Tag Archives: television

Apr22

April 21, 2017 – Carly Declares War, Camelot Crumbles & Don’t Call Ronda Fat

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Dante goes to Alexis’s place and Sam answers the door. He tells her that he wants to ask Alexis some follow-up questions.

Ava sees Julian in the interrogation room. He says the sooner she gets him out the better. She says the last time she was there, he refused to help her. She wants a good reason why she shouldn’t return the favor.

Elizabeth wonders what Jake is hiding, and if he’s really afraid of Jason.

Jason hopes this year is better than the last, and Sonny says it couldn’t be worse. He says as soon as Jax is gone, he can work on it. Jason asks why he thinks Jax would be going anywhere.

He thinks so because the immigration officer tells Jax his visa has been revoked. He says Jax was arrested for a crime of moral turpitude. He was alleged to be involved in organ trafficking, and that’s enough to start deportation proceedings. Jax tells Carly his attorney will clear it up, and goes with the officer. Carly says she’ll clear it up.

Jason says that Sonny did something, and he probably doesn’t want to know. Elizabeth calls and asks Jason to come over; something is up with Jake. Jason tells Sonny to be careful how he plays this thing with Carly, and don’t do something he can’t take back.

Julian tells Ava that he’s been running from their demented sister. Ava asks if he has any idea what he put her through. The only reason she’s still alive is that Dante arrested her, and the only person who knew the truth did nothing to stop it. Julian says Olivia was threatening his family, and what would she have done if it was Kiki? Ava flashes back to switching the pills. She says a Jerome does whatever they have to do to protect their own. Julian asks if she’s going to help him, and Scotty comes in. He says it’s good to see Julian among the living. He got him acquitted when he was facing the trifecta of felonies, and he’ll do it again.

Dante tells Sam that Julian confessed to holding Alexis hostage. Alexis overhears, and thinks about getting busy with Julian. Sam says she’ll get Alexis to the station, and Dante leaves. Alexis thanks Sam for the save. Sam says she’s not off the hook with her questions though, and asks what she and Julian did last night. Really?

Jason arrives at Elizabeth’s place. She tells him that Jake has been talking to Franco about his sessions. She shows Jason the timeline, saying that Jake left it at the studio. Jason asks if the boy in the drawing is supposed to be Jake, and that he must be hiding from the scarecrow. Elizabeth tells him about Jake being scared of him.

Sam doesn’t have a problem believing that Julian might kidnap Alexis, but wonders why he’d take her to a hotel room. She wants the truth. Kristina and Molly walk in. They’ve brought food and DVDs. Molly says it’s all about the Davis women today. Sam tells Alexis they’re not done with the conversation.

Scotty tells Ava she has to leave. Ava tells Julian that despite his recent disloyalty, she loves him.

Carly storms into Sonny’s house and accuses him of trying to have Jax deported.

Elizabeth says she and Jake ran into Franco at the hospital. She tells Jason about Jake not wanting them to see the scarecrow. Jake walks in.

Sam interrupts the Davis women’s viewing pleasure to tell everyone that Alexis has to make a statement at the station. Kristina says everyone knows what Julian did, and wonders why Alexis has to be put through it again. She says that Julian does whatever it takes to save himself.

Ava sees Dante at the station. They talk about Julian being alive  – Dante calling it the miracle they’ve all been waiting for – and Dante tells Ava she can get her stuff back from the robbery. He still wonders how Morgan’s pills ended up at The Floating Rib. Ava says it’s one of life’s mysteries, and Dante thinks Sonny won’t rest until he gets the truth.

Sonny tells Carly that unfortunately, Jax broke the law, so he can be deported. Carly says it’s all about payback, and asks if he stopped to think about Josslyn. He says they’re not going to hold Jax at some detention center; he’ll go back to Australia on a nice plane, and she can visit when she wants. Carly tells him that’s her daughters father, and if Jax suffers the consequences, so will Sonny, and believe her, they’ll be consequences.

Molly is worried about Alexis, but she says she’s fine. She tells them there’s more to the situation than they know. She says she’s confused, and Molly wonders if she’s defending Julian again. Alexis says his motives are complex. Molly says he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. Alexis tells them that she’s more tired than she realized, and was hoping this was over. Sam asks the other girls to give Alexis some breathing room. They leave, and Alexis says she shouldn’t have said that. Sam asks because of Kristina or Julian. She tells Alexis that it’s probably easier to tell the truth, and that Julian didn’t hold her hostage. Alexis admits that he didn’t.

Scotty tells Julian that he shouldn’t have said he kidnapped Alexis. Julian says it doesn’t matter; all they have to do is question Alexis. Scotty says she has so many skeletons in her closet, he just has to pick one to discredit her. Julian tells him that Alexis has been hurt enough, and Scotty can’t use her in the defense. After He’s cleared, he’s leaving Port Charles. Scotty says as his attorney, he thinks Julian should take a plea bargain, and he’s going to spend a long time in Pentenville.

Carly wanted to take the high road, but Sonny took the first shot, so now it’s war. She says she’s going to win, and he says they’ll see. She tells him to enjoy his birthday – alone. She reminds him about last year and how they celebrated with the family, and how close they were. She says it’s amazing what a difference a year makes.

Elizabeth says Jason dropped by for a visit. She goes to get something from the kitchen, and Jason asks how school is. Jake says boring, and Jason talks about summer coming. He brings up the action figures and says what he discusses with Andre is private, but if there’s anything he wants to talk about, he can always talk to him. Jake says he knows, and Jason says he has the feeling he’s afraid of him. Jake says Jason isn’t the one he’s scared of. Jason asks who Jake is afraid of, but he sees Elizabeth. Jason says he’s afraid of someone, but it wasn’t him. Jason thinks he knows what’s going on.

Alexis tells Sam that when she saw the park photo, she went to the pier to find closure, but found Julian instead. She felt relieved, and went with him. When everyone showed up, he said she was his hostage so she wouldn’t be implicated. She has to live with that. Sam says she should bring Diane along when she makes her statement. She can confirm the lie, or implicate herself.

Julian says there must be something Scotty can do. Scotty says that Julian was only an accessory, and then he admitted to kidnapping Alexis all on his own. He has nothing up his sleeve, unless Julian wants to recant. Julian says he did what he did, and he’s the only one who should pay for it.

Dante visits Sonny. He gives him the bottle of pills. In what looks like a repurposed Twizzlers bag. Sonny asks if the case is closed, and Dante says as of this morning. They have zero leverage, since the robbers took a plea bargain. Sonny wonders how the pills ended up at the restaurant, and Dante says he does too. Sonny asks if there’s something Dante isn’t saying.

Scotty tells Ava that Julian is going to be the death of him. Ava says they have bigger problems, and that Dante was taunting her. Scotty says he took care of that, and she has nothing to worry about. Ava says whether there’s lithium or breath mints in it, Sonny will want to know why the pills were at The Floating Rib.

Sonny doesn’t understand how Morgan’s pills could be there six months later. Dante says it doesn’t seem likely. Sonny says that Carly was convinced there was something going on. She thought maybe Morgan wasn’t taking the medication, and they were going to get to the bottom of it. He says they were a great team, and it’s amazing how things change.

Carly finds Jax there when she gets home. She tells him that Sonny is the one who tipped them off. He says it doesn’t matter; they were within their rights to detain him until he goes home. They agreed to let him go, providing he leaves the country tonight and never returns.

Sam tells Scout she’s worried about her grandmother because she’s in love with Julian. She says normally loving someone would be okay, but she’s not sure about this.

Alexis gets to the station. She sees Julian. They stare at each other, making soap opera faces.

Carly tells Jax that it doesn’t make any sense; it wouldn’t hold up in court. He says there’s no case to argue. He’ll appeal, but it will take a long time. He wants her and Josslyn to come to Australia with him. I’m in.

Sonny says Morgan wrote in his journal that the pills weren’t working, and Carly wanted to know why. Then they could stop blaming themselves. Dante says Morgan was sick; there was nothing they could do to change that. Sonny says he should have seen what was going on from the beginning. Dante has to do police business. He tells Sonny happy birthday. Sonny looks at the bottle of pills. I swear there were more in it when Ava switched them.

Scotty says that Sonny will find medication in the bottle, and Ava asks where he got them. Scotty tells her a pharmacy where he has a friend. Ava asks what if the friend talks. Scotty says that Sonny will find lithium prescribed for Morgan in the bottle. Ava says there’s no reason for Sonny to look further.

Sonny makes a call. He needs to see someone about his son.

Elizabeth sits on the couch with Jake and Jason, showing Jake a photo album. They look at a picture of him as a baby and one of Elizabeth when she first met Jason. Elizabeth asks Jake if he recognizes someone, and he looks freaked out.

Tomorrow, Alexis makes her statement, Olivia-F visits Julian, and the Quartermaines can only protect Samira for so long.

👑 I watched the miniseries The Kennedys: After Camelot on Reelz, and it was excellent. The casting was spot on, and Katie Holmes is surprisingly good as Jackie. I absolutely loved the wardrobe and sets too, but there’s one gripe I had – the actresses’ foreheads. As I’m watching Ted Kennedy (Matthew Perry) talk to Joan (Kristen Hager) about running for president, all of a sudden, I’m thinking that she looks awfully youthful for what her age should be. Then I take a better look, and realize that the actress must be doing Botox. Now that I’ve noticed this, it’s like trying not to think about elephants, and I’m looking at all of their foreheads.

That being said, this was a wonderful trip down Kennedy Memory Lane. I love the time period, because I grew up on the fringes of it. I was quite small when all this was happening, but loved celebrity gossip early in life, and later on, lived in NYC during the same time period as Jackie and John, although we never crossed paths that I know of. The ending was like a knife in my heart, leaving me to wonder if the dream really did die when John did. Many people obviously put a lot of work into this miniseries, and I applaud their efforts.

Quotes of the Week

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. – Albert Einstein

She’d change her name to “TV Listings” just to get it in the paper. — Donald Sutherland as Bob Garvin in Disclosure

I swear to God, if anyone calls me fat one more time in my life, I’m going to kill them. — Ronda Rousey, the New York Times, October 2015

PeaceLoveEarth

Apr21

April 20, 2017 – Jax is Sprung, Sushi is Made & Judge Judy Says It All

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Elizabeth tells Jason that it was a productive follow-up with Andre, and Jason agrees. They talk about presenting a united front. Jason says they won’t let anyone or anything get in the way of Jake’s progress.

Franco tells Kiki that he thinks Jake is in serious trouble.

Tracy tells Finn that she needs a DNA test. He passes for a friend in her life, and she needs someone she can trust. He asks who it’s for.

An immigration officer comes to the door at the Quartermaine mansion. He tells Monica that he’s looking for Samira, whose visa has expired. He asks if she’s there.

Michael tells Sonny that Jax is being released. Sonny says he wasn’t even in there ten minutes. He wonders why Jax is getting off scot-free.

Carly says Nelle might want to believe she’s a better person, but she’ll destroy what she loves most, so don’t try loving Michael. She knows the real Nelle, and sees her coming. She’ll do whatever it takes to stop her. Nelle asks when it’s going to be enough, and Carly says never. She tells Nelle to get it through her head, and stay away from her son.

Finn tells Tracy that he’s been suspended and is on probation. If he orders a questionable DNA test, he’s finished. Tracy wonders what happened to the renegade that she liked. Finn says he took drugs and got caught. Tracy says he owes her a favor.

Franco tells Kiki that Jake is paralyzingly afraid.

Michael says Sonny should be thankful. Jason walks in and asks what they’re talking about. Because being nosy is the main occupation in Port Charles. Sonny brings him up to speed about Jax. Michael says Jax was arrested in front of Carly and Josslyn, but he’s been released. Maybe Carly can forgive Sonny in fifty years. He tells Sonny that the people most affected are Avery and Josslyn, and he’s not looking at the big picture. Sonny says Avery is a baby, and Michael says she’s going to notice Carly isn’t around. He’s decides to go to the station.

Nelle tells Carly that Michael didn’t get his compassion from her. Carly says she’s happy Nelle is doing right by Jax, but it doesn’t absolve her. She used Morgan’s death to mess with Carly, and she can’t forgive that. Jax walks out and thanks Nelle. He says he’s sorry for everything.  He tells Nelle his offer of help for a fresh start is always on the table. She says Port Charles is home to her now, and she’s not going anywhere.

Monica tells the officer that she has a lot of security, and if someone was on the grounds, she’d know. He asks if he can look around, and she asks if he has a warrant. He wonders why he’d need one, and says if she’s harboring a fugitive, she’ll be charged. He leaves, and Dillon says that was intense. Samira thanks Monica. Dillon says she just made the entire house complicit, and what do they do when Officer Stick-in-the-Mud comes back?

Tracy tells Finn about all the things she’s done for him.  He reminds her that he once saved her life. She says she needs his help again. He asks what’s so important, and she says it involves her family.

Franco tells Kiki that the drawing is more than a scarecrow to Jake. He tells her about Jake losing it over his parents knowing. He says he must be scared of Jason. Kiki asks if he’s more interested in helping Jake or in Jason being the bad guy? He says helping Jake. Kiki asks if he’s talked to Elizabeth, but he says no. Elizabeth appears, and says the usual – talk to her about what?

Jason tells Sonny that the harder it is on Jax, the harder it will be on Sonny. Sending him to prison isn’t the answer, and Carly won’t be happy. He says Sonny is lucky. Jason has come bearing scotch, and wishes Sonny a happy birthday. He tells Sonny that Julian is alive, and he’s been arrested.

Samira thanks Monica again. Dillon wonders who tipped him off. Samira says the monks wouldn’t have done it. She only came because she was desperate, and had no ill intent. She wonders if it was Tracy, since she doesn’t want to part with the painting.

Tracy explains about the painting to Finn. She says while her father was in hiding, he found it. In typical fashion, he gave and took away in the same breath. She tells Finn that she has a sneaking suspicion that Samira is Edward’s illegitimate daughter. She repeats Samira’s story, but says she doesn’t think Samira knows that they might be related. Tracy says she doesn’t want to give up the painting.

Kiki tells Elizabeth that they were talking about the Nurses Ball, and Franco wants to perform again. He says he caught the bug. Elizabeth asks Kiki about her classes, and they make small talk. Kiki says she’ll see Franco at home, and goes back to work. Or whatever she does. Elizabeth says they weren’t talking about the Nurses Ball, and Franco admits that they weren’t.

Jason tells Sonny at least they can be sure Julian will stay behind bars. His excuse that his sister made him do it isn’t going to fly in court. Sonny says Carly slept with Jax, and any chance he gets to make Jax’s life miserable, he’s taking it. Jason suggests he leave Jax alone. Sonny says when Jason is right, he’s right. Which is usually the kind of thing Sonny says before he does what he wants.

Michael sees Nelle at the station. Nelle says they wanted her statement about Jax, and Michael offers to pay her to keep quiet. She sees Jax and Carly come in, says she’s good, and jets.

Michael says Josslyn must be relieved, and asks Jax how he pulled it off. Jax says Nelle refused to say anything. Carly says that Nelle did one decent thing, and it’s the least she owes them. She tells Michael that Sonny threw Jax to the wolves for something he would have done himself. Michael says even if she wants to tear his head off, for his sisters’ sakes, don’t be so focused on getting back at him. Jax thinks they should call a truce, but Carly says she’ll have to think about it.  Carly and Jax leave.

Jason says Julian is finally getting what he deserves. Sonny says he’ll believe it when he sees it. Sonny sends Jason to the kitchen for ice, and calls someone. He needs a favor.

Elizabeth asks what Franco and Kiki were really talking about. Franco wants to tell her, but doesn’t want to betray Jake’s trust again. She loves that he’s devoted, but says he’s not betraying Jake by keeping his mother informed. She tells him about the meeting with Andre. Franco says Jake is never going to be comfortable if he’s afraid of his father.

Finn says Tracy has a first world problem, whereas Samira has a third world problem. Tracy says it’s not hers to fix. Finn says it is, and Tracy says only if she’s telling the truth. She says her father only left her a jar of relish in his will, and she thought he didn’t love her. She was wrong, and asks if she’s a bad person for wanting to keep the painting. Finn says Samira needs it, and if she’s really Tracy’s sister… Tracy says that’s where he comes in. He asks how she wants it to turn out, and she says she doesn’t want them to be related.

Dillon and Monica agree that it wasn’t Tracy who alerted the officer. Dillon asks Samira if she can think of anyone else, but she can’t. Monica wants to extend Samira’s visa, but Samira says she has to take the painting home. She can’t lose her daughter to those monsters.

Tracy says it’s not that she doesn’t want to take on Samira’s problems, but it means her father cheated while they were grieving him. She doesn’t want to be related to Samira, solve the human trafficking problem, or give away the painting. When she read her father’s letter, everything was all right with the world. She’ll come up with money for Samira to rescue her daughter some other way. The painting means everything – it’s changed her perspective. Finn asks what she has, and she gives him the glass. She says she’s not going to beg, but she’s asking him to help her.

Franco tells Elizabeth that she saw how upset Jake was when he’d shown her and Jason the drawing. He wanted to apologize to Jake, and Jake totally lost it. He didn’t want his parents to know about the scarecrow, but Elizabeth had already seen it. He’s afraid of Jason

On the phone, Sonny says to tell him when it’s done. Jason joins him again. Sonny asks how Sam is doing concerning Julian. Jason says she’s worried about Alexis. He says Julian is going away for a long time, and Sonny toasts to the legal system. Ha-ha!

Carly and Jax get home. She says she can’t believe Sonny did that. She says it’s a cheap shot just after Jax’s mother died. She understands there’s no love lost between them, but he didn’t think about anyone else. Jax says he did what he did, and the only reason he’s not in jail is because of Nelle. As far as fallout goes, it’s minor. He points out no charges were filed, and their daughter is alive and well. Carly tells him he’s right. She apologizes to him. She says the whole mess with Sonny is because he was lashing out at her. She asks if there’s anything she can do for him, and he says there is something.

Nelle is waiting for the ferry, and Michael sees her. He asks why she didn’t tell him at the station. She didn’t see the point, since he’d already made up his mind about her. He thanks her for not having Jax prosecuted, and says he’s sorry he misjudged her.

Samira asks if Monica has daughters. Monica says she had two, but they’re no longer with her. She says she’s going to find a way to get Samira out of the country with the painting.

Finn tells Tracy that he’ll do it, but if he loses his medical license or Hayden – explaining that he’s already lost her, but if he gets her back and loses her again – he’s going to be very, very angry for a long, long, long time.

Franco tells Elizabeth that this is real. For some reason, Jake doesn’t want Jason to see the scarecrow. She says Jason is a good father – kind, patient, and devoted. Whatever Jake is feeling isn’t true. Franco says that it is for him, and it’s keeping him from saying what happened on the island.

Sonny babbles about pouring his heart out to Carly, and Jax coming downstairs buttoning up his shirt. He says Jax needs to stay out of it. He needs to get out of the country. Yep. I just put two and two together. Phone call needing a favor + Sonny’s animosity toward Jax.

Michael tells Nelle that he was wrong to think the worst. She asks if he’s always been this fair, and wishes she could think that clearly. A seagull poops on her (I’m not kidding), and Michael helps clean it off, saying it’s good luck. She says she’ll take what she can get. The ferry comes, and they wish each other a good day. I wonder why it’s not nighttime already. Longest. Day. Ever.

Jax wants to go snow camping. Carly says cozy is the snow being outside. He tells her that they’re going to forage for twigs and berries, and she says that’s not happening. He says she’d probably be the one to fight off a bear and survive, and we all think about Erica Kane. The doorbell rings, and Officer Stick-in-the-Mud asks for Jax. He wants Jax to come with him immediately. Honestly, I don’t think this is how any of that works.

Tomorrow, Julian wants a favor from Ava, the immigration officer tells Jax that he’s no longer welcome in this country, and Sam asks Alexis what happened between her and Julian.

🍣 Tonight, on MasterChef Junior, Chef Edward Lee was a guest judge. He rocks! I was also impressed with his rodeo-style shirt. The first challenge was for the contestants to make a dish inspired by their families. The presentations alone were enough to make the average cook hang up their spatula. Next was replicating a sushi platter. Not like Captain Picard replicates things; they actually had to put it together. Presentation here went from “a nightmare on a plate” to Chef Lee being astounded that a thirteen and eleven-year-old could create such amazing sushi. It’s okay, kids who went home, even though your sushi platter was a mess, I couldn’t have even gotten the rice to stick together. Next time the thrills and spills from past seasons, along with, where are they now?

🍤 The f Word starts on May 31st.

👌 I’m With Her

If people had lives, they wouldn’t have so much time to spend being nasty on the internet. – Judge Judy (I’m paraphrasing, but that’s pretty much what she said.)

Apr20

April 19, 2017 – Conscious Coupling & Un in PC, NYC’s Wives Invade the Hamptons & Some Extra Stuff

Posted on by
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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Jordan’s knight in shining armor, Curtis, arrives. He tells her the armor is spiritual. He has something amazing in mind, and holds up a leather bag.

Tracy mulls over Samira giving her Edward’s journal. There’s nothing in it to explain why Samira’s mother had it. Tracy looks into a box, and takes out a carrying case that says ELQ on it. Monica startles her, saying she knows what Tracy is doing, and to be honest for everyone’s sake.

