What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

 

⚠ SPOILER ALERT: This show was not on today in the US, and will be shown tomorrow. So if you don’t want to know yet, skip down to all the Wives.

General Hospital

Jason tells Sonny, they got everything out, and Sonny tells him to check the routes again. He wants everything covered. Jason asks if Sonny is being pressured, but Sonny says, people get sloppy, and he just wants to double-check. One more thing. What the hell is going on with Carly?

At the hospital, Jax gives Carly a blueberry smoothie. She asks if there’s kelp in it, and he says, of course (🍷) not. She tastes it, and admits it’s pretty good. Jax says, when this is over, he has a bottle of Bordeaux with her name on it. She says she thought it was going to be over tonight.

Obrecht asks how Charlotte is, and Valentin says, warm, dry and safe. Nina says Charlotte wanted to read another chapter of Little Women, but her eyes were closed by the time they started. Obrecht tells them, hypothermia can be exhausting, but Nina says Charlotte wouldn’t be home if she had hypothermia. The doctors say she’s fine. Obrecht no thanks to that poor excuse of a mother. What was Lulu thinking, letting Charlotte fall into the harbor? Valentin says, she didn’t fall; she jumped.

Curtis meets Laura, Doc, and Lulu at Charlie’s. He asks how Lulu is holding up, and she says she’s still in shock. All of a sudden, Charlotte took a running jump off the pier. She was sure her bodyguard was going to save her. Curtis says, what about a bodyguard? Doc says, imaginary. Apparently, Charlotte was willing to risk her life to prove he was real.

Alone at the gallery, Ava pours herself a martini. She says, here’s to you, Helena Cassadine. You made one hell of an exit. What more can a gal ask? She hears footsteps behind her, and says she knew he’d show up. He’s awful predictable – she picks up her gun and turns around – for a dead man. It’s Nikolas, and she says she’d offer to fix him a martini, but her hands are full. He says she doesn’t need the gun. She says she needed the last time he broke in, when she asked him to take off his mask. He was so real, she could have touched him. So real, she could have pulled the trigger, if she hadn’t fainted dead away. Fortunately, she’s feeling much steadier tonight.

At the MetroCourt, Lucy explains to potential investor Alyssa that the relaunch of Deception is going to include spas and the whole wellness movement, but they also have a new signature line of cosmetics; strictly organic. Alyssa says let her stop Lucy there, but Lucy says at least let her show the power point presentation. Alyssa says she loved Deception in the early 90s, but can’t make a serious investment in nostalgia, unless she has… Lucy sees Sasha walk in with Michael, and says, she does. Hold that thought. She goes over to Sasha, and asks her to please go along with whatever she does. She brings Sasha to the table, and tells Alyssa that Sasha is a dear friend who is going to help make her vision happen. May she present the new face of Deception, Sasha Gilmore.

Valentin says he’s going to check on Charlotte. He wants to be there if she wakes up. Obrecht tells Nina, for such a cold-blooded manipulator, he certainly loves that child. Nina says, Obrecht is telling her Valentin is a manipulator? Obrecht says, a leopard doesn’t change its spots, and Nina says, neither does a leopardess. She knows Obrecht helped Valentin pass Sasha off as her daughter, and she’s giving Obrecht one last chance to tell her how and why.

Curtis says he’s there to help any way he can, but he’s not sure why he’s there. Laura says they may need him to dig up some dirt on Valentin. Something they could use against him in a custody battle. Curtis thought the custody was already settled, but Lulu says, not anymore. He says it’s her fault since she wasn’t watching Charlotte closely enough. Laura says, of course (🍷) she was, and Doc says, no one could doubt that. Lulu says, Valentin does. He wants to go back to family court, and amend the custody order. Laura says, he’s going to fail. She’s sure there are enough witnesses who will testify for Lulu. Curtis says he’s sure he can dig up something they can use. Curtis wants to hear more about the bodyguard, and Lulu says she thought it was part of a game. Charlotte has been talking about him non-stop. Doc thinks it’s important they figure out why Charlotte invented him in the first place.

Ava asks why Nikolas is there. He says she must know, but she says tell her anyway. He says, when the painting burned, did the codicil burn with it? She says he’ll have to do better than that, and he asks what she wants. She says, an apology to start. On second thought, anything he says would be a lie. Just like his supposed death. His second supposed death. Not the first one he staged in Port Charles; the one she witnessed in Greece. He says he almost died that day, and she says, but he didn’t. He just let her believe he did. That’s a pattern with him, isn’t it? His mother, his sister, his son. Nikolas let them all grieve for him, twice. Why should she be the exception? Because they had a few nice chats, an unexpected connection, and shared a kiss? She’d never kissed a prince. Sounds like a fairytale, but in her case, the prince turned out to be a liar and a user. Now she gets to decide how the fairytale ends.

Jax tells Carly, just as the gavel came down, the painting burst into flames. Now Helena’s portrait is just a pile of ashes. Carly says, Ava rigged the painting to burn? Jax says, Ava claimed she didn’t, and that it was either Helena or the artist, playing a practical joke from beyond the grave. Carly hopes he’s not on the hook for the money, but he says, the painting was never delivered, so the sale is null and void. That’s the good news. The bad news is, the codicil either burned with the painting, or Ava has it.

