their reunion, and Porsha went full-on princess with a tiara, mammoth jeweled earrings, and a blue velvet gown. Although she claimed to be a goddess because she’s grown. The earrings were all huge, sparkly, and fabulous. Only Kandi was slightly lower key with the accessories, but made up for it with the bling on her gown. NeNe was in red lace and fringe. Kenya was in a frilly yellow explosion. She confirmed her pregnancy, but she never did actually say, I’m pregnant, which made me wonder if the bun is in someone else’s oven. Cynthia had the most glamorous, Rapunzel-like side ponytail ever, and was wearing a red gown fit for a quinceañera. Marlo joined them swathed in lavender cotton candy. Only Sheree was a bit of a disappointment. Her gigantic emerald earrings passed, but she was covered all the way to her chin in a gown of silken material that did not look good on film. She said it was Gucci. Was it his nun period? I wondered if her new felon man doesn’t want her showing any skin. A viewer even pointed out that she seemed unusually covered up this season.
🏰 The Real Housewives of Potomachas mostly centered around Karen’s tax issues, since apparently her husband owes the government. They moved out of the neighborhood, although her idea of downsizing isn’t like the average person’s idea. I guess now they only have 6000 square feet and one pool. What blew my mind though, were the rest of them demanding answers from her like it was their right to know. I’m not a huge fan of Karen’s, but they were like a pack of vultures.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Alexis meets Finn. He shows her parking tickets. She says, hi, Alexis, how are you? He says, hi, and asks how to fix this. She can’t believe he got so many in three weeks, and parked in a handicapped spot. He tells her about helping an old lady with her groceries in the snow, and being invited in for tea. He was all of fifteen minutes, and when he came out, had the tickets. She asks if he has medical plates, and he says he does. She tells him that she’s expensive, but he says he’d rather pay her than pay the man. She tells him no one says that anymore, and he says he’s bringing it back. She’ll try to make the tickets disappear if he makes their fake relationship go away.
Griff looks over an anonymous letter to Jordan, saying that Peter is Henrik and she should investigate. Anna walks in, and says he’s been keeping secrets.
Lulu goes to Peter’s office. She tells him she’s working on something, and could use his help. She needs assistance in atoning for Nathan’s death.
Nina sees Maxie at the hospital. Since she was late for work, Nina checked Maxie’s calendar, and she had an appointment. She can’t believe she forgot and didn’t put it on her own calendar. Maxie says she didn’t forget; she didn’t tell her.
Spinelli gives Jason a fat manila envelope, telling him everything he needs is in there. He says it’s prudent to prepare for every eventuality, however remote it is. Jason says Spinelli should be with his daughter, but he says she’s already back in Portland. She doesn’t understand the situation, but comprehends the importance of coming through for friends. He tells Jason if he’s successful, Sam won’t feel obligated to be with Drew and can follow her heart. Jason says he’s going to a lot of trouble for something that already happened. Sam and Drew broke up.
Sam drops by Drew’s office. He didn’t think she was coming in when he saw she’s cleared her schedule. She says she came to say goodbye.
Peter asks if Lulu hasn’t made any inroads with Maxie. Lulu tells him that they were both invited to a gathering, and Maxie didn’t even make eye contact. Peter says she’s grieving, and will eventually realize Faison killed Nathan, not her. Lulu says she’s the one who brought him to Port Charles, but Peter says he shares that responsibility for encouraging her. He’ll do what he can to help. She hoped he’d say that, and asks if he can get her an advance copy of The Severed Branch. He asks what she’s going to do with it, and she says, expose Henrik.
Nina tells Maxie that she gets it; hormonal forgetfulness. Maxie asks, what if it didn’t slip her mind? Nina says, an appointment without her birthing coach and sister-in-law? Is Maxie over her or something?
Finn asks which part of their relationship Alexis wants to disappear, and she says, the romantic part. She didn’t think her life was any of Julian’s business, and thought he’d stop dogging her. She’d rather be honest than find herself having to explain how everything isn’t related to her feelings for him.
Anna tells Griff that she was making an appointment, and thought she’d pop into the lounge to see if she could persuade him to stay with her. A little bird told her he’d already moved to better digs. He says, Amy. Anna says Amy told her that he’s living with Ava. He tells Anna that his apartment was condemned. It sped thing things up, but he’s really just a guest. She asks if he’s sleeping in the guest room. He says he sees her hunt for Henrik hasn’t distracted her from her mother hen tendencies. She says apparently, her concern was unwarranted, and Griff says, enough about him; how is the search going? She explains she’s working with Jason, and they both have leads. Griff says from what he’s heard, Jason is a killer. Anna believes he’s selective about his targets. In her profession, he’s considered an asset. He asks if she’s willing to stand aside and let him kill Henrik.
Spinelli asks Jason, what led to this welcome occurrence? Jason tells him that he and Sam were trapped in the earthquake. Spinelli interrupts, asking if when they made it out, they confessed their depthless, passionate, abiding love. Jason says Sam said she loves him, but she also loves Drew. She has to be honest about what’s going on with her, and when she told Drew, he left her.
Drew asks if Sam is really leaving Port Charles. She says for a few days, maybe a week. She needs time to figure things out and clear her head; she’s leaving in a few hours. He asks what about the kids, and she says she’s taking Danny. If it’s okay, she’d like to take Scout, but she doesn’t want to make assumptions. He says he doesn’t know if it’s his place to ask anymore, but is Jason going?
Nina asks Maxie if she did something wrong. Maybe she’s not good enough. Maxie she’s doing everything. It means world to her that Nina cares. She doesn’t know what she’d do without her. She loves Nina; they’re sisters. She just needs space right now. Nina asks if she’s been smothering Maxie, and Maxie says no, but sometimes when she looks at Nina, all she sees is Nathan.
Lulu tells Peter that she already cleared the story with her editor. He asks what she needs the book for, and she says maybe she can find a lead or research the material. She thought he might be able to snag a review copy. Peter says he has one already, and asks if she’s sure she wants to do this. It could destroy any chance of reconciliation.
Griff asks if Anna leads Jason to Henrik, won’t she feel responsible for his death? She says she won’t let that happen. Griff says their goals are different. Isn’t there anyone else she can trust? She thinks about Finn telling her that she saved his life. She says no one she’d risk getting hurt.
Alexis tells Finn that her sobriety was easier when she lied. Sometimes a fib can be useful. He says she is a lawyer. He’s concerned that taking the high road with Julian will end up dragging her down. He says, when there’s a lie, make it the truth. She tells him she doesn’t speak fortune cookie. He says she told Julian they were serious, so let’s be serious.
Maxie asks if Nina doesn’t feel the same way, seeing Nathan when she looks at her. They’re close, and she’s grateful, but with closeness comes something else. Nina says, sadness. She feels it too; she’s just trying to make her happy and make everything better. Maxie says Bobbie told her, no one person can do that; only time. Nina asks where do they go from here? It feels like she’s getting dumped. She asks if Maxie wants to be left alone, but Maxie says, not at all. Just a little less time. Maybe four nights a week instead of six. Nina says, five, and Maxie says it works for her. They hug. Maxie tells Nina that she couldn’t get through this without her. Nina says Mac and Felicia had better pick up the slack, and Maxie says, they will. She also has Spinelli, Bobbie, and Peter. Nina says Peter is her boss. Maxie says Peter is a friend who happens to be her boss. She tells Nina about him crashing at her place, and explains that it’s important for her to spend time with people who aren’t so connected. Nina says she just wants Maxie and the baby to be happy. Maxie says, one day they will be.
Peter tells Lulu that the last time she tracked down a mystery, it blew up in her face. She says this time it isn’t to catch anyone, but unmask them, so someone else can catch them. She doubts Maxie will forgive her, but it might give her some measure of peace. If it wasn’t for Henrik, Nathan would be alive. Peter says she’s making assumptions. What if he’s only guilty of being Faison’s son? Lulu says, then that’s the story she’ll write. Peter gives her the book, and tells her to keep him in the loop If she finds something, he wants to hear about it.
Alexis asks if Finn wants her to take a lie, and make it the truth by really having a relationship. He’s not suggesting moving in, but they both hate the word dating. She says seeing each other doesn’t work, and going out sounds like high school. He says if they choose to elevate the relationship, they’ll find a new adult word. She says it wouldn’t be horrible, and they don’t mind each other’s company. She’ll check her calendar. He says, in the meantime, and points out the tickets. She asks if he knows it’s the same bade number on all of them. That means they were issued by the same officer. Finn takes the tickets, saying never mind; he’ll deal with it himself. He has free time now that he’s not bringing down drug dealers with Anna. He leaves, and he and Anna literally bump into each other as she’s walking in. Anna goes to the bar, and makes a phone call. Alexis watches her.
Jason tells Spinelli about going to the pier, and getting into a fight with Drew. Spinelli says that’s not like him. He’s normally cool and collected to a fault. He’s never seen Jason fight unless someone else throws the first punch. Jason says he cops arrested both of them. Sam came to the station to pay Drew’s fine. He left, she stayed, and they had a chance to talk. Spinelli says, about? Jason thinks back Sam wanting to find out who she is, and the possible reality of ending up without wither of them. Jason says for the first time since he came back, it feels like Sam is making her own decisions, and following her own instincts. Underneath, she’s starting to trust herself again. Spinelli asks if they talked about future plans, and Jason says she was thinking about taking Danny and Scout on a trip. When she comes back, it’s for her to figure out. Spinelli has to get to the airport. He says if he’s successful, he’ll come back with what they want. If he fails – he pats the envelope – the contingency plan is in Jason’s hands.
Sam tells Drew that she needs time by herself to figure things out. He gets it, and she thanks him for understanding. He says they have a lot to discuss when she gets back. He doesn’t know if it’s too soon or inappropriate, but they have to figure out how to divvy up everything they worked so hard to build.
Anna talks on the phone to Frisco, saying Obrecht told her that Faison raised Henrik. She’s looking for his last known whereabouts, and if Obrecht was with Faison at that time. She hasn’t turned up anything regarding boarding schools. Alexis approaches her, and she tells Frisco to hold on. Alexis says she’d like to have a chat when it’s convenient. Anna asks if it’s quick. Alexis says it doesn’t need to be, and to call her about Finn. Anna tells Frisco that she’ll call back.
Chase finds Finn at the hospital, and says he sees Finn got his messages. Finn says it’s harassment. Chase says he calls, but Finn doesn’t pick up, and there’s no response. Finn tears the tickets up, and says, here’s a response. Chase tells him destroying the tickets doesn’t make them go away. He just wants some of Finn’s time. Why is that objectionable?
Lulu sits at Kelly’s lunch counter. Jason sees her with the book. He says he didn’t know it was ready for publication. Lulu says she borrowed an advance copy from Peter.
Peter plays with a Zippo lighter. He thinks about Maxie telling him how she got through the night because she wasn’t alone. Maxie asks if she’s interrupting, but Peter says he’s just daydreaming. He tells her that she looks rested. She says she is, and he’s glad to hear it. She asks if he’s glad he doesn’t have to scrunch on her couch again. He asks if she’s feeling smothered. She tells him that Nina tracked her down at the hospital. She’d checked Maxie’s personal calendar and found out she had an appointment. Maxie had to let her know she purposely didn’t tell her, but thinks they had a good talk.
Nina stomps around the hospital, and remembers Peter going to the appointment with Maxie. She flashes back to when Peter and Maxie made up the story about his vasectomy, and when they were picking up food at the MetroCourt. She starts kicking the wall. Griff tells her she’s going to break her foot, and she says she’d rather break Peter’s face instead.
Sam agrees she and Drew have a lot to sort out. There’s also the custody of Scout. He says he doesn’t want to fight, and they both talk at once. He guesses there’s really not a whole lot to discuss. The apartment is hers and everything it. She says what about the company? It’s theirs.
Jason says Henrik finished the book, and Lulu says PK Sinclair did, but if they’re right, he’s Henrik. She hasn’t read it yet, but from the inside flap, she got that the hero was under the thumb of his cruel, repressive father, and is out for revenge. Jason says he had the original, unfinished copy, and Spinelli wrote a program to predict the end of the book, but it would help to see the real ending. She hands him the book, and says, be my guest.
Peter tells Maxie that he isn’t surprised Nina took it so well. She’s a generous, loving person. Maxie says his name was brought up, and Peter gets that Nina is protective. Maxie says she doesn’t need to be, and she tried to convey that. He asks how that went, and she thinks it went well. Nina isn’t thrilled that they’re friends, but is understanding that he’s not a threat. She doesn’t think Nina will get in the way of their friendship.
Griff ices Nina’s foot. He guesses she’s not a fan of Peter’s. She asks what he knows about Peter, and Griff says he helps Drew and Sam run Aurora. Nina wonders how he’s in town this long and all they know is what he does for a living and that he’s a good friend. Griff tells her that she’s saying it like it’s a fault. She says it is when the object of his friendship is an expectant mother and widow leaning on him too hard. She thinks there’s something they don’t know.
Chase says he’s seen more of Finn in the last three days than the past ten years. Finn says he’s spent the bulk of that arresting him, and it’s harassment. Chase says he just wants to know Finn. Why doesn’t Finn show him around? He doesn’t know anyone and gets lonely. Finn hears there’s an app for that. Chase suggests they get a drink, but Finn says he doesn’t drink. Chase says he should know that, but doesn’t. Can’t brothers do better? Finn says they can, but not these two.
Alexis says she and Anna have to talk, since she and Finn have gotten closer. Anna says she’s been deep into an investigation, and isn’t on top of the social calendar. Alexis says she and Finn are good friends, and she’s fine with keeping it there if it would be getting in the way of something he and Anna have. Anna thinks if she and Finn have something, they wouldn’t be having this conversation. They agree they respect each other, and Alexis asks if Finn is available. Anna tells her to ask him, but Alexis thinks she should ask Anna, and repeats the question.
Peter tells Maxie that their friendship could be construed as a conflict of interest, since he’s her boss. In the hallway, Griff listens in. He’s getting good at that. She says he’s Nina’s boss, and Nina is her boss. He says she’s also Maxie’s sister-in-law. Maxie says she’s known for speaking her mind, and doesn’t hold things back. She doesn’t think their friendship is a problem, and told Nina it’s valuable and she has to respect that. Maxie leaves, and Griff looks worried. His main talent.
Nina calls Curtis. She tells him she wants to hire him for a priority investigation.
Anna tells Alexis that she doesn’t need to ask for permission. Alexis thinks she does. They’re not dating, just getting to know each other better. Anna says, by dating. Alexis asks if it’s a problem for her, and Anna says it would only be a problem if she didn’t make him happy. Alexis says that’s a tall order; he’s not exactly bubbling with joy. Anna says, it’s fine; have at it, and good luck. She leaves, and Alexis puzzles over this.
Chase says Finn doesn’t make it easy. They have the same father; it must count for something. Finn says he was gone before Chase was in the picture. They had no relationship then, and there’s no reason to have one now. he gets in the elevator, and the door closes.
Drew asks if Sam thinks they can work together and not be together. She says they don’t have to figure it out now. She doesn’t trust making a giant life decision after another one; she needs time to think. He says it’s fine. She tells him that she has a plane to catch. He tells her to be safe, and she says, him too.
Lulu tells Jason she already inquired, and PK Sinclair has little or no contact with the publishing company. Everything was finalized by email. He has to get paid, so maybe they should follow the money. She asks if the ending matches, and Jason says there are some variations. In the epilogue, he says all that’s left of his father is him. That, and a memento he took before their final goodbye; a lighter. He knew the day might come when he’d burn his own life down, as he brought his father’s to ashes.
Peter plays with the lighter. Griff knocks at the door. Peter asks if there’s a problem, and Griff says, you could say that. Peter wonders if there was a mistake on his test results, and Griff says there was a problem with the paperwork – his name. He wrote Peter August, but that’s a lie. His name is Henrik Faison.
Tomorrow, Franco knows what to do, Griff wants Peter to turn himself in, and Nina wants Curtis to investigate Peter.
Vanderpump Rules
The girls head to the beach early. Stassi says life is better today. She actually got some sleep after taking a sleeping pill. Kristen says she came in at 8:30, and Stassi didn’t even wake up. Katie tells Kristen that the guys said she and James hooked up.
Twelve hours earlier…
At a club, Jax is angry with Scheana for showing Brittany there are guys other than him. James invades the DJ booth and tries to explain house music. In his interview, he says he’s never without a thumb drive with music on it. He says, it’s a See You Next Tuesday Mexican edition. Or as I would call it, a James takeover. In his interview, Jax admits James is good at getting the party started and turning it up. In her interview, Kristen says James has the potential to be really talented, and does a great job as DJ. Lala says he slays life. Apparently, these people don’t get out as much as they claim to. Kristen tells James that she’s fun, and that they’ve dated. He’s confused, since he knows she’s fun, because they dated. Stassi thinks it’s freaking weird seeing them drinking and laughing together, and we flash back to some hateful moments between them. Kristen says their time together reminds her of a bad mushroom trip, and James drinks some more. The group heads out. Jax has a bottle of vodka in his pants. Some things never change. Jax is one of them.
In the morning, both Kristen and James’s beds are empty. Jax tells Brittany that Scheana is bullsh*t, trying to set her up on a date. He doesn’t go to Rob and tell him to explore other options. He says Kristen has to be kept at arm’s reach, because she’ll talk sh*t behind your back. He tells Brittany about seeing Kristen and James drinking in the pool at 7 am. She’s not believing they hooked up, but he tells her to look at the pillows. In his interview, he presents the evidence of the case. He tells Brittany about James grabbing a bottle of tequila and finding the pillows – the smoking gun – oddly arranged later. He knows what he saw. Brittany says if he’d put half the effort of this reenactment into their relationship, they’d be fine.
