What I Watched Today

(rambling, random thoughts & annoyingly detailed recaps from real time TV watching)

General Hospital

Hayden plays catch with Aiden in the park. As she runs backward, Finn grabs her.

Jax thinks Nina’s been avoiding him. She arrived late for the budget meeting, and left as soon as it was over. It’s clear she doesn’t want to talk to him. It’s no way to run a business. She agrees, and says professional communication is crucial. She asks if he has Crimson business to discuss. Is she falling short? He says they’re on budget, the readership is up; she’s delivered everything she promised. She says, they agree the magazine is thriving. Is there anything else he wanted to discuss? Unless he wants to discuss his campaign to undermine her fiancé.

Valentin walks into the MetroCourt restaurant, and sees Laura with Curtis. Laura tells Curtis she spoke to Spencer. He asks if Spencer was behind the search for the codicil in Mikkos’s will. She says her grandson has a casual relationship with the truth, especially if it’s something he wants. Curtis says, he denied it, and Laura says, uh-huh. He acted like it was no big deal, but she thinks he got her message. She wants to make it crystal clear that Spencer is not to be involved, or Lulu. The only person from her family who’s working with him is her.

Elizabeth runs into Charlie’s. Julian asks if something is wrong with Franco. She says she had him committed. It’s just for the time being. The more distance that’s put between him and Kim, the better, so Julian needs to leave town with her as soon as possible. Julian says he’s sorry, but he and Kim aren’t going anywhere. They’ve broken up.

Kim calls Franco from the park, and asks how he is. He says he’s been committed to Shadybrook, the latest in his humiliation. He’s glad to hear her voice though. She’s sorry Elizabeth is doing this to him; she has no right. He says, Franco is Elizabeth’s husband, and she thinks she does. He’s not insane. He’s in love with her, and what they have is real. She knows. Terry sees Kim, and asks if everything’s okay. Kim says no, but maybe she can help.

In the interrogation room, Diane says they all agreed, it was a clear-cut case of self-defense. Jordan says, that was before. New evidence has come to light. Diane says, it’s evidence based on hearsay. Jordan says, in addition to Sheri’s statement, they have evidence from another source that incriminates Sam. It’s Sam herself. Jordan plays a recording where Sam is saying she wants Shiloh dead and buried for what he’s done to her sister and the other women at DoD, and to her. She’ll do anything in her power to make that happen.

Finn tells Hayden, sorry. He thought she was going into the rocks. Aiden asks if Hayden is okay, and Hayden tosses the Frisbee back. Finn says he’s impressed, and she says he didn’t know she could throw things? She says, Aiden is great, and she’s realized, kids can be fun.

Sam says, that’s impossible, and Jason says, she’s being set up. Jordan asks if it’s her voice, and Diane tells Sam not to answer. She needs a moment with her client. Jordan steps out of the room, and Sam says, this is ridiculous. Diane tells Sam that she just moved from an uncontested, clear-cut case of self-defense to a possible charge of premeditated murder.

Valentin sees Curtis and Laura at the MetroCourt, and says, two birds with one stone. He can handle both of them. Laura asks why they need to be handled, and Valentin says he’s been a little busy planning the wedding, so it’s fortuitous to find them both in the same place. Laura says they were just discussing Cassandra. Unfortunately, the WSB won’t be able to extradite her to the Hague. Valentin says, she’s an international criminal. Laura says Cassandra will be standing trial there, and she’s going to have a front row seat. Who knows what secrets Cassandra will spill on the stand?

Terry asks what Kim needs, and Kim says Terry knows Elizabeth had Drew committed. Terry says she knows Elizabeth is concerned for her husband. Kim says Terry is Elizabeth’s best friend. Maybe she can get through. Terry isn’t sure she follows, and Kim says, what Elizabeth is doing is cruel. They sit on a bench, and Kim says, Elizabeth is punishing Drew. It’s not his fault. It was Franco’s choice to step in and save Cameron. Everything that happening is Shiloh’s fault, no one else’s. Terry asks what Kim wants her to do, and Kim says, Franco is gone; Drew is there. Her Drew. The Drew that remembers their love; Oscar’s father. Maybe she can help Elizabeth recognize that Drew is real. Pretending he’s crazy isn’t going to change anything. Terry takes Kim’s hands in her own, and says it was remarkable how Kim rallied again and again during Oscar’s illness, up until their last moment together. She was heroic Kim asks what that has to do with the pain Elizbeth is inflicting on Drew? Franco is gone, and Elizabeth needs to accept that. Terry says, maybe Elizabeth isn’t the one who needs to accept that someone is gone. Clinging to the memory of Oscar’s father won’t bring Oscar back. Kim says she should have known Terry wouldn’t understand. Terry says she understands Kim has experienced an extraordinary loss. Kim says, Franco is a memory. Drew is real, and he’s not crazy. Kim stomps off.