Sonny tells Jason, Carly is hiding something. Does he know what? Jason says, no, and Sonny asks if she said she was worried about anything or asked for his help. Jason says she didn’t, and Sonny says, then she’s doing this alone, which makes it worse. Jason asks when it started, and Sonny says, it was after Halloween, when Josslyn wanted to move in with Jax part time. He thought Jax would be all over that, but he turned it down. Sonny asked Carly why, and she picked a fight with him. She’s trying to distract him, and when he asks why, she picks another fight with him. He thinks Jax is into something he shouldn’t be, and Carly is protecting him.

Nikolas tells Ava, it doesn’t have to be this way, but she says, it does. Start at the beginning. Nikolas and Valentin were fighting. The gun went off… He says, Valentin shot him, and Ava says she hasn’t told anyone this, but she saw him and Valentin struggling over the gun. From Valentin’s perspective, he was acting in self-defense. He says she told Spencer that Valentin murdered him. Ava says, which clearly, he did not. He says she told Spencer that she’d help him prove it was wrongful death, and she sold out to Valentin. She says she was horribly scarred and wanted her face back. All she had to do was betray his memory, but it turns out there was nothing to betray because he’s been alive the whole time. He says she makes it sound like he was on vacation, and she says, where has he been? And what payoff justified the hell he’s put them all through?

Carly tells Jax, none of this is going to turn out the way Nikolas wants. He’s not going to reclaim the Cassadine fortune or sell Jax the shipping company. Spencer is away at boarding school, and well taken care of. On the other hand, Josslyn will be devastated if he gets deported again. Make sure that doesn’t happen. Call the cops and turn Nikolas in.

Jason asks if Sonny and Carly have been fighting about anything real, and Sonny says, his dad. Sonny still thinks there’s a way to help him, but Carly doesn’t agree. He did have a bad spell on Thanksgiving, and Griff was in town, so Sonny had him look at Mike’s chart. He said Mike’s Alzheimer’s is progressing. Jason says he’s sorry, but Sonny says, it’s not over. Griff is checking into something in Sweden and maybe even the US. He asks what Jason thinks, but Jason says it’s not his call. Sonny wants to know anyway, and Jason tells him to put himself in Mike’s place. If it was Sonny’s kids making the decisions, what would he want? Sonny says he’d want them to make a choice they can live with. He’s already lived his life. He’d want them to be at peace. Jason thinks Mike would want that for him.

Doc says, recently, Charlotte’s life has been filled with uncertainty. Dante’s absence, his brief tumultuous return, Nina and Valentin’s aborted wedding. She’s a little girl, whose world has been in constant upheaval. Laura says, and that was before she was kidnapped by Cassandra. Lulu says, Charlotte knows Cassandra has a grudge against her father. Some part of her must know it’s Valentin’s fault, and she doesn’t want to blame him. Doc says, the bodyguard is a manifestation of Charlotte’s need to feel secure and safe. Laura says, and jumping into the harbor when she knows he’s not real? and Doc says, a cry for help. Lulu says she has to speak with Valentin now; tonight. She gets up, and Laura says, Valentin might not be receptive right now, but Lulu doesn’t care. Right now, Charlotte needs stability, not another tug-of-war custody battle. Curtis says he’s going with her, for moral support and back-up. Laura thinks it’s a good idea, and Lulu says she appreciates the offer, but Charlotte is her daughter. It’s on her to settle this.

Nina tells Obrecht that she’s lost so many people she loves; she can’t lose Obrecht too. Tell her the truth. Obrecht asks if she’s sure she wants to know. Ignorance really can be bliss. She has a man who loves her, and a stepdaughter who adores her. Is the truth really more important than the family she’s always wanted? Nina says she wants the truth, and then she’ll decide for herself. Did Obrecht help Valentin fake the original DNA test? Obrecht says, no, but she knows how he did it.

Lucy says it’s lovely for Michael to join them, and asks if Alyssa has met him. Alyssa says, not personally, but Chad Bailey speaks highly of him. Michael says Chad swears Alyssa has the uncanny ability to spot the next big thing. Alyssa doesn’t know if she’d go that far, but she’s curious as to why he’s there. Is ELQ in the beauty market? and he says they’re in a lot of markets. He sees Sonny come in, and excuses himself, saying his father doesn’t like to be kept waiting. When he’s gone, Alyssa asks if that’s the Sonny Corinthos, the… and Sasha says, coffee importer and noted philanthropist; that’s him.

At the bar, Michael asks if Sonny was looking for him. Sonny says if Michael was in his place, and he had Alzheimer’s that had progressed to the point where he didn’t recognize Michael, would he still look for a cure, even if it was a long shot? Or would he just let Sonny go?

Obrecht says she attended Nina’s mother’s funeral. She was a fugitive at the time, but disguised herself as a homeless woman, and kept to the back of the church. When the service was over, and everyone was gone, Valentin returned with a DNA kit. She watched him take a swab from her mother’s body. Nina says, so from the moment she found Sasha, Obrecht knew she was fake. Obrecht says, she was reasonably certain Sasha was working for Valentin. Nina says she thought Obrecht loved her. Why wouldn’t she say something?

Lulu goes to Windymere, and Valentin asks what she’s doing there. She says she’s there to see him. Charlotte almost drowned tonight, and they have to do better for her.

Curtis says, if Valentin is going to compromise, it would definitely be for Charlotte’s sake, but if he opts for a custody fight, Curtis promises to bring them all the dirt he can find. Laura says they’re lucky to have him on their side. Curtis heads to the bar for a real drink. Laura tells Doc, there’s something else she didn’t want Lulu to know right away, but it might mean something. He says, lucky for her, she’s married to a highly-skilled psychiatrist who knows how to keep a secret. She says, Charlotte showed her a picture of her secret bodyguard. It was picture of Nikolas.

