What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Michael gives Willow a picture of the Eiffel Tower, and says, he and Wiley colored it in, but he’s the one who couldn’t stay in the lines. She loves it, and he says, there’s more. He knows she’s going to be busy wrapping up nursing school in the next few months. She says, here’s hoping she passes, but he says, he has no doubt. He thought they’d take a little trip over the long holiday weekend, and she asks, where to? He points to the picture, and she says, Paris. He asks if it’s something she wants to do, and she says, of course (🍷). She’s never been to Paris. She’s never been anywhere, but especially not Paris. He tells her to start pricing berets, and she hugs him. Coming up the walk, Carly sees them through the window, and smiles.

Sonny shakes a pill into his hand by the water fountain, and Leo asks if he’s sure he wants to do that. Sonny says, is he sure he wants to take his medication? but Leo asks if he’s sure he wants to drink from a public water fountain. Sonny asks, why not? and Ned calls to Leo, saying, Leo can’t walk ahead of him like that. Either this is a new Leo, or this kid grew over the weekend. Sonny says, Leo was just explaining to him that it’s dangerous to drink out of a water fountain. He needs to know why. Leo says, water fountains are sanitized less often than toilets, and Sonny laughs, saying, okay. Now I don’t want to drink out of a public water fountain.

Cameron tends the fire at the cabin, and tells Josslyn that he’s starving. He says he’s going to whip something up in the kitchen, and asks if she thinks Trina is hungry. Josslyn says she isn’t sure; she won’t answer. Cameron wonders if they should check on her, but Josslyn says she can hear Trina moving in the room. She probably just needs space. He tells her not worry about Trina or what she said, but Josslyn isn’t sure she can. What if they’ve been ignoring her feelings this whole time? Cameron says, the only thing stronger than Trina, is Josslyn’s friendship with her, and they kiss.

Esme asks Spencer if they should stop for coffee, but he says, it’s been a long day; he’s tired. She says, it’s still too early to go to his grandmother’s house, and he asks if she’d rather wake his grandmother and Doc up in the middle of the night. She says, she’d rather not answer any questions about why they came home from their weekend getaway the same day they left, and he says he’s sure. She asks, what’s that supposed to mean? and he says, it means he has a question. What the hell was she up to back there?

Elizabeth looks at some of Franco’s art in the art therapy room, and Finn comes to the door. He asks if he’s interrupting, but she says, of course (🍷) not; come in. He looks at a painting with her, and says, Franco may have been a man with a complicated history, but he sure had a lot of talent. She says, he sure did. She needs to make sure anything he has left is protected. He says, protected? and she says, someone torched Franco’s art studio. Someone is determined to destroy his legacy.

At Charlie’s, Stella tells Curtis that he has a decision to make. Does he want answers to things he might really not want to know, or does he want his father back in his life? Marshall comes in, and says, small world. Do they mind if he joins them? They don’t say anything, and he says, it seems like they’re into something, so he’ll just go deal with his business. Curtis asks, what business is that? and Marshall says, the manager Phyllis called him. He left his credit card there. He’ll just get it and be off. Curtis says, not so fast. (BTW, to confuse us, we’re back to the other Marshall again.) Curtis says he wasn’t interrupting. They were just talking about him. Marshall hopes they at least found a few good things to say, and Curtis asks if he has a minute. Stella says she’ll get the card from the bar, and asks if they want anything. Curtis says he’s good, but Marshall says, he’s developed quite a weakness for the wings here; he’d like one or two. She says she thinks they only come by the dozen, but if they’re all that, she’ll have some too. He says, tell Phyllis it’s on him, and he and Curtis sit down. Marshall asks, what’s on Curtis’s mind? and Curtis says, a lot, but they can start with why Marshall walked out of The Savoy when Curtis said he was considering asking Sonny for help.

Ned tells Sonny, Leo’s been playing a video game where he builds cities, so he’s gotten very interested in public works. He’s even advising Olivia on infrastructure improvements at the MetroCourt. Sonny says he’s sure she appreciates that, and Leo tells him, she said she’d put it in the budget. He asks if he can come over soon to play with Avery, and Ned says, Avery is more than welcome to come to their house too. Sonny tells Leo to come over any time he wants. He and Carly would love to have him over.

Willow lets Carly in, and Carly says, they look happy. Willow says her son is the most romantic, thoughtful man alive, and Carly says, that must have been some box of chocolates. Willow says, he’s whisking her away to Paris, and shows her the picture. Carly says, that’s some kind of getaway, and Willow says, she can’t wait. Oh my God. The trip is only a few weeks away, and she doesn’t have a passport. Michael says, they can get it expedited. She just needs her birth certificate, driver’s license, and a passport photo. Willow says, he thought of everything. If Carly will excuse her, she has a birth certificate to find. She runs off, and Carly says, she’s glad they’re getting away; they deserve it. He says he agrees, and asks if she’s okay. She says she ran into Nina, and he asks how that went. Carly says she hates her, and the part that kills her is that his father refuses to acknowledge the amount of pain she’s caused. How can Sonny say he loves her when he still has room in his heart for someone who caused so much pain to her?