Elizabeth says Julian helped Kim through hell. He said he loves her, and Kim said herself that starting over with him was her only chance. Julian says, that was before she found another option. He’s sorry for what Elizabeth is going through. He thought all Kim needed was distance, but Franco has Drew’s memories, and Drew is Oscar’s father. Any connection to Oscar, no matter how tenuous, is more important to her than their relationship. Elizabeth says, so he’s just walking away? It’s clear that Kim is sick and confused. The connection she’s holding on to isn’t real. Franco is Elizabeth’s husband. Julian knows it’s a horrible situation, and he’s sorry she’s going through it, but there’s nothing he can do. Elizabeth says everyone knows who Julian is, and how willing he is to get his hands dirty. Don’t stand there and tell her that he won’t help, because he damn well will.

Julian says he’ll disregard what Elizabeth said because she’s angry. She has a right to be, but he can’t stop Kim from acting on her feelings. He’s truly sorry about that. She asks if he thinks saying he’s sorry will make it better. Sorry is when one of her kids comes home late or someone accidentally cuts her off. It’s not going to help her husband, or help Julian’s girlfriend from feeding into Franco’s illusion. She’s tired of everyone saying they’re sorry. They’re sorry they misjudged Franco; they’re sorry they didn’t catch Shiloh faster. They’re sorry there’s only a one in four chance she’ll get Franco back. She needs him to fight for Kim like his life depends on it, because hers does. She’s crossed lines she never thought she would to save her husband. She had him committed. Don’t offer her sympathy; help her.

Kim visits Drew, who says, it’s nice to see a friendly face; a beautiful face at that. He thanks her for coming, and she says, of course (🍷) she came. He needed her. He says it’s nice to be with someone who acts like they want to see him. She can’t believe it’s gone this far, and he says, Elizabeth is just desperate. She can’t accept that Franco is gone. He tried to convince Elizabeth that he’s real. Kim says they’re all victims of Shiloh, but he says he doesn’t think that helps. When he looks in Elizabeth’s eyes, he can see how she feels. Kim tells him, look into hers. He’s a good man, and she sees him. Bleh.

Jax tells Nina that he’s been dealing with the Cassadines off and on for many years. He trusts Alexis implicitly, but she’s the exception. Stephan and Nikolas tried to double-cross him, and he’d be naïve to think that Valentin isn’t a potential threat. Nina asks if he isn’t being a little melodramatic, and he says, not really. Since Valentin tried to drug him at their dinner party.

Laura asks if she said something upsetting, and Valentin says Cassandra means nothing to him. He’s too busy focusing on the wedding. Laura says she forgot what a hopeless romantic he is; always looking for his happily ever after. He says, it’s finally here. He heard Curtis is joining them at the bon voyage to his bachelorhood. Are they still on? Curtis says he can’t wait. Valentin tells Laura that Charlotte is looking forward to their visit, and asks when he should drop her off. She thinks it’s better if she spends the night at his place. Is that a problem?

Diane asks Sam, is there any chance… Sam says, none. Diane says even with their surveillance of Shiloh, which included allegedly illegal video and listening devices that she knows nothing about? Jason says, the house is clean. Diane says, it is now. Sam says she never said a word or expressed her feelings outside of there. If that’s her voice, the tape has been edited or cloned. Diane says then they’ll proceed with the argument that the tape is fake. Jason asks if they can request their own expert, and Diane says if he’s referring to Spinelli applying his illegal operations, it could be tricky. The court is about to close, and she has to act fast if Sam doesn’t want to spend the night in jail. Diane leaves, and Sam says they should have seen it coming. Of course (🍷) Shiloh would find a way to hurt them, even from his grave.

Valentin says Laura is Charlotte’s grandmother; she’s always welcome. He was under the impression that she was uncomfortable there. She says, because it was Nikolas’s home? He says, now it’s Charlotte’s home, and Laura says, that’s her point. Charlotte is excited about the wedding, and wants to help Nina get ready. Valentin thinks it’s a great idea. Charlotte will get the benefit of a good night’s sleep beforehand in her own bed. He asks what time she wants to come, and she says she’ll text what time she and Doc will be there. Valentin leaves, and Curtis says she’s good. Laura hopes it pays off. She only has one night to search Windymere.