Nikolas tells Ava, he was in shock and bleeding. It was a miracle someone found him and pulled him out. It was a yacht crew who’d just dropped off their owner, and were en route home to Athens. He was able to get medical attention. She says, so while they were there grieving his watery death, he was warm and dry and recuperating in Athens. He says he was still considered a fugitive, and she says, criminal charges from faking his death the first time. The story isn’t doing him any favors. He says he was waiting for Valentin to stake his claim, using the papers he forced Nikolas to sign, while she was being held at gunpoint. He guesses they’ve come full circle, and she says, yes. He was very chivalrous – then. Not so much when he was telling her Kiki was damned. He says he’s not proud of that, and she says either he’s truly ashamed or good at faking it. Either way, it’s of no consequence. So he was waiting for Valentin to use the papers… Nikolas says, he never did. He didn’t need to. Mikkos left him everything. But Mikkos had one last surprise; a codicil disinheriting Valentin and returning everything to him, and it was hidden in Helena’s portrait. The one she destroyed.

Jax tells Carly, they have to let this play out until New Year’s. He has reason to believe Valentin is going to be suffering a reversal of fortune very soon, and it will give Nikolas an opening. She asks, what kind of opening? And what’s going on with Valentin? He says, sorry, but she doesn’t want him sorry. She wants him to answer her questions. Jason shows up, and asks if everything is okay.

Ava tells Nikolas, if he didn’t want the painting destroyed, he should have told her it was important instead of gaslighting her. How long was he having her watched? He says, less than a month, and it was his mother who he was having watched. She says, so he never thought about her at all, but he says he did. He thought of everything there. The wife he missed, the people he loved; he thought about coming forward, but knew if he did, he’d be handing everything to Valentin. She asks if the codicil was supposed to fix all that, and he says, it would have fixed everything. It would have given back everything that was rightfully his. She says, too bad it’s nothing but ashes, and he says, is it? which is exactly what I’ve been thinking.

Laura tells Doc, Charlotte was disappointed that her bodyguard didn’t rescue her. He says, in her mind, her bodyguard is real, and Laura says, absolutely. She offered to show Laura a picture of him, then showed her the picture of Nikolas on Lulu’s phone. Doc asks how much Charlotte knows about Nikolas, and Laura says, she doesn’t know. She’s sure Charlotte has heard her and Lulu talking about him, but could that be enough for her to make him her secret bodyguard? Doc says, it’s possible. He thinks it’s more likely she recognized Nikolas, and chose him for a reason.

Lulu tells Valentin that Doc said Charlotte jumping in the harbor was a cry for help. She’s had so much turmoil. She must have made up the bodyguard because she doesn’t trust them to make her world safe. He says it sounds like she’s admitting she’s part of the problem.

Obrecht tells Nina, she needed leverage over Valentin. She told him what she’d witnessed, and blackmailed him. Nina asks if Obrecht didn’t care that she was falling in love with her daughter, and Obrecht says, it was already too late. Nina was already in love with her daughter, and to Valentin’s credit, the more time she spent with Sasha, the more she was convinced that Sasha was a good daughter to her. Sasha wasn’t trying to take advantage, and Nina was happy. If that little snoop Lulu hadn’t eavesdropped, and made it her business to interrupt the wedding, Nina could still be happy. Nina asks if Obrecht isn’t the least bit sorry, and Obrecht says, sorrier than she can say, but she might have a way to make amends.

Sasha tells Alyssa, classic isn’t the same as old. They’re going to use the history of Deception’s glamour and style to target the current generation. Alyssa says, tell her more.

Michael tells Sonny that he’d have to weigh his need to keep Sonny against his quality of life. Would it be worth putting him through treatment that might cause him to suffer or get worse, or refuse the treatment, and later find out it could have saved him? Sonny says he asked himself that, but he’s not getting an answer. Michael asks what Carly thinks, and Sonny says, they’re having problems right now. She probably thinks part of it is his dad; part of it is, they just don’t agree. Michael says, talk to her anyway. Even if she thinks he’s dead wrong, she’ll always have his back.

Jax tells Jason that he was just trying to convince Carly to drink her smoothie. Carly says, he swears there’s no kelp in it. She’s choosing to trust him. Jax says she won’t be disappointed, and leaves. Jason says, what happened? and Carly says, Jax is in trouble.

Ava laughs, saying Nikolas went through all that trouble, breaking and entering, only to find out Valentin beat him to it, but neither of them found the painting. He asks where it was, and she says, hiding in plain sight. She left it in the original frame, and covered it with a rather pedestrian abstract. He asks if she found the codicil, and she says she has to thank him. For a while, she was concerned that Valentin would find the portrait, but then he showed up, and created the perfect diversion. From then on, all she had to worry about was checking herself out of a mental hospital, and searching the painting. Once she knew what she was looking for, it wasn’t difficult to find. He says she has the codicil, and she says, of course (🍷) she does.

Obrecht gives Nina an envelope, and tells her to see for herself. After Valentin left the church, she took a few strands of her sister’s hair. Nina can run her own test. It should yield the same results as the one Valentin ran; mother and daughter.