Esme says, what is she up to? and Spencer says, it’s a fair question. She says, it’s not enough he accused her of orchestrating this weekend to blow up his friendships? and he says, which she denied. She says, does he believe her? and he says, he wants to, which is why he’s asking what she hoped to achieve with the questions she was asking during the drinking game. She asks, how was she supposed to know it would hit a nerve? She’s not the one who moved in on her best friend’s crush. He says, no, but she’s the one who threw it in Joss’s face, even though that’s not what happened. She says, wasn’t it? Trina seemed to think so before she threw her little tantrum. Spencer says, Trina didn’t throw a tantrum, and she asks what he would call it when someone storms off like that. He says, Trina was not herself, and Esme flashes back to putting the drugs in Trina’s hot toddy. She says, so it’s her fault Trina is a lightweight. Anything else he and his friends want to blame her for? Rising sea levels, world hunger, a hangnail?

Trina comes out of the bedroom, and Josslyn runs to her, asking if she’s okay. They hug, and Trina says, yeah. Josslyn says, they were so worried, and Trina says, she went out like a light. Even now, she’s super groggy. Cameron says, alcohol has a way of sneaking up on you, and Trina asks if people usually black out after one drink. Cameron says, maybe… if the drink is strong? but Trina says, it didn’t happen to anyone else. Maybe they’re just more experienced drinkers than she is. Cameron says, they’re not that experienced, and Josslyn says, they didn’t go to a boarding school in a country where you pour chardonnay on breakfast cereal. Cameron asks if Trina would like water or coffee to help with the hangover, and she says she’ll take some water. Trina tells Josslyn that she’s sorry she worried them, and for whatever happened. Josslyn says, she doesn’t remember? and Trina says, not much. Cameron brings the water, and says he’s going to take a shower. Trina asks Josslyn what she missed.

Phyllis asks what she can get Stella, and Stella points out Marshall and says, he left his credit card. Phyllis says, he sure did, and asks if she knows Stella; she looks familiar. Stella laughs, and says, she has one of those faces. They introduce themselves, and Phyllis says, so Stella knows Curtis. Stella says, he happens to be her nephew, and Phyllis says, then she must always have a VIP seat at the hottest club in town. Stella says, she’s got that right, and asks how Phyllis knows Curtis. Phyllis says, she and Curtis have a mutual friend in common, and once in a while, she likes to see who’s playing at The Savoy. Stella’s nephew has great taste in music. Stella says, it’s in his blood, and looks at Marshall.

Marshall asks Curtis not to tell him that he reached out to Sonny, especially not on his behalf, and Curtis says, what Marshall saw the other night isn’t typical Sonny. Marshall says, he doesn’t have a problem with Sonny in particular, but that lifestyle in general. As Curtis knows, he’s experienced getting mixed up with unsavory characters. He doesn’t want that for Curtis. Curtis says he understands, even if he doesn’t know all the details. He guesses they’ll get to those later. Marshall says he appreciates that, and Curtis suggests they put their past in the rearview for now, but wants to get one thing straight. If Marshall wants to have any kind of relationship with him, never threaten to disappear again.

Finn says, so Franco’s art studio burned. Does Elizabeth know what happened? She says, just that it was arson. They’ll keep investigating. Thankfully, no one was hurt, and barely no other property was damaged. He tells her that she looks exhausted, and she says, what every woman wants to hear. He says she’s beautiful when she’s tired; is that better? She says he’s right. She hasn’t been sleeping. He asks if there’s something else on her mind. She can talk to him. She says she can’t. It would ruin everything.

Spencer says he’s exhausted, and suggests he and Esme discuss this in the morning. She says, go to bed angry? No way. If anybody should be angry, it’s her with him. He asks what he did, and she says, how about the fact that he didn’t defend her, not once, not even when Josslyn called her a manipulative little bitch to her face? He says, after she drove Josslyn’s best friend out of the room in tears. Joss has a temper. He’d say she got off easy. She tells him, so he’s saying she’s a manipulative bitch, but he says he’s not. She says, he sure seems to be thinking it. She doesn’t want to sleep on this. She doesn’t want to go home with him at all.

Josslyn tells Trina, let’s just say, it was an eventful night, and Trina says, and she slept right through it. Where’s Spencer and Esme? Josslyn says, they left, and Trina asks, why? Josslyn says, she called Esme a manipulative little bitch, and Trina says, to her face? Josslyn says, which one, and Trina says, damn, Joss; well played. Josslyn says, honestly? It felt like too little too late. What’s the last thing Trina remembers? Trina says, they were playing Never Have I Ever, drinking hot toddies… Josslyn says, Esme asked Trina about when she and Cam were thinking about dating. Trina asks what she said, and Josslyn says, Trina told them that she missed the way things were before she and Cam got together, and felt like she had to pretend to be happy for them.

Carly tells Michael, it wasn’t anything specific that Nina said that upset her. It was the way she said it, like she and Sonny had this intimacy between them. Michael says, the last time he and Sonny spoke, he swore that he and Nina were done completely. She says, Sonny told her that many times, but emotionally, what they had between them is still alive and well. He says, as angry as he is at his dad for his part in this, he just wants his parents to be happy. She says, her too, but after everything that’s happened, happiness just seems further and further away.