Nina tells Jax that his statement is outrageous. He was perfectly fine at the dinner party. Jax says he told her Valentin tried to drug him. He thinks Hayden got the drink meant for him. Didn’t Nina notice how she was talking like she was given something to lower her inhibitions? Nina says maybe Hayden doesn’t know her limit. Jax says, true, he has no proof that Hayden got the drink meant for him. Nina says, or that the drink was drugged. Jax says he could press charges against Valentin for hiring Curtis to break into his office. Curtis would also be charged with corporate espionage. It’s a serious crime. Nina says he could do that, but there would be negative publicity for him. His security breached by the man he hired to run it? So much of business is the confidence people have in the CEO. Jax says, well played. They could call a truce. He likes her, and respects her judgment. Why she’s with Valentin, he’ll never understand, but she told him to stay out of her personal life, and he’s going to respect that. Nina has a better idea. Why not dive right in the middle of her personal life? If he wants to know the million reasons she loves Valentin, come to the wedding and see for himself.

Franco tells Kim, he’s being evaluated for schizophrenia, paranoia, and dissociative disorder. He has to prove his mind hasn’t been altered, and he’s capable of understanding his choices. Kim says she’ll be with him every step of the way. She’s going to help him find a lawyer to prove his competency. He thanks her, and says it would be great if he had an attorney interested in safeguarding his rights. She says he’s not alone. They’re going to face this together.

Hayden tells Aiden, nice catch, and he asks if he can get a snack. She tells him to stay where she can see him. Before he runs off, Finn says Hayden showed him Aiden’s finger-painting, and it’s a great use of color. Aiden says he doesn’t finger-paint; that’s for babies. Hayden tells Aiden to go quick, before there’s a line. She tells Finn, Aiden doesn’t like to talk about his finger-painting because it’s not age appropriate, and he doesn’t want to be compared to Jake. Finn says, you’re never too young for sibling rivalry. He asks how her stay with Elizabeth is going, and she says, good. She feels useful, like she’s helping out. He says she is. He feels terrible. Elizabeth was so happy on her wedding day. Now their lives have been turned upside down. Hayden says, and Elizabeth is watching the man she was going to spend the rest of her life with, build a future with someone else.

Sam tells Jason, it’s no secret that she hated Shiloh. Jason says the only person she told that to was him, and those weren’t the words she would use. She says what if she said it while she was drugged? He tells her not to fall into Shiloh’s trap, and doubt herself. They’re assuming the recording is fake. She just has to be patient. She says that’s his best virtue. Her, not so much. He says he’ll be with her every step of the way.

Diane tells Jordan that she’s going to make a motion that the recording be excluded as evidence. State law prevents anyone from being recorded without permission, and her client never gave it. Jordan says, only one person has to give their permission. Diane asks, who else was there? Jordan says, all in good time, and Diane says, the time is now. The recording is fake. Either Sam’s voice appears nowhere on it, or Sam’s words were pieced together. Knowing how she acquired this piece of evidence could point them in the right direction of the true criminal. Jordan says, Daisy disclosed it. She’s the one Sam is talking to. Diane says, Daisy remains an ardent supporter of Shiloh and Dawn of Day. She raided her trust fund to post Shiloh’s bail money. She’s hardly a credible witness. Jordan says that’s why Sam isn’t in jail. She made those threats… Diane says, which she ardently denies. Jordan says, until she hears back from audio forensics, Sam will remain in custody. Diane looks at Jason through the window, and shakes her head.

Jax says, Nina is inviting him to the wedding? She says he’s her boss. It’s only polite. He says she’s very generous, but he doesn’t know how her fiancé feels about that. Valentin walks in, and she says, ask him. Valentin says, ask him what? and she says she invited Jax to the wedding and he’s not sure how Valentin feels. Valentin says, clearly, Nina wants him there, so he should attend. Jax says he’d be delighted, and Nina says, it’s settled. She’s adding Jax to the guest list. He says he’ll see her tomorrow. He says he guesses he’ll be sitting on the bride’s side, but Nina says she and Valentin only have one side, and they’re on it together.

Elizabeth says she shouldn’t have gone off on Julian like that. Julian says he knows what it’s like to love someone so deeply, you start compromising what’s right. You start breaking rules before you realize it, you would risk anything. It’s a hard walk to walk. She asks if he thinks she’s going to quit, like he did with Kim. He says he didn’t quit. He just realized it’s not in his power to give Kim what she wants. Elizabeth says she knows Franco is in there, stranded behind Drew’s memories. What if he’s aware of what’s going on, and has no way of telling them. She can’t leave him like that. Julian hopes she gets what she needs, and she says, she needs her husband.

Aiden brings back a pretzel. Finn suggests mustard, but Aiden says he’s not a fan of yellow mustard; he prefers Dijon. He goes to play with the other kids, and Hayden says, he’s one of a kind. She likes the way Finn talks to Aiden, like he’s a person. Finn says he doesn’t discriminate based on height. His phone makes sounds, and he says it’s a time zone alert so he can call Anan when she’s awake. Hayden asks how Anna is, and he says, good. She can’t believe how much family Finn has accumulated in the time she was gone. He says he has a hard time wrapping his head around it sometimes. She must feel like that being with Elizabeth and her nephews. She says family is special to her, and he says he’s happy for her. He says he should go, and she says it was nice to see him.