Lulu tells Valentin, she’s not the one who got Charlotte kidnapped. Cassandra went after Charlotte because of him. He says Charlotte was with Lulu when Cassandra took her, and was with Lulu when she jumped into the harbor. It sounds like Lulu is the one not keeping their daughter safe. She asks him to please not drag their daughter into a custody fight, and he says he was just hoping she’d be a good mother. She says she loves Charlotte. He’s the one who’s selfish. He spoils Charlotte, and indulges her worst impulses. He says he treats Charlotte like she’s Charlotte. Lulu treats Charlotte like she’s an extension of herself, proving she’s perfect. She calls him a bastard, and he says she despises him and he despises her back. Why don’t they let the family court decide? She says, let’s do that, and she’s going to prove he’s unfit to be anywhere near Charlotte. She walks out, and Valentin joins Nina and Obrecht. Nina says, Lulu sounded upset, and he says, it’s been an upsetting evening. Obrecht says, it’s been quite stressful, and excuses herself to go to bed. Valentin asks if Nina is all right. She says, no, and he says, him neither, and they hug.

Alyssa says her COO will contact Lucy directly about financial arrangements. Lucy says they’ll talk soon. Ta! Alyssa goes down in the elevator, and Lucy squeals, saying, Deception is back, baby!

Jax sees Curtis at Charlie’s, and Curtis asks if there’s a next step in Jax’s plan against Valentin. Or is he cutting his losses now that the painting has been destroyed? Jax says, the plan is still in place, but he thinks it’s time for a change in tactics.

Jason tells Carly, the getaway van was a rental, and it was charged to Jax’s credit card. The same night, he went to question Jax, and it was obvious he was covering something up. He’ll tell her what he told Jax. He’ll do anything for her and Josslyn, even if it means helping Jax, but she has to tell him what’s gong on. Carly says, Jax is into something illegal, and if Sonny finds out, he’ll have Jax deported. So Sonny can’t find out. Her family could be ripped apart before Donna is six months old. She won’t do that to her kids or Sonny. He’s grieving over Mike, and he’ll lash out in anger. Before he realizes what he’s done, it will be too late. Jason says, let him fix it. Sonny comes out of the elevator, sees them talking, and walks the other way. Carly says she can’t ask Jason to get involved, but he says he’s offering. She says she loves him for it, but Jax said he’d have everything handled by New Year’s Eve. If he doesn’t, she’ll tell Jason everything. She promises.

On the phone, Sonny says he needs help. Carly’s in trouble.

Lucy says they did it. They locked down Alyssa, and it’s all due to Sasha. Sasha says Lucy wants her to be the face of Deception, but it doesn’t appeal to her unless she has a stake in the company; an equity partnership. Lucy says, no, but Sasha says it’s going to be her face out there. She wants a say in the product. Lucy says she has a point, so she’ll generously give Sasha point five percent. Sasha asks Michael to be her agent, and he says, fifty percent. Lucy laughs, and says, no, no, no, no, no. Two. Michael says she clearly doesn’t want Sasha as much as she claims. Lucy says she does. Can they just make it a realistic, reasonable number? Michael says, thirty percent; take it or leave it. Lucy says, that’s grand larceny, and Michael says she started the day with a business plan, and thanks to Sasha, she has an investor and a face of the brand. She deserves her fair share. Lucy says, it’s not fair. It’s highway robbery. Michael says Lucy will still be the controlling partner, and Sasha will be very motivated to see that Deception succeeds. Lucy says, fine. Thirty percent. Michael says he’ll have his attorney draw up the papers, and Lucy says he’s nothing but a baby-faced shark. He says Lucy is the owner of a viable company, and Lucy tells Sasha, welcome to Deception. They shake hands, and Sasha says they’re going to do great things together.

Doc tells Laura, Charlotte could think of Nikolas as some kind of hero; a flawed prince. Who better to imagine as her rescuer? If Nikolas were still alive, the source of tension between Lulu and Valentin would be gone. It’s possible Charlotte just wants her parents to stop hating each other. Who better to conjure up than the person Charlotte believes could make that happen?

Curtis tells Jax, there’s a custody battle brewing between Valentin and Lulu. If the change in tactics digs up dirt they can use, he’d like to tell Laura. Jax is fine with that. The more trouble for Valentin, the better. Curtis asks what he’s got, and Jax says, at this point, just a name. Charlotte was carried by a surrogate, Claudette Beaulieu. He gives Curtis a picture of Claudette, and says he wants Curtis to find her.

Ava says she doesn’t really need the gun. She knows he’s not going to hurt her. Not as long as she knows where the codicil is. He asks what she wants, and she says he can start by thanking her for not burning the codicil along with the portrait, or handing it over to Valentin. She says, Valentin is a bit of a bastard, but then, so is Nikolas. Spencer is a different story. Since he has a right to the Cassadine fortune, she’d like him to get it. Nikolas asks if the codicil is there, and can she give it to him now? She asks if he really thinks she’s going to make it that easy.

Valentin tells Nina there’s one thing he’s not getting. Charlotte insists this bodyguard is real. He doesn’t know why. All he knows is that Charlotte needs Nina now more than ever, just as he does. Nina suggests he check on Charlotte, to make sure she didn’t overhear anything. He asks her to come with him, and she says she has a phone call to make, and she’ll be right up. He kisses her and goes upstairs.

Nina takes out the plastic bag with Madeline’s hair in it, and scrunches it a little.

