(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Nina meets Valentin at the MetroCourt, and tells him that she arranged a playdate between Aiden and Charlotte. Charlotte was amenable, and she’s glad Miss Tait didn’t diminish that part of her. She can’t help thinking about how Maxie and Peter believed Obrecht was blackmailing him. She asks what that’s about.
Maxie and Peter find Obrecht at Charlie’s. Maxie asks why she vanished before the results of the DNA test came in. Wasn’t she curious? Obrecht says she couldn’t bear to witness her niece’s broken heart when she found out Sasha wasn’t her daughter.
Sasha punches the heavy bag at the gym. Michael comes in and asks who’s face she’s imagining. She says, herself.
Laura looks at an article about Ryan’s hand being found. Elizabeth joins her, and Laura asks how Aiden is. Elizabeth gets a text, and says, Nina wants to arrange a playdate for Aiden and Charlotte.
Jordan sees Franco at the hospital. He asks how she is, and she says she’s getting used to her new routine of early morning dialysis. She asks about him, and he says he’s fully recovered. He’s hoping the discovery of Ryan’s severed hand means he’s no longer on the earth. She says the authorities are convinced of it, but it never hurts to be extra cautious. Franco says the upside is, now they can tell the difference between Ryan and Doc. Good point! Doc comes down the hallway, startling them.
Ava walks into her apartment, and sets the alarm. She hears someone in the hallway, and takes out her gun. She says she knows Ryan is out there, and tells him to show himself. It’s Curtis, who says, relax. She asks how long he’s been following her, and he says, not long. She tells him come in and explain himself. She asks, what’s going on? and he says he’s the protection her brother hired. Julian is worried about her. She asks if he’s afraid she’ll hurt herself or hurt Ryan.
Laura wasn’t aware that Charlotte and Aiden were friends, and Elizabeth says Aiden never said anything. Laura hopes it’s progress, and Charlotte is trying to get along with him. Elizabeth has the sneaking suspicion Franco had something to do with it. Laura says he’s invested in the boys. Elizabeth understands he has good intentions, but wishes he’d talk to her first. Is it too much to ask for full disclosure? Laura says, apparently so.
Doc tells Franco and Jordan that he has both hands. Jordan is glad Doc was released, but he says, Noragets the credit. He was just clearing out his office. Franco asks if he’s going to practice elsewhere. Doc doesn’t know. He still has his license, and is waiting to see if he gets reinstated, but if there are patients that want to see him, he’ll rent a space. He continues on, and Jordan says she hopes Franco isn’t planning on leaving town. He asks how he ended up under investigation.
Obrecht tells Maxie not to worry. Nina will forgive her for running around with Peter, and planning to take away her daughter. Maxie says she’s already been forgiven, and Obrecht asks if Nina has finally seen Valentin for the liar he is. Peter says Nina and Valentin are more in love than ever. Obrecht says even after they exposed him? Maxie says, there was nothing to expose. The test proved that Sasha really is Nina’s biological daughter.
Michael has his turn on the heavy bag, and says Sasha can have it back, but she says she already had a great workout. She asks whose face is on it for him, and he says a guy who’s been messing with his sister. Sasha thinks that’s sweet, and he holds the bag for her while she gets in a few more punches.
Valentin tells Nina that Maxie and Peter made an assumption based on erroneous speculation. They couldn’t have known what happened with her and Cassandra. Nina says Valentin wanted to call the police, but she said no because of her record. They should have called. Now Obrecht is holding over her like a sword. Valentin says Obrecht isn’t turning her in. She’s just using it to get what she wanted from him. She’s sick and twisted, and not asking him for a favor if she can blackmail him. He says they have everything they can want; Charlotte, Sasha, and a bright future. He suggests they not look back in the shadows, but toward their wedding with their daughters. Nina says he found the child she thought she’d lost, who’s now in her life, and he has Charlotte. They have everything they want. It’s a dream come true, but dreams aren’t made to last. How can she erase the past when she thinks she’s only seconds away from the next heartache? Valentin says they have a bond that’s unique. The naysayers and critics will never get it. He takes her hands in his, and says, what they have is stronger than anyone knows.
Obrecht says, Sasha is actually Nina’s daughter and her niece? It’s truly miraculous. Maxie is glad for Nina’s sake, but since it’s not about Sasha, what secret is Obrecht holding over Valentin’s head? Obrecht doesn’t have the slightest idea what they’re talking about, but since they’re pestering her, she’s moving to another location. They’re interrupting her flow, but she’s grateful for the uplifting news. Outside, she flashes back to seeing Valentin at Madeline’s casket.
Laura tells Elizabeth, if only Doc had said something, she would have known they’d switched places, and could have avoided the devastating loss. Elizabeth says, it wasn’t malicious. Doc made a terrible mistake, but others have been forgiven for much worse. Laura says she was relieved when Doc’s case was dropped, and Elizabeth says, so was she. It would have been terrible if Doc went to prison for his brother’s crimes. Laura thought so too, but she doesn’t know how go forward. Their marriage is in limbo. Alexis drew up divorce papers but she couldn’t bring herself to sign them. It’s not just about her though. Lulu had a massive panic attack when she saw Doc with Laura at home. It’s part of why she suggested Lulu go away. Elizabeth says, Lulu is strong; she’ll get through it. Laura says, it’s a good placeto heal. She’s never been more confused. Despite his mistakes, she still loves Doc as much as she ever did.
Franco asks Jordan what he did now, but she says, he’s not a suspect; just the opposite. She’s asking because the PCPD wants to acknowledge his help with the investigation. Because of him, they uncovered the truth, and the full extent of Ryan’s crimes. She tells him to be around next month, and he tells her to let him know the date. She says he did a great service, but doesn’t think he was heroic. They both know she dragged him kicking and screaming, and blackmailed him. She says, he got the job done, and they’re grateful.
Franco sees Doc at the elevator, and says, when Doc lands somewhere, let him know. Doc asks if he wants and appointment, and Franco says Doc got him more than any other shrink. Elizabeth reminded him of that. Doc says he left Franco open to Ryan’s lies and manipulation. No other shrink failed him like that. Franco says Doc helped him. He listened, offered insight, and never judged. He’s trying to follow Doc’s example. Doc says he’d welcome the opportunity to work with Franco again. Franco says he’ll think about it.
Ava says, so her brother took it upon himself to hire a bodyguard, and Curtis says, you’re welcome. She says, thank you, but no thank you. Curtis says Julian knew she was on edge, and if Ryan is still alive, she’s his number one target. It’s for her peace of mind. She has no doubt he’s excellent, but she has no intention of being followed around. She has to live her life. He says, or what’s left of it. What’s she doing with a gun? She says, so she can protect herself. He says, it’s smart to take precautions, but reverting back to her bad ways and giving Ryan vigilante justice, not so much.
Nina is worried that Obrecht knows a secret that can ruin them, and will do it again, but Valentin says she knows where her bread is buttered. And she has priorities. She wants to see James, and has to be on good terms with Maxie to do that. She can’t do that, and be blackmailing him. Nina says, it makes sense, but Obrecht rarely makes sense. She’s smart and unpredictable, and wants to tear them apart for no reason. Obrecht walks in, and waves.
Sasha tells Michael, good workout. He helps get the tape off of her hands, and asks if she’s sore. She says, a little. He rubs her hand, and she says, how about him? She rubs his hand, and he says, a little. She gets up, and says the last time they saw each other, she couldn’t get away fast enough. He asks if it was something he said, and she says, yeah. He asks if he did something offensive, and she says, no. He opened up wide about his ex, and she hasn’t been up front. He’s looking for someone in life whose honest like him, not like her. Michael gets up, and walks away.
Maxie tells Peter that Obrecht seemed unexpectedly surprised and relieved to find out Sasha is Nina’s daughter. Peter agrees, and Maxie wonders what she’s holding over Valentin’s head. There’s definitely something suspicious about him too. Peter doesn’t think so. Some things should be kept hidden. Maxie asks if they shouldn’t find out what the truth is, so Valentin doesn’t hurt Nina again.
Elizabeth tells Laura that she wouldn’t be with Franco if it wasn’t for her. She would have lost out on a loyal man who adores her and the boys. She knows at its core, Franco’s heart is in the right place. What it comes to is, who is the man at his core? Laura says she’s right. The fundamental man is what matters most. Elizabeth has to go, but tells Laura that she saw Doc earlier at the hospital. He was cleaning out his office. She thinks moving is going to be tough. Laura thanks her, and makes a worried face. Since Griff is no longer around, Laura definitely makes the best one.
Ava tells Curtis to let Julian know she fired him. She has no need of his services. Curtis says, technically, she didn’t hire him, so she can’t fire him. She says she can make it impossible for him to do his job; call him out, blow his cover, tell the cops he’s stalking her. He doesn’t doubt she can drive him crazy, but he was there when she saw Kiki in a body bag. He’ll never forget it; it broke his heart. He’s sorry for her loss, and would like to help. She says he can help by getting the hell out of there. He goes to the door, turns to look at her, and leaves. Ava takes out her gun, and says, come on, Ryan. Come and get me.
Michael returns to Sasha, who says she thought she’d run him off this time. He says he went to the ice machine, and puts some on her hand. He says she’s not being clear, and she says he values honesty, and there have been times in her life when she’s been less than. Michael tells her not to beat herself up. He just offered to buy her a drink, not get married. She says she wanted to close any doors before they opened to avoid any… whatever. He say hypothetically speaking, if she doesn’t regret the untruth she told, is it possible she might like him, or is that what she’s lying about? Sasha says she’s not lying about liking him. She’d never lie about that.
Maxie says Valentin lobbied for Peter to retract his statement. Why do it without leverage? Peter says he knows Valentin would want to protect Nina. Maxie says, that’s how the DNA test started, and Peter says, and now look how it turned out. They’re just starting to rebuild their relationship. Maxie says, if Sasha hadn’t intervened, she’d still be tiptoeing around Nina. Peter thinks she should stop trying find something. He wouldn’t mind not spending their downtime waiting for the other shoe to drop. Maxie is afraid it will drop on Nina first, but Peter says, she’s a big girl. She knows who she’s remarrying. Let her be happy. Maxie wonders how he can say that, when Valentin caused him so much pain?
Valentin says Nina should suck it up for James’s sake, but she says she’s not there yet. Obrecht says she saw Maxie and Peter. They told her the good news. She’s relieved and happy. Nina says, is she? Does Obrecht really care about her? She walks off, and Obrecht asks if Valentin would care to explain the hostility. She’s sure it’s his doing. He says she’s rightly assuming that, since she was blackmailing him. She says how would she do that without leverage? Sasha passed another DNA test that proved she’s Nina’s daughter. How did he arrange that?
Curtis meets Jordan in that new cellar-like café. Curtis says Ava is on to something. When she said she doesn’t believe Ryan is alive, she doesn’t just believe it, she’s hoping he is. Jordan asks, why? He says a serial killer got her to fall in love with him, and murdered her daughter. What’s she going to do? Wait for him to be brought to justice, or seek it for herself? The only problem is, if Ryan is still alive, how did he survive without a hand? There was mad blood loss, the risk of infection, and he had to be weakened. Jordan says, he had help, but if he did, they’re probably dead already.
Franco arrives at Ava’s apartment, and asks why she needs to see him. She says she needs a boyfriend, and he’s the perfect man. He says they did that. It didn’t work out then, and it won’t now. Besides, he’s married. She says he’ll just be posing. Putting on a show to lure Ryan out. Franco says, the last time, he got stabbed for his trouble. She says it just needs to be convincing enough to make Ryan jealous. Lure him out of hiding, and into a trap. He says a presumably dead serial killer, and she says they can make him pay. Finally and forever. They can do this for Kiki.
Doc thanks Elizabeth for whatever she said to Franco on his behalf. She says his mistake doesn’t negate how he helped Franco. He made Franco whole, and she’ll always be grateful. She hopes things work out for him. He goes to the elevator, and Laura comes out. She heard it was moving day. He says he’s clearing out his office to make room for his replacement. She says no one can replace him. He says, apparently Ryan did. He can’t forget, the hospital sure can’t, and he’s certain she can’t either. She says, no, but she can put it in perspective.
Peter doesn’t want Maxie to have a grudge on his behalf. He doesn’t want revenge on Valentin, and neither should she. Maxie says Anna put him up for adoption, doing what she thought was best, and finding a loving home. Valentin wrecked it by giving him to Faison. Peter says he also instantly regretted it. If not for Valentin, his father would have tangled up his destiny. His father was evil, and now he’s dead. He prefers to leave the past in the past, where it can’t hurt him.
Obrecht asks Valentin, if the DNA test was positive because Sasha is really Nina’s daughter, why was he standing over Madeline’s coffin? Perhaps Nina should hear about it. He says she’s brave, but slow to appreciate the gravity of her situation. As long as he and Nina happy, she’ll be happy. When they’re not happy, all bets are off the table.
Franco tells Ava, it’s a fantastically terrible idea. She says, fantastically brilliant. Ryan is already jealous of him. Imagine if he found out Franco had taken his place in her bed. He says, not happening. She says Ryan murdered her daughter, and she won’t rest until he’s dead. He tells her, find another patsy. God help them – and her.
Jordan tells Curtis that she checked all of the doctors in the area. Curtis says maybe it’s someone other than. She says they checked within a hundred mile radius. He says he got a text that pointed him in the right direction.
Laura says when she found Doc at Ferncliff, even when the situation was deeply terrifying, she was also overcome with a sense of joy, because realized the idea that he’d stopped loving her was a lie. He’s a sweet man, patient with her precious grandchildren, and took a bullet for her. That man is still around. The one who she loved, and still loves. He says he never stopped loving her. She says maybe this is the place they can start over. They kiss.
Maxie thinks it’s great that Peter has made peace with Valentin. She underestimated him. She didn’t know he was so evolved. He says don’t give him too much credit. Valentin is in a prison of his own making. If he’s lying, he’s living in fear that Obrecht will tell Nina. Maxie asks if he thinks it’s worth it to ask Obrecht. He says not on his account. He doesn’t care; that’s the point. There are consequences. He had rage for his father, and he paid the price. She and Nathan did. He can’t go back to that life. He knows true happiness; moving forward with her.
Obrecht says Peter and Maxie worked in Valentin’s favor. Why the powerplay? Unless he’s keeping a secret. He says she should be asking how she can keep Valentin happy. She has far more to lose than he does. He walks out.
Michael puts ice on Sasha’s hands, and asks how she’s feeling. She has a question first. She wants to apologize for running out at the bar; it was rude. He says, accepted. What’s the question? She asks if he thinks they can still be friends. She doesn’t need… whatever, but she could use a friend. Something uncomplicated, a have a hit at the heavy bag friend. He says he’s completely on board. An uncomplicated friendship.
Which they immediately decide to complicate by getting busy. Surprising everyone with an unexpected song part.
Elizabeth asks if Franco knows anything about a playdate between Charlotte and Aiden. Franco says he told her that he went to see a friend. He explained what was going on to Nina. Knowing that Charlotte was a pint-sized influencer, he said he thought if she became friends with Aiden, the other kids would fall in line. He knows he should have run it by her first. She says, maybe he should have, but she’s discovered she loves him for making their life better and, boneheaded husband that he is, she’s glad he’s all hers.
Ava calls Scotty, and asks him to come over. She’d love to see him.
Curtis tells Jordan, if Ryan is alive, he would need things like bandages and painkillers. He put his feelers about to pharmacies up north, and got a hit. Shortly after Ryan disappeared, a pharmacy near Niagara Falls was burglarized. They never caught the perp.
At the hospital, a messenger comes with a package for Doc. Doc asks who it’s from, and he says, it’s from someone named Chamberlain. I’m guessing it’s the hand.
On Monday, Scotty asks what plan Ava is cooking up; Shiloh tells Jason the more Sam trusts him, the closer they become; and Laura freaks out at what’s in the box. Yep. It’s the hand.
🚑 Kiefer Confirm…
The experts validate that Alexis confessed. Again I ask, where’s the leverage?
There has been some internet brouhaha about throwing a piece of cheese on a toddler’s head, to see the reaction when it sticks. Apparently, some people are concerned it will traumatize the kid for life. Highly doubtful. I’m sure there are also PETA members crying out because people are throwing cheese at dogs’ heads. Dogs definitely won’t be traumatized, and will eat the cheese. Maybe these toddlers can learn from the dogs. One time when I spit baby food at my father, he checked to make sure my mother wasn’t looking, and threw a spoonful back. Or so I heard. And none of my problems come from post-traumatic baby food throwing.
A large portion of Mexican Dynasties has focused on Adan’s musical career, and how wonderful his family thinks he is. There seems to be only one person (Doris… I think) being sensibly minded, and saying they’re not being objective. He’s just not that good. It’s not that he might not become that good, but he’s not going anywhere right now. He’s a mix of a second rate Back Street Boy, and a poor man’s Ricky Nelson. He needs both training and to come into this century.
I watched If There Be Thorns last weekend, and Heather Graham hasn’t changed since she was Roller Girl in Boogie Nights. Is it a great plastic surgeon? Amazing genes? A deal with a witch? What?
I saw two email subject lines this week that were of concern. One was – Gucci for Kids. I don’t even own anything from Gucci. Okay, maybe a pair of sunglasses, but I wasn’t seven when I got them. And the other – Prom Anxiety Text Line. I’m sorry, but can kids deal with nothing among their circle of IRL friends anymore? Have they become so socially inept, they need to consult a phone hotline because they got a zit on prom day or their hair is flat? What happened to Glamour magazine?
📺 The Haves and The Have Nots will return on Tuesday, May 7th. It doesn’t look too promising for Derrick with the lion tattoo. I almost threw up at that reveal.
📟 Quotes of the Week
Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground. – Theodore Roosevelt
Love does not dominate; it cultivates. – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Don’t underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering. – Winnie the Pooh
Prepare children for the real world, not the one you wish them to have. – Dr. Phil
Life beats down and crushes the soul and art reminds you that you have one. – Stella Adler
That doesn’t just go away. – Jax Taylor, when asked if he’s still into sucking toes
They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself. – Andy Warhol – or maybe time just passes as things change.
🎆 The New Weekend’s Here!
I don’t know if it’s glory I’m on the edge of, but catching up on sleep, definitely.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Anna comes home, and Finn asks if she had any luck. She tells him most of the reports were redacted, or there wasn’t much information in them. She couldn’t find the proof she needs to find out if she’s Robin’s mom.
Carly finds Josslyn in her office. Josslyn says she needed quiet, and asks if it was okay. Carly says, ofcourse (🍷), and asks what she’s working on. Josslyn says, lyrics. She’s writing a song with Oscar. Carly asks how it’s going, and she says, it’s getting there. She’s trying to finish it in time for them to perform it at the Nurses’ Ball.
At the Quartermaine mansion, Ned sees Olivia crying, and asks if she’s all right. She says, far from it. She just came from Oscar’s room, and it looks more like an intensive care unit than a teenage boy’s room. It reminded her that he’s not coming to stay, but to die. Ned says he’ll be surrounded by family and people who love him. All they can do is make sure he’s comfortable. Olivia says hospitality is her specialty, and as long as Oscar and Kim are under their roof, they’ll be treated like royalty. She sees one of the housekeepers bringing in a wheelchair, but she doesn’t want Oscar to be greeted with it. Oscar walks in, and says, too late. He guesses he’s home.
On the phone, Julian leaves a message for Kim that he’s stuck at work. Kristina still hasn’t shown up. But he’s been thinking about her, and tells her to call if she can.
Neil asks Alexis how Kristina is. Alexis says, she finally tired herself out. He asks if she wants to talk, but Alexis says they’ll talk tomorrow. Neil says if she has an issue with him, they should address it now. They need to present a united front to Kristina tomorrow. Alexis says she practically ambushed Neil because she was so worried. Meanwhile, he was working with Kristina’s father behind her back. Is there a particular reason he didn’t tell her?
Jason asks Michael if Shiloh will make the secret public. Michael says he’s never done it before, but the threat is there. Sonny says Shiloh might have leverage over Kristina.
Shiloh says Sam is a PI, and the only one with the skills to find Kristina. She says so far, all they have is speculation. There are variables that have to be ruled out. She tells him that she’ll be in touch, but he says she didn’t think he was letting her do this alone, did she?
Anna says, maybe Robert is right. He thinks she’s punishing herself. Finn asks what she thinks. She says she made some terrible choices when she was younger, and regrets them as she should, but Robin was always her consolation. Little by little, she got her life together. She wouldn’t love Robin any less, but it would change the narrative of Robin’s life. What will it mean to her, having been raised by her aunt, and not her mother? Finn asks if there’s any of this Robin needs to know.
Olivia hugs Oscar, and Kim thanks them. Olivia tells Oscar to say the word when he gets his appetite back. Monica has given her full access to the kitchen. Drew says, believe it or not, that’s a big deal. Ned tells them their rooms are ready. Olivia says they’re on the first floor next to each other, with a beautiful view of the grounds and the lake. Kim and Drew leave to get their bags from the car. Oscar says, now that they’re gone, he needs to speak to Ned and Olivia in private.
Neil tells Alexis respect for boundaries is imperative. He sets the same parameters for all of his patients. Alexis asks if he treats other mothers along with their daughters, and if there’s a discount to offset the betrayal. He says he didn’t know Sonny until after she’d shared her concerns. Sonny summoned him to his office, and he was polite, but clear he was making an offer Neil couldn’t refuse. When he realized Kristina was also her daughter, it reinforced his decision to take her on. Alexis asks what they do now. Is it a conflict of interest? He says it would be unethical for him to talk about one patient’s sessions with another. Alexis says during their impromptu session at The Floating Rib, he shared some advice in a general way, but didn’t tell her that he had personal experience with cults.
Shiloh tells Sam that they’ll find Kristina together. She understands he wants to help, but she works best alone. He says that was before she was one of them. Now she doesn’t have to do anything by herself ever again.
Michael tells Sonny they have no way of knowing what information Kristina gave to Shiloh. It could have been about herself. Sonny says he would want something bigger. The worse the secret, the better the leverage and payoff. Michael says something about Kristina might be embarrassing, but not bring in money. Jason says, Kristina doesn’t know about the business, but Michael says, all the kids know what Sonny does. Jason says all Kristina knows are Sonny’s allegedly illegal acts; she has no facts or proof. Sonny needs time to process everything, and decide what to do. He thanks Michael. Michael says he has to meet Josslyn. He promised her a ride to see Oscar. He and Kim are moving into the Quartermaine’s today. He leaves, and Sonny tells Jason, the truth is, they don’t know what Shiloh has on him or what Kristina gave Shiloh as a pledge.
Anna tells Finn, if Robin is Alex’s daughter, she needs to know. If she had proof, it would be easy. The discussion would be incredibly painful, but straightforward. She couldn’t keep that secret. It would be in violation of what they mean to each other, their history, and all they’ve shared. All she has is a paranoid theory. Finn says, that’s not entirely true. There are intensive paternity tests that can determine who’s the mother between identical twins. Anna asks if it’s feasible. He says, it’s tricky and complicated, and they need the DNA from all parties. She says, Robert would never agree. Even if she got a sample without his knowledge, she’d still have to get Alex and tell Robin. If Robert found out, he’d lose his mind, and it would tear apart the family for no reason. Finn’s phone rings. He has an emergency at the hospital. Anna says she’s all right. She needs to think about all this. She tells him to go, and that she loves him. He says he loves her too.
Sonny tells Jason, the worst case is Kristina got into his business records. Jason says between Brick and Spinelli, all the records are encrypted. She’s never even got close enough to overhear anything. Sonny says, it’s a long shot, but they have to be prepared. Jason says they have two options. One is, ask Kristina. Sonny says they haven’t even started reprogramming her yet. Jason says, then they need to find out where Shiloh keeps the pledges, and destroy them. Sonny says, they need Sam.
Sam and Shiloh go to Charlie’s. Sam tells Julian that they’re trying to find Kristina; has he seen her? He says he can tell them where she’s supposed to be – tending bar – but she was a no show. If they find her, tell her she’s about to lose her job.
Carly thinks it’s great that Josslyn and Oscar are writing a song together. She’d love to hear it if Josslyn wants to share. Josslyn asks if she thinks it’s going to be that bad. Carly says she’s sure it’s not a hot mess, but understands if Josslyn wants to wait until it’s finished. Josslyn hopes they get a chance to perform it. She thinks the more Oscar has to look forward to, the better. Carly agrees. Giving Oscar a goal, and something to anticipate is good. She sees how hard Josslyn is working to stay positive. Michael comes in, and says he thought they were meeting in the lobby. Josslyn says, sorry; she lost track of time. Carly asks if this is bring your kids to work day, and would they like dinner? Michael says, they would, but Oscar is moving in today. Josslyn goes to get her stuff, and Carly says, it must be tough for her. Michael promises to look out for her, and Carly says he’s the best.
Oscar says he needs a favor from Olivia and Ned. Olivia says, anything, and he says he needs them to plan his funeral.
Anna looks through a photo album, and says she couldn’t stand if she wasn’t Robin’s mother. Maybe Robert is right, and she’s being ridiculous, but what if it’s true? She looks closer at one of the photos, and asks if it could be that simple. She gets up.
Drew asks if Kim is okay. He knows it’s difficult. Up until now, it was just her and Oscar, and now, all this family. She knows they’re just trying to help. He says if they seem demanding, or she doesn’t feel right, he’ll back up her decision. She says she’s not going to lie. It feels overwhelming, but it’s Oscar’s choice. Demanding or not, if being here helps him in any way, she’s all in.
Oscar tells Ned and Olivia, first, he doesn’t want a funeral, but a memorial. Nothing solemn or sad. He’s hoping he can trust them to see it through. Ned says they shouldn’t get ahead of themselves, but Oscar says he knows that’s not true. He wouldn’t be there otherwise. He gives Ned a paper. Olivia says there’s nothing they wouldn’t do for Oscar, but doesn’t he think his parents should be involved? Oscar says, no. They’ll be devastated, and he doesn’t want to burden them, his grandmother, or Josslyn any more than they already are. They’re going through enough. He tells Olivia, no tears. Promise him? Ned says, she cries at weddings, baptisms, birthdays… Olivia says, and Hallmark commercials. Oscar says, they’re brutal. She can’t promise no tears, but other than that, she can follow his instructions to the letter. Ned says, it’s doable. They’ll take care of it. He promises. Josslyn comes in, and asks if she’s interrupting something. Oscar says, no. They were just talking about the future.
Drew thanks Michael. Michael is glad they’re moving in. It means a lot to his grandmother. Family supports family, and Oscar is one of them.
Alexis asks Neil if he has a friend in a cult. He says, no, but he’s observed his share of their deceit and lies. She says she’s simply asking what his insight is regarding his personal experience. He says he’s not a friend; he’s her doctor. She says, got it. So is he going to help her daughter? She’s a wreck. He says he’s adding his professional insight to the process, but he’s not sharing. She needs to respect his ethnical boundaries – if she wants to see him. Hmm… Was that some kind of flirting? They did almost go out when they first met.
Julian tells Sam that Kristina is probably on an impromptu spring break, and on a plane to Florida as they speak. Sam says, that sounds like her. Shiloh asks Julian to get in touch if he hears from Kristina. Julian says, and he is…? Shiloh introduces himself. That made me laugh. Shiloh probably assumes everyone knows who he is, and maybe Julian does, but put him in his place.
Jason tells Sonny that’s why Sam has been taking classes. She’s trying to get Shiloh to trust her, so she can come up with evidence, but so far she’s come up empty. Sonny says now she has something specific to look for; the pledge. Jason says he can get into the house and look, but Sonny says what if he gets caught? Margaux dropped the charges because Shiloh told her too, but if Shiloh wants to press charges, she’ll do it. Sam is in a better position. Jason says the more time she spends with DOD and Shiloh, the bigger the chance things can go wrong, and she’ll get caught.
Jason tells Carly that he saw Michael. He said Oscar was moving into the Quartermaine’s. Carly says he just left with Josslyn. Jason asks how Josslyn is doing, and Carly says, she’s doing everything she can to support Oscar. They’re writing some lyrics, and she wants to perform with him at the Nurses’ Ball. She’s not in denial, but she’s trying to stay positive. He asks how Carly feels, and she says, it’s tough, seeing your kid in pain. It’s a parent’s worst nightmare. She wants to stay present, and be supportive, but wishes she could shield Josslyn from what’s coming. Jason says, sometimes you just can’t.
Josslyn wants Oscar’s input on the lyrics. They need to get this down before the Nurses’ Ball. Oscar looks the lyrics over. He thinks she should perform with someone else. She says, no; it’s their song. He knows, and they can finish writing it together, but she should find someone to rehearse and sing it with her. She says she’s not performing with anyone else. He says they both know he might not make it to that night. He doesn’t want let her down. Josslyn suggests they not to get ahead of themselves. They’re here right now. She thinks a chord needs tweaking. He smiles, but it’s a kind of sad smile.
Alexis goes to Charlie’s. Sam asks her if she remembers Shiloh. They’re concerned about Kristina. She hasn’t been at DOD since last night. Alexis says she just spoke to her. She wanted to give Julian a message. Sam asks, what’s going on? but Alexis says she knows her sister. She didn’t give any details. She left because she got cold feet about a big position of some kind. Shiloh asks if she said where she was going. Alexis says, no, but she’s safe. She thinks Kristina needs time to clear her head. Sam says they should get going, and Shiloh asks Alexis to have Kristina call him if she speaks to her.
Outside, Shiloh wonders where Kristina went. Sam says, with Kristina, you never know. Shiloh says he’s going back to meditate on this. (<snort>) He asks if Sam wants to join him, like it’s a hot tub, but she says she can’t. She has to pick up the kids. Like dogs, kids can be a great excuse if necessary. He thanks her, and says he trusts her commitment is deeper than her sister’s. She says, no question. He leaves, and she looks worried.
Sonny asks Neil what they’re getting into. Is it like an intervention? Neil says, sort of. He’ll serve as moderator, so Kristina feels like she’s being heard. He asks if Sonny has read the book. Sonny says he has, but doesn’t connect with it. He doesn’t see how it could convince Kristina to give up her family. Neil says, Shiloh’s prose is deliberately opaque, so the reader can project their own problems and inadequacies into it. Shiloh acts superior, and supplies answers, positive reinforcement, and wisdom. He becomes synonymous with enlightenment. Sonny asks if Neil understands this garbage, and Neil says, it’snot garbage to Kristina, and Sonny has to understand it importance to her if they’re going to get her back. Sonny says they have another problem. Kristina might have given Shiloh leverage for blackmail.
Michael asks Kim if she’s happy with the guest room. Kim says it’s more than twice the size of her apartment. Michael says, it takes a while to get used to. It’s a great house. The people who live in it are crazy, but well intentioned. When the chips are down, they have each other’s backs. Hers too. I tried to find out how many rooms were supposed to be in the Quartermaine mansion, but came up empty.
Josslyn thinks the lyrics still need work. Oscar suggests, life is short, and the list is long. Better? She says, much. They have the first verse and the chorus down. It’s coming together well. Oscar says they make a good team, and she says, they do. He asks if she wants to hear how it sounds, and picks up the guitar.
Carly tells Jason that her heart breaks for Drew and Kim. She knows the pain that’s coming. There’s nothing worse than losing a child. Josslyn is too young to lose the boy she loves, and she has to watch him die. Jason says she has to support and love Josslyn, and somehow get through it. Carly tells him, Josslyn said it’s worth pain of losing Oscar because she loves him so much; and she meant it. Carly has to find a way to honor that. Jason says she will. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Sam. She asks if Jason has a second. It’s about Kristina. Carly tells him, go.
Jason asks how it went with Shiloh. Sam says he insisted on tagging along when she searched for Kristina. Luckily, they ran into her mother, who said she’s spoken to Kristina, and that she needs time to figure things out. Jason asks if Shiloh bought it, and Sam says, thank God. He was convinced Jason kidnapped Kristina.
Julian tells Alexis, sorry, but he’s had it with her daughter. He asks if Kristina wants to quit, but Alexis says she doesn’t. Think of it was a leave of absence. Julian says, a sabbatical from bartending? Alexis says she needs the job. It’s the one stable thing in her life. He asks how this is his problem. He can’t make any promises. He’s stuck his neck out enough for her. He fronted her salary when she needed a substantial loan. Something to do with her group.
Sonny tells Neil, Kristina shared damaging information with Shiloh. Some kind of tribute or pledge before she could join the Trust. Neil says it’s par for the course to manipulate cult members that way, so they can’t leave. Sometimes it’s financial, sometimes personal, sometimes both. They’d sacrifice anything for the approval of their leader. Sonny says they need to know what they’re dealing with. What kind of leverage Shiloh has. He wants to ask Kristina, but Neil says, absolutely not.
Anna opens a box with memories in it. She pulls various items out, and tosses them aside. She finds a metal box full of jewelry. She takes out a bracelet, and cries. Finn comes in, and she tells him, it’s allright. She found it. He asks, what? and she says, proof that she’s Robin’s mom.
Carly picks up a crumpled paper that missed the wastebasket.
Oscar plays and sings. Josslyn suggests a lower pitch. He he leans back, and she asks if he’s all right. He says he got tired, and Josslyn says, it’s okay. They can pick it up again tomorrow. Oscar says, no. He wants to keep going, and plays some more. Josslyn watches him. Kim listens on the stairs. Drew comes in, and says, he’s pretty good. Kim cries, and he holds her.
Julian tells Alexis that he didn’t realize Kristina was flying off to God-knows-where when he gave her $10K. Alexis asks what he was thinking, and he says what he does for his employees is his business. She says it’s her business when the employee is her child. She asks if what he did for Kristina was actually for her, and he says, no good deed... Alexis writes a check, and he asks what she’s doing. She says, damagecontrol. She asks him not to cash it right away; she needs to move some money around. She wants him to promise to give Kristina her job back, and he says, okay. He hopes Kristina is okay, and Alexis says, she will be.
Jason tells Sam, before Kristina joined the Trust, she had to give a pledge. Something Shiloh could hold over her head; something incriminating about her or someone she loves. Sam says, Sonny, and Jason says, it makes sense. Kristina doesn’t have any secrets that would be worth money. Sam has access to the house. Does she think she can find Kristina’s pledge? She says she has to, or Kristina will never be free.
Shiloh goes back to his office or mediation room or whatever. He opens a file drawer, and takes out Kristina’s file. For as long as it took, the pledge is pretty short. The most I can read is, Kiefer’s death was no accident. (See below for info on who Kiefer was, and why this makes no sense.)
Neil tells Sonny, Kristina is nowhere near ready talk about the pledge. He’s seen how fragile Kristina is. If she told a secret about herself, she’ll be deeply ashamed, but if she thinks she betrayed Sonny, it will shatter her. When glass shatters, it’s like a bomb; pieces everywhere. A broken glass can be repaired, but a shattered glass is destroyed forever.
Tomorrow, Franco asks if he’s under investigation, Maxie asks Obrecht what the secret is that she’s holding over Valentin’s head, and Ava asks someone how long they’ve been following her.