Terry goes to see Franco. She says, hello, Franco, and he says if she’s waiting for him to recognize her, sorry. He doesn’t know her. She introduces herself, and says she and Elizabeth grew up together. She works with Kim, and she was Oscar’s oncologist. She grew fond of him and his parents. She’s there because Oscar would want her to look out for Kim. He says Kim isn’t in danger from him. On the contrary, he’s in love with her. Terry says, Kim is fragile. The strain of Oscar’s illness and death pushed her to the edge of reason. Franco asks if she thinks Kim being in love with him, and recognizing him as Drew, proves she’s crazy. She says, Kim is at her limit. Terry works with very sick kids, and knows the toll it takes on their parents. Kim is looking for healing and closure, and it takes time. She’s teetering on the edge of an emotional breakdown. The more swept up she gets in his situation, the closer she’s coming to losing herself completely.

Curtis asks Laura what that was about Valentin. Laura says, when Cassandra was arrested, she offered damaging information about Valentin in exchange for her freedom. Curtis says, and she turned Cassandra down? Laura says she didn’t see the point in exchanging on criminal for another, so she has absolutely no idea what it was, but Cassandra can provide a good distraction. Let Valentin think the threat is coming from Cassandra’s direction, while they proceed in another direction. Curtis likes the way Laura thinks. She says she only has tonight to search. Curtis says it’s a big house, and she’s looking for three sheets of paper, maximum. Laura says, hidden by Helena. She hates to admit it, but she knows how Helena’s mind works. It’s probably in a perverse location with a twist of dark humor. Helena appreciated her own sense of humor more than anyone else ever did. He asks if she thinks she can find it, and she says, if it’s hidden there, she can. Curtis appreciates how she’s staying on top of it, but they’re a team. He’s the P.I. Just lead him down the right path, and he’ll take it from there.

Hayden tells Finn there’s something she’s been keeping from him, and she can’t do it anymore. She lied about losing their child. She thought it was the right thing to do; to let him move on with his life. But there hasn’t been one day she hasn’t regretted it. They didn’t lose the baby. They have a daughter. She’s beautiful; the best of both of them. He doesn’t know how many times she’s dreamed of this moment. They hug.

Nina asks if Valentin minds that she asked Jax to the wedding. He asks if she’s kidding. He won’t even notice Jax. Nothing else matters than seeing her walking down the aisle to him. Nina says, except Charlotte and Sasha. She loves him today, tomorrow, and all the days after. Valentin says he can’t wait to give her everything, and she says, how about a hamburger? She’s starving. He says, his bride wants a burger, then a burger his bride will get.

Jax sits with Laura and Curtis, and says Hayden told him that she might have revealed the content of the document they’re trying to find. Laura says, he’s involved too? Curtis says he still needs to fill Laura in. Jax assumed Hayden would have told her. She says it’s the first she’s heard of it. But now that the cat is out of the bag, why would Jax be interested in the codicil to Mikkos’s will? He says since Valentin has been in charge, he’s decreased the value of Cassadine Industries. He’s interested in a certain elements of the company, but knows Valentin won’t sell them to him. With Valentin disinherited, he won’t be a factor. She says so he’s looking for leverage in a business opportunity. Curtis says, that sounds like a wise move. Jax says secrecy is at the request of the person they’re trying help. Laura says she understands, and Spencer is no longer involved. Her family’s involvement begins and ends with her. Jax says he respects her concerns. What’s next? Curtis says he and Laura have a plan they’ve set in motion.

Kim goes to Charlie’s. Julian asks if she needs something, and she says she found some of his things. She gives him a box, saying she thought he’d want them for the move to Manhattan. He tells her, thanks, but he’s not moving anymore. She asks what about his plans for a new bar? He says he’ll figure it out. Manhattan was about her. There’s nothing there for him anymore. She says she’s so sorry. She didn’t mean to hurt him. He says he knows, and Kim says he was right. She was lying to herself about the way she feels about Drew. Even though he’s in Franco’s body, it’s nothing she can stop or control. He says he knows it’s out of her control.

Franco says it’s not enough that Elizabeth is having him committed or thinks he’s sick for believing he’s Drew. Now Terry thinks Kim is sick for believing he’s Drew. Terry says, Kim is already emotionally fragile, and the added strain of dealing with his situation is too much for her. He says, no offense, but Terry has no idea what it’s like live in this twisted reality, and to be in the entirely wrong body. To look in the mirror and realize, you’re someone you were never meant to be. I laugh because he has no idea. He says, Kim is the only person in the world who accepts him for who he is. He loves her, and she loves him. Who the hell is Terry to tell him to give that up?