Ned hands Sonny a bottle of water, saying, it’s the least he can do. Sonny takes his pill, and Ned suggests Leo sit and look at his book while he talks to Leo’s Uncle Sonny. Sonny tells Ned that Leo’s a smart kid, and Ned says, now that he and Olivia have learned how to tap into what interests Leo, he’s really blossomed. In fact, they’re here for a system technology program that GH offers to kids with ASD, Autism Spectrum Disorder. Leo loves it, and he’s learning a hell of a lot too. It’s become their special father/son time. Sonny says, seems like Ned and Olivia are trying to get it right, and Ned says, it’s a work in progress; it’s marriage. Sonny asks what Ned means, and Ned says he hopes he’s not overstepping, but Olivia filled him in on Sonny’s troubles. Based on what Sonny said to Leo earlier, are he and Carly back on track? Sonny says, they’re good, especially after what he’s got planned.

Michael tells Carly, he made it clear to Sonny that Nina should have paid for what she did, and Sonny shouldn’t have gotten in the way of that. Carly says, and Sonny told Michael that he just wanted to put the past behind him, or he just wanted to keep the peace. Just more vague excuses that translate to letting Nina off the hook. Michael says, pretty much, and she says, that’s why she can’t live with him right now. He says, he and Dante did convince Sonny that he needs to give Carly what she needs right now, which is time and space. She asks what Sonny said, and Michael says, he told them that he was willing to wait for her to work through this. She says, we’ll see. Patience isn’t a strong suit of Sonny’s, and Michael asks what he can do, but she says, nothing. She shouldn’t even be here dumping this on him. He says, of course (🍷) she should, but she says, she shouldn’t; he’s her son; their son. He says, that’s why he’s one of the people she should be confiding in, and he’s glad she is. He was talking to Drew, and Drew told him all he can really do is be there for his parents, and that’s what he’s doing. He’s glad he had the opportunity. She says, she just wishes Sonny would listen.

Sonny tells Ned, he’s planning something so romantic, it’s going to knock Carly’s socks off. She knows he loves her, but she needs to see it on a grand scale. Ned asks if Sonny is sure this is the right move, and Sonny says, Ned should understand. He did the same thing with Olivia, right? Ned says, he messed things up pretty bad, and lost Olivia’s trust. He scrambled to win her back. Sonny asks what he did, and Ned says, his first instinct was also to give her this grand gesture, and Sonny says, see? He’s on the right track. Ned says, but his daughter and Sonny’s son convinced him it wasn’t the right move. Like Sonny, he was convinced a great gesture would win Olivia back, but it would have been a disaster. So take it from him, whatever Sonny is planning, he should reconsider.

Phyllis tells Stella that her order is in, and Stella thanks her for accommodating a special request. Phyllis says, no problem with a half order. So Mr. Ashford is Curtis’s father. Stella says, he’s her late sister’s husband, and Phyllis says, it’s so nice to get family together. Stella says, sometimes. Family’s not always easy.

Marshall tells Curtis that he shouldn’t have put conditions on his presence. He wants nothing more than to build a relationship between them and their family. Curtis says Marshall can’t do that if he leaves again, but Marshall promises he’s not going anywhere. Curtis asks how Marshall’s new meds are working, and Marshall says, so far, so good. He lucked out with having three medical professionals around when he had his episode. He’s sorry if he scared Curtis. Curtis asks if Marshall is still looking to buy a house here, and Marshall says, he’s hoping to put down roots. That is, if Curtis doesn’t object. Curtis says, it’s totally up to Marshall. The way he hears it, it seems Marshall’s already made friends. Like Epiphany Johnson? Marshall laughs, and tells Curtis, all he can say is, the longer he stays, the more reasons he has to stick around.

Spencer asks if Esme is breaking up with him, and she says she doesn’t know; should she? His friends have had it in for her from the day she showed up. She put up with it for his sake, but he hasn’t stood up to them for her, not once. He says, that’s not true. He made it clear how important she is to him, and demanded they give her a chance. She says, then they disrespected him too, saying she’s the root of all evil. Does he know how much that hurts? He says he’s sorry, and she says, for what? He says, for not being the boyfriend she needs. Esme pouts, and says, as scared as he is about going to Spring Ridge, she’s even more afraid. When he goes away, she’ll have nobody. She’ll be all alone.

Trina tells Josslyn that she doesn’t remember any of that, but it makes sense. She had this feeling in the pit of her stomach like she did something terribly wrong. Josslyn says, Trina did nothing wrong; if she hadn’t been drinking, she wouldn’t have said it. Trina asks if Josslyn can forgive her, and Josslyn says she’s sorry, but she has to ask. Did the alcohol help Trina admit to something she was feeling? Trina says she doesn’t remember, and Josslyn asks if Trina thinks she moved in on Cam when Trina still feelings for him?