❓ About That Kiefer…
You know everyone had to be googling Kiefer’s death. I did too, and I can’t figure it out. The short version is, Kiefer was Kristina’s boyfriend; he beat her; Alexis ran him over; Sam and Molly found him, and brought him to GH; he died; and Alexis eventually confessed. Unless they’re changing this narrative, I don’t know how this is leverage. Everything was public knowledge. It would be really funny though, if Shiloh is just stupid, and the joke is on him.
👘 On Project Runway, the challenge was to create a female video game protagonist, but the contestants were cautioned not to make it into a superhero costume. They were to be functional, yet fashionable, which seems to be part of the criteria nearly every week. Hester was the winner, with an all-black pants number that had neon and see-through accents, including a cute vinyl backpack. Rakan was out, with a bit of a silver/cranberry polyvinyl mess that was too constricting. He was a good sport, saying it was a pleasure and a great platform, and he was proud of himself. Venny – who was disappointed in his own effort, thinking it looked like something from a church choir, although I thought it was more like from a cheerleading squad – gave the best quote: It was a great concept in my head. Yep, I know exactly how that feels.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
The doorbell rings at Anna and Finn’s place. Finn opens the door to find Chase with non-alcoholic champagne. Chase asks how it went, and says, here’s to the future Doctor and Mrs. Hamilton. Finn closes the door, leaving Chase outside. Chase says, Finn?
Elizabeth gets a text from Franco. She calls him and gets voicemail. She says she knows he’s upset, but they need to work through this as a family. Where is he?
Getting out of the elevator at Nina’s office. He walks in, and asks if she remembers how great it was to be self-centered all the time. Weren’t those the days? She asks what brings him by, and he says they need to talk about their step-kids.
Michael is glad Willow broke away. She did everything to protect her baby and lost it. Willow says he has it wrong, and it’s her fault. She’s been lying to him. Her baby didn’t die. He says they met in grief counseling, and she says she was grieving, just not the same way. She wasn’t there because her baby died. She was there because she gave him up for adoption.
Sonny looks through Shiloh’s book at the MetroCourt. Margaux comes in, and says he’s drinking coffee there like a law abiding citizen. He says it’s his coffee, and his wife’s restaurant. He thought they had an understanding, and Margaux agrees, but says it won’t stop her from prosecuting him. She tells him not to think he won’t slip up. He asks if she thinks he has something to hide, and she says, we all have something.
Brad sure does. He looks up classes on the DOD website, and registers for a seminar. Jason walks up, and says he has a question about the cup. Brad says, there were no traces of anything toxic. Jason says, only tea and Valerian root. Brad says some people call it nature’s Valium because it reduces anxiety. Jason sees the computer screen, and asks if Brad is a member of DOD.
Shiloh comes back to the DOD house, and Sam asks if he found Kristina. He says he checked GH and Mercy, but she’s not there. He thinks he knows what happened. He thinks she was kidnapped by Jason. Sam laughs, and he asks if she doesn’t think he’s capable of it. She says, of course (🍷), but she doesn’t think that’s what happened. She thinks Kristina got cold feet, and is embarrassed to come back. Shiloh says he has proof. She says, how? and he says he has evidence that suggests Jason broke in and grabbed her while they were at The Floating Rib.
Nina asks if Franco and Elizabeth didn’t get married. He says, it was a jailhouse wedding, and she says, romance is different for everyone. She wonders why he wants to talk about their kids, and he says, their step-kids, Charlotte and Aiden. The situation has gotten worse, and the awfulness is more widespread. Nina says, that’s not Charlotte’s fault, but he says, it became her fault when she decided to bully Aiden.
Finn opens the door again, and says Chase is still there. Chase says he’s a detective, and understands the subtleties of human behavior. The door slam was a cry for help. Finn tells him to keep a cork in it; the celebration is on ice. Chase asks if Anna turned him down, but Finn says he didn’t get the chance to ask her. The timing wasn’t right. Chase asks, what’s wrong? Finn doesn’t answer, and Chase says if they’re brothers, they need to be brothers. Finn is supposed to tell him stuff. Finn says he was going to be the guy who gets down on one knee in a crowded restaurant and makes a fool of himself, but Anna’s attention was divided. Chase asks, what by? and Finn says, her strange son. She was focused on him, then her ex showed up. Chase says, again? Finn tells him, Robert’s not the problem, and he might help Anna find the truth. Chase says, about? and Finn says, something in her past. Chase can’t imagine how complicated her past must be. Finn asks, how you can convince someone the past doesn’t matter and doesn’t define them? but Chase says he’s talking to the wrong man.
Willow says she let Michael think they’d both lost a child. Michael says they did both lose a child. She says she shouldn’t have been there. Michael says, maybe it’s selfish on his part, but he’s glad she chose to go to the group. If she hadn’t, they might not know each other. She says he doesn’t regret it by now? but he says, no; not now or ever. He’s glad her child is alive. He can’t imagine knowing her child is out there or how he is or where he is. She says, that’s just it; he’s still here in Port Charles. He asks if she knows the adoptive family. Do they let her see him? She says, in some ways, it’s a relief to be open about it. Other than Chase, Michael is the only person she can talk to. Her son is being raised by people who love him, which brings a measure of peace. Michael says, but she regrets having to give him up. She says she wouldn’t had it been an open adoption, but she gave up all parental rights to make sure… Michael finishes, that Shiloh never found out. She says, now that Shiloh has found her… He says, she needs to make sure he never knows she had his son.
Sonny tells Margaux, while she’s waiting for him to make a fatal mistake, try correcting her own – accepting that Ryan Chamberlain is dead. She says he went over the Falls lost and lost his hand. Sonny says, and last time, he burned death. He suggests she reopen the case. She says it’s out of her jurisdiction. Sonny asks if she’s looked his victims in the eye, and told them it’s not her problem. They deserve justice. She asks if he’s seriously talking to her about justice, and says, revenge is sweet, but it’s gone in a moment, and leaves you hungry, hard, and bitter. He asks if she’s out for revenge. She says she has been at times, but passion gives her a purpose. Sonny sees her glance at the book.
Brad tells Jason that he’s taken a seminar or two to destress from parenting. Jason asks how that’s working out, and Brad says he’s not twitching anymore, so there must be something to it. Lucas joins them, and tells Brad that they’ll have to play it by ear with DOD tonight. He thought he’d be free, but might have to fill in. Brad starts to leave, but Jason holds out his hand, and says, the cup. Brad hands it over, and leaves. Lucas asks if there’s a problem, and Jason says Brad was just doing him a favor. He asks if Lucas is really into DOD. Lucas says it’s way too new age for him, but Brad has taken some classes, and read the book twice. It seems to help him. Maybe Jason should look into it. Jason says maybe he will.
Sam tells Shiloh, it’s her fault. If she hadn’t been such a mess last night, he’d have been there. He says, the only one responsible for Jason’s actions is Jason. Ever since Sam joined, Jason has been consumed with hate for him and everything he stands for. Sam says it’s convinced her this is where she’s supposed to be. He’s glad for that, but it doesn’t help them find Kristina.
Elizabeth passes Lucas in the hall, and he asks if she’s okay. She says, fine; she just has a lot on her mind. Lucas asks if she wants to talk. She insists she’s fine, but he’s not buying it. How is she really? Elizabeth says she’s not great, and he asks how parenting is going. She says she’s making a mess of it. He jokes he’s been at it a whole nine months, so he’s an expert. He asks how Aiden is doing.
Nina tells Franco that her beautiful, brilliant stepdaughter, who speaks impeccable French, can tell a Manet from a Monet, and watch four hours of Figaro, is not a bully. He says, she made a kid who already feels small, feel tiny. Call it what she wants. She knows Charlotte said unkind things, but she was reprimanded by the school, her teachers, and her parents, including her. She apologized for being unkind, and the behavior has stopped. He says, except it hasn’t.
Sonny tells Margaux that he has a simple philosophy. He takes care of his own even when the authorities drop the ball. She says when you take action outside the law, you’re not a protector, but a criminal. Jason comes out of the elevator, and asks if there’s a problem. Margaux says they were just having a discussion. She tells Jason, when he attacked Shiloh, he acted like a man whose attorney would get him off. Jason says Diane is excellent, but Margaux says it wasn’t Diane who got him off; it was Shiloh. She hopes he learned from Shiloh’s act of kindness, but somehow doubts it.
Shiloh tells Sam that he forgave Jason, but Jason is a dangerous man. Sam asks if he has proof. They can call the cops. Shiloh says it won’t stand up in court, but luckily they have the one thing Jason has ever cared about – her.
Finn thought Willow was dealing with her ex, and Chase says, things between them have never been better. They went skating, he fell a lot, and they had a good laugh. The problem with her ex is like with Anna’s past; he won’t go away. Her ex has a hold on her. Finn asks if she’s having trouble getting over him, but Chase says, it’s the other way around. Her ex isn’t letting go.
Willow tells Michael that Shiloh can’t find out about the baby, but his sister needs help. She’ll be happy to talk to Kristina about her experiences in DOD. Michael says Willow warned him about the Trust, and they were able to get her out before they finished. Willow says, before it even happens, Shiloh gets leverage in place. Michael asks, what kind? and she says he convinces the member to make an offer he calls a pledge. Michael says he’s heard the term, but what does it mean? She says, what it means is that the member willingly gives Shiloh a sword to hold over their head forever.
Margaux tells Jason that she’d love to give him some friendly advice. He was lucky last time. If he targets Shiloh again, his luck will run out. Sonny says they’re too busy running a business to pay attention to self-help gurus. She hopes so. She sits at one of the tables.
Jason asks Sonny if he thinks Margaux knows about kidnapping Kristina. Sonny says it’s possible Shiloh told her something. Jason asks if he’s reading Shiloh’s book again, and Sonny says Neil told them it’s important to understand where Kristina is coming from for the exit therapy. Jason asks how that’s going, and Sonny says he discovered something interesting. Before Jason got there, Margaux said something; revenge is sweet, but gone in a moment and leaves you hungry. He taps the book, and says, she was quoting Shiloh. Margaux is a true believer, which makes her dangerous. He and Margaux look at each other.
Sam tells Shiloh she doesn’t understand. How can she prove Jason kidnapped her sister? He says it’s not about proving something or accusing. It’s about the people who claim to love Kristina. Who does she think sent Jason? She asks if he thinks Jason is taking orders from someone. Shiloh asks if Jason has ever done anything Sonny didn’t know about or approve.
Elizabeth tells Lucas that Aiden was the only one out of his entire class not invited to the party. It hurts to be excluded. He says, especially at that age. She adds that Bianca was Aiden’s best friend. She wanted him there, but her parents excluded him. He says, for the same reason Elizabeth wanted Aiden to know two guys skating together was okay. She says it spread to the other kids, and one of them called Aiden a fairy boy. Cameron got in a fight with the kid, and got suspended. Lucas says, good for him, standing up for his brother. Elizabeth says, yeah, except he was angry because they were calling Aiden gay when it wasn’t true, and asked if Aiden could be less gay.Franco freaked out, and said Cameron didn’t want to take the flack because his brother was different. She wasn’t easy on him either, but when she thought about it, Cameron is just a kid. Even though he was wrong, he was just saying it to protect Aiden from bullying. He wasn’t malicious, and she gave him zero credit.
Franco tells Nina, what Charlotte did was awful, but it’s spiraled out of control. The kids are making fun of Aiden for being different. Nina says, he’s just awkward, but Franco says, they’re calling him fairy boy. Nina asks if the school isn’t doing anything. Aren’t the kids supposed to be woke? He says it trickles down from the parents. It can and does still happen. Nina says the school year is almost over. Can’t he ride it out? Franco asks if she’s kidding him. She wants Aiden to ride it out? She says she’s sorry; that’s not what she meant to say. It was stupid. She’s stupid. Franco says she’s not stupid. Now that they agree, will she help out? Nina asks what he wants her to do, and he says, get Charlotte to be Aiden’s friend.
Willow tells Michael, before they join the Trust, you give proof of your loyalty. Michael says, notfinancial, and Willow says, it’s a different kind of gift. You give Shiloh a secret.Something, that should it come to light, would destroy you or someone you love. The candidate writes or records it, and Shiloh transcribes it. This means Kristina has already given the pledge. Shiloh can make your secrets public. Michael asks, did she? and she says, to her eternal regret. He asks why Shiloh hasn’t used it, and she thinks he still believes he can make her go back. When knows for sure… Michael says Shiloh is guilty of fraud and extortion. Willow hopes he can be arrested. Michael says, in the meantime, she can’t risk antagonizing him. He tells her, stay out of it, but she says she can still talk to his sister. Michael tells her, hypothetically, if they took Kristina, and holding her somewhere, it might be considered kidnapping. There’s no way he’s letting her get involved in that.
Jason tells Sonny that he had the cup tested. According to Brad, it was just tea and Valerian root. Sonny says they know she was drugged. Why would Brad lie? Jason says, Brad is a new convert. Sonny says, son of a bitch. Jason guesses Shiloh knows something’s up with them and Kristina. He thinks Brad got rid of the evidence, but he has it, and there’s still residue. Sonny says he needs someone he can trust. He’s calling Brick.
Sam tells Shiloh, there’s nothing Sonny could ask that Jason wouldn’t do. Shiloh says if Sonny asked him to take Kristina and hold her somewhere, would she know where that would be? Sam says Jason knows she’s there. He’s secretive and suspicious, and that means Sonny is too. If they know anything, they’re not telling her. Shiloh says, that means Kristina could be anywhere. Sam is afraid so. Shiloh says, that’snot a problem. Not for her.
Chase tells Finn, the hell with waiting. Let’s crack this baby open. Things are going well with him and Willow, but he won’t propose as long as this thing from the past is hanging over her. Finn says, instead of celebrating, they’re comparing relationships. Chase suggests they toast to something else. The two of them. They’ve gone from strangers to being brothers. Chase says, to brotherhood, and they clink glasses, Chase says since they worked out, maybe there’s hope for Finn and their dad.
Lucas tells Elizabeth, it sounds like they’re doing everything right. She says the boys are so unhappy. He says Franco is an artist, so he knows how to deal with Aiden. He knows he’s not alone if they make it their mission to let him know that it’s not just okay, but preferable to be different. She says, what about Cameron, and Lucas says he can’t be beating up every bigot. It doesn’t help. The best way to change minds is to teach with compassion. Make it look cool. She says he helped, and he says she can make it up to him by having them over for dinner. She says he’s on.
Nina tells Franco, there’s nothing she would like more than Charlotte being Aiden’s friend, but she can’t choose Charlotte’s friends. She has to be on board. Franco says Charlotte is a trendsetter. Doesn’t she if Charlotte shows the kids that they’re friends, the rest will come around? Nina says, they probably will. She’ll definitely try to do this. He thanks her, and she says all they can do is try. He leaves.
Willow appreciates Michael not wanting to involve her in what’s essentially a kidnapping. He says he hasn’t confirmed that’s what it was, so she’s still in the clear. Even though he’s not saying that’s what it is, it would be Kristina’s third time. She was kidnapped by a gangster, Joe Skully, when they were kids, and Michael’s biological father kidnapped him, Morgan, and Kristina. Willow says, so kidnapping is normal in his family? He says, except this alleged abduction is for her own good. She says, whoever loves Kristina the most, has the most to lose. It could be any one of them. Shiloh has a bomb, and she has to find a way do this. She’s been passive too long. Michael says she was just protecting her child, and she says, meanwhile, Shiloh claims another victim. It has to stop. Anything she can do to help, she wants to do it.
Sam tells Shiloh that he doesn’t understand. When Jason and Sonny hide someone, they stay hidden. Shiloh says she has a unique skill set that no one else there has. She can make Jason reveal things that he never would to anyone else. She asks if Shiloh wants her to work a con so he can figure out where Jason hid Kristina.
Franco sees Elizabeth at the hospital. He asks where Cameron is, and she says, community service. He tells her that he reached out to a friend, a fellow parent who can help. She says she did the same. Maybe with their friends’ help, they can make it better for the boys, She takes Franco’s hand, and presses the elevator button.
Nina calls Charlotte. She knows Charlotte is super busy, but asks if Charlotte can clear her schedule for her. She’d like to set up a playdate for her and a friend.
Brad asks Lucas is he still has to cover. Lucas says he’s free, but if it’s all the same, he was wondering if they could skip DOD. Brad says, but he’s free, and Lucas says he was thinking maybe they could have a nice evening with their son, and see what they can learn from that. Brad says, all right. Lucas talked him into it.
Shiloh tells Sam that he’d never ask her to use the methods she’s employed in the past. He’s not judging. What happened with his father is in the past. She’s finding rediscovery and reinvention. It’s all about this woman here now. It’s all about the truth, and he’s just asking her to be his truth seeker. It’s the only way to save Kristina from the people who want to cause her heartache, and bring her back to those who love her for who she is and can be. If anyone can find her, it’s Sam. Help bring her back to them.
Finn tells Chase that he’s glad they’re like this, but it’s a different relationship with their dad. He hopes Chase respects that. Chase gets it, but he can’t blame a guy for trying. Finn says, if Willow is hell bent on a lost cause, shouldn’t Chase practice, so he doesn’t embarrass himself again at the roller rink? Chase thinks she digs guys with a shaky sense of balance. He’s golden. Finn asks what he’s doing there. Chase says he can take a hint, and tells Finn, save some bubbles for Anna. About her past, keep it there; he’s her present, and she’s his future. Just give her the damn ring. Outside, he calls Willow.
Outside Charlie’s, Willow is glad he called. He asks if she wants to get dinner tonight. His place, her place, any place. She has to take a raincheck. A friend has a problem, and she promised to help out. He hopes it works out. She says, her too, and she’s holding him to the raincheck. He says, deal. Someone watches Willow from Charlie’s.
Michael meets Jason and Sonny at the MetroCourt. He ask how Kristina is, and Sonny says the doctor wants them to do a family intervention. Michael says before that happens, he found out Shiloh has an insurance policy, in case members try to leave. Sonny asks, what kind? Michael tells him, they share a secret. Highly sensitive information, as proof of their commitment, but it’s really… Jason says, leverage. Sonny says, Shiloh has something on Kristina, and Michael says, or someone she loves. Someone like him.
Tomorrow, Oscar needs a favor, Shiloh isn’t letting Sam do this alone, and Sonny says Shiloh might have leverage over him.
The Real Housewives of New York City
We backtrack a little, with Sonja gesturing wildly, and saying, you don’t touch the effing Morgan letters. Bethenny asks what just happened. Sonja begins to sob, and Ramona says they didn’t mean to upset her. Sonja says it was awful, and goes into repetitive mode. In her interview, Tinsley suggests an exorcism. Bethenny tries to calm her down, but Sonja says Bethenny wasn’t there. Bethenny takes Sonja aside, and tells her, everything is not a ten. In Ramona’s interview, she thinks going to the house stirred up memories. She’s not surprised at how Sonja is acting. I would suppose being drunk doesn’t help. We flash back to Ramona telling Dorinda that Sonja is going into a hole. Bethenny tells Sonja to pick her battles, while at the table, Ramona, in a flash of genius says, it’s emotional. LuAnn and Dorinda return from outside, and ask how Sonja is doing. Ramona says she had a breakdown, and Bethenny took her from the table. Bethenny says, it’s the winetalking, and Sonja says she has to protect herself, and not lose her sh*t. Bethenny says, that ship already sailed. In a surprise move, Ramona makes sense, and says she doesn’t think they were the original letters. Dorinda says, they’re not. Ramona goes out to tell Sonja the letters weren’t real. Bethenny says they’re not talking about it again. They all go back to the table, and LuAnn asks if it’s over. Sonja says she took the pressure off herself, and is going to have fun. She immediately starts harassing Barbara about going to Bethenny’s room. Bethenny tells her to drink some water. In Bethenny’s interview, she says the best way to handle Sonja is with a muzzle.
Ramona changes into a black teddy. In her interview, Dorinda is puzzled, since there are no men showing up, and the Naked Chef plays for the other team. Ramona flashes her thong. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, everything is a chaotic mess. Sonja loses her sh*t, and Ramona shows up in a negligee. Welcome to the Berkshires. Sonja asks where Coco is, and Ramona says with a helper in the kitchen. In Bethenny’s interview, she says she’s coming back as Ramona. She wants to evolve to the place where she shows up in a silk handkerchief and heels for dinner. What does her after dinner outfit look like? Bethenny says she usually heads upstairs after dinner, but she’s feeling the group, and could use a laugh. She needs dancing and laughing. We see clips of them acting insane. In her interview, LuAnn says, the Berkshires looks a lot crazier when you don’t drink. Barbara says she’s going to bed; she’s scared. Bethenny says, they needed to let loose. With this group, she could tell someone to go screw themselves, and be dancing with them ten minutes later. We’re a group of tough skinned bitches.
In her interview, Sonja says she’s heard rumors about Barbara, and thinks Bethenny is naïve when it comes to these women. Sonja is coming from a place of love admiration; she doesn’t want to get in Bethenny’s pants. In Barbara’s interview, she says, watching the sunrise, she knew her bags were never unpacked, and she was zipping that bitch up, and getting out of there. She tells Dorinda that her house is gorgeous, and she had fun. LuAnn leaves with her. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she accomplished what she needed to do; reestablish a connection with LuAnn, and keep Barbara out of it.
Dorinda and Bethenny go for a walk. Bethenny says Dorinda is going to freak out when she shows her something. When she was in Boston, there was a pad by the hotel phone, and this was on it. She hands Dorinda a paper. Dorinda says she doesn’t get it. She reads, wow,you look spectacular. You’re amazing as always. D. Dorinda asks if Dennis wrote like this, and Bethenny tells her, he always said spectacular. Dorinda says, it’s weird. In Bethenny’s interview, she says Dorinda has experienced death, and is open to alternative approaches. Bethenny thinks he’s trying to send her a message. In her interview, Dorinda says there are signs all over the place. Part of it is, we’re looking for them, but they’re undeniably real. She tells Bethenny that she can make Dennis happy by moving forward.
Back in NYC, Bethenny talks to housekeeper Lanie about having movie night with Brynn and the dogs. Brynn is only into PB&J right now, and Bethenny gets out supplies. Lanie asks if Brynn is having a playdate, but Bethenny says it’s going to be mommy and me. They’re doing art day today, and making cupcakes. She wants to look at the cards she saved from Dennis’s flowers. In her interview, she says she’s seeing someone in Boston. She’s moving forward, but of all the people to lose, Dennis was ever present. She can’t get him t of her head. She looks through old greeting cards, and gets weepy. Lanie misses him too. They look at photos. Bethenny points out one of Dennis and cookie, and one on the night they got engaged. She’d worn the earrings he got for her. In Bethenny’s interview, she says she’s tired of this. It’s not the life she wants, but it’s hard to break away from this. Harder than you think. She tells Lanie, you never know. She should have kept the card from the flowers the new guy sent. Lanie says she saved it.
Ramona is meeting LuAnn and Sonja at a salon, and she brings Coco with her. She says Coco is getting a blowout. She wants Coco with her because she’s getting old, and time with her is precious. She explains that Coco might only have a good year left. In her interview, LuAnn wonders if she’s giving the dog a death wish. The stylist says, dogs are welcome. Ramona tells LuAnn that she was funny when they went out to dinner, and wanted to stay at the hotel. LuAnn says she’s super sensitive right now, and in touch with her emotions. Ramona says she never saw LuAnn like that, and LuAnn says she was pissed and made a scene. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Or, as my father used to add, gets replaced. Ramona is glad she didn’t stay at the hotel. LuAnn says she’s glad too, since she was able to reconnect with Dorinda. In her interview, she says she and Dorinda were like sisters; they were raised the same way. It’s nice to be back as friends, and not in the drama. Sonja joins them, and declines a drink. LuAnn asks if she remembers talking to Barbara at the table. Sonja says she apologized, but had wanted to punch Barbara’s lights out, but she wasn’t the only one to step on toes. Tinsley and Dorinda told Bethenny what LuAnn had said about Bethenny not being queen, and she should have the room. LuAnn doesn’t give a sh*t. In Ramona’s interview, she can’t believe LuAnn is rolling her eyes, since Bethenny helped her when she was on her flat ass. Or flat, drunk ass. Sonja says Bethenny just got LuAnn a lawyer, and remember the intervention? After having to think about that, LuAnn appreciates it, but says the least Bethenny can do is give her the goddam room. I think she’s joking, but then she makes fun of Bethenny, and then I think she’s just being mean. In her interview, she says she never knows where she stands with Bethenny. One day, Bethenny is saving her life, and the next, bashing her with a baseball bat. She tells them if Bethenny wants to be upset with her, bring it on.
Sonja and Ramona go to a flower place. Ramona is happy she and Bethenny are in a good place. She’s getting two arrangements for Bethenny’s dinner party table. She asks what Sonja is wearing, and Sonja tells her not to ask Bethenny dumb [sic] questions that she could google, like what sparkly means. She also thinks Ramona should cool it with the flowers. In her interview, Sonja says Ramona is overdoing it, as usual. They move on to lunch.
Tinsley meets LuAnn for lunch. LuAnn says the crosstown traffic was a nightmare. Tell me about it. The one and only time I ever took a bus was when I thought I could get across town faster than walking. Wrong. LuAnn wonders why we don’t have cars that hover. In her interview, LuAnn says the hardest part of staying sober is not picking up a drink each day. She takes it day by day, and it’s a struggle. Tinsley tells LuAnn that her dad was an alcoholic, and died three years ago. Alcohol didn’t kill him, but he ended up falling when he was drinking, and had frontal lobe damage. He went into a coma, and after two weeks died in a hospice. She hasn’t been around someone with drinking issues since then. Her reaction was always why does she have to walk on eggshells because someone is drinking. She’s angry at him for dying. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she pushes back when someone has a drinking problem. she tells LuAnn that she thinks the person is choosing over their loved ones. LuAnn says, most people think alcoholics chose drinking, but that’s not the truth. It’s a disease. Tinsley starts to cry, saying, she doesn’t see it like that. LuAnn says people can’t control it. Tinsley says if a person is allergic to peanuts, they don’t eat them, but LuAnn says it’s a disease of the mind. The mind doesn’t think correctly. In her interview, Tinsley says she doesn’t have sympathy even when she should, because she lived it. LuAnn says Tinsley needs to forgive her father. Tinsley says she’s still dealing with the loss, and LuAnn says, you go through phases, and she’s stuck in angry. She suggests Tinsley go to Al-Anon, and explains that it helps the families and friends of alcoholics by sharing experiences. She thinks it would help Tinsley. (Very useless trivia. My husband and I both worked for Al-Anon’s main office when we met. Loved my job. Hated non-profit pay.) Tinsley jumps to another subject by telling LuAnn that she’s hosting the Big Apple Circus. In her interview, she says she’s working with a publicist again. He’s been letting people know she’s available to host different events, and she got the gig. She’s going to be the guest ring master. LuAnn thinks she’ll look adorable in the outfit.
Bethenny gets her hair done, while also getting a vitamin IV. The nurse says it will give her energy, but Bethenny doesn’t want any more energy. She just wants health and wellness. In her interview, she says she’s multitasking, and it’s a cluster f**k. She’s giving a dinner party, and has no time to waste. Welcome to her world. She tells the stylist that her ex-boyfriend Russ is there. She didn’t know he was coming, and she’d just had a facial. It’s not when you want to see your ex. He has a staffing company, and any time she’s hired them, he didn’t come. This time, he showed up. She says they dated last summer, and were madly in love, but Dennis came in hot. She phased out and disappeared. It was adisaster. Russ, who is gorgeous and brought his dog, tells Bethenny that he has to go. She asks him to give her five minutes. The stylist says she didn’t expect him to be that fine. Bethenny tells Russ that she’s sorry, and hugs him. He tells her not to scare his guys. She says, they could get scared. They couldget laid, but probably don’t want to. In Bethenny’s interview, she says they’re in for a bumpy ride. Her skin won’t be the only bumpy thing tonight.
It’s Bethenny’s first official party. She hasn’t had a formal dinner party there, and she’s proud of her home. It’s beautiful, but homey, and she wants to use it. In a shocking twist, Ramona asks for vodka in a large wine glass with a lot of ice. Then she asks for a straw. Dorinda suggests giving her a crazy straw, and I literally lol. Lanie brings a metal straw, and Ramona asks if she can take it home with her. Geez. She can’t buy one of her own. Even I have one I bought at a flea marker. Tinsley comes in next, followed by Sonja, who says Bethenny always has the best food. Dorinda says she got flowers from LuAnn, thanking her for the weekend, and saying she was happy they made up. Everyone is thrilled Barbara comes bearing wine. A caviar and vodka spread is brought out. Barbara wonders where LuAnn is, and Sonja says she’ll probably come in wearing a Chiquita headdress. Bethenny says, every day is a cabaret. Ramona tells Bethenny not to be upset, but she has a date at 8 o’clock. Bethenny says, do you, and the bell rings. Bethenny says, the cabaret has begun. She’s an hour and fifteen minutes late. In Bethenny’s interview, she says, when you’re a cabaret star, time means something very different. The Countess is here. The cabaret can begin. LuAnn complains about traffic, and not only did she just use that one, in Sonja’s interview, she says they all came from uptown. She can’t believe LuAnn played the traffic card.
Bethenny says they had a breakthrough in the Berkshires, and toasts to them all being in a good place. And everyone being sparkly. Dorinda toasts Barbara surviving the fish bedroom, saying she’s probably woken up with scarier things than the shark. Taking the high road, Barbara says, it was lovely. In her interview, she says she knows what Dorinda is doing, and she’s not taking the bait like that tacky shark. Bethenny suggests a game of Truth or Dare, which never goes well. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she hates that game, pointing out the last time didn’t go well. We flash back to Carole – who I apparently don’t miss, because I always forget she was on this show – asking how old Tinsley was when she had anal sex. Bethenny says she’ll take either. Ramona says, dare, and asks if Bethenny thinks she’ll fall in love again. I guess Ramona used up her smarts for the day, and they have to explain that’s a truth. Ramona’s excuse is that she’s just enjoying the ambience. In her interview, Bethenny says, when she doesn’t want to strangle Ramona, it’s joyful to laugh with and at her. LuAnn dares Bethenny to kiss Barbara, and she does, declaring Barbara a good kisser. Ramon has to go, and Sonja says she didn’t come to watch Bethenny make out with Barbara. In her interview, Sonja admits to being jealous, and wanting to beat Barbara there. Barbara asks if Tinsley has ever kissed a girl. Tinsley says, never, and Sonja wonders how she and Scott do it. In Tinsley’s interview, she says just because she has manners, and dresses a certain way, doesn’t mean she’s not a freak in the sheets. Dorinda is up next, and says she’ll do anything but show a body part. Bethenny ask about phone sex, but that’s not how Dorinda rolls. In Dorinda’s interview, she imitates someone having phone sex, and says, they’d run. It’s not her thing. Bethenny wants her to call John, and put it on speaker. She calls and says she can’t wait to see him. They haven’t had sexy time in a while, and she misses him. He likes what he hears, and she sends him a huge kiss. The woman are gesturing, but it’s more sweet than sexy. After the call, Dorinda says it was the best she can do. Okay, that was funny. Bethenny hugs her. Sonja says it was good for her. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she can always count on John for sex talk.
Bethenny asks if Tinsley has had phone sex, and that’s another never. Barbara tells her to start tonight. Get Scott on the phone. Bethenny can’t believe they’re not together, and never do it. How many Chanel bags can she get in a week? Sonja says she’d rather have sex than a Chanel bag. Tinsley tells them that she loves him, and to stop it. Bethenny dares her to tell Scott that he’s the love of her life, and she wants to be engaged by the end of the year. Sonja says, just call. Bethenny says she’s got nothing else, and Tinsley gets up. In her interview, Bethenny says she didn’t ask Tinsley to screw Scott in her apartment; just call him. Tinsley and LuAnn go out for a smoke. In Tinsley’s interview, she says when they get boyfriends, they can tell how to react to this. She tells LuAnn that Scott would kill her.
Bethenny tells Sonja that she’s never kissed a woman, but she can’t pass up a dare. In her interview, Tinsley knows they’d be giggling in the background, and Scott would be upset. She doesn’t want to make him mad. She goes back to the table, and Bethenny wonders why be friends if they can’t talk. Barbara says maybe Tinsley doesn’t want to be friends, and Dorinda accuses Barbara of instigating. Barbara says she’s sitting in the group; she’s not staying out of it. Make her. Dorinda fakes some boxing moves, and LuAnn says Barbara has a hammer. In Barbara’s interview, she says Dorinda has a vision to get her. She wonders what she did. LuAnn says she went to the bathroom, came back, and look what happened. Sonja says Barbara was being provocative, saying Tinsley didn’t want to be friends. Bethenny wants to clarify that it’s not Tinsley’s fault. She apologizes for striking a chord, but doesn’t know where the lines are. She doesn’t know what’s a bad thing to do. In her interview, Tinsley says they can all think whatever they want to think. Her relationship with Scott is delicate and tricky. He’s uncomfortable with her being in the spotlight as it is. She’ll be happy if she can get it to all fit together.
Bethenny says Tinsley doesn’t have to tell them anything. She knows it must be hard. Tinsley says it is. She’s trying to make it work every day, and it’s literally torture. Bethenny says Tinsley can’t just be happy when he is; that’s not how it works in life. Tinsley says that’s how it works in her life. In her interview, Bethenny says Tinsley sets women back a hundred years. Tinsley says she doesn’t know what to do; she’s doing the best she can. Dorinda hugs her, and she cries. Dorinda says they’re all going through stuff. In her interview, Dorinda asks, what is she afraid of?Fear shouldn’t be part of this thing called a relationship. Bethenny says she’s really sorry, but Tinsley doesn’t seem that happy. It seems like her relationship is in a box. Tinsley says Scott is different from everyone she’s dated. Bethenny asks if he’s controlling, and Tinsley admits he has some controlling ways. Bethenny says she’s a strong, beautiful woman. Does she need for him to be in control? Tinsley says it’s a juggling act. Every day there’s a new headache. Bethenny thinks she should be with someone who accepts her the way she is. Tinsley whines that she loves him. In Bethenny’s interview, she says Scott is driving the car, but she’s not sure Tinsley is even in the car. She hugs Tinsley, who cries some more. She says it seems like Tinsley is under pressure and stress. It doesn’t seem healthy or happy. She doesn’t have to let him drive. It works for his life, but not hers.
LuAnn says she’d also like to offer some advice. Take the truth, not the dare next time.
Next time, the group goes to the circus (like this isn’t enough of one), LuAnn asks if Ramona hooked up with Mario, Tinsley breaks up and makes up, Dorinda tells Ramona not to lie, and Ramona pushes Dorinda. That last one is probably a really bad idea.
👎 Honestly, this poor girl needs to move on. This is not the dude for her, and she’ll never be happy. She loves the limelight, and he hates her being in it? No. Just no. I think the pressure from Mama Dale doesn’t help either.