Hayden says Finn didn’t come to Rome. He says he was angry, and tried to get over her. He loves Anna, but he never stopped wishing for the life they’d planned. She says, he’s not angry? and he says he’s furious, but they’ll sort that out. He wants to see their daughter. Take him to her. They can be a family together. Elizabeth asks where Hayden was just now. Hayden says, in an alternate universe where everything works out the way it’s supposed to.

Jordan gets the forensics report. In the interrogation room, Diane tells Sam and Jason, this is a good news bad news situation. The recording is troubling, but Daisy is a less than credible witness. Audio forensics is checking it out now. Providing they can prove it’s a fake, she’ll have Sam out in no time.

Kim tells Julian that she doesn’t know how she would have made it through these last few months without his care. She does love him. Julian said he thought his love would help ease her suffering. She says, it did. As best as it could. Julian says he can’t help worrying that she’s walking into hurt. He tells her, take care of herself. She says she won’t be alone, and Julian says, yeah. Like an unconvinced yeah.

Terry tells Franco that she understands how it feels to be trapped. In fact, she thinks Kim is trapped too. She’s trapped inside her roll as a mother. She’s not seeing clearly. And Franco reminds her about a love that’s in the past. Kim won’t heal or move forward if this goes on. If he loved her, he would set her free.

Elizabeth asks Hayden to tell her about the alternate universe, and Hayden says, it doesn’t matter. What’s going on with her? Elizabeth says, the same. When she sees Franco, he’s getting farther and farther away. She’s never felt so alone. Hayden says she’s sorry. It’s a terrible thing to live with. She wants Elizabeth to know she’s there for her. Elizabeth thanks her, and says she’s there for Hayden too. They hug.

Valentin and Nina go to the MetroCourt, and see Jax sitting with Curtis and Laura. Valentin says that’s an interesting sight. It doesn’t bode well with him. Jax shouldn’t want anything to do with Curtis after Curtis was caught spying on him. Yet there they are, talking to Laura, who despises him. Nina says they’re probably saying nasty things about him, and that she’s a fool for marrying him, but all that matters is that they love each other. Valentin likes the way she thinks. They kiss, but he still has an eye on the table.

Laura says Valentin and Nina will be out of the house. As soon as Charlotte is in bed, she and Doc are free to search. Jax appreciates her help, but in a few weeks, this has spread to a few people – him, Hayden, Curtis, Laura, and now Doc. The longer they drag it out, the more people there are to mess up. They need a swift conclusion. Laura says, with a little luck, she’ll find what they’re looking for tonight.

Jordan comes back, and Diane says she assumes the tape is fake. Jordan says she ran the test twice. There’s no indication that it’s been doctored, and it matches Sam’s voice print. Daisy agreed to be recorded, so it’s admissible. The arrest stands. She’s charging Sam with the murder of David Henry Archer, aka Shiloh, and taking her into custody. Sam is cuffed, and Jordan tells the officer, take her to booking. Sam looks at Jason as she’s being led away, and he makes a worried face.

Tomorrow, Doc reveals something at Windymere, Peter asks how you throw a bachelor party for someone who has no friends, and Maxie arranges a spa day for Nina.

The Real Housewives of Orange County

We go back to last week’s ending, with Vicki saying  none of them have any intention of hurting each other. Kelly says if Vicki has no intention of hurting her, why is she always looking for dirt on Kelly? In Shannon’s interview, she says she brought them there for healing, but so far, the trip is a sh*t show. 

20 hours earlier. Shannon is excited to be there. 18 hours earlier. Kelly gongs Shannon’s head. 15 hours earlier. Shannon goes to the ER. 4 hours earlier. Kelly tells Tamra and Shannon that bringing Vicki was not being her friend. Vicki ruined her freaking life. 3 hours earlier. Emily and Gina argue. Not long ago. Shannon is feeling like the trip is an epic failure

Now. Kelly walks out. Vicki says Kelly is blaming her for her own bad reputation. She’s not allowed at her daughter’s school. Tamra asks what she means. Vicki says she doesn’t know if it’s still happening , but she couldn’t go to her daughter’s school. Emily asks if Vicki means Kelly is legally not allowed on the property, and Vicki nods. Tamra asks if Vicki knows this, or just heard it. Vicki says she doesn’t have a daughter who goes to that school. Emily asks how she knows, and Vicki says, schematics. Let’s just say she wasn’t allowed. At the end of the day, she didn’t damage Kelly’s reputation.