Willow tells Michael that she’s sorry to interrupt, but it’s the weirdest thing. She’s looked everywhere, but can’t find her birth certificate. She remembers using it when they got married. Michael says, it’s been a while, and things got moved around. There’s a box of documents in the attic; he can go check for her. She thanks him, and he goes upstairs. Carly says, so Paris? She’s happy for them; they deserve some fun. Willow tells her, that’s kind to say, considering, and Carly says she’s saying it because it’s true. Willow says she wants to apologize again for not telling Carly what she knew about Sonny and Nina, but Carly says she can stop. It wasn’t Willow’s place to tell her. That’s all on Sonny.

Sonny asks how Ned can assume his plan won’t work, if he doesn’t know what Sonny is planning? Ned says, their wives are both intelligent and strong willed, and allergic to BS. He learned that Olivia just needed to be heard, and he had to listen, and most important, be patient. Sonny says he’s glad it worked out for Ned and Olivia, but thinks their circumstances are completely different. He lost nine months of his life. Ned says he understands, and Sonny wants Carly back immediately. Sonny asks if Ned blames him, and Ned says, of course (🍷) not, but what does Carly want? Sonny says, she wants time and space, and Ned asks, then why isn’t Sonny giving her that?

Finn asks what Elizabeth is afraid of ruining, and she says, it’s just so awkward. Here they are trying to start out as a couple, and every time they take a tiny step forward, there’s a reminder of Franco. First, her wedding ring fell out of her locker, and now Franco’s artwork is being destroyed. Not to mention, Peter’s trial is around the corner. She wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t want to be saddled with the ghost of her husband. He says, he doesn’t mind. Whatever she needs, he’s here for her, and she says, really? He says, only for as long as it takes, and she says, in that case, she can’t let her past stop her from having a future. He asks what she’s saying, and she says, full steam ahead. He asks what exactly that entails, and she says, maybe another date, and this time they could be alone? and he says, alone? He likes it. Any reason why? She says, so there’s no chance of something collapsing over dinner, and he says she has him convinced. Does she need any help here? She says, no, she’s got it, and he says he knows she does. If she needs him, he’s just a phone call away. She thanks him for not giving up on her, and he says, not a chance, and leaves.

Trina says, she knew Cam had feelings for Josslyn, but didn’t want to tell her because he knew she was grieving Oscar. Then she and Cam got thrown together, and kidnapped together, and developed feelings for each other. It didn’t take them long to realize they weren’t really right for each other. She sees Cam as more like a brother. Josslyn asks if Trina resents her and Cameron being together, but Trina says, of course (🍷) not. Josslyn and Cameron are into each other, and she’d never stand in the way of that. She’s happy for them. She guesses she just has to get used to being the odd man out, and Josslyn says, whatever she can do, she will. Cameron walks in, and says, him too. They love each other. Trina says, and she loves them. This is all so embarrassing. She doesn’t even know how it got dredged up. Josslyn says, she does – Esme.

Spencer puts his hand on Esme’s knee, and says, she’s not alone; she has him. She says, does she? It sure doesn’t feel like it. He says he’s sorry. He’s so freaked out about going to prison, he neglected to consider how it’s impacting her. It’s not what she signed up for. She says she signed up for him; to be with him, and whatever comes with that. He says, she’s proven that time and again. She tried to help him get his dad back, and she stood by him when everyone questioned his inheritance. In return, he’s been weak sauce. She says she hopes he realizes there are plenty of guys who would be happy to have someone as loyal as her in their corner, and he says he knows he’s lucky. He takes her hand, and says, please, can she forgive him?

Stella tells Curtis that Phyllis is asking about what acts are coming to the club, and asks if he can catch her up. He says, absolutely; he was getting another drink anyway. He asks if he can get them anything, but they’re good, and he goes to the bar. Stella sits down, and asks, what’s this Marshall is telling her nephew about him being in Witness Protection?

Willow says, Sonny seemed pretty adamant that he was going to tell Carly when the time was right, but Carly says she thinks that was a lie Sonny was telling himself. Willow says, she doesn’t think Sonny would have told her? and Carly says, she thinks Sonny didn’t want to put himself in a position where he had to choose. Michael comes back, and Willow says, any luck? but he says, no; he can’t find it. She says she can get a replacement online, and Carly says she’ll let them get to their evening. She’ll be back later to see Wiley. Willow says, he’ll be waiting, and Michael walks Carly out. Outside, she says, she doesn’t want him walking her to her car; he’s not wearing a coat. He says, he just wanted to tell her, if the MetroCourt starts to feel too impersonal, she can stay with them. She says she appreciates that, but she did give herself one of the nicest suites they have. Besides, Willow and Wiley are his priorities now. He says, she’s his priority too, and they hug. She says loves him, and wants him to know, whatever happens with her and his dad, they’re both proud of the man he’s become.

Sonny says, he appreciates what Ned is trying to do, but what works for Ned and Olivia, doesn’t necessarily work for him and Carly. Ned says, fair enough; every marriage is different. He just knows, in trying to give someone what we think they want, it’s easy to miss what they actually need. Sonny says he hears Ned, but Carly loves decisive actions and bold moves; it’s what works for them. Ned hopes Sonny is right, and tells Leo, it’s time to start class. He thanks Sonny for being so cool with Leo earlier, and Sonny says, is Ned kidding? He survived pathogens. Leo might have saved his life.