👑 A Hotline For the Throne…
This is too funny. Jimmy Kimmel set up a hotline for Game of Thrones questions.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Carly sees Michael at the hospital. She was supposed to meet Sonny there, but they had to reschedule. Michael says let him guess; Sonny is with Kristina.
Sam goes to the DOD house. She says Shiloh looks like she feels. He says he didn’t sleep, and asks if she’s seen her sister. She was going to ask him the same thing; no one has seen her. Shiloh says no one there has either. Sam says her mom hasn’t seen Kristina, and when they call her phone, it goes straight to voicemail. She knows she told him that Kristina can be a flake, but now she’s getting worried. Shiloh says they’ll find her together. They take care of their own at DOD.
At Charlie’s, Brad reads to Lucas from Shiloh’s book. All that matters is being present in the now. Doesn’t it blow his mind? Lucas says, mind blown. Brad doesn’t think he’s too enthusiastic, and Lucas says it’s just not his thing. Brad thinks they need to go to classes. It’s energized him. Lucas can see that, and Brad says there are courses for kids. They can sign up for a family seminar. They can bring Wiley. Shiloh loves him to pieces. Sitting at the bar, Willow overhears.
Valentin asks Nora how her visit has been, and she says, brief. Her case wrapped up already, and she’s headed for the train station. Valentin asks if she can stay put, but she says he’ll have to pay a retainer, and it’s gone up. He tells her to name her price. He needs her services again.
Nina walks into her office while on the phone, and finds Spencer in her chair. She asks what he’s doing there, and he asks if it isn’t unpleasant to have an unwanted trespasser in her sanctorum. He says that word is from the Latin. Nina says, get out of her chair; that’s from Nina. He has the same feeling as when he contemplates his exile from Spoon Island – his rightful home.
Franco sees Cameron sitting outside the principal’s office. He’s obviously been in a fight, and Franco asks, what happened?
Jason sees Elizabeth, and says he needs a favor. He shows her the cup, and asks if she can test the residue, no questions asked. He wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important, but it’s family. The less Elizabeth knows, the better. Elizabeth says there’s a test that’s not the most precise, but it’s quick. Does he want to wait? He says he owes her one, and she takes the cup.
Michael tells Carly that he knows Kristina left DOD, but doesn’t know where she is. Jason joins them, and Carly tells him that Michael is asking about Kristina. Jason says he got her out before anything happened. That’s what Michael figured, but he wanted confirmation. Jason says, she’s in a safe place, but she’s pretty messed up.
Shiloh gives Sam a giant glass of water, and says he’s never seen her rattled like this. When they spoke this morning, she said there was nothing to worry about. She says Sonny hasn’t heard from Kristina either. It’s one thing for their mother, and Kristina’s sisters not to hear from her, but she’d never flake on Sonny. She thinks something is wrong, and Shiloh says they’ll find her together.
Brad tells Lucas that DOD has volunteer opportunities and workshops. Lucas says he’ll think about it. He agrees that Brad is less stressed; he’ll give him that. And he’s not popping antacids like he was. Lucas goes over to Willow, and says they met a few months ago. He introduces himself, and Brad says it’s crazy running into her there. He thought she was moving. She says her plans changed. She likes her life there too much, and doesn’t want to change it. Lucas says the need good teachers. She asks Brad if the book is good, and Lucas says he lives and dies by it. He’s a real believer. They leave, and Willow flashes back to Shiloh finding her, and saying he can always find her, even if she changes her name. She tells him she wants him to leave, but he says that’s not what he wants. She promised to never leave him, and she broke her promise.
Nora tells Valentin, it sounds like it’s of some urgency. Her calendar is full, but if he’s facing criminal prosecution, she can refer him to an excellent attorney in New York. He says it’s a family matter. She did a fantastic job when he was seeking custody of Charlotte. Nora thanks him, and understands he revised the agreement. He tells her that he and Lulu decided to share custody of Charlotte, for Charlotte’s sake. Nora says, mozel tov, reminding us that she’s Jewish, and Passover is soon. He says that Lulu has gone overseas indefinitely, without even a day’s notice.
Nina is sorry Spencer and Valentin are still at odds. She wishes they could make peace. He asks who she’s kidding. She’s part of it, and it’s on her to fix it. She asks how he’d like her do that, and he tells her, put a leash on Valentin; he’s her fiancé. Nina says he’s assuming she can control Valentin, and he asks what else marriage is good for. She says Valentin feels entitled, as does Spencer. She tells him, stop antagonizing Valentin and making him the enemy,
Cameron says his mom was supposed to come, but Franco says she’s at work, and he got the call. Does Cameron want to tell him how the fight started? Was it about a girl? It’s his shot to tell Franco before he hears it from the man. He’s just trying to help. Too late. The secretary asks them to come into the principal’s office. Franco tells Cameron, let’s get it over with.
Jason tells Michael that Kristina is physically away from DOD, but still connected emotionally. Sonny hired an expert to break the hold. Carly says they’re going to need family to show up, and Michael says he’ll be there. He asks how she is, and Jason says, angry. Carly adds, but safe. He knows how Sonny is. He’ll pull out all the stops to get her back. Michael says Shiloh will still be waiting, but Jason says he’s working an angle to take Shiloh down, and Sam is working another.
Sam suggests calling the cops, but Shiloh says she’s an adult, so they have to wait 24-hours before they can report her missing. He intends to find her before that. He has members out looking, and they can go to the hospital. Sam thinks she’ll do more good there, and Shiloh says, where Kristina isn’t? She says she can search Kristina’s room. Maybe she’ll find a clue. He’s not comfortable with that, and Sam asks if he doesn’t trust her. He does, but Kristina trusts them with her privacy. Sam doesn’t care if Kristina is in trouble. Shiloh agrees, saying it’s better to beg her forgiveness later, and find her now. He asks Daisy to help Sam search.
Jason explains that Sam is sending Shiloh off to search; then she’s going to search the DOD house. Carly says there has to be something there to use against Shiloh. Jason asks Michael if Willow gave him any insight. Michael says, he doesn’t think… and his phone rings. It’s Willow, who says she has to see him immediately about Shiloh.
Nora tells Valentin that Lulu’s departure was abrupt, but thinks when you’re attacked by a serial killer, you deserve a vacation. Valentin doesn’t disagree, but he’s not willing to send his daughter to Paris every two weeks. He’s the de facto custodial parent, and wants to amend the custody order. Nora asks him to clarify.
Spencer tells Nina that he wants to express his concern for Charlotte. He and Laura saw him at GH. Lulu is barely gone, and he wants to cut out Charlotte’s grandmother. Nina says he misunderstood, but he says they both know what Valentin is capable of. Take the blinders off, lady. Nina tells him, don’t lady her, and there’s a binding agreement. He says Lulu changed things when she went overseas, but Nina says Valentin has no problem with Charlotte seeing her grandmother, and will make it happen.
Franco brings Cameron to the hospital. Elizabeth asks, what happened? Franco says, good question, but Cameron’s not talking. Not to him or the principal. Elizabeth tells Cameron to wait for her in the examining room. Franco tells her neither one will say what happened, but the school has zero tolerance for fighting. They’ve both been suspended.
Jason tells Carly, Kristina was obviously drugged. He found her on the floor, with pillows all around. Carly says, he drugs them, and sleeps with them? and Jason says, that’s what it looks like. He found a cup lying next to her. It was metal, with engraving on the bottom; the same symbol some of Shiloh’s followers have tattooed on their backs. He took it to Elizabeth to have it analyzed. He wants to find proof that Shiloh is drugging his followers.
Sam tells Daisy that she’s got this, but Daisy says it’s what Shiloh wants. Nothing is as important as finding Kristina. Sam says they know she has her phone and wallet. She wonders what’s in Kristina’s drawers, and Daisy starts to go through them. Sam says it looks like most of her clothes are there. She must have left with a small bag. Daisy doesn’t get why Kristina left, and Sam says she doesn’t either. She was excited about her higher level of achievement. Daisy says, what a disappointment. It’s an honor to be chosen to be close to Shiloh. No one has ever changed their mind. They know what the consequences are. Sam asks, what consequences?
Michael meets Willow at Charlie’s. She’s glad he came quickly; she was afraid she’d change her mind. She’s willing to talk to Kristina, and share her experiences. Michael knows it’s not an easy decision, and Willow says she has one condition; non-negotiable. They can’t be anywhere near DOD or Shiloh. He asks if she doesn’t trust herself around him. Michael asks if she’s afraid he’ll get his hooks in her.
Shiloh sees Brad at the hospital, and asks how it’s going with Wiley and Lucas. Brad says, really good. He’s surprised Shiloh remembered him. Shiloh says their work together is significant. Every drop of water makes an ocean. Isn’t that from The Aristocats? Shiloh asks if he’s going to see Brad again, and Brad says he needs more Zen in his life. He wants to bring Wiley and Lucas. Shiloh says he shows a real aptitude, and Brad thanks him. He sees the cup in Brad’s hands, and I audibly gasp. He asks where Brad got it.
Nina tells Spencer that Charlotte loves Laura. Valentin won’t come between them. Spencer tells her to open her eyes. He needs her to get Valentin to back off. Nina says, back off who? and he says, him. Her knight in shining armor is blackmailing him.
Valentin ask Nora if Lulu can dictate that Laura get half-custody. Nora says, the short answer is no. She can express wishes, but has no legal ground. Valentin asks if there’s a legal avenue she can pursue, and again Nora says the short answer is no. They’d have to relitigate at that point, and then he can voice his own position. He says Lulu left without notice, and he wants to file for full legal custody.
Elizabeth tells Cameron, silence is not an option. He says he handled it. She doesn’t need to know what happened. It will only hurt her, Franco says she’s a strong person, and Cameron tells him, stay out of this. Elizabeth says, hey. He apologizes and asks if he can go, but Elizabeth says he’s not going anywhere until he comes clean. She’ll find out one way or the other. It’s better to find out from him. He says the reason he beat the crap out of Tyler was because he insulted Aiden, calling him a little fairy boy.
Carly asks what Jason thinks about the psychologist Sonny hired. He says he doesn’t like psychologists, and Carly says, still… Jason says he seems to know what he’s doing, but he doesn’t see how he can get through to Kristina. Carly asks how Kristina was, and Jason says, she was pretty out of it, but okay. It was good because she didn’t fight him, and gave him the code to her phone. Until she woke up. Then she was furious. He can’t say he blames her; he did kidnap her. Carly says, for her own good. He says it would help to get hard evidence against Shiloh to give to the cops. Carly is surprised he wants to work with the cops. He says he wants to make Shiloh disappear, but it’s best for Kristina if he goes to prison. She’ll see he’s a con, and it will break his hold once and for all.
Brad tells Shiloh the cup is something he has to test; why? Shiloh says, it’s his. It has special meaning, and went missing from DOD. He asks what it’s being tested for, and I yell at Brad to shut up, but he says, for drugs. Shiloh says he doesn’t now how anybody got it, but it’s someone who wants to discredit DOD and see it fail. Brad wonder why anyone would want that, and Shiloh says, some people don’t understand, and others want to see it fail for more personal reasons. Jason is so obsessed with his ex, he attacked Shiloh. Brad says it was given to him by a nurse close to Jason. Maybe he stole it, and convinced her to run the test. It’s amazing the lengths people will go to. Shiloh says, especially Jason.
Sam asks Daisy what the consequences are for walking away from the Trust. Daisy asks where she heard that term, and Sam says, Kristina maybe. Daisy tells her, forget it. The only people who are supposed to know the name, are a part of it. Sam asks what would happen if she mentioned it to Shiloh. Would she be shunned? Is that what Kristina is afraid of? Daisy says, Shiloh would never shun anyone, especially Kristina. She’s so important to him.
Willow tells Michael if Shiloh was planning on bringing Kristina into the Trust, he’ll be watching her closely. He says her family got there first; she’s with them. Willow says, Shiloh won’t let her go so easily. He stays with you. He’s still in her head now, no matter how many miles are between them.
Carly thinks getting Shiloh out of the way is the obvious solution, but Jason says Kristina is Sonny’s daughter and Sam’s sister. They should decide how to handle it. Carly says they’re too close to this. They’re not seeing Kristina clearly. They assume she can’t handle what’s happening. They’re really undermining her. They don’t have confidence in her, so she has none in herself, and pinballs from thing to thing, trying to find where she fits. Jason says, what if Shiloh disappears, and she breaks down completely? Carly doesn’t know, and he says that’s why they have to let Sonny and Sam decide. Carly says she’s just tired, and thanks him for letting her vent. He tells her, stay there.
Nina asks Spencer how Valentin could be blackmailing him. Spencer says Valentin wants him to tell his grandmother that Charlotte doesn’t want to visit her, but there’s nothing further from the truth. Valentin comes into the reception area, and listens. Nina says she didn’t realize Spencer and Charlotte were friends. Spencer says Valentin wants to cut his grandmother out of Charlotte’s life, and if he doesn’t cooperate, Valentin will sic the Feds on him. Nina says, the FBI? Spencer says Valentin will stop at nothing to get what he wants. He asks her to have a heart. Make Valentin leave him alone. Nina says, give it up. Tell his story to someone else. She saves her pity save for the actual helpless, and he’s anything but. He tells her that she’s a worthy adversary, and worthy of respect. It’s too bad Valentin doesn’t have any for her. If he did, he wouldn’t be keeping a secret with Sasha.
Cameron tells Elizabeth and Franco that Tyler and his friend kept looking at him, laughing. He asked what was up, and they said, nothing. He was about to leave, and Tyler said his sister told him all about Aiden. Elizabeth says, what about him? and Cameron tells her that she said he’s a little fairy boy. Tyler called him Gayden, so Cameron jumped him. They got hauled to the principal’s office, but Tyler won’t be running his mouth anymore. That lying piece of crap. Aiden is a little kid; he’s not like that.
Jason gives Carly a smoothie. She tells him that she’s going to turn into an orange. He tells her as long as she takes care of herself and the baby, he doesn’t care. She says it’s her other baby she’s worried about. Oscar had another seizure. Josslyn was with him. He’s sweet and romantic, and got Josslyn a digital watch. There’s a superstition that at 11:11, someone that you love who has died is reaching out to you. She guesses it’s a way to stay connected. She doesn’t know if she believes it, but they do. They played music, and were dancing, when Oscar collapsed.
Elizabeth says Cameron knows better than to solve problems by fighting. He’s not going to let that tool call his brother fairy boy. How can he say Aiden is gay; he’s a little kid. Franco wonders if the real problem is that he doesn’t want it to be true. Elizabeth says he’s not like the other kids his age. Cameron asks, why? Because he likes Princess Calinda and baking? Elizabeth says, none of those things alone or together would prove that conclusion, but it’s not their job to impose a label on him. It’s their job to love and support him, no matte who he grows up to be. Cameron says, right now, he’s in the third grade, but his classmates have siblings. Unless they’re going door to door, he has to do something. Do they just expect him to take it? Franco says, you bet, and Cameron asks if Aiden can’t be a little less gay.
Nina asks Spencer what’s going on with Sasha and Valentin. Valentin comes in and asks if someone said his name. Spencer says he was telling Nina about when Sasha interrupted them at Windymere. Something shady was going on. Valentin says they were just talking about people. Would Spencer like it if Valentin talked about him?
Brad tells Shiloh, if he doesn’t do something, Jason will keep coming after him. He should have Jason arrested for theft. Shiloh feigns concern that Brad and Jason’s friend will be implicated as accomplices. He says there was only tea in the cup. Just tell Jason, and that will be that. Lucas comes by, and Shiloh says they’ll talk later, and jets. Lucas tells Brad that he’s off tonight. Any chance Brad can knock off early too?
Daisy tells Sam that they’ve gone through everything; there’s nothing there. Sam asks if Daisy has any clue what Kristina might have been feeling. Daisy says, she was excited. Kristina knew it was a privilege. Sam says, maybe the privilege was too much, but Daisy says, Kristina knew what it meant. If she hadn’tbeen fully committed, she wouldn’t have made the pledge. Sam asks what the pledge is exactly. Daisy says, if Sam is fully committed, one day she’ll be chosen, and find out.
Michael tells Willow, it doesn’t sound like having sex with Shiloh is a choice, but expected. She went through the ceremony, and at the end he had sex with her; that’s coercion. She says he didn’t force himself on her, but offered her a place in the Trust, saying it was an honor. That’s how everyone treated it, even her mother. Her mother convinced her that she was special. It wasn’t until she went to school that she realized DOD was built on lies, and Shiloh was just a con man. He was her first; the only man she’d been with, and he used her. Michael says, her baby was Shiloh’s, wasn’t it? and she says, yes.
Carly tells Jason, Josslyn called the paramedics, and went with Oscar. Jason asks how he is now, and Carly says, breathing on his own, and awake, but he only has a few days at most. Josslyn is with him, and wants to be until the end. It’s taking everything not to park herself there, but she can’t do that. She has to wait until Josslyn says she needs her, and keep herself busy. Jason suggests they shoot pool, and she says, don’t tempt her. He needs to bust Shiloh. Nothing is more important than her and Josslyn. He tells her, just call him when she needs him. She promises, and they hug.
Elizabeth says, no one is asking Aiden to be anything other than who he is. Franco says this isn’t about making Cameron’s life easier. Is he upset about the kids talking trash about Aiden, or about who Aiden is? Cameron says he doesn’t want to deal with Aiden being teased; he loves his brother. Franco tells him, prove it by his support. He could have saved a lot of pain if he’d stepped up to the plate. Franco leaves, and Cameron says, he’s wrong about everything. Elizabeth says, he’s angry, and so is she. Cameron is angry and upset on his own behalf, not his brother’s. She leaves, and Cameron pounds the wall.
Spencer tells Valentin not to be hasty. Valentin says he wanted the truth. His phone rings, and Nora says she’s tracking a case that she thinks might prove useful. He thanks her for her quick action, but it’s not necessary. He’s not pursuing reviving the custody agreement. He’s sorry for the trouble. She says, it’s no trouble; he’ll get her bill. Valentin tells Spencer this is the last of his patience. Spencer isn’t getting another chance. Go. Spencer runs out. Nina asks if he really blackmailed Spencer, and Valentin says, he’s a kid. It was just leverage to guarantee the truth. Sasha tells him, don’t count on it. Spencer will do anything to make him look bad. Was there something going on with Sasha? He says he offered Sasha money to join her in New York, but Sasha said no. Nina says, she’s a proud woman, but Valentin says, not as proud as her mother.
Brad brings the cup back to Elizabeth, who’s talking to Jason. He says he ran the test. Jason asks what he’s talking about, and Brad says, the results are back. There were no drugs; nothing. Just tea and Valerian root. By the look on his face, Jason doesn’t believe it.
Shiloh comes back to DOD. Sam asks if he found Kristina. He says he checked GH and Mercy, but she wasn’t there. He thinks he knows what happened though. He thinks Jason kidnapped her.
Brad looks full of himself. Lucas tells Brad that his paperwork is finished, and he’s heading out. Brad says he was talking to Shiloh about taking the next class. How about it?
Willow tells Michael, as soon as she found out she was pregnant, she made her escape. She couldn’t let Shiloh find out. He’d mold his child into one of his blind followers. Michael is sorry, but glad she broke away. Shiloh got away, but she protected her baby and lost it. She says he has it wrong, but it’s her fault. She’s been lying to him. The baby didn’t die.
Franco tells Nina that they need to talk to their step-kids, Michael knows who Willow’s adoptive family is, and Jason asks Brad if he’s involved with DOD.
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
Returning to the show where I’ve started disliking people I used to like, or at least didn’t bother me. I’m still good with Denise though, and of course LVP can do no wrong.
Denise is getting ready to have Dorit over. She tells trainer Mikey that Dorit weighs an ounce, and probably won’t eat, but they have snacks. She makes some drinks, and says that Dorit has two little kids, so she could use a double. The seltzer sprays everywhere when she opens it, and she claims she’s not used to using it in her drinks. Dorit arrives and meets Eloise, In Denise’s interview, she says she liked Dorit right away. It was sweet of Dorit to invite her to the Bahamas, when Dorit only knew her a few seconds. There’s also a lot to talk about. She puts blankets on the couch so Dorit doesn’t sit on dog hair. Celebrities – they’re just like us! Denise is anyway.
They talk about how tight their schedules are. Dorit says she feels blessed, and adores her husband. Denise asks how long PK has known LVP, and Dorit says they go back to their London days. They’re close; like brother and sister. Denise asks if they’ve talked recently, and Dorit says, no. The last time they spoke was at Denise’s wedding. Dorit knows LVP cares for her, but believes the Radar Online article came from her, and that she then called TMZ. In her interview, Dorit says, if you have nothing to hide, why would you hide? Denise says she’s coming from a place where she was dragged through the mud, embarrassed, and felt like she needed to defend herself. In her interview, she says when she got divorced from Charlie, she would try to find out who was leaking things by telling them false information. If she saw it in print, they were out. She had to live in a bubble. Dorit wants to go back to trusting LVP, but Denise thinks it will take some time. They go outside to check out the beautiful view. Dorit asks how long they’ve lived there, and Denise says, just over a month. They wanted something simple, Zen, and peaceful. Dorit knows what she means.
Kyle sets up the place cards for Camille’s shower. She wants to make sure there’s no awkwardness. In Kyle’s interview, she says she wanted to throw Camille a shower because it’s an exciting time in Camille’s life, and she loves throwing showers. Seating is everything. She’s seen women come in early, and move place cards, so she’s got to watch out for those people, The last time she spoke to LVP, they had a big argument. Yay. We get to see some of that again. She wants the day to be special for Camille, and her OCD is in overdrive.
LVP’s kitchen is getting torn apart. Steven tells Ken – Giggy! – it’s too late to change his mind. LVP wonders what she was thinking. In her interview, she says she’s emotionally scattered. Everything is coming at her from all angles. She says, the last time she stood there, she was with a friend of hers, and we see another clip from the argument. She takes a couple of swings at the old kitchen with a hammer, and says, at least Kyle was only a bitch in the kitchen. If she’d followed LVP through the house, this might be more expensive. She’s looking forward to it being brighter; it was dark and depressing. She wants to make some tea, but finds a bottle of wine that’s preferable.
The corrupt Faye Resnick arrives, and asks Kyle if it’s okay to wear white. Kyle explains that it’s weddings where you shouldn’t wear white. I just shake my head, although I know someone who thought all guests were supposed to wear the same color at a wedding, not knowing that was only for the bridesmaids. Teddi says, it looks amazing, and asks if everyone’s coming. Kyle says she invited everyone. In her interview, Camille appreciates Kyle’s offer to throw her a bridal shower. It’s tough to move ahead, and she wasn’t sure if she’d find love again, but David made her believe in love again. LisaR says Erika texted that she’s in tour hell, and can’t make it.
At the rehearsal studio, Mikey says, they’re seven days away from… Erika says, greatness. Mikey says, that too, but their first show in Jersey. In Erika’s interview, she says it’s the final days of rehearsal. There’s no time for a social life, family life, or any other life but show life. She’ll catch Camille at the next wedding. Erika’s choreographer gives some notes. In her interview, Erika says, as a child, she had big dreams, but as you get married, have kids, get divorced and remarried, priorities change. Life takes a different path. When the road opened wide at age 35, she took advantage. We’re the masters of our own destiny. Follow your dreams, and have a kickass checkbook. While rehearsing, Erika gets a knee to the jaw, and I try not to laugh. Mikey asks if she’s okay. Erika says, no, but she doesn’t want to make it a big deal. She tells us, with live shows, anything can happen, but the show must go on. That’s the way it is. They do that circle thing, even though it’s kind of early for that. Doesn’t that come before an actual show?
LisaR tells everyone her mom Lois is in town, and we see a clip of LisaR greeting her. In her interview, LisaR says her mother is almost 91, so when she can spend time with her, every second count. Food and drink happens. Camille opens gifts, and gets a tiara, which she promptly puts on. Kyle thanks everyone for coming to celebrate Camille. She says they’ve had their ups and downs – we flash back to her calling Camille a liar – and she’s excited for her and David. They deserve happiness. Dorit tells Kyle she was with Kyle’s sister Kathy last night. In Kyle’s interview, she says one good thing about American Woman not being picked up, is she and her sisters are speaking again. Everything is good, and they’re having fun again. She traded one for the other. Camille asks where LVP is. In her interview, Camille says she’s disappointed LVP isn’t there. LVP doesn’t need to punish her. Kyle asks if she’s coming to the wedding. Everyone agrees that even when you’re having problems with people, you should show up. Are you kidding? With this crowd. Who wants to be eaten alive? Camille says LVP told her be strong when the same thing happened with her. Kyle thinks Camille should send a text saying LVP was missed. In LisaR’s interview, she thinks that’s being passive/aggressive, and Camille should say she’s hurt. Camille thanks everyone for helping her celebrate this special time in her life.
Kyle drives some weird little car to the Mediterranean market with Portia. In her interview, Kyle says she saw a guy driving what looked like a lux go cart. He says it was called a Vanderhaul, and she thought it would be a fun toy. Plus it was cheaper than a vintage Jag. She’s scared driving it though. At the market, she gives Portia her own basket. In her interview, she says, as a mom, she wants do everything for them, like her mom did. She tells Portia that she’s got this. There’s a problem when it comes to loading the car, since it doesn’t hold much. Kyle says it’s a fun car, but not functional. Don’t take it shopping unless you’re not hungry. She crams what she has in the car, and Portia has to sit on top of some of it.
LisaR, her daughters, and Lois go to a high-end spa. The doctor is surprised that Lois is 90. LisaR suggests an IV bag. In her interview, she says her mom is low maintenance. She’s never had a massage, a facial, or even a pimple. She’s kind of a freak of nature. Lois taught her; age is about attitude. If you feel young, you’ll be young. Nice try. She says Lois must think they’re crazy. Amelia says Harry is home watching the news on all their TVs. In LisaR’s interview, she says, since Harry came back from camping, the Kavanaugh hearings have everyone on edge. To see a woman being put in a vulnerable position, and being made fun of and not believed, is effed up. LisaR wants to try the infrared bed. In her interview, she says the purpose of the bed is… she doesn’t really know the effing purpose. The girls do cryotherapy, and scream the whole time. Not surprising, since it’s minus 140 degrees. When LisaR comes out, she says she’s like a new person. We could only hope. In her interview, she says this is probably all bullsh*t, but she’ll buy it quicker than anyone.
In the car with Lois, LisaR says she’s buzzing, and could run a marathon. Too bad she’s not doing QVC today. Lois says she doesn’t watch it much; it’s boring. LisaR says, thanks a lot. They go to a restaurant, where there’s a private table, and the rest of the gang (minus LVP) gathers, along with some other friends. In Kyle’s interview, she says she loves when Lois visits. She’s hilarious. What woman this age travels, and is super cool and fun? How about Betty White? She says, they don’t make them like her every day. LisaR shows off her $5K tiny handbag. In her interview, she says she’s been low key with the big purse thing. She doesn’t spend a lot, but everyone wants a Hermes bag, especially where they live. They’re all superficial and effed up. Everyone talks among themselves. Denise says it’s surreal seeing LisaR’s girls, since hers are going to be that age soon. She wishes she could keep them young forever. The kids jet, since they have to get up early. What’s wrong with this picture?
Kyle asks Camille if she’s heard from LVP. Camille says she texted that she missed LVP at the shower, and LVP said she wasn’t invited. Kyle is like, what? and says, it’s such a joke. She didn’t leave a stone unturned, and shows Camille the message was delivered. She asks what Camille said, and Camille tells her that she said she didn’t know LVP wasn’t invited, and would have wanted her there. She shows Kyle the texts. In her interview, Kyle knows it’s not fun being honest with LVP, but can’t believe Camille just said she didn’t know. Lois thinks it’s bullsh*t. LisaR says she invited Harry, but it’s a big day politically because of the Kavanaugh hearings. Everything is changing. Camille says she has a different point of view. There’s not enough evidence. When you’re going up against something like that, you need to have witnesses lined up. She thinks if that happened, you would tell someone. Teddi doesn’t agree. Camille says you would tell your boyfriend or your parents. LisaR’s friend Robin says she was attacked in seventh grade, and never said anything. Camille says she was too, but she told people. LisaR says the woman told her husband, but Camille says that was years later. LisaR asks if Camille doesn’t believe her, and Camille says it’s a he said/she said situation. It pisses her off. LisaR says she’s not getting anything out of telling the world, and she’s a doctor. Camille asks if LisaR believes that anyone who holds a PhD is right. Teddi asks how Camille would feel if no one believed her. As usual, she asks stupid questions, since she came late to the party. Camille says that’s her priority. These are serious allegations, and she feels bad for the judge and his family. LisaR thinks she would be more empathetic, and Camille says, she is, but she’s also been accused of things she hasn’t done. In her interview, Camille says when she was going through her divorce, she was maligned. We flash back to a reunion, where Andy runs down a list of insults hurled at Camille. Camille says it’s horrible to go through that when you’ve done good things. She empathizes with what the judge is going through, since she’s been in that position. She knows what it feels like to be wrongfully accused, and humiliated all over the world because of lies. In LisaR’s interview, she thinks Camille comparing herself to Kavanaugh is weird. It’s not about Camille; it’s about something much bigger. She tells Camille that he’s going to be a judge for the rest of his life; it’s a big thing. Kyle says her mother told her to never talk about religion, politics, or sex in a public setting, and wants to change it up. Dorit says it doesn’t sound like a discussion about politics. LisaR thanks everyone for coming, and says this is for her mom. They all toast to Lois.
Kyle says, guess who’s there, and watching them. It’s her sister Kim. They wave to her downstairs, and Kim holds a menu in front of her face. We flash back to her returning the infamous bunny to LisaR at the reunion. Kyle goes downstairs, and Kim says, what are the odds?
Dorit asks LisaR how she feels about seeing Kim. LisaR says she’s fine with it. Kim is a human existing on the earth like she is. They wonder if Camille left, but she’s crying on the stairs. She tells Kyle that she doesn’t know why she’s so upset, but she’s been accused of things she’s never done. It’s horrible to be put in that position. Kyle says, it’s okay to have a difference of opinion. Camille asks her to be a bridesmaid, and Kyle says she’d love to. In Kyle’s interview, she says she never thought she’d be asked by Camille at the bottom of the stairs while she was crying. Camille goes back upstairs, and says she’s not going to make excuses for her opinions. LisaR asks if she hurt Camille’s feelings, and Camille says she’s been the victim of a smear campaign, and it hurts. LisaR sits next to her, and she cries on LisaR’s shoulder, which I find a tad hypocritical on LisaR’s part. Teddi tells Camille that he doesn’t have that power anymore. LisaR says she’s moving to a new life, and deserves it.
Kyles sister Kathy is there too, and Kyle wonders if life could get stranger. There are ten thousand restaurants, and by coincidence, they all picked the same one. She’s happy they’re on speaking terms. Kim congratulates Camille, as LisaR strides past her. In LisaR’s interview, she asks why she should give two sh*ts, and say hello. Out of sight, out of mind, and she’s not thinking of Kim. She tells Lois that she just walked by. Again, kind of hypocritical when she was just saying they were both humans, blah-blah-blah.
Back home, LisaR tells Lois that she’s stunning. LisaR is exhausted, with all these dogs. They went from one to three. Really? Three dogs is exhausting when you have all that money and can hawk dusters on QVC all night? Ugh. I like her less and less. Lois doesn’t know how she manages. LisaR asks what Lois thought about the dinner. She says it was wild. She never heard them talk about politics. LisaR says they usually don’t, but it’s timely. Women are now being honest about rape and sexual harassment, when they’ve been quiet a long time. Lois says she was lucky. She shouldn’t be here, and neither should LisaR. In her interview, LisaR says, years before she was born, her mother was attacked by someone she worked with. He picked her up at the bus stop, but instead of taking her home, drove down a deserted road. Lois says he had a hammer in one hand, and a knife in the other, and tried to rape and kill her, but the military police knew no one should be driving there, and followed him. They saved her that day. She was the first one where he went to jail. He was in prison for seven and a half years, and after he got out, became a serial killer, murdering sixteen to eighteen women. We see newspaper headlines about the Trailside Killer. Holy! Lois can’t remember what she told her. LisaR says Lois couldn’t smell anything, and had metal plates in her head, but told her a kid on the playground had hit her with a hammer. When Lois finally told her the truth (on WWHL, LisaR said she was eighteen when Lois gave her the real story), she was filled with sadness and empathy, but not just because it happened. Lois had stuffed her feelings. Lois says she didn’t want LisaR to grow up scared. LisaR thought Lois was overprotective, and Lisa never quite trusted people. She says she must have put out the energy that no one should screw with her. she’s one of the few people she knows who’s never been harassed or attacked. In LisaR’s interview, she says it takes courage to come forward. The least we can do is show them compassion. She tells Lois that she’s strong, and Lois says LisaR will probably live to be 105 or more.
Later this season, LVP opens her Vegas restaurant, Boy George performs, Erika performs, rock climbing happens, rosé all day happens, Brandi (blech) gets together with Denise, Camille’s wedding happens, Denise talks to LVP, Camille’s house burns down, and Camille and Denise argue. Geez. Maybe this show is getting too depressing.
Lushion paces near Kelly’s hospital room, saying, dammit Kelly. The prosecutor (whose name I don’t remember and got tired of searching for) asks what he’s doing there. He says, guarding Kelly. She says that’s what she heard. She spoke with the doctor, and it turns out nothing is wrong with Kelly. Lushion says, that’s good, and the prosecutor says Kelly is getting escorted back to jail now. Lushion thinks she should talk to Kelly, but she says she has nothing to say. She asks if he didn’t see her press conference. He says they have mountains of evidence and she refuses to listen to reason. She says a jury of twelve will do that, and asks him to move. He steps aside, and two officers go in. I can’t believe how cool Lushion is being. The prosecutor asks what’s wrong with him; he needs to let this go. That girl is goingdown. She says he can leave now, and goes into Kelly’s room. She comes back out, and says, not so fast. He says, damn.
They have a problem. They don’t have the right key for the cuffs. The prosecutor tells Lushion to come back and uncuff her. He goes inside, and Kelly is in the bed. He’s confused, as we all are, but says… um, nothing. Kelly says she can’t go back. She wants to talk to Justice. Lushion says he’ll see what he can do, and tells her, stay strong. He uncuffs her, and says he’s working on this. He’ll see her soon. The officers come in, and I notice that, oddly, Kelly is wearing clothing underneath her hospital robe. The prosecutor tells Lushion, if she didn’t know better, she’d think something improper was going on. He says if he didn’t know better, he’d think she didn’t want justice. She says she does; justice for Travis. He was thevictim. She’s talking the truth, and Lushion says, the truth is, she wants to be reelected. She sits on her ivory throne, and is so busy, she won’t take the time to see how wrong this is. If she did, she’d see they have evidence that Travis was stalking Kelly, but all she cares about is a win. She could care less about putting a good woman in jail for life. She says she’s not. She wants the death penalty.