Brad hassles Finn. He says Finn should have been booted from the hospital. Finn tells him to take it to Monica. Brad says he only got off the hook because he donated the money to the hospital. Finn gets the glory, while Brad is out of a condo. Finn suggests Brad repeat everything while he does this – and walks away. He runs into Griff, who says he’s Finn’s new supervisor.

Michael asks Sonny if he’s still thinking about going to South America. He says Sonny should leave Port Charles immediately, before the mess he made gets worse.

At the station, Carly tells Jax that Josslyn wants her to help with anything possible, so she’s gotten him an attorney. She opens the door to the interrogation room, and Nelle is there.

Tracy asks Monica how she’s not being honest. Monica says she’s grieving for her father all over again. Tracy says it’s time to face the ugly truth; Monica has learned how to read her. She says she’s trying to prove things in her own way. Samira appears, and thanks them for putting her up for the night. Tracy says she’s thought of new possibilities. Samira thinks she’s rethinking the painting, but Tracy explains that it can be traced back to her because she declared it with customs. She says even if it was possible, she’s not giving up her father’s legacy.

Hayden looks at a picture of her and Finn on her phone.

Griff is responsible for Finn’s drug testing. He says he’s not judging, and he’s there for Finn. Finn says he gets it. Griff has the thankless job of watching while he pees in a cup, but he doesn’t have to share his feelings; he doesn’t need a priest. Brad acts all skanky, listening from around the corner.

Michael tells Sonny that Jax was incarcerated overnight. He says Sonny put the whole thing in motion. Sonny says that Jax did that a long time ago, and now he has to pay.

Nathan tells Carly that Nelle has to make a statement. Nelle says she wants everyone to hear what she has to say.

Griff tells Finn that if he pushes away everyone trying to help, his recovery is going to be difficult. Brad takes notes.

Curtis produces a bowling ball. Jordan asks for pointers. Curtis gives her the ball, and some tips. She drops it, and it rolls away. She says she’s sorry to her neighbors downstairs, and Curtis says they’d better get used to noise. They start to kiss, but TJ knocks on the door.

Monica asks for a moment with Tracy. She tells Tracy that she knows how important the painting is, but this is an extreme situation. Tracy brings up the customs issue, and Monica says that if Samira gets caught, they can say she stole it. Tracy says that if Samira ends up in prison, that would be making a bad situation worse. Monica says she’s right, and Tracy wants that for her ringtone. She says it’s happening too fast. Samira showed up out of the blue and for all they know, she’s working with Larry. Monica suggests asking her some more questions.

Monica sits Samira down and says they want to know about her family life. Samira says she’d rather talk about their family. She sees how much Tracy loved her father, and talks about his kind eyes. Tracy says that Samira doesn’t know anything about Edward and never will.

Finn comes to Hayden’s office. He wants to talk about their last conversation. She says he needs to focus on his rehabilitation, and unless it’s hospital business, there’s nothing to discuss. He says compared to not talking to her getting off drugs should be easy. He’s wondering if when he gets through this, if she would give him a chance to make things right between them.

Nathan starts recording Nelle’s statement.

Griff asks Brad what he wants. Brad says it gives him no pleasure, but he feels it’s his duty to tell him what he knows about Finn.

Finn isn’t asking Hayden to be there while he’s in rehab, but wants to know if he’ll have a chance later. She says she’s been thinking about her decisions. She tells him how her father had always insisted on a huge Passover celebration, and he would talk about family, work, and unity, and how hard work pays off. Meanwhile, he was ripping people off right and left. All that talk about what truly mattered was a lie, and she ended up just like him, a liar and a user. Then she met Finn, but even though he brings out the best in her, she can’t make promises she might not be able to keep.

Tracy tells Samira that Monica forgot her manners, and Monica says people often wonder if she was raised by wolves. Tracy says that Monica married into the pack, but she requested breakfast for Samira. Tracy asks if she would like some orange juice, but Samira says she couldn’t eat a thing.

Michael asks Sonny why have Jax arrested for something he would have done himself? Sonny says that wasn’t his intention; he only wanted the confession as leverage. Michael wonders for what, since he wanted Jax to leave. Michael says that Jax isn’t the reason that Sonny and Carly broke up. Sonny says the reason is over; he didn’t sleep with Nelle. Michael says it’s about Morgan.

We don’t hear Nelle’s whole statement, but she ends with saying that she won’t be pursuing legal action. Carly asks if Jax is free to go, but Nathan says not yet. Carly says she’ll be back, leaving Jax and Nelle alone. Jax asks Nelle why.

Carly asks Nathan if it was enough. She says Sonny has a recording of Jax’s alleged confession, but she wants to know if Jax can be prosecuted using Nelle’s statement.

TJ returns Jordan’s laptop that he borrowed. He says he finished up early, and asks if they’re a couple now. They both stammer, and TJ says he’s been there. Jordan says they were just discussing going on their first date. They haven’t figured out if it’s serious yet, but would he be okay with that?

Tracy understands that Samira is worried and can’t eat. She says she’s the same way, but starving herself isn’t going to help her or her daughter. Samira asks for some water, and Tracy gets it. Geez, could she spare it? There’s like two inches in the glass. She says that she got Samira some new clothes and maybe she’d like to change. Monica leaves to make some calls.

Samira thanks Tracy for her generosity. She was hoping to convince Tracy of her sincerity. with the journal and ring. Tracy says she’d be happy to compensate her, but Samira says her father would want her to have them. Tracy says he wanted her to have the painting. Samira says maybe they can explore some other solutions. When she goes upstairs, Tracy puts the water glass in a plastic bag.

Griff tells Brad that he’s not at liberty to discuss Finn, and it would be inappropriate for Brad to ask about him. Brad says he’s on his way to the lab, and he’ll take the sample there, as he takes it from Griff’s hand. Why is Griff letting him do that??? Especially after what he just said.

Finn tells Hayden that he’s sorry for the interruption. He’ll send her a budgetary proposal through interoffice mail, so she doesn’t have to see him. Hayden says in order to stay clean, he has to follow the rules, and asks if he can do it.

Michael tells Sonny that if Morgan was still alive, he and Carly wouldn’t be doing this. They never did this kind of damage, and she’s forgiven him for worse than Nelle. She can’t get past it because Morgan is dead. When she wouldn’t forgive him, Sonny did something worse. He wanted to push her away, but it’s not going to lessen the grief; it will only add to it.

Nelle tells Jax that there are a lot of reasons why she wants to let it go, but she doesn’t want to hurt Josslyn anymore. She says what happened is on her father, not Jax. Jax says he’s still partly to blame. Nelle says he was willing to do anything for his daughter, and her father saw her as a way to get money. She’s not going to punish him for doing what she would have wanted her father to do. She tells him to tell Josslyn. She says something bad happened to her, and she had the choice to do something good, but instead chose to feed her own anger, lashing out and hurting people. She ended up hurting herself just as badly. She says an old friend told her that you can carry hurt with you or focus on the good and move on, and she’s trying to do that.

Nathan tells Carly that if victim refuses to testify, it shouldn’t go any further.

Finn tells Hayden not to worry. She says that she needs to know he’ll stick with it, with or without her. He says he’ll be fine with her or not. He leaves, and Griff walks in, wanting to talk about the budget. He can see that Hayden is upset, and he says he knows she’s worried about Finn. Well, she should be more worried than she is, since Griff is so loosey-goosey with Finn’s drug test.

TJ tells Jordan that the situation is odd, but he loves the both of them, and wants them to be happy. He hopes it works out, since it will be awkward if it doesn’t. He’s got to leave, and Curtis tells him be good, study hard, and you are the future. Curtis tells Jordan that they had to tell TJ, and that he seemed surprised, but he’s basically coming around. Jordan says he’s concerned about what happens if it doesn’t work out, and Curtis says she seems like she is too. She admits that she is.

Tracy sees Finn at the hospital. She says a situation has come up where she needs his help.

Michael tells Sonny that Josslyn is heartbroken. She already lost Morgan. He says Sonny isn’t thinking with his right mind. He’s grieving, and it’s messing with judgement and sense of perspective. It has nothing to do with him being bi-polar, but losing his son. Michael says he needs to find a better way to deal with the loss, rather than hurting everyone Morgan loved. Michael tells Sonny that he can try to fix it, but first he needs to know where Jax is in regard to the charges.

Nathan tells Carly that he’s taking Jax to the lawyer. Carly has something to say to Nelle.

Jordan tells Curtis they’ve been through a lot. Her attraction to him is definitely real, and they’ve both made a lot of mistakes in life. If they start this, and it blows up in their faces, she doesn’t want it to destroy their friendship. Curtis says that he shares her concern. She asks what now? He says there’s only one way to find out if it’s a mistake or real – do some serious bowling. I love Curtis.

Hayden says she can’t discuss it right now. Griff understands, but he’s hoping for the best. He thinks if Finn stays on the straight and narrow, it will be fine.

Tracy asks Finn to focus. She needs a DNA test done.

Monica wonders where Tracy went. The doorbell rings. It’s a man looking for Samira. He wants to speak to her now.

Michael tells Sonny that Jax is being released.

Carly thanks Nelle for not pressing charges, and Nelle says she wants the pain to stop. Carly says she’s on to her now. Almost everything Nelle has done, she did too. She says that Nelle wants to look good for Michael. She wants Michael to think he’s gotten through to her and she’s changed. She may want to believe she’s good enough for Michael, but she’s a damaged, screwed up little girl, who will end up trashing everything good she’s given. Carly says she’ll do everything she can to stop her.

Tomorrow, Tracy wants no questions asked, Franco thinks Jake is in serious trouble, and Nelle asks Carly when it’s going to be enough.

I have to mention how annoying it is to me when Carly says Nelle is just like her, then denies her the same graciousness that she ended up getting. She slept with her mother’s husband, for Pete’s sake. (Who is Pete anyway?) I’m sure I could look for some deep-seated psychological reason, such as Carly really doesn’t like herself, and is treating the Nelle the way she thinks she should really be treated, but I don’t have time.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Luann and Dorinda go to Luann’s house in Sag Harbor. Bethenny and Carole are staying at Bethenny’s place, and Bethenny is threatening to lock up Carole and Donald Trump in the guest house together. Bethenny talks to Carole about Sonja being bitter because she wasn’t invited to the Berkshires.

Sonja tells Tinsley about the talk she had with Luann. In her interview, Tinsley says if Sonja wants a friendship with Luann, she’ll have to drop talking about Tom.

Dorinda tells Luann that Sonja keeps talking smack about her. Luann tells her that Tinsley is living with Sonja right now. Dorinda says Sonja keeps talking about being sober, but for all they know, she could be drinking tequila through of a crazy straw at this very moment. She received a picture of Sonja and a stripper at Luann’s shower, and thinks Sonja’s life is in chaos.

Tinsley asks Sonja how she’s going to feel about seeing Dorinda. Sonja regrets not having her at the tea party, and says that two wrongs don’t make a right. Sonja and Tinsley compare underwear.

Carole wants a mellow weekend, since she has election stress. She’s feeling malaise. Please. She talks about Ramona getting irritated with her at the tea party when she was talking about the election. In her interview, Carole says Ramona isn’t interested in politics, and Bethenny says it’s all Carole talks about – all roads lead to the election. She adds that Carole doesn’t want to talk to anyone who isn’t on what she perceives as her political level. I can tell I’ll be gritting my teeth through this season, the same way I do when I go to Facebook.

Luann, daughter Victoria, and Dorinda go for a boat ride. Dorinda misses having a boat. They talk about Luann losing her countess title, which just now dawned on her daughter. In her interview, Luann says that Countess is part of who she is, and once a countess, always a countess. We all admire the fall colors in Sag Harbor.

Carole and Bethenny go for some acupuncture. Can they stick a needle in Carole’s brain so that she stops talking? Carole tells the acupuncturist that she’s stressed. In her interview, Bethenny says she’s never heard Carole say she’s stressed, and has wondered at times if she even had a pulse. Bethenny gets something done on her back. The acupuncturist looks at Carole’s tongue, and she also shows him fungus on her toe. Bethenny tells her that he’s not a podiatrist, and he’s like yeah, you need a different kind of healer for that. In her interview, Carole says Bethenny is in a secret, quiet hell due to suckerfish ex Jason Hoppy. Bethenny gets some cupping done. She wonders if Luann is going to say anything about the Tom thing in Miami when they get together, but Carole thinks she’ll keep it moving rather than face having a real conversation.

Bethenny and Carole arrive first for dinner. They see Ramona’s ex business partner at another table. Ramona arrives from visiting Avery. She claims the kids in Avery’s dorm look at her as a friend, but my guess is that they look at her as an anomaly, and probably an embarrassment. They look at pictures on Ramona’s phone while she fishes for compliments.

Dorinda and Luann arrive. Dorinda is anxious. She hasn’t seen Bethenny since the reunion, and there was a lot of tension. She and Carole talk about the election being scary, stressful, and close. They move on, discussing Luann’s house addition. Bethenny asks Ramona if she’s coming to the election party, but she feels like Carole already hit her over the head with it. Bethenny says that Carole doesn’t want people there who aren’t “informed,” and Ramona says everyone has their own interpretation. In her interview, Carole says her party is bi-partisan and everyone is invited…sort of. Huh? I certainly can’t imagine it being bi-partisan in any way.

Ramona asks Bethenny if her daughter has been approached by anyone since Bethenny did “soft porn” in her past, and it was in the tabloids recently. I missed that. She says yes, Diane Sawyer tracked her daughter down at the schoolyard. Ramona expresses concern, but Bethenny blows it off. In her interview, Bethenny says if anyone had brought it up, she would have just made some self-deprecating remarks, but Ramona is trying to embarrass her and has hit a new low. She says she needed the money and had wanted to be an actress at one time. Ramona says she doesn’t like Bethenny being defensive. Bethenny says it was a cheesy movie where she was a murderer. Ramona is all insulted because Bethenny doesn’t care. In her interview, Ramona says good friends should be able to ask each other questions. Luann says she doesn’t think Bethenny wanted Ramona to bring up her ex porno life, and Bethenny is like, you do realize I can hear you, right?

Bethenny says she thought Luann wrote a book on etiquette. Luann asks if what she said was wrong, and Bethenny says not if she’d said it to her, but it’s wrong to speak about her like she’s not there. She tells Ramona that she looks a bit wild, and Ramona says she doesn’t like Bethenny’s attitude. In her interview, Dorinda says she’s starting to sweat, and Ramona has the delivery of a lead balloon. Ramona tells Carole that because she doesn’t have children, she doesn’t understand. In her interview, Carole compares Ramona to Donald Trump and I want to cry. I’m hoping I don’t have to stop watching this. Ramona says Bethenny is rude, and Luann seconds it, but Bethenny says she doesn’t care what they think about her. Luann declares that Bethenny has shown her true colors, and doesn’t care about anyone except herself. In her interview, Luann gripes about Bethenny not asking about the wedding plans. Ramona calls Bethenny a witch, and decides to talk to Luann, deliberately turning away from Bethenny. Bethenny says she’s been called a witch and wicked, and she’s leaving. In her interview, Luann talks about Bethenny insulting her in the Berkshires, and how she didn’t leave. That was pretty bad. She thinks Bethenny should put on her big girl pants and stay. Carole gets up to go next. She thinks suckerfish Hoppy is enough; Bethenny doesn’t need this from Ramona.

Tinsley and Sonja arrive at Sonja’s house in the Hamptons. Sonja can’t wait for Ramona’s dinner party (why?), even though she wasn’t invited to stay at Ramona’s house. Sonja shows Tinsley to her room, and acts like an idiot bouncing on the bed.

Ramona, Luann, and Dorinda go to a winery for lunch. They discuss the previous evening. Ramona acts like she didn’t say anything outlandish, and just presented a hypothetical situation of concern to Bethenny. Luann says that Bethenny can dish it out, but not take it. In her interview, Dorinda says she didn’t even get to take a breath before Ramona started talking about it.

Bethenny says Ramona likes to find dirt about someone and bring it up. Truth! This reminded me of when she walked off the first (I think) reunion because Alex McCord had done some nude art photos. Bethenny is glad she doesn’t have to go to Ramona’s. She did get Ramona a gift, and Carole suggests she put her own name on the card and bring it. She’s kidding, just in case you questioned that. Bethenny is going to pick Carole up from Ramona’s later.

Dorinda tells Luann and Ramona about Sonja’s smack talk on Facebook. Filing that under who cares? Dorinda brings it up on her phone, and says she’s done. She doesn’t want to ruin Ramona’s party, but she might not be able to help herself. What happened to her telling Luann that she was going to act like a lady? Dorinda says Sonja is going to get it tonight.

Sonja tells Tinsley that Dorinda doesn’t have manners, but she wants to get back to being social friends and move forward. Tinsley is concerned that Sonja will be upset if she likes Dorinda, but Sonja says that won’t happen. Tinsley is nervous, and Sonja says it’s her fault.

Ramona sets things up for her dinner party. People we don’t know arrive, along with Dorinda. Dorinda shows Ramona more comments about her that Sonja posted. She says she’s going to make an effort to be cordial. Like that has ever happened.

Commercial break that annoys me. The first one is Maya Rudolph advertising Seventh Generation cleaning products, when she also advertises Clorox. Aren’t those opposite ends of the cleaning spectrum? Then I see Jeffrey Tambor promoting Tide, and wonder how much more money he needs? I can’t stand it when wealthy, well-known actors take jobs away from starving artists.

Carole arrives at Ramona’s place. Dorinda tells her about Sonja’s online comments, and how she said she’d never go to Luann’s tacky wedding. Dorinda says she has a mole, as in an investigative person, and has a file on Sonja a mile wide. Dorinda isn’t on the martini train tonight because she’s stalking prey.

Sonja says in her interview, that her MO is to never confront. She doesn’t deal with the elephant in the room, and is all about decorum. She and Tinsley walk into Ramona’s house.

Next time, the dinner commences, Carole tells Bethenny that it’s a nuthouse while Bethenny watches from outside, Dorinda informs Sonja that you need an invitation to go to a wedding, and Ramona is disinvited to Carole’s election party.

A Quote that Can’t Wait for Friday

Do one thing every day that scares you. – Eleanor Roosevelt

🙌 Imposters has been renewed! It will be back in 2018. Hopefully, I’ll make it until then.

😹 Michael Rapaport is always hysterically funny on Watch What Happens Live, and tonight was no exception. He makes me literally lol.

Apr19

April 19, 2017 – A Painting Conundrum, Tyler Tuesday & Beverly Hills Reunions On

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

We revisit Tracy’s unveiling of the clown picture. Tracy realizes that Larry wasn’t around during the fire drill. That’s because he was busy stealing the painting. He kisses it, and says that when Tracy tries to screw him out of a deal, she just ends up screwing herself. I’m not feeling the new Larry, and wish they’d bring back the previous actor.

Jake sees Franco at the hospital, and asks if he’s back to work. Franco says not yet, and finds out that Jake is there to see Andre. Franco shows him a picture of the latest drawing on the timeline, and asks if he knows how it got into his studio.

At the docks, Jason tells Sam that Julian is desperate to get out of town. Sam wonders what Julian would do to Alexis if she ran into him. Well…

Alexis and Julian are getting busy.

Tracy says every time Larry darkens her doorstep, she has to pay, and he’s not getting away with it. The others agree, and split up to look for Larry.

Jake insists he didn’t draw on the timeline, and it must have been one of his brothers. Franco wonders which one could have gotten into his studio. He asks who Jake thinks the boy in the picture is, and he says he doesn’t know. Franco asks if there’s anything he wants to talk about. Jake tells him not to tell anyone, especially his parents. Elizabeth comes up the stairs, telling Jake not to run off like that.

Jason finds Hooper on the docks. He says that he and Sam have some questions.

Alexis tells Julian that when she turned around on the bridge, he was gone. He says Olivia-J shot him, but even though it bled a lot, it wasn’t serious. He was the phantom stalking her, and apologizes for scaring her. She says she read the letter. He wishes he hadn’t taken so long to tell her the truth. He tells her that he’s sorry. She says she thought he was gone. He says he’s here now, and he’s never going to leave her.

On the grounds of the Quartermaine estate, Larry talks to someone on the phone about storing the painting. He literally runs into a strange girl, and drops it. It’s the girl from the monastery, and he asks who she is. Ned, Laura, and Dillon run up. Larry blames the girl for stealing the painting, but they don’t buy it. Ned grabs Larry, and the painting, and gives him the bum’s rush back to the house.

Laura thanks the girl for stopping Larry. She introduces herself as Samira Adine, and Laura asks what brought her there. She’s there to see Tracy.

Tracy tells Larry he’s despicable. Larry says that he at least deserves a finder’s fee, and Tracy says he’s lucky she’s not calling the police. Tracy says where were we, and Monica says hogging the happy couple’s spotlight. Tracy unveils the real painting. She says it was painted by a renaissance painter, and Monica apologizes, saying it’s beautiful. Ned says the resemblance is striking. He tells Tracy that her father loved her.

Elizabeth tells Jake that he’s not in trouble, but Andre is waiting for him, and he leaves. She tells Franco she doesn’t know if she’s doing the right thing. Whenever she tries to get Jake to open up about the island, he pulls away. She’d feel less useless as a mother if she knew what she was doing was right. Franco shows her the picture of the timeline and what Jake added.

Hooper tells Sam and Jason that if he sells out clients, he’s out of business. Jason says if Sonny gets mad, he’ll be out of business. Sam tells him that they’re good friends with Sonny, and asks why he was meeting Julian.