Kelly orders some food for herself, Braunwyn, and Emily. Braunwyn is glad she didn’t go. She tells Emily they’re going to be okay. In Emily’s interview, she appreciates the optimism, but feels emotionally drained. It was a difficult fight with Gina. It went deep, and things were said that were uncalled for. She still feels hurt. Kelly can’t believe what Vicki said, and Emily tells Kelly that, after she left, Vicki said she’s not allowed to set foot on the property at her daughter’s school. Kelly says she is too allowed, and Emily says she asked if Vicki meant legally not allowed, and she said yes. Kelly asks if Vicki is insane. She’ll call the school now, and prove it. She calls Michael, and asks if she’s allowed at Jolie’s school, and he says there’s no issue about her being around Jolie anytime. Kelly says, Vicki is a psycho bitch. Where does she get this information from?

Gina says she’s tired, and wants to take a nap. Tamra tells Vicki that she can’t say things like that. Don’t talk about the things she hears. Vicki says the lady sitting next to her when she was getting her hair done, has a daughter who goes to school with Jolie. She said Kelly can’t go to her kid’s school. She didn’t tell anyone. Tamra says, she just did. In Tamra’s interview, she says, Vicki brings this on herself. She throws a bomb, there’s an explosion, then she wonders what’s wrong. She tells Vicki to shut her effing mouth. If she didn’t hear it from Kelly, don’t repeat it.

Kelly calls Shannon, saying she heard Vicki said she’s not allowed on daughter’s school campus. Is she insane? Shannon has the phone on speaker, and Tamra and Vicki listen. Kelly asks how the hell she can say that. Shannon says Vicki told them it happened a long time ago. Kelly says, she’s a goddam liar. She can’t stop lying. Kelly says she told Vicki, she can’t do that, and the second she leaves, Vicki does it. She makes up lies, and she continuously goes after Kelly. Vicki says, tell Kelly to leave her alone. Tamra takes the phone, and says she told Vicki straight out, it’s not cool. Kelly says, what next? She’s a murderer? She can’t be around a psycho. Vicki takes the phone, and says she’s not a psycho. Kelly says she is. She’s a pig bitch, and a bleeping bleepity bleep. Kelly hangs up, and Vicki asks if Tamra is okay with how Kelly was talking to her. Tamra says she’s talking like that because of what Vicki said . In Tamra’s interview, she says, Vicki and Kelly are a lot alike. That’s the problem. She wants them to get along, but neither one of them is taking the steps they need get to get to that point. Vicki says, it’s Emily’s fault for repeating a rumor. She wouldn’t repeat something. Tamra says she just did.

Emily says maybe she shouldn’t have said anything, but Kelly says, it would have come out anyway. Vicki just keeps going .The food comes, and Kelly says she doesn’t know where Vicki gets it. Braunwyn thinks she makes it up. They talk about getting a text from Shannon about going to a beehive demonstration. Shannon told them they’d better bee-have. Kelly says she’s not going, and Emily says she shouldn’t be around someone who constantly says defamatory things. Braunwyn tells Kelly, don’t give her the power.

Shannon wants everyone to wear the leggings she’s gotten them. They’re going to have fun. She wanted to give everyone a fun gift, and who doesn’t like costumes? The leggings have each of the women’s faces on them. In Shannon’s interview, she says, get over it. Put the leggings on, and put a smile on your face.

A sign says, warning: active beehive. Braunwyn says Kelly is on the couch. She couldn’t even read. She’s angry. Back at the villa, Kelly gets into the pool nakey. Beekeeper Noel teaches introductory bee class. I would love this. He says the name of the game is, no exposed skin, He wants every square inch covered. Tamra tries to matchmake, saying Shannon likes him. They get into their bee suits, and Tamra tells Noel that Shannon is nice, single, and has a lot of money. Noel demonstrates using smoke to distract the bees, which makes them easier to work with. It doesn’t sedate them; it’s not that kind of smoke. Shannon says she’s afraid of bees. Vicki tells Noel to put his hood on, and he appreciates her concern, but says he doesn’t always use the gear. He takes out the honeycomb, and explains how bees work. Tamra says Vicki think she’s the queen bee, and Noel says she probably wouldn’t want to be one, since they mate with up to thirty bees, then spend the rest of their life laying eggs. Although it’s worse to be the drone she mates with, since he hurtles to his death afterward.  In Gina’s interview, she says she’s not doing as well as the bees. It’s getting cold, and so they go back, and huddle under blankets to drink champagne. Tamra asks what they’re doing tonight, and Shannon says, cooking dinner. She’s annoyed that they haven’t done something as an entire group.

Kelly calls Jolie from the pool. She wishes Jolie was there. She says, the others went on a bee excursion, and Vicki is being an a-hole. She’s making up lies again, and told everyone Kelly’s not allowed at her school. Jolie tells Kelly, Vicki is making this stuff up because she has a boring life. Whatever. In Kelly’s interview, she says, Vicki has nothing going on. Her kids have moved out, and she has a boring boyfriend, so she wants to invest her time in talking about Kelly. She tells Jolie that she couldn’t find a suit, so she’s kicking it live. Jolie tells her, that’s gross.