Esperanza comes to Larry’s office. She wants to find a legal way to get her ex to leave her alone. Larry says, don’t they all. Tell him more. She says he’s harassing her at work, and threatens every person she tries to date; they’re scared to be around her. He’s making her life a living hell. Larry suggests a restraining order, but she says they work in the same building. Larry says they can get him fired for sexual harassment. She says they have a daughter together. She doesn’t want to go that route. She just wants to find a way to get him to leave her alone. Larry asks what route she wants to take. Esperanza says there are certain things she knows; dates, times, and dirty deeds he’s done. Larry says, tell him more, but she doesn’t want do that. He asks how she wants him to do that if she won’t tell him anything? She asks if Larry can hire someone to kill him. Larry says he can’t do that, and wouldn’t advise it. She says she was kidding. He doesn’t think so, but says, so was he. She doesn’t want to ruin his life, but Larry says, some people’s lives should be ruined. She doesn’t want a restraining order, or to file charges, and she doesn’t want to kill him. Larry doesn’t know how to help. Esperanza wants to threaten to take sole custody of their daughter if he doesn’t leave her alone. Larry says, if he’s as bad as she says he is, a judge will be more than happy to consider that. She thinks it will make him calm down. Has she met Eddie? Larry thinks they can do that, and Esperanza says she wants to speak to him first. If he won’t listen, she’ll move forward. Larry is more than happy to help. She asks what it will cost, and Larry says, off record, getting even with him is fine. Esperanza asks if he had a bad experience, and Larry says, he did, but he loved it. It was like rocket fuel for him. Esperanza leaves. Larry laughs, and makes notes.
Randal stomps into his house. He makes a drink, and nods to himself. He calls Marcie. She answers, what? like I do when I’m pissed at the caller. He says she thinks she’s so damn smart. She tells him, don’t call again, but he says he will. She thinks she’s smart. She says he made her lose the baby. She’s trying not to think about the pain he caused. She’s concentrating on work and moving on. She thinks this is smart actually. Randal loses it, and she says she’s past dealing with him. He asks if she’s going to run and tell Brad, and she says maybe she’ll send him to kick Randal’s ass again. Ha-ha! Randal says, yawn. He’s going to get even. She says, you do that.
Macie calls Brad, who asks how she is. She says she’d be better if she could get Randal to stop calling. Brad calls him an, indolent prick, which sounds nearly posh with his accent. Marcie asks if Alex signed the papers, and Brad says, not yet. She wanted a lawyer go over them. Marcie says, it’s probably for the best. If there’s no counsel, she could contest it, like Randal. She says there’s nothing she can do about it – except find a drug addict to kill him. Maybe Wyatt (HAHN) could use a job. Brad says she doesn’t want to end up in Kelly’s shoes; try and let it go. She says she’s trying; Randal isn’t. She wishes they could move away to another town. He does too, but the kids are there. She says she’ll be home at seven, and he asks if she’d like to go out to eat. She says she’d like that, and he says he’ll see her then.
Tanya sleeps on the couch. Ben sits in a nearby chair. She wakes, and says she slept a long time. He asks how she feels, and she says, better. How bad was it? He says, not that bad, and she says, don’t lie. He asks how much she remembers. She says she remembers being cold, and the neighbor, the psychologist. He came to the house; it was weird. She doesn’t want to talk to him again – ever. She wonders if everybody’s going to be looking at her like she’s insane. He says, they seem like nice people, but she says, so did the last ones. He says, that was different. She doesn’t like being stared at. She’s alone, in a new place. Ben suggests they get to know their new neighbors. Alex seems nice, and Natalie from downthe street. Tanya says, not today. He asks what she’s going to do, and she thinks she’ll finish her book. He thinks that’s a good idea, and she says, she’ll make him lunch. He says, perfect. She apologizes, and he sits next to her. He says, don’t, and she asks why he stays with her. He says because he loves her. She gives him all he needs. She says she can’t give him a child, and he asks if that’s why she stopped taking her meds. She says she can’t have a baby, but she wants one. He says she can’t stop taking her meds. She insists she was fine until Randal talked to her. He says she thought she was fine. She swears she was, but he tells her, don’t do it again. After they get settled in, they’ll talk about adoption or a surrogate. She says they can’t afford one, but he says they’ll work toward it. She’s all the family he needs. He loves her. She says she loves him too, and he tells her, she’s going to be okay, and holds her. For a moment there, I thought I was watching a Tennessee Williams play.
Natalie calls Marcie to check on her. Marcie say she’s been having a hard time since she lost the baby. Natalie is sorry, and Marcie says she’s been through it before. At least she’s divorced. Natalie congratulates her, and Marcie asks how Kelly is doing. Natalie says, she’s better. Marcie says, no man isworth taking your life, and Natalie adds, especially a sorry ass loser. Marcie says Natalie’s got a good one. Natalie agrees, and says she’ll kill a bitch to protect him. She asks if the police talked to Marcie, and Marcie says, no. Natalie wonders why, and Marcie says, no proof, and if they do show up, Larry will handle it. Brad comes in with flowers, and Marcie says she’ll call Natalie back. She ask Brad, why? and he says she deserves them. She has a few more calls, and he asks if she can make them from the car. He has a surprise. They’re going somewhere nice. It’s their first official date. She says she’s ready, and they leave.
Sitting on the front porch, Randal looks at Tanya and Ben’s house with binoculars. Natalie sees him, and walks up to the porch, startling him when he sees her magnified. She asks what he’s doing, and he says, looking in the house. She says she’s going to tell Tanya’s husband, and Randal says he’ll tell him that she’s ghetto as hell. Like this is a threat. She says she’s cut his ass before. Tanya is a woman alone, and she’s not well. Randal says Natalie isn’t well, and she says he’s crazy as hell. He says, damn right. Welcome to his world. She wishes his ass burned up in the fire. She tells him that it was her, but he says that’s too smart for her. She says, you only need cheese to catch a rat. Leave that woman alone. She’s telling her husband. Randal says, go. Tell him.
At the station, Esperanza tells Eddie that she needs to talk to him. He says that thing she’s doing with her mouth is talking, but she says, not here. Somewhere more civil. He says, her, him, and her bedroom works. She doesn’t want to argue, and tells him to focus. He looks at her butt, and says he’s focusing. She asks him to meet her for lunch, and he wonders if she’s going to poison him. She says she has something to scare him, but he says there’s nothing scary about her unless she’s in between waxes. She says she’ll text him the restaurant. He says he’ll be there.
Ben leaves the house, and I wonder why Natalie didn’t go straight over there. He knocks on Randal’s door. Randal asks how his wife is, and Ben says, good. She said Randal talked to her. He asks what Randal talked about, and Randal says, the neighborhood. Ben asks if that’s it. Randal asks what she said. Ben says she has a mental illness, and Randal says he picked up on that. It’s a shame. Ben says, yes it is. They’re new in the neighborhood, and Randal can do them a favor by not talking to her. Randal says, that’s a little rude, and Ben says, yeah, but necessary. Randal says, okay. He won’t say anything, butshe’s going to have another break. Ben says, she just needs to take her meds. Randal says, what if she doesn’t? and reminds Ben that he helped Tanya. Ben appreciates it, but says, don’t talk to her again. Randal asks if he’s the jealous kind, and Ben says, no; the loving kind. Randal laughs, and says, isn’t that cute? Ben tells Randal, have a nice day. When he’s gone, Randal stomps out of his house, and walks over to Alex’s, saying, no rest for him. He’ll make that crazy bitch even crazier.
Randal knocks on Alex’s door, and she lets him in. He says she looks good, and she says this is about the baby. He says, RJ, and she says, his name is Brad. He says they’ll talk about that, and she says they have a few things they need to talk about. She asks if he’s been drinking; that’s one deal breaker. He can’t drink when he comes over. He asks who the hell she thinks she is, setting ground rules. She says, pleasedon’t drink, okay? He says, all right, and asks where the baby is. Alex says, upstairs, and he says, in thebedroom? practically wiggling his eyebrows. Alex says he’s here to see the baby; that’s is it. She needs to talk to him about the baby. She thinks there was a mix up at the lab, and wants another DNA test. He says she told him the doctor switched the results. Alex says, she didn’t. Randal says, then how did it come back that it wasn’t his kid. She doesn’t know, and he tells her not to play with him. Is she trying to trick him? She says, not at all. He asks did she sleep with someone else? and she says, no. He wonders, why take another test? She says she was doing research. There have been cases where a child came out with a recessive gene, and looks like the great-grandparent. Randal asks if she has Black great-grandparents. She doesn’t, and he asks, does Brad? She says, no, and he asks what the hell she’s talking about. She says she needs to be sure, and he says, no. He asks if she’s saying is that she was with someone else, but she says she wasn’t. He says she told him that he’s the only Black man she was ever with. If that’s true, she doesn’t need to take the test. She says, forget it, and asks if he wants to see the baby or not. He says he wants a real good look. Who was she with? The mailman? She says now he’s just being ridiculous. He says all this time alone here, and there have been no other men? She says he’s paranoid. Forget she brought it up. He says he’s still suing the doctor. Alex repeats, she didn’t do it, but he says no way the test should have come back as not his. She says, doesn’t he want to know what happened? He knows damn well it’s not Brad’s baby. Don’t let him find out it’s not his baby. Does she hear him? If she thinks he did something to her before, let him find out that’s not his baby. She asks if he wants to see him, and he says he wants to study him. His face, nose, feet, hands, and fingers. Alex says, fine, come see his son. I would so not be alone with this guy.
Eddie meets Esperanza at the restaurant. She already ordered his favorite. Eddie asks if she’s going to tell him she’s dying. She wishes he’d apologize, and he says he’s sorry she sent her boyfriend to beat him up. Esperanza says he’s not her boyfriend, and Eddie started everything. He says her opening her legs started it. She says she didn’t come here for this, and he asks why they’re here. She says they’ve been doing this way too long. She wants to find way they can be civil, and co-exist for their daughter. He says he is civil. She says he’s the most uncivil person she knows. When they met, he was completely different. He insists this is the way he’s always been. He played the good guy to get her to fall in love with him. She asks if he won’t consider changing for their daughter, and if he’s just going to continue using drugs, harassing her, and everyone she knows. He says if he ain’t happy, no one is going to be. She says she’s tried talking, giving him the benefit of the doubt; she’s tried everything. She wants sole custody.
Eddie tells her, get out of here, and Esperanza says she doesn’t want him around their daughter without supervision. She has a list of sh*t he’s done that she knows about. He says, she’s serious? She wants him to leave her alone. He says he’d never hurt their daughter. She says when done talking judge, nothing he has to say will matter. He thinks Steven put her up to this, and she asks if he’s crazy. He yells that he’d like a side of get this bitch out of my face. She slaps him, and says she’s tried everything. Now she’s threatening him. If she puts the list she has in front of a judge, he’ll never see his daughter again. He says he’ll put her in a box, and she says she’ll get a lawyer. He calls her a bitch again. She slaps him again, and asks if he’s dense in the head. Get prepared; she’s calling a lawyer. He says she can’t afford one, and she says, wrong. Larry will take the case.
He tells her to get out of his face. She says, gladly. She fishes in her purse, but can’t find her wallet. He laughs, and asks if anyone wants free p*ssy. She’ll do it for a burger. He suggests she call her boy toy. He tells her not to think of walking out; he’s an officer. She say she’s not stealing, and he asks if she thinks he won’t take her to jail. The manager comes over, and says, it’s okay. She comes there all the time. Eddie tells him to get his fat ass away, and Esperanza tells Eddie to stop. He grabs her, and cuffs her. He says he should have done this a long time ago. Don’t make him hit her for resisting. He tells the restaurant patrons, enjoy lunch.
Dr. Raston goes to Alex’s house. She tells Alex that she’s been calling. They need to talk. Alex invites her in. The doctor says she had to go to the Board, and tell them what Alex did. She’s also talking to a lawyer today. Alex is truly sorry. Dr. Raston says she reran the test. She thought Alex would like to know the result before Brad does. She hands Alex a manila envelope. Alex reads what’s inside, and says, oh my God. She and the doctor look at each other.
Next time, Dr. Raston knows Alex has another secret, Esperanza tells Kelly that Eddie is done, and Tanya threatens to call the police on Randal.
🐰 It’s Not About the Bunny…
For several reasons. It’s going to be Easter soon, it’s way late, and in case you came late to the party.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
For a moment, I was unsure if I was suddenly transported to France in the middle of the night, and didn’t realize, since I turned on GH and saw news footage of the fire at Notre Dame. Over and over and over. I figured it was a possibility, since we’d had a mother of a storm in the wee hours. I personally slept through it – I slept through Hurricane Sandy – on the third floor – but by the havoc my dogs wreaked, it looked like it had blown through the house. Maybe we’d had done an Oz thing, and ended up in Paris. Anyway, because I was still in the US, and it was only the usual incessant coverage of a big story, there was no GH today. A half hour in, we were treated <cough> to an encore presentation of the day Lulu woke up from Ryan’s attack. A new episode will be shown tomorrow. There’s a cup of soap tea below to tide you over.
And it did bring to mind this quote: God gave Noah the rainbow sign, no more water, the fire next time! – Mary Don’t You Weep, a Negro spiritual. Just saying…
Vanderpump Rules
Fluffy! Giggy! LVP meets Ken at SUR, giving Giggy a kiss first, as I would. She asks Katie, what’s happening with Girl’s Night? Katie wants to do more, but not once a week. LVP suggests twice a month, but Katie says she isn’t interested in being a club promoter. She just did it because everyone was saying no one could bring in people like James did. LVP says Girl’s Night was a success, and Katie brought it to her. Katie says, it’s a lot of work, and Ken says Tuesdays haven’t been the same without James. In Katie’s interview, she can’t believe James is irreplaceable, and thinks SUR is doing fine without him. LVP agrees James was bad news, but at least committed. Katie was thinking of more down the road. In her interview, LVP says she’s supportive of Katie, but people will be pissed if Girl’s Night is canceled. She tells Katie maybe she should think about doing something sooner, since Schwartz’s check was like a big rubber ball. Katie says he forgot the account was closed. I so don’t understand that. How many accounts does he have that he can forget something like that?
Tom plays a d*ck flute, which is basically a song flute shaped like a d*ck. James comes over, and asks how Mexico was. Tom and Ariana both say, fun, but horrible. In James’s interview, he says it was probably Schwartz and Katie fighting the entire time. They’re an old, fat married couple. Good Lord. What does this dude have against fat people? I’m not inferring they’re fat either. It’s just that he uses it constantly as an insult. He says, a couple dinners with sleepy, dozy, horsey Kristen. He doesn’t need it. Ariana says she’s going to Lala’s performance with Kristen. Tom says, it started with a kiss. Now Kristen is taking Ariana on dates. She’s his dumpling, and Kristen can’t have her. Ariana says Lala has a short fuse, and she gets it – it’s the five year anniversary of her dad’s death – but the fight or flight has to stop. She says James has been there; it’s kind of his thing. James says he hasn’t been instigating lately, but Tom says Billie wants him to DJ her brunch, and he can’t do it because of what happened with Lala. James says he’s leaving. He had nothing to do with it. He guesses they’re all not friends anymore, and this is the end of him. He says, bye, and walks out. Ariana says, all right, and suddenly, James is back in the apartment. He says, this is bullsh*t, and Ariana says they’re just trying to help. He tells her, they’re all pushing him to the end of the island, and Ariana says she’s not doing anything. He says Tom told him, do his job, and keep his head down, and he’s still being excluded. Tom says he’s screwed up so many times, all of his actions are under a microscope. In his interview, Tom says James is held to a different standard, and has to take it in stride. Ariana says he’s done plenty, and now he just has to do what he needs to do. He says he’s only doing his best for so long. Straight up.
Stassi is doing her photo shoot for Next Level Basic. The book is about embracing your basic bitch. Beau and Katie come for moral support. In her interview, Stassi says she feels like Carrie Bradshaw. She wants to try different basic bitch poses and props; like an iced vanilla latte. She poses like she’s taking a selfie. Basically, she’s just trying to be Scheana. Katie shows her the invite flyer for the puppy shower. She says she was invited, but said no. She said wtf? The photographer tells her to play it up, and they’re done. She says now that she has the hot photos, she needs to finish the book. They head to the coffee bar. Katie says the basicness is rubbing off on them. Out of Stassi’s earshot, Katie asks how Beau feels dating an author. He says he’s been thinking a lot of the stress in Mexico was about the book. Katie says Stassi talking to her about some of it. We see a clip of Stassi telling Katie that she has trust issues, and she’s afraid of it ending. Katie tells Beau that Stassi is used to self-sabotaging. Now that she has a great guy, she doesn’t think she deserves it. Katie thinks she’s scared. Beau says he sees it too. In her interview, Katie says if Stassi doesn’t stop lashing out, she’s going to lose the love of her life. It’s time to do something drastic.
Brittany and Jax go to therapy. Brittany tells therapist Lindsey that she has people coming in for the engagement party on Tuesday. In her interview, Brittany says she might have gone a little overboard planning, but wants it perfect. We see a clip of her telling Jax that she wants to fairytale it up. She has a lot of family members coming in, and it’s the perfect time to show them how great she and Jax are doing. He can do no wrong in her mom and mamaw’s eyes, but she’s excited for Jax and her dad to talk. They used to fight a lot, and her family saw them fight. We flash back to some of that, and her dad’s concern, saying he’s not 100% on board. Brittany says they had a hard time for a while, and she wants her dad to see how good they’re doing now. Jax thinks for the most part, they’re good. Brittany says he still gets defensive, and says things are her fault, like if he can’t find his keys. Lindsey asks if Jax thinks that’s her fault, and he says, no. He just needs someone to yell at. I have no words, except at least he put it out there. Lindsey asks how he thinks that makes Brittany feel. Part of couple’s therapy is about slowing down and developing empathy. He says they’re going down the right path, but Brittany says she still doesn’t trust him a little bit. Like if he’s late, she’s wondering where he is. Lindsey says that’s part of the sadness; she’s being real. Jax says it’s the first he’s hearing it. Lindsey asks if it’s hard hearing it, and Brittany says she doesn’t want any what if?s once they’re married. In her interview, she says, every now and then, she sees glimpses of Jax’s old behavior; like him talking over her, or being disrespectful. Lindsey says, any time it happens, they have to be totally transparent. Jax says it’s made them stronger, and made Brittany stronger. She doesn’t let anyone bully her or push her around. Brittany agrees that’s true. In Jax’s interview, he doesn’t advocate anyone cheat to make their partner stronger, but that was some good that came out of it. Jax says Brittany tends to give everyone a chance.
Schwartz calls his banker, and says he needs $50K. She says she’ll put in a request. In his interview, he says he’s always wanted to be the dude with the suitcase filled with cash. He wants to show Lisa that he’s a man of action. We flash back to Lisa calling him a p*ssy, then to her telling him the check bounced. He has the banker double-check that he has enough. He feels like a gangster with a heart of gold.
Ariana and Kristen go out. Kristen says she’s courting Ariana, and Ariana says Kristen had to ask her dad permission. We see a clip of Kristen knocking on Tom and Ariana’s door. Tom asks who it is, and she says she’s the ghost of his apartment’s past, which is pretty clever. Tom shows her what changes he’s made. They sit on the couch, and Kristen feels like she’s sitting with Ariana’s dad. Ariana is finally ready, and Tom tells them, keep it PG. Ariana tells Kristen not to be a downer, but her dad died five years ago tonight. In her interview, Ariana says this was also when Kristen said Ariana was having an affair with Tom. It was like WWII. Kristen says she was a d*ck that day. In her interview, Kristen says she remembers saying she knew Tom was Ariana’s friend, but he was her boyfriend, and he left to be with her. That summer, she wasn’t thinking about Ariana’s feelings, and that her father passed away. She tells Ariana that she wishes it could be erased. Ariana says it all worked out, and Kristen says, the bottom line is that Tom and Ariana are better together than she and Tom ever were.
Lala sets up at her venue, Sweet! Hollywood. Katie joins her, and Lala says she has record labels coming in, but she’s trying to forget that. Ariana, Kristen, and Jax come in, and Jax says he’s here to celebrate. He finally had a solid poop. Thanks for oversharing. Peter brings in roses from Lisa, who couldn’t be there. The guys question Adam about being in the friend zone, yet still having sex. Jax says, that’s hardto do, but he’s doing it. Lala comes out.
In Lala’s interview, she says. this show is important. She’s releasing a song she wrote for her dad. Unfortunately, her dad never saw her perform. She starts to get choked up, and says, so this is special moment for her. She wants her dad to know that she’s grateful for the woman he raised. She wouldn’t be this person without him. Lala performs two songs. Afterward, Stassi says she was so intense; she was so in it. Lala tells Stassi that she’s a beautiful human being, and if anyone says different, they don’t know who she is. Stassi asks if someone’s been talking about her, and then laughs. Lala asks where Stassi and Beau are, and Stassi says she feels like an a-hole. Alcohol fuels it, and here she is drinking. It brings out the demons she already has; the feelings from the past. Alcohol makes her say, screw it. In her interview, Stassi says, for the first time, she doesn’t know what to do. She’s terrified by her own behavior. Beau is not replaceable. Lala says when Stassi freaks out, she has her back.
Tom asks Ariana how drinks went with Kristen. She says Kristen remembered where she was five years ago and felt badly about it. Tom says it’s going to sound bad, but at that point, he felt he was going through it with her in a sense. Even back then, she meant a lot to him. She says he was always a good friend, and he hugs her. In his interview, he says they were just friends, but he cared deeply about her, and had to be there. He knows what that means now, but maybe not at the time. Ariana says it’s been a great day.
Raquel asks if Graham is excited to see his friends. Graham doesn’t answer because he’s a dog. She tells James that they’re playing pin-the-tail-on-the-puppy, and some kind of poopy toss game. He hopes not with real poopies. In Raquel’s interview, she says, having a puppy is like having a baby. It’s a big commitment, and you have to teach it everything. They discover a real poopy in the hallway, but don’t say whether they’ll be using it for a game. In her interview, Raquel says, it’s good practice for the babies James will have. We all go, what? and she says, she meant her and James. Freudian slip? Tom, Ariana, Peter, Scheana, and Adam represent. Raquel’s mom, Laura, helps with everything. In his interview, James says, she has no barrier. She says what’s on her mind, and he’s like the embarrassed son. Laura tells Peter how handsome he is, and touches his chest.
Raquel explains the first game, saying, you chug rosé while blindfolded, spin around, and pin the tail on the puppy. It’s a cute puppy. Giving Raquel props for painting it. Ariana thinks the party is 98% Raquel and 2% James. In his interview, a producer asks James why the puppy shower is important, and he says, it was Raquel’s idea. He’s just going along, but he loves it. Ariana ends up having to wear the cone of shame, but it’s not clear why. Tom says it’s good James isn’t drinking. James says he didn’t drink at Billie’s brunch, and that’s probably why he didn’t take Lala’s bait, taking it to the next level. Tom asks where James sees himself. Does he see himself back at SUR? In James’s interview, he says he’s been fired and rehired several times at SUR, and has his foot back in the door. He tells Tom he doesn’t think his run there is over. Tom asks, what if it doesn’thappen? and James says he’d have to start a new life. Straight up (apparently, his new favorite phrase). Tom thinks you should always have back up. Raquel thanks everyone for coming, and says Graham is happy to have so many friends there. In her interview, Ariana thinks when people say how their pets feel, it means that’s how they feel. Well, yeah. You’re point?
Ariana doesn’t like bartending when she’s hung over, but here we are. Scheana gripes that she never sees Ariana any more because of living on the west side. Lala asks to talk to Scheana in private. She tells Scheana that she’s been counting how many times she’s been drinking, and thinks she has a for real problem. Her anxiety attack in Mexico was 100% driven by alcohol. She can’t mess with alcohol, and it needs to be a lifestyle. In Lala’s interview, she says she’s been feeling emotionally confused. She tells Scheana that she’s angry, sad, and happy. It’s a lot, and her heart is so broken. In her interview, she says that after her father’s death, she was drinking every day. She takes a break, then falls back, and starts breaking down again. Scheana says she thinks it’s become an issue, but she’s handling it by making the difficult decision to never have a drink. Lala adds that she’s on her period, and Scheana says, at least that means there’s no baby. Lala tells her, good point.
Katie drives Schwartz to the bank, since he gets skittish in the rain. Katie says he should handcuff the money to himself. He’s lost his ID a million times. In his interview, he in his fantasy, he hands off the briefcase, Lisa opens it, and says, well done, Schwartzy. Then he has sex with an Eastern European woman who’s trying kill him. He asks Katie if she’s coming to watch, but she says she’s taking Stassi to see a real oracle. She’s a bonafide witch, who’s studied with shamans. Katie thinks it could be a method of therapy for Stassi. In her interview, she says, Stassi could use some magic. She tells Schwartz that he’ll be fine, but he’s nervous. He wonders, what if gets mugged? What if the bank teller sends the information to someone else, and he gets abducted or killed? While he’s in the bank, Katie calls Stassi, and tells her they’re all set. She asks if Stassi is excited, and Stassi says, no; scared, but she wants to be exorcised. Schwartz comes back with a tote bag full of cash. He feels 17% sexier, and asks if she wants to pull over and have sex. She says, not particularly.
Tom brings Ariana to TomTom in the sidecar. Inside, he tells her it’s the quiet before the storm. Schwartz comes in with briefcase handcuffed to his wrist. Tom asks if he’s effing kidding. Schwartz says, people get killed for way less, and Tom tells him to shush. In his interview, Schwartz says when every time he visualized the scene, he was a different James Bond, A man of few words, sexy, debonair. Hello, Vanderpussy. I’ve got your money. Schwartz meets Ken and Lisa in the back. Giggy! He says he’s had a stressful day, and Lisa tells him, welcome to her world. He has something for her. He uncuffs the briefcase, and says he wants to show her that he’s serious. He opens the case, and they laugh. Lisa asks what he had to sell to get it, and he says, his body. She asks, how many times? and he says, tenthousand. She asks why it’s in small bills, and he tells her visual impact. Ken takes pictures. Schwartz asks If it’s official, and Lisa says, it’s official, baby. In his interview, Schwartz says, the name is Schwartz; Tom Schwartz. And I like my shots halved, not whole. In Lisa’s interview, she says she’s proud of him. Ofcourse, it’s ridiculous. He drops the briefcase, and they gather up the packs. Lisa takes it to the safe.
Stassi is nervous. Oracle Amanda wants to do a quick clearing ceremony before Stassi comes in. Stassi stands in the doorway, holding her hands out, and closing her eyes. Amanda says, blah-blah-blah, boo! or something like that, scaring Stassi. In her interview, she says she loves the supernatural, and dabbling in it, but it’s normally more lighthearted. She feels like she walked into the Blair Witch house. Amanda, Stassi, and Katie sit in a circle. Stassi says she has issues with getting angry. She acts out, and it’s like she can’t control it. Katie says everyone becomes the bad guy. Stassi says she’s finally in a relationship with somebody wonderful, and she sees herself coming at him. She’s brought a photo, and gives it to Amanda, who sees lot of love between them. She says Stassi has to get the power under control. When she has angry outbursts, a demonic spirit is possessing her. In Stassi’s interview, she says, she’s not just mean; she’s demonic. Amanda says it’s possible the spirit is one she called in to protect her. She doesn’t need it anymore, and has to transform the spirit that’s causing suffering. She tells Stassi to call up an image of the demon. Think of the times she lashes out. We flash back to the times she’s gotten on Beau’s case. Amanda tells her to say out loud what it feels like. Stassi says, it’s hot and dark, like a heavy cloud. Amanda wants her to tell the spirit how she feels, and Stassi says, she feels angry. Amanda says, tell it what she wants it to do. Stassi wants it to leave, and Amanda does some chanting, and waves her arms around. In her interview, Stassi says she feels hopeful and helpless at the same time. It’s the most draining experience of her entire life. Amanda says, the circle has been cast, and asks what Stassi sees. Stassi says, it seems younger and lighter. A cloud on the best day. Like a Mario brothers cloud. Amanda tells her to feel it melting with her body, and tinkles some chimes. She asks Stassi to come back in the space. It was a turning point. Her wound has healed, and now Stassi can become the most magnificent badass version of herself. She asks what Stassi learned, and Stassi says, her trying to be powerful and in control, doesn’t serve her loved ones or herself. She doesn’t need be in control. It will be fine. In her interview, Stassi says, admitting you have demons is the first part in being better. She’s just begun the hard part. Katie says it shows Stassi is a worthy, beautiful person, and she’s proud of her.
Next time, Brittany’s family arrives, Scheana goes on a date with someone other than Adam, Lisa tells James not to be a two year old, and Brittany reveals her dress. Jax also tells Brittany’s father that he’ll always make himself number one, but I’m guessing that editing is involved. Even Jax can’t be that stupid. Can he?
Sansa: What do dragons eat anyway? Daenerys: Whatever they want.
So after a two-year (!) break, we finally got a new episode of Game of Thrones. Nothing phenomenal happened, but that’s not surprising for the first episode of a season. They’re going to have to work up to topping a White Walker dragon and the Wall falling. The main points were that Samwell told Jon who he really is and at the end Bran saw Jaime come into town, and their eyes met. My favorite moment though, was Jon getting his first ride on a dragon. It was both exciting and funny, and like every childhood dream. A little rougher than riding on Falcor of The Neverending Story though. For a more detailed recap…
I’ve never played video games much, because I was always too afraid I’d be one of those people who gets sucked in, plays 24/7, and ends up in rehab. So if, like me, you had no idea what a Super Mario Brothers cloud looked like, here you go.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Spencer says, at last the board meeting is over, and Laura says, her sentiments exactly. He says she should have let him stay home, but she was concerned about him booking more travel. He says, think of the frequent flyer miles. You’re welcome. He tells her that he’s trying to find Lucy or Epiphany. He has some ideas for the Nurses’ Ball.
Finn is trying to find the right words, and all he comes back to is how great he feels when he’s with her. That’s not entirely romantic, but he was sleepwalking, and she came along and blackmailed him into working with her. That’s still not romantic, but what he’s trying to say is, he doesn’t want to go back to sleep and wake up without her by his side. Will she marry him? We see he’s talking to a teaching skeleton in the hospital. He says, better or worse than the last one? Yeah that’s what he thought. The skeleton is no more help than Roxie. Laura watches through the window, and smiles.
Anna pours tea, and Robert asks why she’s being domestic. She says now that things have calmed down, they can relax and catch up. Robert doesn’t think they’re the catch up types. There’s nothing else to bring him there? She says, nothing.
Sasha joins Peter and Maxie at Charlie’s. She says they don’t have to take her to lunch, but Maxie says, after running the DNA test, lunch is the least they can do. Peter says they want a chance to make it right.
Curtis goes to Nina’s office, and she asks how Jordan is. Curtis says, Jordan is Jordan, but that brings him to why he’s there. Nina said she’d use her publishing platform to reach out for a kidney donor. How’s that going?
At the courthouse, Jordan tells Margaux, if they pressure the Canadian authorities they might still press on with the Ryan Chamberlain case. Margaux says there’s no reason to ask for favors or allocate resources. Chamberlain is dead. Case closed. Move on. She leaves, and Ava says, just like that, the search for the man who murdered her daughter is finished.
Nora comes in wearing sunglasses, and sipping coffee. Doc says, late night? and she says her son got engaged. His fiancé, Destiny, throws a great party. Doc asks if she has any idea why they were summoned. The jury selection isn’t for two weeks. She says she requested it. If all goes well, there won’t be a trial.
Laura knocks on Finn’s door, and he asks to what he owes the pleasure? She wants to consult his medical expertise, and asks if he thinks Ryan could have survived.
Spencer tells the vending machine that it’s a useless piece of junk. He should sue. Valentin says, allow him, and bangs on it. Spencer’s selection drops down. Valentin says Charlotte told him that Spencer was in Port Charles, and he was wondering if they’d run into each other. He asks why Spencer is at the hospital, and Spencer says he’s waiting for his grandmother. Valentin asks how she is, and Spencer says, fine; he’s taking care of her. Valentin is sure that brings her comfort. Spencer asks if Nina has finally realized that he and Sasha are up to something.
Sasha tells Maxie and Peter that Valentin really seems to love Nina. She doesn’t think he’d do anything to hurt her. Peter says she’s right, to a point. He would definitely manipulate circumstances to his advantage, and they thought he was doing it with her. Maxie says, in doubting him, they called Sasha’s integrity into question. She really means herself; she’s the one who wanted to snoop. She’s sorry. Sasha says Maxie barely knows her, and it’s clear how much Nina means to her. Maxie hopes Nina feels that way eventually. She’s barely speaking to Maxie.
Nina tells Curtis that they did appeal to their readers. They got a lot of responses, not the right candidates. Curtis suspected as much. Donating a kidney is a big ask. Nina asks again how Jordan is doing, and he says she’s doing her thing; working around appointments. Nina says patients can be on dialysis for a long time, but he says dialysis doesn’t lend itself to Jordan’s career. She’s going to need a kidney sooner than later. Nina says she’ll put something else out. She takes his hand, and says they don’t need a lot of responses. They just need the right match. He says, on another note, he’s taking on more work. It helps with the income and keeps him from hovering. He asks if Nina has any assignments, but she says, not lately. She’s been dealing with an investigation she doesn’t want. He asks, what? but she says, forget it. It’s not going to happen. Peter and Maxie spent the last month trying to prove Sasha isn’t her daughter.
Doc asks Nora if a trial Isn’t inevitable, but she says she found an interesting precedent. There’s no way they can find him guilty. He says, but he is. She says, guilt and responsibility are two different concepts. One gets you therapy time, and the other gets you prison time. Let her do her job. Margaux comes in, and asks, what’s going on? Nora is glad she could make it on short notice. Judge Chua comes in, and says she understands there’s a motion Nora would like to file. Nora requests that all charges be dropped against her client.
Jordan tells Ava, the US and Canadian authorities are satisfied that Ryan is dead. Ava says, theyrecovered his hand. So what? If it was up to Jordan, would she call it off? Does she believe Ryan is dead? Jordan says her opinion doesn’t carry any weight, but Ava says it does with her. She’d like to hear it before… Jordan says, before what? Ava says, it doesn’t matter. Jordan says she has no resources at her disposal, but Ava does, doesn’t she?
Laura tells Finn that the forensic report says Ryan was alive when his hand was severed, and it was a clean cut. They claim the separation was possibly done by a propeller blade. He says it’s not his area of expertise, but Laura says he’s an excellent doctor, and she respects him. What is the likelihood that Ryan survived?
Robert and Anna laugh over old times. He says he did impress himself. Anna says it’s like when Sean put them together. Robert was flying by the seat of his pants, and she didn’t know what she was doing. He says, but they got it right; better than right. She says it’s murky for her. She’d like to hear his memories, any detail. Robert says, now they get to the real reason for the trip down Memory Lane. What’s goingon? She says she’s just feeling the subject. He says, back in the day, he couldn’t tell when she was lying. Now he can read her like a book. She’s terrified; why? She says, what if it wasn’t her on the first mission? What if it was Alex, and she’s really Robin’s mother?