ℹ This is where the video ended abruptly, but I think it was the actual end. If there’s anything extra, like if she tosses it in the fire, I’ll let you know tomorrow. There were no previews, so you’ll get those tomorrow too. Unless there’s some other earth shattering news.

The Real Housewives of Dallas

Sadly, we’re back in Dallas, where nobody gets a baby elephant.

LeeAnne visits Stephanie, and asks how Viet Nam was. Stephanie says they got massages every day, since they were so reasonable. She tells LeeAnne that Travis’s dad is weak, but he’s been that way for a while. In her interview, she says they got him into the hospital where he got his medicine. Then Travis’s sister took him back to the US. She asks how LeeAnne is; she seems sad. LeeAnne says she doesn’t want to be the person who’s targeted all the time. It’s not fair or fun. She had an incident with Kameron in private, and now everyone is in on it. Stephanie says LeeAnne has every reason to feel how she does, but she has to watch how she reacts after she’s hurt. In her interview, Stephanie says LeeAnne can be mad without making insensitive comments. She doesn’t want LeeAnne to get into trouble when she has reason to feel the way she does.

Kameron and Kary go out to eat. Kary tells Kameron that they were all upset when Kameron kind of defended LeeAnne at the table. We flash back to that, and Kameron says everyone was destroying LeeAnne. She can’t let LeeAnne get attacked like that. Kary says she was mad that LeeAnne made Kameron cry.

Leeanne tells Stephanie that Kameron was upset when she realized how bad the district was; not about her yelling. Stephanie says D’Andra expressed to her that Kameron was hurt and upset about LeeAnne screaming and manipulating her. LeeAnne says D’Andra wasn’t there, and Stephanie says if LeeAnne hadn’t felt so protective of Kameron, it wouldn’t have been as heated.

Kameron tells Kary that she thinks LeeAnne had had so much anxiety because she was losing control, since Kameron has been hanging out with Kary. Kary thinks LeeAnne is trying to make Kameron feel guilty, and Kameron agrees 100%. She feels horrible about it. Kary wants to move forward in their friendship and doesn’t want LeeAnne in Kameron’s ear. In Kameron’s interview, she says she wants to tell Kary what LeeAnne said, but part of her is holding back. Kary says Kameron loves her, and she’s Kary’s friend, but she also loves LeeAnne, and Kary wants to respect that.

LeeAnne tells Stephanie, has she been wrong about people? Look at her and D’Andra.

Brandi asks if Brooklyn is nervous about tryouts. Brooklyn says, no, and Brandi thinks she’s more nervous than Brooklyn. In Brandi’s interview, she says each girl makes a team, but there are different teams for different skill sets. The team Brooklyn is looking at were national champion for several years. The tryouts are important, and Brooklyn has been working her little bootie off. Brandi has been slipping over the furniture, and it’s exhausting. She’s also been kicked a few times. Brandi watches as the coaches put Brooklyn through all the moves. In her interview, Brandi says they’re having struggles with Brooklyn going into her preteen years, and it’s hard. Cheerleading is an opportunity for them to pull together. One of the coaches films Brooklyn, and Brooklyn messes up a back flip. In Brandi’s interview, she says she’s not a perfect parent, but her children are loved beyond words. She chooses her battles, and she still has two more to go.

While out for dinner, Kary shows Eduardo her website. He likes it, and she says it’s important to her to have her own independence. In her interview, she says Eduardo can’t appreciate her situation because he’s never had to be vulnerable, and always been in control of the money situation. He’s not an empathetic person, and it makes her feel frustrated. They speak in Spanish about speaking Spanish at home, so the kids will learn. Kary wants Eduardo to hear her out. She’s frustrated, and wants financial independence and security. He gets her concern, and says he’s supportive, asks if she’s doing it because she wants independence, or to be fulfilled. She thinks it’s a combination. She doesn’t want to feel so vulnerable; it’s a bad place to be when you don’t have security. He says it bothers him because he thinks he’s been generous. When they got married, he went from zero to four kids in one year. Kary says he’s great with the kids, but when there are issues, he makes it clear that it’s his house and his money. How would he feel if she had it all, and they had a fight, and divorced? He wouldn’t want to be in that position either. They want to move, and she asks if he’d consider putting the house in both their names for her peace of mind. He says it’s in the trust, so he can’t. In Kary’s interview, she says he always says it’s in the trust, and claims it’s out of his hands, but she thinks that’s BS. He suggests getting a different investment property. He’d wants to feel like they’re working together, not against each other. Kary agrees, and they kiss. In her interview, the producer asks Kary if she believes she and Eduardo will spend the rest of their lives together. She hopes so, but has no idea. If he doesn’t give her some security, she’ll have to move on. Eduardo asks if she wants to pick up the check.