Gina apologizes to Emily. Emily tells her that she said a lot of mean things. We flash back again to their fight. She’s been sharing things with others, and not telling Emily. It hurt her feelings when Gina said Shannon was her best friend now. In Emily’s interview, she says she’s always been there for Gina, and that’s why it hurt so deeply. Emily says she knows Gina thinks it’s weird, but it was hard without Shane, then hard when he came back. They weren’t getting along, and him surprising her was a good thing. When Gina put that down, it hurt her feelings. She felt abandoned by Gina. In Gina’s interview, Gina says, that’s not what it feels like. That’s not abandonment. She tells Emily that’s she’s been going through catastrophic emotions, and acting weird. Things happened that the others could relate to more. They were more open to it because they’ve been there. In her mind, it was separate from what was going on with her an Emily. She wants that close connection, but they both have to make the effort to fix it. They hug, and Gina says she’s sorry, but she’s glad it happened. It needed to come to a head. In her interview, Gina says she regrets their fight. She could have been kinder. Emily is one of her best and dearest friends. She’s real and authentic, and Gina can’t imagine not having Emily in her life.

The ladies dress for dinner. Braunwyn asks if Kelly had a nice break, and Kelly says she went swimming. Kelly calls Brian, who’s at dinner with friends. She tells him that Vicki drove her nuts, and he tells her to stay calm. Vicki is trying to get to her. Kelly says, she’s doing a damn good job, but Brian says, it’s silliness. Kelly says Vicki is trying to ruin her reputation. Not that she has one to uphold. He tells her to be herself. Braunwyn suggests if Kelly gets frustrated or stressed, excuse herself and call Brian. He has a calming effect.

Tamra asks Shannon what they’re doing tonight, and Shannon says, cooking some things. Vicki says she’s getting circles under her eyes, and wonders what procedure she needs to have done. Tamra says she’s tired, and needs to recover. Shannon says when she’s exhausted, the only thing that wakes her up is a drink.

Kelly says she hangs out with Shannon, and talks to Tamra every day. They hurt her by bringing Vicki.

Shannon tells them, have fun and don’t fight. They realize they’re all wearing blazers from the same designer. Shannon babbles something loudly in Spanish about the tres amigas.

Kelly says, Vicki is persona non effing grata. Braunwyn tells her, just smile and nod, and makes Kelly practice. In Kelly’s interview, she says that’s not like her. She’s more like this. She gives the finger with both hands. Braunwyn says they’ll have fun if it kills them.

In Gina’s interview, she says she just needs one fun moment. She needs it like a crackhead needs a hit. The other girls come to their villa. Kelly stays quiet. Tamra says all they have is vodka and tequila. She asks if Kelly is okay, and Kelly says she has a migraine. In Gina’s interview, she says she’s stoked that Emily and Tamra are getting along. Maybe a little too well. She wonders if she should remind them about the sh*t they said about each other, and laughs. They toast to fun. Kelly smiles and nods. They clink glasses. In Vicki’s interview, she says if Kelly wants to talk about it calmly, she’s all about it. If not, you can’t force a friendship. She’ll just ignore Kelly, and not look for her to be kind.

They go to the resort restaurant. Emily wonders why they’re not making dinner, and Tamra says she can do that at home. Inside, stations are set up to make drinks. The instructor says they’re going to start with bartending, and learn how to make the restaurant’s signature drink Kelly flips her shaker a la Cocktail. In her interview, she says she has a master’s degree in partying. She has skills that can pay the bills. Shannon says she’s ready for food. They sit, and a chef says there are stations set up for them to create the first course – salad. Gee, that’s a hard one. In Emily’s interview, she says she’s an attorney and doesn’t think they should mix knives and alcohol with these women. Kelly has already committed two assaults. You don’t provide knives to batsh*t crazy a-holes. Tamra tells Kelly that she told Vicki what she said wasn’t cool. Kelly says, it’s obnoxious, and Tamra tells her that she said if Vicki doesn’t hear it directly from Kelly, don’t repeat it. In Kelly’s interview, she says, talk is cheap. Is Tamra sincerely trying to stop Vicki from spreading rumors? Not really. Braunwyn asks if Kelly has shared the texts Jolie got, but Kelly says she doesn’t need to. She doesn’t subscribe to still being friends with someone who causes her friends trouble. In her interview, she says she’s not an idiot. She knows Tamra is playing both sides. Where does her loyalty lie? She asks Tamra how she can continue being Vicki’s friend when Vicki does awful, disgusting things.