Giggy! Ken brings a dog to Lisa. Her name is Monroe, and someone dumped her at the rescue center; they didn’t want her anymore. I can’t even imagine that. Lisa says she can’t have another dog, and he suggests just a few days. She says some of their strays are doing well. Look at James, and how well he’s doing. There’s hope for lost causes. Her personal rule is not falling in love with every stray and bringing it home. She thinks Monroe should meet other people. She doesn’t like the name Monroe, but Ken says she can’t change it unless she’s going to keep her. She thinks she might be in trouble.
Tom drinks I-don’t-know-what the second he gets up. Ariana says he has the most on point golf outfit of all time. He says he might suck at golf, but he’ll look good doing it. Schwartz tells Katie he’s going golfing. In his interview, he says last night is a blur. He remembers tequila shots, James shirtless, penis flutes, dancing, and kissing Katie. From there, he doesn’t know what happened, and he’s not feeling too good.
Lala receives roses from her boyfriend with a note saying he loves and misses her. She asks if Rob gives Scheana flowers, but Scheana says she’s not a flower person. Lala asks what kind of gifts he gives, and she says she doesn’t like gifts; she prefers affection to presents. In her interview, Lala says Scheana still feels the need to pretend when they all know it. She’s not getting affection or gifts. Lala says her man loves giving gifts. Scheana says she doesn’t need all that; she’s simple. Lala sucks on her baby bottle, and we both refrain from making jokes.
Jax says he’ll be happy just to get the ball on the tee. James says he and Schwartz are wasted. They were drinking until sunrise, and still are. These guys golf worse than I do, and I suck. Tom says he’s golfed on many courses, but they’ve all been the miniature kind. Schwartz and James stay in the carts, while the other three drive holes into the lawn. James drives off the road, and Peter tells him that he can’t do that. In response, James gives him the finger and crashes into another cart. Jax says they’re a motley crew. James couldn’t find the hole if a shiny arrow pointed to it. Jax tells the guys about his theory on Kristen and James, saying they weren’t braiding each other’s hair at that hour in the hot tub. Tom asks James if he knows how Kristen is today.
He asks if James hooked up with Kristen, but in his drunken state, James interprets it as hanging out, and says, maybe a little bit, but not really. Jax says they were destined to be friends. Tom asks if they brought cushions to the hot tub. James says no, but Jax has pictures. James accuses Jax of focusing on him because his own relationship is in turmoil. Peter says they have two deflectors, deflecting against each other. Jax shows James a cushion picture, and James says he took a nap. In his interview, James defines hanging out versus hooking up, and says the latter didn’t happen. James tells them his girlfriend is sexy AF, and about to be Miss USA. I try to figure this out, since she’s from Australia. He claims he’s never cheated on her. He says Jax hurt his feelings, and everyone laughs. Jax says no one will narc on him, and just be honest. James says Jax is bringing him back to an old place, and he doesn’t like the bullying. Jax calls him hungover and emotional. In his interview, James says he woke up in a Mexico in a hellhole of lies. He’s upset Jax would do this to him, after he outed Scheana trying to get Brittany interested in another guy. He gets all weepy.
Brittany and Scheana get massages. Scheana tells Brittany that Tom was pissed about her trying to set up Brittany with Adam. Brittany says Jax wouldn’t leave her alone, but she’s glad he feels insecure. In her interview, Scheana says after what Jax did, she’s glad to set Brittany up with someone else. Brittany tells her about Jax claiming James and Kristen hooked up. Scheana says Carter will be pissed if he finds out.
Kristen doesn’t remember last night totally, but viva la Mexico.
Ariana and Lala join Scheana and Brittany at the spa. Ariana didn’t get to bed until 7 am. Brittany says she passed out while everyone was still in her suite. Lala says Kristen and James seemed to be connecting. Brittany says it was only them and a pillow left at the end. Lala wonders if there was kissy-kissy. Scheana is sure Carter must have been happy about the shirtless James Snapchat. In her interview, Lala believes something happened, instructing us that once a hole has been entered, it’s easy to have reentry. She said this, not me.
At the TomTom site, Lisa discusses logistics with handyman Santi, who says it looks good. Wearing a pink hardhat, Lisa goes up on a lift. Ken arrives, and isn’t thrilled about her being up there. Lisa says the bar isn’t sexy yet, but will be. It’s starting to feel like a bar. It will be an unusual combo; romantic industrial. She talks about having velvet booths juxtaposed with steel. Ken says she’s stuck on the building site, and Lisa says she’s having fun. They talk about the kids being in Mexico. Lisa is waiting for Brittany to see the light. Ken says she’s a girl from the country and he’s a man of the world, although that wouldn’t be my term for him. Lisa feels an analogy coming on, and says she wouldn’t have put up with that kind of bullsh*t. In her interview, she says Ken owned clothing shops where women came to get dressed, and wine bars where women came to get undressed. She tells Ken she would never have put up with him stealing or shagging one of her friends.
We’re back to the beginning on the beach. Katie tells Kristen that when Schwartz came back from golfing, he said James told him they hooked up. Stassi tells Kristen that she can’t put herself in these situations. She asks Kristen if she blacked out, and Kristen says, don’t you dare, but Stassi says it’s happened before. Kristen says she’d never, ever, ever, ever cheat on Carter. Stassi reminds her that she lied for an entire summer about hooking up with Jax. We flash back to that, and I shudder. Kristen says she won’t have sh*t made up about her. In her interview, Stassi says she’d be an idiot not to ask questions. She tells Kristen that they’re not the bad guys. In her interview, Kristen says she’s grown since then. She tells them she’s about to knock someone’s ass out. Yep. Totally grown.
The rest of the group arrives, minus James, who’s sleeping it off. Kristen says, let’s effing talk, and asks if James said they hooked up. Jax tells her that’s what he said. Tom says James told them maybe a little bit. Tom says that Schwartz did a disappearing act. Schwartz says he ended up in a different resort, but he’s not sure how he got there. The workers brought him back. Katie says his not knowing where he was concerns her. In her interview, she says he’s still going to the point of blacking out, and has a lot at stake – his marriage and TomTom. She doesn’t want him to jeopardize that. He says he almost remembers everything. Katie tells him that he’s not drinking for the rest of the day. Stassi suggests he act like a bar owner.
James is still lying in bed, and Peter asks how it’s going. He says he’s feeling better, and Peter notices the open bottle of vodka next to the bed. James asks where Peter went, and Peter tells him, the beach, where James and Kristen were the topic. He tells James about what Jax said, and James says Jax is obviously insecure, and gets joy out of other people’s relationships crumbling. If he’s spreading rumors, Kristen must be livid. Peter says she was.
It’s suit night, but Jax is passing on polyester; it’s 110 degrees outside. James texts Kristen not to listen to that nutcase saying he’s done anything; it’s a lie. She thinks it’s a lame attempt James fitting in with the guys at her expense. Stassi tells her not to be impulsive.
Tom is pissed off, since he went to the effort of getting short suits for the guys. Now Jax and Schwartz won’t wear them. I have news for him. I don’t know anyone who would wear them, and if I was a guy, I wouldn’t wear them. Tom is wearing a leopard print pair of knee-length shorts and a leopard short-sleeved jacket, with a matching tie and white shirt. Jax says it’s so awful, it’s awesome, but its 800 degrees. I’d say it’s just awful, and he’s probably exaggerating about the heat. James compares Kristen to a Venus fly trap. You get caught and stuck, and have to pretend you’re dead, then slowly leave. They sit down at a restaurant for dinner, and Schwartz tells Brittany he wants food from Chili’s. He’s been drinking all day, he’s barely alive, and needs hangover food. He’s not craving ceviche, but the unlimited breadsticks sound good.
In her interview, Stassi tells us that she and Patrick are in a text fight. She forgot to text him when she got there, but doesn’t want to be on the phone fighting in Mexico. She says she hasn’t FaceTimed with him since he got mad at her. Why FaceTime with someone who’s just going to yell at her? Brittany tells Kristen that James said it, and everyone heard it. Kristen says he’s going down.
James claims that’s not what he said. Kristen tells him that Brittany claims he definitely did. Tom stands up, thanks Brittany, and wishes another happy birthday to Jax. He hopes they can all come and see where he and Schwartz are at with TomTom. They all toast. Kristen wants to make a toast next. She says, cheers to TomTom, thanks Brittany, and wishes Jax a happy birthday for the fourteen-millionth time. She adds that James said she hooked up with him, and James tells her that he never said that. She says four people here say he did. Tom says he told them, maybe a little. James is adamant that he didn’t say that. Jax tells him to own it. Schwartz chimes in, and James is annoyed that he’s getting ganged up on by the old men. In his interview, a lot is bleeped, but he calls both Jax and Brittany fat, which makes me scowl at the TV. I don’t care what he says about Jax, but he has no business commenting on Brittany at all. Kristen wants to throw him across the room. Katie is like, no, you can’t do that. In her interview, Katie says she’s not sympathetic to people who act like children. I hear you, Katie. Kristen says James is exactly who she thought he was. He says he doesn’t give a flying what she thinks. Stassi says he should, and he doesn’t give one about her opinion either. He calls Kristen an attention seeker, and tells her to shut up. Kristen throws a drink at him. Lala is like, wtf?, since half the drink went on her, and jumps up. James calls Kristen white trash, and walks out; Lala following. In her interview, Lala says it’s the lowest of low to throw a drink. She’s pushed people down, but never throws a margarita with salt, because she’s not a bitch. I don’t even know what to say, except I guess that makes sense to her. James insists if he said anything, it was a joke. These people need to stop drinking to blackout level. Or just stop drinking.
Next time, Lala gets an injury from her baby bottle, Kristen tells Carter about the James rumor, Jax confronts Adam, and Lisa tells Jax to leave.
🍑 A Halloween/Eva’s birthday party happened on The Real Housewives of Atlanta. I love a costume party, and the ladies did not disappoint. The venue was impressive – a decommissioned church, and all of the costumes were fabulous. I gave the award for Most Amusing to NeNe and Gregg, who went as an exterminator and roach, respectively. If you’re out of the Atlanta loop, this was in answer to Kim’s posting a video of several water bugs in NeNe’s newly renovated bathroom. They keep calling them roaches, but after twenty years in New York, I know what a roach is, and we call the gargantuan ones from the South, water bugs. In Florida, they’re palmetto bugs. We did occasionally get them in NYC, but they’re about 65,000 times bigger than the average roach there. And they fly. Sorry. I didn’t mean to get off on a roach tangent, but it’s irritated me that Kim is intimating NeNe does not keep a clean house, when that has nothing to do with these mammoth mofos. Anyway, Kim was not down with this humor, once again hanging a question mark over my head. How is this nasty, petty, humorless woman the same one joking around with chef Tracey, and running from possums, on Don’t Be Tardy? It’s like she’s two different people. She and Kroy came as a Playboy bunny and Hef, btw. I loved Kandi’s costume as well. She was the clown from It, but in a white lacey confection. Holding a red balloon, she looked both pretty and pretty scary. Next time, the reunion. Porsha wearing a tiara ought to be worth the price of admission.
🏨 No pun intended, but I highly recommend Abandoned on Viceland. Professional skateboarder, Rick McCrank, finds abandoned places to display his talents, but the show is much more than that. It’s rich in history of the local areas, and the places themselves. All of the episodes are constantly in rotation, but my favorite is the first one, Ghost Mall, where Rick tours northeastern Ohio, mecca of abandoned shopping malls. An area where I’m originally from, the closest mall to my hometown wasn’t featured (I have no idea if it’s dead or not), but there was one mall I was familiar with. The show was a heartstring-tugger, interviews with locals who spent time there when the malls were alive, contributing to the melancholy. I’m very drawn to abandoned places, and if you are too, this is the show for you.
🚤 Summer House mercifully had it’s finale. Kyle said they’ve come a long way since last year. Not really. The reunion might be interesting.
😐 Something to ponder…
Petulant is a great word, especially when said with a British accent.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
The Walking Dead
While watching for the Saviors, Morgan sees a vision of Gavin, who tells him that he knows what it is, and says Morgan was supposed to. Supposed to what, we don’t know, but Morgan says, no! and fights with nothing. He hears a car horn beep, and beeps back. Daryl blows an airhorn, and more cars honk theirs. Back at the ranch Hilltop, Jerry says, it’s on. Henry asks Ezekiel for a weapon, but Ezekiel tells him to stay and guard the place. Carol tells him he’ll die if he goes out during the attack. I see this ending badly.
Dr. Dana complains that Siddiq has no experience. He tells her he’s already performed three surgeries. She asks if he can shoot a gun while holding someone down. She tells him that someone who doesn’t know enough, is more dangerous than someone who doesn’t know sh*t. Siddiq tells her to stop asking what he’s done, and start telling him what to do. She says she likes him, and tells him to get ready.
Everyone waits. The Saviors arrive.
Simon has his men remove a roadblock. Maggie radios for Negan. Simon says he’s Negan, although his birth certificate says Simon. He offers condolences for what has happened, and what has about to. (Shades of Roscoe Lee Brown in The Cowboys.) He tells her that he personally received her care package. It was in the box he gave her in good faith; the trick was on him. Maggie says the bill is due, and they have to pay. They have thirty-eight of his people, alive and breathing. He’ll leave if he wants it to stay that way. If he doesn’t, she has thirty-eight bullets she’ll personally fire. Alden says it’s too nice a night to spend dying slow. Simon tells her that it’s highly regrettable, but they’re damaged goods. They got into their own pickle. The idea is to avoid capture, and now they’ll have to figure it out on their own. His own sh*t way of saying, screw them. Gregory tells Maggie that her cockamamie plan didn’t work, but she says it will.
Simon tells his men the plan has changed. They’re not aiming merely for infection, but conclusion. They’re doing away with all of them. Dwight says that’s not what Negan wanted, and he could still be out there. Is Simon sure he wants to face that with him? Simon tells Dwight it’s better to beg forgiveness than ask permission. Daryl rides past on his bike, shooting.
The gate opens, and Daryl drives in. The Saviors begin to follow, but the Hilltop bus suddenly blocks their path, and the first car rams into it. The Hilltoppers start to shoot. The Saviors shoot back, some using arrows. Alden asks Maggie to let him help defend the place. Maggie yells something I don’t hear. There’s lots of shooting. Carol runs to Tobin, who’s been hit. Siddiq comes by to relieve her, so she can go back to the fray. Simon and Dwight sneak around. Daryl sees them. Simon throws an ax, and hits someone. Michonne tells Daryl that they have to go. They shoot out the car headlights. It’s suddenly silent and dark.
Simon is such a jerk. He Captain Obviously says he can’t see sh*t. He sneaks around with a group of Saviors, and says he wants place surrounded. He tells them, slow and quiet. Dwight asks where the rest are, and Simon tells him that they’re making a house call. If Hilltop is at home, it’s time to do some proper slaughtering. He whistles, giving me a headache, and annoying the crap out of me. The Hilltoppers shoot at them, I’m so happy because it stops Simon’s whistling. The Saviors run. Some headlights come on, and here comes Rick, gun blazing.
Rick kicks ass, and almost whacks Siddiq. He tells Siddiq to stay low. Morgan’s Gavin vision tells that he knows what it is. Maggie and Rick shoot at the Saviors who are leaving. Maggie says she wanted them dead. All of them; Negan most of all. Rick says, him too. She asks if Rick saw him. Rick says he wasn’t there tonight, be he saw him out there. He tried to kill him, but didn’t. Maggie thanks him.
Tara thinks Dwight is on their side. She reminds Daryl that she was once with the Governor. Daryl’s brother was with them too. Daryl says if he’d stuck with his brother, they probably would have ended up with the Saviors. She says maybe Dwight figured out who they were. Daryl asks if that was before or after he killed Tara’s girlfriend, or are they square now? Tara says they are; he saved her life. She saw him try to help them. Daryl says he saw what he saw too.
Optimistic Rick takes the boards off of the windows in his house. Michonne saved him a turnip, but he says he’s good. He tells her that the generators were turned off to save gas, and the kids will need air. She asks to look at his cut, but he wants to finish first. She starts to help. He tells her that he saw the convoy, and he had to try.
Jerry digs graves. I mean literally, not that he thinks they’re cool. Maggie tells Alden he can bury his people, but he says they’re not his; he’s glad to see them that way. He tells Maggie that she’s a good leader. He knew it before, but last might she saved the community; she saved lives. Maggie says it’s because they sacrificed theirs, indicating the graves. She says it came at a cost, but her only regret is that Negan isn’t in the pile of bodies.
Carol nurses Tobin. He tells her if he knew getting stabbed got him this kind of attention, he’d have done it sooner. She tells him that she’s sorry for leaving, and for what she did. He says she doesn’t owe him anything. He asks if any of it was real, and she says she didn’t want it to be. She was pretending, trying to live a lie, because she couldn’t be around any more fighting and dying. At the time, maybe it felt like it wasn’t going to be pretending anymore. Tobin tells her that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to him. He asks if she’s leaving again, but she doesn’t know. She might accept that some are lucky to live, and some are lucky to fight. He asks what about after it ends, but she doesn’t think it does. He tells her the end is what they’re fighting for. Carol says it just means they get tomorrow. Maybe one more night; one more morning. After that, there’s no guarantees. As she’s talking, Alden buries the Saviors. Henry picks up a gun, and sneaks out. We see a clock ticking.
Rick loads his gun. Siddiq says he can treat Rick’s wound; he doesn’t want an infection. He tells Rick about a prayer for the dead he remembers from when he was little. Do not send us astray after them. He says, those who die, don’t. Rick gets up and leaves.