Marshall tells Stella, he doesn’t think he came out and said Witness Protection, and she asks, what exactly did he tell Curtis? He says, that he was in hiding. It’s the truth; it’s just not entirely accurate. She says, that’s a distinction without a difference, and he knows it. Marshall was vague on purpose, so Curtis would draw his own conclusion. Marshall says, but it’s the truth he had to leave to protect his boys, and she says, but he left out some pertinent details. He asks what difference it makes what he said, or did, or what he didn’t do? He’s here now. Curtis not knowing the whole truth isn’t important. She’s not sure that’s the case, and he says, she knows the truth. What part of his story does Curtis need to know in order to embrace being his son? She knows he’d never have left his boys if he’d had a choice. He needs Curtis to understand that, so please don’t take this away from him.

Curtis tells Phyllis, he’s been so busy, he hasn’t had a chance to check in on Nina as much as he’d like to. How’s she doing? Phyllis says, now that her legal difficulties have been settled, she thinks Nina is better. She’s still finding her footing. He says he’s glad Nina has her, and she says she hopes she’s enough.

Esme says, does she forgive Spencer? She rolls her eyes, and says she’d have to think about it. He asks if there’s anything he can do to convince her. He’s not above begging. She says, getting on his knees might do the trick, and kisses him. She puts on her seatbelt, and snuggles next to him, putting her on head on his shoulder. She says, his friends don’t understand them. He doesn’t have to hide from her, and she doesn’t need to pretend with him.

Josslyn says, Esme knew what she was doing when she handed them those drinks, and asked those questions. Cameron says, it’s almost like she planned the whole thing, and Josslyn says, please. Cameron says, okay; she definitely planned it. He just wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, for Spencer’s sake. Trina says she doesn’t know why setting Ava’s car on fire wasn’t a deal breaker, but she’s glad Cameron came to his senses. Josslyn says, it’s too bad that, during the game, no one asked, never have I ever played innocent when I’m clearly a psycho, and Trina says, Esme would have to drink her bodyweight in bourbon. Cameron says he’s headed to the kitchen, and asks if they need anything, but they say, no, and he leaves. Trina says, Josslyn might never forget what she said, but does Josslyn think she can forgive her? Josslyn says, only if Trina can forgive her for not being considerate of her feelings, and Trina says, then they’re good. Josslyn says, always, and Trina says, you’ve got to wonder. Does Josslyn think Esme is just a mean girl, or is there something more? Josslyn says, it’s definitely more.

Elizabeth guesses that’s that, and gets ready to leave, but the door suddenly slams shut. She tries it, and can’t get it to open. She says, hello? and then gets it open. She goes out into the hall, but she doesn’t see anything, and says, it must have been a draft. She goes back in, picks up the box of Franco’s artwork, turns out the lights, and closes the door.

Stella says, she shouldn’t have to explain this to Marshall, but apparently, she does. Keeping the truth from Curtis is like playing with fire, and she will not allow her nephew to be burned. He asks if she really thinks he’d do anything to hurt his boy, and she says, not on purpose. He says, then let him have this chance, when Curtis comes back. He says, the wings sounded so good, he asked Phyllis to bring them a dozen… If that works for Stella. She says, whatever makes him happy.

Spencer glances at Esme, asleep on his shoulder, and takes out his phone. He texts Trina, saying, worried about u. Text me.

Cameron gives Josslyn a coffee mug, and Trina sees the text came in, but ignores it. Cameron says, now Trina, but she says, no. She’s had more than enough to drink tonight. He says, it’s just cider; no alcohol, just sugar. She takes it, saying, that, she can do. He wants to propose a toast, and Josslyn asks if they’re drinking to never having to do anything Esme tells them again. Trina says, here, here, and Cameron says, he was aiming for something more positive. To best friends. Trina and Josslyn say, to best friends, and they all clink mugs.  

Carly tells Michael, stay warm, and he goes back inside. Her phone rings.

Michael asks if Willow is okay, and she says, she was trying to order a copy of her birth certificate off the state’s online portal. He says, no luck? Don’t worry. There’s still time to get an expedited passport. She says, it’s not the website that’s the issue; it’s her birth certificate. There’s no record it exists.

On the phone, Sonny says he knows Carly wants space, and respects that. She says, and yet he called. He says, he’ll give her all the space she needs if she’ll give him one hour on Friday. She asks, why? What’s happening on Friday? He says, one hour. It’s important to him. She says she can give him one hour, and he says, great. He’ll send a text, and give her all the information. He’s giving her space. She smiles, and says, goodnight. They hang up, and he says, it’s a start, and leaves the hospital.

Tomorrow, Ned says, it’s time to marry the woman of his dreams; Britt tells Austin that he might want to revisit his decision; Willow says, Paris here we come; and Sonny says, you can bet on it.

Below Deck

When we last left, Heather had called for the ice cream to be brought to the beach too early, and Rachel was pissed.