Alexis thought Hooper was helping Julian, and Julian says that was the plan. He wondered what she’d do if she found out he was alive, and now he knows. He thought they might still have a future. She tells him that he can’t stay in Port Charles. He suggests running away together. They’ll get word back eventually, and the kids will understand. They can start over. No right side or wrong side; just the two of them together. Alexis says he misunderstood what happened tonight. It’s not a fresh start. It’s good-by.

Hooper tells Jason and Sam that Julian never showed up. Sam asks if there was a woman with Julian when Hooper met with him, but Hooper says no. He tells them that if Julian makes contact, he’ll call. He leaves, and Jason tells Sam that if Alexis went with him, it was probably willingly.

Alexis says she understands why Julian has to disappear, but she’s not going. He says they love each other, and she says he held a knife to her throat. I hate when that happens. It’s such a buzzkill.  Julian says it’s the biggest regret of his life, and she knows why he did it. Alexis says that she knows how she felt, and can’t get past it. She says it’s not just about Olivia-J forcing him to do her bidding; it’s what he did before that. She asks if it was his intention to hurt Duke and Carrrlos. Julian says he loves her, and she tells him it doesn’t mean anything; there are two sides to him. He tells her that they both would stand by her, which is a pretty clever comeback. She says it’s only a matter of time before someone else gets hurt, and she’s not doing it. He says it wasn’t all bad, and she says it wasn’t, but it was built on the hope that the better side of him would win. He asks about tonight. She says she just wanted to remember. He promises it can always be like that, but she says he can’t promise that. She needs closure, and needs him to give it to her.

Tracy tells Ned to get Larry out. Tracy asks Monica if she can replace the wall-hanging now, but Monica thinks the painting should go in the front hall. Laura and Samira come in, and Ned says Samira is the one who caught Larry. Samira says she’s traveled a long way from Turkey to see Tracy. Tracy wonders how Samira tracked her down, and Samira says the monks gave her the information. The painting has to be returned. Tracy says she explained everything to the monks, and she’s willing to make another donation, but she’s not parting with the painting. Samira says her daughter’s life depends on it.

Franco tells Elizabeth what Jake said about the timeline. She says it’s obviously something he witnessed. Franco isn’t sure if it’s literal. Elizabeth thanks him, and says she’ll talk to Andre. Jake sees them hugging. Franco has the phone in his hand, and Jake asks if he showed Elizabeth his picture. Franco says she needs to know, and Jake runs away.

Sam tells Jason that she doesn’t think finding the scarf is an accident, and isn’t going to allow history to keep repeating. The only way to keep Julian away is to find him and send him to prison. Sam remembers an app she has that tracks down friends, and finds Alexis’s location. She says they have to call the police.

Julian tells Alexis that the only life worth living is one with her in it. She says she wishes she could say the same thing. Her feelings re powerful, and he caused so much heartache. She doesn’t want any more pain, and it’s the only place this will lead. He says he loves her, and he’ll honor her wishes. He’s leaving town, and he’ll never see her again. He asks her to just give him tonight, and they start getting busy again.

Larry tells Ned that all’s right with the world. Ned says hardly. Larry swiped the painting like it was a piece of jewelry he could pawn. Larry suggests they not discuss it in mixed company, since Olivia-F is with Ned. Ned says Olivia is his family, which is more than he can say for Larry. Larry wants to let bygones be bygones. He says Tracy will forget about it; she’s used to his schemes, and it’s no reason to kick him out. Ned says he’s no longer welcome, and he’s disinvited to the wedding. Larry says he’s not going anywhere, and sooner or later Ned will miss him. Ned doubts it.

Tracy asks Samira for ID. She says it looks correct, but could have been forged. Laura looks at the emergency visa. She notes that it’s for Virginia. Samira explains that some refugees helped her. She tells them about men kidnapping her daughter. Dillon thinks it sounds like human trafficking. Laura realizes that Samira was the one who was crying at the monastery. Samira says that she went to the monks for help, and they wanted to use the painting to bargain.

Dillon wants Tracy to give her the painting. Tracy wants to think about it because she’s hesitant to believe the story. Monica says if the monks believe the story, maybe they can just give them the money. Tracy says they could all end up in jail. Samira says if she took the painting, no money would change hands.

Ned tells Olivia-F that he wonders how he sprang from the same gene pool as Larry. She says good parenting has nothing to do with DNA, and he proves that with Leo. Ned says with Julian gone, he wants to be there for Leo. He asks if the offer is still on the table to adopt Leo. It is.

Alexis has to leave. Julian tells her to take care of Sam and Lucas, and to take care of herself. A lot of people love her, and if she wants a drink, call them. She tells him to be careful. They’re about to kiss, and the police bust in, along with Jason and Sam.

Tracy says that customs knows she has the painting. If it ends up as currency, she’ll get in trouble. She suggests Laura get ahold of Robert, and find out the details. Monica says they’ll get some food and make up a room for Samira. Laura says she’ll call Robert, but she thinks Samira is telling the truth, and Tracy might be the only one who can help.

Elizabeth and Franco can’t find Jake. Elizabeth says this is how it started. Franco tells her to check Andre’s office. He sees sneakers next to a cart, and finds Jake hiding. Jake tells him to go away. Franco says he gets it; he wouldn’t want to talk to him either, but his mom is worried. Jake doesn’t want them knowing anything else about the scarecrow.

Julian says Alexis is his hostage. BTW, this place is called the Rendezvous Motel. Very classy. Julian is arrested. He and Alexis stare at each other.

Samira asks Tracy to believe her. Tracy says painting means a lot to her. Samira shows her a journal and a ring. Tracy says her father had a ring like this. She opens the journal, and sees Edward’s handwriting. She finds a picture of Lila. She asks where Samira got this. Samira says she got them from her mother. Tracy’s father left them to her, as they’d been friends. She says she’s telling the truth. Monica takes her upstairs.

Tracy talks to the painting like it’s Edward. She says, she has blue eyes, and not to do this to her.

Tomorrow, Hayden can’t make any promises, Tracy isn’t giving up her father’s legacy, and Michael tells Sonny to leave Port Charles.

If Loving You is Wrong

Kelly finds out that Justice is in the car with Travis. She tells her assistant to call the police. Doesn’t that kid have a GPS on his phone? Kelly wants to talk to Travis, who tells her it’s illegal to talk on the phone and drive. She asks where he’s taking Justice, but he pretends like he can’t hear her. He tells her he’s hanging up, and that Justice loves her.

Kelly gets on the phone with Officer Rick. She tells him that Travis has her son. Rick takes down whatever information she has, which isn’t much. He gives another officer the phone number, and has him run a trace on Justice’s phone. Kelly keeps repeating, “Why is he doing this?”

Rick puts an APB out on Travis’s car. Esperanza asks what’s going on. Kelly calls her and tells her about Travis taking Justice. Esperanza says she’ll call her back. I don’t blame Esperanza for being frustrated all the time when she has to find out what emergencies are going on from neighbors. Kelly tries to get Justice back on the phone, but gets voicemail. Justice asks Travis where they are. Kelly tries calling him, but call, rinse, repeat.

Brad pretends to work. Eddie strolls in. He asks if Alex told him what happened before he got there. Brad says no, and Eddie says he has to hear it. He tells Brad about finding Alex with Andrew, and how she took off in the squad car. He claims he did everything he could to stop her. He wonders why Brad saved the baby, and Brad says it’s an innocent baby. Eddie says it’s a disgrace to him. He can’t figure out what’s going on, and Brad says that’s because he doesn’t have a heart. Eddie says Brad is his best friend and he can help him. They have Alex where they want her. If he spills the beans, she’ll go to jail. Brad can make her do anything he wants. Brad says he’s had enough. Eddie tells him it’s no time to get soft, but Brad says he’s done with it. He tells Eddie that Alex has suffered enough, and he’s done. Eddie says what about Brad’s suffering, and Brad tells him to leave. Eddie says he’ll go, but the soldier he knew wouldn’t let himself become a mockery. When his best friend comes back, call, but until then, he’s out.

Marcie brings flowers to Louise. She asks what the doctor said, and Louise says she’s under observation. Marcie wants Louise out of there, and Louise wants out too. They hug, and Louise thinks Marcie has a temperature. Marcie says she’s fine. They talk about Randal. Marcie says she stayed as far away as possible, but Louise says her heart didn’t. Marci calls Randal a bully, and says she wants nothing to do with him. She can love and worry about him, but not like him.

She starts to tell Louise something, and Randal comes in. He tells Louise how angry he is with Alex. Louise tells him to say hello to Marcie. Marcie wants to go; she says she can’t breathe. He asks if she’s sucking all the air out of Brad, and she says every chance she gets. She tells Louise she’ll be back. Randal calls her a slut, and she says she’s using the tricks he taught her. She leaves, and Louise tries to chastise Randal, but he doesn’t want to hear it.

Randal tells Louise that Alex said the child wasn’t his. Louise asks if he’s sure it is. Randal says Alex told the judge that she had multiple partners. Louise says, chalk one up for the white girl. Ha-ha! She says if a woman will cheat on her husband, why wouldn’t she cheat on her boyfriend? Randal insists it was only him, and that’s his son. Louise tells him that Alex let her see the baby, and tells Randal about talking to Alex. She says he could be Randal’s son, and Randal says no way he’s not. Louise thinks it’s foolish and naïve for Randal to think he’s the only one. He says the only other Black man that Alex knows is the mailman. Louise says it wouldn’t be the first time a housewife hooked up with a mailman, and Randal says he’s like, 200 years old.

Randal asks what Marcie wanted, and Louise says he ran her out before she could say. He asks if he can get Louise anything. She says peace, quiet, and time alone. She tells Randal he wears her out, and to go home. She tells him to check on the mailman. Ha-ha! I love Louise.

Diane shows up at Kelly’s office while she’s on the phone. Kelly says now is not the time. Diane wonders how she’s working around money, considering her past, and asks if they know her background. Kelly says she can’t afford to lose her job, and Diane suggests they talk then. Kelly asks Diane what she wants. Diane wants a key, since her son is getting out soon. Kelly says she needs time to talk to her son and explain things. Diane offers to talk to him, and Kelly wigs out a little bit. Diane asks if Kelly knows what it’s like to not know where her son is and what he’s doing. Kelly says more than Diane knows. Diane asks if Kelly understands about a mother wanting to protect her son. She wants the key. Kelly gives it to her.

Joey wants out of the hospital. Natalie is surprised he hasn’t been kicked out, but doesn’t think he’s ready to go. She says he’s barely walking, and will need rehab. He says he can walk and she asks him to show her. He can’t, and she says he’s not some superhero. He says he will be getting out. Natalie tells him that he has physical therapy today.

There’s a knock at the door. It’s Mr. Kim. Joey asks about Faun, and he says she’s home and healing. Natalie says she knows he’s upset that they were together, but he says he’s not. He thanks Joey for saving her life. He says if Joey hadn’t had a gun, he doesn’t know what would have happened. He owes Joey. Joey says another guy is dead because of him. Mr., Kim offers Joey his job back, and leaves them to their family time.

Joey says that was crazy. Natalie says she’ll be back. She sees Mr. Kim in the hallway. She asks if he paid Joey’s hospital bills. He didn’t, and she’s wondering why they’re letting Joey stay there when they have no insurance. Mr. Kim is surprised they don’t have any, because he’s under the mistaken impression that it’s actually affordable. Natalie goes back into Joey’s room, and Joey asks what she said to Mr. Kim. She’s saved by the phone ringing. Lushion says he needs her help. He tells her to come to the house. She says she’s on her way. She tells Joey to try to walk.

Alex burns dinner. She tells the kids she’ll take them out. They ask how they’re getting there, and she says she’ll call a cab. Peter asks where the car is, and she says she had an accident. Paisley asks about the baby, and she tells them to stop asking questions. She apologizes for being snippy. Paisley asks if she’s okay. She tells them to get ready, and tells Peter to ask Kelly if she can borrow her car. The kids go upstairs, and Alex cries.

Lushion stops by and asks if he can borrow candles. Alex invites him in, and creepy Randal watches from his porch. Lushion asks if everything is okay, and Alex says she burned dinner. She looks for the candles and gives him some really nice ombre ones. He says he wants to surprise Natalie, and tells Alex not to let her know. He says it feels good to borrow from neighbors. He says he knows what Alex is going through, and mentions Randal pressing charges. Alex asks if she can go to jail for what her parents did. Lushion says she had nothing to do with it…right? He asks if she saw Andrew, and she says he picked her up after she wrecked her car. Lushion asks if Andrew took her to her parents, but the kids come down and interrupt the conversation. Lushion says they can borrow his car, but Alex says they’ll just walk to the deli. Paisley says she doesn’t like deli food – like no kid ever said – and Alex says they’ll get some fresh air. Lushion thanks her and leaves. She follows with the kids. Creepy Randal is still in the same position he was when Lushion arrived, and quietly calls Alex a bitch.

Both Pete and Joey are in physical therapy. Pete is walking a little, and Joey says he needs a break. Pete introduces himself to Joey. They discover they were both shot. Pete says he was an innocent bystander, and Joey says he’s a cop in Maxine. Pete plays along, asking Joey how long he’s been a cop, and Joey says years. Pete ask if he was shot in the line of duty. Joey makes up a story, saying his back-up was late. Pete asks who it was and Joey says a guy named Lushion. He says Lushion is way too old to be a cop, and was probably out getting doughnuts. Pete asks what he called in when he got shot. Joey says 187 and even I know that’s incorrect. Pete points that out.

Some cops bust in to arrest Joey for violating probation. They drag him out of his chair, saying he can go to the prison hospital. Joey is yelling, and the doctor tries to intervene, but they cart Joey away.

Next time, Randal confronts Alex, Kelley’s ex says that he loves her, and Alex comes on to Randal, totally creeping me out.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Reunion Part Two

We just jump right in. Erika says she didn’t like the way PK asked if she’s for sale. He’s defensive of Dorit, but Erika says her beef is with him. Andy says she’d claimed to be over it, and LisaV suggests having a sense of humor. A viewer asks if LisaV has forgiven Erika for her accusing her of sniping from the sidelines, and we see a clip of Erika talking to someone who’s no longer on the show, it was so long ago. Lisa says she thought Erika was relaxed with her nudity, and we flash back to some flashes. Kyle says it wasn’t funny because Erika wasn’t in on the joke. A viewer suggests Kyle could have intervened, and Kyle says she told Dorit she didn’t think it would go well. She and LisaV get in a small argument. They both talk at once, so who knows what it’s about? Kyle tells Lisa not to turn things around, and that she wasn’t there.

LisaR asks why Dorit doesn’t just apologize. Because LisaR only listens to herself. Dorit has apologized over and over. Andy says he was surprised that Erika didn’t tell Tom right away, and asks how she approached him about it. She says she explained how the story was going to pan out, and he gets it, which doesn’t surprise me in the least. Erika implies that Dorit drug her through the mud. Andy asks PK how he felt about LisaR asking if Dorit trusted him, but he just rolled with it. Lisa says she’s sorry for that. PK apologizes for the joke he made, but says he doesn’t owe an apology to Tom.

Dorit says she doesn’t know how many times she can say sorry. Erika says she wasn’t the one who wouldn’t let it go. Dorit says everyone was still joking about it. She points out that Andy just did when they sat down. PK says he’s heard all their insults, and all he did was make a bad joke. Please, PK, don’t say it’s not like you killed her child.

Since he can’t leave it alone, Andy brings up PK saying that Erika should concentrate on the deep-rooted problems in her marriage. Erika says he doesn’t even know her, but LisaR keeps interjecting, and PK says he seems to be discussing Erika with Lisa. Lisa says that he claimed she was unhinged and maybe had a drug problem. He says his first experience with her was at a dinner he thought went fabulous, and he can’t believe she could leave such a great evening, then say there were bad intentions. Lisa deflects, saying that Dorit didn’t remember the conversation they had about Eileen’s father passing away. Huh? Andy interjects, asking why Lisa said that the people at dinner left to “blow some rails.” I guess he thinks he sounds hip. Lisa says she’d gotten to a point that she’d had it with the Xanax thing. Dorit says she never said Lisa had a problem, but Lisa went after her with a preposterous accusation. PK says he’s never done coke, and the suggestion was ridiculous. LisaV says it’s a damaging thing to say, and thinks it was just retaliation. LisaR insists that’s what she observed. PK says you don’t have to be honest, if it’s not factual, which is another way of saying what I always do, that these women tend to hide their animosity behind the guise of honesty. Andy says fake news is all the rage. Because he’s so Andy.

LisaR talks about the inappropriate stuff said by PK after the confrontation at LisaV’s party, and that he should have let it go. PK admits that they were being naughty. Dorit came back distraught, and he felt that the mean girls had bullied his wife. His emotions were running high, and he’d had a few drinks. I’m with him here. Both he and Ken were inappropriate, but they were just letting off steam privately. LisaR says if she’d said something, it would be different, and PK says that she’s said a million things that she’s apologized for. There’s no question that he was upset. He says that he did walk away from the confrontation, because none of the other husbands were there, and Dorit says Erika is the one who invited him into the conversation.

PK tells Erika she’s not nice, and she tells him to get the f out of here. She says it’s easy to apologize in hindsight, and it’s fine. Andy asks if it really is, and she says they have to start over and they’ll see.

We see a montage of the Beverly Hills double air kiss greeting, which is also a chance to look over some past fashion. Kyle says she was sometimes embarrassed by the hellos. We see the various careers and projects the women have going on. Erika hits the nail on the head saying, busy girls. They talk about Erika performing at Christina Aguilera’s birthday party. Everyone promotes their whatever. We find out Kyle’s show was picked up, but she won’t be on it personally. Erika is also coming back to The Young and the Restless. Erika was partly named after Erika Kane from All My Children, and we see part of a talk show interview where she met Susan Lucci. Dorit talks about the many businesses that she and PK are involved with. She’s encouraged by the other women to continue with designing clothing, and having her own thing going apart from PK.

Kim and Eden join the group. We see a picture of Kim’s grandson, who’s wearing one of those terrycloth hoodies with animal ears and looks adorable. We also see a picture of Kim on a date with Donald Trump. Andy suggests Kim could have been the First Lady, but she doesn’t want to talk about it. We flash back to scenes with Eden. We see many awkward hugs. Even Eden has to laugh. She’s wearing some fabulous fringe earrings that I probably can’t afford, and explains about the long hugs breaking the introduction energy, and that sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.

LisaV talks about having known Vidal Sassoon, but says she’d never met Eden. I remember liking his jean brand. Eden has been busy on Twitter shading Kyle. Eden says in watching the show, she saw how mean Kyle was. Kyle asks her to put herself in her shoes. She thought they were cool, then Eden said she was cold and distant in her interview. She adds that Eden ambushed her with questions about alcoholism right off the bat.

Andy brings up Eden and LisaR becoming fast friends, and how that changed, and we see clips. Including the one where Lisa said that Kim was close to death. It’s all worth watching to see LisaV’s sparkly earrings when she told Kyle what Eden had said. Ooh, Eden’s ballerina outfit at LisaV’s party is pretty good too. Andy reads viewer questions. Eden explains that she was overwhelmed in meeting Kim, and couldn’t not stick her nose where it didn’t belong. She doesn’t say it quite like that, but that’s my translation. Andy asks what Eden thought was wrong, and Eden says she felt nervous energy. Kim suggests when she feels that, to respect people’s spaces. She says they could have been friends, but instead of going to the source, Eden just repeated what LisaR had said and badgered Kyle. Kim says that Eden shouldn’t have been taking her inventory, and Eden tells Kim not to tell her how to work a program. Well, if part of the program is not taking anyone else’s inventory, then Kim has a right to point that out.

Andy asks the million-dollar question – why the blip did LisaR say what she did about Kim not being sober and close to death? Kim suggests that she doesn’t remember. Lisa says it was after game night. We flash back to their tiff. Kim says that Lisa lies, cries, and denies, and that it was unbelievable to watch. She says that Lisa has a huge heart, and she does like being around her. Lisa says they’ve made amends since then, and have moved on. Kim has big hopes. Andy asks about the bunny that Lisa gifted Kim’s grandson with. Here’s where it gets confusing.

Kim has brought said bunny, still in the wrapper. She didn’t give it to her grandson, because she didn’t feel that it had good energy. She gives it back to LisaR, and tells her when she’s in a better place, maybe she can give it back to her. This is the stupidest, meanest thing ever. Kim says she’s all about energy and being positive. Eden asks if she wants a crystal for healing, and Kim says she is healed. Kim says that Lisa might be better off giving it to someone else. Lisa starts crying, and Eileen wonders why Kim chose to do this at the reunion. Kim says she doesn’t know what’s real and what’s not with LisaR. Andy asks Lisa what she’s thinking. She says she doesn’t need to say anything; she gets it loud and clear. Andy is confused, since he thought they were in a good place, but Kim says she doesn’t know if she’s ready to be Lisa’s friend. Lisa says it’s okay. She’s forgiven herself, and she’s okay with that. Kyle interjects that Kim is like that, but she sees why Lisa feels badly. Lisa says Harry thought it was a good idea to give Kim the gift, even though she had second thoughts. Kim says maybe it’s good that she feels badly, since she hurt Kim.