Holding a hurricane lamp, Maggie goes through the hallways crowded with people. She asks a man how he’s feeling. He says the doctor stitched him up. She says they’re lucky to have him, and the man says they’re lucky to have her. Gregory was all about himself and what he wanted; that’s not her.
In the infirmary, Tobin is startled awake at 2:13. Another guy wakes up, and asks what’s going on. One of the patients says he’s going to get the doctor, but just before he gets out the door, Tobin grabs him, and takes a bite. Oh well. I don’t know what this clock thing is about, but we keep seeing various timepieces.
Now it’s 4 a.m., and Dana walks in. She looks down, and realizes she’s standing in a pool of blood. Tobin takes a bite of her too. We hear zombie noises, along with the baby crying. The guy Maggie was talking to is now a zombie. He ambles, no, falls down the stairs. Hey, everybody, wake up!
Henry pokes at Gregory through the fence with his gun. Gregory asks Henry to let him out. Henry asks who killed his brother, but Gregory doesn’t know. He tells Henry that he isn’t one of them. He says Henry has a dangerous weapon, and he doesn’t want anyone to get hurt. He asks Henry to give it to him, and they’ll talk. He’s sorry about Henry’s brother, but killing them won’t bring him back. Henry says it will make him feel better. He did it once before; why not there? He asks if he has to start shooting until someone tells him who killed Ben. Alden says his brother died too. Killing his murderer sounds good in theory, but won’t make him feel better. Henry says it will for now. They hear screaming from inside.
Maggie sees chaos – running and biting, Daryl stabbing zombies in the head. I’d just leave. Michonne does a nice sword through the head move. Outside, Jared says it’s music to his ears. Henry asks if it was him, but Jared doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Henry lets himself into the Savior pen. He wants to know now. Alden says words are easier to live with than actions, but Henry says be a man and step forward, so he doesn’t have to kill their friends. He’s going to start counting to ten. When he gets to four, a zombie bites one of the Saviors, and there’s a free-for-all. Jared grabs the gun, and the Saviors run out, Gregory running along with them. Henry is left lying in the pen.
Morgan pikes zombies in the head. Daryl wonders if the zombies got in with the Saviors. Morgan says it’s their own people. Tobin is busy upstairs. Carol pulls him off someone, and stabs him in the head after only a momentary hesitation, and no doubt quick trip down Memory Lane. Daryl asks if she’s okay. She says he wasn’t bit, but he turned. Rick tells them about Negan’s bat being covered in zombie blood. They realize that anyone who was wounded is going to turn. A dude in one of the hospital beds says one of them will have to do it for him; he can’t. Everyone looks sad.
Rick tells the others that the house is clear. Tara asks how it happened. He tells her the Saviors did something to their weapons. Whoever was cut up or shot, got sick, and some turned. Daryl says Tara told him that she was done waiting. He could have killed Dwight, and should have. She says, no; he wanted to be there with them, but no matter how hard he tried, she wanted him dead. She couldn’t let it be anything else. Karma’s a bitch. Rick ponders that.
Outside, the struggle is real. Alden tells Maggie that some of them are trying to keep the gate closed. She sees some of the Saviors bracing the gate against the zombies. Siddiq tells her that he went to check on the prisoners, but the pen was empty. She asks Alden where they went, but he says they just ran. He tells her that he and the ones left had plenty of chances to run, but maybe it doesn’t matter to her.
Carol looks for Henry with Ezekiel. Enid tells them that he broke into the pen before the Saviors escaped. Carol says she told him this would happen, like that helps. Morgan thinks this over. Gavin appears, and keeps repeating, you know what it is, until he’s yelling. Morgan says, no.
Jerry and Jesus bury their people. Diane asks Maggie, what is it? and Maggie says, the cost. Rick nods sagely, and we end with a crane shot of all the graves.
I wonder why they kept focusing on Rick’s wound…
Next time, Rick goes hunting, Rosita wants the bullet maker, Jadis drags Negan out of the container she’d kept Rick in, Ezekiel wants to look for Henry and calls Carol a coward.
👹 Fear the Walking Dead returns on April 15th, and looks promising. The group takes over an amusement park, and raises sheep. Morgan also joins them, and Victor sports a new hairdo.
⚓ Talking Dead was bumped up an hour tonight to make room for a sneak preview of new series, The Terror. Set in 1847, and based on a true story about a ship that disappeared, the crew of a Royal Naval expedition searches for the Arctic’s treacherous Northwest Passage. Instead, they discover a monstrous predator. The two-hour premiere begins at 9 pm on Monday. The first hour was basically a set-up for the horror to come, but it looks good.
🍑 Kenya’s husband finally made an appearance on The Real Housewives of Atlanta, when she launched her PSA on domestic violence. The main takeaway point for me though, was what the hell was NeNe wearing?A muumuu? That outfit was worse than the one Sheree was wearing for the pictorial she sent to her incarcerated boyfriend. Next time, a Halloween costume party. I’m not sure what difference this will make from any other episode at this point.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
The Walking Dead
When last we left, teens and tweens everywhere were crying into their Skittles because Carl got bit. They’re thinking he might make a cute zombie though.
Rick prays that mercy prevails over his realm. I think this is a dream. There are kids running around, and Jerry is there. Everyone is all happy, and things look normal. In the here and now, Michonne and Rick dig what I assume is a grave. He tells her to go, and we flash back to Carl fighting off a zombie. This time we actually see him get bitten. It gets shot from behind, and Siddiq asks if he’s okay. He says he is. Siddiq and Carl drop down to the sewer tunnel.
Back home, Carl checks out his wound, and the bite holes in his shirt. He waits for Rick with a guard, who gives him a note from Michonne, saying she had to see for herself. Carl writes letters to everyone. He and Siddiq go back through the tunnel. Carl sets up a cot there. He rocks Judith on the porch, and they do some finger-painting. He takes a Polaroid selfie of the two of them. Carl and Siddiq share a candy bar. I guess this is his bucket list? Such as it is during the apocalypse.
Carl does some planting, and waves to Michonne as she drives by. He enjoys the sunshine.
Across from the Sanctuary, Morgan tries to get a bead on Negan. The Saviors shoot at the zombies outside, and Morgan tells someone on the radio, it’s not now. He says the Saviors are trying to make a path, using the zombie bodies as a block. Suddenly, the room Morgan is in, is being riddled with bullets. He stops, drops, and rolls out the door.
Morgan is outside, and sees the zombies wandering to the opera music. He bangs on the fence, distracting them. They come his way. Some Saviors pop out, but he’s able to slip away while they’re busy with the zombies. A Savior caravan goes by, and Morgan jets out of the forest as soon as they’re gone.
Elsewhere in the forest, Carol tells her Kingdom group about a place the Saviors don’t know about, and tells them to hide there until she comes back. Henry says he’s going too. They killed his brother, and he’s not going to let them kill her too. He wants a gun, but she says that’s not happening, and heads toward the Kingdom.
Carl shows Rick his wound and sweats bullets. Daryl holds Judith. Carl says, sorry, like he dented the car. He says if he doesn’t make it, he wanted to make sure he said goodbye, and gives Rick the letters. There’s shooting outside, and Rick says it’s them. Carl tells Rick about bringing Siddiq back, and that he’s the one from the gas station. It wasn’t the Saviors; it just happened. He got bit.
Gavin tells Ezekiel that Negan is going to kill him, and there’s nothing he can do to stop it. Ezekiel says he buried his people, and what happens to him matters not. Gavin says he liked him. He accepted things for how they were, and didn’t get any big ideas, but then Rick planted one, and here they are. Ezekiel says he made a choice he can live with; now it’s Gavin’s turn to do the same.
Morgan sneaks around the Kingdom. He runs into Carol, who’s also sneaking around. Morgan thinks they can take them one by one, but she thinks it’s better to avoid them until they can’t. He says they have Ezekiel, and she says they have to take them now.
Michonne tends to Carl. Siddiq has some OTC inflammatory that will help with the fever. It did for his mom and dad. Rick’s son should have them. Rick asks if he was a doctor, and Siddiq says he was a resident… before. Rick asks if he’s Siddiq. Carl says he wasn’t going to make it alone, and needed them. That’s why he brought him back. He starts coughing, and Rick gives him the medication.
Michonne tells Dwight to make it stop. He’s one of them. She begs him. Rosita says if Hilltop is safe, they should go there. Dwight says they’re looking right now. Their best chance is to stay until they’re gone. They’re almost done. It wasn’t about destroying the place; they don’t have the ammo for that. After they’re gone, that’s when they go. Rosita says they wait then. He asks if she thinks Hilltop the best plan, and she asks if he has another one. He says, all of them together, and Daryl finishes, it will be their worst nightmare.
Two Saviors are putting out fires (literally), while Morgan and Carol watch. He says they have to go through the courtyard, exposed; this is it. He taps one guy on the shoulder, and knocks him out with his staff. Carol knocks out the other. Carol thinks they should just do it. Two more Saviors run out, and they knock them out too. Morgan impales them with the pointy end. He and Carol go inside.
Gavin tells everyone to hustle. He asks Ezekiel if it’s going bad; if it’s going to turn into something else. Ezekiel says he’s the author of this nightmare. I’ll have to remember that one.
Michonne strokes Carl’s face. He says she’s supposed to be resting, but she tells him that she’s not tired. He says it’s going to stop; it’s not supposed to be like this. She’s having a hard time keeping it together.
Dwight thinks it sounds like it’s letting up. Rosita says it looks like he was right – about everything. Daryl decides to take a look, and hands Judith off to Rick.
Morgan and Carol sneak around some more. They start to go inside another building, but Morgan hears something. He looks around the corner of the porch, and sees some Saviors unloading a car. He silently goes down the steps, and kills all three of them, but another pops out of the building with a gun. Carol shoots him before he can shoot Morgan. Morgan takes one of their guns, and they go inside.
Ezekiel is packed into a pickup truck, and Gavin says it’s his last ride; try to make him comfortable. He tells Ezekiel that you try, and hope, and want things to finally settle, but no. it always comes down to this. It always has to get dark and ugly and inhuman. He doesn’t like it. Ezekiel says it’s not too late to walk back from something decided. Gavin says Ezekiel did, and look what it’s got him. Gavin gets on the radio, and calls Peter, but gets no response. He starts to get nervous, and calls Gomez, and also gets no response. Ezekiel tells him again that it’s not too late. They hear gunfire, and Gavin says to get Ezekiel inside now. Morgan and Carol creep around one of the trailers.
A tear rolls down Rick’s cheek. In his mind, he sees a cookout. Eugene jokes with Judith, who is around five. Rick and Michonne continue to dig.
The gunfire stops. Michonne says they can get to Hilltop. Rick says Carl won’t make it. He has to stay with him. She says they’ll both stay. He asks her to take Judith; she needs to be there. He starts to cry, and Daryl says he’ll take her and keep her safe. He’s got this. Rick wants to let her say goodbye, and brings her to Carl. Carl tells her that his hat was dad’s before it was his; now it’s hers. It always kept dad with him, and helped him. Maybe it will help her too. He tells her before mom died, she said he’d beat this horror, but he didn’t. She will though; he knows it. She starts howling, and Rick gives her to Daryl. Daryl says Carl saved them all. Everyone starts to leave.
Siddiq says Carl helped him, and he’s going to honor his memory. Carl brought him there and gave him a chance. Siddiq can never repay him, but can honor him by showing his people, friends, and family that what he did wasn’t for nothing. It mattered and meant something, and because it did, he’s going to honor Carl. Carl smiles, and shakes Siddiq’s hand. He tells Saddiq congratulations; he’s stuck with them. Siddiq leaves to join the others.
Commercial break. They need to stop trying to make Red Machete happen. It’s not going to happen.
Gavin tells everyone what to do. They’re ending this whatever the hell it is. He smacks Ezekiel, and says it is too late. He’s the author, and Ezekiel is the dead man. He lives, and Ezekiel dies; it’s the way it is. Ezekiel says the compromises he made were done to save lives. He realizes the compromises Gavin is making are to save only his, but no more. There’s an explosion, and everything is pretty dark. The Saviors start shooting. Gavin holds up his hand, signaling them to stop. He tells Morgan and Carol to give up, or Ezekiel is dead. Carol and Morgan come out, machine guns blazing. Gavin is so startled, he forgets all about Ezekiel, who dives for cover. Gavin gets hit in the leg, and drops his gun. Morgan has turned into a serious badass. We already knew Carol was. Ezekiel grabs Gavin’s gun, and now he’s a badass too. One of the Saviors gets Morgan down to the floor, and starts punching the crap out of him. With some bizarre burrowing skills, Morgan puts his hand into the guy’s wound, and practically disembowels – no, I spoke too soon – he disembowels him. Yep, he’s pulling the guy’s intestines out right out. Wow. I did not see that one coming.
Gavin gets up and tries to run (yeah, I’d be scared too), and Morgan shoots at him. He gets away, and Morgan picks up his staff/pokey stick. Ezekiel says they should leave, but Morgan tells him they don’t need to go, and heads after Gavin.
Violin music plays (I’m not kidding) as Rick and Michonne make Carl comfortable. He doesn’t want Michonne to be sad or angry. She’ll have to be strong for Rick and Judith, and for herself. She says she will, and he tells her not to carry this; not this one. He calls her his best friend. She says he’s hers too, and smiles through her tears. She kisses his hand. Rick says they need to get him out of there.
Gavin stumbles around like a blind bat out of hell, while Morgan walks steadily behind him like Michael Meyers in any one of the Halloween films.
The town is burning. Michonne and Rick walk out, with Carl between them. Rick says he can make it. They take Carl to the church, which is relatively unscathed by the fire.
Morgan drags his staff along the ground, like Freddy Krueger’s knife fingers, and Gavin shakes. He sees Morgan’s shadow. This is great. Morgan opens the door to Gavin’s hiding place, and he tumbles out.
Carl thanks Michonne and Rick for getting him there. He tells Rick about when they were back in the prison. When they got outside, there was a kid a little older than him with a gun. He was starting to put it down, and Carl shot him. He was giving up, and Carl just shot him. Carl thinks about him and what he did, and how easy it was to just kill him.
Morgan kicks Gavin. Gavin says Morgan is a sick man; he kept his word. Morgan’s not having it, and walks around him. Gavin says they can go back to Hilltop. Ezekiel and Carol arrive on the scene. Gavin says they think they can beat Negan. They can’t, but it can go back to how it was. Morgan says, no.
Rick tells Carl that what he lost, what happened, all those things he had to do; he was just a boy. Carl says Rick saw what he did, and how easy it got.
Gavin asks if Morgan killed all those men because of the kid. Morgan has his staff a few inches from Gavin’s nose. Gavin tells him killing him won’t make any of it go away. He’ll still wake up in the same sh*t tomorrow. Morgan drags him to his feet.
Carl says that’s why Rick changed. He brought them in, and they all lived together; frenemies. Rick put away his gun. He saw how Rick changed, so Carl could be who he is now. How he stopped fighting. It was right and still is. It can be like that again. He can still be like that again.
Ezekiel tells Morgan to cease this revenge. It’s the coward’s way. They don’t have to kill him. Let him see what he’s wrought, and let it be his to live with.
Carl says Rick can’t be who he was. He’s different now. He can’t kill all of them. There has to be something after. For Rick. For them.
Carol tells Morgan to stop. He doesn’t want to do this, and doesn’t have to. He’s the one who told her that they can be better than them. She can see he doesn’t want to do this. Morgan says he has to. Gavin looks petrified. Suddenly, there’s a hole in his neck, and blood starts pouring out. He drops to the ground, and Henry stands behind him with a pokey stick like Morgan has. Morgan looks slightly freaked.
Carl doesn’t know how it could be, but he’s seen it. We see it too, as he describes it. Rick has a beard, longer and greyer. Michonne is happy, and Judith is older, listening to songs he used to… before. Alexandria is bigger. There are new houses, crops, and people working. Everybody is living together, and everybody is helping everybody else. Rick can still be who he was. That’s how it could be. Rick says it was all for him from the start. Everything he did was for Carl and Judith; it still is. Nothing is going to change that. Carl says he wants this for Rick. Rick says he’ll make it real. He promises.
Ezekiel tells Henry that it’s all right. Henry says he had to. Carol scolds him, saying it’s not what he was supposed to do; it wasn’t for him. Ezekiel says all will be resolved, and hugs him.
Rick tells Carl that he’s sorry he couldn’t protect him. A father’s job is to protect his son. Carl says it’s just to love. Carl isn’t looking too good, and reaches for his gun. Michonne starts to say, it should be – and Carl says, he knows. It should be someone you love, but you should do it yourself if you still can. He has to do this. He tells her that he loves her, and she says she loves him too. He tells Rick that he loves him, and Rick says he loves Carl so much. Everyone is crying except me, since I stopped investing a long time ago. It’s a beautiful tableau though, with the light coming through the broken stained glass window, and the three of them in semi-darkness.
Rick and Michonne are outside, and we hear the gunshot.
Michonne and Rick dig. We see Carl’s idyllic world. Judith tells Negan good morning as he picks tomatoes.
Rick sits under a tree. Panes of stained glass hang from its branches.
Next time, Simon thinks they should cut their losses, Negan says to do the job, and Simon approaches the Heapsters.
🎶 Side knowledge: During the opening scenes, the song At the Bottom of Things by Bright Eyes was playing. Loved. It.
🍑 I’m half paying attention to The Real Housewives of Atlanta, where they’re infecting Barcelona with American reality TV. The amusing highlight of the evening – besides my husband asking if everyone was Nene, since that’s the only name he knows – was when the women were leaving their hotel. Apparently, it wasn’t up to the standard these peaches are used to, and a few of them were saying, “Goodbye, mildew,” on their way out the door. For a moment, I thought mildew was someone’s name.