D’Andra meets Mama Dee for lunch. Dee asks if Thailand was good, and D’Andra says she had fun, but she and LeeAnne didn’t end on a good note. Dee doesn’t think they’re going to rekindle their relationship. It’s like a bad marriage. In D’Andra’s interview, she doesn’t think any apology or action will help. Like her father would say, it’s time to fish or cut bait. She tells Dee that she showed Travis the new website. We see clip of that, and she shows it to Dee. Dee says, it’s much more updated. In her interview, D’Andra says Travis is a great mentor. As much as she could, she took his advice to heart, and made changes. The improvements have been because she took his advice. Dee thinks the company is moving in the right direction, and D’Andra says it will probably take a turn for the better, but she’s not there yet. She says she was angry, and it was hard to get over. She was hurt, wondering why her mother set her up to fail. Dee says D’Andra knows how she feels, and why she won’t give her a loan from the trust. We flash back to that conversation, and Dee saying D’Andra spends whatever she makes. Dee tells D’Andra that she’s almost 79, and might need care eventually. It’s expensive, especially care at home. D’Andra says there’s plenty of money for Dee’s care and a loan. In D’Andra’s interview, she wonders what Dee is talking about. She pivots, and there’s a new excuse, but she really just doesn’t want to give D’Andra the money. D’Andra says she wants Dee to be proud, and not come back saying I told you so. Dee swears she would never do that, and I choke on my coffee. She says they’ve been through a lot, and she’s proud of D’Andra. She’s gone above and beyond what Dee expected. She wouldn’t change anything about her. Well, maybe not eating so many doughnuts. In her interview, D’Andra says her mother doesn’t want to say made a mistake or she’s sorry. What’s important is salvaging their mother/daughter relationship. She hasn’t gotten where she wants to yet, but when she’s a self-made millionaire, and Dee comes to her for a loan, enjoy social security, bitch. Dee says she wants to travel; she has the assets to do it. D’Andra says, then she has the assets to give her daughter a loan. Maybe she’d better reconsider the travel. She might need the assets for future care.

Court asks if Kameron is excited about tonight, but she says she’s nervous. They haven’t been together since Thailand. She thinks LeeAnne got anxious about not having control, and it got the best of her. That’s why she ended up freaking out. Court asks where LeeAnne’s anxiety is coming from, and Kameron thinks LeeAnne is afraid she’ll lose Kameron as a friend. She’s never liked Kary and when LeeAnne comments on Kary, she pretends not to hear. LeeAnne called Kary the c-word once, and when she got worked up, she called Kary a chirpy Mexican. It borders on racism. Kameron doesn’t want to blurt something out without thinking. In Kameron’s interview, she says she wants to tell Kary, but she’ll be hurt. At same time, if she doesn’t tell Kary, she’ll be the worst friend on the planet. She tells Court that she has years of history with LeeAnne, but she loves Kary. Court says she needs to be honest. If she thinks a wrong has been done, she needs to come clean.

Brandi gets ready for Bruin’s party. The venue is a beautiful rooftop, and all of the decorations are blue. Bryan says he hadn’t realized they were supposed to wear blue, and Brandi says she sent him an invitation and it was on there. In Brandi’s interview, she says she thinks it’s important to celebrate Bruin’s adoption day, since they’re his forever family. Whether he likes it or not, he’s stuck with them. She tears up, and says it makes her sad that she wasn’t there for his actual birthday, but she can be there for this day. Bringing in Bruin’s sibling would be double the trouble, but also double the love. The guests start to arrive. LeeAnne, Stephanie, and Brandi toast to one year. There’s a band, and an excellent family-style spread. At the bar, Jeremy asks if Brooklyn is getting vodka, and D’Andra tells him, don’t encourage bad things.

Kameron and Court pick Kary and Eduardo up in a limo. Kary asks how Kameron is, and Kameron says she’s good, but she has something hanging over her head. She hasn’t been completely honest, and needs to be. When Kary asked if LeeAnne had talked bad about her, she didn’t want Kary to get hurt, but LeeAnne called her the c-word. Kameron isn’t okay with that word, and didn’t want to repeat it. She’s turning herself in because they’re good friends, and she owes it to Kary. Kary thanks her, but Court butts in where it’s none of his business, and says, that’s not the whole story. Kameron says LeeAnne did say something else; she called Kary a chirpy Mexican. She also did an impression of Kary, saying she was a big powerful Mexican. In Kary’s interview, she says she doesn’t like or connect with LeeAnne, but that’s being racist. If LeeAnne had a big heart, she wouldn’t be prejudiced. Eduardo says he has one comment – remember the Alamo. Kameron asks, what’s the Alamo? and Kary says when you mess with one Mexican, you mess with them all. Court says Kameron can’t be a pushover, and Kameron says she doesn’t know what’s gotten into LeeAnne, but it’s out of control.

The bandleader asks everyone to gather around the stage. Brandi has a few words to say. She thanks everyone for coming, and says it’s been an incredible journey. They’re blessed to have Bruin, and family and friends who support and love them. They went through a year of tears and laughter, and having Bruin is really a miracle. In her interview, she says Bruin is one of the biggest blessings in the family. He’s brought love and joy, and was a piece of the family they never knew was missing until he became a part of it. We flash back to when Brandi first held Bruin. She wants tonight to be special, and tells everyone to party. In Brandi’s interview, she says, you never know what’s out there in life until you open yourself up to it. It’s the biggest blessing that Bruin has given them. LeeAnne looks for Kameron, and suggests they sit and talk.

Kary tells Stephanie and Brandi about what LeeAnne said. She says LeeAnne is showing her true colors. She clearly feels strongly about Kary being Mexican. Stephanie says LeeAnne also said something to her about Kary being Mexican, but she thought it was in the heat of the moment.