LisaR says she has to leave the stage for a moment. Eileen follows. Eileen says that it was a calculated move, trying to demean and hurt Lisa, when Lisa was just being nice. Lisa says she’s good because she has a good life. They regroup.

Dorit says it’s not like LisaR is just the victim. Kyle tells Kim to go back and explain to LisaR how superstitious she is. Yeah. More like yearning for attention. LisaR is an idiot, but this is nasty.

Eileen says it just shows where she’s at, and LisaR says Kim showed her true colors.

Kim goes backstage with the bunny. It’s like some bizarro world version of Fatal Attraction.

Next time – the Reunion, part three – Dorit tells LisaR she has a big mouth, the bag of pills is revealed, and Kim accuses Eileen of making faces (like no one else does that). If anyone deserve a four-part reunion, it’s these girls, but I think that three is it with this one.

 

 

 

Apr18

April 17, 2017 – A Painting Vanishes, an Auction is Silent, a Reunion Ends & Tubbers is Celebrated

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Alexis tells Sam that she thought she was losing her mind, but she wasn’t. Sam wonders why Julian doesn’t just come forward, and Jason says he’s facing criminal charges. Jason is going to hunt him down.

Dillon takes pictures of the happy couple at the engagement party. Ned and Olivia kiss.

Tracy has put the covered painting on an easel in the den. Monica says she’ll have it removed later. Laura pops in, thanking Monica for the invitation. She wonders if they could mix hospital business with pleasure. Larry sees the mysterious masterpiece. He calls it their acquisition, because without him, Tracy wouldn’t have known about it. He thinks he should get 50% of the value, but Tracy says it was left to her by her father, and has nothing to do with him. He asks about a finder’s fee, and she says he’s drinking it.

Carly tells Sonny to leave or she’s calling the police. He says from what Michael said, Jax might be uncomfortable with that. Jax says he’s not proud of what he did, but doesn’t regret it. Carly says that Sonny would have done the same thing. Sonny says he would, but it’s what came after that’s the problem. Jax left them like sitting ducks for Nelle. Let’s just say it right now – isn’t that what Sonny did? Carly says that Jax had no reason to think Nelle had an ulterior motive, but Sonny did. Sonny says it was hard enough thinking he was responsible for Morgan’s death, but Jax could have avoided the outcome with Nelle. Carly says he’s blaming Jax. Jax made a mistake and should have told her, but the rest is on Sonny, and he’s blaming someone else. She tells Sonny he has to live with it. Dante knocks on the door looking for Sonny. Carly tells Sonny to do everyone a favor and leave with him.

Dante says he was hoping Michael was wrong about Sonny being there. Sonny talks smack about Jax. Jax tells Dante about buying the kidney, saying that he didn’t know Frank would hit up his own daughter for it, but even if he had known, he would have gone through with it. He would have done anything to save Josslyn. Sonny says he was going to use it as leverage, but since Dante is there, it’s time for Jax to pay up, and he’s recorded it. Dante wishes he could ignore it, but he can’t.

Ned thanks Tracy and Monica for the party. Olivia has brought bruschetta. Tracy is like, you brought food to a Quartermaine party? She says Cook will be insulted, thinking hers isn’t good enough. Larry says he’ll present it to Cook. Tracy says good luck, and Monica says they’re a special couple.

Tracy wants to unveil the painting. Monica balks, and Tracy says it could be a Picasso or Manet for all she knows. Monica asks if it is, and Tracy says no, but it’s a precious family heirloom. A smoke alarm goes off. Yeah, I see where this is headed.

Sam is concerned about Alexis being by herself. She says she’s seen Julian break Alexis. Alexis says Julian is her father, but Sam says not to use her for an excuse. Alexis says if Julian was going to hurt her, he would have done it. Jason wants to call Sonny, but Alexis says she’ll take care of it. Sam asks what If he shows up, and Alexis says she’ll cross bridge when she comes to it. Jason tells Sam he has an idea.

Julian hangs out at the docks looking stupid in a hoodie. One obviously not purchased from Zumiez.

The fire alarm continues, and Tracy says it’s Olivia’s fault. Cook probably set a fire in protest. They all leave to check things out, since no one smells smoke. Jason and Sam walk into the house, and the alarm stops. Sam says they need to see Dillon. Jason shows him the picture from the park, and Sam says it’s Julian, alive and well.

Julian looks at the picture he swiped from the album – he and Alexis in a red carpet moment. He flashes back to when they last got married.

Sonny asks Michael if he sent Dante over. Michael says that he didn’t want Sonny to do anything he’d regret. Sonny says they’re all adults who have to live with the consequences of their actions, even Jax. Michael asks what he did.

Dante says as much as he agrees with Jax’s motives, he has to arrest him. Josslyn walks in, and asks what Dante is doing to her father.

Sonny tells Michael that he confronted Jax. He admits he would have done the same thing in Jax’s place, but the difference is, he would have said something. Instead, Jax went back to Australia. No comment. Michael says that Jax didn’t perceive her as a threat. Sonny tells him not to make excuses. He tells Michael about getting the recording and giving it to Dante. Michael asks if he’s out of his mind.

Carly tells Josslyn that her dad is going to be fine. Dante says he won’t cuff him, but he has to come in. Josslyn asks if he’s under arrest, and Dante lets Jax talk to her. Jax tells her that he’s the one who arranged for her to get Nelle’s kidney. They weren’t sure if she was going to make it, so he did something illegal. He offered Nelle’s father money to help find a donor, and it’s his fault she came to town looking for revenge. Josslyn says because of him, she’s alive.

Julian meets a guy with tattoos on the docks who says it’s all arranged.

Dillon brings down his laptop and they look at photos from the park. They see another one where Julian is giving an envelope to a guy. Sam says the tattoo seems familiar, and remembers Hooper who has boats for hire, usually for illegal purposes.

Alexis wanders around the docks because that’s the place to be in Port Charles. She flashes back to the aftermath of the wedding, and Julian saying he loves her.

Dante says they have to go. Jax tells Josslyn it will be fine. He says he broke the law and told himself if it ever came out, he wouldn’t run. He tells Carly he’s sorry. She tells him he has nothing to apologize for, and thanks him for saving Josslyn’s life. Josslyn tells Dante that he knows it’s not right. Carly says she knows Josslyn is hurting, but her father has to go with Dante. Jax tells her not to be scared. He leaves with Dante.

Sonny tells Michael that he doubts it will go to trial. If Jax spends two days in jail, he’ll be surprised. Michael asks what if he’s wrong. and he send Josslyn’s father to prison for saving her life? I see we now have idiot Sonny totally back again.

Dillon gives Jason a printout the picture. He tells Kiki it’s just another night in Port Charles. Not yet if they haven’t been to the docks. He asks if she wants a drink, and she says she’d like several. Larry asks where everyone has been. Tracy explains about the fire alarm, but he says he was out walking the grounds and didn’t hear it. Ned asks about Cook, and Larry says she wants Olivia’s recipe. Monica toasts to Olivia joining the family. She says Olivia is going to breathe new life into the house, and make it into a home again. Tracy is snarky, and Monica says she got the same treatment. Tracy says to be fair, Monica did sleep with her husband’s nephew. Everyone is like, eww! and Monica asks if they can focus on the here and now. She asks if Ned and Olivia would like the west wing. If not, Tracy can move out of the east wing. Tracy protests, and Monica reminds her that the deed is in her name. Tracy says there’s something she’d like to do with the deed, and Monica suggests it’s the same thing she wants to do with the easel.

Alexis lingers at the docks. She remembers Julian holding a knife to her throat. Julian appears. For real.  I think.

Josslyn asks Carly what’s going to happen, and Carly explains. She says that Jax’s lawyer will make arrangements for bail. Josslyn asks why Dante was there, and Carly says Michael called him, but it’s complicated. She says she and Sonny have been fighting, and sometimes when Sonny gets angry, he doesn’t make the best decisions. She’s sorry she let everything get out of control, but Josslyn says not to apologize for Sonny. She hopes Carly sees the truth and never goes back to him.

Michael thought Dante could get through to Sonny, but didn’t think Sonny would have Jax arrested. He says he doesn’t care what Jax did, Sonny should have covered for him. He reminds Sonny about all the times Carly covered for him, and he committed crimes; he didn’t save a life. He chose the wrong way to hurt them. He tells Sonny that he’d better pray he can clean it up, because if Jax goes to prison, no one is going to forgive him. The cheese Sonny stands alone yet again.

Jax is sorry that Dante got dragged in. Dante wonders where the justice is. Jax crossed the line to save his daughter’s life, and he understands, but the line exists for a reason. Jax realizes that if it didn’t, the poor people would be at a disadvantage. He says that those are the questions he asks himself. Did his actions keep another child from being saved? Probably not. I doubt Frank would have just decided to sell Nelle’s kidney all on his own.

Tracy asks what the painting has done to Monica, and Monica says it’s the owner. Ned and Dillon think it has something to do with Luke. Monica says the only time Tracy was really happy was with him. Tracy points out that Laura is sitting there, but Laura says she and Luke are ancient history. Tracy suggests changing the subject, and says she’s happy for Ned and Olivia. Her son is happy, and it’s all a parent wants for their children. She thanks Olivia. Olivia says she’s honored to be joining the family, and Tracy says, perfect segue.

Tracy tells everyone that she took a journey with a dear friend and found a treasure – a letter from her father that spoke of his love for her. Monica says it must have meant a lot. Tracy tells her that it did, and he left her something else as a tangible expression of his devotion to her. He wanted her to have a portrait, passed down through ages, that bears an uncanny resemblance to her. She lifts the cover off of the portrait, and in its place is a clown painting on velvet. Like we didn’t see that coming.

Sam and Jason go to the docks. Jason says there’s no sign of anything, and Sam suggests that Julian is halfway to Canada by now. She sees Alexis’s scarf on the ground and picks it up.

Tomorrow, Larry has the painting (no surprise), the crying girl from the monastery is looking for Tracy, and Julian and Alexis get busy.

Southern Charm

I might not like Cameran (our narrator) all that much, but I sure do like her gigantic earrings.

At the Ravenel Construction Group, we see Thomas actually doing some work. Cameran is at the gym with Chelsea. She says that she lives off of gas station food, and wants to take charge of her health. She tells Chelsea that she heard she and Shep had an overnight. Chelsea says they didn’t get nakey, but Cameran has hope. She tells Chelsea to make him work for it, and Chelsea says right now, things are just PG.

Landon (blech!) meets Craig for lunch. Craig is doing media inserts for a charity that his girlfriend got him involved with. His goal is to be a philanthropist and not have to work anymore. Good luck with that. Or as they say in the South, bless your heart. Naomie calls, and asks if he’s finished everything. She’s picking up donations, and headed to Shep’s place. Craig tells Landon that Shep is going out of town for a wedding, and can’t make it to the upcoming polo match.

Shep gives Naomie his donation. The fundraiser is for the people of Haiti, and Shep wonders if Craig even knows where that is.

He knows where the good shrimp are though. His lunch looks fantastic.

Naomie asks Shep what happened at Landon’s website launch. He says he hoped he gave her constructive criticism. Naomie asks if he made her cry. Shep tells her that sometimes Landon gets ahead of herself and needs to be knocked down a peg. I thought he was very diplomatic and gave her good advice.

Craig tells Landon it wasn’t Shep’s place to tell her that stuff, and Landon thinks he was being a bully. Craig says when Shep lectured him, he felt like he was on the playground in sixth grade. He was definitely harsher with Craig, but even though I didn’t entirely agree with what he said, I thought it was out of concern.

Naomie says part of her is like, f-u to Shep, but in his interview, Shep says friendship means sometimes telling someone what they don’t want to hear. Probably the other part of Naomie knows that’s true. Shep asks what he should do, just let his friends get more delusional?

Whitney exercises pug Chauncey, while Patricia packs a suitcase without Michael, who’s on vacation. She says you can never be undereducated or underdressed according to Oscar Wilde. Whitney tells her that he’ll hold down the fort. He tells Patricia that Chauncey needs Jenny Craig, and she wonders if she should invent Spanx for dogs.

Kathryn has an appointment with a modeling scout. She’s modeled in the past, and wants to get back in the game. The scout asks for pictures, but Kathryn says she needs to update her portfolio. Using her tablet, she shows the scout a bunch of photos from back in the day. She says Kathryn is older now, and will be in a different bracket. She needs new photos, and the scout encourages her to get in the best shape that she can. She also suggests Kathryn doing a shoot with her children, because agencies are looking for the family thing. In her interview, Kathryn says this is the ultimate punch in the gut, since she can’t even see the kids right now.

Thomas practices saluting Landon in the mirror. In his interview, he says had he pursued someone more mature than Kathryn, his life might be different. He hopes it isn’t too late. Landon arrives, and Thomas makes drinks. Landon says she hasn’t been at his house since the night he kicked them all out. We flash back to that. Best. Night. Ever. Thomas suggests sitting on the porch.

Landon says it was good to hear from him. Thomas tells her that he wants to do an event at the plantation, and he’d like her input. He also wants to catch up. She says with the rumor mill churning, she didn’t even want to be around him in public. She thinks the dust has settled now, and they can be friends and do things together again. In her interview, she says the only thing she’s after is companionship. She asks about Kathryn, and Thomas says she passed her drug test so she can have supervised visits. He says what he does with his personal life is none of her business. In his interview, he says he’d like to have a stepmother for his children. He tells Landon that he’s looking for a woman with a pleasant personality, and says she has no problem in that department. She laughs like a hyena. Thomas clearly has a different definition of pleasant than I do.

Naomie tells Craig that he’d do better in life if he got things done ahead of time. He tells her that he works better under stress – a favorite excuse of procrastinators – and not to take it personally. In his interview, he says he’s able to reason worry out of his brain, so he doesn’t get stressed. Oh brother. Although he’ll probably live longer than most of us. In the car, Naomie tells him about her conversation with Shep, and that she felt they behaved like adults, and understood where the other one was coming from. Craig says Shep is manipulative, like an abusive husband. He doesn’t think Shep making Landon cry was acceptable either. He says Shep is out of control. Huh?

The guys meet at a bar. They run into Thomas’s neighbor, who Shep has also hooked up with. Thomas says there’s a lot of cross-pollination in Charleston. She and Thomas are also cousins. And Thomas is also related to Shep. Now it’s getting creepy. Shep apologizes for not being able to make the polo match. He asks who’s planning it, and Thomas tells him Landon is, since she’s good at planning parties. Thomas thinks Shep is in love with her, and Shep nearly chokes. He says he’s forgotten more than Thomas has gotten, and is definitely not looking for a relationship.

They move on to another bar, where a female patron is having her 21st birthday party. Shep and Austen chat with her. Both Daisy and Whitney show up, and another girl named Bree, who just broke up with her boyfriend. In his interview, Austen says that he’s open to finding the right girl, but Shep, not so much. Bree takes Daisy to find some “real men” at the bar. I’m not sure what she means, but she’s flirting with Thomas. Did she mean old guys? From a distance, it looks like Thomas blows her off, and Whitney is like, wise choice.

Naomie and Craig get last minute preparations together for the fundraiser. Craig unrolls the background for the entrance. Naomie is in a really cute bathrobe with animal ears on the hood. Craig is digging around for a laptop mouse, and Naomi has to jet. Hey, there’s the cat. Maybe he can help Craig find the mouse. I had to.

Cameran, in another pair of incredible, HUGE earrings, visits Whitney. Whitney tries to get the dogs under control, and in her interview, she says when Michael is away, everyone has to fend for themselves, and it’s crazy. She tells Whitney that he’s like Kevin from Home Alone. Thomas calls. Whitney asks what was up with Daisy. Thomas says he doesn’t know, but he has to find a real woman. Cameran and Whitney agree. Cameran asks if he’s coming to Naomie’s fundraiser, but he doesn’t want any clashes with Kathryn. Whitney hangs up, and Cameran says Thomas has seen the light, and is on an upward projectory. I’m not even sure that’s a word.

Whatever Craig needs to print isn’t happening, and it’s 45 minutes until the fundraiser. It’s something for the silent auction, and Naomie is getting pretty nervous. Craig works on his hairdo, and talks to the cat.

Craig gets to the bar, and tells Naomie everything is fine. She looks through the bags, and says they’re missing some sheets, and she wants him to get them printed now. He complains that he’s the one getting screwed, and Naomie tells him he’s screwing himself, and not to blame other people. Yep. She looks at him like a fixer-upper, and that’s never a good idea.

Naomie has to hand write some things, which annoys her. In her interview, she says they have different planning styles. That’s one way to put it. She says everything always works out because there’s always someone to pick up the slack. She tells Craig that they’re cool.

Naomi’s parents are French, so the three of them throw shade at Craig in their native language. Her mother tells her all men are the same. Ha-ha! Everyone is drinking and having a good time. Landon’s friend tells her that she’s glad Shep isn’t there, since he made Landon cry. Landon says she doesn’t think he even has a real job. This is so stupid. It’s not even like she did cry over it. She didn’t listen to one thing he said, got mad, and stormed out. Everyone must tiptoe around this girl.

Whitney tells Cameran that Shep and Chelsea hooked up, claiming that Shep told him. Cameran isn’t too sure if Whitney is telling her the truth, since he’s a sick freak. She tells Chelsea what Whitney said, and Chelsea says Cameran knows she’d tell her. Whitney calls Shep, who denies saying anything of the sort. Whitney tells Cameran she looks hammered. Cameran thinks it’s time to go home.

Naomie talks to a friend of Craig’s from school who’s practicing law now. He says from the internet, it looks like Craig is a great gardener. Craig joins them, and says he thinks they went past their goal. He and Naomie love each other again.

Chelsea talks to Austen about his love life. She asks what he’s looking for in a woman, and he flirts, describing her. He asks for her number.

Next time, the polo match happens, Chelsea goes out with Austen, and Thomas won’t let Kathryn see the kids.

Vanderpump Rules – Reunion Part Three

Andy grills Stassi about her dating life, and she says she feels like a loser. Andy thought things with Peter might get rekindled after their kiss. They talk about the bachelor/ bachelorette weekend in NOLA. Katie says she’d wanted harmony, but was under too much stress. Schwartz says the angst about Tom and Ariana was a surface trigger. Tom says blah-blah-blah, and Katie says the only one she’d take relationship advice from in this room is Lisa. Good choice.

We revisit Jax’s apology to Stassi. Stassi says it wasn’t so much the cheating, but how it trickled down to other things. She was thrilled to hear him finally own it. Andy asks Brittany how she felt, and she says it was hard for her to watch, when she wants the same thing from him. Jax says he’s a better person since he met Brittany. Once again, the shoemaker’s kids go barefoot.

Andy asks Schwartz if there was any moment when he wasn’t drinking during the bachelor/bachelorette weekend. Schwartz says he was browned out for 80% of the trip. Jax says he never saw Schwartz so upset, and was afraid Schwartz was going to hurt himself. James points out that this is coming from Jax. We see Schwartz getting emo during the gator watching trip. Ariana says it’s the last thing she expected. Jax is called out for trying to get Schwartz to postpone the wedding. Tom gets all loud, talking about how Katie was running the show all summer, and the girls were all bowing down to her. Somehow this leads to a discussion about who looked the best in drag.

Andy points out how Kristen chose that moment to sit Schwartz down for a talk about the Vegas girl from the past. Kristen says if it hadn’t been for her, they might never have addressed the issue, and I have to agree that she has a point. It really made all the difference, and totally turned everything around. Kristen and Tom get into a heated exchange. Tom talks about how Kristen cornered Schwartz. Stassi talks about waking up to two guys in drag arguing about looking like Sia. Andy talks about the roller-coaster ride of emotion that Schwartz went through, and we see the clip of Tom calling him a battered wife. Andy asks if it ruined his bachelor party, Schwartz says you’d think it would have, and I laugh.

Kristen says no one understood how Katie felt, and Katie concurs that it was devastating. Katie says it was up to her to put the pieces back together along with Schwartz. Schwartz says that he inherited a lot of baggage as well. Lisa thinks it was ridiculous how Jax tried to convince everyone that Schwartz had slept with the past Vegas girl, even though they weren’t there. Schwartz says he didn’t remember, but doubts anything could have happened. Katie says she can move past it, but it took a long time to repair the trust. She pushed a lot of feelings aside that were still there.

Lisa says she had no idea how bad it was until she saw the show, although she knew things weren’t going well. She says she was right in originally turning them down to officiate. It was difficult because she loves them, but she couldn’t give a potential disaster her blessing. We flash back to the arguments between Katie and Schwartz in Vegas. Lisa says they’d lost respect for each other, and she wanted them to understand the seriousness of the commitment. Katie says they didn’t know how to get it back, and Andy says it was amazing to watch the turnaround. Ariana proclaims that they were meant to be together, and she knew it was going to happen. Schwartz says they’re the only original couple left. Andy wonders who’s next to get married.

We discuss the wedding weekend — $51,000 later. Lisa says it wasn’t the way she rolls, but nothing about it was conventional, and it was who they are. We flash back to Schwartz’s surprise of his triplet brothers arriving. He says it was one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for him, and he was really surprised. It meant a lot to his brothers too.