👹 Ash Vs the Evil Dead had its season premiere tonight. Ash opened a hardware store/sex emporium in his home town, but his retirement from chasing deadites was not to be. The book was back, via an idiot on an Antiques Roadshow type program reading out loud from it. Why does everybody always read out loud from age-old spells? It’s really a bad idea. Ash had a wife and a daughter he knew nothing about (nor did we), but the wife didn’t matter, since she got her head sliced off with a cymbal in the high school band room. It looks like Ash’s daughter, Brandy, will be coming along for the ride this season, as well as Kelly’s boyfriendsidekick whatever-he-is, Dalton, who is also the descendant of an ancient order of knights who fight evil.
🔫 AMC has a new show coming up on Monday called McMafia. I’m wondering if it’s about an Irish mafia guy, or if the mafia is a franchise now.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
At the cemetery, Lulu says she’s sorry abut Maxie’s loss. Maxie says she should be; she killed him. Lulu asks how she can say that. Maxie says Lulu wanted to be the next big thing; journalism’s next superstar. She asks if Lulu got her story, and what the going rate is for her husband’s life.
At The Floating Rib, Anna asks if Felicia and Mac need anything. Felicia tells her, a time machine. Yeah, we could all use one of those.
Kim goes to Charlie’s to get take-out. Julian tells her they have couple’s dinners available for Valentine’s Day, and gives her the menu to check out. She says it’s a little over the top for her son.
Finn and Alexis are leaving an AA meeting at the hospital. Finn asks Alexis if he agrees to buy coffee, will she get off his back about sharing? She says she will, if he’ll add telling her one significant detail.
Sam asks Drew why the staring contest with Franco. He wonders why he’s making Franco nervous. Franco suggests to Elizabeth that they leave, but she wants to wait for Maxie to get there. Mac wonders where Maxie is.
Lulu tells Maxie that she didn’t fire the gun. Maxie says she didn’t shoot Nathan, but she put him in a position to be shot. And for what? A stupid article? A pat on the back from her boss? Lulu says she understands Maxie’s heart is breaking and needs to lash out, but Maxie says, no; she needs her husband. She tells Lulu don’t dare cry, and Lulu says she loved Nathan too. Maxie says she used him to advance her career. She actually believed she’d become a prize-winning journalist after two weeks. Her ego knows no bounds. She exploited Nathan. She knew he wanted to get Faison away from his family, and Nathan agreed because she put the idea in his head, making him think it was the only way when it was just her way. Peter listens from behind some bushes, looking pained. Maxie says Lulu did it to get an interview, and she knows it’s true. Dante says they’re not doing this, and Maxie tells him she knows he told Lulu to leave it to the police. Lulu says Nathan was the police, but Maxie says, no. He was a husband and father-to-be who would do anything to protect his family, and she took advantage of that. Why not? She had nothing to lose. She risked nothing, and in turn took everything from Maxie.
Oscar and Josslyn enter Oscar’s apartment. He tells Josslyn she has to be fast; his mom will be home soon. She asks what if she hurts him, but he tells her to hurry.
Finn wants to go to Charlie’s, but Alexis says Julian is Charlie. Finn wonders when that happened, and says he has to get online more. He asks if she wants to go somewhere else, but she says, let’s just do it.
Franco ponders the rabbit’s foot. Drew asks how it’s going. Franco says it’s a funeral, and leaves the table.
Spinelli tells Anna that his deepest regret is not finding Faison sooner, and Anna agrees it would have played out differently. He asks if she’s still looking for Henrik, and she says, absolutely. He could be planning on picking up where his father left off. Spinelli says Henrik’s trail is as cold as Faison himself. Anna tells him that no one can stay lost forever.
Dante wants Lulu to leave, but she says she needs to make Maxie understand. Maxie says, of course that’s her response. No I’m sorry; noI was wrong, and made the biggest mistake of my life. It’s Maxie’s problem, and Lulu has to make her see she’s right and Maxie is wrong because Lulu is always right. The one thing that could bring her closure is Lulu admitting her part, but she’ll never get it. It’s not Lulu’s style or in the Spencer DNA. Lulu says she admits it when she’s wrong, and Maxie asks when was the last time she did that. Lulu asks if she wants an example, and Maxie says she does, but she doubts Lulu will be able to find one. When Maxie screwed up, she felt terrible and apologized over and over until Lulu forgave her, but she’ll never get that from Lulu. Her ability to feel regret or remorse doesn’t exist. She’s incapable of it, and also a murderer, but a morally superior one, so there’s that.
Lulu says she can’t mean it. She asks Maxie to talk, but Maxie says it’s not her job to make it better for Lulu. Nina tells Lulu to stop; she’s done enough. She tells Lulu to please go, and leads Maxie away. Dante takes Lulu in the opposite direction. Nina asks if Maxie is okay, and suggests they go to the reception. Maxie doesn’t want to leave him; she doesn’t know how to do this. She asks Nina to please tell her how. Nina doesn’t know, but they’ll figure it out together. They hug, and Valentin takes Nina’s hand.
Drew tells Franco that he thought the condolences went well. Franco says the whole thing is sad and awful. Drew asks if Franco is avoiding him.
Julian tells Kim that she’s not walking home alone. She says a free drink, take out, and delivery, and Julian says he aims to please. She says, or make someone jealous. She sees him staring at Alexis, and he says he’s just making sure the customers have what need. Kim hands him the bags to carry. At first, he acts like the bags heavy, giving me hope that one of the actors gets it, but then, not so much. (sigh) Finn asks Alexis about getting something to eat, but she says she’s not hungry.
Peter stands by Nathan’s grave with tears in his eyes. He says it’s strange to say goodbye when they weren’t formally introduced; not as brothers at least. He wishes he’d known Nathan. He seemed like a good man; loving, kind, heroic – all the things their father wasn’t. He says it’s so clear how much Maxie loves him. He’s tempted to say he was a lucky man. He’s truly sorry that his luck ran out.
At The Floating Rib, Anna tells Maxie it was an honorable send off for an honorable man. Maxie looks at the pictures, and says she knows how much Nathan loved her. Sam tells her that she was great today. Nathan would be proud. Maxie excuses herself, and tells Nina that she can’t be there. Everyone is so sad and sorry. Nina tells her to take care of herself. Felicia wants to take her home, but she wants to be alone. After she leaves, Spinelli tells them that what Maxie says she wants and what she needs are often different things. Mac tells him to take care of their girl, and he follows Maxie.
Franco thought Drew would prefer he keep his distance, and Drew says he does. He asks how long Franco has known Jim. Franco says as long as Drew has, since they were little kids. Drew asks if Franco recognized him, but Franco says it was the other way around. Jim showed up at his studio. Drew wonders why he wouldn’t have said something about meeting someone from their past. Franco says there is no “our past,” just the past. The were toddlers, and don’t remember. Drew asks to see the rabbit’s foot.
Valentin sees Anna in the hallway. She asks how Nina is doing, and he says as would be expected. He wants to help, but can’t. Anna says he’s helping more than he knows. She tells him that she’s still processing their conversation. He wonders if there’s anything he can do or any questions he can answer. She asks why keep quiet? He hated her for so long, and all this time, had ammunition at his disposal. If anyone found out she had Faison’s child, it would kill her career and damage her personal life. He had the means to take her down, and didn’t. What stopped him? He says there’s a thin line between love and hate. He loved her, hated her, and everything in between, but could never bring himself to destroy her.
Josslyn is in front of Oscar, who’s sitting on a stool. She’s doing something, but we don’t see what. Kim comes into the apartment with Julian, and Oscar and Josslyn scramble around; Oscar running into the kitchen. Josslyn asks why Julian is there, and he says, love you too. Oscar messes around in the kitchen, and Kim asks what he’s doing. He says grabbing some food, and she tells him to say hello to their guest. He walks over, and we see he has a black eye. I laugh because I thought Josslyn was waxing his eyebrows or something.
Alexis says there seems to have been an uptake in Finn’s attendance at AA meetings, and asks if it’s because of Anna. Finn says he has a tendency not to know what has until it’s gone. Dante and Lulu come in. Lulu tells Dante it won’t shut off. It’s not just the words, but the way Maxie said them. Maxie hates her. So do I. Her point?
Maxie hesitates before going into the apartment. She finally does, and sits on the couch without taking off her coat. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Spinelli, and she asks what he’s doing there. He says her mother was right; she shouldn’t be alone. She says, but she is.
Elizabeth asks Franco if everything is okay, and he tells her Drew was just asking to see the rabbit’s foot. Elizabeth asks why, and Drew thinks he recognizes it. Franco hands it to him. Sam says, anything? Drew says, no, but he appreciates it.
Anna thanks Valentin. Felicia sees them in the hall, but goes back inside. Anna is grateful he kept quiet. She asks if he knows where her daughter is, and if he kept track of her, but he says he only knew what the midwife told him. It was a private adoption; no birth certificate, and no records exist. She went to a good family, and has a good life where Faison doesn’t exist. If Anna found her, she would have to tell her the truth. She says, Robin too; it would turn her life upside down for a multitude of reasons. Valentin says she knows what she has to do.
Oscar tells Kim that he got in a fight. Kim says, that’s clear, but with who? He asks if she remembers the friend he told her about that identifies as a girl, and says he stood up for her. She says next time, tell a teacher, and don’t provoke the bully. He says there wasn’t any time. Josslyn says if he hadn’t stepped in, their friend would have been seriously hurt. Kim says she cares about her son, not their friend.
Finn tells Alexis that he keeps making the same mistake over and over. She asks who left who, and he says this time, it was all Anna. It’s like she opens a door with one hand, and slams it shut with the other.
Dante tells Lulu that he was with Nathan every day. Nathan wanted Faison caught. Lulu admits she pushed him about the interview until he gave in. She should have stayed out of it. Dante takes her hand.
Spinelli gives Maxie some tea. She asks if he thinks it’s strange that she didn’t want Georgie at the funeral. He says on the contrary. She was looking out for their daughter, who is too little to understand what transpired. She also would have missed her school outing. Maxie brightens a little, and says, her first field trip. Spinelli tells her that Georgie went to the Portland zoo, but she doesn’t have to only imagine it. She asks if he has a video, but he was referring to her coming home with him. Their guest room goes unused, and Georgie would be ecstatic to spend more time with her. She tells him that going to Portland won’t make her forget that her husband is dead.
Peter looks for Maxie, and Sam tells him it was too much for her. He says it’s understandable. Drew and Sam hope he’s had a chance to regroup, and rethink leaving. They’re not shutting any doors.
Valentin tells Anna that she made a bold choice. Does she continue going forward with the consequences, or pass it on to her children? He gives her some advice that he ultimately borrowed from her. Let the past be the past. They’ve all made mistakes. The difference between him and her is that she wants to be better; so be better. She wonders if it will be enough, and he says it will have to be. He leaves to be with Nina.
As the kids are leaving, Julian tosses Oscar the bag of frozen peas. Josslyn says she’ll tell her stepdad that he said hello. Kim asks if Sonny is a friend of his, and he says, not exactly.
Finn asks Alexis, where is he supposed to go with this?
Maxie tells Spinelli she can’t jet off to Portland and forget Nathan. She forgot before, when she could have been at home instead of wasting precious time. She’s not wasting more by running away. Not feeling the loss, doesn’t mean it’s not there. Spinelli says he wasn’t suggesting that. She knows he was just trying to help, but don’t. She tells him don’t show up either. He doesn’t understand what happens when she hears a knock or footsteps or the elevator door. Every moment of every day is a reminder that Nathan is gone. All the brief, blissful moments of hope are the hardest to get over. She needs to be there until she does. She doesn’t need reminders. It’s horrifyingly real, and he can’t help her with that. She tells him to leave. He kisses her forehead and goes.
Peter tells Nina how sorry he is. She introduces him to Valentin. Valentin says it’s kind of him to come, and he says they’re all family at Aurora. Nina leaves them to help Felicia. Valentin says he hopes Peter has reconsidered leaving town. Some people might get suspicious. Peter thinks Valentin is overestimating his importance, but Valentin says Drew is going to follow every lead. Peter says there were complications, and Valentin says it was a shame about Nathan being collateral damage. He tells Peter to trust him, since he’s always looked out for him in the past.
Lulu tells Dante she has to quit her job. He says she loves it, but she says she loves Maxie more, and needs to make this right.
Alexis tells Finn she’s a master of mixed signals, both giving and getting them. She says that people can hold mixed truths in their hearts. If Anna is finding it that hard to keep away, she’s not ready.
Kim tells Julian that Oscar is her everything. He’s all she has. Julian says that’s not entirely true. She says she has her work, and it’s meaningful, but he says she also has friends.
Elizabeth asks where the rabbit’s foot came from, and Franco tells her it was in a box with his stuff from New York. It’s been with him ever since. She says it’s done it’s job. They’re happy, in love, and about to get married. Who’s luckier than them?
Sam tells Drew to remember the last time he got that familiar feeling. It was about Kim, and she ended up being a big part of his life. The rabbit’s foot could be a missing piece of the puzzle.
Felicia says she saw Anna talking to Valentin, and asks if she should be worried. Anna says it’s taken decades, and they have no more wars to fight.
Nina places a ticket stub from the Natural History Museum on Nathan’s grave. She talks to Valentin about taking Nathan there, and thanks him for bringing her. She needed one more chance to say goodbye. He tells her that he’s been in a lot of dangerous situations, but he never met someone as brave as she’s been today. She says she doesn’t feel brave. He tells her that she doesn’t have to, and holds her.
Maxie put on Nathan’s jacket and smells it. She talks to the baby, saying she’s so sorry. Sorry the baby won’t get to meet the dad who would have loved them; he already did. She’s sorry she lost it earlier, and hopes she didn’t scare the baby by freaking out about the future. She swears its mom isn’t psycho, just sad and angry. She’ll pull it together. It’s what the baby’s dad would have wanted. He’d want her to sing songs and make the baby laugh, like he was looking forward to doing. She’ll do it for both of them. It’s not the same, and they’ll always miss him, but she thinks if they’re brave and lean on each other, they’ll get through it and be okay.
Tomorrow, Robin thanks Jason for killing Faison, Michael says he’s selling the building, and Sonny tells Mike he’s not going anywhere.
Vanderpump Rules
Stassi and Katie go shopping at Dapper Cadaver. Stassi is having a death/murder-themed birthday party, and I guess this is the place to go. She’s celebrating the death of her 20s. When she dies, she wants to be taxidermized with a glass of wine in her hand and let people take photos with her. I actually think this is a cool idea. She has a list of the various items she wants to get, and goes over the guest list with Katie. In her interview, she tells us that Patrick blocked her when he went to Amsterdam. She tried sexting him, he turned her down, and she got angry, telling him she was going to find someone else. He’s finally unblocked her, so she’s hoping he comes to the party. She thinks she and Ariana having the same birthday is like Bride Wars.
Billie, Scheana, Lala, and Ariana go outfit shopping. Ariana is having a kings and queens party, because she’s a queen. I could make a lot of jokes here, but I’ll leave it. The girls look through the fabulous dresses, lingerie, and accessories. Billie tells Ariana that her 30s is her prime, but Ariana says she’s not having sex. In her interview, she says she’s not a fan of her nether regions. Really. She said that.
Tom and Schwartz go to the restaurant site. Today is the day to find out if the permits are approved. Without them, they can’t start the construction. Tom says they’ve been through a lot of ups and downs, and we flash back to those. Lisa and Ken arrive. Lisa says Tom smells like alcohol. He tells her the triplets are on their way home, but last night they went to a strip club and made it rain. Lisa wonders if Schwartz’s wife knows he went to a strip club. She tells them the permits have been approved, and they start Monday. Tom counts it among one of the best days of his life. He writes a check, but tells Lisa not to cash it until the end of the month. Schwartz is having PTSD from writing the check for the wedding. That’s why they catch you at the end for that. You’re a little drunk, so it doesn’t hurt as much. He didn’t say that last part. It’s my personal observation.
Ariana visits therapist Julia. She says it’s long overdue. She wants to do more to help herself and get her head right. She tells Julia about her self-criticism, and how it’s amplified over the years. Her ex-boyfriend added to the problem. She says in the beginning, she thought it was a fling, but he wanted her to stay, and after she moved in, held it over her head because she had no money. Julia asks about her support system, and she says Tom is a true partner. Julia wonders about marriage and family, and Ariana says she never wants to give birth. Her goal is to just be able to function without so much anxiety. In her interview, she wants to communicate her feelings to Tom, but doesn’t want him to think it’s him. She tells Julia she’s frozen. Well, let it go then. BA-DUM-CHH!
James, Lala, Brittany, and Schwartz go to Villa Rosa to discuss World Dog Day. Lisa wanted a festival that was diametrically opposed to the Yulan dog meat festival. In his interview, James says it’s not the most extravagant or exciting gig he’s had, but on the road to success, you have to pay your dues. Lisa suggests Schwartz make out with the guests for a fifty-cent donation. Brittany asks if Lisa is coming to either of the parties, but she doesn’t have the time. Giggy! Schwartz tells her that she wouldn’t have to dress up for Ariana’s party, since she’s already a queen. Once again, I have to squelch my jokes.
Lisa asks Brittany to stay behind. She wants to talk about Jax. Lisa says it’s been challenging to say the least, and she doesn’t want him there tomorrow. She tells Brittany that she doesn’t want him anywhere near her.