Kameron tells LeeAnne that sometimes she doesn’t always talk about Kary in a positive way. She asks LeeAnne to explain why she said Kary was a chirpy Mexican. LeeAnne says she doesn’t remember calling her chirpy, but Kary does talk a lot. Kameron says she also referred to Kary as a big powerful Mexican, but LeeAnne says she doesn’t remember that either. If she used the word Mexican, she didn’t mean it to be offensive. LeeAnne asks Kameron what Kary has said about her, and Kameron tells her, Kary said she’s controlling and manipulating. Kameron thinks LeeAnne is uneasy, knowing she’s close with Kary, but LeeAnne says it genuinely doesn’t bother her, which I find doubtful. We flash back to LeeAnne saying that Kary has muted Kameron’s empathy button toward her, and it’s a lonely place to be.

D’Andra asks Stephanie and Kary if Kameron had LeeAnne’s back, but they say she didn’t. Stephanie says, they’re talking right now. LeeAnne asks if Kameron thinks she manipulates her, but Kameron doesn’t think so. She’s not afraid of LeeAnne. If anything, LeeAnne should be afraid of her. LeeAnne wonders what’s happening to Kameron. In her interview, LeeAnne says she doesn’t know who this Kameron is. Does someone have their hand up her ass moving her mouth? She doesn’t sound like herself. Kameron tells LeeAnne that she felt horrible keeping it to herself, and had to get it off her chest. She didn’t want to be fake. She wanted to be a good friend, like she’s being to LeeAnne.

Kary joins them, and says she thinks she’s heard enough tonight. LeeAnne says she heard Kary said she was controlling, and Kary says she’s said that to LeeAnne’s face. LeeAnne didn’t call her the c-word or call her Mexican to her face. LeeAnne says she grew up with a Mexican family, and Kary says LeeAnne is again making it about herself. In LeeAnne’s interview, she says she doesn’t care if someone is Mexican. She’s slept with plenty of Mexicans. It’s not a negative. She’s been there. She sat in Julio Iglesias’s lap. Alrighty then. By now, the others have sidled over, and Kary says LeeAnne isn’t owning it. LeeAnne says, she just did. Kary says she said it to Stephanie too. D’Andra says LeeAnne always preaches equal rights, and LeeAnne tells her, Kary said she has super powers because she’s Mexican. Kary says there’s always a reason or excuse for everything. Brandi asks if anyone wants a shot. Kameron says Kary can say it, but LeeAnne can’t. D’Andra tells LeeAnne, in today’s climate, you can’t say stuff like that. LeeAnne says, in today’s climate, you shouldn’t say a husband is cheating without evidence. Kary says she’s going to get a drink. It’s not worth it.

Brandi asks if Kary is okay, and Kary says she is. D’Andra tells LeeAnne that she thought it was derogatory, but LeeAnne insists it wasn’t. It’s not bad; that’s D’Andra’s opinion. D’Andra says, it’s everyone in the country’s opinion. Kary says LeeAnne didn’t even apologize. D’Andra joins the others, saying she got sucked in the rabbit hole again. LeeAnne Tells Kameron that she didn’t mean it in a derogatory way. In Brandi’s interview, the producer asks if Brandi thinks LeeAnne is racist. Brandi is like, hmm… In their interviews, Stephanie says, no. She thinks LeeAnne just does really dumb sh*t. Brandi doesn’t know if she wants to answer that question. Kary says, LeeAnne isn’t that ignorant. She has to be racist. D’Andra says, what we say is who we are. Kameron says, no. LeeAnne isn’t racist, but she didn’t use her words properly, and she has to fix that. LeeAnne says it’s ridiculous to say she’s racist. Court comes over to Kameron, and says Rachel wants to talk to her about something. LeeAnne says she’s going to apologize to Kary. Court tells Kameron to stay away from LeeAnne because of the racist sh*t she said. Kameron asks where Rachel is, and Court says he was just trying to get Kameron away. In Kameron’s interview, she says instead of being concerned about her reputation, LeeAnne should be concerned about her own.

LeeAnne tells Kary, if that word offends her, she won’t use it again. She didn’t mean it in a derogatory way, and apologizes if she hurt Kary. Kary thanks her for the apology, but says it feels forced. LeeAnne tells her, she wouldn’t have said it if she didn’t mean it. She didn’t think it was offensive. Kary says she’s not going in circles about this with LeeAnne. LeeAnne says she and Kary aren’t close, and she’s good with that, but she’s saying she’s sorry. It’s Kary’s choice to accept it or not. In her interview, Kary doesn’t see how she can get over LeeAnne being racist. Kameron says she’s not afraid of LeeAnne, and if she hears anyone says that, she’ll call them out. LeeAnne says she wants to be clear that she apologized, and Kary says, actions speak louder. LeeAnne says, actions can’t happen tonight. She’s going to go home. Kary says, an apology doesn’t cure everything.

In LeeAnne’s interview, she says she’s not racist. She never has been. She does bad things, but she’s not a bad person. There is a difference. The finale text says, LeeAnne hasn’t seen her mother since the wedding. She and Rich finally went on a honeymoon, but it wasn’t in Mexico.

D’Andra tells the others, her friendship with LeeAnne has been very one-sided. We read that she’s signed a contract with HSN, and paid the remainder of her office lease. God spoke to Mama Dee, and told her to give D’Andra the money.

In her interview, Kameron says people assume she’s a Highland Park blonde who married for money, but when they actually get to know her, they realize she’s more than that. I, for one, never thought Kameron was stupid, and I think Sparkle Dog Food was a stroke of genius. Her postscript says Kameron is struggling to maintain with her friendship with LeeAnne, but her friendship with Kary is going strong. They’re more than surface friends.