Andy points out that Katie kept her cool when her dress wasn’t quite fitting, and Katie says it was the only time she second-guessed the Taco Tuesday themed rehearsal dinner. Andy asks if she’s happy to be Mrs. Bubba Schwartz, and she corrects him that it’s Mrs. Bubba Maloney-Schwartz. Andy asks Lisa what was most emotional for her. She says Schwartz’s vows, and we flash back to that. Schwartz says he wrote the vows while the groomsmen were putting their suits on. We flash back to Tom using the dog as a hanky during the ceremony. Andy points out that even Jax got choked up, and Jax says how could you not? Well, I didn’t.

Tom and Ariana’s relationship is discussed. Ariana says he has all the feels, but she tends to retreat when he gets marriage-minded. Schwartz says it was one of the happiest days of his life, and he was happy to share it with everyone.

We move on to James’s DJ career. Andy reads a list of James’s woes, and we flash back to them. Jax was happy to get James thrown out of his gig. Kristen talks smack about James, and he tells her to shut up, telling her she’s irrelevant. She points out that he had a vodka/soda at lunch and he admits he did, but only one. Moving on.

Andy says Shay is going to join them, and Scheana gets a little weird about that. She says the break-up was for the best, but she doesn’t want to see him. During the break, Stassi tells Scheana that they have her back. Five…four…three…

Shay says he’s nervous. He’s living with his parents now, and we flash back to the wedding. He and Scheana haven’t seen each other in four months, and are still waiting for the divorce to be finalized. Andy asks if Scheana was consciously hiding their problems, and she says it was Katie’s wedding, and she didn’t want to bring her business into it. She starts to cry. She accuses Shay of lying to her about buying drugs. He denies it, and Scheana talks about him withdrawing money out of their account. He claims it was for the business, and says she always held the money over his head, since it was mostly hers.

Andy asks what happened when Shay decided not to come home the first time, and why he didn’t communicate. Shay says that Scheana doesn’t listen. Lisa says that even though she didn’t understand it, Scheana worshipped him, and her world revolved around him. Kristen says she saw Scheana trying hard, but it seemed like Shay had given up. Shay says he’d always been working toward something, and his band is going on tour with Bone Thugs-N-Harmony. Jax says they’re both good people, but it just didn’t work. Shay looks all wistful. Ariana says she feels like she’s never really heard from him; he just ghosts. She doesn’t hear from him now either. He just gets all teary and looks at the ceiling.

Shay says they grew apart. He quit drinking for a year, but was expected to still go out. Scheana says he said it was fine, and he says later on it got difficult. Andy asks when things went south, and Scheana says that three months in, she found out about the pills. She says she also caught him texting another girl. Tom asks Shay why, and Shay says maybe it was more than friendship, but he found a connection that he didn’t have with Scheana. Both Scheana and Shay say they’re uncomfortable.

Andy asks if there was more than sexting going on, and Scheana says it turned into other issues like a lack of communication. Shay talks about her running to Lisa on camera about his addiction, and not talking to him first. Scheana says he hurt her, and she hurt him back. Shay says he wouldn’t have brought up his addiction issues on the show, and he was forced to tell everyone. He says he’s been labeled now. Scheana says she’s a “home-wrecking whore,” and that you get labeled, and that’s how it is. She’s right. This is what they signed up for. When Scheana talked to Lisa, it was obviously a difficult, spontaneous moment. Scheana says she wouldn’t have divorced him, and stayed in a marriage that wasn’t great. Shay says he went along with everything and wanted to keep trying, but she divorced him on camera. Scheana says that she found out he was buying pills and lying to her again, and she was done.

Evil Andy asks if Scheana having a new boyfriend bothers Shay. Shay thinks it’s quick, but Scheana says he knows him from Instagram, and she’s been friends with him for over ten years. We see pictures. He’s pretty cute, and looks like a grown-up. Andy asks if Shay is seeing anyone, and he says he’s still technically married. Scheana says it’s just a piece of paper at this point. Shay says he’ll always love her and be there for her, but he’s over their relationship. Coming there was something he had to do. It was harder than he thought, but he’s glad he did it. Andy asks if Scheana gets closure from Shay saying he loves her and will be there for her. She says she thinks he’s in his happy place, and she’s in her happy place, so she’s happy for him, but nobody looks very happy. Andy says he hopes they have some peace. Schwartz says that the both of them are happier apart than they would have been together. They say good-by, and wish each other good luck. Shay leaves the magic circle.

In our final moments, Andy commends James on his 18-hour day, sitting next to Jax. That is way too long. I’d read that the Housewives reunions are 12-hours, and I think that’s too much. He asks Lisa about opening the new bar, and asking Tom to be a part of it. Tom says he gets emotional thinking about it, and will someone stop this guy from crying already? We flash back to Schwartz wanting to duck and run when Lisa suggested including him. Schwartz says he didn’t want to tarnish Lisa’s name, and Katie says he doesn’t know his potential. Andy says if they don’t get their act together, it will end up Lala’s Lounge instead of Tom-Tom. Andy shows a clip of Lisa and Stassi booty-bumping at the wedding.

We end with Ken, puppies, Peter, and cocktails. Giggy! Harrison! Schnookie! Peter with Pumptinis! Lisa toasts to everyone, and says she loves them, even though she doesn’t always show it.

🎂 I would love to see French bulldog Tubbers from Sweet Home Oklahoma get his own show. Pumps came to Tubbers’ birthday party dressed like a roaring 20s flapper, because she’d been told it was a costume party. She was the only one who was told that. My karaoke group once had a pajama night, and I was afraid I might be the only one who showed up in them. I wasn’t. The party for Tubbers was a surprise party, although it was hard to say whether he was actually surprised. This show reminds me of Don’t Be Tardy. It’s a lot of fun and not mean-spirited at all. You can’t help but smile while watching it.

🐮 An extra observation. After successfully pulling off this prank, Jennifer said, “If you mess with the bull, you’ll get the horns.” This is the second time I’ve heard that in as many weeks. Shep said it on Southern Charm last week. Is this a thing now?

 

Apr17

April 16, 2017 – A Curse is Lifted, Suicide Squad is Okay by Me, Potomac Goes to the Races & Atlanta Reunites

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

Once Upon a Time

In Neverland, the Lost Boys chase Hook. He slides down a hill and is surrounded. He says he has treasure and rum, but they want him to pay for what happened to Peter Pan. All of a sudden, the boys drop like flies. Tiger Lily is in the shadows with a blowgun, and reveals herself. She says she never expected to see Hook back again, and he says it wasn’t planned. He thanks her for the rescue, and she pokes him in the neck with a dart.

David tells Emma they never would have put her in the wardrobe if they’d known all this was going to happen. Henry tells her it’s going to be okay, and she says she knows. David tells Regina that the story can’t end like this; Emma can’t go into the final battle without her family. Regina says she’ll have to make do with just one of them. She’s working on breaking the curse, but it might be dangerous or life-threatening. David says whatever she has, it has to work. It’s not like it’s their first time. We flash back to a few other curses the Evil Queen has laid on them.

Snow/Mary strolls through parallel Storybrooke, but everyone is in bad moods. Archie claims Pongo is off gluten. She runs into Regina, and asks if there’s any news about a John Doe in the hospital. Regina says it looks like he may never wake up. Snow ditches the flowers she was bringing to the hospital, and sees a bloom through the cracks of the sidewalk.

Snow brings the flower to David. It makes purple sparkles in the air. The machine he’s attached to goes off, and he opens his eyes. He struggles to get out of bed, asking where the Evil Queen is. He says the guards stabbed him, and the curse brought them there. He tells “Mary” that Snow White is in there somewhere, and somewhere inside, she knows he loves her. She takes his hand, and calls him Charming.

In regular Storybrooke, Snow tells Regina that they have to do this now. Regina says it’s going to hurt. Zelena and Regina take the combined heart of Snow and sleeping David, and put the halves into a potion. When the hearts are done basting, the witches return them, but Snow keels over. Zelena says the magic weakened the hearts. A revived Snow says that Emma will have to fight the final battle without them.

At the parallel hospital, David asks for Grumpy’s help. Snow tells Grumpy (calling him Leroy) to pay no attention to this mental patient she found wandering around. Snow tells David that it’s called a curse for a reason, and everyone else doesn’t know about it. She gives him clothing to change into. He says he put Emma in the wardrobe, so she must be there too. She suggests they find Gold, and tells him to meet her at an abandoned farmhouse in an hour. Snow tells Regina that David was sleepwalking and headed into the woods.

In standard Storybrooke, David shows Emma a video Snow left. She says they have to work together. David tells Emma that her mother found a way to break the curse, but didn’t know it. He shows them a picture of some flower petals, and Zelena recognizes them as pixie petals. She tells them that the enemy is already there.

The Black Fairy shows up at Gold’s shop along with Gideon. Gold says Gideon concocted a ruse to bring the fairy there, and Gideon says that one day he might understand. Belle comes out from the back, and tells Gideon he can still come back to them. Gold tries to make magic, but the fairy stops him with the dagger. She says she practically invented dark magic, but she won’t force him to do anything. When he joins them, it will be because he wants to, and then they can be the family they were meant to be. She and Gideon disappear, poof! in a puff of silver smoke.

In strange Storybrooke, David goes to Gold’s shop. He doesn’t think Gold is under the curse, and wants to know where Emma is. Gold doesn’t know what he’s talking about. David says they’ll have to find Emma on their own, but Gold says maybe he can help. Hearing Emma’s name was the appropriate wake-up call, and now he gets what’s going on. David knows that Emma is destined to break the curse, but doesn’t know where she is. Gold tells him that the pixie dust can reunite anyone who shares true love.

Back in the sort of real world, David says they need Snow’s tracking skills to find the flower, so he has to go to sleep. He knows Hook is out there fighting for Emma too.

Tiger Lily smacks Hook awake. He’s tied up in a cave. He says someone’s life is depending on him getting out of there, but Tiger Lily needs him to deliver something to another realm. He says his love is in danger. She doesn’t believe he could possibly fall in love. She shows him a piece of driftwood and says it’s really a weapon, and the only chance of winning the coming war. He says it’s not their war, but she says there’s a great darkness on the horizon, and the Savior will die without it. He says that’s the woman he loves, and tells her to look in his pocket. She takes out the ring. Tiger Lily says the Black Fairy is in Storybrooke, and this is the Savior’s only hope to defeat her. Hook asks if she has any magic, and she says Pan might, but the Lost Boys outnumber them. He says they don’t stand a chance.

No one can find David in sleeping Storybrooke. Snow says they haven’t looked everywhere in the woods. Regina suggests Archie and Pongo check the mines. When they’re out of sight, Regina reveals an electrical box. She says the tunnel is rigged for demolition; one push it all comes down. She says Snow and John Doe are both awake, which means the curse isn’t working. Snow/Mary claims she was just doing her rounds at the hospital. Regina says Snow is a hero, who would never let the cricket die, but Mary has never stood up to her. She asks what it’s going to be. Snow clutches a pair scissors. The townspeople arrive, and Regina backs off of the box. Snow disappears.

Sliding sideways, Snow and Emma find a small field of pixie dust flowers. Snow says they grow in the presence of evil. The Black Fairy appears, and says she’s been waiting to meet Emma. They’ve been destined to clash since the beginning of time. Gideon joins them. Emma asks if this is it, and the Black Fairy says everyone will know when the final battle begins. Gideon makes the flowers disappear. Emma shoots an arrow at the Black Fairy and Gideon, but they both disappear, poof! in a puff of black smoke.

Tiger Lily explains to Hook that the weapon is what banished Black Fairy to the realm where she was trapped, and that she was once a fairy. Hook asks why she gave it up, like it was tennis or something. She says she failed in stopping the Black Fairy, so she hung up her wings, and took refuge in Neverland. She points out a tree that contains the sap Hook needs to find Emma. The Lost Boys are having a Burning Man Festival, and Tiger Lily shoots an arrow at them. They run after her. Hook hooks the tree and gets the sap. One of the boys sees him, and sounds an alarm. Hook gives his own shadow the driftwood to give to Emma. He drops down into a cluster of the Boys.

David and Snow meet at the farmhouse in parallel Storybrooke. She says Regina is on to them, and gives him the flower. Gold shows up. He says they’re awake, but everyone else asleep. Gold tells David that if they find Emma now, the curse won’t be broken, and everyone will stay asleep. He gives them a vial, and says it will put David and Snow back to sleep, and make everything right again. He says the potion is the only way forward.

In real Storybrooke, Emma knows she can’t change her destiny, and tells Snow it’s not their fault. Snow says there’s something she doesn’t know. They see a pixie dust flower peeking out from the snow.

In snoozing Storybrooke, Snow sprinkles the pixie dust into her hand. David tells her to think about Emma and let the magic do the rest. She throws the dust in the air, and a door appears. David opens it. They see young Emma in her bedroom, reading. Snow says if they go through the door, she won’t be the Savior. David tells her that Emma will have new destiny with them. Snow remembers that Regina said Snow is a hero who wouldn’t let anyone suffer to get what she wants, and she’s right. She can’t sacrifice everyone else’s happiness for her daughter. She says everyone is separated from those they love, and they can’t sentence them to that forever. They have to believe that Emma strong enough to grow up without them. David wishes she wasn’t right. Snow tells Emma that they’ll see her again, and closes the door.

She tells David there isn’t much time, and starts to cry. She didn’t think they’d be saying good-by so soon. He says he’ll always find her. She says one day, Emma will find them. They kiss. He drinks the potion, and falls asleep. Then Snow drinks it.

Regina messes with the pixie dust in original Storybrooke. She gives it to Snow, and Hook’s shadow flies in, and gives her the weapon. She asks where Hook is, and the shadow drops his hook at her feet. She says there’s something wrong, and asks where he is again. The show touches her cheek and disappears. Henry says they’ll find him. She says they don’t know where he is. Snow says the magic can open the door to Hook, and explains how they used it in the past. Emma says they had to do what was right for everyone else. Snow says today she’s putting Emma first. She says they can’t allow Hook to be taken, after they’ve already taken so much. Not before the final battle.

The Lost Boys sentence hook to death for his crimes against Peter Pan. The door appears, and Emma pops out. She and Tiger Lily kick ass. Emma and Hook go through the door and Tiger Lily jets.

Emma gets Hook back to Storybrooke, and says she got his message. He says he should never have run away, but she says tells him that she didn’t make it easy. He says there’s something he has to do before he gets pushed to another portal. He takes out the ring and proposes. He says he’ll always be by her side. She says no. Just kidding. She says yes, and they kiss. He puts the ring on her finger. He says it’s time he faced her father, but David is asleep. Emma explains that they went into a sleeping curse so she could save him.

Regina says there might be another way, but it’s risky.

Everyone gathers together. Regina says once Snow and Charming had a chance to find their own happiness, they chose the good of everyone there. She wants the people to do something for them now. She shows them a chalice, and says if they share the curse, they might dilute its power. Hook takes a sip; then Regina and Emma. The chalice is passed around. Grumpy says he could use a nap. These people are taking some pretty big sips. It must be an endless cup.

Snow and David’s eyes open. They hug and kiss. He says she did it, and she says she didn’t do anything. They find Hook and Emma asleep, but they slowly wake up, along with everyone else. Hook asks if Emma told David his secret. David says Hook is a changed man now, and they’ve all seen it, and everyone is all happy. Regina says it wouldn’t have worked if Snow hadn’t inspired them – she gave up her family. Snow says she did it for a better one, and they’ll defeat the Black Fairy. She tells Emma that she won’t be facing the fairy alone.

Gold meets the Black Fairy. He asks why she gave the dagger back to him. She tells him that he has to choose to be part of this family. He says she has Gideon’s heart, and tells her about Gideon keeping the flower alive as a way of resisting her. He has his mother in him. Gold says he’ll get Gideon’s heart back. The Black Fairy tells him that if he comes at her, there might be nothing left of the town when they’re done. He says he’s willing to pay that price.

Next time, Zelena isn’t afraid of the Black Fairy and vows to kills her, and an ultimate sacrifice will be made.

💣 Suicide Squad

Although I’d wanted to see Suicide Squad in the movies, it never happened. I really shouldn’t complain, since I have 500+ FIOS channels that I pay dearly for, and probably should watch something other than BRAVO. From what I’d read, this film was panned by the critics, but I enjoyed it a lot.

As a kid, I read both the Superman and Batman comics, as well as some other random ones. Doom Patrol was, and remains, my favorite. By the time these characters came along, my comic reading days were long gone. Out of the Squad members, Harley Quinn got high marks, as she brought to mind another favorite from back in the day, Batman’s Poison Ivy. When my friends and I used to act out our comic books – what do you expect from someone who started The Rocky Horror Picture Show cult? – I was always Poison Ivy. Since I’m not part of today’s comic scene, I had no expectations, which might have made a difference in my perception. I had no reference material to compare this with.

The plot was okay. It dragged in spots, and the whole Enchantress business isn’t exactly my thing, but while plot can be a plus, that’s not my reason for watching an action picture. I’m there for the action, colorful characters, and maybe a few good one-liners. On that, the movie delivered.

I also liked the subplot of Deadshot’s relationship with his daughter, and thought Will Smith’s performance was excellent. The costumes, the explosions, the effects – it was all good. And the soundtrack was fabulous. There was a lot of noise about the Joker not being in it all that much, compared to his presence in the previews, but I thought it was just enough. Jared Leto’s portrayal was so over-the-top, any more of it would have been overkill. I’d also heard that he took his Joker persona into his off-time on set, which gave it an extra eww! for me, since I find actors who do that rather creepy.

It’s on rotation on HBO now. If you’re paying for it, might as well watch it. It’s a lot of fun and you could do worse.

🏛 On tonight’s The Real Housewives of Potomac, the ladies went to the Preakness, and of course wore hats. I went to the Belmont Stakes once. I’d never been to the racetrack before, and was surprised that a race takes about two seconds. I didn’t wear a hat, and I didn’t win anything, except a drunk guy trying to pick me up outside of the ladies room. True story. Ashley is finding out that the restaurant business isn’t as easy as she thought, like every single restaurant owner on Kitchen Nightmares. Charisse is having some renovations done on her house, and I have to admit that I sometimes wonder what it’s like to be wealthy enough to be able to add a “fierce champagne room” to my home.

🍑 The excruciatingly long, four-part The Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion has begun. The women all look gorgeous, although I’m not loving Porsha’s dress. It looks like she’s wearing a kimono ten sizes too big for her. A sparkly kimono. Sheree also keeps pulling up the top of her strapless number. Is she wearing She by Sheree? Although dumb as a post, Porsha got my vote for quote of the night: Andy…he’s messy. Out of the mouths of stupid. Things didn’t start escalating until almost the end, when Kandi and Porsha started to get into it. Most of the show was nonsense talk, but it looks like Porsha will be the one walking off this reunion. Probably not next week. I’m guessing that’s the carrot being dangled to get us to watch all four parts.

Apr15

April 14, 2017 – Sonny Blames Jax, Some Quotes & a Little Culture

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Before the show, there’s an ad for it with Dillon and Kiki. They’re so made up, I don’t recognize them at first.

Lulu asks Charlotte what she’d like to do, and Charlotte says have a tea party next time. Valentin shows up, and she runs to him.

Lucy asks Dante to perform in the Nurses Ball. He says no, like he does every year. He wants her to clarify something about the robbery, and asks if she saw the robbers take a bottle of prescription pills.

Kiki is working on a sample quiz for a class, but Dillon is distracting her. He tells her that food and sex are basic needs, and he’s helping her out.

Sam and Jason take Danny to the park for an egg hunt. He wants to find a special egg for Scout. Alexis joins them. She says the good news is, she’s not drinking, but every time she convinces herself that Julian is gone, something happens to make her question it.

Jax brings Carly flowers. He asks how she’s feeling, and she says about Sonny or him?

On the docks, Sonny relives one of his many arguments with Carly. Michael is checking out some real estate, and asks what he’s doing there. Sonny says he’s thinking of going to South America and meeting with his business partner. Michael thinks that’s sudden, but Sonny is afraid if he sticks around, he’ll kill somebody.

Kiki tells Dillon that at the top of her hierarchy of needs, is passing her class. Dillon backs off, but then returns. He wants to try out his new camera. Kiki says he’s needy, and he says he’s a Quartermaine. She says if she can finish fifteen questions, she’ll play outside with him.

Lucy tells Dante that the robbery is a blur, and she doesn’t want to dwell on it. Dante says the pills belonged to Morgan and shouldn’t have been there. He asks her to look at a picture of the bottle. Like she doesn’t know what a standard amber prescription bottle looks like. She says she’s late for a meeting with Ava, and like the Candyman, Ava appears as soon as Lucy says her name. Lucy tells Dante that they’re continuing their conversation about an important piece of art. Dante says that he thought they’d been talking about the Nurses Ball.

Lulu says Valentin is early. Charlotte tells him about the bunny. She shows him the eggs that Lulu painted and drops one. Charlotte is upset that she cracked the egg, so Lulu slams one on the floor, saying they can make egg salad now. Charlotte asks if they eat that at tea parties, and Lulu tells her that they’ll find out on her next visit.

Alexis tells Sam about the missing photo. She thinks it was of her and Julian.

Michael asks if Sonny told Carly that he didn’t sleep with Nelle, but Sonny says she was focused on Jax. He says he didn’t cheat on Carly, but she cheated on him.

Carly arranges the flowers and thanks Jax. He says it’s the least he can do after the trouble he’s caused. She says she knows he doesn’t mind that she and Sonny are fighting, and he tells her that he hopes she’ll see the light. She says she’s still furious with Sonny, and Nelle is a lying snake. The lying snake rings the doorbell. She’s also gotten highlights, so Valentin must pay well.