Tom makes breakfast and serves it to Ariana. He asks how therapy was. She says she’s a work in progress, but she’s glad he stuck around. He says he doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with her, but when they first started dating, they had sex all the time. In his interview, he says he understands the excitement dies down, but thinks she’s afraid to tell him. He tells her that he knows the newness wears off, but she says the only thing that wears off is confidence; there’s no pretending. He thinks she felt it more back then, but she begs to differ, telling him she was just saying it to impress him. In her interview, she says she knows it must be confusing for him. Ariana isn’t thrilled that they haven’t been spending much time together. Tom says he got a high off of helping Tom’s brothers and we see clips. He gets that some things turn her off, but she says there’s no closeness if they don’t do things together. In her interview, she says when he does other things, it makes her think he doesn’t want her. He tells her that he can’t read her mind.
Katie does Stassi’s makeup. She says she wants to be a hot dead girl, and is going for shot-in-the-head chic. Kristen says they’re like sluts in a morgue. Katie tells them about Kevin Lee bringing her flowers, and we see a clip. He tells her that he’s sorry, and she tells him that he should never make comments about weight to anybody. Ever. She tells the girls it was awkward. His apology doesn’t affect her, but she feels badly for him.
Tom loves dressing up and going over the top. Jax stops by while Tom is trying on costumes. He tells Tom that he and Brittany decided on prom king and queen. He’s wearing a prom style tux, and stopping by Burger King for a crown on the way there. Tom puts in creepy white contacts. Brittany calls, and lets Jax know about Lisa not wanting him at World Dog Day. He doesn’t know why Lisa is holding a grudge when others have done worse. I hate that. I hate when people won’t take responsibility, and try to deflect by pointing at someone else. He tells her just go without him. She says he’ll miss the beauty pageant, and Tom adds there are a lot of hot bitches there.
It’s party time! We visit Ariana’s party first. Tom, wearing a Maleficent costume, introduces Queen Ariana, who is dressed in gold with a huge spiky crown. James says everyone is killing it with the costume game tonight. I would agree, but Scheana and Lala are basically dressed in lingerie and wearing crowns. I’m not sure if that qualifies as a costume. Lala says she’s never missing one of Ariana’s birthdays again. Billie tells Tom that she’s heard amazing things about his drag, and we flash back to that.
Schwartz says Stassi put her name on the party – it’s macabre. He thinks the scariest thing is the ranch dressing fountain, and has no doubt people will put their fingers in it by the end of the night. Peter brings a bottle of Dom Perignon from Lisa and Ken. Stassi is thrilled, since a year or so ago, she would have gotten a bag of Giggy’s flaming dog poopy. Patrick comes in wearing a man bun, which is scarier than everything else combined. Stassi’s mother asks how the trip was, and Patrick says he had a great time. Stassi feels like she’s walking on eggshells, trying to make things work. Her best solution is to drink. She orders Jager bombs all around. Bleh. I think that’s even worse than the fountain. It tastes like cough medicine.
Jax tells Billie that he’s not going to Stassi’s party. He doesn’t want to be around the anxiety; he’s trying to surround himself with better people. Ariana tells Tom that experiencing things together is a huge thing for her, and he apologizes. He says he needs her; she’s his foundation. Well, that beats saying she completes him. It kills him that she’s doubting herself and being self-conscious. He tells her that she’s his number one, and she says ditto. She says if she doesn’t feel the closeness, it’s hard to get busy. They kiss. She says he’s not perfect, and she’s a work in progress (all right already), and she wants to be close to him. He suggests they make magic happen, and she asks if she can keep her crown on.
Katie tells Patrick that he and Stassi need to stop breaking up and making up. He says he doesn’t care if she has sex with other people, but he doesn’t want her to have emotional commitment with anyone else. Kristen says Stassi has always been the conductor in relationships, but with Patrick, she’s second fiddle.
Ariana’s brother, Jeremy, is wearing a little crown that reminds me of Blaine and Antoine (Men on Film) on In Living Color. He takes the mic, and wishes Ariana a happy birthday. The cake comes out, and Ariana tells everyone how glad she is they came. She breaks up a plastic crown, and tosses the pieces out like in Mean Girls. She says she’s not a queen amongst peasants; they’re all royalty.
Katie has brought in Arielle the stripper from her party in in Las Vegas, and wants Stassi to take a shot off of her body. Stassi says she wanted her as a guest, not a serving tray, and declines. She’s nervous about Patrick being there, because they’ve been fighting, and she’s effed-up on Adderall and tequila. She walks outside. Kristen and Katie follow. She tells them she hasn’t been able to talk to Patrick the entire night, and she’s annoyed by how everything turned out. They try to talk her into coming back in, but she tells them to go eff themselves; she’s leaving. Kristen says back in the day, she would have gone after Stassi, but she’s an adult. Get a grip and grow up.
It’s World Dog Day. This year, they’ve taken over the street where the rescue center is. Cute dogs everywhere! Brittany’s Monroe wins the beauty pageant, and title of VP Posh Pup. Brittany hopes it doesn’t go to Monroe’s head, since she can’t deal with two big-headed divas at home, the other one being Jax. Scheana asks Peter about Stassi freaking out at her party. He tells Ariana that Stassi was ticked off about the body shot. Ariana says this is why they’re not friends.
Brittany tells Lisa that Jax will have to do a lot of work before she ever makes him another sandwich. Brittany asks if Jax has texted, but Lisa says no. She tells Brittany his apology doesn’t cut it now. He was in enough trouble at the Beverly Hills Life party, but by not reaching out, he’s dug a deeper hole. Lisa says she supports them, and expects the same in return. Stassi texts an apology to Katie. Katie says the meltdown was Stassi circa 2012, and immature bullsh*t. They also had to pick up a $1400 tab. Schwartz is surprised, thinking it had just been a mini meltdown.
This season, horses, dancing, the Toms are late for a meeting, Stassi thought it would be different with Patrick this time, drinking, more drinking, Tom doesn’t want to be around Katie, Brittany kicks Jax out, and Jax gets fired… maybe.
🍑 On The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Porsha had a vegan dinner for the ladies, and Cynthia invited them all on a trip to Barcelona. Kenya seems somewhat separated from the pack this time around, probably due to being a newlywed and having an ongoing feud with Kim. I’m lukewarm about this season, but this episode did give me what could possibly be the best quote of the millennium:
💥 What kind of fraggle knackle bullcrap is this? – Sheree Whitfield
🔪 I’m already loving Channel Zero: Butcher’s Block. In this latest effort, the plot revolves around an odd town with a strange history, where people keep disappearing. Sisters Zoe (Holland Rogan) and Alice (Olivia Riccardi) are making a fresh start there. Alice is a budding social worker, and Zoe is being treated for the “insidious onset” of schizophrenia, as well as battling a drug addiction. Landlady Louise (Krisha Fairchild) made it clear from the start that she wasn’t their mom, not even their cool aunt, but their landlady, yet she shared a joint and a story with Zoe not long after the girls arrived. Louise was also a reporter back in the day, and is working on a book about the town and the disappearances, her brother having been one of them. I adore her already, and hope she doesn’t meet an untimely end.
During Alice’s first day on the job, a child disappears while waiting to be picked up by CPS, vanishing inside her own home. Alice’s supervisor chalked it up to the mother running with the child, but Alice wasn’t so sure. That night, she followed a small, shadowy figure to an old park, thinking it was the little girl. At the entrance, she found Rutger Hauer instead, who was creepy, yet somehow grandfatherly. Out for his nightly walk, he told her his family once owned the park and he lives close by. Further into the woods, Alice discovered the figure, sitting at the bottom of a staircase that went nowhere, and what she had thought to be a little girl, was a little person, with a weird, unnerving baby’s face. It went after her with a mallet, but she was saved by a tall creature – what it would look like if Groot and the Visible Man had a baby – who took the whatever-it-was up the stairs. Later, Alice saw Louise’s research board for her book, which included a photo of the Peach family, who owned a lot of the town way back when. The focal point of the town is a huge brick building labeled Peach’s Meats with a logo of Joseph Peach’s face. He’s the family patriarch, and oddly enough, looks just like Rutger Hauer.
Zoe realized that Alice had concerns about following in her mental footsteps. Feeling smothered and weirded out – there’s also a nutcake lady running around town looking for scissors, which Louise has informed them not to give her – Zoe decides to book. While at the bus stop, she meets Joseph. Being musically inclined, I’m super aware of soundtracks (Vanderpump Rules always has a great one), and I almost fell off the couch when I heard Timothy by The Buoys in the background while Louise was working. For you youngsters, it was a hit in the 70s, written by Rupert Holmes, and is about some miners who eat one of their own when they become trapped. How this became a hit, who knows? but I do have it on a 45 somewhere. This clinched the deal for me with Louise. She also gave me the second-best quote:
🌏 When you set out to change the world, the world changes you.
Creepy babies, creepy Groots, staircases to nowhere, a strange landlady (her hobby is taxidermy) who smokes weed, a mysterious town, and Rutger Hauer. Seriously, what more could you want?
💀 The Visible Man
My sister had one of these when I was a kid, and I was fascinated with it.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
The beginning was interrupted for a weather report. News flash – it’s still raining.
Jason tells Sam the money never mattered; he just wants her to be okay. She says she knows. She starts to sign the papers, but Alexis advises her not to sign just yet. She’d be remiss not discussing the issue of Danny’s custody. Diane says there is no issue. Jason is the father biologically and legally. Alexis says he isn’t the father Danny knows; Drew is.
Oscar meets Drew at the gym. He suddenly forgot he needs to study, and says see you later. Drew asks why he wanted to meet. Oscar says it’s stupid, but he wanted Drew to teach him to fight. I wonder if Oscar irritates himself sometimes.
Josslyn says the dress she’s wearing is hideous, and she looks like a sister wife. Carly disagrees. Sonny says she looks beautiful, and asks if Carly doesn’t have the same dress. Josslyn says, says kill me now.
Nina isn’t too enthusiastic about working. She didn’t want to leave her family, and says Maxie is lucky; she can bring her family with her. Maxie says unfortunately, what she feels, the baby feels, and she doesn’t want the baby stressed. Nina says she can go home, but Maxie says it doesn’t help to protect her family. Nina asks, from what?
Lulu and Nathan meet at Charlie’s. She tells him spreading truth is the best way to flush Faison out of hiding. She asks Nathan how he felt, finding out one of the most wanted criminals in the world is his father?
Nina asks Maxie what’s going on? Maxie says PBAs, GMOs; there are so many poisons out there that can harm her baby. Nina suggests reading labels and not using old hairspray. She understands wanting to protect your family, and Maxie asks how far she’d go to protect hers. Nina would go all the way, and knows Maxie would too. She asks what’s wrong. Maxie says it’s Nathan’s father. His father isn’t Victor. It’s someone much worse, who’s alive and kicking.
Fastest. Interview. Ever. Lulu thinks Nathan calling Faison a nicotine stained relic, not fit for a family about sums it up. She says it’s better to add insult to injury, and tells him to look for it tomorrow morning. He begs her to keep Maxie’s name out of it. She says everyone knows they’re married after the Ask Man Landers article, but he says just don’t make it a focus. She says if they played this correctly, when Faison shows his face, it will be to Nathan.
Kim asks Julian for some coffee. She notices one of Sonny’s cardboard counter ads, and says she sees he’s the proud purveyor of Corinthos coffee.
Josslyn says Oscar will be embarrassed to be seen with her, but Carly says he’d love her in a sack. Josslyn asks Sonny if he has any extra coffee bags. Sonny asks if she has something else in mind, and Josslyn says she’ll put it on right now. Sonny asks Carly what’s going on? She tells him, teenage drama. He says that’s the way it starts, but then it always turns into something else.
Oscar says he figured it’s something every guy should know, and he can’t exactly ask his mom. Drew tells him to never discount women. Oscar says sorry to bother him, but Drew calls him back. He says he’s not prying, but if Oscar really wants to learn, he’ll teach him. Lesson number one: he needs workout clothes.
Alexis says it’s her obligation to bring up the custody issue. Diane says if that’s the case, everything else is off the table, and they’ll see each other in court. Alexis tells her that Danny knows no father but Drew, and Diane says it’s through no fault of Jason’s. Alexis says out of fear for Jake’s safety, Jason let Lucky claim him as his own. Diane can’t wait to get it before a judge, so Alexis can give her insight into Jason’s thoughts. Alexis says it makes sense that he’d use the same consideration for Danny, and take himself out of his son’s life.
Nina asks Maxie, why take Obrecht’s word? Peter interrupts, telling Nina that her budget is out of control. He hands her one that works. She asks if he doesn’t have subordinates to do that, and he tells her that he takes an active role, so the team feels they can come to him directly. A successful company isn’t just a business; it’s a family. Maxie looks at him weird, probably thinking what a lot of us are – Peter is the traitor.
Drew begins to instruct Oscar, telling him power comes from his core. Oscar makes the same mistake I always do when kickboxing, and drops his hands. Drew tells him to protect himself at all times, and shows him how to do jabs. He says Oscar is doing good, and Oscar asks what if the guy is bigger? Drew tells him it’s not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog. There are ways to fight a bigger guy using leverage. It’s more involved, but he can teach him. It would help though, if Oscar let him know what he’s facing.
Sonny tells Carly it’s a dress, not a crisis; just let her wear it. They’ve got to give them some freedom. Carly says she’ll remind him about this when Avery is a teenager. Dress provocatively, and a reputation will follow. He says if he’d figured out a way to talk to Kristina, she might not have made the mistakes she did. He suggests not being so controlling, and letting them figure it out.
Alexis says it would be in Danny’s best interest to allow Drew to be his father, unless Jason renounces organized crime. Sam says they’ve already talked about this, and she won’t sign anything limiting Jason from Danny’s life. Diane says she’s being sensible, and Sam asks for the pen.
Carly asks Sonny thinks she’s controlling, but he says ask Josslyn. His phone rings, and he tells her that he needs to meet up with Jason. Maybe they can work out a compromise. Carly says he hates compromise, but he says he does it for the people he loves.
Oscar tells Drew that there’s a guy who doesn’t like the way other people act. He’s not getting in their faces, but he’s had enough. Drew asks if he’s talking about himself?
Kim messes with Julian’s coffee machine, and tells him about transferring to GH from Mercy. He says at least she has training and experience in service. The industry is new to him. She asks why get into it, and he tells her that he was lonely.
Sam signs the papers. Alexis says they need to be filed, but for all intents and purposes, the marriage is dissolved, and they’re free to move on. Diane says, good luck with that, and leaves. Jason says, about Danny… and Sam says they don’t have to talk about it. She would never do anything to keep him away. Jason gets a call, and has to go. Alexis tells Sam it wasn’t easy, and Sam says she made it worse. Alexis says as Sam’s attorney, she was only doing her job. Sam says, not anymore. She’s fired.
Nathan goes to the Crimson office, and asks if Maxie can spare a minute. Nina asks Peter if they’re done, and he leaves. Nathan thinks they should tell Nina what they found out, but Nina says she knows that Faison is Nathan’s father. Maxie says she couldn’t keep it in, but outside of a handful of people, no one needs to know. Nina says no one ever will. Nathan adds, until the paper comes out tomorrow.
Jason goes back to Sonny’s office, and says it’s over. Spinelli says they need a better grasp of Faison’s antagonist, and perhaps a means of apprehending him.
Lulu asks what Peter thinks. He says it’s gold.
Maxie asks what Nathan was thinking. He says they can catch him and put him away. She can’t believe Lulu would do this. Nathan says don’t blame Lulu, but Nina blames her – and him for talking to the press. Maxie says Faison is going to come looking for him, but Nathan says they can’t live their lives waiting. Nina says what if Faison thinks the easiest way to get to him is through his wife?
Sam tells Alexis that Jason already gave up everything. Is he supposed to give up his son too? He deserves the opportunity to be a father. Danny already likes him, and no one is taking him away – ever. Alexis asks what if something happens to her? Will she be okay if a mob enforcer has custody, and not Drew? Sam says she trusts Jason to make the right decision. Alexis isn’t sure about Jason’s definition of safe and secure, but Sam says he’s generous and brave, and he loves without holding back. She wants him to teach their son all those things. It’s her life, her son, her divorce, and she’ll handle them as she sees fit. She tells Alexis to stay out of it, and don’t use her as an excuse to distract herself from Julian.
Julian tells Kim that he just broke the cardinal rule of bartending. He’s supposed to be the one listening to confessions, not giving them. She says she’s a doctor, and she’s used to it. She asks if he’s still lonely, and he says he’s talking to her. His ex got the friends in the divorce. She tells him that she lives alone with her son, and thanks to her schedule, she has no social life. She’s in the market for new friends. They introduce themselves.
Drew asks Oscar if he’s getting bullied, but he says it’s not him. Drew says it’s a little mysterious, but Oscar doesn’t want to name names, and no one is asking him to butt in. Drew prefers to call it stepping in, and says it’s admirable. He says Oscar is a good kid. Defending someone who can’t defend themselves is a good thing, and asking for help is smart. He reminds Oscar that fighting is a last recourse. The world isn’t fair, and can be a rough place. They start training again.
Josslyn comes down in a sparkly black dress. She asks what Carly thinks.
Diane asks Alexis if she wants to go to lunch. Alexis rants that she was just doing her job, and Diane tells her that Sam will calm down. Alexis says she had good intentions, but Sam made it about Julian. She says Sam is just trying to piss her off, and Diane says it worked. Diane says she thought Alexis was dating David, but Alexis says it didn’t work out, and it has nothing to do with Julian. Diane tells Alexis she didn’t say it did, and Alexis says she was thinking it. Diane says she was thinking about lunch.