Margaux says it’s a matter of record that Doc admitted Ryan to Ferncliff under an assumed name. They have the records, as well as his statement. He deliberately concealed Ryan from the authorities. This is no more than a stall tactic. Nora says, if the DA would let her continue, she’ll demonstrate her request is based on sound reason and precedent. Judge Chua finds sound reasoning impressive, as well as respect for the court’s valuable time. She tells Nora to briefly outline her request. Nora says her client is charged with aiding, abetting, and obstructing justice by harboring a fugitive. His actions are irrelevant. Ryan wasn’t a fugitive at that time. He was a dead man.
Jordan tells Ava that her son was Kiki’s friend. If the department gets the slightest hint that Ryan survived, she’ll get the case moving again. Ava says she can’t sit and wait while Ryan chooses his next victim. Jordan asks what she intends to do.
Finn tells Laura, if the hand was cleanly severed, it improves the chance of survival, but blood loss plus time equals death, unless there was medical attention. Laura says, what if he did get medical attention? Finn says if the proper tourniquet was applied, it would cut off the blood loss. It the wound was cauterized or sealed, it’s possible he survived. She thanks him. He’s sorry he didn’t have a more definitive answer. He’s curious. Wouldn’t she prefer him dead? She says, it would be a lot easier on a lot of people, but it doesn’t look like it’s going to be that simple. She hopes she’s not overstepping, but she noticed he’s about to ask someone a big important question. He says she saw? She says, just a little. He’s sorry she had to witness that, but now that she did, perhaps he could ask her opinion as a discerning woman. He shows her the ring, and asks what her take is on it. She says, wow; she’s going to love it. He’s got this. She tells him, good luck, but she’s sure he won’t need it. He thanks her.
Robert says Anna is Robin’s mother and he’s her father. He’s always known that. She says, what if he’s wrong? What if it’s not her memory? He said the memory had to be significant. Robert says she’s had a lot of significant memories, but she says, what if this the one? He says he was there. They were trapped on an island, roped into a wedding ceremony, and nine months later, Robin turned up. She’s Anna’s daughter. She says, prove it. He doesn’t respond, and she says, he can’t. No one can.
Valentin isn’t sure what Spencer is implying, but Sasha is a welcome addition to the family. Spencer says he and Sasha are in cahoots about something. Maybe he should tell Charlotte. Then she’ll have to admit her poppa is a liar and a thief. He says Charlotte was concerned when Spencer told her that he’d rigged the election. She didn’t know what to do, so she told him. He told her not to worry; the truth always comes out in the end. Spencer says he never admitted anything to Charlotte, but Valentin says one concerned call to the election board, and they’ll know a machine was tampered with that Spencer had access to. He asks if Spencer knows the penalty for election fraud. His being a minor will have no bearing on the punishment. He needs to think about that before he throws threats around.
Anna says she and Alex are Identical twins. There’s no DNA that can prove which one of them is Robin’s mother. Robert insists she is, and she says that’s what he wants to believe. He asks if she doesn’t think he’d know the difference between her and Alex. She says, now, yes, but they were strangers then. It was their first assignment. He had nothing to compare her behavior to. It could have been Alex all that time. He says if he wasn’t watching her unravel, he’d be insulted. She say she’s worked it out. Alex could have been impersonating her, and gotten pregnant. She had the baby in secret, and realized she couldn’t handle a child. Cabot proposed the mind study, and Alex had those memories transferred to Anna, who believed she had Robin, and raised her as her daughter. But what if she’s not?
Nina tells Curtis the third test proved again that Sasha was her daughter. He wonders what made Maxie and Peter think otherwise. She says they don’t trust Valentin. She sees that Maxie hasn’t given her a layout, and says Maxie should be doing her job instead of playing detective. It’s convoluted. They think there’s some deal between Valentin and Obrecht.
Nina calls Maxie, and asks where the layout for the May issue is. Maxie thought she had a few more days, and says, it’s a little rough. Nina says, no excuses. Get it on her desk. Maxie says she needs to go. Nina moved up the deadline. She’s sorry to cut lunch short, and asks for a rain check.
Laura finds Spencer, and Valentin addresses her as Madam Mayor, saying he and Spencer were just talking about her. She says he’s not to approach Nikolas’s son. Is she making herself clear? He says, crystal. She says it’s still fortunate she ran into him. They need to create a visitation schedule for while Lulu is out of town. Valentin doesn’t think so.
Ava says she’s taken enough of Jordan’s time. Jordan says grief doesn’t allow her to break the law, and tells her not to jeopardize the integrity of the investigation. Ava says, there is no investigation. Ryan isdead. Case closed. She walks off, and Jordan makes a call to Julien. She says they need to have a conversation about his sister before she does something she’ll regret.
Margaux says Ryan clearly wasn’t dead when Doc was treating him. Nora says he was initially presumed dead for seven years, and then declared dead in absentia. Legally speaking, the state recognized him as deceased, and no longer a fugitive. Her client broke no laws. Margaux says in the case she’s referring to, the defendant was brought up on fraud charges for faking a death. Nora says that was a civil issue, not federal, and based on an insurance payout. Doc didn’t defraud anyone. She has another precedent from a case being tried now. Margaux says she’s doing this so Doc can evade prosecution. He worked to conceal Ryan from the authorities, and because of his actions, a violent psychotic was free to kill people. It was his moral obligation to let the authorities know. Nora says, moral perhaps, but the court is not in the business of legislating morality.
Ana says Robin has been the one constant in her life. The thought of her not being Robin’s mother, and not being Emma’s grandmother… Robert can’t imagine a greater loss. Greater than twenty years in Steinmaur or facing a firing squad. She’s punishing herself. Nothing else is going on. She says if he doesn’t want to help her, he can leave. He says, no. She started it, and they’re finishing. She never forgave herself for being a double-agent. The WSB closed the files, but didn’t punish her, so she’s deciding to punish herself. Don’t punish the rest of them. Don’t rewrite history and trash the greatest thing that’s ever happened to him.
Nina tells Maxie that she’ll look at it. Maxie doesn’t leave, and she asks if Maxie wants a cookie. She’s doing her job; that’s all. Maxie says she knows how much she screwed up. She was just trying to protect Nina. Nina says Maxie set out to prove her fiancé and daughter were conspiring to deceive her. If it was the truth, it would destroy her. She tells Maxie to go, but Sasha walks in, and tells her to wait. Nina owes it to herself to hear Maxie out.
Valentin tells Laura that she’s not Charlottes legal guardian, and she’s not on the custody agreement. Lulu is out of town, and made no provision for that. Her wishes are meaningless if there’s no court order. She made no arrangements, which gives him full custody. Laura says he’s taking advantage of that, but he says he wants things to be amicable. If Charlotte wants to see her, and it doesn’t conflict with any of their schedules, it’s fine. He asks if Spencer is staying with her. Considering his and Charlotte’s checkered history, it might get awkward. He tells her to think about it. She might find they agree on this matter.
Nora says Ryan was declared dead. It’s legally impossible to aid and abet a dead man. There was no crime, and the case can’t stand. Judge Chua is ready to rule. She says Doc sheltered his brother, known to be a violent psychotic, from the proper authorities. It was a severe lapse in judgement, and his actions contributed to three murders and a near fatal attack, carried out by his brother. Nora is correct though. There’s no clear legal precedent to continue. She’s ruling that the charges be dropped.
Robert is going to say it as many times as Anna needs to hear it. She’s Robin’s mother, and he’s Robin’s father. She says that doesn’t make it true. He says she’s going down a rabbit hole of her own making, created from three parts guilt and one part paranoia. Finn comes in, and asks, what’s going on? Anna says she told him. Robert says, he wasn’t there; he didn’t live it. She’s chasing shadows. Finn agrees, but thinks it has nothing to do with Alex or the memory transfer. It has to do with Anna’s past. Robert says, he wasn’t there. Stay out of it.
Nina appreciates Sasha’s input, but it doesn’t concern her. Sasha says, it does. When she and Nina first met, they didn’t hit it off. Sasha wouldn’t even let her in, but then they started to bond. She felt jealous of Nina’s relationship with Maxie at first. They were already family, and she was missing that. Family is family, no matter how they’re formed. Families are messy. People make mistakes, and cross boundaries. The trick is to remember that love forgives and keeps us together. She says us because Maxie is her family too, and Sasha forgives her. Maxie appreciates that, and starts to leave, Nina says, wait.
Peter sees Valentin outside Charlie’s. Valentin asks if he wants a hair sample. Peter says he owes Valentin an apology for doubting his intentions. Valentin says, he’s not a saint, but he’d never hurt Nina. Peter says, not intentionally, but actions have unintended consequences. Valentin asks if Peter was sincere in saying he’d be his best man, or if it was part of his strategy. Peter says, a little of both. He has a good idea of how far Valentin would go to make Nina happy, and this was definitely in his wheelhouse. It turns out Valentin was vindicated, and he’s glad. He wants to see them happy. Valentin’s phone rings, and he says he’s got business to attend to.
Margaux says she intends to appeal. The judge says that’s her prerogative, but her advice is for Margaux to consider the potential drain on her resources in prosecuting a defendant that poses no danger to society. Even if she secures a conviction, it won’t bring back the victims. She’ll just be pursuing a headline; a slippery slope she’s gone down before. The judge dismisses the court. On her way out, Margaux says, this isn’t over. Doc asks Nora, what just happened? and she says she saved his butt. He says what about the appeal? and she says he heard the judge. When Margaux realizes she’ll just further embarrass her office, she’ll drop it. He says, three people are dead, and all he gets is a stern talking to. She says she can’t help him wrestle with his conscience. Her job was to get him exonerated. If he wants to pay his debt to society, there are all manners of charities who would welcome an experienced psychologist. At least wife got her bail money back. He agrees, there’s that.
Anna can’t live with the uncertainty hanging over her head. She needs to know if Robin is her biological daughter. She can retrace her steps or find documents to uncover the truth; whatever it is. Robert says she can do it without him. He knows the truth, and he’s not standing there watching her torment herself. He tells Finn that he’s in for it.
Nora phones Bo. She says she’s done with the case, and will be home around eight. How about celebrating by ordering in burgers from Roadie’s? (Aw, nice nod to OLTL.) She starts to leave the courtroom, and sees Valentin. He says, fancy seeing her there.
Nina and Maxie hug. Maxie is sorry she went behind Nina’s back. Nina understands, but asks her to be up front in the future. Maxie says, deal. She says Sasha stuck her neck out for her, but she’s not sure why. Sasha says, sometimes, even with the best intentions, you dig a hole, and before you know it, you’re in too deep to climb out. If she was in Maxie’s position, she would want Nina’s forgiveness.
Spencer tells Laura that he and Charlotte have a mutual appreciation for her, but they differ on other subjects; like her loathsome poppa. Doc comes out, and Laura tells Spencer to go find Epiphany. Doc tells her that he’s there to file and appeal to the hospital board. The charges were dropped. She says, fantastic. He says it seems he can’t be guilty if said fugitive is already declared dead. She says, on the subject of Ryan, she heard his hand was recovered. She spoke to Finn, and he thinks it’s possible he could be alive. Doc wishes he could say for certain Ryan is gone, but he just can’t. She knows a couple of people who agree. He says, what about her? She tells him, the Canadian authorities seem convinced he’s dead, so she guesses they have to wait. In the meantime, good luck with his appeal. She can’t a part of it, since she can’t be objective, but if she did have a say, she’d vote for him to stay at GH. He thanks her, and says, it means a lot.
At Charlie’s, Ava orders a vodka martini, very dirty with three olives. She says, scratch that, and orders coffee to go. Someone watches her through the window. She says Julian has been telling her to cut back. In this case, he’s right. She needs her wits about her. Outside, someone ducks away as she comes out.
Next Spencer tells Nina that her knight in shining armor is blackmailing him, Valentin needs Nora’s services again, and Jason is working an angle to take Shiloh down.
Other people’s definitions of you, sometimes they’re more about making themselves feel better. You gotta define yourself. – Christopher Moltisanti
It’s the wrong way to meet your neighbors. – Good Samaritan who helped a victim in the shooting spree of an Uber driver in Kalamazoo
They’re all going on forty. – Chef Tracey Bloom, referring to Kim Zolciak’s daughters, Don’t Be Tardy
I believe that the greatest gift you can give your family and the world is a healthy you. – Joyce Meyer
Adventure is worthwhile in itself. – Amelia Earhart
A woman should be two things: who and what she wants. – Coco Chanel
It’s the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen. – John Wooden
If the person you are talking to doesn’t appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear. – Winnie the Pooh, A.A. Milne
These creatures don’t deserve our protection; they deserve our absence. – Sir Benjamin (JamesCromwell), Jurassic World; The Lost Kingdom
Every time someone’s driving somebody I lose. – Spike Lee, after losing the Oscar to Green Book. He had previously lost to Driving Miss Daisy.
💸 It’s That Time Again…
The weekend and taxes. Somehow, it just doesn’t go together. I don’t even know if Santeria can help me, but the song makes me feel better.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Alexis calls Sonny from Charlie’s. She asks where Kristina is, and when can she see her? Sonny says, she’s safe. When Jason got her, she was still knocked out by whatever they gave her. Alexis says, so much for DOD being the only people she can trust. Sonny hopes Kristina sees it that way. Alexis tells him to keep her posted. Julian comes by, and asks if she’s okay. She says she’s had better days. There’s a lot at stake. He asks if she’s referring to Kristina. She just bailed on work.
Jason looks at the text he just sent from Kristina’s phone. She wakes up, and he tells her, everything is okay. She’s fine. She asks, what happened? He says she was in a bad place, and he took her out.
Still in bed, Chase sees Willow’s tattoo. She says it doesn’t bother her anymore, but he says it bothers him. It’s like Shiloh branded her. She used to look at it that way, but now it’s just a tattoo. She’s free. They kiss. He asks if she knows what he wishes, and she says, that he could kiss it and make it better? He says, something like that, and she says he’s welcome to try.
Harmony asks Shiloh if he’s heard from Kristina. He says she hasn’t called, and his calls are going to voicemail. He has Daisy out looking for her. Harmony says maybe Kristina isn’t as devoted as he thought, but he insists, she is. He made sure of that. Sam walks in, and says she’s kind of embarrassed about last night. Shiloh says she had a moment, and moved through it. Instead of calling Jason, she reached out to him. Harmony asks if she’s spoken to Kristina this morning.
At the hospital, Sonny asks Josslyn how Oscar is doing. She says she and Carly are waiting for him to wake up. Sonny asks her to get something to eat for Carly at the cafeteria, and for herself. She needs to gain strength. When she’s gone, he asks Carly if there’s been an update in Oscar’s prognosis. Carly says he’s been taken off the ventilator. He can breathe on his own, but they don’t know if he’ll ever wake up.
Terry tells Drew and Kim, all they can do is keep Oscar comfortable and wait. The machine dings, and Kim asks if Oscar can hear her. He says, hi, and Terry tells him that they took the tube out, and it will be a while before his voice comes back. Don’t worry. Drew says Josslyn is outside, and asks if he should get her. Terry says she’d like a minute alone with Oscar. She wants to examine him, and run some simple tests without any distractions, happy though they may be. Kim tells Oscar that she loves him, and kisses his forehead.
Josslyn gives Carly a smoothie, and asks if there’s any chance she can see Oscar. Drew says, a pretty big one; he’s awake. Kim adds that he’s breathing on his own. Drew tells her about the tube, and says he can’t speak, but the good news is, he can’t cut her off. Josslyn says she’ll take full advantage of that. Drew tells her that she can’t go in just yet. Terry is running some tests. Kim leaves to call Julian, and Sonny says he’s going; they’re in his prayers. Carly says she’ll keep him posted. Josslyn tells Carly, it’s notover yet. She gets to see and talk to him again, and he can talk to her. Carly hugs her.
Willow asks Chase if it’s okay that she spent the night. She’s not sure about the etiquette. This is her first relationship. She asks if it’s too soon to call it that, but Chase says he definitely considers it a relationship. He’s happy she spent the night, and hopes there are many more. She says her too, and they kiss.
Julian tells Alexis that Oscar is finally awake, and he’s going to head over there. Molly comes in, and says she’s glad Alexis is there. Alexis is surprised, considering the location. Molly says it’s Kristina’s shift, and she was hoping for a truce. At least maybe they can agree to disagree about DOD. Alexis says Julian told her that Kristina isn’t coming in. She didn’t say why. Molly asks if Alexis has seen her, but Alexis says, nope. Kristina has ghosted her too. She’d love stay and chat, but she has a meeting. She tells Molly not to worry. Her sister will show up.
Sam tells Harmony that she hasn’t heard from Kristina, but she wasn’t expecting to. She asks if something is wrong, but Shiloh thinks they just got their wires crossed; it happens sometimes. Harmony asks Sam how Kristina seemed yesterday, and Sam says, great; the best she’s seen Kristina in a long time. She seemed happy and at peace. Why? Shiloh says he does a check-in every morning, and she missed it. It’s a first. Sam laughs, and says Kristina isn’t known for following rules. Shiloh says she’s been reliable, and Sam says, everyone has an off day. She wouldn’t worry. She’s sure Kristina will turn up.
Jason gives Kristina some water. She asks, what is this place? and he says, it’s a property. She says, a safehouse? Why is she there? She says, omg. She was at DOD for her ceremony. He says, it never happened, and she asks what he did. He says he let himself in. She was in the attic, and he carried her out. She says he had no right. This is her choice. Shiloh honored her. Did Shiloh know he was there? He says, no, and she says Shiloh just thinks she ran off after he chose her. How could Jason do that to her?
Terry tells Drew and Kim that Oscar is sleeping; it’s normal. Josslyn wants to sit with him, but Drew says she needs to prepare herself. This last seizure took its toll. She tells him not to worry. She can handle anything. She leaves, and Terry says she believes her. Carly steps away to give them privacy, and Terry tells Drew and Kim that Monica asked to be included. They all leave to go somewhere more private.
Jason tells Kristina that she can’t leave. She asks if she’s a prisoner. He says Max and Milo are outside, and tells her to be mad at him, not them. He can’t let her go. She says he violated her rights, agency, and free will. He’s acting superior, and kidnapped her because he’s jealous of Shiloh. Sam sees the truth. Shiloh is enlightened, and he’s on a path to nowhere. He asks if she wants breakfast, and she says the only thing she wants is her freedom. He’s known her for her entire life. She thought he was the only person who would be fair to her. He says if it had been up to him, he would have taken her out weeks ago. She says he can’t do this; he has to let her go. He says she’s right about one thing. He’s known her for her entire life, and whenever possible, he’s kept her safe. Does she think he’d stop now? She scowls at him.
Michael comes by Chase’s apartment. Does no one call ahead? He was thinking about Willow told them regarding DOD. There has to be a way to close Shiloh down. Chase says he has to be careful. He can’t consider anything illegal. Michael wonders if they can’t come up with another sting. Willow comes out, wearing one of Chase’s T-Shirts. Michael says they can discuss it later, but Chase says he’s already there. They’ll think of an out-of-the-box way to trap Shiloh.
Sonny calls Jason, and asks if there were any problems. Jason says, no. Sam got Shiloh away, allowing him time to get Kristina’s phone. He found her in the attic, and carried her out. Sonny asks how he unlocked the phone, and Jason says Kristina gave him the password. She was pretty doped up. She didn’t realize what was happening. He texted Julian from her phone, and said she wasn’t coming in. Sonny says, so as far as Shiloh is concerned, she ran off on her own. He asks how she is now, and Jason says, understandably furious. Sonny walks into the safe house, and Kristina runs to him, crying. He says, it will be all right. She says she knows he thinks he’s trying help her, but he’s doing more harm than good. She thinks she’s better off at DOD. He has to take her back. She cries, and he holds her.
Terry tells Drew and Kim, the growth of the tumor has severely compromised Oscar’s mobility. His right side has been significantly weakened, and she’s concerned he’ll have trouble walking. Josslyn goes in to see Oscar. She takes his hand, and kisses it. Terry wants to make it clear; Oscar will not regain the ground he lost. In her experience, when this stage is reached, it progresses quickly. Oscar smiles, and thanks Josslyn. He says, sorry, and she says she forgives him – this time. Terry says, other than keeping Oscar comfortable, there’s nothing further they can do, medically speaking. Monica guesses it’s time to figure out what they’re going to do.
Monica says she’s made arrangements for Kim and Oscar to stay as long as they need to. They can come today. Kim thanks her, saying it’s generous. Monica says, it’s not generosity; it’s family. Drew says they’ll have to ask Oscar first, and Monica says, ofcourse (🍷); no pressure. He may want to stay in his own room, or go to Mount Kilimanjaro. Drew says, he told her? Monica says, Oscar’s wishes are paramount. Kim guesses the first thing they need to do is talk to Oscar about the end of his life, and ask where he wants to live the rest of his days.
A now-dressed Willow hates to say it again, What Shiloh is doing is wrong, but he doesn’t break any laws. Michael says they need a new angle. What about the money? Willow says, the people who give him money consider it an honor. The more they give, the deeper they move into his Trust. Michael says, it implies coercion. If Kristina stops paying, she’ll be expelled. It’s extortion. Chase says, good luck proving it in court. Michael says they might have no way in, but they have something – Willow.
Sam apologizes to Shiloh again. Last night, she was kind of a mess, but she thinks she made a tiny breakthrough. Shiloh says, it was a significant breakthrough. Molly comes in. She sees Sam, and asks if she’s there to check on Kristina. Shiloh says she must be Molly, and she says, he’s Shiloh. The guy who’s not running a cult. Her sister called in sick. Molly asks if Shiloh can send one of his minions to get her. He says she’s not there, and Molly says she lives there, doesn’t she? If she’s not at work, and not home, where is she? Sam says, she could be anywhere. There are a lot of other options. Molly asks if she’s not worried, and Sam says, not yet. Shiloh explains that Sam is one of his students, and Molly asks if she’s completely lost her mind.
Sonny tells Kristina that she knows he loves her, and because he loves her, he’s keeping her there. He’s keeping her safe, and she’s not going back. Kristina starts yelling, saying, he can’t do this; he has no right. He says he has every right to protect his daughter from a predator. Kristina says Shiloh understands her in a way he never could. Sonny says Shiloh is using her. She wants to talk to her mother. She knows about the law, and he’s breaking it. He says he’s broken worse. There’s a knock at the door. It’s Alexis. Sonny tells Kristina, go ahead. Talk.
Josslyn reads The Wind in the Willows out loud to Oscar, while Drew and Kim watch. Kim tells Josslyn that she’s an entertaining reader. Josslyn says, it helps having a captive audience. Drew asks for parent/son time, and Josslyn says she’ll be outside. Kim says Oscar must be tired. He is, but he doesn’t know why. All he’s been doing is sleeping. Kim tells him that they talked to Terry. The tumor is growing rapidly, which is why he’s not as strong on his right side after the last seizure. As time goes on, he’ll probably have more seizures like this. Oscar, says, okay. He guesses this means he’s finally in the home stretch. This is it. He’s really dying. Kim calls him beautiful boy, and cries, as she touches his face.
Kristina asks if Alexis went along with this. Alexis says it wasn’t her first choice. Kristina says she’s an adult. She’ll press charges, and get Alexis disbarred. Alexis says when she gets out, do that. It will be worth it. Kristina asks why they’re afraid of people who are kind, generous, and loving. Alexis says they behave falsely to lure in impressionable young people. Kristina suggests Alexis just call her stupid, but Alexis says she’s not stupid. There’s a knock at the door, and Kristina asks if everyone was invited to this kidnapping. Someone help her. Sonny opens the door, and Alexis says, Neil. Sonny says they know each other? Alexis says, you could say that. He’s her therapist.
Molly says Sam has fallen for this guy’s act. Sam says she’s investigated Shiloh, and while he has questionable things in his past, everything if legit. Molly tells Shiloh, he is good to get Sam to fall for his act. What it is, is a front. She read his book. It’s derivative, some of it is plagiarized, and the author is a textbook narcissist. Sam tells Shiloh, sorry, but Molly says don’t apologize for her. Good luck with her enlightenment. She walks out, and Sam follows her. She tells Molly to listen to her. Molly says, this place is a cult. They’re getting people to open up about their lives, and she wonders what they’re doing with the information. In the meantime, they’re taking money, and getting in between the followers and their families. Sam says nothing is going to get between her and Kristina. Molly says she’s not losing both sisters to Shiloh. She leaves, and Sam smiles.
Michael says Willow can meet Shiloh in public; she knows his tricks. She asks, then what? Record it? Shiloh is too smart to say anything incriminating. Chase says he’s seen the games Shiloh plays. He finds Shiloh manipulative, creepy, and unsettling – and he carries a weapon. He’ll help if they can come up with a decent plan that won’t put Willow near that guy. Michael says, what if she didn’t have to go near Shiloh?
Josslyn tells Carly that she can’t believe Oscar never read The Wind in the Willows when he was a kid. Carly says she didn’t either. Jax got it for Josslyn because his mom read it to him. Josslyn knows Oscar will love it; it’s an awesome book. Carly missed out. Monica approaches, saying Drew and Kim wanted them to have an update. The tumor is progressing. They’re going to keep Oscar as comfortable as possible, and hopefully he’ll have a few more alert days. Josslyn says, days. Monica says, the time is very short, and Josslyn asks if he’ll have to die there. Oscar probably won’t say anything, but it’s not what he wants. Monica says she doesn’t think so either. His parents are talking options as they speak. Carly thanks her. She leaves, and Josslyn says maybe they’ll have time to finish the book. She cries in Carly’s arms.
Michael thinks Kristina might listen if Willow talks to her alone. Willow says, members are taught that doubters are weak and less evolved. Michael says he’s done everything he can. Kristina needs to know the truth, and Willow might be the one person she’ll accept it from.
Kristina says, priceless. Her father accidentally hired her mother’s therapist to deprogram her from an imaginary cult. Nice to meet their accomplice in a federal crime. Alexis says Kristina doesn’t know everything. Neil tells Kristina that she can call him Neil, but she says she’s not doing that. He should cure her parents. They need his services more than she does. They’re keeping her here against her will. Neil says they think she’s in danger, but Kristina says they don’t want her to find peace. Neil says, all goodparents want that for their kids. Kristina doesn’t care what they want. DOD is her new family. Neil asks, how so? and Kristina says she’s not doing this. It’s wasting time. She walks out of the room. Alexis says, please tell her that Kristina isn’t going out the back door, and Sonny says, Max and Milo are outside. There’s no way to get out. Alexis says, so Neil is here, and Neil says, it looks that way. He thought she said it was a bad idea, and she says she did, but Sonny ignored her advice. What a surprise. Sonny asks, what happens next? Neil says this makes his work harder, but Sonny says if Kristina had left on her own, they wouldn’t need him. Neil says he usually works with people who have left on their own, and want to get better. If she returns to DOD, full of rage and betrayal, they’re not likely to see her again.
Carly wishes she could do something to make it easier. Josslyn says, it’s not supposed to be like this. But if loving Oscar means it’s going to hurt, bring it. It’s better than not loving him. Carly says she knows.
Drew tells Josslyn that Kim and Oscar are moving in with the Quartermaines to live as a family. Josslyn is welcome any time, all the time. She thanks him, and goes back in to see Oscar. Julian holds Kim. Drew sits with Monica, and she cries. Josslyn is glad Oscar is awake, and they can still talk. She was afraid she wouldn’t even get that. Oscar says, no way. She takes his hand, and says, one more question. What does he want to do with the rest of his life? She gets in the bed with him, and they cuddle.
Willow says she’d like to help. She can tell Kristina what she knows, but when Shiloh finds out – and he will… Michael says she’s afraid Shiloh will come after her. He understands, but there are two things he’d like her to consider; him and his father. He’s the CEO of ELQ, and has more connections and resources than Shiloh. He can protect her. His father is allegedly the most powerful crime boss, and controls the city. He has a long reach, and would do anything to protect the person who helps his daughter. He thanks her for considering it, and leaves. Chase tells her if she’s worried about provoking Shiloh, or that he might figure out she had his child, don’t do it. Michael is resourceful. He’ll find another way.
Shiloh throws his book across the room. Harmony runs in, and tells him, the cup is gone. She took it. If she shows it to the wrong people… Shiloh says, she’s loyal. Harmony hopes he’s right. If she didn’t take it, someone else did. It could be bad for them. He tells her, go find it. Just find it. And look for Kristina too. She’s too valuable for them to lose.
Jason looks at the cup with the tattoo symbol on it. Sam calls, and asks how Kristina is. He says, she’s pissed. Sonny and her mom are with her. She tells him Molly stopped by DOD, and she told her that she was taking classes there. She was looking for Kristina. Jason asks about Shiloh, and she says he asked about Kristina, but she acted casual. She thinks he believes Kristina left on her own. She told him that Kristina gets like this; she’s a flake. He seemed to buy it. Jason thinks it’s going to take a while to get Kristina to believe Shiloh is not a good guy.
Alexis can’t believe Neil is helping Sonny. Sonny says Kristina was already drugged, and was about to be tattooed and literally screwed. Neil tells them they can’t be arguing. If they need to, they should go outside and get it out of their systems. Kristina is going to work hard to manipulate them, and pit them against each other. They have to show a united front, no matter what throws at them.
Tomorrow, Valentin tells Spencer that the truth always comes out, Ava asks if Jordan thinks Ryan is dead, and Laura asks Finn if he thinks Ryan is dead.
🔎 I Spy…
GH alumni Brytni Sarpy (Valerie Spencer ) in a chip commercial.
✂ Tonight, on Project Runway, the challenge was the future of streetwear. What is that anyway? The same thing as the used vintage stuff I wore when I was in acting school? Kovid was out for a lack of cohesiveness, although I loved his vest with Steampunkish accents. He had also been in the bottom three about fifteen times, even though they were only on episode five. Oddly enough, the guy who’s cried his way through every episode, didn’t shed a tear.
🍵 Let Me Pour You Some Tea…
Despite a rougher year than most of us, Bethenny is looking good. And like Billy Crystal said as RicardoMontalbán (SNL), it is better to look good than to feel good.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
After skating, Willow and Chase go to this apartment. Willow asks if skating is going to be Chase’s new hobby. He doesn’t think so, but he loved it because he got to be with her. He tells her that he has something he hopes she’s into. He holds up a bottle, and says, behold. The most magical bottle of wine ever had. At least that’s what the guy at the wine store told him.
Finn says, it feels like May, but Anna is busy looking at her phone. He doesn’t mean to pry, but asks if there’s something about the picture Robin sent that’s concerning. She says she was just thinking about the people who are most precious to her, her daughter and grandchildren. It never occurred to her, what if they’re not…
Peter walks Maxie to her door, and says they have to plan their next date. She says that would imply they had one tonight. He asks if it doesn’t count, and she says only if he thought her spending most of the time with other people was a good date. In that case, they have a problem. He asks, what about tomorrow? and she says she’ll find a sitter. He says he’ll make a reservation. She asks is he staying or going? and he says, staying. She was hoping he’d say that.
On the phone in his office, Sonny tells Carly that he’ll be home soon, and he loves her too. He hears someone at the door, and grabs his gun. It’s Alexis, who says they have to talk. He says, Kristina? and she says, what else? She tells Sonny, he’s not going to kidnap her, and he says, whatever Shiloh is selling, Kristina is buying big time. She’s in deep, and they have to dig her out.
Kristina signs her pledge. Shiloh says, well done. She wants to make him proud by repaying him for everything he’s given her. He says she’s such a special person, and touches her face. He tells her, enjoy the ceremony. He leaves, but she calls him back. She doesn’t know… He says the ceremony will be as painless as possible. Does she trust him? She has nothing to be afraid of. She half-smiles.
Jason tells Sam that he wants to case the house first. Then he’ll grab Kristina, and get her the hell out of there. Sam says they have to make sure Shiloh is fully occupied somewhere else. Jason asks, how? She takes out her phone, and says, watch and learn.
Chase asks if Willow has been to the specialty wine store, but she says she’s too intimidated. He tells her that Stanley said – she interrupts, noting he’s on a first name basis with Stanley – the wine is from a little family-owned vineyard. He hesitates before quoting Stanley that it’s the vintage of love. She says, it must be some wine. They should toast. Chase asks, to what? and she says, to new adventures and magical vintages. They clink glasses.
Finn tells Anna that he doesn’t understand. She says, what if the unthinkable… He says, what? and she says, her sister. He says now she’s getting somewhere. She says what if she’s misinterpreted their relationship all these years? What if Alex despises her? Finn asks, why? Anna says what if she got to raise Alex’s child as her own? What if Robin is Alex’s, and not hers?
Peter remarks on how big James is getting, and Maxie can’t believe he’s going to be one. Peter says, itwas a year ago next month. She says, he remembers that night? and he says, it’s hard to forget. James made a dramatic entrance. Maxie says she can never repay him, but he says she did the hard work. She says she never could have done it if he hadn’t been there. He’s glad he was, and she says, her too.
Alexis tells Sonny that their daughter is in big trouble. He says he’ll handle it, and she asks if he’s going to take Kristina kicking and screaming. He’ll make it worse. He asks how much worse it can get. She’s already in so deep, he doesn’t recognize her. Alexis says she talked to someone experienced in cults. They said not to force her. Plant seeds of doubt, encourage and nurture them to grow, until she comes to her own decision and leaves. Sonny asks if she got the advice from a gardener, and she says, no, atherapist. She has a new one.
Shiloh tells Kristina that she won’t be alone. The other Trust members will be with her. She still wishes he would be there, but he says it’s a step she needs to take on her own. She needs to own this; embracethis. He’ll be there after to welcome her into the family, but in the meantime, Harmony will be with her. Harmony comes in, and holds out a cup. She tells Kristina, drink it. It will calm her nerves.
Finn asks if Anna thinks the memory was having Robin. Walk him through this. Anna say she couldn’t see Robin much when she was little. Finn says, Robert couldn’t know he had a kid. She says she was still an agent, and should have gone to jail for treason. She visited Robin as much as possible, as a friend. Robin called her love. She was thinking, what if Alex gave birth, and for her own convoluted reason, had the memory implanted in her?
Maxie asks if Peter wants a nightcap, but he thinks he’s okay. She says she doesn’t have much in the way of food, but they could order out. He tells her everything he needs is standing in front of him. She says. that’s easy. They kiss, gaze into each other’s eyes, and kiss some more. Maxie starts unbuttoning his shirt, when James starts to cry. She can’t believe the timing, but Peter says he’ll be right there. He sits down, and sees a picture of Maxie and Nathan on the mantel.
Shiloh tells Kristina, time for reflection. She needs to make sure this is what she truly wants. She says she knows what she wants. If she seems anxious, it’s just because she’s excited, not scared. She doesn’t know why they can’t start now. Shiloh appreciates her enthusiasm, but tells her, for the sake of the others who come after her, use the time wisely and reflect. Harmony tells her, drink up, and she does. Shiloh arranges the pillows, and tells her to make herself comfortable. She lies down, and he says, think about how far she’s come. He’ll see her later. He and harmony leave. In the hallway, Shiloh tells Harmony, Kristina is clearly ready.