Lulu says they still have ten minutes, and Charlotte says her papa is there. Lulu thinks he wouldn’t mind, but Charlotte wants to go home. She thanks Lulu for the Easter basket. Valentin and Charlotte leave, and Lulu asks Mrs. Watkins how it went.

Ava tells Dante that she’s donating a piece of art to the ball; she does it every year. Lucy says she can count on the Jerome gallery. Dante asks Lucy about the pills again, but she says she doesn’t know anything, and is sorry for his loss. He says he’ll be seeing them both soon.

Dillon takes pictures of Kiki. He says she’s going to be a great nurse’s aide. He asks if she’s nervous about the Quartermaine party.

Sam wonders if the photo just fell out of the album, but Alexis says she wouldn’t have said anything if she thought that. Jason asks if there were signs of a break-in, but Alexis says Julian could have used his own key.

Michael asks Sonny if it’s really too late, and if Carly recommitted to Jax. He says maybe they can forgive each other now that the truth is out.

Carly is like, oh, look who’s here. Nelle says that Carly needs to know what she did was because of her father, who raised her to hate Carly. Jax says it’s his fault. Nelle says she believes him, but wouldn’t change anything because Josslyn is alive. She says now that Carly knows, maybe she and Sonny can get back together. Carly says she doesn’t give a damn. He lied and covered it up, but she doesn’t want to discuss it with Nelle. Nelle used Morgan’s death to target them. She used the worst possible grief, and Carly is going to make her pay.

Michael thinks maybe they just need time, but Sonny says when it comes to Jax, he can’t forgive and forget. Michael says Jax just wanted to save Josslyn’s life. Sonny is ignorant of what happened, so Michael explains that Jax is the one who made the deal for the kidney. Sonny says that Jax unleashed Nelle into their lives.

Carly asks if that’s Nelle’s angle – she’s not a home-wrecking slut after all. Jax tries to intervene, and says they still owe Josslyn’s life to her.

Valentin takes Charlotte out for a snack, and they discuss egg hunts. He says they can have one on the back lawn at Windemere. Charlotte misses her mom, and Valentin says he’s sorry. She wonders how Lulu can be her mother when she already had one.

Lulu talks to Laura on the phone, and Dante comes in. Lulu is crying, and tells him that they’re happy tears.

Dillon tells Kiki that his mom has been uncharacteristically pleasant since her trip, and she’s excited about planning the engagement party. Kiki wants to change, and Dillon is staying to take more photos.

Sam and Alexis discuss how the picture might have disappeared. Jason says he’s sure there’s a simple explanation for everything. Danny gives Alexis some fake flowers, and says he picked them for her. Someone is watching them. But seriously? They couldn’t afford real flowers? I guess they blew the flower budget on Carly’s bouquet.

Dillon takes some pictures, and joins Alexis and company. He says he hopes they didn’t mind him taking photos, and they all want copies. Sam looks at the pictures and says they’re great. She downloads them to her phone, explaining that this is how you do it in the digital age.

Jax says Frank spoon-fed Nelle lies. Carly says she used them against the family. Jax feels equally to blame, and says he should have come forward. He says he could never put a price on what she did, but can give her money for a fresh start. Nelle says she can’t accept it. Jax doesn’t understand. She says all the money in the world can’t change what they did, but if she doesn’t try to undo the damage she’ll never forgive herself. Carly tells Jax not to give in to Nelle’s sanctimonious crap; she’s staying for Michael.

Michael explains Jax’s part in buying the kidney to Sonny. He says that Jax did what he had to for Josslyn. Sonny says he knew everything and didn’t say a word.

Valentin says Claudette loved her very much, but she was created in a way that makes her super special, and also makes Lulu her mother. He suggests Nina can help him answer her questions when they get home. Charlotte is glad he married Nina and that she’s her new mommy, but she feels bad. She liked being with Lulu.

Lulu tells Dante about the visit. She says there’s hope that her daughter is going to learn to love her. Dante is happy for their family, and happy to see her smile again. He says almost everything is right in the world. She asks if there’s something wrong.

Lucy can’t believe she got dragged into this mess. Ava says she should have taken the first offer, and none of this would have happened. She tells Lucy to keep her mouth shut, and Dante will move on. Lucy says they’re talking about his brother’s death, and she’s not going to perjure herself because Ava was hooking up with Morgan. Ava tells her not to forget who she is and where she came from. She can make Lucy disappear – and will.

Sonny says he thought he and Jax had agreed on something for once – not wanting Nelle around. Now he knows why. Jax was afraid Nelle knew something. He stayed quiet, covered his ass, and they had to deal with the fallout. He says Carly knew, and slept with him anyway. He stalks off.

Carly says instead of hurting her, Nelle’s new goal is to get Michael back. What she did to Sonny is dicey, but they didn’t have sex. Jax says if she changes her mind let him know. Carly says she wants a bigger payoff. She should know, because Nelle is like Carly used to be. She says Nelle doesn’t deserve Michael, but he was dropped into her lap. She’s not passing up the best thing that happened to her, and she’s working on damage control. She’s working the victim card big time. Nelle says she meant what she said; she wants to make amends. Carly says go for it, but Michael is still too good for her. She’ll never get her hooks into him. She tells Nelle to get out. Jax asks if she feels better.

Valentin asks why Charlotte is upset, and Charlotte says it’s not fair to Nina and her mommy. She says Valentin doesn’t like Lulu. He says it’s true they don’t get along, but she can feel however she wants. He’s sorry for confusing her. She says she didn’t like Lulu before, but she was nice today. He says she wanted Charlotte to have a good time and Nina will be thrilled.

Lucy wonders if Ava would really go that far. Ava says Sonny will make Morgan’s death her fault. Lucy says her affair pales in comparison, so there must be more to it. She asks what’s the real reason that Ava had the pills

Dante explains to Lulu that the pills showed up in the robbery evidence. Morgan was there the night he died, but it’s six months later. He says that Ava is acting squirrely, and he’s going to figure it out.

Alexis and Sam look at the photos on Sam’s phone. Alexis wants Dillon to take a Christmas card photo. Jason takes the phone. He sees someone in the background, and says it looks like the guy in the security footage.

Kiki arrives for the party. Dillon tells her she looks perfect (and she does), but she says that she’s nervous. She says she knows the Quartermaines yelling at each other is a cherished tradition, but it makes her jittery. They kiss, and Dillon says they have time before the party. He takes her upstairs.

Lucy asks what the real story is. She saw Ava’s relief in throwing the pills in the trash, and Scotty was desperate to get them. Ava says if Sonny knew that she and Morgan were seeing each other, her life would be over. Lucy doesn’t believe that Ava would land in jail for rekindling the romance, so why is she so frightened? She asks what Ava did. Ava tells her to let it go.

Nelle sees Valentin and Charlotte. She asks if Charlotte wants to go to the park, but Charlotte wants to go home. Valentin says Nina has a tea party waiting. Charlotte says next visit they owe Lulu another ten minutes.

Lulu tells Dante that if she can make progress with Charlotte, he can get answers about his brother. Michael calls. He says there’s a problem. It’s Sonny.

Carly gets that Jax feels guilty, and he’s not wrong, but Nelle had better stay away from Michael. Jax says it’s not up to her. She says that Michael is kind and forgiving, and Nelle is a user. She’s just like Carly was. Jax says she doesn’t destroy what she loves; she fights for it. Sonny bangs on the door.

He walks right in past Carly, points at Jax, and says it’s all his fault.

Jason messes with the picture, making it bigger. Julian’s face is peeking out of the bushes.

On Monday, Carly wants Sonny to get out of her house, Tracy hangs the painting, and Jason has an idea.

Quotes of the Week

The most effective way to do it, is to do it.   – Amelia Earhart

You hate, while I’ll be great. – Kandi Burress, The Real Housewives of Atlanta

It’s pretty hard getting in the refrigerator. I’m standing on a heater that’s fallen over. – a hoarder on Hoarding: Buried Alive

🐸 And because I watched a V marathon recently:

I might bring down the neighborhood, but they’ll eat it. — Ham Tyler (Michael Ironside)

You!

You used to call me Mike. – Christina (Jenny Sullivan) and Mike (Marc Singer), respectively

Some culture to send you off on your weekend…

SundayInThePark

Sunday in the Park with George – Georges Seurat

Apr14

April 13, 2017 – Charlotte Visits Lulu, Survivor Outs a Contestant, the Kids Wellington Some Beef & a Random Thought

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Brad tells Monica the hospital is leaving itself open to a lawsuit because of an impaired doctor.

Hayden brings Finn a fresh shirt. He wants to talk to Monica about going to rehab.

Ned asks Olivia if she’s ready for a surprise. He told his mother they were engaged, and she said she’s happy for them. Olivia wasn’t expecting that, and Ned says he thinks she’s being genuine. Olivia says their most challenging test is still ahead of them.

Lulu lets Rocco go on a playdate, so as not to overwhelm Charlotte. She has scones, toys,  and arts and crafts. She tells Dante she feels like she’s forgetting something, and he suggests breathing. She’s sure Valentin will screw things up.

Nina tells Valentin that she believes him about everything, but when it comes to Anna he sees what he wants to see. Anna listens in on their conversation. Valentin says he doesn’t trust Anna. She’s part of his past and he can’t change that, but his priority is his family, namely her and Charlotte. He says the social worker is coming to pick up Charlotte, so she has to get ready. Nina notices his new watch, and asks where he got it.

Ned tells Olivia whatever she wants to do in planning the wedding is up to her. She says she was talking about her son, and she doesn’t mean Leo. I had to think about that for a minute.

Lulu goes on to Dante about how Valentin will probably sabotage all their visits. Dante says telling her not to worry would make him feel like a hypocrite. She’s relieved to know she’s not scared by herself. She suggests they put her nervous energy to good use. They kiss.

Anna talks to herself, saying that Valentin doesn’t want his wife to know he gave her the watch. Valentin tells Nina that he bought it himself. He apologizes for not talking to her about Anna. He says he should have been straight with her the way she always is with him. She tells him that she went to see Anna. Anna laughs to herself, remembering slamming Nina’s head on the desk, and I’m disliking her more every second. Her doorbell rings. It’s Andre.

Hayden tells Finn that she’s the money person, and even she thinks Monica is reasonable. With him, she’ll be talking to another doctor. Finn tells her he appreciates the pep talk, but has to face the reality that this could hurt his career. She says the hospital wouldn’t be open if not for him, and if Monica doesn’t factor that in, she doesn’t deserve him.

Finn sees Brad come out of Monica’s office. Monica tells him to come in. She says she wants a private conversation.

Hayden sees Brad and tells him he got his request for lab equipment. He says she can find the money for that, but not the people who operate it. He gripes about not getting a raise, and she says he wasn’t singled out. He says maybe if a hotshot doctor got fired, there would be more money, and it couldn’t be happening to a more deserving jerk.

Monica tells Finn that she just had a difficult conversation with Brad. He asks if his name came up. She says she doesn’t give credence to gossip. Finn says his decision to confess is probably too late, and he should have come to her sooner. He tells her that he’s an addict.

Anna apologizes for not picking up Andre’s call. He says he’ll come back, but she says she can take a break.

Valentin doesn’t suggest provoking Anna, since she’s a trained agent. Nina says she made it clear that Anna should keep her hands off her man. Charlotte comes in, whining that she doesn’t want to go on the visit.

Lulu tells Dante that the deck is stacked against them, but they’ll make it through it. Dante asks if she wants him to stay, but she tells him next time.

Charlotte says she’s busy having a bear tea party. Nina says she’s going to have her own tea party with her pony friends. She tells Charlotte that it will take her a while to prepare, but by the time she comes back, it will be ready. Valentin talks to Charlotte in French, and she goes with the case worker. Damn. I’d rather live with them than Lulu.

Ned doesn’t think Dante is going to have a problem with them getting married. Olivia says he’s protective, and Ned asks if he’s a momma’s boy. She says he has high standards, and Ned says too bad he didn’t talk to him first. Olivia says it might take time, but he’ll come around. No time like the present, since Dante appears.

Hayden asks Brad who’s getting fired. He tells her that the odds of a two-income household in her future are slim.

Finn explains everything to Monica. He says he intended to quit when he was cured. He tried, but was dependent. She says she had no idea, but she’s glad he came to her. He’s surprised that Brad didn’t say something, but she says she doesn’t go on what Brad has to say. Finn says that he thought he could detox himself – not one of his better ideas. He tells her about trying to score at the docks, and that he took meds from the hospital on one occasion. His patients never suffered, but that had more to do with his dumb luck. He knows he’s in no position to ask, but wonders if he’s out of a job. She says that’s the least of his problems.

Lulu greets Charlotte. Mrs. Watkins tells Lulu to pretend she’s not there. Lulu suggests they check out the playroom, but Charlotte says no thanks. Lulu moves on to the swing-set, but Charlotte doesn’t like swings. Lulu says they can do whatever she wants. What Charlotte wants is to go home.

Nina asks if Valentin wants to talk about Anna, and understands if he’s angry that she went to see her. He says he wonders if Anna legitimately wants peace, but it doesn’t matter; there’s not much she can do to him.

Anna tells Andre that she was listening to Mozart on the computer, and asks if something is troubling him. He says he bumped into Jordan with Curtis, and he’s not sure if it hurt more because he misses her or because he knows that she really wanted someone else. Anna suggests time and comfort food will be the cure. She asks if he wants some tea. She goes to the kitchen, and he listens on the earbuds. She comes back in, and he looks at her like she has two heads.

Anna asks what he thinks he’s doing, and Andre tells her that he thought it was Mozart. He says he’s not familiar with that requiem. He says instead he heard a private conversation between Valentin and Nina. He asks what she’s doing, and she says going on the defensive. She’s taking Valentin down.

Nina and Valentin play backgammon. He says she hates the game, and she says he hates losing the game. He’s worried about Charlotte, but Nina says Lulu isn’t going to do anything stupid with the case worker there. She tells him he’s not in it alone.

Charlotte tells Mrs. Watkins she wants to go home and doesn’t like it there. Lulu engages her, and they get in a conversation about scones. Lulu says she wants to make them for a party, but needs a mixer. Charlotte says she’ll do it if she can come to the party. That was quick, and I find it doubtful that Charlotte would have warmed up over making scones.

Brad tells Hayden that he told Monica about Finn’s addiction. He says Monica seemed surprised, but Hayden doesn’t. He asks how many millions in lawsuits she’s risked.

Monica tells Finn that dealing with his addiction has to be his first and only priority. He says he’s been looking at rehabs. She tells him to go today. Humble himself and seek help; he can’t do it alone. He says you’d think a doctor would know that already. She tells him that doctors are the worst addicts, because they think they’re above he rules since they create them. She says that she’s been sober since 2008, and. when he comes back, she’ll tell him all about it. She survived rehab; he can too. He asks if he’ll still be a doctor after he does.

Olivia wonders why Dante isn’t at the visit, and he explains they thought it might be too overwhelming for Charlotte. He notices her ring, and Ned tells him that he proposed. He asks if it’s a problem because Olivia didn’t think it would be an easy sell. Dante wonders what she told him. Olivia says she’s always relied on Dante, and now she’ll be relying on someone else. Dante says he just wants what’s best for her. Olivia says Ned is best for her. She knows he worries about her, and now he doesn’t have to. He says he’ll still worry, but it’s nice to know he won’t be the only one.

Monica says she’ll stop by for support once Finn has started his program. Hayden catches Finn before he leaves, and tells him that Brad knows everything. He says he should have given her credit for caring. He explains that he’ll have to go before a review board when he’s done with rehab, and if they approve, she’ll have him back. Hayden says it’s a start. He tells her that he only has one unresolved situation – what happens between them?Brad overhears, and shakes his head. Foiled again!

Lulu pretends to find an Easter egg, and tells Charlotte the Easter Bunny must have come early. They find a few more eggs, and she talks Charlotte into an Easter egg hunt. They go outside.

Valentin is worried, since Mrs. Watkins hasn’t called. I had to laugh at myself when Mrs. Watkins came to pick up Charlotte. Call me name-judgmental, but in my mind, the name implied a lady who looked like an old-fashioned grandma, and she’s nothing of the kind. She’s young and fashionable. Nina says Lulu never bothered to find out what kinds of things Charlotte likes, so as a responsible parent, Valentin should go over there and give her the information. That sounds like a terrible idea.

Andre says Anna is being aggressive. She says she’s learned there’s more to it. She pieced together the story with a WSB expert. Andre feels inadequate, since their sessions were thorough, but Anna says it was buried so deep, it took a lot to dredge it up. She says Valentin is a criminal, and she has to bring him to justice. Andre asks how she’s going to do that.

Brad accosts Monica. She says GH doesn’t show a staff member to the door because they’re ill, and they have a holistic policy if there’s a chemical dependency involved. She explains that a board will ultimately decide. Brad is livid that Finn isn’t losing his license. She tells him that all humans are flawed, and says that Finn’s research brought in the money to save the hospital. Crying before he’s hurt, Brad whines that Finn took all the credit, but Monica says he made it clear that Brad’s input was invaluable. She thanks him for his concern, and thinks that’s why Finn opened up. Brad might have saved his career, and even his life. I laugh as she shows Brad to the door. Foiled once more, but with kudos.

Finn tells Hayden that he doesn’t know how rehab will go. He doesn’t even remember how he is off of drugs. She might not like him sober. Hayden says get healthy, and deal with the rest later.

Olivia is shocked that Dante is giving his blessing to her marriage. Dante says they already talked; Ned wondered why she had turned him down. Dante says Ned is deserving of her, and welcomes him to the family.

Nina messes around with her collection of plush ponies. She looks at the note again. Then throws it out. She looks into the garbage can and reaches back in.

Anna tells Andre that if she wanted to kill Valentin, he’d be dead. He has to pay for his crimes legally. Andre asks how. She says she gets his version of the events, and can use it to get close to him. Lolling him into a false sense of security, and getting a confession. Andre says she’s playing a dangerous game. Anna says it’s her job, and she’s told him too much already. She doesn’t want him involved. If Valentin sees through her, he’ll retaliate, and she doesn’t want Andre to get hurt. She tells him not to tell anyone, and makes him promise.

Charlotte and Lulu come in talking about the bunnies they saw outside. Valentin arrives.

Nina sees the watch box. She puts to and two together. She reads from the note, saying, time heals all wounds. Good episode.

Tomorrow, Jason talks to Alexis, Dante asks about Morgan’s pills, Nelle wants to talk to Carly, and Sonny wants to kill someone.

🌴 Re the Survivor outing debacle. Unless you live on the moon, by now you’ve heard about the outing of transgender Zeke Smith by Jeff Varner during tribal council. While personally, I file this under who cares? I can’t believe that I haven’t seen one person propose that this might have been a set up for an old, tired show that should have been canceled years ago. First of all, none of that needed to be aired. Take it from me, I’ve been on a reality show myself, and editing is freaking magic. Secondly, Jeff Probst knew that Smith was a transgender. Apparently, so did half of the internet. In nosing around, trying to find out how Varner knew, I got no definitive answer, but took note of the fact that this has been an online topic of conversation for a loooong time. Funny how suddenly, this worn-out program that hasn’t been relevant for a while, is a topic of conversation everywhere, and is now current. It’s common knowledge that Survivor manipulates its contestants. (At one point, I was nearly convinced that Probst was the Antichrist.) At the end of the day, this seems as though it will be a win for everyone except Varner. Just sayin’.

👶 Will someone please give the father of the “Cash Me Outside” brat custody of her, before she ends up dead in an alleyway somewhere? I don’t have kids, nor do I fawn over those who aren’t in my life, but the attention that she’s getting for bad behavior, is disturbing even to me. She is not going down a good path, and she’s only 13 years old.

🍜 Tonight, the MasterChef Junior kids split into teams and created gingerbread houses. I can’t even make a house of cards using graham crackers. Gordon and Christina dressed like Will Ferrell in Elf, and a live gingerbread man (chef Aarón Sánchez) joined the group. The kids got sprayed with icing, and a good time was had by all. The babes in cookland also made a holiday dinner using Beef Wellington as the entrée. One little girl said she’d never cooked it before, so she hoped it was “cooked with a miracle.” Honey, that’s how I always cook. Unfortunately, there was no miracle for her, and she and another kid had to go home. But I hope they take heed in what Gordon said, that they’re moving on to another chapter. Chef Sánchez also offered one of them a job, making a ten-year-old further along in his career than most adults I know. Next time, they’re down to eight and some sushi happens.

 

 

Apr13

April 12, 2017 – Anna Gifts Valentin, Sonja has a Mad Hatter Party & Bette is Still Feuding with Joan

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Anna leaves a note for Valentin saying she doesn’t want to be his enemy, and maybe they’ll learn that time heals all wounds. She’s also included a free watch.

Anna’s doorbell rings. It’s Laura. She wants to talk about Valentin.

Valentin examines the watch. Nina wants him to zip up her dress, but he’s hiding the watch and note behind his back, so he can’t.

Tracy wants to exchange the wall-hanging in the den for the painting. She tells Monica that she acquired the perfect piece.

Hayden tells Curtis that Finn disappeared. Not totally. He’s passed out in an alleyway, and looks kind of bloody.