Sam watches Drew talk to Oscar at the gym. Drew says he’ll teach Oscar everything he knows, but hopes he never needs to use it. He should always try to get out of a fistfight, but if that doesn’t happen, don’t back down. He needs to take care of himself. Sam asks if she missed class. Drew tells Oscar it was fun, and hopes they can do it again. Oscar leaves, and Sam asks if it was his idea or Drew’s. Drew says it was actually Oscar’s, and asks if everything went okay. Sam says the papers are signed; she and Jason are divorced. Drew asks if she told him they’re paying back every penny for Aurora. Sam says he knows, but it doesn’t matter to him. Drew says it means something to him; honor. Sam says there was one exception – Danny.
Carly takes Josslyn to the mirror, and asks what she says. Josslyn says herself in a beautiful dress. Carly sees that too, but wonders what the boys at the dance will see, and she’s not talking about Oscar. One wrong idea, and the whole school will be Snapchatting. Why let anyone shame her? Josslyn says she likes the dress. Carly tells her in a perfect world, she could wear what she wanted, and no one would make her feel bad, but the world isn’t perfect. Women need to be smarter, stronger, and tougher to make it through. Right or wrong, what they wear sends a message, and it can be taken wrong. Josslyn says she just wants to feel pretty, but Carly says she can feel pretty showing less skin. It’s not fair, but she thinks the dress could cause reactions Josslyn isn’t ready for. Slut shaming wasn’t a phrase when Carly went through it. Is she ready for that? Carly will back her, and it’s her decision, but if she’s not 100% ready to wear it and face the challenges that come with it, there’s another choice. She shows Josslyn a designer dress in Crimson. Josslyn asks if Carly would get it for her, and Carly asks if she’ll wear it. Josslyn hugs her, and says it’s a great alternative. Okay, I just need to have a mini-rant here. They should have picked a different dress. The one Josslyn is wearing has no sleeves and a V-neckline, but it shows nothing. No cleavage, it’s not short, and I can’t imagine anyone getting “slut shamed” for it, especially considering what kids wear in real life. I’m baffled as to why they chose it for an example. Okay, done.
Nathan tells Nina that he has no reason to believe Faison would harm him or Maxie. Obrecht didn’t hide him because she was worried Faison would hurt him, but didn’t want him to follow in Faison’s footsteps. Nina asks what about when he realizes Nathan isn’t what he wanted. Maxie says it’s a matter of life or death. She knows he thinks he can handle Faison, and maybe he can, but she’s asking him not to.
Peter tells Lulu the interview is somewhat incendiary. She says it has to get Faison’s attention. Hopefully, it will lead to her getting an exclusive from him to tell his side. Nathan calls her, and says she has to call it off; pull the interview. She asks why, and he says something happened; he’ll get into it later. Just make sure it doesn’t see print. She tells him it’s not that simple, but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t want to go public as being Faison’s son. Lulu tells Peter that he has to pull the interview,
Spinelli says he has PK Sinclair’s email. Very few security systems can withstand The Jackal. It was only used to exchange email with publisher. All communication ceased, but that didn’t stop the publisher from trying to contact him. He reached out again in a recent inquiry. The author didn’t respond, but there was also nothing to indicate the account was closed, and the email had been opened. Someone is monitoring the account. Sonny says that means they can communicate with them.
Sam tells Drew there’s no reason to involve lawyers. They all want what best for Danny, and there’s no reason they can’t work it out. She tells him about firing Alexis, and says they can officially get married again.
Diane takes Alexis to Charlie’s. She wants to try the avocado toast. Alexis doesn’t want to go in, but Diane doesn’t see what the big deal is. Alexis wouldn’t listen to her repeated warnings, so maybe familiarity will breed contempt.
Kim tells Julian to try the coffee maker. It works, and he asks what she did. She tells him she turned it on; the power button is in the back. Alexis and Diane see them laughing.
Oscar drops by to get Josslyn, and Carly asks if he has a suit for the dance. He thought nice jeans would be fine. Josslyn tells Carly they’re going to the library, and Carly says she expects them to be there. Josslyn says she’ll text when they need a ride. They leave, but Josslyn forgets her backpack. Carly picks it up, and condoms fall out.
Spinelli says he took the liberty of generating an email address, but no way will it point in their direction. He wonders what type of missive will generate the desired response. Perhaps he should bait the author with what he wants – Faison. Jason asks if he’s going to pretend to be Faison, but Sonny thinks it’s too risky. They might already be in contact. Just let him know he’s on their radar.
Nathan apologizes to Maxie, saying he should have told her. Maxie says no harm done. Lulu arrives at Crimson, and Maxie asks what was she thinking? Good thing the article won’t make it to print. Lulu says she tried, but she’d already turned it in. She asked Peter to intervene, but it had already been posted on the website. There’s no going back.
Spinelli asks if they’re agreed. Jason says. do it, and Spinelli tells them, hook baited. Now let’s see if they get a bite.
We see a computer screen with several windows open. One with Faison’s picture, one with Lulu’s article, and a document that says The Severed Branch – Epilogue. An email comes in. It says, love your new book. Can’t wait for the sequel.
On Monday, Ava asks Julian what’s going on, Carly talks to Kim about Oscar, and Diane asks Jason what he’s up to.
👰👰👰 Since many of the shows I watch have been on hiatus or whatever we call it now, I’ve been flipping around, checking out programs I haven’t seen. I’ve been trying to watch Sister Wives, but it’s only marginally interesting. They seem like very decent people, and obviously the family dynamics are different from the usual, but I might as well watch my relatives. Where is Mary Schmucker when I need her?
🍑 While I don’t blog about it, I somewhat keep up with The Real Housewives of Atlanta. After last week’s episode, Marlo wins for the biggest, most fabulous chandelier earrings on any Housewives show ever.
If you forgot to make a New Year’s resolution just do what we did. Write out everything you did on NYE and at the beginning write the word “stop.” – @N2KOfficial, Twitter
In her blissful ignorance, she married him. – Keith Morrison, from an episode of Dateline, but this is so many of our stories… BTW, the antagonist was convicted of “menacing.” I didn’t even know that was a thing.
No one knows what it is or how it works, but everyone wants to possess it. – Nomad (Michael Berryman), Beastmaster 2: Through the Portal of Time
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
The Walking Dead
King Ezekiel says they’re coming – bloodthirsty rogues and cutthroats, bent on their destruction – yet he smiles. The Kingdom tromps trough the woods. Ezekiel notes that Carol smiles. They keep walking, Ezekiel leading them like a bloodhound. They hear whistling, and raise their hands as they’re approached by Saviors. Carol says they have the numbers, but we have the strategy. Suddenly, there’s a gun battle, with the Saviors being the losers. Ezekiel says it brings hope to the heart, maybe unwisely. Keep to their plan and training, and the fates may smile and allow this dream. They won’t lose, not one of their ranks. Ezekiel walks among the dead Saviors. He tells Carol, not one. Shiva growls.
Morales tells Rick, guns down. He remarks that this whole time it was him. Rick tells him the fight is out there; it’s just him in there. Morales says he knows who Rick is, and it wasn’t any blast from the past to see him. They both came from there to here. He calls Rick a monster. He called the Saviors back because Rick is a prize, Morales asks why he’s there? Why is there always a guy willing to rush in; why? What’s Rick looking for? He says Rick has nothing to say, even though he’s not giving Rick a chance to say anything, and just keeps barraging him with questions. Morales says it doesn’t matter. What’s left is coming to get him. Whether they get him to Negan or not, his sh*t is going to be settled. He calls Rick “peaches,” and I wonder if that’s Rick’s stripper name.
Outside, the battle goes on. God forgive me, someone falls, and I laugh. Some Saviors run back inside. Lots of shooting is still happening, and a little feeding as the dead rise.
Aaron gets Eric to a tree out of the line of fire. Aaron says there’s an exit wound, so that’s good. He’ll get Eric to the Kingdom’s doctor. He tells Eric he’s sorry. Eric asks if he’s the one who shot him. Aaron says pulled Eric into it when he didn’t want to fight. Eric says, until he did. He tells Aaron to go and help the others; they need him. Aaron starts to cry. Eric says Aaron knows he loves him, and tells Aaron to get back to the fight; they can win this thing. Aaron says we will, and tells Eric he loves him and always has. He leaves, giving Eric a gun.
On the road, Jesus’s group walks on, with the Savior prisoners tied together by a rope. One of the soldiers tells Tara they’ll take the Savior prisoners back to Maggie; she’ll know what to do with them. Tara says she knows what they did. Walking next to Morgan, Jared starts whistling, and Morgan pokes him with the staff. I’d do that on a good day if he started that whistling next to me. Jesus says it’s not far to Hilltop; they’ve made the decision. Morgan insists nothing has been decided, and Jesus says nothing is permanent, but they’re taking the Saviors to Hilltop. Morgan says he knows how dangerous this is, and who these people are. Jesus tells him no matter what they’ve done, they’re people. He and Morgan have killed, but they don’t execute. Morgan says, not here.
Rick asks Morales if his family is there, but Morales says they didn’t make it to Birmingham. Rick says he’s sorry; he’s lost people too – Lori, Shane, Andrea, Glenn. Negan killed Glenn; forced him to his knees and bashed in his head in front of his pregnant wife; Maggie is his widow. He asks if Morales is Negan too. Morales says he lost his family, and lost his mind, waiting to become nothing, and the Saviors found him. They thought he was worth a damn and worth bringing back, so yeah, he’s Negan. To make it this far for this long, there has to be something. Morales says they’re the same; two a-holes, doing whatever they have to, to keep going. The only difference is that he’s the one holding the gun. That makes him luckier. If it was Rick holding the gun, his brains would already be on the floor. Rick tells Morales that he doesn’t know that. He wouldn’t want to, and would do the best he could to try and find another way. Morales thinks he can talk all he wants, but they’re all dead. Somewhere along the way, Officer Friendly died with them, just like he did.
Rick says, no, and Daryl shoots Morales in the back with his crossbow before Rick can protest. Rick says Daryl didn’t know who it was, but Daryl says, it don’t matter. He asks if Rick found guns, and Rick says the guns aren’t there. They gotta get out before –
Too late. They’re here.
Jared says there’s something different about Morgan. It’s his armor, like it shrunk. He realizes it’s Benjamin’s armor, and asks why Morgan would wear it, since the kid didn’t do sh*t for him. Morgan points the staff at Jared, but their altercation is interrupted by zombies rolling down the hill next to them, and landing in the road. There’s a wide variety, some barely more than skeletons. More zombies roll down, and a bunch of Saviors start running, but it’s awkward when you’re tied together.
Some of the Saviors run into the woods. Morgan tails them. One of them falls, Morgan catches up, and shoots another one. Jesus stops him from shooting any more. Morgan tells him the Saviors are never going to change, and Jesus says they’ll find another way; Maggie will. Morgan says she’ll want them dead after what they’ve done. Jesus says they’ll have to live with them after. They have to find a way to peace. He puts his hand on Morgan’s shoulder, and Morgan knocks Jesus back. They fight.
Ezekiel reminds his band that those they extinguished are just part of the compound. But their first victory will allow their second, and their second will deliver their third.
Daryl and Rick run through the building, getting shot at periodically. There’s a mini gun battle in the hallway.
Jesus and Morgan kick each other’s asses. Morgan tries to hit Jesus with his staff, but Jesus is pretty nimble, and does some amazing bobbing and weaving. Morgan finally gets a good whack in, but then Jesus drop kicks him. Morgan comes close to stabbing him with the pointy end of the staff.
Daryl says he’s out. Rick sees a fire extinguisher across the hall, and shoots it. The white stuff sprays all over the place, and while the Saviors are trying to get their bearings, Rick and Daryl grab the Savior’s guns, and jet the hell out.
Morgan and Jesus continue fighting. Ain’t nobody got time for this. They struggle over the staff, and Jesus gets the staff. He tosses it back to Morgan, and in gratitude, Morgan points it at Jesus’s throat. The rest of the group gets closer, and Morgan backs off. He says he’s not right, but that doesn’t make him wrong, which sounds like the title of a TylerPerry movie. Morgan says he can’t be a part of this. Tara says he is right. Morgan picks up a gun, and strides off, looking at the bodies.
At Hilltop, Enid looks out and says, it’s him. Gregory bangs on the door, saying he needs help; he’s been through hell, and he knows they can hear him. Maggie opens gate a little bit, and asks what he’s doing with Gabriel’s car? Gregory says he doesn’t know Gabriel, and the car was there. He says he lives there, adding that some of them didn’t just show up, which is probably the wrong thing to say to Maggie right now. She says he sold out, and he says he tried to save lives; it was Negan who made him say horrible things. He went to the Saviors, furthering diplomacy. Some people would call it heroic. Maggie says he was looking out for himself, and tried to betray them. Gregory tells her that he caused no harm; Negan already knew everything. Maggie tells him goodbye, and he says okay, he was scared. He knew they couldn’t win a fight against Negan, but didn’t want to be seen as complicit. He sees now that he can’t be reasoned with.
She starts to walk away, and he says he made a mistake, and he’s sorry. They’re all just human beings with faults, flaws, and fears. Is this who she is? Has she no mercy, humanity, or charity? He asks her to open the gate, and open her heart. Don’t leave a human out to die. Maggie turns around, and says, let him in. He’s not worth killing, not yet anyway. Gregory says he’s a believer now. Cal calls down that Jesus is here. Gregory tells her not to let him in with the Saviors; she’ll put their safety in jeopardy. She says, Gregory, go! like he’s a dog.
Maggie wonders what they’ll do with the Saviors, and Jesus says there are empty trailers out back that they can be locked in. He says they surrendered. They can’t let them go, but they can’t kill them.
Back at the outpost, the shooting is over, but the dead who have turned are feeding. Daryl starts killing the new zombies off, and Rick takes Polaroids. Wtf? They load their wounded into a truck, and clean up as best they can. What’s with Rick taking photos? Did Instagram survive the apocalypse? He writes a note.
Aaron goes back to the tree, but Eric is gone. He sees the gun on the ground, and calls out to him. There’s a lot of blood at the base of the tree. He looks across the road, and sees Eric ambling toward his new people, the undead. Aaron cries, and one of the group takes his arm, saying, it’s not him. He leads Aaron away.
Rick brings out the baby. Aaron says he’ll take her to Hilltop, where she’ll be safe. He and Eric were going there to update Maggie. Yep, babysitting a newborn ought to take his mind off his troubles. Rick gives him the baby, saying her name is Gracie. (Last week, on Talking Dead, Andrew Lincoln had said the baby would be fine.)
Rick sees Daryl, and they’re about to confer, when someone shoots at them. They duck and hide. Rick calls out, saying they’re alone, and he knows the shooter is too. There’s not enough room behind the tree for more than one. He says a herd is coming – just sayin’. They can make a deal. Drop the gun and come out. Tell them what they need to know, take the car, and live. Todd’s voice asks why he should trust them. Rick says he gives Todd his word. There’s isn’t much that’s worth anything anymore, but a man’s word should mean something. Todd comes limping out, and asks what they want to know. Rick asks about the guns. Todd says the guns aren’t there. They had them for a while, and they were sent to another outpost yesterday. Rick asks which one, and Todd says McGavin (I think), west of there. He asks if he can go now, and Daryl shoots him. Geez.
Ezekiel is still smiling. Everyone is accounted for, and he smiles even more broadly. He tells Carol, notone. She tells them to sweep the compound. Ezekiel says, we or they; one or the other. She heads toward the buildings, and Ezekiel suddenly yells, scatter! Gunfire comes from the tower window.
The Kingdom people drop like flies. Several of them block King Ezekiel from getting hit, at the expense of their own lives.
Next time, Ezekiel says they face a dire challenge; they will fight and they will bleed – lives hang in the balance. Carol is captured.
👓 Jordan Woods-Robinson, who played Eric, is also a member of Blue Man Group.
👱 Didn’t want this, but I’m starting to understand what’s on the menu now. We can hide like these people, we can keep trying to serve The Saviors, and I can watch you get randomly beaten every so often, or else we can fight. So, here we are. And being with you, well it makes abject terror tolerable. – Eric to Aaron
🍑 The Real Housewives of Atlanta started its new season tonight, along with Married to Medicine, but I decided to take a break from these shrews women. My real life, such as it is, has been extra busy lately, so if I watch these, it will be in a half-assed way, like while I’m doing three other things. I did catch most of Atlanta tonight. Kenya claimed to have gotten her fairytale ending, having gotten married over the break, and showed off her gorgeous ring, as well as pictures of the ceremony. Are they divorced yet? Phaedra got fired over the litigious accusations she made about Kandi last season. We’re still stuck with Porsha though. She now has a podcast, where she says she’s unplugged and unedited. If she considers herself plugged and edited on this show, I can’t imagine. I did a double-take when, after being told men could father children at any age, Porsha thought the children might come out looking old. Seriously, is this an act? No one can be this stupid, right? Right? NeNe now has a store that carries clothing for “women who eat, and women who don’t eat.” Cynthia is fifty, single, and alone. Don’t cry for me, Argentina. She’s fabulous and has a home on a lake that looks like it’s out of a magazine. Sheree hasn’t been interesting since her who gonna check me, boo? days. She said she doesn’t want to have bad energy around her, and I have some advice. Leave. Now. Kandi is busy with the baby and the OLG restaurant. And her new show, Xscape: Still Kickin’ It, that premiered after Atlanta. It’s a limited (I think six part) gig, so catch it while you can.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Michael goes to Nelle’s office. He tells her she’s the perfect assistant. She has a gift for being all things to all people.
Nina relaxes in the sauna. Maxie comes in, and says Nina is going to rehire her at Crimson.