Heather suggests they keep it in the cooler, but Rachel says she doesn’t care anymore. Rayna tells Fraser, Heather is a f***ing bitch, and the guests ask for more lobster. Heather tells Rachel that she tried to communicate, and in Heather’s interview, she says, she can see the stress is getting to Rachel. She’s trying to step back, but she’s going to put on her fireproof suit, and hope she doesn’t go up in flames. On the boat, Wes chats up Kaylee, and in his interview, he says, she’s super attractive. He guesses he’s all about third stews, and misses Jessica. He tells Kaylee that when she’s done, she should come down and hang out. Eddie nails Wes to clean before the guests arrive, and Wes tells Kaylee, never mind. Rachel says, the ice cream is foamy, and Rayna says, but it tastes good. Heather tells the guests that the water is amazing, and some of them get in. Eddie picks up Rachel and Heather, and takes them back to the boat. One of the guests finds a sand dollar, and there’s major excitement. I just think, nice of you to wrest it from its home, thereby killing it. 😟  

Back on the boat, Rachel tells Eddie that she’s going to Miami after this. She’s bought a bus; a full sized Bluebird with a commercial kitchen. She’s going on a real road trip. In Rachel’s interview, she says, she bought a 40 foot bus, so she can hit everyone she doesn’t like. It’s no longer metaphoric; it’s literal. Eddie goes to pick up the guests, and one tells him that they loved Hamilton, and he says he heard Hamilton stopped by. When they get back to the boat, the guests have a shot, and primary Stephanie tells Heather that they’d like the captain to eat dinner with them. The stews blow up balloons, and Heather says, the dinner theme is Alexander Glamilton. Jake tells Fraser about letting Paris know he’s taking an 8 day holiday in Miami after the season. Fraser says he’s thinking of taking two weeks Miami, and asks if Jake wants to share a hotel. Heather asks Eddie for a quick moment with him and Jake on the bridge. Eddie tells Captain Lee that he’s sure she’s going to ask them to do something stupid. Heather tells them to approach the idea with an open mind. The guests have requested to see Alexander Hamilton be shot. He can use the same outfit and she’ll find one for Jake to be Aaron Burr. The captain says, the only thing that would give him pleasure in seeing Eddie get shot is if he does the shooting. She asks if he wants to be Burr, and it’s a quick, hard no. In Captain Lee’s interview, he says he thinks it’s cheesy, but if the guests want it, it’s what they get. Eddie says he’s down for this sh*t.

Rachel wants a silent galley for dinner, and in her interview, she says, it’s the last charter, and she’s going to be busy. Rayna goes to the galley to help, and Rachel repeats that she wants it silent. The captain puts on his white dress uniform, and everyone is seated. The guests are impressed with the captain, and primary Darin says, their kids are worried they’re bored. The first course is pronounced delicious, and Rachel thanks Kaylee for being understanding about the quiet. In Kaylee’s interview, she says she’s terrified. She doesn’t want to say or do anything, or even look at Rachel. She doesn’t want to get in Rachel’s way. Darin says the captain has good kids working on the boat, and the captain suggests sending some of the crew back with them. Except for Rachel. For Rachel, he could get two or three Eddies. Heather dares to tell Rachel that the guests are loving it, and in her interview, Rachel says, she made it clear no socializing in the galley. Just take the food up; that’s it. Rayna tells Heather that Rachel does not have the time, and Rachel does the cloche thing with some Kobi beef with pearl onions. Captain Lee jokes that it really sucks. In Rachel’s interview, she says she loves presentation; it’s everything. She’s made chocolate boxes, and she’s going to put sh*t on them, then burn them, and make them amazing. Jake and Eddie get into their costumes. Rachel tries to coat the chocolate boxes with white chocolate, but something goes wrong, and she says, the white chocolate is f***ed. That’s what happens when she’s distracted. She’s about to eat everyone’s face off. She throws it all in a sink, and says she doesn’t care anymore. She has to improvise.

Captain Lee tells the guests about cruising in the Bahamas, and how nurse sharks will come up to the boat. He says, they’re docile creatures, and the crew would jump in the water, freaking out the guests. We get the occasional curious nurse shark here that will come up close to the beach, and they never bother anyone. Rachel concocts a cherries jubilee, bringing it up along with tiny pitchers of (I think) chocolate sauce. Heather says, and for the grand finale, Eddie and Jake are here for them to witness the reenactment of a duel. It’s not a long duel, but Eddie’s death takes about the same amount of time. The captain says, that’s what happens when you feed the animals, and in Eddie’s interview, he says he’s still got it. Captain Lee tells the guests that he has captain stuff to do.

Since Rachel isn’t in the galley, Heather thanks Rayna, and says the guests loved it. Rayna ignores her, and in Rayna’s interview, she says, she and Heather will never see eye to eye. She’ll work with Heather, but they’ll never be friends. Bye, bitch. Heather says, best night ever. Holy! If not even being civil is Rayna’s way of working with someone, I’d hate to see if she was working against them. Fraser asks how Jake feels after his performance, and Jake says he’d do it again. Rachel tells Heather that she’s sorry about it having to be super quiet. Heather says, they survived, and Rachel says, at least it’s done. Heather says she liked working with Rachel, and Rachel says she’d like doing another season with Heather. Heather asks if Rachel thinks she can handle all this.