Nina asks Valentin if he has a present behind his back, but Valentin tells her no. Nina thinks he’s lying. He tells her she’ll be disappointed, and he shows her the note. I don’t know if “disappointed” is going to be the right word. Valentin says that Anna came by and surprised him. Nina wonders why he didn’t tell her. He flashes back to Anna saying that their night together meant something. Valentin says she wanted to put past behind them. Nina asks if he believes that, and he asks if she does.

Laura tells Anna about Lulu’s canceled visit with Charlotte, accusing Valentin of sabotage. She thinks Lulu is too emotional, and Valentin can easily exploit that. Anna says they’ve made peace.

Monica tells Tracy that it’s her house. Tracy tells her to take pride in it then, and hang something worthwhile. Ned comes in, and she tries to get him on her side. Monica tells Ned he’s in charge while she’s at work, and if the tapestry is missing, take Tracy to a hotel.

Tracy shows Ned the covered painting. He says Larry wasn’t pleased about her skipping town without him. He tells her that he and Olivia-F are engaged.

At the hospital, Andre says it looks like Brad got good news. Brad says a condo he and Lucas had their eye on is available.

Hayden tells Curtis that Finn’s room wasn’t used last night. He says he’ll lecture her later on about enabling, but right now he’ll look for Finn. And this one is on him. She promises to keep her lips to herself, and says she’ll leave that to Jordan. Jordan appears, and says lucky her.

Finn is in the hospital. Griff wants to do a neurological test. Finn says he can’t feel his face, and tries to analyze things, but Griff says let him do the doctoring. (Is doctoring a medical term?) He has Finn do some simple tests to check his motor skills. He asks if Finn knows how he sustained the injuries. Finn says not really. Griff asks if he wants to tell the police what happened.

Nina says she barely knows Anna, and doesn’t like her. Valentin says she seemed remorseful, but he doesn’t totally trust her. Nina is concerned about Lulu’s visit, and Valentin says Charlotte isn’t going anywhere; Lulu is a loose cannon, and it will sink her. He suggests they go out afterwards, and Nina says sounds like a plan. Nina leaves for work, and Valentin calls someone, saying he has a job for them.

Laura reminds Anna that she thought Valentin was out to get her, but Anna says he had his reasons. She says in her past, she did some things that could be considered treason, and Valentin was a victim. She had no memory of it, and was suppressing it because she didn’t want to deal with it. She met with a WSB specialist who restored her memories. Laura says memory is flawed, but Anna says she’s sure it happened. She can’t take it back, so she needs to make it right. Laura says that Valentin doesn’t deserve compassion and mercy; he’s a cold-blooded murderer, who kept her granddaughter from her. He might not have deserved the past, but he deserves what he’s getting now. Anna understands, but says her part in the war is over.

Ned tells Tracy to go ahead and tell him that he’s making a mistake, but it won’t change anything. Tracy asks if Olivia-F makes him happy. Ned says she does, and Tracy says she’s happy for him, and congrats.

Hayden explains to Jordan that she kissed Curtis, but he had nothing to do with it. Jordan jokes around, asking if he wants to press charges. Curtis tells Hayden they’ll talk later, and Hayden leaves. Curtis tells Jordan that he was being a friend and got a sneak attack. Jordan says he doesn’t owe her any explanations; they’re not exclusive. Curtis thinks they should change that.

Griff tells Finn that he’s lucky to be alive, and the police need to know about him getting beat up. He adds that Finn isn’t in rehab, and must have gone to the pier to score. Griff accuses him of being high right now.

Ned asks what Tracy has done with his mother, and if she had a spiritual metamorphosis in Turkey. She tells him that she found her father.

Brad talks to Monica about some lab ideas, but the presentation has been postponed. He says as long as it doesn’t affect his raise. Monica says as a matter-of-fact, it does

Finn says the cops will only cause more problems. Griff says the problem he has is fixable, if he has the guts to do it. In the hallway, Griff sees Hayden, and tells her that Finn is there. She goes into Finn’s room, where he’s trying to get out of bed.

Jordan and Curtis kiss. Andre sees them.

Valentin is at the docks, talking to someone on the phone about finding suspicious stuff. Laura comes by. She accosts Valentin, telling him that it’s selfish not doing what’s best for daughter. He says he’s providing loving family, and Charlotte will always choose him and Nina. Laura accuses him of trying to psyche her out, and says nothing is going to work. Wow, if she considers that a psyche out, nobody is trying very hard. She says there’s nothing wrong with her memory, so he can’t prey on her like he did Anna.

Nina goes to Anna’s place. She asks if they didn’t have a conversation where Anna was supposed to stay away from her husband. Anna says they did. Nina attacks her.

Hayden asks Finn what happened. He says it was a rough night. She asks if he used, and Griff says his bloodwork is clean. Finn tells them that he paid for the drugs and changed his mind, but found out the hard way that drug dealers don’t do refunds. Griff asks why he didn’t say something, but Finn didn’t want anyone to know how low he’d gone. He thought about what Hayden said, and that at the end of the road maybe there’s a better life, and someone to share it with.

Curtis sees Andre, and tells Jordan, to be continued. He leaves, and Jordan approaches Andre. It’s awkward. She tells him that she wouldn’t blame him for being angry. He says he knows he can’t make someone feel what they don’t want to, and tells her not to feel badly about what she wants.

Anna gets the better of Nina. Nina says that Anna pushed her there. Anna says she has no quarrel with her, and Nina asks what’s up with the letter. Anna says it’s a declaration of peace, and asks if Valentin even saw it. Nina says showed it to her because they’re honest with each other. Anna just wants to end the feud. Nina tells Anna that after months of harassment, admit she’s after Valentin.

Laura says obviously Anna is confused, thinking she committed some wrong against him. He says they know each other well. Laura says she’ll do whatever it takes to make him pay. She tells him that it’s clear that Charlotte and Nina genuinely love him, so there must be something decent in him and worth loving, but she doesn’t think he believes or trusts it. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have to cling to it. She tells him that he’s afraid when they see who he really is, they’ll abandon him. He stutters, and tells her to get away from him. She says with pleasure, but he’ll see her again…soon.

Ned reads Edward’s letter. He asks Tracy why it matters what he thinks if it makes her happy. She wants to know what he thinks is missing. Ned thinks it’s bull. Tracy asks if he thinks Edward was lying, and Ned hopes not, for her sake. Ned says Edward should have told her this his entire life. He expressed his feelings by controlling and manipulating, and held the family hostage. Ned says he saw Edward clearly for what he was, not bad, but not always good either. Tracy says he was complicated. Ned says everything he did was for his own ends, and he doled out affection to whoever paid proper reverence. To stay in his good graces, you had to toe the line, which left Tracy at odds with him or in exile. If she believed he loved her, she wouldn’t need a letter.

Nina says first Anna is after Valentin, and now she wants to be friends. Anna brings up Nina’s past, and says her feelings are understandable, but she’s being needlessly territorial. Anna wants no further conflict. Nina tells her says no more notes, no more anything. She leaves, and Anna laughs to herself.

Valentin meets with guy on the docks. He says he’s found nothing, and gives Valentin the watch. Valentin says that’s reassuring, and messes with the watch some more.

Monica tells Brad that’s the way things are at the moment. She hopes that Hayden will loosen the purse strings soon. Brad wonders what Hayden has to do with it, and Monica says she’s the hospital’s financial advisor. Brad twirls his proverbial mustache.

Finn tells Hayden and Griff that he’ll go to rehab. Griff says there’s an outpatient service in town that’s good, and discreet. Finn says it doesn’t matter. He has to own up to who he is and what he’s done. He’s an addict. He says Monica needs to hear it from him.

Brad asks Monica when Finn is coming back, and she assumes when he finishes his paper. Brad says there’s something she needs to know about Finn. What I’m assuming is that Brad is going to tell her about Finn’s addiction, but I don’t see how this would get him anywhere. Wouldn’t he be better off trying to blackmail Hayden with that information?

Ned isn’t saying that Edward didn’t love Tracy in his own way. Tracy says his way was fine. Ned says she spent her life chasing his love, when she should have been comforted by it and felt it when he was alive. It’s the kind of love she deserved. He says that he’s proud of her, of the person she’s become, and he loves her with all his heart. Tracy tears up and so do I. She cries on his shoulder.

Laura talks to Lulu on the phone, and asks if she wants the good or bad news first. She says the good news is that Valentin isn’t as confident as they think; and the bad news is that they can’t count on help from Anna any more.

Anna’s phone rings. It’s Andre, but she doesn’t answer.

Curtis joins Jordan again. She has to get to work. He says he’ll walk her there, and they’ll talk about the date she owes him.

Andre leaves a message that he could use a friend, and asks Anna to call him back. Anna is on the laptop and puts earbuds in.

Valentin puts the watch on. He smiles. We see Anna messing with the watch, and sewing a device into it. She hears Valentin and Nina talking. I just have to say it. That looked like something I could have easily found. You mean to tell me that Valentin’s guy noticed nothing?

Tomorrow, Andre asks Anna what she’s doing, Nina asks where Valentin got the watch, and Finn talks to Monica.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Sonja calls for chocolate. The doorbell rings. It’s new Wife, Tinsley. Sonja knows her from charities they’ve done together, and she’s going to be Sonja’s houseguest. You might know Tinsley from her arrest in the tabloids. Sonja tells her that she can stay as long as she wants. Tinsley doesn’t know whether she wants to live uptown or downtown.

It’s Halloween, and Bethenny tries on a sexy leopard costume. Carole arrives. Ramona joins them. Bethenny is surprised that Ramona didn’t acknowledge her dogs, and Ramona says Bethenny never sent her an announcement. Aww! They’re wearing pumpkin costumes. In her interview, Ramona thinks now that Bethenny has a boyfriend, she’s been ignoring her. Carole mentions her new kittens.

Carole asks if Ramona went to LuAnn’s bachelorette party, but she wasn’t invited. She tells them how LuAnn accused her of stirring the pot, and playing detective regarding Tom. They agree that LuAnn seems more than happy.

LuAnn has a Mad Hatter party to go to, so she goes with daughter Victoria to a millinery. While they try on hats, she tells Victoria about Sonja being stuck in the past. She thinks Sonja wishes that she was with Tom. We flash back to Sonja talking about her previous relationship with him. I’m thinking who didn’t have a relationship with Tom is probably a shorter list than who did.

Bethenny says that Sonja seems to be doing well. Ramona tells them about Tinsley moving in. She says Tinsley was a major socialite, and Bethenny brings up her stalking the ex-boyfriend. She says that Tinsley had the world at her fingertips, and crashed and burned. Carole is having an election night party, but Ramona says they’ll just argue. Carole wonders how that will be different from any other night. They talk about the Hillary email thing, because we will never, ever be able to get away from any of it for the rest of our natural born lives. And maybe even after that. I go ♫ La-la-la! ♫ Bethenny accuses Carole of being a know-it-all and elitist.

Back at Sonja’s place, Tinsley is excited about being back in New York. She’s anxious about regaining her life there. Sonja asks how she liked the play, and we see a clip of it. In her interview, Tinsley talks about her marriage to Topper Mortimer. I get a picture of Leo G. Carroll in my head. (Google it.) Sonja knows how it is to have everything golden, and then have it fall apart. Tinsley says she still wants kids, and has had her eggs frozen. They talk about criteria for a man, and Tinsley says he needs to have a job. Wow. For a socialite, she doesn’t ask for much. She talks about her relationship with the dude who called the cops on her. She thinks he was acting out because they weren’t going to be together. Tinsley says at least she had her lashes on in the mug shot, although her eyebrows were not on fleek.

Dorinda has invited Ramona to her cryotherapy session. Ramona shows up, but she’s dressed for a date, so she’s not actually partaking. She tells Dorinda about her lunch with LuAnn. She says she decided not to say anything about Tom. She says it’s obvious that LuAnn doesn’t want to know. I do though.

Dorinda talks about Sonja spreading lies about her, but Ramona says Sonja hasn’t said anything to her. In her interview, Dorinda says Sonja shouldn’t be saying anything about anybody, considering her colorful past, and she has to nip this in the bud. Dorinda goes into the freezing chamber or whatever you call it.

Tinsley has missed NYC. Yeah, me too. Worst. Idea. Ever. To. Move. She tells us about the Mortimers being one of the famous historical families there, and how you’re treated differently when you marry into one. She doesn’t have the invitations that she used to, but wants to be prepared, so she’s dress shopping. We see some of the fashion pages she’s been in, and she tries on this amazing formal dress with a delicate botanical pattern on it. She says it was almost the perfect life. She walked away, and she wants it back. Good luck with that after the mug shot thing.

Dorinda’s daughter Hannah is getting her own place, and they go furniture shopping. It takes three months for a couch delivery? Hannah says things are born, live, and die in that amount of time. Really. In her interview, Dorinda is glad Hannah is moving out before it turned into an Edie Beale situation. She’d be eating out of a tuna fish can, and Hannah would be wandering around in a ballerina outfit. Omg, that’s too funny.

Bethenny says that clutter is the devil incarnate. I tend to agree, although I’ve yet to conquer it. She sends a lot to Dress for Success. She talks to her assistant about her boyfriend, Dennis. She says it’s been difficult with the suckerfish Jason Hoppy stuff going on (I refuse to put his name in bold), and she’d like to be more engaged in her new relationship. She thought all that would be over by now. Like any normal person would think.

Sonja is getting ready for her Mad Hatter party. The dress code is, wear color. She tells us that’s how you set the tone for a party. She wants everything to be perfect, because she knows how the girls can be in picking at someone. She says that they want you to be successful, but not more successful than they are. Tinsley shows up wearing black. So much for the party’s tone.

Commercial break with horrifying information. The Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion will be in four parts. Here’s hoping that Porsha loses her sh*t again.

Ramona is also wearing black. She asks why Sonja didn’t invite Dorinda, and Sonja makes some vague comments about why should she? In her interview, she tells us it’s all about the Berkshires. Carole arrives, wearing black and white.

Bethenny is on her way. Wearing colors! But the friend she’s bringing is in black. What is wrong with these people? Ramona chatters away to Carole about not wanting to invite Sonja to her house because of her altercation with Dorinda. She was hoping they’d make up today. Inside, Tinsley instructs Sonja on applying lashes. Ramona is wearing a scarf (also black), and moves on to saying how much she likes hickeys. Bleh. Thanks for the visual. Carole talks about how informed she is about politics, and won’t hear that Ramona might also be informed. I might not think so in Ramona’s case either, but I have the feeling that’s how Carole feels about everyone else in the world.

Bethenny says she looks like a piñata at somebody’s funeral. HA-HA! Even Sonja is wearing a floral-patterned dress with a black background. Tinsley says she’s trying to be open to the new people she’s meeting, but she doesn’t get a friendly vibe from Bethenny. Has she seen the show? I’ll bet they watch it in jail. LuAnn is wearing color and a hat. She and Bethenny say hello, but the conversation is stilted.

Ramona asks if Tinsley is seeing anyone, and she says no, but it would be nice to be married again. They didn’t have children, only Chihuahuas, and Ramona asks if she regrets it. Tinsley says she’d still like to have them, and tells Ramona about the arrest. She feels the need to bring it up early on, before someone hears about it elsewhere. Ramona says she’s got balls.

LuAnn and Sonja sit inside to talk. LuAnn says she’s been reading negative things in the paper about herself that have come from Sonja. Apparently, she’s been saying that even if the marriage turns out to be a bust, she’ll be there for LuAnn. Somehow, Sonja turns the tables to talking about Ramona, and how she’s turning Dorinda against her. In her interview, LuAnn says Sonja is coming off like she’s jealous. LuAnn tells her to quit dwelling on the past. In her interview, Sonja says LuAnn only hears what she wants to hear. LuAnn tells Sonja that she’s happy, so back off.

Ramona says any relationship that ends, isn’t easy. Bethenny says she’s familiar with that. Yep. Bethenny asks about Dorinda. She thinks Sonja needs to drop the Berkshires, Tom and the townhouse. She tells Ramona that the invite said to wear the colors of Wonderland, and Ramona looks like she’s going to a funeral. A dressy funeral. NYC is the capital of black clothing, but since I always had pets, I rarely wore black. Mostly grey, so the car fur would just blend in. Oddly enough, I’m not a huge fan of black.

Tinsley says she falls in love easily and makes her men into projects. She tells them about the list Sonja is making for her. In her interview, Carole says Sonja isn’t the person she’d go to for man advice. Tinsley loved meeting Ramona and Carole, but feels Bethenny wasn’t receptive.

Sonja and Bethenny discuss what designer LuAnn is wearing. Sonja tells Bethenny that it’s Ralph Lauren, and Bethenny says she thought it was Laura Ashley. Sonja’s borrowed butler suggests Salvation Army, and Bethenny nearly chokes on her sandwich. She wants a bitchy borrowed butler, so they can talk about the gaucheness of things.

Next time, Sonja talks about LuAnn and Dorinda, Tinsley feels weird, and Ramona confronts Bethenny.

👠 I totally forgot to watch Feud: Bette and Joan on Sunday, so caught up with it On Demand today. This miniseries hasn’t ceased to impress me, and I wish it would never end. This week, the stars are about to film Hush…Hush, Sweet Charlotte, originally titled Whatever Happened to Cousin Charlotte? because the studio wanted to keep milking Baby Jane. The episode was entitled Hagsploitation, which was apparently a thing in the early 1960s. Charlotte was also one of my favorite movies growing up; I was forever trying to catch it on TV. I remember my parents going to see it in the theater, and I was annoyed because they thought I was too young to go. Even at a tender age, I liked weird, scary stuff. Even better, John Waters guest starred as William Castle, who directed Joan Crawford in Straight Jacket, the two of them making the rounds of movie theaters to promote the film. Eventually, Joan was replaced in Charlotte by Olivia de Havilland, but we’re not at that point yet.

Hush

Apr12

April 11, 2017 – Sonny Sees Jax, No One Gets the Baby, Beverly Hills Reunites & Imposters Bids Adieu

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What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

General Hospital

Lulu brings Rocco to visit Dante at the station. She’s all ready for her visit with Charlotte. Dante asks what she’s afraid of.

Hayden is having coffee outside of Perks, while Curtis runs the steps. She’s adding an extra kick to her coffee, and offers him a bottle in a paper bag. He accepts, saying he has to stay hydrated. She’s hiding from Finn because she wants to get back together and is scared he’ll say yes.

Finn isn’t doing too well. He’s like forget it, and we see he’s given himself a shot. But it’s a dream.

The hooded figure goes through Alexis’s house. He looks at a photo album. Alexis arrives home.

Carly tells Sonny not now. He asks if she heard him right, and repeats that he wasn’t unfaithful after all. I’m going to say this again. That wasn’t what she was angry about in the first place. Why would this change anything? Another case of the man not listening and/or hearing what he wants to hear.

Alexis goes into the house and sees a light is on. She asks if anyone is there. Kristina walks in, and Alexis almost crowns her with a laptop.

Hayden tells Curtis that she left Finn with a list of rehabs. Curtis says he knows Finn hurt her. He wanted to kill him, but Finn is legit; he’s a good guy, but the detox was rough. Hayden says he called her out on all of her insecurities. Curtis says he was out of his mind. Hayden says if it wasn’t true, it wouldn’t have been in his head, and he doesn’t trust her. Curtis says Finn loves her, but he needs to go to rehab and it’s a long road. She can’t fix it or save him. If she tries, she’ll end up losing herself.

Hayden’s phone rings. It’s Finn. She asks if he’s okay, and he says not really. He wants her to come over. She asks if he’s called a rehab, and he says he needs to see her.

Sonny explains about the recording to Carly. He says a girl who’s cold-hearted enough to set him up, would have recorded the act, but she only recorded the aftermath. He says that Nelle drugged him, and that’s why he blacked out. He says it should have been a clue, since in all his years of drinking, it’s never happened before. Carly asks if he has proof, and he tells her Nelle confessed. He says they can be together now, because he didn’t listen to what the problem really is.

Lulu tells Dante she can’t wait to get to know Charlotte, and that she’s bought Charlotte a bunch of toys. Dante says she seems nervous. Rocco gives Dante some cookies. He tells Rocco they’re the best cookies ever, even though that’s doubtful from the look on his face. When Rocco runs off, Lulu tells Dante about Rocco adding extra salt. Dante tells Lulu that gifts or cookies won’t make Charlotte love her.

Finn tells Hayden he does trust her; that’s why he asked her to help with the detox. She says he didn’t have anyone else. He says he’s ashamed of how he treated her. She tells him that he needs help that she can’t give him, and to please find it. She hangs up. She puts more liquor in her coffee, and Curtis says she did good. She asks why she feels like crap then.

Finn tells Roxie that he blew it. Hayden wants him to go to one of those places. He doesn’t think he can handle 28 days without practicing medicine, Roxie, and Hayden, but if he doesn’t go, he’ll lose Hayden forever.

Kristina doesn’t think a laptop is a very good weapon, and Alexis says she’ll use a fireplace poker next time. Kristina points out that it’s weird, and Alexis is still jumpy. Alexis says it seemed like someone was in the house, and tells her about the light. Kristina says maybe she forgot that she left it on. Alexis tells Kristina about Nathan’s visit, and Kristina says he talked to her too.

Carly wonders why Nelle would confess now. Maybe she’s lying because she likes Michael. Sonny says as soon as she said she drugged him, he knew it was true. No matter how drunk he was, she’s not his type. I guess he’s never heard of beer goggles. Everything after that, is on him. He tells Carly how much he loves her, and asks if this can be over. Carly looks at the wine on the table with the two glasses, and says it can’t.