At the hospital, Monica teases Nathan about Man Landers. He tells her that he’s quitting the advice business. It was more all-consuming than he anticipated, and he wants to concentrate on his family and real job. Monica says it’s good he has his priorities in order.
Ava looks up old Jason online, and says that explains Franco’s interest. Griff knocks at the door, and asks if she’s ready for dinner. She tells him she forgot.
Danny asks why Jason is dressed up. He says it’s an important night, and they want to explain it to him and Scout. He says things are changing for their family. Danny asks if it’s a good change, and Sam says very good.
Sonny goes through the safe house with his gun drawn. He says, you went to a lot of trouble to get me here; show yourself. Patient 6 says, Sonny, and Sonny sees him on the stairs, his gun also drawn. Sonny asks who the hell he is; he looks exactly like Jason. Patient 6 says that’s who he is. Sonny says someone else has said he was Jason for the last two-years. Patient 6 says, come on, you know it’s me.
Nathan tells Monica that he has to interview a DUI patient. She says that Man Landers is going to be missed. Nathan sees Amy. She asks how Maxie took the news he’s retiring, but he hasn’t had a chance to tell her.
Nina says Maxie is stalking her. Maxie hands her an employment package she drew up for herself. She says any magazine would kill for the exclusive she has to offer – Inside the World of Ask Man Landers.
Nelle asks what Michael means, and he says it’s just an observation. She knew exactly how to act in every situation, from revealing herself as Josslyn’s kidney donor to being Carly’s assistant. His parents should have seen her coming, but they didn’t because she was so convincing. She wonders why he’s dredging this up now. He tells her that he just found out she spent a year in a mental hospital.
Griff suggests hanging out and ordering in. Ava thinks he wants to avoid being seen with her in public.
Jason explains media to Danny, and how they’ll be working out of an office now. Danny asks if he can help, and suggests an issue about dogs. I second that. Jason wants all the kids to help, and when they grow up. the company will be theirs if they want it. Danny thinks it sounds cool. Sam has no idea how much she wanted this until Jason made it happen.
Sonny says if he was Jason, he would have blown Sonny’s head off before he could blink. Real Jason says he’s not going to shoot him. Sonny asks why the gun, and he says he thought Sonny would have him along. He seems like the type to shoot first and ask questions later, and he thought he’d have to hold him off while he explained. Sonny says explain it to him; where has he been?
Griff tells Ava staying in would avoid awkward questions, and she says people might get the wrong idea and assume they’re a couple. He apologizes, saying he didn’t think she’d take it that way. She says imagine the harm he could do if he tried. He takes her hand, saying he’s clumsy, and apologizes again.
Nelle doesn’t like talking about it, since she thought she’d be judged, and she’s feeling that way now. Michael says he’s the last person who would hold mental illness against anyone. She says she’s not mentally ill, but had a breakdown. She wanted to put it behind her and forget. He asks why she had a breakdown.
Sam can’t believe this is going to be their business. Jason asks if she’s scared, and she says she’s exhilarated and it’s crazy jumping into the unknown. What if they fail? Jason tells her that they won’t. After everything they’ve been through, they can do anything as long as they’re together.
Sonny says five years is a long time, and Real Jason says it wasn’t five years for him. He woke up in a Russian clinic where they kept drugging him. It feels like he was there six months at most, and he worked on a plan to escape. Sonny asks why he didn’t call, and he says he gave the number to another patient. Sonny realizes it was Ava, and Real Jason says she gave the number to Dr. Klein. He tells Sonny that “they” were paying Klein to keep him drugged up and under control. When Sonny asks who’s “they,” Real Jason has no idea.
Maxie tells Nina it’s an inside look at what it’s like to be married to hottest, sexiest internet sensation. Nina wanted some peace, but knows it’s not going to happen, and tells Maxie to proceed. Maxie is going to focus on their fabulous marriage and true partnership. Nina says she was never part of the brand. Maxie says she contributes the glamour. They’ll take pictures of the apartment, and her, in couture outfits. Nina asks if she’s told Nathan, and Maxie says he’s on board and welcoming it with both well-muscled arms.
Amy video chats with Chet. She introduces him to Nathan, saying he’s the real Man Landers, and no, they’re just friends. She tells him she’ll call him back when she gets a break. She asks Nathan if he’s ever had the feeling that you know something is for the best, but it means giving up something you enjoyed. You have the satisfaction of doing the right thing, but the sadness of letting go. He knows the feeling.
Nelle says Michael wouldn’t understand, and he tells her to try him. She says she’s afraid to get hurt, so she runs from pain and lies to avoid it, and sometimes the lies make things worse. She didn’t have a fancy hospital or loving parents, so she ran as fast and long as she could, and crashed. She begs him to stop digging in her past.
Griff doesn’t pretend to know ins and outs of dating, and Ava says that he’s clearly an amateur, and she’s the relationship version of training wheels. He tells her that she’s reading too much into him suggesting take-out. She says that she’s busy anyway. He did hurt her feelings, but that’s not why she wants to cancel. Griff asks what’s so important, and she says getting answers about him, and shows Griff the sketch.
Sam tells (what do I call him now?) Other Jason that besides making a formal announcement, they’ll have to work the room. She asks him questions that people might ask, like how long he’s been considering the purchase. He says for a while, and she asks why not get more into the PI business? He tells her it was fun until people started shooting at him. He knew Julian would have a lot of legal bills, and might be ready to sell. He tells her their tastes are well beyond Julian’s, and the more he thought about it, the more he thought it was worth doing. Sam wonders if they’re asking for trouble.
Sonny asks how Real Jason got back to Port Charles, and he says he had a lot of help. He tells Sonny that he made an escape attempt too soon, and explains about the paperclip, and how Ava helped him. He says once he made it out, a priest helped him to stow away on a ship, but there were two mercenaries waiting for him in New York. He knocked them out, and took their guns and cash, but they’re still looking for him. Sonny wonders why he’d go to Ava, and not him. Real Jason says he did come to him.
Michael tells Nelle that he wasn’t looking for dirt; he was trying to prove her innocence. Nelle says she’s made mistakes and tried to leave them in past. The last thing she needs is her mistakes being resurrected and thrown in her face. She asks what if the roles were reversed? Is there something he hasn’t told her? He says he’d feel defensive, and there is something. She asks why he’s never told her, and he says the time never seemed right. Nelle says neither one of them has given full disclosure. She forgives him, but can he forgive her?
Ava explains to Griff that the picture is the man from the clinic. Griff asks where the sketch came from, and she says a random third party. Patient 6 is here, and it’s crazy, but they ran into each other by accident. When she mentioned Jason, he asked a lot of questions. Now she knows why. She shows Griff the headline about Jason being presumed dead. She says, apparently, he’s Jason too.
Sam asks Other Jason what if people think he’s getting back into the business. He says they’re not going to let their past keep them from the future they want. There’s a knock at the door, and it’s Monica looking for grandchildren. She explains Olivia-Q will be taking care of them while she goes to the party. In honor of tonight, she has something to give Jason from her and his father.
Real Jason tells Sonny that he went to his house first and let himself in. Sonny says the security codes have been changed, but Real Jason says he knew how to override them from Spinelli. He heard a guard say Sonny was gone, so he left. Sonny asks why he didn’t wait, but Real Jason says he didn’t know how long Sonny would be gone, so he did something stupid. He went to see Sam. He didn’t think it was fair for him to just show up, but he did. She wasn’t home, so he picked the lock. When he got inside, it didn’t feel like five years, more like five minutes; the time he lost hit him all at once. He couldn’t breathe, and went out on the terrace. When Sam came home, he was about to go in, but then he showed up. It didn’t take him long to figure out he was her husband, but had no idea Sam thinks it’s him.
Michael says he forgives Nelle. Her past is her own. Until she wants to share it, he’ll respect her privacy, but he needs to be able to trust what she says. He tells her now that’s settled, and they have a theater date. Nelle finishes up, and Michael gets a call about talking to the media about fracking. He asks who set this up?
Amy tells Nathan that Chet doesn’t know how his medical expenses were covered. He thinks the VA paid for everything. Nathan hopes she gets credit one day for everything she’s done. There are a lot of clueless bro’s out there who are now better off because of her.
Nina tells Maxie that she’s trying to read the employment package, but it’s wet. She knows the numbers are unacceptable though. She’s already factored more in. Maxie says Nina let her pitch her heart out in the steam room, when she knew she was rehiring her. Nina says she’s right, but she wanted to hear Maxie’s spiel. She thinks the Man Landers story is a great idea. She respects Maxie’s friendship with Lulu, but asks her to have the same courtesy and respect her marriage to Valentin. Maxie promises to stay out of it. She asks what changed Nina’s mind. Nina says not what, but who. It was her new boss, Jason.
Ava tells Griff that Patient 6 saw the picture of Avery, and knew Sonny’s house. He asked her to take a note to Sonny, who was a bastard like she knew he’d be. By the time she came back, Patient 6 was gone, and had left her a note. Griff asks if he signed it, and she says no, but she saw Franco sketching him. He’d said it was how Jason used to look before his facial reconstruction, so she swiped a sketch, and came back to do research. She says Patient 6 looks more like Jason than Jason did.
Jason opens the box, and it’s a pair of cufflinks. Monica explains it’s an Ouroboros, a snake consuming itself. It symbolizes rebirth, a move forward to consume the past, like what they’re doing. She knows Alan would want him to have them. He adored Jason, and his biggest regret was that they didn’t reconnect. She’s relieved he’s broken things off with Sonny and not working with him again. Other Jason says the things he did at twenty don’t serve him as an adult. Monica says it’s a new beginning, and she’s happy for them. She thanks him for choosing a new and better life. Geez, why does he looks so grim?
Real Jason tells Sonny that he could hear in Sam’s voice how much loves him. Sonny says Sam thinks she’s married to him. Real Jason says he put it together when Ava said Jason bought the media company, and she told him about the accident and how Carly figured out this guy was Jason. Sonny says there was DNA proof, and he knew things only Jason would know. Real Jason says he’s Jason. Sonny knows that, doesn’t he? He’s Sonny’s best friend and brother. He has to tell him that he knows him.
Nathan and Maxie meet in the steam room. She wanted to celebrate in private. He asks what they’re celebrating. She says she has good news, and Nathan says he has something too. She wants him to go first. He says he’s done. No more intrusive fans or obnoxious tweets. His time as Ask Man Landers is officially over. Maxie tells him, no it’s not. He has to continue.
Nina sees Michael at Crimson. She gets a text, and says her stepdaughter is requesting she come to a tea party. She tells Michael that she’ll see him later at the launch party, but he says he and Nelle’s tickets are for tonight. He thanks her for pulling strings so they could get them, and she wishes she could say he’s welcome, but she didn’t do it. He says he must have misunderstood. She tells him congratulations; the tickets are difficult to get. She leaves, and Michael gets a text from Carly asking if he’s moving in with Nelle, and that Nelle implied they were.
Ava tells Griff that she thought about going to Sonny, but he thinks every word from her is a lie. Griff thinks maybe he could talk to Sonny, but Ava asks what he’ll say. Some man is running around with Jason’s face? She thinks if Patient 6 wants to get in touch with Sonny, he will; he seems impossible to stop. Griff asks if she thinks he’s dangerous, and she says he told her that he and Sonny are friends. Griff says what if he’s lying, and she asks if he struck Griff as a liar, but he has no idea.
Sam asks if Other Jason is wearing the cufflinks. He says they mean a lot. He likes the symbolism, and likes that they belonged to his father. Alan was a good man, and he should have done better by him. Sam says it was a difficult situation. Jason says he was difficult. He fought to get away from Alan, and doesn’t know why. Sam says it’s time to make the formal announcement. He asks if she’s ready, and she says she is, as long as she’s by his side.
Sonny tells Real Jason that he’s been calling another guy Jason for two years, and what about the DNA? Real Jason can’t explain it. He knows nothing about him; he doesn’t even know himself. He went to work for Sonny in 1996. Sonny taught him everything he knows about business and most of what he knows about life. He’d never turn his back on Sonny, and would never start a media company. Somebody shot him in the back. Sonny tells him to stop. He puts down the gun. He shakes Real Jason’s hand, and says he knows it’s him. They hug.
Tomorrow, Molly tells Alexis no drama, Andre says Franco is getting closer to the truth, and Michael calls Nelle out about another lie.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey
Teresa and her father cook pork chops. The girls are going crazy, and grandpa says, mama mia, don’t scream. Teresa says she’s essentially a single mother, her dad is living with her now, and her mind is never going to be carefree. Her mother has been gone a month. She says the kids have been through a lot. It breaks her heart.
Dolores visits Siggy. Siggy tells her about lunch with Margaret. Dolores doesn’t trust her. Siggy says Margaret gave her a dig, saying everyone thinks she’s a yes person, including Teresa. In her interview, she doesn’t know where Teresa gets off calling her an ass kisser. She asks what to do next, and Siggy says hear Teresa out. She’s having a jewelry/handbag party. She thinks they should talk, but not with claws out.
Margaret and Joe #3 go to Melissa and Joe #2’s house for dinner. Melissa says she wants the story of how they met, and Joe #2 does a funny imitation of Margaret flirting with Joe #3. They decide to play pool. They kick the kids off the table, and Joe #3 breaks. Margaret says her lunch with Siggy started off rough, and Siggy cried like, five times. She says she felt badly, but they let the conversation happen. Melissa wonders where her apology is, since it was her birthday. Margaret thinks you shouldn’t cry over a cake, but Siggy is getting hormone pellets in her butt soon. Joe #3 says once they go through menopause, it’s all over.
Siggy unpacks groceries as she talks to son Josh. He’s sleeping at his girlfriend’s house. In her interview, she says she wants the opportunity to be a cool mom. She asks if he thinks Josh and his girlfriend will be going to school together, but he doesn’t want to talk about it. He hasn’t decided where he wants to go yet. She asks if it’s that painful to talk to his mom; she wants more than one-word answers. He asks why she’s upset, and she starts crying. She says everything she does annoys him, and she can’t give any more. In her interview, she wonders what if he goes away and forgets about her? He extracts himself quickly and I don’t blame him.
Teresa helps Milania with her spelling. Melissa drops by with cupcakes. Milania asks if she can miss dance on Saturday. In her interview Melissa says Teresa has her hands full, but she’s like Mr. Softy with the kids. Melissa tells her about Joe #2 buying the restaurant, but she knows already. Melissa is frustrated finding out she’s the last to know. She doesn’t know how he thinks he’ll have the time. Teresa says she was willing to kick in. Melissa thinks going into business with family is a bad idea, and doesn’t know what Joe was thinking.
At the office, Margaret’s mom talks about old friend Bob, who’s a friend with benefits. They’ve been sexting, but are getting together IRL. In her interview, Margaret says her mom is an out of control party girl, and she sometimes wishes she was raised by wolves. Her mother married young, left her father when she was two, and they basically raised each other, but her mom always came through for the kids. She knew she was loved even though they didn’t have a lot. Her mother says she’s not afraid of sex, and everyone goes, whoa, because they don’t want to hear it.
Siggy calls to invite Margaret to the party, but she’s going to be in Vegas. She says since Siggy is a relationship expert, maybe Siggy can help her mom find someone new to sext.
Teresa, Melissa, and Danielle meet for dinner. Danielle asks if anyone has heard or seen from Siggy and Dolores. In her interview, Danielle says she doesn’t want to create drama, but Dolores told her something about Teresa that wasn’t too nice. If Dolores doesn’t come clean, she’s going to have to say something herself. Teresa says Siggy apologized, and Melissa says still nothing for her. In her interview, Melissa tells us that she doesn’t even get sloppy thirds. Teresa says Milania gave her a headache, and Melissa says she knows how to work Teresa. She doesn’t want the girls to be mad at her, and needs to put her foot down. In her interview, Teresa is pissed that Melissa is telling her how to parent.
Teresa visits Joe #2’s new restaurant. She’s brought pictures. He wants to enhance the place, and asks what she wants to do first. He wants it to be about family. Melissa joins them. He says must be nice to roll in late, and Melissa says she runs a business and has three kids. Teresa thinks she should have delegated. She’s still annoyed about Melissa saying she should be stricter with her kids. Joe would like Teresa to be in the kitchen, and Melissa says she’ll hostess. Teresa asks if she’d waitress, and Melissa says no. Teresa thinks Melissa will just hang out on the weekends and drink wine. They bicker. In his interview, Joe says they’re making him nervous. He thought this sh*t was over. He tells them no more of this stuff, and Melissa says they started it.
Siggy is helping Dolores stage the house for selling it. Her boyfriend wants to move closer. She sees a future with him, and he doesn’t mind that she lives with Frank. Siggy says she’s having anxiety about Josh leaving, and he gets irritated with everything. Dolores says he has a lot going on inside with leaving his girlfriend; she went through the same thing with Frankie. She tells Siggy to let it go.
Teresa organizes Milania’s slime collection with her. She says whoever invented slime is no good. Milania emails her dad. It breaks Teresa’s heart that Joe #1 is missing all the little moments, and they need him. It’s time they’ll never get back. She thinks Milania doesn’t need more discipline, but more attention and love When Teresa asks for a hug, Milania jets.
Tons of women gather for Siggy’s party. Dolores is early because Siggy wanted to introduce her around. Siggy is frustrated with Melissa, who she thinks owes her an apology.
Teresa has her makeup done. Danielle picks her up. Man, prison time looks good on Teresa – she looks amazing. Danielle asks if she’s heard from Dolores, and Teresa says no. Danielle tells Teresa that Dolores said something not so nice about her – she’s not concerned about anything or anyone more than money, and be careful. She was hoping Dolores would come clean. Teresa is shocked. She wonders why Dolores would say that to Danielle. She can’t even comprehend it. She can’t wait to confront her about it. Danielle says good friends don’t say things like that.