Sam calls Shiloh, who says it’s a nice surprise to hear from her. She hopes it’s not too late to call, but she doesn’t think she can make another session tomorrow. He says she seemed to enjoy the last one. Is she sure she’s okay. Isit Jason? She asks if she would sound unenlightened if she said yes, but he says she’d sound honest. She wants be with Jason, and doesn’t know if this can work. He asks where she is, and she says The Floating Rib, but he doesn’t have to come. He says he’s on his way. She hangs up, and tells Jason, and that is how it’s done. He says, yes it is. She needs to keep him at least a half hour. Can she do that? She says she needs him to get her sister out. Can he do that? He says he won’t leave the house without her.
At this point, my Word program suddenly decides it’s not responding. After waiting a beat to see if it will change it’s mind, I close it and reopen it. Since I don’t hit save every five seconds, only fifteen, it’s missing a paragraph. Since I haven’t slept this week, I decide it’s not worth it to hunt down the two minutes missing. Basically, Sam meets Shiloh outside The Floating Rib, and pretends to be somewhat drunk. He takes the beer bottle from her hand, and they go inside where he orders coffee.
Jason checks his phone; 10:10. He looks in the windows at DOD and sees the living room empty. He slips inside. He hears Harmony asking for help with Kristina’s ceremony. Shiloh pushed it up. it’s go time.
Chase tells Willow that he wants her, but only if she wants him. She says, yes. He asks if she’s sure, and she says she is. They get busy.
Finn thinks it’s crazy for Anna to work herself up for nothing. Robin is her daughter. Anna says she can’t say that with certainty. Look at Drew. Finn says, it’s not the same, but she says they were both parties to the experiment against their will. Drew had no idea his life was not his own, and could recall things that never happened. How does she know that’s not true for her too?
Peter looks at the picture of Maxie and Nathan. Maxie comes back, and says she thinks it was just a bad dream. One book and two songs made it all better. Peter thinks mom made all better. He says the picture makes him smile, and she says it has that effect on her too. She asks if it’s weird, talking about Nathan, when they just… He says, no, but he wasn’t married to him. Is it weird for her? She says, yes andno. She asks when life got so complicated, and he says, for him, at birth. She asks, what about his history? He’s sure she doesn’t want to talk about his father, and she says she means girls; particularly the ones he’s dated. He knows about her past, so it’s only fair she gets the 411 on his exes.
Sam tells Shiloh this place used to be called Jake’s. She and Jason played pool there all the time. She misses him. Shiloh asks if she misses who she was with him. She says, no, and he says, that’s a telling sign. She says give her enough time, and she can give him the bullet points on why they shouldn’t be together. He says it might serve as a reminder she’s on right path, and she asks how much time does he have?
Jason goes to attic, and finds Kristina. He asks if she can hear him. He sees the tattoo instruments, and says her name again.
Anna tells Finn, maybe Alex felt she couldn’t take care of Robin. Then Dr. Cabot did this deranged twin study, and Alex had the memories implanted in her. Finn says, that’s highly unlikely, and she says, but not impossible. Finn asks what the motivation would be. Alex hated her so much, she gave Anna her kid? Where’s the negative? Anna says Alex must have felt some relief. She couldn’t deal, and put the onus on her. Over the years, Anna got to love her and raise Robin as her daughter. Finn says Robin is her daughter. Anna says, now Alex is dropping hints. Finn asks, why now? and Anna says she doesn’t know. For some reason, Alex wants her to realize Robin is her daughter, and not Anna’s.
Peter hates to disappoint Maxie, but all of his relationships were relatively brief and uncomplicated. She asks if he’s ever been in love. He says no, but he’s looking forward to it. On that note, he thinks he should go. She asks, why? and he says he thinks it’s time to call it a night. She tells him James is a one and done kind of kid, but he says it’s not James. She asks, what then? and he says, her.
Chase and Willow bask in the afterglow. He asks if it was okay, and she says, more than okay. Perfect. He wants to make sure she’s all right. She says she had no idea it could feel like this, and the only reason she knows is because of him. They kiss.
Alexis tells Sonny that she’s worried his plan will make Kristina resent him. Sonny says, wrong. Kristina knows he’s the kind of person who takes action when things go bad. At the beginning, she might be mad, but she’ll realize. Alexis says he’s acting like she’ll be rational, and that’s not going to happen. He says, Kristina is still Kristina. She knows he’s not extreme unless the situation is that bad. She’ll realize she’s wrong. He asks if she thinks it’s better to wait and watch, but she doesn’t know. He says they’re getting her out of imminent danger and keeping her safe.
Sam says Shiloh has people who need and want him, including her sister. She can’t believe he has enough time to come out there and listen to her troubles. He tells her, DOD isn’t about one specific thing. Members have different purposes, and serve different roles. It’s up to her to decide what her role is. She asks if he’ll help her figure it out, and he says, of course. I know, let’s play a drinking game when anyone says, of course.
Jason checks Kristina’s pulse, and looks at the time. He picks Kristina up, and carries her out. I laugh because, even though I don’t think she’s that hefty, he struggles carrying her.
Finn tells Anna, let’s go home. It will make more sense in the morning. Anna says, it makes perfect sense now. This person she’s loved, and had the privilege of raising; who has her heart. What if Alex is trying to blow up her and Robin’s relationship? He says, what if it’s true? Would it change anything for her? She says, no. She loves Robin as if she was her own, and will until the day she dies, but how can she explain it to her? It will break her heart. She cries, and Finn holds her. I’m guessing this mom switch is where the storyline is going, but it seems like a sudden, huge leap to this conclusion. I also can’t figure out where Alex was dropping hints about it.
Maxie tells Peter that she wouldn’t have asked him to stay. Unless it’s him. He says there’s nothing he wants more. She doesn’t get it, and tells him, be honest. He says, of course, and I take a drink. He thinks maybe she’s trying to rush things; convincing herself she’s ready. if she is maybe tell tale sign not ready yet 100 okay m say she will be ready one day promise he’ll be waiting promise not like anyone else interested in she’s it take all the time she need he gives her a quick kiss and leaves she ponders looks at pic I’m disappointed
Alexis doesn’t like the idea, but tells Sonny, just get her out. He says, it’s happening tonight. Jason is getting her out now. She wonders why they were even discussing it, and he says she has to be on board. Kristina needs the both of them. She says, fantastic. Thanks for the update. Now she’s involved in a federal crime and could be disbarred. Sonny says if she doesn’t like what he does for a living, she shouldn’t have had a baby with him. She says, too late for that. He’s Kristina’s father; she’s her mother. He asks if she wants coffee, and she says, yes please. He tells her that he’s going to fix this.
Sam thanks Shiloh for listening to her, and he says, any time. She says she should probably get going. He offers to drive her home, since she can’t drive herself, but she says she can take an Uber. He’s already spent so much time helping her. He hopes he see her tomorrow, and he leaves.
Harmony says they’re ready to begin, but Kristina isn’t there. She looks around, puzzled, then panicked. She sends a text.
Shiloh’s phone dings. The text says, she’s gone.
Jason carries Kristina out. She starts to come to, and says, Jason? He tells her, it’s okay. He’s taking her somewhere safe.
Tomorrow, Michael says Kristina needs to know the truth, Jason tells Kristina that he took her from a bad place, and Terry says there’s nothing further they can do for Oscar.
The Real Housewives of New York City
We backtrack a little to the fish room argument. LuAnn says, Bethenny is coming tomorrow, but takes the nicest room.She gets to sleep with the swordfish. The other women laugh, and say she’s sleeping with the fishes. LuAnn gets up, and says, you take the fish room. She walks out, grumbling as she goes about being put in the effing fish room. In her interview, LuAnn is surprised they think it’s funny. She thought Dorinda would be more thoughtful. Since she was messed up last time, maybe put her in another room. We flash back to LuAnn’s hangover that weekend. Ramona asks if Bethenny is queen. She’s involved with someone else; how horrible can it be? Dorinda says, everyone handles grief differently. In Ramona’s interview, she wonders if Dorinda thinks Bethenny is in a bad place, so she gave her the room, or if she’s afraid of her. LuAnn asks the hotel guy for a room. At the table, the women agree it’s a scary room. They’re from NYC and think taxidermized fish are scary? Really? LuAnn comes back, and tells them, for her, it’s like the scene of the crime. She was wasted in that room. In her interview, Tinsley doesn’t think it’s a trigger. It’s just an excuse not to stay in the fish room. LuAnn says she’ll be staying at the hotel, but she’ll see them tomorrow. Sonja gets upset, and Ramona says she can’t do that. Dorinda says, let her dowhat she wants to do. Tinsley says she was originally supposed to be in that room, and offers LuAnn her room. In Dorinda’s interview, she says, LuAnn is quick to anger. She’s expected to hand over Bethenny’s room as a sign of loyalty to the crown. Tinsley says they all want to be together; she’ll take the room. LuAnn wants to keep the hotel room option open, just in case.
They go back to Bluestone Manor, and Ramona says, no more swordfish talk. Dorinda points out the head in the globe, aka the Grand Countess. LuAnn hopes that’s the only Countess losing her head this weekend. Tinsley unpacked already, and has to move her stuff, but she says, it’s not a big deal. Despite what needy Sonja has said, I think Tinsley probably makes a great guest. She’s only high maintenance with herself. In Sonja’s interview, she says, Dorinda is going out of her way, and it’s getting embarrassing. She wouldn’t do it. In Tinsley’s interview, she says, excuse me, Countess. I’ll just take my luggage. I’ll bow as I go out. She guesses they’re all serving LuAnn at this point. Tinsley says she isn’t in the fish room; Barbara is. In her interview, Dorinda says, she only has to do this for two days. Then she can explode in her cornfield. She tells the women, keep it down. The Countess is trying to sleep.
Yoga instructor Patrick arrives in the morning. He thinks the decorations are super cool. They transport him back to childhood. Dorinda says, that’s the idea. He sets up the mats. In her interview, LuAnn says yoga helps her breathe, be centered, get in touch with herself, and deal with life in general. Who knew that your mind doesn’t have to be occupied by when you can have your first drink in the morning? She gets downstairs first. Ramona and Sonja follow. Struggling, Sonja says this is why she doesn’t get on top anymore. In her interview, she says there have been more moans and groans in the class than she’s had in six months. Dorinda says LuAnn’s ass looks like two firm cherries. Forget LuAnn’s list. That’s the best selling point so far. Maybe I’ll take up yoga. In Dorinda’s interview, she says she’s having summer camp at Bluestone Manor, and she’s not even taking credit card payments. She tells everyone that they have to get going. Patrick says, namaste.
The ladies go to Ventfort Hall, an old Morgan estate. Dorinda thought Sonja would find it interesting. Sonja says it’s run down like her home too. Tour guide Richard greets them, and says, it’s a delight to have a relative. He gives a quick history. We find out that it was considered a cottage, and was built in 1983 by J.P. Morgan’s sister. He says, like the Roosevelts, there was a lot of intermarriage. In her interview, Sonja says, ancestry and history are important to the Morgans, since there are less of them astime goes on. In looking at this house, she’s worried about her townhouse. There’s history attached, and it’s banged up and beat up. She says the crest on the stained glass is like the one on her ring. Richard says she’s a proper Morgan then, and she says that’s what she’s been telling everyone. We flash back to the slipper incident, when Dorinda put Sonja down for wearing the Morgan crest. Richard shows them a room recreation, saying the couple slept in the same room, which was unusual for the time, but had twin beds. Sonja says she and her husband had their own rooms. She adds they’d still be together if things didn’t happen the way they did. In LuAnn’s interview, she says Sonja quickly reverted to Lady Morgan. There are some letters on a desk, and Ramona and Dorinda look through them. In her interview, Sonja says if everybody touches them, they eventually won’t make it. They should be under plexiglass. Truth! They will start to deteriorate over time from the oil and acid in people’s skin. In Ramona’s interview, she says when they first walked in, Sonja was fine. Now she’s in the Morgan zone, and she’s going to spiral down. Sonja says they don’t respect anything, and Ramona tells Dorinda that Sonja is going into the Morgan thing. She’s rambling, and Ramona is getting nervous. Dorinda goes to get Sonja, who’s still looking at things in the room. She tells Dorinda she has a similar trinket box. She’s trying to keep things for her kids. Dorinda says she has a fresh, new apartment, and Sonja says, it’s history. She needs to keep it for the kids. Ramona says, she’s lost in that world again. Dorinda says it’s not good. It’s not the way she wanted it to turn out. Sonja is still glad Dorinda brought her there.
The weather is beautiful, and Dorinda says for the first time, the women will understand why she loves Bluestone Manor. The pool is heated, and the weather is fantastic. Ramona says, the pool is delicious. Dorinda asks to talk to LuAnn. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s given the past year a lot of thought. She didn’t like what she or LuAnn said. She wants to discuss it, and get it behind them. She tells LuAnn that she wants to talk before Barbara gets there. She’s sorry for her behavior. She was hurt, but that’s no excuse, and it snowballed. She loves LuAnn like family. LuAnn misses that part of their relationship. Dorinda wants to go forward. It might not be now, but she wants peace. LuAnn appreciates her owning it. In LuAnn’s interview, she says it’s what she’s been waiting for, and it feels like there really is remorse. It finally feels like Dorinda is sincere. They hug. Dorinda says it’s time to be back where they used to be. She tells LuAnn to relax and enjoy the weekend.
Ramona asks LuAnn how it went, and if they’re in a better place. LuAnn says it was nice, and felt more real than anything they’ve said in six months. Ramona knows Dorinda missed their friendship. LuAnn tells Sonja it was heartfelt, so she can pull Barbara off of Dorinda. Sonja says Barbara meant nothing bad. She knows Barbara was coming from a good place.
Dorinda says the last time she saw Barbara, it was not great. In the spirit of good friendship and comradery, she’s invited her. Barbara marvels at the decorations on her way in. In her interview, she says she’s never seen decorations like this in her life. They’re over the top. It’s the perfect setting for a murder, and she hopes it’s not her. She tells Dorinda the house is huge, and asks how she cleans it. Dorinda says she doesn’t; she has people who do. Dorinda shows her around, and Barbara says it’s a gorgeous house. She wonders what the hell with the fish. It doesn’t exactly go. Dorinda says it’s a boy’s room. In her interview, Dorinda thinks Barbara is speaking like LuAnn’s puppet. She asks Barbara what she thinks of the $250K fish room. Barbara thinks the shark is scary, and Dorinda says it cost $12K.
Dorinda brings Barbara out to the pool. She says Ramona wouldn’t come unless the pool was heated. Sonja tells Barbara that LuAnn and Dorinda are getting along well. Barbara says she’s not unpacking, just in case. She got thrown out of Dorinda’s other house, so why wouldn’t she get thrown out of this one? She tells Sonja if she has to, she’ll call an Uber. Sonja tells her the phone service is not that great. She might be hitchhiking. On the sidelines, Ramona throws shade at Barbara’s fashion choices, and those boots have got to go. Dorinda says Barbara is showing her bellybutton. Even her daughter doesn’t do that. In her interview, Ramona says, Barbara is rough around the edges. Dorinda tells Ramona that Barbara doesn’t like the fish room. Sonja tells Barbara about LuAnn being upset about the room. She tells Barbara it’s an initiation thing. Barbara asks Dorinda why she got the fish room, and Dorinda says she showed up late. Last in, last choice. Sonja says, when swimming with the sharks, stay in the shark room. Fight sharks with sharks. Dorinda doesn’t want Barbara to be uncomfortable, and says she can call the hotel. Usually most people are appreciative. In her interview, she says she’s never seen such horrible manners. Sonja tells Barbara to let Dorinda calm down. LuAnn doesn’t need any drama.
In Bethenny’s interview, she says she had a nice time in Boston with a guy she’s been dating. She’s taken and given a punch or two in this house. We flash back to all that, and I’d totally forgotten about Carole. She says last year was the beginning of the end of a friendship. Let the games begin. She walks in, and there’s no one around. She says, it’s Halloween. Everyone is buriedin some cemetery in the Berkshires. She finds them outside. Barbara says, thank God, and hugs her. Sonja says they chased everyone away. Barbara pours champagne. Bethenny says she got her period, and asks what the odds are of someone having a tampon in this cobweb of vaginas. Sonja asks Tinsley if there’s any rosé, and asks her to be their truffle pig. In Tinsley’s interview, she says she’s clearly the kid sister; the runt of the litter. She goes inside to look for wine. Dorinda greets Bethenny, who goes back in with Dorinda.
Bethenny tells Dorinda that last night, she went to see A Star is Born. She didn’t know it was about drug addiction, and the guy died for her. I guess she’s never seen the three previous versions, or absolutely anything about this one? She thought about the texts between her and Dennis during his last week. She was saying she can’t do this anymore, and he kept saying he missed her. She cried for an hour. She gets teary, saying she sat by herself in the theater crying. In her interview, she says it was a stupid thing to see the movie. Dorinda tells her that it was Dennis’s journey, and not for her to determine. It’s done, and she should live her best life with her daughter. She says it’s a lonely, but growing thing, and Bethenny can call her any time. Bethenny gives Dorinda a kit to make signs. Dorinda says, no one wants to be in the fish room. She tells Bethenny about LuAnn pulling the recovery card. Bethenny wonders why LuAnn would be talking negatively behind her back. In her interview, she says they went through an intervention, and she doesn’t feel like LuAnn owes her anything, but she has zero bandwidth for anything negative or catty.
Chef Art Smith arrives. Dorinda explains he’s repping for Adrian, the Bear Naked Chef. She thinks he came along to make sure Adrian’s apron stays on. Sonja says she’s never had meal cooked for her in the nude – that she paid for. Bethenny gripes to Sonja about LuAnn being negative. In Barbara’s interview, she says if they hadn’t stepped in, LuAnn would have lost everything that’s important to her. In Bethenny’s interview, she says LuAnn should still be in the rehab room that Bethenny paid for. She left two weeks early to do cabaret. She should worry about the room she’s supposed to be in. Sonja says LuAnn is being a diva. Ramona and LuAnn sample things in the kitchen. The food, not the naked chef. In Bethenny’s interview, she thinks Barbara is on the Jim Jones lawn. She’s been hypnotized by LuAnn. She would never do something like that. Barbara tells her that LuAnn is the same LuAnn. Bethenny says she was looking for the new Lu.
LuAnn greets Barbara, and asks how it’s going. LuAnn tells her about Dorinda coming to her. It’s the first time she acknowledged what she’d done, and it was heartfelt. She owned it. Outside, Dorinda talks to Bethenny, saying she felt badly about what LuAnn said. Bethenny says LuAnn never even talked to her about Dennis. She just talked about her cabaret. She always does. Apparently, she’s substituted that for the drinking. LuAnn asks if she’s interrupting, and Bethenny says, alittle bit, and she goes back in. Dorinda laughs. She loves LuAnn, but she just doesn’t get it. Bethenny says, she doesn’t give a sh*t. In her interview, Bethenny says Dennis’s passing changed her. She’s chill. She’s not letting anything be heightened. Dorinda says LuAnn has no self-awareness. The minute she accepted that LuAnn isn’t harmful or hurtful, that it’s just who she is, it got better. Bethenny says she’s one of those friends you don’t go deep with.
The ladies check out the dining table. Barbara wants to sit at the head of table, but Ramona tells her that’s Dorinda’s seat. Barbara says she’s used to being the boss. In her interview, Ramona says, it’s notyour house, bitch. Bethenny changes into pajamas, and the girls all gather in her bed, and Sonja babbles. In Bethenny’s interview, she says, Sonja peaks early. She’s in a contained environment. They’re safe, and all together in a house. Sonja says she’s busted out tonight. Whatever that means. I think it’s another euphemism for drunk. In her interview, LuAnn admits she loves drinking – we flash back to her falling into the bushes – but watching the others drinking is like watching a 3D movie without the goggles [sic]. She can’t comprehend it anymore. We flash back to Sonja trying to make out with Bethenny during a trip. Sonja starts talking about Bethenny’s jean line, and how she has big girl sizes. Ramona says the average girl is huge, and dances in the mirror. I wonder if she’s one of those people who thinks a size 8 is huge. In her interview, she says, get real. She’s hotter than hot. Maybe, but then she opens her mouth. Tinsley and Sonja chant, rosé all day. In Ramona’s interview, she says, Sonja can’t find a middle ground. She’s either all in or all out, and Ramona wishes she wouldn’t drink so much. She asks Sonja to pace herself, but Sonja says she doesn’t drink that much, so when she does, she does.
Tinsley says, thank God the Naked Chef has an apron. He asks Tinsley to round up the girls, and she yells, he’s naked! He does have a rockin’ bod. And tattoos. In her interview, Sonja says the hairy butt was a surprise, and isn’t sure how you sell that. Ramona says the hair on his body isn’t appealing. I have HDTV, where I can see every newscaster’s nose hair, and I have no idea what they’re seeing, but whatever. Tinsley says, food and naked doesn’t work for her – ever. I tend to agree, since I’m one person who does not like eating in bed. Bethenny likes him; he’s passionate. Just keep his balls away from her soup. Adrian pours drinks. Ramona says, no, when he gets to Sonja. In her interview, Ramona says she wants to keep Sonja in check. They thank Dorinda, and toast to her.
LuAnn tells Dorinda that she probably overreacted. Probably? Dude, you have not even gotten to the second step in AA. Dorinda says she hasn’t thought about it. Bethenny is busy making a sign with the kit she brought. Sonja says no one had better come near Bethenny’s bedroom tonight. Dorinda wonders what she’s talking about, and Ramona says, she’s talking sh*t. Bethenny tells Sonja to drink a glass of water first. In Bethenny’s interview, she says, there’s a line inThis Is Spinal Tap – this one goes to eleven – Sonja is at fifteen. Sonja says she’s going all night, and picks up Ramona’s dog, holding the dog under her chin. In her interview, Ramona says when Sonja is wasted like this, she doesn’t want her holding Coco. Dorinda extracts the dog from Sonja.
Bethenny shows everyone her ring from Dennis, and Dorinda says Richard had given her a similar diamond. Sonja says, here we go. She doesn’t mind talking about Richard, but Dorinda doesn’t like talking about her husband. In Sonja’s interview, she thinks Dorinda’s biggest problem with her bringing up her ex, is that he’s a Morgan. She doesn’t want to be with John, but she likes John. But John is Joe Schmo. LuAnn and Dorinda go out for a smoke. Sonja talks about Dorinda putting her paws on the letters at Ventfort Hall. She starts to get animated, waving and pointing, and shouting, you don’t touch the effing Morgan letters! Ramona is sorry she’s upset, and Sonja starts bawling. Bethenny wonders, what just happened?
Next time, LuAnn makes fun of Bethenny, Tinsley says her dad chose drinking over the family, Dorinda tells Barbara to stop being an interloper, and Bethenny says Tinsley can’t live life on Scott’s terms.
⏰ Time Flies…
Whether you’re having fun or not. How did this get to be 25 years ago?
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Sonny introduces himself to Neil, and asks if he wants coffee. Neil just wants to know what he’s doing there.
Chase and Willow go to The Floating Rib. He asks if she’s sure she’s okay. She seems quiet. She says, other than DOD members, she’s never shown anyone else the tattoo. He’s glad she trusted him, and she says he needs to understand how insidious DOD is. Michael joins them, and Willow asks if his little sister is still involved with DOD. He says, she’s getting in deeper. He’s tried to reconnect with her, but it’s slow going. Willow says his sister is in more trouble than he realizes.
Sam goes to the attic, and looks in Harmony’s bag. She sees the tool roll, and looks through it. She says, someone’s getting a tattoo.
Shiloh greets Harmony, and asks if she’s met Kristina. She says she has, and prepared her for the ceremony. He asks if she played nice, and she says, of course. Kristina is a perfect candidate for the Trust. He’s glad she approves. Kristina also introduced her sister, and said Sam is a devoted student. He says, she’s learning. He asks if the supplies are ready in the attic, and Harmony says she’ll show him.
At the hospital, Curtis asks Jordan how dialysis went, and she says, it was a super-hot session. He says he should be jealous, and she says he might have reason to be. All of a sudden, she feels lightheaded. Curtis asks if she’s okay, and she collapses in his arms.
At The Floating Rib, Ava thanks Felicia and Laura for meeting her. She wants to discuss the problem they have in common – Ryan Chamberlain.
Curtis gives Jordan some water. She wants to get moving, and he says she just fainted. She says she was lightheaded; it can happen after dialysis. He wants a doctor to check her out, but she says she just needs to recover from the never ending calls from Margaux. Curtis says Margaux is relentless. Jordan says she chose to answer the calls, and chose to keep arguing about it. Curtis asks, about what? and she says Margaux closed the case on Ryan Chamberlain.
Ava says Ryan is MIA, and Felicia agrees he might still be alive. They need a plan of action. Laura wants to wait for the lab report to see if he was alive or dead when his hand was severed. Ava says, he probably chopped it off himself. Felicia wouldn’t put past him, if it would make the cops think he was dead. Ava says, he’s hiding; biding his time. Felicia says, he’ll wait. Give them a chance to get back to their lives and get complacent. Then he’ll come back for what he wants. Ava asks what Felicia thinks that is, and Felicia says, Ava.
Sonny tells Neil to have a seat. Neil is aware of Sonny’s reputation, but Sonny says the meeting has nothing to do with business; it involves a family member. He has a contact in security screening who said Neil has the expertise he’s looking for in rescuing people from cults. Neil asks what’s happening, and Sonny says, his daughter, Kristina. Jason says she’s heavily involved in the group Dawn of Day. Sonny says he needs Neil’s help to get her out of there.
Shiloh tells Harmony, before they go upstairs, he has good news. He found her. Harmony says, omg; where is she? He says, here in Port Charles. She’s been there for months. Harmony says she had no idea, and Shiloh says, obviously. Harmony asks if he’s seen her. He says, yes, and Harmony asks, how is she? He says, she seems well. As beautiful as ever. The only difference is, she changed her name. She goes by Willow Tait.
Willow tells Michael that she wasn’t entirely honest about her involvement with DOD. She used to be a member. She wasn’t even twenty, and it was the biggest mistake of her life. Michael asks why she left, and Willow says she knew she had to. He asks for specifics. Willow hesitates, and he says, Molly thinks Kristina has been brainwashed. Anything she can tell him would be helpful. She says, it’s hard to say. She came to her senses. Chase says Shiloh has been trying to find her since she left. He’s trying to lure her back. Michael says maybe Willow can talk to Kristina, but Willow says, members are taught to be distrustful of anyone who leaves.Shiloh instills intense loyalty, but he’s after more than loyalty. Michael asks if there’s anything criminal, but Chase says, nothing he can be prosecuted for. Michael wonders how he can help Kristina. Willow says if she’s been selected for the Trust, she’ll think it’s an honor to be chosen. Once you’re admitted, the way it’s set up, when you’re in, it’s almost impossible to get out.
Sam takes pictures of the instruments, and packs everything back up. She take pictures of the room. Outside in the hallway, Shiloh tells Harmony they need to focus on Kristina first. Sam hears them coming.
Shiloh and Harmony go into the room, and no surprise, there’s no Sam. Shiloh says, it looks good. The perfect welcome. He hopes Kristina isn’t having second thoughts. Harmony says she doesn’t know Kristina well, but she doesn’t think so. Sam was asking questions though. Shiloh says Sam is protective, but Harmony doesn’t think the words registered. Kristina is so eager, she asked to skip the pre-ceremony reflection. Shiloh asks if Harmony told her it was mandatory, and Harmony says, of course. She asks, what about Kristina’s pledge? and he says, it’s a good one. A truth about her family. It will be useful. Shiloh has to finish the preparations for midnight, and they leave. Sam comes out of hiding, and jets.
Sonny asks if Neil knows how things work at DOD. Neil says he’s heard about the organization, but his work is confidential. Sonny doesn’t care about ethics; he just wants answers. Jason looks at his phone, and has to run. Sonny asks what Neil has heard about DOD. Neil says it meets the general criteria of a cult. A charismatic leader, who gives vague promises of spiritual enlightenment. They’re xenophobic, and don’t trust outsiders. Their legitimacy comes from their leader, so Sonny’s daughter is in a cult. Sonny asks how they help her. Neil tells him, keep an open line of communication. The family needs to let her know they’re on her side. Sonny says they’re past that already. She’s cut ties, and there’s only one family member who has contact; her older brother. Sonny says he’s taking steps to remove her, and Neil says he hopes not by force.
Harmony tells Shiloh that she thinks Kristina will be a valuable addition to the circle. She’s bright, enthusiastic, and good with people. Shiloh says she’ll be beneficial. Now if they can just get Kelly… Willow to come home. Harmony reminds him that tonight is about Kristina. She’s going to prepare a drink to calm Kristina down. They walk to the kitchen, and Sam flies out the door and runs.
Michael asks Willow, what happens in the Trust? She says the member is given more responsibility. Shiloh makes them feel special, indispensable, but he’s just tightening the noose. He assures their loyalty. Michael asks what they have to do to be chosen, but she says, it’s up to Shiloh. He chooses the members, and decides when they’re ready for initiation. Michael asks what’s required? and she says, they’re asked to give themselves over to DOD in every conceivable way. After they commit, there’s no turning back.
Felicia tells Ava, if Ryan survived – and she thinks he did – he’s coming back. He literally can’t help himself. He fixated on her years ago in Texas. She saw him murder his wife, and she took Maxie and fled. He was so infatuated with her, he followed her. He was relentless, and showed up at her wedding to Mac with a bomb. He was sent to an asylum, killed his therapist, and escaped. He could have disappeared, but he came back and kidnapped Georgie just to get her attention. Ava is his new obsession, and she needs to be ready for his return. Ava says, exactly. That’s why she’s here. She needs to know everything about Ryan, so when he comes back for her, she’s ready.
Jordan tells Curtis that Margaux decided to go with the Canadian authorities on this one. She doesn’t want to spend any more time or money searching for Ryan or his remains. Curtis says if he’s still alive, he has no one looking for him. He’s been given a free pass. Jordan says she spent the entire time during her treatment arguing the point with Margaux, and got nowhere. He says, Margaux is wrong on this one, and she says, the cops can’t do anything; so he’ll have to.
Felicia says they need to take action; be in control, and seize the momentum. Lure Ryan back to Port Charles, on their timetable, not his. Ava says, that’s great in theory, but how do they manage it realistically? Felicia says, use Ava as bait.
Jordan says Curtis is the best investigator she’s ever worked with. He’s smart, intuitive, and better at documenting elements than any cop she knows. He hated the paperwork, and she says, the good news is, he’s no longer a cop, paperwork doesn’t matter. She wants him to go to Niagara Falls, and pick up where they left off. Find out who’s seen Ryan or who he’s spoken to. He asks if she thinks he’ll do better than all the professionals have. The case came up empty. She says he gets the kind of intel that cracks cases. She’d do it herself if she could. He says she’s in no position, and she says, but he is. And she needs it for her peace of mind.
Neil tells Sonny that he won’t be a party to kidnapping. Sonny says he didn’t say kidnapping, but Neil says, it was strongly implied. Sonny says, all Neil needs to know, is they’re getting her out. When she’s home, she’ll need to get her life back together. She’s smart, but just got lost. He says, a couple of years ago, his son was killed. He was a lot like Kristina; impulsive and volatile. In the end, Sonny couldn’t save him. He’s not going to have another child dead. He’s asking, please, can Neil help him get his daughter back?
Kristina comes downstairs, and tells Shiloh that she wasn’t sure what to wear. Shiloh says she looks lovely, but there’s a special garment. Another word no one uses, unless they’re in the fashion industry. Harmony says she’ll go get it. Shiloh asks if Kristina is nervous, but she says she’s eager, anticipating. Harmony told her what to expect, and she can’t wait. He heard she wanted to forego the personal reflection. She says she knows she’s ready, but he says it’s important to meditate. It’s the time to make sure she’s clear on devoting herself to DOD. The time to turn back. He wants her to be certain; it’s her choice. She says she is, but he thinks she should still meditate on the gravity of her commitment. Take the time to think. She’s always happy to be enlightened, but he didn’t really explain his part. He’ll be there, right?
Michael says, so it appears consensual, and Willow says Shiloh convinces the member it’s something they should want; an honor. Michael says, technically, no laws are broken. His phone dings, and he has to meet someone. He’s sorry to crash their date. and thanks Willow. He knows it’s difficult, but she might have saved his sister. Willow hopes so. Michael leaves, and Chase tells Willow that it was brave of her to share. She hopes it’s not too late. Kristina is almost totally submerged. She tells Chase that she can’t stand one more minute, and wants to focus on anything else that has nothing to do with DOD. He thinks he has an idea.
Jason meets Michael, and tells him that Sam is meeting them. She got some information on DOD. Michael says he did his best to get Sonny to back off, but they’re wrong. It’s worse than they realized. Sam joins them, and Michael says his friend Willow gave him some information. She was in the circle close to Shiloh. Sam says, the Trust. Michael asks if Kristina is in it, and Sam says, not yet, but she knows Shiloh is planning on initiating her tonight. She shows them the pictures, and Michael says, it’s exactly how Willow described it. Jason says, that’s tattooing equipment, and Sam says, a tangible symbol that you belong to DOD. You’re marked for life, but that’s just the beginning.
Felicia tells Ava, as long as Ryan is obsessed with her, use it. Ava says she’ll do whatever it takes, and Felicia says, lure him back. Laura says she can’t help them. Vigilante justice is never a good idea for the mayor. Ava understands her reluctance, but thinks Laura should leave before they discuss their plan further.
As they put on their skates, Willow says she’d never guess Chase was into roller disco. He says he’s never tried it. The ice skating was such a success, it was turned into a roller rink for spring and summer. She says it’s been a while since she skated. Chase says the last time he skated didn’t go so well. It was a birthday party he went to in high school. He was trying to impress a girl, and started going too fast. He couldn’t stop, and crashed into the DJ booth. She laughs, and he says, it’s not funny. He was called Wipeout for two years. He struggles to stand, and she says, come on, Wipeout. Now’s his chance.
Neil tells Sonny, once there’s an exit, the process has to be challenged. They need to show Kristina that her decision making process has been compromised, but she’ll resist. Believing her family is key. Sonny says, her mother might take convincing, but she’ll come around. She wants Kristina out like he does. Neil flashes back taking to Alexis saying Kristina’s father is impatient. He wants to get her out now, and deal with the psychological ramifications later. He’s prepared to kidnap her. Neil tells Sonny that Kristina is fortunate. Not everyone has the same level of parental involvement. With prior exits, there hasn’t been great success. Followers are taught to resist outsider’s opinions, and anyone who criticizes the principals and teachings. Sonny asks, will he help? Neil says his last exit therapy ended badly. He doesn’t think he’s the right person to help Sonny’s daughter.