Alexis says Nathan had no right to question Kristina. Kristina says they just ran into each other, but he was more worried about Alexis than anything else. He thinks she might be withholding information and putting herself in danger. Alexis says she’ll call Jordan, and tell her to make Nathan back off. Kristina asks what she could be hiding at this point.

Finn calls Tracy because he needs a good dose of the truth. He gets voicemail, and apologizes for what he said, calling her the best friend he’s ever had. He tells her that he misses her. He decides to go out for some fresh air.

Hayden thinks that Curtis talking to Finn is a good idea. He needs a friend, and she can’t be one. Curtis has been where Finn is, and can possibly get through to him. Curtis says he can’t convince Finn to go to rehab any more than she can. She gets up, obviously drunk. She tells Curtis they should go shake their booties and dance the night away. He says she’s crazy, but in a good way. She kisses him.

Sonny asks Carly if this is about his ultimatum, and says that he didn’t know where to go. If he’d just said something that morning, they could have worked things out. He knows he’s not easy to live with, and that Nelle shook her faith in him. He says nobody knows him in his core – the ugliness, anger, and brokenness – except her, and she loves him anyway. He needs her to love him, and he loves her. He says they can do this, and asks her to come back. Tears roll down her cheeks, and she says that she’s sorry, but he has to listen. With perfect soap timing, Jax pops out while putting on his shirt.

Dante says Lulu should just be herself. Lulu said she tried that, and Charlotte hates her. She was thinking about her needs instead of Charlotte’s. Dante says the more time Charlotte spends with her, the more she’ll get to know and like her. He tells Lulu to just be present and listen, instead of using bribery. Rocco joins them, and asks if Lulu will love Charlotte more than him.

Sonny tells Carly that didn’t take long. Jax says it’s her business. Sonny asks if it bothers him that he’s a back-up or a side piece. Carly tells him not to be ugly. Sonny says she crucified him for months, for a mistake he didn’t make, and the first chance she gets, she spreads her legs. Oooh! Jax tells him to apologize and leave, and Carly says let him go on. Sonny says Carly can’t last five minutes without a man in her bed, and that makes her a bad wife, but a great whore. Carly smacks him.

Alexis tells Kristina that she’s not hiding anything, but Kristina doesn’t believe her. Alexis says it’s going to sound “out there,” and Kristina says she can handle it. Alexis tells her that she feels like Julian isn’t dead, and it’s something tangible. She hears someone knocking, and there’s no one there; the phone rings, and ditto from a number she doesn’t recognize. She says she knows how Kristina felt about him, but Kristina says she can’t tell Alexis how to feel. She accepts Alexis’s grief, but that doesn’t explain phantom phone calls or knocks on the door. Alexis tells her about the credit card and phone call from the gas station.

Curtis tells Hayden to take it easy. She says there’s an attraction between them, and she’s free now. He says she’s wasted. He likes her a lot; she’s beautiful, smart, and edgy, although she’s sometimes a pita, but they’re friends. He doesn’t want to waste that or take advantage of it. She tells him to make her forget, and kisses him again. Mimicking Jax’s timing, Finn walks out and sees them.

Finn says he thought he’d get some fresh air, and asks what they’re up to. Curtis says it’s not what it looked like. He says Hayden cares about Finn, but he has no one to blame but himself. She’s drunk and reckless because of him. If he doesn’t want to get help, Finn will crash and burn, and take her along with him. He says he’s been there, but Finn is worse off, considering how long he’s been using. He says it hurts to admit you need help when something has control over you. The addiction is controlling him, and he’d better take help or he’ll lose Hayden. Finn says he loves her, and walks away. Hayden starts crying, and Curtis holds her.

Carly tells Sonny that she’s sorry he’s hurt and found out the truth too late, but he doesn’t get to come in her house and name call. He says she wanted the truth, and she lists all the recent lies he’s told her. She says for someone who prides himself on his word, he’s the biggest liar of all. She says it’s never going to be different and he says that’s right, because they’re done. He slams out. Jax asks Carly if she’s okay. She says no, but she will be.

Alexis tells Kristina that she has unresolved feelings for Julian. She wants to believe that what he said in the letter is true, and she never got a chance to talk to him about it. Kristina says she had a huge loss and serious trauma; it’s going to take time to recover. Alexis thanks her for talking her down. Kristina suggests she stick around, and maybe spend the night. She finds the photo album on the floor. Alexis says she’s sure she’d put it away, and Kristina says it was open as though someone was just looking at it.

Dante tells Rocco that they love him more than ever, and Lulu says he’s everything. They’re just excited about him getting a sister. Dante says no parent likes any one kid better than another – it’s the law. Lulu says they love them both. Rocco asks if that means Charlotte’s dad loves her too. Dante says he does, but a judge needs to sort things out. He asks if Charlotte is going to live with them, and Lulu says for now, they’ll just visit with her. Group hug.

Curtis gives Hayden some water. She apologizes. Curtis says his ego can always use a boost. She asks what’s wrong with her, and he says only small stuff. She’ll bounce back with or without Finn; she’s too stubborn not to. She wonders if what Curtis said made a difference, and if Finn is further on road to recovery or worse off.

Finn meets with a cliché-looking drug dealer. Actually, he’s a cliché-looking drug dealer who also looks like he stepped out of the 1960s.

Carly looks for some legal contact information. She tells Jax that Sonny is going to lash out, and she’s not going to let him trample over her. She has nothing to feel guilty about. Jax asks if she is feeling guilty, but she says no. They shared something special about them. She says she should feel guilty because she gave up too soon – at least Sonny thinks she did. She says she fought for as hard and as long as she could, but she’s done.

Alexis says she was showing Diane some old photos. Kristina goes down Memory Lane, and Alexis says it was nice while it lasted. She says she’s tired, and Kristina asks if she wants her to stay over, but Alexis says she’s fine and don’t worry. She isn’t going to put herself in any danger, just to bed. Kristina leaves.

Alexis looks at the photo album. She discovers that pictures are missing.

Tomorrow, Nina asks Valentin if he’s hiding something, Brad gets good news, and a dead body is found.

If Loving You is Wrong

Alex tells the judge to check the birth certificate. He asks who Brad is. Randal insists he’s the father, and the judge asks if he’s taken a paternity test. He’s annoyed that Randal is wasting his time. He says it’s obvious neither one of them is a fit parent. He’s going to order that the baby be placed in foster care. Until paternity is established, neither one of them is going to see the baby. He kicks everyone out of his office.

Randal follows Alex and blocks her way. He tells her she can’t stop him from getting his son, and she says she just did. She hates the day she met him, and he says that makes two of them. He does that creepy smile, and says he has the upper hand. He’s going to the police to tell them that she set him up. He says her mother told him, so that’s proof. Alex says big deal; she’s dead. He continues being all weird, and talks about her parents getting killed. He says her parents were evil people, and he sees it in her. She smacks him and he laughs. Omg, I hate this guy. He asks when the funeral is being held, and if there’s a hillbilly fund in a mason jar for it. He tells her that she has nothing anymore, not even her baby boy. She asks him to hold her purse. Oh, okay, she starts yelling that he tried to rob her. He throws the purse back, and a taxi comes out of nowhere and picks her up.

Someone named Diane knocks on Kelly’s door. It’s her ex’s mother. She looks around, and says it’s a nice house. She asks if her son’s money bought it, but Kelly doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Diane asks why he’s in jail for fraud then. Kelly asks why Diane is there, and Diane says for her son; he needs a place to stay. She says Kelly owes him. Kelly doesn’t think it’s a good idea for him to stay there because of Justice. Diane finds his name ironic when his father didn’t get any in taking the fall for her. Kelly apologizes, and Diane says she’s not that sorry, since she’s free. She insists on Kelly helping him get back on his feet. Kelly says that’s not going to happen. Diane tells her not to make her show how far she’ll go when she’s been wronged. Kelly says she’s just looking out for her son, and Diane says watch her look out for hers.

Lushion talks to Lamont about Andrew. There’s been no trace of him. Pete calls. He’s getting sprung from the hospital soon, and going into protective custody. Pete isn’t thrilled, but Lushion says it’s for his own good. Pete says Eddie isn’t God and couldn’t even find him under an alias. He tells Lushion that he’ll keep in touch. Someone has to know where he is, and he trusts Lushion.

Randal stomps into the station. Lushion asks why he’s there, and he says to make a complaint. He’s supposed to talk to Rick, and asks if Rick is a good guy. Lushion says he is, and asks why Randal dropped the lawsuit against Eddie. Randal says he moved on to something better. Lushion says Eddie told him that he saved Randal’s life, but Randal says if the other guy hadn’t shown up, he’d be dead. Lushion asks if he saw another officer there, and shows him Andrew’s picture. Randal says he was a little busy, so no. Lushion asks if there was a shootout before they arrived, and Randal tells him that only Alex had a gun, and was holding it to his head. He claims she set everything up. He explains that the FBI told him to talk to Rick. Lushion asks if he’s sure he wants to go through with this. Randal says that’s Lushion’s problem; he wants to let Alex and Eddie go. Lushion tells Randal to leave Alex alone, but Randal insists that he did nothing and she tried to have him killed. He does the creepy smile thing, and says he’s letting nothing go. Lushion says it’s just going to get worse, and Randal says that’s his plan. Rick comes by, and Lushion introduces them.

Randal sits at Rick’s desk. Lushion tells Rick to take what he says with a grain of salt. He asks how bad the house is, and Rick says he needs a crew. Lushion asks if there are any leads, and Rick tells him they got DNA and hair from the house. Lushion wonders if they’re looking at someone, but Rick can’t say.

Eddie comes in the breakroom to bug Esperanza. He tells her internal affairs is driving him crazy. That’s a short putt. BA-DUM-CHH! She wishes she could burn some sense into his ass. She asks why he was in the office, and Eddie tells her to ask Alex. He says they’re trying to figure out what happened. He says Alex called her parents and had them kidnap Randal, and the DA is trying to find out about her. They see a news item about Andrew going missing. Esperanza says that should be of interest to him.

Lushion gets a crew out to clean the house. It says cleaning service on the van, but that’s not how it works. There’s a van that actually says “crime scene” on it that cleans up crime scenes. Not a regular cleaning service. I know this because, unfortunately, I lived next door to someone who committed suicide.

Lushion sees Brad parked in the driveway of Alex’s house. Brad says her car isn’t there, and Lushion says she totaled it. Brad asks if she’s okay, and Lushion tells him to ask her. He asks if Brad is all right. Brad says he’s fine, and asks what Lushion is doing there. Lushion explains they’re moving in, and gives Brad props for rescuing the baby. Brad says he did what he had to. Lushion calls him humble, and repeats that he should talk to Alex. He says the one thing he can’t do is protect his heart from her. Lushion says he has a lot of heart left, and he can fix it. Brad says he doesn’t want to, and Lushion asks why he’s there then. Brad doesn’t know, and Lushion says he has nothing to lose. A delivery truck comes. and Lushion has to run. Lushion tells the driver he has to come back. He needs a few more hours.

Natalie sits by Joey’s bedside at the hospital. Kelly comes in with flowers. Kelly asks how he’s feeling and he says like he got shot. She tells him that she brought flowers, and he says he’s not dead. Natalie tells her not to pay him any mind. She can tell something is up with Kelly, and Joey tells them to take it outside.

In the hallway, Natalie asks what’s going on. Kelly tells her about Ramsey. Natalie is shocked and sorry. Kelly says they’re looking for suspects. She says she hardly knew him, but Natalie says that doesn’t make it any less sad. She knows there’s something else, and tells Kelly to spill it. Kelly asks if a man has ever been abusive to Natalie, and tells her about Travis. She says he’s like a different person, and she doesn’t know what to do. Natalie suggests shooting him in his ass. Just pull the trigger one good time; she doesn’t even have to mess up her hair. She tells Kelly to get a gun. Kelly says she has a meeting to get a restraining order. Natalie says that’s good, but a gun will restrain him too. She’ll call her girl Michelle, and she’ll help Kelly. Kelly wants to focus on the restraining order. Natalie says she told her.

Alex looks at a family photo and cries. She’s cleaning the house, because when in doubt, scrub something. Esperanza knocks on the door. She says she called, but Alex says sorry, she needed time alone. Esperanza says she heard what happened and she’s sorry. She asks if Alex needs help with the funeral, but Alex says let the county deal with it. Esperanza thinks she’s being harsh, but Alex says they don’t deserve any dignity. She wants Esperanza to drop it.

Alex asks why she’s there, and Esperanza says she was checking on her. Alex says she’s fine and not to tell her she isn’t. Esperanza asks how the baby is, and Alex says the doctor says he’s fine. She tells Esperanza he’s been put into foster care, even though she had nothing to do with it. Esperanza thinks she called her parents to help her to get rid of Randal. Alex asks if she’s there to aggravate her, and Esperanza says she’s there to help. She knows that Alex went to see them. She shows Alex some phone records and pictures. Alex asks if she’s an investigator. Esperanza says she’s trying to get ahead of Alex being charged as an accessory to murder.

Esperanza says she can get in a lot of trouble. She tells Alex to drop the attitude, and asks if she never wants to see her kids again. She says that Alex has to come up with an air-tight excuse before someone comes around. She says protests have already started, and things can get ugly fast. Her father was part of an anti-government militia. She needs to come up with a good story; she can’t negate seeing her parents. She should say that she was trying to prevent Randal from harm, and not deviate from the story, no matter what. She tells Alex she was never there. Alex thanks her ,and they hug. (I guess Esperanza doesn’t realize Lushion is two houses away?)

Alex wipes her tears away.

Kelly can’t get in to see the attorney because he had an emergency. She asks if there’s someone else they can recommend; she can only come on her lunch break and needs to file the restraining order. She says it’s urgent, and the secretary says she’ll phone in the morning. Totally unrealistic, since I’m sure they would steer her to someone else. She has to get to Justice’s game, and asks for security to walk her to her car. She calls Justice, but he says the other team had to forfeit, so the game was canceled. He tells her that Travis is giving him a ride home. Kelly stares in silence at the phone.

Next time, Diane comes to Kelly’s office, Louise suggests that Alex could have cheated on Randal, and Lushion talks to Alex.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – The Reunion, Part One

Kyle gives Dorit the skinny on reunions. Along with her gorgeous German Shepherd. Dorit realizes she’ll have to put her big girl panties on. To change it up a little, we get pre-reunion observations from the women in their home settings. We also get mini flash forwards. Next is the getting ready. LisaV tells Andy not to be mean.

And so we begin. Hmm…I’m not crazy about Eileen’s outfit. The outfits as a whole aren’t that dazzling, except for LisaV, Dorit and Erika. LisaR and Erika are wearing the same shoes, and Lisa informs us that she’s not wearing underwear. Andy talks about people on social media calling Dorit “Doritos,” and she says with a name like hers, she’s used to it. Everyone talks about how their names have been made fun of. Andy asks Erika about being chosen for Dancing with the Stars, which at this point, hadn’t started filming yet. LisaR says it’s about pacing yourself, and thinks Erika can go all the way. She has the same dance partner that LisaV did, and they joke about that.

We jump right in, with Andy talking about how Dorit called Erika “cold.” We flash back to various interactions between the two of them. I just know it’s coming – Pantygate. We end up with the Hong Kong dinner where Erika lost it. The T-shirt dress is discussed. Oh, for God’s sake. A fan thinks Dorit wanted to pick a fight with Erika from day one, but Dorit says they got off on the wrong foot, and it wasn’t her intention. The first Pantygate mention is dropped, and Dorit says it was meant to be playful. Erika says there’s a bit of truth in all kidding, and that’s how you get away with sh*t. I tend to agree, but the reactions to that went way overboard and for way too long.

Dorit says you can’t live a life walking on eggshells. Andy asks LisaV if Erika is being fair in saying Dorit talks sh*t, and Lisa says in all fairness, Dorit does talk a lot. Andy asks Eileen about Erika’s reaction to her saying that it’s not like Dorit killed her child, and Eileen says she didn’t feel personally attacked. She realized something else was going on. Erika says she didn’t want to break down like that, but it is something she thinks about occasionally, with her son being a police officer. We find out that Erika leant Eileen her glam squad as a peace offering. LisaR says meltdowns happen, and Kyle says it was like someone took over Erika’s body. They agree they all felt bad for Eileen.

Andy asks Erika about being the mom of a police officer. She says you know anything is possible. She doesn’t want to make a big deal about it, but she does get scared. He lives with her, and only when he pulls up after work, can she relax. She says he gets ribbed at work about the show. They talk about her sensitivity, and how she reveals herself slowly. Kyle says being sensitive can make you extra guarded. They discuss Erika’s trip home, and when her mother apologized for being hard on her as a child. We see a part of their conversation we hadn’t seen before. LisaV asks if Erika went the opposite in raising her son. Lisa says her parents weren’t demonstrative, so she lavished affection on her children. Erika says that her mother was loving, but made her grow up quickly. She talks about still giving her son hugs and kisses, and how much he hates it.

Andy says that LisaV, LisaR, and Eileen tried to co-exist, but it didn’t always turn out well. What a stupid choice of words. We flash back to some of their interactions. Part of the problem with these reunions is that they bring back old stuff people have gotten past, they relive the moment, and get pissed off all over again. Eileen says she was right about LisaV not being so nice. They talk about the Yulan documentary. Eileen says she wanted to bridge the gap by going with Lisa to watch it, and Lisa says there was a connection. Andy asks if it brings LisaV joy to see LisaR in the hot seat, and she says Andy likes it more. Nice return. Kyle thinks she does a little. LisaV says she likes a lot about LisaR, although sometimes she wants to strangle her. LisaR says that she’d thought they were cool when she was invited on the Hong Kong trip, and LisaV says a lot of things came up in Hong Kong. We flash back to LisaR being an idiot at the dinner. LisaR says they had a powerful moment, and they start talking about a mutual friend who passed away. Andy says he feels like they’re on the path to good things. He’s a regular Papa Hemingway tonight.

We move on to Dorit’s accent, and flash back to some Dorit moments. Andy asks why Boy George lives with them. She says she has a big house and extra room, and he lands there between gigs. (At one time, PK was his manager.) They talk about the flack she’s gotten for her parenting, and how many domestic helpers she has. Kyle says she never had s nanny, but it depends on the parent’s working life, so she’d never judge anyone. Dorit speaks Hebrew, Italian, Spanish and English fluently, and somehow, we go back to the accent thing. LisaR has to be shown the video to be reminded she called Dorit’s accent fake. Andy tries to stir the pot, but it doesn’t happen.

PK is going to join them. Andy asks how Dorit feels. She hopes the women don’t attack him, and that he gets to have his say. Andy asks how Erika feels, and she says it’s not her show. Alrighty then.

We get a glimpse of the Beverly Hills lifestyle, and flash back to various shopping trips, vacations, parties, and purchases. Andy asks if any of them will wear tonight’s outfits again, but most of them say no. Kyle has a section of her closet devoted to scary moments on the show. Andy suggests a clothing museum. We revisit Dorit’s $230,000 Bentley. They talk expensive cars for a while. We find out that Erika’s glam squad flies business class. Well, unless they’re on the private jet.

We see a little of PK behind the scenes. Dorit tells him to just be himself. Andy asks how he feels, and he says a bit nervous. We find out his name is Paul. Andy asks how he got so rich, and he says he started richer in real estate. Andy asks if his nosiness is natural or is he getting involved where he doesn’t belong, and he says maybe 50/50. And here it comes…

We flash back to the source of Pantygate, and see clips from its formation. Andy stupidly asks why it makes Erika uncomfortable, and she says the whole thing is embarrassing. Dorit has to insist once again that she didn’t think Erika did it on purpose, because for some reason, Erika is deaf to those words. Dorit says it was like saying don’t talk about a pink elephant in the room, and Andy – once again the soul of eloquence – asks if she’s comparing Erika’s who-ha to a pink elephant. Kyle says Erika was asked if she was wearing underwear, and didn’t volunteer the information. Well, really she did. Kinda. Erika says it’s gone on too long. PK says it wasn’t like he sat there and stared. LisaV says she didn’t think it would be such a big deal, since Erika wears a c-word necklace. Erika says that’s different than being told that you’re doing something like that on purpose. Because again she can’t hear that no one ever said that. If they had, we’d have seen the video ten times already. PK tells Erika not to call his wife a nasty person, and she says she’s not. She’s calling PK a nasty person for what he said.

Next time, round part two, LisaR again asks if people were doing coke at Dorit’s dinner party, Kim joins the group and tells Eden not to take her inventory, Erika tells Dorit to get the f out of here, and LisaR walks out.

🎭 Tonight, was the Imposters finale. If you haven’t been watching, I highly suggest you marathon this on On Demand. It’s fun and flirty, with a plot of twists and turns. In the final episode of the season, we got a glimpse of Maddie’s past and saw her first con. At the end, almost every character got conned as well, and Uma Thurman made a brief appearance. While there was promise of more intrigue to come, to date, Imposters hasn’t been renewed or canceled. I’m hoping for a second season. This show is like a breath of fresh air.

🚤 Below Deck Mediterranean starts Tuesday, May 2nd at 9 pm, and will have female captain this season. Although I’m looking forward to the new shows, I’ll miss Captain Lee.