Siggy thanks everyone for coming, and hawks the bags. Wow. That’s a lot of bags. Melissa arrives. She wonders what the deal is, since she hasn’t heard from them. Siggy says she was livid at the birthday party, and Melissa says she was relentless at the table, calling them names. After what happened, they were freaked out, and thought she’d call the next morning saying she’d had one too many. Siggy says in a million years, she’d never throw a beautiful cake across the floor. Melissa says sorry; she’ll buy her a cake. In her interview, Melissa says, we ate the cake, threw the cake, the cake is done. Siggy makes an announcement for everyone to shut up. She asks if they had a beautiful, three-tiered cake given to them for their birthday, how many people think throwing it across the room would be rude? Show of hands. Omg, really? No surprise, everyone agrees. She says who does that? Dolores has no idea why she did this. Siggy lies on the floor in front of Melissa, and says it’s all she wanted. Melissa is completely embarrassed. She doesn’t know anyone, and is surprised she’s even still there. Me too. I would have left.
Teresa gets there, and Melissa tells her and Danielle what just happened. Teresa is like, no she didn’t, but is glad it wasn’t her. She says family comes first, and no one is humiliating her SIL. She confronts Siggy, and Siggy says she was upset. Teresa says they ate the cake. They were having fun, and the stuff she said was horrible. She asks why Dolores was quiet, and Dolores says Siggy was upset. In her interview, Dolores says she has a history of being a loyal friend, but can’t say the same for everybody. She says she’s been sticking up for Teresa a long time, and would never let anyone talk about her.
Danielle repeats what Dolores said to her. Dolores jumps up, and calls her a m-effing liar, and a crazy scumbag. She gets in Danielle’s face. Danielle says she has no ulterior motive and nothing to gain from saying it. Dolores tells Teresa that Danielle is a starving, hungry bitch, and she’d never say that. Teresa needs to sleep with one eye open, because Danielle is up to no good. Methinks Dolores got real hot real fast because Danielle speaks the truth.
Delores says she has no history of stabbing Teresa in the back. She tells Teresa she has a choice; believe her or Danielle. In her interview Teresa says Dolores has been distant, and she and Danielle might have a crazy past, but they’re getting along great now. She asks why Danielle would lie. Dolores keeps calling Danielle crazy, and Danielle is like, thanks for the diagnosis. She says Danielle isn’t hard to diagnose. In her interview, Danielle says Dolores is clearly guilty; Helen Keller could see she’s lying. Danielle leaves the room, and Teresa and Melissa follow.
Danielle is all weepy, and Teresa asks what’s wrong. She tells Teresa that she was telling the truth. Back in the other room, Dolores tells Siggy that Danielle is out for revenge. In the past, Teresa created a lot of problems for her, and she’d better watch her ass. All of a sudden, it’s water under the bridge? She doesn’t think so. Danielle tells Teresa she’s shaken and wants to go home. Teresa and Melissa say they’ll go too. Teresa tells Siggy that she’s taking Danielle home. Delores says she’s afraid for Teresa; something’s not right. In her interview, Melissa doesn’t know how Dolores and Siggy can be so dismissive. Every time Siggy cries, they have to bow down and comfort her, and she’s still waiting for her apology. Dolores says if she wasn’t Teresa’s friend, she wouldn’t have warned her.
Next time, Joe #2 sees his name in lights, Melissa and Teresa argue, Gia agrees with Melissa, and Siggy criticizes Margaret.
😒 Officially not liking Siggy. She needs to get those hormones stat. Maybe the OC’s Shannon can go with her.
🏡 Tonight was the finale of Channel Zero: No End House. It was very weird and I enjoyed it, but I still have no idea what it was supposed to be about. Since a decision had to be made, I’ve chosen the viewpoint that it was an allegory about coming of age in suburbia. The next chapter will be served in 2018, with Channel Zero: Butcher’s Block.
Sad News…
😢 Okay, maybe it only made me sad. Tinsley and Scott have broken up. …sniff….
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Stella lambastes Jordan in the middle of the police station, listing every foul thing she’s ever done. Jordan tells everyone to get back to work, and asks Stella to step into her office. Stella says, oh, now she has shame. She didn’t when she cheated on Tommy, and passed off TJ as his son.
Michael tells Nelle he had a great time, but he has to be at work early. She calls him the responsible one, and he says Josslyn is the same way.
Meanwhile, at Carly’s place, Josslyn is on the phone with Carly, saying that Trina’s parents are home; what could go wrong? Trina shows up with beer. Well, that, for one thing.
Sam tells Monica she has to get to Puerto Rico tonight, and asks if she can keep the kids a little longer.
In Puerto Rico, Carly wants to go out for some air, and opens the door to Wavy Gravy, who points a gun at her, and clichély says, nobody move or someone is gonna die. I figure his name is probably meaningless anyway, since he’s a disposable character.
Trina tells Josslyn to put all the breakables in her mom’s room, and they probably should lock some of the rooms. She suggest that they dip into the liquor cabinet, thinking Carly will be too distracted from her trip to notice the bottle levels.
Nelle says that both she and Josslyn are lucky to have Michael in their lives. He’s looking forward to more nights like this. She kisses him, and then apologizes. He says he’s not sorry. He tells her that he’ll call her. After she goes inside, he can’t believe he said something so trite, and in her apartment, Nelle can’t believe she apologized. There’s a knock at the door. She opens it, and careens right into Michael. She asks if he’d like to come inside for a bit, and he says he’d like that for a bit.
Sam gives Monica instructions. Monica says they’ll be fine; it’s Sam she’s worried about. She wonders why Sam wants to go to Puerto Rico. Sam says Sonny is in trouble. Jason went to rescue him, and she’s going to rescue Jason.
Grinchy tells Sonny to sit, but wants Carly close by. Sonny isn’t too happy about that, and Gustaf says that Sonny’s people put his brother in the ground last year, and he came to return the favor. Okay, this name game might be fun.
Jordan says she’s made mistakes, but Stella hasn’t walked in her shoes. She never intentionally hurt anyone. Stella says she guesses Jordan hopping into bed with another man wasn’t intentional, and calls Jordan a dishonest, lying, faithless Jezebel. Curtis appears, and says, that’s enough. I’d say so.
In a private room, Curtis tells Stella that airing the family’s dirty laundry and causing a scene isn’t like her. She says she never thought they’d be in a situation like this. Curtis says that TJ is worried about her. Stella wonders how any of them can’t be upset. She says if her sister wasn’t dead, this would have killed her. TJ was all they had left, and Jordan let them live with a lie. Curtis says it was a lie of compassion. Jordan joins them, saying that she was trying to protect Thomas. Stella says she was trying to protect herself. If she hadn’t been unfaithful, Thomas would still be alive. She took everything, and now she took TJ too.
Josslyn freaks when she hears Trina inviting guys. She says she’s never done this before, but Trina says she’s got this. She even invited Josslyn’s crush, Oscar, the new kid at school. A group of kids come to the door, yelling party! and bearing liquor. Oscar brings up the rear, and he’s pretty cute.
Michael makes tea, and Nelle says she should be the one waiting on him. She says growing up with siblings must have been nice. Michael says they weren’t The Brady Bunch, but Nelle says it was still a family, and they had love. She wonders what his family is going to say when they find out they’re seeing each other. Michael says they will, because they’re not going to hide it. Nelle says he has more to lose than she does.
Monica tells Sam that Jason is pretty adept of taking care of himself. Being pragmatic, if there’s imminent danger, there’s nothing they can do, and if Sam walks into it, what about the kids? Sam says she hates that Jason left her and the kids to help Sonny. Monica says he’ll never break his loyalty, so just hope he did what he had to do and is on his way back.
Gargoyle tells Sonny that he gets to see someone he loves take their last breath; not exactly the same, but close enough. Sonny says the difference is that he and Carly are going on their feet, and his brother was on his knees, begging. Gobstopper lunges for him, but Carly whacks him on the head, and he and Sonny struggle.
Nelle gives Michael some cookies. He asks if she likes the tea, and says he could make her something different, but she tells him that he shouldn’t fuss over her. She’s concerned about how Carly is going to react, but he suggests that when they’re on a date, they not talk about other people with opinions. The only opinions he cares about are the two of theirs, and his opinion of her is great. He tells her that he’s happy she’s in his life too.
Trina gives Josslyn’s party guests a couple of rules, and suggests Josslyn talk to Oscar. Josslyn says she will later, and asks why Trina invited so many people. Trina thinks it’s a minimal number, and says Oscar is obviously into Josslyn, since he keeps looking at her. Someone yells hot tub! and the kids go outside. Except for Oscar.
Curtis says blood don’t make family. TJ is theirs, and nothing will change that. Knowing different doesn’t mean different. He asks Stella if it robs her of any memories or if she loves him any less. Stella says she promised to take care of the family, and now look at them. It’s only a matter of time before Curtis gone too. Jordan destroyed their family, and he’s either too blind or too stupid to get it.
Monica wonders what’s up with Sam that she’s not taking things in stride. Sam says Jason removed himself from Sonny’s world more than once. They were building a new life with their kids, but they’re trapped, and there’s nothing they can do.
Carly tells Sonny to get down, and shoots at Gunderson. She misses, and he comes after her, but is shot from behind by our hero Jason. Told you Gorgo wouldn’t be around long.
Stella approaches TJ at work. He asks if she’s okay. She says it’s been a long night, and she’s sorry. He says he is too, and it’s a lot to process. He just found out last year, and had to process it too. He asks if she saw Jordan, and she says she went to the station. He informs her that they have policemen and jail cells there. Ha-ha! Stella says they had an exchange, and TJ says, I’ll bet.
Jordan tells Curtis that she knew it was going to happen, but didn’t think it would be in the squad room. He says at least it’s over. She says far from it; Stella hates her. Curtis says that’s nothing new, and Jordan says she’ll hate him too – as long as he’s with her.
Nelle and Michael discuss the concert. She says it was interesting to hear Avant-garde classical music in Port Charles. She also didn’t realize nails on a blackboard was considered music. (Was it John Cage?) Michael says he hated it, and Nelle says she saw everyone else transfixed, and wondered what she was missing. He tells her to be honest. She says that her being honest would be a change. He tells her the only way to get better at something is to practice, and suggests she start.
Oscar introduces himself to Josslyn. He says everyone at school knows and likes her, even the new kid. He tells her about the kids discussing her parents, and her dad being some kind of crime boss. She says that’s her stepfather, but hopefully not for much longer. She asks if he’s not into the hot tub thing, and he thinks getting naked with strangers isn’t a good way to meet people. Tell that to any number of reality shows.
Sonny tells Jason that he’s bleeding. Carly asks who shot him. Jason says she did.
Sam tells Monica that she sees Jason slowly getting back into the business. She says that she even heard Sonny saying he has him. Monica says that doesn’t sound like Sonny, and were those his exact words? Sam sees Sonny in the room with them, telling her not to trust anyone.
Carly asks Jason if he needs anything, and he says he could use a drink. Gorgonzola is going to the hospital. He should make a full recovery, and will be extradited afterward. Sonny toasts to Carly, a woman of rare courage and horrible marksmanship. He makes another toast to Jason, who has perfect timing. Jason says that Julian warned him. Sonny wonders about Julian’s angle, and Jason thinks he was trying to impress Sam.
Monica asks if Sam is all right, and Sam says she doesn’t think so. Monica thinks she needs some rest. Sonny talks to her in her mind, and Monica repeats that she needs to rest. Sonny says she needs to cover better. How long before they take the kids and send her away? Sam’s phone rings. It’s Jason. He apologizes for not calling sooner, and says everything is taken care of. He’s flying back tonight. Sam no longer sees Sonny, only an empty chair.
Curtis tells Jordan that they just got together. She says Stella is his second mother, and he says she’ll be fine. Jordan says she’ll never forgive him for choosing her. She tells him that it’s not anyone’s decision but hers. All the damage she’s done, she doesn’t want to do anymore. She’s done, and they’re done.
Stella says TJ is responsible, like his father – his actual father. Thomas brought him up, and taught him right from wrong; he made his mark on TJ, and when she looks at him, she sees Thomas. She asks how he coped with the news. He tells her that at first, he was upset, but nothing has really changed. His mom messed up bad, but she’s still his mom.
Josslyn tells Oscar that her family situation is messed up, and Oscar says his is too. He’s expected to act a certain way and do certain things without question. He says he used to speak up and try to change things, but no one listened. She identifies. They compare notes on their family lives.
Michael tells Nelle that he’ll go first. He tells her a story about how he wore tighty-whities when he was in school, but saw the other guys in the locker room wearing boxers. He didn’t know it was a choice between one or the other, so wore boxers over his briefs. You’d think one of the male figures in his life would have clued him in. Nelle says she’s afraid of dogs because she was bitten by a chihuahua. He tells her that’s barely a dog, and they go back and forth. She’s afraid of screwing something up at Crimson, and he tells her how wonderful she is, but she says he’s supposed to be talking about himself. He says that he has excellent taste in women, and she tells him that he’s the best person she’s ever known; she has faith in him. Michael says he should go, and Nelle says maybe he should, but he doesn’t have to. He says, good, because he doesn’t want to. I’m wondering if this relationship will stick, since his batting average is pretty bad.
Josslyn says that the plus side of not joining the others is that she and Oscar get all the pretzels to themselves. He says he thought she had it all – money and the good life – but she totally gets him. He asks if she drinks, and she says not that much, but her real father is Australian, and they’re big drinkers. She takes a swig from a bottle that I assume contains alcohol. He says she’s full of surprises. She takes another gulp.
Nelle and Michael kiss. He says they should stop, but she says no.
Jordan wants to stop making mistakes, and Curtis asks if she hasn’t learned to get a second opinion. She may have decided they’re done, but he’s decided they’re not. He leaves, and she ponders.
Stella tells TJ that she understands why Curtis kept quiet. He did it for all of them. If TJ can forgive him, maybe she can find a way. TJ says it’s a start. When she asks what he means, he tells her that if she can forgive Curtis, maybe she can forgive Jordan.
Sonny tells Jason to take Carly back to Port Charles, but she says they have unfinished business and she’s staying. Jason promises he’s fine, and tells them he’ll see them back home. Outside, he calls Sam. He says he’ll be home soon, and he loves her.
Back in Sam’s head, Sonny says that Jason sounds happy and energetic, and loves what he’s doing. He says Jason is back in the business, and to get used to it. Sam says that Sonny can’t have him, but Sonny says he has him already. She says she’ll stop him, and he tells her that those are big words from a little woman. Sam says she’ll get the last words. Wait and see.
Carly tells Sonny that was exciting. She knew he wouldn’t let anything happen to her, and he says that he’d die first. They kiss, but when Sonny moves in for seconds, Carly pushes him away.
On Monday, Hayden has a job for Curtis, Kiki asks if Ava wants her to not come back, and Josslyn says OMG.
💍 I gave 90 Day Fiancé another try, this time it was Pedro and Chantal: Our Journey So Far. Whatever that was I saw last week (I’ve mercifully blocked their names from my mind) was an honest-to-God train wreck, but this was a lot better. The episode mostly revolved around Chantal having lied to her parents, saying that Pedro was just there on a student visa. It was more like they met in the Dominican Republic, are engaged, and have to get married or he’s being sent back. Chantal spent a lot of the time wailing about not having the wedding of her dreams. To be honest, I didn’t really think too much about that stuff growing up. I did have a fabulous wedding on the cheap though, but that’s because I have talented friends. We also didn’t have to whip it up in a few weeks’ time. These two didn’t even have rings. Pedro was annoying, pretending he didn’t understand, whenever Chantal’s dad asked him a question. Her brother was the best, just eyeing Pedro up and down, with folded arms. I was a mother’s helper for many years, and it was reminiscent of the stance one of “my” kids took when meeting my husband for the first time. Except she was five, and Chantal’s brother is considerably older. No surprise, the announcement – made a few days before the wedding – didn’t go over too big with the family. Chantal’s parents were understandably concerned, and wanted her to get a prenup to cover any future inheritance. She and Pedro ended up downloading one from the internet, since a lawyer required more than a one-day turnaround, and it seemed to appease them. Pedro alternately blamed Chantal for waiting so long to tell them, and blamed her parents for having an issue with no one knowing him. Chantal’s best friend put together a lovely setting in the park for the ceremony, and her parents and brother showed up at the last minute. Her father did say, however, that they’d be keeping an eye on Pedro. No doubt.
👰 You probably know by now, but The Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Kenya Moore is a married woman. Not to Matt, thank God. She’s now wed to businessman Marc Daly. Although the nuptials were on the sly, many of their nearest and dearest were at their St. Lucia affair. The couple also had a mini honeymoon there. No big surprise, Kenya looked beautiful, as did the setting.
💸 Highly recommended is Wizard of Lies, a film about Bernie Madoff, in rotation on a few of the movie channels. The whole cast is wonderful, but Robert De Niro as Bernie is eerily accurate. It was like a combination of Wall Street type movie and a documentary, two of my favorite genres.
Something to Ponder…
🎪 Pretty soon we won’t be able to say anyone is hogging something in case we offend a pig. There will be no more bogarting a joint either. Humphrey’s great grandniece might feel disrespected. How much longer must this circus continue?
Quotes of the Week
Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud. – Maya Angelou
Action is the foundational key to success. – Pablo Picasso
That’s why I grew my beard. To hide my sadness. – Ryan Serhant, from Million Dollar ListingNew York, after having to table a listing.
What I Watched - TV With Theresa 