Sam tells Jason and Michael that she overheard Harmony talking about how Kristina pledged to give Shiloh something. It’s about the family. Michael asks who Harmony is, and Jason says she’s Shiloh’s number two, and in charge of Beechers Corners. Sam says she’s there for Kristina’s initiation. Michael tells them that Willow said Shiloh chooses the criteria for the pledge, but didn’t tell them anything specific. Jason asks how Kristina is. Sam says, she’s excited to be part if Shiloh’s inner circle, and Michael says, she has no idea what’s coming.
Shiloh tells Kristina that he doesn’t participate in the actual ceremony. She thought since DOD was his vision, he would. He says, the Trust is a community within the community. It’s a special sisterhood, and she needs to bond with them. They’ve gone through the ritual already, and will welcome her into their company. She says, so he has no part in the initiation? but he says he never said that.
Felicia tells Ava not to let Laura’s goody-goody mayor act fool her. Laura is the real deal. Laura asks what they have in mind. She’s not committing; just asking. Felicia says, Ryan’s Achille’s Heel is his pride. He can’t stand when someone beats him. Ava says he lost it when Franco went public with his fake confession, and took credit for his genius. Laura says, when he held them in Ferncliff, Doc manipulated him by pointing out his mistakes, and it caused him to make more. Felicia says it was the same with her and Mac. Ryan lost all his common sense trying to tear them apart. Ava asks if Felicia is suggesting she find a new man and flaunt it. Felicia says it would infuriate him, and motivate him to come back to claim her for himself.
Curtis asks if Jordan wants him to head up to Canada and do a comprehensive search. Jordan says it’s the only way to know if Ryan survived. He says his wife is having a health crisis, but she says it was just dialysis. He says she lost one kidney, and the other is compromised. He needs to be there; he loves her. Jordan says she understands, but he’ll need more than that to get her to take it easy for the foreseeable future. She needs to rest up. If Ryan survived, and is heading to Port Charles, she needs to be ready. He says, gearing up to do battle with a serial killer isn’t resting. He might have to tie her to the bed. She says only if she gets to tie him up too. Her phone rings. He tells her not to answer if it’s Margaux. She says it’s the forensics lab. The results on Ryan’s hand are in.
Sonny says Neil is an expert at exit therapy, but Neil says there are other experts. He can give Sonny a referral. Sonny says he doesn’t need a referral. He can tell Neil is smart and perceptive, and he doesn’t want to waste time. He understands what Kristina is going through, and has the skill to help her. Neil tells him flattery isn’t going to help, and Sonny tells him to name a price.
Shiloh says after she’s welcomed to the Trust, he’ll complete the initiation. Kristina asks how that works, and he says she’ll find out when she’s ready. She’ll have hours to tell him all about what happened in her own special way. She can’t wait. Harmony brings her the garment for her initiation. Shiloh says he forgot; he doesn’t have a picture with Kristina. He asks Harmony to take one. She tells them, smile and say Dawn of Day.
Michael tells Sam and Jason, the honoree is left alone for fifteen minutes to reflect on their commitment. Shiloh makes a big deal about it being the final offer to back out. Jason says so he can’t be nailed for anything illegal. Michael says, he’s not there for the tattoo part, but afterward, he welcomes the honoree into the Trust by having sex with them.
Laura thinks baiting Ryan is practically suicide, but Ava says justice for her daughter is worth it. Felicia says they’ll have a safeguard, and Laura says, what kind? Say they’re right, and Ryan is coming back for Ava. If he believes she’s happy with her new man, he’ll be in a jealous rage. What’s to stop him from killing the two of them? Ava pats her bag, and says she has a handle on it. Felicia says, it’s risky, but if he’s out there, they need to stop him. Does Laura have a better idea?
Jordan tells Curtis that Ryan was alive when his hand was severed. Curtis says, the injury could have killed him; he could have bled out. Jordan says, or survived.
Willow tells Chase she had so much fun, and he lived up to his name. He says, the humiliation was worth it. He got to take her out. They kiss.
Sonny tells Neil, once Kristina is out, he can step in. Neil says he hasn’t agreed, and Sonny says he’ll pay whatever Neil wants. Neil says, it’s not about money. Sonny says, it’s about Kristina’s life, future, and freedom. She’s made mistakes, and this one could take her down.She needs to get her head on straight. Can Neil help her? Neil agrees, and says once Sonny has her away from DOD, he’ll step in. They shake hands, and Sonny thanks him. Neil says to let him know when he’s needed.
Michael says he has to tell Kristina, and Jason asks if he thinks it would change her mind. Sam says, notat all. Kristina is honored. Michael says if he can’t convince her, they’ll have to take her. Jason says he’ll handle it. It’s better Kristina be mad at him. It will give Michael room to help her. He’s going to talk to the bartender and establish an alibi. He leaves, and Sam says they have to hurry. Kristina is being initiated at midnight.
Shiloh leads Kristina is to the attic. She goes inside, and says, it’s amazing. She had no idea what was up there. Shiloh says only members of the Trust are allowed to see it, and soon, she’ll be one of them. He brings out a sheet, and says he’s transferred her pledge to print for her to sign. She says, like a contract? but he says, more like a safeguard; in case something happens to the recording. Kristina hopes he put it away for safekeeping, and he asks if she’s questioning the ritual and her commitment. She says she’s committed, and signs. I’m thinking she should be committed. Shiloh says, very good, and takes the paper. Kristina wants to make him proud; repay him for everything he’s given her. He strokes her hair, and says she’s such a special person. He tells her, enjoy the ceremony, and leaves. She waits and smiles, but her smile looks a little hesitant.
Tomorrow, Maxie asks Peter if he’s staying or going, Chase has something he hopes Willow is into, and Jason says he’s getting Kristina out.
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
I’m bummed before the show even starts, and oh great, we see part of the fight again.
24 hours later. Kyle tells the others (minus LVP and LisaR), they won’t believe what happened. She went to LVP’s because she felt bad. As a friend, she couldn’t say LVP wouldn’t do this. LVP wants her to swoop in, but when it comes not telling truth, she’s not willing to do that. In her interview, Kyle says she thought the issues with LVP were over, until Dorit found the article online. Immediately, the women assumed LVP was behind the story. As her friend, Kyle felt awful about the conversation behind LVP’s back. We see clips of that conversation. Kyle tells them that she wanted to tell the truth, and lay everything on the table, but it was angry and hostile. Ken said he hoped she’d told the others it wasn’t true, but she said she couldn’t do that. He said she wasn’t his or LVP’s effing friend, and to get out. Throughout her story, we keep flashing back to this total downer. LVP told her there was nothing left to say, and asked her to leave. She could have said she was sorry Kyle felt that way. Anything but this. Erika says, that’s not friendship; that’s bullsh*t. Zzzzz… Erika. I’m tired of her acting like she knows everything because she’s a C-list celebrity who dances around in spandex, and is moderately successful because she has the bucks and is on this show.
We see pink roses at Villa Rosa, delivered for LVP’s birthday. Giggy! Giggy licks tea from Ken’s finger. LVP doesn’t think Ken ever lost it like that. She tells Ken that kitchen designer Steven is coming. She asks why Ken looks worried, and wonders if it’s the expense or the thought of them not living with a cooking facility. It’s going to be more expensive than she told him, and he says he knew it would be. Steven arrives, and says he has good stuff to show her. LVP makes tea. In her interview, she says it didn’t feel right to have a big birthday celebration, since losing her brother. Ken and Pandora are throwing her a surprise party, so she’s just going along with it. She shows Steven a locket the kids got her, with pictures of them, Ken, and Nanny Kay. In LVP’s interview, she says she’s taken a lot of stuff from Kyle. We flash back to Kyle wondering who Nanny Kay is, and LVP says, it’s the little things like that, that hurt. She asks Steven when they’re starting. She wants a transformed space, and wants it fresh, bright, and positive. He shows her a cabinet door, and says they still need to hit the stone yards for options. She quite likes the countertop material. Steven says, it will be a lot of white; she’ll have a lighter, happier kitchen. In LVP’s interview, she says she hasn’t had a good time in that kitchen lately. Kyle was aggressive, and she wants a new beginning, and to create something gorgeous. She tells Ken the kitchen has a negative vibe, and she wants it gone.
Kyle meets Mauricio for dinner. In her interview, she says their date nights have changed over twenty-five years. It was all about the kids, then business, and now it’s where do they see themselves in ten years? Mauricio asks how her day was, and she says she likes to have a lot of balls in the air. He says he had a great day, meeting with amazing developers. A waiter grates truffles on the pasta, and Kyle finds out they’re $3K a pound. She tells Mauricio, a few weeks ago, she woke up thinking things felt different. There’sbeen a shift in energy. Mauricio says, things can’t be perfect all the time. She knows there have been problems here and there, but this feels sad. She still hasn’t spoken to LVP. Mauricio says they were such good friends. Kyle feels horrible, and still loves her.
LVP tells Ken she doesn’t want love like that. She wouldn’t love someone who she thought was manipulative and a liar.
Kyle tells Mauricio the only reason there’s an issue is because she didn’t stand up and say LVP wouldn’t do this. Mauricio is shocked at how Ken spoke to Kyle, and says, it’s unacceptable.
LVP tells Ken that he came on strong. He agrees, and says when Kyle picked on her, he saw red.
Mauricio tells Kyle that she should stand up for her friends, but at the end of the day, she has to be true to herself. In Kyle’s interview, she thought she and LVP were in a place where they would never fight again. She hates the bad feelings. She tells Mauricio that LVP holds friendship as a ransom. Mauricio says, she’s always been like that. Kyle feels sad.
LVP tells Ken, she can say she’s hurt, or that she doesn’t like what Kyle did, but she’s not going to stand there and say what an effing bitch she was. Oops. She just said it.
Dorit experiments with smoothies for PK, with help from PK’s assistant Sadie. In her interview, Dorit says, PK was diagnosed with diabetes before they met. It’s been a daily struggle. She tells Sadie, if PK doesn’t change his lifestyle, it will become irreversible. He can’t wrap his head around it being a serious illness. We see clips of him stuffing his face and drinking like a fish. She wants him to be able to enjoy what he eats, and he can, as long as it’s balanced. She and Sadie puzzle over the bullet blender. Sadie turns it on and runs. Dorit can’t shut it off, and Sadie ends up pulling the plug. They make a smoothie, and Dorit is the tasting guinea pig. In her interview, she says she’ll try anything to trick PK into eating healthier, but this is the most disgusting smoothie she’s ever tasted. If she can’t swallow it, there’s no way PK will. She tells Sadie that she feels like she’s drinking… Sadie says, compost?
LisaR, Denise, and Erika go to a flying yoga session. In her interview, LisaR say she’s game to try anything. Maybe she’s going through a midlife yoga crisis. Denise and Erika don’t five a f***. Those are her kind of people. Mine too, but I’m sticking with just Denise. The instructor explains how it works. They hang upside down, and LisaR asks if it hurts their Botox. In LisaR’s interview, she says it’s absurd, but it’s not like she hasn’t been upside down with her legs spread before. Well, maybe not upside down. They right themselves. In Denise’s interview, she says she’s up for any type of exercise, but she doesn’t get this or what it does. It’s one of those weird LA classes. The instructor congratulates them on their first inversion. Erika gets stuck. You’d think she’d be the one who could do it with all the jumping around she does on stage. In her interview, she says she will not be incorporating aerial work into her show.
Erika says she had a great time at the wedding. Kyle told her that she was going to see LVP, and LisaR says Kyle claimed it got heated, and they threw her out of the house. In LisaR’s interview, she says she’s seen Kyle and LVP fight and come back together tons of times. It must be devastating for Kyle. To be kicked out of the house is pretty major; a whole other level. LisaR wants to get together for Denise next Friday, since she couldn’t be there. Erika has rehearsal, and can’t make it. She’s excited the tour has sold out in Chicago. In her interview, she says, when you find out people are hungry for you, you want to go everywhere you possibly can. Forget your families; you’re on the road, so merry Christmas. Denise can’t wait to see her show. Erika says she’s welcome to jump on the tour.
Aaron puts up security cameras. Denise says now they can see if people sneak in or out. In her interview, she explains that Sammie is in high school, and that’s when kids start sneaking out. She started at fifteen. She’s putting up cameras, so they can catch her. She tells Aaron, at least they’re honest. They could have hid them. I don’t think I ever snuck out, but I didn’t always go where I said I was going. They do some barbecuing, since they’re flying solo tonight. Denise likes hanging out with Aaron. She feels badly for Kyle, and asks Aaron if women fighting is weird. Men are different. He says they just take it outside, and she says women go on and on and on. In her interview, she says, Aaron is a great sounding board for girl talk. He actually listens, and gives good input. She asks him if she should talk to LVP, and he asks what she wants to achieve by getting in the middle of it. She says her experiences with LVP have been lovely, and she’s been kind to Eloise. Aaron says it’s tough be in her position. They just met, and LVP appears to be nice. Denise says she doesn’t want to get on LVP’s bad side. If she did this, she plays dirty. In Denise’s interview, she says she’s encountered dirty players. At the time, she kept her mouth shut, but in hindsight, she’d fight fire with fire. Aaron says LVP will probably call her. If the opportunity presents itself, okay, but whatever happens, speak her truth. She says when she talks to LVP, she’ll see where it goes.
In her interview, Dorit explains that PK has type 2 diabetes, but is on the cusp of going into type 1, which is more serious and irreversible. She tries desperately to get him to eat healthy, but it’s virtually impossible to get him to eat vegetables. She’s trying to undo his lifestyle for something healthier. She checks his blood, and says, it’s 318. PK jokes that he’s close to a diabetic coma, but Dorit doesn’t think it’s funny. She can’t get through to him. In Dorit’s interview, she says he’s an impossible patient. He brushes it off, and says he’ll do it tomorrow, and it’s frustrating. If she saw anything was registering, she would feel hope. Jaeger asks Dorit to take the dill off his cracker or whatever. She tells PK there’s been no communication with LVP. He wasn’t aware they’d fallen out, and she says she wasn’t aware either. She has no idea where LVP’s head is. PK says she didn’t ask him to come to her birthday. Why didn’t she invite anyone? Dorit can’t answer for her. In her interview, once again she says she didn’t do anything wrong, and I scream in my head. PK says, when LVP is ready, she’ll tell him the way she feels. Dorit says LVP will get to the point when she wants talk, and when she does, Dorit will be ready and available. Until then, she’s getting on with life.
Teddi meets LisaR for lunch. Teddi says she’s been super busy. She’s started falling asleep giving her daughter a goodnight kiss. LisaR misses those days. She says, they go by fast, and then they tell you, get out. The others are joining them, but Denise is stopping for a drink with LVP before she comes.
Kyle calls Denise, who says she’ll be late. She’s meeting LVP at TomTom. In her interview, Denise says, like Aaron said would happen, she heard from LVP, who asked her to stop by. Kyle says it’s her birthday celebration. Denise doesn’t know if she can help smooth things over, but she’s willing to give it a shot. Kyle doesn’t know if LVP will respond, but asks Denise to tell her happy birthday. She hasn’t heard from LVP, but maybe Denise can bridge the gap.
My brain shorts out when I see Schwartz and Tom on the wrong show. It’s not computing. In Denise’s interview, she says her experiences with LVP have been lovely. She wants to be there for her. She doesn’t want to confront LVP, but wants to listen to her.
Teddi asks if LisaR has talked to LVP, and she says they had a little text. She’d tweeted a birthday tweet. We see a picture of her hands showing off cupcakes that have pills for decorations. In her interview, LisaR says it’s become a running joke for her and her family about her bag o’ pills. It started with LVP and Dorit. We flash back to them joking about her pill bag. She says everybody thinks it’s funny because she’s not a pill popper, and if she was, it wouldn’t be funny. People pointed out that it might not be funny because of LVP’s brother dying, and when she thought LVP might take it another way, she sent a text saying it was a joke. LVP texted back that she was glad it wasn’t intended another way because of her brother. LisaR tells Teddi that she didn’t know he died the way he did. Really? Because I did, and I’m not even part of their group. In LisaR’s interview, she says people told her it was in poor taste, and she was like, oh no. Teddi says she’d never think that, and thinks LVP knows that. LisaR says her sister died of an overdose, and she’d never make a joke about it. It’s a very sensitive subject, and understandably so.
LVP asks Ken who he invited, and he says nobody who will upset her birthday. LVP says it’s a sad situation. Kyle should be coming; they’ve celebrated every birthday together. We flash back, and I feel sad all over again. Ken says he’s not letting anything ruin it, so he couldn’t include Kyle and Dorit. LVP says she’s happy without them, but doesn’t look happy.
Kyle arrives at Beauty & Essex, and joins Teddi and LisaR. She complains about the traffic Dorit is next, and IMO, looks absolutely stupid with her boobs practically falling out of her dress, the neckline is so low and wide. It’s like something a Kardashian would wear. In her interview, LisaR says, Dorit looks good, but obviously, that gets a no from me. On the other hand, when Camille arrives, she looks adorable in a romper that’s age appropriate, or at least for the age she looks.
Denise waits at TomTom. In her interview, she says she’s waiting for a drink with LVP before the celebration. Guests are guest arriving, and she feels awkward. Some dude talks to her. She has no idea who he is, but she’ll talk to anyone in a bar. At least he’s being nice to her.
The girls order, and ask Camille about her upcoming wedding. In her interview, LisaR says she didn’t invite anyone to her wedding who made the hair on the back of her neck stand up. We flash back to Camille saying that about Dorit. LisaR wonders, who the eff does that? She asks if Kyle has talked to LVP, but she hasn’t. LisaR says Denise is meeting her for a drink, and Dorit wonders why Denise got invited, and not them. She’s known Denise for ten seconds. Maybe so, but Denise is cooler than all of the rest of them put together.
LVP arrives at TomTom. She greets a few people, including a lady who’s been carrying around a dog that’s really too big to carry around. Giggy! In her interview, Denise says she feels sad for LVP. She’s putting on a happy face, but she knows LVP has to feel sad that the other women aren’t there. Denise gives her a gift bag, and LVP asks if she wants to stay. Denise says she has another dinner; otherwise, she would. Maybe they can have lunch next week. In her interview, Denise guesses LVP forgot, but she knows there’s a lot on her mind. Denise says she knows about the discord, and LVP says it’s devastating to her. She doesn’t want to drag Denise in. Denise knows she feels… LVP says, attacked?There’s a pause, and LVP thanks her for coming.
Denise joins the girls. Kyle asks how married life is. Denise says everything is good, and thanks LisaR for putting the dinner together. She apologizes for being late. Kyle asks how LVP is, and Denise says, happy her friends and family are there. She told LVP that she wanted to get together for lunch. She doesn’t know her that well, and they have no history. She mentioned that she sees there’s discord, so she’ll see if there’s a way to mend it or not. In Kyle’s interview, she says not speaking to LVP, and not spending her birthday with her is weird. They’re always together. Dorit doesn’t understand why LVP is upset with everyone. LisaR says she has no beef with LVP. Kyle says they were all talking until she went to the house; then everyone got cut off. In her interview, Dorit says when LVP is feeling hurt, she pushes everyone away. She’ll speak to them when she feels they’ve been appropriately punished. Denise thinks she was hesitant to talk because all of her guests were right there, but she seems to be doing okay. *See below for LVP’s explanation.
Giggy! LVP greets Kevin Lee and Mohamed Hadid. I guess she and Mohamed mended fences. Max says he heard she was having trouble with her friends. LVP asks who told him, and he says, Pandy. She doesn’t want to talk about it, and Pandora says she can count on them. LVP asks if Max isn’t working tonight; he must know the owners. JohnS tells her that they have something prepared for her. Maybe involving a stripper. Several servers come out with sparklers, followed with a cake carried by half-naked dudes. She says, thank God they have trousers on. She thanks everyone for caring. It’s been a tough year this year, and she hopes for a better one. She loves them, and their friendship means everything to her. She thanks them for being there, and says, now, let’s party.
LisaR toasts to Denise and Aaron, and many happy years together. Kyle says, and the next bride. They toast to Camille. She says she doesn’t even remember being in bed with Kelsey. It was never that hot and heavy. She did learn a lot because of him, but the love petered out at the end. We flash back to how he screwed her over, and her saying the other woman doesn’t know she destroyed a family. Denise likes how Camille said, petered out; she’s using that. Kyle loves when Camille gets like that. We flash back to her saying Kelsey was a terrible kisser. In her interview, Kyle says it’s entertaining when Camille gets on a roll. You never know what will come out of her mouth. Denise suggests Camille have another drink. They discuss man-grooming, and Camille says she used to be a dental assistant, so she’s particular. She says before LVP got her teeth redone, she told her that she needed new caps; her gumline was receding. In her interview, Dorit thinks Camille should zip it. In Teddi’s interview, she says she has issues with LVP, but this kind of talk is next level, and there’s no going back. Camille says she’s going down. Just bring her casket to the wedding.
*On Watch What Happens Live, LVP (a solo guest) explained that the reason she pushed away from all of them was because Kyle told her they all felt that way. While I’m on the subject, Andy is also starting to grow a beard, and no. Just no.
Next time, a surprise shower for Camille, LVP helps demo the kitchen, Lois is in town, and Camille and LisaR tangle about Judge Cavanaugh.
If Loving You Is Wrong
Tanya is freaking out, naked in the street. Lushion tells Natalie to call 911. Randal comes out and says, she’s in psychosis. Tanya says she won’t stop following her. Randal asks, who? but Tanya doesn’t know. He asks if she likes red; it’s a pretty color. She says she does, but then starts making rhymes. She tells him, all God’s children go to heaven. Dogs too. Randal asks if she’s ever had a dog, and she says she has, but the weeping willow tree killed him. He says she must be cold, and she says her skin is fur and warm. He asks if he can put a blanket on her, saying the elk in Yellowstone need covers. He puts the blanket around her shoulders. She accepts it, but then yells, no, no, no! and runs home.
Natalie asks Lushion, what’s going on? He says, it’s some kind of breakdown. He’s going to call the station, and have them do a welfare check. Randal says he’d better hurry, and Natalie says, like he cares. He says he doesn’t. She tells him, show some decency, and he asks, what’s that? He sees Alex is home, and says he’ll come by tomorrow after work to see the baby. She says, okay, and he tells her, wear something sexy. She goes back inside. Lushion starts walking toward Tanya’s house, and Natalie asks where he’s going. He says he’s waiting for the medic, and Natalie asks, what if she has a gun? He tells her, go in the house, but she doesn’t like this. He says, he need to help, but she tells him, let the professionals do it. He says he is one. Natalie thought she was off when they met her. Lushion asks if Natalie knows her name, and Natalie says, Tanya. She lives with her husband; he’s a firefighter. Lushion asks if she’s seen him in uniform, and if he works for Maxine. She asks why he’s interrogating her. She’s not one of his suspects. He tells her, go in the house.
Tanya’s husband pulls up. Lushion tries to get his attention, but he says he has to check on his wife. He runs inside, and Lushion tells Natalie, it looks like they have some new neighbors. Natalie says one is crazier than this a-hole, indicating Randal. Eddie drives up, and she says, even worse. Eddie walks toward Lushion, throwing money in the air, and telling Lushion to buy some rounds. Lushion and Natalie walk back to their house, and Eddie struts over to Alex’s place. She tells him, get away, and he asks, where’s Brad? She says he’s not there, and the kids are sleeping. She tells him to go home to his wife, but he says she hasn’t talked to him for years; he has no home. He sticks his foot in the door, but she says she’s not letting him in. He says she’s his cousin, and she says, go to hell. He tells her that he needs to use the bathroom, and asks where Brad is again. They trade insults until Alex finally tells him to move his foot. He says he needs to take a piss, but she doesn’t care. She pushes him out, and closes door.
Eddie goes over to Randal’s house. He says, this SOB, and pees on Randal’s lawn. I guess he wasn’t kidding. He walks around the yard, peeing, and up onto the porch. That Tyler Perry, always full of surprises. I can’t say I’ve ever seen this before. Randal opens the door, and asks why Eddie is there. Eddie says he’s taking a piss, and Randal says, get off. Eddie says, when he’s done, and moonwalks backward while peeing. I’m dying laughing. Randal throws water at him, and comes down to the lawn. He tells Eddie that he has no idea what’s coming for him. He heard what Eddie did with Larry. Eddie asks if she said how much it turned her on, and Randal says Larry didn’t mention that. Eddie says, she should have. Randal asks how much Eddie knows about Larry, and he says Larry is a punk, like Randal. Randal says he’s going to enjoy this. Eddie has more than met his match. The difference between them is that Larry is smart. He’s looking forward to this. I am too, and it’s probably the first time Randal and I will ever agree. Eddie says he lives for this. Randal tells him, enjoy his last days. Even pussy… cats like Eddie only have nine lives. Eddie says he runs this junk, and Randal wonders how well a lion does in the ocean against a shark. Eddie says any time Randal wants to dance, let him know. Randal can’t say it’s been nice knowing him, but he is saying, clean this up.
Ben tells Tanya to take her pills, but she refuses. He says she told him that she’s been taking them. What is she doing with them? She says she has been, but won’t take the one he’s trying to give her. He tries to force it into her mouth. Outside, Eddie hears them yelling, and runs over. He bangs on the door, says, police, and comes in with his gun drawn. He asks if Tanya is okay. She says she is, and he asks if Ben is hurting her. She says, yes, and Ben says, she’s mentally ill. He just made her take her meds. He tells Tanya to let Eddie know she’s okay. She toddles off to the bedroom, and Eddie says, one more word, and he’s taking Ben’s ass to jail. He closes the door and lowers his gun. He asks what Ben is doing. He heard her screaming. Take a sock, and ram it in her mouth so no one can hear it, or he’ll have all kinds of cops here. He doesn’t want that. Ben asks if he’s serious, and Eddie says, shut a bitch up, or everyone will hear his business. Ben says, it’s not that, and Eddie says he’s been there before. Ben asks again if he’s serious, and Eddie says, dead serious. He shakes Ben’s hand, and says, shut the ho up. Don’t make him come back. He leaves, and I’m guessing Ben is sorry he ever moved there.
Natalie asks if Lushion thinks it’s drugs, but he says, no. It looked like something else. She hopes Tanya isn’t dangerous. Lushion says he’ll keep an eye on her. His phone rings. He wants to ignore it, but Natalie tells him to get it. It’s Ian, who wants to talk when Lushion gets off work. Natalie suggests Lushion invite him for dinner, and Ian in says, okay. Lushion asks Natalie why she wants him to come over, and she says she wants him to help Kelly. Lushion says she’d better convince him. She turns her back to him, but he says she’s not sleeping now, and kisses the back of her neck.
At their apartment, Marcie asks Brad if he’s working today. He says he’s stopping by the house for Alex to sign the divorce papers first. He doesn’t think there will be a problem. She says that’s better than Randal. Brad asks how she got him to sign them, and she says she’s calling Larry, and asking him. As long as she’s free. Hallelujah! He thanks her for last night. Esperanza calls, and Marcie asks how Kelly is. Esperanza thinks she’s better, but she’s going to try and get more details today. She heard Randal signed the divorce papers, and asks how Marcie got him to do that. Marcie says, it wasn’t easy. Esperanza asks who helped her, and Marcie says, a lawyer. Esperanza says, the one who tied Eddie up? He’s so weird. Marcie doesn’t care; she’s free. Esperanza needs help, and Marcie asks, what kind? She needs to find a way to threaten Eddie; get him to leave her alone. She can’t do this anymore. She’s exhausted. Marcie asks if she wants Larry’s number, and she says it wouldn’t hurt.
Marcie calls Larry, and asks what he did. How did he get Randal to sign the papers. Larry says, it’s done. Marcie says, Ian said he filed them, so it’s legal now? She’s divorced? He says she doesn’t have to worry, and she says Randal is mad as hell. Larry says, he’ll calm him down. He thinks knows Randal pretty well. Marcie says she didn’t know Randal was into… Larry says, Randal had quite a past. She says, like what?Like what he did to Eddie? Larry says, something like that. She says, S&M? Larry says, that’s on him, not Randal. She says, not that it matters, but she would have liked to have known. Larry says she can trust him. Her ex was a bit of a swinger. Marcie says, whatever Larry did, she thanks him. He says it was the least he could do. She hopes it doesn’t come back to haunt her, but Larry says, it won’t. She tells him that she has a friend who needs legal advice, and she’s going to give him a call. She thanks him again. She looks at her empty ring finger.
On the phone, Randal asks what do they mean, telling him it’s filed. What if he didn’t know what he was signing? He says, go to the judge. What if his attorney tricked him into signing. It’s his word against the judge’s? Go to hell. He calls Larry’s office, and says, bitch, you know who this is. He calls all the time. Hello? I die laughing for the second time.
Alex and Natalie see the kids off at the bus stop. Natalie asks how Alex is, and Alex says, okay. Alex says, Justice looked okay. She asks if he knows, and Natalie says, no. He keeps asking to talk to her though. They’ll have to tell him something, but they’re waiting to see that Kelly is doing better. She asks if Randal is still bothering Alex, and Alex says she’s going to let him see the baby. Natalie asks if she’s sure, and Alex says, no, but she has to keep the peace somehow. Natalie says they’ve been over this, and Alex says she’s going to do another test. She doesn’t want to talk to him, but it’s her mess. She tells Natalie that Brad is asking for a divorce. She knew that was coming, and she’s not fighting it. She’s so tired of fighting. As long as he takes care of the house, kids, and everything else. Geez. She’s not asking too much. Good luck with that. Natalie is sorry, and Alex says, it’s amazing how one mistake can change your entire life in such an awful way. What can you do? Natalie says, deal with it. Alex says that’s what she’s going to do. Natalie asks if Alex saw Tanya, and Alex asks, what was that? Natalie says, Lushion thinks she’s mentally ill. Speaking of which… Ben runs up to them.
Natalie asks if everything is okay, and Ben says that his fiancé told him that she and the officer had helped. He thanks her, saying it’s better than their last situation. Now they have a police officer and psychologist on the same block. Alex says, Randal? and he says Randal talked to Tanya the other day. Natalie tells him, be careful with him. Everybody’s not what they appear to be. Ben says, okay. Tanya said he came by, so Ben figured he’d introduced himself. Natalie says, it may start that way. Alex asks, what’s going on? and Ben says his fiancé is mentally ill. She has to take lithium. If she doesn’t, she has delusions, and isn’t herself, but he promises they have nothing to worry about. Natalie asks if he’s sure she isn’t dangerous, but he says he tries to stay on her. Alex asks how he can tell when she’s not taking it, and he says she doesn’t know until she has a breakdown. He wants to trust her. Alex says she’s sorry, and Ben asks if she’s doing better today. She says she is, and asks how long they’ve been married. Since he’s been saying, fiancé, apparently she’s not listening. He says they’ve been together since high school. She just got sick a few years ago. Alex asks if it came out of nowhere, and he says, her mother had it, but they figured she wouldn’t. Natalie is sorry, and Ben says, just deal with it. Natalie tells him that they were just saying that. Ben gives them his number in case he’s at work and Tanya needs him. Natalie says he didn’t give it to Randal, did he? He says he was headed there next, and she tells him, hold off on that. Ben asks, why? Isn’t he a good guy? Natalie says, hell no. he’s crazy as hell. She lists all his psychoses, and tells Ben to keep his distance. Ben suggests she tell him how she really feels. He says he’ll stay away, and thanks them. He tells Alex that he’s glad she’s doing better, and he goes back home.
Brad pulls up. Alex asks if he wants to come in, and he says, unless she’s signing in front of the neighborhood. They’ll need a witness, and he asks Natalie. Alex says, it’s okay; she agreed to sign the papers. He’s brought a notary with him. They go inside.
Brad shows her where to sign, and I wonder if she doesn’t want to read it. Alex asks if Brad is sure he wants to do this, and he says he’s never been so sure of anything. Alex says she needs to read it first. Thank you. He says all she needs to know is, he’s divorcing her. She says she needs to read it, and he says he’ll wait. She says she needs a lawyer; someone to look at it. He says he’s not messing around, and she says, wait. Natalie suggests giving it a day. Let someone look at it. Brad says, after what she’s done?After everything she’s done, she doesn’t deserve the courtesy. Natalie says, Ian could look at it; a daywon’t matter. She won’t be a witness if Brad won’t let Alex talk with somebody. He says, it’s ridiculous, and tells Alex, 24 hours. Um… that’s not how any of this works. He leaves, and Alex cries. Natalie is sorry, and Alex says, it is what it is. She thanks Natalie, who says she should let Ian look at it. Alex says, okay, and Natalie tells her that he’s coming over for dinner. She can ask him then. She says, it’s going to be allright, and hugs Alex.
Outside Kelly’s room, Lushion asks if Rick was there all night. Rick says he was, and he’s staying there the rest of the day. He wants to be there when Kelly wakes up. Lushion asks, what’s going on? and Rick says he’s doing his job. Lushion isn’t buying it; there’s something else. Rick says he screwed up. He should have taken her more seriously. Lushion says, like when she told him about Travis? Now he’s feeling guilty? Rick says he went to Travis’s father’s church too, and Lushion wonders if everybody in Maxine goes there. Rick says, he’s a powerful man. Lushion says, his son was sick. Rick says he worked security for the church, and has information. Lushion asks if it’s on Travis, and Rick says he’s trying to get proof. The place is locked down like a cult. They’re coming for her; that he knows. Lushion says he needs everything he can get if. If Rick gets any information, he wants to know.
Lushion goes in to see Kelly. She says she slept so long, and he says she probably needed it. She says she doesn’t need to be chained up. Lushion looks around, and uncuffs her. She cries, and thanks him. He says, don’t tell anybody. She sits up, and he helps her out of bed. He tells her, don’t go too far; get her bearings. She asks how Justice is, and if they told him. Lushion says Natalie is looking after Justice, and they didn’t. She can’t believe she’s going to jail for the rest of her life, but Lushion says they’re not letting that happen. She says she told Rick about the chaplain who showed up. She goes to Travis’s church, and said there were other women. Lushion asks what her name is, and Kelly says, Margaret. He says Rick knows someone there too, and he’s working on getting information. He has more good news. Ian is going to rep her. Kelly claps her hands together, and asks if he’s really good. Lushion says, yes, but his partner reps the church. She asks how they can trust him, and Lushion says they’re having him over for dinner tonight. He’ll keep a close eye on him. She says what she wouldn’t give for a good breakfast. Lushion says it’s not a crime; he’ll get her one. He has to cuff her again, but she says it’s her, and where would she be going? He says if a nurse sees, he’ll get in trouble, but he’ll go to the cafeteria and be right back. He tells her, at least get in bed, and cover up. If anyone comes in, they won’t know she’s not handcuffed. She gets in, and pulls up the covers, and he leaves.
Esperanza calls Larry. She says she needs to speak to a good lawyer, and he says, at her service. She says she has a lot of crazy information about her ex, and wonders if there’s a way to get him to leave her alone. Larry tells her, start with his name, and she says, Edward Willis. He says, the officer? The one he tied up? It was of Eddie’s own accord. She knows he’s not into Eddie, but she needs to find a way to threaten him, so she can live her life. She can’t live like this. He tells her, come by the office.