Eddie chases Rachel with a Bible, and she hisses. Heather asks Fraser, what’s the best way for her to handle Rayna; Rayna won’t even talk to her. Fraser says, Rayna’s not even giving her a chance, and Heather says, she claims she is. In Heather’s interview, she says, she’s apologized a bunch of times, and Rayna says, it’s all good. She takes Rayna at her word, and then Rayna ignores her. What is she supposed to do? Fraser tells her to just smile, and not say anything she doesn’t have to. Captain Lee tells Eddie that you always need to plan a docking. He’s going to pop Eddie’s cherry. Eddie says, he’s never docked a boat this big, and the captain says, the first time he did, it scared the hell out of him. He’s exited for Eddie. He’ll no longer be a virgin in that department. Rachel makes the last breakfast, and Darin announces he’s a muffin connoisseur. Stephanie says she doesn’t want to go back to the cold and snow. Captain Lee says he feels like he’s about to give birth, and Eddie says, that sounds like a personal problem.

In Eddie’s interview, he says, today is the culmination of the season for him. His palms are sweating, and his adrenaline is high. A crash is always a fear. Eddie discovers the bow thruster isn’t working outside, and the engineer is called. Captain Lee says, he’ll take control from inside, and in his interview, Eddie says, it’s his one opportunity to dock the ship, and he can’t do it. It sucks. The engineer discovers the thruster was depressed, and the captain tells Eddie to give it another shot. He gives Eddie instructions as Eddie docks, and the docking is successful. I have to mention, there are literally no other boats at the dock. Eddie thanks the deck team for making him look good. He tells the captain, it was easy, and exaggerates his hand shaking as he lifts his water bottle.

The crew meets on the aft deck to say goodbye to the guests. Stephanie says, it was the trip of a lifetime, and thanks the captain. She tells Eddie and Jake that they loved the Hamilton bit, and gives Captain Lee the tip envelope. The crew works for a hot minute, and the captain calls them to the crew mess for the tip meeting. He tells them that it went pretty good, and tells Rachel that her food was over the top. He tells Eddie, good job docking, and says, Eddie made his job easier. Everyone did a good job. The tip is $17K, or $1400 each, and the captain says, they made a total of $147K for the season. He tells them to go out tonight, and Jake says, he knows it’s going to be a great night. In Jake’s interview, he says he’s ready to party; he can’t wait. He and Wes jump into the water, followed by Rayna and Kaylee, who, no surprise, Rayna has taken a shine to. The captain watches them, and laughs. The crew starts drinking in the taxis, and Jake kisses Rayna.  

Eddie says, he’s so excited see another part of the island, and they drive into the jungle, where there’s a restaurant in a clearing. They watch the sunset, and Fraser tells Heather not to be affected by Rayna’s behavior. She’s better than this. Water off a duck’s back. There’s also a gift shop, and they go in to check it out. They sit at their private table, and Heather says, multiple times, the various departments leaned on each other, and she appreciates all of them. Fraser says, they had each other’s backs, and Eddie suggests a shot. Rayna says how much they love Kaylee, and Heather says, they’d been stressing over it before Kaylee came. Rayna says, they didn’t know if she’d be another Heather, and points out that Heather used the n-word. I feel like I’m in Groundhog Day. Eddie says he’s bored, and Heather suggests he jump in the fountain. Which he does. Rayna tells Fraser that her petty speedometer is on 100,000, whatever that means. She doesn’t want Heather to talk to her, and Fraser says, he thinks Heather is trying, but Rayna says she’s not going to be friends with a white person who says the n-word. In Fraser’s interview, he says he’s close to both Rayna and Heather. It’s obvious Rayna is trying to provoke Heather, which isn’t nice, although Rayna has every right to be pissed. Can’t they all be civil, and enjoy the night? That’s all he’s asking for. Agreed on Rayna having the right to be pissed, but what she doesn’t have the right to do is take Heather on a roller coaster ride; saying it’s all good, being passive/aggressive in showing it’s not good, then saying it’s good, and getting mad all over again. At best, immature behavior, and at worst, psychotic behavior. Eddie buys some new clothes that look like something you’d get in a Florida variety store. They get in the taxis to go back.