The chef tells them to take their salads to their seats. It does look good. Shannon says, cheers to an amazing salad. It’s called teamwork. Braunwyn demonstrates that she’s still lactating, and says she’s been nursing for nineteen years. A couple of takeaway points for me. She does look incredible for basically being pregnant for twenty years, and maybe it’s a mom thing, but how can they all be so interested in her mom boobs? Tamra says they are at the dinner table. Tamra asks Kelly about what they did after Vegas. She heard they crushed a car. We see a clip of them at the Dig This Amusement Park, doing exactly that. The car says Vicki and has a drawing of the emoji pic on the hood. Kelly says, they crushed sh*t up. She put Vicki’s face on it, if they must know. Tamra says Kelly destroyed Vicki’s face? and Vicki says she’s ugly; it’s okay. Tamra says they never said that. Kelly says she thinks Vicki is pretty, and Vicki thinks Kelly is pretty too. Everyone goes, aww! Shannon says Vicki told her that Kelly’s hair looked pretty at the airport. Vicki starts crying, and Kelly says she never hurt Vicki. She’s always been on Vicki’s side, and it’s disheartening to see her. Vicki doesn’t know what she’s done to Kelly. Kelly starts to cry, and says she never did anything to Vicki. She called Vicki a pig, and knew it hurt Vicki’s feelings, but she doesn’t really think Vicki is a pig. Gina thinks they love each other. Kelly doesn’t understand it, and Vicki says she surrenders. Kelly says it’s hard to look at Vicki, and Vicki hugs her, saying, they have a history. In Vicki’s interview, she says, hearing Kelly’s pain makes her feel bad. She feels accountable for the at least I don’t do cocaine comment. They locked eyes for the first time in a long time. Kelly tells Vicki that she doesn’t do cocaine or trains, and she’s allowed at her daughter’s school. Vicki says she’s done, and Tamra says they’re both sorry. Shannon wants them to make a promise; no more low blows. In Shannon’s interview, she says they’ve both been cruel, but she knows deep down, there’s a friendship. Kelly and Vicki hug. Kelly says Vicki ruined it with Jolie; she hates Vicki now. Vicki says she’s sorry, and Kelly says her too, but she’s only had Vicki’s back. In Kelly’s interview, she says she doesn’t want to continue with the ugliness. It hurts her feelings. She’s a kind person and has a heart. In Tamra’s interview, she says, hell has frozen over. She hopes it lasts. Shannon makes a toast, saying, cheers to the miracle of Miraval. Tamra says, let’s get naked, and Shannon says she knew that was coming.

Gina says Emily is her best friend, and she would never roll on her. She just got mad. Emily says she’s allowed. Tamra and Braunwyn get in the pool nakey. Vicki tells Tamra that she’s a grandmother and a mother; she needs to stop that. In Tamra’s interview, she says, to be part of the tres amigas, you have to be able to drink all night, take your clothes off at 3 am, and be a total a-hole. That means someone is getting kicked out. Bye, Vicki. Gina and Emily go to the hot tub at Gina’s casita. Braunwyn asks if it’s warm, and gets in. Gina says she’s not a nudie, but she’s adjusting. Tamra gets in next. Gina wonders what’s happening, and why is she the only one who brought an appropriate bathing suit.

Shannon gives a hard no to being outside and wet. Kelly gripes about getting older, saying, things are changing. Vicki says she’s going to be fifty-seven. How did that happen? They somehow get on the subject of furries (google it), and Braunwyn admits to having a threesome now and then. She and her husband have been together since they were teenagers. In her interview, Emily thinks it would be weird waking up the next morning. She asks where Braunwyn finds another girl, and she says it was a friend of a friend. Emily asks if they do it at Braunwyn’s house, but Braunwyn says, no; that would be weird. Like it’s normal to begin with. She says it’s more about her; her husband doesn’t have sex with the other girl. Gina is confused, and Braunwyn says she’s definitely straight, but she likes it occasionally, like every ten years. Tamra doesn’t think Eddie would go for that. In Braunwyn’s interview, she says she’d pick Tamra out of the group, and in Tamra’s interview, she says Braunwyn does have those luscious lips. She might be a little curious. In the hot tub. Braunwyn laughs like a dolphin.

Next time, Kelly tells Michael it hurts, Emily gets together with Alexis, Shannon gets rejuvenation in her nether regions, and Gina tells Tamra it was a pity date.

👌 Butt He Didn’t Mind…

In case you’re following the RHOP butt drama.

https://starmagazine.com/photos/rhop-michael-darby-andy-cohen-butt-ashley/

🚇 Almost Done…

LuAnn sees the light at the end of the probation tunnel.

https://radaronline.com/exclusives/2019/09/rhony-luann-de-lesseps-sober-completing-probation-might-change-mind-battery-arrest/

🚴 Well, She’s a Little Busy…

Like Bethenny has time to see more cabaret.

https://radaronline.com/exclusives/2019/09/luann-de-lesseps-rhony-cast-do-not-talk-bethenny-frankel-after-she-left-show/

🌓 You’re Half Week Life Is Here…

So step lively.