Randal comes out of nowhere, and starts punching Larry. Where is the bitch secretary Randal is always complaining about? Randal is going to ask him one time only. Did he trick him into signing the divorce papers? Larry says he didn’t trick Randal, and Randal asks how he got them signed. Larry says, thesituation is completely unhealthy, and Randal says he’s getting Larry’s ass disbarred. Larry tells him, calmdown. Randal will thank him one day. Randal asks, why? and Larry says he’s locked in the past. They’ve always looked out for each other. Someone looks in, and Larry says he’s good. Larry say he knows what Marcie had on Randal. With the emotional distress alone, she could take all that he has. She lost the baby, and was going to come at him for murder. All the pain and suffering he caused her; he’s seen stranger things happen. Randal says, don’t speak to him again. Larry says, don’t do this, but Randal says, never. Larry tells him, he has to let it go; it’s no good. Randal walks out.
Lushion returns to Kelly’s room, saying he’s brought the breakfast of champions, but Kelly is gone. Lushion says, damn it, Kelly.
Next time, Esperanza meets with Eddie; Eddie tells Esperanza if he can’t have her, no one can; Marcie is past done dealing with Randal; Randal spies on Tanya; Tanya doesn’t want to talk to Randal again; and Esperanza asks Larry if he can hire someone to kill him. I assume she means Eddie.
(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)
General Hospital
Jason tells Sonny, it’s still always an option. Sonny says, even though he got caught again? Jason says, no. Sam is worried that Kristina will come back to the same conclusion, even if he gets rid of Shiloh. Sonny says, she’ll turn it onto herself. He doesn’t want that. Jason says, it’s his call. Sonny doesn’t agree, but Jason says, the longer they wait, the worse this gets. Sam comes in, and Sonny asks if it’s about Kristina. Does Sam want him to back off while she works her con on Shiloh? She does, but that’s not why she’s there. It turns out Shiloh has some influential followers. Sonny says, like who?
Apparently, Willow and Chase have been kissing all weekend, since they’re still at it. She tells him that she doubts Principal Shultz would be thrilled with her making out with her boyfriend there. Chase says detective boyfriend to her. She says she needs to be on her best behavior. She almost got fired. Shiloh would love that, if she crawled back to DOD. Chase says, she would never do that, right? and Willow says, not for any reason.
Alexis arrives at The Floating Rib, and sees Neil, who says he was just leaving. She says, no he isn’t; he just got there. He says he’s making clear boundaries, and she says, who needs boundaries? He tells her they’ll talk at the next session, but she asks if he doesn’t do sessions outside of the office. Why don’t they grab a booth, and he can bill her? He’s not very receptive, and she blurts out, her daughter is in a cult.
Shiloh watches the video of him and Sam. Kristina comes in, and asks what he’s watching.
Maxie tells Peter that her high school crush finally asks her out, and she had to turn him down. Peter asks, why? and she says she’s been excruciatingly obvious. She has feelings for him. For a while, she thought he felt the same way. At their table, Anna says, it’s Peter’s moment, and Finn says, for what? Anna apologizes for ignoring him, and says she and Peter had a real conversation. She thinks he might take her advice. She tells Finn that she’s all his. He nervously drinks some water. There’s something he wants to… Peter tells Maxie that she knows he has feelings for her. She asks, how? and he says he’s told her. She says he hasn’t really, and he says he didn’t think she’d want to hear all that. Maxie says that’s why she’s been spending so much time with him. Peter says he cares for her, so much more than anyone he’s ever cared about before. She asks why he didn’t say so, and he says, why didn’t she? She says he’s the first person she’s felt this way about since Nathan died. She was nervous, and last night, he said they should live their separate lives. He says he thought that’s what she wanted. She asks where that leaves them, and they kiss, practically diving into each other.
Alexis tells Neil that she understands she’s trampled professional boundaries. She should have given him a spoiler alert. She does understand professional distance, but as a mother, she’s freaking out. He says he has a few minutes, and they sit. He tells her, start from the beginning. Alexis says Kristina was born. She was challenging; a lost soul of sorts, drifting. When she found something that spoke to her, a group that did volunteering and self-help, Alexis thought it was great. Then Kristina got more deeply involved, and began to give them more money. They started encouraging her to distance herself from her family. Alexis is worried they’re going to lose her. What should she do? Neil says, nothing.
Maxie says, wow. Finn tells Anna that he was thinking… and sees that she’s mesmerized. She says, she did that. Not to brag, but it’s about time those two had some happiness. Finn agrees, and she says, what was he going to ask her?
Maxie and Peter kiss again. She says, that was nice. He says, really nice, and she says, but that doesn’t answer the question. He says, if she’s ready, he is. He thinks they’d be good together. She says, nowwhat? and he says they could go someplace nice. Maxie says she’s running late, and Lulu comes flying in. She’s glad she caught them. She needed to see them before she leaves Port Charles.
Shiloh tells Kristina that he was reviewing a session. Seeing progress is exhilarating. She tells him, goodnews. She got the money she needs for the Trust. Although she’ll probably be tending bar for the rest of her life. He says, fantastic, and she asks when she gets to meet the others. He says, tonight.
Sonny says Margaux is a member of the DOD cult? Sam doubts she’d call it that, but she’s definitely a follower. Jason says it must have something to do with why she dropped the charges. Shiloh forgave him, and she agreed to drop it. Sam says, Margaux is taking his lead, which explains a lot. Like why her attitude changed. She hated Sam, but now she’s nicer. Sonny says, Margaux has gone through a lot in the last six months. She’s recovering from the ugly truth that her parents weren’t exactly the people she thought they were. Sam says she hasn’t found any concrete evidence yet, but the more time Kristina spends at DOD, the worse it looks. She just wanted to update them. Jason tells her, be careful. She leaves, and Jason tells Sonny that they’re better off eliminating Shiloh now, than dealing with the fallout later.
Lulu tells Maxie and Peter that she’s leaving with Rocco tomorrow. Maxie asks if she’s seeing Dante. She’s heard he was in a secret location, and can’t talk, but Anna is there. Lulu says she doesn’t want to put Anna on the spot, since Anna can’t tell her. And it’s not about Dante. Maybe, in a way. Last year exhausted her; there was so much change. She told herself that she was keeping up, but hasn’t been. She’s been treading water. With the Ryan stuff, Dante gone, then back, then gone again; she needs to reset, and she can’t do that there. Maxie asks how long she’ll be gone, and Lulu says, a week, maybe a month. She’s not putting a timetable on it. She’ll come back when she’s ready. Maxie hates it. She’ll miss Lulu like crazy, but she understands. They hug, and Lulu tells Peter, sorry she’s giving no notice. She’s hoping for a leave of absence. He says he might have to deny her request.
Finn tells Anna that he doesn’t say he loves her enough. She says she loves him too. He’s been thinking about the future. All he sees is her and… Anna says, Robert. Robert sits with them, and says he’s come up with some stuff on Anna’s system.
Alexis says she hopes Neil doesn’t expect her to pay him for that advice. How is doing nothing helpful? He asks how old Kristina is, and Alexis says, twenty-five going on fifteen. He asks if she’s being abused, and Alexis says she isn’t. He says, Kristina is an adult, and can do what she wants. Alexis asks if this is the advice he’d give to someone going to Jonestown, or would he wait until they drank the Kool-Aid? He says he’s worked with families similar situations. The key is to be counter intuitive. Kristina will only resent Alexis more if she sees her as the enemy. Alexis says, and she’ll want to be at DOD even more.
Chase asks if Willow wants to talk about it. He thought everything was fine. She says, it will be. A student’s parents wanted her fired, when she’d thought they were supporting her. He asks what happened, and she says the student is a bright, assertive girl, who was bullying a shy, sensitive boy. She addressed it with the parents, and the stepmother claimed the child did nothing wrong. Her mom and dad were more receptive, and the bullying stopped, but then there was another incident. She caught the same girl copying answers on a test. She went to the parents, and they accused her of being biased. She wants to say, it’s impossible, but the truth is, she doesn’t like the stepmother. She’s a total… difficult. Maybe she jumped to conclusions. It would be totally unfair, and not the kind of teacher or person she wants to be. Chase tells her, it’s possible to recover from inerrant judgement. You have to admit you’re wrong, learn from the experience, and start rebuilding. He says it doesn’t seem so dreadful, but she says it’s not the behavior she wants to model on her job. She wants her students to learn more than reading and math. Fairness, tolerance, and accepting each other’s differences. Chase says it’s cool seeing how passionate she is. Shiloh appears, and says, trust him. She’s always been that way. I call him an a-hole even though he can’t hear me.
Sam sees Kristina reading through the window at DOD, and comes into the house. She asks if Shiloh is there, and Kristina says, he’ll be back soon. He’s taking care of some things for tonight. Sam asks if he’s teaching classes, and Kristina says, it’s a higher level thing. She can’t talk about it. Sam gets it, and tells Kristina that she had a one on one with Shiloh, but it’s not enough. Kristina is glad someone in her family gets it. Sam says Kristina had seemed less than thrilled that she was involved, but Kristina admits she was jealous; a baseline emotion. After tonight, she doesn’t have to worry about her standing in the community. Sam asks, what’s going on tonight?
Robert tells Anna, Boris Makala was an obscure case. It was never digitized, so finding the file took some digging. Anna was the courier. Alex was posing as the girlfriend for a diplomat, and had to be fingerprinted for clearance, so she was in Bern. Anna says Boris lost his life because she froze. Robert says she couldn’t have saved him, but she doesn’t believe it; not then and not now. Alex did her research. She made it sound like she was there. Robert says the DVX gave her the details. He knows Anna will be hard on herself. She says she’s back to square one. She doesn’t know which memories are hers and which are Alex’s. She needs a minute, and steps away from the table.
Maxie asks Peter what’s wrong with him, and Lulu says she needs to regroup. Maxie tells Peter there are statures and laws to protect Lulu, but he says they misunderstood. He wants her to remain on staff. For the last six months, she’s written about the most covered story, and she was personally involved. A lot of people would love to hear about her experience. She asks if he wants a special section in the magazine, but he’s thinking it would make a fascinating book. What better reset than to put it in writing? She says she hasn’t been a reporter that long, but Maxie thinks it’s a great idea. Peter says she can leave it on the page. Lulu says she has a lot to consider, and she has to pack. Maxie says they need a drink. Peter tells them that he’ll get lost, but Lulu’s job is waiting. He hopes she finds the peace she’s looking for. Maxie kisses him, and Lulu is like, wow. Anna watches.
Neil tells Alexis, the key is to plant seeds of doubt, so Kristina will look more critically at DOD. Alexis says that’s a gradual process, and she doesn’t have the luxury of time. Kristina’s father is impatient, and wants to deal with it now, despite any psychological ramifications. Neil asks if Kristina’s father is suggesting kidnapping her.
Shiloh says Willow has a special gift, and calls her Kelly. She says her name is Willow. He pretends he forgot, and says he still thinks of her as Kelly. She’d prefer he not think of her at all. He says, hi, officer, to Chase, and Chase says he’s a detective. Shiloh says if his child is having issues, he suggests bringing them to DOD. They have all kinds of programs, as he’s sure Willow can attest to. Chase says she’s made it clear she doesn’t want to talk to him. He could arrest Shiloh for harassment. Shiloh says he didn’t know her address, and he’s here because he has something that belongs to her.
Sam tells Kristina, it sounds like a big deal. Can Kristina give her a hint? Harmony comes in with Daisy. Kristina introduces herself, saying she’s heard so much about her. Harmony says she’s heard about Kristina too. That’s why she came all this way for tonight. She wonders who Sam is, and Daisy explains she’s Kristina’s sister. Kristina introduces Sam, and Harmony tells her, welcome. She asks Daisy to show her to the attic, so she can get set up for tonight. When they’re gone, Kristina tells Sam that Harmony was one of Shiloh’s first students. Sam says Kristina seems to be a fan, and Kristina says Harmony runs the DOD branch in Beechers Corners.
Jason tells Sonny there might be an investigation or arrests, but they’d have no way to prove anything if Shiloh is gone. Sonny says they need to think about another option before they do something they can’t take back. Why make more trouble for the DA if they don’t have to? Jason says it’s nice having officials in your back pocket, and wonders how long Shiloh’s been pulling her strings. In every town, it’s the same pattern. They’ve influenced the cops, local businesses, and the city council. Sonny says, it’s like taking over a territory. You position everyone to owe you favors. That way, you can run the towns.
Daisy shows Harmony the attic, which looks like a teenager’s room from the 60s. Harmony says, let’s get started.
Alexis says, kidnap is a strong word. Grabbing? Neil says it’s a bad idea, no matter well-intended. Nothing can break the hold on believers. There’s nothing she can do, but there are ways to talk to Kristina; help open her eyes. Alexis tells him, elaborate. She has a lousy track record when it comes to communication with Kristina. He says, don’t disagree. There are subtle ways to get Kristina to see it from the outside. Remind her of the life she had before this. Memories, photos of past events with loved ones. They can talk about the rest in their next session. She thanks him for hearing her out; she appreciates it. He writes on a napkin, and slides it over. She asks, what’s that? and he says, his bill.
Daisy lights candles. Harmony unpacks her bag, and says all they need is Shiloh.
Sam says, so Harmony runs the Beechers Corners branch of DOD, but Kristina says run is the wrong word. It’s more like she represents them. She oversees the classes and outreach. It makes sense, since she had to be in tune with Shiloh to reach that level. Harmony and Daisy come back, and Harmony asks if Kristina will join them in the kitchen. She says she’d like to get to know Sam better, and Sam says she feels the same way. Kristina hopes Sam doesn’t mind, but she has this thing to do. Sam says she loves Kristina. Kristina is glad Sam has an open mind, and loves her too. Sam leaves, and they go into the kitchen. Sam sneaks back in.
Willow says she doesn’t want anything from Shiloh. He says she doesn’t know what he has, and asks Chase for privacy, but Chase says not unless Willow wants him to leave. She wants him to stay, and Shiloh says, very well. He says he was cleaning the attic, and came across this picture of them. He points out how Willow is smiling. She says, pictures can be misleading, but he says, not this one. Look at how happy she was being in the family, and with all the things she trusted him with.
Sonny asks if Jason thinks Shiloh believes his own garbage. Jason says, no; he’s a con. He’s charging for enlightenment, and the higher up you go, the more money he asks for. He’s not getting rich on tuition though, so something else is going on that they’re not seeing; a way to exploit followers and their families.
Sam sneaks up to the attic.
Willow says the place Shiloh is referring to was never her home. He says that’s not what the people she left behind believe. She’s sorely missed. She tells him, please leave, and tries to hand him the photo. He tells her, keep it. Het hopes it inspires her true aptitude. There will always be a place for her at DOD. Perhaps for her students as well. He leaves, and she rips it up. Chase makes sure he’s gone. He asks if she’s okay, and she says she escaped, but he’ll never stop harassing her, now that he knows where she is. He just put on a master class in coercion. What he did when she was part of DOD. There was always free will, or the illusion of it. Shiloh is a master manipulator, who gets people to do whatever he wants, and think it’s their idea.
Peter sees Robert and keeps walking. Robert tells Finn, great. What a joke, forming a relationship with Faison’s son. Finn says they don’t talk about it much. Robert says it’s tough when the past comes back to haunt you. As a civilian, it’s hard to understand. Finn asks if Robert doesn’t have a flight to catch. Robert says if he didn’t trust that Finn has Anna’s best interest at heart, he’d think Finn was trying to get rid of him.
Anna asks if Peter admitted he has feelings for Maxie. He asks her not to say she told him so. She’s just happy that he’s happy, but she thinks she saw it coming when she told him to tell Maxie.
Lulu asks Maxie if she and Peter are officially a thing. Maxie guesses they are, and Lulu says, the kiss looked definite. Maxie says, it’s all new at the moment. She can’t believe Lulu is leaving. Lulu thinks it’s best, and Maxie asks when she’s coming back. Lulu says, soon. If this has shown her anything, it’s that she’s a complete mess if Maxie isn’t in her life. Maxie feels the same way, and they toast to best friends.
Peter tells Anna that he saw her talking to Maxie. Did she tell Maxie the same thing she told him. It’s avery mom thing to do. Anna smiles. He goes back to Maxie and Lulu, and asks if it’s too soon. Lulu says she has to pack. Rocco wants to bring his whole room, and she thinks the negotiations will be noisy. She tells Peter to keep an eye on Maxie or he’ll answer to her. She and Maxie hug.
Anna trusts Robert and Finn are being civil, and Robert says, of course. He’s sorry he couldn’t wrap it up for her, but something significant did come out of it. The memory that was implanted, must be significant enough to Alex that she freed up the file on Boris. Anna says something that carries emotional weight; something Alex doesn’t want to acknowledge to the rest of the world. However it affects Alex’s life, now affects hers.
Willow tells Chase, members are free to leave, but Shiloh convinces them to stay. The entire group bombards them, and most aren’t strong enough. Chase says, most. She got free of him. She tells Chase that she doesn’t think she’ll ever be free of Shiloh or DOD until she rids herself of this, and shows him the tattoo. He asks if it’s from Shiloh, and she says, Shiloh called it a gift, only bestowed those deemed worthy part of special ceremony.
Sonny tells Jason, blackmail his followers. Jason says, think about it. If Sonny offered him $100K to let Kristina go… Sonny says Shiloh would keep charging him. Extortion. Jason says if Sam can get evidence, they might have a chance. Sonny says the DA is a follower, but Jason says the commissioner and the mayor aren’t. There might be a way to get Shiloh legally. The phone rings, and Sonny says, send him in. He says they’ll figure out a different way to help Kristina. There’s a knock at the door, and Sonny thanks him for coming. It’s Neil.
Alexis hopes it’s not too late.
Sam looks in Harmony’s bag, and takes out a tool roll (similar to a jewelry roll), and looks at the instruments. Shiloh comes in downstairs. Sam says, somebody’s getting a tattoo.
Tomorrow, Jordan says that Margaux has closed Ryan’s case, Willow tells Michael that his sister is in more trouble than he knows, and Sonny asks Neil for help in getting his daughter back.
Vanderpump Rules
In Mexico, Scheana and Lala have reserved rooftop time. It’s just them, the pool, and someone to serve them drinks. Lala asks where Kristen was last night. we see clip dancing right now taking selfies. Lala wonders what triggered her on the bus going home, but Scheana doesn’t know. There are times she just hits a breaking In Lala’s interview, she says she’s been anxious her entire life, and sometimes she just gets to a breaking point. Since her dad died, she goes through a list of things her dad won’t be there for, and gets anxious. She tells Scheana that she’s blessed to have them as friends, and Scheana says they’re blessed to have her. They put their heads together as they sit in the pool.
Sitting on their terrace, Stassi says Beau looks sad. He says he’s taking a moment. She says after she has a freakout, she’s always remorseful, but this time, she feels really sad. She doesn’t trust that she won’t get hurt in the long run, or left. Beau says he cried his eyes out. She knows how awful he feels and hates it, but it freaks her the eff out. He shows her the stress hives he’s getting, and says he’s exploding from the stress. In his interview, Beau says Stassi’s freakouts are awful, but 99.9% of the time, they’re good and in love. It’s not ruining their future. He tells her, it’s a process. They’re growing, and he wants to take the steps. He’s being patient because he loves her. He kisses her, and she says she loves him too.
Ariana and the Toms order drinks. Tom tells Ariana about the text from Lisa about the line. He loves she’s never done the velvet rope thing. Ariana says they have one at SUR, but they don’t use it. Schwartz asks if they go through lulls. He makes Katie initiate sex. Ariana says they probably weren’t connecting because he and Tom were involved with the bar. She and Tom have had to make an effort. In his interview, Schwartz says, Katie isn’t needy, but she needs be loved. All that stuff went by the wayside. Schwartz says, every time, once they’re doing it, they say why don’t they do it more often? In his interview, he says he’s going to be Tom Juan, and initiate tonight. He makes a pinky promise with Ariana. She says if he doesn’t follow through, she can cut it off. And she doesn’t mean his pinky.
Pup on the street in a skirt! The staff readies SUR for the evening. Lisa is glad to see Adam there, since so many of them went to Mexico. She asks why he didn’t go, and he says he has bills to pay. She asks if he’s heard from Scheana, and he says, not really. He hasn’t responded or commented on any of her pictures. Lisa says, they’re an item, but Adam tells her not to say that, especially in front of Scheana. He asks if Lisa wants to see a picture Scheana sent, and she says, probably not, but he shows her anyway. It’s the picture of Scheana half-naked with the knife strapped to her leg. He didn’t know what to say, so he didn’t respond. Lisa says, most men would know what to say to that. In Lisa’s interview, she says she would never… well, maybe. She looks down her blouse, and says, it’s there. She wouldn’t let Ken see though. She tells Adam, Scheana hopes for a magical life, and it hasn’t worked out. Welcome to most of our worlds. She says, be kind to her.
Everyone gets ready to go out to eat. The restaurant is beautiful, and they sit at an outside table with an ocean view. Lala starts breathing heavily, and says, here comes the anxiety again. In her interview, she says, anxiety sucks. You don’t know when it’s coming, or what brought it on. You just feel helpless. Brittany holds her hand, and she says, tighter. Stassi asks if she’s okay. Ariana offers to eat everyone’s pickled onions. Ariana points out Kristen is having a nip slip, but she says it’s a bruise; Carter bit her. Tom says, one make-out session, and Ariana and Kristen are friends. Scheana touches Lala’s face. In his interview, Jax says he’s never had friends pat him down. Stassi tells Lala that they’ve done a lot of partying, and she hadn’t been doing that. Lala wants to know if she looks like she’s in a fog. She needs Stassi to judge her. In Stassi’s interview, she says this is borderline uncomfortable, over the top, and dramatic. She tells Lala that she’s fine.
Katie and Schwartz go to the bar, along with Jax and Brittany. Jax asks for the finest ice water they have. In Brittany’s interview, she says she’s lucky to have a fiancé who wants her to be healthy and happy. Ariana, Scheana, and Kristen hang out by the pool. In bed with Beau, Stassi tells him that she loves him more than ranch dressing. Ariana says Lala is in their room.
On the phone with her mother, Lala says her emotions not being managed is torture.
Tom asks Ariana, what happened? and Ariana tells him that Lala had anxiety attack. In Tom’s interview, he says, Lala wanted everybody’s hands on her, like she was being healed at some Baptist church. He’s sure Randal gives her a lot of attention, but he’s not there, so she wants it from everyone else.
Scheana says Lala was very vocal, and complains that everyone has always treated Lala like she can do no wrong. Scheana says she wasn’t the one Lala was making out with last night, but when Lala needs her, she’s there. Kristen says she’s hypersensitive to everyone (referring to herself). If she knows someone is upset, she’ll be up their ass. Scheana thinks Lala is selfish.
Lala takes to the bed and baby bottle.
Katie comes into the room, following a path of rose petals and candy, finding bags of snack foods, more rose petals, and Schwartz on the bed. She asks, what is this? and he says, romance. It’s the ultimate romantic heist. We see a clip of him on the phone, ordering Doritos and beef jerky. In his interview, Schwartz says there are more conventional methods of setting the mood – Viagra, Spanish Fly – but he did something more mature. We see him telling a violinist, the cue will be meow, and stashing her in the shower. He tells us two of Katie’s favorite things are music and junk food. He’s going to steal Katie’s heart. He meows, and the violinist begins to play. In Katie’s interview, she says, it took a minute to understand wtf was going on. She’s touched by Schwartz’s beautiful, sweet, romantic gesture. They thank the musician, and she leaves. In Schwartz’s interview, he says his name is Tom Juan, and he is the world’s greatest lover. He asks if Katie wants to make a baby.
Kristen tries to figure out the hammock. She texts Ariana that she’s effing tired. Still in bed, Tom says Ariana must have left a lasting impression. In her interview, Ariana says the friendship slowly developed over time. It was like a plant. You plant a seed, water it sometimes, you’re not really paying attention, and then you have zucchini.
Scheana asks if Lala is feeling anxious today, but she’s ready to be home. Scheana wonders if she’ll be okay to go to the airport.
Schwartz feels like he has Dorito cologne on. Ariana has a bottle of Tabasco in her purse. In her interview, Kristen says the trip shows how much she’s grown. Sayonara to crazy Kristen, and hellomariposa. Brittany asks about Jax friends list for the engagement party. She reads what she has, and Jax blanks out. In his interview, he says, the engagement party is going to cost more than the wedding. He wants Brittany to be happy, but doesn’t want to be poor. She says she has to ask again; is he calling his mom and inviting her? He says, no; not for this. In his interview, Jax says he feels empty about his mom. They’ve barely spoken since his dad passed. Brittany doesn’t want him to regret any decisions, and says, this is where it gets tricky. James is out, so Raquel is too, but she doesn’t know what to do about Billie. Jax says he doesn’t like some of the things she pulled with some of his friends, so no. Brittany doesn’t want any hiccups.
Everyone heads to LAX.
James and Raquel meet Billie at Vanderpump Dogs. They’re bringing Graham to get cleaned up before his puppy shower. In his interview, James says, we’re havinga pawty – get it? They’re having it catered, and even get a tasting for the puppy hors d’oeuvres. James can’t do it, but Raquel says the icing is good; peanut butter. In his interview, James is hoping they can rekindle some friendships. Everyone in the group can agree on their love for puppies. Billie tells them she’s having a white party at SUR, and is going to ask Lisa if James can DJ. She was okay with the brunch, although there was craziness. James says, Lalawas the craziness. Billie says Lala almost hit her, and Raquel says she thought Lala was going to poke her in the eye. Billie says they want to get James pissed off, so he’ll be fired forever. Raquel agrees, and Billie asks who Lala thinks she is; she’s literally a bully. Billie uses literally as a filler word, and doesn’t realize it makes her sound illiterate. James says Lala will screw over anyone in her path, but she’s going to push it too far. Billie says, she’s the ultimate mean girl.
Back at work, Jax says he hasn’t pooped in four days. Thank you for sharing. Katie says they all have the major sh*ts. An even better picture. Thanks again. Jax wonders why Tom is there. In Tom’s interview, he says he and Lisa never talked about the transition. If he’s on the schedule, he shows up for his shift. He tells Jax that TomTom doesn’t feel the same way. He likes working at SUR.
Schwartz goes to TomTom, and talks with manager Leo. In his interview, Schwartz says he has a new zest and excitement about his career. It’s like he’s having an out of body experience, watching himself work the crowd. He tells Leo that Tom is over at SUR, working.
Raquel sees Brittany at SUR, and invites her and Jax to the puppy shower. She explains she and James want to celebrate Graham joining their family. In Jax’s interview, he says, nothing is going on up there. She knows Jax might not want to come, but hopes he will, or at least Brittany. Jax says everyone in the group is in a great mood, and they’re all getting along. If it was just her, he’d come. Brittany says she’s not comfortable what happened. We flash back to James rapping about Jax screwing Faith. Raquel says, not her too; she’s shocked. She thought at least Brittany would want to go. Jax tells her congratulations on her new dog though. She looks so eager and desperate, it really is sad.
Lisa arrives at Sur, looking fabulous in black and white. Hostess Lala tells her, hello, queen. Lala is wearing a top that’s like a tube top with straps, and Lisa says, it’s not a strip club; it’s a restaurant. She tells Lala to put on a SUR T-Shirt. Lala says this bums her out, but Lisa says it’s not appropriate attire. I could understand this more if they hadn’t had uniform dresses during the first season that barely covered their asses.
Lisa asks Billie how it’s going; she looks like the cat who swallowed the canary. Billie says she’s doing a white party on Saturday, and would like James to DJ. Lisa says she doesn’t know if that’s a good idea, and Billie says Lala acted crazy, and attacked James at the brunch. Lisa says she’s made so many allowances for James already. In her interview, Lisa says she made it clear that if James wanted to work there, he had to be 100% sober, and he’s not. She tells Billie that she’d prefer another DJ. Billie whines that James brings amazing energy. Lala comes out wearing a SUR T-shirt, albeit still showing her midriff. She asks if it’s better, and Lisa says, better. Lala returns to hostessing, and Billie says Lala gets to run around half-naked, and be a bitch, while she’s gone through a lot of sh*t. Lisa tells her to tone it down. Billie says she needs to breathe because she’s effing pissed off. Lisa again tells her to shush. Billie stomps off, and Lisa follows her. She tells Billie not to talk to her like that, using the F-bomb. She’s the decision-maker, not Billie. She can’t swear, storm off, and have a temper tantrum. She’s done nothing but support Billie. Billie tries dragging Lala into it again, but Lisa say she’s dealing with what she’s seeing right now. Billie asks if Lisa wants her to just smile and say yes, and Lisa says, exactly. These people tend to forget they’re at work, and also in front of customers. Lisa tells her, especially when she has this in her hand, indicating the menu. She tells Billie to have manners and close her mouth. She asks if they understand each other. Billie nods her head, and goes back to work
Brittany asks Scheana about Adam. Scheana says he was at the apartment when she got home. He gave her the biggest and longest hug. He got a leg cramp (it wasn’t clear if this was related to the hug), and he had to use her foam roller, so of course she took a video. Brittany tells her that they invited Adam to the engagement party. Scheana asks about Billie, and Brittany says, Jax said no. Scheana says they want people there who make them happy. They don’t want what happened at hers. Brittany asks, what happened? and Scheana says Tom punched Jax. We flash back to that. Scheana hopes that’s the only engagement party Brittany will have, but hopefully she’ll get another.
Beau and Stassi meet Ariana at TomTom.
Billie tells Scheana about Lisa about James not being allowed to DJ. Scheana says she likes James, but she had to learn to separate that from her relationships with these people, if she wanted to be part of the group. She doesn’t want Billie to be excluded, like she is from Brittany and Jax’s engagement party. Jax said she reminded them of James (what? that’s not what I heard). Billie says that’s like high school. So is the entire show, but we’ll let that pass. She did nothing wrong to them. She hopes Scheana stood up for her, since she’s stood up non-stop for Scheana when she was disrespected. Scheana says she’s trying to help Billie. She doesn’t want her to feel like this. Billie wonders who wouldn’t invite someone just because of their association with another person. He’s not her child or brother. He’s a co-worker who she loves and supports. I’m just going to say it. Billie isn’t the brightest bulb in the box, although part of her constant indignation might be to get screen time. Oh never mind. That pretty much covers a lot of the cast.
Billie wants to talk to Brittany. Of course she does. Because you always confront someone about personal stuff when you’re both in the middle of a work day. She tells Brittany that Scheana said they didn’t want to invite her to the engagement party because she was connected with James. Brittany says, it’s not that they don’t want her to come for that reason. When she talked to Jax, he didn’t think she was trustworthy. He didn’t think it was a good idea. In her interview, Brittany says, when it comes to a $75 a plate event, they have to go by who they like. Jax put the ax on it, and he’s her fiancé. She tells Billie that they don’t want fighting. Billie says she and James aren’t a couple, but Brittany says that’s not how it was. Billie says she has love for Brittany, and Brittany says she does for her too. Still not getting it, Billie asks, then why isn’t she included. Brittany says there’s so much tension there already, and there are some people Billie doesn’t get along with. Brittany doesn’t want that with her family coming in. All teary, Billie hugs her. In Brittany’s interview, she says she had to tell Raquel no to her face about not going to her puppy party. Then she had Billie asking why she wasn’t invited to the engagement party. This is the absolute [sic] worst day ever.
Raquel stops by TomTom to invite them to the puppy shower. Stassi asks what that is, and Raquel says it’s like a baby shower. Stassi says that happens before the baby is born. Stassi wonders if she’s serious, and Raquel hands her a flyer that’s actually kind of cute. She says they’ll be playing games like pin the tail on the puppy. In Stassi’s interview, she says she’d rather light one of her arms on fire. No amount of alcohol could make something like a puppy shower fun. Actually, if everyone brought their dogs, it could be a lot of fun. Certainly more fun than a human shower, baby or wedding, which isn’t much, unless it’s yours. Stassi says she’s not going to James’s puppy shower after what happened. In her interview, Raquel says it sucks that James is affecting her relationship with them. She was hoping they could put things aside, and celebrate Graham. Raquel tells Stassi that she understands why James acts this way. Stassi says she sounds like the woman who wanted to marry Charles Manson. Raquel doesn’t know who that is. Maybe there is nothing upstairs. Obviously, she’s way too young to have been around when that happened, but for the love of all that’s holy, it’s not like he hasn’t been in the news in the past couple of years, and there is that Tarantino movie coming out.
Lisa asks what Tom doing at SUR, and he says he was on the schedule. She says he’s got responsibilities at TomTom. He says he likes working at SUR once in a while. In her interview, Lisa says, he needs to be at TomTom.It’s his new baby; he needs to nurture it. She says she’ll make the decision for him. He’s fired. He asks if she’s serious, and she says, 1000%. In Tom’s interview, he says he literally grew up at SUR. When he started, he was a kid. Flashbacks accompany what he’s saying. Then he began dating Ariana. He’s gotten in fights in the back. There was the ambush. He feels like his DNA is in the walls. He’s worked great Prides. Lisa says, gotta keep moving forward.
Tom and Lisa go to TomTom. Tom tells Schwartz that Lisa just fired him. Lisa says, time to give it up. His name is on the outside. She’s been there running things while they were in Mexico, and she sees success. She says he wants to be a partner; part of it. She asks the Toms, what constitutes a partner? They come up with attitude, commitment, and professionalism, but she asks how it starts – with investment. She tells them the checks both bounced. Tom’s went through, but Schwartz’s bounced. Schwartz says that account isn’t active, and she wishes he’d told her before she cashed the check. He says it was just a technicality, and jokes that he still has a little. Lisa asks how she knows he’s good for it, and he suggests a pinky swear. In Lisa’s interview, she says boyish mannerisms can be cute, but when bouncing a check, cuteness doesn’t work. She says she even told him she was putting it in the company account. We flash back, and yes, she did. She tells him that she’ll be back Tuesday. In his interview, Tom says when you’re partnering, and the money doesn’t come through, it’s a bad look.
James listens to his own music in his car outside TomTom. Raquel gets in, and he asks how it went. She says, not that great. She didn’t expect Jax to come, but Brittany said she’s not coming because of James. Stassi too. He asks if she tried to sell the idea to them, and she says she told them everything. He says flyers aren’t cheap, and she says it’s sucky for her. She’s trying make new friendships with these people, but they want nothing to do with her because of him. He says, whoever wants to come, can come, and whoever doesn’t, screw them. He’s over it. It’s their loss. They are now uninvited.
Next time, Jax finds out in therapy that Brittany still doesn’t totally trust him, James discovers he won’t be DJ at the white party, Stassi contacts a spirit, and Schwartz brings Lisa cash.
⌚ I Still Don’t Know Where It Goes…
Like the Ghost of Christmas Present said, and suddenly you’re not there anymore. Or it’s 4 am. I added that last part.
What I Watched - TV With Theresa 