D’Andra says Kary is her favorite Mexican, and Kary says she’s excited to share more memories with the women. In parting, it says that Kary is still waiting for a house with both her and Eduardo’s name on it. She’s been selling her jewelry at trunk shows, and has yet to get LeeAnne a wedding gift. Hmm… I wonder what Kameron would say about that.

Brandi’s goodbye words say that she and Bryan still haven’t made a decision about adopting Bruin’s sibling, Brooklyn made the cheer team (which one, it doesn’t say), and Brandi is missing her glory days. She’s considering joining an adult cheer squad.

In Stephanie’s interview, she says, it’s been a hard year emotionally, but she’s stronger, and she knows who she is. For the first time, she’s okay with who she sees in the mirror. Her season ending says she’s continuing therapy, and still taking medication for her depression. There’s also been a new addition to the family – a dog named Teddy.

Court takes a group photo, minus LeeAnne. Is that prophetic?

She might be a lot of things, but I don’t think LeeAnne is racist. I think she latched on the Mexican adjective because Kary keeps harping on Mexico this and Mexican that, and how it applies in whatever situation she’s in, as though being Mexican makes her smarter, better, faster, whatever. It’s actually kind of annoying, and I think that’s why LeeAnne started focusing on it. Just my two cents.

Next time – The Reunion: Part One.

The Real Housewives of Orange County – The Reunion: Part One

This wasn’t the world’s most interesting reunion, but they’re just warming up. There was still enough screeching to last a lifetime. Andy said the OC Wives were still bringing the drama freshly squeezed, but I don’t know how fresh it is at this point.

Shannon started off well, with forgetting her Spanx, and having to go back home to get them.

It was established, now that the divorce has been finalized, Shannon is fun, single, and free, and Fun Shannon was discussed. Andy asked if it was true Shannon got $1.4 million in the settlement, as well as $10K a month. Shannon feigned ignorance about the final figure, only saying that seemed to high, but she did admit she was getting $10K a month. However, she’d expected more based on the lifestyle they’d had. They moved on to Shannon’s new boyfriend, and she said she met someone when she wasn’t looking, and he’s everything she’s looking for. They haven’t talked about the marriage question, but they have talked about the future.

In the dressing room, Vicki was annoyed that she’d been kept waiting. Drama queen told the producer, if they didn’t want her, just let her go.

Gina got stupid with Emily, saying she needed to be selfish this year, and needed Emily to be there for her. Emily said she could say the same thing. Gina wasn’t there for her, and was judgmental behind her back. When Gina came to talk to Emily about her DUI, her judgement level was zero. Gina says she thought Emily was disappointed, and had asked if Gina was drinking more than usual. Emily asked if she should have said, great job, or good for you? What was really annoying was Tamra and Kelly sniping at each other throughout the whole thing, so no one could be clearly understood.

Still not on stage yet, Vicki whined that the show had gone down since she’s not the leader anymore. She felt like a bottom feeder. She finally shut up when Steve suggested they go home. Vicki did look the best I’ve ever seen her, in a mustard-colored gown with sparkly trim. Andy asked Emily if there had been a change in Gina since hanging out with the tres amigas, and Emily said she felt a distance between them. Gina didn’t want to talk as much, although they did lots of talking among themselves. Andy says Tamra insisted Emily knew that Shane’s cousin had a girlfriend, when Emily swore she didn’t. Tamra said someone told her. Emily said she told Tamra different, and Tamra said maybe she didn’t believe Emily. Gina and Emily eventually declared themselves like sisters, and hugged it out. Gina being the one to get up, since Emily is still recovering from hip surgery.

At last, Vicki was brought out, Andy introducing her as Jane Row, before her actual name. She immediately started bitching about him making her wait, and he explained that the OG of the OC is also Jane Row, using the name in a lawsuit against Bravo, and the producers of a show called Evolution, the crux of which is the lawsuit Kelly brought up. Vicki said she’s had her own business for 31 years, and anyone who insinuates she’s a con-woman is getting sued. Apparently she had also filed for a restraining order against Kelly, but it was denied.

This led to the next screaming match, between Vicki and Kelly, about who is a real businesswoman. Vicki ended up shrieking, get off my show! and when Braunwyn pointed out it’s not her show, Vicki said none of them would be there if it hadn’t been for her starting it all years ago.

If she says so, but I had no idea it had started as a one-woman show. 😕 Next time – The Reunion: Part Two.

🍝 On The Real Housewives of New Jersey, it was Easter, so there was a lot of family stuff. Jennifer had her gay brother over for a visit, and explained that she was raised in a family that didn’t talk about things, but doesn’t want the same for her kids. While watching this show, I almost liked Jennifer, but I’m sure she’ll change my opinion back in no time.

Danielle met with Teresa, who said she’d had too much cabernet. When Danielle asked about Jailbird Joe, Teresa gave us the quote of the night: Do you think I don’t feel like drinking a bottle of tequila every night? That pretty much said it all. For us too.

At Easter dinner, David was bugged by Dolores’s entire family about making a commitment to Dolores, embarrassing them both. It was bittersweet at Teresa’s house. While the family was all together, the girls were missing Joe #1, and there was some concern over Papa Gorga’s health. He wasn’t looking too good. Joe #1 called, and everyone ended up crying. At the end, Joe #2 told everyone they had to eat the sprinkle cookies, because they were symbolic of never letting the little things affect them again.

🎅 I’m Wived Out…

But Santa is on his way soon, so it’s all good.