Rayna says Kaylee is riding with them, since she has more fun with them, and Heather says, that’s what she thinks, but Kaylee lived with her for six months. Heather heads for the other taxi, and Rayna – for some bizarre, unknown reason – says, and Heather was the rudest to her. I say bizarre, unknown reason because I highly doubt Kaylee said anything like that. Heather tells Rayna to shut her mouth or say it to her face, and Eddie says, oh sh*t. In Heather’s interview, she says, she doesn’t know why Rayna has this attitude. She’s at a loss. Rayna tells Heather that she doesn’t like white people who say the n-word, and Heather says, Rayna told her everything was okay. Rayna repeats that she doesn’t like white people who say the n-word, and Heather gets on her knees and begs forgiveness. Rayna says she might as well get up, because there is no forgiveness. Heather says, that’s her prerogative, and Rayna says, Heather is causing a scene. Eddie steers Rayna away from Heather, and in her interview, Heather says, she wasn’t expecting it to come up again. She tried to have a conversation with Rayna, and Rayna said everything was okay. She understands Rayna’s point-of-view, and even why Rayna doesn’t want to forgive her. She recognizes that, but wants Rayna to see her and not her mistakes. Heather starts to cry, and Rayna curses her out in the taxi. Wes says, Heather admitted to it, and Rayna tells him to shut up. He’s f***ing Black, and should understand. Fraser says, for f***’s sake, and Rayna tells Wes, STFU. He’s not Black. In Wes’s interview, he says it’s painful that Rayna would so easily throw away somebody who’s wanted to help her. He’s deeply hurt. Heather asks Rachel to reason with Rayna, and in Rayna’s interview, she says, she deserves to be upset, but they’re all drunk, and this is not the place. She’s trying not to be the angry Black person, but there’s only so much she can handle. Rachel and Rayna get in a taxi together.

Back at the boat, everyone goes their separate ways. Rachel holds Heather in her bunk, and Rayna gets in Jake’s bunk. In the morning, Wes says, what’s happening above him? He wants out. He jets, and in the galley, Eddie tells whoever that he doesn’t know what to say about last night. Rachel opens champagne, and Wes tells Rayna, what she said wasn’t cool. Rayna says, she gets it, but doesn’t need anybody giving Heather a pass. Wes says he may be from the islands, but he was mostly brought up in the states. Rayna walks away without finishing the conversation, which is no surprise. She’ll probably get mad later and rage text him. Heather says she appreciates Rachel, and Rachel says, same. Heather gets her. In Kaylee’s interview, she wonders how it can be over. She just got here. After this, she imagines living in a van, not working. That’s the goal. Hashtag, VanLife. In Wes’s interview, he says he misses his sailboat, and hopes it hasn’t sunk. He has so much to take home. He’s excited to chill TF out. Rayna says she loves him, and gives him a hug. Jake says, it’s been a pleasure, and Rayna yells to Rachel that she’s leaving. Rachel tells Heather to just be civil.

Captain Lee tells Eddie, you did good, kid. And in a twist to confuse us all, Rayna hugs Heather. Heather says she wishes Rayna the best, and prays Rayna will feel that her apology is from the heart. In Rayna’s interview, she says, how much liquor was involved was no excuse, but she wants to move past it. She says she doesn’t want to leave Rachel, and Rachel thanks her for her help. In her interview, Rayna says, it’s hard to say goodbye to Rachel. She sees herself as a chef, and it will take time, but there’s no challenge she can’t do. She can’t see herself as having a goal and not accomplishing it.

Rachel goes to the bridge to say goodbye to Captain Lee, who says he’s still waiting for the same meal twice. She can put that on her resumé. Rachel says, put that in your cloche and smoke it. In the captain’s interview, he says, it was Rachel’s season of redemption. She upped her game, and did herself proud. If you looked inside her mind, it would be like a roller coaster. It would scare the hell out of you, but you’d like it. In Eddie’s interview, he says, Jake is a strange guy. He doesn’t give a f***, and does what makes him happy. Eddie respects that. Jake is his favorite. In Fraser’s interview, he says he’s learned so much. He wants to be chief stew, and has a lot to learn still, but he’s ready. Fingers crossed he gets the chance. Eddie says Rachel killed it, and they hug. He says he adores her. Heather says goodbye to Rachel, and they dance around, then hug. In Rachel’s interview, she says she’s going to travel. She can’t wait to start her journey on the bus. I’ll be at a parking lot near you. Heather tells Captain Lee, they survived, and he says, they kicked ass. In Heather’s interview, she says, she’s looking forward to the next chance to be even better.

Eddie and the captain sit with their feet up. Captain Lee says, they got through it, and Eddie says he had an interesting season as first officer. The crew had a lot of issues. The captain says, Eddie was out of his comfort zone, but that was good for him. In Captain Lee’s interview, he said, when it’s time for him to hang up his stripes, he’d like to see Eddie be captain. You’ve done well, grasshopper. He says he’s going to miss Eddie, but he’s sure their paths will cross again. Eddie says it’s great working for the captain, but Captain Lee says, Eddie doesn’t work for him; Eddie works with him. In Eddie’s interview, he says, the captain challenged him more in this position, but overall, he loves his boat pop-pop. He and the captain hug, and Eddie leaves. The captain says he’s going to miss Eddie. He’d better get his ass packed.  

There was no preview because this was the finale. No doubt the Reunion will be next. I’m pretty sure Rayna will be pissed off again by then.

💘 See You Next Month…

Come join me for the first soap of February tomorrow. The Real Housewives of New Jersey is also starting its new season, but I’m not sure how invested I’ll be in that. So perhaps a little NJ, a little tea; who knows? But until then, stay safe, stay a step ahead, and stay not missing what someone actually needs, in trying to give them what you think they want.